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#i didn't choose it A) and B) that's not what she means
fideidefenswhore · 6 months
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Scholars have usually treated Katherine [Parr] sympathetically, partly because of Foxe’s revelations about her problems with Henry, but often they have ignored her political ambitions. In early 1543, shortly after the death of her husband, John Neville, Lord Latimer, Katherine was considering marriage to the two single men who were the closest relatives to [Prince] Edward, the king’s heir: Henry [VIII], himself, and [Thomas] Seymour. When Henry died, she quickly wed Seymour and supported his intrigues against his brother.
Wicked Women of Tudor England: Queens, Aristocrats, Commoners, by Retha M Warnicke
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c0rpsedemon · 8 months
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The Tiktokers Are Saying That Romeo And Cinderella Is About Grooming
#HELLO???? NO IT FUCKING ISN'T??????? don't f w me when it comes to romeo and cinderella i'm literally named after that shit#inb4 i also know more abt grooming than the average tiktoker bc i was Literally In The Situation They Say Happened In The Song#ie. groomed by an older teenager when i was 13-14#the entire claim is based around a. the romeo and juliet metaphor and a random ass claim about romeo's age (he doesn't have one but is.#based on context clues. two years older than her tops). and even if it was true r&j still wouldn't be abt grooming bc that would require it#writer to view the relationship as such. which shakespeare obv didn't. + it's not literally about r&j it's abt a teen girl comparing her#relationship to famous love stories and the pop cultural perception of them. b. the bit abt her parents not liking her 'romeo' when like#there are half a million reasons someone's parents could disapprove of their relationship that don't involve an age gap. also the parents#are shown to be v overbearing throughout the song so like . if anyone is mistreating her it's them. c. any of the various childlike#references. she's a teenager reaching for the adult world while still experiencing childlike naivete. this is to emphasize that. it doesn't#mean that she's secretly younger or anything. d. the school uniform line. she means that she's willing to run away at a moment's notice#without looking back home to go get her real clothes so that her parents could have the chance to stop her. it's a statement of devotion an#there's nothing to imply that romeo isn't also dressed in a school uniform. e. the you'll hate me line. a major part of the song is her#internal conflict of having to choose between her parents and romeo. her concern isn't based on the idea that if she does something wrong#romeo will hate her it's based on the fear that her indecision will hurt romeo's feelings. which is seen again in me and juliet. the#official sequel song. which is about how after they run away together she becomes overwhelmed by her internal conflict bc it didn't just go#away after she made her choice and she still loves her parents enough to question it. and finally f. the wolf line. which is about her#indecision. it's about her indecision. if romeo doesn't whisk her away quickly enough while she's leaning in that direction she feels she'l#have more time to doubt herself and it'll eat her up inside. it's a common metaphor babes and it's LITERALLY WHAT THE SEQUEL SONG IS ABOUT#romeo.txt
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third times the charm re: distilling a [winston billions autistic character] jumping off point re: like, applications of individual responsibility Bootstraps Narrative attitude just in general when it comes to some people being Made more vulnerable than others, and the way that these differences are Deserved, the solution to someone suffering for it is for them to personally choose to better themself to thusly earn more, and for, conveniently, Punishment to be a neutral conduit of moral improvement, should you be so deserving as to accept it
if someone interprets an autistic person as offputting & reacts to this with disdain b/c of an imagined correlating Undeserving Interiority within that person, that’s objective & correct, & however they punish that person is as well. autistic people should have to Do The Work of making up for their previous failure to simply Learn how to act correctly, since allistic people definitely underwent ABA & now think of themselves as choosing to act that way rather than just Naturally Being Normal (wherein also any conscious effort is just ascribed to further personal positive qualities of theirs, the Kindness / Generosity / Thoughtfulness etc etc in striking up small talk or whatever, while ascribing thoughtlessness / disrespect to nd behavior), and in the meantime a) the best an autistic person can hope for, if, like a properly humble poor person, they deserve the pity, is that equivalent of a windfall of the charity some better off individual can Choose to afford them, e.g. like if an autistic employee happens to have some manager or someone who can & does look out for them / tries to insulate them from nonsense....and at the heart of the matter, the double empathy problem Is deserved, the solution to an autistic person being disliked is either that they shouldn’t be here at all, or that if they can endure existing somewhere that’s actually beyond what they can manage to Earn, they deserve the punishment of being nobly treated “the same,” i.e., oh if Anyone was acting like this i’d be an asshole to them, which is why people don’t even need to Know someone’s autistic to react to the reality of their being autistic, the person in question doesn’t even need to know it about themself....and ultimately it’s worse to Not try to yourself punish, or allow the punishment of, this weirdo grating cringe loser, b/c only the cleansing nature of that punishment will let them personally improve & start acting better & Deserving better, otherwise you’re just enabling them to keep being annoying at other people & those other ppl’s annoyance is Also blood on your hands (then it’s time to turn around & let people even Higher Up on the social hierarchy do whatever they want / bend over backwards to interpret & explain & justify everything they do in the most positive lights & blame other people for being hurt by them) 
and like, the handy flexibility re: what’s Deserved when, say, how other characters look at a character like ben kim. he’s Too Nice, and that can mean that he deserves better, or it can mean that that’s a bleeding heart doormat loser trait that deserves the disdainful punishment it might get. and even if you Do think he deserves better? the reason he isn’t Already getting that better treatment must be due to personal failure anyways: he Is being too much of a loser &/or how he’ll only get better if he Steps Up & Acts more like a winner, for god’s sake, do the elevator dance stuff, that’s not only reasonable but obvious, cmon. tuk’s weird Confidence Training masterclass where it’s like, softhearted ben will be like “sorry :/ nothing anyone can do though” but tuk can’t go “hey, can you not be an asshole to me” and expect to get anywhere if he’s still being his too uncertain self, it’s on Him to start acting out the extrinsic behaviors of a winner and Then other people will totally start respecting him, is how this works lol....that it’s cringe for winston to Say he’s good at what he does & is valuable, b/c umm if you were Really valuable then the Natural recognition of that & corresponding positive treatment would Of Course have already manifested, and since it hasn’t, he isn’t Really deserving, and since he’s claiming to be deserving, that’s also proof he’s out of line being aggressive & arrogant like that. that it’s Also like, cringe & even crass of him to mention like, yeah i’m hoping to get paid here lol, again you’ll Of Course be paid as much as you want if you Deserve it, but if you deserve it you’ll actually mostly talk about being here and wanting to Win at it for cooler reasons, b/c ppl who are winning / more powerful than you in Whatever realm have those benefits that have just spontaneously & naturally been afforded to them b/c they deserve them more On Merit, and meritous people Are better than those beneath them and thus Will seem epic. and in the same way that ben kim seeming Too Nice can be handily interpreted as a “positive” (without truly challenging any negative assessment) or a negative, it’s like, oh winston’s Also undeserving b/c of the fact his outfit was uniquely significantly cheaper on the burn rate rundown, it’s actually Cooler to have your undershirt cost a thousand bucks, it’s costlier b/c it’s better, you buy the better clothes b/c you Deservingly have the money and thus also have the Deserving tastes to want the pricier shit. yet it’s like, cue a post of yore mentioning like analysis of agatha christie’s writing where like, oh the nouveau riche’s personal fashion & decor choices are always a bit too indulgent & overdone, vs. the refined elegant restraint of those with True Class(tm), when really any trend where Not going as ham with adornment/decoration was “better” / a signifier of properly noble Old Money was a reaction to flashier stylings Becoming more common / attainable for the less established rich / Less rich, period....the way that an identity that is defined by / requires Othering people will always have to react Against what everyone else is doing so long as that association is relevant in the cultural consciousness. ugh women do that, so it’d be too Effeminate of men, so men shouldn’t Want to do it anyways b/c they’re too inherently epic in the ways that make them better than women already, & if they Do, it’s some artificial corruption....anyways, it’s that if someone Undeserving were to indulge in pricey shit, that’d be a veneer to compensate for the insecurity of how they don’t Truly Deserve fancy shit (which wouldn’t look like deliberate flashiness anyways, of course. simply The Taste) but if they were to rather be sticking to too pedestrian / inexpensive shit, that’s Also about the insecurity of how they don’t Truly Deserve fancy shit / indication that they lack the Taste to even Know how to want better, and the best they could do is an identifiably lesser mere Imitation of what better ppl choose for themselves
meanwhile shoutout to how, of course, if winston is being treated badly on an individual interpersonal basis, that’s exactly in line with All Of This lol. he deserves it, if he deserves better He has to make the change, and in the meantime since that Bootstraps Narrative is justification for things being the way they already are, conveniently anyone else can keep getting whatever they get out of another person being so diminished as to not Deserve to be regarded as & treated as a person in the way that they do....autistic employees “making up for” their being autistic by working harder, Anyone working harder (ben kim) b/c surely that’s the only way to get a raise or promoted or not fired & if you don’t jump into the ring of like compensation negotiation & win (ben kim) then you don’t deserve the raise, conveniently....you Do have to walk away & Prove that you can do better, taylor Should Have Had To Do All This actually, even though probably mafee wouldn’t Really argue that directly, wild how whatever you say that’s a Negative about winston / sabotages any effort of his must, flexibly, be true & fine....if we thought Some People didn’t inherently deserve the increased vulnerability to harm in various manifestations, then that’d have enough reverberations that wouldn’t be contained to “maybe stop being like this to your coworker,” and in the meantime we can all just Tell that winston sucks & thus he brings it upon himself & the Rewards that people get for what they’re actually bringing upon him >>>> winston having a more tolerable time, not to mention that actually it’ll Help him in the end if, to make the punishment stop, he finally decides to deserve Better by improving himself, bootstraps time, [become nondisabled] style
oh and addendum too about like [any begrudging acknowledgment that winston perhaps Does have value tied to an especial individual talent] wherein it can be like ugh This asshole got in on a Technicality, he can crank out this coding or whatever but that’s Mechanical rather than something any of us need to attribute to an Inherently Deserving Human Interiority and like be impressed with or admire or respect or some shit like that, he’s basically cheated to get be here & so long as he isn’t forced out we can at least Use him. feel free though to be a complete asshole to him for real
#another blogger moment of just saying some shit. probably other specific examples i meant to bring up but didn't#i mean it's the Entire intrinsic / extrinsic thing lmao. operating under a premise that there Is an objective hierarchy of Intrinsic Worth#(or characters are; mostly; but if it wasn't a common irl assumption / ideology too then idk uh [encompassing gesture])#and wherein it's like. questions of ''do you actually think Anyone would deserve [xyz] treatment even if they supposedly were thee worst''#and ''do you think [xyz] should be done to people b/c the Suffering therein is supposedly good for them actually''#like regardless of anything winston does (which like...is mostly withering & coding in the corner...what) it's like#if it's so intolerable then fire him? is it actually chill for rian's dynamic w/him to be somewhere around [his bully] or [abusive friend]#like At All much less even if she's the most awesome winning sympathetic person in the world & he's some asshole who sucks at everything#and even perhaps if she's getting anything out of it. even perhaps if you also dislike winston / think he Could & Should be different....#imagine wendy brings the attempts at systematic aba for real l o l (wretched) (she also brings it organically anyways)#winston billions#and whatever all's going on here....who knows. a blogger saying some things. your guess is as good as mine#tfw ppl think ppl are just desperate to Read Into the least shit abt themselves & Self Dx As Autistic For Clout / how ohhh disabled ppl need#Special Treatment out of Sympathy/Pity / ohhh disabled ppl are actually all asking too much of us all & using Excuses....#certainly easier to Not actually fundamentally question &/or alter your understanding of the concept of disability#like no i will Not conceive of the fact that making eye contact during a convo is not a universal human behavior hinging on basic respect#to look away isn't neutral or to help someone actually listen to you better. e.g. being autistic Has to be An Excuse(tm)#adhd would be Solved by me if only they all cared as much as i do where Choosing To Remember = Remembering. excuses excuses#winston as a Totally Objectively offputting asshole doesn't deserve basic respect as a person; nor as a colleague / coworker / employee...#he definitely deserves the punishment to Specifically Not have casual acquaintanceships; friends; lovers; partners; family is saddled w/him
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novemberheart · 9 days
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{overview} John realizes his mistake, you and Simon grow closer
{warnings} cursing, some angst, fem reader, a/b/o dynamics, poly 141
Chapter 24 <- Chapter 25 -> Chapter 26
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“Pick up your bloody phone,” he growled. He paced around his office, his mind automatically jumping to the worst. Well, could you blame him with your history? “Come on sweetheart,” He pleaded on the other line. He had shown up exactly three minutes ago ready to pick you up for a lunch date off base, yet you were nowhere to be seen.
He paced back over by his desk, wondering if he should start calling in the boys to look for you. It was then he saw it. The world went silent beside his heartbeat thrumming in his ears.
“No,” he nearly whined, his chest clenching painfully. He cursed moving as fast as he could down the hallway without attracting too much attention. He was going to shred that folder and its contents. He actually found it a bit funny when he found it. He was so against you joining and now you were one of the most important aspects of his life.
He should’ve destroyed it right then and there.
He could only imagine how you felt right now. The man who you had deemed your alpha rejecting you from first glance. The man who you had shared your mind and body with. He felt sick. He ran into Kyle in the elevator. His honey eyes widened at his appearance, his hand reaching out gripping onto his shirt. “What’s happened?” He urged.
“I fucked up,” he admitted instantly. “I don't know how to fix this, Kyle,” he gasped. His own hands grabbing onto the beta.
“It’ll be alright,” Kyle soothed, his own heart pounding in his chest.
“I still had those profiles Kate had sent, the ones with omegas she thought would work with us. I was a bastard and crossed them out. Including our girl. Well, I almost crossed all of them. I left one be,” he swallowed back his nerves, his hands beginning to tremble. He had never had such a bodily reaction before. The thought of losing you too much for his nervous system to process.
“What do you mean you left one be? Like there was one you wanted?” Kyle pressed. John nodded slowly, before shaking his head- contradicting himself.
“It wasn't that I preferred her. Given her history she just seemed like the best fit if we had to pick one,” John explained. At the time it had made sense. He didn't know any of you and it wasn't like he had put that much thought into it. He wasn't ready for an omega at that time. He hadn't even sent the papers back to Kate; he just let them rot in the bottom of his file cabinet. You were also the one Laswell was pushing for. If he rejected you, maybe she would leave him alone about it. At the time it made sense.
The elevator had gone up and down a few times before they had finally gotten off. Vernie greeted them at the door, but John beelined to your room.
Your sobs were deafening. He wasn't sure if he had ever heard someone cry so hard.
And it was his fault.
He tried the handle but you had locked the door. Your sobs continued so you either didn’t hear him or you didn't care.
“Sweetheart, it's me. Let me in so I can explain,” he knuckles rapped against the door desperately. He heard you sputter something. He wasn't entirely sure he wanted to know what you said. “Please, pretty girl. I know what it looks like, but please don't put any thought into it. I crossed you out just to get back at Laswell for pushing me to choose an omega. Please open the door,” he begged. Your sobs didn't decrease in the slightest, his alpha nearly throwing him into a frenzy.
“Can I come in, love?” Kyle spoke suddenly. You gave no response other than painful-sounding sobs. Kyle winced his hand rubbing over his chest like it would soothe the sharp pain.
“I love you,” John said. “I’ll be right here when you’re ready to talk about it,” his voice cracked. The alpha moved on shaky limbs to the couch, sitting with his head in his hands. He threw insults at himself quietly, before standing up again, making his way back to your door. “Please, honey, let me in. I need to see you,” he was back to desperation. His knuckles grazing against the door again.
“Give her time,” Kyle soothed, through his own gritted teeth. He couldn't understand how John had been so reckless. He had obviously left the folders in an accessible spot. You wouldn't just go snooping around. Kyle just hoped you didn't think he had anything to do with it.
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It had been three hours. Your sobs had died down, making the house silent. That was almost worse. Kyle had talked him down multiple times from knocking your door down. The beta had to leave for training, leaving John by himself with his own thoughts. That had always been a deadly combination.
He had to relive it when Johnny came home, except the Scot wasn’t putting up with it. He grabbed a sharp tool out of his room, unlocking your door in five seconds flat. John stood up, but Johnny growled out a warning.
“Stay there,” he commanded. The alpha had no room to disagree with the burning beta. When they first met, John had assumed Johnny was an alpha based off of the way he carried himself.
“Peaches?” his voice was quiet and soft to not startle you.
