#i did but i didn’t do anything to help since i hate raising my military since it takes such a big toll on my economy)

[d1anna]

sorry i haven’t been online i’ve been hyperfixating on bolstering my dynasty in ck3

[justabigassnerd]

Deployments Suck

Pairing - Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x daughter!reader

Word count - 3,391

Warnings - injuries, hospitals, mentions of death, mentions of Goose, panic attack

Summary - while on a deployment, your dad gets injured in an eerily similar way to your grandfather

A/N - whaddup it's another fic from yours truly! This was another request sent in by an anon so I hope you like it and I did your idea justice! I have a fair number of fics to write but I know y'all also like my 'Hangman junior' fics so I think I might alternate between fics for that and my requests just to keep things balanced. Anyways I'll stop rambling, as per y'all please send in requests, feedback and enjoy!!

Being raised in a military household, deployments were no stranger to you. It didn’t mean you liked them. You hated them with every fibre of your being. It meant that for however long the Navy saw fit, your dad would be risking his life out there and you never knew if he was alive or not until you got his occasional messages or if you were lucky a phone call.

This deployment was no different. Your dad had come home one day with a glum look on his face, telling you he was going to be deployed for a couple of months. On the day he was deployed, you, like most families, went with your dad and Maverick to the dock to see him off where he gave you a large bear hug and told you to be good for Maverick as since the two made up, any deployment Rooster went on, he made sure you stayed with Maverick. You had watched as your dad disappeared into the sea of Navy personnel and boarded the carrier that would take him to god knows where. You had cried as the carrier left the dock while Maverick gave you a tight hug before he gently took you away and back to his house.

The days that passed while your dad was away felt like they were years long. School dragged on forever and you’d have little energy to do anything when you made it back to Maverick and Penny’s house. Maverick would always keep you up to date with what he was told about Bradley’s mission, making sure you knew your dad was safe. He’d always let you know when your dad contacted him, letting Maverick know when he was free so he could call you. Maverick saw how you hid your sadness from your dad, promising him that you were doing okay and that you were getting on well at school. After every phone call, Maverick would sit with you and tell you it’s okay to tell your dad you miss him, but you’d always shake your head and tell him you didn’t want him to worry about you.

“Sweetheart. He misses you too. It’s never easy being apart from family.” Maverick would always say as he held you while you fought back tears. He’d then usually do something to try to take your mind off what was upsetting you by taking you out on his motorbike despite Penny’s objections and he’d buy the both of you ice cream and you’d eat it as you watched the waves crashing against the shore. It helped to ease your mind for a little and you always appreciated Maverick’s efforts. As time went on you started to feel a little better. You still missed your dad like crazy, but Maverick, Penny, and Amelia made life a little easier and you knew that each passing day was one day closer to your dad coming home. One day, you were at school, tapping your pen against your notebook mindlessly as you thought about the question you were reading on the board when one of the office staff opened the door to your classroom and stepped in while apologising to the teacher for the disruption.

“I need y/n Bradshaw to come with me, please.” All eyes fell on you as a crescendo of ‘ooh’ erupted from your classmates as your teacher silenced them quickly.

“y/n, bring all your stuff with you.” The receptionist says as you go to stand up, making you move to scoop all of your books into your bag as you follow her out of the classroom, ignoring the whispers of your classmates as you go. You follow the receptionist to the school office where Maverick is standing, a worried expression on his face.

“Mav, is everything okay?” The innocence of your question and the worry on your face made his eyes instantly grow misty, fighting the tears back even more as he glances over at the receptionist, silently asking for some privacy. The second the receptionist is out of sight; Maverick turns back to you taking a deep breath before he talks.

“y/n, it’s your dad.” Your heart plummeted into your stomach at his words and all Maverick could see at that moment was the same expression he saw from Carole when he had to tell her about Goose.

“What happened?” You asked instantly, worry clawing at your stomach as Maverick gestured for you to follow him. He doesn’t miss you glancing back at the school and then back at him.

“I’ve got you excused for a few days so don’t worry about that. We’ll head to the hospital and explain everything on the way.” Maverick says quickly as he leads you out to Penny’s car that she let him take the moment he told her what was going on. As you get in the car, Maverick explains that not even half an hour ago he got a call from Cyclone informing him that Bradley had been in an accident. He told you how your dad got caught in a jet wash and went into a spin where he was forced to eject but the canopy hadn’t quite cleared because of the spin. The second Maverick got the call he was sprinting out of Top Gun, going to tell Penny what was happening before coming straight to your school after Penny told him to take her car. Maverick continued to explain that while he didn’t know the severity of Bradley’s injuries, he knew he was being brought to the hospital on base. Maverick glanced over at you occasionally as he spoke, and he saw your eyes shining with tears as you processed everything that he was telling you. Maverick was also trying his hardest to fight back the memories of Goose as he drove. What Cyclone had described to Maverick was way too close to what happened with Goose and Maverick was terrified that Bradley was going to meet a similar fate. Despite the surging memories of his best friend and worry for his godson, Maverick was trying to stay strong for your sake because he knew you needed someone to lean on right now and like he did for Carole and Bradley all those years ago, he would do the same for you. When you make it to the hospital, Maverick finds a place to park and the two of you climb out of the car.

The smell of disinfectant was pungent when you walked through the automatic doors of the hospital, making your nose wrinkle instinctively. You stuck to Maverick’s side as he approached the front desk, fear chewing on your stomach as you glance around the hospital seeing doctors and nurses rushing around.

“We’re here for Lieutenant Bradshaw.” Maverick says the second you reach the desk. The receptionist glances up at him and then at you before turning his attention back to his computer.

“Family?” The receptionist asks, looking back up at you and Maverick.

“Yes. I’m his godfather and this is his daughter.” Maverick explains, fighting to keep his cool as the receptionist types away on his computer once more.

“He’s only just been brought in so you guys may have to wait a bit while the doctors assess and treat him.” The receptionist states calmly before gesturing in the direction of the waiting room. You and Maverick head into the waiting room and take seats in the corner of the room, glancing at the other people in the waiting room as you sit down. As you took your seat next to Maverick you couldn’t stop your leg from bouncing anxiously as you waited. You tried flicking through the old magazines to take your mind off being in the hospital, but nothing could soothe your rapidly beating heart and racing thoughts. Out of nowhere, your breaths became short and rapid, and you felt like you couldn’t breathe. It felt like there was an iron fist closing around your lungs and squeezing them so tight that no air could get in or out of them no matter how hard you tried. You were so frozen with fear and panic that you couldn’t move to get Maverick’s attention until he looked up from his phone. His eyes immediately widened when he realised what was going on. Your wide eyes and shortness of breath were tell-tale signs that you were having a panic attack.

“Hey y/n/n. Look at me.” Maverick says softly, managing to get your attention on him, your teary eyes locking with his. Maverick could see the rapid rising and fall of your chest and his brain started to formulate ideas of how to help you out.

“y/n, sweetheart, can I touch you?” Maverick asks gently, waiting for you to respond and it takes you a moment, but you manage to force a nod. Maverick carefully takes your hand in his and places it on his chest so you could feel his heartbeat and the slow rise and fall of his chest.

“You feel that? Focus on that, okay?” Maverick continues, taking slow, deep breaths for you to follow. Your focus wanders and you start to look around at the people in the waiting room, worried they’re looking at you.

“Hey, hey, eyes on me kid. Just keep focusing on my breathing and try to follow along, okay?” Maverick carefully navigates getting your attention back on him as he squeezes your hand to keep your focus on his breaths. He continues taking slow breaths and quietly counting how long to inhale, hold and release the breaths and he watches as your chest stops rising and falling as rapidly as it was initially. He keeps going until he’s sure the panic attack has passed. He waits for you to speak on your own terms as you take your hand away from him, fiddling with your fingers in your lap as your eyes fall to the floor in front of you.

“Thank you, Mav.” You managed to say, your voice thick with tears as you used the sleeves of your hoodie to wipe the tears off your cheeks.

“Are you okay?” Maverick asks softly, his gaze not once leaving you as you sniffle before giving him a weak nod.

“I’m better than I was. That was really scary.” You admit, scuffing your shoe against the linoleum floor of the waiting room.

“Yeah, panic attacks can be scary. I say that from experience.” Maverick says, thinking back to all the panic attacks he had after Goose died and how Iceman helped him without hesitation. He thought back to the ones he had when he’d have nightmares of Bradley getting shot down after the uranium mission and how Penny would coach him through getting through them.

“I’m just so scared. What if dad dies? I’ll be alone.” You whisper, tears pooling in your eyes once more and rolling down your cheeks as Maverick pulls you into his arms, gently squeezing you as you bury your face in his jacket.

“Your dad is tough. He’ll make it. But you’d never be alone if something happened. You have me, Penny, Amelia, and all of Dagger Squad.” Maverick says gently as he runs a hand up and down your back soothingly as you hide further in his jacket. Maverick continues to reassure you that your dad was going to be okay. He knew it was most likely a bad idea since he could be giving you false hope, but he had faith that Bradley would pull through. Once you’ve been calmed down, you and Maverick chat quietly to each other for a couple of hours, seeing people leave the waiting room and new people entering until a nurse comes in.

“Family of Lieutenant Bradshaw?” At the nurse’s voice, you and Maverick got out of your seats crossing to the nurse who smiles gently at the two of you.

“Is he okay?” You ask when you reach her.

“Yes. He’s going to make a full recovery. I can take you up to him if you’d like?” You and Maverick immediately nod at her words and follow the nurse up to your dad’s hospital room as you feel relief setting in that he’s going to be okay. When you enter the room, you see your dad lying in his hospital bed, fast asleep as the heart monitor beeps steadily.

“He’s been given a fair amount of pain medication to make sure he’s not feeling any pain, but it’ll also help him rest which is what his body needs to recover.” The nurse explains as you cross to his bedside, pulling up a chair alongside the bed and taking your dad's hand in yours. You hear Maverick thanking the nurse before she leaves and then crosses to you.

“I’m gonna grab us something to eat and drink and call Penny. Will you be okay up here for a bit?” Maverick asks, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder to draw your attention to him.

“I’ll be okay, Mav.” You reply quietly, smiling at Maverick who returns with a smile of his own.

“Call or text if you need anything.” Maverick says, ducking down to press a kiss to the top of your head before exiting the room in search of food. You don’t move from your spot, turning your attention back to your dad as you start to talk about what has happened between now and the last time you got to call him. You knew he probably couldn’t hear you, but it brought some form of comfort to just talk to him. You told him about how Maverick took you out on his motorbike and you smiled to yourself, imagining how your dad would react to that. After a while, Maverick reappears in the room with some food and drink which he hands to you, sitting in a seat of his own before pointing at the food with his fork.

“You haven’t eaten in ages, eat up kiddo.” He says, digging into his own food which you follow, not realising how hungry you were until you started eating. You finished your food pretty quickly and thanked Maverick. You and Maverick continue to chat as you hope for your dad to wake up soon. As the sun begins to set, Maverick excuses himself briefly to grab some water and when he returns, he finds that you had fallen asleep. Your head was resting on the bed, and you were still holding onto Bradley’s hand. Just as Maverick crosses to you, a nurse enters the room and smiles at Maverick.

“Visiting hours are over now, sir.” He says with a gentle smile as he looks from Maverick to your sleeping form.

“Can she stay?” Maverick asks, looking at the nurse who nods lightly.

“She can stay. Do you want me to set up a bed for her?” The nurse asks kindly.

“No. No point in disturbing her.” Maverick replies, finding a piece of paper and a pen before scribbling a note for you in case you wake up while he’s gone. After placing the note on the bedside table, he takes his jacket off and drapes it across your shoulders before pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

“If it’s possible, I’d appreciate it if someone could call me if he wakes up while I’m not here.” Maverick says before finally leaving the room and making his way home to Penny and Amelia.

The next morning when Maverick entered Bradley’s hospital room, you were still asleep, but Bradley was awake, smiling tiredly over at Maverick as he ran a thumb over the back of your hand.

“Hey, Mav.” Bradley mumbles. Maverick lets out a sigh of relief before crossing to his godson.

“Hey, kid. It’s good to see you awake. You scared the shit out of us.” Maverick says as he pulls up the other chair to Bradley’s bedside.

“I scared the shit out of myself too.” Bradley admits with a weak chuckle, wincing when a spark of pain flashes through him.

“Do I need to get a nurse?” Maverick asks, noticing the wince and preparing to stand up and go in search of a nurse.

“No, I’m okay.” Bradley says quickly, his words making Maverick stop his movement and settle back into his seat.

“How’s y/n been?” Bradley then asks, gazing down at you softly as you continued to sleep.

“She’s been okay. She had a panic attack in the waiting room yesterday and she was terrified she was going to lose you. But after getting to come in here with you, I think it helped calm her down.” Maverick explains, adjusting the jacket that had half slipped off during the night.

“Thank you for being there for her Mav.” Bradley says quietly, guilt beginning to gnaw at his stomach for this situation. When he first held you in his arms after you were born, he swore to himself that he’d always be there for you. After losing his dad so young he didn’t want to put you through the same pain that he went through. On every deployment, he would do his absolute best to come home to you. When his jet went into that spin all he could think about was you and if he was going to make it home. Bradley gently wiggles his hand free from your grip and begins to run his hand through your hair, smiling lightly to himself when you begin to stir. When your eyes blink open Bradley gently ruffles your hair.

“There she is.” He says with a grin as you focus on your surroundings, sitting up suddenly when you realise your dad is awake.

“Dad, you’re okay!” You exclaim happily, tears welling in your eyes at seeing your dad awake and smiling.

“I’m okay.” He repeats, accepting the hug you embrace him in. You tried to be mindful of his injuries, but Bradley didn’t care, he just wanted to give you a hug.

“I missed you. Deployments suck.” You mumble into his shoulder.

“I missed you more. And yes, deployments do suck.” Bradley replies with a chuckle as you pull away from the embrace, sitting back in your chair and handing Maverick his jacket which had slipped off in your excitement. You quickly wipe at your eyes to rid them of any tears.

“You doing okay, sweetheart?” Bradley asks softly, regarding you with his gentle gaze.

“I’m doing better now I know you’re okay.” You admit with a small smile. Before anything else could be said, a nurse enters the room with a bright smile on her face.

“It’s good to see you awake Lieutenant Bradshaw. How’s the pain for you?” The nurse asks kindly as she picks up his chart.

“It’s not too bad. I’m sure I’m meant to be in a lot more pain given what happened to me so whatever meds you’re giving me are doing their job.” Your dad says with a grin as the nurse scribbles things down before checking his iv and monitors.

“That’s good. I’m glad you’re not in pain. I’ll leave you be for a bit, but I’ll have to come back to check you over.” The nurse says, writing some more things down before returning the chart and leaving the room.

“Do you want to head home and get some rest, y/n/n? I can’t imagine the sleep you had last night wasn’t great given that you were hunched over.” Bradley asks when he notices your attempt to hide a yawn behind your hand.

“No, I’m okay. I just want to be with you.” You say quickly, shaking your head adamantly as Bradley smiles knowingly. He knew you were scared of him being out of your sight and something happening while you were not there. He knew he’d be exactly the same if it were you in the hospital bed. He wanted you to rest comfortably but he knew any debate with you was a losing one, you’ve had him wrapped around your little finger since the day you were born.

“Alright then.” Bradley chuckles, looking over at Maverick who shrugs jokingly.

“I think she’s sticking by your side until you’re out of hospital.” Maverick says with a smile as he pats you on the back.

“I guess this is what I should expect when I raise a daddy’s girl, huh?”

[ghostgorlsworld]

Johnny Boy (Werwolf! Soap x reader) Part two

Once upon a time, you would've done anything for John Mctavish. He had been your older brother's cool best friend, and you were always desperate for him to see you as more--until one fateful night that ends up with you pregnant and him...gone. Fast forward six years and you've made a good life for yourself with your daughter Emma, with Johnny none the wiser. Until he decides to knock on your door.

You can find part one here

Part two:

You dismissed every call that lit up your phone for days, ignoring Tom while he beat down your door, ignoring Susan when she left endless tearful voicemails. 

It was a betrayal. It cut deep, reminding you of the days when Tom and John were attached at the hip, always together and never letting you in the loop. Everyone always loved John, and you were sure with the right amount of mournful blue-eyed looks and apologies, your family was willing to let him back in without even a thought.

But they weren’t there, were they? That night when you thought he wanted you, his teeth in your throat, his hips cradled in your thighs. 

You woke up alone, sore between your legs and dried blood on your sheets. He was long gone, Tom having driven him to the airport early that morning.

You were twenty, he was twenty five, the same age as your brother. Within two months, you were showing and he was nowhere to be found, off playing hero in some distant war.

Emma didn’t understand. You catch her looking outside curiously, seeming to be searching for someone. You find things out of place in your closet, where she must have been looking for some relic of his.

There are none. He left you nothing of his except her.

“He’s going to come back,” she said, once, while the two of you were having dinner. 

You were still in your work clothes, a sweater and a pencil skirt, your fork half-way to your mouth. “Who, Emma?” She looked at you, so knowing for a child so young. “My dad. Can’t you smell him?”

A chill slid down your spine. “Emma, I’m not like you,” you said. “Where did you smell him?” “On you, Mum,” she said, as if it was obvious. “He’s all over you.” It seemed the military taught him a few tricks. 

The next day, Emma was proved right.

It was an early Saturday morning, Emma was still asleep in your bed while you shifted quietly in the kitchen, half paying attention to the telly playing some mindless cartoon. 

A knock on the door. 

You paused, lowering your cup of coffee. 

You hated that you always knew when he was around. Some nameless feeling that you’ve had since you were a little girl.

Another knock, this one more insistent.

His voice, calm and deep. “Come on, hen, let's have it out.”

You took a step towards the bedroom, having half a mind to close the door and ignore the knocks until he went away.

“Don’t.” 

You paused, mid-step. 

“Please.”

Johnny never said please. He was the fighter, always unyielding and laughing, thinking it was funny when his mouth got him in trouble.

You’re wearing a soft slip and a robe. You tie it before you open the door, your hands trembling against the door knob.

He looked awful. His eyes were red, like he hadn’t slept in the last three days, his hair ruffled. He was wearing your brother's clothes that didn’t quite fit, another stir of anger in your chest at the thought of Tom letting him stay at his house.

The fucking traitor. 

“You look like shit,” you said, your words like a bite. 

His mouth twitched. “I missed you too, kitty.”

God you hated that word. You got that nickname at three years old and you’ve despised it ever since.

“What do you want, John?” You asked, your fingers white against the knob. 

John leaned in close, like he couldn’t help it, inhaling deeply. His eyes got brighter, an inhuman gleam. “Kitty, I’m so fucking sorry.”

“For what? For fucking me and leaving me to raise your kid? For the six years of silence?” You looked away from his intense stare, knowing full well if you gave an inch he would take a mile. Johnny was like this when you were kids too, so harmless and smiling until he wasn’t, until someone touched one of his toys or took him away from you and Tommy’s house.

“For everything, hen, I…you didn’t deserve any of it,” John stepped even closer, his palm against your door. “Look at me, kitty, c’mon, I’ve thought of you every fucking day for six years and I’ve just found out you’ve had my pup alone.”

“And how do you know I was alone?” You spat, wanting to hurt him, to let him know that you weren’t his anymore.

That might have been the wrong thing to say. Johnny stiffened, his breath hot against your cheek. “Because you still smell like me, kitty.”

Which made no sense. You’ve had sex since he left, a few dates here and there while Emma was staying the night at her grandparents. There should be nothing left, no trace of him–you made sure of it. “I just…I just wanna meet her. Please, hen, I’m her father.” 

There’s a part of you that understands that if you refused, Johnny would find a way. Nothing could stop Johnny when he really, really wanted something and wolves were different from normal men. Territorial. 

But if you let them meet, then it would be all downhill from there. Emma would get attached and Johnny would enjoy playing daddy for a month or two, then time would be up. He would be across the world again, taking bullets and ripping throats, and you would be here, being a mother and paying the bills.

“John,” you said, suddenly so full of sadness. Why did you have to be the bad guy? Why did it happen like this?

In another life, you would have wanted this with him. Marriage, kids, the whole nine yards–but instead, you had to be the evil bitch keeping him from his kid, though both of you knew he would just break her heart.

“I know, kitty,” he said, like he knew what you were thinking. “But I walked away once. I cannae do it again.” You looked away again, chewing on your lip. His hand twitched and you remembered the way it felt against your hip, pulling you underneath him. 

The memory soured your stomach. It was five years ago, for God’s sake, and he was drunk. You shouldn’t remember it with any sort of fondness.

“Come back tomorrow,” you said finally, crossing your arms over your chest. “Eight thirty for breakfast. I’ll do my best to…prepare her.”

Johnny made to touch you, maybe to hug or grip your shoulders but you flinched back, your spine bumping into the door.

“Kitty-” he began but you shook your head, already reaching for the door handle. “Goodbye John.”

Emma was eating lunch when you pulled out a chair at the kitchen table, sitting down with a sigh.

It was time for the talk.

The You Have A Father and He Wants to See You and I Can’t Say No Talk.

Emma, as always, was unflappable. She turned the pages in the Louis L’Amour book every morning when she woke, and every night before dinner. Why would a father materializing out of nowhere phase her?

“Why did he leave?” She asked, tearing tiny triangles in her cheese toastie.

You took a moment to think about your answer. It wouldn’t do to make your daughter hate her father before she could even make her own opinions about him.

You, on the other hand, could hate him as much as you liked.

“He was enlisted in the military, remember?” 

She nodded. 

“They decided that he was…special. That he could do important work, but there was a price–he couldn’t let anyone know about the important work. They, um, well they had to hide him, keep him from the world so he…he never found out about you.” Emma was silent for a long time, now tearing the crust into crumbs. You waited for her, forcing back the emotion clogging your throat. “But he wants to see me now?” She asked, almost shy. 

“Yes, he’s…he’s your father. And he’s like you.”

That was something that really grated on your nerves, the fact that they were so alike, you couldn’t relate to your daughter’s wolfish instincts, couldn’t shift with her on the full moons, couldn’t smell her emotions like she could yours. 

“Grandpa was like me,” she said, loyal as always. 

“You don’t have to see him if you don’t want to, bear, I promise, I’ll keep him away if that’s what you want.”

Emma pondered this, finally taking a proper bite of her toastie. “I’ll meet him,” she decided. “I’d like to ask him about his secret missions.” You laughed. Wetly. “Alright. He’s going to have breakfast with us tomorrow.” “Eight thirty?” “Eight thirty.”

Emma finished her lunch, and that was that.

It seemed that the only person suffering in this situation was you.

“I’m sorry.” Tommy was upset, you could tell, his cheeks flushed red like they did when you were kids. “I don’t know what I was thinking but I saw Johnny and I thought…God, I can’t lie to him anymore. We can’t lie to him anymore.” “It wasn’t your decision to make, Tom,” you said, your voice reaching that pitch that made you feel like your mother. “At a fucking funeral no less.” “I know, I know. I’m sorry,” Tommy gripped your shoulders and wrestled you into a hug. “I’m a slag, I’m a fucking idiot, just don’t keep you and bear from me anymore, my house is like a fucking coffin without you two.”

“What, your waitress of the week hasn’t been keeping you company?” You snarked, your face in his chest. You allowed him to hug you, a part of you relaxing now that you weren’t pissed at your brother. “I heard John was staying with you.” “Just for now, he has Susan helping him find an apartment around here.”

You stiffened. “What?”

Tom winced, as if kicking himself. “Shit. I wasn’t supposed to say that.”

“God, who’s side are you on Tommy? He abandoned us for six years!” “You know just as well as I do that if he knew about Emma he would’ve been here from the very beginning.” Tommy didn’t understand. “But he didn’t, did he? He screwed your little sister while he was piss-drunk and then left without a word. I’ll never forgive him for it and you shouldn’t either.” “I wasn’t going to, love. I haven’t, really, but…look at him,” Tom clenched his jaw, the love of a brother resurfacing. You remembered being so jealous of their bond, the ease of their friendship. “The fucker’s been through hell, there’s no telling what they have him do out there.” “Nothing that he didn’t sign up for.”

“You and I both know how limited his options were,” Tom said, gripping your shoulders. “How limited Emma’s options will be.”

It wasn’t a thought you could bear to think about for very long. Getting a job, going to high school, getting accepted into college, all of these things were difficult for Emma’s kind, no matter what the government likes to say about equality.

Johnny was smart. So smart. He tinkered with everything, the telly, the lawn mower, your father’s old rifle–he would take things apart to see how they worked and then put them back together even better than they were before. 

It killed him when college after college rejected his applications. He had gotten into a few scraps over the years and they showed up on his records, so they stamped him down into the Aggressive list and threw away his application. 

The military snagged him shortly after, with promises of being with his own kind and not having to hide what he was.

You couldn’t blame him, not even when he stopped calling on your birthday or visiting for holidays. He had a real family in the military, one that wasn’t just you and Tommy. 

You had always been in love with him, forever the younger sibling that followed them around like a lost duckling. You were twenty when he came home again for the first time in a few years and your old feelings came back with a vengeance.

It hurt you more than you would ever tell that you weren’t enough to come home for. That the night you spent together was nothing more than the incident that gave you Emma.

“I know you loved him more than you would ever admit,” Tommy said gently, catching your chin when you tried to look away. “I know he hurt you so badly that it took you years to be able to ever look at another man. Trust me, I hate him for it too, but…he’s her father, love. She needs a father.”

And that was that. You were never enough for anyone, not even Emma. “I know,” you said. “That’s why I haven’t moved to the States and changed my name.” Tom laughed, and neither of you acknowledged that his laugh was about as damp as yours. “Are we still on for next weekend? I’ll need to pick up some ribeyes from the store if I’m going to have Em.” That was right. You had asked Tom weeks ago to watch Emma while you…well, while you went on a date. He was a nice guy, someone you met at work–he was cute in a bookish way, glasses and nice hair and knitted sweaters. You needed nice and cute, something to clear up the stain that Johnny left on you.

“Yeah, Charlie’s picking me up at six, so I’ll have Em over at five thirty.” Tom nodded. “Do…do you want me to tell Johnny why you’re off for the night?”

“God no. It’s none of his fucking business.”

[officalroyalsofpierreland]

Holyrood Palace Gardens, Edinburgh | Day before the Wedding

Magdalena: I take it we um…googled each other? Magnus: yeah…can I say that what happened to you is just awful! I cannot believe they still have power! Magdalena: They have a lot of control in the government….Mom is working with Dad and Grandpa to change it since this is not the first time they’ve caused harm to a royal. They just about fucked up Dad’s life prior to my birth by attempting to force him into marry my egg donor and stone walling the investigation on the attempt on her life at the same time..

Magdalena: Between them, people at school, and the press it’s just snowballed. Hence why I’m in Pierreland. Magnus: I’m glad that they are taking care of you Magdalena…Anything concerning about me that you found? Magdalena [giggling]: Surprisingly, no! Everything seems normal! I did see pictures of you and young Oliver and they were quite adorable! I…I envy the normalcy.

Magnus: My life is normal all things considered…really the only royal things I do are events like weddings and some ceremonial duties but other than that it’s just the military and charity work. Magdalena: I do like that you work with Pups for Life. It’s always been a special charity to my family, especially my parents. Magnus: I’ve been meaning to ask. By mom, do you mean Crown Princess Minerva?

Magdalena: Yes…she’s been my mom since forever….the woman who gave birth to me [Magdalena softly exhales] I’m only reminded that she contributed when I look in the mirror Magnus: I’m sorry for bringing her up. If it helps, you take after your Mom much more. I had the honor to hear her speak at a Pups for Life event in Pierreland once and it was so inspiring. Magdalena: She does have a knack for it.

Magnus [panicking and stammering]: You do as well! I was inspired to get back into my music due to your studies. If I didn’t have to join the military, I would’ve been a musician. Magdalena: What’s stopping you? Magnus: Duty…the fact I already committed…the fact that it just isn’t done. Magdalena: Oh I fucking hate that excuse. [Magnus laughs] Would you do music professionally? Magnus [chuckling]: I do not have your talents Magdalena…I may stick to doing music privately but I am open to incorporating charities for music education. Magdalena: I can definitely wait till my life becomes nothing but charity work. It seems so…boring Magnus: It is the royal life. Lots of privilege means we must raise awareness of causes.

Magdalena: I get it…it’s just, the microscope feels stifling but then again, [jokes] I guess the press doesn’t find you interesting enough! Magnus [laughing]: Don’t jinx me! I’m sure they’ll take more interest now that Oliver is getting married…or they won’t, who knows! I just take comfort in the fact that I will only be pushed farther down the succession line and that I desire a quiet life. I…I wish…no I want to give you that level of peace. Magdalena: I’d like that

Louis: There she is! What the fuck is she doing with Prince Magnus? Henri: There you are brother. Spying on Maggie is a new low for you.

Louis: I’m not spying Henri: Which is exactly what someone who isn’t spying would say. Louis: I’m just…worried about her… Henri: Really? Well color me shocked! Considering you were ignoring her for the past 2 months after you found out about her boyfriend. Louis: Who is a Prince and didn’t tell her. Henri: And she didn’t say she was a princess they’re even. Now come on.

Louis: He is suspicious…I mean…he’s Oliver’s age! Henri: You do know that Oliver was Maggie’s childhood crush right? Louis: Wait really? Henri: Man…for a best friend, you really don’t know a lot…now we need to get lost before Maggie sees you lurking out here and decides to slap you into next week.

Maria Aisha: There you two are! Mama is looking for you Louis. She wants to talk to you. Louis: About? Maria Aisha: Like I know. She doesn’t tell me shit. Figured you’d be spying on Maggie. You’re predictable and also horrible at spying. Doesn’t PIMA teach you to study your surroundings- Louis: Aisha, watch it Maria Aisha: oooo, I’m so scared. Henri: if you’re gonna spy, get better at it bro.

