#i definitely cried so bad at the end
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guuuh a way out is such a great game, incredibly niche title that everyone should actually check out - like seriously. why didn't I pick up on this game when everyone was still posting about it... 5 years ago....
#i really like games where i can have a friend with me and this one executed the multiplayer function and panelling amazingly#so many sequences where player one and two take turns in having such a blast especially in quick time events#the whole hospital sequence was so exciting to watch its insane#not to mention the amazing power dynamic between vincent and leo because they're such contrasts working together#though im more biased to leo because im pretty sure id act like him#but vincent's morals are definitely me#ahdhshrhshehs anyways like SERIOUSLY this game can so SO comedic if you had the time for it and it also pacts the most compelling story#i definitely cried so bad at the end#no shade to vincent but i think leo had the better ending to everything that happened#jil talks#I love niche games!!!! I love it!!!!!!!!!#this game became so much funner to me because of the two YouTubers that played togethrr to play as leo and vincent
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It’s just. How did they mess up ROTT that badly??
Like. The plot of the movie was basically already covered in Unbecoming. We’ve already seen it play out
How is an almost two hour movie worse than a 23-minute long episode??
#Owl Hoots#I have a lot more thoughts on it#there were so many bad thing#*things#like. that was not good characterization#Jim. Jim why are you saying you were always curious about your dad#no!!! no!!!!! you yourself said you don’t care about him!!!!#ROTT#Rise of the Titans#and like. the ending???#did they just entirely forget Unbecoming??#Merlin’s Amulet would have chosen Jim#Jim going back in time wouldn’t have made Toby the Trollhunter#that… that makes no sense#Merlin said it himself#he didn’t make a mistake choosing Jim#he wouldn’t have chosen Toby#I have to say tho there were a good handful of things I did love or like#The animation and special effects#Douxie and Nari switching bodies? Clever#the use of trains and the turntable thing#I absolutely adore trains#Nari and Skrael fighting. That was cool#I think the design of the MagicTech armor was AWESOME#only complaint is I wish Excalibur had changed to match the armor#but that’s whatever#before I watched it I heard that Toby’s death didn’t make people cry because there were too many unnecessary deaths#so it made it not hurt#well I definitely cried#Jim’s reaction to Toby’s death hurt so much
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i know i’ve said that being able to do the stereotypical insane ao3 authors notes is fun and amusing to me but can the universe NOT take that as a challenge to add more shit to my list of things to add next time i post ???? like. fucking. Calm Down Please.
#situations keep happening and i am TIRED#had to restrain a kid at work today which was AWFUL but he was trying to run into the road so i literally had to#almost cried bc of it but got the situation under control#but then when on my way to meet w coworkers to carpool to a meeting#my tire popped#super fun times super awesome super great#i mean my mom helped and we got it all fixed and handled#but basically from noon to like 6pm my mom and i were dealing w it bc everything had to be COMPLICATED#so i only just got home like 45 mins ago ish and i am SO tired holy fuck#but im eating left over orange chicken and then gonna shower and then just gonna be lazy and read and maybe write#if i have the brain power i will work on hb chp17#but i also have a 4 hour training for work tomorrow so yeehaw#its 12:30-4:30 which isnt that bad but still#im also going to my dads afterwards to stay the night and visit him and my siblings#which is a good thing dont get me wrong i love visiting them#it just means i wont have a lot of freetime this weekend to work on writing and cleaning and stuff#not the end of the world and definitely worth it to see my dad and my baby siblings#but i wish it was a 3 day weekend so i could also have a day to just stay home and do things that i havent had the time to do yk#oh well. tis life. adulthood. having to handle situations and finding the best out of shitty circumstances. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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Hi!!!!
Do you have any hcs for how Alicole would try and solve and argument with the kids? Like, their dynamic (especially Aegon with Alicole cause he’s the oldest) is just so interesting and I’ve always wondered how an argument/disagreement would play out with them
ooh, tasty concept.
with arguments amongst the children, they try and get them to take a step back. they'll each take a kid (or two if it involves all of them) and give them a hug or something of the like, easing the tensions, before helping them come to some sort of compromise or agreement.
when it comes to non petty arguments that every child has, the source of issues amongst the kids is the following;
with Aegon they have to settle his need to compensate for feeling as though he is lacking. he tends to pick on his siblings when he's feeling down on himself. so it's a lot of affirming words and hugs while also chiding his cruel behavior. he's definitely hard on himself about being cruel as well, he doesn't like being mean it just sorta comes out of him when he's not in good spirits about himself. he shoves his siblings away over little things when he's upset which only makes him feel worse in the long run. the whole situation makes it hard to parent, as it's not right how he treats his siblings at times, but it's also awful how he feels and how it presents itself. there's typically long talks after the fact. Aegon's usually in his dad's arms, more often than not, while he mom comforts him.
with Aemond it's cooling his temper and frustration, deep breaths and grounding. they remind him that he can't let every jab get a rise out of him, that he always had them to turn to when he needs help, that he's not alone to handle his anger. they try and learn more and more each time, what triggers his anger, what helps him calm down, what to avoid, etc. sometimes he needs to just be held other times he needs a moment alone to breathe. they also try and help him learn how to self regulate and also make his siblings aware that he's getting upset prior to him lashing out (they also talk to them about it).
with Helaena, arguments tend to be because she thinks so differently from her brothers. not only is she a girl in a house of boys, but also because she's autistic (I was the autistic 'sister' in a house of boys for most of my life, it definitely brewed some unique arguments, and I'm gonna project god damn it), their ways of thinking and doing are so different sometimes that she just loses it. so with her, they let her talk, they let her ramble and decompress until she can ground herself, then they have to try and explain the boys point of views, how they see may not be the right way, nor is hers, neither are, but they have to learn to agree. then it's hugs and kisses and talking it out, before they go back to hashing it out with the boys.
Daeron's the most agreeable with the siblings, very adhd coded in my mind (so I'm going to project my brother onto him cause they're very copy pasted in my mind) so when he gets into an argument it's because he's going too fast, too passionate, and/or too much. so again, like most of their children, it's grounding first talking later. like Helaena, they have to explain that the way he is isn't bad or wrong, but that's sometimes we need to slow down, take a breath, cool off, and than continue.
with arguments they take their kids separately, normally separated into different rooms and they visit them together. depending on the exact situation they may just offer hugs and softness, or they'll play a slight game of good cop/bad cop, though they're careful with it. the goal is to solve the problem, not slap a bandaid on it. they tend to each kids needs before handling the actual issue at hand and then being them together to find a solution.
they can both be soft and stern in their own ways. Cole is typically softer on them, as he gets to their levels, takes them close while talking, but he has a stern voice and makes it clear he's willing to put a foot down if need be. while Alicent tends to be a bit more formal and stereotypically authoritative, sitting at the table with them, even if she holds their hands in hers and pulls their chairs close so she can stroke their cheeks.
normally the kids can make right up, or at least come to peaceful terms, but if it doesn't, cause kids can hold grudges like no one's business, Alicent and Cole are forced to remain wholly neutral which is much harder than one would think. most of their fights that lead to grudges are very childish so it's really just waiting for them to crack and realize it was a stupid argument. this is made easier when they don't get involved, so they just laugh amongst themselves where the kids can't see them, and try and keep face in front of them (they can smell weakness and betrayal. send help. a 4 kids household isn't easy). they definitely have moments where they wave the white flag cause one of the kids accused them of siding. the "get along" shirt is also an active and well worn member of the family (Aegon and Aemond share it often)
this video is very much Aegon and Daeron. they feud often. they're either acting like Aegon is a second dad to him, or they are actually going to war and have been sworn enemies for generations, fighting a battle to honor their forefathers (Alicent and Criston are so tired). speaking of Aegon being a second dad, he definitely oversees a lot of arguments between Daeron and his friends... does he understand little kid drama? no. is it entertaining as all hell? you fucking bet, he wants to hear all about what little James did at daycare.
when the kids are arguing with them, which with the way they run the house is pretty rare, but not impossible, they first take a step back for themselves. they will never show anger or cruelty towards their kids, so they make sure they're ok before they even think about talking to their kids.
talking will always be their goal, they never want to use threats or punishments to get what they want from their kids, and they have different ways about it. because their kids know how their household works, that things work on their time, and that just being open and honest, they really just need a day or two to themselves, if the reason for arguing isn't time sensitive, and then they can just take it out.
