#i didnt know people did the “woke” thing for male characters too

[mithrifer]

who the fuck is that.

[emeraldvagabond]

For a series about abuse and red flags, SJM sure made the awful choice to have all the “males” *gag* act the same way. But apparently things are only abusive and are only red flags when Tamlin does it. :/ Locking people up is fine as long as you’re not him. Being emotionally negligent *coughs Cassian* is fine as long as your not Tamlin. Keeping information about someone's powers and BODY is fine as long as you’re not Tamlin. Like the whole message on abuse falls flat.

: / right. Like,,,and one time she said she didnt want to write "alpha Male assholes"(meaning tamlin) without a reason...and I just keep think about Rhys always using his power and being like "IM the biggest and baddest and most powerful..." to prove a point or win an arguement..and???

ACOTAR tamlin was the uhhh?? complete opposite of an alpha male? but Rhys? reeks of "I'm the alpha" type vibes. I mean, he all but uses the word to describe himself. And he really genuinely thinks he is just the best thing that ever was.

Cassian too, but to like, a lesser extent. Azriel is just....fucking weird....get a life, my man. Tarquin and Lucien are about the only males🤢 she writes differently. Tamlin could have fit into that category but uh....we see what she did there. Helion and Thesan also fit into that category, I almost forgot about them because for some reason she likes to make all of her poc characters have 0 fucking importance in the story unless they're aiding her white protagonist or being used to zoom the plot forward, and always at the expense of themselves. I mean, even when we see Tarquin, he's being played by Feyre and Rhys while he is just....really being very honest and forthcoming and welcoming. Helion is in love with a white woman that refuses him, and has a son he doesn't know about...and it's...just to give Feyre a little shock at the highlord meeting? And the only other time we really hear of him is when he's shielding Feyre so no one knows she's pregnant?? Which, does he know it's going to kill her? Probably not because Rhys says he's practicing HIS shields...so theres the idea that Helion kind of just told him what to do and Rhys went "yuh jolly good". And went on his way?

Sorry. That's a completely different rant, I just woke up from like two days of basically straight sleep and im waiting for the sims to load.

But, the message on abuse DOES fall flat because of...all of these things. The main characters abuse EVERYONE they come across, all the time, not even just in their romantic relationships. Which...as soon as someone gets with someone else in these books they stop being a person and start being "their mate" which is so gross to me. Feyre and Nesta both loose everything that makes them unique characters as soon as they get connected to their "one" and its like?? if the gods and the universe saw you...and decided you two were good for eachither.....why do these women have to change everything about themselves after you get together? It's not like people can't change....but always with the whole character rewrites...it's exhausting.

And what is it with the cauldron pairing these girls with people that just...do not give a fuck about them. Cassian is supposed to know Nesta better than anyone but he just straight up doe not give a fuck when her family, or what is supposed to be her family, is straight up abusing her. Rhysand literally grooms and abuses Feyre for like....four fucking books and everyone is like "omg wow goals" but I guess it's to be expected when his father married his mother when he was like 800 and she was 18...even though I'm more than positive it says Fae dont mature until 80.

The whole story is just an abuse cycle. over and over and over.

I think Elain and Lucien could have been a good pair....if Elain had a MODICRUM of personality. Like...where is it. She pops up every 50 chapters to say some really dull line and then does nothing else for the rest of forever. Lucien is probably the least toxic mate we've seen, alongside Vivian and Kallias who arw about the only ones in the whole book who we see treat each other as actual equals and with any kind of respect. It's said Thesan and his unamed boyfriend, or fiance, or whatever he is...I cant remember because we're given NOTHING on him...are a good healthy couple, but we never get to see it...because why would we ever get to see a chinese-coded man be in a happy loving relationship with another man? Or really any gay couples, being happy and healthy. Or any gay couples at all?

again, another rant. I'm still waiting for the sims to load.

My point is where is the message about abuse when your protagonist leaves one person who abused them to go to another person who abuses them but with more ✨charm✨? Maybe the message should be that you cant always see abuse from the inside. I mean, Feyre doesnt even have friends outside Rhysands family. She is entirely isolated.....BECAUSE SHE IS BEING ABUSED. Its just:/ Sjm really tried to give...but it is not giving....it is taking. It's taking away from your "message" sjm. The message is lost. We've sailed an entire ocean and we left the message on the other shore. The message has been waiting for us to come back for 50 years. The message looks out from it's balcony and wonders when we will return from the war.

y'all get the point.

But shes trying really hard to be woke instead of just saying it's a dark romance/self insert. Like she said the King of Hybern was based off of Trump....but he was written before Trump was campaigning....she just...says shit. Couldn't tell you why, I'm not her. 🤷‍♀️

idk. my game still hasnt loaded I have too much cc.

[fandom-imagination-ss]

Imagine: your on your second day of your period and your boyfriend Peter tries too be the "perfect" boyfriend but it only makes you more miserable

99% of the time you were a happy go lucky person. You see the goodness in everything. A good ish family, good grades, and even a perfect boyfriend.. but then your period hits.

You suffer thru and try too mentally try too remind yourself that the world isn't full of idiots.. and that you murdering someone would end in prison and yojr too pretty too be in prison..

Normally that helps you get by. You been dating peter parker for almost a year he Logically knows you have a visit from that bitch aunt flow. But other by chance or luck whenever you were on it. He didnt see you your grumpy mood cause he was other saving the world or you played the poker face women have too try too muster up every month.

Tonight the luck dissapeared you were laying in bed. Second day. The Hell day. The day you ask the GOD'S what the Hell did you do to deserve this pain and blood?

Peter sneaked in thru your window a typical thing for him too do. But tonight you couldn't find the strength too fake happiness. Peter noticed you in bed a heating pad plugged in. Being a genius he realized instantly seeing the small box of halloween chocolates you bought on your way home. After school you were watching Outlander as he stood there horrified of the scene. You went too say something but he just turned jumping out of the room. You sat up a bit stunned. You scarred him before you could even say a word. That was impressive! Your mind jumped too be furious at Peter for being so Narrow minded and a idiot for just leaving. Your attention went from Peter too Jamie Fraser when he said he loved Clare. After that you were too swooned over a fictional character too care about Peter you would mock him for being scared later.

you were fast asleep when you felt your shoulder being nudged. You woke up slowly seeing Peter was leaning down being eye level too you as he spoke,”i bought you stuff.”

“what?”

shifting up too see he had a bag full of stuff, more chocolates, heating magic bag, Pads and tampons all different kinds and sizes. Two different Diva cups. And 2 bottles of water, Gingerale and green tea bags. At the bottom fo the bag you noticed a small stuffy as you looked up at Peter even more confused. “Why?”

“I know your on your period and I wanted too be supportive.”

you smiled weakly. Nodding your head. Even in your sour mood that was sweet and you couldn’t help break a small smile on your face. He carefully climbed into your bed. Making sure too Not touch you as you said thanks as you said you be right back. After a quick bathroom break you got back into bed seeing Peter was stretched out. It was Normal for Peter too sleep over. You both would have movie marathons and he would dl fall asleep. You tried ignoring your instant urge in your mind too Kick Peter out of your bed. Because he Did just buy you a lot of things so you just laid back down. As he softly wrapped his arm around you as he said it would be alright.

that Itch got harder too ingore feeling your boyfriend being Clingly your stoumch was twisting. The pain meds you took hours ago. Was worn off, you tried moving out of his grip going for the heating pad. Thinking he would get the hint. But Peter just instantly wrapped his arms around you again. “You on your first day?”

“Second.” You said softly. It was one thing talking too your female friends about periods but your boyfriend. A Male? It felt.. weird. A little wrong and embarrassing, common too feel but still.. you guess. Your relationship was at that stage where you talk about your uterus shredding.

“Try too get some sleep. I read ladies are exhusted during this time..”

you Knew Rationally He didn’t mean anything with that. But hearing him tell you how you felt. Made that angry itch. Bigger as you groaned out of frustration. He rubbed your arms thinking it was a cramp as you turned too him. “Pete.. I love you..And I know your trying too help and your being Sweet and that bag of. Gifts was incredible and Sweet but If you dont Go home.. and Give me space I’ll shove Friday up your nose.” He’s eyes grew large stunned hearing that as he spoke, “how- she’s a AI.”

“I Dont know just GO HOME!” You snapped as he leaped out of bed as he said okay and bolted. You instantly regretted snapping at him as you got up going too say sorry but peter was already gone. You sighed heavily texting him sorry as you went oo bed.

“She really said that?”

Ned hearing from Peter that you were Not only mean but basically threaten Peter he was stunned. He never Even heard you Cuss out. Let along hearing about you threatening Peter. He nodded his head weakly as peter chuckled, “it was actually pretty cute. I mean- she instantly apoglized..”

“but all my fan fiction reading I’ve read.. Girls Liekt hat stuff. That over the top attention during their time.” Ned stated as Peter rolled his shoulders stunned. MJ chuckled softly overhearing everything . She closed her book looking at them, “your both idiots. . I wouldn’t of even give you a warning.”

“But you been seeing y/n for over a year how-“ before Ned could finish you walked over sitting down beside Peter as you spoke, “I’m sorry i snapped.”

Peter chuckled as he spoke, “It was acturally pretty cute i never seen you grumpy.” Roll liing your eyes you spoke, “I dont.. Like being. Touched or Snugged or Hugged or- anything my tolerance for People Is so thin.. I just… I Just want too be in pain in in misery alone.. it’s for safety of people.” Peter chuckled as he spoke, ‘okay. When can I hug you again?”

“you can have a quick hug now… but then.. in three days.” He chuckled saying OKay. As he wrapped his arms around him as Ned spoke, ‘is that every Girl?”

“I cry uncontrollably during mine.. I’ts a vicious bitch. Having a period.” MJ stated as you agreed.

“God.. Men are so lucky they don’t have too deal with it.”

“Please.. The male species wouldn’t survive if they had too suffer like we do every month.” MJ was true.. Men wouldn’t survive it.

