#i am personally in the camp that her music is fun but not that serious. like lyrically ok but not exceptional most of the time ig

[halfdeadwallfly]

genuinely every post i see about taylor swift on here [or anywhere if we're being honest] is such a mind numbing train wreck to observe. like somehow we can't just be normal and it's baffling if i'm being honest

[notafraidofredyellowandblue]

i don't wanna cause any more drama but have you read the new Spiegel article? About the friend of the daughter of another bandmate :/ and being 15 gosh. I don't know what to think anymore honestly.

Serious post alert, and it will get long too...

Please skip or block it as you feel needed. This story will not be graphic (at least i will try not to), and let me state up front that nothing bad ever happened to me personally, nor that i know of ever happening to people i know.

---

This ask i got right after the Spiegel article was published, which was right before the Brussels concerts. I deliberately didn't answer it at that time, because ofcourse the timing of the media wasn't a coincidence and i don't play that way, and i wanted the final concerts to be just about music, the band, and fun.

In short, the story is about a lady, now 28, who 13 years ago was (and possibly still is) best friends with a daughter of a bandmate of Till, even was in a band with her, she joined the family on a vacation in Germany, and met Till there. They talked, had some drinks, and kissed. Later they went beyond that. Her father found out and ended the situation. When she was grown up she reconnected with Till and they again had an affair. Two bandmates of Till are said to have known about the situation.

The story is under an alias, so if you feel that it's anonymously, i don't argue with that, but realistically, those of us who follow the band a little, know which bandmate and daughter would seemlessly fit that description, and although we don't know the person by name, i'm sure for people who are in their personal circles, it won't be a secret who it is. This is my assumption at least.

The story also does not involve any criminal act, because having sex at that age is legal in Germany (with consent, but consent can be given by anyone over 14 i think).

And ofcourse this is just the one story, no comments from Till, his lawyers or the band have been made, so at this point it is 'a story' and not more than that. We have heard similar stories or shards of it in the fandom over the years, but these too were never substantial. So what was it about this one...

Thing is...this story didn't shock or surprise me. It didn't have me rolling my eyes and thinking 'how could that even happen'.

And maybe more than anything my initial reaction surprised me. So i also took these last days to consider that, and figure out why that was.

-------

I think i figured out...and it's a couple of things, and none of it really have to do with Rammstein...

For those who don't know, i am rather older than the average tumblr user, and as this may be relevant in this case (generational gap?) i will state again what i usually say "i am younger than most of Rammstein (but not all)". What also may be relevant is that i grew up in west europe (netherlands), a very liberal country, sex wise (certainly when i grew up).

Firstly, different from some reactions i read on social media by fans (i don't read much about the Rammstein allegations, but i read some about this one), i am not mortified at the idea of a 15 year old having sex. When i was in highschool at 14/15 i had several friends who had adventures with guys on the weekends when they all went camping. I happened to be a rather naive and unexperienced teen, but my friends sure weren't (i learned much of my sex-ed from them, let me tell you). There boyfriends were usually teens themselves, although usually a few years older, but that sex happened was clear. Also, in the teeny magazines i read at the time sex was on many of the 'sent in questions' that the magazine answered.

(the Rammstein guys are about my age, i think when asked when they first had sex, they all mentioned being in their mid-teens, Richard a bit younger at 13)

I didn't have the sex myself as a teen, i stayed pretty much naive, unexperienced and unremarkable for a long time (maybe i still am), but also, i never did things *because* others did them, peerpressure never impressed me. If i didn't want something, i didn't do it (still don't). I didn't drink alcohol either as a teen, even though that too was pretty common for other teens.