“Go away,” you whined, making him wince.
“We had nothin’ to do with that, hen,” Johnny assured. He wasn't going to be in the doghouse because of the Captain’s mistake. Maybe on the field- but not when it comes to you. His hand reached out resting against your heated back. The emotional toll is already making you feel sick. You were burning up with a fever. “Come here, please,” it wasn't so much of a request as it was an order. You lifted your head up from the pillows, your raw eyes looking up at his. He whined low in his throat. His arms darting under your armpits, to pull you on top of him. You started sobbing again, the sounds hitting John on the other side of the door like a ton of bricks. You curled yourself against Johnny. You needed comfort, despite being mad at the world and everyone in it.
“He didn’t want me,” you mumbled sadly. “I called him alpha. I opened up to him. I trusted him. I slept with him. And the whole time he was wishing I was someone else,” you whined out. Johnny understood your hurt- he felt your hurt, yet he also knew that wasn't true in the slightest. John loved you madly.
“That's not true, Bon. He’s absolutely mad for you. He wouldn't trade you for anything or anyone. He had done it before he even met you, and he did it just to be obnoxious because Kate was pushing for you so hard and we weren't too keen on an omega- you know that,” Johnny reminded. You didn't want to be talked off the ledge. You wanted to jump. You wanted to be mad and be hurt without it being invalidated.
“But I wasn't enough to change his mind. Just one look at her on paper and she had him considering getting an omega,” you shot back. You tried pulling yourself away, wanting to find comfort in your sheets and not in the arms of Johnny. He didn't let you.
“Maybe for a split second, Bonnie. But if he had put any more thought into the situation he would've picked you. I know he would've,” Johnny reasoned. You weren't in the mood for reasoning.
“You can't prove that, Johnny. If he already had it in his mind that she would've been the better fit then I doubted I could've changed that,” your voice raised. John kept his ear against the door, his heart twisting painfully. “The only reason I was let into this pack was because Simon was hurt. He didn't care what omega Kate had picked for him as long as he could use them.” you had pulled yourself off of him, moving to a stand.
“Exactly! He didn't care which one he got. He didn't have his heart set on her bonnie. If he did he would've asked for her. You weren't written off because he didn't want you, you were written off because if he had approved you, you would've been flown out here the next day and none of us were ready for that yet. I know the reason you joined the pack feels like you were being used and you were. We’ll all admit that. But that's the world we come from, Bonnie. We are all puppets for our higher-ups to get what they want. They ship us off to the corners of the earth to fight in some war that no one, besides them, has reaped any benefits from. We are all being used in some way and you were too when you joined the pack. But I can promise you this, beautiful- and I can speak for everyone when I say we love you so fucking much. You're the best thing that has happened to us and we wouldn't trade you for anything,” he finished, his voice cracking at the last sentence.
You hated that his words made everything feel alright again. You still had lingering resentment at John and you probably would for a while- and every time you thought about it. But Johnny had made some good points- sincere points. Besides you had pulled a similar stunt with Simon not too long ago, and he managed to forgive you. You rested your head against Johnny’s shoulder, letting your body weight fall against him. You just needed some sleep.
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You had woken up to a knock at your door. You were by yourself, but you could still feel the warmth of Johnny against the sheets.
“Come in,” you groaned. You needed water. It was John, carrying a takeout container of food. It was too dark for you to make out too much of him, yet you could feel the emotion dripping off of him.
“You need to eat,” He said softly. He flicked your desk light on. His beard was unkempt from him running his fingers through it. His eyes were so red and puffy, you were sure it was agonizing to blink. It hurt you to see him that way- yet you looked no better. His hand darted out, a natural instinct to guide you to your chair. You dodged away from him, sitting down yourself. He sighed, slowly sitting down on the edge of your bed. You remained silent. You didn't want to eat the food he had brought you- you didn't want to give him the satisfaction of taking care of you (like he always had), but you were starved, not having eaten since this morning. He remained quiet as you scarfed down your meal, his fingers picking at the calluses on his palms.
You closed it up, taking a few gulps of the water he had brought. You flicked the light back off beginning to get back into bed, until he grabbed you. You squirmed against him mumbling a few ‘let me go’s.’ He paid no mind holding you against his chest, his legs trapping you between them.
He buried his face in your neck, his grip on your constricting.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, making you halt. He sounded so small. He was no longer the booming alpha whose mere presence offered your protection and stability. Now he was afraid. Afraid that you didn't want him anymore. Afraid that you didn't want to be here. Afraid that you had regretted what had happened between the two of you. “I can't have you despise me, sweetheart. I just can't,” he whispered. Since you've joined he’s been discovering new things about himself every day. He was quicker to fall in love than he thought. He could be a good alpha to an omega. He was also weaker than he thought. If you had told him four months ago a little omega he was still getting to know could bring him to his knees so quickly he would’ve told you to fuck off.
His sad scent was seeping into you, softening the chilled edges of your heart. He was regretful, you could tell. You relaxed into him causing him a sigh of relief. “I love you,” he murmured. You didn't say it back and he didn't expect you to. “So much,” he continued.
“You didn't mean it, John,” you replied softly, your hand resting against his back. You may have forgiven, but you weren't going to forget so easily. He could tell by your tone. You could get in your head so easily. He supposed he could too. He pressed a kiss against your cheek, finally letting you go. You remained against him for a moment, before pulling away. He stayed solemn as he grabbed the containers off your desk, heading back towards the door. He paused by the door, resisting the urge to beg you to let him stay. To let him curl himself around you and make everything better. He settled for a quiet ‘goodnight’ the door shutting behind him.
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He wasn't sure how you'd take the information. He couldn't imagine you’d be happy- he prayed you wouldn't be. That would be the ultimate jab.
“Sweetheart,” He greeted. You looked up from your phone, offering him a small smile. Things had been awkward between the two of you- not that you had had much contact since last night.
“We have a new assignment. Me and Kyle leave in two hours,” He explained. When your face fell he was relieved. What if you were just sad for Kyle? He chewed back the thought.
“How long will you be gone?” You questioned.
“Shouldn't be more than a week. It’s a fairly easy one,” he sighed. It was silent for a moment. You leaned forward, wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders.
“I’ll miss you,” you breathed. You started to pull away but he held you there. He just needed a moment longer.
When you saw Kyle you nearly tackled him over, your face smushing against his. He tried not to take it personally. You were still hurt. Feeling like you were second best and unwanted. He had to understand that. He was trying to understand that. Hopefully, his being gone will soften you.
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“Come on pups, time for your walks,” Simon spoke, grabbing a pack of cigarettes off the counter and his mask. Vernie had learned that whenever Simon grabbed his cigarettes it was time for a walk. She wormed her way out of your lap, bounding over to the door. Simon attached her leash holding it out for you. It was dark out. The night sky making you think of your first kiss- then John.
You three walked along a walking path, Simon making sure to put himself between you and groups of jogging soldiers.
“Simon?” you asked. He grunted in response.
“How did you get over me not putting you down as my alpha? That must've felt like a rejection,” you questioned. While they weren't entirely in the same situation, you felt maybe Simon could offer you some advice.
“It did,” he replied bluntly. “But then I realized I hadn't been acting too alpha-ish to you. Then you heard me say all that bullshit that night so I didn't have any room to be upset at you anymore,” he explained, guiding you off to the side. He pulled out his cigarettes, rolling his mask up to his nose. You bit back a giggle. “I’m still surprised you weren't more upset about it,” he sighed. “At least not that you've shown.”
You would still think about his words- less and less over the past few weeks. You don't know why but they didn't burn you as much as John's actions had. Maybe it was because your feelings were stronger for John? Or maybe it was because you knew deep down Simon didn't mean it. But John's actions had confirmed a belief you had about not being good enough. You gasped softly. That was it.
“Confirmation bias,” you gasped. Simon narrowed his eyes at you. “John didn't think I was good enough to be in the pack- and I had already felt that way. That's why it still hurts so bad,” you explained your thought process.
“You need to get that out of your head,” Simon spoke. “It wasn't like we all sat around and discussed every omega and came to the conclusion someone was a better fit than another. The old man probably didn't even have his glasses on when he was skimming through the profiles,” Simon huffed. He knew his Captain. Every decision he made was well thought out and concise. If he had really wanted to pick an omega he would’ve interviewed each of you himself, made you fill out a ten-page survey, and discuss it with each member of the pack individually. Also, Laswell had sent the papers electronically, he had just printed off a copy to mess with. Probably after a rough mission and one too many whiskeys. The rest of your sentence finally hit him. “What do you mean not good enough?”
“Well, I mean you know,” you started, shrugging.
“No, I don't bloody know. That's why I'm asking,” he shot back.
“Kate has always said what an indispensable and vital pack you are. That's all anyone here talks about. Omegas come up to me all the time and ask what it's like to be a part of this pack, or how I got into this pack. Nobody believes I got in by just being myself,” you explained.
“They don't know you then,” he snapped. “Then they'd be askin’ why we were daft enough to go so long without you,” he pressed the rest of his cigarette out, grabbing another from the pack.
“Simon?”
“Yes, pup,” he sighed.
“Kiss me?”
He paused the cigarette still hanging between his lips, the flame just a few centimeters away. “What?” he asked out of the corner of his mouth.
“Please?” you breathed. Your hands reached out gripping the front of his jacket. His heart hammered in his chest, your eyes staring up at him wide and wanting. His hands covered yours, not making any move to push them off. He couldn't break himself away, his eyes holding yours as his head lowered. He stopped right in front of you, his lips brushing against yours. You stared back equally enthralled. You closed the distance, your eyes fluttering shut, as you pressed your mouth against his. He reciprocated instantly, pushing his head forward to deepen this kiss. Your hands moved up to hold his jaw and he quickly grabbed the leash from you not wanting it to get in the way of you touching him. Your hands cupped his face, pulling him impossibly closer, gasping when his teeth nipped your bottom lip. He smirked against you and you had half a mind to pull away as punishment until he backed you against a tree. You gasped his name, making him groan against you, his hands digging into the fabric around your hips.
He hoisted you up, his neck already growing sore. His kisses were exactly like your relationship with him. Starting off sweet, then a battle of teeth and tongue, then back to sweet before you could decide which one you liked best. You pulled away with a deep inhale, your lungs burning from forgetting to breathe. He ‘tsked’ softly, pressing kisses against your jaw.
“Don’t know how he didn't mark you, sweet girl. I'd be sinking my jaws into you the moment you’re under me,” he mumbled, his teeth nipping against your neck in emphasis. You moaned quietly, making him smile. He pressed one last kiss against your neck, setting you back down on wobbly feet. “Don’t look at me like that, pup. We’re in public,” he reprimanded playfully, handing you back Vernie’s leash. “Besides I’m not done playing hard to get,” he chuckled. Your phone buzzed in your pocket making you jolt. You pulled it out, seeing John’s number, pressing the red button before you really thought about it.
“The fuck was that?” he growled. “Call him back,” he urged. You quickly did as you were told, not quite sure why you had done that in the first place.
He answered immediately.
“I’m sorry,” you apologized quickly.
“S’alright. Just figured you weren't in the mood to talk, pretty,” he cleared his throat. You wondered how much he had hurt in those seconds you denied his call. “Just wanted to let you know me and Kyle are where we’re supposed to be.” he explained.
“Good. Good,” you replied softly. You were quiet for a moment. “John, I love you. You know that right?” you breathed. You heard him inhale sharply on the other line, before clearing his throat again. You could feel yours constrict as well.
“Thank you, sweetheart.” He breathed back. He needed that. He needed to know you weren't back home stewing at him. “I love you and I’ll talk to you soon, yeah?”
“I’ll be waiting,” you responded, your eyes blurring at the tightness in his voice. “Bye.”
“Bye, pretty girl.”
You buried your face in Simon’s chest, wrapping your arms around him as you cried lowly. You wished John was back, so you could curl up in his arms again. You wished you hadn't given him the cold shoulder before he left. What if something happened while he was away and your last physical interaction was you worming your way out of a hug? His hug.
“Easy, pup,” Simon soothed. His hands smoothing over your back. He wanted to scold you for not answering the first time. He could only imagine how John was feeling after being shipped away while not on the best terms with you. It was hard enough when you were on good terms. “Need a cigarette?” Simon questioned making you chuckle after your crying had slowed. You shook your head softly. He kept an arm around you, beginning the trek back home. “Don’t worry about it, pup. You've got a lot on your mind. Sometimes people do things without meaning harmful intent,” he soothed. You caught the double meaning of his words, and you pressed yourself closer.
“Simon. What would happen if something were to happen to you out there and you couldn't be sent back to base?”
He sucked in air through his teeth.
“Well we would get to the safest spot we could and try to be fixed up enough to be sent back here,” he explained.
“What if you couldn't though? Be sent back here?” you pressed.
“What would you want to happen?” he questioned. He didn't want to put ideas out there you weren't comfortable with. The easiest way to get the answer you wanted was by making you say it yourself.
“I’d want to be sent to where you were. No matter where it is or how dangerous it is. I'd want to be with you,” you nearly demanded.
“That's why you were paired with us, pup,” Simon smirked. “You’re just as brave and stupid as the rest of us.”
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Hi friends! See you in three days for chapter 26! 🧡
418 notes · View notes
yourmidnightlover · 2 years
Text
truth or dare... don't lie
pairing: xavier thorpe x fem!reader
summary: during a game of truth or dare, a secret about reader is revealed that xavier offers to help her out with.
warnings: SMUT LMAO, unprotected PIV, fingering, oral (F receiving), virgin!reader, kinda soft sex tbh, reader loses her v-card bc i'm projecting, kent, bianca, and yoko are kinda mean in this i'm not gonna lie, theres a bit of angst at first but then it gets really smutty and comforting
a/n: THIS IS NOT EDITED! i AM working on a part two to my series, but i have finals this week and can't focus enough to develop the plot how i planned so you're getting this instead to tide you over... wooo! enjoy horn-dogs :)
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"it's your turn, y/n!" bianca started giggling as she took another sip of whatever alcoholic mixture she decided to deliver this time.
somehow you, enid, wednesday, ajax, xavier, bianca, kent, and yoko were playing a skewed version of truth or dare in xaviers single room. basically, it was the same premise of you choose a truth or a dare, but if you didn't complete the task or answer the truth then you had to strip. so... strip truth or dare.
it's not like anyone really cared, it was a week before winter break, and everyone had already finished their exams for the semester. luckily you were even able to have thing sneak into the teachers' lounge and bag some extra goodies, which was mostly only alcohol and little debbie snacks.
"what'll it be, y/l/n?" bianca continued to ask you. "truth or dare... or strip?"
you see, there was one MORE issue at hand...
you were down to your dress.
having already taken off your jacket, socks, and even your necklace, you were desperate to remain in the game with your integrity intact, although you were sure most of them wouldn't remember a thing because they had drank so much. except for wednesday, something about making sure enid got back to the dorm safely... blah blah blah.
well, and xavier, but you weren't sure why he wasn't drinking much on his end. maybe he was simply uncomfortable with it, or wanted to be the designated walk-er, helping everyone to their respective dorms. that's part of why you like him so much. he's so sweet and thoughtful, even when people choose to inebriate themselves beyond belief with alcohol. it wouldn't happen, and you know that. but a little schoolgirl crush never hurt anyone, right?
regardless, you needed something easy, so you remained covered and not embarrassed, "truth."
"boring!" enid rang out, hands cupping around her mouth to symbolize a megaphone.
"she is down to just her dress and whatever is underneath," wednesday pointed out with a nod. you turned to see xavier simply looking down at his phone, more than uninterested in the game.
"fine," you sighed. "i choose dare," you said smugly, noticing xaviers eyebrows raise as he made eye contact with you before you abruptly looked the other direction.
"there we go!" bianca clapped as the others cheered with her. "that's what i'm talking about y/n," she put her finger to her chin as if she were in deep thought with a quiet 'hmmm,' "i dare you to sit in xavier's lap for the rest of the game!"
"really?" your surprise was practically impossible to hide. "i don't think he'd be very comfortable with that, b."
"i'm cool with it if you are, y/n/n," he gave you a smile, one that you didn't recognize. it wasn't his 'i'm proud of you smile' or his 'you fucked up again' smile, no. this was a new one. this one seemed darker. mysterious. enticing.
you liked it.