Katalina: Louis…I take it you know now that Maggie’s boyfriend is Prince Magnus [Louis grumbles] Katalina [annoyed]: What was that, Louis? Honestly, you are 19. I should not have to be asking for basics from you. Louis: I don’t trust him. Katalina: Well Maggie does. And that’s what I’m going to talk to you about—

Louis: What? that I need to trust Maggie more? Katalina: Well yes actually. Perhaps PIMA has taught you some things. Maggie has always been there for you. She’s always given you the benefit of the doubt and she’s even defended you at your dumbest moments [Louis opens his mouth to protest] I’m not finished yet Louis. The fact that you cannot trust her. Trust her judgement. It leaves me speechless. It puts you on the levels of the Lunarian House of-- Louis [defensively]: I am nothing like those old assholes! Katalina [sighing]: Then act like it! Stop giving her the silent treatment. Attempt to get to know Magnus. She’s not just someone you can call when you need her and then push aside, which was evident when you had your dalliance with Eloise. Louis[angrily]: What does Eloise have to do with this? Katalina: Because Maggie had misgivings about the relationship from the start, yet did you hear her telling you them while you both were dating? Did she freeze you out? Louis [mumbling]: No.. Katalina: Exactly. I expect you to do the same. For all of Maggie’s relationships. And it starts now.

Katalina: You will not do anything to cause problems for Oliver and Hortense, do you understand? Louis: But- Katalina: Louis Charles Marc. If you do something, I swear to the Watcher…PIMA will not save you from my wrath. You think your father being angry is scary, you have yet to see angry. [Louis shudders] Do not cause an international incident. Are we clear? Louis: Crystal Mama…

@simsroyallegacy

[callsign-bunnie]

You know what we talked about and discussed. Give me it, or I’ll break your ankles

-🩵(Blue)

You know, Blue, if I had known you would threaten my ankles, I don't think I would have agreed to write this /J

Anyway, thanks for helping me brainstorm ideas while I took a break last week (and thanks for the Bribe of ten dollars to write something on my Red List. I dunno, might have to take this off of it. I enjoyed writing it a lot.)

--

Phillip Graves, a young bright eyed alpha marine, who was taking a vacation in Mexico. He was between deployments, and a few of his buddies had mentioned heading to Mexico for the summer while they were off, and he’d tagged along.

He wasn’t super close friends with any of them, admittedly, he didn’t even really like many of them. Maybe, in some arrogant way, he believed they were beneath him. He knew his worth, he knew exactly where he wanted to end up, and most of them were content to just follow orders.

He would follow whatever orders he was given, for now, but he knew, in his head, that he was destined to be better than them.

Regardless, he got along with them. They weren’t too horrible to be around and he knew having friends was important. (It wasn’t that he couldn’t make friends, either. He actually had quite a few, but none that were also in the military.) So, he would hang out with them. And, he actually liked Mexico.

He’d been born and raised right in Dallas, Texas, so his family had taken several vacations down to Mexico growing up. He was pretty sure his father still owned a timeshare at a resort that was down there, too, though he refused to take advantage of it. That was another way he differed from his military buddies.

Pride.

He’d never admit to having too much of it, but his buddies seemed willing to ignore their own for any sort of personal gain. He wasn’t. He knew what kind of alpha he was, and he wouldn’t put that aside for anything.

“Phil.” 

He hated when they called him that, but he put it aside and turned to look at one of his buddies, raising an eyebrow. He was a sort of pudgy alpha, despite being in the military, and he didn’t really like him that much. He disliked him more than any of the others, at least. He didn’t quite seem to grasp his own insignificance. He was… self important, and not in the way Graves was. 

His name was Braeden, too. Graves… didn’t think commentary on that was all too necessary. When he didn’t continue to speak, he sighed softly and gave a sort of strained smile. “What’s up?”

“We were heading to a bar. Want to join? Since it’s the last day we’re here.” Braeden gestured to the four others. They were already at a bar, the hotel bar where they were staying, but… well, he didn’t mind moving to a different bar. 

“Sure.” He nodded, getting out some cash to pay for the singular drink he’d already ordered, and closing out his tab. He thanked the bartender, not bothering with Spanish. He’d tried to learn, took a few classes in High School, but he just couldn’t grasp it. French had been no problem, Spanish on the other hand?

It should have been easy, he knew, but… he just never had. 

Once everyone else had closed their tabs, Graves went back and tipped the bartender where they didn’t. It paid to be the “good” one and… well, he knew his mother might smack him if she saw him watch his friends not tip and didn’t do anything about it. Honestly, she might have still smacked him for the fact that he didn’t verbally correct them. But… he wasn’t in the mood.

As he stepped outside, he shielded his eyes, looking around for his buddies, and heading to the car they’d rented when he saw it. He did walk slowly, enjoying the feeling of sun on his skin. He loved that about the military, he loved being outside, he loved being ankle deep in dirt or mud. 

He loved getting his hands dirty.

When it was clear his friends were getting impatient, he half jogged to the car, getting in the back, and sitting next to Shawn. He didn’t mind Shawn, in fact they’d often shared an eyeroll at Braeden and Grant, the other,’s expense. Shawn was a lot more down to earth, he seemed to get it a lot more than they did.

He had a lot of similar values that Graves did, about how things were. What was expected of them, what they wanted. Granted, Shawn didn’t seem to have the same drive that Graves did, but he wasn’t without it. He wanted to move up, he wanted to be something, and he was willing to put in the work. Graves admired that.

They shared a look as Braeden immediately started to sing along to whatever was on the radio. Braedon couldn’t speak Spanish, either, though, so it ended up mostly sounding like he was yelling babble. 

Graves was very grateful that the car ride hardly lasted longer than ten minutes. 

When they made it to the bar, he followed them in. Of course, they sat at the bar, and the first thing Graves noticed was that the bartender was an omega. He smelled like cinnamon and brown sugar, but like it’d been melted to make the syrup his mother would use for cakes and pastries. 

He was slim, short, and… gorgeous. Big eyes lined with black, short curly hair that bunched around his head and shook as he moved, and a white button down top that was slightly unbuttoned to reveal smooth skin that Graves definitely pulled up a few images of running his mouth over.

Fuck.

Well, he considered his options. Grant was mated, Shawn didn’t seem to take a huge interest in omegas, and… Braeden was… Braeden. Fuck, Braeden might try.

He glanced over at Braeden, seeing he was nudging Grant and making a suggestive face while gesturing to the bartender, who had just promised to be with them in a moment. Braeden might embarrass him and then, even if he doubted Braeden had a chance, Graves would definitely not have a chance.

It was moments like these that he regretted his resolve to try to make friends. 

Finally, the bartender came over, smiling at them. It was a pretty smile, he was clearly young. Graves couldn’t be that much older, since he was only 26, but he’d put this bartender in the 20-21 range. “Hola, I’m Lucas! What can I get for you?”

Braeden opened his mouth, “Hola, chico-”

Graves resisted slamming his head directly into the bar top, just settling on giving the bartender a strained, sympathetic smile. He saw Lucas’s eyes almost go empty, his smile went just the slightest bit plastic, and Graves definitely agreed with the sentiment. 

Braeden, thankfully, just continued. “I’d love a margarita and your number.” Nevermind, not thankfully.

Lucas laughed, softly. “Sorry, I don’t have international calling.” He mimed making a phone call. “Limited phone plan.”

Graves, despite not being religious, prayed that Braedon would just take the loss and move on, but he didn’t. “That’s disappointing. How about what time you get off?”

“Maybe just the margarita.” Shawn spoke up, eyes rolling, and Graves decided he’d have to get him a gift or something as thanks. “Come on, man, just leave the poor omega alone.”

Braeden huffed and muttered something under his breath, but he was on the other side of Grant so Graves couldn’t hear. Shawn then continued, “sorry about him. He wasn’t outside trained. I’ll take whatever beer you have that comes in bottles.”

Lucas smiled, looking grateful, and he crouched for a moment, producing a bottle of Michelob a moment later. Grant ended up just ordering a paloma, speaking low to Braeden. It appeared he was soothing Braeden’s ego, which Graves tried not to roll his eyes at. His ego didn’t need to be soothed.

It was his turn to order, so he smiled at Lucas. “I’m in the mood to try something new. What do you suggest?”

Lucas appeared to give him a once over. “Do you think fruity drinks?”

“I’ll drink whatever you give me,” Graves half grinned, leaning forward a bit. “If you make me something fruity, I’ll enjoy it.”

“Oh? Whatever I give you?” Lucas leaned forward as well, getting this little cocky grin on his face. Fuck, Graves wanted to ruin him. “Hmm… Ever had a Paloma? It’s like a margarita but with grapefruit instead of lime.”

“I love grapefruit.” Graves answered, and then finally leaned back again. “I’ll take it.”

“Perfecto.” Lucas fully grinned and nodded. “Alright, so one margarita, two palomas.” He started to get out the things to make them and Graves avoided Braeden’s eye, practically able to feel his glare.

He could also scent him, even with the small distance, which had him almost rolling his eyes. He shared a look with Shawn before returning to watching Lucas make the drinks. He had started to converse with another bartender in Spanish, which appeared to also be an omega. The other glanced at the four, his eyes catching on Braeden, before he was laughing softly. 

Lucas kept a pleasant smile on his face, though Graves could very easily pick up that they may have been wounding Braeden’s ego more. He allowed himself one glance at Braeden, seeing he was glaring at a napkin.

Grant leaned over to Graves, “come on, man. You didn’t have to… undermine him like that. He was clearly going for it.”

“It was painful for all of us.” Shawn shot back. “If he wants to ‘go for it’ he needs to get better at it. It’s not Phil’s fault that Braeden has no fucking game.”

“Fuck you!” Braeden hissed. “I have game, you have no idea if I was failing or not. If you hadn't interrupted, I might have succeeded.”

“No you wouldn’t have,” the other bartender slid in. “Hi, I’m Rudy. Lucas got called to the back, so I’m going to take over. My English is better, but I don’t think I know what game means.”

Braeden went bright red, but Graves explained. “It’s like play, like… fuck. Charisma?”

“No… carisma.” Rudy laughed, softly. “I do not understand how that correlates to games.”

“To be a player, you have to know how to play the game.” Grant half grinned before suddenly wincing. “I have a wife, I don’t know why I said that.”

Well, at least he remembered. Graves winced, “it’s a loose term, now.”

“Ah.” Rudy nodded and then smiled, before he appeared to finish the cocktails. “One margarita, two palomas,” he said as he poured them, garnished them, and then passed them out. “Lucas will be back if you need anything else.”

All four just nodded and Rudy headed off, sliding right up to another alpha at the bar. It was clear they were close as Rudy immediately was leaning on his elbows, grinning at the alpha, who was grinning back.

Graves didn’t care, sipping his drink, and remarking on how much he hated grapefruit. He was sure it was good to someone else, but he just couldn’t. Regardless, he choked it down, ignoring when Braeden got up and suddenly left the bar. “I’ll pay his tab.” He told Grant, who threw him a glare before also getting up and leaving. “Fine, I’ll pay yours too. Fuck.”

Shawn laughed, softly, and got out some cash. “Here. I’ll… go babysit. Maybe don’t come back to the hotel until late.”

“Don’t worry, I have no plans to.” Graves snorted before nodding. “Have fun.”

“Oh, totally.” Shawn fake saluted before leaving, having to half jog to catch up to the other two. He saw him throw his hands out once he was outside, and he could faintly hear that he was yelling to them, but he couldn’t make out what they were saying.

Oh well, it wasn’t his fault that Braeden completely failed his shot. He turned back to the bar, startling as he met eyes with Lucas. “Fuck!” He exclaimed before immediately holding his chest and panting. 

Lucas appeared to flush before laughing softly, “Mil disculpas, Señor.”

Graves went to jokingly respond back in Spanish, but then he remembered Braeden making that mistake, so he just… refrained. He really didn’t want to turn Lucas off by being too cocky. “No problem. I’m not easy to startle, you should be proud.”

“Hmm… Okay. I will be.” Lucas nodded and then smiled. “How did you enjoy your drink?”

“It was fantastic.” Graves grinned, “but I think I’ll just settle on a bottled beer as well.” He didn’t want to have to force himself through more grapefruit.

Lucas nodded, again, and then crouched once more before producing a beer bottle. He winked at Graves before using the counter to very smoothly pop the cap off of the bottle before handing it to him. Graves remembered Shawn having to pop his own cap off and he tried very hard not to get smug. 

“Where did your friends go?” Lucas asked, once Graves had gotten a sip in. 

Graves shrugged. “Back to the hotel.” He may not have liked Braeden, but he wouldn’t immediately expose him by telling Lucas his ego had been too bruised. 

“Ah. No hay problema, te prefiero.” Lucas gestured to Graves, but all Graves could really pick up was problema, which he knew meant problem. No hay problema meant No Problem. The rest probably wasn’t that important.

So, he just shrugged and went back to sipping his beer, focusing his eyes on the tv screen which was playing soccer. Made sense, it was the season. Then, he was glancing back at Lucas, again, who’d started to wipe down the bar. “Do you like working here?” He asked.

Lucas shrugged. “I do. Could be better, but the tips are good.”

“You speak English fairly well… Get a lot of… uh… gringos?” He’d heard that word so many times, why did he forget it? God, maybe he wasn’t that much better than Braeden.

Lucas laughed, softly, and Graves’ face warmed. “We do. Las Almas… The city of souls gets a lot of visitors.”

“That’s what it means, then? The city of souls?” Graves raised an eyebrow. He liked that, he liked it a lot. 

Lucas smiled and nodded. “Yes. More specifically The Souls. I think, at one point, it was said that we collect them. Like La Parca.”

“La Parca?” Graves frowned, not recognizing that one. “Uh… my Spanish is terrible, I’m sorry.”

“At least you admit it. Hang on, my English is not the best. Rudy!” He called before whistling, causing the other omega to look up from where he was still talking to that alpha. “Qué es la parca en English??”

“Grim reaper.” The alpha was the one to answer. “I think so, anyway.”

Graves ahhed, smiling as Lucas turned back to him. “Las Almas collects souls?”

“Used to. Cartel violence drives them away, now. Mi familia and Rudy’s family are some of the few left that have been here for generations.” Lucas explained, wincing. 

Oh. “Ah.” He murmured and looked back down at his beer, frowning when Lucas got called away. Staving off disappointment, he turned his eyes back to the screen, hoping Lucas might decide to come back when he was done.

-

Lucas cursed under his breath as he realized Rodolfo had just ditched him. “I swear to God, Rudy, I’m going to fucking kick your ass if you don’t stop fucking my uncle and come back and fucking pick me up.” He hissed into the voicemail he was leaving.

He knew it was no use. Rodolfo and Alejandro were so fucking gross sometimes. He… wished he could blame them, though. Neither’s family approved of the other, so they rarely got time together, and he knew they were just trying to get whatever they could. Especially as both were Special Forces, now, so they apparently didn’t get much time while deployed, either. He wondered why Rudy bothered with a job while on leave.

Eventually, Rudy would probably be back so they could go home. In the meantime, he decided to just hang around the building and run back inside at the slightest threat. 

Sighing, he pushed his hair behind his ears, annoyed as it just fell back in front of his face. He couldn’t wait to go home and shower, exhausted. The only thoughts in his head were that of a hot shower and then falling asleep and not waking up until an hour before his shift the next day.

His eyes immediately drew to movement in the near distance, his heart picking up ever so slightly, before he recognized the alpha from earlier was right outside the front entrance, only just visible due to where Lucas was standing. He appeared to be lighting a cigarette and looking at his phone.

Lucas would admit, he’d found him intriguing. He hadn’t tried any shit Spanish on Lucas, and he’d been really nice conversation. Didn’t talk over him or even really try anything. He wished he’d been able to stick around and keep talking to him, but of course the back had him busy. He was front, he should have been staying in the front.

In a split second decision, he quickly walked to the alpha. “Hey!” He called, before making it to him. “You never told me your name?”

The alpha looked at him, clearly startled, before he was grinning. Lucas liked the way he smiled, it didn’t look rehearsed or like he was trying to be attractive. It was a real grin. “Phillip Graves. You can just call me Phil.”

Lucas flushed and then smiled, “Phil Graves? A bit on the nose…”

“I chose it.” He shrugged. “My real name is Phillip Shepherd. But… that’s not as cool. I changed it when I left home a bit ago.” Then, he winced, and looked down at the ground.

“Oh.” Lucas frowned. “I… I still live with my family. I know that Americans don’t feel the same towards family as we do.”

“No, we don’t. I… didn’t want to be associated with my father anymore.” Phil sighed. “I… don’t honestly know why I’m telling you this. I haven’t told anyone else.”

“That's okay. Me gusta ser especial.” Lucas smiled, trying not to giggle. He really did like being special, especially to alphas. He didn’t get much attention from them, so when he did, it was nice. Well… never from the ones he wanted. “I didn’t hurt your friend’s feelings, did I?” He asked, though he didn’t actually feel bad. He was trying to keep up conversation.

Phil snorted, “Braeden will be fine. Don’t worry.”

“Good.” Lucas feigned relief and then hummed. “So… where are you headed, now?”

“Probably back to our hotel. But… those plans could change at any moment.” He chuckled and looked at Lucas. 

Lucas immediately latched onto the opening, feigning disappointment. “My friend, Rudy… he ditched me for his boyfriend. So, unfortunately, I have no way home as he’s my ride.” Technically, Alejandro could be his ride but Rodolfo had banned him from driving. Lucas couldn’t drive.

Phil raised an eyebrow before chuckling. “I’d offer, but my friends took our car.”

“Damn.” Lucas pouted, though he was secretly pleased. After a moment’s hesitation, he carefully took Phil’s cigarette, taking a drag from it. He actually liked the taste, surprised to be met with a pleasant cherry flavor. “Cherry. One of my favorite flavors.”

Phil didn’t even seem that shocked by Lucas’s action, though his eyes did darken. “You know, I worry about leaving an omega by his lonesome. Wouldn’t want anyone to… take advantage of you.”

Lucas very much hoped Phil would. “I think Rudy left his car here. If you want to… keep me company until he returns.”

Phil grinned before gesturing, “lead the way.”

Lucas happily pulled from the cigarette again before taking Phil’s hand and pulling him to Rodolfo’s car. Once there, he climbed up onto the hood, keeping the cigarette. “Where are you from?” He asked.

Phil leaned against the hood, sticking his hands in his pockets. “Texas. Dallas, specifically. Though… right now, I’m a marine.”

Lucas blinked, quite surprised. “I… didn’t notice. Usually you guys show up in uniform. You also… have this way of standing.”

“I’m not that self important.” Phil laughed. “I know I’m plenty special without the uniform. I don’t think I need to rely on it to get attention.”

He definitely didn’t, he’d caught Lucas’s no problem. “I like how confident you are. But… you don’t seem arrogant.” He admitted, tilting his head. “At least… you’ve very good at hiding it. Some alphas come through and they’re so… so…” Fuck. What was the word? “Engreída. Ah… mierde. Like the… like the word for chicken?” Well, also other things, but Lucas didn’t want to embarrass himself.

“I’m assuming you mean cocky.” Phil chuckled and Lucas turned bright red. “No. I don’t want to be cocky, cocky gets you killed.”

Lucas definitely agreed. In Las Almas, you say the wrong thing to the wrong person, and they kill you with no hesitation, no remorse. Sometimes, in truly horrible ways. “You don’t seem… cocky.”

“I try not to be.” Phil shrugged. “I think… it’s important to know where one stands.”

“Your friend seemed to struggle with that.” Lucas said before he could stop himself, blushing. “That was mean, I’m sorry.”

“But accurate.” Phil laughed, throwing his head back a bit. “No, he’s cocky. Actually, you got the better end of it. He’s said worse.”

“I can’t imagine.” Lucas made a face. He didn’t like alphas like Braeden. Some of them acted so entitled to Lucas’s attention, to his time, just because they were tipping him. He’d rather work without pay than cater to them, but money made the world go round. “I prefer you.”

Phil seemed to pause before he almost appeared to blush. “I’m really glad.”

Lucas leaned forward to him, putting the cigarette to his lips and taking the last drag from it before slowly letting the smoke out, like he’d seen Rodolfo do to Alejandro a few times. “It’s cold.”

Phil tsked, softly, moving closer to Lucas. “We can’t have that, can we?” He shrugged off his jacket before wrapping it around Lucas, and Lucas just melted at the scent that surrounded him. Something floral that he didn’t quite recognize and cigarette smoke. 

He tossed the cigarette to the floor before touching Phil’s collar on his shirt, moving his eyes to look up at Phil through his lashes. “I don’t think it’s quite enough…” 

Phil chuckled, softly, moving to touch Lucas’s chin. His touch did funny things to Lucas’s stomach, causing it to flip and clench. Moments later, the alpha was leaning down and brushing his lips against Lucas’s, making Lucas’s heart flutter. “Did that help?”

Lucas pretended to think before pouting and shaking his head. “No… I do not think so.”

“Let me try harder, then.” 

Lucas just melted as he was properly kissed, turning to grasping Phil’s collar in hopes it might keep him from pulling away. Sadly, he still did, and Lucas had to put a lot of effort into not whining. “Did that help any?”

“No… It’s really cold, I think it’s going to take a lot to fix it.” Lucas fluttered his lashes up at Phil, pressing his legs together slightly. “If you don’t think you’re up to it-”

Phil laughed, loudly, and it was just the right amount of cocky. Perfect. “I’ve got it, sweetheart, don’t worry.”

Lucas grinned, victoriously, closing his eyes as Phil’s mouth found his neck, mouthing along it and biting lightly. It spread warmth and need through his skin, increasing as the alpha’s hand slipped under where his shirt was unbuttoned, feeling over his chest and lightly grasping at the soft bits.

Everywhere he touched, he spread goosebumps across Lucas’s skin, and he reveled in the feeling of it, opening his legs so Phil could move even closer. When Phil’s tongue traced over his collar bone, he couldn’t help whining softly. 

He moved a bit and shoved his hands up Phil’s shirt, feeling over his back, lightly running his nails down it and melting at the soft growl that earned him before the scent of alpha was pouring over him, soaking into his skin.

Finally, Phil’s hands moved to unbutton his shirt and then he was gently pushing Lucas to lay back, undoing Lucas’s jeans and tugging them down. Fingers found their way inside him and Lucas moaned, leaning his head back slightly. 

“You’re so slick…” Phil murmured and Lucas’s skin went dark red. “Tight too, I only have two fingers in and you’re pressing around me.”

Lucas went to respond, but the function was cut off as Phil pressed his fingers deeper inside him, able to reach his back wall with ease. He was opened up and then pulled down the hood, Phil managing to be especially talented by doing this while undoing his own jeans and pushing them down.

Lucas wiggled to make sure he was in a good position, reaching up and grabbing Phil’s arms before the alpha was pushing in. He wasn’t especially big, but Lucas was glad. Too big usually ended up hurting more than it felt good. He’d always preferred being full but not stretched to the limit of pain.

It was definitely a bit of stretch as Phil was still bigger than average, but he filled Lucas to the brim, leaving Lucas to melt against the hood and close his eyes, panting slightly. “Fuck..” Phil groaned, leaning down and putting his forehead on Lucas’s chest. “Fuck, you’re so fucking tight.”

Lucas couldn’t help the smallest bit of pride that he had at that, wrapping what bit of his legs that he could around Phil’s middle to keep him close. When the stretch was gone, Lucas rolled his hips against Phil’s, earning another soft growl. “Message received.” Phil chuckled before lifting back up, pulling out before very quickly thrusting back in. This left Lucas scrambling to clamp a hand over his mouth, not quite wanting anyone to hear.

Phil’s hand replaced his own, which Lucas was grateful for, and then Phil set an almost punishing pace, slow but sharp and hitting deeper and deeper. It had Lucas’s mind empty save for the sensation of cock and pleasure, and he cried into Phil’s hand with each especially hard thrust.

Phil’s mouth moved to his shoulder, likely to muffle his own curses and moans, and something about that had Lucas’s arousal only increasing tenfold. 

When Lucas felt his stomach clench with the need to release, he swatted away Phil’s hand so he could speak. “Knot me, I’m on…” Not wanting to struggle, he just shook his head, “the pill. Pill. I’m on it. No baby.” Fuck, his English wasn’t the best at the best of times, getting fucked definitely did not help.

Phil grunted an acknowledgement before his hand covered Lucas’s mouth again and he was speeding up his pace. Lucas felt every muscle in his body clench before Phil was slamming deep into him, his knot catching. The sensation threw Lucas over the edge and he cried into Phil’s hand as he came, arching his back to the point of cramping.

Then, as he came down, he made a pleased sound at Phil collapsing on top of him, lazily reaching up and petting his hair. “When do you go back to Texas?” 

“Tomorrow.” Phil sighed, lifting his head and looking up at Lucas. 

Lucas frowned but nodded. “Ah.” He put his head back, almost a little glad. He didn’t want to build anything with the alpha. His family would never approve and… well, he was young. He still wanted to flit around before quite settling. This was just a hookup. 

Phil put his head back on his chest, panting softly. “If I’m ever back in Mexico, I’ll hit you up.”

“Hit me up?”

“Find you.” 

“Ohhh…” Lucas laughed, softly, and then shrugged. “I don’t think I’ll mind.” He teased, since he definitely wouldn’t. 

Eventually, once Phil could, he pulled out and then he was a perfect gentleman, taking a tissue and cleaning Lucas up. He even helped Lucas get redressed before Rudy was finally reappearing, Alejandro in tow. “I should go.” Phil said and Lucas agreed. “I’d leave my number, but you said you don’t have international minutes.”

Lucas winced, since he hadn’t really been lying about that. “Sorry,” he smiled, apologetically.

“That’s okay. Have a good night.” Phil chuckled before he was jokingly bowing and leaving, right as Rudy and Alejandro made it to the car.

“Who was that?” Rudy asked, his expression curious but not judgemental. Alejandro did seem a little protective, but after getting told off by Lucas and Rodolfo, he’d seemed to curb that.

Lucas shrugged. “That gringo from before. With the ignorant friend? I told him I was nervous being out here, alone, so he stayed with me. Was a perfect gentleman, too.”

“Better have been.” Alejandro chuckled before sighing. “Come on, let’s go home. Rudy and I deploy, again, soon. So, I’m trying to get in as many late wakings as I can.”

All three laughed before they were heading home. 

-

A year passed, and Graves would be honest, he’d never quite gotten the omega out of his head. Yes, he’d hooked up with plenty of them, but something about Lucas had stuck with him. Maybe it was his eyes, which Graves had found haunting him at very inopportune times. That was… all of the time.

He’d done his best to ignore it, knowing that door was closed, but… when his next deployment had ended after only 9 months, it had been all too tempting to book a ticket directly to Mexico. Especially considering he was up for re-enlistment. 

He had no plans to not re-enlist, but he had maybe slowly gotten around to it. He could break the rules, because his father wanted him in the military, so he’d just call Dear Old Dad and get it fixed. Only thing that bastard was really good for.

But, he had managed to resist Mexico, instead working on the property he’d spent far too much money on. Family money, but… still. 100 acres, though he had plans to expand it, and it was in Louisiana, where his mother was from, so he felt more like he was at home.

Private, save for the contractors working on some of the rougher patches at the moment, and the gardeners he’d hired to take care of it when he did finally re-enlist. Maybe that was part of why he’d been thinking about Lucas. 

It was lonely.

He’d told himself that he’d wanted a little land to himself, wanting away from the stuffiness of other people, but… he was sorely wrong. It was rough waking up to a cold bed and nothing but silence surrounding him.

But, there were definitely benefits. He could do whatever he wanted, make whatever choices he chose to make. Ultimately, he didn’t regret the purchase. He told himself that, in time, he wouldn’t regret not going to Mexico, either, but… that was a bit harder to convince himself of.

Not with wide brown eyes haunting him around every corner. Muffled moans of his own name, the ghost sensation of skin, the scent of cinnamon and brown sugar syrup. It had flavored his coffee quite a few times, it was driving him crazy.

He awoke with a start to loud knocking on his front door. He awoke, as usual, to the sight of brown eyes in front of him, and he ran a hand down his face, leaning across the bed and grabbing his watch to check the time. 2:30… fuck.

Groaning, he dragged himself from the bed, muttering “yeah, yeah” under his breath when he heard the knocking again. It was almost drowned out by the sound of heavy rain, and he decided that if whoever this was didn’t have a good excuse, he was decking them.

Whoever they were.

When he finally made it to the door, he peeked through the peephole, frowning when he was met with a bit of a shorter individual, who had their hood up, though they were still completely soaked. They appeared to be holding some sort of bundle in their arms, which had him very wary to open the door.

Open it, he still did, rubbing over his face. “Can I help you?” He asked, sighing to make sure it was clear this was an inconvenience.

“I’m so sorry…” He recognized the voice almost instantly, of course he did. It had haunted his dreams and every waking moment between. “I… I didn’t know where else to go.” Lucas was standing right in front of him, clutching something very tightly to his chest under a clear plastic rain coat, and he sounded like he was almost sobbing. 

Graves didn’t hesitate to pull him inside, unable to speak from shock. Lucas, the very omega who he’d spent the last entire year obsessing over, was at his front door, soaked and sobbing. “How did you even find me?”

“It wasn’t easy…” Lucas laughed, softly, though it didn’t have any amusement in it, and he wiped his eyes, shifting the bundle as he did so, and causing a soft cry to come from it.

Dumbly, Graves would admit, he stared at the bundle as he closed the door, his mind perceiving but unwilling to process what it could possibly be. Of course, what else could it be?

Lucas looked down, gently rocking the bundle, and finally a little face appeared in it, eyes closed. “I’m… I’m sorry… I… You don’t have to take responsibility for her, I promise, if you tell me to leave, I will go, I’ll find somewhere else, but-”

“She’s mine?” Graves asked, cutting Lucas off. He was in autopilot, reaching his arms out and taking the baby as Lucas gave her to him. She was so little, almost concerningly little. Her skin was dark, like Lucas’s, but then she was waking from being moved and he was met with bright baby blue eyes…

“She’s yours… You were… the only one I slept with around that time. I… I’m willing to do a test to prove it.” Lucas’s voice was quiet. “I won’t ask for… support or anything, I promise…”

Phil’s heart melted as she looked right up at him, and he took a moment to do the math, figuring she had to only be about four months old. “She’s darling…” He murmured. “Why are you here?” He asked, gently, and turned to Lucas.

