#i can only give a half decent attempt at writing this when im in the mood to write it otherwise it sucks like this does
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laswells-ashtray · 5 days ago
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when are we getting more sesbian lex 😪😪
Sarah had to appreciate how loose-limbed drinking made Kate. The typically stern, tight-shouldered woman would sink into their bedsheets, her hair haloing her face as she let her eyes slip closed.
The bottle they'd decided to polish off earlier was good for them, it'd been a long week and they were both stressed beyond belief. But with Kate lying back against the bed, a pillow under her hips as Sarah's t-shirt sat just above her hips? Sarah had to appreciate how good she had it, face buried in her wife's wet cunt.
Especially with how Kate was trying to cant her hips up and ride her face.
They'd both been so busy recently, they hadn't had the chance to actually be together. And God, if she hadn't missed it.
Her hands were pinning Kate's legs open, fingers digging into the meat of her thighs as the woman below her let out a pleased hum as Sarah nosed at her clit, teasing and gentle. They had all the time in the world.
Kate was wearing her old Jurassic Park t-shirt, faded from years of wear and there was a pair of ratty, grey sweatpants somewhere on their bedroom floor. They were relaxed and cosy.
She feels the shift in weight as Kate pushes herself up on her elbows, glancing down at her with a look that's almost unbearably fond.
"You sure you don't want me to-"
"Lie back down."
Kate fists the duvet as she falls back against it, nails digging into the thick, plush material of the comforter as she tries to halfheartedly push against Sarah's hands pinning her thighs.
Sarah was more than content to lie between her wife's legs, dragging her tongue through the other woman's folds and sucking on her clit until it edged on just this side of too much for the woman below her.
She hums and pretends not to enjoy how the vibrations against Kate's throbbing clit leave her clenching around nothing, barely giving the blonde a second to recover before thrusting her tongue into the wet hole in front of her, lapping at her cunt like she owed Kate money.
She'd been at it for far longer than Kate usually would've let her away with, slow and tender. Her chin was soaked and the Kate's blonde curls were damp with slick and spit.
"Fucking finally."
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offbranddrpepsi · 3 years ago
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the ask bout the gn reader asking 2 sleep w/ agents for the 1st time…could you plz write more of that? w/ fade, jett, killjoy, neon, reyna & skye? if that’s 2 many ppl, you don’t have to write em all! thx in advance, no matter what!!!
absolutely! i finally found a decent pic to use for skye so here we go
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Fade was the absolute best when it came to communication. You? not so much. More often than not she would have to pry to figure out what it was you were trying to tell her or what was eating at you that made it hard to speak. Which made your current predicament all the more anxiety inducing.
Fade sat in her office, applying henna as she normally did once her previous ones wore off. You had shuffled into her office a while ago, trying to work up your courage while you played on you phone. Your girlfriend hummed as she worked, enjoying mutually doing nothing with you.
"Hey dea-" you started only to be cut off. "wait for my henna to dry then we can." you were a tad bit shocked, your partner raising her eyebrows at you. "you've been worrying about it for the past three days, i was waiting to see if you could resolve it yourself." "Seriously, you knew the entire time?" You asked with a loud sigh, hating that you got worried enough for her to notice. "Yes, now give me an hour and we can go back to my room. Maybe i could put some henna on you once we are done?"
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Jett was the definition of loud and hyperactive so you knew good and well she was down when ever you were. She did deeply respect your personal choice but also reassured you often that the moment you said the word she would drop what she was doing to accommodate your wants. It was important to note she didn't have much experience but still wanted to make your first time together worth it as well as not seem as much of a big deal as many made it out to be.
So here the two of you sat, a tangle of limbs as she played some game and you browsed through your socials.
"Hey Jett question," You started, face starting to turn red as you fully engaged in your phone. "um you know how you always say you are 'down if im down'?"
"Uh, yeah?" she looked at you confused as she paused her game.
"w-would you be down now?" your voice was nearly a mumble but you managed to squeeze the question out. Looking up from your phone as she had yet to respond you were suddenly caught off guard as you were near tackled, a pair of overly excited lips meeting your own as the wind got knocked out of you.
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Killjoy rarely thought about sex so she had never brought up wanting to have it to you. This caused you to half think she didn't want to have it with you at all, causing worries to cloud your head when ever you thought about it. It had taken weeks for you to even work up the courage to attempt to ask her thoughts on it, sadly it didn't quite come out right.
"Klara would you have sex with me?" you asked rather bluntly and quickly, wanting to get it over with.
"I mean i typically wouldn't have sexual relations in my workshop but if you are game i suppose i can manage." She responded not even lifting her head to look at you, still buried in her work.
Your face flushed red in embarrassment, she had taken it a bit to literally. "Oh- um i um didn't mean right now i meant overall unless you want to right now then im game." Your girlfriend starting snorting as she laughed, setting down her tools to avoid dropping them. At least you were aware she was in fact interested in that level of intimacy with you.
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Your electrified partner was always incredibly cautious when it came to any physical affection, not wanting to shock the shit out of you by accident. It had nearly escaped your mind several times but you did wonder what it would be like to sleep with her, if it would be as shocking as she claimed. However, you were incredibly awkward and didn't exactly have the courage to out right ask. You waited and waited, trying to find the perfect moment to pop the question.
Sitting at Neon's desk you worked on some sketch while she sat back in bed. Deciding to try to be subtle and not just ask her to fuck outright you looked over to her. "Neon would you be surprised if i said i was okay with being shocked a little bit if it meant touching more?" The question sounded innocent and well it kind of was, you really didn't mind a lil zap here or there.
"Uh," she said loudly, dragging the sound out much to your dismay. "I would still feel bad if i shocked you, maybe we can start small and work our way up?" That was a decent suggestion, the only downside would be waiting even longer to sleep with her which you didn't mind but you did want to make your wants clear to her.
"Okay that sounds fine, i would like to get started on that right away though." You went to turn around but were stopped by a sudden question from your lover. "Why? if there something you want specifically or?"
You had a feeling she may have been on to you. Swallowing the lump in your throat you decided to respond as honestly as possible, "Well yes, i guess, i kind of want to be more intimate with you eventually if you know what i mean."
With a nod the only response you got was, "Oh, okay cool me too, we can work on that". You were very fortunate your partner was over all very chill about everything and had such a lax attitude.
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To say Reyna was affectionate was an understatement, to say she was a massive tease was a very accurate one. She knew how awkward you were, how utterly shy you got when it came to sexual things, and the woman loved to poke at it. Often her teasing end with you being a red mess, hiding your face in her chest or under a blanket, but not today. Today you decided to be bold when your partner started her usual teasing, taking her up on her playful offers. "Oh my darling i could just eat you up," She teased from beside you in bed, stroking your side lovingly. "All laid out and adorable" "Well why don't you then," you had your face half buried in a pillow and your voice cracked mid way through but you accomplished you mission, your heart pounding at your victory. Reyna titled her head at you, obviously caught of guard by the sudden response. Before you new it she had pounced, fully ready to do exactly as she said she would.
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Skye was incredibly upfront and blunt about near everything which made it very had to work up the courage to ask her to have sex with you. The two of you had been together for a while and she had mentioned it but had never really out right asked you, which made this all the more difficult. On top of that she was a very busy woman who couldn't stay in one place very long, reducing your total chances to even ask by a lot.
Having the sudden courage, or maybe it was the fact you were too tired from working out to feel your anxiety building yet, you thought to just ask her now and get it over with.
"Skye would you like to sleep together?" the wording wasn't your best, you were also very breathless so that just made it worse.
The woman just looked at you for a moment, her expression caught between confusion and looking at you like you just asked a dumb question. Slowly she responded, "Um I don't think right here is really a good place or time love?" Looking down you cursed out your self and let out a shaky sigh, "I-i didn't mean right here i've been trying to ask sorry I'm tired." You were wrapped up in a hug as she softly laughed in relief, "Okay then how about we get cleaned up, hydrate and eat then get to business yeah?" You gave her an enthusiastic nod and started your walk back to the base, slightly more excited for Skye's cooking and resting more than anything else.
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somnambulants · 3 years ago
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Can i request readerxnatasha first time? All good if you don't write smut though xx
she’s the sunset in the west
word count: 1.7K notes: i kinda combined this with another prompt: "intertwining your hands with your lover while making love" bc im feeling v soft today lmao hope you enjoy!  warnings: allusions to lack of bodily autonomy/coerced interactions. 
minors pls don’t interact! 18+ only!
Sex has always been a weapon for her.
Natasha knows she can get whatever she wants from whoever she wants if she just flaunts herself in front of them enough to get their attention. She’s not naïve; her whole life has been set up for her to use her body to get what she wants.
It’s something they teach you in the red room from the time you can walk: your body is your biggest weapon. No one will anticipate you coming.  
And it’s true. 
No one ever sees her coming. 
Natasha has walked into many rooms and turned many heads and managed to take out multiple targets with all eyes on her and without anyone batting those eyes because they were so distracted by her.
It’s where the term black widow comes from. You see her but you don’t see her.
And that’s how she lives her life, with people seeing her but not seeing her. It’s what makes her such a good spy; such a good assassin. People might know she’s dangerous from the second they see her but they’ll be dead and she’ll be long gone before they realise exactly just how dangerous.
No one seems to see through it.
Until she meets you.
You, who met her while she was half naked and soaking wet, everything on display, after a mission had gone slightly wrong and didn’t even blink twice as you shrugged off your own jacket and handed it to her with a kind smile while some of her own teammates struggled to keep their eyes to themselves.
She’s pretty sure she fell in love with you right then and there, with your eyes on the ground, pointedly averted, a faint pink flush staining both of your cheeks and crawling down your neck.
--
Your relationship with Natasha is great. Amazing, in fact. You don’t think you could ask for better or more.
There’s just one thing really.
Sometimes you don’t feel like she’s really there when you’re being intimate. In the moment. Sometimes it’s as though she’s going through the motions and just doing what she feels needs to be done. Or what she thinks you want her to do.
Like right now.
She’s kissing you like she’s on autopilot. You love kissing her and you’re enjoying it, no doubt about that, as you sit splayed across her lap with her arms around you like a cage. 
 You love it. And her.
It just doesn’t feel quite right. 
You know, subconsciously, there must be a reason you’ve been dating for all these months and haven’t had sex yet. You know Natasha has had a lot of sex and you’re not exactly inexperienced yourself in that department.
And yet, every time you get close, she’ll suddenly push you away and make an excuse to leave. 
You know there must be a reason. You just don’t know why or how to broach the subject with her. 
Or you thought you didn’t.
“Why don’t you want to have sex?”
You don’t mean for it to slip out and you cover your mouth as soon as it does, but the damage is already done.
Below you, Natasha, hands still on your waist – at a perfectly decent height, as though she thinks your parents might walk in and catch you at any second – freezes and looks at you with wide eyes.
“I – I do,” she says after a second, stuttering a little over her words. It would be amusing in any other circumstance to see Natasha Romanoff, the most unflappable person you’ve ever met in your life, struggling for words.
You stare at her until she swallows and looks away from you. “I do,” she repeats, quiet in a way that is distinctly non-Natasha like. “I’m just not used to this.”
It doesn’t make sense to you, what she’s saying but you stay quiet, sensing she’s building up to something and not wanting to interrupt her when it seems like she’s opening up to you about something important.
“I don’t know how to do …,” she waves a hand in between you wordlessly. You know you must look as confused as you feel because she lets out a huff of frustration. “I don’t know. This –It’s hard. For me. To do this with someone I care about.”
She looks so defeated as the words leave her mouth. You suck in a breath as realisation starts to sink in, feeling nauseous at the implication you’re getting from what she’s just said.
“We don’t have to do anything, Nat, ” you say quietly, tilting your head so she has to look at you as you speak. “Not now. Not ever…. if that’s not something you want. I’m sorry if I --”
“No! No!” she interrupts. She seems to have pinpointed where your thoughts have gone and she leans in, looking at you seriously. “No. Of course I want to. I just don’t know how…I’m used to..”
She doesn’t have to finish. You know exactly what she means and for a second, you’re overcome with such vibrant anger at the thought that no one has ever treated her the way she deserves.
You want to make sure she never feels like that again.
“Okay,” you say slowly, as a plan formulates in your head. You’re not sure if it’s the right thing to do but Natasha is looking at you uncertainly, like she thinks you’re going to up and run at any minute so you have to act fast. “Okay, if you’re sure. Can I try something? Please?”
Still looking uncertain, Natasha nods straight away. You lean in to kiss her gently and she immediately reciprocates, pulling you closer, deepening the kiss as though you’ll pull away at any moment.
After you break the kiss, you slide off her lap and then off the couch all together, kneeling down so you’re in front of her.
There’s confusion in her eyes as you do but you don’t address it until you’re settled.
You place your hands on her thighs. “Tell me to stop, okay?” The if you’re uncomfortable goes unsaid but you know she must be able to see it written across your face because she nods, biting her lip.
Hands still on her thighs, you kiss every spot you can reach and are delighted as she lets out a little laugh.
Encouraged, you continue until you reach her thighs.
Watching her carefully, you shift, helping her out of her underwear and pulling it down her legs. As you do, she looks back at you evenly, a little smile now playing around the corners of her mouth.
Internally, you breathe a sigh of relief. This was the right move then. You’re sure of it now. 
This is the most relaxed you’ve seen her like this, you think. You hate that you hadn’t noticed any of this earlier.
But at least, you can do your best from now on by knowing what to look for.
You move your hands, and seeming to read your mind, she meets you in the middle, letting you intertwine your fingers on either side of her thighs as you rest your head on her stomach, watching her for any signs that she isn’t as comfortable with this as she seems. “Okay?”
You can’t see anything in her eyes to indicate it isn’t but still, you wait until she nods, giving you the green light. 
“Yeah,” she says, as you lean back down. Her hips buck a little at the first touch of your tongue against her and she lets out a little breath, biting her lip as she looks at you with darkened eyes: “Yes.”
You continue, encouraged by her little moans and sounds that she makes no attempt to stifle, wasting little time detaching one of your hands to press a finger into her and inhaling sharply as you feel how wet she is around you.
Your actions are rewarded with a moan that quicky turns into a high-pitched gasp as you add another finger quickly after.
You thrust into her, picking up speed as she moans, shoving her hips onto your fingers eagerly in a plaintive request for more. She gets louder as you add a third and you feel her stretch around you. Louder still, when you brush over her clit with your thumb. 
“Okay?” you ask again, a little teasingly. No doubt hearing it, she glares down at you but can’t quite hide the smile on her face, pushing her hips up to meet your fingers.
The smile quickly crumbles in favor of a small cry as you thrust into her harder. Her eyes flutter a little and she bites down on her lower lip. “So okay.”
With your fingers now inside her, you turn your attention to her clit, laving your tongue with it and trying not to grin when she cries out, squeezing you so tightly it’s hard for you to keep going at the pace you are.
She squeezes your hand, digging her nails into your skin as her thighs lock around your head and keep you in place.
In response, you double your efforts and are rewarded as she starts to fall apart above you. 
There’s blissful white noise in your head as she arches her back with a moan – filthier and louder than the rest, as she comes -- cutting off your air supply entirely to the point that you wouldn’t be surprised if you blacked out.
You wouldn’t mind. In fact, you think this would be the best possible way to go.
When she finally releases you, you stay where you are, ignoring the cramp in your legs and rest your head on her stomach again, gazing up at her as she comes down, still twitching occasionally.
She runs her free hand through your hair rhythmically as her chest rises and falls, trying to catch her breath. 
She looks like, for lack of better words, a mess. Hair sticking to her neck, cheeks flushed. She’s still wearing her bra, but the straps are now falling down, off her shoulders.
You think you probably don’t look any better yourself.
She’s so beautiful you think you could stare at her for the rest of your life and not get bored.
You squeeze the hand you’re still holding and her eyes flutter open, meeting yours immediately. “All good?” you ask softly.
She lets out an incredulous sounding little huff, pulling you up so you’re in her lap and she can kiss you.
You moan as she licks the taste of herself off your lips.
“Very much good,” she says, playfully, when you pull apart to breathe for a second.
She kisses you again, deeper and more intensely before shoving you away and reversing your positions. “Your turn.”
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thebluesideofmyworld · 3 years ago
Text
A Good Guy - A Solangelo One-Shot
Summary: Will might be a lot of things. And among those things, Will would dare to say that he’s a good guy. But when it came to Nico di Angelo, would he ever be good enough, though?
Word count: 3900 words || Rating: Teenage and Up Audiences || Read on AO3
Notes:
1. Based on the song "good guys" by LANY 2. My contribution for @after-everything-pjo-zine project. Check out other fics (each fic is accompanied by great fanart so you just HAVE to check it out) in the zine here.
***
Will might be a lot of things. And among those things, Will would dare to say that he’s a good guy. And he would proudly say that it’s because his family raised him to be one. His Mama made sure that he never forgot to say please, sorry and thank you, and his grandma taught him to respect people. Even though Apollo wasn’t around to be an ideal father as Will was growing up in Tennessee, his grandpa showed him how to be a Southern gentleman.
So yeah, he might come across as a young man who with a sassy attitude. But heck, Will knew that he was a good guy. And he’s proud of that.
But here’s the thing. Here’s a thing about being a good guy. Being a good guy might sound like it’s a good thing to do. But being a good guy also sometimes meant that you’re almost as invisible as a wallflower. Because even though you’re good, there were always be better guys. And one thing that Will learned about being a good guy? Good guys never win.
***
“It’s been almost two weeks, you know,” Will said as he kept his eyes at the monthly medical report that he (pretended) to be reading.
“Two weeks since what?” Kayla asked, but didn't bother to pretend that she's actually interested.
