#i can either do close to canon like i like doing or full slay

[puhpandas]

I miss drawing cassie... if anyone has any little doodle reqs I might draw them

[punkeropercyjackson]

Black Gwen Stacy headcanons because duh ofc she is,just watch the movies

Half white afrolatina with George being her white parent and Helen(a)was her black parent

George is a huge racist who was antiblack towards his own daughter and Helena died when Gwen was so little that Gwen knew almost nothing about blackness or latino heritage and it gave her trauma that the other black Spiderpeople helped her heal from

Pretty obviously looks black/white mixed-As in,black features but light.She has black 4c hair,brown eyes,light brown skin and a nose and lips that're bigger than any full white person's but she's not as darkfeatured/strongfeatured as a monoracial black person either

Dominican specifically(she's literally from New York)

Miles instantly recognized her as afrolatina thanks to being afrolatino himself and that leads to extra bonding in Into as Miles teaches her bits from their culture.The basics obvs but also our memes,our shows and our fashion norms and that all gets hint dropped at in the Atsv with Gwen's outfits and jokes having black/latina twists to them(Example:Instead of a stripped shirt,she wore a hot pink tank top with a bedazzeld white heart on it)

This leads to Gwen finally truly feeling black and that's how she ended up forming The Mary Janes by befriending other black kids for the first,second time.It made her quitting the band all that harder and there's callbacks to them as she expresses missing them and she ends up coming back while staying Spiderwoman-She can do both

Into Gwen had straight hair,Across Gwen has locs(Implied hair journey)

Pastel Punk is her way of creating her black girlhood and she's also kidcore because she's audhd too

Margo and her were instant besties.Because Gwen immediately jumped to befriend the nearest black teen girl the second she saw her and Margo accepted her friendliness but also because as they hung out,Gwen realized Margo's got a bad home life too and comforted her about it so now they're ride 'i'm not letting you die' best friends and Gwen and Hobie were like 👀👀👀👀👀 at the lil flirting between her and Miles as background comedy and she used her webs to drag her along with them which Margo reacted to only with an eyeroll and saying she just had to ask(Margo also got her own intro thingy)

Gwen the second she met an older black woman:MOM🥺?!

No but 'Adopt me' is so sweet with black Gwen-In canon it's funny and cute but this adds layers to it.Jessica mentors her in being Spiderwoman AND in being a black girl and Gwen does her best to pay her back by trying to make her feel like more than just her caretaker and teacher but as a hero in her own right and someone she considers a friend.She frequently diy's her gifts and excitedly shows them to her and Jessica thanks her with smiles and physical affection and keeps all of them and eventually gifts her silver hoop earrings with pink pendants

Her behavior at the Morales household was because she's afrolatina but not raised in the culture and that's the joke with Jefferson and Rio being baffled at a black girl not knowing she was being rude with those things despite being great otherwise(Rio makes a lighthearted jab at her for being mixed.She has biracial girl slay AND biracial girl cringe /hj)

'Half of who i am' is a TRIPLE entendre-It's about her being Spiderwoman,a trans girl AND black biracial.She also cuts George out of her life as a lesson to mixed kids about how they don't have to love their racist white parents JUST BECAUSE they're their parents and she pretends to accept him again just to get him close enough to beat his ass and says 'You're not a good dad because good cops don't exist.You're just my canon event-So die instead of me' and leaves him heartbroken to go back to Jessica since she's accepted her as her daughter

She listens to Meet me @ the Altar,Selena,Teezo Touchdown,Flowerovlove and Megan Thee Stallion and does covers,has glossy lips as her daily makeup look,owns a name necklace,her favorite foods are galletas con suspiro and pechurina and flan and strawberry Nesquick,she dosen't use too much aave just yet cause she's still learning but as she grows she makes it her regular speech pattern,sadly has significant amount of hair damage from her childhood(thanks for nothing George /s),gets gender euphoria from black pastel and/or punk girl aesthetics,black mermaids and black women in horror

Because of the last part,her chosen middle name is Marina since it's sea themed

More Margo expansion:Her parents are a toxic couple who don't hate her,just eachother but they let that overpower their love for her by extensively exposing her to it due to intergenerational trauma.Margo didn't have an irl friends before the Spiderband and she was different from a lot of black kids too so she didn't have refuge in them either and that's why her and Gwen(+ Miles and Hobie)love eachother so much and she got Gwen into video games like how Gwen got her into legos and Gwen guided her into coping mechanisms for a bad home life and promised her she'd get out one day but in a safer way than she did.They also got matching grills at one point and are a matched set in general who have eachother twin on everything,do NOT seperate them /lh

Black Love Ghostpunk aka the only valid romantic Ghostpunk aka MY canon Ghostpunk.They met Bubbline style at one of Hobie's show's where Gwen thought he was super hot and made a weird ass dork of herself but Hobie's autistic ass found THAT super hot so he brought her up on stage to sing with him as a ref to that one concept art and she recognized him the next day at Spider Society,realizing he was Spiderpunk i.e that kid Jessica mentored too that she'd yet to meet cause he was always busy.She ran after him and introduced herself as the girl from last night.Hobie was surprised and she reached out to unmask him subcounciously so he did the same,smirking as he said 'Eager to see your pretty face again too,Gwendita' and she linked arms with him once they got a good look at eachother again as they chatted and kept walking together

So from that day on,they became best friends with crushes on eachother they never thought to hide and Hobie taught more her about punk culture,specifically afropunk and convinced her to dye her hair,which is how they had their first kiss.His hands had pink dye on them and he was leaning over her to organize things so she couldn't resist and kissed him,it being prompted by the morning of that day when Hobie said he'd never actually kissed anyone on the lips as he gave Gwen a good morning peck on the cheek and Gwen wanting to be his first.He was shocked as she let out a quick and short apology and hid her face behind her hair but he told her to do it again and she gladly did as it turned into him taking the lead

They say sappy and cutesy and just random shit to and about eachother with no shame,do haircare together,he helped her make her own battle jacket and added a Gwen-themed patch to his own,she calls him 'Hubbie' as a play on 'Hobie'(and 'Gwendita' is spanish for 'Gwendy' but cheesier)and taught him to skateboard and make dominican food,she stands up for him and has his back against his enemies and even Miguel when he gets a lil too bold despite being scared shitless of him,he takes care of her a lot like a good boyfriend does and she returns the favor and actually started this part of their relathionship which is what prompted him to treat her the way he does now,she wears Hobie's shirts as night gowns and diy'd him a blue durag with punk designs and he does pastel transfemme things with her i.e Playing pirated video games,drinking energy drinks,wearing cunty girly outfits,etc.Gwen's also a lot more brutal in her Spiderwoman tactics and started going to protests and donating to charity with her saved up money by Hobie-induced radicalization

Also genuinely not intentional but i'm convinced Hobie loves the sea a lot and Gwen's got major mermaid vibes so i mean-

Flowerbyte's wingwoman who tries to get them together by dropping hints and giving advice disguised as regular friend convos.She's basically Miles' big sister who teases her little brother about finally getting a girlfriend and he teases her about Hobie back but not nearly as effectively because at least they're officially together instead of going on totally not dates

"She's just lightskinned" < Running joke one of my black Atsv moot's who's Gwen's age keeps making

Visualization of SheTM by @kitkatperce

[imakemywings]

I'm glad they (or you did in the tags?) mentioned Maedhros because given Celebrimbors actions toward his uncle and father and later his actions at the fall of his city, I'm pretty sure Maedhros is the last person he would want to see or want for comfort (it seemed there was a general consensus that Celebrimbor would look for him of all people for comfort or something, which is weird for me because like @undercat-overdog said, most people don't rate their uncles as the most important people and he hasn't seen them for thousand years and when he did hear of them, it's the news of them committing the second and third kinslaying). I also subscribe to @aipilosse's headcanon about the feanorian brothers not being that close hence why Celebrimbor can easily ignore them because the relationship wasn't that deep to begin with. I fervently agree with you about Finrod most likely the family he would immediately live with after rebirth. Honestly, I headcanon him living with Finrod and Finarfin because I feel like that's the house where Celebrimbor would be able to heal (I subscribe to Finarfin being the best father and grandfather out of the three, sue me.). And even if Celebrimbor did start speaking with his father and uncles (and grandparents) the relationship wouldn't be the same anymore, like he's polite but there's no warmth or fluffiness or tearful reunion or something, it's not there anymore. What do you think of him and Elwing bonding over the trauma of getting screwed over and losing their city and people to a bunch of assholes?

With FULL WARNING that everything following is pure headcanon, since we don't actually get anything in canon on how Celebrimbor feels about his family (except that eventually he found them so morally repugnant he no longer wanted to associate with them), I think we're a lot in agreement here, anon.

I'm not opposed to Celebrimbor having originally been close with his uncles--every family is different and sure, it could be that his paternal uncles took a particular interest in his life. I DO think he was very close with Celegorm, if only because Celegorm was such a presence in his life, particularly in Middle-earth. However, I don't personally see him as super close with his other uncles (However, Lady_Gavroche has an excellent fic about his relationship with Caranthir that's a lot of fun!) I don't think Maedhros and Maglor were very fond of children as younger adults (Maedhros makes something of an exception for his brothers; Maglor does not), so I don't envision them taking much of a role with Celebrimbor.

However, with or without the premise that he was originally close at all with Maedhros, I WILL stand by that I don't think he wants anything to do with Maedhros after his death.

For me, it's that Celebrimbor put his foot down before arguably the worst of the Feanorians' atrocities. Leading up to his essentially disowning his paternal family, we have: Alqualonde, the burning of the ships at Losgar (either of which Celebrimbor may have personally had a hand in, we don't know), the fractious relationship with Doriath, the coup against Finrod, the kidnapping and attempted forced marriage of Luthien, and the effort to use Luthien to blackmail Thingol. Already at this point, Celebrimbor says "No, enough, I can't side with you anymore." (And I think his moral journey from someone who, in my mind, participated in the kinslaying at Alqualonde and in the ship burning at Losgar, to someone who says "No, this is wrong and we can't keep doing these things" is soooo interesting.)

AFTER Celebrimbor has already sided with Orodreth and left behind his family, THEN we have the attempted murder of Beren and Luthien by Celegorm and Curufin, the failure of Maedhros to address their actions in any way, the Second Kinslaying, the particularly cruel way Elured and Elurin were killed, the Third Kinslaying, the kidnapping of Elrond and Elros who were then held onto for an unknown number of years, the slaying of Eonwe's guard and the theft of the Silmarils AFTER everyone else had put their whole heart into defeating Melkor.

Like, they got SO much worse after Celebrimbor had already had enough. I imagine the amount of horror and revulsion he feels towards them and the things they did are quite high. And Maedhros, the guy who was head honcho for ALL of these things--Celebrimbor is supposed to get comfort from HIM? This guy? Nah man.

Celebrimbor died in agony and torment trying to prevent more death and bloodshed as a result of his creations. Maedhros decided slaughtering a bunch of other Elves was the best way to get what he wanted. I'm really not sure what they have to say to each other at this point.

We don't know anything about Celebrimbor's maternal family (although @swanmaids has seduced me on the idea of Curufin's wife going along with the rebellion of the Noldor and going with the Feanorians to Middle-earth) but even on the extended paternal branch of his family there are other people who have experience with torture, even torture by Sauron or Melkor! Maedhros is FAR from the only person with this experience!

Finrod would be my #1 choice because he, like Celebrimbor, was tortured by Sauron for information, and because I like to imagine they were somewhat close in Nargothrond, and that contributed to Celebrimbor being so disturbed by the way Celegorm and Curufin treated Finrod. (This is a fun fic about Finrod helping Celebrimbor through rebirth.)

There's Finduilas, who's captured and killed by Orcs; there's Celebrian, who's captured and put to torment; there's Orodreth who was killed by Glaurung; there's Aredhel who dies of slow poison thanks to her husband...and there are probably plenty of Celebrimbor's other friends and acquaintances and neighbors who have similar experiences and whom he can sympathize with. Even Nerdanel is likely to be a much better choice, since she at least never partook in any of that. He has options.

And I agree, IF he had interactions with his father and uncles again, it would be a very different relationship from what it might have been before. I can easily see him deciding he simply doesn't want them in his life anymore at all, full no-contact (as much as that's possible in Tirion).

As for Elwing, I think it would take her a while to come around to Celebrimbor just because he IS a Feanorian and I don't think she's especially inclined to give any of them the benefit of the doubt, not least one who created Sauron's rings of power ^.^;;; I'm also not sure how welcome he'd be around where she lives since iirc her tower is in or around Teler territory and you know, Alqualonde and all. But it's possible he wins her over. Kirta does a really interesting fic where Celebrimbor and Elwing meet before the attack on Sirion.

I also think it's fun when he gets to chat with Frodo.

ANYWAY long story long...I can zero percent see Celebrimbor seeking comfort from Maedhros, and honestly, it would be INCREDIBLY audacious (derogatory) for Maedhros to assume Celebrimbor would WANT comfort or support from him at this point.

[mari-lair]

quick question

if, hypothetically, teru and akane became official boyfriends for a while now and then the grim reaper arc happened (tho minus for the aoikane attempting to kiss part? and teru just interrupted their hugging and emotional conversation?)

i just wonder how terukane would act differently i guess? like would teru mostly stand closely next to akane and sometimes glare(?) at aoi for hurting his bf that badly? and then would akane feel so betrayed that teru didn't tell him about how aoi can't go with them to the near shore since she's dead? would their relationship be strained after the severance but started to mend it during that terukane chapter?

just a hypothetical question

That’s such an interesting question!

I think a lot would be different in the reaper arc if terukane was established. Akane would likely know of his boyfriend patrol in obon and go to him for help, since nene also trusts Teru at this point in the manga, there wouldn't be any protest. They would go with him and very likely 'rescue' Aoi while still on No.6 boundary. 

But, let’s suppose, hypothetically speaking, that Akane doesn’t know his boyfriend is doing patrol, so he still follows Nene to the elevator and gets betrayed by Aoi. I wonder how she would trick him into being stabbed? She might still kiss him (?) but I don’t think so, that scene is full of romance in canon, from the way Akane holds her and she cradles his cheeks, to how he looks at her... Akane wouldn’t let that vibe happen if he was already happily dating Teru.

Using Teru as a distraction might work though, so let's suppose Aoi found something to say that would shock Akane enough to be stabbed, if that happens, I personally don’t think he would drag her to hell? Cause Akane is a romantic fool, he wanted to die with her, he couldn’t let go of his love. While I have no doubt he would still dearly love his best friend, I don’t think he would be able to focus only on her, it wouldn't be an all consuming love. He might get up from pure drive like  “I can’t die yet, Teru wouldn’t like that. But I won't let go of you either. Ever.” and try to knock Aoi out and drag her back to school somehow. He got stabbed tho, so he will faint from blood lost, get smacked by No.6 if he find a way not to... Regardless, he would fail.

But, hypothetically speaking, if he still dragged Aoi to ‘hell’ and Teru saved them, there would be more difference in Akane’s behavior than Teru, cause in canon Akane was genuinely surprised to be rescued, he respected teru but didn’t consider him a person that would go to the depts of the far chore to rescue others, even if he already knew Teru was an exorcist and this is technically his job, so his view on Teru went up in that arc. In this AU they are dating, he wouldn’t be surprised teru is a genuinely good person at his core, he would be expecting to see his boyfriend, openly delighted to see him! It will be kisses as a greeting and a fond 'took ya long enough'

Teru would be more gentle with Akane, poke the wound with his hand instead of his sword, like "you're getting blood on me" and offer his help to climb the rocky terrain. Akane will keep an eye on Aoi since she is his bff and they just had a heart-to-heart (plus the whole supernatural thing is new to her), but he won't be as clingy. At least not with her. Teru will offer to carry him and Akane will go “i’m fine, i can walk by myself” but still lean on him for support when there aren't any monsters to be slayed around.

I can’t picture Teru giving Aoi-chan side glares. He can tell Aoi regrets her actions, and he trusts Akane’s judgment, if Akane forgives Aoi, clearly happy to have worked through some of her problems, Teru won’t hold it against her (It's not like teru isn't familiar with hurting akane when he doesn't know how to handle his issues/stress even if he never went as far as to stab him). Teru also knows she will be left behind on the far shore all alone so he isn’t going to be mean to her, his attitude toward her is similar to normal.

They would still fight when Akane realizes Aoi was left behind, it will be strained but not break, cause Akane does want comfort, and while his trust was betrayed, he can see teru was right to keep the info to himself, if he had said the truth, Akane would have just panic but have no solution to offer.

the "arcade date" chap will annoy/hurt Akane greatly, cause dates with Teru are very rare (busy bastard) and this would put a somber undertone to an activity he usually really treasures. But I think the 'date' with nene's third wheeling would already be enough to smooth the strain of their relationship, cause Akane is ridiculously forgiving to those he love. When they get to the terukane chapter they are already good.

[dizzydizney]

Hello!

So I was thinking about college and what the vks and aks would choose for a major, but you know, in every fic there's the stereotypical mal-fine arts, evie-fashion design, jay-sports scholarship, carlos-computer science, ben-king etc

(which are gret and very fitting) but what if those weren't options?

Like, I could tottaly see jay as an architect, fumbling with papers and huge A1 sheets full of crooked buildings, led covered hands and shirts, hair tied up in a bun and held in place by pencils

and carlos maybe a physics or chemistry major (or very early phd cause he's an absolute genius), mad scientist vibes and all that good stuff

Mal could surely pull off a forestry & environmental sciences degree, being an activist and trying to become the voice of the fae residing in the auradon forests, those that are forgotten by the law

oh! and audrey being in the same major as mal, preparing for her future ruling on the throne of roses

Chef!Ben my beloved < 3

Entitled cop chad or kind-hearted musician chad????

Doctor!Evie, cause being exhausted by the constant pressureof school AND about having the lives of your patients in your hands is totally on brand for her

Wow, this got long, sorry I'm just rumbling and haven't even touched the sea three

I really want to hear your opinions though

Oh my gosh okay so first of all, love all these suggestions! They're definitely less conventional and less popular but that just makes them more fun to hear!

But honestly, Mal doing anything in the arts would be wonderful. Aside from spray paint and one doodle, we didn't see her do much in canon even though we know it's an interest of hers. She didn't have time to pursue it like Evie with fashion or Jay with sports. So I'd be fine with that. But her being an environmentalist is also good. I LOVe the tie to nature and her faerie heritage. That's something worth exploring

Jay as an architect is interesting. You provided a very lovely visual to go with it 😍 I could get behind it. Like imagine he just gains an interest in architect from all his parkour and scaling buildings sksks. That'd be so funny

I also feel like we didn't get a lot of Carlos's hobbies in the movies either?? It was Dude, Jane, and sport that he didn't even like. I do love mad science vibes for Carlos, but I could see him doing a ton of stuff. I love the idea of this Cruella being the head of a huge fashion house like Glenn Close's Cruella, and Carlos learning the ropes at that. But using his tech genius mind in the fashion industry. Creating sustainable pieces out of recycled material, and mingling wearable fashion with modern tech. Basically slaying the entire "Fashion in the Age of Technology" Met Gala better than anyone who actually went. But he's my fave of the Core Four, he can do literally anything

Could so see Doctor!Evie happening. She's a caregiver, she would want to do what she can to save people. But I could also see her being an activist, or doing the whole fashion meets technology thing. But yeah, these characters are versatile, you don't always have to pin them to one interest and one future only

Love activist!Audrey as well. Ooh, or could see her doing something with animals. Bring back first book Audrey where she's just a sweetheart angel and woodland creatures flock to her side

Chef!Ben... You said it all. Would love an au where his biggest responsibility is running the most popular boulangerie in town

Haven't really thought about Chad a lot. Don't like the idea of anyone being a cop lmao buuut something "entitled" would suit him. Literally I just see him as some cheesy social media influencer sksksk

And yeah this is long so I won't start on the Sea Three lol we can save that! But I loved the long ask so don't apologize about being in my inbox lol I love you for it! ❣️❣️❣️

[hungarianbee]

Way of the Witcher: bits of lore

Disclaimer:  Post contains spoilers to the Witcher games These things may be canon-typical, but the following trigger warnings apply if you want to check out the cards: gore, monster dismemberment, needles, body horror, insects and spiders

“In a world plagued by horrors and monstrosities humanity desperately needed a new type of weapon to turn back the tide. Created by ingenious Alzur, witchers — professional monster slayers of exceptional strength, speed, and agility were tasked to end the threat once and for all. Organized into different schools they honed their craft and passed their knowledge onto novices in training. Some of them were destined to become the legendary heroes and protectors of humanity. Others — the very thing they were supposed to fight…”

Since the gwent expansion was anounced I followed it with rapt attention; every bit of lore is a gem in my eyes. I decided to write down my thoughts of the cards and lore pieces revealed in a post. Share that knowledge around, amirite?

The post references Gwent cards which were leaked (2020 november-december). The theme is mutation and everything that comes with it; namely sweet-sweet lore of the lesser known witcher schools: the Bears, Cats, Vipers and Griffins.

Tucker in, under the cut there is 4.5k analysis of each card that came out.

We’re starting with a theme, then work our way throught the 4 schools (each contain the following:  a leader, a mentor, an adept, a general witcher, a specific job, an item, a school relevant monster, 2  known witchers and a location), then go through a Witcher 1 throwback, Salamandra, and round it with a few new monsters and neutral cards. 

While I describe most of the cards concisely and all the known witchers and locations are on my blog, you might want to look the cards in their (small) glory: [DO IT HERE]

Sounds good? Here we go!

Edit: [this source is better]

The theme is mutation - be it monsters created by transmutation, witchers or salamadra

If that is true, there are monster cards that seemingly stand out: the Succubus and the Phooca

If we are to believe that they do connect to the mutation theme, then

(1) we can conclude that Phoocas (a rare, and more dangerous form of Nekkers; they can pull your head off by sheer force, watch out) are a natural mutation of the original species,

(2) but we’re still left with the Succubi (an inherently demonic creature). They might have chosen it because of its appearance: succubi have horns and goat-like legs. (Note: in the graphic novel “House of Glass” the succubus character has wings, but lacks hooves. In that sense, she could be mutated.)

Breaking it down into factions/schools (some of the cards can be paired up; these cards are interpreted together):

School of the Viper: starting with the vipers, because they are my favourite

Viper Witcher Mentor & Viper Witcher Adept: the flavour text says that the Viper mentors are exceptionally cold and ruthless, and that’s underlined by the story the art tells: the mentor busies himself with sharpening a blade, and in the background we can see the adept attempting to kill his best friend goat, as was ordered. The mentor watches this from the corner of his eye. Young Vipers are to kill their pets (which they nurtured for years) before becoming a fully-fledged witcher. The latter could mean that the boy depicted on the card hasn’t even gone through the Trial of Grasses.

Viper Witcher: On the card we see an unknown Viper crouching over a royalty he killed. I feel like this type of card is meant to represent what we think a general Witcher of said school would be like. Apparently Vipers just like to slay the nobility *shrug*. The flavour text informs us, that Vipers call their two swords “fangs”, and that their style consists of fast and furious attack aimed to overwhelm the enemy.

Viper Witcher Alchemist: Every school has a specialty; Vipers are proficient in potion or poison making. The right side of the alchemist’s face seems to have healed burn marks; a blown up concoction might have caused it.

Ivar Evil-Eye: So far there’s little to know about Ivar. He was either the Master of the Viper Keep, or the founder himself (gwent suggests the latter). He’s described as heavily scarred (facial scars suggests burns and slash marks too), and each of them has a terrible story to tell.

Warritt the All-Seeing: Warritt is a (newly introduced) Viper with heavy disfiguration to the upper part of his face: his eyes are sealed shut (possibly by burn marks, though his hair remains intact). The art shows Warritt drawing a modified version of the Supirre sign in the air to help with his loss of sight. As the wiki says: “Supirre is a Sign used for eavesdropping. Drawn on a solid surface, it allows the people near this surface to listen nearby conversations which would be normally inaudible due to the distance or background noise.” It was only used in Sapkowsky’s second volume of the Hussite trilogy (not yet translated to English), which is entirely separate from the Witcher novels.

Kolgrim: Fate laughed at this Viper. As a kid he was swapped by a weeper, saved by a witcher, than rejected by his own mother who believed that the fake child was the real one. Later, as a grown witcher Ivar instructed him to find a lost weapon diagram. On his journey he was accused - ironically - in White Orchard of kidnapping a child. Invoking a Temerian law, Kolgrim was told to cleanse their crypt (as seen on the card) then he can go. The truth is revealed in Witcher 3 - Kolgrim was beheaded by the villagers before he could even step into the crypt. To add insult to injury: the child was eaten by a drowner. The gwent card therefore shows the optimistic outcome: that Kolgrim reached the crypt and passed in battle. And what’s up with a crypt full of wraiths anyway? White Orchard is shady, guys. (Lil’ trivia: Kolgrim’s eyes are yellow-green.)

Vypper: Basically an overgrown snake that likes damp marshes (they even fight the local kikimores for territory). They only relate to the mutation theme by their nature - they resemble the “school’s animal”.

Gorthur Gvaed: The Bloodgate Keep is located in the chasms of the Tir Tochair mountains. It’s built so high were you to look down from the bridge leading into the keep, you would only see fog (one could wonder how the vipers trained in these conditions). The bridge is made so that you’d have to cross the lookout tower - it might have served as a check in spot. The post itself is circled by the stone coils of a snake; the top is open and has a huge lit bonfire in the middle for warmth-keeping and possibly signaling. Unluckily, it didn’t stop the Usurper’s army from destroying the keep.

Coated Weapons: They leaned heavily into the alchemy and assassin side of the school. Vipers coat their blades with an acidic liquid, so they can kill a man with a nick of it.