Aegon is sulky, he just closes himself in his room or flees to a friend's house (which they let happen so long as he leaves a note, leaves his location on his phone, and checks in every few hours) if its really bad. he'll drag himself back to the kitchen table in 48 hours tops, wanting nothing more than for his mom and dad to love him again (they never stopped).
Aemond is just frustrated past reason, so he'll go out and fence with his dummy or just something physical, then he's more willing to listen to reason.
Helaena normally had a boundary or nerve pushed, which was normally accidental, either cause she was already frustrated with something or something changed and it just put both parties in bad positions. space is all she needs.
Daeron is a bit of all the above. he's sensitive, though hard to cross, its often more about other things, something his parent did just broke the camels back, so a long run brings everything back to reason.
Alicent and Criston care so much about their kids, every argument they have with their kids, typically one-sided as they refuse to truly yell, breaks their heart whether or not they did anything or not. they never plan to punish their kids for arguing, they were kids once and they know that its good that they feel safe enough to stand up and fight for what they believe to be true, that they feel safe to shout and disagree with them. they would rather that over anything else, cause they know their kids trust them.
while they aren't permissive with their kids, their are rules and hard limits, they don't count arguing as something to be punished, and their kids don't tend to strand into punishable territories. so resolving a fight is a long talk at the kitchen table, no man's land so to speak, where all parties air their grievances. the problem is discussed, apologies are said on all sides, and sometimes it doesn't always end in a hug, but it does end in feelings being soothed and bridges mended. no one walks away with hard feelings.
they're not perfect, but they make it work, and because they've put so much time and effort into making their home safe and sane, the whole family in therapy, making active efforts to be nothing like their first "home" true arguments are far and few between, and when they happen they're equipped to handle it. Alicent and Cole are such good parents, their kids love and trust them, theirs so much space to talk and negotiate and handle issues early on that there typically isn't any reason to fight. I think that's what makes them such a good family, cause its so hard for me to picture them actually fighting outside of petty things.
#I genuinely cannot picture this family fighting#like petty things between the kids or teenage angst hurled at Alicent and Criston that they laugh about a few hours later most definitely#they wouldn't be a family otherwise#but I think that real arguments are rare and I love that for them#definitely strived to find the balance between gentle and authoritative parenting so their kids are well structured#handle all of their problems when they were little and now most issues are easy#cyclebreakers fr fr#they're also all mommy/daddy's girls and boys#all their fights are just big feelings that need to be rode out#Aegon yelling at Criston cause he's young and dumb and hurting cause he got his heart broken at school or cause he had to think about#dead dumb dad and his teenage heart is angry and he needs to put it somewhere? I think yes. I also think he cried in his arms a few hours#later and begged for his dad to love him again. cause they're hopeless#Helaena losing her mind at her parents cause she's just so stressed and everything'd out by the world and they just happened to breathe the#wrong way at dinner? again. I think yes. and she felt so bad afterward and goes on a whole vent about school and people and does some DPT#after letting them both hug her really tight so she could calm down#Aemond getting frustrated cause they're “babying” him over the loss of his eye and just ending up a sobbing screaming mess cause he's just#so mad at the world and he doesn't know what to do with himself#Daeron's head getting too loud so he gets super upset and disregulated and starts yelling in his room. not even at them directly until they#come in. he just loses his shit for a minute until he's tuckered out and then he's a mess in his parents arms#teenage angst is a bitch and the source of everyone's problems#alicole#alicent hightower#criston cole#aegon ii targaryen#aegon targaryen#aemond targaryen#helaena targaryen#daeron targaryen#pro team green#hotd
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#personal#i have doctors appt today with a new doctor its literally not even a real appointment i just need some stupid forms signed#but guys im so stressed im so scared ive already cried once about it today i just. i fucking hate doctors so so much#theyre all so bad. im not in the mood to be dismissed again today and its 15 goddamn degrees so everything feels bigger and worse than it is#if they dont sign the form i dont get paid any more and if i dont get paid i cant continue to try and sort out my medical#which means i continue to not get paid and im just. so scared. so so fucking scared i dont even care if we find the start if the path#to vetter my health i dont care about gettinf better right now i just need this fucking form signed but#ive already been dismissised for it once and i have new doctor jitters. what do you mean i have to tell someone new that#i have ptsd and anxiety and depression and fibro and alleged bpd but its probably autism actually and hope#hope and prey they losten to me because its other doctors that have told me this and im definitely computer illiterate i couldntve come up#with all this on my own i promise ive done zero research into my own symptoms i live with every day im a simpleton im an idiot#please believe me dr refer me to ypur colleagues for further testing but in the mwan time sign the one form i need please#im so scared. i dont know what to do. my tarot says to tryst myself and find my own authority about the situation#but like literally legally i cant i have to rely on the hope this new doctor gives her signature or i dont get fucking paid as stated#i hate this i feel so shaky and nervous and nauseous and awful 😮💨#and im supposed to do groceries today. im at the very end of my shopping like if i dont go get food today#then i dont eat tonight but its cold and rainy and im super stressed abt the appointment so idk if ill be able to go shopping after#i dont wanna die anymore but like rn i kinda do this is too much today feels like too much#help me im drowning
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i will defend for my life arataka is much, much more complex than he is perceived as
i know he is like idk. Stupidly bold and goofy but he is
He is the lost young-adulthood, he is guilty for just existing, he thinks he is a burden
He believes he is lost in his life, he believes he is miserable
I know he tries a lot to be helpful to others, and he is
But I can't help but realize Reigen thinks he is some kind of port, people stay with him and they get better in life, trust themselves more, and then leave
Like a port that ships has to stay for a while
Shigeo will be gone soon, Tome too
And eventually Seri too
I can't help but see how he lost his light, his hope for himself
I hope he can move on one day too. He deserves it
He deserves unconditional true love
#im definitely not crying while typing this wdym#i wish more people see him more than his stupid actions and#he tells a subtle story many adults go through yet it feels so overlooked#i get him#i get how he feels#i feel like him most of the time so i feel really bad man#now the series are ending i guess its hitting me like a truck again#i sat down and cried about this for a good half an hour lmao#loquacious cat rambles#mp100#mob psycho 100#reigen arataka#mp100 analysis#reigen is the definition of losing the life of hope
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Sometimes I’m like “I exaggerate my daddy issues cuz it’s funny” but then I remember every chapter of Wayne Family Adventures where there’s a father/son moment I start crying uncontrollably
#superman teaching conner how to shave broke me#and the Bruce with dick!Robin when they go against Ivy flashback where I just… I couldn’t stop crying lmao#also I cried during detective pikachu at the end when the dad looks at Tim so lovingly#and my brain went like ‘my dad never looked at me like that’#and I started crying lmao#but yeah no my daddy issues definitely aren’t that bad I swear#dc stuff#I guess??