“My family… I managed to hide it by moving out, but then they found out after she came and… they were horrible. Cut off every resource I had…” Lucas’s eyes filled with tears, again, and he looked down at the floor. “I had no idea what else to do, I thought if I came here, maybe you could help… or… I don’t know.”

“I’ll help.” Phil said, not even needing to hesitate. “I… You’ll need citizenship to stay. We’ll get married.”

Lucas looked almost shocked, staring at him before he was breaking down into full sobs again, moving forward and hugging Phil, though he was careful not to crush the baby, Phil noticed. He said thanks in quite a few different ways, and Phil just shifted so he could hug him back, kissing his hair softly.

“I’m going to take care of you both. You can stay here while I’m deployed, I’ll make sure you have money.” Phil promised, carefully guiding him to the couch and sitting with him, before continuing to stare at the little child in his arms. “What’s her name?”

“I… named her Sofia.” Lucas murmured, reaching up and brushing aside some of her hair. “She’s four months old…”

“She’ll need diapers and food… Do you breastfeed?” Phil asked, though he did feel a little lost. He’d never really been around babies. He had no siblings, no cousins, no way to be around them. 

“I’m completely flat.” Lucas admitted, touching his chest. “Stress stopped that from… forming.”

“Ah.” Phil didn’t ask about the stress, able to take a few guesses. Sofia looked around the room, her eyes just as big and wide as Lucas’s, and already Phil loved her. He adored her, she was his daughter. “I don’t need a DNA test…” He murmured. “She’s mine.”

Lucas nodded, “she has your eyes…”

Phil laughed, softly, before bringing her up and kissing her forehead. “We’ll go furniture shopping tomorrow. I have an empty bedroom I haven’t done anything to, it can easily become a nursery.”

“Thank you…” Lucas sniffled and wiped his eyes, again. “I was so scared, I- I had nowhere, I had no one.”

“That’s alright. You don’t have to thank me, okay?” Phil shook his head and then looked back down at Sofia. “I’m… not just doing this because she’s my daughter. I have done nothing but think about you for the past year. So many times, I was so close to booking a flight directly to Mexico and tracking you down. I want you to stay with me.”

Lucas looked up at him, clearly surprised, and then he was melting. “Even without her, I think I would have been the same… I was never upset that you were the father.”

“I am so goddamn grateful for that.” Phil grinned. “Tomorrow, we’ll buy everything she needs, and I’ll talk to a friend who’s an ordained minister about putting together a small wedding. We’ll get everything sorted out for you to stay here. If… you want, we can even put you together a bedroom, or you can stay in mine. I’d… really like you to stay in mine.”

“I’ll stay in yours…” Lucas leaned into him, his eyelids drooping. “I walked here… Once I made it to the city, I walked until I found you.”

“Sleep.” Phil insisted, standing and pulling Lucas with him. He guided him to the bedroom and got one of his own shirts for him, so he could sleep in dry clothing, politely looking away and cooing to Sofia as he changed. “I’ll stay up with her so she can also sleep.”

Lucas looked too exhausted to protest, thankfully, and Phil moved to sit in an armchair he had in the corner of the room, watching the omega climb into bed, and chuckling when he almost instantly fell asleep. 

He couldn’t be too angry at this outcome, not when he shifted to touch Sofia’s nose, and she wrestled one of her arms free before grabbing his finger, giggling softly. “Princess…” He murmured, adoring her more and more. “You should sleep, too.”

Her wide eyes went back to looking around the room, though she still had that big smile on her face. Carefully, he scented her, knowing she’d likely know the scent of her father. It was genetics, though he admittedly didn’t know much about it. However, it seemed to be effective, as she rolled to curl closer to Phil, her eyes closing.

He unwrapped her fully from the bundle before gently wrapping one of the blankets back around her so she could be warm while she slept. She looked so much like Lucas, he was very glad for it. 

No, he wasn’t angry about this at all.

-

“Daddy?” Graves lifted his arm, seeing Sofia was standing in front of the couch, right next to his head. “Mami said you were going again, soon.”

“I am.” Graves confirmed. When he left the military a few years before, he hadn’t told Lucas. He hadn’t told him why, he hadn’t told him that he’d started his own PMC. Lucas was still soft, he was still sweet, and Graves did not want him to know what he did. What he did on his father’s command.

Sofia pouted and Graves chuckled, softly, gently picking her up and laying her on his chest before pulling down the throw blanket and laying it over both of them. She was still so small, though this likely had to do with Lucas already being small, and Graves being small for an alpha. “Why??”

“It’s my job, princess.” Graves explained, taking her stuffed kitten from her and making it dance across the back of the couch, hoping to distract her so she didn’t get too upset. He also hadn’t told Lucas that this time, he’d be going to Las Almas. He’d almost lost his mind when he found out that those lost missiles had ended up there, somehow. 

Small world. Too small.

Sofia pouted more. “I don’t like it…”

“I know, Princess. I’m sorry.” Graves murmured, leaning down to kiss her hair. “I wouldn’t go if I didn’t have to. But, it’s why our house is so big and why you can have any toy you want.”

“And why Mami can order dinner when he doesn’t feel like cooking.” Lucas came over to them both and Graves didn’t even hesitate to get out his wallet, getting out his card and holding it up. “Thank you, baby.”

Graves just snorted, unable to break Lucas of thanking him for everything. Sofia still didn’t look pleased, but she was no longer pouting. When Lucas left, she looked down at her hands, fidgeting with her fingers. “Mami cries when you’re gone. He misses you.”

Ouch. That put a spike of guilt right through Graves’ chest. “How about this, Princess. When I get back from this job, I’ll pull some strings to be back for a few months. We’ll take a vacation, to anywhere you want. Anywhere in the world.”

Sofia’s eyes got big and she put her head back fully to look up at Graves. “You mean that, Daddy?” Her eyes had never faded from that bright baby blue, and he’d grown quite the inability to tell them no. Of course… he had an inability to tell Lucas no, as well. 

“I do. Where would you want to go?” Graves gently made her put her head back to normal, worried about her neck, and he smoothed his hand over the twin braids that Lucas had put in her hair that morning. “We can go to England, France… Spain…” Not Mexico, not after what he was going to have to do. He hoped Lucas would forgive him if he ever found out. “Canada.”

“It’s cold in Canada.” Sofia giggled. “Ms Michaels says it’s cold even in the summer!”

“I’ve never been, so I wouldn’t know. But… I have heard it’s fairly cold.” Graves chuckled, giving her back her cat, finally. “Is Canada where you want to go?”

“I dunno.” She admitted, frowning.

Graves softened and then leaned down to kiss her hair, again. “Think about it, Princess. Wherever you want. When I come back, we’ll go there.”

“What about Disney World?” She looked up at him again.

Laughing, he nodded, “alright. If you want Disney World, we’ll go to Disney World. I think Mami has been wanting to go there, as well.”

“Ahhhhh!” She yelled, shaking her head and kicking her legs. Graves was careful to catch her legs, not wanting a repeat of her kicking him in places he very much would not like to be kicked in. 

When she calmed, she snuggled more into Graves, and he put his arms around her, closing his eyes and listening to Lucas order food in the other room, hearing a common order. Sometimes, he considered closing shop, retiring. He had more than enough money but…

His father would never let that happen. And, he liked his job. 

“Daddy?” 

Graves opened his eyes and looked down to meet hers, smiling. “Yes, Princess?”

“You’ll come home, right?” His heart broke at the little tears that had gathered in the corners of her eyes, and she looked so genuinely fearful that he almost immediately threw everything to the wind, called his father and told him to go fuck himself, and stayed home.

But he couldn’t do that. “I’ll come home, Sofia.” He murmured, touching her forehead. “I promise.”

“Pinky promise?” She held up her pinky and he couldn’t help laughing softly before linking pinkies with her.

“I pinky promise.”

-

Phillip Graves stared at the inside of a tank, knowing he didn’t have time for this. He was being hunted, and his pursuers were far too clever. “I’m not going in, Oz.” He said into his comms. 

Oz was halfway across the world as of that moment, but he’d still helped them by hacking everything he could on base. “What do you mean, boss?”

“Oz, I get in that tank, I’m not getting back out.” He climbed down from the tank, running a hand over his face. He could hear the explosions and gunshots outside, becoming more and more chaotic, louder and louder, and he was running out of fucking time. 

Oz didn’t respond for a moment, before finally, “I can hack the tank, control it remotely. If you put a body in it, I doubt they’d even check to see if it’s you. Then, you can talk as if you’re in the tank, and lead them astray.”

“Thanks to those animals tearing up my men, a body shouldn’t be too hard to come across.” Phil muttered, very easily finding one as he predicted. He knew the first and last name of the alpha, he knew his kids’ names, he knew the name of the omega he’d married. For a moment, he considered getting in the tank, anyway. 

But, no, he couldn’t. It was selfish, it was wrong, and he knew he’d justify it later by claiming Shadow Company needed a leader, but no. He was being selfish, he was being wrong, and he didn’t fucking care. He’d never ever claimed to be a good man, and he wouldn’t claim that now. 

He stuffed the body in the tank and then sealed it. “Buy me time with it, Oz. Feed my comms to it, and I’ll talk while I leave. Can you get me a helo or a vehicle or something?”

“I’ll call Mila.”

“Do that.” Graves relaxed and then he backed away from the tank, cursing as he heard an explosion come from the doors. He needed to go, now. “I’m going home, Oz.”

“Not that I blame you, can I ask why, sir?”

“I pinky promised.”

--

Anyway, I'm more than willing to write that follow up with Liliana we joked about, if you still want it, @alexkellersgymshorts

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[bongwater777]

i am curious about your headcanons for the terrible husbands (volgin & his bitch raikov)

oh BOY where do i even start... i'm taking this as an opportunity to dump most of my made up lore here so there's a lot to unpack, i'm just going to put this all under the cut

Raikov

-Raikov grew up in poverty, his parents both died before he even turned 12 years old

-he was moved to an orphanage run by the state government, which was barely able to feed its citizens let alone the children of the orphanage

-He often had to resort to digging through street garbage and trash cans for food, which often left his hands scarred and infected, since he couldn’t treat them

-He joined the military as soon as he became of age and quickly became a star in hand-to-hand combat. He became the most skilled soldier in his unit, causing him to rise in the ranks over the next few years. However, this talent came only as a result of a growing resentment for his fellow soldiers and superiors, who often used hazing and harassment against him

-Due to his excessively scarred hands he always wears a pair of gloves to hide them

-At the point of meeting Volgin, he has long repressed his childhood memories and has already turned his gloves into a routine that he doesn’t think about it anymore. However, when the relationship begins getting intimate past the point of sex, Volgin tells him he doesn’t have to be a soldier around him all the time.

From that, Raikov’s guard comes down and the memories start coming back, causing strong flashbacks that result in him going into severe panic attacks. Volgin acted as his support through these moments, and eventually, he decided to give something to Raikov to help him in those times of distress

-Raikov has two pet frogs which Volgin absolutely hates (their names are Valya and Vaska)

-He was highly influenced by Volgin to become sadistic like him

-After Volgin “dies”, Raikov's trauma resurfaces in very irregular patterns, ranging in intensity over the next few years after his “death” before eventually turning inwards, where he no longer has a physical reaction and only gets stuck in memory loops

-He becomes extremely depressed in the following years and picks up smoking as a coping mechanism

-After being freed from his jail sentence he ends up staying with the military for 13 more years as he has nowhere else to go

Volgin

-Volgin was born into a military family with a very strict father

-When he was really young he had a very close relationship with his mother, who taught him what it meant to be human and have emotion

-Volgin's father, Boris, was a man driven by success and the goals of the Philosophers, and he did whatever it took to make sure he got the results he sought. One day, Boris has his wife kidnapped and sent away to a distant part of Russia far away from Volgin. Of course, Volgin didn’t know of any of this and only knew that his mother suddenly disappeared from his life

-After this incident, Volgin was raised to be a soldier, being taught that emotion was a sign of weakness and that he should eliminate every emotion except hate and anger from his soul, which goes against everything his mother taught

-Volgin held immense hatred for his father throughout his childhood but eventually as he grew, this hatred was pushed into his subconscious, and he no longer felt hate towards his father as he then began to see the “true” nature of the world.

-He made it a goal to drive himself to the top, eventually taking up boxing and becoming a national champion

-In time, Volgin would eventually become a military man and rise through the ranks, still driven by that same idea his father planted in him long ago

-While he was in the military, he blindly participated in some tests involving the very first nanomachine prototypes, which, when injected, caused him to gain more muscle mass and grow in stature. However, these did not cause anything else to happen in him like the scientists had hoped, so they deemed the experiment a failure and let Volgin go as they didn’t see any reason to extract the prototypes

-At some point in his early 40's, Volgin discovers that his mother did not die as his father originally told him, so he sets out to find her only to discover her on her death bed and spending mere minutes with her until her passing

-During a lightning storm in the town where his mom died, he gets struck by lightning on the left side of his face, This was the catalyst that activated the prototype nanomachines and gave him his electrical powers

-After suffering an immense amount of pain, Volgin remembers what his mother said before her passing, which was that it was his father that took her away from him. After this realization, a new fire of hatred ignites for his father

-Volgin travels back to his father and beats him to death with his newfound power, making sure that his father is reminded of the pain he inflicted on Volgin as a child. After this, Volgin’s mind is destroyed to the point where the only option left is to drive towards success and fulfill his political philosophies. He then discovers that his father was hiding the Philosophers’ Legacy, which he stole and later used to construct Groznyj Grad and start making his plan to overthrown Khruschev.

-When Raikov entered his life, he started to see a small glimpse of light in his darkened soul, and started coming back to the ground. He made Raikov his lover and anchor to reality, and over time, he came to trust Raikov with all of his secrets, even telling him about the trauma he suffered as a child that he cannot let go of. Despite him still being reluctant with his emotions, he was starting to open up.

Despite having this outlet, however, this fixation on success drove him to his “death” at the end of MGS3

(the following is a part of my AU for MGSV)

When he re-encounters Raikov in 1984, he experiences a sudden awakening that sends him back to his childhood, back to when things were happy and he could enjoy the life he was given from his mother. His eyes were opened to the trauma he experienced, realizing that he never wanted to chase after success or revenge, but only to live a happy life away from anything his father wanted. He saw that his father raised him to be a soldier, not a human, and knew deep in his subconscious that this was not what he wanted.

This is what brings Volgin out of his demonic state in MGSV, reclaiming his humanity and bringing him back to Raikov, allowing him to pursue the life he always wanted.

Volgin continues to struggle with his emotions, but after his awakening, he is more willing to explore his emotions and unpack what happened in his childhood, which leads to him becoming more happy

Their relationship

-Raikov met Volgin in the military a couple years before MGS3, Volgin was the first to take interest and the two quickly grew closer

-Volgin gifted Raikov a teddy bear at the beginning of their relationship which has a lot of sentimental value to Raikov

-Volgin is typically a power-hungry sadist towards everyone else, but towards Raikov he is a completely different man, he will do quite literally anything to make him happy and keep him safe. Raikov is the only person he truly loves

-they are highly dependent on each other

-despite all this they live in a fairly open relationship, both having sexual relations with other people (Raikov sometimes gets jealous)

-later on in my AU, once they finally reunite in 1984 they decide to settle down and live together far away from society somewhere in the woods, they also end up adopting Tretij as their son

(there's more to this but i'll make a separate post focusing on the AU if people wanna know more about it, i have a comic focusing on this AU too that i should get around to posting tbh)

[masterofmunson]

look after you (1)

TFATWS Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

Summary: Sam asks you to join him and Bucky on a mission in Madripoor. When you get injured, Bucky feels the need to remind you more than once that he’s supposed to look after you now that Steve’s gone.

Warnings: tfatws spoilers, language, violence, blood, grief, angst, major pining

Word Count: 6k+ 

Author’s Note: Here she is!! I’m really excited to see what you guys think! This is my first Bucky fic in AGES! I decided to make this into a mini series since this fic is so long haha. Please let me know what you think. Comments, reblogs, and asks are highly encouraged and appreciated! Enjoy!

You hadn’t seen Sam or Bucky in several weeks. You were still adjusting to life post-blip. It had been a long five years for you and just seconds for them. You were no longer the bright-eyed and bushy tailed recruit. You’d grown into your position amongst the established and experienced Avengers. Now, it meant nothing. 

Tony’s gone. Steve’s dead, Natasha too. The Avengers had officially disbanded. You felt lost and confused, still blinded by your grief over losing them. You had nowhere to go, so you just floated from place to place as needed. 

You were laying low and a shell of the person you once were. You had no one to look towards anymore. Bucky went his separate ways and got some sort of footing in New York City with the pardon he was given by the government since his return to the states. You checked in every now and then with him, but you didn’t want to slow down his progress so you distanced yourself from him. 

You know he feels some sort of responsibility towards you. Steve did too, and you suppose now that he’s gone, Bucky feels the need to take his place. It doesn’t matter that you’re no longer the naive 23 year old he met in Berlin all those years ago. It doesn’t matter that there was something lingering between the two of you before he turned to ash. You’re a grown woman now and war and politics has hardened your soul. 

He needs to move on from you. The version he has of you in his head is gone, dead. He wants a fresh start, and you can’t give it to him. 

Sam checks in with you once in a while. He asks you how you’re doing and you respond the same each time. “Same shit, different day,” you laughed lightly. 

He knows better than to ask you to join him on his missions with the military. You’re not in the right headspace to return to the field, least of all if it meant that you were representing the US government wherever the fight was. 

Now that John Walker has the shield and has been branded the new Captain America, it gives you all the more reason to stay away. If he had so much as just breathed in your direction, you’d kill him and rip the shield from his grasp and return it to Sam. 

You ignored all emails and phone calls that had to do with John Walker. He wanted your blessing on live television, as if that meant anything. Yes, you were close with Steve, but you’re not an original Avenger. You just caught his eye during training one day and he took you under his wing. John Walker just wanted to create a bridge between the two of you since Sam and Bucky were obviously out of the question. 

You were the first person Sam called when he told you he was giving up the shield. You didn’t ask why. You knew he had his reasons and you respected him to accept that whatever the reasons were, they were good enough. 

So, when Sam called in the middle of the night, you picked up the phone without a second thought. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you sit up and fumble for the light on the nightstand beside you. 

“Sam? You do realize it’s three in the morning, right?” you asked, yawning into your phone. 

Sam curses in your ear and apologizes quietly. “Sorry. You would think with all this traveling, I’d remember time zones are a thing,” he laughed softly. 

“What is it, Sam?” 

“We’re in a bit of a tight spot. We could use your help.”

Your brows pinch together. “Who’s we, Sam?”

“Me and Barnes.”

Your heart jumps inside your throat. How the hell did Sam manage to rope Bucky into whatever he’s doing? The last you heard, Bucky wasn’t allowed to go on government missions until his therapist thought he made enough progress to do so. You know he’s nowhere near the progress he wants to be, so how is he with Sam? 

“Jesus, Sam. You know he’s not in the right headspace to go on missions!” There’s a heavy pause between the two of you before you relent. “Where am I meeting you?”

“Latvia. I’ll fill you in when you get here.”

You hang up quickly and hurry out of bed. After so many years of getting up at odd hours for emergency missions and the like, you’re not surprised that Sam asked you to meet him in the middle of the night. You grab your duffle bag and stuff all your belongings back inside. You travel lightly, and now it definitely seemed to work out in your favor. 

You’ve spent the last couple of weeks in a small town just outside of Helena, Montana. It’s nice and quiet and you’ve really taken the time to reflect on your life since things started going back to normal post-blip. The locals are nice and hospitable, and no one asks you about Steve, Tony, or what you thought of John Walker. You hope it had something to do with the fact that they didn’t know who you were. You certainly hoped that was the case. You’ve kept your head down and tried your best to blend in. 

You go hiking quite frequently and take drives through the mountains. It’s nice and relaxing, a far cry from what you’re used to. You’ll definitely miss it, and you have second thoughts about meeting up with Sam, but you push them away. Steve abandoned you both, and you wouldn’t do that to him. 

It takes you several hours to get to the closest international airport and by the time you arrive, the sun begins to rise in the distance. You hurry through the airport security and send Sam a quick update that you’re about to board your flight before you settle in your seat and fall back asleep.

....

You sleep through the entire flight. You blame it on your ability to sleep anywhere due to the number of missions you have under your belt. You’re wide awake when the plane lands and you’re quick to pull out your phone and send a message to Sam that you’ve made it safe and sound to Latvia. 

Your legs are stiff and sore when you stand up for the first time when it’s time to leave. You pull your duffle bag from the overhead compartment and slowly make your way to the front. It takes you nearly an hour to get through customs and now you’re just anxiously waiting to see Sam. 

When you see him waiting for you at the baggage claim area, you grin as your eyes meet. You hurry over to him and drop your duffle bag to the floor as he pulls you in for a hug. It’s warm and tight and it’s exactly what you need. Sam pulls away first and reaches for your bag, throwing an arm over your shoulder as you walk out of the airport to his car. 

You stop walking when you notice two figures near a very fancy yellow car as you and Sam near them. Sam keeps walking and you take slow, tentative steps. You know one of the figures has to be Bucky, but Sam never mentioned a third person. 

“Sam, I thought you said that it was just you and Bucky,” you said cautiously. 

Sam stops in his tracks and lets out a nervous chuckle and scratches the back of his head. It makes your heart race and you swallow the lump in your throat as they begin to come into focus as they near the two of you. “Y/n, before you get angry, I just need you to know that this wasn’t my idea. Believe me when I tell you that he is the last person we would ask for help,” Sam replied as his eyes went from you to the two people approaching.

“Who is he?” you asked through gritted teeth. 

“Ah! Y/n, good to know that your flight went rather smoothly. It is good to see you again.”

No. There’s no way. You must be dreaming. Hemlut Zemo is not standing right in front of you. He is in prison. He is behind bars for the crimes he committed. The two men that you're closest to wouldn’t jailbreak someone as atrocious as Zemo. There has to be an explanation. It doesn’t make sense. 

“What the fuck is Zemo doing out of prison?!” you hissed, looking between Bucky and Sam, demanding an explanation. 

“Y/n, honey, I can explain, just please get in the car,” Bucky pleaded, reaching out to touch your hand. 

You glare at him and take a step back. “Are you out of your mind, Bucky? You break him out of jail because you need him, is that it? Do you remember what he did to you, because I certainly do!”

Bucky frowns and lets out a deep and heavy sigh. He looks over at Sam. “Did you fill her in at all?”

“No!” you shouted. “I can speak for myself, James! Someone better start talking and tell me what the hell is going on!”

“We don’t really have time for this right now,” Zemo interrupts, “we really must be going. I’m sure Sam and James can fill you in in the car.”

You glare at the Sokovian terrorist and snap at him. “Shut your mouth, Zemo.”

He raises his hands up in surrender and takes a step back. Bucky towers over you and this time you let him take your hand. He squeezes it gently and pulls you into his chest, hugging you tightly. You’re tense and fuming as he holds you. 

His mouth finds the shell of your ear and despite the wave of anger flowing through your body, it sends a shiver down your spine. Bucky whispers, “I hate to say it, but Zemo’s right. We have to go. I’ll explain on the way, I promise.”

You huff childishly and turn your head away from him as he kisses your temple. “Fine. If he steps out of line, I’ll kill him.”

Bucky laughs and takes your hand and walks you to the car. “Get in line, honey. Sam and I have first dibs.”

You resist the urge to smile and Bucky opens the door for you as Sam tosses your bag in the trunk and climbs into the front seat. Bucky slides in beside you and he tells you everything.

He tells you about their first encounter with the Flag Smashers. He tells you about how the leader and a few of her followers have taken a newer version of the serum that runs through his veins. He tells you that she plans on giving the serum to more people to build an army and that you have to stop her. 

It makes your heart stop. You hadn’t really been keeping tabs on the Flag Smashers. Now, looking back, you probably should have. There’s still a lot of unknown variables to account for and it looks like the boys are taking it one step at a time, and apparently it starts with a trip to Madripoor. Zemo chimes in every now and then as he drives and it makes your blood boil that you’re forced to listen to what he has to say. You hate that he has the upper hand and is keeping valuable information hostage. You want to strangle him. 

After a while, Zemo pulls into a private airport. Bucky helps you out of the car and grabs your bag from the trunk as the four of you walk towards the jet just off the runway. You had no idea just how rich Zemo was. Now that he’s out of prison, for now at least, his arrogance returned back in full force in addition to his pompous attitude. 

You board the plane in silence, ignoring every word coming out of the Baron’s mouth. You settle in the back of the plane and ignore Bucky’s stares as you look out the window. You’re too angry to engage in conversation. You don’t care that Zemo insults Steve’s legacy. He’s gone, dead, what do you care? Yes, you wanted Steve to be happy, but he abandoned you. He abandoned Sam and Bucky. 

Zemo rambles on and on. “People like Steve become symbols, icons. Then we start to forget about their flaws. From there, cities fly, innocent people die. Movements are formed, wars are fought,” he turns to address Bucky directly. “You remember that, right? As a young soldier sent to Germany to stop a mad icon. Do we want to live in a world full of people like the Red Skull?”

Silence fills the space and for a moment, you feel a reprieve. That was until Zemo mentioned the Winter Soldier. 

 “We can’t go into Madripoor as ourselves. James, you will have to become someone you claim is gone.”

You immediately stand up and protest, storming to the front of the plane. “No. Absolutely not. I won’t let you use Bucky, not again. There has to be another way.”

Zemo clicks his tongue at you and shakes his head. A smug graces his features and you lung at him, wrapping your hands around his throat. “I’ll fucking kill you!”

Bucky leaps to his feet and tears you off of Zemo, dragging you to the back of the plane behind the curtains to give the two of you an illusion of privacy. Your shoulders shake with rage and Bucky’s hands caress your face. 

“You can’t be him. He’s not you anymore. You don’t have to do this, Bucky. Please,” you begged, clinging to his hands. “I can’t let Zemo control you again.”

Bucky’s touched with how protective you are over him. He pulls you closer and hugs you tightly against him. Your fingers grip the back of his shirt and he presses a gentle kiss to the top of your head. 

“Honey,” he whispered. “I have to. I have to do this so we can stop the Flag Smashers from getting the serum. It’s for the mission.”

You huffed against his chest. Now you’re really regretting your decision to help Sam. You would’ve said no if you had known that it meant watching Bucky turn into the Winter Soldier again, even if it wasn’t real. 

You don’t know what to say. He won’t change his mind. Bucky’s just as stubborn as you are and he’ll do anything for the success of the mission, just like Steve did. 

You pull away and return back to your seat, crossing your arms over your chest as you stare into the back of Zemo’s plush leather seat. Bucky trails behind you and squeezes your shoulder. You shrug off his touch as he takes the empty seat next to yours. 

“And, I’m afraid that where we’re going doesn’t take too kindly to women who are…. how do I put this…. strong willed,” Zemo said. 

“What is that supposed to mean?” Bucky barked, jumping to your defense just moments after you did the same for him.

“Selby will see Y/n as competition. We can’t have that happen. She’ll have to stay behind.”

“You’re out of your mind if you think I’m just going to just sit here and do nothing,” you snapped. “I’m coming with. I don’t care if I have to pretend to be meek.”

Zemo turns to look at you. He’s challenging you. You both know it. He’s pushing your buttons and it’s working. He smirks and leans against the armchair. His eyebrows raise and he asks, “Even if it means pretending to be a prostitute?”

Your gaze doesn’t falter and you ignore both Sam’s and Bucky’s protests. It falls on deaf ears. You don’t care, as long as you’re with Sam and Bucky and they’re safe. “Yes,” you answered without a second thought. You’ve done worse things than pretend to be a sex worker. It would be a piece of cake. 

Zemo grins, letting out a soft laugh. “It looks like you’ll be joining us after all then, Y/n.”

You scoff at him and look out the window. Bucky drags you from your seat once more and pulls you behind the curtain. You look away from him and he reaches to squeeze your hand. 

“You don’t have to do this. You have nothing to prove,” he whispered, brushing the top of your palm with his warm and calloused fingers. 

“You don’t either,” you mumbled back. 

He smiles softly at your retort and pulls you into his arms. He holds you gently and cards his fingers through your hair. You hum quietly as he holds you. 

“Touché, honey.”

There’s a beat of silence between the two of you before you lean back to meet his gaze. His blue eyes pierce through yours and it makes your heart race. You pull away and rub your palms against your thighs. 

You disappear behind the curtain once more, leaving Bucky behind. 

…

When you arrive in Madripoor, you’re dressed in an outfit that leaves little to the imagination. The dress has a plunging neckline that settles just below your naval. Your chest is barely covered and your boobs threaten to slip over the fabric. You’re dressed for the part, that’s for sure. 

Zemo is the first one to look at you when you return from behind the curtain. He whistles at you and it makes your skin crawl. 

Bucky shoves Zemo harshly and grips his chest tightly, snarling in his face. “Watch your mouth,” Bucky hissed, shoving him into one of the chairs. 

He turns to look at you and you reach to squeeze his hand. You pull him away from Zemo and whisper softly, “It’s alright, Buck. Take a deep breath.”

He grits his teeth and shakes his head, and does what you ask. “I’ll kill him. If he does that again, I’ll kill him.”

You laugh softly and press a gentle kiss to his cheek. “I don’t doubt you will, Buck.”

The two of you trail behind Sam and Zemo as you leave the plane. A sleek black car is waiting just off the runway and you follow behind to the vehicle. When you settle into your spot in between Buck and Sam in the back, Zemo turns to look at the three of you. 

“It’s imperative that we don’t break character, no matter what. If you do, we’re good as dead, understand?” 

You scoff and roll your eyes as he looks towards you. “Crystal,” you snapped, crossing your arms over your chest. 

He turns to face the front of the vehicle and silence fills the car. 