"i-i'm cool with it," and with that, you got up and walked in his direction.
he had been sitting at his desk the whole time, in his comfy little chair. he pat his lap three times before you rolled your eyes at him and sat down on his lap, facing the same way as him. you tried not to put much weight on him, so you opted to sit on the very edge of his knees and let your tiptoes hold most of your weight.
"okay that can't be comfortable," xavier pointed out. "here," he carefully lifted you just enough to maneuver you over his lap, now sideways with your back against one armrest and your feet dangling over the other. "better?"
"mhmm, thanks," you smiled as you clasped your hands in your lap, one of xavier's arms still wrapped around your waist comfortably. it felt nice, like it belonged there.
from there on the game got a bit more... risqué. now there were kisses dared on cheeks, first time stories being drawn out, and so much more.
"xavier," ajax pointed at him, slurring his words with a big grin decorating his face. "truth or dare!"
"hmm..." he acted deep in thought. "dare."
"i dare you..." he clearly hadn't thought that far in advance, which is when enid leaned over and whispered something you couldn't make out to him. "oh that's good!," ajax whisper yelled, not being able to properly sense his own volume. "i dare you, xavier, to kiss y/n on the neck until your next turn!"
you turned to face him, your lips pressed into a thin line, praying that he couldn't see the rosy red blush that was surely adorning your cheeks by now.
"are you okay with that?" he asked, whispering in your ear so the others couldn't hear. once he got your quiet, but detectable 'mhmm,' he accepted the dare. "alright," with that, he got to work.
he pressed a feather-light kiss to your neck at first, and you thought you would be fine if this is what he would be doing the entire time. that was, until he began to press slightly open-mouthed kisses to your neck, occasionally gently nipping the area before soothing over it with his tongue.
there was no doubt in your mind that he could tell your heartbeat was racing. between feeling his hair brushing on the sensitive skin, and his tongue soothing his love-bites, you were about to explode. your hips were practically moving on their own at this point, trying to get whatever friction you could.
"hey," you felt xavier's hands grab your hips firmly. "if you don't stop moving your hips like that there's gonna be a mess between us that i really don't wanna clean up."
"what do you-" he shifted your hips up a bit more, hitting something a bit harder than his thighs were. "oh-is-is that...?"
"yea," he got closer to your ear, beginning to suck on the lobe and continuing his ministrations.
"in the school bathroom!" bianca rang out, laughing at whatever story kent was telling this time.
"i think it's y/n's turn again," kent diverted everyone's attention to you, so you tried to ignore xavier sucking on your neck like a leech, albeit a really hot one, to get through this.
"oh, and it's my turn," yoko cheered. "truth or dare, y/n?"
you really didn't think you'd be able to survive whatever dare they would throw your way, not in the slightest, which is why you chose: "truth."
"alright," yoko looked towards bianca and kent before asking, "what was your first time like?"
ajax might as well have ripped his beenie off then and there because you froze. you hadn't done it. you haven't gotten past giving a guy a handjob, let alone sex.
you didn't know how long you were quiet for, but you did notice when xavier stopped his kissing. you could practically feel his stare right on your face. you wanted it to go away. you wanted to disappear. it was humiliating, really. at least you thought it was until...
"you haven't, have you?" kent chuckled as bianca stifled a laugh.
"are you serious?" yoko asked incredulously. "well, i guess it makes sense to me," she shrugged as you tore yourself off of xavier's body, having to pry his hand away from your waist.
"hey," he held onto your hand softly and looked at you with what you thought to be puppy-dog eyes, you didn't have the best view due to the tears blocking your eyes.
"just..." you sighed as you took your hand out of his and ran out of his room, dorm, and the building as a whole. you just wanted to walk around, feel comfortable. then it hit you that there was always one place where you felt comfortable.
after around 15 minutes of walking around to clear your head, you got to xavier's paint shed. you had gone there nearly every time you needed help with homework, needed some advice, or if you simply missed him. it's amazing that even though he wasn't there, you could still smell his presence, the mahogany and woods scent that felt like home to you now.
you had made several forts in the place before, having secret sleepovers with each other countless times just because you wanted to. so, you brought out the mattress that was set up against the wall, put the fitted sheet on it and set up the bed as usual before plopping down on it.
you didn't even want to cry anymore. you just wanted to disappear. you felt like such a loser. i mean, why is that such a big deal anyway? it's just sex. but then again, if it's 'just sex' then why haven't you just done it?
"y/n/n?" xaviers voice called out as he knocked on the door of the shed. "look, i know you're in there. just wanted you to know that i kicked everyone out, okay?" you stayed quiet. "y/n," he sighed. "you know that just because you haven't... yknow, doesn't mean anything right? what yoko was saying... she doesn't make sense. because anyone would be so lucky to have you. you're unbelievably kind, and generous, witty, hilarious... and beautiful. you're beautiful, y/n. please just let me in? i wanna talk to your face, not some door."
you sniffled with a laugh, "it's been unlocked the whole time, idiot."
"hey, now," he called as he walked through the door, ducking down a little as to not hit his head on the low hanging fixtures. "why'd you run like that?" he as beside you on the bed, placing your long-forgotten items of clothing on one of the tables.
"why wouldn't i?" you turned the question on him. "i was humiliated," you began to pick at your nails. "i mean, you saw what happened. i was already flustered because you were kissing my neck and then i felt your boner because i couldn't just sit fucking still, which was embarrassing enough, but then the guy i like finds out i'm a virgin too! it was just too much. and then they were laughing at me and.... yea," you took a deep breath once you were done rambling.
"the guy you like?"
"you can't tell me you still don't know," you rolled your eyes once more before xavier grabbed onto your hands to stop you from picking at them like he normally does. "you. you know. it's you."
he didn't even say anything. it wasn't until you mustered up the courage to look at him that you saw a smile gracing his face.
"then you should know why ajax and enid dared me to do that to you in the first place," xavier scooted closer to you on the bed. placing one of his hands on your thigh. "i told them a couple weeks ago that i was starting to really, really like you-as more than friends. they went crazy, telling me you felt the same and everything, but i couldn't believe it. i mean, you're just... you're everything, y'know?
"i meant everything i said when i was outside. you're so sweet, and smart, and god, it takes everything in me not to kiss you when you look at me. because when you look at me, you really see me," xavier finished.
"kiss me," you told him in a soft tone.
"what?" his brows furrowed before you, with a shocking wave of confidence, swung one leg over his lap, now facing him and straddling his lap. his hands went to your waist
"i said kiss me," you leaned in closer to him. "please."
it didn't take anything else for him to bring one hand up to cup your face before finally connecting your lips. it wasn't like fireworks went off, or cannons bursted. it was more like a sense of belonging, welcomeness, and home. your lips had been craving him for so long, it was a sweet, cold treat in the summer as your tongues began to glide with one another.
once again, your hips couldn't contain themselves as they began to rock back and forth on his lap, this time successfully getting the desired friction exactly where you wanted it. you sighed into his mouth, your hands dragging through his hair as he began to nurse the same neck he was kissing nearly 45 minutes ago.
"i thought that would be the only time i'd have you to myself," xavier droned on. "i might've gone a bit overboard..." he laughed as he traced circles on your neck.
"what...?" you backed away from him before he picked up his phone, showing you with the selfie side of the camera how he had littered your neck with deep hickeys. "xavier!" you playfully shoved his shoulder.
"you better get used to it," he shrugged with a sly grin. "i can be territorial at times."
"god, as if you couldn't get any hotter," you began to peel off your dress, reaching for the hem before xavier swatted your hands away.
"let me," he ordered, you listened immediately, retracting your hands and placing them on his shoulders as he helped you rid yourself of your dress. "i don't even understand why you wore this since it's freezing outside."
"hmm," you mockingly acted like you were thinking. "well, when the guy i like is going to be in a place with booze, there might be certain possibilities and i wanted to look nice."
"you look better than nice," he pressed your lips together once more. "i was hard long before you even sat on my lap, y/n/n."
"please fuck me?" your voice was soft and whiny. "please? i want you, i just need you to-to y'know... please, xay?"
"you sound so pretty when you beg for me," he let his hand trace your neck before he buried his hand in your hair, gently tugging it back before admiring you in your nearly naked state.
"xay, please?" you were holding onto the hem of his t-shirt, nearly stretching it out with your begging.
"okay, love," he chuckled before swiftly tossing his shirt over his head, letting it land somewhere he wasn't concerned with. "now we're a bit more even, yea?"
"i just... i need you..." you were a squirming mess in his lap, to think an hour and a half ago you were pleading with yourself to keep your dignity and now you were begging for xavier...
"what do you need from me?" he teased, letting one of his hands trail down your front, hovering over your center. "i need to hear you say it for me. tell me."
"i need you," you sighed as you buried your head in his neck. "i need you to make me... make me cum?"
he chuckled maniacally, "is that a question? i thought i told you to tell me what you want?"
"please just make me cum xavier!" your frustration showed as you began to lazily press kisses to his neck. "please?"
he swiftly turned over so you were laying on the pillow at the top of the bed, him hovering over you with his hair falling to your face. he began pressing kisses down your body, gently squeezing your breasts and sucking on your nipples. eventually, after a few minutes of teasing, he reached your center. he moved your panties down your legs and began pressing kisses to your thighs, alternating between each one.
"has anyone ever done this for you before?" you shook your head 'no.' "is it alright if i do?"
"anything, xay, anything, please," you nodded as your hands tangled into his hair.
he pressed gentle kisses around your clit before licking one line through your slit, lapping up your juices like a man starved. you heard him moan into your pussy, the vibrations shooting through your core shocking you more than you thought possible. you reactively tugged on his hair, tossing your head back as he continued, now sucking gently, very softly, on your clit.
"oh my fuck," you breathed out, looking down at xavier to find his eyes fixated on you and your reaction. "god, you look so pretty, xay."
you felt him smile against your pussy, not letting himself get distracted by little compliments that he was sure melted his heart completely. one of his hands was gripping your thigh so hard you were sure there would be marks the next morning, the other hand was placed on your lower stomach, pressing down just slightly. he used the hand that was rasping your thigh and gently pushed a single finger in.
your mouth formed in an 'o' shape at the intrusion. his fingers were much longer than your own, and when he curled it inside of you, you swore you could see stars in his eyes as he continued to suck and kiss your clit. he gently thrusted his finger in and out a few times before adding a second finger.
"please don't stop," you were gripping his hair so tight you were surprised it hadn't ripped out. "'m so close, xay."
he stopped sucking your clit momentarily to say: "be sure to look at me when you cum."
you nodded dumbly as he got back to work, and it wasn't long until you were at that edge that no other man has ever been successful in bringing you to. at first you threw your head back before you remembered what you had promised him. with a few more thrusts of his fingers, you saw the look of pride on his face when he felt you squeezing his fingers in a vice grip, your mouth dropped open completely as pornographic moans left your mouth.
"fuck, yes, xavier!" you ground against his mouth as he worked you down from your high. "holy shit," your chest was heaving as he kissed his way back up your body.
he hovered over you as he sucked on the same two fingers that were just inside you, groaning, "did i tell you how amazing you taste?"
"will you fuck me now?" you reached down between the two of you to palm him through his sweatpants. "i really, really want you."
"i don't want you to just want to do this because you want to get it over with," you could sense the sincerity in his tone. "i want this to be more than just a hookup."
"it's not, xavier," you cupped his face with one hand. "i assure you, it's not," you smiled as he pressed your foreheads together. "you mean so much more to me than just one amazing night, xay."
"are you sure you want to do this?"
"yes."
"wait, i don't have anything..." xavier hinted with a worried look on his face.
"well, i'm obviously clean, and i've been on the pill since the eighth grade," you shrugged. "if you want..."
"really?" his eyes widened at the thought, you nodded. "i've never... shit. this'll be a new experience for the both of us."
after a bit of shuffling, xavier lined himself up at your entrance, looking at you one more time for confirmation. as he entered you, it was like the wind was knocked out of you. your arms wrapped around his neck as he continued to push himself into you. at a certain point, you thought it was never-ending.
"god, you're so tight," he breathed into your neck, pressing a kiss to one of your hickeys as he continued.
your head was thrown back as he finally bottomed out in you, one of your arms wrapped around his waist while the other was around his neck with your hand buried in his hair.
"so deep," you closed your eyes at the sensation. "'s like you're in my stomach, holy fuck."
he pressed down on that same spot he had earlier, very gentle, but you felt it so, so much. "is that where?" you nodded fervently.
"please move, xay, please," your hand was practically clawing at his back.
"i'm gonna go slow, okay?" you nodded at his words. "if you change your mind about anything at all, say the word and i'll stop, alright?"
"okay," you agreed with a smile as he slowly pulled back out before reentering at the exact same pace.
with each thrust, his pace increased. your moans' volume increased too. it was as if each whimper, moan, and plea was simply egging him on and bringing him to the end of that wonderful precipice of pleasure.
"you look fucking perfect," his own groans and huffs of pleasure rang out. "such pretty tits," he messily grabbed one of them. when he brought his hand down to play with your clit, you knew you weren't going to last much longer. "and such a pretty pussy for me. all mine, y/n/n. all mine."
"god, it's-i'm..." you were cut off by a guttural moan. "i need to cum. i'm gonna cum! xavier, please don't stop! please!"
"where do you want it?"
"inside, please!" you huffed out, clawing at his back as you whimpered in his ear. "need it so bad."
"say you're mine," he ordered. you could feel his dick pulsing inside of you.
"i'm-oh god," you cried out once more, tears forming at your lash line. "i'm yours! i've always been yours, xay, please! fuck!" for the second time, xavier was able to bring you off that cliff, this time he followed suit.
"so fucking pretty when you cum," xavier added before with a few more thrusts, his thick cum coated your walls. "oh fuck."
"oh my god," you sighed out as xavier slumped against your body, laying completely on top of you.
"you got that right," you could feel his smile against your shoulder before he began to press kisses against your warm skin. "here," he reluctantly got up from his position after carefully pulling out of you, tucking himself back into his sweats, and reached for one of his recently cleaned towels (he had a rotation for them, alright?). he began to wipe up your thighs, being very gentle at your center.
"xavier?" you called before he laid back down.
"yea?" he looked at your worriedly before you smiled, simply asking: "can i wear your shirt to sleep?"
a bright smile made its way to his face, "of course, yea," he helped you poke your arms and head through the shirt before he stepped back, admiring you in it. "i almost like this on you more than nothing on you. almost."
"xavier!" you called before shoving him to the side. "you perv."
"you like this 'perv,' as you call it," he rolled his eyes as he began to cuddle with you on the mattress.
"i wanna lay on you," you tried to get onto your knees to maneuver your way on top before he had to catch your arm.
"let me help you a bit," he tried to hide his smug smile while he rolled the two of you over.
"i'm never gonna live this down," you shook your head as he raked his fingers through your hair.
"nope," you laid in the most comfortable silence for a few minutes before he spoke again: "y/n?"
"mhmm?"
"i might've lied earlier when i said that i told ajax and enid that i liked you," you could sense a bit of restriction in his tone.
"what do you mean?" you held your breath.
"i told them the truth," he pressed a kiss to your forehead, getting your attention so you were looking in his eyes. "that i'm in love with you."
9K notes · View notes
b1rkins · 10 months
Text
✦ ALL COVERED, L. NORRIS
nobody knows about the relationship between lando and the famous cooking influencer is real, not until george and himself (accidentally) spoil it.
fc: tess maylo
₊˚⊹౨ৎ ⋆。✦
yourusername
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yourusername ta-da! slightly burnt and super sweet fruit cake is ready!! see you next week loves<3
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yourusername
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yourusername winter baking❄️ see you next timeeee
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landonorris
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landonorris rodeo-ing
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username it's him being drunk or is he just hard launching
username LANDO???? Y/N????? WAIT HOLD ON WAIT A MINUTE
username oh so it's him who makes her forgot about her baking
⤷ carlossainz55 sorry in advance, he left his brain home
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landonorris added to their story!
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yourusername added to their story!
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caption: gala tonight💌
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f1updates
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liked by maxverstappen1, username, and 32,590 more
f1updates mclaren driver, lando norris is seen sharing a sweet kiss in the middle of busy brooklyn street with a cooking influencer, y/n l/n. many sources said that they've dated since a couple months ago, with this is their private date in y/n's house in brooklyn.
click the link in our bio to read more of our stories!
