#i am very tired and my job is exhausting me and not off until tuesday…. bday vibes….. throwing up
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#really heartbreaking hearing the way my friend’s mom spoke about trans youth ln. especially when her 15yo came out to me last summer.#:(#my whole heart#she came out to me the day she met my ex gf#and she came out to my ex before me. she’d never socialized with an adult masc and i think it gave her some hope yknow#i’m the only one in the family realm who knows !!!! i love that kid so much !!!! i want to be a positive influence for her always#it’s weighing on me!#i am very tired and my job is exhausting me and not off until tuesday…. bday vibes….. throwing up#i really want to do something nice for my mom but i can’t land on what yet. i’ll end up surprising her in the coming weeks#i’m thinking about returning to campus and all things related to#school…. creativity is kicking up…. insurance starts in two weeks…. good news coming#open call hunt starts tomorrow#goodnight
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So there are a lot of things I like about my job, and there are a lot of things that I don't. Obviously the main thing is it's part time in an outbound call center and I don't have option to go full-time (not that I would anyway, it's a freaking call center and I'm already going insane on just 30 hours), so that's definitely an issue, but on the inverse, requesting time off doesn't have to be 2 weeks in advance-- It only has to be 2 days. So naturally, Monday, I decided I was going to take today, Thursday, off for a mental health break. Request goes through without issue, everything should be fine and dandy until I survived to Thursday right?
And then of course, my internet service decided last second it was going to do all day maintenance, not Thursday, no, because that would be too cosmically convenient. Nope. They decided to do it Wednesday. And I got no notification, because the text that was sent to me Tuesday never came through. And of course, Tuesday night was the night I decided to splurge on myself and get Olive garden and a personal pie, and Wednesday morning I decided to get a coffee, right before my work shift, and right before I came home, clocked in, then watched as my internet subsequently failed immediately as I was logging in.
Did I mention I'm buying new tires? So yeah, it's not minus $700 like I initially planned for (no work Thursday + cost of tires), but minus $850, and an unexcused work absence on top of that.
So yeah. Another example of the universe watching me decide, for once, it's safe to splurge on myself, I've been good, I've been working hard, I've been saving well, and then going, "but what if we immediately incurred an unexpected cost/ income loss on you. Lol." The frequency at which this happens is uncomfortably consistent. I get a raise, I have to start paying a food bill. I buy some figurines for my collection, I dent my bumper and break my tail light. I graduate college debt/ loan free, I have to pay more than half my income in rent, thus subsequently needing to take on more work hours. My sperm donor goes on vacation in a different hemisphere for a week and a half, and before I can even think about taking a mini vacation myself without him breathing down my neck, my older sibling gets covid, thus quarantining me at home as well due to being exposed to him.
At the very least, I can be thankful I didn't buy the tablet I was thinking of buying for on-the-go digital drawing. Then I would have been down over $1,000. All in just one week-- not even that, over 3-ish days.
That being said, I haven't taken time off for myself in God knows how long, and despite the unfortunate nature of having to call out yesterday, thus, putting a mark on my attendance record that I tried to avoid by getting time off approved Thursday anyway, it's sort of been giving me an opportunity to think, when I've been too busy or exhausted to do so recently. The thinking is only just now starting, but I'm starting to for once actually ponder objectively what I'm doing with my time and energy, and where I want my life to go from here.
Do I really need to stay in this job until I find full-time work? Do I not have enough cushion in savings to take a break despite my sperm donor imposing unnecessary rent that's half my monthly income on me (and me wanting to maintain enough savings that I never have to come back here once I do leave)? Is my constant fear of everything going wrong the moment I don't have a job founded? Is karma real? Is it real enough that I'm going to get into a serious accident the day after I turn in my 2 weeks (because with my luck, I genuinely feel like that's what's going to happen)? Will quitting my job really give me the time and space I need to improve my portfolio? Am I psyching myself up over nothing because my hatred of my father outweighs my common and objective sense? Is my father going to increase rent out of spite like I fear if I quit, because he somehow thinks punishing me is going to encourage me to work harder on finding a job as if my current lack of interviews is somehow my fault (never mind the job economy as a whole is garbage at the moment, and my particular industry is notoriously difficult to get into)? Is any potential spite or punishment from him worth it anyway? Am I the only one holding myself back (outside of financial issues, which generally is 100% traceable back to my father)? Do I keep the job even though it's only 30 hours a week, $15 an hour, and try to move out anyway?
Realistically, because I live in America, none of those above things can really happen before I gain full ownership of my car from him anyway, but with the new tires being put on as we speak, I'm going to be able to have that conversation soon. He's that kind of abuser where timing is everything in conversations. And once that car is officially in my name and not his, maybe everything else will fall into place. I just have to hope he's not going to be weird about it, but of course I know he will be, regardless of how carefully I plan on my wording and timing in approaching him, never mind the fact that I'm paying for everything on it now anyway.
I'm not sure where I'm going with this post. Sort of just following my train of thought on whatever track it goes, probably on account of the coffee. But I definitely need to take some time to just sit around and seriously think about my next steps, because I've just had my wheels spinning in mud for the past 6 months and my damn engine's about to combust. What do I need to do to make my life easier and restore some of my sanity, without putting my safety and future in jeopardy? What steps do I need to take that I haven't thought of in order to completely and safely separate from my father so I can move out without letting him know where I live or who I'm living with? How do I accomplish that without putting my younger sibling at risk since we're so close, and my dad will know that he undoubtedly knows something about my sudden disappearance?
Nothing can ever just be easy, can it? I know others have left undesirable home situations living on less or nothing, but I can't imagine leaving this place without at the very least full time work that offers health insurance. Maybe my standards are too high for myself, maybe I just have some kind of anxiety brain rot that keeps finding excuses for me to not go anywhere or do anything. I want so badly to be rid of him, It's not some brand of familial Stockholm syndrome. It's more along the lines of "if everything isn't perfect in my departure, then it will all go wrong and I'll end up back here anyway, and things will be worse."
Whatever the answer is to anything I've pondered about in this post, I think It's safe to say the current circumstances are killing me, If not physically, then definitely mentally, and emotionally I'm bleeding out.
#dylawa rambles#dylawa rants#dylawa vents#why did I type this whole thing on mobile. Am I okay. obviously the answer is no#and in case the read more doesn't work#long post
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Making the Voice quieter
(A/N): This was requested by an anon. I hope you like it!
Summary: Spencer finds out about his daughter's eating disorder, he will he react?
Warnings: Angst, discription of an eating disorder (bulemia to be more specific), discription of (binge) eating, bad body image, self hatred, abuse of pills (diet pills)
Wordcount: 2.2k
✨Masterlist✨
______________________________
Prison. Cat. Diana. All those things happened close to each other. Luckily a few months have passed since then and slowly everything settles down. Spencer is able to get his feelings sorted through, processing the events.
Ever since his imprisonment he follows a more or less strict routine, given the uncertainty coming with his job. Spencer still tries to keep it up. So is every Friday dedicated to buying the majority of groceries and needed non food articles.
Sometimes (Y/N) tags along, other days she already has plans with her friends. Her father doesn’t mind it much, he is happy to see her socializing with people her age. The two of them have one father-daughter-night in the week anyways.
“Sweetheart, I’m heading out! Did you put everything you need on the list?” He shouts into the apartment. A faint “Yes! Love you!” echoes back to him. A smile forms on the doctor’s face. Oh how he longed to hear those words from her every night while he laid in his bed, locked up for a crime he didn’t commit. “Alright, love you, too!”
Meanwhile her father has to deal with Karens being their ignorant selfs, (Y/N) is under the biggest stress she has ever been. The end of her sophomore year and suddenly every teacher thinks it’s alright to give the students a load of work in every single class.
It’s beginning to get to her head. Four essays, three projects and studying for two tests and everything is due next week. She can see herself sitting at that very desk for the whole weekend, trying to contain control of her current situation.
As (Y/N) begins to read the page in front of her again to pull any information from it, it feels like her brain shuts down. Only one thought possesses her. One thing that can assure her, make her happy again.
Her body moves automatically, into the kitchen to the fridge. Her hands grab what they can. Puddings, yogurts, bananas, apples, last night’s dinner, everything that she can carry. Then the teenager sits down at the floor and devours everything she just got out. (Y/N) doesn’t stop until she gets to this intense feeling of being full.
It seems like she snaps out of a trance. Upon seeing what she ate in the shortest time, the girl feels even worse. Quickly she tries to destroy any kind of evidence, getting the trash out, making the fridge appear more full than it is, anything.
In her panicked state she remembers the small container of pills in her room. Relief washes over (Y/N), thinking everything will be better. She takes two of them for good measurement.
With the relief also guilt takes over. What just happened wasn’t normal. But (Y/N) tells herself that she can stop any time she wants. It’s not like she is sick or something, everything is fine. It’s just her way to copy stress. A way she discovered while her father was in prison. The diet pills help her to undo her mistakes. Someone from her friend group, who is already 18, got her them from the doctor for a fair price.
Feeling calmer now, the teenager sits back at her desk. A new perception of control helps her to continue her school work. She has to get done as much as possible, because in not even half an hour (Y/N)’s best friend will be the toilet.
Spencer is completely obvious to it. Sure, he is a profiler and he noticed his daughter’s new view on eating healthy food and working out. He just assumes that (Y/N) and her friends are on a healthy trip and he doesn’t see a problem in this. On the contrary, he is happy that she wants to be good to herself and her body.
But as the weeks go on, a suspicious feeling captures him. “(Y/N)? Why is the fridge nearly empty? We got groceries last Friday and it’s only Tuesday. Did you have a party over here while I was away on the case?” Spencer enters his daughter’s room, trying to joke about it.
(Y/N) freezes. Of course she isn’t able to say that the food went bad and she threw them away, her father is meticulous regarding this subject, always checking the best before day date. “Uhm, please don’t be mad. But Alex, you know her, the short one with red hair, uhm her parents are on a business trip and she is not the best cook. So I brought her lunch and dinner over. I’m sorry for not telling you.” She looks down at the floor, not only to feign sadness but also to avoid his eyes.
The second the teenager talks Spencer knows there is something fishy. Her voice is higher and she fidget with her hands. But he writes it off as being nervous for not telling him. Ever since he is out of prison, it feels like his daughter is withholding something.
“It’s fine, Sweetheart. Just give me a heads-up beforehand, so I know to buy more groceries. What do you think about ordering something tonight? I heard from Luke that a small Chinese restaurant opened a few streets down. We can celebrate the end of the stressful phase in Sophomore year.”
It seems like (Y/N) is calculating something in her head. Spencer knows exactly what she thinks about. “You can forget about your calorie intake for one night. I see how much time you invest in living healthy, but we can let loose for a night together. Just some noodles with chicken or spring rolls and us trying to use chopsticks and giving up after two minutes and resorting to forks. How does that sound?”
The teenager would love to sigh, but it would only alarm her father further. “Yeah, you are right. Let us let loose. But only if I can choose the movie we watch after dinner!” (Y/N) feels bad for eating unhealthy food again. Her last binge was only yesterday and usually she tries to consume lighter things. But she has to bite into the sour apple, else her father will be more suspicious. After all, she can just stop. (Y/N) promises herself to not think about her weight, her shape or the calories she will eat.
Well yeah, no. Just after the first noodle hits her tongue, intrusive thoughts take a seat in her mind, getting settled.
‘You already look like a potato.’
‘Are you sure this is the right thing to eat?’
‘Can you really stop?’
‘Dad is going to hate you when he finds out.’
All of them and more enter her head. (Y/N) is unable to shake them off. She is fine. She doesn’t have a problem. She just doesn’t feel like eating now, that’s fine, right?
“Uhm Dad. I’m full and really tired from the day. Is it ok if I go to bed? Maybe we can rain check on that movie?” The girl asks, feeling even worse for ditching her father. Usually it’s the other way around.
“Are you feeling ok? You look a little pale. Are you sick?” Spencer fires his question canone being the borderline helicopter father he always is. “Yes, just really exhausted from all the assignment and school work. A good night's rest and I will be good as new.” (Y/N) attempts a small smile, but fails miserably at it.
“Ok, sleep tight baby. I’ll put the leftovers in the fridge for you tomorrow.” Quickly she goes into her room. The thoughts in her head scream louder and louder with each step she takes. Can she really stop? Maybe she should come clean to her father.
‘And risking him hating you? Look at you, thinking you are sane is the only thing keeping him from abandoning you. How would you explain him keeping you otherwise? It’s definitely not for your looks.’
Later that night, (Y/N) hasn’t gotten a wink of sleep because of the voices, she makes her way back to the kitchen. In an attempt to distract herself, the teenager scrolled through her social media sites. There she was met by pictures of perfect people.
Perfect bodies. Perfect lives. Perfect smiles. Perfect family. Perfect friends. Everything about them is perfect.
And then there is her. Her body is unperfect. Her life is a mess. Her smile is not that of a model. Her family is just her, her father and the people he works with. Her friends aren’t always the best associates.
The stress of not feeling enough is getting to (Y/N)’s head. Like several times before that her body goes into auto. She doesn’t control her movements, though she tells herself all of this is willently.
Like so many times before the girl goes through the fridge and eats everything up she can get her fingers on. But this time one thing is different. Her father is at home. And he isn’t a heavy sleeper.
The movement in the kitchen wakes him up. Immediately his brain jumps to a burglar or even worse, an UnSub they once arrested coming after him. Quickly he gets his revolver and sneaks through the hallway to the source of the noises. As Spencer only sees his daughter sitting there, he instantly relaxes.
“Hey Sweetheart, what are you doing up? It’s a school night”, he softly asks in order to not scare her. Still, (Y/N) gets startled at the sudden voice.
“Uhm, nothing much. Just hungry. Probably because I didn’t eat dinner”, she explains, looking at her father like he caught her with her hand stuck in the cookie jar. Spencer watches her closely. “This is it? Because from what it looks like you not only ate your dinner but also tomorrow’s breakfast and right now lunch.”
(Y/N) swallows her bite, feeling that sinking reality in her stomach. The pills. She needs the pills fast before her body begins to digest the food. “Uhm, yeah. I probably should go to bed. I need my sleep. Just let me tidy up. Good night, Dad.” But he is quick to stop her.
“(Y/N), I want you to sit down. There is something we have to talk about.” Hesitantly (Y/N) takes a seat. “What is it Dad? Are you reprimanding me for eating? I thought you wanted me to let loose for a night.”
Spencer sits, leaning against the kitchen counter. “Baby, I want you to be alright. But I think you are not.” His eyes get a sad look. “I’m alright. I am fine, Dad. What do you think is wrong with me?”
“Look, (Y/N), I don’t need to be a profiler to see that you are struggling with something. Do you want to tell me about it?” Her answer is a tight lipped smile and a “I’m fine. There is nothing to talk about.”
The father sighs. She is not leaving him much of a choice. “And what about them?” Spencer asks after getting something from the highest shelf in the kitchen, the one (Y/N) barely reaches by stepping on a stool. He sets a little container down on the table.
“Dad I-” “No (Y/N). You don’t need to explain anything. It’s my turn to talk. I found those in your room yesterday while I was looking for a book. At first I thought nothing of it, I mean you are trying to live healthy, so I thought this is part of the process. But then I saw that they have to be prescribed and I know that these aren’t yours.
“I wanted to talk about it with you anyway. But now I know that I caught you binge eating and I see all the signs. I see them and I’m sorry for not acting sooner. (Y/N), you need help and I’m here for you. I know the last few months were especially hard on you. I can’t change what was and what happened, but I will be here for you now." Tears stream down on boths their faces.
(Y/N) is stammering for words. “I-I am fine. I can stop anytime I want. Th-this was a conscious d-decision.” Her father envelops her in a hug, cradling her head to his chest. She begins to sob.
“I know, Sweetheart. It’s hard and it won’t get easier from here on, but I’m here. You know you can’t stop, it’s only an illusion your eating disorder wants you to believe. But we get through it together. You, I and the team if you want to. We take it at your pace.” By now the two are crying loudly.
“I want it to stop, Dad. Please make the voice go away.”
He can’t make it go away. No one can. But Spencer helps to quiet it. Together they tackle the disorder, through the good and the bad times. He takes off from work for a time and (Y/N) out of school for a few weeks to be able to work on it together, to make the voice quieter and her life better.
Taglist:
All works:
@dindjarinsspouse
Criminal Minds:
@averyhotchner @mggsprettygirl @herecomesthewriterwitch @ash19871962
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x daughter!reader#spencer reid#spencer reid x teen!reader#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfiction#fanfiction#x reader#reader insert#x daughter!reader#x teen!reader#tw: eating disorder
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hi can i request a Barba x reader where the reader is a detective and they like each other, and there is a hard case that raf is getting a lot of pressure from the squad, and he is so stressed out (he does not sleep or eat) and he and the reader are in his office discussing the case and passes out in front of her from stress / exhaustion🥺
Exhaustion
A/N: Hey Anon! I’ve, uh, I’ve definitely been Rafi in this story...up for 40+ hours without eating (hurray full time job + full time student!) and it’s not fun. Make sure y’all eat, drink water, and sleep.
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Words: 1462
Taglist: @the-baby-bookworm @beccabarba @thatesqcrush @itsjustmyfantasyroom @stardust-fray @permanentlydizzy @infiniteoddball @ben-c-group-therapy @glowingmess @whimsicallymad @averyhotchner @mrsrafaelbarba @detective-giggles @dianilaws
You groaned inwardly as you arrived at One Hogan Place, a pile of case files under your arm, already hearing Rafael’s exhausted voice in your ears, even if he tried to hide it behind snark and quips. But the truth was, this case was taking its toll…on all of you. Even Liv was getting pissed; you had overheard her and Rafael get into one of their very rare screaming matches last time he was at the precinct. They never yelled at each other like that, but this case was just that bad.
Knocking on his office door, you let yourself in. Rafael didn’t even glance up from his desk, asking a terse, “what?”
You walked silently to his desk, depositing the case files onto the top of it. He glanced up then, his green eyes narrowing in annoyance, but his exhaustion was deep in there, too, the bags under his eyes deeper than you’d ever seen before. His recycle bin by his door was overflowing with takeout coffee cups, and three more were on his desk.
“Here’s the statements from the latest victims, along with the DNA evidence and all the other forensics found at each crime scene,” you listed off, stifling a yawn. You were currently working a double, and it was mercifully nearing the end of the day for you…at 11pm. A small part of you felt bad for Rafael having to be holed up in his office this late, too, but that was his choice; he didn’t have a Lieutenant ordering him to stay on. He could go home, go to sleep for a few hours before tomorrow.
“Hmph,” he grunted, going back to what he was working on.
You waited for a moment, long enough that he looked up at you again, quirking an eyebrow as if to ask why you were still there. “Why don’t you get some sleep, Rafael? The trial’s still a couple days away, and slaving away into the night isn’t going to help anyone. Go sleep, have a fresh set of eyes in the morning.” While all that was true, you were also just…worried about him. It felt like he was always at the courthouse, or in his office, and you wanted to make sure he was sleeping. Hell, you normally got lunch with him in the middle of trials, but during this case, he had become a recluse, rushing from office to courthouse then back again. He barely spoke to you—any of you—unless it was absolutely necessary, and you were just…worried.
Rafael glared at you, slowly putting his pen down. “I don’t need you to tell me what to do, Detective. I’m perfectly fine, and I have a job to do,” he scowled. But you could hear his tired voice, his words slurring slightly from his exhaustion.
“Wouldn’t you do it better with a clear mind?” He opened his mouth to argue, but you pressed on, “come on, Barba, even we sleep, even if it’s for an hour or two. When was the last time you slept? How long?”
“Worry about yourself,” Rafael growled, waving you off. He went to get back to work, but with his dull reactions, you snatched his pen from his fingers, and then his legal pad off his desk. The glare you got in return would kill a lesser person. “Detective, I’m not playing. Give. It. Back.”
“I’m not playing, either, counselor. You’re done for tonight.” Your eyes softened. “Don’t make me arrest you.” Rafael’s face was turning beat red from anger. “I can and will take you in, force you to sleep in the Sleeping Quarters. I’ll cuff you to the bed.” Your cheeks warmed, hearing yourself saying such suggestive words to Rafael—you liked the man, and the thought of him handcuffed to your bed had passed through your mind before.
Rafael slammed his hands down on his desk, standing quickly, and making his way around his desk towards you. But as you watched, his eyes unfocused, his feet stuttered a step, and he started going down. Gasping, you dropped his pen and pad, reaching to catch his limp body. In your haste, you slammed your hip against the corner of his desk, letting out a hiss of pain as you caught him, gently lowering him to the ground.
“Shit, fuck, Raf are you okay?” you asked, the pain in your side exploding through you. He grumbled, but was still pretty out of it. Rubbing away the pain in your hip, you braced yourself, silently thankful that you hit the gym so often as you scooped Rafael into your arms, struggling to carry him over to his couch. He was starting to stir, and you went to get him a glass of water from his cooler in the corner of his office.
“Wh-what happened?” Rafael croaked out, sounding disorientated. You came back, helping him gently into a sitting position, giving him the water to drink.
“You tell me; you stood up, then dropped like a sack of potatoes,” you explained, taking the empty glass and refilling it.
Rafael sighed, suddenly looking much older, much more exhausted than he had earlier. “Okay, so, maybe I haven’t slept in a while….”
“When was the last time you’ve eaten? Or drank something without caffeine in it?” you asked.
“What day is it?”
You gave him a pointed look, before answering in a timid voice, “Thursday.”