[iridescentides]

i watched the ep twice bc i didnt take notes the first time BUT. hsmtmts 2.04 thoughts under the cut

gina first. my favorite part of the episode was when she admitted that she feels out of place living in someone else’s house and that she wanted a bigger part in the play. i was SO worried they were gonna just let her happily sideline herself in a “yay she learned her lesson about not being the center of attention” kind of way bc i would not be able to handle that two seasons in a row. let her be angry!!! she has a lot to be upset about

the gina/carlos conflict was awful bc theyre making carlos unreasonably annoying this season. last season he was nice, he was enthusiastic, not competitive and just rooting for other people. idk why they needed to flip him so drastically to being spoiled, rich, selfish, pushy, and bitchy. and on top of that i have not been vibing with the pieces of dialogue theyve been giving him this season just to score woke points. its so unbearably obvious that even though hes a brown gay character, he was written by a white gay person who thought, on some level, that he was giving the gen z kids the #hashtag representation they wanted. his delivery of every line that screams “remember, im mexican” is so awkward, it doesnt land well, and im begging them to stop. they want so badly to commodify his character and parade him around as a “look how diverse our show is!” thing and im so so sick of it bc you can tell, with all the surface-level pieces of dialogue, that they dont actually care at all

(”look around, theres not a lot of me at this school” we GET it, this show wants to be glee so bad)

im honestly starting to slowly ship rina less and less. in season one i loved seeing someone make gina happy, especially since she had no friends before opening up to ricky. but now its just a whole mess and i wish she would love herself a lil more to realize that its not worth all this stress. he made a choice and no amount of conflicted moments of eye contact is going to fully take that back. im not necessarily against love triangle plots, but i HATE the whole “women wait around hopefully while male character, whose decisions have already hurt multiple people, makes up his mind” bullshit

that being said, gina handled the situation like a CHAMP, im dying over how quickly she was able to mask her pain and make the joke about the twix bar. im love her

we were absolutely ROBBED of an ej/big red performance this episode!!! i am at my LIMIT we better get gaston next week or i will riot

on the ej train, him not getting into duke was extremely predictable. we all kinda saw that coming and knew that would be his main point of growth this season. im glad they didnt wait super long to do it. now please @ writers i am BEGGING you to give my man more screen time than one scene per episode

its very odd that they keep making mr mazzara have emotionally tough conversations with the students. i will do a parallel gifset of those once the season ends. i liked his convo with ej for the most part, but he really didnt have to beat him over the head with the “youre an emotionless robot” thing again. its clear ej is gonna throw himself into av club or whatever (even though at the end of last season that was supposed to be big red?) and discover that he has a lot going for him. because he does, he literally has everything going for him, thats why they had to make his “problem” not knowing himself. bisexual ej caswell ftw

i love the parallels between ej and nini this episode? i think since the beginning ive felt that there was a lot about them under the surface that was similar. it was interesting seeing ej tell nini about duke first, instead of the obvious choice of ashlyn. i wouldve loved to see how that scene wouldve gone with ricky, gina, carlos, or big red though bc each reaction and attempt at comforting him wouldve been so different. i didnt love that nini had to be pulled away from the conversation, but im glad they can still talk to each other after everything that went down. and i love the juxtaposition of ej’s convo with mazzara directly following nini’s convo with miss jenn bc theyre essentially the same.

speaking of, i loved miss jenn in this episode. her stories are always so funny, but i loved seeing her care so much for nini and guide her, like a teacher. i loved how she pointed out that everyone who loves nini just wants her to be happy

im glad nini is leaving yac bc there was no good way to keep that up honestly. but im pretty annoyed that they were so obvious about it? like, they immediately made it the worst place in the world without exploring it very much. the place is super unrealistic, ive never been to drama school but im sure it wouldnt be like that. no creative arts place for KIDS would be so impossibly limiting. plus the weird bluish coloring in comparison to the nice warm tones of the rest of the show was, again, a dead giveaway. why send her to the school at all if it wasnt even gonna matter?

even though im glad nini left yac, im NOT looking forward to the way miss jenn is about to bend over backwards to put her in the play somehow. she plays obvious favorites and im so annoyed

(sidenote: nini just? decided to leave yac without consulting her parents??? ummm)

granted is a very good song, one of my faves so far

ricky deciding to tell nini he wants her to stay was stupid. what did he think that would accomplish? who in their right mind would drop out of a good school for you?

i loved when nini said yac was missing something, and miss jenn said “ricky” and nini said “you.” that was so so sweet and cute

i think the kourtney/howie thing is gonna grow on me. i hate amatonormativity so im not a big fan of them introducing a whole ass character exclusively so kourtney can have a love interest, but i loved the gesture he made of bringing her the pizzas and her flashcards. i feel like kourtneys love language is acts of service, and she was literally this meme when he did that for her:

i liked seeing ashlyn try to be there emotionally for gina! i want more of them together

overall this episode was okay. not enough songs, and i wish they were spreading out the emotional conversations through the season instead of packing them all into literally one episode, but what we did get was pretty good.

after watching the preview i see that next weeks episode is gonna be about carlos’s party, and i love party episodes. BUT i hope that after that ep we finally get an advancement on the north high stuff! i dont give too many fucks about lily, but i wanna see my son asher angel

[kaazzzyy]

Kengan Omega One shot series : Introduction

Hi, everyone ! 

Sooo, I thought about writing some Kengan Omega stuff and finally came with an idea : making connected one shots with a female reader as she interacts with Kengan’s characters. All one-shots will be posted according into chronogical order and occurs during Omega. I hope you will enjoy them !

(Reader’s name is not defined so you can call her by any name you like. However, her gender and appearence are fixed by myself ! )

Nervousness and anxiety. And maybe a little bit of determination...

That's all what's running through her at this very moment.

Her tiny form is standing in front of the not-so-impresive building she was searching for : The Yamashita Trading Co. Her watering eyes looked down to the paper in her shaking hand.

'There is no mistake... That's the right adress. C-come on (Y/n), the first step is the hardest !', she tought, trying to store some courage before coming in.

Her stress rate made a sudden jump the moment she pushed the door open. nobody was here. She let out a sigh of relief. She examined her surrounding quickly to finally head for the only interesting thing in the ground floor : the stairs.

'Okay... He must be upstairs... Let's go... !'

Climbing the stairs, she immediatly noticed something. Her hands weren't the only things shaking now; her legs started to give her up too. She mentally cursed herself for being such a nervous mess. Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the fading sound of voices coming from upstairs. She stopped for a second, then resumed in making her way upstairs. She was sweating so much, she felt like she was climbing a mountain actually .

She is now standing just before the door where the voices are coming from. She reajusted her red tie, the collar of her white shirt covered by her black three piece suit, to finally tighten the red hair elastic holding up her high ponytail. Then, she knocked on the door.

The voices suddenly stopped. She swallowed. Hard.

She opened the door, nevertheless. Way slower than she would have wanted to.

Three pairs of curious and surprised eyes were instantly on her. She made her best to introduce herself without stuttering.

"H-hi ! I'm (Y/n) (L/n) ! I was told to come and see Mister Yamashita today. Is he here ?"

She failed.

A short uncomfortable silence followed before the second woman in the room spoke up, very politely.

"(Y/n) (L/n) ? He told me about you coming. Mister Yamashita isn't here for the moment. He had an urgent meeting, sorry."

'Hum... Maybe it's my chance to come later so I won't have to stand before so much people but Mister Yamashita...'

(Y/n) tried to ignore the two males looking at her and only focused her attention to the blonde woman.

"Owh, I see ! Hum... So... I will come again later then ? Is it okay ?", she nervously smiled. - "From what he said me you want to join the Kengan Association as a new CEO. I just started telling these young men everything about the Kengan Association and the way it works. Are you interested in joining us in ?", proposed the woman as she reajusted her glasses.

The proposal surprised her but she managed to answer quickly, thanks to her nervousness.

"Y-yeah ! Of course ! Thanks for having me.", she thanked as she closed the door and searched for a chair to sit on. They were no chairs in the room, exept from the ones where the two guys are sitting. Hopefully, she noticed a couch beside the blonde one and took a sit. She did her best to not die from embarassment when she caught the blondie looking at her from aside. She acted like she didnt notice and looked down at her sweating hands.

She finally looked up when the woman started speaking again.

"I'm Akiyama Kaede, Yamashita Trading Co.'s secretary. And these two are Narushima Koga, an apprentice fighter and Gaoh Ryuki, an official fighter. They are both new to the association."

(Y/n) looked at both males and nodded at them with a nervous smile.

"N-Nice to meet you both...!"

Koga nodded at her back while Ryuki answered her, indifferent. "Nice to meet you."

'What a warm welcome...', she tought ironically.

Kaede resumed her speech about the Kengan Association. (Y/n) (L/n) knew some of the things said but she also learned a lot about it. Then came the most interesting part for her : the one about fights and fighters.

'I see... So all the fighters must have been registered with Yamashita Trading Co. to be able to fight in Kengan matches...', she thought deeply, almost not noticing the two other males entering the room suddenly. They greeted Kaede in a very friendly and warm way which made Koga obviously angry as (Y/n) conclued they must have known each other for a long time.

"Allow me to introduce you Himuro Ryo and Kaneda Suekichi. They are both active fighters." - "Pleased to meet you. My name is Kaneda, as she just said.", repeated the closed-eyed smile guy, happily. - "Himuro as a perfect 21 win record in the Kengan matches, and Kaneda is a veteran with 12 matches under his belt."

(Y/n) was looking at them in owe, then focusing on Kaneda. 'So that's how active fighters look like... That one seems pretty fragile tought...'

"Kaede, do you mind if I start now ?", asked Himuro. - "Of course ! Go right ahead !" - "So, like Kaede just said we are both fighters. We are employed by Ginokuniya Bookstore.", he started before turning his attention on Ryuki and smiled, "So, Gaoh, was it ? We saw your match yesterday. You beat Kokuro in your debut match... That's pretty impressive." - "Tch. Condescending ass.", commented Koga.

