#i believe this show with all the lesbians would still give us surprise lesbians as a treat

[cannibalspicnic]

Pamela Rabe as MARGARET CARRUTHERS

DEADLOCH (2023- ) Season 1 Episode 6

[ladyloveandjustice]

Fall 2023 Anime Overview: I'm in Love with the Villainess

Premise: Rae is reincarnated as the heroine of her favorite dating sim. But she has no interest in romancing any of the boys- she's head over heels for Claire Francois, the villainess of the game. Claire is horrified to find the major target of her bullying suddenly enjoys it, often pleading "step on me harder". But Rae isn't just here to flirt with Claire- she has a plan to save her beloved from a horrible fate.

I'm allowed to have a problematic gay fave. In fact, I would call it my right as a lesbian. And I enjoy I'm in Love with a Villainess a lot, despite some bumps in the road. It's tropey as all get out and a story that shows signs of having an inexperienced author, but it has real heart to it, it's full of joy, and connects with me in surprising way.

I'll try not to ramble too much, since I'm planning on writing a longer article on this series-- so keep your eyes peeled.

I'm in Love with the Villainess might not always be polished or expertly crafted, but it is very fun and entertaining. Rae ignoring all the male love interests to stan for her mean girl fave is ultra relatable to me, and her gremlin energy is off the charts. Claire is also a super fun character-- if you love ridiculous ojou-sama characters, she is max ojou sama. But she's also hiding a lot of insecurity and of course, a secret soft side-- her character arc over the course of the series is really satisfying.

However, Rae's pushiness might be a sticking point for some. Her worst moments are mostly contained to episode 2 where she does inexcusable things like ogling Claire while she's changing (against Claire's wishes) after having wriggled her way into a position as her maid (against Claire's wishes, though Rae does have secret noble reasons for that one). This is her worst moment and she calms down a bit from there as the story starts to find itself. Her pushiness remains, but gets a bit less uncomfortable as it becomes clear Claire likes her too.

This pushiness clashes a bit with a really interesting thing ILTV does--which is engage bluntly and honestly with homophobia and stereotypes. There's a great moment in episode three where the series. Rae is asked point blank if she's gay, she responds yes. When Claire moves away from her in response, it's pointed out to her that's a form of homophobia, and it's pointed out how screwed up it is to believe anyone who's gay is automatically going to creep on every girl they see. Rae also gently corrects someone who gives her the common "she just happened to be a woman, you're just falling in love with the person right? Your love just transcends gender?" line, (which is a common line that's used to avoid talking about queerness directly in manga and anime) with "no, I'm a lesbian, I only fall in love with women."

And yes, homophobes got big mad at this scene. How dare a yuri anime be gay! I'm in Love with the Villainess does not let homophobic yuri fans feel safe.

It's really refreshing to see a silly isekai series directly engage with stereotypes and lesbian issues like this, and it was a very pleasant surprise when I read the novels.

However, this message is a little muddled by the fact Rae did harass Claire, so Claire has every right to feel uncomfortable around her. The show does acknowledge this. The story makes it clear it knows Claire has a right to distrust Rae and it's her responding badly specifically to Rae saying she's gay is the problem. But it's still very weird to simultaneously have a "gay people aren't automatically predators!!!" coupled with "well also our gay main character does commit a little sexual harassment sometimes".

(Some of this weirdness could have been rectified if the story had character besides Claire act badly to Rae saying she was gay, and have them get the lecture, since the point was supposed to be that gay people don't hit on every member of the same gender they meet...but again, that point falls flat if the lecture recipient is Claire, since Rae has already been hitting on her).

I don't really begrudge the author this- Inori was obviously just engaging in the unfortunately typical anime tropes, but also decided to also use her story to passionately educate about and defend gay people and couldn't quite reconcile the dissonance. However, it is very "have your cake and eat it too".

But ILTV does do a very interesting thing with the common anime trope of the overly demonstrative lesbian character who does wacky hijinks and declares her love in a "funny" way. Rae reveals she's so used to being treated badly and rejected by friends and crushes for being gay that she treats her feelings as big joke as a defense mechanism. Because she’s so used to being rejected for her sexuality, she’s given up on earnestly pursuing Claire from the beginning. She doesn’t think she has a shot and she doesn’t want to risk being rejected. However, if she’s loud and obnoxious about her love for Claire, the inevitable rejection doesn’t hurt so much.

She makes it so Claire’s rejecting her for being a weirdo, not because she’s gay. If it's a joke, then when everyone laughs at it and dismisses it, it doesn’t hurt…and she can still be honest about and open about being gay. She can fool even herself and stay around Claire without any of that heartbreak and awkwardness that destroyed relationships the other times she confessed her love.

Rae's arc throughout the show is overcoming her assumption that Claire would be happier with a man and there's no point in earnestly courting her. She's so used to being degraded, she thinks it's impossible she could give Claire a good life and impossible that her real feelings will be accepted.

It doesn't excuse Rae's actions, but it does make her a very interesting character, and one that's meaningful to me as a lesbian. It adds surprising depth to a usually tired trope.

There's also some other interesting aspects of the anime, like how Rae simps for Claire but doesn't simp for her classism. She often gently challenges her on it, and the "commoner uprising" plot, while pretty weirdly paced and (temporarily) resolved, does treat the commoners sympathetically. Considering how other kinds of isekai regularly excuse shit like buying slaves, it's nice to see one that very much sympathizes with marginalized.

Though the commoner uprising plot does lead us to the other huge caveat with the anime- incest. Yeesh. There's a plot twist where it's revealed that side characters are in an incestuous relationship, and they're treated as tragic and sympathetic, they have a love that cannot be accepted, etc. The anime makes this worse by having Rae say "homosexuality isn't the only kind of forbidden love", which (unintentionally?) equates queerness and incest, which is something homophobes often do too. (The novels aren't innocent either, Rae laments "Why can't people be free to love who they want" at one point in a way that less explicitly equates the two things). However I was able to stand this because it's mainly executed as a plot twist. We don't get any details about the character's relationships, we barely see them even stand next to each other, and they're out of the plot fairly quickly. I can absolutely see this being a deal breaker for someone less numb to anime bullshit through.

And finally, a character comes in who acts fairly manipulative and skeezy towards Rae herself, though the drama she does stoke is great stuff.

So yes, I mean it when I say it has problems! But I find the fun shenanigans, blatant lesbian wish fulfillment, honest advocation for queer people, and the joy and earnestness of the series worth it enough I can grit my teeth through it all. It should also be noted that Inori, the author, is a trans lesbian, and that's another big reason why this is so special to many people-- it's a lot easier to forgive a new author for some uneven writing when she has a stake in telling queer stories.

The anime is obviously one that doesn't have a lot of resources (and I missed some of Rae's interior monologue, which gets more into what a nerd girl she is) but it does a decent job with what it had (though I would have liked it to condense or cut some of the magic duels and Rae doing harassment to focus more on the stories strengths, but alas). I have my fingers crossed for a second season, but the yuri don't tend to get those, so I'm not holding my breath.

Is ILTV's pacing sometimes weird? Yes, the commoner uprising doesn't get as much attention as it should. Is it sometimes clumsy? Oh yes. Do I still get a joy like no other when Rae kicks aside the screen prompting her to choose a male interest to yell for Claire instead, or when she fantasizes about herself and Claire being warriors together? Hell yes.

ILTV is often silly, often flawed, but you know what, queer people get to have our silly, flawed, but still occasionally touching stories as well. Straight people have has a monopoly on it too long. It's not a series for everyone, but it's a series that spoke to some struggling queer people regardless, and it's a series that makes me smile, and that's all that matters at the end of the day.

[bettyshoweduptotheparty]

Thoughts on the Eras Tour II after Paris

After four nights in Paris of the new Eras tour setlist and a bit of digestion time, here are my thoughts on it:

New outfits: SO GOOD! Love all the new costumes, especially the lesbian flag lover bodysuit and the TTPD dress 😍 Question though: Are the 1989 multi colour sets now mix and match? Because that would give us 16 possible new outfits, not including the shoes!

Set list changes: I don't mind the songs that we've lost and the combination of folklore and evermore, it makes space for a long TTPD set and that's totally worth it imo. Still cannot believe we were right about the Archer and Long Live being replaced by BDILH and WAOLOM. That's so savage, she's really not pleading with her audience anymore, mockery and middle fingers all the way! Female rage: the musical indeed.

TTPD set: We got blessed! This set is so unbelievable good, it's unreal. The haunted house vibe of WAOLOM, the church visuals for BDILH, being 'beamed up' for Down Bad, the colourless throwback to the ME! mv (😭) and the little theatrical transition into ICDIWABH (which is both devastating and funny at the same time). I will be watching every livestream of this until August.

Surprise songs: No more rules, all bets are off! Repeats, mashups, guest appearances, everything is fair game now. But we still know what will happen when she eventually plays I Did Something Bad, right? ;)

Paris N4: I didn't even know the 🏈 dude was there until I saw it on here this morning. I recommend not joining livestreams until the show has started and falling sleep/switching off after Mastermind.

Chill your boots, guys, he owes her some return investment after all of the games she attended for him. Yes, she said 'fuck 'em it's over' but we need to exercise patience. If it annoys you that he's there, that's valid, but it's honestly so easy to ignore. And no, the 1989 set last night was NOT Chiefs colours, it was orange and gold/yellow.

Let the swifties believe that she serenaded her man last night, we know the songs she sang were all Karlie songs. And the combinations last night were really so telling, all songs about coming home and beginning anew with your other half. We're getting there guys, have patience. On to Stockholm next, brace yourselves for 17/5 (175) day!!

[kitsune-pop]

how do I talk about furry rights without people rolling their eyes and ignoring me? how do I bring up issues like online bullying and exclusion from communities without people calling me "one of the annoying ones?"

furries, in many ways represent transhumanism. now, I don't personally believe every single furry is a transhuman, or even give the concept much thought. however, the very existence of furries reflect the tenets of transhumanism. the idea to reject one's very species, to find comfort and camaraderie with others who share your feelings, to make changes to your everyday life in order to pursue that comfort. you can replace "furry" with "trans" and nothing would change

both furries and trans people have communities that overlap almost completely. I myself am a furry, and I have many fursonas. I am also a therian, otherkin, otherwise known as transhuman. I feel a level of discomfort not just in the perceived gender of my birth but in my human body. I very much wish I was a fox, and often fantasize about being one, or being turned into one in an entirely non sexual way. (if it was sexual, there still wouldn't be anything wrong with it because pursuing personal happiness can only be a good thing)

regardless, concepts like transhumanism have been a part of the furry community for as long as there was a furry community. some of the earliest records show in the summer of 1990 people online who identified more as elves than humans call themselves "elfkin," and as this new vocabulary spread, there were people who identified as animals, both fictional and factual, and they were initially labeled as "otherkin" by elfkin to differentiate from their specific community, and otherkin has more recently been described as "therian" in modern conversations. and we as a people can also acknowledge that the idea of humans turning into something nonhuman is a concept that has existed for as long as man has an understanding of the difference between man and beast. and even further, we know people who have sympathized with the nonhumans, or identified with their plight, in some way, shape or form. this is most often seen in queer communities

now, with this understanding of the idea of furries out of the way, is it any surprise that a huge amount of the trans community, as well as the lgbtqia+ community as a whole, also identify as furries? the modern interpretation of nonhumans existing as themselves happily? the idea that even though you are different, you are still loved and supported by like-minded individuals? is it such a surprise that so many of us had fursonas when we were younger? that as we matured and our understanding of our identities grew and became more complex over time we began questioning fundamental parts of our identities? I, for one, did it backwards. I transitioned, came out as a lesbian, and only then did I become a furry. and since I had all the hard parts of my identity out of the way, that meant I got to scrutinize my concept of what being a furry meant to me. and it allowed me to see the parallels between the trans community and the furry community