School of the Cat:

Cat Witcher Mentor & Cat Witcher Adept: On the adept card we can see a young Cat walking the tightrope blindfolded (they start with close to the ground and slowly increase the distance with time); the mentor is looking up at him. Like the Vipers, Cat mentors are nonchalant about risking the kids as seen from the flavour text: “If you fall, it’s over. Your nine lives are up, kid.” Furthermore, the background of the Cat Witcher Adept card shows the not yet destroyed Stygga Citadel. The Cat Witcher Mentor is in the same scene and we can see lots of potatoes and cabbages; cats definitely eat their veggies.

Cat Witcher: The card shows a Cat in the heat of battle mid-jump; his hood is up, blood is flying everywhere. The flavour text emphasizes that cats are known for their mad bloodlust, not stopping killing even after the enemy capitulated.

Cat Witcher Saboteur: A Cat perches next to the window, a smoking bomb in hand, eavesdropping on nobles. A rope is hung from somewhere out of the pic, possibly for a quick exit. Vesemir comments that these are many-a deeds the cats did that taint the reputation of witchers.

Gezras of Leyda: Gezras is a not yet known redheaded Cat witcher. Following the pattern he seems to be the founder of the Cat School. His flavour text shows that even back then (when the mutagens made Cats emotionless) they were inclined to dislike humans: “Take a contract from Aen Seidhe over a dh’oine any day, as you’re far less likely to receive a knife between the ribs in place of coin.”

Brehen: Now this cat embodies the Cat madness. He’s known as the Cat of Iello because he massacred everyone there. He was consequently shunned by all the schools, and he was even convinced that Vesemir put a kill order on his head. He met Geralt later in the 1240s on his way to claim the bounty for the princess. Thinking that Geralt was there to rob him of his chance of the bounty, Brehen took a priestess as hostage (this is what we see on the gwent card). Geralt managed to convince him to put away the blade, and they parted without crossing blades. When meeting with the striga he scoffed into her face that “she won’t be his first royal”. But his luck ran out. The Temerians buried him and fabricated the story of a cowardly witcher stealing their coin. I’m halfway convinced we see Brehen in the netflix series.

Gaetan: This boy broke into the fandom like a bulldozer. After the folks in Honorton cheated him of his pay and tried to kill him, Gaetan flew into rage and killed everyone there except Millie, a girl who reminded him of his sister. That’s the scene we see on the card. And then Geralt robs/kills him.

Saber-Tooth Tiger (Stealth): Another huge animal/monster related to the school. It’s story is this: “The prized possession of royal menagerie, until a commando of Scoia’tael assaulted the exhibition, released the beast, and set it upon its cruel masters. Since that day, it has acquired a selective taste for human flesh.” Another cat turning against humans.

Stygga Castle: An outside view of what we already saw on the Cat Witcher Adept card. It’s located on a cliff, and the sun shines into it just right (so that the Cats can bask in the light). The walls form a circle where they shelter the inner grounds, and a bigger tower emerges in the middle. The Castle could be reached by the thin bridge connecting it to the mainland, or by the cliffs (if one is brave enough).

Making a Bomb: Cats seem to have a specialty in bombs. Guess where Lambert got his interest from *winkwink*

School of the Griffin: lots of pairs in this one

Griffin Witcher Mentor & Griffin Witcher Adept: Compared to the other schools, this pairing is tame - the adept is climbing a tree to retrieve a crossbow bolt. We can see the mentor in the background. On the mentor card the adept waves down with the retrieved crossbow bolt in hand. It shows a kind of comradeship that’s not present in the other 3 schools. The flavour text emphasizes the importance of knowledge. Students are afforded to choose their final Trial: recite the entire Liber Tenebrum (Book of Shadows; one of Keldar’s favourite books) or steal a griffin’s egg. Noone’s chosen the former.

Griffin Witcher: The witcher is shown shooting down a griffin. According to the flavour text they prefer hunting with silver-tipped arrowheads instead of swords.

Archgriffin & Griffin Witcher Ranger: On the Griffin Ranger card we see the witcher crouching over track marks. On the archgriffin card he found the albino (or very old) monster, who’s already killed someone (probably a lumberjack, judging by the axe). According to the flavour text, Griffin Witchers are trained to be professional trackers; nothing can stop them to reach their prey. Even though archgriffins are considered the embodiment of courage, loyalty and fighting spirit, the gwent card corrects the notion that the Griffin Witcher were named after the monster. In truth, they got the name in honour of their founder’s mentor, a knight named Gryphon.

Erland of Larvik: Continuing the trend, Erland is the founder of the Griffin School (one of the two that are confirmed 100%). He’s from the first generation of witcher, mutated by Alzur himself. After the Order began fracturing he had a confrontation with Arnaghan (who’ll be the founder of the bear school). Arnaghad almost killed one of his brothers, slashed Erland across the face then parted ways with the Order and left Morgraig Castle with his own group. Seeing that the the remaining witchers couldn’t go on like that, he grabbed his 13 best friend and left to Kaer Seren, where (after purging it from spectres) he founded the Griffin School which focused on magic, preparedness and flexibility. His teaching emphasized knightly values (mimicking his long-dead mentor, a knight named Gryphon) in hopes that it would make future witchers’ life easier. It didn’t.

Coen & Keldar: The cards are mainly connected by background. Coen is finished killing what appears to be an albino arachas (but it’s definitely an insectoid), while Keldar’s taking notes. We can rightly assume that he’s updating their bestiary, since he’s one of the teachers/mentors who focus on gathering and sharing knowledge. Coen’s flexibility shows in the flavour text: “There is no such thing as a fair fight. Every advantage and every opportunity that arises is used in combat.” Not very knightly, is it?

Kaer Seren: The “Star Keep” Erland and his friends fled to. It was used by the Order’s mages to mutate witchers (that’s why it was haunted by spectres). It’s located at the edge of the Dragon mountains by the sea between Poviss and Kovir. It’s said to possess the great library, which later mages tried to get for themselves. They messed up: by bringing down an avalanche on the Keep, that knowledge was destroyed. The keep was badly damaged and many witchers died.

Target Practice: The Griffin School’s specialty is their precise aim - they “can split an apple in two from a hundred paces”.

School of the Bear:

Bear Witcher Mentor & Bear Witcher Adept: The adept card shows that young witcher are taught to catch fish by hand (just like their school relevant animal). On the mentor card the elder witcher leads a group of younglings in the mountains; possibly out to teach tracking. The cards are connected by flavour text. The young Bear witcher-would-be’s need to complete the Trial of the Mountain, which consists of them climbing Mount Gorgon (also known as the Devil Mountain; it is the highest peak of the Amell range) to retrieve a runestone. The Trial often ends with the kids frozen to death. The Bear Mentor card’s flavour confirms it: “If you’re unsure of the way, just keep a lookout for markers - the frozen corpses of would-be witchers.” This sounds ominous - don’t they collect their fallen?

Bear Witcher: Bears are solitary hunters as seen in the flavour text: “life alone can be tough”. The witcher in the pic just dismembered what looks like a ghoul (with a tail?).

Bear Witcher Quartermaster: This one I like. The Quartermaster is an amputee (missing one of his arms, which was taken by a bear; must have won that fight one-handed), yet they still found a job for him where he can be useful. His flavour text suggest he likes Mahakam mead.

Arnaghad: The founder of the Bear School, he never felt kinship with his fellow witchers. After attacking a witcher named Rhys over a contract, wounding him deeply from shoulder to waist, he returned to Morgraig, attacked Erland then left with his possé to found the Bear School - Haern Caduch - in the Amell Mountains. Later he almost died in a betrayal, which resulted in another schism and the foundation of the Viper School.

Gerd: Gerd’s a legendary witcher who fled to Skellige after allying with a Usurper instead of his daughter, who later issued a warrant for his arrest. He has a busy time in Skellige: first slaying a dragon, befriending the Jarl Torgeir, killing a bunch of sirens, losing so many weapon diagrams you wouldn’t believe, losing half his pay and silver sword on gwent, escaping Nilfgaard and managing to slay a striga, killing some of his pursuers, only to be caught up in the siege of Torgeir’s castle, where he died in the ruins. On the card he’s showing Bear-typical strength: he’s tearing apart a siren with his bear hands.

Junod of Belhaven: Junod had a dubious background, but was thought to be the child of a brave dwarf and a giantess. He’s a huge man, with a big bushy beard and bald head. His sobriquet is false; he took it after Ivo, because he liked the ring of it. He was known as a strict haggler and a bit of a gambler. In 1243 he took a contract in hopes of cash (he wanted to forge the Grandmaster Ursine Armour). The subterranean monster was said to live in the caverns. Junod drew bear signs and wrote a warning on the wall (this is the scene we see on the card). He was however ill-prepared; the beast turned out to be a shaelmaar (a type of relic Gaetan slew once) that killed him in that very cavern.

Dire Bear: Once again related to the school in question, the Dire Bear is stuck with so much weaponry that it looks like a walking armory. Lots of witchers must have tried to slay it, yet it still kicks - just like Bear Witchers, it’s resilient till the very end.

Haern Caduch: Built into the side of the Amell Mountains, it’s the coldest environment of all the schools. As with the other schools, the Bears were forced out of it due to folk riots. It was left in disrepair to be buried under snow and ice (as seen on the card). It’s name could be translated as “Piercing Whiskers”.

Armor Up: As Bear’s are more likely to stand in the way of attack than dodge, they need to wear a heavy armour at all times.

Salamandra:

Roland Bleinheim & Gellert Bleinheim: Witcher 1 characters. They are thought to be brothers, leading the Salamandra organization. As drug lords one heads the fisstech operation in Vizima’s sewers (Roland), the other in the swamps (Gellert). The flavour text pretty much matches: both of them wondering what the other one is doing.

Salamandra Mage: The art itself was already leaked in China around 2 years back, and there were a few theories. One of them was that the man depicted is Zerrikanian, and I think that’s correct. Both the facial tattoo, darker skin, thinly braided hair and fire magic points in that direction. Azar Javed (a known Salamandra fire mage) happens to be a Zerrikanian escapee too.

Salamandra Lackey: A girl with the Salamandra-stapled mask runs from a city guard. The flavour text says the following: “Lackeys are expected to perform their first five jobs for no pay, demonstrating their passion for the gig.” The organization monitors from the beginning that only those remain who are extremely loyal to their cause.

Fallen Rayla: A little background for those who are unfamiliar with her: Rayla of Lyria was a veteran of the Nilgaardian Wars. She harbours anti-nonhuman sentiments after she was captured by Scoia’taels and severely maimed. The Rayla we see on the card is a mutant - in Witcher 1 she was supposedly shot down by Scoia’tael, and Salamandra found her close to death, subjected her to mutation. She was killed by Geralt.

Salamander: The card shows a bright blue spotted salamander. It has two tails and heads (possibly grown together?). The Salamander is a symbol of the organization. Metaphorically speaking it could mean, that Salamandra thought of itself as something untouchable: “best to avoid petting them, as the salamander, when threatened, secretes a deadly toxin”.

Failed Experiment: The card - ironically - thrives when it’s poisoned. The “experiment” only resembles a human in shape. It’s clutching the table ends, as if trying to escape still.  It’s fair to assume that they later dissected it: “even failed experiments can serve a purpose”.

Salamandra Abomination: A step further from the failed experiment - we see the results of pushing science’s boundaries. Only the skull is left intact, everything else of the body is covered with insectoid-like growths.

Stolen Mutagens: Gruesome organ harvesting. The witcher heart (?) glows, which is either an artistic decision (probable) or the mages sent magic into the body, and the mutagens light up (like angiographia). Three types of mutagens can be harvested: red (strength), blue (magic) or green (resilience). I headcanon that the amount they inject of the three types can vary - that’s how you get strength inclined witchers like the wolves (red), or big ass mothers like the bears (green).

Salamandra Hideout: There are multiple hideouts in Witcher 1 (outskirt of Visima, crypt in sewers and one in the trade quarters). The one depicted here is the fisstech lab in the sewers. It shows a dimly lit, cobwebbed room. There’s an elevation where a body lays on the table. The elevation’s floor is gridded, so the blood and other fluids can freely flow down into the sewer water, where many bodies are already discarded recklessly.

Neutral:

Alzur & Viy & Koshchey: Alzur was a charismatic mage and spell inventor, who created many horrible monsters, like the koshchey (with the spell: Alzur’s Double Cross) and the Viy (a huge centipede-like insectoid). He was also the one who did the lion’s share of work with the witcher’s mutation.

Cosimo Malaspina: Cosimo was the teacher of Alzur. He was known for his knowledge in hybridization and genetic modification. Him and Alzur were the true creators of the witchers sect. On the gwent card, three man are shown prodding at a mutated body. Cosimo (the old dude) is in the middle, Alzur might be the one on the left and that leaves Idarran on the right. His flavour text paints him as cold and clinical, someone without empathy: “Children keep asking him for gifts. He doesn’t know why, but it really helps with finding subjects for his experiments.”

Idarran of Ulivo & Idr & Wererat: Idarran was one of the contributers of the witcher experiments. He’s an expert in hybridization and genetic modification, whose teacher was Alzur. He was a pale kid who lived in the canals of Vizima and experimented on rats at the age of 5. He found beauty in gruesome creations, like the Wererat (a human-sized rat on roids) and the Idr (a big centipede-like insectoid). He’s disdained by Geralt for his many monsters.

Triangle within a Triangle: It’s a magic spell used to introduce a series of mutations and to greatly increase the mass of a given body. That way they can create huge monstrosities, like the koshchey. Adepts often confuse it with a pentagram which can lead to infernal disasters.

Selective mutation: The card shows a close up of a young man’s eyes - one mutated (catlike) one human. His skin shows his high toxicity level, ashen with prominent veins. He’s held down as alchemists prepare to inject a yellow concoction into the human eye. It’s possible that after the success of witchers the mages tried to recreate the changes in smaller scale, then unmake it in turn, unsuccessfully.

Witcher Student: This is not really a card, but I included it anyway. The card’s ability is - ironically - doomed, and to add insult to injury, its flavour text is the following well-known fact: “Four out of ten boys survive… at most.” It’s also a point for black humour that the gwent commentators added: the Trial of Grasses card boosts this unit significantly.

Berengar: He’s a Wolf School Witcher who blamed his school for denying him a normal life and consequently abandoned them. In Witcher 1 Geralt can decide to kill or spare him. In a letter he admits that he was a coward because he betrayed Kaer Morhen and worked with Salamadra in hope that they can undo his mutation. His card references a questline in Witcher 1, where he tried to reason with the vodyanoi (~lovecraftian fish people) to spare the village’s prize-winning cow, named Strawberry. This is non-canon; in the game Geralt takes over the quest to do this instead.

Leo: Another Witcher 1 character. He was an orphan taken in by Vesemir. He was a kind-hearted but hot-headed man, who had all the training but not the mutations and the experience - he never killed a man. The flavour text of his gwent card kind of mocks his death: “He would have caught the arrow if he only had some heads-up.” He’s burned on a pyre and his cenotaph can be found south of Kaer Morhen.

Geralt: Quen: The last classical sign that wasn’t yet a card. In the art, Geralt is wearing the Manticore armour

Snowdrop: She’s a not yet seen character; impish looking female bard with light blond hair (flowers braided on the side) who plays a medieval version of the fiddle to a rooster. There’s a horseshoe hanging from the hem of his pants. She’s also seen in the gwent: journey #3 launch trailer. She’s narrating that she was saved by Alzur. Alzur told her about his plans of creating witchers to fight the beasts of the Continent, and she admired him so much she spread his story (”let me tell you about the greatest sorceress to ever lived”). Their story will unveil in the next week, I’ll probably update accordingly. It’s also interesting that Alzur says in the gwent intro (regarding witchers): “Bards will toil to do justice to their feats.” As if his own successes and experiences will be mirrored in his creations. Projecting much?

Monsters:

Viy & Idr: both of them are centipede-like insectoids conjured by infamous mages (see: Alzur and Idarran)

Wererat: same can be said about this one. Idarran experimented on Vizima’s sewer rats since the age of 5. This human sized abomination was the end result.

Succubus: We already discussed how the “Succubus” doesn’t fit the theme. Other interesting thing is the surrounding of her - in the background we can see a skull full of some kinda of dark liquid; she’s also holding a goblet. I’m not saying she’s drinking blood, but if she does, it would shed some questions as succubi don’t need to drink blood at all.

Phooca: As nekkers’ rare big brother, phoocas are ogroids that have the strength to rip a man’s head off with their bear hands. According to the wiki, in Celtic folklore they are regarded as shapeshifting fairies.

Koshchey: A witcher 1 boss, koshcheys are spider-like abominations summoned by mages. The woman standing her ground in the picture is Visenna (Geralt’s druid mom). In the story she’s the one to kill the first koshchey ever created.

Spontaneous Evolution: Under the Red Moon the wolf mutated into an amalgamation of eyes and teeth. Malaspina possibly added something to the mix that proved unstable. The card’s name is kind of ironic - this change is not spontaneous (it was induced) but could be related to evolution (it would imply that this form is somehow advantageous to the current environment and helps adaptation). (Note: in my opinion spontaneous generation would be a better term: it’s the thought that living creatures could arise from nonliving matter.)

Hybrid: the card shows a two-headed wolf or dog. Pretty straight-forward.

Chimera: A creature created my Cosimo Malaspina. He combines the genes of a fiend and griffin, then added a trace of insectoid and wyvern. It kind of looks like a furred wyvern with antlers. Interestingly the frightener (an insectoid; a rare result of magical experiment) is also called a chimera.

Dol Dhu Lokke: a new monster lair location. The depending on how you translate “lokke” the Elder can be read as “black valley place” or “alluring black valley”. It’s so dangerous - housing many-a horrors - that even a witcher thinks twice before going near it.

Interesting tidbits

Coen has hair, which is weird because so far he was described in all sources as bald.

There used to be a card  that was also called Viper Witcher, which is now referred to as “Kingslayer”

The Bear Witcher’s face was drawn after one of CDPR’s employee.

The Koshchey’s card title has a typo: “Koschchey”.

Easter eggs (mainly in flavour text)

The Spontaneous Evolution card references The Powerpuff Girls intro: “Professor Malaspina accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction - compound X.”

The Bear Witcher card might reference a song of Baloo from the Jungle Book (The Bare Necessities): “Life alone on the road can be tough - be sure to bring all the bare necessities.”

[oloreaa]

Vencuyanir Ch. 5 - The Razor Crest

vencuyanir [ven-COO-yah-neer]: sustain, keep alive, preserve

Summary: After Bean’s display of power, Elana waits for him to wake up… and it is not easy with the stubborn Mandalorian

Words: 5.7k

Notes: Thank you for the feedback on the last chapter! I hope you will enjoy reading this one as well!! One of my fav moments of Ven is in here :)

Warnings: references to canon-typical violence, distress for child, discussion of loss/grief

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……………

"Is he still sleeping?" Elana could hear someone say, mind fuzzy and the world spinning around her as the darkness finally receded from her mind.

"Yes," another one answered, his voice familiar.

"Was he injured?"

"I don't think so." A tall figure, rifle slung across his back. "Not physically." Something reflecting off him, rust red armour and silver pauldron.

"Explain it to me again. I still don't understand what happened." Kuiil. Kuiil the Ugnaught. The farmer on Arvala-7.

"Neither do I." Silver beskar helmet, black T-visor, the Mandalorian.

Elana opened her eyes wider, beyond the slits that had just made out the rough shapes of the two men. The setting sun was directly facing them, and she sat up with a groan, squinting at the sky. What happened? Slowly, her senses came back to her, the rushing in her ears became quieter and the scent of machine oil and rock dust filled her nose. Her mouth was as dry as the desert.

"Ah, you're awake," the voice of Kuiil greeted her. He was sitting on top of his blurrg, swaying in the seat with every step the steed took.

"What-?" Elana rasped out, feeling as if her chest was caving in, "Bean?"

"He's here," the Mandalorian said quietly, and her head whipped around to the voice right next to her, his voice instantly making her tense. He was sitting, a pile of his ship parts behind him, and the pram floated next to the sled they were on. She scrambled over to it, not caring as her side brushed his knees, reached into the pod and took her baby out. Bean was a small, lifeless bundle in her arms, the bond between them empty, echoing when she tried to reach him, a stark contrast to the vivid and warm tendrils that had connected them before that swell of force had overwhelmed her.

"What happened to him?" Elana asked the Mandalorian, voice shaking as her fingers traced over Bean's little face. He was still breathing, thank the Stars, snoring peacefully, but she could feel nothing from him. Not the slightest emotion, no indication that they were even bonded at all. It was not as if the bond had snapped, more that it just flickered out of existence.

Elana snapped her face up to the beskar helmet, "What happened to him?" She did not recognize her own voice, guttural and venomous as she threw the accusation into his face, body trembling under the fury that rushed through her.

"Nothing," he said, voice rough.

"I don't believe you," she spat, "I told you that he should have stayed! What were you thinking, taking him to get a Mudhorn egg? He could have died!"

"I protected him," the Mandalorian defended himself, aggression pouring off him in waves, "I did my best."

"Your best is not enough if my baby had to stop a charging Mudhorn for you!" Elana shrieked, and pushed his pauldron roughly, uncaring about the repercussions, white hot anger overtaking every rational thought.

The Mandalorian grunted as if in pain, and Elana stopped, feeling cold. Suddenly she saw how banged up he looked, completely covered in mud splatters, his armour dented and broken into pieces, his chest plate looking as if it needed a complete replacement. His dirty T-visor was staring her down accusingly. Before Elana's eye, the memory of what Bean saw flickered to life, how the Mudhorn had rammed the Mandalorian, sent him flying through the air. Her mind raced at hyperspeed as she stared at him.

A part in Elana wanted to apologise, for her shove, which probably caused some amount of pain or added to existing injuries, and her words because it was obvious that he had at least tried to keep Bean safe. The pram was free from mud, free from damage, and if it were not for the missing bond, she would have thought that Bean was simply catching up on his midday nap. The difference between them could not have been bigger, and it only highlighted the effort the Mandalorian had taken to make sure Bean was safe. But still, the baby had used whatever that power in him was to help slay the Mudhorn. Elana had always known that Bean was special. Not only the bond between them, but also the way he would always land lightly, always know whom to trust, could always react a second faster than expected. She had always been able to do some of the things he was able to do as well, to an extent, but she was nowhere near as strong as her little baby was.

"Explain two things to me," the Mandalorian said, voice leaving no room for arguments, "One, how was he," he pointed to the pram, "able to stop that charging Mudhorn for me?" The bounty hunter threw her words back at her, mud-speckled visor trained directly on her. Elana opened her mouth to answer, but he cut her off, "And two, how do you know about it?"

They stared at each other, and for one moment, she did not know what to say. The truth? Some version of it? Straight up lying? Her eyes flickered between Bean, the ground, the Mandalorian, the rocks around them, the shiny parts of the ship, while she opened and closed her mouth several times, unsure what to say. Taking a deep breath when the Mandalorian sighed impatiently, she started to talk in a hesitant manner.

"I don't know why he can do that," she confessed, blinking fast as she furrowed her brows, deep in thought as she tried to find a way to explain the uniqueness of Bean, "I don't know if he was born with it, if it is something that is specific to his species, or he learned it somehow." The blurrg gave a low growl in response to something on the road, and she used this small break to sort out her thoughts. "Sometimes he can lift things, and sometimes he can't, even if he tries. And I think this is why your client wants Bean," she whispered, "they want him for what he can do." It was quiet between them, the words hanging in the air.

"Answer my second question," the Mandalorian ordered, tilting his helmet in a threatening manner. She felt her chest hollow with fear, but raised her chin with defiance despite her trembling bottom lip, and glared at him. "We are connected in our minds," was what she settled on, "What he feels, I feel as well."

"That's impossible," the bounty hunter scoffed, turning his head towards Kuiil as if to gather a second opinion. Kuiil harrumphed, face set into a frown when he looked over his shoulder.

"I have heard of stories like these," the Ugnaught said haltingly. "Stories in which great warriors have bonded within their minds to become more efficient in battle." Kuiil caught her gaze, and nodded gravely. "Even if I have not heard of a child and its caretaker being bound in this manner, I would not dismiss her claims. It could very well be."

The Mandalorian's helmet was turned towards them, and she tightened her hold on Bean. His visor was trained on them, and Elana looked away, clenching her jaw, thumb tracing over the baby's cheek. The blurrg moved slowly and steadily, and they made rest after it had long become dark. Not a word was said as the Ugnaught and her shared a meal while the Mandalorian sat behind the large pile of parts for the Razor Crest, eating on his own. When they went to sleep that night, Elana could not get the strange feeling out of her chest, the memory of what Bean had done echoing in her mind, the way she had felt it through her body.

The next day passed, and other than a few words between Kuiil and the Mandalorian, nothing was said. Elana spent the entire time either holding Bean, watching the landscape lost in her thoughts, or glaring at the Mandalorian. It was one of the most uncomfortable days she had ever had the displeasure to witness, and she was still absolutely fuming. Elana stewed in silence, laying out argument after argument with which she could verbally destroy the bounty hunter. More and more complex wording and phrasing started to pop up in her mind, and with a distinct sense of vindication she slowly felt like she could rip him a new one successfully.

Not that she actually voiced them out loud.

Elana still wanted to live, thank you very much.

The threat of him becoming violent again made her bite her tongue, swallow the accusations down, because Bean would not be safe if she got gunned down. Elana had to stay alive for Bean, she had to make sure that he had someone that cared about him, someone who gives him the love he deserved. She had not let go of Bean the entire time they traveled, unwilling to put him into his pram even as he got heavy, just wanting to feel him against her, breathing steadily, even if the bond between them was nothing but an empty echo.

