#i am typing this out purely to look busy because if i go back to my transcribing rn i'll hear the song
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khaotunq ¡ 5 months ago
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I'm sitting in a coffee shop because I needed to Get Out Of My Head for a bit, doing my translating/transcribing, minding my business. Sad love song comes on the radio and I'm welling up.
I like the idea if anyone looked over at that moment, they might think I'm struggling with a breakup or something romantic. Truth is I'm thinking about it being on the radio all the time the week I had to put my cat down and I miss her stupid growly face :<
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honeydazai ¡ 8 months ago
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୨୧·࣭࣪̇˖ sending them suggestive pictures while they're at work
feat.: Dazai, ChĹŤya, Ranpo, Fukuzawa, Fyodor, Sigma
content: nsfw, female reader, spanking, sexting, oral sxx, masturbation, semi public
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It's not unusual for DAZAI to tap away on his phone during work hours, so no one — except for Kunikida, who still hasn't given up on glaring — pays it any mind when his smirk widens at his screen. What remains a secret, however, is that he's not looking at some funny tweet but instead at your tits, the blue lace of your bra making for a pleasant contrast in colour.
He's awfully smug about the whole ordeal, really; also, who is he not to play along? He definitely sends you not only some appreciative words back, but also a picture of his own, featuring either his hands — he does know that you're quite fond of his fingers, after all —, his face — because you can never complain about that! —, or his by now half-hard dick, pressing against his trousers, even though taking soft nudes borders on workplace indecency. Oh, and your pictures are definitely saved and stored away on his phone for later usage.
[new message from Dazai] “someone's needy, harassing me during work hours! just kidding bella!! you're so cute xx stunning too! how am i supposed to listen to kunikida any longer when you're so so pretty? :( ill call out sick, be there in 20 x”
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CHŪYA really doesn't expect to see anything but a picture of a dog you saw outside or of a particularly pretty flower when he spares a brief glance at his phone during a Port Mafia meeting. It's already disrespectful, though he doesn't plan on anyone noticing the miniscule action — that is, until he all but chokes on his coffee at the photo of you, legs spread wide, two fingers deep inside of yourself, wearing not only his favourite lingerie set, but also one of his ties.
He tries hard to ignore the way everyone stares at him when he, all too abruptly, excuses himself to the bathroom, his face bright red. In the safety of a stall, he really can't do anything but shove his trousers to his knees, one hand immediately closing around his dick while he types your number into his phone with his free one — and while he might snap at you, oh so flustered, he's also so damn turned on that he can barely focus on anything but the sound of your voice and your photo.
“Fucking Hell, babe—, God, with how Mori was looking at me, I bet he knew what was up. Fuck—, send me another one, please, I'm so damn close, ah—”
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Business meetings aren't RANPO'S favourite way to spend time. They're awfully boring, making him huff and sigh when he has to sit through them — though this one gets a lot more interesting the moment he clicks on a text message from you. He raises an eyebrow at the sight of your panties, pure lace and hiding not even the slightest bit just how wet you are, thighs glistening, though that's about all the physical reaction he's going to show. The fact that his dick strains against his trousers is no one's business.
He is, however, quick to text you back, amusement dripping from his messages, and if Fukuzawa wasn't already watching him with sharp eyes, he'd sneak away to the bathroom to call you. For now, you'll just have to do with sexting — this meeting is going to go on for a while, especially if he won't soon start contributing, and he's unfortunately got better things to do.
[new message from Ranpo] “having fun without me? youre so mean. at least send me more pics im dyin g here... maybw bend over or— ooo i know, we bought that toy a while ago, right? why don't you use that one for me, doll....”
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FUKUZAWA sucks in a sharp breath the second his eyes fall onto your form clad in nothing but one of his yukatas, and even though he attempts to remain calm, he's already blushing, arousal churning low in his stomach. Really, he was just trying to take a miniscule break from all the paperwork he's facing — besides, the cat ringtone signaling your message did sound rather urgent! —, though now he's not certain whether he can focus on it again.
He ends up typing “This is most inappropriate.” in response, though he never sends it, instead replacing it with a “You look stunning.”, only to never send that one either. In the end, he just quits work a little earlier that day and hurries home faster than he'd ever want to admit, cheeks still flushed with arousal when he joins you in bed, immediately slotting himself between your pretty thighs, long fingers spreading your folds apart and into your cunt to prepare you — only to realise you've long done that yourself. How convenient. He might reprimand you a little afterwards, though both of you realise it's not to be taken seriously. When he's honest with himself, he rather liked that photo — and he'll definitely keep it.
“That was awfully inappropriate. Darling, you know I enjoy getting to hear from you during the day, and yet — what? I didn't mind you wearing my clothing in the slightest. I was worried about someone from the Agency seeing the picture. In fact, wear my clothes again whenever you feel like it. Please do. You looked quite irresistible.”
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It's almost unfair just how seemingly unbothered FYODOR is. When checking his phone during a Decay of Angels meeting, aware that you know not to contact him except for important reasons, he merely glances at the photo lewdly depicting your raised skirt and the curve of your behind before putting it back into his pocket. Really, it's downright adorable that you're attempting to tease him — you should know better by now, darling.
While he doesn't bother with a response, he certainly makes sure to pay attention to you when he returns home. And, oh, the next time you want to toy with him, he sure hopes you remember this very moment, of you bent across his lap, his hand coming down ever so often on your butt, on the soft skin of your upper thighs, making you cry out with every slap. The marks, at least, will serve as a nice reminder, especially when you keep forgetting to thank him for every hit.
“There we go, dear. Ah, ah — don't cry now. This is what you wanted, is it not? My undivided attention — and you certainly have it, now. Which number were we on again? Tell me, darling, or we will have to start over, I'm afraid.”
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The second SIGMA spares a quick glance at his phone, only to stumble upon a rather revealing picture you just sent him — and, God, 'rather revealing' is an understatement when he's able to see just how wet you are, thighs spread for the camera —, his face heats up significantly, earning him some odd looks from the other men he's currently in a meeting with. In a desperate attempt to regain professionalism, he clears his throat, trying to simply continue, but it's as if every thought has been erased from his mind and was replaced by you.
When getting home that evening, he's calmed down considerably, cheeks still warm with the memory of you being this bold, though his sudden calmness might just change when you expect him in that exact same position, legs wide apart, the smile on your face teasing — and who is he not to end up on his knees in front of you, tongue flattening against your cunt while both of you let out breathy moans? In the end, he's all but begging you to return the favour.
“Ah, God, I'm close. At least finish me off, please—, you were really cruel today, dear. Make it up to me? Please? Oh, fuck—”
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toxycodone ¡ 5 months ago
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Laios x Beastkin!Reader
an. Senshi, Chilchuck, and Marcille x Reader are mentioned quiiiite a bit in here. Izutsumi x reader is more sparse. split between furry/scaly/feathery beastkin after the more general ones in the beginning. SORRY if the formatting is weird I got "text limited" a lot on this lmfao
this is a lot so. <3 show sum luv
general sfw
when you two first meet...bro is ELATED. He knows Izutsumi, which is fine, but you're an entirely different one. Who also doesn't seem to be super against him getting to know them
He asks SO many questions. What are you mixed with? Are you naturally born or artificial? What's it like having wings? A tail?
He's testing out all your features. He loves them so much.
When there's downtime, he likes to conduct "research". This goes for analyzing your features and making notes, comparing them to his books and other notes, and even more intricate tests like reaction time and stuff.
He'll hold a candle/torch by your face and test your pupil dilation. It's oddly intimate because he's just staring you down and its like. okay. are we gonna kiss orrrr
Loves. Loves. Loves just WATCHING you. Seeing the way you pounce on little bugs for fun or get spooked by certain noises. He just smiles and is all amused.
You'll catch him doodling you pretty often. He makes notes like "y/n caught a treasure bug today. They seem pretty skilled at hunting. Failed to kill it for some reason...just played with it until it scurried off." The doodles are like...surprisingly pretty decent. The monster portions of you are the best looking and most detailed. But it's so cool to see just how much he pays attention to you and your idiosyncrasies.
Your interactions with Izutsumi also interest him. Do you guys get along? Are you prey to her? Or is she to you? If you and Izu are talking or around each other he's watching like a hawk out of pure curiosity.
However...there's a particular page in his journal where he's providing feedback on how he would make you "better" aka cooler. It's basically just his own ramblings. No Laios, an extra set of eyes and the ability to breath fire and ice and everything in between is not. better. you're just salivating over the idea of your monster OC
If you bring this up to him he actually agrees. After a lot of note taking and observation he's really fascinated just on how well suited your entire existence is to...surviving. He has a lot of theories he'd love to share about you.
But he has e x t e n s i v e notes on your body. It's something that fr makes you blush because, why is he theorizing about the base of your tail and how it connects to your spine? and the number of nipples you have? wait...how is his guess right...?
But Laios is so useful. You might as well call him your owner. You don't have to lift a finger when it comes to taking care of yourself. (He misses his dogs so you fill in.)
He takes care of your skin/fur/scales/feathers, cuts your claws, helps you file down your hooves or horns. He's very into taking care of you if you'll let him. (Marcille also hops in on this since its her love language LOL. When she's not busy with Izutsumi she helps when she can.)
If you are like...afraid of water or don't enjoy bathing. You are like the party's pet. They're debating on how to get you clean before Chilchuck is like "if you don't take a bath I am going to kill you and throw you in there myself." Laios then goes all puppy dog eyed bc he thinks Chil is being to hard on you and then he sighs and is like "fine. I'll buy you a treat when we get back to the surface."
Marcille/Laios are really good when it comes to bath time. They aren't weird about it (Laios is checking you out but. In a curious type of way. Marcille is giving him side eye if hes getting too...Laiosy. But he respects your boundaries. Just imagine Laios happily scrubbing you while humming a tune awe.)
And when it comes to sleeping arrangements...you can alternate between anyone in the party. But Laios and Chilchuck are your best bets. Marcille is an excellent sleeping partner if the dreams don't bother you, shes soo happy to have you sleep with her and she's soft and smells nice.
Laios happily lets you sleep with him. He's actually not super cuddly (unless you are he'll reciprocate). But he is very much like, giving you a ton of space. If you fall asleep before him he just relents and sleeps as comfortably as he can around you lol. Literally just like any other pet owner.
Chilchuck....sleeping with him is difficult bc Izutsumi will fight you on it, but she relents if you can fit in without much issue (bonus points if you're warm) so. You guys can both overheat this poor man. Izu may even start cuddling with you more. She finds a lot of comfort in having another beastkin in the party even though she won't say it.
And speaking of Chilchuck...you're likely a bit more cooperative than Izutsumi, so he gets your help when it comes to checking for traps and finding treasure. With your elite hearing and other abilities, he's actually really pleasantly surprised how useful you are. (If you were a half-foot he'd definitely want you in his guild). He gives you pets and treats when the others aren't really paying attention (He doesn't want them to see him doting on you is all LOL).
Okay. So. Your diet. This is an anime about eating so. Let's get down to it.
Whether you're a herbivore, carnivore, or omnivore--Laios is ENSURING your needs are taken care of in the party. It is of upmost importance to him.
He takes notes and asks about how certain foods make you feel. Are you more energized? Less energized? Stomach hurting? Pooping well? (Will ask this with upmost sincerity, he wants to make sure the butter/milk/etc used in their cooking isn't interfering with your tummy. Whether you want to answer this is up to you lol).
Laios and Senshi happily adjust things to your needs. Laios will spend time foraging with you, Senshi will find certain monsters with more nutrients that meet your needs. Senshi is also like, really knowledgeable about nutrients, so sometimes in your food he may grind up shells or bones to meet calcium needs and such. When he cooks he'll give you bones or soften them up in water so you can eat the marrow. :-)
Senshi...is the coolest though. He also lets you perch on him (like Izutsumi) and since he's lived in the dungeon for so long, he knows a lot about monsters firsthand. If it applies, he'll give you tips about yourself or some monsters you should prey on. Senshi and you go on little foraging trips too. He'll have you sniff things out in return for extra food during dinner.
Laios likes to see you hunt prey and eat it raw, though. Everyone else would rather not and it makes them sick but he thinks it is SO cool. He honestly wishes he could do that. He takes hunting lessons from you and will give you tips on being stealthier and such.
Your teeth really fascinate him. He likes testing your bite strength on different types of material (Like wood, stone, bones, etc.). He'll stick his fingers in your mouth and admire them if youd let him. He gives you so much praise in general its so cute.
AND. PETTING YOU. He is so tactile if you let him (i mean look how much he tries and fails to pet izutsumi). When you give him the all clear he is like. jumping for joy. he LOVES to pet you and praise you. He absentmindedly pets you when hes sitting down or standing by you. And when you nuzzle into his touch his heart SOARS. You can see on his face he's blushing and has that like. excited wiggly smile <3
I think when he's just sitting around he just messes with your tail. He likes it.
Lay down beside him and he will happily pet you and be like "do you like this? Is this a good spot?" Present. Your belly to him. and he is over the moon. He pets you wildly and is like "Who's a good boy/girl/monster?" He is so unashamed about doing this too. Chilchuck would put a stop to it if you didn't like it so much.
If you give him kisses or tongue bath's he's eating that shit up (i mean. look at those extra comics w him and dogs he lets dogs just kiss all over his face omfg). He isn't a huge fan of getting his hair wet (sensory issue) but when it's your drool...he can't help but be excited. Laios is all like "they're grooming me?? this means they like me, right??? Can I officially say I befriended a monster???"
It's proof that you care for him and view him as apart of your pack...he is just over the moon at this.
I will say...Laios is way too "has no backbone with you" for a while. You're chewing shoes? You can't help it! Stealing snacks? It's instinctual! Playing too rough with Izutsumi? C'mon guys...
But when he notices his party actually getting upset. You will be surprised how he can put his foot down. Not even max puppy eyes work on him. He will leash and muzzle you if needed.
But you can always get away with messing with his stuff. He thinks its fun to chase you around when you got his shirt in his maw. Then he happily wears the torn up gear and Marcille is like "let me sew it..."
For Scaly Beastkin:
He's so helpful when it comes to shedding season. Laios finds nice rocks all the time and helps scrape off any patches that are drying and crusting and hes not even phased and doesn't think its gross at all. He would keep some skin to test its resilience if you let him.
And going with that, when you need to shed and soak he would help you find a place and will happily assist with the shedding. He's so excited to be there honestly. But he feels bad you are uncomfortable so he lets you cuddle up under the water with him while you wait for your shed to soften up <3
Laios runs his fingers over your scales absentmindedly...just loves feeling how smooth they are, especially after he spent so much time helping them maintain that pristine smoothness.
He gets Marcille's help to make a moisturizing ointment to put on you every now and then so you don't get to dried out in the dungeon!! Marcille starts to fret about that too. You're just kinda chillin and she'll reach over and put ointment on your hands/cheeks/tail. Just areas you may be susceptible to drying out.
Also...he lets you use him as a heating rock. Sunshine is really limited in the dungeon, so...when you need a warm up he's there and waiting and extremely excited to warm you up with a hug.
For Furry Beastkin:
Brushes you. He'd do this EVERY evening (and morning) if you let him. He takes notes, too. Do you have an undercoat? Or is it just one? What does this mean about what environment you originated from?
He probably tries to use your shed fur to embellish his own clothes or put in his pillow/blankets. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle I guess?
And to add to that...remember how Marcille made a cute little cat head from Izutsumi's fur? He does that too. He and Marcille make cute little shapes outta your shed and giggle together about it.
If you get fleas...he is the party member you should tell. He'll help you get rid of them and won't rat you out to the other members LOL. He'd probably blame himself if it spread and the rest of the party is like "you expect us to beleive. you got fleas. Laios you would be excited if you got them."
For Feathered Beastkin:
Preening....<3. When you have pin feathers he is so sweet and gentle. gently picks them out. It kinda tickles bc he's just gliding his fingers over your wings. You'll catch him sighing in content and burying his face in the softness. It's so sweet.
He collects your feathers and shows them off to Marcille (who also really likes them.) Your down is SO useful too. The party has the softest blankets and pillows thanks to you. When you're molting everyone is calling dibs on the feathers to stuff in their bedding.
Laios examines your wingspan and is really interested on stuff like weather you can fly or not. If you can, he's in awe. He wants to see it. Maybe even fly with you if he can. Its always been a dream of his to do that.
nsfw
tw (for nsfw). monsterfucking? if that counts. mentions of vent/cloaca/knot
This man. It is so easy to tell overtime just how fucking horny he gets over monster stuff. He is addicted to just how much you differ from him. Your scales, fur, feathers, wings, etc....he thinks they're all extremely sexy.
He just loves the primal aspect of it? Like you act on instinct. Do what makes you happy. Like of course you have human reasoning and such but STILL. You're so non human and otherworldly it makes his stomach knot up and his dick hard as a rock. He wants to know EVERYTHING about you.
If you have a heat/rut cycle...he is. fucking. begging you come to him for help. jfc you don't even have to let him stick his dick in you. He just slowly probes your hole with his fingers and legit GASPS when he feels it clench around him. Not only is he learning so much about you and monster anatomy but hes also having his monster fucking dreams come true.
I mean it is a given with Laios but his fucking face is always in your hole. He loves eating pussy/ass so fucking much. And having your dick, clit, or knot down his throat drives him wild. He eats your slick and cum like he's starving. He's so sloppy with it too--there's spit and slick and cum all over his face and he's just slurping it all up like its his last meal.
He definitely "examines" you. He'll stick his fingers in you and stretch out your hole just to get a better look at what's inside. (imagine his thumbs sliding in and prying you open.) The muscles pulsating and the color and the smell...god he's drooling. You feel all vulnerable and exposed but he's just constantly praising how amazing your body and its functions are.
He busts so quick with a beastkin it....wow. Like. You are seriously all he has ever dreamed of and shit. I can't imagine he'd be able to contain himself. He cums and just still wants more, he fucks you through the overstimulation until he cries
Oh he wants to know whats in your pants so bad its ridiculous. Like. I cannot explain just how much he is vibrating with excitement
If you have a cloaca...he's very gentle with your hole at first. You explain to him what to look for, what feels good. He'll gently explore with his fingers until he finds the right hole and then he's going at it. He's shoving his tongue in there happily too. He knows what a cloaca is. He knows it's a singular vent for waste and sexual functions. Doesn't matter. His tongue is going in there. Laios is beyond excited to taste everything and see what makes you squirm.
If you have a knot...it's a given he wants you to knot him. It takes him a few tries (he can't take your knot at first because he's too tight) but when he finally is able to its like. euphoric for him. He loves feeling your warm cum in his ass and your desperate pants against his throat as your overstimulated self gets adjusted to being stuck to him. Gods.
Plus...I've discussed this on my blog in more detail but with a beastkin reader he's definitely into
You biting/scratching him up. He lovvveess being marked. Use him as a chew toy PLEASE
Predator/Prey rp: He's a trained hunter but he wouldn't mind being hunted...He loves how strong you are and how you can turn the tables on him if you wanted.
Just?? You being feral?? He likes it when you act more like your monster side and just treat him like a toy.
Breeding Kink: Even if you aren't able to get pregnant or breed (either due to sex or incompatible genetics due to being part monster), he's still really into it. You can fill him up vice versa...He loves the feeling of having you last inside him and he loves knowing you're still filled up from him. Plus, it adds to the more animalistic part of sex which is what he likes
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synqiri ¡ 4 months ago
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KISS ME ONCE (BEFORE YOU GO).
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or, the kind of kiss he is.
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PAIRING: sunday, scaramouche x gn!reader
WARNINGS: none
WORDCOUNT: 1K || CONTENT: implied arranged marraige (sunday's part), fluff, slice of life, lots of kisses, mild angst(?)
NOTES: im never shutting up ab sundays wings sorry
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SUNDAY as a kiss hello.
he is calm and collected and elegant, and his kisses are very much the same. most often, it is a kiss on your knuckles as he greets you, his hand in yours and his head dipped low. he’ll smile, perfectly practised and purely business, and after he has deemed it suitably romantic enough, he’ll drop your hand. you’ll smile through it all. you’ve long since grown used to it.
still, you like to believe he has at least a semblance of affection for you. in the privacy of your shared home, his kisses feel less perfunctory and his smile more genuine. he’ll laugh as you converse, subdued and uneven as if he’s long since forgotten how to laugh, but they are laughs nonetheless.
and when he kisses you good night, he’ll press one to the tip of your lip, never on the lip itself, never for longer than a second. you’ll wish him good night in turn and act as if all is well, though all you wish is for him to love you a little more.
except… he does. 
there is one night, one random, ordinary night that you are roused from your sleep. he has taken your hand in his, you realise, and you pretend you are still asleep. the entire time, he doesn't say a word. the entire time, he fiddles with the ring on your finger. for a second, his fingers brush against your cheek, but the touch is drawn away quicker than it had come. he sighs, and the sound of it echoes in the largeness of the bedroom. you can feel his gaze on yours, sweeping and thorough, but his expression is something you can only imagine. 
that night, you don’t remember when you had fallen asleep, yet neither do you remember his hand dropping yours.
after that, you can no longer see him in the same light. or perhaps in all the years you’ve been married, you’ve never truly seen him at all. when you tell robin of this discovery over lunch, she can only laugh.
“how cute,” she gushes. “i’ve always found my brother to be quite the open book when it comes to you. want to know a secret? his wings say it all.”
the next time you greet him in his office, you follow her advice and watch his wings. 
they flutter.
in all honesty, it is barely a twitch, barely noticeable and impossible to catch for anyone unless they had known it was there in the first place. still, it is proof enough. proof that he liked you far more than he let on, far more than you ever expected.
as per routine, he takes your hand in his, ghosting a kiss over your knuckles and smiling his picture perfect smile. this time, you grin back.
“has something pleasant happened?” he asks. “you seem to be in a good mood today.”
“no, nothing much — i was just happy to see you.”
he chuckles softly, and he almost looks delighted. “as am i.”
(it's wonderful, this newfound feeling. you're glad that with him, you still have an eternity to share.)
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SCARAMOUCHE as a kiss goodbye.
he is sharp and guarded and hot-tempered, and his affection never comes easily. in fact, some may consider his interest a curse rather than a blessing. though, you’ll never change it for anything in the world, for you adore him too much to back out of it now. his kisses are much like him, demanding and greedy and forceful, with his hands clawing into your skin so hard you’re sure they’ll leave marks. you relish these types of kisses, and you give as good as you get.
he is also possessive and overcautious to a fault, and while he will never admit it, you know it’s because he fears you’ll leave. still, you know you won’t, not even if it kills you.
there is no one in the fatui who does not know that you are his. he has made sure of that effortlessly. there was a point in time he massacred anyone who did so much as look at you wrong, and you play your part wonderfully, standing by his side with your head held up high.
occasionally, he lets his guard fall, and you love those days as much as you hate them, for they always mean he has to leave for a mission. on those days, his kisses are gentler, peppered all over you as if to mark you his. on those days, his kisses are just as greedy, his grip on your body impossibly tighter.
“how long will you be gone?” you ask him curiously. “even that dottore is going with you. that’s rare.”
“it depends on how it all unfolds.” he shrugs, a casual ‘eh’ leaving his lips. then, he smirks, a dangerous glint in his eye. his hand reaches up to caress your cheek from where he is stretched across the bed, his head on your lap. “worry not, my heart. i will return a god, and i will have all of teyvat in the palms of my hands.”
you don’t tell him you already think he’s divine, nor do you ask if he could be satisfied with just you. you know better than to do that, anyway. he is greedy and ambitious and would never be satisfied until the world turned to ashes, you've known that from the moment you decided to love him.
so instead, you take his hand, smacking a big, fat kiss to the inside of his palm. he scowls, glancing away, but you don't mind a bit.
“that’s for good luck,” you tell him brightly. you tap on your lips twice then. “won't you kiss me back? i know you've got to be at the port in an hour.”
he rolls his eyes, getting up and out of bed. “don’t be ridiculous. no power in the world can bless someone with luck — and you think a kiss will?”
“it's only for fun,” you say, pouting. “whatever, it’s fine. see you when you come back home!”
he says nothing in reply, yet the wicked grin on his face already says it all. he shrugs on his coat, tipping on his hat — and he is off, just like that. 
(months later, as he is falling, he wishes he had kissed you goodbye.) 
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httpdwaekki ¡ 9 months ago
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migraine | b.c.
summary: you were known to have pretty intense migraines but chan is there to help you feel better.
wc: 1.9k
warnings: no warnings, just pure fluff, tad bit of hurt/ comfort, sweet channie as always, and in true ashton fashion far too many petnames lmao. very lightly proofread (p.s. i am in my wolfchan lover arc, need him immediately.)
a/n: omg ashton got lost in the sauce again? * gasp* shocker! yeah this took me way too long to write but whatever. i actually don't hate this which is crazy but this is self indulgent because i get some pretty intense, nasty migraines that can last a couple days and it sucks. but if you suffer from the same thing i hope this can bring you some comfort and also i recommend a gel cap that you put in the freezer. an actual game changer, trust. anyway, i hope you enjoy! remember to eat, drink water and take your meds, ily <3
*lowercase intended*
my library
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(pictures are not mine! credit to owners!)
you had some pretty nasty migraines, no secret to you or chan. they last anywhere from a few hours to a few days and while there were things to help lessen the pain and pressure, sometimes you just had to ride it out.
this was unfortunately one of those times. now usually you would call chan as soon as you felt the first telltale sign of a migraine . this time however, you didn’t, you knew he was busy with work and didn’t want to interfere with that. but you were selfishly starting to regret that decision as everything you were doing did nothing to help.
it seemed like everything did nothing but increase the pressure in your head, spreading to your face. in a last ditch effort to get some sleep you put on some migraine music, pressed a cold compress to your eyes and pulled wolfchan to your chest.
the soft plushie smelled faintly of chan’s cologne, the only thing actually helping you relax. but it also made you miss the aussie man, wishing he was by your side, rubbing your temples, softly lulling you to sleep.
you didn’t even realize you were crying until you felt a warm tear drip down to your neck. you knew you had to calm down or you risk making everything worse but you couldn’t. you were overwhelmed by the pressure in your head and frustrated with nothing helping to release it.
you felt selfish and guilty but you knew you needed chan, you felt like you were going insane without him. hesitantly you moved the compress from your eyes, grabbing your phone.
despite the brightness being on the lowest possible setting, you felt a sharp pain behind your eye as the screen turned on. you unlocked your phone, clicking chan’s contact, you quickly typed out a message.
to channie <3 :
hi, i’m so sorry to ask but i really don’t know what else to do, i have a migraine and nothing's helping. i know you're working but is there anyway when you finish up at the studio you could come over? even for a little bit, if not i totally get it, just thought i’d ask, love you bug.
you hit send, locking your phone, placing it on the soft sheets, placing the compress back over your eyes. a few minutes passed before you felt your phone buzz beside you. you move the cold compress once more, bracing yourself for the light from your phone.
from channie <3:
can you call me jagi? i don’t want you to keep looking at your phone screen, love you too sweet girl.
you click his contact once more, hitting the little phone icon next to his name causing the calming music to stop, a loud ringing replacing it. this caused you to wince and quickly lower the volume before putting it on speaker so you could place the cooling pack back over your eyes.
it didn’t take long before he picked up. “hi my baby, what’s going on?” he asked softly.
“my head hurts,” you started, words slightly slurred. “it’s really bad channie.” you take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself down. “i’ve tried everything and nothing’s working, i don’t know what to do.” you softly cried, tears making their way down your cheeks once more.
“okay angel okay, take a deep breath, i need you to relax for me okay? i know it hurts but it’s gonna hurt worse if you’re upset.” you hear rustling in the background.
“i’m just finishing up a few things here and then i’m gonna head over, okay sweetheart?” you respond with a soft whimper, followed by a quiet, “okay.” you press the pack further into your eyes, chasing the coolness that is quickly leaving the gel filled pack.
“do you want me to stay on the phone with you till i get there?” he asks softly, packing his bag.
“yes, please.” you mumbled. “okay baby, just keep breathing and focus on me, okay? i’m gonna pick up some food on the way too, okay?” you hummed in response, rolling over, pushing the soft plushie to your cheek, breathing in the familiar scent.
“everything okay?” you hear changbin ask in the background. “yeah, y/n has a migraine, so i’m going to help her.” chan responds.
“oh no, i hope she feels better, let us know if you guys need anything.” you hear han chime in, your heart swelling at the boys concern.
“will do, thank you, i’ll see you guys later.” you hear him open the studio door making his way into the hallway.
“you still with me, jagi?” he asks softly. “yeah, i’m here.” face squished into the soft fabric. “alright sweetheart, i’m gonna mute for a bit just until i get to my car, okay?” he asks, the elevator dings in the background, signaling its arrival.
“okay.” you say sleepily. “i love you baby, i’ll be right back.” you hear him press a button in the elevator. “love you too bub.” your words slurring slightly.
after chan muted, you felt yourself slowly succumb to the exhaustion, phone positioned next to you on the sheets, wolfchan tucked safely against your cheek, you, curled up in a soft blanket .
that is exactly how chan found you about 25 minutes later as he walked in your room, the space dimly lit by the oil diffuser sitting on your bedside table. he left the take-out bags sitting on your kitchen counter, fresh compress and cold water in hand. he gently places the water on your desk, making his way over to you.
he grabs your phone, ending the call before turning off the relaxing music. he sits next to your sleeping form, gently taking the warm pack off your face. he places a kiss on your forehead before placing the fresh compress on your eyes.
you tense for a moment, before relaxing as the cold begins to relieve the tension once more. you stir awake from the sudden change in temperature. “channie?” you asked, sleep laced in your voice.
he places a hand on your hips, his thumb rubbing soothing circles to the area. “hi, my baby,” he whispers. “how are you feeling hm?” he asks, continuing the soothing motion. you move the cool pack, grabbing his free hand, in this lap, threading your fingers together before placing a kiss on the back of his.
“better now that you’re here.” you murmured, giving him a small smile. he smiled back before leaning down and placing a kiss on your forehead.
“i got you some ramen, i’m gonna go grab it for you okay?” you nodded, him standing, still keeping your hand in his. he leans down to press a soft kiss to your forehead before placing the compress back over your eyes, grabbing the warm one to put back in the freezer .
he gives your hand a light squeeze before walking away. you relax into the soft mattress below you while chan goes to grab the hot soup and some medicine just in case.
he walks in with the tray, setting it on your desk next to the cold water collecting condensation on the wood below it. he makes his way over to you, sitting next to you once again, gently lifting the pack off your eyes. “there she is,” he placed a hand on your cheek, setting the compress next to you.
“hi baby.” he smiled, softly stroking your cheek. you give him a small smile back before turning your head slightly to place a kiss to his palm. “can you sit up for me please?” you nod softly before slowly moving to lean against the wall behind you.
“careful jagi.” he whispered, quickly placing a hand behind your head. “thank you, bug.” you mumble, adjusting the pillows behind you, placing wolfchan in your lap . chan stands up once more, placing the water on the tray before bringing it over to you.