(Y/n)'s eyes widened as she saw Koga being punched hardly in the face by the white-haired man. She didnt even have the time to process what happened that Ryuki kicked his desk and then threw his chair at him. Himuro dodged the desk, deflected the chair with his arm and finally blocked Ryuki upcoming attack with one hand as his other one was under the boy's chin, menacingly.

"Wait, for real ? He adapted to "that move's blind spot"...!", exclaimed Koga, dumbfounded.

'What is he talking about ? I couldn't see anything ! That was happening so fast !', the girl thought, breathless. If only she knew that Himuro's next question would have made her even more shaken up. She wasn't prepared for what was coming next.

"What did you move to kill Kokuro after the match was over ?", asked Himuro angrily, "Choose your words carefully, 'cause I can still kill you from this distance."

'K-KILL ?!', yelled (Y/n) in her head as she suddenly stood up in surprise.

"You are right, I would have ended up killing Kokuro if Mister Yamashita hadn't stopped me. I just forgot that it was just a "match"... I've only fought in fights to death up until now.", explained Ryuki like it was nothing.

Koga and (Y/n) let escape a sound of surprise as Ryuki continued, "But if you can't kill people in Kengan matches, then I will follow that rule."

Himuro thought for a second before letting go of Ryuki. "It seems like you are not lying."

He then sat down as he explained the reason he was here. Apparently Yamashita asked him and Kaneda to be in charge of their "education". (Y/n) managed to calm down a bit since.

"From this day forth, I'm going to be your mentor. I'm going to make you two into first-rate fighters." - "No, I'm good.", instantly refused Ryuki which made everyone sweatdrop while (Y/n) cracked a smile. The way he said that was way too funny for her.

Now that the situation finally calmed down, Kaneda proposed to Koga to follow him while Himuro did the same with Ryuki. Koga seemed distrusful at first but accepted anyway. On the other hand, Ryuki just walked after Himuro silently.

(Y/n) was now left alone with Kaede. Being alone with her made her way less nervous than she was earlier so she dared to spoke up for once.

"It was the first time I faced such a situation. I think I will have to work about that.", she joked with a small giggle.

Kaede smiled at her. "Indeed ! But don't worry, it's usually way calmer around here." - "I hope so !", she laughed before continuing, "So, do you have any idea when Mister Yamashita will be back ?" - "I have no idea for the moment, i'm sorry. Maybe you can give me your number so I can tell you when he's avaible." - "Oh yeah ! Here's my number..."

Kaede wrote the girl's number on a piece of paper before thanking her and apologizing for the CEO's absence.

"It's okay, don't worry ! He's a CEO so he must be very busy, I can understand that.", she smiled brightly before walking up to the door, "Thanks for all the informations you gave us earlier, it was very interesting. I hope I will get to see you soon. Have a nice day !"

(Y/n) waved at Kaede before going out of the room and closing the door behind her.

'She seems to be a kind and lovely girl.', thought Kaede with a eye-closed smile, 'I wonder what kind of CEO she will become...'

                                     ---------------------------------------------

The next day, (Y/n) received a message from Kaede. She will be able to see Yamashita today at the office. She smiled in front of her phone as she just woke up. She got dressed and took her breakfast before stepping outside with a helmet on. She climbed on her motorcycle and drove towards her next destination.

She lived pretty near from Yamashita Trading Co.'s building but she always enjoyed riding her bike, even for the shortest trip. She arrived soon at the previous day's adress. She parked her bike, put off her helmet, and headed for the first floor just like yesterday.

She was wearing the same outfit as before. She didn't really like dressing formally but she wanted to make a good first impression on people. Besides, it made her looking more professional and credible, some assets she really lacked because of her shyness and her ability to get nervous very easily around people she doesn't know.

"Good morning Mister Yamashita, Miss Akiyama !", greeted (Y/n), entousiastly. She was surprisingly feeling at ease around them already. She met Yamashita briefly once some weeks ago and immediatly noticed how comfortable the atmosphere around him is. He's just so kind, respectul, not intimidating at all... at least for her.

Yamashita's face brighten up at her entrance. "Here you are Miss (L/n) ! I'm sorry for yesterday ! I had a very important meeting and all..." - "No need to apologize, Mister Yamashita !", she reassured with a smile, seeing the man before her getting obviously nervous and embarassed, "It happens ! Besides, Miss Akiyama already told me a lot yesterday and I could even have the chance to meet some active fighters." - "Yeah, that's a unique chance !", he laughed, "I planned to take you to see a real Kengan match soon anyway, so that you can witness how it looks like." - "Really ? That's so nice of you, thanks !"

(Y/n) was now as excited as ever. She didn't know why, but seeing a real Kengan fight is something she was waiting for with impatience.

"But I also have a bad news for you...", continued Yamashita, now a mix of sadness and seriousness on his face.

(Y/n) looked straight at him, growing more and more nervous by the second. "What is it...?"

"You wanted to integrate the Kengan Association as fast as possible as a new CEO, but that won't be possible right now." - "W-why ?", she brutaly asked, unable to prevent her sudden anger to take the upper hand on her usual kind and smiling self. Yamashita reajusted his glasses, "The Association is encountering some serious problems at the moment. However,I will gladly hire you as a new secretary so you can see by yourself how the association works !"

Yamashita smiled silently at her, waiting for her answer. (Y/n) thought for a short time before nodding slowly. "It's with a huge pleasure that I accept your proposition !"

'Anything is better than being in stanby for a non-determined lenght. Besides, being right on the field is a perfect opportunity to learn. Let's do that, yeah. I wonder what are these "problem" he is talking about, tought...'

"So, when will I be starting ?", finally asked the girl, curiously. - "Right now ! If it doesn't bother you, of course ! All this wasn't planned after all." Yamashita scratched the back of his head in embarassment. - "No, I don't mind at all ! I had nothing planned today anyway..."

Yamashita laughed happily as he gave Akiyama some instructions about (Y/n)'s new role in the Yamashita Trading Co. The beautiful woman only nodded silently before looking at the girl.

"Come here, I will show you some data about the fighters and how it works.", offered Akiyama as she sat in front of her computer.

(Y/n) instantly nodded and took a sit next to the blonde secretary and listened carefully to everyword she said.

Yamashita looked at the two females with a slight smile on his face, his expression softening. Having suddenly a few more new people around him made him happy for some reason. Maybe he was starting to feel lonely somehow ? 

Even him didn't know.

[simple-ponderings]

June 24 2020

I remember creating a Qyranian character for my second playthrough on enderal. She was so strong, she reminded me of that Kenyan warrior from street fighter. I was fighting some mad scientist. I was now playing with little plush toys. I felt like a little kid again. I was about to get really into it, but then felt self concious. I was afraid of being judged by other people. Michaels smiling face briefly flashed through my mind.

I remember walking on a path. There were some protruding rocks around. I think I was walking with my mom. I saw two birds sitting on a tree stump. I walked toward them smiling. I wanted to see if theyd befriend me. I held out my hand. The bird back was facing me, the other bird took note of me but made no attempt to fly away. The bird in front of me was green, like a parakeet. I tilted to the side a little and then it came toward me. It hopped right in my hand nibbling and pecking me gently. ''Sorry, I dont have any food," I smiled again. I think another person came by and remarked on how easily the animals came to me. I saw a collie lying there on the ground alone. It came to me and I just remember bringing it home. It looked a bit like a german shepherd too. It was really dirty so we had to give it a good clean. My mom tried brushing its teeth but it started growling at her. I saw its canines, they were all so very sharp and dirty. My mom continued brushing and the dog kept growling. I was afraid it might bite her, but another part of me felt that it wouldnt attack. I took over the cleaning. The collie instantly warmed up to me and became docile. PJ wanted to keep her, but beatrice was against it. We decided to let her back outside. I took her on the leash, and we walked toward an elevator. It was weird. I think it was broken. The collie started pawing urgently at my pants. Id used to be annoyed by something like this, but I wasnt. I couldnt be if I tried. She was trying to tell me.something by the way her paw kept sticking up. "What is it?" I looked up and saw the elevator lid that led to the outside was dangerously hanging loose. I fixed it.

I just remember being at an old beautiful house. It looked so enchanted. It was very dark, and outside looked so mystical. I think my brothers were there, and my sister was doing something. I remember looking out a window and watching a cat walk by. It looked purple and had green eyes. I wanted to catch its attention and say hi but it kept walking. A pug walked by, and then walked up to my window smiling. I waved. I walked outside to meet it. There was another creature that came to me. It looked like the rabbit from winnie the pooh, or rather it reminded me of him. But he was so short, and twiggy. Like...a faerie creature almost. A dryad. There were two trees before me too. I hugged them both as if they were relatives I hadnt seen in a long time. A face appeared on the left one. The face of a male and the other female. The dryad leaned against the left tree. He was saying something about how they dont need to sleep because theyre bodies arent really programmed for it. Time moved differently for them. But I needed to, because of the way my body was. "Hes right you know," the father tree agreed. There were animals wandering around in the background. I looked back at the two trees. The bond I felt with them, I cant really describe it. I was simply apart of them. We shared our essences. A strong link.

I heard a loud thud. I looked up. My sister was dropping things out of the window. She was about to come outside and thought it would be easier to let gravity do half the work. She ended up throwing my laptop down. It broke. I was upset, but the anger didnt consume me like it normally did. I had a leash on it. I controlled it. "You owe me $900." I said furiously. She acted as if that punishment had no effect on her, as if it didnt apply to her. But I knew I would be repaid eventually, so I didnt worry.

I also remember walking through halls. Golden halls made of stone. As if I were in some old yet futuristic city. There was like a highway of something moving beyond gates. I was traveling with companions. Thats all I remember.

I woke up feeling good.