Rafael closed his eyes for a moment, thinking. “Last I slept was…Monday, I think. Eaten was maybe Tuesday evening? Drank something without caffeine…uh, well….”
“Rafael Barba, I am taking you home right now. You are going to eat something, and then you are going to drink water, and then you are going to sleep,” you instructed, in disbelief. How was he still functioning?
“I can’t sleep,” he admonished. “This case is too important! Those—what he did to those women…those children…” he trailed off, looking like he may cry. Tears appeared in your eyes as you thought about the details of the case before you blinked them away.
“Raf…you’re not helping anyone by passing out in your office. It’s…it’s not admitting defeat to admit that you’re human,” you said softly. He closed his eyes at your words. “Come on, these case files will be here tomorrow; you need to take of yourself so that you can take care of the victims.”
Rafael nodded softly. “Fine, alright. I’ll go home for the night…but,” he sighed, “but I’m a little afraid to stand right now.”
“Want me to get you something from the vending machine down the hall?” you asked, giving him a small smile.
“Please—just something small; I’ll eat a real meal at home,” he returned your smile. You nodded, refilling his water once before and handing it to him before heading to the vending machine. Small bag of chips in your hand, you made your way back to Rafael’s office.
“Here’s some chips for you—” you stopped talking as you noticed his eyes were closed, his head leaning back on the couch, his mouth slightly parted, soft snores coming out. You smiled at Rafael, debating if you should wake him to move him, or simply let him sleep on the couch for the night. But it wouldn’t be comfortable, and being hungry, dehydrated, and sore wouldn’t be great tomorrow morning, so you gently shook him awake. He grumbled groggily, and you forced the chips into his hands. Once he ate them, you pulled him to his feet, wrapping an arm around his waist and leading him out of his office.
“I can walk on my own,” Rafael mumbled, still half-asleep.
“And I bet you’re also okay to drive,” you replied, hitting the elevator button.
He scoffed. “No one drives in New York; there’s too much traffic.”
You chuckled, leading him from One Hogan Place to your car, shoving him into the passenger seat. You drove him to his apartment in silence, mostly because he was nodding off in his seat before jolting awake.
“Do I need to stay the night? Make sure you sleep the full night?” you asked, half-joking. You’d do it if he asked; you just wanted to make sure he was okay.
“I’m fine, Detective,” Rafael rolled his eyes dramatically. Then in a soft voice, he said, “thank you, for taking care of me. I’ll see you tomorrow at work.”
“See you tomorrow, Raf…and please eat something, okay?”
He chuckled. “I will. Promise.”
You watched him until he made it into his building, making a mental note to yourself to stuff your purse with snacks, to make sure he ate something over the next coming days. Like you said before, the trial was still a few days out, and it promised to be a bad one.
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One Night Out
Request: May I request Tim Drake's s/o dressing up as Red Robin to patrol after he passed out? (Up to you. I don't mind headcanons). - by anon
Pairing: Tim Drake X Reader
Word Count: 726
A/N: It is just a cute short one that I actually like. I hope y’all like it
It was a normal Tuesday night in your apartment that you share with your boyfriend, Tim. You sadly haven’t seen much of him today. Tim was been trying to hack into something big, you didn’t know what it was because you were so big into the computer thing. You let him do his thing, even though you know he will get sucked into work. You tried to pull him away from the computer because you knew that he had patrol tonight, but that didn’t work. He just continued to work. You made him food and he barely touched it. It was no point at the end of the day. You love Tim and everything but you know when it is time to give up and just wait to take care of him afterward. You went into the living room and catch up on shows you were behind on. After a few hours, Tim came out of the room and walked towards you.
“Hey babe, I am about to go on patrol tonight,” He said while yawning and looking extremely tired.
“Are you sure you are okay to go on patrol? You look very exhausted” You say looking at his bags under his eyes.
“Yeah, I am sure. I am just going to sit here a little with you before I go on patrol” he says while cuddling up next to you. It was nice to have Tim cuddling next to you. You enjoyed the moment until you looked over and see that he is fast asleep. Then his phone went off and you look at the caller ID, it was Barabra.
“Hey Barabra, or is it Oracle right now since you are on the clock,” you said into the phone.
“Hey Y/N, it’s Oracle right now. Can you get Tim? It is time for him to go on patrol and there are a lot of petty crimes happening right now” Barabra says over the phone. You look at Tim and try to wake him up, but he is knocked out cold.
“Yeah, he is a little sleepy right now,” you say.
“Can you please wake him up because right now he is the only batboy in town right now. Everyone else is out of town on another mission” Barabra says worried.
“Don’t worry Red Robin will be out tonight” you say and hang up the phone. You go to the closet where Tim has his suit. One of the many benefits of having a boyfriend that is around your size is that you can fit pretty much all of his clothes. You put on the suit and look in the mirror thinking about how good you look. You grab all the gadgets you need to fight crime tonight. The good thing is that you know what you are doing because when you met Tim, you were a hero yourself. You had to stop because you hurt your leg pretty bad which took you out of the game for a few years. You have been through a lot of physical therapy to get back into shape, well to at least help out for tonight.
You leave Tim a note saying that you are out on patrol and will be back soon. You get in contact with Oracle and take care of all of the petty crime. You were lucky that there was nothing big going on because your leg started to hurt near the end of the night. It was around 6 am when you guys called it. Oracle said that you did a great job and maybe you should think about joining the hero gig again. You go back to your apartment and hear that Tim is up. He is in the bedroom calling people to make sure that you are okay. He hears you come in.
“Thank goodness that you got home. I was worried sick about you. You could have got hurt and you didn’t even know if your leg would have given out on you” he says coming out of the bedroom.
“But I am alright. My leg is only bothering me a little” you say while Tim is coming out. He sees you in his suit and his mouth drops.
“Alright, seeing you in my suit makes things a whole lot better,” he says coming towards you hugging and kissing you.
DC Taglist: @idkmanicantenglish
#robin#robin x reader#robin imagine#Red Robin#red robin x reader#red robin imagine#Tim Drake#tim drake x reader#tim drake imagine#DC comics#dc
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❝ 𝖒𝖔𝖓𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗 !¡ 𝐹𝒾𝒻𝓉𝑒𝑒𝓃 ❞
CHAPTERS “ 01 - 02 - 03 - 04 - 05 - 06 - 07 - 08 - 09 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 “
The northern jail was the most dangerous in the country, social scum, thousands of criminals were locked behind their bars. Who would tell poor Blair that he would end up there because of his father’s mistake. The problem was not the lack of hot water, but that inhuman obsession that many of the prisoners had for “new toys.” Rookies had two options; be submissive and abide by veterans’ orders or suffer the dangerous anger of those disturbed minds. It all started one night when Blair had the bad idea of going to shower alone.
𝒫𝒶𝒾𝓇𝒾𝓃𝑔: Jungkookoffender au x (female: Blair) 𝒢𝑒𝓃𝓇𝑒: smut.(later), offender au, fluff, angst. 𝒲𝑜𝓇𝒹𝓈: 4 k 𝑅𝒶𝓃𝓆𝓊𝒾𝓃𝑔: +18 𝒲𝒶𝓇𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔: dirty language, lies, serious revelations, Jk tattoos, close, much closer, childhood problems, very big problems, new threats, closer, future friends, sad conversations, memories, childhood trauma, almost kiss, this chapter It is very intense, sorry, I saw it necessary.
The breath escaped from my mouth wildly. Exhausted. With the tired muscles of colliding with such intensity the glove against the bag. I stopped to wipe the sweat off my forehead with my forearm. And I continued with my impromptu training session.
"I'll think twice about messing with you, gongjunim." His teasing voice made him cough out an exhausted laugh. I stopped and smiled at her face. Then I nod toward the ring taking me by surprise. Up.
"Am I not going to continue with the coat?" I asked, intrigued, watching from my place as I climbed into the ring without flinching. The platform was high so I had to do more than lift my leg. Go under the red ropes. I followed him into the center of the ring, waving his arms to awaken the muscles.
"You know the basics." Now it's your turn to strengthen your body.-Thirteen said simply. He knew whereof he spoke. He gave off so much self-confidence that he automatically trusted him. However, when he dragged one leg back and waved his hands at me, he tilted his head to the curious side. "Attack me."
"Thirteen..."
"Attack me," he repeated gracefully. He waved his hand more.
"They don't have protections," I growled sadly.
His laugh caught me off guard. It was so strange to hear that vital sound come out of it that I was paralyzed for a few seconds until I got used to it.
"Very presumptuous of you to think that you're going to hurt me with those tiny little hands," he added. He raised his eyebrows mockingly while smiling sideways. I opened my mouth indignantly and then, I narrowed my eyes. I released the air through my mouth. I refilled my lungs. And I raised my fists as he had taught me. I took a step doubtfully stopping at the next. For a moment, my head went blank. Everything he had learned vanished at once. I swallowed and again, I felt like that weak child who had let her beat me again. Humiliated and trampled. "Blair."
Her deep voice drew me to reality like a vol of cold water. I brought my lost eyes on the ground to yours. Her worried gaze warmed my heart. Because even if I didn't say it. Although she didn't utter a single word more, I knew in that instant that they were not necessary. He supported me. He called me to let me know he was there. That she was not alone. That they wouldn't hurt me anymore. And surprisingly that was all I needed to regain my lucidity.
Advance towards him as agile as my legs allows me. Throw a punch in the direction of your jaw. And for a second, I came to think that I would hit my target. But then, the big hand of Thirteen covered my fist with his hand as if it were nothing and I folded my arm, brought it to my back, and fell to my knees.
With my eyes blinking between amazed and confused, I watched sideways as he walked away.
"Get up," he said seriously. I raised my head and frowned. He raised an eyebrow and fixed a disappointed look on my kneeling body. He reduced me like I was nobody. I clenched my fists inside the gloves. Lay them on the ground and help me up. Thirteen proudly lifted his chin, breaking my patience. Then, I stomped to the ground and lunged toward his body without being expected. Throw a quick series of punches at your face. With his hand, he pushed mine away. Until in a direct blow to his chest, he caught both wrists at the same time leaving me defenseless. I tried to break free but that made him growl. He pushed me into his body, burying my hands in the hollow of his chest. His breath moved the hair on my crown sending a signal to my neck to stretch it up. Thirteen did just the opposite. He tilted his head down creating a clash of our foreheads. The cold temperature of his forehead contrasted with the hot sweat of mine causing me a series of exciting chills. Without controlling it, I sent a blast of hot air from my lips to his lips inches away. Notice, in that instant, how his hands closed more tightly around my wrists. I gasped when her lips brushed against mine. I opened my lips and tilted up my face when the need to have them invaded me.
But then, she pulled my wrists down. I fold my arms back leaving me on my knees again.
"Don't be distracted," she threw out with determination. She scolded me with her narrowed gaze. My cheeks were stained with humiliation. I mean, I myself had given her wide access to kiss me. Thirteen had me in her hands. He knew it. He knew he could have done what he wanted with me. And even so. It did not. And I must say that I am between surprised and a little disappointed.
Since when is it so ... Right?
With the hand still wrapped around my wrist. I gave him an annoyed look. She was on her knees in front of him. Anyone who saw our training from afar might think otherwise. And yet, it doesn't matter to him, because when I shook my arm he didn't let go. I miscalculated my next shake and I ended up falling forward. My face landed on his thigh.
"You just have to ask." And it will be all yours, baby. I heard that he gave a hoarse laugh that made my hair stand on end. I swallowed hard and irritated the walls of my throat. I let out an incredulous howl, he looks at him with a pout and a scowl. I saw her dark glowing pupils. Her wicked smile. But what really got me out of my mind was feeling his hand caress my head like a puppy while pressing my face against his thigh. I shook myself indignantly. Thirteen laughed and released my wrist. I got up quickly. A stitch in the area of my knees almost pulled me back. Too long in the same position.
I turned my back on him so I wouldn't keep staring at his twisted gaze. Enough and I put the velcro on the glove to tighten it more. I heard him mock me from behind with his hypocritical laugh. I narrowed my eye in anger and stared at him. Thirteen crossed his great arms and bowed his head mockingly.
I growled and then turned around so fast he couldn't see the blow to his stomach coming. He took my right arm but not my left. So the blow to his jaw didn't intercept him. I stepped back smiling. Bloat my lungs feeling like the winner of this assault. I must admit that I felt satisfaction when I saw his face paralyzed from the side. But the smile can't take much. When Thirteen regained sanity and modified me with that dark-eyed gaze my body set off all the alarms. He is upset. More than that, as he took slow steps toward it. The same ones that I backed away.
I try to get off the ring, I turn around and try to get past the ropes but his hand tugs on my arm throwing me back. I screamed scared by her strength. So I didn't measure mine either when I hit his stomach. Thirteen opened her eyes at the folded body. He brought his hands to his stomach and looked at me in surprise. I stayed in my position with the nerves still very present. Waiting for your next move. I screamed, bending down to dodge his hook. I had been caught off guard. To my surprise, when I looked back at him I saw the start of a smile.
"Come on. Again." he provoked in a playful voice. She raised her fists and cracked her neck. She moved her jaw and narrowed her eyes. I nodded and knocked. My glove got caught in his hand but this time he reacted much more lively. I formed a pleasing smile and continued to hit. I hit him he would stop them. So we continue all afternoon.
[...]
I knew who it was.
I knew it and still accepted.
I didn't know the reason, I was just guided by the alarmed voice in my head. He walked the hallways of the visiting wing with caution. My stomach bubbled nervous because it tasted like it was coming. Nor did I do much to control the trembling in my hands when I finally went out into the meeting room.
Of course, as every Tuesday the tables were full of families or friends who came to visit the prisoners. But I was only concerned with one. I was only suffocated by the person who sat in her seat away from everyone as if she were the owner of the place.
"How long," said my father with a cynical smile on his lips. His three-day beard showed through the profile of his face giving him a much more faded image. So worry about me. Not for him, of course. But for my mother. When he grew a long beard it only meant that he had been drinking and fucking her whores for so long that he hadn't even bothered about his personal appearance. So, for what is the same, to be presentable to see his daughter. He was wearing one of his most expensive suits and from what I could smell when I got close he was wearing the cologne from the blue bottle. My father had just come from one of his dates. I sat rigid on the seat out of pure protocol. They did not allow prisoners to stand. They wanted us controlled while they were watching us on camera. My father continued to maintain his superior gaze as I sweep my left-out outfit. "I'm not going to ask how are you because your mother has already taken care of that job."
"I'm not going to ask you how are you because, really, I don't give a shit," I replied with dark humor.
I mimicked his fucking smile when I saw he grow when I noticed my contempt for him.
"I'm going to have to talk seriously to the director of this prison." It is not possible that you have become so vulgar and so disrespectful towards your family.
"You were never my family." Mom was. You were just the motherfucker hitting him.
"Also the one who bought you a car every month."
"I don't have to put up with this."
I got up from the table dragging the chair. From afar, I watched as the guard at the door signaled me with a threatening gaze to sit down again. If so, I did it again. Catch my tongue between your teeth to avoid screaming. I didn't want to show how fucked up I was. Much less in front of him because he knew that it would give him satisfaction.
"You better get used to it." The threatening tone I use gave me goosebumps. Because I had only heard that depth twice, now, and when he kindly explained that I would rot in jail. So my heart quickened. "I have been so concerned about my daughter's misbehavior that I have casually forgotten to deposit the money in my friend's account."
The feeling I had before entering came alive. I lost myself in my own thoughts for a second, stopping listening to him. All I was aware of was the way my fist clenched the fabric of my pants.
"I already told you, darling. If you go from bad to worse, it will be. ”She concluded with a simple shrug. He adjusted the tie around his neck and then stood up as if nothing had happened. I looked at him with no expression on my face. "Don't take it personally. I just think you need a lesson. And this place has the tools you need to improve and be a better daughter in the future. You will thank me ..."
"649, stay away right now! Guards!"
My body moved on its own. It was as if a strange force was screaming at me what to do. Anger flooded my head completely clouding. I sneak onto the table to get to him. My father was so scared that he almost fell on his ass to the ground. When I saw that the table was too long. I ran around him. Just as my hands brushed against the stupid shirt collar my body was jerked back.
“You're a manipulative bastard!” I yelled hysterically as I moved my body desperately to break free. The guard squeezed me tighter. I knew later that I would have bruises on my hips and arms but that didn't stop me from continuing to fight. "You're not going to get away with it, "I swear to you for the life of you that you are going to pay for everything you have done to us!"
"649 or you calm down or I put you in isolation! "You yelling at your ear does not usually cause people to calm down. For me, it was the trigger. I was aware of what was around me. Scared people fucking other people who looked at me like I was crazy. Everyone was judging me. Everyone. No one was spared. My chest clenched so hard that I was about to pass out. "649!"
I didn't hear the guard screaming because I ran away. And luckily for me, no one seemed to really care about my condition when I walked through the door that connected to the prison wing. The air was beginning to lack. The walls began to close more and more. And yet it kept running aimlessly.I didn't care either. I just wanted to get lost somewhere where things were better.
When rounding a corner, crash into a chest. With teary eyes, I raised my head. When I recognized her dark eyes I felt safe again. I saw how he checked down the hall that nobody saw us. Then, she caught my cheeks with her hands and looked at me with a sad look. Without thinking, I put my arms around her waist and buried my face in her chest.
I sniffed my own tears dizzy when he dragged me with him. I didn't know where it took me until I smelled the humidity in the bathroom. Listen to a cubicle latch. And I buried myself more.
"I can not anymore...
“Why can't you go on?” His soft voice gave me the peace I needed. I felt the palm of his hand massage my scalp. And her other hand, squeeze my hip, not suggestively, in the way you want to tell a person that you are there for them. Thirteen took my silence calmly. "Everything will be fine."
"I'm never going to get out of here while he's still out. Never...
His hand in my hair froze.
"You are innocent, Blair." You are not going to stay here. —He said in such a persuasive tone that I didn't know what it meant. The hand on my hip stopped squeezing me against him. I felt his touch colder, more calculated. He was not him. Something was disturbing him. Something was occupying his head.
"What about you?" I sobbed in an understandable hoarse tone. I took off his chest to look at him pleadingly. But what I wasn't expecting was for him to reject eye contact by turning his head to the side.
"I what?" I ask in a whisper to myself. He frowned thoughtfully, lost in his own problems.
"Are you also innocent?"
I don't know why I asked that. Simply, the words came out of my mouth alone, coming to life. His hand on my hip tightened. His entire body stiffened. But it was my clenched jaw that gave me a bad answer.
"I don't like talking about it," he confessed. Although she already knew, hearing it from her own lips was completely different. And even though she still had a wall around the world. I was not disappointed because it was the first time we had talked about it openly and she did not ignore me as always.
“Will you talk to me about it someday?” I asked with an innocence that made him form a small smile. I looked up with pleading eyes at hers. My heart leaped into my chest when I did not meet a shy look, but one with human warmth.
"Someday." The topic ended at once. I nodded more than satisfied with the result and then, I smiled when his hands squeezed my cheeks gently. "Now, tell me, who do I have to hit?"
[...]
I told him everything.
And when I say everything is everything.
I told him about my childhood. My adolescence and of course, the trigger so disastrous that it had the beginning of my adulthood. Thirteen listened patiently. I don't judge myself, I just listen. With a calm look, she was going to tell me without speaking that she was there. That she wouldn't leave until she finished venting. And surprisingly, it was easier than it had ever been.
And I felt better.
Better.
Every time I talked about my father's abuse my throat would get dry from crying. Knowing that he was next to me holding my hand made everything so much easier. He understood me. And I felt that it did. It was not the typical understanding that your friends tell you. This was different. The related to me. The analysis of what I had because somehow he had also suffered it.
The emotion to which I was reminded of his "someday". I just hoped it wasn't too far away.
Enter my cell with my head lost in my world until the image in front of me is presented.
"Lucy, what are you doing!" I screamed hysterically. I ran to her, slapping her hand to drop a white pill of unknown origin on the ground.
"Let me!" she shout back with the same hysteria as I do. I was very nervous. Her forehead was sweaty and the vein in her neck was swollen from the pressure inside her head.
-You are crazy? "I denied it." Bending down to pick up the pill from the floor. I held it between my fingers. I narrowed my eyes to analyze it better and then, I opened them unheard of.
"Misoprostol?"
I looked disapprovingly at Lucy but she rejected the contact looking away. I gasped with a loud yell. This medication is used for high-risk pregnancies. Rachel, one of my old friends before entering here, had suffered one of those demon pills because she thought she had been pregnant. We ended up in the hospital for an urgent stomach wash. It is a test drug that is not yet available from science. So it is very dangerous. This worries me a lot because it is also expensive. Where the hell did he get it from?
I don't want to have it, Blair. I do not want it! -I deny. She shook her head from side to side desperately seeking my attention. He had it when he took my hands and I almost sobbed into my face.
"That boy is not to blame, Lucy," I whispered with my eyes closed. It was his body could do whatever he wanted, correct. But he was toying with his life for something that might have a solution if he just got involved in looking for it.
"Understand, if I have it." If I decide to raise that child, he will suffer because I will never love him.
"Is it so bad?" I asked irritated. I frowned intensely. My attitude created a kind of guilt in her because she released my hands and turned her back. After a few seconds, her shoulders trembled and her voice cut to sobs. I felt bad. Too bad. She just wanted to understand and I had yelled at her. I had overturned my shitty day with her and she didn't deserve it. I approached from behind, with my soul hanging by a thread and with a tight stomach. I touched her shoulder to support her, but Lucy jerked away. They lost me in their own thoughts. He blinked up at me and only when he knew it was me did he relax, but he never stopped crying. Just as you did that night when ... "Lucy, what really happened?" "I tried to get her to look at me but she avoided my gaze with fear." Watch carefully as you use one hand between your legs and squeeze the fabric of her pants fearfully. It seemed gone again. I slowly denied it until I understood it... "Who did it?"