In my early 20's i still didn't drink, still didn't have the sex, and was still naive, and unremarkable. What i was, was being very active in a youth movement (bit like 'Scouting' but a different one). Our youths varied from age 6 to 18, so where we as staff were in large part in our twenties, some of the teens in our groups were almost our own age. Some of the older youth also helped out occassionally as staff, and i have known many wonderful, active and dedicated teens (15, 16, 17 etc). Ofcourse when they helped we always made sure that there was an adult present, that they were never alone responsible for a group, but as there was sometimes only a few years between us, we did not see a problem in them having a beer with the rest of the staf when they helped out (just one, we always made sure no one would overdo, but we definitely weren't alcohol-free).

What also was part of the movement, was that we as staff had courses to teach us skills on things to do with our groups, you know: making fire, frying food without a pan, setting up a camp with tents etc etc. Staff members who were more experienced would be the tutorsand these courses were great fun, camping out in the woods, getting all grimy, long nights at a campfire, singing songs.

One of the tutors who was often involved was a guy who must have been in his mid 30's (maybe near 40) at the time, a great guy, very charismatic, well respected by everyone, because he knew his stuff and explained things very well. There was a great vibe about him, people loved hanging out with him, making things, building stuff, making better campfires. Everybody in the youth movement knew him, and valued him particpating in a course, a real people's person. What we also all knew of him was that he was a ladies man...he regularly had a new 'girlfriend', and even more snogs with not official girlfriends. He didn't flaunt it, but rumours were many, where he was seen heading of to a tent at the end of a campfire night with a woman. We all knew it, women informed eachother about that fact, so anyone getting involved was aware of his reputation.

Like i said, we as staf were usually all in our 20's at least, you had to be 18 to be official staf and to particpate in courses, so i never heard about him getting with younger women, but i realise now that with him being, let's say 35, a 20 year old, may have been a significant age gap in itself from an outsider point of view.

And for me being the naive, unremarkable person...it was amazing that this guy, when i met him on my second course, remembered my name, came up to talk, gave me a 7-up (remembered i didn't drink). Between planned tasks, he taught me as a sidenote, to make a fire with rubbing too sticks together (a pretty timeconsuming way, and not on the official courselist, we had easier ways to do so), which was a fun thing to know. Everybody always wanted to be near him and chat, but if he ended up next to me, he chatted with me too (that never happened to me normally 😊).

I never made a move, and he never did either...but realistically...if i had been interested in 'more', i don't doubt that he wouldn't have turned me away for a night in a sleeping bag..

Years later, i was already away from the movement because i had a busy job, there was a huge reunion, of people who had been staf in the past 20 odd years. So i went, just out of nostalgia, over 300 people attended and the guy was there too (with how much he did for the organisation, not a surprise), and believe it or not, he still remembered me, and we had a nice chat, before others came to talk to him and swooped him away.

I have lost touch with that crowd by now (work, also moved away), but if i met him now, and if he'd remember me 🌺 i'd love to have a bit of chat. But how many women he snogged or shagged back then...no idea...

----

When i read the story in Der Spiegel, unlike what i see many say as it being unbelievable...i totally get it. I was early 20's, but naive, more naive than my schoolnates at 15. Here is this guy who is easy to talk to, and makes you feel he's interested in what you say (me! never..). I didn't make a move, he didn't either, but had i maybe had a bit to drink, i might have (i sure crushed on him a bit).

And meeting up years later and being remembered, that makes a person feel good. Add a bit more alcohol...well...

Let's say i get it.

I hadn't thought about the guys in over 20 years, but when i read this, i did..

I've been wondering if a guy like that should feel skeevy to me now, with what i know these days, and how much moral has changed. And i don't know.

Do i think now someone should have intervened and have that guy not attend the courses...i think no...like i said, all adults, and we all knew his ways. But is that still an acceptable excuse nowadays. I don't know that either.

Should the guy have kept his youknowwhat in his pants and just had a steady girlfriend, possibly...but i never heard he forced anyone, ever. He just...had a way about him, women were as interested in him as he was in them.

So that's where i am...

If the story in Spiegel did happen, i wish it hadn't, but i'll react to it, when that's confirmed.

Until then, i'm still gathering my thoughts...and try to figure them out..