Suddenly, a number of motorcycles surround the car as you drive into Low Town. you make sure to keep your eyes forward and Bucky reaches for the hand on your knee. He squeezes it tightly and you do the same. 

Reality is now just setting in for you. This is the first mission that you’ve been on since Steve went back to the 40s, and since Tony died. It had been three long months since Tony saved the world and brought everyone back that was taken five years earlier. You know that three months isn’t long, but it still makes you nervous. You haven’t been training to keep things from going rusty. You had no desire to. 

Bucky leans into you, his mouth near the shell of your ear. “You okay?” 

You nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. “Yeah, just a bit nervous. I’m a little out of practice. This is my first mission since Steve left,” you mumbled back, squeezing his hand again to keep you grounded. He does the same in return. 

“It’s alright. I have your back. I’ll protect you, promise.”

A small smile finds its way onto your face and you shake your head at him. “You know better than anyone else than to promise something like that before a mission, Buck. It’s bad luck,” you teased. 

He laughs too and the car stops in what you guess is the downtown area of Low Town. You take a deep breath and Bucky does the same. You squeeze his hand one last time before his hand falls from your grasp. He opens the door and climbs out. You follow close behind and find your spot next to Sam. He gingerly wraps his arm around your waist as you walk into the Princess Bar. 

Electronic music blasts through the speakers and the bass vibrates through your chest. You press against Sam as you push through people to get to the bar. The smell of drugs and alcohol is suffocating as you walk and ignore the stares sent your way. They’re not staring at you, but Bucky, who walks just a step behind you like a looming shadow. 

“Ready to comply, Winter Soldier?” Zemo asked Bucky in Russian. 

It makes your blood boil and Sam squeezes your waist tightly, a reminder that you must not break character. You hate it. You hate that Bucky has to pretend to be the person he’s worked so hard to distance himself from. Bucky is not him. The Winter Soldier doesn’t exist anymore. That part of him is gone, dead. You only hope that Bucky reminds himself that the Winter Soldier isn’t him anymore as he pretends just feet behind you.

You stand in front of the bar counter as the bartender approaches. You keep your mouth shut as Zemo exchanges words with the man, briefly bringing Sam, the Smiling Tiger, into the conversation. Your eyes find Bucky’s and your heart jumps inside your throat. His eyes are cold and void of any emotion. He’s stoic and brooding. He’s fallen into character perfectly and it scares you to think that all the progress he’s made over the years has been destroyed in this moment. For his sake, you hope not.

You tear your eyes away from Bucky at the feeling of Sam’s hand on the curve of your ass. You watch him carefully as he takes a shot. The bartender moves on and you let out a careful breath. 

A man grasps at Zemo’s shoulder and sneers at him. He looks over at Bucky as Zemo asks to see Selby before he walks away. Another man approaches Zemo from behind and he speaks in Russian once more. “Winter Soldier, attack.” 

You hold your breath in anticipation as the unsuspecting man rests his hand on Zemo’s shoulder. You want to reach out and touch Bucky, tell him that he doesn’t have to, that the two of you still have time to make a run for it, but you don’t. You can’t. Zemo would probably try and kill you if you interfere and it’s the last thing you need. 

Bucky stalks over to him with two long strides, and rips the man’s hand from Zemo’s shoulder. He twists his wrist back and throws him to the ground. Another man swings at Bucky and he stops it with ease. He punches his back and kicks him against another crowny. As another man attempts to punch and kick at Bucky. He uses his metal arm and momentum to take each of them out.

“It doesn’t take much for him to fall back into form,” Zemo smirked, leaning over to look at you and Sam. 

“Shut your mouth,” you hissed between your teeth as you watched Bucky. 

Bucky grabs one of the men by the throat and slams him into the counter. Guns cock all around you as you look around the room. Your heart is inside your throat and there’s ringing in your ears. You reach to grab Bucky’s arm, but Sam beats you to it.

“Stay in character or the whole bar turns on us,” Zemo whispered. “Well done, soldier.”

Sam lets go of his arm and takes a step back, pulling you with him. He squeezes your hip tightly as you watch Bucky’s grip fall from the man’s throat.

“Selby will see you now,” the bartender said.

Zemo moves to follow him and you resist the urge to reach out and touch Bucky. Sam pulls you along and you walk in silence down a number of hallways. The music fades into the background and you’re squeezing Sam’s hand like your life depends on it. 

A number of men on Selby’s security detail whistle as you walk by. You bite your tongue and resist the urge to snap their necks. The four of you wait at the door at the end of the hall for several seconds before it opens. You walk inside and Zemo takes you from Sam’s side. Your jaw ticks as he guides you to the empty sofa. His hand settles on your thigh and you tense under his touch.

Zemo and Selby negotiate for information. All you need to know is who created the serum and where they are. That’s it. Zemo needs to stick to the plan. 

Zemo stands up from his spot next to you. “Tell us what you know about the super soldier serum, and I give you him…. along with the code words to control him,” Zemo stands behind Bucky, his hand resting on his shoulder. He’s silent and obedient, the perfect encapsulation of who he had been for the last 80 years. 

There wasn’t a discussion over what the offer would be when you were on the plane from Latvia. You just assumed Zemo would figure a way out of it, he was clever enough to do it before. You hadn’t thought that he would actually use the Winter Soldier to his benefit outside of protection. How naive of you. 

Bucky’s eyes are dark and he stares straight ahead as Zemo caresses his chin. He doesn’t flinch or react. He’s playing the Winter Soldier perfectly and you hate every second. You bite the inside of your cheek so hard that you start to taste blood. 

“He will do anything you want.”

Selby grins, leaning back in her spot on the couch opposite of you. She tells him what you need to know. She nears Sam and then the worst happens, his phone begins to ring. 

She tells him to answer it and your fingers squeeze into the leather couch. Your heart races and for the first time since you walked into the bar, Bucky’s eyes find yours. You know he can see your panic. 

Things are fine momentarily. Sam’s trying his best to stay in character and you know it’s not working as well as he’d like. You hold your breath and your panic settles in at the mention of Sam’s name coming from Sarah. 

“Kill them—” 

Your eyes widen in horror as a bullet pierces through the glass window in front of you and lodges into Selby’s throat, killing her instantly. The act is over. 

You leap to your feet and pull the tactical knife that you hid in your dress out from underneath you. You slice the knife across your attacker’s arm. Bucky kicks him into the wall and grabs you by the arm. 

You run as fast as you can out the bar and through the streets of Madripoor. You dodge bullets and fight off others that attack you with knives. 

You do well, all things considered with what you’re dressed in. You dig your heel into the boot of your attacker, throwing them off balance. You kick their leg out from underneath them and Sam knocks them unconscious. 

Bucky, of course, is doing just fine on his own. You run over to help. You disarm the man closer to you and use the butt of the gun to knock him out. 

You barely have time to register the man creeping up behind Bucky. His arm is outstretched with a gun in his hand. Bucky has no clue. 

“Bucky!” you screamed at the top of your lungs, running as fast as you can towards him. 

He turns to look at you as you use your whole body to shove him aside as the gun goes off. 

Time stands still. 

You fall to the ground in a daze as the bullet rips through your shoulder. Your eyes stare up into the night sky as it takes you a moment to realize that you’d just been shot. 

You try to sit up and get back on your feet. You don’t have time to worry about your wound. You need to get the hell out of Low Town. 

Bucky nearly drags you off the ground and you run. You run as fast as you can despite the bullet in your shoulder. 

“We need to get out of here!” Bucky shouted, inspecting your wound. 

A shadowy figure approaches and Bucky blocks you from view. The hood drops and you peer over Bucky’s shoulder. You don’t have time to be surprised that Sharon is the one standing in front of you. 

“Sharon? What are you doing here?” Sam asked. 

“We don’t have time for that!” Bucky snapped. “Sharon, please. You gotta help us. Y/n’s been shot.”

She nods and motions for you to follow her. She stops in front of a beautiful blue car and Bucky guides you into the car, pressing his metal hand against your shoulder to stop the bleeding. You ignore Sam and Bucky’s bickering as they yell at you for getting shot. You don’t have the energy to respond. 

Sharon races across town and pulls up to a very fancy building. Sharon jumps out and opens the door for Bucky. His arm holds your torso and your uninjured arm is thrown over his shoulder as you walk inside. You gather into the elevator as it takes you to the top floor. 

Your entire body goes numb and Bucky guides you to the kitchen counter. Sharon briefly disappears before returning with a heavy duty first aid kit. 

“Do you have tequila?” you asked her as Bucky rummaged through the bag for the correct supplies. Sharon laughs softly before grabbing a bottle of tequila from her liquor cabinet. You take a generous sip and the liquid burns your throat. 

Bucky inspects the bullet wound carefully. Thankfully it was a through and through. He doesn’t have to fish the bullet out. He works quickly and you grit your teeth as he stitches the wound close on both sides of your shoulder. 

The pain lessened to a dull throb now that he’s finished. He cleans the excess blood off your skin before gently placing your arm in a sling. 

“Why did you do that, Y/n?” Bucky chastised you, shaking his head in disappointment. “I could’ve taken care of him.”

You scoff and roll your eyes at him. “I don’t even get a thank you for saving your ass? You were vulnerable, I did the right thing.”

He sighs and you look away. Your eyes find Sharon’s. “Can I borrow some clothes?”

She nods and disappears down the hall to her bedroom. Silence fills the room and Sam takes his turn to reprimand you. You ignore him entirely and take another large swig of tequila. 

Sharon returns moments later with a pair of clean clothes. You thank her quietly and she points you in the direction of one of the guest bedrooms. You hop off the counter and ignore Bucky’s protests and calls of your name. 

You huffed in frustration as you limped towards one of Sharon’s guest bedrooms. You had enough of Sam and Bucky yelling at you for your recklessness, especially Bucky. You’re exhausted and all you want to do is sleep. 

You did what you thought was right. You did what Steve would’ve done. You had Bucky’s back. Isn’t that what mattered? Sure, you got shot in the shoulder, but it isn’t something you haven’t done before. You have the scars to prove it. 

“Stop running away from me! We’re not done talking about this!” Bucky yelled after you, hot on your heels into the bedroom. “What were you thinking?”

You’re sick of Bucky questioning you. You’re not a child and you’re not the bright eyed recruit he thinks you still are. You did what was right in the heat of the moment. You don’t regret it. You’d do it all over again if it meant that he was safe. 

“Stop treating me like a child, James! I’m not Steve’s recruit anymore! I’m a grown woman,” you shouted back at him. Your shoulders shake and you glare at him. “I know you still think I’m that naive 25 year old, but that’s not me anymore. The last five years may have been five seconds to you, but they weren’t to me. Accept the fact that I did what I thought was right.”

“It was reckless!”

“Steve would’ve done it!” you bit back. 

“This isn’t about Steve!” he argued. 

You laugh bitterly and shake your head. He doesn’t see it. He doesn’t see what you see. You know he sees you as his responsibility now that Steve’s gone. He feels an obligation to look after you because Steve did. You have a part of Steve with you. Bucky’s clinging to any last remains of Steve, and that includes you. 

“Isn’t it though? You feel like you have a responsibility to protect me, to look after me. Why? It’s because Steve did and now that he’s gone, you feel like you have to replace him!”

The silence that fills the room suffocates you. Your heart races with anger. You want Bucky to leave you alone. You didn’t ask for this. Sam needed your help, and when you provided it, you got yelled at for it. Now you just want to go home. 

You turn your back to Bucky and pull the pants that Sharon gave you up your legs before discarding the dress in the corner of the room. You don’t care if Bucky sees all the scars that litter your backside. Maybe then he would understand that you’ve always done what’s best for the mission, even if that meant getting hurt. You throw the sweatshirt over your head and turn to look at Bucky again. 

“Do you have anything else to say to me? Are you going to try and deny it?”

Bucky sighs, running a hand through his hair. “You’re one of the only people I have left that have a connection to Steve.”

Another bitter laugh escapes your mouth. He doesn’t understand. “He abandoned me, James! He abandoned us. Steve’s gone. You can’t hold on to him anymore. You don’t have to do anything Steve did. You have nothing to prove to me, I promise. I don’t need you to replace Steve. I need you, Buck. You’re the one that’s here with me, not Steve.”

Tears threaten to spill over your cheeks and you look away from him. The silence is deafening and Bucky moves to take you in his arms. He holds you against his chest and cards his fingers through your hair. You cry against his chest and cling to his henley. He gently guides you to the bed and sits down with you in his lap.

“I’m sorry, honey,” he whispered, rubbing your back. “You’re right. It just scared me. I don’t think I can handle losing you too. I’m sorry.”

You pull away to look at him with your tear stained cheeks and he carefully wipes away your tears with the pad of his thumb. You blink away the remaining tears and lean into his touch. “It’s okay, Buck. You can’t get rid of me that easily.” 

You rest your forehead against his and breathe him in. His metal hand rubs circles against your back and it sends shivers down your spine. He holds you carefully and no words are exchanged. Your eyes flicker to his lips and your heart thunders against your chest. 

There’s a soft knock at the door and you pull your body off of Bucky’s. You sit beside him as Sam pokes his head inside the room. “Is everything okay?” he asked, looking between the two of you. 

You look over at Bucky and then back to Sam. You smile and nod slowly. “Everything’s perfect, Sam.”

[maximons]

All Is Lost

Summary: Zombies have taken over the world, humanity on the edge of extinction. All hope was lost. Despite that, Wanda couldn’t seem to let go of Y/n, who had fallen victim to the plague herself.

Word Count: 2,263

Genre: Angst

Requested?: No

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, death, cannibalism, suicide, mentions of blood. Spoilers for Ep. 5 of What If...?

A/N: I know, I know, I’m gonna get into the stuff I promised soon. But for now, the Zombies episode inspired me and this came out. If you haven’t seen the episode yet, go watch it. Its amazing and depressing. Also this is DARK guys, probably the darkest thing I’ve ever written, so...Happy Reading!

The Zombie apocalypse was always something everyone joked about, but never something that anyone could actually predict.

Everything happened so quickly, Wanda could barely keep up. It’s hard to believe that everything was so normal only two weeks ago. Now, she was locked away with Vision in an abandoned military base in New Jersey. Desperate to survive for as long as possible while Vision worked on a cure.

Some of his experiments had been a success, most notably Scott Lang who he was able to revert back from his zombified state. However, the man was now only a severed head.

Despite the success, Vision was less than optimistic. For one, Scott was one of the first infected. While the cure worked on him, the android theorized that the disease has mutated greatly since then, and it was likely impossible to cure everyone. And even if he could, the technology to do so is beyond human comprehension and therefore doesn’t exist.

Vision might have all but given up hope, but Wanda didn’t. She couldn’t. She refused to give up on you.

Wanda and you have been best friends for as long as Wanda had been an Avenger. You were already a member of the team and greeted her with an open mind and open arms, despite all she had done. You had fire powers, and while your powers weren’t identical to Wanda’s, you still offered some basic tips and tricks to keep such explosive powers at bay.

It wasn’t a surprise that she fell in love with you.

But her stupid fear had to get in the way, and when you came to confess your own feelings for her, she panicked and rejected you. You were so heartbroken, Wanda didn’t need to read your mind to know that.

And it kills her everyday knowing that that was the last interaction she had with you. The last one with you as yourself anyway.

All that remained now was the flesh hungry, blood thirsty monster that wore your, now rotting, skin.

This wasn’t you, she knows that. She looked into your mind and saw no trace of the woman you once were, the one she loved with all her heart. She couldn’t feel you, you were gone.

Despite this, Wanda couldn’t let you go. She couldn’t handle losing you entirely. She already lost almost everyone.

She managed to convince Vision to keep you in the base for testing. You were locked behind a large steel door, with only a window to see you through. But you were here, and that’s all Wanda cared about.

The cure wasn’t working for you. Your powers caused it to incinerate when it entered your system, proving it to be ineffective. Still, she refused to give up.

Vision thought it best to terminate you after the failed tests, but Wanda begged him not to. Knowing he couldn’t overpower her, and sensing his friend’s distress with anything that comes to you, he agreed. As long as Wanda had it under control.

She doubted he knew that she was luring innocent survivors into the base so you could feed on them, but she did what she had to do.

Wanda spent most of her days sitting outside of your cell. The first few days, you were ravenous. Banging on the walls and trying to burn them down, growling and screeching with the inhuman noise that took over your vocal chords, but you didn’t manage to break free. After a while, it seemed you have given up, and just sat in place. Only moving when Wanda opened the cell and let some of your ‘food’ in.

There were times where Wanda thought that maybe, just maybe, the cure was working more than they thought. You seemed to have recognized her, your facial expressions formed into ones that she had recognized and missed dearly. But that hope quickly died when she would peek into your head and still sense nothing.

“Hey, Y/n.” Wanda walked up to outside your cell and sat cross-legged like she did everyday. Your head rose, staring at her with your now glowing yellow eyes. “Still no progress on the cure, but don’t worry, I’m not giving up yet.” You offered no response, not that she expected one. “It’s hard. It’s only getting worse out there...” She sighed as she trailed off. She raised her hand to the glass, like she always did. “I’m going to figure it out...we’re gonna get you back to normal, and I’m going to tell you every day how much I love you. I miss you so much, but...we’re almost there. I can feel it...” Wanda’s voice started choking up, as tears ran down her face. “We deserve our happy ending.”

Her hand was still pressed against the glass as she finished her speech. She was about to lower it, but then something unexpected happened. You stared at her hand curiously, beginning to raise your own. Wanda watched, smile forming on her face as your arm made it’s way to the glass. 

“Wanda! Please come here, we have a situation.” You had almost pressed your hand against Wanda’s, when Vision’s voice interrupted. Your attention turned to the direction it came from and you let out a growl, clearly angry at the interruption. Wanda sighed in disappointment, but she tried not to let it take over. You still showed massive improvement, something worth reporting back to Vision. “It’s okay.” She soothed you. “I’m going to go see what he wants then I’ll be right back, okay? I know you’re hungry, I’ll get you some food too.” You didn’t offer a response as she walked off.

“Vis! I have to tell you-” Wanda began as she walked into the main room, but cut herself off at the new faces. She didn’t recognize the bald woman with the spear or the wimpy looking man in a workers uniform, but she was familiar with Peter. What surprised her most though, was Bruce Banner. A man she hasn’t seen in over three years. “What is going on?”

“I ran into them outside the premises. Apparently word has gotten out about the cure.” Vision answered before turning his attention back to the guests. “As I told you, I am afraid we cannot help you. The cure seems to be a moot point.”

“Well, what about-” Peter began, but he was interrupted by a new voice.

“For something you have no hope for, you sure don’t have a problem bringing in new test subjects.” Wanda recognized Bucky Barnes’ voice. She turned around, and her eyes widened as she saw King T’challa on his arm, struggling to stand on his one remaining leg.

Shit.

“My king! We thought you dead.” The bald woman exclaimed in relief and surprise.

“Your highness. I was not aware you were in the base.” Vision said, confused on how that got by him. It didn’t take him long to figure out why. “Wanda...”

“I’m sorry.” Wanda whispered, knowing she was caught. “The cure wasn’t working on Y/n, and in order to keep her at bay, I had to feed her.”

“So you fed her our King?” A spear was raised to her throat, threateningly.

“It was nothing personal, I promise. I have her under control and the cure is starting to work, I know it. We just need a little more time!”

“Why not just kill her? You lured innocent people to their deaths just for her when there a couple million more Zombies out there that you could use for testing. Ones that have a chance of being cured.” The whole room went quiet after Bucky said that.

“Uh oh. Shouldn’t have said that.” Wanda heard Scott say, but she was too busy glaring at Bucky. Her eyes started to go red, but before she could do anything, she noticed the spear held to her throat begin to glow red and melt. The woman dropped the spear as it began to burn her hands.

“Did it just suddenly get like, super hot?” Peter asked as he began to fan himself.

“Oh no...” Wanda trailed off. She looked up to notice the steal walls that led to your cell begin to melt. “You’ve done it now...she hasn’t eaten in days.” Before anyone could respond, the steel doors melted completely. The man in the uniform was unfortunate enough to be standing in front of it, as a strong burst of flame shot out and incinerated him on the spot. Only a second later, you flew out the door, covered in flames as you hovered above everyone.

Wanda watched in horror as you began to fight everyone. They weren’t holding up very well, and that’s when Wanda finally realized what she had done. This wasn’t you, and if you were still here, you would hate to see your body be used to attack and kill others.

“Vision! Get us out of here!” She heard Bruce yell, and Vision shot a blast towards the wall, blowing it up and letting everyone out. Wanda turned her focus back to you, you watched them starting to escape and you began to fly after them, but a red mist surrounded you before you could. You turned your head, starting to growl, but stopped when you saw it was Wanda.

“Y/n. Stop...” You tilted your head, still struggling to move as Wanda came closer. She took a chance and reached up, gently placing a hand on your face. “I am so sorry...you never deserved this...” Your face softened at the touch, beginning to show the signs of emotion that Wanda desperately held onto. However, it was clear now that it was too late.

You snapped out of it, as you managed to break free from Wanda’s hold. You opened your mouth wide, intent on biting and feeding on her, but something stopped you. You hesitated, and Wanda noticed. You settled for pushing her aside to the ground as you reignited yourself and flew out of the base.

Wanda picked herself up after a moment, intent on stopping you. She ran past Okoye’s body, charred and eaten, but she was sure there was little time until she turned. She ran faster to where you were, now facing off against Bucky. She sprinted further, about to take off and fly when she paused.

Vision was face down on the ground. She kneeled next to him, glowing red hand turning over his body, afraid of what she’ll see. Once he was turned, Wanda gasped at the sight. The mind stone was torn out of his head.

“Oh no...no, no, no...” She held his body, tears slowly building as she mourned the loss of her best friend. She had officially lost everything. “I am so sorry Vis...I’m going to make this right, I promise.”

She heard Bucky scream. She looked over to see you start to feed on him. She saw Bruce, Peter, Scott and T’challa in the distance, making their way to the jet. They were your next target.

No. Wanda wasn’t going to let that happen. It ends now.

She used her powers to propel herself forward, landing directly in your path. You growled at her yet again as she used her powers to hold you. “Y/n...please, stop.” You struggled to get out of the hold, but Wanda held on. “This isn’t you...you wouldn’t want this...I love you more than anything, and I’m so sorry...I hope one day, you’ll forgive me.” 

Wanda used her powers to grab the gun laying by Bucky’s side. She held in to your head, ready to pull the trigger...but she couldn’t. She let out a scream of frustration and dropped her hold on both you and the gun. The gun fell to the ground, but you haven’t moved.

“I can’t do it...I...I’m not strong enough...” Wanda began crying, shutting her eyes and waited for you to finish her off. She failed everyone, no one deserved death more than her. She opened her eyes when nothing came. You stood, staring at her with a tilt of your head. The yellow of your eyes dimming as you stared.

“W....Wan...” You struggled to let out, but it was enough for Wanda to hear. She cried even harder. She was right, you were almost there...but it was too late now.

You took in your surroundings as best you could, you didn’t have a lot of awareness, but you knew enough to piece everything together. You saw the influx of zombies starting to enter to base.  Everyone needed to get away. You turned back to Wanda, and you knew what you had to do. You felt the little control you had start to slip away.

You bent down and picked up the discarded gun. You shakily pointed it to your temple, the control slipping away faster and faster. “Love....you....I...sorry...” You managed to croak out. Before you could lose control completely, you pulled the trigger.

Wanda watched in horror as you shot yourself in the head. Pieces of your brain landing on her, your blood drenching her. She looked down to see your body, half your face still together, but you were gone. Truly gone.

She knelt down sobbing, as she held your body. After a moment she looked up to see the Hulk appear as the zombies began to overwhelm the base. She saw the jet take off, and she gave a weak smile. They got away. Wanda’s job was done. This is where her story ends. All was lost for her.

So when the zombies finally reached her, she didn’t fight back. Accepting her death with open arms.

Epilogue

[pastelwitchling]

Kyle talks to Michael about Alex.

Kyle had had a strange pain in his chest since he’d accepted the surgeon’s offer, but as he stepped into the Wild Pony and saw Alex at their usual table, looking everywhere at once and tapping his fingers on his beer bottle, clearly uncomfortable with being alone, it was like a window suddenly opened to his heart.

A smile tugged at his lips. Alex saw him and smiled himself, raising a hand in greeting.

As Kyle slid into the booth, he said, “I have a raging headache in four corners of my mind, and only one of them is from my hospital shifts.”

Alex huffed a chuckle. “I get the feeling.”

“Right,” he nodded. “I keep forgetting that you’re in the club, too.”

“The club?”

“The We’re-Pretty-Much-On-Call-All-The-Time-Because-Someone-Always-Needs-Something Club.”

“Ah,” Alex leaned back in his seat, and handed Kyle the second bottle he’d ordered. “That club. It’s not so bad, being useful.”

He raised a brow. “That bad? I thought you liked your new job.”

“‘Liked’ may be a strong a word,” he confessed. “It’s definitely interesting.”

“And your boss?”

He sighed. “I’m still trying to crack him. What about you? Have you heard back from that hospital in California?”

Kyle looked down, and huffed a chuckle. “I think you’re the only one that’s asked me that. Come to think of it, I think you’re the only friend I have that doesn’t just call me for rescue.”

Alex’s smile dimmed. “So you have heard from them.”

He nodded. “And I accepted their offer.”

Alex said nothing, and Kyle looked up, expecting disappointment. But Alex wasn’t looking at him. He was staring off into the crowd of cowboys drinking by the pool table, his lips pursed, his brows furrowed.

“Do you hate me?”

“I’m sad,” he confessed, the corner of his lips tugged up in a soft smile. “I’ll miss you.”

Kyle felt a lump in his throat. For two days, he’d been deliberating his choices, wondering if it was the right thing to do. Everyone here, after all, needed him for one thing or another. He was worried he’d be letting people down. But Alex . . .

“Are you disappointed?”

He shook his head. “What do you mean?”

“I mean,” he hesitated, “I’m the resident alien doctor. What’re are they going to do if I’m not here?”

Alex raised a brow like it was obvious. “Manage.”

“Come on, Alex,” his shoulders fell. “You can’t fool me into thinking that you don’t care what happens to Michael.”

“All I’ve ever cared about is Michael,” he said simply, without doubt or pause. “But they’re not alone. I’m here, Liz is here. And you’ve done enough.”

“But you’ve always advocated for – for friendship, and being there for the people you love!”

“And you have been,” Alex chuckled. “And you will be. You’re moving to another state, not another planet. If it gets really bad, and I really can’t think of anything else, I’ve got your number.”

Kyle clenched his jaw. “But –”

“Kyle,” he leaned in, smiling. His eyes were glassy. “Take it from someone who built a career out of the military, and moved on. It’s time to tap out.”

Kyle didn’t know what to say. He didn’t have another argument, not with Alex’s eyes and words so sincere. Alex shrugged. “It’ll just be Roswell’s loss.”

He stared, searching for any sign of mockery or sugarcoating. But this was Alex. He didn’t lie, not for anyone.

He opened his mouth to speak, found the words lodged in his throat, then tried again. He really hadn’t realized how badly he’d needed Alex’s permission.

“Coming from you, Manes,” he confessed, “that means everything.”

 On his way home that night, and after a hug from Alex and a promise that he would come over the next day to help him start packing, Kyle realized there was one more thing he couldn’t leave without doing. One last duty that he owed his best friend.

So instead of going straight home, he turned a road and into the junkyard. Michael Guerin sat in front of the bonfire with a beer in hand, that stupid hat on his head, and raised a disinterested brow at Kyle as he stepped out.

“Well,” he said, “this is a surprise. The good doctor needs something from little old me?”

“Actually,” Kyle said, “yeah, I do.” Michael just stared, and he shrugged. “More of an order, actually.”

Michael started to smirk and leaned forward on his knees. “You’re gonna give me orders.”

“Just one,” Kyle said, hands in his pockets. He supposed he should’ve been more hesitant, more afraid. Michael, after all, was a dangerous loose wire even when he was sober, and he’d been on edge for whatever reason for the past few days.

But then Kyle remembered the dark circles around Alex’s eyes, the slight twitch of his fingers, the way he seemed to be struggling with the weight of Deep Sky and everything that came with it on his shoulders. And Michael. Always Michael.

“I need you to look after Alex.”

Michael’s smirk faltered. “Pardon me?”

“You heard me, Guerin,” he sighed, not in the mood to play back-and-forth. Not anymore. “Look after Alex. He’s not okay.”

That got Michael’s attention, and his eye twitched. “What’s wrong with him?”

Kyle tilted his head. “Oh I don’t know, why don’t you ask him? Or is it only that Alex is allowed to help you, and never the other way around?”

He stood. “Watch it, Valenti.”

“I have been,” he said. “For the past couple of years, I have been careful around you, Guerin, because part of me knew that whatever you broke in Alex, I can just fix. But I’m leaving town, and honestly? I’m scared for him. He’d never ask for help, but there has to be someone who cares enough about him to offer it anyway.”

Michael clenched his jaw and swallowed. “And you think that’s me?”

“I need it to be,” Kyle admitted, “because Alex doesn’t want anyone else.” Michael’s face fell. “He’s never wanted anyone else. So it’s either you, or I find some way to take him with me.”

Michael’s eyes flared, but Kyle held up a hand to silence him. “I’m not, Guerin, but I would. I can’t leave him here alone knowing he’s just going to keep being used.”

“I don’t use Alex,” he growled.

“No?” Kyle scoffed. “Did you know that he left the Air Force just last week?”

Michael looked like he’d been shot.

“With full honors?” he went on. “Did you know that he’s been recruited by the same secret organization that shot Max and drugged Jenna? Or that he’s already been given a mission? Do you have any idea how exhausted he is?”

When Michael didn’t answer, apparently too consumed with taking in all of this information, Kyle shook his head.

“You wouldn’t, would you? Because it’s all about you, all the time.” He shrugged. “Alex doesn’t mind, so why should you?” He shook his head, already starting to walk back to his car. “He deserves better than that.”