Lucy was afraid of me. Disgusted, I did not do to myself, I did herself. My heart sank as much as the blood automatically stopped pumping. My face went pale as she lunged into my arms and squeezed me as if her life depended on it. I stopped, and a lonely tear ran down my cheek. My lip trembled but I held it in my teeth. I brought my hand to her head and stroked her as my mother did to me.
"It was ... Wa-a-s ...
"Take it easy, take your time." - Breathe into her enlarged hair the caresses. Run a hand down the line of her spine and her body relaxed. She pulled away and detected me with a bloodshot gaze. It was rage and fear that wandered tirelessly through her sad eyes. I nodded sure to say with my gesture that I would not judge her. That I wouldn't tell anyone. That I was not alone ...
And then she did it.
"It was Carvallo ...
"Son of a bitch ..." A third voice startled us. Frightened, I turned abruptly toward the door to find the worst possible scene.
Jimin with his eyes open with a cake inside the cell.
"Graff! No, Jimin! ”Lucy yelled desperately but it was too late because he had already run away. Since I was in shock I didn't even move. It was Lucy who reacted first by running but in the middle of her way, just as she was going to cross the door she groaned in pain and her body doubled towards the bunks.
"Let me take you to the infirmary," I said awkwardly, with no color on my face. I reached out to help him straighten up but then, Lucy put her hands on the mattress and stood up straight.
"Blair! I ... "he began to say with difficulty. His hand was crushed on her belly so I sent a worried look. He asks her again but she answered something else. "Blair, please. Talk to his. I don't want him to ruin his life because of me. Please...
I quickly nodded.
And then, I ran out of my cell like crazy. Stumbling over people and earning a couple of insults. I knew I was looking for a needle in a haystack. She didn't know where Jimin had gone. Standing in the middle of the hallway looking in all possible directions. I put my hands to my head and cursed desperately. But for better or for worse. I ended up finding out when I heard screaming in the yard.
I stared at the patio door with fear. And I ran. I walked towards her as quickly as my legs allowed. I swung open the door. I didn't care if the glass broke. Let them scold me if they wanted to. She had more important things to think about.
And that included the ring of prisoners cheering up a fight. I made my way between them between the small gaps between the bodies. When you reach the beginning of the clearing, bring your hand to your mouth at the scene in front of your eyes.
Jimin had Cavallo under him. He punched him. Scratches. The man had a face so full of blood that you could no longer distinguish where his mouth ended or where his eyes began. I denied it desperately. I desperately sought help from the prisoners but they all ignored me because they were busy cheering.
Hope came to me when among so many men I visualized black hair next to mint. Thirteen abruptly pushed a prisoner aside to see the scene up close. He opened his eyes like crazy and slapped Suga on the shoulder who nodded. Behind, Taehyung appeared running. He gaped at the scene, putting his hands to his head.
Thirteen approached Jimin and yanked him out of Carvallo's weak body.
"What the hell is wrong with you? Graff! ”Shouted Thirteen, upset. He shook him by the shoulders to make him react but he only saw how Suga and Taehyung lifted their victim from the ground.
-Was the. Thirteen. It was him! ”Jimin squealed with tears. He pointed at Carvallo with his arm. Thirteen tensed. It tense full body. He looked at his friend with doubt. With doubt so dark that my body bristled with fear. I swallow hard and turned to see me. When his screwed up gaze met mine I couldn't keep mine so I immediately lowered it. I sobbed and started crying.
Hurried footsteps sounded behind everyone. The prisoners moved away leaving her in the crosshairs. Thirteen stopped controlling Jimin because her attention was on Lucy. Thirteen stared at her wetly. He took a step in her direction but Lucy backed away. Thirteen contracted a hurt expression, more than that.
Carvallo curved her body to vomit and then, Thirteen turned her body slowly towards him. There was no longer white in his gaze. The black had filled the entire surface in a look as terrifying as the devil himself.
#jeon jungkook#BTS jungkook#jeon jungguk#jungkook#Jung HoSeok#jeon jeongkook#jeon jeongguk#jeongguk#kookie#bts#btvs#BTSP#bts fic#bts jhope#bts army#bts jin#jungkook smut#kpop smut#bts smut#bts smau#Smut#icons jungkook#fanfic#bts au fanfic#bts fanfic
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general discussion underneath, again, sorry for yet more ooc. it’s not a negative rant for once, though!! it’s only under a cut bc not everyone will wanna see it ahaha
first, i want to apologize for both so much ooc lately and my failure to answer replies on a timely basis. there isn’t any excuse for it, and, like... i know i need to make more time to answer stuff. and like. any thread i have in my drafts, which is quite a few of them, are all threads that i am still greatly interested in continuing. so there’s that, and... i will do my best to make sure i reply in a timely manner in the future.
i will also work on posting less ooc bc i know some people don’t like to see it; we aren’t here for me, we’re here for the muses, ahaha. i promise i will work on it; it’s just a bad habit i’ve always had when it comes to tumblr rp.
secondly, my hours at work have been steadily increasing lately -- i have 26 hours on my newest schedule, which. yay money. but also. it’s very exhausting both mentally and physically, since i’m a cashier in retail, and lemme tell ya... being a cashier in The Current State of the World™ is somehow even more infuriating and tiring than being a cashier normally, at least for me. i’m an introvert, after all; being around people honestly just saps the hell out of my energy, and by the time i get home, i’m so wiped out that the last thing i want to do is answer things and talk to people (there are a few people that are exceptions to this, of course, but i’m just talking in general). especially if i work until, like, 8-10pm, which does happen occasionally. so, like. idk the point i’m really getting at here, except that i’m gonna have even less time to answer stuff on days that i’m not off. plus i stream at least every Tuesday night, which is indeed another time period taken up. and i moderate Sylvie’s stream every Monday night as well, so... yeah.
i do a lot outside of this!! which... yeah. my brain makes me wish i could just sit at home all day and just do this, because i really enjoy it!! like. i know it may not have shown very well recently, but i genuinely do, and god, i wish i had all the time in the world to answer everything for everyone i owe stuff to. but, unfortunately, bills also need to be paid, and unfortunately, i don’t make any money doing this, lol. it’s a hobby. and that’s fine!!
honestly i just wish i had a different, better job lmfao
plus i plan on going to university hopefully sometime within the year, since i wanna continue my education and get my degree in what i actually want to get it in, which is Japanese, and. just. that’s been a plan too, but since my real life location has changed, it’s not as easy for me to go to the school i was originally planning on going to, so that’s still up in the air. i know living in dorms is an option, but... to be frank, i’m a broke-ass bitch, and i don’t even think all my financial aid i get for being a broke-ass bitch is enough to cover dorm living, much less everything else.
but yeah.
this is basically an apology/update post. i’m sorry i haven’t been as diligent as i should be. i really want to rp with you all, everyone here is really cool!! i’m just. so sorry for my ic inactivity, and that goes to discord rp groups i’m part of, too. i’m so sorry. x.x
i’m just. wiped tf out. all the time. lol.
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i so desire an edward. this obvs happens before the other chapters.
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For as much as Edward brings too much work at home, stays at school sometimes well past seven in the evening, on Fridays, he makes it a point to leave when the day ends. He has an entire weekend he can use; he’s exhausted, and also tired of being in the same room all week long. Therefore, once the kids have left, he gathers his things, makes sure his grading bag is full with whatever needs to be graded, checks his e-mails one last time so that he can dare to believe that he’s finally caught up, and then heads out.
He walks towards his car, when he sees the art teacher – M Étienne – slip and slide along the icy sidewalk carrying at least two bags on each arm, a backpack and two precariously stacked boxes in his hands. Edward jogs up to him, mindful of the snow and ice that’s started painting the sidewalks white and grey and steadies his colleague’s box before it can careen to the floor.
Étienne is new to the school. Edward’s kids don’t have him yet, since they have music for the first part of the year, but so far, Edward’s had the chance to chat with him a few times since the start of the year. He seems nice and friendly, if a little uncertain of his own skill and shy around the edges, but he supposes he’d been the same when he’d started in this school, a few years back. His take on Étienne is that he’s still trying to figure himself out, while attempting to make a place for himself in the school and keep his head above water while doing so. It’s not an easy feat and he doesn’t envy the man at all.
Edward, at least, only ever has twenty-eight students to deal with. Max. Étienne sees one-half of the school until January, and then the other half afterwards. On top of that, he’s filling in for the well beloved art teacher who had retired the year before and so carving himself a place in the hearts of students and staff is another challenge he has.
Still, from the little Edward has seen, Étienne seems to know what he’s doing. He’s given the art room some needed TLC, has put up some new posters on the wall and the vibe of the room has changed as well. It’s cool and funky and eclectic with beaded curtains, lamps of all kinds instead of the neon lights that sap everyone’s energy and an art-library in the back corner with a few beanbag chairs. He can see why the students’ would like hanging out here. Hell, he’d like to hang there as well.
From the little he’s heard, the students’ seem to not hate him and he supposes it’s a start. Étienne certainly fits the bill of the art teacher, what with his rather long, crazy, curly hair he keeps up in a bun with a few brushes or pens sticking out, the colourful patterned shirts he seems to always wear, his paint speckled hands and his smock he’s never seen without. He looks like a caricature straight out of a children’s book and Edward wonders if maybe it’s part of his persona – if he’s not trying to be the art teacher that the children expect him to be. Still, he’s a lively fellow, maybe just a little lonely and in need of a friend.
“Easy there,” Edward says as he steadies the box. Étienne looks a little frazzled, but thankful for the assist. He looks severely under dressed for the weather, all things considered, but Edward supposes that if he’s only walking a few meters away, it could pass.
“Oh, thanks, you’re a life saver!” Étienne shifts the boxes, the bags, and his footing as he tries to steady everything he’s carrying.
“Where’re you off to with all this stuff? You bailing on us already?”
Étienne laughs and rolls his eyes, “I wish. This is the grading I have to do over the weekend. It’s caught up on me. Again. And I didn’t want to stay in late. Again.”
Edward blinks. He totally gets it, but it looks like a lot of stuff. His little messenger bag full looks like nothing in comparison. Étienne shrugs, having seen the expression on his face. “I have twelve different groups who’ve finished projects this week. You do the math.”
“Yikes. That sounds like a bad time.”
“You have no idea. I think I was a little too overenthusiastic with the giant, big, projects. Very impractical for carrying around.” As if to add emphasis, he shifts the box again and it slides a bit.
“D���you need a hand with those? They look like they’re gonna fall off... come on, give me a box, I’ll walk you to your car.” Edward makes to reach for the box and notices how Étienne’s cheeks colour ever so.
“Oh I don’t have a car. I was walking to the bus stop.”
Edward gaps at him. Clearly, this man is insane. No one in their right mind would bring this much stuff on the bus during rush hour. Just thinking about it makes him want to weep.
“D’you need a lift? Where d’you live? I’ll drive you, come on.” He says it without thinking and figures that even if Étienne is out of his way, he can drop him off to the nearest métro station, or street corner.
“It’s fine. I’ve always managed, really, thanks for offering.” Étienne tries to brush it off as if it’s nothing – as if having two boxes and five bags to carry on the bus is nothing, but Edward is tired and has no patience to deal with this.
“Car’s this way, gimme the box and tell me where you live.” He bullies one of the boxes out of Étienne’s hands and starts heading towards his car. Étienne opens his mouth to protest, but Edward throws him his True and Patented Teacher Look and Étienne falls quiet.
Edward loads up the car and Étienne thanks him at least four times and tells him he doesn’t have to, really, another seven, before they’re even on the road.
“So, are you gonna give me an address or do I have to guess where I’m driving you to?” By now, Edward’s decided he’s gonna drop Étienne at his place, if only to spite him and because honestly, his colleague looks as dead tired as he feels and he wouldn’t put it past Étienne to fall asleep on the bus and wake up in a different county with his multitude of boxes and bags.
“If you can drop me off on the corner of Parc George I’ll just have one bus to take. I don’t want to make this a detour for you...”
Edward grips his steering wheel tightly and sighs. “For the love of God, Étienne, just accept the damned ride and tell me where I’m bringing you to.” He’s tired, he’s dealt with his own rebellious students all week and he just wants to get his colleague home and then go home himself. He’s not trying to be Mother Theresa, he’s just trying to help a colleague out.
“Okay, okay, fine,” Étienne says with a frown and a pout, and finally, finally gives him an address.
“Good job, you did it!” Edward says in his overly cheerful teacher voice, “See was that so hard? You can get a reward from the reward bin if you wish,” He adds for good measure. He catches Étienne trying to stifle a laugh from the passenger side and can’t help but grin himself.
“God, but, it’s been a week.” His colleague says and he has to agree to that.
--
It turns out that Étienne only lives a little ways away from where he does. It’s not really a detour, more like a giant loop, and it’s really no inconvenience. He helps Étienne unload the car and walks the stuff to his door. “Is all this stuff going back on Monday?” He asks. He has visions of Étienne cramming on a multitude of buses to get to work (the shock had been real when he’d found out Étienne had two buses to take and a forty-five minute commute when he lived fifteen minutes away by car – give or take) and having the worst of times squeezing by other commuters.
“Most of it, yeah. Might leave some of it for Tuesday...” Étienne sighs and pulls up his hair in a loose ponytail. Edward is briefly distracted by the curls as a plan starts to form in his head.
“I’ll come pick you up.” He says as though it’s the most logical thing in the world.
Étienne looks at him as though he’s gone mad. “What? No. One lift was enough. You don’t need to go out of your way. It’s fine.”
“Oh my God, just accept the ride! You’re like ten minutes away from my place. It’s no big deal.”
“Edward; no. I appreciate the lift, but this was fine.”
“I’ll be here by 7 am sharp. You can either get in the car and move back to school; or, if you’re not here, I’ll leave and you can take the bus. I’ll see you on Monday. Have a nice weekend,” He gives Étienne a cheery wave and heads back towards his car, while Étienne sputters and tries to call him back.
“Edward! This isn’t how things work!” Étienne shouts from his front door.
“Happy grading! Get some rest!” Edward shouts back, before he gets in his car and drives away, waving to Étienne.
By the time Monday rolls around, Étienne is out by 6h58 sharp, with his multitude of bags and boxes, and a coffee for Edward.
Edward tells him he didn’t have to – that the ride was free, but Étienne smiles syrupy sweet at him and tells him to accept the damned coffee or he can throw it out the window. Edward cracks a smile at that and accepts the drink.
Within the week, it becomes customary for Edward to drive Étienne to and from school and for Étienne to bring him his morning coffee.
Quietly and surely, through the multitude of rides they share, a friendship blooms. Edward gets to know Étienne a little better, finds out that he’s a riot and has the actual best stories to tell and Étienne finds himself the friend he’d been looking for.
The rides, of course, continue and never really end.
FIN
#pc: montreal#pc: edmonton#edward murphy#étienne maisonneuve#au#ficlet#3 sentence fic meme thing#teacher au
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The Wedding-(M)
Pairing TaehyungxOC (named)
Genres: romance, fluff, smut
Premise: Taehyung’s youngest sister is getting married. What she wants is what she gets. Though, there’s an early bump in the road regarding a meddling bridal consultant.
Word count: 6972
(From the Preview)
“Don’t you think that’s a little…,”
“What’s wrong with it? Is it the price?”
“No.”
“Then what’s the problem? The consultant said it was really in these days and I love it!”
“The consultant doesn’t know what they’re talking about. Isn’t there something…I don’t know, a bit more traditional?”
“Taehyung, don’t big brother me.” She huffed.
“But I am your big brother.” He replied.
She rolled her eyes. “The consultant helped me pick it out and I like it. So unless you have a better idea, which I doubt given your questionable taste in fashion, this is the one I want.”
“Just where is this all-knowing bridal consultant?” He complained.
“All-knowing is a bit much, even for me. Nice to meet you, you must be the brother? I’m Camille.” She offered a hand, smiling.
Taehyung blinked for a moment before shaking her hand. “I am. Nice to meet you, too. But I have to say I’m not a fan.” He declared.
She raised an eyebrow.
“That dress is sheer! It’s a wedding!” Taehyung began.
“Yuna, why don’t you head back to the fitting room and put on your regular clothes? Seems he’s up for a chat?” Camille said, glancing at the bride.
“Don’t be rude. She loves that dress.” She complained as soon as the younger girl was out of ear shot.
“She said you picked it. So pick something different.” He reaffirmed.
“You’re being ridiculous.” Camille scoffed.
“I’m being reasonable! There are hundreds of dresses in here me you put her in a sheer wedding dress?” He replied, exasperated.
“It’s going to look different post alterations. In any case my job is to cater to the bride, not her wallet. So be a good credit card and spend. She picked that dress out of like fifty we tried on yesterday when you elected not to be present. I think she’s played the field. She’s a grown woman and she knows what she wants.”
“Look, I get that you have a job to do, I’m just asking you to do it—,” he began before she reappeared, dressed and ready to go.
“Tae, come on, don’t harass my bridal consultant. Thank you so much Camille, I’ll see you in a couple of months?” Yuna asked.
“Yes of course! Thank you for coming by again today. And thank you, Mr. Kim for making this all possible.” Camille replied, grinning.
“We’re not done discussing this but we should get going if we want to make lunch.” Taehyung sighed.
Camille smiled and waved. Working in a bridal shop, family opinions often ran rampant, but a little pushiness never hurt if it kept the bride’s opinion first and foremost. Despite his blatant dislike for the dress one thing came across very clear to Camille: Yuna gets what Yuna wants and Yuna? She really wanted that dress.
Taehyung seemed to do all but quietly agree in the days following. In his spare moments, her phone was ringing off the hook. Her office number, her cell number. So insistent on encouraging Yuna to reconsider.
She was over it by the third week and answered the phone on that Tuesday with the mind to lose the entire wedding just for the satisfaction of cursing him out.
“Mr. Kim, what do you need?” She answered, flatly. “I hope now isn’t a bad time.” He replied.
“Depends on what you’re calling about.” Camille said, hoping to reign her irritation in just a little. “I know I’ve been giving you a hard time about the dress but this isn’t about that. You see, Yuna is becoming very particular about this wedding. I’m hoping to make things special for her. For that, I know she’ll expect me to dress to the theme like everyone else. I’ve been trying to figure out exactly how to do that. Her planner…, your mother…advised me to contact you. She said you also help dress members of the bridal family or party?”
He seemed genuinely unsure. Something she wasn’t quite familiar with hearing from him after weeks of him attempting to wear her down. In that instant, irritation melted away in exchange for the familiar excitement fashion brought to her.
“Yes, of course. When would you like to meet?”
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“It’s rare for you to be around during the week.” Mrs. Rose commented. “Yeah, I know. I came to see your book for the Yuna Kim wedding.” Camille explained.
“Oh? Sure. It’s in my study.” Her mother replied. She was reclining in the backyard near the pool. “Mom, why did you send him to me?” Cami asked.
“Because I know you can help. Is there anything else you need? I’m relaxing.” The elder woman replied.
“No, of course not. I’ll take a peek and then be on my way. I’ll be back Saturday night. Please tell Dad I said hello.” She said. “Mmhmm.” Mrs. Rose hummed. Camille rolled her eyes and headed inside.
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Taking a few pictures for reference, Camille headed home for the night. She was greeted at the door of her two bedroom apartment by Cairo, her beloved Russian blue tabby.
“Did you miss me, snookums? I’m a little later today. Let’s get you fed again, hmm?” She said, scooping him up and carrying him into the kitchen. She quickly prepared more food for him before washing her hands and getting started on her own. She had agreed to have Taehyung pick her up at 8 the next morning. If not for the fact that he’d been on her last nerve, she might be anxious. Instead she wondered how to get it over with as quickly as possible.
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After cooking dinner and showering, Camille crashed hard. It was fulfilling but exhausting being around all the anxious energy that came with brides and their parties.
Around seven the next morning she woke up and dug around to find clothes. Settling on a casual dress and heels, she grabbed her purse and headed down to the lobby after giving Cairo a bit of extra love.
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“You look nice. Thanks for uh, coming.” Taehyung said, clearing his throat. “Thank you. Just go to the nearest shopping center. I looked at the wedding book so I have a decent idea of a fitting look. Did you have anything in mind?” She asked.
“I mean, Yuna always complains about how I dress. I just don’t want the hissy fit that will come with me dressing the way I want to for her wedding.” He said. Camille chuckled. “I mean, your shoes are ugly but other than that I don’t think your style is bad.” She shrugged.
“I love these shoes.” He complained. “By label?” She teased.
“I’m starting to think you’re just mean. First you put my sister in a semi sheer wedding dress when I begged for modesty and now you make fun of my favorite pair of shoes.” He poked. She chuckled. “Okay, I’ll leave you be. Anyway, you said you’re an entertainer, are you willing to elaborate? You look a bit too squeaky for rock band.” Camille explained.
“Well, it’s a boy band.” He explained. “Ah, makes sense.” She nodded. “In what way?” He wondered. “Nothing. Just saying. Anyway, you’re really going all out for your sister’s wedding and I have to admire that.” Camille replied.
“You must get tired of hearing about weddings?” He asked. “No. Not really. I love wedding dresses and helping brides find them. It gives me a real sense of satisfaction.” She said. “That’s good then. Do you think it will take away from your own wedding?” He asked.
