#i didn't get any of those how did i manage that
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olderthannetfic · 1 day ago
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Im neither a proshipper nor an anti at this current stage in life, but at one point i was an anti i guess? And I hate it say it, but looking back, I understand why. I don't think I actually gave a fuck about Harmful Fanfic or whatever, it was just a substitute for therapy that i couldn't get at the time (because "literally neurodivergent and a minor" or whatever, but like...actually literally neurodivergent and a minor LOL).
As weird as it sounds like, no one cared about my ACTUAL PAIN, and that made me feel EVEN MORE PAIN, so i took it out on ppl who shipped "abuse", or whatever.
It's so stupid now, as an adult who is mentally better than I was then, but as ridiculous as it was, seeing someone ship an "abusive" ship or a "queer erasing ship" (like a canonically gay character with someone of the other binary gender)...it felt eerily similar to the actual abuse I was facing and the stress that everyone was putting on me to find a boyfriend or ask why my (closeted lesbian) self didn't like any boys.
But it was so much easier to keyboard warrior about how people who ship Bad things are Bad people, than it was to fix any problems in my actual life because...well, the actual problems in my life COULDN'T be fixed. That isn't a learned helplessness thing, there was genuinely nothing I could've done. So pissing off Shippers was, like, a vessel for that, and it *felt* like I was getting to lash out at the same people who were ACTUALLY hurting me, even though that obviously is not the case. Funny thing is, it wasn't actual fandom discourse that made me switch sides, it was getting to learn more about youth liberation movements and stuff, because it was then that I recognized the actual structures that were making me hurt.
I think one silver lining is it's made me more compassionate an adult. While I don't have any defense for the antis who do actual horrendous stuff like doxxing or sending death/rape threats, etc, I do have a lot of defense for the ones who were like me and would just make posts talking about how Wrong it is to ship certain things. I know that not all antis are in the same place that I was once was, and some are just genuinely immature brats, but it's like. . . I get it, you know?
The cycle of abuse/bullying is weird and it's not often a 1:1 "I had an abusive parent so now i'll be an abusive parent", sometimes it's the chronically online stuff like I did. It's also why I'm careful-careful to not engage and to just block or, even try to have a mature discussion if I can, and if the person I'm talking to is just "a little bit annoying" rather than "actual bully doing/sending illegal stuff". A lot of them just want to be heard, I think, and it really makes me sad that this is the way they choose to be heard...but also i get it, because i was that.
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Yup. We often discuss anti tendencies in this framework.
People want control over their environment when they have none. They want the world to make sense and for there to be simple rules they can follow to Never Mess Up. This is a very common reaction to trauma and also typical of brains that like order and neat boxes and a world full of justice and logic.
The trouble is that a critical mass of "I'm just pointing this out" type posts does tend to make all the other teens with an issue around moral scrupulosity implode. (And let's be real, plenty of the antis themselves are secretly into dark content and are trying to pray the gay kink away.)
I have some sympathy, but I'm still going to tell people they're sealioning when they are and tell them they're flat out wrong about how fantasies work, not sugar coat it because they're probably a delicate teen. There's no need to be excessively mean or treat people as irredeemable, but I also don't like how we talk endlessly about compassion for teen antis and not for teens targeted by antis. It's similar to how there are all those complaints like "Hey, I work hard to manage my mental illness, but all the support seems to go to people who are letting their issues rampage..."
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itstheval · 15 hours ago
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Memory of Visitation
A @livesworthlivingau Side Story
"Oh Stars, I remember this town! This place sucked!"
Siffrin said it with a laugh as they entered Wolworth, but everyone else simply glanced strangely at him. The realization hit them at the same time it did Mira, from the look on their faces. "Time travel s-" "NO SPOILERS!"
Mira half-pulled her rapier, but the look on her face was one of jest that kept a smile on Siffrin's face, even as they raised their hands up defensively. "Okay, okay! I just…There were a lot of memories wrapped up in this town. So, uh…" His eyes flickered around to the others, looking for help, and getting only amusement at his plight.
"Hmf. I believe, I will go take a walk. To explore. Bonnie, would you come with me? You have the shopping list." "Aw, Crab, I wanted to hear!" Mirabelle harumphed her way away, frills spinning as she twirled on a heel and walked into town, leaving Siffrin staring helplessly as Bonnie rushed to catch up with her, hat bouncing with every rushed step. Vale's laugh broke the tension, and Siffrin turned back to look at them. "Oh well DONE, Stardust! We can really see the skills it took you thirty years to hone!"
The flush darkening their cheeks was matched only by their urge to snap back, and they managed to find their voice. "Don't laugh too hard, Vale, not until you find out WHAT happened here. Besides, I might make sure it happens to you…"
"We got here…I want to say a few months, after the King? We'd met you, Nille, but there was a lot you didn't know. I hadn't even opened up to everyone yet…I'd say I'm sorry, but you know. Wrong people to apologize to. But you, Odile! You're always too clever, and you'd noticed, by now."
"I'll take that as a compliment." Odile managed, smiling wryly. She recognized an Old Man Ramble by now, but Siffrin's stories were always worth the listen.
"Noticed what, precisely?" Vale's question was colder, but from the look on their face, the queasiness in their expression, they already knew.
"Well…Back then. Before I knew any better. And I want to make it real clear, I know better now! But back then, I would…Punish myself. With my dagger. For things that…hadn't happened, to any of you? And I'd hide it with my Craft, which…I learned way more about the limits of Healing Craft than I should have."
Siffrin didn't bother looking at everyone's faces. He knew what they looked like. He'd seen them before, and they broke his heart the first time, when it was Odile revealing this. Even so much later, thinking about those expressions hurt.
What he wasn't expecting was the sudden enfolding of arms around him. Isabeau's warm body against his, enfolding him, and a moment later Odile's hand on his head, patting it gently. Even Nille joined in on the hug, and a glance up showed Vale nearby, looking in. This was…different? This was nice. Until, on some unspoken signal, everyone stepped away.
"I'm sorry Sif, just…the look on your face. I don't think anybody could see that and NOT want to give you a hug! We know it's alright, but the way you looked…"
"Like a crab just pinched your puppy." Nille confirmed.
"Yeah, or like…I dunno, like someone ate your favorite treat you were saving for later!"
In that moment, he was loved. In all moments, he was loved, but it was nice to see it so clearly, and the smile Siffrin let onto his face was genuine. "Thanks…I don't like thinking about this stuff. But, no bottling myself up, not to my family! That's what I promised."
"Promised who, precisely?" Odile's voice was wry, in the way that came when she was trying to not show affection.
"Well I was getting to that! Before everyone decided it was group hug time! Anyway! Odile noticed, and she…told everyone, when we were here. I'm not ashamed to say, I ran off. I was stupid…I thought none of you would care about me if you knew how much I hated myself."
"You're absolutely right, Stardust." Vale finally decided to add their two cents, and everyone's heads snapped towards them, making them glad that looks couldn't kill - they'd be dead four times over, at least! It was Odile who found her voice first.
"Explain?"
"He WAS stupid!"
Vale's laugh cut the tension that their statement made, and Siffrin was the first to join into it, before everyone else allowed themselves to be part of it.
"Right! Right, where was I…Running away. Right. Well, Odile was too smart again." A glance to her showed a smirk that showed she agreed. "I ran and hid in the House…and her letter had gotten there first. And when people showed up expecting me, and bringing me to an appointment? I wasn't going to tell them they had the wrong person. Whoever's appointment it was, I could hide there until you all forgot! And that's how I met my therapist."
The sharp bark of laughter from Odile showed just what she thought of that, but Isabeau was quick to follow, as Nille shook her head in exasperation. "That actually worked?" She said, around a smile, and Vale nodded with mock seriousness. "It would have worked on me. Smart."
Siffrin decided then to start walking and talking, as he explained the rest of it. "Doctor Jinn was…strange. Even for Vaugarde. It/its pronouns, with lightless hair with darkless spots in it, like the stars. I'd have almost thought it was from home, except that everyone I've seen from there had darkless hair…and Doctor Jinn was a housemaiden. Or…I mean, it was working in the house, and it wore a change symbol on a necklace? And one of them for a bonding earring? Anyway, it had its own office set up, and was ready for me and everything. It wasn't until it addressed me by my name that I realized what happened. But Odile, why did you tell it my name was 'Siffrin Nomiddlename Nolastname'?"
"I couldn't begin to imagine." Odile allowed, walking the crowded streets, Isabeau pushing ahead and the others walking in the wake of the broad man like wakesurfers…Siffrin briefly wondered where he'd heard that term, then remembered they were telling a story.
"Well, that's what it called me. Like that, like 'Nomiddlename' and 'Nolastname' were names themselves. It was a great listener, I'll tell you that…It seemed to accept the Wish Craft stuff pretty easily, and didn't blame me for…" a light cough. "Any of it." Siffrin glanced to the side, and when the others followed their glance, they saw Bonnie at a stall, haggling with a zit-faced teen about the price of tomatoes.
"The interesting thing was…Well, when we got there, we were sort of wandering wherever we felt like, just seeing the world? And it turned out that Jinn was traveling anyway, so we wound up joining it…or it joined us, but we just wound up going where it led. It was convenient, and it meant I couldn't get away from it, either. So…we wound up talking a lot. Almost the whole time we were in Wolworth, and even on the roads." Sif took a turn, but kept up his memories. "About the Loops, about what I could and couldn't remember, about…well, everything, really. How I felt about Isa, how I felt about touch, home, why the Universe granted wishes like it did - it really didn't have much to say there, but it was great to just get it out of my system."
Vale was starting to look uneasy as they walked along, and Siffrin knew it was now or never, time to strike and hope everyone else was on board. "It was so useful, in fact, that I felt like visiting again. I sent a letter ahead myself this time, since…well, you didn't have a reason to, Madame. And don't worry, Vale, I told them all about you!"
Siffrin's grin was shameless, and watching the look on Vale's face was worth the entire time, as they realized how close they were to the opened doors of the House. And how Isabeau was blocking them off to the side…Vale couldn't escape that way, maybe…no, Nille was over there. Maybe through the Madame? With that look on her face, no way. That was the Path of Pain.
Vale's shoulders slumped, as Siffrin stepped aside and gave a sweeping bow. "After you, my friend!" Vale muttered oaths under their breath as they marched to the doors, only to find a Housemaiden waiting for them.
"Siffrin and Vale Nomiddlename Nolastname? I'm Housemaiden David…I got your letter, but I'm afraid no one here's ever heard of a 'Doctor Jinn'. Would you like to come in anyway?"
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Okay here we go
Does Stanfraud's eye still bleeds, like when Bill was possessing Ford or doesn't because of his bigger connection to Ford's body?
Is Stanfraud an uncle/big brother figure to Soos, like Stanley is his dad figure? Does Bill even care about him even a little😢
I know that the main focus of this au is on Bill, but since Stanley didn't try to pretend to be Ford, how did Stanley's and Filbrick's first meeting went after the whole "getting kicked out" thing"? Especially since both Stan and Ford were definitely broke at the time
You mentioned that Bill still has access to a little portion of his powers, what are they exactly?
Anyway your au is genuinely awesome and seeing it on my dash is always a huge treat 💛💛💛
Okay the first question I really want to answer because I’ve been thinking about this:
— His eye definitely bleeds on occasion. Even though he is far more connected to Ford’s body here, he’s still a demon possessing a host. He shouldn’t be there. There’s some outer force keeping him trapped. So I have thought about the fact there would probably be some lasting impacts on the body due to possession exposure for so long, such as the eye bleeding becoming a regular problem and gradual loss of vision in that eye. There may also be other physical impacts, but I’ll work on those when I manage to get down an official design for him.