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username i mean with lando's ACCIDENTAL story and post and he do it TWICE LIKE GIRL PLS JUST POST HER FACE ALREADY
⤷ username yeah like bfr
username bro what??? PRIVATE DATE?? but if it's private how do yall get the pics?
username there's a lot of hidden paps around
username the tea's so good max is already liking this
⤷ username max is us tho
username HELP Y/N IS NOT LIVESTREAMING TOO💀💀💀
⤷ username what the hell is it really???
username just respect their privacy pls
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caption: our last bake for the season! see you soon next season
yourusername and landonorris
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yourusername it's all covered until it's not. i love you so much my lovely<333
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vivwritesfics · 8 months
Text
White Wedding
His brother was getting married to her sister. Of course they were bound to fall in love - (grumpy x sunshine)
Arthur Leclerc x Reader
limiting the use of y/n in this one, but a few might slip through the cracks
2.5K
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"Charles, you're joining the L/N family, God help you."
She threw the cue card to the side. That was lame, she decided as she neatened up the rest of the cue cards. She read the one on the top, sucked in a deep breath, and looked into her mirror. "Charles," she said to herself. "Before you joined our family, I knew nothing about Motorsport. Now, it is your fault that I spend every Sunday on the couch, watching cars go in circles."
Yeah, that was better, much better.
If it wasn't enough that she'd planned her sisters entire wedding, she was now having to write a speech for it. She was the maid of honour and her sister had thrust almost all of the responsibility onto her. She'd done almost everything, with one of the few exceptions being choosing the dress.
The speech she started three weeks before the wedding. That was how long she thought it was going to take to write it. And, at this rate, she was right.
Her phone vibrated on her bed and she rushed to pick it up. Her thumb double tapped against the screen and it lit up, revealing a text from her sister. The wonderful sister who's wedding she'd just spent months planning.
Come meet me and Charles in the café xx
Fine, she sent back and threw her phone back onto the bed. She sucked in a deep breath and went back to practicing the introduction of her speech. "Charles." She held her pause before practicing the rest of her speech.
***
She walked into the café and immediately walked up to the counter. Ordering a simple coffee, she scanned over the tables in the café, searching for her sister and her fiancé.
Ann and Charles had been dating for two years before he popped the question. For the first year he took Ann to as many races as he could, but, in their second year of dating, Ann had to work. She had to save for the wedding. Sure, Charles had money, but Ann wasn't going to let him spend every penny he had on them. She wanted to pay what she could towards the wedding.
Being the great sister she was, Y/N agreed to watch it with her sister. She sat on the couch with her every single Sunday, no matter the time of day, to watch Charles drive.
Her name was called and she grabbed her coffee from the counter. After locating Ann, Charles, and somebody she had yet to meet, she walked over and sat herself in the empty seat.
"Hi love," Ann said the moment she sat down. She smiled politely at her sister and offered her a bite of cookie.
She refused politely and sipped her coffee as she looked around the table. "Who is this?" She asked. It may have come across as rude, but she was so burnt out from planning the wedding that she didn't much care.
"This is my brother, Arthur," Charles said as he threw his arm around the man sat next to him.
As soon as Charles said it, she could see it. They looked so alike, they could have almost be twins. "He's my best man." Arthur gave her a dimpled smile.
She turned her attention to Arthur. He was handsome, sure, but she was far too concentrated on the wedding to notice anything like that. "You're in charge of the bachelor party?" She asked and had a sip of coffee. "What've you got planned?"
Ann rolled her eyes as she covered her ears. In a hushed voice, Arthur told her his plans for the bachelor party. It was basic and not what she expected for the Charles Leclerc, but if that was what he wanted, that was what he was going to get.
"Is your date already included in the numbers and has she said what's she's eating?" She asked as she pulled her notebook from her bag. Her entire life was wedding planning at this point.
Arthur shook his head. "I don't have a date," he said, his cheeks dusted pink.
"Brilliant," she muttered under her breath. Immediately she realised what she'd said, but she didn't mean it that way. Him not bringing a date just made everything less complicated. "And how is your speech coming along?"
It was crazy how obsessed this girl was with a wedding that wasn't her own. Arthur looked at his brother and then back at the girl. "It's coming along," he said and she noted something down in her notebook.
She went into the back of her notebook, wrote something down, ripped it out, and passed it to Arthur. "My number. Send me a picture of the groomsmen suits when you've got a chance," she said stood up.
She sent them a polite goodbye and walked out of the cafe. Ann, Arthur and Charles watched them go. "Sorry about her," said Ann as she turned to Arthur. "She's just stressed about the wedding."
The wedding that wasn't hers.
***
It was three in the morning, two weeks before the wedding. She was supposed to be fast asleep, but she was still practicing her speech. Her now finished speech.
Her phone vibrated on her bed, and it didn't stop.
Arthur L
He had no contact picture attached; she didn't know him well enough yet. She swiped her finger across the screen and pressed her phone to her ear. "It's three in the morning, this better be good," she said in quiet voice, like there was somebody she was trying not to wake up. In reality, her walls were thin in her shitty apartment and her neighbours were quick to anger.
"Y/N? IT'S ARTHUR!" The youngest Leclerc shouted. She pulled the phone away from her ear from the sheer volume of it. "LECLERC? MY BROTHER IS MARRYING YOUR SISTER?"
"Yeah, Arthur, I know who you are."
"DO YOU THINK YOU COULD PICK CHARLES AND I UP FROM THE CLUB? WE'RE A BIT DRUNK!"
That much she could already tell. "Fucking hell," she mumbled under her breath. "Tell me the name of the club," she said as she pulled on her hoodie and sweats.
That was how she found herself parked herself outside of the club as an incredibly drunk Arthur tried to get an even more drunk Charles into the back of her car. "God, you both stink," she said as Arthur climbed into the front of the car with her.
"Yeah, things got a bit out of hand," Arthur said as he turned on the radio.
Suddenly Charles was sitting up on the back seat. He bounced in his seat and sang along to the music playing from the radio. "Charles, Charles," Arthur said as he reached back for his brother, trying to get him to calm down.
She switched off the radio and Charles immediately calmed down. He slumped down in his seat, his eyes distant as he stared out of the window.
She made a decision then and there to take the Leclerc brothers back to her apartment. They could sleep in her bed while she slept on the couch. It was better than them dying in some stupid, drunken mishap two weeks before the wedding.
Arthur frowned as she pulled into the parking complex beneath her apartment. "Where are we?" He asked as she pulled into a parking space and put the car into park.
She killed the engine, opened her door and pulled Charles out of the back. "Can you walk on your own?" She asked him as she slung Charles's arm over her shoulders. Arthur nodded and she dragged Charles over to the elevator.
As they walked, Arthur grabbed Charles's other side and helped her to walk him up to her apartment. As soon as they were inside, she dropped him on the couch and went to the kitchen to get him some water.
When she returned, Arthur was talking to his brother. It was hushed and in French and she had no idea what he was saying. But Charles nodded under his breath. When his eyes moved to Y/N, Arthur stopped talking and sat beside his brother, holding his up as she handed him water.
After he had finished the water, she and Arthur worked together to get Charles into bed. They kept him in his boxers and pulled the blankets over his body.
Once they had made sure he was sleeping on his stomach, she and Arthur left the room. They returned to the living and, exhausted, the two of them sat on the sofa.
"I'm sorry," Arthur said, his head against the back of the sofa. "I didn't want to call Ann."
"I get it," she said as she pulled her legs beneath her. "My sister isn't the most responsible and she probably would have just joined the two of you. Why do you think I'm planning the wedding?"
She said the last part quietly, and Arthur snapped his head towards her. "Yeah, why are you planning the wedding?"
She played with his fingers, refusing to meet his eyes. "If Ann was planning the wedding, it wouldn't be happening," she said.
"That's unfair, isn't it?"
She shook her head. It didn't matter if it was unfair, she'd do anything for her big sister. "If Charles wanted something so bad but couldn't do it himself, wouldn't you do it for him?"
She stood and grabbed a blanket. "You can sleep in here," she said and passed him the blanket. Arthur gave her a grateful smile and laid the blanket over his body as she walked into her office.
***
Arthur hadn't left her alone since that night.
She wasn't complaining about the constant messages, even if she did have to mute him sometimes. And then when he'd bring her food while she caught up on the work that she'd missed while she'd been planning the wedding.
They spent more time together than she expected. He was annoying, and she didn't mind.
Two days before the wedding and she was incredibly stressed. Arthur could tell, and he knew he had to do something about it.
He turned up to her apartment with the nastiest, greasiest pizza available. For a man so healthy, it came as a great surprise when she opened the door to see it. "Is this serious?" She asked as she stepped to the side to let him in.
"Incredibly serious," he said as he sat on her sofa.
She looked at the pizza. "You know I have a dress to fit into, right?"
"If you can't fit into your dress, I won't be able to fit into suit."
He held out his hand and Y/N shook it. She sat beside him and grabbed her first slice of pizza, taking a moment to relax. "We have the rehearsal tomorrow," she muttered between slices. "I shouldn't be this stressed about a wedding that isn't mine."
"I'd hate to see you on your own wedding," Arthur muttered as he grabbed another slice.
"Who says you're invited."
He held his hand over his heart, offended. Or faking it. "You really think you could live without me?"
She shook her head as she leaned against him and, between them they finished the pizza.
Arthur never slept over. It would have been too weird for Ann and Charles, she reasoned every time she walked him to the front door. But, this time he stopped before he could walk out of the door. "Let me take you to the wedding," he said. "We can sit together and dance together and have a really good time," he said, leaning against the door frame.
She frowned. "Won't our families find that a bit weird?"
"Who cares?"
She thought about it for a moment. "Okay. As future siblings in law, okay."
She shut the door on him and went to bed, but she didn't sleep. The rehearsal was the next day and she was stressed. The L/N family, the Leclerc family, and all of the bride and grooms friends would be there, judging everything she'd spent the last few months doing. Ann would be judging everything she'd done for her wedding.
At the rehearsal dinner, Arthur swapped name cards so that he and Y/N were sat beside each other. She didn't mind, had laughed as he did so. It might have been the first time he'd seen her laugh.
She'd organised the speeches and which order everybody was going in. Charles first, as the groom, and then Y/N, and then Arthur. They had very few speeches, since Ann had said their father wasn't allowed to make a speech.
Lets cut to the ceremony. It was beautiful. She had made sure every had coordinated, that the bridesmaid dresses had complimented the flowers and the groomsmen ties had matched the bridesmaid dresses.
Her own dress was a slightly deeper colour than the bridesmaid dresses. As soon as she had shown it to Arthur, he made sure that his tie matched her dress.
The actual ceremony was beautiful. There were tears, which led to Ann panicking about her makeup. Charles held her as she went from his wife-to-be to his wife. As she went from Ann L/N to Ann Leclerc.
When it came to the speeches, suddenly Y/N couldn't do it. Charles had made his speech, finishing to a round of applause. But then it came time for her speech.
She sat there for a moment, her eyes wide. Arthur nudged her with his elbow and she shook her head. "Arthur, I can't," she said, staring straight ahead. Her speech was on the cue cards on her plate.
"Yes you can," Arthur said. "If you don't, you'll regret it."
But she still wasn't moving.
So, Arthur stood up. "My name is Arthur Leclerc and I'm French!" There was a collective round of booing (mostly from Charles). "And the sister of the bride has something she wants to say."
He sat back back down as Y/N stood up and glared at him. He was an asshole and she was going to kill him. But still, she made her speech and sat back down. "I'm gonna kill you," she whispered to Arthur as she set her cards down. But she couldn't be happier that she had actually made the speech.
She and Arthur danced together. Just as they said they would, they danced to the slow songs, danced to the fast songs, and had the best time together. "Thank you," she said as they danced together, swaying from side to side as they wrapped their arms around each other.
"For what?" He asked with him dimply smile as he looked down at her.
She sucked in a deep breath as she laid her head against his chest. "You've helped make today perfect," she said, closing her eyes. She reached up and kissed his cheek. "You're wonderful, Arthur Leclerc."
"You're wonderful, Y/N L/N."
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purple-babygirl · 7 months
Text
don't call me daddy
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x little!f!reader
Word count: 4,826
Summary : In a world where littles are openly themselves, they volunteer to help and be helped by willing caregivers. In spite of himself, Bucky finds himself stuck with one and to keep the nagging away, he has to learn how to be around her with everything that that entails.
Warnings: Bucky is mean, a couple of insults, mistreatment of age regressed reader, crying, mentions of hot liquid getting on skin, crying, mentions of the r-word and the s-word, Bucky's PTSD & nightmares
A/N: so this is an idea I've had for forever and I finally mustered up enough courage to share it with you guys. Please enjoy and let me know what you think and if you have anything you'd like to suggest for the upcoming parts. I love you 💜
~
“This sounds stupid,” Bucky grumbled when Sam suggested the program.
“It's not stupid, Buck and it works!”
“If it worked for you doesn't mean it's gonna work for me, Sam. You have patience and it's in your nature to want to take care of people.”
“Says the one who looked out for Steve all his life!”
“Steve was one person and he was actually dumb, he wasn’t acting like he can't fucking feed himself!”
“They're not acting. They're age regressed.” Sam tried to remain calm.
“What does that even mean!”
“It means—”
“You know what? I don't care because I'm not doing it.” Bucky smiled before leaving Sam's house and going back to hide in his own.
But Sam was persistent. He was determined to get Bucky help that would actually help. So he suggested the program to Bucky's therapist and before Bucky could punch him, she was having him sign the contract.
“Sam, I don't wanna meet anyone. It's not gonna work anyway so let's just pick any of them.”
“They're not service dogs, Bucky!”
“Really? Because that's exactly what it sounds like they are to me.”
Sam glared at him, elbowing his side as a short lady with a kind smile approached them.
Bucky didn't pay her much attention. He didn't want to be here and he didn't care what she was reciting.
Only thing that caught his attention was when she asked him what age he would prefer so she could introduce him to a group of littles.
He was dreading this. It was stupid.
“…what are you looking for?” Bucky caught the end of her talk with Sam.
“I don't know, someone who can talk like they're not retarded,” he answered the lady rudely and she smiled in understanding when Sam apologized.
“They're not retarded. All of them are perfectly healthy and okay. They're age regressed,” she told Bucky and he rolled his eyes so hard he felt they might never return from the back of his head.
He hated those two words. Age regressed, what the fuck did that even mean?
“Maybe we can meet some of the littles who are not so young, like 6 year olds?” Sam suggested and she nodded, leading them to a building with long corridors and lots of doors.
Bucky could see adult women and men playing with dolls, sleeping with pacifiers and some of them even had other people feeding them.
What the hell was this place? Did they expect him to do that? With a person perfectly capable of handling his or her own self but chooses not to?! Was this the 21st century? Because he didn’t like it very much.
The lady led them inside her office and got a group of files out of some organized drawer. She'd barely laid them out on the table before Bucky was slamming his finger on one.
“We'll take this one,” he said, staring at the lady in disinterest.
“But you haven't even seen them,” Sam said between his teeth, kicking his leg under the table. He wished Bucky cared enough to do this right.
“I've seen enough. I pick this file and I wanna leave,” Bucky seethed back.
“This is Doll. She's one of the softest littles I've ever met and I think you've made a great choice, Mr. Barnes.”
“You call her Doll?”
“Yes, real names aren't revealed for the privacy of our littles unless they decide otherwise and she chose the name herself when she joined us.” The lady smiled kindly, making Bucky even madder.
“Whatever, let's get this over with. Tell her to come so we could leave.”
“Mr. Barnes, I have to admit your attitude towards this is very concerning and I fear I cannot risk the peace of our littles who confide in us to find them safe partners! Like I said she's one of the gentlest and I need to know you're going to treat her right before I even let you meet her!” The woman voiced her concerns and Bucky sighed.
He couldn't blow this now. He's come far enough with this whole process and if he went back to his therapist like that she was definitely going to get out her dreadful notebook.
He had to take this girl home tonight or else they would make him go through this same process over and over again.
“I'm sorry. I'm just a little confused, I guess.” Bucky scratched his beard.
“That's okay.” She smiled again, “most of our visitors are, but you can always ask.”
“Well— what is wrong with them?!” He exclaimed, gesturing with his hands in the air.
Sam kicked him again and glared.
“What? She said I could ask!”
“It's okay,” she told Sam with a chuckle.
“Nothing is wrong with them. Them regressing in age is their way to cope and relieve anxiety or deal with other mental illnesses such as traumatic experiences, or even just stress. It's a freer, calmer state of mind for them to return to when it's no longer easy for them to be big.”
Her calm, kind manner while explaining this made Bucky even angrier inside. This wasn’t normal and they should all stop acting like it was.