“I’m not concerned about that right now. I’m not having my own wedding anytime soon. For all I know, I could have been out of this job for years by the time that comes up.” She replied. “So you’re not seeing anyone? That’s a bit surprising.” He mumbled. “Yeah, until you get to know me maybe. What about you? Are you going to cry when you get married and your wife wears a semi-sheer wedding dress?” She teased.
Taehyung laughed. “Well, I don’t even have a girlfriend. It’s not as if I have reason to be concerned either.” He shrugged. “I see.”
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Arriving at the shopping mall, Taehyung pulled on a pair of large shades. “Are those really necessary?” She scoffed. “You would be surprised. Now lead the way.”
They started in an upscale department store. “Are you open to alterations? I think that since you’re so slim, getting whatever we pick tailored would be good.” Camille explained, holding one of the jackets up to his chest. “Whatever you suggest is fine.” He said.
“Okay. You have beautiful skin and it won’t clash with the wedding. I want to put you in blue or all black.” She said, thinking aloud. “Beautiful skin?” He grinned. “Yes. Your complexion is nice. I’m sure you know that though.” He replied. “Eh, where I come from its taken one of two ways. I don’t hear that often.” He replied.
“Oh, well, I guess we have that in common. You’re welcome.”
Taehyung was easy to dress because he did look good in so many things. She picked out a few different sets before sending him to the fitting room.
When he came out of the first few times she was mildly displeased and set him back. The fifth or sixth time, she was nearly stunned to silence. “Try this tie.” She said, offering it to him. He looked down at it. “You don’t like it?” She frowned. “No I just...can’t put it on.” He admitted, flushed. She chuckled.
“Oh, if that’s all it’s easy. I’ve assisted at enough weddings for this.” She replied, reading the tie around his neck. Taehyung looked down at her. She offered him a smile before focusing on tying everything and getting it straight.
Once she finished tying the tie, she smoothed down the front of his suit before stepping back and appraising the look. “This is it. Do you like it?” She asked. He turned to look in the mirror. “It’s nice.” He nodded. “Good. We’ll get shoes and then I’m going to take you to see our tailor.” She said. “Sounds good.” He grinned. Camille had really forgotten just how handsome he was when he was getting on her nerves. But now, it suddenly flooded back to her. “I’ll be looking in the shoe section. Bring that with you.”
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“That didn’t take very long.” Taehyung said, thoughtful.
“Did you expect it to?” She asked, mildly amused.
“I’m not sure. I just thought it would take longer than two hours. You work fast.” He mused.
“It’s a gift. Anyway, you don’t have to pay me for it. It’s not that big a deal.” Camille asked. “Can I at least treat you to lunch?” He wondered. “I can’t turn that down. I’m physically starving.” She replied. He laughed. “I know a good place.”
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“You seem to have a very vested interest in fashion.” Taehyung said.
“I wanted to be a designer. Things just didn’t pan out quite right.” She admitted.
“That’s a shame. What held you back?” He asked.
“Lots of things it just...wasn’t what I thought it was. I’m happy as things are now.” Cami expressed.
“That’s good then. So tell me, are you going to eat all that?” He teased, looking at her plate. “Me? Absolutely.”
Lunch was all laughs and jokes. Camille couldn’t remember the last time she had this much fun with someone who wasn’t one of her long time friends. She was almost a bit disappointed as everything wrapped up. Taehyung drove her home shortly after. “Hey, I don’t want to be weird about this but..., would you like to go to the wedding...with me?” Taehyung offered. “Would that get you in some kind of trouble?” She asked. “No.” He replied. “Then..., sure. Let’s do that.” Camille replied. “So I guess...I’ll see you when alterations are done?” Taehyung asked. “If you want.” She said, unsure. “I’ll call. Thanks again.”
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Taehyung didn’t call. Two weeks passed and Camille wondered what exactly had changed. Why he’d lied. With a resigned sigh, she reclined on the couch, Cairo curling himself up in his lap.
“You’re such a good boy. I’m so lucky to have you.” She cooed, scratching behind his ears. He purred. “I should take you to the park tomorrow, huh? You don’t get out much.” She sighed.
She turned on a movie and set her alarm. In no time at all, she was sleep.
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Alterations called two months after the suit had been dropped off. Camille was then tasked with contacting Taehyung. She texted him and they eventually agreed to meet there.
“Let’s get this over with. Try it on.” Camille urged. He looked like he wanted to say something but he held his tongue.
“Handsome boyfriend. Your mom never mentioned him.” The tailor, Mrs. Lin grinned. “He’s not my boyfriend. He’s the brother of one of our brides.” Camille quickly explained.
“Really? He has the look.” She replied.
“Occupational hazard. He’s a celebrity.” Camille replied.
“I know it’s been a couple of weeks but I still can’t tie this.” Taehyung commented, exiting the dressing room with the top of his shirt unbuttoned and the tie lying across his neck.
Camille stepped forward to quickly remedy the situation, buttoning his shirt up, too. “Mrs. Lin, your work is incredible as always. He looks excellent.” Camille said, looking him over. “You give me too much credit. I just fix the clothes.” The elder lady replied, blushing.
“How does it feel? You can move and everything, right?” Camille asked, looking back at Taehyung. He nodded. “Good. I guess that settles everything. Mrs. Lin, really...thank you again.” Camille said. “Just doing my job, dear.”
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Camille headed to her car, hitting her key to unlock the door.
“Camille, wait.” He called she ignored him and opened her door before tossing her purse inside. She closed the door and hooked her seatbelt. Seeing he was still standing there, she rolled down her window.
“What do you need? Some other service I can offer you, perhaps?” She asked. He cringed. Camille rolled her eyes. “Can we just..., talk? Could we go to lunch or something?” He asked.
“This is my lunch break. I need to be back to work in twenty minutes.” She said, glancing at her watch. “Dinner?” He asked. She scoffed.
“What would I agree to go to dinner with you for?” She asked. “Well, you’re still my date to the wedding right?” He replied. “I don’t know? Am I?” She replied flatly. Taehyung sighed and ran a hand through his hair. It was light brown when she first met him, Black the second time and now it was an electric blue.
“I’m sorry, Okay? If you give me a chance to explain—,” he started before she cut him off. “You don’t owe me an explanation. I hardly know you. Now, I would hate to be late to work. Have a nice day. I’ll be seeing your sister for alterations soon. Please don’t come.” She replied, switching her car into drive. “Camille, don’t be like that. Please, just dinner?” He asked again. Looking at him it was difficult to say no. “Whatever.”
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“I didn’t think you’d come.” He admitted.
“Some people keep their word. Anyway, what’s your aim here?” She asked, flatly. “I’m sorry I didn’t call. I really did mean to. I got kind of...mixed up and then work picked up. By the time I knew it, a month had passed and I felt like I couldn’t do it then. But in case I wasn’t clear before..., I’m interested in you. Since I first saw you I thought you were so beautiful. More than that... I could somehow see myself with you and I’ve never felt like that before. It probably sounds lame but I did get nervous. I still want you to be my date. If not...I understand. The way I handled things was shifty. So, I’m sorry if I upset you and I appreciate your help picking out the suit and shoes. And tying the tie.” Taehyung explained.
“I...I don’t know what to say. Well, you’re welcome...about the clothes and stuff.” She replied, suddenly a bit uncomfortable. She hadn’t expected him to say anything like that. She’d fully planned him to give some lame apology so she could eat and leave but this felt so...heavy.
“You don’t have to give a response. We could just eat. But also, I really asked your mother for your referral because I wanted to take you on a date. But you found the suit so fast.” He admitted. “Why didn’t you just...ask me regularly?”
“Just because you very clearly were annoyed by me about the dress.” He replied. “You’re right about that.” She nodded. He grinned.
“I’ll still go...to the wedding with you I mean. I already picked out a dress and shoes. And how to do my hair and makeup.” She admitted, a hint of red falling over her brown skin. Taehyung smiled even more at that. It was a quiet dinner but a comfortable one. The beginnings of something. At the end of the night, they parted with waves and the agreement to meet on Saturday.
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“You get cuter every time I see you.” Taehyung teased. Camille was dressed in an oversized sweater, jeans and sneakers. They’d agreed to meet for lunch once again.
“Ugh, Cairo.” She sighed, brushing off the gray hairs. “Should I ask who that is?” Taehyung asked, raising an eyebrow. “He’s my cat. My roommate really. Do you have any animals?” She asked. “A dog. His name is Tannie.” Taehyung said, flashing her a picture. “How cute.” She grinned.
“Yeah, I miss him a ton when I’m working.” He sighed. “Right it must be a lot to travel with him.” She nodded. “I take him sometimes but things are just so busy.” Taehyung lamented. “I can’t be separate from Cairo for more than a day. He’s my baby.” She replied. “Is he dog friendly?”
“He’s everything friendly.” She confirmed. “Good to know. I was thinking we could eat a bit lighter and perhaps do some shopping?” Taehyung offered. “Sounds okay to me.” She nodded. He offered a hand and she reluctantly took it. “Wow, your hand is so small.” He teased. “I think you’re just a bit big.” She chuckled.
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“I had a good time. Not like I needed to spend so much money though.” Camille laughed as he pulled into the parking lot of her complex.
“I had a good time too. And I did offer to pay.” He reminded her. “I know, I know. I guess I’ll see you...soon?” She asked.
“I hope so. Hey, don’t forget your milkshake.” He warned. She reached for the cup but before she had a firm grip on it, he let it go. The cup fell and the strawberry drink painted his lap.
“Oh my gosh. I’m sorry. Uhh..., just come up to my place. I will clean your pants for you. I might have some sweatpants you can wear till then.” She replied, frazzled.
“Cami, it’s fine. But sure, I’ll come up. I’d love to meet the man of the house.”
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“Cairo, we have a guest.” She called, letting Taehyung in. He took his shoes off.
“The laundry is in there. I’ll go grab those sweatpants.” She explained. He nodded.
She passed Cairo napping in the extra room before closing the door, so not to disturb him. She shuffled through her closet before finding the sweatpants her friend had left behind.
She walked back before knocking on the laundry room door. Once Taehyung answered she handed him the sweatpants before heading back to her room to find a pair for herself. When she re-emerged, Taehyung was manspread on her couch and she thought she might die. She cleared her throat.
“I’ll uh, throw your stuff in the washer. Do you want something to drink? Or maybe a snack?” Camille offered. “I’m fine, thanks.” He replied. Nervous my ass. Camille thought to herself. She really hadn’t thought too deeply when she invited him up and now that he was there, the apartment felt too small. Too private.
She threw his pants into the washer and rejoined him. She took a seat on the edge of the couch, a bit away from him. “You can sit closer.” He offered. “No I...I think I’m fine.” She mumbled. “These are big sweatpants.” He mused. “They’re a friend’s.” She replied. “A friend I should worry about?” he wondered. “Chan? No.” Camille laughed. “Are you sure?” He replied.
“He’s married to my cousin. We’re all very close. He was just in town for something and I let him stay here so he wouldn’t have to book a hotel.” She nodded. “Good.” He nodded.
“Aren’t you getting a bit ahead of yourself?” Camille teased. “Nope. I’ve pretty much decided that this is set in stone.” He declared. She scoffed. “As if that’s a one person decision. Don’t be presumptuous.” She warned.
“Camille, you definitely like me.” Taehyung replied. “I wonder how much longer it will take those pants.” She replied, changing the subject. “It’s only been five minutes.” He pointed out. “Points were made. I’m grabbing a drink.” She sighed, standing. When she returned from the kitchen, Taehyung again offered her a closer seat and she reluctantly took it. He’d turned on some art documentary. “You interested in this stuff?” She wondered. “Yeah. I like art. I would’ve taken you to the museum today but I didn’t want to be cliche and you seem to open up a bit more in the comfort of clothes.” He explained. She grinned. “Nothing wrong with cliche dates. But yes, I feel in my element around clothes.” She nodded. “I get why. Can I see your dress for the wedding?” He asked.
“Eh, maybe that’s better as a surprise.” She replied. “But you’ve seen what I’m wearing.” He reminded her. “Yeah, But...,” she started before trailing off.
“Okay, what about your closet in general?” He asked. “Who asks that?” She replied, baffled. “You’re very into fashion. I feel like that’s one way to get closer to you.” He shrugged. “Oh...okay.” She reluctantly caved. He enthusiastically followed her down the hall to her room and into her closet. “It’s so organized. I’m jealous.” He said, looking around.
“Well, it makes it easier to get ready for work half awake.” She lightly joked. He chuckled. “This is a nice dress.” He said, pointing out her red body con. “I’m sure you would think that.” She replied. “Really, you probably look really nice in it. Then again, you look nice in everything.” He nodded. “You’re so full of it.” Camille laughed. “I’m being honest.” He shrugged.
Then, he paused, as if he spotted something out of the corner of her eye. She was suddenly struck. The lingerie..., it wasn’t as if she planned for him to come in her closet. She would’ve moved if otherwise.
“Now this...is quite unexpected.” He said, pulling down one hanger. “Oh my gosh, put that back!” Camille complained, reaching to snatch it from him, he moved. “Have you worn this before?” He wondered. “Taehyung please.” She mumbled, beyond embarrassed. “You should put it on.” He declared. “Are you crazy?” She balked. “No? I would just really love to see you put this on. You don’t have to though, if I’m overstepping I’m sorry.” He quickly apologized. “It’s not..,” she started before trailing off. “I really didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” He cringed. “I’ll put it on.” Camille decided. He balked. “You’ll what?”
“I said I would put it on. Wait in the room.” She said. He swallowed before nodding and making himself scarce. Closing the door to the closed, she stripped down and took her time to put the set on correctly. She even put on her favorite studded red bottoms.
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“Is any of today real?” Taehyung wondered, in disbelief as he looked her over. She resisted the urge to duck back into the closet in favor of looking down and taking small steps towards him.
“You look...you’re so...how?” He mumbled. “Is is...good?” Camille asked. “Camille..., you look amazing. I’d say I have a fairly active imagination and you’re really blowing all my expectations away. I don’t deserve this.” He replied. His eyes were constantly looking over her, she couldn’t help but feel a bit boosted. She smiled, shyly.
“And you’re so fucking cute.” He groaned. “Well uh, I think I should change back now.” She decided, retreating to the closet. He seemed to be fine with that. She closed the door behind her and when she turned it back it immediately closed and reopened again, she turned to him, flustered. “Can I...can I kiss you?” He asked. She nodded before she really thought about it. He turned her around, cupped her face and pressed his lips to hers in seconds. She opened her mouth to him quickly as he overtook her. One hand moved to the back of her neck while the other slid down to her ass. There was a rub, then a slap and a grab. She moaned into the kiss. He pulled away.
“I’m sorry. I think I got a bit carried away. I don’t want to move to quickly. I really do like you.” He quickly apologized. “Who said it was moving too quickly?” Camille asked before sliding down onto her knees. Taehyung’s eyes went wide for a moment before he grinned.
“Are you really offering me?” He wondered? She slid her hand up his leg before palming him through the sweatpants. “Why don’t you find out?” She teased.
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“I think I’m actually dead. That’s it.” Taehyung said, looking at her bedroom ceiling. “You’re so dramatic.” She chuckled, laying her head on his chest.
“As I said, I must be dead. There’s no way that just happened. Right now you’re cuddled up to me in a fuzzy sweater and shorts but like ten minutes ago you blew me in lingerie and heels.”
“You’re going to make me self-conscious if you keep bringing it up.” Camille groaned. “I just..., I don’t know how I can top that. What can I do for you?” He replied.
“Nothing. I just like laying here and holding your hand.” She admitted. “I really have the cutest girlfriend.” Taehyung said, wistfully. She giggled.
“Girlfriend. I like the sound of that.”
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“So..., your sister came in for alterations.” Camille said, sitting up and pulling his t-shirt over her head.
“Please don’t be mad.” He sighed.
“We’ve been dating for months and I’m your date to her wedding and she has no idea?” She replied.
“I’ve hardly talked to Yuna. But i will tell her.” Taehyung assured her. “Can you promise me that? I’ve dated interracially before. I know how it is, I just hoped you weren’t like that, Tae.” She said, looking back at him. “I’m not. Yes, I promise you. Don’t worry, Okay?” He said, reaching and wrapping his arms around her waist to pull her back to him.
She giggled as he nuzzled into her. “You’re my girlfriend that I adore very much. I promise I just hadn’t gotten around to it. I’m not playing you and I’m not keeping you a secret. I’ve even told my members about you. They want to meet now and I said I’d ask when you were free, but I want your free time for myself.” He teased, tickling near her ribs. As she was overcome with laughter she attempted to crawl away from him. Of course to no avail.
“Okay, okay. I’d love to meet them. A lunch break maybe?” She offered, catching her breath.
“Sounds good to me. Now lay back down. I’m suddenly a bit hungry.”
——
Months with Taehyung passed like hours. It had been three months already when he brought he to meet his groupmates. Six boys much too handsome for their own good, but none as handsome or charming as Taehyung himself.
“No wonder he doesn’t bring you to the dorm. I’m surprised you see the light of day. I don’t think I’d ever leave if I had you waiting at home.” Hoseok flirted. “You’re too kind.” She replied, laughing.
“Don’t mind him. He’s gross. It’s nice to meet you.” Jimin said, offering his hand. Camille shook it. “It’s nice to meet you all, too. I’ve heard a lot about you. Taehyung adores you guys.” Camille poked.
“It’s been a long time since we all met. We’re a family of our own.” Jin said, smiling. “That’s really sweet.” Camille replied.
“How long have you two been together?” Jungkook wondered. “A couple months. I met her when I went wedding dress shopping with Yuna.” Taehyung explained. “Oh, weren’t you pissed about that?” Namjoon asked.
“Yeah. He was calling me weekly to complain about it.” Camille replied, laughingly. “I’m telling you, when you see that dress you’ll understand.” Taehyung explained. “I mean your sister is hot so—,” Jungkook started before Jimin whacked him.
“Maybe you don’t need to come to the wedding.” Taehyung complained. “She invited us.” Yoongi reminded him. “He’s just being difficult. But we all know Yuna gets what Yuna wants.” Camille teased.
“Don’t tease me, Ms. I have a whole room in my apartment just for my cat.” Taehyung poked. “Cairo needs his own room so I don’t disturb him when I come in. He’s a big boy, I just give him what he deserves.”
“Big? That cat almost fits in my hand.” Taehyung replied. “Are you saying your hands are small?” She challenged. He balked. “You’re right. He’s a big boy.” Taehyung nodded. The others laughed.
“You two...I like it.” Yoongi declared. “Yeah, it seems like you two are good with each other. The fact that we’re meeting means a lot.” Namjoon assured her. “Well..., that makes me feel a bit better.” She admitted.
“I told you I wasn’t being shifty.” Taehyung replied. “Yeah, I know. But people lie and I haven’t known you that long. But like I said, that makes me feel better.” She said, squeezing his hand. “You’ll be at the wedding, right?” Jungkook asked. Camille nodded. “That should be fun, then.” Hoseok smiled. “I love weddings.” Camille admitted.
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Between work and other things, the next few months blew by, all the time, Taehyung and Camille grew closer.
“You’re back from work.” Camille cheered, crawling into bed. He’d had a key to her apartment for a little over a month. His returns were often a surprise, as they’d had a string of concerts recently.
“Oh, you’re off early.” Taehyung yawned, rolling over and lifting his arm to invite her closer. She cuddled up to him. “I missed you. You told me you wouldn’t be back till the wedding in two weeks.” She mumbled, burying her head in his chest.
“Well, I had some time and I wanted to see you.” He said, his voice heavy with sleep. She heard purring and looked to see Cairo laid on the foot of the bed. “Oh, you were bonding with my boy?” She teased. “I think he came to assault me then got lazy.” Taehyung joked. They both laughed. “I’m going to put Cairo in his bed. Are you hungry? Should I cook?” Camille asked. “You just got in from work. I’ll call takeout.”
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“Can I kiss you?” Camille asked, looking into Taehyung’s eyes from her spot on his lap. “Do you have to ask?” He grinned. She leaned forward and kissed him twice. “The wedding is soon, have you talked to Yuna?” Camille asked. “I’m meeting her for lunch tomorrow and I swear I will tell her then.” He replied. Camille frowned and climbed off of his lap. “Babe..., please don’t be mad at me.” Taehyung sighed. “Tae..., you’ve had all this time and yet...,” she replied, frustrated. He picked up his phone. “Give me a second.” He said, unlocking his phone and dialing a number. It rang a few times.
“Tae? What’s up? You’re not cancelling lunch, right?” Yuna asked. “No, no. Of course not. I wanted to talk to you about my plus one. My girlfriend.” He explained. “Just bring her tomorrow, Tae. I’m about to get a massage.” She replied before hanging up. “Can you take your lunch break with us?” He asked. She sighed. “I’m really not trying to keep you secret. I don’t mean to make you feel bad. I’m serious about you. I promise.” He said, pulling her back by her waist.
“Taehyung..., I love you.” Camille admitted. “And I love you, too. Trust me, please.” He said, nuzzling into her neck. He placed a kiss on her neck. She turned her head to give him a kiss. “Mmm, let’s go to your bedroom.” He offered. “You think you’re getting some tonight?” She asked, raising an eyebrow. “I know I am.” He grinned, stealing another kiss. “Only if you do all the work.” Camille folded. “There a whole lot to work with. I can handle it.” He said, scooping her up.
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“I never get tired of this.” Taehyung groaned, looking her over as he peeled the layers of her clothing off. “Oh yeah?” She asked. “I think it gets better each time. You just look so good.” He replied, unclipping her bra. “Do you have to keep the light on, though?” She mumbled, feeling suddenly self-conscious.