— Great News! He is like Soos’ weird uncle! That may be where he learned to be somewhat decent around kids, honestly. He absolutely tried to mess with him at first, make jabs, tell him the date of his death, attempt to drive him to madness just a little (this is why Stan had to get rid of the last handyman), but Soos proved to be incorruptible and took all of Stanfraud’s weirdness in stride. Bill does end up caring about him. He goes as far as to liking their conversations. Soos keeps up with his chaos! Even Bill isn’t sure what’s going on in that head of his (when he gets his own body back he’s going to find out).
— Though Bill is the main focus of the plot-change, the other aspects are equally as important and so I’m glad they also have people’s interest! Their first meeting is… tense, to say the least. If Filbrick has any regrets, which I think I’ll leave up to interpretation, he’s far too stubborn a man to show them, and would rather dig himself further into a hole than admit he made a mistake. Stan desperately just wants to ignore all the scathing comments and get this little reunion over with, until Filbrick makes a comment about Ford, then Stan snaps. You can insult him, he probably deserves it, but not his brother. Sure, they may not be his brother right now, but the intent is there, and that’s what counts.
It cuts everything short, with Stan grabbing Fraud and telling him they’re leaving (He doesn’t complain).
With Filbrick, I do kind of want to explore their dynamic over the years while he’s still alive, especially with Stan, but also with how he’d treat ‘Ford’ and his odder behaviour. I don’t want to just make Filbrick a one-dimensional character though, as I think there’s a lot to be said about the cycle of abuse and parental projection so. While the AU may be based around the question ‘what if Bill got stuck possessing Ford?’ The answers it has lead me down a lot of different paths to explore — such as this!
— The powers he has access too lessen over time, but currently he is somewhat capable of seeing potential future outcomes (ciphervoyance), pyrokinesis, telekinesis, faster healing factor and teleportation. Note that all of these are in a much weaker state and drain Ford’s body and by extension Bill heavily — especially teleportation. Doing that once can cause him to pass out, so it’s more of an emergency thing, most his abilities are honestly. Too much focus is required.
And I’m so happy to be a little treat on your dash!! I hope you enjoy all this just as much!
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albinokittens300 · 2 days ago
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!Spoilers Under The Cut!
A/N: SO...been a minute since I wrote fic but. Made sense since I have ideas floating around might as well write and share them. Please note not only am I rusty writing in general, this is my first attempt at these characters. Be gentle on me please XD. I do hope you all enjoy. Let me know what you think, and maybe I'll try and get another one out maybe before Act 2 drops this weekend. All this ended up being was a little drabble of a possible reunion between Ekko and Jinx because I need some Timebomb goodness. Isha making an appearance is a bonus! Fair warning I make some wild leaps about what goes on during Act 2, so beware this is based some of my speculation.
He lets it go on for a few turns into different allies before finally stopping.
Ekko knows his little shadow is nothing more than a child, judging by the sound of the sets on the stone and the occasional clang of metal being kicked or tripped on. He usually wouldn't be worried- but with no one chasing after and taking her back to where she belonged, he took it as the sign it was. To follow him so far means she is all alone. Having just gotten back across the bridge, helping an orphan wasn't something on the list of deep concerns. At least, not until it needed to be.
"As quiet as you are, I have to say it'd be easier to get around if you weren't hiding." He says softly. Light brown eyes peek around the corner, playing at being undercover without actually doing so. She is hard to make out in low and greeish light, but he manages. "You can come out. Not gonna hurt you. All safe, I promise."
His hair raises, though, when her gaze flicks back to where he can't see. By all appearances, she is getting permission. So the girl isn't alone. When she takes a few steps out, he tries to remain unsuspicious.
"Whose behind there?" He asks as he kneels while she approaches.
"Definitely not who you're expecting." A darker, familiar voice speaks.
Jinx hasn't even revealed herself before the instinct takes over, and Ekko grabs the little girl and puts her behind him.
Attempting to pull her away from the known danger sets off another problem, though- the little girl reacts as if she has been burned. Letting out a cry, she wiggles away from him quickly before running back and wrapping herself around Jinx. While she removes the hood of her cloak, revealing a far too proud smirk, another arm wraps around the kid's shoulder. His eyes quickly scan her other side. A few bombs are latched there, but no pistol or any of her bigger toys. It was not a situation he loved, but it was preferable to facing down a minigun.
When Ekko's eyes return to the child, he doesn't think someone so small has ever looked at him so frightened. Something screams this isn't right as he watches for a few seconds.
"Relax, this one, I'll admit, has a reason to be a bit jumpy." She says, directing the words at the girl. Then, leveling a look at him. "What was it Vi said you had to say when the two of ya caught up? About looking good for a dead person?"
"That makes three of us, then." He says back. "Wanna explain what is going on down here, seeing as you are my welcoming party."
"Ah, nothing much. War, revolution, infighting, and unifying! All of that. If you are looking for the Firelights, they aren't at the tree. Or what's left of it." She says with a wave of her hand and a shrug. The blood runs like ice at the words and he rounds on her.
"What did you-"
"Woah, woah, I didn't do anything. Those wackos from Noxus? They are the ones who tracked the tree. My only part was helping everyone out." She hisses back. When his face changes, so does hers—relaxing just the slightest bit. Helped them out? Months trapped away should mean nothing surprise him. But it does.
He sees her arms crossed, watching and almost waiting for him to decide how this will go. Deciding to match her lack of hostility, just this once, he looks around to the eerily empty and quiet lanes.
"Guess I got a lot to catch up on."
That brings a less taunting smirk to her face. "Just a bit."
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zosan-secondchances · 1 day ago
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Vinsmoke Siblings Storytime!
The context about this new blog~
I'm working on a story where Vinsmoke Judge fucked up entirely after he realised that there's no one next in line to the throne after his children.
The last of his Germa scientists concluded that they're simply too machine-like to bear their own. Judge was getting old and sick, and he knew that he didn't have a lot of time left. He decided that desperate times call for desperate measures.
The Vinsmoke siblings were forced to go through some extreme emotional and physical changes to become more "human" which entirely lead to Judge driving them away after they realised how much of a monster he really was. The siblings flee from their old home in search of a better future.
Maybe Reiju, Ichiji, Niji and Yonji want to find dreams of their own, much like how their distant brother did. Unanimously, they decide that they reconnect.
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Ichiji's greatest challenges lie in managing his own emotional growth while also holding his family together. He tries various ways to make sure they don’t fall apart. Over time, he lets his hair grow long, often taking advantage of Sanji's unexpexted barber skills to keep it in shape. In reality, he just enjoys being "in the chair," where he can quietly seek advice from his blonde brother about handling his inner struggles and other matters of the heart.
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Niji hangs up his sword and studies up on Vegapunk. He still has remnants of his ability to use electricity, which he uses to his advantage to invent new things, including a new type of Eternal Compass which works exclusively with him and his siblings due to the unique properties of their exoskeletons. Maybe all those painful augmentations weren't all for naught after all.
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Yonji seeks Zoro's guidance on regaining his strength since his augmentations have either been forcefully removed or had gone completely dormant. Zoro also gives him pointers on how to become a successful bounty hunter. In return, Yonji protects Baratie and all the islands within the All Blue, and filters out any unworthy challengers who try to claim the swordsman's title, allowing Zoro more time to address more domestic concerns.
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Reiju has a deep dark secret that she thought she could take to the grave. When her brothers found out that she got hurt, they're not having it. Shit's going down.
I don't know how this story will go just yet. But I do enjoy writing and drawing ideas down.
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hiskillingjar · 2 days ago
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Dumb/Bimbofication (Strade/MC)
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one of my top kinks that i totally overthought and ruined for myself for like two weeks lol, but the purpose of this challenge is to NOT overthink. STUPID. dumb. why are you so dumb, huh? i know you like being dumb, but just try to think for even a second, okaaaaay? :3
day 30: dumb/bimbofication second person. cw for incredibly dubious consent. please actually go to college. or don’t. i’m not your dad.
"Ooh! You've got a student ID in here. What, trying to keep all those discounts even after you've graduated? You naughty thing."
You whimpered very quietly, your voice like the shivering mewl of a dying animal, as Strade sifted through your purse. 
He tossed aside your personal effects flippantly, pocketing any cash you had stuffed between the folds (what little you did have), and flicked through your numerous credit and loyalty cards carelessly, covering the basement floor with remnants of the life you had before him.
If you could even call this a life.
"Nooo, hang on, this is pretty up to date," He then said after a beat, his features narrowing as he took a closer look at your ID, before his eyes went back up to yours, a dark brow raised in a silent question. "You haven't graduated yet?” He grimaced, but it was a sympathetic expression that didn’t suit him in the slighest. “Yeesh, you're a little too old to be at university anymore, aren't you?"
"I'm...a-a grad student," You murmured, idly licking your bloody lips (you refused to drink anything he had offered you and you were sorely regretting that decision now) and casting your gaze downwards, not wanting to look at him. "I...um, I teach sometimes, too…guest lectures, that sort of thing…"
"You're a teacher?" He asked, raising his brow.
"Teaching assistant," You corrected him, before looking back down. "Um...I'm...working on a PhD...in, um," You bit your lip, cringing slightly at the dramatic irony. "...Criminal psychology."
"Criminal-HAH!" He cut himself off with a hearty guffaw, a deeply indulgent smile spreading on his face, clearly thrilled by your discomfort. "Wow, what are the chances?! Hey," He sat forward with another laugh, pushing himself closer towards you. "If you survive this," If. "This'll be a great inclusion in your essay, won't it? They'll give you that fancy degree on the spot!"
Your lip trembled and you looked down again, trying to hold yourself together (trying not to burst into tears) and not think too much about the fact he said 'if you survive'.
If.
You'd read countless books, journals and articles about guys like Strade, the rare sadist (who were not so rare, with one in ten people identifying with sadistic traits, according to university study) who didn't channel his desires into relationships with vulnerable girls or tearing people apart online, but actually did something about it. 
You should know how to deal with situations like this. And you did, on paper anyway.
Theory rarely worked as well, in real life, as they did on paper.
"Hmph," He chuckled, looking back down at the student ID before he tossed it aside (and even that stung a little). "I’m not being fair…it’s impressive, really! You must be pretty smart, huh?" His expression softened slightly, golden eyes sparkling with mirth, before he reached out and ran a hand through your hair. "How lucky for you...beautiful AND clever. Most people only get graced with one of those features, you know?"
You didn’t say anything, but you let your head follow his touch, a tear beading down your cheek.
You thought it best to play along, at least a little, and not piss him off anymore than you had to.
You did want to survive this, after all.
Strade let out a huff through his nose and gently (as gently as he could manage) brushed the tear away with his thumb, before his fingers wrapped around your chin and he forced you to look up at him again. 
"I don't think smarts are good for much, though," He said cryptically, canting his head to the side with a strange sort of smirk. "Not in a situation like yours."
He then pushed his free hand through your hair, and forcefully slammed your head back against the support beam you were propped up against. 
"HNGH-!"
Without time to prepare or adjust, you could feel your eyes widen and bulge out your skull, straining against your fragile eyelids, and your teeth rattle (you even wondered if he’d knocked something loose with the force of the slam), and a wound opened on the back of your head, near instantly, weeping and red, blood running down the back of your neck.
"NGH, s-stop!" You yelped, planting bound up hands (flattened into parcel-tape wrapped mitts, so you could move but not much else) against his chest and trying to push him away.
He laughed callously as you struggled against him, but he stayed where he was, bringing his free hand up and tapping your forehead with a finger.
A condescending little gesture that made your insides twist uncomfortably.
"How about you stop thinking first?" He said.. "It's like I said already, fraulein, smarts aren't gonna help you, and smart people like you,” He tapped your forehead again. “You always think too much. So, stop using that thing in your head, hm?"