[j4nn4s]

rules:

always repost the rules

answer the questions given to you by the one who tagged you!

give 11 questions

tag 11 people

i was tagged by @isakvdhflorenzi, ty miss lorena <3 1. Is the social media presence of the characters important to how you view the quality of the remake/show?

hm well skam nl is my favorite and their social media game is trash LMAOOO so generally No but i do feel like remakes who DO have such a good presence kind of elevate the show and i think it’s pretty heartwarmin to see some remakes go sm farther than skam with social media and puttin out educational and IN CHARA resources like skames does this so well and i feel like in that way, the team is really really spreadin skam’s spirit via these resources (like joana’s billion bpd awareness ig accounts and lucas rubio’s yt channel)

2. Least favourite clip of the show? Why?

tbh there are definitely some duds but probably one of the clips with sana gettin herself into a hole in s4 just bc some were hard to watch cus cringey or yikes .... idk i cant think of others LMAO

3. Which character did you feel the most connected to and why?

ijeoiqjiwoij even tho even is my all time fave skam chara, i have to say isak for all of these reasons 

4. Your least favourite part of every season?

season 1 - tbh even though i really enjoyed this season, it does take a while for it to build up like i rmr at first not being that interested until ep6 maybe ?? which is hard when you’re trying to get your friends to watch but they have to wait until ep6 before shit starts RLLY buildin up and gettin wild

season 2 - hm ig noora chasin after william ??

season 3 - bro NOTHINGGG call me a purist but its such a refined masterpiece like the pacing is good the characterization is so good ugh i deadass cant think of anythin

season 4 - i always felt a little ??? w noora being sana’s bff ig bc from s1-s3 it didn’t Feel like they were that close like even in noora’s pov, sana wasn’t really a part of it that much ?? like eva was more of noora’s bff ?? so i feel like it would have made more sense if maybe sana spoke more with chris or vilde bc sana and vilde eventually seemed to get closer esp with kosegruppa and chris has always been by sana’s side ?? idk that always confused me

5. What is your opinion on the cast’s participation on social media? Do you prefer it when the cast aren’t that involved like the Skam cast, or do you like a lot of content like the Fr cast do?

tbh i don’t care much abt the casts LMAOOO if anythin it kind of brings more harm as seen with the harassment axel and maxence get and also can bring more controversy like with irene (which honestly is p sad considerin how much i love skames bc now i feel super :/ watchin it like she shouldve just had private accts at this point)

6. Favourite song you found from Skam or the remakes?

OMFGGG love this question .... def doorman by slowthai and mura masa bc its one of my fave songs now and i got it from skam nl <3 ugh taste

7. If you could decide which characters from Skam got a season, who would you choose?

OOOHHH ugh torn bc i like isak’s pov but also i want even’s so might have to forfeit isak season for even season ....... hm so probs vilde, sana, even, noora (maybe not w william tho) and honestly maybe jonas too ??

8. Are there any moments that you liked in the show that everyone else seems to hate?

IJXDWQOIJJ yes .... remakes-wise, people hate skam nl s2’s last half but i enjoyed it for the most part ... i think the pacing was off for the last ep but personally, clip 50 made up for it and is p god tier imo ..... and also don’t think the first half of ep10 is enough to discredit the entire season bc i rlly loved seeing liv’s pov and have sm fave moments from the season 

but skam wise, omg might get a lil controversial w this one IM SORRY !!! im bein honest and its Just my opinion ok 

personally s2 got me more invested than s1 and i don’t think its a super bad season like i didnt really say many problems wrong with it until i got on tumblr wiejioqjoiqjq i was sort of interested in the questions that the noora/william dynamic brought up which is, as expressed in william’s war speech to noora, that nothing is ever black/white which i feel was a huge message and feeds into the ‘you never know what ppl are going through’ theme of the season ... like i like the idea of someone like noora, who can have a black/white mentality (as seen in the first clip of s2 when she tells vilde that they can’t have the tannin company as their sponsor bc they objectify women or smth but misses the context and what it could mean for the bus monetarily bc shes caught up in bein ‘woke’) having to break out of that and see more than one side ... and i think remakes like skam austin expanded on this idea well like when zoya was like ‘must be so nice being right all the time’ which i Do feel like is an important for youth to know today .... bc i think its so easy to get caught up in the idea of being so objectively right and morally superior that people lose sight of the more nuanced characteristics to life ... (omg long ramble BUT)

also LMAOOOOO this one might be more controversial as it pertains to bench scene s4 ok oops again doNT GOTTA AGREE !! ........ but i feel like the scene had a lot of good intentions ... i was def kind of cringing a bit tho bc i understand the subject’s sensitivity and how these topics are hard to talk about but i genuinely feel like they both made Some points and should listen to each other .... like as Hard and as maybe ‘unwoke’ it is to admit, unfortunately you sort of do have to answer the tough questions bc that way we learn from each other .... and i perfectly understand why some ppl wouldn’t want to do this and i certainly am tired abt havin to answer shit abt my sexuality or stupid male questions abt women but if u dont answer them, people do go lookin for answers still and the internet is such a shitty place that its pretty easy (esp with youtube’s algorithm) to lead you to ignorant ppl and perhaps radicalization .... questions help us to better understand our community and sometimes they can have good intentions too but we have to ask and answer them or else people will make up answers (which ive literally seen and its honestly worse to see fake as shit and UNINFORMED answers bc ppl did not want to ask you or ppl of ur identity, esp when they’re already startin from a place of hate .... but i rather have ppl ask me patronizing questions than have them spread false info bc that can do much more harm in the long run) however i DO think that isak should also consider sana’s side and i sort of wish we saw him conceding more bc they both have smth to learn from one another, like sana shouldn’t just be learnin from isak, isak needs to learn from sana too

PHEW SORRY QWIOJQWIO girl i just got opinions on some things this is when my desc rlly comes in handy .... oqjdwqioj

9. What did you learn from the show?

omg honestly too much to write here tbh ..... but if it says anythin im (very slowly) in the works of a three part skam essay about basically how skam teaches us to be better humans and how to better treat the people we care about diowjqioj essentially the three biggest themes of the show: you never know what someone is going through so always be kind, always communicate with your friends, and no person is ever alone and i feel like these are definitely rlly good messages to live by (also livet er nå BITCH !!!)

10. What is your favourite headcanon about your favourite characters?

omg tbh i could not tell u at all how the skam charas are doing except i hope even is okay thats all im thinkin of ok .... OIWXIOJX omg remakes wise tho ..... honestly im so bad at this girl IDK !!!!! LMAO i have to really think i have a bit of vdh and dutch even but thats bc we know like Zero abt them so its easier oijwiojqio idk liv and noah bein cute as shit ..... OH WAIT personally i feel like janna got a bunch of pansexual energy so my BIGGG hc is that she’s pan also bc she’s one of my all time fave charas and my fkn url so itd be dope if she was pan ok boom

11. What is your opinion on fanfiction in the fandom?

tbh i don’t read skam fanfiction but i don’t mind reading some from the remakes (tho still its rare) ... eiojeioqw i just don’t trust anyone but julie to write skam charas bc i think that’s how precious the show is to me LMAO like idk everything ive seen of skam fanfiction and ficlets and one shots, i could never get into bc the tone is just so out of character or there will be lines that just take me out of the fic bc im like this !!!! is not !!! how the chara acts !!!! so yeah idk not rlly a fan bc of my purist ass but i dont mind others reading it

Questions:

1. Favorite quote of the show?

2. Which country would you like to see have the next remake? Do you have any headcanons?

3. Which season would you rewrite and how would you rewrite it?

4. What clips do you personally like or don’t mind, but others hate?

5. Which songs do you think SKAM or the remakes should have included? For which moments?

6. Who would you give SKAM season five to and what topics and themes would it cover?

7. What moment spoke to you or touched you from SKAM the most?

8. How did you find SKAM? How did you feel about it right after watching?

9. Have you shared SKAM with any friends in real life? What did they think of it?

10. Of the remakes, which characters are your favorite of their SKAM counterparts? (Ex. who is the best Vilde remake? Eva? etc.)

11. How do you feel about the SKAM (and remakes) tumblr fandom?

I tag: @smileykeijser @whatadaze @queenofpurgatoryx @itlukey @skamyeets @shaykeijser @megeliz01 @isakcijser @wackpainterkid @axelauriantblot @kar-d-momme

(omg ik some of yall have been tagged so just ignore if u dont want to do it ok im srry it was in the RULES!)

[jerek]

[[MORE]]

i mean for gods sake in canon garrosh calls sylvanas a bitch and implies shes no different than the lich king but in my version she was killed by a misogynistic warlock, literally demonized after her death, and mourned in a Cringy but to my younger self quietly poignant scene by a version of garrosh that only truly comes into her femininity in remembrance and admiration for the woman who she feels alienated from in both nature and values but also spent so much time with, giving an honest ear to her cruel, world-taught views.

I mean for gods sake how did i write this. I accidentally wrote Garrosh as a nonbinary lesbian with a crush on a homophobic woman. Half of what i just detailed was a metaphor for things I would later go on to experience.

And i know this was some lesbian shit because it didnt end there. My version of garrosh was a physically imposing masculine lesbian, but she herself had an alternate version.

The alternate version was smaller, more normatively feminine, and drawn as an animal. In some branches of the story, she’s a reincarnation of the main lesbian garrosh, in a world where everyone else is reincarnated as a symbolic animal version of themselves, but in the main branch she never spoke, never interacted with anyone, and haunted Nagrand like a ghost.

Also let me talk about Nagrand. Fucking nagrand. When she got there is when the REAL feminist theory started. There were three main plot points.

1. it was revealed here that sylvanas lived on in a sort of afterlife. Not the empty blank void that Blizzard sent their favorite misogynist caricature to, to reflect the way they wrote her, but a dreamlike world that floated between the lines of the universe’s rulebook— surrounded by a perpetual rose-gold haze.

Sometimes it was a grassy floating island, with a single tree and a little pool of water, sometimes it was a modern driveway and a street and a park based on my own neighborhood, and then.

