#i couldve given it to someone who couldnt get it

[ravengales-glade]

When will we be able to trade with other players

[billkaulitzwife]

The Outsiders Coping With a Breakup

(ps guys im not over it leave me alone(i also watched the notebook and i hate myself))

Ponyboy

Reading or writing.

How could you ever hurt this little freshman boy he‘s such a sweetheart

He would probably silently cry into a pillow until he thought his lungs were about to collapse or cave in

if this was now … he‘d chain smoke and listen to lana del rey while looking out a moonlit window

he definitely listens to Elvis to get over it.

I don’t know what exactly he would read to get over it but probably some sad ass Edgar Allan Poe. Annabelle Lee lookin ass.

He‘d write the most heart breaking

tear dripping

heavy breathing sad poetry ever.

show him a romance novel.

he’d never stop reading them until he got over it.

just the bare thought of it drives him nuts.

so he reads.

Johnny

if you hurt this man he would probably hurt himself.

he would dream bout it and wake up in cold sweats, tears running down his face.

in all honesty

i think he‘d be artistic with it

he’d somehow turn each and every single tiny thought into something about you

whether it be thinking about a teddy bear then contorting it into nothing but an image of you and him.

he would never be able to look at the places you went together the same.

he would be an artist.

hand him a pencil and he’ll make your heart break and ache.

might etch and sketch on himself to see if you still care.

ps you obviously do.

Dallas

Doesn’t know how.

All this man does is sleep, drink, fuck, repeat.

being honest this manwhore is probably gonna screw every hoe in Tulsa to try and get his mind off of it,

but every path leads back to what he knows best.

he would smoke more,

party more,

drink away all his problems, etc before facing a problem head on.

people may see him as this

uhh

violent gang member hoodlum kid guy man

but deep down hes really just a kid who wishes he couldve given his momma one more hug

a kid that needed to be loved.

a kid that was never taught how to be loved.

Adelaide

crier.

she’s a big ol’ crier, but it doesnt matter since thats not the only way she copes.

she loves to paint and puts every emotion into her paintings.

she may’ve become a kleptomaniac since she needs the supplies.

the curtis boys would

PERSONALLY

kill you if anything happened to her

one heartbreak and shes done for

love? whats that? it isnt real?

dont hurt her no matter what.

she would also turn to cigarettessss (as if she doesnt smoke enough).

adelaide would develop stage five lung cancer before even admitting that love could in the slightest exist anymore.

Sodapop

working.

soda seems like the kinda guy to go through a breakup and cry a lot

but the only thing that really helped was work.

he’d probably get a raise

yk with how hard and how much he’d be working to get over it.

his siblings would warn him about not overworkimg himself

and guess what.

he didnt listen and got really sick from all the stress.

i know for a fact he would keep away from cigarettes even if someone said they help and he believed it

he would only ever listen to the radio

hoping and praying that when he’d hear a love song he‘d hear your voice

Darrell

probably the most sane of everybody while dealing with his bs

he wld obviously be heart broken

but not to the point he needed some insane coping mechanism.

he would probably meditate.

i mean this is the sixties cmon he’s either gonna do wxxd

or meditate.

as soon as a thought of you came up and his mind started to panic he would sit on the couch and

well.

relax.

he probably has the healthiest coping mechanism he’s definitely got his life together

the others are jealous as fuuuuck

Steve

bro wouldnt eat.

every time he thought about the breakup

he thought it was because he was strong enough

or that he was too chubby for his girl.

one time he passed out while on the way to work and the gang freaked out so bad

they couldnt take him to the hospital so they carried him home and stuck a juice box in his mouth

eventually his ass woke up and they all cheered like the war had just ended “HIP HOORAY!”

but then in all seriousness

he needed to get his weight back up so the curtis kids make him eat at their house

even if he says he ate.

theres always snacks for him laying around thay house from then on out

Two-Bit

drinking.

do i have to explain.

in the novel pony said two-bit was famous for shoplifting and his black-handled switchblade…

but for some reason i know he wouldnt shoplift any more.

(he sure did teach adelaide how to tho)

along with his love for “shopping” you gotta remember he’s a heavy alcoholic

he’d drink away all of his problems and thoughts until he blacked out.

his buddies would think its just your average keith

but in all reality he’s really struggling

even though he seems like the usual drunk happy joking guy

HE IS HURTTT.

okay thanks for watching todays vlog

if u ever need to vent please dont be scared to message me bruv im sure Ik how to help.

[stewieonthewall]

(Anon who requested vid link) Thank you for sharing, lucky I have the app. I’ve followed them as well and see a bit of what you’re seeing:

First thing I noticed was initially Liz was so tense, lol poor thing. I mean you never do know what will come out of Georgia’s mouth tbf. And I do also think that felt like a (another?) white flag by GA and subtle acknowledgment of regret/failing Liz. I think there was already some kind of apology well before this, but this one counts (while not being obvious) as special, being a public expression. And honestly given all thats assumed to have happened I'm not sure how much better of a job Amoore couldve done. It was good to see that Liz seemed to genuinely appreciate hearing those nice things (even if a little generic I think it was all honest) Lastly I couldnt help but get a lil laugh out of Liz's "knows me better than most people in the world" comment. Like yeah 😶

THANK YOUUU bc i’m getting called crazy and i don’t like it :(

you’re so right abt it feeling like not the first apology as well ! very much a like “let me try again” type thing

i personally tweaked at liz’s word choice of “acknowledging” bc the way she used it felt like she was implying that it was a chore for georgia which was maybe a jab at her?

yeah no it felt very final in a way that didn’t just give teammates parting ways bc as someone else said it was not at ALL like azzi’s video to li. i do think it was a decent apology tho like i agree that she did as well as she could’ve given the circumstances

[steeltwigz]

cross-posting my ii finale review from twt to here too. guys rambling on twt SUCKS >:( had to break i tup into TEN POSTS ARE YUO FOR RRAL

anyway.

WAITT im in a ranting mood ok. im actually rlly Happy NOT HAPPY uhmmm satisfied but NOT SATISFIED EITHER ughh. im. glad the choice was for mephone 4 to leave. i like that its left open, for the same reason i like why marshmallow leaving in ep 11 was written so definitively. she wanted to get away from the show. and so she Did, completely. she wasnt even in the Comics after that!! she got what she wanted, kind of, sort of. and i feel the same way abt mephone too. he NEEDED to step back from it all, for himself and the people around him, imo. i mean, like he says, he only Made the show to get one up on cobs, and now cobs is gone and mephone needs to figure out who he is Without cobs' influence anymore. i think this is ultimately good for him, the best that couldve happened. and im not upset the contestants aren't sad enough, or whatever. becuz mephones story is Explicitly one abt parental abuse, and like it or not he kind of did the same thing to the contestants that cobs did to him, just in ykno. kind of different ways. they have complicated feelings towards each other and im not surprised most of them didnt react. i doubt most of them knew What to do at all given the situation! i think it was a rlly good choice, narratively speaking. i think it represents the kind of mixed emotions that parental abuse can cause, esp when its in mephones case where it was rlly just a super unfortunate circumstance. ik mephone isnt rlly their parental figure and the crew has stated that he isnt their dad, which i agree with! i like how complex their relationships all are. they feel more real that way? i guess? idk.

