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whaleofatjme1920 · 3 years ago

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Denying Feelings on the Tiled Floor (Masky X F!Reader)

[Masky X F!Reader]

[Warnings: blood, angst]

[AN: I genuinely dont think I've posted this here before but it's from my quotev and I want it here lots of love <3]

Tim can’t really describe the first moment he knew he felt something for you, only that he did. And he knew the risks that came along with having such feelings.

Hanahaki, it’s a terrible disease, really. Instead of giving flowers to the person you love, you grow them in your lungs. If the person that you’re so willingly throwing your affections at doesn’t return them, you die. The flowers cloud your lungs and unfurl, sprouting and taking root as they invade your chest, making it harder and harder to breathe until you eventually choke.

He wasn’t supposed to have feelings for anyone, especially as a proxy and even more so as a respectable group leader. His job is to guide and lead, not feel softly for someone who might never return his feelings. Tim doesn't really think he even deserves to have these type of warm feelings, if he’s being honest.

Not after he failed to protect Brian. Not after he failed to protect Amy. Not after he failed to protect Sarah. Not after he failed to save Alex. Not after he barely managed to protect Jessica. And certainly not after he failed to do right by and protect Jay. His existence was always bound to be one of suffering, not warm feelings and sly glances at someone he feels so deeply for.

He supposes that’s where the Hanahaki comes in from. He can’t just have warm feelings, he must suffer for those two. The warmth he felt for you was at first a spark, small, floating on the wind from something greater and bigger than he could ever imagine. Then, it took hold on every part of him, consuming him until it was ablaze and the flames licked upwards to the heels of the sky.

It was something he never wanted to feel, something he wanted to shove back. But sometimes, it was pleasant, and sweet, and it lured him in like sailors to a siren song.

Sometimes it was just a little smile.

“Good work today,” Tim complimented as he patted your back, watching as you tiredly stumbled back into the house. “I wasn’t sure we were gonna be able to get that guy but you? You were on it.”

You glanced over your shoulder and smiled at him. “Thanks! He was a slipper bastard, but I make it work,” you giggled.

Tim chuckled and closed the door of the temp house his group was currently staying in. “Get some rest tonight, okay?”

“Why? We have something big tomorrow?” You asked, tilting your head slightly.

He followed you into the kitchen, watching as you began to rummage in the fridge for something cold to drink. “No,” he started. “I just want you to get some rest.”

You poked your head from back out of the fridge, genuinely smiling at him. “Sure thing, Masky.”

His heart skipped a beat.

Sometimes it was your laugh.

It had just been you and Tim in the car coming back from a late night convenience store run. Apparently, the rest of your group wanted to have a movie night but the snacks were severely lacking.

There was music playing in the car but he hadn’t been focused on it all. In fact, he was more focused on you telling him things from your childhood.

“I can’t believe they just let us do that,” you had giggled. “I know senior pranks can get out of hand but I’m certain we cost them thousands in actual damage and even more in water damage.”

Tim chuckled and nodded. “I remember for our senior prank, Hoodie and I got the bright idea to steal three pigs from one of the local farms in the area with a group of other guys, and marked them with a one, two and four,” he explained, watching from the corner of his eye as you began to grin. “So, we let them loose in the school and of course, the staff and the students that weren’t in on the prank spent the entire day looking for pig three-” he’s barely able to get the rest of the anecdote out before you burst into laughter.

Tim’s heart grows softer as he joins you, fighting the desire to hold your hand. You sound so beautiful to him.

Tim knows he can’t deny his feelings. He couldn’t try any harder, and unfortunately for him, he has the inkling you don’t feel the same. It’s painful because he can feel the seeds of that terrible disease spreading further and further, consuming him slowly.

You’ve mentioned it before, not wanting to be in love. Not desiring a relationship and by extension, him.

“I just don’t think I’m up for those kind of things,” you said one night as the two of you say up on the roof together.

He tilted his head slightly to the side. “What makes you say that?”

You shrugged. “I’m a proxy, and I don’t think love is in the roster for people like us.” You giggled slightly and fixed your posture before shaking your head. “I think the only types of people who would work with people like us is people like us. But, even then, I think we’re way too emotionally unstable.” You then paused and looked over to your group leader. “What about you?”

Tim shrugged, a small, sad smile on his face. “I think I’m in agreement with you.” He said it, but he doesn’t mean it. He watched you carefully after he said it, looking for any signs that you wanted to challenge him, and when he didn’t see them, he felt the flowers bloom.

Coughing is absolutely normal for Tim. He’s handled the Operator’s influence for far longer than anyone should, which has been since his childhood. It’s just his body’s natural reaction to being poisoned all those years. But what wasn’t normal was when he started coughing up petals.

Oh how he hates the color pink now. Carnations. They’re pink carnations. He has no idea why they’re pink carnations as you have shown no type of fondness or specific admiration for the type of flower, but they smell so sweet and the color reminds him of you. He tries to smoke his cigarettes more and more in a vain attempt to smoke the roots that have taken hold in his lungs before they consume him in his entirety.

But he knows he won’t stop them, and that he won’t give into that surgery. What’s the use of living if you cannot have the feelings that come alongside it? All of the things that still make proxies human, life, death, love and birth - peace and war? Happiness when you laugh with friends, confusion, anger and somberness. It’s worth it. Every single part of it is worth it. He doesn’t want to lose the warm feelings he has to you either,

Even if it kills him.

It’s not like you haven’t noticed Tim coughing up pink carnations. The way the sparsely blood covered flowers find their ways into vases or in the trash have been greatly concerning you, and as far as you can tell, it’s not from Toby, Brian, or Kate. The only habitual cougher is Tim, and that makes you concerned.

You don’t know how to feel about Tim most days, but you know it’s something sweeter than what should be allowed as a proxy. You’re finally making your decision when you think you’ve almost lost him.

It’s a warm summer night when you finally come to terms with how you feel. You’ve just returned from some kind of ‘cooperation mission’ with Eyeless Jack and Jeff and you are more than exhausted after the mess you had to put up with.

“Anyone home?” You call out. From the kitchen, you can smell fresh pastries. Looks like Kate and Toby have been baking again. You follow the scent and see platters of brownies, cookies and other sweets laid out on the countertops with little sticky notes telling you to only take from the brownies - the rest are for other proxy groups and independents.

You’re just about to pluck one of the fresh brownies when you hear coughing. It’s soft at first, thick, but sounds like normal Tim coughing. You wonder if you should head over and see if there’s anything he needs. “Masky?” You call out again.

He coughs again. “What?” He sounds exhausted.

“Do you need some water?”

“No, I don’t-” he begins to cough violently, and you swear you can hear something falling to the floor as he does so. Tim rumbles around his room, crawling out of bed as he continues to violently cough and to the bathroom.

Worried, you exit the kitchen hastily to see what’s wrong just to see him slinking into the bathroom. “Masky? What’s going on?” You ask in a growing concerned tone, walking down the darkened hall to where the bathroom light shines from under the door.

And there you see it, flowers. Pink in color, carnations. They’re soft under your shoe as opposed to the hardwood. You feel the blood run cold in your veins. “Tim? Tim? Tim, you gotta open up please-” you rush out as you begin to pound on the door.

“Don’t you dare!” He snarls, pushing his weight against the door, still coughing. “I don’t need your hel-” he practically coughs up his lungs as he falls to the floor.

You panic. “Shit, shit, shit!” You cry out as you lean back in the hallway. “I’m coming in!” You know he can’t really hear you as he continues to hack out his lungs, but you kick the door in, bursting it from its hinges. You catch it and practically tear it out of the frame before shoving it back into the hall.

You widen your eyes upon seeing the state of Tim and immediately fall downwards, your hands sliding over his trembling form. There’s blood all over the sink, the mirror, even some of the sub and on the floor. The red drops leave trails down his mouth like snail trails. “Oh my gods,” you murmur as you rest his head on his lap, stopping his skull from knocking around on the tile floor.

“You shouldn’t-” he coughs more. “You shouldn’t be in here!” He’s not able to reprimand you because he’s practically puking up a bouquet.

“Nonsense,” you shrug off, trying to bring him comfort. “What the hell brought this on?” Your fingertips gently trace around his mouth and help claw the budding flowers out. You’ve never hated carnations so much until now.

Tim glares up at you before closing his eyes in pain, feeling the flowers cloud his lungs further. “It’s nothing-”

“Does this look like nothing?” You sound so cross, but it’s just because you’re so worried about him.

A long, pregnant pause passes between the two of you.

You continue to pull the blossoms from his mouth before looking over his form, seeing how his hand is slowly reaching up for yours. “Tim…”

“I know,” he whispers. “I’m sorry, I never meant for you to-”

You shake your head, your hand reaching out to hold his. You grip him before taking his hand warmly up to the side of your face, allowing him to caress your cheek. “Don’t.”

“But it’s true,” he barely manages to wisp out. “I never meant to throw this onto you,” he finishes before weakly coughing up more petals and full budding flowers. He can barely breathe now.

You sigh as you press his hand up to your cheek just a little firmer, letting him feel your warmth before you softly pull him back. “Open your palm, please,” you say softly as your free hand fishes out yet another bundle of carnations.

He weakly nods, closing his eyes and giving into his labored breathing as his lungs compete with the roots and sick blossoms for air.

You sigh once again, a small smile crossing onto your face before you plant a kiss on the center of his palm, remaining for just a moment before allowing him to pull away all on his own. “You always had me you idiot,” you whisper as you watch his fingers curl inwards, gripping the kiss that you had just planted.