telling your family and being mocked. telling your friends and them treating you like an outsider. being outed by others in public spaces and facing public ridicule and shaming. feeling uncomfortable in your body. performing affirmative actions to alleviate the feeling of physical and mental discomfort. finding community online. talking to others and realizing you are not alone, you are not wrong, there are so many others like you. learning new ways to express yourself. still having a feeling of discomfort in how other people, outsiders to your community, will react if they find out what you are. relationships not working because of this part of your identity. only feeling comfortable in spaces exclusive to your community for fear of being gawked at and made unsafe. physical abuse directly because of how others interpret you as a threat, or something that needs to be "fixed." the words "trans" and "furry" are interchangeable here. and in many cases for furries, all of this is applied to them if they simply are furries and don't necessarily identify as therians or otherkin. then it can be seen as a direct one-for-one experience, unfortunate as it is

if more evidence is needed, think about how furries are treated online. the word "furry" itself is treated almost like a slur, calling someone a furry as a derogatory joke, or discrediting them because they are a furry. not to mention the proliferation of aggressive misinformation to further slander the furry community as a whole, such as them being sex crazed freaks, pedophiles and rapists (sound familiar?) the idea that there are "good" and "bad" members of the communities, ones you should listen to (the ones who are palatable, who keep it private, who aren't therian) and the ones you shouldn't listen to (the weirdos, the ones with weird pronouns, the ones who wear weird things out)

trans panic has gotten so ridiculous that there has even been an attack on the furry community by legislation. senate bill 3084 in Oklahoma banned the use of litter boxes in schools based on the rumors of furry children "demanding" this be allowed. this not only shows just how ludicrous the anti trans legislation that's been swallowing up the country has gotten, but how easily furries gets swept up with lgbtqia+ in cishet spaces. I would expect more sympathy for the furry community by the trans community at least, if not the larger lgbtqia+ community. and yet furries are still allowed to be made out to be jokes and insults.

now, I'm not saying that furries have been the target for systemic oppression in the same way the lgbtqia+ community has. but what I am trying to say is that we should step up and defend those who have been by our side every step of the way, cheering us on at parades and helping us figure out our identities. there are a lot of problems with how people both on and offline treat furries, and how it is just allowed to happen. because if you speak up against violence towards a community, you are labeled as "one of the bad ones"

[judeable-brainrot]

TRANS HEADCANNONS!!!

Art

- VERY REPRESSED FOR YEARS OF HIS LIFE. he would be overly feminine to try and cover up these feelings he had and it made him feel even worse, especially when puberty started. didn’t understand what was happening with him or why he was feeling “wrong”

- he meets Patrick, who isn’t medically transitioned yet but is socially and when they grow closer, Art does some research into it and he finds the words to his feelings

- obviously, Patrick is the first person he comes out to and Patrick is super excited because it’s like having a brother for him:) Patrick helps him come out to his family and the other players at the tennis academy and stands up for him

- starts T around age 16-17 and it’s a very new thing. he feels a little shame about the new changes (hair, bottom growth, voice cracks, etc.) but once he’s gotten past the worst of it he grows more confident about himself and his masculinity

- he DEFINITELY feels shame about his bottom growth at first. his bikini area was never a huge issue for him and his dysphoria so it’s a little uncomfortable but the more it grows and the more he matures, the more he starts to enjoy his little dink and take pride in it

- gets top surgery once he’s graduated so age 18-19. VERY anxious the whole time, does tons of research on it, watches videos, looks at before and after photos to the max. he’s so loopy after he barely even knows what happens, shouting to Patrick that they “stole my tits!”

- i feel like once he’s more settled into himself, he privately experiments with skirts and longer hair, maybe some see through button ups to show off his scars. body glitter. jewelry. just things:)

- hates having to explain to potential partners about his body, makes him super uncomfortable:( and the reactions are usually not great so he just goes home and lays with Patrick to feel better

Patrick

- knew from a young age that he was not really a “girl” or at least how a girl should be. once he was in his pre-teens it was obvious. stared hormone blockers around 13-14 and then T a year later

- feel like he identified as a lesbian for a few years when he was in middle school before coming out fully, followed that pipeline but being on T affects his sexuality too (i am a FIRM bi Patrick believer)

- when he meets Art, he clocks him right away and while he is supportive when he comes out, he’s not surprised at all. in his head he’s like “yeah, okay. no duh, dude.” but he still stands up for him and protects him from transphobia:)

- he deals with his dysphoria in silence. he just feels really numb some days about his body and isn’t as outgoing or peppy as usual. he comes back to his room with Art and just lays there for a while, thinking. Art tries to help but usually just gives him space.

- when he gets his bottom growth he takes multiple nudes. not for anyone, just for himself so he can admire it and take pride in his progress. he also gets phalloplasty later in life (late 20s) he’s also extremely fond of his body hair that fills in (LOVES that he can shave now)

- he gets top surgery about a year or two after Art, who guides him the whole time. he only tells Art that he’s super scared</3

- Patrick goes to pride in chest harnesses and shorts to show off his scars (which he has painted) he’s very prideful in his identity and his transition and who he is now:)

- once he gets his phalloplasty surgery and the doctor clears him, he really starts his slut era. it’s a little rocky at first, he isn’t experienced with using a dick outside of a strap but once he gets the hang of it, he’ll jump anything like the man he is😌

[trillscienceofficer]

thoughts on writing Seven in smut under the cut

I was rereading comments on my own fic (as one does) and in my replies from 2022 I was surprised to find this

I totally think Seven would really love the idea (and the act) of giving pleasure, in part because she conceptualizes it as "winning the game" with B'Elanna (lol) but also I think because it's possibly the complete opposite of being a drone (her body being used as a tool for violence VS Seven autonomously deciding to make someone she cares about feel good).

first of all, past me, that was a lot to take in and I'm not sure whether to be a little emotional or sneer at it now. Is it too simplistic a reasoning? I have no idea. Do I still subscribe to it? Kind of! I don't think Seven is that conscious of it, and in this reply I didn't really touch on the fact that it's also a way to maintain control for Seven. Regardless, it seems I had much stronger thoughts on this back then than I do now, partly because now I live in a world where I have already written this take on how sex between Seven and B'Elanna would look like a long time ago and so it is 'done' and I don't feel like there's a need for me to write the same thing again.

A lot of what I think about Seven in the context of sexual encounters has not changed though—her reluctance to be touched in general, definite boundaries on where and how touch happens, the fact that getting off for Seven pretty much always excludes what we consider ""regular sex acts"" like penetration and direct clitoral stimulation. These are all staples of my own characterization of Seven that I'm unwilling to let go of. Why do I think this? A bit of this is due to my personal experiences and following that, frustration that so much f/f smut doesn't seem to recognize or in any way translate to fic what I think are fairly common boundaries when it comes to sex among real life lesbians and bi women. In 2022 I believed (and I still do) that Seven would be the perfect candidate for that, another way to subvert the way she's presented in the show, often as an object on which (male) fantasies can be enacted upon. I'm aware that in writing porn I'm also enacting fantasies on a fictional character; but in these fantasies Seven's the one who takes charge of herself, who finds partners who listen to her and don't question her preferences, even take those boundaries as an opportunity rather than as restrictions. They don't need to go away either! I pretty much think the same of Picard era Seven, despite all her outward "mellowing" (however you want to take that characterization choice).

But to circle back to the quote at the beginning, I stil think Seven would be just be kind of amazed that her actions can be a source of pleasure to a partner. "I just want to be useful", she says in the show, not to mention how often she loses it when she believe she has disappointed people she respects. I maybe wouldn't draw such a direct line any longer between the source of all her trauma and the way she has sex, but the gist of it is still there anyway. I think it fits her, and I can't unsee it and so now you have suffered all these words when I could've probably just said "I think Seven is a dumbass top". Sue me.

[princess-of-the-corner]

Something I didn't immediately notice about W.I.T.C.H.: in the comic the Guardians (and Elyon) seem as close to queer as it would be feasible in a Disney comic first published in Italy during the 2000s and the 2010s. All of them have what in hindsight is a clear indication they aren't hetero - and for Irma is rather blatant.

Will: after certain events in the New Power arc her relationship with Matt almost collapses, and while it's salvaged due an elderly couple literally shouting at Matt to just go and tell her how much he loves her by the last issue one may get the impression Will is using him as a beard but is in denial.

Irma: goes from boy to boy during the entire series - and in the last issue she says something that is VERY close to a love declaration to Cornelia. To me looks like she was a lesbian and in denial until the last issue.

Taranee: after a certain thing in the third arc collapses her relationship with Nigel she seems to have a thing with a friend at the Jensen Dance Academy... That never goes anywhere. She's instead seen more often with Will (her closest friend).

Cornelia: her relationship with Caleb in the comid was a disaster waiting to happen (long story short, they dreamed of each other and fell in love without really knowing each other. When they finally managed to spend a few hours together they realized just that, and had at least enough sense to end things before they did something stupid. There was even a special about what would have happened if they had persevered, and it wasn't pretty). Things with Peter went much better, but by the late comic he had conspicuously disappeared - and in the last issue she looked more happy than surprised at Irma's declaration. Make that what you will.

Hay Lin: her relationship with Eric went well until he moved out of Heatherfield, at which point he slowly disappeared (last time he's even mentioned is in a story after the New Power arc where Irma implies they broke up, with the story in question being a romantic mess about Hay Lin's new crush). And then, in a later story, she flat-out states she has never fallen in love before.

Elyon: the comic gives the exact same vibe as if she was in love with Cornelia but in denial as the show. They didn't go and say she likes boys that look like Cornelia, but she took Cornelia's apparent betrayal (Cedric lied to her) REALLY hard, grew attached to the shapeshifter who normally goes around looking like male!Cornelia, was quick to reconcile with her the moment she had the chance (that was when she still believed Phobos was a good guy), and the guy she ends up dating is Caleb, Cornelia's ex.

Now I realize what they were almost certainly doing, but back then I was a naive Italian teenaged boy who liked magical girl series and completely missed the subtext.

Gay as hell tbh

[systemhead]

something about this video is giving hauntology - between the one guy with the pride flag and hillary clinton not actually doing the macarena and just clapping and for a split second making a really wild face

postscript HIGH EFFORT edit (i.e., hold the fucking phone)

"Consider that the cast of Rent performed at the opening night of the 1996 Democratic National Convention in Chicago (fig. 42). The idea that a song from an AIDS performance has now become linked with the very political systems that AIDS performance has historically set out to confront is not without its irony. Certainly, the contradiction [hell yeah] between the inclusion of Rent within the spectacle of presidential politics and the political reality of the people which Rent [in 1998 Rent was still, fairly, considered radical, we as readers in 202X must remember this] represents is unavoidable. Rent's performance at the convention is a vivid reminder of how AIDS performance can be absorbed and redefined by other, more powerful systems who use [SIC BITCH] it to serve their own interests, whether that interest is denying voice and visibility to the communities represented in Rent (no person with AIDS addressed the delegates during the prime-time televised convention programming) or whether the interest is in benignly entertaining the convention delegates with a musical number from a popular Broadway show. [author goes on to say some incredibly 1998 shit about "a more participatory political process" but it actually leads into a more interesting read of Rent but that's boring.]"

