saymypiece

[saymypiece]

This nobody’s journal of hot, boring afternoons…

Day 21 (7.4.2020 - Tuesday)

I did not sleep through the night, again! What on Earth! On the other hand, I worked out, a little, but still a workout. As in I played with my dog. She got a hold my bro/sis old silambam belt and goes around playing with it. So grabbed on to the other end and had a tug of war with her, which was fun, until she realised I wasn’t much of a competition and got bored. :S It’s alright, I will prove to her that I am worthy of her time. I shall try again. Practice makes perfect Koko, you adorable snob! 

Day 20 (6.4.2020 - Monday)

Omgoodness its day 20! I cannot believe we have been stuck at home without a choice for so long. I keep hearing of doctors and nurses falling ill, scientists working so hard to create a vaccine. I can’t help but wonder what this virus is all about. This thing we can’t see is causing so much chaos, panic and fear in everyone. And the way I see it, it’s not going away anytime soon. But our God is God over the impossible! He is the only way this virus will be washed out. This time at home, especially during this time leading up to Easter, has allowed me to spend some time in devotion and the Bible. And what I have learnt is we are not alone. Our time on Earth, though temporary, is designed to be fulfilling and beautiful. So I’m embracing that. No matter what comes against me, it shall not prosper. For my God is for me. On the other hand, I have not been able to sleep. It’s been challenging to 

Day 19 (5.4.2020 - Sunday)

As usual, Sunday was enriching and chill. Not that every other day is not chill, but Sundays, they are quite a little more chill than other days. At 3pm, I joined a group chat with some friends from church. Fun.

Day 18 (4.4.2020 - Saturday)

After last week’s shopping debacle, I was terrified about going out there with mum again. Nevertheless, we had needs and they needed to be bought, so I got ready with my gear, the usual suspects of masks, gloves and a hand sanitiser. This time, the mall staff were even more strict. They checked body temperatures before anyone could even enter the building. And only one person per family was allowed in. So, yes, we kinda put on our inner Meryl Streeps and acted the strangers we never knew we could play so well. They believed it. Heck, at one point, even I believed it. My mom, I think, may BE, Meryl Streep, I don’t know. Anyway, no drama during shopping, everything was perfect. I even got to keep my shorts intact the whole time. No, it was a different shorts, I wash them everyday. Yes, I’ve got a whole lot of loose shorts okay? They’re comfy! What some more you want?

Day 17 (3.4.2020 - Friday)

Another Friday has come and gone. There is really nothing new happening, but today, I got to catch up with the darling! You don’t feel time passing you by until you actually do something you used to do very, very often, years ago. We used to Skype and video call all the time until work and life happened. Then suddenly, it had all come to an abrupt end. This conversation felt like such a treat. I felt like I was catching up with her entire lifetime. Well, a lot can happen in over six years. Feeling so blessed for technology and this time we get to reconnect and spend quality time with each other. 

Day 16 (2.4.2020)

Ok so, sleep lost it’s way and didn’t really get back to me, blardee heartbreaker! Didn’t do much other than write and hang around all day. So I decided, to pick up my guitar and do somethin with it. :) You Say by Lauren Daigle

Day 15 (1.4.2020 - Wednesday)

I know it’s meant to be April’s Fool today, but like the rest of the world, it didn’t mean a thing. I mean, our situation right now seems like a giant prank anyway. There is no need to scare anyone else about, anything else. The greatest prank in the world right now would be to just go up to someone who’s NOT your family, and sneeze or cough right at their faces. Once they know you’re pranking em, they’d either laugh or slap you so hard, you begin to foretell your f-f-future. Even watching old YouTube videos of interviews or clips from shows where there is some amount of coughing or sneezing involved makes me cringe so hard! And I’m not the only one. Read the comments. Once thing I am certain of, whether a vaccine is found or not, is that once this MCO is over, everybody is gonna be a germaphobe/hygiene-junkies - always washing hands and sneezing into handkerchiefs and such. Anyway, goodnight, hope sleep finds me tonight.

Day 14 (31.3.2020 - Tuesday)

Oh praise the Lord I’m alright. At least, I think I’m alright. I don’t feel fuzzy, I have no fever, no headache. I was awake super early and I decided to feed my three dogs, for the first time! Let my bro and sis sleep in a little this morning. I had no idea how to do it. I just winged it based on what I thought is normally done, and it worked. The three ding dongs listened, sat patiently, ate sweetly and gave me some kisses. And then, I put on a fan for them, coz there was no air movement out. It was so weird, it was early morning and it was so hot with zero movement in the air. Man, we really need the rain!