Sometimes they’d travel to the furthest edge of the afterlife, and there would be no great gate. Instead, there would be a silver strip, like a metal tightrope, and Sylvanas would walk her down it on their tiptoes, with only one of each woman’s arm extended for balance because the opposite hands were holding each other.

it was a dreamlike world, and until she gave up her life and met her there, she could only ever dream of it.

2. She did, eventually.

it was for garrosh. not my female version, because she had a different name that i would randomly change, but the male garrosh, the canonical garrosh, the garrosh who was meant to escape into the timeline she found herself accidentally in.

she saw him as a big brother, but at the same time, not. he was worse than her, and she knew that, but much like sylvanas it itched in the back of her brain that she could change him, that she could show him a new way like anduin tried to, that if this giving calm existed in her it surely rested dormant in garrosh.

because after all, like a nb lesbian and her favorite male character, she and garrosh were the same person.

garrosh was killed, and she sought revenge. wielding two axes— her own, and that of garrosh, she strode up to thrall and thrust her heart to the sky as she was struck down.

she went to the afterlife, and there sylvanas would sleep atop her chest, under the tree.

3. but before that…

you know how i joke about anduin being a lesbian??

i also used to have a virulent hatred for varian, from my version of anduin— another extended metaphor, this time for how neurodivergence affected my school life and my online life back in 7th grade.

and anduin snuck off.

almost every other day, he’d sneak off; sometimes to the animal world, where instead of being reincarnated he emerged from a dark, underground labyrinth in elwynn to a world that had never heard the words “prince of stormwind”— and unknowingly, he emerged transformed into a wild, half-maned feline.

sometimes to nyalotha, where he could rest, where he could recover, where in a single psychic scream he could eliminate the pull of duty and become not what he perhaps should have been, but what he was nonetheless happy to turn into.

sometimes back to veiled stair, sometimes he would burn the valley of four winds in his black-hole suspicions— he would drink too much of something shadowy purple— and he would sleep well knowing High Queen Proudmoore would understand that though destruction is a choice, one far easier than creation, sometimes the only real choice is whether to do something stupid or just stand by.

but this time, it was him and my version of garrosh. him, and her, and varian back in stormwind.

and he would ask her— why?

she would be silent, and keep bandaging his wounds from the local wildlife. they would heal eventually.

but he wasn’t the only insane, stupid one around. like a child younger than himself, sometimes she would leave their makeshift tent, and sit in the bushes, and sulk.

does it matter, one dream showed me her asking; my thinking, if it only lasts a moment?

he didn’t understand yet, but this wasn’t the branch where he ran from the same problem— a mix of his upbringing and the failures of his brain.

she would ask— “if i feel nothing for any longer than a few minutes,” in a tone i eventually thought betrayed who she was meant to represent— “how do i know that this momentary despair, this momentary rage even matters?”

“does it matter why, if i can do good only because i forget so often my evil nature?”

she would plead— smite her, burn a hole through her eyelid as was done to sylvanas, and remove what makes her this way. what makes her any way.

perhaps when she was redeemed, honorable by both orc and human standards, she would allow herself to die.

only one tear a night fell from my version of garrosh, and though they were both unstable, anduin learned from her. she was his mentor, his aunt, his idol, and his replacing parent.

when the si:7 found him, he was alone. he was scratching in his sleep at reddened pustules around old wolf-bite scars she had helped to close, and they took him back. as they do in every branch where he survives, by trap or by net or by silent cooperation.

through the fevers, he traveled back to stormwind. through the nausea, he embraced his father.

relishing the pain of red pox all over, pain body-wide that had never let itself exist without hellscream, he stabbed his father in varian’s own throne room.

this is how it must end with wrynn kings.

he didn’t know whether the guards slew him or arrested him. he saw only a thin strip of silver, splitting the evening sky, and knew soon he would be there with the woman he felt was truly worthy of being his family.

he experienced what she did. the weight on his heart, closing his throat as he tried to get people to see why he does what he does— why he sees the world the way he does, why it doesn’t mean he’s just a naive idealist waiting patiently for reality to beat it out of him. why it doesn’t make him stupid.

being haunted by himself. the dark face of the moon she was to him was small, and spindly, and though it was striped, unlike a lion, it wore a thick, soft mane from the top of its head down to its chest. he didn’t think the dead could laugh, but here he was— because what stalked him wherever he went was so much like her. big, and strong, and when he was alone daydreaming instead of performing for the crown, he imagined it free from the alliance.

dreaming of what could be. even with his own garrosh, he felt a familiarity that ate at him— how deep and warm his voice, how bright his eyes, how quick his temper— and how breakable he felt, from the moment his father woke every morning, to that moment in draenor where he saw another towering figure in solid stance, with hair long and tied, stare down at him and ask— who are you?

and with her, he could answer that.

i am what i am, he would tell her, the moment his soul untangled from his form, and there are no words in my language to describe me.

except for one, if his new mother would see fit— if orcish surnames could pass the grave he might feel around him were he able to move.

she had once called herself garrosh, because she thought she was him.

now, though it would take courage, as all things seemed to take when done her way— he would ask if he was a hellscream yet.

honorable to orcs and humans alike.

[erosjeon]

Kalopsia

Pairing: Hybrid!Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Fluff & Smut

Summary: You walk into your home one day to find your cat walking on two feet, in a human form.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

Words: 2.5k

You kicked the door shut after trying your best to get it opened with your unavailable hands that carried the heavy groceries. With a grunt you managed to reach for your cross body and throw it over the couch while making your way to the kitchen to put down and organise all the things you bought.

You had a simple life, a twenty years old girl who’s trying to make a living in this cruel world. Your parents had passed when you were young and ever since then you had to make your own money, be it from taking extra shifts at the cafè you worked in to working at McDonald’s where you used to visit when your parents were alive and wonder why people wanted to work there when most of the customers were absolute garbage and the atmosphere is unforgiving and suffocating. You had come to the realisation that those people didn’t have a choice because after all you had bills and a degree to pay for.

You would describe yourself single, you and your boyfriend broke up about a year ago, you would be really upset and heart broken if he wasn’t a douchebag and a selfish piece of shit or maybe because you only dated for a few months and realised he wasn’t the one for you.

You would say that you’re living in this apartment alone but you had a cat, a male adorable Scottish fold with the fluffiest fur ever. He was the only thing keeping you going through your hard times, he would always come and rub his head onto your feet when you arrive home, he always wanted your attention and would would beg and purr for your pettings just like he is now.

You crouch down to run your fingers through his adorable ears with the biggest smile sprawled onto your face, you can never help it when he looks at you like that. Only if a real man can actually look at you like this.

“Hi Kookie” you said while stretching each syllable out of adornment.

“How have you been? Were you being a good boy?” You said while peppering his fur with kisses near his ear and neck which earned you a lot purr and a lick from him.

Your cat wasn’t the typical cat that scratched at its owners if they touched him or pet him too much, yes he would get fiesty sometimes but most of the time he was peaceful and understanding. When you cry, you would find him at your lap looking as sad as you or dragging a toy in your direction in hopes that if you see him play around attend to your commands that you would feel mused and feeling better. You swore that he’s not a normal cat.

You carried him in your arms after organising everything in place. You headed to your room and put him into your bed where you would walk to your wardrobe to get a change of clothes. You took of your shirt followed by your bra, you didnt need to be suffocated at home wearing these merciless boob imprisonment outside was bad as it is, you put your head and arm through your tank top and changed your jeans into your matching pyjama shorts.

You liked to lay down in bed and pet your cat when you came back from a long day in attempt to gather a bit of energy to get up and try to make dinner. Kookie must be starving yoi thought as you patted at your lap to get your cat to come to you, which he obviously did you could swear that he liked being there maybe a little too much. You didn’t like your cat eating processed smelly canned food that they scam people with at the market, when you first got your cat 7 years ago, you didn’t have much money to get him special cat food and you would feed him whatever you were eating which he actually found much better than canned food that you bought for him when you finally earned money, he refused to eat it and you decided to never feed him it again.

“Sometimes, I wish you can speak to me” you said while rubbing his right ear between your thumb and pointer, he liked it the best when you petted his sweet tiny ears like that.

“I just feel silly when I speak about my day for hours when you probably can’t understand anything I’m saying apart from the word food” you laughed at yourself. Strangely your cat growled and it almost sounded like a scoff, did you just offend your cat?!

“Sorry. But you know im going to talk about my day either way” you shot him a sweet smile. He settled his head between his stretched paws that laid on your stomach.

“I… I think I’m going to quit” you said slowly. You didn’t expect your cat to understand the kind of world you live in. You are a hard working person but you can barely manage doing notes for class when you had two jobs like that, besides neither paid well for the long hours you worked. You though of quitting your job at McDonald’s because it was tough and was a complete crap of a job and the shifts you worked could spare you an entire night that you can use studying or maybe in the future, spare that time to work for someone who pays well.

“I’m just tired you know? I feel like my brain cells are dying when I work there. The people treat you so horribly, when I work late at night and go to clean the dirty tables I get groped and it feels disgusting. The smell is disgusting and I dont even comment on how bad the food  we sell it. I feel so bad for selling people something that will reduce their life span” you sighed.

“I guess I really had enough, huh?” You said while picking up his left ear and massaging his head. The cat infront of you seemed to have understood you and gave you a pity look, which had quickly changed to what you could make out as annoyance and anger. Why are cats so weird yet absolutely beautiful.

“I guess it’s queue for dinner” you cheered,

“Grilled chicken? Or that salmon I just bought from the market baby?” You asked as if your cat would answer. You knew he would probably like salmon better and honestly, you were craving some salmon and a good beetroot salad.

The cat had followed you to the kitchen when the smell of fish showered your entire home. Of course you thought, what a typical cat he is. You noticed as he gets closer to you as you grill the salmon on the hot surface, he had wrapped your calf with his tail while looking up to you which made you squeal at his cuteness but remembered how dangerous it is for him to be close to an oven.

“I love you Kook but you have to go away, it’s dangerous here” you said before reaching for the fridge and taking out the rest of the ingredients necessary for the dish.