“Since Nico went for that quest, remember? Something about Persephone’s parrot or something?” Will said, still trying to keep his eyes at the notes. Because he knew that Kayla might still see the worry in Will’s eyes. (Sometimes it’s almost scary, how his siblings knew him too well).
“Oh? Really? Has it been two weeks yet?”
“Almost,” Will said, decided to leave the detail that it’s actually has been 11 days and since Nico had left the camp early in the morning and now it was almost dinner, it’s been almost twelve freaking days since Nico left the camp for that stupid quest.
“I mean, of course, it might be nothing but well, I thought it was supposed to be a short, simple quest?” Will continued. “Usually if it’s just this small quest, it never took him this long before. Usually it would just be like, three days, five, at the most, and like, a week if he took a detour to impulsively do something unnecessary, but never this long.”
Will lifted his head and turned to look at Kayla, who didn’t seem to share the same worry as Will. Her eyes were still fixed on the glossy pictures of the magazine that she was looking at. A non-committal hum coming from her was the only sign that she was (kind of) listening.
Will tried to focus on the lines of writing in front of him, but the letters were all jumbled and he couldn’t make himself try to read anything. His mind was too busy thinking about different reasons and scenarios of why Nico wasn’t back yet from the quest.
“Do you think I should ask Chiron about it? Probably he’s heard from Nico, y’know. Like, maybe something came up and I don’t know, maybe Chiron knew or maybe even Rachel got a vision or something, or-“
“Or you could have just contacted me, Solace. Pretty sure that it doesn't hurt to try IM me”
Will stood up and spun to face the direction where the voice was coming from. He did it so fast, he got dizzy because of it. It took him two seconds before his eyes could fully focus on Nico di Angelo, who was staring at him. His face looked nonchalant, but his eyes glinted with amusement.
“Uh, hey,” Will greeted, gripping the desk as he suddenly needed to get a hold of himself. “You’re back.”
Nico gave him a single nod, brushing away some strands of hair from covering his eyes. “Yep. I just got back.” He shrugged his shoulders before continuing. “Thought I’d drop by here before I report to Chiron.”
Will tightened his grip on the desk, trying his best to hold himself from closing the distance between him and Nico just to pull Nico into his arms.
“And uh… What brings you here?”
The emotional part of him wished that he was the reason why Nico came straight to the infirmary after the quest. But the rational part of him shushed him. That damned rational part of him told him that hey, it was him who wanted to see Nico, not the other way around.
Nico kept his eyes at Will and there was something in those dark eyes that Will couldn’t really put his fingers on.
“I thought you wanted me to have a check-up every time I got back from a quest?”
Of course.
Will tried to ease the dull pain in his heart by giving Nico a small smile. “Yeah. Of course. Need to make sure that you won’t fade into the shadows again, huh?” Will let out a nervous chuckle. “I mean, I am your doctor, and a doctor only wants the best for his patients.”
This time Nico stayed silent as he nodded. Will gestured to a nearby cot with his chin.
“Now, if you could just sit down over there, please?”
Still saying nothing, Nico strode to the cot and quickly sat there. Will took a deep breath, mentally telling himself to be professional, and let it out in a long exhale. He made his way to where Nico was waiting for him.
The check-up was a regular one. And there was nothing new about how touching Nico made stupid butterflies do some stupid dancing in his stomach. He ached to ask Nico questions about what happened in the quest and why it took so long. He wanted to know whether Nico ever thought of him while he was on the quest the way Will kept on thinking about him while he was away. He wanted to listen to Nico talk to him, with that slight accent that made his voice so melodious, almost like he was singing.
But it would only scare Nico away.
So he kept his eyes at the board where he jotted down the notes about Nico’s vitals.
“So, uhm… This quest was a bit longer than usual, huh?” Will asked, almost proud of himself that his voice sounded normal.
Nico hummed as he put his jacket back on. “Yeah, we had an unexpected encounter with some empousai. Luckily, David is unexpectedly good at fighting.”
At the mention of the name, Will lifted his head up. “David? You mean the new camper? That Athena kid?”
Nico nodded. “Yeah. For someone who never held a sword before, I have to say that I’m impressed.”
A strange, nauseating heat flared inside Will’s stomach. “Really?”
“Yup. In fact, I promised to give him an extra lesson in sword-fighting tomorrow.”
That strange heat swirled even more inside Will. He stretched his lips into a lame attempt to smile at Nico.
“Oh,” Will said. “Nice.”
“In one way, he strangely reminded me of Percy, you know? The way he held his sword.” And Nico continued talking for a while about that stupid new guy. Will listened, humming every now and then just to show Nico that he’s listening.
Half of his mind wished that the harpies would find that David kid to be a nice target for their dinner. The other half of his mind scowled at him for having that kind of evil wish.
“Okay. Everything looks good. Just make sure that you drink enough water,” Will said as he wrote the date and signed his name on the bottom part of the report.
“So I can go now?”
Will nodded. “Yeah, you’re free to go now,” he answered as he walked back to his desk to put the record in the folder.
“And you’re not even offering to walk me back to my Cabin like a good Southern gentleman?”
Will spun on his heel quickly. He stared at Nico with wide eyes, thinking that he might have been hallucinating.
“What?”
Nico snorted and slid down from the cot. “Never mind. I need to report to Chiron first anyway.”
Will blinked, and it took him a full two seconds before he had his voice again.
“Nico-“
But Nico was already one step away from the door. He stopped and looked at Will over his shoulder. The left tip of his lips curled up, just slightly, forming a ghost of a smile. He gave a two-finger salute to Will.
“I’ll see you around, Solace.”
Not waiting for Will to answer him, Nico stepped away. And just like that, he’s out of sight.
Will stared at the open door. There is this hollowness inside his heart that he couldn't explain. Like he just missed a chance.
He always thought that he’s a good guy. Or at least, he’s trying to.
But would he ever be good enough, though?
***
“What are you doing here?”
Lou Ellen’s voice startled Will.
“Me? Uh…” Will scrambled to pick up the book that he just dropped and showed it to Lou, like he was trying to prove something. “I was reading!”
Lou Ellen stared at him with a glint of amusement in her eyes as she gave Will the Look. The ‘don’t-give-me-bullshit’ Look.
“What, am I not allowed to read in peace?” Will said, a bit defensively.
“Hey, it’s cool dude,” Lou said. “In fact, it was nice to see you somewhere else aside from the infirmary,” she added.
Will relaxed a bit, going back to lean his back on the tree.
“I can see why you choose this spot. It’s much quieter than the infirmary on your busy days,” Lou said.
Will hummed.  His eyes flickered to the far left, to the clearing a few yards away, just for a split second before he opened his book.
“And the view from here is also… decent.”
Lou Ellen’s tone made Will quickly look up again at the daughter of Hecate. She’s now grinning at him, like she just figured something out.
“How long have you been spying on those two?” Lou asked, gesturing with her chin to two demigods in the clearing who seemed to just finished sparring.
Will gaped at her. He blinked and quickly shook his head. “What? No! I’ve told you, I was reading here!”
But Lou Ellen didn’t seem to care about Will’s reaction as she waved at the demigods in the clearing.
“Hey, Nico! David!”
Will’s eyes widened in horror this time as he turned his head around, only to see that Nico and the new Athena kid walked towards them.
“Lou!” he hissed in annoyance.
Lou Ellen just gave him a teasing smirk. “What?”
Will groaned and quickly stood up, his book abandoned on the grass as he unconsciously ran a hand over his wild locks.
“Hey,” Nico greeted. “What’s up?”
Nothing’s up aside from his heartbeat, Will would like to answer. But of course, he kept it to himself as he tried his best to school his face into a relaxed, nonchalant, I’m-just-chilling-here expression.
“Nothing much,” Lou Ellen shrugged her shoulders. “You two are sparring together here? Why? Is the arena too mainstream for you?”
The new Athena kid gave a half-smile as he brushed off some hair from covering his eyes. “It was my request, actually,” he said. “I just want to have a...” he waved his right in a vague circular motion, like trying to find the exact word to say. “A more… realistic view when fighting a monster?”
That didn’t really make sense to Will. But it seemed to be an acceptable reason for Lou Ellen as she nodded at him.
“And has Nico been a good teacher for you?” Lou Ellen asked.
Will didn’t miss the way Lou gave him a quick glance.
David’s half-smile turned into a full one. “He is!” He turned his head to Nico and smiled at him, like he was pleased at Nico. “Thanks for teaching me, Nico. You are very good at sword-fighting.”
Nico returned David’s smile with one of his small smiles. A smile that could have filled Will’s chest with warm air. But since he’s not at the receiving end of that smile, it turned Will’s chest into lead instead.
“Anytime. It was a pleasure.”
“You will teach me more, yes? And ah… We also need to talk more. About football.”
This was the first time for Will to really listen to David talking, and he couldn’t help but notice how David’s voice had quite an accent. Especially when he pronounced football, the way he stretched some syllables.
Nico’s face lit up. “Yeah! We should! I know that Cecil played football! Right?” His eyes darted from Will to Lou Ellen, like asking for confirmation.
“Cecil? He does. I can take you to talk to him. Come on,” Lou Ellen quickly pulled the sleeve of David’s shirt and led him away from the other two demigods.
Will watched the backs of Lou Ellen and David who were walking away from them. He could feel nervousness starting to creep in on him as their voices slowly faded away, as he realized that he’s now alone with Nico.
Not that he hated to be with Nico. It’s just… this wasn’t his plan. He wasn’t prepared. And Will hated it when things didn’t go as he planned. He hated it when he was unprepared.
“David played football,” Nico said just when David and Lou Ellen disappeared from their sight.
Will angled his neck to look at Nico. “And when you said football, did you mean soccer?”
“I mean football,” Nico answered, turning on his heels a little so now he was facing Will. “The real football.”
Will snorted and slid down to sit on the grass. “They’re the same,” he said, leaning his back on the tree.
Nico followed Will, sitting on the grass. “It will always be football for me,” he said. There was a melancholic tone lacing his voice. And it made Will wonder, maybe it’s something that Nico used to play. In the streets in Venice, when he was just a kid who had no idea that Greek gods and goddesses were real.
“We, David and I, we were talking about playing here. I mean, it would be great, you know? David said he played midfield. I’m usually,” Nico paused, but quickly continued. “I mean, I used to play as a striker. If we can connect well, that would be really cool.”
Will closed his eyes while his stomach churned with a strange, unpleasant feeling. So, not only was this David kid good in sword-fighting, he’s good in soccer too?
“Do you play too? I mean, you can be the goal keeper. I guess you would be great. I mean, you’re tall and it would be a great asset for a goalkeeper.”
Will huffed. Stuck between the goalposts while watching Nico and David scoring goals? Yeah. No, thank you.
“We’ll see about that,” Will said, still with his eyes closed.
For a while, none of them said anything. Will opened his eyes when he heard Nico sighed. He turned his head, watching Nico stand up. Nico brushed his pants, and gave Will a small smile.
“I’ll see you around, Solace.”
Will wondered why that smile looked a bit strained, but returned it anyway. “Yeah. I’ll see you around.”
He watched as Nico walked away.
Someone would be a good guy for Nico, he thought. And even though Will was a good guy, maybe he just wasn’t good enough. So of course, someone would be a good guy for Nico. Someone else. Not Will.
***
Will didn’t even know why he was here, standing awkwardly near the table where the food and drinks were.
Oh, yes. Because Cecil and Lou Ellen practically dragged him here, to this stupid Halloween party organized by the Aphrodite Cabin.
It’s not that Will disliked Halloween. And it wasn’t like he hated Halloween parties either. What he didn’t like, was seeing Nico talking with David at the other corner of the room. Just looking at the sight made a strange, nauseating fire flame inside of him.
“Pining over di Angelo again?” Lou Ellen nudged him on his shoulder.
“Yeah. How long are you going to act like this Will? Playing it cool while we all know how you wish you’re the one talking to di Angelo instead of David?” Cecil joined Lou Ellen in interrogating Will.
Will only rolled his eyes. “I don’t know what you guys are talking about,” he mumbled, and took another sip of Coke from his cup. He tried to watch the campers who were dancing in the middle of the floor. Some kids from the Hermes cabin somehow got a hold of speakers. And of course, with a little help from the Hephaestus kids, the party had a cool sound system that was now playing pop music.
Lou Ellen sighed. Will stole another glance at where Nico was standing. David was leaning a little to whisper something at Nico. The proximity between those two made it a little bit harder for Will to breathe. He wondered what it was that David was telling Nico. But then Nico turned his head to Will. And no matter how cliché it might sound, Will’s heart skipped a beat when their eyes met. Will quickly looked down to the floor.
Next to him, Lou Ellen clicked her tongue.
“You know what? I can’t take this anymore. It’s been MONTHS. This has got to end tonight,” she said. Ignoring Will’s protest, she grabbed Will’s wrist and pulled him along with her, walking towards Nico and David.
A few seconds later, Will was standing with a flustered face in front of Nico and David.
“Hey, Nico, David! You guys enjoying the party?”
David gave that half-smile again. “Ah, yes. The party is nice.” He angled his neck just a bit so now he was looking right at Will. The half-smile subtly transformed into a knowing smirk. “And you? You… You are the healer, yes? Will?”
Will forced himself to smile politely at David. “Yeah. That’s me.”
David gave a single nod. “Nico talked a lot about you. A lot of good things.”
Will blinked. His eyes darted to Nico, but the raven-haired boy looked away from him. Still, his cheeks were a dark shade of red.
“Is that Cecil over there? I think I want to talk to him,” David suddenly said as he pointed at Cecil with his chin. “Lou Ellen? Come with me?”
Lou Ellen grinned as she nodded and made a 90-degree turn on her heels. “Yeah, come on, David. Let's leave these two idiots.”
And just like that, they left Will again, standing awkwardly less than two feet away from Nico.
“Uh… I didn’t expect to see you here,” Will said.
Nico turned his head at Will, an eyebrow slightly raised up. “Oh? I thought you were the one saying that I need to work on my social skill.”
Will gave Nico a small smile. “Yeah. So. Good to see you here, then. I mean, for your social skills and all.”
Nico stared at Will. And there was just something behind those dark eyes. Something that Will couldn’t put into words. Something that made him unable to look away.
“Aren’t you going to ask me to dance, Solace?”
The question got Will off-guard. Of all the questions in the world, it’s probably the most unexpected one.
“Huh?”
Nico held his eyes at Will’s for another second, but then he looked away. “Never mind,” he said, half-mumbling. His cheeks blushed again into dark cherry color.
“But… do you want to, though?”
Nico’s head turned back to Will. “Want to do what?”
“Dance? Do you…want to?”
Nico bit his lower lip and he looked down for a second. When he looked up back at Will, his charcoal eyes were soft.
“Depends.”
“On what?”
“On who’s asking me to.”
Will’s heart started to jump around in his chest.
“What if it’s me asking you?”
The eyes that were staring back at him were now smiling.
“Then I guess, it depends on the song, then.”
Will’s heart was probably doing some crazy somersaults right now, but his lips curled up without him even thinking about it.
“Well, it’s my favorite song that they’re playing right now. I hope it suits you?” he asked, carefully offering his hand.
Nico’s smile was as soft as the look in his eyes. And the moment their fingertips touched, Will’s heart soared high and suddenly his chest was filled with warm, light air.
As Will led Nico to the floor, he thought about how long he has been wanting to do this, to hold Nico’s hand in his.
They swayed along with the music. Nico’s left hand felt perfect in his right hand. Will’s left hand rested on Nico’s hip and Will couldn’t care less about the other people dancing around them.
“Your dancing is better than your singing,” Nico said, a playful smile on his lips.
Will chuckled. “My grandma said a real Southern gentleman must know how to dance. And I remember my Mama dancing with me when I was a kid.”
“Your Mam raised you well, I have to say.”
Will hummed. “I’m a good mama’s boy, I can promise you that.”
“I can see that, Will. Everyone can see that.”
“See what?”
“That you’re a good guy.”
This time Will held his eyes at Nico. “I try to be,” he said. “But… Would I ever be good enough for you?”
Nico huffed. “And you said I was the dense one.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean…” Nico stopped, but his feet kept on moving. He sighed. “Gods, do I really have to spell it out to you?” He asked, sounding exasperated as he looked away from Will.
Hope bloomed inside of Will and he grinned and oh, how he wanted to shout and laugh. He took his hand off Nico’s hip so he could gently cup Nico’s cheek, guiding him to face him back.
“Do you mean you like me?” Will asked.
“Well, do you like me?”
Will chuckled and he could feel a stupid smile creeping in. “Why do you even have to ask?”
Nico shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. Because you’re nice to me but you’re also nice to everyone? Because you don’t seem to care even if I talk about someone else? Because you…” Nico stopped again and shook his head. “I don’t know. Maybe because I just…don’t know?”
Will squeezed Nico’s hand just a bit tighter. “I was just… I was just afraid that I’m not good enough for you.”
Nico rolled his eyes. But his lips twitched, like he tried to hold back a smile.
“You’re a good guy, Will. You’re a good guy to everyone. But sometimes I hope that you can be my good guy.”
It’s like a thousand birds were singing inside of Will now as he felt like he was floating in this bubble of happiness.
“Then I’ll be yours, Death Boy.”
Will wrapped his arms around Nico, and pulled him into his embrace.
“I’ll be your good guy, then. I’ll be your everything.”
Nico pulled himself a little away from Will. He looked up at Will and the light in his eyes was like the most beautiful star in a dark night.
“Everything?”
“Everything. Anything you need.”
***
Additional Author's Notes: Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it :). Reblogs, replies or any other feedbacks are much appreciated. Also please don't forget to check out the zine!!!
