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stereopticons · 1 year ago

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2023 writing round-up

Rules: Share what you wrote this year! It can be works you posted to Ao3, Wattpad, Tumblr, or anywhere else! You can share everything you wrote or just the ones you're most excited about.

Thanks for the tags, @hippolotamus @rmd-writes @kiwiana-writes. This has been a rough year but hey, we've almost made it through.

January

we were loud like love [david/patrick, E, 5k]

David wears a collar. Tenderness and filth ensues.

the world would make sense again (if i held your hand) [twylexis, T, 2.7k]

Twyla finally tries to get over her fear of flying to go visit Alexis. Alexis tries to make it easier for her.

if you'll be my star, i'll be your sky [david/patrick, T, 1.2k]

A small, late-night moment of domestic bliss in the kitchen of the cottage.

puzzling it out [david/patrick, E, 1.9k, part of the wordplay series]

A wrong answer on a crossword puzzle prompts an interesting discovery for Patrick.

February

with a hand on your side of the bed [david/patrick, T, 2.3k]

Five times David falls asleep without Patrick, and one time they wake up together.

March

paint me up (you're my favorite color) for @blackandwhiteandrose [david/patrick, E, 2.5k]

David wears nail polish. Patrick has a lot of feelings about it.

let my love fix you up for @rosedavid [david/patrick, T, 1.7k]

After Patrick is injured while hiking, David takes care of him.

April

your secret's safe with me for @scrarefest [stevie/ruth, M, 3.1k]

Stevie enlists David's help to plan a surprise party for Ruth. It goes about as well as one would expect.

let our shadows fall away like dust for @hippolotamus [david/patrick, E, 3.2k]

David has a bad day. Patrick makes it better the best way he knows how.

May

tangle and stretch [david/patrick, T, 3.3k]

Patrick sees David on a magazine as a child, and David weaves his way into Patrick's life without either of them realizing it.

June

in the long tresses of your hair (i am a babbling brook) [david/patrick, T, 1.3k]

An airplane meet-cute-ish in which Patrick finds himself obsessed with David's hair.

July

(B)13 Reasons Why [david/patrick, T, 3.1k]

collab with @blackandwhiteandrose. Patrick gives David a gift for their 13th wedding monthiversary.

i'll miss you from this place that i stand [david/patrick, T, 1.4k]

After the wedding, all the Roses leave Schitt's Creek within a few weeks of one another. David doesn't handle it very well.

catch my breath to breathe your name [david/patrick, E, 358]

Patrick and David have explored a lot of things together. At the heart of it all is love.

August

never knew a home until i found your hands [alex/henry, E, 1.1k]

Henry and Alex get a little handsy (and have some feelings) at the lakehouse.

touch me [david/patrick, T, 546]

An incomplete list of the ways David and Patrick touch each other during the wedding.

September

knock on wood [david/patrick, E, 3.4k, part of the every year we get a bit closer series]

Five wood-related fifth anniversary gifts that Patrick gives to David, and one (or two) that David gives to Patrick.

you can tell everybody (that this is your song) [david/patrick, T, 1k]

A story of falling in love and David and Patrick trying to find their way to each other told through a series of drabbles inspired by song lyrics.

crossed words and open hearts for @sc-passions-and-pastimes [david/patrick, E, 2.6k, part of the wordplay series]

Five times David needs help with a crossword puzzle and one time he doesn't.

parallax for @sc-passions-and-pastimes [david/patrick, T, 5k]

collab with @indestructibleheart.

Patrick doesn't have an eye for art; he doesn't pay much attention to painting or sculptures. But he likes photography. Well, he likes a photographer in particular, anyway. The mysterious artist known only as D.R. — a black-and-white film photographer from New York — may have disappeared from the world years ago... but Patrick still treasures the one print he'd purchased during a business trip in the city. After all, it may have given him the courage to break his own heart, move to a city he'd never heard of, and meet the love of his life. He hasn't thought about in years. That is, until he's picking up lunch at the café and something familiar catches his eye. The tone, the light — he'd know an original D.R. photo anywhere. "Oh, this?" Twyla grinned, pointing to the frame on the restaurant wall. "David gave me that."

October

everybody's waiting for the next surprise [david/patrick, T, 1.4k]

Stevie drags David to a haunted house on Halloween. They run into a kind stranger in a blue button down in the group ahead of them. You know how this story goes.

November

my misspent youth and my slow decline [david/patrick, T, 800]

Four characters reflect on something that haunts them through four double drabbles. Or, the author projects feelings onto an unprecedented four characters at once.

December

ribbons and bows [david/patrick, E, 1.7k, WIP]

Daily advent calendar drabbles for Schitt's Creek

my only wish is one more year (and then i want them all) [alex/henry, E, 1.7k, WIP]

Daily advent calendar drabbles for RWRB

And, god willing, two Frozen Over fics and one RWRB 5+1 before the end of the year.

I haven't been tracking who's done this, so apologies for tagging you if you already have! @apothecarose @chelle-68 @lizzie-bennetdarcy @lilythesilly @nontoxic-writes @blackandwhiteandrose and anyone else who wants to share!

#sorry for the long post #2023 writing round up #schitt's creek #rwrb

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thornofthelily · 1 year ago

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@pinksparkl tagged me in this, what, like a week ago? But I wasn't able to sit down to organize my thoughts because I've been busy with life lol

So here it goes! My 5 + 1 headcanons! 5 Redactedverse headcanons I hold and 1 I'm still working on!

(Sorry if these are supposed to be like, fics, because I don't really have many posted fics or wips right now lmao)

1. Will is basically our silly old grandpa vampire now, but he carefully cultivated that reputation after centuries of brutality. There's a reason the gentle-voiced, teasing, Bob Ross-loving vampire survived to become an old blood king, and it wasn't always through kindness. There's a reason he wants to be a good maker, and also, why he's reluctant to turn people (and no, it's not Alexis's fault for being a "hellion")

2. Lovely was in college when they met Vincent. They had moved to Dahlia for regular human school, and it was the first time they'd been away from home. They were trying to balance school and work and maintain their friendships from back home, but it wasn't going well. They were feeling pretty lonely and not adjusting to life in Dahlia well, and that's why they went to Wonderworld for the first time. They thought it would be a good story for their friends at home, or impress someone from their classes there. They felt like they had something to prove. (When their core was awoken and they switched to DAMN, they finally started making friends and fitting in in a way they never felt like they had among humans. They still had some human friends but DAMN was the first place they felt like they belonged.)

3. Not an original but a goodie I think, but I am ten thousand percent in camp "Angel and Guy are siblings." And honestly, I've come to accept "Angel" as being their actual name. Like, their real names from birth are Guy, and Angel. Their parents liked those oddly specific, literal names. Their boy child is a Guy, their sweet (as a baby) child is an Angel.

4. "Dear" (Lasko's listener) first really fell for him during the Inversion. They were stuck outside with everyone else, and though they didn't have anyone they were especially close to inside, they were still scared sick for their coworkers and students. They had always been passively aware of and attracted to Lasko, and normally they'd never risk the discomfort of flirting with or asking out a coworker, but after Inversion, they had so much respect and admiration for him for how he stood up and got people organized and inspired them and everyone else to rush in to take down shades and find survivors, they finally decided to be brave and ask him out, long after the dust finally settled.

5. Asher is actually incredible well-read and loves literature. Before becoming the goofy gamer loud mouth can't cook beta we all know and love, his mom being a writer meant he grew up surrounded by books all the time. He gained most of his emotional intelligence through reading, and if things ever got tense in the pack, he tended to retreat to a book, read the whole thing in one night, and come back rejuvenated and refreshed and ready to help resolve whatever issues people had the day before.

And for the one I'm still working on...

With all the discussion going around, it made me want to revamp my race/ethnicity headcanons. Full disclosure, I know I'm not the best at writing diversely, it's an issue I'm aware of and I am trying to work on. It requires a few drafts of my ocs to get past the same pale template I default to. So, in examining my hcs for the various speaker and listener characters, while I already had a few, I was looking for other characters I could spice up past the same template, and I am working on the idea of having a Philippino Guy (and by extension, Angel). I haven't done much to expand this idea or flesh it out with any greater detail, but it fits pretty well in my head so far!

#redacted asmr #redacted audio #redacted headcanons #five + 1 game #redacted william #redacted lasko #redacted asher #redacted lovely #redacted guy #redacted angel

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red-and-white-and-black-and-gold · 1 year ago

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Hi! Redoing my pinned post to include an introduction because no one reads bios I guess! xP

I’m Eleanor, but you can call me any nicknames derived from that or make up your own if you want! I’m very fond of nicknames except the ones my siblings give me <3

This is my side blog! My main is @write-the-stars. I am probably more active over there as I post about most non-football things over there, and I try very hard to keep all football/soccer and football rpf contained to this blog. So, follow my main if you want to know about my life and non football related interests!

My AO3 is Heavens_Gaze_Avert

Feel free to message me to chat about whatever, here or on my main! Puedo hablar/escribir español bastante bien también si prefieres o es más comfortable para tí <3

Blog Navigation (under the cut!):

Individual players I tag by their names.

Ships don’t get special tags unless I really like them.

Here are my ship tags:

Neymar X Messi: Surcease of sorrow

Ramos X Messi: Fall in love but go down swinging

Luka Modric X Sergio Ramos: As the poets say

Neymar X Sergio Ramos: Likliest unlikely

Julián Álvarez X Enzo Fernández: Cuties

Antony X Lisandro Martinez: Conflagration Hearts

Aaron Ramsdale X Ben White: Lambs to the altar

Martin Ødegaard x Granit Xhaka: King and counselor

Sergio “Kun” Agüero x Lionel Messi: the paths we walk

Aaron Ramsdale x Martin Ødegaard: Gold is your colour

Alexis Mac Allister x Darwin Núñez: Mate mates

Martin Ødegaard x Declan Rice: I met a man in Dublin town

Kai Havertz x Martin Ødegaard: oh promised princes where have you gone? To what crown will you lay claim? (Changed to:) I see where I’m going I see where I’ve been

Kai Havertz/Declan Rice: when i met you in the summer

Non Ship relationship tags:

Martin Ødegaard & Mikel Arteta: like looking in a mirror

Martin Ødegaard & Bukayo Saka: on a tall ship at night

Miscellaneous Tags:

Pose for a pic = my tag for photo shoots and any other photos that look to be deliberately posed

You’ve got a smile that can light up this whole town = my tag for any photo, gif, video, etc. of players where their smiles are the focus/highlight

The childrens = for when player or manager kids are prominent or a focal point of an image, video, gif, etc. I don’t tag individual children by name because I find it a bit creepy tbh

Hugs <3 = for when hugs are the focal point or just my favourite part of the image, video, etc.

E watches = if I am live-blogging a match I try to use this tag. Sometimes I forget.

E listens = if I am live blogging a match but only have radio commentary, I use this tag instead. Sometimes I forget.

E rambles = miscellaneous original posts, can range from personal anecdotes to well thought out mini essays.

Kitastic = talking about kits

Prompts abound = talking about fic prompts/requests

live!live!live! = posts about games that I have attended live and in person!

Struck through tags are no longer in active use but I won’t delete them because I am an archivist at heart.

I’ll update this if/when I add new ones or think of something else useful to say. <3

#blog navigation #intro post #blog intro

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dinnfameron · 2 years ago

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Find the word challenge

rules: share snippets of your work containing each of the words the previous poster selected for you (optional addition: if you can't find the word in your WIPs, or you simply don't have any WIPs, you can just write a sentence around the word)

I was tagged by @smblmn, thanks pal!!

I haven't written a word in months, but I've been trying to get back into it. It was fun to dip into the old WIP folder again. Some of these are from very long ago, and the chance of me finishing any of them is small. But it could happen!

my words were: choice, light, falter, book, and ring

snippets below the cut.

Choice (from the eternally in progress ‘Patrick is a werewolf’ prequel)

Patrick Brewer would never, could never, be so cruel. So selfish. Patrick Brewer would never take more than what was given to him. He would never break the thing he’d built so carefully. He’d think it through, be patient, make the right choice, the rational choice.

Light (from a post series domestic Halloween thing that I just don't know how to end ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

“Go,” Patrick tells them both. “Go now, while you still can.” As they scurry off, David shuts the door, and Patrick turns off the front porch light. “That’s probably enough trick or treating for this year, don’t you think?” he asks. “The chili’s ready if you want some actual food to go with your candy.”

“I think you know that I don’t,” David admonishes, clutching the candy bowl to his chest. “But I’ll have some later, thank you.”