[inquisitoradaar]

feel like i need to elaborate on musics love shape. long post ahead bc god there is so much explaining that needs to be done here. the situation is Intricate and Dire. also spoilers for balding gate or whatever

i went in without any idea who i was gonna romance but then i met gale and was like ok. i think this is the guy. and had made up my mind on it until wylls introduction where i was like oh fuck hes so hot but i couldnt change my mind id already promised myself id romance gale.

anyways. the party ends up being music + shadowheart + gale + wyll for a while. this is not because of preference but bc i literally managed to miss astarion (i went to the bottom of the hill hes on and then said out loud to myself 'nothing else here' and went back in the nautiloid.) and lae'zel (saw the two tieflings that caught her but didnt see the cage and decided to avoid conflict). i eventually swap out shadowheart for karlach when i meet her (it was besties at first sight for me) and then get told by some friends who r also playing that im a fucking dumbass and completely missed astarion and lae'zel (id already saved the grove by this point so LMAO)

i go back to the crash site, grab astarion, then use a scroll of revivify on lae'zel bc shes dead in the mountain pass (whoops). theyve both missed literally everything. i go to camp and astarion immediately reveals to music that he is a vampire. awesome. theyre also both charlatans which is a lil funny to me. i add neither of them to my party bc by this point im extremely attached to gale wyll and karlach and music has rlly high approval w all three of them.

now in truth the love shape was already in the equation bc gale is still not over mystra. music is unclear as to whether or not this affection is still reciprocated on mystras part (and tbh so am i . i havent finished act 2 yet ok) but when they shared a Moment in the weave gale enjoyed it so clearly thats also happening. so we have a love triangle going on. this is fine and manageable even if music is not a big fan of the whole the-guy-im-into-has-a-bomb-in-his-chest-bc-of-his-ex-who-he-still-loves thing.

we get to the underdark. i have a long rest. astarion has smth to say. in-game it has been two days since i finally grabbed him from the crash site (has he just been waiting that entire time for someone to walk down that path so he could stab them?). cutscene plays out, he wants music to tell him hes pretty, music responds w 'gales more my type', and astarion makes a comment abt how hell have to work on himself if hes to 'catch up w the competition' um?

so the love triangle is now a sort-of love square. could be just a lil silly fun joke and i think of it as such (at least when ignoring the meta (thats another story)) until i get to act 2 and have a long rest in the shadow-cursed lands. and astarion says to music smth like 'were kindred souls, were walking down the same path, we should take over the absolutist cult and rule the world together' WHAT IS HAPPENING. what coded declaration of love bullshit is this. music and astarion barely even know each other.

so, great, love triangle is now officially a partially unreciprocated love square. but then. but THEN. to make matters WORSE for ME PERSONALLY. having another long rest in the shadow-cursed lands and a cutscene starts to play. wyll is dancing and so music joins in (naturally, theyre best friends w wyll (literally, they have maximum approval from him) and a BARD) and then things start getting. quote. "intimate" and i go oh no i have to put a stop to this bc things have started getting more serious w gale. and when i tell wyll that they should both step away from this he looked so genuinely heartbroken it made me feel so horrifically sad.

so the partially unreciprocated love square is now. even worse. a love shape of no real design. with music, some random loser tiefling bard charlatan in the middle of it all. gods help them

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

Name: ❄️🦊

I’d like a romantic match-up please.

Pronouns: she/her/they

How I see my personality:

Flighty, head-in-the-clouds, irrational but full of ideas and energy. I don’t bother on small details and tend to focus on the bigger picture more. I get in trouble a lot at work/school due to this carelessness, but even if I tried to focus, I’m just not the type to overthink and overanalyze things. I do things as they come, sometimes at a whim.

As a result, I tend to float on by in life. I don’t like to stay in one job/location too long, nor do I really have long-term relations (friendship wise). I have more casual acquaintances than close friends, but this doesn’t bother me that much as I’m also quite private despite my open eccentricities.