Tim looks up at you, starry eyed before resting his hand on your cheek again.

The garden in his lungs begins to wilt.

#masky #masky x reader #masky headcanon #masky x y/n #tim wright #tim wright x reader #tim wright headcanon #creepypasta #creepypasta x reader #creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta masky x reader #creepypasta scenario #angst with a happy ending #angst #hq angst

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theres-an-impulstor-among-us · 4 years ago

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Prompt: Skizz discovers Impulse is a traitor early?

well hello there :D hope this is as good as whatever you had in mind! cuz i dont think i got exactly that lol

...

You whisper to impulseSV: We need to talk. ASAP.

Skizz paces back and forth in his room, anxiously waiting for a response. He hasn’t told anyone what he saw yet; even though he knows he probably should, he just doesn’t want to face it. Something inside him is telling him it’s not true, that there has to be a reasonable explanation. He can’t spread this information before he finds out whether or not it’s true.

impulseSV whispers to you: okay, meet me at my villager hole

Skizz jumps into action and rushes out of the building. He doesn’t tell anyone where he’s going, which might be a big mistake.

He runs all the way to Impulse’s villager hole and bursts in through the non-trapped door. But Impulse is nowhere in sight.

Frowning, Skizz spots a trapdoor with a ladder visible under it that wasn’t there before. He carefully climbs down the ladder and finds himself in an almost pitch black underground room, about the same size as the interior of Dogwarts.

Skizz walks out into the middle of the room, looking around in awe.

“Skizz,” comes Impulse’s voice.

“Gah!” Skizz nearly jumps out of his skin. “Don’t do that! Where are you?”

Impulse materialises out of the darkness. “Hey. Did you come alone?”

“Yeah, I did. I gotta talk to you.”

“So talk.”

Skizz takes a deep breath. “I, uh… I saw you earlier today, meeting with the crastle people. I didn’t hear much of what you said, just something about “gaining their trust”. That… Impulse, you’re on our side, right? You’re just pretending to be friends with them?”

“Yeah, ‘course,” replies Impulse easily. Too easily.

Skizz frowns. “Impulse, please tell me it’s not true. Tell me you’re not betraying us for THEM.”

“I’m not betraying anyone,” says Impulse defensively. “You know me; I’m not capable of that. You… do know that, right?”

“I…” Skizz stares at his best friend. “A few hours ago, I’d have said no. But now… I think you’re capable of anything. Tell me the truth, Impulse. Whose side are you on?”

“Yours, of course.”

“You’re doing it again! Switching on the ol’ Impulse charm and saying exactly what the other person wants to hear. You know that doesn’t work on me, buddy. I’ve known you far too long.” Skizz narrows his eyes. “You’re a mole. You pretended to join us but you’re on their side and you’re gonna betray us for them. Am I wrong?”

After a moment, Impulse wordlessly turns away, all but confirming Skizz’s suspicions.

Skizz’s stomach drops. “Oh, god… I trusted you! You- You traitor!”

Impulse sighs. “This is just like you, Skizz: running over here to confront me alone cuz you couldn’t POSSIBLY fathom that you might’ve been wrong about me. Did it ever occur to you that maybe this world changes people? That you can’t truly trust anyone but yourself?”

“No!” Skizz snaps. “I trust Ren and I trust Martyn and Etho and I DID trust YOU!”

“And that’s gonna be your downfall.”

He suddenly shoves Skizz to the ground. Before his friend can react, Impulse brings his foot down hard on Skizz’s ankle.

Skizz screams as they both hear it crack. The pain is immense; it’s definitely fractured, if not broken completely.

“See the thing is, I can’t have you running around blabbing about this to anyone,” Impulse says casually. “But at the same time, I can’t just kill you because that would show up in chat. So I think it’s time I test out my brand new trap and see how deadly it is.”

Tears of pain and anger fall from Skizz’s eyes as he stares into the cold, harsh eyes of the man he used to call his brother. “Wh-Why, Impulse…? Why would you d-do this to me…?”

Impulse just shrugs. “I’m just playing the game, Skizz. Sorry.”

With that, he turns and walks away into the darkness.

“Impulse!” cries Skizz, his vision completely obscured by tears. “IMPULSE! DON’T LEAVE ME! PLEASE!”

He hears the click of a lever being pulled in the darkness, followed immediately by pistons moving. His breathing quickening, he rolls onto his side and pushes himself up, but as soon as he puts weight on his left ankle, he knows he’s not going to be able to use it.

A familiar growl pierces the air, causing him to freeze.

A zombie.

More growls.

A LOT of zombies.

The first one that appears through the darkness nearly gives him a heart attack. He manages to slice it down with his sword, but by then, three more have ganged up on him. Trying to back away, he finds himself completely surrounded by a horde of at least two dozen zombies.

“NO!” he screams. “HELP ME! SOMEONE PLEASE HELP!”

The zombies’ claws dig into his skin, and at least two of them manage to bite his arms. Players are able to resist being turned into a zombie through a bite but that doesn’t make it hurt any less.

Accidentally putting weight on his injured ankle again, Skizz collapses to the ground and curls up in a ball, trying to protect his head and neck. Impulse was clever; he hurt Skizz’s ankle on purpose so he could neither run nor fight for long.

This is it for him. They’re going to kill him.

All of a sudden, a battle yell echoes in the darkness, followed immediately by the sound of zombies taking damage. Multiple zombies taking damage at once. Someone’s come to save him.

The zombies attacking Skizz move away to target this new threat, but they’re no match for whoever it is. Within a minute, all the zombies in the room have been eliminated.

“Skizz!” comes Etho’s voice. “Are you okay?!”

Severely weakened and on the verge of passing out from the pain, Skizz looks up at his friend, unable to muster the words to reply. His vision is swimming, but he can just about see two figures kneeling beside him.

Etho and Martyn. They came to save him.

That’s the last thought in his mind before he passes out.

…

“-is definitely broken. But not like he fell from somewhere and landed on it. More like someone stomped on it until it broke.”

“What?! Who would do something like that?!” “I don’t know. Hopefully Skizz can shed some light on this when he wakes up. Oh my goodness, Ren, you should have seen how many zombies there were. I don’t think it was a coincidence.”

“So… you’re saying someone tried to murder Skizzle? Broke his ankle so he couldn’t get away from the zombies?”

“Yeah, I think so. And we think it was Impulse, too. Etho and I didn’t see anyone else around except him, and the hole was under his villager place as well, so we- Oh, look! I think he’s awake!”

Skizz lets out a quiet groan, his eyes slowly opening. As his vision adjusts to the light, he registers Martyn and Ren by his side, and the interior of his bedroom back at Dogwarts behind them.

“Hey, Skizzles,” says Ren gently. “How are you feeling?”

Blinking slowly, Skizz looks down at his arms and finds them covered in bandages. Beyond them, he can see his ankle elevated in a cast. Nothing hurts anymore, to his relief.

“Alive,” he rasps. “For good or for bad.”

“What happened?” Martyn asks. “Do you remember?”

“Oh, I remember.” Skizz tries to suppress a sniffle at the traumatic memory. “It was Impulse. He’s a backstabbing traitor and he tried to kill me to stop me from telling you.”

Ren gasps, but Martyn just shakes his head, an anguished expression on his face. “I should’ve known. There were so many little clues but he explained them away so well, I just…”

“He had us all fooled,” Ren murmurs. “I’m just glad we managed to get to you before he got away with murdering you. If he had, we’d never have known, and we would’ve continued to trust him.”

“How- How did you find me?” Skizz asks. “I didn’t tell you where I was going.”

“Etho and I went looking for you cuz we hadn’t seen you in a while,” replies Martyn. “We just happened to be at Impulse’s villager pen when we heard you screaming. Luckily, Impulse had just left and I don’t think he heard you, or he might have tried to kill us too.”

His upper lip curls in an expression of disgust. “We bumped into him right there and it was like nothing was wrong. It makes me sick to think that he was up there chit-chatting to us about his villagers like everything was fine, knowing full well he’d literally just abandoned you to be murdered by a horde of zombies. That goes beyond 3rd Life; that’s… that’s just pure evil.”

Skizz nods slowly. “Yeah, something’s not right with him anymore. Whoever that was… it’s not my Impulse. Something’s changed him.”

“Well, either way, at least you’re alive and his treachery has been exposed,” Ren says. “And we will take our revenge on him for trying to kill you. As soon as he’s red, we take him down.”

“Why wait?” asks Martyn, frowning. “Why not kill him now, while he’s on yellow?”

“Because if we do, he’ll harbour a grudge and try to take revenge on US for killing him once he’s red. And if yellow life Impulse is THAT dangerous, imagine what he can do on red. It’s better to wait and come up with a plan so when he becomes red, we can take him out immediately and prevent further carnage.”

A shiver runs down Skizz’s spine. It feels horrible to be discussing killing his best friend when they had been so close only hours before. Despite everything Impulse has done, he doesn’t actually want him to die. He still loves his brother, no matter what.

Even though he’d love nothing more than to punch him in his stupid face right now.

“Skizz?” says Martyn softly. “You okay?”

Skizz clears his throat. “Y-Yeah. I think I will be.”

Eventually.

#3rd life smp #3rdlifesmp #skizzleman #inthelittlewood #impulsesv #rendog #etho #vaunna’s requests

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zuffer-weird-girl · 4 years ago

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Omfg pls!!!!!!!!! Do an imagine/scenario of feeding Chisaki plssssssssssssss?!?!?!???!?!?!?!?!?!?!