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#Im gonna. im gonna. i gotta#anyway. easier watch. this time around. cause it was on my laptop and not on a Big Ufcking Screen.#i did get teary 20 mins in. and cried properly at the 1hr mark. but it's ok. the ending was definitely easier#serious posts inevitably tomorrow. for now:#cinematographer jamie d ramsay i owe you my life. im never listening to the pet shop boys again. and mr scott mr mescal you were best actor#/ best supporting actor in my heart.#neon has thoughts#movie tag#i feel like a tea towel and i want to watch the behind the scenes features so bad but i have to go to sleep
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happy new years !
#i’m gonna blow off some steam in the tags bc what just happened to me was definitely an interesting way to end 2023#a person i had a relationship with and deeply cherish (i knew them for 7 years) just insulted me and said that our whole relationship was#a lie and insulted my art saying it’s shit👍#cried over them for the past 4 month since they ghosted me#but i’m more shocked and angry than sad now#i’m just truly lucky to be surrounded w people that care about me and lift me up#also fuck off. the art comment pissed me off most. so what if it’s bad in your eyes#i have fun making it . that’s why i do it. i don’t care if anyone thinks it’s bad.#anyway hope you all have a good new years! ❤️
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with you, i'm first | miya osamu x reader
in which miya osamu is used to coming second to his brother. but with you, he's always first.
wc: 1113 | gn!reader | fluff
Miya Osamu is used to coming second.
It starts with Atsumu, like most things do. October is cold and gray and Atsumu comes first, a small body with a large presence that fills the warm hospital room. His cries are loud and he’s a little underweight, but with him comes the sun.
Atsumu is born under a partly cloudy sky but the nurses swear he was shrouded in sunlight.
Osamu comes twelve minutes later. His parents are crying and his Ma is close to passing out. If he thinks really hard he can almost feel her warmth, Atsumu’s sobs, and a mumble of prayers that October has safely brought Atsumu and then Osamu.
He asks Grandma one day what the weather was like when he was born. She says, with confidence, it was foggy.
Atsumu doesn’t get along with his classmates. He is too loud and too rash and lacks social cues, and Osamu is angry because Stupid ‘Tsumu cares too little: and he wants everyone to know Atsumu like he knows Atsumu.
They fight and they yell and they argue until Atsumu says,
‘Samu, I don’t care about ‘em. Why do ya care so much?
And Osamu throws him across the room. The argument ends there, he says sorry, and Osamu lies awake that night thinking about his brother. Atsumu is hotheaded. And an idiot. A loud snorer, too. But he turns on his side and curls into a ball because he knows it was sunny when Atsumu was born and all of a sudden he really wants to be his brother.
Atsumu dyes his hair first: it’s a shitty box dye from the pharmacy down the street, and it looks terrible. It’s a little yellow and a little neon, and Osamu laughs until his sides hurt when Atsumu shows him.
But Atsumu is proud, and he is confident, and he goes to school with a hundred watt smile and a group of girls trailing after him.
Osamu goes to the pharmacy that night and buys a box of gray, cloudy dye. Atsumu helps him bleach his hair under their bathroom sink with the faulty tap and tells him he looks like the moon.
His Ma says that Atsu is hot and Samu is cold after the two have a particularly bad fight. Atsumu is gleeful and smug as he gloats that he was born to be hotter and warmer and better, and Osamu punches him.
He remembers his Ma sitting on the porch, an arm around his shoulders as he pouts.
“‘S not fair,” Osamu had said, his chin in his palm. “Why’d ya name Tsumu that?”
His Ma had laughed, quietly, leaning her weight into his side. And she had held his cheeks between her palms and told him with a fire in her eyes that Osamu means To Rule.
He meets you for the first time in February.
You were standing in front of him, a little sheepish, with a box of chocolates in your extended palms. He remembers feeling something heavy in his chest. Because, yeah, Atsumu was definitely going to accept your confession.
You had said, IReallyLikeYou, and Here’sSomeChocolates, and Please Accept Them.
You were shorter than him, and your hair was done nicely, and you were blushing and nervous. And you were really fucking cute. But Osamu is used to coming second, so the only thing that comes out of his mouth is, Why? And then, Tsumu’s in tha next classroom ov’r.
He doesn’t remember what happened next, only Atsumu’s laugh and the slap echoing through the halls. You leave with his cheeks stinging and hot. And Atsumu had teased him the next day, behind his mountain of chocolates and confessions, because Osamu’s face was still red twelve hours later.
He sees you a lot the year after.
You’re in the same class as him and ‘Tsumu, and you smile every time you see him. You sit two rows in front of him and you’re not very good at tying your uniform. Every lunch, Osamu watches you pull out the same gray bento with a wrapped onigiri on the side. He tells you one day that he really likes onigiri. And then, Osamu watches as every lunch, you pull out the same gray bento with two wrapped onigiris on the side.
With you, it’s always Hi Osamu, first, and then, Hullo Atsumu. With you, it’s an onigiri dropped on his desk when the lunch bell rings. With you, Osamu thinks back to a conversation with his Ma on a porch.
Osamu means To Rule.
The menu is this: Tuna mayo on Mondays and Thursdays, Ume on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Friday is plain. You don’t ever bring onigiri for his brother.
He asks you, on a hot night in June, what your favorite type of weather is. You had your knees tucked to your chest, a sparkler in hand, and then told him cloudy. Cold. Foggy. Winter. Snow is nice, too. You say it all with no hesitation.
Osamu kisses you for the first time that night.
It’s New Years and you’re cooking Ozoni on the stove. The curtains are open, it’s snowing outside, and Osamu wakes to the smell of miso and the sound of carrots on a chopping board. He gets out of bed, padding to the kitchen with half-lidded eyes and a stifled yawn, and then he thinks his heart stops when he sees you.
Because what Miya Osamu is not used to is this: coming first and having something unequivocally his.
But you’re bent over the counter, fiddling with the oven as you read the instructions on the back of the packaged Yakimochi you bought the other day. And you’re wearing his shirt, it falls right below your thighs, your hair is still messy from using his chest as a pillow, and you look beautiful.
“Mornin’ ‘Samu, come help me with this.” You say, looking back at him with a smile, pointing to the fresh pot of rice on the counter. “You’re in charge of onigiri.”
He hugs you instead, his arms around your stomach with your back to him.
“But I like yer onigiri,” He says, his chin on your head. His eyes are watering and it must be from the steam of your boiling dashi.
“‘Samu,” You complain, giggling as he presses kisses into the crown of your head. “I made enough for ya in high school.”
It’s cold outside and snowing, and Osamu knows he’s going to make the onigiri.
He also knows that if his name means To Rule, he’s okay with coming second if it means you’re by his side.