sorry this is all becuz i saw a post that read how someone was sad mephone left his support system. but like. the contestants dont rlly Want to be that for him, and not even rlly for each other all the way either, and they dont Have to be. a lot of the cast arent friends and i like that perspective! yeah it sucks that mephone left them, but they all have rlly mixed emotions abt each other, i feel. mephone was in a position of authority that he would occasionally abuse, just out of inexperience and naivete. so the feeling left over is complicated. MUCH LIKE [insert anecdote from my childhood. waves hands nonchalantly to avoid revealing too much abt my personal life].

it resonated with me. i can see a lot of my own relationships reflected in mephone's with the contestants. so YEAH i think the ending was rlly good ^_^ it reminded me a lot of the sturggles i have both as someone with. Not Ideal but also Not Terrible parents. like cobs was inarguably awful, and i think partly mephone thought he couldnt be as bad becuz he wasnt Like That, but it made him underestimate his actions and he ended up overlooking a lot of stuff and hurting his contestants in more emotional ways. Not That I Would Know Anything About That Ha Ha. and now he feels bad. but he doesnt know how to fix it, because you Cant fix it, not without significant personal growth that he seems to recognize Isnt going to happen if he sticks around. so he leaves. for himself, but i think for the contestants also. he doesnt know how to apologize, and i think he feels really guilty too. and the contestants cant say anything becuz Its True and Hes Right, and hoenstly a few of them are probably Happy to see him go too, so they let him leave. idk. its just weird living in that middle space where someone who deeply loves you is also someone whos caused a Lot of your problems. I think part of mephones problem too is that he views them as characters on his show. not like entirely, they're People to him of course, not like how cobs treats his creations. but they also serve a purpose to mephone, to be his friends and entertain him. i do think he genuinely cares about them but i think he also probably has kind of an objectification of them in his mind? uhm. Not That I Would Kno- [gets shot]

tl;dr like. mephone didnt mean to hurt the contestants, but he did because of tragic events beyond his control. but that cant excuse his actions and its a hard situation to fix. tbh there isnt rlly a solution. so him leaving felt profound and understandable. there COULD be a reconciliation, another spin-off series to elaborate and write in a redemption arc. but for now there Isnt. and i dont think there rlly Has to be? i like the bittersweetness. idk. anyway rant over Probably Maybe Idk

[androcola]

do the boys ever get perticually accidentally harsh with mike on his mental health stuff? like ALL OF IT but they are just trying to undertanding him but accidentally make him sad and scared? like did anything rlly break mikes trust with the boys? :( #angst+pain+suffering

YAAY I LOVE ASKS LIKE THIS🤩

id have to say absolutely. mikes mental health caused him to take a LOT of his issues out on them, it was a very complicated situation. Due to the attitude towards mental health back in the 1960s, and because there weren't yet proper words or descriptions of what mike was going thru, the guys unfortunately had settled on the idea that he was just. Crazy. nuts. insane. and that's it. but the still loved him very much.

amd because mike lived such a torturous life and still wasn't receiving the proper treatment he needed, and for a long time, wasn't receiving ANY treatment whatsoever. he was quickly hurdling towards a darkness he may not have come back from, if it weren't for the boys. they did have to Put Up with him a lot. his mental health was very severe all throughout the 60s, Micky had seen his fair share in '65, in what could reasonably called these days as a Toxic friendship. that's how it stayed for the most part as well.

mike never intended any harm, but his PTSD was so very severe he spent a lot of time in fits of rage or psychosis, and of course was made a lot more bitter by the fact that he couldnt be "normal" like everyone else. he was barely functioning at this point. effectively disabled. and given that his physical health was very often on the line too, things were only made more difficult

anyway, yes, the guys were often unintentionally very harsh on him. fights would start, mike was very stubborn and refused at chance for treatment or intervention, and it caused a deep frustration in the guys, because they really did love him so very deeply, and they couldn't stand to watch him being pretty much eaten alive by his own mind. of course even after the events of 1967, he stilled remained very severe, even when he finally began receiving treatment.

because of his stubbornness, things nearly ended several times. they were tearing eachother apart and sometimes it just felt unsalvageable. it's hard to help someone who's so severe, and who doesn't want help, or atleast feels like he didn't need help

they hurt him many many times, he hurt them many many times. there were many times where they couldve handled it differently, but they didnt always have the post "progressive" views on mental health, even though for their time, they could've been considered progressive. they scared him many times, even ended up causing him flashbacks, which often times would cause him to become violent and unreachable.

I think they definitely broke his trust quite a few times, but there were so many things that they didn't know would break his trust. mike was really just so volatile and unpredictable on what would hurt him day to day.

all in all it was a very terrible situation that couldn't have lasted long without the intervention he got in '68 .they were all hurting, and they were all hurting eachother

I think it all got much better in the 80s, when there was finally language to describe mikes mental state. by that time he was much better, managing himself a lot better, but his PTSD was still causing him issues, and becahse it was really CPTSD, he had about a half a million triggers that would show up out of nowhere and really ruin his day. when he was diagnosed with PTSD, that's when things really fell into place for the better, because then he started receiving (mostly) proper treatment for it

he still suffers PTSD issues even in the 90s, but they're nowhere near as severe as the 60s/70s, and he's even better able to talk about it or ask for help when he needs it

[moonlitlex]

i AM very pumped about david and catherine being in the 60th dont get me wrong this is the first time i've been excited about dw in years.

however

comma

it should've been paul. they should've had paul mcgann as the doctor. they couldnt get jodie or ncuti so they should've gotten paul. come on. that dude got one movie and like 5 minutes of cameo of screentime. he deserves more screentime. they honestly didn't even need to do the backwards regeneration thing. they could've just done a thing where we randomly skip back in time to watch some never before seen 8th doctor adventures. wouldn't be that weird. and i want paul to have more screentime.

seriously like eight is SO fun and funny and like paul literally still does dw stuff w big finish and i really feel like he'd be down for filming a couple of specials and like he deserves it. he has SUCH little screentime and genuinely as someone who enjoyed the movie. thats a terrible movie. you couldve given eight good writing.