“thank you, chan, you really didn’t have to do all this.” you say, guilt creeping up on you once again. he shakes his head. “nope, none of that. i’m your boyfriend, this is my job.” he places the tray on your lap, taking his place next to you once again.
“plus, i love taking care of you. if you need me, i’m there. any time, any place, simple as that.” your heart swells, you feel a lump form in the back of your throat. “you can’t say stuff like that when i’m like this, i’ll cry.” you play with the plushie’s ears before feeling a finger lift your chin.
“i love you, and i’ll always be here for you, no matter where either of us are, okay?” he said, looking into your eyes, with nothing but love and sincerity. you nod, “i love you too.” he smilled, carefully leaning over to place a kiss on your forehead.
“now, you need to eat, i got your favorite.” he says, picking up the hot soup, opening the lid, before separating the chopsticks. he dips the wooden sticks in the soup, giving it a stir before grabbing some of the noodles.
he gently blows on the steaming noodles before offering it to you, container under it to catch any dripping soup. you giggle, “you know i can feed myself right?” he frowns, pushing the noodles and container closer to you. “eat.”
you smile before opening your mouth, accepting the food he so generously offered you. a smile made it’s way onto his face, feeding you a few more bites. he placed the container back down, chopsticks resting in the soup, before grabbing the medicine and water.
“take these.” he placed them in your hand, opening the water as you dropped the pills in your mouth. he hands you the water, watching as you greedly gulp down the cool beverage. “ how are you feeling, angel?” he asks gently.
“it still hurts but i think eating and drinking definitely helped.” you smiled, handing him the bottle. “ good, i’m glad. eat a few more bites then we’ll lay down, okay?” he says, picking up the soup once more.
you end up finishing the ramen before he grabs the tray and the now warm compress. “do you want a cold one?” he asks holding up the pack.
“yes please.” you nod slightly. “okay, get comfy, i’ll be right back jagi.” you smile laying back down as he leaves the room.
he comes back, shortly after, with a fresh compress and another bottle of water. he places the water next to your diffuser, placing the compress over your eyes. he circles the bed, climbing under the covers.
he lays down, pulling you into him, placing your head on his chest. you place your arm around his wait, hand slipping under his shirt, rubbing your thumb across his soft skin.
he brings his hand up, rubbing soft circles on your temples, placing kiss on the top of your head. “sleep jagi, we can shower when you wake up okay?’ you nod slightly against him.
“thank you, channie. i love you, more than you know.” you mumble, tightening your arms around him. “i love you too baby, i’ll always take care of you, okay?” placing one last kiss to your hair.
that’s how you stayed for the rest of the night, wrapped up in each other’s arms. the pressure in your head, slowly releasing, finally able to relax.
reblogs/feedback are appreciated! i hope you guys enjoyed!
do no repost
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fluentmoviequoter ¡ 3 months ago
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Celebrity Crush, Table for Two
Part 2 of Celebrity Crush
Pairing: Tim Bradford x fem!reader
Summary: You go on a date with your celebrity crush after meeting him in uniform. 1.2k+ words of fluff!
Masterlist | Tim Bradford Masterlist | Request Info/Fandom List
A/N: Thanks for the idea @anonymousmuffinbear! I hope you enjoy this. Thanks for reading and all of your kind words!🤍
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You sigh as you fall backward onto your couch. The past week has been busy and stressful, so you have had no time to relax. Now that you're caught up with work, you can finally catch up on everything you’ve wanted to do. Which, admittedly, isn’t much. With your remote, you scroll through your favorite streaming app to find something to watch. A new true crime documentary catches your eye, and you suddenly remember something. Tim Bradford gave you his number, and you haven’t done anything with it.
Before you can find his contact, your phone rings with a call from one of your friends. You love her but do not want to talk or hang out tonight.
“Hello,” you greet, despite every instinct telling you not to answer.
“Hey, girl! We’re going out for mini golf and dinner, are you in?” she asks.
“Not tonight. I’m exhausted, but I’ll try to join next time.”
“Okay, no worries. Get some rest! Oh, hey, how’s your celebrity crush?”
“Tim?”
“No, Rick Castle- yes! Tim!”
“I don’t know,” you admit, picking at your blanket. “I haven’t called him yet. I was about to text him.”
“Don’t text him, call him! You’ve already made that Greek god wait a week for you.”
“He’s probably busy.”
“Call him.”
You can’t argue again before she hangs up on you. As you find the right contact, you shake your head and click the button to text Tim. Tim is a cop, and you will not risk interrupting him in the middle of something important. So, you type out a quick message, hit send before you can overthink it, then set your phone aside and start the documentary about the Hillside Strangler.
“Should I have signed the text?” you ask aloud. You only wrote About that thanks over dinner…
As you wonder if Tim will know who it’s from, your phone buzzes with an incoming message. Tim’s name catches your attention, and you hold your breath as you read his text.
Tell me when and where.
To say you’re surprised would be an understatement, and you’ll never admit to anyone that you bounce up and down on your couch out of pure excitement as you tap out your reply. In a few minutes, you have a dinner set for tomorrow with your celebrity crush at one of LA’s many restaurants. As the narrator sets the scene for a vicious murder on the screen before you, you fall back on the couch with a smile because you have a date with your celebrity crush.
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“What am I supposed to wear?” you grumble as you look through your closet. “Is this even a date? Or just a chance to thank him again?”
You’ve only seen Tim in his uniform, but you know he will look amazing no matter what he wears. On the bright side, he’ll one-up me even if he’s in a t-shirt and sweatpants, you think. You stop as you pull a hanger forward. The perfect outfit was right in front of you the whole time. It just took an hour of stressing to find it.
Soon after, you enter the restaurant and look around, impressed by the atmosphere. More impressive, however, is Tim Bradford smiling at you from beside the hostess stand. He walks toward you, proving that you are right. The man can’t look bad, but he knows how to dress.
“You look beautiful,” Tim says.
“You do, too,” you answer. “Or handsome? You’re both- I… Thanks for meeting me.”
“Are you ready?”
You nod, and Tim offers his arm. With your arm looped through his elbow, you follow him to the table with your eyes on his face the entire time. Tim smiles at you as he pulls your chair out for you, and his fingers trail over your arm as he steps away.
“So,” Tim begins as he sits across from you. “What’s it like being one of the only women in the world that gets to go out with your celebrity crush?”
“Well, the only thing he’s done is help me to my seat and prove that he eavesdropped,” you murmur, looking down at the napkin in your lap.
“If you wanted a nice date, you should’ve chosen a different celebrity crush. I don’t have the best track record,” Tim admits.
You sigh dramatically but smile as you ask, “How soon can you get Aaron Thorsen down here to take over for you?”
“If I sent him a picture of how perfect you look, very quickly.”
“Tim, no one is a great date. Me included,” you promise, offering your hand across the table. “Besides, I thought I was just here to say thank you again and talk about the cases in the documentary.”
“Right,” Tim agrees. “But I’ll need something in return. If I tell you about the cases, you have to tell me about you.”
“Interesting case details for boring personal details? That’s a terrible deal for you.”
“Depends on where you stand.”
You shrug, but Tim takes your hand as a silent promise that he wants to hear about you and get to know you. This is a date, after all.
“You’ve been in three documentaries,” you begin, ignoring the menu and everything else around you. “Which of those cases was your favorite?”
“Morris Mackey,” Tim answers without hesitation.
“Because of Officer Thorsen?”
“Amongst other things. It was an interesting investigation.”
“I have to ask-“
“If seeing Jake Butler dead freaked me out?”
You pinch your brows and finish, “Is your Sergeant really that funny?”
“Oh, yeah,” Tim answers. “Grey is one of the best cops and best men I’ve ever met. Your turn. Why did you approach me in the store last week?”
“Are you kidding? I loved those documentaries, I wasn’t kidding. When else am I going to get the chance to meet someone from one of those?”
“I’m glad you texted,” Tim admits.
“I’m glad you gave me your number. You know, my friends thought my crush on you was weird until they saw you.”
“The Abercrombie model hot cop?” Tim asks with a knowing smile.
“Their words.”
“Are you ready to order?” your waiter asks.
“Oh, right,” Tim says, looking at the menu. “We’re going to need one more minute. Thank you.”
The waiter nods, and you wait until he walks away to laugh. Tim shakes his head as he raises the menu, and you decide right then that this is the best date you’ve ever been on.
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“Thank you, Tim. I had a great time,” you say as Tim walks you to your car.
“I did too,” he replies.
Tim slows and uses your joined hands to pull you toward him. He looks down at your shirt, visible beneath your sweater, and notices it’s the one he gave you from the store.
“Do you think I’m the kind of celebrity crush that can get a second date?” he asks.
You hum as you step closer to him. Slowly, you tilt your chin up and give Tim time to step back. He doesn’t, opting to meet you halfway. When your lips brush against Tim's, he has all the answers he needs. This is not going to be your last date. You raise your hand to his jaw, gently sliding your fingers against his skin before you move back, your other hand still in Tim’s.
Tim opens his eyes slowly as he asks, “Does this mean I have to watch true crime with you?”
You smile and laugh, squeezing Tim’s hand. “Oh, yeah. Who else can tell me how accurate everything is?”
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burgerrat ¡ 3 months ago
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Ok so @king-crawler technically I finished your 2 hour Turbo documentary yesterday at 3 AM BUT regardless I have recentlt watched it and I have a LOT I'd like to say, clarify details or lil things you might have missed or could be interpreted differently when you look at them another way :3
With that last bit I am diving head first into the flashback scene since it's heavily referencing that.
First and foremost, keep in mind that it is being narrated from Felix's point of view- remember that he was in his game doing his job when the accident happened, it was while every person ever was inside their respective game being busy being used as avatars; also referencing back what you said on Felix- he's not exactly the most understanding of others' situations, he stays well within his comfort zone. Keep that in mind.
When Roadblasters is plugged in the flashback, you can see the two players using TurboTime immediately abandon the game to check out the new one, and the screen Turbo's pixelated image apoears on is completely dark, don't you think that is very reminiscent of a Game Over screen? 🙃 meaning, the two players abandoned Turbo in the middle of a race, likely causing him to crash and lose.
Remember King Candy's shock, and sudden change in behaviour as soon as he sees Vanellope sprinting past him? What follows is a volatile fit of rage and violence when things don't go his way, this sudden change of trajectory. Wouldn't you reckon this moment could mirror how Turbo felt in the flashback? He's being used as an avatar, and suddenly he loses control as he gets ditched and gets his race put to a halt. That initial shock of "what is going on. This wasn't supposed to happen!"
Following that, while I don't doubt he got jealous, he SPRINTED into Roadblasters the moment he lost... but not to try to take it over- to take petty revenge instead, interrupting the players' race and causing them to crash just like they did to him, preventing him from winning in his game. Picture it as a "if I can't have this, then you won't have it either" type mentality towards Roadblasters.
Going back to Felix and why his ignorance/remaining within his bubble could have possibility caused him to misread Turbo's intentions. Felix also is one to make assumptions in the beginning of the movie, like how for example when trying to calm the Nicelanders when Ralph goes missing: "Ralph probably fell asleep in Tapper's bathroom again!" Or some such. It makes sense he would make assumptions about Turbo as well, ESPECIALLY if he knew him personally and how self-obsessed he is. Doesn't take a genius to realize this guy does not like to lose.
Secondly, the final boss scene. King Candybug in general really. I disagree with your idea that Turbo has always been this hungry for power he'd want to take over the entire arcade. We both know that if that happened, if every game was infested by Cy-bugs, Litwak would be forced to close down his business because all of the games would be unplayable. His 'attention' wouldn't last very long if every game gets unplugged, his thought process to take over the arcade is purely manic and deranged for someone like him who has been well-known to be a master manipulator, able to keep a stable facade for over a decade without wanting to take over other racing games? That 'taking over the arcade' sounds very unlike him. It sounds more like... a cy-bug's programming. A cy-bug's programming that has gained enough conciousness to start plotting and planning. Because it now has the intelligence of a person, fused with him, learned what he knows.
Speaking of which, remember the cybug that ate King Candy?
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Look at it's candy-pattern. Haven't we seen that somewhere before...?
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Oh right! Right here, when the cybug eats some pepperming roots.
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The same cybug that ended up there after falling into the taffy lake... after being ejected from a shuttle.
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The same cybug that Ralph brought with himself.
What was the very first thing that King Candybug said to ralph when they see eachother again for the showdown?
"Because of you, Ralph, I'm now the most powerful virus in the arcade!"
I don't think, during this one moment at least, that this was Turbo speaking.
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woso-dreamzzz ¡ 11 months ago
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Tesco
Leila Ouahabi x Reader
Connected to Uni Love II
Summary: How Leila got the bruise on her cheek
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Leila's minding her own business as she wanders through her local Tesco. She's got one earphone in as she goes down the snack aisle. She's meant to be getting food for a little meetup at Deyna and her girlfriend's house but, as the only one out of the Man City girls going currently not injured, she can afford to be a little bit late.
Every Brit she meets says that there's something magical about Big Tesco but, honestly, she's not entirely sure she gets the appeal.
Deyna's girlfriend gave her a list to stick to but Leila's pretty sure that lists are just guidelines anywhere so she's going off vibes only as she crouches down in front of one of the fridges full of dessert.
She doesn't even realise what's happening until she's sprawled out on the floor with pain blooming on her cheekbone. Leila looks up in confusion to see a full trolley where she used to be crouching and the prettiest girl she's ever seen approaching.
"Oh my god! I'm so sorry! Are you okay?!"
Leila's still completely star-struck as you approach, your hands fluttering over to check her face.
"I didn't even notice you! God, I'm sorry. Can I do anything? Are you alright?"
Leila, in a moment of pure adrenaline, captures your hand in her own and kisses the back of it. "I am so okay." She's trying to be smooth (Deyna and Laia would laugh at her if they were here) and, thankfully, you seem to be flattered if the blush on your face is anything to go by.
"I feel terrible," You say," Can I buy your basket for you? As a sorry."
"If you buy my basket," Leila replies as you help her to her feet," Then can I have your number? I'd love to take you out."
You laugh and inwardly, Leila pumps her fist in victory. "Are you trying to pick me up? In a Tesco?"
Leila grins, even though the movement makes her cheek ache. "I've heard that Big Tesco was a magical place but I didn't know that it stocked such beautiful girls like you."
You laugh under your breath. "Oh my god. I hit you with my cart and you're trying to pick me up. I can't believe it."
"I'm Leila," She says with a wink," But you can call me your future girlfriend."
"Wow," You say," You're so forward. Is that because of the pain or just what you're usually like?" You take Leila's basket and put it in your trolley.
"Let me take you on a date and find out."
You grin at her. "I gave you quite a shiner. I hope that you don't hold that against me."
"Trust me," Leila says," I am very happy that you hit me with your trolley."
"It was an accident, truly."
Leila winks. "I wouldn't have minded it if wasn't."
You laugh. "Alright smooth talker. Do you need to get anything else or should we go and pay for it?"
"We can pay now," She says," But if you need longer to make your mind up about me then I'm happy to pretend to need more things."
"You're very charming," You reply, beginning the push your cart to the registers," I've already made my mind up about you." You fish out your phone. "I'm working for the next three days but I'm available at any time after six if you still want to go out."
Leila has to restrain herself from snatching your phone to type in her number so makes sure to take her time (but still ends up wearing a smile that betrays how excited she is).
You do the same with her phone, shyly handing it back. "You should probably go get some ice to put on your bruise. Is it far from your place?"
"My friend's girlfriend is a doctor," Leila confesses," I'm actually heading there now."
"Well," You say, feeling bold and giving her a goodbye kiss on the cheek," I hope she has ice for you. I'd hate for that pretty face of yours to be all black and blue during our date."
You waltz off and Leila stands frozen for several minutes as she watches your retreating figure.
Then, her phone chimes.
It's Deyna, asking where the hell she is.
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mt-oe ¡ 5 months ago
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I’ve just been highly obsessed over modern Mizu. So I’m just asking for that, modern Mizu meets reader at uni or something like that! I love LOVE your writing!! 💖💖
✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧
Hey dear!
Thank you so much for the request! I hope you don't mind if I add a bit more to this <3 I've been wanting to write modern au Mizu hcs and your request really granted me the opportunity to do so.
Also, I'm so sorry for being so slow on the requests. I've been so eepy lately for some reason and I can't fight against it, like I tried but failed so many times ;; I am a slave to my own body
Anyways, I hope you enjoy! Mwa mwa :*
warning/s: not proofread, she/her for mizu, implied afab reader, game reference (league of legends)
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general headcanons
✦ This woman would either overload or underload her units like crazy. She'd either be busy with her academics and work 6 days a week, even sending a letter to the admin so she can go past the mandated maximum amount of units in one semester or doing absolutely nothing while the rest of her friends are going apeshit on their finals. There's no in between.
She would plan it like an absolute psychopath too. Nothing special foreseeably happening in the next semester? She's going above and beyond. A convention she wants to go to on September? Signing up for the bare minimum amount of allowed units just for one event.
Her friends are either concerned for her and losing contact for a whole semester, or are pissed off that she's playing some kind of gacha game on her phone while they're losing their minds on their finals.
✦ Would be the type to be so pissed off by slow walkers in the hallway. The hatred she has for people who walk so fucking slow in the hallway is unbridled. Though she's not the type to pick fights, she'd be the type to sigh loudly, making you feel her anger, before overtaking and wouldn't be afraid to bump against the person if needed. Her hatred goes deep enough to the point where she even remembers people JUST because they walk slow.
✦ The type of friend who would walk to everything. Sure she has her motorbike, but if she can walk to it, you bet she's going to walk. She even knows different shortcuts to different buildings on campus.
"This looks like a good place," Akemi tells them, showing her phone. For once, their vacant hours finally aligned and they've been trying to find a good place to eat since the lunch hall food was getting repetitive and they could feel their taste buds dulling over time. Akemi, being the 'what do you guys want to eat?' friend, and the other three, being the 'I don't know' or the 'I'm fine with whatever' friends, is left to search for a new place.
They took a look at the place and shrugged in agreement, making her roll her eyes at their lack of opinion. "Okay but how are we going to go there?" Taigen asks. Mizu takes Akemi's phone and looks up the map to the place. The distance itself was enough to tell a person that they should take the bus. Hell, it was on the other side of town almost.
"We can walk. It's not that far," she says, closing the map and handing Akemi her phone back. They trusted Mizu. It couldn't be that bad.
Right?
By the time they arrived at the restaurant, they were already sweating, ready to give up, tired out of their wits. The food wasn't even worth it anymore.
"It's not that far" my ass.
Even Taigen, her fellow gym rat and workout buddy, was fucking exhausted. And this bitch (affectionately), has the audacity to stand there, crossing her arms with the most unamused expression on her face as if it was their fault for being so exhausted. If she tells you its walking distance, it is NOT within walking distance.
✦ She's a jack-of-all trades type of person, but she'd have the fattest fucking talent crush on anyone who can express themselves through art. The talents and skills she gathered were purely out of necessity. Fixing and modifying bikes was the only thing she was truly passionate about but it's hard to be expressive through repairing motorbikes, right?
She has always been so amazed by stories of painters, sculptors, singers, and writers who have deep backstories and can reflect it through their art. She would be the type to read the whole description in art museums just because she's so amazed by them.
Deep inside her, she wished she could do that too. To express herself through a medium. Like what do you mean you wrote this poem because you're sad your cat died? Or what do you mean you took this professional-looking picture just because you had the best picnic date with your friends? How can someone write a song about casual sapphic sex? She can't even vocalize her feelings, how much more in art? Whenever she sees someone writing their English essay so well or drawing randomly, she'd secretly be so interested.
✦ Mizu would have social media accounts but would use it bare minimum. She'd be that type of classmate that you're not sure if it's really her because she doesn't have a profile picture you can check or if she does, it's like a picture of an item instead of her face.
Her friends would be so happy whenever Mizu posts an IG story even if it's just a picture of where they were eating or even if their face is barely in the picture.
"Aww you posted us!" and they're like little ants with how small they were in the picture.
Or
"Do you want to eat at that place again?" and she'd be like 'what? why?' but they'd know she actually enjoyed the food because she bothered posting a picture of the place.
Deep inside her, Mizu wants to keep up with whatever trends her friends are into but she's very lowkey about it. The tough love friend who secretly really enjoys being friends, y'know? She'd search about it and try to figure it out. Everyone's surprised by her internet knowledge since she always acts like she wouldn't give a shit whatever new trend is on.
✦ This sounds so corny and stereotypical, but Taigen and her would be those gym rats who solve everything by working out. It didn't matter if it was a weekday, a weekend, a holiday, or whatever weather condition was going on outside, they are going.
They failed a test? Gym. Hungover? Gym. Too much homework? Gym.
When Megan Thee Stallion said she'll go to the gym two times a day, they go three. When she said the results are resulting? The body is bodying? These two are taking it seriously.
Taigen would focus on biceps, chest, and lats, cutting down on fat so his body would look more lean. He'd hate leg day but would do it anyway just to balance out his physique.
Meanwhile, Mizu would have a 'sleeper-type' build and her routine would be more well-rounded and would even include calisthenics on her free time. They'd try to beat each other's PR but it really ain't a competition when Mizu is always winning.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
how did you two meet?
Stupid shitty project.
Stupid fucking publisher gatekeeping the fucking article.
Stupid bitch ass school wifi keeps disconnecting.
Mizu resisted the urge to slam her laptop shut as her device disconnected from the wifi for the nth time. She was stuck in the library trying to finish her midterm project for building design system and holy shit was she frustrated.
She needed to create a specific building design that was supposed to be environmentally friendly, using what was considered as 'green materials' and had minimally destructive designs. It wouldn't be so bad if this fucking publisher just had to put a price on the article she needed. Wasn't education supposed to be free or whatever?
Her friends tried to help her, telling her to use the library computers, but none of them were working or free at the moment. That leaves her to use her laptop in the library. Usually, that wouldn't be a problem but due to the recent rains, the school wifi has been pretty shitty.
After a few more tries, she decided that this wasn't worth the frustration and trouble, and decided to collect her things to get ready to leave. Just as she was about to zip up her bag, a tap on the shoulder stopped her. She turned around to look at who was trying to get her attention, ready to tell them off. But upon turning around, her heart skipped a beat.
There you stood.
In your oh-so fancy sweatpants and college logo hoodie (whose logo wasn't even the university's). Your hair was ruffled and messy, eyes tired and more exhausted than her's. Understandably so though. It was hell week and everyone was tired, but somehow, your tired looked so pretty.
Her eyes continued to stare at you. Like the world stopped moving and it was just you and her in the room.
"Umm...there's a free computer over there if you still need it," you said shyly but in a straightforward manner. A small tired smile on your lips, trying to appear as friendly as possible. Mizu snapped out of her trance and nodded, slinging her bag over her shoulder to move to the said computer.
Maybe she'll stay for a bit. To finish her midterm project.
Definitely not for the pretty lady.
No, of course not.
Upon sitting down, she couldn't help but sneak glances at you, looking back down at the screen when you looked in her direction. She felt stupid, like a lovestruck fool. Borderline, like a child getting their first actual crush.
In her mind, she was already planning how to approach you without making it awkward. Maybe she'll try to strike up a conversation? But how? Hmmm..
It definitely took a while, being distracted and all, but she was finally able to finish her report. Taking a deep breath, she prepared herself mentally to talk to you. She stood up and stretched after logging herself out, pretending to look around the room but in reality she was looking for you.
Much to her dismay, you were no where to be found. A small "fuck" left her lips as she sighed, picking her bag up. The universe must hate her. Giving her an opportunity to see the most beautiful person she's ever seen only for them to leave early? Fuck.
Her thoughts continued to plague her for the rest of the day, even until the next morning. It sounded so silly and so stupid for her to be this bothered, but she really just couldn't forget you. She sighed once again as she stared at the lecture hall walls, face hidden against her palms.
"Excuse me. Do you have an extra pencil?" a voice asked as she felt a tap on her shoulder. Looking up grouchily, her eyes widened immediately.
It was you.
And this time, she wasn't going to let this opportunity pass.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
but what now? (girlfriend headcanons)
✦ Mizu would absolutely remember EVERYTHING about you. Your birthday, MBTI score, favorites, dislikes, and even the silliest things such as what makes you sneeze.
She has a second brain for these, an internal SSD in her brain just for you. You won't even have to remind her about anything, because she already planned it out before you remember.
It's especially great for errands since you don't have to give her a list, she already has a list in her brain. Sometimes, you'd think she forgot because she's so quiet about it but she always finds a way to prove you wrong. If she says she forgot something about you, it's a lie. She never forgets, especially when it comes to her girlfriend.
✦ Would pretend to not understand or know how to do something just so you could teach or show her. Mizu definitely has a lot of skill up her sleeves, but whenever you asked if she knew something that she knew you were good at, she'd pretend not to.
"So I just click like this?" she asked you through the call, clicking on a minion. You had enthusiastically called her, asking if she wanted to learn how to play League of Legends. Unknown to you, your girlfriend already knew how to play and was quite good at it (that's a lie, she's beyond good).
She couldn't help but smile slightly as she watched you nod enthusiastically. The thought of you being so eager to spend time with her was heart-warming. She even made a dummy account just to make her beginner act look believable. "Yeah, you just need to keep this up. So should we queue together?" you asked, sounding really excited.
Mizu chuckled and nodded. "Don't get mad at me, okay?" she joked lightly, accepting your invite. "I won't. I'll be the ADC so you can play support until you get the hang of it, okay?" you said, checking which ADR champions you had cool skins of. Your girlfriend let out a small laugh at your enthusiasm, signaling you to start the queue.
The game went really well. Extremely well.
To your surprise, Mizu was quite a good support. Never accidentally stealing your CS, always being there during a clash, skill shots always hitting, knowing who to focus on. "It's because you're good at teaching people," she said.
But really, you wonder how she knew which items to build when you never even taught her.
✦ Would do the most random or the smallest things for you. She's not good at expressing her feelings so she makes up for it through acts of service and gift giving. Mizu tries her best to be as loving as she can without overwhelming you.
Can you even remember the last time you tied your own shoelaces? You can't. Can you?
Sometimes, you'll be surprised to arrive home with the fridge already stocked even though you had told her that you'll do the groceries on your next day off. The only response you'll get is a shake of her head and a random thing you mentioned you wanted to buy.
Sometimes, she's a bit silly though. Putting in the effort to remove her jacket to shield you from the rain even though you had an umbrella, removing the buckle of your helmet so she'd be the one to put it on you, gifting you random goofy greeting cards.
It's both endearing and a bit funny.
✦ Secretly loves it when you put makeup on her or if you let her do your makeup. Her amazement and fascination skyrockets whenever she watched you put make up on. It was a line of femininity that she was never taught to cross. She'd watch you with deep interest, observing how carefully you did it, how purposeful each step you did was.
"So why do you put it on?" she asks. You hum in thought before shrugging. "It just...makes me feel pretty."
What do you mean it makes you feel pretty?
You were already pretty.
You can't help but laugh at her and her curiosity. "It just does. It feels therapeutic to put on and I like how I look after, it's like expressing myself or something. Like painting but on your face," you explained to her, making her raise an eyebrow.
"But what if you don't like the way it looks?" she asked, picking up your eyeshadow palette and swatching a color on her hand curiously. "I can always take it off," you answered, blending the blush on your cheeks.
She stayed silent for a moment, continuing to swatch the colors on her hand. Her mind still couldn't wrap around the fact that this could make you feel better. Its just color and chemicals, and it washes off too.
Your eyes scanned her face before a soft laugh left your lips. "Here. Want to try?" you offered. Your girlfriend looked a bit hesitant but she wanted to understand.
Was this really fun?
After a few minutes, some struggles and squirming, you finally finished putting some make up on her. You tried your best to make it look as natural and as light as possible, knowing that she wouldn't appreciate the texture of heavy makeup immediately.
Blue eyes scanned over her own face on the mirror. She didn't say anything, but the slight twitch of her lips and the shine in her eyes spoke thousands.
"I want to do it on you too," she said quietly. "At least one thing. Let me try to do it for you."
You heart melted at her excitement. How could you refuse her when she finally finds something she likes? You handed her your eyeliner and sat down. "Here, follow my instructions.."
Mizu actually ended up liking it. Although she enjoyed putting it on you more, she still enjoyed it nonetheless. The amount of practice she put in made you wonder if she was actually better than you now. Somehow, she felt a bit of relief and a bit happy that she finally found something she could do that was considered as 'artistic'.
What started off as a simple "let me try" ended up being part of your routine. This woman never stopped practicing different eyeliner looks and now she just sits on your bed, waiting for you to finish your routine so she can put it on you. Sometimes she'd do a more creative graphic liner look, but on days you had to go to uni or work, she'd do the usual. She could probably do it with her eyes closed.
And the results?
SHARP.
Capital S H A R P.
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bossbtch1 ¡ 1 year ago
Text
Against All Odds part 3 (Final)
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Summary : Bucky's betrayal left you deeply wounded, you sought revenge to make him feel the pain he caused. Following your act of retaliation, you distanced yourself from him despite his numerous attempts to apologize. Instead, you found comfort in Sam, and Bucky couldn't ignore the growing closeness, leaving him seething with jealousy.
Pairing : Bucky Barnes x Reader (No mentions of body type or ethnicity other than the reader being female)
General tags : Smut and Groveling
TW: NSFW, 18+, Strong language, Hurt, Comfort, Groveling, Jealous!Bucky, Unprotected Sex, P in V, Hair pulling, Light Spanking, Breeding kink, Overstimulation
Word Count: 14,5k (So yeah... I'm sorry it has to be this long)
A/N : We've reached the end of the story, and I appreciate your enthusiasm and support for this chapter. Apologies if it turned out to be a lengthy fic; I contemplated splitting it into two chapters but couldn't bring myself to do that to you all.
P.S. I'm trying something new with hyperlinks to provide visualizations for certain scenes. I initially wanted to include them for the smut as well, but it didn't align with Tumblr guidelines, so I kept it PG. Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy the finale!
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
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A week after that when you were running in the treadmill, you saw Bucky trying to approach you. You ignored him and ran faster. "Y/N... Y/N, please! Let me apologize." Bucky's voice could be heard, but it was drowned out by the music in your ears.
You just kept running. You knew Bucky was trying to apologize. "Can't hear you, music too loud!" You yelled.
He didn't give up and said, "Please just give me 5 minutes.”
"I'm busy.”
"Just five minutes. That's all I ask for."
"No." You pressed a button, and the speed of the treadmill increased. You kept running.
He tried one last time, "Please. Just five minutes."
You ignored him. He got the message.
He stood there, watching you run. You were not paying any attention to him, or even acknowledging his presence. The look on his face was pure sadness. He was not going to give up though. Bucky waited until you finished your run, and then asked, "Hey…”
You ignored him and went out. He followed you.
"Y/N. Wait." He said chasing you before you got into the shower, "Doll. I'm sorry. I fucked up big time. I really am. I was stupid. I wasn't thinking."
You didn’t care, you ignored him and went to the shower, hoping he would leave after you taking a shower, but of course he was waiting for you.