Leaving Michael standing in the desert, Kyle got into his car and drove away, finally feeling like he’d wiped the slate clean with his best friend.

*

Michael didn’t know why he was here. He walked the length of Alex’s porch, waiting for Alex, not having a clue as to where he could be. He realized there’d been a lot of that since that year away dismantling Project Shepherd. He had less and less to do with Alex, and it gave him a headache beyond anything else had.

How could he not know where Alex was? How could he not have asked? How did Kyle know?

Because Kyle pays attention to Alex, a voice in his head scorned. You don’t.

Michael clenched his jaw, still a little tipsy from his self-loathing beers, and ran his fists through his curls. Alex’s porch started to upend itself, the hardwood floors battling against the nails keeping them down, and Michael gasped, settling everything back in its place.

Just then, Michael caught a pair of headlights and squinted only for a second before Alex parked and turned off the car.

His heart started to rattle and his breaths came out quicker at the sight of Alex in his flannel and jeans. He missed him. He had no idea how badly he had until he’d come back, until he got to talk to him that first night a few days ago – drunk then, too – but he missed him. He missed him every second he was away, and somehow missed him more when he was here.

Alex had a brow raised, but Michael was studying his face. He saw it clearly now. The dark shadows under his eyes, his hollow cheeks, his hair sticking up in perfect, messy strands like he’d been running his hands through them all day, his stubble. How could he have not noticed?

“Uh oh,” Alex sighed at the look on his face. “Something’s wrong, isn’t it?”

Michael swallowed. Right, he thought. Because Alex only thought he showed up when he needed something.

He pushed past the ever-present lump in his throat and asked, “Why would something be wrong, Private?” He purposely used the nickname. “Can’t I just come say hi?”

Alex glanced down at the word Private, and back up again. He smiled and moved past Michael to open his door. “Not in my experience. Seriously” – he stood by the door, and nudged Michael inside – “what’s wrong?”

Michael didn’t budge, still smirking though it felt hollow. “Why didn’t you tell me about the Air Force?”

Alex looked startled that Michael knew. Did he really just never expect Michael to care about what was going on with him at all?

He shrugged. “It – uh – it was recent. Who told you? Max?”

Michael stared, then started to chuckle incredulously. “Did everyone but me know?”

Alex was not humoring him. “I told Greg and Kyle. They’ve both been spending time with Maria, and she’s been spending time with Max, I figured one of them must’ve mentioned it to her, and she must’ve mentioned it to him – look, would you please just come inside?”

Michael’s laughter faded and he pressed his lips together. He was still smiling, but his eyes burned. Alex seemed to realize he wouldn’t move on his own, and he gently took Michael’s jacket sleeve, tugging him in.

Once they were both in the living room, Alex set to work on a pot of tea. As he handed Michael a mug, Michael saw the light glimmering off a silver ring on his finger. His brows furrowed.

“That’s new.”

“Oh,” Alex glanced at it. “Yeah. So –”

“Wasn’t that the same ring Long had?”

“Yep.”

Alex was clearly avoiding his eyes. Michael was relentless, a burning in his chest forcing the words out.

“He gave it to you?”

“No,” Alex said. “This one’s mine.”

“Is this about that secret organization you joined?” Michael demanded. “Or was that recent, too?”

Alex smiled as he straightened, understanding dawning. “So Kyle told you. No wonder you’re wound so tight.”

“Meaning?”

“Meaning it’s one thing when my own brother knows a secret about me before you do,” Alex said, taking a seat at the end of the couch. “But Kyle knowing it first?” He scoffed and shook his head.

Michael leaned forward, glaring. “So I’m jealous,” he spat. “So what? Why does Kyle get to know more about you than I do?”

“He’s my best friend,” Alex said simply. “We just talk about ourselves around each other.”

“But you don’t talk about yourself to me.”

“Not usually,” Alex agreed.

“Why?” he demanded. “I’m more important?”

“Yes,” he said simply, and Michael clenched his jaw.

“That’s really what you think of me?”

“I think the world of you, Michael,” he said, and Michael faltered. “You’re everything to me.” He smiled. “You think I don’t tell you about what I’m doing because I don’t think you care? I don’t tell you because you’re all I care about. I was going to tell you about the Air Force, I swear, just . . . not yet.” He looked down at his hands, his thumb rubbing the backs of his fingers. “Some of this stuff hurts to talk about, and I just don’t . . . I don’t want to think about it yet.”

Michael’s brows furrowed. “You’re . . . sad about leaving the military?”

He scoffed halfheartedly, slumping against the couch. “My whole life was the military. I had a family. Now I . . . don’t. I just need a minute to adapt.”

Michael tried to consider that, to be sympathetic, but he couldn’t be. For one obvious reason.

“But I’m your family.”

Alex huffed a laugh, and sniffled. He nodded. “I know.” He exhaled shakily, glancing at Michael, then stretched his arms high above his head. Michael was so distracted with his shirt riding up and revealing smooth, delicious skin that he didn’t notice Alex was lying down until his head was on his lap.

Michael froze, not knowing what to do.

“Hold still,” Alex murmured, his eyes already closed. “I haven’t slept in days and I’m exhausted.”

Slowly, Michael set a hand down on Alex’s waist, the other in his hair. His own heart hammered when Alex’s body melted under his touch and he seemed, for the first time since he’d seen him back, relaxed.

He leaned back on the couch, unable and unwilling to look away from Alex. “Then sleep, Private,” he whispered. “I’ll keep you safe.”

[levi-my-beloved]

Birds of a Feather

Chapter one

Pairings: Canon!Levi x F!reader

Content warnings: violence, swearing

Word count: 4K

Summary: You were the most notorious criminal in the Underground City. With your organisation of highly skilled professionals, only one man could take you down. He also happened to be Humanity’s Strongest… and your ex.

A/N: asdfghjkl hello there. so, this has been on my brain for a while now, so i started this as just a drabble. what i thought would stay as just a drabble turned into this 22k+ multi chapter fic because i have zero self restraint or self respect. i’m currently finishing chapter 5 as this is being posted, but i want to keep chapters posted around once every two weeks so i can keep up with the workload. maybe once a week if i start feeling spicy. yeah plot twist this is actually the second time i’ve drafted this up. the first time i managed to get everything done and in order and then manages to delete the entire post with my huge disgusting thumbs. Genuinely felt like crying for a good half an hour.

This is also my first Levi fic! yay! lmk if it sucks and idk i’ll cry or something. nah, in all seriousness please send me criticism cuz i really want to improve and critiques are the best way.

𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔𖣔

“How down, Raven?”

“Six feet.”

Within the dank confines of a stinking alleyway, two green capes marked with the Military Police insignia crept ever closer to the taller, run-down building upon which you and your little squad of Shadows were now perched. No sunlight illuminated your position. Not that you’d ever seen the sun, or know what it even looked like, but you based your guesses upon the pathetic rays shining through the grates littering the ceiling of the Underground City.

The language you used with your Shadows, coded words translated to:

‘How do you want them to be dealt with?’

‘Death.’

It was something developed by your late guardian and mentor, Viper. See, you all had aliases in The Nest, your criminal organisation. The leader was often referred to as The Raven, however your mentor preferred to use his own nickname, stemming from his own reputation.

Then come the aliases for your Shadows. Prongs was your second, a tall, stern looking man with the black mask of a stag settled across his features.

Then came Wolf, and you swore the first time you’d set eyes on him, you thought a titan had wandered into the city. He was enormous, all 6ft 6ins of him carved in hard muscle. Slicked back silver hair and a beard that to rival a bear. Similar to Prongs, a mask sat upon his face, resembling that of a snarling wolf.

Following him was Verdant, Scales and Diablo. Your power trio. Though their special talents lay in different professions, get these three together and they were borderline unstoppable. A white mask decorated with three broad maple leaves obscured Verdant’s pretty features, Scales sported a bronze half mask etched with a snake-like diamond pattern, whilst Diablo, your trained escort, had opted for something that accentuated her own gorgeous features, a mask of black leather arcing high onto her brow on the left side, whilst the right arced low by her jaw. Though you were already spoken for, you couldn’t deny the beauty of Diablo. She did wonders when prying information between the legs of a moaning MP.

To your left crouched the twins, Una and Leaf. Una was gifted her name by none other than you yourself, after seeing her accuracy with a rifle. A single shot was all it took, from any distance. She wore no mask, something you’d allowed simply because she’d complained about the sight obstruction when lining up a shot. You’d agreed, but only under the condition that she wore a low hood. Her fiercely protective brother Leaf had chewed you out for that, but you knew he meant well. Leaf was good at what he did, excellent, in fact. Which was part of the reason you kept him on as a Shadow. The larger part was that you were damn fond of him. Of all of them, in fact. You loved every single one of your Shadows. Every single damned member of The Nest, you adored. You were their leader, afterall.

A masked helmet of black leather, similar material to Diablo’s, perched snug upon your own features. The hooked beak and obsidian feathers of a raven decorated the necessity, covering your face and hair, though leaving your lower features visible. It was a rite of passage, for you especially, and it signalled the start of your leadership.

“Una, set up. Verdant, Prongs, roundabout. Wolf…” your eyes slid to the giant man on your right, a dark smile slicing across your mouth. “Heel.”

The boulder of a man visibly sagged, clearly disappointed at your orders whilst the others sprang into action. Prongs and Verdant leapt across the rooftops in separate directions whilst Una removed her rifle from her back, parting her heavy cloak to reveal rounds and rounds of bullets strapped across her body. Leaf nestled closer into her side, whilst the other four took a step back. It was obvious you’d all been at this for a very long time, despite the twins not looking a day older than sixteen. In fact, most of your squad was younger than you, save for Wolf and Prongs, who had served their respective roles twice previously.

Sitting back on your heels, you watched your team get to work, the warmth of pride blossoming in your chest. Whilst you knew Prongs and Wolf were already incredibly skilled, the rest had flourished under your leadership. It had been ten years since you’d witnessed MPs put a bullet through your mentor’s skull. Ten long years since you’d taken up leadership and expanded the reaches of The Nest. Honestly, you were pretty proud of yourself, and none more so than when you watched your Shadows do what they do best.

Taking care of unwanted visitors.

Una took aim, resting the butt of her rifle in the crook of her shoulder, staring down the makeshift scope. She would be ready to take care of the two soldiers if either Prongs or Verdant failed to eliminate their targets.

Speaking of which…

That kernel of pride ignited as your (E/C) eyes followed Verdant’s careful, calculating form dropping from the rooftops above the alleyway, in sync with Prong’s own movements. The two assassins swooped with the grace of a stooping hawk, the silver glint of metal caught your eye as they both brandished their blades, before sinking the steel into the necks of the two soldiers. You didn’t need to be closer to see they were both dead. Expert precision. Deadly accuracy. That was why these people were your hand-picked Shadows. And why you were the most formidable gang leader in the Underground City. Your little criminal organisation had expanded into something to rival the killcount of Kenny the Ripper. You couldn’t help but chuckle at the thought.

Una lowered her weapon, strapping it back in the buckles between her shoulder blades.

“Finished.” she simply stated, turning back to drop down between the shattered tiles and splintered ceiling beams that marked your entrance and exit to this lookout point.

“Rendezvous back at The Nest,” you ordered flatly, before dropping forward and into the alleyway below.

“Anything?” you ask, a brow raised behind your raven mask as you saunter over. Prongs held up two sets of blades from one of the crimson bodies now gathering dirt and grime. Useless to you as they were, but somebody would definitely find an interest in them. Verdant seemed to be struggling with the straps of whatever gear these mosquitoes used to fly around. You’d never been able to figure out how to use it, but that shit made good money when in doubt. However, your usual buyers had disappeared off the face of the city, and you’d noticed a decline in gear sales since then. Gritting your teeth, you shook your head to Verdant, laying a hand on her shoulder.

“Don’t. It’s not worth it. The thug trio haven’t been back in years. I doubt they’d return to us now,” you explain softly, prompting the girl to stop her struggles and huff defeatedly. You’re heart ached softly at the thought of him, but you pushed the feeling down.

“Here,” she muttered, handing you another rifle. It seemed to be a newer model, something of an upgrade for Una.

“You did good, Ver. I’m proud of you,” that seemed to immediately lighten the girl’s mood, her eyes shining behind her mask as her mouth widened into a toothy grin.

“Thanks Raven!” she beamed, before scampering off back to The Nest, almost forgetting to take the gun back from your outstretched hand in her haste to make it back and tell everyone she’d received a compliment from you. It wasn’t an everyday occurrence. Rather it only happened once in a blue moon…

A huffed chuckle had your head turning and eyes narrowing to your second in command.

“Can I help you?” you ask, your tone dripping with the poisonous threat of hell if he chose his next words poorly. But Prongs continued to smile ever so slightly, shaking his head.

“Not at all, Raven. It’s just, in the last few years, since you drafted her into the Shadows, she’s really come into her own,” Prongs explained simply, shrugging as she stooped to kick over the now drained corpse, hoping to find anything useful. You bristle ever so slightly. That was something you hated. Compliments. How the fuck were you supposed to respond? You tried to think back to when Viper tried to teach you simple social skills.

“Uh, yeah. She has,” you respond, keeping your features as neutral as you could as you turned away, beginning to trudge back to The Nest.

“I’m serious, Rave. You’ve done incredible things for us. You know Viper would be proud of you. I am too. But…” Prongs trailed off, clearing having something to say but not knowing how to say it.

“Go on. But what?” you pressed, wanting to hear what your second in command had to say.

“Well, don’t you think it’s a bit much? Rave, it’s been years. Eyes have started looking in our direction since those three vanished. You don’t think we should be lying low for a bit? Calming suspicions instead of rousing them?” Prongs offered gently. You knew, deep down, he was right. But some notable gang disappearing hasn’t stopped you before, and it sure as hell wouldn’t stop you now.

“I’ll talk to Scar about it,” even just the mention of your advisor, and wife’s name gave your stomach butterflies. Scarlett Obsidine, your other, and better, half. After the disappearance of a certain dark haired man, Scar was the woman who comforted you, and though you missed him dearly, your heart managed to haphazardly piece itself back together and love all over again.

“Rave, listen—“

“Let’s go,” Prongs closed his mouth, the tone of your voice stating clearly that this matter wasn’t up for discussion. Especially not with him.

⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈

“You know he’s right,” you couldn’t help but sigh when your wife’s soft tones calmed your irritated mood. Soft hands gently kneaded at the tense muscles in your shoulders, forcing them to relax as a tired moan escaped your lips. Leaning back, you peer into her shining sapphire eyes, locks of brunette framing your face as she took the sides of your cheeks in her hands and leaned down, softly pecking your lips with her own. You couldn’t help humming a smile against her mouth, reaching up to deepen the kiss, but she pulled away before you could.

“Scaaaaar…” you pout, looking up at her mischievous smirk as she winked playfully.

“(Y/N)...” Scarlett sighed, swinging her legs over your body to sink into your lap, one thumb now caressing one of the most prominent features on your face. A nasty, jagged scar ran down from the the top of your forehead, over your right eye and finishing just past your jaw bone. One (E/C) iris lighter than the other as a result of the old wound. Soft lips chase away the shadows of your past as Scarlett replaced her thumb with her mouth.

“(Y/N), I don’t want to find you dead in some alleyway because you picked a fight you couldn’t win,” a finger poked your chest as she huffed above you, feigning irritation. You roll your eyes, (E/C) landing on your gear now strung across the table. That raven helmet almost calling to you as you shook your head. Disagreeing with your wife was never a good idea, but you were feeling particularly bold this evening.

“Look. So many jobs have opened up recently. We have so many opportunities to make this life more comfortable. More jobs means more money, more money means we can afford the gate toll and actually see the world above ground. And I can finally buy you an actual ring.”. Technically, you two weren’t married. Who the fuck would be stupid enough to perform marriage ceremonies in the underground City? But, it was easier than saying you were devoted to each other in every single way.

Lightly smacking your chest, Scarlett raised herself from your lap with a hefty sigh. “One of these days (Y/N), you’re going to be captured or killed,” she said quietly, unable to meet your eyes. “And then what the hell will I do…?” Scarlett had now completely turned away from you, shoulders hunched. Running a hand down your face, you pick your sore body up from the chair, reaching her in a matter of strides.

“I can’t give this up, Scar. You know that. You knew that when you chose to be with me. You knew The Nest was always going to be my priority,” you held out your arm, hand hovering over her back, not sure whether to comfort her or let her go. The admission almost had her in tears, you could tell by the way her shoulders shook ever so gently.

“You still miss him don’t you?” It was her vulnerable, defeated tone that alerted you to the slight change of topic.

You fell silent, not really knowing how to respond. Yes, of course you missed him. You loved him more than anything. But those days are over, you knew that. You’d cried enough those following nights after his disappearance.

He was probably dead anyway.

“Of course I do,” you wouldn’t lie to her. That wasn’t fair. But you knew the truth was just as painful for her.

“Will I ever be enough? Will I ever be enough to replace him?” the sound of her voice had your heart in pieces. You loved Scarlett. You really did. But your heart wouldn’t let you love her wholly. Part of yourself will always be dedicated to that grumpy kid you’d fallen for all those years ago.

“Scar… I—”

“I know,” she whispered, stepping forward away from your outstretched grasp. “I know,” you watched as the woman you loved, and who loved you, stepped from your shared quarters, hovering in the doorway. “I’m sorry I asked,” she closed the door as she left, leaving you a frustrated, conflicted mess.

⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈

“Understood, I’ll bring them in right away. Thank you Niles,” The Commander of the MPs stood opposite Erwin, arms folded. An expression of irritation plastered on his sunken features. Erwin simply sighed, realising Niles was wanting to stay for this seemingly impromptu meeting. With a nod of his head, a cadet rushed off to find the two soldiers mentioned in their little conversation. Being Commander of the Scouts often had its perks, like having cadets around to run errands for him.

Niles cleared his throat, taking a seat on the green leather sofa within Erwin’s office. “You sure he’d help us? I mean, it wasn’t too long ago he actually decided killing you was probably a bad idea.”—he raised a thin brow, peering at Erwin with barely concealed suspicion—“I’m pretty sure the Underground City would be the last place he’d want to return.” a knock at the door cut their conversation short, both turning their heads as Erwin called;

“Enter.”

Hange was the first to make her presence known, poking her head in as she opened the door. A smile adorned the slightly dishevelled section commander, her hair sticking up in all directions. Clearly she had been in the middle of something when Erwin requested her presence.

“You asked to see us, Erwin?” her eyes sparkling with curiosity behind her glasses as she stepped through the door.

“Tch, just make it quick, I have shit to do,” the monotone voice of Levi behind her made Erwin pinch the bridge of his nose. How many times has he told him not to talk to him like that?

“Yes, come in and make yourselves comfortable.” Hange immediately took up a seat next to Niles on the sofa, Levi preferring to stand against the now closed door, arms folded. Erwin’s sharp eyes shifted to Niles, an indication for the MP Commander to speak.

“Well, no point in beating around the bush. We’ve received an anonymous tip about some criminal gang that’s been plaguing my soldiers in the Underground City.” Levi visibly stiffened at the mention of his old home. His jaw tensed in anticipation. There would be only one reason he would be called into such a discussion, and the answer was a firm no.

Without his permission, his mind flashed back to a (H/C) girl, her face etched with that ever mischievous smirk. He quelled the thoughts as quickly as he could. He needed his wits with him, and allowing his mind to wander back to what he’d left behind wouldn’t help anything. Besides, the likelihood of you being alive was close to none.

“Section Commander, I don’t suppose you would have heard of the group but Captain Levi here surely would have done. The Nest.” Niles continued, now eyeing Levi to gage his reaction. And for a man whose emotions were usually on a tight leash, this seemed to be what cracked his impenetrable walls. His eyes flew wide open, frantically searching between Niles and Erwin. They couldn’t be serious. The Nest? That was where Farlan and Isobel used to—

Shit, he really needed to keep his thoughts at bay. But what he did know was that The Nest was an impenetrable fortress of criminal activity. Trying to mess with them was suicide.

“Judging by your reaction, I’m going to assume you are familiar with them, Levi,” Erwin’s surprisingly calm tone eased the growing tension in the room. Taking a subtle breath to calm himself, Levi’s eyes narrowed to his commander.

“Yeah. I know of it. Why?” it was a rhetorical question, he already knew why, but he wanted to hear it from Erwin himself. Hange looked incredibly confused, looking between the men in the office, trying to glean something, anything, about what the hell was going on.

“The Nest? Why are they so bad?” she asked, not afraid to show how completely oblivious she is to anything that doesn’t concern titans or science. Erwin gestured to Levi.

“Levi? Care to explain? You probably know more than myself and Niles combined,” though his voice seemed kind, there was a slight edge to his deep tones. One that didn’t go unnoticed by Levi.

A heavy silence filled the room as the Captain wracked his brain for all the information he could think of regarding the organisation. It seemed like hours before he finally spoke.

“Well, you got one thing right. The Nest is a criminal organisation. A nasty one at that. Merciless bastards. Whether you’re a soldier or a citizen, they don’t give a shit. They’ll leave you a broken, bloodied mess in the street. I don’t know much about their leader. Only that he took over from the previous one around ten-ish years ago. Since then, they’ve expanded their shitty little gang and taken over an entire section of the city,” he explained, poison lacing his tone. It wasn’t that he was above the whole gang thing, oh no. It was more the state Farlan would be in before he left to meet whoever the fuck led that group of demons. He’d never seen his friend so anxious. So afraid.

“You never met him? Their leader?” Erwin inquired, lacing his hands together on the desk in front of him. Levi scoffed, rolling his eyes.

“If I had, I would tell you. But I know he’s smart. And not the good kind of smart. The kind of smart where he would always be ten steps ahead of you. He has a small group of trusted criminals surrounding him at all times, called his Shadows. They’ll be the ones to look out for,” Despite his voice sounding bored, Levi’s heart was racing. They couldn’t seriously be thinking of facing The Nest, could they? But something in the expressions of both Niles and Erwin told him he was wrong. Dead wrong.

“They’ve been picking off my soldiers. Always in the same places as well. I was going to leave it, just tell them to avoid certain areas until this tip. Their next job. We know what it is,” Niles interjected, looking down to the floor, his own mind a whirlwind.

“And you want to intercept them. The same way you did with me, right?” Levi finished through gritted teeth. This was absurd. There was no way they could pick them all off. Unless… that wasn’t the goal. Levi’s grey eyes widened slightly, realising what they wanted to do. Yep, this was total suicide. Hange clapped her hands together almost excitedly, as if she was also able to read Erwin’s mind.

“You want to capture him! The leader! Ah! This all makes so much sense now, I was starting to wonder why I was here,” the scientist mused almost to herself, before jumping to her feet. “This is the perfect opportunity to test some of the concept traps I have in mind. Obviously for titans they’d need to be much, MUCH bigger. And of course a few modifications would have to be made so they could adapt to size and body type but oooooooh this is so exciting! I’ll start right away!'' Without allowing anybody to get a word in edgeways, Hange dashed back to her lab to begin her preparations.

“Thank you Erwin, the Military Police will remember this,” Niles said, before he too was rising from his seat. Throwing Levi an unsure glance, he made his way towards the door, only to be shoved into the hallway by Levi, who promptly closed the door behind him.

“Don’t.” he simply said, turning back to Erwin who was peering at him, his expression puzzled. Levi rolled his eyes again, clearly having to clarify what he meant. “Don’t pursue them. It’s suicide,” The Commander’s expression relaxed slightly in understanding.

“We don’t have a choice, Levi. Not only are hundreds of MPs being slaughtered down there, but relationships between the Scouts and the MPs are strenuous at best. It would be in our best interests to—“

“Bullshit.”

Erwin sighed again, having to hold his tongue. Snapping at Levi now for his language would only rile up the man more.

“Levi, we already have a plan in motion. There are soldiers down there now meeting whoever gave us that anonymous tip to further discuss the job The Nest has taken. It’ll be fine, but you’re going to have to trust me.” Erwin’s eyes bore into Levi’s own, the man once again asking his Captain to trust him in a risky call he’s made. Levi’s done it so many times before, why was it so difficult now?

It took yet another pregnant silence before Levi eventually yielded.

“Fine, but don’t be surprised when we’re once again forced to retreat with our tails between our legs.” it was a savage comment, but one that Erwin didn’t take to heart as he watched the raven haired man leave. Yes, this was a risk, but all his risks so far had worked out fairly well. There was no reason why this one would fail. No reason at all.

Levi leant against the door to Erwin’s office, looking down the hallway before letting loose a long breath. Not only would he have to go toe to toe with The Raven, but he also had to face so much of his past he’d wanted to forget. Fuck, this was a terrible idea. Why did Erwin always have to gamble? It was exhausting for everyone else involved.

Folding his arms, the shorter man strode back to his own office, lost in thought the entire way. Would he see you again? Were you even alive? Did you know just how much he had missed you. Just how much he’d wanted to see you again. To hold you again.

Did you know he’d looked for you? How his heart shattered over and over again each time he found no trace of you. He’d never accepted you were gone. Always holding onto that thorn of hope that maybe, just maybe, you’d survived.

Collapsing in his chair behind his desk, Levi unlocked the bottom draw and gently pulled it out. He delicately picked out a small, ebony bird feather you’d crafted into a quill pen. Even though neither of you knew how to write, you knew back then how much he had wanted to learn despite never voicing it directly. All those nights spent copying out basic letters from discarded newspapers and wanted posters. You always had this way of reading his mind.

The smallest fond smile crept across his usually bored face. God he missed you. It had been years and he still missed you like he only lost you yesterday.

[miyanom]

AND YOU JUST CAN’T SAY GOODBYE...

MASTERLIST | JEAN KIRSTEIN X F!READER

synopsis: in which the raid of liberio takes the most important thing in jean’s life; you.

warnings: 4x08 spoilers!!! Angst, major character death (y/n), mentions of guns and blood

Y/N stared down at the ruins of Liberio as she flew overhead, holding tightly onto the gun of her anti-personnel gear — the thing keeping her attached to the aircraft as she reeled herself in.

But she couldn’t tear her eyes away from the mass of bodies laying beneath them, the bodies of the civilians who weren’t given the chance to make it out before the bombings.

She tried convincing herself this was all for a reason, that it was the only way. But she couldn’t. How could she when the bodies continued to pile up, when the blood staining their hands got thicker and thicker?

Freedom, they called it. They were fighting for freedom — but how many innocent lives would they have to exchange for it? How many more wars stood between them and the freedom they so desperately seeked?

Releasing a shaky breath, Y/N climbed into the aircraft, ignoring the voices speaking her way as she moved away from the entrance in utter silence.

She just wanted to go home, forget all about what happened here today... forget about the innocent lives lost to Eren’s plan. Eren, the reason they had come to Marley in the first place.

He had already made his way back into the ship, so had Captain Levi and the others. Even so, Y/N couldn’t shake the uncanny feeling gnawing at her gut. Their plan had so far been mostly successful, why did she feel like something was going to go wrong still?

“Oi, Jean!” Connie’s voice mentioning Jean’s name was enough to snap Y/N out of her thoughts. Pushing her way through the crowd of soldiers who had made their way back to the airship, Y/N dropped down at the entrance, holding out a hand to help Jean inside.

Looking up at his friends waiting for him, Jean reached up to grab ahold of Y/N’s hand, allowing the girl to pull him into the safety of the ship Commander Hange had secured for them.

As soon as Jean’s knee pressed against the wooden floor, Y/N was launching herself into his arms. A whiff of his scent being enough to wash away her fears even slightly.

Maybe things hadn’t gone exactly according to plan, but Jean had made it back alive, they both had. And that’s all that mattered to Y/N in that moment.

Pulling back slightly, Jean stared at Y/N’s face, taking in her appearance like she’d disappear from his hold at any moment. “Thanks for coming back alive,” she whispered with a small smile, one of her hands caressing his cheek gently.

“I always will,” Jean told her, quite suddenly moving in to press his lips against hers in a kiss.

Y/N didn’t want to move away, just wanting to live in that moment for the rest of eternity.

The idea of leaving the fight behind and living a safe life with Jean always remained in the back of her mind, the lingering thought being the only thing that helped her sleep at night when the toll of the war became too much.

There was only one thing stopping her, and she knew it stopped Jean, too.

Though he’d never admit just how much he cared about Sasha and Connie, Y/N knew him well enough to have a good idea. He’d never leave them to fight this tortuous fight alone.

The couple’s reunion was broken up by Connie and Sasha as their sibling-like bickering grew loud enough to break through Jean and Y/N’s little bubble.

Jean let out a sigh, standing up and helping Y/N back onto her feet before they walked over to the others. “You owe me a big fucking meal, Connie!” Sasha complained, pointing a finger at Connie who was shaking his head.

“Speaking of debts, I think you guys owe me a drink when we get back to the island,” Y/N grinned, throwing her arms over Connie and Jean’s shoulders as her eyes flickered between the two. “Seeing as I paid last time, it’s the least you two could do.”

It was over. The war was just beginning, but this fight was over, Y/N kept telling herself. Ignoring the fear still coursing through her veins.

“I think it’s Jean’s turn.” Connie immediately threw the other boy under the bus, earning a glare from Jean.

Y/N smiled up at him. “Come on, Jean~” she cooed. “Since you love me and all.”

Jean stared at her for a moment before sighing and averting his gaze, the telltale sign that he couldn’t say no to Y/N. “Fine.”

Y/N and Connie immediately turned to each other, high-fiving in victory. Though the moment was short lived as Jean turned around, and a gunshot was suddenly echoing through the air.

Y/N’s body quickly spun around, her eyes widening as she felt a sharp pain pierce through her torso. “Y/N?!” Sasha’s voice sounded so quiet over Y/N’s pounding heart as she stumbled backwards from the shock.

As the pain travelled through her body, Y/N felt her legs give out beneath her, and within seconds, she was hitting the cold wooden floor of the aircraft.

“Y/N! Hold on!” Sasha screamed, falling to her knees and pressing her hands against Y/N’s wound as the others all gathered around the attackers. “Stay with…”

Moments later, Sasha’s shouts were being cut off as Jean fell by Y/N’s side, shouting her name in fear that she wouldn’t make it. “J… Jean.” Her words came out in a gasp, her raspy breaths making Jean and Sasha share a look as he carefully pulled the girl into his arms.