"Mmf," You sniffled, soft and pathetic sounding, from the pounding pain, even more tears running down your burning cheeks, as he shoved your head back against the support beam again, your head throbbing and oozing with blood the more he fucked with you. "Stop, please-"
"Come on, I alread told you what I want!" He said, somehow outraged, with a tut and a shake of his head. "Mein gott, it's really so easy. Just switch that brain off and focus on being...mm, cute, hm?” He smirked, clearly pleased with himself when your flushed cheeks flushed someohow darker. “After all, I don't think you're really cut out for this…ah, psychologist business, are you, fraulein?"
He reached out, running a finger down your face, before smirking and tilting his head. 
"You know better than I do, you have to keep your emotions in check when you're dealing with criminals like me, sweetie. You need to stay calm if you want to think clearly. Didn't they teach you that in all those classes of yours?~"
He unexpectedly (totally expetedly, you were just too out of it to think right) slammed your head back into the beam, knocking your brain around even more, as another rivuloet of blood ran down the small of your back and trickled on the cement floor.
"Stop iiiit, stop thinking!" Strade teased, grinning lecherously, despite his evident frustration. as he leaned into you, bringing his mouth close to your ear. "Come ooon, you already know that you're not getting out of this, don't you? What are you clinging onto all those smarts for?” You felt the caress of his tongue run over the shell of your ear, and your grimace just set deeper. “You might even like dumbing down a little."
He snicked again, his tongue tracing the line of tears on your flushed cheek, as his fingers, sticky with the blood oozing from your head. trailed down your heaving chest.
"I know I'll like it, anyway."
"Hhhh," You let out a deep exhale when he finally let go of your hair, your head sinking down to your thighs, barely able to support yourself.
Your head was hurting so badly. 
You just wanted to be left alone. 
"Heh, good for you. You're pretty stubborn!" He said, like he was paying you a compliment, moving closer to your slumped form for a moment. "They teach you that in your fancy college? How to put up with torture, threats, rape, that sort of thing? Sounds like a class I'd like a whole lot…"
Strade pushed himself to his feet with a soft 'hup!', then, and paced over to his workbench, openinhg one of the drawers with a metallic clatter.
"Well, if you won't respond to violence...I think I know another way to, ah...turn your brain off, so to speak."
He rifled through the drawer for a moment before he produced what looked like a...egg vibrator.
Your head was still swimming from his pain, but your eyes widened, dreadfully wide (with dread being the operative word) and you forced yourself to sit up as he paced back towards you, smirking like a Devil at the clear fear in your expression. 
"Ah, I know that look," He grinned as he took the knee in front of you again, moving his foot (the thick sole of his boot) over your ankle and pinning it still against the basement floor. “Mm, maybe they don’t prep you for rape, like I thought they did…might want to talk about that with those professors if you get out of this one, liebling~”
"Ngh, no, no-" You grimaced as his free hand forced your thighs to part.
"Now, I'm not usually one to do this sort of thing.” He started, like you hadn’t said a thing. “I've got a buddy who's way more into this stuff then I am, but, ah," He raised his eyes to yours, his expression giving away an eleation that made your stomach churn. "I'm getting the sense that a geek like you isn't so familiar with the more...intimate sides of things, hm? Sooo, maybe I should use that to my advantage?"
“Nononono,” You grit your teeth with erratic fear, trying to guard yourself with your taped up paws, but he was stronger than you (and not dazed out of his mind), and was able to overpower you with ease, pinning your hips backwards and forcing the egg into the gusset of your underwear. “No, Strade, please-!”
"And hey, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe you’re not a total prude like I thought, but…no offence, but you don't seem to be a very popular kind of girl," He teased with a shit eating smirk. "With your head in the books all the time, I'm guessing you didn't have much time to be...social, huh?” 
He kneeled between your spread legs then, forcing them to open to accommodate him and only pushing you more open.
“Well, no worries. I'll teach you how to have a good time...and turn off the brain for a few minutes, too."
“NGH!”
You took in a sharp inhale as the toy buzzed to life (where was he even hiding the remote?), the initial sensation unfamiliar and uncomfortable, especially when combined with your throbbing head.
"Mph, see, there we go," He muttered approvingly, his golden eyes focused on the way your face was twisting into a grimace, your legs trying to close around him as the buzzing continued, relentless, rubbing against parts of yourself that even you hadn’t touched. "Now, that's a better expression. You don't have to think about that big scary brain of yours, now, do you? You get to just...let yourself be dumb for a while."
His free hand let go of your thigh and gently brushed a lock of your hair behind your ear, before cupping your cheek. 
"Doesn't that feel better? Doesn’t it feel nice to be…away from whatever life you were living before?” He tilted his head, giving you a considered expression. “You don't have to think about those grades, those classes...all those books. Sounds like a real drag, doesn't it? You get to just enjoy the feeling for a little while, okay?"
"Okaaayyy..." You drawled, squeezing your eyes shut as your shaking hands sank down to your sides, the sensation from the buzzing toy simulationusaly overwhelming and...incredibly pleasurable.
You didn’t even know your body was capable of feeling like this.
When did other people learn about this?
"Heh, that's a good girl," Strade murmured with a filthy grin, leaning in closer to you, rubbing his thu,mb over your cheek. "That’s much better. Now, you get to just be a cute little thing for me, don’t you? You don't have to think about a thing. You don't get to worry about your studies, your job, your family...anything like that.” 
He leaned in and pressed a kiss to your cheek.
“You just focus on being...sweet, and pretty, and dumb. Can you do that for me? Hmmm?~"
"Uh huuuh," You breathed out, your tight expression relaxing a little as he used the egg to massage between your wet folds, teasing a node just above your dripping hole that made you see stars. "Oh, that's good...nhh..."
"Mhmm, see? You’re feeling good," Strade chuckled, taking in the sight of you with an indulgent sigh, indulging in the way your expression was slowly relaxing and transforming under his touch.  "So good, you became a cute, little idiot for me without me even trying. Hah!”
He increased the intensity slightly, watching your expression intently.
“You're liking being a little puppet for me, aren't you? You enjoying this, even if you’re pretending otherwise. Hnn…” He grinned against your cheek, breathing you in. “You like it when I make you feel like this, all mindless and dumb for me? Come on, let me hear how much you like it."
"Oh, god-!" You gasped, pressing your sweaty, tear streaked face against his shoulder (leaving a wet print on his shirt as you did so).
He chuckled kindly, not seeming to mind, and placed a hand to the back of your head, forcing your face closer.
"That's it, baby doll," He cooed encouragingly, circling the tip of the egg in a tight little circle against your cunt. "Feels good, doesn’t it? Nice and intense? You don't have to use that head for a damn thing anymore. All those hours studying, thinking, trying to use that brain...well, it got you into some trouble all right, didn't it?” He pet your hair slowly, like he was petting an animal. “Don’t let yourself get upset again, though. It could have happened to anyone…you’re just lucky enough that it happened to you, aren’t you?”
"Mmhmm," You nodded (as best you could), biting your lip hard as you felt your brain (figuratively) start to slur in your aching, bleeding skull and…leak out of any available hole it could.
Maybe it would be better if you just submitted to him.
That's what all your classes told you to do, wasn't it? To...submit to what the criminal wanted, to play along, act dumb and pliant and easy, even if that meant losing yourself completely.
That had to be it.
"Good girl," He praised, his lips pressed against your ear again so you could feel the warmth of his breath against your skin. "Behaving so well, now, aren’t you? You just needed someone to help you feel good, and now…all those big thoughts you had before are just...slipping out of your head.”
“Mmhmm~”
“It's so much easier for someone like you, isn't it? Being a brainless, little doll? So easy to just listen to my every word and do exactly what I tell you? You can just...sit back and enjoy the feeling…you don't even have to think about it. That’s what I’m here for, isn’t it, liebling?"
Yeah.
Submitting would be the smart thing to do. 
"Hmph. So much for college, right?~"
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guiquart · 18 hours ago
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Beraneth
A brief history: Grew up in the forests of Valenwood and abided by the Green Pact. She listened with rapt attention to her father's stories of his missions for Thalmor. When she managed to convince him to take her with him to Skyrim, everything changed. There, amidst the mountains and dangers, she enjoyed life: jumping over rocks, fighting sabre cat, meeting all sorts of creatures.  The fun ended when her father suddenly disappeared. After weeks of worrying, she found his body - mutilated, murdered on Thalmor's orders. She stayed in Skyrim, full of hatred for Thalmor. Without her father's support, she had to make a living by engaging in dangerous missions. Her skills grew, but it didn't bring wealth. When she was offered a well-paid commission in Riften, she accepted, despite having to work with «altmer» Pellyon Thaorius ( +++ ). Pellyon's arrogance and contempt infuriated Beraneth, and after he insulted her, she nearly killed him. All my text is translated through a translator. If you find faults, you can let me know so that I can correct it as soon as possible. Enjoy reading! This text was written for me by this author: @frimova Long story: Nothing in the life just happens. Beraneth had learnt that long ago, when her father had taught the little one how to hunt. Valenwood was a marvellous and most importantly green province, where bosmer could observe the Green Pact without any problems. But even such beautiful places could get boring, become so familiar and usual, so mundane that he wanted to climb a tree and howl from the eating boredom. Her father had travelled many places on Thalmor's errands, and Beraneth had listened with pleasure to his stories of hot sands, stinking marshes, beautiful fields... Until she encountered a real one.. Until she threw a tantrum so that her father would finally take her to Skyrim
A place her father had never been and a place where his help was needed. Beraneth had no interest in her father's business in Thalmor. She enjoyed jumping around the mountains like a mountain goat, riding sabre cat. Simply put - she was having a blast for all her years of living in boring Valenwood. With her father's work in Skyrim ending, she would be forced to return home with him and wallow in boredom once more.
And so the year went on. Beraneth had fun with her father when he was free, and the rest of the time she amused herself: having sex with random attractive elves, people; learning how to fight with an axe from some Nord. She did not remember names.  There was no point in memorising their names and faces. Why? She would outlive most of them anyway.
... her father didn't make contact. First a day, then a second, and then it had been a week! It was as if her father had vanished from her life, even though he was a pretty punctual Bosmer. In the second week Beraneth began to worry, no matter how much the innkeeper tried to reassure her.
- «Well, it happens...» - he said, spreading his hands, - «It's common in Skyrim to go on a bender. Your father's probably made friends with the locals and is drinking with the nords... or he's found himself some hottie and he's spending time with her. Don't worry about it. More Mead?»
The words were of little help, but they calmed Beraneth's anxious thoughts for the time being. Maybe the innkeeper was right. Father had always been outgoing, friendly and smiling, with such kind eyes. It was as if Beraneth's heart had died when the letter from Thalmor arrived. She didn't even remember the contents of that letter, which she clutched with trembling hands. But those lines....
«...killed by the enemy while on duty. We offer our condolences ... compensation will be paid to the family...»
That didn't make sense! At that moment, Beraneth smelled something wrong! Then she started searching every cave and ditch near Thalmor Embassy. Using all her skills, she overheard khajiit from the caravan saying that near one cave, on the way to the sea, there was a horrible stench of rot and blood. So bad that even the bitter Skyrim frost in the mountains couldn't beat the stench. So she went there. Found that cave. Crawled into the cave. Cracked the skull of a frost troll. Found her father's corpse.
Mutilated, wearing Thalmor clothes, with a broken embalming tool
in his pocket. The kind face was twisted with fear, one eye missing. The fingers he used to braid her pigtails were broken and had no nails. She would become part of the wild hunt without the ritual. Thalmor had used her father as a torture master. He was killed.
