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thefallennightmare · 4 days ago

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Just Pretend-Thirty One[FINALE]

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader

Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut(18+), star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse, talks of death, depressive thoughts, talks about not being able to conceive, and endometriosis.

Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.

Authors Note: After over a year of writing this story, we finally are at the end. I have so many things to say yet I think I will bask in the moment for a little bit before I bore you with my emotions. So please take this for now: Thank you all so fucking much for your endless love and support for this silly little fic. It started off as a simple request(i hope you're still around 🎧 ). But it brought me so many friendships. I owe you all so much. Forever grateful for every single one of you.

My inbox will forever be open if you want to talk about the finale. 🖤

Huge thank you to my loves @blueskylinesx and @artificialbreezy for your endless support and helping me with the vows. I love you both immensely.

Angel and Mochi forever. 🪽🍡

Tags[CLOSED]: @blueskylinesx @missduffsblog @hayleylatour @sleepyomens @loeytuan98 @artificialbreezy @marvelousmal @bngurngheart @wild-child-7747 @calleyx13 @illmakeyousaywow @jaded-and-hollow-souls @shayzillaaaa @badomensls @shadowseve @collective-heartbreak @klutzy-kay24 @sorrowsofsilence @sweetlittlekitsune @shilohrosechicken @itsafullmoon @toospooktocute @niicoleleigh @thatchickwiththecamera @hoe-for-daddywise @whenthesummerdies @thisbicc @sammyjoeee @joe9cool @ozwriterchick @happi-goth @dsireland86 @cncohshit @heyyoplayer @rain-down-on-mee @respectfulrebel @malerieee @myownthoughts12 @noahsbong @laurpartyprogram @cloudykoookie @sideeyenoah @bellaboo967 @rxdlstgn @anthemheatwave @lobolocaamo @amelia-acero @karenfrancoespinosa-blog @collidewiththesavannah @xserenax-13 @supersquirrel1996 @themodern-daywednesday @oxythoughtin7715

THIS IS FICTION. NONE OF THIS IS REAL.

READER

ONE MONTH LATER.

“Noah,” I choked out while gazing up at the familiar home with tears filling my eyes.

He stood behind me with his arms wrapped around my waist and his chin resting on top of my head. We both swayed with the sudden rush of wind which caused Noah to hold me tighter, bringing the warmth from his body to my own.

“Are you mad?” He asked.

I couldn’t remove my eyes from the SOLD sign on the front yard of the familiar house and the key Chase was dangling in front of my face with a shit eating grin. A month ago on that night underneath the fairy lights, Noah proposed with the ring hanging on Kuma’s new collar. When I found the ring and looked over at Noah that night, he said two simple words.

“Marry me.”

I accepted before he finished the words, nearly tackling him to the ground. We connected that night underneath the fairy lights, his cock slowly dragging in and out of me while I rocked my hips up into him. Afterwards, we lay together tangled underneath the stars with the blanket barely covering us as we talked about our wedding plans. Our conversation during our many 2pm Facetime calls was something we both remembered fondly.

With a hesitant sigh, I nodded. "Japan is just such an important place to me, for several reasons. I have this little fantasy that I’d run off and get married there. It's so peaceful and quiet with my closest friends and family. One and done romance type shit."

Noah stiffened while scratching his chin.

"What? I freak you out, girlfriend?" | joked with a teasing smirk.

He chuckled nervously. "No. I- uh, who's the groom?"

"I don't know, never got that far. It's always been the small child in me's dream."

It took some time with many nights of wondering if I was worthy enough but I found my groom.

So when we broke the news to everyone two days later, wanting to bask in it privately beforehand, we told everyone that we’d be getting married in Japan. But with the future shows both Bad Omens and Hollow Souls had planned, we knew we would either have to push off the wedding for a couple years or get married before the shows.

Now, a month later, all of us were in Japan for our wedding that was happening in a few days. It wasn’t anything big and lavish, something small with our family; some old and some new.

“You bought my dad’s house?” I asked while peering over my shoulder at him.

Noah turned me around so I could face him head on and pressed my hands against his chest, the diamond on my left ring finger catching the light of the setting sun.

“I contacted a realtor shortly after we left about buying your dads house. It didn’t feel right letting it go to someone else. Your dad lived here for half of his life, Y/N. It deserves to stay in the family,” he explained.

I blew out a shaky breath while resting my head against his shoulder, those strong arms wrapping around me yet again.

“Thank you.”

Noah brushed his lips over my forehead. “You’re not mad I bought a house without asking you? Especially your dad’s house?”

“Not at all. I was at a dark point in my life the last time we were here that all I wanted was to forget about this place. But I’m so thankful you bought it,” I slipped my hands up his sweater over his stomach, grazing my nails over the warm skin.

Chase stepped into my view as my face was buried into Noah’s chest and he was twirling the key around his finger. “We replaced most of the furniture you had sold before you put it up on the market. Noah hired a paint crew to come through and put a fresh coat everywhere. It’s like a new house but still has the old bones of when your dad lived here, if that makes sense.”

Stepping out of Noah’s embrace, I pulled Chase in for a hug while smushing his face into my chest and kissed the top of his head which due to how tall he was made it difficult.

“I love you, bud.”

He grumbled under his breath while pushing me back into Noah’s embrace and adjusting his messed up shirt. Even with his teasing, I could see the love in his bright blue eyes.

“Keep it up and you’re walking yourself down the aisle,” Chase taunted and then turned on his heels to walk over to Malcolm, who had been unloading the rental car.

As the two of them shared a kiss, I called out to them while Noah and I continued to stand on the front step of our new home.

“I’m going to drag you guys down the aisle with me if I have too!”

Noah chuckled, brushing a kiss across my lips. “I can’t believe we’re getting married.”

“I know!” I giggled while wrapping my hands behind his neck. “Do you think we kind of jump the gun, though? We don’t have a venue. The only thing we have planned is my dress, your outfit, and the bridal party.”

“About that,” he sprawled his hands over my lower back as everyone else moved around us, bringing in their suitcases into the house.

It was decided that we all would stay here because we had plenty of space.

“How would you feel about getting married in the backyard? I know it might not be your dream wedding but I just thought it would be perfect. Lots of space for all of us, privacy fence so no one can spy on us, and the girls already have an idea on how to decorate it. If you’re alright with that. We don’t want you to feel pressured-.”

I placed a hand over Noah’s mouth to stop his rambling. “Mochi, you know you ramble when you’re nervous?”

He nodded as I continued. “We could literally get married in the bedroom with just us two and it would be my dream wedding.”

Matt suddenly appeared over Noah’s shoulder. “Technically it wouldn’t be legal unless you had someone who was ordained.”

Rolling my eyes, I let my hand drop from Noah’s mouth only to link my fingers with his as we began slowly walking up the rest of the way towards the front door with Matt.

“Speaking of being ordained, did you do what you needed to?” Noah asked.

“Yes. I am officially ordained in Japan,” Matt wore a big smile. “So I get to marry my best friends.”

“How’s Dove feeling?” I asked while motioning towards Matt’s cousin, who was off to the far side of the yard with Faye, having their own conversation.

“She’s okay, might take some time but she’ll get there,” Matt nodded while stuffing his hands into the pocket of his hoodie. “I appreciate you guys letting her come, given you don’t really know her.”

Noah waved him off. “Dove is your cousin, Matt. Which means she’s family, just like you.”

“I’ve always watched out for her when we were growing up so whatever I can do to protect her, I’ll do it.”

Once Matt left us to run towards Faye and Dove, I felt Noah squeeze my hand which caused me to gaze over at him with furrowed brows.

“Did your mom ever call you back?” He wondered.

I scoffed, doing my best not to let the anger I felt festering inside of me not ruin the whirlwind high we’d been feeling since our proposal last month.

“Nope. I left her a voicemail all three times that I called her to tell her what’s going on,” I answered.

Noah’s shoulders fell. “Does that make you upset?”

“Honestly?” I shrugged. “Not really. She’d never been around for any other big moments of my life. I have everyone here that’s important to me. That’s all that matters.”

With a smile, he motioned towards the house behind me. “Are you ready to go inside?”

“Oh,” I muttered as my shoulders fell because I realized that this would be the first time I stepped inside my dad’s place since his funeral.

Well, now I guess it would be our house.

Glancing over my shoulder to the front door less than a few feet in front of us, I gnawed on the inside of my cheek. Chase and Noah mentioned that it was basically a new house inside with a fresh coat of paint and new furniture. Deep down I knew that even though everything was new inside, my dad’s spirit would be lingering there.

“Yeah,” I finally nodded while looking back at him. “I’ve been telling myself it’s a fresh start, ya know?”

With a tender kiss to my hand, Noah led me through the front door as we took the first step together towards our future.

READER

“What the fuck!? JOE!” I yelled while pushing away from the table and running towards the familiar face that had just walked into the ramen restaurant.

Joe broke out in laughter as I nearly tackled him to the ground. “Hey kid.”

All of us were having a little makeshift rehearsal dinner at a ramen place that my dad loved the night before the wedding. We all made plans for when Bad Omens, ERRA, and Hollow Souls played Inkarceration. Then spent most of the night reminiscing on past memories. Every so often, I’d catch Noah looking at his phone before letting his gaze linger on the door of the restaurant but never thought much of it. I’d been in a deep conversation with Dove as she talked about what happened when she was on the road a month ago.

“What the hell are you doing in Japan?” I asked Joe after pulling away from our hug.

“Oh you know, I was in the neighborhood and thought I’d come by to say hello,” he playfully smirked.

I rolled my eyes as I felt Noah walk up beside me, giving Joe a handshake. “Thanks for coming. I know it was kind of last minute.”

Joe waved Noah off. “All good. Thank you guys for the invite.”

My stomach dropped when I realized from the craziness of the last month, I’d forgotten to invite one of my good friends. Forever thankful that Noah thought of it, I rose on my toes to place a kiss on his cheek.

“You thought of everything, huh?” I breathed in his ear.

Noah looked at me, something mischievous in his ember eyes. “You have no idea, angel.”

Dragging both Joe and Noah back to the table, we all eased back into the dinner and every so often I’d feel Noah squeeze my thigh before inching his fingers up closer to my core. With the amount of people in the house, we decided that we would hold off on sex until our wedding night.

Needless to say, both of us were extremely wound up but I kept telling myself that it would all be worth it in two nights' time when we finally had the house to ourselves.

Once we all finished dinner, we all piled out of the restaurant with a suggestion from Nicholas to check out the local market in town. While most of the group dispersed in their own directions, Noah and I found ourselves alone for the first time in hours.

“I’m so stuffed,” Noah groaned while rubbing a hand over his stomach.

I wrapped my arms tighter around him while burying my face into his chest as we walked down the market block in Japan.

“Are you happy you finally got your real ramen?” I teased while poking his chest.

With a playful roll of his eyes, Noah brushed a kiss along my forehead as we walked through the crowds of people that gathered at the market. Earlier before dinner, I’d bought about four different mangas that had characters on the cover that looked like Noah, something he made sure to grumble about.

“How the hell does this Yamada guy look like me?” He asked, utterly confused while holding up one of the mangas.

I snatched it from him, holding it close to my chest. “I bet if I found a picture of you with this exact hair cut and did a side by side comparison, you’d see I’m right. Too bad you cut your hair yesterday.”

Noah’s hair had been unruly lately so with the wedding coming up, he’d shaved the ends while still keeping the levi cut up top. Even though I'd always love his longer hair, I had to admit he looked absolutely gorgeous this way as well.

“Y/N, look,” Noah pulled us to a stop, his arms around my shoulder, and pointed in front of us.

Following his long finger, my eyes landed on a familiar older figure standing at one of the book tents in the market.

“It’s older you!” I squealed, a little too loudly.

The older gentleman looked over towards us at my outburst and when the look of remembrance crossed his face, he gave us a small wave.

“Well, look who it is!” Older Noah smiled while walking over to us. “What are the odds I’d run into you guys in Japan?”

Throughout the years, this was the third time we’d run into the older gentleman and his wife. The first time at the coffee shop back when Bad Omens and Hollow Souls toured together, the second time when Noah and I spent the afternoon at the pier where he bought me ice cream, and now here in Japan. Yet it was then that I noticed he was alone.

“Ah, yes,” Older Noah tapped the book against his chest when he noticed me looking around. “My Allie passed away a month ago.”

Both Noah and I sucked in a breath, something the older one waved off. “Please, no pity. She lived a good and long life before the Alzhiemers took her.”

“Are you in Japan alone?” Noah wondered.

“No,” the older one shook his head before adjusting his glasses. “My granddaughter, Lori is around here somewhere. What brings you two to Japan?”

Noah linked my hand in his and brough the ring up to his lips, peppering it in kisses. “We’re getting married.”

Older Noah’s eyes lit up at the news. “Well, good for you two! I still remember seeing you two in that coffee shop so long ago. The love in your eyes when you looked at her.”

A crimson hue covered Noah’s face and I giggled while swinging our hands together.

“I can’t explain it,” Old Noah began while flipping through the book he always seemed to have with him. “Something told me that I’d be running into you two again and soon which is why I made sure to bring this book with me. I read it to my Allie almost every night since it was her favorite.”

Through the hustle and bustle of the market crowd, we barely could hear the soft sob that fell from Older Noah’s lips before he continued. “Since there’s no use for it anymore, I think I’ll give it to you two as a wedding gift.”

Noah shook his head. “We can’t. That book means a lot to you-.”

“Nonsense,” Older Noah smiled. “Please take it. My Allie would want you to have it.”

Gently I took the old book from his shaking hands and immediately brought it to my chest. “Thank you, Noah. You barely know us but for you to trust us with something so special to you, means a lot.”

He stuffed his hands in the pocket of his tan coat. “You two remind me of me and Allie when we were young.”

My Noah pressed a kiss to the side of my head and pulled me into his chest. “Do you have any advice for us to make our marriage last as long as yours did?”

Older Noah gave us a faint smile while someone from behind him waved after him, calling his name.

“The second you stop loving each other and pretending that your love story isn't real is when one of you starts to think you’re not worthy of the other.”

Just as a young woman tapped her hand on Older Noah’s shoulder, Michael appeared next to me, almost out of breath.

“Whatever you do, don’t ask Dove for a race. She’s way to fucking fast,” he took a large gulp of air.

“Grandpa! You can’t just wander off like that,” the woman next to Older Noah chastised him while adjusting her red cat eye framed glasses.

Something in the air shifted around us when Michael and the woman, who I assumed was Lori the granddaughter, caught sight of each other. I could see something change inside of Michael as his eyes lit up with something I recognized so often in Noah’s eyes.

Tapping my Noah’s chest, I glanced over at him while Michael introduced himself to Older Noah and Lori.

“Think we can add two more to our guest list?” I asked.

Noah smirked. “Already two steps ahead of you, angel.”

NOAH

Hiding a yawn behind my hand, I eased back into the couch a bit more while stretching my long legs out farther. The house finally settled down, all of the girls retreating to the larger bedroom to do whatever girls did the night before a wedding while us guys were scattered throughout the living room. Joe was staying at a hotel down the road and he left a bit ago.

Both Nick’s and Jolly were on one of the couches trying to decide on what to watch. Matt was pacing the length of the kitchen practicing his speech for tomorrow. Chase and Malcolm were in the office working on a special project for Y/N for tomorrow. Davis and Bryan were playing a card game at the kitchen table.

Michael, however, was still out on his walk with Lori. After our encounter yesterday, they exchanged numbers and Michael asked her if she wanted to go out on a walk with him.

I was sitting on the couch with Jesse next to me as I scrolled through listings on my phone. Earlier today when Y/N and I were talking about our future after the wedding, the topic of where we would live came up. Even though we both knew Michael and Jesse would never kick us out now that we were married, Y/N felt it would be better for us as a couple if we finally had our own place together.

So after discussing it with her and promising I wouldn’t buy another house without her permission, I had been texting her every possible listing I found. Y/N’s main concern with every single one: Is it too far from everyone?

She knew my end goal in life, after everything settled down in Bad Omens so she understood why I kept sending her listings from far.

"Way down the road maybe one day in the future- to live in the middle of nowhere with a dog, cats, and a family of my own. In my wooden home that I built."

Jesse shifted on the couch next to me causing me to glance over at him. “How’s Salem and Kuma?”

“JT said they’re good. He took Kuma on a three mile run earlier so he’s currently passed out in the middle of his kitchen floor,” Jesse chuckled.

Since most of us were in Japan, we needed someone to watch Salem and Kuma. JT immediately offered when Jesse brought it up.

“Have you found a place yet?” He asked while motioning to my phone.

I sighed while dropping it to my lap so I could rub out the stress from my temples. “There is one that looks promising. Has everything we need. But the neighbors are about a mile away which is a little too close for us. We envision complete solace. Is that bad?”

He shook his head while running a hand through his unruly curls. “Not at all. It’s fine to want some privacy. I mean, it’s why you guys are thinking of moving out anyway.”

“I know,” I nodded before showing him the listing. “It wouldn’t be so bad if one of you guys moved in next door since the house next door is for sale too so maybe I could talk Y/N into buying both so we can have extra space. I emailed the relator earlier so now it’s the waiting game. ��

Over my laughter from my joke, I nearly missed the way Jesse let out a low hum as he clicked on the listing for the house next door.

THIRD PERSON POV

A soft breeze blew through the bright cherry blossom stems, bringing a sense of calm to everyone who sat, patiently waiting to watch a harmony of two people becoming one. They all waited with baited breath for Y/N to emerge from the back door while Noah stood at the end of the aisle with Matt. Noah radiated nerves and did his best to keep his shaking hands hidden behind his back so he didn’t run them through his hair. It had been slicked back perfectly for the wedding and he couldn’t risk messing it up before Y/N saw it.

Even though a lot of aspects of their wedding wasn’t traditional, Y/N still wanted to keep some parts. They hadn’t seen each other since late last night after Noah and her snuck into the bathroom for a sweet kiss goodnight. While the guys got ready, the girls went out for breakfast. When it was time for Y/N and the rest were time to get ready, all of the guys went for lunch. Anything they could to stay away from each other. Noah didn’t want to risk ruining her big moment so he did his best to stay far away from her; even if it was killing him on the inside.

Noah was dressed in a pair of black slacks and a white button up shirt, something he didn’t wear often. On the lapels of his dress shirt were angel wings pins that connected with a golden chain. The sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, showcasing not only his tattoos but also the silver bracelet; the one that mirrored Y/N’s.

Matt bumped his shoulder with Noah’s. “How are you feeling?”

“Like I’m going to throw up all over my shoes,” he admitted with a staggered breath.

“Just take deep breaths like Dr. P instructs you. It’s just Y/N, no need to be nervous,” Matt assured Noah before pressing down the front of his shirt.

When Matt asked Y/N last night if he could still wear his hat during the ceremony, Faye immediately smacked him upside the head causing said hat to fall to the ground.

“These are your best friends, Matthew! You’re not wearing a hat during the ceremony!” Faye chastised him.

So now, here Matt was standing next to Noah, ready to officiate the wedding while wearing a black button up with pants to match and his blonde locks pulled back into a low bun. Faye couldn’t stop staring at him as she stood off to the side, one of Y/N’s bridesmaids.

Astrid was the maid of honor, followed by Tay and Faye as bridesmaids. On Noah’s side it was Nicholas as the best man, given their years of friendship and history. Jesse and Joakim were the other two groomsmen. Although they had a big family, Noah and Y/N decided on keeping the bridal party small.

The backyard was littered with vast amounts of Japanese lanterns that illuminated the space around them as the sun was beginning to set. There was a large cherry blossom tree in the yard where Noah stood, waiting for his bride. A few petals managed to fall off a branch with a sudden gust of wind and lingered on his shoulder. As he was about to brush them away, there was a soft voice that seemed to whisper in his ear, halting Noah. Just as the patio doors opened, a butterfly landed on the other shoulder and that voice from earlier spoke in his ear again.

“Think I’d miss this?”

Noah’s eyes snapped over to the two empty chairs in the front row. One with a picture of Y/N’s father and the other, the one that had his immediate attention, was a picture of Keaton.

“Glad you’re here, buddy,” Noah spoke under his breath.

The speakers that Matt had set up in the yard began to play a familiar tune; an instrumental version of You and I. Like a lot of other things in their wedding, the song that Y/N chose to walk down the aisle wasn't the typical song played at every other wedding. They wanted to be different, to show that their love was different than anyone else's. Their love story wasn’t like any told in existence or written in books.

The clouds above in the sun kissed sky opened up to let those rays paint the figure at the end of the aisle who was flanked by Chase on one side and Malcolm on the other. Suddenly, a flash of every moment between them flashed in Noah’s eyes; the good, the bad, the private ones. Everything they’d gone through the last couple years, from the moment he stepped off the tour bus to right now. It was all worth it.

Noah was worthy.

Y/N was worthy.

And now, in a matter of minutes, their bodies and souls would collide while they danced together in the moonlight as the stars aligned for them.

The moment Noah’s eyes locked with Y/N’s, all of the breath had been stolen from his lungs. He felt frozen in a time loop, trying to gather if this was real life and he wasn't still stuck in his dreamstate. Tears welled in his eyes as he let out a choked laugh when he saw Malcolm needing a moment before they began their walk towards Noah.

It was evident that everyone was affected in some way or another by seeing Y/N in her dress. Malcolm blew out a few deep breaths before he nodded over to Chase.

“I’m ready.”

Chase raised a brow. “You sure? We can wait another minute if you need.”

Y/N’s eyes widened. “No the fuck we can’t. Noah is waiting for me.”

She was thankful her hair was pulled back by an angel wing hair clip with only a few strands falling in her face because the heat emanating from her body brought a thin sweat to her skin.

“Alright,” Malcolm hooked his arm with hers again. “Let’s get you married.”

With the song still playing, all three of them took a shared breath, before they began the walk down the shortened aisle. While everyone's eyes were on her, Y/N only had eyes for one person.

Noah.

Who currently had tears rolling down his face and made no effort to wipe them away. On one of his shoulders was a few petals from the cherry blossom tree above him while on the other shoulder there was a pretty blue butterfly that made no effort to move. She noticed the angel wings pin on the collar of his shirt as when her gaze fell to the buckle on Noah’s belt, Y/N sucked in a breath.

Her dad.

Noah wore her fathers belt buckle that had his initials. Her dad only wore it on special occasions and he had it in the family for the last 30 years.

As she walked past all of her friends, Joe gave her a wide smirk with a wink; an action that told her one thing.

Told ya you guys would be here.

For a brief moment, Y/N remembered how Joe was there for her when they toured together and assured her that the break between Noah and her were exactly what they needed to get to this moment.

The invisible string that bound them together began to vibrate deep within their chests as Y/N closed the distance to Noah. All day, she’d felt sick because of the nerves that ate away at her. But now that she stood in front of him, all the worry fell to the grass beneath her feet.

With kisses from Chase and Malcom to her cheeks, they gave Y/N away to Noah who took her hand happily.

“Hi, angel,” he let out a giggle.

“Hi yourself, mochi,” she blew out a shaky breath.

One they stood across from each other, Y/N handed her bouquet of Violets over to Astrid while Faye handed her something special.

“Before we get started, I have something for Matt,” Y/N spoke while placing a hat on top of Matt.

The word Officiant was bold and large in white letters on the front.

“Oh thank god,” Matt let out a long breath while adjusting the hat.

“There’s the Matt I know and love,” Y/N smiled before linking hands with Noah again. “Alright, now marry us already because I’m dying to kiss Noah.”

A chorus of laughter echoed in the backyard before finally settling and Matt cleared his throat. Even with the shaking of nerves from Noah, the butterfly on his shoulder didn’t falter and that’s when Y/N got a good look at the three dots on one of the wings. While Matt began his speech, a flutter of wings caught Y/N’s attention for a brief moment. A butterfly with black and yellow stripes landed on her wrist as she continued to hold Noah’s hand. She sucked in a breath when the realization hit what kind of butterfly it was.

A Japanese Luehdorfia.

Y/N’s father spent a lot of his free time while living in Japan studying butterflies and these ones were his favorite. With the butterfly on Noah’s shoulder and the one on her wrist, the final two guests had arrived.

“I love you,” Noah mouthed to her as Matt rambled on about how everyone has a soulmate in their life.