When you got out, he was sitting on the couch. You went out there with nothing but a towel on. "Y/N what are you doing? You're going to get cold." He said.
You rolled your eyes, "What do you think I'm doing, Barnes? I just took a shower. Is there a problem with that?"
He shook his head. "No, but you shouldn't be wearing a towel. You should be dressed. You're going catch a cold." He then averted his eyes from your body and stared at the floor.
"I thought you said I looked good without clothes, Barnes." You smirked. "Is there something wrong?"
He shook his head. "Y/N, put some clothes on."
You then walked toward him and sat on his lap, "Y/N what-"
You cut him off by kissing him passionately. His eyes widened in shock, and then closed as he kissed you back. He was confused as you broke the kiss. You then dropped the towel, exposing your naked body to him. He stared at your breast for a second, before looking into your eyes.
"Y/N," he began to speak but stopped. He was stunned, "Y/N what are you doing right now? Why did you take the towel off?"
"Don't you like me naked? Do you not find me attractive, Bucky?" You asked him with a pouty lip.
"Yes. You're very attractive. Of course. But... We shouldn't."
"Why not? We had sex before, why not now?"
"Because... That was before. But now you are angry at me. I'm not going to do that again. I won't take advantage of you. It's not right."
"Don't worry about it Bucky." You got closer to him, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Come on Bucky. I want you. Don't you want me?” You said, moving closer until your lips were inches apart.
He swallowed hard, staring into your eyes. "You're not in your right mind. You're not thinking straight.” He could feel himself getting hard. His resolve was breaking. "Doll, please. You know I want you, but I need to know that are we good? I can't have you and leave. It would kill me."
You smirked at him, "We are good." You said seductively, "For now." You whispered, biting his earlobe gently.
He groaned as his cock hardened at your words. "Doll…” He swallowed hard, looking into your eyes.
"Are you going to give me what I want?" You asked.
"If... If that's what you want. Then, yes."
"Then prove it to me. Kiss me."
He hesitated, but leaned forward and kissed you. His lips were soft and warm. You deepened the kiss, moaning softly as you felt his tongue slip between your parted lips. Your hands moved to his shirt, pulling it off. You threw his shirt on the floor and your hands found their way to his belt. You undid his pants and pulled them down, letting his dick spring out.
You reached for his cock and stroked him slowly. He moaned, bucking his hips forward. "Fuck, doll." He breathed.
"You like that, Buck?" You asked.
He nodded. "Yes, so much."
You then positioned yourself above his cock. "You want this?" You teased him, rubbing his cock against your entrance.
"Fuck, doll." He groaned. "I want this."
You smirked. You then sink down on him slowly, taking in every inch of him. He grunted, his hands gripping your hips tightly. "Oh fuck. That's it. Fuck. You feel so good, doll."
You rode him, grinding your hips. "Oh, god." You moaned. He started to thrust into you, groaning. You rode him, picking up the pace. You started riding him as fast as you could. He grunted, his grip on your hips tightening. He started thrusting in and out of you, faster and harder. You were also meeting his thrusts, moaning and whimpering. You pulled his hair, making him moan loudly.
He hit your sweet spot and you were screaming his name. He kept hitting your g-spot. You were getting close. He kept thrusting, faster and harder.
"Fuck, doll. You're so fucking tight. I love how your pussy clenches around me. You're so hot." He pulled your head toward him to kissed you but you denied his lips. You threw your head back, moaning loudly.
"Oh, fuck! Yes! Oh my god!" You screamed, riding him faster. "I'm close. So close."
He reached between your legs, rubbing your clit. You were on the edge, and you needed just a little more to push you over. He rubbed your clit, faster and faster. "Bucky, I'm gonna come!" You cried out.
"Yes, come on my cock. Come for me."
And you came, screaming his name. Your orgasm triggered his. He came, shooting his load inside you. He grunted, thrusting hard. "Holy fuck." He moaned, still thrusting. "You're amazing."
You collapsed onto his chest, panting, wrapping his arms around your waist. Then after you caught your breath, you unwrapped his arms from you and got off him. You rolled your eyes and he was confused. "You didn't let me kiss you earlier, what happened doll? Are you mad at me or something? Did I do something wrong?" he asked, pulling on his boxers and sitting up.
You ignored his questions and stood up, reaching for your scattered clothes. "Y/N, what's wrong?" he pressed, his tone laced with worry.
You smirked at him, "Thanks for that, I needed it." You had taken revenge on using him.
Bucky stood there, stunned and feeling utterly foolish. He couldn't believe he had allowed you to manipulate him like that. "You said we're good..." he protested weakly, his voice filled with hurt and confusion.
Your response was cold and calculated, "Yeah, I said 'we're good for now,' which was then and not right now. So, I got what I needed from you." You didn't spare him a glance as you began to dress, your movements swift. "We're done here." You made a move to leave, but Bucky seized your arms, his grip tight and desperate.
"You're not leaving this room, not until you tell me why the hell you just did that." His eyes pleaded for an explanation, the hurt etched in his features tearing at your resolve. For a fleeting moment, a pang of guilt flickered within you, but you swiftly brushed it aside. "Y/N, stop. You can't just use me for sex," he implored.
A bitter laugh escaped your lips as you met his gaze head-on. "I can, and I did. Now, let go of me," you retorted, pushing him away with unyielding determination.
His eyes were now full of anger and disbelief. "So all this time, you were just acting? Pretending to be okay with me? Pretending that you've forgiven me? All this time, you didn't actually forgive me?!"
"Ha! Please, when did I said I forgive you? What do you think I am? A fool? You don't get to act like the victim here. It's your fault!” You yelled at him.
"You don't think I know that?! I fucked up, Y/N. I made a mistake and I'm sorry.” Running his hand through his hair. “What the fuck!"
"What do you mean 'what the fuck'? It's what you did to me! You fucked me and threw me out. What's wrong with me doing the same to you?" You scoffed, crossing your arms.
"You can't do that, Y/N…"
"I can't do that? I can't do the exact thing you did to me? That's rich, Barnes." He stayed quiet. He didn't have anything to say because he knew you were right.
"How does it feel, Barnes? Fucking hurt, doesn't it?" You said staring at his face. You wanted him to hurt just like how you did, you wanted to hurt him. He flinched, his jaw clenching. You were glad he was in pain, it gave you satisfaction. You wanted him to suffer.
He stared at you, his blue eyes filled with pain. You ignored it and started walking toward the door.
"Wait! Y/N please. Don't go. Stay." He pleaded as he grabbed your arm, "I... I was a jerk. I was scared and stupid. And... I was a fool, I don't want this to be over…” He said while looking into your eyes with his blue orbs. “Please, Y/N, just let me fix this…”
"I wish it were that simple. But it's not. It's too late. I guess we were doomed from the start." You said and ripped your arm from his grasp. “You don't get to hold me anymore. Don't ever come near me again. I mean it." You said sternly.
He stood there, tears welling up in his eyes, helpless and uncertain, fully aware that he had messed up beyond repair.
You couldn't stand the sight of Bucky, it broke your heart as much you hate to admit it. It took all your self-control not to run into his arms and hug him. But you had to stand your ground, he hurt you and you had to show him how much it affected you.
You turned around and walked away, then you heard glass shattering behind you. You didn't have to look back to know that the mirror had broken. Bucky had punched the mirror in his anger and frustration.
You walked out of the door, slamming it behind you.
And with that, you left him standing there, alone and broken.
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Couple weeks after that you avoided Bucky like a plague. You were trying to forget about him and move on with your life. You never look at him and whenever he was near you, you would use every excuse to walk away or leave the room. If you were stuck in a situation where you had to interact with him, you kept it professional and didn't engage in any unnecessary conversation. Your relationship with Bucky had always been strained right from the beginning, making it no surprise to the other Avengers. So, your growing distance and avoidance tactics went unnoticed.
Bucky was trying his best to keep his distance from you, far enough so you would be comfortable but close enough so he could make sure that you were safe. You knew he was still trying to apologize and fix things with you. You didn't understand why he was doing this, his words, his touch, the way he's looking at you. You didn't need his apology, didn't want his sympathy. You didn't need him. Not now.
Every time he saw you, he would always try to catch your eye, but you never looked back. It was a little hard at first, since he had to see you almost every day, but as time went by, you guys had less interaction because of missions.
Now you were allowed back into the mission field and you were craving it. It took your mind off Bucky and it helped you forget about him.
You didn't need him in your life.
You wanted nothing to do with him.
But he wanted everything to do with you.
He was desperate.
You had no room in your life for someone who couldn't decide where you stood. The push and pull was exhausting, the mixed signals maddening. You also have gotten your revenge, you should feel satisfied. But you weren't. Why weren't you happy?
After awhile you were back on your normal self and started to move on, not because you stopped caring, but you didn't feel the constant heartache anymore. You could think about Bucky and not start crying or break into a cold sweat.
Meanwhile, Wanda shared the news that the gifts for Vision had been a success. While you were genuinely happy for them, you couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy deep down.
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One day after a long mission, you were watching TV in the common area when you saw the three musketeers walking towards you. They were laughing and talking. You paid them no attention and just kept watching TV.
Sam was the first to greet you, his friendly smile easing some of the tension within you. "Fancy seeing you here, YN. It's been a while." He settled down beside you, and you scooted over to give him more space, returning his smile.
You smiled, it had been awhile since you saw them, you were actually starting to miss him. You knew it wasn’t their fault what happened between you and Bucky, so you didn't treat him differently.
You were glad to see Sam again, he was the only one that was acting the same around you. Bucky looked over at your direction, and when you saw him you looked away from him.
"Yeah. Been going on missions with Nat." You replied, attempting to keep the conversation casual.
Sam leaned in a bit, "How's that going for you?"
"Really well. I'm learning a lot. Nat is amazing. She taught me some of those moves too. Not as great as hers, but good enough to defend myself," you responded, appreciating the opportunity to share a positive aspect of your life.
"Nice." Sam smiled.
Taking a seat on the chair next to the couch, Steve turned to you with a warm smile. "How are you holding up, Y/N?" Steve asked, you knew he was asking about your emotional well-being.
"Fine," you gave him a little smile.
The room descended into awkward silence. The three men were making an effort to engage in conversation, but your discomfort hung heavy in the air. You didn't want to be mean or rude to them; after all, they had done nothing wrong. But being around Bucky felt almost unbearable, a constant reminder of a painful past.
“We're here for you. If you ever feel like talking, we're all ears." Steve offered gently. "If you want to talk about it, of course. If not, that’s totally fine too."
Bucky tried to intervene, sensing that you were about to share something he might not want to hear. "Steve, don't—"
You felt a surge of frustration, and despite Bucky's warning, you decided to share your pain, partly to hurt him back. "Well, there was this one person," you began.
"Well, there was this one person..” You started, cutting Bucky off. You decided to share your pain, partly to hurt him back, staring at Bucky.
Bucky clenched his jaw and averted his gaze. You saw a flicker of pain in his eyes.
Sam chimed in, "There's always someone.”
"Okay, the truth is that I met a guy." You rolled your eyes, trying to mask your vulnerability with a dismissive tone. "It turns out, he wasn’t the person I thought he was. I thought he liked me, and, well…"
Sam prodded, "Well what?"
"He didn't like me. It was all a joke to him." You paused for dramatic effect, locking eyes with Bucky. "The guy was so cold-hearted, he even admitted that he used me, that I was just a mistake." Your words were pointed, meant to hurt, and your gaze bore into Bucky as you sought to inflict the same pain, he had caused you.
Sam was visibly uncomfortable. Steve's face fell. Bucky stared at the floor, his fists clenched.
"Oh. That's... that's unfortunate. I'm sorry. Are you alright?" Steve asked gently, concern etched in his voice.
"Yes. I'll be fine. It's not the end of the world. I mean, it hurts. But I'll live." You answered.
Sam's expression twisted into a mix of anger and empathy. "That's beyond messed up. If I were there, I would beat him up."
"Yeah," you replied, your tone bitter. "But, don’t worry I already paid him back.”
Bucky looked guilty, his expression mirroring the remorse he felt. He shifted uncomfortably, his gaze dropping to the floor. He stayed silent, stayed silent, fully aware of the pain he had inadvertently caused you.
“Nice! This is why I like you, Y/N!” Sam nodded in understanding. "So, what's your plan now?"
"Moving on," you replied, your voice steady. "I don't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing me sad."
"Good call," Sam said, his tone filled with assurance. "You're amazing, Y/N. Whoever ends up with you will be incredibly lucky. He doesn't deserve your attention. And here's the best part: when you find someone better and move on, he'll be left regretting ever hurting you. That, my friend, is the sweetest revenge."
You nodded, touched by his supportive words. "Thanks, Sam. You're the best."
The atmosphere gradually shifted back to normal as you grabbed a beer to pregame before Tony's party. However, you kept avoiding Bucky's gaze, your responses becoming short and distant.
While Steve was talking with Bucky, Sam leaned closer, his voice low as he whispered into your ear, "Maybe what you ordered worked after all."
You pulled away from him, narrowing your eyes in confusion. "What do you mean?"
Sam smirked knowingly, "You know what I mean," he whispered back, his tone playful and suggestive.
"No, I don't." Your confusion deepened, genuinely puzzled by his words. You hadn't ordered anything, so what was he talking about?
The realization struck you suddenly, and you smacked his thigh in disbelief. "You did not!" The shock in your voice echoed around the room, leaving everyone stunned by your reaction.
Sam laughed heartily, "What? What did I do?" He feigned innocence, grinning mischievously.
"Come on, Sam, stop teasing her," Steve chimed in, giving Sam an amused yet admonishing look.
"I swear, man, I wasn't," Sam protested with a chuckle.
Natasha, always one to read between the lines, chimed in, appearing out of nowhere. "We all know you enjoy teasing the girl."
Sam looked genuinely surprised. "Damn, Nat, can you please not sneak up on me? I almost had a heart attack."
Natasha simply smirked, her response dripping with amusement. "You'll be fine." Her nonchalant remark only fueled the laughter in the room, leaving you momentarily flustered.
You were about to press Sam with more questions, but he managed to divert the conversation, addressing Natasha instead. "When's the party starting, Nat?" His timing seemed convenient, clearly trying to avoid further interrogation.
Natasha checked at her watch and then back at the group, "In about an hour or so, but I need to go now. I have some things to finish."
Ever the gentleman, Sam promptly stood up. "I'll help you, Nat," he offered, his tone earnest.
"That's sweet of you, Sam. Maybe I can find you a girl that likes bird costumes." She joked and the group laughed.
"Funny." Sam said sarcastically, then they walked away.
"Sam!" You called after him, but he continued walking, seemingly ignoring you. Frustration bubbling within, you raised your voice, "Get back here!"
Feeling the heat of embarrassment rise in your cheeks, you huffed in annoyance and sank back into your seat. The room fell into an awkward silence, and you shifted uncomfortably under the watchful gaze of Steve and Bucky.
You met their eyes, "What?" you snapped, but they only exchanged a subtle glance, their expressions unreadable.
Deciding you had had enough, you stood up abruptly. "Alright, I'm going as well. I need to start getting ready," you announced, trying to sound composed despite your frustration.
Bucky made a move to follow you, but Steve quickly caught his arm, holding him back. "No," Steve whispered, his voice barely audible. "Don't, not yet."
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Time for the party, it was to celebrate the mission succeed. Tony arrived with Pepper, Wanda, and Vision. Then soon everyone gathered. He was keeping the party small though, only Avengers and close friends. It was a small party though.
In the midst of the party, as people bustled around grabbing food and chatting, you discreetly pulled Sam aside. "Did you know the inside of it?" you whispered.
Sam simply looked at you with a mischievous smile, "Umm no?" Sam teased, his grin widening.
Frustration tugged at you. "Ugh, come on, Sam. Just spill it," you urged.
He chuckled, enjoying your perplexity. "Yes, Y/N, guilty as charged. I was the one who accepted the delivery," he confessed, his tone lighthearted. Your playful annoyance was evident as you lightly hit his chest. "You weren't there. You've been MIA for the past couple of weeks.”
"Oh my god, Sam, you're a dick," you groaned, shaking your head at his antics. "That's rude, you shouldn't snoop around people's packages. It's an invasion of privacy."
"It wasn't on purpose, okay?" Sam defended himself, his grin unyielding. "I can read where it's from, and you don't need to be a genius to guess what's inside. So, yeah, I knew. And you know, it was really interesting to see the stuff you ordered," he teased, clearly enjoying your embarrassment. You just want to dig a hole and bury yourself.
As you both grabbed food together, you shot him a warning glare. "I'm sorry, Y/N. Don't worry, my lips are sealed," he assured, trying to be serious but failing to hide his amusement.
"It better be. If you tell anyone, I will kill you," you growled, half-joking but also dead serious.
"So, any plans with it?" he asked, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.
"Sam," you warned him, your cheeks burning with embarrassment.
"Just saying. It's a very interesting device. It has so many settings and functions. It would make things easier," he continued, unable to resist teasing you further. "I'm sure it would come in handy," Sam chuckled, taking a bite of his food.
Your eyes widened in disbelief, feeling embarrassed. “Shut up," you hissed, wanting to hide and disappear, not knowing what else to say.
“Any guy would love it. If you know what I mean," he added, nudging you playfully and making you blush even more.
"You are making me uncomfortable," you whined, pouting like a child. "I am not talking to you anymore," you mumbled.
"Okay, okay, I'm sorry," he said, holding up his hands in surrender. “It's perfectly normal. Don't be shy," he said, his words meant to be comforting but the smug smirk on his face was anything but. You groaned, wishing the earth would swallow you up right then and there. Dropping your face in your hands, hiding behind them.
“How did you know it was for me? I could've bought it as a present for a friend or family. And, you can't just accept someone else's package."
"Because you wrote your name on it," Sam pointed out, his expression playful. "You could've used a random name if it was meant to be a secret. And come on, I was the only one there. What was I supposed to tell the delivery guy? 'Hey, this package isn't mine, can you go back to the warehouse, please?'"
Taking a bite of your food, you couldn't help but chuckle at his logic. He had a way of making even the most awkward situations seem amusing.
Sam chuckled, taking a sip of his drink. "So, you bought sex toys and lingerie as a present?"
You were about to answer him when Tony dinked the glass and said, "Hello everyone, thanks for coming here." He paused as everyone clapped. "Let's raise our glasses for all of us, may we have a great year." Everyone raised their glass and cheered.
Before everyone drink, Tony stopped us "Not you kid." He pointed at Peter, "You're not allowed to have alcohol, go drink some soda."
"Aww come on, Mr. Stark. I’m not a kid anymore." Peter protested, attempting to sound mature.
"No, and don't complain or I'll kick you out."
“Fine.” Peter rolled his eyes but left to grab a soda.
You smiled as you saw Pepper leaning against Tony's side. They looked happy. You couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy at their public display of affection. You wanted that with Bucky. You sighed, looking down at the drink in your hand.
You were sitting between Sam and Bruce. Bruce was quiet most of the time and Sam kept talking to you and Bruce. You had fun and the food was great. You didn't really drink that much, you just had two or three drinks.
Across from you, Bucky's glances were hard to ignore. His expression was far from cheerful, but you relished in his irritation. Seizing the opportunity, you continued to emphasize your closeness with Sam, subtly trying to provoke Bucky.
Sam tapped you and leaned in again to whispered, "You still haven't answered my question."
You shot him a playful grin. "Didn't know you were so curious, Sam. Besides, I don't feel obligated to reveal my secrets."
"TouchĂŠ, Y/N, touchĂŠ," Sam replied, a smirk playing on his lips. " But come on, humor a man, will you?"
"Alright, how about this? I bought it for a friend," you responded casually. “They're just really shy about it."
Sam raised an eyebrow, a teasing glint in his eye, "Oh yeah, and does this friend have a name?"
"They do, but I don't have to tell you everything," you said with a smile.
Sam nodded, and smiled back, "You're right, you don't." You saw Bucky sat in front of you, looking like he was about to kill someone. You smirked on the inside, knowing it was working. "I'll tell you something though, they're pretty lucky to have a friend like you."
"Well, I am the best." You winked at Sam.
He was going to say something when the two of you were interrupted. "I need to talk to you," Bucky growled at Sam.
"I'm in the middle of a conversation, can't it wait?"
"No," Bucky responded, glaring at him.
You knew Bucky was jealous, you could tell by the look in his eyes, and you liked it. You smirked, "Yeah, Barnes. Don't be rude, you're interrupting us."
Bucky looked at you, and he could tell by the look in your eye, that you knew what you were doing, and were enjoying it. He clenched his jaw and staring at you.
Sam smiled, "It's fine, I have to use the bathroom anyway. Talk to you later?"
You nod, smiling at him, "Sure thing, Sam."
He got up, and you watched as he and Bucky walked to the other side of the room, talking quietly. You wished you knew what they were saying, but you had a feeling that it was about you.
"That was interesting," Wanda said, making you look at her.
"What do you mean? It was nothing."
She smirked, "You're an awful liar, and I can tell when you're trying to make a certain someone jealous."
"Is it that obvious?"
"Just a bit." Wanda smiled. "But he deserved it, he was being a dick to you, so you can have a little fun."
"Exactly."
"But remember, don't let it go too far."
You nodded, looking back at them. They were still talking, but Sam had his back to you, so you couldn't see his expression. Then he turned around and walked back towards you.
"Hey, I gotta go. Thanks for the chat, I'll talk to you later."
You smiled and said, "Oh where are you going? We could hang out more."
"I have work to do."
"On a Saturday?"
"Yes, the glamorous life of an Avenger," Sam quipped.
You sighed dramatically, a playful pout forming on your lips. "Fine, have fun saving the world."                  
"Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Sam winked at you.
You scoffed, "Please, I’m not a child."
"Whatever you say," Sam said, laughing as he walked away.
Rolling your eyes, you let out a sigh, focusing on your drink. It was clear that Bucky had a hand in this – he was the only one with any issue against Sam. But it seemed to work, because as soon as you started talking to Sam, you could see the anger in Bucky's eyes. You ignored him.
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As the night wore on, the music grew louder, and the crowds began to dance. It was a great party. You were sitting at the bar, drinking a glass of whiskey. You didn't feel like dancing or partying, you didn't have the energy to do it.
You turned around and caught a glimpse of Steve and Bruce dancing with Wanda and Natasha. Then Bucky came beside you, his eyes focused on something. He was leaning against the counter, his back to you. A sigh escaped your lips, and you rolled your eyes discreetly, wondering why he continued to linger around you.
He finally glanced over his shoulder, his blue eyes meeting yours, and he offered you a small smile. Just as you contemplated leaving, Bucky spoke up, "I see you're getting comfortable with Sam."
Not in the mood for an argument, you nonchalantly shrugged and responded, "He's a good friend."
Bucky's voice lowered, and he muttered, "A little too friendly, don't you think?"
You met his intensity with a nonchalant attitude, taking another sip of your whiskey. "So?"
"What do you mean, 'so'?" Bucky's frown deepened. "Can't you see? He's flirting with you and you flirted back. He’s all over you."
"And?"
"Why would you do that?!" He asked.
"I believe that's none of your concern, Barnes." You continued to sip your drink, maintaining your composure.
"I care about you," Bucky said quietly.
You snorted, turning your attention back to your glass.
Bucky shifted in his seat, turning to face you. He placed his hand on top of yours, causing you to flinch. "I mean it, Y/N. And Sam is my friend.”
Then you raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "Am I not allowed to be friends with him? I don't have any problem with him."
Bucky's jaw clenched, his frustration boiling over, "Look, Y/N. You and Sam are getting very close. Friends don't do that. Do you know how he looked at you?"
A mischievous glint lit up your eyes as you prodded, "Oh, how is it? Tell me."
"Like he's about to jump you anytime," Bucky replied, his tone tense with disapproval.
"Is that a bad thing, Barnes?" you teased, your smile intentionally provocative, knowing it irked him.
"Of course, it is," Bucky snapped, his patience wearing thin.
You couldn't help but chuckle, finding his jealousy rather entertaining. As Bucky's patience wore thin, he snapped, "This is no laughing matter."
"Sure it is," you retorted, your voice light and teasing. "Why even care? You made it clear that it was just a heat-of-the-moment thing. So, perhaps I’ll fuck him next. It seems like he's interested." Casually, you finished your drink and set the empty glass on the counter. "Thanks for the heads-up." You turned to leave, but his hand shot out to your wrist, stopping you from getting up. Your gaze flickered between the metal hand and his eyes.
"The fuck you won’t." Bucky's voice was low, his expression hard, his jaw clenched tightly. “If he touches you, I’ll break his arm."
Instantly, you yanked your hand away, your eyes narrowing in defiance. "Don't touch me," you warned, your voice sharp with anger, setting a clear boundary against his possessiveness.
Bucky's blue eyes flashed with anger, his fists clenched at his sides. "Don’t fucking touch him. Or anyone.” He leaned closer to you, your body tense. “Because, I'm the only one who should touch you," he growled, his voice low and dangerous.
You met his glare head-on. "And why would I do that? So you can break my heart again? No thanks. I'm not a toy that you can play with, and discard when you're bored.”
Bucky clenched his jaw, and grabbed your arms, pushing you against the counter. "No, I don't want to see you with him. You're mine."
With an exasperated sigh, you held his gaze, your patience wearing thin. You didn't want to continue this game of emotional tug-of-war. "Let me remind you, Barnes," you said, your voice steady but firm, "Last I check, we're not boyfriend and girlfriend. You made it very fucking clear that I was a mistake and you used me.”
You attempted to leave, but Bucky's grip on your arm tightened, pulling you closer. His touch sent an electric jolt through you, "Last I check, you belong to me when you were begging and squirming as I fucked you, doll. I can make you forget him, I can fuck you better than him. I'll show you how a man fucks his woman, doll."
His words sent a shiver down your spine and you could feel your core pulsed. Goddamn it, why did he have this effect on you. Despite the undeniable physical reaction, you mentally reinforced your resolve.
“Nope. I learned my lesson. And did you forget about what I said to you? Don’t go near me," you replied nonchalantly. "Now if you'll excuse me." You tugged at your hand, wanting to break free, but he held fast.
He held your hand and pulled you back to him. "No," he said simply.
"Yeah, well, I'm done taking orders from you," you shot back, refusing to back down, though your heart raced in your chest.
"I'm not letting you be with him, Y/N," Bucky asserted, his voice low and possessive.
"That decision isn't yours to make," you declared, avoiding his gaze, aware that meeting his eyes might shatter your resolve.
"Why? What's the problem, Y/N?" he pressed, his frustration evident.
"Are you seriously asking me that?” You glared at him, “YOU'RE THE PROBLEM! YOU ARE THE FUCKING PROBLEM BUCKY!" You yelled and his grip loosened, and you pulled away from him. You didn't care that the room had fallen silent, with everyone's attention now focused on your heated exchange. Unfazed by the sudden silence, you continued, "I'm tired of your excuses, your indecision, and your damn games. It's always one step forward and two steps back with you. I told you I’m done!"
"So you're done with me, and now you have Sam, so you'll follow him around?" Bucky's words were laced with bitterness and jealousy. "Who's next, huh? Steve? He's Captain America; you should fuck at him instead, climb him like a tree. Or better yet, maybe you can do all of us. Let us have a go."
Regret instantly washed over him as he realized how hurtful his words had been. "I'm really sorry," he began, "I didn't mean—"
But it was too late. Your anger boiled over, and without thinking, your hand flew across his face, the sharp sound of the slap echoing in the room. "What did I do for you to treat me like this?" you demanded.
"Is it because I joined the team because of my connection with Fury?" Your tone cut through the air like a razor. "I worked for this for years. I’ve fought, bled, sacrificed, and pushed myself to the limits, all to be an Avenger. I earned my place, damn it. Do I not deserve it? Why are you punishing me? Fucking tell me!”
You were beyond caring about the eyes fixed on the unfolding drama. 'Let them gossip,' you thought bitterly, your focus solely on the man before you.
“Sorry that life was hard on you, but don’t make it hard for anyone else either," you continued, "No, you know what? I'm not sorry. Life is shit sometimes, and that's just how it is. You have a right to be upset and have feelings, Barnes. But the way you treat people, the way you treat me like trash, that's not okay. It's not fair, and I won't stand for it any longer."
His jaw tensed, and for a moment, it seemed like he wanted to say something. But you didn't give him the chance. "Oh, my bad. Feeling is a foreign word to you, right? Maybe they died when you fell off that train in the '40s."
He could only watch as tears welled up in your eyes, as his mouth moved but no words came out. He was speechless. He couldn't say anything, only guilt was evident on his face.
"Or maybe you forgot how they work. Since you been the Winter Soldier for so long, your emotions are a bit rusty. How does one even deal with feelings and shit when they're programmed to not have them? When they're forced to kill, hurt, and torture innocent people.”
Your tone was merciless, and you instantly regretted your words as you saw the hurt flash across Bucky's face. But you couldn’t stop, the dam had burst, unable to halt the torrent of pent-up frustration.
“They turn you into a weapon. Is that who you are, Barnes? A weapon, a monster without a soul. You've lost all your feelings, all that remains is a cold-blooded, heartless killer. The Winter fucking Soldier.” Your words spat out.
His jaw clenched, and his hands formed fists, his usual rage replaced by a profound sadness. "You’re right… I'm nothing but a monster..."
Steve stepped forward, trying to mediate the escalating tension. "Come on, guys, let's all just take a moment to cool down," Steve said, attempting to diffuse the situation.
You couldn't help but roll your eyes at his predictable attempt to intervene between you both. "Oh, no, Steve, there's no need to cool down," you retorted, "because there's no fire, except for the flames of my rage. Your best friend here is the one who started the fire."
"Y/N-" Bucky tried to say something, but his words trailed off, lost in the thickness of the charged atmosphere.
“I thought there was more to you than just the Winter Soldier, but every time I see you, you prove me wrong." But your fury was uncontainable, and you turned to face Bucky again, your eyes ablaze with righteous anger. "Stay the fuck away from me, Barnes. Don't come near me. Don't talk to me. Don't even fucking look at me."
Feeling the weight of your anger and frustration, you turned abruptly and rushed towards the exit. You were done, utterly fed up, unable to bear it any longer. Unbeknownst to you, tears slipped down your cheeks. With a swift motion, you wiped away the tears, refusing to let them further betray your vulnerability.
As you strode through the streets, lost in your thoughts, you found your mind drifting back to a time when Bucky had attempted to apologize. You were still so mad at him for what he'd done, you were not going to forgive him any time soon.
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One night, you were sitting on the sofa in the common room, trying to focus on your book, when the door opened. You saw Bucky coming in and he stopped dead on his tracks when he saw you. You immediately got up, wanting to leave before things got bad.
But, of course, Bucky couldn't keep his mouth shut. "Hey, doll, how are you?"
You didn't answer, grabbing your book and trying to walk away.
He followed you, "Doll, can we talk?"
You were already walking down the hall when he said that, "I don't have anything to say."
"Then just listen, please." Bucky almost begged,
You stopped, sighing and rolling your eyes. You turned around, and crossed your arms, not wanting him to come near you. "I don't have to." You walked faster to your room.