Day 13 (30.3.2020 - Monday)

I am so not feeling good today! My mind is racing. Was it the shopping at Tesco on Saturday? Was it the Lontong flavoured Chef noodles I had for dinner last night? What is it? I have a bad headache, body ache and my brain is a little fuzzy, like when I have a fever. When I asked my sister to check my temperature, she confirmed there is a slight fever. Paracetamol. I need it. And a good shower. Had both. Going to sleep again. Maybe I’m tired, exhausted. I’ve told everyone in the house to stay away. Lord, protect papa. And heal me. Let this not be…it.

Day 12 (29.3.2020 - Sunday)

Time for church online. Mummy made friend mee hoon and some Portuguese tarts. It was one of those quiet days. Didn’t do much today.

Day 11 (28.3.2020 - Saturday)

Nope. Zoom didn’t let me down. I let Zoom down! My frickin alarm didn’t go off, or maybe it did and I didn’t hear it, I don’t know. All I know is I wasn’t up until 11.20am! The meeting was supposed to start at 11am! #muchembarassed Thankfully they were all in conversation while waiting for me. I didn’t even have time to brush my teeth. Just washed my face, tamed my hair and appeared online. Connect was awesome though. The two newcomers were great. Kinda weird we didn’t shake hands or hug, kinda weird we literally met face-to-face, online, but it was great! Cheers to new experiences, I say. Speaking of new experiences, I have never liked shopping. Like, ever. I don’t enjoy walking around, I don’t enjoy going to shops after shops after shops. Basically, I’m most men when it comes to shopping. Today, my mom and I had to run to Tesco to stock up on some of our essentials that are running low. I wore a shorts and t-shirt but with two masks, gloves, and in my pockets, Clorox anti-bacterial wipes and hand-sanitiser. We strategised how and what to touch before entering the store. I was going to be the one doing the touching, cos I wore the gloves, and my mom, wearing one glove, was to be the one pointing out what I was supposed to pick out from the shelves. Carefully, but swiftly, we began picking out everything on our list. My heart, for some reason, was drumming like a Taiko drum in my chest. And to make matters worse, sometime during our walking through the aisles, my mom completely ditched our strategy and started touching the things on the shelves! Like, ALL things! Okay, granted, I wasn’t fast enough for her but PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE, okay? Just… keep your hands to yourself and straighten ONLY the index finger. How difficult is that strategy? Now, she’d gone and made my mind spin round and round tryna think of how the virus would travel, or get stuck on her phone (which I sanitised the moment we got out), or what her gloved hand touched and what she could and could not touch anymore not that is has been exposed. Arghh! Finally at the cashier, we more or less got in sync. Everything went according to plan, like which hand she would get her debit card out of my shorts pocket with and which hand she received it from the cashier with after the payment was made. It went pretty perfectly, with the slight risk of me losing my shorts because mummy decided to shove her hands so far down my pockets. The shorts was loose to begin with. Thankfully, with my firm grip, nothing untoward happened. We got out, got home, showered and washed all the clothes we were in. All good. Phew…

Day 10 (27.3.2020 - Friday)

Thankful for technology. It’s made life very easy. Even my mom, who is completely resistant of anything “technology” (because she thinks she would destroy the internet or something) has had to organise Zoom meets, coordinate her kindergarten teachers’ online lessons and activities - it’s been quite a trip seeing my mom grow into this technological wiz, so to speak. I joined her connect group today, had a good discussion. A little nervous about mine tomorrow morning. We will have two newcomers on board. Hopefully Zoom doesn’t let me down.

Day 9 (26.3.2020 - Thursday)

It’s the end of the day, and lo and behold, I have completed the pages I was meant to complete. Turns out, I didn’t have to do some of the last pages, so that saved me some work. I was right. I DO feel blind and like a bat after completing the job, but the satisfaction of a job completed is unmatched. The number of cases keep increasing by around 130 every day! It’s not even funny how people are still choosing to ignore this situation. We are already in day nine of the MCO and they still feel it’s alright to meet their friends and family in such a time as this. If only we all, collaboratively, stayed home for two weeks, we could actually curb this virus from spreading out. STOP GIVING IT TRANSPORT! Ugh! On the bright side, I am organising our Connect meet online.

Day 8 (25.3.2020 - Wednesday)

Quick update: Still on the project. I have managed to complete around 10 pages, mostly profiles. I am so surprised at how weirdly written everything is. On COVID-19, we are 300 cases short of 2000. It’s not looking good at all. And what’s worse, the government has extended the MCO to April 14. So instead of going back to work on 1 April, I would be jobless until 15 April. Lord, I surrender this to you. Let all that happens, happen according to your plan. I place my trust and hope in You, Lord. Amen.