When they set out on the next day, Kuiil tried to strike up conversation, clearly as done with the uncomfortable silence as she was. It continued the entire day long, small talk occasionally breaking up the tension in the air that could be cut with a knife, and Elana was honestly glad when they arrived at the mess the Jawas had left behind. She stared at the Mandalorian's gutted ship as they slowly neared, the blurrg swaying steadily. As soon as they stopped in front of it, the Mandalorian and Kuiil jumped off the sled and started to inspect the state that the ship was in.

"There is no way we're gonna get this to work without a full maintenance facility," the Mandalorian stated, staring up at his ship, shoulders slumped.

Elana refused to feel bad about the defeated tone in his voice, knowing that as soon as the ship was repaired, they would head off to Nevarro. Kuiil lifted a tool bag out of the sled, and started to heave it towards the ship.

"This is gonna take days to fix," the Mandalorian sighed, looking around.

"If you care to help, it might go faster," Kuiil said, and set the bag down, handing a part to the Mandalorian, "There is much work to do." The Mandalorian just sighed again, and took the offered part. Then, he walked over to the Razor Crest, and started to fiddle with something on the landing gear. Kuiil nodded approvingly, before looking at her.

"What about Elana?" Kuiil asked loudly, and the Mandalorian looked over his shoulder.

"She looks after the quarry," was his response, "He should be waking up soon."

Elana stared hard at him, both for his assumption that she could not help, that she was only good for keeping an eye on Bean, and for the condescending tone he had used. Blowing out air in annoyance, she folded her legs, sat up straight, and simply watched them start work on the ship. Bean made a soft noise, and Elana looked at him, but the hope rising in her chest was quickly crushed when there was still not a single nudge over the bond. She sighed heavily, heart feeling like it was breaking into two. This just keeps getting worse.

After an hour of them working, Kuiil looked up at the sky and announced: "It is late, we will need to get sleep if we are to continue this."

The Mandalorian made a noise in protest. "We have good momentum right now," he said, stalking around the corner where he had been repairing a part of the ramp.

"We will continue tomorrow," Kuiil said decidedly, and set down his tools, walking over to the sledge, "I will take the blurrg and head to my farm. The sledge can stay here. I have spoken."

Elana watched as the Ugnaught pressed a few buttons, and the sledge disengaged with a hiss. "I shall return. Good night."

"Good night," the Mandalorian sighed.

Elana simply nodded at him, and Kuiil gave a small smile that was probably meant to be encouraging. Patting the side of the blurrg with his foot several times, the creature turned with a loud huff, and started to waddle off in the direction of Kuiil's farm.

"Has he woken up?" The Mandalorian asked when the Ugnaught was some distance away. Elana tensed, a breath escaping her as fear coursed through her veins, and she forced herself to look at the bounty hunter, unwilling to show weakness.

"No," she answered, barely stopping herself from glaring at him, "I don't know when he will."

He said nothing, but his shoulders dropped almost imperceptibly. The only reason Elana noticed it was because she was looking at them to avoid looking into his face.

"Have you eaten?" Elana asked, and cursed herself in the same moment, the question slipping out almost without her noticing. He was quiet, just looking at her.

"No," he said after a short while. Elana frowned, and tugged her rucksack close.

"Here," she said, pulling two ration bars out, and tossing them to him, "I don't think you've eaten since before yesterday."

The Mandalorian tilted his helmet at her. "I didn't think you noticed," he said, and his voice held a tone she could not place. Was it mocking? Defensive? Or something different?

She resisted the urge to scoff at him, and explained instead: "You don't eat regularly. When you're in company, you don't eat, that's not healthy." He said nothing, and Elana felt herself become indignant, some part in her unable to comprehend why a grown man would just forgo food, especially a bounty hunter like him. "Is it normal that you simply don't eat? What species are you, can you store food over long periods?"

He did not answer, but his fingers curled around the ration packets.

"And all that Jawa business, I don't think you ate then either? I'm sorry if I'm overstepping but that doesn't seem healthy."

"I had some stims before I went to get the egg," he muttered.

Elana raised an eyebrow, staring at him. "You mean to tell me that you went to fight a Mudhorn with no food, no water, only some stims?"

"I had water," he corrected.

"That does not improve your situation," Elana said, crossing her arms, "Do you have a death wish or are you just acting like it?"

He tilted his helmet at her, and the amount of annoyance he could convey without saying a single word was astonishing.

"You know, running on stims is not--"

"Are you the baby's caretaker or mine?" The Mandalorian asked dryly.

Elana glared at him. "Seems like I have to, if you're stupid enough to fight a Mudhorn on stims."

"Cut the sass," The Mandalorian growled, stepping closer, towering above her.

"Make me," she snarled without thinking, scooting back until her back hit the spare parts on the sledge, curling a protective arm around the sleeping Bean.

He seemed to realise that he was too close, and backed off without a word, hand clenched around the ration bars. Elana got out the water bottle, and set it on the edge of the sledge by reaching forwards, and leaned back as soon as the metal bottle was standing safely. The Mandalorian gave her a nod, and she glared at him in response, feeling the fear of him starting to take over again.

"Thank you," he said, before turning around, disappearing behind the Razor Crest.

Elana scrunched her nose at him, took out a ration for herself and bit into it viciously while cursing the Mandalorian in her mind. Cursing him for being an asshole. Cursing him for being their captor. Cursing him because she could do nothing but curse and hope for some kind of escape. Cursing him because Bean would not wake up.

When he finally came back, he handed her a noticeably lighter water bottle, but she did not comment. Without looking at the Mandalorian, she took out a clean shirt of hers, carefully poured water on it, and opened Bean's mouth. She made him suck on the fabric so he could at least get some moisture without the risk of choking on the water. Repeating the process a few times, the little one instinctively drinking, she sighed in relief when Bean smiled in his sleep, and cuddled closer to her, ignoring the Mandalorian who watched her. He is all right, she told herself, and put a kiss onto the baby's forehead.

"Can you move the pram?" Elana requested after gathering the courage to open her mouth, and the Mandalorian gave a start.

"Of course," he rasped out, and manoeuvred the pod right next to her. She put Bean into it carefully, and tucked the blankets into his side, keeping him warm. Then, closing the pram with a press of the button, she sighed. Taking the water bottle, Elana drank the rest of the water herself, grimacing at how there was not enough left for how dry her throat felt.

Turning the moisture bead on, she slumped into herself, feeling the days catching up on her. She was unbelievably tired. "Were the Jawas happy? When you gave them the egg?" Elana asked, thoughts far away, eyes on the stars above them.

The Mandalorian gave something that could have been an amused huff. "Yeah," he said, "Yelled a lot again."

"Suga," Elana quoted quietly, shaking her head, somehow missing the little robed creatures. They have been strange, but kind in the end, careful with their treatment of them.

"Suga," the Mandalorian agreed, derision in his voice, "If I never have to deal with them again it would be too soon." Elana suppressed a snort and blamed it on how tired she was instead of the sarcastic note in his voice. "Good night," she told him after a while in silence, and turned around, back facing him. He said nothing for a long time, but she heard him perfectly when he said "Night" back, voice crackling through the vocoder.

When Elana awoke the next day, the Ugnaught was just arriving, jumping down from his blurrg mount, the creature giving a low purr.

"Good morning," Kuiil said, patting the bag he had on his side, "I brought breakfast."

Elana sat up, rubbing her hands over her face, and yawned. "Thank you," she told Kuiil, smiling through another yawn. The Mandalorian was already up and fiddling with his broken chestplate. Elana stared at the wiring that was visible, and marvelled at how intricately it was built into the armour. It was exquisite craftsmanship even without the technical gadgets surrounding it, and she suddenly understood how he was able to regulate his temperature on a desert planet without difficulties.

She was envious of it and was not even able to deny it. Elana brought herself into an upright position, walking on her knees to the pram, and checking on Bean. Her heart sank. He was still sleeping, nothing changed. Bean must not even have moved much during the night. Kuiil set down his bag and pulled out three mugs and plates, as well as a big thermos, packets of instant bread and a few cacti fruits.

"We can eat here while you can eat on the ship," Kuiil told the Mandalorian, who nodded at him.

"Thanks. It's very kind of you," he said, taking the portion from him and waiting for Kuiil to unscrew the thermos, who then poured a generous amount of caf into the mug, and left for the ship. The Ugnaught settled down on the sledge as well, and poured the rest of the caf into their respective mugs.

Starting to nibble at one of the cacti fruits, Elana propped a knee up, resting her arm on it. "I'm hoping we're not eating all of your food," she said to Kuiil, "I would hate to be a burden to you."

"You are my guests, and I am therefore in your service," Kuiil responded, "I can assure you, you are not a burden."

"Why are you helping the Mandalorian?" Elana asked after hesitating for a while,

The Ugnaught sighed. "There is no peace on Arvala-7. There are always bounty hunters arriving, without fail, all seeking the same bounty."

Elana frowned, looking at him in a mixture of sympathy and confusion.

"This little child has caught the eye of some high-up Imperial, if I had to guess," Elana felt her blood run cold at the confirmation of her fears, "And they will not stop until they get what they want."

Imperials.

It was not the first time that her mind had wandered since they had left the encampment. She had been thinking about every one who could want them, who could have enough money to keep the bounty hunters coming. It could have been some crazy collector, it could have been Bean's parents, it could have also been fanatic remnants of the Empire who wanted the child for his powers. Kuiil just confirmed what she had feared the most, and Elana was struggling to comprehend it.

"I want my valley to know peace," Kuiil said, looking imploringly at her, brows furrowed, "And peace will only come when the bounty hunters stop."

Elana looked at Bean, who was snoring peacefully. "And you are willing to have peace in exchange of an innocent child?" Elana asked, voice barely above a whisper.

"I did not say that," he sighed, "But it is not in my hands anyways. The Mandalorian has claimed him as his bounty, and it is in his hands now."

"You could help us," she whispered, looking him straight in his eyes, desperate, "you could help us escape."

Kuiil shook his head. "Even if I wanted to, and I do, I cannot. My farm would be the first place the Mandalorian would look for you, and the end result would be the same."

"So you're just letting him take us away?" Elana hissed, feeling anger rise in her, "You would sacrifice Bean for the sake of your valley?"

He looked at her evenly, an unspoken grief lingering behind his eyes that made her pause. "Where are you from, Elana?" Kuill suddenly asked.

"Alderaan," she answered, "What does that have to do with anything?"

The Ugnaught hummed. "If a choice had to be made, between Alderaan or your princess, which one would you have chosen?"

Elana reared back, mouth dropping open. "This is nothing close to it," she pressed out between gritted teeth, eyes shooting daggers at him.

"Is it not? A place to keep safe and a person to sacrifice. Would you have sacrificed your princess if it meant that Alderaan would have survived?"

"That is a vile thing to ask, Kuiil." Eyes blinking fast, she refused to let the tears collect, refused to let him see how he had struck a nerve.

"I'm just hoping that you can understand my point. Both options are wretched, but if it was between a valley I protect and a child I do not know--"

She jumped up, furious, "Don't you dare finish that sentence!" Elana yelled, burning up in rage, "You don't get to make that decision!" Kuiil looked at her, wise eyes that saw straight into her soul stripping every layer she had away.

"Listen here, Ugnaught," she snarled, "I will do anything to protect Bean, I don't care if this entire planet burns! He deserves to grow up, not being experimented on by Imperials for the rest of his life!"

"If you would condemn an entire planet to burn, you would give up many that are just like him," Kuiil pointed out, raising an eyebrow.

Chest heaving, she stared at him, jaw clenched together. "Thank you for the breakfast," she said as calmly as she could, "I'll leave now." Scooping Bean up in her arms, she started to stalk away.

"Where do you think you are going?" The Mandalorian asked, standing on the ramp of his ship.

"I'm going to get some air," Elana snapped, "Don't worry, you'll be able to find us."

"You're staying here," he commanded, annoyance in his voice

"I don't care," she spat, glaring at him. With those words, she walked further to stew in silence, knowing fully that the reaction she had was childish. But she thought they could cut her some slack, and if they would not?

She would make them.

Clutching Bean close to her, she dropped down on a comfortable rock, with some overhead shelter should she choose to stay away for a longer time, and far away so she would not have to put up with them.

Leaning against the rocky wall, knees bent slightly and Bean snoring on her lap, she did her best to breathe deeply, trying to calm down. "Bean, honey, now would be a good time to wake up, don't you think?" Elana whispered to him, fighting back her tears, "It would be perfect if you would wake up this moment." Bean just let out a rattling snore, making her laugh slightly, burying her face into his belly as her shoulders shook.

"I guess that's fine as well," she huffed, smile watery, "but could you wake up? Please? I worry about you." Letting her fingers trace over his face carefully, over his brows, the wrinkles on his head, the closed eyelids, his cheeks, she sighed. "Why is the bond broken, sweetpea?" Elana asked as if he would answer, staring hard at his little features, "Why can't I feel you now?" There was no response, no answer, not through him stirring or a flicker across the bond.

Elana pulled him close, and closed her eyes, resting her cheek on the top of his head, feeling his weight and warmth on her body, and she tried to let herself be soothed by it. "I miss you, Bean," she whispered, "Please wake up soon. I love you, okay?"

After about half an hour later, the Mandalorian appeared, the water bottle in his hand. "Here," he said, and threw it on the sand next to her feet, along with the shirt she had used yesterday, but tossed that in her lap.

She stared up at him, frowning. "Thanks?" Elana asked, squinting at him, the sun at his back and in her eyes.

"You can stay in the shade if you want to," he offered, gesturing to her.

"Thank you," she said, secretly grateful that he did not expect or want her to help with the repairs in the midday sun. Not that she was the most experienced at it anyways.

"Does the baby need anything else?"

Elana shook her head, "He only needs to wake up."

The Mandalorian was quiet for a moment. "Do you know when he will wake up?"

It did not slip by her how he had deliberately used the word when instead of if, for which Elana was thankful. It was a consideration she did not think he would give her.

"I don't know," she confessed, looking away, and then to Bean, "I hope soon."

After a nod at her, the Mandalorian walked back to the Razor Crest, where Kuiil was currently soldering something. Scowling at the sight of the Ugnaught, she watched the Mandalorian go, the beskar pauldron and his helmet glinting in the sunlight. Sighing to herself, she drank some water, and gave Bean a bit as well. Were her eyes deceiving her or did Bean drink more water today? Was he dehydrated or was he starting to wake up? But despite her hopes, he did not open his beautiful dark eyes that day.

Or the day after.

On the fifth day after the Mudhorn incident, Elana was starting to go crazy. She had managed not to burst into tears in front of Kuiil and the Mandalorian, but they could probably still tell when she had cried, or tried to hide it. She was grateful for them not mentioning a word when she started to help with the rebuilding of the Mandalorian's ship, despite being below average at it. If Bean had been awake, she probably would not have helped at all, trying to prolong the time between them leaving Arvala-7 and getting to the suspected Imperial client. But doing nothing was driving her mad. Completely, utterly mad with worry over the small baby, and the only times when that worry was lifted from her shoulders was when she was neck deep into wiring and parts and tools.

They did not comment, and she gritted her teeth, checking on Bean every hour, getting more jittery the longer he stayed asleep.

When she woke with puffy red eyes, the only thing the Mandalorian would do was hand her the water bottle along with a ration pack, T-visor turned away from her in a resemblance of privacy. Kuiil had let them use his sonic washing machine as well, so the days were actually the most bearable since the encampment, with clean clothes, regular food and water breaks, and enough time to sleep.

But they were still hell for Elana.

When finally, after almost seven days of silence over the bond, something flickered across it, Elana dropped the part she was holding without preamble, and rushed to the pram, kneeling in front of it.

Bean was starting to stir.

Bean was starting to stir!

He started to frown, flailing his limbs around, fingers flexing, nose twitching. Elana did not think, just got him out of the pram, and sat down on her heels. She put him on her lap, and waited with bated breath. The green child started to whine lowly, scrunching his eyes shut even more before slowly blinking up at her. She laughed, smile watery and eyes misty. "Bean!" Elana gasped, pulling him close to her, squishing him in her arms, "You're awake!"

"Mwa," he told her, voice a bit raspy, and raised his little claws to her face. Crying in joy, she pressed their foreheads against each other, relishing in the way the bond suddenly opened wide. It was as if a tidal wave of power rushed over her, the beautiful, familiar and dearly missed sensation of their minds connecting with each other. Knowing exactly what he felt right now, his own relief mingled with hers.

"Oh, Bean," she told him, voice thick, "oh, sweetpea, honey, the best baby in the whole galaxy--" Elana showered him with kisses while he giggled under the onslaught, and she felt as if the entire weight of the world was dropped off her shoulders at once. Repeating his name as if it were a prayer, she pressed their foreheads together again, his little hands patting at where her face was wet from her tears.

"Mwa," he cooed, giggling brightly when she playfully scrunched her nose at him, ears pointing high. He turned his head towards something behind her, and made a loud happy noise, his face lighting up with a bright smile. Elana followed his gaze and saw the Mandalorian standing there, watching them.

"He's awake!" Elana beamed at the bounty hunter, too relieved to care about her dislike and fear of the man.

He tilted his helmet slightly. "I can see that," he said, and he sounded like he was smiling. Bean cooed loudly, clearly excited to see the Mandalorian, wriggled in her hold and tried to get to him. Elana released the baby from her grip, and watched as the bundle of brown robes made his way to the Mandalorian, trilling at him in exhilaration. It was hilarious to see the big bounty hunter stumbling back from the little bean on the ground, trying to avoid the overeager baby.

Searching the bond, Elana realised why Bean was so excited. "He is happy to see you. He was not sure if he had saved you in time," she spoke, looking at the Mandalorian, "He thought the Mudhorn got you."

Deftly avoiding Bean trying to grab his boot, the Mandalorian stared at her. "He's happy to see me?" He sounded dumbfounded, T-visor whipping down to where Bean had succeeded in catching his shoe, and cooed up at him.

"Obviously," Elana said, unable to make her voice dry in the light of Bean's happiness. The Mandalorian sighed deeply, shoulders slumping as the baby tightened his hold on his leg even more, completely enamoured with the man.

Kuiil appeared, pulling his goggles off and setting them on top of his head. "I'm glad the child awoke," he said, smiling at the overexcited Bean.

Bean's tummy made a loud grumble at that moment, and he turned his head, frowning up at her, patting the offending area while whining. Elana could not help her laugh at his face. The Mandalorian sighed again, and she knelt next to him, carefully prying Bean away. She placed him on her hip, and Elana beamed at being able to do the familiar motion again. "We'll get you something to eat, sweetpea, don't you worry," she told him, and made her way past the Mandalorian and the Ugnaught, towards the makeshift table with ration bars and jerky on it.

As soon as she had a packet in her hand, Bean reached out, took it, and bit into it with the packaging still on. Whining again, looking up at her with big watery eyes and a pout on his lips, he patted his tummy once more. She quickly removed the packaging and watched as he tucked in, eating the whole bar in two bites.

"Do you want more?" Elana asked, and when he reached out to the pile again, she set him on the ground carefully before getting another bar, opening it for him. In the end it took three ration bars and a jerky strip before the baby gave a satisfied burp, and after some gulps of water, he waddled to her, buried his face in her stomach and cooed.

"I missed you too, Bean," Elana murmured, rubbing the small one's back soothingly, "Don't scare me like that again, all right?"

……………

Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it!

Huge shout out to @mndalorians for smoothing over everything and both dealing with my grammar and general nonsense (like our discourse with @teaofpeach today lmao)

Tags: @binggrae-banana-milk @b0n-chann @pisss-offf-ghostt @chibi-liz05 @din-damn-djarin @soldade @yourexcellentboiiii @chaotic-noceur @ezrasarm @hdlynn @mndalorians @over300books @agirllovespancakes @crookedmoonsaultpunk @teaofpeach @shadylightbearherring @mitchi-c @concussed-to-pieces @adikaofmandalore @buckythewhitewolfx @thirstworldproblemss

[futurestaresback]

hypmic kny!au headcanons because nobody asked for it!!!

i wrote this au at like 1am but i like how it turned out, so i'm posting it here :D

some kny spoilers ahead(?)

buster bros

• ichiro is the First Pillar/壱の柱 ((wow thats badass))

• he uses breath of the sun change my mind (though he started out with breath of water)

• his weapon: a katana with a red hilt. there's an omamori on it that says one, or ichi

• as expected, jiro has two omamori (ichiro's one + his own) while saburo has three (all of them)

• jiro uses breath of water come on it fits with his image color (and poor boi probs never mastered another breathing technique that's why)

• however, he's actually very proficient at it -- he knows all the forms and can perform them at any given time. only downside? due to his nonexistentCOUGH i mean insufficient knowledge of kanji, he doesn't know how to read the names of most of the forms and can't yell his attacks like a badass

• saburo? thunder breathing. he's not physically as strong as his older brothers (yet), so he relies on his agility and speed to boost his attacks

• jiro and saburo are training to be ichiro's tsuguko, and they squabble about it a shit ton (much to ichiro's disappointment), but oh boy in a fight the three of them are deadly

• especially if ichiro is injured in some way. jiro and saburo will literally show no mercy to whoever was unfortunate enough to have done it

mad trigger crew

• samatoki is the skull pillar/髑髏柱

• wooooo again with the badass names

• i just thought of this but OK WHAT IF HE BECAME A DEMON SLAYER TO PROTECT DEMON!NEMU???

• because in canon he became a yakuza for her sake and nemu was brainwashed by chuuouku so

• omg

• ok anyways samatoki's breathing style is skull breathing, which he invented himself

• even though he's a demon slayer, he's not exactly,,, sociable. he's irritable, stubborn, and just smokes on a kiseru during pillar meetings

• ((but he's actually a huge softie under all of that, especially if his sister is involved))

• jyuto. he probably uses his own breathing style too, but as for weapons... he uses a pistol

• he literally has the kanji for "gun" in his name ofc he would

• since this is the taisho era, western-style pistols would still have been relatively new so jyuto is feared as much as he's respected for his proficiency of his weapons

• would totally confront any demon he meets by saying "HAI STOP STOP STOP"

• rio?? survival breathing

• ok sorry but seriously he'd use his own breathing style too

• i think it'd be mostly centered around strengthening endurance and prologing survival time in dire situations (underwater, in a fire, trapped in an airtight space, etc) rather than attack

• and where does survival cooking come in, you ask?

• it's still there. but the ingredients are demons

• i headcanon that just like genya, he can eat demons to temporarily gain some of their attributes, and he insists on sharing his cooking with everyone, but (naturally) is usually met with stiff resistance

• mostly by jyuto

fling posse

• ramuda is... the candy pillar/飴柱

• don't be fooled by the innocent name; he's actually one of the deadliest pillars because unlike the others who wield swords, his preferred type of weapon is poison

• he has to use that, because physically he lacks the strength to decapitate a demon (kinda like shinobu really)

• another similarity they share? from a young age, he's been trained to intake wisteria poison into his body, and started a habit of eating candy with that to make the pain a little more bearable (which is how he got the "candy pillar" title)

• over the years, he's accumulated enough toxicity in his body that even the poison on his breath has become lethal to demons if they're exposed to it in close contact

• which is why he loves to get close and clingy with people

• when an enemy really ticks him off, though, he'll snap and immediately resort to methods... quicker in effect than poison

• a swift slit to their throat with the small dagger he keeps in his haori sleeve usually does the trick, he finds

• gentaro isn't a pillar, but oh god if he was they'd call him the uso hashira

• he's always shrouded in this aura of mystery and never gives straight answers to anyone

• especially dice

• gentaro is light for his height, so like ramuda, i headcanon he's not very suited for wielding a katana like the others either

• however, no one has seen that weapon -- just the book he carries around with him at all times

• if you start to link things together and ask him whether the book is his secret weapon all along, he'll say, "why, yes. i do not need a blade to kill, you see, only words..."

• when you back away in fear he'll chuckle a little and hit you with the "uso desu yo"

• gentaro you little shit

• as for dice, i headcanon him to be a special case

• just like a casino slot machine, his special ability is that he can use any attack from any form of breathing he's learned, with full proficiency and power

• only downside is that,,, he never knows what attack it is exactly

• like he learned a form of sun breathing from observing the buster bros' training and was so excited to try it out against some demon he met but forgot about the randomness of his attacks and accidentally hit them with breath of water first form

• it bounces harmlessly off said demon (to dice's horror)

• (luckily ramuda manages to swoop in and kill them while they're too busy laughing at dice's expression of horror)

• and to nobody's surprise, he slacks off training to gamble, but surprisingly his skill matches theirs despite not having been polished through conventional practice

matenro

• jakurai... oh boy. he's the deity pillar/神柱

• the word "pillar" ("hashira") is the counter for deities in japanese, so this title basically emphasises the fact that jakurai is seen as the living embodiment of a deity

• it's hard not to see him as such, because he's so tall and ethereal and there's a certain grace in everything he does

• plus his specialty (besides swordsmanship) is healing others with his knowledge of medicinal herbs and... his voice. like oyakata-sama, i hc that his voice has the ability to instantly soothe people and put them at ease

• HOWEVER, he is absolutely terrifying on the battlefield. he's silent and deadly, and if you're his enemy he has no pity to spare for you. this assassin-like style of his attacks have been likened to a viper lying in ambush for its prey

• and just like in canon, his personality does a complete 180 when he's drunk

• one time he accidentally mistook a cup of sake for water and the next second he'd ripped off his haori and yeeted doppo through the shoji door

• (he's apologized at least 5 times and doppo says he doesn't have to, but neither of them have really forgotten about it)

• hifumi definitely uses love breathing, like mitsuri

• come on the theme just fits too well and some of the attacks are named after cats... he says it's for his konekochans

• instead of his usual suit, he has a small haori he has to put on in order to get into host mode AND gain more confidence, which upon wearing instantly turns him into a bubbly demon-slaying ladykiller

• would 100% flirt with his opponents before killing them ("oh, kitten, you look simply stunning... such a shame that i'll have to cut you down soon. let's make the most out of the last night of your life then, shall we?")