"Please I'll do anything, just let me apologize, I'm begging you!" Bucky was following you still,
You turned around, "Why would I want you to do anything with you? Just leave me alone." You said, turning around and continuing walking.
"C'mon, Doll, I know you hate me, but let me apologize and explain myself.” Bucky said,
You didn't even bother looking at him and kept walking faster.
"Doll, just please," Bucky was starting to get desperate.
You got into your room and locked the door. He knocked couple of times but you ignored him. You put on your headphone and blasted the music. You could hear Bucky banging the door. You were ignoring him until he didn't go away. You turned the volumes up to a deafening level and tried to drown out his voice.
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The memory dissolved abruptly as you felt a hand on your wrist, your reflexes primed for confrontation. You whipped around, ready to hit the person behind you, but the person behind you caught your fist. Your eyes flashed with anger.
"What the fuck do you want? Why are you still following me?" you seethed, your voice dripping with contempt. "Fuck off. You're the last person I want to see right now."
Bucky tightened his grip on your wrist, his eyes pleading with sincerity. "I'm so sorry. I know that's not enough, and it doesn't make it better, but I need you to understand how truly sorry I am. I can't bear the thought of losing you."
You scoffed, "Yeah, sure. Tell that to someone else.” you retorted, your tone laced with bitterness. "I'm sick of hearing apologies." You attempted to pull away, but he held firm.
"I meant it, Y/N." Bucky insisted, his voice earnest. "I'm telling the truth. I'm an idiot, and I made a stupid decision. I'm trying my best to make up for it."
"Go," you demanded, your voice breaking as your frustration boiled over. "I don't want to see you. Just leave me alone."
"Y/N, please…" Bucky persisted, his voice laced with desperation. He walked beside you, oblivious to the curious gazes from passersby. You stared around, people started to recognize him since he was the famous Winter Soldier. Even when he was wearing casual clothes, and not in his Winter Soldier uniform, his metal arm still drew attention.
You walked faster, wanting to get away from him. But he was faster. You didn’t want people to notice that the infamous Winter Soldier was following you, so you stopped. "Just leave me alone!" you yelled, your anger fueling your words.
As soon as you yelled, the bystanders gasped and started whispering amongst themselves. The last thing you needed was more drama and attention toward you. Embarrassment washed over you, and you turned to run, desperate to escape the public scrutiny. Bucky matched your every step. He reached out and grasped your hand, refusing to let you go.
In an attempt to break free, you fought against his hold, muscles straining with the effort. "Let go of me, Buck!" you protested, attempting to wrench yourself away from him. The crowd around you seemed to blur into a background hum as your focus remained solely on Bucky.
"Not until we settle this," he replied, his voice low and intense, his fingers tightening around your arms.
Your glare deepened, frustration boiling over. "There's nothing to settle here, Barnes. Now, let go of me. Before I make you," you warned, your tone sharp with anger and defiance.
A stubborn glint flickered in his eyes. "No." His grip tightened slightly, his jaw clenched with resolve. "Make me, Y/N," he challenged, his voice steady. "I know you're strong, so make me."
In a surge of frustration, you summoned all your strength and pushed against him with all your might. Bucky stumbled backward, losing his balance, and fell to the ground.
You stood over him, your voice laced with defiance. "There," you panted, your chest heaving with emotion, "I did it. I hope you're happy."
Bucky remained silent, but the bystanders, their eyes wide with disbelief, started recording the scene with their phones, capturing the unexpected sight of you standing tall over the fallen Winter Soldier. The urge to smash their phones surged within you, but you resisted, your focus solely on the man at your feet.
"Well, I'm going. You're making a scene,” you declared, taking your first steps away from the growing commotion.
"I just want to talk, doll." He got up.
"And I don’t wanna listen." Yet Bucky, refusing to let you go that easily, got up and followed after you, his footsteps echoing behind you. Your patience wearing thin, you spun around, your eyes ablaze with anger. "Stop following me you creep!"
Having had enough, Bucky seized you and pulled you into a nearby alley. He pinned your arms against the wall, a conflicted look in his eyes. "Let me go," you growled, straining to break free from his firm hold.
"You know that I can't. I won't.” Bucky replied, his voice tinged with remorse.
A surge of panic gripped you, "If you don't, I'll scream." Your threat to scream hanging in the air.
You were about to let out a piercing cry when Bucky swiftly placed his hand over your mouth. "Don't scream. Please," he implored, his eyes pleading with you. "I'm sorry. I don't want to hurt you."
In response, you bit down on his hand, but he didn’t flinch. "I know you're furious. You have every right to be. But I’m truly sorry.” Bucky's words poured out, sincere and raw. "Please just give me time to explain everything."
You maintained your glare, your eyes brimming with tears you refused to shed. And finally, Bucky released his grip on your mouth and hands, taking a step back, giving you room to breathe. His voice softened, carrying the weight of his regret. "Listen to me. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have treated you like that. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it.”
You tried to push him away, but he wouldn't budge, not that it did anything, the metal arm didn't even move. His eyes were begging, and he looked sincere, you wanted to believe him, but you couldn't.
"Go to hell! I hate you!" The dam finally broke, tears spilling over. You felt weak and vulnerable, consumed by anger and hurt. You then hit his chest, "I hate you!" Hit it again, "You're the worst!" Hit it again, "You fucking hurt me!"
You hammered his chest repeatedly to vent out. Bucky stood there, unmoved, letting you vent your rage on him. You were crying hard at this point. You were upset that he saw you like this, looking weak.
Then you felt tired emotionally, you stopped hitting him as you realized what a mess you're becoming. Your hands hurt because you were hitting him too much. He grabbed your wrists, "Doll you are hurting yourself, stop pushing me.. don't hurt yourself."
"You did it first! You hurt me, you broke my heart." You continued pushing him, "let go of me, please." You started crying harder, you couldn't see because of the tears and your head was throbbing.
You dropped down your gaze to the ground not wanting to see his face. You didn't know why he was acting like this, you were so fed up. "I don't want to see your face, Barnes. I can't believe you had the audacity to still show up in front of me. When you know that you're a horrible person who doesn't deserve to be forgiven."
He let go of your arms and you wanted to push him away but you were so tired, so exhausted. He placed his hand beside your head caging you in, you knew he was staring at you. "I know… I'm a monster. I know I didn't deserve you. I'm sorry… for everything."
You stayed silent and just crying, your heart aching at the memories. It was so painful.
"I don't expect you to forgive me, but I just wanted you to know. But I'm so sorry. I didn't mean any of the things I said. I'm the monster, not you. You're everything good and I'm nothing." You continued to stay silent not wanting to give in.
You couldn't hold your emotions in anymore, so you just cried. He wiped your tears from your eyes and you shook your head not wanting him to touch you, you hated it, you hated that he was here. He sighed and removed his hand from your face.
You felt like he deserved it, he hurt you, and you want him to feel the pain. He stepped back a few steps, giving you space. "I'm sorry for hurting you, Doll." He apologized, "I'm a fucking asshole and a coward. I should have never done that."
"Please doll, don't cry… I'm really sorry… I shouldn't say those words. I shouldn't hurt you." You continued to cry, "Tell me what to do to make it stop."
"Just go away, Bucky." Your voice barely whispered.
"Do you really hate me that much, doll?" You nodded at him, "Will it make it better if I go away?"
You stayed silent, this was what you wanted, for him to leave. But why did you feel so hurt? You didn't answer him, you couldn't answer him.
Instead you just sobbed like a mess. "Y/N, please, look at me." You didn't, you were so tired of everything, you couldn't even lift a finger. You felt numb and just sad, it hurt so much.
"Please, doll. I'm a jerk, a horrible person. Tell me what I can do to make it up to you.” He dropped down on his knees looking at you with sad eyes, begging. “Please. I need you. I can't lose you."
You were shocked, the most feared assassin in the world was on his knees, in front of you. He looked at you, and you just shook your head. He was being sincere and genuine, but you couldn't accept it. "I need you, please. Give me a chance, let me make it up to you. I beg of you, don't leave me." He was being sincere and genuine, but you couldn't accept it.
You were looking at him crying, not knowing what to do. There wasn't an excuse, nothing would make this better. You felt your heart break, seeing him like this made your heart ache. You had so much pain inside of you. You just couldn't.
"Bucky, just stop." You tried to made him stand up but he wouldn't. "Get up, this is stupid."
He shook his head, "Not until you give me a chance. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, I'm not even worthy of looking at you, but please, let me have a chance." He looked up at you with tearful eyes.
"Don't do this. You're making it worse." You said and he grabbed your hand, "If it means I get a chance, then I'm not getting up. Just please, tell me what I can do."
You closed your eyes. This is so wrong, he was so wrong, this is not right. "I can't do this, this is crazy." You closed your eyes tightly and sighed. You were conflicted.
He shook his head and cried, "I didn't know what came over me, I wasn't good at expressing my feelings, I don't know what else to say, except that I'm sorry.”
You scoffed, "And why do you think you have the right to say that, after all the shit you've done?"
He looked at you, and spoke, "Because, I was wrong, and I'm really sorry."
You didn't want to give in but he was looking at you with such an innocent expression, he looked so broken and helpless. "Sorry just doesn't cut it, Barnes.”
He was quiet for a moment, then spoke, "I know I don't, doll. I know I'm a monster. A murderer. I don't have a right to live." He said in between sobs, and you couldn't help but feel pity towards him. "I've given up all my hopes and dreams when I've been in the hydra. But you give me hope, doll. You give me dreams."
His eyes were filled with sadness, tears streaming down his face. "The minute I saw you, you were everything that was right. I didn't know who you were, and I had no idea how I was going to tell Steve, or anyone. I was afraid. So, I tried to stay away, but the more I was away, the more I missed you.”
Your heart beat faster, you felt something in your stomach. You couldn't describe it, you went to knelt in front of him, he didn't dare to meet your gaze. "Bucky, look at me.”
"I don't have the right, doll. I don't deserve to look at you." He said in between his sobs. “I'm a monster. I deserve to die, not to love."
"You are not a monster.” You placed your hand on his cheek, stroking it gently, hoping it would soothe him. “I’m sorry too for hurting you for all the things I said to you...”
He leaned into your touch, placing his hand over yours. "Please, don't apologize. It was all my fault. I caused this, I hurt you." He whispered.
"We both hurt each other, Bucky. We both fucked up.”
He still didn't meet your gaze. You held his chin and forced him to look at you. You cupped his cheeks, he looked so broken. You wiped his tears, and said, "Why did you say those things to me? Why you said I was a mistake? Why did you say you used me? Why Bucky?"
He took a deep breath and said “Because I was afraid that if I got close, I'll just end up hurting you. I always fuck up in the end somehow, look what I did. I'm such a stupid man. I'm an idiot and an asshole." He took your hands from his face, kissing them before placing them back to his cheeks. "I've never felt anything for anyone. I've never loved anyone, never been in love. Not until I met you. When I'm with you, I feel different. When you smiled at me, when you look at me, I feel that I could be a better man. I want to be a better man for you. You make me feel, you make me alive, you made me happy. You showed me a new life. You're everything I could've ever dreamed of. You're perfect and I don't deserve you."
His hand then touched your hand caressing it lightly, "I was really going to confess everything to you that night. I was going to tell you that I like you, and ask you if I can take you out, or if I can have the chance to show you how much you mean to me. That you make my heart beat fast, and how my whole body goes numb, and my skin tingles when I'm around you. I wanted to tell you that I love you, because I'm pretty sure that I do. But, when I was about to do it, I knocked on your door couple of times, but you didn't answer, so I thought that maybe you were already asleep. So I decided to wait until the next day.”
He took a deep breath before he continued. "That morning, I got a message from the victim's family when I killed them as winter soldier. They told me how they wished that I died instead. How they wished that it was me. And they said they had a daughter, and her name was Bianca. They said, she was beautiful and full of life. They said, if it wasn't for me, their daughter wouldn't have been murdered."
Your heart broke at his confession, but you stayed silent, listening to him, you couldn’t speak, not yet.
He confessed as he looked at you, his eyes filled with tears, and you couldn't help but cry too. "I felt so guilty hearing them said that. I was angry because of what I did. I was mad at myself, and I didn't want you to get involved with someone like me. I can't have anyone else get hurt. I don't know what I’ll do if anything happens to you."
You pulled him into a tight hug, and he clung to you. His arms wrapped around your waist. "I wanted to push you away, you deserve someone better. I thought, maybe if I was a jerk, you would stop liking me. But as soon as I realized, I regretted everything.”
You held him tighter, your heart aching for him. He sobbed quietly, burying his face into your neck. “I'm sorry, I didn't know what I was thinking. You were never mine, but losing you broke me. It was so hard for me to keep myself away from you when all I want is to be with you. I know it, and I don't deserve you.”
"It's okay, I'm here." You rubbed his back, trying to calm him down.
He broke the hug and looked at your eyes, "You have every right not to believe me, but please. Give me a chance. One last chance, and if you decide you still hate me, then I'll let you go. But please, please give me a chance to prove myself."
You didn't know what to do. He was broken, and he was begging you for a chance. It was the least you could do. You were conflicted, but your heart won over, you couldn't bear to see him on his knees like this. "Okay, Bucky. But first let's stand up, my legs are killing me."
He pulled you up, his arms encircling your waist, pulling you flush against him. "I won't disappoint you, doll. I promise. I will make it up to you, and if it takes me forever, then I'll do it."
You stood and looked at him, "Bucky, if we're going to do this. You must promise me, no more secrets. We have to be honest to each other. We have to learn to talk about our problems, and we have to try and understand each other. If you have something bothering you, don't push me away. Come and talk to me."
"Okay, I promise." He nodded, "Thank you, doll. For giving me a chance. I won't fail you." He pulled you closer, his hands gripping your hips, his eyes burning with lust.
You looked at him and smiled, he looked back at you and gave you a small smile. "But that doesn't mean I already forgive you. It's going to take some time, but I want us to work on this. Together."
"Yeah, I know. I will beg every minute if it takes.” His hands moved to your hips, holding you firmly in place. You both stood there in silence before he asked, "Doll, what are we now?"
"What do you mean?" You knew what he was asking but you pretended to not know.
"Doll, can I ask you out? Will you be my girl?"
You relished the moment, letting him wait with a playful pause. His nervous anticipation brought a smile to your face. "Yes, if you'll have me."
Bucky sighed in relief, "Finally!" A broad smile adorned his face as he hugged you tightly, lifting you off the ground and spinning you around. Laughter bubbled from within you. "Thank you, doll." He gently set you down, and you both stared at each other.
You then wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him into a kiss. He was shocked at first, but soon his arms wrapped around your waist. He kissed back and it was the most passionate kiss ever.
You then wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him into a kiss. He was shocked at first, but soon enough, he responded. You moaned into the kiss, your body melting into his embrace, and his arms circled your waist, pulling you closer.
His tongue brushed against your lower lip, asking for entrance. You parted your lips, allowing his tongue to slip inside, tasting your mouth. Your tongue danced with his. His tongue explored every inch of your mouth. His hand found its way into your hair, tugging slightly, eliciting another moan from you. He pulled back and pecked your lips, smiling softly. "You're beautiful, doll."
You blushed and bit your lower lip, a smirk forming on your face. "You're not so bad yourself, sergeant."
He chuckled and shook his head, "You're making me blush, doll."
“Shut up, kiss me again.” You tugged his collar and pulled him closer, your lips colliding in a passionate kiss. You two had a lot to talk about, but that could wait. Right now, you just wanted to stay in his arms. You wanted him.
Bucky then grabbed your ass and lifted you, and you wrapped your legs around his waist. You felt the wall behind you and Bucky placed his metal arm on the wall.
You felt his erection rubbing on your center, and he started grinding his hips into yours. You felt him rub against you and moan into your mouth. "Ahh, Bucky."
You could feel him twitching through his jeans, and his metal hand moved from the wall, to under your shirt. He caressed your stomach and moved his hand upwards. Your heart was pounding, and you were excited.
He stopped the kiss and placed his forehead on yours. “Doll, can I?"
"Yes." You whispered.
His hand cupped your breast, and he groaned. “You drive me crazy, doll." He pinched your nipple between his thumb and finger. You moaned and he placed his other hand down your pants. You felt him pull your pants down, and he slipped his fingers in between your folds.
"Bucky."
"Doll, you're so wet." He groaned, and started to rub your clit. "So beautiful."
His metal hand continued to play with your nipples, and he used his left hand to start rubbing your clit faster. You started to moan louder, and Bucky put his other hand over your mouth.
"Shh, baby, be quiet. I don't want the others hearing." He smirked and removed his hand from your mouth. You bit your lip and his finger started to slide inside you.
"Please Bucky..."
"What do you need, doll?"
"You."
He grinned, "Are you sure? I mean we just made up."
"I'm sure, and plus I've already touched myself thinking of you."
Bucky groaned, "Oh god, that's so fucking hot. Tell me more."
"I was fingering myself and I was thinking about your dick, and how much I needed you. I was thinking of your cock filling me up."
"Oh god, fuck."
"But it wasn't enough, and it would never be enough. I needed your big fat cock to make me cum."
When things got intense, then suddenly you heard something fell down. You both froze and looked around, then Bucky let you go and you were back on your feet.
Then a rat came out, and you and Bucky breathed a sigh of relief. You laughed, and you were blushing.
"Hey, don't laugh." He teased.
"That was a huge ass rat! What was it doing in here?" you exclaimed.
"Welcome to New York, doll. It's a rat haven." he chuckled.
“Ugh, gross." You laughed and shot him a playful glance.
Bucky responded by wrapping his arm around your waist, pulling you in for a kiss. "Shall we continue this somewhere more private?" he suggested with a mischievous grin.
"Thought you won't ask." You said, smiling. You kissed him and bit his bottom lip. He moaned and looked at you and smirked. "Lead the way, Sergeant Barnes."
"Anything for you, doll." He guided you outside the alley, holding your hands. As you walked down the street, you felt a nervous excitement. His hand in yours, palms sweaty, he squeezed your hand and shot a warm smile your way.
You couldn't believe that he was actually holding your hand, and he was being nice. You felt something in the pit of your stomach, a good feeling. The man you have been in love with for two years, the man who is now your boyfriend, and the man who is going to take you back home and make you scream his name.
"Wanda saw us you know in the gym, why did you lie about it?" You looked up to him and he averted his gaze.
Bucky face hardened, he looked annoyed, "She told you that?" You nodded in confirmation. He sighed, a conflicted look in his eyes. "I didn't want you to be embarrassed or feel awkward. I thought it was best to say no one saw us. I guess she's a rat, just like those in the alley," he gritted his teeth, frustration building.
You chuckled, "It was awkward, I mean I got blackmail by her into buying her sex toys." You were giggling but Bucky wasn't.
"She did that to you? I'll talk to her." Bucky's tone indicated he was ready to take matters into his own hands.
"No, no, it's fine. Really," you reassured him, placing a gentle hand on his arm. "Don't be upset. And please, don't have a word with her. It's between me and her."
"Fine, baby. Only because it’s you who asked me.” He said.
You giggled and leaned up and kissed his cheek. Then Bucky called a taxi and opened the door for you. You blushed and thanked him. He climbed inside the car and sat close to you. He put his arm around your shoulders, and you laid your head on his chest.
The whole ride was silent. You noticed this wasn't the way to the compound, "Where are we going, Buck?"
He rubbed his thumb on your bare skin and you relaxed in his arms. "To my place."
"You have a place? But you live in the compound."
"Yeah, I have a place in Brooklyn. Just for me, no one knows about it, except Steve. I wanted some privacy and peace away from everyone. But, now you're going to know where I live, too."
"Oh, okay." You were so comfortable and calm that you fell asleep. You woke up to a gentle touch of a hand, stroking your hair.
"Wake up, doll. We're here." You arrived at your destination.
You lifted your head and looked at him sleepily. He looked at you and chuckled, "How can you be so cute and sexy at the same time, huh?"
You blushed and giggled, "Shut up."
"C'mon."
He took your hand and guided you inside the building. It was really nice, the hallway was bright and had a fresh scent. It was an old building, but it had a modern vibe. He opened the door and let you in.
It was a spacious studio apartment. The living room was open to the kitchen and the bedroom. "Wow this place is amazing."
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When you turned around, Bucky immediately kissed you and his hands were cupping your face. You smiled as he kissed you and his tongue slid in. The kiss was hungry and passionate, you felt how much he desired you, you could taste him, smell him. He pushed you against the wall and his thigh was pressed between your legs, rubbing you through the fabric.
His body pressed up against yours. His thigh was pressed between your legs, rubbing you through the fabric. He let go of your hand and you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him even closer. "Mhhh..." Your lips parted and his kisses moved to your neck. You were breathing heavily, moaning his name. His teeth nibbled at the skin and you grabbed his hair.
He moved his hands down your back and cupped your ass, lifting you up. Your legs automatically wrapped around his waist and your arms were on his neck. He carried you to the bedroom, his hands were everywhere and you were moaning into the kiss.
He sat on the bed and you were sitting on his lap. "Let's not stop this time, okay?" He looked into your eyes.
"Yes, yes." God yes, it had been too long since you had his cock inside you and you desperately wanted him.
"Good girl." Bucky started kissing your neck and you moved your hips, trying to grind against him. You let out a moan and held his head, running your hands through his hair.  
He started pulling off your clothes and you sat up and took off your shirt. Bucky stopped and was just staring at you. "What are you waiting for?" Your grip tightened around his hair.
"Sorry, just admiring the view." He pulled off his shirt, and then took his pants off. You stared at him, and he was breathtakingly beautiful. His body was chiseled and sculpted like a Greek God, and he was the most beautiful thing you've ever seen.
"Fuck..." You cursed as he unclasped your bra and began sucking on your left nipple and while his metal hand was kneading your right breast. He did the same to the other side. You were a moaning mess under his touch.
"Your breasts are so perfect, doll. Can't get enough of them."
You kissed him again and began grinding your hips against him. He then grabbed your hips and began grinding you back, you felt him getting hard, and you felt like you were going to explode soon. He was breathing heavily, his eyes were dark, lustful.
You then started to take off your panties. "No, leave them on. That's my job." He threw you on the mattress and got on top of you and started sucking and licking your nipples before he went down kissing your body. He was trailing wet kisses to your stomach. He took off your underwear and spread your legs.
Then he was on his knees, he kissed your inner thigh and made you whine. "So impatient, baby."
"Shut up."
He chuckled and then he was kissing the junction of your thighs and hips.
"Bucky, please!"
He smirked and then licked your slit. Your hands went to his hair and he was holding your hips. He was sucking your clit and licking your entrance. You were writhing under his touch. started licking your pussy, eating you out like a starving man.
"Holy shit... Bucky!" You were panting and he was going deeper and deeper.  You couldn't think straight anymore. All you could think was his mouth on your pussy. His tongue was working wonders on your cunt. You were moaning his name and tugging his hair.
He inserted a finger and pumped slowly, making you gasp and moan. "Ah, Buck, feels good." Your breath hitched.
"I can feel your tight pussy clenching around my finger, Y/N." He said as he added another finger. You arched your back and whimpered. He sucked your clit and pumped his fingers faster.
His fingers were reaching places that you didn't know existed. He sucked harder and was now fucking you with his fingers. You could feel his metal finger and the vibrations were intense.
He curled his fingers and you arched your back. He was sucking your clit and licking, too. Your legs were shaking and he was holding your hips harder.
"Fuck! Bucky!" You couldn't take it anymore. You were so close. "I'm gonna come."
"Come for me, baby. Come on my face."
"Fuck! Oh god. Bucky!" You screamed as you came on his face. You felt him smile as he licked up all your juices.
When he was done, "That's it, doll. Good girl. Come here." He got on top of you and kissed you. You could taste yourself on his tongue, and it was making you even more horny.
He was kissing your face and lips. "I want to ride you properly now, Bucky."
"God yes, whatever the lady wants." He moved off of you and lied on his back, and you crawled on top of him.
You kissed his chest and his stomach, then you looked into his eyes as you were moving down on him. You were rubbing his cock between your folds. His hands were on your hips, squeezing and digging his nails in.
"Baby, please." You heard him whisper.
"Please, what, Buck?"
"Please, stop teasing me. I need you, now." He was looking at you, and his pupils were so dilated, you could barely see his beautiful blue eyes.
You lined his cock up with your entrance and sank on him, both of you moaning when he was fully inside of you.
"Jesus Christ, doll. You're so tight. And warm."
You put your hands on his chest and started moving up and down on him, slowly at first. He was squeezing your thighs and hips, helping you move.
"Shit! Oh, fuck!" You were bouncing on him now, and he was thrusting up to meet your hips. He was gripping your hips tightly. You started to bounce up and down, and your hands were on his chest. "You feel so good, Buck. You're stretching me out so well."
"Yeah? You're riding me like a champ, baby." He was breathing hard and grunting every time he was slamming into you.
"Ahh, Bucky, yes!" You were biting your lips and throwing your head back, and Bucky was thrusting up.
"Mmm, you like that, sweetheart?"
"Yes! Harder!" You closed your eyes, he felt so good inside you.
"Look at me, baby. Look at me, while I'm fucking you."
You opened your eyes and you were bouncing faster, and he was thrusting his hips faster, too. He was hitting your g-spot and you were getting closer to your orgasm. You were squeezing his biceps. "I've been waiting to fuck you properly since our last time. Couldn't wait to make you scream my name, doll."
"Then do it, make me scream, Buck"
"I will, doll. I promise." You were slamming into each other now, both of you close. You felt his finger touching your clit. "Ahh, you look so pretty when you're riding me, doll. Look at you. So fucking perfect. You're gonna make me cum."
He was looking at you with lust in his eyes. You grabbed his metal arm and sucked on his fingers. You started to suck harder, and you moaned.
He started thrusting harder and faster, the bed was hitting the wall. His hand went to your clit and he started rubbing fast. His other hand kneaded your breasts. You moved even faster and you were getting close, "Buck, you're so good. I'm close."
"I know, I can feel it. You’re doing so good for me, doll. Fuck, doll. Can I come inside you? Please?"
"Yes! Yes, please, come inside me, Buck."
You were screaming his name and digging your nails to his chest. His hand left your breast and was gripping your hips hard. You knew it was going to leave bruises. You were bouncing faster and your orgasm hit you like a truck.
"Oh god, Bucky!" You screamed his name and collapsed on his chest.
"I'm gonna fill your tight pussy up, baby."
"Please, Buck, please."
"FUCK! Y/N! Take it all, baby. Take it." He was filling you up, and you could feel him twitching inside of you.
"Yes! That's it. Fill me up, Buck."
"Jesus." You were both panting and trying to catch your breath. You were resting your head on his chest, and you could hear his heartbeat. He then flipped you over, so you were under him. You felt him that he was still hard, and he was looking at you with a grin. "Can you handle another round, doll? Or are you too tired?"
You smirked and raised your eyebrow. "Are you challenging me, Barnes?"
"Maybe."
"Let's see how long you can keep up, sergeant."
"I can do this all night, doll. How about you?"
"Oh, I'm just getting started."
"Good, 'cause I'm not finished with you yet." He smirked and moved over you.
"You're in for a wild ride, Barnes."
"Bring it on, doll." He pulled your legs and you were in a mating press position, with him towering over you.
"Show me what you've got, soldier."
"Oh, I'll show you." He pulled your legs and you were in a mating press position. He was teasing you with his tip and you were moaning loudly. You were already so sensitive, you were ready to cum again.
"Tell me you want it."
"Yes. I want it! I want you, Bucky."
"Beg me, doll."
"Please. I beg you, please fuck me."
"Who owns you?"
"You do. Only you!"
"Good girl." With that, he entered inside you in a swift motion and buried himself to the hilt and you screamed. "I'm gonna fuck you so hard, and make you forget everything."
He was holding your legs and spreading them more. You were a moaning mess underneath him. He pounded into you so hard, and you were gripping the sheets. Your orgasm was approaching and he was holding your hips hard. You were sure he was going to leave a mark.
"You're not gonna walk after I'm done with you." He was thrusting faster and harder. You were a mess, you were sweating and panting. He was rubbing your clit and pumping into you. He was kissing your neck and you were screaming his name.
Then, he was thrusting fast and rough, and kissing your face. He was nipping your neck and biting. You were leaving marks on his back, and he was gripping your hips.
The way he thrusts his hips, it was like he was a fucking machine. He was a man of his word, and you weren't going to walk tomorrow. He was grunting and groaning and kissing your neck.
He was now pounding so hard into you, and your breasts were bouncing. "You love when I fuck you, don't you?"
"Yes, Bucky. Yes, I do. You're stretching me out so good, Bucky. Don't stop."
"Oh, I'll fuck you until the morning, baby." He was now fucking into your g-spot and his vibranium hand was rubbing your clit.
"Fuck! Bucky, I'm gonna come again!"
"Cum for me, doll. Be a good girl."
"Fuck, Bucky." He gave few more thrusts, and you were seeing stars. You were coming hard and screaming his name.
You were both panting, and Bucky was trying to catch his breath. "Holy shit, doll."
"Yeah, that was amazing."
He lifted his head, and looked at you. "Was? I'm not done, yet."
"What?! Bucky, we can't do it anymore. I already came three times. I can't go again."
"Awww, is my little kitten too sensitive, huh?" He teased you as he lightly slapped your pussy making you yelp.
"Stop it." You said, still sensitive, “Please…”
"Well, we're just getting started. I meant when I said I'm going to fuck you until the sun rises." He flipped you over and he was kissing your back. "Your body is so perfect, baby."
His hands were rubbing and squeezing your ass cheeks. "I want to take you from behind, baby. Can I do that? I want to see that pretty little ass.”
"Mmmmm, fine."
He slapped your ass and you moaned. "Such a good little kitten." He slapped your ass a couple more times, and you moaned. "Now, I'm gonna make you purr like a kitten."
He grabbed a handful of your ass and spread your cheeks. He was teasing you with his tip, and you were pushing your ass against him. "Such a horny kitten, you are." He slowly pushed his cock into you, and you were moaning. He grabbed your hips and started to thrust. He was fucking you slow and deep. But then, he was moving his hips faster.
You were lying on your stomach, and Bucky was pounding into you hard and fast. You were screaming his name. "You're all mine, baby."
He gripped your hair yanking you into pulling you into a kiss. You opened your mouth and his tongue slid in. He explored every inch of your mouth. Your tongues wrestled for dominance, and he won.
"That's it, doll." He was fucking you so hard, he was slapping your ass, and was holding your hips. His dick was hitting all the right spots. You were a moaning mess, you couldn't form words. He was fucking you hard and fast.
The slapping noises were getting louder and the bed was squeaking. His hands started to pinch your nipples making you scream his name, the pleasure was too intense. "I'm close, baby. Let's cum together."
He then continued pounding and you could feel his dick twitch inside. He was grunting and panting. “FUCK, Y/N!” He then came, filling you up. His cum was dripping out of your pussy. He was still inside you, riding out his high.
He pulled out of you but then you noticed he was still hard. "Buck, how are you hard again?!"
He chuckled, "You're the one who made me like this."