Y/N squeezed his hands. “I love you more.”

“Alright everyone knows how much I love to yap but now it’s time for Noah and Y/N to exchange their vows,” Matt smiled as he took a small step away from them to give them their own space.

Noah cleared his throat before taking a deep breath and did his best to calm the rapid beating of his heart.

“This is about to be long so please bear with me,” Noah jokes.

Jesse parted his lips to say something but with a sharp glare from Tay, he snapped his mouth shut.

“Angel, I never knew truly just how much my life would change when we got the call about us touring together. When we met, I was in a weird place in my life but never knew that in such a short amount of time that everything was going to be okay again. Every moment spent with you that summer was something I could never forget; I didn't want to forget. That was the summer I knew we'd be here, together.”

Y/N squeezed Noah’s hand, both of the butterflies still resting on them, as he continued on with his vows. Everyone realized that he wasn’t reading from something, everything he spoke came from his mind on the fly.

“There was always something that held us away from each other, whether we sucked at communicating. More so, I really sucked at communicating. Or the fear that I wasn't worthy to be loved so strongly by you. The world stopped moving when you walked out that hotel room door. Which is why I made a promise to myself never to see you walk away like that again. Everything that's happened in our lives has led us to this spot. I wrote some silly little words in a hotel room years ago "Would you say I'm worthy?" and not a day goes by where you don't find a way to show me I'm worthy of you. That bracelet on your arm where the butterfly rests, Every morning you're in my bed, every time you burst in the room to share with me an idea for a song or painting you have. After all that time, after all those tears and pain and wondering if I was worthy, I can finally say out loud that we both are worthy. I won't drown you out, and I will wait for you no matter where we are. You were my angel before, and you're my angel now and forever.”

Y/N brushed away the tears with the hand that didn’t have the butterfly resting on her. “Thank Hades for waterproof mascara.”

With his eyes lingering on the silver chain and locket hanging around Y/N’s neck, Noah continued on. “Y/N, I spent so much time overthinking the past, where it slipped away all the time we let escape from the both of us while we tried to heal ourselves so we could be better for each other. At first I succumbed, kept myself numb while I tried to deal with the fact that I may be losing you. But I was not okay, I was not alright. How many times have I survived trying to feel like I’m alive? Never being able to change and get outside of my own head. I thought I knew that you couldn’t change me anyway but that’s where I was wrong, Angel. Because you had already changed me.”

Something shifted in the air around everyone and the butterfly on Noah’s shoulder began flapping its wings, almost like it was ready to take off. Y/N saw something ignite in the dark embers of Noah’s eyes as he spoke the final words of his vows.

“I was a helpless mess but you stole my pain, Novocain. You made me feel alive the moment I first saw you. I know now that I no longer have to survive because now, I have something that makes living so worthy. It’s you. In time the price we pay in pain brought us eternal peace. There is no Angel without Mochi, and there is no Mochi without Angel. I look at you right here before me and the same voice that’s been with me from the first time I met you is singing that it’s all okay. Everything is okay Angel, it’s you and me until forever.”

Just as Noah finished his vows, the butterfly on his shoulder fluttered up into the air to fly around both of them before shooting up into the air.

Swallowing thickly, Y/N adjusted her wrist to grab the papers that Astrid held out to her and yet again, the butterfly on her wrist remained unmoving.

“How the fuck am I supposed to follow that?” She chuckled.

“You can’t,” Noah winked.

Playfully rolling her eyes, Y/N took a centering breath and began reading from the papers in her hands.

“Noah, or Mochi if you will, I was stuck in an endless cycle of never knowing what love truly felt like. I spent so many days and nights wondering when I would bloom. The day I stepped off that bus and saw your face is when I started. I couldn't help myself but wonder if the look in your eyes was real or not, I was so scared you wouldn't see me for more than what everyone made me out to be. Yet you never saw that version of me that people created. You only saw me.”

“That day in the hotel when I walked out, I felt my world break. I knew at that moment it was you and only you but I was so scared I wouldn't be what you wanted or needed. I was so worried I was holding you back from the life you dreamt so heavily of because of my condition. You never saw the endometriosis, you never held those struggles against me. You love me despite all my faults.”

“Those are not faults, Y/N,” Noah wiped a tear away from her face.

Leaning into his palm, she pressed a tender kiss. “I know. It took a lot of sessions with Dr. Poulos for me to realize that I can't let my condition define me, shout out to her for that and put my head on straight.”

Everyone let out a small chuckle of laughter as Older Noah watched with a faint smile on his lips because he knew how well his Allie would relate with Y/N and their shared conditions. But with his granddaughter sitting next to him, Older Noah knew that a miracle could happen for them as well.

“I came from a broken home and was made to believe on one side that I wouldn’t get this; would get this life I created on my own and with you. I was told that no one would love me despite my condition. Not only you, Noah, but everyone here never saw me differently. You all took me in like one of your own, took Chase and Malcolm in. You all were a family but let us in on that first day of tour.”

Bryan snapped away picture after picture, cementing these vows forever with something Y/N and Noah can look back on. Especially when the butterfly on her wrist finally moved for the first time and now rested on her abdomen while Y/N spoke the final proclamation of her love for Noah.

“I always knew it was safer by your side and knew I just had to give it time. Chase and Malcolm always told me "if you can keep the love alive, you'll survive." It was so deep in my soul and I held on to that. Noah, from the moment I walked in your house for that party to the moment we finally admitted it was always going to be you and I. You will forever be worthy of my love. Every breath I take will be for you, from now until the last and after that, meet me in the epilogue so I can find that smile. Mochi, our stars aligned and I'll keep them there for as long as you let me.”

By now, there wasn’t a dry eye in the crowd, especially Nicholas who watched his best friend bounce on the soles of his feet. Noah was ready to kiss his bride. But first, they exchanged rings.

“Well,” Matt cleared his throat, doing his best to mask his emotions. “We’re going to skip over the part where I ask if anyone objects because we all have been waiting for this to happen. So with that being said, by all the powers invented and by that one website, I announce you two husband and wife. Noah, for the love of the Gods, kiss your bride!”

Right as Noah reached for Y/N’s waist, the butterfly fluttered away in the same path the other had done moments ago. With a wink, Noah pulled her to his chest and brushed his lips across hers. It was slow at first, both savoring the moment as the world faded away around them, then all at once the pace increased as the invisible string between them tied the final knot to connect their souls once and for all.

“Mrs. Sebastian,” Noah brushed his nose across Y/N’s.

She broke out in a fit of giggles while wrapping her arms around Noah’s waist to bury her face in his chest. “About fucking time.”

THIRD PERSON POV

The moonlight glimmered high in the sky, bathing everyone in the yard in a luminescent glow. It was well into the evening, everyone calming down from the long day of celebration.

After the ceremony, Noah and Y/N immediately went into the house where Nicholas had his tattoo equipment set up. They each got one simple tattoo on the inside of their wrists.

Worthy.

Now they sat together in one of the large outdoor chairs with Y/N in his lap as Noah buried his face in her neck. His heart would not stop beating wildly in his chest because finally, after all the hell they overcame, they were finally where they were meant to be. They danced together for the first time as husband and wife to Just Pretend-Acoustic; the same version Noah sang to her the night he proposed.

Jolly and Astrid hung off to a secluded corner of the yard while he rested a hand over her bump. She was only a few months along but now she was showing which caused Jolly to not stop wearing that bright smile. He was beyond proud of the family he created.

Faye and Matt were in the middle of the made-up dance floor as she rambled on about all the little ideas she loved about the wedding and how she wanted their wedding to go. Matt listened intently without saying a word, simply watching his fiancé with adoration in his eyes.

Tay was sitting with Dove, both of them giggling about something, while Jesse watched from a distance. He’d been planning things all evening in his head, mapping out his life and it was evident in the way his heart lurched in his throat when Tay continued to laugh that he was feeling an emotion that was new for him. Closing the distance between them, Jesse extended a hand towards Tay, who titled his head at him.

“May I have this dance?” He asked as Repay by The Plot In You began playing through the speakers.

Tay glanced over to Dove, feeling bad it was interrupting their conversation but the brunette waved her off. “If you don’t dance with your man, I’ll push you into him.”

Once Tay was finally in Jesse’s embrace, they began to slowly move about the yard and he brushed his forehead against hers.

“I love you,” he proclaimed for the first time.

Tay’s eyes widened and leaned away from Jesse to get a good look in those chocolate boba eyes. “What?”

He cupped her cheek to lay a small yet forceful kiss to her lips. “I love you so much, darlin. It’s fine if you don’t feel the same, I just needed to-.”

“I love you too. So fucking much, Jesse. I’ve realized it for a while but was so afraid you wouldn’t feel the same yet.”

As new love blossomed, new beginnings were starting for Michael and Lori as they sat in front of the bonfire as they divulged about themselves to each other. Bryan and Davis offered to take Older Noah back to the hotel and were booking rooms for everyone else because for the first time in a week since they first arrived, Noah and Y/N would be alone.

“I have a surprise for you,” Y/N whispered in Noah’s ear as she continued to sit on his lap.

“You do?” His brows peaked as his cock twitched underneath her.

She said nothing, simply pressed a kiss to his cheek before sauntering into the house.

READER

I shook out the nerves from my hands as I stared at myself in the bathroom mirror. The white lace stood out against my complexion and I double checked to make sure my breasts were pressed up perfectly. Turning to the side slightly, I peaked at my ass that was barely covered by the end of the lingerie. When I found it in the store a few weeks ago, I knew immediately I had to buy it from the angel wings alone.

I never wore anything like this for Noah before which is why I was extremely nervous. While our sex life was extraordinary, I was still very unsure on how he felt about me dressing up in something like this.

“Stop being a pussy!” I pointed at my reflection. “You’re hot. You married THE Noah Sebastian!”

I quickly shook my head. “No, he married THE Y/N L/N, well now Sebastian. But that’s beside the point. You are going to bring this man to his knees. He loves you and would fuck you even if you wore a potato sack.”

Realizing I was still rambling to myself, I shook my head and quickly spritzed myself with my perfume; Noah’s new favorite of mine that smelled like peaches. Fluffing out my hair, I gave my reflection a curt nod before flipping off the lights and stepping out of the bathroom. The house was quiet, only the floor creaking beneath my feet as I crossed the hallway into the bedroom Noah and I dubbed ours. We decided to make my dads bedroom the new office, the old office our bedroom, and still keep the guest room the same.

As I walked into the bedroom, I saw Noah sitting on the end of the bed with his gaze down on the floor between his feet. He’d changed out of his wedding attire and wore only a pair of red briefs. His shoulders rose and fell with each deep breath as his hair dangled in his face but made no effort to brush it away. When he played with the new black band around his ring finger, I took in the sight of the new tattoo on the inside of his wrist, the same one I had.

Worthy.

Clearing my throat, I stood a few inches in front of Noah with my hands behind my back, trying hard not to knock into the ends of the angel wings. His head snapped up from the floor and when they landed on my form, his pupils bled darkness.

“Uh, do you like it?” I shifted on my feet, waiting for his answer.

Noah was still silent, only keeping his eyes on my breasts that were barely hidden underneath the white lace. He made no move towards me which made me start to second guess this idea.

“This was stupid,” I muttered before turning on my heels.

A hand shot out to grasp my hand, halting me, and when I glanced back I saw Noah staring up at me.

“You’re a literal fucking angel,” he mused before yanking me down to his lap.

The head of his cock pressed against the thin material of his briefs and I bit back a moan when I felt it brush along my core.

“My angel,” Noah praised while fingering the end of the wings. “Keep these on.”

I raised a brow at him while brushing away the hair from his face. “The wings doing it for you, Mochi? Do you want to chase me through the woods while you wear your mask and fuck me with them on?”

“Don’t tempt me,” he groaned while dragging his teeth over my collar bone.

With his hands on my hips, Noah guided me along his cock as I let my head fall back in bliss. I’d been wound up all week due to us deciding not to be sexual with each other and knew that if he even breathed on my clit, I would orgasm.

I gently pushed him away from me to lay him down on the bed while I fell to my knees between his legs.

“Oh fuck,” Noah ground out while letting his head fall to the bed as I dragged his briefs down the length of his thick legs.

My lips parted over the leaking head of his cock with my fingers wrapping around the base. I hummed in pure delight as the salty taste lingered on my lips when I sank my mouth down on him.

"So good," I praised looking up at him through my lashes

He groaned with pleasure as I took my time with him. I wanted to savor the way he always tasted.

"Angel," Noah warned. “Please. I need you."

I popped off of him and wiped away the drool from my chin as I rose to my feet slowly. "Is Noah Sebastian begging?"

“For my wife? Yes I am.”

"Well, who am I to make you wait," I straddled his hips once again.

Neither of us wanted to wait any longer so he undone the buttons of the lingerie teddy to expose my bare cunt to his awaiting cock. His eyes snapped up to me for a moment so I gave him a nod right before he guided himself past my wetness, the thickness of his cock filling me completely. It pulsed inside of me, earning a desperate groan.

Noah's eyes fluttered shut as his lips parted, his hands gripping my hips so tight I was sure there would be bruises in the morning. But I didn't care. Having him finally inside of me felt so fucking good.

Having my husband inside of me made my soul come alive.

I rocked my hips against him with my swollen clit rubbing against his warm stomach and I shivered at the sensation, the coil in my stomach pulling taut. Noah’s eyes jumped to the silver chain around my neck and gripped it with force to pull my lips down to his, devouring me

“Mine,” Noah demanded while fucking up into me.

I let out a silent yell when he hit the spot that made my spine ignite but the chain tightened around my throat, nearly cutting off my airway.

“Say it,” he panted. “Say your mine, Y/N.”

“I’m yours, Noah. Forever yours.”

He attacked my lips with so much force I had to rest a hand on his chest, our tongues exploring each other's mouths in a kiss so vicious it made my head spin. Noah's hips finally moved in a slow, steady stroke, and I whined into the kiss.

"More," I mumbled into his lips.

"Fuck, angel." He groaned. "It's too good."

I cupped his face to look at him. "Cum for me, Noah. Fill me up, please. I need you to cum with me.”

That's all he needed before his arms wrapped around my back, nearly crushing the angel wings, pulling me closer to his chest as his hips snapped up into me in violent strokes, the head of his cock hitting that perfect spot. I yelled out my pleasure, exposing my neck to Noah who immediately attacked it with his teeth leaving bite marks all along it.

My body hummed in a prayer-like awaking, the flames and heat burning high in my belly as my organs crested higher; so fucking high I was afraid I would combust into nothing but a matter of air. His name fell from my lips in devotion, a woman praying to her husband, and my toes curled when I finally came apart, Noah slowly falling behind me.

THIRD PERSON POV

As Y/N and Noah lay together in a mess of tangled limbs, both coming down from their shared high, he let the sounds of her deep breathing ease him into his own slumber. Her discarded lingerie and wings lay scattered on the ground and Noah made a mental note of asking Y/N on how she felt about hanging them up in their home.

He couldn’t stop watching her sleep with a smile that no one could erase. She was his. Finally Y/N was his wife and he would do whatever he could to make her happy.

Long fingers dragged up and down the snake tattoo on her back, almost like how he had the night they first lay together. The long day was coming to an end, the new chapter of their lives began tomorrow, which caused Noah to sweat all over because he couldn’t help but let the anxious thoughts creep in.

Take a breath, Noah. It’s okay.

Doing just that, he eased into the warmth Y/N proved and rested a hand on her stomach, finally letting himself succumb to the darkness.

“Love you, mochi,” she mumbled into the skin of his chest.

He kissed her forehead. “Love you more, angel.”

The rain that surrounded them in the beginning was no longer something that drowned them. It couldn’t rain all the time. Their love was forever unbroken. It created lines upon lines of memories, some old and some new. It brought about friendships that tied together as one family. All because of a miracle that had yet to present itself. They were no longer afraid of the wars that were waged against their sins. They weren’t okay in the beginning but their love proved that they no longer had to pretend. They waited each other out and Y/N would forever stay until morning.

All because they both were worthy.

#tina talks #bad omens #noah sebastian #just pretend noah sebastian #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian fanfiction #noah sebastian fics #noah sebastian smut #noah sebastian fluff

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stealingyourbones · 2 years ago

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*slowly shuffles a wooden box of finger bones towards you* so I have two ideas for you

So, what if ghosts like, really screw with video technology, so it all kind of looks corrupted at all times- so when Danny starts recording like a blog of daily like in amity park (maybe as a way to cope with Trauma) and he posts it, maybe people outside of amity could think it’s all just like, an ARG or analog horror- if you want to go with dc/dp here, tim could be trying to solve a nonexistent mystery

For idea two, do you know ab the mystery flesh pit? If you don’t it’s basically an unreality where a gigantic super organism is turned into a National park and it’s then shit down when the organism basically coughs in its sleep and destroys a lot of stuff-( also be warned, there is a lot of body horror involved in this, so if anyone’s sensitive to it maybe don’t look at any content!) so maybe Giant Danny is taking a nap and some villains find the GIANT GHOST TAKING A SLEEP and decide to hook him up to be used as like, a battery or Lazerus pit (if you go the route of his blood being lazerus water) and the heroes get involved trying to figure out what’s happening

oh man that would be so fun. Danny just takes a little school project 10 minute documentary of the town and doesn't think too much of it when he submits it to Youtube so he can send it to his teacher.

A week later and every ARG/Analog Horror nerd on the planet has heard about this brilliantly well produced video called "Amity Park"

Now knowing this, He decides to have some fun. He takes ominous shots of mundane Amity life and splices them between the more normal scenes of himself and his friends having fun and hanging out.

He amps up the uncanny level. Throughout all of his videos, he starts to tell a slightly dramatized version of his life, not the Phantom stuff, but his life as a Fenton.

The whole world watches in awe and delight as this refreshingly new Analog Horror channel posts nearly twice a week with some of the most stunning CGI that they've ever seen. I mean 'c'mon, Sentient food. A child living in the house of two mad scientists who casually mention dismembering and destroying ghosts at the dinner table. An honest to god crazy scientist lab with a massive portal to this 'Ghost Zone' just in their basement?! Yeah, whoever made this has an absolutely incredible imagination. (Some people are even dissing it since this GZ really just feels like a warped version of The Backrooms but it's fine, it's unique enough that it makes up for it.)

------

I am a hoe for any and every topic that Wendigoon talks about in his videos so I very much so know about the Mystery Flesh Pit. (Video is linked but be warned; Benji isn't joking when they say that it's a LOT of body horror.)

I'd like to propose that Danny isn't even on earth, he's on a different planet that has collected his blood and harnessed his core for energy on a massive scale, helping create and produce items that benefit their world greatly.

To Danny, Their mining, harvesting, and energy draining efforts are the equivalent to bacteria moving around his body. He's so massive that this civilization isnt impacting him in the slightest.

The JL get called because this strange planet superorganism is now moving and it's causing the destruction of an entire civilization.

They fly over to the planet and they notice something very very wrong with the shape of the planet.

First and foremost, the two eyes spanning the equivalent width of Texas that stares up at their ship is new.

#sorry if this makes no sense yall im so tired #danny phantom #dp x dc #dc comics #writing prompts #dpxdc #dp x dc prompt #bones replies #benjis-art-and-reblogs #homie i could kiss you ty for somehow mentioning my favorite ARG/funky worldbuilding work of all time

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futurecorps3 · 1 year ago

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imagine no war!!! remus after hogwarts decides to go to university, meets a muggle and falls head over heels but doesn't think he's good enough for her (w his condition on top of being a wizard and poor) but he brings her to meet the marauders anyway because they keep asking to meet the person he won't shut up about, maybe harry's birthday or just a pub outing or whatever??? he's nervous she'll fancy sirius but it's quite clear to everyone the second they meet that she clearly only has heart eyes for remus and the gang are like are you insane she's CLEARLY smitten with you and it literally takes everyone he knows to point it out for him to think he might even have a chance but is still floored when she's like "remus, i adore you, i've adored you from the moment we met" bc goddammit he deserves to be loved like that!!!

𝐈𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞

Masterlist<3

Summary: The request sums it up, read it hoe Pairing: Remus Lupin x reader Warnings: Alcohol consumption and that's all I can think abt hehe Word Count: 4.5K (i'm sorry) Requested: Yes

A/N: I'm absolutely sobbing. This is so cute!!! I'm using the Reggie was a spy for the order wild card and roll with that. Tysm for this awesome idea, nonnie! And sorry it took so long.

Remus knew magic existed, the type of magic that opens doors, gives you luck or disarms someone. But until he met her, he didn't know there was a type of magic that could be contained in someone's eyes, someone's smile, or even in that little quirk she had of squinting every time she focused.

Y/N Y/L/N. Even her name felt like the sweetest honey when it rolled off your tongue and into the air, he figured. She was a new kind of magic and Remus was hooked from the get go. They had met on a rather peculiar set of circumstances. When Moony first got to college, he had no friends or anyone nearby to help him cope with the abrupt transition. The boys visited as much as they could, but it'd be for about an hour or two before they had to go back to the ministry.

So, as he did when he arrived at Hogwarts, Remus found solace in reading and taking his wolfsbane at appropriate times. He was doing a classics mayor and reading the Plato classics was a convenient way to kill time while doing something productive. The boy spent hours in the library, sitting on the couches or getting some annotations done on the desks; he'd be done with the school's classics collection before the semester was over if he kept that pace.

He would have if he hadn't found those notes. Remus first noticed them in a worn copy of a compilation from a specific period of Plato's scripts, the third page in Philebus. "Socrates is being very reductive. I don't like it. Out of character, I do declare" written in red ink, cursive letters delicate in the ripped white paper.

He giggled at that, his thoughts exactly. Moony picked the piece of paper and examined it to see if it had any indications of who might've written it, but he found nothing. He only knew that the person who wrote it had a ruined red pen; the stains of ink sitting messily on the opposite side of the annotation. Remus was a sucker for mystery stories and he viewed this as an opportunity of having one of his own!

A short-lived one, since he cracked the case when a pretty girl on his history of philosophy class asked around for a red pen. Remus frantically but quietly rummaged through his satchel and found one just in time.

He rushed to her, offering it out “Here” he smiled, looking down at her as she looked up at him. “Thanks… Remus isn’t it? I don’t think I’ve had the pleasure. Y/N Y/L/N”. Y/N introduced herself, offering her hand out. Stained in red. The boy stared shocked at the realization this was the person he’d been looking for.

“Oh shit m’sorry, it looks like I committed a murder or something. My pen started leaking yesterday while I was studying in the library” She laughed and Remus swore he’d faint if he hadn’t gripped her hand. “Actually…” Remus started, searching in his pocket for the piece of paper he kept, when he finally found it, he showed it to her and a smile broke on those pretty lips.

“…I hope you don’t mind! I-I kept it. Been looking for you, it made me laugh” He admitted, handing it to her “You found me then! And, you’re very much welcome to keep it, Remus” Y/N grinned and Remus mirrored her expression sweetly. They met for coffee the next day. The day after that, they studied together. And the week after, they shared lunch.

About two months after they talked for the first time, they had gone on a date every single week. From museum outings to walks around campus if one of them didn't have much time. They also sat together in philosophy and, turns out, literature (which they realized they shared after).

Y/N gifted him a cool rock once, and he kissed her.

He kept the rock in his pocket ever since.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"Come on, mate, you gotta tell us who she is!" James exclaimed, his excitement palpable as he repeatedly patted the worn wooden bar in the cozy pub they had agreed to meet at. Remus chuckled and shook his head, a fond smile dancing on his lips as he took another sip of his whiskey.

"You've been talking non-stop about her since you two met! The last three times we've seen each other, it's been Y/N this, Y/N that. We've gotta meet the missus," Sirius playfully teased, giving Remus a light shove with his shoulder.

Rolling his eyes playfully, Remus glanced at his friends, grateful for their persistent curiosity but also hesitant to share too much. "Oh, Pads, don't call her that! We're not even official yet, and I doubt we'll ever be. She'll find someone, alright, but I'm just good old Remus," he replied, a hint of wistfulness shadowing his gaze.

It was true; good old Remus had learned how to stop caring about what other people thought of him, but that didn't mean he was entirely confident about who he was.

Navigating the Muggle world presented its own set of challenges for Remus. He knew that at some point, he would have to confront the whole "Hey, I'm a wizard, and there's this whole other world you don't know about, hope you don't mind!" situation with Y/N.