Acts of Intervention: Performance, Gay Culture, and AIDS

Pages 281-282

David Roman [YOU THINK I CARE ABOUT A PROPER CITATION?]

see? I told you there was hauntology present

POST POST SCRIPT EDIT (BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE)

you were stabbed in the back flag man

AUGUST

SEPTEMBER

"Gay rights advocates today denounced President Clinton's midnight signing of a bill to deny Federal recognition and benefits to couples of the same sex who might marry, dismissing it as a ''historical misjudgment'' that endorsed a ''needless and mean-spirited bill.''

Such criticism came as no surprise and was exactly in line with the reaction Mr. Clinton expected when he announced in May that he would sign the bill to avoid a political firestorm on an issue he did not support in the first place.

The President's spokesman, Michael D. McCurry, acknowledged that Mr. Clinton had signed the bill because ''the President believes the motives behind this bill are dubious and the President believes that the sooner he gets this over with the better.''

No state allows same-sex marriage, but a court case is pending over efforts to permit it in Hawaii. Mr. Clinton has long supported gay rights but has also long opposed same-sex marriage, and he said in the spring that he would sign a bill defining marriage as the union of one man and one woman and allowing states to ignore same-sex marriages sanctioned by other states.

Some civil rights advocates had urged the President to veto the bill on the constitutional ground that it would weaken the ''full faith and credit'' clause requiring states to honor regulations of other states. But Mr. Clinton, who paid a heavy political price for his early, unsuccessful effort to allow homosexuals to serve openly in the military, was eager to prove himself a social moderate unwilling to pick a fight over such a sensitive issue.

''President Clinton has become the first President in history to trample on states' traditional jurisdiction over marriage,'' said Elizabeth Birch, executive director of the Human Rights Campaign, a gay rights group. ''With the stroke of his pen, he has condoned the exclusion of all lesbian and gay Americans from the Federal benefits and responsibilities that come with marriage, even though it will be years before such an institution becomes available to them.''

The law will not ban such marriages, but will deny recognition of them, for example by precluding spousal benefits distributed by Government programs like Social Security and veterans services.

Mr. Clinton signed the bill without ceremony in the wee hours this morning, after returning from a four-day campaign trip.

The White House has made clear its discomfort with the bill, in part because some of its supporters used antihomosexual language that Mr. Clinton was not eager to be seen as tolerating, much less endorsing.

And though the President has often been happy to endure criticism from the left because it makes him appear more moderate, he did not want a messy election-year fight with gay rights advocates who have been among his strongest supporters, so the White House has soft-pedaled the issue at every turn.

By contrast, Mr. Clinton went out of his way in his weekly radio address to the nation this morning to highlight a more mainstream, old-fashioned concept of family. He repeated his support for allowing mothers and newborn children at least 48-hour hospital stays, instead of the 24-hour limit insurance companies generally impose, and praised Congressional leaders for agreeing this week to pass such a provision.

''Parents deserve at least two days of care and comfort when they can hold their child, bond with the child, introduce the child to the world and make sure their child is in the very best of health,'' Mr. Clinton said. ''America has a responsibility to protect the health of our families.''

Mr. Clinton also praised the leadership of the Republican-controlled Congress for agreeing to require insurance companies to offer comparable benefits for mental and physical illnesses, one of his Administration's longtime goals.

Mr. Clinton used both the gay marriage issue and the motherhood questions he addressed today to portray himself as the architect of reasonable compromise on such questions.

He said that since he vetoed the Republicans' budget-cutting plans last year, they have sat up and listened more carefully. It is one of the principal themes of his re-election campaign, and one that public opinion surveys show has been working.

''This week's agreement shows what we can accomplish when we set aside rigid agendas, put aside partisanship and work together,'' Mr. Clinton said. ''Just a year ago, Congress was consumed by bitter partisanship as the Republican majority sought deep cuts in Medicare and Medicaid, education and the environment that were unnecessary to balance the budget.

''I vetoed their plan, and the American people supported my decision. So this year, in clear contrast, we are getting things done.'' "

[yeah I know it marks me as old for giving a shit about Clinton but how quickly we forget that this man was the BLUEPRINT AND ARCHITECT for liberal "reasonable compromise" and the respect for state's rights loser liberal bullshit that is one of the main reasons for anti-trans legislation today]

[yes I'm aware that this jumps from just being okay with gay people to AIDS to gay marriage legal/financial benefits to trans rights and isn't a coherent chain of points but that's how the world works okay? "beyond the scope of this essay" bullshit. I'm going to write the way that I wanted to write every undergraduate essay before I had to inevitably pare it down to come across as sane]

[jollyreginaldrancher]

Yellowjackets S1 e9

The bodies are just piling up now

Why would he not just google her though? Why would he go out of his way to buy a book about it all? His excuses are pretty flimsy.

For a second I thought they were gonna bury Laura and i was wondering if there even was enough of her to bury and if they bothered to swim all that way to look for parts.

Turns out they were just resorting to eating bugs.

Poor Van

Jeff was definitely sparkledong! I knew it!

At first I thought "what could the possibly decorate with?" Then i saw all the bits and bobs from their hunts and yeah. I guess that's setting up whatever was going on in the first episode with the weird outfits and the cultish vibes.

Shauna definitely wants Jackie and vice versa. There is no other explanation. Okay there are other explanations but this is the narrative I'm going with. If they won't show us the lesbians I'll make my own lesbians, damn it!

My guy, you met another woman at a hotel and expect us to believe it wasn't an affair? Is he that naive?

Jackie is being nice to Misty with no conditions and calling her beautiful and I think I'm gonna cry 🥹

Jeff tried to take the fall for the murder. Bless him, he really is a himbo 🥹 everyone is showing their best side today.

That montage was so great. We have Misty out there doing the work. Lottie missing Laura Lee and hugging her shirt 🥹. Shauna's growing baby bump 😮. Jackie curling her hair with ribbons -their haircare being something I wondered about but these girls found a way- and Van and Taissa 🥹🥹🥹 addressing Van's self-consciousness with a sweet gesture of solidarity and these girls are working their way into my heart 😭 I just know shit is too good to last.

Those mushrooms are gonna be a lot of trouble aren't they?

Why is Jackie not eating? She's giving suicidal vibes, is she going to kill herself?

The dance is adorable

Nat had alcohol and held out while Van was getting her face stitched up? Like she didn't even share a swig with her or nothing? I shouldn't hold this against her but I do.

Jackie's behaviour is a very unsettling cry for help.

It's funny how aware everyone suddenly got when they were high.

Oh this isn't a funny/haha high, this is an *eat somebody's face off* kind of high.

Yeah, Javi, RUN!

But we know Tyler survives though cause he dies in the future. I just wish the scene followed Van and Taissa more instead 🤣 we had to sit through so many straight sex scenes, why can't they give us ONE gay one? 😭

I spoke too soon. That was beautiful. Really freaking short but beautiful. 🥹

Poor Misty 😅 maybe next time you'll crush on a straight guy

Dang, Nat stopped Trevor becoming a Mcthottie meal.

I will say I didn't expect Lottie to become the ringleader. Then again they were super fucked up.

I feel so bad for Van though. She deserves all the head she can get 😭

A bunch of (presumably) cannibals are in a room with a dead body and they can't think of a single way to get rid of it?

Misty is gonna kill the reporter, huh? There's no way she would be spilling that much if she wasn't. Or is she really that naive? She's been easily led before, that's why I wonder.

I gotta say, it's smart they hired Juliette Lewis as the one with substance abuse issues cause she visibly looks older but she's also very energetic so it feels believable that she would be their age while looking a bit older, but still being as vibrant as the rest of them.

Look what the cat dragged in. Part of me wishes for Misty to disentangle from this mess and not give in to the shitty friends who only call when they need her but another part is shipping her with Nat.

It's been a forgone conclusion that there was cannibalism and Misty more or less admitted to it this episode. I wonder if it's going to happen in the next episode or if they're saving it for later. It would make sense for one of them to die; it is after all a season finale. And not doing it feels anticlimactic. But this show has pleasantly surprised me before. Waiting 9 episodes to finally get a lesbian sex scene wasn't a pleasant surprise though, it was agony.

My guesses for the unhappy meal are:

Jackie

Javi

Shauna's baby

The coach?

Or one of those girls that barely gets a line like Mari.

It could be one, it could be all. Hell, it could be Natalie and she could be a ghost. I doubt it though. I wonder if they'll ever show why they're all being such assholes to Misty though. Cause they don't know about the black box so far, and even if they did it's not like they could figure out she broke it. So we'll have to see if that's addressed next episode or further down the line.

That said it's not a given they don't eat Vanessa but I don't think they would do all this work to set her and Taissa as the main romantic couple in this show if they were going to kill one of them off so soon. I still have hope. We might not have seen her in the present yet but that doesn't mean that she's not there though.

I think it's gonna be Jackie though. It feels like they're setting her up as a horror movie victim. I don't know, that's just the vibe in getting. Like they're trying too hard to make her likeable now that it's near the end so we feel bad when she dies.

Also on rewatch, it's interesting that we've seen two necklaces, one of gold and one of bone, and they each seem to be for protection and keep making the rounds between girlfriends. I noticed the bone one around Taissas's throat during the wolf attack for example. I feel like it definitely worked there. I wonder if that's gonna be a thing later on.

[linathelemon]

Yuri, Sayori, Monika and Natsuki being ur lesbian gf

swear to god i'm so gay for these girls <3

also i haven't played DDLC plus so if certain things are off im sorry :(((

Natsuki, Sayori, Yuri and Monika being ur lesbian gf

Sayori

if you thought Sayori was clingy platonically, she is even more clingy when she's dating you!

and yes Sayori does use nicknames, mostly it's Sweetie, honey, and angel

she loves you so much despite making many mistakes. Sayori is so happy that she can count on you not to judge her!

when Sayori gets into severe depressive periods, all she wants to do is sit and talk to you.

speaking of her depressive moods, when it's particularly bad Sayori tends to spend more time and cling to you more. Sayori is afraid that one day you'll find someone else :((

"are you sure i'm what you want?"

Sayori needs a lot of reassuring

"angel..why won't the rainclouds go away?"

but she will return the favor even if you tell her that it's fine. that you were doing the right thing.

when you're the one upset, she will comfort you by being there and listening to whatever's wrong.

although expect her to trip many times, Sayori gets very giggly the times you actually catch her

• Sayori is not afraid of giving you affection in public, including at school.

Sayori does try to reason with people who say homophobic things. she tends to see the best in everyone

Natsuki

Natsuki is moderately clingy?? she certainly was not clingy before dating. It seemed like Natsuki wanted to bonk you on the head every time she saw you. it was almost certain that she hated you

but apparently, not

Natsuki does have her moments, where she shows how her life actually is at home. and Natsuki does wonder if you'd want to be dating someone with a normal family.

Natsuki just needs some reassuring

Natsuki often bakes cupcakes for you and her to eat together

she doesn't admit that she honestly wanted to see you

she doesn't feel embarrassed showing PDA, not an overwhelming amount. but a hug or a kiss here and there throughout the day.

in private it's a different story-

if someone has the guts to insult her s/o (she doesn't care if they insult her) then Natsuki will proceed to personally insult their entire life, and their family's blood line

Natsuki also uses nicknames but some of them are a bit interesting

airhead, babe, sweetie etc

she doesn't admit it but Natsuki truly loves you <3

Yuri

Yuri is shy in front of others but in private, she won't hesitate to be direct. and show you what she wants.

Yuri is still somewhat hesitant to initiate affection but it just takes her a few moments!

Yuri would love to read horror novels with you, reading is such a relaxing activity for her. and it's, even more, relaxing with her girlfriend

"i'm reading a new horror novel, would you like to read it with me?"