#miya osamu#osamu#osamu x reader#miya osamu x reader#osamu fluff#haikyuu x reader#osamu x you#haikyuu fic#haikyu x reader#osamu fic
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:/
#i dont think my bf realizes how i feel :(#i was like we should try to get some free time together cause we have barely seen each other in like 2 weeks#and when we do its like mostly in semi professional setting#so its not like............. us.............#like the most weve gotten is i waited for his bus with him for like 10 minutes on monday#otherwise weve like barely actually talked or hung out or even seen each other.........#well i guess there was two weeks ago where i cried on him for an hour#but like THATS IT 😭😭😭#but when i said that he was like oh weve got lots of time#like YES BUT i also miss you and i see you every other day 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#i also feel uneasy about..... things.........#i think i need to think about my feelings and why i feel like this#and like yeah i get that we're both busy especially him so i understand if its impossible to actually get the time to hang out#but at least like make an effort?? like even just being like oh maybe next weekend i can spare an afternoon#and then if you end up being busy thats fine! but like you can still act like you want to try even if its unlikely :(#but also like dont pretend if you genuinely arent interested but like........ being dismissed like that hurt 😭😭😭#and i know he doesnt mean it and definitely does want to hang out with me but the reaction still felt bad
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rafe jerking off to one of kook!sweetheart!reader’s pictures and making a mess out of himself? 😵💫
warnings: reader sends pics, male masturbation, suggestive ending
[10:56 PM] sweetheart <3: 1 attached image
[10:56 PM] sweetheart <3: i just got this sample in for my next collection, what do you think?
rafe stared at his phone, utterly speechless at the sight. how was it that he was the one to receive a picture of you in the skimpiest lingerie he’s ever seen?
he swallowed thickly, his jaw clenching as he inspected every detail, every curve of your body in the photo. you were obviously in bed, the thought of him barging into your room and ripping every last piece of lace off of you before fucking you into oblivion was, without a doubt, something he was seriously considering doing right now.
mind scrambling to write a reply, rafe cursed under his breath as another picture lit up his screen.
[11:00 PM] sweetheart <3: 1 attached image
[11:00 PM] sweetheart <3: cute little detail, right?
if rafe thought he was losing his mind at the first photo, he was definitely losing it now. there, in the middle of your bra, hung a small gold pendant with the letter ‘R’, the damned thing glinting underneath the dim lighting of your room.
rafe was already a jealous hothead, so to see you put his own little mark on you willingly? oh, he was going to show you his appreciation. with his phone long forgotten next to him, rafe stroked his already hard cock, wishing his hand was your own as he brushed the tip with his thumb.
everything you did drove this man insane. the little glances at his lips whenever you two would be flirting, the way you rested your pretty hand on his thigh when he’d make you laugh, all of it— rafe felt it all boiling down to one thing. and he needed it bad.
“s-shit,” rafe shuddered, his eyes screwing shut as he imagined you on top of him, that pendent with his initial swinging in his face as you rode him like there was no tomorrow. he would bet all of his daddy’s money and tanneyhill, that you’d feel like heaven wrapped around him.
it was embarrassing to rafe how fast he felt himself approaching his high. his mouth fell open, a throaty moan falling from his lips as his hips bucked into his fist. he wondered if you’d let him cum or make him work for it, just like everything else.
the first time he tried to talk to you, you ignored him until you saw for yourself that he wasn’t in any other girls ear. everything, whether it was a peck on his cheek, or simply letting him take you out to lunch, you made his actions determine whether or not he was going to get what he wanted.
“holy fuck!” he whispered, his chest now rising and falling as the band in his stomach threatened to snap. never in his life had he wished he was somewhere else right now, that ‘somewhere’ being between your thighs, hearing your sweet cries of pleasure. rafe couldn’t decide if he wanted to fuck his cum inside of you or paint your face, but after this? he figured he’d do both.
“oh, my g-” rafe’s words were cut short when his orgasm hit him, his jaw falling slack as his eyebrows knitted together. spilling his load into his hand, rafe groaned as his cock twitched in his boxers, a hiss sounding from his lips as he continued to move his hand languidly over his length.
by this point, it’d been well over thirty minutes since rafe had left you on seen, your ego a little hurt that he hadn’t responded to any of your texts after you dolled yourself up just for him. just as you were about to call it a night, your phone dinged with a message from none other than the man himself.
[11:33 PM] ray <3: made a mess. i’m getting in the shower and then i’m making my way over there. be ready for me, doll.
#❤︎₊ ⊹ works#₊˚⊹♡ kook!sweetheart!reader#outer banks#outer banks fanfiction#outer banks fic#obx#obx rafe#obx smut#obx fanfiction#obx x reader#rafe cameron#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron prompt#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron x kook!reader#rafe outer banks#rafe edit#rafe fluff#rafe x you#rafe fanfiction#rafe smut#rafe x reader#rafe imagine#rafe fic
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𝐁𝐢𝐠 𝐬𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐞𝐳𝐞
(Riddle, Floyd, Leona, Malleus, Lillia)
Synopsis- reader tends to give really big and tight squeezes similar to Floyd whenever they hug/cuddle/get excited
Warnings- cursing, mood swings (Floyd), accidentally pushing away (riddle)
𝐑𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐞
•he collared you for the first time
•this didn’t really do shit though considering you have zero magic.
•takes him a second to realize then un-collars you!
•After a few times of him lying through his teeth about not liking it, you figured you should stop.
•But those squeeze times had found their way into his schedule, literally.
•so when you stop squeezing him it messes his schedule up! Which is absolutely unacceptable.
•usually he wouldn’t straight up tell you his feelings but his poor poor organized schedule was falling apart! And all because you stopped the squeezing.
•“Why aren’t you doing the squeeze thing anymore?”
•You opened your mouth to answer but seeing his unusually upset expression you kept it shut
•With a shake of your head you bring him into your arms with a big squeeze.
•”Awww you like my squeezes!”
•”shh… you have three hours to make up to me”
•that meaning he made you squeeze him in bed for three hours (after his already busy schedule)
𝐅𝐥𝐨𝐲𝐝
•he fell in love the moment you squeezed him.
•obviously it wasn’t as tight as he does it.
•but he still loves it nonetheless!
•he definitely pouts whenever you arnt squeezing him. Which makes it very inconvenient for Jade and you.
•he’s very clingy though, but if he saw you squeeze someone else, even if it was in a friend way. He gets so jealous!
•when you went to give him a squeeze a few hours after he saw it, he probably would yell at you.
•He has really bad mood swings so it’s not surprising but it didn’t hurt any less.
•depending on your personality this could go two ways-
•first way: you give him space
•he would be more aggressive towards everyone at first.
•Azul and Jade had begged you to calm him down but you stood your ground.
•not wanting to cross his boundaries.
•but after he gets his anger out one way or another, he realizes he royally fucked up.
•Definitely starts crying and finds you, drags you into a bed, and squeezes you. VERY HARD.
•ends in you either passing out or he falls asleep.
•second way: you wait like thirty minutes and give him another squeeze
•after about thirty minutes he should have probably calmed down
•other than his pout and occasional muttering he is actually holding onto you for dear life.
•both ways he bites you tho.
𝐋𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐚
•HE IS LOVIN IT
•When you found him in the botanical garden asleep you thought this was the perfect time to cuddle with him
•momentarily forgetting about your habit
•it woke him up, he probably hisses at you, even when he realizes it’s you.
•Almost shoved you off until he notices that he really likes this.
•often orders Ruggie to escort you to him whenever he is in a bad mood or a squeeze mood.