“Come on, Y/N, just hold on,” he pleaded.

“Jean,” she coughed out again. And Jean finally noticed the blood gathering on the corner of her mouth, as hot tears began to stream down her face. “I want… I want to go home.”

“You’re going to make it back, I promise,” he whispered, cradling her face in one hand as he thumbed away her tears. “And I’ll buy you that drink.”

They both knew it was a lie. Y/N, from the way her pain had begun to subside as a foreign coldness began to settle in its place. And Jean, knowing it just from the amount of blood he could see pooling on the floor beneath her.

Though despite it all, Y/N smiled weakly, gasping out what could very likely be her last words. “I love you…”

As Y/N began to go silent, her eyes struggling to stay open, Jean finally began to pay attention to the blood seeping from her wound, creating a pool of crimson around her fallen frame.

Y/N could hear it — her comrades’ cries of desperation. They wanted her to hold on, but what was there to hold on to? Perhaps the happy memories of the people they once were, before the war had truly taken its toll…

She hoped to take it all with her as her time finally came. Though she guessed her time was now, in a foreign country, in the arms of someone so familiar she could see his face even with her eyes closed.

“Are you serious?” Y/N stared at Jean in shock. “The Survey Corps? I thought you had your heart set on the Military Police, what happened?”

“Not that suicidal bastard, if that’s what you’re thinking!” Jean crossed his arms, staring her down for a moment before he sighed and looked away, a frown tugging at his lips. “I just… I don’t want- I don’t want those charred bones to be disappointed in me.”

Y/N’s expression softened as she took his words in. The Battle of Trost had been hard on all of them, losing Marco had made it almost 100% worse. Especially for her and Jean.

Hearing about her friend’s death, without knowing how it happened, was something she never wanted to go through again. Unfortunately for them, Jean happened to be her best friend, and she wasn’t about to let him be another body with an unknown death. Another person she lost without trying to help them survive.

“Then I’m joining the Survey Corps, too!” Y/N said, her fists clenched tightly as Jean’s head snapped back in her direction.

“Y/N-”

“Don’t even try to change my mind, cause you can’t,” she told him. “I… I’m staying by your side, okay? If anything happens, I- I just want to be there.”

Without so much as a word, Jean was pulling Y/N into his embrace. “Y/N-”

He was crying? Why? Why was Jean crying?

Y/N’s eyes slowly flickered open once more, immediately being met with Jean’s teary eyes as he held her close. She remembered now… she was shot.

Maybe that’s why she couldn’t move her arm even the slightest bit to wipe away Jean’s tears and comfort him. That’s all she wanted to do. She hated seeing him cry, it was the worst feeling in the world.

Weakly, her eyes flickered to her other side. Sasha and Connie sat there, clinging to each other as they sobbed. A tear slipped from Y/N’s eye as she watched them, unable to move a single muscle in her body.

She hated seeing the people she cared for in pain, and all of this suffering was because of her? Why? Why did this have to happen?

“Stay with me, please, Y/N.” Jean begged.

She wanted to. That’s all she wanted. But she was so tired, and everything hurt, even breathing seemed too much at this point.

Jean raised his hand once more, accidentally smearing her own blood against her cheek as he held her face delicately in his large hand. “I love you.”

I don’t want to leave you… that’s what she wanted to tell him, but no words came out, only broken gasps that’d haunt Jean for the rest of his life as she bled out in his arms.

As Y/N’s eyes shut once again, she wasn’t greeted with the face of the man she loved, rather, she was blinded by a bright light. The voices of her friends screaming for her to wake up fading into white noise as she slipped out of consciousness.

This was her end…

“Y/N!” A soft voice seemed to echo through the air as Y/N’s eyes flickered open.

“Where… where am I?” Y/N whispered, pushing herself up as she looked around. She was still in the aircraft, but no one else was. Jean and the others weren’t.

Before Y/N even had the chance to question it further, the voice repeated itself. And she finally turned around.

Y/N didn’t know what was expecting to see, but as her eyes fell onto Marco — the boy she hadn’t seen in years, the boy who looked like he hadn’t changed a day since his final moments in Trost — she couldn’t help but take off into a run.

Marco easily caught her as she embraced him. “Marco!” She cried out happily, before her eyes widened and she pulled back. “How… how are you here? You died. I- I saw…”

He remained silent as Y/N seemed to catch on to what was happening, one of her hands immediately to shooting to where her wound once was. “You’re fight’s over now,” Marco told her. “You can rest.”

“Rest,” Y/N repeated in a whisper, the word sounding foreign on her tongue. When was the last time she had rested, she couldn’t remember. It had been battle after battle, betrayal after betrayal. There was no room for rest in the middle of a war, she had been telling herself.

But now…

Now she could finally rest, knowing Connie and Sasha would take care of Jean for her. Knowing they’d win the war together and live long, safe lives.

It was all Y/N ever wanted. Even if she was unable to see it with her own eyes.

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[startanewdream]

Captain Potter

Summary: Lily Evans has a secret that the army cannot know and it doesn't help that her captain is trying to be her friend.

Note: So I was watching Mulan and it's Shirtless JP May and this got me into googling shirtless army man, so please enjoy this piece of very much self-indulgence set in another AU. Also, I have no knowledge of military ranks, so bear with me.

Read on AO3 or below:

‘Evans’, the captain calls, and Lily turns to him, slightly afraid as she always feels when she hears her name. Maybe this is the day her secret will be found, this is the day she will be expelled and will fall in disgrace —

But Captain Potter has one of his carefree trademark grins, none at all looking as if he is about to arrest her. He looks at ease, leaning against one of the training posts, arms crossed lazily, watching her with interest shining in his hazel eyes as if she is a puzzle he will understand someday.

Lily truly wishes he won't, so she avoids looking at him directly in the eyes.

‘Captain’, she answers at least, saluting. That seems to amuse him.

‘I have a name, you know’.

‘Hum’, she stops, unsure. Her interactions with the captain have been restricted — well, her interactions with everyone have been limited —, but she has watched him from afar.

He is young and yet he never tries to act bossy with all the other soldiers, never tries to impose himself. He may have a more affinity with three of the soldiers (his friends for a long time, as she gathered), but he tries to treat everyone fairly, encouraging and teaching all soldiers equally, from the weakest of them to the strongest, and it’s not hard for her to see why everyone is willing to follow him into battle. The only one that he hadn’t been able to reach some sort of relationship was with her.

Something that had fit Lily’s plans and worries very well.

‘Captain Potter?’, she tries.

‘I am someone besides a rank’, he suggests.

‘Mr. Potter’.

‘That would be my father. I am James ’, he says at least, as if she is unfamiliar with the name of the youngest captain of the army.

‘I know , but — it would not be proper —’

‘Liam’, he stops her and, just as anytime someone uses that name, Lily wants to look around searching for that person until she remembers her situation. ‘Can I call you Liam?’

‘I’d rather Evans’, she answers, grimacing, and when he looks dismayed, she adds quickly: ‘It’s how everyone calls me. Not… it’s more personal, really’.

‘Fine, Evans’. He grins again. It’s a beautiful smile, so open and inviting, that again Lily has no difficulty understanding the success he makes with all the other soldiers, why their unity is unanimous in praising him. There is something on him that draws people to him — her included. ‘Well, call me James. I can order you to if it will make it more proper’.

Lily lets out a laugh before she stops herself, biting her lips, worried. She shouldn’t laugh; though she can disguise her voice mildly well, her laugh is too thin, too sparkling. It’s not a man’s grave laugh.

Fortunately, the captain doesn’t seem to find anything amiss. He looks just… glad with her reaction.

‘So you are capable of laughing’, he notes teasingly. ‘I had my doubts, you know’.

‘There has never been an occasion, Cap — James ’.

He opens his mouth in an offended expression; it’s so dramatic that, again, she wants to laugh. ‘I beg your pardon? Yesterday, when someone — a very clever someone, I might add — pretended to be shot by an arrow? That was an occasion!’

‘Wasn’t that you?’, she asks, raising her eyebrows. It had been a long tense one minute in which one of the other soldiers, Sirius, had been sure he had shot by mistake the captain and his best friend before James had revealed himself alive, laughing hysterically and showing the fake arrow attached to his badge.

Sirius had punched him, all rank forgotten, but then he was laughing too and everyone thought it was hilarious.

‘It was fun ’.

‘It was terrifying’.

‘Oh, so you were terrified I’d died?’, he jokes, his grin now very smug. ‘And I thought you didn’t like me’.

Lily blushes, lowering her head and hoping he hadn’t noticed it. Truth was she had misjudged him on the first day, annoyed by the way he acted with that captain badge pinned on his chest. He came from a long family of militars, after all, and he was very young, no matter what his father would praise about his grades in military school, so she had truly believed he didn’t deserve to be a captain, that he had only got there for his family name.

In the last few weeks, though, she was forced to admit he was a good captain. He had the vision for it, good ideas, an efficient way of training everyone and, of course, he was a leader.

‘I have nothing against you, sir — James’.

‘I’m glad to know’, he says, sounding earnest. ‘I am worried about you, you know’.

‘Have I done something wrong?’, she asks, surprised, fear involving her again. Lily had taken care of doing all exercises, overworking herself, all to prove that that stupid rule that forbid women in the army did not make any sense. They needed everyone in the fight against Voldemort, after all, and she would not wait patiently, especially when people like her were one of his targets.

‘No, no, you’ve been perfect, really, no one dedicates as much as you’, he assures her. ‘But you don’t socialize. You stay quiet during dinner. You don’t participate in any of the games', he pauses, before adding again dramatically: 'You don’t laugh at my pranks!’

All of it is true. Lily has purposefully gotten away from everyone, afraid they would notice something different about her, though that quiet soldier, Remus, had tried to talk to her. She just feels she can't risk.

‘I do not think it’s time for pranks, James’, she answers, deciding the last point was probably the easiest.

He shakes his head. ‘We are at war, Evans. If we don’t laugh now, we may not laugh after’.

She supposes he is right. And even though he enjoys more pranks than she thinks it’s reasonable, she knows he worries too. More than once, when she is on guard duty, she has noticed the light of his tent is on very late in the night. James may look carefree with everyone else, but he has concerns about the war — and what lies in his shoulder.

‘Your work has been impeccable’, he adds quietly. ‘I just want you to get to know more of your colleagues and for them to know more about you’. Lily presses her lips, hoping her worry doesn’t show on her face. That was all she was trying to avoid. ‘You will need to count on them in the battlefield and they will need to know you have their backs too. And the only way to do that is if we trust each other. Can we do that?’

James is waiting for her answer, his eyes boring into hers firmly, and Lily can’t turn away now. In the light of the morning, with the sun shining on his face, his hazel eyes seem to glint in gold, the pupil barely visible. He has wrinkles on the side of his eyes, and she suddenly wishes they weren’t meeting in the army while she is pretending to be an introverted thin young man.

He seems the kind of guy she would like to meet in college, or to grow up together with, or even in a dancing club with her friends; they would talk and she could be then fully herself, could share with him her witty side and even help him in a prank or two. In that other life she would appreciate how nice and beautiful he is, with that black hair that’s always messy no matter how much he tries to comb, and those hazel eyes that were made for laughing, not to be worried for the war.

But that’s not her life and she is sure that if he ever finds out about her, he will hate her. Somehow, with how much she has learned to admire him in the last weeks, she fears his rejection more than she fears being expelled from the army.

Lily knows she would trust James Potter with her life, knows she would do her duty and die for him if it was needed, and yet she also knows she can't ever tell him  her secret.

So she does what she has been doing best ever since she joined the army.

‘We can trust each other’, she lies.

He beams. ‘Great, Evans! And I thought we could start sharing your mourning runs’. He raises one eyebrow when she looks surprised. ‘I’ve noticed you awake at dawn to run’.

‘I like to train’, she admits. ‘I am… thinner than the others, so I am trying to get fitter’.

‘You look a lot better’, he compliments, touching her arm, where her biceps have been evolving nicely. It’s a pat, a soft brush, and yet it sends shivers down Lily’s spine; his hand is warm . ‘Mind if I join you?’

She hesitates just a little. ‘I will stay quiet’, she warns him. ‘I like to think while I run’.

‘Works for me. And if you want to share a thought or another, well, I’m here, Evans’.

He winks at her, again so friendly that she turns her eyes away, wishing she could tell him the truth. But she can’t, so she presses her lips, ties the ribbon around her hair so the bun stays in place, and kneels to make sure her shoes are tied. Then she raises and her heart stops for a full second.

James has taken out his shirt. She knows he is fit — there is no way he can’t be with all the years of training he had — and she has seen before shirtless, but only when she was far away in the line, hoping to get unnoticed as she trained the movements.

Now, it’s only him, his tanned skin glistening under the morning sun, a god coming out of her dreams. She is staring and she knows it, but there is no way she can avoid it; weeks at the army have made her lost a lot of discomfourt around men's body, but this... This doesn't seem fair.

She watches the muscles in his arms, his biceps far more evident than hers will ever be, and it suddenly occurs to Lily that she would like very much to feel them around her, involving her, holding her. There would be only benefits in hugging him, she realizes, as her eyes move to his torso, enjoying the firmness of his chest and the muscles in his abdomen, a six pack that seems drawn perfectly. In his arms, she would glide her hand through his chest, would place a kiss over his heart and then she would raise her head and they would be so close —

And then James stretches his arms, raising them above his head, and she notices the hair on his torso, a few patches near his chest that shine with a few drops of sweat she wouldn’t mind drying, and then the darked patch over his abdomen, in a path that goes on vanishing inside…

When she finds herself staring at his pants, Lily decides she has crossed more limits that it's reasonable.

She turns, all her concentration in avoiding glancing at him again, though she feels it's fruitless. The sight of him seems to be recorded in her mind. He will appear on her dream, she is sure of it.

‘Everything all right, Evans?’, he asks, right behind her, and she jumps. 'You look red'.

Lily knows it; her face is hot, burning even before she has started to run, and she won’t fool herself pretending she doesn’t know the reason.

‘I'm fine, let’s go’, she answers quickly, heart racing in her chest. This was a horrible idea; mourning runs with her very gorgeous hot captain will do no good for her keeping her secret.

She sprints without warning, but he catches up with her easily. She keeps her eyes ahead. Don't look, don't stare, don't ogle.

‘There is something special about you, Evans’, he declares, the run not seeming to disturb his breathing. ‘I will find out one day’.

[khentkawes]

Tony Stark-antis need to learn some chill and basic narrative comprehension skills. Like really? Again with this bullshit?

Dude, we are ONE episode into Falcon and the Winter Solider and people are already using it as an excuse to resurrect anti-Tony Stark bad takes. Like... WTF fandom? Do we really have to go through this with every single post-Endgame mcu project? Really? When are ya all gonna learn some comprehension skills and actually pick up on what the narrative is trying to say?

Say it with me: the bank loan scene was a not-very-subtle jab at systemic racism and the way black veterans have been treated in American for decades. It’s not an excuse to anti on about how “tOnY sTaRk DiDnT pAy ThE aVeNgErS CuZ hE’s A eVIL bILLIonAiRe!”

Are you all so afraid of talking about systemic racism that you have to blame Tony Stark for Sam not getting a bank loan? Really? After a year of BLM protests and extensive awareness-raising for systemic racism, and y’all still don’t get it?

That’s the real world issue that the narrative was trying to lay out, and it’s the in-universe explanation for that scene, which is trying to address out-of-universe real-world issues. But now let me be petty and go back to the in-universe issues of whether Sam got paid... because this whole take is just pissing me off and I have to rant. So...

Sam hasn’t had a paying job in seven years, and he chose to leave the Avengers when he defied the Sokovia Accords because he blindly follows everything Cap says without ever thinking for himself. He’s been badly written ever since he showed up at the end of Age of Ultron. And that bad writing means he’s just been playing as Cap’s lackey, and in doing so, he CHOSE to leave the Avengers, to reject a government paycheck, and take his chances on the run for two years as a fugitive. So yeah. Two years, no job, no pay. And as far as we can tell, he didn’t do a whole lot of awesome saving-the-world in those two years either. He was just hiding out with Cap and maybe punching a couple of low-level terrorists or something .There certainly weren’t any alien invasions that he stopped in that time. And after that, he was dust for five years. That’s not his fault, obviously, but no one can expect to collect a paycheck while they don’t exist. That’s why the post-Blip economy is probably a bit wonky at the moment. So in total... seven years. No job. No paycheck. Part of that is consequences of Sam’s actions and part of it was through no fault of his own. But yeah, after seven years with no paycheck, there’s a good chance he’s got money issues. Did banks seize assets of those who were blipped? Totally possible.

But now, in-universe, let’s remember that all this bullshit that antis are spewing about “Tony Stark should have set aside money for his friends and teammates” and “Sam saved the world from aliens so many times, so he deserves a pension” and “Tony could set up a trust fund for all of the avengers because they’re his friends!” Yeah. That’s all 100% BS.

First off, Sam Wilson and Tony Stark are not friends in the MCU. Never have been. In Civil War, Tony said, “I know we don’t know each other very well” because they don’t! They’ve NEVER FOUGHT TOGETHER ON THE SAME TEAM! Think about that. Tony wasn’t an active duty avenger between Age of Ultron and Civil War, and that’s the only time period where Sam was an active avenger. So they were never really “teammates” and they weren't friends. They were, at best, acquaintances or coworkers who never worked closely together.

And during that time, when Tony appears to have had little contact with the avengers, he was bankrolling the team. He says, “what, am I doing here? Running a bed and breakfast for a biker gang?” He made the compound and supplied all of the avengers’ tech. He gave them free room and board. It sure looks like they had everything they needed, so it’s entirely possible (even likely) that Tony was paying the Avengers during this time. But that’s all it was. Two years when Sam was an active avenger, Tony wasn’t, but Tony was still bankrolling the team. After that... Sam was a fugitive and then he was dust. So he spent 7 years with no job, and two of those years were by choice, because of Sam’s rejection of being an avenger and refusal to accept a government paycheck. He chose to be a vigilante with Cap, and vigilantism doesn’t supply a paycheck on its own.

And finally... Sam has never saved the world! And he’s only fought aliens during Infinity War and Endgame. So where are people getting this whole, “but Sam should be paid because hE sAvEd tHe wOrLd!”? Uh, no. Not really. He helped in Endgame. He tried to help in Infinity War. And that’s good. That’s important. It’s not nothing. But it’s also not saving the world. In this first episode of TFATWS, Sam literally accepted thanks from a guy who said “you brought my wife back,” when Sam had nothing to do with that. Bruce snapped and brought back all the dusted. Sam had no role in helping for that. Now I get that Sam was probably just being polite. But it’s contributing to this narrative that Sam did more then he actually did. Naw, man. Marvel never cared about Sam Wilson until five minutes ago. So they’ve never actually shown him doing anything that was, well, important. And that’s a fail on Marvel, but if we’re looking at it from a purely in-universe perspective... Sam Wilson doesn’t deserve any more or less than any other government/military contractor. Because that’s what he is now (he’s not an Avengers because the Avengers no longer exist), and that’s what he was up until the last scene of Age of Ultron. Most of his existence, he’s been a solider. He’s a military guy. So if he’s not been getting paid, that’s on the military. Tony, at most, would have paid him for two years of his time and work. The rest is all on the military, including Sam’s current finances.

Which means, you want to blame someone for Sam’s finances and his inability to get a loan? Well, there are three reasons. 1. Sam chose to leave the Avengers to become a fugitive with Cap, which means he had no job and no paycheck for two years. That’s the consequences of his actions. 2. the military either stopped paying him at some point, or hasn’t been paying him enough/quick enough in the past six months since the Blip. Military pay for veterans and veterans’ access to benefits is a real problem, but it’s a military problem. And it’s possible that any back-pay or pension that Sam is owed is tied up in red tape, which is probably only exacerbated by his time as a fugitive (which might mean he was made ineligible for any pension). And finally 3. systemic racism. His sister was pretty clear on the fact that “people like us” are the ones who always seems to be denied loans. She was saying that there is money available for loans, but it always go to white folks first. Maybe try listening to the black character explain why they believe they aren’t getting paid. Sam (when not on the run or blipped) was living a pretty cushy life as a supporting avenger for two years. He apparently didn’t have to think about how systemic racism could affect his family because he was temporarily insulated from it. Now that layer of protection is gone because he’s not living in a cushy compound away from the real world (which, for the record, is probably a good thing. I think the Avengers being so isolated from the real world is probably partially what led to the problems in Civil War). So now Sam is going to be confronted with the reality that systemic racism is real and can affect anybody, regardless of your fame or your job. And after the past year of discussions on race, the fandom shouldn’t be surprised by this narrative.

I am so sick of every single MCU project post-Endgame being twisted by antis who just want to use it to hate Tony Stark. I mean, seriously. Give it a rest, people! Try reading the narrative the way it was intended and stop twisting it for your hate-Tony-Stark obsession.

[azucanela]

OMG I AM OBSESSED WITH YOUR WRITING YOU ARE DEFINITELY ONE OF THE BEST WRITERS ON TUMBLR NO CAP!!! i love ur zuko fics, and i wanted to request some sokka x reader!!! i want u to have complete creative freedom but i love how you write slowburn omg so some enemies to friends to lovers sokka content would be insaneeee! maybe reader is fire nation (zuko’s cousin/iroh’s daughter??) but joins the gaang after crossroads or something?

AFTER | SOKKA X READER

SUMMARY: Sokka didn’t expect the girl who held a knife to his neck to be the same girl he’d fall for. Y/N didn’t really expect to fall either. 

WORD COUNT: 10k

WARNINGS: injuries, implications of death, kisses, bloodbending, threats of bodily harm, death threats

A/N: time to give sokka the attention and hype he is OWED, also im SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONGGG but this is quite possibly my favorite Y/N. writing for sokka is hard tho. im not sure how much i like this tbh but its really long omg. also thank you!!!! i feel honored to be considered the best :D you are too kind

When she was younger, Y/N joined Azula’s little troupe of girls. Though she wasn’t some loyal little soldier for her to order around, no, Y/N never feared Azula. Nor did she follow her blindly. No, it had always been a struggle for power between the two. Even when her father was booted from the throne as the rightful heir. 

Losing her brother made her wonder if giving up like her father had in Ba Sing Se was the easy way out. Perhaps thats why she promised herself she would never give up. Maybe thats why she challenged Azula to... an unofficial duel when she’d heard her comment. Challenged her and won. 

The new Fire Lord’s pride and joy had lost against his niece, a shame. 

Y/N hadn’t thought much of it, but it probably would’ve explained why Fire Lord Ozai was rather pleased when Y/N had came to him and explained her intents to go alongside her father and cousin in banishment. She was, no matter how unlikely, another potential heir to the throne. And unlike Zuko, an actual threat. Sending her on a journey to find someone who’d been missing for a century was the best way to get rid of her. 

If Y/N was honest, she viewed the banishment as more of a vacation. All her life, she had to deal with banquets, politics, war tactics, all at such a young age. It was tiring, and dull, spending day and night in the palace doing such things. Now, she had the opportunity to travel the world, though her grumpy cousin was rushing them throughout each spot, it was still nice. Zuko certainly didn’t think so, given that they hadn’t found the Avatar yet, not that Y/N believed they ever would but, it is what it is.

A sigh escaped her as she sat, on leg propped up against the other on the deck of the ship, they had arrived in the Southern Water Tribe after seeing an odd light in the distance. Maybe it was cruel, but Y/N sincerely hoped they didn’t find the Avatar. She didn’t want her vacation to end, she didn’t want to return to the politics, and she didn’t want to deal with one of the most powerful people on the planet. Aside from her own desires, Y/N couldn’t help but disapprove of Zuko’s need to please his father, the man who’d hurt him beyond forgiveness.

She sincerely doubted her father approved either. Though their relationship had been strained for some time now. Y/N didn’t hate her father, she doubted that was possible, he was a kind man and a good father. Things between them simply felt... off. She liked to think she’d gotten over it, the initial jealously she felt when she discovered her father intended to join Zuko on his hunt for the Avatar.

When she’d found out from Fire Lord Ozai. 

Sometimes she wondered if her father even intended to say goodbye. But she wasn’t a fool, Y/N knew he had recently lost a son, they were both hurting and Zuko needed someone who wasn’t going to hurt him if he did something wrong. Though, Y/N saw him try to save the lives of the soldiers of the so-called great Fire Nation, not do something wrong. Regardless, Zuko needed a father figure, yes. But Y/N needed a father as she grappled with the death of her brother. 

Maybe she was just a little bitter about it. 

“Are you coming?” Zuko asked, his words coming out harshly.

Raising a brow, Y/N shook her head, “no. Don’t get too violent, though.” She warned, looking at him pointedly, “they’re a small tribe that’s going extinct.” 

Zuko rolled his eyes as he exclaimed, “that’s not my fault!”

Sitting up to face him, Y/N smacked him upside the head as she walked past him, “considering the royal family, which you are a part of need I remind you, ordered the genocide of every single Waterbender they had...” She paused, cracking her knuckles before turning to look back at Zuko, “I would say you that everyone here probably blames you for it by assosiation.” Y/N reasoned. She had never liked the history that her ancestors had, much less approved.

Taken aback, Zuko exclaimed, “you’re a part of the royal family too!”  Y/N was well aware of the circumstances surrounding his banishment, he’d tried to save lives, but war was the only thing that mattered to the Fire Nation it appeared. 

His attempt at defense simply earned him a shrug, “perhaps.” Y/N didn’t consider herself a member of the royal family, and she doubted her father did either. And no matter what Zuko thought, though he was royal by blood, his banishment severed his ties to the throne permanently.

Unless they happened to find the Avatar, though that wasn’t very likely, Y/N decided she would rethinking her life choices should the Avatar be here of all places, as she rested her forearms on the side of the ship and watched Zuko march down his soldiers.

She wasn’t going to tell him that the Southern Water Tribe didn’t have a military, much less benders. As previously mentioned, the genocide destroyed the benders, and the most of the soldiers in the village had headed off to fight in the war against the Fire Nation. Though her brow did raise as she watched him yank an old lady from the small crowd of people, Y/N straightened her back, preparing to get involved. 

Of course, a young warrior ended up running at her cousin, war paint and all as he attempted to attack. Key word being attempted. Watching him fall face first into the snow, Y/N realized he wasn’t a warrior, but a boy. The Avatar also happened to be a boy. A very, very young boy. Not a century year old Airbender. 

Y/N supposed it was time to start rethinking her life. 

Sokka didn’t know what he was supposed to do as he helped Princess Yue onto the Sky Bison. They needed to find Aang’s physical body, quickly, otherwise he wouldn’t be returning to the real world, and they happened to be fresh out of Avatars up until recently so that wasn’t really an option. Not when they needed the balance of the world to be restored immediately. 

Sighing, Sokka moved to get onto the Sky Bison, only to be yanked backwards, stumbling before having a knife pressed to his neck. “What the hell!” He exclaimed in shock, garnering the attention of the others that were already on Appa. Katara’s mouth gaping open at the sight of him as Princess Yue cried out in shock.

The knife against his neck is certainly uncomfortable, and he realizes that he probably should’ve stuck around Kyoshi Island long enough to learn how to get out a situation like this. “I’m coming with you. Someone has to make sure Zuko doesn’t do anything else dumb.” Comes a voice from behind him, and Sokka’s brows furrowed in confusion, who was this? And why were they trying to kill him? More importantly, how did they know Prince Zuko, the guy who had been chasing them since Aang had come out of that iceberg. Questions ran rampant through his mind, and he nearly forgot that his life was being threatened.

That was a luxury he couldn’t afford at the moment. 

Though he couldn’t see the person behind him, he could see Katara grimace at her demand, anyone associated with Prince Zuko likely had a similar end goal, to capture the Avatar. This wasn’t something they could allow, and Sokka recognized this as Katara asked, “why should we trust you?” Katara’s eyes soon met Sokka’s and he knew that no matter what he said, she would give into the girl’s demands for his safety. Sokka mentally scolded himself for failing to prevent this situation. 

The girl behind him scoffed, “unlike my dear cousin,” Sokka couldn’t help the shock that flooded him, cousin? As in Zuko is this girl’s cousin? Or did she mean someone else? He was kidding himself, there was no one else it could be. “I like banishment, it’s like a fun little vacation. I could care less about the Avatar.” The knife draws in closer to Sokka’s neck, nearly drawing blood, likely expressing the fact that she could care less if Katara believed her. Though Sokka doubted she didn’t care about the Avatar, he was one of the most important people in the world. 

But Sokka would likely die if she didn’t agree, or at least end up fatally injured. No matter how far Katara had come with her Waterbending, she hadn’t perfected it yet, and healing was only so effective. Sokka sincerely doubted she could beat the speed of this girl and her weapon considering the fact that she’d gotten the jump on them the first time around. Death wasn’t something he wanted, but anyone who knew Zuko couldn’t be trusted, much less someone who shared his blood. If he turned out... like that, Sokka didn’t want to imagine how this stranger ended up.

“Don’t try anything.” Katara warned, eyeing the girl wearily. Though it was an empty threat for the most part, in the air, there was little Katara could do against a foe. Though three, well two if you exclude the princess, against one seemed like favorable odds, this girl seemed talented in combat, even without bending.

She released Sokka, and he turned to see her beaming up at Katara, “happy to be doing business with ya.” Turning to Sokka, she looked him up and down, sizing him up before speaking, “be a gentleman and help me up?” Yeah, she was crazy. The pretty ones are always crazy. That, and she was Zuko’s cousin, it made sense. Though Sokka was fairly sure that she was joking, you could never be too sure.

“Who even are you?!” He exclaimed, exasperated and preparing to whip out his boomerang as he glared at her. He didn’t recognize her, but she’d likely been traveling with Zuko for quite some time now if they were related.

She just shrugged, “you can call me Y/N.” She got onto Appa with ease, Katara on guard a she eyed her, eyes piercing into her soul, Y/N raised a brow upon noticing this, “calm down. I wouldn’t have killed him.”