“So they're supposed to be helping me with my issues but they're dealing with their own issues?”
Like he originally thought, this was stupid.
“Yes, it's a mutual helping program.” The lady confirmed.
“Oh. And what's this Doll's issue?”
“Doll reverts to age regression as a coping mechanism for her depression and PTSD. She's been doing great lately actually!”
“Is she suddenly gonna go grownup or?” Bucky continued, involuntarily asking every question on his mind.
“No, like I said, Doll reverts to little space for the comfort and safety of it and while she can coax herself out of her headspace, she rarely ever chooses to.”
“But she can?”
“Yes. But I need to tell you, Mr. Barnes, that this is not why you're here.” She reminded, wanting to ensure the safety of self expression for the little one.
“I know.”
“I also need you to promise me to be a good caregiver for her. She's a sweet girl and I can guarantee she will be good for you.”
“I promise.” Bucky knew he was lying but he couldn’t care less about his honesty at the moment.
“And it’s never acceptable to make fun of her or try to force her into a more grownup headspace. That only makes it worse and her mind regresses further.”
“So what she becomes younger?!” He was trying so hard not to get frustrated, why make him!
“That's correct.” She nodded.
“How young?” Sam asked.
“The youngest she's ever been is 4.”
“Oh.” Great. Just great.
“She can still talk just fine,” she reassured them, knowing Bucky didn't want anyone who couldn't talk or seemed 'retarded'.
“Okay, good.” Bucky nodded, wanting to get out of the place as soon as possible.
“Would you like to meet Doll now or do you wanna take a look at the rest of the files?”
“I'll meet her.” Bucky stood up, hand already at the doorknob.
~
The meeting thing went relatively well and Bucky was surprised the girl wasn't intimidated by his frown or intense stare. She was mesmerized by the metal arm even.
He wasn't going to lie to himself, he still thought this whole thing was dumb but he needed to convince his therapist and everyone that he was okay again so they'd leave him alone.
She didn’t ask him any questions or have any conditions. She just stared at him with wide, sparkly eyes.
A minute later he heard the girl whisper her agreement to the short lady.
Apparently, she was big enough to make the decision to leave with a strange man she didn't know but not enough to properly dress herself or sleep without a damn toy.
Bucky was relieved anyway; glad she was idiotic enough to choose him so he wouldn't have to meet with any other 'littles'. And she wasn't ugly to look at either.
The old lady had a word with her privately before she was packing a bag and they were on their way to Bucky’s place.
~
“Where do I stay, daddy?”
Bucky hasn’t said a word to her since they’d left the institution. He made her carry her bag from the car to the elevator and from the elevator inside the apartment. He wasn’t going to be nobody’s maid.
She was physically capable and that didn’t need a professional to see it.
“I don’t know, figure it out.” Bucky shrugged, kicking his shoes off by the door and stepping inside.
She followed his lead and neatly placed her shoes at the corner by the door as well.
“Where do you want me to stay, daddy?” she asked politely, wanting to make him comfortable, seeing he was the owner of the house.
He was making her a little nervous.
This wasn’t his energy back at the institution and she tried her best not to get scared.
“I don't want you. I never did,” Bucky told her the minute she sat on his couch, throwing his keys on the wooden coffee table, “We're just gonna pretend your presence here is changing something and then I'm gonna return you.”
I don't want you.
She's definitely heard that before.
Return her. Like she was some sort of item. She wasn't what he wanted and it cracked her trained-to-love heart.
“Yes, daddy,” she replied brokenly, tears threatening to spill over the rims of her eyes.
Nothing was worse than feeling unwanted.
“Don't call me that.” Bucky snapped.
“B— But you're my daddy.” She was seriously confused now. Why would he pick her if he didn’t want this?
“I'm not your anything and stop acting so small, you look grown up enough to me.”
Why did he take her home if he didn’t like her and didn’t want to be her Daddy?
“I'm not acting.” Tears rolled down her cheeks and she felt more insecure than ever.
“Yeah, yeah, you're age regressed. Whatever, just don't call me that. I'm no one's daddy.” Bucky took his shirt off throwing it on the couch beside her, making her flinch.
“But what should I call you if not—”
“Call me Mr. Barnes, if you're so keen on being polite.” Bucky rolled his eyes.
“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She sniffled.
“And stop crying.” He huffed.
“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She quickly wiped at her face, holding the rest of her tears inside and forcing the lump in her throat further down.
Bucky muttered something under his breath before snatching his shirt and leaving to the bathroom, slamming the door behind him as she flinched again.
He didn't say she was a good girl for calling him what he wanted, or for stopping her crying when she was told to. He didn't like her and he wanted to return her.
What was she supposed to do until he sent her back? He didn't want her help even if they said he needed it.
Was it going to be like this for the next 3 months? How was she going to do all of the grown up stuff if Daddy Mr. Barnes didn't help her? How was she going to live? And why did she still care to try her best to be good for the harsh, blue-eyed man?
~
She didn’t know what to do so she sloppily changed her clothes by herself, putting her socks in the hamper to be washed like a good girl.
She washed her hands and feet by herself, unknowingly making Bucky think he was right all along about letting her do things on her own as she should.
That was until he put a hot cup of instant noodles before her for dinner though. He refused to help her eat and she accidentally spilled hot soup over her hand and the wooden table. It was chaos.
Bucky cursed out loud and she started crying in pain.
He had enough pity on her to drag her to the bathroom and put her hand under the cold water. If his hold on her arm hurt, she didn’t say anything.
“Keep it there, don’t you dare move.”
“Mr. Barnes, don’t leave,” she sniffled, eyes red and in pain.
“I’m not leaving you in the Sahara desert.” Bucky rolled his eyes, “I gotta go clean the mess you made.” He left her in the bathroom and she kept her hand under the water, not daring to move like she was told.
“How hard is it to eat fucking noodles! It’s not quantum physics!” Bucky muttered angrily as he wiped the soup off the table with a cloth.
“Fuck that age regression shit I am done!” He took their noodle cups to the kitchen and dumped both in the bin.
“What are you still doing in there! It’s not like you got burnt by lava!” Bucky shouted to her, walking to the bathroom.
“I— I— Mr. Barnes, you told me not to move.” She began crying again at his angry demeanor.
“For fuck’s sake,” Bucky groaned, “do you ever stop crying?!”
“I’m s-sorry.” She hiccupped. She didn’t know what to say or how to please him she just wanted him to stop glaring at her. She was scared.
“Get out of there and dry your hands,” Bucky told her, sitting on the couch with a sigh.
“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” Came her chocked whisper.
“Does it hurt?” Bucky asked when she came out of the bathroom, tears drying on her cheeks.
The question surprised her. Maybe he did care after all.
“Burns a little,” she told him, pointing to the back of her hand where the skin got burnt.
“I might have a cream here somewhere,” he said, trying his best to keep an unconcerned expression on.
She took a look around when Bucky stood up to look in the kitchen. It was a cozy place and she wasn’t too needy but she couldn’t help but wonder about where she was going to sleep.
There didn’t seem to be enough furniture in here.
“Try not to touch it and you should be fine in the morning,” Bucky instructed after applying the burns cream to the sensitive area of skin.
“Thank you, Mr. Barnes.” She whispered before absentmindedly pecking Bucky’s cheek.
Bucky’s eyes widened at her guts. He certainly didn’t see that coming. It was her first night here how was she so bold!
His breath stuttered out of his lungs but he quickly recomposed himself.
Bucky’s jaw clenched and he gave her a dark stare.
“Do you have a death wish?”
“N— No.” She quickly shook her head.
“Did I give you permission to do that?”
“No.” She shook her head again, sort of knowing where this was going. She was going to get punished.
“Then why’d you do it?” Bucky sneered through his teeth.
“To th— thank Mr. Barnes.” He made her so nervous she could barely hear herself answer him.
Bucky hated her. She had no sense of boundaries. He hated the way she cried all the time. He hated the way she referred to him in third person.
He hated her.
“You already said that, didn’t you?”
She nodded.
“Don’t do it again.” Was all Bucky said and she was relieved.
“Yes, Mr. Barnes.”
Bucky scoffed and stood up to put the cream back where he found it.
~
Turned out, Bucky had no bed. He slept on the floor and he didn’t need one.
“But where do I sleep, Mr. Barnes?” She asked in a small voice.
“Anywhere that is not next to me,” Bucky replied, not even sparing her a glance.
“Can I sleep here?” she asked, patting the couch.
“Suit yourself.”
“Thank you, Mr. Barnes.” She gave a shy smile.
“I didn’t make the damn couch. Just go to sleep.”
“Bad word again,” she whispered.
“What was that?” Bucky raised an eyebrow.
“Nothing.” She slammed a hand on her mouth.
“Repeat what you just said if you know what’s good for you.” Bucky glared.
“I— Mr. Barnes said a bad word,” she whispered shakily.
“Yeah, well, it’s my house! I’ll talk however I want!” Bucky raised his voice.
“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She nodded, not even thinking about arguing that he shouldn’t curse in front of a little.
“Go to sleep.”
“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She quickly plopped on the couch, covering herself with a blanket, and burying her face in a cushion.
Bucky almost chuckled; almost thought it was cute but he shook the smile off his face quickly and sighed, taking his shirt off and getting himself on the hard floor, easily falling asleep.
He always falls asleep so fast because nightmares usually wake him up few hours after; he be waiting for bed time all day.
She peeked from under the blanket when she heard Bucky snore, carefully tiptoeing to her bag to get her stuffie. She took one look at shirtless Bucky, her cheeks heating up, before sliding back under the covers on the couch.
Her Daddy that didn’t like to be called Daddy was beautiful.
~
It has started again. He’s chasing a person, he corners them to where they could not run anymore, his left hand wraps around their throat, they struggle and beg and then snap. He kills them.
Bucky startled awake, having a hard time taking his breath only to find her on the floor next to him.
Her eyes were full of worry and maybe even sympathy as she clutched a stuffed animal. Bucky didn’t like it.
“It’s okay, Daddy— Mr. Barnes. ‘T was just a bad dream.” She whispered, dropping her stuffie to wrap her short arms around Bucky.
He wouldn’t admit it but it felt nice to be held. Something inside him wanted to succumb to the gentleness of her gesture. But Bucky shut that down at once.
“Get off,” Bucky huffed tiredly as the girl clung to him and rubbed his sweaty back.
“But—”
“Get. Off.” He repeated, grinding his teeth and she reluctantly slipped off his lap and went back to her spot on the floor.
She stared at him as he panted and frowned for a second before leaving the room.
Bucky scoffed, rubbing a hand down his hot face. She probably went to cry in the bathroom again; such a crybaby.
Except she didn’t.
She returned with a relatively cool glass of water, only half full. She didn't want to be bad and spill.
“I got you water, Mr. Barnes.” She carefully got on her knees and offered him the cup.
“Stop saying my name so much.” Bucky snatched the cup out of her hand, gulping down the water without showing an ounce of gratitude.
She pouted, crawling to her bag to get him tissues because she didn’t see any around.
“So you do know how to act around liquids after all.” Bucky taunted, still not over the fact that she spilled soup over his table before taking the tissues from her to wipe his forehead.
“Do you want me to sing you a lullaby, Mr. Barnes? It helps me after bad dreams.” She suggested, desperately hoping he would let her help.
“Not all of us act like kids to flee our nightmares.”
“Mr. Barnes.” Her eyes filled with tears and it was the last thing Bucky wanted to deal with, “I’m not acting.”
She was hurt but he didn’t care. He said what he said.
“Get back on the couch, I wanna go to sleep.” Bucky dismissed, pushing the empty glass against the wall.
“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” She whispered dejectedly, taking her friend and crawling back to the couch.
~
The same thing happened every night for another four nights. At this point she was really worried about the man she started singing lullabies anyway, not waiting for his permission.
“Hey, you!”
“Doll,” she corrected.
“Whatever! Shut up already. I told you I don’t need your stupid singing.” Bucky growled into his pillow.
He was lying. He hated admitting it but he was. Her voice was actually angelic. He never went back to sleep again after a nightmare but that changed when she ignored his wishes and started singing. Bucky could drift off again to her soft voice.
He could get more hours of nightmareless sleep because of her lullabies. But he was too stubborn to admit anything that came from her was working for him.
It must be a coincidence. He probably fell asleep again because he was exhausted from being mad at her all day.
“I know Mr. Barnes doesn’t need it. It’s for me.” She lied as well. She knew lying wasn’t good girl like but she was helping Mr. Barnes; it was for good reason.
~
“Mr. Barnes,” her small voice called to him but Bucky was ignoring her.
He was pretending he couldn’t hear her and continued staring at the TV because she talked too much for his liking.
“Mr. Barnes.” She ever so lightly touched Bucky’s arm.
“What!” he spit suddenly, making her jump.
“We— We need to go shopping. Mrs. Morrison will visit tomorrow.”
She knew the process and for some reason didn’t want to be taken away from Bucky.
If Mrs. Morrison came and saw the way the apartment was or the way Bucky treated Doll, she was definitely going to make her leave with her.
“What?!”
“It’s day five.” She reminded, tilting her head to the side.
“Yeah, so?” Bucky’s body fully turned to face her.
“Tomorrow’s visit day. We have to go shopping.”
“How do I know you’re not lying just to get me to buy you things?”
“I don’t lie, Mr. Barnes.” She assured him, looking hurt at even the suggestion.
“It’s in the papers,” she told him, referring to the contract he’s signed as well as the guide he was provided with her file before leaving the institution.
Bucky narrowed his eyes at her, but stood up to look at the papers he’d carelessly shoved in a drawer in the kitchen a few days ago.
“Shit,” he muttered when he saw she wasn’t lying. He heard her whisper bad word but chose to ignore it.
There were scheduled visits listed with different time intervals between each visit for the next three months.
Bucky groaned, throwing the paper sheet back in the drawer and slamming it shut.
“Put your clothes on, we’re going fucking shopping.”
“Bad word.”
“Don’t even—” she ran to the bathroom to change before Bucky could get angrier.
What has Sam gotten him into?
~
“Why’s your hair so messy!” Bucky asked, shoving her out of his way to grab a jar of peanut butter and put in the cart.
“I don’t know how to do it on my own an’ Mr. Barnes kept telling me to hurry up.”
Her voice was so small and if Bucky wasn’t so infuriated by the situation he would’ve felt bad for how he spoke to her.
“You’d think you’d actually look decent enough after taking forever to get ready.” Bucky huffed.
She remained silent, looking down and closing in on herself.
“Do you eat this?” Bucky asked, waving a box of corn flakes in front of her.
“Yes, Mr. Barnes.”
Bucky nodded, throwing the box in the cart.
“Didn’t I tell you to stop saying my name so much?”
“I’m sorry, Mr. Barn—” Bucky’s cold stare stopped the word on her tongue.
“Call me Bucky.”
He didn’t want her to call him Bucky. But if that Mrs. Morrison was visiting tomorrow she couldn’t know he made her speak to him formally.
“Bucky?”
“Bucky.”
“Yes, Bucky.” She smiled shyly, feeling one step closer to the man.
Bucky didn’t know his life would turn upside down so fast.
He never cared about grocery shopping because he didn’t need that much stuff and he mostly ate at restaurants or diners or bought take out. He mainly just had beer filling his fridge.
But with her tied to him now he was buying all kinds of food: fresh vegetables and fruits, juice boxes, snack bars and way too many Oreos. Not to mention the toiletries he had to pay for because aside from her tooth and hair brushes, she came with nothing.
“Bucky, can we please get this?” she asked, pointing to a stuffed white wolf.
“No, you already have one at home. I see it every night.”
“Please, Bucky, please. Pretty please,” she begged, giving puppy eyes and pressing her palms together even.
“Okay, fine, shut up. God!” Bucky grumpily put the toy in the cart and got them to the nearest cashier before she could pick anything else.
She was so happy and was going to cherish her new stuffie more than ever.
~
Bucky was pacing back and forth in the living room. He needed to find a way to convince her not to tell Mrs. Morrison or whatever her name was how he treated her.
He didn’t want her to know she had any type of power over him because of the situation.
Bucky definitely wasn’t going to say please, but he also knew he couldn’t scare her into saying what he wanted.
“Bucky, please go to bed. Wolfie can’t sleep.” She whined, hugging her newest stuffie to her heart.
Bucky gave her yet another hard glare. She made him so angry that sometimes he forgot how to function. She was so spoiled and oblivious.