•I’m gonna be honest I actually can’t imagine if he were to get mad at you for squeezing him, ironic considering his temper
•like Floyd he can and will bite you to get what he wants.
•he flops on top of you often and demands it with light insults.
•Maybe you should try squeezing him whenever he overblots that might work.
•soon finds out he can’t really sleep without the pressure around him.
•one night when you were on a small trip somewhere he couldn’t sleep, so he tried to squeeze himself with his tail.
𝐌𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐮𝐬
•craves it more than anything.
•please don’t stop. He will actually cry.
•he’s really touch staved, so whenever you show up and squeeze him, he returns the gesture
•thinks of it as a human way of expressing love
•which it is to you.
•he’s so adorable, you can’t understand why anyone is Afraid of him. Of course he can be scary but not to you
•He also cries when you do squeeze him, but out of happiness. So either way, if you do or don’t, he will still probably cry.
•Sebek scolds you a lot because you started this and now he often gets really mad and causes thunderstorms.
•sneaks into your dorm and kicks grim off the bed and onto the couch
•poor grim :(
•Sometimes when he’s had a particularly bad day and he needs to unwind he will come to you. Which usually ends up with him letting out some of his more dragon features.
•Not fully though, unless you are okay with him destroying a bit of your dorm house.
•overall he loves you dearly, wouldn’t trade this for anything at all.
•please keep going!
𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐚
•he teases you all the time for it.
•the first time though he was genuinely surprised but wiped that expression off his face VERY quickly
•he sleeps upside down so sometimes he will ask you if you wanna stay upside down with him and do your thing
•most of the time your squeezing sessions will turn into play fight or tickle session instead
•he gets really giddy when it happens
•don’t be fooled though, he will threaten anyone you squeeze.
•also might curse them or something but you don’t need to know that!
•He’s smitten for you though, and even when it sometimes doesn’t feel like it because of his playful demeanor, he truly appreciates these moments with you
•might sometimes mutter things under his breath before he falls asleep in your arms.
• “don’t let me go..”
• “your squeezes are mine…”
•he means the second one in all seriousness though.
•this is one of the most vulnerable times when he is too sleepy to keep his silly facade
•not saying he isn’t silly naturally, but sometimes he covers up his problems with his cuteness or calm demeanor.
•He’s usually not as silly when he’s not with you, but again, sometimes he uses it to cover that he is hurting
•so please don’t call the things he is saying at the moment “silly” because he means them with his whole heart.
•just keep squeezing and reassuring him, and he will open up!
Note- totally not based off the fact I squeeze ppl when I hug/cuddle
#twisted wonderland x reader#twisted wonderland fluff#twisted wonderland#lillia vanrouge#leona kingscholar#twst#riddle rosehearts#floyd leech#malleus draconia#malleus x reader#leona kingsholar x reader#riddle rosehearts x reader#floyd leech x reader#Lillia vanrouge x Reader
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DC x DP: An Atlantean death cult summons Danny to usher in the end of the world. The biggest obstacle to this is that Danny doesn't speak Atlantean and as such has no idea what these weird fish people want.
(Unfortunately, I missed MerMay this year, or y'all would've been gotten soooo much mermaid!Phantom Family stuff istg)
Danny tried not to groan as he stared at the other cultists who wanted him to... do something. Probably evil, but how would he know?
He couldn't understand Atlantean, after all.
But it definitely looked evil, with the wounded dolphin in the middle of the circle with its blood dispersing into the water.
Danny gave a silent prayer, hoping that Cujo could perhaps guide it towards a better afterlife.
Danny sighed, rocking from side to side as he looked down at himself, where his legs had merged together into an orca tail.
At least he was badass as hell while he was summoned as a merman.
He watched blandly as the cultists continued to dance and chant, trying to do something with their ritual that he couldn't understand. He didn't want to rain on their parade, but while he couldn't understand them, it just looked several times more ridiculous.
One of them swam forward to present to him a closed cup full of an unknown thing and Danny just stared at it before turning away.
There were some cries of shock and despair.
Danny looked around for a way to escape, but he would feel bad if he left and these cultists wrecked havoc within the ocean, so he stayed there, watching the reeds move in the water.
Out of the blue, the underwater temple that Danny was in suddenly rocked. A whale crashed into the side of the place and shook the entire ground, causing screams to erupt from the cultists. Danny gave a sigh of relief as he saw a crowd of people swim inside and attack the cultists.
It was finished up rather quickly, as Danny bent down to smudge the rune markings keeping him in the circle.
He looked at the various crowd of people, some of whom he recognized were part of a hero group called the Justice League in this world. In front of them was a blonde man in orange and green, who was staring at him in horror and shock.
Danny gave a reassuring smile and waved goodbye.
"Thanks for taking care of them! See you never! Bye!"
And then he was gone.
#dc x dp#dp x dc#danny phantom x dc#dpxdc#dcxdp#dp x dc crossover#ask#anon ask#danny fenton#ghost king danny#atlantis#idk what to tag tbh#ty for the ask!#mermaid phantom family#orca danny au
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࣪ . ִֶָ๋ KINICH: ❛ it's not the alcohol, i swear! ❜ ♡
pairing: kinich x reader (uses she/her) synopsis: kinich never touches alcohol. the one night he does, he has a very pleasant secret to spill. banner artist: @/Lion_2929 on twitter/x !! wordcount: 1.7k words warnings: lots of alcohol consumption, kinda crack, kinich is drunk the way i feel like he'd be like if he was drunk (talkative and childish) cho's notes: heavily inspired by beer by the itchyworms. hihi happy reads!
Maybe it was a bad idea to go to this party.
“Believe me! I AM the hydro archon!” mualani cried, weakly shoving at chasca’s shoulder.
Definitely a bad idea.
The ignited torches set a cozy atmosphere into the weary inn, the instruments being strung by performers and high spirits of the natlanese only made it more comforting. It was a cold night out, and you had been invited earlier in the day to a party to celebrate the victory of Natlan over the abyss, a week after the intense battle.
Mualani was the one who sent you the invitation, giving another one to kinich when your group were lounging together. kachina threw a small tantrum, whining: “why can’t I go?” making mualani sigh, patting the small child on the head, “sorry kachina, it’s strictly an adult party. And i mean it! I really can’t sneak you in this time.” “I can’t believe they’d send a kid to war, but not to a grown up party.”
Mualani mentioned there would be alcohol, which made your eyes immediately dart to kinich, your close friend along with the other two. You knew he absolutely despised alcohol and he didn’t want to be anywhere near it, given his past surrounding the vice. You noticed how his shoulders had slightly tensed, only to slowly relax again.
“So? Are you guys going~?” mualani coed, trying to convince the both of you to attend.
“I dont know.. I don’t think it’d be fair if only the both of us will-”
“I’ll be there.” You and mualani’s jaw immediately hang, looking at the stone-cold kinich absolutely bewildered. You quickly composed yourself as kinich raised his brow at you, almost saying ‘do you want me to change my mind?’ with his expression alone.
“A-Alright. We’ll be there.”
It was supposed to be a calm party, with only a few drinks.
You only indulged in a glass or two, to join in on the festivities and to really be in the spirits of the party. You were barely tipsy, just a bit flushed with slightly fuzzy thoughts.
Mualani had almost gulped down 4 bottles of beer on her own, thinking and speaking had become one action to her. But that was normal. Mualani was known as the party girl anyway, it was her who carried the mood and laughter, even when she wasn’t making sense. What wasn’t normal, was when kinich decided to become drunk too.
