#i am still holding my breath and trying to avoid having an opinion on a show not out yet

[acewizardinspace]

I don't plan to watch The Acolyte unless my pro jedi pals give it, at the very least, the 'unreliably narrator pass'. BUT, that being said, I think it would be so fucking funny if the show tries very hard to be anti jedi by having the protagonist hate the jedi, and having this hate be justified by the narrative, only for the actual stuff the jedi do to be 100% correct. Like it would be so so funny if the characters are like "Look how evil the jedi are!! They choose to protect thousands of people over ME THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN THE UNIVERSE!!!!"

[ode2rin]

just a short fluff for itoshi sae before i commit to my full fic for him, figured that i need to let this out to be able to focus on my sch works ._. | warning: a lil ooc sae and not proof read !

sae is giving you the cold shoulder. 

and if you counted it right, you’ve received a total of two side-eyes and an eye roll from him.

he’s obviously mad at you, and you don’t know whether to feel bad or laugh your ass off for the reason why.

apparently, sae finds it extremely offensive that you did not use his credit card for the groceries he asked you to buy. if he didn’t open his phone to check his emails while you sorted out the said groceries, he wouldn’t know that you did not use the black card he handed you. there was no notification from his bank indicating the non-use of the card.

“you didn’t use my card?”

“hm? oh yeah. it’s in my wallet. figured it wasn’t mu– wait why are you glaring at me?”

in your opinion (which he finds dumb), it’s nothing so bad, actually. but sae has been acting as if you committed a heinous crime under his name and you ran away from it. the way he’s acting right now is so far from what the public knew about him. huffing and puffing, blatantly avoiding looking at you. the older itoshi has a habit of being a bit dramatic, only a few knew that.

scratch that, only you know that.

“sae,” you say, trying to get his attention.

“sae!”

“i’m trying not to talk to you, if you can’t tell.”

you let out an amused chuckle at his reply, in which you received your third side-eye of the day. 

“what? i didn’t think it would be this big of a deal.”

sae scoffed, “well, it is to me.”

sensing the gravity in his tone, your steps led you towards the couch where he sat. without hesitation, you eased yourself next to him, sinking into the soft cushions. you curled your arms around his, feeling the warmth of his skin and the strength of his muscles. as you nestled closer, you rested your chin on his broad shoulder, feeling the rise and fall of his chest with every breath he took.

though he still faced away from you, you reached out to hold his hand that was resting on his thigh, interlacing your fingers with his. despite the anger simmering just beneath the surface, he didn't resist your gesture. sae was not one to deny physical affection from you, even when his emotions were running high. and you rightfully took advantage of that whenever the situation called for it, as it did right now.

“alright. i’m sorry,” you say, looking at your interlocked hands.

“are you, really?” a hint of sarcasm tinged his voice.

he was right, you weren't.

turning to face him, “yes, i’m not sorry. it wasn’t much, and the groceries were for the both of us. can’t i do that at least?” 

“it’s not about what you can do. it’s about what i want to do for you.”

sae briefly glanced at you before turning his gaze to the front as if he didn't want to see your reaction to what he said.

the truth is, sae thinks you deserve a nobel prize for putting up with him. but he couldn’t give you that, nor could he perfectly put into words how grateful he was to have you by his side.

sae could only show you, and this was one of his only ways. you can't take it away from him, much to your displeasure in using his money.

feeling touched from the sincerity of your lover’s words, you could only let out a sacred whisper of his name. he turned to you at the sound of his name coming out from your lips.

oh, how he loves that sound.

“don’t do this again,” sae said while running his thumb on your knuckles, still locking his gaze on yours as if he’s committing every one of your features to memory.

leaning closer to you, you felt the anticipation coiling in the pit of your stomach. slowly, his lips met yours in a soft, tender kiss, a gentle gesture that sae hoped conveyed the depth of his feelings for you. he pulled away from the kiss, leaving just enough space for him to speak.

“everything that i am is yours. use it.”

and true enough, he meant every word he said as you read the notification from your bank you received later that day, telling you that sae sent you exactly how much you spent on the groceries.

note. i may or may not have thought of this after seeing that tiktok edit of sae using kali's area codes sound. pls look away, i like my men with money (JUST KIDDING) sae has been plaguing my mind, and i'm hoping that this would alleviate the brainrot bec i can't do this anymore

[drarrily-we-row-along]

Dolonia

Dolonia is defined as: a state of unease prompted by people who seem to like you too much, which makes you wonder if they must have you confused with someone else—someone flawless, selfless, or easy to understand from a distance.

Potter rolled over, pressing his too hot, too sweaty body against Draco's. And in spite of the fact that he was altogether too hot, that he was sticky, and still breathing too heavy, he couldn't find it in himself to complain.

"That was good," Potter said, trailing his fingers over Draco's ribs, brushing back and forth lightly and leaving trails of electricity shaking through Draco's chest.

He hummed, hoping it sounded aloof and noncommittal, like he wasn't trying too hard and didn't care too much about Potter's opinion, anything to convince himself that that was the truth.

"Do you want to order in some food from the Thai place down the street?" he asked, "or maybe we could go out? There's that diner a couple of blocks away, y-"

"You want to eat with me?" he asked incredulously, because fucking was one thing and occasionally sleeping in the same bed after being too tired to move made sense. But going out and eating together was something else entirely.

"Yeah," Potter said, shrugging like it was no big deal. "I'm starving, aren't you? We haven't eaten since lunch and that case was no easy thing to solve."

"Yes," he conceded, "That's what the celebratory sex was for."

Potter laughed, that bright, delighted sound that made it seem like nothing in the world was wrong. "Sure, just." He sat up, looking down at Draco, eyes impossibly large and impossibly green, "do you not want to get food with me? It's fine if you don't," he added, "just say so and I'll leave you to it."

"It's not that I don't want to get food with you," he said with a frown, staring at the mole on Potter's neck to avoid looking into his eyes. "It's just that you seem to be making this into something that it's not."

"What do you mean?" he asked, fingers carding through Draco's hair and brushing the loose strands back off his face.

He rolled his eyes, trying to make himself seem less vulnerable than he actually felt. "It's like you don't remember who I actually am sometimes."

Potter laughed, "Of course I remember who you are. You're my annoying, prat of a partner, too brilliant for his own good. You're the idiot that I come in to work with every morning wondering what sort of chaos my day is about to hold because even simple robbery cases turn into something that has years of ancestral battles and blood magic tied into it. You have very particular tea habits, and you like everything just so. I drive you mad but you still put up with me in your bed anyway."

"You're a good fuck, Potter," he said flippantly.

With a laugh, Potter leaned in and kissed the tip of his nose, like casual affection was the sort of thing that they did. "I know you."

And that reminded Draco of where this had all started, "right, but it's like you don't remember all the other parts, all of the things that came before."

He shrugged, "Why would I? You aren't that person anymore, you don't believe those things, you've turned your entire life around."

"But I am still those things," he said, shaking his head. "Sure, I don't believe what I used to, but that doesn't change that I was raised in that culture, it doesn't change that I still go to have brunch with my parents at the manor every other Sunday, or that I know how to get my way in the Ministry, or that I'm an expert manipulator-"

"Hey," Potter said, cupping his cheek. "Hey. Relax. Take a breath," he said, lips pressing to the crease between Draco's eyebrows. "You're okay. We're okay."

"I'm don't-"

"I know who you are, Draco."

"But-"

He shook his head, "I know who you are. I remember all of the things there are to know about you. I know who you were, I know all of the work you've done to be different, I know who you are now. I know you," he repeated. "Just like you know me. It's what makes us such good partners in the office and out of it." He let out a soft self-deprecating chuckle, "Please don't think that you're the only one of the two of us who's spent the past fifteen years meticulously watching the other. I know you, Draco."

He frowned up at him, uncertain where this could be going then, if Potter consciously chose Draco with all of his faults and flaws instead of just for the convenience of it.

"I know you," he repeated, "and I want you." He shrugged, "I've just been waiting for you to be ready to hear it." He grinned at him, "So, what do you say? Dinner?"

And how could he say anything but yes?

[yeosbbm]

20 Minutes

Smut | MDNI

starring: idol ! mingi x staff ! reader

genre: idol au, established (secret) relationship, light possessiveness

summary: you and mingi have kept your relationship under wraps for a while to avoid the opinions of other’s getting into the mix, however sneaking around does lead to some sexual frustration…but once mingi does get the chance to have his hands on you during a time crunch…well….

warnings: mingi + reader are switches/non specific roles, competing for dominance, indirect exhibitionism, marking, cunnilingus, choking, manhandling, edging, unprotected piv, praise (mainly mingi receiving)

A/n: posting this scrapped experimental draft cuz I’m having severe writers block. Hope you guys had a good, safe Halloween !!

All you were trying to do was bring Mingi a different pair of shoes as well as some rings he requested for his outfit.

But now… Mingi has you pressed against a dressing room wall. Kissing you fervently, pressing his tongue further and further into your mouth, his knee in between your legs adding friction to your heat.

One hand under your shirt ..caressing one breast. While the other has a grip on your hip, helping you grind against his knee.

As risky as this is, you can’t help but lightly smile against his mouth whenever his neediness and desperation seeps out through his quiet whines and groans as well as him rocking his hips into you. Even though you were letting out whines yourself.

Then a voice and some knocks on the door bombards the sensual moment.

“AY. MINGI, I think I left my powder can I check if it’s there.” After hearing that Mingi kisses down your neck before backing away, sighing before sitting down on the makeup chair.

You have to regain your breath and fix your hair before you look up at Mingi in his chair. “Is his setting powder in your drawer.”

“Hhh I really hope not.” Mingi mumbles but to his dismay it was, meaning he has to open the door,, meaning you and him time was over.

You grab it from him and open the door to San tapping his foot and looking into his phone. “Finally..thought you two would never open the door, my stylist will scold me.” All you could do is grin. “Are you still doing his makeup.” San asks.

“Yep unfortunately Mingi messed it up somehow.”

In your peripheral, you see Mingi smile at your words while tapping away on his phone on bubble. “But I want you to do my makeup, the other artist is good but I feel more handsome when you do it. Just come to my dressing room real quick pleaseee.”

This comment makes Mingi pause and furrow his brows. “But Sannie don’t you see my face isn’t done…and it’s rude to talk about your assigned stylist you know…” San sighs and rolls his eyes before making his way back to his styling room.

You walk to Mingi and realize you really do have to fix his makeup. While grabbing supplies he pulls you into his lap facing him, holding you close. You straighten your back and lean forward to do his makeup.

After some time you begin to finish up. Mingi holding your waist and looking up at you.

“(Y/n)” he mumbles hands still holding on to your waist.

“Yes love.” You quickly say having laser focus while doing his eyeshadow.

“Am I good looking to you ?”

“Yes Min you always are, with makeup and barefaced.”

“Is San good looking to you ?” You already know the deal. Mingi has his short phases of jealousy or overthinking. Nothing too harsh or scary.

“,,,all of you are but guess what ?” You question while doing the final touches to his lip tint. He peers up at you while you grab and tilt his face up.

“ You’re the most handsome of them all, my one and only always….you’re always so good to me Mingi..” You say before giving him a small kiss. Bad Idea.

Why is it a bad idea ? Because Mingi loves whenever you praise and gloat on him. He’s staring up at you biting his lip and you can feel his grip on you tighten. He just wants to eat you up and show you how good he really can be.

“Song Mingi it’s time to set up and do positioning, we need you and the guys on stage .” His manager says through the door.

“Time to gooo Mingiii.” He fake whines and throws his head back while holding you closer to him. “Can I at least taste you before I go.” He whispers attempting to put his hand down your pants.

You move his hand and while doing a “tsk tsk tsk” motion. “On stage Min.” He sighs and kisses your forehead..pouting while heading to the stage.

——————-

Once the performance was over it was time to head to the to the next performance venue. The manager lets you ride the same van as the guys if they’re not recording. Reasons being 1) You help them look their absolute best and 2) Per Mingi’s request, they haven’t questioned it.

You sit in the back with your clipboard and makeup bag. While getting your stuff sorted Yunho comes up to you. “(Y/n) do my eyebrows look even..the new stylist did them and she did them so different.”

You have him take a seat by you quickly and observe his makeup. “Not really one is just a little darker I’ll fix it.”

Mingi comes and watches you do Yunho’s makeup. He loves watching you work. He can’t take his eyes from you and you notice, leading you to giggle a bit.

“What’s so funny.” Yunho asks seeming both amused + confused. “Nothing..Mingi is just being cute and silly.” Yunho quirks an eyebrow and laughs, “Ooh so you think Mingi’s cute huh.” Yunho is the only one who has a gists of what’s going on with you and Mingi, but you know he won’t say anything.

Soon you finish and Yunho sits with Seonghwa to play animal crossing on each others switches and Mingi sits by you.

You and Mingi couldn’t keep your hands off each other. He sneaked squeezes of your tits, pretended to whisper in your ear when really he was saying dirty talk and nipping at your lobe + neck.