Day 7 (24.3.2020 - Tuesday)

…aaaaaaadddd!!!! There are sooo many words in this, it doesn’t seem to have an end! 105 pages of THIS is more than I can bear!!! I’m gonna go nuts by the end of it, or blind! Anyway, I started on this the day before yesterday, but it has been a lot of, what my dad would call, broken focus. I just can’t seem to stay on the editing bit. I keep getting beckoned by either YouTube or Facebook or Instagram, and end the day without completing even one full page… so here we are. I have exactly two days to complete editing 103 pages of words. *takes a deep breath* RM530 is riding on this, man! Get it together and do it! I know RM530 seems little, but to me, after 5 months of RM0, it’s an upgrade I never thought I’d get. #suckitup

Day 6 (23.3.2020 - Monday)

Monday has arrived. I am refreshed, I have my mind set on the epilepsy article I am gonna write and the copy-editing project from the marketing department. I’m all set. I sent my interview questions to both the people I am meant to talk to. Under the current situation, I am not able to talk to them so email is the next best thing. Except an interview over Zoom would have been better, but they can’t seem to make it. Being researchers and lecturers and all, they don’t have much time on their hands…. unlike me. Anyway, that’s done. Now, continuing the project. Ohhhhmaaaiiiigaaa…

Day 5 (22.3.2020 - Sunday)

Oh Sunday. It was a really awesome Sunday service. It was truly something I think we all needed. The praise and worship was amazing, and allowed me to just soak in worship. Despite all the chaos and fear that I have in my heart and mind, I felt a peace wash over me. Suddenly I realised that the only reason for the fear in my heart is the unknown. But every “next step” we take is an unknown anyway, so why fear this one? I will keep praying, staying home, except during essential buys, washing my hands, working and doing pretty much everything I always do WITHOUT having fear in my heart.

Day 4 (21.3.2020 - Saturday)

What a total frickin crap-show! The numbers are increasing and I’ll tell you the truth, I’m afraid. Every time I wash my hands, I can’t stop wondering if I’ve washed them enough. There is just too much stake. My dad, his lungs are really not good and I am worried about what would happen should one of us get careless and carry this virus home from some essential grocery shopping. The only comfort I have right now is that my God is bigger. I know my God is bigger than all of this. I know my God is bigger than all of this!

Day 3 (20.3.2020 - Friday)

I know I wished for an eventful 2020, but my goodness, enough already! 

OMGIF already?? So, suddenly, the number of the infected in Malaysia hit 1000+. That is really too much! Who’s to blame? Why are there still cow dungs out and about on the roads, meeting friends and speaking their essentials words and letting their spits flow freely in the world and into each others’ ears? Don’t they know of a phone? There’s WhatsApp, Zoom, Hangout, Telegram, frickin Signal, Line, FB Messenger…heck, everything has a caller these days! *checks if Tinder has a caller* Not Tinder, thank goodness. Just…ugh…stop going out. *breathes* Meanwhile, my lovely brother gave us all his homemade Ais Malaysia and it was lovely! Like, it hasn’t properly rained in quite a few weeks now, and it is sooo hot. That Ais Malaysia was truly somewhat of a saving grace. And to top it off, my darling little sister made o-maki sushi, with the tuna and everything. Superb! Anyways, all things considered, the numbers locally are not too bad, is it? Is it? I’ll just have to keep washing my hands… “His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, there’s vomit on his sweater already, mom’s spaghetti…”

Day 2 (19.3.2020 - Thursday)

#tbt like #tbeverydayforthelast5months ! 

This MCO doesn’t really make much of a difference for me since I was not working the last five months. This time around though, I wash my hands more, go out lesser, and can’t go out even if I wanted to. You know what? The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Home Edition is super awesome! I love it. It’s a breath of fresh air so I’ll have that to enjoy over this period. When we get out of this, I don’t think my hands will make it out “alive”. The number of times I wash my hands to the first verse of “Lose Yourself” is nuts!

Day 1 (18.3.2020 - Wednesday)

So, I started this to keep track of what is happening in this lovely, wonderful, fantastic nation during the Movement Control Order and also to me, as a… non-essential employee. Coz as long as I’m not working, I am not paid. Ok, let me rephrase that. As long as I am not present AT the office, then I’m not paid. Never been in this position, kinda worrying, but thankfully, I do have projects to complete to get me some kinda cash. Don’t know how its all gonna pan out. I am leaving all these worries to the Lord Almighty coz I know there is nothing I can do to change anything happening around me other than pray and stay home. These daily entries will be filled with dramatics and descriptive nothings, coz seriously, I can’t imagine another two weeks at home. So I AM gonna add some spice to this. Alright, so, first day was…err…normal. How’s that for spice? Whaaaat? I don’t know what to say in this okay? I am just…I just wanna remember what I went thru so…

[saymypiece]

This was for fun. Sorry about the mistake at the end. Heheh!

Vandhaai Ayya - English cover Bahubali 2: The Conclusion

[saymypiece]

Bahubali 2 - Oh my goodness!