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wizkiddx · 4 years ago
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Heey, first of all yeeah to 500 followers!! You deserve them 🎉 I was wondering if you still do the celebration and could write something for #2 neck kisses with Tom. Thanks and have an awesome day 😊
so sorry but i completely lost this in my inbox so sorry its so late!!!! also this is kinda a Father’s Day one too (except im half a week too late but hey ho)
summary: soon to be dad!tom predicts your babies gender
kissing prompts 2 = neck kisses
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Your day had been a pretty mundane one. Just a typical Saturday of getting shit done - involving cleaning the bathrooms and then putting a wash on. It was a set of jobs you'd normally share with your fiance, except he had been out golfing all day.
To be fair, he had earned himself the day off. Ever since you'd found out you were pregnant - the boy had barely let you lift a finger. Especially after you'd passed the 24 weeks landmark, now that the baby bump wasn't so much a bump, and more a fucking volcano sprouting out your belly.
For once the British weather was actually pretty decent, meaning you opened all the patio windows to allow the ribbons of golden light to stream into your living room. In your own little world, you stood by the table and hung up baby grows on the airer. Yes, it was a bit early to be laundering the baby's clothes, but both you and Tom couldn't help yourselves. Last week, when you went shopping for Nikki's birthday - instead the both of you had got distracted by the newborn section.
Tom made a quiet entrance into the house, so much so you hadn't noticed the door open as you softly hummed an old Beatles tune whilst reaching for the following soft grey striped onepiece.
He hadn't been in the best mood when walking through the door. The round had not gone his way, he'd ended up 6 shots above his standard handicap whilst Harry had got his PB. Pissed was an understatement - Tom had turned down the pub after, which meant he was absolutely fuming. Instead, he just wanted to come home and have a shower and forget about everything.
All of that kind of melted away though, when he rounded the corner of the hallway - the sight stopping him dead in his tracks.
You, standing side on, your outline a silhouette to the evening sun filtering through the doors. The light effect made you look ethereal, as well as exaggerating your bump evermore. And then you were holding up this tiny looking babygrow in front of you. It was inexplicable but, at that moment, literally nothing else mattered to Tom.
Of course, you eventually caught him staring, a soft smile growing on your face after you'd turned to pick another baby grow up. All it took was that one look for all the tension in his body to fizzle away. Immediately Tom took the steps towards you, hugging you from the back and propping his chin on your shoulder, whilst his hands slipped under your bump.
"Thought you said it was too early to get the baby stuff ready?"? He whisper- chuckled, making you roll your eyes. Because it was his puppy dog eyes begging you to let him by the 12 babygrows the other weekend.
"Shhhhh would you just look how small they are!" You gestured as you shook out another damp babygrow in front of him.
"Just imagine…" Tom spoke very quietly as he reached round you to take the little onsie out of your hands. He then lifted up the hem of your cotton vest top, laying the outfit on your exposed belly. "Someday soon they'll be outside your stomach like this."
The action, of him holding the cotton fabric over your belly, had everything feeling a lot more real all of a sudden. You were seriously going to have a baby.
It made you let out a little gasp, which Tom only chuckled at, pressing himself closer against your back. "You only just realised that love?"
"No I- ooh" You were about to violently defend yourself from Tom's laughter, except you were distracted by a slightly uncomfortable pressure on your stomach. Instantly you moved your hand over Tom's and pressed down on the area, so Tom could feel the little butterfly kicking through the babygrow.
"I think baby likes her outfit" You giggled, whilst now it was Tom's turn to hold in an unconscious breath. He slowly pressed around the outline of the protruding limb, which your baby kept returning as if high-fiving him.
"Oh my god she just fist-bumped me!"
"Or he!!!" You laughed, shaking your head against the top of his.
"Nah it's a girl I can sense it." He whispered, though very much not concentrating on anything except the little game he played with the baby in your stomach.
"Spidey sense?"
"Nope… special dad instincts." This time he spoke against your jaw, before peppering your bone with short pecks. "Mhm…." Tom spoke as he worked his way downward, poking his nose in the crook of your neck "I love my girls so much."
"Or boy!" You indignantly interjected, earning you a huff from Tom as he stayed softly nipping the sensitive skin just above your collarbone.
He was attempting to get you lost in the feeling, and boy was it also it working. Letting your head loll to the side to give him better access, you exhaled deeply, bringing your right hand round the back of both of you to trail through his brown curls. He was still a little sweaty from spending all evening in the summer sun- which reminded you.
"How was golf, by the way?" All you received was a mumbled 'doesn't matter' back, which in itself answered your question very well.
"That means you lost?" Giggling at his schoolboy attitude to defeat, Tom groaned, then even harder when you spun in his hold, so now you were facing each other - his hands still holding the baby grow on your bump between the both of you. This way you could see him, and he wasn't ever able to hide anything when your innocent gaze was on him.
"-sn't my fault" He pouted, big brown eyes looking so profoundly at you that some might even find the intensity scary. "My club broke anyway, so it wasn't a fair game."
That made you cock your head to the side. Really? A club just spontaneously breaking? You'd seen the bank statements; you knew how bloody much Tom invested into his club collection. They definitely shouldn't e flimsy and snapping spontaneously at their price point.
"The club broke orrr you broke the club?"
"The club was involved in an unfortunate accident; a tree collided with it."
You had to laugh at how Tom explained how he had taken his anger out on a tree. Tom returned your humour with an eye roll - not much enjoying being caught out.
It didn't last long, though, as and harsh jab interrupted you with an 'ooof'. It came from inside you and even Tom winced at how hard the little munchkin inside you kicked your side, right over where Tom's hands were resting.
"I think that's baby's way of telling you off for having a temper tantrum." Once recovered, you had to grin again, rubbing the skin with Tom's hand to ease the subsiding ache.
"Is it not too early for her to realise exactly who's in charge?" He grumbled, referring to the fact that you both knew Tom was wrapped around yours and soon to be babies fingers.
"Or him!".
To shut you up, Tom finally gave you the welcome home kiss, still with his hands holding the babygrow on your bump. Excited, if terrified, to be yours and your baby's bitch boy for the rest of his life.
~~~~let me know what you think, recently been finding acc writing v difficult so sorry if this aint great~~~~~~
taglist: @crossyourpeter@euphorichxlland@hallecarey1@hollandfanficlove@hollandlover19@hunnybunimdun@lovehollandy12@msmimimerton@pandaxnienke@fernandasantana @thegirlwiththeimpala
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tommysparker · 3 years ago
Text
Never Forget You [Chapter 4]
A/N: hey y’all. just wanna say sorry for the posting schedule change. life is about to get hella hectic with school and the move sooo yeah. every second Saturday I will be posting! it’ll defiantly give me a chance to write more as well so im not rushing out chapters. anyways ive rambled long enough, enjoy :) 
Warnings: angst. theres fluff too but its fluffy angst?? im not sorry hehe. long italic paragraphs = flashbacks. 
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From an outside perspective, one would assume the four of them were deep in thought, perhaps even communicating telepathically via the Force. They would only be half correct, as all of the Jedi were indeed thinking, but none of their trains of thought overlapped.  
Anakin and Ahoska were in the pilot seats, glancing at each other every other minute or so. They could feel the tension build thicker with every passing planet. The only sound filling the room was the faint running of the engine that kept the ship moving. 
You and Obi-Wan sat across from each other, neither one daring to make eye contact. Apparently, he was quite serious about the “not speaking from now on” agreement. It’s for the best, you kept telling yourself. However, the awkward silence that filled the ship made it harder to believe that. 
Out of all the things that could happen to you at the moment, this was by far the worst. 
On Gyfil, you had grown quite used to the sound of silence. In fact, over time you began to prefer it as opposed to the buzz of the towns. However, this was a different type of silence, one that had you bouncing your knee in anticipation for Anakin to announce you finally landed. 
Master Yoda had called you all for a mission briefing. There was a supposed Separatist group meeting on Ostor, given the intel you received from a client on your previous mission. The four of you were sent to listen in on it. 
“Young Skywalker and Padawan Tano, back up you will be. Great risks on Ostor, there are. Careful, you must be.” He turned to Obi-Wan and You. “Master Y/l/n, guide them you must do. In charge of the mission, I am putting you.” 
A sense of pride filled your body but you quickly humbled yourself. “Thank you Master.” 
Master Yoda smiled and turned to Obi-Wan. “Infiltrate the meeting, you and Master Y/l/n will. Stay together, you must.” 
Obi-Wan would have laughed at the irony. Mentally he still is. Stay together, you must. After the last conversation between the two of you, he had doubts about how that plan would go. However, for the sake of the mission he was willing to lift the deal made. 
You stood quietly, not being able to handle the loud silence any longer. “I’ll be in my quarters until we land,” you announced, making a point not to look at Obi-Wan and keep all attention to Anakin and Ahsoka. 
You left without sparing a glance back. 
He waited until you were out of view to let out a long sigh, running a hand over his beard and hunching forward. 
Anakin was the first to speak. “That was the worst thing I’ve ever had to endure.” His shoulders shook as he made a disgusted sound. “Glad it’s finally over.”��
“Just focus on getting us there in one piece, Anakin,” Obi-Wan snapped, immediately followed by, “apologizes, I didn’t mean to sound so...aggressive.” 
“So much for being able to hide stress, huh?” 
He smiled but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Some things are harder to deal with than others.” 
“Is Master Y/l/n ‘some things’?” Ahoska asked innocently. 
Obi-Wan pondered for a minute, deciding the best way to answer. “Master Y/l/n is...many things.” 
“Like what?” 
Gorgeous. Strong. Kind. Perfect in every way. “They are highly skilled, almost as well as I am, if not better. A fine Jedi and a valuable member to the Order.” He stopped there before he’d say something he’d come to regret. Best to keep professional thoughts. 
“I still don’t understand why the Council sent them away like that. Surely there were other Jedi that could have completed the mission,” Anakin commented. He knew his former Master wasn’t satisfied with the answer they were all given but would never admit it. He had to push him to find the truth. 
“Whatever reasons Master Yoda and Master Windu had for picking Y/n are between them. You must stop questioning the Council’s intentions, Anakin. It will land you in very big trouble one day.” Obi-Wan says as if he hasn’t second guessed the Order as a whole before. Ignorance is bliss, as they say. The less you question things, the easier life is. 
“That’s why I keep you around, old man,” Anakin said in a teasing manner. Hearing Obi-Wan let out a light chuckle made him feel a bit better as they settled into silence once more, this time more comfortable and light-hearted. 
A bit more time had passed before Ahsoka spoke up. “Why don’t you ask Master Y/l/n what really happened?” 
Obi-Wan sighed. He should have known better than to believe she would drop the topic. Like Master, like Padawan. “It’s none of my business. Frankly, it’s none of ours so I suggest we leave the subject alone.” 
His answer, apparently, wasn’t good enough. “I’m gonna go ask them.” Ahsoka stands up to leave but is stopped mid-movement by Obi-Wan’s protests. 
“No!” He looked at Ahsoka’s slightly stunned face, and chose to ignore Anakin’s smug look. “Fine, I’ll ask them. But only once, and if they don’t want to indulge me then that is the end of it. Do I make myself clear?” 
“Crystal.” 
Meanwhile, you sat alone on the bed in your chosen quarters. It made you feel relaxed, in a way. Before leaving, you were extremely extraverted, always going out of your way to make acquaintances with everyone around you. The life forces around you at night kept you alive, it gave a sense of warmth and comfort to lull you to slumber. On Gyfil, there was none of that. You had to rely on your own warmth to comfort yourself to sleep. No lush trees or animals to provide even the smallest bit of connection. It was just You and the Force. Sleeping for the first time in the Jedi Temple after returning felt like a sensory overload. Everything was loud, and rough. You could feel it coursing through your veins at the speed of light. No matter what you did, it was too much. 
You didn’t sleep the first few days. Eventually you got used to the noise, but not enough to get a decent amount of rest at night. There was one sound that sometimes made it impossible to sleep, one Force signature that kept trying to break through the walls you put up to protect yourself when you’re most vulnerable. What scared you the most was the fact your own signature subconsciously fought back against the walls you put. You refused to acknowledge it, choosing to fall into a deep meditative slumber and stay alert as opposed to any actual sleep. Whoever it was would not get into your head so easily. 
Knock knock. Obi-Wan stepped into the room once his presence was made known, gently shutting the door behind him. “Y/n…” 
You looked up and squinted at him. “I thought we agreed to not speak?” 
“Yes, well, that proves to be a bit tricky now doesn’t it?” He smiled tightly and crossed his arms over his chest. 
You huffed out air in a sorry attempt at a sarcastic laugh, shaking your head a little. “What do you want, Obi-Wan?” 
It was neither hostile nor endearing. It was simply his first name. To him you sounded tired, and judging by the way you sat on the cot, leaning back against the cold metal wall with your eyes half opened, he presumed his assumption was correct. He spoke gently, “Anakin estimates we should be coming out of hyperspace and landing soon.” 
“I figured.” It wasn’t your intention to be stoic but that's how you’ve been training yourself to speak to the man in front of you. The faster the conversation ends, the faster he leaves. 
Obi-Wan, however, was not having it. “How are you feeling? I know it hasn’t been that long since you returned from your previous assignment.” 
You shrugged, staring up at the ceiling. “I’m fine.” 
“No one who says that is ever truly ‘fine’ Y/n/n,” he says, taking a step closer to the bed. “I know you. What’s on your mind, darling?” 
You slowly met his gaze, debating whether to open up or keep yourself closed off. On one hand, the idea of exposing your anxieties to someone didn’t feel right to you, letting someone know about your weaknesses and insecurities. However, you knew in order for the mission to succeed you would have to be willing to work with Obi-Wan and to do that a sense of trust had to be built. Rebuilt, technically. 
“If you wish not to speak, I understand.” He hesitated turning his back to you, “excuse me.” He was about to make his leave before you interrupted. 
“Obi-Wan, wait,” You sighed, shifting so there was room for him to sit on the bed. “Sit.” 
He did as he was told, eyeing you carefully. “Honestly, I don’t mean to pry.” 
“It’s fine.” You knew his intentions and as pure as they were you cannot bring yourself to tell him the truth. “I admit that I...am slightly concerned about the mission.” 
It wasn’t the answer Obi-Wan was hoping for, but he was willing to hear anything he could get out of you. “You have nothing to be worried about Y/n/n. You’re an extremely capable Jedi and I have no doubt in my mind you will lead us through it.” 
You smiled, only slightly but a smile nonetheless. “Thank you.” 
“You’re welcome.” He smiled back. 
Your eyes locked tight with each other, and everything around you became emptiness. A void surrounded you both and the presence of the other was all that could be felt. 
“Staring competitions are pointless.” You rolled your eyes, sitting up straight and attempting to return your meditative state. 
“No they aren’t!: Obi-Wan argued from his spot across from you. 
“All you do is stare at each other until someone blinks. Waste of time.” 
“Nuh uh. Master Qui-Gon told me that--” Obi-Wan stood up, “--‘The eyes are a window to the soul’--” you laughed at the bad attempt he made to mimic his Master;s voice, “--therefore staring competitions can be a very good battle tactic.” 
“Jedi don’t do battles, remember? We’re peacekeepers.” You looked up at your friend. “Besides, you just want an excuse to get lost in my eyes.” 
Obi-Wan grinned. “You know me so well.” 
So much has changed about the man in front of you, you could hardly recognize him. You never allowed yourself the pleasure to examine what you missed out on. One moment he was a young man who looked like he could take on the universe, and now all you could see was one tired man doing his best. Oh, how the mighty have fallen, is what the old You would have teased. But post-living-ten-years-by-yourself You was different. In a way, you understood. Although you didn’t fight any life-threatening battles and put yourself in the line of fire every week, you have worked tirelessly towards the same goal. 
Peace. 
Like this moment. 
For once, it was quiet. You felt yourself relax slowly, focusing on the one noise that soothed your anxious mind. It felt warm and...close. Something you haven’t felt in a long, long time. 
Obi-Wan leaned closer, his heart reacting faster than his brain. He felt a warmth he had been longing for over a decade. When he reached out, he no longer felt desolate. He wanted to hold on to the feeling and never let go. 
But alas in time of war, small moments of peace only last for so long. 
“Hey! We’re here.”  
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reblog and comment what will happen on the mission  👀👀
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That dream angst fuckin wrecked my heart..any chance for a part 2 with comfort(im not the og requester so if not thats fine its just OUGH my heart)
So both you and the og requester asked for a part 2, which means I'm definitely gonna do it! (I'd do it even if the og didn't ask so lmao) I HAD TO REWRITE THIS 12 GOD DAMN TIMES BECAUSE TUMBLR IS SHIT AT SAVING THINGS
I'm honestly so glad people enjoy my writings! Feel free to request more! My inbox is open and I have no requests lined up yet!
Once again. This is a completely fictitious story and version of Clay.
TW: Panic attacks, self deprecating thoughts,
Part one
Found (Outside The Screen) (Dream x GN! Reader) Part 2
"(Y/n)!"
His voice echoed through the house as you scrambled around corners to escape the possible wrath of your boyfriend. Or maybe even soon to be ex boyfriend.
Despite living in this house with him for a little over two years, it was beginning to feel like a maze. You couldn't tell which way was left and which way was right, your head spinning with panic as you gasped for breath.
He's gonna find you...
The house wasn't even that big, and quite an open concept, so you had no idea why you were finding it so confusing. All you knew at the moment was...
Get out.
Once your eyes landed on the door that lead out, you made a beeline towards it and flung it open. Maybe you should've known better than to attempt to run from the manhunt god...
The footsteps pounding against the floor not too far behind you startled you enough to jump outside and slam the door behind you in hopes of giving yourself enough time to run farther.
There were plenty of things failing to register in your mind as you ran down the empty sidewalks. Such as the poor choice (or lack) of shoes you were wearing, or even the heavy night rain pelting down on your shaking body.