And you’d retaliate..putting your hand on his thigh until you found the outline of his dick, slowly touching and palming it. Sometimes tugging his hair with your free hand which was his absolute weakness. Praying the members don’t see.

Then you guys arrive.

————————-

After the second performance was over the boys had one more media video to film on their schedule as well as photos to be taken.

You were advised to touch up everyone’s makeup since on most of them it was sweated or smudged away from how hard they danced earlier.

Whilst finishing Wooyoung’s makeup you realize that Mingi wasn’t anywhere to be found and after informing the main managers you went to go find him. After some time you were stuck in basically an empty hall, no other groups or staff could be found.

You went around to a door that seemed a third open. The light was dim and it seemed like a spare waiting room. Once you got to the door however, someone pulls you inside.

Before you could panic you automatically realize it’s Mingi. He has you pressed against the wall, palming everywhere before messily kissing you.

“You’re that needy for me huh.” you say, knowing your demeanor is cracking while under his hold. He nods before rolling his hips for friction to save his throbbing erection. “Want to finish what we started.” He says while exposing your breast, putting his mouth around and nipping your buds.

“Need to make you feel good…” He says lowly, looking at you starstruck. You can’t help but give him what he wants. “You’ve been so good and patient…go ahead.”

Mingi gets on his knees, using his teeth to slide your zipper down. He pulls your pants down far enough to where you can easily pull them up.

Right when his mouth was to be right where both of you wanted. Another interruption occurs, Hongjoong. “Mingi,, (y/n) are you two around here ?!? We have to get to the vans and head over to the next media set…”

Mingi groans defeated while gripping the waist band to your pants. His head flops onto the front of your thighs. You can’t lie, you’re just as frustrated because you knew you were going to let Mingi do whatever he pleased.

But once you started to zip your pants back up he stopped you while standing up. “Guys this isn’t funny, it’s 2:10 and we need to leave at 2:30………Hellllooo.” Mingi hushes you while sliding his hand down your pants, gliding his digits over your panties.

He moves them to the side and gives you his index and middle finger to indulge in.

“Hongjoong, she’s probably at the second floor still looking for him just come wait with the rest of us before you stress yourself out.” Seonghwa shouts out.

“Good God.” Hongjoong sighs before heading back with the members. Once his footsteps were far enough Mingi went into motion.

His fingers speed up and instead of a plain in and out motion he began to curl them into the spot you needed most and curving them for an extra stretch.

You fight through your sighs and moans. “Mingi…we need to head back or we’ll get in trouble.”

“ 20 minutes…just give me 20 minutes.” You can feel his warm breath on your neck while he whispers this to you, practically grinding himself into your leg.

“Please, (y/n) just a taste….fucckk baby I’m begging you...." he whines.

You can’t restrain or play hard to get any longer. “Fuck,, do whatever just..don’t take too long.”

Mingi smiles before he presses a few wet kisses onto your neck and sinking back into his knees like earlier.

He roughly pushes your pants and panties down and off before spreading your legs so he can bury his face into your heat. His fingers are pressed so deeply into your thighs that marks are inevitable.

Soon he’s stroking himself while eating you,, your taste, your face of ecstasy, your sounds..his head is spinning. He’s lapping and digging his tongue into your cunt while mindlessly fisting his dick. Your mind was swirling..you were about to finally burst and cum.

He slows down, only allowing you to indulge in small soft kitten licks and barely moving his thumb across your clit. “Babe…what’s…going on.” You breathe out, trying not to show the need in your tone from the lack of contact. “What do you mean baby..” he smirks only using his thumb, barely swiping your clit and not even giving you access to his mouth. He was playing dumb to annoy you and it was working.

“Why aren’t you touching me.” You whine -needing- some friction. "But I'm already touching you." He fastens the pace of his thumb on your clit making your knees buckle while you moan and whimper.

“About to cum..” you whisper. But Mingi completely stops. Denying your orgasm again. You can feel tears prickle in your eyes. “Admit it…admit that you’re just as needy as me.” He lowly says into your inner thigh, ghosting his mouth over your pussy.

“You’re so pretty like this, so cute with those teary eyes so beautiful.” He sucks and nips marks across your thighs making sure to lick at the reddish purple blotches afterwards. You just can’t let yourself shatter so easily however.

You grab as much of his hair and tug at it moving his head back so his eyes are on yours. Mingi’s dick jumps from the action alone, he loves seeing you above him and being assertive. “What happened to my sweet Mingi..you’re usually so good what happened.”

Mingi’s mind has practically short circuited. Any sense of revenge for the teasing has melted away. “I’m still good, just ask..I’ll give you any and everything you want.”

You lick your lips and take your hand from his hair. “Just be good and fuck me Mingi.” He obliges. Within seconds he’s holding you up..aligning his cock and easily pushing it in since you’re so slick with arousal.

No hesitation he’s pounding and your cunt clenches around him. You’re panting at this point, the air in whatever random room you’re in is now thick and warm from the sex filling it. He’s filling you to the hilt. “It’s like you were made for me.” One of your hands finds it’s way to his neck where you squeeze.

His cock twitches. “Please please please squeeze harder.” You tighten your grip around his neck knowing it’ll leave a light mark. He’s officially ramming you, the sound of skin on skin and your voices leaking out the room.

“So good, so perfect for me Min.” Mingi can’t take it, he pulls your hair and fucks into you faster than before, neither of you even care about dominance anymore..you’re both fucked dumb from each other.

“Gonna fill you, gonna fill you up and you’re gonna like it aren’t you.” He practically growls in your ear, the most you can do is whimper a broken “Yes”.

Soon you both cum, both of your bodies feeling lifeless and weak from all the energy placed into your pleasures. Mouths agape holding each other closer than ever.

———————

You both take the tiny bits of energy you both have left to put your clothes on. You help Mingi fix up his and look into your small purse to tidy his makeup. You do your best to not look destroyed but no matter how matter how clean and composed your face is your disheveled clothes give it away.

“How much time do we have to spare.” He asks while trying to help fix up your clothes. You check your phone, “Shit it’s about 2:27 we have to hurry.” You both rush down to where everyone was, the vans were pulling up.

As soon as everyone saw you two they hashed out their complaints. “You both had us worried, like cmon Mingi did you really have to run off, so much time was wasted.” Hongjoong scolds.

While making your ways to the buses you were advised to sit in the staff bus to keep the time. Yunho and Mingi sat together on the other bus.

“So, how was it.” Yunho nonchalantly asks. “How was what.” Mingi says back nervous. “The closet sex.” Mingi’s eyes widen and he looks around to make sure nobody heard Yunho. “I have no clue what you’re talking about.”

Mingi looks around a final time before leaning to Yunho’s ear.

“It was fucking Amazing.”

——————

LMFOAOOOOOOOOOOO

[fanttasttica]

I hate you more..

Rhysand x reader

Rhysand always knew how to get on your nerves. He was so good at it, that at some point, you started hating him for it., or as you thought. But as we all know, there is a thin line between hate and love..

warnings: nothing? (Feel free to corect me)

words: 3623

Author's note: At first, I thought I could do this and make Rhysand really evil, but I couldn't bring myself to it :D Sorry!

Rhysand, heir to the Night court, surely knew how to get on your nerves. He was bringing out the worst of you. He was provoking you endlessly, always having that smirk on his face. You wanted to punch him. At first, you really liked him. He was insanely handsome and seemed to care dearly about his friends, but one conversation with him was enough for you to change your opinion on him. He didn't once forget to insult you in some way. It doesn't matter if he insulted your intellect, your opinions, looks or other things, he just needed to do it. Like if it was necessary for his survival. His other friends were better, well you haven't talked to them that much and they were probably just ignoring you, but it was better than what Rhysand was doing. You sighed, knowing very well that you don't have a chance to avoid the High lord's son tonight. As if living in the Hewn city wasn't terrible enough, sometimes you had to endure boring balls, you had to pretend you were enjoying yourself, while trying to avoid certain people and never letting down your smile. You sighed, knowing pretty well, there wasn't a point in fighting it. You did not have the power to change anything and there was no chance your family would understand you and let you stay home, even only if it should be this once.

To this point, the ball was tolerable. You weren't having fun or anything like that, but you danced a few times, like your family wanted and then, they let you out of their clutches. You still had to remain in this hall, but since they did not specify where, you were hiding in the darkest corner you found. This was your favorite place. Usually, no one else was near there, since there was nothing else to do than listen to the muted music or get lost in your thoughts. And that's exactly what you were doing. You were lost in your thoughts, well to be precise, you were daydreaming about life you could have if you weren't stuck here, since your birth and probably for the rest of your life, when suddenly you heard a voice, two voices. “Are you sure no one is here?” someone giggled. You didn't know the first voice, but you knew very well who the other one belonged to. “Yeah, don't worry.” This wasn't good. Rhysand was here, not far away from you, in your hiding place and judging by the muffled giggles and other strange noises.. it was clear what he and his companion wanted to do here. You had to get out of here and if possible, unnoticed.

You had to think quickly, if you wanted to leave before he noticed you. Every second spent here was risky. First, you calmed your breathing and tried to figure out where exactly they were. The absence of light you usually welcomed was now troubling you. After you saw them, really close together and kissing, you noticed there was a little space between them and the wall. Was it enough space for you to make your escape? Well, there was the only way you could find out.. After a while, you decided to try it. Rhysand was slowly taking off the woman's dress and you didn't really have to see more of her or of him. You tiptoed over to them, holding your breath and trying not to look at them longer than it was necessary. You were almost out, before you heard a surprised scream, that made you stop and curse under your breath. You felt two pairs of eyes, watching you in shock. You turned at them and smiled like an angel. “Do not worry, I am on my way out of here..”

You started walking away faster, but something, someone, stopped you. “You are not going anywhere.” Rhys's grip on your arm was strong, there wasn't a point in trying to get out of it, but you still tried shaking his hand off. Well, it didn't go anywhere. Meanwhile that girl you saw before ran away past you, not caring how she looked. “Why were you spying on us?” You almost punched him for this. You raised your eyebrows in disbelief. “You think I was spying on you? Well, I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I don't find you that interesting. Actually, looking straight to the Sun would be better than looking at you, when you are making out with some girl.” You couldn't believe he would think something like that. It was ridiculous. “Oh, don't be so jealous, my darling.” Another ridiculous thing, you only rolled your eyes at him and didn't bother to answer. “Let me go, Rhysand.” Struggling against his strong grip wasn't making any progress. It only made things worse, his grip tightened around your arm as he pushed you back in the corner where you two met a few minutes ago. Suddenly, you were in the same situation as the girl before, your back pressed against the wall and Rhysands face only a few centimeters from yours.

You didn't know why, but your heart started beating rapidly faster than it was usual. You were looking him in the eyes, not sure what to do now. “Are you sure you want me to let you go? Because it didn't look like that.” His lips brushed against your neck, planting soft kisses along the way. He was surprisingly gentle. His hands were traveling all over your body, as he pulled away from your neck and looked you in the eye, then on your lips, as if he was asking for permission. Permission you didn't give him. Shaking your head, you pulled away, finally woken up from that weird trance you were in. “I.. I.. You.. Don't ever do that again. Am I clear? I do not want this, I don't want you.” After you said this, he finally let you go, backing away from you, but he was still smirking. “I mean it, Rhysand. I hate you.” He chuckled and winked at you. “I hate you too, darling.”

After your last encounter with Rhys, you were avoiding him even more, if it was possible. What was worse is the fact that you were finding yourself staring at him, not knowing why. It was annoying. Sometimes, when he noticed you, he flashed a big smile at you, or winked at you, provoking you without any doubt, exactly like today. “After you saw another of his grins, you turned your head away and began to talk to another one of many people who were here, celebrating Highlord's son's birthday. Once again, you were in the ballroom, wearing a dress picked by your mother and chatting with people she found, as she would say, good enough for you. To be honest, they were only good enough for her. You on the other hand, couldn't imagine more boring people, so when Rhysand interrupted you, you almost wanted to thank him. “I am sorry for interrupting your conversation..” He looked at you. “But I want to ask Y/N for a dance.”

Obviously, you agreed to the dance. Not that you had much to say. How would it look if you would deny the High lord's son? Especially when it's his birthday today? During the dance, you were moving elegantly all around the dance room, not talking to each other, until he decided to break that silence. “By the way, you don't need to be thanking me for saving you. I am glad I could help you.” You bite your tongue, before you could say something rude. This isn't a place for you to curse him. When you did not answer him, he continued, “Did I tell you how awful you look tonight? That dress is awful.” You sighed and looked him in the eyes for the first time since he took you on the dance floor. “Every time you do something.. at least a little bit nice for me, you have to also ruin it by saying things like this. Why are you doing it?” For the first few meetings, you were being nice to him. You gave him a taste of his own medicine after a while, when you really had enough of his rude behavior. “Why wouldn't I? Maybe I just find your angry little face funny.” He shrugged. This answer wasn't enough for you, but it was obvious that he isn't going to tell you anything else, so you endured the rest of your dance in silence.