Falter (from my 'marriage of convenience but it's complicated' AU)

“No, you’re right,” the guy says, giving no indication that he’s been sufficiently chastised. “Sorry,” he holds out a hand, “Patrick.”

“Not interested,” David replies, and okay, it’s a little bitchy. But he’s not adequately caffeinated for small talk in elevators with overly familiar strangers. Plus, his dad had insisted on his presence at a 9 a.m. meeting, which was beyond David’s level of comfort for myriad reasons. So, yeah, he’s feeling a bit bitchy to begin with.

Bitchy enough to revel a little in the way Patrick’s smirk falters as he drops his hand. Patrick crosses his arms over his chest, leaning a shoulder against the same wall as David, and looks him up and down once more.

Book (from an alternate first meeting AU where david meets patrick over zoom when patrick presents a business webinar)

“Ugh! It looks like Grey Gardens in here, David!” Alexis cries from the doorway. David casts her a venomous look from where he’s sprawled on his bed and watches her gingerly pick her way through piles of his books and papers to her side of the room.

Ring (from my beloved high school AU that i absolutely do not know how to finish)

David feels fairly certain not one other person at this party knows how to do whatever Patrick just did, but he doesn’t say so.

“Well…thank you,” he says instead.

“That is accurate,” David agrees.

“I mean, I am the reason it was down there in the first place, so…”

“You going to put it back on, or…?” Patrick prompts.

“...just righting a wrong, really,” Patrick finishes. David nods, still holding the ring in his hand, staring at it like he’s seeing it for the first time.

“It’s just—it was in the dirty pipe, though.”

I'm sure most of you who want to have done this, but I'm tagging: @sspaz1000 @tyfinn @swiftlythebest @beaiola and anyone else who wants to be tagged.

My words for you are: sweet, field, sell, shine, try

#tag game #let me tell you about my wips #oh to finish something again

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heiserosandhesapollo · 2 years ago

Note

that blazed post was satire right

REAL fucking suspicious that all these rolled into my inbox in a single night, back to back. Almost like you forgot to turn on anon for half of them 🤔🤔🤔

But let's go ahead and give you the benefit of the doubt.

"How to be a trans man (according to the internet)" was loosely inspired by Sherman Alexie's "How To Write The Great American Indian Novel" in the sense that I wanted to do non-rhyming couplets that directly contradicted each other to point out how people outside of a marginalized group stereotype and fetishize said group. (Alexie's poem is much, much better than mine. He breaks the format pretty quickly and the last two lines are the greatest gut-punch I've ever read in a poem. I am white and did not want to appropriate an indigenous man's pain, so I tried to only take broad inspiration from the opening lines and go in my own direction.)

Now, with that context, let's examine the title.

"How to be a trans man" denotes a set of instructions or rules for behavior. But the poem has a parenthetical, "(according to the internet)", which implies that these are not the author's (my) rules, but rather something that comes *from* the internet. Reading the poem I used as inspiration, and the last two lines, "In the Great American Indian novel, when it is finally written,/ all of the white people will be Indians and all of the Indians will be ghosts," we can infer that this is a poem not about representation, but about cultural appropriation (and, really, genocide). It is not meant to be serious advice, but layers of irony about how colonizers use literature as a tool to erase an entire culture.

When you take irony into consideration, you can then look at the structure of my poem.

Every couplet (except the final one) starts with "You must", with the second line starting with "but". This sets an expectation, then immediately limits or contradicts the expectation. For instance:

"You must have a common, boring name,/ but nothing as common as "Aiden."" If you pay any attention to how trans men's names are treated, you may have heard jokes about trans men having the names of "Drowned Victorian orphans", which is just a way to say that trans men pick old fashioned, pretentious, or "weird" names. A trans man who is not out may see these jokes and therefore try to steer towards really common names, especially ones that are common *right now*. This meant that a few years ago, there was a flood of trans mascs naming themselves "Aiden". But again, if you've paid attention to the treatment of trans men the last few years, you'll know that "Aiden" is used to insult trans men with "basic" names.

Again, look to the title of the poem. This is how *the internet* tells trans men to behave - giving them one set of instructions and then immediately punishing them for following it. The poem uses an ironic structure to show the irony that trans men experience daily.

All of the lines in the poem were either things I have been told to my (digital) face, or seen other trans men on Tumblr, Twitter, Youtube, and Tiktok been told.

Now, not to be mean, but perhaps do some literary analysis when you find a poem that rubs you the wrong way. Look at the title, structure, imagery. Perhaps even look at the rest of the author's work - if you search my blog for "trans", you'll find multiple poems about the trans male experience (my personal favorite is "I relate to werewolves for more than just aesthetic reasons"). These, taken together, paint a pretty straightforward picture of my views on the trans male experience.

I'll admit, had I gotten these asks when I first posted these poems, I would've freaked out, wondering if I was being too subtle. But at this point, with over 4,000 notes on the post and tons of people in the tags telling me that they have felt the exact emotions of the poem... I think you and anon either aren't taking the time or don't care to actually analyze a (pretty straightforward) poem.

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tlacehualli · 2 years ago

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KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER. ( REPOST DO NOT REBLOG ! )

name: alexis but you can call me lexi pronouns: she / they / a bad bitch preference of communication: discord. i'm pretty sure tumblr dms are fucking haunted idk they're terrible. i mean it's fine though either way. just be prepared for me to like either forget dms or like dm you incessantly, i only have two speeds. name of muse(s): Olivia Colomar, aka Sombra experience/how long (months/years?): oh man let me tell you. i'm 31 now, started roleplaying when I was like 9 on NEOPETS ROLEPLAYING BOARDS. from there, moved on to AIM and just used Neopets to recruit on over to the superior platform. quit for a long time, came to tumblr probably 2012 ish? on and off until maybe 2014 2015 i don't really recall, then i was gone untillll now. so. a long time. idk. don't make me do math outside of work. platforms you’ve used: neopets, AIM, tumblr best experience: man, finding the homie sue again has been lit, and ofc getting to meet all her pals. other than that, the absolute shedding of my old perfectionism and all the pressure i used to put on myself. that's why i write like a demon now. nothing to hold me back. feels good! feels freeing. i am a god. no i am not. pet peeves / dealbreakers: i do not like pushy people. it used to be more of an issue before when i didn't write at the speed of light because i kept giving myself anxiety about everything but you know what, it sure didn't fucking help. also in the context of like, when we're in a thread and you're trying to make this one thing happen really weirdly and i'm just like idk man. kind of odd. but that hasn't happened in years. just like this uwu pushy sexual thing usually. fluff, angst, or smut: sombra is pretty easily in both fluff and angst. smut is personally a little weird for me but if it feels right then sure whatever, but the former two are more my speed generally plots or memes: oh absolutely plots but i can meme with the best of them. best time to write: i work from home and i write fast as hell. work fast as hell too. thank you ritalin for all you have given me. so yeah. rn. do it. you wont. are you like your muse(s): a disturbing amount, to be sure. around the same age, similar ethnic background, similar field of work (engineering vs what computer science or some shit), we're both of us trolls, hell both got some pretty serious trauma involving death. i did take liberties and added more similarities but counting those seems like cheating. i do generally take up muses that are like me in some way, usually at that point in time. had a ryuko matoi and a lightning that were both perfect in their time but i could not write them at all now 'cause i'm OLD.

tagged by: @femtaile tagging: you. i am perceiving you.

#memes #tagged in #reblogging cause i got tagged in it twice since #here is all u need to know about me (i am a loser)

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nevenabadr · 4 years ago

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50 Shades of You! Tom Hiddleston X Female! Reader

Note: This is my first ever fanfiction for Tom Hiddleston. I have not written fiction for ages. English is not my first language.

Inspiration: this is inspired by:

“I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be buried in thy eyes.”

–Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing

Word count: 2660

Warnings: Romance, sweet words, and smut–this is +21 and not for everyone.

Enjoy reading and please comment with your feedback. 💚

-------------------------------------------------------

During the summer Cambridge University was having a conference "Gothic Elements In John Milton's Paradise Lost." As you the young professor of literature, the coordinate manager suggested that the University alumnus could join for not just attending, but acting a piece of the tragedy. Amongst the candidates was the Classic department graduate and famous actor, Tom Hiddleston.

You know that he might have scheduled issues or time conflicts, but you suggested the committee email him. To your surprise, he accepted the offer.

The scene of choice was casting the devil out of hell.

On the stage during the conference eve, you did not have the perfect time to watch him, but you took a glimpse of acting from far.

He even caught your show and face attending the rehearsals.

The conference day was pressuring. You were trying to get everything right, in the middle of your so-close meltdown. A voice brought you to reality, "Hello, is this professor Y/N)?"

You turned to find the British handsome alumni smiling peacefully at you. "Yes, how can I help you?"

"Indeed, I am the one offering help." As he adjusted his glasses, I asked the committee manager to take upon some errant backstage. Maybe I can assist with the front ceremony?"

"Of course," you paused for a moment, "can you help me with the dinner's seats arrangement? My assistant is absent and I have to print and arrange them myself."

"Just show me a computer and all will be done."

Both of you took your time arranging an evening missing up some seats.

"Here comes my name. You will be seated with the professors, of course!" He was busy putting name tags over the table.

"Oh! Don't remind me." You replied as if it is a conversation with an old friend and continued "the Classic department and Literature."

"They might start a war." Both of you started laughing

"I have an idea." He took a tag from his table and moved yours next to his. "Now you will be with a friend"

The presentations finished, you had to go for the gym showers to change and wear your conference and dinner dress.

By the time you arrived, the scene from the tardy was about to be played. You took your place in the front seat.

Tom was playing Satan. He noticed that you were reciting the lines with him. He even almost smiles at you. Could not hold himself from looking at you in the front row while playing the scene of...

"All is not lost; the unconquerable Will, And study of revenge, immortal hate, And courage never to submit or yield; (And what is else not to be overcome?) That glory never shall his wrath or might Extort from me to bow and sue for grace With suppliant knee and deify his power, Who from the terror of his arm so late Doubted his empire[.] (I, 106–114)"

Your facial expressions captured his eyes, the movement of your lips and then the flame of your applause.

At the dinner, he was interested to hear all about your work and writings. His eyes could not able to leave you.

By the end of the dinner, he walked you to your car, "this was lovely, thank you for tonight"

You smiled at him, "thank you for accepting our invitation."

You shake hands and opened your car door like the gentleman he is.

"Would you like to go out with me, for a coffee? Books and coffee, maybe." He did not hesitate to ask.

"I would love to. You already have my number within the conference contact information." You raised an eyebrow and smirked.

As your car drove away, he knew he was up for an adventure.

Three months later, you are happily dating and sharing sweet kisses. He suggested a film marathon. Each week one of you chose a topic.

That Saturday's topic was Russian Literature and you had to add: "or inspired by it"

"Excuse me, but Tolstoy has no comparison!" He grimaced

"Shadow and Bones, love!" You teased him, "it the Netflix adaption of the era"

"After Anna Karenina, please," he sounded like an old professor.

"Alright then, deal." You tickled him and kissed his lips softly

Both of you enjoyed Anna Karenina, however, you were crying in his arms.

"That dreadful ending."

He hugged you "Hey, Shadow and Bones will make it up to you, let me make extra popcorn." Once again, he kissed you.

He came back with popcorn that will at least survive three episodes. You snuggled between his arms.

"Look at Alexie, how he said 'Make me your villain.'"

You were swooning as a fangirl.

"I beg your pardon, I am literally a villain," he complained

Oh! I would literally," stressing upon the last word, "let him have me"

His face was irritated and you not coming close to making love made him anxious, that you might not be ready. He never inquired about you.

You caressed his tummy, "hey, a penny for your thoughts, sir." It sounded like one of the Jack the Ripper prostitutes, about which you have constantly been talking.

His voice evolved deeper and his eyes did not leave yours "your deepest sexual desire. What do you crave?"

Comparing to your age, you were nervous and inexperienced. "My life was spent between books. I..."

He did not let you continue speaking and took your lips between his drawing your body closer to him, uttering between his hot kisses "I am not just a villain" his lips made the earth move "I am a God" whispering against the sport skin of your nick " a king" his hands were moving down the same tomes his lips reached the line of your bosom whilst his hand slides prevailed touching down pussy and dug his fingers driving you till the edge.

"I want you," you whispered between your soft moans.

He neglected your cravings and maintained his rhythm, watching your complexion and closed eyes till you arched your back in awe.

