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leafsbabe · 9 months ago

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Travis Kelce - private show (SMUT)

2k, there is a butt plug in this in case you don't like that

He loved his team, he truly did, but Travis was also very glad when their post-training meeting was over and he could dip. None of his teammates tried to stop him as he all but ran out of the room, something he was grateful for. In the past it had been a given that he would walk out with some of the other men, talking, joking, but nowadays that had become a rare sight. He was always in a rush to get back to his room, back to the closest thing he had ever come to an addiction.

Away games hadn't been the same ever since he had stumbled across that fateful link.

By some lucky coincidence the facilities for the visiting team in the field they’d be playing tomorrow were absolute ass so the chiefs had rented out one of the hotel meeting rooms for their review. Meaning all Travis had to do to get back to his room was hop onto an elevator. After that he was free to lock himself in his room until it was time for dinner.

The elevator crawled up to his floor at a snail's pace but he stopped himself from impatiently rocking back and forth on the soles of his feet. When it finally came to a stop he started to squeeze out of the elevator before the doors had fully opened but he didn’t even care how it looked, he was already late and he didn’t want to miss any more.

The door to his room slammed shut behind him as he stormed in, jumping onto the bed with enough energy that realistically it should have broken but by some miracle stayed intact as he opened his carefully changed laptop while attempting to toe off his shoes.

The website didn’t automatically open once he clicked on his browser but he had been visiting it religiously to the point that it autofilled after a single letter. His pants started to feel too tight before the site had even finished loading and Travis couldn’t help but groan at the realisation that he fucking pavloved himself into getting a semi at the mere thought of you.

The stream had already started but hopefully he didn’t miss much. A familiar background greeted him before his eyes focused in on you. Splayed across the bed you’re a sight for sore eyes, hair messed up just enough to let him know you’d played with it before he logged on, body clad in next to nothing. A new, expensive next to nothing. Good to know all of the money he sent you got put to good use.

He waited for you to greet him like you usually did, surely you must have noticed him joining your stream, he was your biggest fan after all, but when you didn’t he sent you a message over private chat. Expensive, yes, but he didn’t need people knowing his dirty little secrets.

Finally you acknowledged him.

“Hi bigyeti, nice of you to join again.” It seemed like a standard greeting but he knew by your tone that you were annoyed at him for being late again. Brat. Travis watched you slide a hand over your bare skin until it reached the lace covering your chest. But instead of teasing one of your hard nipples through the material or even taking it off to show the irresistible swell of your chest you just ran your fingers over the seam at the edge of your bra. “As much as I think this set is cute, this will probably be the last time you’ll see me in it. It’s not really comfortable and I can barely get it closed by myself.”

You were probably hoping for messages offering to help you with that but Travis had been watching long enough to read between the lines. You were going to offer up the set but beat you to it. His simple message didn't get a written reply but he noticed you look off screen before smiling. “You know the price bigyeti.”

You didn’t take it off though, just changed positions until you were kneeling on the bed. It was only then that Travis noticed the selection of toys laid out in front of you.

“What do you think,” you picked up one of them, dark purple and intriguing, but not his favorite of the spread. “Should we run a poll or let the highest bidder decide?”

He sent you a rack before you even had time to decide, after which he finally rid himself of his sweats and underwear.

“You know which one.” Your sweet voice read his message in the chat, laughing as you held up the one you knew he wanted. Pale pink with ridges that could get you off every time, filling you up perfectly before the vibrations took you out. The first time he had watched you use it you had squirted and he had been hooked ever since.

“Should I be concerned big? You seem to like this little guy more than me.” You pouted at the camera, bringing the vibe up and tapping it against your bottom lip.

Travis groaned before typing again. Hopefully this would be a one handed operation soon.

“You know you’re my favorite. Aww that’s so sweet of you yeti. Want to know a secret?” He watched you lean forward, holding your chest into the camera with practiced ease. “You’re my favorite too.”

Travis slowly stroked himself as you bit your lip, reaching behind you and finally freeing yourself from the lace. You had been truthful about how ill fitting it was, his eyes automatically drawn to the red indents on the side of your boobs. He fantasized about getting his mouth on them, of soothing your flesh with his tongue.

You didn’t try to act sexy as you balled up the bra and threw it off-cam, something he came to enjoy. You were this temptress, bane of his bank account and object of his desire, but you were also human.

As he saw you kneeling there Travis finally gave in and reached for his lube, because he was in his thirties now and using lotion to jack off felt awfully juvenile. He watched you run your hands over your body, just palming himself to the view of you playing with your nipples.

“We’re going to try something new today.”

The tone of your voice had him shifting, sitting up straighter and paying more attention. He didn’t have to wait long to find out what something new meant. You got rid of the last remaining hint of nothing hiding your skin before turning around into the most perfect reverse cowgirl POV he knew and there it was. Nestled between your cheeks laid a small plug with a deep red gem at the end that sparkled in the lights you used during your shows. A hot shudder ran through him as the grip he had on himself tightened.

“You know what to do if you like it.” You smiled at the cam over your shoulder before turning back around.

Travis debated between finally touching himself properly and sending you another donation when you positioned the toy he picked and he relented. He’d just send you another tip later. He was slow with his movements, teasing himself as you sank down on the toy. You stopped halfway, adjusting to the stretch, but Travis just continued to stroke his dick.

You were noisy, he liked that about the streams. You weren’t holding back but it also didn’t feel like you were putting on a show. You were simply vocal in bed and he loved it.

Treavis continued to work himself as he watched you ride the toy, torn between closing his eyes and imagining it was you that had a hand wrapped around his dick or even riding it and wanting to watch you take your pleasure with the toy on stream. He watched you move, the way you stretched around the toy with every rise and fall. It was mesmerizing, the shimmer of that salacious gem catching his eye only for his focus to be drawn away by the flex of your thick thighs, or the dimples on your lower back, or those sweet filthy moans that kept on leaving your mouth. He felt drunk on you, drunk on the fire running through him.

There was no rhythm to the way Travis was stroking his cock as he watched you, all pretense of following your movements abandoned long ago. He felt his orgasm approaching, considering for a moment whether he should try and draw it out, to wait for you and come together, before giving that idea up and quickening his pace. He came to the sound of your moans, all over his fist and with his head thrown back in ecstasy.

Travis let himself float only until the next moan tore his attention back to the screen in front of him. You were barely riding the toy at this point, grinding more than anything. Even with his muddled mind it was clear that you were on the brink yourself.

When you finally tipped over it was with a shout. Your legs shook, more violently than he had ever seen from you before, while your body contracted around the sex toys filling you up. He palmed his softening cock as he watched you fall apart, too spent to try getting another orgasm out of it but still wired enough to draw out that afterglow for just a little while longer.

He watched as your orgasm came to an end, the shaking in your thighs never quite stopping even though the vibrations of your toy did. You removed the pink vibrator but that bejeweled plug stayed in place as you slowly turned around and sat in full view of the cam, leaning back on your hands and smiling. You were still breathing heavily but it only drew attention to your tits and Travis found himself reaching for his phone before he realized that his hand was covered in his cum and used his other one instead. He wasn’t good at typing with his nondominant hand but another tip found itself being sent your way soon enough anyway.

“That was fun.” You said, breathless but still smiling. No reaction to his message if you had even seen it. “We should do this again sometime.”

Travis got another long look at your body as you leaned forward to shut off the cam and then he was alone in his hotel room again.

Shutting his laptop before he got up, Travis went to wash his hands and clean up a bit of the mess around his dick. He would shower soon but there was something he had to take care of before that. His phone was still laid on the bed, even though he had to search through the sheets to find it.

Travis pulled up that all too familiar contact and pressed video call. You answered almost immediately, makeup still on your face but with your hair pulled back and a shirt thrown over your body.

“Was that good?” You asked as soon as the call connected. He could see you bite your lip, nervously, and he hated being so far away from you even more.

“You were perfect.” He answered, truthfully. “So hot, baby. Almost makes me want to set you up a real camming account just to show you off.”

The program you two had now was little more than a private video chat but Travis had tried to set it up nicely for you. It had involved a lot of awkward questions to one of the New Height techies but the chat worked amazing for your little cam show and your audience of one.

You just laughed at his antics. “No you wouldn’t.”

“No I wouldn’t.” He relented. “I don’t like to share, even if you’re the most gorgeous girl I’ve ever seen. And all mine.”

You laughed again. “All yours.” You confirmed before continuing, teasing him with an account of the new things you had brought for the two of you to try. Fuck. He couldn’t wait to come home.

#travis kelce #football imagine #football smut #nfl imagine #nfl smut #travis kelce imagine #travis kelce smut #...so this is twenty-five

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eggedbellies · 11 months ago

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This is an idea I’ve RPd with people (and would love to again if anyone wanted to…) and i just cannot stop thinking about.

The idea of men, instead of carrying seminal fluid and sperm in their testicles, carried eggs. They’re small and unfertilized, but must be spent every month or they’ll grow larger and potentially cause complications. Public sex and public laying of these eggs has become acceptable.

You meet a guy on a dating website, purely for sex. He comes over, and soon thereafter you’re making out on the couch and he comes clean. He reveals a massive set of testicles, full of eggs, likely from 3 or 4 months of build up. He came over with the intention of filling you up with them. It’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, and before you know it you’re being bent over your kitchen counter with his cock in your pussy.

It’s not long before he pauses, a groan on his lips as eggs start pouring out of him. You can feel them, one by one, as they stretch you passing through him. Your hand cradles your belly as it slowly grows with the eggs being placed inside. By the time he’s done (and you’ve cum a time or two) you have the belly of a 4 month pregnancy. You exchange numbers and he walks away.

About a week or two later, the eggs have grown and grown. You’re waddling around with the belly of a 10 month pregnancy with triplets. You feel the sexiest you have ever felt. But, the time has come to lay your eggs.

You go to a public park, set up underneath a tree in the back, and strip. You’re completely naked, legs spread open, and start to push. The eggs come one after one, much larger than when they went into you. By the time you’re done, you’ve laid 30 unfertilized eggs. A small crowd has gathered to watch you, some men slowly rubbing their cocks. And among the crowd is the man who put the eggs inside of you in the first place, ready to put another clutch in you right then and there.

(I held onto this one a while just to keep reading it ngl. god.)

I'd heard of men who did this. It had never held much interest to me, before; sure, I'd been tempted, now and again, in a few relationships, to take their eggs - but I was always a little shy. And I always had work, or maybe personal hangups... maybe that was why I'd never held a relationship for long. And those strange guys, the ones who liked their balls being packed and tender, who wanted to stretch people out... I'd never really understood until I met him.

And they'd looked so good on him, so heavy and full. Slapping against my clit with each thrust. The stretch, god, I'd never felt anything like it, and with the noises he and I were making, it felt like animal breeding. He must have loved it as much as me. How my shirts didn't fit quite right, forced to wear loose jumpers until I could get some maternity wear, the fascinated stares of people clearly wondering how I could possibly be so late term and yet not have them already...

I'm glad it's summer, because even my normal tops are rapidly becoming crop tops. It's hard work to heft my body about. Everything has widened to help with the weight. People come over and ask how far in I am and I try to be vague but not moan whenever they ask to rub and feel the clutch (and I can't help but say yes.)

As the last egg is popping out, and bystanders come to help scoop up the clutch, offer to call my partner, take me to the hospital, whatever I need, I shake my head. I know what I need. Call him from the crowd. There are murmurs, of course, but my body is still shaking with pleasure. We drop the clutch off. Waddle home. Pin him to the wall, all mouth and tongue, biting at skin and clutching at each other, drag him upstairs... and grasp his cock firmly.

Before clipping the cage around it.

Because these last few weeks, I realised just how good that felt. And I grin, even as his eyes widen in alarm. "How long did you wait last time?" I whisper against his neck. "Four months." he murmurs back. "I think we can wait for six." I grin, stroking his balls, before stepping back and admiring how good the cage looks on his thick cock. "Then we can see how big I can really get, hm?"

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accidentally-in-fictional-love · 2 months ago

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Making it official: ⚡🩹🔞(<- always i just can't help myself) Feel free to use this if you want to, or write anything else really. I'm sure I'll love it regardless, Lightning has already taken root in my heart.

You Light The Sky, I'll Bring The Rain - Lightning/Reader

Warnings: No use of Y/N, gender-neutral reader, semi-spoilers for the movie but nothing actually main plot related, friends with benefits, one-sided pining (or is it?), lots of heavy talk, blowjobs, smut.

Wordcount: 8060

Summary: You've never liked Lightning. He was a bit of a snob, acted like he was too good for you, and always ever called when he needed something. No, you've never ever liked Lighting. But it was the man he used to be that always made you come when he called.

Notes: Switching up my queue just once because if I don't write for this man asap I'll explode. I fell in love with him at once, DD did such an amazing job as usual, I was smitten in the theatre once again and I can't stop thinking about him so here's a filled request for those who already love him~ I do plan on writing him a longer fic, but I need to settle on that plot first since I apparently love him enough to ship with /)w(\ so I gave that original idea to Addy, but I hope you enjoy this in the meantime 💗💗💗

You didn't know why you kept coming back to him. He was different now, much different than the man you knew back in college when you were stuck next to each other in your programming class, from his contacts to his clothes to even his haircut. He still painted his nails, that never changed, and he kept the ring you gave him the night you were walking around town and randomly found it on the ground. You still remember picking it up and trying it on, it was unwanted trash you could turn into something loved again; he seemed to latch on to what you said about it, and he'd gone quiet when you’d slipped it onto his finger and it'd fit him better than you.

That was years ago, he had a high paying job now and little time for you as a result, always busy with the meetings and parties and people surrounding him, so when he called you up one Friday night you expected it to be just another simple ‘hello,’ ‘I miss the old days,’ and maybe, ‘I miss you.’

‘Everyone's busy tonight, you wanna hang out or something? I know this new age tea place just around the corner from where I work, great vibes, you'll love their blends,’ came his soft voice from the other side, much softer than it used to be when you knew him before; he was too old to be talking like this, but you guessed this was another fake thing about him now, something calm and cool and easily approachable so his true self underneath wouldn't scare anyone else away.

‘Hey, Leo,’ you said instead of answering him, your phone placed on your desk while you typed away at your current project, which was honestly taking much longer than it needed to because your boss refused to listen to some nerdy coder trying to fix his company's website.

‘That's not my name.’

‘I'm not calling you Lightning,’ you replied flatly, you'd already had this conversation a million times before ever since he started his job and changed everything about himself. ‘If you’d just go ahead and give me literally any reason why I should other than, “AIA says all the kids nowadays are doing it,” then maybe I would, but I’m not calling a grown man Lightning because his artificial intelligence wants to brand him as cool, not because it’s something you actually chose for yourself.’

‘Can you at least call me that around my friends? I don't want anyone to be confused, or start calling me that too,’ he muttered, just a hint of his old self slipping through the cracks for a moment.

‘Fine, so did you actually wanna hang out or do you just want someone to get new age tea with you tonight?’ He'd done this before, on slow nights when there was no one else to turn to, there you always were, like a lighthouse in his storm of a life; maybe he was a Lightning, after all.

He went silent at your question, but this was all part of the conversation now, the casual exchange between you two that always happened whenever he needed you, and he took no offense to your tone anymore, just as you stopped hurting when you became the last resort instead of the first. ‘I… want someone with me,’ he admitted, he was getting faster with it since you started calling him out, but there was sadness in his words, it was another bad night, something his so-called new friends wouldn't know about. ‘I visited the hospital again today.’

You saved your project and picked up your phone, already heading to the bedroom to get changed. ‘Was it bad?’ you asked as you raided your closet, needing something to match his new style so he could at least feel comfortable, you wouldn't embarrass him by dressing the same way he used to this time, not tonight.

‘The job helps, you know the paycheck pays for all of it now,’ he started, not wanting to get to the hard part, and you didn't rush him as you found your nicest, hippest shirt you'd bought for work. ‘It's still progressing, AIA said the new treatment would help but she warned me-’

‘You're following the advice of an AI, remember that,’ you murmured so softly you weren't sure if he'd even hear it, but he did anyway, and you heard him clear his throat almost uncomfortably.

‘She did the calculations, she’s smart, so much smarter than you know, it’s so much more advanced than everything we learned in class,’ he told you yet again, but you’d believe it when you stopped seeing posts online about AIs saying human things just because that’s what they were taught to do. ‘The meds help, but… it’s gotten to the point where I can’t leave the house without it.’

‘Please, just come with me to the oncologist who helped my uncle.’

‘AIA said Dr. Krill was the best in the field.’

‘AIA isn’t real, she can look online and give you all the answers you want, but this is a human being I know who helped someone close to me, he can give you more answers than she ever could-’

‘Can you please just get some fucking tea with me?’ he snapped, stopping you in the middle of pulling on a pair of too tight jeans because that’s what the kids today loved to wear; his voice was loud, brash, emotional, this was the real him again, the one only you saw nowadays, and you sighed and walked over to where your phone sat on your bed. ‘Please, I’m sorry I just… I don’t wanna be alone tonight…’

‘You know I’ll be there soon,’ you said softly, just as quiet as him, and you heard his sigh of relief. ‘Do you want me to meet you at your place, or at the shop?’

‘Work, I’m still there finishing something up, we can walk over when you get here.’ He hung up immediately, no more time to talk, but you couldn’t get annoyed when you couldn’t imagine what he was going through. This was something that’d started right at the end of college, you’d been there since the beginning, and whenever he got an update you were the only one he could tell. After he got his job he’d paid off his family’s home, he was stuck living with his parents because of all this, and now took care of them from afar, the both of you moving to Silicon Valley at his urging because of the job opportunities.

It’d only worked out for him, you thought bitterly as you finished getting ready, your phone in your pocket and your keys in your hand as you headed for your car. He’d been picked randomly out of a group of 50 to participate in a foundling company’s new alternative to Siri and Alexa, but you hadn’t, whatever you’d presented to them they hadn’t liked once they saw him. You hated him for a while after that, but you didn’t now, not when you knew this job was the only thing keeping him alive. You’d talked about it once, what you would’ve done if your positions were reversed and you’d been the one picked, but he’d gone silent when it came to him imagining you in his place.

You thought it’d been jealousy even though he was the winner, the idea of you having everything he had so unfair after a lifetime of being overlooked, so terrifying even in its fantasy, that he never even entertained the idea for fun. ‘Never change, just be happy where you are,’ he’d told you that night as you lay on the roof of his building, the thing a giant, sprawling cage where you were only allowed to enter the stairwell, that was it. You turned your head to face him, and when he did the same back, you realized that you didn’t recognize him anymore.

You pulled up to that same building, needing to pay the meter since you had no access to the lot as a visitor after closing, and you saw him waiting by the door for you; he was talking to someone else on the phone, his back slouched against the wall and his free hand waving around as he spoke, but his voice was still soft even in his apparent distress, enough so that you couldn’t make out a word he said. You waved to get his attention when he started to pace, and he quickly said goodbye to his caller before readjusting his earpiece and walking calmly over to you.

‘Partner troubles?’ you joked only because you knew he was single, he always made sure to let you know whenever he was sleeping with someone again.

‘Doctor,’ he answered stiffly, and your laugh died in your throat with a rough cough. ‘C’mon, they’re open late but they stop serving food around 10, I haven’t eaten today.’

‘Old habits die hard, even with all the money in the world,’ you sighed as he fixed his collar and made sure he looked presentable again, but he had nothing to say to that one. ‘I see you’re wearing glasses again?’

He looked down at his detachable glasses where they hung against his chest, and he lifted them up and reattached them so they sat on the bridge of his nose. ‘Got the surgery a while back, these are fake,’ he admitted, but he at least looked a bit more like his old self with them on, as dumb as they looked.

‘Now all you need to do is fix your bangs, then you’ll be recognizable again,’ you teased, reaching up to mess with his hair, but he leaned away seriously, he wouldn't let you make him look disheveled when he was out and about. It killed the mood a bit, and his glasses were placed against his chest again as you walked, the tea shop just a few blocks away like he promised but not nearly close enough all the same. You weren’t fond of places like this, everything was always way too expensive and bragged too much about their superior blends compared to other chain businesses, but they were always the same in the end.

He gave the barista a small wave as he approached the counter, and she did the same to him, but there was no comfortable familiarity in their actions, just them going through the motions. You didn’t hear what he ordered, there were too many words and he wanted it way too specific for someone who used to down cup after cup of black coffee like it was water, so by the time it was your turn you weren’t sure if you should ask for the same and just accept whatever it was, or attempt to come up with something yourself. He gave you a nudge when you took too long, and you just smiled and glanced at the menu again.

‘I’ll just have a water for now, I’ll decide in a bit,’ you told her, and she rolled her eyes and got started on his order all the same. He wasn't happy with that, but you weren’t going to pretend you could understand the gibberish hanging above you. You examined it more closely, you were never much of a tea drinker to begin with, but he wanted the company, so by the time your small cup of overpriced and outsourced mineral water was placed in front of you, you downed it and asked for the only kind of tea you recognized. She rolled her eyes again at your simplicity, but you were there for him, by the time you came back she’d probably be working somewhere else, none of this mattered.

You took your order and grabbed a corner booth while his sandwich was being made, he never liked to sit near windows, and he surprised you again when he walked right past you and grabbed the empty table by the door. You let out a small breath and joined him without a word, and even though he picked his seat he still looked uncomfortable as he popped open the tab and took a sip. Your tea was still too hot so you just let it sit, preferring to watch him and take in all the other things he’d changed now that he was in front of you.

You already knew it’d be weird to get used to him just never wearing glasses anymore, he usually wore them when he was around you to save a pair of contacts, the only piece of that part of him the fake ones hanging around his neck. You reached across the table and took them while he ate, knowing he’d be unable to stop you lest he risk wrecking his sandwich, and you put them on and stared through slightly smudged plastic lenses at him. ‘Give them back,’ he said softly once he’d swallowed, but he didn't look too in a rush when he saw the way they looked on you.

‘These are the same frames from before,’ you noted, taking them off to pull them apart and put them back together a few times to test the magnets within, ‘the ones you wore when we graduated.’

‘They looked vintage, it makes for a good accessory,’ he simply said before he took another bite, a small sip of tea just barely washing it down; maybe he didn’t even like the taste, like it was something else AIA had recommended to him as part of his cleanse to keep him as healthy as possible.

‘Well, you did graduate what, two decades ago? Pretty vintage now if you ask me,’ you stated, his age making him wince even though it was a testament to how he was still here, still breathing. ‘So, how much did the surgery set you back this time?’

‘The company paid for it, actually, I just had to fill out a few forms and explain why it was beneficial for me to be able to see without assistance, and I was booked the next day,’ he said as he finished eating, a slightly larger sip this time making the wince return, he truly didn’t like it.

‘Sounds nice, you know how long it took me to even see a doctor to fix my carpal tunnel.’ You weren’t bitter about it anymore, but he glanced at you all the same.

‘You know I would’ve been able to help had you come to me,’ he reminded you, he always did when you brought it up, and again you declined it even though it was long over and done with.