“You.. are not the hydro archon. Stop.. *hic* disrespecting Fontainians.” He mumbled grumpily, slamming his glass onto the wood table with a thud. It was a rare sight; Kinich with his hair a little messier, with rosy cheeks and sleepy eyes. You felt your heart beating a little harder at the sight.
You knew you liked kinich, but there was never a perfect opportunity to confess it. And in the end, you had just decided to keep all the sappy feelings to yourself, not wanting to ruin the perfect friendship the both of you shared.
It caught everyone off guard, when kinich had asked for a taller glass of cold beer after the initial toast. Then he ordered another one, then another.. Then some more.
“But I am! It came to me in a dream!” Mualani continued crying, drunk-stupid tears flowing down her face, frantically turning to him.
“Well i dreamt that i had normal friends, do you think i do?” he spat bitterly, looking at her with narrowed eyes. Kinich was a bit meaner while he was drunk, but he didn’t mean it.
Again, It was supposed to be a calm party, with only a few drinks.
But mualani started trying to turn one of the tables into a surfboard, citlali encouraged her behavior and was even trying to show her ‘how to do it properly’, chasca was nowhere to be found, and kinich was about to release ajaw. The atmosphere was still borderline calm, but if the circus continued to unfold you knew it wouldn’t end well.
You quickly grabbed kinich’s wrist before he could do anything, and suggested a walk. “We do not need ajaw making things worse. Let’s go take a breather.” Kinich’s eyes seemed to fill with some sort of determination for a second, before going back to being expressionless. He took one last bottle of beer with him, and followed your steps.
You brought him out of the weary inn, the cold atmosphere stinging your skin for a moment— It was a beautiful night. The moon was suspended high into the sky, illuminating in its beautiful full circle. with only a few clouds around. It was the perfect night to greet after a party. You walked with kinich out of the stadium, following a random path of pavement.
“I didn’t expect you’d want to get drunk tonight kinich.” You looked at him with a small smile, and admired the new side of him no one really knew.
“Do I always come off boring and lame to you?—” he sighed, bringing the bottle close and popping the cork off with his fingers easily. A subtle flex of his strength. “—I just.. wanted to try something different.” he said, picking his words carefully.
Something about kinich was different.
“Are you alright? You seem.. A little out of it.” you mumbled. He looked like he was avoiding something, or his head was filled with thoughts he so badly wanted to address. His breathing was heavier, his hands were trying to find purpose, and he avoided your eyes.
“I-i’m fine. Just drunk. What’s the big deal?” he mumbled, still apprehensive and shuffled his steps. “..Just drunk, nothing more. Nothing less. Not hiding anything. Hiding nothing at all.”
“Okay okay. Fine.”
You decided to fall silent, and let your eyes linger in the nature around you; Your heart ached a little. The trees slightly swayed to faint music, chatter, and crickets. The stars twinkled high above your heads and it was almost the perfect night. One more thing was missing: Kinich, but sober.
in your mind, the night would've been perfect, if kinich loved you too.
“I can do this.” you turned your head to the dark-haired boozer next to you talking to himself, only to see him drinking the large bottle whole. “ki-kinich! slow down!” You tried to snatch the vessel out of his grasp, but he only turned his head until it quickly ran half-empty, a loud gulp coming from his throat.
He stopped in his tracks and brought the bottle off of his mouth, and wiped the extra carbonation off of his shiny lips and let out a hiccup before meeting your eyes.
“Y/n. I like you.”
“Huh?”
“I like you. Like.. the romantic kind of like. Not the friend kind of like, I mean that I really want to be your boyfriend, kind of like.”
Kinich was a lot more talkative while he was drunk, but you prayed he wasn't a joker too.
Your mind fell silent, running out of words to say. You could suddenly hear your heart beat in your ears, and feel like the world shrunk around the both of you. ‘he's just drunk-'
“And before you say anything.. No. it’s not *hic* the beer. It’s not the alcohol. In fact, i-it’s the beer that’s helping me say everything right now. And if you decide to reject me right now, it’s *hic* also what’s going to make me forget this i-in the morning. Which is why i’m *hic* drinking so m-much.”
He looked so serious, you knew he truly meant his words. His deep emerald eyes stared right into your soul, you almost felt violated. A deep heat rushed to your face, but you were still out of words.
You tried to speak. “B-but.. How? I mean. You never seemed to take interest in me. I thought-”
Kinich quickly takes the bottle back to lips, drinking down the rest and tossing the bottle to the side, burying it into the tall grass. He breathes out a ‘ha!’ sound before his liquid courage started speaking for him again:
“Never took interest in you!? All I ever do is stare at you, *hic* and listen to your stories, and br-briing you fruit, and help you whenever *hic* you break something! All free of charge! And I am a man of mora! Its literally my ancient name!” he whined; it was so unlike him. He was always so composed, mature. He had transformed into a whiny child throwing a fit in 5 bottles of alcohol.
“I’ve always wanted to tell you, but it was you who never seemed interested.” tears started pooling in his lower eyelids, and you feel a sense of panic combining into the butterflies causing a frenzy inside of you.
“Y-you always seemed to *hic* stiff up when i-i tried to compliment you, or you’d always go to other people when you wanted to *hic* ask for an opinion on how you looked or what you should wear. I have opinions too!” tears started streaming down his face. You quickly take his arm and put it over your shoulders, supporting him before he’d drop face-down into the dirt.
“Okay okay! I’m sorry i never asked for your opinion!”
“A-and you always gave a forehead kiss goodnight to kachina and mualani during sleepovers. Why did i never get one!”
“B-because i thought you didn’t want one!”
“Well I did! I really, *hic* really did!”
“okay i’m sorry please stop crying now!” your free hand reaches out to wipe a tear off of his heated face, before your lips planted a quick kiss on his skin. “Can that make up for it for now?”
His cheeks get impossibly rosier, and he thinks to himself, before humming. “...mhm.” his tears slowly coming to a stop, until he's just snifling.
an awkward silence fell between the both of you, as you continued walking down the path. your face still hot, your trying to piece every memory of kinich and you together, trying to see a different angle where he was trying to show you his affections.
“Wait..” his eyes look away from you, and its almost like he tried to piece together a jigsaw puzzle in his head. Like a lightbulb had turned on, he turned back to you with his eyes livelier than they’ve ever been before, a sparkle appearing back into his gradient eyes.
“So do you like me back?” he mumbled meekly, like he tried to hide while asking.
“I do. I really, really do.”
#▸ ✧ ˚ services#genshin impact#genshin impact kinich#kinich genshin#kinich x reader#kinich malipo#kinich imagines#kinich x you#kinich fanfic#genshin fanfic
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need you now
in which an impulsive voicemail leads to some secrets being spilled.