Your lungs were burning.. But your brain had thrown itself so far into fight or flight mode that you had no care for anything around you, hardly blinking twice as the signs of unfamiliar street names flew past you.
Eventually, when you physically couldn't breathe any longer, you sat on a bench and took awhile to think. The consistent rain pelting down on your head was actually a decent grounder to help you snap yourself out of it... But that only caused more confusion and another wave of panic to wash over you.
Where... were you?
Doesn't matter. Don't go back.
Oh God... He hates you..
Why wouldn't he..?
He was too embarrassed to show you to his chat!
What did you do that was so embarrassing?
God.. What was so wrong with you that he stayed in his streaming room for days on end!?
Pulling your knees up to your chest, you choked back a few sobs, trying your best to keep what was left of your composure. Very quickly, however, you gave up on trying to hold yourself together and broke down, hiding your face in your knees.
Time seemed to pass by way too quickly but also way too slowly at the same time.. Like time itself was giving you the one finger salute. When you finally stopped crying, you leaned back against the back of the bench and gave a shaky sigh before you decided to attempt to think rationally again.
You had no clue where you were. Nothing looked familiar. What time is it? No clue, you don't have your... Your phone!
You quickly scrambled to your pocket to pull out the cellular device, and stared at the black screen for a few seconds. Anxiety was the reason for your hesitance as you stared into your reflection, frowning slightly. Without thinking twice, you pressed the button and the screen lit up with various arrays of colours.
78 Missed calls from Clay💚
2 Missed calls from George👓🇬🇧
7 Missed calls from Sapnap🔥
Was... He so mad that his friends were trying to yell at you too? You tilted your head slightly and scrolled through the other notifications on your lockscreen.
Twitter seemed to be losing their minds over your boyfriend's stream and wondering who the stranger was. Seeing the headlines flooded you with immeasurable guilt and you almost put your phone down again, if your phone didn't start buzzing.
You glanced down at the screen and say Clay was making call number 79... Man, he was persistent.. and he would probably continue to call until you answered...
Your finger hovered over the decline button, before slowly moving over and landing on the green one instead. "...Hello...?"
"(Y/n)...?" Had... He been crying...? "Oh my god! You're alive!" He gasped out with glee before giving a few sobs of... relief...?
"...You... Aren't... Mad?" You whispered very softly and hesitantly, your voice scratchy and sore from crying.
He sighed and there was a little bit of shuffling as well as a few male voices in the background. "No. Not in the slightest... Where are you? I want to apologize in person.. And when it doesn't sound like you're in a hurricane.."
You lifted your head up to look at the rain that was continuing to pelt down on you before looking around. "..I'm not sure.." You heard your partner echo your statement in question form as you looked for street signs through the rain. Glancing back at your phone, you saw the screen light up again, this time it was a warning label.
Your battery was almost dead...
"C-Clay.. My phone is going to die.." You murmured softly, your heart filling with dread as you turned down your brightness and closed any unnecessary apps.
There was a little bit of clattering and shuffling on the line as Clay hurriedly walked from the windows to the door, trying to see you from the home. "G-give me landmarks! Hurry!" He practically begged as you shot up from your bench, ignoring the burning soreness in your legs.
Spinning around quickly, you began listing off a few company buildings you saw, trying to shout over the rain and a few cars driving by. "Yeah-yeah! There's also that little sushi place beside the restaurant too.."
You heard the furious typing of his computer before another almost sob of relief. "You're on Rosewood Avenue... How the hell did you run that far? Okay, you're going to walk in the opposite direction of the sushi place until you reach a road called Miller Road, got that?" He waited for a verbal noise of agreement before continuing, "Once you get there, turn left and keep walking straight until you get to a steakhouse. I'll meet you half way, if you don't see me there, don't move unless you have to. Got it?" He asked firmly, with a small hint of desperation in his tone.
You rubbed your face as you mentally repeated the directions to yourself. "Yeah.. Yeah.. I got it." You began to walk along the sidewalks, your shoulders beginning to tremble from the water induced shivers trailing up and down your spine.
"..(Y/n)?"
"Yeah?"
"I lov-"
Your phone died..
Pulling the device away from your head, you pressed the buttons a few times before groaning and shoving it into your pockets as you began to walk.
Your mind was blurry but also hyper aware along the walk to the road where Clay told you to go. 'What was he going to say? If... He doesn't hate me... was he going to say- No.. no. He hadn't said that line in over a few months now.. No reason why he would say it now..' You mentally scolded yourself.
The rain didn't seem to be too keen on letting up as you walked through large rippling puddles. Your clothes were soaked, your hair completely drenched and you were pretty sure you were gonna need to buy a new phone with how much your current one was getting waterlogged..
You rose your arm to shield your face from the onslaught of water that a car had caused by driving through a large puddle before running your hand down your face.
Part of you was still a bit.. angry... at Clay... He had ignored you for so long and wanted nothing to do with you.. Then suddenly you spill hot coffee on yourself and then boom, you have the man more focused than when he has a good speed run seed. What about all those times you were begging him to come to bed, or at least eat dinner at the table with you? Did you only matter when you were in pain?
Biting your lip, you shook off the thought as you looked up again to see the steakhouse that you were directed to go to, the signs glowingly and people shuffling in and out through the doors...
Then there was another man, standing under a large black umbrella wearing a damp lime green hoodie...
Only you'd recognize that face anywhere where others wouldn't.. Standing in the street lights perfectly was your boyfriend, Clay.
Your heart trembled but also melted slightly upon seeing that he wasn't paying attention to his screen anymore. You. He was focused on finding you...
As you began to walk closer, you saw him lift his head and stare at you for a few seconds before dropping the umbrella and lunge forward to wrap you in a loving embrace. "I'm sorry.." Was the first thing he whispered, his voice almost as hoarse as yours. "I know.. that a simple apology will never excuse what I put you through... You cared for me, and even after a stupidly ignored you... You still didn't leave, or get angry. I don't deserve you, I know that, and you have every right to be upset, angry or whatever you're feeling right now.. Please, it doesn't matter how long it takes... Just let me make it up to you and let me prove myself worthy of your love again.."
Your lips parted in surprise as you stared at him, the streetlight poorly capturing his normal beauty, but still doing it well enough that you felt your heart soar. "Clay..." Your eyes traced his features, his puffy and reddened eyes and his cheeks stained with tear tracks, "You have a lot to work and make up for... I'm not going to forgive you immediately, but I'm not going to leave you.. We can work things out.. Together, okay?"
He eagerly nodded and gently held your face in his hands before pressing a light kiss to your forehead. "I'll break away from video editing and streaming for a while.. So I can focus on repairing things with you.."
You buried your face into the male's sweater, that was beginning to become soaked as well from the rain and you, and closed your eyes as you wrapped your arms around him.
"(Y/n)?"
"Mm..?"
"I love you."
"I love you too, Clay."
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descendantofthesparrow · 3 years ago
Text
planned dynamic of Mal/Hades/Hadie
okay so this is just me writing my thoughts out so if you don't want spoilers don't look below the cut
so Mals planned relationship with Hades; her entire life she's been told her father is a weak human being who was banished by maleficent to never show his face around her or Mal again, so Mal aches for her father who was forced to leave her until around 7 years old because she is beaten into the belief that ‘if he truly wanted her, he would have tried to see her’. so when she discovers her father is hades...she's really damn confused, angry at her mother for lying to her (again) and the most intense feeling “hurt”. why? why had Hades never try to see her? unlike her “father” who had been banished and probably to scared to see his daughter, Hades didn't care about her mother, didn't fear her, so why did he never try to see her? to care for her? he was decent father to Hadie so why couldn't he spare a few moments of his time for Mal? 
she was told by hades and Maleficent that she was an accident (her mother told her she had a moment of weakness, Hades said he got black out drunk and found out she existed 9 months later when Maleficent demanded her take Mal for a month after losing sleep and was sick of her child) 
Mal denies her relationship with Hades,(though she does tell her friends about her discovery) she refuses to believe that her ‘father’ was a powerful god that could less of a rat tooth about her fae mother, she would rather have a banished father who couldn't afford to see her than a coward who didn't care to see her. Mal doesn't say it, but she’s wanted her father to be around her entire life, and now she suddenly has him and she desperately wants to accept him, but she wont. she deserves better then him and only wants to get the ember for Hadie to use, and leave. and then never talk to her ‘father’ again.
this is her internal struggle through out the story, she has three actually, i think i dunno im still kinda brainstorming (my brain; you’re in the middle of writing this damn rewrite and you’re STILL thinking of Mal’s plot? ME; IM IMPROVISING) the first is her slight identity crises from losing her mothers magic due to Audrey zapping it, she's been the daughter of Maleficent all her life and now she's just, nobody. the second is her dilemma of her father, for so long she's thought her father was a human who wanted her, but couldn't see her due to the threat of being killed, but now her father is a god who didn't want her (or at least that's what she thinks) so she struggles to accept her parentage of both sides and deal with the heart ache of knowing her father didn't even try to see her. the third is dealing with the long coming consequences of her actions from her past, dealing with Audrey's sudden turn to Evil due to her mother possessing Audrey, dealing with the biased and bitter views of Leah, and then dealing with her friends getting fed up with her lies and rash decisions. Mal has gotten better as a person and has apologized to her friends for her actions on the isle, she’s apologized to Audrey and Ben for her choices of evil back when she first arrived at Auradon.
but just because she genuinely regrets her past selves actions and has been better as a person in both words and actions, it doesn't mean it all wont come back to bite her in the ass. (this turned into talking about my plot for Mal but eh)
Hades planned relationship with Mal; Hades didn't lie to Mal in saying she was a mistake, he, being under the barrier, had lost his god strength tolerance for alcohol and got black out drunk, did the do with Maleficent and ended up with a baby Mal at his lair when she was a half month hold. he took care of her for about...three months lets say, and then Maleficent took Mal back, realizing the potential of having (owning) a demi god fae child. Hades tried through out the years to see Mal, but was either forcefully turned away by Maleficent’s goons or Maleficent herself forced him away from their daughter.
Hades did want a relationship with Mal because he missed out on his first daughters life, he has his son but he aches for his daughter Melinoe and decides he will attempt to raise Mal to make up for not being able to raise Melinoe, but unfortunately he never gets the chance and by the time mal is 5 years old, he figures she doesn't want him around because every time he approaches her she just looks at him hostility, and while he thinks its because she doesn't want him, its actually because Mal only knows him as a enemy for her mothers territory. so Hades respects Mals ‘wishes’ and leaves her be, checking u on her once and a while (and sneaking her food on nights Maleficent punished mal with no meals)
Hadie’s planned relationship with Mal; so Hadie is that half brother who denies caring about anyone, and he’s kinda meh about Mal, he’s known she's his half sister since she was delivered to Hades because he was already 3-4 years old when Mal was born. but he’s kinda like “well she exists?” he keeps an eye on her because well, instincts, but doesn't go out of his way to protect her or anything because she’s already “protected” by Maleficent's reputation as well as him not really giving a fuck about Mal. he doesn't really start to see her as his little sister until after his mother, Persephone, basically goes “hi yes you’re mine now” after she learns of Mal’s parentage from Hades (Persephone is a little peeved with Hades after leaning of his accidently affair but he makes it up to her) 
Hadie’s relationship with Hades; its pretty good, Hades is a decent dad, though he’s a little emotionally unavailable but he does his best to raise his son the way he thinks Persephone would’ve raised him. they don't really say ‘i love you’ to each other but that's less to do with any type relationship strain but more with the isle. all in all, Hades does his best with what he has and Hadie appreciates that and hopes he can see his parents back together one day so he can see his dad be happy again.
all in all, Hades isn't the worst father in the world, and is really not the best to Mal because of circumstances, if he had helped raised her Mal would be more well rounded and would’ve had access to her Hades magic a lot sooner (she would also look like him a bit more (through her hair n eyes, like how she looks in her 2nd hair & eye color change in D3 rewrite, the purple to blue fade i designed for her with yellow-green eyes)
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theworldofotps · 4 years ago
Text
Silent Feelings (Part 2 of S.S)
Pairing: Dexter Lumis x Reader Word Count: 1,404 Description: Dexter wants to do more than just be y/n’s friend. But how can he do that when neither are sure how the other feels?
Part 1
Part 3
Warning: Povs switch between first and third person throughout the fic. They are separated by ~~~ so hopefully you don’t get confused.
Also I wrote the little piece Dexter gives the reader a while ago so please be gentle.
Thank you @new-zealand-chic for beta reading for me! ________ Tag list: @hungmanhorsecarriage @writtingrose @sjwrites22 @sassymox @the-beastslayers-queen @thewrestlingwarehouse @new-zealand-chic @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @xladyxfatex @biforrollynch @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch @demonqueen29 @itsicantbelievethis666 @lilred91 @xbreezymeadowsx  @rebellious-desires @youcantreignonmyparade @melblacc @letsgivethisonemoreshot @omg-im-such-a-masochist 
If you wanna be added to the list lemme know. _______ “So as your best friend besides old Finn here I need to ask you..has Dexter kissed you yet?”
Shotzi smiles as she leans across the table waiting patiently for me to give her what I’m assuming she’s hoping is juicy details.
“Listen Shots, we’ve only gone out a few times so no he hasn’t kissed me yet, he hasn’t even attempted to but I don’t mind. Sure I’d like to kiss him but I want him to be comfortable and I don’t know if he even wants to kiss me.”
I trail off looking between them when they stare at me sipping my water I offer an awkward smile. 
“Will you two stop staring at me please because it’s really making me uncomfortable.”
“Oh come on lass of course the lad wants to kiss you but maybe he's worried you don't want that. Sometimes it's hard telling what a person wants."
"He's right, I mean he's always getting you your favorite coffee. Without you even asking and when you go to pay it back he won't let you. It's been what a few months give or take, since you two went on your first outing together. And you've had countless ones since then. Not to mention you're always talking and he hasn't even spoken to you, and."
"Okay, Shotzi I think she gets it lass, sit down and take a breather."
Finn pats her shoulder before looking back at me. 
"I really think he'd like to kiss you, he watches your mouth a lot and Dexter just really looks at you like a man that wants to grab up his girl and lay one on her."
"I hear what you all are saying and it makes sense I'm just scared you guys could be reading it wrong. If it happens it does and if it doesn't it's fine, now if you two will excuse me. I'm gonna pack up for the day and head home. I wanna get a nice soak in the tub before it gets too late."
"Alright sorry it's just really exciting to see you so happy, Finn said for all the years he's known you. This is the happiest you've been in a while."
"Just giving out all of my secrets Devitt?"
"Hey it was just casual conversation, now go off and enjoy your night." 
“Thanks see you two later.”
Hugging them both I sling my bag over my shoulder and leave the table making my way down the hall I pull my phone out. I wasn’t sure if this would do any good but I decided why not give it a shot.
Y/n💮: Do you wanna come over and hang out for a bit?
Pressing send I make it out to my car setting my duffel back on the seat next to me, rolling the windows down I turn the radio up pulling out of the lot. Singing along to the music I dance in my seat thinking about what Shotzi and Finn had said. Dexter had been doing little things here and there for me, I was getting a decent collection of his painting. Not to mention he had started leaving little poems in my locker room every Wednesday. Maybe they were right and tonight I was planning on finding out.
Pulling into my garage I go into the house I was renting from my cousin kicking my shoes off I check my phone.
D. Lumis👀: Yeah sure I’ll be there in half an hour need me to bring anything?
Y/n💮: Any snacks if you’d like we can order dinner here?
D. Lumis👀: Sounds good see you then
Y/n💮: Be safe 
Running upstairs I start a bath I could spend twenty minutes soaking and showering than the last ten dressing. Searching for a comfortable outfit I take it into the bathroom finishing up getting everything set and I strip stepping in. This water felt amazing on my soar muscles. ~~~~~ Dexter dresses in a pair of slacks and a black tank top, he was excited to spend some time with you. Even if he didn’t particularly look so. Grabbing his phone and keys Dexter leaves his room going downstairs. Grabbing the small box he had for you Dexter locks up his house going to his car. He’d stop at the store closest to your house and grab the snacks before continuing to your place. Going inside he grabs a few of your favorite snacks and drinks then going to the front he pays. Now it was time to head over and meet you. ~~~~~ Wrapping the towel around my body I leave the bathroom and make my way into the bedroom. Grabbing my undergarments I go to put them on and stop hearing a knock on my front door. Damn must have been in the bathroom a little longer than planned. Rushing from the room I make my way downstairs and look out the peep hole.
“Dexter!”
Smiling I open the door and greet him as I step back to let him in. Watching as his eyes flicked down my frame and then back up. I had completely forgotten that I was only in a towel. Embarrassment hits me full force as I rub the back of my neck.“
Sorry about that I was in the shower and ended up being in there longer then I meant to be.”
Offering a smile as he stepped inside Dexter holds up two bags in his hands. 
“You got the stuff awesome, go ahead and sit in the living room. Please make yourself comfortable. I'm just uh gonna go get dressed.”
Quickly turning away I go back up to my room closing the door. Leaning against it I groan and sigh then continue with getting dressed. After I was finally ready I left my room going back downstairs. 
“Okay I’m back ready to order some food and watch a movie?”
~~~~~ Dexter nods his head showing you he had the snacks and drinks all set up. He scoots over so you could sit next to him and he pulls out a smaller bag. Setting it in your hands, Dexter watches you nervously.
“What’s this?”
You asked him and he motions for you to open it. Lifting the paper he watches as you pull out the small framed poem he gave you a few weeks ago. Occasionally he’d write a poem and give it to you, this was one of your favorites.
“Wildflowers, by Dexter Lumis.”
You read out loud as you look at the frame. 