• he cooks for everyone else occassionally, especially after a long day of training. it's a hobby of his that he isn't afraid to admit

• doppo... this poor boy

• he's a breath of water user, and his rank is... average.

• his weapon is a katana, which is... also average

• basically, people don't see anything special or worth mentioning about him at first glance, which (besides his own pessimism) accounts for doppo's constant gloominess

• his mentor also forces him to train for longer than the other tsuguko and he's also a frequent subject of ridicule, which doesn't help at all

• would 100% be the apologetic attacker type (like he'd apologize if a demon he was meant to slay belittled him)

• he lets his stress out occassionally when he's pushed past a breaking point and boy is he scary when that happens

• is it wrong to imagine that, just like how zenitsu can power up ridiculously while unconscious/asleep, doppo has a "berserk mode" that he can activate when he gets pushed too far

• during which his usual meek, timid personality is all but replaced by his pent up rage that he won't hesitate to let out all at once... pray for whoever's unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end of it

[beautifulterriblequeen]

I saw in the art book that Claudia actually got close to a live unicorn. This is extremely uncommon and plot wise it just doesn’t make sense to me that Claudia would be able to get close to one and have enough knowledge of dark arts to either slay it or take its horn. This whole time I thought the unicorn was already dead before she gets the horn. I hope they interstate this in the plot well, what do you think?

I haven’t gotten the art book, anon, so I can only speculate, but uhhh that doesn’t seem like good news at all. I spent months thinking some pretty dark things about Viren and Claudia in regards to the unicorn, but recently I also dared to hope that maybe the horn was taken (long) after the creature had been killed.

Now it looks like we’re potentially back to the dark theory, huh. Unless it specifies in the book that it’s just a concept and not how she got the horn. I know the art book is full of plenty of gorgeous pictures that didn’t become canon, so possibly that picture is one of them?

Anyway, here’s the dark and oversteeped tea on Claudia and the unicorn: According to legend, unicorns can only be approached by virgins due to their supposedly sweet and innocent nature. Don’t get me started, that’s just what the myth says. And it absolutely lends itself to abuse and hunting, using the virgin as a sort of bait. In TDP, though, Claudia isn’t the bait: she’s the hunter, neither sweet nor innocent when it comes to taking magical lives.

This is the dark path Claudia’s been on all along, although this is a particularly shadowed step. Like her father, she doesn’t believe that life has any intrinsic value. It’s only worth what you can use it for--whether you’re collecting magical creatures for spells, 

wringing secrets out of prisoners,

or spending your own energy and life force to save your loved ones. 

She values humans over magical creatures, but she’s also puzzled that Harrow wants to keep his own body when assassins are on their way to stab it. “Whatever it takes” is very much a pragmatic viewpoint, and it’s one that she’s absorbed early and well from her father.

It’s an imperfect mirror of how Runaan tried to teach Rayla to be hard enough to do whatever it takes, except that Claudia actually learned the lesson, and Rayla didn’t. I’d say it’s Ethari’s fault but it’s not a fault, he did good.

Claudia’s journey is probably going to get much darker before she finds a point at which she feels lost enough to want to look for a new path. I’m kinda reminded of the glowy cave she took Soren to: they got lost until she turned off even her magic hand light. Only then, in pitch darkness, could she see a subtle new way to move forward.

At some point, Claudia will have to come to terms with what she’s done to those around her. Like her dad, she’ll probably leave a trail of destruction mixed with good intentions. And somewhere--I really hope--she’ll find a line she’s not willing to cross. Maybe she’ll have Callum in her crosshairs, or Soren, or even Viren. I hope she can find her way to the understanding that if she stays on this path, the suffering will never, ever end. Not for those around her, and not for her, either.

It could break her, realizing that everyone she’s hurt and killed was just as real as she is. But maybe she can get put back together again, by the people who never forgot that she’s as real as they are, too.

[petri808]

Awaken the Sleeping Dragon Within

Nalu Canon divergent, would take place after ft 100.  Here you go, I hope you like it!  :)  Lol it ended up longer than I’d expected.

Natsu moves with an extra spring in his step that morning.  The job was a mission complete with no damages and full payment given.  He’d found the perfect gift for Lucy that he’d been searching for and was now on his way back home to Magnolia.  The perfect weather was like a bonus treat that made his travel by foot a pleasant one.

Things had been progressing in their change of relationship status.  Through the whole 100-year quest, the shining revelation was not only that their bond could never be broken, but one that transcends the lines of simple friendship.  When he’d said ‘together forever’ it was a phrase uttered from the heart towards a person he knew he’d always want to be around.  But now he fully understood what it had meant, and it was time to solidify that phrase.  To take it from mere words to action and the gift he held in his pocket would do just that.

It would be another half-day’s journey to Magnolia, which meant he’d have to sleep under the stars one more evening.  Natsu didn’t mind so much.  As long as he could see them, they reminded him of Lucy, and that made him feel less lonely without her at his side.  The roads were quiet considering the holidays were so close in time.  Natsu remembers passing very few travelers, and in the last several hours, none at all.  Yet it was strange that he’d felt eyes watching him on a few occasions.

Just before nightfall, Natsu makes camp just off the side of the road in the first clear area he could find.  He sets up his bedroll, a small campfire, and eats dinner before lying down to get some rest.  The sooner he falls asleep, the faster the morning will come, and it doesn’t take long for mister sandman to come a calling.

There was little warning than a downward draft of air from above bringing with it…

‘What the hell?!’

Natsu jumps to his feet, awoken from a sound sleep by the scent of his brother blasting his senses.  He barely has a chance to dive away and block as a stream of fire burns his belongings to a charred pile and blackens the ground where he had just been occupying.

“Ignia!!!” He screams at the dragon hovering above. “What the fuck is your problem?!”  He was tired of these surprise attacks.  Four times now, but he was glad this time Lucy wasn’t around to be caught in the middle.  The last one… she’d almost been burned.

But Ignia simply bellows a guttural laugh and sends another blast of fire at Natsu in response.

The slayer dodges stream after stream of fire sent his way, lobbing blasts of his own the few chances he gets.  Ignia keeps up the volley at breakneck speed causing Natsu to endure a few near misses and a couple of singes.  Oh, this is ridiculous!  What kind of game was Ignia playing with him?!

As soon as Ignia pauses to change his flight pattern, Natsu takes advantage and lights up his feet.  He rockets himself toward his brother, sending his own crackling of flames to overwhelm Ignia long enough to compromise the dragon’s vision.  Then he uses a flame whip to lasso its neck.  Ignia thrashes at the binding, but it’s too late.  It gave Natsu just enough time to pull himself up and grab on to his brothers back, gripping tightly to the scales.  “Dad… and.. uncle Atlas… would be… so.. pissed… at you!”  He scoots up slowly, inching his way to the base of the dragon’s neck.

His brother bucks harder to get him off, free diving and suddenly banking one way or the other, doing anything and everything to throw Natsu off him.  “Fuck them, as if I care!”  He growls. “They did nothing for me and now they’re all dead!”

That pisses Natsu off!  How dare Ignia speak ill of their family!  “And you tarnish all they fought for by fighting me!  Spare me your sob story, I will not let you talk badly about Igneel like that, you selfish asshole!”  He lobs a ball of fire at Ignia’s head.  “Or Atlas!”  Another ball.  “Even he recognized me as Igneel’s son!”

Several more blasts are levied at Ignia’s head.  From this close proximity, the dragon can’t strain his neck far enough to retaliate or get a good hit on his brother, instead taking each one.  His skin may be immune to fire, but it’s effectively irritating.  There’s only one way he can think of to attack back.

He flames up his entire body.

At first Natsu’s screams pierce the dragon’s ears and he grins wide, assuming his brother still couldn’t handle his flames.  Several seconds tick on, but something changes.  Natsu’s screams die out.  Did he kill his brother?  That brings a wider-brimmed smile to his snout.  He grins and cranes his neck as far as it could go, but the sight that greets him quickly sullies his demeanor.

“It won’t work on me anymore… brother.”  Natsu’s own grin brings a great roar from Ignia.  The dragon bucks, but this time Natsu stands firm, holding tight to his flame whip now blue in color.  The slayer was covered in his brothers flames from head to toe!  The initial flame on had surprised him, hence the scream, but Natsu was able to slurp it up and take it in.

“You’ve learned to control it?!”  Ignia screams.  “I am a dragon god!  How can a mere human handle my flame?!”

Their last fight had hardened Natsu’s resolve to beat his brother once and for all.  It wasn’t a matter of choice, he needed to gain control over the flames to protect his loved ones.  Ignia didn’t need to know all the pain he’d endured to master this ability, but he will see the results.    

The longer he continues to soak up his brother’s flames, the more changes morph along his body.  Scales over his extremities and around his face.  Sharper claw-like nails and elongated canines.  Leathery wings with horn spiked joints and finally, serpentine pupils.  He was still humanoid, a hybrid of both worlds.  “Because I am no mere human.”  Natsu’s voice is low and full of pride.  “I’m a demon and the son of the Fire Dragon King!  For the sake of our father’s honor, I do not wish to fight you, but I will if you continue to threaten me or those I love!”

Ignia wanted to defeat his brother, but he wasn’t a fool either.  He could sense the gathering strength flowing through Natsu and the threat was not baseless.  This slayer or whatever he was, was not only on par with him power for power, but possibly even more so.  There was a strange feeling to Natsu’s energy…  ‘Tch, it’s that stupid love shit again!’  Ignia vaguely remembers his brother spouting nonsense about strength from family, friends, or something like that.  

“Well, brother?” Natsu narrows his eyes and concentrates his flames towards his hands, pooling, and growing balls of fire around them.  “Fight or live?”

“You’re bluff!”

Before Ignia finishes his retort, Natsu sends one ball, hitting his brother in the eye.  His fire, combined with his brothers explodes like white-hot shrapnel, burning through scale.  If Ignia hadn’t closed his eye soon enough, he would have been blinded.  

The dragon shrieks in pain, tossing his head from side to side to shake off the burning sensation.  It was unbelievable to Ignia that any fire could burn a fire dragon!  And one from this damn slayer!    

“I’ve come a long way,” Natsu reiterates, “there is nothing I won’t endure to protect.”

“Get off of me!” Ignia screams.  “Alright!  I’ll leave and go back to Guiltina!”

Natsu takes flight, hovering above and to the side of his brother.  “Don’t come back to Fiore, Ignia or I will not hold back!  I will slay you as we were originally conscripted to do!”  

The dragon blows out a puff of steam and without another word takes off towards the clouds.  Whether Ignia keeps his word or not will remain unseen, but for now, it was over.  Natsu looks down at the area he was sleeping in and remembers that his bedroll and backpack were destroyed, leaving him nothing to rest on.  He groans.  It was still a few hours till dawn, but with the wings, he could make it back to his cottage by morning.  He didn’t like staying in this form for so long because it drained his energy, but it might be better than sleeping on the hard ground.  ‘I’ll just sleep when I get home…’

It was a loud banging on his front door that rouses Natsu from another dead sleep.  “Come… coming…” He stumbles off the couch, wiping at the crusted drool on his cheek and chin.  His body ached all over, not painful, just sore, like every muscle was on strike and his vision was foggy.  His side bumps into the counter while trying to steady his wobbling gait.  “Oww!” Natsu grabs his side.  He looks down at where the pain was coming from and sees a large healing burn.  It was only then that his mind snaps together enough to focus and starts to inspect the rest of his body.  The burn was the worst injury he could see, but his top and vest were ripped or torn and barely hanging on his body, pants singed and tattered in a couple areas.    

Another loud bang on the door followed by a woman’s voice.  “Natsu?!  Are you in there?!!”  “He was supposed to be back by now,” the woman speaks in a lower tone as if turned away to another person.

Natsu shakes his head, even his hearing was fogged up, and his sense of smell.  That fight, nay, the transformation and holding it for hours is what zapped his reserves.  He could barely remember making it home.  The voice sure sounded like Lucy’s.  

Now a male voice.  “Are you sure?  Maybe the job ran late.”  

“But tomorrow is Christmas,” the woman replies, “he promised to be home by then.”

Wait a minute!  Natsu whips his head towards the door.  “Christmas?” he mumbles.  That means he’s been asleep for 3 days!  “Christmas?!”  He pushes away from the counter, trips over his own feet, but manages to grab hold of the doorknob, yanking it open.  “Lucy?!”

“Natsu?!”  She rushes up, throwing herself into his body, wrapping her arms tightly around him.  “Where the hell have you been?!  I’ve been so worried!”

“I…”

She pushes off to take a better look.  Immediately, Lucy’s joy at seeing her partner turns to a new range of emotions, going from happiness to sadness to anger in the span of nanoseconds.  “Oh, my Mavis!  What the hell happened to you?!!”

“Aannd, this is where I take my leave,” Gray takes a few steps back.  Natsu was confirmed alive, but now was in another level of trouble.  “See ya guys later.”  He makes a swift exit, leaving the rest to Lucy to deal with.  A lover’s quarrel was not something he was going to get in the middle of.

“Was it the mission?  Did something go wrong?  Who did this to you?!”  Lucy fires question after question in rapid succession, matching the speed at which her mind was flying in that moment.  Natsu was a total mess.  His singed and torn clothing was one thing but the large wound on his side was of a bigger concern.  She should run to get Wendy, but first, demanded answers!  Just as Lucy was about to lay into him with more questions, Natsu swoons on his feet.  His legs were buckling from exhaustion.  Lucy swings his arm over her shoulder to steady him and drags him back to his couch.  She brings him a glass of water, then when he finishes the drink, kneels in front of him.

Lucy takes a deep breath.  She was furious over being worried half to death but knew a fight wouldn’t accomplish anything.  Instead she places her hand upon his knee, looks up, and in a softened tone, “Spill it Natsu.  Tell me what happened.”

So, he does, starting from when Ignia attacked to flying all the way home after the fight, leaving out no details.  “I barely remember getting home or even passing out on the couch three days ago.  The dragon mode took a toll on my body.  I’m so sorry Luce, I never meant to worry you!  All I had wanted to do was…”  Natsu’s eyes widen, the gift!  He’d forgotten all about it!  Did it survive the flames?!  He reaches into his pocket and pulls the small box out.  Its packaging seemed okay, but as he opens it, Natsu’s heart sinks.  The metal ring of the band was melted and warped.  “Fuck!” He closes the cover and lifts his arm to throw it.

“Wait!” Lucy stops him, grabbing his arm and reaching for the box.  “Don’t!  What is that?”

“It was your Christmas gift,” Natsu’s head sinks, and his eyes fall to the floor.  “But it’s ruined.”

She was still trying to process the fight with Ignia and now this gift added another element to the mix.  Lucy wasn’t sure if she should be upset, or just happy that he’d become so powerful, because that growth had saved his life.  How about both?  “Next time Natsu, when there’s something important like this, you should talk to me about it.  I shouldn’t have to find out by surprise that you had trained to wield his fire or that you can control your dragon form.”

“I know…” he sighs.

Lucy sighs too, squeezing his knee.  “I’m annoyed… but I’m also excited that you’re home now and safe.”  She smiles, “I’ll help you get cleaned up, and go get Wendy to heal your wound, okay?”

“Gah!  I feel so bad, I don’t even have a Christmas gift for you now.”

She chuckles and waves her hand, “I don’t need a gift.  It’s the thought that counts, and besides, maybe it’s still repairable.”

Natsu grabs her hand, “it’s not… just a ring.  Lucy, I…. I was planning on proposing to you tomorrow.”

“Wait, what?”  Lucy pauses in shock, but quickly regains her thought process.  She starts to laugh, bringing a look of confusion to Natsu’s face, like his girlfriend has just lost her mind.  “I’m sorry for laughing,” she chuckles again, “Natsu a ring isn’t important.”  Her eyes crinkle in a smile.  “If you want to ask me, then just ask me.  You can fix the ring later if you still want to.”

“Really?!” That brings a wide-brimmed smile back to Natsu’s face.  “Wait,” he tilts his head, “is this a trick question?”  

That sends Lucy into another round of hysterics.  “No!” she laughs, “I’m serious!”

He pouts, “but I wanted to do the whole show, get down on one knee and stuff like they do in your books.”

Lucy smiles from his cute gesture and caresses his cheek, “then I shall wait as well to say yes…”

[carnistcervine]

Aang and Raava are Separate AU

(AU name WIP)

So a while ago I saw this art. And I was like, d’aww. Then it inspired me to make this AU, and I’ve finally written out all the ideas I have for it.

Lemme just have mah mama Raava ‘kay?

-Quick note for this AU, Raava and Vaatu basically have the same powers. So, she also has an insane spirit laser. And where Vaatu can cause emotional distress to the point of hostility in others, Raava has a pacifying aura. I mean, it's possible that Raava also has these abilities in canon, but if she does, she doesn't use them.

-Raava could already sense a grave danger looming over the horizon when Sozin left Roku to die.

-However she remained idle as Aang was born into the world.

-Unlike Aang, she noticed the subtle changes in the people of the Fire Nation, however, once again she did not interfere.

-Raava has been idle since Wan's eventual death, and the world had managed to get along without her direct interference.

-So when Aang runs away and ends up frozen solid, it's a wake-up call for Raava.

-When Aang and Appa sink below the waves, she becomes desperate, her Avatar is about to die before he can complete his destiny. She cannot allow this. Raava takes over freezing a sphere of air around them, she curls around her Avatar and expends her power sending him and his friend into stasis.

-Raava watches over Aang for a hundred years. She would be with him for all his lifetimes...

-When Katara comes across the globe that rose from the water, she doesn't notice the creepy white spirit also trapped in the ice. But Sokka sees it. He tries to stop her from freeing whatever monster was trapped in there, but Katara doesn't notice the strange flatworm-kite-thing until it's too late and it's forcing it's tendrils through the cracks in the ice.

-Seeing an opportunity, Raava uses the cracks in the ice Katara created to break the icy sphere open completely, and a burst of light is sent into the sky, signalling the Avatar's return.

-Katara remembers Gran Gran's tales of spirits who set traps for wanderers out in the icy wastes and worries that she may have accidentally doomed herself and her brother. However, the spirit that pops out of the ice seems more concerned with a young boy it has cradled in it's tendrils. It lays him down gently in the snow, telling him to rest easy.

-When the spirit turns towards his sister, Sokka steps into action, he points his spear at the thing, telling his sister to stay back. That they don't know what this creature is capable of. The spirit casually knocks Sokka's weapon aside and rests a tendril on his shoulder, telling him to take it easy. Sokka can't help but feel oddly drowsy from the contact, like a soft blanket had been draped over his mind.

-Katara asks the spirit who it is. The spirit introduces herself as Raava, the spirit of light and peace. Raava asks Katara if she's a waterbender, Katara confirms that yes she is. So Raava asks if she'd be willing to teach the Avatar, gesturing to Aang.

-Katara explains that she's untrained and that she's the last waterbender in the south pole.

-A fact that worries Raava.

-Raava vouches to see that both Aang and Katara are trained. She asks Katara to take them back to her village and Katara obliges, much to a still sleepy Sokka's chagrin.

-Raava loads Aang onto the bison and Katara and Sokka get on as Appa wakes up. Raava glides along side the bison as Katara leads them to the village. As they get closer, Raava takes on a human looking form and carries Aang in her arms. It's been her personal experience that humans tend to react better to other humans than to faceless spirits.

-None of the villagers ask who this strange woman is, they simply assume that she's the mother of the child she has in her arms.

-Raava watches over Aang as he sleeps. When he wakes up, he feels a vague familiarity at Raava, but doesn't know who she is. She tells him flat out that she's the one known as the Avatar Spirit.

-When Katara introduces Aang and Raava to the village. Raava can't help but feel concerned about how sparse it is. Also, she doesn't introduce herself as a spirit, she simply introduces herself as Raava. The villagers are not only surprised to see an airbender, but also someone as regal looking as Raava.

-Of course, immediately on Raava's docket is going straight to the North Pole so Katara and Aang can learn waterbending. But Aang wants to go penguin sledding with Katara. Being a spirit, Raava is intimately familiar with the fact that they are actually on a deadline and doom is imminent. But even Raava must relent to Aang's incurable puppy face.

-Raava stays behind in the village, learning more specific details about the 100 years war and the stripping of the South Pole.

-Then the whole thing with Aang booby-ing right into a trap happens.

-Sokka banishes Aang from the village, Katara demands to go with him and Raava feels like it's about damn time for them to get on the road.

-Unlike Aang, Raava has no qualms about splitting up Katara's family.

-Then Zuko attacks Katara's tribe and the trio rush back to help.

-Raava steps up to stop Zuko, and Zuko assumes that she's the Avatar. She corrects him, telling him that she's close to the Avatar, but not him.

-She can see the strings of fate that attach Zuko to Aang, so she lets him off easy, grabbing him and using her pacifying aura to make him take a nap. Only saying that he looked like he needed one.

-Iroh is naturally worried for his nephew, but Raava assures him that Zuko is only sleeping and will be back to normal as soon as he wakes up.

-Skipping ahead a bit~

-For the most part, Raava keeps her true nature hidden. Pretending to be a human woman. As no one alive knows who Raava is, it works like a charm.

-Aang is still captured by Zhao when Sokka and Katara get sick, and Zuko does do his Blue Spirit thing trying to rescue him. But also Raava is goddamn pissed and levels half the damn fortress while the duo escape.

-Quick note about Raava, she calls herself a spirit of peace, but she's technically the spirit of order and goes from 0 to 10,000 pretty much instantly. So yeah, she's less an embodiment of peace, and more an enforcer of it.

-They get to the North Pole much faster than in canon, because Raava doesn't play and is actually able to keep the children on task.

-When Pakku refuses to teach Katara, Raava is fucking PISSED. She cannot believe how selfish he's being. Seriously? He's putting his tribe's stupid culture and traditions above the safety and balance of the world! Katara just stands by, smirking as Raava reveals her true nature and goes off on Pakku. She thoroughly enjoys watching him get dunked on by an ancient spirit.

-Not only does Raava demand that both Katara and Aang are taught combat waterbending, but also healing. She honestly doesn't understand why anyone would be dumb enough to separate the two. 1) The more healers, the better. 2) Having an intimate knowledge of the human body(as would be required by healing) makes you a better fighter.

-Both Zhao and Zuko track the Avatar to the North Pole, but Zhao is forced to hang back until he can gather his fleet to attack the fortress. Zuko just breaks right in and is captured. Raava knows that the North will not have mercy on the Fire Prince and demands that he be released to her custody.

-The northerners correctly deduce that she plans on using the Fire Prince as a teacher for the Avatar.

-Unable to deny the direct order of a greater spirit, Zuko is released into Raava's care. She makes sure to keep him in line and implants suggestions into him that make him question his father and country.

-Obviously he isn't anywhere near ready to turn yet, but the seeds are planted much earlier.

-As for waterbending teaching, the healers welcome Aang with open arms. However, Katara gets it ROUGH from the combat students. Pakku is intentionally harsher than normal on her. He's also super hard on Aang, but Katara gets it double time because she's a girl and because Raava is making him teach her.

-When Zhao eventually comes to the North, not only does Raava decimate his fleet, but she also works with Tui and La to trap him in the spirit world for having the audacity to mess with the spirits.

On a side note, I actually spent some time thinking about this. Now for the story, I kind of picture in my mind that Raava goes full on IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZOR on Zhao's fleet. Now, Raava also attacked the Pohai stronghold, and even though Zhao is a reckless idiot, he's not so reckless that he'd just casually forget something as important as the fact that the spirit hanging around the Avatar has A POWERFUL FUCKING LASER. So I got to thinking, if Zhao knows that Raava has a spirit beam attack, he'd make some kind of counter measure. Now, before Kuvira builds the Avatar world's equivalent of a nuke, there really isn't anything that can counter such an attack. And even then, the spirit canon was never used on either Raava or Vaatu, so even though I'm sure it would hurt them, I have no clue how much.

So, this leaves a dilemma. Because Zhao would not abandon his quest to kill the Moon Spirit. Now, I suppose Zhao could just wait for the Avatar to leave the North Pole, but Zhao is not a patient man. So, do I have Raava just not use her spirit laser at the Pohai fortress? Have it be a surprise muthafucka moment for Zhao? I mean, a giant spirit thrashing about would create just as much damage. Or, ooor- And here's a juicy idea~ Zhao intentionally suppresses information of the full extent of Raava's power(it would be harder to get people to join him if they knew just what they were up against) and simply amasses a larger fleet than in canon. He has no real recourse or counter for Raava's power, but decides that he'll simply use his fleet as a distraction. Keep Raava busy while he fulfills his real goal, slaying the Moon Spirit. Zhao's plan isn't to counter Raava directly, but to simply use his fleet a bait.

After all, what better bait than fresh meat?

-Of course, this does bring up that idea... Perhaps Zhao succeeds?

-Oh and in case you were wondering, Ozai was 100% on board with Zhao's idea.

-Skipping ahead some more~

-In Omashu, when facing against the dangerous ladies, Raava proves to be a formidable adversary. Mai's knives harmlessly phase through or bounce off her body. Ty Lee's chi blocking doesn't affect her, and physical contact with the spirit causes Ty Lee to feel the effects of Raava's pacifying aura. Raava's aura, as Ty Lee notes is a brilliant radiance, like looking at the sun.

-And in Azula's case, Raava isn't at all intimidated or swain by her. The spirit is hardly fazed by her blue fire, taking fireballs to the face without so much as a flinch. For the first time in Azula's life she find herself an unstoppable force, meeting an immovable object.