Yuri would talk out with you her urges to hurt herself, and learn things about each other together.

and maybe find a solution to her problems.

she isn't big on PDA but she will hold your hand in the hallway.

but that's about it in public, the one public space she'll do more PDA

is in the clubroom because she trusts everyone there.

although, if someone insults your relationship, she will shut it down and maybe scare them a tad.

she'll call you nicknames like, Sweetheart, love

regardless of her shyness Yuri loves you so much that it hurts sometimes <3

Monika

Monika loves surprising you with gifts, she did do that somewhat before dating.

after dating it's even more. Monika truly believes you deserve nothing but the best!

Monika will have a conversation about boundaries, how much affection do you like? how much time would you like to spend with her? what are your views on PDA? she really wants to be the best girlfriend!

Monika does some PDA but not an overwhelming amount, she prefers doing more PDA in private.

she does ask you to stay after the literature club just to shower you in affection, Monika wants you to know how much you actually

mean to her <3

Monika does have moments where she feels that she's not doing enough for the club and that's the reason it's not popular.

when Monika is feeling like this she needs someone to show her that what she is doing isn't wrong.

"thank you, love."

[radsloth95]

I think what really breaks my heart about the way that gender identity/trans ideology being lumped in with sexual orientation is how it further polarizes political, social and religious groups. When we perceive our close held values as being attacked, our immediate defense is to double down and use confirmation bias to find evidence that supports our worldview.

For example, we see these religious groups like catholicism and mormonism that are against gay marriage, where progress might have changed some more minds with time. But now people can just take any legitimate story about transgender debate (e.g. trans athletes taking over women's sports or people claiming their 7 year old is transgender because he likes to wear dresses) and use it as their evidence. It would sound something like 'Look at what the LGBTQ community is doing now, this is what will happen everywhere if we support them'. And because it's all lumped together, their solid reasoning for being against gender ideology becomes an automatic defense against the lgb community.

You can see the exact opposite mindset occurring in any liberal group where to have an accepting mindset now means you must not only accept all persons but you must also refer to them the way they want to be referred to, lest you cause children to commit suicide. (And the increased incidence of suicide or attempted suicide was and still is a very real problem for gay, lesbian, and bisexual teens and young adults, so the idea that 'misgendering' someone could cause the same problem has a very real effect on people who want to be accepting of others.)

Just look at the new employee orientation for my job, which had a fake scenario wherein two employees joked to each other after a patient left about how weird it was that the patient used they/them pronouns when 'everyone could clearly see he was a man'. This scenario was there to point out how 'extremely disrespectful' it was to joke about the man's pronouns. Later this week, I get to take a course on gender affirming Healthcare. I work for a major Healthcare provider that claims to support evidence based practices. (Insert eyeroll emoji here.) These are examples of a major provider trying to appear as accepting of everyone and not wanting to show hostility against future patients and their future money. By lumping in gender identity with sexual orientation, it makes the idea of gender identity seem like just as much of a hot button issue in need of protection against discrimination, so large corporations want to prove their worth in being supportive of gender ideology.

My point is that I feel like 10 years ago, we were actually well on our way to a more accepting world where members of some conservative groups were starting to accept gay marriage and the idea of sexual orientation being innate might have one day become an extremely common view point and generally well accepted idea in society. Look at how progressive changes 100 years ago become the normal viewpoint in time, like how polarizing the idea of giving women the right to vote was, but now no one would ever argue with it. I think we could have had an more accepting world in supporting the lgb community, but then gender ideology went and married itself (themselves?) to sexual orientation, for better or for worse. And now if sexual orientation wants out of the deal, are we even surprised that no one believes us about gender ideology being abusive? When have they ever believed the victim in a marriage dispute before?

[viktoriakosci666]

I dont understand HOW sjm has SO many fans! Like, all those celebrities who have done a bad thing (Amber Heard, Chris Brown) or believe in something that is seen as negative and hurts other people (JK Rowling) are terrorised by the media and its people! But sjm? No, she totally didn't do ANYTHING bad or terrible! 😱

It's not like she copied other authors works and implemented them into her own story! It's not like she created the Illyrians, who are POC (apparently) only to HATE on them and make them out to be misogynistic and abusive to females?! Other authors would be getting called racist by now! It's not like she sexualized Nesta being skinny and even body shamed her in the books! It's not like she acts like her MCs are feminists, only to be brought down for a man who then impregnates them and lies to them about their life being in danger! Oh, HOW feminist of you Rhys! How feminist of you Sarah Janet MyAss! She should be getting called a misogynist, but SOMEHOW she isn't? She also makes out that woman can't be powerful unless they know how to fight! Wow. Thanks Sjm, I've always known I was weak during my fight from poverty, but it's ALWAYS good to get an amateurs opinion.

And then there's the whole Mor thing, with terrible LGBT representation. Her own fans were not sure whether Mor was a lesbian or Bisexual because she just didn't explain it well enough when writing that conversation with Feyre, as Mor states that she's attracted to both genders, and YET her reaction to her sleeping with Helion REALLY doesn't show that she's bisexual, as to me personally it seemed like she was scarred from having sex with a man instead of having sex with HELION himself.

And finally. . . 😤 ignoring the trauma of LITERALLY every character except Feyre and Rhys, despite being VERY aware that her series is popular and MANY young adults and teenagers would read these books and think 'Oh, I guess this behaviour is okay', which, it's isn't! Rhys sexually assaulting Feyre, Cassian gaslighting Nesta, Azriel being willing to screw Elain but then ditch her. . . none of that is okay! But young people don't know that and aren't aware of this, so they believe EVERY single toxic and abusive thing that sjm tells them, and THATS exactly why Feysand and Nessian still exists!

Nesta: suicidal, depressed, sexual assault victim, has been body shamed and over sexualized by her mate, has PTSD, may have a food disorder

Lucien: possibly suicidal, sexual assault victim, abused and used by LITERALLY every single person he has ever met

Tamlin: borderline depressed, PTSD, sexual assault victim, may be suicidal

SJM: Oh, that's so sad 😥! But let me just ignore this *wacks away the coloured letters* and I'll forget about it! 😚 Let's focus more on Rhys, Feyre and Gwyn!!

And I'm not invalidating Rhys, Feyre or ESPECIALLY Gwyns trauma. Gwyn SHOULD get a healing arc. But SJM completely forgot about the other threes trauma, especially Lucien and Tamlins, because she knew that if she spoke again about how poor Tamlin and Lucien are, feysand stans would be on her ass being like 'Lucien left feyre to die! Tamlin locked her up!'. But instead of giving the two characters some closure, she just decided to make them the NC's lap dogs (Nesta and the Valkyries too).

And I'm not saying this because I hate Gwyn (Love her, she deserves better than Assriel and having Eris as her grandpapa, Lucien would be a better choice) but SJM DOES kind of make what happened to Gwyn stand out more than the trauma that Nesta and Emerie went through. . . I was rereading Acosf, and I ALWAYS got a bit teary when it came to Gwyn speaking about her trauma, but with Nesta?

The fact that Thomas nearly raped her was basically GLOSSED over and Emerie having an abusive and misogyny family who clipped her was just summed up in one page (if I remember correctly) whilst mentions of what had happened to Gwyn were scattered all over the book, and since this was NESTAS journey, I was surprised at first when I first read the book (acosf), cause I didn't really care about Gwyn then, and I was just hopping from excitement about Nestas trauma being mentioned more often (since I was scared sjm would never mention her trauma again), or even handled better, but it just. . . was a lot of Feysand and Gwyn propaganda, and Nesta slander. Yeah 😭

Sjm EVEN focuses more on LoA and Helion than Lucien, Tamlin and Nesta, who ARE essentially some of the main characters 😭

Anyway, SJM ignoring all this trauma that the characters have or even acting like it isn't important, is going to teach those people that trauma should be ignored and forgotten, that if you're suicidal, NO ONE cares! If you're being body shamed, NO ONE cares! If you're being harassed or sexually assaulted, NO ONE cares! If someone is being racist to you, NO ONE cares!

And I think that THIS is why SJM should just stop WRITING BOOKS! Because people DO care about your trauma, and SJM is going to make you think otherwise. The author may not say it directly, but her work is proven to be misogynistic, racist, sexist, and as they say, 'the words and actions within a book says more about the author than the actual book'.

[palaceofpassion]

MAY I stop Time?

A fic done for a friend!  In which May lets her new semblance go to her head.  

“Okay… okay I can do this.”  

Here May rested, her body hanging above the man of her dreams, one of the many people of her dreams but still the only man.  Her eyes gazed upon his delectable form, his toned form gained through months and months of hard work.  His boyish face on the threshold of a chiseled deity.  Nearly losing herself in his gorgeous blue eyes she felt her heart thump in her chest.  Her beloved Jaune rested below her, his body glistening with the sweat of his hard labor.  

Even as she lowered herself upon his lap he made no distinct movements, no signs of noticing her attempts.  In fact he didn’t move at all, neither did the incredibly gorgeous women around him.  Taking the time to handle her nerves she gazed upon the other six figures in the room.  Her pulse raced in her veins as she stared at each of them, bare as the day they were born.  Their bodies much like Jaunes were coated in a thick layer of sweat.  And just like the man below her they made no special attention to her own depravity.  None of them moved, not a single person besides herself were even aware, conscious of her actions.  

Even as she pressed her virgin lips against the tip of his massive cock she couldn’t help but remember the day this all started.  The day that she unlocked her semblance, what felt like so long ago was only a month.  In that month she’d learned to control her powers, learned to use them to their best and make the most out of them.  And what else would she do with them but enjoy her beloveds to their fullest.  And here they all where, here they all sat around her.  

Closing her eyes she pushed down, the memories of yonder days returning to her mind as she did so.

It had been any other day, May had been at the shooting range practicing her sniping, she wouldn’t let that Ruby girl show her up!  Then out of nowhere one of the punks from Team CRDL decided it was a great idea to scare her, so they decided that they’d take a pot shot at her.  In her surprise something happened, before the dust round hit her the world came to a halt, everything slowed till the bullet stopped right in front of her.  

“Wha?!  What’s going on?!”  The normally quiet May couldn’t help but have a minor freak out when she realized the bullet that should have slammed her right in the face had stopped.  After a moment it dawned on her, this was her doing!  Excitement filled her breast as she stared at the bullet, completely forgetting about those jerks from CRDL.  In her excitement she dashed out of the room, not even paying attention to any of the other students as she passed by.  She only had a small group of people she wanted to tell, the most important people in her life.  

With speed that would drive Ruby to envy she found herself in the Library, where she knew her special friends would be.  Spotting them in the distance she made her way forward, the first coming to focus was her most beloved man.  Jaune Arc, the only person who would go out of their way to talk to a wallflower like her.  He’d gone out of his way to talk to her when no one else would at the beginning of initiation.  Being teamed with him had done nothing but cause her near case heart attacks.  She’d pretend not to stare when he’d come out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel.  She was only so strong though, weak willed as she was, she'd gaze upon his figure over and over.  And believe her when she says he’d come a long way.  She still held their first conversation dear in her heart, it was because of him that she’d been able to make such precious friends.  She wouldn’t admit it, but she’d had many an erotic dream about the young blonde… though speaking of erotic dreams she knew she wasn’t the only one.

To his right, was quite possibly the single most gorgeous woman in existence.  A beauty who made lesbians out of even straight women, Pyrrha Nikos.  The all Star Champion, the invincible girl, the untouchable unapproachable or at least that’s what May used to think.  If it hadn’t been for Jaune she may have never seen the real girl underneath, the one who was just as lonely as her, who only wanted to make friends.  They both owed a lot to Jaune, and if she was being honest, Pyrrha was probably her biggest rival for his affection.  At least she would have been if not for her also being a target of May’s pining heart.  The woman was amazing, strong, powerful, glorious, gorgeous!  But more than that she was just a girl, a sweet and loving girl that like herself was just happy spending time with her friends.  