His wrist was already sore from how much he was writing and typing on his laptop for about seven hours... without a single break.

The deadline was tommorow and fue to some... specific issues and problems with other gangs, he had done something he usually wouldn't do.

Forget the work Pops had inquired him to do.

When he was walking towards hiis bedroom yesterday and saw there the work he should have done his blood ran cold and he immediately went to you, explaining that if anyone bothered him while working on that he was going to overhaul it without regrets... not that he had anyway.

You, the sorce of his sanity and humanity side, understood completely and already told him you wasn't going to bother either and warn the other subbordinates.

He wouldn't voice out loud due to his pride... but you could never bother him. He could roll his eyes and scoff whenever he wanted,but he treasure when you entered on his office and scared his headache away.

But right now he couldn't even think about what bring him happiness, because of this stupid and fucking work he had forgotten.

His headache was just killing him. He even thought that fue to stress his hives were getting back on his skin, but it seemed like they only appeared when something, or someone, touched him or when he really was angry.

The knock on his door made his frown deep on his forehead as he tighten his hold on his pen and clenched on his side of his head with a growl.

Or you didn't warned everyone or someone was begging to be killed.

"Get out." He snarled before going to his laptop and typing furiously. The door opened and he overhauled his glove out of anger and turned abruptly on his chair with wrath.

"I said GET O-" he stopped talking when he saw you looking at him, on the middle of closing his door with a tray of what he suspected it was food on top of it.

"Work is getting on your head again?" You giggled while finally closing the door. He only 'tsked' and turned back to the screen.

"I thought you wouldn't interrupt me while working?" He asked in a tired out voice as you placed gently the tray down on his desk.

"Yeah. But you missed dinner." You tapped on his desk to catch his attention, but he didn't even budge from his position as his fingers worked on the keyboard. "Aren't this unhealthy?"

"A human being can get past three days without eating. I will be fine." Chisaki grunted before going back to his hand writing.

"Aham." You deadpanned at your boyfriend before smilling at the idea you thought. You hummed, while grabbing the hashis and picking at the dish you made for him along with a little dessert.

"You sure you don't want any?" You cooed as he chuffed.

"Just leave it there if you insist. But I dont have time to eat right now. I have been drinking water, and that's enough."

"Such a shame..." you muttered "And here I thought you were going to like the onigiri and the sukiyaki... I thought they were a favorite of yours..." you tried to contain your smirk when his hand stopped for a few seconds at the mentions of the dishes but returned to his work again.

"Oh, and for your sweet tooth there this little cherry tart here and-"

"I will eat it but not right now (Y/n)." He grunted "Understand that."

You pouted at his behaviour and how much insisted he didn't need to eat. He hadn't left his office for hours, only to go to the bathroom, and he was only drinking water. And he was the one who was suppose to extra care about health? Ha.

Another idea popped into your head, and you bitted your lip in anticipation as you went to grab a seat to sit right next to him and grab the hashis once again. You poked him on the shoulder and you could feel his anger starting to pick up until he froze when you gently pushed the mask down holding one slice of the beef between the hashis.

"Do I look like a newborn to you?" He asked in venom as you merely giggled.

"No, but you do act like one sometimes." You almost burst in laughter and the ultimate offended and angry face he made before you tried to aim the hashi on his mouth but only for your wrist to he grabbed by his hand.

"No." He growled, narrowing his eyes while gritting his teeth when you put your puppy eyes to good use. After a few minutes of staring he just scoffed and let go of your wrist, only to look at the opposite direction of where you were in front of him.

"You're such an brat." He grunted while you hummed.

"Uhum and you need to eat. Say 'aah'~!" You chirped as his pale cheeks turned a bright pink before he slowly and hesitantly parted his lips just enough for you to feed him.

You smiled brightly as he munched and returned to work with a grumpy face as you giggled at how his cheeks were puffed.

You went to get up to leave him alone but soon you were interrupted by a mumble and saw your stoic boyfriend, still freacking working, and with his lips partially parted.

You couldn't help but to laugh while he only closed his mouth and glared at you.

"So you want feeding now?" You manage to speak thorugh laughter as he only put his hands on his temples.

"Why do I love you again?" He groaned as you wiped your tears off and sitted besides him once again.

"Sorry." You giggled while picking the uttensiles again "Here comes the airplane~" you started to have another fit of laughter as he sent you a dark look.

"Don't test your luck with me now (Y/n)."

#overhaul x reader #overhaul #chisaki kai x reader #chisaki kai #bnha x reader #bnha characters #bnha villains #bnha imagine #bnha #zuffer writings

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marauder-exe · 5 years ago

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Sick of it- Aaron Hotchner x Reader

Request: I’m not sure if you’re taking requests rn...but I would love to see a fic with hotch where maybe he has feelings for the reader who’s in her 20s and she gets injured on the job, leaving her deaf. She’s able to continue working with the BAU but can’t do any extensive field work. She just gets sick of everybody questioning her capability of doing her job. Sorry if that’s too much lol 🤷🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ Word Count: 1.1k

Warnings: bomb explosion, loss of hearing, angsty but happy ending kinda.

A/N: Welcome back to: Reid loves cliffhangers (in actuality she can just never finish fics)

“Hotch I've told you I'm fine, We got everyone, we detonated all the bombs. Morgan and I are doing a last clearing of the scene, then we’ll be on our way back” You spoke into the phone while continuing to search the area. “Okay, I just-” He hesitated. He couldn't let you know about his feelings. “Your one of the greatest agents this team has ever had, we need you.” He decided to say instead. He always covered his feelings with business. He sighed on the other end of the phone. “Thank you, Aaron” He could've sworn his heart skipped a beat every time you called him Aaron. “i am fine though I prom-” Your words were soon cut short when an ear-splitting explosion echoed through the receiver, quickly followed by a scream of your name from Morgan. His heart dropped. There was a deathly silence. “(Y/N)! Morgan! Whats going on?” His heart clenched at the thought of anything happening to you. He had gained feelings for you around year ago. You had been transferred from Interpol, and quickly proved to the team that you where everything you got cracked up to be. The day he realised it, he felt so guilty. You were 24, he had feelings for a 24 year old. You where old enough to be his daughter. He couldn't do that to Hailey. He tried to repress his feelings. Push so much stuff down on top of them, so he couldn't feel them any more. It never worked though. He turned around to the startled faces of his team, confused by his shout. “Hotch? Whats wrong?” JJ asked, taking in his pale face. “Its-Its (Y/N). i-i heard an explosion and then Morgan shouting her name and then-and then nothing” He dropped the phone he was holding, as if the shock had just knocked him back into action. He ran from the small police room that the team had set up into his jeep. Turning it on, ignoring the shouts of his team, he sped off down the street. “JJ, update the sheriff, me and Reid will go after him” Emily said, loading into her jeep.

The wait was horrendous. It was perhaps the longest wait of his life. Or at least it felt like it. He sat in the uncomfortable hospital chairs, his knee bouncing rhythmically. He was surrounded by the team, it was clear him and Morgan were the most affected though. Morgan having been there when the bomb went off. He thought about everything. The time you shared together. All the days off that were sent together. The laughs that were shared. The tears that were shed. He thought of it all. He also thought about how he didn't tell you. Didn't admit his feelings for you. And no you might die thinking that no one loves you. It was bitter torture, watching the doctors walk in and out of the waiting room, none of them for you. Until finally, a young male doctor approached the team. “uh, Mr Hotchner?” He asked towards him. His head shot up as he immediately walked over to the doctor. “Thats me” “Shes stable. But she did suffer extensive injuries, im aware the bomb was directly next to her?” He nodded. “Shes lucky she survived, but he did. There wont be much permanent damage. Although we don't know to what extent, we imagine she suffered massive hearing loss. We've assessed her and right now she cannot hear anything, she's completely deaf. We don't know if that will improve in the future” The young man informed Hotch. His stomach dropped. He couldn't believe he let this happen. It was all his fault. He let you go. He didn't even come with you to the scene. He could've stopped it. He completely derailed your life. You where 24. You had so much more that you could do. “You can visit her now, she's lucid so she should be fine” The team sprang up to go to your room. They carefully entered the room, hoping not to startle you, Although you already looked panicked. They assumed the doctor told you about your condition. Your head perked up when you saw your team coming through the door. Tears still streamed down your face as Hotch rushed over to you. “Hotch-Hotch, im deaf, im not- im not gonna be able to my job i-” You sobbed as he cradled your face into his hands. He knew you knew sign language but he didn't. He looked around as his teams sad faces. Prentiss looked at him. “I- I know sign language” Emily stepped forward next to your bed, and began explaining everything.

“I can do my job Hotch! Just because I cant hear any more doesn't mean im less able than anyone else out there” You snapped, gesturing to the room full of profilers. It had been a hard 6 months. You had recovered perfectly well, you hearing, not as much. You weren't aloud to do field work any more. You were constantly stuck doing paperwork, or in some stuffy police room. An ignorant comment from a police officer on your recent case had caused you to snap. “i know you can” He tried. Since the explosion, you had mastered lip reading, as well as gotten a hearing aid, as it was more convenient. “So why! Why has everyone been baby-ing me for the past months? Im so sick of everyone, even people I don't know, treating me like im unable to do the job Ive been working for my entire life! Im sick of it” You burst out, glad for the soundproof room. “No one is babying you” He returned. You scoffed and raised your eyebrows. “no ones been babying me? Okay. Dont act stupid Hotch. You see the way everyone acts around me. Constantly stepping on eggshells. I may of lost my hearing but I still have my profiling skills. Even you Big bad boss Hotchner has gone soft, something I never thought id see” “I haven't gone soft” He insisted. He had gone soft. Well he had always been soft for you, but now he showed it. “No? So whats all of it for? The driving me home, checking my place everyday, bringing me take out, making me dinner, bringing Jack around more often, Whats that for then?” You threw your arms around angrily. He was gonna say it. He couldn't stop it. “Its because I love you! I recognised you need help, now I finally have an excuse to do everything ive wanted to do for the last year.” He snapped back. He couldn't believe he had just said that. And by the look on your face, you couldn't believe it either. “What?” You whispered, heart race speeding up.

#aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner #hotch #hotch x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid x reader

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lantern-inthenight · 5 years ago

Note

How would each of the boys react to finding a pregnancy test like in the trash before you could actually tell them you were pregnant?

Since our boys are still p young, I’m gonna ask y’all to imagine that these take place in a Future!AU, where everyone is like,,,30 idk

Special thanks to @youmakeme-wonder for helping me brainstorm for these ❤️

Danny

You and Danny don’t necessarily plan to get pregnant

Sure, you want to have a kid, but the two of you figure it will just happen when it happens

You’re sitting in the living room, thumbing through a book

Danny is going through the house, emptying the bins bc tomorrow is trash day

There’s a loud crash in the bathroom, prompting you to look up

It sounded like Danny dropped everything he was carrying

You get up to go check on him, and find that that’s exactly what happened

“Babe, are you okay?”

You round the corner and see Danny standing there, surrounded by the trash he just dropped

He’s holding the pregnancy test you took a couple days ago, staring at you in shock

Oh shit.

“Babe, it’s okay,” you start to soothe him

But Danny laughs, actually laughs, and runs to you there in the doorway

His arms are around you in an instant, for the tightest hug you’ve ever gotten

“You’re pregnant?” He breathes, his voice almost a shout from how excited he is. You nod into his shouder

“Yeah,” you giggle

He picks you up, and you feel yourself spinning as the two of you laugh

“How long have you known?” He’s not critical; he genuinely wants to know

You start crying, and touch his face gently

“Only two days. But I have a doctor appointment next week.”

Danny’s eyes are welling up with tears, and he just hugs you again, because words couldn’t come close to how he’s feeling

When he sets you down, he immediately falls to his knees in front of you and kisses your stomach

“You’re gonna be an amazing mom,” he tells you, as you run your hand through his hair and cradle his face

“You too,” you quip, and the two of you laugh before hugging again

Jake

Jake usually greets you at the door when you bring home his favorite Chinese takeout, but he’s nowhere to be found when you walk in

“Jake? Honey, I’ve got dinner.”

You set the food on the kitchen counter, and look around

The TV is on, but Jake isn’t there. You check the backyard. No Jake there, either. Bedroom? Empty.

Lastly, you go into the bathroom to see if Jake is taking a shower where you could happily join him

But the thought leaves your head the moment you see Jake, sitting on the edge of the bathtub

His right hand is closed around the pregnancy test he’s holding

The screen is peeking out from his fingers, revealing the little pink + sign

Jake doesn’t react when you walk in

He’s just staring at the wall, completely motionless

“Jake?” You ask cautiously, inching nearer to him

You sit down next to him, rubbing his arm to soothe him

You had been trying for almost two years.

After a moment, Jake whispered

“When did you take this?”

“Yesterday,” you answer. “I have a doctor appointment tomorrow to confirm it. But I missed my period last month.”

“This is really happening,” Jake mutters, still staring at the wall

But after a moment, he just cracks

He looks at you, tears spilling down his cheeks

“We’re having a baby?”

You nod. “We’re having a baby, Jake.”

The look on his face is indescribable, and he just buries his face in your shoulder, weeping softly

You hold each other for a few minutes, crying tears of pure joy and relief

You eventually pull away, brushing his tears away with your thumbs as Jake’s hand falls to your belly

“I hope she likes Chinese food,” you joke, and the two of you burst into laughter

Josh

Josh finds out you’re pregnant the night you come home from your first OB appointment

But he didn’t exactly find out the way you wanted him to

He was digging through the bathroom drawer for a pair of nail clippers, complaining loudly when he couldn’t find them

“Just grab mine out of my purse! It’s in the kitchen,” you yell from the couch

But you freeze stiff where you’re sitting

Because your purse is currently full of prenatal vitamins and pamphlets about what not to eat when you’re with child

And you just told your unsuspecting husband to open the very same purse to get nail clippers

You stand up quickly, but it’s too late

Josh is standing at the kitchen counter, holding a bottle of pregnancy vitamins, looking like a curly-haired deer in the headlights

“Babe, this is a bottle of prenatal vitamins,” he says to you, apparently not absorbing the information in front of him

“Yes...” you answer, a few feet away, waiting for it to hit him

Josh laughs. “But these are for pregnant people.”

You raise your eyebrows at him

Josh gasps, looking from the pill bottle to you, and back again

There it is, you think

“You’re pregnant,” he breathes. You nod. Josh takes a deep breath, and you brace yourself for the noise

Josh just starts making guttural shrieks, gesturing at you and flailing his arms while he runs to you

Seriously, he can’t stop hollering

You know he can’t help himself, though, and you just nod and laugh along

Josh is beyond joyful, and actually manages to hyperventilate between screaming excitedly and kissing your face

So much so that he quite literally passes out in the living room

Well, you think, putting a pillow underneath his head, At least the living room is carpeted

Sam

Your arms are overflowing when you come through the door

“Hey babe, let me help you with those!” Sam bounds up to you, grinning widely, but you push past him in a manner that is nothing short of shady

Sam frowns, but shrugs it off

Little does he know that you went to the bookstore for a reason: research

You set the books down on your desk, making sure to cover up What to Expect When You’re Expecting with other books and clutter

You and Sam settle in for a nice night of watching movies on the couch

It’s quiet and peaceful, until Sam gets up to pee

On his way back from the bathroom, he bumps into your desk

The carefully arranged pile of books comes crashing down, sending your things everywhere

You frown, and sit up on the couch

“Babe, is everything okay?” You call out

“Yeah, it’s fine! I just knocked over some of your new books--”

Your eyes widen

“--but it’s okay, I can just put them b-- wait. What?” He mutters that last part to himself, and you close your eyes

You hear Sam shuffle back into the living room, and you open your eyes to look at him

He’s holding the very book you didn’t want him to see, his mouth agape

You give him a scared smile, your heart pounding

“...Surprise?” you guess.

“You--you’re--we’re,” Sam can’t find the words. You can only nod, chuckling to yourself

Sam sprints across the room and drops to his knees in front of you

He presses kiss after kiss to your tummy, and you notice his eyes shining in the dim light

“You’re really--?”

“Pregnant, yeah,” you finish for him

Sam laughs, a musical and beautiful sound

He has questions, so many questions, but you answer them all as best you can. At one point he frowns

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was gonna do a grand reveal,” you reply, embarrassed. “You weren’t supposed to find out like this.”

“That’s okay,” Sam answers, hugging your middle, “I don’t want it any other way.”

Tag List: @mr-stank-i-dont-feel-so-dank, @jeordinevankiszka, @that-glassbottomed-ego, @kissthesun-fightthefire, @lover--leaver, @myownparadise96, @satans-helper, @songbirdkisses, @bluewillowmom

#gvf #Greta Van Fleet #hcs #writing #blurbs #danny wagner #sam kiszka #josh kiszka #jake kiszka

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whydontwedanielcv-blog · 6 years ago

Text

Imagine

▪Eben Franckewitz

Y/n = Your name

{Summary: Eben cheats and you find out}

"Y/n, babe, you need to get over him". My best friend tells me, while I'm sitting on her couch surrounded by snacks accompanied by tub of ice cream in my lap.

"I loved him. I still do. I don't think i can even look at him the same anymore. Today was meant to be special. But its not." I say, flying the spoon for my ice cream through the air as my hands move to my voice and tears threaten to spill out of my eyes.

Now you maybe wondering why I'm such a mess at the moment. Take a seat and let me tell you exactly what happened. It started four days ago..

*Flashback to four days ago*

"Okay so I'll go shopping tomorrow and get everything. Thank you so much. Bye." I end the call and begin writing a list on my phone.

In four days Eben and i will be celebrating one year of being together. Not going to lie, having him beside me for the past year has been a dream come true.

I press play on Spotify again and start to dance around my lounge room, just soaking up all the good vibes I'm getting from the good mood I'm in. After a few of my favorite songs, a song starts to play that i dont want to listen to so i pause the song and start to scroll through Spotify, looking for another song. I hear a knock on the door and i put my phone down and open the door to see Zach Herron, Eben's best friend, standing there.

"Hey Y/n. I need to show you something". He says and i let him inside.

"You might want to sit for this." He says and i give him a confused look and take a seat on my couch.

He hands me his phone and there is a video on the screen. I press play and in the video its Eben in the studio talking to his producer. Everything seems okay until all of a sudden they kiss and my eyes well up with tears.

"Is.. is that really him?" I ask Zach as he moves the phone away.

He just nods and i let a tear slip down my cheek. I open my mouth to ask more questions but my door bursts open, stopping me. I look over and see Eben standing there with a sympathetic look on his face.

"Zach! I told you to stay out of it!" He yells walking closer to us.

"No Eben. This is your fault. If you didn't do it he wouldn't have anything to stay out of. Why didn't you tell me?" I ask, standing up off the couch whilst trying to hold back tears.