Over the next few months, many things changed. You didn't know how and why exactly, but the lady of Night was murdered with her daughter by people from the Spring court. And as a revenge, Rhysand and his father killed almost every member from the High lords of spring family. Actually, the only one who survived was Tamlin, who had become the new High lord. You didn't know him or his family, but something in you told you, that his brothers and father deserved their fate. The lady of Night was probably the nicest person you knew. She was more of a mother to you than a biological one. And who could hate her little daughter? It was a tragedy, but two good things came out of it. The first concerned the High lord, or rather the former High lord, who also lost his life. He was replaced by Rhysand, who you didn't see as much of now thanks to his new duties, which was that second good thing. Well.. If you were to be honest, you would have to admit that you started to miss him. Without your arguing, life here was rather.. boring. That was until your parents decided to find you a husband, so you could finally be useful for your family, as they would say.

You didn't allow yourself to believe your family would find someone at least tolerable for you, but they.. did. His name was Lucius. You two were not in love, but you started liking him, as a friend. And it was more than you were ever hoping for. Wedding was set to happen three weeks from now. The only thing missing was permission from the High lord, which your father had to ask for since you were part of a higher-ranking family and he should be back with it any minute now. You were sitting in your room now, when you heard a door slamming hard, it made you jump in surprise. And out of curiosity, you decided to go find out what made someone so angry.

As you made your way in your dining room, you saw your father with your father arguing out loud. “What's happening?” They turned to you, in annoyance. Your uncle scoffed at you and your father shook his hand in disappointment. “He didn't give me that permission..“ This caught you off the guard. “What, why?”  You were understanding his motives. Did he really hate you so much, he was destroying probably your only chance at happiness? You were certain he knew that you got along with your fiance, well now ex-fiance, pretty well. One of his friends was a spy at the end. “And how should I know? Y/N.. Go to your room, practice your dancing and conversation skills. We will find someone new for you on the next ball.” 

You felt a pair of eyes watching you almost immediately after you walked into the ballroom. You didn't need to look at Rhysand, you just knew it was him, so you decided to ignore him. After everything he had done to you, this was the worst and you have had enough. Unfortunately, he wasn't on the same page, because after a few minutes, he appeared right next to you, asking for a dance. And since your family was near and heard him, you simply couldn't deny him. It was almost a tradition. At every ball, Rhysand would try to piss you off, dance with you, insult you and then ignore you until the next ball. Well he was ignoring you and watching you closely at the same time, like now, when you took his hand and allowed him to take you on the dance floor once again.

Music started playing and you weren't wasting any time. If you have to dance with him, you could get some answers at last. “Why didn't you give my father that permission? I got it, you hate me, but this? This was over the line.” Your voice was cold, filled with rage you couldn't hold back anymore. At this point, you didn't care if you would make a scene in front of your family and other people. “He wasn't good enough for you. Plus we both know, you only saw him as a .. friend. If that is what you call people you know for only a month.” You chuckled and shook your head. “And who is good enough for me? And why do you think you have the power to decide that?” He shrugged and pulled you closer. “Well, I am the most powerful High lord, so..” This was undoubtedly true, you felt his power intensively, but somehow, you didn't feel frightened because of that. “And I am surely better than him.” 

At first, you weren't sure if you heard him correctly. You blinked twice, giving him a chance to explain the meaning of his words to you. “I know I didn't actually act like it but.. I love you, Y/N. I always had. You are.. my mate.” After this, you stopped dancing, looking at him, as if he was insane, before you also finally felt the mating bond to fall in place. Maybe you should end your dance with him and then walk off to some empty room, where you could talk this out. Or maybe you should go right away, but the first thing that came to your mind was to turn away from him and run away.

He didn't let you go that easily. He started running after you immediately, shouting your name, but you weren't listening to him.. On your way, you bumped into many people, before you finally got out of the ballroom. The halls were empty, well almost. The few people who were standing here looked at you in shock. You didn't give them the second look as you continued running away with tears streaming down your face. Not quite sure if they were angry or sad, you were only sure they weren't happy. You were mad at Rhysand. You always thought he hated you. He was nonstop rude at you, he made you hate him and you thought he felt the same and now he was telling you this? After what he had just done? This seemed cruel, even for him. You weren't sure how or when you managed to run from him, but you didn't care much. The most important thing was that he isn't following you anymore. You walked slowly to your house, then to your room, where you locked yourself away from everyone.

To your surprise, your family wasn't scolding you the first thing in the morning. And you were sure, it was only thanks to Rhysand. Honestly, it was nice of him, but also the least thing he could do, after everything he had done in the past. During the night, you haven't got enough sleep. You couldn't stop thinking about what had happened and the same scenario was repeated the next night and also night after that. There were dark circles under your eyes as a proof of your tiredness, but you were very well aware that until you clear everything up and think about what you will do next, you won't be able to close your eyes in peace. And although you were trying, you couldn't think of the best way how to approach this.

Another day full of thinking was almost over, when you suddenly were snapped out of your thoughts by a short knock on your door. You stood up from your bed, you were laying on for the past week, not bothering to check your look in the mirror before opening the door. You were expecting to see your parents, but no. It was a beautiful blond girl, Morrigan, Rhysand's cousin. On her face was a sympathetic smile as she nodded to your room. “Can I go in?” Knowing pretty well, it would be rude to not let her, you backed off the way, let her in and closed the door behind her.

For a while, she was silent, walking slowly around your room, scanning it with interest in her eyes. Finally,s he turned to you. “You know why I am here.” You nodded. It wasn't that hard to guess, she probably came not to check on you, but to persuade you into giving Rhysand a chance. “Good.. I just.. I just want you to give him a chance to explain himself. You have every right to be mad at him, honestly I would be very surprised, if you weren't. And I also know that my word doesn't mean nothing at all, but.. I am sure you would change your opinion, only if you would listen to him for five minutes..” She sighed. “He is a good male, Y/N. Not many people can see it, because he doesn't allow them to see it, but he really is.” You did not respond right away, looking down on your carpet, you considered once again your options. You could refuse and remain mad at him, not speak to him ever again.. But you could have resorted to both of these things even after talking to him. In addition, you deserved some answers. Suddenly, your next move was clear. 

After you change your clothes, you let Morrigan winnow you to Velaris, sometimes called Court of Dreams, as she told you. You were surprised that a city like that existed and remained secret to every Fae who did not live in it. As you found out, Rhysand had something to do with that. You saw it only briefly, but you fell in love with this place in a second, hoping that you will have the chance to explore its beauty later, but now, you had to focus on something else. You were standing in front of the door that led to Rhysand's office, calming your breath, before you finally knocked. 

After hearing Rhysand's strong voice inviting you to go in, you didn't waste any second. You were afraid that you could change your mind, even though you were already here and deep inside you knew, this was the best thing you could do. You needed to hear his explanation. Rhysand was standing behind his big wooden table, with a concentrated and a bit worried expression. “Hello, Y/N. Thank you for coming.” You nodded, “Hello to you too.” He gestured on the chair, which stood opposite his, into which he had just settled. The only thing between you two was that table, full of papers. “Why did you do it?” He smiled a little at you. “Not wasting any time, are you?” You did not smile back, your face remained expressionless. He sighed and looked down. “Believe it or not, I was only trying to protect you. You know.. what my father was like. The bond snapped for me actually the first time we met and I panicked. Maybe I don't think he would try to kill you, but I am sure he would try to hurt you psychically.” He swallowed hard. “And I couldn't let that happen. That is why I put on that mask. I was behaving like I hate you, when in reality, you were my first and last thought every day. I tried to do anything to forget about you. Like that one time on the ball, where you caught me with that girl..” He shook his head and looked you in the eyes. “I know sorry doesn't erase the things I did, like practically canceling your engagement, or words I said to you in the past, but if you will allow me.. I will spend the rest of my life making up with you..” 

You were looking at the male in front of you. You thought, you knew him quite well. Not that long ago, you thought he was a spoiled son of the ruthless High lord, not that different from his father. But now? You already knew this wasn't true. He did bad things, but he did them trying to protect you. Maybe he should have used a different way, but did it even exist? After a few minutes of silence between you two, you stood up, with Rhys following by your example. Without a word, you walked around the table until you were standing right in front of him. When you were looking into those gorgeous violet eyes, you knew that you no longer hated him. Actually.. You probably did not hate him for a while now, it just took a while to realize. You put one of your hands on his cheek, stroking it gently. “I love you.” After you said these three words, you could swear that you saw a thousand stars lit up in his eyes. He hugged your waist, pulling you closer, before whispering, “I love you more.”

[vintagegirl01]

I have a feeling we aren’t in the 21st century anymore! (Chapter 1)

AU Young Leto Atreides x fem! reader

Summary: You find yourself in a time and place you aren’t familiar with. Now trying to find your way home, you come across a man unlike any other.

Everyday the same thing happens. You go to work. Tend to your responsibilities at home. Eat. Sleep. Repeat.

Though you know you should enjoy the monotony of knowing how and when things are going to happen, you can’t help but still yearn for more to do with your life.

Despite getting your degree and finding a part-time job to pass time until you are able to find a more permanent career path, you can’t help but feel as if you aren’t living your life the way you should be. Still in your early twenties and have no idea what you’re supposed to be doing with your life. Nevertheless, you go by the motions because you hold onto the hope that one day everything will fall into place as it should.

After finishing your nightly routine, you get into the sheets of your bed and close your eyes. Believing that what you’re seeking out of life will find you soon.

_________________________________________

When you wake up, you are shocked to see that you are no longer in your room. Instead, you seem to be inside a passageway of some kind that looks to have been abandoned based on the amount of cobwebs and dust you try to avoid inhaling.

Noticing the lanterns at the bottom, you decide to follow them in the hopes that it will lead you out of here.

As you make your way out of the passageway, you take notice of how dark everything is. A few minutes pass and you finally seem to be getting somewhere when you see a brown wooden door. You then open the door as quietly as you can to get an idea of where you are since you heard voices.

Looking from the doorway, you notice that the area is heavily surrounded by guards, male and female, wearing heavy metal suits.

Almost looks like something you see in sci-fi movies, you thought.

Noticing that none of them are facing you directly, you decide that your best plan of action would be to slowly walk away from their direction and begin walking where your feet will carry you. You have no idea where that is but anything is better than sitting around doing nothing at all.

Before moving forward with this plan, you barely remembered that you are still wearing your Dr. Strange Multiverse shirt and flannel looking shorts . Realizing that you will already stick out, you decide it may be best to try and draw less attention to yourself.

Looking around you, you notice there’s a long, brown hooded cape that is hanging on what looks to be a nail. Deciding it’s your best bet, you shake out whatever mess you could off of it and put it on.

You check if the close is clear one more time before heading out.

So far, so good, you thought.

You feel confident that you are about to get out soon until you suddenly hear a voice behind you ask.

“ Are you lost?”

_________________________________________

Thinking through your opinions carefully, you decide to feign ignorance (mostly because you have no idea where you are) and pretend you are looking for directions out of me.

As you turn around, you almost hold your breath at the man in front of you. This man is one of the most handsome men you’ve ever seen.

He is of average height with wavy hair and kept up facial hair and is wearing a dark green uniform of some kind.

Although, the think that you are most entranced with by him his dark brown eyes. As they seem to have this intensity that would make any woman feel special.

Not wanting to look more like a fool in front of him due to you lack of a quick response, you decide to talk to him.

“Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?”

“You’re in Caladan castle.”

“Caladan, can’t say I’ve heard of that city or country before.”

“My lady. Caladan isn’t any of those things. It’s a planet. The one that has proudly been my ancestral home, House Atreides Home, for about 10,000 years.”

“Planet? 10,000 years. Wait…” You begin taking in your surroundings more seriously as well as the information this man has told you. “What year is it?”

“10,172.”

“Oh.”

As soon as the handsome man finishes telling you this, the last thing you see is darkness with so many running thoughts.

No way are you that far into the future. One minute you were asleep in your room, the next you end up in an unknown place and time.

Tagging:

@autismsupermusicalassassin

[toiletwipes]

cry for absolution - episode two

vampire!wilbur x reader - 4.3k - AO3

warnings: typical vampire shenanigans, jared is an asshole

notes: mmmmmmm smooth brain rn, enjoy tho

<;- previous episode -> masterlist

taglist: @your-shifting-gurl @lillylvjy @mosslovestherain @burification @sweet-soot @saccharinesunset

The click of the door shutting is louder than the heart beating in your ears, what with Wilbur being the one to shut the door. You can only watch him while you’re sitting on the bed, holding your arms close to your torso, your nails digging into your exposed skin.

Nothing is said in the first few moments, just Wilbur taking in the room and your observations of him doing so. Truthfully, he acts like he’s never seen this room before, but with how old he is and how many familiars he has had, it’s hard to believe such an act. His hands slide from his sides to pat his legs, puttering with his lips. Avoiding a conversation. You would begin to wonder if he was about to fire you but considering a few minutes ago, he defended- well, it’s not your honor but he still defended you, even if it was over something so trivial as being his familiar. You’re quick to adjust your opinion on it, the business of being a familiar is anything but trivial.