‘And you know I never would’ve been able to pay you back if you’d taken me to one of those fancy doctors who charge by the minute.’ You tried your own tea but it was still a bit too hot, it burning your tongue a little, and even then you could taste that it was more water than tea, flavourless drivel.

‘I’ve never once asked you to pay me back,’ he said seriously as he sat up, his relaxed posture changing into something more stiff until the wince returned and he sat back again, his hand going to his stomach. ‘Sorry- I apologize for raising my voice, that was rude,’ he corrected himself quickly, and it was almost frustrating to see him like this, maybe this would be the last time, for real. ‘But you know I wouldn’t have asked it from you, just like you never did from me.’

‘So that’s what this is, one big payback for all the times I flipped the bill, drove you into town for every appointment when you could barely stand, sat by you until they kicked me out for the night, is that it?’ His eyes met yours, and you saw him again in them as he reached for your hand; you didn’t move away, just waited for him to touch you when he stopped, glanced towards the counter like he was afraid of anyone seeing him be an actual person again.

He made the motion to push his hair behind his left ear even though it was so short now, his earpiece blinking to signal a call that he then silenced, and he distracted himself with more bad tea until he was ready to answer you. ‘It was never about that,’ he began, but he was looking at the table instead of at you, ‘you know I never kept tabs on any of it, so neither should you.’

‘Then why do we keep doing this, Le- fuck, Lighting? You’ve got a great life now, new job, new friends, new you, why am I still the one thing you hang on to? Because you can tell me the truth? Because I know the real you, and you know that I keep coming back whenever you need someone to talk to about the bad days? I thought AIA could do all that for you now, be your new therapist you can let all that bullshit onto, so unless you tell me why, I’m outta here.’ He was silent while you talked, just listening, and when he didn’t speak you just sighed and stood until he was babbling and reaching for you.

‘Stop, alright, just wait, can we- can I go back to your place tonight? We can talk there, just… not here, not where she can hear us,’ he muttered lowly, his hand covering his face and blocking him from view of the only other person, and you let out another sigh before picking up your tea and motioning for him to get up. He did, his tea brought with him even though he didn’t like it, and you switched with him and headed for the door before he could protest. It was awful, whatever blend he was praising was certainly not this one, but you drank it all the same for him as he caught up to you.

You didn’t speak on the way back to your car, and for a moment you wondered if maybe he’d follow you home when he sat down next to you, his earpiece off and tossed among the change on your dash when your teas filled up the cupholders. This was serious, he always had that stupid thing with him in case of any emergencies, and you didn’t comment on it as you drove back to your apartment. It was nothing fancy like where he probably lived, you still hadn’t gotten to visit him, that was yet another part of his new life you weren’t allowed into, but it was still decent and had a nice view of the water if you did say so yourself.

You parked and he didn’t bring his earpiece with him, even his phone left behind on his seat when you got up to leave. ‘Hey, don’t you need that?’ you asked him before his door could close, and he checked the time before shaking his head and setting it back down. You weren’t going to argue, if someone decided to break into your car you wouldn’t lose much aside from the vehicle compared to his phone full of precious information, but maybe AIA really was that good, maybe she - it - would be able to save it all before anything got leaked.

You pursed your lips and grabbed it after all, just in case, at least the headset would be ignored amongst the change.

He already knew the code to get inside and wasted no time in getting to the elevator, he was in an actual hurry this time, and you felt his phone vibrate in your pocket as soon as you approached him. ‘Oh, here, don’t want you losing your job over something stupid like a data breach if this gets stolen,’ you said as you tossed it to him, no photo under the caller ID as someone called Melody tried to get a hold of him, and he stared at it before hanging up on her.

‘I don’t want to talk to anyone else tonight,’ he whispered as he shut off his phone entirely and shoved it into his pockets, and by the time you reached your floor he’d asked you to do the same. Something felt wrong as you approached your door, he was never this disconnected anymore, and you only had a second to open your mouth to ask what was wrong when he pressed you against your door and kissed you urgently as soon as you shut it.

You were used to this, every time it got bad he came to you for something no one else could give him no matter how much time passed, but you couldn’t ignore that pit in your stomach as you groaned uncomfortably against him and pushed him gently away.

‘Not tonight,’ you told him firmly, and he whimpered before trying again anyway, mouthing along your jaw in order to convince you. ‘Leo, please, I’m tired of this…’

‘Just once more, and if you hate me that much I’ll never come back again,’ he whispered desperately against you, the old him showing again and making your chest hurt; this was a part of him you didn’t miss, this part that said this to everyone who didn’t return his feelings, guilted them into a pity trap outside of his sickness, and you ran your hand along the back of his neck before taking him by the hand and leading him to your bedroom as you always did. He made sure to leave his phone and yours by the door though, he didn’t want to be disturbed, and honestly neither did you.

You didn’t let him start up again once your door was shut, but you did start to strip away everything that wasn't him, from his glasses to the fashionable scarf he didn’t need to the necklaces he’d bought at some local craft market because the gems promoted healing, all of these things not the Leo you knew and chipped off one by one until he was just in his shirt and pants. You went for the former next but he stopped you, instead helped you do the same, and when you both had trouble getting out of your too tight pants the mood was lightened when you collapsed onto the bed with them tangled around your legs.

He kissed you again while you laughed, and this time you didn’t argue against it, needing him just as much as he needed this, you always did, which is why you had yet to say no to him before tonight. His kisses felt easier again, this wasn't love but it was still something strong between you, something that he had yet to find a way to replace. His weight was comfortable over you as it always was, your legs wrapped around each other until you were pressed together again, and your fingers ran through his short hair as you let out a dissatisfied moan.

‘I miss your long hair,’ you whispered when you took a breath, and he sighed as he always did when you brought it up.

‘AIA likes it short, says it suits me better based on my face shape,’ he finally explained after many years and many more excuses as to why he supposedly liked it better.

‘AIA doesn't see you like I do.’ He stilled in the middle of kissing from your jaw to your earlobe, and you saw the way his eyes shifted the way they always did when he was doing calculations in his head; you were getting too honest, you hadn’t been able to keep him back then and you knew you could never keep him now, but something about tonight was making you want to try. You played with the hair at the nape of his neck when he looked at you, just waited for him to say something to make this nothing but a mutually beneficial transaction again, just like it'd been that first time years and years ago, and he looked ready to speak when he instead sat up and turned away from you. ‘I'm sorry, alright? I know this isn't anything, I didn't mean to-’

‘They've got me on a stent now,’ he said to the comforter as he played with it, and you sat up next to him and just waited. ‘That's what I saw her about this morning, they just put it in today.’ He lifted up his shirt to show you, and you followed the tube until it disappeared back under the dark fabric. ‘There's a lot I can hide from other partners, but I can't hide this, now that it's this bad I need to do injections every day…’ He gripped his shirt until he pulled it back down, his expression contorting into one of anger instead of misery. ‘I don't get it, I'm better off now, I was able to take care of everyone but myself, why can't I fix myself?’

‘Because you're not broken,’ you insisted firmly, your hands finding his even when he pulled away.

‘Termical fucking cancer sounds pretty broken to me,’ he sneered, disgusted with himself for still being sick after so much money tossed at too many doctors to name over too many years.

‘No, stop it, alright? Just stop, you know I-’

‘What? You what?’

You shoved him onto his back, your hands trembling over his shoulders as you stared down at the slight lift of his shirt where the tube traveled over his skin. ‘You know I've never seen you that way,’ you confessed to him, your honesty finally building up against the dam until it began to overflow, and for once you had his undivided attention without his phone or other people around to interrupt you. ‘Not even at the beginning, before you knew, back when it was just us barely passing that class; we always said it was gunna be us against the world, that if one of us got a job we'd help the other out since it was all so new, and then you…

‘You just had to come out here, and start working for them, and I was so happy for you even when you couldn't get me in cause I knew you were being taken care of. But then, the haircut, and the outfits, and those fucking glasses- who are you? "Lightning”? Who even is that? Because it's not you, I'm the only one who still knows you, Galileo, and I never wanted you to change out here, you never should've had to just to get these people to look at you, because I always have, I always have…’

There it was, everything was laid bare and out in the open for him now, and you shifted so you wouldn't put too much pressure on him knowing that he was hooked up. He didn't speak for the longest time, still doing those calculations before finally he sighed, looked away. You felt cold, and you sat back fully to give him room to sit up again, Leo finding your floor quite interesting as he tried to figure out how to word his thoughts. ‘Changing into this is what's kept me alive for so long,’ he said after what felt like an eternity, and your fists clenched over your knees. ‘You might not like it, and think that I'm different, but ever since AIA helped me fix everything about myself I didn't like I've been happier, healthier, more social.

‘I don't sit around alone anymore, waiting for you to pick up your phone because you've always been miles ahead of me, and I tried, I tried really fucking hard to get them to let you come with me, but you don't want to be where I am, not now that I know what this place is.’ He went silent a moment, gave you a small glance before returning his eyes back to the floor. ‘I know you don't like me anymore, I know it because I'm not stupid, but I never needed you to like me, not as long as you kept- we kept doing…’

His voice went quiet but in a new way, one that wasn't Lightning, but Galileo again, your Leo, and underneath it all you saw that he was still there, still waiting for you just like you'd always been waiting for him. ‘Why did you never say anything?’ you asked carefully, you couldn't mess this up now, and his hand rested over his stomach as he met your eye.

‘Why didn't you?’

You could only stare, he knew why you couldn't, and you knew why he didn't.

‘What do we do now? Can AIA solve this one?’ you tried to joke, but at the mention of her name he steeled; his hands found your wrists as he pulled you back overtop of him, this was new, and your cheeks flushed as you both adjusted until you were sat on his lap for once.

‘She can't solve everything,’ he whispered like he knew something, this was no joke to him, and you linked your fingers with his just so he'd stop frowning like that.

‘Then what do we do? Because if you're content with this, if we do this again, and then tomorrow I'm back to just being the last one you call when the party's over, then… I don't think I can do this anymore, not after what you said.’ You held him hard so he'd know you were serious this time, you'd almost ended it so many times before but it'd never stuck, but you both knew that this time it would if he just said the word.

‘You were never the last one I called, not even tonight,’ he told you, and you felt your heart clench in time with your hands over his.

‘You didn't make that clear enough, y'know,’ you laughed with a small sob, and he reached up to bring your mouth back down to his. This kiss felt different from the rest, it was honest, not just desperate for whatever you had before, and you cherished it deeply as you started to rut against him, ready to continue what you'd started a little less miserably now. He groaned against your mouth until you moved a little too hard, the groan turning from something pleasurable to pained as he broke away to gasp. ‘Sorry, guess we might have to be careful for a while,’ you cringed as he rubbed his stomach with a wince.

‘Just until I'm used to it, they told me that it shouldn't be too obstructive in my daily life,’ he hissed, and you watched him before shifting down until you were parting his legs and finding a comfortable place between them. He watched you back as you toyed with the drawstring of his pants, your eyes fond of what you found as he lifted his shirt with one hand and threaded his fingers through your hair with the other.

‘I've always liked your tummy, but I thought it was too personal to say,’ you confessed as you kissed him just under his belly button, the soft hair there tickling your chin as he let out a nervous chuckle.

‘I know I'm not getting abs anytime soon with this,’ he muttered, he was always so self-conscious about the way he looked back then too, and you gave him another kiss before placing your hand over the one in your hair.

‘Good, lemme keep just this, at least,’ you pleaded so gently that he had no choice but to agree, and when he nodded you took the drawstring between your teeth and pulled it until the small bow was no more. He sighed as you started to strip him in return, his clothes much more loose and relaxed than the outfit you'd chosen, and it was nothing but easy as you freed him of everything until he was bare before you. You got to see the full extent of his chemo like this, and it did hurt to see him still sick after everything he'd been doing to prevent this, but this had to be the final step, didn't it? You'd trust that AI if she was right about this, if her smart algorithmic brain really did do the calculations and found the exact path to the end of all this, because, as you pressed kiss after kiss to his thighs until he was a whimpering mess against your pillows, you didn’t want to imagine life without him.

He wasn't used to being loved, even when this started it'd been hot and heavy and fast until you were sweating in the backseat of his old car; there had been no passion there, just the two of you laying there in fear that you'd just ruined everything if the other didn't feel the same. To avoid that outcome entirely you'd just played it off, made it seem like this was just some drunken fun between two friends, and instead of an afterglow you'd slowly gotten used to him just smoking beside you while you held yourself under the covers and pretended it was his arms around you. You wouldn't let that happen again, not tonight, not tomorrow, not any other night you decided, he was always yours and you were going to make sure that Silicon Valley kept Lightning, because you were going to keep Leo.

You took him into your mouth and started to bob, careful to keep him pressed into the sheets so he wouldn't move around too much, and you enjoyed the view as you glanced up and saw the way his back slightly arched, his eyes shut tight in bliss. It was rare you got to do any kind of foreplay, he was always so busy you tended to get the call, go find him at work, or wait for him to show up so you could quickly fuck and get back to your lives. Only sometimes, when the night was late and his slight touches were getting addicting, did he let you take your time, but never like this.

You'd jerk him off while you watched a movie, and he'd grind against you until you were panting and ready for more, but stuff like this? Where you could worship him slowly and really convey how much you wanted him through your touch, it was almost forbidden. You'd done it only once before, right after he'd gotten the job and you spent the night together to celebrate; he still drank back then, and you'd had too much as you got down on your knees and let him fuck your mouth until it almost came out, the only instance of, ‘I love you,’ that either of you had ever come that close to saying as he painted your tongue and smiling lips white. When he woke up the next morning not remembering the way he'd looked down at you with nothing but love in his eyes, you'd just rolled with it and pretended that you didn't remember either, just another fun night between friends, nothing more had hppened.

You moaned around him until he gripped your hair a little harder, his thighs tensing as he tried not to trap you between his writhing legs, and you lightly dragged your nails over goosebumped skin until his sighs grew louder. If this was really happening, if he was really going to stay instead of going back to his apartment to talk to AIA like she really knew him, then you'd make up for every second you pretended like this wasn't everything to you. You waited until he was just about to come, he was always easy to read in the way his hips would speed up and he'd hold you until you bruised, the only time he left his mark on you because everything else was too intimate, and you dragged your tongue up the underside of his twitching dick before pulling off with a pop.

‘Wh-why’d you stop?’ he moaned as his hips jutted the air to find you again, and you smiled at him before pulling your underwear down your legs and going for the bottle of lube you kept in your bedside dresser. You didn't answer him with words, his hands kept at bay as you placed them on your hips and made him watch as you stretched yourself open, giving him a proper show so he'd really know how badly you wanted him. His eyes started to lid as he thrusted against your inner thigh, just enough to keep him hard, and you got ready to line him up when he stopped you. ‘The condom’s in my wallet, should still be in my pants,’ he let you know, and you just shook your head before sinking down on him until he was almost crying out.

‘Tonight, you're mine, I wanna feel you,’ you whispered as you adjusted to his size, and he desperately clung to you as he felt your tight heat for the first time without the familiar barrier to keep you apart. The stent was still new, you couldn't take him apart the way you always imagined in your wildest fantasies where you'd been able to confess, and he couldn't fuck you as hard as he preferred thanks to the stress of work and pretending to be someone so soft and quiet in order to keep selling himself, but this would be perfect all the same you decided as you chose a spot on his shoulders and started to move. Your nails dug into his skin as you braced yourself on him, matching lines of red spreading out under his own hands on you, your breathing wild until you found a steady pace.

Each time he tried to thrust up you'd slow until he stopped again, a silent warning that was just as torturous on you as it was on him, but no matter what he wouldn't stop to the point where it was making your knees burn from the effort not to move. You begged him to be careful, your voice giving out as he held you a little tighter and got you to slam down a little harder against him, but he just shook his head just like you'd done. ‘You really think… I'm gunna stop now… that I know you're mine?’ he asked directly into your ear when your head dropped down beside his, and any other time you would've shivered from his words but the feeling of the tube brushing against your own stomach was making you nervous.

‘I don't wanna hurt you,’ you whined, but one sweet kiss to your neck shut you up so fast it made your head spin.

‘You've never treated me like I'm fragile before, don't start tonight,’ he implored of you before kissing you again, and only when he sucked a mark that everyone would be able to see did you answer him. You felt him smile against your neck before one arm came up to wrap around your back, his hand sprayed over your neck and trapping you in place as he took a deep breath and started fucking you in earnest, his other hand guiding your hips when you couldn't move at all. You had to fight to keep yourself from laying flat against him, just the bare amount of space between you so you wouldn't shift anything or worse, force the tape to lift right now of all times, and you let him show you just how much he wanted you right back until his hips were speeding up and he was gripping you so hard it was making you keen.

‘Don't pull out, I want everything from you,’ you panted when you felt him slow just a little, he was thinking about it, and he let out the most delectable noise you'd ever heard him make in your life. He sounded like he wanted to argue against it, maybe AIA had filled his head with so much sex ed. that the thought of sleeping with you like this had given him pause, and you sucked in your own deep breath before grabbing on tight and using all your weight to drag him onto his side. This was more like it, you knew he couldn't resist being on top of you especially after your dual confession, and you wrapped your legs around him and forced him to face the fact that he was also starving for this just as you were. You grinned cheekily up at him before he hunched down to kiss your neck again, his stent safe and his core working hard while he finished fucking you.

His hips stuttered to a hard stop as he came inside of you, your entire body shifted up with each final jut of his hips until he was finished, the feeling of his warmth spreading through you while he held you like you were the only thing keeping him grounded enough to push you over the edge. Your fingers curled over his short hair as he shakily lowered himself onto you, your legs unhooking but not letting him go as you wrapped them around his own instead, a silent plea to not get up and start his usual ritual of pulling out his vape now that he also stopped smoking. He obliged not because of you but because he wanted to, his voice soft again as he pushed your bangs out of your eyes and whispered sweet nothings that didn't feel like Leo or Lightning as he said them, maybe there was more of him that he’d never let you see before.

‘Y'know, AIA told me never to tell you, she thought that I'd ruin things,’ he said so quietly you almost couldn’t hear even though you were so close.

‘This is why I know you better than an AI, like how that tea you got tonight sucked ass,’ you finally told him, said tea now long cold on your counter, ‘so maybe you guys should work on making her a mouth so she knows what taste buds are.’

‘It's supposed to be great for my immune system now that I've switched meds,’ he explained, but you waved it off with a grimace.

‘Start injecting it too then, cause I saw your face every time you took a drink,’ you grumbled on his behalf, and he actually laughed a little before he attempted to sit up. ‘No, please, not yet.’

‘It's almost 10, I'm gunna miss my dose,’ was all he had to say to get you to let go, and the feeling of his come running down your thighs was a little less appreciated than you wanted as he walked back to the kitchen. You wiped yourself off on the closet piece of clothing you could find before joining him, the two of you naked and waiting as he took out his meds from his coat pocket. You hesitated before walking over to him, and he looked self-conscious again before allowing you to see what he had to do from now on; you weren't put off in the least, you'd seen him inject himself with worse to numb the pain as his illness got worse and his self-isolation took hold, and when he was done you brushed your fingertips over the spot where skin turned to tape.

‘Don't be ashamed of this, I wanna see you get better,’ you said without looking up, and he let out a shaky sigh that sounded like he might be holding in more than shame.

‘I'll have to get used to doing this at work, people will talk,’ he already dreaded, and you let your hands slide over his waist to his back as you pulled him even closer.

‘Then lie, say it's something new age that they'll easily believe, what's that dumbass thing people are saying now? Where they take like supplements and stuff and call it something stupid.’

‘Biohacking?’

‘Fuck that's so pretentious, just say that shit to anyone who asks and they'll buy it with that haircut, trust me,’ you promised dismissively, but instead of berating you for not only making fun of the people he knew but his hair again, or laughing because he knew it'd be true, he just remained silent. ‘Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to-’

‘You're the only one who's ever honest with me,’ he thought aloud then, and you looked up at him in surprise; for a second you swore you were staring up at the man you knew in college, one blink and he was gone again, but he wasn't gone, he was just older, and looked a little different, but he was still there.

‘It's LA, someone's gotta be a real person down here,’ you joked when you felt yourself get choked up, and you swallowed when his hand cupped your cheek and stopped you from looking away. He kissed you again, and there was no more desperation, no more lies, no more secrets apart from one, one you couldn't find the answer to on his tongue even though you could taste it, and when you heard a small ahem you jumped and covered yourself in a panic from the intruder. ‘The hell-?’

‘Sorry to interrupt, I just wanted to remind you that you have an early day ahead, so staying up too late doing strenuous activities will only delay your sleep and risk you injuring yourself in a most unfortunate manner,’ a stranger's voice from nowhere told you, and you looked wildly around before he walked over to his phone, covered the camera with his finger, and motioned for you to stay back.

‘Thank you, AIA, we were just saying goodnight,’ he told his phone, and your eyes snapped to the device in confusion, hadn't he turned it off? ‘I should be getting home, we're meeting with new potential clients tomorrow and we need to make sure she's fully charged for the trip.’

‘What, no time for a vape session with me out on the balcony?’ You tried not to let your voice waver but of course you failed, of course something would steal him away again now that he was yours.

‘Lightning has actually quit vaping, as the toxins inside do more harm than good based on-’

‘Yes, thank you, I was just gunna say that,’ he cut in before his phone could teach you all about the health hazards of something you didn't even do, and you could see the apology on his face as he kept hiding himself from the camera like she was… watching. ‘Yeah, I don't… I don't do that kinda thing anymore, just drink shitty tea if I feel like torturing myself.’

You laughed, which made him laugh, and for a moment you forgot about his phone until AIA reminded him of the time in case he had no clocks nearby. ‘Y'know, you can always just, spend the night like you used to do, and then we can get up early, maybe grab breakfast at that greasy diner that always manages to make the most perfect bacon while still burning the hell outta their toast,’ you suggested nervously, and he looked down at his phone before shutting it off again, no goodbye to AIA.

‘I haven't had actual bacon in months,’ he revealed as he walked back over to you, and you patted his stomach and started to lead him back to your bedroom.

‘Sounds like you're due, I'll set the alarm, okay? No wakeup calls from nosy AIs needed tomorrow.’ You left him just a moment to grab your own phone, and he frowned at it before nodding, letting you set the alarm so you'd have time to get that breakfast even though the drive was long and he was bound to regret it later when all that grease met the abundance of healthy foods he'd been choking down. You were already looking forward to it, and you didn't notice the way your phone switched to your contacts for just a moment when you set it down, a new name adding itself before it went back to your home screen, your focus only on him as he finally held you under the sheets just the way you'd always wanted.