"Believe me, i was going to. I just didn't know how. The past two days have been so stressful just thinking about how to tell you without you hating me. And i realised that its impossible." Eben says, grabbing my hand.

I pull my hand away and say angrily, "this happened two days ago! What the hell Eben! You left me here to think that you love me but no. Instead your at work kissing your producer! I cant believe you left it this long without telling me. You had to wait until Zach did before you even bring it up to me."

I turn and start to walk away and he chases me and grabs my hand, stopping me.

"Y/n please. I love you and i didn't want your heart to break". He says, practically begging me for my forgiveness.

"No Eben. If you love me, her lips wouldn't have gone anywhere near yours. And you would have told me straight away. I was just stupid enough to believe that you still loved me. Just go Eben". I say, tears falling down my face as i pull my hand out of his grip, again.

His face drops and I see tears starting to form in his eyes.

"No im not leaving. Im not leaving you here upset knowing its my fault." He says.

"Either you leave or i do. I dont want to see you. We're done." I say, the last two words breaking my heart even more and i could tell it broke his too due to the change of his face.

He just looks just looks down and doesn't say anything. He wipes a tear of his cheek before walking out the door, no words or sounds coming from anyone.

*back to present*

I stuff another spoonful of ice cream inside my mouth as another episode of Brooklyn Nine Nine plays on Netflix. My attention shifts from the tv to my phone as it lights up beside me. I pick it and look at the screen to see a notification from Instagram saying that Eben has just started a live stream. I roll my eyes and lock my phone before turning back and continuing to watch Netflix and stuffing my face.

Just as the end credits for the episode start to appear on the screen, my phone starts lighting up with notification after notification.

Confused and curious, i grab my phone, unlocking it and going onto Instgram to see me being tagged in videos and my DM's blowing up. I open up a DM from a fan its a video of Eben. I roll my eyes and open several more only to find out that they are the same video.

I finally decide to give in and i press on a video and begin to watch it. Its a screen recording of Eben's livestream.

He's sitting there, red puffed eyes and tear stains on his cheeks, his guitar resting in his lap.

"I'd like to dedicate this song to.. well you know who you are. And if your watching this.. no your mostly not. Here goes nothing." He says as he starts to strum his guitar.

I recognize the tune immediately. He starts to sing When Did You Know from his newest EP.

He finishes the song and looks into the camera. "I'm sorry. No thats not the correct words to say. Theres nothing i can say or do to apologize. But i miss you and i want you back. I love you." He says and a tear rolls down his cheek and the video ends.

Little did i know, i also had tears down my face and i knew there was only one thing to do. I throw the blanket off me and i grab my phone and keys and run out to my car. I drive to Eben's house and i knock on the door and he opens it, looking shocked to see me.

"What made you think that i would accept your apology and want you back?" I say, leaving him no chance to have the first word. He opens his mouth to say to something and i jump in before he answers my question. "Because you were right. I want you back too." I pull him into a hug and smile. He hugs back and after a few seconds he pulls away and kisses me.

"I love you Y/n".

"I love you too Eben."

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seokluv · 8 years ago

Text

Their Reactions to Finding Out You’re Disabled~

Anon asked; Hi, if you dont want to do this request that's fine but, I've been trying to find someone to write this. I am disabled and in and out of a wheelchair. I was wondering if you could write BTS finding out their S/O is disabled. Like most of the relationship was Skype dates up to that point kind of thing. I understand if you don't want to do this request though. Love your blog btw 💙

ohmygosh. i had a couple other requests to do before i got this one, but once i saw it, I KNEW i had to do it. this is gonna make me cry omg ;w; next time you request something, could you come off anon? i’d like to be your friend ^o^ or you can message me on tumblr, i think ^.^ i don’t know what it’s like to be disabled, but i imagine it’s really hard sometimes (or all the time) i’d also like to know who your bias is so i can write a short fic with you (or the reader in general) and that member! <3 stay strong, friend <:

okay~ let’s do this request!

Kim Namjoon

Today was the day you were going to tell him. So many Skype calls, and he never noticed that you were in and out of a wheelchair. You didn’t want to tell him, but he had to know. You booted up the Skype program, anxiety clawing at you. You didn’t know what he was going to say, or how he was going to react, even. You hoped he had a positive reaction...

You typed to Namjoon, asking him if he wanted to Skype. He immediately responded with a yes. It was off to a good start. You clicked the blue call button, letting it ring. Eventually, Namjoon picked up, and you both could see each other. You smiled at him, and he smiled back. “How are you Jagi?” he asked, and you rubbed your forearm. “I’m okay, I guess. Look, I really have to tell you something.” you replied, and Namjoon arched a brow. “What is it, (Y/N)? You can tell me anything!” he beamed, and you just couldn’t help but burst into tears.

“Joonie... I’ve been hiding this from you for a long time, but. I’m disabled.” your voice echoed throughout your empty apartment. The anxiety had only gotten worse the second those words left your lips. “Jagi. Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” you could see tears pricking at his eyes, and you felt so bad. “I didn’t want you to... to...” you mumbled, at a complete loss for words. “Jagi. I love you no matter what. This means I have even more of a reason to take care of you!” he squeaked, and hearing that made you smile. “Thank you Namjoon. I love you so much.” you wiped away your tears, sniffling some. You spent the rest of the evening talking to Namjoon, and a week later, you finally got to hang out in person for what felt like the longest time.

Kim Seok-jin

You had set up another Skype date with Jin, but this time, it was an important one. You had to tell him something that you were keeping from him for a really long time. You weren’t worried of what he thought after, because you knew he’d always love you, always support you, and always care for you, no matter what. So you weren’t anxious in the slightest. Well... Maybe just a little. This was something he should have known by now, and what if he got irritated by it? Keeping something this important from him for so long?

When he accepted the call, you were silent for a while. Words couldn’t come to your mind, and you didn’t want to tell him. But it was a little too late for that, since you had already told him you had to tell him something gravely important. “Jagi?” that soothing tone instantly eased your worries, and you cleared your throat before you spoke up. “Okay.. Jin. I’ve been keeping this from you for a while. But... I-I’m disabled.” you frowned, looking at the camera, waiting for his reaction. “(Y/N). Why did you hide this from me?” he questioned softly, and you shrugged. “I don’t know. At first I was worried of what you would think of me after I told you.. I’ve been meaning to tell you, but... I needed time. I needed to know when it was the time to tell you. I’m sorry.” you croaked, a tear trailing down your cheek. “Oh.. Jagiya.. Don’t cry, I still love you all the same. I’ll take care of you for the rest of my life. I love you.” his words calmed you down, lulled you to a serene state of mind. He blew you a kiss through the screen and you smiled. You loved him so much, and you knew it would never change.

Min Yoongi

The day you dreaded for so long finally came. The day you decided to tell Yoongi your little secret. You had never told him about how you were disabled, since you always feared what he would think after you told him. You had decided to meet him in person, since you felt like it would mean more to him if you told him face-to-face. You were patiently waiting for Yoongi to come over, when you heard someone ring the doorbell. You wheeled over to the door with your wheelchair, and opened the door.

“Hi Jagiya! How’s my babygirl?” Yoongi asked as he let himself inside. He didn’t even notice the wheelchair... Maybe he had already known. You closed the door and wheeled over to the couch, where Yoongi sat down. “So, you wanted to talk to me?” Yoongi smiled with an accepting expression painted on his face. “Y-Yeah, Yoongi. I did.” you murmured, and he lifted your chin up with his index finger. “What about?” he looked worried now, due to your unenthusiastic tone. “Well... Yoongi, I’m... disabled. As you can tell by the wheelchair.” and Yoongi started laughing.

“Jagi. I’ve known this for a long time.” he smiled sincerely, rubbing your cheek with his thumb. “Oh. But I thought... that you didn’t know. I never told you.” you sputtered, unable to think of a reason how he would know about this. “Oh. Yeah, I could tell by the wheelchair and the trouble you had getting up sometimes when we Skyped.” Yoongi explained. A warm smile washed upon your lips, as Yoongi got down to your level to kiss you. “I love you, (Y/N).”

Park Jimin

Many months had passed since you first started dating Jimin. You never thought about telling him you were disabled, you figured he just knew anyways. But, he most likely didn’t know, and you had never told him. Most of your dates were Skype calls, and wouldn’t be able to tell if you had a disability or not. Today was the day though. The day that you’d tell him. You were a little anxious, but not all that worried.

The second he answered the call you told him. You didn’t hold a single thing back, and you didn’t regret anything either. The look on his face was priceless. He was totally shocked, but he wasn’t mad at all. “J-Jagi! Why didn’t you tell me?” he gasped, and you laughed, shaking your head. “I don’t know... I just thought you would know by now, you know? But I guess not. The look on your face was hilarious!” and Jimin rolled his eyes. “It wasn’t that funny. Now how are you going to walk down the aisle when we get married? This is serious, Jagi!” you blushed furiously. Marriage? He was already thinking about that? “Jimin, I go in and out of a wheelchair. Sometimes I can walk. I should be able to walk down the aisle, hopefully.” you giggled, and Jimin smiled brightly.

“I made you laugh~ but seriously, why were you so worried about telling me?” Jimin asked, “Well... I don’t know, really. But I know that you accept me for who I am. I love you, Jiminie.” “I love you too, (Y/N).”

Jung Hoseok

You knew Hoseok would understand when you told him you were disabled, even after keeping it from him for so long. Hoseok was just cool like that. He always understood you and accepted you for who you were. You had zero worries about telling him. The second you booted up the Skype call, you had spilled the beans to him.