I had to literally wait until my crazy obsession had died down, at least a little. I HAD to write something about this movie because it was just.....really.....GOOD! And I don’t want to make this long and boring so, I’m sorry, this IS going to be loooooonnnnngggg but hopefuly not boring!

Back in 2015, I heard about a Tamil movie - Bahubali - being released, and being someone who does not watch many Indian movies (mostly because of their length), I wasn’t too interested. My good friend had sent me the Siva Sivaya Potri song, commenting on how good the actor’s body looked and telling me that the movie was a MUST WATCH. So as expected, I did NOT go and watch the movie because, one, I don’t really like period movies (unless it is Lord of the Rings) and two, I knew I was going to have to be in the cinema hall for three hours! THREE! And above all of that, I couldn’t recognise any of the actors in the clip. Who is this Prabhas and Rana Daggubati. I knew Anushka and Tamannaah from some movies I did not really enjoy. So, yea, no Bahubali for me. 

But before too long, EVERYONE was talking about it. But still, I couldn’t find the time to go for it, had to work longer hours, had to heat up dinner, the cat needed some milk, etc - all great and effective excuses.

Fast-forward to this year, more specifically 30 April 2017. Two of my friends and I attended a friend’s wedding. It was after that that I suggested we go for a movie, having a popular galaxy superhero movie in mind. So when they both agreed, I was excited to go see Star Lord and Baby Groot in action, but instead, they convinced me to see Bahubali 2.

Having not watched the first movie and being not so interested, I quickly browsed through the plot of Bahubali: The Beginning on Wikipedia. (Yes, I cheated, can I move on?) And stepped into the cinema hall. From the moment the title song played, I was lost, until the end of the movie. I laughed, cried, got mad angry and fell so in love with Amarendra Baahubali, it’s not even funny!

From the graphics to the acting of EVERY cast member, it was superb! Each actor owned their character so well. I mean, that’s almost impossible, isn’t it? Look, I am speechless right now, I really don’t know how to describe how amazing their work was! I believe the reason this movie has reached the heights it did is because of the entire team that worked on it. From the director, producers, designers, composers, actors, etc, everyone were somehow on the same page and gelled well. The result was this mind-boggling hit all over the world. The movie had inspired so many new reaction videos by those in Western countries! YouTube channels were being created JUST to react to Indian movies and songs! I don’t think they even knew about the Indian movie industry before that. And it was all so awesome!

I personally have only ever been exposed to Hindi and Tamil movies - never even realised what Telugu sounded like although I knew the language existed. I’m so glad I do now, because I love it! It’s so....sexy. So yes, I’m learning the language. Also, I now know who Ram Charan, Allu Arjun and Mahesh Babu are.

Actually the rest of what I would like to talk about has nothing to do with the movie but I have a confession to make. I am in love with Prabhas. I know, it’s ridiculous and cliche and whatever, but he has become my benchmark for the men I get to know or want to date. His height, eyes, smile and fingers have become what I look for in men. Dang it, Prabhas, you’ve made it EVEN more difficult for me to find a suitable man who I will actually like.

Tell me he is not sexy! Just say it and I will show you a liar! 

Anyway, I had to do this, I just had to...it’s just too much to contain and I have no clue as to when it is going to die down. It should have! It’s been two months! But no! That’s all for now...be back again soon, I know it. This obsession don’t seem like it is going anywhere anytime soon! 

[saymypiece]

Omgoodness!!!!! #inlove #bahubali2 #ssrajamouli #geniusdirector #perfectcasting

[saymypiece]

It’s always me

It’s me, it’s me, it’s always me

Guess who started that fight again (it’s me)

Now who left that painting out in the rain (it’s me)

Stop throwing tantrums, stop showing your temper

Stop making it as though this is more than a friendly banter

JUST STOP!

It’s me, it’s me, it’s always me

It’s always going to be my fault and nobody’s

Why did he not call back, why did he have to leave

The answer is glaring, no more questions about it

Don’t need the “investigate all the signs laying around” bit

No more.

It’s me, it’s me, no matter how much evidence I have, it is still me

You see me for who I hang around with and what I have done

Don’t nobody know me, the real me, not just the side of fun

The me who loves to read and sing and loves to take photos

The me who prefers going for movies all on my own.

The me desperate not to hurt or be hurt or incite hurt to anyone.

Coz that’s me, that’s me, that’s always been me

I can shout it from the rooftop, it still wouldn’t be loud enough

See me, see me, please don’t judge me

Underneath this exterior I’m actually not that tough

I’m me, I’m me, I guess I’m always going to be me

I’m me, I’m me, and me don’t got to please nobody but me.