#Ray's Readers #Ray's Requests #david dastmalchian #lightning afraid #lightning x reader #oh boy I hope that doesn't end up in too many wrong tags #this took me way longer than it should've because I made the mistake of watching a movie with Rhys and OH BOY was my heart torn between the

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heavenlycloud · 1 year ago

Text

the veil~ ღཾཿ༉ ༘჻ღཾཿ჻

three: the face of a cold blooded killer ‧₊˚ ⋅ ༘☆*.ﾟ

warnings: swearing

pairing: huh yunjin x aespa 5th member! fem reader

summary: IT HAPPENS...yunjin and y/n have their long awaited movie date that's not a date that is a date that isn't. yunjin realizes something about y/n and y/n learns something she didn't know before. they realize they're alike in more ways than one. and of course, both girls being useless gays. keep your eyes open for the small details i don't mean my typos and run on sentences

author notes: i tried to make this update a little lengthy because i'm not sure how much i'll be able to write this upcoming week (i'm nearing finals). my taglist is still open for those of you all who want to be added in, just comment or drop an ask in my inbox! lastly, feedback, comments, reblogs, questions, literally anything but hateful speech is welcome and very much appreciated!

̟ ̇ ˖ಎ˚˖࿔ masterlist 𓂅୨⊹ ₊˚๑

you flopped onto your bed and let out an relieved exhale that your day had finally come to a close. with a comeback only days away, you and your members had been finishing work around 2 AM just to get back up around 5 AM. however, for the next three days, work days were finishing early so that you didn’t look tired when the showcase and other activities began. you opened your text messages for the first time since this afternoon, just to see your friends blowing up your notifications.

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚✭・彡♡・✫.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

you set your phone aside and opened your laptop to log into the streaming service website that was connected to your Veil app. it took a few tries before you correctly put in your password and found Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. you checked the time again and saw it change to 9:00 PM. not even a second late, your laptop chimed and you saw the video call icon lighting up indicating that your match was calling you. the excitement you had was replaced with anxiety as your finger hovered over the answer button. not wishing to miss the call you answered and immediately your camera turned off and the voice filter was activated.

there was a beat of absolute silence on both ends of the call until you both burst into laughter at the awkwardness. despite the voice filter and the girl’s blurred camera, you could see her silhouette double over before flipping her long hair over her shoulder when she sat back up once her laughter subsided. she was the first to speak, the smile evident in her voice, “hi jasmine.” you shyly replied, “hi lyra.” silence fell over the two of you once again before you blurted out, “i’m sorry this is so fucking weird!” the girl nodded in agreement and said, “this reminds me of like high school on the zoom calls when you had to ask a teacher a question after class, y’know?”

you let out another laugh and added on, “wait did you ever fall asleep during class on accident or something and you woke up and it was just you and the teacher?” yunjin snorted and said, “not me but one of my friends did and i knew because we would text each other during the class. so when the class ended i kept asking questions to the teacher so i had a reason to stay on the zoom call. but i was also calling my friend’s phone at the same time.” you admitted between laughs, “you’re better than me because i would have left the call so quickly.” the girl laughed even harder then said slowly, clearly distracted by typing on her laptop, “let me just log into the streaming service-”

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚✭・彡♡・✫.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

yunjin hummed to herself as she made her way through the different movie titles that were on her watchlist until she found the one she needed. you both went to press play and just then someone else entered her room and loudly whined, “unnie!!!! i need help with my math homework.” yunjin motioned to her laptop that was very clearly on with you on the other side of the video call as a polite, “now’s not a good time” reminder. eunchae pouted and explained, “i know you’re on a date right now but i don’t know how to do this and it’s due tomorrow. also everyone else told me to ask you since you got into university.” yunjin felt her breath hitch when the maknae said ‘date’ but she tried to brush it off, hoping that if she pretended she didn’t hear it then maybe you didn’t either you totally did.

eunchae held up the worksheet that she was assigned which had three unanswered math problems on it. yunjin pushed her glasses further up her nose and skimmed them over, not recognizing what any of the instructions were asking. she sighed and said, “i haven’t taken a math class in like 5 years.” eunchae stared back at the paper and tried to make the instructions sound easy, “i only need help on the last one. all you have to do is find an equation of the line tangent to the graph of f at x equals 1.” yunjin looked over the last math problem then said simply, “um…the limit does not exist.” you failed to hold in your laugh at the movie quote while eunchae was far less amused, “unnie, you can’t just quote that lindsay lohan movie at me and expect me to accept that.” yunjin was genuinely stuck because she didn’t remember a damn thing from her calculus class she took in junior year of high school. the american brought her hands to her head and raked her hands through her long black hair, “well i- i don’t know.” eunchae pleaded desperately, “unnie please, anything you remember.”

you watched the entire conversation unfold before you and honestly you could feel for both parties. when you were in high school, your family was no help when it came to the assignments that troubled you. even now minji came to you for homework help and sometimes you didn’t know the answers when she really needed them. finally you decided to just see if they’d let you help, “hey i know this might be out of place but i might be able to help.” both girls responded in unison almost immediately, “yes please.” there was a smile on your face as you instructed, “yeah sure just send me a picture of the problem. when you looked over the function you felt a slight burst of excitement at the realization that you knew exactly how to solve the solution.

you grabbed the journal and pen off of your nightstand and spoke as you began working through the problem, “looking at the function, you’ll note that f(1) equals (7/4)e which means the tangent line passed through the point x equals 1 and y equals (7/4)e. also you’ll see that f isn’t raised to a variable power which means the ordinary rules of differentiation do apply. and because this problems is so algebraically complicated, you’re gonna want to apply the natural logarithm first so that differentiation will be easier. now apply the natural logarithm to both sides of the equation and use the algebraic properties of logarithms then tell me what you get.”

on the other end of the call, eunchae was frantically writing away while yunjin peered over her shoulder trying to understand what you were talking about. the younger girl read off her answers and you approved, “right. so now differentiate both sides of this equation, and note that both sides need the chain rule.” once again you waited for eunchae to read her answer and when she did you praised, “perfect so now i want you to differentiate it and read me the answer again.” this time when she read the answer you paused, “mmm look at the last part of the equation one more time. watch the signs.” a smile spread across your face when you heard the younger girl correct herself, “oh it’s plus 2 over 3-x.”

you hummed in agreement and said, “okay now multiply both sides of this equation by f(x). eunchae murmured aloud as she wrote more down and you prompted once more, “now the slope of the line tangent to the graph of f at x equals 1 is?” eunchae read her answer off, and asked, “(7/4)e (53/7- ln5) .so does that mean the equation of the line tangent to that is y-(7/4)e= (7/4)e (53/7- ln5)(x-1) ?” you beamed, “yeah that it! good job, that was a really complicated one honestly.” the younger girl tried to give you credit which you quickly told her, “i might have helped but you did all the hard work on your own.” yunjin stared at the smile eunchae had on her face, one that she hadn’t seen all night because of this exact homework assignment.

the younger member hugged yunjin for the night and exclaimed, “unnie, your date is so cool!” yunjin blushed at the comment and you felt a small raise in your heart rate at this being the second time you’d been referenced as the girl’s date. before yunjin could try to play it off, eunchae leaned over her member and waved to the camera, “thank you unnie! Byeeee!” you laughed and said, “bye bye.” eunchae skipped out of yunjin’s room with her journal tucked under her arm before closing the door behind herself.

yunjin apologized, “i’m sorry about that i didn’t think she was gonna come in my room.” you laughed and waved it off, “it’s no big deal really, my little sister does the same thing to me.” yunjin asked curiously, “you have a little sister?” you hummed in confirmation, “yeah she’s 19 right now.” yunjin gasped in genuine surprise, “no way- me too! that’s so crazy.” you agreed and then she asked, “wait- how are you so good at math?” honestly you didn’t know how to answer her so you just shrugged, “i don’t know i’ve always been better at science and math instead of history and languages i guess? like with math and science everything has an explained answer for the most part, and finding the answer is pretty standard. so nothing is really up to individual interpretation, it just is what it is and it’s pretty much the same for everyone.” yunjin leaned on her fist and teased you, “how poetic.” you sucked your teeth and rolled your eyes, “oh hush.”

although you knew time was slowly slipping, you wanted to bring it up while it was still relevant, “she said you got into university?” the american leaned back against her headboard and explained to you, “i didn’t think you’d catch that…but yeah i was supposed to start university in the fall after graduation. then i got a call from my company saying they wanted me to be a trainee for a girl group, and i had to come to korea immediately.” she waited for the typical reply of disapproval she got when she explained the past situation to people. it always led to her explaining far more than she wanted to about herself. however, she was surprised when you asked genuinely, “did you know what you were going to study?” yunjin laughed a bit to herself as she answered, “business.” before you could answer yunjin asked you, mostly as a way to learn more about you, “did you take the college entrance exam?” she was partially expecting you to say you didn’t bother because that’s how most idols ended up.

she was pleasantly surprised when you admitted, “i finished my second year in university before i had to drop out.” she let out a gasp and whispered, “no way- jasmine-” you laughed and rubbed the back of your neck, “yeah…i was exactly half finished. i managed to balance school and being an idol pretty well but then work picked up faster than i thought it would so school went on the back burner."

yunjin was even more intrigued so she asked, “what did you study?” you answered simply, “gerontology and neuroscience.” there was a beat of silence before yunjin whispered, “what is germontology?” her cheeks grew pink when you laughed a bit before telling her, “gerontology. and it’s basically studying old people problems and neuroscience is brain science. i planned to study parkinson’s or alzheimer's disease.” you paused and realized the weight of the topic so you jokingly added on, “and now i get paid to wear high school uniforms and bark for fans.” yunjin snorted and tilted her head back as she laughed at your unexpected comment.

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚✭・彡♡・✫.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

yunjin and you managed to get through the first movie without problems and most of the second one. however, right as there were thirty minutes left you started to fall asleep and yunjin could tell clear as day. you fought to keep your eyes open as you watched the scene play out on your laptop but yawning every few seconds made things all the more difficult. the american asked you quietly, “jas, are you falling asleep on me?” you refused and sleepily insisted, “no, ’m awake.” only for you to begin dozing off a minute later, soft soft snores falling past your lips as your breaths grew deeper and slowed down. she made a mental note of the timestamp so she could rewatch the part with you another time. yunjin knew that you had been working hard on top of it being well after 1 AM so she didn’t mind at all. the fist that you weren’t leaning on was wrapped around your other wrist with your grip slowly loosening as you slept. suddenly, your hand fell onto your keyboard and you accidentally turned your camera on. yunjin’s breath caught in her chest as she stared at her screen, paying no mind to the ending scene of the movie. she panicked and frantically ended the call with her hand over her mouth, holding back a shout since all of her members were also asleep. she sat and stared straight ahead before letting out a breath,

“oh my god-”

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚✭・彡♡・✫.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

bonus: tweets from yunjin and y/n +their moots (ft eunchae and her friends)

♡‧₊˚˘͈ᵕ˘͈‎ 彡♡ ༘*.ﾟ .·:¨༺ ʚ♡ɞ༻¨*:·.﹢࿐ ☆

taglist: @https-f4iryjin @awkwardtoafault @seungspolaroid

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verilly · 8 months ago

Text

REL:LY / Magic Words / LSG ✶

Aqua Hoshino x Reader

This is PART THREE, check out other parts in the link below!

REQUIEM: Sixth New Genesis!

What's to come: [Reader likes both genders], [Aqua x Reader], [Akane x Reader]

[Songs of the chapter: "MANNEQUIN" by Deco*27, "Parasol Cider" by Nanahoshi Orchestra, "Nonsense Bungaku" by Eve]

[7,531 words]

It's been a few days since the video was posted. Multiple news websites were talking about it, people online were harassing others about it, even people in real life were talking about it. Even though Akane doesn't want to be the face of the news so soon, it's shining a better light on her. She is a victim of the internet and she'll never have that innocence back, but she's a lot better now.

Akane has been showing up on set more often now, you cling onto her like there's no tomorrow when she stays. Honestly, when she first came back, you swear you could feel your eyes watering, but that isn't important. What is: is that Aqua gave Akane an important suggestion. "Try acting, be someone who you aren't to protect yourself. Separate this show from your real self." It really wasn't something you agreed with, but if it would keep Akane happy and safe, you'd be okay with it.

"It's really all your choice, Akane." You perked up, leaning against Akane's shoulder glaring at Aqua, "Don't think about the audience when you make this decision. I know they're important or whatever, but you are too!"

"I think it's a pretty good idea and I am good at acting, but... what— who should I act as?" Akane asked, tilting her head to the side you were opposite to. Aqua stared out, not giving her a response. "Ahem. [name], what do you think?" Akane shifted her head to face you as you stopped leaning on her shoulder, before you could respond, Akane kept going. "What's your type?"

Your face turned red as your eyes widened under your mask. All eyes were on you, including the people filming. You choke on your words before letting them slip, "M-My ty-t... type..?" You bit your lip, did you even have a type? The only person you've ever fallen for was... Hanae. You caught yourself before you accidentally said her name. Roaming around your mind, you realized how similar Akane and Hanae really were. What differences did they even really have? Hanae was more conservative and less obsessive, then again, people had more of a life outside social media, didn't they? You shake your head after another minute of pondering, "This isn't helpful at all but... *I think you being yourself in all of your 'Akane-ness' is my type."

"You're lying..." Akane blushed, jolting her head to look at the floor, "How could you say that? Even after all I've put you through..— Hm! N-Nevermind..!" Akane took a deep breath in and put her arm around your shoulder, "A-Aqua! What about you? You did save me too after all, I think I can do this for you. As a thanks." You stared at Aqua, is Akane just going to ignore your super-extra-cute confession? You pout under your mask and lean closer into her. Aqua better have a good answer. "So... What's your type, Aqua?"

"Hm..? You're really serious with that question?" Aqua looked a little shocked, he sighed and looked out the window, "I never really thought of that, I guess." He rested his cheek to the palm of his hand and started thinking. "My type... I guess my type is someone who's pretty."

"Go to hell!" You mutter half jokingly.

"Keep going Aqua!" Akane said, pulling out her notepad and pen. Staring at him with her pretty blue eyes.

"Someone who can smile as bright as the sun, and performs without a fault. Assertive behavior and speech... Captivating eyes that can draw you in with one glance..."

"You're telling me you've never thought of your type before? Hah, what a stupid lie." You half-heartedly joke as you shake your head back and forth, "Come to think of it, a pretty girl who works hard... kind of sounds like Ai from B-Komachi, doesn't it?" Aqua's eyes widened for a split second before calming down quickly, his lips forming words, but you couldn't hear it at all.

"Ai? I've heard of her... I'll research her the best I can: I'll be your girl, Aqua!" Akane said with glee, writing down the name in her notepad while putting it back down on the table next to her. She turned back to you and smiled, "And what you said [name]... I.. Mm, thank you."

You leaned onto her shoulder as Aqua stared at the two of you. His eyes were dark. Did no one else notice that at all?

˚⋆୨ ✶ ୧⋆˚

You were back on set today, another week passed by without any progress on finding Hanae. You were inside a classroom, the sun was bright, Aqua sat directly next to you. Couldn't he have found another chair? You'd been sitting next to him the entire school week, your head plopped down into your arms as time passed by slower than usual.

Aqua didn't say anything when he sat next to you, the camera's were on, glaring onto your face. Still, you didn't feel the urge to act or put on a show. This was just life, for you at least.

...

When's Akane getting here?

Just as you thought that, footsteps could be heard from behind the doorway. You got excited, getting back up and impatiently staring in anticipation for Akane to enter.

It was just Mem and Yuki. Ah, well that's fine. Maybe you should go hang out with them? Before you could get up from your seat, the two girls had already come over. Not to you specifically, but towards your general direction. Their real target was Aqua.

"How's it going, Aqu-tan?" Memcho slyly asks, sitting on the desk in front of him, "I overheard that... you have a type??!"

"Yah, and I heard it was pretty basic too! All you care about is looks, am I right? All boys are the same! It's about time you morph into a man!" Yuki says, bursting out laughing after.

"Who told you that?" Aqua asks, deadpanned, he doesn't seem mad or concerned.

"How silly of you, Aqu-tan! I said we overheard!" Mem laughed, you forgot you told her about the 'conversation' you and Akane had with him. "I also heard that Akane was acting for you? That's so totally weird! Why would you do that to that poor girl?"

"Yeah Aqua! You totally suck! All you care about is looks!!" Yuki adds in, you nod your head to their conversation... When is Akane going to come back?

Begrudgingly you continue to watch everything unfold before you as you lean on your arm. All you could think about was Akane.

...When did the two of you get so close?

That's when the door slid open again: It was Akane!

The door was wide open, she didn't enter though. She patiently waited for the cameras to pan to her. Akane I bailed deeply before closing her eyes, when her eyes opened back up she was a completely different person. Her 'aura' changed.

She reminded you exactly of Ai.

You guessed that Aqua noticed too because he was just as shocked as you were, maybe even more. Akane's eyes were different, they looked just like Ai's too— no, they looked just like yours. Just a different color. Was this seriously all just acting? How could someone just change their entire vibe like that?

"What's wrong you all?" Akane asked, looking at everyone present, "It's almost like you've seen a ghost!"

"A-Akane? Is that really you?" Yuki asks, understandably a bit taken back, "You seem so... different...?"

"Do you dislike this part of me, Yuki?" Akane asked, tilting her head to the left. Yuki shook her head while she waddled back towards the two boys who just walked in. "So, how about we hang out all on our own today, Aqua?"

You felt a pang of sadness when Akane said that. Why Aqua? Why not you? You don't blame her though, Aqua is quite handsome, isn't he?

You shove your head back into your arms as the room fell silent. Aqua and Akane left the room together with a group of camera people following them. Was all your hard work for nothing? Did Akane not like you? Did she really like Aqua more than you? Aqua is just so... off putting. But she's never been under his stares for days on end has she?

Aqua totally likes her now, doesn't he?

Why does that make you a little sad?

˚⋆୨ ✶ ୧⋆˚

For the next few days of shooting, Aqua was all over Akane. Though, you weren't out of it the entire time. You and Akane still had moments together, and it was really enjoyable. It felt really familiar, but you couldn't really put your finger on it.

Then it came to the last day on set. Everyone knew that the last episode was all about the cast members confessing to each other. You didn't plan on doing anything, there was an uneven amount so it was bound to happen, a fail on the casting director honestly, but you aren't going to complain. You'd rather not have manic fans asking about your love life while streaming, and if you were going to confess to anyone: It'd be Akane, and she's currently preoccupied with Aqua.

The sky turned dark and the sun started to set, you sat down on a bench as the crew started to gather around. The contestants lined themselves up and discreetly discussed with each other on who picks who. It's usually the boys going for the ladies, isn't it? You could guess who would go with who.

"Alright, is everyone set?" The director asks, casting a glance towards the people working with the lights and cameras.

"Yes sir!" The higher up yelled back.

"Action!"

The air seemed tense, somehow. No one was up to the challenge of going first. You kept to yourself, watching through your mask. Was it figurative or real because it was getting a little harder to breathe as each minute went past.

Noboyuki bit the bullet and went over to Yuki. He got on his knee and poured out his feelings to her, it was honestly kind of cute. She said no though. You didn't actually understand it at all, Yuki said she liked him, so why'd she reject him?

Then it was Kenji, who knew he'd go next— not like there were a lot of options, but still. He went up to Memcho of all people, didn't expect that either. They were so different, so it was kind of a shock to no one when Mem rejected him.

Lastly, it was Aqua's turn. He was standing between you and Akane, his eyes glanced towards you for a split second before he slowly walked towards Akane. She was sitting underneath a tree on one of the other benches, his hand traveled up to her face and brushed a lock of her blue hair out of the way.

Their faces drew closer and closer together, lips barely an inch apart.

Aqua's eyes shut and Akane brought her hand up.

Right before their lips connected, Akane brought a hand up between the two of them.

"I'm sorry, Aqua. I just can't do... that." Her eyes didn't have stars in them, "We can still be boy-girl friends, my heart just... it's for someone else."

She quickly got up from her seat. Everyone seemed shocked, you and Aqua were no exception. What was she up to? Akane excused herself and bowed as an apology to Aqua, and also probably the camera, and marched towards you.

"[name]! Will you accept my confession of love?" Akane shouted out, her face was red and her hands were on her thighs.

"H-Huh? What?? Why me?- I mean I would love to and everything but I seriously don't uhm!!" You stutter, your face turned red. Everything was a blur in that moment, you don't really remember too well as to what happened but, Akane slipped your mask away and kissed you underneath it. Her eyes were shut with passion while your eyes were wide open, stars gleaming. You didn't stop it, a kiss takes two people after all.

You were definitely flustered, your eyes wandered to the people in the crowd watching the two of you. Aqua looked shocked, his mouth was wide open, a real sight to behold. The rest of the crew looked almost exactly as surprised as Aqua, was it really that bad?

Or in other words: Would it give this season of Lovenow higher ratings than the rest?

-End of Re_Love:Love_You

Lovenow was a hit with everyone, there weren't as many controversies surrounding you and Akane that you thought they'd be. Which is a good thing, but mildly strange. The two of you decided to make your relationship private, mostly for your sake, not stating whether the two of you were dating or not. On the inside though, Akane decided to stick to just being friends— Just kidding! The two of you are full on dating!

Just kissing again... it was more of a situationship.

On the other hand, a few days after Lovenow ended, it was released to the public that Akane and Aqua were dating! Which made you... jealous. Though honestly you couldn't really place why.

To your dismay, they didn't air the episode of you and Akane sharing a kiss. Instead, they begged Akane and Aqua to re-record the part and act like they were in love. The two agreed reluctantly while you threw a tantrum in your head.

...

Fuck.

You bite your lip as you throw your head onto your pillow, why was Akane so important to you? Not that it matters right now, you have a party to get to. What would look good on you?

It was the Lovenow after-celebration, not something you've ever been to before. You asked Aqua about it since he had one for a past drama he was in, apparently this one is supposed to be less fancy. Just a casual hangout with the cast, an unofficial party! How cute!

You tossed something on and went to meet your friends at the barbeque place you went to last time. It was the same old, same old, even the seating. You were squished in between both Akane and Aqua, even though the two of them were dating. It was awkward to say the least.

"So I heard that Akane and Aqua were dating!" Memcho stated, poking at the freshly cooked meat in front of her, "What made you change your mind, Akane? I thought that you and [alias] really had something special!"

"Huh? Oh! We do! We do, just for [alias]'s sake. They told me that their fans would freak out or something... and that it was for my safety? I don't really understand it all, but if [alias] wants it then I thought I'd do that."

"Oh I see... then what about you Aqua? What did you think?" Memcho asked, turning to look at him.

"I think that it's fine, me and Akane only started dating because so many people were betting on it on social media."

"Ah, so you're no fun. I see." Mem sighed, collecting some bell peppers from the plate in between her and Yuki, "Then what about you, [alias]?"

"...Akane can choose for herself, that's what I think." You were deadpan with your answer, you didn't want to come off as rude though. Is it too late for that? "☆Oh! But seriously, it's all for Akane's safety that we don't get together. As an internet celebrity, I expected you to understand." You said jokingly.

"Ahh! I do! I do! I'm professional in every aspect- not that I'd expect you to understand either! I am your senior after all, aha!" Memcho defensively shouted, laughing with you.

Kenji and *the other guy entered the room with a few more drinks, this hangout session was a lot less fun than the one you all had last time, for you at least. How could you change that though?