You were mesmerized by his stamina but also scared at the same time. He got in between your legs and kissed you passionately. He was kissing down your body and leaving a trail of wet kisses.
“Fuck… Ah… Bucky I can’t… Not anymore.” You were so sensitive and spent, you have came so many times.
"Your moans say otherwise, doll." He grinned as he took his cock and lined it to your entrance and entered you without warning once again. You screamed and gripped his biceps.
He was thrusting his hips faster and hitting your g-spot. You were both moaning loudly, and saying each other's names.  "You're taking me so well, sweetheart." You were a sweaty mess and Bucky was gripping your hips.
He was pounding into you and he was so big, it felt like you were being ripped apart. But, you loved the pain. You were scratching his back and leaving marks. You were both leaving bruises on each other's body.
"Fuck, Bucky. Ah, yes!"  He was pounding into you and you were moaning loudly.
"That's it, doll. Moan for me."
He was thrusting deeper and harder. Your hands were roaming around his body. You were touching and squeezing every part of him. You cried out as he increased his speed. "Fuck Bucky i can't..." you couldn't come anymore, you were overstimulated.
"Yes you can doll, I know you can." He rubbed your clit faster with now his teeth bit your nipple, “Fucking give it to me, doll.”
You cried out and came all over his cock. "That's my good little kitten." He praised.
But he wasn't done with you yet. You felt so much pleasure and pain, but it felt so good. Bucky thrusted faster and harder, his thrusts were deep. He slammed into you and started thrusting even faster and deeper.
"Shit. Bucky, ahh..." You gasped when his hand found your neck and he squeezed. His grip tightened and he began pounding you harder. You were moaning his name over and over again. You could feel every inch of his thick, long dick, and it was filling you so good.
He then leaned down and was fucking you deep. His metal arm was wrapped around your waist and the other one was choking you. He was sucking and licking your breasts. You were moaning uncontrollably. "Fuck, I'm so close. Let's come together, come to me one more time."
"I can't, Bucky! It's too much." You whimpered. “Please, no more.” You were begging him, you couldn’t take it anymore.
“You can do it doll. Show me what a good girl you are.” He pounded to you faster, his thrusts becoming erratic as he pistoning you in and out.
You were a sweating mess and you couldn't form a coherent sentence. "Holy shit, oh my god, ahhh, fffuck, ahh, ah, mhh, ohh, shit."
You gripped the sheets and screamed his name and you were shaking uncontrollably. Your vision went white and your ears rang. You felt your body go limp. You couldn't move. Your body was overstimulated and tired.
Bucky continued thrusting and you felt him twitch inside you. You both cried out each other's names as you came together. Bucky got off you and laid next to you, pulling you close to him.
You felt so sleepy afterwards, you were spent. He then cleaned you both up before he snuggled with you. "How are you feeling, baby?" He asked.
"Like I can't feel my legs."
He kissed the top of your head and laughed. "Sorry about that, doll."
You chuckled. "Don't apologize. That was the best sex I've ever had."
He held you close and kissed you deeply. You ran your fingers through his hair and he cupped your cheek. As you laid there with him, “I’m sorry Bucky for what I did to you back then on the gym, I took advantage of you… I-“
Bucky stopped you with kissing you. “I know doll, you don’t have to apologize. Like you said, we both hurt each other. Let’s not from now on okay? I promise I’ll be the best version of myself and no more hiding from you.”
You smiled at him, “I would like that.”
Bucky then kissed your forehead, “I love you, Y/N.”
You couldn’t believe your ears, he said it again, “I freaking love you. I've fallen for you ever since the day you helped me out at the hospital and you didn't judge me, you treated me with nothing but respect when I treated you horribly. You have a heart of gold and I'm just glad I was able to finally tell you my feelings. I'm sorry for the way I treated you before, I was just scared to let you in but now I want you in my life, you make me feel safe and loved."
He cupped your cheeks, "Please stay with me. Don't let go of me. I'm begging you to be mine, just mine. Only mine. And I will give my whole life for you, just to be with you, to make up for the time we lost. You are all that I want and all that I need. You are the one for me. If I can't be with you, I don't want to be with anyone else. Please let me take care of you and treat you like the angel you are."
He leaned down and pressed his lips on yours as he whispered, "Be mine and no one else's. Please..."
You felt tears in your eyes, this time it was tears of happiness. "Yes...yes Bucky...I'll be yours. I'm all yours." You went to kissed him but soon the kiss deepened. You moved on top of him as he squeezed your ass and you grinded against him.
Bucky broke the kiss and groaned, "Doll, we have to stop." He put his hands on your waist, trying to slow your movements. Bucky bit his bottom lip. "Or I’m going to get blue balls for the rest of the night."
Your eyes went to his cock seeing it starting to get hard once more. You chuckled and got off him. Bucky laid on his side as you snuggled next to him, "You're right."
Bucky kissed the top of your head, "Thank you, doll. Thank you for loving me. For being my girl and only mine."
"You are welcome, and thank you, for making me yours." You snuggled close to him.
He pulled you closer and caressed your cheeks, "You are perfect, just perfect."
He pulled the sheets over you, so you didn't get cold. You yawned and closed your eyes as you held Bucky's hand and drifted off to sleep. "Sleep well, baby."
You smiled, “Good night, Bucky.”
You were happy, and he was happy. This was all you ever wanted, and it seemed like everything was going well.
But, you still have a problem, a big one. Your friends and the Avengers. They would definitely freak out.
—— FIN ——
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638 notes ¡ View notes
rhadamanthes ¡ 8 months ago
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In and out. Satoru x reader x Sukuna
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genre : smut, porn with plot.
word count : 4.4k
warnings : cheating, loss of virginity, oral f and m reciving, praise, degradation, fingering, cuckholhing
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You fidget nervously in front of the big door which the bell you just rang. When the door finally opens you are struck with the warm temperature inside wasting no time you rush past your host searching to stop the shivers in your whole body. Satoru closes the door before he laughs at your behavior. He then turns to you, giving you a quick hug as a hello. You take a step back smiling at him but you can clearly see the curiosity in his blue eyes as of why you're here. You feel the embarrassment fill your body and the heat rush to your cheeks.
"How are you? It's been a while" you say nervously as an attempt to break the ice.
You're obviously embarrassed which brings Satoru great joy as he stare down at you with a playful smirk on his lips
``Yeah I’ve been good, you know the usual, would have been better if you came to see me earlier but you've been busy I’m sure" he says walking to the living room, you on his tail.
"I was but you could have called me too for the record" you know that he is toying with you but you can't help stuttering over your words. You're both sitting on his large velvety couch now.He chuckled at your accusation
"Oh yeah with the scary boyfriend of yours he would have thrown your phone by the window just at the sight of my name." your whole body tenses at the mention of your lover, it doesn't go unnoticed by Satoru all seeing eyes and he opens his mouth wide
"No way don't tell me you two are over" You're quick to shut him down waving your hands in the air.
"No! Of course not, it's just that i need something from you that I can't get from him " you don't sound so sure and it shows, Satoru takes your hand in his own urging you to explain further. you take a deep breath before squeezing his hands.
"I want you to have sex with me"
If he was wearing a teasing expression before your announcement, he now looks mortified. letting his hand slip from your grasp he stares at you in disbelief
"Are you out of your mind" you never saw him this serious it start to make you anxious too. "You have a boyfriend to do these types of things, why are you asking me that" he snaps.
"Because he doesn't want me ! Every time I try to initiate things he just blows me off and I'm sick of it! I want to know how it feels!" you raise your voice becoming more and more humiliated. "
You're a virgin ?" he asks and his voice sounds higher than usual. Shutting down completely you turn your back to him pondering if you should just leave right now. "No I mean of course you are '' you stand up at his words ready to get out
"No! no, no i mean you're so pure and all this stuff you know" he gestures vaguely while holding your shoulders to keep you from moving "Please try to understand all those revelations it's a lot, why would he push you away? you're perfect, you two are disgustingly in love and I know for sure that he is not a virgin I just don't get it "
You turn around to face him again "The why doesn't matter are you going to help me or not ?" you can see the gear turning in his head before he nods vigorously.
"If it's what you want, who am I to deny you" he says his cheshire smile making a return on his beautiful features. Finally satisfied you grab his hands and start to climb up the stairs that lead to his room.
You're both seated on his bed making out heavily when he broke the kiss
"So you never did anything else besides kissing?" he can't help but ask curiously you blush at his questions nodding your head
" I gave him a hand job once." you say not even looking him in the eyes.
"And that's it he didn't do anything in return ?" you shake your head left to right. Satoru scoffs
"Well good thing you came to me I’m going to make up for that" he says pinning you down engulfing your lips once again.
Your whole body feels like it’s burning as you squirm out of your dress. Soon the both of you are in your underwear exploring each other's bodies. You moan at every new part he touches with his big warm hands. He cups your naked breast with his hands leaving a trail of wet kisses down your neck. you push lightly on his shoulder to see his face, his brows furrowed, his lips pursed
"Satoru i want more, now." you say breathing heavily and you see his face soften at your words
"As you wish" he answers making his way down your panties.
Kneeling on the floor he spread your legs and get rid of the last piece of cloth on your body your pussy is now completely exposed to him his mouth open slightly at the sight.
"Would you look at that" he says collecting the arousal from your entrance and showing you his glistening finger. Dumbfounded, you just stare at his fingers before he ducks his head between your thighs licking at your fold you gasp in shock at the new sensation. You're a moaning mess knowing Satoru's reputation, this is probably the millionth time he is doing this but you're still amazed at his precision its like he already knows your body, circling your clit with his warm tongue while he keep his eyes on you not missing a single reaction of yours.
"I'm going to put a finger in baby" he announces kissing your inner thigh.
You nod one more time not trusting your voice to be consistent. His digit prod at your entrance until it slowly fills you up. The stretch makes you hiss at first but Satoru is so good to you taking his time observing your reactions. You finally relax around his finger as he attaches his mouth to your clit, sucking on it eagerly as his fingers curl inside of you in a way that drives you crazy.
"Satoru oh my god" you cry, at this point you can't hold the eye contact anymore resting your back on the soft mattress. You feel a second finger entering as he starts to make scissor movement inside of you stretching you more. All of his ministrations start to make you feel dizzy, your orgasm builds up, you clench the sheets .
"I’m close please don't stop it feels so good" you manage to stutter. He moans as you close your thigh around his head letting the bliss wave run through your body cumming on his tongue and fingers.
"You did so good for me princess" Satoru murmurs against your lips, before they press against yours making you taste yourself. You're still a bit hazy from your orgasm, your hand slides to his pants trying to unzip it before he grabs your wrist
"Today is all about you just relax, I got this," he says in an awfully sweet tone. regaining feeling in your body you realize that this is really going to happen his fingers already made you feel so good you can't imagine with his cock. You bite your lips , he's fully naked now, his dick his long, thick and already hard. Satoru positions himself on top of you
"Hands on my shoulder baby tap when it's too much" you roll your eyes at his instructions as much as you appreciate his cautiousness it feels belittling right now.
"I'm not made of sugar just don't jackhammer me and I will survive" putting your hands on his shoulders nevertheless.
"Ok boss" he chuckled, planting a kiss on your cheek. Satoru grabs his length running it up and down your entrance making you jump slightly at how sensitive your pussy is still. You can tell he wants to mock you for that so you just give him your most severe stare which doesn't seem to be convincing: he is smiling ear to ear.
A few more strokes and he let his tip enter your tight pussy. You let your nail dig into his skin as the intrusion of his thick member takes the breath out of your lungs. Satoru pets your hair, his forehead against yours in an attempt to ease your pain. The back and forth movement get you used slowly to his girth and allow him to be fully inside of you in no time you're still tense but the sensation become more and more pleasant you relax your body at the sound of his moans
"God you feel so good baby you're so tight for me" the praise goes straight to your pussy adding to your wetness. He relocated his face in your neck taking in your scent moaning like a depraved man. You lock your legs behind his back feeling the dizziness return at the way he is hitting all the right spots you didn’t know you had.
“Satoru I want more” you beg
“More ?” he asks, turning his face to you .
“Go faster please I need it”
“Shit” he mutters under his breath.
He grabs your hips for better leverage and picks up his pace slightly, still not sure at how much you can take for your first time without hurting you.
But damn you’re here under him begging for more, your brows furrowed mouth open in a lustful way letting out the prettiest moan he ever heard at each of his strokes. Looking at you closely he can see the tears welling up in your eyes. No doubt you’re going to be the death of him. You’re close, he can tell the grip on his shoulders has hardened and you're clenching both your legs and your walls around him. Shit at this pace he’s going to cum to before he can even process this thought you’re unravelling around him babbling some words he can’t comprehend
“Hold on for me a bit more baby I’m close” he says pressing his lips against yours. Your face is in his neck as you hum absentmindedly. His sloppy trust signal you that he is about to cum and you snap back to reality
“You can’t cum inside of me Satoru” he groans but keep going you start to panic tapping his shoulders
“Satoru please” you cry in his ear He pull out all at once making you hiss at the roughness. He then starts to stroke his cock until he finishes on your tummy moaning at his release. Once he’s done he collapses on top of you his hands find a way to your hair running through them
“Next time I see your boyfriend I’ll thank him that was amazing y/n” you freeze at his words
“Satoru you can’t tell anybody about this I’m so serious” you say pushing on his shoulder so you can look at him in the eyes.
He looks high, eyes half closed and a stupid smile at the corner of his lips
“I know baby relax” he says caressing your cheek softly. You lean at his touch giving him a small smile. The cold air of the room seems to hit you at once, especially on your lower abdomen. That's right you think he came here, collecting a few drops with your fingers you bring them to your mouth to get a taste. Meeting his gaze once more you swear you saw his eyes twitch.
A few days have passed since you decided to lose your virginity to Satoru Gojo. You ran into him a few times on campus, always rushing past him to avoid an embarrassing interaction or to raise suspicion from your friends. He managed to corner you once asking if you were avoiding him out of regret but you were quick to explain that he doesn’t have to do much with him but more with your relationship. He was very understanding that day and made small talk for a few minutes. One thing leading to another, he also taught you how he liked his blowjobs that day, always in his patronizing ways, added to the fact that he petted your head all along while you were on his knees pleasing him, but you gladly accepted it knowing it will come in handy someday.
You were home playing some games when your phone buzzed. A text from your boyfriend asking you to come over ! You immediately drop everything to doll yourself up for your lover. He’s been gone for a week now, away at some relatives. you’re so excited to see him again. With your new found confidence and experience you’re sure you can make it fold now. The driver pulls up in front of your boyfriend's crib and you almost jump out of the car after you thanked him. You find the door already cracked open which makes you smile. He always does this to let you know you can come in. taking off your shoes in the foyer you don’t hear a single noise coming from the house.
“Sukuna ? where are you”
“Bedroom” you hear from down the hallway.
Following the sound of his voice you enter his bedroom and freeze immediately at what you see. Satoru is here tied up to a chair with some ropes. You feel your heart sink to your feet that means that he knows. approaching Satoru quickly, you try to untie the ropes.
"Oh my god are you okay?” Satoru nodded his head slightly. You almost jump out of your body when you feel a hand on your shoulder
“Had fun while I was away darling?” This voice can’t be mistaken for anybody else you close your eyes, gaining composure before you turn around facing him. You forgot how tall he was, looming over you waiting for your answer. He is so handsome you want to trace his chiseled face with your hands.
“Hey Sukuna” you say smiling awkwardly not knowing what was coming. Against all expectations he smiles at you, you smile back.He is not going to kill you after all ?
“So… you know ?” you ask with the feeling of walking on eggshells. He scoffed putting your hair behind your ear
“Know what? That you gave yourself to someone else while I was away for 5 fucking days ? Yeah I know.” He dryly states both hands at the side of your face making it impossible for you to look away. You swallow hard, feeling the humiliation take over your body, the tip of your ears flaming hot.
“Listen I-“ he doesn’t even give you the time to finish your sentence, putting his thumbs over your lips, shushing you. He takes your purse from your hand and throws it on Satoru who groans at the impact your coat is next to follow.
“Sukuna!” you hiss “it’s a Chanel bag!”
“Thank you” Satoru spat at the fact that you’re clearly more worried about some purse then him. You turn to him to apologize
“ It’s not about that you have expensive taste too you know how much that costs” you say picking up the bag and the coat from his lap putting them on the nearby desk.
“Didn’t realize you two were this close” Sukuna says his arm crossed over his chest
“God forbid women have friends”
“I don’t sleep with my friends” he says angrily.
“Well I do and it’s all your fault you’re so unfair I’ve been telling you that I wanted this for months now I don’t care about the location or the time I just want you! And you always find the most stupid excuses to deny me ! I have needs too you know!” you say closing the distance between you two.
Satoru always loved drama especially from an exterior point of view, now he is literally seated front row as you two bicker basically over who loves each other the most. Sukuna telling you he waited for the right moment he wanted it to be special and you telling it just needed to be with the person you loved aka him.
He couldn’t be more satisfied actually, yes if it wasn’t for the ropes biting at his fragile skin but he still had the exclusivity on this little bickering which was in part his fault too. His train of thought is cut short when Sukuna grabs your jaw approaching his face to your
“Don’t look at me like that” he grits
“Like what?” you answer not missing a beat. Silence, you two are looking at each other faces centimeter away from each other breathing hard from all the arguing.
He lunges forward kissing you with all he got; it's messy and needy. You throw your arms behind his neck standing on your tippy toes so he can get a better access to your mouth. He wastes no time wrapping your thigh around his waist leading you to the bed. Your back hit the mattress as you broke the kiss out of breath
“I want this I want it now and I want it for real this time.”
“You’re going to get everything you want doll” you’re about to kiss him again when Satoru’s voice interrupts you
“Hey I’m glad you two are finally getting at it but I rather not witness it so please” he says moving his head toward the restraint.
“Shut up you punk you’ll go when I tell you to” Sukuna says glaring in his direction he then turn to you
“Get on your knees” you look at him curiously before he scoff “A little bird told me you kneeled on campus before that dumbass, why not for your boyfriend?” Your blood ran cold at his revelation before it clicked in your head Uraume of course he would ask them to keep an eye on you while he’s gone. You feel mortified at the fact that somebody did see you in a compromising way but also relieved that Satoru did not betrayed your trust.
Indulging in your boyfriend will you’re now facing his crotch quickly getting rid of his pants and underwear. Your mouth water at the sight, you already saw him naked before but never this close and definitely not for this purpose. He is half hard you get closer to take his member in your hand but he slaps it on your cheek instead. You feel the humiliation setting in at the fact that Satoru is watching all of that only a few meters away.
“How fun was it to blow one of your friends in a public space like some back alley whore tell me” he asks as he keeps slapping his dick on your face. You clear your throat wanting to answer but he cuts you off.
“Doesn’t really matter, make a good use of that mouth and show me how he likes it” He says letting it rest on your forehead.
You take his length in your hand lifting it off your face before you start licking at his balls with passion. The heavy moan he let out encourages you to continue closing your lips alternating between lapping and swirling your tongue around them. Sukuna gasps at your boldness
“You sure like sweet things Satoru” he says petting the top of your head. He only groans in response.
You feel proud about making him feel good and you want to show him more. You spit in your hands before you start stroking his length once he’s fully hard you put his cock in your mouth sucking at the sensitive tip he hisses leaning back resting on his forearms never breaking the eye contact. It makes you nervous that his crimson eyes scrutinize your every move but it also makes you proud as he is smiling like a mad man.
Bobbing your head back and forth you take more and more of his length in your wet mouth, careful not to choke. You hollow your cheek at the same time for him to feel good. It has him throwing his head back a deep laugh coming from his throat
“Ah shit you really corrupted my little princess to the core she’s a pro now” your cheeks heat up at the semi praise but you keep swallowing him down your tongue lapping under his shaft.
Soon you feel his cock twitch inside of your mouth signaling you that he is close to cumming. He rises from his previous positions gripping a lock of your hair, he pulls his length out of your mouth, he jerks it off in front of your face. You moan at the sight wishing he would have finished inside of your mouth. His semen ends on the side of your cheek and is slowly running down your chin. You hear the chair squeak on the floor Satoru is now right next to you looking at you with hungry eyes.
“Clean her up” Sukuna orders gripping a lock of white hair positioning Satoru’s mouth where he let his trail you close your eyes in anticipation and a moan escape your mouth when you feel his warm tongue running up your chin and neck. It’s so filthy you think but you would be lying if you say that it didn’t turn you on.
You feel Satoru trying to kiss you but Sukuna is quick to push back the chair away from reach giving him a cold stare
“It’s not a bag that I will throw your way if you try to be funny again” he warns. Satoru only laughed at his threat.
Wanting your boyfriend's attention back you start caressing his thick thighs
“Did I do good?” his gaze falls your way softening a bit he picks you up from the floor placing you on his lap like you weigh nothing to him. He rubs your side looking at you with a loving gaze
“Yes you did baby” he kisses your mouth softly “You’re ready for the real thing ?” he asks mischievously as you nod your head kissing him back.
He lifts your hips with one hand directing his cock to your hole with the other, you feel his tip stretch your pussy followed by his whole length you place your hands on his shoulder as you start moving your hips experimentally. Sukuna groans at how tight you are around his cock but you take him so well you're such a good girl so eager to please him. He bites on your neck, hard you whimper at the sensation. This position makes you feel his cock in a way you never thought existed. He guides you hips making you bounce on it.
Soon you feel overwhelmed. You finally get what you want after all this time but you can't help but feel guilty as you two didn't share your first time together. The tears fall from your eyes and you hide face in his neck
"I'm sorry Sukuna im so sorry" you wheep against his bare skin. His cock twitches at your pathetic tone but deep down he also feels bad too.
" I'm sorry too baby i should have never put you aside for so long" he says in a hushered breath as he is still bouncing you up and down his length.He dig your face from out of his neck making you look at him
"Your mine and i'm yours it doesn't matter anymore,say it baby say that your mine" he urges you
"I'm all yours i promise" you whimper you say before capturing his lips in a much needed kiss his hands goes up to the back of your head holding you in place. the kiss is messy and carnal your biting each other lips groaning like angry dogs he break the kiss pressing your cheek to his own facing satoru
"I want you to look at him when you cum and tell him that you're mine" he say in a raspy voice you nod as best as you can picking up the pace with your hips moving in circles.
Satoru looks spent. He is breathing heavily just like he ran a marathon. You can see the bulge in his pants as well as a stain. Did he came in his pants watching the two of you having sex ? The idea makes your pussy clench, bringing your orgasm closer
"I want to cum with you I want you to cum inside of me Sukuna please I belong to you" you beg eyes still fixed on the poor white haired man.
Being so close to him you feel his torso vibrate with his groan at your words. A few more moves of your hips and you two came undone moaning like animals in rut. He's holding you close to his chest and letting his back hit the mattress breathing heavily at his release. He kisses your forehead softly while rubbing your back
" My good girl" he pants. you beam at the praise catching your breath against his muscular chest. Your eyes are getting heavy when you hear Satoru's voice call you name
"Please get these off of me" You snap out of your bubble quickly grabbing sukuna shirt to cover your naked body, making your way to the chair you feel his cum trickling down your leg you cringe at the thought but make a quick work of the ropes that restraint your friend.
"I'm sorry Satoru, are you ok" you say, massaging his wrist adorned with red marks. He wastes no time standing up to move his sore limbs
"I'll be fine" he says avoiding your gaze.
You remember that his clothes must feel uncomfortable now, you offer him a change of cloth from your boyfriend's closet before he interrupts you
"Do you also want me to bathe and feed him? He can go home like that. It's not a big deal."
You turn vigorously to him "Sukuna! don't be an ass look at his wrist" you point at. "Come on i'm hungry as hell and i know you are too let just order for three ok?"
Sukuna roll his eyes before throwing a pair of joggers in Satoru's way
"You eat and you get the fuck out of here." you clap your hands happily pressing a light kiss to your grumpy lover's cheek following him out of the room.
Satoru stays still for a while impressed at how easily you can bend him to your desire. He's not the one to blame Sukuna either; he too feels like he would jump off a moving train if you ask him.
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198 notes ¡ View notes
darkbluekies ¡ 1 year ago
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P.O.V
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Mafia!yandere OC x reader x mobboss
Summary: kidnapped by Silas’s rival, you're forced to see Silas's dark world from a point of view he never wanted you to witness
Warnings: yandere, kidnapping, gore, mentions of violation, mentions of nsfw?, violence, crime, manipulation, reader breaking, self guilt, angst, blackmail (let me know if i should add more)
Word count: 4.1k
“Let me go!” you shout as you struggle against the two men holding each of your arms in a painful grip. 
“Be silent”, one of them demands, “or I’ll cut your tongue off.”
You’re pushed down on your knees on polished, wooden floor. Quickly, you look around in the room you’ve been forced into. Is it an office? A living room? Just an hour ago, you were in the backseat of Silas’s car, waiting for him to finish a mission. You had been alone with two drivers who got shot before you could process it. It all went downhill from there.
A man walking from behind a desk catches your attention. He looks to be around Silas’s age with dark hair, dimples and piercing, blue eyes that makes you shrink.
“So this is Silas little playmate”, he smiles and grabs your chin to get a better look at you. 
Your neck strains. The man snickers and touches your lip with his thumb, almost waiting for you to open your mouth. If he forces his thumb past your lips, you’re going to bite him. Hard. Thankfully, he doesn’t. He crouches down in front of you and tilts his head. 
“You’re a pretty thing, aren’t you?” he asks tauntingly and caresses your cheek. 
You remember how terrified you were when you first came to Silas, how you barely dared to move. But now, after getting kidnapped a second time, you feel a bit bolder. You’ve already been put through hell and back, what more do you have to lose? You slap his hand away with a glare. 
“Feisty too”, he chuckles. “You’ll regret that, bunny.”
“What do you want?” you spit out. 
“I brought you here because your boyfriend hasn’t done his part of our agreement and I am sick of waiting.”
“What agreement?” 
“Just a simple business thing. Not much to fuss about … however, your boyfriend didn’t give me what I asked for after I gave him what he wanted. So … I took something he liked to trade for my part of the agreement. This time he has to fulfill his part.”
You take a deep breath. Silas will just have to come get you and then it’ll all be over. Everything will be okay. 
“But … I’m in the mood to kid around a little”, the man says in amusement. “I’m tired of Silas seeing me as a joke … send him one of his little playmate’s fingers.”
You flinch as your eyes widen. Quickly, you shoot up from the floor and you sprint towards the door in hopes of somehow saving yourself. The two men who dragged you in manage to grab you. You scream, kick and fight. On the leader’s signal, they let you go.The force makes you fly into the brick wall, hitting your elbow and head in the process. There’s a burning pain you have no time to care for. You sink down on the floor, pressing your body close to the wall, body trembling. Fear has crept into your heart by now. 
“I thought you’d be more brave”, the leader says. “Aren’t you the partner of a mob boss? Haven’t you already seen all the horrible stuff he does? Hasn’t he done them to you? Or is he the type to hide it all from his sweet, little, innocent darling? Answer.”
“He … he doesn’t show”, you stutter and swallow air. 
“Well, I am going to. I am going to ruin you for him. If he wants you all innocent and pure, I’m going to make sure he gets a destroyed partner back. That will make him second guess trying to mess with me in the future.”
You’re sure that your heart has sunken down to your stomach. If there’s something you’ve had to thank Silas for, it’s that he’s shielded you from all the horrible stuff he deals with. 
“Don’t look so scared, I’m not going to kill you”, the leader says as he moves closer. “You will go back to Silas, you have my word. I’m just going to roughen you up a little — show you a different side of the world you’re living in.”
You glare at him. The man drops his smile and walks back to his desk. 
“If you know what’s best for you, you’ll stay there like a passed out drunk”, he mutters. 
The men who dragged you in leave the room. You look around, but stay where you are. You have to get out somehow, have to escape. 
You’re not sure how much time pass, but when you no longer can feel your legs, the man stands up from his computer.
“What’s your name?” he asks. “Silas is a clever bastard, hiding your identity. And don’t you even try lying, I will know.”
You don’t answer.
“Give me your name or I will rip of your finger nails until I get letter for letter”, he says lowly and crouches down in front of you. “Do you understand that, bunny?”
“Y/N …”
“Are you lying?”
You shake your head quickly. The man grabs your collar and lifts you up on your numb legs. You falter before finding your steps. He holds a knife to your throat. 
“Scared?” he asks.
“N-No”, you lie. 
He scoffs with a smile and pulls you over to his desk. He stands behind you, trapping you between his muscular arms. There’s a video on his computer. The thumbnail is enough to make you sick. You can't tell that it is exactly, but there's blood and someone being tied to a chair.
"I don't want to", you gulp.
"You're going to watch every single video I show you, do you understand that?" the man whispers in your ear. "Or else I'm really going to cut one of your fingers off and send it to your boyfriend. I'm not kidding."
He reaches for the mouse.
"Please don't", you whisper weakly.
"Why? Are you afraid to see the truth of what your boyfriend is doing?"
"I-Is it Silas in the video?"
"No. He's not dumb enough to film his sessions, but I know for a fact that he does this kind of stuff too. Now, watch or I'll bring out the knife."
He presses play. The first thing you hear are echoes of sobs and moans. The entire screen is filled with a man missing limbs. Two masked men are torturing him far beyond what he can handle.
You clench your eyes shut and feel the man behind you grab a fistful of your hair before yanking your head back.
"I told you to watch, bitch", he says. "So watch."
He throws your head back. Whiplash is hitting you and you hold your hand over your throat. You continue to watch the video with tears running down your cheeks. The images burn into your brain. You won't be forgetting them any time soon.
"I must say, watching a video isn't the same as … actually experiencing it, don't you agree?" the man smirks.
You feel sick.
"Just get Silas", you say harshly, raising your voice. "Get him so I can leave!"
"Not yet, my little bunny", the man says and holds his heavy hand on your shoulder. "I'm not done yet. I'm going to taint you like you've never been tainted before. Better yet, I'll break you."
All his words make you shiver. The man grabs your arm and pulls you up from the chair. He drags you out of the room, through a pair of corridors and down a flight of stairs. The place you've ended up in reminds you of Silas’s basement … just much, much worse. People are playing games, drinking and doing drugs … all in the same room others are torturing people. Is this a red room or a casino?
"Spend ten minutes down here and you'll never be the same", the man chuckles and pushes you towards the group of people.
You stand still, not knowing what to do. Your body is not reacting to any of the signals your brain is telling you. You can't remember the last time you've been so scared.
Silas, help me. Please come help me. Save me. I'm so scared.
You've never wanted him to come for you this badly before. Normally, you want him as far away as possible.
"What are you waiting for?" the man behind you asks. "Walk around. Take it all in."
You don't move. It doesn't take long before you feel a push harsh enough to make you fall forward. You hit your knees on the stone floor.
"Oh my, look at this little thing", a seductive female voice murmurs. "Already on their hands and knees? Too easy."
You're quick to sit back on your butt and glare at the woman who talked to you. She's sitting by the bar with a few other women and men, all looking dolled up in old, torn clothing.
"Look at that innocent sparkle in their teary eyes", another woman snickers. 