[saymypiece]

Heartbreaks galore

It's true what they say! Time really does heal the worst break-ups, or well, in my case(s), half-break ups. This was a post written over a year ago but I thought it was a good one so though there are many changes I have had to make in terms of time (e.g. weeks to months, etc), the gist of the tale is still solely focused on how my precious time and energy, and creative efforts was generously spent on trying to make relationships work...

And by this post I don't intend to discourage all you passionate, lovestruck, romantics out there who are currently enjoying every minute of your honeymoon phase where its all fun and cuddles, and cute teasing, nibbling and tickling. I'm here to talk about when all the lovey-dovey'ness comes to an end, reality hits and how as women, we have to be prepared for it, the END. 

I'm not saying that we should think about being prepared for those situations. I'm saying we NEED to be prepared!

Okay, you have to be patient with me. This started when I was in high school. Get the point? I'll make it brief. Let's go! 1997 This was two years into high school and I'd made friends with a bunch of kids and by now, we were good friends, being the socially impaired girl I was. I was proud of myself. Of them was a guy, a guy who I constantly fought with and hated and whom EVERYONE teased me with. Naturally, he became the love of my life. We dated. I thought he was my future husband. Period. One year in, I lost all emotions, love....all feelings were gone and I didn't have the slightest clue as to why. We remained friends, we somehow still loved each other though we were seeing other people. He was my first love for crying out loud! Fast-forward 13 years... 2010 FirstLove and I patched up after a fallout few years ago and were now doing the whole online thing. We dated online, we spoke online. We were so comfortable with each other online and every time we met, it would be fireworks! It was splendid, him and me together. But we weren't putting labels. I loved him and he loved me back but I mean, both of us weren't fully ready for a full-on relationship, so we chilled. A year and a half into this, non-relationship thing we had going on, things started to change. I only ask for communication. Why is that so damn difficult? Its not like we're married, why get tired of it? The question I didn't ask myself was, why he DID get tired of it. The whole UGLY truth of the matter is, I loved him more than he ever did me. He probably cared but when he saw that I was going no where, that my allegiance was to him and ONLY him, even without a concrete status, I was sold. 

He could do whatever he wanted and still have me eating out the palm of his hand, begging him for attention and giving him ALL the attention he needed.

Thank goodness FirstLove wasn't cheating on me or anything. I knew that for a fact however, it wasn't like he wanted me either. He just kept stalling by saying things like, "Babe, things will eventually pan out but not right now, k?" I wanted to scream!! K???? Frickin K??????? Dude its not like I am asking for a relationship and a proposal man!!! Just be the same person you were the past year! Ok. That was case study #1 Bored yet? Well, if not, here is #2. 2013 The year of possibilities. Erm...well, at least I liked seeing it that way. Little did I know I was bound aboard The Heartbreak Express. I got to know the guy, we got chummy, and well, eventually, things took a turn for the not-so-nice side. See, there were three of us. And yes, it involved a best friend, of mine. To make the dang long story short, history repeated, but slightly differently. Texts reduced over time, calls almost came to a stop. Eye-flirting (yes, it exists!) was non-existent. Things just...........changed. You know what I noticed though, him and my friend had gotten, closer. Yea. They both, especially my then best friend, claimed it was a bro, sis relationship. Bro-sis, my ass! There are things you don't say or do in front of, or to your brother, or sister, alright?! But I sat through it all not willing to acknowledge the INCEST that was happening right in front of my eyes. Yep, I'm sick like that! I'd rather sit through a whole lotta sick than spit it in the face and flee the opposite direction. I rather get my heart broken into a million pieces, and then offer my painfully stitched back heart again to be stepped on, crushed, torn apart and totally ruined, than be bold and say "I'm not putting up with your sheesh no more!" Though it pained me everyday when I saw how they both were so close and how it just felt like they included me in the loop out of, what seemed to be pity, I just let them. There was a last straw of course. Thank goodness! I caught them in a lie. Not cheating, but a lie. And then out of no where, all the unnecessary dung I've been through with them and put up with, and ever so dumbly tried to brush aside decided to present themselves ever so politely to me. I started seeing the ugly, UGLY truth I have have been so adamantly shutting out. It hurt so bad when things started to make sense. An immense gush of suspicion arose, LOL. Yea, well, that's the side-effect of losing trust. 

Things were clear as day though. Everything they said, uttered out of their lying mouths couldn't change the fact that I'd already seen them in their true form.

It wasn't easy, let me tell you that. And the fact that I had great support from two of my awesomest friends helped me pull through it. The mending was the toughest but time, as I said earlier, healed the wounds. They are mere scars now. The pain is no longer. I never thought I would actually be able to say that. But it was a tough, tough process to get here so, why put ourselves through all that? In conclusion (everybody say 'thank heavens!'), I come back to my initial point. Ever heard of the saying that goes, "Prevention is better than cure"? As cliche as it sounds, digest it, and WORK IT! KEEP YOUR HEART GUARDED! Under all circumstances. Ok, wow! This was a long one. I deserve a holiday, don't you think. Toodles!