The night was coming to an end, everyone said their goodbyes and you tried your best to cling onto Akane as best as you could. She didn't seem any distant than she was in the beginning, but it still felt as if there was a barrier between the two of you. This is Aqua's fault. You groaned as thoughts wandered in and out of your head, you were surrounded by the two blonde's. You never knew Mem lived in your direction.

The walk was really peaceful, you didn't expect that much from Mem. However, the person to break the peace was Aqua.

"Memcho, what's your dream?" Aqua asked, his head poked out from your side to look at the girl beside you.

"My dream? My dream is to be somewhere, be someone. It was really fun being on stage with all you real celebrities. It was almost like being on a stage." Memcho sighed, she twirled her finger in her blonde locks. "I saw how you reacted when Akane acted like Ai, she really captivated you huh? I really miss that about her..."

"You know about B-Komachi?" Aqua asked

"How could people not know about B-Komachi?" You laugh as you put your arms on the back of your head, "Especially after the tragedy, it's a lesson well learned. Ai didn't deserve that at all, she was going to make it to the top of the world."

"Exactly, right? After that I couldn't believe what horrendous thoughts I had! Even after what happened and what was yet to come, I still wanted to become an idol." Mem looked at the ground before rising up with a smile, "That's all behind me now, I believe in myself, and I'm sure that I'm someone's idol— at least, I'm sure there are hundreds of people looking up to me."

"The two of you really like B-Komachi?" Aqua asked, putting a hand to his chin, "What about you [alias]? Have you ever thought about being an idol?"

"An idol?" You thought about your second life, you weren't even an idol yet. And in this life, you already had a plan set for yourself. You didn't need to go down that path, but you never were an idol before.. What are you even on about? "Oh? I guess I have, but who hasn't in this day and age?"

"Then what would you think about joining the second coming of B-Komachi? Strawberry Productions is trying out the whole idol thing again." Aqua said, putting on a soft smile. It looked weird. "We're friends, aren't we? I think that I know you two well enough to trust that you'll be great idols and won't tarnish the name of Ai." He's acting so strange.

"What?! Oh em gee! It would be an honor!!" Mem agreed happily, "Though, I would need to speak with someone who actually knows what they're doing, make sure it isn't too shady."

"Yeah, if the contract is okay I'll think about it."

"Right, you've been to my home before. Just follow me."

˚⋆୨ ✶ ୧⋆˚

You've been in Aqua's home before, but never this up close. You got to see his mother and sister again, they're really cute. Another thing to add was that his 'house' is a lot larger than yours. What was the word for it? It was a studio apartment while yours was a small crummy apartment your mom left you when she moved back to her home country. You really never realized how big it was.

"Ah, so you've brought another one for me. You're really good at this whole recruiting thing, aren't you?" The pink haired woman grumbled, "How'd you manage to snag this one? A YouTuber and full-time influencer?" She shifted her gaze to look at you, "And a faceless internet celebrity and singer. I'm surprised that either of you were interested in becoming idols."

"It was a dream of mine ever since I was a child, ma'am." A drop of sweat rolled off of Mem's face as she spoke to the director.

"Well the two of you are independent streamers so there aren't any managers I need to talk to?"

"I am independent in it of itself, but I do have a team working for me in the background surrounding legal advice and finances, so I believe that I would have to check in with them before I make any hasty decisions." You say, gripping at your lower forearm, you really didn't want to experience another death so soon. You haven't met Hanae yet... and everything regarding the industry is much more safe, isn't it? So no falling lights.

"Once you get a concrete answer, there won't be any problem regarding Internet personalities, we at Strawberry Productions work with them on a daily basis, but you Memcho. You look like you have something to say."

Memcho was lying about her age. By 7 whole years. You tried your best to suppress a few giggles to slip out from your mouth, but then she poured her heart out about what inspired her, made her keep pushing, and what blocked her from getting any farther. At that point, you felt bad for almost laughing.

"So by the time I was financially stable, I was already over the prime age from any idol to debut..." Mem sighed as she looked down at the ground, fiddling with her fingers. Before anyone else could and then Aqua's sister barged into the room.

"No one is too old to be an idol!" She shouted, jumping on top of Mem with a hug, "Every age is idol age, that's what Ai would say!! Are you really going to join me in B-Komachi?!!" She looked over to you and smiled as bright as the sun, "And you! The one that Aqua totally def-likes-because-why-else-would-he-invite-someone-as-cool-as-you to our house, are you going to join us too!?"

"I'm thinking about it, but I'm sure that you'd all do well without me!" You say, ignoring the parts that she said too quickly for you to understand.

"But you're just so talented!! You can sing so well and you'd be such an amazing addition to B-Komachi!" She shouted out, "Oh! My name is Ruby Hoshino, please remember my name even though you are so ultra-amazingly-famous-celebrity!"

"Th-Thank you, ☆I'm sure you'll be a great idol...!" You feel awkward saying that, did you even really mean it? Probably.

They talked more about it for a few minutes, but it came to an end. You texted your team about joining B-Komachi and they texted back in a meer seconds, it would affect your stream schedule greatly, but you'd still be able to live off of it for a while. You had enough money to sustain yourself and maybe one more person for at least a few years. It was really all up to you, did you want to try to become an idol again?

That was all you could think about, you tried to get sleep but the scene of getting crushed played over and over again. You even searched for any new articles about it, but not a lot showed up. At least, not on the internet. It was over 40 years ago, wasn't it?

God you sound old.

It's a lot safer now, so you wouldn't die from being an idol. With another bonus of being a part of the famed B-Komachi! That would most definitely get Hanae's attention, wouldn't it? It'd help you find her— or maybe Hanae will find you? You'd have to tell Aqua tomorrow at school. Yes.

Anything for Hanae.

˚⋆୨ ✶ ୧⋆˚

The sun rises and so do you, thinking about being an idol made you feel tense all of a sudden. Ruby goes to the same school as you, so it shouldn't be hard to tell her you accept her invitation, right? You could always just ask Aqua. You continue on with your daily routine as you shrug, your uniform looks as plain as it did the day before. Maybe you should add something on to it?

Eruru calls you over and Matsuyo over to her table and yaps on and on about how her weekend was. Being a loved daughter of an amusement park owner would be fun, wouldn't it? She shoves you and Matsuyo in her arms and suggests that you three should go out for fun, you agree with her. Matsuyo hisses at her touch, but doesn't move further.

"Ohh! Let's all take a photo together, it would look really cute for my Instagram!" Eruru says, pulling out her candy colored phone, "Say 'Cheese'!~♡' or how about 'Happy Third Month of School!!' That looks so so cyuute!~ Ah you guys are the best!"

"How does she have this much energy...?" Matsuyo grumbles, taking out his own phone, "But going to the park with the two of you doesn't sound that bad."

"It sounds amazing!☆ We could go on so many of those roller coasters until we vomit our guts out together!⭑" You say clinging onto his back, shaking him back and forth. You felt embarrassed, but he didn't flinch.

"Not you too" He complains, "But that sounds good too, maybe not the vomiting."

"Alright!! What about this Saturday? Or Sunday?" Eruru chimes in, "I posted it and it already has a few likes! We are totally going to be super duper famous!"

"Saturday is fine, we have to study on Sunday though. We have a test, remember?"

"Arghh!! No tests! Those are so boring." She whines.

Aqua walks into the classroom and sees you leaning on Matsuyo, he seems a little disappointed. You brush it off and roughhouse with your newly made friends. Though he was back at it again, staring at you from a distance. It didn't creep you out as much as it did before you officially got to know.

˚⋆୨ ✶ ୧⋆

"Aqua, take me to your sister."

He couldn't take your nerves sometimes, yet he found himself agreeing anyway, as you now walked next to him, hands on your hips. The way to the courtyard felt neither fast-paced or slow, you didn't say anything as you two made it to the destination of where Ruby Hoshino sat.

Neither of you noticed the red haired girl lurking close by.

When Ruby's magenta eyes spotted the two of you, she perked up expectantly.It was as if gears turned in her head until her face lit up and she proudly exclaimed "Oh, Aqua! Are you showing me your first friend?"

Aqua only looked at her with a deadpan expression, but you felt the need to squint your eyes together, the female twins' energy being way too bright. It was somehow higher than Eruru.

"Your sister is too bright, can you tell her that for me?",you stood behind Aqua, only daring to look at the personified sun over his shoulder. He ignored your comment though and gave a court 'No' to his sister, who immediately had the gears turning in her head, again until...

"Ah! Is she your girlfriend?"

Your jaw dropped to the floor. There was a shocked aura coming from one of the bushes nearby, as well as the sound of someone falling back a little, yet nobody bothered to notice. As your eyes went wide, Ruby continued on a rant, completely unbothered though, as she made fun of her brother.

"I can't believe you tried to get with that Akane girl, because like-"

"She is not", Aqua cut his sister off. He put his hand on the small of your back and you tried to not react, but you couldn't tell, was your face heating up? He pushed you forward towards Ruby and then pulled his hand away. "This is [alias]."

...

"Oh!" Ruby really needed to work on her volume control.

The aura coming from the bush changed, you couldn't tell if it was in a positive way or not, but the redhead used it as a hiding spot to claw at her hat.

Eyes blessed with one starry glow gazed into the ones holding two and the blonde girl stepped forward grabbing and holding your hands together. The serious look on her face surprised you, there were so many emotions in her eyes, like a deep galaxy and suddenly you saw an energy in Ruby that you've only ever seen in an idol long passed.

"So you've decided?", there was hope in her voice.

The close proximity was still startling you, as well as her suddenly turning serious, but you quickly tried to gather yourself. Small flashbacks of the long lost time where you've spoken similar words flood your mind, hands unconsciously gripping hers a bit tighter.

"Yeah, I've made up my mind. I'll take up your offer, I'll join B-Komachi as an idol."

-End of Magic Words

Even before you joined B-Komachi, you knew that training to be an idol would be hard work. However, you didn't expect it to be this hard. Maybe it's a lot more different in this body than your old one. You aren't an energetic 12 year old anymore. Was all this cardio really worth it?

You stop to catch your breath with your hand on the stone wall next to you. 'Why did I accept her offer' kept running in and out of your brain as your face turned red with adrenalin. Pieyon shouted for you to keep going as you were way behind the other three girls. Biting your tongue, you made it on top of the hill before flopping to the floor in front of Kana and Ruby. All this running puts way too much pressure on your little deformed rotten heart.

"Are you okay, [name- [alias]?" Ruby asked, putting a hand out for you to grab.

"Ruby! Why are you saying that? You're the one with asthma!!" Kana sighed, helping Ruby lift you back up from the ground. Ruby comments with a 'But I'm not the one dying!' as you stare at the sky above.

"Keep it up, [alias]! It's only been 30 minutes-ish!" Memcho laughed, patting your back and handing you a sticker covered water bottle. "Well actually it's closer to 25, but y'know~"

"What do you mean it's only been 30 minutes??!" You whine, pulling your mask off to the side of your head to breathe in fresh air for the first time. "I feel like I'm dying!! There's no fucking way I'm going to be able to do this on a stage.."

"Language!" Ruby shouted, "No idol would ever drop an f-bomb without getting criticized, we really need to work on that." She took a sip from her water bottle, it was glittery and pink. An Ai charm was attached to the lid. "And put your mask back on!!"

You groaned as you slapped the mask back on your face. *You had to go to the amusement park later with your friends... would they even let you go? You weren't even that good at dancing either. Idol work just isn't meant for you. You fall butt first onto the floor as you shut your eyes. B-Komachi II is already going downhill. Speaking of downhill, that was your next goal. Running downhill back to the studio with your new friends and Pieyon. Again, you were behind them, but it wasn't as bad as the run up.

When the apartment was reached, you felt the cool breeze of sweet air conditioning on your skin. You sat down on one of the brightly colored sofas Strawberry Studios owned.

"No sitting down just yet! We have to work on our muscles! And also learn choreography, some marketing stuff using videos, probably some more cardio, oh wait, not to mention editing the videos–" Ruby continued to go on for a few more minutes as you caught your breath, again.

The dancing sucked, especially learning it all from a not so high quality video. There wasn't anyone to train you besides Pieyon and the Ai fanatic: Ruby. She was a lot better than you were, so was Kana. Memcho was also better than you, but the gap between the two of you was a lot smaller than your gap with the two self proclaimed idols.

You wonder where Aqua is.

As hours went by, your training for day one was finished. You were with the girls, sitting in a room with walls made of mirrors as they packed up their stuff and made some small talk with each other.

"Here's what's funny: we did this whole work out thing with Pieyon to promote B-Komachi! It was sooo hard, we had to do, like, actual punches and stuff for a whole hour!" Ruby burst out laughing, but quickly stopped to think, "I just don't understand kids these days, why do they find buff guys working out so entertaining? Whatever, we'll have to make them fall in love with us!~"

"If they're all going to fall for us, then we're going to have to make a name for ourselves as idols. For example: Who's going to be the face of the new B-Komachi?!" Memcho says, putting her pointer finger to her lip.

"So a leader?" Kana asked, shifting her eyes to look at Mem.

"Yeah! A leader! I say that I should be the leader because I'm the one with the most experience using social media and with uh– nevermind that part. That's totally [alias]."

"No thanks, I'm not up for being the face of this whole group thing, I can't be the face. I don't even have one." You joke, "But I'm being serious, I don't think it would do us any good by having me be the leader. Plus, I don't think I'm really... marketable."

"I totally understand that." Ruby says, putting a hand on your shoulder and smiling, "We won't pressure you any further– but since we're on this topic... I nominate myself to be the leader of B-Komachi because I resemble Ai the most. Plus, I was the reason we made this whole group in the first place, y'know? So I think that the title should go to me."

"Well you aren't going down without a fight!" Memcho shouts, pouncing towards Ruby. They got in a cat fight as you look over to Kana.

"What about you? You haven't said anything yet. Any thoughts on who the leader should be?"

"Hm? Oh well... no comment." Kana sighs, "This is dumb, why don't we just get a random number generator online and just like... I don't know. Ruby is even and Memcho is odds, and whatever number gets chosen the person gets the win?"

"No Kana! That's a horrible idea!" Ruby shouts, "Being an idol is all about talent! Memcho, I challenge you to a singing contest in the karaoke bar down the street! Whoever gets the better score gets to becomes leader!"

"Oho, child? You dare challenge me? Respect your elders, Rubytan!" Mem laughs, you can't tell if it's at her self deprecating joke or at Ruby for challenging her. Mem pointed her finger at Ruby with a silly looking grin plastered across her lips.

"Yeah? You wanna go? Let's go!! C'mon!" Ruby runs out the door with Mem closely behind her.

"What about you Kana, are you gonna go with them?" You ask.

"No, probably not. I'm going to head home now. It's getting dark anyway. Bye [alias]." Kana left before you could say bye to her. From a distance you could hear her saying bye to Pieyon as well.

You're alone in the room as you sit in a corner and scroll through the apps on your phone. It's always the same thing again and again, art of you, food, videos of babies, art of the newest anime, true crime, the latest controversies, paparazzi photos of Akane, and school stuff on your separate account. It's all so much, maybe you should post something soon...

*Shit.

You run down stairs quickly only to find Pieyon taking his mask off. A pretty blonde head of hair popped out of the mask as he set it down. It was Aqua under there the whole time!

Oh.

Oh???

"Oh. Hi [name]." Aqua said, his face was sweaty and gross. That's what a mask does to someone, doesn't it? "I forgot you were still here."

"Eww!! I hate that, put your mask back on." You whine, covering Aqua's face with your hand from a distance, "I can't believe you did that stupid voice! You're such a loser!!" You laugh, "And I can't believe that you were the one to make me run all of that stupid shit!!!" You groan, flicking his forehead.

"You said you wanted to become an idol, this is how you do it." Aqua says softly, looking over at you. His hand was over his forehead. "Can I take your mask off?"

"Well if it's you then it's whatever." You sigh, his hand slipped your mask off carefully, grazing his fingers– barely touching your actual face before setting it down onto the table before you. You flinch at his touch and make a face before reverting back to your normal self. "I don't think I like this whole idol thing right now."

"Really? Why?"

"I want to say that I'm loving this whole setup, but I like it when group activities are like... how do I say this, I wish that I could be friends with all of them. And I know that the time will come, but as of now it just feels really uncomfortable. Like Ruby is obsessed with me for some reason, Kana just doesn't seem to like me that much, and Mem is– well actually nothing is wrong with Mem, she's cool."

"That's a lot." Aqua sighs, "Do you want me to talk to them about it or something?"

"No. That'll make me sound like a loser. Instead, I'll just... I'll just chill out or something, I'm sure that it'll be fine. Idol work is hard work, so I'll push through like the rest of them☆"

"Make sure that you take breaks though, you know it isn't going to be good for you if you don't." Aqua says, he puts his hand on your right arm in a gentle way. You backup a little with a smile across your lips.

"And how would you know that? ☆It's not like my heart's going to explode or something." You take your arm back from him as you say, giving him a look.

"Do you really know that?" Aqua asks, "It doesn't have a high chance of happening, but I'm sure someone like you with a genetic heart defect would take precautions, no?"

"..." You were taken aback that he remembered something so invaluable in everyday life about you, but you were grateful to some extent that he did, "What does it mean to you anyway? You aren't some sort of doctor or something! You're just a kid you like idols– and it's not like you're gonna give me a break from any exercises!!"

"True, maybe I'll need to train your heart more than the others, yeah? You and Ruby."

"That is so... stupid!! Aqua you aren't going to make me do anything."

"But that's how you can be a good idol, don't you want to make your fans happy?" He said menacingly, it's almost as if he was trying to test you.

"I already make my fans happy! In fact, just because I joined this group means that I can't stream or– or make any content for them all to consume!! [alias] is falling off right now!"

"Chill out, it's only been like one day." Aqua murmurs.

"One day is a lot!! But like... I guess it's fine. I can still try to make music and they'll eat it up..."

"I'm sure Matsuyo would be upset. He's a real big [alias] fan." He states sarcastically.

"And you aren't? Your sister seems to like me a lot!" You reply sarcastically to his comment as you cross your arms.

"I'm more of a [name] fan."

"..." Your face turned red as you bit your lip to not say anything else that he could counter and make you even more flustered- embarrassed. Yeah, embarrassed.

"...Weren't you supposed to go to the amusement park with Eruru today?"

"Oh shit! I totally forgot!! Okay, yeah. Thanks Aqua!!" You yell, running off to meet your friends. So that's why you came down here, you can't believe that you forgot about it so quickly. The time is 7:39 you're already 19 minutes late. You mentally beat yourself up as you call an uber your way to ride over to Wonderland, Eruru's place. You hurriedly type up a text to both Matsuyo and Eruru filled with apologies and lies on what you were doing before this.

You cover your face with your hands in the car ride as you think about what just happened. Did Aqua really need to say that? Did he even mean it or was he just trying to get high ground? Or was he just trying to catch your off guard? His words kept repeating in your head. That's it: you'll never let your guard drop around him. Hopefully.

˚⋆୨ ✶ ୧⋆˚

On Sunday, you and the girls met back at the studio. The silence was somewhat awkward. Kana was on her phone, trying her best to not think of anything related to B-Komachi it seems, Ruby and Memcho were looking back and forth at each other, whispering in each others ears every now and then while giggling, and you were staring at all three of them with an awkward smile plastered across your face. At some point, you started staring out at space.

Thankfully it wasn't for long because Ruby quickly broke the silence with Memcho at her side. "Okay! We decided who the leader should be." She smiled while Mem gave her the thumbs up. "It's going to be..."

"Kana Arima!" Mem and Ruby both shout out, pointing their fingers at the surprised girl. Her jaw was dropped, and so was the phone she was previously holding.

"WHAT??" Kana shouted, "There is NO way I'm going to be a leader for this... rookie group! It would make me look bad! And it's not like I'm like Mem and [alias], they all have a backup plan! I'm just some... erm... I don't have an agency or- or a fanbase that I could crawl back to if this whole plan falls backwards! This is just totally not going to work out in my favor! There's no way! Nononono, everythingisgoingtofailandand... What happened to you wanting to be the leader, Ruby?!"

"Well while we were out at karaoke, we saw some songs that had your name in it!" Ruby said, pointing to a picture on her phone.

"And then we searched it up on YouTube! And we saw such cute videos of your singing songs and some of them were actually pretty recent. Kana, you have such a great voice! So much better than me and Ruby!" Memcho says, clicking on one of the videos on Ruby's phone. The song started playing and before it got to a part where you could get a good listen to Kana's voice, Kana jumped and slapped the phone off of Ruby's hand.

"No! D-Don't listen to crap like that!!!" Kana screamed, "I- I thought I told you guys that I didn't want to be the leader!! Didn't I?"

"You did? I don't remember you saying anything like that~~"

"Noo!! I can't be the leader, I know nothing about being an idol! I never even liked idols to begin with, I think they're all phony and fake for keeping up an act all the time!"

"Hey! Don't disrespect other idols, we could get canceled for that you know! And you put on acts all the time, you're an actor. That's your job!" Ruby shouted back, picking up her phone from the floor and dusting it off.

"If it means anything, I think you're the most experienced out of all of us, Kana." You say, putting your hand on Kana's shoulder, "And I know this is all unexpected, but we all believe in you. You can do this!☆ You've been on a stage before, we haven't! If anyone, I think that it should go to you. We're all learning how to be idols after all." Kana looks at you with a smile as she takes a deep breath.

"And if you mess up, we'll be right behind you to pick you back up!" Ruby said, her left eye shined brightly, it almost outshined you!

"That's so totally right!" Mem agreed, nodding her head back and forth, "You'll be a terrific leader, and if anyone disagrees they'll have to answer to my fists!"

"I... I guess I could try being a leader. If I'm good enough, I'll be able to push the spotlight on you guys. Th-Thanks." Kana's smile drops as she closes her eyes. She said something that only you could hear, "If I'm good enough, or... if I'm the best leader then he'll be cheering for me. I'll be a bright star that he can look up to."

Kana likes someone? You didn't expect that, but you internally agree with her. Even if you do hate most things about being an idol, you wouldn't let B-Komachi crumble down. Hanae wouldn't like that, so neither would you.

-End of Looking So Gentle

Check out the other parts here! {CLICK ME}

#aqua x reader #aquamarine hoshino x reader #aqua x you #aqua x y/n #oshi no ko x reader #onk x reader #oshi no ko #aquamarine hoshino #akane kurokawa #aqua hoshino #akane kurokawa x reader #akane x reader #verilly

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featureenvyproductions · 5 months ago

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my thoughts on how to do Basically Kinda cel animation but cheap as fuck PART 2

If you haven't seen part 1 of this you can find it here:

INTRO

Ok so where were we. We had gotten through penciling last time. This part won't be super ultra mega as involved because we won't be like. You know. Building a shitty light box.

We will however be doing 🎉ink and paint🎉

I probably made you buy some of the things you need in the previous part of the tutorial but let's go over all the ingredients you need for this part. Once again the whole point of these is not to have you make the most super duper high quality thing to ever exist that will make god herself cry at the marvel wrought by your skilled hand the point is to Traditional Animate TM if you're fucking broke as shit and get your shit out there no matter what because you're stubborn and you can do this and no one is gonna keep you down. Like in part 1, I bought EVERY SINGLE ITEM in this list at the dollar store, ensuring pretty much maximum affordability (you likely will not have to go back for extras later so these will mostly be one time purchases unless you're trying to animate a bazillion fucking frames). You may even have most of this laying around your house.