“Hoseok... I’ve been meaning to tell you this for a while, but. I was too scared to tell you at first. I’m... disabled.” you mumbled, and Hobi’s eyes lit up like Christmas lights. “Really?” and you nodded. You were expecting a different reaction from him, to be honest. You thought he would have cried when you told him. “Jagi-- I... Thank you for telling me!” he croaked, before bursting into tears. Welp. That’s what you were waiting for. “Hobi, baby- it’s okay!” you reassured him, but the tears just kept coming. “It means a lot to me, telling me these things... It means you trust me, a lot! Jagiya, that just makes me so happy.” he wiped his tears away, sniffling some.

“Jagiya. I want you to remember that I will always love you, no matter what happens to you, no matter who you are... God. I just love you so much. Thank you so much for telling me.” he laughs it off, which makes you smile. “I love you too, Hobi. I was always worried about what you were going to say, but... I guess there was nothing to be scared of!” “Now what do we do? How am I going to take care of you while I’m away from you for so long?” “We’ll figure something out, Hobi.”

Jeon Jeongguk

You had been stressing out for a long time. You’ve been wanting to tell Jungkook about your disability for a while, but you never had the courage to do so. But the day has finally arrived, the day that you told him. You had took him out on a date in person, so it meant more when you told him. It just felt weird doing it on Skype. So you took him out on a nice lovely date to the park, and you tried your best without your wheelchair. But eventually, you needed it.

“Jagiya?! What’s wrong?” Jungkook asked, worry painted on his face. You had collapsed, you were pushing yourself too hard today. You needed your wheelchair. “Kookie... I think now’s a good time to tell you.. I’m disabled. I’m in and out of a wheelchair. I was pushing myself over the limit, and... I kinda need my wheelchair right now.” you panted, as you were on your hands in knees in the green grass. “Jagiya! Why didn’t you bring your wheelchair? I don’t even care about the fact that you hid this from me for so long- I care about why you aren’t taking care of yourself...” Jungkook sighed, scooping you up in his arms and walking towards the direction of your house.

“I’m sorry Jungkook. I thought.. that I’d be okay without it, just for one day.” “Oh Jagiya... You don’t have to apologize. I know you wanted to act like you were a normal person around me, but... if you needed your wheelchair, you should have just brought it. You didn’t have to do this for me...” he felt guilty as all hell, and you could tell by the expression on his face. “I’m really sorry. I...” you began, but Jungkook shut you up by pressing his lips against your’s. “Shush.”

Kim Taehyung

It didn’t take Taehyung long to know that you had something on your mind. You were in the middle of yet another Skype call when he had finally asked what was up. You were anxious about telling him, but it was better telling him now, then never. You had mustered up the courage to tell him after a couple of minutes of silence.

“Taehyung... I’m disabled.” you told him, and his eyes widened. He was shocked, to say the least, and didn’t know what to say at all. He was at a complete loss for words. Finally, he spoke up, “Jagiya. I can’t believe it... How could you keep this from me for so long? I mean, of course I knew something was up eventually, but... still.” he murmured, and you sighed. “I’m really sorry Taehyung. I did want to tell you as soon as possible, but I just couldn’t. I was scared of what you were going to think of me.” “Jagi. You don’t have to worry about anything, okay? I’m always going to be here for you. Always going to love you, support you... I love you more than you will ever know. I’ll always take care of you. I’ll always protect you. I would do anything for you.” Taehyung said, and tears pricked at your eyes. “T-Thank you, Tae-Tae. Hearing that makes me so happy. I love you, Taehyung.” you whispered.

“I love you too, Jagiya. Forever and always.” he replied, smiling warmly at you through the screen. The rest of the night you guys Skyped together, making jokes and talking about what’s been happening to the both of you and such.

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multimatchupmadness · 7 years ago

Note

#20 for the angst prompt??? iwaoi if you could :P

hahahaha you just wanna see the world burn don’t you

“For once stop pretending that you’re okay! Just talk to me!”

Oikawa looked at the score on the screen, 23 - 25. The arena was losing their minds, screaming their cheers, but Oikawa’s hearing was tunneled, like there were mufflers over his ears inhibiting his sense of hearing. His team was devastated, some on the ground crying, others consoling each other. He just stood there, staring at the scoreboard. Suddenly, his attention was brought back to reality, a deep voice resounding in his ears.

“Oikawa-san, thank you for a good final game.”

Oikawa blinked up at the person talking to him, trying to make sense of his words.

“Oikawa-san?”

Oikawa smiled, but it wasn’t friendly. It was bitter and sad, “No, thank you Ushiwaka. For taking away every possible opportunity for me to go to nationals, both in high school and college.”

He turned on his heel and walked away without bothering to hear his response, because it was the truth. It’s been nine years he’s been playing against Ushijima. He couldn’t beat him in middle school, or high school. And it followed him to university, too. Oikawa just wasn’t destined to see Nationals it seemed.

He went through the regular routine of thanking the fans, and the opposing team, and leaving the gym promptly. His team looked at him anxiously as they awaited a final speech, telling them how good next year will be and it’ll all be okay. And that’s what he did. Because Oikawa is a good captain and won’t let his feelings get in the way of anything, especially not his team that looked up to him.

“So thank you, for a great four years, for my fellow seniors, and for being great kouhai’s to the rest of you. You truly made my college experience a great one.” Oikawa finished with a deep bow to the rest of the team, and that much was true. He had nothing but respect for his team because they worked so hard, it was his fault they didn’t go to nationals, not theirs.

They all went their separate ways, Oikawa declining dinner politely, for he already had plans.

He made his way out of the arena, to be greeted with someone waiting for him.

“Hey, baby, how you holding up?” A familiar voice asked him.

Oikawa looked at him, a sympathetic look on his face, making him feel even more pathetic than he did. But he wasn’t about to let him know that.

“I’m fine, Iwa-chan. It’s just volleyball, it’s not a big deal. I’m going to the Japan team soon anyway, no biggie.” Oikawa said lightly, shrugging. Not meaning a single word.

“Bullshit.” Iwaizumi immediately replied.

Oikawa recoiled a bit, “No, it’s not. I’m fine, look at me!” Oikawa said, plastering his best smile on his face and holding his arms out proudly, just to show how okay he was.

“Why are you lying to me?” Iwaizumi asked, sounding angry.

“I’m not.” Oikawa said, getting angry in return. Sure, he was lying, but Iwaizumi didn’t need to start yelling at him, “I’m fine, I’ve always been fine. I’m used to this, can we just go get something to eat?”

Oikawa brushed past him to walk to his car, hoping he would just drop it and they could eat.

Suddenly, there was a strong grip on his bicep stopping him from moving.

“Iwa-chan, don’t tease me, you know I like it rough.” Oikawa said lightly, the playfulness not fully reaching his tone.

Suddenly the grip tightened and forced Oikawa to spin around and face him, and he was furious, “Jesus fucking christ, Tooru! For once stop pretending that you’re okay! Just talk to me!”

Oikawa’s eyes widened slightly before he ripped his arm away, “Hajime, I told you I’m fine, just fucking drop it already!”

“No, I won’t! You’re not fine. I can see it in your eyes and I hear it in the tone of your voice. I thought were were past this! You’re acting like your shitty high school self again. I know you’re upset over losing to Ushiwaka again.”

Oikawa bristled and turned away, not saying anything, because he was right, he was being shitty to Iwaizumi and he didn’t deserve it, he was just trying to care for him.

He felt hands on either side of his face, gentle compared to how he was treated just seconds before. He let his head be turned to face Iwaizumi, his face completely devoid of all anger, just worry, “Tooru, please, talk to me. I don’t want you to keep your hurt inside of you. We’re past that, please.”

Oikawa’s eyes stung with the warning of incoming tears at the softness of Iwaizumi’s tone, one reserved purely for Oikawa.

“Hajime…” Oikawa replied, voice wavering, all emotions he was trying to shove down bubbling up.

“C’mere.” Iwaizumi said, pulling him close and hugging him tightly, rubbing circles into the small of his back, causing all his emotions to burst forward, and that’s when he lost it.

He sobbed into Iwaizumi’s shoulder, holding him as close as possible, and the words started pouring out, “Hajime, I wasn’t good enough. I’ve never been good enough. I haven’t been able to beat him this whole time. I didn’t get my team to nationals. They worked so hard, Hajime, they deserved it.” He sobbed, the last sentence coming out a whisper, “I deserved it.”

Iwaizumi didn’t say anything while Oikawa let it all out, just continued to hold him and comfort him. After what seemed like forever, Oikawa started to calm down, and Hajime pulled him away, but still held him, one hand on his shoulder, the other wiping his tears.

“Now you know none of that is true. What did we always say? ‘The six who are stronger will win.’ That’s just what happened. You’re more than good. You’re going to the Japan team. Tooru, you’re amazing, you’re wonderful, you’re beautiful, and you’re perfect. Yeah, the team deserved it and I sure as hell believe you deserved it, but it’s okay. You’ll go to the olympics and completely forget about these silly tournaments, okay?”

Oikawa stared at him, fresh tears flowing down his cheeks and he just nodded.

“I love you, Tooru.”