At that moment, Beraneth didn't go home. She wrote a letter home, explaining the situation to her family, enclosing Thalmor's letter and her father's ring. And so began her life in Skyrim, where she grew to hate the altmers. Without her father's support in the form of cheerful chatter and money, Beraneth felt lost. Money for food, a bed, alchemist and blacksmith services had to be earned and it wasn't nearly as much fun. The adventurers or rather the seekers of gold and glory were dying they were dying like flies.
But Beraneth was strong. She was able to adapt. She earned a few scars, often broke bones and tore muscles, but with each passing year she grew stronger, more beautiful.... but not richer. And that led her to a customer in Riften. Some weirdo from the Thieves Guild wanted some thing pulled from the deep ruins. Dangerous, especially since Beraneth had heard that a lot of mercenaries, adventurers and scholars died in those particular ruins. But it pays a lot and she just had to pay a blacksmith to sharpen her axe. And she needed to buy new boots....
Anyway. She needed money. And the sooner the better.
But there was one little «but» that spoilt it. The reward would have to be shared. WITH ALTMER. A terrible disaster that Beraneth could have survived. The pale upstart with long hair like it came off the arse of an elderly mammoth annoyed her. His face was too arrogant. And what kind of stupid name was that? Who names their child Pellyon Thaorius? Too complicated and she wasn't going to spell that name even in her head, so she called the arrogant idiot Pelly and settled for that.
But her anger jumped a few degrees higher when two cats joined their group of two elves. What kind of noble orphanage was this? They hadn't even travelled two steps from the customer's house before conflict immediately broke out.
- «What is this?» - she asked rudely.
- «What?»-  interjected Pellyon coolly, not looking at Beraneth, giving most of his attention to the cat on his shoulder.
- «We didn't discuss having two others with you. And we're not going to split the reward four ways, and I'm certainly not going to mess with you and your cats.»
Khajiit jumped off his shoulder. The two elves stared at each other.
Pellyon said contemptuously:
- «Mudbloods weren't asked for opinions. Do your job, you miserable wretch.»
Pellyon flies to the ground, his nose bleeding. Beraneth breathes furiously, keeping himself from reaching for his axe.
- «I'll fucking kill you now, son of an Altmer whore and a Falmer brat!» *I'll tell you about the two Khajiit later Thanks for reading! Little of their interactions in the future:
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yickarus · 4 months ago
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insane how i went through all of isat and somehow missed all the Big Things that were not direct story things
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runefactorynonsense · 1 month ago
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Melotober - Day 11 - Dream
Chosen Earthmates
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simptasia · 8 months ago
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mum and i were almost not able to buy our house because a real estate lawyer heard us casually say i'm autistic and alarm bells went off in her head, because she believed that meant i wasn't mentally capable of understanding what i was signing up for
#and she demanded a doctors note. which not how any of this works#theres no policy that works like that AND gps are not the people who are like#''yup this person sure is a person alright''#she just had heaps of prejudice and she let it affect her job#so a lady from one of those places that advocates for ND and disabled people tore her apart#she lost the 4000 dollars she was gonna be paid. and she got fired#and everybody else from that company that we spoke to was either appalled or pretending to be appalled about this#either way it worked out#i was so upset at the time because it was literally a week before it was time to move???#and i was so afraid of us losing all our progress#plus. yeah i was hurt by the insinuations and the attempted disrespect to my agency#also even if i was cognitively disabled... i think cognitively disabled people deserve to own houses too#i was a fucking adult and i managed to get to every gosh forsaken appointment to sign forms#and then do it all again because what i was signing didn't match what was on my birth certificate!#...not my fault - turns out the nurse wrote my fucking name wrong#anyways. i was exhausted but i did it damn it. so that bitch trying to rob us of our home??? fuck her#6 years later and the house is now 100% mine instead of 50%#and im gonna assume that bitch never got a job in real estate again#she was totally cool with me until she heard the word ''autistic''#and clearly pictured somebody... how do i put this... somebody with vacant eyes who smacks the side of their head when they're upset#not a bad thing by the way! hell i've been that flavour of autistic plenty of times. we contain multitudes!!!!#don't mean we don't deserve to own property. we live in a society!!! let us be a part of it#but yeah that was the most serious case of me being dehumanized due to what i am
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loremonster · 4 months ago
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I'd say the children of people who shouldn't have had kids.
Still, fully agreed.
we are the daughters of parents who should not have had kids
#my parents were abused like all hell#then gave into the pressure to have children despite having no plan on how to NOT DO THAT#the society they lived in demanded they have children to Be Good People#and then when their first kid overwhelmed them? ... they found a church#that taught them all humans are inherently sinful and we're just running out the clock till judgement day#MA'S PARENTS DIDN'T RAISE HER IN ANY FAITH BECAUSE THEY DISAGREED AND DIDN'T WANNA FIGHT ABOUT IT#grandpa is catholic grandma is lutheran#dad was raised Missori Synod#which is as close as you can get to Roman Catholic while calling yourself a lutheran#they still did corporal pinishment i.e hitting kids in Sunday School#so when mom's mental health got even more difficult to manage with a CHILD TO RAISE and the HORMONAL HELL after delivery#and dad decided the way to fix it was to introduce her to jesus#and then both of them just defaulted into Do As We Say Not As We Do#expecting us to be Glorious Savants in everything we did and NEVER giving us any credit#expecting us to THANK GOD that we met expectations instead of our parents recognizing our efforts#while all wrongdoing was ALWAYS fully OUR fault#no one elses#and misunderstandings got us screamed at for lying#while Ma listened to Rush Limbah on the radio every day from before I was born to the day that hateful fuckwit died#my parents had a chance to break the cycle and heal#and didn't#and passed their traumas on to their kids through NEGLECT and failure to ENGAGE WITH THEIR OWN CIRCUMATANCES AND DO BETTER#inflicted poverty trauma on us despite us being well off by screaming at us whenever we asked for something we didn't capital N Need#but casually financing a fancy new boat for them to go fishing Because They Earned It#inflicted generational trauma by making the same demands as their parents despite telling us exactly how those demands did them harm#enforced gender roles despite ma being the most “traditionally masculine” human being I know#and dad's happy place being in the home cooking and cleaning and supporting the family unit#but dad had the good job so he didn't get to be where he was happy#and ma being denied work and decent wages and blaming it on immigrants instead of grappling with Sexism Still Being A Thing#like... yall got SO close
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robotsprinkles · 1 month ago
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think I'm going to try to remake this game from the ground up after we submit it just to see how much of the crap/issues/difficulty we're running into is because these systems are actually hard to use/create/implement and how much is because no one bothered to research or plan or think what they'd need to do and know and learn when they had the time
I swear to god if I end up being able to remake this game to my standards (and not the standards of our project manager who has completely borked priorities) in under two months I'm going to lose it
#when I say our project manager has terrible priorities#I mean he's adamant that I draw a cutscene comic for the end of our game instead of fixing the character animations#even though our animations are at best functional in that they're animations and it's clear what they're meant to be#but they look terrible and don't line up properly (characters slide across the ground when walking#because their movement speed isn't linked to the animation. and the other animations all feel awkward and limp and underwhelming)#and both the lecturer and the tutor/other teacher have said that fixing the animations so the game feels good to play#is more important than making a comic that plays after you beat the game#because it doesn't matter how good the comic is if the game is ass#and yet our project manager decided I shouldn't ditch the comic to fix our animations (because the two 3d guys are too busy to do it)#and that I really really need to get the comic done. because. I dunno.#also he didn't make our 3d guys research how to set up animation blending/combining and procedural animations during the first three weeks#even though we'd need to do those and our 3d guys weren't doing anything because I was making the concept art#he just went ''oh I guess we'll figure it out when we get to it'' when they said they'd looked at some videos but weren't sure how to do it#and now we're two weeks from submission and only ereyesterday did our second 3d guy start working on setting up the systems#that would let you aim your gun#and neither of our 3d guys have set up proper animation trees yet (and by that I mean we don't have a single one#so our animations don't blend at all and just go straight from one to the other without any in betweens/transition
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babieken · 3 months ago
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I was expecting so much more from Again My Life considering lee jungi was its main character but it was such a let down...
#like. what even was that show#it wanted to be a drama mistery political law/justic AND fantacy and it didnt manage to deliver even one of those properly#the fantasy element was a joke. and it didn't have any impact after the first... what? 3 episodes?#I kept waiting for the girl to almost die and hiu to save her. bc she mustve somehow died at cho taesob's hand in the past life#but nope#and then the main plot was a fucking mess#too many names (people and companies) kept popping up and then going away#and i can get past all of that#but what I couldn't stand about this show was how fucking stupid the laws and the power dynamics were#we never see anyone actually DO any work. they just make phonecalls and things just... happen#hiu needs something. he calls someone. and now suddenly he has all the info and proof in a folder.#where did u get that? how did u confirm the legitimacy?#cho taesob is the dumbest villain ive ever seen in a kdrama. 1 he was miscasted. that guy looked like the sweetest grandpa.#his evil laugh was... laughable#and his whole thing with being the most power man in korea was just not believable. period.#from begining to end he didn't actually gain or lose any power. he had the same (insane) amount the whole time#and he was always at his home office chillin. like...#like if his power came from having dirt on every person in power/law postition why was he surprised when their dirts were revealed???#and why did he still hold power over them when their secrets where already out?#it just made no sense that he could just give any official position to anyone.#i havent even scartched the surface#there are so many loose ends and plot holes in this show I could do a 2 hour video essay on it#and im sorry hiu was the least charismatic character lee jungi has ever played and it wasnt his fault. hes played detective and lawyer befo#he wasn't new to the genre and role. the writing and directing of that drama was a complete waste of his talent#and the killer guy.. bro... both hui and the other posecuter he almost killed saw his face and they made zero effort to find him?#didn't he like explicitly say he's working for cho? why didn't that it kid who was there not film what was happening??#anyway <3#im watching samdalri now... my expectations are on the floor#i simply cannot be let down.#niki screaming into the void
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running-in-the-dark · 10 months ago
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.
#hahaha okay well. that last post. with the song title. made me check if there's a music video for that song because I like it#and there is#and I didn't know I wanted to see Corey Taylor pole dancing but. I'm glad I did?#also fascinated by the comments under the video#because oh my god I'm sorry but he has never really been particularly attractive to me before#but he sure as fuck is now#like yeah man I won't forget seeing him in that outfit but that is a very good thing imo#anyway. I love stone sour okay. and I guess he's hot now. that's confusing lol#that's unfortunate. people with fucking amazing voices should never be hot too. it's too much 😔#noooo. and he's short too?? come on don't do this to me#I'm never allowed to look at him again#personal#(how the fuck did I manage to never really look at him in. idk 17 years? very very unfortunate that it had to happen now.)#(okay tbh I get it. I was always distracted by his neck. that sure is. a neck. I mean. I appreciate it. nice neck. but. distracting.)#yeah yeah it's just the issues again. it's fine he can be hot. whatever#(and I have just been reminded why I don't like slipknot. forgot how absolutely fucking terrified I am of those masks :) good to know. won't#ever look up pictures of him again! that also explains why I didn't really ever look at him that much. there were like. maybe 3? stone sour#music videos whenever I liked them. and it was before YouTube. so. if I saw those I saw them way later. so. probably saw like the pictures#in the cd booklets if there were any. don't remember 🤔 but anyway yeah I most likely just never saw his face that much. interesting.)
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envy-of-the-apple · 1 month ago
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Third Wheel
Dark!SatoSugu x reader
(Warnings: Yandere, dark content, dark, misogynistic language, delusional behavior, kidnapping, blood, violence, +ShokoHime x reader, choking (not in the sexy way tho), threesomes, oral!F!recieving)
Synopsis: Regardless of what Satoru and Suguru tell you, you've always felt left out in this relationship. But when you leave, you quickly find out there's no line your ex-lovers won't cross to get you back
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When you come home that night, they're already cuddled together, watching TV. 