“I won’t say anything to Mrs. Morrison,” she whispered.
“You think I care what you have to say?! They could take you right now for all I care!” Bucky replied angrily.
“I know…” she mumbled, “I don’t want them to.”
Her words left Bucky without a reply. He was confused. She didn’t want to leave? Why not? Bucky hasn’t said one kind word to her since she’s been entrusted to him.
Was she some type of masochist?
“I wanna stay with Bucky. Sing him lullabies and eat noodles with him,” she said, her voice soft and heavy with sleep, before her eyes shut as she drifted off.
Her words put Bucky at ease for now and he got on the floor to finally try to get some sleep. He tried to ignore the way they affected him though.
~
“Bucky,” she called gently.
“Hmm.”
“I need to shower,” came her timid whisper.
“Do you see me using the bathroom?! Help yourself.” Bucky huffed, stirring the sugar in his mug.
“I can’t.”
“What do you mean you can’t?!” he snapped, throwing the spoon in the sink.
“I need Bucky’s help.” Her face was on fire with embarrassment of having to say this out loud.
“For fuck’s sake,” Bucky rolled his eyes, pushing his mug aside before grabbing her arm and pushing her to the bathroom.
She whimpered as they stood before the glass door of the shower.
“This, because you’re not stupid you’re just age regressed, opens the hot water.” Bucky pointed to the tap handle on the right. “This opens the cold water. And this—”
“Bucky, that’s not what I need help with.” She shook her head, biting down on her lip.
“What do you want from me then?!” Bucky had no patience and her bashfulness wasn’t helping.
She raised her arms up before whispering, “I need Bucky to gimme a shower.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Bad word.”
“Don’t start now! You don’t know how to shower?!”
She shook her head, pouting as her eyes got teary again, “not when little.”
“This is bullshit. I didn’t even wanna do this. Damn you, Sam Wilson!” Bucky said, walking out of the bathroom angrily as she trailed behind him like the lost puppy she was.
“Bad word.”
“Stop!” Bucky boomed and she put her hands behind her back timidly.
“Please, Bucky,” she begged, getting hold of his hand.
“No! On my dead body!”
~
“Stand straight or I swear I’m gonna leave you here and go!”
“Yes, Bucky,” she giggled, the water trickling down her spine tickling her.
“Now what?” He huffed, trying not to stare at her naked chest.
“Now, this.” She held up the bottle of conditioner for him and Bucky sighed before taking it and squeezing some on his hand.
He was about to smooth it down her scalp when she moved away.
“No, no! This goes on the ends or else it gives you dandruff,” She said and Bucky would’ve facepalmed so hard if it wasn’t for the slippery matter covering his palms.
This was going to be long.
~
She was fast asleep on Bucky’s couch after her shower, so peaceful and without a care in the world.
Bucky envied her as he got in place on the floor. He really wished he had enough flexibility in him to accept help and care from someone.
But no, he didn't need her. He didn't need any of this. He just had to go through tomorrow and the rest will figure itself out.
Yeah, yeah just tomorrow for now, Bucky thought as he drifted off.
part II
~
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libraryofgage · 10 months
Text
Addams Family B-Side (1)
Part of: Steve Deserves Good Parents, Actually Debbie and Fester Addams One (you're here!) Rick and Evelyn O'Connell (on the way!)
This is part of a series of unrelated works entitled "Steve Deserves Good Parents, Actually" and I think that title is fairly self-explanatory. If there are any other couples you think would be good parents for our Stevie boy, let me know and I'll take them into consideration!
Anyway, the B-Side thing is because this is like taking my Addams Family Steddie au and just flipping the cassette tape hfjsdk
This time, it's Steve that's the Addams and Eddie that's normal!
Anyway, blame @whatthemeepever for this one specifically cuz it's gonna spiral into a wild ride actually, so let's all pray for Eddie in advance
If you'd like a tag for any future parts, let me know!
And, as always, if you see any typos, no you didn't
-------
The moment Steve is born, his father sticks a light bulb in his mouth. When it glows, he jumps with joy and throws Steve into the air. The moment Steve's mother realizes what's happening, she slaps his father upside the head, throws the light bulb at him, and threatens to blow him up again if he sticks anymore into Steve's mouth before he starts teething.
She follows through on the promise exactly two weeks later, and Steve's parents (one smug and the other notably singed but delighted) rebuild their house next door to his father's brother.
Steve's mother chooses his first and last name (Harrington, a reference to some long-lost family friend or other), and his father is reluctantly given the freedom to choose his middle name. In the end, he is dubbed Steve Faustus Harrington, a name his mother is so surprised to find acceptable that she kisses his father as a reward.
And so begins Steve's life.
------
"I can't believe you got expelled," Steve's mother seethes, gripping the steering wheel so tight her knuckles turn white. "Again!"
Steve crosses his arms, sinking lower in his seat as he glares out the window. "It's not my fault they were shitty friends. They got what they deserved."
He hears his mother laugh, the sound strained and indignant and very quickly followed by his father turning to look at Steve from the passenger seat. His sunken eyes are filled with suppressed delight as he asks, "What did they do this time?"
A few seconds pass before Steve sighs. "They said they couldn't go out later because they had to study for finals. I mean, what kind of bullshit is that? Finals are three weeks away, and they can't spare one weekend for the funeral museum?" he says, scoffing as he looks at his father, grins, and adds, "So, I brought the funeral museum to them, coffins and cremations and all."
His father's eyes light up, sheer joy and pride dancing in them. And for the very first time in Steve's life, his mother pulls over to the side of the road and parks the car.
"Pumpkin?" his father asks.
"Fester," she says, her voice low and somewhere in the range of upset, "do you remember when I tried to kill your entire family?"
"Of course. It was a splendid attempt."
She nods and looks at him with a tiny, somewhat pained smile. Then she turns and sets her gaze on Steve. "Darling, what kind of grades do your friends have?" she asks. "Because if you're anything like me, and I know you are, you tend to befriend people who are significantly dumber than you."
Steve blinks, thinking for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, most of them were about to fail," he admits.
"Then, isn't it possible they really were studying for finals? Especially if they were close to failing at a school where passing is a requirement of attendance? Perhaps you could have suggested going to the...funeral museum after finals?"
A few seconds pass as Steve considers her words, a crushing sense of realization and guilt dropping on his shoulders and traveling to the pit of his stomach. It makes him feel nauseous, and he stares down at his lap. "I fucked up," he finally says, voice quiet and apologetic.
"Of course not!" Fester says, reaching out and ruffling Steve's hair despite the affronted noise from Debbie, "Your plan was beautifully conceived and masterfully executed. Perhaps you should just talk a little more before pulling out the urns next time."
"Incredibly, your father is right," Debbie says, looking pleasantly surprised before turning her gaze to Steve. She sighs and holds out a hand, squeezing Steve's when he takes it. "Don't get so blinded by a beautiful pair of shoes that you completely miss the sale two aisles over, Steve. At the very least, do a little more research before resorting to torture and murder. Personally, I'm very tired of calling the family's lawyer."
Steve snorts at the utter lie. Debbie loves calling the family's lawyer. She does so regularly just to double-check the state of Fester's stocks and bonds and deeds and general worth. "Okay," he says, nodding once, "I'll remember for the next school."
"You know," Fester says, looking at Debbie hopefully, "Pubert is a senior this year. Maybe Steve could go to high school with him."
Debbie hesitates, frowning slightly before saying, "Yes, but it's...public school."
"The best Gomez and Morticia could find! It was highly recommended by Margaret, and Pubert can make sure Steve adjusts and makes friends."
Steve can see the moment his mother agrees. She sighs, lets go of his hand, and fixes her already perfect bob. "Well, I suppose," she says before looking at Steve once more. "And you, Steve? Would you like to try...public school for your junior year?"
"Sure, might be fun," Steve says, thinking about all the movies he's seen that display public high schools as a zoo and the worst place on Earth. It sounds great, and if the place is still standing while Pubert attends, it must be somewhat entertaining.
------
"You've got everything you'll need?"
Steve looks up from lacing his shoes and smiles at his mother, earning a nervous grin in return. Her blonde hair is uncharacteristically frazzled, and Steve feels warm and fuzzy (like a mold growing over his heart) at knowing she's so worried as to appear less-than-perfect in front of him.
"Yes, I've got everything," he says, gesturing to the backpack on the stairs next to him. In addition to notebooks and his pencil case, Steve has also packed a travel mace, a miniature bomb (alarm clock detonator stored separately, of course), a tiny bottle of tequila, and his lucky lightbulb (just in case).
His mother nods once, takes a deep breath, and then turns her head toward the kitchen to shout, "FESTER!"
Something crashes, a cat (they don't have a cat) yowls, and Steve's father slides into the doorway. "Yes, Pumpkin?" he asks, eyes bright and happy and utterly stuck on Debbie.
"Is Steve's lunch ready? You made something normal, right?" she asks, one eyebrow raised.
Fester glances at Steve, a brief look shared between them that's both sympathetic and endeared toward Debbie. "Of course," Fester says, disappearing for two seconds before striding over to the stairs with a pink lunch box decorated with black skulls (Steve chose the color, Fester chose the pattern, and Debbie gave them her stamp of approval). "A turkey sandwich, fruit, cookies, and juice."
"Fruit?" Debbie asks, her eyes narrowed slightly.
"Apple slices!"
After a few seconds, Debbie nods, and Fester gives the lunch box to Steve, shifting some so Debbie doesn't see the conspiratorial wink that tells him the juice is definitely poisoned. Steve grins and shoves the lunch box into his bag. He finishes lacing his shoes and stands, holding his arms out so his mother can inspect him.
"You've done a wonderful job pairing your shirt and shoes," Debbie says, walking around Steve with an air of pride and approval. She rubs the sleeve of his pastel yellow sweater between her thumb and forefinger, nodding once. "The plum pants are a bold choice, but it pays off. And, as always, your hair is flawless, dear."
Steve grins, letting his arms fall to his side. "I tried that new mousse you gave me," he says, fingers twitching as he fights the urge to run them through his hair. "It works great."
His mother smiles even wider and kisses his cheek, pulling out a handkerchief and carefully wiping away the lipstick residue she leaves behind. "I knew it would," she says, inspecting Steve's face once more before nodding with approval.
"Pumpkin, it's time for Steve to go. Pubert is waiting."
Debbie huffs softly and gives Steve one last once over before nodding and hurrying him toward the door. "Have a good day at school, try not to blow anything up, and call me if Pubert tries to cut off your head with a rusty knife again," she says.
"What if it's a clean knife?"
"Well, that's fine. Grandmama will just sew it back on."
Steve grins and waves to both of his parents before hurrying toward the sidewalk where Pubert is waiting. His hair is parted down the middle and gelled down, his pencil-thin mustache is immaculate as ever, and he's wearing a three-piece suit. When Steve is closer, he pulls out two cigars and offers one.
"This isn't an exploding cigar again, right? I'm wearing a new shirt," Steve says, taking it and looking it over.
"Nah, that joke only works once," Pubert says, dragging a match against his palm to light it. He holds it to his cigar first, puffs a few times, and then does the same for Steve. "How long till you get expelled again, you think?"
Steve shrugs as he takes a puff from the cigar, letting the smoke linger for a moment before skillfully blowing it out in perfect circles as they walk. "I haven't been to a public school before," he says, tapping the cigar over the sidewalk, "so, hopefully, at least a year."
"Public school is fun," Pubert says, getting a wicked grin as he looks at Steve. "You can get away with a lot."
"And the other kids?"
"Well, they've certainly got a lot to learn. I mean, most of them can't even handle a little cyanide."
Steve scrunches his nose and takes another puff of his cigar. After a few seconds he asks, "Will we have any classes together?"
"You're a year below me, so maybe an elective or two. What did you sign up for?"
"I signed up for, uh, shop class, forensic science, and Gothic literature."
"We'll have Gothic lit together," Pubert says, flashing a smile before asking, "And you know what shop class is, right?"
Steve blinks, suddenly a little hesitant. "Is it not, like, something about shopping?"
"No. It's building things. With wood, usually."
"Oh! So, I can build anything?"
"I guess. I haven't taken it."
"Well, I'll find out. Maybe I can build Dad a catapult or guillotine or something."
As they get closer to the school, more students fill the sidewalks, but Steve notices that most of them seem to give him and Pubert a wide berth. They also stare, looking at Steve like he's some kind of puzzle to be solved, with more than a few flashing sympathetic smiles like he's trapped and can't get away. "You're popular," Steve notes, taking one last puff of his cigar before dropping it into a trash can.
"I would fucking hope so," Pubert says, finishing off his cigar and tossing it into the next trash can they pass. "I didn't flood the place with roaches and vermin to not be known."
Steve grins, listening as Pubert regales him with the tale only to cut it short when they get inside the school and pass the front office. "I need to get my schedule, but Mom said she made sure we'd have lunch together," Steve says.
Pubert waves him off. "Yeah, I'll meet you in the cafeteria. Have fun, cousin," he replies, mockingly saluting him before heading off down the main hall.
-----
Steve's first class of the day was AP Calculus, followed by AP Physics, Wood Shop, and AP U.S. History. When it's finally time for lunch, he surveys the cafeteria for a few seconds before finding a table in a dark corner that everyone seems to avoid. By the time he gets there, Pubert has sat down with a tray from the lunch line.
Steve sets his backpack on the table, sits down, and says, "For a place that's so lifeless, it's not even fun."
"Yeah, it's like that," Pubert agrees, poking some unidentifiable mush on his tray with a spork before spooning some into his mouth.
It's with a somewhat jealous expression that Steve pulls out his lunch box and removes a thermos of poisoned juice. "Is it bad?" he asks, nodding to the tray.
"Utterly repulsive."
Steve sighs and takes a sip from the thermos before pulling out everything else in his lunch box. "They made me wear safety goggles in shop. Safety goggles! It's like they don't know how fun splinters in the eyes are. And everyone is soooo scared of the saws, it's ridiculous," he complains, taking an angry bite of his sandwich.
"What about your other classes?"
"Physics would be better with more practical examples. I mean, who cares about apples when we could learn if a body falls faster than a cannonball?"
"From experience, no," Pubert says, "Anyway, you gonna join any clubs?"
"Maybe the swim team? If I'm lucky, I'll drown," Steve says, perking up a little at the thought.
"Best of luck with that," Pubert replies, stealing Steve's thermos to take a sip of his juice. When he places it back, he offers Steve a sporkful of the mush.
Steve lights up and happily tries it, wondering how something can be so perfectly undercooked and overcooked at the same time. "Impressive," he says, passing the spork back. "Is that freezer burn?"
Before Pubert can answer, a bang from the other side of the cafeteria cuts off all other sounds. Steve glances over to see a boy in heavy combat boots climbing onto his table with a mischievous grin. He's wearing a shirt with a devil head on it and "Hellfire Club" emblazoned above and a vest with spikes, pins, and patches. His hair is just below his shoulders and a little curly, and Steve can see from here the wild glint in his eyes as he stomps down the table while talking.
"I'm tired of the double standards of this lame school. If you're into science or band or some other 'uncool' interest, the administration couldn't give two shits! Oh, the choir room needs new risers so the current ones don't break any necks? Well, that's too bad, we've got to give the football team new monogrammed towels for the locker room!" the guy says, grinning when a group of kids to the side shouts their agreement. "And never mind that our Robotics team has won the school three trophies when the basketball team so valiantly scraped into third place last year for being kinda good at throwing balls into laundry baskets."
"Prick!"
Steve glances at the guy who shouted, taking in his letterman jacket before quickly dismissing him. He looks back in time to see the boy on the table sticking out his tongue and holding his hands to his temples to make horns. There's an even wilder look in his eyes now, a sheer glee at causing a scene and getting under someone's skin.
Steve doesn't realize he's smiling until the boy scoffs, shouts one more line about the school's unfair preference for "mediocre jocks," and hops off the table. He looks over at Pubert and asks, "Who was that?"
Pubert glances at Steve, studying him for a moment before swallowing another mouthful of mush and saying, "Eddie Munson. He does that once a week, usually."
"Eddie Munson," Steve murmurs, glancing over at Eddie's table again and smiling a little wider.
957 notes · View notes
reachartwork · 2 months
Text
the process
a lot of people like to ask me about my process and how ai can be "creative" because they're under the impression that it's just kind of a big slot machine. you pull a lever and art uncontrollably comes out. well, let me show you my process
this is going to be a long thread tagged with #long post, blacklist that if you want to skip it.
so how it starts like most art is that i have an idea. in this case, earlier i made a post about witch-knights "surfing" on swords, so i'm going to try and make that - a witch-knight flying through the air atop one of her swords.
it starts with this picture.