You will need

-sharpie (don't worry! They have eliminated the horrible smell from when we were young! There's still a bit of smell but it's not as bad or as dangerous especially if you leave the windows open) get at least black or a dark color but you can get additional colors if you like

-clear page protectors (these come in packs of 16 and you will need 4 for every dollar store drawing pad's worth of frames if you're intending to use the whole pad. Otherwise just get as many as you need. If you need more than 8-10 packs however it becomes more cost effective to go to a big box store and buy a pack with several hundred protectors)

-gloves. You'll want to wear these while inking and painting because it'll reduce the chance you'll get a bunch of finger prints on the clear sheets, or paint on your hands. The dollar store sells nitrile gloves so I'll use those here, but typically I actually buy white cotton gloves in bulk for this.

-acrylic paint (I recommend getting at least 2-4 colors - like 2 contrasting colors and white+black. you can do a lot with a light color + darker version of the contrasting color or a dark color + white though. And you can just have ONE color only if thats what you want. It's just important to remember that you will NOT be able to dilute the paint with water if that's what you're used to doing. You also cant go wrong with just primary colors + white but my store was out of blue and yellow so :/)

-craft adhesive, specifically the dollar store kind or something like it. I'll elaborate on why later but it's really important. If you don't have a dollar tree in your area, I think the closest thing would be tacky glue? I honestly straight up do not know though. You need something paintable but ultimately MORE STICKY/TACKY than it is wet. If that makes sense

-something to mix paint on (for the sake of only getting things from the dollar store I got paper plates)....I didn't take a picture of this but I feel like you know what a paper plate is probably. You're on the depression meals enthusiast website after all

-something to put water in to mix your brush (or just use the sink I guess)

-something to dry your brush (like paper towels. I am so so serious you will need a dry ass brush)

-brushes. One of those sets with some pointy ones and some less pointy ones will work. We're not going for perfection here. Just don't get something so chonky you can't do little corners and don't get something so small painting a larger area will press your rage buttons

Ok. Onto the process.

A Note on Backgrounds

I forgot if I explicitly mentioned backgrounds in the last tutorial but if all you did was draw stationary settings on the "animation paper" for back drops then all you will need to do is go over the lines with a sharpie or even just darken them and shade with your pencil. You do not need to transfer stationary backgrounds to a cel using the process in the following section unless you really want to (it does make painting easier, but I didn't paint most of my backgrounds for my animation aside from the occasional detail. If you aren't painting detail inside outlines or animating something like say water or snow, transferring to a cel is really unnecessary). Kind of like the background below (of course, you'll note that this is a piece of paper taped to a page protector. I don't know why I didn't take a picture of literally anything else. Same idea though you just won't have to tape it to a page protector to align the image if you already drew your background on the punched paper)

Ok now onto the stuff that DOES move.

Inking

Ok! So let's in the frames you penciled when following the last tutorial. For this part, you will want your sharpie(s) and page protectors. And gloves wear the gloves.

The way this works.....In traditional animation, you would typically trace over the pencil drawings you made on the animation paper, but trace onto clear sheets that can be composited later to make one who frame of the scene. Like photoshop layers but manual.

Essentially we're going to use the page protectors as our cels and ink onto those. Typically you would use acetate cels, but the fact that no one is using them these days means there aren't a lot being made and it means that you will be shipping them from a billion miles away and they're going to cost you like 75 cents - a dollar PER CEL. Not PER FRAME. If you are animating multiple things, you're likely going to be using multiple cels per frame and it adds up so fucking fast. You also would ink onto those with something like India ink or thinned cel paint. Which are also of course expensive (these days of course people mostly do digital inking and scan their pencil drawings and trace over them onto a new layer in something like photoshop but since the focus of this info dump is the broke people equivalent of traditional animation we won't be doing that here - though you're free to like chuck this tutorial into the sun and do it anyway idc I'm not your dad).

Instead we're going to trace pencil drawings onto page protectors with a sharpie.

It's really simple.

-Take the first pencil sketch in your sequence and stick it on your peg bar (we did all this in part 1 - pencils and making the peg bar).

-Put a page protector on the peg bar as well, right on top of the pencil sketch. Mine had a bumpy side. I put the bumpy side down and inked on the smooth side. If the cel feels like it's sliding you can hold the top in place by putting a bit of tape along the top edge

-Trace the pencil lines you want to keep with the sharpie. If you got a dark one i recommend using that for most of the lines bc it'll show up better but it can look cool to combine colors as long as they're kind of dark ish (important bc this will not be as dark as traditional ink) but it's your call. Also make sure to indicate the frame number somewhere inconspicuous like the very bottom next to the peg holes. Probably a good time to mention that you absolutely need to use the same type of page protector you used to line up the peg bar holes in part 1, though if you want to re-punch holes in your page protectors and use a different brand I guess I'm not going to stop you. I also won't stop you for trying other ink, but I am going to tell you that in my lengthy journey to find something that would stay on these and not smudge, sharpie was the ONLY think that could do it (well and alcohol markers like Copics, but they are way too expensive for this tutorial and don't show up as well).

-Repeat for the next pencil in the sequence etc

When you're done with those let's move onto paint! Dry time for sharpies is pretty short.

Painting!!

Ok this part was a bit of a challenge for me to figure out because NOTHING wants to stick to these little shits. What I didn't pay in money I paid in rage I guess. But I did figure it out.

Here's what I came up with. For this part you'll need all the other supplies in the ingredients list (and no I don't plan to stop calling it that I have a really boring sense of humor and it's still funny to me after 5 times and you count your lucky blessings I haven't amused myself further by switching to Ingredience).

-once the sharpie is dry on one of your inked cels, put the cel face down and make sure it's held in place with the peg bar (you won't be tracing anything in this step obviously but it'll help keep things steady). By face down I mean the inked side should be up against your drawing surface - you'll be painting on the back of the cel (so like if you drew on the smooth side then paint on the bumpy side) (I DONT KNOW WHY I DIDNT TAKE A PICTURE OF THIS STEP. I HOPE IT MAKES SENSE)

-Mix up your first color but HOLD OFF ON PAINTING TILL YOU READ THE NEXT STEP (Also note that what you start with matters - Paint from smallest most detailed area to biggest area, allowing dry time between step along the way. Basically figure out any detail areas and paint those first)

-Add glue to the paint on your pallette. I had a world of a time figuring out how to do the paint for this because NOTHING wants to stick to page protectors. I experimented with several types of glue mix ins to see if I could get it to adhere. After trying to mix the acrylic paint with (individually) Elmer's glue equivalent, modgepodge, and a watery more instant craft adhesive, I realized none of those would work. The paint just continued to bead up on the "cel". The dollar tree liquid craft adhesive did however cause the acrylic paint to stick. I experimented with the ratio and found that typically adding glue in the amount of 25-50% of the paint volume was sufficient to get the paint to stop beading, while still not diluting it so much as to cause it to dry clear or translucent.

In the first picture below, paint + that glue on the left was by far the most successful.

-ok! Go ahead and paint! - like I said before, start with details, let them dry, then do larger areas on top. Let everything dry. You may need two coats for larger areas but yeah wait for jt to dry before deciding. (Oh yeah I fucked up one of my pegs so I wasn't putting the thing on the peg bar here, mostly also bc I had nothing to trace anyway. I did also lose my tape so I'm holding it in place with a piece of kneadable eraser. You don't have to do this you can use tape just dont get it on the part of the image you intend to have in the shot (and chances are you WILL crop some of the final image in post anyway))

Once you've done all this and all your frames are dry it's time to put it all together! And that will be the topic of part 3, which will come soon! (I will show how I did it for Fate For A King, but I also realize people may not have access to all the same things, so I'm doing a bit of experimentation to find other methods of eventually ending up with a thing you can upload to tumblr ultimately)

If you click the following link and it takes you to a complete post then yay! That means I came back and wrote it at some point. If you go there and it's still a placeholder post though don't worry! I will get to it, I just want a working link here in case anyone reblogs this in the future so they won't have to go piece together the whole trail of posts.

Part 3 link!

#Animation #Tutorial ....kinda....idk what I'm doing really I'm just giving you ideas based on what worked for me #2d animation #Cel animation #Ink and paint

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caffeinated-eccentric-polymorph · 2 months ago

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💭 Daydreaming Questions 💭

⏳How long have you been daydreaming for? What was your first scenario/paracosm? I've daydreamed for as long as i can remember. I dreamt of balls with characters i loved, i dreamt of going to magical schools (not Hogwarts, i hadn't yet discovered it), i dreamt of adventures fighting the shadows of the world and of being a lost boy. The In-Between though, dates back to the begining of me writing. In primary school, we had a personal notebook for when we were bored, and i started making my own world in it. That's the very beginning of the paracosm i still hold onto.

❓Would you rather: have your daydreams projected onto a screen attached to your head at all times or be entirely unable to daydream ever again for the rest of your life? The screen! It's not maladaptive anymore, so it wouldn't pop up anywhere anytime. Plus, it's be nice providing free movies for people i love and trust! And maybe i could use the screen like a movie director, and record it to make my own little movies! It's certainly be easier than trying to write it all down!

🪞 What para of your is most like you? Paraselves/self-inserts don't count! Probably a mix of Viaris and Lilly! I'm very artistic and jittery and flamboyant like Vi but also when I was younger I was literally a younger version of Lilly (didn't notice at the time-)

🏷️ How do you come up with names? Do they come to you or do you spend hours on websites? Sometimes they come to me, but it's quite rare! Most often I look at generators or websites until one rings right! For the main cast for example, Viaris came to me, the others i had to look.

🗺️ Do you do extensive worldbuilding for your paracosm? If so, what are some of your favorite elements? I do! I'm currently trying to sort that information and write it down actually! I coudn't really choose favorites right now though to be honest

🪽 If your paras found out you were their creator, how would they react? Viaris: Step 1: existential crisis. Step 2: dang that's cool, someone made me, so I have to be wanted! (yes he needs therapy) Nikolas: That boy would never be the same. His entire view on reality and purpose would be shattered. Lilly: Freaked out. As in, why the fuck would the equivalent of a god be so close to its creation, this feels parasocial Brue: Probably would find me a bit lame/weird for having that as a solution, but would do her best for me to feel supported Harvel: Would feel like he just got out of the cave from Plato's allegory. Would think they're taking it well, they're not, they're having an existential crisis.

🦦 If you have a self insert/paraself, how similar are they to you? Pretty similar! Braver, more reckless. And, well..; not stuck in a static human body-

🕐 Is there any time of the day where you can't/don't daydream? The morning! It can't be the first thing I do after making my coffee- however I can write about it first thing in the morning, just not daydream in itself for some reason. I think it's because I love calm chill mornings so much and even if my daydreams are chill/slice of life sometimes, I move a lot when I daydream, so it doesn't really fit the vibe X)

📜 Are your daydreams linear and structured, or do you jump all over the place? Pretty structured! The jumps are more of a "in the meantime, with X character(s)" kind of thing, but even if there's flashbacks and all it's pretty linear and organised despite me improvising the whole time

🎶 What's a song you've been daydreaming to lately, and what's your favorite moment in said daydream? I've been daydreaming to "Labour - the cacophony" by Paris Paloma. Always for revolts of opressed people, often queer (or queer coded) or feminine people (like the fae or shapeshifters) That song and the feminine rage I feel while listening make me shiver everytime, it's such a powerful song

🐣 Do your paras age with you, or are their ages static? They age with me! And we have a whole history together, we grew up together pretty much! When I include fictionnal characters that I got to know younger, they aged with me too. I don't really think about it much, but if I met them for example 3 years ago, they're aged too since then.

🚀If you had the opportunity to leave this world and live in your paracosm forever, would you? Why or why not? I'm very torn, because this world and these people have been with me for around 10 years, b ut I've found great people in this verse and I'd feel bad abandoning them… I'd rather just float in between them, since the in-between is linked to all worlds theoretically.

🏃 Do you move a lot when daydreaming, and if so, in what ways? I walk (unless I'm in a moving vehicule, as the world already moves around me) and gesticulate a lot, as well as make faces and mouth things.

🎬 Have you ever wanted to make a piece of media of your paracosm (comic, animation, visual novel, novel, tv show, etc.)? I'd love for an animated series and a book series to be made!! But also I could never look at any criticism, not matter how constructive and kind, because it's too much of my baby

💫 When you actively want to start daydreaming, what is your mind's process? I'll look at fanarts and tropes and stuff I like on Tumblr or Youtube, put on some music, and usually it comes easy like this!

👻 Do you ever daydream about yourself (not a self insert, just you)? Yes, but mot in the usual way I daydream. It's more when I'm bored waiting, or even lost in my thoughts, where I'll daydream about what I'll do the next day, or when/if I get my dream cottage, what would my day be like, stuff like that. I don't move, I just sit back, and music isn't necessary for those.

🧱 When you experience a daydream block or crash, what are things you do to try and fix it (or ways you cope)? Consume series, books, movies, animatics, etc, anything that I love and inspire me! I don't usually look at prompts or tropes like usual though. And if it's still blocking, I'll try to discover a new thing I'll love, and that usually gets me out of it. Otherwise, now that it isn't maladaptive anymore, I just do other things (even if I miss my paras, they'll be there when I'm unblocked ❣️)

📖 For fictparacosms, do your daydreams affect how you perceive the media and/or the fandom? The In-Between being in between worlds, I sometimes mix it with some characters and worlds from things I like, so while it's not quite a fictparacosm, I'm still answering this ^^ Yes it does. I'll usually seperate my version and the canon one, as like, an alternate timeline yk? That's the best way I've found, as that way I can enjoy both my daydreams and the source, no matter how different or what happens!

💅 If you have tried to make your paras in character makers (picrew, meiker, etc), what is an aspect of your para that these makers never/rarely have? The colorful glowing tattoos the Bitweenians get when they get "adopted" by the in-between!! There's sometimes tattoos, but they're always in back ink TwT Still looks good, but not quite my vision

👁️ Are your daydreams clear in your mind's eye? Yes! Like a movie/series! Sometimes animated, sometimes live-action!

#cep-posts #cep-daydreams #paraportal #immersive daydreamer #immersive daydreaming

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ceps-pers · 3 months ago

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💭 Daydreaming Questions 💭

🦦 If you have a self insert/paraself, how similar are they to you? Pretty similar! Braver, more reckless. And, well..; not stuck in a static human body-

👁️ Are your daydreams clear in your mind's eye? Yes! Like a movie/series! Sometimes animated, sometimes live-action!

#kai posts #kai's ids #madd #immersive daydreaming #immersive daydreamer #maladaptive daydreaming #maladaptive daydreamer #paraportal #daydreaming spectrum #daydream spectrum #neuronarration #neuronarrator

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the-himawari-otome · 10 months ago

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Thank you for the recommendations!!! (and thank you for being so friendly!)

I've been curious about CxM and Café Enchanté so I'll definitely look into those! I know it's unexpectedly heavy but I think the café aesthetic is so cute...!

Also I have such a strong image of you liking Jean from Virche because of your twitter icon... but is Jean your favorite character from Virche? (I'm curious as to why you like him so much too considering Mathis' route haha)

Hi again! Sorry for the delayed response, I’ve been busy with Christmas plans and such haha but no problem!! Café Enchanté seems to have a mixed response, but I think it’s better if you go in expecting angst rather than being blindsided by it 😅

And LOL I’m honoured if that's my image 😂 but regarding my favourite Virche character—I consider myself a hako oshi, meaning I love all the LIs more or less equally, but for different reasons. And I’d say I love Jean as much as the main LIs. So basically, it’s just one big 7-man plateau of “I love you guys so much”

As for why I like Jean… I will put the rest under the cut because of huge spoilers + length haha

God, how do I even articulate this HAHA well, to start off, his design is my absolute fave 😂 I remember even before the game released, I was on the website looking at the characters and lamenting that Jean wasn’t an LI because he was EXACTLY my type 🙈 so when I first met him in the game, I was already in love with him… and then it went crazy from there LOL to be clear, Mathis' route is my favourite in the game, so the whole Claude family in general and their story mean a lot to me.

But overall, I think Jean's actually a surprisingly deep and nuanced character. To me, he’s the embodiment of despair and how it can go way too far in the most twisted direction. When you think about it, his character parallels Ankou’s in a way in that he also lost the one he loved in a tragic way, but his despair takes him in a totally different and more destructive direction. And the farther he went down that path, the more it was too late for him to ever turn back.

Jean loves so deeply that he’d do anything for the one he loves. But this deep devotion becomes warped in his despair and as a result, he willingly becomes a villain for her.

But this is where the interesting part comes in. Because through his relationship with Mathis, you can see glimpses of how conflicted he actually feels inside. He treats Mathis like that, and continuously berates and taunts him. But at the same time, it becomes clear that Mathis actually means so much to him.

Mathis’ salvation ending really solidified my love for Jean because of how much it reveals about him and their whole relationship. I wouldn’t say it necessarily redeems him, but it re-contextualizes all of his actions up until that point. Notwithstanding the fact Mathis was created from the embryonic cells of Jean and Rosalie’s unborn child, if Mathis wasn’t important to Jean, then why would he purposely give him his unborn son’s name? Why would Jean use those cells to purposely create a homunculus that looked like him?

Jean always wanted to consider Mathis his son—and he probably did subconsciously—but he couldn’t allow himself to acknowledge it because again, it was way too late for him to go back.

And in that same vein, Jean was also extremely jealous of Mathis for being able to be with the one he loves. To Jean, everything about this situation was unfair. Mathis was supposed to be his tool, so why was Mathis the one who was happy while he was the one who sacrificed everything for nothing? His life was so sad and tragic, and he didn't know how to deal with it.

But after Mathis talks sense into Jean, and once everything becomes clear to him, the best he could do at that point was to push Mathis away so he could continue to live his own life with the person he loves. That's the ultimate sacrifice for Jean considering that's all HE ever wanted--and he's passing that life onto Mathis. Afterwards, Jean even admits to Rosalie that he didn’t do a good job at raising him, but at least Mathis still turned out a better man than him.

I could actually go on, but that would delve into FD territory haha there's so much great Jean content in the FD. Mathis’ salvation after end actually focuses a lot on him and Jean’s relationship, and the lasting effect Jean has had on him.

So yeah, in conclusion, I think he's a complex character, his story is super interesting and plays well into the themes of love and despair, and he's also super attractive 🤷😂

#ask #/accidentally writes a jean character analysis essay #seriously though EXTREME SPOILERS!!

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sunsburns · 10 months ago

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the search for glory

pairing: luke castellan x ares!daughter reader

summary: you're stubborn and relentless; he's calm and taunting. two opposites put aside their differences after years to meet in the middle to understand what glory truly means, and in the meantime, they start to question why drifted apart in the first place.

—or: desperate, you ask luke to help you learn how to fight with a sword so that you can be the best, he sees it as a way to spend time with you.

word count: 6.9k (i need help)

warnings: luke castellan, violence, long reading time, rivals to lovers, teenage angst, tooth-rotting fluff, angst, clairsse and annabeth being done with reader, percy and grover being the best duo, i used the fuck outta a thesaurus website, percy being head over heels for annabeth, kinda angsty ending... sorry not sorry!!

explicit warnings: allusions to sex, mentions of sex, kissing, kissing and more yearning!!!

a/n: luke castellan has been plaguing my mind. i need that evil man in my BONES!! INSTANTLY. charlie bushnell as ruined me like i need to remind myself who the enemy is like i'm tryyyinggg :( anyways this is a fic i wrote based on this request! i clearly got ahead of myself and once i started i couldn't stop. enjoyyy :)

You hate swords.

They were too long and heavy, an extra weight for you to carry on your body that only slowed you down. Your preferred knives, daggers you can throw with perfect precision, blades you can tuck in your boots and hide anywhere on yourself.

For years your ego had you refuse to ever touch a sword. You knew your weakness, and there was no need for anyone else to know.

"Again."

The rain pours nails against the trees. It's cold and seeping through your clothes, yet you are still outside, circling the head of the cabin and eldest son of Hermes in Camp Half-Blood. In the summer, there are storms so strong that pass by that not even the Mist can deflect. Luke Castellan has a smug glint in his eyes, directed at you, at the sword clutched in your hands and the way you still cannot control your swing. He's been trying to teach you the art of swordsmanship for days now, a necessity, he claims.

You only agreed because you thought you could've mastered it easily, much like everything else you've ever done in your life. You wanted to spite Luke and be the best, even where he thrives. But you were too rash, too much in a hurry to end things.

"Again." He repeats.

"No," you say.

"No?"

He almost laughs at you.

He's doing it to wound your pride, you know it. For years, Luke Castellan has been an itch on your back, crawling under your skin, setting everything in its path ablaze until there was a wildfire in the pit of your stomach.

"A daughter of Ares can't wield a sword?" He teases.

You take honour to your father's name. It makes you feel worthy of something, a strength that fuels your ambitions. Luke knows this; he had been there when you got claimed after a month of moping like a kicked puppy in the Hermes cabin. He'd seen the way it gave you purpose. He told you he had seen it coming from miles away--from the moment you first met eyes.

"You have the battle of fire in your soul," he said to you after the ceremony, and you never knew if he meant it endearingly or to mock you. You remember glancing at him, and the warm light of the lantern sitting on the dockside between you flickered before the flame cracked to life again. The moon hung low when he continued, "Now you need to find your glory."

And then Luke reached over to push you into the lake. You had grabbed onto the collar of his shirt, bringing him down with you. Luke spluttered when he emerged, shoulder-deep in the lake as he stared at you, hair dripping into his eyes, and oh, he was mad.

But that was years ago when you were kids.

But even then, you would have done anything for Ares. The loyalty you harbour for your father was one of the things Luke held against you. He hated it. You never knew why. You didn't care enough to ask him.

The blades of the daggers gifted to you by or father, Ares, burn against your skin, tucked away by your waistband as you tremble in the cold rain. Your fingers twitch, eager to grab and launch them in Luke's direction when he stands tall and repeats himself one more time.

"Again."

You leap at him. A shout rips from your throat as your feet stomp against the muddied ground, splashing over puddles while raising your arms to swing your sword at him.

Luke saw your attack coming from miles away. He swats you, kicking your stomach. It sends you to a tree trunk, your sword falling out of your hands. You were panting and shaking from the cold or anger or both. You slowly get back up on your feet, jaw clenched and knuckles white.

"Again."

"Fuck you!" You explode, walking angrily towards him. You've had enough of him and stood your ground. It's been hours. You missed dinner, and you were hungry and tired and sick of his shit. Once you're close enough, you shove Luke with all your might, and he stumbles into the mud.

It almost makes you smile when he looks up at you, his face twisting into something between shock and a tinge of annoyance.

"What's the point in all this, huh? Make me catch a fucking fever? Hypothermia?"

"You don't know how to use a sword," He says simply.

It spurs you further. "So what? I don't need a stupid sword to beat you."