You collapsed between his arms heavily breathing "that was extremely wonderful, but I need you"

He kissed your lips playfully. "you are a delicious girl, Y/N, but..."

You hashed him with a kiss that he pulled from "if your life was between books, I want you to write me your deepest desire."

"Darling, it was a series, Alexie is fictional." You wrapped your arms around his neck.

"Fictional or not, he is a man, you are paying for this."

He was deadly serious "write me your longing."

You laugh "What? Like the 50 Shades of Y/N?"

He gazed into your eyes "aiming to please and punish you, darling, avenging my honour"

The next morning when you were with your family on Sunday's lunch, he opened an email titled "50 Shades of Y/A"

The content was as follows:

"You!"

He grinned to himself and determined to show her how fiction can become real.

Your week was busy. He had signed a new contract for a mini-series and was supposed to film soon.

Not replying to your email made you nervous, even went meeting for dinner. He was quiet about it.

You checked your sent box millions of times to make sure it arrived. Still, you knew he was busy working, and you were busy with the finals coming soon.

Thursday’s dinner, nothing yet, nothing but gaggling and discussing your days and current reads.

"Darling, we did not decide this week's marathon"

He did not take his eyes off the menu "Are not you having a big family week, you should go" he was confident and calm.

Deep inside you wanted to grab his neck and jiggle him, but for the lady you are and the restaurant, you were calm.

"Wonderful!"

The dinner was over; he drove you home, kissed you goodnight.

Saturday morning, a ringing at your door. Apparently, you received a package, a big one.

You kept thinking that some books might have come early from your publisher. Unwrapping it to a surprise satin 1950 coat with Ruby red entourage and black heels.

There was also a note, she recognised the handwriting:

"Wear nothing but this for your punishment. If other pieces were found upon your body, then fear my fury and vengeance.

Love,

So, it was her version of Mr Grey. But have you ever been ready to comply with anyone?"

Suddenly, a message arrived on your phone

"Reminder, a black will pick you tonight at 8, don't disobey me, Princess."

Your heel clicked on the floor as a man dressed in an old fashion suit opened the car for you. The windows were blacked out, so you did not see where it was heading.

"Welcome, Princess," he greeted you as if you were royalty, "My master is awaiting your presence."

You took his hands. The place was carved out of one of your favourite dark fantasies, a mansion with gargoyles, dark lighting, and a vast garden.

You could not believe your eyes. Tom knew your deepest desires indeed.

But that is not the end.

The inside was as of a dark enchantment with deep red flowers and candles. The servant showed you the way to a dining room fit for a feast. Tom was not there.

"My master requires you to await his arrival." The servant bowed and left.

You were like a child been left inside her favourite toyshop. The ornaments, the lighting, and even the shapes of the food. That aesthetic you only could dream of but never reach.

"Enjoying yourself already?" You turned to find your man dressed in a black Victorian suit. His face was shaved, shorter hair, no glasses. Just all of the handsome glory.

You took a step forward "no princess, I shall come for you"

He kissed your hand and then sat on the table's head, while it sat on the opposite side and faced you away indeed.

"Are you pleased, princess?" He raised his glass of red wine.

"Yes, my Prince." You smile.

"In here, you shall address me as your king." His eyes lit with fire, and his voice was harsh.

You played along and raised an eyebrow "my king."

"This is not a game, princess, you are my prisoner"

You dined quietly, as he did not drop his eyes from you.

"Enjoying yourself?"

You flirted "deeply, my king"

He left his chair and came closer to you, his fingers left your chain so you can gaze into your eyes.

He asked, "care for a dance?"

You smiled "I would love to."

You stepped forward and took his hand to a ballroom, just for you and him, the dark king.

The following piece of music was sensual and moving.

"The coat, princess, I want to see nothing but heels on your body,"

You obeyed the king, but for a tick. When you took it off, underneath it a short emerald green strapless corset dress tight upon the curves of your body and pushed your bosoms to their glory.

He grinned and his eyes darken "looking for further punishment, I suppose?"

"Anything to please the king." You took his hand and kissed it. He did not expect it.

He turned furiously and the next song was romantic. He wrapped his arms around you once again, waltz, you sneaky woman, deserved joy before being punished.

Twirling you on the dance floor like the earth has no one but the two of you.

By the end, he carried you "to my chambers, little one"

You were nervous and anxious. What if he did not like what was underneath the dress?

He entered a candlelight room with a four-poster bed in the centre. The curtains of the bed were black and emerald.

He laid you in bed, kissing your lips and playing with your hair.

His breathing was heating against your skin.

"You won't miss that dress, will you, princess?"

He did not wait for your reply as he lifted a dagger amongst the layers of his suit and cut the corset down to the last piece of the dress.

You wore nothing else. You were lying exposed as he stood to look upon your naked curves for the first time.

You spontaneously tried to cover your bosom and private parts.

"No, do not you dare" he was angry and you could not distinguish reality from fantasy.

You throw the rest of the dress away. Hands laying by your head and he stood there for a juncture, gazing at every inch of your body.

"Turn," he ordered angrily as if the soul of Loki took over him, "I said, turn"

You nearly dropped tears "here my king"

You felt the softness of his lips upon your delicate shoulders.

Kissing the line of your spine. He knows this will work like magic. You tickle from your back, now trying to lick you, taste you, slap you.

He flipped you to face him. You were sobbing. He could hear it under your moans.

"You are not a princess, you are not a queen."

He wipes her tears from her cheek "you are a goddess and I am your slave."

You giggled between your tears, wrapping your arms around his neck "my king"

"Your, slave" As his voice became softer, he hushed you with a finger.

He kissed every inch of your body. You were playing with his short blonde locks.

"Let me worship your bosom, my goddess" he kissed, licked and played with your nipples and cupped your bosoms gently.

Kissing down till he reached your pussy, "Let me worship your temple" as he licked your clitoris.

You were moaning loader now

“Not this time, my king I want you inside me."

"Alright, as the pleasure of my goddess, I shall obey."

He adjusted his weight on you and asked, "wider for me, my goddess of beauty"

You opened for him as he enters you for the first time. You let out a loud breath "are you alright" he took your hands between his.

"Continue, my king."

He is just thrusting himself gently inside you. Your moans filling the room

"I am a villain, a king, a god, and a man"

Your hands were free to run along his back as he continued, "a man, no, a slave for my goddess"

You were moving with him and moaning louder, "my king, what else?"

Thursinting himself harder and moving with a faster pace.

"My goddess, the sculptures of beauty," between his breathing and moaning "Da Vinci would not be able to capture your grace"

You were kissing as your nail dug inside his shoulders.

His last whispers as moving himself inside your pussy which was clutching around his manhood. He moved with pace, as you rocked your lap against him

"I will live in thy heart," kissing your lips as you bite his lower lip between your steamy breath. "Die in thy lap, and be buried in thy eyes.”

He was going faster now and you were in tremendous awe and your skin was heating up with your pleasure.

"Look at me goddess" you were closing your eyes as you become close to you your orgasm "look at me," he ordered

"I love thee, Tom," you said as your pussy was clutching around his manhood and trembling underneath him. His enormous climax followed your orgasm.

You were shaking. He used his hands to keep himself from crushing you with his weight.

He rested his forehead on yours till both of you caught your breath. Gently took you between his arms as resting on his side "and I love thee, Y/N"

kissed you and as you were falling asleep, yet muttered, "I made you my villain, did not I?"

He giggles, "I beg your pardon, your God, King, and lover"

You kissed for the last time of that night and snuggle between peacefully each other's arms.

----------------------------------------------------

Tag list:

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@imsebastiansta-n

@brokenwitty

@221bshrlocked (awaiting your feedback)

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#marvel #fan fiction #tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston x you #Loki #loki fic #Loki Smut #tom hiddleston × reader #Crimson Peak #Thor #loki laufeyson #Disney Loki #tom hiddelston x reader #tom hiddelston imagine #tom hiddleston fanfiction #tom hiddleston fandom #tom hiddleston one shot #Tom Hiddleston OneShot #Tom Hiddleston x you

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axwalker · 4 years ago

Text

Creep 2: I don’t care if it hurts

HIGH SCHOOL AU

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC (Lexie O’Brien) Book TRR

MASTERLIST HERE

Synopsis: Drake and Lexie are star-crossed lovers. Her father hates him and forces Lexie to stop any contact with Drake. Lost and heartbroken, he “bullies” her for two years until he discovers the truth of Lexie’s behavior.

A/N 1 This came up to me after I got an ask from @nestledonthaveone to write a fic based on the song CREEP.

I used to hear this song when I was a teenager, so when I read this ask, I immediately wanted to write something angsty but situated in high school.

A/N 2: Because they’re younger than usual, I decided to change my FC.

Words: 4,110

WARNINGS: Parental abuse, domestic violence, toxic love.

THIS IS NOT YOUR USUAL MARSHMALLOW DRAKE. He was abandoned as a boy, he’s tortured and he doesn’t know how to express his love. His behavior is not excusable.

This is a dark love story. If you’re not comfortable with it, PLEASE do not read it.

ALL MY FICS ARE 18+

TAGS ON THE COMMENTS

As this is darker than usual; I’m only tagging the people who commented in the previous chapter. If you want to get on or off the list for this fic, please do not hesitate to ask!!

DRAKE

Even if she never looks at me or speaks to me again, she’s mine. Even if I’ve been a horrible jerk to her for two years and she pales every time I pull into the parking lot on my motorcycle, she is mine. Just seeing her with him enrages me, so I walk straight toward my usual seat, directly behind Lexie, and slam my textbook down onto the desk.

Startled, Rys looks up at me, “Hey, Walker. What’s up?”

It’s not the first time he tries to make a move on Lexie. Last time –two years ago, we almost killed each other. Pretty boy might be an entitled ass, but he knows how to fight. Maybe he thinks Lexie is game again after all this time. He couldn’t be more wrong.

“Don’t you have a class this period?” I ask him. Liam cocks his left eyebrow, adjusting the straps of his backpack.

“I fail to see why that concerns you, Creep.”

My smile is murderous. “Get the fuck out of here before I break your face, pretty boy.”

I think he has a death wish because he looks at Lexie when he talks, “See you after class, Alexis, when your watchdog will be busy mowing my lawn.” Finally, he just shakes his head and gets out of the classroom. I resume my daily routine. Staring at the back of Lexie’s head, tracing the curve of her perfect neck, my cock getting hard over her perfect cherry scent.

“So that’s what you like,” I say, leaning forward to speak an inch from her ears. “You like them with blond hair and pink polo shirts. Prospects for Cambridge or shit. A huge trust fund. Don’t you? A brat like you needs someone who can spoil her. I bet you’d introduce him to daddy, wouldn’t you?”

She doesn’t respond. She never does. Her eyes stay stubbornly on the front of the class where the teacher has started writing today’s lesson on the board—my hands fist in desperation. I’m dying for her to talk to me. To look at me. Anything. “Too bad, Lexie. I’ll scare every single one of those fucking entitled boys off. You’re going to sit alone in your house on prom night, crying into your designer sheets like a baby. And I’m going to enjoy it.”

The only sign that she hears me at all is the quickening rise and fall of her shoulders. Even that tiny display that I’ve upset her is agonizing, floods me with self-loathing, but I can never stop. She ripped out my fucking heart, and I can’t deal with the consequences of that alone. I can’t let her go. I’ll never let her go. This toxic feeling is the only thing left between us. My hands shake with the urge to take her in my arms, to stop the trembling I caused. To protect her from everything. Even myself. I’d love to move my fingers up into the silky, brown hair that reaches the middle of her graceful neck. I don’t have a lot of money; most of the cash I earn as a handyman goes to food and fixing my dad’s cabin, but I’d give every last cent for her to turn and lock those soft brown eyes on me, just one last time. Sometimes when I jerk off, all it takes is fantasizing about Lexie looking at me, giving me one of those shy smiles, and I lose it. One stroke. Maybe two. Done. I can’t breathe without having her close. And I can’t breathe with her close. It’s a strange condition, this obsession, but she’s an addiction that I just can’t give up.

How could I? She’s intelligent, strong, and so damned gorgeous. Once upon a time, I thought she had a good heart too. But that was before she broke my pathetic heart only because I’m poor. I’ve been hurting since then, and I need her to hurt too. To know what it feels.

“Do you actually think that dumb rich boy would be a good choice for your first time, Lexie?” I grip my desk so tight it nearly breaks down, just thinking about her being kissed –touched by someone else. “At least that’s one thing us poor motherfuckers have going for us. We know how to fuck. If you went out with Rys for a while, you’d eventually give in and come slumming it one night, wouldn’t you? Knock on my rundown cabin door, begging me to fuck you as we both know you’d like.”