“Camille, you’re beautiful and I want to be able to see you.” He said, leaning down to kiss her. As promised she allowed him to control the pace. He gradually moved from her mouth to her neck and down to her chest. His hand slipped down between her legs. “You tease too much.” She moaned. “I just want you to be ready.” He grinned against her skin before kissing down to her bellybutton. She giggled.
“How are you still so ticklish.” Taehyung teased. “Stop tickling me and get to it.” She complained. Taehyung chuckled and slipped his finger inside. Her laughs turned into moans. “Maybe...two?” He teased, adding another. He set a rhythm and she was quick to run with it. In no time she was panting and moving against him. “Taehyung please, just do it.” She whined. “Do what, Camille?” He teased. “Fuck me, please.” She groaned. “Is that what you really want?” Taehyung poked. She was near tears. “Yes. Please.”
“Don’t cry, baby. I’m taking my time tonight. You want to be convinced, right?” He reminded her, removing his fingers and sticking them in his mouth. “I just want you to hurry up.”
He shifted to wedge himself between her legs. “This is what you want?” He asked, pressing his tip to her core. She nodded, whimpering. He was quick to push all the way in. She gasped. “You feel so good. God, I love you.” Taehyung moaned. “Please, move.” Camille moaned. He moved but he set a slow and punishing pace. It was more like torture and Camille was close to losing it.
“I love you so much. You’re mine.” He repeated. “Then show me.” She moaned.
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“I really do love you and I see us being together for a very long time. Don’t forget that.” Taehyung said, tangling his legs with hers.
“I love you, too. Please keep being as honest as you are with me.” She requested. He grinned and kissed her three times.
“I will. Get some rest. I didn’t want to wear you out tonight.” He replied. “You didn’t. I’m just really glad you’re here.” She replied. He stroked her hair and she gradually relaxed before eventually falling asleep.
Taehyung was still sleep when she left for work. She showered him with kissed and headed out.
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She helped a client find bridesmaid dresses in the morning and made it to lunch a bit late. Taehyung and Yuna were already seated and happily chatting away. She was suddenly nervous. Unsure...scared. She couldn’t join them...could she? Just as she began to seriously consider turning and walking out, Yuna caught her eye. The was a brightness before she smiled and waved her over. Taehyung turned in her direction as well before smiling.
“You’re late.” He pointed out, taking her hand as she sat. “Sorry..., things a work ran a little long.” She apologized, slightly uncomfortable.
“It’s fine. Nice to see you again. You know, I told my mom that I thought Tae had a crush on our bridal consultant.” Yuna said, smiling. “I don’t know about that.” Camille replied, laughing. “I did, from the beginning.” Taehyung confirmed. “How did he move in on you?” Yuna teased.
“He said he needed help finding a suit for the wedding and asked my mother for a referral.” Camille replied. “Ha, classic. You’d think he’d have the balls to ask flat out.” She poked. Taehyung scoffed. They laughed. “Really, you’re very cute and as long as you treat him very well, I’m fully in support.” Yuna said.
“That means a lot. Thank you.” Camille replied. “No need to thank me. I’m glad you’re coming to the wedding to see me in that dress you picked though.” Yuna smiled. “I’m looking forward to it.”
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“You have to go back to work?” Taehyung asked. Camille nodded. “I’ll see you tonight, okay?” He asked. She nodded.
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The morning of the wedding, Camille was ready bright and early in her yellow 2-piece dress set.
She arrived at the venue and sat where her mother waved her. It was nice to be attending a wedding rather than helping with one.
“Look who it is?” She turned and smiled, seeing Jungkook and the others. He took the seat next to her. “It’s nice to see you all again.” She smiled. “You too, this place is beautiful.” Jin said, looking around. “Yeah, my mother really does know how to put on a wedding.” She mused.
“Taehyung should be around soon. He was having a last minute chat with Yuna.” Namjoon assured her. She nodded, understanding. Camille didn’t bother mention the fact that she knew that well because he had called her before or that she could wait because they had spent the night together, she just nodded.
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“Okay...I’ll give it to you. You were right. Yuna looked like a princess and most importantly, she was happy.” Taehyung said, hugging Camille close to him as everyone dance. The wedding had blown by and as things winded down, the closer he pressed to her.
“Told you I know my stuff. Speaking of which, you look even better than I imagined in these clothes.” She replied, pulling away just a bit to smooth down the front again. He smiled. She leaned on her tip toes and kissed him. “And you look so cute today. A good surprise.” He replied, kissing her lightly again.
He grinned. He looked around before pulling her to the side. “Looks like my parents are done mingling. Do you want to meet them?” He offered. “I would love to.”
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Camille was pretty giddy when they returned home. They removed their shoes at the front door before she squeaked as Taehyung swooped her up and basically jogged to her room. He closed the door behind them before setting her to her feet. Immediately, Camille began undressing.
“Aren’t you eager?” He teased. “You ran in here carrying me.” She reminded him. “Touché. Go lay down on bed, baby.” He urged. She looked up at him. “I’ll follow, don’t worry.” He urged. Camille turned and walked over before sitting on the bed and working to get the rest of her dress off.
Taehyung reached into his coat pocket. “So I talked to Yuna today before the wedding.” He said. Still occupied undressing she didn’t immediately look his way. “I know. She’s lucky to have such a sweet brother.” She replied. “I really needed her opinion.” He said.
Camille furrowed her brows. “What for? I kept you from wearing those hideous shoes.” She replied. Taehyung laughed before approaching her and kneeling down in front of her. He had her attention now. She looked down at him, curious. “As a woman getting married I thought she was in the mind frame to tell me if this was good enough...for you?” He said, pulling out the square velvet box and opening it. The shock on her face was immediate, her hands flew to her mouth. “She said it was lovely but I still have doubts because I don’t think I could find a ring good enough for you. Or that anyone could make one that special. I don’t know who would be your go-to bridal consultant now or how I’ll find clothes for the wedding without your help..., but I think it will be okay? Even if you wear a sheer dress? And I wear my hideous shoes?” He continued, clearly a bit nervous.
“Are you serious? You really...want to marry me? Will it be okay? Will you be okay with me?” Camille asked, suddenly crying. “Okay? With you? Camille..., you’re much more than I ever could have expected. If you’ll have me, I’ll take care of you, Cairo and Tannie forever. So...what do you say?” He asked. “I would love...to marry you.” He slipped the ring on and she practically tackled him to her floor, her arms around his neck. He chuckled, catching her and bracing for impact. She kissed him. “I love you.” He whispered when she pulled away from his lips to hug him again.
“Not as much as I love you.” Camille quipped. “I’m sure I have you beat.” He grinned. “You’ll change your mind when we get through what I’m about to do to you.” She assured him, reminding him of her state of undress.
“I do like the sound of that.”
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I feel exhausted. I felt exhausted all day. Im sure its just because I didnt sleep great and today was long and hot. But I just feel pretty beat up. I just took a bath though that was pretty nice. But I am more excited to get some sleep.
Today wasnt a bad day, but I did feel frazzled. I woke up at 630 because they asked us to be there 15 minutes early. But I couldnt do it. I snoozed my alarm and honestly I was right to because it didnt even matter because again by the time I got there, at 740. We just sat at the office until almost 830. Again. This happens every day. I hate it. Like I have so much I could be setting up and doing, or even sleeping an extra half hour. Or just sitting and eating my breakfast. I even understand why the regular counselors might want to chill and talk to eachother but I am just. Not happy standing there. Its fine. It will be fine. But I had so much to do and get ready to run a good program. So the wasted time makes me feel stupid. And now Alexi just emailed me to ask if I could run the check in on the other side of the camp. And while I would love to just say yes and jump into helping, I would lose the half hour of set up time I get if they do make me do that. I already barely have enough time. So I just feel so frustrated with that. Like the rest of the day is great and I felt very heard about the schedule concerns before. But the mornings make me feel so stressed.
The check in went better then expected though. I think we are doing a really good job of running that. I took temperatures and talked to Charlotte. But soon enough I had to run up to art. \
I had to make a pit stop at my car because I forgot my phone in the cupholder and I left my charger pack at home so I had to get the car charger and I was sp frazzeled over it. And I just was worried about stuff all day. I hate forgetting things.
Art was excellent though. We started the plaster casting project and everyone really seems to enjoy it. And I think I am finally comfortable with having the project be the first half of the hour, and then having free art making for the second half. Everyone seems to have fun and is happy so that seems to be the best way to go right now. Well see how it goes with the bigger kids.
I had my first shift of covering the pool. And that was fun. The kids are all just so sweet. I got to watch them take the swim test and was so proud of them. And once they were allowed in the pool I got to put my legs in the water for a long time. It was so nice.
I was a little confused this afternoon though. I apparently thought it was tuesday all day because I kept reading the wrong day schedule. So I thought I had my break but then another group came! Good thing I was already set up. All the kids were fun though and the counselors were pretty good too. I did feel a little frustrated because again, when everyone gets to me the first thing I say is wash your hands, and almost every time they told me "We just did that!" and I say, I know, you are supposed to do it when you leave and when you arrive. Twice. I know its annoying. But we are still in the middle of the pandemic!!! I actually spoke to Alexi at the end of the day because I am still really nervous about spikes in cases and someone getting sick. And it will feel like my fault if something does happen.
But it was a good day with art. I figured out a good way to get the space clean and ready, by having the kids wipe down their areas with babywipes. Excellent. Take one step off my shoulder.
I did get to take a nice nap though and listen to my podcast. It was hot today and I felt tired. But it was still a good time.
The end of the day went well. I worked on a little embroidery. I got to meet the highschool students that Im going to have on wednesday. They are a little scary because they are all very cool and my very dorky jokes just got blank stares. Ah well. Maybe Ill grow on them. Soon enough I could go home.
I made a pit stop to say hi to Lani the rat. Gave her a strawberry. She is so cute. But also very old and now I'm nervous she'll die before Kim gets back. Becsuse everything makes me nervous apparently.
I felt kind of shitty. I just wanted to be home. And soon enough I was here. I had dinner and checked on our island. My second rumpl blanket came! This one is a throw blanket and is slighty smaller. Its also of Yosemitie and its green and pretty (the first one was of the Grand Canyon and is orange). Im going to keep this one at home I think, the other one I will keep at work for emergencies and naps on a chilly day.
I took a bath. And that helped. I did my eyebrows. And now Im sitting in the AC and I wish James was here already but I will wait for him. Im going to go have a piece of toast. I hope you all have a great night and that tomorrow is lovely.
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The Miys, Ch. 59
I am so, so sorry for the delay on this week’s chapter. My hours at work have changed, and on top of it I had to make a 16 hour round trip in the car this past weekend.
The good news is, I have the next 4 days off from work, so I should be able to post on schedule going forward. Shoutout to @charlylimph-blog and @baelpenrose for checking on me when I didn’t post Tuesday. Y’all are awesome.
I woke up to a faint smell, reminiscent of chili, and the whir of atmospheric scrubbers working overtime. Groggily, I sat up and looked around, trying to find a clock that I slowly realized I didn’t own. Instead of flicking open my datapad and scorching my eyes with the light of a thousand suns, I rose to stagger after the sound of laughter coming from my kitchen. I rubbed my eyes as I stepped into the light, only to be greeted by a wolf whistle and a simultaneous cry of dismay.
Still fighting off the blessed sleep of medication, I looked around and tried to reconcile the people in my kitchen with the faces I was expecting. A man too short to live there was standing with his back to me…That must be Alistair. He’s early. Tyche, check. Antoine, check plus bemused grin? Woman with rich, dark skin and flashing white teeth, laughing…
“Xio? Where did you come from?” My nose scrunched in confusion.
“I’m going to say the same place you left your pants,” she teased. “Nice legs.”
I glanced down and realized I was only clothed in one of Conor’s t-shirts. That explained the noise and why Alistair was very pointedly not looking at me. Shrugging, I looked at my sister. “It covers more than some of the clothes people wear on the ship. Should I put on shorts, just in case?”
“Yes!” my assistant yelped. “That would be much preferred, Miss Reid.”
Tyche smirked as I tossed up my hands in resignation and went to assuage Alistair’s modesty. When I returned, he was still bright red but at least facing me. Xiomara broke the silence. “Who are we still waiting on?”
“Conor and Maverick,” Antoine supplied. “Then we’ll make Maverick’s dinner while he’s in the shower and we can all eat.”
Comprehension dawned on her face. “That’s right… the food thing. He doesn’t eat curry, I take it?”
I shook my head. “Not a huge fan, no. Sometimes he can handle vindaloo, but he’s been stressed, so we aren’t pushing it. Falafel and papadums for him.” I braced for some remark, but it never came.
“More for me,” she grinned, leaning on the counter to sneak a piece of meat before having her hand swatted away by Antoine.
“Conor eats enough to make up for it, believe me,” Tyche fake-grumbled, just as the men in question walked in.
“To make up for – oh! Curry night!” He gave a wide but exhausted smile as he waved Maverick toward the cleaning unit. “Your turn to go first, mate.” Maverick just nodded and dropped a kiss on each of our cheeks before retreating to wash off the dirt and sweat he was covered in. “Is this mine?” Conor murmured in my ear as he tugged the hem of my shirt.
“Shorts are Mav’s,” I pointed out. “I took a nap and woke up to find myself invaded.”
“You weren’t invaded,” Tyche argued. “We all arrived on time, but Grandma Kim said to let you sleep and that she would be checking when you woke up to make sure. Before you get upset – “ she held up a hand to stop any objection I had, “it’s just a medical alert, and well within her job to set one. She isn’t here to sic Lyric on any of us, so I’m guessing you got enough sleep for her.”
Antoine cleared his throat pointedly. “Not quite. She asked me to have you take another dose two hours after dinner.”
“Antoine…” I whined with utmost dignity. “You’re her boss. You can override her request, right?”
All vain hope was dashed by the flat look he levelled in my direction. Guess not.
“Another dose? Of what?”
My stomach sank as I remembered the sweaty Irishman currently draped around my shoulders. “Let’s wait until dinner, and I’ll tell you and Maverick first thing. I promise,” I turned my head to look in his eyes. “I just don’t want to repeat it, and it’s not fair for either of you to find out before the other.”
Eventually, everyone was washed and seated at the table. As I started to spoon some curry and lentils on my plate, Tyche cleared her throat and gave a pointed look. Rolling my eyes and dropping my head back with a sigh, I snagged a papadum before speaking. “I got sent home from work today,” I started. “I fell asleep after several cups of Xiomara’s coffee, had a nightmare that left me screaming and hysterical. A medical scan showed that I have severe vitamin deficiency and exhaustion, so I was sent home to chug a vile concoction from GK and take a nap. Hence the pajamas.” I waved at myself in demonstration. “Noah wanted me to go to a medical bay for IV treatment and monitoring, but this was the compromise.”
“And if you aren’t better tomorrow, you’re going to the medical bay,” Maverick stated in a tone that most people used to explain that water makes things wet.
Conor apparently agreed, judging by the enthusiasm of his nod. “I encourage this and will do so – “
“Physically if necessary,” I finished for him. “Noah said the same thing. I was wondering where he got that from.”
“I got it from Antoine.”
The sound of three utensils being dropped was followed by deafening silence. Tyche, Xiomara, and I gaped at Antoine as he became very focused on the food in front of him. “This tastes of caprine… is that what it is meant to taste of?”
“Yes, it’s supposed to be goat, and don’t change the subject,” my sister grumbled. “Who did you threaten like that?”
“I am a nurse, Tyche!” he defended. “I say that quite often to recalcitrant patients, especially the elderly. They do not like being treated for ailments – they think it means they are falling apart in their old age. They often do not realize or understand that they will live longer if they simply get the treatment they need.”
“Speaking of falling apart,” Maverick interjected. “We finished testing on the samples from the failed swimming platforms.”
Xiomara leveled her fork like a weapon, first at Tyche and Antoine. “You? Hush.” She turned to a cringing Maverick. “You, speak. Now.”
“Yes ma’am,” he gulped around an unholy mouthful of falafel and ketchup. “The researchers tested samples from every individual piece of each platform. They were able to determine that the accelerated failure of the pieces was the cause of an iron-eating bacteria, not any flaw in the manufacturing or construction.”
She nodded at this news. “This is good. Keep going… what’s the bacteria and how do we rein it in?”
“Grey’s people don’t know the answer to either of those,” he answered apologetically.
“So, run it through the Ark’s database.”
“We did. Twice. Even then, it isn’t recognized.”
“Wait,” I stopped them both. “If they don’t know what it is, how do we know what it does?”
Maverick scowled at me like I asked a stupid question and should have known better. “They observed it eating the iron molecules in the metal.”
Okay, so I did ask a stupid question and should have known better. The scowl was fair, point to Maverick.
“Is there any danger to the ship as a whole?” Xiomara pressed on.
“They are trying to determine that now,” he admitted. “Only iron molecules are being… eaten? Processed? Whatever it is, only iron is affected.”
Seemingly satisfied, Xiomara nodded. “Sophia, please consider taking tomorrow to find out whatever is going on?”
My thoughts whirling at the conversational whiplash, I only shrugged. “It’s probably related to the gravity change. You know, increased anxiety, nightmares, all that.” I glanced at Antoine, hoping for confirmation.
Once again, my faith was misplaced. He shook his head, “Non. Gravity changes will cause increased anxiety, yes. But not the level of malnutrition you mentioned. I am aware you eat regularly, if for no other reason than seeing you eat. There is no easily explained reason for you to be in such condition, and as such, I would like you to have tests done if I am not satisfied with your improvement by the end of the day tomorrow.”
“Do I have to?” I groaned. “I hate doctors… no offense, Antoine.”
“I am a nurse, so none taken.”
I felt a tapping on my left shoulder and turned to see Conor leaning across Maverick. “Sophie. Love. I know you hate it. But you wouldn’t let any of us just skive off going to the doctor if we were sick.” He pointed around the table, including Alistair and Xiomara. “If one of us so much as looked a bit droopy, you know you would task yourself with barking at our heels until we were checked out.”
“You did drag me to the medbay when I cut my hand,” Tyche pointed out.
“Annnnd you brought in Antoine when you realized I wasn’t eating,” Maverick chimed in.
Traitors, I thought petulantly.
Silent through all of dinner thus far, my assistant cleared his throat. “Sophia. From what I have seen just working with you, they have a point. If I, for instance, were exhibiting the signs you are showing, would you allow me to continue attending my daily responsibilities and trust that I was addressing the issue outside of my working hours?”
“Blast and BURN it all, why are you all being so logical?”
“Guilt trips don’t work,” Maverick pointed out. “You’ll convince yourself that you are doing the right thing for us all by hiding your symptoms.”
“And working harder just to prove you’re okay,” Conor chimed in.
“Mother henning people….” Xiomara trailed off lazily before flashing a smug grin at me.
“Et tu, Brute?” I begged. “Even you won’t let me work when I’m tired?”
“One,” she ticked off, holding up a finger. “You aren’t just tired, you are somehow malnourished, despite the fact that you are the most social eater I have ever met. Two, I have let you work when you were so-called tired. You literally passed out in my office on multiple occasions – “ She held up a hand when I tried to interrupt and plowed on. “Twice, it was mid-sentence. Three, I’ll even go with you and have tests done on myself, just in case it’s something impacting everyone.”
“Wait – “ I sputtered. “That’s your negotiation? You’ll have tests done on you, and submit to treatment if needed, just to make me go? I’m not a child.”
“Then stop acting like one,” Tyche muttered, glaring at me and knowing full well I heard her.
As much as I wanted to fire back at her, something inside of me wilted. Tyche would never say I was being childish if it wasn’t true. We had literal screaming matches in the past because I was too adult as a teenager. “Fine,” I spat, ashamed. “I’ll go, the day after tomorrow, if I’m still not up to snuff.”
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#the miys#humans are weird#science fiction#humans are space orcs#aliens#apocalypse#original writing#original sci fi#will sophia ever catch a freaking break
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A Tale Of Paper Airplanes Romance And Marshmallows (Prinxiety oneshot)
A fanfiction based on this post by @naoko-shiakuma :
"Virgil is a caretaker who was hired by Remus's parents to take care of him and when Roman came home from school he was met with a cute boy on his living room playing with his little brother."
Characters: Virgil, Roman and kid!Remus + briefly Roman and Remus's parents.
Relationships: Platonic Virgil×Remus, brotherly Remus×Roman and the begining of romantic Roman×Virgil.
Word count: 2.3k
Tw: none
Ao3 link
---
Virgil wasn't normally good with kids.
It's not like he didn't like them, he always thought kids have a pure type of innocence and that their imagination is incredible. He could appreciate the happiness they radiate and loved hearing funny stories about them. At times he envied the smiles that rarely seem to come off their face.
But there's a difference between liking kids and being good with them.
They may be cute and not yet corrupted by our society but they can be little devils if they want to. Whether or not they intend to they seem to automatically and effortlessly cause chaos to erupt whenever and wherever they go.
And Remus Sanders was even worse than that.
Remus was a sweet kid, he had a very strong sense of empathy, which was often ignored due to the trouble he created. He would do everything from spilling juice and the cups and mugs containing it off tables and climbing on cupboards and tables at light speed. He was kind of like a human cat.
Remus rarely caused himself any damage but cleaning up after him was pretty much impossible.
Most people would give up on trying to contain him but Virgil didn't really have that option, the only reason he started babysitting is that he needed the money. He didn't think that there was much of a difference between liking kids and being good with them and when he did it was too late and he couldn't find another job so he had to continue working with Remus.
Virgil usually worked with Remus on weekends, it wasn't like he had anything better to do anyway, unlike Remus's brother who he only knew existed from the pictures of him scattered around the house.