"This is Silas sweetheart", the leader smiles from above you. 
The group of people by the bar raises their eyebrows.
"Silas, hm?" a man asks and jumps off his tall stool. "This is a bit too perfect."
"He must be paissed that you took them", the first woman laughs. "I'd pay to watch his face right now."
You look around, seeing all kinds of horrors. People experiences the worst side effects from substances, people fighting, blood, torture … it all belongs in a nightmare.
Silas, please …
You start to sob even worse. If this is a nightmare, you want to wake up.
"Yes, that's it", the leader smirks.
He's quick to pull up his camera and film you sitting in a fetal position. The women who taunted you crawl over and put their grubby hands on you.
"Let me go!" you scream and fight them off. "Don't touch me!"
"See something you recognize, Silas?" you hear the man ask. "Y/N turn around and tell your dear boyfriend how badly you want him to save you."
You don't want to give into the man's disgraceful request. It's humiliating, but you're terrified. You want nothing more than for Silas to save you.
The women grab your face, turning it to the camera.
"Come on, Y/N …", the leader says playfully. "Do it."
The women twist your arms and you scream.
"Stop it!" you scream in agony. "Silas, help me, please!"
The man chuckles and cuts off the video before sending it. It doesn't take long before his phone rings.
"Silas!" he says with a twisted smile. 
"What the fuck have you done?!" Silas screams back. 
"I wouldn't have to do this if you had fulfilled your end of the promise, Silas. I want my documents. And you're going to give them to me if you want Y/N back."
"You'll get your fucking papers. Tell me where and I'll be there now."
"Oh, not now. I'm too busy. How about tomorrow at five pm?" 
"No, now."
"I'm not done with your darling yet. I have so much to show them."
"Show what? What are you doing?"
"If you're going to bring Y/N into this world, why not show them what you've dragged them into?"
Silence. 
"You can't", Silas says. "You wouldn't fucking dare."
"Oh, but I've already started. Tomorrow at five pm, the old warehouse. Bring only two men and I'll do the same. No weapons, no tricks."
"Fine. But you'll pay for this, trust me."
The man chuckles and hangs up. He turns to you and bends down to lift you up in his arms. 
"Tomorrow at five pm you'll be free", he says as he carries you out of the basement.
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It's the third man he's beaten to death. Silas’shand is throbbing with pain and he doesn't know if the blood on it is his own or the poor men's — most likely both. He's not done yet. Everyone should feel his wrath. Even the devil must be afraid of Silas right now. He hasn’t looked  himself in the mirror and perhaps he shouldn’t. 
“Boss …”, his right hand man says quietly, not raising his head to look at his boss. “It’s just a few hours … please try to remain calm-”
“Just a few hours?” Silas scoffs and swipes everything on his desk down on the floor. “Do you know what can happen in ‘just a few hours’?! Y/N could very well be dead when I get there!”
“I don’t think they’ll kill them … in that case they won’t get the documents. He’s very persistent on getting the documents.”
He goes pale. “Yeah, you’re right … but … Y/N … they could violate them in any way … and I won’t be able to stop it …”
Silas sinks down on his knees. Every cell in his body lost their adrenaline, leaving him aching and hurting. He can feel his heart breaking in pieces, feel it bleeding into his lungs. He’s terrified of the condition he’s going to find you in. 
“Boss”, second in command tries again. His voice is gentle and sympathizing. “Don’t think like that. Y/N is strong … and smart. You know that.”
“But I never pushed past Y/N’s limits. They don’t care about their well being, they won’t stop. Even if they scream, cry and beg … they won’t care.” He leans his head against the wall. “I should never have left Y/N alone in the car …”
“You could never have known that they’d break into it.”
“I knew I fucked up the second I saw the dead drivers. But it was too late … how could I let those assholes take Y/N?”
“You tried to shield them by letting them stay in the car. Otherwise they’d have to see you kill someone.”
“Seems like they’ll have to watch that now anyway.” Silas clenches his bloody fists. “I’m going to kill that little insect for ever trying to mess with me. I’m going to end him for touching my Y/N.”
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The night have been filled with more than you've ever anticipated. That man made sure that you were going to see as much terror as you possibly could. From watching people get limbs cut off to burned and filled with acid. You could never have imagined someone melting … or imagined the smell.
I just need to hold out. Hold out until it's over. Just a few hours.
The hours drag on by like snails. You're curled up in a corner of the office with the leader by the computer. Your body is trembling. The person you were yesterday feels so distant, so different. 
"Very well, it's time to wrap up our little visit", the muscular man says. "And for you to return to Silas."
"What if he doesn't … come to pick me up?" you whisper, mortified by your own words.
What if he doesn't want you anymore now that he knows that you won't be pure anymore? You'll know it all, you'll be tainted.
"Then I'll keep you", the mob boss answers with a grin. "I'll force you to watch everything until your fragile brain breaks. Can't wait to see you numb and unresponsive. Get up."
Slowly, you pull yourself up on your feet. You feel sick to your stomach, the images of the night's horror still visible in front of your eyes. They never had to touch you, they could break you nonetheless.
The man grabs your arm and pulls you with him, out of the room, out of the building. You’re forced into the backseat of a gray car. You keep your head down the entirety of the bumpy ride. You’re exhausted, hungry and broken. Even if Silas gets you, you won’t be the same. It won’t matter if he comes. It’s too late. 
You’re pulled out of the car and forced into an old, abandoned warehouse. 
“Now … let’s wait”, the man says and holds you still. “Silas will be here soon enough.”
Not even ten minutes later, you can hear the screeching of a sports car’s breaks. You look up, seeing Silas and two of his men walk into the warehouse. The sight of him makes you tear up. You’re so relieved that he came to get you, but you’re so ashamed of what you’ve become — what you let that horrible man do to you. Silas is wearing his suit and dark coat, hands buried in his pockets. You have never seen such a dark expression on his face before. His face twitches as he sees you and he clenches his jaw. 
“Let’s make this quick before I kill you with my bare hands”, Silas says coldly and gesticulates for his men to give him the documents. “Give me what’s mine now.”
“The papers first”, the man says calmly and takes a tighter, warning grip on your arm. “Afterwards I’ll return your sweetheart.”
Silas clenches his jaw and throws the folder carelessly on the ground. One of the men beside you takes the folder and the leader lets you go. Without hesitation, you run towards the man you earlier didn’t want anything to do with. Silas opens his arms for you and you run right into them, crashing into his firm body. He wraps his arms around you, holding your head into his chest. You're not going to have to see anymore horror — he'll make sure of it. He lets you cry while stroking your back. Heavy sobs exit your shaking body, causing his heart to bleed thickly. You breathe in Silas familiar scent and cry even harder. He holds you firmly, mortified of having you slip away from him again. He wants to say something, wants to do so much worse than that man ever did to you, but he can’t. He doesn't want to put you through even more pain, doesn't even want to let you go. 
“I don’t understand that angry look, Silas”, the mob boss taunts him. “You brought them into this world, you should have known this was inevitable. Actually, you should thank me. I did all the job for you, you didnt have to watch their breakdown.”
Keep calm. 
Silas bites the insides of his cheeks to avoid saying something that can escalate the situation. He doesn’t want to scare you any further. If he's going to beat him to death, it's going to be out of your sight.
“Let's leave”, he mutters lowly and puts his arm around your shoulders. “We’re done here.”
Silas gives him one last glare before he pulls you with him out of the warehouse. He fights back every impulse to turn back and beat that pick senseless.
“Tell me about what they did to you”, he whispers to you. “Did they hurt you badly?”
You shake your head again without lifting your face out of his warm chest. He breathes out in relief. He had imagined the worst. What would he have done if they had given you forever physical damage?
“They forced me to watch … w-watch people get killed”, you whisper, scared to even raise your voice an octave. “In all different kind of ways … it was horrible. I could never have imagined that people could do such things to each other …” you hug yourself when your stomach growls. “I also didn’t get to eat anything and every time I was about to wall asleep they hurt me to keep me stay awake … I have bruises …”
“The bruises will heal, I promise”, he says comfortingly. “I will cover all the mirrors in the house, you won’t have to watch yourself if you don’t want to.”
You sniffle. “Thank you …”
“Of course, baby.”
Silas is in pure disbelief over how someone can treat an angel like you this way. You had nothing to do with his work, you are completely innocent … how could they do this to you? The mere thought makes him see red. The mob boss’s taunting words dance around in his brain like annoying mosquitos. It wasn’t his fault, Silas tells himself, he didn’t bring you into the world, he kept you out of it. He shielded you!
Your legs cave in once you reach the car. He helps you into the backseat and buckles you in, wiping a few tears on the way. He’s about to crawl in after you, but he stops himself. 
“Keep an eye on them”, he demands the two men he brought with him. “I have to tell that son of a bitch one thing.”
“Should we come with you, boss?” one of the men asks. 
“No, keep an eye on Y/N. And I mean a really close eye. I’ll be fine. They don’t have weapons.”
You break out in broken sobs and reach for him. “N-No, don’t leave me!” you scream. 
“I’ll be back in a minute, baby”, he says softly and kisses your cheek. “If I don’t tell that man my mind, I’ll regret it big time.”
Silas closes the car door and runs back to the warehouse. He storms over to the man and lunges his fist as hard as he possibly can towards his face. The other man stumbles and loses his balance. His men come towards Silas, but he manages to send them flying as well. He hopes that they hit their heads hard enough to never wake up again, but frankly he doesn’t care. It’s not them he wants to get at — it’s their horrible, disgusting leader. He continues to force his fist into the mob boss’s face until he no longer moves. Silas wants to kill him. He’s going to kill him.
“You should never have been so stupid to touch what’s mine”, Silas pants and stands up to reload his stamina.
He is filled with adrenaline and won’t stop until the mob boss is dead. He punches on and on and on again until he’s sure the man is dead. He spits at the man’s corpse and storms back to the car. Quickly, he removes his bloody coat and wipes his hands on it to not scare you any further. Silas hurries to get into the backseat and hold your trembling body in his hands. 
“You’re safe now”, he whispers in your ear. “Don’t cry, I’m here now and everything is going to be okay. He’s not a threat anymore. You don’t have to worry.”
You look at him with big, glossy, red eyes. How is anything going to be okay when you're no longer the person he fell in love with?
"I'm sorry", you sob.
"Sorry?" Silas asks in confusion and he feels his heart break all over again. How could you ever think such a thing? "Why are you sorry? You haven't done anything wrong, little thing, don’t even say that. I should be apologizing for ever leaving you alone in the car. I should have trusted my gut and not have brought you on that stupid mission. The car has been upgraded, they’ll never manage to break in again. Not that I will ever leave you alone in it again …"
He takes your hand and lifts it to his lips, kissing desperately. The guilt he’s feeling is greater than anything he’s ever felt before. It’s a feel piercing through his heart.
“I hate to see you so upset … tell me what I can do to make you better”, he pleads and cramps onto your hands. “I will give you anything you want, nothing is too much … I could even allow you to meet your parents …”
At the moment, all you want is to take a break until your brain works again.
“I just want to sleep”, you sniffle and shake your head. “I’m so tired, I haven’t slept at all …”
In other words, you want to escape this living nightmare in hopes of finding it easier in dreamland. They kept you awake all night to force you to watch those horrible events and videos. If you weren’t too mortified to be sleepy, they’d push, kick or pull your hair hard enough to make you wide awake. 
“Of course”, Silas answers quickly and positions himself right. “Sleep on my shoulder, darling.”
You hesitate. You don’t want to be unaware, what if something happens again? But … you’re so tired … 
“Nothing is going to happen to you”, Silas reassures you as if he could read your mind. “I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere, do you understand that?”
You nod carefully.
“I’ll never let that happen to you again”, Silas says firmly and kisses your forehead. “You have nothing to be afraid of. I’m right here by your side.”
“Promise?”
“I promise. Just rest, baby.”
You lean your head onto his shoulder and shut your eyes slowly. He holds his arm around your shoulders to keep you in place, even bringing his coat around you. Continuously, he kisses your forehead while fighting back tears. It grows like a ball in his throat, but he refuses to cry. You are safe and that bastard is dead, he tells himself.
It’s all over … but his rage is still burning inside his lungs. He’s not done yet.
1K notes ¡ View notes
jm-2406 ¡ 7 months ago
Text
Just a ring.
Summary - “he has asked me to marry him but I had to come here first. I need to know if you feel anything… anything at all for me.”
Pairing - Theodore Nott x reader; Male OC x reader.
Word count - 2150.
Warnings - infidelity, flashbacks in italics, grown up theo & reader.
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Cursive words made their way across the document as he led the pen from left to right, every movement a study in perfection. A famous business wizard like Theodore Nott who hailed from a high class pure blood family, couldn't afford anything less than perfection. He pursed his lips as he focused on getting his signature just right, reading the already typed composition. Mergers, especially one as important as this one needed to be dealt with utmost care, and a very carefully crafted ‘brown nosing’ letter never hurt anyone.
He was feeling very pleased with his efforts when a loud noise from outside his office startled him. Throwing an angry glare towards the closed door, he cursed the person who disturbed him.
“You can't go in there Miss. He's very busy.” His secretary's voice reached his ears. “To hell with his schedule. I don't care.” The other voice responded sharply and he knew who that other person was. He mentally prepared himself for the upcoming drama, tiredly rubbing his eyes.
“I'm sorry Mr. Nott, this—this Woman refused to make an appointment. Should I escort her out?”
Theodore eyed the girl in front of him; she stared back defiantly, challenging him. He wouldn't throw her out but that didn't mean that he couldn't make her sweat. The young woman in front of him started to fidget nervously the longer Theodore kept staring at her without a word. “It's okay Riya. You're excused.” The woman heaved a sigh of relief at his words.
Theodore turned to her and said coldly. “Now, to what do I owe the pleasure? What is it, [Y/L/N]? Say your piece and spare me. I am too busy to hear your rambling right now.”
[Y/N] scoffed, wrapping her arms around herself as if she was trying to protect herself from his coldness. “Wow. So you can speak more than three words at a time and just my luck that you use them to dismiss me. ‘[Y/L/N]’, ‘my piece’... You are so intolerable Theodore.”
“Then why are you here, love?” He retorted flippantly but her next words made him stop his work.
“He knows…”
“Who knows what, [Y/N]?”
“Alex… he found your waistcoat under the bed… the one you forgot to put on because of some ‘important’ business.” She confessed, her voice shaky. She paused and then opened her mouth to continue, her voice cracking. “He didn't even ask who it belonged to. He said that it didn't matter. He blamed himself, you know…For being gone so often.”
Theodore kept staring at the papers on his desk, completely still. He didn't know what kind of response she was expecting but his mind went blank. He was about to say something when she dropped the final bomb. “He has asked me to marry him.”
Her eyes finally rose up from the floor. He could feel her willing him to look back at her; willing him to show any emotion. But the man kept staring at his desk, forcing himself to pick up the document and continue his letter.
“I haven't answered him yet.” She admitted, “I had to come here first. I had to see you, but you've been avoiding me and… I just need to know if you feel anything, anything at all for me.” She waited for him to respond, waited for any sign from him but he was as cold as ice and just as frozen as he signed his name at the end of his letter.
He continued his work robotically and took a breath only after hearing her footsteps shuffling closer to the door. “I meant what I said that night… I still do.” She whispered and then she was gone, missing the look that crossed his face.
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After crying her heart out, [Y/N] kept staring at the end of the room blankly, her mind still stuck on everything that has happened in her life recently. “I am stronger than this.” She whispered to herself. Her head fell against the back of the couch, and she curled a leg up beside her, wrapping her arms around it as she glanced out the window.
It never should have happened, she knew that now, but she still couldn't bring herself to regret that it had. It had all started about six months ago, she and Alex had been having a lot of arguments around that time.
“You promised!” She raised her voice, fed up with his attitude.
“I know babe but this is urgent.” Alex said softly, trying to pacify her but it made her angrier instead.
“Fine. Go wherever you want to. Do whatever you want. But I am not going to keep changing my plans according to you every time. I am going to attend the Christmas Eve party… with or without you.”
“No. You can't do that [Y/N]. What will they say? My reputation will be thrashed.”
“Oh I can and I will. If you care about your ‘reputation’ then come to the event with me.” She asked one last time but only got a shake of head in return as Alex took his briefcase and apparated.
There at the party, [Y/N] found herself in the company of none other than Theodore Nott, one of the Slytherin guys from a year above her. She had never interacted with him outside of the classes. Though she didn't trust him, she couldn't disagree that the man was charming. A few drinks later, she found herself up against a wall in one of the vast deserted hallways, moaning and thoroughly enjoying herself with a man that most definitely was not her boyfriend. That was how it all started.
Secret correspondence and casual meetings followed. Every time she would receive one of his notes or calls, she would hesitate and every time she gave in. She couldn't stop herself; he made her feel passionate, naughty, and desirable. It was everything she never felt with Alex thus she became addicted.
Over time, their pattern seemed to change. It started with simple words after they were intimate and soon she found herself spending nights in his house. It went to a point where she would see Alex maybe once in two or three weeks for a date and spend almost every other day with Theodore.
After sometime she realized that her feelings for the two men had begun to change. Theodore had become her confidant and lover. On the other hand she found herself forgetting about the dates with Alex, arriving late when he called her, zoning out when he talked to her. She was figuring out what to do when the unexpected happened.
They were lying in his bed, quietly content after a night full of activity when her lips, engaged by a sleepy mind, betrayed her. “I think… I love you.” Time froze. In one swift movement, her lover had stood from the bed and had placed his robe around his shoulders, apparating away.
She remembered how she had sat there; hurt and humiliated beyond belief. It had taken all the strength and courage that she could muster to get dressed and leave that night. That was two weeks ago.
Truth to be told, when Alex had found Theodore's waistcoat under her bed, she felt relieved. Everything would be out in the open, she could move on but once again reality turned out to be quite different than her thoughts. Alex opened up to her about his behaviour and promised to work less, be with her more and that he wanted to marry her. Before she could blink, he was down on his knee, proposing to her.
“I… I need time, Alex.”
Now here she was, lamenting unrequited love and cursing her fate.
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A week later -
[Y/N] pushed open the door of her flat with a tired sigh. She tossed her shoes into their space in her coat closet with one hand as she released the clip that held her hair with the other. Moving towards the kitchen cabinet, she uncorked the wine bottle and took a sip directly from the bottle.
“Long day?” A deep voice asked her.
She turned on her feet and observed the man in front of her. Theodore was sitting on the couch as if he owned the place. “What. Do. You. Want?” She asked slowly, proud of the bitterness in her voice. “Theodore…”
He didn't verbally respond; calling her to him with a gesture of his hands. She wanted to shout at him but she couldn't. He made her weak. He reached up with his fingers for her left hand, his thumb brushing over the plain gold band that sat there.
“I'm engaged…” She tried to stop the teasing fingertips from continuing their journey of exploring her body.
“Well… you're not married yet. It's just a ring.” He whispered, holding her face to make her look at him. She felt the pads of his fingertips gripping the ring on her third finger and slowly sliding it off. A metallic clink resonated in her ears as the ring fell to the floor.
The fight drained out of her as she sunk into her lover's arms. Her knees folding under her as his lips joined with hers. She knew that this night would be their final goodbye.
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“Where is your engagement ring?”
“I… I must have forgotten it.”
“Forgotten it? On the night of our engagement party?” Alex questioned incredulously. They were interrupted by some other guests and they easily fell into the conversation, saving [Y/N] from trying to come up with more lies.
“How are you doing, Codnor?” Another voice interrupted the couple. Alex cursed seeing the person who disturbed his conversation with his fiancèe.
“How did you even enter, Nott? This is an invitation only party so kindly leave before I kick you out.”
Theodore smirked, raising his closed fist over [Y/N]'s glass of champagne. One by one he uncurled his fingers, dropping something small and shiny. Alex had a look of confusion and shock on his features as he realized that in the glass was [Y/N]'s engagement ring.
“I know I wasn't invited, Codnor, but I am here to collect what's mine… don't look so shocked. She hasn't been yours for a while.”
Before she could think, Alex punched Theodore, hard… and a fight started between the two. Alex's parents changed the topic and sent the guests on their way to save their image of respectful people. It wasn't until [Y/N] physically pulled Theodore back that he stopped. Even though Alex was almost as tall as Theodore, he was no match for his muscles and strength.
“When did this… this thing start? Tell me everything, [Y/N]… honestly this time.” Alex pleaded.
“Six months ago. I was angry at you and I know it is wrong but… when I did go to the party, alone, no one paid any attention to me. Didn't even greet me with a simple ‘hello’. I felt as though I was only someone if I was with you. I felt so worthless. Theodore was at the party. He annoyed me and I took my anger out on him… I don't know how but the next thing I remember is kissing him; one thing lead to another and here we are… I am sorry Alex. I don't deserve you.”
Alex scoffed. He left immediately after throwing the ring down. His mouth did not say a word but his eyes conveyed the anger and disgust he was feeling at her.
[Y/N] turned to Theodore. “Well. It was a long day. Thank you for ruining my engagement party. Now I think we should go.” She stood from her chair but Theodore pulled her back by her wrist, making her sit on his lap. “What is it?” She asked him.
“You asked me that day, if I feel anything at all for you. The answer is, I don't. I feel everything for you, Miss [Y/N] [Y/L/N].” He said cupping her face in his hands and pressed his lips on hers.
She smiled in their kiss knowing for sure that the man whom she gave her heart to would do everything in his power to keep her safe and happy now that he finally realised what she meant to him.
THE END.
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Note - i have written a Tommy Shelby version of this one, you can find it here if you are interested. I thought this one screams “Theo” so why not make a Theo version too.
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cozzzynook ¡ 2 months ago
Note
Little Cyberverse angst
Hot Rod heads into Bumblebee's room as he hasn't come out of his room in days and is starting to worry everyone. He gentle knocks on the door before stepping side, his face scrunches up as a sickly sweet scent fills the room despite having the lights dark and dimmed. Hot Rod steps inside calling out for Bee as he explores the hab being carefully not to knock anything off the shelves as he makes his way towards the berth room.
"Bee you in here? I just want to talk-" Hot Rod felt his energon run cold as he opened the door only to see Bumblebee lying on the floor holding something small in his arms. Quickly rushing to Bumblebee's side Hot Rod started to check over while also sending an emergency comm to Ratchet, "Hey, hey! Bumblebee wake up, what's wrong?!" Roddy felt his intake go dry as Bee let out a quiet whimper as he sluggishly opens his optics before turning to look up his brother. "R-Roddy?....what are y-you doing here?" The yellow mech gave another pained whimper before pulling something closer to his frame.
Before Hot Rod could answer he turned his attention towards the smaller shape hearing a muffled noise coming from it. He let out a sharp gasp as he spotted a sparkling fussing and trying to bury their face into Bee's chest while their tiny wings flicked in annoyance. "You were sparked?" Roddy carefully took a hold of the tiny sparkling checking them over before returning his attention back to his brother who now had a guilty expression. Sensing the tension the red mech allowed his EM field to fill the room in as an attempt to comfort Bumblebee. "Did you manage to feed them before you collapsed?" Roddy gentle petted the sparkling's back as they began to settle down as he gave a sheepish smile. Bee gave a shaky sigh before nodding. "I-I did...they didn't drink m-much though" Just then Ratchet finally arrived and quickly went to work checking over Bumblebee.
Hours passed and Hot Rod still haven't got any word how his brother or his sparkling were doing. Letting out a sigh he rose to his pedes and began taking a short walk towards the brig feeling his plating burn with confusion, worry and so many questions. Hot Rod had an idea who the possible Sire was and why Bee was so adamant that Optimus didn't find out despite struggling with his carrying and sparkling. After a short walk Roddy found himself entering the brig and heading towards a prison cell, taking a deep breath he allowed his plating to flatten before stepping in front of the cell. "Starscream, we need to talk" The seeker who was busy writing on a data pad suddenly jumped before giving a slight confused scowl, quickly putting the data pad down Starscream walked over with crossed arms. "Well what do I owe the pleasure Hot Rod? You never pay any other prisoner a friendly visit" Hot Rod felt his amour flare slightly as he gritted his teeth as he tried to remain his cool. "Cut the scrap screamer, I have a serious question to ask" Roddy saw the seeker raise a brow as he tapped his digits along his arms. "Did you and Bumblebee have a secret fling going on? Because my brother is currently in the Med Bay with a sparkling that suspiciously looks like a seeker" Hot Rod almost wanted to snort with laughter when he saw Starscream's optics go wide while his wings suddenly dropped out of pure shock.
Meanwhile Bumblebee was sitting quietly on the med berth holding his sparkling who was quietly napping. He let out a sigh feeling guilt and worry sink into his park. "What am I going to tell your Grandcarrier my little firefly?" He let out a sigh before carefully pulling the small bitty closer so he can nuzzle them, he gave small smile when they snuggled up closer. "Your Carrier is a bolt headed idiot, but I promise you'll be okay no matter what"
{Hope you enjoyed}
Poor Bee
I’m so glad Roddy found him and that Starscream genuinely loves bee and already loves their bitty ( he is the type i just know it ) but poor bee and star
Star probably purposely got caught or is purposely staying there to be close to bee since he was worried about him and now he knows his worry was for a good reason.
Oooh i wonder how optimus will react.
Such lengths been went through, i wonder how catastrophic things will be or if Bee just put too much pressure on it.
I love this, thank you 😊
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alwaysshallow ¡ 1 year ago
Text
gorgeous, part 4
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Simon "Ghost" Riley x f!reader
You decide to have some fun; you also talk to old friends. (3,3k)
READ ON AO3
previous part || next part
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It's surprising how many times you see him, actually.
It's surprising because you thought – if you're lucky – it's gonna be after six months, on a check-up visit. Technically, he had no business to be here, especially considering how hidden he was, how he wasn't the type to chit-chat. It was okay, you didn't mind it.
And the day after he texted you, when you close clinic, you could see him right in front of the building, his hands in pockets, looking straight at you. It was a hypnotising experience though, especially when you walked in his direction, your knees like marshmellows, and he was still looking.
"Your mechanic was pretty nice." you said, tilting your head. "He said it's gonna be done in two weeks or less since he has work to do."
"Mhm." he matched your pace, walking with you side by side. "Finally doing something with it, aren't we?" he raised his eyebrow.
You laughed. "You make me look like I'm a bad car owner."
"Am I? Or that's just your thoughts?"
His comment made you open your mouth in pure disbelief at his honesty – you nudged him with before realizing how he could react at that gesture. He wasn't exactly a touchy-feely person, but there was no comment from him, so you were glad.
"Mean." you murmured, amused.
"'st speaking my mind, Addison."
"Uh-huh. That's why you're here? To speak your mind?"
He sighed, his eyes on the road in front of you. "You really like asking questions, don't you?"
"I like knowing things. Don't you?" you mimicked his low tone.
"I like knowing things. But I don't ask questions if I'm certain." he answered, straightening his back; a cracking sound that came out automatically made you shiver. "It's just walking you home. 's all, as I said, Sparkles would hate to have another vet."
"Right. Safety reasons, yeah?"
"Good girl. Learning so fast."
Motherfucker knew how to get to you – just after this comment, you had absolutely nothing to say, which made him visibly amused; his brow cocked, and he let out a low chuckle, looking away from you again. Thankful for the darkness, you just walked with him to start another topic after a while – about his cat, of course.
You had to leave 'good girl' behind, to not provoke him to say more because he could easily find out that nickname works for you perfectly. Especially if someone is British, especially if someone is just alluring as him.
And he had blonde hair. A bit curly. That's literally the recipe for a disaster.
After that interaction, he was walking you off to your apartment, day by day. It wasn't surprising after three first times – you just knew he's gonna be here, but you caught yourself looking for him, interested.
Not like you cared – at least that's what you told yourself – but it was curiosity speaking since you knew he was doing that just because of your car. Just because he somehow cared, just because he wanted to know you're safe.
Cute.
What was less cute though, you had to talk with Celia. You just had to and there was no excuse since your car already was in another mechanic's garage. And, Simon knew that you needed to talk with her, so he would ask about it eventually, so dodging the situation wasn't a plan, no. Not when he'd laugh the shit out of you, he did enough with implying you're not taking proper care of your car.
He had a point, though.
You took a few hours off in the morning, leaving Bernie on her own, just to see Celia – you even had your guilt cookies, big jar in your purse. It's not a surprise for anyone who knows you that you bake when stressed, and you certainly were stressed before this meeting. She could tell you anything; and it wouldn't be such a surprise if she'd tell you to go to hell.
A hope was there, though. Not only Simon said it, but when you thought it, it would be a real shame to ruin a friendship, running ten years, just because of a toxic guy that wasn't worth it. Not only that, your best friend had all the right to say I told you so.
You knew you kinda deserved that for being such a blind bitch.
Knock to her door came after a minute of staring dumbily at them, like it would help in something, or if she would magically open it without you knocking. It was a quiet knock though; shy one because, truthfully, you wanted to sprint from her house as far as possible. Confrontation? Not your best quality, no. Not at least in situation like these, when you know you have to apologize from the bottom of your heart.
A minute passed, and you knocked again, louder this time. You started considering walking away you thought maybe she wasn't home, but right after that, no one but Celia opened the door. Her eyebrows furrowed, arms were crossed against her chest, and you immediately knew what her attiude is.
Jesus Christ, it couldn't be easy, could it?
"Hi, Celia. Got a minute?" you asked; hesitantly. She could slam her door in your face, after all.
"Depends. You here because of the car?"
You sighed. "I'm here because I want to apologize, actually."
She seemed surprised as you said it; nonetheless, she let you in, leading you to kitchen. It was the main place of talks in her house, you could say that – not living room, not dining room, kitchen. Very big one, pretty, a table with two seats by side, so you sat there with her, clearing your throat. Wondering how to start.
How do you start conversation like that?
You had the simplest words on your mind. "I was a bitch." rolled off your tongue without even thinking. "I still am, though – but I was a bitch to you when I shouldn't have been. You wanted the best for me, and I just... well, I'm not proud of what I did. I should listen, not throw hands at you. It's not how it was supposed to be, it's not how I wanted it to be. Like, I know also that I should apologize way, way earlier, but-"
"Addie, c'mon." redhead interrupted you with a wave of her hand. "We're both bitches, we literally fought like fuckin' kids. Let me ask you one thing, you done?"
"With him?"
"Yeah, with that scumbag."
"Funny. You're the second person who talks of him this way" you mused, remembering this one situation with Simon. "Done, yeah. For five months right now."
Celia was silent for a moment, obviously analyzing the situation she found herself in; then, with a sigh, she looked again at you, her expression unreadable.
"Good to have your ass back on board, sister." she murmured, smiling a bit.
Next thing she did, was hitting your arm with such power that you let out a little 'ow', laughing with her in the same moment.
"Deserved." she pointed at you. "I apologize too, though. I could be better, I could just... well, tell you everything a bit differently. Not so harsh, you were in love with that prick." your friend muttered, rolling her eyes. "Okay, enough of apologies, though. Who said he's a douche, though? That person might be my second best friend."