It's cute. Your boyfriends were always so loose with their affection. When Suguru was cooking, Satoru would lean on his back, more than happy to talk his ear off. Suguru would hold Satoru's waist, steadying him, being his anchor. At night, you'd catch them reaching for each other, trying to hold hands even in their sleep. 
It's clear to even the blind: they are soulmates. 
And you were just extra baggage. 
You don't know how you caught their eyes, but this past year was fun. They've been sweet, both of them have. Inviting you into their lives, into their home, into their bed. Everything moved so fast, but you didn't mind. You were young and a bit spontaneous. Two beautiful men showing a glimpse of interest in you wasn't something you could pass up. This was nice, while it lasted. 
But unlike them, you aren't forever. Their bond would never come close to anything they could have with you. 
It took a while for you to accept that, but eventually, you did. 
"Hey, babe," Satoru calls. "Rough day?" He lazily waves you over. Suguru grunts, before shifting over to make space. 
Despite it all, you're a coward. You don't announce it; you just stare at them. Fondly. Yes, this was nice. You don't think you could handle telling them, though; that would be too much. Seeing how little they cared would break you. 
"Yeah." You give. "Rough day." 
You weave through the house. It's theirs. Not yours. That they've made clear. You're an afterthought. It's the little things. Their toothbrushes are together, yours on the other side of the sink. Their shoes were neatly stacked side by side, and yours were always tucked away in a corner. Left out. Forgotten. Why wouldn't it be like that? They've been together for years. You were still an outsider. 
You only have a little to grab. You just grab your extra clothes, the hair clips you have a terrible habit of leaving around. Just a few items. And then the bedroom looks like you'd never been there at all. 
When you come back out, they don't notice your suitcase. Satoru laughs loudly at something happening on screen. Suguru chides him sternly. Good. It's better this way, you think as you take your suitcase to your car. You don't need any additional heartbreak. 
You make a few more rounds, collecting everything you need. Suguru only catches you when you are about to leave their house forever. 
"Angel?" He calls. "Where are you going?" 
He's looking at you, head tilted in mild curiosity. You manage to smile, looking down at your car keys. 
"Out for a drive." You shrug. "I'll be back." 
Suguru takes it at face value. He lets you go with a small 'have fun'. The walk to the car is heavy. Metal dumbbells on your shoulders. 
When you get in the seat, you finally allow yourself to sob. 
~
I'm sorry, I just can't do this anymore
That's how you ended the wall of text before blocking them. It was the coward's way out. 
"No." Utahime's quick to tell you. "It's the only way. Those bastards would've never let you go otherwise." 
You shouldn't be so quick to listen to her, considering she hates them both. Still, she was more than happy to offer you her home while you picked yourself back up, and started looking for an apartment. You'll humor her for the time being. 
"She's right," Shoko pipes up. Her dark circles are even more prominent tonight. You guiltily think it has more to do with you than with her patients, but she and Utahime have insisted that you stay with them. 
"It was for my sake, more than theirs." You say honestly, tucking yourself into the couch. "They...don't care about me. At least, not like they do each other." 
Utahime rolls her eyes. "You are blind." She says. "Those two were obsessed with you. I'm just glad you got out while you could." 
You laugh, but it beats crying all over again. Utahime doesn't find what she said as funny. She chides you again, something about being oblivious before she settles down to watch the movie she put on. Shoko falls asleep right at the intermission. Her head falls against your shoulder. Utahime leans against you too. And it's nice to have friends to fill the void they left. 
~
Satoru appears first. 
You woke up later than you would have liked. Your eyes are itchy and red from crying all night. Utahime was more than happy to give you her guestroom, but you know you can't take advantage of her kindness for too long. Tomorrow, you'll start apartment hunting. 
Today, you'd sit on the couch and eat ice cream. 
When you go downstairs, you hear a hushed whisper. Utahime's by the door, using her body to keep someone out. She looks angry. 
"-No one's here but me. Now get the fuck off my property." She seethes. 
You recognize his voice. You aren't ready. "Have you heard anything? Anything at all?" 
"No." Utahime gripes. "So go, Gojo-" 
He catches your eyes. Your heart gets stuck in your throat. 
He's taller than her. It takes little to no effort to barrel through her body, easily shoving her aside to get to you. You flinch, his touch burns when he grabs you, pulling you into his arms. 
"Oh, baby." He sighs into your hair. "There you are. Missed you." 
It's too soon. You aren't ready. You can still feel the emotions bubble up from that night, when you collapsed in Utahime's arms, sobbing your heart out. This wasn't fair. They never made it fair. 
You cast a glance at Utahime. She was scowling, close to boiling right over the edge. It gives you enough strength to try to push Gojo off, but he only lets go, when he wants to. 
"Okay." He smiles, reaching down to grab your hand. "C'mon. Let's go home. You had us both so worried for a sec, but if we explain everything to Suguru it'll be okay." 
You find your voice then. As well as your strength. His grip on your hand isn't all that tight. It slips away when you gently shake him off. Satoru stops, confused. 
"Satoru..." You start. "Didn't you get my text?" 
He rolls his shoulders, agitated. "Yeah, but-but it doesn't matter." 
There it was. His lovable personality. Casual careless, nonchalance. For once, you aren't annoyed by it. Maybe your grief made you numb to it. 
"I did mean it," you say as plainly as you can, "every word." 
He freezes. You smile at Utahime. 
"Could you give us some time?" You ask. 
She frowns, but she's never been able to say no to you. 
"Ten minutes." She finally says, before she's marching back to the kitchen. You still hear her muttering while leading Satoru back to your room. 
"I'm sorry." He says when the door shuts behind him. 
"For what?" 
He runs a hand through his hair, taking off those glasses he loves so much. You can't look him in the eyes for too long. It brings up too many memories. 
"I fucked up, right?" He says, he sounds desperate. You've never heard him sound like this before. "I'm sorry. I dunno what I did, but I'm sorry." 
You shrug, picking at the lint of your sleeves. "You didn't do anything. I just...it felt like a good point to just-" 
"-Leave us?" He cuts in. "Come home, baby. I'm so sorry, just come home and we'll figure this out." You look away because you can feel the tears burn up. 
"You didn't do anything." You insist, but your voice is weaker. 
"Was it Suguru? Did he do some bullshit?" Satoru interrogates. "What'd he do? I'll kick his ass, I promise." You hide your smile underneath your sleeves. 
"He didn't do anything either," you assure, "neither of you did." 
He's getting more and more desperate. "Then why did you leave us? What's wrong with us? Why can't we go home and talk this out? Please come back, baby; home doesn't feel like home without you." 
Isn't this what you wanted? A confession. Evidence that they wanted you just as much as they wanted each other. Satoru certainly did. Suguru did, too, considering how hurt Satoru implied him to be. A week ago, you might have been over the moon, too wallowed in self-pity to do anything but agree, run back into their arms, and willingly sink back into 2nd place all over again. 
But the thought of going back to their home makes you feel sick. 
"I can't." You decide. "I just can't. It's over, Satoru." 
I'm sorry. You keep that last line to yourself because you're too scared to crack in front of him. Shatter. Splinter. 
Satoru doesn't share the same sentiment. You hear movement, and when you look up, he's crying. 
A part of you wants to hug him, but you hold yourself back because he isn't yours anymore, and maybe he never was. Still, it hurts seeing him like this. The piece of you that still wanted him is ready to forgive and forget. Your vindictiveness keeps it at bay. 
"That's not fucking fair." He's saying through his tears, even when he's crying, he's beautiful, "You-you can't just ditch us like this. You don't get it; we can't live without you. It's killing us; you're killing us, baby." He staggers forward, in a way that makes you afraid he might fall. In the end, he just collapses on the bed. Eventually, you take a seat next to him. 
He's looking around, you catch him eyeing the pile of clothes in the laundry basket. The hair ties on top of the drawer. The plushies on the bed. You think it might finally be starting to sink that that you're truly gone. 
"Suguru can't sleep these days, y'know that?" He starts, a sardonic laugh in his throat. "He pretends to, but he can't. He stays up all night just wishing you'd come home. The guy is miserable without you, and you can't even gimme a fucking answer." 
His voice cuts you just the way it's supposed to. You wince, feeling his words slice into his skin, finding their way into your heart. You look at his shoes for a moment. He didn't bother to remove them. Maybe that's another reason why Utahime was so pissed. 
"I was starting to feel like an afterthought with you two." You speak. "I mean, it makes sense, you two were together, first. I thought the barrier would just take time to go away....but then it didn't." 
How many times has Suguru taken Satoru's hand over yours? How many times has Satoru forgotten your drink but not Suguru's? How many inside jokes you didn't understand? You always felt petty for being jealous over the tiniest things, but those tiny things kept getting bigger and bigger until it felt like they'd been purposely building that barrier themselves.
You were sick of feeling like the third wheel in your relationship. 
"Baby..." Satoru's voice is tinged in guilt and you can't look at him because you can feel the tears start to well up. "I-I didn't realize." He grabs your hand. 
"Come home." He pleads. "We'll fix it, I promise. We'll be better. We'll do better." 
You shake your head, slipping away from his grip. 
"It's too late." Your voice is shaky. Please let him not notice. Please, please, please for once can his oblivious about everything but his one and only work in your favor? "You can't fix anything, Satoru. Not now." 
"You haven't even given us a chance to-" 
"You should go." You stand up. Satoru follows you out the door. Utahime's already outside. She catches your eyes and nods. 
"Gojo." She speaks, tone clipped. "Get the fuck out of my house." 
He stills, frozen like the prettiest painting in the world. His eyes turn to ice as he stares at her. Utahime doesn't budge. If anything, she advances, pulling you close, acting like a human barrier between you and your ex-boyfriend. You take it immediately, nestling into her side, taking refuge from his icy stare. 
There's silence. You only relax when you hear his footsteps fade and the door slams ricochets into the apartment. And that's when you break down into Utahime's arms completely, letting her coo you into comfort. 
"Maybe I am being overdramatic," you say when Shoko comes back later that day. Utahime was enraged since Satoru left, pacing around the apartment. It's only after both you and Shoko coaxed her back into the couch that she calms down enough to take a seat next to you. 
"Maybe this whole thing is ridiculous. I-I should just go back and-"
"No." Shoko is immediately saying voice firm. "Absolutely Not." 
You can smell the hint of smoke when she came back from the hospital. You try not to assume it's because of you. 
"No way in hell are we letting you go back there after what he did." Utahime gripes. 
"He didn't do anything." You argue. "I swear, I-I was just...being pathetic." 
Warm hands lift your head up. You struggle, still shuddering from your sobs as Utahime forces you to look at her. 
Her eyes are brown. Not as glittery as Satoru's, who's eyes shine like the burning sun itself. Not like Suguru, with his celestial purple. No, hers are just brown. 
You didn't realize how beautiful brown eyes could be. Not just the color of home; the color of chocolate; the color of brownies. The way the light cast down at them made them deep and dark, like a night sky. If you looked closer, you could see tiny stars swimming around. 
"Listen. Are you listening?" When you nod, her voice softens. She tucks your hair behind your ear. 
"You deserve better." She insists. "You deserve better than them. So so much better. I know you can't see it right now, but there is better out there waiting for you." Her voice loses all momentum all at once. "Just...trust me, okay?" 
Her desperation to be heard makes you smile a bit. You nod. Her frown loosens, just the tiniest bit. She relaxes. 
"Thanks," you say after a beat. "I...I needed that. I'm glad I have goods friends." 
Utahime's hands drop from your face. She collapses into the couch cushions with a groan. Shoko laughs. 
"Told you." Shoko says, mirth and alcohol on her tongue. 
Utahime flips her off, and Shoko takes her place. She settles into your side. 