He didn't know much about Roman other than the fact that they were the same age. but he noticed that somehow the dude always managed to make plans for every single weekend.
Virgil would usually show up in the morning at around 11:00. He would usually watch TV with Remus while methodically keeping the remote away from him so he won't raise the volume to deafening levels "on accident" again.
At 12:00 they would make lunch, Remus was fascinated by the chemistry behind cooking and Virgil did his best answering his questions while occasionally spilling something and muttering curse replacements (Fudge, shift, etc... ) That he started using around his friends too.
After lunch they would make dessert or Virgil would try to convince Remus to play some board games with him, ultimately failing and usually having to pick up the content of whatever game he was holding up while doing so.
From that point on they would watch TV, take walks and do whatever Remus suggests or agrees to until 16:00 (4 pm) which is when they would focus on cleaning whatever mess was made throughout the day.
At about five Remus's parents arrived home, paid Virgil and he left, exhausted.
He sometimes got the weekends off because Remus's parents stayed home or they made Roman replace him but that was what happened pretty much every week.
This week was different though.
Remus's parents called Virgil at about 7 am on a Tuesday and explained to him that the teachers at Remus's school are protesting and that they needed Virgil to watch him and due to him still being tired, not wanting to go to school and definitely not the existence of a soft spot in his heart for the kid Virgil agreed to watch him.
He came over to the house about an hour later and saw that it was empty. He used the key he had to open the door and called out to Remus.
...
Nothing.
He started looking for him around the house. After he found nothing he went to the kitchen, started looking through the cupboards and grabbed a bag of marshmallows. He crinkled the bag and called out:
" I have something for you here!"
...
"If you don't come out I'm just gonna have to eat all of these delicious beautiful multi-colored marshmallows by myself!"
He started walking towards the laundry room and Remus jumped out from god knows where making Virgil jump.
"Fine you win I want my marshmallows." He said happily.
"If you say please we can make chocolate milk with them and watch tv." Virgil said teasingly.
"Peassss, can we make chocolate milk??" He said in a high pitched voice.
"What was that?" Virgil said, letting him know he noticed the vegetable in the request.
Remus made a disappointed noise.
"Pretty please?" He said while attempting puppy eyes that were definitely not the most adorable thing Virgil has ever seen.
"Just because it's a pretty please."
Remus jumped up, snatched the bag from his hands and started running to the kitchen, earning an annoyed smile from Virgil.
The rest of the day went by pretty quickly and the only thing that made them notice how much time had passed was the arrival of Remus's brother.
Roman was a pretty social person so it wasn't a surprise that it took him a little longer to get home. He and his friends walked around doing god knows what for some time but after a while passed Roman decided he desperately needed a shower and started walking home.
He walked all the way to his house humming Disney songs which was making him even sweatier than before but he forgot about that and just looked at the people walking around him and the cars that occasionally passed by. After about 15-20 minutes of walking, he got home took out his key and went inside.
The moment he went inside him and Virgil locked eyes.
There was something about him that made Virgil's brain falter a bit. He was wearing a loose tank top that exposed his biceps and stuck to his skin highlighting his athletic build and dark blue jeans that only added to that image because they were pretty tight too. He had messy chocolate-colored hair, but the kind of messy that always looked good, giving him an adventurous look that fit his face perfectly, sticking to it a bit due to him being rather sweaty. His brown eyes weren't too special but at that moment he wished the stories were true and that he could look into them and gaze into his soul. Overall, he was a pretty good looking dude.
And he definitely had something to look at, because when he walked in he saw pretty much the opposite of himself. The person in front of him was wearing all black clothes. He was wearing black skinny jeans and a loose black hoodie that somehow perfectly complimented his pale smooth skin. Everything other than his skin was dark. He had shiny dark brown hair topped by a dark gray beanie and fringe covering his beautiful dark brown eyes. He was one of those people you looked at and couldn't help but wonder what their story was.
Virgil saw the red already existing on Romans cheeks due to the heat get even darker and couldn't help but blush too.
After a few seconds Roman came inside and took the focus off of Virgil to see Remus and him sitting on the floor, surrounded by markers and making paper airplanes. And then it clicked in his mind.
"Oh you're that babysitter our parents hired right?"
"What? Oh yeah yeah, that's me." He said while standing up.
There was a brief moment of silence followed by a:
"Oh my name's Virgil" and his hand awkwardly reaching forward, initiating a handshake.
Luckily Roman had a bit more social skills than him.
"Oh there's no need to be so formal." he said, high or- low fiving Virgil. Earning a shy but happy smile from him followed by an amused huff of air.
"So what were you two doing?"
"We were having a paper airplane competition and you're not invited" Remus joined in.
And before Virgil could say something Roman sat down, threw his bag on the floor, grabbed a piece of paper and said:
"Oh you know I don't need invitations."
Immediately after that they all started working again, only this time Remus was even more motivated to win, wanting to impress Virgil, but more importantly, trying to defeat Roman.
While they were working Virgil noticed a pride flag pin attached to Romans schoolbag and couldn't help but feel a tiny spark of hope which he quickly shut down. Though he couldn't completely forget it and it ended up inspiring the colorful lines at the end of the wings of his paper airplane. Remus's airplane was mostly green but upon seeing Virgil's airplane he added purple green and blue at the exact place Virgil's rainbow was. Roman was the last to finish his paper airplane. He drew a lot of red details that looked like you could find them in a castle and later added highlights in yellow.
Right after he was finished the competition began.
The first to throw his airplane was Roman, they were in the living room and throwing their paper airplanes to the kitchen. His airplane got to the chairs that were on their side of the table which was a pretty good distance. After him went Virgil, hitting the table and falling close to Roman's landing spot.
Remus went last and got past the chairs, landing close to the leg of the table near them but still beating both Roman and Virgil.
He quickly ran over to the table, grabbed their airplanes and called:
"I'm keeping these forever!!!"
Both of them simultaneously yelled "No!" and started chasing him around the house.
The whole deal ended with Remus keeping the airplanes as a souvenir and all of them making more airplanes, this time flying them in the hallway where there aren't any tables to "scare Romans airplanes".
Time went by pretty fast and the only thing that Roman really remembered is him and Virgil reaching for the same marker and touching hands, and Virgil and Remus jokingly fighting over the yellow one.
At the end of the day at about 20:30 (eight-thirty pm) Remus went to bed, almost 40 minutes earlier than usual. Roman and Virgil started cleaning after themselves talking about random topics, it felt like they could keep talking for hours without getting bored or running out of things to talk about. Remus and Roman's parents always worked kind of late. Their mom usually came home after nine so it looked like they had a chance to at least talk for an hour.
"I'm sorry there was barely any romance between them-"
"She tried to warn him about Christmas!! she cared about him!!!"
"Well yes, but it doesn't mean they're in love!!!"
"Dude it means exactly that!!"
"I'm sorry I think they made Jack and Sally a couple just for the sake of having a relationship in the movie."
"Well, clearly it worked so-"
"Ooooooh you know what could have been better??"
"What??"
"If Jack ended up with the guy that called him bone daddy-"
"WHAT! when did that happen???"
"Dude, open youtube and search "The nightmare before Christmas Jacks lament" and it will show you a video of it."
"No way."
"YES WAY"
"THERE IS NO WAY-"
The conversations went from the most ridiculous topics to some serious ones, they were pretty open with each other straight (well no) away and the more they talked- the more they wanted to know about each other. They seemed to form a bond pretty easily and the minutes faded into an hour and the next thing they knew knocks sounded on the door and Remus and Romans mom came in. She was a bit surprised to see Virgil there but took out her wallet, paid him and wordlessly went to check on Remus. Roman walked Virgil to the door and they stood there for a bit. Romans social skills seemed to have disappeared when he said shyly:
"I had a surprisingly nice time today."
"Me too," Virgil said, looking down.
"Sooo... can I, maybe, get your number?"
Virgil looked up again, red visible on his cheeks.
"Hmmm," he feigned thinking for a moment.
"Sure."
Roman's heart did a little dance at that and they both handed each other their phones. After a few moments passed they returned them and locked eyes again. None of them dared to look away.
"Your eyes are beautiful," Virgil said, still gazing into them, searching for a trace of Roman's soul.
Roman smiled but still kept eye contact. He wanted to object but Virgil didn't let him.
"They look like you."
"Thanks?"
Virgil smiled awkwardly.
"Not in a weird way but it's just-, They look pure, and golden, like those Disney princes-, they're just soft and kind of angelic. Like you."
"Yours are beautiful too," Roman said back.
"Kind of like those Disney villains, But in a good way-, I mean, they're kind of dark, and deep, like there's no end to them, and they're smart too, but a silent type of smart, kind of mysterious," he said looking up for a moment, and looking back into Virgil's eyes.
They didn't want the moment to stop but they knew it had to end.
"So... can my "prince" eyes and me take you and your "villain" eyes out for ice cream?"
"When?"
"How about tomorrow?"
"Six-thirty?" Virgil suggested.
"It's a date." Roman winked, getting a bit of confidence back.
"I'll text you the address-"
"And I'll pick you up at six-thirty." Roman said.
"It's a date," Virgil said back.
They both smiled.
"So, I guess this is so long and goodnight then"
"Goodnight Virgil."
"Goodnight Roman."
Virgil hesitated a bit but pressed a kiss to Roman's cheek, sending sparks through his brain and making his heart forget how to beat for a second.
He then proceeded to turn and walk away. Leaving Roman a red-faced mess standing in his doorway, disbelievingly grazing his cheek with the tip of his fingers, looking at his mysterious dark angel gracefully walking away.
#sanders sides#Sanders sides fanfiction#prinxiety#ts virgil#virgil sanders#thomas sanders virgil#roman sanders#ts creativity#creativity sanders#ts anxiety#anxiety sanders#remus sanders#roman and remus#kid!remus#ts the duke#ts intrusive thoughts
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A Kind of Magic
3
“A ‘hello again’ after the final goodbye is sometimes harder than just keeping the goodbye as it was.”
Robyn was laced with extreme guilt as she boarded the plane to head back to Dublin. She had cried as she packed up the last of her belongings in her flat, shoving everything she hadn’t already boxed up and sent home last week into her case. She was so cut up at leaving Taron and had almost told the taxi to go to the hospital rather than the airport but knew it was the right thing to do, even if the decision had plagued her dreams for the last four nights, waking her up with a jump as Taron’s tearful face kept asking her why she left him without saying goodbye.
Work was a good distraction for her as once she stepped in the door on Monday morning, she was met with a new staff member who did not enjoy following the policies of the creche that kept the children and staff safe. She felt like she was dealing with Christina all over again and her healing shoulder took a hard knock when she caught a child who wasn’t sitting on their chair properly and fell, Robyn taking the impact off the corner of the table, rather her shoulder then a child’s head as it was not an accident she could have dealt with her first day back. The reason why she had to step in was because the new staff member left the room to fix a false eyelash that was falling off and she had left the children alone to do so.
It was dreadful start to a Monday that already was blue, as she had to explain to Emma why she was bruised and knackered, leaving the finer details out of what had actually happened. Robyn respected Taron and knew his job came with some unwanted media attention and did not want to put him through the pressure of having the media spin a story so the less people that knew what happened the better, plus Robyn’s hands shook anytime she thought about it and uninvited emotions bubbled up so it was easier for her just to overlook one part of her time away in Florida and throw herself head first into work.
Monday evening found Robyn blaring the Rocketman soundtrack throughout her apartment as she ignored the unpacked case and baked white chocolate chip cookies. It was her way of avoiding reality. Singing and baking, though listening to Taron’s voice was not such a great choice as once Tiny Dancer came on, she found a new ingredient being added to her cookie dough – tears.
Tuesday found her stuck in paper work and it was a great distraction until the constant writing and typing burned her bruised hands, little uncomfortable cramps affecting the time it took to complete her work. However every time she stopped thinking about work, her thoughts immediately flashed to the nightmares that kept her awake all night, where she forgot how to do CPR and Taron’s body lay lifeless under her hands and she could do nothing to help him, Richard screaming at her to save his friend, so even with the increasing discomfort she kept going.
Wednesday wasn’t even worth mentioning, as Robyn’s patience was worn thin after another sleepless night, her case still unpacked and a lemon meringue pie now added to the baked goods in her fridge. False nails were obviously not permitted when working in a creche but Valerie, the newest staff member, was donning long nails and once again Robyn found herself pulling out her supervisory hat to make sure she would be listened too. An hour after Robyn had gotten home, she had two key lime pies in the oven.
The developing heat wave that Ireland was currently facing, was not helping Robyn’s mood as she arrived for work on Thursday morning. Dressed in a pair a black pin stripe high waisted trousers, a white short-sleeved blouse, her trusty converse and her unwashed hair in a messy bun, Robyn was so glad she worked in the office which was the coolest room in the creche, where windows could be thrown open wide to let air in. She had been spoilt in Clearwater with air conditioning available everywhere.
Once again, she found herself, quoting another page of policies to Valerie when Emma came upstairs looking for her.
She followed her manager down the stairs, wondering who on earth could be calling to see her, knowing he was more than likely her mother, checking to see if she had slept the night before. She hadn’t - more upsetting dreams keeping her awake which was why she was so taken aback at seeing the person in her dreams sitting in her chair, that she dropped all the pages she was carrying in her hands.
“Taron!”
Robyn could have sworn she was back in the 7/11 as she looked to the man she had left sleeping in a hospital bed five days previously. His face was coated with a light sheen of perspiration, his hair messy as it stuck up at odd angles, an obvious sign that Taron had ran his hands through it many times. He looked like she felt, just full of pure exhaustion and dog tired but while she could cover her dark eye circles with concealer and make up, Taron didn’t have that option and those black circles under his eyes almost matched the colour of the bruising on his right cheek, his eyes pale and glum, his body language just dejected and miserable.
“Hey Robyn.”
“I am going to give you two a few minutes.” Said Emma as she slipped out of the office, picking up the paperwork Robyn had dropped on the ground, giving them space to talk.
“Taron, I… What…” Robyn for one of the first times in her life was speechless. That was until Taron got to his feet and she had to step forward quickly to steady him, watching as his eyes closed, hearing a groan she was all too familiar with leave his lips. “Taron.”
He had stood up too quickly and a dizzy spell hit him that made him sway but he felt those hands of protection move to catch him. “I am ok. Just stood up too fast.”
“Jesus Taron what are you doing here?” Asked Robyn as she kept her hands firmly on his waist, feeling the heat of his body through his t-shirt. “You should be in a hospital bed.”
Taron placed his hands on her shoulders and looked at Robyn straight in her eyes. “I woke up and you were gone.” And then he pulled the very crumpled letter from his jeans pocket. “And this was left on my pillow.”
Robyn lifted her right hand to her forehead, covered her eyes, her thumb and index finger rubbing away threatening tears before moving her hand down to her mouth, not being able to look Taron in the eye but with no words being exchanged between the two, she had to give in and looked up to him and seeing him fighting his own tears, she threw her arms around his waist pulling his body tight against hers, feeling his arms squeeze her just as hard as she was holding him, his head going straight to her shoulder. She could feel his body quiver against hers, the letter falling from his hands to the floor as he drew her closer to him.
It was a more than a hug. It was an apology and reunion that was filled with unspoken emotion, Robyn running her hands up and down Taron’s back. He lifted his head from her shoulder, giving Robyn the small space she needed to rest her head against his chest, under his chin, his left hand moving to cradle her head and as his cheek rested against her forehead. Robyn could feel the wetness from Taron’s cheeks on her skin and was sure she had left her own tear stains on his dark navy t-shirt but neither were ready to let go yet.
It was a connection that meant so much to Taron and all of his worries about coming to see Robyn melted away as she continued to rub his back and when he saw the tears in her eyes, something Taron never thought he would see from Robyn, he knew she was just as built up with emotions as he was.
It took at least another minute before he felt Robyn start to pull away from him and he reluctantly let her go but even though he felt thoroughly drained, he still found the energy to smile as Robyn lifted her hands to wipe his tears away but as she felt him stagger on his feet she guided him back down to her chair, hunching down in front of him, taking his hands in hers and that small gesture was what Taron had needed and been looking for since he left the hospital and he could feel his whole body melt into her touch, immediately becoming relaxed.
“I have no words that will explain to you how sorry I am that I left you like that.”
“It’s ok Robyn.”
“It really isn’t Taron. It really really isn’t. After everything we had been through; me, you and Richard needed to sit and talk to each other and I just took the cowards way out and I left.” She gave his hands a small squeeze. “I should never have left the hospital Taron. I should have stayed with you at least until you woke up and said goodbye face to face but doing it when you were asleep was so much easier for me but not fair on you and now you have bloody travelled to come and see me because I left a stupid letter for you.”
“And Richard.”
“And Richard. Oh God I had forgotten about the letter for Richard too.” Her head fell down to their intertwined hands.
“Robyn, look at me.” Taron pulled his hands from hers and lifted her chin so she had to look at him and he could see the guilt on her tired face. “Why didn’t you leave a phone number for me?” Robyn had no answer for the question. “I would have loved to have been able to call you and speak to you.”
“Why?”
“Why what?” Asked Taron confused.
“Why would you want to talk to me? I mean once you got to the hospital, you had the doctors to take care of you and Richard was there too for when you woke up. I had done all I could have done to help you.”
“Are you fucking serious?” Taron took her right hand and turned it around so he could see the large dark blue bruise that was still clearly noticeable on the back of her hand and turning her left hand over he could see more discoloured skin on her palm. “You call this ‘all I could have done’. Robyn, you saved my life and your wondering why I would want to talk to you after?” Taron let go of her hands and bent down, stretched and picked up the letter from the floor behind her, not caring about the moan that came with the effort of bending uncomfortably. He opened the letter. “‘I need to get back to my reality and you to yours’. What does that mean? The rest of the letter I could try and make sense of but this…” Taron put the letter on the desk and pointed to the words. “I just don’t know what this means? My reality?” Taron was starting to feel angry at Robyn’s excuses and although he had not planned to confront her immediately, he found it hard to ignore the cryptic message in her letter.
Robyn got to her feet and ran her hands over her face as she started to pace around the small space in the office before she stopped in front of Taron. “Our worlds are very different Taron. I was coming home to this.” She leaned on her desk beside him looking around at unboxed toys that sat on the floor and full packets of nappies that needed to be delivered to the baby room. “And you would be going back to what you are so good at but I know I don’t belong in that ‘entertainment’ world, one that scrutinises every single thing and well, I don’t exactly ooze Hollywood glamour, do I.”
“Do you really think I care about all of that Robyn?” Asked Taron furiously as he stood up, absolutely appalled at what he was hearing. “I know we don’t know each other very well but Jesus.” Taron ran his hands through his hair, completely frustrated with the woman who stood in front of him. “I thought you didn’t care either. The way you spoke about Rocketman filled me with so much pride for the role I played, one I struggled with in many ways but you didn’t even mention the way I looked and you stood up for me in front of that bastard who held a gun to your head in a way that no one ever has. Robyn, did you leave me because you were worried about what people would say about you when the media got a hold of the story of what happened in the shop?”
“Well I don’t exactly fit the movie star look, do I?”
“Fucks sake Robyn.” Taron was starting to see a sudden vulnerable side to his new friend. “I don’t care about any of that shit.” It was a conversation that stung him as he looked at her, strands of blonde hair falling into her eyes, eyes that were wide, bright blue and sad. She looked different in her smart work clothes, her hair tied up from her face, an elegance of authority surrounding her which was the opposite to the laid back look she had in her jeans and t-shirt when he saw her last but it was still the same Robyn standing in front of him that kept him awake and safe in the 7/11 and he didn’t care anymore that she had left him in the hospital.
“Taron…”
“No Robyn. I didn’t take three bloody flights to come and see you and listen to you talk like this. If you left because you think you don’t belong in my world, well that’s bullshit. It’s my world and I get to decide who gets to live in it and you are right up there with my mam, sisters and friends. Robyn I am standing here because of you. I am alive and breathing because you did something for me that I am struggling to cope with and after talking to Doctor Keane, I know you are too. It’s a conversation we need to have, or I need to have at least because you are the only person who knows how I feel at the moment and you are the only person who has been able to stop my hands from shaking by placing your hand in mine.” Taron grabbed her hands in his. “I feel like I am going to either explode or breakdown and the last time I felt like that, you were there to stop that from happening.”
“You helped me too Taron. I told you that in the store, I would have been a very different person if I didn’t have you to keep me occupied. I am so sorry that I left. I just thought it was the best decision.”
“I understand why but don’t let that Hollywood shit get into your head. Please believe me when I say I get it, I have been there but you are a beautiful, selfless and intelligent woman.” Robyn finally looked at Taron and was taken back by how serious his features were as his green eyes darkened with the sincerity behind his words. “And you are going to be stuck in my world for a very long time so you had better get used to it, particularly when my mam gets to speak to you.”
“Your mam?”
“She wants to discuss the ‘simple first aid’ that you told her about.” Taron gave her hands a squeeze. “I don’t care what happened in the hospital. I care that you risked everything to save me, that you did something remarkable for me without a second thought. I just need you to understand that I am struggling with it all and you might be the only person who can help me understand everything I am feeling. Please tell me we are on somewhat of the same page now.”
“We are very much on the same page Taron. I have definitely struggled with the fallout of what happened and honestly, I am finding it hard to believe you are actually here. You have been the subject of my nightmares since I left you.”
Teary blue eyes looked his way and Robyn found herself in a hug that Taron initiated this time, strong arms engulfing her in a proper cuddle, both needing the comfort as their emotions ran high, both finding reassurance and relief from each other.