[suenitos]

about that primos show, i mostly got pissed at the crew's reaction to the hate: "spanish is not even your language, it was forced upon you"/"it's difficult when you're carrying other people's dreams"/"shithole country". Sure, the show is filled with stereotypes and people have the right to be annoyed at that, but them being defensive is for sure not helping their case likeee

i agree and thank you for your perspective h. i saw someone say they couldve avoided a lot of the backlash to the grammatical error HAD THEY SAID canonically the mc is still learning spanish. honestly watching the pilot it wouldve made sense to say that but :/

im pretty sure the "shithole country" thing was meant to be sarcastic and in RESPONSE to that trump comment (given the #ImmigrantsMakeAmericaGreat in the tags of that post) but it DEFINITELY did not come across that way (and tone is hard to decipher on the internet for sure). what annoyed me more about that post was the implication that people in latam "shithole countries" dont and cant have big dreams the way the creator does in the us which contributes TO the propaganda that the US is better and civilized and full of opportunity or whatever (hhhhhhhh.) LOT of thoughts on that. kinda reminds me of those corny posts US latinos who graduate make about their parents crossing the border so they can cross the stage like HELLO??? the fuck they did 💀 you probably weren't even a concept then and THEY probably had shit they wanted to accomplish in their home country too but couldnt! but anyway

the carrying other people's dreams thing is :/// too. i understand feeling fortunate to be in the position you're in as a marginalized creator and also feeling the pressure to deliver a good product FOR your community but what you yourself are accomplishing are not the dreams of other people they're your OWN. or they should be at least. this also kind of extends to the fact that we dont have representation behind the scenes in these projects so i get WHY she said that but it comes across as a bit insulting (see: crossing the stage)

the colonizer language thing... on one hand, factually correct and trying to restrict how language changes over time with culture (nonbinary visibility- latine/x) and how it may collide with others in other countries (spanish + american english-> spanglish) is not good. on the other, spanish has become a fundamental aspect of most latin american cultures and because of that you gotta respect the grammar rule of singular vs plural if youre speaking it 🤦 the fact that mistake got PAST the songwriting phase the recording phase the animating phase and got GREENLIT with NO ONE catching it is ultimately bonkers and like nunki said its a bit lazy given the resources disney has on hand 😒 not even mentioning the irony that the sentence was typed in english but alright

biggest takeaway i got really is that we are an insanely diverse group of people but for some reason we as US-born latinos have a tendency to make it all about us without recognizing our privilege or blind spots as a result of being a citizen in the US. which DOES come with its own set of challenges, but we are not gods gift to earth for being latino and born in the US come on

[unlimitedhorsepower]

i wish this was spoilers for t&b2 2nd cour but its not. i just wish yuri adopted lara because her mother sucks. i think yuri would be a great dad despite him probably not believing he can be an explicitly positive influence on anyones life...

i think yuri would uniquely understand lara because theyve experienced some similar things in their lives (awful parents & accidental manslaughter in self-defense)

this is just an AU but huge spoiler warning for t&b 2nd cour happenings under the cut where i explain this AU in more detail (seriously dont read unless you already saw the 2nd cour):

again if you clicked the readmore open on accident, implied and explicitly stated huge massive spoilers for t&b2 2nd cour just below this text.

-

first of all, did i cry while drawing this? yeah. dude i am not coping....

anyways i cant get over the fact that lara killed a villain in self-defense and on accident in the 1st cour and it wasnt brought up again, she was just fine about it. plus im seething that her mother “cared about lara for real actually”, or so i understood and i dont feel like rewatching that. i dont have any sympathy for her mom...

i think the only person who could possibly know half of it and also understand lara is yuri, in regards to awful parenting and killing someone as a child in self-defense both.

yuri definitely has looked up laras information and is at least peripherally aware of her mothers circumstances, etc, we know for a fact yuri keeps up-to-date on classified information on the heroes, and just in the 1st cour he was effortlessly holding a law class for children.

i think laras mother couldve given her an ultimatum on how she is her mother and legally lara cant really do anything without a guardian- shes 14, so i dont think she can be a hero without her parents approval, and realistically paolin couldnt whisk lara away from her legal guardian no matter how much she wanted to help.

given an ultimatum from laras mother, i think paolin shouldve definitely tried to whisk lara away in the childish sense of “lets run out of here now, i dont have time to think it through but i dont want to let your horrible mother take you to a different city to put you through all of this again because i care about you”.

its not realistic, of course, and i think paolin would be aware enough of it and also retroactive enough to seek help she can think of: agnes and yuri, who are her superiors and the first authority figures she can think of since the heroes are more familiar to her

i do want to think the heroes would have some sort of legislature considering child heroes, that while imperfect (obviously, since why do child heroes exist in the first place...) are in some ways effective in protecting the rights of underage heroes, including something that makes sure theyre not manipulated in their position or somesuch.

i think the legislature would allow the judicial bureau to immediately restrict the activities of a hero if applicable and place them under alternative guardianship and for the reasons of yuri ending up as laras guardian, include something that the guardianship can be immediately transferred if a suitable guardian is found (has to be a higher-up or somesuch to begin with maybe)

its just for plot reasonings, though, and similarly i think laras mother would realize where paolin mustve taken lara and follow the two girls.

i think yuri couldve lost his mother shortly before this, but in any case, agnes isnt evil but she really doesnt feel like someone who wants to take care of a child. in a moment of weakness and his sense of justice and personal trauma, i think yuri would sign the motion and when questioned who the guardian may be, he just says its him.

i like to think he wouldnt have let laras mother take her, not after any hurried explanation from paolin and just laras body language around her mother...

which yuri regrets immediately afterwards mostly because he doesnt see himself suitable to take care of anyone any longer, even if his mothers death doesnt have anything to do with him etc.

lara would definitely think yuri is scary and intimidating, and he can be very stoic, but hes not cruel at all. lara could hug him without permission and scare herself, especially with how she got tears and snot all over his suit. yuri would be surprised by a hug but only because he doesnt know how to deal with positive things happening to him, and the rest of it is quite alright.

as it turns out, hes actually very kind and very mindful of laras feelings, whereas lara has never been in a position where she has felt free to express herself in any negative manner without being reprimanded and controlled by her mother.

yuri is also undeniably a foil to kotetsu in many ways, and to have him assume a parental role with a child would be very fitting. in contrast to kotetsus mother and bother supporting him freely and kaede being his biological child, yuri is inadvertently making his own family after fully losing it (in more ways than one, by having terrible experiences and quite literally his parents dying) by growing very fond of lara.

and i think kotetsus career in heroism has led to him at times neglect kaede, especially when she didnt know about his hero identity (despite his best efforts, because hes been so busy). yuri, however, would be such a wonderful parental figure in every way in a relatively effortless way, even if he may appear distant at times- he would just be worried about lara.

but i think lara would grow to trust him quickly, because he doesnt raise his voice nor punish her, and hes very gentle despite his meticulous demeanor.

yuri getting enrichment in his cage of sorrows because somehow, due to this, hes breaking the cycles that have kept him captive his entire life. he becomes gentler with himself because of lara talking about her feelings to him and he has to accept that if it was not a sin for lara to have killed in self-defense, perhaps he can truly forgive himself for his original sin.

i think lara couldve been cleared fit for herowork again, but yuri sees her hesitancy and asks her whats wrong, and lara would trust him enough to dare to eventually admit that she doesnt want yuri to abandon her because she cant be useful as a hero anymore, but that she doesnt even want to be a hero.