His voice comes out so quick, you’re startled when he speaks, “I want to say that what Jared was saying was completely unacceptable and that he shouldn’t have said that at all to you. He has a horrible habit of trying to harass my familiar and I should’ve taken measures against him entirely. And for the lack of any preparation for him, or for what you’ve gone through in the last few hours, I am sorry.” Half of the words didn’t process, and you almost lost the apology itself in the messy string of words but you caught it still.

“I… appreciate the apology. But you’re right, it was-... -it was cruel to toss me in and expect me to know how to manage all- all of this.” He nods and this time, he’s able to look towards you. You’re still on the fence of whether or not you should be looking at him at all but you risk a glance, catching him staring right at you.

He’s still so, so pretty, your mind sighs, and your eyes dart back down, reaching to pick at a loosely-flying thread on your pants, maybe he’ll be kind enough to let you stare longer, let you have the privilege that he so easily flaunts. Feeling particularly dangerous, going against the guide, you look up for a second time and you’re happy to see that he doesn’t hurt you, doesn’t reprimand you for looking once, then twice. He almost looks… satisfied. Almost. 

“I know I didn’t get to finish sweeping, did you want me to do that after we’re done talking…” you trail , when he waves you off, mumbling about how you shouldn’t worry about that for now and under his breath it sounds like he forgot something when he snaps his fingers and gasps..

“I almost forgot,” he says, his smile widening, “here’s a card. Use it to get whatever you need.” His hand disappears into the breast pocket right below his heart and pulls out a small envelope.

You feel you must look dumb for blankly staring, blinking at the offered hand, and upon realizing that, your fingers grab it with the utmost care you could muster. Sliding your finger down the sealed part, you fiddle with the envelope till a card, shiny and new, drops into your lap. 

Looking over it, you don’t even realize what you’re saying until Wilbur stiffens hearing the words falling off of your tongue, “Does that mean I get to go outside, like off the property?”

“This isn’t- you’re not a prisoner. You’re my familiar.” He says with a frown as if that made any clear difference.

“You never really, actually explained, in full detail, what that means, you know.” You say as you hold the card up to the light, struck by just how new it appears. It’s cold to the touch, smooth contrasting the raised numbers on the card, still, you could trick yourself you could feel a faux heat emitting from the card, as if fresh from the printer.

“Right, as I’ve said, that’s my mistake.” He clears his throat and is unable to look at you again. And with him looking away, you feel it's okay to look at him now. Especially the sides of his face, truth be told, you don’t think you could ever be bored looking at him. He’s pleasant in the eyes, how are you supposed to defend yourself? Besides when his eyes move back over to your face and you hold eye contact with him, he doesn’t reprimand you. Doesn’t say anything, only holds it. Then he smiles. A win is a win.

“So since I can go, do you need anything from the store?” Wilbur is quickly sent to shock when he sees you slide only a thin jacket over your arms and your sandals on your feet.

“Now- you’re going to go now?” He follows you to the door.

You turn to him, hand on the handle as you give him a dubious look, “I’m going to get snacks, I won’t be out for long.” And true to his word, he doesn’t shackle your ankles to the house, even if for a split moment he looks like he’s close to doing so. He lets you out of the house and waves bye and everything. But even then, on the way to the gas station, you feel someone’s eyes on you. The worst part is you’re unsure if the beholder of the eyes are kind or not. Your gut tells you to be careful.

The nearest gas station isn’t far, just three blocks, a brisk walk in the fall night air that washes away the day. It’s relaxing to listen to the sound of your footsteps and the steady intake and exhale of your breath. It’s normal besides for when you feel pulled to look behind you, just to check if that ever present feeling of being watched is in fact someone following you. 

Every time you find the space behind you on the sidewalk to be empty as the ominous sight of your new home fades into the distance. 

When you get to the gas station it feels almost strange how normal it is, so separate from your new world of grandiose paintings and hiding bodies. You never thought the buzzing of fluorescent lighting would be comforting. The cashier flashes you a tired smile before returning to scrolling on her phone, idly pushing a strand of dark hair behind her ear. You pick out a few things, foods you know you would eat, ramen that could be considered a meal enough, and a Gatorade from the fridge that leaves your skin wet with condensation. 

“Will that be all?” the front counter lady asks you as you push your arms full worth of stuff to her.

“Yep,” you chirp, fumbling to fish out Wilbur’s card from your worn wallet. You look at the piece of plastic again, it feels slightly like you are stealing. When you look back up the cashier is waiting for you expectantly and you mumble an apology before paying with a small thank you. 

“Have a good night,” she says, handing you the bags full of food with a raised brow. 

“You too!” you say, pretending like you weren’t being just a bit strange. It still feels nice to talk to a normal breathing person, one you can assume doesn’t believe in vampires. You sigh when you leave though, the knowledge unknowingly weighing on you? It’s stupid, the way it seems your new job has changed your perspective on life. You wonder if bigfoot is real, if mummies are? You are almost certain that Mothman is, it just makes sense. 

‘Home’ doesn’t seem appealing as you wander your way to a bench, settling down with your companion in the shape of your groceries beside you as you crack open the previously bought Gatorade. Your brain swims with questions, with possibilities that allude you. Your new life is confusing but you can’t bring yourself to hate it even if deep down you think you should. 

You still feel watched as you get up and mosey your way back to your broom closet of a room. When you get home no one greets you but for that you are thankful. You stuff the various snacks you bought into the trunk under your bed. You assume it’s as good a place as any. You can’t help but collapse into the shitty mattress and fall asleep. 

That itching feeling of being watched ends up returning every time you leave the house during the night, two weeks pass and it persists.  You guess you wouldn’t put it past Wilbur to make sure you are behaving? But two weeks seemed like overkill to you and more than just slightly unsettling, so you focused on leaving during the day. Wilbur usually gave you a small list of things to do during the hours of light, but so far the tasks remained mundane, more cleaning and organizing, fruitless things such as reorganizing the bookshelf. 

Sometimes they delved darker, cleaning up messes of blood that were not there one second but were the next. Red that trailed down the walls and pooled on the wooden floors, scarlet just barely staining the dark rug in the library, and vermillion on the unused kitchen floor. 

You had read more of the manual besides Roger’s advice to turn away from it. You laughed as it detailed which urban legends of vampires were true. Yes, they had to be invited in but no, they do not sparkle in the sun. Yes, they can turn into bats? I guess you would have to wait to see that. Yes, they could not see themselves in mirrors, silver burned their skin, and the sun would burn them. You raised your brow as the manual seemed to insist you find virgins? for your Master. You reread the page again and again searching for some clarity on why but found no such answer. It made you feel kind of gross so you sought out Roger, the man of, you assume, infinite knowledge. 

“Roger?” you ask quietly, carefully tapping him on the shoulder, disturbing his own cleaning regimen that seemed simultaneously more in-depth but also less work than yours. 

“Hm?” he asks, tilting his head at your sudden want to speak. 

“Can I ask you some more questions, just been reading the manual and-” he cuts you off. 

“No need to explain, what it is?” he asks and suddenly you feel heat in your cheeks. 

“Virgins, why, uhm, why could that possibly be relevant ooo-or,” 

“They taste better,” he says simply, turning back to his chore. 

“Like their blood?” you clarify even though you don’t know any other possibilities for the answer to that question. He nods without looking at you, carefully rearranging the mantle place. You wince slightly as the knowledge runs over you. It’s partly because maybe this endangers you in the workplace. I mean, there is no way it works like that, that they taste better? You shiver slightly and nod to yourself, wringing your fingers as the time passes by silently until you turn, putting one foot after the other. Roger watches you walk away intently, it makes your skin crawl even if just for a moment. 

You guess you have to find virgins now? The manual said you were responsible for bringing your Master food, and you couldn’t deny the fact that bringing breathing, thinking people to a house to die didn’t make you feel good. 

Wilbur hadn’t asked you yet anyway. 

Maybe your virgin blood, you wince, can be a kinda, last resort, though it may get you into some hot water, mainly death. You let out a heavy sigh.

You used the daytime when you were awake to escape the sometimes oppressive atmosphere within the house, to feel sunlight on your skin. Usually, you just walked, ran errands to get more hydrogen peroxide and cleaning supplies. Today, though, you decided to go out to eat and use the last of the money left on your card to treat yourself to something that wasn’t ramen. 

You didn’t go anywhere fancy, another destination within walking distance, a place with bar food and a welcoming enough atmosphere you could sit down and feel normal for a moment. You didn’t expect to see anyone you knew and yet it seemed fate had other plans for you. 

“Y/n?” someone asks and you can’t help but turn to face them. “I thought that was you! I haven’t heard from you in like, forever! Have you fallen off the face of the earth or something?” Jess, a former coworker, you guess, and friend, asks in jest, a light laugh under her words as she invites herself to sit in the empty chair across from you. 

"I-," you stammer, flashes of burying bodies, scrubbing the red from wood and carpet. “I got a new job, keeps me really busy,” you say with a sheepish smile. She flashes a look of concern for a moment but it quickly passes. She doesn’t ask you what the job is, doesn’t even bother to pretend to be interested in your life beyond how it affects her. 

She talks about her new boyfriend, first dates and happiness you don’t have. She goes on and on about her dead-end desk job like it’s the most interesting thing in the world like you hadn’t lived it with her as her coworker just a few weeks ago. She details new clothes she bought, insignificant facets of her life, that by the time someone is asking if you’ve ordered you are quick to speak up. 

“I was actually just about to get going,” you say, mouthing an ‘i’m sorry’ to Jess, someone you are starting to think really isn’t a friend at all. You hurry out, savor the sound of the bell on the door, and find yourself realizing you don’t miss the mundane all that much. What were you before you were this? An office worker with no significance? At least helping people get killed made a difference in the world. You shook your head, condemned yourself back to that damned house, and sought out Wilbur when he finally woke. 

Maybe you were craving some sense of company, maybe you wanted to feel useful, or maybe you were lonely. 

It didn’t matter. 

Jared found you first though, sat beside you on that couch as you waited for Wilbur to exit his room. The sleazy vampire, an adjective that felt fair to you, was quick to run his hand up your leg. You yelped, moving away. 

“Jared,” you spat and he shrugged, sitting back. 

“Worth a shot, you looked contemplative,” he said and you rolled your eyes. You noticed his collar was dotted in what was likely blood. “You could be having a much better time with me, I’ll turn you in a month tops, doesn’t that sound nice?” your expression screws up into distaste as he speaks. Maybe that is what usually worked, dangling immortality like a carrot on a stick, but you weren’t all that interested in being a vampire in the first place. 

This was Jared's routine though, to savor those precious minutes where it could be just you and him. He would beg you to be his familiar, make you squirm just a little bit, then either walk off or Wilbur would appear to dissuade him. He was definitely your least favorite person (vampire?) in the house. 

It’s then that Wilbur calls you up to his room, and you flash Jared a quick feigned apologetic smile. Then you are quick to escape him, to bound up the stairs, and blink at Wilbur as he invites you into his own room. 

“I’d prefer if you waited inside when I am about to wake up,” he says as the door closes, his gaze intense yet words reminding you of waking up a child almost. 

“Oh, I just thought you would want space,” you mumble. 

“I’d prefer not actually, besides then you don’t need to see Jared just as he crawls out of his coffin, he has horrible hygiene… and manners that I can not apologize enough for,” you thought of Jared’s bloodied clothes and nodded, though you only later realized it might have been an attempt to make you laugh. Wilbur looked nice, even when he was just waking up like this. The back of his hair was slightly flat, it made you resist running your hand through it to fix it but that seemed rather unprofessional, your fingers twitching at your sides. 

“Do I look okay?” Wilbur is asking, all of a sudden he is just in front of you. It’s not abnormal for him to ask but the proximity shakes you. 

“Master, may I… fix your hair?” and the more you look the more the curly strands seem out of place, and it was your job after all, to be his mirror.

“Yes, go ahead,” he is quick to say. You carefully card your fingers through his hair, electing to ignore the way he can’t even look you in the eyes as you do it. You step back and admire your work but he remains stunned for a second, rebooting. 

“All done,” you smile “Do- do you have tasks for me today?” you ask with a tilt of your head and his eyes linger on you.

His mouth opens and a second later his voice comes out stilted, “it’s only a few things today.”

You think to yourself, perhaps vampires need a lesson on what few means, you’ve noticed that whenever the vampires in the house say the word like Wilbur had, it was never really what they meant. Or even what you thought they meant. Maybe eternity takes a toll on their senses. You’re not entirely sure but whenever Wilbur means a few tasks, they last you until right before he goes back to sleep, ready to skip the sun and spend the day in his coffin.