You had spent the rest of the night eating your dinner and watching a movie play on your TV with your beloved cat. You were feeling pretty tired and chose to end your night after emailing your boss at McDonald’s not to expect you at work anymore, you finally chose to quit but you weren’t sure if you were ready for the consequences. It’ll be okay, you whispered to yourself before shutting your eyes and brain to sleep.

The next morning, you woke up before he did like any other normal day. You headed to the bathroom and got ready to get ready for your classes, you would normally make food in the morning and put it down in a bowl so that when your cat is hungry it can eat while your not home, but as you quit your job at McDonald’s, today consisted of going to classes and coming back home early.

You made some coffee and put down a small breakfast for your cat incase it woke up before you got home but you doubted it since you’re going to come back within 3 hours and he’s showing no sign of wanting to get up any time soon. Smiling, you wore your winter coat and wrapped your neck with your favourite soft scarf and headed outside to start your day.

Classes were the same, difficult but manageable with effort anf effecient note taking, which you clearly havent done enough of. You didn’t make friends with the people that are in your course because you simply didnt have enough time to, but they all seemed somewhat nice you guessed.

Once the class was over you had a small break before the other one begins and you headed to the local university cafe for some coffee in attempt to really wake up. You waited in the queue to order your coffee, it was only one man with a slightly grey hair in front of you. You assumed he was one of those obnoxious frat party boys who dyed their hair a different colour every weekend. You rolled your eyes when you heard him ordering the same drink you were going to.

“Hi. Can I get a caramel machiatto please?” You asked of the barista, who nodded and asked for your name and the money, which of course you had given before you proceeded to wait for your drink. You had realised that the man in front of you was gone, that was quick you said before taking the drink that was placed on the table in front of you, that had said caramel machiatto on it.

You had sipped some before the same man reappears infront of you. Why was he here you said before turning away, only to hear your name and the drink you ordered being called out by the barista.

Fuck.

You turned around, and met the man again but this time, he was facing you and dear God, he was gorgeous. So unreal that you’d think he was an anime character. And you might have embarrassed yourself by taking his drink.

“Sorry, i thought you took your drink and left and I didn’t bother to check the name on the cup” you said shyly.

He took the drink placed on the table and turned it around before sipping it.

“No worries. Y/N” he said. He knew you?

“Um… Do I know you” you said confused.

“If that was a pick up line… You could do much better” he chuckled.

“Ahh.. not that. Its just you knew my name and I’m not much of a social person is all” you laughed as crismon stains your cheeks. You weren’t sure if you said that out of confusion or admiration and wanting to keep talking to him.

“The cup says your name” was all he said before giving you a smile.

“Right! Sorry again” you said,

“No problem at all” he said, before you left the cafe and continued to your class.

You were on your way home after that incident and you were smiling like a fool. At least we go to the same university, we’ll probably meet again, you thought. You didn’t know that this was not the only unexpected thing to happen today because as you turned the lock of your home open, you were met with a naked man.

“What the fuck?!” You screamed after taking in the scene right infront of you.

He wasn’t just one naked man, no he had what appears like cat ears and a fluffy long tail that you can mistake as your cat’s. You didn’t dare to look down and met his eyes, he was clearly as freaked out as you are, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. The more you looked into his eyes the more they resembled your cat’s that you stare hours in every night. You can never mistake any detail regarding your cat but this? This is insane!

“What are you doing in my house?!” You tried to be calm, not knowing how to deal with this situation. Was he a pervert with some strange kink, going to peoples homes and freaking them out like that?

“You’re home early” he said with a shrug, his voice sounding like the sweetest melody. When you fathomed what he just said you took a step back in shock. What the hell was that.

What?

“Who are you?!” You tried to stay calm and collected.

“Really Y/N? You can’t tell how your cat looks like?”

What?

“Thank God you found out this way, I was getting tired of having to stay in that stupid cat form and eat out the small bowl you would put my food in” he said annoyed.

This is not your cat. The man in front of you is definetly someone mental.

“If you think I’m gonna believe this then your out of your fucking mind” you retaliated.

He moved forward towards you before he shut the door forcefully and pinning you on it. He smirked before saying

“I can make you believe me”

He took your hand and placed them on the familar ears, they felt and looked just like your cat’s. You couldn’t help but rub them and the man in front of you leant towards your hand and purred.

You couldnt deny the fact that this pretty much is your actual cat in human form. All the memories of appearing naked and changing clothes in front of him rushed in your mind. You smacked your self mentally and stayed away from Jungkook. Yeah that was the name you had given your cat that you’d usually call Kookie.

“Why are you running away from me now?”, he said confused.

“Why didn’t you tell me you’re human” you ignored him.

“Because im not” he said as if it was obvious.

“You know what I mean. You’re a hybrid, same thing” you said sighing.

“Because like you are now, you’ll distance yourself from me” he looked down, all the smug that was on it disappeared. You sighed again, you’d never leave your cat. He was your life and you’ve even wished that he could talk to you. Your wishes had come true.

“Kookie” you said before making your way to him, his ears perked up and so did his head in attempt to look at you.

“I’d never leave you. You know that” you said as you took your fingers to push through his ears like you always do. He purred again and placed his arms around your waist while he rubbed his head into your chest.

“I-I always wanted to do this… have you between my arms instead of the usual way around” he said and you smiled.

“I do feel weird about it, but I could get used to it” you smiled.

A/N: Part 2 is out now

[dromjournal]

The Alternative Routes

17 January 2018

*I* (main character, not really any hints of features, likely male or male presenting) goes to the house of a sibling/close friend who lives at farmlands at the bottom of a big hill covered in woods. There is a small house next to a river that goes across the landscape, having bridges both at the road and by the house. The big road takes off straight left to the house at the bottom of the hill. I’m going there to train some bunnies I think? I go down the big road, saying hello to some locals that seems to manually be digging out the grounds for a new house on the hill - the community here is small and tight knit. A little later down the road I meet a woman 30-40s arranging wooden boards for the house, and I talk to her a little. She say she is impressed by the young man building the house all by himself and she had always wanted one but didnt think it was possible, so she felt like she should help him for taking this step and showing them its possible. I go with her to the school that lies close to there, saying hi to some kids I know and because she is picking up her daughter. It becomes clear here that the inhabitants of this village have psychic powers that are kinda special for their bloodlines, thinking I am super weird being an adult that can’t do it. Anyway we pick up her daughter and she (here I get the feeling she is not a lot younger than me at all at like 14 but yeah its a bit hard to get a feeling of my character) is going to show me the way as she is also going down the hill, the mother going back to helping with the house. We hit it off and its a nice walk. At almost the bottom I see some kind of large clock in the distance (like on a church tower), but it doesnt seem to work right, and point it out. She grows silent at this and kinda confused, then distressed, before starting to kinda burn and spit fire everywhere and finally going up in flames completely, leaving only ashes left. I dont dare to touch her, Im just panicking. Not sure what to do and with no phone or anything I continue down to my brother to get help. But when I get there soon after my brother is acting very strange, hysteric almost, and there’s a bunch of people there that are suggested I know kinda closely. My brother refers to all of us by like, online gaming handles, and I think that’s how we all know each other. Then he appears happy to finally get to do his “game”, standing us out on the big road asphalt bridge as were all confused. He explains it like this: He is going to be hunting the rest of us down, trying to kill us. The rest of us are to hide and try to get the upper hand. The sweetest person in the group is given a gun, and another person is taken hostage by holding a large knife against his neck to make sure well go through with it. The rest of us have no kind of defense, so the gun is both a reason to turn on each other and kill each other. Only one person is coming out alive. Some Battle Royale shit. The nice person jumps into the river to get away, but then so does my brother, disappearing under the dark water. You can then tell nice dude is getting stabbed multiple times despite the water being dark. People start running in fear. I somehow turn on my own power, my head hurting and heart racing. I don’t know what I’m doing as I somehow jumps back in time to get over this.