A pretty blush is starting to climb her neck. I have to take a deep breath to keep from kiss her pink cheeks. But I think if I got to touch her skin, my wall of bullshit would crumble. I’ve only fucked one girl. Since seeing Lexie for the first time freshman year, there’s been no one but her. I want no one else. She owns my cock as sure as she owns my heart. How easily she’s forgotten about both leaving me in agony.

“Stop,” she breathes. I freeze. Did she just speak to me? It’s the first time in two years that she’s even remotely acknowledged my existence.

“Lexie,” I managed to say. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. That’s all it took. One pleading word out of her mouth, and I’m done.

“Just stop,” she says again, turning her head slightly. “Please.”

I fall back in my chair, my heart thundering on my chest. If we weren’t in the middle of class, if I didn’t feel like a monster, I would pull her into my arms right now. I’d hug her until she stopped struggling, then beg her to hit me, bruise me, make me pay for every shitty thing I’ve ever said to her. But before long, the class is over, and she’s leaving the classroom to get out of here. To put distance between us as quickly as possible—and I have no choice but to watch her because I feel physically ill. Still, I manage to get out into the student-packed hallway, my plan to apologize for being crude and a jerk and torturing her for so long.

My head is telling me not to apologize, though. It’s telling me she deserved it for being such a snob, for breaking me, for valuing money and status like everyone else. My damned heart is telling an entirely different story. It’s insisting there is an explanation for her behavior. Am I going to apologize or not? The decision is taken out of my hands when Lexie opens her locker, and the little gift I left before class falls down. It’s a picture I cut out from our last yearbook. In the photo is a gorgeous smiling Lexie above the caption Most Likely to Succeed. Except I’ve crossed out the caption and added my own. Most Likely to Be a Trophy Wife. Watching her read it, I almost get sick right there in the hallway. Usually, she’s perfectly composed, not betraying a trace of emotion where I’m concerned—a real Ice queen. I’ve always thought she honestly didn’t care. Today, though… she’s not pulling it off. Something is not okay with her, and I don’t like it. She has to bite down on her bottom lip to stop it from quivering as she puts the photo back into her locker, out of sight, her bright eyes finding me briefly, massacring me where I stand. Betraying with one single look how much she has been affected by my actions. Christ. She hasn’t been indifferent at all.

Before I can react, before I can call her name, she’s gone, vanished into the crowd of wild students excited to be leaving for the day. And I know what I have to do. I have to see her. To apologize. To get an explanation for everything. Tonight. I’ll return to her house for the first time in two years.

LEXIE

I’ve known this was coming all day. Sitting on the couch in my living room, trying to make myself as small as possible, I watch my father pace. He rants, gesticulating noisily. This isn’t new, my father’s rage threatening me. But it’s going to be worse than usual. Business has declined for him and it’s put his temper on a trigger. Dad’s new wife, Nancy, hates to be on a budget, and she’s been spending his money like crazy all over Paris --where she’s now. When dad gets home from the office, he’s rarely in anything but a horrible mood. A tornado eating up everything in its path. Completely terrifying. At least dad’s temper makes me forget what Drake told me today, the ugly words he said to me, the boiling anger in his eyes when he looks at me.

“Are you even listening?” The slap across the face comes as a shock because I’d momentarily disappeared into my thoughts, but the sting quickly brings me back to reality.

“Yes, sir,” I say, my ears ringing. “I’m listening.”

“This C on your algebra test is going to drag your whole average down.” He’s waving the test in my face. “What a disappointment you are, Alexis. Your teacher shared my disgust.” I nod solemnly, but I’m listening for the rain outside. “I guess you’re your daughter’s mother after all. A poor Mexican girl who could barely count.” It’s not true. My mom learned English and Greek by herself, and she was a great Spanish teacher in Portavira, but my father would rather die than acknowledge how smart she was.

“Don’t talk like that about her,” I retort.

My father snorts. “I beg your pardon?” He takes a step towards me, and I can see the threat in his eyes.

“I’m sorry.” I hate to be such a coward, but I know what he can do to me.” I’ll do extra credit. Something to bring my grade back up to an A.” I wet my lips. “Even if I can’t manage to raise the grade, it’s not going to show up on the college transcripts I sent off with my applications.” That’s the reason I let my focus slip a little in algebra. The finish line is in sight for everyone, and we’re just waiting to find out where we’ll be accepted for college. It’s a wonder I’ve been able to maintain my focus this long in any class, considering Walker sits behind me in every period, brooding making me feel … something. At the reminder of him, I want to close my eyes and dream about him. I replay that night in my garden when he kissed me two years ago, so tenderly and passionately, when he spoke to me so sweetly and honestly before he became the second villain in my story. Someone I dread, as much as I crave the sight of him.

At least that’s one thing us poor motherfuckers have going for us. We know how to fuck. If you went out with that punk for a while, you’d eventually give in and come slumming it one night, wouldn’t you? Knock on my trailer door, begging me to ride you right.

Should I be ashamed of the way my body reacted to those words? I grew uncomfortably damp in the hard plastic chair, the center of my body clenching, seeming to beat like a heart. His breath on my neck made me shiver, head to toe. Even the way he scared off Liam Rys did something to me. Aroused me. Deeply. It got so bad that I broke the rules and asked him to stop. I can still hear him saying my name in that tortured way after. That shocked, uneven sound. Lexie. And whether I’m ashamed of myself for it or not, I know I’ll think of it when I touch myself tonight. His voice, his hands, his eyes obsess me.

“College?” My father snorts, tearing the test in half. “You’re not going to college.”

This grabs my attention. A horrible feeling is making me cold. “I’m…what? What do you mean? I applied to nine different schools. I have a four-point five GPA.”

For the first time, I notice his red face is about more than just rage. There’s…humiliation. I’ve never seen him display that emotion.

“None of the American colleges that accepted you offered scholarships.”

“I’ve been accepted?” I gasp, sitting forward, heart pounding in my chest. “Where? I didn’t see the letters—”

“All the mail in this house goes through me, Alexis. I read them. And you failed to get academic scholarships. You failed. Not that I’m surprised.”

I don’t point out that his refusal to let me participate in any extracurricular activities is more than likely to blame for that. I’m too worried about what he’s saying, what this means. The blood is draining from my head, making the room spin around me.

“Okay, I’m sorry about that. I’m sorry. But…we have money. We can pay tuition, can’t we? Or colleges in Cordonia are almost for free. I can go to any of them; I don’t have to go to NYU.” I have to get out of here. I have to get out of here. This is my way out. College is the escape route. I counted on going back to New York, but I can stay here and go to college in Cordonia City.

“Listen to you, so quick to spend my hard-earned money—spoiled brat. And of course, you can’t go to college in Cordonia. What for? To end up being a schoolteacher like your mom? A housewife as Nancy?” He laughs bitterly. “No, you’ll stay here, and I’ll help you find someone suitable to marry.”

I shake my head. “There’s financial aid, then. Loans or I can get a job and go to college in Portavira…”

“You want to leave, just like her, don’t you? You’re all the same.”

I don’t even flinch when he yanks me to my feet, shoving me into the wall. In fact, for the first time, I took him right into his eyes. And I can see the violence burning on them has nothing to do with me. It never had anything to do with how I behave, my choices, how hard I worked in school. How welcome I made Nancy feel or cooked a roast. It’s about him and his self-loathing. It’s his sickness. Not mine. I can also see that he was never going to send me to college. Because he wouldn’t be able to control me from a distance or stop me from sharing what I’ve been subjected to since my mother died. Not like he does now. He wasn’t physically abusive all the time. Especially not when his new wife is around. But she traveled often, and then he’d push me. Shove me. Slapped me several times. I’ll graduate at the top of my class for nothing. He knew I would all along.

That’s when I realize I’m free. I don’t have money, but college is free in Cordonia. I can work, save a little and go to college in one or two years. I’ll be a writer; it’ll just take more time than I thought. “Go to hell,” I whisper.

He steps back, giving me the momentary satisfaction of his shock. “What did you say?”

Liberated, I scream it this time. “Go to hell!” From the moment I sat down to have this conversation, I knew tonight would be worse than usual, but I’ve just bought myself a ticket to hell. Usually, I can retreat to the untouchable place inside of me as he unleashes his rage, but not tonight. He doesn’t stop at one or two slaps. He punches and kicks, and I’m present for every punch and kick. Every yelled insult. Finally, I start to get scared. I’m crawling across the carpet on my hands and knees, searching for a weapon I can use in my defense when I glance out the window and see Drake staring back at me, his face a mask of horror.

Drake

What I’m seeing just isn’t possible. It can’t be real. My head won’t accept it. Not until her terror-filled eyes meet mine through the window and the truth pounds on my chest, leaves no doubt that this is real life. Lexie’s father is beating her. Her mouth is bloody, one of her eyes beginning to swell, arms and legs visibly weakened. I can barely fucking process it before my body is springing into action, desperate to protect her. To put a stop to the worst thing I have ever seen. What the fuck. Scorching hot rage takes over. I kick in the front door and throw myself between Lexie and her father. His fist is raised, but it pauses when he sees me, his momentary confusion giving me the time I need to knock him out cold. It only takes one right uppercut from someone his own size, and he goes down, his blank, glassy eyes staring at nothing, mouth opened. It’s not satisfying enough.

Nothing will ever be satisfying enough. I want to kill him, destroy him, but my Lexie is struggling for breath behind me, and she’s all I can think about. Turning, I approach her, my heart threatening to jump off my chest. As gently as I can, I catalog all of the cuts and purpling skin. No. No. Who could do this to her? Who could lay a finger on her in anything but reverence? Get her out of here. Calling her name, I reach down to pick her up, but she flinches and hurries back, bringing her body up against the wall.

“Don’t touch me!” Those words filled with fear rip the soul clean out of my body. My hands drop limply to my sides and two years come rushing back, hitting me in the chest like a hammer. Every word, every action. Everything I did to make her life harder when this is what she’s been dealing with at home? Fuck me.

“Lexie…” My voice is as kind as I can. I feel broken. “I’m sorry. I came here to apologize. For everything.”

She puffs a humorless laugh, testing her cut lip with the tip of her tongue. “Bet you weren’t expecting to see this.”

“If I knew this was happening, I would have been here a long time ago. I would have stopped it. I swear Lex.”

Her expression can only be described as stunned. Maybe even a little pissed. “You are not my savior, Drake. You are my enemy. You’ve been for two years, and I want nothing else from you now.”

“I am not your enemy.” Those words barely make it out of me, my chest hurts so fucking bad. “Don’t say that.”

Unsteadily, she uses the wall to try and stand. I try to help her, but she recoils, and it’s a dagger straight into the center of my throat. Nothing less than I deserve, though, isn’t it? Her distrust of me is entirely my fault. I’ve made her hate me. There has to be some way to fix what I’ve done. Please God, let there be away. But right now, my main concern is her physical safety. Knowing she’s been in danger all along is unbearable. I only decided to come here tonight a few hours ago. What if I didn’t? What if I arrived an hour later? The possibilities are going to haunt me for the rest of my life. From the floor, her father groans, shifting slightly.

“We need to get you out of here,” I say, anxious to get her free of this place. “Now, Lexie. I need to get you somewhere safe.”

She’s standing now. Leaning against the wall and cradling one arm to her stomach, regarding me warily. “How do I know I’m safe with you?” It’s so much worse that her question is honest. Not meant to hurt me. She honestly doesn’t know if I pose a threat. It guts me where I stand.

“You are the safest with me,” I say thickly, cursing myself. Wanting to erase the last two years so badly, my hands shake. “Please believe me. I’d die before hurting you. I’d never, Lexie. I’d never do something like that.”

Her father rolls over onto his back and slurs a few words before losing consciousness again. Still, the sound of the older man’s voice seems to scare Lexie, “I…maybe you can just give me a ride to…a motel maybe?” She pushes off the wall, her step uneven as she walks toward the stairs. “I need some things from my room.”

It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell her we don’t have time, but I’m just grateful she’s trusting me enough to leave with me, so I don’t argue. I just wait until she’s halfway up the stairs, then tie her father’s hands behind his back with my belt in case he wakes up before we leave. I have no problem knocking him out a second time, but Lexie has seen enough violence for one night. Cautiously, I walk up the stairs toward the light coming from a room halfway down the hall. This place is a far cry from my home. It’s elegant and clean, and tasteful, but it lacks any warmth whatsoever. It’s cold, like a museum. Turning the corner into Lexie’s room, it’s time to hate myself all over again. There is nothing on the walls, none of the expensive furnishings. Just four white walls, a bed, and a dresser that doubles as a desk. Several textbooks. She looks back at me over her shoulder as if judging my reaction, and I keep my features impassive, though I’m dying on the inside.