-It's equally frustrating as it is exhilarating.

-Azula's found a worthy opponent.

-For Raava's part, the group are hardly noteworthy. Easily taken down by her pacifying aura. However, Raava knows better than to underestimate an opponent. Fighting someone for eons(like Vaatu) instills these lessons quite firmly. So, she notes whatever things she can about the group, instinctively knowing that this isn't the last she'll see of them.

-Aaand, the swamp. The swamp wants the Gaang to come down and join it. Raava wants the Gaang to join the swamp. The Gaang do not want to join the swamp.

-When the Gaang try to fly over, Raava warns them that they've angered it. She does nothing as the swamp forcefully sucks the group down.

-I'm still deciding whether or not Zhao succeeds in killing Tui... But if he doesn't, instead of encountering a vision of Yue in the swamp, the moon spirit confronts Sokka. With all it's creepy faceless glory.

-As for Aang, he chases down the vision of Toph and runs into Vaatu, or at least a vision of him(or maybe it really is him, I'm leaving this intentionally vague). The spirit shrinks down and forms into a black humanoid shape and reaches out to Aang, who flees in terror.

-Yeah, I'm thinking that overall the Gaang's spirit visions/encounters are much longer, more harrowing, and much much more involved. More like dream sequences/quests than simple visions.

-The swamp is alive, it is a spirit. And spirits are dicks.

-When the group reconvenes, Sokka accuses Raava of terrorizing him. If I have Zhao succeed in killing the Moon Spirit, this scene becomes much more personal with Sokka accusing Raava of using Yue to terrorize him. He's livid with the light spirit, claiming that she used the image of Yue to torment him.

-Of course, Raava did no such thing. But she let's Sokka have his moment, utterly unmoved by his anger. She calmly states that she did no such thing and asks Sokka what possible motivation she could have for doing that.

-Sokka's pissed at Raava for a bit after that, but ultimately accepts that she had nothing to do with what he saw.

-As for Raava herself, she has a vision of Wan.

-Skipping ahead a bit~

-For Toph, Raava is a nightmare. Raava is a spririt, so not only does she not create any vibrations whatsoever, but she also lacks a smell and her voice emanates with no clear direction. Toph never knows when Raava is around, where Raava is, or when Raava is approaching. The only time she knows Raava's there is when she starts speaking.

-She's also completely unable to tell when or if Raava is ever lying.

-Without meaning to, Raava makes Toph feel helpless.

-But that's not all, Toph also hates how demanding Raava is. And poor Toph has no recourse against her. She can't see Raava, so she can't throw any earth her way, and Raava doesn't respond to argument or teasing. At least when Toph is annoyed with Katara, she can call her Sugar Queen and throw mud on her. But deepest of all, Toph is worried that Raava will treat her like her parents treat her. As someone who's too weak and delicate to care for or defend themselves.

-From Raava's perspective, she doesn't like how chaotic Toph is, but overall feels the same way that she does for the rest of the Gaang. She comes to love her dearly. As much as she dotes on the Gaang, she doesn't at all think of any of them as being weak. Far from it! In her eyes they're all powerful warriors. They're her powerful warriors. Yes they are, yes they are~!

-Raava pretty much dotes on the Gaang and comes think of them as her children. She basically takes over Katara's role as group mom, which allows Katara to settle more into a role of being a kid.

-Even though Raava spoils the Gaang, she's also the fun police. The Gaang are all chaotic gremlins and Raava just wants them to stop and SETTLE DOWN FOR ONCE DAMMIT.

-Just an all powerful spirit vs the chaotic energy of a bunch of kids.

-At Wan Shi Tong's library, Raava joins the Gaang going inside. It's because of her that Wan Shi Tong allows them to peruse his collection.

-While he doesn't trust or like humans, he isn't dumb enough to defy a greater spirit. Especially not Raava.

-Let's just say, Raava has a bit of a reputation.

-The Gaang are able to spend a very long time in the library, building an extensive plan and knowledge base before they leave.

-Raava insists that Toph come into the library with them, offering to read to Toph whatever topic her heart desires. The idea makes Toph a little excited, but she makes it seem like she's only begrudgingly agreeing.

-You know Toph would take full advantage of Raava's offer and learn about everything her parents tried to hide from her.

-It does provide as an opportunity for Raava and Toph to bond. Toph finds that Raava's voice is nice to listen to, very soothing. She also finds that Raava isn't as judgmental as her parents. She judges Toph for her actions and her strength, not some preconceived notion that blindness=weakness.

-I'll probably have other times like this peppered throughout the story where various members of the Gaang get a one-on-one with Raava where she offers her I've-Been-Around-Since-The-Beginning-Of-Time-So-I-Must-Know-Something wisdom.

-Naturally, this means that the sandbenders are able to steal Appa unopposed.

-Since Appa has been stolen, Raava carries them all to Ba Sing Se. She tries to console Aang in his grief, but Aang shuts himself off from the rest of the group, and even blames Raava for Appa's disappearance.

-When they first find out, he blows up at her, screaming that she should have kept watch to make sure nothing happened to him.

-To which Raava rightly points out that not only is Appa a ten ton bison fully capable of handling himself, but also they don't know what happened to him, and leaving someone behind could have meant loosing two team members instead of one.

-Aang is upset enough to trigger the avatar state, but Raava uses her ties to him to pacify him instead.

-By the time Raava reaches the walls of Ba Sing Se, the city's generals have collected along with several soldiers. Being a giant, luminescent flatworm, Raava isn't too hard to spot. Even at a distance.

-Of course, the Gaang are all knocked out from prolonged contact with Raava so they're useless at the moment.

-The generals soon recognize Raava as being the one that brought down Zhao's fleet, and slightly concerned she'll do the same to the city, comply with her demands that the Gaang be given adequate shelter.

-The Gaang all wake up in a very nice house in the upper ring, Raava is quietly reading a play.

-For a while Aang resents Raava, feeling like it's her fault that Appa disappeared. Raava, understanding that he needs to time to process his grief, leaves him be.

-Raava actually likes Ba Sing Se. As a being of order, she sees the peaceful, orderly city as the way the world should be.

-She feels Long Feng's methods to be effective.

-This does drive a bit of a wedge between her and the Gaang, as none of them can properly comprehend spirit morality. Aang kind of understands, but he's kinda pissed at Raava.

-Raava decides to be patient with them, by this point she's realized that sometimes humans need time to understand things.

-Raava and Long Feng come to have an understanding.

-Even still, when Appa goes roaming out into the dark night, it's Raava and not Long Feng that he finds at the end of his journey.

-Aang is very happy to be reunited with Appa and apologizes for being cold/harsh with Raava. Raava just hugs him.

-Thanks to Raava and Long Feng's understanding, they manage to get a meeting with the Earth Kingdom generals to talk about the invasion of the Fire Nation.

-Since they get to Ba Sing Se earlier than in canon(again Raava is pretty good at keeping the children on task and getting/keeping them out of sticky situations) the drill appears much later during their time in Ba Sing Se.

-The Fire Nation didn't know that Raava was in Ba Sing Se, but figured that their reinforced drill would be tough enough to withstand- it's not.

-Raava just wants to blow the stupid thing up and be done with it, but Aang doesn't want Raava to do that because then a whole bunch of people will die. Raava doesn't care, a few human casualties is nothing compared to the havoc on the world's balance that the Fire Nation taking Ba Sing Se would bring.

-But Raava relents and decides to pull the drill apart, a slower and much harder process, but one that would be much less likely to harm anyone inside.

-They notice right away that Raava is attacking the drill, so Azula and her two friends go out to fight Raava and the Gaang.

-Mai and Ty Lee have learned their lessons about physical contact with Raava from the last time they fought.

-Azula uses her lightning on Raava, which while not deadly like it would be on a human, does actually hurt Raava.

-After being hit by multiple bolts of lightning, Raava lets go of mercy and trashes Azula.

-Thoroughly crushed, Azula and her friends have to go home with their tails between their legs.

-In this AU they never visit Kyoshi, and Appa's with Aang, so there's no one for Azula to disguise herself as.

-Azula also starts to crack a little bit earlier due to her complete inability to even pose a threat to Raava. As this forces her to reconsider deep aspects about herself and her own failings. After all, almost isn't good enough.

-Azula does try to tell herself that he usual tactics aren't working on Raava, because she's a spirit and spirits are fools. But deep down, she's always considered herself above the spirits. So it's not easy for her when this is called into question.

-The dangerous ladies do eventually manage to sneak into Ba Sing Se. Azula's plans remain more or less the same as canon.

-Though, I have started thinking that maybe Azula adds another to her posse, perhaps someone with spiritual expertise? No one can counter Raava in terms of power, but perhaps she can be countered in terms of spirituality?

-Either way, Azula fails to sway the Dai Li to her favor. In their eyes, Raava's favor of Long Feng means he's the one that was chosen by the fates to lead.

-So the dangerous ladies are arrested.

-I'm still deciding whether they break out or get brainwashed. I’m leaning towards epic jailbreak. But IDK.

-Iroh invites Raava to his tea shop, flirts and makes pleasant conversation with her. Much to Zuko's dismay, Iroh invites her back to their apartment to discuss a firebending teacher for the Avatar, as well as the Day of Black Sun.

-Oh yeah, Raava knows that Zuko and Iroh are Fire royals. She also knows that they're the only good options to fill Ozai's place when he's removed from power.

-All that said, the eclipse goes soooo much better than in canon. The Fire Nation legit don't know what's coming so no trap can be lain.

-Ozai is stripped of his power by Raava and thrown in jail.

-Zuko is crowned and rules with Raava constantly leering over his shoulder.

-Some notes about Raava's characterization in this AU; a pretty strong case for good is not nice. Raava can be very blunt and abrasive, also she nags and chides literally everyone. She absolutely loves and adores her Avatar, as well as the companions he travels with, but is overall critical of humankind. While the amount of people she likes is vanishingly small, she also doesn't really hate anyone(not even Vaatu). She's more like the tired kindergarten teacher who stares into the void as her students tear the classroom apart around her. Of course she’s also about a planc length from taping all the children to the floor.

-And if you think that's the end and everything just wraps up nicely and it's all happy good times from there...

-I admire your optimism.

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

athenas or the new ign videos... hmmm

im gonna go for the ign videos (moze gameplay and sanctuary-iii, no guns yet, i have a reason for that) because athenas hasn’t gotten its sweet instagram video yet. once that’s released i’ll do a full post on it. by the time i got around to finishing this post, they had released the video. oh boy... gonna do the gun post then the athenas post, i think. alright, off we go.

tl;dr: we read the entire end user agreement DAHL thrusts upon us for using the ECHO device, talk about some stuff like how (spoilers) it seems like Lilith will be getting her powers back at the end of the game, and a voice line Lily says that sounds like “Tyreen took my powers. it’s like Tannis said: [inaudible] Siren” (altho im not 100% sure on the [inaudible] part because 1) it sounds weird and 2) there’s a drum beat and also the devs are talking over her, the Siren part seems fairly accurate because of the way her mouth moves). so you know. im gonna be agonizing over that until i can hear what she says. ive already spent an hour just repeating it over and over. i nearly fell asleep lol

we’re gonna start with the moze gameplay (the first 14 minutes of bl3) because chronologically it’s first in both timeline and release date

i love the license plates on the right there

also it looks like they added in claptrap’s old welcome sign from windshear waste! time to stand in front of it for 30 minutes to see if any messages pop up like bl2

fast travel station as well, definitely going to see if/where i can teleport and going there immediately. i imagine this is more for DLC stuff and grinding tho.

also! i do believe we saw Covenant Pass previously. good to know this is actually where it is!

Marcus saying “And Welcome to Pandora!” in the beginning confirms that, yes, they’re going to be on a bus!! i wonder if there will be a fight scene before that though. it’s interesting Clappy mentions that “those jerks who tried to murder you are the children of the vault!” so i mean... there’s gotta be... right?

im also convinced this intro is going to be a mirror of Borderlands 1. i stg if it starts out with the first few notes of Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked and then swaps songs I’m going to lose my mind

also also, the order is totally going to mimic the bl1 one. Fl4k = Mordecai, Amara = Lilith, Moze = Roland, Zane = Brick. We even have Lilith taking Angel’s spot as the mysterious voice in our heads, and probably Marcus driving, AND being dropped off at a bus stop.

bet the reason they changed it from ‘Moze as the Bot Jock’ to ‘Moze as the Gunner’ is because it fits under ‘Roland as the Soldier’ better. Also, ‘Zane Flynt as Himselfs’ would be a play off ‘Brick as Himself’. Amara as the Siren is obvious, and ‘Mordecai as the Hunter’ vs ‘Fl4k as the Beastmaster’ is pretty similar as well, given Fl4k has all those Hunter skills.

the 4 basic emotes im guessing. im so glad we have the option to boop our friends in the face with emotes.

also moze’s little bunny skin is adorable

the ECHOnet used to be called “Riftspace”, “the Spline”, and... “MercTel: A Cyber-Dahl Joint” lmfao

specifically calls out Pandora. also, “artificial megastructures”??? THAT’S SO COOL

AND FUCKING

SENTIENT MEGASTRUCTURES???? 

gearbox. please. i have never ever wanted anything more in my life. please. it’s probably my birthday. PLEASE GEARBOX

also interesting that the user agreement specifically notes ‘Respawns’. I assume this is a joke because New-U stations have been confirmed not canon

“Core law”. Core law? Core... daddy? ... ????

core as in like a core government somewhere that’s not the border worlds? that’s interesting...

“The Legion”, okay, acknowledging TPS, that’s dope

“Project Blackrakk” ... im interested

“Thresher Company” lmao

im curious if Axton was apart of any of the mentioned ones. i don’t think it’s been stated, but i could be wrong

“Chieftain Oort”. also ‘Recently Legless Gary’, lmfao poor dude.

oh yeah im sure this is fine. also holy shit did they google the synonyms for ‘change’ and just start listing them? lmfao

“implicit subscription to the Digby Vermouth ‘Dig’s Gigs’ secret concert subscription service” 

sorry, what?

if this doesn’t come up again in the future- if we don’t get a spam letter or 3 in our mailbox about this concert subscription thing i'm gonna be so disappointed

Dahl hates you if you’re not a fan of hyper-jazz, “you snob” lmfao

my brain hurts, they’re good at writing these 

damn phones exist? i thought everything was ECHO. aight, that’s good to know. i guess there just aren’t any phone networks around the border worlds

also “shared dreamspaces” sound really cool

hm. that’s no good lmfao. also i love that the buttons are ‘Agree’ and ‘OK’. there is no escape, once you agree, you can’t even leave because you’re agreeing that you’re trapped with these rules even if you cancel.

that’s fucked up, DAHL. can’t believe you treat your user base the same way you treat your employees. i guess i shouldn’t be surprised.

anyway, shoutout to literally the only TOA I’ve ever fully read in my life.

also, clicking through this TOA too fast WILL end claptrap’s voice line early. so be careful if you want to hear what he has to say!!

oh shit lmao I gotta go edit that Fl4k post

ok im back ~time magic of being able to save things in drafts and post them at a later date~

sliding preserves momentum, so you can actually slide (nearly) the entire way down! i love this.

small, but claptrap bends his antennae when trying to be stealthy. i thought that was a pretty cool detail

“and some guns include an alternate shooting mode~! try it out!”

player: `immediately shoots claptrap in the face`

i died lol

a very nice look at this sign.

good to know that the twins really are tempting people to join with promises of food. i mean it makes sense, i imagine most of the cultists are desperate for stability and a reasonable life on pandora.

also, Shiv calls himself “holy influencer of the children of the vault” lol. i love that. gearbox really is going for the internet’s throat, isn’t it?

i do like that hovering over an NPC will give you their name only and not name/healthbar.

a better look at one of the signs referencing the Mother!!! i was waiting for this, the only real look we got at one was in that one scene with Moze and IB

“Behold the Mother strength surrender to the truth” 

yeah that’s not ominous...

i assume the mother and father are intended to be tyreen and troy? but idk how i feel about that implication...

i like the new little gear/spring effect for the magnet lol

new lilith! i know a lot of people don’t like it, but i do. she looks better than the bl2 vers. altho i think it’s weird they swapped both bl1 and bl2′s ‘AI’ effect to those dots and then didn’t bring it to BL3. the dots effect felt cleaner. curious why they’re not applying it to bl3 when they went thru all that effort in 1 and 2.

... back up please.

i like that there is a changing icon for long pressing now

“time to check out our slay of the day!” sounds like Tyreen but tbh i legit thought this was moze’s reaction to opening the chest at first lol 

you can hear someone start screaming in agony while she’s walking up the stairs, so i know it’s not moze, but im so used to the VHs talking when they see a new piece of loot my brain just assumed.

also THE MUSIC IN THE BACKGROUND IS A REMIX OF BANDIT SLAUGHTER!!! IM SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS I WAS FREAKING OUT THE FIRST TIME I HEARD IT

also, claptrap when dropping health yells “this could save your life! then, you’ll owe me a life debt!” bullshit im pretty sure you already decided we owed you a life debt the moment we stepped off that bus

“i see it... the great vault” - a line from a cultist you kill

i know i mentioned in this post that the Great Vault may be already opened, but it could also just be a Vault they’re planning on opening and using the propaganda to convince the cultists to help them find it. 

“if you help us get this vault open, you’ll be handsomely rewarded! you’ll get superpowers! you’ll get regular meals! you’ll get money and guns and dates!” you know, the usual stuff. 

either way, elevating the Vault to a higher state (god/heaven/whatever) makes sense if you’re running a cult.

btw there is a hidden chest in the scaffolding to the left of the door, if you’re interested in grabbing some better guns before shiv. personally, i’ll be using the toy guns.

also the TVs are actually playing propaganda now!!

this one is asking questions that i cant understand due to the sound effects of the chest and claptrap talking, but it says something about “... the dust? ... join the Children of the Vault!”

“hey shiiiiiv all your dumb friends are dead!!”

shiv be like

“all my friends are dead”

some cool level-up art! I notice these are the same pictures as used on the japanese site. i wonder if they change depending on which VH you’ve picked (If you’re playing Amara/Fl4k, do you get pics of Amara and Fl4k? the player is playing moze, afterall).

also also “it’s a KIA on the knife wielding maniac. suuuper dead.” 

it’s cool that the VHs have specific lines for the deaths of bosses. i hope that continues and it’s not just a ‘15 min of intro gameplay’ thing. you know, where everything is super detailed in the beginning and then slowly gets less and less as the game progresses? anyway, moze’s little chuckle is fuckin adorable lol

ah. the door closes now so you can’t even explore Shiv’s room before Lilith shows up. gearbox plS you know me too well, i was looking for a g l i m p s e

claptrap’s voice line for getting released is SUPER off time, he hits the ground before going “you did it! i’m sa-ahhhhhhhh!” it’s weird, wondering if that’s just a glitch.

also also we get a nice listen to the revive ally sound. i could’ve sworn it wasn’t in the first look at this mission we got, because i heard it for the first time during the coop Zane/Amara gameplay on Promethea. i might be wrong, tho.

im very curious what these symbols are claptrap is beaming up

i mean you know what im gonna say

they look eridian

and they do

so wtf clappy why u beaming up eridian letters to Lilith

i assume maybe Tannis gave clappy some weird upgrade or something so he could communicate with the crimson raiders without the CoV listening in? it could be that Tannis or someone is decoding this message since Tannis does know how to translate Eridian (as shown in her bl1 ECHOs)

... or at the very least she gave Lilith a translator

the darkening makes it so that you can see the crackening. also this COULD just be a beam that lilith can see from wherever she is, but i want to believe there’s more eridian stuff. bc eridian stuff is fun.

this is so fu cking crisp im dying i love it

lilith’s tattoos spreading down her fingers

same symbol as her chest tattoo. maybe the symbol denotes new powers? like how lily has one on her chest for phasewalking, and a new one on her hand for teleportation

i love how her wings look like actual fire. i fucking love this

lilith is looking so fucking good in the new engine

im glad they got rid of her super red eyes, tbh it looked a bit weird

i think they are really pushing her fire affinity, im sure we’ll see Maya has an elemental affinity as well (im calling corrosive) and im sure Tyreen will too (slag). Amara looks to be Shock because that’s her ‘default’, but who knows until (if) bl4 comes out. but corrosive wings on maya would look SOOO fucking cool. please. please please please.

god she looks so good compared to bl2. i love how the tattoos softly glow in the dark, too. i gotta play this mission late in the day...

“you’re... the voice in my head, right?” i love this so much, i really hope my shitpost comes true.

lilith gives you a grenade mod for completing her mission! im really glad they are PUSHING through the tutorial/intro so you can get right into the game. bl2′s ‘intro’ of all these tutorials was brutal. especially waiting to unlock your action skill.

in 3 you get your action skill automatically at level 2!!! which is insane, i love it! they’re jumping right into it, it’s great. and they seem to be pushing for you to get all the stuff you need right away. 

it’s curious to note that in bl3 we get our class mods at the end of the Promethea demo (after Gigamind), since in bl2 you get your first (usually?) after the hunting the firehawk mission and both seem to take place immediately after we get to the ‘base of operations’ of the game (Sanctuary vs Sanctuary-III).

yep that quest is 100% in line with the quest marker. 

i imagine From the Ground Up may be discovering where the Vault Map/Key actually is? maybe bringing people to the Recruitment Center (notably Tannis)

for this scene. i hope this takes place after the HBC, because i seriously... can’t imagine the twins showing up, taking the Vault Map, bringing it to the HBC, and then NOT taking Lilith’s powers/trying to kill Lily and accidentally taking her powers. it just doesn’t make sense, Vault Hunters be damned, we are level 2 they could melt us easy peasy. 

If anything, it feels like we COULD find the Vault Map in the Recruitment Center, Tannis tries to activate it/fix it, we find out it’s mega broke, and then the Sun Smashers show up and take it. but i seriously can’t imagine Lilith nor the new VHs allowing that to happen while they’re still there. maybe if Tannis sends us to do something while Lilith is gathering other CR members? then it could make sense if they attack while Tannis is alone with the Key...

OR

we end up finding something in Shiv’s room that shows/helps us realize the Sun Smashers bringing the Vault Map to the Calypsos. tho this would mean the quest From the Ground Up is SUPER short and I imagine it’s not. Maybe we raid a camp of theirs like the one in front of Sanc-III with the bridge/ramp? We need to be about level 6 before we go and we start From the Ground Up at 2 so there’s obviously something DEEP we’re missing here. maybe this is a mission where we go gather the other Crimson Raiders? HMMMMMMMM...

.... oh.

nevermind lmfao

she opens her ECHO immediately after this LOL i feel kinda dumb now

raiding their camp it is! the Droughts sounds like a fun location. Very much like the dust. you guys think there’s a Shade situation going on there? i’m excited to see it. Still think we’re going to use Shiv’s room to get that lead, though. i just really wanna watch tv lmfao. i hope this means the bandits run from the camp to the HBC, or we find info that the bandit warchief sent a party to the HBC with the Vault Map. either way, i just don’t want the twins showing up until after the HBC or i will have so many questions. “why didn’t you kill lilith?” being the first. “the god queen wants her head!” ur goddamn right she does, so why doesn’t she (try to) kill lilith???

85% already?! hot damn

also

that’s one badass description there, Moze

also also

while having gun slots locked is pretty normal, im surprised they’re locking class mods and relics, too! i wonder when we’ll be able to equip relics. maybe when we first go to eden-6 or smth. or maybe after we meet up with Rhys. shit maybe he’s just handing us an artifact (im gonna interchange these a lot, sorry!) in that Promethea video lmfao

“ready to chuck some boom and frag some maniacs” lol moze i love you

if you’re playing Zane... `equips grenade mod for checkmark` `immediately equips second action skill and never actually uses grenade mod`

“it’s the firehawk! the god queen wants her head!” 

like i alluded to before, i would not be surprised if Tyreen doesn’t know she can absorb Siren powers... when she goes to succ lilith in front of Sanctuary-III, it’s totally possible she actually was trying to kill her. That could explain why she looks so intrigued at her hand like “oh shit okay lets see what this can do”

might be why she was okay with sending her cultists after her instead of showing up herself.