‘If I had to use one single word to describe you it would be, wildflower. Your personality is brightly colored with love and patience.  The strong will you hold is a trait I think I admire the most.
Despite all the things thrown at you darling you continue to grow.  The space you take up in this world makes life beautiful. Be that you are soft at times when vulnerable, but always firm when need be.  All your different traits add up to the beautiful free spirit you are.’
“Awee Dexter that's so sweet thank you.”
Giving you a small smile and nod Dexter offers you the remote to pick a movie for you to watch. Selecting one of your favorites you order dinner then settle back resting your head on his shoulder. 
As the evening continued on Dexter could see you were getting tired, even though you kept denying it. Halfway through the fourth movie Dexter looked at the time seeing it was nearly midnight. You really should be getting to bed and he needed to get home. 
Gently nudging you Dexter smiles as you cuddle closer to his side. Sighing he grabs the blanket off the back of your couch laying down so you were resting on his chest and covers you both. Rubbing your back lightly when you start to stir Dexter turns the tv off.
Once the room is plunged in darkness he closes his eyes, if he was honest he was loving every minute of holding you.
“Dexter.”
You mumbled causing him to open his eyes and rub your back a little softer.
“Hmm?”
“Thank you for staying I really like having you over….I really like you.”
Yawning you rub your eyes drifting back off to sleep and just before you’re completely gone you hear what you think is a faint whisper.
“I really like you too y/n.”
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tsukifanbase · 4 years ago
Text
Obey Me! Brothers Realize They Don’t Want M/C to Leave Devildom
Authors Note: aaaaaa not much to say here except.... enjoy!
Warnings: fluffffyyyy, lil bit angsty but like so is all of my writing hehe, nothin too bad
-----------------------------------------------
Lucifer:
- idk i feel like luci already kinda suspected he had fallen head over heels for you
- i alsoo feel like he probably tried to push you away after he noticed you had stolen his heart
- never fear though, dear (m/c)! because lucifer didn’t quite account for how difficult it would be distance himself, either because you kept popping up at just the right time or because he subconsciously missed you :)
- anywhosie roll the tape lol
- lucifer vaguely wondered where all the time had gone
- just a few moments before, he was grinding through a ton of paperwork for your return to the human realm, and it hit him like a ton of bricks
- you were leaving
- it stunned luci, sure, he had known you were leaving at some point, and he was literally signing papers confirming that very fact, but it hadn’t quite clicked for him yet
- for a moment, he felt no sadness about your leaving, only shock and confusion
- not about how fast the past year had moved, more so, luci found himself hating the thought of not having you by his side
- it stunned him, keep in mind, all this time luci thought he was keeping you at a distance, when in reality, maybe you were so easy to love that he hadn’t even noticed when he let you get closer
- lucifer snapped out of it, and glanced around his office, his eyes landing back on the paperwork that he had abandoned
- the date printed across the paper was the same one he had memorized so long ago, the day you were leaving
- luci pushed himself away from his desk, and practically ran walked quickly to your bedroom
- you didn’t notice when he walked into the room, you were distracted, staring at a framed photo of the brothers and you at some event you went to in the past
- you were smiling, and lucifer felt himself melt when he saw that
- and in that moment, it didn’t matter that luci used to see you as a distraction
- because he realized that he loved you
- and with that new knowledge, his next move came easily
- after all, lucifer would never allow someone he loved so dearly to ever slip through his fingers, ever again
- “lucifer?”, your voice broke his train of thought, he was smirking at you, you weren’t quite sure when he had begun observing you, it wasn’t that you really minded though
-”is something troubling you?”, although he had that flippin gorgeous smile spread across his lips, you always had a knack at knowing when something was wrong
- lucifer didn’t stop smirking, but he made his way over to you
- “may i?”, luci gestured for you to hand him the photo, which you did pretty much immediately 
- luci lifted the photo up closer so he could see you better, and then he chuckled as he handed the item back to you
- he pointed at mammon, “i seem to recall having to pour my drink on him that day”, lucifer chuckled to himself
- you looked surprised for a second, then squinted your eyes at mammon in the photo, his shirt was half drenched in an unknown, red liquid
- “i always wondered how he got soaked!”, luci smiled at you, then crossed his arms knowingly
- “do you want to know why?”, lucifer’s eyes remained glued on you, you were seemingly caught off guard, you then nodded
- “why?”, you asked, tilting your head slightly
- “he planned to ask you to dinner with him that evening”, luci seemed embarrassed for a moment, then his smirk returned 
- “so why did that warrant getting a drink poured on him?”, you questioned, and lucifer took him eyes off you for the first time since he had entered the room, he sighed, then brought his gaze back to yours
- “because i recognized how much i hated sharing someone that was mine”, he chuckled, a light pink spreading across his cheeks, “especially with mammon”
- now i wish i could say you looked shocked, you didn’t, you looked smug as hell lolol
- “i don’t want you to return to the human realm”, lucifer lightly picked up your hand that wasn’t holding the photograph, he figured he would be straightforward
- you grinned at him
- “then i guess i’m not going back to the human realm”
Mammon:
- okay okay so lets be real here we all flippin knew mammon had a crush on you
- that included mammon actually
- he didn’t suppress his feelings like luci, in fact mammon had always been pretty open about the fact that he liked you, a lot
- mammon also realized you were leaving soon
- and that put faze one of his plan into action
- his logic was pretty flawed on this one y’all, but mammon figured, you couldn’t leave if hypothetically your transfer papers weren’t signed, or you were late for school that day, orrrr... i think you can see where i’m going with this
- mammon was determined, he would not let you leave devildom that day
- and that brings us to you, an hour late for school already, because your alarm hadn’t gone off
- you pulled on your uniform, and double checked that all your bags were packed, before making a mad dash out of the house of lamenation 
- you checked your watch as you ran to the school, yes, you had definitely missed most of first period, but as long as you were in the school by the end of the day, you would be returning to the human realm without an issue
- or so you thought, turns out mammon had a million different things planned to keep you by his side indefinitely
- he had bribed your first period teacher to give you detention for being tardy, since he knew the teacher probably would have let you off the hook, seeing as it was your last day
- and yes, mammon spending his money on someone other than himself was usually unheard of, but who can say? desperate times call for desperate measures
- sometime before lunch hour, you wandered into the bathroom, making sure you looked decent, after all, you hadn’t really been able to check your appearance that morning
- in the mirror behind you, you saw three lower class demons wander into the restroom, giving you an evil smile that you just knew meant you would be late to your next period
- it was then that you realized something abnormal was clearly wrong
- the demons that had entered after you hadn’t said anything, nor made any more to hurt you, they simply stood by the door, knowing you weren’t going to take any chances with trying to get past
- they were keeping you in there, so what was their motivation?
- someone must’ve put them up to it 
- eventually you were able to leave, the demons seemingly lost interest, you sighed and made your way to detention- it took place during lunch hour
- you took your seat in detention, and after a bit, you heard your teacher, that was supposed to be monitoring you, leave the room
- the teacher didn’t return, and the bell for your next class rung 
- you walked over to the door, and attempted to open it
- the door was jammed
- because of course it was
- instead of yelling for help, you sighed and pulled out your phone
- you had a pretty good idea of who could’ve been behind all the bad things that had happened to you that day
- your phone barely rang once, before mammon picked up 
- “hey, (m/c), what’s up?”, you could almost feel the nervousness dripping off his voice
- “mammon, why am i locked in a classroom right now?”, you replied, and just as you could hear mammon’s nerves, he could nearly hear the absolutely terrifying, ‘im gonna kill you’, smile that you had on your face
- mammon chuckled nervously, “sorry (m/c)! it’s for your own good!”, then he hung up
- you scowled at your phone, then went to call levi to tell him to come let you out
- it was pretty clear that mammon didn’t expect to see you sitting in your last class of the day, one of the classes the two of you shared
- he walked in with a big, smug smile on his face, which very quickly turned to a look of surprise, then fear
- mammon nearly walked out of the classroom, luckily the teacher was there to drag him back in by his jacket
- he sat down next to you, and attempted to pretend like nothing was wrong
- “hiya (m/c)! how’s my favorite human’s day been?”, you stared at him blankly
- the teacher still hadn’t started the lecture yet, so it gave mammon time to finally admit and explain his master plan to you
- he was sheepishly glancing away from you by the time he was done whisper rambling, he mumbled out a quick and quiet, “’m sorry, okay?”
- the teacher finally started lecturing the class about devildom history of something, when you broke out into a fit of quiet laughter
- mammon completely disregarded the teacher, blushing furiously, he thought you were laughing at him
- “hey it’s not that funny”, he pouted a bit before you seized your laughter, and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm yourself
- “you know you could’ve just asked right?”, you giggled a bit after you whispered that to him
- “huh?”, that caught mammon off guard
- “you could’ve just asked me to stay here with you”, pink dusted your cheeks, “i like you too mammon”
- you just killed him good job
Leviathan:
- ok ok ok levi is bb
- it took a little while for levi to actually trust you
- cos we all know that it takes a while for babe to warm up to people
- but hun when he finally does start wanting to be around you, you can bet that you’re his new bff
- it’s so cute like 
- by the end of your stay in the devildom, you’re hanging out with levi pretty much every day (i say pretty much bc he is an introvert, he likes his alone time, so while you spend most of your time together, expect that he’s gonna want to be by himself sometimes)
- anyways
- you two got to know each other really well through hanging out so much, and levi caught feelings really quickly
- you were the first real person to ever show interest in the things he liked, and the first person to really listen to him 
- you were kind to him, and also assured him that you enjoyed your time spend together, even when levi tried to insist you would never want to hang out with a yucky otaku
- so that brings us to the day you had to leave 
- you had spent the morning in levi’s room, and had noticed that he was being clingier than usual (although ‘clingier than usual’ for levi literally just means that he was sitting like an inch closer to you than usual lol)
- the two of you were just about to beat the final boss in your favorite video game
- you hadn’t really noticed how much levi was staring at you, after all, your focus was completely trained on something else
- but i assure you, levi found himself glancing at you every few seconds, almost like he was trying to make sure you were still there
- it flustered him, and levi found himself blushing at the thought, but he cared for you more then he ever could have imagined
- remember, levi hadn’t ever really had a true friend, other than henry, of course
- he had been lonely for so long, and now that he had someone he wanted to spend the rest of his life beside, who could blame him for not wanting to let you out of his sight?
- and while that could’ve been deemed as possessive, it seemed levi was just acting out of fear
- he was afraid, because he really didn’t want to see you go
- you dealt the final blow to the boss, causing the credits for the game to roll, and you let out a sigh of relief
- you turned to grin at levi, and give him a high five in celebration, you lowered your hand when you noticed that levi was already staring at you
- his expression not quite blank, levi looked sad 
- “levi?”, you tilted your head at him curiously, that seemed to snap him back to reality, and caused a deep red blush to settle on his face
- you smiled briefly before standing up to put the controller on a side table
- “is something wrong, levi?”, you turned back towards him to ask your question, “you’re not exactly as happy as i thought you would be after beating that boss”, you giggled to yourself when levi covered his blush with his hand, he was probably embarrassed that you had noticed 
- “no, nothing’s wrong”, you could barely hear him, he was mumbling 
- you went back over to where levi was sitting, kneeling so you were at his level 
- “you’re sure that nothing is wrong?”, you placed a hand on levi’s knee in a soothing manner, his blush deepened, any physical contact usually did that to him
- levi was covering his face with both his hands now, then he said something, his speech was muffled by his hands, you couldn’t make out what he said
- he huffed, then dropped his hands from his face to cross his arms across his chest
- “could you stay with me?”, levi whispered, “please?”, this time you heard him clearly, and you smiled in a way that made him go fuzzy
- you carefully raised one of your hands up to levi’s cheek, cupping his face, then you pressed a kiss to his other cheek
- “i thought you’d never ask”
Satan:
- okay so pretty much here’s the run down
- satan typically wasn’t one to share his reading time with anyone else
- while it was extremely easy to ignore outside distractions while he was concentrating on a book, satan still preferred to read in isolation
- something about the calming atmosphere, no other care in the world but his book, it was satan’s getaway from the hectic life he lived
- he never was willing to share that getaway until he found you reading in the library about a week into your stay in the devildom
- it was the first time that he wasn’t even remotely annoyed by another person’s presence during his reading session
- of course you weren’t silent, but he found himself comforted by your being there
- ever since that point, it was pretty common to find the two of you reading in the library together
- although satan found himself drawn to you even when neither of you were reading, sometimes he would find himself sitting on the edge of your bed, doing his schoolwork while you played a game on your d.d.d.
- if satan was being honest with himself, you were probably the first person he had never gotten angry with
- you never gave him any reason to get upset, and he adored that about you
- you were like a breath of fresh air
- that brings us to the evening before your departure
- you had slipped into satan’s room while he was sitting at his desk doing schoolwork, he noticed you entered, but it was so normal for the two of you to seek each other that he really didn’t feel the need to comment on it
- you settled yourself on his bed, and quickly lost yourself in your book, not noticing when satan would occasionally peer back at you over his shoulder
- it was probably about an hour after you had entered the room that satan finished up the paper he was writing
- he glanced over at the clock, internally sighing at how late it had gotten, then he turned in his chair to look over at you
- you had your head propped up on your hands, but your eyes were closed, and your breathing steady- you were asleep
- satan walked over to where you were lying on his bed, lightly taking your book from you and placing it on the bedside table, before he pulled the covers over you
- satan sat down on the bed beside you, carefully, so he wouldn’t wake you
- he smiled when you mumbled something in your sleep, and moved a strand of your hair from your face
- “i wish you wouldn’t leave me yet, my dear”, satan turned away from you to turn the lamp off, allowing the room to be engulfed in darkness
- “so who do i ask to rip up my transfer papers?”
Asmodeus:
- hmmm well we all know that asmo adored you in every way
- he finally had someone to go shopping with! someone who wouldn’t eat his things or steal everything once he paid
- the two of you were pretty much inseparable, it was cuttteee
- you were a regular on his social media, and all his fans loved you just as much as he did
- asmo insisted on helping you do your makeup and choose your outfit one day early in your stay, and from that day on, it was pretty normal for him to burst into your room each morning to help your fashion game 
- and pretty soon he was taking you to all his favorite shops and treating you to delightful food (he wanted to take pictures of it for his fans)
- the day you were supposed to leave the devildom, asmo woke you early, as if this were just any other day
- he decided to treat you to a special going away shopping trip, and said that anything you desired was as good as yours
- let’s get to the scene!
- asmo was holding up a shirt that was exactly your style, he had always been good at picking things you liked
- needless to say, you weren’t really focused on the shirt, and asmo would’ve been delighted to know that he was clouding your mind
- you didn’t want to leave the devildom, not only because you had come to see the brothers as family, but because you didn’t want to leave asmo
- all the time you had spent together had made you realize just how much you cared for him, and you were pretty much just waiting for asmo to ask you to stay
- “hmm? what’s this? my dear (m/c) you’re not getting distracted by my beauty, are you?”, he teased, glancing over the shirt before placing it back on the clothing rack. 
- pink spread across your cheeks, and you shook your head, before going to look through the accessories 
- you were close enough that you heard what he said next
- asmo let out a deep sigh, “i just can’t seem to focus today, knowing that i won’t be able to shop with my dear anymore”
- you turned to face him quickly, speaking before either of you really recognized what you said, “then why don’t i stay?”, you covered your mouth after those words slipped past your lips
- you looked up at asmo nervously, and found him staring back at you with utter awe, then it turned to joy
- asmo dropped whatever clothing he was holding and ran over to hug you, his grin brightening the room 
- “do you really mean it?”, asmo asked hopefully, to which you nodded, and he squeezed you into another hug, you sunk into his embrace 
- “i’m so glad”
Beelzebub:
- ok other than asmo, i think beel was probably the fastest to warm up to you 
- although that could’ve been because of your talent with cooking (honestly you could just be making box mac and cheese and beel would still love that you were cooking for him XD)
- it was probably a few days into your stay when beel was casually complaining about being hungry, he was usually ignored by his brothers when his stomach rumbled, so needless to say, he was a little bit surprised when you offered to make him something
- he nodded, followed you to the kitchen, and boom you got yourself a lovable, hungry boy as your new bff
- from then beel pretty much came to you ever time he was hungry between meals, because while he could make himself food, he enjoyed your company and honestly just liked it when you cooked for him
- that means we talkin about midnight snacks, brunch like every day, afternoon meal, you and beel were spending a lot of time together
- beel started coming to you not only because he was hungry, but because he wanted to see you
- you would tell him stories about the human world and about your life while you made cooked, and beel started to love the faraway look in your eye as you reminisced
- he found himself drawn to you, your familiarity, something about you felt like home, although he wouldn’t have put it that way
- beel only realized that he liked being around you, and when he found out you would be leaving him soon, he only seeking you out more
- you guys were sitting in the kitchen, it was early in the morning, before breakfast
- you were making pancakes, still rubbing the traces of sleep from your eyes
- little did you know, that was probably the first time ever that beel didn’t really feel like eating, and he zoned out staring at a pancake thinking about that very fact
- if he wasn’t hungry, then why did he ask you to cook for him? why did he seek you out, and wake up early to go ask you to do something that wasn’t necessary?
- “beel?”, you asked, noticing that the pancake you had set in front of him a few minutes prior was still untouched
- you walked over to where beel was sitting and placed a hand on his shoulder gently, he felt himself relax into your touch, “are you okay?”, you asked him quietly, you were just a tad bit concerned that he wasn’t eating, you had never seen a piece of food survive in front of him for more than three seconds before
- and just like that, beel spoke before he even truly realized what plaguing his mind himself
- “can you stay in the devildom?”