“What can I do?” I ask.

“How long do we have?”

“As long as you need.” It’s physically painful not to pull her into my arms when I’m standing this close, and she’s hurt. Sad. Yet full of more inner strength than I’ve ever witnessed in another human being. I’m lucky just to be in her presence. I fucked up royally. And if she allows me back in, I’ll never do it again. It’s probably, definitely, too much to hope for. Being allowed back in. She doesn’t even look sure about having me in her room. Let alone her heart. I was trying to protect my own heart, but I lost it instead.

“Um…” She closes her eyes to focus, a familiar trait I’ve seen in class countless times. “There is a black bag in the hallway closet. Can you just stuff anything into it from the bathroom that looks useful?”

Ask me to bring you a unicorn. I’ll find a way to do it. “Sure.” We work in silence, Lexie taking things out of drawers and adding them to the bag, which I’ve left open on the floor. I add toiletries from the bathroom, and once it’s zipped, I wait, watching her hesitate in the doorway.

“Lexie?” Conflicted chocolate eyes meet mine.

“I can’t just leave, can I?”

“You’re not safe here, baby,” I say softly, trying to keep the residual rage at bay because it’s the last thing she needs. Not to mention she’s had her fill with negativity from me. No more. “How long…how long?”

She shrugs, the saddest expression in her eyes. “My mom died five years ago. Ever since then, it’s gotten worse and worse. Although I never had a chance to talk to anyone about what happened behind closed doors, you know? I don’t think a person can evolve into a monster. It’s inside him.”

“I don’t know,” I say. “I became one, didn’t I?”

That gives her pause, forms a line between her delicate brows. “Yeah. I guess you’re right.”

She starts to walk past me, stops, standing close enough to fill my nose with cherry. “He told me if I ever spoke to you ever again, he would hurt me. Ruin you, have you evicted. Make sure you never got hired again. I didn’t mean to…hurt you. Or hurt your feelings, if that’s what happened.”

That revelation destroys me, sets me on fire. “Jesus, Lexie. You were protecting me? And I…I tortured you for it?” I twist the neck of my T-shirt, trying to calm down, but it doesn’t work. I’ll never be calm again “I’m so fucking sorry.”

She glances at the doorway, then back at me, eyes closed again in that way that says she’s thinking. “All I want from you now is a ride out of here, okay? And on Monday morning, you’ll stop.” She opens her shining eyes again. “No more bullying, Drake. If you’re really sorry, you’ll do that for me.”

Fuck. I couldn’t say one more single shitty thing to her if my life depended on it. Put me at gunpoint, and I’d rather get shot at than torture this girl for one more second. But I’m highly, painfully aware that with an end to the bullying comes an end to the possessiveness. No more scaring off guys who show interest in her. No more getting close enough in class to count the hairs on her head, to smell her sweet fragrance. And to tell the truth, I’m pretty fucking worried I don’t know how to give those things up completely. I don’t think I can physically do it. This addiction with Lexie isn’t something I can cut off. A leg would be easier to sever. But my hesitation is causing her eyes to worry. If I don’t agree to, essentially, let her go… she’s not going anywhere with me. And that means her safety won’t be guaranteed. I need it to be. More than anything.

“No more bullying,” I say, finally. A moment later, I follow her out of the room and down the stairs, trying desperately to count the hairs on her head before I no longer have the chance.

#tw domestic violence #toxic relationship #tw bullying

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paper-n-ashes · 4 years ago

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sparks and embers - chapter 1

Characters: Poe Dameron x Original Female Character, Kylo Ren x Original Female Character

Story Tags: Explicit (18+), Canon Compliant/Divergent (Set after TLJ), First Person POV, Love Triangle, Slow Burn, Enemies to Lovers, Porn with Plot, Hurt/Comfort, Kylo Ren hates Poe Dameron

Summary: Alexys is a doctor living a life of exclusivity on Raxus, hoping to survive through a peaceful existence, concealing herself from those she believes would use her, or kill her. When fate intervenes and instigates a perilous journey she'd been desperately trying to avoid, Alex finds herself caught in the middle of two sides in both war and love.

Preface: Let me say, I am immensely nervous about this. After months of back and forth inside my mind, I’ve decided to go for it and begin the long process of moving my long running series to Tumblr, along with changing the name (something I’ve wanted to do for a long time). I hit a big emotional road block after over a year of writing and posting, so I’m hoping this move will eventually get me back into the swing. But for now, I’m looking forward to revisiting the beginning of this space love triangle.

If you’ve already read the saga, absolutely NO pressure to read again. Each chapter will be edited a little, but no major plot points will change. To any newcomers who find themselves interested, the story is already posted on AO3 if you are desperate to continue. Otherwise if you prefer reading on Tumblr, or simply like the forced breaks between chapters, I’ll be posting a new chapter every couple of days. I know it’s not written as reader insert, but I just couldn’t make the story work out in any other fashion. I poured a lot of love and heart into Alexys so I hope you’ll give her a chance.

Chapter 1 - Crash Landing

Words: 3.4k

Chapter Tags/Warnings: descriptions of severe injury including blood and bone, medical procedures

Read on AO3

I felt it before I heard it.

A booming crash of metal and glass, sending a shattering vibration through the walls and furniture around me. After the years of mostly silence I’d become accustomed to, the noise that came pummelling into my ears almost made me shriek in surprise. It was short lived, coming and going in a flicker so quick I had to wonder if it was real at all.

Lights began to flash, blinking rapidly in uneven time. The mixture of harsh beeps indicated something was faulting my electricity circuits, plunging me into the darkness of night over and over.

I could only question myself again at the plausibility of this being a dream, but the slow, increasing creak emanating from beyond the walls of this building brought me to a certainty.

Something had crashed outside.

Fear radiated through my limbs, leaving me stuck where I was standing for a few moments, before an uncontrollable urge of selflessness and honestly, curiosity, forced me to move and exit the safety of my clinic.

There wasn’t really a way to prepare for what I saw not metres away from my front entrance. A ship, an X-wing of some variety, was wrecked into itself, varying metals twisted and curled over each other, flames beginning to billow out from the creases. I could feel the heat of them rise as I cautiously stepped forward, taking in the scene with wide eyes. Only seconds had passed when I saw it – the movement of something – no, a person, demanding my attention. The pilot of this battered machine had been thrown just beyond the edge of its hull, broken transparisteel smattering the ground around them.

Hm, the Resistance should probably investigate their flight safety measures.

That thought quickly flittered away when the pilot moved again, this time with a painful moan echoing into the atmosphere. The switch inside quickly flipped, and an all too familiar feeling of conviction flooded through.

This is your cue Alexys.

I raced quickly to the pilot and knelt on the ground before them, fingers carefully removing the black and red helmet with both urgency and restraint as to not cause any more possible damage to their head or neck. The moan I'd heard just moments before let me know this person had some kind of airway, but it was pertinent I assess further. With the helmet gone I noticed the short, lightly waved black hair of a man, his eyes pulled closed, a few bruises and smudges of grey soot smattered over his face. His chest was moving, laboured breathing with the occasional heave on inhale.

At least he’s breathing.

“It’s alright,” I insisted. “I’m here to help you.”

There wasn’t any discernible response from the pilot other than a groan that withered away slowly, and that in itself was worrying. Kneeling over his body, I placed two fingers under the line of his jaw, halfway down, trying to feel for a pulse. I could sense the thump of blood under my fingertips, but it was too slow, too faint, too uneven.

Not great, but it was enough for now.

I began to scan over his body, knowing it was time to assess what was giving him reason to cry out in pain. There were severe burns on his left arm which had caused some of his flight suit to stick to the skin, with more scalds reaching down to his torso and abdomen. His right arm was almost definitely broken with the limb morphed into an irregular angle almost halfway along.

Without being able to look at them directly to ascertain whether I was going to be able to move him, I pressed on his hips gently, silently praying he hadn’t broken his pelvis. He muffled softly, but anyone who had actually shattered the bone would have screamed. As my eyes continued to scan down, it became obvious all too suddenly the shattered edge of his right femur bone poking out of the orange flight suit.

Kriff, this is not ideal.

I wanted to kick myself for not noticing it before, but there was no time, not with the very real possibility of him bleeding out in front of my eyes. My feet moved under me, racing back to the clinic room, knowing where the bandage and splint lay waiting, along with the anaesthetic injections I had stocked in the pharmacy cupboard.

He was certainly going to need them.

Within minutes I was back to the ground with the pilot, clicking together the injector handle and vial, piercing the needle straight into his thigh above the fracture site. I wouldn’t be able to wait for it to dull most of the pain, so internally, I braced myself for the scream I was about to elicit from this poor human's chest. The second I started to wrap the bandage around the splint, a piercing wail echoed through the air, almost causing me to hesitate. Still, my hands continued to haphazardly wrap the white material around his leg, pushing through the guilt it ignited.

Suddenly, the noise stopped.

My eyes darted to his face as his head slumped over on its side. “Hey!” I shouted into his face as I scrambled back to the top end of his limp body. “Hey can you hear me? Open your eyes if you can hear me!”

There was no response.

I pinched at the muscle on his shoulder, harder and harder to elicit any kind of reaction. Nothing. My hand pulled into a closed fist and grinded against his sternum. “Come on, open those eyes if you can feel this!”

Still nothing.

Again I took check of his breathing, chest still rising and falling, yet shallow and with little power. His heartbeat had begun to race, but through my fingertips I could feel the strain in the muscle. Something was seriously wrong, even more so than his other injuries. Something internally. If I didn’t get him into the clinic, he was going to die.

In a snap decision, I chose to forgo an attempt to run back and locate the hover-stretcher. It would take too much time to set up and power on, time this man didn’t have. I would have to move him myself.

How the hell am I going to do this?

With my arms hooked and locked under his armpits I began to drag the pilots hefty body backwards towards the clinic behind me, thankfully only a few meters away, barely making it past the entryway when a roar of flames overtook the X-wing. I looked up to see the blaze almost completely engulfing the ship, a ferocious heat searing into my eyes and face. With even more urgency I heaved the body into the large clinic room, getting up and slamming the door just in time. Just before a house rattling explosion sent shockwaves into the atmosphere.

Lucky didn’t seem to be an appropriate feeling considering the situation I was in, but at least no one had died. Yet. With my last bit of brute strength, I hoisted the pilots limp body onto the closest hospital bed, noticing then the trail of red liquid I’d brought along with me.

Oh no no no.

With him still lifeless, I tugged at his body and limbs to lie flat on the bed, scurrying to my medical trolley and hauling it back to where the pilot laid, ragged breaths still thankfully escaping into the air. Snatching the heavy shears from the top drawer, I began to tear through the thick fabric of the flight suit, unclipping and removing as much of the life support vest and belt as I could. I had to be careful not to rip away the fabric that melted into the burns scattered all over his body, the number of them increasing as I peeled away the suit, starting from his legs, up to his abdomen and chest over to his upper arms. His torso was in full view now, a smattering of dark hair over his pectorals, underneath which showed the bruises of his crash’s impact.

Oh he’s definitely got some broken ribs.

As my gaze scanned over his skin, I could finally isolate where all that blood had escaped from. A deep penetrating wound just below the last rib on his left flank. As I registered his quick shallow breaths and the uneven rise in his chest, it became obvious.

Collapsed lung.

Whatever had pierced through his chest had poked an extremely damaging hole in his lung, the pleural space now filling with air, leaving no room for his lung to expand. My following movements were swift and calculated, almost automatic. A pointed scalpel was soon in my hand, poised to cut. But I couldn’t help but hesitate. It had been so long since I’d had to do this. And yet, somehow, concern for this stranger’s life was quick to weave it’s way through, dissolving my fear into pure resolve.

I made my incision in between the 4th and 5th ribs, using a clamp to push into the underlying tissue and past the pleural cavity, a gloved hand then entering to check I’d made it through. With an instinctive confidence, I guided the chest tube between the layers of tissue, undoing the ratchet of the clamp to an immediate rush of air. The pilot’s chest heaved in relief, along with my own.

One crisis averted.