So, you told her – almost everything, saving little details about his appearance or aura to yourself; Celia was a pretty fan of him, especially his snarkiness and comments. Yet, she was a bit jealous that you had the audacity to bring your car to other mechanic; mostly, she was jealous of the car, not you.
Her baby, as she liked to tell everyone. She picked it out for you from her uncle, repaired it, added some "cool shit" (it's a mystery what cool shit is, you didn't ask though).
Nonetheless, she was more than glad that you managed to find someone who's gonna help you with that, and you came to her purely to fix something between you two.
A friendship that – you promised yourself – would live through everything, no matter what would happen, no matter of circumstances. She was your person, just like Rosalie.
Who, speaking of, left million voice messages on your phone on your way back to clinic, so you considered it the perfect ocassion to listen to them all.
Apart from her excitement on your car situation, she invited you to her local bar for... a party. You didn't exactly know what party was about, or if it was just a casual hangout, but you agreed to go. It's been a while since you took a break from clinic and actually spent your night out, not under some blanket, watching movies with a bowl of chips or icecream.
Not like it was bad. Not at all. Sometimes you just needed a... change in your routine.
Rosalie promised to pick you up since your car was still at mechanic's – so, your only task was to look good, but not too good. Bar was something else than club; more casual, but you really wanted to at least flirt a little or to catch an eye on someone, even if your mind was... pretty occupied with certain someone.
Maybe your best friend would bring someone worth your time, yeah? She usually had some ideas and wanted to play as your little matchmaker, so you never knew what was coming.
That being said, you opened your closet.
It was almost embarrasing how many clothes you had that you didn't even wear more than one time; mostly, cocktail dresses for fancy ocassions since your parents insisted on buying something new. People of business, someone would say – always having a whim about their galas and shit like this, it was hard not to hate it, considering that business comes before family, mostly.
Maybe that's why you limited contacts with them, sending them a text or two of what you're doing, how's the clinic going. And, of course, Christmas with them or Thanksgiving was a must if they weren't on some fancy vacations abroad.
With a thought in your mind that you have to go through those dressed, you decided to pick something simple to bar. Black tank-top, a simple baby blue shirt on it (unbuttoned, of course) and a pair of simple jeans worked in your mind, as well as in reality, so you found yourself quickly putting on a pair of sneakers.
Your make up took a little longer; you paid attention to your skin, the perfect eyeliner, a delicate lipgloss bringing out the shape of your lips. Everything had to look effortless, even if it wasn't; your motto, basically.
As promised, Rosalie picked you up; and you've talked with her the whole road, almost two hours to be exact. You haven't seen her for two months straight and even if you were updating her as much as you could in a day, it wasn't even close to your sincere talks. She asked a whole palette of questions; how's your car, how's that Simon who rescued you from jerky ex; she looked a bit amused when topic was on him, but you had no idea why.
"Man that has good ideas is rare" she summed up, chuckling, when you catched her up with Celia situation and told her your car is going to be fine, you just have to pick it up in the next week. "Don't tell him that by any means. His ego wouldn't take it."
"Oh, you have no idea."
Soon enough, you arrived. Bar was cute; not too large, but with big-ass bar table and glass shelves behind it with amount of alcohol that you couldn't count, even if you wanted to. Dim, orange lights just added to the view, and you smiled under your nose instincitvely, happy that you've decided to go there.
Tables weren't occupied as you thought they would be; Rosalie mentioned earlier it's gonna be a private party, but you didn't think that private, considering that you could count like... maybe ten, eleven people. Military men with their significant others, as you saw when you walked up to the barman, ordering a drink for you and your best friend.
You couldn't obviously ignore that someone was discussing with MacTavish near you; seemed like a heated discussion, until they looked right at you.
Guy with a skull mask. Full-ass skull mask like Simon had this one day when you two...
Fuck, could it be him? Maybe he was in unit that wore masks like these, you thought. It would be a strange coincidence, wouldn't it? And, Rosalie for sure would tell you that her comrade is the guy you are talking about sometimes since he adopted a cat, Sparkles, yeah?
Rosa had her significant smirk when she looked at you, and it was all you needed to know, especially when men approached you both.
Trouble in a person, that would be on your best friend.
"He gets a bit shy around strangers. Ain't your fault" Johnny joked, nudging you with his shit-eating grin, as he gave his friend a look.
"Mm, I bet. Good to see you, MacTavish." you murmured, which made "stranger" roll his eyes and grumble something under his nose. "And what's your friends name?" you raised an eyebrow, making eye-contact with those brown eyes you wouldn't forget ever.
"His name-"
"-you know my name, doc." Simon said, interrupting Soap. He took off his mask with one, swift movement, to reveal to you his scarred face and disheveled, blonde hair that you wanted to dip your fingers in so desperately.
To say that Johnny was shocked, was the understatement; he looked at his comrade in shock, opening and closing his lips, like he wasn't exactly sure what to say, considering that he took off his scary mask.
"Didn't know you have friends in military."
"Apparently, we're both full of surprises" you sipped a bit of your margharita, shrugging, like you two meeting here was the most normal situation that could happen.
"You two know each other, no?" Soap meddled in conversation, observing you two. It was obvious that he doesn't really know how you two could met, and honestly, no one could blame him. He was in military, barely going out, and you were a simple vet.
You nodded. "We met, yeah."
"Oh, I'd really want to hear it."
"Simple help. Nothin' too fancy, MacTavish" he pointed out, taking a sip of his alcohol.
Soap's look was piercing in you, though. "Helped him with a cat. Simple, like he said." "Fuckin' cat? Ghost is a cat mom now, eh?" he chuckled, which made Simon roll his eyes.
You wondered if Ghost was something they named them in the field, and if yes, why? After all, everything always was supposed to fit. As Rosalie said to you, even if she couldn't tell you everything (classified, of course) every nickname had a meaning behind it.
Ghost... seemed ambigious. You couldn't put it anywhere.
"Better than you'd be, John. Let's drink, shall we?" you raised your eyebrow, trying to lead the conversation elsewhere; looked like your companion thought the same way.
Rosalie introduced you to rest of the team – they all told you their names, but you were sure as hell that you're not gonna remember that, considering your memory was shit, especially to people that you don't see often. Either way, they were nice; very nice, after a few drinks with them you were pretty sure that your platonic soulmate is Kyle Garrick, who was the best partner in karaoke. And, he was also such a gossiper, finding every ocassion that he could to talk to you about something.
Not military related, though; only "things for civilians" as he giggled to you after fifth shot of tequila, telling you something about a girl that he had eye on. Curiosity piqued in the moment he confessed that she was 'out of reach' for him, and it was no chance that he could get together with her.
Hell, for you "no chance" before even trying was non-existent. You loved to prove people wrong, to make them watch you accomplishing various of things just to rile them up, or to reach your goal.
"Don't say that" you pointed at him. "There's always a chance for something. You won't try, you won't know. That's it."
"It's the same chance, as the chance that Ghost will get any of us to that fancy gala. Non-existent." he groaned, burying dramatically his head in his hands. "And like his driving skills."
"Garrick" he murmured; low, rumbling voice made sergeant straighten a little. "'s enough talkin' of it, yes?"
You chuckled. "What gala? And what, your driving skills are that bad?"
"I have rather..." Simon played with glass filled with alcohol "...complicated relationship with cars, I'd say. I prefer walking."
You raised your eyebrow a little, amused; what does it mean his relationship with cars is complicated? You couldn't help but think, as you nodded your head with faked understanding. It was hard to believe that his ass in military didn't have a driving license, so it only meant that his ability to drive was...
Different, maybe. And for his own safety, as well as yours and anyone on the road, he picked out walking instead of driving. Smart, though.
"That's why you've walked me home."
"Affirmative."
"Walked you home?" Kyle looked at both of you in shock, laughing to himself. "Oh, fuck, man. So many things are happening on leave, ain't it?"
"Gaz." Price shot him a look.
"I can't even-"
"Gaz."
"Fuck, okay" he rolled his eyes, shaking his head to himself. "Just so you know, if Johnny wouldn't be so caught up in Ros, he'd back me up."
Your gaze automatically went to Rosalie, who talked with her bartender friend. Johnny, right next to you, was looking at her with slightly darker eyes, leaning his head against palm of his hand. It was... a view, honestly; friends, but not admitting to something more, even if everyone else saw their bond is beyond simple "best friends".
Something that you considered as cute.
You couldn't help but wish that they will be together soon enough; the way they cared for each other... Hell, probably everyone wanted something like this for themselves, as well as you; something so pure with longing glances that would make you weak in your knees.
A sigh of annoyance came out of you – where the hell you were supposed to find something like this when you spent most of the days in the clinic? Tinder or any portal like this wasn't even an option.
Mostly because you met your crazy ass ex here, but also you wanted to... hell, get past that online dating stage.
Was it too much to ask?
"Another round?" Kyle's voice brought you back to earth; you nodded immediately, standing up from your seat. "Captain, Ghost, you comin'?"
"Mm, no. 'm gonna make a call." Price shook his head. "You go. Another one will be on me."
You looked at Simon.
"I'll pass too." he murmured, coughing. "
"Oh, come on! You have to do one shot with me. Please."
"Addison-"
"Please?" you pleaded, extending an arm to him, so he could grab his hand. "Just one."
Simon sighed. "You're not gonna let it go, eh?"
"No, not really. I owe you for that mechanic, don't I?" you tilted your head, smiling a bit. "Come on. Please. Just one shot. Or one drink, anything, really."
He didn't say anything; just followed you to the bar with boys, while you babbled about your work, when Gaz asked what does exactly vet do, besides controls and all.
And it felt really good to feel Simon's eyes on you the whole time. How he keeps his rich, brown eyes at you, while you tried desperately to keep yourself together, just in case - because after alcohol, you were the touchy-feely version of yourself.
He had some time to learn it.
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soundspeachytome ¡ 1 year ago
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dusty and fraulein (shohei ohtani au)
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summary: your asshole cat falls in love with your new next-door neighbor and takes shelter in his front porch while displacing his poor dog, dusty, and a whole lot of chaos in between ensues.
tropes: enemies to lovers, next door neighbor dynamics, dog parent x cat parent, fake dating, small town romance, pure, pure fluff and romance only.
word count: 11.2k
this is far from my original writing style but i hope you have fun reading as much as i had writing this! (if there are any inconsistencies, sorry in advance!)
other notes: i had patterned the two characters loosely after lorelai and luke and stars hollow as the town. *swoon!*
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously.
=================================
“You’ve got to be kidding me.”
You squint through the harsh back light of your phone and see the time: 8:47 AM. It is barely brunch and you hear loud music and conversation from outside your bedroom window. You pull the covers over your head and try to go back to sleep but the sound of a hammer being pounded on wood disrupts your journey back to dreamland. 
It also doesn’t help that your head also feels like someone is drilling it into concrete. For a split second, you wonder why you even let that much alcohol enter your system on a Friday night, and why no one stopped you when you were such a lightweight. You try to remember the events from the night before and then it hits you: you caught your boyfriend–now ex!--sexting with an intern at his office through the messages on his phone. You were not the type to scour through your boyfriends’ phones but it was supposed to be dinner date night with pasta and Sauvignon Blanc when Jack’s phone lit up from the kitchen counter. You were busy preparing cutlery when the phone dinged again. You thought it was important from work and since you had been very open and comfortable with each after a year of dating, taking a peek would not hurt. 
Nothing could have prepared you for what you saw. 
Jack, despite being a successful finance analyst, the smart, bookish type, the one who can compute numbers in his head in about 5 seconds or less, apparently was not smart enough to keep his notifications hidden or at least try and cover them up like a serial cheater would. Not that you  wanted him hiding anything from you, but at that moment, seeing the thirst traps and the disgusting follow-up sexts from his notifications bar were enough for you to hurl his precious PS5 from the fifth floor of his apartment building and leave the crime scene with the wine and pasta in tow. 
You don’t know what happened after because you left while he was still in the shower, his apartment thrashed, with a note which you left that says, “For the record, I faked all my orgasms during our sexy time. Veronica ❤️ seems to love your *mini* performance though! PS. If you’re looking for your PS5, try looking down from the balcony, asshole.”
Love is a lie, you scoffed. You let the remnants of last night’s hurt consume you for a little bit more and cry under the covers. You cried until your eyes tired, until the weight of your head felt heavier than a bowling ball. You thought about staying in bed for a few more minutes when a boisterous laughter interrupted your thoughts. The laugh was followed by incomprehensible sentences. The voice came from a man probably in his late twenties, deep, jovial and friendly. You couldn’t make out the words from this distance but he sounded like he was giving instructions, volume fading in and out every now and then. Then more manly laughter. You didn’t know why but this person had a distinct laugh that you found very pleasant. You wonder somberly if you could laugh like that again. 
You jolted upright and went for the door. You will definitely be happy again soon but first, coffee. 
The best hangover fix is a steaming cup of coffee with a plate of bacon and pancakes. You poured yourself a hot mug of coffee and suddenly felt unstoppable, like you’re actually happy, at least temporarily. The pounding in your head has subsided but the drilling from nextdoor hasn’t. You must have new neighbors, the way you’re seeing movers coming in and out of the moving truck parked outside. You tried to catch a glimpse of this neighbor causing all the ruckus but were unsuccessful as the trees lined beside your porch were covering your line of vision. From behind you, you felt your cat, Fraulein, bump her head on your ankles, purring audibly.
“Looks like the new neighbors woke you up too, huh?” She yawned and continued looking up at you. 
Fraulein, a female American shorthair of three years, stood around nine pounds with her stocky legs and long, proportioned tail. Her fur was a thick orange coat with faint white stripes covering most of her body. She was nameless when you picked her up from the animal shelter. She was barely five months old at that time and despite being smaller than the other cats, she had snuggled up to you when you reached for a pet. When you scratched her head and heard her purr loudly, you knew right then and there that she was the one for you. She was the friendliest, clingiest and most loveable thing you have in your life, and despite her “orange cat personality” as most people had dubbed, you wouldn’t replace her with anything in the world, not even for your hound dog-looking ex, Jack. 
She did a big stretch as you picked her up while you stood idly by the window. As you stared outside, Fraulein’s purring sending you in a trance, you suddenly notice a pair of eyes looking up at you from the front lawn. Those eyes should not be there, and more importantly, the pair of eyes belonged to a dog standing just mere inches from your flowering shrubs, tail wagging. If this dog takes another step, they could ruin the gardenias you’ve been trying to grow. 
You step outside and try to shoo the dog away when it suddenly jumps and barks. 
“Hey! Get away from my garden!” You try to stay calm as the dog continues to bark and come playfully near the shrubs. Your heart sinks when his paw accidentally steps on the stems of your peonies. You’ve been meaning to pluck them this week so you can replace the wilted ones from your vase. 
“Oh my god… Please go away! Shoo!” You desperately waved the dog away but it continued to jump excitedly and roll around, probably thinking you were out there to play. Fraulein, who was still in your arms the entire time, started getting restless and was hissing at the dog’s direction, her untucked claws boring into your skin. That’s when you saw a man, probably over six feet tall, rushing towards the dog. He had thick black hair and the widest shoulders you’ve ever seen. 
“Oh my god, Dusty! What are you doing here…” He put a leash on the dog, whose name was probably Dusty, as you have heard, and carried him with one arm. 
“I’m so so sorry! I was inside the house and I didn’t realize Dusty escaped from his leash.” His big brown eyes complemented well against his slightly tanned skin. With your obvious height difference, you had to look up at him from a distance without hurting your neck. 
“He almost ruined my flowers,” You started to say, eyes still locked in his. If you hadn’t forced yourself to look towards your garden, you would have been sucked into his creamy brown orbs. 
You assessed the garden from the mini scuffle. There was a bit of overturned soil from some of the shrubs, especially from the peonies getting the most damage. The stems have been slightly bent, almost breaking from where it stood. 
“Oh my gosh, I’m sosososorry! I didn’t mean to–I mean, Dusty’s still young, he’s very playful and…” 
“I was planning on cutting them this week, anyway. Your dog has to stay away from my garden, though.” I pointed at the lopsided peonies, almost looking like they have their hands up in the air, waving sideways.
He looked so apologetic that he almost looked like it was his fault. He tightened his grip on his dog, Dusty, who looked so small and well-behaved being cradled by a big-bodied man. Meanwhile, Fraulein has not relaxed one bit after that quick garden mess and had her claws out, clinging to my threadbare sweater.
“Yes ma’am, I’ll keep a tight leash on her. I’m Shohei Ohtani, by the way. We just moved next door, so I guess we’re neighbors now. I’d offer my hand right now, but I’m afraid Dusty would jump out of my grip. ”
Now that you are able to look at his face carefully, you realize that he was fairly handsome. Correctly proportioned face, dreamy brown eyes, and a smile that invited first love butterflies kind of vibe. He was also tall and definitely bulky over that black long-sleeved sweater that was folded up to his elbows. You could tell he dedicates a good amount of time to his body.
“So that explains all this noise so early in the morning.” You say with an almost sarcastic tone of voice. You didn’t mean it and you were willing to forgive them for the morning ruckus but the garden mishap and the mini-heart attack you had for your plants had somehow added to the list of how-to-piss-your-neighbor-on-the-first-day. And you’re really bad at moving past your first impressions of other people. 
“Are all cat people always this cranky in the morning?” He commented cheekily, displaying a playful expression in his eyes. This man named Shohei is trying to get to you and it’s definitely working. For a first conversation, it surely is getting on your nerves to be read so openly, and in your own premises, at that. 
“Excuse me?”
“It’s just an observation. Cat people seemed to be more emotionally charged than dog people.” He said matter-of-factly and continued to smile. He’s handsome but he’s also starting to be annoying as hell. What does he mean by that? Does he want to show off that dog people are better than cat people? 
“Well. If we’re going to talk about stereotypes here then I must say dog people are careless people-pleasers who hogs the attention and only cares about being liked and do not give a rat’s ass on taking up other people’s space and boundaries. I’d also offer to shake my hand but I’m afraid my cat right here might scratch your dog’s face for ruining our morning.” You stared hard at him and slowly backed away, returning to your porch steps.
“Nice to meet you, too, I guess! I would suggest chamomile tea and tone down on coffee!” He waved cheerfully, as he exited the lawn and walked towards his home. You turned your heel and slammed the door shut loud enough for him to hear. Fraulein jumped out of your grip and mewed almost as angrily. She darted toward the kitchen and went out of sight. 
“What a weirdo… If Fraulein doesn’t like him then I don’t have to like him, too.” You muttered to yourself and moved to the bathroom to take a shower. 
You spent your afternoon in the garden, watering and cutting the flowers in full bloom. You wore your oldest t-shirts with a print that says “I Wet My Plants” under your pink square overalls and a sun hat to protect you from the sun. You were listening to your beloved Birdy mix on your headphones as you tended the prettiest flowers in your garden, muting the noise of the world.
I know I was stupid to let what we had go to waste
Why does everything I love always get taken away?
Ghost in the wind calling you to take me home
Ghost in the wind crying, where do I belong?
Can anyone hear me now?
Can anyone hear me now?
“Can you hear me, Y/N?”
“Agh!”
You almost jumped out of your skin when a hand touched you lightly in the arm. It was Patrick Sandoval, your high school best friend, and sometimes main supplier of Fraulein’s flea medicine. You forgot that he was visiting today.
“Whoa! Extra jumpy today?” he smiled his Colgate-white smile and cocked his head to the side. “Coffee overload, again?”
Suddenly you remembered what your new neighbor had said during your first encounter this morning. Naturally cranky… Tone down on the coffee… He had no idea to be assuming things like that, not when you had just literally met.
“Jack cheated on me and I was hungover, okay?” You grit your teeth through the mention of your ex. Like the stench of his name made the bile climb up your throat. “I decimated his PS5 into tiny cracked pieces.”
“Oh, shit, man.. I’m proud of you.” He put you in a half-embrace and patted your head. “Do you need me to break his legs for you?”
You giggled, arm still locked around his waist. “No, but I took one of his expensive wines so that evens that out for me, I think. I don’t care.”
Patrick looks at you and wonders if he arrived too late today. He notices the dark bags under your eyes and your puffy face, probably a result of crying all night. He wondered if you had been crying all morning, too. He couldn’t help but lean in and give you a full, bear hug.
“Just let me know if you need us to file a restraining order, babygirl.” You snorted and buried your face under his embrace, thankful for the assurance. Patrick has always been your rock since high school. When your first boyfriend ditched you in prom, Patrick was there to rescue you when he wasn’t initially supposed to go; you ended the night with stomachs full of pizza, sparkling soda and belly laughter.
You and Patrick had been for each other’s rarest moments throughout adulthood: gushing about your first times, your first heartbreaks, getting into college, graduation… you even wondered if both of you are just teetering from the sidelines, waiting for each other to do the first move. You always brush the thought away because to do that means risking your friendship with him. You don’t want to lose him, not even as a friend.
“By the way, I’m just here to drop these medicines for dear ol’ Frau that you asked.” He lifted a paper bag with a cute animal picture and his pet shop name printed across it. Paw and Order.
 “Thanks, Patrick. I could’ve picked them up if you called.” Patrick has been the sole pet doctor in town which contributed solely to his success. Seeing how much people nowadays prefer taking pets instead of bearing children, he took the opportunity to put up his own pet shop and clinic; you and Fraulein have been number one customers ever since.
“It’s my pleasure, milady.” He did an elegant bow, to which I returned a curtsy, and giggled. “I’m also here to let you know that I’ll be on a business trip for two weeks. So this will be sort of my goodbye.”
“What kind of business trip takes two weeks long?” You don’t really want him to leave, especially with the holidays approaching, you had planned to spend it all with him.
“The kind where your father wants you to venture to a new business spot and spend the holidays with him and his new family.” He shrugged and looked at you, hoping you’d stop him from the impending family mess he’s about to go to, but you only scrunched your nose.
“That sucks, man. You’ll miss all the fruitcakes.” 
“I know, dude.” He pouted. “How are Frau's fleas, by the way? Did the medicine work last time?” 
“Sure did, she’s better now. Speaking of which, where is that old hag?” You haven’t seen her since early morning’s commotion. The last time you saw her she was napping by the window of your bedroom.
“Just call me if you notice anything weird. The medicines should be enough while I’m gone.” 
“Leaving already?”
“First thing in the morning, bub.” He said. “I’ll miss you.”
“Frau and I will miss you, too!” And the two of you embraced in another warm hug. When you both pulled back, he helped you pick up the basket of freshly bloomed flowers you had collected for the day and went back inside the house. You had given him the extra jar of lemon iced tea you’ve been saving for a particularly warm day like this. 
~~~
It’s been a whole day that you haven’t seen Fraulein. She usually wanders off hours in a day but she always returns by dinner time. You were starting to worry as the sky slowly turned pitch black. The lampposts turn on, illuminating the streets. You turn the porch lights on, too, and leave her bowl of food and water by the doorstep, in case she decides to come home late into the night. 
~~~~
You wake up to a high-pitched yowling outside. You’re not exactly sure where but you know that sound from anywhere. You bolted down the stairs with your sleeping robe undone and ran towards the lawn. You can’t see anything until you hear it again.
“Nyreooow!”
Soon, a dog howls and you run towards Shohei Ohtani’s house.
You see Fraulein perched on top of Shohei’s porch, her entire back arched defensively, ears twitching backwards. She was hissing at Dusty, who was whimpering loudly below the porch steps and looking terrified. In your panic, you run to the lawn to pick Fraulein up.
“Fraulein! What are you doing here?” 
Dusty continued to bark loudly, trying to come near the door where Fraulein stood. She hissed menacingly at him.
At that exact moment, Shohei Ohtani emerged from the front door, yawning and trying to get sleep out of his eyes. 
“Whazhapeninhere?” He yawned, looking clearly disoriented from suddenly waking up.
“Your dog is trying to attack my cat!” I yelled, trying to go near Fraulein but stepped back as Dusty blocked your way. 
Shohei popped awake as soon as he heard Fraulein hiss at Dusty once more; Fraulein arched her back more and raised her claws in defense.
“Whoa, hey!” Shohei ran up to Dusty and cradled him in his arms like a baby. Poor dog was shaking and whimpering.
“Are you sure it’s not your cat trying to attack my baby?” He raised his voice. He was standing a few feet away from you and looked you up and down, noticing your loose sleeping robe and looking away. 
“Poor baby getting scared by a cat,” He cooed silently, helping Dusty relax.
You walked up the porch when Fraulein hissed and scratched your arms when you picked her up. She wriggled from your grasp but conceded defeat when you scruffed her by the neck, immobilizing her. 
“I don’t know what’s happening here, but please stay away from my cat.” You looked at both Shohei and Dusty sternly. He noticed the scratches on your hands.
“You’re bleeding.” He started.
You looked down on your hands and saw visible red scratch marks. They started from the middle of your arm all the way to the back of your hand.
“I’m fine.” You huffed, trying to walk away as fast as possible. You don’t know what time it was, but it could easily be past midnight. 
“No, wait. Please, I have antiseptic soap inside…” He rushed towards the house, when he looked back and saw you frozen on the steps, he beckoned you and disappeared inside. “Come on.”
You stood there for a moment and contemplated if you should follow Shohei inside. You barely know the guy and every encounter you’ve had with him always ended in a screaming match or a passive-aggressive exchange. He might even be an ax murderer for all you know. A very handsome one, at that. 
“Frau, if something happens to me, please know that I love you.” You held her near your face. “Third drawer by the sink is where I kept all your catnip”. You whispered to her ear and walked towards Shohei Ohtani’s home.
~~~
Shohei Ohtani’s home was, first of all, very clean. It did not reek of anything a dog owner normally would smell like. It had the occasional puppy toys around the living room, but much to your surprise, it was spotless. It also smelled like sweet rose and laundry detergent. You also discovered that just like you, he lives alone. 
Shohei had put Dusty inside a retractable gate to keep him safe from Fraulein as you put her down on the floor. He busied himself looking for his first aid kit. You don’t notice any other pictures on display except him and Dusty and one with his complete family on the refrigerator door. 
His tall frame reappears and he pulls you towards the kitchen sink. You soak your arms under the water and he hands you the antiseptic soap.
“Thanks,” You mumbled. He never left your side and waited until you finished rinsing off, then took your arm and put cream on the scratch marks. He was standing unbelievably close, you could almost see his long eyelashes as he had his head down, concentrating on his self-appointed task. 
He also had his other hand holding you tight, as if to make sure you won’t run off suddenly. 
“I have these at home, you know.” You trained your eyes on his fingers dabbing cream. Don’t look at his arm veins, Y/N. Don’t look at them. Don’t look. Don’t.
“Oh, gee. Why didn’t I think of that?” He mused to which you rolled your eyes. Once again, the magic had worn off. 
“Do you really have to sound sarcastic all the time?”
“C’mon, lighten up.  Besides, it happened on my property so I feel partially responsible–even if it was your cat’s fault.” He shrugged.
You coughed at his accusation. “Fraulein does not instigate fights. She is well-mannered and prim all the time, thank you very much.” You pulled your cream-covered arm away from him. Just then, you notice Fraulein bumping her head on Shohei’s legs, mewling softly.
“How would you then explain the fact where your cat steals Dusty’s bed from the front porch?” He said, crossing his arm, Fraulein on the other hand, was still headbutting Shohei on the legs.
“Oh, she did not.” You retorted. Why would she steal someone’s fray-looking bed when she has her beautiful beige 2-condo tree tower with a capsule nest and dangling balls and a charming basket-weave style oval bed at home? It didn’t make sense. “She only sleeps in the beds I bought her.”
Shohei gives you a funny look and fishes his phone from his pocket. “Well, you’re in for quite a shock, I guess.”
He shoves the phone to you after tinkering with it for a while. “That’s your cat at 30:56 right?”
You look closely, a bit disoriented at what he was trying to show you. CCTV recorded footage of his porch outside where his dog, Dusty, was sitting in his dog bed, playing with his puppy chew ball, when suddenly, you saw Fraulein enter the frame from the left. 
“It doesn’t show anything.” You impatiently looked on, disbelief and denial dripping from you. 
“Oh just you wait.” 
Fraulein was moving slowly, watching Dusty and his toy. A few minutes pass by, the video captures Shohei exiting the front door and Dusty follows him playfully, at which, the dog bed was obviously vacated, and Fraulein took the opportunity to lay on it. 
Shohei cops the phone away and crosses his arms across his chest. “The court finds the defendant guilty.”
It took you a moment but gasped dramatically at the realization. “Was she here the entire day yesterday? Napping on your dog’s bed?” You looked at Fraulein with sheer disapproval. “Fraulein von Hammersmark, that is not how female felines behave.”
Shohei stifled a laugh. He was leaning over his stomach and ears red. “Relax. I don’t mind at all. I think Dusty does, though.” He picks up Fraulein calmly and gives her  scratches on her head. Fraulein purrs loudly. 
“She has been napping here all day since morning and seems to enjoy watching her new neighbor work out in the front lawn.” 
You grimaced, making sure you showed him your disgust. “Ew, weird flex but okay.”
Dusty whimpers as he looks at the scene from outside his gate. You walk over and give him a light pat on the head. “Dusty, blink once if you need help.” 
“Oh, please.” He giggles. “I’m not the weird one for naming my cat Fraulein von Hammersomething.” Shohei returns Fraulein to you, your arms touching, his head closer to yours momentarily. 
“Y/N. I wonder what the weather is on your side. You want to wear something warmer than that?” He pointed at your loose sleeping gown, your legs showing a little bit of your thigh. A little more movement and the knots would dangerously slip out of your waist and reveal your lingerie. 
“Pervert.” You instinctively covered your chest and ran back home, arms carrying Fraulein and the weight of shame for being almost half-naked inside a strange man’s house. 
~~~~
The next few days after that incident were spent with writing articles for an obscure lifestyle website and your part-time work at the bookstore in town, Novel Nook. You ride a 30 minute bus ride to the town square everyday for work and wait 15 minutes in line to grab a cup of coffee from the coffee shop beside it. It doesn’t feel like work at all because you are always surrounded by the books that you love. It took you a long time to realize that working 9-5 in an office cubicle with ugly fluorescent lighting was deteriorating your mental headspace and when your mom passed, you jumped the gun and submitted your intent to resign.
You removed all the baggage you kept from the city and only brought the ones that mattered to you: your cat, your big books, some pretty clothes you never wore in the city but are wearing freely and confidently now, and your memories of your mom. You flew seven thousand miles back home to the place you were meant to be all this time, and you couldn’t be happier and more content. 
You were walking sluggishly back home from a tiring day at work at Novel Nook where two teenagers fought for the last copy of The Hurricane Wars and it took all your energy to de-escalate before they could start pulling each other’s hair. You can’t wait to kick your boots back, hug Fraulein and maybe continue reading a book. 
Your house is on the opposite side of the bus stop so you always (almost begrudgingly) have to pass by Shohei’s house every time. Sometimes it would be quiet with Dusty playing alone on the porch, or Shohei having a barbecue and would always cheerfully waving at you while you just give him a brief nod. Recently, you’ve grown accustomed to seeing Fraulein hanging out in his place more often than you have imagined. She’s like a teenage girl rebelling against her overbearing mother, hanging out with the wrong crowd. After that incident with Dusty, she has claimed dominance on his bed, Shohei had no choice but to buy a new one for his poor dog, while Fraulein smugly walks around in her new territory. 