Then there were the lingering money issues that weighed on his mind. College was not cheap, but he had managed to secure a decent scholarship, which alleviated some of the burden. He hoped Y/N wouldn't care about his financial situation. And, of course, there was the delicate matter of revealing his true nature as a literal werewolf. How would she react when she found out?

Yeah.

He was good old Remus: poor Remus, monster Remus, scarred Remus, wizard Remus. If he were honest with himself, he was surprised they had made it past the first day, considering he had stupidly worn a short-sleeved t-shirt without anything to conceal the telltale signs of his condition.

But she noticed the perceptive and kind-hearted soul that she was, and she chose not to mention it. In that moment, Remus couldn't help but imagine the possibilities, but he also knew that reality had a way of reminding him of his limitations. Moony knew he would never be able to claim her as his own. Not in this lifetime, not in the next.

For now, he chose to cherish the moments they shared, basking in her laughter and marveling at the way her hair defied gravity with its radiant beauty. She was his bit of magic in a world that often seemed devoid of it. Deep down, however, he couldn't shake the nagging certainty that good things didn't last for boys like him—boys with tragedy coursing through their veins.

"Yeah, no. We're not doing this shit again," Sirius declared, shaking his head in disagreement. Remus's best friends had grown accustomed to his self-deprecating tendencies and were determined to lift his spirits. Remus might have been a mysterious figure to some, but to the Marauders, he was an open book, their brother.

"That's why she likes you, mate. You're good old amazing, lovely, smart, hot Remus!" James proclaimed with a boisterous cheer, pulling Remus into a tight embrace. "Tell you what, bring her to Harry's birthday party this weekend! I'm sure Lily won't mind," he suggested, his mischievous grin widening. Sirius enthusiastically chimed in, nodding in agreement. "Just ask her first and let me know, okay? I don't want Harry to have a bad time becaus-"

"Oh, Moons, the party is more for us than for him! He'll be out like a light by eight, and we'll get wasted like we always do," Prongs interjected, his infectious laughter filling the air, causing Remus to join in, his worries momentarily forgotten in the camaraderie of his friends.

There was no way out of this one, not that he sought an escape. Remus couldn't blame his best friends for their eagerness to meet Y/N. They knew him better than anyone, and they could see the spark of happiness she had ignited within him. Moony did little to hide his excitement, his heart fluttering with the hope that maybe, just maybe, things would work out.

Now, he just needed Lily's approval so he could gather the courage to ask the girl who had captivated his heart to accompany him to the birthday celebration—a step that held the promise of a new chapter in his life, one filled with both joy and uncertainty

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Remus nervously fiddled with the corner of his book, stealing glances at Y/N across the library. The soft rays of afternoon sunlight filtered through the stained glass windows, casting a warm, golden glow on the rows of ancient tomes and the elegant wooden shelves that lined the room. But in that moment, all Remus could see was Y/N, a radiant presence amidst the tranquil surroundings.

Summoning his courage, Remus took a deep breath and approached her table. The scent of old parchment mingled with the delicate fragrance of her perfume, creating an intoxicating blend that filled his senses. As he neared, he couldn't help but notice the way her eyes sparkled with intelligence and curiosity as she immersed herself in the world of words. Her hair cascaded down in gentle waves, its hue reminiscent of auburn leaves in autumn, and he found himself captivated by the way it framed her face, enhancing her natural beauty.

"Hey, love," Remus greeted her with a warm smile, trying his best to appear at ease. "Mind if I join you for a moment?"

Y/N looked up, a surprised yet welcoming expression crossing her features. Her eyes met Remus's, and a playful glimmer danced within their depths. She gestured to the seat across from her, her voice laced with gentle humor. "Well, if you insist. But only if you promise not to distract me from my riveting studies."

Remus chuckled, grateful for her light-hearted response. He took the offered seat, feeling a weight lift off his shoulders. "I'll do my best to behave, I promise," he replied, a twinkle in his own eyes. "But I do have something on my mind that I wanted to ask you."

Y/N raised an eyebrow. Her curiosity piqued. "Oh, really? Well, go on then. I'm all ears."

"There's a little someone's birthday coming up this weekend," Remus began, his voice filled with playful anticipation. "Harry, James' adorable son, is turning two years old. And, well, I was wondering if you'd like to come with me to the party."

Y/N's face lit up with a mixture of surprise and delight, her smile contagious. "Are you asking me to crash a toddler's birthday party? That sounds like a dangerous proposition," she teased, her tone lighthearted.

Remus laughed, his nerves easing with every moment of their easy banter. "Well, I can promise you that the party will be more entertaining than dangerous," he quipped, his eyes gleaming with mischief. "There'll be cake, balloons, and probably a fair amount of chaos. It's a chance to embrace your inner child if you want to look at it that way."

Y/N pretended to consider it, her finger tapping against her chin. "Hmm, cake, balloons, and chaos? You make a compelling case," she replied, a playful smile tugging at her lips. "How can I resist? Count me in, darling. I'd love to celebrate with you and your mates."

Remus couldn't contain his happiness, his relief flooding through him like a warm wave. "Brilliant!" he exclaimed, a genuine excitement coloring his voice. "I can't wait for you to meet everyone, t-they insisted I brought the girl I don't shut up about to the party"

Y/N smiled at that, holding Remus's hand over the table. "So you've talked to your friends about me?" "Oh shut it" He smiled, pressing a soft kiss to her lips. Right before those grey clouds of self deprecation repeating "this won't last" and "enjoy it before she realizes what you truly are" clouded his mind.

He shoved the thoughts away, holding to Y/N's smile against his lips as if it was an anchor saving him from drowning.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Bad idea. Bad idea. Bad idea.

He really did try to plan it all neatly. From what he'd wear to how he'd introduced her to his friends. Remus even asked them to keep the magic discreet since it was all too soon for that conversation, but for fuck's sake; it all got thrown out the window when he saw her in low waisted flared pants and his Bowie shirt. "H-hey!" He smiled, almost yelling, but she just laughed at his enthusiasm.

"Hi Rem," she sighed, leaving a kiss on the corner of his lips which she left lingering a bit too long. "Ready?" "As I'll ever be!". As Y/N and Remus walked hand in hand, the excitement in the air was palpable. However, beneath her playful demeanor, Y/N couldn't shake the nerves that fluttered in her stomach. Meeting Remus's best friends felt like stepping into a new world, and the fear of not fitting in or being accepted gnawed at her.

She stole a quick glance at Remus, hoping he wouldn't notice the physical manifestations of her anxiety. The last thing she wanted was to burden him with her own inner turmoil. But even as she tried to compose herself, her voice wavered slightly as she spoke.

"Remus, I can't deny that I'm feeling a bit... off," she admitted, her words stumbling over her nervousness. "My heart feels like it's racing a marathon, and there's this knot in my stomach that just won't loosen. I hope it's not too obvious." Remus turned his head towards her, a reassuring smile playing on his lips. His eyes sparkled with warmth and understanding.

"Hey, I get it," he said, his tone comforting. "Meeting new people can be nerve-wracking, and our bodies have interesting ways of letting us know. But you know what? You're doing great, sweetheart, and I'm here with you. We'll take it one step at a time, and I promise we'll have a good time together. So, let's embrace the adventure, nerves and all, and see what the night has in store for us, okay?"

Y/N nodded thankfully, the knot loosening up a little. “Thanks baby”. The world stopped in Remus’ perspective at the pet name but he just nodded and kissed her cheek. He helped. He was a warm blanket after a long day even when moments like those weren’t happening. Comfort.

They eventually got to James’ place; the loud music coming from the two floor house making Y/N feel even more at ease. It radiated a warm, welcoming energy even before stepping in. Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad.

“Deep breath”. They both took a breath before approaching the door and knocking, the wine Remus’ plus one brought close to breaking with the force she was holding it with. A bright smile opened the door, hugging Remus immediately. “You have no idea how happy I am you’re here Moony”.

Y/N smiled sweetly at the nickname the boy had for his best mate. She didn’t know where it came from but James seemed to be the sun reflecting on the moon. On Moony. The girl knew Remus’ light was enough to outshine the sun itself, but the comparison seemed cute.

“You must be Y/N! He can’t shut up about you. Can I hug you? It’s okay if not, Sirius says I need to ask before hugging people but I just love it so much I cannot help myself” He rambled, making her giggle as she uttered a small ‘It’s okay’ and hugged the boy. She noticed Remus staring and just winked at him. “Is that cake I smell?” Y/N grinned, peeking inside before James stepped aside to let them both in.

“Yes, come inside! My wife, Lily, has just finished baking her chocolate cake recipe. It’s bloody brilliant! Harry’s favorite in his short lived culinary experience. You gotta meet him too!” Moony stayed behind, cherishing the way James’ warm welcome made Y/N feel a little more comfortable; her shoulders relaxed as well as her grip on the wine bottle.

He stepped in, hanging his coat on the rack he helped Lily choose when his best friends bought the house. Rapid steps came running down the stairs, and before he turned around, the smell of cigarettes and leather filled his nostrils. “Hello Pads” he smirked, hugging his friend tightly.

“Hey Moons! Did the missus come?” “Yes, she’s outside with James and Lily-“. He was cut short when his best friend, (his eyeliner wearing, muscled, rocker, tattooed, charming best friend) ran all the way into the garden to greet the girl. He was head over heels over.

A new feeling settled into his chest. An unpleasant one. Sirius was a dream. Remus was just good old Remus. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! He sighed heavily, ran a hand through his hair, and then covered his mouth. Y/N was not one to be too forward, but the way Sirius looked and acted could easily make her reconsider.

It got worse when he heard her loud laugh coming from the garden, followed by a chuckle that unmistakably came from Sirius. His best friend would never do it on purpose, but then again, his charm was never used on purpose. It just sort of happened. Remus sighed and walked outside to find the girl saying hi to Harry.

The toddler had his tiny hand wrapped around the girl's fingers, babbling incoherencies, as Y/N had a full conversation with him. "Are you sure?" she asked and Harry answered nonsense as the girl nodded back. She looked up at Remus coming through the sliding door. "Remus, he's the cutest thing I've ever seen!".

He laughed and walked over to her. The girl immediately wrapped her hands around his arm and hugged him tightly. James winked at Moony and went inside as the conversation ensued, Sirius teasing Remus about the girl he "brought home".

Soon, Y/N was well adapted to their friend's sense of humour and was joking around with Lily about how dumb they could all be. Despite Y/N's worries, it all went by smoothly. The one he got along with the most was James; he loved asking questions, and she loved answering them.

Remus had always loved her laugh; Seeing his best friends being the cause of it made it even better. "I'm telling you, he's insane!" Sirius laughed, bouncing his leg up and down as Harry sat on his lap giggling. "He's an absolute sweetheart" Y/N answered, kissing Remus' cheek as his best friends tried putting dirt (rightfully deserved dirt) on his name.

"Wait until you know him just a tiny bit better. You'll get to see his menacing self... got us in a shit ton of trouble back in school" James chuckled, making Remus roll his eyes and trying to divert her attention by asking if she wanted a bit more cake.

During their evening, Y/N kept a tight grasp on Remus’ hand while smiling at his friend’s jokes. When it was his turn to laugh, Sirius noticed how the girl looked intently over at Remus with a grin on her face. His eyes looked gorgeous in the sun with those little wrinkles when he giggled, she thought.

In that moment, she realized she wanted Remus to say her name as you’re supposed to say it; sleepily, with a mouth full of food, between laughters and in tears. Y/N saw the specks of brown in the amber colored lake that his eyes were and fell completely. Sirius saw it, James saw it, Lily saw it.

Even more when he turned to look down at her and wipe a bit of chocolate off her cheek, and she kept that look of utter adoration for him. “He’s gone” Lily mumbled to her husband. “She’s too” he agreed. Sirius smirked, getting up to get Harry to bed as he fell asleep on his uncle’s arms as the sun set.

James and Sirius were at the center of attention, regaling the group with a hilarious story from their time at school. Their voices were animated, and they gesticulated with enthusiasm, drawing everyone into their tale. Remus stood nearby, a mix of amusement and mild embarrassment evident on his face.

"And then, there was this one time at Hogwarts," James began, a mischievous glint in his eyes, "when we decided to prank the entire Slytherin common room! We turned all their robes into neon pink ones!"

Sirius chimed in, laughter bubbling in his voice. "Oh, it was epic! They all looked like walking flamingos! The look on their faces was priceless!"

Y/N was thoroughly entertained by the story, but she couldn't help but notice Remus's subtle blush. She leaned closer to him and whispered teasingly, "Remus, were you part of this grand pink robe conspiracy too?"

Remus grinned, shaking his head. "I plead the fifth," he replied, trying to hide his amusement. "Let's just say those were wild times, and I may or may not have been an innocent bystander."

Y/N laughed, enjoying the playful banter. She was captivated by the camaraderie and genuine friendship between the group. As the evening continued, she found herself drawn into more anecdotes and laughter, feeling a sense of warmth and acceptance in their company.

Remus's friends made her feel welcome and included, and she couldn't help but feel grateful for being a part of this close-knit circle, even if she didn't know the full extent of their world. The nerves that had accompanied her earlier had transformed into excitement and a genuine desire to create new memories with Remus and his friends.

The feeling was reciprocated. Remus felt, and not on mere theory; the moment Y/N excused herself to go to the bathroom, his best friends started gushing to him about the girl. "Moony, she's in love" Sirius said between incredulous and joyous laugh "Oh Pad-" "Mate, I'm telling you... she looks at you like you hung the bloody stars!" now said James, Lily nodding pridefully "She looks at you just how James looked at me back in the day".

And Merlin did he want to believe them! He truly, really did. But instead, there was this empty feeling on his chest. There was no way Y/N Y/L/N looked at him in the way James looked at Lily; Almost scared of the joy she brought to him, like that pain in his heart would end up killing him and he'd quite literally die a happy man. So, when Remus dropped her off at her flat and turned his head before she'd kiss him on the mouth, the void went deeper.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Y/N couldn't sleep that night. Her mind was restless, thoughts of Remus swirling in her head like a tempest. She tossed and turned, replaying the events of the evening over and over again, each memory etching itself into her heart. There was no denying it anymore; she was utterly and completely in love with him.

The realization hit her like a wave crashing onto the shore, powerful and unstoppable; she was head over heels for Remus Lupin.

The next day, Y/N couldn't concentrate on anything. Her mind kept drifting back to Remus, like she'd could easily find herself absentmindedly doodling hearts and his name on the margins of her notebook. She needed to tell him; she couldn't keep this to herself any longer.

In the late afternoon, she gathered her courage and dialed his number, her heart pounding in her chest as she waited for him to pick up. When he finally answered, his warm voice on the other end sent shivers down her spine.

"Hey, Remus," she began, trying to sound casual despite the turmoil inside her. "I was wondering if we could meet up later? There's something I want to talk to you about." Remus's response was filled with concern. "Of course, love. Is everything alright?" "Yes, everything's fine," she reassured him. "I just... I have something to tell you, something important."

He agreed to meet at their favorite cafe later that evening, and Y/N's heart fluttered with nervous excitement. The minutes leading up to their meeting felt like an eternity, but finally, the time came. When they sat down together, Y/N took a deep breath, trying to steady her racing heart. Remus looked at her with those caring, gentle eyes, and she felt a rush of emotions wash over her.

"Remus," she began, her voice trembling slightly. "I don't even know where to start. Y-you've brought so much magic into my life. From the moment we met, I felt something special, something I couldn't quite put into words."

He listened intently, his gaze never leaving hers.

"I've never felt this way before," she continued, her cheeks flushing with emotion. "You're like a beautiful enigma, a captivating mystery that I can't get enough of. You make me laugh, you make me feel safe and cherished, and every moment with you is a treasure. You've shown me a kind of magic that I never knew existed, a magic that exists in the little things, the stolen glances, the shared laughter, and the way you hold my hand. It's like you've cast a spell on me, and I never want it to end."

Remus's eyes softened, and a tender smile graced his lips. "Y/N, you're the most incredible person I've ever met," he replied, his voice filled with emotion. "From the moment I saw your ink-stained hands, I knew you were something special. You've brought light into my life, and I can't believe that someone as amazing as you could feel this way about me."

He reached across the table and took her hand in his, their fingers interlocking like two puzzle pieces, finding their perfect fit.

"I'm not good with grand gestures or flowery words," he said, his voice a whisper. "But I can tell you this: I care about you deeply, more than I ever thought possible. You make me happy like I never imagined I'd could feel. I've fallen in love with you, Y/N, and I can't believe my luck."

Y/N's heart soared, tiny tears of joy welling up in her eyes. "Oh, Remus," she murmured, her voice choked with emotion. "I'm so in love with you too. You've shown me a kind of love I never knew existed, a love that feels like coming home. I cherish every moment with you, and I want to share my time with you, if you'll have me."

Without hesitation, Remus leaned across the table, closing the distance between them, and pressed a soft, tender kiss to her lips. It was a kiss filled with love and promise, sealing their feelings and intentions.

"I'd be honored to have you in my life, Y/N," he whispered against her lips. "You're my bit of magic in a world that can be harsh and uncertain, and I never want to let you go."

And so, in that cozy cafe, two souls found solace in each other's love. The world around them faded into the background as they basked in the enchantment of their newfound love, knowing that this kind of magic was unlike any other they had ever known. They had found something truly extraordinary in each other, a love that would stand the test of time and shine brighter than any star in the night sky.

˚ · • . ° .

It’s currently 12am and my brain isn’t working so i’ll just post this and place the word count in the morning.

Remember, the best way to support writer’s works on here is by REBLOGGING WITH TAGS. I’d very much appreciate it if you did!

Thanks again, stranger. Hope you have a nice day<3

NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO REPOST AS THEIR OWN/TRANSLATE/OR COPY MY WORK IN ANY PLATFORM OR SPACE WITHOUT MY EXPLICIT CONSENT.

#remus lupin oneshot #remus lupin #remus lupin x you #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin one shot #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin smut #marauders era #the marauders era #the marauders #marauders fluff #marauders imagine #young!remus lupin x reader #remus x reader #harry potter marauders #marauders x reader

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am3li420 · 7 months ago

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Remus Lupin head canons i’ve been collecting for 10+ years

- this hoe loves books, i know that’s a common head canon but let me dive deeper;

- he definitely is checking out matilda level amounts of books from the library every week before going to hogwarts.

- homeschooled by his mother 100% and she would make him write book reports so he learned to love annotating books

- cut to lily seeing him writing in a book in 1st year and being absolutely disgusted but eager to make friends so she asks him his favorite books and authors.

- remus goes on like an hour long tangent about tolkien and c.s. lewis and how much he loves fantasy and how he’s so excited he gets to be at hogwarts because it’s so close to his escape from his lycanthropy as a child.

- lily tells him all about literature and they start a book club right then and there.

- remus also studied piano from his mom as well, and then eventually when she couldn’t teach him anymore his parents saved up to pay for a teacher.

- he loves his piano teacher and over summer breaks goes back and takes lessons

- bonds with sirius because of this as sirius had to learn violin to become a “well rounded heir”. they play duet covers as entertainment for gryffindor parties and everyone fucking loves it.

- eventually mary joins in and plays guitar and they have a cute little peter paul and mary vibe going on.

- remus is so outspoken, and truly always the first to be informed on politics or news

- was very forthcoming on his views about the war, along with james and sirius. i believe remus was the most “radical” of them though, and wanted freedom/ equality for all creatures not just wizards.

- he also felt unease at the ministry and wanted systematic changes as well as wanting to fight against voldemort.

- extremely distrustful of dumbledoor towards the end of the war, and it caused division between him and sirius until the second war when sirius realized remus had been right.

- remus had a magical proclivity for defense, and was a great dueler. the only person who he was evenly matched with in his class was sirius. they often fought to draws. they absolutely keep count of their wins.

- remus, lily, and mary all collectively give james and sirius their music tastes. they have new records every time they come home from break.

- remus is absolutely a stoner and loves smoking joints, reading, and listening to music during his free time.

- him and sirius smoke together sometimes but remus smokes a lot more than sirius because it really helps him with his chronic pain and depression.

- oh remus rolling a joint is like the most sexy thing anyone has ever seen. sirius frequently uses those memories for….personal time.

- remus uses an expansion charm under his bed and grows his own weed, eventually becomes hogwarts resident dealer and always puts freebies in his deliveries

- the freebies include:

- little drawings made by sirius

- chcocolates

- sometimes if he’s hanging out with marlene and has to deliver an order she’ll draw a tarot card for the person and write down a little reading for them!

- remus’ own handmade stickers!

- yeah he’s everyone’s favorite drug dealer seriously 10/10.

- he operates this all under minnie’s nose and is forever smug about getting away with it.

- i could probably think of a million more because i just love him so much but ive been hitting my pen while writing this so i’m gonna go make a snack!!!

#remus lupin #headcanon #head canon #remus lupin headcanons #wolfstar #wolfstar headcanons #marauders #marauders era #marauders era headcanons #lily evans #sirius black #james potter #marlene mckinnon #mary macdonald

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buckets-and-trees · 1 year ago

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Warm Shadows - Let All Light Go (2/4)

Collection: Warm Shadows Characters/Pairings: Alpha!Steve x f!Omega!Reader, existing Alpha!Bucky x f!Omega!Reader Word Count: 7.5k Summary: Now that he's claimed you, Captain Hydra takes you back to his new base of operations, his little omega bait for the Soldat. But the bond between an alpha and an omega is a powerful thing that shouldn't be trifled with. [sequel to When You Fall On Me Like Night]

Content Warnings: DARK, a/b/o dynamics, explicit smut, DUBIOUS CONSENT/omega heat, oral - female receiving, vaginal fingering, breast play, vaginal intercourse

Logistical Notes: We've got a dose of pride for @nickfowlerrr's Seven Deadly Sins + Seven Holy Virtues writing event. Now this second part is too late for the Horror Movie Hoe-a-thon, but I had most of it written before the challenge closed, and so I had plucked another dialogue prompt from her list, so I still want to give @witchywithwhiskey credit where it's due, and you'll find the prompt in bold and italics when it appears.

Additional Notes: I had no intention of making this three times as long as the original, but Steve had other plans. So many other plans. Thanks to @biteofcherry for letting me suss out a couple of the things I had questions on plot-wise. Title from Hozier's De Selby (Part 2).

↠ Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest

Steve doesn’t smile anymore. He hasn’t smiled in weeks. And yet the frown on his face is more than the non-smile stoicism that had taken over his demeanor since the ambush outside of Turin. He exhales deeply, washing away the frown as he straps your limp body into the jump seat of the stealth jet. Unconscious and sedated, your head falls forward though your torso is held back by the chest harness of the safety belt. Steve angles your head back against the headrest because if you got a crick in your neck, it will be a problem he doesn’t want to hear you try and complain about later.

He had achieved his objective in coming to Wakanda. Though the operation had played out with slight differences from what he had anticipated, it had gone as close as he could have logically projected in almost every aspect. He knew Bucky. No. The Winter soldier, he corrects. And he knew you. As players in this piece of the plan, you had both been reliably predictable.

As a super soldier Steve knew the strengths, the weaknesses, the limitations, and what Barnes would be susceptible to. That’s why he had been so prepared in laying his trap and incapacitating the asset.

Overpowering you had been easy.

Claiming you had split a slow but building tremor to his system. It had changed what he’d intended to do.

A few hours later as he approaches the remote Hydra base, that disconcerting feeling in his brain that he is working to tamp down still smolders with something unsettled that makes him flick his eyes up to the mirror that allows the pilot to check the interior behind him to see that you’re still in the same state of sedation.

His new conditioning will help him to control this irritating itch.

After touching down and rolling into the hangar, Steve unbuckles you from the seat and slings your unconscious body over his shoulder. He doesn’t stop walking but proceeds to give his brief mission report to the ranking officer on base who was waiting to meet him at the base of the small jet’s cargo ramp as he exits. This man is not his handler but his liaison for the time being. He’s competent enough that Steve if rarely frustrated with him. The power dynamics are something Steve is constantly aware of. Hydra wants to know they are in control and yet learned with the Winter Soldier that an asset stripped of complete autonomy was more inflexible to work with – and impossible to pull back when he broke free. They don’t want to make the same mistake with him, but they give him no illusion over who his allegiance is to now. It’s not a leash, but an unmistakable tether that they will let him tenuously control as long as he ultimately complies.