I’m actually an introvert, and although I don’t mind socializing with others, they have to be the ones to approach me first. I like to think I’m a good judge of character, even with my airheadedness, I just get someone’s general ‘vibes’ after meeting them for the first time.

How others see me:

Probably more on the eccentric side, definitely very disorganized and messy (on the outside). Maybe a little detached or uninterested in others. Not the most mature or grounded person despite my age. Full of energy, enthusiasm, and ideas, but terrible at utilizing said energy and ideas productively.

Hobbies and things I enjoy:

Traveling, cosplaying, anime and manga, light novels, manhwa, video games (emphasis on RPGs, gachas, and otome games), horseback riding, camping, musical theater (both performing and watching), ancient mythology (especially Greek, Roman, Egyptian, and Mesopotamian legends), medieval history, gothic architecture, and classic literature. I’m a nerd in both the academic and weeaboo senses.

Things I hate:

My appearance, insects, cold or rainy weather, hunger

What I want in a relationship:

Someone who’s not afraid to take the lead, who can be playful yet guide me when needed. A fun relationship that can start out casual but turn serious later on, but not TOO serious (no marriage or kids please).

Relationship no-no’s:

Someone too controlling or demanding. A person who doesn’t respect me—physically and emotionally. Someone who is too into PDA and open affection, as I am very uncomfortable with that.

How do I show affection:

Ranges from light teasing, to full on (playful) bullying, depending on how close I am with the person. I tend to act more cutesy and spoiled in a relationship, but all behind closed doors. Nicknames are something I like to give too.

How do I want to receive affection:

Gentle touches behind closed doors<I say this alot because I’d honestly prefer the relationship to be private. If he can cook, that’s a bonus. Words of affirmation and encouragement when I’m feeling down.

Miscellaneous:

Sun sign-Virgo

MBTI-INFP

I’d prefer the main students only, thanks again!

Hi there, ❄️🦊! Let me see who- Oh, here he comes!

Ruggie Bucchi

Ruggie respects you before anything else; valuing your boundaries. He wouldn’t demand nor control you, and would make sure that you are comfortable with him courting you. But courting may be too formal since it would be light and airy. He takes notice, and on days when he sees you down, he’ll reassure you, especially with anything that you are insecure about.

“Hey,” he would say behind closed doors, holding your hand making sure you were okay with this. “I know that this,” he places a finger on your head, “can be shouting at you. But you are you, and that’s pretty great.” He would say that on rough days.

He likes your energy, and thinks that you’re cute; your energy may seem like it is all over the place, but it means that you got a lot going on up there. He appreciates that you focus on the big picture and not get bogged down in the details, and will come out to help you if that gets you in trouble.

Oh? Do you need a bug killer/catcher and a cook? He’ll catch any and all big scary bugs for you, taking this role seriously but still with a humorous air. He’s a resourceful cook and will try to make your favourite dishes even though he may not always have the funds to make you something super fancy; it comes from the heart.

He would like to learn more about your interests; so you say from your world you have an entire pantheon of gods with animal halves? Wait, how many gods are there?!

He would also take you out camping, you two don’t go to the same place twice, travelling anywhere and everywhere… may or may not camp outside of the Diasomnia dorm so you could see the gothic architecture Sebek stop yelling at them, they're on a DATE

He would also read any manga, manhwa, light novels, and classic literature that you mention that you like in passing, so he can see your eyes light up. He would also be down to try cosplay with you, although if you tease him for it you may see him roll his eyes with pink cheeks; he enjoys seeing that playful side of you and likes it.

“Shishishi~ You’re really cute ya know, like an energetic fox."

Hope you like your match ❄️🦊!

As a side note; Ruggie would never expect or ask you to settle down or have kids if it was something that you didn't want for yourself; he would be okay with something more casual, plus he has you, and that's enough for him.