Then there was the girl to his left, the dark skinned beauty Ciel Soleil, her own partner.  She hadn’t really known what to think of the girls when they first met.  But now they were as thick as thieves, even if Ciel rarely ever spoke.  She owed much of this to her previous two teammates, they’d taken the time to get everyone to sit and talk with one another.  She knew that if they’d been left to their own devices then neither her nor Ciel would have taken the time to become friends.  She would have surely regretted that decision.  Despite her cold nature, May knew she cared in the end, she herself was an incredibly sweet woman who May couldn’t help but feel an affinity for.

To Ciel’s own left, there was Penny Poledina, her odd but rather fun friend who had come along with her Atlas.  The two had originally planned to be partners, but because of Ciel accidentally running into May first those plans had become derailed.  Things had worked out surprisingly well as Penny would visit the four of them frequently, becoming fast friends.  May herself was surprised at how quickly Jaune had adapted to Penny’s inquisitive nature, he himself admitted to having seven sisters so he had grown to become rather patient.  She was incredibly adorable, and May couldn’t help but feel her heart flutter every time the inquisitive girl spoke to ehr.

In front of them were sitting the other three members of their little friend group.  One being the second year Velvet Scarlatina, a student who had somehow just kind of drifted into their little group.  May couldn’t even remember when she first showed up, but she was now a full part of their group.  And honestly she didn’t really mind her, though she saw the way she looked at Jaune, not that May could have blamed her.  The girl herself was quite the beauty, her adorable ears expressed a lot of her emotion, and well May would be lying if she said she HADN’T stared at that nice plump rear of hers.  

To her right was another odd one to join their friend group, Reese Chloris, she’d apparently been having issues with some of the girls from team NDGO, and Pyrrha happened to walk by.  Not one to let things like injustice go unpunished, she stepped in and absolutely humiliated them.  It was pretty obvious that Reese had originally joined by the simple virtue of her own lust and admiration towards Pyrrha.  But as time went on she became a genuine friend with the group.  May really liked her style, her mohawk was incredibly stylish, and her slim figure was one that May envied.

Then there was Weiss, the last member of their little group.  Member of team RWBY, Heiress of the Schnee Dust Company, she will never let you forget that by the way.  Or at least she wouldn’t have in the past.  Weiss was honestly the most surprising member of their group, she’d been a pain in her posterior when they’d first met.  Mostly because of how Jaune had been stricken by the young Heiress.  May hadn’t been the only one bothered by this obviously, as Pyrrha despite giving Jaune the go ahead had come to dislike the attention that she had been given.  Then there was the fact that she was quite mean when it came to turning down the young Arc.  He’d only asked her out three times and yet she’d gotten terribly upset with him… she wished he’d been more forward with her or at least Pyrrha or Cie.  Though things turned around near the dance, he’d realized that it wasn’t going to happen he  apologized and even helped push that Neptune guy in the right direction.  That ended up not working out, and well they’d become friends along the way.

She wouldn’t say that she was as fond of her as she was all the other girls, but for what it was worth she was very pretty.  

Even in her excitement she didn’t yell out to them, she hated drawing attention to herself, she was quite literally a wallflower.  Her parents had named her after a mayflower in itself.  Though, as she drew closer she noticed something strange, they hadn’t moved even the slightest.  That… that wasn’t normal, not even in the slightest.  Her confusion grew as she drew closer, finally reaching them.  Then she looked around… no one was moving, not a single person!  “Wha..what?!”  Fear seized her heart as she started to panic, had she done this?!  Did she freeze everyone?!  

“Please go back, please go back!”  Closing her eyes she wished as hard as she could that this was just a dream.  

“May?”  She nearly jumped out of her large jacket, her one good eye opening wide as the other seven individuals watched her with concern and confusion.  “When did you get here?”  Jaune’s warm voice assisted in calming her nerves.  

“I… uhm… I….”  She wanted to tell them about her semblance, this was a big moment!  But… but there was a part of her, concentrating once more she felt the world fall to a halt.  “I… I did do this…”  She’d stopped time!  She wasn’t sure exactly how she’d do it, or what had brought this around.  But this was amazing!  Though… though sinister thoughts fluttered through her mind.  Mustering her courage she walked in between her friends, taking a deep breath she leaned over towards Jaune.  It was quick and small, but she pressed her lips against his offering him a small peck.  

Pulling away she felt her face burn hot, embarrassment flowed through her.  “I… I did it!”  She couldn’t believe she’d done it, she couldn’t believe that she’d managed to kiss the boy of her dreams.  Though one could hardly call it a real kiss, it would suffice for the time.  She wasn’t quite brave enough, nor did she want to abuse these powers.

Moving back to her previous position she concentrated, time fell back in.  “Uh, I… I just wanted to come by and study with you guys… if that’s okay?”

“Of course it is sweetheart.”  Her heart fluttered in her chest as Pyrrha stared at her, her gorgeous emerald orbs peering into her ugly blueish grey.  “We’d love to have you… though it is quite strange how you’d gotten here out of seemingly nowhere.”  

“Yeah dude!  Where did you even come from?”  Reese’ question nearly threw her off.

“I uhm… I just walked over, maybe you guys didn’t notice me? I am really hard to notice. ”  She didn’t mean to get down on herself, and she sort of prided herself in her unnoticeable status.  But there was a part of her that really didn’t like it.

“No… no we would have noticed you.  You’re always noticeable to us.”  All of the girls nodded along to Jaune’s words, and once more May remembered why she loved these people.  All of them, each and every last one of them.  “So what brought you over here in a hurry?”  

“I uhm I!”  In her panic time stopped again, “oh no!”  She’d need to get better control of that, still she watched everyone.  Their lips puckered in worry for her, and then… then a thought hit her.  She could do anything!  Anything at all… so she made her move.  Stepping to Weiss first she gulped, her heavy chest heaved beneath her thick jacket.  Lowering herself she cleared the hair out of her vision.  

With courage that can only be found from her new found abilities she pressed her lips against the Heiress.  Just like her namesake she had a crisp icey taste to her, one that May would very much like to try again in the future.  

Not delaying she pulled away with a small pop, running her tongue around her lips.  

Next came Reese, the exotic girl proved to be quite the opposite, her lips had an earthy taste to them, it wasn’t bad, just completely different from Weiss.  

Next came Velvet, May couldn’t help but giggle against Velvet’s lips which tasted like Carrot Cake.  “Oh Vel~”  Pulling away she couldn’t help but run her fingers through Velvet’s ears, running her nails through her thin fur.  

Penny was next, copper, it tasted a lot like copper… and silicone?  It was an odd combination!  But she didn’t hate it, it was pleasant once she grew used to it and she may have dilly dallied a bit more than she meant to.  She placed another gentle kiss against her forehead before moving onto Ciel.

She took a moment staring at her partners glossy chocolate covered skin.  Oh god she felt her nerves fail as she grew closer.  Unlike the other girls she made sure this one lasted, her lips pressed tightly against the timely strict girl and she kept them pressed for a while.  She enjoyed her flavor most of all so far, it was a cool minty flavor one that sent chills down her spine.  After reluctantly pulling away she moved over to Pyrrha.

Her heart fluttered thoroughly in her chest, like a drum beating rapidly she felt her heart about to explode.  Mustering her courage she actually grabbed Pyrrha’s head.  Puckering as much as she could she pressed her lips, spice and ginger filled ehr senses as she found herself unable to pull away from the exotically erotic woman in front of her.  Running her tongue across her cherry red lips she couldn’t help but enjoy the woman’s plump lips.  

Truly reluctantly she pulled away, her heart thumped louder and louder to the point she swore that she could hear it pumping blood in her veins.  Turning towards Jaune she just went right in, her moist lips crashed against his.  One minute, two minutes, three minutes she continued to kiss him, not even coming up for air her courage turned into a burning fire as she ran her tongue across his teeth.  Pressing on she slipped into her mouth, by this points he was basically tongue fucking him.  She lost count for how long she’d been doing so but she now knew his taste intimately!  Thick ropes of drool rippled down as she pulled away, her tongue slipping out of his mouth last.  “So goooood~”  She wanted more, needed more!  She could always feel the power going to ehr head, but she didn’t care!  For now though… she needed to keep things under control.

Pulling back she made sure to take her original spot, giving herself time to calm her beating heart she finally allowed time to return.  She’d nearly missed it, but several of the girls, and Jaune, had quickly pressed their fingers across their lips.  Velvet herself had slipped her hand across one of her rabbit ears.  Once more time stood still, and a sudden realization hit her, “They can feel it… they can’ feel everything…”  This should have scared her, should have terrified her, but it didn’t, instead it excited her, it sent powerful urges and lit a strong desire inside of her chest.  

Once more taking the time to calm herself, she let time flow again, “I… I just wanted to see you.”  Despite her meek tone she felt far more courageous than she’d ever felt.  The fire that lit in her soul wouldn’t burn away, not for a long long time.  For now though, she’d take the time to practice, to truly get used to her powers.

“Uh… well come and sit down!”  It was obvious that Jaune was trying to get over the strange sensation in his mouth, but bless him for still thinking of her.

A small smile crossed her lips as she sat down with the group, this really was the good life and she wouldn’t trade it for anything… but she wanted more… wanted more with all of them.  It was small, but she knew what she would do.

The sun hadn’t even risen by the time she’d woken the next morning, the excitement of the previous day had truly gotten to her and in her excitement she’d found sleep hard to come by.  Even Pyrrha, Ms. Wakes up before the crack of dawn, was still slumbering, “Mmm~ Jaune not in front of the others~”  

A smile slipped past her lips as she listened to their Vice Leader talk in her sleep, it was a good thing that Jaune was such a deep sleeper.  Though she’d have to talk to Pyrrha about that one day, the girl’s thirst was unquenchable, not like she could blame her.  Jaune was quite the wonderful boy, she’d had quite a few dreams about him as well.

Though… speaking of the boy, her eyes glanced over at his resting figure.  The soft silver light of the moon illuminated his lithe figure.  As her eyes trailed down from his face, to his chest she felt a knot grow in her throat.  Apparently Pyrrha hadn’t been the only one to have an erotic dream that night, with only the moon’s light casting upon him she could still make out his impressive mast standing at full attention.  

Once more she had that sickly thick feeling bundle in her chest, her breathing grew heavy.  Without thinking she slid off her bed, with light steps she made her way over to him..

Activating her semblance the world grew still. Her core grew slick as she drew closer, trickles of warm juices began to run down her inner thigh.  Before she knew it she was already by his side, her hand gingerly pressed against his thick hard member.  Even covered by his rather soft onesie she could tell just how massive it was, excitement began to boil in her core.  

As her gaze fell to his slumbering face she felt herself awash with shame.  Was she about to do this?  This was an invasion of privacy!  Jaune would never do that to her… but… but this could be her only chance… the only times he’d ever get to actually see it.  Then she looked back towards his towering member, she was so very weak.  Pushing past her hesitation she slipped her right hand up his surprisingly firm chest.  Her fingers slowly pinched upon the zipper, the zipper that held her long desired treasure.  

And without even the slightest bit of hesitation or a second thought she slid the metallic key downwards.  As she slowly pulled on the last lock to her goal a thought occurred to her, how was she moving something even when time was stopped?  How could she still hear the sound of the zipper coming down?  She’d have to investigate later, but for now, for now she had a prize to unbox.  