It's why he has tolerable and private living quarters where he deposits you on top the large bed. He leaves a bottle of water next to you and then leaves. The door to his quarters is controlled by a fingerprint recognition, allowing Steve a fair amount of control over who can come in and out, and he has no intention of giving you access.

He goes to the mess to get food. No one approaches him while he eats. He collects two of the meal boxes that are ready to go – one marked for lunch, one marked for dinner – and brings them back for you.

You’re still asleep when he returns. He takes the time to order routine meal delivery to his quarters for you long term as well as a supply of standard issue clothes and laundry service. This base is a hub for research and development, so the standard of living is functional and minimalistic, which suits him fine, and that is all you will require as his omega.

It's mid afternoon before you finally wake, and he can sense the moment you resume consciousness – his heightened senses heard the change in your breathing, but there’s also an innate sense about it. He wasn’t expecting that.

He shifts slightly where he sits in a boxy armchair reading over some new intelligence reports on his tablet to watch you. You slowly sit up causing the water bottle he set on the mattress next to you to roll against your body, and you frown, then look around and see him almost immediately. Fear and anger show immediately in your face, exactly as he expected.

“Your food is on the counter,” he says flatly.

“I don’t want it.”

“You will,” he responds.

You look away from him, scan the single-room quarters, and then look down to the water bottle again. He hears your small sigh before you pick it up, unscrew the top to take a few sips, then close it and shift to one side of the bed and lay back down, curling up, facing away from him. There’s an east-facing window on that side of the room.

None of this behavior is unexpected, and it’s of no matter to him. He has you here, he’s keeping you here as long as necessary. You’re hurt, you will hold onto your pride at the offense for a long while yet, and he expects it. He’s not offended. It will wear away.

He has a few projects he planned to touch base with various research and development teams on the base, and so now that he knows you’re alert and fine, he has no problem resuming his operations and routines.

The single declaration over the food is all you say to him for the first few days.

Not that he is there much either. He has missions, projects, agendas – his own and Hydra’s, and certainly doesn’t exist to coddle his omega.

An omega, he reminds himself.

There is only one bed, and he doesn’t say one word about it to you. The first night when he returns, you are curled in on yourself on the edge of the bed much as you had been earlier when he left (though he notes you had eaten the roll from the dinner box, so you had moved at some point). He wordlessly changes into his sleepwear and slides beneath the sheets. He figures if it bothers you enough, you can choose to sleep on the small couch or the floor, but he isn’t going to give up the bed to accommodate you.

On the third day, you rise when he does. The small bathroom is the only private part of the living quarters, so he is closed off from you while he showers, but as he eats breakfast and finishes the rest of his morning routine, you sit in the armchair, legs curled up, and watch him with a cool storm in your eyes.

When he returns on the fourth night, you smell different. You wear the same clothes, but you’ve clearly showered, and you must have done what you could to clean your clothes in the sink because you're wearing them and not the base-issued garments. You’re already curled up on your side of the bed, still on top of the bedding, barefoot, but not sleeping yet.

Your state of unrest is burdening his thoughts. It’s an imposition he can’t have.

The way you bleed into his consciousness was the only thing he had stupidly forgotten to even account for in this maneuver to draw out the Soldat. Part of it was because he hadn’t been entirely sure he could successfully make the claiming bond – he knew he could get the bite, but it had been a gamble on whether it would work.

It had.

Though it hadn’t been like a clap of lightning but more like an invisible string threaded between the two of you. He had used it to manipulate the situation that night, but the reality of it had also shifted what his original plan for you had been.

Having never bonded with an omega, he had heard varying reports of how the connections could develop between an alpha and an omega. Some said it was strong enough to reach a degree of non-verbal communication, but this seemed to be developing as more of a constant, pressing awareness as the string wove further through him as the days passed, but an awareness that he was learning to read and decipher.

That cool storm that brewed in your eyes any of the few times you looked at him had to be tamed. He didn’t expect it to go away, but he could not have the rage brewing, growing, and pulsing from you to him. He can’t afford the distraction.

In an operations meeting one of the analysts sits down to the table with two unnecessary books in the stack of things they’ve brought with them, and he remembers that you loved to read.

He deposits a linen tote bag with a stack of books on your bedside table that night, returning after you’re already asleep.

He leaves for a mission across the globe before you wake the next morning.

When he returns three days later, it’s mid-afternoon, and he goes to his quarters after the mission debriefing. You’re sitting almost comfortably on the couch with one of the books. You still regard him with cold, guarded eyes, but you’re wearing the base-issued clothing. It’s plain, utilitarian, slate grey.

He remains with you the rest of the evening, the two of you eating dinner together at the small table in one corner of the room when meals are delivered. You don’t look at him, and he doesn’t watch you too much. He thought he had been focused on the mission. He thinks now the focus had come easily again because you were less angry, an icy ache rather than the rampant and enflamed rage that was only further agitated without anything to do.

The next day is unremarkable with this new development. You read, you wear different clothes from the base again, and he is back to his standard on-base routine, returning to his quarters after dinner but before dark. It’s the same the day after, and then the day after that. The only thing that changes at the end of one more day, is that once you’re settled to sleep and he slides into bed a quarter of an hour later, he’s about to drop off to sleep when he hears you take a deep breath.

His own heart stills. What are you about to do?

“Can I have normal clothes?” you ask softly.

One request could lead to another request, and another.

But if they’re as simple as this, easy enough to appease, he could say yes until he needs to refuse you something he’s not willing to entertain.

“I’ll see it done.”

“Oh,” your response is small, surprised.

“Now sleep,” he says, not a command.

Mid-morning he has a break between consultations, and he pulls one of the base caretakers aside and charges them with accommodating your request.

He returns to you before dinner that night. He simply finished his work earlier than usual that day, it’s nothing more than that. You’re in jeans and a lightweight crewneck sweatshirt. Eating dinner is another quiet affair, but the easiest it’s been out of the few times you’ve shared any meals in this place.

Over the next week he eats breakfast with you and most of his dinners. There’s a sadness that’s growing, but he is also melting the glacier of your guarded hostility.

While eating dinner one evening, you ask, “Where are we?”

“A Hydra research and development facility.”

You give it another moment, and then you press further, “And where’s this facility located?”

He looks up at you across the table and gives a dark, wry smirk. “Europe.” His tone is clipped. He can see you know that’s the end of the information he’s going to give you on the matter.

“How are your books?” he ventures after a few minutes. He had gone to the bookshop in the town to purchase a second stock of books for you earlier in the week.

“I appreciate them,” you answer. Without looking back up at him, you say, “The old you liked to read.”

He glowers at you, but he can see there’s almost a warmth in your eyes. It does something to him, so he drops his eyes back to his plate.

He stands abruptly and takes his plate to the counter by the sink, then he leaves. He won’t entertain that line of conversation with you. He paces through the facility for an hour before he returns. When he sees you seem to have been waiting for him, there’s a small warmth in his chest. You just nod at him, and he nods in return. No more words are exchanged between you that night.

When you both finally retire to bed, he doesn’t say a word or give any sign of reacting to you pulling the covers back on your side of the bed for the first time in this space and climbing into them, he simply does the same on his side. You still stay rigidly still and curled up, nearly on the edge of the mattress, but it’s more than he ever expected from you. The nights following, you maintain this step forward in proximity.

He notices your hand going to your bonding mark from Bucky over the following days, and it happens more and more frequently. He almost says something, but as he scrutinizes your actions, he sees you do it without seeming to think about it. It bothers him, but when he sees it’s not intentional, it’s not jealousy or rage that eats at him, it’s something else.

Because why hasn’t the Soldat come for you yet?

That was the object of the game, after all.

He was sure he hadn’t underestimated the Soldat’s skills or Bucky’s devotion to you. Bucky had, in fact, been spotted close enough in the region that the whole base had been on red alert for three days, certain the Winter Soldier would strike, but he hadn’t. Then the reports were he’d gone further north and left Italy altogether, so the alert had gone down from red to orange, and now sat at yellow - standard caution and operating procedures.

It was bothering him further because you were supposed to be Bucky’s beloved omega. How could he abandon you this long? Work so carelessly? Soldat should be desperate and raising hell at this point.

Because at this point?

It’s why Steve decides to embark on one more mission. He doesn’t tell you where he is going. He didn’t tell you even that he is going. He could already feel your unease growing, the questions and uncertainty. He doesn’t need his omega further agitated.

His mission is quick and successful.

As he returns, there is a sudden spike of fear and adrenaline when he is about an hour out from the base. It burns through his system, and he hasn’t felt any emotions overpower him this strongly in weeks and weeks, but after less than a minute it’s snuffs out almost as quickly as it had flared.

Twenty minutes from landing, a call buzzes in over his comms.

“Captain, our base has been attacked, but we are clear from intruders and in active recovery mode now,” his liaison’s voice relays.

“Intruders?” he growls.

“Full report forthcoming and will be ready by the time you arrive. You are cleared for landing but divert to the machine storage facility rather than our standard hangar, we’ve sustained damage there. End communication.”

Steve slams his fist against the arm rest of the seat – the place he knew could sustain the brunt of his impatience – and it breaks off, smashed away completely.

His landing approach gives him a view of the obvious devastation to the base, the entire northwest quadrant still in flames, but with crews working quickly to extinguish the fire.

His liaison is waiting in a truck to drive from the storage on the outskirts back to the main base.

“Twenty-two casualties, six injured, two hundred on evacuation disbursement orders. Only beta essential personnel and the damage control teams remain, prime essential personnel were evacuated as soon as the intruder was reported.”

Steve frowns. “Identity?”

“Confirmed as the Soldat.”

Steve nods. “You said intruders when you contacted me on approach.”

“We’ve since confirmed it was the Winter Soldier and only him.”

He nods again. That news wasn’t surprising. Had he known I would be gone? He was certainly cutting it close, waiting until almost the eleventh hour to come for his omega.

“Status of the omega?”

“We sedated and moved the omega to our facility outside of Geneva.”

Steve’s entire chest seizes in rage – not only moving his omega without consulting him, but to sedate her without any thought? It doesn’t matter that it’s standard protocol for prisoners, you’re his omega. However, every alarm in his head rings immediately that he can not show any ripple of emotion or he may very well never see his omega again. He won’t make the same mistake again – not for a third time.

“Geneva will be the next center of operations for current projects?” he asks.

“Correct. Early calculations project that this base can be functional again in four to five months, and we’ll evaluate whether projects will move back, or continue in Geneva and other bases in the region and clear the way for new initiatives here. We thought you would want to see evidence and damages yourself here first, which is why I didn’t redirect you once we had entered the first recovery stages after clearing all immediate threats, Captain.”

“The logical call,” he agrees.

Four and a half hours later, he touches down in Geneva, but it’s another two hours before he can escape all the protocol and regrouping strategy conversations. Within ten minutes after that, he’s in the new living quarters assigned to him on the Swiss base.

And there you are. Haphazardly deposited on the bed, but there all the same. He lets out a breath as he closes the door behind him. It locks automatically. He drops his pack on the couch and then makes his way to you. He rights your body, laying you fully across the bed and straightening your limbs. He removes your shoes and tucks a pillow beneath your head. He could smell you immediately on entering the quarters, but handling your body now confirms you’re dangerously close to breaking into your heat a day earlier than you were supposed to. He has no doubt it’s due to the distress of the day. That spike of fear and adrenaline he felt earlier had to have been you moments before you were sedated for transport.

He examines your neck, but sees no evidence of an injection, which leaves sedation by inhalation. In a situation where they needed efficiency and couldn’t chance a miscalculation of precision, it was the logical move. It also narrows things down to one of two compounds currently in use for inhaled sedation, which he appreciates.

Then he sees the bloom of a bruise forming already on your arm just above the elbow, and his brow furrows. He will review the footage and he will find out who did this to you.

Satisfied in general over your state – even breathing and no other visible injuries – he turns his attention to the new living quarters. It’s still a studio set up, but moderately larger than the Turin facility. There he’d been assigned quarters for an individual, and this is clearly one of the units designed for Hydra personnel with a partner. A marked difference here is an area that is sectioned off as a study with a desk and a bookshelf. There are already some books there, but empty shelves that can be filled as well.

There’s a decently sized case on the table in the kitchenette area. Inside is a selection of personal effects transported here from Turin, likely collected after the initial evacuation of personnel, but delivered here in those first two hours while he was in the strategy meetings upon arrival. There are a few items of his clothing, a modest selection of the wardrobe he’d arranged for you, toiletries, and even your small accumulation of books.

He has just finished unpacking the case when he can sense you stirring on the bed. A moment later he feels the spike of unease and tension as you register the new surroundings, sitting up on the bed, but he’s already approaching you.

He can feel the diminution of your nerves when your eyes land on him, but he sees the initial wave of relief in your eyes that you also try and stamp away in an instant.

He sits cautiously but with no apology on the edge of the bed next to you.

“Where are we?”

“A new facility.”

Your eyes study him for a moment. He knows you’re assessing that his answer means he won’t give you details. “Still in Europe?”

He nods.

“How long since the former facility was compromised?” you ask.

He smirks. You were always intelligent – not that it would have been difficult to figure out, but he’s proud of how quickly your mind works.

You huff at his hesitation and roll your eyes. “If you think I’ll use the information to try and figure out where we might be, I don’t know where we started, so it won’t be of any use to me, I’m just hungry and want to know how much time I’ve lost.”

“It’s been somewhere between seven to eight hours.”

He reaches for his communications tablet and quickly orders a standard meal for each of you to be delivered as he hasn’t eaten much either.

“It was him, wasn’t it?” you break the silence again. ��Bucky found me.”

He hadn’t planned to tell you, but he won’t lie to you. “Yes”

“He’ll find me again. He said that wherever I went, he would find me.”

“Oh, I know.” His stare is back on you. “That’s the entire point. I need the Soldat.”

The silence that builds between you two is full of anger on your side. There’s nothing else for him to explain, but he’s curious to see how long you’ll keep this moment stretching on before ending it or saying something else.

But it grows more and more uncomfortable, and you try not to fidget. You’ve never been one to fidget, and certainly not over these past few weeks at any point around him. Then he notices the beads of perspiration gathering on your brow.

“Your heat, Omega.”

“My heat, not yours.”

“Sure,” he laughs cruelly. He reaches out to touch your cheek, somewhat patronizingly.

“Don’t touch me!” you snarl and snap your jaws at him, causing him to withdraw his hand immediately. “I don’t need you.”

“Fine.” He stands and retreats, not because he fears you in the slightest, but because he won’t fight your petulance, not when he has better things he can do at least for now. “Face your heat alone, Omega.”

He leaves, hearing you let out another impatient huff just as the door closes behind him.

He leaves you in pursuit of one of the data analysis rooms. If you’re going to be difficult and refuse him, he can do better things with his time until you’re ready to bend and keen for him. Once there, he logs into the system and pulls up the footage from Turin. He watches every frame of the Winter Soldier’s attack on the facility. It was shown earlier when he was meeting with the Hydra officers in debriefing the attack, but now he can study it alone in its entirety, moving from camera to camera outside, and then through each hallway and room without commentary from anyone else, able to slow down and rewind each moment as he sees fit.

It’s masterful.

And he looks directly at cameras after many of the kills. Twenty-two casualties and only six injuries? That’s intentional. He knows the Soldat could have executed this more quietly, and that’s evident in how he exits when he realizes you’ve been moved. From that point, his exit strategy has him engaging with almost no one, but setting fires and explosions, leaving enough damage in his wake to send his message.

It’s effective.

Steve narrows the block of time from the incident on the base and watches additional footage from the same ten-minute period. It’s every frame of the footage related to your acquisition, sedation, and transport from the base. He is interested in discovering just how the Soldat knew when to retreat, and he leaves notes in his log and in addition to drafting and sending a memo with some of his theories and observations to his primary liaison and a few of the officers on the taskforce. But his primary objective was to figure out who handled you so roughly, and he does. They will be dealt with later. He can’t expose such a personally driven need to deal out punishment.

While he’s been gone he’s felt the tenor of your emotions tugging at him – not tugging insistently, and with how tightly you’ve tried to control and suppress your emotions over the past few weeks, this must mean you’re battling to keep things at bay, pushed beneath the surface. As soon as he enters, he clocks the spiking fluctuations of your hormones. Since returning with you from Wakanda, he’s read extensively over the heat cycles, and this situation gives all the signs that you’re vacillating precaiously between falling into either a standard heat or a dry heat. You’re trying to stave off the heat as long as possible, but it will come, and if you fight it too hard, it will be a dry heat, which will be physically and mentally painful for you and difficult for him to navigate with you. He needs to edge you carefully from that tipping point of the dry heat.

You’re sitting at the table, having polished off one of the meals already and eating the last bits of the other one. It looks like they were boxes with sandwiches, fruit, and vegetables. You’ve left the celery from both servings. He smirks, but he’s glad you’ve eaten. That’s a good sign.

In another attempt at normalcy, desperate to keep things at bay, you push the chair out across the table from you with your foot, nodding for him to sit. You try and engage him in completely normal lines of conversation. He knows what you’re doing. He’ll entertain it for at least a little while so he can assess more of your state and how he should handle it.

He’s more concerned with watching you than listening to what you’re saying. You stand to refill your cup with water, and he follows you to the sink. He reaches into the cupboard and gets a glass of his own, encroaching somewhat into your space very casually. It doesn’t put you on edge, so he eases even closer, as you continue to talk. He puts a hand on your shoulder and leans in to fill his cup with the tap. There’s a slight hitch in your breathing at his proximity. He pushes the teasing of his closeness even more, moving his hand down your arm and resting it on the counter next to yours.

“I know what you need, Omega,” he whispers against the shell of your ear.

He can feel you do everything you can to remain still.

But then you turn your head ever so slightly toward him. “The last time you touched me, you humiliated me.” Your voice is flat.

He doesn’t respond, but he also doesn’t move.

Finally, you ask, “What did they do to you?” your voice barely above a whisper.

The dangerous question comes out of nowhere, and the surge of emotion it evokes in him is immediate. He growls, whipping away, not even thinking before he slams his fists on the table. It splits in two clean pieces. He grabs one before it even falls to the floor and throws it against the wall, smashing it, splinters flying.

He turns back, advancing on you, and you’re already trembling. He doesn’t relent, forcing you up against the wall, caging you in. He pounds his fist into the wall right above your head, and you close your eyes, afraid to move. He can smell the fear in your scent now, but there can be no confusion here.

“No, Omega,” he speaks low, and his other hand moves lightning fast to grip your chin. He can feel your pulse racing beneath his fingers. “Look at me.” You open your eyes. “We aren’t doing that.”

He leaves a beat of silence between you.

“Do you understand?”

You nod.

He drops your chin, then grips the neck of your shirt and yanks, ripping the fabric down the front and jerking you forward, making you bump into his chest. He picks you up and hauls you across the room with a few furious strides to drop you onto one of the armchairs.

You right yourself in the seat as he steps back, but only an arm’s length away. He doesn’t have to use his alpha voice or say the words. He knows the look he gives you communicates his instruction: stay put, don’t move.

He slowly undresses, unfastening, unbuckling, unzipping. He places each article of his dark tactical suit in an orderly pile on the coffee table. It’s purposeful, this tactic. The onset of your heat is only a moment away. You’ve been doing everything in your power to stave it off. Part of him clocks this enormous show of strength and sees it for more than stubbornness, recognizing the discipline and power within you. But this has gone on long enough, he needs you to finally tumble over the edge, and he will push you if he must.

He watches you watching him as he reveals each expanse of naked flesh – arms and torso, legs, and finally his loins when he slips off his boxer briefs. He’s hard for you, of course he is, the pheromones have been flooding out of you, and he wasn’t tempted to touch you in Turin, but now it’s all he can think about. He wants your body supple and pliant, submissive beneath him. He stands above you, looming, imposing – he knows he is, and he wants you to feel that he can do this – and pumps his cock slowly with his own fist.

He does it a few more times, watching you watch him. He sees the small ripple of a shudder you can’t suppress when your breath hitches.

“Undress,” he commands.

Your jaw ticks up. He knows you don’t like it – he felt it the first time he gave you an alpha command, and he hasn’t again until this moment. You look down as you reach behind your back to unclasp your bra and slide it off, dropping it to the floor. You stubbornly refuse to meet his eye since he’s making you do this – he knows it. You hook your thumbs into your waistband, and you push your leggings and underwear down in a slight huff.

“Spread your legs,” he issues another command.

You do, still refusing to meet his eye. Part of it is the irritation over the commands, but he knows part of it is also the trepidation still pulsing through you. He doesn’t want to make this easy for you, but he doesn’t want you to suffer the agony of a dry heat where you’ll be agitated, devoid of slick, in pain, and distressed.

He sinks to his knees between your parted thighs, but now you can’t help but look at him staking his claim there so close to your exposed core. He can see you have a million questions in your eyes, it’s the most you’ve allowed him to glimpse of you – the real you – these past weeks.

He lowers his head, keeping his eyes on yours, and licks a slow, broad stripe from the side of your knee along the soft flesh of your inner thigh. He can feel you tense and hold your breath. And he stops inches from your warm cunt, pulling back and kneeling back on his heels.

You whimper.

He knows he has you now.

“Touch yourself, Omega,” he doles out the third command. He knows how he wants this to play out.

“Don’t make me,” you plead, but your hands are already slowly moving to your center.

“Do it,” he barks, and you flinch.

There’s a little bit of slick between your pussy lips, and he watches you trace a finger slowly over your folds, up and down. You drop your head down and to the side, refusing once more to look at him.

“Omega, have you ever experienced the pain of a dry heat?”

You huff.

“Is that what you want?”

“I want him!” you blurt, and you certainly must not have meant to say it out loud because your hands immediately fly to cover your mouth and your eyes flash to him in fear. And anger. Both are there.

He growls and surges forward to claim your clit between his lips, clamping his hands at the juncture of your thighs to keep your legs open. He sucks hard and flicks his tongue angrily over the little bundle of nerves, drawing a cry from you immediately. Your hands push at his head, but there’s no match for his strength, and he holds your pelvis firmly to his face.

“No, no, no,” you murmur, starting to cry.

He keeps up the furious sucking and flicking, and it’s less than a minute before he feels your whole body seize up, frozen as the first orgasm crashes down on you. Slick begins to seep out in abundance, and he hums in approval, but he doesn’t relent, only changes his tactics. He flattens his tongue and laps at your cunt, letting his tongue slip between your folds and into your hole every two or three licks. It’s less frenzied, but no less insistent, and he rips a second orgasm from you easily. He hums in approval as this time that blissful wave forces you to throw your head and shoulders back, and you land against the back of the armchair, clutching at the rim of it next to your head.

But he won’t relent yet.

He reaches up to cup one of your breasts in his hand, and you moan and push your chest forward for him, head still thrown back, and he imagines your eyes must be shut. He squeezes your breast, then tweaks your nipple, and your breath hitches. He presses his mouth back to your folds and works his lips over your puffy, engorged clit, working slowly this time. He draws his hand away from your breast, and then he slides the fingers that just tweaked your nipple into your tight heat. He pumps slowly, and your hand moves to the back of his head, applying insistent pressure there. He crooks the fingers and strokes along your front wall, and he knows he finds the spot of your undoing when your legs abruptly shift, the left lengthening out, and your right hitching up over his shoulder to press into his back. He doesn’t change a thing now, sucking, pressing. He knows you’re on your way, but he will not hasten this. He wants you to feel every drawn out moment of this – some but not enough of what you need.

Paying attention to every breath above him, every movement of your body, and especially the way your muscles start to squeeze around the fingers he has inside you, he stops just short of your third orgasm.

You whine in protest, but he pushes himself up to stand above you. He grabs your waist and hauls you easily with his preternatural strength up and over his shoulder. You claw at his back, but it’s only a few quick steps for him to be able to throw you down onto the bed.

Your fear from his outburst is long gone, and the face you turn up at him is angry, and you snarl, quickly kneeling up on the bed.

He grasps your chin in his slick-covered hand and looks into your face. “You will beg for me, and only then will I consider whether or not I will touch you again or let you suffer.”

He drops your chin and is already turning away, but you’re lightning fast in reaching for his wrist.