- you stared at him in brief surprise before your face broke into a smile
- “sure, if you eat the pancakes i made you”
Belphegor:
- ok ok ok ok so we all know that belphie had some trouble with humans when he first met you
- butttt as soon as you two became friends, he started noticing all the things he used to love about humans, all within you
- you found joy in little things, lived your life taking on every new challenge, one after the other gracefully
- you were empathetic, and it always stunned him, but you never got angry with belphie after he tricked you
- if anything, you treated belphie with more kindness than he deserved, because you recognized that he tricked you, and kinda sorta tried to kill you, because he was in pain
- because he needed to blame someone else for his sister’s demise, so it wouldn’t break him
- anyways, once belphie began trusting you, he wanted to be around you constantly which you were totally okay with haha
- you reminded him of someone who was dear to him once, and it made him want to stay by your side forever
- okkkk so needless to say, belphie was 1000% a bad influence on you haaa
- like he was clever enough to get away with things he shouldn’t have gotten away with
- for example, lazy boyo was lazy, so he would show up to class late pretty much every day
- however, unlike other students, belphie would just kinda appear in his seat at some point during the class
- it made the teacher question if they were going crazy or if belphie had just been there all along and they hadn’t noticed
- like the teacher would literally do a double take, like they’re scanning the room to ask someone a question and their eyes land on belphie, and they just go, ‘hang on’
- you rarely saw belphie doing his school work, yet he would always have perfect grades
- anyways back to the original point
- belphie had curious ways of getting what he wanted, and that was no different the day you were scheduled to leave 
- the two of you were sleeping, it was nearly noon, and you had been contemplating your escape from belphie’s arms for the past hour
- you had to be at RAD by the end of the school day, and at that rate, you would have missed the goodbye ceremony completely
- so it was either risk upsetting diavolo, prince of the devildom, or your sweet, sleepy boy
- you decided to take your chances with the one you knew better, and began the process of removing yourself from belphie’s grasp
- you took a deep breath of relief once you were out of bed
- it wasn’t like you didn’t enjoy cuddling with belphie, deep down you probably wished you could stay curled up with him forever, but you knew that you had to leave 
- you wandered into the bathroom connect to belphie’s room, and started brushing your teeth
- when you finished brushing, you turned back towards the bathroom door, where belphie was leaning, rubbing his eyes and yawning
- you froze, and then you gave belphie a guilty smile, “good morning, bel”
- belphie crossed his arms, “where do you think you’re going?”, he never liked being woken up early, it always put him in a bad mood
- you looked at belphie curiously for a second, had he forgotten you were leaving? now that you thought about it, he really hadn’t ever acknowledged that you would be returning home, not once had you ever talking about it
- “i-”, you started, unable to finish your train of thought, as bel interrupted you
- “you’re leaving?”, he asked, but instead of sounding angry like you expected, his tone with playful, and you finally noticed a folded slip of paper bel was holding between his fingers
- you tilted your head at him, “bel?”, he smirked at you and stepped closer, holding out the paper for you to take
- you took the paper from him carefully and unfolded it, scanning over the printed words
- it was a document, one regarding your residence in the devildom, and at the bottom of the paper, was lucifer’s signature
- “bel? what is this?”, you glanced up at him, he was staring at you in the most loving way you could imagine
- “the paperwork that means you can stay”, belphie said carefully, picking up your hand and playing with your fingers
- you stared at him in disbelief before pulling him into a hug, “thank you, bel”
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dateamonster · 4 years ago
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Not monster nor unpopular opinion related, but do you have any horror media recommendations about perfectionism being evil? You know, typical "this area thats supposed to make you perfect is actually torturous to 'fix' you".
oo this is a good subject lemme think
one of my alltime fav twilight zone episodes "number 12 looks just like you" works with this concept in a way that still gives me the creeps to this day. its truly the episode that keeps on giving because in a surface sense its a dystopia based on plastic surgery and the beauty industry, but the more you pay attention to the subtle worldbuilding the more you notice messages about eugenics, fascism, propaganda/information control, (presumably) classist hierarchy, and the use of drugs to control populations. its got a lot goin for it.
speaking of plastic surgery and the beauty industry! i know "uglies" was probably on half of you guyses summer reading lists at one point anyway but if you havent and you like ya dystopia but wish it wasnt all Like That, check it out. i only read the first book and it was a long time ago so this is more a recommendation of a recommendation since i have a friend who still vouches for the series, and i personally still have a huge fondness for the author scott westerfeld. the concept of the uglies series imo is like, what a lot of writers in the modern dystopia-fiction boom wish they were writing.
this is like absolutely not what you asked for except for in the loosest most conceptual sense but im begging someone out there to read "the island of dr moreau". it fucked me up a bit and i want it to fuck you up too. im twisted and evil like that. but like in a cute way.
another one i feel like yall probably already know is "the perfection". its a netflix horror film that got big for a hot minute but not as big as it shouldve gotten because this movie made me craaazy. i actually stopped watching like a third of the way in the first time i attempted this movie because i was so freaked out in such a highly specific way and baby it literally only got worse from there. but in a good way. how do you recommend horror movies without sounding like a maniac? anyway, please please seek out the content warnings if youre going to watch this.
(i mean check the content warnings for most of these, and for any horror stuff you seek out, bc its a good practice to get into if you know theres stuff that messes you up. i dont but thats because im a stupid idiot who only remembers that my brain is delicate halfway through the film.)
"spiral" (2019) is a pretty decent movie about the crushing homogeneity of suburbia and how it figuratively and literally steals the lives of marginalized people who dont fit the mold. its not one of my favs (mostly for just like taste reasons) but if that sounds interesting to you you might like it.
similarly, "darlin'" is another movie with a really cool concept whos execution gives me mixed feelings, but i still think is worth a watch. its about a feral teenager who is discovered at a hospital and taken into the care of the local church, which seeks to civilize her in order to turn her into an example of the purifying power of christ
oh and duh how did i not think of this earlier but the book "the stepford wives" is a classic and the 1975 film adaptation is pretty good too. i dont rly recommend the 2004 remake. its not horrible but its far more comedy leaning and kind of undermines its own premise with the ending.
once again sorta loosely related but "the silenced" is a rly good korean horror movie about two girls living in a strict boarding school during the japanese occupation, and what happens when their classmates start to mysteriously disappear. theres not much more i can say without spoiling.
ghjkl anyway these are all i can think of rn. theres honestly probably more. this is a subject im very interested in as you can probably tell so like. yea!
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liv-laugh-die · 3 years ago
Text
||Admiring|| 💖Miya Osamu x Gn!reader
trope: strangers meeting in the park (ik its random bear with me😭)
warnings: its not proofread all the way through (im sorry im tired), so theres probably grammatical errors or typos but other than that none
genre: fluff pretty much just sappy stuff
pairing/s: osamu x gn!reader
wc: about 2.5k
a/n: oh my god idk where i came up with this but i think its cute so :p i hope you enjoy!!
You stared at your blank computer screen, hope of finishing your assignment before its due date at midnight slowly vanishing. 
     The clock on your desk read 11:27pm, the green lines wavering in your vision as your eyes slowly drooped, trying to drag you into the depths of slumber. You wanted to sleep, you really did, but you knew there was no way you could give up writing your essay, even now, knowing you weren’t going to submit it on time, because you would stress too much about it if you didn’t at least try to complete it before the due date. 
     Pushing yourself away from your desk, your chair squeaking against the floor ever so slightly in your dead silent dorm room, you tried to think of some excuse that your professor might believe. You doubted there was anything you could think of, but hey, your professor was better than what your roommates’ had mentioned theirs being, and you were grateful for that. Maybe you could tell him that you were exhausted from working extra hours at your job since you had had to cover your coworker’s shift and that’s why you couldn’t complete your essay on time? Or, maybe you could get away with a simple “I was lacking interest in the material, and couldn’t understand anything, and I didn’t ask for help because I knew that you are such a busy man trying to do so many things at once. Another hopeless near college drop-out wasn’t something I thought you needed on your hands.”
     ....Maybe not the latter.
    You sighed, running a hand through your tangled hair, practically feeling it screaming at you to wash it. You barely had time in the mornings to take showers anymore, and when you took them at night, you never had the strength to wash your hair, always knowing that putting a hat on overtop or throwing on your hoodie would make it seem fine on the outside, and that was good enough for you. As long as you looked at least decent and somewhat presentable.
    Your dorm room was fairly small, like every other one, but the lack of furniture made it seem larger than the rest. Nothing more than you and your roommate’s joint desk, the mini fridge in the corner, and the beds filled the space. You almost tripped over your backpack lying next to the bunk bed pushed up against the wall, falling to what would’ve been inches away from your roommate’s sleeping body.
    In an attempt not to disturb them, you tiptoed through the room, stepping over the occasional heap of clothes or homework, until you reached the bathroom. You fumbled over the door knob before almost tumbling into the small space. Glancing in the mirror, you didn’t fail to notice your messy hair, the dark circles tracing beneath your eyes, or the way you looked like you were seconds away from passing out. The sound of running water rang in your ears as you turned on the sink faucet, cupping your hands together and bringing your face down to meet them, rubbing the cold water all over you in an attempt to keep you awake for just a few moments longer.
     Your eyes returned back to the mirror as you sighed at your dripping wet face. There was no way possible you were going to finish your assignment on time. You knew it, your roommate knew it before they passed out, and you had noticed your professor’s wary glance this morning in class as a sign that he knew it too.
     An idea sprang into your head, part of you dreading the optimism that seemed to seep through your brain slowly. You didn’t feel like being energetic right now.
---an hour later---
You weren’t exactly sure how, when, or why you decided it would be a good idea to take a shower (you did end up washing your hair, thank god), get your things together in your bag, and head to the off-campus coffee shop (since the one on-campus had already closed), but you found yourself with a warm cup of coffee in hand as you exited the shop, the cold midnight air enveloping you in an unwelcome embrace.
     You shivered. The only thing your spontaneous brain had forgotten had to have been your jacket, the one thing your normal brain would’ve remembered if it weren’t already past midnight and if you weren’t majorly sleep-deprived.
     You most certainly weren’t done with your essay yet, nor was there any possible way for you to finish it on time since it was now approximately thirteen minutes past the due time, but you let yourself breathe for now.
     There weren’t many people out at this hour, and it made the usual busy city streets seemed like a ghost town. There were a few restaurants still open as you strolled along the sidewalk, their lights responsible for illuminating more than half the area in front of you. You passed by an onigiri shop your friend had recommended to you, but you just weren’t that hungry. Most nights, you’d kill for a midnight snack, but your single shot of espresso coffee was satisfying your needs for now.
     You decided to head to the park after seeing a rabbit hop its way across the vacant street and into the bushes in that direction. The fresh air was nice and cool against your dry and croaky lungs, and your ears needed a different sound than that of you miserably attempting to touch type quickly, your fingers rapping against the keyboard with vigor.
     A stream nearby flowed softly, the dripping of the water against the rocks complimenting the noise of the crickets chirping in sync just downstream. Your footsteps cut through the grass slowly, not bothering to follow the stone path. The park was a nice change of scenery. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d been here by yourself in peace, it was always you and your rambunctious friends who ran through every now and then just to see the dogs running through the sprinklers, or the occasional poor cat whose owner dragged them out into the daylight for exercise. This was peaceful, though, and you appreciated that.
     A few more rabbits crossed your path, giving you that wide-eyed, side glance before darting off into the darkness, outside the reach of the lampposts emitting light. The sound of the stream soon faded out as you continued to walk through the park, sipping your coffee every so often. The warmth from your cup was soon dying out, and you figured you’d have to start walking back to your university sooner or later. Maybe you could crash at your friend’s house who lived just off campus, though you had forgotten your phone back at your dorm and had no alarm, no laptop to complete your work, and no contact with anyone else who might worry where you’d be. You had really no choice but to trek back to your dorm in the darkness, cutting your peaceful visit to the park short.
     You let yourself have a few more minutes of stress free relaxing as you sat down on a bench just before the ground let out into a downhill slope overlooking the rest of the city below. The trees around you swayed in the breeze, and for a moment, you thought it was the wind talking, and not an actual human being who had somehow made his way beside you without gathering your attention.
     “Didn’t think anyone else would be up at this hour,” the stranger mumbled. You glanced up, almost startled that, indeed, someone else was actually awake and strolling through the park.
     The boy couldn’t have been much older than you were, maybe the same age. He had his hands stuffed in his jacket pockets, the wind tousled his dark hair ever so slightly, and the moonlight played along, illuminating his face just so you could actually see how gorgeous he was.
     You cleared your throat, averting your eyes back to the ground as you shifted over, creating more space on the bench in case he wanted to sit down beside you. “I decided to actually take care of myself for once and give myself some time to breathe before facing the wrath of my professor tomorrow when he finds out I didn’t turn in my essay on time.” You let out a low, breathy chuckle, not exactly sure of what would happen next.
     The guy sat down on the bench next to you, though he made sure to give you some personal space, which you were grateful for. He laughed along with you a bit, and you could tell just from his tone just how tired he really was.
     You gave him a side glance, raising an eyebrow. “So, what the stressful thing that brought you here in the middle of the night?”
     He smiled half-heartedly, eyes trained on the moon. “Work stuff. Jus’ been busy, I guess.” He shrugged. 
     You waited for him to continue on, but he stayed silent. You didn’t complain, though. Wasn’t your whole reason for coming out here in the dead of the night for some quiet? Plus, it wasn’t awkward either. You were comfortable sitting next to this stranger.
     “What do you do for work?” You waited a little longer than necessary to ask, but he didn’t seem to mind the long pause.
     “I own a restaurant a few blocks away. I love the job, it’s just tiring havin’ to deal with rude customers like my brother who won’t get the hint and get out sometimes. I got into an argument with him earlier today and he just wouldn’t shut it.” He rolled his eyes and took his hands out of his pockets, making eye contact with you as he went on about his day, and you couldn’t help but smile at his passion. “The guy thinks he can just walk in when I’m working with a new employee and just act like he runs the place! Quite stupid if you ask me. Such a jerk, he is. Thinkin’ about just banning him from the place, really.” 
     You snorted. “He really bugs you that much, huh?”
     The guy smirked at your laugh, admiring it, though you would never had guess that was what flashed across his face in a million years. He nodded. “Yeah, ‘course I love ‘im ‘cause he’s my twin and my best friend, but he really knows how to annoy the hell outta me.” He shrugged. “Maybe I’ll just get a sign in the window that says “no shirt, no shoes, no service” and cross it out and write my brother’s name instead,” he reasoned, and the pondering look in his eyes made you wonder if he was actually considering the idea.
     You smiled. “You’re funny.”
     “You say that like ya weren’t expectin’ it.”
     A laugh made its way out your lips. “Well, when you’re approached by a stranger in the middle of the night you sort of expect the worst.”
     The guy glanced off in the distance, away from you, furrowing his eyebrows. “Sorry, didn’t think of that comin’ off that way.” He shrugged a shoulder. “Guess it’s a good thing I’m funny then, and not some creep, eh?”
     You nodded, the smile on your face not fading as he changed topics.
     “So, what’s your essay on? Any way I can help ya finish it?”
     You shook your head dismissively. “Oh, no. It was due thirty minutes ago.” You quickly explained the topic you were writing about in class before getting side tracked. “My professor had said he would allow it to be turned in the next morning, but I doubt he actually meant it.”
     He smiled a wide grin, making butterflies flutter in your stomach. “You go to the university nearby, right?” 
     You nodded in confirmation, raising an eyebrow. “If I’ve got any luck, there’s a chance you go there too?”
     He laughed a little, shaking his head. “Nah, I don’t, sorry. I’ve visited campus a few times because some of my friends go there, but I just usually focus on work.”
     His gaze was tilted upwards towards the sky, and you couldn’t help but admire how the exhaustion still shone in his eyes, but somehow that same passion gleamed there too just mentioning what he did for a living. You wished you were that passionate about something that would actually support you financially in the future and make you happy.
     When he glanced back at you, you were still taking his essence in, and he made a look of confusion. “What?”
    You shook your head, chuckling. “Nothing. I just admire that you can dedicate yourself to something and make it seem so easy.” He looked at you, interested to hear what you had to say, even though you were sure you couldn’t be the first person to tell him this. “I haven’t even known you for more than ten minutes and I can already tell you’re passionate about what you do and if you’re stressed about it, it must mean you’re dedicated to seeing your work through, and that’s more than enough to admire and appreciate, especially when that can be so difficult sometimes.” You finished your short tangent, looking back up at him to see him staring intently at you, seemingly in awe of what you’d just said. You felt a blush creep onto your face as you quickly blurted out, “Sorry- I didn’t mean to be so straightforward and weird like that- I sound like some crazy secret admirer or something...”
     The crickets chirped in the silence between the two of you, and it felt like it would never end.
     “Y’know, I wouldn’t mind havin’ a secret admirer. I mean, wouldn’t be so secret, but...” You saw the smile creep up onto his face. “It’s nice being appreciated. Nobody really tells me that kind o’ stuff, so... thanks, I guess.” 
     The heat on your cheeks didn’t go away by any means, but you grew more comfortable with it as you mumbled, “Maybe I wouldn’t mind admiring you.”
     Now, it was the boy’s turn to blush, and you smiled at how his cheeks grew redder with every passing second, and how his subtle grin spoke a thousand words he didn’t need to say.
     “Miya Osamu.” The boy’s hand came into your view as he extended it for you to shake. “I own Onigiri Miya across from the grocery outlet.”
     You smirked, grasping his hand in yours as you said, “L/N Y/N. I own an official license for being a horrible driver and an ID that proves I’m a sleep-deprived college student and that’s about it.”
     He laughed, shaking your hand and standing up, letting go too soon for your liking.
     Because for some weird reason, his hand felt right in yours.