[cookinguptales]

1-2-3-7!

https://www.tumblr.com/cookinguptales/752727268420452352/music-asks-these-are-actually-pretty-fucking-hard?source=share

oh I forgot I did this ummm

sorry all these answers got long rip

1: A song you like with a color in the title

YO LISTEN UP, HERE'S A STORY--

okay look I won't do that to you even though that song slaps every bit as hard now as it did when I was nine.

ummmm serious answer, probably Under A Blanket of Blue by Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald. A few years ago, I wrote an incredibly long WWDITS fic where Nandor went on his journey and Guillermo eventually found him... I didn't finish it; s4 came out and kind of put a damper on all that, but it still has a very special place in my heart, and that was the song that I used for the title.

I had Nandor's first stop be in America and I thought... well, if I had to say one thing in America is really worth seeing, it's probably our national parks, and the Grand Canyon is kind of emblematic of that... So in the first chapter, I made Nandor take this cross-country Amtrak train so he could ~see America~ and he was still really crabby and depressed about Guillermo abandoning him and this little old lady took him under her wing and taught him how to get his frustration out via cross-stitch. I actually made a whole cross-stitch pattern for that fic, haha. But they talked to each other a lot on the trip (she couldn't sleep, so she was always up pretty late) and he learned about her life and the people she'd loved and lost and it ~really made him think~. Then he finally got to the Grand Canyon and flew out to one of the areas where people aren't allowed, right in the middle, and camped out on one of the little plateaus and looked up at the stars and felt monumentally small in a huge world. And I was thinking about that song as I wrote. It ended up becoming a thematic song for the whole fic.

Also last year I listened to it while watching a meteor shower and it was really nice. :)

2: A song you like with a number in the title

Seventeen (Heathers the Musical)

Seventeen (Reprise) (Heathers the Musical)

Ohhh I really like this musical, and Seventeen is a banger. While the original song is beautiful and fun to sing, my favorite line is actually from the reprise, "We can be seventeen, we can learn how to chill, if no one loves me now, someday somebody will."

Because... so much of the show's message really is about the cruelty of youth and pushing through all that to be kind anyway. To find meaningful relationships anyway. And not to allow yourself to become too cruel and too cynical to find those meaningful relationships. You're not unlovable, you're just a mentally ill teenager. And even if it feels like things are untenable now, life goes on and we can make that life kinder for everyone until you do find that place you belong and the people you belong with. :')

3: A song that reminds you of summertime

Hmm. This is more an artist than anything. There's a Japanese singer that I've enjoyed since I was a teenager named Suga Shikao. I think some of his work used in anime is best known, but all of his music is really kinda chill and funky and I really enjoy it. Sooo many of his songs feel like summer. Kind of hot and sticky and slow and laid-back.

Boiling it down is difficult, but I think I'll go with 午後のパレード (Gogo no Parade -- Afternoon Parade), ８月のセレナーデ (Hachigatsu no Serenade -- August Serenade), and uh. June. That last one is about the month but also a person named June, lmao.

(I'm including the kanji because that's how these songs are listed on Spotify if you want to find them.)

7: A song to drive to

uhhhh well I cannot safely drive due to my tendency to pass out at random intervals, but I am a slut for a road trip and I usually end up controlling the music while we drive. My dad and I go on a lot of really lengthy road trips and I play a lot of music while he drives. Some of it's music he likes, some of it's music I like. This is the one I play when I want to make him laugh.

Movin Right Along (The Muppet Movie)

[mthenvs3000w23]

My Two Favourite Topics Crossover: Music x Nature

Personally, music is one of the most important things in my life. I know that sounds dramatic, but it is so versatile and holds value to me for many reasons. I enjoy finding new music, songs I can relate to, and bonding with others over it. Music influences my emotions, my energy, and helps me focus. I could go on for a while about all the reasons I love music, but today I want to address how it relates to nature. 