her heroism was her mothers dream, and after what happened to her and accidental manslaughter, she doesnt want anything to do with hero work on the field anymore.

it wouldve been refreshing to have someone who just doesnt want to be a hero anymore, for very understandable reasons. yuri wouldnt have been angry with her, he wouldve told her that she doesnt have to be a hero if she doesnt want to. she doesnt have to be anything... and what she experienced on the field was undeniably frightening, even without her mother having pushed her into the hero career.

and anyways, at that point, lara could just say she wishes yuri was her dad and cause yuri enter such an emotional turmoil he doesnt know what to do with himself but in a way thats somehow positive.

he would have his own reservations about it, but like, thats something hed solve by himself instead of dumping it on lara.

paolin wouldnt have been disappointed in lara either, and whereas laras mother things you have to pick between things, paolin wouldve respected laras wishes and assured her that of course theyll be best buddies forever, even if she ends up getting a new buddy hero partner. she doesnt have to choose between friends, she can be friends with multiple people at once.

i think lara couldve just become yuris daughter. yuris ties are as garish as they have always been, but theyre so cutesy now because he lets lara pick them. he has ties with hearts and flowers and stars and licensed cartoon characters. all of his private folders are now marked with cute stickers in addition to the meticulous numbering system he uses.

lara couldve been part of the whole message of “you can still be a hero even if you dont have X power or do X things”, because even if her NEXT ability is powerful, she just doesnt have the will to be a superhero. instead she would be free to choose her own path and i think she still wouldve wanted to help people some way: maybe she wouldve gotten interested in yuris career as a judge and study hard so that she could be just like him.

t&b really hasnt had anyone who has just given up on heroism,and sometimes “giving up” is the kindest thing you can do to yourself... and i just feel if theres someone else who would benefit seeing “giving up” as something positive, its yuri. because hes so strict with himself.

it wouldve been lovely to see him gain some more substance in his life and for him to see that even if he doesnt feel that way, he can be kind and gentle and a positive influence on someones life, because hes not an awful person...

like my status if you cried lol (yeah im fucking crying btw)

anyway if anyone else thinks this concept is cute and doodles something or whatever i would LOVE to see it and would love if you could tag me in that stuff... or hearing your opinions

well thats it... if you read this far youre a fucking trooper but thanks for doing so. accepting thoughts and prayers in these trying times (said through gritted teeth)

[ankhisms]

i thankfully have seen at least one other person also talk about this and id rather ppl not rb this bc i dont want weirdos arguing me and im about to pass out so this might be worded weird but it trult just makes me so mad to have witnessed people literally being harrassed to the point of being driven off this website and having their blogs deleted multiple times and being sent the most cruel and heartless messages all because they made donation posts and are in need of help and then to see people now suddenly able to give this website money to sponsor the dumbest fucking posts like youre telling me that people will be completely without compassion for people who are just trying to eat and get the help they need to survive and people will ignore donation posts or harrass the ppl whove made them but theyll spend over 10 dollars on sponsoring a post on this website. like u rlly couldnt have sent a few bucks to someone in need?? instead ur gonna spend it on having a fucking tumblr post show up on someones dash randomly?? again im very tired so forgive my weird wording but basically im saying that it is so unbelievable to me how cruel people are about mutual aid and donation posts and how ppl will turn around and throw around money they couldve given to people who need help and are asking for help on this site and instead spend that money on sponsored posts. anyway

[tiens-letters]

upon autumns day, where you and I met. upon autumns day where I remember all of what we were before youve passed. and upon autumns day would I have ever so slowly let go of that pain of the past

zhongli (angst)

@albeidoof its somewhere here hehehe

Time was a luxury. A treasure each and everything holds.

Yet time is a curse as well. It covets, devours and leaves. which humanity neglects to cherish until the heart ceases its steady rythmn, only then do they regret of the wasted minutes, hours and seconds.

Beneath the flow of the rushing waves of things that have come and gone. Only on this particular day would he sit beneath a certain tree. The rough bark brushing up against his back as leaves fell effortlessly to the ground, as if it were ready to let go of from the branches that gave birth to it, only to return once again to the waiting soil.

It was a sunny afternoon, clear of any clouds and only clear unblemished blue, a good time to enjoy a warm cup of tea yet there was no energy in his bones to even move from where he was.

He felt exhausted. Desultory even.

Gone were the halcyon days of the past, and now the present time of the vivid reality he had to face.

Morax, rex lapis, the geo archon. Names that weighted more than one could carry, memories that shackled his soul that lived for a thousand years on end, all but a stain that could never be washed away.

The breeze slowly danced in, playing with his hair softly, kissing his skin and welcoming him. It carried a hint of aromatic essence only he would know belongs to.

You.

He tried to desperately recount the days after youve left the face of the earth and yet he could not remember or did his mind not allow him to as if he did, it would bring him terrible and heavy consequences for an answer, one sane mind would never want to know.

Sighing, he sat back and recalled back the memories of you instead. When you were alive, warm and breathing in his arms. He remembers the way your eyes would shine brightly whenever he would be around, or the small sound of delight you would make when you have finished another one of the many interesting blends of tea youve done over the course of a week of mixing different flowers and tea leaves. Youve made up quite the fortune with this as your little hobby bloomed into a fully run business known across teyvat.

"Zhongli." he froze, youve never called him by his name ever since youve started getting close, it made him feal uneasy as he turned to look at you who stood by the doorway, a neutral look on your face.

"y-yes?" nervousness clawed at him as he racked his brain to what he couldve done for you to call his name like that, he couldnt think of any.

"I came back from the market and I heard youve made quite the generous payment. Why is that, I wonder?" he's done it again, that spending habit of his

"The price was reasonable for such a fine ceramic tea set, I dont seem to find why it shouldnt reflect its quality?" you sighed as you pointed towards the glass cupboard behind him

"You bought the same exact set a week ago, Zhongli. Thats why." having to realize his mistake after looking over the two identical set that on the shelf, he turned to apologize but only to see you missing from the doorway. Footsteps can be heard from the floorboards above him. You were upset.

After minutes of pacing in the living room, he finally mustered the courage to climb the stairs and enter your shared bedroom. A figure already under the sheets as the warm glow of the lamp illuminated your delicate features. The mattress sunk as he sat beside you, fingers brushing away the stray hair that fell on your face.

"Im still mad at you Zhongli." his hand flinched slightly at the way you called him

"I apologize. I seem to not have learned my lesson again. I would gladly return the set tomorrow."

"Its no use, they dont accept refunds." you replied without sparing a glance at him

"What can I do for you to forgive me then?"

"Just go to sleep, Zhongli." groaning you reached for the switch to shut the lamp off but a gentle grip stopped you, forcing you to look at his gloomy expression. Perhaps you went too far this time.

"Please stop calling me in that way. I dont like it." he whispers, drawing your palm to his lips, leaving small kisses upon it. He sure does know his way around your heart, no wonder why you could not stay mad at him.

"Just be mindful next time." you cursed yourself for being weak to his charms.