Her heart throbbed in her heaving breast as her goal came into sight, finally she’d pulled that darned thing all the way.  She wanted to enjoy this, wanted to really let the moment sink in.  Bit by bit, she continued.  First her gaze fell upon tufts of unsheared golden fur, “Oh!”  He was as voluminous in the lower section as he was up top.  She’d… she’d love to run her nose across it, take a moment to really enjoy his scent.  

As she continued her venture she felt her boxers wedge into her quivering pussy, she would need to change after this.  Finally she reached the very tip, and with one last pull she allowed it to spring free.  She felt as if she’d used her semblance on herself, her mind went blank as everything stood still.  There it was, in all it’s massive glory, “Could… would… would it fit?”  She couldn’t help but tremble at the sight, both in awe and fear at the mighty shaft that stood at hopefully full attention in front of her.

She couldn’t help but feel in awe of how mighty it was, but at the same time, the very thought of trying to slide it inside of her frightened her.  She would need to practice, need to get ready for when the time came.  But!  That was not why she was here, no she was here to… to… to help her leader!  Yes!  That’s why she’d come this far, he must have been in so much pain, so she as his faithful teammate, had to do her duty and help… help relieve his stress… yes… right that’s what she was doing.  This was for him, this wasn’t for her…  right.  At least that’s what she told herself.  

Once she’d taken the zipper to the very end she had decided on repositioning herself.  Laying herself between his legs, she allowed herself to really get close up and personal with hopefully her future husband’s mighty… p… penis.  She felt her face flush hot at the thought of using the word!  Still… something was odd, she’d tested it before but she could definitely taste things even with time frozen.  But apparently she was also able to smell them, her nose was assaulted by a thick strong musk, one that was mixed with the scent of spice.  That in itself had answered a question that was at the back of her mind, did he shampoo his pubic hairs?  The answer was apparently a strong yes!  

Still… it was impressive, impressive with how even after he’d spent nearly 25 minutes in the shower he still had this strong… powerful… tantalizing… invigorating odor to him!  Pressing her nose forward she pressed herself between his thick heavy sack, and his impressive… massive… gorging c...c...cock… yes that’s what this was!  She felt his flesh move against her touch, she’d almost jumped back when she realized that it hadn’t been as hard as she thought.  Instead she felt warmth, felt his touch against her face.  This… this was good… she’d been worried about how well this would turn out.  But as she took in deep strong breaths she knew it was going to be amazing.  Burying her nose against the base of his penis, she allowed herself the time to take in his scent.  She was practically marinating in it, and she loved every last second.

Her instincts took control of her actions, without realizing it she’d already brought the tip of her tongue to the slit at the head of his massive cock.  Before she could stop herself she’d already moved in to get a taste, running her pink muscle across his sensitive glands, scooping up bits of frozen precum as she dug into the tiny hole.  Once she’d finished she took the moment to savor his thick and natural flavors.  She’d read that most women hated the taste, but she found herself becoming addicted to the salty tangy flavor.  

Once she’d pulled back she took the time to admire the view in front of her.  “I can’t believe I’m doing this… it’s… it’s so wonderful.”  She wanted him, wanted to feel so very full, wanted to slide that thick hard cock between her needy pussy.  She could feel her womb tighten at the thought, begging for her to mount him and breed herself on her unsuspecting love.  

However, she still had enough self restraint, it was too early for that.  She couldn’t let herself be carried away… though… though she could help him out a little right?  He’d been there for her from the very beginning, it would only be right if she were to… were to help him get off.  Just… look how hard… and pent up he must have been.  Right, she was just being a good friend… a good… a good follower!  Yes that’s what she was doing…

WIth her final bits of self control crumbling before her she took the time to move forward.  Once more she placed her nose between his cock and balls allowing his scent to invade her nose.  She couldn’t get enough of it!  She hadn’t realized just how amazing scents could be till today, but here she was stuffing her face into her beloved man’s balls like a… a… a horny little slut… “Ahhh~”  She felt her pussy clench at the thought alone, her body shook with excitement in response.  “I… I’m a dirty… I’m a dirty little slut.”  That crumbling self control was gone, and now only her desires leaked out.  

“I want you to breed me… I want you to breed me!  Breed Pyrrha!  Breed CIel!  Breed Reese!  Breed Penny!  Breed Velvet!  Breed Weiss!  Break all the other girls!”  Her right hand moved to the base of his cock, she swore that the hot burning member throbbed at her touch, but that wasn’t possible.  Her left hand moved between her thighs, slipping between her tight boxers her fingers moved along her plump moist vulva.  Unable to control herself any longer, consumed by his thick musk, she moved her hands in tandem.

Her dainty thin fingers ran along her plump lips squeezing and grinding back and forth.  She could feel herself growing slicker and slicker.  Her nose buried deep between his massive cock and heavy balls she continued to breath in his thick scent.  Her right hand continued to run up and down his thick heavy meaty fat cock, pumping him over and over running her fingers across his thick heavy veins.  Her brain could only think of breeding, could only think of pleasuring the man before her, even if he wouldn’t feel it.  But she did anyways, placing her lips against his thick, full balls she placed several heavy and hearty kisses against them.  From time to time she dragged her tongue across his sweaty savoury orbs.  

She wanted more and more, when her tongue wasn’t enough she wrapped her lips around one of his impressive sacks.  Dragging her tongue against the precious balls of flesh she began to gently suck on them.  Her pumping grew faster and faster, while her fingers continued to explore her nether regions.  SQUELCH SQUELCH SQUELCH   Over and over she ran her thin digits through her plump pussy.  Her fingers began to explore her thin hole, finally penetrating her needy little slit.  She could feel her pussy suck and clench around her fingers, she needed something bigger!  She needed his cock in her, she needed to be bred!  She wanted him to do her, to do so to so many others!  The thought of all of the girls riding this member, while the others watched invaded her mind!  The thought of him putting those nasty girls, those nasty insulting girls that liked to put him down in their place.  For him to have them face down ass up, this MIGHTY cock plunging in and out of their holes as they begged for more, begged for him to breed them like the dirty little breeding sows that they were.  Those thoughts invaded her mind like never before.

She couldn’t believe herself, couldn’t believe how easily she felt she was being corrupted!  But it wasn’t just the breeding!  No! NO! That would imply she only wanted his cock in her!  She wanted other things, wanted to run her tongue through Pyrrha and Ciel’s pussy, to eat them out and savor their flavors.  She wanted to stretch out Weiss and Reese, bend them in positions that only their thin, gorgeous, and lithe bodies could handle.  She wanted to grind with Penny, wanted to get tribal with Velvet!  

Her inner desires burned through, she’d been a good girl!  She was allowed to have these absolutely nasty thoughts!  She wanted more and more AND MORE!  Her suction grew harder till she felt her jaw grow tired, he was so impressive!  So mighty!  Even as she continued to invade her own body, with three fingers invading her needy pussy.  She found herself gazing upon his manly mane, the tufts of blonde hair that called for her to bury her nose into.  Scooting forward she placed her face against his sternum, dragging her nose against his thick fur.  He smelled so good!  The harsh fragrance from his shampoo hit her nose at the same time as his thick heavy musk, built up from the heat of the night.  “Oh god!  I’m so bad~  I’m such a bad little girl.”

She couldn’t stop herself, her cervix opened and closed as she continued to attack her own pussy.  She couldn’t stop, there was no way she could, her juices flowed freely down her thighs, her boxers were practically drenched in her own fluids by this point.  She really couldn’t use them anymore!  It would be too embarrassing, and yet, and yet a thought occurred.  What if Jaune were to catch her like this?  What if she started time up again… oh what would he do to her?  Would he push her down, breed her?  Use her massive ugly tits like… like handles as his thick hard cocked pumped in and out of her nasty… naughty...needy… pussy?  The thought was tempting!  She wanted to do it!  But she knew she couldn’t, she just couldn’t!  She was too scared, absolutely terrified!

Still the thought was there!  The thought that was pushed back into the depths of her mind!  For now though, she felt herself hit her climax, her body shivered and convulsed, her juices oozed down her thighs, her boxers drenched and unwearable at this point.  She fell forward, her chest heaving up and down as she did her best to breath, her nose buried deep against his pelvis.  

As her post orgasm clarity hit her, her face began to burn hot, burned so damn hot.  Her eyes snapped open as she pulled away, nearly tripping as her drenched underwear clung to her body.  Embarrassment consumed her at a realization of what she’d just done.  “I… I… no!  No!  I’m sorry!”  Running towards her dresser she grabbed a clean pair of boxers, she couldn’t believe what she’d just done, what she’d just THOUGHT!  It was… it was so bad!  Burying her face into her clean underwear for a moment she did her best to sling her moist used set down her slick wet thighs.  With a wet SCHLOP her boxers hit the ground.  

She shivered at the sound, her body growing hot as her embarrassment consumed her once more.  Once she’d slipped on a fresh pair, she’d need to make sure that he was fixed as well.  As she began to zip him up once more she couldn’t help but give him one last gift.  Pressing her lips against the tip of his cock she gave him one last kiss.  Once she’d finished setting him up she made sure to hide her… her shameful piece of cloth at the very bottom of her clothing hamper.  

Gently she climbed into her sheets and closed her eyes.  Her power over the world began to vanish, and she’d been prepared to fall asleep when she heard a loud thrashing sound and… and what sounded like a powerful squirting noise!

“NNNNGH!♥!!”  Her eyes snapped open as she stared at the cause of the sound, Jaune was twitching, his upper body jolted upright.  Her eyes glanced downwards as his loud moaning filled the otherwise quiet dorm room.  SPURT SPURT SPURT SPURT!  Her face grew red hot as she realized what was happening!  All the feedback from when she'd been stroking him was finally happening.  “Ah! AH AH!”  Under the silver light of the moon she could clearly see his cock twitching and spurting out thick globs as his onesie became stained in his thick seed.  

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry!”  She hadn’t meant for that to happen!  In her own lust she’d forgotten about it!  Now the boy of her affection was having quite possibly the strongest orgasm he’d ever had, and it… it was all because of her!  A sense of pride filled her chest, but was quickly replaced with shame as she saw the distraught face in front of her.  Her instincts screamed to move and comfort him!  But… but she couldn’t bring herself to move, she couldn’t let him know she was awake.  Instead she watched him, watched as he stared in panic at his own sputtering cock the obvious shame built upon his face… it did things to her... things she didn’t want to admit.

“Hah hah hah…”  His panting echoed and sunk into her ears, it was… it was doing things to her.  She could feel her core heat up once more.  “I… why… I… no….”  Despite how terrible she felt, that small tinge of pride still filled her chest.  “Why… I… no… I… they can’t see this… they… they’d hate me…  I can’t… I cant believe I had a… wet dream about all of them… why…”  She nearly flinched when he turned towards her.  “I’m sorry May… I can’t… I can’t believe I… to you…”

Had he been having a wet dream?!  Was she in it?!  Was that why he was apologizing?!  “You… I’m… I’m such a bad friend.”  Even with her eyes closed shut as they were, she could still make out the sounds of him heading to the bathroom, obviously to get changed and to clean off… off that thick… stain on his onesie… that rich… fresh…  and like that the world stopped once more.

Once more she got up, making her way around him she quickly unzipped his onesie, unable to resist the treat in front of her!  Once she’d gotten the zipper all the way down she was treated with his cum coated cock.  She remembered the previous embarrassment!  Remembering how bad she felt!  But how could she resist?!  Quickly she moved, running her tongue along his still thick hard shaft she lapped up his thick honeyed cum.  “Schow good!  You taste schow bery good!”  She couldn’t stop it, she couldn’t stop till she consumed every last bit.  And there was just so much!  So very much very much.  For what felt like forever she continued to lap away, consuming and gulping down as mucha s she could.  Tasting his flavors so directly had nearly lit her fire again, but she needed to control herself.  