He stops and only inclines his head part of the way to look back at you.

“Take me,” you plead, voice stronger than he expected.

He furrows his brow.

“Please,” you implore.

He turns fully back to you. Perhaps he shouldn’t be as surprised as he is. You’d always been adaptable and clever, and rarely stubborn to your own detriment. You had been stubbornly trying to hold the heat at bay, dangerously so to tempt the dry heat, but he knows this is an extreme circumstance for you, and with the tide turned yet again, he was almost impressed that you had so quickly determined it was worth it to take what you needed.

“Then present,” he says simply.

You turn, moving up to the middle of the bed, but close to the headboard, and kneel on all fours.

He climbs up behind you.

You drop down to your elbows, subjecting yourself to him, omega to alpha.

He takes his cock in his hand and rubs the angry red tip up and down your slick folds. You whimper, and he sees the small shiver that runs down your spine. He sinks his thick length into your tight heat, and you both groan as he fills you for the first time. He doesn’t move once his hips are finally flush against your ass. He breathes in and out, in and out, and watches your measured breaths as well.

He did not know it would be like this.

He reaches forward, grips your shoulder, and pulls you up and back towards him. Your hands move to reach out to steady yourself on the headboard. He presses his fingers into that juncture at your neck where he claimed you, and you keen, throwing your head back. He leans forward and while his right hand stays anchored at your hip, his left strokes that bite again, then moves to hold the front of your neck as he leans down and forward over you. You look up at him, he looks down at you. “You’re fucking mine, Omega,” he growls, your eyes locked.

“Yes, Alpha.”

Then he feels you rock your hips back against his. He smooths his hand down your neck, then presses his lips to your forehead. “You’re mine,” he says again, imprinting the words against your skin.

Then he pulls back and thrusts into you. A few thrusts like that, but as you begin to keen for him, begging for more, he has to drop back and grip your hips with both hands to fuck you. You both come twice – once quickly, and once more very slowly – before you’re boneless beneath him, and he forces you down to the mattress, shifting you to your side and drawing you up against his chest. You whine, but he strokes your arm and promises he’ll give you more once you sleep.

While you sleep in his arms, sticky and sweaty, his mind goes to work.

It’s not long before you wake again, and you two truly fuck, carnal bleeding with a few moments that are too tender for either of you to acknowledge. But his stamina outmatches yours and he has you exhausted and sleeping again before long.

He’s never taken care of an omega in heat before, and it’s all-consuming, but he stays focused. When you’re awake, he plies your body with pleasure until you cry, keen, moan, scream aloud and silently, and it goes on and off again between sex and sleep all through the day. He’s prepared for your reluctance during the first high phase of the heat to eat or drink anything, but he slips you bits of fruit and nuts as he can, gets you to greedily gulp water only after he pushes it your way insistently. You want his cock, not hydration or nutrition.

A little before midnight the second night, you stretch and yawn waking from another of your short sleeps, and then you roll out of bed and pad to the bathroom. He’s been rooting through some of the cupboards, taking stock of what’s there, and he finishes quickly and follows you into the bathroom after he hears you flush the toilet and then turn on the showerhead. You’re slipping into the shower when he enters the bathroom, and he’s there in time for you to give the silent invitation for him to join you – the expectation, even.

You’re still in heat, but craving a shower lets him know you’ll have enough of your mind back for what needs to happen now.

Things are tenuous, but there’s no denying that this heat has changed things for both of you. He claimed you in Wakanda, but the two of you have bonded through the first thirty hours of this heat in ways neither of you thought possible.

He takes the lathered-up sponge you place in his hands, and he washes your body carefully. Then you take it back, soap it up again, and run it over his skin with the same kind of attention.

He washes your hair, you rinse away the suds, and then he pulls you flush against him. You take his hardening cock in your hand and pump shamelessly. He groans appreciatively, than pushes your back up against the tiles, moves your hands away, and pulls your leg up around his waist so he can enter you. You clutch at his shoulders for stability and moan. He buries his head into the crook of your neck, but he speaks just loud enough for you to hear, “This is the only place I’m sure no one will hear us, but they also need to have no reason to question what’s happening if they’re monitoring.” He moves his hips back and then pumps slowly into you again. “Do you understand?”

“Yes,” you moan, “more, Alpha.”

The corner of his mouth ticks up slightly, though he knows you can’t see it. He tongues his bite at your neck, and you whimper. He gives you another thrust, and you keen.

“I won’t have you anywhere near these Hydra personnel anymore. I don’t trust them.”

The surprised noise that escapes your throat is slightly distressed, and so he speeds up his thrusts a little. “My heat,” you whisper.

“The heat cycle is the only time no one expects me to be anywhere or respond to anyone unless there’s complete catastrophe, and I already reported the onset of your heat last night. They won’t disturb us for a few more days, and they will not expect us to attempt to leave our quarters let alone the facility. If we can manage to get out unnoticed, we will have enough of a head start on time to lose them completely.”

You remain quiet.

“Omega?”

“And go where?”

“You don’t need to know that.”

You push his face away from your neck and push at his chest. “I’m still nothing more than your bait?”

He growls and turns you around so your chest and face are pressed up against the wall.

“I’m still your alpha, and yes my end game is still to draw out the Soldat.”

“Why?”

“I need him.”

He nudges your legs apart and enters you from behind, and you groan as he fills you.

He pulls back, about to enter you again, but then you turn your head, and gasp, “Wait,” in a tone that’s different enough that he does, brow furrowing as he meets your eyes.

“Omega?”

“Tell me what happened to Sam, to you, and I promise I’ll go with you willingly.”

He didn’t think you knew Sam had been with him.

You reach for his head and urge him back to the cradle of your neck.

With more than your words and the gentle action, you’re also entreating him through the bond, he can feel it. It’s powerful. And so he tells you. It only takes him two sentences to tell you what you need to know. Tears stream down your face, and he fucks you then, the fucking he needs for him, not you, but you allow him to take.

go immediately to part three: Carving Through the Dark

↠ Main Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest

I do not do tag lists, but FOLLOW @buckets-and-stories and TURN ON NOTIFICATIONS to be updated any time I publish a new work!

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Growing Sharp Edges by Leocante [Rated G, 10218 Words, Complete, 2022]

Aaron just needed some wiggling room. He didn't think he was asking for that much - a few inches of freedom, a miniscule amount of life outside of school and exy, an ounce of control over his day. Well, thruth be told, he wasn't exactly asking asking. Questions like that resulted in a knife under his neck and an unyielding 'no'. But Aaron needed some goddamn wiggling room, and he was desperate enough to ask Josten for help.

tw: attempted sexual assault, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced drug addiction, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced murder, tw: recreational drug use, tw: alcohol

Who is the man in the relationship? by sugaroto [Rated T, 6986 Words, Complete, 2022]

"I'm your type." Neil went on. "Then I'm yours." Aaron shot back, "You're literally fucking my twin, asshole!" "High five!" Neil said, his eyes lightening up, "We're type buddies!" Neil started laughing. "What? What's so funny?" Aaron asked. "We should get married!" Or The time Neil and Aaron got drunk and thought it'd be funny if they got married.

tw: alcohol

NB: fic meme by @sugaroto here

Momentary Disaster by JostenlovesMinyard [Rated T, 1305 Words, Complete, Twinyards Appreciation Week 2022]

Day 2: Disaster Aaron and Neil are sent to do a grocery run but Neil loses something along the way. Aaron is there to help him.

You Are So Much More Than Your Father's Son by phan_taloon [Rated T, 3143 Words, Complete, 2021, Locked]

In which Nathan Wesninski has fanboys and Neil Josten doesn't want to deal with them, but Aaron is there to save the day.

tw: panic attacks, tw: flashbacks

A Pain Never Meant to be Felt (I really suck a titles, just pretend its good.) by transandsad [Rated M, 14187 Words, Incomplete, Updated Aug 2023]

Aaron is mistaken for someone he is not and has to figure out how to pick up the pieces in the aftermath.

tw: gang rape, tw: nonconsensual touching, tw: assault, tw: graphic descriptions of csa, tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: blood, tw: flashbacks, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: ptsd, tw: panic attacks, tw: suicidal thoughts, tw: murder, tw: drug addiction

Neil and Aaron swap body’s AU bullet fic by @sadboyayeron [Tumblr, 2020]

AFTG Neil & Aaron Gender Swap hc by @sadboyayeron [Tumblr, 2020]

friendship

Oblivious series by greencherrybomb [Rated T, Collection with 2 complete works, Updated July 2022]

Part 1: Oblivious in love (3152 Words) Andrew has been pining after Neil Josten for months, but knows it wont happen. Neil doesnt even swing, so he does the only thing to protect his feelings. Ignoring Neil and eating ice cream. Part 2: Best Friends Brother (3930 Words) Neil has been harboring a long time crush on his best friend, Aaron Minyards, brother Andrew. Too bad Andrew has been avoiding him at all costs and is dating the hottest guy in school, Kevin day. Or at least thats what Neil thinks.

Dear Little Ghost by choisunsanie [Rated G, 4650 Words, Complete, 2022]

Neil Josten starts to be haunted by a naughty blond ghost.

tw: previous major character death, tw: car accidents

And I Swear And I Swear, I Was Burning Alive by Miss_Fun_Fun_and_Fun [Rated T, 1477 Words, Complete, 2022]

Neil is confronted by his ex-best friend's twin brother while still reeling from his mother abandoning him. - A one-shot, alternate universe for Fortheloveofexy's fic, "More Than Words".

tw: implied/referenced drug addiction

NB: ‘More than Words’ was previously recced here (updated)

sexual experimentation

triptych by likearecord [Rated E, 12805 Words, Complete, 2023]

Three parts, three POVS. Aaron, wondering, picks up a guy in a bar. Neil, having learned something, wants to try again. Andrew, knowing nothing, sees something he likes.

tw: explicit sexual content, tw: nonconsensual touching

friends to lovers

Every Sinner Has A Future by OfficialStarsandGutters [Rated E, 29864 Words, Complete, 2021]

Canon divergent Neil x Aaron. - Neil Josten. A shock of red hair and ocean blue eyes. Pretty faced, but nothing special. Except he makes a throwaway comment about Andrew being off his meds and it’s like everyone in the room forgets to breathe. Even Aaron, his body still and tense with surprise that he can tell them apart. Without even having met Aaron, he knew Andrew wasn’t him. That shouldn’t mean anything. Aaron rubs his sweaty palms on his skinny jeans and tells himself it doesn’t, it doesn’t, it doesn’t.

tw: recreational drug use, tw: implied/referenced drug addiction, tw: nonconsensual drug use, tw: graphic description of overdose, tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced murder

Art

monsters cuddle pile art by @emry-stars-art

au where aaron and neil are best friends first comic by @02511213942 also on twitter

when Neil tells Dr Aaron he’s fine art by @srslyarts

get in loser we’re going shopping art by @ouijacine

Josten and Aaron on press duty comic by @paradoxolotl

Aaron is a godfather comic by @paradoxolotl

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kohiiflux · 3 months ago

Text

March might be my favorite NPC in FoM now.

I will not ship him with my farmer (I might ship him with Ryis tho)- I prefer him to be my farmer's rival. I am on a creative rut for drawing but this is how I imagine the second heart event with March goes

Chapter 1: Jealous Much?

character: Farmer X Marsh (platonic)

Flori swung the hammer to her newly minted iron pickaxe. This will make it easier to collect materials for the general store. Ever since she put her past as a mercenary behind, she felt more trusting to her new life in Mistria. Although everything needs checks and balances in her eyes, Mistria seems so different than all the places she went.

It felt like a home that she could live and put her roots down.

"Finally" she sighed and drown her newly formed pickaxe in the water. A tinge of cold air suddenly flicked her neck. She felt she has been watched all this time.

"..... hello?"

The door behind her closed. In retrospect, March did call her to meet him. Out of all the villagers, she had always keep her distance from him the most. He had never really displayed friendliness outwardly, so Flori would rather not disturb him except for important matters.

Out of sight, out of mind, and out of respect for his privacy.

Flori raised her eyebrows and followed suit.

"You called?" Flori closed the door behind her

"I didn't think you'd actually show" March scoffed.

"I hear you have made yourself useful around town, everybody only has good things to say about you." March put his hands to the table, his eyebrows furrowed slightly.

Flori sensed the tense atmosphere and contemplated on things to say. She had never really thought on being a positive influence at all. She's here for work, a job offered by Adeline for all qualified adventurers. Flori stayed silent and held any reservations to keep her job and estate, and decided that conflict with the town's blacksmith must be avoided at all costs.

"Well" Flori put on her smiling act, something she learned living as a freelance mercenary.

"It's been lots of fun helping around town, I am glad I can be of service-"

"Cut the act." March cut her short.

"We both know what's ACTUALLY going on here." He glared at her, tearing down her walls of smile.

"Oh please, you are in way over your head. You come out here, no farming experience, and you think you can fake your way through running a farm? And now everyone in town acts like it was YOU who won the best blacksmithing trophy three years in a row." March continued his deathly stare.

Flori felt insulted, but he was right. Flori was never a farmer, she only knows the basic of gardening and tending on animals from her mother who is the royal gardener, but she did not work hard for this position.

"It's all fun and games now, but the second things actually get tough I am sure you are going to ditch Mistria and all its problems."

Flori had enough, she had withheld every single wits before , but it seems like no one ever puts the young blacksmith out of his ego before.

"I have worked in other places, I don't know March, have you heard about transferable skills before ? Have you even stepped out of your comfort zone once in your life?" Flori approached him calmly and returned his stare. March knew he stepped out of line now.

"Jealousy is an ugly thing, March." Flori tapped her fingers on the table, a small gesture that shake March's core.

March stuttered.

"We will see." He hobbled his way backwards.

Both insecure individuals glared at each other. Their stubbornness is fighting one another.

"You think you can hack it for the long haul? Here."

March gave her a hoe infused with a lightweight spell, Flori raised an eyebrow.

"You made this? I've never worked as a blacksmith but I give you this, I can tell this is skillfully done." She inspected the hoe.

"shut up." March looked the other way.

"If you fail, you can't blame it on my lack of help from me. Who knows, maybe you will surprise me." March walked away signaling the end of the tense atmosphere.

"I mean, I am here still standing tall. Ain't that surprising enough ?" Flori calmly excused herself out of the door.

"See you around." March continued his work around the workshop.

"Stood your ground huh. I like that." Flori closed the door.

-End-

Tell me if you want a chapter two for this angsty friendship rivalry thingy!

#fanfic #fields of mistria #fom farmer #fom march #enemies to friends trope

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thefallennightmare · 2 months ago

Text

Just Pretend-Chapter Twenty Nine

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit.

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader

Authors Note: So what originally was supposed to be a super long chapter, I decided to cut it in half! So JP will end with Chapter Thirty-one! Also, this chapter speaks HEAVILY on endometriosis and not being able to conceive so please, read with caution if that may be a sensitive topic for you. 🖤

Tags[CLOSED]: @blueskylinesx @missduffsblog @hayleylatour @sleepyomens @loeytuan98 @artificialbreezy @marvelousmal @bngurngheart @lma1986 @dsireland86 @wild-child-7747 @calleyx13 @illmakeyousaywow @jaded-and-hollow-souls @exitwoundsx @shayzillaaaa @badomensls @princesspeach-00 @shadowseve @collective-heartbreak @klutzy-kay24 @sorrowsofsilence @sweetlittlekitsune @shilohrosechicken @itsafullmoon @toospooktocute @niicoleleigh @thatchickwiththecamera @hoe-for-daddywise @whenthesummerdies @thisbicc @sammyjoeee @joe9cool @ozwriterchick @teenblues @malice-ov-mercy @krisslee18 @xxkittenkissesxx @happi-goth @embracethereaper42 @softvgold @cncohshit @heyyoplayer @rain-down-on-me @bloody-delusion-expert @respectfulrebel @reader13000 @koskeepsake @malerieee @cheyyyyr @myownthoughts12 @noahsbong @laurpartyprogram @cloudykoookie @jessiskyee @a1ex-ba1ex @sideeyenoah @emzandthevoid @badomensls @bellaboo967 @waake-mee-up @rxdlstgn @anthemheatwave @lobolocaamo @cncohshit @amelia-acero @karenfranco @collidewiththesavannah @xserenax-13 @bleachampion @thepastelfae @supersquirrel1996 @madomens @themodern-daywednesday @oxythoughtin7715

THIS IS FICTION. NONE OF THIS IS REAL.

READER

I paced the entire bathroom while muttering under my breath and cracking my fingers nervously. My heart was beating so fast, I felt like it could explode out of my chest like one of those aliens in that one movie Davis made me watch last night. I grasped at my chest underneath my shirt, desperately hoping the pounding would stop.

This was the longest five minutes of my life.

I peeked at the timer on my phone and sighed; two minutes and 12 seconds left to go.

Weeks of feeling sick and sheer exhaustion had been nothing new for me, especially with my endometriosis. But there was something new that had me in this current position of nervousness.

My period was late. I’d always been regular, every month if falling either on the same day or two days difference but never this late.

Two weeks late.

My bottom lip was raw from how hard I’d been chewing on it and my feet ached from how fast I was pacing the space of the cold bathroom; Noah made sure to set the A/C to a chilled 66 degrees before he left this morning. Our plans of meeting had been pushed back by an hour because of my last minute decision. I knew he was wondering where I was since I heard his text tone while the timer had been going.

Excitement filled my veins because of the small idea that our future together could finally get the thing we both secretly wanted. Something that would make us complete.

I rested a hand over my stomach as I stared down at the timer on my phone.

Quickly hitting the cancel button, I took a deep breath and slowly reached for the overturned test on the bathroom counter. So many different thoughts ran through my mind; names, genders, color schemes for the nursery, who they would look like, and how loved they would be.

Negative.

I blinked slowly at the words on the pregnancy test, feeling my heart drop down to the depths way below my stomach. All the happiness I felt for possibly overcoming the hard parts of my endometriosis shattered in pieces around me. The prospect of a life that was never meant to be mine was ripped from my hands before I even had a chance to grasp it.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I blew out a shaky breath, doing whatever I could not to let the negative test break me. I should have expected it, women like me with these issues can't get pregnant. A baby and family with Noah wasn’t meant for me.

Kuma came bounding into the bathroom, shaking off the excess fur that had been littering the ground lately causing Noah to run to the store the other day to buy a Roomba.

Letting the test fall to the bathroom counter, I reached down to pet Kuma between the ears and sniffled away my tears.

“Hey bud. Ready to go?”

With a wag of his tail and a bark, he followed me closely as I went about the bedroom now, gathering my things. I was going to drop Kuma off at his favorite dog daycare on my way to meet Noah at the location for the next Bad Omens music video shoot.

Noah.

Pausing in the middle of my bedroom with one arm in my jacket and the other pulling up my leggings, I reached for my phone that was placed on the bed.

Mochi 🍡: I sat in the chair for almost six hours to look like this so when you walk in, you better still love me.

Attached to the text was a picture of Noah, one that made me let out a small yell of surprise.

Me: Woah, is this what I have to look forward to in the future? If so, sign me up.

Mochi 🍡: All yours for as long as you want, angel.

Even through the pain and utter feeling of loss, I broke out in a small smile.

Me: Hm, forever seems good to me.

Mochi 🍡: Ditto.

After sending him a text to letting him know I’d be there soon, I finished getting dressed and walked into the kitchen with Kuma trotting behind to see Michael giving himself a pep talk in the reflection of the patio door that led out to the backyard.

“I thought you would have left by now?” I asked.

He smoothed out his hair and adjusted his jacket. “I would have but I’m so fucking nervous. I’ve been on dates before so I’m not sure why this one has me shaking.”

“Because you like her, Michael. You’ve been talking almost every night. She’s waited almost a month of you taking things slow to ask her out. Lori wants this just as much as you do,” I said while ruffling his hair and scurrying away before he could retaliate.

As I reached the front door and clipped on Kuma’s leash, I noticed Tay coming down the stairs.

“Hey, you still don’t mind picking up Kuma from daycare tonight, right? I’m not sure how long I’ll be at this shoot.”

She eagerly smiled while tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “Definitely! Jesse and I were planning on taking him to this cute little dog cafe downtown if that’s alright?”

It was my turn to nod. “He would love that.”

“Everything alright?” Tay questioned while raising a brow. “You look like you’re about to cry.”

Blinking rapidly, I cleared my throat and averted my gaze down to the ground. “Just tired. Noah’s been gone the last couple of days for this shoot. I don’t sleep well without him.”

Tay sighed while grabbing both of my hands, forcing me to look at her. “You can talk to me, you know that right?”

Pulling my lips in a thin line, I nodded. “Ye-yeah. I know. I promise I’m fine.”

Before she could say anything else, Jesse emerged from the back yard through the kitchen patio doors where he had been cutting the grass; shirtless. Tay’s attention was immediately averted towards him which I used as my opportunity to slip away.

Waving goodbye to them, I put on a brave face and prepared myself to shift into work mode, hiding the pain behind the smile on my face.

NOAH

I bounced on the soles of my feet, excitedly waiting for Y/N to arrive. My one gloved hand was shoved deep in my coat pocket while the other was out as I stared down at the makeup that went into making it look old and wrinkled; along with my face. We never had plans to make a music video for Just Pretend but with how it blew up over night on Tik Tok and we realized how much people love the song, we knew it had to be done.

Just Pretend was mine and Y/N’s song, something that was meant for the two of us. But my mind immediately began to run with ideas on how we could make the music video work for our Concrete Jungle universe. Thankfully, she was on board with the entire idea even though she was a bit worried about her being in the music video with me.

“It’s just your arm and bracelet, angel. No one will see your face.”

“Five minutes, Noah!”

Glancing over my shoulder towards Erik, I nodded. “Y/N’s almost here.”

Erik Rojas nodded with a sly smile before looking back at the computer monitor, going over what we had shot yesterday with the younger couple in the music video. I worked from 8 in the morning to nearly midnight and by the time I got home and crawled into bed next to Y/N, she was fast asleep. This morning, I left even earlier with a kiss to her forehead. For nearly six hours, I sat in a chair so the make up department could age me by sixty years.

“Well, who’s this handsome fellow?”

Turning on my heels, my heart soared into my chest when I saw Y/N walk through the door of the building we were shooting the video in, her usual glow behind her; one that I immediately noticed was muted gray, darkness creeping in.

“Are you alright?” I questioned while cupping her cheek with my gloved hand.

Her face faltered, only for a moment, before she gave me a bright yet forced smile. “I’m tired, that’s all. I can’t sleep without you.”

The pain was evident behind her smile. I parted my lips to ask her again but Y/N was quick to change the subject.

“So this is what old Noah looks like, huh?” She tapped my wrinkled cheek before scrunching up her face in disgust at the large premade stain of my white shirt. “How bad is it bothering you that you can’t wash that?”

I groaned while letting my eyes shut. “So bad.”

We both shared a laugh as I brought her into my embrace, catching her wrist with my gloved hand. “Did you wear your bracelet?”

Motioning towards her caught wrist, I pulled down the sleeve of her jacket to see the silver chain around her.

“I never take it off, Noah. You know that.”

All I could do was nod, the festering feeling of Y/N hiding something from me was a storm inside of me. We always talked to each other about things that were bothering us so it upset me that she tried to keep this to herself. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, I could read her like a book and she was the part where the main character was about to do something drastic to keep their secrets. Knowing that now wasn’t the best time to bring it up, I averted the subject for the time being.

“Does this old man get a kiss from his best girl?”

Y/N hummed while stepping on the tips of her toes and brushed a kiss across my lips. It was one that was barely felt, gone before it registered in my brain. Something unlike her.

“Angel,” I began but she was swiftly called over by the make up department, needing to get her ready for her part of the music video.

Giving them a nod, she turned back towards me to ruffle my hair. “I’ll see you in a bit, mochi.”

She slipped through my fingers like a ghost, further creating distance between me; physically and spiritually. My gaze lingered on her, long after she was gone, and I tried hard not to let the worry I felt for her cloud my mind today. We still had a lot of work to get done on this music video.

“Noah, you ready?” One of the assistants helping out Erik called over to me from his position next to the old chair surrounded by monitors.

“One second,” I said while pulling out my phone and clicking on the ‘House Boy’s’ group chat.