“alright, we got a foothold. maybe things are turning our way. come on killer, you’re with me” we are going to explore the SHIT out of shiv’s room.

alright alright alright

let’s move on to the Sanctuary-III stuff

yessss

i love the quest objective thing, it looks like we will be able to swap through our quests with the push of a button! also im curious why exactly we’re going to promethea right away. i wonder if the twins say something about moving there after getting the vault map/lilith’s powers, or if we hear from rhys. im expecting something about the vault map, since our vh will admit they don’t know rhys at all when talking to lorelei. but for some reason we need to be within the city limits? since lily says ellie got us within the city limits. 

hmmmmmm. okay, okay, maybe the map was trying to lead us to promethea for vault reasons during that short amount of time that we had it and it was working. maybe promethea is what we see when tannis is activating the key during that one cutscene? ohhh shit how dope would it be if we got that fucking easter egg message? omg “Children of the Vault. Come to Promethea. We are not on Pandora anymore. Tannis is not what she seems. Do not open the Vaults.” and everyone is like ‘uh did that thing just mention Tannis by name??’ and now it’s REALLY important to get the map back just so we can figure out wtf it’s trying to tell us. 

i will question how ‘Tannis is not what she seems’ would affect character relationships, especially if it’s said so early in the game. so perhaps we only hear the first part of the message. maybe it’s corrupted because it was recently broken. iunno. just playing around with ideas. the canon of this game is like flarp putty until sept. 13th

anyway moving on because this is literally the first f r a m e of the video

i like that you can see pandora’s eridian scar. if the destroyer is speaking through eridium to people, it’s gonna bust outta the side of this planet like you wouldn’t fucking believe lmao. eridium is a window to the soul and if you stare long enough into its glossy, shining sides, the destroyer stares back

that or it’s just like a beacon, slowly spreading its influence across the universe. but i like the idea that the destroyer can waltz out of a big enough hunk of eridium. so it will bust out of pandora’s eridium scar. F in chat for pandora but also lmfao the amount of tentacles and rage would be unparalleled.

reality is that the twins are probably farming this scar for eridium to turn into slag for multiple purposes. like brainwashing their cultists, giving them powers, and ensuring their guns have their manufacturer’s quirk (im getting to this in my next post bc im just gonna compile all the ign gun videos into one big post)

the floor art is different from the actual sanc-iii demo. i mention this first in my behind closed doors panel analysis, but im gonna mention it again because this is ~official~. the floor list on the first walkthru of sanc-iii we got had the names of all the crimson raiders and lines leading to their shops. so we had the infirmary/tannis, marcus, moxxi, etc listed on the floor. i imagine this new sanc-iii will change as we get more people on board or if we do a sort of re-decoration of the ship.

also also, it’s cool to see that we have 4 rooms on the minimap, likely one for each of the VHs (and your coop buddies). ive seen speculation that the other, non-played VHs will hang out in their rooms when you’re not playing them, and tbh i really hope this is the case.

we also know this version of sanctuary-iii is after pandora, so there are no promethea citizens aboard yet. which makes me double certain the first sanc-iii video we got takes place either after endgame (explaining why Lily has her tattoos back) or right after Athenas (explaining why Maya is there). which... i mean... spoilers, guys. 

that’s one good lookin fast travel station, holy shit

im in tears over here because “Caution: no steppy”. this is so fucking funny to me

no steppy on me

okay moving on because i will cry laugh over this for forever im allowed

moze’s room is so much different than amara’s

also i notice she’s on the left of the two on the top, which makes me hope the other 4 are reserved for the other VHs (or your coop buddy).

compared to the official sanc-iii demo video

and amara’s room

moze’s is so barren oh my god

someone get this girl like... a colorful throw pillow or something

baaank. also doubles as the secret stash. kinda upsetting, because that is infinitely less loot i can store when i make a lot of characters. also if i upgrade the bank once, is it upgraded across all my other characters too? or are the guns i put in storage slot 11 locked up until i buy the upgrade?

either way, i am saddened because no more mule characters. and way less space the more characters you make and more gear you find, because all gear you put in here is there across all characters. i hope this means our backpacks will be a lot bigger this time around!

supamax mfg shows up again

ppm/04-02 matches up with the number behind the fast travel station. i wonder if this will come into play. if the number changes later in-game im going to freak the fuck out bc that means wherever we are isn’t actually sanctuary-iii

ppm/04-02. remember that 👀

also, the wall behind the golden chest changed from red to steel/greenish. can’t tell the actual color. same as the floor

you know. that color.

“golden keys are popular. you can get some in-game and also get them online”

in-game you say??? im interested! i wonder if there will be some sort of arena (like moxxi’s) where if you complete it you get a key as a reward. i saw people speculating about some sort of randomized boss rush, that could definitely be a way to get gold keys, as well.

oooo engine room! im excited to explore here.

original size is 16. so, we have 40 backpack slots! still... you know... only 1 above the max of bl2, but hey. at least that’s an upgrade. as small as it may be

on the bright side: bank upgrades increase capacity by 5. with a base of 10, and 8 upgrades, we have 50 slots to fill. which is a big leap from the original 24. it is still a shame we have to share these across characters, tho

offline cultist stream? makes me think the CoV really was trying to steal/take over sanc-iii from the crimson raiders and we went to go take it (back?) in Taking Flight. either the CoV found/ordered Sanc-III, or the crimson raiders were building it/fixing it up, their stronghold got taken over, and the CoV were prepping it for takeover.

the shooting range. and if you notice that little CoV symbol in the bottom left there? yeah pretty much backs up my previous theory

all those red bits are tied to ellie’s crew challenge. so we’ll be collecting things for her!

an altar for scooter 😢

“we’re gonna get those cultism sumbitches, believe you me”

where you get yeeted out of Sanc-III. im definitely going to try jumping in it to see if it kills me. doesn’t look like the drop pods are available yet

that’s not clappy, pretty sure he’s hanging out on the bridge right now

schematics for veronica

the thing i was most excited about in this video!

loooots of customizations! which excites me because i know eridium used to get useless late game when you’ve grinded all the raid bosses. it looks like eridum is going to be in ultra high demand. but u can bet ur ass im gonna be unlocking all those fucking customizations asap.

veteran rewards is also super super interesting

hgggggg i wanna know what the shields do!!! 

i like the vault symbol at the top of the item card as well, shows you its a special type of weapon/item. im honestly surprised we’re able to buy ‘veteran rewards’ so early in the game? i mean obvi we won’t have enough eridium (look at the costs!) but it’s wild it’s even accessible. im personally a fan of the first bonus ‘anointed: gain life steal on action skill end’

looks like these guns have been chosen

to give them those special bonuses

i do see that just anointed is not class specific, but the ones that say anointed gunner or maybe anointed siren will be (confirmed by the devs in video).

you pay with eridium, so maybe the vending machine has some way to confer the power of eridium to the guns. or some shit. iunno. it’s possible this won’t be available until the end of the game, hence veteran rewards, and is only being shown to us right now since this is a showcasing video.

pandoran civilian. no promethea civilians today folks! i am CONVINCED that the old sanc-iii demo takes place after the end of the game. at least after athenas.

it’s weird seeing moxxi hanging outside her bar.

is also cool to know that the 4 slot machines are actually available. seems like npcs can play them, but we can use all 4 if we want to. which is really nice

the one on the far left is called the ‘loot boxxer’ and it gives mostly guns lol. i see they are taking jabs. good for them

better pic of the leftmost machines

Zer0 seems to have a bounty board? not sure if this is like a physical bounty board or if they will contact you when they want something dead, but it is cool to note. this isn’t shown in video, just the devs speaking about it.

similarly hammerlock has ‘big game hunts’ where you find “rare, challenging creatures” and kill them for him

apparently we’ll be killing something known as a manvark

this book

i fucking recognize this book

HAMMERLOCK NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

in all seriousness tho

hammerlock probably isn’t in his room because we haven’t rescued him from eden-6 yet.

a cool thing about the crew challenges: as you progress through the game and do these challenges, sanc-iii will ‘grow and change to reflect the things you’ve accomplished’. altho another dev says “sometimes these are optional things, like challenges” 

so now im like oh shit we’re gonna change sanc-iii as we play the game. i wonder if that means we’ll be changing the hull, too. because you know. the blue paint job. we gotta go STEALTH. sneaky beaky into the calypsos fleety

tannis doesn’t have the saurian on her table. also, interesting note, she DOES have the eridian log in the corner. meaning she must have had that before eden-6. interesting... maybe we’ll find more on Pandora.

she is still covered in blood tho. idk i don’t have an explanation for that. don’t think i want to think of one, to be quite honest.

oh no. (those are skulls next to all the gurneys)

“tannis plays a much bigger role in bl3 than she has in past games”. bigger than borderlands 1? that is... impressive. she’ll be running the health vending machines (which is weird bc i could’ve sworn in the promethea demo, zed was still running them... hm.)

another angle of sanc-iii

clappy? you good there?

the devs said they’re using him to plug a hole. i assume the calypsos shot at the ship as we’re leaving or smth.

lily with no tattoos, who also looks significantly more pissed than her other sanc-iii demo counterpart

you know. because she got her tattoos.

also

fucking

lilith says something right here. all i can make out is “Tyreen took my powers. it’s like tannis said. ..... [inaudible] Siren.” maybe some weird word i haven’t heard before? i swear she’s saying ‘like tannis said: a ‘m...’ Siren” but i am not 100% sure. if someone could help me out, that’d be rad.

so its sounding like lilith rushed in with explicit warning from tannis about tyreen stealing her powers, and tannis knew tyreen was some sort of Siren and warned lily, but lily didn’t listen. it could also be that lily is saying something like “im not a siren” but i can’t really hear it if she is. it sounds like she saying a word that starts with m to me. if someone could help me with this i’d owe you my life

whew. i am. fucking TIRED.

im gonna sleep for like 3 hours and then wake up and make food before the fl4k streams start.

[kasiagrey]

The Hunter and the Doe

A simple short story that will be connected to my Apprentice’s fanfic series whenever I finally get around to it. 

Here we have a young Montag out for a hunt with his father. It seems that everything is just a normal hunt for our young prince until he comes across something he’s never seen before... 

Note that this story is subject to change. 

Lutz’s look is not canon! This is just how I imagine he’d look. 

Also, this is a fanfic, so all copyrights belong to Nix Hydra's Arcana Game.

Last edited: April 17th, 2019

********************

    The first rays of the early dawn began to spread across the landscape. Pine trees covered in snow gleamed in its golden light, but below, the ground was still cast in a cold shade. One could still feel the lingering chill of the vanquished night whilst clouds of breath roll forth from one’s lips. Still, this was a good morning for a hunt between a father and his son. At least, that's how one tribesman chose to see it. 

    Originally, he had been very upset with being awakened at such early hours. The kid had always been one to sleep in, but when he learned he was hunting with his father, he was motivated to get up. Tasked with bringing back food, a young Montag and his father stalked the forest grounds. The blonde appeared to be thirteen years of age, somewhat thin but clearly beginning to develop a warrior's form.  

    Compared to his father, Montag seemed quite small; the man was almost as large as a bear. He was a tall masculine figure with the strong build of a warrior. Combed back as best as the man could manage, auburn hair burned like a crimson fire. It was quite easy to tell where Montag had taken his hairstyle from; though his father’s was slightly longer. A matching beard, groomed and maintained, adorned his father's strong face. Bright blue eyes scanned the area like a hawk, looking for any signs of movement. Indeed, with his nose, he even resembled a bird of prey. It was a fine nose, but one that had broken once or twice in life. This imposing sight of a man was known by the name Lutz.

    The two were armed with a single spear, a bow, and a quiver of arrows; one for protection and the other for hunting. Wishing to keep the element of surprise in their favor, the father reached out for his son. A massive hand clasped his shoulder, gaining Montag's silent attention. After a few motions of his hand, Lutz turned to the right and walked further into the forest.

    Split up. We'll cover ground. Montag nodded in understanding and took the left.

    Eyes scanned every direction as he continued onwards. His ears strained to hear the slightest sound other than the occasional breeze of coming winter. Every now and then, he'd alter his course slightly in order to remain downhill. The young man must have walked for only an hour before he spotted tracks in the snow and occasional patch of earth. He could tell he was tracking a deer, probably a young adult, given its size. Montag walked a little further, keeping his sight on the trail. There was only one set of tracks, which meant one deer.

     They were fresh too, so they were close. Quickly thinking, the blonde located a patch of earth that was not coated in icy snow. Taking up a handful of old leaves and pine straw, he began to cover his human scent the best he could. His face frowned in disapproval as he saw his clothes become damp and dirty, but this was hunting; a noble sport for warriors. He could deal with a little filth if it meant getting his prize. Once Montag felt he had done a good enough job, he returned to the tracks and resumed his pursuit. 

     The tribesman must have walked for a half hour before he finally met the end of his search. When he saw the animal that he had been tracking, the blonde could not help how his jaw dropped. Silver eyes grew wide as he tried to comprehend what he was seeing. There it was, a vision of beauty; a white doe. Montag watched the creature as it searched for food beneath the glittering snow. What little sunlight that did come through the trees made its coat seem to glow with an ethereal light. He noticed how sleek and delicately framed it was. The long slender legs were perfect for giving chase and leaping over great obstacles. Young, vibrant, and full of life; the very picture of radiance.

     A small breeze brought the hunter to his senses and once his spear had been gently set down, he carefully readied his bow. With the arrow in place, young Montag drew back the string and took aim. Attempting to calm his rapidly beating pulse, he took a slow breath and relaxed his shoulders. His sight along the arrow, he watched it for just a little longer. Either the doe could hear the hammering of his excited heart or he did not mask his scent well enough, but something happened to cause the creature to stop abruptly. 

    Lifting its head, it turned its gaze in his direction. The white beast was eerily still along with the whole forest; everything seemed to hold its breath. Dark wide eyes met with silver and there was a moment where Montag had thought against letting his arrow fly. The eyes seemed wise and in tune with all around it, something about that made the creature even more mystical. Suddenly, the memory of why he was out there came to him. He was tasked with bringing back game for the tribe. He was doing this with his father. He was doing all this not just because he enjoyed it, but to gain some sort of recognition! Such a prize would place all eyes on him! 

    Dammit, Montag, take the shot!

    Where time seemed to have once stopped, time now seemed to fast forward. It all happened so quickly; one moment he had let go of the arrow and the next he was on the ground wiping snow out of his eyes. When he looked towards the deer, he saw that his arrow had barely missed its mark and the white doe escaped deep into the forest. Realizing what had just happened, Montag shifted his attention to what had knocked him over. There, before him, was his father.

    The man was out of breath, still staring off in the direction the deer had left. His father had shoved him down, preventing him from taking his prey! "Why did you do that?" Montag asked stunned before growing angry. His brows furrowed as his face grew slightly red. "I could have killed it. I would have been the one to bring home a great feast!” Like the speed of a snake, Lutz turned on his son. A baritone voice greeted Montag’s ears, and immediately silenced him. 

    "You would have brought doom upon your head, boy! That’s what you would have done!" Doom? This struck a chord with the younger male. What harm could have come from slaying a deer? "What's that supposed to mean,” Montag asked. Obviously, he was still upset about the whole situation entirely but was more than willing to learn the meaning behind his father’s actions. Lutz, finally catching his breath, just stared at his child. The warrior knew his son hungered for the chance to be recognized, and he had ambition, even his father saw that. Still, if he didn’t get that under control, it would be his undoing one day. The older male sighed at this and shook his head, offering his hand to his boy. 

    "I suppose you were never told. Well, better I tell you now before you do something reckless like that again." Still scowling, the blonde stared at the hand for a moment before taking it with a firm grip. With a small grunt, the father helped pull his son to his feet. Montag began to brush the snow off himself, leaning down afterward to pick up his bow and his spear. Lutz, leaning on his own spear, then looked to the sky as if trying to recall a distant memory. 

    "For as long as the tribes have been around, white beasts of the forest have always been elusive and viewed with high respect. Since they are so rare, it is said they are otherworldly.” Those blue hues then fell upon his son before speaking again, “To be quite honest, Monty, I never thought I'd live long enough to see one.” The boy’s expression softened noticeably as he took in this information. 

    Taking this as a sign to continue, Lutz explained more, “When they make an appearance, it is believed to be a sign of good fortune. However, those that have killed such creatures have met with hardships and ill fates." The elder thought back to earlier when he suddenly felt a sense of dread wash over him. He knew something wasn’t right and felt that his boy was at the center of it. The man was grateful that he was still spry enough to have caught up with Montag; a second too late and his over-eager son would have brought disaster on himself. 

    With how close he had come to killing the doe, Montag shuddered over the possibilities if his father had not come. His voice nearly wavered over the dark thoughts yet held strong, "What do you mean by otherworldly? Like demons?" Were they anything like those entities he had grown up knowing all his life? Did they demand respect and admiration, or were they just part of the world around them? A million more thoughts ran through his mind, but not one of them could overshadow how close he was to committing such folly.  

    At the young man’s question, Lutz shook his head and explained further. "Not quite, Monty. Demons use deceptions to get what they want. Even when it seems like they are helping, they are truly after what they can get. There is more out there than just demons. Things that no man is supposed to see or even know of. Probably for the best. As for the white beasts, think of them as animals of flesh and blood visiting from somewhere we will never set eyes on." 

    With his questions answered, the blonde was content with what he knew...for now. Sighing, the boy kicked at the snow; more out of boredom than anything. "I suppose that means we'll have to keep looking for other game, huh?" Just his luck; a fine prize standing right before him and he had to let it go. Still, a part of Montag was relieved to have not slain the deer. 

    With a hearty laugh, the older man nodded as he grinned at his child; the same one that his son had clearly inherited from him. "Aye, hopefully, this time we'll find a large stag to take home. The great hall could use a new set of antlers." Turning, the man went further into the woods. “Come on, Monty. I saw some tracks earlier so let’s go find those again. I think they’re this way.” 

    “Yes, papa,” said the young tribesman. However, before walking any further, Montag turned to face where the deer had once stood. He vividly recalled the moment when he laid eyes upon it and noticed how the area seemed just plain and ordinary now. It was disappointing, really, as he had hoped to see just a glimpse of it; he wondered if he would ever see the white doe again. 

********************

Thanks for taking time out of your day to read my work and I hope you enjoyed it. If you have any constructive criticism, I am all ears!

I made this piece after planning more of my Apprentice’s backstory, characteristics, and I’ve even designed her Masquerade dress thanks to the help of Azalea’s Dolls. Three guesses to the theme of her outfit after reading this story~ -wink-

I grew up learning some things about Celtic beliefs and one that always stood out was stories about White Stags and the spirits that people would encounter in the woods. I thought it would be fitting for our Golden Hunter. I’m a sucker for symbolism and such, can’t you tell?

I decided to go with this story because I think it gives a deep-rooted reason to why Lucio has so many white animals in his life. It’s a story he would hear from his father and it stuck with him well into adulthood.

Also, I imagine that Montag probably had a better relationship with his dad than his mother. I mean, yes, it was confirmed that it was when Montag killed Lutz that he was truly proud of his son, but even so, I think they got along socially. Hell, I’m even certain Lutz was more father material than Morga was mother material. Clearly, both parents messed up somewhere along the line, but the point is that Montag isn’t scared shitless of his own father. Just saying. That said, I still want Morga and Lucio to talk to each other in his route. It doesn’t have to be all peaches and cream at the end between the two of them, just help them better understand one another, dammit!

BTW, LUTZ USES ANTLERS IN ALL OF HIS DECORATING!

[rahirah]

Okay, I KNOW you've reblogged that "DVD commentary" meme at some point in your life, so: would you like to do DVD commentary on the opening scene of "My Baby Is A Centerfold"? (Or less detailed commentary on the whole "My Baby Is A Centerfold"?)

My Baby Is A Centerfold DVD Commentary

I wrote this story in 2004, fifteen years ago, so fair warning, I don't recall a lot of the minutiae that went through my head when I was writing it. However, I will do my best!

This was one of the first short stories I wrote set in the same universe as my novel series. I wrote it for the Summer of Spike community over on Livejournal – Summer of Spike was, I believe, the first of the "seasonal" fic communities, and inspired a lot of imitators (including Seasonal Spuffy and Summer of Giles, which are still going to this day) but it only lasted for a couple of rounds. Anyway, someone had recently asked me what happened to the Trio in my 'verse. I already knew that the Trio had started their careers as criminal masterminds while the events of Necessary Evils were going on, and that after NE ends, Warren would try enslaving Katrina in pretty much the same way, Katrina would end up dead, and Warren would try to frame Buffy. Buffy being in a very different frame of mind by this point in my 'verse, while she initially panics at the thought that she accidentally killed someone, Spike and Dawn are able to convince her to investigate first. And of course they discover that Katrina's been dead for several hours, so they call the police and that's when Terminal Line takes place, and Buffy makes first contact with Detective Nguyen, who becomes a recurring NPC and eventually the captain of the Sunnydale PD and is instrumental in Buffy's plan to bring the supernatural out in the open and ANYWAY.

For this story I wanted to do a lighthearted buddy cop sort of thing with Spike and Dawn, and it occurred to me that the Trio would have had to have set up their spy camera system, but since they all got arrested after the Katrina incident, they never had the chance to do anything with the footage. And in my 'verse, some of that footage would have been pretty racy. So what would happen if Buffy and Spike found out about it? The story pretty much wrote itself from there.

I could tell something was wrong the minute I walked in the door. The house had that too-quiet thundercloud feeling about it, and it wasn't just because of the blackout curtains. Buffy was still at the rink, Tara was at her summer job, and Willow was probably asleep (she's not as much of an early riser as Spike is). Normally this means an afternoon of bad TV and junk food with Spike, but the TV wasn't on. Spike always has the TV on.

So this story takes place between Necessary Evils and A Parliament of Monsters, when Spike has moved in with Buffy and Dawn, and Willow and Tara are renting the Summers's basement. It always bugged me that the characters on the show only had to worry about work when the plot required it. When the writers get bored, Buffy can suddenly support a dozen people on a starting school counselor's salary. So while I try not to make a huge deal of it in my 'verse, I do a lot of thinking about how everyone supports themselves. Especially people like Tara, who's sure as hell not getting any money from her family. And with Buffy I wanted to give her a day job that A) she would enjoy, and B) would be flexible with regard to slaying. Which is how she became a skating instructor.

When Spike moved in there was a whole big reshuffling thing, like musical chairs with bedrooms, and Spike ended up getting my old room as an office for Bloody Vengeance Inc., the demon-hunting business he and Anya started. I figured he was probably holed up in there downloading porn or something. Never overlook an opportunity to collect blackmail material is my motto. I dumped my library books on the couch and snuck upstairs with super-Slayer's-sister stealth, which wouldn't do me any good at all if Spike was actually, like, paying attention to his super-keen vampire hearing. Which apparently he wasn't, since I got all the way upstairs without a single physically impossible threat bellowed in my direction.

I had an argument about this with another fic writer once – she felt that Spike threatening Dawn with physical harm was abusive and horrible, and Dawn would be traumatized for life. I pointed out that A) it's canon that Spike does this when he's worried about Dawn's safety, and B) even if you're not a soulless vampire, it's really common for fear in a de facto parental unit to express itself as anger, C) does anyone seriously believe that Spike would ever follow through on any of those over the top threats? Seriously? And D) Dawn canonically blows off said threats and does not appear to actually feel threatened in the slightest. We ended up agreeing to disagree.

Spike was in the office, all right--I could see his hair glowing in the light of the computer monitor. I couldn't see what he was looking at, but whatever it was, it must have been really good, 'cause his eyeballs were practically SuperGlued to the screen. Or maybe really bad, because he looked horrified, not turned on. OK, what horrified William the Bloody? Besides the prospect of squiring Buffy to "Fantasy On Ice?" This I had to see. I rounded Spike's desk and peered over his shoulder. "Hey, mister, you got feelthy pictures?"

If it was Willow? Two clicks of a mouse's tail and whatever was in that window would be closed, password protected, PGP-encrypted, and accessible only through an FTP server in Outer Mongolia. Spike's way better with technology than some vampires I could name, but when he's taken by surprise he still resorts to more primitive methods. He scrambled around in his chair with the panicky flail of a cat falling off a windowsill and slapped a hand across my eyes. "Don't look!" he ordered, about half an octave higher than usual.

This story is full of early 2000s-computer jargon. It's not quite as dated as the show itself, but I give it the ol' college try.

Which meant it was a moral imperative for me to put some of that self-defense training he'd been giving me into practice and kick him in the shins--oh, come on, you'd have done it, too. "Fuck!" Spike yelled. He grabbed for his ankle, overbalanced, and banged his head on the edge of the desk as his chair rolled out from under him. He crashed to the floor, leaving me with a free-and-clear view of the computer.

For someone who's been accused of writing the Everybody Loves Spike Show, I sure have him behave like an idiot a lot.

Now, I want to make it real clear that I'm a sixteen-year-old of the world. I know all about the birds and the bees and the vampires. I've even done a little buzzing myself. And of course I know that my sister and Spike have--well, 'having sex' is way too tame for what they do. Anyway, I know all about The Sex in theory. I also know how sausages are made, in theory. That doesn't mean I'm panting for an up-close at the gooey details of either process. Especially when it involves a grainy RealPlayer file of my very naked sister bouncing up and down on my very naked best-friend-and-platonic-lust-object in Barbie's S&M Playhouse.

I may have written this whole story just to have an excuse to use the term "Barbie's S&M Playhouse."

I may have said something. It may have been 'gleep.' Luckily for my retinas, at that minute Spike lunged up over the edge of the desk and put his fist through the screen. The monitor exploded in a shower of pretty green sparks, and Spike stood there glaring at it all clenchy-jawed and snarly, breathing hard through his teeth. He turned the glare on me. "I swear by all that's unholy, Bit, the next time you sneak up on me like that I'm going to put you in a two-by-three box without benefit of hacksaw!"

Monitors! With! TUBES!!!

I glared right back--no way was he going to make this my fault. "How was I supposed to know you were watching Vampire Pervert Theater 3000?" I snapped. "I thought you were just watching NORMAL porn! Jeez, Spike, if you and Buffy are gonna to videotape your stay in the Satellite of Love, at least--"

I had another discussion with a beta about whether or not Spike would download porn. My argument was "He's a guy." 

Spike vamped out and hurled the monitor clean off the desk and into the wall with a roar (and when I say 'roar,' I don't mean 'loud yell,' I mean 'roar') of "WE DIDN'T BLOODY WELL TAPE IT!"

Wow. I never knew monitors were made up of that many pieces. "You mean you taped it without telling her?" I squeaked.

"NO!" Spike flexed his computer-punching hand (bloody knuckles, shards of glass, v. sexy) and shook off the lumpies. "Someone soon-to-be-departed did! I've never seen the sodding thing before in my life!" He looked really bewildered underneath the homicidal fury.

It's really very interesting to go back and compare Early Barbverse Spike to Late Barbverse Spike in terms of what progress he makes (or doesn't make) in controlling his temper over the course of the series. Hopefully I make the progression believable.