Once she’d made sure to have consumed as much as she could, even going as far as to lick what she could off of his onesie she went back to bed.  Letting time return she heard him nearly fall over, “Wha?!”  He’d apparently grown weak kneed with her previous endeavors.  “Wha… what is wrong with me?”  His voice released a hushed whisper, but she could still hear it, hear the embarrassment in his voice.  It… it was so delectable.  She… she was awakening tos something new.  She wanted more… but for now she’d sleep, close her eyes and rest.

[bumbleklee]

Honey (Kaeya x M!Reader)

CONTENT WARNING: Internalized homophobia, cursing, alcohol/drunkenness, fist fight scene and mentions of blood

Before Reading: this one-shot uses the f-slur a few times but please keep in mind that I am a lesbian who has been called this word many times in the past so I am reclaiming it through writing. like in the content warning, this story is basically all internalized homophobia so if this subject makes you wary - please don’t read! story is under the cut for sensitive topics

You remember your first love dearly. It was Jean and you were thirteen. She was your best friend and you loved her beauty more than anything in the world. She was kind to you even when you were cruel to her to impress your male friends. It was hard not to fall in love with how she loved you.

When you were sixteen, you dated Jean. Your first kiss was with her, you found comfort in her. You even imagined spending the rest of your life in Mondstadt married to her. Unknowing to you at the time, Jean became your shield. You paraded her around to shut down rumors and broke her heart to save yours. You aren’t expecting her sigh of relief when you begin to question if she was the one for you.

You break up with Jean when you’re eighteen. She was tired and you knew she deserves someone better. You never stopped loving Jean.

When the rumors swirl again, you try to play them off. People wondered why you and Jean had broken up - were you hurting her? Was she cheating on you? Were you cheating on her?

Of course not.

Were you gay?

You didn’t understand what it meant to be gay, so you couldn’t be gay. 

Kaeya is open about love. He says he loves anyone - boys and girls and every other gender. He was proud yet you still didn’t understand. How could someone love so many different people when there were rules? You want to help Kaeya realize this - help him realize he’s only supposed to love girls.

For the next year, you examine Kaeya closely. You accompany him to bars after work and watch him leave with a plethora of different people. One night, he finds solace at the table with a male knight whose name you couldn’t remember. You can only watch their lips press against each other for a moment before retreating to the bar.

“How insensitive,” You mumble, catching the eye of Diluc. He finishes drying a glass and fills it with wine, pressing it towards you gently.

“Are you jealous?”

Your eyes snap up and you let out a breath of shaky laughter. “Jealous? Your brother is sick in the head - he needs to convert before it’s too late.”

Diluc is tight-lipped. To him, you look sick in the head. His relationship with his brother may not have been the best but never would Diluc resort to such hateful thoughts. Kaeya was, well, Kaeya. You stare at him, waiting for him to say something - say anything.

“I can’t believe you’re defending that faggot.”

With a quick movement, Diluc pulls your drink away and it’s hastily thrown in your face. The alcohol drips into your eyes and you seethe.

“Leave. And don’t come back.”

“Gladly.”

He just didn’t understand.

You expect Kaeya to avoid you like the plague after your outburst at the tavern yet the next morning he’s glued to your side at work. His demeanor is off but when you look at him, he smiles.

Anytime you try to bring up your concerns about Kaeya’s sexuality to him, he simply laughs and tells you how funny you are. You get angrier each day and start to spend free time in the church praying to Lord Barbatos to please help Kaeya.

You speak to your parents about your actions and they’re proud of you. Especially your old man. He’s withering away by the day but is still conscious enough to tell you your hair is getting too long - too femine - and you need to cut it. You appreciate him.

Jean is still your rock. She knows more about you than you do.

When you realize how pretty Kaeya looks during the Windblume Festival, Jean is the first person you tell. You’re panicking, scared you’ve come down with a fever and are having hallucinations. Jean just rubs your back and tells you you’re fine.

“You like him,” She says.

“No, I don’t. I can’t.”

Her smile falters and she makes you look at her in the eyes, “It’s okay to like him.”

You pull away from Jean, angry you might say something you don’t mean. You stay far away from Kaeya and Jean for the rest of the festival, denying the frazzled thoughts that are swarming your mind. When Amber confesses to you at the end of the festival, you pull her into a storage closet and kiss her until you can see clearly again.

“We’re in love,” You tell Jean days later. She looks up from the paperwork on her desk.

“It’s been a week.”

She thinks you’re joking. “We’re soulmates,” You continue and Jean’s soft laughter stops. You wait for her to deny it, to protest against your newfound relationship, but she never does. She just sighs and waves you back to Amber.

On a particularly bad day at work, Jean surprises the knights with food and drinks from The Cat’s Tail. You drink so much that you forget you’re there with Amber and by the time you remember, she’s stormed off to find someone else. Instead, you stay near Kaeya as the taller man tells you a story about an adventure.

It’s fine until his arm loops around your waist and your senses overwhelm you again. You shove Kaeya away and his back hits the bar counter. The tavern grows quiet and Kaeya quickly makes a loud joke about how horrible you were at dancing. You pretend you don’t see the hurt in his eye.

All you can hear is the blood pounding in your ears.

You retreat to the table Jean is sitting at and Kaeya pulls Albedo towards him. The chief alchemist, for once, looks excited. Your chest tightens and you stare at the pair with a heavy gaze.

“Albedo is a fag, too,” You start causing Jean to sigh sadly, “He’s a fag and he’s all over my -”

You stop abruptly. What were you going to say? The word that lingers in your mind makes you feel sick to your stomach. As soon as you got home, you were going to repent for even thinking of it. Jean touches your arm lightly, “Y/N…”

You pull your arm away, “Nothing. Nevermind.”

Three months later, Kaeya kisses you.

It’s short and sweet and you’re rambling about how you think him and Jean would make a cute couple. His lips are soft and taste like honey and you feel like you’re flying.

Soaring through the wind until suddenly you’re not.

You hit the ground.

It hurts.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” You scream, trying to wipe your mouth with the back of your hand. This was horrible - it was all wrong.

“Please,” Kaeya begs, “Shut up.”

You run from him. Your feet take you far into the Whispering Woods and your hands press on your temple with so much force you think you’re going to break. Everything you knew, everything you believed in, was flying out the door and you couldn’t grab onto it. You’re sick - you have to be. There’s no other reason why the only want in your head is Kaeya’s lips on yours again.

You scratch at your skin, curl into yourself and scream.

Kaeya avoids you and you avoid him. You thought this would solve everything - if Kaeya wasn’t around you, he wouldn’t be able to taint you. Yet anytime you looked into his office and saw emptiness, your tongue ached for that sweet taste of honey.

You miss him so much and one day, your emotions get the better of you. You wait for him to stumble out of the tavern and when he does, you grab him. Your mouth gaps like a fish out of water, trying to formulate the right words to say to him.

“What?” His voice is cold, venomous, “Going to call me a faggot again and run away?”

Your heart breaks, “We can get through this together -”

Kaeya snaps his arms away, “You still don’t fucking get it! There’s nothing to get through, Y/N! I’m who I am and I am so fucking tired of waiting around for you to realize who you are!”

“I hate you.”

The words tumble from your lips and Kaeya’s fist collides with your cheek. You try to fight back but Kaeya is stronger. He shoves you down, straddling your hips and clenching your shirt in his hair. His eye is filled with bitter tears and he lands another punch to your face.

“I’m sorry that you were taught to hate love,” Kaeya continues, “I’m sorry you can’t accept that I love myself and you hate yourself!”

Your hands claw at Kaeya’s face, managing to tear off his eyepatch and reveal his blinded eye. Kaeya lifts you by the hold on your shirt only to slam you back down into the concrete. By now, there’s a small crowd of drunken knights surrounding you both.

“You’re mental!” You cry out, “You need serious help or you’re going to go to Hell! I don’t want you to go to Hell, Kaeya!”

Kaeya gives you one last punch, this one to your nose, and gets off your. You feel warm blood trickle past your lips and your head is pounding. He looks at you with an expression that makes you start crying yourself.

“I’ll go to Hell if it’ll save me from you.”

It takes you twenty minutes to get up and finally tread home. Your parents are already asleep and when you look in the mirror, you see the dried blood covering your lips and chin. Your nose hurt to the touch.

You fall into a deeper hole than you ever thought you would. You stay in bed for three days straight, blaming it on a cold, until Jean shows up at your door to drag you back into the sunlight.

You don’t feel worthy to be seen by the sun.

She takes you on a walk through Spingvale and you sit in front of the lake. You feel embarrassed, your hands folding on top of each other.

“We have to talk about what happened.”

You don’t look at Jean. Your shoulders tremble and you lean in closer to your knees. “I’ve been trying to push...it...away for so long,” You start. Your voice is a hushed whisper and you hardly recognize it. “But it’s like there’s this flashing light that keeps reminding me.”

“It’s because it’s who you are.”

“That’s the problem.”

Jean is quiet for a moment before reaching over and placing her hand over yours.

“My parents told me growing up that love was between a man and a woman and that Lord Barbatos would punish the souls who didn’t obey that. I don’t...don’t want to get punished, Jean.”

Your hands are shaking. Jean rubs your thumb, “Lord Barbatos would never punish anyone for being in love.” You feel shameful again. “But you don’t love Amber.”

You didn’t. You truly didn’t. In fact, you had forgotten about her during your depressive episode. You felt horrible - you had hurt so many people just to hide from the truth. Tears well in your eyes again and you don’t know what to do.

“Listen,” Jean says comfortingly. You finally look up to meet her tired eyes - the same eyes from back when you were eighteen. “I’ll talk to Amber for you. I think you owe someone else a visit.”

Without another word, you took off. You hoped Kaeya was around and not on a commission because if you didn’t say what you needed to say now, you never would. Thankfully, you find him sitting at his desk at the Headquarters. You stand in the doorway and clutch at your sleeves, your heart pounding.

In that moment you realized you couldn’t do it alone - you couldn’t be yourself alone.

Without someone guiding you through this, you would fall into old habits and never progress. If you continued to shove your truth far, far away then you would lose Kaeya forever.

“Are you just going to stare at me?” Kaeya finally asks. His voice is much kinder than days prior.

“I love you.”

Time freezes and you stare at each other. The words linger in the air but you know there’s no taking them back. Kaeya was expecting another half-assed biblical chant about how you could change him. He was never expecting a love confession.

You realize you’ve been moving closer to Kaeya when his hand reaches out to touch your cheek. He rises from his desk and leans in, pressing his lips to yours ever so slightly. As soon as you taste honey, you feel sparks fly.

You lived in a world of hatred and darkness, waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel to arise. And Kaeya was that light.

[sin-of-jess]

Mt. Lady

Type: Smut

I’ve been wanting to do some lesbian action for a while, and honestly she seems like the perfect starter!

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"But Y/N!!  This is my last outfit and I'm on patrol tonight!"  Mt. Lady complains to me, wearing her signature pro-hero costume that was horribly singed and cut up nearly beyond repair; one of the legs wasn't even attached to the suit and she had someone's mid-length skirt on over her costume for some reason. I can't help when my eyes go to her chest before her face, but I still frown at her, "I'm sorry Mt. Lady, but I'm incredibly busy.  Can't you ask one of the others on the floor?" She pouts as she cocks one of her hips to the side, "You do better work than the others by far, no one knows this style of fabric like you do!"  I roll my eyes, my gaze reaching her chest again before meeting her face again.  She gets a grin on her face and leans across my table, jutting her chest out and making me realize there was a tear in the fabric underneath her left breast.  "Can't you pause the others and do mine really fast?"  She asks in a flirty tone.