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader. warnings/tags: angst (sorry i’m incapable of being nice lol) hurt/comfort tho!! lil bit of fluff too because i AM capable of being nice, alcohol consumption as a coping mechanism (i’m literally just a girl…) spencer and reader are broken up :( but they’re still sooo in love and it’s soo obvious so it’s fine!! (also it kind of gets fixed at the end-ish. you’ll see *evil smirk*) reader cries a lot (real) spencer is a cutie (as always) spencer and reader sleep together…no like literally, not in a funny business way, some swearing, no use of y/n!!! wc: 3k a/n: hihihi!! so this is my first fan fiction i’ve wrote and completed ever (gulp) it’s also my first time publishing one (gulp) my writing could definitely be better and so could my grammar tbh but i HOPE if you choose to read you’ll enjoy…feedback is always appreciated (plsplspls) also like requests?? if anyone’s into that—id love to write more but inspo is difficult sometimes. if there’s any spelling mistakes im sorry, eye am very tired!! it’s 5am *eye twitching* okay i’m going to sleep, gootbye IF U SAW ME EDITING THIS 5 TIMES NO U DIDNT (i’m bad at tumblr ok..)
“Hi. This is Doctor Spencer Reid. I’m not available right now, but leave a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can…”
His tinny voice cut off to make way for the signature beep of the beginning of a voicemail recording.
You could hang up now—you should hang up now, save yourself some dignity and go drown your sorrows in alcohol like a normal person instead of calling your ex-boyfriend.
You should, but your mouth was opening before your finger could reach the hang-up button, and…and it was a losing battle from the moment you clicked on Spencer’s icon.
“Uh—hi, it’s…it’s me.” You huffed out a sad laugh.
“So, um, I…I tried calling, but you didn’t answer so…” The static buzz of silence hummed through your ear, just inches from where you held your phone with a shaky grip. “maybe you’re on a case or out with friends, or someone else—“ You let the implication hang in the air—the thought of Spencer potentially being in a relationship bringing a lump to your throat.
You swallowed it down.
“I just…I just had an unbelievably shitty day, Spence.” You sniffed, wiping the moisture that had escaped from your eye with your sweater sleeve. “I know you’ve never read A Series of Unfortunate Events but I think I’d give those kids a run for their money.” You tried to laugh but it came out as more of a sob.
You inhaled shakily, trying to collect yourself and remember why on earth you thought it would be a good idea to call Spencer when you’d been broken up for months. Hell, you hadn’t heard from him at all since you had parted ways—except from the odd text about returning each others’ things. It was obvious he had moved on, and here you were, filling up his voicemail with blubbering messages and making references to adolescent books.
“God, sorry about this.” You breathed out a watery chuckle. “I just…didn’t want to be alone, I guess. But that’s-um-not your problem anymore, so I’m—I’m sorry. Have a nice night.” Your voice cracked and you hung up before you could start weeping down the line. You didn’t need to look even more pathetic.
You pulled your phone away from your ear, looking down at his contact photo through blurred vision. He was smiling—not the tight, closed lip smile he gave other people, but a full, bright smile that had his dimples showing. One of your hands was wrapped loosely around his neck and the other was holding your phone just far enough away to capture both of your smiles. Your head was rested on top of his shoulder, tilted just slightly to the left so your temple was brushing against his.
It felt like looking at a vintage photograph—you knew those people and their happiness existed at some point in time, but it wasn’t tangible; you couldn’t verify it was real.
When you were with Spencer, you never doubted how real it was. All you had to was look at him across the room and he’d flash you a smile identical to the one in that photo and you’d just…know.
It felt like forever ago now that you’d been on the receiving end of that grin and it killed you. So much so that before you could consider the repercussions, you were trudging through to your kitchen and grabbing the bottle of whiskey that sat unopened in your cabinet. It had been a present—from Rossi, actually. When Spencer had first introduced you to the team, the older man had given it to you as something of a welcome gift. Of course, he couldn’t have known you weren’t much of a drinker, and since you wanted to make a good impression (and because you were sure it had cost more than all the alcohol you had consumed in your life combined) you accepted it—deciding to save it for a rainy day.
You think this qualified.
You grabbed the bottle, a glass, and padded back through to your living room, slumping onto your couch. You filled your glass up a little less than halfway before gulping it down, enjoying the burn in your throat—it was better than the constant thickness.
You poured yourself another glass before turning on the TV. You weren’t sure what was playing—it didn’t really matter anyway, your vision was already being obscured by tears again.
You thought the pounding was in your head at first—serves you right for drinking half a bottle of whiskey. Only, it wasn’t, because moments later the pounding subsided and instead, your apartment door was opening, casting your pitch-black living room in a yellow glow which temporarily blinded you.
You squeezed your eyes shut, your mind hazy—again, serves you right for drinking half a bottle of whiskey. Someone was calling your name, but there was too much sensory input for you to make out who.
You certainly hoped it wasn’t a paramedic—maybe your neighbour had heard you sobbing for the last four hours and decided you needed a wellness check. Then there were hands on your face, and that had you flicking your eyes open, because you recognised those hands—impossibly soft, with a callus on his trigger finger being the only thing to mar them. Spencer.
“Spencer?” You slurred.
He sighed in exasperation (or relief) and tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear.
“Are you alright? You weren’t answering your phone, I thought…” He trailed off, worry evident in his voice.
You sat up then, trying to compose yourself even though the room was spinning. Fucking whiskey. You rubbed your eyes haphazardly, blinking until you could finally see.
You should’ve stayed bleary-eyed. Because nothing could prepare you for the way your breath hitched when you finally saw him. After months of not seeing each other, Spencer was here, sitting on your couch, and he was looking at you like you were something fragile, and—God, you needed another drink. You turned away from him, reaching for the neck of the bottle as you spoke.
“I’m fine.”
Before you could lift it up, Spencer gently pried your hand away from the bottle with his own, and then slid it across the coffee table with his other.
“You’re drunk. No more of that, please.” His tone wasn’t unkind, but he left no room to argue. You probably would’ve objected anyway, if it weren’t for the way he kept his hand clasped around yours, rubbing soothing circles into your pulse point almost absentmindedly.
You glanced up to him—to stop yourself from staring at your hand in his and how natural it felt, more than anything—but that proved to be a mistake too, because he looked just as beautiful as thirty seconds prior and it felt just as natural for him to be sitting next to you on your sofa, but it wasn’t natural anymore.
“How did you get in?”
“My key.”
“Oh.”
Right. The key that he still had because you refused to meet up with him to let him return it. He tried for weeks to contact you, but you ignored him, because getting the key back meant things were finally over. You supposed he could return it now—maybe that’s why he came in the first place.
“Why did you come?” You asked, your voice impossibly small.
“You called.” He replied—as though he was talking about something as simple as the weather. You call and I come.
You searched in his eyes for any sign of a lie, but of course, there was none. He was being completely genuine—as always. You were the awful ex-girlfriend who left concerning voicemails on his phone and had him travelling to your apartment in the middle of the night only for him to look completely okay with the situation—like there was nothing he’d rather be doing than making sure you were safe.
You couldn’t help the way tears sprung to your eyes or your lip began to tremble as you lolled your head back onto the couch, pulling your gaze away from his.
“Angel, what’s wrong?”
You liked to consider yourself to be a strong person. You had been through things in your life that were objectively worse than your breakup with Spencer, but something about the gentleness of his tone and the way he had let one of his many (past) petnames for you slip had your throat tightening and you ducked your head into your one hand—the other still seized by Spencer’s—to try and muffle a sob.
“Hey,” He trailed his hand that was wrapped around yours up your arm, all the way to your shoulder blade before lightly guiding you towards him. You don’t have enough energy in you to fight his magnetic pull, so you shuffle over until you can bury your head into his shirt. You inhale his scent; vanilla, neroli, and so him it makes you ache.