Katara inhaled deeply, trying to maintain patience as Sokka got into the saddle, “yip, yip.”

Y/N wasn’t really shocked when it turned out Azula was after them. Of course good old Uncle Ozai sent his most valuable asset to bring them back. Though some good at come of it, Zuko cut his ponytail, something Y/N had taken pleasure in bullying him over. Now they were on the run, in the very city that her father had tried to run to the ground all those years ago. 

Irony at its finest.

Tugging at the sleeves of her Earth Kingdom garments, Y/N sighed, walking through the streets of the city. She didn’t know where she was if she was honest, and standing in the beautiful plaza, Y/N wondered if maybe, it would be better if she never returned back to that horrid apartment. Her father was starting over, getting them all jobs at a tea shop, even Zuko had tried to move on, going out on a date with a girl. 

The Earth Kingdom was an odd place, but here, no one knew who she was. It wouldn’t be difficult to restart, alone. Without the expectations she’d been raised with. Fists balling up, Y/N exhaled slowly, turning a corner. There wasn’t graffiti in this part of the city, she realized, staring at the walls. Though there was an odd poster, squinting at it, she moved closer. It was a poorly drawn image of-

A Sky Bison. The same one she’d ridden on back during the Siege of the North, not that any others existed, the Sky Bison were a dying breed. Which could only mean one thing, the Avatar was in Ba Sing Se. 

"Have you seen him?” She heard from behind her. Y/N recognized the voice, it belonged to the boy she’d held at knife point, “the drawing isn’t my best but-”

Turning around she spoke rapidly, “don’t freak out.” This was a problem.

Y/N liked to think she was the least threatening of the Royal Family, aside from her father that is. Though they could both be lethal in their own ways, neither demonstrated the true extents of their power unless it was truly necessary. Maybe that’s why Y/N hoped that the boy, Sokka, she believed his name was, wouldn’t freak out.

Of course, he did. Dropping the posters in his hand, he opened his mouth, likely to scream, only for Y/N to practically tackle him. She slammed his body against the wall, covering his mouth with her hand as she glared at him. Sokka let out a grunt of surprise, immediately beginning to struggle in her hold, “calm down! I don’t have a knife this time around.” Y/N cried out, her voice a hushed whisper. Of course, what she said was a lie, she always had at least three weapons on her. Upon entering the city, she’d knocked that number down to only two weapons, much to her dismay and Iroh’s relief.

She felt him lick her hand, and she quickly removed her hand in disgust, while keeping the other planted on his shoulder, they both exclaimed, “what the hell!”

Sokka’s eyes narrowed at her, “look. I don’t wanna cause a scene, so I’m just gonna go-” He sighed when her hand remained on his shoulder, firmly holding him against the wall as he tried to move away only to be pushed back into the wall. “Or not.” 

“Look, you cannot go back to your little group and tell them that I’m here.” Y/N tried to choose her words carefully, if she didn’t need to, she didn’t want to suggest that her father and Zuko were also in the city. “I’m trying to have a permanent vacation, away from the Fire Nation and my crazy family, in Ba Sing Se.” She explained, slowly removing her hand from his shoulder, “think you can respect that?”

He looked at her wearily, during their last interaction, she’d made no attempts to actually injure them. And when she had the Avatar right in front of her, unlike Zuko, she hadn’t tried to kidnap him. Y/N had been honest last time, and chances were, she was being honest now. That didn’t make him feel any better about trusting her though. 

“How do I know you won’t follow me and kill me in my sleep?”

Y/N looked at him incredulously, “is that a joke?” She’d considered that too though, the possibility that he’d follow her back to her shared apartment and alert his friends of their location. Y/N refused to be the reason that they lost their new lives in Ba Sing Se, and had already decided to check into an inn for the night. 

Raising a brow at her, Sokka gestured for her to give him an answer, and Y/N stared at him momentarily, “well. How do I know you won’t kill me in my sleep?” Y/N retorted.

Sokka rolled his eyes at her, “I’m a good person.” Came his response.

“Debatable.” 

Sokka stared at her in disbelief, “I’m trying to save the world here!” He exclaimed, and Y/N wasn’t shocked by his response, her goal had been to fluster him and she had.

Tilting her head at him, Y/N replied, “sure.” Stretching her arms upwards, she waves to him, “don’t tell your friends I was here, and we’re good.” She began to walk further into the alley, towards the other side, “see you around.” If he was here, his friends were probably around the area as well, meaning she had to leave.

His mouth gaped open and he stared at her figure as she stalked off, pausing momentarily before groaning and running after her, ending up at her side. “What do you mean, sure?” Sokka asked, confusion laced in his tone. 

Y/N raised a brow at him. “What are you doing?”  She wanted to laugh at his reaction, though he was now following her liked a lovesick puppy, which could prove problematic. 

Crossing his arms he responded, “making sure you don’t do anything bad.” Sokka eyed her suspiciously, “because I am a good person.” He asserted.

“And I’m a bad person?”

She already knew he was going to say, ‘yes, yes you are.’ After all, she was from the Fire Nation, and Y/N had no doubt she’d done terrible things in her life, especially when she’d fallen into a dark place and taken on... less than favorable coping mechanisms. 

And he’s silent for a moment, leaving Y/N to wonder if he suddenly cares about the feelings of the enemy. Only for him to say, “in my experience... good people can do bad things.” 

That wasn’t what she expected. Y/N found herself stunned, speechless as she looked to Sokka, though he simply continued to walk alongside her nonchalantly. Quickly collecting herself, she looks away from him and to the nearby food stand, “that didn’t answer my question.” And as Sokka opened his mouth to likely continue his statement, Y/N realized she didn’t want to know the answer as she spoke, “you want food? I want food. Let’s get food.”

Sighing, Sokka followed her, “as long as you don’t poison me.”

Y/N’s brows furrowed at his comment, looking back at him, “do you-” A small laugh escaped her, “do you think I just carry around poison?” 

Sokka didn’t know why he swelled with pride when he made her laugh, “in case you run into your enemies, absolutely.” It was probably because she was the enemy, and it took real talent to make someone who hated you laugh. 

“How often do you think I run into my enemies and invite them to get food with me?” She asked, picking up a few things from the stand, before heading over to pay.

Frowning, Sokka watches her pay, “I thought we were bonding over,” he paused to take a meat bun from her and shove it into her face dramatically, “meat! Yet, I’m still your enemy.”

Y/N simply shrugged, “this is a one time thing.”

It was not a one time thing. 

Sokka found himself ‘coincidentally’ running into Y/N, more and more often. She’d be walking through the streets of the upper ring about once a week, though she had started walking through the streets of the inner ring of Ba Sing Se far more frequently than normal in recent weeks. He’d been meaning to ask her why, maybe she’d also grown accustomed to their meetings and started to come around more. During their meetups they’d talk, about things other than the war, which was a conversation difficult to come by with the others. Though he cared for his friends, talking to Y/N felt different, a good different. She wasn’t overbearing like Katara, or mean like Toph, but she also wasn’t as passive as Aang. 

It was odd. Knowing someone who had once held a knife to your neck in a more friendly way. Though, if Sokka was honest, he didn’t trust her, and she likely didn’t trust him either. They’d both taken precautions due to the mistrust between them, not that be blamed her. At the end of the day, they were still on opposing sides, kind of. Y/N had never seemed to care about finding the Avatar, but she was certainly loyal to her family above all else.

She’d demonstrated that in the Northern Water Tribe. 

Sokka was the same, if he had saw an inkling of betrayal as a possibility, he wouldn’t hesitate to tell the others. Their safety was his priority at the end of the day, and Y/N didn’t owe him anything, just like he didn’t owe her anything. Maybe that was the beauty of it all. But for now, everything remained peaceful, calming, and simple.

Of course, all good things must come to an end. 

Katara had oddly disappeared after Aang arrived with news of his vision. And then, as though things couldn’t get any weirder, Iroh arrived, Y/N’s apparent Father Iroh. Toph seemed to know him well, which certainly came as a shock to Sokka and Aang. “I need your help, Prince Zuko has been captured.” He explained, opening his mouth to continue only for Sokka to interrupt. He couldn’t help it when his brows furrowed in both confusion and frustration, Y/N had never suggested that the rest of her family was here.

“Are you crazy? You guys were trying to capture Aang not to long ago!” Sokka pointed out, throwing his arms outwards, “why not get Y/N to help?” She was certainly capable of raiding the palace and retrieving her cousin.

At this comment, Iroh’s face darkened, “we were separated in the palace. I’m unsure if they managed to capture her or if she escaped.” Oh. So that’s what he was going to say. 

Sokka couldn’t help it when his face dropped, looking to Iroh he exclaimed, “well- why didn’t you lead with that!” Pushing past Aang who had been prepared to start giving a speech on why they should assist Iroh, only for his mouth to gape open as Sokka headed for the door.

“Why are you so eager?” Toph asked as they began to follow him out the door.

He faltered, quickly trying to think up a good excuse as he replied, “no reason.” 

Toph’s frowned, “I can tell when you’re lying Sokka.” She reminded him. 

“We can discuss this later!” He exclaimed, flustered. “Let’s go.”

Y/N had contemplated killing Zuko before. 

It had never really been serious, as far as she would’ve gone was maybe injuring him badly enough that she got her point across. But at the end of the day, she protected Zuko to the best of her ability, and tried to keep his mind from being poisoned by the Fire Nation ideals that she’d once lived by unquestionably. 

Now she actually wanted him dead. He stood alongside Azula, who had offered Y/N her spot in her little gang hours ago, though she’d rejected the offer much to Azula’s chagrin. But she seemed sure that Y/N would accept some time soon. Perhaps it was because Zuko had betrayed her father and left him to the Dai Li. 

He had betrayed her father, the man who had practically raised both of them. 

Y/N had a violent past, she wouldn’t deny, and she liked to think that she was past all that. But looking at the situation ahead of them, watching the Waterbender, Sokka’s sister, Katara, cry over the body of the Avatar, she realized that maybe violence was the answer. Just this once. 

So, when she hopped in front of them, she had a plan. A violent one. 

“Pull yourself together.” She snapped at Katara, who looked up at her, bloodshot eyes and tears streaming down her confused face, “he’s getting out of here alive. But first, I need you to soak them.” Y/N gestured towards the troops coming towards them, Zuko and Azula accompanying them. Katara opened her mouth, and Y/N didn’t care what she was going to say as she ordered, “now!” 

Katara’s brows drew together as she released the Avatar’s head onto her lap, raising her hands to use the waterfall behind them to successfully drench the soldiers, who groaned at the discomfort but pausing temporarily before they continued towards them. “What did you think that would accomplish? What a pitiful-” Azula’s taunts were paused when she watched as Y/N drew her hands together, inhaling deeply, and Azula stopped her movement. “That’s not possible.” 

Suddenly, lightning was between Y/N’s fingertips, and she extended her hand into the large puddle of water that Katara had created. Y/N had learnt to bend lightning soon after she’d mastered Firebending, from her father, he’d insisted that she only use it when necessary, so she kept her ability to herself. This was necessary, she decided, hand touching the water and sending a shock throughout everyone with it, successfully putting all of the soldiers out of commission. 

Unfortunately, Azula recognized the signs of lightning bending, and withdrew alongside Zuko, and the two were now coming to attack from above at a rapid rate. Y/N whipped her head around to see Katara, mouth gaped open at all the fallen soldiers. “You two need to leave, I’ll hold them off.” She began to move to create another strike of lightning

“No.” Called out another voice, and Y/N whipped her head over to see it was her father, Dai Li agents likely nearby as he moved in front of Y/N. “You all need to leave. Take Y/N with you, she will help the Avatar reach his destiny.” Y/N wanted to laugh at that, how could he be so sure? If the boy did die, then this would all be for nothing

Y/N scoffed, “are you crazy?” She moved closer to her father, “unlike Zuko, I’m not leaving you.” She exclaimed, exasperated. 

Iroh simply smiled at her as he said, “I’m proud of you, Y/N.” 

Sokka knew he seemed dumb. He knew how others perceived him, as the ‘extra’ member of Team Avatar, the useless one, because he lacked bending. At the end of the day, Sokka was the brains of their operations, he was observant, and this helped him develop plans that most people would never even consider.

Not that anyone else knew, but Sokka was the only one that had actually interacted with Y/N prior to what happened in Ba Sing Se. Sure, they’d all met once or twice in the past, but Sokka had a knife to his throat then, so Y/N probably didn’t seem that appealing to the others. And he doubted they understood how odd it was that she was so... apathetic. Normally she’d tease, and joke alongside him but now? 

It was odd, and nobody else could notice the shift in her personality but him, and he was concerned. Y/N had lost her father, and been betrayed by her cousin, and she had yet to talk about it, at all. Sokka liked to think that they were close enough to discuss such things, and he’d tried to get some sort of emotion out of her, the key word being tried. 

Despite her apathetic personality, the others had warmed up to her for the most part. Apparently Toph had met Y/N in the past, during the time she’d run off and encountered Iroh. So, the two got acquainted fairly fast, Aang was happy to have a Firebender, and insisted that once he was back to full strength, and they’d found a better place for practice, he’d learn Firebending from her. Y/N had agreed but it was clear Aang wasn’t as excited as he was acting, Sokka figured he still associated the time he hurt Katara with Firebending.

Katara had been far less weary of Y/N than Sokka had expected, but given what Katara had told him when she’d first joined, that made sense. Y/N was a powerful Firebender who had betrayed her entire nation to help save Aang’s life, and though Katara didn’t approve of everything she’d done in the past, she tolerated her. Which was better than nothing in Sokka’s book.

They were currently camped out in the woods beside a Fire Nation town, everyone had scattered to prepare for the few nights they’d likely stay in the area. Katara had gone to the town with Toph and Aang, in search of supplies and food, while Sokka and Y/N set up the camp and collected wood to help start a fire. Y/N had insisted that she could maintain the fire without any wood, but Sokka viewed this as an excuse to get her alone and force her to discuss her feelings.

“So...” Sokka mumbled, looking to her as she leaned down to pick up another piece of wood, “lovely weather we’re having.”

Y/N turned to him, raising a brow before nodding, “yeah.” It was clear she wasn’t entirely paying attention the nonsense that was coming out of his mouth as he tried to get her to listen to him. 

Sokka grabbed another piece of wood, “how have you been?”

Tilting her head at him in confusion, Y/N brought another piece of wood into her arms, “fine.” Looking up at the dimming sky she frowned, “we should start heading back to that spot we’d found earlier.” Y/N turned to begin walking, and Sokka struggled to match her pace.

His brows furrowed in frustration as he stared at her, the light of the falling sun filtering in between the trees and onto them. Y/N seemed to glow as she maneuvered between the trees, “how have you been sleeping?” Even Sokka sounded confused at the question he asked, but he didn’t know how to broach the topic with Y/N.

She simply paused her movement, turning to him, he stumbled slightly due to the abrupt stop, and met her eyes. “Just ask what you wanna ask, Sokka. Stop dancing around whatever it is.” Y/N sounded tired, looking to him expectantly as she awaited his question. Sokka scolded himself for being so obvious that she’d noticed something was up. 

He sighed, “are you okay?” And she opened her mouth to respond but he continued, “actually? You can say that you are okay, and not mean it. Y/N you lost your dad and were betrayed by your cousin, and you-” Sokka grimaced as he met her eyes, “you haven’t been the same since you joined us.”

Y/N is silent for a moment, then her eyes were piercing into his, “how would you know that I haven’t been the same?” She asked, turning away to continue walking back to the chosen campsite, “it’s not like you know me.” His statement had set her off it appeared, but her response had easily done the same for him. 

“Are you serious? Not like I know you?” He scoffed, jogging to catch up with her, “I know that you do whatever it takes to protect the people you care about. I know that you really like Earth Kingdom food because most of the food within the Fire Nation is on the spicier side.” Y/N didn’t seem to be listening, and the camp was in sight, but Sokka continued, “I know that you get really cold easily unless you regulate your body temperature with your Firebending. And I know that you can’t pick a favorite color because you are very indecisive.” 

Aggressively, Y/N dropped the sticks into the center of the campsite as they arrived, turning to him, “you can stop now.” Her voice was almost taunting as she spoke, sarcastic in a way. 

Sokka simply followed suit, placing the firewood in the center and facing her head on, “and most importantly, I know what it’s like to lose someone.” He takes her hand, and Y/N practically growls at the contact, attempting to yank her hand out of his grasp, she ends up pulling him closer towards her. Sokka clumsily topples onto her, knocking the both of them down into the dirt with a grunt. His forearms preventing him from crushing Y/N under his body weight as he held himself up, his eyes meet hers.

Y/N finds herself glaring daggers at him, while Sokka finishes his little speech with, “you don’t have to deal with this alone.”

And in that moment, he looks at her, really looks at her. And she’s really pretty.

Y/N opens her mouth to say something to him, only for someone else to begin speaking, “are we interrupting something?” Toph. Looking up, Sokka sees the others as well, Aang looks rather smug as he wiggles his eyebrows at Sokka, and Katara gives him a pointed look, likely disappointed that he’d fraternizing with the former enemy. He can’t help it when he feels his cheeks warm, and before he can move to get off Y/N, she’s launched him off of her, and he’s flat on his back on the ground. Toph laughs at the actions, bending a seat of earth for herself and the others before falling backwards into it, the girl seems to wish she had popcorn as she watched the moment unfold.

“No.” Y/N mumbles, bringing herself to her feet and dusting herself off. “I’ll be in my tent if you need me.” She retreats into one of the tents they’d set up earlier, and Sokka groans as he lets his head fall backwards into the ground and runs his hands over his face.

When he removes them, Aang is standing over him, along with Toph, while Katara organizes the firewood. “So... did we interrupt something?” Toph asked.

Sokka just sighs, his plan failed. This time at least. Next time, his goal would be to make her laugh, to make her smile. At least she had expressed some emotion, anger was better than nothing.

Anger seemed to turn to annoyance, since Y/N doesn’t leave her tent until nightfall and Sokka can’t help but wonder what was entertaining enough to keep her in there for all that time. When she does exit, she uses her Firebending to light a fire, and uses the firewood they’d collected earlier to ensure it stays alight. The rest of the group was seated around the center of the campsite, and Sokka wonders if she’s going to go back to her tent when she realizes the only open seat is next to him. 

She doesn’t return to her tent though and he’s grateful. Though she sits as far as possible from him on the bench that Toph had created, half-heartedly listening to the things that the others are saying. Y/N can feel herself getting cold and can’t help the resent that bubbles up in her chest as she recalls what Sokka send earlier. Exhaling deeply, a puff of blue fire escapes her mouth and Y/N feels nauseous at the small reminder of Azula. 

This catches Sokka’s attention, though the others are too enraptured in the story Aang was telling, Sokka turned to her, “cold?” He asked, leaning to the side to grab a blanket from his small pack, he offers it to her.

Y/N knew she wouldn’t be able to regulate her temperature when she fell asleep, but accepting the blanket from Sokka felt like... it felt like accepting him and everything he had said about her. So, when she doesn’t take the blanket from his hands, Sokka sighs, moving to put it back, only for Y/N to snatch the blanket from his hand and wrap it around herself begrudgingly.

This was her way of apologizing, moving closer to Sokka on the small bench she huffed as she pulled the blanket tighter around herself and turned her attention to Aang. She’d been mean, she wouldn’t deny, but what was she supposed to say? Exhaling deeply, Y/N closes her eyes temporarily, allowing drowsiness to consume her for a moment, before looking back to Aang.

It isn’t until Sokka feels a weight fall onto his shoulder midway through his own story that he realizes Y/N has fallen asleep, his mouth gaping open in shock as he pauses his words. He quickly shakes off the shock, cheeks warming as he turns back to the rest of the group, who all regard him curiously. Aang once again wiggles his eyebrows and Sokka ignores the action, continuing his story. Though he’s more weary of his vivid hand movements in fear of awakening Y/N, and noticeably quiets his voice. Sokka finds himself wishing he was Y/N as he listens to Katara’s Water Tribe horror story intently, after all, this is the most peaceful he’s ever seen her. 

It doesn’t last long, because she’s soon startled awake, hand going to her side where she keeps her dagger as she and Toph speak simultaneously, “someone’s coming.”

As an old woman emerges from the shadows, Sokka practically holds Y/N down to keep her from lunging at her and attacking as the woman speaks. And of course, Y/N’s distaste for the woman doesn’t stop there, even when she invites them into her home, though Sokka doesn’t blame her. She’s a suspicious woman. 

It’s not until he and Aang are attacking each other that Sokka regrets preventing Y/N from attacking the old woman when she had the chance. Katara is struggling to move, and Sokka can only hope that Toph and Y/N return from the cave soon as he yelps upon nearly making contact with Aang, the old woman laughing cynically. Sokka watches as she shifts, hand outstretching behind her, “don’t think I forgot you little Firebender.” 

His eyes widen in both shock and fear as Y/N’s body is suddenly thrown onto the ground in front of him. Her body rising almost mechanically, back to a stand, Sokka realizes there’s lightning at her fingertips, the woman manipulating her body to aim for Sokka. “A shame you’ll be the woman to end your friend’s life isn’t it,” She’s making eye contact with Katara who is crying out and begging for her to stop.

Sokka can see the panic in Y/N’s eyes as the her hands aim towards him, “Y/N. It’s okay.” He calls out her, in an attempt at assurance that he doubts does much to soothe her. “It’s okay.” He repeats, squeezing his eyes shut as he prepares for the lightning to hit him. Except it never does, instead, it goes upwards into the sky as Y/N cries out in pain, having moved her body despite the woman blending her blood. 

She had overpowered Hama’s bloodbending, something that clearly came as a shock to the old woman as Y/N turned around sluggishly, staring at the shocked old woman as blue fire left her mouth once more, chest heaving. Sokka could feel the weight on his bones slowly disappear, leaving behind an ache, the woman likely intended to focus her abilities onto Y/N, who was struggling to walk towards her. 

“Scared?” Y/N asked, looking up at the woman, “you should be.”

The next time that Team Avatar feared Y/N. She was face to face with Zuko.

He’d approached them as they sat in the Air Temple. And Y/N had practically jumped out of her seat, preparing for a fight as lightning seemed to dance at her fingertips. Though Sokka knew better than to allow her to attack her cousin, and grabbed her arm. “Can you guys handle this?” He asks the others, maintaining eye contact with Y/N. The others looked to them understanding what would likely occur if Y/N was allowed to be involved.

Zuko wouldn’t walk away from that fight. 

“We got this Sokka.” Katara assured, pure hate in her eyes as she stared Zuko down, and Sokka couldn’t help but wonder if maybe he should remove both of them from the situation. 

Sokka’s hand found Y/N’s, and it was almost burning hot, a sparks seeming to fly between them, he pulls at her hand. Y/N hesitantly allows him to drag her away, though she turns back momentarily to meet Zuko’s eyes. “I’ll kill you later, cousin.” She promises, and her voice is scarily calm. “For my father.” The condescending tone in her voice and the wince Zuko has in response is enough for Sokka to know that her intent was to hurt him emotionally if she couldn’t do it physically, and it was clear she had been successful.

Inhaling deeply, Y/N closes her eyes temporarily as Sokka brings her into one of many abandoned rooms in the temple, sitting her down onto a bed before kneeling down in front of her. “Are you good?” He asks. 

“That’s a stupid question.” Comes her response.

Sokka tilts his head at her, giving her a smile, “well I’m a stupid guy.” 

He’s rubbing gentle circles in her hand as she shakes her head, a small laugh escaping her, “no you’re not.” Her voice cracks and she cringes at the sound so she clears her throat, staring at the wall beside her. Sokka can’t help the way his heart swells at this comment, because for once he doesn’t feel like the comic relief, he doesn’t feel like the side character. Though he appreciates the rest of Team Avatar and loves them all dearly, at times, they didn’t take him seriously. 

Y/N makes him feel important. Though he doesn’t say this as he looks at her, clearly shaken by Zuko’s sudden appearance, she speaks once more, “are you sure I can’t kill him?”

This time Sokka laughs, shaking his head, “I’m sure Katara would love to help you with that, but I doubt Aang would approve.” 

Y/N nods slowly, letting out a shaky breath as a tear escaped her, though she quickly wiped it away and looks to the ground. “You wanna sit with me?” She asks, patting the spot on the bed beside her. 

“Sure.” He replies softly, moving to sit on the bed with her. One he’s situated, Y/N leans her head onto his shoulder, and Sokka finds his hand wrapping around her waist. And they sit like this for several moments. 

Taking a deep breath, Y/N removes her head from his shoulder and looks to him, “thank you.”

Sokka raises a brow, “for what?”

“Being here.” She replies, bringing her hand to move a hair from his face, Sokka watches her actions intently and in awe. “With me.” Her hand remains on his face for longer than necessary, and when she moves to let it fall back into her lap, Sokka’s hand cups hers. 

They’re both silent when Sokka’s hand releases hers, and his other hand leaves her waist, both coming to her face. The look in his eyes tells her enough, and she nods to him. 

The kiss felt like the first breath of fresh air in a while. Maybe it’s because it had been long overdue, but as Y/N brought her hands to his arms to pull him closer, she felt her head empty of all thoughts. 

He pulls away momentarily, their foreheads resting against each others, he can see her eyes are shut, lashes pressed against her cheeks. “I hope,” Sokka pauses, and her eyes flutter open to look at him, he can feel his cheek warm as he continues, “I hope I can always be here, with you.” It’s a confession in its own way, and Sokka understands the weight of his words as he watches her reaction. 

She opens her mouth, likely to reply, be closes it quickly, and Sokka can’t help the panic that floods him. Though this is quickly replaced by the feeling of her lips on his as her hand collides with his chest and pushes him down on the bed, earning a grunt from him. 

“Guys, Zuko is gone-” Y/N throws herself onto the floor as she rolls off Sokka, and he sits up immediately. “Am I interrupting something now?” Aang asked, giving Sokka a look.

Y/N clears her throat, “no.” Sokka couldn’t help it when his brows drew together at this comment, bringing a hand to his temple as he sighed, and Y/N stood, dusting off her thighs as she mumbled, “see you guys later.”

She started avoiding him after that. 

When Zuko joined the group, she’s also made a point to avoid him no matter how hard he tried to apologize to her. And of course, when Sokka first showed him to his room they had a... chat. To put it simply, Sokka had threatened him. 

Just a little. 

“So yeah, here it is, your room.” Gesturing to the room, Sokka gave Zuko a tight lipped smile, watching him wearily. 

Zuko’s back was to him as he placed his stuff down, “thank you.” He said, expecting that to be the end of it, upon hearing the door close he assumed Sokka had left.

When he turned around, Sokka was still very much there. “Let’s have a chat, Prince Zuko.” It didn’t go unnoticed by Sokka how the boy grimaced at the use of his title, though that didn’t stop him from moving forward and placing a hand on Zuko’s shoulder a little too tightly. “Y/N does not want to speak with you.”

“I know,” Came his reply. “Thank you for keeping her from... killing me. The other day. I intend to apologize-”

A small laugh escaped Sokka, “next time. I won’t stop her.” This was for multiple reasons, one of which being that Y/N was avoiding him, and the other being that he wished to respect her and her feeling about Zuko. “And you need to respect her wishes. One of those wishes being, avoiding you. Until she approaches you, leave her be.”

Zuko’s brows furrowed at this comment, “she’s my cousin. You can’t expect-”

“Leave. Her. Be.” 

Zuko became silent, nodding slowly as he looked to Sokka curiously. 

And now, to avoid some of his problems and solve some of them, Sokka ended up running away in a hot air balloon with the person he related to the most at the moment, and the person he threatened rather recently. Zuko. Both of them were being avoided by someone important in their lives, and they both had slightly crazy younger sisters. Though their conversations were certainly... odd.

“My first girlfriend turned into the moon.”

Zuko looked at him for a moment before saying, “that’s rough, buddy.” There was silence after this, a temporary lapse in conversation that Zuko seemed determined to fill. “So...” Zuko mumbled. “You and my cousin huh.” 

It wasn’t a question, Sokka realized this, but he disregarded it as he responded, “what about us?” Playing dumb would hopefully get him to drop the subject. 

Zuko raised his brows at Sokka, “us?” 

Scolding himself, Sokka realized he’d unintentionally dug a deeper hole for himself when he said this as he tried to avoid Zuko’s gaze. “Not really.” Sokka replied, “she’s avoiding me too.” 

Nodding, Zuko gave him a tight lipped smile, “what did you do?”

“I wish I knew.” Sokka could only make assumptions about why Y/N had begun to avoid him, but at the end of the day was confused over it.

He really needed to talk to her. 

As the day of Sozin’s Comet drew closer, Sokka had started trying to talk to Y/N more and more, she’d keep basic conversation but whenever he tried to address... the kiss, Y/N would shut down the conversation. And now, it was the day of Sozin’s Comet, and they established that Zuko and Katara would take on Azula, Aang would take on Ozai, and the rest of them would go after the army that was heading for the Earth Kingdom. 

It seemed that Sokka intended to try to speak with her once more as he approached her while she strapped a dagger to her thigh. “We need to talk.” He said, plopping down onto a rock beside her.

“About battle strategy?” She asked, looking to him, “I had some ideas.”

Play dumb, play dumb, play dumb.

Sokka’s brows furrowed as he shook his head, “about the kiss, Y/N.” Y/N tried to hide her shock at his forwardness, he’d never been this blunt before, during his previous attempts to discuss this with her. Turning to him, she prepared to speak but he silenced her, “you’re going to listen this time.” Grimacing, he looked away, towards the horizon. “I don’t know what’s going to happen today. And if something goes wrong, I need you to know-”

“Nothing is going wrong.” Y/N stated firmly. “Nothing. So, we can have this conversation after.” 

Sokka sat up from his place on the rock, moving in front of her, “there’s no way to guarantee that Y/N.” 