He stays quiet for a beat, then two. The rain continues to fall as he looks up at you again, squinting as water falls into his eyes, dripping from his dark hair. "I know," Luke says. "You gotta do something about that anger, though. Restrain it."

You take a step back, watching him closely as he pushes himself back on his feet. "You said you wanted to learn." He tells you and picks up the sword you've discarded by the tree. Luke hands it back to you, shoving it into your hands. "So, I will teach you and you will learn."

The blade is heavy in your hands.

"Maybe after this, you'll be the second-best swordsman in camp."

Your eyes snap to him. "Second?"

He smirks, amused, "You didn't think you'd be better than me, did you?"

When you don't answer, his smile widens. Luke holds his sword up, nodding at you to step closer. "C'mon. Let's go again."

Lightning strikes as the metal of the swords clash against each other again. And again. There are grunts of effort coming from you, of exhaustion, and a great fury to see that Luke's barely broken a sweat, that he's enjoying every second spent with you under the rain.

With a gaze as sharp as your blade, you were fueled by the inexplicable thirst for excellence in swordsmanship; you know it was out of your expertise. Luke Castellan was the first person you turned to, despite your best efforts. And you're not surprised when he agreed, and he was shocked, yes, but he agreed nonetheless.

You only chose him because you knew he wouldn't go easy on you and that maybe, once you lash out at him enough times, stubborn, testing his patience, he would give up and leave you be.

But it's been weeks, and he's still here.

The clash of blades between you two isn't just about skill anymore; it's pride, it's a puzzle of the invisible line between the two of you, testing the boundaries, toeing at them.

And you still can't help but imagine the look on his face once you finally beat him. So you swing harder, move faster.

Luke has trouble catching you off guard or forcing you on the defensive side or even finding an opening to sweep your feet. But you were getting frustrated again, every time the two of you met in the middle, every time your shoes stepped into another puddle, every time he blocked your hits, or if the wind blew too strong. He finds your gaze when it happens, catching the way your lips twist into a deeper frown and the way your brows furrowed, how your jaw clenched and unclenched, huffing as you pick up your pace again.

In your haste to beat him, your restraint evaporates, leaving your movements once again sloppy and uncalculated. It isn't hard for Luke to knock the sword out of your hand, sending it flying backward. But you don't stop, you only grab his by the blade and throw it aside as well.

Before Luke knows it, your fist collides with his cheek. He blinks as his body registers the pain, wiping the warm wetness dripping down his nose. The rain washes the blood from his hands quickly.

His eyes trail up your tense form to settle on your face, then your eyes. His fingers flex in restraint against engaging in close combat with you. He knows he can't win this one. So he waits for the explosion that will come. And it does.

It comes in a blur of vengeful fists, kicks and grunts.

In a flash, he jumps back to avoid your hook punch, then your uppercut. He rolls to avoid your kick, but he doesn’t see your hands coming up to grab his throat and slam him back into the same tree he kicked you to.

Your hands are tight on his throat, but your rage blinds you to the knife he draws from your own waistband. In a quick motion, he slashes your forearm. You draw back your hands and release his throat at the same time.

Luke jumps out of the way. He sees the defiance in your eyes, as well as the satisfaction.

"What the fuck was that?" He sputters, tossing your dagger by your feet.

"Are you angry?" You taunt.

Finally, you think when you can see that familiar flare in his eyes once he realizes you've been meaning to rile him up. The same flare you saw when you dragged him into the lake with you. You tuck your dagger back in its place.

Luke crouches to pick up both swords again, then he throws one at you. "I showed you what restraint looks like. Lesson over." He wipes the blood from his face again, "Now, let me teach you channelled anger."

Whatever you expected, none of it prepared you for the beating you were about to receive.

The next morning, you owned bandages, bruises and healing cuts. Your foot bounces restlessly under the table as you glare at the breakfast in front of you. You have no appetite, not after last night, not after Luke had crushed every inch of your pride with every hit from the back of his sword to each time his blade would slice your skin just enough for it to leave a scar.

Clarisse was grinning, a wide knowing smile that sets your own teeth on edge when she sits next to you, your headache worsening when you catch sight of Luke slouched a few tables away.

He has a purple mark on the side of his face where you had hit him, his bottom lip split, and he has a bandage wrapped around his bicep. He doesn't look at you, eyes on his food, wincing.

It makes you feel better, knowing you had gotten a few good hits back before you threw your sword at him and stormed off.

"A little birdy told me Castellan could barely get out of bed today," Clarisse snickers. She reaches to your plate, taking a strawberry. She bites into it, humming while nudging your arm playfully.

You roll your eyes, "whatever Chris told you--"

"Annabeth, actually." Clarisse corrects you, her voice cutting through the air with a touch of authority. "She also told me she saw you two walk out of the infirmary late last night. Look, I know you guys are just sparring, but there's a line and you need to set limits and bring it down a notch. You're going to kill each other one day."

It's troubling when Clarisse, the epitome of combat resilience, steps in to address things that are becoming too violent. Her concern is a rarity, a signal that a boundary has been pushed. You do need to bring it down a notch. And you want to try. You really do. But there's this persistent itch in your bones, a phantom tug on your finger that refuses to let go.

"Whatever," you say, because you cannot find a way to explain it. You want to be the best, but Clarisse knows that. Everyone at camp wants to be the best, everyone has that craving for glory stitched into their veins with golden string. But your hunger doesn't stop there, you didn't want to be better than anyone, you wanted to be better than Luke. At everything he does.

There's an intangible presence that envelops Luke Castellan, an invisible aura that chases him through the air, and you're pulled to it with an almost magnetic pull. It's something you desire, something you want to claim as your own, willing to be consumed entirely by its intriguing draw. This unsaid yearning has been simmering in your mind from the moment he shoved you into the lake.

Last night, in the cold grip of the rain-soaked ground, whatever it is that chases him, slipped through your fingers. Your back against the wet earth, teeth chattering in the cold, you held your sword defensively, trying to fend off his strike from above. It was in that unsettling instant, as the rain mingled with the blood from a thin cut on your cheek, that you felt it—the pulse of something profound. That's your glory.

When he froze, your eyes brimming with angry tears, a sudden softening overtook Luke's face as he looked at you. For a fleeting second, you almost felt a twinge of remorse for your earlier outburst. That brief vulnerability, however, vanished as fast as it appeared. In the next heartbeat, your sword lay discarded on the ground, and the cold steel of his blade pointed at your neck.

"Honestly..." Clarisse starts, pulling you out of the memory. "The way you guys flirt is concerning. I think you just need to work out that sexual tension without killing each other." She grabs her empty plate and begins to stand. "Just don't do anything I wouldn't."

You would've laughed at her joke if you didn't burn at the insinuation of flirting. And sexual tension. With Luke fucking Castellan.

It makes you think of every time he's made you curse, scream, bleed, cry and laugh. You can't even say anything because Clarisse walks off, dumping her strawberry stems into the fire and disappears to meet Silena, probably.

Suddenly, you can feel your stomach twist into ugly shapes when you accidentally catch Luke's gaze. Of course. Just your luck. He's already looking at you when you're flustered. You bite down the inside of your cheek and start to stand, hoping Clarisse hasn't gone too far yet. Or maybe you could find Grover and see what he was up to.

The boy beats you to it, as always, already making his way towards you before you can even pick up your plate, still full of food.

"Hey," Luke says breathlessly. He looks smug as he stands in front of you. Too smug, you realize, for someone who has an equal amount of wounds as you do.

You hate it.

You hate his brown eyes, the way they catch the sun and look like honey. You hate the smattering of freckles he gets every summer, the scar on his face, the ones you know litter the rest of his skin. You hate his hair, how it falls into his eyes when he gets mad at you, how he gets too focused on you to push it back.

The way he holds the fresh ice pack between you irks you, a gesture that feels more like a taunt than sincere worry. "In case you need it," he says with a smile, and you can't help but think he's teasing, revelling in the fact that he got the upper hand last night. The unspoken message lingers—that you lost, that he's superior with a sword.

Nonetheless, a voice of reason nudges you to reconsider. Maybe just maybe, he's offering the ice pack out of genuine concern, untainted by the competitive undertones. Maybe you're reading too much into it, and his smile is merely a sign of kindness rather than a subtle mockery.

It still hurts your pride. "I don't want it."

"I didn't mean it like that," Luke says hastily, as if he can sense the turmoil of thoughts crossing your mind. "I just... I feel bad. I was too hard on you."

His words catch your attention, and you finally meet his gaze, a curt nod recognizing the rare admission of wrongdoing. It's remarkable for Luke to admit regret, and the weight of this confession lingers in the air.

"You were."

"But you can't really blame me," He adds. And, of course, he finds a way to turn it back on you. “You kinda started it."

"I know."

"So, I think we're even."

"You think?"

"You literally went ballistic."

You huff out a breath, annoyed, "I get it." And you finally take his stupid ice pack.

When he doesn't move, you look at him again, squinting at the early morning sun, "What do you want?"

He smiles again, swaying on his feet. "I'm taking a few kids hiking."

"Okay?"

"I need another counsellor to look after them. If you wanted to come with me," he suggests, the words carefully chosen.

"Why?" You raise a brow, hoping to hide your initial shock.

"Because the weather's nice," he shrugs, "And Annabeth said she found a waterfall somewhere off on the other side of the mountain and I've been meaning to check it out for a while-"

"No," you interrupt, shaking your head, "I meant why me."

Mischive sparks in his eyes, reminiscent of your earlier years at Camp Half-Blood, before you were claimed. Back in the short time when the two of you would wander away from the group, charting your own course, or setting up silly pranks for Mr. D. A particular memory resurfaces—your favourite prank involving filling bottles of wine replaced with soy sauce, left for the camp director to discover.

"For old time's sake." He says.

You're still apprehensive, "The last time we went hiking together, Chiron shunned us to the get-along-cabin."

It was three years ago, and you don't remember it as clearly as you hoped, but you can still recall teasing, poking each other with sticks, swearing and the nasty names, and racing to see who would find the young camper you lost first after spending ten minutes fighting over it.

Fortunately, you did find Apollo's young daughter, but not before rumours of a missing camper reached Chiron's ears. He had assigned you two cleaning jobs at the same time you were compelled to stay at the small cabin in the middle of the forest till you weren't neck and neck with each other.

"And that wasn't the best week of your life?"

You can't help but roll your eyes. "When are we leaving?"

Soon enough, you're busy smearing another layer of sunscreen on Grover's nose when Percy appears at your side.

Two groups of kids under thirteen had made it halfway up the trail, the sun lazy and warm, the way it could only be on a late morning hike. The kids are still quiet with sleep, trailing happily behind each other, trading secrets and sips of water with their assigned hike buddies.

It was nice. And a part of you was happy you've agreed to tag along. The smell of fresh pine needles, like forest floor and mountain air, makes you smile.

"Are you and Luke fighting?" Percy asks, twigs and leaves already poking out of his curls.

You finish patting Grover's forehead as you turn to the other boy with a soft frown, pulling out the small sticks. But the two kids stare up at you expectantly, as if waiting for some sort of answer.

"I don’t know if you've noticed, Percy, but Luke and I fight all the time."

Grover rolls his eyes as he falls back into step beside you, the three of you continuing up the path a little behind the rest of the group. But Percy tugs at your arm, clearly not finished with the conversation, nor satisfied with your answer.

"But that's the point," he says, and you huff as you pull him out of the way of a fallen branch, his attention focused too much on you to notice it in his way. "You haven’t been mean to each other all morning."

"Or called each other names," Grover pointed out from the other side of you.

"You call each other names all the time."

Annabeth Chase appears beside Percy, tucking her hat into her pocket as she sets you with a knowing look. Percy grins at the girl's arrival, cheeks pink as their shoulders brush together on the narrow path.

“So what?” you mutter.

You glance up ahead, over the crowd of children’s heads to see Luke bickering with the smaller kids, a boy from Dionysus' cabin poking him in the back with a long stick as he trudges behind them. You have to bite back a smile, but only because you had offered to lead with the younger kids, because you know they like you more than they like him, but Luke, stubbornly, refused your offer. He's an idiot.

"We're adults, we can call each other names."

Percy scoffs loudly, and all three kids stare at you, less than impressed.

“Have you and Luke ever kissed?” Grover suddenly asks, letting the words burst out from his chest like he knew he shouldn’t have asked.

You trip over a branch, the same fallen sticks that scattered the trail that you’d pulled Percy away from. You turn to look at the boy so fast that your neck protests, your eyes wide.

"Because Luke looks at you like he wants to kiss you all the time."

"Of course they've kissed," Annabeth grumbles. "Don't act all shocked," she tells you, "I watched you guys last night."

"Ew," Percy makes a face.

Annabeth wacks the back of his head, and while Percy winces, she continues, "Not like that. I noticed neither of you were at dinner. So, I went to check on you. I found them sparring."

"In the rain?" Grover's eyes widen.

"Stop stalking people, Annie," You warn, but there's no bite to your words.

"I'm being observant," she declares.

"It's definitely stalking..." Percy mutters, kicking a small rock down the trail.

She decides to ignore his remark this time and looks up at you. "I always thought it was ridiculous whatever you and Luke had against each other. I hoped you'd do something about it before you both imploded because you're too horny to come to terms with normal emotions."

Your jaw drops, a small noise of indignity and humiliation comes from you, and Grover looks mortified. Percy lets out a loud, obnoxious laugh, nearly doubling over as if Annabeth has said the funniest thing he's ever heard.

There's a faint smile on her lips when Percy puts his hand on her shoulder as his laughter dies to quiet, amused snickers. It eggs Annabeth to keep going, "I'm sure your kiss was romantic. Glad it took you guys a week of almost killing each other to realize you actually have feelings for one another."

You feel it again, that itch and wildfire that spreads in your stomach whenever Luke gets too close or says something that irks you. You find yourself fumbling with your words; no comment about how wrong she was, or how disgusted you were, or a snarky, awfully rude remark as a way to deflect. No, your voice starts to betray you. You only hope your father can't see you now as you grow flustered (this is something you will never admit).

"We never kissed."

Annabeth hums, raising one brow as she nods. She pulls her hat back out again, unfolding it as Percy drops his hand from her shoulder. When she looks at you, she has a similar smug look on her face, akin to the one that adorned Luke's face earlier that morning during breakfast.

"You know, Luke said the same thing when I asked him. But he never denied he doesn't like you, and neither did you."

With that, Annabeth puts on her hat and disappears.

You watch branches move and footprints left behind on the dirt in her wake, and you hate that Percy and Grover are smiling at each other as she leaves. They share knowing looks, speaking in a silent language only they understand and it puts you on edge.

Suddenly, you have to remind yourself that the kids are twelve. They have no idea what they're talking about.

Thankfully, Grover and Percy never bring it up again. It's as if they've forgotten about it after spotting a pegasus within the trees. Percy instantly named it Bob, and when Grover disagreed, he named it Peter.

"Seriously?"

Percy shrugs, "Spider-Man's cool."

When the group arrives, you still can't get Annabeth's words out of your head. It makes you uneasy, and you don't feel like yourself as you watch the kids gasp and gape at the sight of the hidden waterfall tucked away behind so many trees and bushes you would have thought it was sacred to Gaia. The waterfall appears to be any other cascade in a forest, but the fact that it is concealed under the Mist that protects the camp makes it so alluring.

It was peaceful but not quiet with the roar of water, droplets pattering against the rock at the bottom of the falls. All nature and life near the waterfall seemed to grow in size, and more birds called and sang—more snakes that twisted around the branches of the tall trees and frogs that softly croaked as they soaked under the cool water.

The afternoon sun sparkles over the water and the small frothy cascade of a plunge pool. Everyone starts to scatter, Demeter's children running off to climb trees, Artemis' kids rushing to chase after the few lizards and bugs tucked under wet leaves; they all find a place to be, one they all know they will thrive most in.

"Annabeth sold this place short. It's way better than she described it."

When Luke appears at your side, a conscious effort keeps you from growing stiff. There's an obvious warmth flowing from him, a subtle tug inviting you to come near him. But you resist, steadfast in denying yourself that proximity.

"Yeah. It's nice." You say, aiming to keep it short.

"Just nice? Is that all you've got?"

You shrug, crossing your arms around yourself. "It's okay." But the truth is, it's more than that. It's beautiful. Words fall short of capturing the essence of the waterfall before you, the mist delicately kissing your skin or the laughter of the kids transforming the wildfire in your chest into a warm and comforting glow.

Luke's brows furrow, tilting his head at you. "You okay?"

"I'm fine."

You're not. It has been hours since you've fought, yet you can't get it out of your head. Shit, you can barely go on with the day without someone reminding you of it; Clarisse, Annabeth and even your mind wanders back to it, how he's been so persistent in making sure you'll be able to wield a sword, a silent promise.

In all honesty, since you've started, you could barely recognize yourself, and you knew it had the potential to be disastrous, but you weren’t sure you disliked the feeling. It was just new (it really isn't) and foreign (you've known, you've just refused to accept it), and you felt like you had to go to it rather than run away from it.

When Luke utters your name, the resonance carries an unfamiliar softness and tenderness, diverging from any way you've previously heard him speak it. The rhythm prompts you to turn your head to look at him.

The sun, in its glorious descent, casts a warm glow across the water, creating a tapestry that highlights the tan of his skin earned through long days under its unforgiving rays. His hair, in a charming disarray, falls across his forehead, and within the depths of his dark eyes, a fondness surfaces.

"Something's bothering you," he observes.

It's a statement that goes beyond mere recognition; it's an acknowledgment of his innate understanding of you. His ability to see you. He wants you to know he can see right through you. That's his glory.

“And how would you know that?”

"Maybe because I spend every waking moment of the last, what, four years, in your close proximity." As for emphasis, he moved closer to you, as close as he was the other night but without the blades of swords between you.

You'd usually have countered, perhaps by tripping him or tugging on his ear to coax him to step back. But this time, you don't. You can't bring yourself to. You find yourself strangely incapacitated, torn between the impulse to push him away and the undeniable desire to punch him again.

"And don't forget that week in the cabin. Best week of our lives, right?"

It takes him some time to react, "Sorry did you just make a joke?"

“No. I’m always serious,” you don't concede, but you did suppress a smile. You turn the rest of your body, finally fully facing him. "Listen, Luke..."

He goes to say something at the same time, but he closes his mouth and looks at you. His eyes are wary of you. It was like he was expecting you to pull a knife out of thin air and attack him.

"LUKE!"

Percy Jackson's voice echoes, a thunderous announcement as he cups his hands around his mouth, sending a mighty shout from the waterfall's peak. Your eyes widen at Percy's reckless display, a mix of respect and wonder washing over you. The boy, sitting on the treacherous ledge, dares you to wonder how he managed to get up there. But knowing him, Percy Jackson finding a way to reach to the top of the waterfall makes perfect sense.

"LUUUKE! LOOK AT ME! GROVER!"

His voice carries a blend of disbelief and excitement as if Percy himself doesn't believe he's climbed to the top while he waves his arms. Luke steps away from you, moving closer to the cascading water out of concern. The other kids begin to gather, their curiosity piqued by Percy's boisterous display. Grover walks up to you, tugging at your shirt to bring you to the edge of the natural pool.

When Annabeth suddenly appears at Luke's side, you can hear him asking why Percy was up there.

"Well, he said he could flip off the waterfall. I told him he didn't have the guts. So, here we are."

"Reminds me of someone." Luke smirks, eyeing from where he stands, Grover grinning between you both.

Percy lets out a loud battle cry from the top of the waterfall, smacking his fists against his chest. A responsible head of cabin would have told him to get down, or else he would be shoving pegasus shit for the rest of the week. But Annabeth is the one who drove Percy to the top of the waterfall, and whenever you and Luke were together, everything else was a second thought.

The kids collectively ignite, encouraging Percy with animated cheers, urging him to jump. Stepping back from the edge, he bursts into a sprint, the excitement evident as he hurtles off the rocks. Percy's arms flap for a heartbeat before effortlessly accomplishing two flips, resulting in a thunderous splash as he plunges into the brilliant blue waters.

A symphony of cheers erupts, the youngest kids bouncing in excitement as Percy emerges from the water, shaking his head to rid his curls of excess water, a gleeful grin stretched across his face. His eyes meet Annabeth's first, and his wild grin widens as she nods in approval, her own smile radiating with bright satisfaction.

Grover is the next one to jump in, tucking his legs to his chest before gracefully splashing into the water beside his best friend. The infectious spirit of adventure spreads like wildfire, and soon, a cascade of laughter and giggles fills the air as all the kids join in, frolicking in the embrace of the water.

At that moment, you feel an unexpected force crashing into your side. It startles you, and you instinctively shove the prying hands away. It's only upon a closer look that you realize it's Luke. He's looking at you with raised brows in a way to taunt you.

You aren't arguing, not quite, not yet. But the buzz in the air still feels fun.

His expression suddenly turns playful. Without warning, he seizes your arm, yanking you closer. Luke grins, that wide, bright kinda smile that shows off the dimples you almost forget he has. He looks boyish like this, pretty in a way that's soft and full of sun. Maybe it's because he is looking at you without the lines between his brows, the downturn of his lips, a cold glare in his eyes.

The toes of his shoes teasingly brush against yours, prompting your chin to tilt up defiantly as you lock eyes with him. You can smell the forest on him, campfire smoke and pine, leftover rain and something minty. He looks too happy, excited even.

You narrow your eyes at him, gaze lingering on the bruise you left on his cheek. "You're wrong, you know."

Luke tilts his head, intrigued, "About what?"

"What you said earlier. About being even."

"Oh?"

You hum, a subtle melody lingering in the air, your hands resting gently on Luke's arms. His attention is diverted as he holds his breath, waiting for what you'd say next as he stares at the softness of your skin in the sun and the beads on your camp necklace.

In the midst of this, a wide grin flashes across your face, a mischievous spark in your eyes. A sudden, forceful shove against Luke's chest disrupts the moment. Caught off guard, he stumbles backward, tripping over his feet and thrusts into an unexpected fall.

He hits the water with a splash, and to the rowdy sound of whoops and cheers, a wolf whistle from Percy when Luke emerges, top soaked and clinging to the ridges and dips of his muscles, tangled at his waist.

He sputters as he stares back up at you in shock, treading the water around him. "Seriously?"

You're fucking joyous, wrapped up in the way everyone is laughing, and you don't break eye contact with the boy as you bend at the waist and hold your hand out for him.

"I'm sorry," you manage to utter amid giddy giggles. It's a peculiar sensation—this feeling of not quite being yourself. For goodness' sake, you're giggling! It's as if you've been gently enveloped by something sweet and affectionate, a touch so tender that it feels as if Aphrodite herself has graced you with a kiss on the cheek.

But really, it was Luke. He takes your hand and tugs hard, pulling you straight into the water with him. You hit the water on the side and swam back to the surface with a gasp.

He stares at you with a devious grin, daring you to do something about it. You push your hair out of your face and lung at him.

You have to admit, sparing in water isn't something you have ever done, and the attempts to avoid any of the kids are getting to you. You are better at hand-to-hand, but now Luke has the absolute advantage. His longer limbs allow him to move better and to pull himself up on rocky ground when you try to push him down.