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i think this picture is dogshit so i discard basically all of it to try and find something closer to my original intent. there's a couple of uninteresting regenerations so it's clear i have to go back to the drawing board and teach the machine what it is i'm trying to do
let's start with a witch-knight on a broom. it's definitely not great but it gives us a better pose that i can work with.
i start by erasing the broom and replacing it with a skateboard - the machine understands skating better for what i need it to do.
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there's a ton of small, subtle errors in this image and it overall looks like dogshit but the most important part right now is blocking and the overall pose structure - i need her "surfing" a large, lengthwise object, in the sky. i start by erasing pieces of the skateboard
now we have a sword, which is good. but the sword itself looks... bad. i'll spare you the abortive attempts at selective regeneration of the sword and just show you what happened when i rolled it back a couple of times from this pose and let it regen entirely.
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again, tons of small little shitty errors, but this is something i can work with. i do another regen for a less shitty sword. her boob armor gets replaced with, like, generic scale mail.
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this image has a great sword and decent pose but like... everything else is kind of futzy and i dont like it. instead of trying to pick and choose i just throw it back into the oven for a second. much better! but now she's going to cut herself on the sword, oh no!
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again, i'll save you the agonizing thirty minutes of trying to get it to understand where the foot should go. unlike before i didn't really have a choice except to muscle through. there! now she's surfing safely :)
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so it's done, right? well, i mean, i could post this. and it would probably do okay. but *i'm* not satisfied with it. there's stiffness. dozens of minor errors. the eyes look weird when you zoom in. let's start by fixing her hat, and then maybe her hands?
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but she's missing fingers on her left hand so let's go ahead and fix that too. and i don't really like the tip of her sword and the ocean looks really flat and boring. so, VERY CAREFULLY, i have to etch out the parts of the sword and her body i have to keep, and also write an entirely new prompt to tell it "i want an ocean w/ rolling waves please :)"
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this is better but not great. i try again - serendipitously, it makes this really cool variant with a shadow over the water, but i know working with that will take more wrangling so i'm considering it an evolutionary dead end and discarding it for now.
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i proceed to spend 30 minutes trying to make the ocean look better but it's really not working imo. i'm gonna go back to the shadow version and see how that works
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i'll spare you the other 8 minutes - i'm satisfied with the following picture. the sword isn't *perfectly* straight, her eyes aren't perfectly textured, the scale mail is... weird, in texture, but anything else would be greasing the wheel and i think beyond the machine's ability to do fine detail.
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i've also attached the starting picture for comparison - it has better, "higher quality" clouds and ocean but i personally cared more about the pose and the sword surfing - the background is mostly tangential. could i get back ocean and clouds of that quality with another two hours of painstakingly cutting and re-generating bits of the background without destroying any of my existing work on the pose? probably. but i don't want to.
total time spent on this piece from start to finish was one hour and twenty one minutes. and now you know!
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reidsweetener · 1 year
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spencer and his bau!secret wife having a misunderstanding🥹
he still presses his lips to yours in greeting, a smile only reserved for you present on his face; yet it didn't quite reach his eyes.
you notice the changes to his demeanor; shifts you couldn't possibly ignore. you've shared a bed with him for five years, to be estranged with his emotions, and your heart drops. there was the ever present distance both of you choose to ignore, but the elephant in the room needs to be adressed.
you finish your night time routine, and shut off the bathroom light. quietly, you pad towards the bed, and you notice that he was facing the other side, barely acknowledging your presence. you slip under the covers, staring up at the ceiling— before you break.
tears pooling at the corners of your eye, you tried to contain the sniffle that followed. there was an overwhelming burst of emotions that gave you the false courage to finally ask. “spence?” you call.
immediately, he turns towards you, momentarily surprise at your tears and the forlon look you had. then he turned solemn, “what's wrong babe?” his voice wavers, throat welling up with emotions.
this was it, you both thought.
“do you not.. do you not love me anymore?” you whisper, looking at him with red rimmed eyes. the alienation, the silent treatment, the way you slowly drift away from each other day by day. you couldn't understand why, and there was that— that.. lipstick you saw on his collar from the other day, it was a smudge, but it was there.
he is cheating on you.
“what?” spencer stutters, “do you not love me anymore?” he asks, brow furrowing in confusion.
“don't ask me that, you're the one who's been distant.” you quip, lower lip wobbling.
“i thought.. you flinch when i try to be affectionate with you.” he was evidently hurt, “babe, you could barely look at me for too long.”
your sniffles halt, and so does his tears. “what do you mean? we barely even talk spence... we no longer sit down to have proper conversations. you've started taking the other car for work, aren't you—” pursing your lips, you breathe out shakily. “cheating on me?”
“oh, oh.. oh! i would never cheat on you! i love you, darling!” spencer adamantly denies. “fuck, i thought you were leaving me.. i thought you didn't like me anymore, that's why i tried to minimize my presence..” his arms snake around your waist, and you lean into his touch, shaking your head rapidly.
“i wouldn't. not ever.. b-but why are there lipstick stains on your collar?”
he tries to recall an incident where his collar may have been stained, and his eyes brightened. “emily! she was swatching lip colors with garcia, for a gift— and she fixed my skewed collar and tie. please, you can even ask her and garcia.” he swears, anxiety dwindling.
your mouth was agape, “so.. this is all just a big misunderstanding?”
“i'm afraid so.” he murmurs, sighing as if a heavy weight was lifted off his chest. “oh, i missed you so.” spencer cradles you, and your arms snaked around him, nuzzling your face in his chest.
“me too, honey.” you sniffle.
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arc-misadventures · 20 days
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Jaune mfk vampire ruby werewolf yang , ice queen Weiss
Jaune: MFK XIV
Nora: Jaune, MFK!
Jaune: Will it ever end?!
Nora: NEVER!
Nora: Ahem...
Nora: MFK kill, a vampire, a werewolf, and a ice queen!
Jaune: D-Didn't I already do those parings?
Nora: Ehh... mostly... However! This time instead of you getting to choose which lady in your life is which monster! I have already chosen which lady is which monster!
Jaune: And, do you think this will impact my answer?
Nora: Maybe?
Jaune: Fair. Okay, who did you pick for what?
Nora: For our sweet little vampire we have, Ruby Rose!
Ruby: H-Hi...
Jaune: Hi, Rubes.
Nora: As our werewolf we have the sexy blond bombshell, Yang Xiao Long!
Yang: Hey, there handsome. Have you got a bone for me to chew on~?
Jaune: Are you wearing a fur bikini...? And, is that a tail?!
Nora: And, last but not least, as the ice queen, Weiss Schnee!
Weiss: Hello, Jaune.
Jaune: Little on the nose for, Weiss of all people to be the ice monster.
Nora: Shut up!
Nora: Now then... who will you choose for what~?
Jaune: Haaa... Kill, Weiss.
Weiss: Ahh?! Why?
Jaune: I'm mostly going about this based on your costumes, and honestly, I would assume that your costume is just a spare outfit you keep in your closet when your normal outfit gets a stain on it.
Weiss: ...
Weiss: It is...
Jaune: Oh gods...
Weiss: B-But, what about, Ruby! She already dressed like a gothic lolita! Is she now a vampire because she's wearing a vail, and false fangs?!
Jaune: Are you?
Ruby: Awww~!
Jaune: ...
Jaune: Marry vampire, Ruby!
Weiss: What?!
Ruby: Yay~!
Nora: And, why is that?
Jaune: While unlike, Weiss who looked like she decided to go wear plaid shirt instead of dress shirt...
Coco: HA! Nice~!
Jaune: Ruby looks like she actually is, a gothic lolita vampire. Her fashion style, and face, all scream cute little vampire.
Coco: I agree!
Weiss: Shut up, Coco!
Coco: Make me, bitch!
Nora: Is that all?
Jaune: About those fake teeth...
Ruby: What about them?
Jaune: What that mouth do?
Ruby: EEP?!
Yang: HA! Nice.
Nora: So does that mean...?
Jaune: I'd fuck werewolf Yang.
Yang: Fuck yeah!
Nora: And, why is that?
Jaune: The fur bikini for starters... Didn't know I'd find that hot. But, you'll never know until you get an erection.
Yang: Wait... does that mean~?
Jaune: And, that tail... I have many questions... And, I want answers.
Yang: Alright then~! Let's get some answers~! Come here handsome!
Jaune: Shall I take notes?
Yang: Yes~! Come on, Ruby!
Ruby: Y-You want me to join you...?
Yang: Jaune's not the only one who wants to know what that mouth do~! So come on!
Ruby: Coming~!
Weiss: ...?!
Nora: ...
Coco: A threesome with sisters?
Coco: Respect~!
Weiss: Why are you here?
Coco: Fashion~!
Nora: Nice.
Weiss: What...?
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princessmaybank · 7 months
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Truth or Dare
Pairings: BestFriend!JJ x BestFriend!Fem!Reader
Warnings: Jealous JJ, stripping, fingering, squirting, etc.
Summary: They play t or d.
Authors Note: I didn't mean to post this so soon, but since it's out already I hope you like it, I'm just stopping it here, if you like it let me know if you want a part 2 :(.
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"Truth or Dare?" John B asks darting his eyes to Cleo. "Oh come on man! You should already know the answer!" He smirked and nodded. You were at the chateau in the hot tub that JJ so graciously purchased for you all a few months back. Everyone was slugging down beers and having a big night of fun.
"I dare you to read the last text message you sent out loud." JB said shrugging, showing us that's all he has prepared. "oh man, too easy!" Cleo flung her arms upwards then reached for her phone. After she got to her messages she cleared her throat. " 'What we gonna do tonight?' I sent that to Sarah man." John B rolled his eyes in defeat, secretly hoping she had sent a naughty message to Pope or something.
"Okay Y/N, truth or dare?" She moved on quickly. "Dare of course." You responded, causing JJ to look at you with a slight smile. You and JJ are best friends, and always have been. Of course everyone in that hot tub was your best friend, but JJ was different, you could talk about literally anything for hours on end. He's always been there for you.
"I dare you to prank call Rafe Cameron. Pretend to want him and need him." Cleo ended with a smirk pointing to your phone. You didn't mind the dare but a certain blonde about a foot behind you definitely cared. He wasn't good at hiding his emotions, everything he wanted to say was already written on his face. "I don't think that's a good idea Y/N." You hear JJ say with a stern voice from behind you. "Oh calm your tits Jayj, what's the worst that could happen? I get a boyfriend?" You responded making all the girls giggle.
"It's ringing!" Kiara said out loud so everyone knew what was going on. Kiara was very close to the phone with you but it was pressed against your ear. "Hey Rafe!" You said a little too enthusiastic for JJ's liking. "Hey, Y/N. What do I owe this pleasant surprise?" He asked, gratefully. "Well I really wanted to tell you that I think of you a lot Rafe. It's getting to be too much now. I can't shake the feeling of needing to be with you." Everyone was giggling at that moment, other than one person, I'm sure you could guess who. Your eyes caught JJ's as he rolled them and crossed his arms. You could see how this was affecting him, so why not play some more. "Wow, I've been wai-" You cut Rafe's sentence short. "Rafe, mmmmm I need you so bad right now. Ohhhh." You pretend to moan into the phone. "Oh baby, are you touching yourself to me?" He asked clearly turned on. Kiara gagged and walked a few feet away. "Oh yes I am, but I wish it was you..." You paused for dramatic effect.
"Daddy." You smirked holding back a giggle, hearing Rafe groan into the phone. Next thing you know JJ is standing in front of you hanging up the call, fuming. He was legitimately tomato red. Everyone watched, curious about what he was going to do.
He grabbed your waist pulling you as close as he could while looking into your eyes. "Don't you ever pull that shit again." His eyes never left yours. You wanted to stand up for yourself but the only thing that left your mouth was "o-okay." He leaned down to whisper in your ear. "Good girl." There was that feeling of butterflies in your stomach. JJ never made you feel this way. What was happening? "When this little party is over you're coming to my room, we have things to talk about." He whispered again.
Everyone sat back down choosing to ignore how JJ nearly killed/fucked you right then and there. You chose to ignore it as well even though the tingling between your legs is making it difficult.
Instead of you asking the next question Pope cut the tension and began after Sarah. "Truth or dare?" He asked. Sarah obviously chose the safe route at this moment. "Is it true that even though you and JB are married, you'll still have a huge wedding and legally do it?" Pope asked. Awe of course he would, it's Pope. Sarah nodded "Of course I still want my dream wedding! Don't be silly Pope." She giggled.
"Okay J- Kiara, yeah Kiara. Truth or dare?" No one could look at JJ right now how would they be able to play this game right now?
"I'll say, truth." She smiled lightly. "Ok here's a little would you rather. Would you rather, fuck Topper or Kelce?" Kiara gasped. "Ew, can I kill myself instead?" She gagged. Everyone laughed and accepted that as her answer.
Eventually someone asked JJ the question and he ended up chugging some beer upside down. You still couldn't get those low-flying butterflies to go away. The thought of JJ taking you right there was fogging your brain.
After about an hour longer everyone was headed home or to bed. Pope and Cleo went back to the Heywards and Kiara went back to her house. Sarah decided to stay at the chateau with John B, then of course JJ asked you to go to his room and talk with him.
You sat on JJ's bed after getting your shower, you waited for him to finish up in the shower. JJ left some of his clothes on his bed for you to change into.
Next thing you knew, you were under JJ, making out with him on his bed. You had no idea how you got here but you weren't going to complain.
JJ pulled you onto his lap, never disconnecting your lips from each other. He held onto your hips and pressed down as he grinded up. You moved your hips at a faster pace needing the friction. He tore his lips from yours taking a breath before speaking. "Truth or dare?" He asked as you rolled your eyes. JJ gave you a look that said 'just answer it'. So you did. "Dare." You said with confidence streaming through your veins. JJ rubbed your hips, slowly reaching for your butt to squeeze.
"Strip for me baby." He said as he squeezed. You blushed not knowing how to react. "Come on baby, let me see that gorgeous body you've got hiding under my baggy clothes." When JJ said that, you began to melt. You decided to just take your shirt off while on his lap. You weren't wearing a bra so he got quite the show very quickly. You got off of him as he pushed himself to sit on the edge of his bed. The idea to strip tease JJ came to your mind so that's exactly what you did.
At some point when you were completely naked, you wanted to tease him so you sat on his lap and pulled one of his hands forward to your aching hole. You teased yourself with his fingers, secretly wanting him to continue what you had started. Which he had no problem with doing. He pushed two fingers inside of you causing a gasp and moan mix, to fall from your lips.
JJ's hand raced to cover your mouth. "Shhhh you have to be quiet, baby, or we'll get caught." He whispered in your ear. You nodded and bit your lip as JJ moved his fingers back and forth in your tight hole. JJ was making you so wet, your pussy was so loud that you might just get caught by being fingered. "Tell your pussy to be quiet." He giggled in your ear. "Tell your fingers to stop making me feel so good then." You moaned leaning your head back onto his shoulder.
JJ smirked to himself, knowing he was doing a good job. He sped up trying to make you cum but you suddenly felt embarrassed. "JJ- this f-eels so g-good..but I think I have to go..to the bathroom-" That was music to JJ's ears. His movements only got faster, he moved your hand to your clit so you could help by rubbing yourself.
"JJ- I-I" A loud squeal started erupting from your mouth. JJ slapped his hand across your mouth. One more swift push into your pussy and he pulled out, a gush of fluid came rushing out. You kept moaning into his hand. He continued playing with your cunt until you were done squirting.
"Something tells me you've never done that before baby."
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aashi-heartfilia · 3 months
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Deku and Ochako: Two threads running in parallel
MHA has a vibrant cast with each character having its own quirks and perks. We often find ourselves shipping them and rooting for them to become cannon but in the midst of these shipping wars, we often overlook their personal journeys become true heroes.
One such pair is IzuOcha.
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People often view it as a straight vanilla ship and ignore everything that makes it special/different from the other so-called vanilla ships. The fact that their journeys were always running in parallel, fighting side by side, inspiring each other in a give and take relationship...but let's start from the very beginning....
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Chapter 3: The first time we meet Ochako, she saves Deku from falling on his two feet. She's nervous, but not as much as Deku. She wishes them both good luck and leaves. Now, this was their first meeting, and this is where their "Do your best" starts.