But there was more to do. Connecting a drain to the tube, I haphazardly sutured it in place, before flying to the pharmacy cupboard. My stock of bacta was limited, returning with an already prepared vial into the pressurised injector, reminding myself I would need to use it sparingly if this stranger was going to make it through the full extend of his injuries. I had cursed at myself only a few times in the years past at being so far removed from a higher level medical centre that would be overflowing with bacta and medical droids that could help in exactly this kind of situation, but the thought had never burned me so badly. There was no way to know if I could keep this man alive with the resources that yesterday I had been more than comfortable with. I would just have to try.

I injected some of the bacta solution throughout the surrounding area of the wound and covered it with heavy dressing, knowing the bleeding would quickly be curbed. Unfortunately, the wound itself would take a few days to fully close, only ever being able to afford lower quality bacta. Before moving on to the burns, I placed some basic monitoring, lines extending from electrical dots over his chest, wrist and neck to the data monitor above the bed. As the numbers lit up on the holo screen, I felt myself breathe a small sigh of relief, having prepared for a much worse result. His heart rate was better, oxygen levels returning to normal, blood pressure not optimal by any means but high enough to sustain his life, for now.

After securing an oxygen filter over his battered face, I continued to inspect and clean as many of the small and more sizeable burns dotting his body. Even with the many I had uncovered, the one extending from his shoulder past his elbow was the one of most concern. Third degree and extremely unhappy looking. If I wasn’t quick to treat this, it could leak even more fluid from his already compromised circulatory system. I was thankful he still remained unconscious when I began to slowly shed the charred material melted into the skin layer. I couldn’t help but shudder as I remembered the initial scream this man had let out, knowing I would be hearing it now if not for his comatose state.

Covering the immense scald in as much salve as I could spare, I began to wrap it in protective antibacterial bandage, soon moving on to protect his many blisters and deeper burns with dressings. Glancing at the monitor screen, he was still stable, and swallowed hard. Now it was time to attempt possibly the most daunting part of this patient’s treatment.

His femur was still sticking through the tissue of his thigh, slightly dried dark red blood creating lightning strike looking lines extending from the wound.

I need to get some blood into him before moving this.

I quickly got to work on an IV cannula, his poor blood pressure making it significantly more difficult than it should have been. Two bags of O- blood were all I had, and a wave of dread coursed through me with the thought of that not being enough if this all went wrong. My fist squeezed the fast flow pump of the IV line, pushing fresh blood urgently into his system, making his blood pressure rise only slightly. With the last of the red liquid trickling through the line I wheeled over the portable X-Ray. It was so old the mechanical arm screeched at me as I positioned it into place over the pilot’s leg. The bone had to be at least somewhat in place before getting the bacta to work its magic or this guy might walk with two uneven legs for the rest of his life.

If he actually made it through the rest of his injuries, that is.

Shaking my arms out at my side, I sucked in a few deep breaths to build my stamina. Unfortunately, this stranger was stuck with a small framed female to attempt reducing his severe fracture. With one last inhale, I drew the courage to pull as hard as I could horizontally at the knee joint, digging my fingers into a vice grip around the limb and yanking it towards me. To my relief, the fractured edge of the femur to slipped back into the hole it was peeking out from, settling back under the skin.

Thank all the stars in the galaxy he’s not awake for this.

I quickly pressed the image button on the X-ray to assess the progress I’d made. The faint white lines of bone edges were stark enough on the grey background of the image. The fracture wasn’t reduced even nearly enough. I prepared myself again, with another deep breath I pulled hard. This time my efforts were forced into angling the lower portion of bone to try and lock it back into place. The grinding of bone edges could be felt through my fingers, pushing myself to pull even harder, creating more space between the fracture in the hope of giving a fighting chance of lining up the splintered edges. My muscles were whining, begging for this to be over, tears of exhaustion soon stinging at the edges of my eyes.

With one final twisting motion there was a sudden click.

Finally.

My relief was short lived.

It was slow at first, before racing faster. A stream of dark red blood pooling at the wound the broken bone had made.

Oh maker no.

Within moments the pace of the blood quickened. I shot my hands to the open flesh site, pressing down hard in an attempt to disturb the flow. The liquid quickly covered my gloved hands, already sure I’d sliced into the femoral artery. The pressure of my hands into the area made the blood spurt out onto my arms, my clothes, my face, everywhere. The monitor was screaming, blood pressure falling quickly. Wiping some of the hot coppery fluid away from my left eye, I slid my fingers back into the gash, moving desperately to stop the overflow before the man lying in front of me bled out, knowing it would all be my fault.

You have to do it Alexys. He will die if you don’t.

The voice nagged at me, pleading to do what it wanted.

He’s with the Resistance! If he survives, if he contacts them, they’ll find me. And they’ll know.

It is time to decide. His life. Or yours.

Seconds ticked by fleetingly, numbers flashing on the monitor trickling down, the speed of blood flow from the pilot’s leg stubbornly keeping it’s intensity.

Everything I’d done to get here, to isolate myself so no one could find me. It would all amount to nothing. My easy, albeit lonely life, would be gone. All because of this stranger.

But I couldn’t let him die. Not like this.

In one flash, I removed my hands from inside the wound, ripping off my gloves and placing two palms at either side of the leg. With closed eyes, I willed the energy out of the depths of its slumber. From the darkened corner of my mind I pulled it back into existence, opening the gate I’d locked it inside for so long, letting it finally burst through and fill up my brain. From there it down through my neck, through my chest and down my arms, right to the end of my fingertips. Its warming glow was almost comforting, friendly. I would have basked in it for a while if not for the life that hung in the balance before me.

Through the pads of my fingerprints I pushed the stream outwards, connecting past the skin of this innocent human being, and felt the overwhelming heat of pain and dimming of energy.

Hurry, he’s dying.

I began to map out the tissue of his leg, frustratingly slowly, starting at the smallest of capillaries, weaving and winding through the flesh, connecting them through the maze of fat and muscle. I could feel the sweat forming on my forehead, my breathing forced and harsh. The vessels grew bigger as I pushed the energy through, skipping past broken points of other smaller injuries. I could fix them later.

Finally, I felt a molten warmth radiating close to where the maze had guided me. Racing to it, I sensed something pushing me back, the pressure of escaping fluid holding my efforts. I’d found the cut, but now I had to somehow knit it back together.

You’re taking too long.

The alarms of the monitor started to echo with a hollow ring inside my ear, fading until I could hear almost nothing. The world around me was blurry, only the image of vessel tissue and all-consuming redness visible in my minds eye. The energy I was expending began to burn me - I wouldn’t be able to keep this up for much longer. I reached out with it, what felt like many hands grasping desperately at the severed edge of the vessel, frantic yet delicate, pulling whatever tissue I could hold back into place.

Several fringes connected, the pressure pushing forcefully against me, making it harder to hold. I couldn’t help but begin to shake at the strain, the sound of my own heart pounding over the slowing heartbeat of the pilot. My grip was already beginning to fade before I started to sew the pieces of artery back together, an ache growing behind my eyes as I pierced an invisible needle through the tissue, over and over, still clawing at the unsewn edges as I made my way around the tube.

I was so close, the tension of the fluid still being driven out of the broken seal almost overcoming me. The unseen thread had almost made its way full circle. I was almost there.

My entire body rattled with exhaustion and pain. One final thread wove itself around the artery, its abrupt closure alleviating the strain on invisible fingers that had been clutching it all together.

You did it.

The energy dissipated quickly in a rolling wave, letting it retreat back into my mind, scampering to the secluded area of my brain, hidden once more. I felt light suddenly, dizzy, the world coming back into focus, screaming alarms growing louder. It was too much, all at once.

A sharp pang of fatigue enveloped every part of my senses and I faltered back, knees giving way, slumping to the floor.

Then, there was only darkness.

Next Chapter

Tag list: @tlcwrites @roanniom @foxilayde @blackberries45 @hopeamarsu @caillea @princessxkenobi @direnightshade @mariesackler @leatherboundbirate @blowthatpieceofjunk @mylifeisactuallyamess @poedameronloverx @millenialcatlady @jynz-andtonic @lightsinthedistancee @star-killer-md @morby @modernpaw @cornmousequeen @paterson-blue

Just let me know if you would like to be removed or added, no judgement!

#poe dameron #poe dameron x original female character #kylo ren #kylo ren x original female character #star wars #star wars fanfiction #adcu #adcu fanfiction

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shadowdianne · 3 years ago

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Fic writer review [Or a fic writer tag game if you prefer]

I was tagged by @naralanis and I can already see her grin all the way from where I am xd Thank you, dear, for the tag, let’s see what are my answers, shall we.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

*bursts out laughing* Adding both pseuds I have… 535 according to the account info but by counting them all I’m reaching 541 so I’m guessing it’s counting some drafts I need to re-find.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

I seriously hated you for this one xd I was going to do it by hand by I decided one-third there that I value my mental stability a little bit more xd according to the stats page back at a03 that number would be 1257884. It may be wrong. I think there should be a few more numbers up there but the majority of my works are one-shots so *shrugs* There’s also the fact that counting my ao3 things only is shaving off like half of it Xd Anyway, can we laugh at the fact that I’m a pain in the ass and that I’ve written a lot? More than I should have, that’s for sure

3. How many fandoms have you written for?

Trick question because I haven’t crossposted everything I wrote back in ffnet and I actually erased some fics from my account back there so the numbers are a little blurry there.

When I had the entirety of my work posted both in ffnet and a03 I had written for: Twilight (Bella/Alice) Glee (Faberry and there were a couple Pezberry and I don’t fucking remember the pairing name for Santana and Quinn), Harry Potter (Hermione/Ginny, Hermione/Narcissa, Hermione/Bellatrix) OUAT (SwanQueen and several oneshots focusing on the mad hatter and the blue fairy solely back at ffnet that were written in Spanish and never translated), I actually had a veeeery old au prompt of Frozen (Elsanna in where I wrote them as non sibilings), Rizzoli and Isles (Rizzles), Dishonored 2 (Emily Kaldwin/Alexi Mayhew), Lara Croft and Wonder Woman, Supergirl (SuperCorp/Supercat) I had a 100 one -or maybe two??- (Clexa), The Shannara Chronicles (Amberle/Eretreia [Or Princess Rover], Rwby [Blake Belladona/Yang], The Worst Witch (Hecate Hardbroom and Pippa Pentangle), The Half of it, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (Madam Satan/Zelda Spellman) and… I think that’s it(?) I may be forgetting some but probably nothing important if I’m not remembering it lol.

4. Top 5 fics by kudos?

Ah, we are going to go there, uh? Xd My works are not the kudos and comment getting type Xd So I was quite surprised when I went to check this.

1: Cracked it I wrote this one back in 2017, it was a prompt done by an anon: Lena is nerding with one of her projects at home, mumbling mostly to herself because she’s stuck and Kara casually mentions how to solve the problem like it’s nothing. I really had some fun with this. It was back when some us, SQeeners were fully doing the jump between OUAT and SuperGirl (I mean, there had already been some crossover as for fandom is related but this when the girls were actually getting their conjoined voice within the fandom)

2: Dateless I honestly needed to check what this one was about but I think I can see why this one shot has the amount of kudos it has. It’s a short and sweet idea and responds to the Teachers Au that went SO well with SQ. Everyone thinks they hate each other and try to set them up with other people whilst they, in truth, are dating. I don’t remember if I wrote them as married rather than dating but despite being from 2017 as well is one cheeky enough to be cool Xd I probably would edit some lines now *shudders*

3: After you I truly didn’t expect this one to be top 3. Makes me think of a lot of things, if I’m being honest Xd. After you was a one shot written almost feverishly as an answer to the fabulous drawings that Sejic did of both Lara Croft and Wonder Woman back at 2018 or something. It’s just Lara and Diana being himbos but not at all with each other.

4: How about… How about is one I remember perfectly, it was my answer to the ending of the Half of it film. I had SOME thoughts about it, let’s just stop there Xd I really liked the film itself but I think and I thought at the time that my response to wishing for a final scene at the very end of the credits responds to me being in a different personal moment than the characters. I really wanted to explore my feelings about it and so I wrote about them finding each other again after some time passes. It was also something I wrote after quite the hiatus so I took it as something I could write about without focusing too much on the why.

5: Come to me

Ahh, SuperCorp Xd I remember this one actually. A friend of mine and I were talking about descriptions, and she mentioned quite off-handedly how she wanted a fic in where Kara’s back was described. I complied… more or less.