“I love you too, Hajime. Thank you.”

~~~~

That turned out more sappy and less angsty IM SORRY I CANT HELP IT also that was painful never imagine oikawa not going to nationals ever please dont it hurts dont read this just pretend it didnt happen ok thanks

Ask me for an angst prompt!

~ Mod Usagi

#this wasn't fun #it was #but it wasnt #answered #anon #drabble #oikawa tooru #haikyuu #haikyu #hq #haikyuu!!#haikyu!!#hq!!

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melchixr · 8 years ago

Text

Favourite Faded Fantasy

Anon said: sad modern hernst???? i dont have any ideas or anything but that would be cool

So I took that and I fucking ran with it. way too far. this is really heckin long so i put it up on my Ao3 and split it into chapters HERE. so yeah

Song: Favourite Faded Fantasy by Damien Rice

Words: 3951

Warnings: Suicide, Abuse, NSFW mention, alcohol use.

You could be my favourite taste To touch my tongue I know someone who could serve me love But it wouldn’t fill me up

“One more,” Hanschen begged, grabbing Ernst before he could open the car door. They had been sitting for half an hour in the parked car down the block from Ernst's house. And Ernst had been trying to get out for almost ten of those minutes. “Just one more before you go.”

“Hanschen you said one more five kisses ago,” Ernst scoffed back. His hair was a mess of waves from the last hour of pulling and fingers running through it. “I really really need to get back to the house before my dad wakes up and sees that I’m gone.”

The blond sat back in his seat, nodding to himself. “Okay. Just promise me that one of these days you’ll spend all night with me.”

“You know I can’t risk that. My dad would notice eventually.”

Hanschen sighed, knowing that it was always just be one of those things Hanschen wanted but couldn’t get. But he wouldn’t let it get him down for too long. If he did that then he’d just be depressed the entire relationship. “Well. Then just promise me one more kiss then?”

Ernst leaned across the center console, locking lips with Hanschen one more time before opening the car door. “I’ll see you at school tomorrow, right?” He whispered, lips still touching Hanschen’s.

“See you then, handsome,” Hanschen replied as Ernst, closed the door and hustled down the street. He watched Ernst

You could have my favourite face And favourite name I know someone who could play the part But it wouldn’t be the same

“Ernst!”

Both Ernst and Hanschen’s head bolted up to look at Madame Cerceau, standing before the class in her cardigan and khakis. “Yes, Madame?” Ernst muttered, his hands still working on tearing apart a little scrap of paper. He was across the room, but Hanschen could still tell he was flushed pink.

“Can you please translate the phrase on the board?”

Ernst nodded shakily, continuing with a nervous voice. “Une maison n'est pas…”

“I saw that, Hansi,” Melchior was leaning over to whisper in Hanschen’s ears. “I saw you practically bounce out of your seat when she called on Ernst.”

��I have no idea what you’re talking about,” the blond muttered under his breath, eyes glued to the board and tried his best to look at neither him nor Ernst, struggling across the room.

“Uh huh….sure thing, Hans….” Melchior scoffed and went back to scribbling notes. “You know...You could just tell me if you have a crush on Ernst. Everyone does.”

A blush raised to Hanschen’s cheeks before he shook his head like a maniac. “Oh no. Absolutely no. I couldn’t. I’d never.”

“Ernst!” Madame Cerceau scoffed, grabbing Hanschen’s attention one more time. As if she had just discovered the fountain of youth. Hanschen looked up with eyes lit up and gaze searching for the owner of the name. “Please try that once more with a soft U.”

As the gentle boy continued to recite the sentence, Melchior snickered from behind them. “Oh. Yeah. Sure, Hansi. No crush at all.”

“Yeah. It’s not a crush. Trust me.”

No it wouldn’t be the same No it wouldn’t be the same No it wouldn’t be the same As with you

“You okay?” Hanschen asked, the first to break the silence between them. His throat felt raw even though he hadn’t spoken in an hour. He looked over to Ernst, tugging on a hoodie to a college he never even wanted to go to.

“Yeah,” the brunette said, still trying to catch his breath and come down from his high. “I’m fine. You?”

Hanschen looked around the dark, dingy basement he had snuck Ernst into. Now that the two were apart, it felt freezing in the small room. With exposed walls and tile floor, the only things in the underground room where an old couch, an ugly space heater, and a boombox from before they were born quietly playing a Pink Floyd album that was already in there. “Yeah. I’m doing pretty good...How you feeling?”

“I feel….different,” His big green eyes finally looked over to Hanschen, who still wasn’t wearing any pants. Just a pair of kinda gross briefs and tee shirt that obviously read : ‘I was expecting this tonight’. But Ernst was still looking at him with such awe and affection that Hanschen hadn’t seen before. There was something different now. Something delicate and beautiful in Ernst’s face.

“Bad different or….”

“No, no, no,” He assured, a hand moving to Hanschen’s arm. The touch was gentle unlike all that had just unfolded. Hanschen felt the warmth flooding from Ernst’s body to his. It sent a little shiver down his back, the lack of touch really sending him for a tizzy. “It’s a good different. A really really great different.”

The blond giggled, curling up to his boyfriend’s side and taking in all the body heat. He laid his head on Ernst’s lap, immediately demanding that Ernst relax and lay back on the awkwardly sweaty couch. “Before I take you home, just say here for a minute?”

Ernst smiled in reply, laying back and moving to stroke Hanschen’s already messy hair.

You could be my favourite place I’ve ever been I got lost in your willingness To dream within the dream

“And we’ll paint the walls green, not like moss green. Like, an olive green,” Hanschen’s eyes trained on the twenty-five cent bouncy ball he had found in his desk drawer and was now tossing up and down. “And it might look a little ugly but I swear when we put all your art on the walls it’ll look cute.”

Ernst scoffed, rolling over to look at Hanschen, who was still laying on his back in the grass right next to him. “I’m trying to read right now, babe. Why are you still going on about this?”

“Because I’m thinking about our apartment when we move in together,” He looked over at his other half with a goofy grin. “We gotta plan it sooner or later. Now, how do you feel about painting our bedroom light blue?”

“What makes you think we’ll have money for this? I’m gonna major in art I don’t think we’ll be exactly swimming in cash.”

Hanschen set the ball aside now and propped himself up on his elbows. “I’ll tell my dad we’re roommates and have him send me checks because he’ll miss his only son.”

“You’ll milk your dad for all he’s got,” Ernst scoffed and went back to his copy of The Tempest. “Whatever you say, baby.”

“Well what would you prefer?” Hanschen sat up and scooted ever closer to Ernst, leaning over to absent-mindedly touch his thigh. “As soon as I graduate I’ll get him to get me a job too and I’ll work with him until I can get an even better one and you’ll never have to worry about money once.”

The pretty brunette rolled his eyes, going back to reading once more as he continued. “You’ve got big dreams for the future, Hansi.”

When he looked up he saw Hanschen lowering himself onto Ernst, crashing down to lay on top of him and grab all the attention he craved. “And you don’t?”

You could be my favourite faded fantasy I’ve hung my happiness upon what it all could be

“It’s not a big deal, Ernie, just take it,” Hanschen pushed the plastic CD case back into Ernst’s hands. “I made it for you so I want you to have it.”

Ernst looked around the half empty library, nervousness exuding from his being. “I just don’t want anyone to notice it.”

“It’s just a mix CD, Ernst. No one’s gonna notice!”

As Hanschen’s laugh ran though the room, Ernst looked down at the CD. The cover was simple. Just a blank piece of paper with ‘ERNST MIX’ on it in sharpie. It was when he popped it open and looked at the inside when he was shocked.

“Hanschen, babe, is this a poem?”

The high school senior turned a light shade of pink. “Don’t read that. It’s embarrassing!”

Nonetheless, He began to recite. “‘To Ernst, my rock and my heart, holding all I have in his hands. Green eyes and gentle touch. An angel with voice of-’”

“STOP!” Hanschen whined, hiding his face in his hand. “I’m literally so embarrassed. “

“Don’t be, babe. It’s adorable.” he giggled and tucked the CD into his bag. “And it’s our little secret.”

And what it all could be What it all, what it all could be What it all, what it all could be With you

The loud, blaring ringtone at midnight woke up Hanschen. He was shaken at first, unsure as to what was even going on. Then he remembered that his ringtone for Ernst was Bananarama’s Love in the First Degree, which he had set for himself.

“Hello? Ernst?” he muttered into the phone. “What’s going on?”

Immediately, Hanschen could tell something was wrong. He heard the stuttered, shaky breath of sobs coming from Ernst’s side of the call. His voice came out raw and weak. “H-Hans….H-He found it.”

“What?” Ernst? Calm down!” He was suddenly wide awake and full of fear. “What’s wrong, Ernie?”

“M-My dad! He f-f-found the CD yo-yo-you made me.”

Hanschen felt his heart stop for a second.

His head burst into a thudding headache as he spoke in terrified streams of thought. “What? How? Did he read it? Why are you crying? Are you okay? Ernst what happened?”

“He found the f-f-fucking CD and a-asked who it as f-from and when I-I-I-I….Fuck…..” He took a deep, shaky breath before continuing. “I didn’t tell him he-e-e hit me and-”

“He hit you?!” Hanschen practically yelled before becoming aware of his sisters asleep in the rooms either side of him.

Ernst broke down on the other side, sobbing into the phone mic. His noises soon became muffled, as if he had buried his face in a pillow.

“Oh fuck. It’s gonna be okay, Ernst. I promise. We’re gonna be just okay.”

You could hold the secrets that save Me from myself I could love you more than love could All the way from hell

Seeing Ernst in the halls hurt Hanschen more that he would ever imagine. It was already hard enough to see Ernst before and only be able to hang out with him in a group. They’d sit on opposite sides from each other and never cast more than a passing glance and never dare touch.

Now, there was nothing. He’d see Ernst walking from class to class, his gaze cast on the ground. His right eye was bruised and black, while the other looked sullen with dark bags underneath it.

He hadn’t been sleeping. He hadn’t been texting or calling Hanschen. And he hadn’t been sleeping.

Finally, it had gotten to the point where he couldn’t take it anymore. If he had to see Ernst in class or in the cafeteria or anywhere and not run up to kiss him, he’d go crazy.