Me: Did Y/N seem weird to you guys this morning?

Michael: Nope. She gave me shit about being nervous for my date with Lori.

That was normal for her.

Jesse: Tay said when she ran into Y/N before she left, it looked like she was about to cry.

My head snapped up from my phone down to the hallway where Y/N had just walked down moments before.

She was crying?

Me: Something seems off with her. I tried to talk to her about it but she blew it off.

Jesse: I’m sure she doesn’t want to ruin the mood for the shoot. Maybe try talking to her about it again later?

I sighed, knowing that Jese was right. Both Y/N and I were professionals when it came to our work; here wasn’t the place for a conversation that could potentially lead to her crying.

Me: You’re right.

Me: Also, Michael, can you feed Salem? I noticed his food bin was empty but didn’t have time to refill it on my way out this morning. We keep the extra bags in our bathroom closet.

Michael: That’s a weird place to keep extra bags of cat food. But sure. I’ll do it for my bud Salem.

Pocketing my phone with a breath, I shifted into work mode and spent the next little while filming my part of the video; finger pressing the button of the remote in my hand and clawing at the tube in my throat. It was pretty easy and went smoothly. By the time I finished, Y/N had returned dressed in a white cardigan sweater and her left arm done with the special effect make-up, her bracelet sparking under the low light of the set as I sat up from the chair.

“I still think we should have aged you by sixty years so we could match,” I joked as she reached me.

“Will you read to me by the ocean when I’m old and gray?” She teased while pulling me closer by my own sweater to press a kiss to my lips.

“Until our last dying breath,” I vowed with all the seriousness in my voice.

Our eyes met in a fiery trance, neither of us wanting to break it first and the longer we stared at each other, I could see the light slowly beginning to ignite behind hers once again. The light that was her halo, however, was still flickering.

“Are you ready for your big moment?” I asked as we began walking down the long hallway towards the made up hospital room where Y/N would be.

She snorted while linking our fingers together, hands beginning to sway between us. “All I have to do is lay there while the doctors try to save my life. Just show the bracelet and make sure it looks pretty.”

I pulled us to a stop in the hallway, twirling her around and pulling her into my chest; her laughter echoing all around us.

“That shouldn’t be too hard for you because you’re always pretty,” I winked before capturing her lips into a kiss.

This one had a bit more force than the last but I could still tell something was bothering her. It pained me that I wasn’t able to talk to her about it because it was evident that something happened this morning before she left the house, something pretty important that she felt the need to keep hidden.

My phone buzzed three times in the pocket of my pants but I ignored it, deciding to keep Y/N in my arms just a few seconds longer. She brushed away a few strands of hair from my face.

“I can’t get over how good you look,” she breathed over my lips before pushing away from me and following Erik into the room at the end of the hall.

With a cheeky smile, I walked back towards where I was previously sitting in the chair with the monitors around me. The plan was for me to wake up from my memory core dreaming when the memory of my younger love was dying and follow the doctors down the hall to where old Y/N was laying in the bed dying.

My phone buzzed again in my pocket as I sat back down in the chair and when I fished it out of my pants, I gave a confused furrow of brows at Michael’s missed call and texts.

Three of them, in fact.

Michael: DUDE WHY AREN'T YOU ANSWERING YOUR PHONE.

Michael: Has Y/N said anything to you more about what was bothering her?

Michael: I fed Salem by the way.

Knowing I only had a few minutes before we needed to start shooting again, I quickly typed up a response.

Me: No she hasn’t. She seemed fine now when I was talking to her. I think whatever was bothering her, she’s over it now.

Michael: You sure about that?

“What?” I muttered under my breath.

Me: What the fuck do you know?

I couldn’t wait for his response because soon Erik poked his head into the room. “We’re about ready.”

Tossing my phone over to Bryan who had been on the set with us taking pictures, I pointed to him. “If I get another text from Michael, will you let me know?”

He nodded. “Yeah, sure.”

Even though my mind was whirling from Michael’s texts, I did my best to not let it affect me. All we had left was a few hours of this music video shoot and then once we were back home, I could talk to Y/N about what the hell was bothering her.

READER

Stifling a yawn behind my hand, I dragged my feet up the freshly cut lawn towards the front door, ready to put an end to the very long and exhausting day. The darkness of the night sky blanketed over me, bringing a chill to my bones. The thought of being able to wash away today and crawl into bed brought a small smile to my lips, although it never reached my eyes.

Glancing over my shoulder towards my car, I expected Noah to be following behind me but I frowned when I remembered he stayed back on set for a couple of reshoots he and Erik wanted to do. Pulling out my phone, I sent him a quick text.

Me: I made it home. I’m going to shower and get some sleep. Please don’t be too late, I miss sleeping next to you for more than a few hours.

Noah responded before I even had a chance to pocket my phone.

Mochi 🍡: I’m actually leaving now. Erik is forcing me to leave since I’ve been here since 8 this morning. Save me some hot water? I need to scrub this glue shit off my face.

Smirking, I stepped through the unlocked front door while typing away my message.

Me: Better yet, I’ll wait for you to shower. Save water, you know?

I wasn’t able to see Noah’s response because I jumped, nearly dropping my phone when my eyes landed on the figure sitting in the corner of the barley lit living room. His eyes darker than the cloud that had been hovering over me all day and I took a large step back against the wall behind me, clutching my chest.

“Please tell me you told him,” Michael sat up in his chair, elbows on his knees.

I swallowed thickly while adjusting the strap of my bag on my shoulder. “I need to take Kuma out.”

I made it all of two steps before he rose from his spot, his deep voice stopping me in my tracks.

“Did you tell Noah?” He repeated again, this time more stern than the last.

“What are you talking about?” I semi snapped, turning towards him.

“Don’t play dumb, Y/N.” Michael scoffed while resting his hands on his hips. “I found it.”

My face blanched, all the color draining from it and I cleared my throat. “I have no idea-.”

“Fuck, Y/N. You left it on the bathroom counter!” He exasperated while running a hand through his already disheveled hair.

“You went into my bathroom?!” My voice was raised as I pinned him with a thin stare. “That’s an invasion of privacy, Michael!”

The sharpness of his face softened just a fraction with the hardness of my tone so he let out a long sigh.

“Noah asked me to grab the extra bag of cat food from your bathroom so I could feed Salem. I swear I didn’t touch it but I saw it lying out on the bathroom counter,” he explained.

Fuck.

I remember getting distracted with Kuma this morning so I never threw it out. I left it out on the bathroom counter, out in the open for anyone to see; for Michael to find.

“Did you tell Noah?” I questioned with a tight grip on the strap of my bag, knuckles turning white.

Michael shook his head. “No. It’s not my business to tell him. Do you plan to?”

I let out a staggered breath while shifting all of my weight from one foot to another. I thought about telling Noah about what happened this morning but with how busy we were today, I never found the best time to. And to be frank, the work space wasn’t exactly a perfect scene for this kind of conversation.

“It’s better he doesn’t know, Michael,” I blew out a shaky breath as the tears welled up in my eyes.

The walls that I had made to block myself from the dreaded feeling of failure were crumbling, cracks withering deep within my soul. Noah would have been crushed if I told him and the last thing I needed was for him to feel like he was the failure when none of this was his fault.

It was on me.

Michael gently took off my bag and set it on the couch before wrapping his arms around me. His familiar embrace brought on the tears, rapidly falling in quick succession and I gripped at the front of the shirt, letting the feeling of my shortcomings and lies overcome me.

His large hand rubbed at my back. “It’s alright, Y/N.”

“Why would he want to stay, Michael? I’m broken. Unfixable. He doesn’t deserve that,” my sobs were muted by his gray sweater as I buried my face into Michael’s chest.

Sympathetic hands lifted my chin so I had no choice but to look into his eyes.

“You. Are. Not. Broken.” Michale’s word were punctuated by a tender squeeze of my cheeks.

I couldn’t speak, couldn’t even nod with how from his grip was, so I remained silent.

“Noah still loves you, even with these flaws you claim to have. You know deep in your heart that he deserves to know the truth because if he finds out another way, it’s going to hurt him even more than you keeping it a secret,” Michael said.

I did my best to nod. “I-I know.”

“Good,” he kissed the top of my head in a protective brother sort of way. “I’m sorry if I came at you like a dick. It wasn’t my intention.”

I gave him one final hug before pulling away. “It’s alright. You were just worried about Noah. I’ll tell him. I just need time to process everything. I haven’t had a chance to breathe and mourn the idea.”

Michael nodded. “Understandable. Just don’t want too long, okay?”

“I won’t,” I sniffled.

With one final hug, I made my way through the kitchen down the long hallway towards my bedroom, with the sole intent of cleaning up the mess from earlier. As I stepped through the threshold, my aching heart doubled in size at what I saw. Salem and Kuma both curled up on the bed. Kuma had his large paw on top of Salem’s back, almost as if he was keeping him in place on the bed.

With a faint smile, I pulled out my phone to snap a picture just as Noah came barreling through the door seconds behind me; Salem and Kuma jumping from the sudden noise.

“Fuck!” I clutched at my heart, it beating hard in my chest.

Noah’s almond eyes were bright with excitement even with all the prosthetic glue stuck to his face still.

“Guess what?!” He asked while gripping my elbows.

I giggled at him as he gently shook me. “You can say avocado correctly?”

His smile faltered only for a fraction of a second. “You’re lucky we're in a time crunch otherwise I’d bend you over the bed and smack your ass for being a smart ass.”

Swallowing thickly, I managed to ask him what he was so excited about.

“Courtney called me while on my way home, I guess their opener for their show tomorrow night can’t make it because their van broke down. She asked if Hollow Souls could open up? The only reason why she called me was because she didn’t have your number.”

My heart was beating so loud in my ears, I thought for a second I misheard him so I had to wave a hand, stopping his rambling.

“Wait. Courtney as in Spirit Box? She wants my little band to open up for her?” I asked, dumbfounded.

There was absolutely no way a band like Spirit Box wanted Hollow Souls to open up for them? We weren’t on the same level as them; us farther down the list.

Noah chuckled while kissing my lips before moving about our room to start packing a bag. “Give yourself some credit, angel. Hollow Souls is one of the biggest metalcore bands right now.”

“Yeah but-,” the words trailed off as I chipped away at the fading nail polish.

“Y/N,” he sighed while setting down our matching pair of duffle bags on the bed. “You know Hollow Souls is where they’re at because of all the work you, Chase, and Malcolm have put in. Toot your own horn, angel.”

My lips curved up in a smile, knowing that he was right.

“I’m assuming you already told Chase and Malcolm?”

“Yep, they’ll pick us up in an hour. We figured we leave tonight and that way we’re there before soundcheck.”

Nerves ate away at my insides, this being the first time Hollow Souls performed on stage in quite awhile. We did have a future tour planned in a few months so this actually was a good way for us to dip our feet in again.

“Where’s the show?” I asked while finally starting to pack my own bag, Noah nearly finished with his.

“Las Vegas. It’s a two night event but they only need us for the first night so I thought we could do something fun while we're out there,” he suggested.

“Us?” I questioned while zipping up my suitcase.

Noah smirked, showcasing his pearly whites. “Courtney asked if I could come out during Holy Roller.”

I quipped a brow. “You guys do know both of you on stage together are going to kill everyone, right?”

He walked past me, leaving a kiss on my cheek. “Just think of what would happen if we were on stage together.”

I watched in horror as he walked towards the bathroom and I nearly stumbled over my feet to stop him; never having the chance to clean up the pregnancy test I left behind earlier. I beat him to the bathroom seconds before he could walk past the doorway.

“Uh, I’ll pack up the toiletries. Do you want to make sure that Jesse and Michael are fine with watching Kuma and Salem?”

Noah tilted his head towards me, confusion etched on his features. “You know they don’t care, angel.”

I pursed my lips. “Right. But I just want to make sure. Since it’s last minute, I’m not sure if either of them have something already planned.”

If he didn’t believe my words, he made no mention of it. Instead, he nodded before quickly stepping out into the hallway right outside our bedroom, yelling down to the living room.

“MICHAEL?! CAN YOU WATCH MY KIDS THE NEXT TWO DAYS?”

Rolling my eyes, I called over my shoulder while scurrying into the bathroom. “I could have just done that!”

“Then why didn’t you!” Noah shot back playfully as I scooped up what was left behind on the counter, forcing myself not to adhere to the rejection, and throwing it into the trash next to the toilet.

READER

I sat with my back against the headboard, knees pulled up to my chest as my sketchbook lay across my lap. It had been a very long day due to travel, and I only wanted to lay in bed while wallowing in my own failures. We returned back from Vegas earlier this morning, the last four days a whirlwind of emotions that I had yet to process. From the moment Hollow Souls opened up for Spirit Box, to seeing Noah perform next to Courtney, and from running into someone who I spilled all of my secrets to; one who understood.

My fingers were black from the charcoal clutched between them while Kuma lay at the end of the bed and Salem perched on Noah's pillow. I hummed a quiet tune, finding myself deep in the zone that helped keep the moment from last night out of my mind. All of my hopes and dreams were crushed in a matter of minutes and it was something that was still severely affecting me. I made a mistake, one that I was afraid I’d never return from. I refused to let Noah know what happened. It was a secret that I planned on taking with me to my grave.

"Angel?"

"Hm?" I answered Noah, not bothering to look away from my sketch.

"What's this?" He asked, voice stern with anger.

Glancing over to his frame as it stepped out of the bathroom, I sucked in a breath when I saw what he'd been holding. All of the colors drained from my face as the room around us shifted on its axis, everything falling away from me without giving me a chance to grasp it.

Shit.

My negative pregnancy test. The one I thought I had thrown away before we left; four days ago.

Swallowing thickly, I set down my sketchbook and sat up straighter. “What is that?”

Noah’s eyes narrowed in on me as a scoff left his lips. “You tell me. I found it in the bathroom trash can.”

“Why are you digging through the trash?” I asked, deflecting his curious eyes as I picked at a loose thread of our blanket.

He rested his hands on his hips, still holding onto the damn test. “I went to empty the bag and noticed the test sitting on top. How long has it been there?”

“It’s none of your business,” I shook my head, not bothering to meet his gaze anymore, unable to process the look of pure hurt on his delicate features.

“Bullshit!” Noah spat with such force in his voice, it made my face flinch. “I’m tired of how you’re keeping things from me! It started last night with Joe and now this-!”

He held up his hand, waving the test around. “You don’t get the right to hide something like this from me, Y/N!”

“I didn’t keep Joe a secret from you! I told you he was there,” I reminded him, still sitting on the bed.

Kuma and Salem could feel the tension rising but made no effort to leave us.

“You won’t tell me what you two talked about,” he reiterated, our earlier conversation from the car still lingering between us.

Last night while we were in Vegas, I ran into Joe in the lobby of the hotel we were staying in. nothing, nowhere had a concert in a few days hence why he was in Vegas. Noah was up in our room, sleeping, and I had come down to get more towels from the front desk. Instead of hurrying back up to Noah, I stayed with Joe catching up on one of the couches in the lobby. I spilled everything to him about my hopes and dreams of a family with Noah to the negative pregnancy test. Joe was there as a shoulder to cry on as I poured my soul out to him, bleeding out and barely holding onto my heart.

After an hour of conversation, I promised I would keep more in contact with Joe and headed back up to my hotel room, where Noah was still fast asleep. It wasn’t until this morning I brought up that I had run into Joe and spent part of the night talking with him. When he asked what we talked about, I merely told him we just caught up while talking about both of our separate music careers. If Noah caught on that I was lying, he made no mention of it as we drove home with Chase and Malcolm in the backseat; neither of them knowing my secret.

For the briefest of moments, I thought that Noah had forgotten about the test in his hands.

“Did you take it this morning?” He tossed the test onto the bed before running a hand through his mahogany streaked hair. It had been a while since I gave him a haircut so the strands were always falling into his eyes.

“What was the result?” Noah asked when I remained silent, still keeping my eye cast down to my lap.

Since it had been a few days, the negative lines faded, not showing Noah the result. When I still said nothing, not finding my voice to tell him the truth, I could feel his displeasure radiate off of him in droves.

“God dammit it, angel! Look at me, please!”

The sheer brokenness in his voice as it cracked finally made me raise my head up towards him. “I’m tired of you shutting me out. I deserve to know what the result was.”

Noah slowly reached for me, hands linking with mine as he pulled me to my knees on the bed so his tender fingers could caress my cheek. Tears ran down my face, unable to hold back any longer. For days I did my best to keep up the facade that everything was fine, I wasn’t falling deeper and deeper into the abyss of defeat. But one longing glance from Noah as his eyes bounced between mine had me crumbling.

“Angel,” his voice was rough as he begged. “Please tell me it was positive.”

A broken sob fell from my lips when I saw the hopeful gleam in his eyes and did my best to shake my head in his grasp.

“It was negative.”

Noah now stood before me a shattered shell of the man he’d spent so long protecting. Every ounce of happiness that he had expressed from that one look was gone, replaced with an all too familiar one.

Disappointment.

“When did you take it?” He wondered, again doing his best to stay strong; not just for me but him as well.

“The morning of the Just Pretend shoot,” I admitted in a quiet breath.

Noah’s brows pulled together in a line before his hands fell from my face. “You knew about this for the last four days and you didn’t tell me?”

My lips parted, unable to speak when I realized I had outed myself about my secret.

“Were you even going to tell me, Y/N?” His voice shook, trying his best to not break down. But his eyes shone with tears.

Slowly licking my lips, I did my best to ignore the way my heart was beating so loud in my chest it felt like I was about to cave in. My world was collapsing, slipping through my fingers because of my own failures and stupidity.

“No,” I answered in a breath.

NOAH

Tossing my gym bag next to the front door, I let the cool air help dry the sweat dampening the back of my neck as I stepped farther into the house. It was quiet, eerily quiet for a Tuesday afternoon. Typically Jesse would be in the studio garage working on ERRA stuff while Tay would be at work and Michael would be either playing a game in the living room or reading out back. They were in neither of those places. Even Kuma was gone but I didn’t fret too much about that one, knowing that someone had dropped him off at daycare earlier today. He was steadily growing in a house that was already too small for an Akita so he needed the extra space of the play yards at daycare to run around, exerting as much energy as he could before coming home.

Salem was perched on the top part of his cat condo in front of the window in the living room; the one I had bought for him when we first moved in here. The sun’s rays blanketed him in a bright glow, his black fur almost shimmering.

“Hey bud,” I cooed while scratching his ears. “Is mom home?”

A futile question. Y/N had barely been home the last couple of weeks, spending whatever free time she had either at Malcolm and Chase’s place recording stuff for Hollow Souls or helping Astrid out at Fika. They were down two workers and with Jolly being tied up in the studio with us, it meant Astrid was back to working long hours. Y/N, being the kind soul she was offered to help out. What originally was supposed to be a few days helping out turned into two weeks. Y/N would wake up in the morning before the rest of the house and leave with a kiss to my lips. Some nights, she wouldn’t return home until well after I was in bed with Kuma and Salem. I never questioned her about it, knowing that she was telling the truth on where she was due to her location on LIFE360. I also never questioned her about her long days and nights knowing that it was her way of coping with the negative pregnancy test.

We hadn’t talked about it since that night I found it in the trash. Part of me couldn’t help but think it was because Y/N was ashamed of the result. She knew how much I wanted a family and felt like a failure that she was unable to give me that. Even though I assured her all the time that between her and our pets, that was more than enough family for me.

My words meant nothing to her. It was as if it went through one ear and immediately out of the other. No matter how much I repeated them or spoke them into the skin of her neck as we lay tangled together in the sheets, it did nothing to fill the empty void in Y/N’s heart.

With a deep sigh, I dragged my feet through the empty kitchen, down the hallway towards my bedroom. The door was closed which gave me pause almost immediately. Whenever Y/N or I left, we always kept the door open, in case Kuma or Salem wanted to come and go. According to LIFE360, Y/N was again at Fika, so with the closed door in front of me, I couldn’t help but wonder who had been in our room.

Pushing the door open, I peered inside to see the bed still made just how I left it before I went to the gym and the patio door still cracked open to let in the chilled autumn air.

Maybe a gust of wind shut the door?

Letting out a choked breath with the familiar feeling of being forgotten clutching my jugular, I kicked off my shoes into the closet and trudged into the bathroom. The air was cold, not from the air conditioner but from the absence of the one that held my heart; the one my soul yearned for time and time again when Y/N was away.

Cliche but I didn’t care. She was my other half, the moon to my stars and the sun to my rays. When Y/N was too far away, the invisible string that ties us together nearly disintegrated. But when we were together, nothing could cut the string. It became invincible with the love we shared.

Again, cliche. But I couldn’t give a fuck what anyone thought.

Stripping out of my gym clothes that clung to me with dried sweat, I tossed them into the hamper next to the shower and turned the dial all the way to the left, letting the steam slowly begin to fill the bathroom. I stretched my arms above my head, muscles screaming in agony from how far I pushed myself today with Ash. I had weeks of pent up emotions that I was unable to exert any other way than in the gym. Ash knew something was wrong but didn’t want to pry, especially when there were others around that could easily eavesdrop on our conversation. Not like I would have told him because no one knew about the negative test besides Y/N and I.

Well, scratch that; Michael knew only because he saw the test on the bathroom counter. He promised us that he wouldn’t tell anyone about it and we knew we could trust him. This secret wasn’t his to tell.

I finally stepped into the scalding shower, the water hitting against the large tattoo on my back as I hung my head low, mind swirling to thoughts of Y/N and what she was doing currently. I texted her when I left the gym if she was going to be home for dinner, to which she responded with two simple words.

Angel 🪽: I’ll try.

Bullshit.

She never tried. Any chance Y/N could do to avoid the problems between us, she took it. She opted to help out others before herself, running herself rampant and nearly in the ground rather than face our problems head on. Y/N put others before herself, which wasn’t anything different. Yet this time, it was worse. I couldn’t remember the last time I actually watched her eat a full meal or had more than six hours of sleep.

We all could tell she’d been on edge the last couple of days, afraid that if we said one wrong thing that Y/N would snap. It felt like we had to walk on eggshells around her because of this fear. Tay wouldn’t say it but I could tell she was uncomfortable with the energy Y/N had been radiating, making the tension of the house thick with negativity. We knew it wasn’t her fault but there was only so much more one of us could take.

Me especially.

Y/N had been pushing me away ever since we came back from Vegas but Michael assured me that it wasn’t intentional. Deep down I understood that but my heart hurt everytime I would reach for her in bed and she would brush off my touch or turn away when I would attempt to capture her lips in a kiss. If she wasn’t the one initiating the contact, Y/N would push me away.

Once the water had run cold, I shut off the shower and stepped out, wrapping a towel low around my waist. Steam covered all the reflective surfaces but I didn’t bother to look, not caring to notice yet again the dark bags under my eyes. With Y/N being gone so often, I felt like I’d barely slept.

When I walked back into the bedroom, I saw Kuma curled up in the overly large dog bed in front of the patio door, snoozing away unbothered.

“Who picked you up, bud?” I muttered mostly to myself as I walked into the closet, pulling on a pair of briefs and black joggers. Then slipping into a plain white shirt, I hung up the towel back into the bathroom before walking out into the kitchen, towards an array of weary voices.

Suddenly I remembered that we were having everyone over tonight for a barbeque and more than anything, I wanted to crawl into bed with Y/N, who was standing in the middle of the kitchen with a pulled expression on her face. Her skin had lost all its color and the dark circles under her eyes were worse than my own, indicating she was getting less sleep than me.

As soon as I stepped into the kitchen, Kuma immediately ran towards Matt, who held Boo in his hands. After a quick greeting, Matt set down his dog to which both of them ran through the open patio door into the backyard. Feeling me watching her, Y/N looked up from slicing the tomatoes, resting her tired eyes on me.

“Hi,” I said while shifting on my feet. “Did you pick up Kuma?”

She made a grunt that sounded like a yes. “After I stopped at the store to buy everything for tonight. Something I thought you were going to do.”

Davis and Jolly, who were standing next to me, stiffened with the tone in Y/N’s voice. Matt and Faye were leaning against the wall next to the fridge and I could tell that they were having their own hushed conversations. Micheal and Jesse were outside, getting the grill ready. Astrid was standing next to Y/N helping her set up the side dishes for the dinner tonight and she rested a soft hand on her arm.