"They were assholes." She tells you. "Forget about them. And she's right, you deserve better." 
You were glad they were there for you, even when you weren't there for yourself. It felt nice that they cared. Vouched, Advocated for your comfort. They made better boyfriends than your old boyfriends ever did. Their support helped heal the Satoru and Suguru-sized holes left in your heart. Every day became a bit better. 
When Suguru eventually turned up, you were a bit more prepared. 
He's a bit nicer than Satoru was. He actually knocks, instead of relentlessly pounding on the door. He doesn't barrel through Shoko when he spots you cowering behind her. His face betrays nothing. He's still. A polite smile is stretched on his lips. Shoko isn't happy about letting him into her home, but when she glances at you, you nod. You needed to do this. You needed closure. 
And so did Suguru. 
You don't speak to him until you're shut in your room. Geto cuts the silence first. 
"How have you been?" He asks nicely. 
"Good." You respond. "You?" 
"Good." 
Conversation stilts. You don't know what to say. Luckily, your ex is never the man who stays silent for long. 
"How's living with Shoko and Utahime been?" He asks, "I'm surprised you've put up with them for this long. They were pretty scary in high school." 
"I bet you two were scarier." You counter. 
He smiles. It's soft, looks good on him. You find yourself smiling back. When you take a seat on the the of the bed, he doesn't follow. You don't know whether to feel glad or not. 
"Yeah, I'm not the proudest of those times." He admits with a sheepish laugh. 
It dies down, and you know the artificial barrier between you two has broken. You shift, waiting for the inevitable. 
"Satoru told me what happened." He sighs. "I'm sorry, Angel. We-I didn't know how you felt. Everything was so perfect, I just thought you felt the same." 
"It's fine." You assure, and this time, your throat doesn't clog up, and your eyes don't feel itchy. "Really. It's-it's fine." 
"It's not." Suguru shakes his head. "You'd be in bed with us if it were." 
That comment pricks something deep within your skin. You swallow, turning away from his piercing purple eyes. They were much like Satoru's. Breathtaking, you could stare at them for hours. You used to. 
But now, you don't have that desire anymore. 
And maybe now that you aren't so attached, maybe you could try being a little more honest. 
"I was jealous." You finally admit. "I couldn't help it. I-I always felt like I was fighting within my relationship. You two were so much closer to each other than I was. Than I ever could be, honestly." 
Suguru frowns, troubled. 
"That's not true." He insists, soft, but something's burning underneath his tone. "Satoru and I have history, but that doesn't mean-" 
"I was runner-up." You cut him off. "For both of you. Looking back, I'm not really upset. It was always impossible for anything to come between the two of you. This-" You gesture between you and him "-was always inevitable." 
"It's my fault." You smile at him, hoping it comes across as sincere as you feel. "I couldn't stand being second place." 
He moves then, kneeling in front of you. Eyes the widest you've ever seen them. He catches your hands in his. You let him. A parting gift. 
"Angel." He starts. "We never once thought of you as that." 
You shrug. "It doesn't matter." You reply. "It's how I always felt. You can't really change the way I feel about things, Suguru." 
You think he's realizing that he's beginning to lose you. His grip gets tighter as if he can physically keep you with him at the very least. He shifts until he's right at your knees, looking up at you desperately. 
"Come back." He insists, abandoning his persuasions. "Just...come back. At least for a little while? We can try again, can't we? Just give us a second chance?" 
It's strange, they don't look too similar, but you can see the similarities. Wow, they're just perfect for each other, aren't they? Yin and Yang. Two halves; one whole. 
You were always a leftover. You just had to learn that the hard way, through days of heartbreak, crying, and sobbing your heart out. It took you awhile to understand that the affection they had for each other is different from the affection they had for you. 
You shake your head. His hands nearly crush yours. 
"I love you." 
It takes you a while to figure out what he said. When it does sink in, your world tilts. Your heart stops at his abrupt declaration and you must stare at him because why? At first, you think he's just desperate: lovebombing. And then you look into his eyes, his sincerity. No, he means it. It makes you feel worse. 
"Satoru does, too, but you know him-he'd rather die than admit something like that." Suguru gives a bitter laugh, one you find familiar even after all this time. "I've always wanted to tell you but thought it was too soon. I thought we had all the time in the world." His voice tapers so he doesn't have to say the obvious but clearly you three didn't. 
You want to reach over, tuck a stray lock behind his ear but you stop yourself because he isn't yours anymore. You gave it all away when you ran. Instead, you curl your hands around his in silent understanding. 
You don't know how you didn't realize it before, but Suguru is less put together than usual. His hair is typically well-groomed and shiny, but now you see split ends. His eyes are clear and bright, but today...they aren't. A dull purple. Hazy violet. 
He's miserable. 
You did this. This was all you. 
"Satoru misses you," he says, "always had. Barely smiles anymore. I don't think I can blame him." 
They loved you. They love you. This was all what you wanted. Just a bit of recognition. There's a tiny part of you that's still itching to jump back in Suguru's arms, kiss him until you're out of breath 'just kidding! it was a prank! let's go home!' and then you two would leave hand-in-hand back to Satoru. 
Going back to them would make them happy, but not you.
But Shoko was right. You deserved better. 
 "It'll get better." You assure. "You'll heal." 
Day by day, the cracks in your heart start to seal. Bit by bit. It may never heal over completely, but you know you'll be okay one day. And they'll be alright too. Who knows, maybe in a couple years, you'll all laugh at this. 
Suguru shakes his head and stands up. His eyes are just the bit glassy, but he's blinking them away before anything gives. It's just like him, honestly, so you're not too upset. 
"You don't get it." He's smiling, not quite in humor. "I don't think you'll ever do but..." He trails off, mid-thought. 
"But what?" You press. 
Then he sighs and closes his eyes. When he looks at you again, his signature pleasantly cold smile is on his face. 
"I did all I could, I think." He turns around, abrupt. "I'll see myself out." 
You're caught off-guard by his sudden departure, but by the time you're following him, Shoko's already leading him out the front door, locking it with exasperation. 
"Is that it?" She asks. "They won't be barging in anytime soon, right?" 
You stare out the window, watching as Suguru gets in his car. Something bubbled in your stomach. 
~
It was one of those nights. Shoko had come back early. Utahime was back from the school. You had planned a cute little evening for the girls and a relaxing night in. You had everything: wine, freshly-prepared dinner, a cheesy horror movie, and an announcement you're sure they were more than happy to hear.
You had just settled down the blanket when you hear Shoko come through the door. You take off her coat before she can even touch it, excitedly flitting around her. 
"What's gotten you in such a good mood?" Shoko asks, her dark circles even more profound than before. You don't have to feel guilty about those for long. 
"You'll see!" You chirp back. 
Utahime strolls out of the bathroom, fresh from the shower. Her hair is still wet. You'll ask if you can blow dry it later. 
"That's what you've been saying for nearly an hour now." Utahime groans. "Just tell us already. Or at least, me."
"Patience." You chastise. "But, it's a good surprise, I promise." 
She's not satisfied, but she sits down anyway. They eat dinner, complimenting your skills all the while. You preen at their praise. It's a stark contrast between Suguru and Satoru, how cold they'd often been whenever you did something nice for them: tilted smiles, less-than-receptive words of 'oh baby you didn't have to'. 
As you lived with both couples, you can see the similarities. Utahime's temper is close to Satoru's, but that's where the similarities stop. She's more serious and less likely to blow off your feelings with a playful huff. Shoko and Suguru share the same laid-back personality, but Shoko is always there to listen to you instead of cutting you off with condescending sympathy. 
Wow, maybe Satoru and Suguru were a little more shitty than you initially thought. 
Eventually, the night draws to a close. They're drunk, full, and smiling. Perfect. You clear your throat just when Shoko refills her fourth glass. 
"Again, I'd really like to thank you for letting me stay." You start. "It meant so much to me to have two amazing people to support me like this. So, thank you." 
Utahime smiles. "Don't thank us," she says, "again, you can stay for as long as you want-forever, honestly!" 
You nod. "Well, I don't think I have to do that anymore." 
Shoko freezes mid-sip. 
"What?" She asks. 
"I talked to my parents." You tell them, oblivious to their stone faces. "And I'm going to move back in with them, just until I get back on my feet. Isn't that great? Now, you two won't have to-" 
You stop when you finally notice how cold they look. Utahime looks close to tears. 
"What's wrong?" You ask. 
"You're leaving?" Utahime asks, her voice nearly cracks. "Why?" 
That...wasn't what you were expecting. Shouldn't they be glad the third wheel is finally out of their house? Why does Utahime look so heartbroken? Why is Shoko so quiet? What was going on?
"Isn't-isn't this what you wanted?" You fumble with your words. "Now, you don't have to share the house with me anymore. It'll be just the two of you again." 
They exchange glances, and it reminds you of those secret conversations Suguru and Satoru used to have. Except this time, you can read their faces. 
"What if...we don't want it to be just the two of us anymore?" Shoko starts, hesitant, reproachful like she's approaching a scared wild animal. 
Your eyebrows scrunch. "I don't understand." 
At that, Utahime drops her head in her hands. "Oh, c'mon! We've been doing this for weeks! You can't be that oblivious-" 
And then, she stops herself. Looks at you. You stare right back, and the three of you have the exact same realization at the exact same time. 
"Oh." You breathe. 
"Oh." Utahime whispers. 
"We're all idiots." Shoko says behind her glass. 
"Wait wait. Hold on." You backtrack. "You-you two want...with me?" 
"Yes!" Utahime exclaims. "Yes! God, now everything makes sense. I thought you were just trying to let us down gently, but this whole time you just weren't even paying attention!" 
"No." You argue, face hot. "You two were just really subtle." 
"We all sleep in the same room, these days." Shoko lists. "'Hime sat on your lap with nothing on but a bra and panties." 
"I thought we were just doing friend things!" 
"What kinds of friends sit on your lap, half-naked?" Utahime asks, mortified. 
"I-I-" You give up. 
All this time. You were mourning over something you lost months ago, even when there was something blooming right under your nose. God, you're an idiot. 
Hands. They clasp your own. You look up into Utahime's pretty brown eyes. 
"We want you to stay." She whispers. "We want you." You take a glance at Shoko. 
"Do you want us?" 
You take a deep breath. 
You nod. 
She's smiling, and then Utahime's kissing you. Soft, so soft, nothing like the possessive kisses Satoru gives you. It's innocent and adoring and you find yourself melting into her completely. 
Utahime disappears and before you can mourn her warmth, Shoko's lips join yours. You can smell the alcohol, the slightest sting of cigarettes. You don't mind it. Her kisses are nothing like Suguru's, all powerful and domineering. She takes what you give her, asking ever so nicely for more. 
You break away, panting. 
"You good?" She asks. 
You nod. 
"Good." Shoko hums. "Cuz we're gonna fuck you now." 
"What?" 
Shoko pushes you down on the couch. You land with an oomph before Utahime's descends on you with a flurry of kisses. 
"Waited so long to do this, baby." She's sighing into your lips, fiddling with your shirt so she can pull it off. "Weeks and weeks." 
She pulls down one of your bra cups, massaging at your tits. You hadn't had action in so long, so you eagerly encouraged her movements, kissing her back with just as much fervor. Shoko takes her place next to her girlfriend, pawing at your other tit. 
"Look." Shoko purrs. "One for each of us." Her soft mouth sucks on your nipple, swirling it around her mouth. Your head leans back with a pleasant sigh. 
"Feel good?" Utahime asks. "She's good with her tongue, isn't she?" 
"Yes," you nod, and Utahime gives out a delighted giggle, peppering your face with kisses. You gasp when you feel her hand shift through your shorts, palming at your dripping pussy. 