He places you in a headlock and presses your back into his chest. You quit struggling at that point, knowing it was over for you. But he doesn't let go, and you don't move when he slightly loosens his hold.

You spot Annabeth's gaze from the other side of the pool. She sits by the waterfall with Percy and Grover, adorning a knowing look as she raises her brows at you again.

Both of you are panting from the effort, his chest heaves against your back, a synchronous beat. The water adds a chilly bite to your and Luke's skin, but his breath is warm on the crook of your neck. Usually, you would have tapped out, or more commonly flipped him over. Yet, you find yourself in a trance, and you don't understand why you can't move away.

Why can't you move away?

"Gotcha."

The faint chuckle in his voice sends a shiver down your spine.

His breath stills on your neck, and you gulp. You clear your throat, and he drops his arm but doesn't step away, letting it hover around your waist. You laugh, and it sounds nervous, a soft noise of embarrassment, like a girl with a crush.

You don't know how to feel about it when you turn to face him, chests almost touching from the proximity, and so do your noses. You can feel your heart beating so loud in your ribcage that you think he can hear it too.

You can feel the sting of the cut on your arm, and it pushes you to ask, "Why'd you agree to teach me how to use a sword? Was it pity?"

It takes him time to answer, his hand brushes against your hips underwater, but he doesn't move it, and neither do you. The droplets of water on his skin sparkle under the sunlight. "No," He finally says after a moment. "Not pity."

"Why, then?" You ask, not looking away. "Wanted a good reason to beat me up without getting in trouble?"

He laughs a genuine burst of amusement from his lips that doesn't sound sarcastic for once. It's a great contrast to how he laughed the night before under the rain, where it was taunting and he was in his element, the thrill of a sword in his hands crushing his veins. Glory.

"Yeah, that's it."

You can't hide the smile growing on your face. "I knew it."

You float around each other in a few beats of silence, the chatter of children in their own worlds buzzing away. His hand caresses your shoulder like a feather, and you lean into his touch. It is familiar and comforting, and it makes you realize that you might have needed it more than you ever thought you would.

"No, uh," Luke shakes his head, and you find it endearing. He looks a little pink around the cheeks, his smile nothing short of scandalous. "I actually wanted to spend time with you. Fighting's just a bonus."

His admittion makes your mouth fall open. His teasing words are no longer a taunt, and the conversation is no longer an argument. Luke Castellan looks at you with the same fire he always had though, a challenge in his eyes that you desperately want to rise to.

"You like fighting with me?"

He smirks. "Best part of my day, honestly."

"Don't lie."

"I'm not."

"What's next?" You tease, "Pulling my hair at recess?"

"Would that do it for you?"

"No," you whisper because you don't think your voice should be any louder when he's so close. "This works just fine."

His lips are lightly touching yours, hovering as a ghost of a desired kiss. You hold your breath and close your eyes.

Ever so slowly, he tips your chin up and leans in to capture your lips in a sweet kiss. His free hand circles your waist and brings you flush against him as you curl your fingers into the front of his shirt, pulling him even closer to you. Luke gladly presses up against you, his fingers trailing from your chin and moving to curl into your hair, easily deepening the kiss.

Despite the prickling of your scars and the shallow cut in your forearm, you let yourself to the electric tingle of the kiss, the way it steals your breath and fills your chest with a million exploding fireworks.

You allow yourself a selfish moment to indulge in the way you can feel his heart pounding against your chest, the barely-there press of his thigh between your legs, the scrape of his bandages beneath your fingers.

You're both crossing the unspoken line, his breath warm against your flushed skin. What happened to your pride? Your glory?

He pulls back, meeting your eyes again and gently combing your hair back. There's a sick smile plastered on your face, and you watch his lips turn up, dimples creasing his cheeks. You have a swell in your chest, and it makes you acknowledge that even if you never beat him with a sword, that satisfaction would never come close to this.

A chorus of "eww's" comes from the kids, only the twins from Aphoridite's cabin are kind enough to coo and "aw". And you have to take a moment to catch your breath, fingers slipping from his shirt when he drops his arms.

Luke lets himself fall back, the water lapping at his shoulders, and he grins at you, the soles of his feet brushing up against your thighs, just for a second. He clears his throat and lets his hot gaze linger on you for just a moment too long before he turns to splash water at anyone close enough.

"Mind your business, you little Krakens!"

You believe you've stumbled upon something greater than glory, a thought that's never once crossed your mind before Luke Castellan emerges as the sun illuminating your darkest nights. It's a poetic dance, a celestial symphony where every note he strikes resonates with the promise of warmth and brightness.

His laughter becomes the melody that accompanies your every step, and the moments shared feel like constellations etched against the canvas of time. Luke, the sun in your dark nights, bathes you in the comforting glow of his presence.

But there is an inescapable inevitability that shadows his light—a matter of time until the searing flames envelop you. A war catches on, and in its path, Luke Castellan sets ablaze everything his touch graces. He becomes the harbinger of impending reckoning, and you will be forced to pick up a sword once again.

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mdzs-kinkmeme · 10 months ago

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What's a pinboard? Sry i don't get it.

Pinboard is a social bookmarking website that allows you to make a public collection of links. You can annotate each link with a description and with tags. It's very similar to how bookmarks work on AO3—probably because they're both based on an earlier social bookmarking site called Del.icio.us.

Even before AO3, fans liked to use social bookmarking sites to collect links to fanfics. When kink memes became a thing, they were easy to add prompts to, but hard to find prompts on—for example, if you only wanted to fill prompts about Jiang Cheng and didn't care about Wangxian or 3zun—because the prompts and fills were just a bunch of comments on a master post, not something that was easy to filter through. To help fillers find the kind of prompts they wanted to fill, industrious fans would painstakingly collect all the prompts from the master post and put annotated links to each of them in a social bookmarking site.

When AO3 was made, they clearly wanted to build that "annotate all the prompts" thing right into the prompt meme system, but they ran out of resources partway through (or something. I don't know the exact story.) Right now, when you add prompts to an AO3 prompt meme, you can stick character tags and ratings and trope tags onto your prompt, but...those tags can't be used to filter through prompts! The only tags that work as prompt filters are the fandom tags!

So unfortunately, if I want to make it easy for authors to find the kind of prompts they like, I have to use a social bookmarking site that links to the prompts and annotates the links.

That's where our Pinboard comes in.

Me and my tag wrangling team came up with our own tagging system and painstakingly tagged all the prompts in the first round of the MDZS AO3 Kink Meme. It took for freaking ever and we all kind of ran out steam after a while, which is why we only got through the 2020 prompts. But some of us have been talking about trying again this spring, and I'm really looking forward to it!

Now that you hopefully understand what our Pinboard is for (filtering through prompts that other people have submitted to the kinkmeme to fiind one that you, an author, want to fill) here is a how-to document to help you find prompts with it.

#mod speaks #ask #pinboard #mdzs kink meme

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myaekingheart · 7 years ago

Text

So, there’s just some stuff I feel like I need to get off my chest right now.

When I got up this morning, I didn’t even want to think about coming onto this hell-site. Normally my complaints are all in jest, like I laugh about how the Tumblr community can be really corrupt and unforgiving but it’s never anything serious. It’s on trend to laugh about how ridiculous the cliques on here are. But during this week, things weren’t so funny anymore.

I blame myself, mostly. I’m the one who opened my big mouth and got involved with something that was never my place to begin with. I saw a post I didn’t agree with and I said something about it, but I didn’t think it would escalate to the point that it did. Maybe you saw the back and forth, maybe you didn’t, but the gist of it is that I got in an altercation with a hardcore radical feminist over the significance of the father figure and it blew way out of control.

I’m not sorry for the things I said. I think for the most part, I was being pretty reasonable. Disagree with me if you’d like, but that’s my opinion and I‘m sticking with it. What bothered me about this wasn’t the fact that this person had apparently experienced what they consider abuse from their father, but the overarching generalizations they were making about fathers as a whole. Seeing someone denounce an entire demographic solely based on their own negative experiences really rubbed me the wrong way. I understand that if you’ve been abused by your father, or any parent or adult whatsoever, you are more than allowed to feel resent, aggravation, and even hatred towards them. You’re allowed to cry and curse and question. That’s only natural. I would feel the same way in that predicament.

The problem arises, however, when you take those negative emotions and thrust them unto other people. You cannot apply a localized incident to the perception of the whole. Child abuse is common, I understand that. But that does not mean it’s normal. That does not mean that every other person has been beaten, belittled, and backstabbed by their parent. That does not mean that every father has looked at his daughter and thought to himself “What a disappointment because you don’t have a dick.” Some do, yes, but all and that I feel was the meat of the argument. This person refused to believe that any father was capable of goodness and kindness, that no matter what these men are sexist pigs who raise their daughters to believe they are inferior, that they overemotional and worthless, “raised as servants and trophies.” I’ve met and learned from a lot of people in my life, and especially the past few months as my colleagues have bore their rawest, truest selves in personal essays and short stories workshopped in class and out of the 60-some kids whose journeys I’ve read, only a small percentage have ever spoken ill of their fathers across both genders. If anything, they have praised their fathers for working multiple jobs to support their families or for the tender reactions they’ve had to their children’s suicide attempts after one too many classmates bullied them. Perhaps in different social circles, in different cities or countries or cultures, things are different and fathers are normally abusive and treat their daughters as if they are worthless and inferior. In fact, I know of quite a few places where this is probably considered the norm. I think without the context of where, it’s hard to pinpoint what is normalized and what isn’t because the world varies so greatly from one mile to the next but that doesn’t mean any of that treatment is right or excusable. Nobody deserves to be treated like that by a parent. That, I comprehend completely.

This “discussion” could’ve been conducted in a civilized and respectful manner. We could’ve been adults about this. But we weren’t. I did my best to be respectful, to try and point out where this person was going wrong with their viewpoint because I personally find it shameful and petty and completely narrow-minded to believe that there is only one way to experience something and that however you experienced it is that one way. It shows a sincere lack of empathy and that your only concern is to further your own agenda by forcing your close-minded ideals on someone else. Like, for example, someone only likes to eat their sandwich when it’s cut in rectangles. They’ve never eaten a sandwich any other way. This is fine until you meet someone who eats their sandwiches cut in triangles. This is new and different and scary. You can either accept that people eat their sandwiches all different kinds of ways or you can completely denounce that it is even possible to eat your sandwich cut in triangles and tell anyone who believes otherwise that they are wrong and that their triangles are rectangles in disguise or something else completely ridiculous. I feel like that’s where the entire issue stemmed from, though: a refusal to believe that anything other than your own experiences are valid, and that people only ever experience things the same way you do.

This tension, I feel, rose to such a fever pitch, and this person apparently grew so frustrated with my refusal to agree that all fathers are horrible human beings, that I guess they ran out of tools in their arsenal to use against me and had to resort to personal attacks and belittling. Saying because I’m young, my prefrontal cortex hasn’t fully developed yet as if to form some sort of insult against my cognitive functioning and social capabilities. So basically as if to insinuate that my age is an excuse to peg me as less intelligent. Calling me an abuse-hating piece of shit solely because I don’t think it’s right for someone to hate a whole demographic based on a localized experience (but apparently that’s a trend these days? Like how the news reports specific incidents in which cops have hurt/shot/killed members of the black community, and suddenly every cop is a racist pig who deserves to die. Or if someone had been bitten by a dog as a kid so therefore considers every dog dangerous and wants them to be shot in the head or abused or something as if that’s going to atone for it.) Let me just repeat this: I’m not telling you to trust men, because trusting anyone without evidence of them being worthy is a stupid mistake anyways. If your father has proven that he is not worthy of your trust and respect, then by all means, don’t grant him that privilege. The trauma they have inflicted on you and anyone else whose shared your experiences is disgusting and wrong, and I don’t want to see girls raised in that narrow-minded, disgusting standard. Talk about your trauma, talk about your frustration, curse and cry and do whatever else you want to express what you feel about this, but just know that men treating their daughters like this is not normal and it’s not okay and not every father does this, so please do not try to make everyone else in the world conform to your own perception just because you have had a negative experience because not everyone shares that and to believe otherwise, or even say that that doesn’t matter, is petty and close-minded and sad.

Another contributor to the conversation even went so far as to blatantly assume I was a man because my views differed so greatly from their own, and then when I stated that I was, in fact, a woman, they went on to say that because I didn’t agree with their views, I might as well be a man. As if women are only worth advocating for and protecting if they align to a certain set of views. Denouncing my right to be a woman because I disagree is honestly so sexist and disgusting and I still can’t get it out of my head. I just cannot believe that apparently even though I’m a woman, I’m apparently viewed as scum and no better than those big, awful, misogynistic men because I don’t want what men have done to you to influence your demeanor so strongly that you spend your life stewing in hatred. I don’t think that’s any way to live, but do what you want. I have no control over how you live your life.

The thing that aggravated me more than anything, however, was the last condescending note on the last message I replied to: “It’s ok, I bring you the message of hope: your father doesn’t matter and you don’t need his approval to be happy.”

This seriously set me off. This person knows nothing of my father and to assume that he doesn’t matter solely because their experiences with their own father made them bitter and fostered a hatred for fathers as a whole is disgusting.

I don’t talk about my father a lot, and I don’t reveal a lot of information about him solely for the sake of protecting him (because I’m very protective over him) but I feel like I need to say something now. I need to let you know how far from my father deviates from his insinuation that he does not matter and that his approval is unimportant.

My father grew up his entire life wanting to be a police officer, and he fought for decades to achieve his dream. For years, he faced nothing but setbacks. He nearly lost his arm when it was crushed in a printing press. It’s a miracle he didn’t need an amputation. This happened mere weeks before his last test in the police academy, the one that would grant him a job if he passed. All of that hard work went down the drain, and he had to spend years in rehab just to get functionality of his arm back. Through that rehab, he began woodworking and had his own business where he’d work as a vendor at craft shows. Becoming a cop was a pipe dream at this point. The business was keeping us afloat just fine anyways, until the economy crashed and our business went under. He worked meaningless retail jobs just to keep us afloat, we moved every year, we even got evicted once and had to live in a hotel for a little while. He worked in a juvenile detention facility for a short time where he’d get into massive altercations with delinquent teens, one of which pulled his thumb back so far in a fight that my dad had to get surgery and go through another round of rehab. During this time, my dad was unhappy. He wasn’t pleased with where his life was going, and I think he felt like a failure because he was struggling to support his wife and child. There were times when my parents would fight and he would reach a breaking point and storm out. I resented him for a long while for this, but in retrospect I understand. I would’ve done the same. Throughout it all, though, he never made me feel as if I was incapable of doing anything or was inferior because of my gender. He rallied for me no matter what, he pushed me to work hard and kick ass and succeed in life. We’ve butted heads a lot and had our disagreements, but when I look back I respect and understand his perspective and my current self agrees with his views because I know I was naive and selfish back then and that what I thought was best for me may not have been the right path. I have seen the effects of financial turmoil, rejection, prejudice, and depression firsthand through the experiences of my father. I have caught him on the phone with my mother at rock bottom, saying he doesn’t understand why he tries anymore and saying he’d be better off dead. I remember stealing the phone from his hand and throwing it to the other side of the room, screaming crying at him how wrong he was because I knew he was worth more than he ever believed he was. When I was in middle school, after much encouragement from my mother, my dad finally decided to try becoming a police officer again. We pursued eighth grade and the police academy in parallel. After he graduated, he spent four years applying for jobs but his gray hair was an asset of discrimination. Nobody wanted to hire an old guy because he might be incapable of doing everything a twenty-something can. Finally, he was met with a department who wanted him, but his qualifications were quickly reaching their expiration. If he was going to finally do this, he would have to travel eight hours away to the state’s law enforcement headquarters, meet with the in court, and plead for an extension. This department promised to back him up. My dad made the long journey with hope that he’d finally achieve his dream. The department that wanted to hire him backed out last minute. My dad had to stand all alone in front of the higher ups and plead his case. A case which they rejected. My dad’s qualification expired and he still had not been hired. At this point, he no longer saw the point. He was prepared to give up. My mom refused to let him. They saved up all their money so he could afford to go through the police academy again and get re-certified. He graduated shortly after I graduated high school. He started applying again. Finally, someone wanted to hire him. And the best part was that it was our own county, so we wouldn’t have to move. This was a really drastic change for all of us as my dad began working 12 hour shifts on the road in a time when Black Lives Matter and hatred against the police was beginning to rapidly rise. This coupled with the fact that I was a full-time college student now, I was caught up in a boy who didn’t love me back, I was losing all my friends, and I was engaging in unhealthy eating habits all caused me to spiral. I nearly dropped out of college, which infuriated my father. He refused to let me give up, and didn't speak to me for two days when I insisted. At the time, I hated him for it but looking back from where I am now, I understand. He saw himself in me: that hopeless, angry, depressed being who didn't think they were capable enough and just wanted to take the easy way out. I took the bus to campus behind his back to beg an advisor to let me drop my classes. This advisor, who retired before I could thank him, convinced me to only drop half of my courseload. I confided in him about my fears, telling him of how I couldn't eat or sleep or focus because all I could think about was if my father was going to home that night. Of how every morning hug before he left for work might be the last. It haunted me. I couldn't stand to lose him. My dad and I have always had this very special relationship. When my mom's maternity leave ended, she went back to work and my dad raised me for the first year of my life. He always rallied for me and raised me under the notion that I was capable of anything I put my mind to. He never made me feel as if I was inferior or worthless or unloved. Everything he said and did was with the intention of encouraging me toward success, to achieve everything I could've possibly wanted. And while he achieved his own dream, things didn't get any easier. His field training officer constantly wrote shitty progress reports and poked fun at my father for his age, even if he was doing everything right. This affected his job performance so greatly that he was nearly fired because they thought he was incapable of doing the job correctly. Eventually, they came to an agreement. My father was put in the jail and trained as a corrections officer, making him dual-sworn, and would spend the year like that before being permitted to work on the road again. Despite still being in the corrections academy at the time, he was mistaken for a seasoned professional. To this day, he still works in the jail as a highly respected officer. It's not what he originally planned, but it's the hand he was dealt and he's still happy. And I could not be prouder of the man whom I call dad. Neither of us have been perfect-- we've butted heads and had our disagreements-- but in the end I understand why he's done the things he's done. He has fought against every setback thrown at him and still achieved his success and for that, he is the most resilient, inspiring human being I have ever had the honor of knowing. I seek his approval not because he is my father or even because he is a man but because I highly respect him. I want him to be proud of me. His approval is important to me because he does matter. The fact that someone who doesn't even know any of this had the audacity to tell me otherwise is why I reacted the way I did, because honestly how dare you.

I know I am incredibly lucky. I know I am privileged to have been gifted a father so strong and wonderful. He has left an immense impact on my life, my behavior, and my perception of the world that I am forever grateful for. I am highly protective of him because of all these things.

This is not to say that I expect all fathers to be so great. I know that's not true. I know there are fathers out there who are completely horrible. I have seen that firsthand, as well. My boyfriend's father has filled him with broken promises and favors a son that is not even of his own blood. My best friend's father has been less than kind to both her and her mother and brother. Yet in both of these instances, despite the awful things these men may have done, in both cases neither are filled with so much hatred so as to completely denounce their father. They still care for their dads and would never wish anything ill upon them. Even the great Audrey Hepburn, whose father abandoned her as a child and was a Nazi sympathizer, reconciled with the man and supported him financially until his death. Perhaps these are just specific cases of rare compassion, an anyone else in the world would seethe and curse and spit. I can't help but humbly admire their strength. It's not easy to look at someone whose wronged you and tell them that you forgive them, that you would never wish harm upon them, and that you still care about them. Because hatred is easy. It takes no effort to end the discussion and walk away, to scowl and badmouth. You can live your entire life like that. And everyone is guilty of it. It's something I still struggle with to this day, as I imagine every does and will continue to do until the end of their lives.

If your father, or parent or any adult for that matter, has abused you then of course by no means are you required to forgive them. You can curse and cry and be angry about it. No matter how common it may be, treating your child like shit is wrong and abnormal and no one deserves to be subjected to that. It's only human to hold resentment toward those experiences but the way I see it is that we all have a choice: we can either let it define us, let that anger and hatred consume our every waking moment, or we can learn from those experiences, prove ourselves successful and strong, and pursue happiness in spite of our tragedies. Granted, Rafiki says it much more eloquently than I do: "The past can hurt but the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it." I'm not here to tell anyone how to live their lives, but I know that letting yourself stew in hatred gets old after a while. It rots your insides and leaves you cold and lifeless and tired. I don't think that's any way to live. We have such a finite amount of time on this earth, I can't imagine wanting to waste it feeling bitter when you can break those chains and learn to embrace something brighter with the cards you've been dealt. Maybe I'm naive, but I'd like to believe that all humans are inclined to be inherently good. We are complex, imperfect creatures who make mistakes and stumble but to err is only human. Everyone fucks up but it's how we react to those situations that truly define us. It's easy to be cynical-- the world is dark and cruel place with vile, selfish people-- but there's good in it, too. At the end of the day, we need to believe in the good in spite of the bad.

Mistakes and mistreatment are like paint. They build up over time until the entire canvas is smothered in ugly splotches and dribbling onto the floor. It's always going to be there somewhere in your house, but what you decide to do with it is your choice. You can let it sit there and resent it's existence, scoffing and sneering at it as it constantly looms, completely unavoidable. Or you can pick it up, lock it in the closet, and start a new canvas. One where you decide what to paint. You can bring continue to paint the same ugly picture, or you can paint something new and decide whether to include colors from the first picture or not. Either way, the choice is yours. Leaving the first one alone is easy. It requires no effort. But after a time, certain color combinations can make you sick if you live within them too long. It's not fulfilling to look at. Why waste so much time staring at something that makes you unhappy? Even if you decide to paint something new, however, your canvas is yours and yours alone as is the same with everyone else. No one can tell you what colors to apply, or even pick up your paintbrush, but you cannot do the same for others. Not everyone will need to put the first picture in the closet, and that's okay. Sometimes other people's paintings just come out prettier the first time around. But that doesn't mean you can splatter your own snot green and vomit yellow onto someone else's canvas because you're bitter and think every first canvas is inclined to be nasty and ugly from the getgo. To believe otherwise, to see colors that are not there, is only furthering your own agenda and contributing to a bigger problem. Accept that not everyone's canvas is the same. Accept that you have the option to put yours in the closet and repaint, that you don't need to stare at something so ugly for the rest of your life and harbor resentment towards every canvas in the world. The choice is yours: you can stew in hatred or you can make the choice to grow. I'm not here to tell anyone which to pick, because that's not my choice. Only you can make that decision. I just hope that anyone facing a struggle and harboring resentment toward anyone can find that strength to not let it define them, to work towards finding their own happiness and making peace with the circumstances they've been dealt. Everyone deserves happiness, it's just whether or not we decide to pursue it in spite of the negative that dictates what path we take.

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katsukis-idiot · 2 years ago

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I keep thinking about pro-hero!Bakugo and hotel!reader. My sanity is nonexistent at this point, might as well let the brainrot take over.