     Osamu said a quick goodbye, mentioning something about how he should get going and how you should get some sleep before he disappeared down the stone path back into the darkness.
     You stood up not too long after he’d left, your coffee now entirely cold as you plopped the half full cup into the trash can on your walk back to your dorm, not needing the pathetic warmth anymore. Your heart was beating fast and the feeling of Osamu’s hand resting in yours lingered on your palm, and that kept you warm enough.
     Maybe you’d be visiting that onigiri place your friend recommended to you a little sooner than you’d originally planned, and maybe more often than you would’ve expected.
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bitchiha · 5 years ago
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S/O walking in on kakashi, iruka, and yamato (separate ofc) masturbating? 👉👈
A/N: HI BLESS YOU FOR THIS I REad THIS AND I JUST HAD TO TYPE IT OUT ASAP because Wowowowowo
✎ (NSFW) S/o walking in on them masturbating 
Kakashi
This guy is horny 24/7 so when you’re not around he’s kinda like... shit, now what? Like you’re not there to help him out and he’s hard as a rock.. So he just goes at it LMFAO
He probably jacks off a lot when you’re away on missions, just because - as I ruthlessly state in every possible kakashi headcanon I write - he’s horny!!!!!!!!
Honestly like he’s always horny, sometimes he can’t help himself
So yeah, he does it all the time, you just haven’t happened to catch him in the act. Until now lol.
You had left a few days ago on a mission leaving your shared apartment to himself. It’s about 10 pm and he’s reading Icha Icha in bed and there is an especially steamy scene going down and he can’t stop thinking about doing the contents in the book to you..
Having you ontop of him right now with your hands on his chest for support as you ride him, tits bouncing with every movement..Then he thinks of your face, with your jaw slightly open from the way his dick is making you feel..
Annnnd.. now he’s got a boner
Doesn’t even panic because he's used to it, hes just like “oh well, guess I’ll have to do something about this myself.” He was half expecting himself to have to do this at some point in your absence.
He was in a t-shirt and sweats, so he just sits up quickly and takes the shirt off, tossing it on the foot of the bed as he stands up, grabbing one of your panties from your wardrobe. He took the white lacy ones (they’re his favourite) and lays back down on the bed against the pillows.
Pulls his dick out slowly, shoving his briefs and sweatpants down a little bit, too eager to actually rid himself of all his clothes.
Then he reaches for his lotion and lets be real, he has lotion on the bedside table. So, he reaches over and puts some on his hands, wrapping your panties up around his cock and gets down to business.
Starts slowly and squeezes his eyes shut, he doesn’t even have to try hard to picture you ontop of him because he literally thinks about it all the time when he’s in these moods. I told you he’s literally always horny.
As he picks up the pace he becomes a real groaning mess. Afterall he needs some sounds to make it seem real.
He starts dirty talking out loud and acting like he’s talking to you.
“Fuck, y/n.” “You take my dick so well.”
His head is thrown back and he’s getting really close.
He’s so caught up in pleasuring himself that he doesn’t hear the door to your apartment open or the sound of you calling his name (if he did, he probably just thought it was his imagination.)
Then you call out again and your voice is getting closer, it seems real this time, so he opens his eyes and as he does he sees the doorknob to the bedroom turning and his hands are still pumping his cock, so he just kind of freezes.
“Kakashi? im home! The mission finished early-“
You open the door to see a sweat soaked Kakashi with his head thrown back on the pillows and his bare chest tightening as his stroking stopped hastily. Not to mention his favourite pair of your panties around his cock being used as stimulation.
He just ares at you, lifting his head and panting slightly. He doesn’t bother to try and cover up what he was doing because there was no way you didn’t hear him just say, “your such a fucking whore for me” before you opened the door.
Honestly, your blushing face just turns him on even more and so he recovers from the shock pretty quickly lol, he says something like, “oh thats good, I’ve got something I need you to take care of.”
Then it just leads to classic horny Kakashi sex
Yamato
Okay Uhm hes also really fucking horny.
You two are on a mission together and you’re setting up camp for the rest of the night in one of his woodstyle jutsu houses. 
It was a really hot day and so you told him that you needed to go wash up in the lake.
Man this guy has been crushing on you since you two first met when he was assigned to Team 7 by Tsunade, but he gets so nervous whenever he tries to ask you out. 
You just fluster him all the time and it doesnt help that he is usually horny as fuck. So as he lays back on one of his wood style chairs and starts thinking...
The thought of you stripping down, unclasping your bra and slowly pulling your panties down before slipping into the lake and washing yourself only made his unbearable desire even worse.
Plus he has a thing for tits so he’s imagining little water droplets slowly sliding down your hardened nipples, courtesy of the cold water.
Before he knows what he’s doing he’s reaching for the waistband of his pants and yanking them down.
He’s jerked off loads of times before so he knows what he’s doing lolololololol
Doesn’t have lotion though so he just resorts to his pre cum and spitting on his hands.
Starts off a little faster than he usually does because he’s kinda rushing since you may be back anytime soon. That low-key turns him on even more though.
Definitely thinking about fucking you in the lake
Can’t help the moans, I mentioned this before and I’ll say it again, hes pretty loud when he’s getting down to business
Mumbles some dirty shit under his breath and it’s actually 10000% hotter than you would imagine
Like it’s all breathy and his head is tilted back with eyes eyes squeezed shut and omfgggg you can see his Adam’s Apple moving slowly and hdhdhsjsjsjsjshsh ugh wow
“Ngh, y/n... you like that?” “Such.. such a good girl for me.”
Can’t hear anything over the sound of him moaning and the pumping of his cock
So he doesn’t even realize you’ve walked into the house because you forgot your towel and are standing right outside the bedroom door where he is jacking off and thinking about fucking you senseless in the lake
You have to walk right up to him and stand directly in front of him, he senses someones presence so he opens his eyes and his jaw drops at the sight of you and his movements freeze.
“I- Y/n..”
He’s so embarrassed omg, tries to cover up, but you stop him because let’s be real.. now you’re horny as fuck too
And then he actually does fuck you in the lake <3
Iruka
Okay so basically Iruka is a closet horney. Like let’s be real hes also touch starved as hell.. The only difference between Yamato, Kakashi and him is that Iruka can’t communicate his horniness.. poor guy
So when you’re out for the afternoon helping Naruto buy groceries for actually decent prices and forcing him to buy vegetables, hes alone by himself.
It’s the weekend and he’s already caught up on marking work for the academy, so he lets his mind wander and starts thinking about what a great mom you were gonna be for their kids.. then he starts thinking about the act of having kids..
Now he’s all worked up lol
He doesn’t want to do it
He really doesn’t want to, but he can’t stop thinking about you kissing up the column of his throat or straddling his waist and grinding down on him while he groans underneath you and well.. he gets uncomfortably hard.
Decides to lay there and maybe it will go away
It doesn’t
He decides to take a shower, maybe that will help him calm down
Big mistake 
Because now, as he’s showering he’s thinking about YOU showering and gosh he feels like such a pervert but he can’t help himself and he keeps thinking about all the things he wants you to do to him in the shower
Gives in and grabs his length frustratedly and just starts at a very fast needy pace, wanting to get it over with, which is kinda painful at first but he doesn’t care he just needs to get rid of this feeling.
As he starts getting close he can’t help the volume of the panting and groans leaving his mouth
Which alarms you as you enter your apartment. Dropping your grocery bags and locking the door to the house behind you.
“Iruka?” You call concernedly as you make your way to the washroom, the door left ajar in his haze to rid himself of his flustered state
That’s when you see him, water pouring down his body as he desperately pumps at his dick. His heads bent downward as the water falls into his hair and onto his neck, trailing down his back.
My gosh girl... like wow whatta sight
And his cheeks are red because he’s blushing about all the things he’s thinking of, literally wowowow
He still doesn’t know you’re there because you’re hiding behind the door and your practically drooling at the shit he’s muttering
“Dont s-stop.” “Y/n... ngh... please, let me cum in you.”
Then you swing the door open because you can’t handle it anymore
His head snaps up immediately and his hands fall away from his dick and attempts to cover it as if that was gonna prove he wasn’t just moaning your name and jacking off in the shower.
Honestly he just stays frozen like that staring at you wide eyed and he most definitely was about to cum just before you swung the door open so his cock is twitching
He apologizes profusely but you shake your head and start ridding yourself of your clothes too because you’re just as horny as he is now
I mean who wouldn’t be lol
“How about I give you the real thing right now, Iruka?”
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floatinginwords · 4 years ago
Text
Saved by the Devil (8/?) - Tommy Shelby
Summary: you go missing and a lot of people get worried
Paring: Tommy Shelby x fem!reader (Not romantic..yet)
A/n: I actually wasn't gonna post today but this chapter fell out of me. Its funny how some days are tougher to write and others its like riding a wave. I hope everyone has a wonderful day :)
The man with the busy eyebrows and mustache called himself Inspector Campbell. A fucking police officer. When you came too you found yourself tied to a chair, ropes around your wrist and legs, tight against the skin cutting off blood circulation. He didn’t ask questions first. No first, was the punching against your ribs and stomach. Then your face. He didn’t give you no breaks, not like he would give you any.
 “I think me and you have gotten fairly acquainted with.” The inspector say his foul breath reaching up your nostrils. Blood dribbled down your chin and nose. It was you could taste.
His men have left the room, on his orders of course. He leans on his cane as he stares at you from above. A evil smirk on his face as if he was some god looking down at his pitiful creations. You spit blood at his shoe.
 He grabs your face harshly, you face scrunching up like a fish. “Tell me what you were doing with Thomas Shelby. Or I can make this night a whole lot painful for you.”  He throws you back and all you do is glare at the man. Not saying a word. Not even huffing a sound.
 The inspector laughs. And walks out the door. You see him point to you with his cane as he talks to the other men that were abusing you moments ago.  You brace yourself for the inevitable. The torture last for hours.
 ******************************************************************************************
 No ones seen you for three days. Ada, the first night you didn’t comeback, called Trinity. but she hadn’t seen you since the morning. The next day Ada and James went out looking through the streets at your usual spots. You didn’t have any Ada just wanted to feel as though she was doing something. You didn’t have any family or any other friends. Except one other person who may know your whereabouts. So on the third day of no trace of you, with a little nagging and encouragement from James and Trinity, Ada decided to make a call.
 *******************************************************************************************
 Over at May Careltons mansion, Thomas Shelby listens half heartedly to the woman discussing the progress on his horse. He could care less at the moment. He’s just thinking of ways that he could stay the night. He wasn’t a fool, he knew of Mays attraction to him. It benefited him in more ways than one.
 “Excuse me, Mr. Shelby,” A maid interrupts May in the middle of whatever it was that she was saying, “You have a phone call.”
 “I’m sure they can leave a message.” His eyes not leaving Mays
 “Its your sister, she sounds urgent.” The maid says.
 With that thought in mind, Tommy excuses himself from May.
 “Ada this better be important.”
 “Where the fuck are you,” Ada screeches over the phone, “Ive been trying to contact you everywhere and Polly tells me your-“
 “What is it-“
 “(Y/n) is missing.”
 Tommy swallows hard. “I’m sure she’s around somewhere ada. How long its been?”
 “Three days. No ones seen her. Tommy please, Im worried.”
 Three days ago was when he last saw you. When you agreed to go to dinner with Alfie and Arthur You had left the car without another word. He wanted to follow you but decided against it. He was regretting it now.
 “Ada, just calm down. Ill ask some boys to go look for her okay?” He reassures his sister over the phone promising to find you.
He hangs up.
 “Is everything alright?” May asks from behind him. Her eyes were hopeful looking at him. She too was hoping he would stay though that was something she would never admit out loud.
“I have to go, family emergency.” He says. Turning his back on her without another thought.
***************************************************************
He didn’t have to leave. He knew that. He could have stayed with May have her fill that hole within his heart that Grace had left about a year ago. He owed nothing to you. He kept telling himself this over and over as he drove back, pushing the speed way past its limit. He begins to reminisce about your first meeting. You were nothing but a chess piece to him at the time but you surprised him a lot in that first meeting. Especially when you didn’t take that money he offered. He was confused to say the least. Everyone took free money. You didn’t. He remembers seeing you again at the Eden club. He though he would never see again. But there you were. He couldn’t not talk to you. He just had to. He knew he hurt you with his words. He didn’t apologize. He never apologizes. He remembers finding out Ada had a roommate. Imagine the surprise on his face when he realized it was you. Of course Thomas Shelby was always in control of his emotions so it never really showed. He was distrustful of you as he always is with people. But you showed something since your first introduction that most people didn’t show their entire lives; Honesty. And he liked that about you. He believed you when you said you didn’t work for Sabini anymore. (Of course he had his people look into it after to be 100% sure) He trusted you to go to meet his brothers, be in the same car as them, come to an auction. He remembers seeing you bloody and a mess. Guilt and rage had filled him up. He couldn’t hold himself back from shooting the guy. When he stitched you up, he liked that you tried to make conversation. You knew when to back up, you never pried. He didn’t know if that was fear of him or if that was just you. He hoped the latter. He liked the way you said Mr. Shelby, though he often wondered how his first name would sound falling off your lips. Thomas Shelby pushes these feeling aside as he drives. He tells himself he just doing this as favor to his sister and because you can be very valuable. But as he drives into the city, a piece of his mind whispers that that just might not be the only case.
 *****************************************************************************************
 Three fucking days. You couldn’t believe that that’s how long it lasted. The torture, the beatings. They released you on the thought that you really didn’t know anything. You never said a word. They drove you out to the fucking country side and dropped you off like you were trash. You were never more humiliated in your life. You walked, each step bring you pain and anguish. But you kept going.
 ‘Its Friday’ You think to yourself. You never got to call to confirm if you were going on that dinner. You laugh at yourself. Out of all things to worry about.
 You find a little pond as you were walking and attempt to wash your face off all the dirt and blood. You looked half decent.
 It took you till sundown to get back into London. People in the streets gawked at your face. You knew you were bruised pretty bad. Worse than before thanks to the inspector. The stitches on the right side of your body were now leaking. You can see the blood drip slowly through your hand. You sigh. Its always one problem after the next.
Once in front of the house, you see all the lights on. Something you knew Ada hated. You see multiple people moving about and you curse underneath your breath. The last thing you wanted was to interact with people. Someone looks through the window, a young boy you didn’t recognize.
 “Is that her Ada?” You hear the boy loudly say not keeping his eyes off of you.
 As soon as the boy says that, a multitude of people rush out to the window to look out followed by a rushing to the door. Ada being the first to run into you, bear hugging you.
 “Where the hell have you been?” She cries out.
 You stay silent, your arms limp across your sides. No energy left to pick them up or say anything. You wished at that moment to escape into eternal darkness forever. You see a bunch of people behind her mostly men. All in black caps and coats.
 ‘Peaky blinders.” You think. You step back from Adas hug and move up the stairs toward the house. The men spread apart not wanting you to push through them. You walk up the rest of the stairs to your room slowly. You can feel all their eyes burn into your back.
 Once you reach your bedroom, you sit on your bed and stare at the empty wall. You couldn’t get the inspector eyes out of your head. It was like he enjoyed watching the life get beaten out of you. He talked a lot.  You replay the last three days in your head trying to piece together what that crazy old man was talking about as he was ‘interrogating’ you
 ***************************************************************************************
 As tommy walks through Adas door the first thing he realizes is that it seems that everyone is fucking here instead of doing their jobs. He watches them lounge about, eating and drinking away his sister’s stuff. He’s about to yell at them when Ada puts a hand on his shoulder.
 “Tommy She came home.” She says, he notices a lack of smile on her face.
 He raises an eyebrow.
 “She looks like she’s been beaten all over. I mean I only saw her face but the way she was walking…” Ada trails off biting her lip.
 “Im gonna talk to her.”
 “Tommy I don’t think-“
 Hes already at the top of the stairs before she finishes her sentence. Its not hard to figure out which room is yours. For reason being your room is the only one open. He sees your figure sitting up just staring at nothing in the dark. He clears his throat, not wanting to scare you with his unknown presence. You don’t turn around. He takes slow steps around to sit next to you on the bed. You both face the wall.
 “Its Friday,” you break the silence, “I apologize for not calling about dinner.”
 Right, he almost forgot that Alfie and Arthur were meeting right now.
 “Never mind that,” You suddenly get up as he talking, limping around the room, “what are you doing?”
 You light a candle on the other side of the room. He sees how bad your bruised face is in the light. And the blood trail your leaving with your freshly open hand.
 “(y/n), you should go see a doctor.” Thomas says standing up.
 “I’ve been through worse, Mr.Shelby.”
 “Who did this to you?” You notice the look of controlled anger on his face.
“Inspector campbell. Know him,” You ask sarcastically,” cause he really doesn’t like you.”
 You laugh and wince, the action hurting your ribs immensely, ”oh and he sure talked a lot. Kept mentioning a general, if I knew him, if I seen him, if you told me his name,” you pause, “what are you planning to do with a general?”
 He doesn’t answer you. The clocks in your brain keep turning. “Cause there’s only one thought that comes to my head.”
 “Why did he question you?”
 “Cause you took me to the fuckers house. And your being followed by the way.” A pain strikes through your head the more frustrated you become.
 “You should lie down.”
 “What did you get yourself into?”
 “it doesn’t concern you.”
 “Look at me, how does it not?”
He stares at you and though to you he looks emotionless, inside the feeling of guilt and fear are swirling. You on the other hand cant decipher anything that going on behind those eyes.
‘maybe this what he looks like when he is lost.’ You think. You know you could lend a hand through this, whatever it is. You assume an assassination. One the police are having a hand in themselves. When inspector Campbell was ‘questioning’ you, you noticed how it didn’t seem like he cared for the generals life but feared of who got a whiff of the info. It seemed that Mr. Shelby was getting something from it, maybe with you helping so can you. A ticket out of here perhaps.