“I’m really sorry I left.” She mumbled into his shoulder.
“It’s ok. I understand, just don’t leave me like that again, without saying goodbye.”
“Again? Are you planning on repeating what happened in the 7/11 in a shop here?”
“Absolutely not but you have to promise me, we will always say goodbye with a hug just like this one.”
“I promise.” She agreed giving his body a very light squeeze, feeling completely overwhelmed by the fact that Taron had accepted her apology but more so by the fact that he was physically standing in her office.
“Hey Robyn! Is that your boyfriend!”
She lifted her head from Taron’s shoulder to see some little faces looking at her from around the office door, a smile on her face at the preschool children gathered in a group to look into the office, their favourite thing to do before they went outside.
“Hello guys.” Robyn gave Taron a grin as she let him go and side stepped him to look at the four years old who were giving her funny looks, crouching down to be at their eye level at the door.
“Do you kiss him?”
Robyn enjoyed the laugh that came from Taron behind her, only because she had never heard a laugh that sounded so real and genuine from him before, though they never really had the chance to laugh and enjoy it.
“Ewww you can’t kiss boys. Only mammies and daddies can kiss!”
“I kissed Séan.”
“Ewwww!” Came another chorus from the children in front of Robyn along with a lot of giggles and laughter.
“He is just my friend like you are all friends.” Robyn quickly quietened the noise down. She felt Taron crouch down beside her and from the corner of her eye, did not miss the flinch on his face as he moved. “This is Taron.”
There was a chorus of hello’s towards Taron.
“Hello.” He cheerily replied.
“Are you all going outside?” Asked Robyn and another excited response came her way. “And do you all have your suncream on and your hats?”
Taron watched on as Robyn patiently listened to and answered each child, giving each one equal amount of attention, making them feel like they were the most important person in the world as she spoke to them. It very much reminded him of how she made him feel as she took care of him.
“So, you all have your hats and what about your suncream? It is very hot outside.”
“I don’t have any suncream.”
“I’ve got none.”
After Robyn heard another child say they had no suncream she stood up, her patience officially gone. She knew these group of children were from Valerie’s room. Taron had stood up tentatively beside her and saw a complete change in her stance and facial features, very much like the one he had seen when she had stood up to Frankie in the 7/11.
“Taron will you just excuse me for two minutes. Please sit back down in my chair. I will be right back.”
Robyn didn’t turn to look at him but walked out of the office and took two long strides down to Valerie who was in the locker room, holding the door open with her foot as she routed for something in her bag.
“Where are my fucking sunglasses.”
“Watch your language please. There are young children here.”
Valerie turned around and looked at Robyn, almost ready to roll her eyes as she saw the woman who had spent the last four days giving her nothing but grief. Valerie had heard about the supervisor who was due back on Monday and so far, was unimpressed with the blonde who strode around like she owned the place.
“Did you put suncream on the kids?” Asked Robyn.
“Sorry?”
“Suncream. Have you put suncream on the kids? It’s really warm outside. That sun is quite hot.”
“I’m only bringing them out for ten minutes. They will be ok.” Said Valerie as she turned away from Robyn and routed through her bag for her glasses again.
“Actually, no they won’t and it is in our policies.”
“I don’t think I have read that one yet.” Valerie found her sunglasses and as she closed the door of the locker room, Emma came out from the baby room just down the hall, holding some paper in her hand.
“Emma, are they the policies I dropped on the floor a few minutes ago?” Robyn looked to her.
“Yeah they are. You need them?”
“Just the one about the suncream please. The one I updated on Tuesday and got all the staff to sign as we knew the weather was going to be warm this week and we wanted to make sure that all the staff were knowledgeable about the policy before they went outside with the children.” Robyn took the pages of Emma and flipped them over to get to the signatures at the back. “Yeah I thought as much. Ok great. You have read this as you signed it to say that you understood what it says, so that means you know that when it is sunny outside, especially sunny like this, that every child needs to be suncreamed before they get to the garden.”
“I forgot.” Answered Valerie, sulking now that the manager and supervisor were beside her.
“You forgot.” Replied Emma. “Valerie, suncreaming the children is our top priority at the moment and this was mentioned at our staff meeting last week too. You have these children lined up and ready to go outside but they cannot go without suncream. You will have to bring them back upstairs and cream them up.”
“It will be dinner time before I get them all done.”
“I will come and help you.” Said Robyn. “Two of us will get it done really quickly. We will have it done in five minutes and then you can still get them outside for a run for a good twenty minutes before dinner.”
“I can do it.” Said Valerie stubbornly.
“I really don’t mind.” Countered Robyn. She knew her lack of sleep and concerns about Taron were the reason for her short temper and mood but it didn’t mean she wasn’t a team player and at the end of the day the well-being of the children came first.
“I can really do it by myself.”
“I know you can but you were probably looking to get outside yourself to get some air. I know the rooms are incredibly stuffy. Two of us, five minutes, done.”
“I don’t need your help plus you are too busy with that man anyway to help me.”
“Valerie!” Exclaimed Emma. “Apologise to Robyn right now please. You have no right to talk to Robyn like that, who may I remind you, is your supervisor and whatever that man is doing here is none of your business.”
“It’s ok Emma.” Robyn turned to look at all the children who were behind her still lining up waiting to go outside, “Right guys, silly Valerie forgot to put your suncream on, but if you go back upstairs and into the room, she is going to do it really quickly and then bring you outside and if you make sure you have your listening ears on, Valerie has promised that she will take out the parachute for you! And in the afternoon, you can have your tea outside too!” A loud chorus of cheers filled the hallway, Robyn leading them. “Ok well up you go. Make sure you hold the railing.” Robyn turned back to Valerie. “Because you are going to be so busy doing the sunscream by yourself, I have just made your morning so much easier for you by planning your activities. I know being new in a close setting like ours can be daunting but we are all here to help each other and make sure we work as a good team.” Robyn turned to walk away but spun on her heals and looked to Valerie. “And I accept your apology. Make sure you fill in the paper work once you have their cream on and just so you know, that man I was hugging, nearly died five days ago and it was first time I have seen him since I left him in the hospital.”
This time Robyn turned and she walked straight back into the office, with Emma following her and once they were both in, Robyn closed the door.
“I am sorry.” She said immediately.
“No need.” Replied Emma. “You kept your cool and even offered to help her.”
“And planned some activities.” Robyn grinned a little. “She hates doing activities outside with those kids.”
“Only four days back and you are already causing me trouble.” Smiled Emma. “I can’t tell you how glad I am to have you back. I need someone like you to keep staff like her on her toes but you didn’t hear that from me!”
“I am sorry for being a bit cheeky.”
“You did exactly what I would have expected of you. Handled the situation calmly. Oh Robyn, I think your friend is asleep.”
Robyn turned around and could see what Emma meant. Taron was slumped in her chair, his left elbow on her desk as he rested his cheek on his hand, his right arm thrown across his stomach as he slept. With the stretch of the material of his t-shirt over his upper right arm, she could see the bottom of the dressing covering the flesh wound he had from the bullet, obvious bruising on his arm too. Robyn walked over to him and crouched in front of him again and sighed. She wasn’t surprised to see him asleep, long eye lashes touching his red cheeks. It was then that Robyn realised that Taron must have walked from the bus or train stop to where she worked. It was about a twenty-five minute walk into the town and Robyn could only imagine the effort it took Taron to walk in the morning heat carrying his bag after travelling for so long, his injuries making the journey more difficult and tedious. It was no wonder he looked flushed.
“Did I hear you tell Valerie that he nearly died?” Asked Emma as she watched Robyn almost stare intensely at Taron as he sat in the black leather chair. Robyn took a glance her way before looking back to Taron. “I knew you were keeping somethings from me.”
“It’s just hard to talk about.”
“Anything to do with all the bruises on your hands? I have the same training you have Robyn.” Emma noticed how Robyn didn’t look back at her, but kept her eyes on her unexpected visitor. As Emma stood out in the hallway, she had heard some of the conversation between the two but moved quickly to the baby room when she realised the conversation was one she had no right to hear but Emma knew there was an almost desperate need for the two to spend some time together. She looked at the clock on the wall. It was nearly eleven thirty. She knew Robyn’s lunch break was in half an hour but with how quickly she had returned to work, Robyn was already ahead of her duties for the week. “Ok Robyn go on lunch.”
“What?”
“I want you go on your lunch break and I don’t want to see you back here until one thirty at the latest. Don’t argue with me. You have already worked five hours overtime this week and it is only Thursday. You are to go home with Taron and get him settled and then come back to work if you can. If this is something you need to take the day off for, I don’t mind. Just give me a call to let me know.”
“I won’t need to do that.” Said Robyn firmly. “I will be back.”
“Honestly Robyn, he looks just as exhausted you do but with him, I can’t tell if its bruising or tiredness. He has travelled a long way to come and see you for a reason and I believe it’s for the benefit for both of you and not just him. So, look, go home now and see how it goes. There is no pressure for you to come back to work today.”
“Ok.” Robyn didn’t have the energy to argue with her manager and with Taron in front of her, taking in his frayed appearance, it was easy to agree to an early lunch.
“Ok? Well that was easier than I expected. Normally I have to have a good old fight with you over these things.”
“I am learning to listen and take advice.”
“I like him.” Smiled Emma. “He’s good for you.”
Robyn laughed a little. “I like him too.”
A sleepy sigh left Taron’s lips and Robyn was quick to her kneel up straight to catch his head as he moved in his sleep, his elbow slipping off her desk, his head falling from his hand.
“Shh it’s ok.” Robyn found herself in a familiar position as Taron gasped a little with the pain he felt as he woke sitting up, her hands on his face as she knelt in-between his legs.
Emma walked past Robyn, giving her right shoulder a squeeze, providing her with some moral support and understanding before she opened the office door, walked out and closed it behind her.
“You are knackered Taron. Did you sleep on any of the three planes that you took to get here?” She asked him.
“You remember that part?” He asked through gritted teeth. He had automatically leaned his head on his hand on Robyn’s desk as he listened to her speaking out in the hallway, but with the fresh warm breeze blowing in the window it wasn’t long before he found himself drifting off from a combination of weariness, a full day of travel and knowledge that he had found an emotional refuge in Robyn. Her hands were on his face again and in the same way that when she held his hand, when she gently rubbed his cheeks, it was a gesture that just sent a wave of calmness through his whole body.
“Three planes?” She questioned again as Taron opened his eyes and shrugged his shoulders as Robyn took her hands from his warm face. “And no sleep?”
“I had the middle seat.”
“Enough said.” Robyn stood up and sat on the edge of her desk beside him. “It’s my lunch break. Let’s head back to my apartment and get you settled for some proper sleep. Remember we spoke about that cosy bed feeling?” Taron raised an eye brow. “I think it’s finally time.” She stood up and stretched past him to the shelf at the wall and grabbed her car keys, purse and phone. “Good to go?”
“Please.” Taron wasn’t able to put into the words how much he longed for a cosy bed and knowing he would finally get some sleep, because Robyn would ensure he would sleep, he was ready to go. He didn’t even question it. He completely trusted Robyn and was happy to go wherever she went.
“Don’t even think about lifting that bag.” Scolded Robyn once Taron wearily got to his feet and went to take his bag. “I will get that. I can see the pain on your face. It’s nowhere near as bad as before but your body is feeling after-effects of all that travel.”
“Robyn it’s a bag.”
“And if you collapse on the floor on me, I don’t have Richard to help me lift you so listen to me and let’s go.” Robyn picked up the straps of his duffle and lifted the bag.
“I really should know by now not to argue with you.”
“You come from a family of women Taron. You should know not to argue with a woman already.”
Taron opened the office door and Robyn secured it open with the door stop and she then hit the green button to release the main door and he followed her out into the sweltering heat of the day and walked across the small car park to Robyn’s silver Kia. She unlocked the car and threw Taron’s bag on the back seat before hoping in the driver’s seat, Taron easing himself into the passenger seat beside her, closing the car door and putting the seatbelt on.
“Let me get these windows down. This heat in here is insane.”
“Good music there Robyn.” Said Taron as Freddie Mercury’s voice reached his ears once Robyn had started the car and rolled the windows down.
“Can’t go wrong with Queen.” She laughed as she closed her door. “It’s literally a three-minute drive to where I live. It won’t take long.”
Taron couldn’t have cared if it was a three-hour drive. He felt safe, secure and ready to sleep.
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This nobody’s journal of hot, boring afternoons…
Day 21 (7.4.2020 - Tuesday)
I did not sleep through the night, again! What on Earth! On the other hand, I worked out, a little, but still a workout. As in I played with my dog. She got a hold my bro/sis old silambam belt and goes around playing with it. So grabbed on to the other end and had a tug of war with her, which was fun, until she realised I wasn’t much of a competition and got bored. :S It’s alright, I will prove to her that I am worthy of her time. I shall try again. Practice makes perfect Koko, you adorable snob!
Day 20 (6.4.2020 - Monday)
Omgoodness its day 20! I cannot believe we have been stuck at home without a choice for so long. I keep hearing of doctors and nurses falling ill, scientists working so hard to create a vaccine. I can’t help but wonder what this virus is all about. This thing we can’t see is causing so much chaos, panic and fear in everyone. And the way I see it, it’s not going away anytime soon. But our God is God over the impossible! He is the only way this virus will be washed out. This time at home, especially during this time leading up to Easter, has allowed me to spend some time in devotion and the Bible. And what I have learnt is we are not alone. Our time on Earth, though temporary, is designed to be fulfilling and beautiful. So I’m embracing that. No matter what comes against me, it shall not prosper. For my God is for me. On the other hand, I have not been able to sleep. It’s been challenging to
Day 19 (5.4.2020 - Sunday)
As usual, Sunday was enriching and chill. Not that every other day is not chill, but Sundays, they are quite a little more chill than other days. At 3pm, I joined a group chat with some friends from church. Fun.
Day 18 (4.4.2020 - Saturday)
After last week’s shopping debacle, I was terrified about going out there with mum again. Nevertheless, we had needs and they needed to be bought, so I got ready with my gear, the usual suspects of masks, gloves and a hand sanitiser. This time, the mall staff were even more strict. They checked body temperatures before anyone could even enter the building. And only one person per family was allowed in. So, yes, we kinda put on our inner Meryl Streeps and acted the strangers we never knew we could play so well. They believed it. Heck, at one point, even I believed it. My mom, I think, may BE, Meryl Streep, I don’t know. Anyway, no drama during shopping, everything was perfect. I even got to keep my shorts intact the whole time. No, it was a different shorts, I wash them everyday. Yes, I’ve got a whole lot of loose shorts okay? They’re comfy! What some more you want?
Day 17 (3.4.2020 - Friday)
Another Friday has come and gone. There is really nothing new happening, but today, I got to catch up with the darling! You don’t feel time passing you by until you actually do something you used to do very, very often, years ago. We used to Skype and video call all the time until work and life happened. Then suddenly, it had all come to an abrupt end. This conversation felt like such a treat. I felt like I was catching up with her entire lifetime. Well, a lot can happen in over six years. Feeling so blessed for technology and this time we get to reconnect and spend quality time with each other.
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Day 16 (2.4.2020)
Ok so, sleep lost it’s way and didn’t really get back to me, blardee heartbreaker! Didn’t do much other than write and hang around all day. So I decided, to pick up my guitar and do somethin with it. :) You Say by Lauren Daigle
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Day 15 (1.4.2020 - Wednesday)
I know it’s meant to be April’s Fool today, but like the rest of the world, it didn’t mean a thing. I mean, our situation right now seems like a giant prank anyway. There is no need to scare anyone else about, anything else. The greatest prank in the world right now would be to just go up to someone who’s NOT your family, and sneeze or cough right at their faces. Once they know you’re pranking em, they’d either laugh or slap you so hard, you begin to foretell your f-f-future. Even watching old YouTube videos of interviews or clips from shows where there is some amount of coughing or sneezing involved makes me cringe so hard! And I’m not the only one. Read the comments. Once thing I am certain of, whether a vaccine is found or not, is that once this MCO is over, everybody is gonna be a germaphobe/hygiene-junkies - always washing hands and sneezing into handkerchiefs and such. Anyway, goodnight, hope sleep finds me tonight.
Day 14 (31.3.2020 - Tuesday)
Oh praise the Lord I’m alright. At least, I think I’m alright. I don’t feel fuzzy, I have no fever, no headache. I was awake super early and I decided to feed my three dogs, for the first time! Let my bro and sis sleep in a little this morning. I had no idea how to do it. I just winged it based on what I thought is normally done, and it worked. The three ding dongs listened, sat patiently, ate sweetly and gave me some kisses. And then, I put on a fan for them, coz there was no air movement out. It was so weird, it was early morning and it was so hot with zero movement in the air. Man, we really need the rain!
Day 13 (30.3.2020 - Monday)
I am so not feeling good today! My mind is racing. Was it the shopping at Tesco on Saturday? Was it the Lontong flavoured Chef noodles I had for dinner last night? What is it? I have a bad headache, body ache and my brain is a little fuzzy, like when I have a fever. When I asked my sister to check my temperature, she confirmed there is a slight fever. Paracetamol. I need it. And a good shower. Had both. Going to sleep again. Maybe I’m tired, exhausted. I’ve told everyone in the house to stay away. Lord, protect papa. And heal me. Let this not be…it.
Day 12 (29.3.2020 - Sunday)
Time for church online. Mummy made friend mee hoon and some Portuguese tarts. It was one of those quiet days. Didn’t do much today.
Day 11 (28.3.2020 - Saturday)
Nope. Zoom didn’t let me down. I let Zoom down! My frickin alarm didn’t go off, or maybe it did and I didn’t hear it, I don’t know. All I know is I wasn’t up until 11.20am! The meeting was supposed to start at 11am! #muchembarassed Thankfully they were all in conversation while waiting for me. I didn’t even have time to brush my teeth. Just washed my face, tamed my hair and appeared online. Connect was awesome though. The two newcomers were great. Kinda weird we didn’t shake hands or hug, kinda weird we literally met face-to-face, online, but it was great! Cheers to new experiences, I say. Speaking of new experiences, I have never liked shopping. Like, ever. I don’t enjoy walking around, I don’t enjoy going to shops after shops after shops. Basically, I’m most men when it comes to shopping. Today, my mom and I had to run to Tesco to stock up on some of our essentials that are running low. I wore a shorts and t-shirt but with two masks, gloves, and in my pockets, Clorox anti-bacterial wipes and hand-sanitiser. We strategised how and what to touch before entering the store. I was going to be the one doing the touching, cos I wore the gloves, and my mom, wearing one glove, was to be the one pointing out what I was supposed to pick out from the shelves. Carefully, but swiftly, we began picking out everything on our list. My heart, for some reason, was drumming like a Taiko drum in my chest. And to make matters worse, sometime during our walking through the aisles, my mom completely ditched our strategy and started touching the things on the shelves! Like, ALL things! Okay, granted, I wasn’t fast enough for her but PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE, okay? Just… keep your hands to yourself and straighten ONLY the index finger. How difficult is that strategy? Now, she’d gone and made my mind spin round and round tryna think of how the virus would travel, or get stuck on her phone (which I sanitised the moment we got out), or what her gloved hand touched and what she could and could not touch anymore not that is has been exposed. Arghh! Finally at the cashier, we more or less got in sync. Everything went according to plan, like which hand she would get her debit card out of my shorts pocket with and which hand she received it from the cashier with after the payment was made. It went pretty perfectly, with the slight risk of me losing my shorts because mummy decided to shove her hands so far down my pockets. The shorts was loose to begin with. Thankfully, with my firm grip, nothing untoward happened. We got out, got home, showered and washed all the clothes we were in. All good. Phew…
Day 10 (27.3.2020 - Friday)
Thankful for technology. It’s made life very easy. Even my mom, who is completely resistant of anything “technology” (because she thinks she would destroy the internet or something) has had to organise Zoom meets, coordinate her kindergarten teachers’ online lessons and activities - it’s been quite a trip seeing my mom grow into this technological wiz, so to speak. I joined her connect group today, had a good discussion. A little nervous about mine tomorrow morning. We will have two newcomers on board. Hopefully Zoom doesn’t let me down.
Day 9 (26.3.2020 - Thursday)
It’s the end of the day, and lo and behold, I have completed the pages I was meant to complete. Turns out, I didn’t have to do some of the last pages, so that saved me some work. I was right. I DO feel blind and like a bat after completing the job, but the satisfaction of a job completed is unmatched. The number of cases keep increasing by around 130 every day! It’s not even funny how people are still choosing to ignore this situation. We are already in day nine of the MCO and they still feel it’s alright to meet their friends and family in such a time as this. If only we all, collaboratively, stayed home for two weeks, we could actually curb this virus from spreading out. STOP GIVING IT TRANSPORT! Ugh! On the bright side, I am organising our Connect meet online.
Day 8 (25.3.2020 - Wednesday)
Quick update: Still on the project. I have managed to complete around 10 pages, mostly profiles. I am so surprised at how weirdly written everything is. On COVID-19, we are 300 cases short of 2000. It’s not looking good at all. And what’s worse, the government has extended the MCO to April 14. So instead of going back to work on 1 April, I would be jobless until 15 April. Lord, I surrender this to you. Let all that happens, happen according to your plan. I place my trust and hope in You, Lord. Amen.