“Y/N-,” Astrid began but Malcolm, who was stocking the fridge with drinks muttered something in her ear.

I clenched my fists at my side when I realized how we all were yet again walking on eggshells around Y/N. I loved her but it wasn’t fair how she was treating us. But I bit my tongue knowing that if I snapped back at her, it would only escalate the situation.

Chase came up from behind me and rested a hand on my shoulder. “Just let it go, Noah.”

I planned too, like I always had but Y/N spoke again.

“I thought you were going to stop at the store to pick up stuff for dinner tonight,” she grumbled as she sliced a new tomato.

“I forgot that the barbeque was tonight,” I admitted while stuffing my hands deep into my pockets.

Y/N rolled her eyes before angrily slicing the tomato now. “Figures. Did you by chance pick up my packages from the PO Box?”

I swallowed. “I was in the studio all morning and then went to my training session with Ash right after. I didn’t have time. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t fucking talk to me about not having time, Noah,” this time when she sliced into the tomato, it rocked the cutting board. “I asked you to do two things tonight while I was gone. I’d been running myself ragged helping everyone else. The least you could have done is gone to the fucking store.”

My jaw clenched as I was about to retort back; however someone beat me to it.

“Y/N,” Faye’s soft voice echoed in the filled space of the kitchen as she tentatively took a step towards her. “Don’t you think you’re being a little harsh? Noah apologized.”

Y/N dropped the knife and whipped her head towards Faye. “This isn’t your fucking business, Faye. Stay out of it!”

Matt quickly pushed himself off the wall and stood between the two women. “Take a second and cool off, Y/N. Faye did nothing to warrant you snapping at her like that. She’s concerned like the rest of us are.”

“Fuck off! It’s not a concern. You guys just want to control me and my life when in fact you don’t know shit about me or what's going on!”

Matt’s eyes narrowed from underneath his hat. “Of course we don’t know what’s going on! You don’t talk to anyone. Noah says you’re barely home anymore, too busy helping others when you can’t even help yourself. You don’t even see how you’re hurting everyone around you because you don’t even see yourself.”

Malcolm stepped forward but Matt’s snarl pinned him in place.

“I don’t know what you’ve got going on outside of us, this family, but it’s been eating away at you. You’ve been in a nasty ass mood and if you think treating the people who love and care about you like this is going to make it any better, you’re dead fucking wrong. Our family is strong and while it’s not perfect, we fucking work through the bullshit together. If you think you can continue going on and dealing with your shit alone, then you’re destined to fail.”

My eyes never left Y/N as Matt’s words hung in the air, dancing around her in a mocking tone.

Failure. Failure. You’re such a fucking failure.

“Alright that’s enough!” My voice boomed, causing everyone to stop what they were doing and Jesse with Michael trailing behind to step back inside.

“Noah-,” Matt started but I pinned him with a glare as I stepped around the large island towards Y/N.

“We need to talk. Now!” I demanded while linking my fingers with her and all but dragging her down the hallway towards our bedroom.

The door vibrated against the walls as I slammed it shut behind us, not giving Y/N a second to speak before I started to speak.

“What you did out there,” I pointed towards the closed door. “Was so fucking wrong on all kinds of levels.”

“It wasn’t her business!” She shot back while crossing her arms over her chest.

For the first time since I laid eyes on her tonight, I noticed she was burying herself underneath my yellow sweater; almost hiding herself from everyone. Her usually styled dark hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail, wild strands falling into her tired face and either she was too weak to brush them away or couldn’t be bothered to care. Even through all of it, she still looked breathtaking.

“Faye didn’t do anything! You didn’t need to snap at her like that.”

Y/N raised a brow while scoffing. “So what, you’re taking her side now?”

I blinked for a moment before letting out a very long breath and ran a hand through my still damp hair.

“It has nothing to do with taking sides, Y/N. It’s the fact that you’ve been acting cold towards everyone. You’ve been avoiding the issues at home by keeping yourself busy in places that don’t need you.”

“Astrid needs my help,” she fought back. “Fika has been busy every day since the new menu and the open mic nights every Friday.”

“She hired three new people this week alone. Does she really still need your help?” I questioned while resting my hands on my hips.

Y/N pursed her lips, no words forming on them.

Point proven.

“When you’re not at Fika, you’re in the Hollow Studios,” I blew out a shaky breath when my voice began to crack. “You’re putting others before you. You’re always helping other people out instead of taking care of yourself. When was the last time you ate something more than a granola bar or a salad?”

She was still quiet so I continued. “I’m tired of seeing you exert all of your energy on others when you’re barely hanging on, angel.”

It was as if my nickname for her softened the hardness around her, only a bit.

“I’m fine, Noah,” Y/N sneered while pacing in front of her vanity.

It had been untouched for weeks, gathering dust along the surface. She barely took the time to do her makeup or hair. Not that any of that mattered to me, I always thought she was beautiful no matter if she wore makeup or not. But I knew it made her happy, gave her a sense of peace in this crazy life we built together.

“You’re not, angel,” I noted while taking a step towards her.

She whipped her head around to face me. “Stop acting like you know me! I’m fucking fine. F.I.N.E. FINE! I’m so tired of everyone saying there’s something wrong with me when there’s not!”

“Everyone has been walking on eggshells around you! You snapped at Faye for no reason. All she’s done is care for you!” My voice was now raised, matching hers.

“I’m not fucking doing this!” Y/N ran fingers through her hair, gripping the ends. “I can’t keep having the same argument with you, Noah!”

I scoffed. “You want to talk about being tired? I’m fucking tired of you walking away when things get to real for you, Y/N. I’m so tired of you taking out your anger and frustrations out on me. I’ve been by your side through it all yet you keep lying to me!”

It was her turn to scoff, almost immediately going on the defensive. “I haven’t lied about anything.”

My brows raised and I rested my hands on my hips. “Are you sure about that? Did you already forget about the pregnancy test?”

“Fuck you, Noah!” Her dark eyes sliced through me. “I can’t believe you’re still hung up on that!”

“OF COURSE I AM!” I bellowed, my voice undoubtedly being heard throughout the house.

Even though my back was facing the patio doors of our bedroom, I could feel many sets of eyes through the open blinds.

“You lied to me about it! You kept the result from me and had no plan on telling me. After you knew what Jessica put me through. The trauma I went through for years because of her. You promised me you would never put me through that but you did!”

Y/N’s jaw ticked as her shoulders went rigid. “I didn’t fake a pregnancy.”

“No, you didn’t. But you kept the results from me,” I reiterated. “You said it yourself you weren’t-.”

“I DID IT FOR YOU!” She screamed, cutting me off, and I cowered when something flew past towards the wall behind me, glass shattering to the ground.

Salem, who had been creeping into the room through the somewhat open door, scurried back into the hallway from the tone in Y/N’s voice and the sound of something breaking. She grabbed a picture of us off of my nightstand and threw it in her rage.

I stood in front of her, dumbfounded Y/N actually threw something. My eyes were wide as my chest rose and fell, trying to calm my racing heart, all the while Y/N looked unphased about what she did.

“I didn’t tell you because I couldn’t bear to see the look on your face when I told you it was negative. You want a family so bad, Noah. I can’t give that to you. I can’t,” her head shook rapidly.

I threw my hands up in the air. “I-I don't fucking want that, Y/N. I just want you!”

Her bottom lip wobbled as she let out an unsteady breath, refusing to meet my gaze even when I took a few steps towards her which caused her to take larger steps away from me.

“I can’t do this,” Y/N murmured while playing with the ends of her hair, turning swiftly on her feet.

She made it all of two steps towards the door when my shattered voice stopped her in her tracks.

“You promised you wouldn’t leave me again! Not like this!”

“So what if I do? Are you going to find Bailey and fuck her again?” Y/N snapped, pinning me with her hateful gaze.

I stumbled back, her words catching me off guard. I knew my decision to sleep with Bailey that night was something that still bothered Y/N, even if she pretended it didn’t. It was a decision that I still regret. I didn’t like who I was back then and the choices I made reflected the dark place I was in during that time.

“That’s low, Y/N,” I growled, the noise vibrating in my chest.

There was some sort of noise from the other side of the cracked door, something sounding like feet scurrying away and cursing. But I didn’t pay too much attention to it. The woman in front of me, the shell of the woman I love, wasn’t even phased with the words she spat at me.

“You should go back to her. She can give you what you want,” Y/N shrugged before crossing her arms over her chest, popping out a hip.

She needs that attitude fucked out of her.

Everything happened all at once; me taking two large steps towards her and pushing Y/N against the wall, pinning her with my large frame. Her hands pushed my chest, trying to create more distance between us but I slammed them above her head.

Tears burned in the corners of my eyes and my bottom lip trembled as I gazed down at her, broken and defeated.

“I feel like you’re doing whatever you can to avoid being with me,” I confessed with a sob. “If I’m not enough for you, after the negative pregnancy test, then please let me know. Stop dragging me along, pretending everything is fine when it’s not! If I’m not worthy anymore, then just fucking tell me, Y/N.”

“It’s me that’s not worthy!” She admitted while thrashing against my hold on her hands. “I’m not worthy enough for you!”

Somehow with her rage, Y/N was able to break free from my grasp around her wrists and pushed me away.

“My body continues to fail. Failing at giving you what you deserve. I can never be worthy enough for you!”

I reached for her, only for her to push me against my chest yet again. “I’m broken. Some days I sit quiet in my head lashing out in thoughts I never said! Those thoughts of how I failed you and our future!”

“Y/N, you didn’t fail,” I assured, trying to reach for her, this time smacking my hands away.

“I get so sick of wearing skin and it only gets harder to pretend that I’m not a disappointment.” Y/N wiped away the snot from her nose on the sleeve of her sweater.

“And then you stare into my fucking soul,” she pounded on her chest. “Like you know that it’s letting go of yours. I can’t take the look of disappointment on your face every time you look at me!”

“I-,” the words died on my lips, knowing that it was futile to try and argue with her because it was true.

Whether I wanted to believe it or not, I couldn’t help but look at Y/N with some short of disappointment lingering at what we could have had together. Guilt ate away at me for even feeling that way. It wasn’t Y/N’s fault that her body could give us what we both secretly wanted.

“My skin crawls every time I see you look at me with those eyes,” Y/N shivered, her upper lip curled in a snarl. “Knowing that I disappointed you.”

“Angel,” my voice caught in my throat as the tears burned in my eyes.

“No!” She screamed when I reached for here one more time and slipped away from me towards the patio doors in our bedroom.

Her face was red and blotchy from how hard she’d been crying and her breathing was erratic as she tried to calm herself. She paced the width of the room while running a shaky hand through her already messed up hair and then ripped off her sweater, letting it drop to the floor. The dark circles under her eyes stained the beauty that I adored. Gone was the sun kissed skin, replaced with a ghostly pale that told anyone who gazed at her that she wasn't alright; she wasn’t taking care of herself.

The light was physically gone from Y/N’s halo and fear sank low in my gut that I would never see it again.

“You've been through the rough, angel. Was my love not enough for you?” I questioned on an end of a broken sob.

Y/N froze her pacing to land her broken gaze on me and those lips I haven’t properly kissed in so long mimicked a fish as no words came from them. Her shoulders fell and I could practically see the air leave her lungs when her head moved the slightest fraction.

“I-.”

My body went rigid as my heart shattered when I noticed something else that was different with Y/N.

I pointed a shaking finger at her bare neckline. “Where’s your necklace? Your bracelet?”

“Fuck,” she cursed, hands flying to her neckline hoping to hide the missing jewelry she claimed she never took off.

Please, let me wake up from this nightmare.

#tina talks #noah sebastian #bad omens #just pretend noah sebastian #bad omens cult #noah sebastian fanfic #noah sebastian fanfiction #bad omens fic #bad omens fanfic

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lokisgoodgirl · 2 years ago

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I'm one of the poor souls that didn't know the mango thing until just now

Listen, it's a process 👌🤣We're learning new secrets of the mango all the time. I swear there should be a Netflix doc in the style of 'Don't F*ck with cats` about this entire Internet realms loki escapades and collective bombshells and headcanons.

Don't F*ck with Loki, perhaps. Just a bunch of thirsty fanfic hoes discussing canon vs fanon and the mango and basically every aspect of his character we've ever threaded about. Ideally shot in Greece in a nice villa because that would be a riot.

To be fair we might need to concoct some kind of intrigue but hey, Netflix have made worse.

Oh shit...imagine if Tom Hiddleston showed up in Loki costume "unannounced" at the end - oh ny god oh my god

Sorry I got a bit carried away @fruit-caught-on-camera 🤣 You up for a Netflix deal? @lokischambermaid @gigglingtigger @maple-seed @coldnique @mochie85 @vbecker10 @michelleleewise @fictive-sl0th @simplyholl @ozymdias @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @xorpsbane @muddyorbsblr @mischief2sarawr @thedistractedagglomeration @wheredafandomat

#HEIMDALL OPEN THE BIFROST

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granvarones · 9 months ago

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“here is a message to the super hoes”

whew, name a more iconic and sex-positive opening line of a hip-hop song released in 1998 - during the genre’s golden era? well, maybe i am being hyperbolic, but almost every lyric in “jimmy” by the pioneering new york hip-hop group boogie down productions is a foundational text.

music enthusiasts, critics, and historians all agree that the late 1980s was a golden era for hip-hop. artists like public enemy, NWA, eric b. & rakim, and boogie down productions (BDP) were all reshaping the genre’s landscape by utilizing powerful storytelling for social commentary and activism.

composed initially of KRS-one, d nice, and scott la rock, BDP emerged in 1987 with their explosive and critically acclaimed debut album “criminal minded.” the impact of BDP’s hard-hitting style of rap narrated the realities of life in the bronx during the ronald reagan era was immediate. sadly, BDP was dealt a devastating blow in august 1987 when member scott la rock was murdered, just months after the release of the album. he was 25 years old.

by the release of BDP’s sophomore album “by all means necessary�� in april 1988, the group’s music had transitioned towards a more socially conscious and political commentary. inspired by Black revolutionary malcolm x’s philosophy of self-determination and empowerment, the album tackled topics ranging from racism, poverty, education, health, and the AIDS crisis.

“cuz now in winter aids attacks

so run out and get your jimmy hats”

written, produced, and performed by KRS-one, “jimmy,” short for “jimmy hat,” was a metaphor for condoms and was revolutionary for its time. amidst the track’s frenetic beats and melodic rhymes, the song delivers a crucial public health message about safer sex, prevention, and the responsibility we all have to protect our health and the health of our communities.

youtube

before the 1980s and the emergence of AIDS, condoms were primarily viewed and recommended as a means of preventing pregnancy, with their role in preventing sexually transmitted infections (s) receiving less emphasis. but by the mid-1980s, there was a collective effort by health organizations, activists, media and popular culture to normalize condoms and conversations about safer sex as a form of STI and HIV prevention.

“do me a favor, wear your hat”

while not officially released as a commercial single, "jimmy" was a standout track from the "by all means necessary" album and garnered radio play in the summer of 1988. just a few months after US surgeon general c. everett coop sent 107 million copies of a pamphlet titled understanding AIDS, to every household in the US. this effort remains the most extensive public mailing in history.

boogie down productions’ “jimmy” is a pivotal moment in hip-hop history, demonstrating the genre’s capacity to engage with pressing societal issues. through their innovative approach to music and social commentary, BDP set the tone for artists like bell biv devoe, ice cube, salt n pepa, and TLC to use their platform for advocacy and/or safer sex education.

“jimmy,” with its candid message about safer sex and HIV prevention, served as an essential intervention in 1988, utilizing hip-hop to reach young people. the song remains a powerful reminder of hip-hop’s role in public health awareness and the genre’s enduring impact on pop culture.

#granvarones #gay #queer #latinx #afrolatinx #storytelling #trans #aids #lgbtqia #songs that soundtracked the aids epidemic #hip hop #Youtube

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roo-bastmoon · 2 years ago

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BTS Tutorial: Stationhead & Renaissance

Stationhead is an app that connects to your Apple Music or Spotify account and allows you to stream music in a community so that every person’s streams count toward your artists’ chart. Supposedly this app can rival radio (it’s early days; we will see).

Apple Music and Spotify both work on Stationhead's web player.

If a host is playing their songs from Apple Music, and you only subscribe to Spotify, the matching track from Spotify will play through your streaming account. In the same way, a host using Spotify to play music will have songs matched for Apple Music listeners. So it's a great cross-platform tool.

It can be kind of fun to know you’re streaming with hundreds if not thousands of other ARMYs, especially when you are targeting milestones for certain songs and you don't want to think too deeply about how to build a playlist... but it’s not necessary if you want to just stream on your own accounts.

You need to listen to at least 30 seconds of a song on Stationhead for it to count toward charts.

Here’s a short tutorial about how to set up a Stationhead account, but in my case, I will search for BTS and Jimin on Station head instead of Stray Kids (sorry, Stray Kids—I think you’re cool but I’m a loyal hoe.)

After you download the app and set up your profile, I recommend you search for the following communities on Stationhead and join them:

JIMINCHARTSPH

JIMINGLOBAL

JIMINRECORD13

When a live streaming party is about to start, you’ll get a little notification on your phone and you can decide to join. Then you listen to streams. To maximize your time in the first 24 hours of a release, maybe have Apple Music play on one laptop, YouTube play on a tablet, and Stationhead or Renaissance app going on your phone (tethered to your Spotify). It’s free and it doesn’t spam you, it just takes a few moments to set up accounts on these apps.

If you’re still not convinced, here’s a review from a music professional that gets into the details:

youtube

Similar to Stationhead, Renaissance is an app that connects to your Spotify account. If you follow streaming accounts on twitter, they will sometimes throw streaming parties on Renaissance and it can be fun to join in and gather collective streams to achieve certain goals.

You download Renaissance from the app store, sign in (I use my gmail account and connect to my premium Spotify). Once logged in, you can search for Jimin, and there you’ll see various streaming parties going on. You click to join, it’ll open your Spotify account, and you can play that playlist along with hundreds and sometimes thousands of others.

It's simply a great way to find playlists and help meet benchmarks with the community, but don't feel pressure. It's just nice if you're engaging in streaming battles on Twitter; gets everyone psyched up.

Some people prefer Renaissance because you can be in control of your playlist (when to stop and start, the ability to count your streams), whereas Stationhead is more like radio, where the host is a DJ and they are in charge. Really it just all comes down to what you prefer and if you're part of communities that enjoy group streaming.

After our artists land on the charts, it's important to keep streaming so their songs have longevity and aren't just flash-in-the-pan, one-hit-wonders. Using streaming apps is a great way to let your accounts count for streams, without having to curate and manage playlists all day long. (But remember, 20 streams of a song, then login to a different Spotify account for it it count.)

Stream on, stream on, stream until your streams come true!

DISCLAIMER:

I am a Dope Old Person and have been ARMY since January 2022. So I still have a lot to learn.

I’m making mini-tutorials for people like me who are comfy with technology but totally new to voting, streaming, and buying Kpop stuff.

If you know of better, more up-to-date information, please comment or DM me so I can make sure I’m not spreading misinfo. Please be polite about it, though—we are on the same team!

Feel free to apply whatever you learn here to other BTS members and other artists; I’m Jimin-biased so I am focused on helping Jimin at this moment in time, but I’m OT7 so rest assured I’ll put my shoulder to the wheel for all our members!

#BTS_Tutorials #jimin #park jimin #face by jimin #jikook #stationhead #renaissance #Youtube

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sprites-writing · 1 year ago

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Chapter 13: Vigilante Shit

yeah I know its been like a year whatever

okay notes for this chapter:

1) It's no longer Miss Avocet that Freya found when taking Jake back to the present, it's now Miss Dove in case I decide to continue the series I don't have to work around Miss A being dead

2) I wrote this in less than 24 hours don't judge me too harshly

3) welcome to the wdid revival where its been four years since I wrote chapter one and my writing has improved drastically and I will (eventually) rewrite the first 2 chapters of this

4) also Freya is horny af for Enoch for a good portion of this because I was reminded about how fucking fine Finlay MacMillan is while rewatching the movie to write this

anyways Freya POV, 1523 words, enjoy

chapter 1 chapter 12

Between Miss Dove and Jacob, we were all quickly put to work.

Emma, Jacob, Enoch and I were put in charge of collecting tools for the others while they worked on latching the windows and barricading the doors. In the chaos, Abe’s nightly phone call was forgotten about until the familiar ringing filled the parlour.

The three of us glanced between ourselves before I gently eased the hoe from Jacob’s hands. “I think you should answer it tonight,” I murmured. Looking like he was half in shock, he nodded and quickly scurried off.

“Not entirely sure that was the best idea of ours, but yera, it can’t be worse than all the times we snuck out,” I said with a shrug.

Enoch gave a surprised snort, “Frey, I don't think anything can be worse than that.”

With a knowing smile, Emma took her section of the tools and left the sunroom. Enoch and I both hesitated, the makeshift weapons in our arms a glaring reminder that we were running out of time and yet still we stood there, our soft breathing and the racket from the parlour the only sounds.

“I’m proud of you, y’know,” whispered Noch. “Even if the others aren’t, I am. I’ll always be proud of you.”

I inhaled sharply. For some reason, this moment felt like it was crossing some unspoken line of ours, and it was quickly heading into a territory I wasn’t sure I was ready for.

“And because I know that wonderful brain of yours like the back of my hand, I know that you’re overthinking it but you, Freya Róisín Aoibh O’Sullivan, might have just saved us all.” The way he easily pronounced the Gaelic of my middle names sent a wave of hunger crashing through me. Although this was far from a new feeling for me, it took me by surprise every time.

It was like suddenly every single little thing he had done in the last sixty-five years slammed into me like a train. From the quirk of his lips to the gentle slide of his hand across my lower back to when his shirt was soaking after our weekly swims to the feeling of his fingers tangling in my hair while he slept, it all added up to me pretending like there wasn’t an ache in me that I didn’t think anyone else but Enoch could fix.

He smiled at me like there wasn’t anything different even though he had just added fuel to the fire inside me that he had lit a long, long time ago. As he walked away I stood there, trying desperately to shove the desire threatening to consume me down, down, down to where I could pretend it wasn’t there.

It wasn’t like I was some sort of blushing virgin. I was raised by my older sister for fuck’s sake. With no parents there to beat the fear of God into us for lusting, Máire had a habit of going after the boys around town and, more often than not, they’d end up in her bed. After enough times of Siobhan and I walking in on her, we learned to avoid our small house during the afternoons, instead playing with the other kids nearby. And, although it wasn’t allowed by Miss P, Victor and I found more than enough time to sneak away for an hour or so. Even if it benefited him far more than it benefitted me.

I sighed and resigned myself to the low heat pooling in my gut despite the horrible situation we found ourselves in. Returning to the parlour, I quickly started passing out the tools, trying to not let the way my friends, my family, were flinching as they took the tools, bother me.

Before long we were all standing against a wall, Miss Dove in front of us holding Miss P’s crossbow. “Now children,” she began.

I glanced at Enoch from where I stood beside him, wordlessly asking him if he was alright. I knew this would be killing him inside right now, remembering what happened in his loop in London. He squeezed my hand gently.

I’m alright.

I gave him a reassuring look and turned back to Miss Dove.

“Now that you’re all here, there’s a few rules. Your primary job is to stay safe. Leave the Hollow to me, I don’t want to see any heroics. Now, those of you with garden tools, I must insist that you—” Miss Dove was cut off abruptly as the Hollow pulled her through the window.

A mixture of gasps and shrieks left us as the danger we were in truly hit us. Jacob lunged towards the crossbow she had dropped and quickly aimed it at the window.

I frantically scanned the room, looking for some kind of sign as to where it was only to find nothing. The boards that were left from Miss D rattled as it entered the house, sections falling back into the garden.

As Jacob stood up, Enoch ran from where he was, throwing himself between Jacob and the Hollow.

“What are you doing Enoch?” I yelled. He glanced over his shoulder at me and his moment of distraction let the Hollow grab him.

Never in my life did I feel the terror that went through me as it picked him up. Not when Máire died, not when I killed Millie, not when Miss Gannett found me. The shadows from its tongues were the only thing that let me see what it was doing while he struggled.