You had developed some sort of weird neighbor-dynamic with Shohei after that. On days Fraulein had to take her medicine shots that Patrick had given you, you’d walk towards his house and pick her up like some sort of pet daycare. Shohei likes to call it “daddy daycare” as if you’re two divorced parents and he is the cool dad that all the kids love hanging with while you’re the uptight, overbearing mother with full custody and all, that the kids hate. 
“Fraulein, your mom’s here.” Shohei said one day, looking up from his laptop which was perched on the table he had set up on his porch, sitting adjacent to Fraulein. Dusty was chewing on his toy, as usual, and perked up a welcome upon seeing you. 
Fraulein stands and stretches her back and sits back again resting on Shohei’s foot, to which Shohei smirks almost smugly. “She loves her dad more, it seems.”
You roll your eyes and pick up Fraulein. “Stop calling yourself her dad before I burn your house down.”
“Ooh, an arsonist for a neighbor. That’s so sexy, Y/N.” He looked you up and down and wiggled his eyebrows. “You’re too cute to go to jail, though. How about going out with me instead?”
“Piss off. C’mon, Fraulein, time for medicine.” You turned and walked back to your home, trying to keep a straight face at the being called cute with Shohei. You’re too cute. You made the mistake of looking back as you turned to your corner and saw Shohei grinning at you.
This day would be no different as you passed by Shohei’s house today and saw Fraulein napping at the exact same place on his porch. He was working out doing ab crunches on the ground. You decided today, you wouldn’t dare to go on another episode of sarcasm battle with Shohei and go straight home. He was wearing workout clothes of course, with his gym shorts and sleeveless shirt, for all the temptations in the world, this one, you had proudly resisted and warded off like the devil. 
You found Dusty on your lawn, sitting by the patch of grass far from your flowers, thankfully, and staring far ahead into the direction of your home. You patted him and tried to get his attention. Ever since being displaced by Fraulein, he had been giving you frequent visits and play in your yard and you’d give him treats from your secret stash.
“Hey, bud. Were you waiting for me?” He ignored you and continued to look on.
By the door, you can see a tall black figure standing, unmoving. It was a man in a black suit with hands in his pockets. When he turns around, you see a familiar face.  
“No,” You whispered. Jack smiles at you and waves, as if nothing had happened almost a month ago. As if he was just returning from a business trip. Like cheating on you was nothing.
You started panicking and heaving heavily. Dusty senses your fear and barks at Jack when he slowly walks over to you. 
Dusty continued to growl and bark at Jack while you tried to move backward, feet heavy like lead. 
“Stop, don’t come near me, Jack.” you struggled.
“Y/N, I’m here to apologize, for whatever happened, for whatever it made you feel.” He was still slowly walking towards you, eyeing Dusty carefully.
“We have nothing to talk about anymore, Jack. It’s over, in case you forgot.”
“I said come here, you bitch.” He growled. 
At this point, you only realized you were shaking terribly when a hand wrapped on your shoulder, calming you down.
“Are you okay?” It was Shohei’s voice and you have never felt so relieved to hear his voice. You weakly put your arm around his waist and leaned on him. You were still shaking badly, from the exhaustion, or the fear, you couldn’t tell. 
“Is everything okay?” Shohei acknowledges Jack who stopped at around five feet from where you were. 
“We were just discussing something… private.” Jack shifts his eyes between you and Shohei, who was sizing him up and down. Between Shohei, who stood over six feet tall, bulky, and ripped, and Jack, just around five foot nine, body somewhat lean and lanky, Jack didn’t stand a chance. 
Realizing this, you found more comfort and confidence in your plan. You looked up to see Shohei still trying to converse with Jack while keeping a firm arm around you. 
“Shohei.” He looked at you cautiously and tightened his grip on your shoulder. 
Please promise me that you won’t get mad at what I’m about to do.
“What is it, Y/N? Who is this guy?” he said.
“He’s my ex who I want nothing to do with.” He straightened his back but you pulled him by the neck so you could whisper in his ear.
“I’m so sorry, Shohei.” 
“I’m not sure I understand–” He tilted his head in confusion. Jack starts moving forward again, looking almost pissed by just looking at you and Shohei. 
With Shohei still leaning forward, you desperately grabbed his cheeks and pecked him square on the lips. 
Shock induces both Shohei’s and Jack’s faces when you pull back, eyes focused on Jack and hoping to God he’d get the message. Wild red alarms blared and rang loudly in your head, you just kissed Shohei, your hot and annoying neighbor! You just kissed him! You ignored this and focused on the problem at hand. 
“He’s my boyfriend, Jack. Please leave now–” 
Shohei recovers from his shock and kisses you back in bigger, wider and longer strokes of his tongue. The tremors in your body shook harder and you felt your limbs melt into a puddle of water. Shohei’s big warm hands were there to catch you as your knees unbuckled. 
You kissed back and forgot everything that was happening in the background. Dusty barking, Jack’s shell-shocked face, the vehicles passing by the street witnessing your spectacle. You ignored all of this and focused on the way Shohei holds on to your body from your neck, to your back until it rests to the back of your waist, gripping tight, his firm and taut body pressing hard onto you, and his lips sliding over yours so smoothly, stimulating all the senses in your tongue and mouth. 
You don’t know how many seconds passed when you stayed inside that bubble but when you both pulled back for air, Jack was no longer there and Dusty had stopped barking. Instead, he just sat quietly on the ground, waiting for you to finish. 
You stared at Shohei and you stared back at him. Your hand was still on his neck, half-gripping the nape. You slowly let go and pull away. It’s always after the sin that you feel the shame and guilt. 
He doesn’t let go and instead takes you by the shoulder. “Come inside first and we’ll talk.”
You nod wordlessly and follow his lead. You couldn’t walk properly anyway, so you didn’t want to fight back. Your knees felt like jelly and your brain full of fog. That was hot, you thought, but also very wrong.
You sat at Shohei’s dining table chugging a glass of water. By the time you finished, he sat there in front of you and continued looking at you intensely.
In your post-kiss and post-Jack clarity, you’re now too embarrassed to admit the way you handled that situation. But Shohei, being Shohei, seemed unfazed. For the most part, he found it amusing to be part of your ex-boyfriend escape plan, of all the people. 
“A man never listens to a no,” You were too focused on the rim of the glass. You want to look anywhere but Shohei’s mouth. “And I was desperate for him to get away… so I did.. That.”
“Y/N, you were trembling out there. What exactly has he done to you?” He removed the glass from your grip and made you focus on him.
“He… I… He’s an asshole when he gets angry. And I was just scared I wouldn't be able to refuse him. I don’t want him anymore.”
“For someone as arrogant and snappish as you, that’s pretty hard to believe.” You rolled your eyes at him and smirked, lips looking luscious and fuller than the last time. 
“Look, I was probably having a panic attack back there, and I’m okay now, see?” You spread your arms widely, faking a smile at him. You’d like this conversation to end so you could run back to your house and ram your head to the wall. The more you stay in Shohei’s presence, the more embarrassed you feel about wanting and enjoying that kiss. You did. You do. And you want more. 
“I wanted an easy way out, you happened to be there and I grabbed the moment.” You rambled on. “And that kiss, it was just a one-time thing.”
“A one-time thing?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Yes, it was a mistake. We don’t even like each other to kiss, so we can forget about it.”
“Is that right?” His lips curled into a smirk.
“Yes, tomorrow, we act like it never happened, okay?” You stood up and started collecting yourself. You hang by the door and look back, Shohei had his arms crossed against his chest, staring at you. 
“I don’t know, Y/N. That seems pretty unforgettable to me.”
~~~~~
The following morning, you woke up early to visit the farmer's market to replenish your cupboard. You wore black tights over your long beige dress and a gray cardigan. You put your hair down in loose waves today and replaced your contacts with your old prescription eyeglasses. 
Sprawled in front of you were tents and tables of farmers and sellers of freshly harvested fruits and vegetables to your heart’s content. Almost everyone you knew from town was there on a bright day like this. You said your hellos and some, who were avid customers of Novel Nook, asked about the new book releases. Since it is a fairly small town, it is inevitable to spot the ones that you direly wanted to avoid. For example, your ex-boyfriend Jack. 
He was standing one tent away and seemed to just idly window-shopping. You put your head down and try not to meet his gaze or look at his direction as you busy yourself looking through a good bunch of tomatoes. 
“Hey, Y/N.” You put your guard down and suddenly he is in front of you. 
“What are you doing here?” 
“Trying to… buy some tomatoes?” He sneered, holding a tomato in his hand. “I don’t see your boyfriend around.”
“I…He’s… Can you please stop following me?” Cold sweat ran through your spine as he noticed you fumble, noticing your lie. 
“Lest you forget, I live here, too.” 
“Not in this side of town, you don’t.” You walked away with the bag of tomatoes you purchased. You moved quickly and avoided the throng of people that was starting to build up. 
“I just want us to talk… Y/N. You didn’t give me a chance to explain yesterday.” He continued to follow you, hands behind his back. He was obviously not there to buy tomatoes. 
“I don’t want to see you anymore. Leave me alone or I’ll call the police.” You looked at him sternly, hand gripping tightly on the basket you were holding. One false move and you just might smash his head with a whole pineapple. 
“No boyfriend to come save you now?” Jack chuckled. 
“There you are.” A familiar voice sprung up from behind, and a hand snaked around your waist. Shohei was suddenly beside you, holding on to his own basket of shopping bags.  “I was looking all over for you. Look, I got you blueberries for the cake you were planning to bake. ”
Shohei pinched your sides and smiled, nodding at you to play along with his little act. You forced a wide smile and said, “Wow, yes. You remembered, love? Thank you.”
You both turned to Jack who had a repulsed expression on his face. He coughed up and tried to get back his composure, but it was too late as both of you were already walking away. Shohei did not let go of you even until you turned a corner. You couldn’t care less about shopping anymore as you worried about running into Jack again.
“It looks like your ex is adamant on following you around.” He whispered to your ear, looking back and seeing Jack following far behind. “Care to give him a show, love?” 
You widen your eyes as you realized what was about to happen. 
He moves his head closer to yours and locks you in a wet kiss. He pushed deeper into the kiss when you unconsciously opened your mouth and let him in, mouth and tongue. The smell of clean detergent mixed with a little bit of vanilla filled your lungs, slapping you drunk. The second kiss was just as good as the first. 
Shohei suddenly pulls back from the kiss and offers his hand, and continues walking along like he hadn’t sucked the air out of your body.
For a few more tents, you and Shohei walked around hand in hand in the cold morning, picking fruits and vegetables like your typical neighborhood couple. Many onlookers saw the two of you eating from the free taste section, or arguing about the right vegetable size to buy, or just happily chatting with his hand not letting you go. 
“Shohei, I think Jack’s no longer around.” You motion for him to let go of your hand. 
“Aw, I thought we weren’t acting anymore, the way you were kissing me back there.” He smirks and lets go of your hand, missing his warmth already. 
“I’m only letting your hand go because you look like you’re going to topple over with how heavy this basket is.” He took your groceries from you and led the way. Since you’re practically almost living together, you have no choice but to walk with him awkwardly. 
“Thank you, Shohei.” You said quietly, walking feebly behind him.
“Didn’t catch that, love. What–” He wheels around and stops himself after realizing what he said, the tips of his ears turning red. You tried to keep a straight face but failed as both of you got caught in the moment. 
“Don’t get used to it.” You giggled and skipped your steps, leaving him to carry all the shopping bags he refused to let you carry. 
~~~
You were slowly settling down for the night with a movie on and a bowl of buttered popcorn when you heard a faint knock on the door.
Shohei was standing outside with his hands in the pockets of his checkered pajama pants. On his feet seems to be a brand new pet backpack carrier.
“Special delivery for one order of queen of meowtown, clingy and fuzzball Fraulein!” He beamed and pointed at the carrier. Fraulein was sitting relaxedly inside. 
“Don’t be shocked or anything but I accidentally bought two of these.” He pointed at the carrier. “I-I thought you’d like to have one for Fraulein. You don’t have to accept it i-if you…”
You smiled as he stammered on. “This looks really cute, I love it.”
Shohei smiled widely and helped push the carrier to your living room. “Then I'll give this as a gift!”
“It would be improper to receive a gift like this...”
“I refuse to accept no, Y/N. Take it please.”
You wanted to mull over it, let it marinate in your head and see what happens but ever since the first two kisses you shared with him, Shohei has been… extra friendly recently. And you were not that kind of “friend”. Whenever you pass his house, he’d go out of his way and talk to you before you walk away. Asking you questions if you’re on the way to the farmer's market, or if you’re on your way to work, if you want to join him for a run. He’s been attentive and you’re not sure what exactly this dynamic has evolved into. You feel uncomfortable about the attention you’re receiving but at the same time, you feel it in your chest and in your stomach and at the tips of your fingers. The fluttering. The tremors and the shakiness of breaths. It’s always there when he’s there. 
“Okay, fine. I’ll take it. But no more other gifts, okay!” You opened the carrier to let Fraulein out who walked idly away and climbed into her tree tower. 
Shohei smiled, nodding. He was about to leave the door when you pulled the sleeve of his shirt. 
“Wait. Um.”
He stepped back and looked inquiringly. You held up a photo from your phone to his face: it was you and Shohei on the day you went to the farmer’s market, holding hands while looking at freshly picked flowers. Shohei’s eyes squinted with laughter, looking intently at you while you were captured trying to explain something trivial. It was quite a beautiful shot sent to you by a cousin who was good at photography. More than that, if you were a stranger looking at a random photo like this, you’d think you were happily in love, and the thought made your chest flutter. 
“It’s quite a small town so it didn’t come as a shock to me when people started noticing whatever this was.” Shohei was still looking at the photo, a small smile drawn on his lips. 
“My mom’s side of the family is setting up a brunch this weekend. I usually bring Patrick to this but they wanted to meet you so…” You trailed.
You coughed and took the phone away. “It’s just a small group of people. And we can always say we broke up after three months or something.”
He cocked his head, looking confused. “Are we still doing the pretending thing with your family?”
“Yeah, I mean. We don’t like each other like that, right? We can just say it didn’t work out after three or four months. They usually move on pretty quickly from the guys I date.”
“Let me get this straight, Y/N.” He said slowly, the Adam’s apple on his throat went up and down as he swallowed. “You want to introduce me to your family as your fake boyfriend on your family brunch.”
You affirmed. “Yes.”
“And we’re going to cook up a reason to break up.”
“Yes.”
“And you said we don’t really like each other that much.”
“Not one bit”
“When we already had two kisses.”
“Yeah.”
“And went on a date in the farmer’s market walking around while holding hands. We kissed twice.”
“It  wasn’t a date.”
“It was to me.” He muttered.
“It was because you were helping me with Jack, remember?”
Shohei sighed exasperatedly, his mood darkened. “Pssh, yeah, whatever. Text me the details. G’night.” He scooted to leave and just like that you were left all alone in a confused daze in your living room. 
~~~
You spent too much time tossing and turning on your bed that night. The voices in your head and the whispers in your heart having an ongoing debate about what had happened a few hours before. 
Shohei was extremely happy, almost beaming like a kid when he brought you his gift but his expression changed after you had the conversation about your family brunch. Maybe you can sit it out this year and make up an excuse that both you and Shohei couldn’t attend? Seasonal allergies? Car getting mauled? Someone’s pet dying? Gods, no. You internally smack yourself for even being near to the thought of either your pets dying, not when they’re the closest thing you have as your best friend and family. You believe Shohei believes that, too. 
And why would Shohei become upset when you proposed the idea of a fake relationship with your family? You started this whole mess and it’s slowly getting out of hand, you want to nip it in the bud so it won’t have to hurt that much later on. It was just a one-time thing, an escape plan until Jack gets out of your hair, then both of you can live as freely as you had before. 
Besides, Shohei doesn’t like you to be that upset. Does he? He’s just a neighbor who likes joking around and annoying you whenever he gets the chance. He also just so happens to be a neighbor that Fraulein spends a lot of time on, he’s just someone to you until recently. 
You touch your fingers on your lips. That kiss shouldn’t mean anything to you because maybe Shohei doesn’t think about it that much either. He’s probably had a good number of girls that he’s kissed with that mouth. Given how good those kisses were, his expertise was undeniably top notch. You’ve never had anything like that before. A kiss that makes your insides tremble with need, almost fairytale like. Something close to what Mia Thermopolis had fantasized before her royal engagement with Nick Devereaux, a kiss that makes your leg pop. That’s what it was. A leg-popping, heart-fluttering, soul-defining kind of a  kiss that you’ll ask for more.
But as much as you want this all for yourself like the next person, you just had your heart broken by Jack. Jack who had promised you the moon and the stars, and a beautiful, dreamy, family with your pets. He had you swooning and dreaming about forever. It was all perfect until that fateful date and the cheating. It hurts to realize that no matter how much you love and do better for a person, they will always look for ways to look at other people. The idea of getting into a relationship right away after what happened with Jack is preposterous at this point. The trust and self-confidence Jack broke is something you want to piece together yourself first. Even if it meant being alone for a couple of months, or years. Who knows.  
You tossed to your side once again, feeling the sleep finally get to you. You dozed off soaking under the thoughts of kittens and kissing a tall man with contagious laughter. 
~~~~
Shohei was filling Fraulein’s food and water bowl dutifully as you had asked, waiting for you to finish preparing for the family brunch in the living room. He had finally succumbed and agreed to go with you as your fake boyfriend, despite his initial feelings towards the arrangement. He still doesn’t understand what was going through your head but he nevertheless had stopped bringing it up. He realized that the more he asked, the more you pushed back and retreated into the dark. He decided that he’d wait for you to soften up. You always do. 
And that’s how the two of you went back to being friendly with each other. 
He was sitting on your living room couch with Fraulein, brushing her fur with his fingers. Just another territory she had claimed: Shohei’s lap. 
“Shohei, help please!” You ran down the stairs, all dolled up. You put your hair down again, this time, you kept it naturally soft and straight. You also donned a yellow sundress that hugged your body, showing off your natural curves. The hems of the skirt go loose from the thighs down. 
“Can you help me zip this up, please?” You said so casually. When you turned around and showed Shohei your bare, unzipped back, he swallowed hard. 
He held your waist lightly and zipped your back slowly, as if taking his time to gape at the bareness of your skin exposed for him. When his breath touched your neck, you felt goosebumps pop. 
“Let’s go.” You smiled too widely for him, trying to act like the oxygen in your house has not depleted. 
Shohei was a hit with your cousins during brunch. Turns out that all of them share the same interests in baseball and baseball teams. They were passionately chatting on one side of the garden area while you helped your Aunt Olivia set up the table.
“He’s quite the personality, Y/N.” She mused.
“Wherever did you find a man like that, Y/N?” Your cousin Evelyn commented, staring back. “Woot, what a view.”
You smiled and looked at Shohei socializing with your family. The moment the two of you entered Aunt Olivia’s home, everyone stared in awe. After introductions were made, Shohei made connections pretty quickly with his bubbly personality. You can also hear his occasional booming laughter from their group.
You were on your way to the kitchen when a hand on your waist suddenly pulled you from behind. Shohei led you to the empty pantry and pushed you back to the wall, his hands up on the wall and caging you.
“Hi?” 
“Hi.” He looked deep into your eyes, like he was looking for something. “Anyplace in this house, we are pretending, yes?”
“Yes, the moment we stepped out of the car. We are boyfriend and girlfriend.” You confirmed.
“Even here?” His lips shadowed lightly on yours, nose grazing yours. 
“Uhm. Yes.” You breathed and that would be your last breath for a while as Shohei kissed you full on the mouth. 
He kissed you frantically, with need and fervor. You put your hands over his shoulders and his hands reached the back of your leg, putting it over his waist. You stifled a moan as he bit your neck and peppered your chest with small kisses. You can’t help but push your hips forward and roll it against his. 
You broke apart like a deer in headlights when you heard footsteps nearby. You pushed Shohei and straightened your clothes. You wiped Shohei’s lipstick-stained mouth and ran away as fast as you could. Shohei, who was as kiss-hungry and love drunk as you were, could only smirk at your retreating form. 
During brunch, you sat with Aunt Olivia on your right and Shohei, by default, on your left side. You were trying to make conversation about the current weather news report while eating your plate of mashed potatoes, all while trying to avoid any contact with Shohei. 
He noticed you have been avoidant after the hot makeout session in the pantry. He put a hand on your thigh under the table, pinching it with reassurance.
“Are we good, Y/N?”
You nodded wordlessly and smiled at him. Something about the way Shohei’s attentiveness always hits you to your core. You’ve never felt this so cared for before that it’s almost bewitching. 
The party started getting up and divided: your aunts and uncles dancing happily on one side, your cousins taking selfies on the other. Meanwhile you and Shohei were left sitting comfortably by the dining table, enjoying the sweet ambiance of everyone around you. 
You held his arm gingerly, almost seductively when you felt his hard muscles from his shirt. A few moments ago, you had almost stripped him naked in the pantry with all of your aunt’s condiments as your audience.
“Why are you so toned? What are you working out for?” You said jokingly, pressing on his biceps in amazement.
“I’m preparing for the next man who tries to steal you.” He leaned in and whispered in your ear. You giggled. 
“No one can take me away from you!” You whispered back, resting your head on his shoulder. You were on your third glass of wine and it isn’t noon yet. You feel tipsy and giggly in the comfort of Shohei’s strong arms. 
“And this is a toast to our new couple, Y/N and Shohei, may this relationship be longer than the last one.” Uncle Ben bellowed, attracting laughter from the rest of the family. They clinked their glasses and toasted for the nth time today. 
You raised your own glass and sipped your wine. 
“Don’t mind them, they’re always like that when I bring a guy to brunch.”
He caressed your thigh and wanted to push the button. “Which guys?”
“Hm? Oh just Jack and Patrick. Although Patrick doesn’t count, because he’s my bestie.” Shohei looked at you and wondered who Patrick may be. He felt a bubbling feeling at the pit of his stomach. Is he jealous? Angry? That he wasn’t the first person you introduced to your family. He shrugged it off. This is just all an act, anyway. Get your shit together, man.
“This may be my favorite brunch ever.” You concluded, finishing the last few drops of your wine. Shohei stole the glass from your hand and replaced it with his. 
“The weather is perfect, the food is great, all of my mom’s family is here. And I don’t feel alone… thanks to you.” You traced circles on the back of Shohei’s palm with your thumb. 
“Why don’t we end this with a bang, Y/N?”
Shohei’s smile invites you to a peck on the lips. He held the back of your head and gently kissed you deeply, slowly this time. You don’t resist and he doesn’t let go. You hear cheers from the background as you kiss softly. Shohei kisses you for the last time today with the hopes that it removes the uncertainty in your mind. That when he kisses you better this time, it would change your mind. He prays to all the gods that would listen.
You melt into the moment and hope it never ceases, because you go back to normal after it ends. After today, you and Shohei will be two separate people once again. And that hurts the deeper parts of you without you realizing it. 
~~~~
Shohei escorted you back home after the brunch. You rode in complete silence all the way. You really really didn’t want it to end but you also didn’t want to drag Shohei into a life that you’re not a hundred percent sure of yet. 
“Thank you for the ride.” You hung back at the entrance and Shohei waited, hoping you’d say something more. “Thank you for everything you’ve done.”
He sighed. “Wait, Y/N. Is that it?”
“What do you mean?” 
“Are we just gonna go back to the way it was now that you’re done pretending?” He said almost angrily. 
“Well, that’s the plan, isn’t it?”
“That’s your plan. I don’t want this to end. Did you ever wonder why I had agreed to it without asking anything in return? Because I didn’t need to pretend at all. It was all real to me.”
You stood there dumbfounded at the sudden outburst of confession from him. You thought Shohei would be more than willing to go back to his old,  uninvolved life with you. But he was right. You never once stopped to think why he was more than willing to help you get away from Jack, or to help you lie in front of your family. 
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking properly when I asked you this…” You blink back tears forming. 
Shohei walks up to you and rests his hands on your shoulders. “I don’t want this to end. Do you?”
“I’m not sure I’m ready for all of this, Shohei.” You squeaked, finally finding your voice. 
“You’re the most attentive, thoughtful, and sincerest man I’ve ever been blessed to meet. Even I get breathless thinking how lucky I’d be if I let you in…
“This whole fake dating thing was a mess. I shouldn’t have dragged you into my problems.”
“Y/N. Please don’t shut me out. Let me in, I’d go to the trouble of warding off your ex-boyfriend if I need to. I’ll be here for whatever.” Shohei begged. You shook your head firmly.
“I’m not ready yet, Shohei. I loved every moment I have spent with you, but I need to be with myself for now.” 
Shohei dropped his hands to his sides and stepped back, his eyes glistening with tears. 
“See you around, then.”
You watched him walk away until he disappeared into his home. You closed your door and plopped down on the floor. The tears that you were holding back came gushing out, and finally you were bawling. You didn’t cry this hard when Jack cheated on you but when you saw Shohei walking away because of your own doing, you felt like your world had collapsed. You wept until there were no tears left to cry, until the only pain you have left to bear was the hollowness of what Shohei left. You crawled into a ball by the door, clothes unchanged, makeup running down your face. Fraulein snuggles up to you minutes after, sharing her warmth.
Looks like it's just you and me again, Fraulein. 
In the next couple of weeks, you would rise early to tend to your plants, volunteer additional hours in Novel Nook so you could get home later than usual, and avoid the farmer’s market. You added wearing a baseball cap or large hats as a new fashion ensemble to steer away from eye contact at the risk of bumping into Shohei. The thing  is, your efforts to avoid him were reduced to nil as you bumped into him everywhere you went. When you throw out the trash as early as five o'clock in the morning, he’d be there, warming up or jogging on your path.  When you went to the farmer's market later than usual, he was also there doing after-rush hour shopping. Even administering Fraulein’s medicine time was an arduous task seeing that she still hangs around Shohei’s porch, not understanding your human conflict and emotions towards each other. 
There are days when you feel better and the sun is shining, but there are also moments when you catch yourself at the brink of a breakdown. It takes a while for the loneliness to settle in like an unwanted guest, creeping over your shoulder, sometimes hugging you at night. It wasn’t this hard before you met Shohei, so how was it different now?
“All good, Y/N?” You lost your train of thought at the voice of Aunt Olivia. You couldn’t bear the loneliness and the quiet of your home that you packed your stuff and stayed for a week’s worth of vacation. She joined you in the indoor kitchen table, where you were having your mid-afternoon coffee. 
“Boy problems?” she suggested. One look from you and she already knew. 
“Aunt Liv, how do you know if you’re ready to love again?” You said after a moment of silence. 
“You don’t.” She smiled and cupped your hands. “You fuck around then find out.”
She chuckled to herself. “You remind me so much of your mom. She was always scared of trivial matters, like falling in love.
“But when she had a good taste in it, she never looked back.”
Aunt Liv has always been fond of her little sister. Your mom. And hearing these words from her, reminiscent of how she had been when she was your age, twinged at your heart a little bit. 
“I’m not the one who’d pry on your relationships, Y/N. But he’s a keeper, that boy. I thought he was joking at first, but he seems to be serious about it.”
You knitted your eyebrows together. “What do you mean by that?”
“He said something when I got him alone that day. He’d said, you were tougher than a potato under hot water. But he’s willing to wait for you to soften up no matter how hot it gets.”
Leave it to Shohei to drop potato metaphors to your relatives on their first meeting. 
“When a man like that comes around, I won’t ever let him go. You’re lucky if you ever meet the same kind of man twice.”
You pondered on about Aunt Liv’s advice for the rest of the day; by nighttime, you felt an epiphany dawn upon you. The next day, you packed up and went home earlier than you had planned. 
“Go get him, bubba.” Aunt Liv wished you luck. You’ll need all the luck you can get and hope it wasn’t too late. 
It took you approximately an hour to get home by taxi, the car zigzagging across the street. 
You don’t know why you were rushing. He wasn’t going anywhere, not to your knowledge. He will always be right where you left him but something inside you was telling you that a second more that you’re away from home, and you’d lose him. 
You were trying to catch your breath as you ran on your side of the street when you bumped into Shohei leaving your front lawn, a pail and shovel over his shoulders.
“Y/N? What are you doing here?” He was covered in dirt from the knee up, his white shirt sticking to his body and full of sweat. He looked a little shocked and panicked at being caught mid-exit from your garden. 
“I should ask you the same question. What were you doing in my lawn?” You tried to take a peek but Shohei covered your path with his wide body. “Did you bury a body there?”
“I think that’s a good idea for your fertilizer, Y/N!” He seemed a little agitated and making offbeat jokes to distract you. 
“Step away. What did you do to my garden?” You pushed him with all the adrenaline coursing through you and jogged towards your front lawn, expecting a murder crime scene or worse, a decaying garden. 
Instead, you saw hundreds of tulips in different shades and colors spread all throughout your garden. Purple and yellow tulips lined up the path towards your home. Red and pink tulips danced in the background, swaying every time a soft breeze brushed through. 
“You’re not supposed to see it yet. I thought you’d be back tomorrow night.” Shohei said, rubbing the nape of his head, embarrassed at being caught.
“You remembered when I said… At the farmer’s market…” You stammered.
“Yes, you went on and on about how much you love tulips.” You suddenly remembered the photo before the brunch party. How Shohei was looking fondly at you as he listened to you rambling on about something trivial. It wasn’t trivial to him because it was important to you. And he remembered. 
You turned around and faced him. You held out a hand and wiped a bit of sweat off of his face. “Did you do all of this… on your own?”
He nodded shyly. “That’s not all, though.” He whistled and called Dusty.
“You’re the most stubborn and one hell of a fiery woman. But you’re also the sweetest, softest, clingiest woman I’ve lucked out on. You’re so beautiful sometimes it hurts. After that second kiss, I knew right away that I’d have to fight tooth and nail for you to keep needing and wanting me."
Dusty bursted out of Shohei’s garden stringing along a reluctant Fraulein scruffed by the neck. Both of them were wearing cute red bow ties on their neck each laced with individual messages. 
You pulled Dusty’s message and read, “I want to call you “mom” so will you be my dad’s girlfriend?
You squealed in delight as you unraveled the next message pinned on Fraulein’s bow tie: “I loved him first but can you keep him forever?”
You swooned and laughed at the corniness and the teeth-rotting sweetness. You can’t help but jump into Shohei’s arms and give him a big hug despite all the sweat and grime on his body. 
“Ew, you got all your sweat on me.” You playfully joked at the parting.
“Hmm, you have no choice but to shower with me now.” He lifted you by the waist and carried you on top of his shoulders, both of you laughing and shrieking like newly weds on honeymoon, Dusty and Fraulein at your tails. 
.This place, this scene, and this warmth spreading through your chest up to your fingertips, all of it and the familiarity of it, you realized, is the only thing you need to live a lifetime of love and happiness. You were wondering where it was all this time and you understand now that it had been right beside you all along.
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