"I will." yet something was missing "Then can you call me as you did before?"

"Zhongli?" you could see the slight grimace in his face as you teased him

"Stop it." he kissed you without warning "Call me as you did before."

However, his lips didnt stop as they began to travel. From your cheeks to you forehead and then to your neck. Oh dear, he wasnt having any of your teasing.

"A-li." you giggled beneath him as he finally stopped and met your gaze

"Thats better."

He still remembers the faint smile that graced your lips whenever he would wake up next to you tangled in the same sheets. The softness of your skin on his calloused touch. Your lips melting his and your voice lulling his raging mind to peace.

Then everything changed when you drew blood that spilled from those lips he's kissed for a thousand times, painting a morbid image on the sheets. Anger and despair boiled inside of him once he learned of the secret youve kept. Zhongli was a calm and collected man all of the time except when he was with you.

Having to witness him at such a point felt as if his own spear was being driven right through his very chest. He held you in an arms width away, the panic and pain in his eyes increasing over the minute as he begged for you to explain why youve decided to lie about the flowers that bloomed in your lungs, the sickness youve inherited from your deceased mother, whose fate you soon would follow. You didnt want him to find out, not in this way.

He couldve done anything if he knew from the start but alas, you wanted to be cruel, thinking it was for the best. Until your symptoms persisted, a heavy reminder of the remaining distance of the string you have to walk on to reach the end. The heavy feeling in your chest started to worsen as cherry sweet liquid poured from your mouth.

Soon the once pristine sheets were stained in haunting crimson shades as you heaved and he watched in agony. If only he had the ability of what he once had back then, if only he could plant the seeds of the flowers from yours to his then he would, if only he hadnt met you one autumn evening

" please dont look at me like that. " you told him, cold hands caressing his cheeks, catching the streams of salty warm beads that fell freely from your darling's amber eyes.

"Im sorry. Im so sorry..." the last thing you wanted to see was this man to cry. The last thing you wanted to see was to see him relive the past tragic memories you promised to bring him out of

" my disease has nothing to do with you. In the end it was mine alone to handle. oh, you are far from that so please dont you ever blame yourself."

"How can I not? If I havent fallen so deep then you would experienced so much more in life, you couldve been happier if you met someone else. Yet you chose me and I couldnt give you anything, I--. " the words knotted up as he began to shake, hands holding yours as knuckles turned to white

You slapped him.

With all the strength youve gathered in that fading body of yours. The sound cutting the grieving sounds that spilled from him, soul and flesh alike.

"A-li, look at me. Do I look like someone whose unsatisfied with what youve given me? Did my smile ever fade when Im with you? Did your affections ever lack? Answer me." his watery gaze met yours, a torrent of emotions swimming in them

"No. Never." a soft smile was carved unto your lips

"My dear, youve given me all Ive ever wanted in this life and I regret nothing of it."

To him, you were the flower that bloomed at the highest peak of the mountain he's never reached and yet its petals voluntarily detached and fell down, making him the happiest as one thing he's admired was untouchable and now, lay softly in the palm of his hands. To cherish and to protect.

But of course, all things are evanescent.

The familiar feeling of soreness that wasnt supposed to be there rose, ebbed and flowed through his throat. He knew it all too well, it was after he woke from his week long slumber did he feel it along with what his ancient beating heart felt.

"You collapsed." the worried words of the qixing echoed in his head. He frantically got up but as soon as his feet touched the floor did his legs give out underneath him, what use was he in this sorry state. He was helped up and sat back on the edge of the bed.

He wanted to ask many things yet was unable to.

Ningguang spoke as if you were still breathing and was visiting her minutes ago with another one of your tea blends. "Dont worry and rest first, go to jueyun karst after. They will be waiting."

To where the adepti resides, who as well, favored you, that one soul among thousands of others. One to which they shared a few good memories with was allowed to slumber there in peace.

Zhongli found himself waking up to the sun setting in the horizon. Just like how youve gone and resurfaced back into his memories. It was time.

He stood up from where he sat, gloved hands brushing any dirt that clung to him as he made his way to where you slept.

The red bean that was planted by himself still remained, a token of his love for you. Picking one bead and placing it inside the hollow dice he brought along, completing another one of the similar handicraft he's made every visit.

The sun finally died and the moon began its reign. The small wisps of light gathered around before him, forming a blurry image.

It was then he felt at ease, he saw you smiling at him with all there is in the world. Your light seemed to dim a little, hinting the blessing the adepti gave was slowly diminishing. Soon your visits would cease and you were sure that by the end of the power spent, he wouldve let go of the torment that plagued him.

"A-li. Have you been well?" he knew what you meant

"Im letting go slowly my dear. Perhaps in time, I would learn breathe easily once again."

Longest yet lol. Hope yall liked it ehehe

[youngbeanpole]

A message from BP’s mail-lady

hoo boy here we go. this is gonna be a long post.

hi! im lemon, and i started this blog on april 2nd 2012. and today, april 22nd 2021, im posting beanpole’s last message here. its been one hell of a ride.

how it all started i was 15, spending time on tumblr, when i suddenly started seeing people posting about this movie that was about to be released soon, called the lorax. now, im not american, so i had never really heard of dr seuss, but people were so enthusiastic! so i watched a shitty cam-rip of the movie and joined the fandom. 

and then the askblogs started, the first one i came across being swag, of course. i had run askblogs for other fandoms before, so i wanted to join in on the fun. but regular once-ler was already taken... and green suit once-lers, and audrey and ted too... so i had to come up with something original. 

the movie started with the once-ler leaving home and his family showing just how awful they were, and i started thinking, ‘man, his childhood mustve sucked..’ ‘haha what if i made a blog about once-ler when he was my age?’ 

an impulse decision that somehow gained me 100 followers in a week. somehow relatable tumblr teen once-ler was relatable to 2012 tumblr. who couldve known? 

i get kinda emotional looking back at it, honestly. people were so fun and creative. id stay up late to keep talking to people (bc timezones are hell). and i had a lot of fun just pretending to be a flawed boy, one who seemed nice but could be rather snarky, who would lie and break promises at the drop of a hat, but only because he didnt know any better, not out of malice. and i couldnt have done it without you all. i never wouldve known that he hates tomatoes, or likes celine dion, or wears the same thneed every dang day just because that happened to be his icon. 

was it silly to get obsessed with a childrens movie? maybe. but i had a great time.  (im also happy to see there are still people in the fandom that are carrying on the legacy... you guys rock)

truffula flu i think most people that remember bp remember him from truffula flu’s camp entre, over at youngbeansprout... a blog ive sadly lost the password to. im a big baby so i never thought id enjoy writing about something as scary as zombies, but i saw my friends doing it so i went in blind, without any idea on a backstory for the au or whatever.  ....which is probably why he wasnt always all that prominent in the story, haha. well, that, and timezones. 

it was probably an even wilder time than running this blog was, because there was actual plot. and people would liveblog it. and make fanart. and cosplay??? someone out there? cosplayed my oc to a convention? its one of those things that make you go. huh. i made something cool. probably never gonna reach that high ever again, but it sure is a fond memory. i still have a folder on my computer with all the fanart and it still brings a smile to my face.

also... i never did get to finish zombie au’s story, but i did plan how it would end. so if youve managed to read this far, congratulations! youve hit the hidden deep lore.