Fun tidbit, despite the big volume of my work is obviously set in ouat there’s only 1 SQ fic there as you can see, the others are either SuperCorp or the random one shots I created for Wonderwoman/Lara Croft and The half of it. *sighs in deep thought* I’m also not going to look too much into how almost all of the fics were posted and written back in 2017. Nope, not at all.

*Small voice screaming you peaked in 2017 and everything else is garbage jumps back and forth*

5. Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?

I tend to always respond, yup. I truly value comments. I might have gone for spells of time in where I didn’t have the mental capacity to check in old fics because I truly didn’t know what to answer but I treasure every single comment and you all who comment know that I can start to ramble in the answers xd -sorry about that- I really really REALLY love interaction.

6. A fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending:

Ok, Nara, come on, this one is a catch for me. I’ve written angst in far too many fics to remember the angstiest one :P I have the most recent one, though, that is the easy one to think about: Goodbye.Written for @delirious-comfort. I’m just going to say “Kisses with their last dying breath” as an idea of what awaits inside but I’ve written about death and loss and angst quite a lot. There were some I wrote back to SQ with Regina needing to kill Emma during the Dark Swan arc that, to this day, I still love and some others in where Regina is the one that dies, again and again, trapped by magic while Emma watches. I have the loss in mental destruction form and… I REALLY like my angst y’know xd

7. Do you write crossovers?

Not counting Lara and Wonder Woman not really! I think it comes from the fact that I loooove worldbuilding as a whole and some pairings would require all my focus into making the world perfect which in turn would make me self conscious on the OOCness of it all.

8. Ever received hate on a fic?

*snorts* I’ve received hate due to the pairing I’ve written about, how I’ve written about it, the amount I’ve written, how slow or quick I can be, the usage of some tropes, the lack of usage of those same tropes… Let’s just go with: yuuuup.

9. Do you write smut?

I’ve written smut, yeah! But I can already see the pointed looks of some so let’s elaborate Xd I write smut when asked and sometimes when not asked but there’s a part of me I like to call a terrible tease that prefers writing the beginning of a scene, taunt it, focus on what happens before the sex scene per se as I find it more enjoyable to write. The process of escalation is always the best for me to see what can I do it by using both dialogue and descriptors tbh, so I tend to tease more than show.

9. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

A few weeks ago I’d have said: Maybe(?) But trying to follow the trail of some other fics that had been stolen from some friends -I think it was me trying to find more about the page that stole something from your Nara!- I found some pages in where my fics had been reposted. In some it was stated that the person posting the fic wasn’t the author but I had never been contacted in order to see if I’d say yes to such a thing and in some others the page was locked up but I could still see someone was pretending to be the author. I did the thing and got some of those down.

Pointed note: Ask me if you want to post or translate or anything. I will look into you and answer you if you seem honest about the thing. But despite every joke and self-deprecating comment those 500 and then some fics represent MY time so very kindly I say fuck off to those who wish to steal from me and if I catch you… you don’t really want to see me angry, trust me.

10. Ever had a fic translated?

I’ve given permission to some, yeah, but never heard it back from them so I’m guessing it didn’t stick.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic?

I’ve written series alongside other authors as @stregaomega for example. And some others that are unpublished -looking at you @carsonnieve - I’ve also done collabs… but fics co-written in the sense of two authors same chapters I don’t have anything posted I’m afraid :P

13. All-time favourite ship?

*snorts*, I guess the obvious answer is SQ uh? And I do think they were the ones that allowed me to read and write SO much. The one I feel more strongly about, however, is Bering and Wells from Warehouse 13.

14. WIP you want to finish, but don’t think you ever will?

All of them counts as a valid answer? But if I only could finish one that would be Arcadia. With A forgotten Promise second and the one I did as an Assassins Creed AU third. (I don’t remember the name so there’s no link, sorry xd)

15. Writing strengths?

Uhhhh, you REALLY want me to say that? I don’t fucking know!! To me everything I write is garbage. I always try to go for the feelings so I guess. Dunno xd I’ve been told I’m good at worldbuilding and to be honest is what I enjoy the most.

16. Writing weaknesses?

Everything Xd Pacing? What I hate the most sometimes is dialogue, I would count it as a weakness but I’m always far too focused on description rather than dialogue. I don’t think it’s a bad thing per se but it’s something that I don’t do as much.

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

I’m conflicted. Always. Majorly because I think that having bilingual characters in fanfiction is portrayed and expected in a way that I don’t feel it’s honest with how bilingual people -us- talk. So if I go by what I know I do I think it’s not what readers hope to see when it comes to that and if I go for how canonically is hoped to be found I don’t think it’s logical. But that’s me and my overthinking Xd If I have the option I like to do it.

18. First fandom you ever wrote for?

Belice! Or Bella/Alice. Worst first fic ever but oh, well, I’m always saying that :P

19. What’s your fav fic you’ve written so far?

Uhh… Don’t make me do this XD Agh, I don’t know. I’ve always been very vocal about Metallic Ink because I let myself enjoy the process of creating a magic system almost out of zero and that was fun. Despite hating some of the writing process and that I’d do it differently now I think I’m going to stick with that answer. Or anything that had any steampunk-based undertone. To be honest I like more thinking of concepts, I had one in where Emma was a thief and it involved the robbery of a ring that was Regina’s one way ticket to freedom I then later repurposed that I adored thinking about so let’s go with…. Yeah, I love having the option of changing things up a little and focus on how characters would fit in different aesthetics for this one Xd

Annnd… these are four pages, gods. I’m just going to tag @waknatious @carsonnieve @stregaomega here and see what they do- Enjoy the questionnaire ladies :P

#taggie thingie #this was a monster

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just-the-hiddles · 4 years ago

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Tumblr Tuesday | Summaries

So as you probably know (or not, it’s cool either way!) I read a fair amount of fic during the weeks for my weekly rec list. And I am shocked with the number of fics I saw scrolling through the tags without a summary! This was me:

Which prompted this week’s tip. Why you should have summaries and tips on writing them.

Why You Should Include Summaries on All Your Stories and Chapters

1. Many people don’t read stories without summaries. This includes me. I do not read stories without summaries. I like knowing a little bit about the story before I start reading. I am not big into surprises. Oh, is it fluff, is it angst?

2. Trigger warnings may not be enough. You may think “oh well I trigger warned I have done enough.” No, sweetie. I am fortunate to at the point in time not having any triggers, but I have squicks and my mood changes. I may not want to read a particular kind of story. Your summary gives me clues on what may be in there.

3. It is the perfect way.to entice people to read. A good summary can make or break whether someone reads your story or not. The fic market is saturated, you want to be read. A summary is a perfect way to do it.

Things to Include in a Summary

- The main characters in the story. If your story has a ship or multiple ships, those characters should be mentioned in your story. You don’t have to say about all the relationship but the main characters should be mentioned.

-The setting or AU premise. Does your story take place in London, the past, alternate universe. Is your character not in his or hers normal profession/role? Such as a CEO, mobster, single parent, a parent, professor, etc.

-The main conflict of your story. What is driving your story? What is the conflict? What is your main character trying to accomplish (or not accomplish)? You should let the readers know what the main point of your story.

Things Not to Include in a Summary

- Major spoilers. If you have a big reveal in your story, such as a death, a marriage, etc. Don’t put that in your summary, save it for the story.

- The ending. Don’t give the whole thing away!

- Anything that might be trigger someone. Don’t go putting explicit stuff in there. Don’t go into graphic detail. Keep it light and breezy (or dark and stormy).

Summary Writing Tips

1. Don’t just cut and paste a portion of your story as your summary. I know this can be a tempting and popular choice for a summary but in my opinion, that rarely gives me a proper overview of the story. Which is the whole purpose of the summary. If you want to include an actual potion of your story, I would do it in addition to a summary.

2. Summaries can be a single sentence or a longer paragraph depending on the story. A summary is a brief statement of the main points of your story. I find series need a longer summary than drabbles or one shots.

Examples of short summaries:

Reader gives Loki his first blow job.

Steve Rogers takes the reader out of their first date. Things don’t go as planned.

Tony is caught cheating and must deal with the fallout.

Example of long summaries:

When Loki goes to ask his father for permission to marry, he is shocked to discover his destiny has already been made for him. He is already betrothed to Sjofn, the daughter of the King of Vanaheim. An arranged marriage to bring the two kingdoms closer together and strengthen the bond. Never mind that Sjofn and Loki can’t stand each other.

After The Battle of New York, Loki is sent to live at Avengers Tower as punishment for his misdeeds. But it doesn’t mean he has to like it. A year later, he has adjusted to life on Midgard but has avoided any romantic or emotional entanglements, still bitter over his lost love. Dr. Alexis Randall is skilled at helping others fix their relationships as a couple therapist, but can’t help her own love life. A chance encounter with Loki in a dive bar has life altering consequences for both of them. Now, Alexis and Loki must figure out a way to co-habit without killing each other in the process, plus navigating impending parenthood and other roadblocks along the way.

Five years ago, Emma Masters just landed her first big acting gig on a soap opera. While it is not much, it is an opportunity to grow. While out celebrating, she meets up with a fellow actor, Tom Hiddleston. While she doesn’t recognize any of his work, the two hit it off. Before they know, they are getting hot and heavy in the elevator up to Tom’s room. Like ships passing in the night, the two never manage to meet again.

Now five years later, Emma is a heavy hitter in the prime time drama world and Tom is a Golden Globe winning movie star. Their paths cross again but things have changed. Will they do what they should or fall to their deepest desires?

3. Read the back of books you enjoy for ideas of good summaries. Or another fun resource is Query Shark.

So your summary is basically the back of the book for your story. Read those summaries to get an idea of good ones and bad ones. Query Shark is a literary agent who helps writers improve their query letters by critiquing them. A huge part of query letters is a summary of the story.

4. Write a summary like a movie trailer.

Another fun exercise is to write your like a movie trailer would read. You know the bit “In a world...” or “Meet...”. Have some fun with it. Try different things! Be silly. Be serious, have some fun!

Please please write a summary to your story. It is your best bit of advertising your story. It is your first impression, the handshake. Make it count. I know summaries suck to write. I know they are hard. But they are really important.

#tumblr tuesday #tip tuesday #fanfic writing #fanfiction writing #fanfiction writing tips #fanfic writing advice #fanfic writing tips #fanfiction writing advice #summary writing #write summaries for your stories

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favoriteliar-archive · 4 years ago

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Gif Maker Appreciation Tag

rules: answer the first half of the questions with gifsets of your own, then answer the second half by tagging gif makers you love!

tagged by @iridescentides @miriammaisel @molinareggie ty loves!

LINK A GIFSET...

Link a gifset you’re really proud of:

reggie + flower symbolism . it took me a bit to research and pick out the flowers but i think it really paid off! i love the way it looks and i should do more things like it i think

Link a gifset where you tried something new:

luke patterson + quotes . i just love having little doodles next to lettering when i do them in my sketchbook so i thought it would be cool to have a gif version of that! so thats what i did!

Link a gifset that features your favorite character or celebrity:

charlie gillespie edit! i’m really proud of how this came out tbh! i like the vibrancy of the colors and the b&w contrast next to it. plus i really like doing shaped gifs? idk i just think it turned out nice

Link a gifset that you want more people to see:

my julie molina pink + purple gifset. i worked on this for a while trying to get the colors right and it took me forever to find a typography set that i liked. i just really love the way it looks

Link a gifset that you had fun making:

jatp 5 songs ! i actually really love drawing/writing lettering and i think it always looks cool to digitalize it! so i did that here and tried to convey the energy of the song with the typography and i think it worked? idk to me i think they match well

Link a gifset that you created as part of a meme, challenge, or series:

jatp women - julie/flynn gifset! i think this might honestly be one of my best gifsets. the colors are nice, the text is pretty, and i just love everything about it. i def want to make more gifs like this in the future

Link a gifset of yours that makes you smile:

nick anderson + being confused. a simple edit, but i just think his facial expressions are so funny lmao

Link a gifset that you made for someone else:

my wonder woman gifset i made for @owenjoyner ! im still super proud of this set and i think it turned out really well :’)

TAG SOMEONE WHO...

Tag someone who inspired you to start making gifs:

@laufeysons daphne was one of the first people i followed here and i remember seeing her gifs and telling myself “i wanna do that one day” and now look at me!!! i’m doing it, ma, i’m doing it!

Tag someone who makes great vibrant gifs:

@iridescentides and @dani-clayton both make such amazing and vibrant gifs! vibrancy is something i can be very scared of so i’m always in awe when these two pull it off so beautifully!