A pale skinned girl stares at me, confused at the face I am making. It’s the girl/daughter from before. We have taken another way and are going through the forest this time. We are still on our way down and for the second time I notice the broken clock. Then boom, the girl go up in flames this time too. However due to the foggy ground she doesn’t burn entirely, and you can still tell there’s a body. Still having no better solution, I do as I did the last time and leave to continue down the hill. But this time the mother had walked after us after a while and she finds her girls dead body, thinking she was killed. She goes into a rage, flying basically down to kill every single person at the bottom, basically burn everything to the ground. I had just gotten to the bottom this time as I hear her coming, but as we had walked inside the forest I wasn’t at the house. She’s much faster, immediately going to the house and acres to burn everything like a big dragon-ish. I notice people in the forest not too far from where I am and I walk over there, where I meet up with brother and a bunch of others while they attempt to escape up the hill. They had gotten away by going into the stream and following the water. It turns out they (and me!) are some kind of forest pixie-creatures, not really powerful in any way but it’s still a magical thing. Aka we are not in a human realm at all, which kinda explains some things. Unfortunately the dragon-mom have noticed some people and comes over, burning the entire forest to the ground in big fireballs. My brother are running with two younger kids, but we are pretty far up. She is rapidly approaching - and her fire comes before she does. We all hide under some shit, saving us from the fire and hoping she’ll just continue past us. She goes past me without stopping, but as she gets to my brother she swoops down and kick him out of hiding, blaming him for her daughters death. I then jump out of my own hiding, yelling at her that it was me who did it. I tell her exactly what happened, and she is sad. She is no longer on fire, rather looking really gloomy and cold. After I’m done telling her she says she just wishes I had gone back and told her what happened right away with sad sad eyes, and then she leaves. I rewind time again, set on getting it right. This time I never mention the clock, instead tries to keep the girls attention off it. She makes it down the hill and parts with me without catching on fire :) I walk to my brothers house, where things are strange and tense. My brother acts aggressive but haven’t tried to kill anyone, so I consider that progress. Scared still he’ll hurt my bunnies directly or indirectly (by leaving them in their cages while killing me) I take them to the woods, trying to help them dig a burrow before releasing them so they will have somewhere to escape. While digging I run into a pixie, being a little annoyed I’m digging for some reason. I follow him, which makes him anxious, because he very obviously tries to get inside a door without me noticing that appears out of nowhere but seems to have a set time before it disappears again. I ignore him and walk right in while he protests. Inside there is a lot of peopleish looking pixies that run around. There’s seems to be one in charge, sitting around on something like a throne, greeting me like they’ve been expecting me. This is apparently a collection of minor gods living here in what do looks like a windowless house, and so are we though we are even more minor being stuck in one realm. There is a fox following me from the moment I stepped inside here, but it’s not actually an animal so much as my own curiosity in the shape of a fox, and they tell me I should feed it or it will run away from me. They seem pleased to have me there. I follow it down some empty stairs to what looks like a hallway and the actual front door of this place. I open the door and look outside at entire worlds passing by, seeing hundred of tiny blue shiny “strings” being pulled from me in different directions and different planets. I realize that every second I spend on this ~ship~, I create a thousand splintered realities, somehow leaving my DNA footprint across the universe and possibly having a billion babies or something. I make the decision to jump out just as I see all strings suddenly weave together in one again and follow it out of the ship. My reality is back to what it was “supposed” to be with one stable string and I am back at the top of the mountain - but now things are devoid of colour or nuance, everything is black and white. (Not grayscale, I’m talking black or white.) As I get down this time and meet my brothers eyes it hits me that this is exactly what have happened to my brother too and that’s why he’s like that. He was splintered and despite jumping off, his soul was now falling apart. He could only see the black or white. Nothing looked pretty to him in the world anymore. He saw the world from the eyes of a god but the mind of a human. (Also a lot more time than I expected had passed, a couple of years at least.) I rewind once again. This time I rewind back to when my brother first arrived. Turns out there was three other people that had arrived with him, but they had kinda left him as he got hurt. One of them, his girlfriend, had been taken by some kind of creature in the trees and he asked me to get her back because he still loved her even if she left him. The creature was basically just hugging her so tight she couldn’t move, swinging from tree to tree. I did somehow get her free, but it was apparent she wasn’t herself anymore as she immediately tried to hug a hold of something. I woke up around here though. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[ubereyezconfessions-blog]

2/8/19-2/9/19 Riders

#ThemToo

I dont want to assume it, But I seriously think I over heard my passengers speak on being raped. Its not a far trip at all, but i assume they were talking about it prior to getting in the car. But they get in, the first of the two ladies that are in the trip, finishes a story. But its a story of having nights were shes went out, and got blacked out drunk. Im already thrown off because Im more sober than I aint. But she continues. A story of being drunk, having to be carried on a mans shoulders cause she wanted to get into another club. Saying she woke up with bruises and her friends said she was “fighting a curb”. Even at one point of being black out, she was told that a cop approached her friend and asked if she was alright and couldnt get into clubs being that intoxicated and not being able to walk. And having to be took home and tucked in.

Now heres where things gets bizarre. The next girl begins her story. Begins with telling that shes had her experience with blacking out. But slips that she thinks she was drugged and the other girl thinks the same for herself. She runs on with a story that her friends did it to her. That they got her “fucked up”, blacked out to the point where she wasnt coherent of what was going on. To where her “friends” used her credit card and ran up a $500 dollar bill on a credit card of hers. Took her car and left her stranded, even as far as throwing her luggage out with her. Woke up with bruises and the thought that she was drugged cause couldnt remember any of it. At this point she says she at a airport and calling her parents that she had a crappy relationship with to save her. Back and fourths and being stranded without a clue of how to get out the situation. And at no expense her parents did get her out of it. Said that her “friend” was there the whole time and she knew the people they were with were sketchy but she was around them. According to her, she was drugged, beat, and I can only hope that the worst thing in mind didnt happen. But at many points on her trying to get through the airport and home, many people told her to get to hospital which she never did.

In my head, as fucked up as it is, I knew what kinda happened just with my upbringing. Basically her friend got to know her and behind her back probably hated that she probably never had a want that wasnt met. Of course sucks to assume, but these were white women that probably didnt come from homes where money was an issue. But the characters she was around more than likely did. So they probably used her for her money and the sketchy characters were probably in the other womans ear having her play the role til they could make that night happen, or even being the mastermind to it all. You dont get drugged in a house of friends without some inside job happening.. Of course thankfully shes alive and all good today. But what a story to overhear. These women were speaking on potentially being assaulted like it was a run of the mill thing.

Perhaps Im not aware of just how dark the human can be, or I just have such a respect and awareness for another human that I cant fathom hurting another or taking advantage when things can just happen if you let them fall in your lap.

Succubus

Which brings me to my next story which is a polar opposite. And that is 4 lustful women that couldnt just admit what they wanted. Which i find these cases very funny and this was actually a first that was an ego boost. So this trip takes place in Long Beach-Huntington Beach borderlines. Its some 80′s rock night so you can guess the crowd attending. All american lol. But anyways, I pull up and a group of women approach the car. This Blonde that ordered the ride and led the pack, She approached the car with this look in her eye that was filled with lust. I can only assume they dont see many young black males around those parts. (Im learning America isnt as intergrated as it preaches). So they all get in, greetings follow. And they start getting ditzy. But its a smooth ride, were Its ever so obvious the blonde is diggin me. Yet, As im learning, younger women dont express their wants or attraction while. As in my story with “The Cougar”, Im very aware that if a woman wants you, she will let you know. Lifes too short for all this thats happening in this ride. But anyways, so in the backseat are her friends, which Im assuming are the cockblocks and overseers of if their friends go home with anyone when they go out. But she kinda narrates the trip. And with this running need for a toothbrush to spend the night at her friends. Which brings up this conversation where the blonde states she has a toothbrush for her. To which we all have a laugh because it sounds rather bizarre that she just has toothbrushes to give out to guest. And then she ask me would I find it creepy if a woman had a toothbrush for me if I stayed over. Which kinda felt like a indirect way of asking me to stay over. But not being bluntly stated, no bite on my end. I tell her that yeah it could be weird but its all on context. To then this point her friend begins talking about she needs vitamin D and a facial mask of some sort. If you ask me, she meant some very sexual things. But once again, not bluntly stated - no bite. Even with the toothbrush conversation that same girl told that blonde, “dont sound like such a hoe”. Which reviewing the trip, its obvious that this is something that isnt out the normal of these chicks. Which among being a good ego boost. Kinda glad I didnt pursue anything thrown out there with any of them. Even more a nod of the right choice, the chicks went from plans on going home to another bar, which it was a little after 12am-ish then. So about a hour and change to drink before last call, or rather find someone with vitamin D and a face mask lol.

All-Americans

This is a very quick trip but a conversation on hindsight that makes me go “hmmm”. Anyways this is directly after the prior trip with the Succubus. And I pick up 3 white guys in Long Beach, like 2nd street where its nothing but bars and nightlife. Im aware of the area being at the beach with an ex near there. Which riding through, it kinda hit me that she probably spent times there for her experience of the nightlife which give her awareness of the beach there. But anyways im going to the pick up with “This Is America” playing. Obvious what that is, if youve ever watched the video or heard it. But I pick them up and its the greets. The guy that sits passenger is the only one talking. The other two or weirdly quiet or maybe offended because with the rate the first guy got in, I only got a introduction to him before they jumped in the back and it was probably a quick “whats up” or something. But anyways we hit the light to turn thats maybe 2 blocks away. So they notice a bar across the street and speak on how packed it is. Which i myself was wondering why this bar had a line to get in it when its many bars in the whole street that didnt. Part of me recognized it was a urban crowd, but it slipped out my mouth that I didnt understand why people wait that long to get in a bar. Which its approaching 12:30am and some of them wouldnt get in til 1am and then it leaves 30 minutes for that. Which the passengers say, “not worth it, right?”. To which I agree. Hindsight i feel he meant its dumb of urban folks to go to bars and wait around for that we just saw. So then he starts asking me am I from the area and i tell him Im from LA. Then he ask where in LA do i visit, bar wise. To which i tell him I just spend my time at home and working that job. To which he calls me a Iron Introvert and then he ask me this really urking question when I look back. “Do you read?”. I chuckled but in my mind im thinking, who the hell doesnt read. Or perhaps he wasnt used to people like me reading. To which he goes in on if ive ever heard of David Goggins. to which he calls a introvert that does crazy shit. amongst the accolades he preaches he tells me about his book. and I ask him whats it about. So he tells me about his growing up and he started with “he grew up in indiana and he was the only...”. Didnt finish the sentence, which i knew exactly what he was gonna say but I was gonna let him say it. So he explains first that his dad had a roller rink and was the first black man to start a business there or thriving business i suppose. Which he abused his son with a lot of beatings. But he becomes who he is and is the only black in the vicinity or that he spoke on. The guy was fascinated by him but kinda was a obvious observations that they dont run into many black folk in that side of the city. And dont truly understand the us, but what they read and see.

[theghostlytoastwriter]

Letter (Spamano)

Country names are used!

Warning for Angst, character death, and cheating!

~-~-~-~

The small house that was in the City was practically silent, excluding the Disney movie playing. Spain and Romano were bundled up, as it was an extremely chilly night. It was to be expected in November, but it felt like it was already December! Romano had long fallen asleep, the smaller male practically attached himself to Spain for “warmth.” The Spaniard was stroking the smaller one’s auburn colored hair, being careful to avoid the curl that strangely struck out from him. The Spaniard sighed. Oh how life was perfect. Sure, people had their ups and downs, but for him, it was nearly perfect.

The light from the television was perfectly glowing against the smaller one’s face. Romano seemed at peace. Like he came to terms that everything was right in the world. He maybe even looked, dare Spain say it, happy? One thing for sure is that Romano looked at peace. And that Romano was adorable in his sleep, and awake too. The television soon turned off, due to inactivity. After his eyes got adjusted to the dark, he looked at Romano again. Even in slight darkness, Romano was still beautiful. To be honest, in any type of light, Spain thought Romano was beautiful.