I'm ashamed of how long it took me to tear my eyes away from the exposed skin of her underboob to meet her face, though I had a hard time meeting her direct gaze, "I can't just stop the commitments to these hero's to fix yours, it's not even a quick fix!" She pushes her chest out even more, and I realize she's doing her usual ploy of feminine innuendo to get her way.  I didn't think she'd use those tactics on a woman like me, but I wasn't going to complain about the sexy sight in front of me.  "What if I make it worth your while to do it?" I raise my eyebrow and finally lock eyes with her, "What could you possibly propose to get me to do that?"  It felt like a stupid question, but I was genuinely curious as to what she had up her damaged sleeve. She sways her hips dramatically as she walks over to the door of my office, making a flourish to lock the door before coming back to where she was, "I could stay here naked while I wait." She said it so nonchalantly that it stole the air from my lungs.  I cough and drop what was in my hands, looking up at her in surprise, "You'd what?!" She starts fingering at the spot on her chest that's torn, pulling the material up to show more of her voluptuous tits.  "I saw you trying to sneak a peek, what harm would it look to let you get your fill and I get my suit done?"  I'm speechless, my eyes first moving to all the damage of her costume while lingering on her curves.  "Would you like to see why I had to wear this awful skirt?"  She asks me, unzipping it from the side and pushing it off her hips.  I don't see it hit the floor, my widened eyes glued to the obscenely placed cut in her suit that let her pussy hang free. "I uh..."  I stammer, licking my lips as I start unabashed at her hairless mound.   "Is that a yes?"  She asks me in a tone that meant she already knew the answer.  I nod my head.  "Well, then I guess you'll need this then!"  She pulls the suit down in one fluid motion, years of wearing the style costume making her use to taking it off.  Her entire body is free for me to see, and it takes me a few tries to take the suit out of her hands with my focus on memorizing every part of her glorious body.   It takes me a moment to pull my eyes away to start working on her suit, taking off the fabric that's unfixable and cutting it off.  While I rummage through my storage to find the material that matches her costume she busies herself grabbing a chair from the corner of the room and sitting it across from my desk.  I'm able to take a few minutes to start measuring the fabric and getting it prepped to put on the suit, but I can't focus on much once the hero across from me gets fidgety.   At first, she's just rubbing her hands along her chest, almost intentionally avoiding her nipples that were probably hard from the brisk temperature of my office.  I roll my chair over to the specially made sewing matching beside my desk to start shaping the fabric I cut, and facing away from the woman gives me a moment to catch my breath.  It's like my cheeks are on fire, and it's hard to focus on the work at hand.   "Are you interested in woman, Miss. Y/N?"  She asks, swirling her fingers around her nipples as close as she can without directly touching them.   I stumble over my words as I roll back to my desk and am greeted with Mt. Lady's legs now splayed out in front of me.  "I uh.. I am actually."  I don't know how deeply she wants me to delve into my sexuality, but the situation at hand leads me to believe she only cares if I'm sexually attracted to her. "You know what's the best part of women?  They know how to touch me properly."  She tells me as one of her hands traces symbols around her stomach and down towards her crotch.  "Men can be enthusiastic and experienced ones have the hang of it, but a woman knows where she likes to be touched and can learn fast on how to do it on another,"  She continues her one-sided conversation as she starts sliding her finger up and down her moistening petals.   "I, I wouldn't know..."  I awkwardly reply, my hands struggling to work due to my shaking.   Her eyes flicker up to mine, "What do you mean?" I shift in my seat uncomfortably, "Well, I've never had the chance to... to try..." Her eyes turn mischievous as she slowly rises from her chair, "So you've never pleased a woman, or,"  Her eyes travel down and back up to me, "or pleased by one?"  I meekly shake my head no and lean forward to focus on the project at hand.  My focus is brought back up to her though when her form comes into view as she climbs onto the heavy wooden desk.  "Do you want to right now?" She shifts her body so that her pussy is at the edge of my desk, feet perched on either side of her as she spread her knees out.  I lick my lips again, dropping everything in my hands and beginning to reach out.  I hesitate only for a moment, looking up at her and being greeted by her chest being more visible than her face.  It was the first time I realized how tall my desk was. Mt. Lady grabs the back of my head and guides me closer to her wet center, "Come on baby girl, make me feel good," 'Always thinking of herself,' I think to myself before leaning in to dive into her core.  It's sweet and there's a lot of it, giving me plenty of time to enjoy her flavor.  I start by swirling my tongue around her folds, collecting her juices, and swallowing them greedily.  She lets out breathy moans as she lets me use her to experiment.  As her whines get more frequent I decide to focus my attention on trying to make her cum.  I latch my lips around her clit and swirl it around, using my fingers to mimic what I do to my own pussy when alone.   I had to admit I had thought about this before.  She was the hottest hero at the moment and she was loud and proud about how sexy she was.  Seeing her on TV made my insides clench up, and I couldn't believe that I now had her writhing in pleasure on my work desk.  "Suck tighter put a finger in me too..."  She moans out, her hips instantly pushing into me the second I slide my finger in.  It takes a moment to get down pat, but once I can properly coordinate sucking her clit and fingering her I add a second finger.   In hindsight, she was being far too loud, but I was drunk on the intoxicating flavor of her and let her do what she wanted as long as I could be buried in her pussy.  She suddenly grips my hair, pulling me deeper into her, "I'm gonna cum, make me cum, Y/N!"  She says as she pushes into me so hard it barely gives me room to breathe.  I piston my fingers into her as I suck on her clit and swirl my tongue at the same time, my reward being drowned in her juices. When I finally release her clit I'm breathing heavy, my face from nose to chin soaked in her fluids.  Her cheeks and chest are flush as she looks down at me dazed, "You should do that again,"

[vintage-bentley]

You explained it so eloquently and easy to follow and yet I know there's people who would look at our opinion and label us as the bigots for having those boundaries in the first place. Gay men can get away with not being forced to sleep with people they aren't attracted to but as soon as lesbians say the same thing, we get labeled as some type of phobic person. It's been frustrating as a lesbian to see the difference between how lesbian and bisexual women are treated in the community versus how gay or bisexual men get treated. This also extends to the content. I'm sure you've seen the difference in reception of shows like First Kill versus shows out there about m/m couples. W/W content gets all these high standards and expectations and people say it's "honest criticism" when the same standards aren't used on the m/m content. At this point I can't even tell the difference between how straight people would treat me as a lesbian versus how my supposed own community treats me. But it gives me a little hope when I find people who also feel these frustrations because then I know I'm not alone in my experience and I have to believe that reason will eventually win.

Thank you! I'm guessing you're referring to this?

(Warning, this got long because I have Lots Of Thoughts)

It's sad, but you're right. Somehow it's become the popular take within our own "community" that boundaries are bad.

I wouldn't say that gay men are able to avoid the "cotton ceiling" rhetoric, since there's the "boxer ceiling" too. It's just that this has been happening to lesbians for much longer, and since nobody helped us fight back, homophobes felt emboldened to target gay men too. To be completely honest I'm not sure things would be as bad as they are now if people had just listened to lesbians.

Still, even though it does happen to gay men too, I agree that women (specifically lesbians) are still the most affected. I genuinely think the TQ+ community hates us, or at least dislikes us. They really do treat us just like regular straight homophobes do. Then again, I think lots of them literally are just straight homophobes who've convinced themselves that they can change gender and become gay.

I'll put my thoughts on the response to First Kill under a read more since again, it got long.

As far as the response to lesbian/bisexual woman content goes, I'll be honest and say that I'm probably not in the best place to judge right now. On my old blog I was following a ton of artists and blogs from different fandoms I'd been in since making the account, so I saw a fair bit of response to whatever new thing was out. I still haven't gotten around to combing through the blogs I was following there and following more people here, so I'm really only following the few blogs I remembered when making this one. I also followed a bunch of tags before and am following none here because I want to be at peace lol.

What I'm getting at is that I used to be seeing widespread response to media so I'd be able to see how people reacted to different things, but now I'm really just seeing a small circle of people. So while I could easily say that I saw a shit ton of Good Omens fan art before even knowing what it was, but am seeing hardly any First Kill fan art on my dash, and could blame it on different attitudes towards M/M and F/F...it's more likely that I was following far more people than I am now.

However, just to compare the little that I have seen...Good Omens was all "yay queer representation!!!!" despite nothing being remotely explicit. Our Flag Means Death seemed to have SO MANY articles about how amazing and "queer" it was. But I saw an article about First Kill is falling into the trope of teen lesbian vampires or something?? As if that's not a very niche genre.

The show is still fairly new so I'm not expecting fireworks and fanfare just yet...but I honestly wouldn't be surprised if it didn't get the same attention and praise that OFMD or even GO did. Despite doing OFMD's kiss scene far more often and intensely, and GO's star-crossed-lovers trope as actual star-crossed-lovers instead of star-crossed-Not Gay Best Friends Who Could Be Queer (on tumblr/twitter, not on screen) But Certainly Not Gay.

Here's what came up when I searched the show up, make of this what you will.

Fairly positive, but I'm just skimming through the top right article and here's an excerpt;

Like First Kill, the queer love story [Heartstopper] was a whole season drop with only eight episodes. In Heartstopper, however, with its dreamy, melodic music and palpable longing, the romance felt tangible. Unlike First Kill it was able to pull viewers wholeheartedly into Nick and Charlie's love story in the most breathtaking way.

You really feel their wants, desires and their connection. You ache for their yearning so badly that some have to watch between laced fingers pressed over eyes because their agony and angst is just too much for some. (Us, we are some).

Yet despite the mortal peril and the forbidden nature of Jules and Cal's romance – the ingredients for a hot and steamy love story – it's just not believable.

So what I'm getting is that soft sanitised boys in love set to "dreamy" music = believable love story...but horny teenage girls in love = not believable. Ok. Sure.

The idea that Calliope and Juliette got together too fast is a critique I see a lot about this show...and to some extent I get it. Maybe people were going in hoping for a slow burn and are disappointed. It did move fairly fast, but I was okay with it. Personally, I went in wanting F/F romance so I got what I came for. It was nice to just be guaranteed a love story without dealing with all the tension first. With gay romance I'm very used to tons of build up despite straight romance happening right away, so it was nice to see a gay relationship get the straight treatment. And I really don't see what's so unrealistic about teenagers being quick to move things along...that's just the teen love trope for you.

I also don't get why First Kill, a vampire/monster hunter show, needs to be "realistic" about its romance. People certainly didn't care about realism when it was Jim from OFMD being canonically they/themmed instead of being a realistic woman disguising as a man, which is arguably the bigger stray from reality than horny teenagers (and a sexist one!).

People make excuses for OFMD all the time ("it's just a silly pirate show, they didn't care about historical accuracy! Look at the costumes!") but are harping on the fantasy show for being unrealistic? I can't help but feel that part of the enchantment with OFMD is that it's men, and part of the "honest criticism" with First Kill is that it's women. People seem to like F/F content much less than they do M/M. Ao3 tags prove it.

Despite the seemingly higher standards placed on First Kill, I've luckily seen plenty positive feedback about it! But just like I was curious what the reaction to OFMD would've been had it been about women...I'm very curious about what the reaction to First Kill would've been had it been about men. I almost wonder if OFMD wouldn't have been as big as it was/is, and First Kill would have taken its place.