---

so the thing with truffula flu was that entre made the trees fucked up, right? and those spores would turn ppl into zombies. and of course you could become a zombie from being bitten, but it also traveled through the air...

everyone in camp entre (who wasnt immune or already infected) wore a gasmask, a bandana, something to cover their mouth. bp, who wandered into the apocalypse by accident, did not. he didnt even know. 

so little by little, the spores gathered in his lungs, until he realized. oh no. im getting sick. oh no. oh no oh no oh no. he messed around audrey’s equipment to confirm he was infected, and he got scared. he was a scared kid and he was going to die.

except. ted had handed him a cure for safe-keeping. a cure bp had sworn to protect with his life. but it could save him, right? in a moment of cowardice, he uses it on himself... only to find out there never was a cure.  (now heres the part where my memory gets fuzzy but) the ‘’’cure’’’ was given to ted, who was already slightly rotting, meant as a mercy kill. the people who gave him the cure assumed he would use it on himself.

except ted was a good kid, who wanted to use the cure to help others. and beanpole? his lies and broken promises came back to bite him in the ass, and he died sudden and alone. the end. :)

ANYWAY

the end of an era ive wanted to wrap this blog up for several years now but i never knew how. younger me wanted to give him a happy ending, which back then i thought was getting him a girlfriend. 

but as i got older, i realized... not everything can be fixed with a relationship. he’d have to learn to overcome his flaws by himself, learn his lesson about honesty and sincerity and the dangers of greed. and then, maybe he’ll have a happy ending.

so as he rides into the sunset on this day, imagine. maybe he’ll end up cutting down a forest and regretting it the rest of his life. maybe he’ll become a rock-star. an inventor. a teacher. a gentleman. a cannibal? okay, maybe not that one or maybe he’ll continue traveling forever, singing songs about boredom.

who knows? there’s infinite possibilites out there.

--

and with that, im logging off too. if you ever need me, ill be over on twitter as his deoncelerized self, bean. 

<3

[insecxreasalwqys]

Hate you <3   -Chishiya

Not canon. Btw, in this, borderland never happened.

“Good morning, Chishiya-sama.” One of the other doctors said. “Morning.” Chishiya said, forcing a smile. They were, not friends, but they were usually put together to do stuff, and they were in school together. Chishiya didn’t hate the guy, he just didn’t like him. No hard feelings. He was probably the only person there Shuntaro could tolerate. Dont get him started on this girl who he hated. She was so annoying, how she even got into med school, let alone become a doctor, was beyond his understanding.  Later that week, he met with Niragi to have some coffee. “So, hows work?” Chishiya asked. “I mean, its, ok?” Niragi replied. “You?” Niragi asked. “Its been fine, besides this one girl-” Chishiya started. “You talk about her all the time, i get it. Shes useless, dumb, and annoying.” Niragi finished for him. Chishiya just looked at him, impressed, followed by a nod. “Do you, like her, or something?” Niragi asked, raising one eyebrow, or attempting, atleast. “What the heck? No? Ive told you, like 5,965 times already i dont want a relationship, and even if i did, you can bet it wouldnt be her.” Chishiya snapped back, almost offended. Niragi couldnt help but let out a chuckle. Not loud, but audible.

They went to niragis house, since it was late and his house was closer. “Wanna race?” Niragi offered. “Why would i do that.” Chishiya asked, raising his eybrow, but successfully, unlike someone. “Because, you will?” Niragi said, in a tone that said ‘duh’. “Fine, you know what? I will.” Chishiya said, smirking. “Ok, well then,” Niragi said, smiling in victory. “3, 2, 1-” Niragi started, but that little a**hole started without him. Chishiya wasnt very athletic, or wasnt interested in sports, but boy was he fast. “Thats not fair!” Niragi shouted, chasing after him, they were on his front lawn. Niragi ran as fast as he could, and when he got next to Chishiya, pulled him back, it didnt hurt him, no, just to stop him. Well, it kinda backfired on Niragi bc he fell too, but it was 100 percent worth it. Niragi attempted to tickle him, but unluckily for him, chishiya wasnt ticklish. Niragi was disappointed, but he still felt like he won. “Are you serious?!” Chishiya said, annoyed. “Im wearing white.”He added. “Well maybe, Mr. Im better than you should think before he acts-!” Niragi said, laughing at the end. “Well, may-be!” Chishiya pouted, admitting to defeat. “Jerk.” He whispered, jokingly, a smile spreading across his face.  “You can sleep on the floor.” Niragi decided. “Oh come on, niragi, that was 4 years ago! Let it go!” Chishiya whined. “No!” Niragi said. Smiling. Chishiya rolled his eyes and said nothing.  When niragi woke up, he saw that chishiya wasnt there, he must’ve walked back. Well, i couldve given him a ride back. Niragi thought to himself. In the corner of his eye, he saw a note. It read: 

                 To whom it may concern, i wanted to let you know that you suck, and i hate you. <3.

             Your best friend, Shuntaro Chishiya, Mr. Im better than you. P.S, youre late :)

“SERIOUSLY?!” Niragi yelled, now he really hoped chishiya tripped.

[insfiringyou]

dating someone like him so why did js not vocalize these until it became too much? if she brought up how she felt about this before she couldnt take it anymore, would it have made any much of a difference? bc its not like yg couldve done anything about it. they wouldve still broken up regardless? i know the breakup was necessary but could itve been avoided? imo i think it couldve been avoided had they communicated this before but maybe she'd just be miserable still - n e way it just made sad😭

Hi, thanks so much for reading our work and glad you are invested! :)

Honestly, we have always said, even when we were outlining the breakup, that it is a really hard one to vocalise because there was no single thing which led to her breaking up with him. He wasn't a bad boyfriend or person and yes she still loved him and could tolerate the inconveniences of being with someone famous, such as being long distance.

I think the truth behind her (very hard and heartbreaking - on both their parts) decision to break up with him was the realisation that he was going to give up everything to be with her. Over the months before the break up, he was becoming more and more reliant on their relationship to make him happy. He would have given up everything to be with her, since he himself was the one finding it hard to be apart from her so often and for so many periods of time. In the fics which run up to the break up, such as 'A Celebration to Forget', 'Stranded', and the phone sex fic, you see how desperate he is becoming and how he's starting to care less about the career he has worked so long and hard for. Jeong-sun, ultimately, didn't want him to have to make that choice between her and being famous as she could see how torn he was becoming (even though she never asked that of him). Also, neither of them really meant to fall so hard for each other. It's not like with some of the other couples where they made a conscious decision to get together (with the girls choosing to date someone famous and knowing what that involved). We don't think Jeong-sun really had any idea what she was getting herself into (other than knowing he was famous - as she's not someone who follows Idols or Korean celebrities much) and also she started dating him quite casually (even if things became intense and sexual very quickly). She never really thought she would fall for him and wasn't really looking or seeking out a boyfriend or relationship. Likewise, Yoongi wasn't looking for a girlfriend but found himself falling so hard for her. So the timing was really bad for them both. Yoongi and BTS at this point were becoming really really famous, especially abroad, and Jeong-sun didn't want him to give up all that at the height of his fame. She knew he would regret it, but also didn't want to be 'responsible' for that. In a way, her breaking up with him was her way of being kind and ensuring he didn't make a decision which would hurt him.