Spain snuggled closer to his lover and closed his eyes. The chilly air now felt more comforting, welcoming even. The bundles of blankets on them felt extra cuddly, perfect for night like this. And Soon enough, he fell to peaceful sleep, the Spaniard’s final thoughts being that he truly was lucky to have met Romano.

Romano woke up, and right into Spain’s green eyes staring at him. “Bastard! What the hell! You stalker!” The Spaniard let out a dramatic gasp. “Roma! You wound me! I would never!” Romano sighed. “Now get up. I have to go to work.” Even though they were literal personifications of countries, most countries had to work. They had to get food somehow! Romano’s schedule was Monday through Friday, while Spain’s was Tuesday through Saturday. Sunday was the only day they got together. But now, it was the dreaded Monday, so Romano had to work.

“Alright Roma, I’m getting up! But I’m going to cook breakfast today, since you always spent so much time to take a bath on Mondays!” Romano had to agree with that last part. “All right fucking bastard. But no weird Spanish stuff[1], okay?” Spain only grinned and nodded. The two got up and headed to different bathrooms. Luckily, the house they owned had two different bathrooms, so they never had to share a bathroom. If they did, well, let’s just say that Romano’s legs would start hurting, And not because he was simply standing.

Romano opened the door and closed it behind him, making sure to lock the door in the process. He then stripped away his clothing and turned the bath. He waited till it was full and then stepped in. The Italian felt ease in there, like everything wrong had gone away. Romano sighed. If only the world could feel this relaxing, Oh well. After what felt like mere minutes, he started actually cleansing himself. Hey, he wanted some time to relax! After a while, he finally got up. He fired himself off and stepped out of the bathtub, making sure to get rid of the plug in the drain too. He looked around and finally found some spare clothes in a cabinet.

Romano out some clothes, making sure he looked good in the mirror. Let’s say, he did look quite good. In his opinion anyways. He opened the bathroom door, and got greeted by the sweet scent of food. It smelled like, well, pancakes. He hadn’t smelled one for what felt like ages. Romano let the scent lead him to the kitchen, where Spain was cooking. The Italian sat down before speaking. “How the fuck were you able to take a bath so fast?” Spain turned around, not hearing the auburn had entered the kitchen. “Oh! Roma! Finally, you took more than half an hour in the bathroom!” The smaller male stayed silent, not believing what the other male had just said. “I-It felt like fucking minutes! You m-must be lying!” He sputtered out.

Romano couldn’t believe he spent that much time in the bathroom. “Nope! Here, I just finished the batch!” Spain handed Romano some pancakes on a plate, along with some that looked perfectly well done. The Italian shoved some food in his mouth, along with some syrup too. What? He was hungry. And he needed to get to work soon. Soon, in a gaping time of five minutes, he finished eating the pancakes. He grabbed some orange juice to wash it all down. Spain chuckled at the sight. “Wow, you were really hungry!” Romano let out a fake laugh. “Ha Ha, real fucking funny. Now, make sure not to tell people what happened yesterday! Okay?!”

Spain laughed, and had a mischievous smile on his face. “You’re going to have to give me a kiss~!” Romano sputtered out a couple words before responding. “What?! No fucking Way!” “I’ll call Ita and tell him!” Romano looked at the Spanish man with anger clearly seen in his eyes. “You’re fucking bluffing!” Spain grinned, promptly pulled out his phone, and touched Italy’s contact. Romano was surprised before gathering his composure. “You’re just fucking bluffing again!” The Spaniard laughed, clicked the call button, and put the phone on speaker.

“Don’t!” The southern Italian reached of the phone, but the taller man had a clear advantage for obvious reasons. Spain was tall, he was short. “Fuck, Okay, Okay! I’ll fucking do it!” Spain pressed the end call button, and looked at Romano with a smile. The auburn haired male huffed in annoyance, went on his tip toes, and kissed the guy. The taller man grinned ear to ear. “Now do you know where my stupid-ass suitcase is? It had documents I need to show to some bastards at work.” “It’s in front of the door!” “What door?!” “The front door!”

Romano ran over there, and sure enough, the suitcase was there. “Why the hell is my suitcase here?” Spain walked next to him and shrugged. “Anyways, you need to go to work! It’s almost ten am!” The Italian said goodbye and left, but not before getting smothered with kisses by a certain Spaniard. One day, he was going to die from getting kissed so much, he knew it.

Work then flew by him surprisingly. Romano’s day always seemed to last by a century. That’s what happens in a box office. But this particular day, it went extremely fast. It felt like only a minute passed. Maybe because he hated the job? Maybe because he wanted to see Spain? Scratch that Last part, there’s no way in hell Romano would ever admit that last part. During the walk back to the house, he started wondering why Spain was so nice? Now that he thought about it, that day, Spain was extremely nice. From the breakfast to the shower. It was, well, weird. And why did Spain want the kiss? He knew that the guy loved kisses and would often do stuff like that, but never truly in a way like that. To go all the way to calling his fratello[2]? It had never happened.

Soon enough, Romano got into the house. His work was relatively a small walk from the tiny house, so he never needed to use a car. He entered the home, which was oddly silent. No television, no sink, no shower, nothing. Just dead silent. The only sound he could hear was his footsteps and his breath. Where was Spain? The Italian walked around, and ended at the bedroom that Spain and he shared. Romano opened the door slowly, not wanting to make too much noise. There, on the bed, was a sitting Spaniard. While Holding a letter in his hands, Spain looked up at him, with a bittersweet smile. Romano was confused.

What was going on?

“Spain, tell me right now, what’s fucking going on.” It would be a lie to say he wasn’t scared, he kind of was. This is the saddest he’s ever seen Spain. “Tell me right fucking now what’s happening!” The Spaniard stood up, almost in a trance, and headed towards him. About one foot away from him, he stopped. He handed the letter to the auburn haired male, and looked at him straight in the eye. “Read it.” Romano was slightly scared, so he took the letter and read it. He only got halfway before he burst into tears. The letter read some words he thought he would never read.

Dear Romano.

I love you, I love you so much. You know that, right? I hope you do. Look, I love you, but I have to tell you this. A level of trust in a way. About two weeks ago I, Well, put my mouth on another man’s. I moaned out another man’s name. I was drunk, I didn’t know what was happening until it was too late. I’m so, so, so sorry. If I could write down how bad I feel, how much I want to Apologise, this letter would be endless. I’m just, so sorry.  I had put my mouth on another, I had sex with another.

Romano only read up to that part Before he started crying. Crying was an understatement. He was sobbing. He just, could understand. He was heartbroken. Why? Why had Spain gone and went with another? They didnt just kiss. They had sex with each other. Did he even matter anymore? Oh god, why, why, why? Why would this happen? The day was great, oh why? Romano wanted this to be a nightmare, but he couldn’t wake up if it was one. Oh who was he kidding, this was no nightmare.

This was the true horrible, ugly truth.

“Look, Romano, I’m so sorry. I didnt know what was happening and-” The Italian cut him off. “You didn’t fucking know? You didn’t fucking know?! You cheated on me with another man, you think I’ll be okay with that?!” “I’m sorry! I didn’t know and I just…” “You had the fucking choice to not go out! And you’ve been keeping this from me for Two shitty weeks?!” “I’m sorry! It’s hard tell someone when this happened, you know?!” “Well I’ve never had to, since I don’t fucking cheat on other people!” “Well, it’s not like you can do anything anyways!” The two argued more and more, and at this point, both were crying. The more they argued, the more they raised their voices at each other. Until one of them snapped.

“God, it’s like you don’t fucking are for me at all!” “Well damn, I do freaking care about you! Remember who took you from Austria? Who gave you a roof to live under? Food? Remember? That was me! God, I should’ve traded you for Italy a long time ago!” There was no response from the other. There was silence. And then, just sobbing. No words, just sobbing.

Romano sobbed louder than ever before, god, he was heartbroken. Sad. Angry. He felt, betrayed. He looked into Spain’s green eyes, which were filled with anger, one last time before fleeing the room, and after deciding, the house. He didn’t know where he we going, he didn’t need to. All he needed to do is to get away get away from him. To get away from Spain. He didn’t want to talk at him, look at him, or even think about him. Romano wanted someone to lean on right now, it used to be Spain, but now, there’s no one.

Hours passed. Romano was so, so tired. But he didn’t know where to go. His fratello was five hours away from the house, and he didn’t even know where he was. The Italian tried to retrace his steps, but he just got more lost. He felt alone. It was as someone had punched him in the gut. Actually, as if someone had beaten him up and left him to die. The moon shone brightly at him, like it was mocking him. Romano crossed the road, and only got halfway before he got there when he heard a scream. He whipped his head and saw a car, and that was the last thing he saw.

It had been weeks before Spain decided to call Italy. He had been trying to call Romano, but to no avail. If he wasn’t sorry before, he was definitely sorry now. The phone ringed a couple times before he heard some shuffling. “Ciao[3] Spain! Ve~ How are you?” “Good, and what about you?” “Mostly good!” “Hey, do you know where Romano is?” There was dead silence. “You didn’t know?” Italy said, with his voice quivering. “He was in a car accident week ago. I-I thought you knew.” The two stayed silent. “Ah, well, thanks for telling me.” Spain hanged up and threw his phone, not caring if he broke it or not. Damnit, why? Why world, why?! What the hell did Romano do?! Why?! Spain sobbed until he had no more tears. He screamed and wallowed in sadness until he had no voice. It was all so unfair. If he only hadn’t given the letter, everything would’ve been well. Oh, god.

It was all his fault, wasn’t it?

~-~-~-~

So, for the footnotes! [1] the weird Spanish stuff. Spaniards can add a bunch of spices to regular food, which can make the food worse. It depends on if you like it simple or not. [2] fratello. Italian for brother. Please tell me if I’m wrong! [3] Ciao. Hello in Italian. Please tell me if I’m wrong!