 “what do you want?” He says shrugging.
  “I want to help.”
read pt.9
Tags
@captivatedbycillianmurphy @evelyn-4034 @enamouravecleslivresetlechocolat
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tigerdrop · 4 years ago
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hey i just wanna say the long posts genuinely make my day. also can you talk more about gordon freeman character because the way you write him makes me quake in my gay little boots
i would love to talk about gordon freeman. thank u for the opportunity
the first thing i need to communicate about gordon is that this dude sucks. and i say this in the fondest way possible. he is a bitch from the moment he drops into the world until the moment he goes out. if you dont believe me, give it another watch! gordons mouthy and rude for no real reason, at least so far as “being a regular dude on his way into work” goes, and this dude goes around calling his coworkers names with zero provocation. (of course, we all know that the reason is because its a funny guy improv stream that borrows a bit from freemans mind, but im talkin from a character sense.)
but my argument isnt just that gordon freeman sucks. its that he sucks in a very specific way that i find insanely endearing. i love this dude. i love to hate him. hes awful in a very mundane sense - weve all known a guy like this, at least if youve spent too much time online - and its cathartic to watch him suffer because of it.
gordons a smart guy. as written, hes gotta be - hes a recent MIT grad, on his way to work at a top-secret research facility to do weird shit with crystals and theoretical physics. but the thing about smart guys is that theyre often......selectively intelligent. we can see this in the way that he has a hard time navigating his surroundings, and needs the science crew to guide him through it and keep him alive.
this is one of those things that is a natural consequence of somebody going through the game for the first time, but that i am interpreting as “gordon is kind of stupid sometimes”. its uncharitable but its not like he doesnt deserve it. he likes to boss around the crew as if he knows what hes doing, when he often very much does not, and is fond of demeaning their intelligence. hes real bad about this with tommy in particular, treating him like hes a kid whos playing at being a scientist when tommy is actually a decade older than him. all i am saying is that gordon ought to stay humble. hes awful cocky when he perceives himself as better than others.
which, i think, tracks with how cocky he gets when he gives up on the whole “well-meaning citizen” thing and just unloads bullets into people. he puts up a front of being a Nice Guy, you know, just some dude caught in a bad situation who doesnt like seeing his companions obliterate every NPC they come across, but that doesnt stop him from cackling like a fucking madman and mowing down aliens (and soldiers) every once in awhile. when he stops seeing himself as helpless and starts seeing himself as the one in control, the gloves come off. he gets mean. and i think thats very sexy of him
this, among other things, is why i am insistent that gordon freeman is a control freak. he desperately wants to be in control of the situation at all times, shepherding around the science crew primarily by bitching at them, but its of limited success. its futile. sisyphean. tommy, coomer, bubby, and benrey exist almost to torment him with exactly the thing that would make him suffer the most: a gaggle of people running around causing problems for him, but he cant go anywhere without them b/c hes reliant on them to make it out alive.
its perpetual suffering, and its cathartic to watch. and funny, too. and if youre a little weirdo like me, its very, very enjoyable. how twisted up he gets when nobodys listening to him! how sweaty and frazzled he must look. its cute, and it also makes me want to reach through the screen and shake him and tell him to just be a little nicer. he wants control but he doesnt know how to attain it, he doesnt know how to play nice like a real leader. i think its a neat contrast to gordon freeman as we know him in HL2, where he literally is the leader of the resistance and has to live up to it. this is gordon freeman but if he was moe through helplessness.
“helpless” is, i think, a great way to describe him. a core bit of imagery in half life is this sense of railroadedness and helplessness, with gordon freeman being put into play like a chess piece and having no choice but to move forward. and this iteration of gordon leans into that by being totally dependent on the science crew in order to make progress and Not Die. and hes also subject to the whims of benrey, local eldritch weirdo who has basically made it his life mission to fuck with gordon.
gordons anxieties dont help with that. if he wasnt so fun to stress out and fuck with, the science crew probably wouldnt do it so much! too bad for him that they like fucking with him so much that he was driven into a panic attack (multiple times, even, depending on your interpretation). hes got that real neurotic mindset. always worrying about shit that could go wrong, and attempting to exert control over his surroundings in an effort to control the anxiety.
IMO the real way to nail the Neurotic Gordon Freeman Experience is to combine the ever-present anxiety with his pervasive sense of self-loathing. he openly states that he has no friends and nobody seems to like him, and to that, i really gotta say, i wonder why. he doesnt really seem to factor in that hes kind of a bitch, and has way too high an estimation of his own intelligence relative to everybody elses. its really one of the worst ways to be: aware that people dont like you, but unaware of exactly why. if he was like, 10% nicer, he probably wouldnt have had half as many issues getting through black mesa, but also, its funny to see him squawking his way through the game. so, you know.
its stuff like that that makes me headcanon him as a dude with low self-esteem in general. convinced that hes not likable, not attractive, out of his element......impostor syndrome, except that theres some truth to it. this is a guy who truly does not realize how good he has it: he really is just an average shitty dude, and yet, somehow, benrey took a shine to him. some poor motherfucker out there actually likes him and wants to suck his dick. thats dedication
also, i keep bringing up “repression” when i talk about gordon. and hopefully, what ive been talking about helps explain why. he has a strong desire to be a regular dude, not just murdering his way through black mesa, but if hes pushed hard enough he leans into it. gets bossy. picks up a cigar off a dead soldier and takes a long drag, before smacking forzen around with a pistol and ordering him around. gordon freeman is a regular, kind of anxious guy who likes competitive swimming and streaming on justin.tv and making anime references, and he is also a guy who takes a filthy pleasure in making a trained soldier his bitch. and i didnt make up any of this shit - this is purestrain canon, baby. this is a guy with problems
to me, this screams the kind of guy who represses a lot of shit b/c he doesnt feel like its morally decent. you run into this guy a lot online: the wokeboy, the online leftist, the guy who spends too much time on social media websites. (like reddit. i think he would actively use reddit and he would never get any appreciable amount of karma but he never stops posting. its sisyphean! cathartic.) from the way he talks about “bootboys”, i think it tracks. he knows about imperialism, he knows about feminism, but at the end of the day hes your average american white dude who struggles with internalizing it.
a lot of those dudes struggle with sex and gender issues. (dont we all.) when youre trying to be a Good Person(tm), you spend a lot of time thinking about your own relationship to sex and kink and all that shit. and i maintain that a too-online dude who buries a lot of his control freak tendencies would also try to bury a lot of weird sexual shit in an attempt to seem Normal and Well-Adjusted and not like a little freak. i justify this by the sheer number of times gordon blurts out weird sex shit as a joke. there are only two outcomes to making that many piss jokes: either youre secretly a piss guy, or you lathe-of-heaven yourself into becoming one. i will stand by this
ive talked a lot about why this dude sucks. now, let me talk to you about what makes gordon so much fun to write. first things first: hes funny! a subjective evaluation, yeah, but both in- and out-of-character, hes aiming to be funny. and being the straight man to everybody else plays into that whole “helplessness” thing.
secondly: underneath it all, there is a good dude under there. gordon worries when his companions get hurt, he tries to clean them off and patch them up, and hes got his lil leftist heart in the right place. you could even read a lot of his bossy, bitchy demeanor as him wanting to make sure everyone gets out okay and doesnt hurt themselves. when it comes to animals and anti-imperialist sentiment, gordons a pretty good guy.
hes the kind of guy who would probably see a dog on the street and get excited and play with it, but would get really prickly about the correct way to put dishes in the dishwasher. control freak tendencies.
finally, subjecting such a miserable, tormented guy to even more psychological anguish is really, really fun. you feel a little bad for him, but he kind of deserves it. so many problems he goes through are purely of his own making, and if gordon would just relax and quit trying to hard to maintain control - of himself, of the people around him - and own up to having Problems and Issues, he would be a happier guy. but thats why its fun to bend him until he breaks. being a little control freak myself, putting gordon freeman thru psychosexual torment is cathartic.
when it comes to writing his thought processes, the fact that he is canonically some kind of psychotic (yes, i am boldly claiming this. suck me) and i am also canonically some kind of psychotic makes it easier to write what i think his thought processes are. i just give him my brain issues of “getting lost in thought” and “overthinking fucking everything”. a touch of paranoia helps. even if i dont explicitly label him as schizophrenic please know that i am writing him as a paranoid little nutcase at all times because, uh, you write what you know.
paranoid. anxious. of the mindset that everyones out to get him (which isnt helpful when everyone is out to get him). repressed and deeply Not Normal but trying so very fucking hard to be normal and well-adjusted. a control freak with sadistic tendencies who also really, really likes getting bullied by his best frenemy. a hapless little nerd who sounds really cute when his voice starts to break from nerves. and, most importantly, a dumb jock. do not ever forget this.
thats gordon freeman, babey. hope that helps
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argumentl · 4 years ago
Text
The Freedom of Expression Ep 24 - The more its restored, the less like the original it becomes.
K: This is Dir en grey's Kaoru, starting this episode of The Freedom of Expression. Joe san, Tasai san, welcome....*points to Joe with his bare leg showing*..Errr, are you hot?
J: No, I mean, its hot isn't it?
K: Yeh, it is.
J: How do you feel about Summer? Im really bad with Summer!
K: Well, I don't like the heat, but I don't really go outside all that much.
J: Really? By the way, what are your favourite seasons, Kaoru?
K: Autumn and Spring.
J: Well, yeh right? Which do you hate the most? Winter or Summer?
K: Im really sensitive to hot and cold.
J: Oh really?!
K: But, hmm, which one? Maybe Summer is better.
J: Summer is better? Ehh? But in the winter you can always put on extra clothes if you are cold..but in Summer...we have our limits, right?  Summer is...
K: Can't you just put the aircon on?
J: I do...but..
K: If you go outside, right?
J: Outside is also hot, and if you leave the aircon on constantly inside, you'll catch a cold. Its hard, I really don't like summer at all!
T: Haha
J: You're also limited in what you can eat, right? You have no appetite, you get bored of eating soumen noodles every day.
K: Yeh, that does get boring.
J: In winter you can have big hot pots, and all sorts!
K: I eat hot pots in the summer too.
J: Really?!
T: Ehh?
J: Incredible! Ah, but on the other hand, yes, that kinda works.
T: Wouldn't you feel cooler? After eating it?
K: I feel hot.
J: You feel hot? haha.
K: Hahaha
J: Its is hot!
K: I get really hot! Haha
T: Do you eat it with the aircon blasting?
K: Well, even with the aircon blasting, I still sweat a lot.
J: Its hot, right? But doing that feels good? Conversely?
K: What have you been eating?
J: Salad, basically.
K: Did you say you were on a diet?
J: Yeh, my belly is getting round.
K: Weren't you going to the gym?
J: I am going to the gym!
K: Haha.
J: I started with squats, and when I lifted up, it was so hard*1.
K: Hahaha
J: My muscles hurt a lot today. I can't walk up the stairs.
T: Hahaha
K: At 50, you're like...
J: Getting my teeth out...
K: Getting your teeth out..
T: Doing squats...
J: Yeh, well im divorced, and im aiming to remarry, so this is my last spurt. If I havn't reached my goal by age 55...
K: You've entered a plan to reform yourself?
J: Yes, I have.
T: Joe, you're young!
J: If I havn't managed it by 55, I'll give up...*gestures to camera* So, please,  everyone.
K: Why are you smiling?
T: Hahaha
J: I've kinda been wanting to do that.
K: Hahaha
J: Lets cut that bit.
K: No, we'll show it
J: Hahaha
K: We won't cut it, haha. Ok, Joe san. Today's news please.
J: Yes, this is today's news. We talked about this news a little bit once on the radio show, didn't we?
K: Yeh, we did.
J: Right? Well this is news about how "The more it was restored, the less like the original it became". So in Spain, its been disovered that  an amatuer tried to re-touch a famous work of art, and failed twice. The altered work is a oil painting copy of the 17th century piece by the Spanish Baroque artist Bartolomé Esteban Murillo. The title of the work is, 'The Immaculate Conception of Los Venerables'. The owner of this piece, an art collecter based in Valencia, who paid 1200 euros for it, had requested an employee of a furniture repair company to clean the painting. But during the cleaning, the Virgin Mary's face changed. After not one, but two restoration attempts, the painting was completely ruined, and the owner was apparently very angry. So, if you search for it, you will be able to find the images online. We can't show you them here due to the issue of image rights (*On screen text: Search for Spain painting restoration*). But...yehh..
T: Its incredible, isn't it?
J: This is shocking!
K: They weren't looking at how the picture is supposed to be, were they?
T: *Looking at his paper* Is the top picture the first restoration attempt?
K: Yeh, the one on the left is the original state, and on the right is the first restoration.
J: The top right, yeh.
*Lots of giggling*
J: This has zero sense of Maria! It looks like some vandalism.
K: Its looks like those pictures they stick up outside the police box *2
J: This first attempt is bad enough...
K: Its terrible, really bad!
J: But it generally still fits with the original Maria's line of gaze, right?
K: Yeh, but like, you can see the whites of her eyes. The top half is totally black.
J: If this is restoration work, it means they took money for it?
T: ??? *3
J: Really!
K: How did they actually do it though? Normally you have to use a matching colour to the original, and just do it like this, right?*imitates dabbing paint finely*
J: I think so.
K: But it seems like this person has just gone like "Gahhh' *imitates waving a paintbrush around roughly*
J: They re-painted it, right?
K: They are just slapping paint on, you can't see much detail.
J: Re-writing it! Its terrible!
K: They were somehow trying to remember what it used to look like.
J: At least they could have taken a photo..
K: Without that, this third try is never gonna work.
J: Everyone, please search for these images online. The third image is shocking!
T: The second pic is still looking upwards and kinda has a bit of the orininal feel to it, but the third pic is just staring straight forward!
K: Its the same person who did them both, right?
Kami: Um..I just..
J: Ah, Kami is here.
Kami: Um, I had a look at it, but where did her clothes go?
J: Huh? (*looks at paper*) Ohh, her clothes?
Kami: Yeh.
J: In the original, the area from Maria's chest and up is visible, but by the third picture, the clothes cover up to her head. This is awful!
T: Its scary, isn't it?
J: This is...well, where is the real problem? Even this kind of person has the authority to do restorations, even people at this level.
K: I dont know if they had the authority, they were just asked.
Kami: Yeh, the owner asked a furniture business to do it.
J: Yeh, someone from the furniture business came to restore it.
Kami: If you ask a furniture store to do it, this kind of result can't be helped.
K: For sure. ????*4
Kami: Maria got really ugly.
T: Ahh, I see! Originally, they were supposed to be just cleaning it right? Like, removing the dust.
J: Yeh, that might have been it. Like the painting was deteriorating, and in order to stop it getting worse, or something like that. They must have thought it was ok to go ahead and re-paint it.
K: The person who did it was quite eldery weren't they?
J: Ahh, I see.
T: This is crazy
J: But after seeing their first try, they should have given up trying to fix it for a second time. Somehow, that would've been better.
K: The owner shouldn't ask the same person to fix it, right?
J: Right!
K: But, well, it won't go back to its original state will it?
J: No, it won't.
K: Even if a new person could get to back to this (*points at the first restoration attempt*)
J: ??? Its like hell if you keep going, and hell if you stop. In the end, its like ??? *5, it would be no good...Well, its an impressive thing.
K: Yeh, but imagine if you wanted to keep viewing the painting, as for the first restoration,   if you look at it from far away, it kiiinda still resembles the original a bit. But the second one is no good at all.
J: Yeh, its no good. In the first one you can kinda still see that they were trying to paint the virgin mary, but in the second restoration, it looks like an old woman..not even a proper portrait.
T: Her nose is well defined though, haha.
J: Well, yeh...Isn't the Virgin Mary a friend of Kami's?
Kami: Well, the one in the original is my friend. The third one is totally different.
J: Its no good?
K: That kind of old woman, really.
J: Do you consider this to be a profanity? Is this ok?
Kami: Well, its ok, isn't it?
J: Hahaha.
Kami: That kind of thing.
J: Ah, its ok.
Kami: The original is really well painted isn't it?
T: Mm, yeh.
Kami: Yeh, I think its a really good picture.
K: Its a copy though right? There is someone who painted this as a copy?
T: Yeh, there is a proper original.
K: It would be pretty expensive to hire that person to fix it, right?
J: I think they were trying to save money. 140000yen was too much for them. I wonder how much it usually costs to have a painting decently restored? How much did they save?
K: It probably takes quite a long time to do.
T: I think it takes a really long time.
J: Yeah. Well, when they saw how it ended up, it says the owner was angry, well, yeh, he would be angry wouldn't he?
K: Yeh, he would. Cause its his precious painting that he just wanted cleaning.
J: Yes, thats it.
K: I can only laugh at this, haha. Its a total disaster, really.
T: It really is.
J: Well, the lesson to learn from this is that a ricecake maker makes ricecakes. If you want anything repairing properly, hire a professional..otherwise this type of thing will happen.
T: Thats it.
J: Don't be stingy!
T: Its problematic if they pretend to be a pro, then take your money. But in this case they were just a furniture store.
J: Asking a furniture store to do it was the mistake. Why did they ask a furniture store?
T: But they still said, 'Yes, we can do it', right?
J: Hmm, yeah.
K: They had the look of someone who could do it. The owner was fooled.
J: Its like 'The Guild', they may have had the look of a craftsperson. You have to be careful with appearance too.
K: Well, I think we'll finish here. Please subscribe. Thank you very much.
J: Go Hanshin Tigers!
*1, 2 Couldn't make out the last words, but i think its something like this.
*3, 4, 5 Couldn't make out.
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