Squeezing her eyes shot, Y/N took a deep breath, “I’ll make sure nothing happens to you guys.” She promised, “and I swear we can talk about this after.” She grabs onto his hands, holding them in hers as she looks away. Y/N knew why she was avoiding it. He was right, it was totally possible for one of them to die, and a relationship in the midst of a war was the worst possible idea. After would be better, or at least that’s what she’d told herself.

The pleading look in his eyes almost burns through her resolve as he asks, “will we?” It almost hurts that he doesn’t believe her, but Y/N can’t blame him.

“We need to go.” Her voice was almost a whisper as she releases his hands. Even if she wanted to continue discussing the subject, they needed to begin the battle soon. 

Sokka frowned though, “if you don’t want this, just tell me and I’ll-” He sighed, bringing a hand to his temple. “I’ll stop bothering you.”

Y/n began to shake her head, “you are never a bother to me I just-” Sighing, she looked into his eyes, “I want this. I do, I’m just scared, and we’re in the middle of a war Sokka!” She exclaimed, the words spilling out of her mouth before she can stop them.

“You think I don’t know that?” Sokka cried out, exasperated. “Y/N I’m so scared that something is going to go wrong, and I’ll never get to tell you that I-”

“Don’t say it.” She interrupts, fear in her veins as she watches him.

So, he didn’t. 

If she didn’t feel like she had something to come back to, maybe that would make it easier. Sacrifices would have to be made to reach victory, and Y/N wouldn’t hesitate to be the one to make them if it meant the others survived. They deserved to see the new world, the world of peace, prosperity, and freedom, the one that came after all this.

Y/N could feel the power flooding her as the comet drew closer, pure and raw power. Though this accompanied by her skill would likely help her in the upcoming battle, dozens of Firebenders with half her skill and the power of the comet was something she was definitely worried about. Overpowering them all was unlikely, and in the best case scenario, Y/N could slow them down. But she wasn’t a fool. In war, there were always casualties, and she was prepared to become one of many. 

Then there were the thoughts in the back of her mind. Though nobody had discussed it, the throne could potentially go to her after all this, and that wasn’t really something Y/n was looking forward to debating. Perhaps it was selfish, but Y/N didn’t really care. Was it wrong of her to dream of escaping the shackles that bound her to the Fire Nation since birth, to leave behind the politics and the lies and the pain of it all?

Maybe. 

Sokka knew Y/N had a lot going on in her mind right now. And he knew she was scared of what was to come, and no matter how much it hurt him, he respected her wishes to wait until this battle was over to discuss whatever it was between them. He knew where he stood. But now that Suki had left them, he found himself beginning to regret it. On the top of the Air Balloon, Toph was practically blind, and Sokka could do little in terms of long distance, aside from his boomerang. Which left Y/N to do her best to defend them from the Firebenders that had begun to swarm them. 

“Go!” She cried out, knocking one of the Firebenders off the balloon. “Take out the rest of the fleet.” Y/N dodged the oncoming flames, intercepting them with her own to prevent the others from getting burned.

But Sokka wasn’t going to let anyone die today. “You still owe me a conversation,” came his response, looking down at the bridges on the Air Balloon. “Jump!” Sokka cried out as another ball of fire rushed towards them, he took Toph by the hand and hoped that Y/N followed. 

Thankfully, she did, he took notice of her as he fell towards the bridges extending from the giant hot air balloon. They were all screaming as they fell, and Y/N grunted in pain as she hit Sokka, tumbling over him and off the edge, yelping as her hands grasped the bridge, with little leverage. Toph similarly went over the side, her screams filling Sokka ears as Y/N released one of her hands from the bridge and caught Toph’s wrist. 

Panic flooded Sokka as he scrambled to the edge of the bridge, Y/N’s hand slipping, “Sokka! Hurry up-” Another scream rips out of her as she loses her grip on the edge.

Nearly falling as he grabbed her hand, his chest heaved. “It’s gonna be okay.” He promised, looking into Y/N’s panicked eyes. “It’s gonna be fine Toph!” He cried out to her.

“Yeah, right!” She called out into the wind, the fear evident in her voice despite the sarcastic nature of the comment. “Y/N I don’t wanna die.” 

Y/N almost can’t hear her, too focused on maintaining her grip on both Sokka and Toph’s hands. She exhales slowly, eyes falling on the soldiers that are beginning to make their way down to them as she replied, “you’re gonna be fine, I promise. I’m gonna get you to Sokka, okay?” 

Sokka was internally panicking, he wouldn’t be able to fight back against the incoming soldiers if both his hands were occupied, but his grip was faltering and he couldn’t pull them both up. Grimacing as he looked down at the two, he nodded in agreement to Y/N signaling that he was ready. It made sense in his mind, she would be able to use her free hand to Firebend, which was far more useful than anything he could provide at the moment. 

Inhaling deeply, Y/N looks to Toph, “Toph, I need you to climb up my body, and grab Sokka’s free hand, okay?”

Toph’s death grip on her hand seems to grow stronger, tears brimming her eyes, “I- I don’t think I can.” 

Y/N shakes her head at these words, “yes, yes you can. Bring your legs up to grab my lower body, and then make your way up, okay? Like a tree.”

Toph shook her head rapidly, “I’ve never climbed a tree!”

Sokka couldn’t help but grow impatient as he exclaimed, “there are soldiers coming, Toph please!” His hand was growing sweaty as he used his free hand to throw his sword at one of the oncoming soldiers, effectively knocking him down. 

Y/N felt her arm swing slightly, and watched as Toph blindly extended her legs, finally managing to wrap them around her legs. She released Y/N’s hand and wrapped both arms around her lower body, slowly inching upwards until her legs were around Y/N’s waist and her arms were on her shoulders. “Good job, now reach up, as far as you can, and Sokka’s gonna grab your hand.” Y/n instructed using her free hand to pat the hand that Toph had wrapped around her.

Y/N could feel the young girl’s tears fall onto her shirt as she extended her hand upwards, Sokka’s freehand moving as far down as possible. The strain on Y/N’s body slowly becoming too much as tears leaked out of her eyes.

Maybe it would be better to just... let go.

She quickly shook off those thoughts, Toph, Toph, Toph, she couldn’t do anything brash until Toph was safe. Y/N watched as Sokka’s hand narrowly missed Toph’s. “Sokka, please.” Y/N whispered, looking to him with pleading eyes.

Maybe it was the desperation he heard in her voice that moment, or maybe it was pure luck, put his fingers grazed Toph’s and he latched on, extending his arm as far as possible and gripping her hand. “Now let go of me, and Sokka’s gonna pull you up, okay?” Y/N explained, looking to Sokka, his eyes meeting hers. Y/N quickly realized he couldn’t lift either of them up. Just like her, this was straining his muscles, and Sokka was struggling to keep both of them up. 

“Sokka.” She said, demanding his attention, his eyes met hers, filled with fear as Toph relieved Y/N’s body of her weight and evened out the distribution on Sokka’s body. “You can’t fight back with both your hands taken.” More tears were streaming down her face as she spoke, “a-and... you can’t pull us both up.” Sokka was crying too now, shaking his head rapidly as Y/N simply pointed out the facts.

Toph’s grip on his hand tightened, “we’re all going to die.” There was resignation in her voice, and it hurt Y/N to hear it.

“We’ll figure it out. We are all going to be okay.” He stated firmly, a shaky breath leaving him as he made an attempt to pull them both upwards, a failed attempt.

Squeezing her eyes shut momentarily, Y/N allowed herself to imagine it, a life with Sokka and the rest of her friends. A life where they were all happy. Where everyone made it out of this war alive, and they helped bring balance to the world.

To give them that world, they had to end this war. And what was war without death?

Opening her eyes, she looked to Sokka, and he was panicked, noticing that far more soldiers had surrounded them and were preparing to mercilessly throw them off the balloon. “Sokka.” She repeated, and he looked to her with a tear streaked face. 

“I love you.” 

Everything seemed to slow as she spoke this words, and Y/N didn’t see the horror on his face for long as the grip of his hand faltered when she released it, he was screaming, crying, begging for her to stop. Toph clearly didn’t understand what was going on as she began to call out Y/N’s name in a panic. 

And then she was falling. 

It appeared there would be no after.

It felt peaceful, she decided. Falling. The stress on her body had dissipated and she caught one final glimpse of Sokka’s mortified face before going through the clouds. The comet was visible from where she was, the horizon, it was a beautiful way to die. But staring at the comet she realized she wanted to know what would come after, she realized that Toph was practically helpless and all Sokka had was a boomerang against dozens of Firebenders.

They would die. So, what was the point of her sacrifice? What was the point of her dying?

No, she wouldn’t be dying today.

Inhaling deeply, Y/N felt the power course through her veins, and she reminded herself that she was Y/N L/N, a force to be reckoned with. Nobody would forget that as fire tore through the soles of her shoes, and extended from her hands, propelling her upwards. 

She was the daughter of the famed Dragon of the West. And she would take on his mantle, she decided, as she flew upwards and through the clouds. 

She could see Sokka had managed to bring Toph upwards and onto the platform alongside him, and they were surrounded by Firebenders. It was clear that they’d seen her when their mouthes gaped open, and a few of the soldiers began to retreat, much to the chagrin of their commanding officer. Y/N found herself ceasing her Firebending and falling towards the platform, she landed in a roll and rose on one knee before opening her mouth and allowing fire to pour outwards.

The Firebenders fell off the bridges beside them one by one, and those who didn’t retreated back inside along with the others at the sight of the Air Balloon that Suki had evidently comandeered.

Closing her mouth, Y/N’s chest heaved, and she felt Toph tackle her from behind, “you’re alive!” She exclaimed, punching Y/N’s arm roughly, “idiot.” She dug her head into Y/N’s shirt.

“Yeah, I am an idiot.” Y/N replied breathlessly, holding the girl tightly.

When Toph finally released her, she gave her a smug look, “I’ll give you and him a minute.” Though this was partially an excuse to head back inside and into the safety of the balloon, maybe even attack some of the remaining Firebenders, it was also because Toph could read the room.

And there stood Sokka, mouth gaping open, tears streaming down his smiling face as he looked at her, before lunging towards her similar to how Toph had. Except his hands came to her cheeks as he brought their lips together, effectively knocking the two onto the ground of the platform, be pulled apart from her with a smile on his face, “I love you too.”

Yeah, after was looking pretty good right about now. 

A/N: i hope you guys liked this SUPER LONG THING WOW, that was an accident. i was super close to like breaking everyones hearts and killing Y/N but then i felt bad so be grateful i was nice ksaljdlahfkj

anyways take care of yourselves!

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A Marine and A Seal: Part 1

Paring: Steve McGarrett X Reader (Eventually)

Characters: Major Reader, Capt. Rolland (OC), Secretary of Defense, Capt. Green (OC), Capt. Collins (OC), Capt. Sparks (OC)

Word Count: 2530

Warnings: Angst, Language, Mentions of blood, Violence

A/n: this is part 1 of ?? I haven’t finished writing it just yet. So I don’t have an exact number yet. 

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The military is your entire life. You are what most civilians classified as a military brat. Ever since you were a little kid you moved around so much. You have been to a lot of different places, tried different things. Both of your parents were Marines. As soon as you turned 17, it was a no-brainer for you that you would go in as well.

Your father was excited when you told them that you were going to enlist. He had been preparing you for almost your entire life. You had learned all about gun safety and how to shoot when you were about six years old. He was also training you in hand-to-hand combat, by the time you were fifteen you could almost kick his ass.

Your mother on the other hand, was completely against you going into the military. She wanted you to have a life outside of all of this. She also didn’t want to have to bury her only child if something went wrong. She even tried to talk you out of it many times. In all honesty that only made you want to do it even more, you wanted to prove to her that you could do it and that you would be fine. Mostly you wanted to prove it to yourself.

When you went in, you had something to prove. You did every extra training that you could. No matter what you were being told, you still busted your ass to get through all of it. You spent the first four years of your military career doing these trainings. Over the years you moved up in the ranks.

Now you were in Afghanistan, you are leading a rescue mission to save an abducted Marine. He had gotten separated from his unit in a hostile area, which lead to his abduction. You were brought into a briefing, they showed you a video message that was sent through to your base. Captain Rolland was tied to a chair and was savagely beaten. You absolutely hated this part of your job, but this is something you would do over and over again. Just so that who ever you were rescuing would get back home safe.

You were the one they had called in to be the Team Leader. This mission was one of those that you weren’t “officially” on. So, you had to get in and out as quickly and quietly as possible. You had three men with you, you were able to pick your team but there was a last-minute change. One of the men you had chosen was unavailable. You were given a man you didn’t know but he wasn’t shy about not wanting you to be the leader. You didn’t give a fuck what he wanted. You had been on many missions to Afghanistan and other hostile areas around the world. He on the other hand was a risk, he has been in a non-deployable unit for the last four years, and you didn’t understand why he was even going on this mission.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me! You’re having HER lead this unit!” He looked over to you. “I bet you couldn’t lead a starving dog to its food bowl.”

“Excuse Me?! Who the fuck do you think your talking too?” You had gotten up in his face, well as close as you could. He is approximately 6’3”, and you are only 5’8”.

“A little girl who decided to play dress up in her daddy’s uniform.” He looked you up and down with a cocked eyebrow.

Your next move may have been a little overboard, but you weren’t going to take anybody’s shit, especially when another marines life was on the line. You grabbed him by the collar and slammed him into the wall behind the both of you. You kicked his legs out from under him, you were the only thing holding him from dropping on his ass.

“Y/LN!! LET HIM GO NOW!”

“Listen to me, you naïve little boy, you have been seriously misled.” You had the most deadpan look on your face, but your eyes were filled with rage. “I have been doing this a lot longer than you think. I grew up in this shit. I have done and seen things that you could only imagine in your nightmares. Don’t you ever get between me and saving one of our own! Do you understand?” You dropped him before he could say anything. Walking to the door before turning back to him. “Get your facts straight before you even try coming after me. Actually, just don’t fuck with me.” Then you left to get ready for you mission

“What is she talking about?” Green got up and looked at the Secretary of Defense.

“This is Major Y/LN. Show her some respect. She is one of the few highly trained marines we have had. She has more credentials, training and experience than most of the men in this battalion. She’s the one we call when we need things done. I suggest you don’t piss her off again. So, get over yourself, get the fuck out of my office and go get ready for your mission.” Your superior wasn’t going to tolerate an insubordinate marine.

You had to drop from a helicopter, far out enough from Khost that you wouldn’t be seen. You had to make it to Khost on your own. If you were captured you were on your own, the U.S. Government would deny you being out there so you have to be really careful on where you go and what you do.

You were currently outside of a warehouse. You had split your unit in two. You kept Green with you, just to keep an eye on him. Your other two men, Spark and Collins, were close friends of your so you knew you could trust them. You had signaled for them to take west side of the building. You and Green took the east, you looked in one of the windows, you didn’t see anyone in the hallway.

“There’s nobody on the east side, Collins how’s it looking over there?” You relayed to the team, getting all clear from him.

“We’re going to breach, in 3… 2… 1…”

You and your team breached. You worked your way through. There was some noise coming from around one of the corners. You held your fist up signaling to Green to stop, he did and tapped on your shoulder to let you know that he was right behind you. You looked around the corner to see two men with their backs turned to you. One of them went into a room, leaving the one alone.  You turned to Green, signaling that you were going to go in, and he was to stay here.

You flipped your M27 behind your back, pulling your knife from its sheath. You slowly moved around the corner, once you had gotten close enough you slipped the knife back into its sheath. You brought your arm around the mans neck putting him into a choak hold, making him unable to scream, while putting the other hand on his gun so he couldn’t get a shot off.

Once he was out, you slowly lowered him to the ground so that he didn’t make a loud noise. You slowly walked to the end of the hall, looking around the corner to see Collins and Spark coming up. You signaled to Green to come over. You hear noise coming from the room that the previous man had went into. You had Collins and Sparks hold around the corner, you pushed Green back to where when the door opens the two of you would be behind it.

Next thing the door opens, the man started walking towards where your men were hidden behind the corner. Before you could even move to grab the guy, Green moved around you to go for the guy. His footsteps are a lot heavier than yours, they caused him to turn around and raise his gun to fire. You pushed Green out of the way just in time, but that left you in the open. The man was only able to get one shot before you could shoot him in the head. Luckily for you he was a bad shot, the bullet grazed the side of your arm.

“Damn It!” You grabbed your arm, pulling your hand away covered in blood. You glared back at Green.

Collins and Spark came around the corner to see you injured, and Green getting up off the ground.

“I had him Y/LN.” Green yelled in a hushed tone.

“No, you didn’t. He would have shot you in the chest if I wouldn’t have pushed you out of the way. Now, let’s go find Rolland before you get someone killed.”

You looked back to the door, you moved over to it. Getting the guy’s attention, you showed that you were going to breach, and they needed to be right behind you. Once they were in place, you opened the door. You had your gun up, chubby-cheeking it. You slowly moved into the dark room, but there was as single light. It was shining down onto a man sitting in a chair in the center of the room.

You slowly come around to see that it was Rolland. Once again you flip your gun behind you, going up to him you check to see if he had a pulse. As soon as your hand touched his neck, his eyes shot open. You instantly covered his mouth with your other hand.

“Hey Rolland, how about we get you out of here?” He instantly nodded his head. You started cutting the ropes off of him while the others kept watch. You also did a quick once over on him, bandaging the bigger cuts to makes sure he didn’t bleed too much.

After you cleaned him up, you helped him up. He could walk but it was slowly. You had Spark help him as you led them out. You made it out of the building, only having to take out a few men. you almost made it to the extraction site when you got pinned down. There were quite a few men surrounding your team. You needed to make a choice.

“Collins.”

“Yeah?”

“I have a plan, but you’re not going to like it.” You looked over to him.

“Then we aren’t doing it. I’m not going to let you be the bate while we get away.” He knew you too well.

“Well, you don’t have a choice. Rolland isn’t going to last us trying to take them out one by one. We also can’t risk them calling for back-up.”

Spark and Green were listening to you as well. They were still watching their surroundings, as well as shooting anyone who came into their line of sight.

“Here’s what is going to happen. I’m going to go around this ridge to give you cover fire. You need go west about three clicks to the extraction site.” You pulled the Sat Phone off of one of your pockets and put it in his hand. “If I’m not there in under 20 get the Hell out of here.”

“Damn It Y/n. I don’t want to have to explain to your parents why you didn’t make it home. We are not doing it.”

“That’s an Order, this is not up for negotiation! Do I make myself clear?!”

“Yes Ma’am.” He was hesitant in saying it. You know he would at least make it to the site, you just hoped he listens to the rest of the order.

“Okay, I will give you a signal when its clear. Stay safe boys.”

You checked to make sure your rifle and your pistol were fully loaded. You moved around your men to a spot where you had a clear line to the ridge. Before you took off, you looked to them one last time. You saw Green staring at you with a worried look on his face.

“Don’t worry Green, I’ll make sure you get there unharmed.”

“How do you know that?”

“I never miss.” With that you took off running.

You were able to make it to the ridge quickly, while drawing all the attention to you. You ducked behind it for a few second, waiting for the bullets to stop. You closed your eyes, taking in a deep breath, just listening to where they were coming from. Once they stopped, you popped up and started shooting. Taking them out as quickly as you could. They were trying to shoot you, but you kept moving. That was one of the many things you father taught you. “If you’re the target, don’t make it easy for them. Always be moving, don’t even give them a chance to drop you.”

Unfortunately, it didn’t always work. One of the men was able to get a shot off before you could get to him. The lucky part was it hit your shoulder. After shooting the last man you signaled to Collins to move up and out. You waited to move until you knew they weren’t being followed before you stood up to follow them.

As soon as you were on your feet, you were knocked down. You flipped over to see a gun in your face. Quickly you grabbed the end of the barrel and pushed it out, so that if he shot it would go to the ground and not you. You brought both of your legs up and kicked him in the gut causing him to go falling backwards. You still had a hold of the gun, he ended up letting go as he fell. You tossed it to the side, both of you scrambled to your feet. He started throwing punches, you blocked almost all of them. He landed one in your stomach and one in the face. Your nose started bleeding, but it wasn’t broken. You were able to land all of your punches and kicks. You were able to knock him on his ass, before pulling your knife out and ending it. You quickly pulled your knife from him, flipping it into position in your hand before wiping it off and re-sheathing it.

Collins had called for the chopper; it was waiting for them when they arrived. It was getting too close to the 20-minute mark for Collins. He was ready to run back in to find you. Just as he was about to, you came over the hill. He ran over to you, helping to back to the chopper. Once the two of you were in it took off.

“Wow, you look like shit.” Sparks was trying to stop the bleeding coming from your nose.

“Well, I got shot and punched in the face.” You squinted at him carefully. “So, what’s your excuse?”

You all laughed. The rest of the flight out of there was silent. That was too close of a call for your liking. You started thinking about life and what you wanted to do. You loved being a Marine, but you can’t help thinking that it was maybe time for a change.

Ohana (Everything) Tags:

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[biggest-stupidhead]

Hello! First of all I have to say that your writing is the best I have read so far and you have a way with words that has me going crazy at 3 am 🤣🤣 I wanted to suggest a short story where Levi and the reader have feelings for each other and are on a mission together. Then it starts to rain and it gets really cold at night so they’re forced to seek shelter and have to spend the night together in an abandoned old house until the rain stops, and they basically get to know each other better and eventually start flirting ya know ya know? 😗Thank you so much and please feel free to add any more ideas you may have 😁

ahhh the classic, stuck with a stranger trope. I dig it :) 

Summary: You spend a rainy night with your bitter captain

Word Count: 1.8K

__

The rain felt like needles as you rode into the wind, your cloak felt heavy and waterlogged as you struggled to see through the shower. You had lost your squad, leaving you alone in the middle of titan country. Your gear felt light, meaning that your blades were nearly gone and gas as well. In other words, you were royally fucked. 

Your horse was huffing, sides rising and falling deeply as she tried to hold the pace you had set. Her head bobbed and you threaded your fingers through her mane and stood on the saddle to ease the weight on her back, and allow her to resume her natural gait. 

Just as you emerged from the thin thicket of trees you had been riding in, you spotted a small cabin, and a black horse tied up out front. You recognized Captain Levi’s stallion and felt relief flood through you. You steered your mare towards the squat building and swung off once she came to a halt. Tying her up next to Levi’s stallion before jogging up the stairs. You lifted your hand and pounded on the door, a flash of lightning illuminated your form when Levi pulled the door open. His hair was dripping wet as was his clothes. 

“Cadet (L/n), surprised you made it this far.” He scoffed before turning and stalking back into the cabin. 

“Captain....the formation is broken.” You stated the obvious, unsure of how to respond to his jab. 

“No shit, this damn rain fucks with the signals. Seen it before.” You almost weren’t sure if he even said the last part since he muttered it so quietly. 

“So what do we do?” You asked, clutching your cloak anxiously. 

“We wait it out idiot.” Levi grunted as he began rummaging around the small cabin’s kitchen drawers. 

“What...about the formation?” 

“The formation doesn’t exist anymore, what matters now is getting back to the wall.” 

You remained silent, stunned by the gravity of the situation you’d found yourself in. 

“Shitty eyebrows needs to stop putting the fucking formation on a pedestal, you brats need to learn how to act at your own discretion.” Levi continued as he pawed through a drawer, he pulled his hand out holding two stones. Flint, to be precise, he had already taken some of the firewood that had been sitting in the cabin and chucked it into the fireplace. You wondered how long it had sat there in the lonely cabin, who had gathered it? A child maybe? When you were younger, you had lived on a farm with your family, raising horses for the military. One of your many jobs had been to get firewood. You wondered what had happened to the people who lived here before, wondered if they could ever return. 

“Oi, take off those boots. Just because nobody’s lived here in three years doesn’t mean you get to track mud inside.” He scolded and you quickly stripped yourself of your mud caked boots. 

“Yes sir.” You grumbled as you numbly wandered into the kitchen, pausing when you found a small corn husk doll, very similar to the ones you once made. You picked it up, cradling its head as you held it up in the dim light. The sound of stones clicking and then the crackle of a small fire brought you back. You turned to see Levi hanging his cloak and jacket by the flames. 

“Take off your cloak and jacket.” He ordered and you placed the doll down to fulfill his command. You shivered in just your shirt, which was soaked, the olive colored fabric nearly see through due to the wetness. Levi averted his eyes as he snatched your jacket and cloak from you. You dropped down to sit on the floor near the fire, staring into the flames as you allowed your mind to wander. Levi sat down as well, crossing his legs and closing his eyes as he tried to even out his breathing. The only sound was the crackling fire and the patter of rain on the old roof. You had nearly forgotten how it sounded, having lived in the castle for years now, the cozy cabin brought you back to your childhood. And before you could think better of it, you asked: 

“Where are you from captain?” 

“None of your concern.” He grunted, eyes still closed and face lacking any signs of emotion. 

“Well, where I’m from, when it rained like this...we’d go outside and-” 

“I didn’t fucking ask. Now shut up and go to sleep or something.” 

“There’s no need to be so bitter Captain.” You mumbled, crossing your arms over your chest and angling your shoulders away from him, the sting of his words. You sighed heavily and fell flat on your back, staring up at the rafters, a drop of water seeped through and landed right on your nose and you let out a huff of disgust. 

“....Look” Levi’s voice was heavy and less annoyed than previously. 

“If talking...makes you feel better about all of this....then I guess I don’t mind listening.” He looked at you out of the corner of his eye, bangs obscuring the top half of his face as he studied you, splayed out on the floor. 

“....Thanks.” 

“As I was saying, when I was younger, I used to be scared of thunder storms. But my grandma, she would make this cake. She called it thunder cake.” You closed your eyes and a dreamy smile curled onto your lips. Levi felt a pang of jealousy, being nearly 28, one would think that he could get over his childhood. But he just couldn’t seem to, he wished he grew up in the sunshine, known his family, gotten to be scared of thunder instead of men in the underground. 

“-it wasn’t really anything special, just a lemon cake. But making it during the storm...she said it was magic, and you know.....I believed her.” Your voice cracked and Levi frowned, he remembered that naivety, how his mother would tell him about fairies or goblins. He had believed those stories for a time as well. But when she had died, he no longer saw beauty in the world. How could he? 

“She was so smart Captain. She knew everything, how to treat a tooth ache, how to make the best bread, break a horse. I wish I could be half as wise as her.” You continued, Levi turned to look at you, your usually bright eyes seemed distant and foggy, mouth screwed into a frown, your bottom lip trembling. 

“When she died, I felt so alone. I couldn’t compare, how could I? She was so strong and, I was just a shitty kid.” You scoffed bitterly, Levi understood your pain deeply, loosing people was something he was all too familiar with. He blindly reached out and let his hand awkwardly fall over your own. You froze, head turning to look at him. 

“How about you? What did your...parent do to help you through the scary parts?” You asked, eyes wide and hopeful. Levi’s jaw locked as he tried to wrack his brain for something to say, you had just been so vulnerable with him. How could he not repay the favor? Especially if the two of you would die in this shitty cabin. 

“She would....give me a bath, or we’d clean the house.” He said with a curt nod, remembering his mother pouring soapy water over him after he had scrapped his knee, or cried so hard that his eyes were nearly swollen shut. Yes, that was the truth, they would take a bath and then she’d tell him those shitty stories. 

“That sounds nice.” You said wistfully as you turned your hand to lace your fingers with his. You sensed his tension and decided to carry on telling your own story. 

“I hated cleaning, my grandma used it as punishment for me. Like when I was 10 I threw eggs at the neighbor boy after he lifted my skirt up.” You chuckled lowly at the memory. 

“Sounds like he deserved it.” Levi said with the smallest of smiles. You beamed up at him and nodded. 

“Yeah, he sure did. My grandma made me clean the coop for two weeks after that, and the stables.” You giggled, squeezing his hand as you laughed. He felt another wave of jealousy, wishing he had memories like yours. 

“And you? Did you ever get in trouble?” You asked, rolling onto your side, pulling your hand free from his, he immediately missed the contact, not that he would admit it though. 

“That’s all I did when I was younger.” Levi scoffed, looking down at you with a gleam of amusement in his gaze. 

“What kind of trouble?” You pressed, resting your chin on your palm as you stared up at him. 

“I bet it was with girls, you seem to be popular with the cadets.” You teased and Levi’s nose wrinkled in disgust. 

“No, more like I was stealing and selling government property illegally.” He scoffed, reaching his hand down to ruffle your damp hair, you let out a bark of laughter as he grabbed the roots of your hair and shook your head playfully. 

“Yeah right, you’re the strictest of all the squad leaders, as if I would believe-” 

“I grew up in the underground, didn’t matter down there, just did what I had to do to put food on the table.” He shrugged, trying to keep the atmosphere light, yet stay honest with you. 

“No way....that’s impressive captain-”

“Levi, call me Levi.” He said, withdrawing his hand and leaning back against the couch that was behind the two of you. 

“Okay then...Levi, I call bullshit.” You said, propping yourself up on your elbow and beaming up at him. Levi glared down at you, not sure if he liked the defiance or loathed it. Thunder rumbled and lightning flashed, but your eyes never strayed from his and he let out a scoff. 

“It’s true, I was born a bastard and escaped through the military.” You raised your brows at this, you hadn’t expected him to be honest. 

“I...admire you for that, takes a strong person to overcome things like that.” You said a tad sheepishly as you averted your gaze, feeling like you had overstepped some boundaries. 

“We all face our own challenges..” Levi muttered, eyes still locked on you. 

“That is true.” You agreed, with a small smile thrown his way. The rain still pounded against the windows and your gaze strayed to them, watching the water stream off of the roof. 

“This will all be a bad memory in the morning.” Levi said, following your gaze, he recalled how you said you’d been afraid of thunder when you were younger. He wondered if you still harbored that fear. 

“I don’t think it will, I hope I can look back on it fondly.” You said, turning and smiling softly up at him, and Levi’s stomach began doing flips, his cheeks flushing at the sentiment behind your words. 

“Yeah....whatever, just go to sleep brat.” He grunted, reaching down and ruffling your hair once more, you giggled and laid down, soothed to sleep by the feeling of his hand in your hair and the sound of rain on window panes.