[saymypiece]

The tale of a hungry boy

Ok, so…ehem…

There once lived a little boy who was always hungry, everyday and every time (redundant, I know…just bear with me).  No matter what he ate, he remained hungry. 

He was hungry when going to school, when playing football, when watching TV, Heck he was even hungry when he had just finished a meal. Everyone knew him as Hungry Boy because, yes exactly, he was always hungry. 

One day, there was a party in school and each student was to bring a dish to contribute to the makan-time. Hungry Boy had been assigned to bring jelly. 

On the day, he had been late to class and by the time he got to class with the jelly, the food had already been laid out by his classmates, saving some space for the jelly, of course, and the class was empty because everyone had gone out for the assembly (perhimpunan). 

Now, nobody knows what happened in that classroom that day (and there certainly was no CCTV footage to use as evidence) but when the students returned to the class after the assembly, all the food was gone! 

They were in shock and disappointment, and after lots of arguments, they started blaming Hungry Boy. 

“He wasn’t even here when we left for the assembly,” said one student. 

“Yes, and the jelly is here, which means he came AFTER we left,” said another. 

“And he loves to eat,” chimed in another. 

After much debate, the teacher asked him if he ate the food. He got upset and started accusing his classmates of having ill intentions against him. 

Finally the teacher, wanting to solve this entire fiasco, told him to empty his pockets. 

Instead of doing so, however, he told the teacher that he will only empty his pockets if his classmates, and the teacher, emptied theirs too. 

To be continued….

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[saymypiece]

A Backstreet Experience

*JUMPS UP AND DOWN AND DANCES AROUND THE ROOM*

AAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*while breathing heavily from all the jumping and dancing* I am absolutely thrilled and excited to go on and on and on about this experience. Though it has been more than a week, it remains fresh and clear in my mind. So I decided to let it out!

But let me first give you a little background tale...please bear with me...

I was 10 when I first heard a song, not sure now if it was “Everybody”, “Get down” or “We’ve got it goin’ on”, but two years later (at 12-years old) my cousin came home with a pirated copy of some random album titled “Backstreet’s Back”.

Let me tell you this, within a week, that random album had taught me what love is. Of course the love I mean is the moment I fell in love with the Backstreet Boys.

ALL FIVE OF EM!

The Boys (with a capital B) have been the love of my life, even from that tender age of 12. I know I can’t be the only one, but I’d like to think that to a certain extent, it was only ME who felt it, like I knew them, like…they would have been my friends if we met.

At an internet-less age, I had already found out so much about them. And my love for them and their music only grew more the older I got.

On May 3, 2015, the day of Backstreet Boys’ “In a world like this” concert in Malaysia, my friend and I had just toured the backstage and helped out with food and beverages for the VIP and VVIP rooms before we were hurriedly called down to the catering/artists’ dressing room area. We were then informed,

  “THEY will be here in 15 minutes”.

Waiting at the dining area (with my underarms sweating from being anxious with anticipation...thank goodness I was in black), watching, through a tinted glass wall, when their big, black SUV’s pulled up outside, my just heart wouldn’t stop crashing into my ribs!

A few seconds later, AJ and Kevin strolled in like it was the most normal thing in the world to do, next to tug at all my heartstrings were Nick and Brian and finally (around 10 minutes later) Howie arrived.

It would be an understatement to say that I was overwhelmed….no no no...I was MINDBLOWN!

I could feel the little cells in my brain exploding with excitement! It was my childhood dream-come-TRUE. And I was becoming that 12-year-old girl again!

I had been forewarned to NOT freak out or scream or show even a tinge of, well, eagerness. In short, they said “be a fly on the wall, Kristene.”

I did not disappoint, of course. I mean, that would mean to risk being thrown out of the stadium altogether, and I really couldn’t have that happen, could I?

After all, we did trade in those Cat 5 tickets my friend got, for CREW passes. Oh wait, maybe you’re not supposed to know that part. Oh well, basically, my friend had granted me an opportunity, a one-time offer that I really couldn’t afford to cock up! So a fly on the wall, I would gladly be.

The thing is, I tried to get tickets to the concert two months before May 3, but they were all sold out.

You can imagine my disappointment. I even went to the extent of considering looking for tickets in the black, but well, my black-market connections are null so, that wasn’t happening. I probably had to approach some high end Backstreet gangsters if I wanted them and ‘Gangster Lorong Belakang’ has quite a scary ring to it, so, mudah.my it was. Yet, NOTHING!

Two days before the concert, May 1, Labour’s Day, I was in despair. I knew that it would take a miracle, the parting of the Red Sea kind, to get me them tickets.