Tag someone who makes great pale/pastel gifs:

@molinareggie alexis uses pale colors for her color palette gifsets and they still manage to turn out bright? like its not washed out or anything, its a nice pastel-y feel to the whole sets.

Tag someone who gifs for a fandom you love:

@alinastarksov valentina makes some of the best jatp edits out there tbh. the coloring is always so nice and the mix of serious + funny gifsets is amazing.

Tag someone who uses text/typography really well in their gifsets:

@andstitch uses text very well!! not only is everything easily legible, but it always helps convey the overall tone of the gifsets!

Tag someone who motivates you to step up your game:

is it a cop out to say literally everyone on this site? i’m not even joking. seriously, i’m in a lot of tags and i see edits ranging from people who have been vigorously giffing for years vs people who just started and every single edit inspires me to keep going. i would not be where i am with giffing if it weren’t for the support i get from people or seeing beautiful edits every single day.

Tag someone who you have taken inspiration from:

@owenjoyner and @bisexualsdean diana and el both have such creative minds that i often find myself tagging everything they make with my inspiration tag! the way they format their gifs especially influence me!

Tag gif makers who you admire and appreciate! (Put as many people here as you want!):

@stilestilinskies @denalifoxx @owenjoyner @bisexualsdean @alinastarksov @inejghafta @sambuckv @laufeysons @spencershastings @lizzie-mcguires @abigailshobbs @kellyabbott @oretsevmal @inej-g @austin-mahones @malikjavaddzayn @bukleys @dani-clayton @madeline-kahn

#if you follow me and i didnt tag you just say i did because i appreciate you !#🏷️#star talks

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reachfolk · 3 years ago

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So, I only just started to follow you but I couldn't resist when I saw your main girl. I just love her. So, I'm curious as to how she would be with my Skyrim Gal.

Azirina Kharabbi is a Suthay-raht Khajiit (basically a baby) who is 21 years old and also has the nickname "Moon-Chaser", along with a few other names she chooses to ignore. She came to Skyrim at the age of twelve, having escaped the destruction of her village, ran across the deserts of Elsweyr (chasing the moons) and boarding a ship, giving her alot of trauma. She travelled across Skyrim with one of the many Khajiit caravans until the discovery that she was the last Dragonborn.

She's a sassy little fireball, who is nicknamed "Sabre Kitten" by Farkas (who I paired her with). This is due to the fact she looks as adorable and as timid as a kitten, but will not hesitate to rip your kneecaps out should you insult her or a loved one. That being said, she was easily startled to begin with when she joined the companions, and suffered horrendously with an addiction whilst aiding them. She also keeps a key point of her past secret, trying to hide it from everyone, with the only way to find out about it being seeing a mark on her shoulder.

ask game: send me an ask telling me about one of your oc's and i'll tell you how i think they'd get along with my own oc's (OPEN)

aaa thank you so much, you're so sweet !! i love your oc too omg, the nicknames moon chaser and saber kitten are perfect. i do think alexi would like her but again, alexi is just full of love so that's not surprising lol. i'm gonna actually put this under a read more because god, i just have SO much to say !! i hope you don't mind 😅

alexi travelled all across skyrim as well, both when she was living with her family and after she left home. while a lot of nords, especially nobles, think pretty negatively of khajiit, alexi grew up in a more liberal household where such nonsense wasn't tolerated at all. she and her siblings definitely kept tabs on whether any caravans were visiting town and made a point to check them out every time. anyway, this is a long winded way of saying all three of my silver-blood kiddos almost definitely ran into azirina plenty of times, including when they were young!

azirina is six years younger than alexi, which is around the same age as robin and marceline (alex's siblings). i really like the idea that azirina's caravan visited markarth when she was around thirteen and alexi was nineteen. the three siblings probably took one look at azirina and collectively were like, "new friend? new friend!!" and swept her up into their group immediately. partly because she's just a cutie, but also they've never met a kid at the caravans! of course they're interested in getting to know her!

there's this weird unspoken rule in skyrim about khajiit caravaners entering cities, but given the silver-bloods' status, i think the guards would turn a blind eye to most of what they do. so, if azirina accepts, the siblings would definitely want her to come inside the walls and hang out with them while she's in town. they usually get up to some pretty ridiculous shit (messing with town guards, stupid dares about stealing from the jarl, the kind of stuff only rich kids can get away with if they get caught, y'know?), but i think alexi would be smart enough to know not to get this kid into that kinda trouble, so they tone it down when they're hanging out with azirina. they'd buy her a nice meal and show her the pretty spots around town and play games with her (tag and hide-and-seek are classics, but they also would try to rope her into a game of potion roulette at some point, as a bunch of rowdy ass kids with too much access to their auntie's alchemy supplies are wont to do 💀)

of course, how open azirina is with them is up to you, but the kids would try to make her feel as comfortable and welcome as possible. i feel like after everything the poor girl went through, it would be good for her to have some kids her age around her, especially in a place like skyrim which can be really harsh to khajiit.

edit: OK my 🤡 ass accidentally posted this before i got all my thoughts out so i hope it's ok if i keep going!!

so even if azirina doesn't really open up to the gang early on, they'd be understanding and patient. they might prod a little into her story early on, but if it ever gets uncomfortable for her, they'd back off. i think what would make the atmosphere comfortable is the fact that they always leave room for her to join in and feel heard but they don't pressure her to, y'know?

i don't doubt they'd run into each other for a few days every couple of months, whenever their travels happen to bring them together. usually at markarth, but often times in other cities like solitude, riften, or whiterun which the silver-blood kiddos often visit.

after a few years of this, alexandria leaves home. she's around 22 at the time, and her siblings are 17. assuming azirina kept in contact with them, i'm really curious how you think she'd handle seeing the tensions that would've caused in her friends' lives. i could write a whole ass thesis on this family and how complicated their lives are, especially after alexi leaves, so i won't bore you with the details. but i am curious to hear your thoughts more abt this !!

like how do you think azirina feels about the silver-blood siblings befriending her? does she play along or does it take time for her to open up, if she ever does? would she envy how (seemingly) perfect their family is after she lost hers in such a tragic way? how does her attitude change as she learns more about how they aren't really such a put together family?

i have so many questions!! i'm sorry i went on for so long but i really like azirina and i'd love to know more about her. i feel like there's so much room for really interesting relationships between her and all three siblings. and this is just scratching the surface!! this isn't even getting into her addiction, or what that secret she's keeping is, or whether she and alexi would go off on any adventures together when they're older. there's so much!!

#i have more to add but my clown ass pressed post too early LMAO we can talk more abt it if you want !!!#itd be interesting to see how azirina reacts to alexi suddenly leaving home and accidentally getting tangled up in their family drama #tes #tesblr #other's ocs #cozy answers #oc: alexandria silver blood #oc: marceline silver blood #oc: robin silver blood

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beclynn-herondale · 4 years ago

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The Fairchild-Herondale family part 1

"hey Cece, what are ya doing," Stephen asked.

"reading, why ya asking?," Celine replied

"okay let's stop that," he said.

"are Mom and Dad not back still?" She asked

"nope, and Will has forbidden me from his little lab, my own brother forbade me," said Stephen dramatically.

"ah yes the rejection if younger siblings, come little brother, sit by me and I will give you wise advice," she said teasingly to her brother.

He snorted and said, " you wise?"

She thought about throwing a book at him but decided not to, it would hurt the book and instead threw the pillow she was sitting on at him.

"oof," he said

"are you two fighting again?" Their older sister Nora asked while coming into the library.

"no," they both said at the same time.

Nora gave them a suspicious look, Nora was half Faerie and half Shadowhunter, she had beautiful brown hair and pretty brown eyes, she was tall as well, her parents both died in the last war, after the cold peace was lifted they could finally have a kid together, her mother was a Shadowhunter and her father was one of the Seelie, Mom and Dad took her in when they heard a child had been orphaned, they were both worried that because she was half Faerie some Shadowhunters may not accept her, but mom and dad have raised her as their own and never made her feel as if she isn't their daughter, but they also keep her connected to her faerie heritage as well, something Celine has admired about her parents.

"Dad texted me, they'll be gone until late, so I gotta cook dinner and need your help, so come on my little siblings, we must cook," said Nora

"Where's Alex?" asked Celine

"taking a nap," said Nora as all three of them made their way to the kitchen.

Will and Tess were sitting at the table reading and being stuck together like they always have been since birth

"there's the brother who rejected me," said Steph jokingly

"I rejected you because you were playing with my stuff and I don't appreciate you playing with it, my things aren't toys, Steph. No matter if you think so or not," Will replied, with that strange matureness for a 13 year old to have.

Stephen just looked at him dramatically, he was such a drama queen

"I mean you can always watch him when he's doing experiments, Steph," said Tess, sweet as always.

"see Tess doesn't reject me," Stephen said

And Nora let out a long and annoyed sigh

"hey losers," Lottie said as she walked after she appeared to have been training, Lottie took her Shadowhunter training very serious and so did Celine, but Lottie always seemed to be more serious about it, Mom and Dad always said there will probably not be a big war ever again hopefully but Lottie didn't seem as convinced of that.

"Lottie, don't call us losers," said Nora, always the second mom

"I mean affectionately," she said with that angel smile of hers

"so when are Mom and Dad gonna be back?" Lottie asked.

"not till late, we'll probably all be asleep," Nora answered.

"they have been gone all the time lately," Lottie said

They all missed their parents when they had to be away for long, they were a very close family and it was hard to be apart, more so for Lottie, she and Dad always hung out, she was their fathers mini me, and Celine was a daddy's girl so it was hard for her too, it was something her and Lottie would stay up late talking about when their parents were gone and she would climb in bed with Celine, how their Dad always took the time for them and was patient and spent as much time as he could with them, their mom did too and they loved their parents for it.

"I'm gonna go check on Alexis," Celine announced.

"okay, Lottie can help me now that she's done training," Nora said.

And Lottie sighed but helped their older sister without complaint.

As Celine was making her way to her baby sister's bedroom she couldn't help but remember when Stephen was first born the memories were blurry but she could still remember, she had been a big sister many times since then but still the first time finding out is always special, she wasn't jealous her parents had told her, she couldn't wait actually.

As she walked into her baby sister's bedroom she saw that she was lying awake just staring at the ceiling, Celine often wondered if she saw ghosts already

"hey there sunshine, what you looking at?"

Alexis replied with a baby laughter, funny story about Alex is she was a surprise baby, Celine couldn't help but find it funny, and she was happy that her parents had one more, she was older and could be extremely involved this time, their parents were always worried and if it weren't for Uncle Simon and Aunt Izzy living very close to the Institute, Mom and Dad would have taken Alex with them most likely.

She was almost a year old now and was at that stage where she was doing all kinds of things.

"now my sweet one, we must go face our siblings in the kitchen— wait where's Jamie!, I totally forgot about her, sorry Alex we gotta go find her," Celine said.

"Cece, did you you yell my name just now," Jamie asked as she walked into the nursery

"oh, there you are, what have you been doing?" Celine asked her little sister

"I was drawing, I told Nora that earlier," she said

"well everyone is down in the kitchen, you wanna come and help me feed Alex a snack?" She asked

"yeah," answered Jamie.

They both went down to the kitchen, Alex as usual was make all kinds of noises at everything and Celine couldn't help but laugh a couple of times.

When they made it to the kitchen, Steph was hugging Will and Will was trying to get free, Tess was looking at them both with a worried look, Nora and Lottie were cooking and arguing about what spice they should use, now this was what family dinner was usually like .

"well kiddo looks like we gotta go through a battle," Celine said amused

"why are they the way they are?" asked Jamie

"you picked that up from uncle Alec didn't you?" She asked

"Uncle Alec knows what he's talking about," said Jamie. and they both laughed cause of the truth.

And once dinner was done and they all ate and did their own thing for a bit, they got the little kids ready for bed and put them to bed, and the older kids did as well shortly after, and when they all woke up tomorrow their parents should be back, Celine could hardly wait.

I wasn't sure if I was gonna post this but you know what, I am not the best writer but I did enjoy writing this and for some reason I want to post it now.

Tagging @chibi-tsukiko and @khaleesiofalicante

#clary fairchild #jace herondale #oc celine fairchild herondale #oc nora fairchild herondale #oc stephen fairchild herondale #oc lottie fairchild herondale #oc tessa fairchild herondale #oc will fairchild herondale #oc jamie fairchild herondale #oc alexis fairchild herondale #tsc #the shadowhuter chronicles #tmi #the mortal instruments #tsc the next generations #clary fray #jace lightwood herondale #bec's fanfics #tsc fanfiction

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