They both did their best in the exams, where Deku saves Ochako from the giant robot and Ochako in turns saves Deku from falling, like literally saving his life this time around.
Chapter 4: Then, the next time we see her, she was vouching for Deku, even at the cost of her own points. This also parallels her speech later in the manga.
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Chapter 7: They enter UA, finally meet each other again, and become friends. In fact, on the very first day, Ochako says that she likes the name Deku, as it kinda gives a "You can do it!" vibe. Another fun thing to note here is that in Japanese she refers to 'gambare' which literally means "Do your best!".
She changes the meaning of his name, from an insult to something inspiring and it might have looked like a comedy gag moment at that time, but when you look at future chapters, it was much more than that.
Chapter 8: The very next chapter, we see Deku facing off Bakugo and saying "He's the Deku who does his best!". And we even see the importance of what Ochako said as she inspired him to do his best. In that test, they both pass with flying colors.
Chapter 22: Then not after too long, we find out about Ochako's motivation to be a hero, which was to earn money so that her parents can have easier lives. Some might say, there are other ways to make money, why choose heroism?
Well, you need to look deeper into the character, especially for someone like Ochako that has layers to her character. She's not someone you can tell by looking at first glance. From outside, she might be all sweet and cherry but from the inside, there's a storm. She has an iron will, and that she depicted again and again, be it her battle with Bakugo in sports fest or her quirk awakening and battle with Toga in the 2nd war. She has always been like that.
On the surface, she presents herself to be your average girl next door, but when you look behind that facade, you'll see a plethora of emotions.
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She laughs with everyone but cries alone.
Her crying after Deku leaves (ch 37) or her thoughts about "who saves the heroes", or her "I didn't know the first thing about Toga" thoughts...
She has thoughts and emotions that are deep and not for not everyone can comprehend them. Some people might still see her as nothing more than a blatant love interest but we know that's far from the truth and that's why we'll deep dive into her character a little more.
Ochako has a lot of self-respect >>>
Despite what inspires her to be a hero, she refuses to take help from anyone. This is depicted when she refuses to take help from Deku in the SF. She felt embarrassed when Iida challenged Deku as that made her question her own ideals.
They were all there to become heroes and that makes them all rivals, even if they are friends and thus she challenges him to meet her at the finals.
I think that was a very underrated Ochako moment. (can't present all the pictures because Tumblr only allows less than 10 pics, but you can see it in the collage above)
From the very first day, her "let's do our best!" moment to their battle with Toga in the final war, she has been challenging / inspiring Deku but due to her soft personality, it gets overlooked very often.
It parallels Bakugo in a way and I love the parallels between Bakugo and Ochako but that is for another day.
So it's safe to conclude that just like Bakugo who has been a hardcore rival in power and ideals, Ochako has also been a friend / rival both in terms of power and ideals, although it might be more of her morals that inspire him the most. He even thinks about her in his final battle with Shigaraki, because she was the only one that resonates with his idea of saving villains but more on that later.
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Chapter 37: After her loss, Deku goes to check on her and it turns out she was doing fine. She has taken it very positively or so it may seem but as soon as Deku leaves, she starts crying and Deku overhears her. He even feels guilty about not being able to do anything for her.
And that shows you how perceptive Deku really is. He's not some dumb, dense MC that has no clue how others are feeling. He's very sensible and wouldn't cause unnecessary trouble.
Chapter 45: After the sports fest, we see everyone choosing their hero names and Izuku chooses Deku. We even get a reaction panel of both Ochako and Bakugo. Bakugo always looked down on Deku and used it as an insult to call him 'useless' but Ochako changed its meaning to some positive, more meaningful.
Then in the following chapters (ch 46) they both go for their internships where Deku learns to control his 5% from Grand Torino and Ochako learns combat from Gunheads and I might say, IzuOcha might be the only people who learned the most from their internships, lol.
From then onwards, they both continue to grow in terms of power, as the story starts focusing on other characters as well, and we see less of her. Plus, her slight crush starts to develop from that point on, which made most people overlook her entire story.
But let's go over some of the key moments from that time:
Aoyama and Ochako vs 13: Aoyama teases Ochako about Deku, and this might be the first mention of her having a crush on Deku (ch 67)
Izuku encounters Shigaraki at the mall: If it wasn't for Ochako, everyone in the mall, including Deku would have died, making it the 2nd time Ochako saved Deku's life, quite literally (ch 68 and 69)
God knows what would have happened if Ochako didn't come back at the right time. She called the police and alerted everyone. Ochako doesn't get enough credit for her responsible and mature nature.
Chapter 76-77: Deku vs Muscular and Chapter 80: Ochako and Tsuyu vs Toga 1.0 where Deku and gang's interference saved them kinda like how Ochako's presence in the mall saved Deku from Shigaraki, although that was more serious.
Chapter 100: Ochako, Iida and Deku meet Hatsume. Yeah, that iconic encounter that has another parallel.
Chapter 102: Ochako realises her feelings for Deku.
Chapter 105: Deku realises it's not Ochako.
The thing is, Deku knew from the get go that the stranger is not Ochako. He even says "Ochako has been training to use her quirk and now she can float herself for some time, ignoring the side effects. In a situation like this, she wouldn't forget to use it and to reveal herself to the enemy without a plan?"
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No, you're not the Uraraka I know.
And that, says volumes out there relationship! Even though, we saw how Ochako had romantic feelings for Deku in the previous chapters, she still kept on improving and Deku acknowledged that!
Even if we don't see him analysing her quirk again and again like Bakugo, he always keeps an eye on her, because note that in the manga, she never specifically tells him about her improvement but he still noticed it!
He knows Ochako enough to know that she's smart and strategic and that she would never reveal herself in front of the enemy without a solid plan. So when he saved Toga (disguised as Ochako) he knew that it wasn't Ochako!
And that's pure respect.
It is one of the examples of "Show, don't tell".
Chapter 107: Ochako quickly followed Deku's idea because she trusts him so much.
Chapter 109: And later, we see her struggling to keep her feelings under check. Because she's so inspired by Deku to do her best, it becomes an internal battle of emotions. At one point, she wants to compete with him, on the other, she has feelings for him that she can't control.
After that, it's a brief period of self-reflection from Ochako. We start seeing her less and less. She gets busy with her internship with Ryukyu and the team and we later see that they help defeat that giant villain in ch 156.
We later see that one of the biggest developments of Ochako comes from ch 163, where she regrets not being able to save Sir Nighteye.
In the class 1a vs 1b arc, she saves Deku when his quirk blackwhip goes haywire. If it wasn't for her quick thinking, again God knows what would have happened.
She may not have numerous power quirks like Deku but she's a capable hero in her own right and that is depicted in the Joint training arc when not only does she save Deku, but also manages to KO 3/5 people in the opponents team (Monoma, Rei, Poltergeist). She was literally the MVP of that arc.
Plus we get to see more of what runs inside her brain. Her ideology about forms the basis for one of the greatest arcs in the story.
"Who saves the heroes when they are in pain?"
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After JTA, they again go to their internships and when they come back Deku apologises for what happened during JTA. Note that even though it was never shown, he was still concerned about Ochako.
He was sad that he unknowingly hurt her (much like how he says thank you very later after her speech). But Ochako on the other hand brushes it off, saying it's not a big deal and it inspired her to use wires much like Sero and Deku.
So, we see this relationship of give and take come into play again and again where they both inspire the other to do their best. Then they share a cute fist bump.
On Christmas, out of pure coincidence (wink** wink** Horikoshi) they both receive each other's presents.
Also note that, Ochako gets her hero costume upgraded after JTA, where she starts using those grappling hooks to grab and throw stuff, much like Deku and also attaches tiny rockets in her heels for more mobility.
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Plus, that cute tiny pocket where she keeps her AM plushie❤️(that she got as Christmas gift from Deku). I think, after Bakugo and Deku, she has the most useful costume upgrade in the entire class!
Also, when Deku has a battle with Shigaraki in the 1st war, there is an entire chapter dedicated to Ochako vs Toga. Plus, she also gets to witness the aftermath of the war and her face, even now serves as the highlight for that chapter (ch 295).
The ragged blanket of heroism shed that day and what was left was the remains, of what it means to be a hero.
And for someone who was initially there for the money, it is especially important that she gets to witness this. It was the true horrors of hero society. She witnessed all this and still chose to stay in that line of work already says that she is way past her old thinking.
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She's not some government agent like Hawks or Nagant or training to become the No 1 hero like Deku, Bakugo or Endeavour. Her life is simple, much like the citizens she saves, but it still matters.
And that's what makes her a People's Hero.
And finally after the first war, Deku leaves UA and Ochako rethinks "Who saves the heroes when they are in need?" and after that point onwards there was no looking back as her character arc takes a great turn!!
We get an entire arc of Dark Deku, indulging more and more into the darkness of his own powers and almost 10 chapters later we see a completely different Ochako.
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I still remember people talking about it when ch 319 dropped.
This Ochako is ready to take action and takes shit from no one! One of the greatest character developments if you ask me. Ochako in a way is more like Lucy from Fairytail. Gets ignored most of the time but their moments are just as important.
Even though Deku went around saving people for days, people started viewing him as a villain. Ochako's speech brought him back to being a human.
Not a hero, not a villain, just a human.
And then we see her thinking about Toga, and how she didn't know the first thing about her in ch 342. She had a chat with Deku, where she confided in him. I think that kind of emotional intimacy is what makes their relationship interesting.
Her morals matter a lot to Deku, believe it or not! And that's why when she asks him to leave and take care of Shigaraki in ch 348, he thinks back to this conversation and unwillingly obliges.
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Because he has faith in her, the kind that cannot be expressed in words. That comes from a long time understanding of each other...that is beyond comprehension for many people and that's why her "Do your best!" matters because that's what they have been doing since the day they met!
~Sunshine
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Text
like a Moth to a Flame
pt.1
masterlist
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you never do choose the right guys...
[cheater+ex!jj maybank x fem!reader x toxic!rafe cameron]
warnings: cheating, insecure!reader
summary: jj cheats on you and you decide to break up
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Not going to lie, dating JJ in any way was not expected.
Sure, you're best friends with Kiara and Sarah, even after Kiara's Kook year, but you didn't live exactly on the Cut or Figure 8. Your family is middle class, your dad is working as a computer engineer and your mother was a nurse, so not rich nor poor, just average.
Just normal.
That's why when you saw JJ sneaking another girl out of the Chateau after a big party, you weren't surprised, just...disappointed.
You weren't really a Pogue or a Kook, it didn't feel like you were enough for either of those two sides.
No matter how many times your friends told you otherwise, so when you saw another Pogue being pulled out of their house...
"JJ...?" A gentle whisper called out his name. He raised his head and stared straight into the [e/c] eyes of his girlfriend, or ex-girlfriend.
Unlike you, Kiara wasn't shocked into silence.
"God, what is wrong with you, JJ!" She snapped, grasping your upper arm and pulling you away. He grabbed your other wrist, yanking you to him and breaking Kiara's grasp.
"It's not what it looks like, Princess. I just saw her in the kitchen and-"
"JJ, we saw you..." Pope grimaced, avoiding his friend's betrayed gaze.
"I- JJ, why would you..." You choked on your words before tears started to fall. "Did I do something?" The pale hand he still had on your wrist started to burn.
"No! No, no, no, no, no!" He wiped the tears from your eyes before leaning in. That itself made Kiara nearly launch herself at him with an axe but Pope quickly made a save.
"Jesus, Kie!" He whispered, giving the miffed girl a stern glare.
You pushed JJ away, turning your head away from him.
"I think we should-"
"No."
You scoffed, the shock wearing off and leading to anger.
"Let's go and let them...talk." John B's voice silenced all of them as they realized that both of you needed time to yourselves. He sent you a sympathetic stare before leading the others back into the house.
When they finally leave, you focus back on the blonde boy in front of you with his regretful electric blue eyes.
"What do you mean by 'No'?"
"No, we can't break up." He bit his lip, staring down at the wet sand.
"Too bad, I wanna break up, so we're gonna break up."
"I physically can't...that'll mean that you don't love me anymore..."
"I don't know why you still think I love you. You cheated on me!" Your anger alerted the shaggy, blonde, haired boy that there clearly should be begging involved.
"But you-I love you!" His desperate tone caught your attention, but you refused to feel any differently.
You were lying, you were surprised JJ hadn't caught on, he used to understand you like you were his second skin. And that made it sad when he fell for your lies.
Of course, you still loved him, that wouldn't change, but it needed to start somewhere.
And it started with a lie.
"Bye...Maybank."
"Princess! Please..." But you left him standing there, alone.
Without you.
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banner creator posted on my pinned post
I genuinely thought I could go through the breakup and rafe being toxic and jj being jealous right here rn
it didnt happen
this will be a series.
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starlight-bread-blog · 5 months
Text
The Fortune in The Fortune Teller
This is an isolated look into this specific episode.
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The Fortune Teller is the 14th episode of book 1 of Avatar: The Last Airbender. It is famous for supposedly developping the show's romantic subplot between Katara and A\ang. The episode does two things: A\ang attempts to flirt with Katara, and Katara is finally willing to consider him as more than just a friend.
However, I believe that this episode could have masterfully foreshadowed the pair not getting together in the end. In this essay I will detail how each step the episode takes towards a Kat@ang endgame is actually foreshadowing the opposite.
1. Katara and the Nature of Destiny
In the beginning, the Gaang meets a person getting attacked by a bear. He is acting incredibly passive, simply dodging the bear's attemps at his life. Then, A\ang and Appa interfere to help the man. When the Gaang questions him on why he was so passive, he says it's because the Fortune Teller told him he'd have a safe journey. They then have the following exchange:
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The man's logic is obviously flawed. If the Gaang didn't interfere, if the man continued to passivaly dodge, the bear would have attacked him. Fortune and destiny come from agency – from actively shaping them.
However, Katara is delaited at the prospect of seeing the future. Her and the Gaang go to meet the Fortune Teller, Aunt Wu. Aunt Wu tells her she'll marry a very powerful bender. Later, she comes back asking more details about her future husband. Remember her excitment, fantacising about her future husband:
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After that, Katara becomes somewhat reliant on Aunt Wu's prophecies. She goes as far as to ask her what she should eat.
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And she obeys her "prophecy", despite not wanting to. She became like the man from the beginning. She knowingly follows the fortune even though it doesn't make sense. She had given up on forging her own destiny.
Although by the end of the episode, she is no longer in this state of reliance, she still believes in the prophecies. Then, Sokka says that A\ang is a very powerful bender. This reminds her of what Aunt Wu said about her future husband. I don't want to cherry pick, so I took 4 different pictures of her face when she realizes A\ang might be the powerful bender she is to marry:
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With the look in her eyes, with her mouth tilted down and with the ominous music, this could easily be read as disappointment. Especially when remembering how she fantacized about the powerful bender earlier in the episode. She doesn't smile, but looks concerned. As if she doesn't want this. Earlier in the episode, she says this:
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A\ang is like the papaya. The fortune says he's right for her, but Katara doesn't want him. Now, she isn't like the man, passively dodging the bear attacking her. She shouldn't sit and wait for the prophecy to come true point blank. She has the agency to shape her own destiny and not to choose A\ang as her future husband.
2. A\ang, Meng, and First Crushes
In this episode we're introduced to a girl named Meng. Aunt Wu told her she'd end up with someone like A\ang, and so she developped a one sided crush on him. Throughout the episode she attempts to talk to him, all to no avail. Because A\ang is not interested in her.
Interestingly, her one sided crush is directly paralleled to A\ang's crush on Katara.
Exhibit A:
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Exhibit B:
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Exhibit C:
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Please note that in exhibits B and C in particular, there is an emphasis on the other party not reciprocating their feelings.
In this parallel the show draws, A\ang is Meng, the younger, shorter one the one who is in love; and Katara is A\ang, the older, taller one who... *checks notes*... doesn't reciprocate.
But in the end, A\ang and Meng have a heart-to-heart.
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Sometimes you'll like someone, and they aren't going to feel the same way, and even though it's hard, it's okay. They're young, just kids having a crush. A\ang responds to this with "I know what you mean". Because he, just like the audience that watched the parallels, knows that Katara likely doesn't return his feelings.
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In conclusion, The Fortuneteller could have been brilliant foreshadowing to Kata\ang not being the endgame couple, and it would have done so through beautiful, mature lessons about first loves and destiny. Thank you for reading.
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