"OK, where did you find it?" I asked. I didn't exactly want to say so, but it occurred to me that maybe Buffy had taped it without telling him. Buffy may play it all Sandra Dee on the outside, but on the inside? Pure Gypsy Rose Lee. She had to keep it all bottled up during The Angel Years, and during The Riley Years she had to be really careful not to break him, and now, well--Exhibit A, currently lying in ten zillion pieces on the floor. "Was the file just sitting on your hard drive, or...?"

Spike looked super-guilty all of a sudden. His head ducked down between his shoulders, vampire ninja turtle style. "Mighthaveclickedonalinksomethin'boutSlayers," he mumbled.

"In other words, you were surfing for Slayer porn?" I folded my arms and settled in for some primo foot-tapping. "Don't you get enough of that at home?"

The interesting thing about the Buffyverse is that the supernatural ISN'T really a secret. Tons of people know about it. It's just no one admits to knowing about it. Which makes my Buffy's job a lot easier when she decides to drag it out of the closet. Which is a roundabout way of saying, if you know where to look, of course there would be Slayer fetish websites.

"I was not! I just...happened on it, like, looking for something else!" Spike is the world's second worst liar (Willow is the winner and still champeen) and he could see I wasn't buying it. "And anyway, it's a bloody good thing I did! Christ knows how long that's been out there for any spotty little deviant with their mum's credit card number to--" His eyes went Inuyasha-huge as fresh horror overtook him. "How long has it been out there?"

Barbverse Dawn is a Sesshumaru fangirl for sure.

"I'm more worried about who the cameraman was," I said. Spiders walked up my spine for a second. "I mean, that was your bedroom, right?"

Two seconds later we burst in through the door of Mom's old room, now Buffy and Spike's House of Ill Repute. I dove for the closet and Spike ripped open the door of the big old mahogany wardrobe he'd dragged over from the crypt. (But he didn't go inside, because as everyone knows, it's very foolish to shut yourself inside a wardrobe.) I stared at the crush of cute tops and kicky boots, ooh, I bet Buffy won't miss this one, she hasn't worn it in weeks... "How many shoes does she OWN?" I pulled a box free and the whole Leaning Tower Of Gucci collapsed on me.

My fic is usually a game of Spot the Narnia Reference

"Stop larking about," Spike growled, grabbing my feebly waving hand and yanking me out of the sea of footwear. "By the angle it's got to be around here somewhere..." He did one of those effortless vampire leaps and chinned himself on the top of the wardrobe, peering over the facade of wooden curlicues on the top. "Got the bastard!" He snaked one arm over the rim and jerked something small and black free, and dropped back to the floor with a thump. "What the hell...?"

It was a tiny, palm-sized camera with a little antenna sticking out of the top. Witness the creepiness. "I'm freaking out here," I said, plopping down on the bed. "Someone actually broke into our house and hid that up there!"

Spike snarled and closed his fist, and the camera joined the monitor in Electronics Heaven before I could yell, "Wait, that's evidence!"

"Not any more, it's not."

"It could lead us back to whoever planted it," I said impatiently. "We could have woken Willow up and had her...I don't know, do something technical."

This is why Spike needs Dawn around. She's the criminal mastermind in the family.

"Point." Spike shoved his lower lip out and scowled. "If there's one, there may be more. In fact, there's got to be."

I blinked. "How can you tell?"

He looked guilty and embarrassed again. "Ah, well, you see, the web site said...

For a guy supposedly unable to feel remorse, Spike does guilty and embarrassed very well.

*****

"Oh, as they say, my God." Xander stared at the tiny repeating clip with sick fascination. "'The Hottest Slayer in a Century Meets The Coolest Vampire Ever, and Guess Who Gets Staked! Sizzling Action With Cold, Dead Seed!' And this is just the teaser. You can order a whole DVD, only $49.99. Hours of fun for the whole family."

I am pretty sure that Jonathan got Andrew to write that advertising copy.

"Well, I must say both of you have excellent technique," Anya said with an approving nod. "And Spike has a large and well-formed penis, though personally I prefer circumcised men. But I can certainly understand why you're upset if you're not getting your rightful share of the profits."

"Spike, could you cool it with the growly noises?" Willow asked, her fingers flying over the keyboard. "It's distracting. OK, there's definitely more cameras... six at least. The Magic Box, the skating rink, Spike's crypt...this one's dead... Directory, directory, who's got the root directory...hah! Xander, hand me that Unicode list."

I actually researched what all Willow would have had to do to hack into and take over the camera network. I've forgotten it all now, but for about five minutes there, my skilz were l33t.

"What I still don't get is why someone bothered to break into our house and plant cameras," I said from the opposite end of the dining room table. I was staying as far away from follow-the-bouncing-Buffy as possible. "Especially considering Spike would have ripped their heads off if he'd caught them, and Buffy would have gotten REALLY mean. If you want to make a sex film, why not just go over to one of the frat houses on campus and hire a couple of college students?"

"I hate to say it, Dawnie, but I don't think they were making a porn film." Xander tore himself away from Willow's laptop. "This is surveillance camera footage. Someone's been spying on Buffy, and the porn film is just a happy byproduct."

"But that doesn't make any sense," Willow muttered. She picked up one of the larger camera fragments with a pair of tweezers. "Look, it's all dusty, and the battery pack was dead. This hasn't worked for weeks, maybe months. Do we have any toner cartridges we could break open? I think we could use the toner as fingerprint powder, and if whoever installed these left any prints, and if Spike didn't smudge them all up with his macho camera-crushing..."

This was back when printer cartridges had loose toner in them.  I had just come off working for a place where we bough giant bags of loose toner and refilled our own cartridges because it was cheaper, and by God, that stuff got EVERYWHERE.

"Oh, right, blame the victim," Spike groused. "Christ, I need a fag." He stomped over to the kitchen door, and I got up and followed him out to the back porch, which was in shadow at this time of day. He lit a cigarette and stood there puffing furiously, all formal and stiff, and it weirded me out. I mean, Spike doesn't just walk or stand or sit. Spike struts and lounges and sprawls and tucks his thumbs in his belt all "Hi, I'm Spike, and this is my crotch!"

On the other hand, somewhere underneath Spike, Vampire Sex God, is still a guy who grew up when ankles were an erogenous zone. "Spike...are you OK?"

"Didn't want you to see that," he said at last. "Not right. Not proper."

He looked absolutely miserable. Any other time I'd have patted his shoulder, but I figured I'd better roll my eyes instead. I leaned against the side of the house, ultra-cool and sophisticated and untroubled by the certain knowledge of Naked Spike a mere two layers of cloth away. "It's OK. Honest. It's not like I've never seen a naked guy before--"

So in my verse, as in canon, Dawn had a crush on Spike. And she knows perfectly well that Spike's in love with her sister, and doesn't see her that way. And she loves her sister, and wants her to be happy, and she doesn't want to be (as she puts it in another story) "pathetic" about it. So she's tried very hard to squash her crush down and pretend it doesn't exist. But sometimes...

That was a mistake. Spike went yellow-eyed, achieving zero to over-protective in six seconds. "And just who the hell--"

"You and Xander, dope, when we all went skinny dipping after that clambake. Get your mind out of the gutter." Of course vague glimpses of guy-parts decently veiled by darkness and ice-cold seawater and didn't quite, uh, measure up to, well, let's just say I'm going to be comparing my future boyfriends to Spike in more ways than one, but you know, I wasn't going to let this be weird. Spike is a total hottie, and maybe, just maybe there have been a few daydreams. Detailed daydreams. With a sound track and special effects. But there are hotties all over the planet, and not all that many guys you can talk to about important stuff like whether or not you really existed before two years ago, and whether the monks that created you remembered to add a standard-issue soul to the mix, and how incredibly annoying older sisters can be. "On second thought, I'm deeply traumatized. I think I might get over it if you talked Buffy into letting me get my navel pierced."

Spike stared at me, various bits of him twitching. "Dawn--"

I patted his shoulder, because I could. "You're gonna be inhaling filter in a minute. Let's go inside."

When we got back inside, Willow had bit and pieces of camera wired up to the laptop. "Curiouser and curiouser," she said. "The server this camera was supposed to send information to doesn't exist any longer, or at least, it's not turned on. The web site's on a regular commercial server, and the domain name's registered to Horatio Hellpop--pseudonym much? Good news, it looks like the site's only been up for a couple of days--" She broke into a triumphant grin. "We're in!"

"What're you waiting for, then?" Spike doesn't usually use his sire-to-minion voice on Willow, but he was using it now. "Take it down!"

It's not relevant to the tale at hand, so I don't belabor it here, but this Willow is a vampire with a soul. It's a long story.

"Patience, Grasshopper." Willow typed a few more cryptic strings of symbols into the laptop. "Bad news, it's going to take me a few hours to find out who the owner really is. I'll have to hack into Paypal to get his bank account info and track IP addresses and stuff."

I did not research what it would take to hack into Paypal. I have my limits.

Spike began pacing back and forth, tense and borderline vampy, looking like he really, really wanted to kill something. Or someone. "And in that time this berk could run off a hundred more copies and pass 'em out to friends as door prizes."

"Or keep them and sell fifty-seven of them to the list of people I'm downloading now," Willow said. "OK. I've disabled the site and changed the passwords, so no one will be able to order any more." She cracked her knuckles. "Give me six hours and I can clean out Larry Flynt Junior's bank account, ruin his credit history, and send anonymous tips to Donald Rumsfeld that he's a terrorist child pornographer." Willow's a little less scary without her magic, but really? Not by that much. She looked around. "Not that I would ever do anything like that."

I mean really. "Hacker" may be a 90s cliche, but I still wouldn't want one mad at me.

Spike snatched the list of names and credit card numbers off the printer and squinted at it. "Bloody hell. There's addresses all the way from Juneau to Key West." He looked at the list again, and smiled. Need I say it wasn't a very nice smile? "I think it's time to pay a visit to the locals. Could be some of them have an idea who they're ordering from. Harris, you want to take out the rest of those cameras, and--" He turned to Willow. "Will, when Buffy gets home, for God's sake don't let her suss out anything's wrong. If she finds out about this..."

My Spike still needs glasses, but is too vain to wear them. I have a number of canonical justifications for this headcanon.

All of us shuddered in unison. If Buffy found out there would be an explosion of thermonuclear proportions. Spike grabbed his motorcycle jacket and blanket and headed for the front door, and I leaped to my feet and ran after him. "Wait up! I'm going with you!"

He scowled at me. "I think not. You're going to stay here, and distract your sister like a good little minor."

"Uh-uh." I used all of my hey-Dawnie's-tall-now height to advantage. "Look, Spike, all this stuff getting out does to you is make you mad. If Buffy finds out, she's going to be..." I floundered for a minute. " Humiliated, and nobody humiliates my sister except me. I'm gonna go with you, and we're gonna find out who did it and...and... kick their butts with pointy-toed shoes."

Spike glared, but it was the old I-disapprove-on-principle-but-you're-all-right,-Niblet glare, and I knew he'd be caving in ten, nine, eight... "Move yer girly arse, then," he said with an unconvincing growl. "We've got villains to apprehend."

I scooted for the DeSoto before he could change his mind. Maybe he thought that it would be a good idea to have someone soul-having around when he was this mad, just in case. Or maybe, and I really prefer this version, he just wanted a partner in crime because it's more fun that way. Spike flung the blanket over his head and copied my dash for the car, and we flung ourselves into the DeSoto's dark interior just as Spike was beginning to sizzle. "You come along, you mind what I tell you, yeah? I say stay in the car, you stay in the car. I say you run, you run. I say you take that fucking pathetic excuse for music out of the CD player and toss it out the window--"

"--and I ignore you like always," I said cheerfully, turning up the Jennifer Lopez.

"Fine. If anyone dies tonight, it's on your head. Some things are beyond any self-respecting vampire's endurance." Spike slammed into reverse and backed out of the driveway with a screech of tires. I grabbed the door handle. Driving with Spike is always a character-building experience, and today was no exception. "First on the hit parade?"

I scanned the list. "Vernon Blakely, 1583 East Beechwood. What are we gonna say to Mr. Blakely when we get there?"

Spike gazed out through the little clean space in the windshield, obviously pondering which limb he should rip off first, and peeled out like there was a mob with torches after us. "Improvisation is a virtue, Bit."

I had absolutely no idea how they would get the DVDs back. The next several scenes are just me letting the characters take the reins and do whatever the hell they wanted to.

**********

Spike was smoking gently beneath his blanket when the shade-deficient door of 1583 East Beechwood opened to our urgent hammering, and a middle-aged guy with thinning red hair and freckles and a pot belly opened it and blinked at us. He looked like Mr. Weasley gone to seed. "Mr. Blakely?" I said with my brightest, shiniest smile.

The Blakely looked from me to Spike, and the contrast seemed to produce some kind of cognitive dissonance on his part. "Can I... have we met?"

"Only in spirit." Spike leaned heavily against the doorframe, with a smile that was probably supposed to be reassuring, but which made him look like he was sporting fangs even when he wasn't. Spike isn't a big guy--in fact, he's on the smallish side, but he's got, you know, muscles. And this air of being able to rip your liver out. Also did I mention the muscles? "I'm given to understand you made a purchase recently from...ah..." He glanced surreptitiously at the paper in his hand. "...Mad Genius Productions?"

Mr. Blakely looked at me, dubious, and at Spike, nervous. "What of it? If I'd done anything like that, which I didn't."

"We're from the, uh, department of quality control," I chirped. "The DVDs are..."

"Radioactive," Spike put in. "Rot your goolies off just like that. " I gave him an elbow-jab.

"Defective," I said firmly. "Glitches. Pixelization. It's criminal the kind of shoddy merchandise we put out. We're recalling them and giving you a replacement at absolutely no charge!"

Spike held up a jewel case and flashed it under Blakely's nose. "Director's cut. Added scenes. 40% more filth for the price."

Suspicion was gathering in Mr. Blakely's watery blue eyes. "Hey, you're that guy from the video," he said.

Spike heaved a melodramatic sigh. "All right, all right, as you've twisted my arm, I'll autograph it for you."

I honestly did not expect him to say that, but somehow there I was, typing it.

The watery eyes brightened. "Really?"

Five minutes later we were dashing for the car again, with the confused Mr. Blakely waving us goodbye. "So what's he going to do when he discovers he's been suckered for a bootleg copy of J-Lo's latest?" I asked, as we tore away from the curb.

"Long as it's got some bint with her tits hanging out on the cover, I doubt he'll notice the difference." Spike grinned. "There'd just better be some hitting involved in the next one."

**********

"I don't believe there's any such thing as a Department of Quality Control," Mr. Angusson said, looking us up and down. "What the hell kind of scam are you pulling?"

"All we want to do is to replace--" I started.

"Look, missy, I bought that DVD nice and legal, and I don't give a crap if whatever goombah and his girlfriend put on plastic fangs to do it is having second thoughts now. So you and your boyfriend just toddle off and--"

"HEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPP!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "HE'S SHOWING ME HIS THING! IT'S ALL GROSS AND PURPLE AND--"

I didn't expect Dawn to do that, either. And yet!

Angusson disappeared and reappeared in two seconds flat, chucking the DVD at our heads.

"Better," Spike said as we tore out yet again. "But I'm still feeling a lack in the hitting things area."

Mr. Fishbein retreated a step from the threshold. "I'm not giving you anything, and I'm not letting you in," he quavered. "What do you think I am, stupid? You're a vampire!"

Honestly, it's Sunnydale. SOMEONE has to get it.

Spike rolled his eyes. He's learned from the masters. "Oh, bollocks, you don't really believe--"

"Oh, yeah?" Fishbein challenged. "Step through that door!"

I stepped through the door, grabbed Fishbein's hand and gave him a good hard yank, right across the threshold and into Spike's waiting fist.

"What was that?," Spike caroled, drawing back for another punch. "Come on in and have a cuppa, Spike? Better repeat it, I'm a touch deaf in that ear."

"That was unnecessarily bloody," I said as we hopped into the car and stepped on the gas, one DVD richer.

"He'll live," Spike said dismissively. "Probably. Next?"

**********

I figured I had to give Spike SOME violence, or he'd get mopey.

"Can you see--?" I hissed, trying to get a better view through the front window. It was getting dark, and I was out of practice at sneaking around not-really-abandoned buildings. Spike shushed me and crept around to the door. I peered through the sad straggly thevetia hedge, cupping my hands against the dirty glass. The place was just crawling with innnnnnteresting monsters, all huddled around a crappy old black and white TV. There's some law against demons watching flatscreen color, apparently.

"Oh, my God, are they really...you know....doing it?" The Gorthesch demon bumped a couple of Fyarls further down on the couch and plunged a scaly paw into the bowl of popcorn as they all stared at the flickering screen. "With a Slayer? I mean, I heard about it, but I didn't think even a vampire could sink that low."

"Real vampires don't," the lone vampire in the crowd protested, voice dripping disgust. "Maybe great big Slayer-whipped pussies do, but--"

"Shut up!" came a chorus of squeaky, growly, and croaky voices. Despite the complaints, everyone seemed to like the show. There were tongues hanging out. At least, I hope they were tongues.

"Yeah, it's just gettin' to the good part," a Syvithis demon whispered.

"Oooh! The one with the pommel horse?"

"No, where the Slayer goes down on him in the graveyard and he--"

I actually wrote a PWP detailing all the scenes in The Spuffy Sex Tape. An edited-down version eventually got incorporated into A Parliament of Monsters, when Angelus gets a hold of one of the copies that Spike and Dawn aren't able to track down in this story.

The front door imploded with a crash, splinters flying everywhere, and Spike strode into the room over the wreckage, a gleam in his eye and a really, really big axe slung over one shoulder. He surveyed the assortment of demons with a grin almost as big as the axe and about twice as vicious, ran his tongue over his teeth and and tucked his free thumb in his belt loop, fingers splayed over the merchandise. Just like old times. "Looks like you're right, mate," he said. "We are just getting to the good part."

**********

"OK, I take it back," I said as we headed for home. "THAT was unnecessarily bloody." It was after midnight, and we'd collected twenty-two DVDs, broken and entered fifteen houses and/or lairs, killed or maimed eight demons, broken five human fingers accidentally-on-purpose, and signed two autographs. Spike had definitely achieved his hitting things quota, and it was a safe bet that no one in Sunnydale would be mentioning Spike and Buffy's brief but eventful movie career in public any time soon.

"All right, p'raps the railroad spike was a bit much, but a bloke gets nostalgic." Spike stretched, all luxurious and satisfied, and lit up a fresh cig, trailing smoke out the window. He had a black eye and a split lip and a scrape right across the place where his cheekbone goes all knife-edgy, and the stretching made things creak inside that probably weren't supposed to creak, but he was in a much, much better mood. "He'll grow a new head."

Where did Spike get a railroad spike on short notice? I have no idea. He's just resourceful that way.

"If you say so," I said, a bit dubious. "Doesn't that only happen when you cut the old one off?"

"So it'll take a bit longer." Spike bounced a little in his seat, all hepped up on the old ultra-violence. "Still haven't found the bastard who's selling the things, though. Must be a bleeding criminal mastermind if--" I Wanna Be Sedated beebled from the cell phone in his pocket. (Like I said, a lot better with technology than some vampires I can name. He can even program it, though considering the songs he picks, sometimes we wish he couldn't.) He grabbed the phone one-handed and didn't slow down even a bit as he zipped through freeway traffic. (Well, he is evil.) "Yeh? You must be joking. You must be--fuck. That little--I'll tear his soddin' head off! Yeh, I know. I'll just bruise him a little." He clicked the phone off and stuffed it back in his pocket, spun the wheel and zigged across four lanes of traffic towards the off-ramp, leaving a chorus of screeching brakes behind us. "After I tear his soddin' head off."

"Where are we going?" I yelled.

Spike hunched over the wheel, eyes grim. "Off to see the wizard."

We pulled up in front of one of the cruddy lease-by-the-month apartment buildings over by the UC Sunnydale campus. Maybe it was the same one Dad and I stayed at when he came down from L.A. to take care of Buffy's estate that time she was dead--the second time, I mean, not the first time. Some of the grease spots in the parking lot looked familiar.

It just struck me as I was describing the building that it was almost identical to the one I'd described in Necessary Evils, so I thought I'd better lampshade it.

"Apartment 42B, Will says." Spike sucked in his cheeks and narrowed his eyes, scoping out the disintegrating stucco overhead. "There at the end." He slapped his hands together and bounded towards the stairs like he was scaling Everest. I followed like I was scaling a rickety stepladder. (Hey, lack of supernatural stamina here. I was getting pretty darned tired.) The lights were on in 42B, and we paused outside the door, which was painted in barf-making 80s turquoise. Spike pounded on it with one fist. "Open up! Land shark!"

I heard some rustling and thumping noises inside, and a crash like a bookcase falling over. "Go away!" a strangely familiar voice yelled. "You can't get in here anyway!"

"Yeh? Maybe not, but I can stand out here till you starve to death. Or set the building on fire, or...uh..." Spike paced the catwalk for a second, smoking like a fiend, which I guess is appropriate. I was pretty sure the fire thing was a bluff, since Spike's not usually one for indirect mayhem. He's got the whole hitting things fetish, after all. Then his eyes lit up and he grinned. "Maybe I can't walk through your door, but there's nothing says I can't kick it down and send in my terrible mute minion, Paco." He whirled around and unleashed one of his shitkicker boots at the door. BANG! The whole building shuddered (which sounds impressive, but considering it was probably made out of pressboard and Kleenex, isn't so much). WHAM! A hinge sprung and the doorframe cracked. I buffed my nails and waited--obviously Spike was holding back.

I don't know why more vampires don't do things like this.

"I'm gonna lose my deposit!" the voice inside wailed.

"My heart bleeds. Oh, wait, no it doesn't. Open up, or--"

The door flew open, or tried to (Spike had knocked it kind of cattywompus, and it stuck halfway.) A face peered out, pale and pear-shaped and nervous under slept-in dark hair. Behind it was a barren little studio apartment littered with pizza boxes, comic books, and boxes of DVDs and padded mailers. There was practically no furniture except a mattress and a desk with a pretty sweet computer and home studio setup.

My hand shot out and I grabbed Pasty-face by the ear and pulled, hard. "Jonathan?!" I yipped. Jonathan squirmed and batted at me, but I dug my nails in. "YOU'RE the criminal mastermind?"

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!" he yelled. "Let me go, don't let him kill me, I didn't mean to, it's not my fault!"

"Oh, for God's sake, quit whining," I snapped, letting go. "Spike hasn't even touched you."

Spike took a drag on his cigarette, peeled himself off the railing and sort of glided over, all slouchy and menacing, with the angle of the floodlights leaving black caverns where his eyes should be. Jonathan squinched in on himself. "You just don't learn, do you?" Spike asked, soft and pee-your-pants scary. "How long've you had those cameras on us?"

Jonathan backed away with a panicky shuffle. "They're not mine! They were Warren's, and they haven't worked since the police confiscated all his computer stuff! Honest! I just happened to have some files I'd saved for, for--"

"Wanking material?" Spike asked, excessively sarcastic.

"Research!" Jonathan reached the wall and sat down very abruptly. "I didn't mean anything by it! All I wanted was to raise some money so Warren and Andrew could get a better lawyer! Someone who knows about demon-related cases, like Goldberg & Osbourne, or Wolfram & Hart. I didn't think you'd ever find out, and I'm really, really, really sorry, please don't kill me, please, please, PLEASE don't kill me--"

Goldberg & Osbourne is a real law firm in Phoenix, AZ, known for being sleazy ambulance-chasers. A joke that only I ever got.

"Didn't mean anything by dragging a lady's reputation in the dirt?" Spike roared (and again, by roared, I mean, well, roared). He grabbed Jonathan by his Robotech jammies and hauled him up nose-to-nose--Jonathan's one of the few guys Spike can look down on. "Well, maybe I won't mean anything when I rip your balls off and stuff them in your eye sockets, how's that?"

"Why?" I asked, grabbing Spike's arm. I realized I'd been wanting to ask that question for a long time. "Why, Jonathan? I mean, I get Warren and whatsisface--they had grudges against Buffy, but you used to be--" Well, not her friend, not really. "She saved your life! You gave her the Class Protector award! She let you off the hook when she turned Warren over to the cops--you were an accessory to murder, Jonathan, and she let you go! I don't get it. Why are you helping them?"

Jonathan yanked his pajama top out of Spike's grip and pulled himself up like he'd taken a dose of Insta-Spine. "Because they're my friends," he said, very simply, meeting Spike's yellowing eyes head-on. "And I know they're not much, but they're all I've got. Whatever else happens, you've got to stand by your friends, right? Or what's the point?" He sighed, squared his shoulders, and looked up at Spike with a little smile. "It's a fair cop. I guess you'd better do whatever it is you're going to do."

I wanted Jonathan to redeem himself a little bit, kinda?

Spike stood there looking at Jonathan, head cocked in the His Master's Voice pose he gets when he's trying really, really hard to figure out the motivations of the souled. And I knew what was going through his head. Spike was looking for a reason not to kill him.

See, Spike doesn't have a soul. He doesn't do good stuff because it's right. He can't. He's not wired that way, as he puts it. But he can do good stuff if there's a reason--like if it helps him somehow, or makes someone he loves happy. Or if it makes him feel, for a minute, like he's a man and not a monster, which is a feeling he really likes. And that's the cool thing about Spike, the thing I really love about him, and I think probably the thing Buffy loves too: not the cheekbones or the attitude or the mad combat skilz or what's under those jeans, but that he does like that feeling, and so Spike looks for those reasons. Looks real hard. Harder, I think sometimes, than some people with souls.

I'm just sayin'.

"Right," he said at last. And he hauled off and punched Jonathan right in the nose.

"YEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOW!" Jonathan fell over, clutching his face, and gore splattered everywhere. "By dose! You broge by dose!"