I ran towards him, calculating where the Hollow was as I moved. I reached where I thought a leg was, my palm smacking the floor with a force I was only aware of because of the sound. It slammed Enoch into a window, shards of stained glass cutting my skin, desperation stopping me from feeling the pain.

I tried again, my hand aching from missing again as Jacob urged the others to get to the attic. For the third time I lunged, this time half a foot to the left and felt my hand grasp cold, scaly flesh. I squeezed, the Hollow’s tongues dropping Enoch as it died.

Completely forgetting that Jacob was still in the room, I rushed to my best friend. The moment he had stood up, I cupped his face in my hands.

“Are you alright?” He nodded.

I threw my arms around his neck, forcing him to take a few steps back as he adjusted. “Don’t do that to me again.”

“I won’t, I promise,” he said, burying his head in my neck.

We stayed there for a moment, just breathing each other in, until Jacob cleared his throat. With one hand, I flipped him off as Noch gently put me down.

The moment my feet hit the ground, the remainders of the window crumbled. Confused, I looked to Jacob only for him to be staring wide-eyed at the hole in the wall. “Run,” he whispered.

As we rushed to the stairs, the doors to the parlour were ripped off of their hinges, the second Hollow following us to the attic.

Once we were upstairs, Jacob quickly started to figure out a way for us to escape. “Okay. All right, um…” he looked around the small attic, twelve peculiar children watching him.

“Shit! It’s almost reset!” He opened the window, the familiar flashes of the bombs flaring outside. “Fiona, is there anything you can do with that tree?”

“Yes,” she said, nodding.

“Be careful, Fi,” begged Hugh.

Fiona slid out the window and down the slick, steep surface of the roof, landing on the gutter.

Once Jacob said that we were escaping through the windows, I turned to Claire, motioning to pick her up. She leaned away from me. “Claire Bear, I know you’re scared about my peculiarity but we don’t have time. The Hollow will get through at any moment and we need to get you out the window now.”

She hesitantly let me pick her up and hold her as we slid down the roof, the shingles scraping the shit out of my legs as I focused on not balancing wrong and sending both Claire and I to our deaths. Once we were down, I sent her over to where Jacob and Emma stood helping the younger peculiars to the tree branch Fiona had grown.

I turned back to where Enoch was holding onto the windowsill with one hand, helping Horace out the window. When he landed beside me, I yelled over the rain for him to “Go, go!”

“Enoch, come on!”

As he fell down the roof, I grabbed his arm to keep him from falling. “You’re not getting rid of me that easy!” he said. I rolled my eyes at him and started climbing over to the rest of the wards right when the Hollow burst threw the doors.

As carefully as possible, we followed the others down the branch, Emma and Jacob staying at the back to guide the little ones.

Before they even got to touch the ground, the bomb hit the house and we watched as the loop closed.

Pronunciation notes for her middle names and her sisters' names:

Róisín Aoibh: Ro-SHEEN Eve

Máire: Mor-uh

Siobhan: Shi-VON

yeah I'm well aware that that one line about the others flinching away from Freya when she gave them the tools is awkward but I can't be assed to fix it

chapter 14

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mistydeyes · 1 year ago

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Hallooo :DD I wonder if your pairings are still open so could I gracefully have a COD pairing? Ty<33

Pronouns: She / They

Appearance: Medium black hair with dark brown eyes(almost looks like black—) a thin like hourglass body shape. 5'5(HELP...) Mostly wearing turtlenecks, hoodies, n' oversized stuff.

Personality: I am an introvert and sometimes panics when ever I talk to someone I don't know. I keep myself reserved and dislike going out as much. When you get to know me better I lean onto the extroverted side and likes showing you stuff I made. A very moody person at times and my friends, based on what they say, I am a chaotic yet mother like friend. I am very easy to talk to and easygoing, I overthink a lot which usually leads to panic attacks. My friend say I laugh at the wrong time and I am not so proud of that—I am also easily distracted and place my focus on something I like rather than something I dislike. I could be manipulative at times as well as having trust issues because of past trauma :')). I sometimes have a flirting demeanor and tons of playful flirting to my best/friends and sometimes I come off as secretive based on my friends words. I prefer to care for my friends other than myself, once again trauma, and I seem to be a trustworthy friend. I have a goldfish memory which shocks me hoe much I know myself despite forgetting everything from the apat 3 hours. Also I'm very artistic! But I still suck at it smh 😔

Hobbies, Interests, work(?):

Drawing, Listening to music, Singing, and dancing! My interests are probably painting, collecting random stuff I found, playing the piano, and learning new languages! (I wanna be bilingual) I favor dogs a lot and probably adopt every dog i see which is a problem cause I can't handle so much 😭 I am currently studying in psych! Becoming an actual therapist because my friends need help, so do I.

John Price

How you met: Civilian You weren't sure what to tell people when they asked how you and John met. Technically, you didn't meet face to face until about three months after you stayed talking. You were connected through a friend of a friend due to your hobby of painting and him wanting to have a new landscape piece of artwork for his flat.

When you first heard of the request, you thought it would be simple commission. However when you talked to John and he revealed his laundry list of details, you knew this would not be something you could complete overnight. He wanted a specific landscape of a lake with trees and rolling mountains but also asked for details such as a man fishing in a boat and wildlife poking through the trees. If that wasn't bad enough, he also wanted it to be gigantic, a piece that he could display in the main foyer. If he wasn't so kind with your timeline and also the payment wasn't lucrative, you would have referred him to someone else. But unfortunately, you found yourself continuously buying paints and moving furniture around to fit the gigantic canvas in your flat. After exactly three months, you sent John a picture and agreed he would pick it up the following week. The day came and you heard your doorbell ring. You excitedly ran down the stairs to see your client in person. "John, so nice to finally meet you," you greeted as he shook your hand. "Can't thank you enough," he continued with a smile, "it was exactly how I remembered it." "Oh so this wasn't just something you found inspiration for online?" you questioned as you led him to the wrapped and packaged painting. "No, it was actually something I remembered when my Grandad used to take me fishing as a young lad," he said as you helped him to carry the large item to his car. "Well, I was happy to make that a reality for you," you replied and you both shared a tender moment. When you finally managed to get it secure on the bed of a truck, John asked if he could treat you to a meal. Maybe it was because you wanted to learn more about his past, but you readily agreed and the rest is history.

A peek into your relationship: "Y/N, we can't," John said as he tried to lead you away from the window. "But sweetheart, look at their eyes," you pleaded as you leaned down and held a hand to the window. The absolute sweetest English terrier was looking back at you and excitedly wagging his tail. John knew he was doomed as you looked at him and practically pleaded just to stop in the shop. "It's just to say hi," you promised as you entered but that was a complete lie as you fell in love with the excited puppy running around you and almost jumping into your arms. John tried to supply you all the reasons why you couldn't adopt a dog. "You don't time!" "Yes I do, I'm done with uni and plus I specialize in virtual therapy." "What if you forget to feed him?" "John, I have a goldfish memory but I would like to think I would remember to feed a pet that's right in front of me." "It doesn't make for a good guard dog" "Okay fair, but thats why I have you." No matter what he said, you always had an answer. Plus, your fiancé could deny that he loved the small pup as it pawed at his leg. With a sigh, he said you could adopt him and you peppered him with thousands of kisses. While John had to now buy all the amenities for a new pet, it was a noble sacrifice to see you so happy.

#izziespairings #madebyizzie #cod mwii #mw2 imagine #task force 141 #captain john price #john price x reader #mw2

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luvingmyships · 2 years ago

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Kitana Kai has always been the kind of girl too really not care what people thought of her. She’s always been the best at what she did.Academic's, sports, and serving looks, and having a great alluring personality that brought people in, especially all the the boys to the yard but in many of causes it didn’t work out with them.Commitment was the farthest thing from her mind. She liked going out partying/clubbing (possibly illegally)and meeting new guys and always been upfront with her intentions ,and it didn’t change when her dad kinda uprooted her life, and moved her too her homeland of japan where she’ll be collecting another trail of tears.

Hello to all who open up my work. This is one of the first stories I’m attempt to write my best, and I’m very open to critics lets just not be mean about it. In this story the main character is multi-racial, Japanese and Afro-Latina, is identity is what makes her HER. she’s fun, flirty, and also young women that makes a lot mistakes and helps her growth. I haven’t really seen many Haikyuu stories with a black women, and I took my chance to make one, Thank you <3

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

Kitana Kai

The thing about me is that I didn’t choose hoe life; it chose me. I wasn’t one to settle down in relationships. I’m young and hot, and I didn't want to limit my options, so in the meantime, I like messing with guys and their emotions. Sure, it might be a little immature, but I’m just giving them a taste of their medicine. Sometimes if they interest me enough, I might give them an inch. I like clubbing and going out and having a good time, and until now.

Some might say me being this way has something to do with both of my parents not being around. It’s not that they're dead; they are absent from my life more than I would like, and this is how I want to feel the void of it. My mom has been excluded from my life for the past fifteen years, and she cheated on my dad with a younger guy. The guy eventually left her, which led her into deep desperation is where my grandparents had to raise me. We had to come back to America from Japan because they thought I should see the other half of my family. My dad always tried to be there for me, but things were always getting in the way, working full-time and being a graduate student in engineering took a toll on him and his ability to care for me. It got better when he got his degree and had an excellent job waiting for him. While I was living with my grandparents for most of my adolescent life, my dad flew me out to see me about thousand times to spend the summer months with him and his new wife; and they also came to see me when they were able to, which made me feel seen as a child. My dad didn't have full guardianship because my grandparents wanted to. I reminded them of my mom, and my dad thought it was the most feasible thing for him to do.

My family is a little different than most because my mom is Afro-Dominican, and my dad is Japanese, not a combination you would see every day. However, they initially tried to raise me in the best of both worlds. Unlike most black biracial people, I had darker skin than most, which I had gotten from my mother. Born in Japan, having darker skin than the majority was the easiest; the only thing my father passed down to me was his eyes, where people could tell I was of Asian descent. I spent the first six years of my life in Japan, consumed by its culture; it became my first language. However, I'm still pretty proficient in Spanish and English, which made my dad think I was a prodigy to transition through them, which boosted my ego into the bad bitch I am today.

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The plane was closer to landing. Although Kitana was already ready to fly out of her seat to get them off, she had enough of the guy sitting next to her “accidentally” bumping and rubbing against her leg with his own. He thought he was so slick, looking at her sheepishly. She was ready to slap the shit out of him but risking the no-fly list was not something she wanted to do. God give her patience. She was on this plane now, landing in Japan because her grandparents thought it was time she got the chance to live with her father before she began college.

When the plane landed, Kitana stood up to get her to carry on, and the guy stood way too close, waiting to get his eyeing her up and down like he was sizing her up to see if she was a challenge.

“Do you need any help getting your luggage down, ma’am?” he asked her, already trying to reach for it, but Kitana had already snatched it down fast before he could intervene.

“No, I’m good,” she said, glaring at him rolling her eyes hard and making it down the pathway of the plane to get off. As if he had a sliver of a chance with her looking like he was fighting his receding hairline, a mortgage, and struggling to provide for his family of five.

When she made it to the airport, Kitana was already getting weird stares from the people in the airport, which she understood. She’s a black person in japan. In this country, most people wouldn't have seen black people in real life if it wasn't for television and the internet. Also, she looked confusing to most people in Japan. She had a prominent Asian feature with her eyes, but her brown skin, textured hair in a vast pineapple puff on top of her head, full lips, and slim, thick fat ass made people do a double-take, which the majority in japan does not have. Japanese beauty standards tend toward light, flawless skin, a slim, petite figure, slender legs, and a quiet personality, which Kitana did not possess when she had to speak her mind.

She tried to scavenge her dad in the sea of people that filled the airport; it didn't help that she was only five-four, so that didn't help the cause of trying to see over people's heads, so she just called her dad instead while grabbing her suitcase from baggage claim.

“Dad, where are you? I landed, and I don't see you?” Kitana said, pulling her heavy-ass luggage towards the escalator to a lower level, her piercing over the sea of people.

“ Baby, I’m on the lower level. I think I see you and your pineapple hair,” Kitana's father, Haru, said, laughing in her ear like he said the funniest thing ever. “Daddy, what did I tell you? It's called a puff; you've been with a black woman and got a black daughter and still don't know what a whole puff is with that big brain,” she said, finally getting off the escalator.

“Sweetie, you know I’m only playing with you,” Haru said, still chuckling while surprising her from behind and shocking her with a hug.

“Dad, I missed you so much; it's been too long, you know, not to sneak up on black people like that,” she said, laughing into the hug and squeezing him tight, not wanting to go because he was always there to confront the person. They started walking out of the entrance of the airport.

“I missed you too, Koibito. I’m glad we can finally be together as a whole family now; Aika and the kids are very excited to see you again, he said, to which Kitana wasn’t very surprised. Her step-mom Aika loved as if she was her daughter and would send goodies over the sea to America, and they talked on the phone almost twice a week more than she did with her father. Her little brothers also made sure their presence was known every week with FaceTime calls which she loved though it was a bit excessive. They were middle schoolers, so it's not like they had many people to call though it was appreciated.

“I’m excited to see them too, and I can’t wait to eat okaasan food. I know how she likes to make a feast every time I come around.”

“Yeah, I know she already started preparing in the morning, I just wanted to taste a little bit of it, and she hit me; also, we're not going straight home just yet. I know you're tired, but I have to pick up some important documents and items from my school, and you're going along,” Harui said while putting her luggage into his car.

“And here I thought I could just rest after my 13-hour flight,’’ Kitana groaned as she got in the car. “Don't worry, you’ll be able to rest later; it's not too far, and well, definitely make it in time for dinner.”

Kitana and her father made it out of the airport and on the ride to their first destination. They talked about her life back in America. She was at the top of her class in academics. She was a fantastic athlete in volleyball; she took her team to championships twice. She was a very accomplished person for where she was; her uprooting to live in Japan just changed the flow of everything. It's something she has to get used to. Her dad reassured her that she would do excellent even in the new environment; she would thrive.

They pulled up to Shiratorizawa Academy, a private high school in Sendai, the capital of Miyagi Prefecture. Her father teaches a couple of classes throughout the day, besides being an engineering professor at one of the nearby schools' colleges. Since the entrance exam is challenging, most students get accepted by studying hard or through sports scholarships. However, Kitana cannot attend since her father teaches, and since she has yet to take their entrance exam before her first year, it was never going to happen. So instead, she would attend Karasuno High, located in Miyagi Prefecture; it’s a bit farther. But her dad promised her a car when she came here, so it will not be a problem.

Looking out the window, Kitana saw a massive group of boys running in the same uniform, purple practice shirts, white shorts, and a zip-up jacket about half a mile away from the school, piquing her interest. They were all tall, so she guessed either basketball or volleyball for their sport of choice. They all turned to face her as the car was driving by, and she examined them, and they all looked cute to her, but the one that caught Kitana's eyes was in the front leading the run. The number on his back was number one. He was fine and had permission to get in her drawers whenever he wanted. He would tower her by a lot, she was only 5’4, and he looked above 6 feet. He had a nice lean-bulky body that Kitana wouldn't mind climbing. Unlike the rest of his team, He turned to look at her with an automatically resting bitch face that and stoic statured. Kitana stared right back at him and winked directly as they passed him. She had a thing for men like that. It was kind of her toxic trait.

When the school came into her line of sight, she was impressed with how big it was and how the building was structured. It did look like they prioritized sports in their school. There was horseback riding, tennis, and a soccer field outside. They had two separate outside gyms for the girls and boys where basketball and volleyball were practiced and played. She wouldn't have minded attending this school and joining the volleyball team; she saw reports on how both genders of the school dominate the sport of volleyball. It ranked 8th in the whole country. Who wouldn't want to be a part of that? But it's okay because no matter where she goes, she will dominate the team.

Kitana's father parked the car near the school and followed suit out of the car with him, and she was too nosey to explore the school. The sun and warmth felt great on her being outside the cold ass plane.

As Kitana and her father were making it towards the school entrance, the boys finally caught up and gathered at the front of the outside gym building, all trying to catch their breath. Their arrival brought out an older man in a tracksuit replica of their uniform, walking up to the somewhat middle-aged man supporting a buzz cut and glasses. Kitana was trying not to look, mind her business, or get in the building until her dad switched the route they were walking in and thought it was okay to get the older man's attention.

“Hello, coach Washijo is still working my students to the core, I see,” Haru says as he approaches closer to the coach and his team; they all seem too fixated on the person behind him.

“Well, how else do you think the team will get to the championships if they're not pushed to their limits? I'm not here to babysit. I'm here to train winners,” Coach Washijo said, already getting sidetracked on his plans for the team. While that conversation took place, it gave the team a chance to look at Kitana, and they were perplexed by how attractive she was. Her hair was pulled back in very neat flat braids that exposed her beautiful face with moles and freckles scattered, lips perfectly full with gloss coating them. Dressed in a light grey zip-up hoodie and grey-fit seamless athletic shorts that exposed her smooth brown legs glistening in the sun gathered the majority of the attention from the boys and the people passing by. The only gaze Kitana did not mind was the captain, who was much cuter closer up. He had dark olive-brown hair, matching hazel-green eyes, and a stoic expression, which was pretty intimidating. He has a large, muscular yet lean build and is relatively tall. His eyes moved up and down Kitana's body thinking he was slick with his glances until he met Kitana’s, who was already looking at him. She caught his eyes before making sure he knew she was slowly checking him out and gave out a dimpled smile when a blush formed on his face, which caused him to look away.

“Sensi Kai, are you gonna introduce us to the foreigner hottie that's behind you,” a voice said that pulled Kitana out of her trance, and her eye zeroed on the tall red-headed boy thats she could automatically tell had a goofy vibe about him, that just automatically made her laugh; her dad’s face turning completely red didn't help anything.

“ Satori, I would appreciate it if you reframed from using any of those unrefined comments on my daughter,'' Haru said, responding Grimley to Tendo, who also received a solicited glare from his couch.

“Well, daddy is not like he lied about me being hot cause I am most definitely not a foreigner but thank you, though,” Kitana responded in Japanese, which put the team in a state of shock that brought a deep belly laugh from the coach which was a lot more shocking than anything. This was the first time they heard it, and the man barely smiled.

“Kitana,” her dad said, not liking the sound of his daughter expressing how she looked hot, especially to these little foul-mind boys. Kitana looked away for a second to escape the glare her dad was making sure to give her, and the boy that misspoke received the same glare from his coach, to which he automatically apologized.

“And Tendo, one more word out of you, the whole team will be running another extra lap,” the coach said, which had the rest of the team looking at the redhead, daring him to say another word out of pocket.

“No need, it's fine, I'm not offended at all,” Kitana says, trying to get the heat off of him and the attention back to her, on which she succeeded because there the boys go again, checking her out. She didn't, especially from the green-eyed boy that was just carefully observing her with a slightly intimidating reactionless manner about her. Like he was disinterested in this whole ordeal and was wasting time.

“Anyways, this is my daughter Kitana. She just came from America today and will stay with me until she graduates. The funny thing is, my baby is also an amazing volleyball player, with a lot of champions under her belt,’’ Haru said, beaming with an endless amount of pride, causing Kitana to shield herself from the embarrassment of her dad always bringing this topic up in front of people.

“Really, in what position” the old man's coach said, not convinced that a person of Kitana's small-statured was a remotely great player. She didn’t like being doubted by anyone and was already catching an attitude.

“Yes, really, I was captain of my team before the move as a setter, but I was occasionally a spiker, and I can assure you that my dad isn’t wrong; I’m a winner and am the best at what I do,” Kitana said looking at the grumpy old ass old man with her arms crossed in a challenging way.

“Well, in that case, why don't you join us for practice today.”The other younger coach said, intervening before anything else could be said between them. Kitana wanted to decline because she didn’t prove herself to these men, but her dad beat her to a response.

“She’d love to. I have a few things to grab inside from my class anyways so you can join them, hon” Giving her a little forehead kiss and pushing her towards the group before leaving her with a wave.

“Well, I’m joining you guys for a minute. Let's see how great you are,'' Kitana says, turning her attention back to the team and giving them a dimpled smile that made most of them weak in the knees. They all filled into the colossal gym and started getting paired off for warm-ups and passing drills, and Kitana got paired off to number eight on the team. A first-year boy that was kind of adorable. He looked about 5’11 with a medium build, and his most notable attribute was the back bowl cut that he was wearing. He introduced himself with a fit of stutters as she took her jacket off, revealing the grey backless sports bra she was wearing underneath,also revealing the tattoo placed on her spine near her neck were two koi fish in Ying -Yang and going down the spine in Japanese Kanji had the saying “ a montage of love”. Kitana was big on tattoos, other than the one on her back she had a vine of flowers under her left under boob. Two butterfly tattoos on her head that she shared with a friend and the back of her right ear two small tattoos of the sun and the moon with tiny stars.

“I-um,’’ He squeaks when he tries to speak, so he clears his throat before restarting, “Goshiki!” he says so loud, sticking his hand out that all the other boys were snickering because of it, Specially that red-headed one from earlier.

Kitana rolled her eyes at them and shook his hand. “Well, hello, Goshiki, I don’t know if you heard earlier, but I’m Kitana. It’s nice to meet you. Looks like I’m your practice partner for today’’ She says, smiling up at him, causing him to blush. Seeing a pretty girl this up close that smelled amazing and had the potential to be a great volleyball player was the highlight of his week.

He stood there for a second just taking her in without blinking. “ Are you good in there my guy” she says, laughing a little, taking him out of his trance, getting a little closer with the ball in hand.

“Umm- yeah, yes I’m good, I just thought your tattoo is pretty cool. Did it hurt? Wait, did your dad allow you to get that? Are those the only ones you have? I’m sorry I’m asking too many questions.” Goshiki replied nervously, fingers running through his bangs,panicking inside a little, believing that the questions were a little intrusive to her. But he was just curious, no one he knew had a tattoo. Usually the people are very discreet, with keeping there’s hidden. but here’s this girl, not caring, having her back out in display with it, decorating her spine, which all just made her a whole lot more appealing than she already does.

It seems to be that the other players were in agreement with his internal thoughts, with her facing him. He’s able to catch them, with they’re envious sneaking peeks.Tendo, wasn’t even trying to hide it . All a bit shocked by her back exterior. Even the coaches.

“ No, you’re good, I don't mind the questions. Yes, my dad knows, about it he’s the one that paid for it as a birthday present and my overall accomplishments. But since I was 17 getting it, I needed my grandparents permission. I can’t lie,Yes, it hurts a bit. And also yes, I have three other more” she says, giving the ball a little dribble.

“Really?? where are they” He says catching the ball passed to his eyes spreading all over her body to see the different inks.

“Well they’re in secret places, can’t really show unless you want to get really close and personal” she says teasingly this boy was easy. His cheeks started to get red and flustered.

“ It's a joke, what position do you play?”

“I’m a winged spiker, but I will take Ushijima's spot and be the ace of this team,” Goshiki says excitedly, starting the passing drill with the ball where they pass to themselves at first and then backward pass to their partner.

“Winged spiker, okay, we love to see it. I was one alsoe; I still am, actually, but I’m a setter for most of my games. Since you're not the ace, who’s this Ushijma that is' ' Kitana says while hitting her pass backward.

“Shirt # 1, he's the captain of our team. He plays as a wing spiker and is the team's ace. He was the number one ace in Miyagi Prefecture and ranked among the country's top three aces.,” Goshiki says, catching the ball, head nodding towards the direction of the net where there was a three-person practice happening with striking, which involved the talkative red-head who was #5, #10 who seemed to be lecturing him about something, and then # 1 who turned out to be the fine ass stoic guy who she was checking out, now she was continuing to do.

“ We’ll dame he’s pretty hardcore, skill level is amazing too, and kinda cute is he in a relationship” Kitana said not one to beat around the bush when she wants something, and for right now, her eyes were set on the captain.

“Cute??” Goshiki says almost missing the ball, in which he had hit the receive harder than he should have,perplexed by the words that just came out of her mouth, and her boldness.Ironically the ball ending up near the foot of ushijima.

#haikyuu smut #haikyuu!!#black main character #ushijima #daichi miura #coach ukai #kuroo tetsurou #oikawa tōru #kotaro bokuto #love #miya osamu #miya atsumu #Karasuno #shiratorizawa

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