I had done the math. I am 29 this year (yes, I was talking about my age), and the Backstreet Boys, they are around 40. Chances of them touring again, even more so, coming to Malaysia, are very slim! Touring at 60? I didn’t think so (though I would love it). So this was the ONLY opportunity I had to at least lay eyes on them, even if they were a speck from afar.

Look at me! Given a chance, I think my mouth, or in this case fingers, wouldn’t shut up!

But in all seriousness, though I could barely contain myself being right there, in their midst, with them walking casually about, doing normal-people, non-stagy things, being comfortable and silly…I had no intention of jumping them or breaking that boundary. AT ALL!

It was quite a sight watching them out of their Backstreet-Boy element, really.

I watched as AJ slapped one of the bodyguards (who I’m guessing is his) on the back and started telling him some story (I’m guessing again is about a bunch of crazy fangirls….uh-oh!), then going and enjoying some baseball video game, and seeing Howie order his food, taste and comment on how good it was to other bodyguards and crew members. And Brian, *swoons* rehearsing while being all silly and goofy with the others. It was all so unreal. And it was happening right in front of me.

My goodness, I sound like a psycho-stalker, watching their every move like that. But come on, what my eyes recorded was ALL I had to hold on to. I was RIGHT there and I had no other memento! I wasn’t allowed to ask for an autograph and I really didn’t want to sneak-snap a picture of them or secretly record them on my phone...though now that I think about it, I should’ve! Dang it!

See, I would have never seen all this backstage non-drama had I showcased the fangirl side of me. They’d have probably jumped on the next plane to Manila, and on to their next stop and sworn never to return so long as that crazy girl was still a citizen of Malaysia.

Or I would’ve gotten a black eye. I’m not gonna lie, some of em bodyguards look too dang big for their own good!

So looonngggggg story short, I had a blast! I keep re-telling this story to all my friends and personally, I think they’re getting sick of me. So, I figured I’d just write about it, let it out, you know? Hopefully then I’ll stop talking about one of the greatest moments of my life!

..........I should really ease up now. Kthxbai! 

AAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!! 

[saymypiece]

Mourning tea

It has been quite some time since I wrote in here but this time, I write with a heavy heart. It has been a nail-biting and mind-boggling couple of weeks. And now, its just heart wrenching.

I'm talking about the MAS Flight MH370. Although I don't know any one of the passengers who were on-board, this tragic incident has just affected me so terribly.

There are just so many questions in my head right now. But then again, all the speculations and blame-games going on...STOP IT! Please?

This is a time of mourning and a time to encourage. There are enough issues to handle on top of the thousand conspiracy theories people are just churning in their heads and vomiting out. Let the truth be the truth and not information tainted with personal or political bias.

With regards to reports on CNN, I'm thoroughly disappointed and frustrated that a news channel, supposedly dedicated to delivering news as it is, suggest and imply in their interviews with various people in regard with the Flight MH370 incident that the Malaysian government is to be blamed.

Being a Malaysian, I feel it.

Malaysia is a developing country. Technology, economy, politics, etc. Everything is 'in development'. There has not been many catastrophic incidents we have had to deal with. And here we are talking about a missing Boeing 777.

A MISSING 777 is a big deal, heck it's a GIGANTIC deal! We need the big guns to help us because truth be spoken, we don't have that kind of experience, expertise or technology. We cannot coordinate AND conduct an entire search operation, deploy aircrafts and ships and detect images from satellites.

We are NOT there yet!

Speaking objectively, from a Malaysian point-of-view, not with any political attachment, I think the Malaysian government made several mistakes, especially in the first few press conferences. It was bound to happen. They were just flung into deep, NEW waters with no head or tail knowledge of what to do. 

Thank goodness for Richard Quest!

To those who just jumped on the bandwagon of criticising and blaming the Malaysian authorities, if you have concrete evidence, and by concrete I don't mean word-of-mouth or forwarded emails, that they have had something to hide, if you attended press conferences and participated in some kind of operation that has to do with the search of our beloved aircraft, then by all means please, go ahead. No one will question your credibility.

However, if you just found an excuse to practice your argumentative right on a government that is not your favourite, if you just decided "since everyone is making a big fuss about this issue, I should too..", then knock yourself out, please yourself but at least have the courtesy to do it with consideration and ethics.

Journalism isn't journalism without ethics in play.

[saymypiece]

Summer heat

Some of my favourite summer poems.

Summer sun by Robert Louis Stevenson

Indian summer by Henry Van Dyke

Moonlight, summer moonlight by Emily Bronte

To summer by William Blake

Summer by Alexander Pope

Enjoy :D

[saymypiece]

Sweet winter

Some of my favourite poems.