But still, well, evil.

"Just be glad that's all I've broke," Spike said. He wiped his knuckles on his t-shirt instead of licking the blood off, which was a pretty big compliment, really. Congratulations, Jonathan, you've graduated to Not-Food! "Christ, where's the fun in beating the shit out of a pathetic little wibbling sod like you?" He pulled a handkerchief out of his jacket pocket (that's another moderately cool thing about Spike: he carries pocket handkerchiefs) and tossed it to Jonathan. "Grab the goods, Bit. It's time to call it a night."

Jonathan sat there snorfling blood into the hanky while I ferried the DVDs and Jonathan's hard drive out to Spike--I figured Willow could check it out for contraband and return it, so we weren't stealing it exactly. As we started down the stairs with the last armload, Spike turned back to Jonathan, almost amiable. "Word to the wise. I don't forget what your friends put Buffy through. If you want to do your pals a real favor, maybe you ought to remember that while I'm out here, and they're safe in stir, no one's likely to get eaten accidental-like, eh?"

Now this! At the time that I wrote this, I had NO IDEA that Warren would come back and cause trouble later, and that Spike would, in fact, end up eating him. Indeed, by the time I wrote "The Lesser of Two Evils," I had completely forgotten that I'd written this line, and when I stumbled upon it when re-reading a couple of years later, it was this totally serendipitous piece of foreshadowing. Sometimes writing is so cool!

Jonathan stared at him, and nodded a little. And we left.

**********

It was past two o'clock when we got home. We locked the DVDs in the trunk of the DeSoto, which had been the closet for a lot of other skeletons in its day, and after a short consultation on how to best avoid Ordeal By Buffy, we strolled into the house as if we were coming in from a late patrol and nothing in the universe was wrong.

Willow was still tapping away at her laptop in the dining room. "I'm just tracking down the copies on eBay," she whispered, "and sending out fake cease and desist orders from Mad Genius Productions. Buffy's in bed. She doesn't suspect a thing." She noted our alarmed glances and added, a bit huffily, "Don't worry, Xander took care of the the subterfuge part. Did you get him?"

"Yeh, he's got." Spike rolled his head and rubbed back of his neck. "Battle of the ages. Christ, I'm glad that's done with." He eyed our crumpled list of victims thoughtfully. "Wonder if I could fake a business trip to Juneau."

"Don't press your luck," Willow said drily.

"Someday I'm going to sire someone with a minimum of respect for their elders," Spike growled.

Willow grinned, smug. "And they'll bore you so much you'll stake them inside forty-eight hours. Shoo. Buffy's waiting for you."

So we headed for the stairs, and as I put my foot on the first step, I heard Spike heave a big sigh behind me. "Thanks, Bit. Couldn't have managed without you." When I looked back, he was staring at the toes of his boots, all awkward and embarrassed. "I just hope this hasn't... hasn't..."

"Spike, I'll always think of you as my brother." I waited two beats, and added with a perfectly straight face, "My brother with the enormous schlong."

I got three whole steps before Spike came after me and chased me all the way upstairs.

This story is the second of three I wrote ("The Road to Byzantium" and "A Dark and Stormy Night" are numbers one and three) which has Dawn moving on from her crush and into a more grown-up friendship with Spike as a major theme, and hopefully it works. And they all lived happily ever after, at least until I got another idea!

[forgetmenotsandroses]

The Now

Carry On Countdown: WLW

Summary: Trixie and Keris are huge canonical lesbians thank u for coming to my ted talk.

Dedicated to @slightlystalesushirolls ily💕

•••

Trixie laughs way too hard at Keris’ jokes and hates herself for it. Even though pixie laughs sound like tinkling bells, Trixie’s human mother ensures that hers is more akin to a braying donkey than delicate silver. But Trixie is trying so hard to be delicate. And pretty and sweet and soft. Because Keris seems like she might be into the whole femme thing. Most butch girls aren’t looking for a super androgynous mate, right?

So Trixie tries. Again and again. How can she be more perfect, more appealing? She tries to be more masc, adopting flannels and working out and ever-so-slightly changing the way she talks. It doesn’t work. She tries high femme, goes a solid month wearing only pastel shades, tries jewellery and flowers, spelling her hair rainbow colours to send a message. Nothing seems to work. Keris shows no interest at all, save sputtering at the table the first time she shows up to the breakfast table the first time with her newly-spelled hair, wearing a skirt shorter than dress code will allow and the lowest-cut blazer in all of England over a bralette. But Trixie’s pretty sure she was just laughing at the pathetic attempts to be attractive for once. Even her snobbish roommate notices her state of misery, and leaves her alone for a full two days after that one.

Despite botched romantic efforts, Trixie and Keris do become friends. Best friends, even. Their personalities are too compatible for them not to be, both so snarky and spontaneous that even their other friends tire of being around them. And this is part of the problem. Being best friends means that Trixie is in close proximity with the girl of her dreams all the fucking time. Which is great, in theory. But the longing and loneliness and stupid wishes to kiss Keris until both their lips turn blue put a strain on Trixie’s brain. It threatens to stay that way, for a whole half year, before more drama happens.

The chosen one runs off to slay dragon or whatever (Trixie personally didn’t think Simon had it in him, doesn’t he like to hang out with the nice goat lady and stuff? And she’s pretty sure dragons are an endangered species or something). Anyways, the school is plunged into chaos. Again. This time, though, there’s a slight difference. Keris is shivering, arms wrapped around Trixie, and they’re completely alone in the catacombs.

“Keris?” Trixie whispers, “Are you okay?”

Keris glares. “No! The school is under attack again, my face is fucking bleeding, and we’re hiding in what is probably the most structurally unsound place in this school! Why does Watford even have catacombs in the first place?”

Oh. Trixie’s embarrassed, which has been happening a lot lately. But also freaked out a little, because there’s a lot of blood coming from Keris’ forehead and how did she not notice that before?

“Your forehead is bleeding, like, a lot.”

Keris grimaces. “Thanks for pointing that out, genius.”

“Wait! That wasn’t what I meant! I just… There might be something I can do about that?” Trixie stutters her way through the sentence. Because this isn’t just a normal healing.

“What can you do? We haven’t gotten onto flesh mending spells yet, and I’m not in the mood to have you experiment on me.”

“No, not that. I mean, um. Pixies can heal things with kisses. And sometimes I can too. But it only works if—”

“Oh! I mean, if it’s alright with you…” This is awkward, and not least because Keris has cut Trixie off at a crucial rule of healing. To heal, you have to be in love with the person. Deeply in love. Which is why her father’s kisses can mend her mother’s broken bones, but do nothing for her. Not that her halfbreed magic is strong enough for healing bones. But superficial cuts and bruises she can do.

“It’s alright with me.” Trixie manages a nervous smile. It’s not like a kiss on the forehead means anything anyways. It’s not like her heart is pounding through her skull. It’s not like her mind is begging her to open her mouth and say something, tell Keris the truth. Instead, she gently, gently places a kiss directly over the open cut on Keris’ head, and watches it seal back up.

Keris grins, bright enough to blind Trixie (not that it doesn’t blind her every time already). “Thanks! I haven’t felt magic like that before! It got all hot and tingly and I felt my skin seal back together and—“

“Can I kiss you?” Trixie cuts her off.

“What?”

Trixie continues, panicking. “I mean. On the mouth. It’s totally okay if you don’t want me to, I mean I’m sure I wouldn’t want to kiss me either but it just seemed like the right moment and I’m panicking right now because I love our friendship but I can’t live like this anymore I’ve tried so hard to get you to notice me like that and you never seem to care which is cool but I figured you deserved to know, y’know? And I just, I mean. I just think that. I guess…”

“Trixie, I—“

“Keris, I love you, and if I have to go another day without saying something it might kill me.”

Trixie opens her mouth again, only to be cut off with the sensation of Keris smashing her lips to her mouth. It’s not entirely pleasant, but not unpleasant either. As first kisses go, it’s pretty good, actually. They make out for a good half hour against the walls of the catacombs, which is metal and romantic and weird and kind of perfect. Just like them. Later, Keris will tell Trixie everything she noticed. Later, Trixie will properly ask to be her girlfriend. But that’s the future. This is the now.

[demonslayvr]

VERSES RUNDOWN.

'fore blazing home came atumbling  ;  there was a family of four  (  childhood v. )

PRE GAMES  /  NOVEL’S  /  MANGA’s.   pretty clear  --  this is any interaction that has been plotted or otherwise during dante’s childhood til the fire.  by default he’s going to be about 6 - 8 years of age with the latter age at least a couple months before the fire.  

quite indeterminate yet the bang of a gun and the slash of a sword still remain a constant ( undetermined v  )

PRETTY OBVIOUS.   i haven’t made a decision where shit goes yet thus its undetermined.  will change during thread once we plot more on it or i figure something out myself.

not everything has a simple ending.  crashing demons is easy but other things ? that can be tough  (  multifandom v  )

GENERAL CROSSOVER / MULTIVERSE v.   pretty generic verse for when either dante himself or another character   outside   of the devil may cry canon gets tossed comes inside it.  i’ll probably branch off if and whenever i make verses for  in - fandom specific  threads when i build something for each one of them but this is it for now.  sometimes this verse tag will accompany another one  ;  which just means whichever verse he’s in and what you should follow development wise is connected. basically just a multi - fandom tag for crossover threads,  lads.   

die trash man  ;  take your sword and SHOVE IT  ( crack  )

GENERAL CRACK.   as the package says it’s just a verse / tag for crack whenever it happens.  sometimes it may 

a flash to a past that holds bitter air.  pain was a story here.  you wish not to go back   ( post dmc5 / alternate interaction v )

ALTERNATE INTERACTIONS.   pretty much like with the multifandom verse tag this one is simply going to go with   any   other version of himself dante interacts with.  might get latched onto with another verse tag just for my own sanity but  . .  yep.

low feelings  ;  simply moving along to find dangers and distractions ( devil may cry one v. ) 

SET JUST BEFORE,  DURING OR AFTER DMC1 AND BEFORE FOUR.  pretty much as the previous sentence says lads.  he’s an angstee boy but not as angsty as his two self i guess lmao.  but yeah,  this verse is a huge back track in terms of development and how he is in the verse   below  this one.

bang bang bang kiss of the gun & blade ; where are we?  (  post dmc5 - main )

POST DMCV.   follows the full OG dmcv canon til end  -  depending on interaction this could mean that any vergil written with and dante are in hell still doing whatever the fuck they please   or   after the fact and home and going on with their lives.  or trying  ;  considering vergil is back in his life and alive.  this is also the   DEFAULT   verse of the blog.

there's a fire in your veins that speaks your losses yet you continue to bend in remembrance (  atla / lok v.  )

SHUNNED.   known for killing his twin brother,  his very name and even more so in taking jobs to pay the bills   --  jobs that more so upset the delicate balance between the human and spirit realms.  

dante sparda   comes from the fire nation  -- his father a previous high general in the army  ; one that tried to broker peace in a time where it was unheard of while the fire nation ruled. his father met eva when he was traveling the earth nation and secretly begun a relationship with her.  their love was beautiful,  eventually in as much secret as possible eva bore two young boys:  vergil and dante sparda.

happiness was not to last however as wind was caught of the affair and the children,  leaving eva and the young sons to go on the run with sparda defending their escape.  the name sparda was drug through the mud as the man was never heard from again after that night. unknown what became of him as deflected firebending set the house ablaze.

short years pass,  spending it on the run from those who want to end the chapter of embarrassment  --  but it finally catches up.  one evening eva comes running,  telling her boys to go  --  to run and hide.  forget their names but stay at each other’s side.  the twins do as told and don’t look back  ;   the last time they see her.  however in their escape they end up separated,  captured by soldiers of the fire nation.  dante’s anger and despair of losing his entire family causes him to lose control  ;  lashing out on the soldiers that caught him and running away

“ you must change your name  ;  forget your past and start a new life as someone else.  “

that he does.  he changes his name and disappears,  alone.  fast forwarding a couple years he’s a spirit hunter  ;  taking jobs that rid   “  evil spirits  “  that cause issue or problem for anyone that pays a good amount.  a mercenary that cuts down those who’ve wronged the wrong person  ;  non and bender’s alike.  his father’s sword,  rebellion,  at his back to assist and create a dancing display of fire just as much as his bending.  he’s a difficult one to get close to but once you cool him off   (   haha )  he’s a loyal friend and ally.  

with the war over at the end of the series he’s more vocal of who he is  --  even though he was  previously   but with some of the fire nation’s  “ norms  “  kind of relaxing from fire - lord zuko’s rule   . .  he’s his father’s son.  his mother’s son.

lok  verses are basically  . .  kinda the same.  except i guess he’s older   . .  ??

pay off the debt to save your skin  ;  something within broke and former gentle soul crushed under weight ( dmc 2.0 v )

CANON DIVERGENT.  dante snapped,   perhaps it was inevitable  -  perhaps losing too many people tore what little the cambian could handle to pieces and the person that emerged from it was more a threat than he was before.  after the events of devil may cry 1 after realizing that he had  ( supposedly   )  killed his brother there was something in him that couldn’t handle it and everything begun to crumble.

in this timeline something in him changed, and while it wasn’t immediate  –  little things when he would have been understanding over a situation didn’t sit as they should.  but it happened quickly.  with trish’s betrayal he didn’t help her,  allowing her to get crushed by the tumbling rocks  ;  simply standing there and watch it happen.  its drawn out,  with him coming over to crouch beside her as she struggled to heal.  in his allowance bore cruelty,  snarling that she should have known better to betray him  –  mundus shouldn’t have done what he did and expect him to now not try and go after him.

he,  as he does in the normal timeline,  states that while she looks like his mother that she has no soul,  no fire and for that she’s just a puppet.  he shoots her more than once,  killing her   –   the last time he sheds a tear.  he reaches mundus,  who commends him for his actions yet the hybrid isn’t having it.  the fight with mundus goes about the same but with dante  killing him   for ultimately forcing him to murder his brother,  being the one who set the orders to   burn down   his home  –  twice   –  and turn his life upside down.

he goes through the portal mundus opened to  try   and escape and ultimately assumes himself as the  new king  of the underworld.  he still runs his business since even though he’s king there will always be factions that don’t   like it   due to his bastard blood and he’s more than happy to snuff it out.

his attitude is   mostly   intact   (  though this is said   loosely   since he’s less talkative and jovial   )   though now it’s unsettling at times since his jokes and humor can be a bit morbid  – let alone how his aura feels.  its dangerous and uncomfortable to be around  ;  his care for humans as a whole is almost non - existent except for a small inkling for lady.  

BIG NOTE:  THIS TIMELINE IS SET AFTER DEVIL MAY CRY ONE,  KIND OF   SKIPS FOUR    (    though it   IS   likely nero still exists but dante doesn’t care much about it  or know   )    SLIGHTLY INVOLVES TWO    ( aka:  dante gets annoyed that some idiot human is making helicopters messed up with demonic juju and wants to become king.  so he kills arius  )  AND INVOLVES   SOME CONTENT   OF FIVE.  

to enact your revenge most had been taken  ;  body & mind broken so it could begin   (  witcher v  )

———–   destiny.  you hear it more than you’d like to admit.  destiny is what brought your parents together  ;   one monster and the other a witch.  two were born,  twins and raised in care by the witch til fate came to pass and ripped the three of you left apart.  in trying to halt destiny the father,  sparda,  had done his best to hold it off  ;  disappearing one afternoon when the boys had been young   ��—–   so long ago.  his hope ??   that staying away would bring a kinder reality and future.

fire and blood,  a mother doing best to protect her children was found disemboweled on the floor within the crumbled castle foundations.  the youngest child was told to hide,  hide away and if the mother didn’t resurface   . .  to run.  she didn’t,  but the youngest fought his way out of the castle   —-  skills of his mother surfacing with an aptitude for beast slaying in the same scope.  his father’s sword,  created by hellish and beastly means was his and aptly used to start a revenge   —  to   KILL   demons in his mothers name.  and in his brothers   —   as both were believed to have perished in the attack.

in a short time and with training the young hybrid killed demons for a price   ;   eventually catching the eye of a witcher.  the nature of the hybrid himself and the skills he held were of interest   —   brought to kaer morhen to be trained as a witcher.  almost losing himself in the process yet he endured,  it further altering his physiology that was already different with the hybrid nature he had.

with the trials and effective torture to   be   a witcher an astounding success he buried into the extensive training to pursue the beast that slayed his family while also being a monsterslayer for hire.  

———���   destiny.  you hear it more than you’d like to admit.   destiny and fate has brought you here.  brought you a thought lost ache in your heart for the family lost all to avenge them and   kill   the beast that killed   them.   you feign your disinterest,  your lack of care but there is much of it in soul.   destiny   is a cruel mistress,  son of sparda.  yet perhaps she may gift you the   KINDNESS   to provide retribution if you are to   live   long enough.

Notes 1:    with his father’s blood and how he is part beast,  his body temperature is more abnormally hot than normal  –  able to reach just below lava temperatures without it seeming to create any problems for him.   Notes 2:   his magic is mostly fire based,  secondly offensive  (   akin to geralt’s in show how it can push things back,  etc  ).  with the fire being used to distract he’s referenced to a dragon at times which he ignores. Notes 3:   dante’s still trans because i say so   ;   while magic used to be used to help him pass he’s since has procedure through coin to get effectively top surgery  —  the scars easy to pass off due to his occupation.  bottom surgery hasn’t been attempted but with becoming a witcher,  like the rest,  he’s infertile. Notes 4.    he’s   school of the wolf   because i said so,  wolves are cool and it has geralt so sue me  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

you wished you could forget ; everything else seems to blur but not him. not the brother you lost. (  IT v.  )

AFTER THE FIRE  you found yourself in foster care with your brother in tow. foster turned into adoption with the family that adopted the two siblings ended up bringing the two of them too derry,  maine.  immediately the youngest sibling knew something was off about the town  ;  the atmosphere unsettling but kept it to himself,  not wanting to blow the change he had with his brother at having a new life.  (   he and vergil are still cambion’s,  but their power is,  like,  kinda not as Large as it is normally.  still half demons tho folks.   )

the youngest had trouble settling in a new town,  smaller than the last  –   economically  (  as he and his twin were upper class before this )   and town size in general with more seeming conservative values.  he was lucky to find himself in a slightly liberal and understanding household as he was a transgender kid who no one knew any less of. something he was more careful to keep to himself.

everything was fine,  the brothers settled in and all was well until it wasn’t.  exploring the woods and the barrens  –  finally opening up to his brother that things were strange in the town and he could feel something off.  they went looking but in doing so  . .  there had been an opening of weakness for the two  –  distractions and a trap.  their mother,  burned and in pain asking for their help  ;  of course the two came closer.  there was a small difference in this faux recreation and trauma that dante noticed  –  calling out for his brother to stay away but,  unfortunately the youngest saw the eldest fall victim to the trap  –  terrified and running away when he couldn’t do anything but possibly fall victim too.

time passed,  school continued on with whispers and comments on how the twin had probably did it himself,  causing the kid to isolate himself from everyone even though he knew what he say.  adults didn’t believe him but there was a group that seemed to have had a run in with this   . .  fuckin’ clown.  

(   going off:  smol™ dante getting involved with the losers after he straight up talks to one of them about what happened and what he saw  /  big™ dante having gone off like the rest of the losers doing his own thing aka kill other demon / eldritch things as normal kinda sorta and then re - meet up with them  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

same person but different mistakes  ;  still wrought pain upon brothers ( altered outcome / divergent v. )

CANON DMC DIVERGENT.   pretty much a what if  /  reversal if dante led the life vergil did instead of vergil himself.  it’s pretty much the same events but with dante the cause of them or involved instead of vergil.  his attitude is close to what 2.0 dante is but not entirely there in terms of destruction.  however he is still trying to deal with the aftermath of nelo angelo fame and dmcv’s whole thing.

ARISE ;  for you are reborn into something greater.   ARISE    baricontralto angelo - fight.  ( post dmc 5 div. nelo angelo dante v  )

HE HAD BEEN COCKY. the cambion had been cocky upon returning back with his twin from the underworld   ;   cocky that with his twin that nobody could beat them if they simply worked together.  and he was right.  he was right up until he was wrong and time,  well  . . time wasn’t kind.    it had been nine months   since their return from the underworld from cutting down the qliphoth and in that time a   familiar blue amulet   found itself back in dante’s possession.  it had been lost for several decades,  having been lost to the boy during the day he had come home to find gavreel and the family slaughtered on the lawn.

he kept it close,  he knew the meaning   –  he knew that there was   peace   again but  .  . he knew the danger of once again having this but would not dare get rid of it   –  he’d ride the coaster until it stopped.  he’d be happy to have this shred of happiness and he felt he was finally allowed to have something   –   happy to have his brother back and have some semblance of family.

that was,  well,  until he   lost   the amulet.  he didn’t notice that he did,  believing it was still in pocket during a small run in with demons  ;  a job that he had taken alone   –  it seemed that fate was playing her hand that day.   it had been dropped during an evasion and was lost upon his shift ahead   –  he didn’t even spot it.  the job became less easy,  it tiring him considerably as the  small group   of demons became larger   –   and while it was initially a challenge   . .

it soon became taxing.  as the larger the numbers the more exhausted the demon hunter became,  the more he started to slip up.

it was only then did he realize that this was no job.  it was a   trap   and he was caught in a net he couldn’t tear himself from.  a familiar feeling emerged,  one he   hadn’t felt   for decades.  a demonic force that he had thrown fury at that same time.  he hadn’t been this week before.  he knew who this was and   . .   he was in trouble.  this trap had been calculated and he had fallen into it hook,  line and sinker.

the distraction of the feeling,  of the demonic energy rising in the space leaves him vulnerable  –  attacks slicing at his back,  his arms and legs   –   a lucky slash to his throat leaves him struggling and gripping his throat.   he hits his knees before he realizes he does  ; he ultimately   —   unintentionally   —   bows    to the demon king before he passes out, demonic weapons and claws slashing into his back.

the next   redacted years   in the demon world are a nightmare that  post   angelo dante would have trouble remembering for all that happened are buried deep in repressed memories.  the years blur together,  but dante holds for a long time  –  dante suffers,  he burns,  he aches,  he struggles    –   he perseveres.  for a time anyway.   he recalls and holds onto the trade out  . .  that this could have been   vergil   here instead of he.  last minute changes,  bouts of laughter as he accepted the job and ran out the door.  

see you soon   he had said.  but the jovial air had long past.  memories begin to muddle,  to ebb and fade in and out as things became foggy.  a struggle to remember  –   a struggle to fight but   . .   not all fights can be won.  this one eventually was lost.

out of years of torturous pain and bloodshed arose a new pet,  a puppet that was loyal and true.  one that slaughtered doppelganger after doppelganger of brother and self,  of friends and allies that the king knew that the former knew.  he was satisfied that his little puppet would do just fine.  that perhaps he could lure in his old   ;   have the complete set  –  for use of the younger did fine in breaking the elder.

this soldier has two forms  ;  one that fed to his devil trigger (   generic nelo angelo  –  not much power is used for it  –  basically it’s dante on the regular tapping into demonic power with his first devil trigger.  he’s stronger than normal,  having given into his addiction to human and demon blood and grown more powerful because of it  )  

and another that feeds into his   sin   devil trigger  (  essentially the  ‘  dragon  ‘  -  esque look.  however its almost imperfect in how the black scales have become the darkish red  / brown  ;  something not quite right.  scales do fall off without warning from time to time, revealing a near lava like flow underneath.   )  

baricontralto  . .  a name to be used to not arouse suspicion  ;   a soldier that would destroy armies and bring cities to their knees in the name of his master.   time would be swift for the pawn to be used,  for the king himself was pleased.  he was cocky with his new toy  . .   and it wasn’t long before he was to be used   . .  

despite all your losses & destruction ; despite trauma &  trials  . .  my darling boy you’re still you. (  undertale v.  )

[  fight  ]                     [  act ]                    [  item  ]                   [ mercy  ]    

                                     ↳   [  dante sparda ]                                      ↳   [   check  ]

IT WAS UNPRECEDENTED.  a human and a monster coming together and falling in love.  falling in love after the war to a human   witch   that found herself in the closed off underground after a tumble.  sparda protected eva from the monsters at first,  keeping her under his care  –  yet the umbra witch found herself using her powers and skills to assist in healing a monster in peril.  

keeping eva out of harms way was  . .  difficult due to her humanity being a source of contention.  monsters wanted to escape.  eva rather enjoyed being alive.  in the end eva’s healing magic to save and protect those around her and her love and the fact that she was  older   and not prime use to open a proper exit to the human world.  asgore swore eva off limits to monsters as she was kind and a healer to them all.

in time sparda and her married and she bore two children  ;   hybrids   –   part monster and part human.

but not even the king’s word could stop those who still feared humans and humanity.  those who held   rage   toward a species that had caused so much trouble and locked them away for thousands of years,  if not more.   a fire erupted into the underground,  started at the quaint yet spacious house and spread further throughout the underground.  by the time it had been put out  –  eva had been recovered,  dead,  in the home attempting to escape herself but the boys nowhere to be found.  with her last ounce of magic she had sent her boys away,  far away and out of the underground and topside.

now alone and separated from his remaining family and traumatized by the attack to his home the hybrid remained alone  –  growing up such until he found himself protecting humanity against   other   monsters   ;   demons.  demons and monsters that had managed to stay in the human world but grew dangerous and lost themselves.   dante sparda grew to love his humanity yet slowly accept the monster part of himself.

with a job giving him   whispers   of the brother he thought he lost through his own hand now somehow residing in the underground  . .  he flew in to investigate,  still holding some anger over what had been done to his family yet   . .  holding   determination   and patience to deal with the rumors and what he’s about to come across.