In contrast, when they get back together - he has already completed his service (and several of the members are currently serving) so he has no band commitments. He's at a point where BTS are starting to settle down (Jin is married, etc.) and so the timing feels right that he can focus on what is important to him (showing Jeong-sun the love he has always wanted to and being able to actually spent time with her) without also having to sacrifice his career.

Pre-breakup, he literally would have given up everything for her in a heartbeat, but things would have naturally ended (in a messier and worse way) with Jeong-sun if he had because that's a lot of pressure to put someone under. Jeong-sun, who thinks of herself as really mundane and normal, really wouldn't want to be on that kind of pedestal. So, she quite cleanly broke things off with him. Yes, she hurt him and was hurt herself, but things would have been worse if she'd have stayed with him and broke up later. Especially if she had accepted his proposal in 'Stranded' and they rushed into marriage etc.

I hope this makes sense. We really love discussing the reasoning behind certain decisions and how we interpret things, but also readers sometimes have their own interpretations of events and feelings which we love to hear!!!

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

[sablesides-writing-corner]

Can we get a coffee shop meet cute thing with fem! sides please... I too am craving some lesbians... maybe with Logince?

Lucy was never one for tv tropes, she thought most of them were rather stupid honestly, I mean who falls in love that quickly? Especially without even thinking of the consequences or what kind of person you may be in love with.

Lucy was smarter than that, she had the sense to know that it was impossible to fall in love with a person you'd only just met.

Or at least, she thought she had, until a new coffee shop opened a few buildings down from her apartment.

She'd gone to check it out, only to meet the most gorgeous barista she'd ever laid eyes on. Long red hair, striking green eyes, brilliantly red lips, it was almost to much.

Of course Lucy couldnt let her know that, oh nonono that would ruin her chances for sure.

So she visited occasionally, glancing in the Batista's direction every so often.

Her name was Rose, a fitting name for someone oh so breathtakingly lovely.

"Order for Lucy?" She called, turning the cup every so often. Lucy stood from her table and walked to retrieve the item.

"Thank you-" Lucy said with a smile as she took the coffee in her hands, it was warm, much like her face felt currently.

"Check the bottom when you're done," Rose said with a smirk before turning to go back to her own business.

And of course Lucy couldve listened to this advice, or she couldve tried to look as soon as she sat down and spilled coffee all over her dress and legs.

"Oh my goodness gracious-" Lucy winced, so maybe she wasnt as smart as she thought.

"I told you not to tilt it yet," Rose said with a laugh as she walked over with napkins.

"I got over-excited," Lucy mumbled, shivering as Rose's fingers traced over her while helping remove the coffee stains.

"Well maybe I shouldve just given you my number outright then," Rose said with a smirk.

"You were-" Lucy's face flushed bright pink.

"I wanted to see if youd want to go out some time," Rose replied.

"I-Id love to!-" Lucy said, giggling slightly.

Ok, so maybe, some tv tropes werent so bad.

----------------------------------------------

Tag list:

@nova-xx

@softestpatton

@meowthefluffy

@a-deceit-salad

@nerosdayinhell

@soupforfree

@willowaudreykeyes

@frawkeye

@the-sad-strawberry

@sneaky-slytherin

@private-snippers

[magicflowershop]

one day kitty; Kita version

《inspired by movie A Whisker Away》

✿✿ you wished to be with the person you like and wish granted. whiskers, button nose, tail, four legs and ears on top of the head; you turned into a cat. with this, you are given the opportunity to be with the person you want to express your affections to. but as a cat. and only in one day.

― haikyuu characters x cat!reader imagines!

❀ masterlist ❀

the wheel of names have spoken.

kita was having a good time by himself in his grandmother’s rice fields, feeling the breeze like the precious farm boi he is,,, when he saw a cat sleeping on a wet patch in the middle of the field

gathering concern for the little cat, he brought him home and decided to clean it up 

then you woke up

you felt something scrubbing your back when you open your eyes you see a guy aiming a hose at you 

you scream bc obv, but that scream translated into a screech leaving your mouth and you see your hand

homie that was a paw

why do u have a paw?????

"stay still, you might hurt yourself”

and why is there a Kita Shinsuke spraying water at you lmao

you see that he’s kinda annoyed that you’re moving so much while he’s trying to clean you up but at the same time you arent sure since he isnt easy to read and that don’t know him too well rip so you let yourself be cleaned for free ig

but yo what the hell??? so you’re a cat now????

you try to remember what happened before all this and how in the world you suddenly turned into a cat and magically wake up in Kita’s place 

you dont know the exact location of his place so you have no idea how to get back home from here

Kita pulled the cat closer to him, and wiping the wet fur with a towel as generously as he could that the cat soon found comfort from his gentle caresses

okay maybe you could stay for a while yk huehue

“you’re having fun”

you hear a familiar voice from a mile away, you look back and see a fat, creepy cat standing on two of its hind feet

o wait

you saw that cat last night when you were watching the shooting star outside,,, you thought it’d be cute if you suddenly wished for something so you did then that thing appeared outta nowhere promising you that he can make your wish come true than compared to a stupid star

so he forced the wish outta you

that you wished to be closer to a guy you admired,, and you had a lot of crushes in your school ykyk,,, just that Kita takes the entire cake

“you have until midnight to remain as a cat. be sure to leisurely fulfill your desires, y/n.”

and so he vanished

while knowing full well you’re basically Cinderella now, you take consideration of your leisure time with Kita-sama

do you stay or do you go home first to check on your household

“oh what do we have here?”

Kita’s grandma entered the scene and you think that okay maybe this development is a little too quick since you weren’t ready to face his relatives yet

“i found this cat in the fields. it looked like it could get sick so i cleaned it”

o yea you were a damn cat

also Kita calls you freakin “it”

:) 

pennywise who

you chose to stay in Kita’s place bc grandma thought it’d be lovely to let you stay there for a while,, and that you looked like you were starving when you saw the food on the table

thank goodness you were a cat bc jesus were you actually drooling

so you spent time in Kita’s place big deal

but his place isn’t what you’re aimed for no?

“i’m leaving”

Kita says putting on his shoes, ready to leave and he’s wearing casual clothes,, you don’t think he’s going to school for volleyball practice

IS HE GOING ON A DATE????????????

lmao

as if thats actually true cmon Kita doesn’t even hang out with girls that much,,, even though he prolly has a bunch of admirers like the other Inarizaki Vball bois

but what if he swang that wae?