Sweep and mop the foyer and living room, wash and fold the laundry, tend to the flowers outside with his name staked next to them, assemble the furniture he ordered from the internet. Such as those are never few and are never small tasks. You don’t mind it too much, especially when it could be worse. (Like finding new, virgin, bodies for him to drain, surprisingly, he hasn’t asked you that in the time you’ve been here. You’re almost curious. Then you remember how easily it could’ve been you and you’re content to remain in the unknown.)

Kicking your sneakers off and slipping into your garden boots, you step into the moonlit garden, purveying the area and searching for his name. Surprisingly, he hadn’t asked you to tend to the plants till now but it’s a new day and you’re not burying bodies, so you don’t mind at all. The dirt crunches under your boots, and you pass through all sorts of green and glowing plants, noting that most of them are under Techno’s care. You half-wonder if the vampire himself tends to them or if he has Roger to care for them, only to find the answer yourself. The man with pink hair, pulled off of his shoulder and a hat to top it off, the intense gaze from before, seems smaller in the loose shirt and plain pants, boots like yours. 

“Wilbur has you out here?” He asks, his voice lilting as he turns from the plants to look between you and the house. You nod. “Then you know to only work on the ones with his name?” You nod again. “Okay. Get to work then.” Somehow, despite being one of the more impressive people you’ve ever met, the interaction seemed… awkward. As if he wasn’t expecting to talk to anyone then. Can’t be helped. You suppose if you ever became a vampire you’d probably be just as much, if not more, awkward.

Your steps halt when you find the shed and while you’re not proficient in gardening you can still find the watering can and gloves. Slipping them on, you reach for the can when you recognize a smell emitting from the open hole in the top. You stand still, wondering if your nose is finally broken or if your brain read the signals right. You don’t gag so much as you wonder about the mechanics of it, recognizing the metallic and iron smell of blood in the can. With it being so dark, had you not smelt it, it would’ve been hard to spot the liquid.

Wandering away from the shed with the blood-watering can, you make your rounds, letting the blood coat the leaves and the petals, getting the soil a bit. You remember the instructions from the tiny book he leant you, remember the ardent stare you held as his fingers only grazed the top of your knuckles. You feel the memory in the heat of your cheeks and you sigh, moving on and on to the next plant.

Techno doesn’t talk all that much, and you’re not sure what he does with his plants and if he uses the blood too, but he doesn’t bother you like Jared does and you’re grateful for that much.

If you’re being honest, the tranquility of the night, combined with the gentle walk through various plants you’re sure would kill plenty of other humans in a heartbeat, and Techno, as silent and unnerving he might be, aids the peace you have carefully built in the last hour. Though after watering the plants, you’re not sure what to do, the vampire doesn’t offer advice and you can tell the book would erupt in flames if you tried talking to Techno unprompted. With that in mind though, it was a lovely chore, you take your time with putting the can and the gloves away, and seeing how it was left unlocked when you found it, that’s how you left it. The dirt pads your footsteps and Techno nods as you pass by, with a thought that maybe the outdated book had any wisdom to it at all. (Ahem, it did and it pertained to you, your face burns at the memory of both the conversation with Roger and reading the damn thing.)

You open the door, surprised to find the youngest of vampires standing with a curious look on his face. “Since when did you know how to garden?” He asks, moving to the side when you mumble pleasantries.

You hold onto the door frame as you shake your feet from the boot and slip into the comfort of your worn sneakers, humming as you thought on your answer, “since he asked me to. Now if you’ll excuse me, Tommy.” You nod your head, making your way to the stairs. He follows, questions falling out of his mouth as fast as you run out of breath walking up and answering them.

There’s a pause in your step as you reach the landing, you assume had there been another creature, not one of the night, following you, they’d crash into your back. Tommy, not particularly known for his graceful air, nearly crashed into your back. He managed to stop behind you on the last step, looking at you with two judgemental eyes and a prominent, albeit confused, frown. You pointedly ignore him. Looking around, you could smell the usual smell of iron. Your master, however, hadn’t woken up hungry.

Tommy also avoided your stare. The few seconds of silence though were enough for him to fess up. He was about to ask you himself but then you kept running away, in his words. And also in his words, he doesn’t have a familiar. Doesn’t need one but gave you the eyes whenever he asked for help.

So here you are, stuck burying another body. You can already see the dark, inky blue of the night fading to something softer. You lug the body into the hole as you think of different blues that matched the sky. Stomping the dirt down, royal and navy, to the beautiful sapphire… after those, you were stumped. The whole time between putting the shovel away and walking the distance to the door, you know, deep in your subconscious the sun was rising but you were so caught up in the names you end up mumbling to yourself, scraping your boots off with the doormat and swinging it open, “chartreuse isn’t blue, it’s like purple, isn’t it?” And in your mumbling and thoughts, you were distracted. Distracted and had let the sunrise blast through the back of the living room. Exactly where Jared had been lurking for the past twenty minutes as he watched you throw the last bit of dirt in.

When you finally shut the door all the way and slipped your boots off, you turn to see ashes spread out in an uneven pile behind you, with the staircase holding three gobsmacked vampires and a slightly pleased familiar. You, without the better knowledge that the ashes could've been someone at some point, had outwardly groaned and loudly complained. “You guys, I just- I literally swept and mopped this area an hour ago!”

“That- that was Jared.” Tommy pointed a finger at the ashes.

Your brows furrow. “No it's not, come off it. He’s in his room, sulking ‘cause I wouldn’t talk to him.”

“He’s not going to be talking to you anymore, it seems.” Techno says and Tommy’s cheeks inflate as he tries to hold back puffs of laughter.

“Wilbur?” The vampire himself didn’t say anything, looking far too pleased with this outcome. “Wilbur, tell me I did not just kill Jared.”

“Technically speaking—” a smile grows on him, far too genuine and pretty for someone finding a rather morbid scene, “— he was already dead when he turned into a vampire.”

[artful-aries]

Arguing With Them (Tighnari, Diluc, Beidou)

I am back after a hellish week in the trenches of corporate offices. I don’t even make enough to be considered white collar but I sure do gotta pull out the stops for corporate America. Anyway cooked up something after an idea I had on my business trip, enjoy!

Tighnari

It’s actually remarkably easy to get into arguments with him. Not that every argument is extreme or anything like that, but he is prone to bickering with those close to him and you are no exception

Arguments with him could spark over anything; whether he’s lecturing you on how best to take care of yourself while you traverse the forests of Sumeru, complaining about the mess you may or may not have caused in his herb supply, or on the rare occasion debating over philosophical beliefs

Tighnari is incredibly stubborn and won’t back down from a conversation that threatens to spill into an argument no matter what

This isn’t to say that he’s arrogant and thinks he’s always right, but he is extremely strong willed and isn’t willing to concede on many things, especially if they involve someone’s health or morals

His irritation will be blatantly obvious; his eyes are sharp as knives, and his ears and tail twitch involuntarily as he listens to your side of things

Even when extremely irritated with you, Tighnari is never going to raise his voice or stoop to insulting you. Though he disagrees with your point of view, the argument will never escalate more than a heated debate. The Akademiya gave him loads of practice with discussing topics with people he vehemently disagreed with in a classy way

Because of this, you will never feel threatened by his anger. Even when his hands clench or he takes a deep, agitated breath, there is never any negative energy emanating from him that would make you feel like he might snap and potentially hurt you

That being said, he isn’t going to mince his words during the argument. If he thinks what you’re saying is illogical or rash, he will not hesitate to tell you as such

It’s not that Tighnari doesn’t care about your feelings, because he definitely cares when he sees how much his words hurt you sometimes. Tighnari just would rather be completely honest with you rather than holding his thoughts back

Dishonesty eventually leads to seeds of doubt, which bloom into flowers of resentment. The last thing he wants is for your relationship with him to dissolve simply because he chose to not tell you everything that he was thinking

Because of the debate-like structure of arguments with him, it’s actually easy to deescalate the situation, especially if you tell him that his words upset and hurt you

This won’t make Tighnari change his firm opinions about whatever you were arguing about, but he will definitely take the time to reassure and comfort you if you’re upset. Couples don’t have to agree on everything, so he doesn’t want you to feel like arguments with him mean that he’s done with you

Diluc

For someone with a Pyro Vision, arguments with him start out very cold and distant. He avoids eye contact, adjusts his coat or his gloves almost obsessively, and his tone is flat and to the point

You will likely be the one to start arguments, more than likely criticizing how little time he spends with you, or perhaps how secretive he is with some of his whereabouts He still hasn’t found the right time to admit that he is the Darknight Hero

In an effort to not make you worry and to try and smother the flames of his own guilt, Diluc will initially be a bit dismissive of the argument, or try to avoid it entirely

He knows it isn’t the healthiest way to deal with things, but it’s quick and it works for a time. The guilt in his chest grows each time he does this, but he doesn’t know how to come clean

It’s not until you corner him and demand that he address your concerns that the fire is brought out of him. He can’t help but snap back at you, the pressure he’s putting himself under as well as the stress of disappointing you coming to a head

When you flinch at his unintentional booming voice, Diluc is crushed with even more guilt as he takes deep breaths to calm himself. The last thing he wants to do is lose his temper, especially toward you

He will make a point to keep his voice calm and quiet as possible so he doesn’t appear as intimidating, asking you to forgive him for lashing out

From there, the argument deescalates into a normal conversation about how you have been feeling about his behavior as of late

Diluc will do his best to address all of your concerns, or at least explain why he can’t waver in his choices or opinions

He isn’t the best at conveying how he feels, but he makes a point to hold your hand throughout the entire discussion. It serves as a silent promise to always stand by your side no matter what hardships come up

Beidou

Fights with her occur at a moderate amount, and are often very loud. It’s not that she’s yelling at you, per se, it’s more that she’s just yelling because of how much she’s feeling

Arguments are rarely over something frivolous unless she is drunk, but her drunken arguments can be laughed off and quelled simply by putting her to bed. When she’s sober, arguments tend to be more serious, and a recurring topic of discussion is safety; both yours and hers

It’s almost like you two take turns being concerned for each other. This time you’re scolding her to be more careful with her and the crew of The Alcor, and the next she’s practically breathing down your neck for going to Luhua Pool without her escorting you.

It’s obvious that you two care for one another, and get very heated when the other party is too stubborn to listen

It doesn’t take long for Beidou to be loudly lecturing you about how you need to take her with you when you travel since you can’t fight, or insisting that she knows exactly what she’s doing and that you don’t have to worry about her

Your lecturing irks her because she feels like you don’t trust her, and vice versa. It’s a never ending cycle

If you were to react poorly to her raised voice, Beidou will immediately apologize and try to lower her volume, but in turn she will be frantically pacing back and forth as you two argue. She has to let out her emotions physically somehow, whether it’s projecting her voice or moving to work out the excess energy

She does her best to not make you nervous as you both argue, but she understands that her energy when she’s irritated or upset isn’t always ideal. If it seems too much for you, she will leave to get some air, telling you to wait for her until she comes back

After having some time to cook off, Beidou will come back with her usual calm, unbothered demeanor and apologize for getting so worked up.

From there, she’ll listen patiently to your concerns and voice her own, making sure to give you small reassuring smiles as the two of you sort out your troubles

You drive her nuts sometimes, but she cares so much for you and doesn’t want to let you go for the world

[l8ncestroll]

opinions of racing point lance 🙏🙏🙏

- Yes.

- I have so many opinions actually and now I’m gonna subject everyone to seeing them 💕💖💞

- Okay I’ll start out with the obvious because it really is just soooooooo obvious whenever you look at him…

- BFFR We all know I’m talking about the absolutely phenomenal long hair, I feel blessed whenever I see a picture

- I’m not sure exactly why but it brought out his eyes so so well and I am NOT complaining

- He definitely knew it too, he’s a confident guy and I can 100% see him using it against his shy girlfriend

- “my eyes are up here”, “look at me baby”, phrases he would throw around in innocent conversations, probably in public, silently knowing not only that looking into his big baby-cow-esqe eyes set something alight in his girl, but also that his words were undoubtedly reminding her of similar things he’s said in much less innocent moments, he’d enjoy watching her squirm and not being able to say a thing.