"Poor thing." Utahime's cooing, and there's a brief hint of mockery in her tone. You've never heard that before. It turns you on even more. "They never gave you attention back there did they?" She circles your clit. "They were too busy sucking each other's dicks to pay attention to such a pretty pussy." 
Shoko pops off your tits, shifting down. She kisses her way to your stomach. You blearily watch as she adjusts herself until she's right at your shorts. Utahime follows her lead, tugging off your shorts. Your panties go next. 
And then you're staring down at them with trepid anticipation. 
"I meant what I said." Shoko says softly. "You deserve better. You deserve someone who cares for you." 
"You deserve us." With that, She and Utahime latch onto your pussy. 
They're everywhere. You have to stop yourself from cumming right then and there, arching your back as one of them sucks on your clit while the other licks into your hole. She manages to stick her tongue inside of you, and it's enough to shoot sparks through your eyes. 
"So tight." Utahime's hissing into your cunt. "Sho, after this, you wanna try to fuck this pussy with your strap?" 
There's a soft laugh, and Shoko pulls away from your clit to answer, much to your disappointment. You whine, thrusting your hips in the air. She stills you with a hush. 
"I don't think we're ready just yet." She hums. "Yet." 
When you glance down, they both are making out with your clit. It's debaucherous. Their soft lips are connected, your tiny bud locked in the middle as their spit trickles down into your pussy. Utahime groans and when you look further down, you realize she's touching herself. 
You don't know which part of this makes you cum, but you cum. It's the hardest you've ever orgasmed. There's so much stimulation that your hips buck up, trying to chase the sparks of pleasure. They let you, licking you through your orgasm. 
When you come down, your thighs fall apart, splayed against the soft cushions. Utahime still isn't finished, licking at your clit. You shudder at the overstimulation, whining until Shoko is pulling her off of you by her hair. 
"Good, baby?" She asks, crawling back up to you. You kiss her as an answer. She melts in delight. 
You break the kiss, glancing over at Utahime. 
Taking the silent request, she kisses you again. You can taste yourself on her lips. You don't mind it. For some reason, it's sweeter on Utahime's tongue. 
When she breaks away, she stares at you, face soft. "You're staying, right?" She asks you. "You'll stay with us? Because after this, I don't think we could ever let you go." 
You give a shy nod, and Utahime beams. 
"Then, you're ours now," Shoko says, settling into your side. "And we're yours. Always." 
"Always." You breathe, content, happy. You could almost go to sleep. 
Shoko slaps your thigh. 
"Not yet." She warns before propping you up. "First, I want you to sit on my face." 
Hours later, you wake up delightfully sore in bed. The two girls are curled up next to you. When you move, you can still feel the bruises Utahime left. You never knew she liked to bite so much. 
You can't even begin to remember what happened, but you don't regret any of it. Hours and hours had passed as they fucked you and fucked each other, and you fucked them. 
Shoko shifts beside you. She was always a light sleeper. 
"Awake?" She asks. 
"Yeah." You softly say back. 
She hums, shifting a little more to face you. Utahime's behind you, arms protectively curled around your waist. At your voice, her eyes twitch. 
"Shut up." She grumbles, but her arms cinch around your waist. 
Shoko stretches as she rises up. You miss her body warmth but you don't mind the view she gives as she saunters over to the dresser, pulling on some clothes. 
"I'm gonna get food." 
Utahime mumbles out her order. You say nothing because you don't want to come in between them, and then Shoko looks at you. 
"What do you want?" She prompts. 
You blink, and when you answer, Shoko smiles, and then she's out the door. 
The interaction makes your heart warm. 
Still, it can't last. 
When you go to get up, Utahime protests, grabbing your wrist. 
"And where are you going?" She prods. 
You fumble. "Back to my room?" 
"What? Why?" Utahime demands with a frown. "What's the point, you're already with us, now." 
"Oh." You blink, but you give in and slink back into bed. "Is...this really okay?" 
"For God's sake, " she hisses, but you don't count it against her because Utahime has always been a little grumpy after waking up. "Yes. We're obsessed with you. How are you so blind?" 
"We want you, and we're not like them." Her voice drops in disdain. "We'll treat you better. You're ours now. You're mine." 
"Yours." You repeat, something warm fluttering in your belly. 
"You can't leave, we'd go crazy, okay?" She seriously tells you. "If someone else takes you away, I'd lose it. And Shoko is okay with murder." 
You laugh. 
"That's not a joke." She warns. 
"I know." And you kiss her again. 
It's like that for a couple weeks. You live in peaceful domestic bliss with two wonderful girlfriends. Now that you're in an actual loving relationship, you can't tell why you ever contemplated ever going back to Satoru and Suguru. Shoko actually talked to you about your feelings. Utahime cared about your input. You weren't treated like an afterthought, second place. 
They were with each other longer than they had been with you, but they never made you feel like you had to fight for your relationship. Speaking off Satoru and Suguru, they never once contacted you after their first two attempts. They'd clearly given up. 
Everything was just perfect. 
And then, it just wasn't. 
You were in bed with them. Fifteen minutes ago, Utahime shuffled off to go to the bathroom. She still wasn't back. Half asleep, Shoko grumbled. 
"She's probably in there fighting a cockroach." She complains, but she rises anyway. "Sleep, I'll be back." She kisses you on the cheek, and then she's gone. 
Their body warmth fades, but they stay because they're tired. These days, you can't really sleep without them, so you wait for the girls to return. Two minutes pass. Then, five. Then, ten. By then, the bed is cold. 
You open your eyes, sitting up. It's so quiet. Are they okay? 
You pull off the comforter, stepping onto the cold wooden floor. The apartment feels strangely...haunted somehow. The air felt heavier now, thick with an invisible tension, like the house itself was holding its breath. It must be because you feel alone, you're sure of it. 
The bedroom leads to a dark hallway. As you make your way down, you can hear something. Voices? Murmuring. The relief almost makes you laugh. Seriously, what were you even afraid about? 
The living room is horrific. 
They look dead. You can't tell if they're breathing or not. Shoko's eyes are closed. Utahime's limp body is sprawled across the floor. There's blood on the wooden panels. 
Suguru doesn't even blink. 
"You're awake." He says it so casually, like waking up to your ex-boyfriends mauling your girlfriends is normal. 
"What..." Your voice fails, you weakly try again. "What did you two do?" 
Satoru answers, smiling with glinty teeth. 
"Isn't it obvious? We're getting rid of the competition." 
You don't understand, your brain hasn't caught up yet, you still think you can talk to these psychos. 
"It's their fault." Satoru's still smiling, but there's nothing happy about his tone. He's carrying a knife. There's blood on it. "It's all their fault. They manipulated you into breaking up with us, baby. That's how these useless sluts got you into their arms." He spits on Utahime's hair. You cover your face with your hands. 
"But, it's not like you aren't at fault, Baby." He points the knife at you. "You left us for them. I'm not letting you off the hook for that." 
You don't know what he's saying. His movements scare you, his eyes, the knife. When you glance at Suguru, you don't know what you're expecting. 
But you know you aren't expecting...that. 
His purple eyes are icy cold. Utterly devoid of any emotion. You don't think you're staring at a person, anymore. 
"You lied," Suguru says, "You lied about us not giving you enough attention. You just wanted to leave us. For them." 
You step back. They step forward. 
Those bastards would've never let you go otherwise. Utahime warned you. Looking at her limp body, you wondered if she thought they'd ever go this far. 
"I didn't." You weakly insist. "I-I wasn't lying about anything! It-it wasn't like I wanted to leave-" 
"Stop lying," Gojo insists. "Stop fucking lying already." 
He smiles again. 
"It's okay, baby. I know you'll come back with us. Right after we're done dealing with these two whores." 
"You'll belong to us." Suguru promises and he steps on Shoko's hands. "Just like always."
They were both crazy. Nothing could get through to them. Now, you would sit there and watch them maul the only things in your life that made you feel complete. 
The worst part is that everything was your fault. 
Shoko's pinky twitches. You can see Utahime take shallow breathes.
And you speak. 
"I'm sorry." 
Your weak voice makes them stop in their tracks. Satoru glances at you, Suguru does too. You can't convince them. The only thing you can do is play into their delusions. 
"You're right." You say, the tears finally feeling useful. "I just wanted to leave. I-I was just bored. I wanted something new." Suguru's lips curl and you quickly move on. "But-but the more I stayed with them, the more I realized...how much I missed you two." 
Satoru halts. You caught him. 
"I did." You stress, carefully making your way to him on feet that were close to dropping at any minute. "Every day, I thought about you two." You reach out, touching his face with shaky fingers. "I really really wanted to come back, but I was afra-afraid you wouldn't...want me back."
Satoru reaches up to touch your hand. His fingers are cold. You resist the urge to shudder. 
"You missed us?" He wonders. 
The lie feels like sand. 
"More than anything." 
His kiss is violent. He crushes you with his grip, touching and biting and everything you hate. You squeeze your eyes shut, letting him suck your soul dry. 
"Don't kill them." You whisper when he finally pulls away. "Please don't kill them. Everything was my fault." 
Satoru's face is pensive. His gaze drifts off to Suguru's. Those silent conversations you hated so much. 
Then, Satoru gives a delighted sigh. 
"You're lucky. I love you so much." He kisses your nose, before pushing you in Suguru's arms. 
"I'll clean up here. Suguru, go back to the truck." He demands. 
You don't fight, letting Suguru drag you away. Shoko and Utahime live in apartments, but you're afraid if you scream, Satoru might change his mind and gut them anyway. Before Suguru leads you off, you catch Gojo scoffing before he kicks at Utahime's face. You gasp and pray that when Shoko wakes up, she'll be coherent enough to call for an ambulance. 
I'm sorry, you tell them. I'm so so sorry. 
Suguru pushes you into the backseat of their vehicle. You obediently take a seat. 
"You shouldn't have left." He tells you. "You should've stayed." 
His face is cold, but his tone betrays the tiniest tremor. If you weren't so scared, you'd laugh. The irony is that he's the one who feels wronged here. 
"I'm sorry," you say anyway. 
He hums, not quite satisfied with your answer. 
"You aren't." He responds, and you hate how well he knows your tells. 
And then, he grins. 
"But you will be."
Hands reach out, gripping your neck. You flail immediately as Suguru cuts of your oxygen. You can't breathe. You can't fucking breathe. No matter how tightly you squeeze onto his wrist, digging your nails into his hands, clawing at his face. He keeps you still, keeping you there as you grow weaker. Your vision gets blurry. Your attempts get sluggish. There's a kiss on your forehead, and you black out completely. 
~
You wake up in a room you've never seen before. And your neck is sore. 
The pain drifts in as soon as consciousness does. You feel like you have a hangover, your head throbs, your eyes struggle to remain open. You can't go back to sleep either, not when it hurts so much. 
The panic doesn't settle in until you catch the cuffs on either one of your legs, keeping you attached to the bedpost. Silver chains, with enough lead to let you move around a bit. The cuffs are padded so you don't rub yourself raw. You don't care about the thoughtfulness. 
They're in the room with you, watching with silent eyes. Nausea builds up in your stomach, and you wonder how long they'd stayed there, just watching you. 
You miss Shoko. You miss Utahime. You missed people who actually loved you. 
Not these two. Monsters that lied and pretended, but deep down, they were just too selfish to share. 
"You were out for a while." Suguru comments. 
"I told you to use the syringe," Satoru remarks, but he doesn't sound too upset. At his voice, Suguru laughs. 
You shift in your spot. Suguru takes that as an invitation. He sits at the edge of the bed, watching you with satisfied eyes. You must look pathetic: shivering, in tears. He reaches up, catching your tears with his finger.
"So cute." And then he frowns. "You know why we're doing this, yes? You were bad. You need to be punished."