Stopping your tears is futile—you’d know, they’d barely ceased all night—so you just let them fall, seeping into Spencer’s tie as he rubs one hand softly up and down your back, the other cradling the crown of your head.
His breathing is quiet and slow—the exact opposite of yours—and you try to imitate it—forcing air into your lungs. When your sobbing has turned to shaky breathing and the occasional sniffle, he speaks up.
“Do you want to talk?”
Talk about what? About what had happened today—what had led you to calling him? Talk about how for the last few months, he had been the only person you had wanted to call?
“No.” You hated how pitiful you sounded.
“Okay.”
Spencer didn’t say anything else for a minute—your synchronised breathing being the only thing to stop the room from falling into dead silence.
“You need to rehydrate.” He murmured, smoothing down your hair.
You hummed into him, in no hurry to unwrap yourself from his body. You probably wouldn’t get to be this close to him again, after all.
He moved both of his hands to your biceps, pulling you back slightly so you could look at him. He knitted his brows together in a silent plea which had you rolling your eyes petulantly, your lashes still damp from tears.
“Fine.” You peeled yourself off of him, pushing yourself into a standing position. Horrible mistake. You were still incredibly drunk, turns out, and everything was spinning a little bit and come to think of it, you were also nauseous and—
“Careful, lovely.” Spencer placed his hand firmly on the small of your back, keeping you upright.
and—actually, you were fine now.
He stood too, moving his hand just slightly over to your waist so he could guide you to the kitchen. When he knew you could stand upright—even if you were relying mostly on the counter behind you—he grabbed a glass from your cabinet, moving around effortlessly to pour you some water. The sight was so domestic you almost wanted to cry again. Maybe in some alternate timeline, where you and him could’ve worked, this would be an every day thing—minus the drunk sobbing part, of course.
He handed you the glass of water, watching as you took a few sips. He raised an eyebrow, nodding his head slowly.
“Whole thing, please.”
You let out an exasperated (affectionate) sigh and gulped the rest of it down, setting it on the counter behind you.
“Happy?”
“Very.”
You smirked, trailing your gaze down his body. He was still in his work clothes which, at the very least, meant he wasn’t on a date before he came here. He always changed before dates—well, for you, anyway. You wondered if he had been on any dates since the breakup—you certainly hadn’t. It had been long enough now that it wouldn’t be weird for you to start seeing other people—but you didn’t want to. You weren’t sure you’d ever want to, to be completely honest.
The more you thought about it, the more the whole thing seemed stupid. You didn’t want anyone else, you wanted Spencer. You had tried to get over him but if tonight was any indication—it clearly wasn’t working. You can’t even remember why you broke up in the first place—it all seemed so insignificant now. No amount of pain you had ever experienced in your relationship had come close to that of living without him.
You met his eyes once more and it was like he could see the question brewing. He tried to stop you, calling your name in a quiet warning, but you ignored him.
“Why did we break up?”
He frowned, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth with his tongue in that maddening way he did.
“I—you know why—“
“No, but I don’t! I know things were difficult sometimes but that doesn’t mean it didn’t work. It worked—we worked.” Your eyes were stinging again.
Spencer pressed his index and middle finger into his eye, furrowing his brows.
“I know, I know we worked, angel—but you were sad all the time, remember? I was gone so often and it wasn’t good for you.” His true emotions were indecipherable but his tone was soft, and you wished you could be as calm about this as him. Did he just not care as much as you did?
“But It’s—It’s worse now—“ You choked out, tears falling freely now. “I was sad when you were gone, but you always came back—you don’t come back anymore.”
Spencer removed his hand from his face, flexing it at his side like he was uncertain what to do with himself before taking a stride towards you. He brought a hand to your face, wiping the tears from under your eyes delicately—like you were made of porcelain.
“Listen, sweetheart—alcohol affects your ability to regulate your emotions and I know right now it might feel worse but that doesn’t mean it always—“
“Spencer, stop! It’s not the fucking alcohol, I miss you! I miss you all of the time! Even—even when I’m having a good day—I still want you—and especially when I—when I have a bad day—“ You choked out through heaving breaths.
“Breathe.” He urges, cupping your cheek. And you’re so, so angry, and sad, and tired that you have no choice but to shut up and listen to him. When you’ve adequately calmed down, he moves his hand to your jaw, tilting your head up to look at him.
“I don’t think we should talk about this tonight but I—“ You open your mouth to protest.
“I promise we can talk about it tomorrow when you’re sober—if you still want to.”
Your lip trembles of its own volition and you frown.
“Of course I want to.”
“Okay,”
“Okay.”
He gives your eyes a final wipe before he’s—rather unexpectedly—pulling you into a hug. You all but melt into him, your head finding its home in his sternum and your arms wrapping around his middle. He tilts his head down, kissing the top of your head—and you’re certain you can’t let this go again. You will chain him down before Spencer leaves this apartment again.
Everything is wordless from there—mostly because you’re so, so exhausted that even talking seems like too difficult a task. Spencer helps you find something more comfortable to change into and you pull out an old t-shirt of his and a pair of plaid pyjama pants you had kept here for him. I guess your keeping them ‘just in case you needed them in the future’ had come in handy, after all.
As you washed your face, Spencer snuck through to the kitchen, refilling your water and grabbing two aspirin in a not-so-subtle attempt to help the inevitable hangover you were going to have in the morning.
You caught him placing them on your bedside table and mock gasped.
“Trying to drug me in my sleep so you can make a run for it in the night?”
He grinned lazily—exhaustion creeping up on him as well.
“I wouldn’t dream of it.”
You smiled, flopping yourself onto your bed rather ungraciously. Spencer looked at you like you were something fascinating before biting his lip, clearly deep in thought.
“What?” You let out a self-effacing little chuckle.
“I was just…wondering…if you’d like me to sleep on the couch?”
You probably should’ve been more careful in your facial expressions considering you were still broken up but your thoughts about that offer were obvious.
“No, stay.” Stay in your bed, in your apartment—stay anywhere that was close to you.
Maybe you were coming on a little too strong.
“Unless you want to, I mean—“
“No, no—I’ll stay.” Forever, preferably.
He walked around to the other side of your bed—as he had done so many times before—and sat down, pulling the covers over his legs. You mirrored his movements before flicking your bedside lamp out, turning to face him.
You were a little thankful you were so out of it, because this had the potential to be very awkward otherwise. Spencer shuffled down so that he was at eye level with you, turning to face you as well.
You just stared for a moment, committing him to memory. The moonlight had a way of highlighting all the high points of his face, and the twinkle in his eyes, and—God, you were so glad the moon existed and that Spencer was in your bed that you couldn’t help but giggle.
“What?” Spencer laughed along with you, even though he had no idea what was so funny.
“Nothing. You’re pretty.”
“You’re drunk. Go to sleep.”
“Don’t wanna.”
“Why?”
“Scared you’ll be gone when I wake up—like I made it all up.”
Spencer’s smile faded then, and he looked at you with something that seemed so much like the one thing you had been willing yourself to stop doing the whole time that you’d been broken up, that it almost took your breath away.
“I won’t. I promised, didn’t I?”
You nodded.
“So there’s nothing to worry about. Now get some sleep, lovely.”
You smiled, feeling Spencer’s hand inching towards yours. He intertwined them and gave yours a squeeze.
“Just in case you make a run for it in the night.”
You chuckled, your eyelids fluttering shut. Yeah, you could make it work.
part two!
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