Day 7 (24.3.2020 - Tuesday)
…aaaaaaadddd!!!! There are sooo many words in this, it doesn’t seem to have an end! 105 pages of THIS is more than I can bear!!! I’m gonna go nuts by the end of it, or blind! Anyway, I started on this the day before yesterday, but it has been a lot of, what my dad would call, broken focus. I just can’t seem to stay on the editing bit. I keep getting beckoned by either YouTube or Facebook or Instagram, and end the day without completing even one full page… so here we are. I have exactly two days to complete editing 103 pages of words. *takes a deep breath* RM530 is riding on this, man! Get it together and do it! I know RM530 seems little, but to me, after 5 months of RM0, it’s an upgrade I never thought I’d get. #suckitup
Day 6 (23.3.2020 - Monday)
Monday has arrived. I am refreshed, I have my mind set on the epilepsy article I am gonna write and the copy-editing project from the marketing department. I’m all set. I sent my interview questions to both the people I am meant to talk to. Under the current situation, I am not able to talk to them so email is the next best thing. Except an interview over Zoom would have been better, but they can’t seem to make it. Being researchers and lecturers and all, they don’t have much time on their hands…. unlike me. Anyway, that’s done. Now, continuing the project. Ohhhhmaaaiiiigaaa…
Day 5 (22.3.2020 - Sunday)
Oh Sunday. It was a really awesome Sunday service. It was truly something I think we all needed. The praise and worship was amazing, and allowed me to just soak in worship. Despite all the chaos and fear that I have in my heart and mind, I felt a peace wash over me. Suddenly I realised that the only reason for the fear in my heart is the unknown. But every “next step” we take is an unknown anyway, so why fear this one? I will keep praying, staying home, except during essential buys, washing my hands, working and doing pretty much everything I always do WITHOUT having fear in my heart.
Day 4 (21.3.2020 - Saturday)
What a total frickin crap-show! The numbers are increasing and I’ll tell you the truth, I’m afraid. Every time I wash my hands, I can’t stop wondering if I’ve washed them enough. There is just too much stake. My dad, his lungs are really not good and I am worried about what would happen should one of us get careless and carry this virus home from some essential grocery shopping. The only comfort I have right now is that my God is bigger. I know my God is bigger than all of this. I know my God is bigger than all of this!
Day 3 (20.3.2020 - Friday)
I know I wished for an eventful 2020, but my goodness, enough already!
OMGIF already?? So, suddenly, the number of the infected in Malaysia hit 1000+. That is really too much! Who’s to blame? Why are there still cow dungs out and about on the roads, meeting friends and speaking their essentials words and letting their spits flow freely in the world and into each others’ ears? Don’t they know of a phone? There’s WhatsApp, Zoom, Hangout, Telegram, frickin Signal, Line, FB Messenger…heck, everything has a caller these days! *checks if Tinder has a caller* Not Tinder, thank goodness. Just…ugh…stop going out. *breathes* Meanwhile, my lovely brother gave us all his homemade Ais Malaysia and it was lovely! Like, it hasn’t properly rained in quite a few weeks now, and it is sooo hot. That Ais Malaysia was truly somewhat of a saving grace. And to top it off, my darling little sister made o-maki sushi, with the tuna and everything. Superb! Anyways, all things considered, the numbers locally are not too bad, is it? Is it? I’ll just have to keep washing my hands… “His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, there’s vomit on his sweater already, mom’s spaghetti…”
Day 2 (19.3.2020 - Thursday)
#tbt like #tbeverydayforthelast5months !
This MCO doesn’t really make much of a difference for me since I was not working the last five months. This time around though, I wash my hands more, go out lesser, and can’t go out even if I wanted to. You know what? The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Home Edition is super awesome! I love it. It’s a breath of fresh air so I’ll have that to enjoy over this period. When we get out of this, I don’t think my hands will make it out “alive”. The number of times I wash my hands to the first verse of “Lose Yourself” is nuts!
Day 1 (18.3.2020 - Wednesday)
So, I started this to keep track of what is happening in this lovely, wonderful, fantastic nation during the Movement Control Order and also to me, as a… non-essential employee. Coz as long as I’m not working, I am not paid. Ok, let me rephrase that. As long as I am not present AT the office, then I’m not paid. Never been in this position, kinda worrying, but thankfully, I do have projects to complete to get me some kinda cash. Don’t know how its all gonna pan out. I am leaving all these worries to the Lord Almighty coz I know there is nothing I can do to change anything happening around me other than pray and stay home. These daily entries will be filled with dramatics and descriptive nothings, coz seriously, I can’t imagine another two weeks at home. So I AM gonna add some spice to this. Alright, so, first day was…err…normal. How’s that for spice? Whaaaat? I don’t know what to say in this okay? I am just…I just wanna remember what I went thru so…
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hi 💓 could you do one where ben is a regular at this bookshop/coffee shop and he falls in love with this shy girl working there, and he asks her out eventually?
hi, sorry for the long wait! things have been intense lately and i’m not really feeling my best. but anyways! i’m a sucker for bookshop/coffee shop aus so this was really fun and cute to write. hope u like it!! (yeah, it’s ben pining again).
taglist: @luvborhap
*
It wasn’t hard to understand why Ben kept coming back.
The first time he noticed the little coffee-come-bookshop hidden just around the corner of Surrey and Whirling’s Street it was a cloudy tuesday morning and he was driving back home after a meeting with his agent. Not even a particularly exciting one. More of a “hey, you still haven’t got a call back from your last audition but try not to fret about it” kind of meeting; the type that shouldn’t bother him by now and yet still managed to make him feel quite shit. So naturally (and because for some reason it isn’t socially acceptable to get a bit tipsy at ten am), he postponed his original plan of speeding home to maybe hide under the covers for a while and decided to get for a cup of coffee instead.
Lotus’ Coffee, he thought later, was the kind of shop that you just couldn’t miss after you got your eye on it. The smell of freshly brewed coffee, its colourful walls and a strange abundance of plants made it tempting enough to get you on your feet and through the squeaky door. It looked exactly like the place to be whenever things got rough and heavy and you needed to rest your bones a little. (But that’s not what made it special).
That morning though, it appeared to be empty. Just him waiting in line on what seemed like a terribly slow day for everyone. Should’ve stayed in bed with Frankie, Ben thought, his eyes searching around for someone to take his order and landing on a small table, almost completely occupied by a box full of books, all of them carefully wrapped in brown paper and with a note handwritten in the back.
“It’s only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye”, he read, holding a book on his left hand and looking for more with the other, every quote more enchanting than the last and moving him so that he couldn’t help but stay there for a long time.
“Oh, I’m so sorry!”, a voice said quickly and out of nowhere, distracting him from his search and almost making him drop the box to the floor. “I-I really am, sorry. I’m- Mia is taking her break now and I just. Sorry. May I take your order, sir?”
Technically speaking, Ben knows that life isn’t a movie (regardless of how much he wants it to be sometimes). He knows about the logistics behind the camera, the angles and the lighting all working together in a perfectly organized harmony to make a scene between very tired people, that usually only talk to each other between takes, look like the epitome of good-selling romance. But, that being said, sometimes life comes pretty close or, like now, it’s even better.
The timid voice belonged to a woman that looked to be shaking a bit when, wrapping paper and scissors in hand, she made her way to the counter. Lovely, Ben thought, his hands rapidly getting sweaty while he looked at her try her best to hide the rosy colour that rose to her cheeks and spread until the neck of her shirt. Really really pretty, holy shit.
A cough brought his attention back to the menu, his eyes not really catching anything besides the girl standing behind the counter.
“Uhh, sorry. Yeah, what would you recommend?” Subtle. Years of acting school and a good job and that’s the best that he could come up with?
“Oh. Well, clients seem to like lattes lately? We got a new brew this week if you want- if you would like to try it?”
Ben doesn’t even like lattes. He’s more of a large black coffee with one sugar kind of guy because, in Joe’s words, he’s “bitter and soulless like that”. But there’s no way he could say no to this girl. It’s been five minutes and he feels himself stammer whenever he catches her eyes, his hands itching a little by his sides and definitely not because of the cold outside.
“We have banana bread too? With chocolate chips”
A woman after my own heart, fuck.
“Sure, that sounds perfect”, he replied, an actual full sentence this time, his chest feeling lighter when she gave him a smile before starting to work on his order; the book on his hand suddenly feeling like the most important thing in the world.
“So, was it your idea? The books and the wrapping, I mean. It’s lovely”
Her cheeks got red again and Ben felt like melting; following the movement of her hands and the tiny shine in her eyes like a sunflower would look at the sun.
“Yeah, I guess? We’re kind of slowly turning into a bookshop as well. I mean, I’m trying to convince everyone else still but it seems to be working, I think”, she giggled, now cutting a piece of bread and placing it in a plate on the table, besides his latte (a latte, Lucy would be so proud).
“So, an English major then?”, Ben chuckled, his smile growing impossibly larger when it made her laugh, raising her hands in surrender.
“Would you like to take one? The books in the box. Some of them are quite old but they’re incredible, I promise. Can’t go wrong with a book”.
Ben would have bought the whole box, honestly, but he chose two in the end: the one that caught his eye first and another, a lot heavier, that he noticed made her eyes sparkle so brightly that he knew he was onto something (and someone) very special. He had never met someone so breath-taking and astounding (and that was saying something considering his line of work or whatever); someone that seemed to hide a bit under the shadows and yet beamed light without even realizing it.
A latte had never tasted as sweet as when [Y/N] told him her name, and offered another piece of banana bread.
*
Safe to say, Ben started spending a lot more money on coffee and books after that, and he wasn’t very subtle if the looks that Mia, [Y/N]’s co-worker, and even Lily, the cat that made the shop her very own castle, gave him had anything to say in the matter. But he just couldn’t help himself. The first three weeks, when he was still in London, he stopped by as much as he could (basically every day she told him she would be there?) while trying his best to not come off as a creep; absolutely fascinated by the way she talked, sometimes stumbling on her feet when Lily walked between them and demanded to be pet immediately. And just like that, he caught himself being jealous of a cat and started reading so many books, sometimes well into the night, that he had to start using his prescription glasses a lot more frequently; only to feel like he could burst when he stopped by the shop the next morning and [Y/N] brightened up upon seeing him, knowing that they were possibly going to spend hours talking about his latest read and basically everything and anything that crossed their minds, all while the coffee brewed and Lily made herself a bed on their laps.
But he couldn’t muster up the courage to ask her out just yet. Not even when he had to leave for filming during a couple weeks and his list of books had to wait a little. But then again, how do you tell someone that they’re pretty much the only thing you can think about?
*
“He’s so obvious about it, you know”, Mia said, putting all the dirty cups and spoons on the dishwasher, completely exhausted after having to deal with all those people, using her best costumer voice, during rush hour.
“Who are you talking about now?”, [Y/N] asked, having just arrived and trying to eat lunch (a chicken sandwich with lettuce, very fancy, gourmet level and all that) as fast as she could so they could go over the inventory again.
“Ben, of course. He likes you a lot”.
Of course. As if there wasn’t any doubt, as if it was so incredibly obvious it should have it her like a brick in the face by now; as certain as the sky is blue and the grass is green.
“He does not, don’t be silly”, she replied. It was too good to be true after all, more like her deepest thoughts and longings but not so much like the truth, even if she wanted to believe it more than anything.
“Uh-uh, but he does though! He really does! I mean. I told you about yesterday. He’s been back in London for like, what, a day? And the first thing he did was come here. He reeked of airport, [Y/N]. When I told him you weren’t here because someone-”, Mia continued, pointing at Lily, currently purring on [Y/N]’s lap and trying to shove her tail under her nose, “just had to be a huge cockblock and go to the vet- Anyways. He looked so sad I thought he-”
“She needs routine check-ups, Mia!”, [Y/N] interrupted, “You know that. Don’t you, Lily darling?”. The cat in question continued to purr, glaring at Mia with a surprisingly menacing look.
“You’re deflecting. This little beast here could have waited just one more day and you know it! The only reason you didn’t let me take her in the first place is that you’re scared of what could happen because you know that lover boy is so crazy about-”
“Hi there! A hello would be nice, I think”. The door made a loud squeaky sound and let Ben in, his hair looking wet and looking way longer than the last time [Y/N] saw him, holding a bag in one hand and a bouquet of flowers in the other, looking like he was trembling a bit even though it was surprisingly sunny outside.
“And we’re taking our break now!”, Mia exclaimed, clapping in excitement and taking Lily from [Y/N]’s lap and into her own arms, much to the cat’s dismay, before rapidly walking into the back room.
She runs to hug him before she could even think about it, feeling truly warm and at home for the first time in weeks; the water droplets falling from his curls and into her neck.
“I-brought you something”, Ben said, hiding his face under her jaw for a second and then signalling to the presents still hanging uncomfortably in his hands, “Or well, two- various things, actually. I remember- you told me once, that morning that it was pouring outside, remember? I mean- it’s London, of course you do, it rains here all the time. But. That time when Lily was still outside, and it was raining so much you were scared she wasn’t going to come back? And she did, obviously, the little bugger. But- the point is that you told me you named her. And that you chose Lily because you couldn’t come up with anything else and you love lilies, right? Remember that?”. He left the flowers on the table, the bouquet looking fresh and just perfect by the box of wrapped books kept there. “So yeah, I got you these ones? They’re all the colours they had at the flower shop; I think. Anyways. I- that’s not my favourite part, actually. Just- look”
The bag, of course, was full of books; so old that their covers were almost crumbling and the pages, sewed together at some point, so delicate that just a rough touch could break them. “I- the old lady selling them was very nice. They’re really old, holy fuck, but listen. I know they’re some of your favourites. See, there’s a Madame Bovary somewhere in there and I know you love The Little Prince, so I found this french version… I guess, what I’m trying to say is that- I like you a lot, obviously, and I was wondering if you wanted to go out, maybe? But I got to be honest first, I-I don’t really like lattes that much?”
“These- these are some of the first editions, Ben”, he nodded, biting his lip in order to stop his smirk from growing when he noticed her getting closer and closer, her cheeks impossibly red by now, until their noses were almost touching, “ And I prefer tea, by the way”.
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3:38
TW: Death, Gore, mentions of getting stabbed.
Couple: Analogical
Prompt: Person B (Virgil) knowing they're going to die from blood lose thanks to the gaping wound they're bleeding from. They call Person A (Logan) and have a casual conversation, telling them they love them one last time, instead of calling for help.
~~~
To Virgil, there was something unGodly about the timeframe 2 to 4 am. There always had been, starting when he was a teenage who stayed up to late on Tumblr and Instagram, and, he assumed, their always would be. Now 26, Virgil had an valid reason to be up from 2 to 4 am: Plan B, the high end night club in the middle of the city, wasn't going to run itself, and Virgil would hardly let all his hard work be for nothing, regardless of how anxious he is. Sure, owning a Club wasn't a 'Picture Perfect' job, but if Virgil didn't do it, then who would?
Certainly not people like his husband, Logan, who was a College Professor. Not that Virgil minded his husbands Job, but it often made it a struggle to spend any time together. Virgil needed to be at Plan B on the weekends, when Logan was off, and Logan left for the day around the time Virgil got home. But they had a way of making it work. Logan didn't have classes on Monday, and Virgil never worked Wednesday's, somehow making their less than ideal schedules work perfectly.
Maybe that's why Virgil had been so eager to get home. It was 3:38am on a Monday morning. The sooner he got home and crawled into bed, the longer he'd get to cuddle with Logan. Virgil had been so eager, in fact, that he didn't hear the man walk up behind him.
He didn't hear him pull out the knife. He didn't see a face in the darkness. All he saw was the stars above him, and the empty parking lot in the back of the club. Plan B closed at 2, and Virgil had been the one to lock up today. The only car in the parking lot was his own.
He could feel the blood running out of his stomach onto the parking lot, and realized he probably wouldn't live. Instead he'd bleed out on the cold cement of his own property, behind his own club. No one would even find him until Joan or Roman came in tomorrow, which probably wouldn't be until 6 or 7.
Virgil fished for his phone, pulling it out of his pocket. 3:39 blinked up at him, the box letters somehow calming. It didn't take long to unlock the phone - the password being his and Logan's wedding date - and to get to contacts. What did seem to take forever, though, was waiting for Logan to pick up.
"G'mornin' love. When'll you b'home?" Logan asked, slurring his words together in his half asleep state. In the flat Virgil and him rented, he was laying the king sized bed, eyes closed, and barely awake enough to answer the phone. He wasn't necessarily concerned at the moment, Virgil called at 4 am all the time when he had to stay at club overnight to deal with paperwork and didn't want Logan to worry.
"I can't be home until tomorrow, Starlight. Probably not until tomorrow evening, or even Tuesday," Virgil said, trying to apply pressure to the stab wound in his stomach, knowing very well that it wasn't doing anything. Instead, he mainly focused on the stars he could see, unable to make out constellations due to the light pollution of the city.
"Should I be worried that you're cheating on me with Roman?" Logan asked, his voice sounding a little more awake, but not much. He was still tired, and slightly upset. Logan knew, rationally, the Club that Virgil owned and operated would take a lot of time, but staying their for 2 nights? That seemed a bit excessive.
"No, no, you're the only one for me Starlight. I just - uh, I just got super backed up on paperwork. I'm trying to set up a new Club in the next city over, and, uh," Virgil spoke rapidly, hating lying but thinking it was better than the truth. "I just got a stupid 'mounta paperwork to do."
"Are you lying to me?" Logan asked, jokingly, as he rolled out bed and made his way to the kitchen. Virgil had a of stuttering and rushing his words when lying, but he also did that when nervous or excited or tired, and was, generally, very straightforward.
"Never, Starlight. D'you remember our first date?" Virgil asked, catching his breathe at the end and hitting the mute button just in time for a coughing fit. He was now coughing up blood, how perfect.
"O'course I do, darling. You took me stargazing. We drove an hour and a half away from the city just so there wouldn't be any light pollution and we could name the constellations. We talked about the multidimensional theory and you sang Fall For You by Secondhand Serenade while we danced," Logan whispered breathlessly, remembering that day when he was barely 17 years old. He made his way to the kitchen, making a single cup of coffee using the Keurig.
Virgil clicked the unmute button, laughing breathlessly into the phone as he remembered the amount of panicking he'd done over that night. He'd swapped his usual Panic! At The Disco shirt for a blood red button-up, but kept the black ripped skinny jeans he still wore to this day, and converse.
"My favorite death theory is still the stars," Virgil said, grinning slightly in his weakened state as he counted the stars he could see. Logans laugh carried through the phone, making Virgil's body automatically relax.
"You always were found of that one, even though it's highly illogical."
"Do you remember, 3 years later, when I asked you to marry me?" Virgil asked, keeping his eyes open, on the twinkling stars. If he closed them he may never open them again, and dying without seeing Logan one last time was not something he wanted.
"Yes, I do," Logan said, taking a long sip of his coffee before closing his eyes as he leaned against the Island in their kitchen, reimagining that night. "We drove out to the same spot, but instead of staying on the little hill to stargaze we walked around the surrounding forest until it got dark. You managed to recreate the night of our first date perfectly. Same meal, same constellations, you were even in the same outfit. At the end of the dance, you asked me to marry you, and I couldn't help but say yes."
A small smile slipped onto both of their faces as they thought about that night, noth going silent for a few minutes. It had been magical in every sense of the word. They'd ended up falling asleep on the hill and driving back in to the small apartment they'd shared in the morning, planning on giving their family the news within the week.
"D'you remember the little cabin?" Virgil asked, his voice slowly getting weaker. He could taste the blood on his teeth, which was making him sick, and it was getting harder to hold the phone to his ear ad he spoke.
"Of course," Logan said, the memory of the Log Cabin in the woods and the idea of spending a summer there coming back to him. "There was a little walking path to a long cabin with a wrap around porch. The cabin seemed in perfect condition other than the fact that there wasn't anyone there. I'd love to go and stay there. Investigate the forest of the surrounding area and watch the stars every night."
"You're birthday's next week, Starlight. We're going to spend a week in that cabin. I already cleared it with you're boss. The key to the cabin is hiding in the glovebox of my car right now," Virgil slurred his words together, the stars losing their dimness as the pain began to take over. Logan rolled his eyes at Virgs confession, the boy never could keep secrets, even for the sake of someone's birthday. "I've gotta go now, love. I'll be home tomorrow, Logan, I'll be home tomorrow."
"I love you, Virgil, don't overwork yourself," Logan said softly, finishing his cup of coffee and putting the mug into the sink.
"And I love you, Logan. More than the moon and sun and all the stars. You're my Starlight."
Logan smiled at the slurred words, assuming his husband was exhausted from a long day. In Logans mind, Virgil would fall asleep on the couch in his office, forgetting to charge his phone. He'd probably wake up, make a cup of coffee, forget to eat, and get started right away on paperwork, not even thinking to charge his phone until his lunch break, which would last 20 minutes at most. He'd come home around 6ish, complaining about office work, and would try, and fail, to sneakily wrap his arms around Logan while he was cooking dinner. With those thoughts in mind, Logan hung up and made his way back to bed, curling up in the warm covers and falling peacefully asleep.
Virgil pulled the phone away from his ear, barely making out a blurry '4:16 am' before his world went black. He smiled slightly, Logans voice in his head repeatedly saying 'I love you, Virgil'.
~~~
One titled 4:16 about Logan finding out about it and grieving? Maybe.
#analogical#character death#virgil#virgilsanders#Logan#logan sanders#virgil sanders#logic#anxiety#night clubs#sanders sides virgil#sanders sides#virgil anxiety#logan x virgil#virgil x logan#ts logan#ts virgil#ts roman#ts#roman mention#joan#joan mention#thomas sanders#text post#txt#writing wip#new wip#i asked my friend how long itd take for someone to bleed out because of this#at 11pm
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