"I'm sorry." It's all you can say. You feel like a broken record, doomed to repetition over and over again.
"You aren't. You should stop lying." Suguru says sweetly. "But I'm sure, a couple hours in your new home will help you think about how much you hurt us."
You wanted to scream, but you can't cuz your throat still hurts from Suguru's hands, and you know he's not above putting his hands on you this time. Maybe he never was, you just never saw this side of him until you made him snap.
"You're leaving?" You stumble, moving as they back away but the chains only take you so far. There are no windows, and when Suguru shuts the light off, the only thing that's keeping you from the dark entirely is the light emitting out the hallway.
"Wait." You beg. "Please. Wait, don't-don't leave me here. I'm sorry. This is scary. I'm scared."
Satoru hesitates at your broken voice. Like a shark smelling blood, you pounce.
"Satoru, please."
"If you keep coddling, then the lesson will never be learned." Suguru warns.
Satoru stares at you. He's not wearing his sunglasses. You can see him for what he is now.
"I love you." He says it so sincerely, you almost believe it. "This is for your own good."
The door shuts, and everything goes dark.
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oepionie · 5 months ago
Text
— "HE'S THE OTHER MAN!" . the corpse groom
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SYNOPSIS: A ghost groom has claimed MC as his unwilling bride. Unfortunately for him, she's already got a lover
⊹ [ c.w ] — violence, possessive behavior, malleus blows a fucking green laser down ramshackle, mentions of blood, yuu is poor but we alrdy knew that, papa crewel crumbs
⊹ [ w.c ] — 1.6k opening post with malleus! if this gets enough attention, I might do more :P
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"You what?" Crewel seethed, eyes wide as an unsettling smile stretched across the red of his cheeks.
"Repeat that."
"I…I accidentally released that ghost from the spellbook," Grim sobbed, his glossy eyes reflecting both fear and guilt as he looked up at the imposing figure of the professor. "And he's taken my henchhuman as his bride!"
Oh, Great Sevens. Not again.
Crewel groaned, his hands reaching up to frantically rub at his burning eyes. The flickering candlelight cast erratic shadows across his face.
"Please, do tell. How in Wonderland did someone with your lackluster skills manage to—" The professor was abruptly cut off by a loud, almost obnoxious cry that echoed from the doorway. Turning sharply, Crewel saw Crowley hunched against the entrance frame, hysterically sobbing into his palms. Fat tears dripped beneath his ornate mask, glistening in the low light. "They grow up so fast! My dear child is already getting married!"
Crewel's eye twitched as he took in the scene: Grim shaking like a leaf, and Crowley, dramatically weeping, pathetically looking to him for a solution.
"Fools," Crewel snarled, striding out of the room as he fished his phone from his coat pocket. "If you two won't be of use, then I'll have to enlist the help of those mutts instead."
The day had started like any other in Ramshackle, but you certainly didn't expect it to end with a wedding. Surrounded by the ghostly residents of the dorm, you stood dressed in all white, a bouquet clutched in your hand. Curling in yourself, you sighed and rested your head in your hands, avoiding everyone's gazes which felt like icy needles on your skin.
Ramshackle's old lounge, with its worn-out floorboards and faded wallpaper, was the chosen venue for your ceremony. Whispers rustled through the gathering, carried on a faint breeze that stirred the dust motes in the dim light. Somewhere in the background, the somber notes of an organ piano echoed. You didn't even know you had a piano…
"Dear?"
Jumping with a shriek, you whipped your head around. A ghostly visage, bathed in a deathly pale blue glow, hovered inches from your face, an unnaturally wide grin stretched across their blue lips. Bony fingers gently traced up your cheeks, sending tingles down your spine.
With sunken eyes and high, sharp cheekbones, Elizan—a "visiting" friend of one of Ramshackle's ghosts—was truly a sight to behold. His complexion had a pallor that matched the moonlight filtering through the decrepit windows of the form. Wisps of long, flowing indigo hair framed his face, swept back as if caught in a breeze that only he could feel.
"You look wonderful," he cooed, pressing a featherlight kiss to your forehead, leaving your cheeks burning.
"Ah. Thank you," you stammered, averting your gaze and gently pulling away. You could hardly focus on the words being spoken to you, your mind spinning with the surrealness of it all.
"You look... Good as well," you forced out with a cough, tugging at your hair nervously. "But... Listen... I—"
Before you could finish, the door to the entrance slammed open, nearly breaking off the hinges with a sound that could wake the dead, sending cracks spider-webbing through the already dilapidated walls.
On the inside, you screamed louder than the hinges.
You had painstakingly patched up the door after Grim's recent screw-up—a feat that had tested your patience and carpentry skills to their limit. Unless you wanted to survive on a diet of stale canned food and cafeteria leftovers for another year, you couldn't afford any more repairs.
While you were busy mourning the loss of having decent meals, heaving and leaning against the door for support, your friends called out your name in a panic, their bleary and furious gazes zeroing in on your figure. Clad in white, you stood there, the perfect picture of a pretty blushing bride.
The uninvited guests didn't go unnoticed by your "groom," and in seconds, you were pulled into a suffocating grip. Elizan's usually serene demeanor shattered like fragile glass. His deathly pale features contorted into a snarl, veins pulsing ominously beneath translucent skin. His typically gentle eyes blazed with an unsettling fire, icy whites now narrowed and piercing.
"Mutt!" Crewel seethed, his foot slamming into the floor and shattering the newly installed tiles. Your soul nearly left your body as you screamed inside again. There go a thousand thaumarks…
"What in the Sevens is this!?" Crewel shrieked, running a gloved hand through his tousled hair. With sharp movements, he pointed a finger at Elizan. "I'll have you know I can have you arrested for trespassing, unlawful detention, and violating the sanctity of this academy!"
"How... How dare you? Barging into this sacred ceremony—Who even are you?!" Elizan snapped back, his arms coiling tightly around your torso. The crowd erupted in a haze of shouts and muddled answers. Unable to understand anything, Elizan's intense gaze shifted and bore into yours, demanding answers. You gulped nervously, suddenly feeling small and vulnerable in his grasp.
"Who is he?! Who are they?!" he barked like a dog, flashing his sharp fangs at you.
"Uh… That's my professor—uh, Crewel," you stammered, your voice barely audible over the pounding of your heart. "And those are… They're my… friends?" Your gaze flickered to the group of men who had entered, their expressions ranging from confusion to anger.
Elizan's wide eyes now filled with shock, white orbs glossed over with luminescent blue tears. He pushed you away as if you had burnt him, recoiling from your touch as though it pained him physically.
"You know other men?!" the ghost cried out, his hands clenching into fists, his midnight blue hair cascading wildly around his face like a tempestuous sea. The tortured cries of the groom echoed through the room, sending a shiver down your spine as you awkwardly shifted on your feet, feeling like a character caught in an soap drama.
"…Yes?" you replied, unsure.
"How could you do this to me?!" He sobbed, a dark shadow covering his face. "Running off on an affair the DAY of our marriage?!"
"Well, that's a rather dramatic accusation—" you started, but Elizan shook his head in anguish.
"Answer me! Do you have another man?!" His voice shook the room, and you took a few cautious steps back.
"Elizan, please," you uttered gently, your eyes darting nervously toward one of the men in the room.
Your lover didn't meet your gaze; instead, his eyes were locked onto the ghost, a storm of emotions brewing beneath his features. As you jumped down from the makeshift podium, you shot an apologetic frown at the ghost, hoping to diffuse the escalating situation. "Don't you understand? You're the other man."
"No! You're married to me!" Elizan shrieked, lunging forward in a frenzy, his nails clawing at the air as if trying to grasp something intangible. "Whoever he is—He's the other man!"
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MALLEUS DRACONIA
"Whoever he is—He's the other man!"
Lilia raised an eyebrow with a chuckle, his form reclined against a fogged-up window of the room. The weather was gloomy and stormy, the skies tinted green outside, casting an eerie glow over the scene. The window pane, streaked with raindrops and mist, blurred the view of the turbulent skies beyond. Lilia hummed a tune under his breath, a calm figure amidst the brewing storm.
With a sidelong glance, his eyes locked onto Malleus, whose entire figure shook with a barely contained wrath that threatened to engulf the very air around him. The young prince's chest heaved in violent, choked breaths as smoke wisped from his mouth and nose—tendrils of flames flickering amidst the swirling dust and ash.
A deafening crack tore through the air as a vivid surge of green emerald lightning erupted from the heavens, descending upon the roof of the venue with explosive force. The blast of energy painted the sky with a blinding flash of green as it crashed into the building, sending broken glass and wood raining down upon the venue.
Cursing, Elizan moved you both aside, a large chunk of debris hurtling past, narrowly missing your startled form. As more debris crashed down, he shielded you with an outstretched arm, a shimmering barrier briefly forming to deflect a particularly large piece of wood.
"Spectral pest," Malleus seethed, his eyes aglow with an eerie green hue as his nails elongated into sharp claws. With a click of his tongue, he raised his hands, summoning thorns that spiraled towards Elizan, ensnaring the ghost in their sharp embrace. Simultaneously, from the floorboards below, vines emerged like serpents, their tendrils gently but firmly pulling you away from Elizan's protective embrace and guiding you into the safety of Malleus's arms.
"How—?! Ngh!" Elizan writhed against the thorny vines. The prickly tendrils twisted around him like serpents, their sharp points digging into his ghostly flesh.
Malleus paid no mind to the struggling spirit, keeping his gaze fixed on you as he checked for any signs of harm. His expression softened with relief upon finding you unscathed, albeit a bit dusty.
"Beloved," he murmured, his voice a soothing balm amidst the lingering chaos. His gloved hand moved delicately, sweeping away the clinging dust from your shoulders and arms. Pressing a tender kiss to your forehead, his lips lingered there briefly, conveying a warmth that contrasted starkly with the raw power he had displayed moments ago.
"Are you alright?"
Blinking up at him with wide eyes and frazzled hair shooting up in every direction, you nodded dumbly. Turning away from him, you nearly gasped aloud to see the room in shambles, debris scattered everywhere, and the eerie green glow of energy still lingering in the air. The ghostly residents were in a state of panic, their translucent forms flickering as they moved frantically.
"My dorm," you whimpered, your mind racing as you calculated the cost of the damage.
With a chuckle, Malleus adjusted his grip on you, his muscles flexing as he gently set you down. Your legs felt shaky as you tried to steady yourself.
"I will handle the cost of repair, my dearest," Malleus assured you, bending down to your height, his voice dropping to a whisper. Green eyes bore into yours, strands of his midnight hair falling over his face. "You will not need to worry about such things once we are formally betrothed."
You froze, your face suddenly warming and burning.
"What?!"
Malleus reached out, gently tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers lingering against your cheek, claws dragging across your supple cheeks. "Yes, my dear," he murmured, chest rumbling as his lips curved into a sharp smile. "You heard me correctly."
"I… I don't know what to say," you whispered, feeling dizzy with emotion.
"Will you consider it?" he asked softly, a faint hint of a smirk playing on his lips. "Please?"
Caught in the depth of his gaze, you felt your resolve melting away. "I-I guess?" you breathed, your voice trembling. "I'll… consider it."
A smug smile spread across his face, and he tenderly pressed his lips against yours. "That's all I ask, my dearest."
After ensuring you were alright one last time, Malleus redirected his focus to Elizan. With a flick of his wrist, the thorns under his control tightened around the ghost. Elizan shrieked and thrashed about, his translucent form writhing in pain as the thorns dug deeper.
"Do try to exercise some restraint, my boy," Lilia drawled, tapping his sharp fingers idly against his crossed arms. "We do not want Ramshackle to be bathed in blood. It would be very unsanitary."
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not too sure if i am continuing but feel free to suggest some peepl bookies
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