- “stop hiding your pretty eyes, angel”, as his shy girlfriend covers her eyes with her hands in frustration when they’re just messing around trying to bake in the kitchen. Her ignoring him because really it’s all his fault that her recipes aren’t going to plan because he keeps eating all her ingredients. Him grabbing her wrists and pinning them down against her sides to try and get her to look into his eyes, except she keeps just staring at the floor and avoiding his gaze . So really he had no other option but putting her on the counter and looking up into her eyes. “I’m sorry baby I didn’t think you needed the chocolate chips, next time you’ll tell me when I’m getting in your way, yeah? I’m sorry baby ” And her nodding sulkily because as much as she can’t disagree with him when she’s looking into his big eyes she’s still disappointed. Maybe he’s started feeling a little guilty for ruining the baking, or maybe he’s just looking for an excuse to have her right there on the counter but he’s definitely offering to make it up to her. Her still sat on the counter and him stood between her thighs, one hand tracing shapes on her lower back and the other holding the back of her neck to keep her looking at him. “I AM really sorry babe, how about you let me make it up to you, hmn?” Whispered quietly, his breath tickling her face, him smugly watching her realise what he’s implying, “Are you gonna let me make you feel better?”, he’d prompt, head tilted like a curious puppy, seeing as she was too surprised to respond to his first lewd offer. The second she nods he’s running his hands up and down her exposed thighs, slowly tracing his way up under her cute little skirt and slowly pulling her lacy panties off, quickly shoving them into his pocket before pushing her back to lean on her elbows and leaning down to leave wet little nips and kisses all over her inner thighs, Enjoying having the freedom too leave all the marks he wants because no one other than him would be seeing them. When he decides he’s teased enough he blows cold air over her slick cunt, smiling and watching her twitch. Finally, holding her hips down against the counter he places small kisses up and down her slit before going in, alternating between sucking and repetitive movements on her clit and fucking her lazily with his tongue. He looks up, hands wandering up her torso to pull her tank top down just far enough for her breasts to spill out obscenely, and he realises she has her head tilted back in pleasure. He pulls away as she makes a noise of despair and looks at him questioningly. “C’mon keep your eyes on me baby, watch me take you apart yeah?”. Once she nods and looks down at him he goes back in, this time licking and sucking a lot more enthusiastically, spurred on by the eye contact. As she gets closer to the edge he pushes two thick fingers inside of her, torturing the spot inside that he knew would send her insane. Right as she’s about to cum she screws her eyes shut tightly in pleasure… and everything stops in an instant. “If you look away I’m gonna stop baby” he says as she whines desperately “if you want me to make you cum then the least you can do is watch me do it” he says, lips glistening with her wetness. When he finally puts his mouth back on her clit and starts stretching her back out on his fingers, she’s super careful to maintain the intense eye contact, not willing to be edged again and just wanting to cum all over her boyfriends face. He can tell when she’s close by her breathy moans turning pitchy and ragged and makes sure to keep going exactly as she likes, feeling proud of himself when he feels the telltale clenching and twitching of her orgasm. He keeps going until she’s pushing at his face and pulling at his hair to get him off her before collapsing limp on the countertop.When he finally lets up he pulls her into his arms against his chest and just holds her there for a minute. “How about round two in the shower?”

- oops

-idfk what happened there I got carried away drabbling

- maybe this is my sign to start writing actual good shit and put some effort in again 🤷🏻‍♀️

- or maybe it’s a sign to shut up who knows

- as always feel free to send me anons I love talking to people honestly idc what

- sorry anon I had no clue how you wanted me to respond to this but I think it definitely wasn’t like this lol

-Jesus Christ i’m a yapper

-Finishing up with some cute little pics because THIS BOY? Who wouldn’t want some pics💕🫶🏻💖💞

[brainrawt]

Layla 6x08 - my reaction

I am so happy to see Layla in therapy, and appreciative that she got such consideration in an episode about Billy giving letters to the other kids. 

I love that we’re asking questions! I love questioning what we watch, dissecting it, I love exploring character dynamics and relationships, and we have so many in this show. I love talking about my favourite couple clearly, so I love them talking about it too. We missed some conversations surrounding their engagement given it was a surprise proposal and then there was a time-jump to them just getting on with it, I'm pleased to address it now. I mentioned this in my 5x20 posts that I wanted to hear from them about their engagement, and honestly a lot of the doubts I had back then have kind of been relinquished now.

“Why did you propose to me?” So earnest, so vulnerable. Layla is trying to make sense of everything and she’s building ground up. “Do you love me more than you loved her [...]” We know so much about how Layla struggles to put her trust in others and accept their love and she did watch Jordan be in love and fail at marriage once on top of all the other relationships they've seen and been in, she needs to KNOW why this will be different (I asked for exactly this!). Not just want it to be, think it will be, but KNOW it will be successful. The whole conversation, Jordan was so tense and scared of what she might say, he’s scared by her questions because the answers, “Because I love you, obviously” “Layla I fell in love with YOU”, "We take care of each other", are very obvious and clear to him, but not to her. Depression can cloud your perspective and thinking. Asking the questions is so active, not passive, not avoidant, just such an effort on her part and so much progress in my opinion.

We’re REALLY sitting right up in there with her in this therapy session, exploring her struggles thoroughly and step by step. We’re not getting a snippet or a reference to it, we’re getting all of it, what a privilege. She’s so vulnerable in this space. Layla goes around as this mini grown-up, running businesses and handling herself, but it’s not true. She really is just that little girl, this flashback brought back that depth to her. A scene of her discussing her mum in therapy? Come on. SOO head-on, SOO true, so so honest and deep and so fucking good. What we’re learning about Layla, it’s new and different but all makes sense and adds to her and reveals what she carries at all times. She lost her mum, but she inherited her depression, and that journey unfolded after her death so only had memories to reconcile it all with. “What if I don't want to remember?” She is stripping all defences. As for the memory itself…

TRUE CINEMA!!!!!!!!!!!! BEST SCENE EVER ???! SO GOOD SO DEEP and genuinely so profound. I was holding my breath throughout the scene, the way Greta portrayed the aching sadness was phenomenal. I saw Jordan and thought it was just a parallel to their present. When the camera pans to Layla, I’ll actually never forget it, I jumped. In this one scene, we’re seeing Layla past AND future. We’re seeing her true memory AND her own fears. She is present in the one scene in TWO pov’s, she is the baby girl AND she is the mother. A masterpiece. How much is she in control right now? Is she able to manipulate the memory at all? How much is Layla and how much is Monica? How she breaks when she says “Not for her…” makes me question. Before she even understood what depression means, Layla has felt like she couldn’t keep her mum alive, and has carried that all this time. The dad says “Layla needs you.” Yes childhood Layla needed her mum, current Layla needs future Layla to show she can get up, future Layla’s daughter needs her, current Layla still needs her mum! It’s grief and anxiety and so many other things. I am just in shock watching this, I never expected them to reach so deep inside of her, she's baring her whole soul to us! And obviously I’m giggling a bit at seeing Jordayla with a daughter hehe. Truly a standout scene to me, the best I can recall seasons and seasons.

She has clarity, she has selfdom and reflections and convictions; you look at me like that, you are not my dad. The convictions are real; you’ve seen all of me, we’ll be okay, I’m not my mum. She knows, I don’t want to be like my parents, I want to marry you, I need time. She has asked all the questions and done the digging and building and they have led her back, to here, to Jordan. Such clear communication in so many words, not only apologies and reassurances but laid out feelings and thoughts! I've been looking forward to this. 

The way Jordan says “I sprung the proposal on you” is unshakeable. He’d take back the happiest moment of his life to save her any pain. “The thought of marrying me made you (that) unhappy?”, “You don't want to marry me.” Him saying the hard words, it’s part of the out. He’s letting her off from having to say it. He’ll even break his heart himself to spare her that much! A minute ago he was joking about should he be worried that she has all those breakup phrases, and a minute later he is in all seriousness offering to break their engagement, for her. He'll give her any length of time, he’ll let her go entirely. 

The episode has left me feeling a little insane. Time to digest it a bit more slowly and I’ll probably be back with more to say haha. 

[acourtofquestions]

Welcome page/post thx 2 A Court of Questions by @lavendarneverlands

This is my (secondary/“side”) blog for my #FirstRead (& adoration of) the Maasverse! — But take this as a heads up: I mix up the two pages frequently😅😂 sorry in advance for any confusion! — Think of this page like Potterless (except probably not half as cohesive & good as the podcast lol😂). I love enjoying the series with the fandom so please feel free to reach out to #ReadAlong or #ReadWithMe (it’s why I’m on Tumblr; no one I know reads these). 🫶 also check out the tumblr community “@maasverse-first-readers” for more :-)

Header image: Blue illusion Art & Profile pic: Beth Gilbert Art

LET’S FANDOM ABOUT IT

This is a Maasverse related blog, thus it does discuss the series & spoilers (depending on where you are in the books) HOWEVER I try to keep up to date with spoiler warnings (often in the form of: #tags, red, 🚨, or what I call the “more” bar of safety) & I hope it makes it accessible for all readers! I also really try to keep this blog inclusive & friendly for everyone (any character, any ship, any reader, any person… or fae I suppose too :-) & use proper content warnings (as I greatly appreciate that in others too) … so thank you!!

As I am unfortunately human here’s a lil up-to-date guide for what is & is not discussed thus far (& as I also try to avoid spoilers for the books I haven’t gotten to yet)

— I have read ALL of ACOTAR,

— I have read ALL of Throne of Glass,

— I am currently reading my way through “CC” Crescent City; & now on Crescent City 3

Be warned: I’m a rambler of posts & content posting, and autocorrect is my true enemy😂🤣 p.s. I’m new here & always trying to learn!😊 I do my best to do my due-diligence and properly credit. And use TW whenever I can (as I need it in my life too <3

I leave most “reaction” posts up from my first reads. Opinions of course change over time! I try to edit & update (& or re-tag) but some stay old.

Currently my favorites and majority are:

ACOTAR

I love the Archeron sisters (Feyre is dear to me, I think Nesta is an important kind of character, and I look forward to more Elain in what I’m calling ACOTAR 5&1/2)

THE Valkyrie (Gwyn esp.)

I can go any which way with the Elriel/Elucien/Gwynriel/Gwynlain/etc. “debate” (like I said though I’m here for all fans and prefer to keep it generally positive/friendly; we’re all just enjoying stories & art😊).

I love Feysand (sry Tam-Tam😅 I struggle with him)

If you want to go give some ship love @gwynlain you can also find me there :-) 💕 because yes I am that fandom obsessed I have a side page for the side blog😂

TOG

I adore Celaena & Aelin (for posts on both I tend to call her “Aelin Sardothien” cause I love ❤️‍🔥 fireheart ;-)

Rowaelin is my fav ship (though you will find it was not an immediate love for “bird-boy”😂 from page 1😅) the “Team Chaol” force was once strong long ago (I don’t hate him now, I just like them as friends) though I’ve also shipped all the ships at some point🤣 (I like a lot of fandoms and have a very “SQUIRREL!” personality😅😂 so I do make a lot of references, despite this being my Maasverse page) there was a time for Dorlaena & of course Samlaena too

and Sam Cortland always deserves more (I love him & am still sad😅). My beloved "Assassins of Adarlan"

As will Dorian ALWAYS be beloved as a character,

I think in another life I’d like to be Yrene

Lysandra is a favorite.

Manon and the 13 are everything to me… till darkness claim us & beyond…

I still want a spin off with the cadre

I could make this list really really long because these books are one of my all time favorites

— Abraxos & Fleetfoot (TOG) & “The House” (ACOSF) as characters hold a candle to no other. —

“CC” Crescent City

I finished House of Earth and Blood “CC1”

I finished House of Sky and Breath “CC2”

I am currently reading House of Flame and Shadow “CC3”

I love Baxian! And LIDIA CERVOS IS AN ALL TIME FAV FOREVER!!! (Day x Night are my fav ship in the series aside from Fury x Junoper obvi)

I love my kick-ass gals; Bryce rocks, & of course the pack of devils & Danika (her & Bryce’s friendship meant a lot to me), Fury x Juniper (their my bb’s).

SERIOUSLY I LOVE DANIKA

Syrinx is a fav, I love all the animals!

I wish I liked Hunt more, I don’t hate him, I’m just kinda meh?.. and slowly evolving into dissapointment

THE CROSSOVERS

Thank YOU “fellow dreamers” for welcoming ME! into your feed & Maasverse!

& to my fellow “first time readers” Welcome to you too! 💕

+ All you old-timers THANK YOU for your loving guide notes & support (for ALL THE FANDOM FEELS😂)!

… And yeah… Hi! Much love❤️💚🩷🩵🧡 all are welcome!!! This blog does NOT discriminate & is a safe place to enjoy fandoms (because it’s about enjoying stories!) regardless of race, nationality, ability/disability, gender, sexuality, belief, age, etc. Feel free to message & tag😊 + if it helps in the matter of communicating:

I identify as she/her (please always feel free to tell me your pronouns if you like :-) 🏳️‍🌈Bi🩷💜💙 LGBTQIA+ if you wanna call me by something other than my blog name/names you can call me Lila (short for Delilah), I’m a Zillenial (21+) I primarily speak English (though I’m usually fluent in Sign, & Czech, working on refreshers & learning Spanish), Chronic Illness advocate. & I look forward to enjoying stories with you!

And there’s nothing left to say but…

— LET’S FANDOM ABOUT IT —

[avareiahgt]

Hey!

I've been out for some days but trying to work out something.

I've been struggling with prompt number 8 so hard. I've rewriten it four or five times and it never ends up as I want. That's because I've thought so many times about beach day that now I can't keep up with all of those ideas.

So here I am, writing number 9 hoping tomorrow I'll be enough inspired to end the previous one.

Sorry, but I let you here a short fluff prompt.