He found his chance in third period, as the bell rang and the entire French class began to pack up to leave. He decided to forgo his backpack or talking to melchior and ran up to Ernst.

Ernst was in a red sweater about three sizes to large and he was nearly swimming in scratchy fabric. He looked and acted like he wanted to disappear.

“Ernst, babe,” He whispered as soon as he got close enough. The classroom was emptying fast so he had to be quick. “I don’t know why you haven’t been speaking to me but I’m really afraid and I just wanna tell you that I love you and-”

“I’m fine.” Ernst bit back with such bitterness Hanschen had never encountered before. “Don’t speak to me.”

Hanschen was shocked at first. But he didn’t have the time or energy to be put off. He just continued, even as Ernst refused to look him in the eye. “What’s going on Ernst? Why haven’t you responded to my texts? Why haven’t you spoken to me?”

“Because no one else can find out about…...Us.”

“No one will, Ernst, I promise-”

“Someone already found out, Hanschen!” The frail boy hissed. His voice sounded broken, almost hopeless. “He found out and now he has my phone and he’s not letting me out of his sight and he’s sending me off to Goddamn military school.”

“What?! What hap-”

“You happened, Hanschen,” And with that, he took off out to the hall and out of Hanschen’s life.

You could be my poison, my cross, My razor blade I could love you more than life If I wasn’t so afraid

He was tired of this. Tired of being so scared. Tired of walking through the halls and seeing Ernst on the other side. Tired of never meeting eyes with the boy he had fallen in love with. Tired. Absolutely tired.

And he was tired of replaying the last time he saw Ernst in his head over and over. Last time he kissed Ernst. Last time he held Ernst.

And his biggest fear was that he’d lose those memories.

He found a pinch of solace in the vodka Melchior would bring to him in study hall. It always came in plastic water bottles that he would pay five dollars a piece for. He’d wait for Melchior to do all the work, slowly placing the bottle into Hanschen’s backpack and then pull the five dollar bill out of Hanschen’s wallet in the front pocket.

No words ever exchanged over it. No seconds glances.

And Hanschen would wait for the rest of the day, calmly carrying the bottle with him until he got home and tucked it into his sock drawer.

He knew he could depend on Melchior. He didn’t ask any questions. And he could also depend on chugging it all at midnight, scrolling through the old text conversations between him and Ernst, and staring out of his bedroom window into the now stormy sky.

He knew Ernst would be leaving after winter break.

He knew everything was about to fall apart.

He knew that this was the end.

And he had never been to afraid.

Of what it all could be What it all, what it all could be Of what it all, what it all could be With you

The art room was cold. So cold it turned Hanschen’s voice to mist and his fingernails purple. It was probably warmer outside, but he couldn’t be out there. That was in plain sight. If Ernst saw him camping out he’d turn and immediately take off like he always does.

So there he sat, almost all of lunch, looming next to the door and watching people walk to and from. None of them ever being Ernst.

Then he saw it, the flash of yellow. The sweater. And he saw it coming right past the door. All alone.

Without a moment of hesitation, his hand shot out. Grabbing Ernst by the back of his collar and yanking him into the abandoned and dark classroom.

“Holy hell!” Ernst shouted out of shock. As soon as the door was slammed shut behind him, Ernst span around to see Hanschen, pale and shaky, string up at him. His blue eyes that used to hold sparks of life were now a dull grey. He looked like he hadn’t slept in days. He looked just like Ernst. “Hansi-Hanschen...What do you want?”

The slightly older boy sighed, extending his hands in a gesture of surrender. “Hear me out, Ernst. I thought of something. I haven’t stopped thinking since this all happened. And I think I came up with something.”

Ernst finally relaxed, his shoulders dropping and his muscles stopped tensing. “What is it, Hans?”

“Listen….Ernst….Run away with me?”

There was a pause, shock making the room silent as Ernst stared down at what was now his ex. “What?”

“We’ll run away. I have a car and money and we’ll go out West until we can find work and we’ll work our asses off and-”

“No.”

Hanschen suddenly felt the cold again. After weeks of not speaking, he finally got the love of his life alone and talking. And what he got was a no.

“What do you mean ‘No’?” He stammered out. “Ernst, you’re all I have. And you’re about to be shipped away to military school! How can you say no?”

That’s when the tears began to build up in Hanschen’s eyes. Ernst didn’t say a word, just looked on with a sad, expression, He looked like he pitied both himself and Hanschen. “I can’t just up and run away. I need to finish school. I need to go to college. What about that grand future of yours that you talked about?”

“It’s not worth it if I have to do it without you, Ernst,” He attempted to explain to no avail. “Please. Just hear me out and-”

“No, Hanschen, and that’s final.”

Hanschen Rilow didn’t realize what it really felt like to hurt until then.

Loved is all that bloomed Always what you did Never let someone go or they... I ain't never loved like you

It would be pussy not to do it.

He already walked there in the snow. He already chucked his phone into a dumpster three blocks from his house.

Far too late to go back now.

He was afraid of pain above all. He’d already been through enough of it. For a few minutes, he worried that the river would be frozen over because of the cold weather. But when he got there and heard the sound of rushing water underneath him and knew that it was just like it had alway been.

He was still relieved that at least he wouldn’t hit ice. He actually read that the shock of entering freezing water is the most likely result in all of this.

Maybe he should wander home and wait until he was sober to do this.

Or maybe he should take on more look over the edge of the bridge.

Or maybe he should just hold his breath and take that step.

I’ve never loved I've never loved

Ernst didn’t think that his last day spent at home would be spent in a suit. Or in a graveyard.

His father had told him a million times on the car ride there that he wouldn’t speak, even though Mr. and Mrs. Rilow had asked him to. He nodded in silent compliance and just stared out the window until they had arrived

I’ve never loved loved loved like you

The casket was closed, as he had expected. Ernst didn’t really want to know what people who drowned in zero degree rapids. But still part of him found the intense need to open it and see Hanschen one last time. He wanted to take the moment to take him all in.

He was worried that he might forget what Hanschen looked like if he didn’t look at him knowing it was the last time.

But the top was sealed so all he could do was lay the white rose on top of the dark mahogany like everyone else.

The crowd was what you would expect. Most were all older people, probably friends of his parents. They all seemed well off, just like the Rilows.

The family was sitting in the front row, all well dressed and holding each other and crying their striking blue eyes out.

A fair amount of the funeral crowd were actually kids from school. All of them were from the group of friends they would always hang out with. All of them were close to Hanschen. His parents definitely knew their son and who he was.

Maybe that’s why they asked Ernst to speak.

I’ve never loved

“I wish I could find someone else in this world like Hanschen Rilow,” Melchior said, his voice clear and articulate. He stood at the podium, with his knuckles white from clutching the sides with such vigor. “And I wish, above anything else, to find Hanschen Rilow again. And to find him in the everyday things I do so he’ll never be quite gone.”

He stepped away, only to let himself break down and begin to cry when those watching began to clap. Thea rushed to his side, hugging him and cradling his face before leading him back to the seats.

Hanschen’s father walked to the podium, his eyes bloodshot but his chin still head high. He was a proud man. He always would be. Even when his only son’s name was on a slab of marble. “Thank you so so so much, Melchior….You were an amazing friend to Hanschen and a beautiful speaker….Thank you for honoring him….” he rubbed his temple and took a deep breath to continue. “Next, I would like to introduce our last speaker. Someone loved so strongly by my son and so treasured by him, Ernst Robel.”

Ernst realized he had to stop being so afraid in that moment.

And even as he felt his father grab his arm, he shook it off.

And even though he didn’t have anything written or prepared, he shook it off.

And even though he was shaking and sweating, he shook it off.

“Hi….I’m Ernst Robel and uh…..I was madly and deeply in love with the boy who’s going into the ground.” He stammered out, his eyes cast down to his twitching hands. “And I didn’t have any fancy speech prepared but I don’t think I have to. Because I….I fell in love with Hanschen Rilow without thought or preparation and that’s how I’ll do this too….”

I’ve never loved

“I met Hanschen freshman year. When I was lost and had no idea who I was. But Hanschen knew exactly who he was. And who I was too. And I’d like to say over these past three years, I slowly learned who I was because of Hanschen,” He looked up for the first time, practically vibrating with fear. He was met with a hundred eyes, staring up at him. Some were shocked. Some were teary. Some were full of joy. He saw Melchior standing in the back with a soft smile and a knowing look. This only encouraged him to keep talking.

“And well….uh…. I miss him more than anything because he was something I’d never had before. He was, to me at least, a shoulder to cry on. He was a beautiful goal for me to reach and the only thing that would make me smile at the end of the day. And he was….my everything,” He felt the words get caught in his throat. And for a moment, he almost thought he was about to break. Then he saw his father, sitting next to an empty chair with his face screwed into a glare. “And he’s what’s on my mind when I go to sleep and he’s the one who broke my heart. But he’s also the one who taught me how to love. And also so many other things I could never have enough time to go into. I have never loved like I love Hanschen Rilow.”

He paused. He almost expected to hear yells of outrage or shouts of encouragement. But instead he heard nothing. Just an the tombstones, the foggy sky, him, and the love of his life tucked into a casket beside him.

“I wish I took you up on that offer, Hanschen. I’ve never loved like you.”

I’ve never loved.

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