Pt 1

So after the first encounter you have with him, you're absolutely ruined. No other dick is as good as Dynamight's, at least none that you've had. And he is only at your hotel for one measly night, so there's no hope of meeting up again anytime soon.

You take to stalking his socials, his official website, trying to determine when - or if - he'll be back in your neck of the woods. You even indulge in some Dynamight merchandise, stashing it away in your apartment where your roommate will (with luck) never find it.

But even with your relentless stalking efforts, missions aren't public knowledge until after the fact, so you just have to wait and see if it will ever happen again.

The two of you didn't even exchange phone numbers, so you're helpless and waiting, nearly getting fired because you keep dragging your feet at work, fantasizing about that big blonde hunk who rocked your damn world before disappearing from it.

And some kind of angel must be weaving your tapestry of fate together, because finally one month after your serendipitous encounter with Bakugo, he walks in during your shift, as suddenly and jarring as a crack of lightning on the dark sky of your life.

Following that crack is the thunderous footfalls of his signature boots as he stomps into the empty lobby. It's close to the end of your shift, so late at night that most guests are asleep or in their rooms.

When you see him it steals all the breath from your lungs and a simmering heat immediately boils in between your legs. Dick so good you're already getting prepped for him, a slick appearing to soak your panties.

Something is different this time, though - there's a certain intent in his gait, a purpose. And when his eyes lock onto you, it's plain to see that he's found his target.

It's you.

"W-Welcome," your obligatory phrase stammers out instinctively.

He slams a broad palm down onto the counter separating the two of you, and looms over you, making you take a step back. He is mad, but you haven't the slightest clue why. You're brain is so busy playing catch up with the who and how.

"The fuck is your game? Hah?" He sneers, and his tone takes you back to weeks ago, that commanding presence as powerfully intoxicating as it was then. You feel lightheaded.

"I - what?" You ask, dumbfounded.

He leans ever forward, his v-neck shirt drooping lower so you can see the delicious mounds of his pecs, and your eyes can't help but be drawn there until he growls, "You think you can just ghost me and get away with it? Me?"

Your brows draw together. "Ghost? I - we - I don't even have your number!"

Bakugo scoffs, straightening to his impressive height. "Then what do you call the fucking card I gave you? A damn coaster?"

Your stupefied brain reaches back to that night and - shit - what did you do with that business card? He had given you one, come to think of it, but... where did it go?

"I -" you feel your embarrassment bubbling up, the discomfort overriding your desire momentarily. "I didn't - I forgot. And I don't know where it... went." You admitted, biting your lip.

Bakugo's anger changes shape a bit, his head tilting down at you as he works his jaw, eyes exploring your face. It feels like he's picking you apart, and you're not sure if you want him to put you back together or chew up the pieces.

"You fucking lost it? Ha," he said, sneering. "Alright, sweet thing."

He holds out his hand, leaning forward again. You can smell him, this close, his skin singing with expensive cologne and something smoky. "Phone," he says, and with a jolt you comply, producing your phone and placing it unlocked in his palm. He takes it and you can see he's creating a contact card for himself. As he busies himself, you take the golden opportunity to soak in his presence, eyes darting around his massive form. Broad shoulders slope like mountaintops to his neck - the shirt he wears is sinful, or perhaps that's just him. It highlights how big his chest and arms are, biceps the same size as your damn head.

When he holds your phone back to you, it interrupts your reverie, and he notices, a smirk appearing on his face.

"I need a room for tonight." He says.

"I get off in an hour," you add, rushed.

Bakugo gives you a look dripping with intention, and you have to let go of the breath you didn't realize you were holding until he leans over and grabs your face in one hand, bringing you close enough for his lips to caress your ear.

"Don't keep me waiting, princess."

Oh, you're fucked.

#bakugo x reader #bakugou x reader #bakugou smut #bakugou x fem!reader #hotel!reader #viv imagines #pro hero bakugou #pro hero dynamight #hori had no business making this man so fucking fine #tw: anger

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jasmine-the-fox · 3 years ago

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President to the rescue!

So sorry for the silence on my end! I have been having problems so I needed time to take care of them (the fans in my laptop were dying so I couldn't use it to make salt fics until they were updated, also I was moving to a new home, unpacking my things and needed to buy new things to store my things) but now I am back better than ever! Oh and about the whole getting paid to write? Yeah forget I even spoke about it kay?

Now onto my salt requested on ao3 by PrinceGuti

Marinette was so happy! After so much hard work and support from her parents and Jagged she now had her very own website! With this bad boy she is going to be able to take on more commissions and get paid for all of them! Of course she had pieces that can be bought other then commissioning her and she worked hard to make a number of pieces in different sizes.

Of course there was also Lila still hurting her... The class bullying because Lila lied to them, Bustier and there principal not doing there jobs, Chloe being well Chloe and Adrien... He's stuck on the high road thing still, while yes there actions hurt her... The loyal clients she earned on her own supported her and always made her happy when they comment on what they bought from her... All the while not knowing who MDC really is.

Except from one client... The president's daughter, the girl saw one of her works on Instagram and quickly began to private message her for a commission... Since then she has become a loyal client with 30% off anything she buys, things were getting hard on her at school that she one day told her everything that was happening to her at school, going on and on about all of her pain because that day things had gone too far.

Lila had decided to lie about having designed a collection for Gabriel and claimed Mari stole her sketchbook, as a result her classmates broke into her locker and tore everything inside with no luck finding the 'stolen sketchbook' the principal called her parents to reprimand her for stealing... Until her parents ordered to see CCTV footage of where the sketchbook was stolen... To find nothing... And no one apologized for falsely accusing Mari! Her classmates didn't even pay for what they destroyed! She had to replace everything herself!

The president's daughter showed her story to her dad... And he was NOT having any more of this... He was going to stop all of this one way... Or another no matter what, so one morning he comes to Mari's school and puts the place under immediate investigation... All students and employees' must be questioned no matter what... It didn't matter if the parents refuse for there kids to be questioned it was going to happen.

The whole class believed it was Mari's fault, they claimed everything was biting her in the ass now while Lila made some new sob story lie to make her followers pity her, when it was Mari's turn she told the police everything and presented all the evidence she collected overtime... Adrien all the while accidentally confirmed everything she said making everything turn bad for many...

The school was shut down until specific people were replaced, Caline suffered for her actions by losing her license to be a teacher and blacklisted from working at a school, Damocles was being fined for money embezzlement and taking bribes from bullies to punish the victims, both were replaced quickly enough by strict people, when classes began again everyone was forced to learn about bullying and the signs of people being a bully or getting bullied.

The class who bullied Marinette suffered greatly by getting themselves and there families banned from the bakery and Mari's MDC website, forced to pay Mari back for the free clothes, free food, babysitting last minute and everything they destroyed to the last penny from there own pockets... Meaning they all were forced to get jobs because there parents weren't paying for anything.

Lila was deported to Italy to face her crimes there now that her mother knew the truth and didn't want to help her in any way possible a criminal she once called her daughter, of course Lila caused Mari to need medical treatment and destroyed some of her more expensive belongings which she needed to pay back no matter what... While Adrien was back to being homeschooled.

Gabriel was horrified by the people he let near his son and while Marinette is a good person, he refused to let Adrien be near her until he knew about bullying and learned more about the difference between a tabloid and bullying, harassment and manipulation, he had to make sure his son knew about all of this and more even though he didn't destroy anything or made Mari make him free things.

Meanwhile... Mari was backstage with Penny while Jagged was playing a song during his concert, she was on his world tour for a well deserved break after everything she was put through at school because Lila wanted the attention and be popular.

And now she was free... Because she had the help from the president's daughter.

#mlb salt #lila salt #miraculous ladybug #lila gets exposed

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boldlyvoid · 3 years ago

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Million Dollar Man | chapter two

18+

summary: Spencer's therapist recommended he branch out and meet new people who don't want to talk about his work... she didn't expect him to sign up for a Sugar Daddy website.

Content warnings: sugar daddy!spencer, age gaps (14 years), daddy kink, blow jobs, kissing, drinking mention, lowkey perv!Spencer, cum play, praise, oral (female receiving), grinding, love confessions, arrangements, Spencers anxiety, (more to add)

word count: 3.4K

a/n: updates on Wednesdays and saturdays at 2 pm est

Chapter Two | Masterlist

She sat on the subway with an anxious pit in her stomach and her purse held close to her chest. Her laptop in her bag, she didn’t want to lose it on her way to the most important meeting of her whole life.

Her story was becoming a book, she was almost done the final draft, they were making touch-ups to the cover and picking the type of paper today.

Her dreams were coming true within the next month, soon she’d have a physical copy of her book, her pre-sales were showing that she’d be on the bestseller list, and her name was finally going to be on the cover of this one.

She sighed and reached for her necklace, holding it between her fingers as she took a few deep breaths. She was doing so much better today than she was last year and it was all because of Spencer, he was the best thing to happen to her. To think she complimented his sweater vest and now he’s the only person in her life she can count on.

All she can think about is him for the rest of her journey, through 4 more stops she keeps her eyes closed as she thinks of all his little facts and his cute laugh. She smiles to herself and the anxiety slips away, she loves him and she knows that for sure, but she just doesn’t know how she loves him.

She’s never had a sibling, her best friends are all women, her previous boyfriends were all shit and her other sugar daddies were never this wonderful, and her parents are lesbians… she doesn’t know what her feelings really are for Spencer, mainly because she’s never known any other men to compare him to.

But she does know the exact moment she realized she fell for him.

He booked a hotel room in DC after a local case, asking her to meet him in there at 10 pm. She was waiting in the bathtub when he arrived, bubbles galore, her hair up and arms open, “welcome home, honey.”

He laughs, “you want me to get in there with you?”

She just nods, “let me take care of you, daddy?”

He takes off his blazer, pulls his tie off and starts to unbutton his shirt. She watches patiently as he gets undressed, and it’s not sexual to her. He’s her person, her best friend, the only human being she would ever share a moment like this with and that’s when it hits her.

She doesn’t accept it just yet.

It’s not until he’s lying on her chest, between her legs, cheek resting on her boobs as she runs a sponge over his back while he gives her a little run down on his terrible week. His co-worker almost died, his mom is stressing him out, the only good thing he has left is her and she knows that.

“And then I get to my moms facility and she’s had a really good day, she knows me and she knows all of my childhood again and she’s all right there in front of me and yet she’s so far away. I’m never going to get all the time I want with her and it’s really hard to accept.”

He shares things with her that he doesn’t even tell his therapist. Because his therapist doesn’t hold him like a child against her chest and tell him he’s okay when he get’s upset.

Y/N loves him, so she kisses his forehead, “I’m so sorry, I have 2 moms if you’d like to have one?”

“It’s okay, I would love to meet them sometime though,” he wraps his arms around her waist a little tighter under the water. “Thank you for tonight.”

“Did I mention my leg is 44 inches from hip to toe?” She asks in the middle of the silence, quoting pretty woman, knowing he hasn’t seen that far into the movie yet. “So basically we’re talking about 88 inches of therapy for the bargain price of $800 dollars a week.”

Her legs wrap around him and their naked bodies are closer than they’ve ever been and yet it’s completely platonic, “I’d spend a million dollars on you if it always meant feeling this good after.”

She runs her cheek along his wet hair as he snuggles into her neck, “mmm, I like the sound of that,” she teased. “My million dollar man.”

Her stop rolls around and she pulls herself out of her day dreams to get off the train and head to her meeting. She smiles as she walks through the station, up the stairs and onto the busy downtown streets when she gets a text with Spencers special chime. She opens it when she gets to where she’s going, safely inside and in the waiting room.

It makes her laugh in the waiting room. People look at her but she doesn’t care, he’s so special to her she feels butterflies in her stomach even when he’s not around.

“Y/N!” She hears her name being called by her editor, he’s over ecstatic as he comes running out to get her. “Come, come we have so many choices to make!” He jumps up and down as he holds her arm, like a child in a candy store.

“Andy, chill man,” she laughs at him and plays it cool, “It’s just the cover being finalized.”

“It’s our baby!” He teases back, pushing his glasses up and tugging her behind the glass doors of the office.

She’s surrounded by people and paper and huge versions of her book cover. She has a sharpie as she fixed mistakes and jots down final ideas. “And I wan’t Phil to look more human and less like data from Star Trek?”

“But Dorothy looks okay?” The artist asks, nervously and Y/N can tell.

“She looks beautiful! You really brought her justice,” she smiles, “really she looks the same in my head! It’s just Phil and I’m sure it’s tough getting a drawing to look like a robotic human, let alone human.”

“I have some ideas?” She opens up more, taking her iPad out and sliding it across the table, “I wanted to give him more of a Sophia feel? His face is silicone but his joints and everything are more like an Elon Musk crash dummy.”

“That’s perfect!” She’s shocked, “why didn’t that go in the first draft?”

“I was worried it was too much,” she’s a little older than Y/N, and yet her anxiety is that of a teenage girl. “I’m going to get working on the final, do you want some emailed versions tonight?”

“Yes please,” she smiles.

“So we’re done?” Andy asks, “we’ve made all our final calls?”

“I believe we have,” Y/N closes her laptop and takes her phone out, taking a photo of the final rough sketch of her book cover on the table to send to Spencer before he comes to pick her up. She can’t wait to see him now.

—

They’re sitting side by side in matching spa robes, he’s getting a pedicure while she gets her nails done. Leaning back in her chair with a face mask and cucumbers on her eyes, she’s never felt more relaxed in her life. And just in time too, her back was killing her from writing, her knuckles hurt and she just needed a break.

Spencer did too, he was genuinely not having a good time at work anymore, every case made him spiral and he always looked to Y/N on days like that. They met more than once a week now, she got $800 every Friday and she didn’t even really need it anymore. He was coving for so much of her bills and lively hood that her savings account was growing and growing because of him.

For the first time in her life she thought she would be okay if a man left her. As terrible as it was, as much as her moms tried to raise her differently, she fell down the daddy issues rabbit hole and she’s never going to find her way out— however, luckily for her, Spencer is down here too, and he brought a flashlight.

He understands her, more than anyone else on earth. He knows all her secrets, every crush and bad grade and snide remark she’s ever kept to herself. He didn’t judge her, he could actually listen to her issues and tell her why she had them. He gave better advice than a therapist and he was able to get information for her if he didn’t know the answer to what she was going through.

He’s absolutely everything to her and yet he’s 14 years older than her, he’s still traumatized beyond belief, he’s sad and ashamed and recovering… but he’s the best man in the whole world and she wishes he could see that. If he just looked at himself from her eyes, if he felt how she did in her soul when they were together, he’d love himself.

They’re too relaxed to drive home, and Spencer knew that would happen beforehand, bringing her a change of clothes (lingerie) and that robe me mentioned. He books a hotel above the spa and takes her to it. Arms linked as they enter the suite, she’s amazed to find more than one gift bag on the bed.

“How many gifts is this now?”

“We’re at 5 out of 24.”

She laughs as she wraps her arms around him in a thank you hug, “this is what you consider 4 gifts? Spencer there are like 8 things on the bed, let alone the massage and manicure?”

“If you think this is too much I guess you’re going to get really mad next week,” he teases as she looks up at him with a surprised look on her face.

“Spencer, I am so busy next week, I cannot be galavanting around with my sugar daddy,” she tries to act like she doesn’t want to go on an adventure with him again.

The last trip they took was the best week of her life. They went to all the historical sites in the UK that she and Spencer had talked about. Mainly old churches and castles, strange poets graves, random art and most importantly; stone henge. It was a trip of a lifetime and he took it with her.

“I watched the rest of Pretty Woman the other day,” he smiles, “and I thought I’d pull an Edward Lewis and really surprise you because you deserve it.”

“You know how the movie ends, right?” Her heart beats really fast in her chest and she wants him to love her so bad but it’s also terrifying now that she’s this close.

“He lets her choose,” he whispers.

“He rescues her,” she corrects him.

“And she rescues him right back,” he really did watch the end of the movie.

It makes her heart skip a beat as she swallows sharply, “what does this mean for us?”

“I have a whole plan, a whole sequence of events I want to stick to. I wanted to make you fall in love with me this week and ask you on your birthday, can we still do that?” He pleads with her, he’s so serious. He’s clearly put a lot of effort into this.

“Absolutely,” she smiles, “but if you’re going to make me wait that long for you to ask, you still can’t kiss me till then. No matter how much I already love you.”

“Really?” He’s so soft with her, she knows he’s not reacting to the teasing. He’s never had someone tell him they love him and then stay after.

“I would never lie to you about that, spence. I know what love means to you, I know how scared you are and I’m scared too. But I know there is no one else in the whole world I’d rather be scared with than you,” she holds him tighter and rubs her nose against his, “so what’s in the bags, daddy? Finish your surprise.”

She plays along perfectly, stepping back and hauling him towards the bed. “I got you some outfits and things for the next 2 weeks, we have a few things planned. We’re going on a flight soon, I have new luggage being delivered to your apartment this week and we’re going to see your moms for 3 days.”

“No,” she shakes her head, “there’s no way, Spencer, I haven’t seen them in 5 years, I’m going to cry.”

“I know,” he cups her jaw with his hand. “They’re really excited to see you.”

She hugs him tight, kissing his neck as she holds him. “Thank you, daddy, do you want me to put something on for you now?”

“I’m just going to take it off you, plus, what your wearing is sexy enough, he whispers back. “You’re always so beautiful, baby.”

“I thought you were saving the best for last?” She asks as she pulls back, overly eager and he can tell.

“I want to repay the favour from the other night.”

She doesn’t mean to gasp and yet she does, “please?”

He pulls on the tie of her robe, opening it enough to snake a hand behind her back and draw her in with a hand on her bare back. “Please what?”

“Please, daddy?” She looks up with her best begging eyes, perfect pout and all. “I want you to touch me, I promise I’ll be a good girl.”

He steps away from her to swipe all the bags off the bed before picking her up and laying her back against the pillows. He kisses down her body, hand on her lover back as she arches, he drags his bottom lip from her belly button to her cleavage. Nipping and sucking at the exposed skin on her chest, pulling her breasts out of the bra to suck on her nipples, she moans and it’s louder than she expected.

As she plays with his hair, he marks her, bruising small little love bites all the way down as he makes his way between her legs, “take me, please?”

He’s been dreaming of this for so long, he can’t even give you an accurate number of times his mind has drifted to the thought of how wonderful she would taste, how beautiful she’d sound…

“Tell me how badly you want me?” He asks as he spreads her legs and kisses her left thigh.

“I haven’t had sex in 10 months while waiting for you. Daddy, please you’ve owned me for so long, just take what’s yours already for gods sa- OH!”

With a broad lick, his tongue flattens against her core and it shuts her up. She gets what she wants, holding into his hair as she tosses her head back, taking it all in and enjoying it. He’s been on her mind for months, every time her vibrator was where he is now, she thought of him. he’s been the man of her dreams longer than she’s known him, and he was proving it.

“Right there, daddy,” she speaks through shallow breaths, “do you know how much I’ve thought of this?”

“You know I don’t,” the vibrations of his voice against her skin are glorious, he looks up at her through his lashes as his tongue flicks over her clit and she shakes a bit.

“Fuck,” she gasps, gripping his hair tighter, “better than I thought you’d be, fuck, too bad you— Jesus, don’t have the stash anymore…”

He stops and looks up at her, the smirk on his face glistening with her juices, “the stash?”

She nods, “I’ve thought about calling it the pussy tickler,” she teases, running her hand down his cheek and swiping her thumb across his bottom lip before bringing it up to her mouth to taste, “I want more of you.”

He kisses back up her body and she reaches for his robe the second he’s close enough. “Just grind against me? I know you’re waiting but we can still feel good together?”

He kisses the side of her mouth and she takes that as a yes, wrapping her legs around him so his hard cock is pressed right against her core as they move their hips in synchronicity with each other. His breathing is heavy as he kisses her cheek and jaw, her nails scratch down his back, he feels absolutely amazing against her.

She feels so empty, she wants him so bad she’s clenching around nothing as she squirms against his cock and wishes she was full.

“I wish I could move time,” she whispers. “Fuck, why can’t it be my birthday?”

He laughs against her, grazing his teeth over her neck and drawing another moan from her but then he stops moving his hips, “why are you so impatient?”

“Remember I said I stopped enjoying everything? Well, taking a 10 month break from sex and thinking about you every time I got off has made me desperate,” her hand cups his cheek, “I’d wait forever for you, but a girl needs to be fucked hard every once in a while.”

Only she could find a way to make something both profoundly beautiful and whorish at the same time, he loved her for it and she knew that now. He smiles and leaned in to rub his nose against hers and it takes everything in her not to kiss him. The same way it was taking everything in him not to slip into her as he began to grind against her once more.

She’s so close, the accidental edging has added a whole new level of desperation she’s never felt before. She wants to cum for him so bad, but more importantly she wants him to cum for her.

“Take my bra off,” she whispers, Spencer’s hands travel behind her back to unclasp it and he helps her out of it before tossing it to the floor.

“Cum for me daddy,” she whispers in his head with a hand in his hair, gripping him tightly as he bites at her neck, “cover me with your cum like you’re marking your territory.”

“Shit,” his hips sputter against hers.

“Say it, I know you want to,” she teases, so close to the edge but it’s too good of an opportunity. She loves seeing him fall apart like this and she can’t wait to see it again. “Who’s am I?”

“Daddy’s girl.”

He grinds down on her harder and faster and she’s so close, the bubble in her gut is reaching a fever pitch and with a gasp, she’s cumming and then she feels it. His load covers her stomach as he pants against her neck and grips her hips tighter as he comes down.

She wraps her arms around him and holds him as close as humanly possible, her breathing still heavy as he rises and falls on her chest. He’s heavy but she doesn’t care, she just kisses the top of his head and thanks him.

He brushes his nose against her neck, nuzzling her like a cat, “do you really mean it?”

“What, honey?” He remembers so much, this could be a question about something she said 2 months or 2 minutes ago and she has no clue.

“You’re not just playing along with my kinks right, you genuinely want to be mine?”

For being her million dollar man, his heart sure was broke. This is why he wasn’t ready, he still didn’t understand why she would want to stay without anything in return, he’s gotten so used to paying her for her time now that his anxiety has managed to convince him that she’ll leave when he stops being worth it to her.

“What does my necklace say?” She asks, knowing how close he was to it. “Read it to me, I forget.”

“Daddy’s girl,” he smiles again.

She soothes her hands over his back, “I would do anything with you because I love and trust you, but also because everything you do is sexy… you could read me the dictionary and I’d still want you to pump me full of cum after.”

“It sounds so crude after,” he laughs, “speaking of, we really need to have a shower.”

“I’ll wash your back if you wash mine?” She teases as he gets up.

“Only if you let me wash the front too?”

She smacks his bare ass and races him into the bathroom, turning on the water and getting in with him while still laughing and carrying on. He’s her best friend in the whole world, there’s no one else she would rather do this with… there was no one she has done this with. No one has made her feel this good, before during and after sex.

Spencer Reid was an anomaly, but he was hers.

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