×××××××××××××××××××××××××××××

GT JULY PROMPTS 2024

DAY 9: WARMTH

Warnings: a little fearplay, alcohol, possessive behaviour, mention of sex, cursing

Alec wasn't one that liked drinking alcohol. He sure had stamina and a strong metabolism for it, but was so unusual seeing him so warmed up. I knew this because he was way more talkative when drunk, also breath felt like a dragon hitting me.

He gave some trembling steps into the bedroom, blue eyes looking for me. At some point, they spotted me on the desk, reading some giant magazines the best I could.

The first thing wrong I noticed was the slamming door when he arrived, he was always so quiet. Second, the loud steps and hits on the walls where he was trying to hold into something. The last one, the way he was going straight to me without a single warning.

The table was at level with his hips, a bit underneath. I took some steps back while watching how he came like a bullet. Well, more like a massive bomb.

When a hand came looking for me, I held my breath and ran towards the pile of books that were stored at the background of the desk. My foot tripped over a wire and I almost fell. But I didn't so I kept fleeing from him, looking for a hideout or a escape.

I could feel the ground shaking as he gave the last step, then the desk moving like an earthquake was happening. I peered over my shoulder just to see he was standing there, supporting on one hand on the table, the other dangerously close to me.

That was my mistake, to look at my back, 'cause I ended up avoiding some drawing materials with a jump only to face a dead end. Back pressed to the wall, I faced him. Well, his hand, which was the only thing I could see as the shadow engulfed me, making me feel so powerless.

-Don't! Please don't!- I managed to plea

-Shhhh- he ordered me to be quiet.

-Alec, please...- tears spreading around my face, sobs contained.

-Nothing is happening- he said with his usual calm, although his voice was slower than ever-. You were here so alone, so cold. You shouldn't since you are so sweet, Hanna. Why are you like this?

His hand treated me with such gentleness, but it was quite clumsy. Two fingers held my hips and his thumb made the way up to my face, peting it. He was so focussed on not breaking me that he almost lost his feet.

Still, my heart was racing. Oh my... He was so freaking drunk.

-I can't see you where you are standing now- he told me, but didn't move me. Then he repositioned his arm and I was finally able to look at his face again. He was widely smiling, eyes locked on me.

It took all my efforts to pat one of his fingers and try to trust him. "Come on, one foot after the other". My head was rumbling and my back hurt because of the tension. But a step happened. Just one, trembling and scared.

He stopped lowering himself and stood straight. I guess one step was everything he needed because both hands cupped me up without warning. I let out a cry as I was going up, up and up. He had never treated me like this. Like I didn't have a choice or opinion.

-I knew it, you were cold. Lucky you I'm hot right now- my fear mixed with embarrassment as I interpreted those words in an adult way. Face red, I didn't have words. Surprisingly, he seemed to notice the confusion because some blushing crept to his dark face-. I didn't mean that... You see, not in a sexual way... I wouldn't.. fucking hell. I'm not that kind of hot, not that I have some kink or something... I was talking about actual heat.

That was the first and only time I heard him rumbling, tongue tangling and so damn nervous.

-I... I... Please just...- had no words left and even didn't know what I was trying to say. Did I want him to be hot about me? Did I want to be put down?

-Seriously, I don't know what I'm doing but whatever happens I think I will regret tomorrow. That's tomorrow's Alec problem, anyway.

Then he kissed me. More accurate to say he kissed my whole body and curled his hands over me. He kissed me for whole ten minutes before heading to bed and made me sleep on his chest like some kind of amulet, hand as a blanket.

It actually was warm. I also wanted to die of shame.

Next time I would love to be asked.

[ninjaturtlecosmo]

So me and @spideyladman have this IF role play going on on Discord, and it features my OC Star, and her relationship with Art Teacher, and one time we both talked about a scenario where Ted (the name we gave the ice cube IF, and he's a huge asshole in the RP, lol) has this hidden stash of naughty magazines hidden somewhere in his room, and he gets scolded by Blossom (who I headcanon to not have a very high opinion on these type of magazines since she was created in either the 50s or 60s) for having these magazines, in a manner similar to that one Diary Of A Wimpy Kid scene where Rodrick got scolded by his mom for having a magazine like that xD

Blossom: And what do you have to say to all the women of the world for having a magazine like this?

Ted:..... I'm sorry, women.

But anyway, when talking about this, we also brought up how Blossom likely discovered this because Art Teacher found one of these magazines, and he was just plain confused on what the fuck he was looking at xD Why? Well, in our RP Art Teacher originally belonged to a young trans girl named Ashley (who is Spidey's OC), and she's 13 during the current setting of our RP, whereas she was 8 when she created Art Teacher.... meaning that in the RP Art Teacher is one of the youngest IFs living among everyone at Memory Lane, and we both joked about how because of that he's probably super innocent about some topics xD However, we're avoiding adding anything too suggestive in our RP, so I'm going to present to you all this skit of how I imagine Star handling this knowledge xDDDDDDDDD

CW: Suggestive scene Incoming

Star:........ Wait..... Art..... You don't get what this magazine is for? *holds up the magazine belonging to Ted that Art Teacher found*

Art Teacher:........ Not really..... Is it to advertise bathing suits? But...... why are they all posing like that?..... And why is one of the models sitting on a motorcycle in one of the pictures?......... Why does one of them have bunny ears on?

Star:........................*takes in a deep breath to mentally process what's happening right now*

Later at the bar

Star:*having some drinks with Gummy and Blossom*........

Blossom: Star, why does this bother you so much? So he's never looked at nude magazines, I honestly think that's a good thing.

Star: You're old enough to be a grandma, Blossom, of course you'd think that. You boomers freak out at anything if titties or "tallywackers" as you brits call it are shown.

Blossom:................. I had one midlife crisis last year before you got here, do not make me have another one.

Gummy: Seriously, why does it bother you so much?

Star:...... Because it's another reminder of how much older I am than him, for one. I was created in 1990, and Art....... Ashley was 8 when she made him, so he was made in 2018, and....... Ugh...... I don't know...... lately some of the others have been calling out the so called "age gap" between us and it's driving me nuts...... Even Robot called me a cougar the other day...... But..... well, at the end of the day, all of us IFs are still technically adults..... and what adult looks at a fucking playboy magazine and thinks it's for advertising swimsuits?????

Gummy:..... Everyone's different, Star..... He probably wasn't exposed to that kind of stuff before he got here. I mean.... when you were both together in Dekalb, did you..... well, you know, try to take things to a certain level with him?

Star:..... Well.... one time, yeah, but...... Well, he wasn't comfortable at the time since we had only been dating for a few months, and he immediately said no. I guess I never tried initiating that sort of thing again cause I wanted to wait and let him decide he was ready...... and now it's 3 years later since Rachel and I left his and Ashley's neighborhood, and I find out he's never been exposed to a playboy magazine before.

Blossom:....... This may sound shocking coming from a so called "boomer" like me, but believe it or not, some people just don't care for sex. Did you ever think of that?

Gummy: Well, we don't know that....... I mean..... it has been 3 years, and you're still both working on rekindling your relationship. Why not talk to him, or..... well...... hey, sometimes a grand gesture of seduction can do something..... why not try that, see what happens?

Blossom:....... Gummy no--

Star:*immediately widens her eyes as an idea comes to mind, a grin forming on her face*

Later that night

Art Teacher:*sees rose petals leading from his art class to his and Star's bedroom*....... Why are these petals here?..... (thinks: Oh god.... Star, what have you done now? )...... *slowly follows the petals before reaching his door, taking the know and pushing it open*

*He turns on the lights in the room, and is immediately presented with Star laying on her stomach in a suggestive pose while giving him a seductive look on her face, wearing a short silk dress. Petals cover the whole floor while candles are alit around them to fill the air with a sweet aroma, and the record player is on as it plays "Love" by Kendrick Lamar*

Star, talking in a soft sultry tone as if she was trying to mimic Jennifer Tilly: Well hey there, Art.... I wondered when you'd get here. I almost thought you wouldn't show up~

Art Teacher:*eyes are widened in confusion as he looks around the room, a bright blush covering his face*....... Star.... what is all this?

Star: What do you mean? *slowly gets up from the bed and approaches him, trying to pump out her chest as her gown is exposing her cleavage* I just put this all together cause.... well, all the hard work you've been doing with your art lately, I just wanted to do something special for us tonight~ What do you think? You like it?

Art Teacher: S- Star, this is......! *backs away a little, overwhelmed by all of this* Its...... if you wanted a date night, I think this is all a bit much.....!

Star:*reaches behind him to close the door, so it's just them* Is it? Or maybe it's just because we've never done anything like this before~ Hey..... You know how I've always tried opening you up to new experiences, right? How sometimes we've just gotta get out of our comfort zones and just live a little?

Art Teacher:*eyes widen more, at this point backing away more* I- I get that, I do......! It's just..... I don't really think right now is--

*As they're both so distracted by the other, they don't notice as one of them ends up knocking over one of the candles on accident with their foot, setting the carpet floor ablaze*

Star: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Art Teacher: !!!!!!!!!!!! *screams in terror as the room starts to be engulfed in flames*

*Cue to later when they get help from a couple of firefighter themed IFs, the both of them finishing putting out the fire in the room before it could get any worse, while Art Teacher and Star stand outside to watch along with other IFs who heard the commotion, Star looking embarrassed while still in her silk gown, while Art Teacher stands there, clearly aggravated by the whole ordeal*

Firefighter 1: Well, the fire is out now. But it'll need a few days for everything that was burned to get fixed or replaced, so, you two will need to sleep somewhere else for a while.

Star:.......*smiles nervously at Art Teacher* You want to sleep in the music room?

Art Teacher:....... Sleep, and only sleep. I'm not having sex with you. Not because I don't love you, but because I don't want sex tonight. Got it?

Star: Yeah.... Yeah, I got it. Sorry..... Won't happen again......

[transmogrified-in-the-void]

Hey 18-20 year olds? You’ve only just started the hardest part of growing up: learning how the hell to do that and how to be an adult. And yeah, I’m in the same boat, here’s some things that have helped me so far

- a friend who is older than you

My best friend is 7 years older than me, and he’s been able to give me so much advice on personal philosophy, how to work on personal issues, etc.

- a friend who holds you accountable/is very honest with you

having a friend who will take you aside and tell you “x thing you’re doing is actually making y hard/unfun/stressful/etc.” is more valuable than yes men friends. These are the friends who will question life decisions if they seem to make you unhappy, in the pursuit of making sure you’re exactly where you need to be.

- learning how to make accountable apologies

Here’s how I structure my apologies now, and I’ve had not only good reactions and conversations afterwards, but I’ve had to use them in various ways. “I’m sorry about x. Y was happening, and instead of doing x thing I should have done z thing. Again, I’m sorry.” It not only has removed the loathed “but”, but it also allows for explanation and a plan on how to avoid it. I will also sometimes add “I’ll try my best to do z thing” if I know I’m going to need some time to fully erase the mistake if it was a habit, but in general that helps a lot.

- start trying to find who is a small dose person and who’s a large dose person

What is a small dose person? For example: I know someone who I can only be around for maybe an hour when with other people before I become irritated by their presence. Is it their fault I’m irritated by them? No, and they’ll never know I am. Because I’m only around them for around an hour once every few months. That’s small dose. It’s the “you’re not a bad person I just cannot be around you for long periods of time”.

- if things you read on social media/the internet make you emotional, restructure how you spend your time

Here’s a really hot take. For those who were tuned in for the dungeons and dragons drama, I’m about to tell you guys something crazy. The draft that was leaked was actually incredibly lenient (I can’t remember what it was called haha). How do I know this? I could tell I was getting a little heated and sent it to a friend who knows way more about that sort of stuff and asked for his opinion, and he told me about other examples of it that were more harsh but not lambasted. If you read a headline or a post or tweet and get up in arms, take a step back and take a breath. You don’t have the time to get emotional about every little thing, you’re too busy growing up.

- make friends or acquaintances who don’t believe the same thing as you

My best friend is a centrist who leans more right than left. I am more left leaning than he is by a good amount. We both have very enlightening conversations because of that. Here’s the funny thing, I do hold some right leaning beliefs anyways because that better supports the area I live in. I don’t want the government grabbing the land around me because they’ve proven to be incompetent. I’m fine with looser gun control because there have been times where mountain lions just. Appear in my city. We have an overpopulation of wolves right now. A few other ones I don’t feel like sharing. My friend has changed how he views certain issues and so I have I because we talk about what we disagree about. If they respect you, they’ll debate but not argue

- not everything is about you

Building off that last point, not every counterpoint is an attack on you. It can feel like it, because you’re still expanding the telescope you see out of into two working eyes (I’m still getting there too), so being able to say to yourself that this is either a) bigger than you or b) not about you at all can help you get through more conversations more levelheaded

- you’re in puberty

Final thing: your body is still a hormonal war zone. Emotions are heightened, thought processes are everywhere, you are still growing up. Give yourself time. And grace. And kindness.

[xeroscribed]

So, uhhhh...