??????????

so you followed him right?

you wanted to find out where he’s headed also that he looked good in casual clothes you just want to keep looking at him like this 

Kita went to the grocery store

ah

and apparently he was buying ingredients to make food

ahh

so you begin to think that you were foolish for lowkey gate-keeping him

like sis cmon you’re a cat rn keep your head in the game,, what do you do with those paws of yours that cant even grab his hand and pull him away when he was about to bump into a girl as he was about to grab a bottle of tomato paste

heck you cant even get inside the damn grocery store and walk in between them cause you’re a fcking cat!!!!!!!!

you watch their mouths say sorries to each other

the girl was blushing

hm?

Kita looked worried that he couldve hurt her since the hag was coverin her face

hm

nani k

n̸̢̪̜͚͑́̾́̑̋ á̴̠̜̳͖̼̃͗̚͘͠ͅ n̵̼͙͇̻̹̓͜͜ i̷̥̲̻̪͈̞̙̩͛̾̅̓͝͝͠ ̶̨̡̜̞̟͆̿̈́͜ḵ̶̂̓̀̚ o̶͎͛̋̋̊͋̊̅̈̅ͅ r̶͙̮̱͊̎͠ ę̷̺̪͎͈̗̖̯̣͍͒͊̒͆͂̈́͛́̒̃

you started tapping the glass windows like mad SKSKD

and ofc since you’re a stray animal ppl wont let u get away with absolutely anything so one personnel saw you tapping the windows and shouted at you from inside the store

Kita and the hag saw you and yea that was enough embarrassment for the day, you ran away and let your feet take you wherever 

its a bit boring that since its a weekend there’s nothing to do,, you never expected that Kita’s weekends would be this boring too :(

so the creepy cat appeared

“what’s wrong you dont seem to be enjoying yourself anymore”

“turn me back to human i need to finish my homework”

maybe thats not the most liable excuse you have but it is true that you need to finish an assignment

“but i gave you a chance to be with the person you admire, no? is this not enough?”

“yea well its-”

“here you are”

you feel someone pick you up and you see that it was Kita:0he must’ve looked for you since you dont even know where you are

oh my god Kita Shinsuke looked for you ma’am eye- or mayhaps you took the route back to his house without knowing since you were busy staring at him when you were stalking him earlier ye

you watched how he looked at the creepy cat you were talking to and and judged it from head to hind feet lmao Kita

“do you have the same owner as this cat?”

he asked you and you gave out every ounce of your energy to shake your head as a no as well as to let out the most disgusted and disapproval meow you ever could-

“the hell would i want to be acquainted with that thing!”

a

what

no way did u just speak

so Kita stared at you for the remainder of the time but decided you speaking isnt physically possible and that he could’ve been real tired since he saw the Miya twins along the way

he took you back home since his grandma seemed to be real happy seeing a little animal in the house with them

but you didnt miss to see the little knowing smile from the creepy cat from earlier, you just knew from that alone that he was messing with you since as you said you were bored 

it was wrong of you to talk to that lil disgusting thing

since that moment you refused to speak with your mouth every again, if you were going to speak thought you would probably just purposely say meow only to not make anymore mistakes

also you’re spending a lot of time with Kita’s grandma than Kita himself

“i wonder what your future spouse is doing at this moment, Shin-kun”

Kita looked like he wanted to roll his eyes so bad lmao since he always hears things about his grandma wanting to see his wedding before she dies :c

and yk it makes you sad too just hearing about this

and you want to help 😔

and you would offer help 😌

they heard the cat speak and now you’re running away bc they heard you talk about wanting to marry Shinsuke 🤡

the day ended and you managed to go home before the sun set basically nothing happened and your transformation was all for nuttin, you were bamboozled by a demon cat you randomly saw one night

the next day you were back to your human self and it was a school day so ofc you have to live on normally in school as if nothing happened, as if you didnt just stalk a guy from your school but we’ll get to that

see, you’re friends are friends with a few of the guys from your school’s volleyball team,,, so you’re within vicinity of Kita’s attention 

when you explicitly did not want to see him atm

BUT THEN YOU REMEMBER YOUR FRIENDS KNOW YOU LIKE KITA

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU DO NOW

you decided to run away but you realize that’s useless bc you’re all going home together :D

now you weren’t the crowds type of person,, you had no idea how it come to this, you’re used to hanging out with your girlfriends yes but they were having fun altogether like this it was fun just watching them goof off and whatnot

“hey”

when i told you you’re almost dropped the second you hear Kita calling to you, you best believe

you said hey but in a different tone of voice bc it was too early for him to notice you had the same voice as the cat he saw yesterday,,, then you both walked in silence

you couldnt take it anymore and decided to go to the nearest convenience store since you had something you want to buy,, you went and whispered this to your friends but when they were asking you to let your voice out, you were deadass croaking

but then you clown yourself sum more bc Kita was concerned of you acting like this and asked if you were alright

now you’re stuck with him in the convenience store bc your friends and his friends thought it’d be a great idea for him to go with you :D

“you should eat something warm before going to sleep, and take a warm bath too”

:((((((

okay now you feel bad for actually making him worry lol

your alibi of getting sick works really well with not speaking at all around him so you used this till the end thinking you can escape him with this until it rained and you dont have an umbrella with you

aight y/n you’re one hell of a clutz

Kita was enough of a gentleman to buy an umbrella for you until its actually out of stock

you guys stayed in the convenience store for the time being

you were losing your mind

how much longer will you stay with him

you thought of an alibi to save you from the embarrassment so you told him you gotta jet and go back to school bc you forgot to bring your notebook with you 

but now you realize you realize you didnt have to tell him bc he’ll still follow you as if his life depends on taking care of you :(

after you randomly stormed out of the convenience store, he caught up to you and pulled you somewhere where there’s a roof over

“are you usually this reckless? or do you just like getting yourself sick?”

homie does not hold back

he pulled a spare shirt from his back and put it on your head,, proceeding to wipe your wet hair with it until he realized he’s subconsciously invading your personal space

he looked right at you, so you two were standing there,,, staring,, his hands on both sides of your head,,,,, both of y’all are wet hunni

he let go and turned the other way,,, the darkness wasnt dark enough to conceal his red cheeks and hunni you made him blush aight

“you reminded me of a cat i saw yesterday im sorry about that”

“you dont have to apologize”

o sis you did it now

you s p o k e

so Kita was beyond surprised to hear that voice again,,,, and this time from yOU,, ALL NORMAL,, NO FROGS

“i, i can explain”

he looked at you confused, hell was he so confused, that you sounded exactly like the voice he randomly heard yesterday which made him think that came from the cat,, he didnt think that was physically possible bc yk but the embarrassment from your face was enough for him to guess

“did you really say you’re willing to marry me”

gOD

“i mean,,, i don’t mind”

“grandma would be glad”

stay tuned for more!