Santa Fe in winter by Deborah Ager

To winter by William Blake

A winter eden by Robert Frost

Blow, blow, thou winter wind by William Shakespeare

Winter by William Shakespeare

Winter in the country by Claude McKay

Enjoy :D

[saymypiece]

Serious Annoyance!

Why are there links on my posts where I never put them in the first place. If I want a link on my text, I'LL PUT THEM IN!!!!! Get off me!!!!!

Oh, and if someone knows how to remove these oh-so-attractive-ad-trickery links, please let me know! I need help...NOW!!!!! 

FACEPALM OF THE NATION!!!!!

[saymypiece]

Making a Shoe-mmitment

When you go out at night, you need to make like a mini marriage with your shoe. You need to sit in your room, before you get ready, look at your shoes, make a commitment to it. 

"I promise no matter how painful and awful you make my feet feel, I might be bleeding, blistering, I will not take you off, until I come home. We are now married."

Girls make like hasty little commitments to their shoes its like "Til drunk do us part" NO, it's "Til home do us part."

Jenna Marbles, White Girls At The Club

[saymypiece]

I know I haven't posted anything in a while but I came across this video and I thought I'd share it with all Gleeks that were heartbroken when Dani Shay and Nellie Veitenheimer left The Glee Project. Hope you enjoy it.

[saymypiece]

I was still in a state of shock as I watched Nellie leave the Glee Project! How on earth COULD it have happened? Maybe I'm in a circle of the Nellie Team and I'm unable to look outside of the box, nevertheless, I found this blog post that speaks my thoughts out so precisely! What in the heck just happened? Go ahead and read it...and excuse me as I go ponder some more....

Nellie Veitenheimer Eliminated?? :O

(Okay so I didn’t even think about spoilers when I posted this so… yeah… spoilers? I’M SORRY.)

This isn’t a rant of anger like I’ve seen. This is a rant of confusion… a rant where I try to understand Ryan Murphy’s mind. 

It’s a little scatter-brained because that’s how I am; I flit between topics. I tried to go back and make it seamless, but… we’ll see…

Nellie’s awkward, quirky, and lacking in self-confidence. We’ve all experienced that. A lot of us still experience that. But she’s also motivational, inspirational, beautiful, and wonderful. And that’s why I find it so hard to believe Ryan sent her home.

Read More

[saymypiece]

These two are soooo adorable together! 

Blakellie forever!!!! <3

Here is their performance of Waiting For a Girl/Boy Like You http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54mdQkrso2E

*Screen explodes!!*

[saymypiece]

Spain Won!

Spain, holding up the cup of GLORY at EURO 2012 Ok, first off just to be clear, I am NOT a fan of Spain. In fact those little guys (imagining David Villa running, except he was not in any of the Euro 2012 matches) in red jerseys and navy blue shorts do nothing, NOTHING for me! That's a long intro about Spain for someone who claims to not care about the team. ANYWHOSE.... I watched the game last night, not because I was into either of the teams playing but only because it was my obligatory duty to watch. You should know that I am Malaysian and being Malaysian either sums me up as an absolute fanatical MUSLIM or, a no-brainer. Alright, alright, some local fellas are making names out there like lets see.......errm......there has to be....errmmm......Naji (whoops)....no, YUNAAAaaaaaaaaaaa.... .........aaaaaaaaa who TOTALLY sucked balls at her performance on Conan! Did you watch that? If you haven't, here you go "Yuna on Conan" Bask in the disappointment...go on now.... ...and don't even get started on telling me how at least she got up there and performed in front of international telly and Conan and f***** number of people and s*** and then dare me to do it instead coz guess what? I dun f***** have to. Know why? Coz I ain't a performer...............and neither is Rihanna! SHE... Is a stripper!:D Ok, routing back to being Malaysian, as there is always a common sporting passion that sweeps across a country in tsunamical waves, well in Malaysia it has always been.......... "lepak", and well, football. So, as a responsible Malaysian citizen, I have to fulfill my call as a game-watcher. I may not watch every single match played, but at least the finals? Also, I should equip myself with some of the essential facts:     Because I am a girl, and the well-built guys run around the field......WHY IN THE HECK DO YOU STILL WONDER WHY I WATCH IT?? I am Malaysian, not lesbian, all the time (just sometimes)...just sayin....     It is a really good, and cheap (I'm of Indian descent) method to get to know a guy's intimate or vulnerable position, for self-defense....HELLO!!!<Wait..what were you thinkin?>     That an all star-studded team would want to win for the name but a real team would want to win for the passion...     Hmmm <blank>.....<teary eyes> So what I am actually saying is <sniff>....that nothing I said has anything to do with what the title of this post suggest I would and those of you who are still actually here, THANK YOU, for spending your time and patience reading this. (P.S. But just so you know, not that I wanna freak you out or anything but erm, the clock's-a-tickin and you NEED to go...)