I broke

Just like that, huh (definitely not typing rn to try and hold myself together 🙃)

I

Hmm

Fuck

Yeah, there have been signs, and [I really should smoke more] it finally came to a head.

"You're making yourself upset?"

"If I'm hearing wrong, I must be senile/I should go and get my hearing checked."

"Oh, so I'm the reason your life is so bad, am I?"

Etc.

Etc.

Sigh

Well [breathes], I understand my tension, my stress, my inactivity

No, it is not all her.

No, I did not tell her this

I'm kinda just finally realising it

This voice I've been fighting, that's been slowly creeping it's way back into the drivers seat with me lacking awareness of how significant the impact

For a few nights running, early this week, I struggled to sleep. Jerking awake as I dozed off at the sudden incomprehensible rage I heard quietly blaring in the back of my mind, as if in real time.

And I've no idea what words were said, or when. Something like a disembodied voice. An echo of a memory of a moment lived so many times over they've blended to one passage of indistinguishable vitriol hurled over decades with reckless abandon. No words to be placed but the undeniable cadence of the maternal howl. [Gone the wonder of why I excel at recognising voices].

.

The agonising pleading with the girl in the mirror, only increasing; I know that you're in there, so why won't you listen?

The constant convincing still so unconvincing

.

The frustration at the name in the bubble of notification. The constant exhaustion. The tension. The waning of patience.

There, you see...

I'm feeling okay.

Breathing somewhat steadily

Declining heart rate.

I'm straight.

So there was a moment. And-

A less evolved version of me would think my ma did it on purpose to force interaction or just to be petty.

Because after days on end of getting it right, she somehow gets it wrong. And gets me. In a gesture way off.

But...

I'm above that line of thinking and it helps me not

Fuck it.

Either way, interaction was had. A question asked. A tone misperceived. A flame thrown back. Which, at this moment - too hot to handle. But I do. Unsteady-like until I catch myself and...

I calmly highlight, yet again, this problem I'm having [we're having, but i digress]

See

Ffs

It's so frustrating

Yes, this is gaslighting.

But being gaslit by a person who doesn't actually understand that they're doing it.

Who is so trauma bound that they would swear blind if anyone were doing the harm it is you.

For being tense like you are. For avoidance. For snapping sometimes. For addressing the issue.

Here. I have to lead with understanding first. I have to moderate her emotions and redirect her to the topic at hand and manage her way of thinking and reiterate my point and do it all calm, don't dare raise your voice and-

Fuck

I have been thinking and writing in this stupid lyrical manner. This sing-song nursery rhyme bullshit.

Last night, for some reason, recollections of past traumas. Of hygiene. Of solitude. Of lessons in abandon.

Things I am still ashamed of.

But wish to speak on. Because there are so many of us. Hidden. Getting by

Getting on. Battling our demons.

Some, like me, still living with them. At least... that's what she thinks. I don't share the opinion.

I said I broke. It was... incredibly emotional and vulnerable and-

You can't show your pain because it's seen as a tool to make them feel guilty and feel like the fool so they flip it back on you without a care what you've said coz it's easier to claim they'd be better of dead than to take a step back and to listen instead.

I heard you I heard you. Then exaggerates context. Exaggerates impact. Inflates the intent and warps it to suit their ego.

.

This is the matter at hand. This is the plainness of speech. This is the intent.

Do not take to heart the things you think that I meant.

Do not ruminate on your past wounds or fears of your failure [the ones I'm beginning to share].

Do not put on me all the harm of past aggressors. Of the attitudes I've shed. Of the fallacies in your head.

.

"Well, I can't help it, can I!?"

I ask you, who can?

If not you than who?

Not seeking apology. Don't want you to feel bad.

Just asking you to see me as I truly am.

See the work I've put in. See the intention within. See the years of the patience and commitment that's been repairing this ship, drawing us closer, trying to establish something vaguely familial.

.

Yet you see me. Villain. Who hates. And spits sin. Who lies and denies you your right to feeling.

.

Here am I sharing this ache in my chest, this knot in my gut, and this pit in my head.

"It's always about what I'm doing to you!".

I've had an ear worm lately: "I need you, too". Still don't know what it means. Don't think I'm meant to. Not ready yet.

.

You ever notice when one has just formed?

"You're upsetting yourself/You're getting yourself upset."

Because everything is always repeated. They want you convinced.

That's the moment I realised the futility of going further. I'd said what I'd said. Clarified. Reiterated. Took my time. Found my patience.

I stopped. Composed myself. Said goodnight.

Again: Please remember the words that I've said. Please do not focus on what you think I meant.

A final attempt to beg. To plead. That she'll hear me this time.

Coz its taking it's toll. On my soul.

Oh yeah, that's the revelation.

See

That voice is winning. My energy waning. My faith fading. My hope withered.

And instead of knowing I'm good and great, I'm trying repetition hoping the thought integrates.

Like it had before.

But I'm battling two voices.

Both equal in strength.

One cultivated by me, with unending resistance.

The other, nurtured and festered inside. The one I seek to hide.

I

Had manage to quell it, pushed it to the side.

I was golden. Confident. I'd finally found pride.

And now both the knowing and the fearing have taken up residence. Battling it out for the number one spot.

And as I look out, I see the crowd forming.

The faces of friends. Some clear as day. Some so distant.

Some I can hear. Some I just get a glimpse of. But what carries through; words of love and peer wisdom.

That's one side. With the sun. With the me fueled by loving.

.

The other. Barren. Cept for one figure.

One I try not to witness til she toes the line to the sunny side. A gift yet a rarity.

Typically, she resides in the shady seats but stays squinting. The most notable impression of the twisted expression.

Some days are more dreary. And I can't see her clearly. But her voice steady travels on the wind and whips through me.

.

I watch these two battle it out - the crowd cheering.

But that voice doesn't shout. It whispers so clearly.

And the wounded looks through you: I know you can hear me.

.

Those supporters, so loving, well their chants are drowned out. And the two are left standing in a haze of pure doubt.

Neither sure. Both uncertain. Of which one will win.

Sometimes I think it's a matter of time.

Eventually the clock runs out and the stands will be missing their most loyal voyeur.

All that will remain will be sunshine and well wishes.

But its not really so dire. I suppose.

I recognise now what has it's hand round my throat.

May I not amplify it.

May I stand by the sunny side and know that clouds pass and find my place in the rain.

Let it wash over and all that malarkey.

So much has been said. So much I will probably read again and find lacking sense.

But you cannot tame a beast you have not named and I've named it. I know it. And I'm bound to defeat it.

So fuck it.

In the meantime, keep it going.

Find peace. Things will improve. It's just trauma. Not you.

You're better for knowing.

[moe-oh]

KARGAN CHAPTER 3 - SCRIMMAGE

Author's Note: Here's chapter 3! I hope you guys are enjoying the series so far! next week will be Ophelia's short story, giving you guys a bit of back ground on her! all main players in this story will be given one so please look forward to it! Enjoy!

WC: 1,306

TW: poorly written fight scenes and mention of throwing up.

The next few days were incredibly mundane, the most I did was walk down to the beach to sit and watch the waves. So now, being in a gym sparring is welcome. My side hurts and part of me wants to vomit. Each swing Theo sends at me I block, and I can barely manage to swing back. Even if I could, I have a feeling it wouldn't end well. Theo sends a few more punches before he hits my side. I let out a choked gasp and crumble to the ground. Theo pauses to help me up. 

“It’s like the bacta does nothing to help you” he holds out his hand for me to take. 

“It would hurt a lot less if you didn't punch my injuries” I take his hand, “it's not fair.” 

Theo pulls me up and steadies me, “Enemies don't care about fairness.” Theo smirks and helps me walk over to a bench helping me sit. I lean against the wall and wince, holding onto my side trying not to throw up. I take deep breaths in, trying not to let the pain become worse than it is. Theo sits down next to me and hands me a canteen full of water. 

“At least tell me you haven't forgotten to shoot?” he smirks as I chug the water.

“I usually only shoot, haven't used my saber since I was fourteen” I get the canteen down leaning against the wall, and glance at him, “A blaster is pretty much all I use now.”

Theo nods and sighs, he fidgets with the hem of his shirt as he stares off into the distance. The silence covers us in a blanket of awkwardness, most of our interactions, since Ophelia brought me back to Pabu, have been mostly shrewd in sarcasm or trying to understand what happened to me when I got my injuries. So in my opinion, the fidgeting is warranted. 

“You're right though.” he glances at me.

“About what?” 

“Me hitting your wound, it's not fair” he looks back at the wall, “it was dirty.”

“It was” I nod, “but if we’re being honest I would have done the same thing.”

Theo chuckles, “You would, wouldn't you?”

I laugh a bit and shake my head. This feels normal, this feels like before I left him and Ophelia. We were both lost kids, just trying to find a home after our homes were destroyed. The difference is Theo found his family and I abandoned mine. I sigh and glance at him.

“Do you think that she’ll make me go?” 

“Who?” he tilts his head, “Ophelia?”

I nod.

“Oh yeah, she’ll make you go” he folds his arms, “she seems to have made her mind up anyways so there is no way you're getting out of it now.”

I grumble and sigh, Ophelia would make me go and she would definitely would make my life hell if I chose not to go. 

“Great.” 

Theo nudges me with his shoulder, “You’ll stay on the ship, no use in making you fight when you can barely throw a punch” he smirks, “unless you did forget and are playin' the I’m hurt card.” 

I roll my eyes at him and smile, “You must think I got soft huh?”

“What if you have?” 

“I haven't.”

“How would I know that” he tilts his head, “you’ve barely talked about your time after you left us, you’re truly an enigma Zitara.” 

I shift a bit trying to avoid the statement, he’s right. I don't want to talk about my time on the mantis now. My leaving the mantis is still fresh, and accepting why I left is not something I plan on doing anytime soon.

“Am I that big of an enigma?” I raise my eyebrow, “I would think you’d know how to read me, Theo.” 

“I probably wouldn't be able to if I wanted to.” Theo looks back at me, “You’re not an open book anymore Zi.” 

“Neither are you” I frown, “You work for who now? The rebellion?” 

“Doesn't matter.” Theo looks away from me, “All that matters is that I'm helping change things.”

I hum, a song I’ve heard sung many times. It’s an idea that many rebels have, the idea that if they do one single mission the whole war could be won. Cal had this mentality, and so did a handful of the rebels we worked with also thought like that. I shake my head and stand up.

“Sure you are.” I roll my shoulders.

Theo raises his eyebrow, “you don't sound convinced.”

“I’m not.”

He nods and crosses his legs, leaning back onto the bench, “I thought that you would be the first one to be a rebel, Don't the Jedi want to save the innocent?”

“I’m not a Jedi.”

“Obviously.” Theo scoffs. 

I narrow my eyes and tilt my head, I can't believe this. I always omit the fact that I was a Padawan before I set out as a mercenary, but Ophelia knows, and by proxy, Theo knows. We sit in silence after that, both of us trying to ignore the awkward feelings bubbling up. Theo stands up and walks over to the weapon rack, picks up a bo staff, and points it at me. 

“Come on, if we’re not going to talk about it let's at least fight instead of pretending nothing is wrong.”

I raise an eyebrow, “I can barely move.”

“Get up.”

I sigh and stand up, trying to force the agony down as I move towards Theo. He tosses the bo staff to me and I fumble it a bit before I manage to catch the thing. He grabs another staff and positions himself defensively. I take the hint and lunge toward him, I swing the staff around the back of my body and wack his staff, trying to hit but he's too fast. In the blink of an eye, I’m on the ground, the butt of his staff shoved in my face. Pain shoots up through my body, I suck it in and grab the end of his staff and pull with all my strength. Theo comes tumbling forward, I don't know what I was expecting but somehow his falling on me did not cross my mind.

I hiss, as the pain becomes unbearable. The point is to push through, I know it is. The fight won't end until one of us is bleeding, or god forbid, I start crying. I swing my leg up to wrap around his waist, hooking it to pull him to the ground. Instead of that though, Theo regains his balance and shoves his forearm onto my chest, effectively pinning me down, and making me lose the skirmish. I tap his arm, I can't keep fighting anymore. Theo pauses for a second and shakes his head. 

“You sure you're done?” He raises his eyebrow.

“Theo, I'm going to throw up on you” I push on his shoulder, “please, everything hurts.”

Theo sighs and climbs off of me and holds out his hand. I reach up and take his hand trying to steady myself and will strength into my legs as I push up off the ground. I groan when I stand up and Theo grabs my arm to steady me. He looks me up and down, I'm assuming to check for injuries and finishes pulling me up.

“Again, it's like bacta barely affects you.”

“Oh shut up.”

Theo shrugs and lets go of me, “We leave at 0500, take some pain meds before you get to my ship okay?” 

I nod and roll my shoulders, unsuccessfully trying to rock the pain out of my bones. 

“Zitara, get some rest” Theo places his hand on my back, “Don't try to do everything at once, okay?”

“Yeah, I know I will.”

….

Rest does sound good.