Growing up, camping was a big deal for my family. In the summer, every moment we could, we would go camping either just ourselves or with extended family and friends. A lot of people look at camping and ask, “why would you want to sleep on the ground and be dirty for a few days?”. Though this is completely valid, my family looked at camping as a way for us to connect together. We become so infatuated with our own daily lives that we forget to reach out to one another. What does this have to do with music? Well, one of my favourite camping activities is a nighttime campfire while my Dad plays the guitar and we all sing songs together. This music in nature empowers my family and brings us closer together. Bringing a guitar outside is of course not the only time music is found in nature. The most natural form of music includes birds chirping, wind howling, and trees blowing. Often when I go on nature walks, I take time to remove my headphones, and let nature’s music make me feel at peace. It is times like these that I feel calm, and am more in tune with both myself and the natural environment around me. 

Music requires inspiration behind it. I think relationships with nature are impactful enough to inspire many songs. A student from the University of Linfield wrote a thesis on The Essentialism of Music in Human Life and Its Roots in Nature. The student describes ways in which composers relate their music to the 4 seasons. She demonstrates how composers convey their emotions that accompany the seasons changing in their own music, or how they perceive one season in particular. Though I’m not familiar with classical music myself, I’d like to share a few songs that relate to this topic. 4 Seasons by Rex Orange County depicts how he feels about caring for someone who doesn't care for him, and how through the seasons though others have moved on, he still has not. we fell in love in october by Girl in Red describes a blooming relationship becoming more serious in October, and the complicated feelings she has about being in her first lesbian relationship. Lastly, in Autumn Leaves by The Walters, the group describes the difficulties in moving on from a relationship, and still being reminded of the one you love as time continues to pass (ie. the autumn leaves fall, similar to the meaning of 4 Seasons). 

A song that always brings me back to a natural landscape is YUKON (INTERLUDE) by Joji. I expect when most students respond to this portion of the blog prompt, they will likely choose a song that has lyrics that resonate with them or songs that they enjoy while they are out in nature however, I choose this song because of its title. The artist, Joji, happens to be one of my favourate artists, and he released this song at the end of summer 2022, which was the end of my time living in the Yukon for 4 months. It is a beautiful song, but every time I see the title, let alone hear it, I am reminded of all the fun I had in the best summer of my life, and how much I look forward to returning to the North.  Linfield University Thesis: https://digitalcommons.linfield.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?referer=&httpsredir=1&article=1005&context=muscstud_theses

[stilldancewithyou]

I'm completely caught up on HSMTMTS and...idk about this season. My biggest issue with season 3 so far is that last season they were all anxious working really hard to make Beauty and the Beast perfect for the Menkies, a high school award show (even tho they decided they didn't care about the awards at the end) and even in the first season they showed all of the kids really cared about putting a great show and making sure it's the best show they can put on and I haven't seen that energy from anyone except EJ and then Courtney in the most recent episode. Am I really supposed to believe that these same kids, despite the fact that they originally came to camp to have fun, are approaching putting on a musical that is going to be in a documentary that will be probably globally streamed on Disney+ with such carefree, blasé attitudes? That they don't care whether it's good or not? This a multi-act, at least 2 hour Broadway musical and it's the first off-Broadway or whatever production of it and they'll be performing in front of Corbin Bleu and the kids aren't worried about that all? Are you serious??? You're expecting me to believe no one else cares near as much as EJ does about the show being amazing???? Up until Courtney no one else had expressed any type of stress or worry about it. Gina was more worried about being good at sports/color war than making sure her first lead role, which will be broadcast on a major streaming platform, is great and that just doesn't go with her character and the excitement she had about her lead role at the start of the season. Every single time they talk to EJ about it and about him being so busy and stressed and not participating in camp they talk to him as if it's just some random, dumb camp production and he shouldn't care that much about it...um excuse me but what the actual f***??? You're really trying to tell me these kids (who didn't even like camp that much in the first ep!!!!) are going all Hakuna Matata and being all relaxed and having fun with these camp activities with no one mentioning the show or running lines or anything. All they cared about in the first two seasons was the freaking shows!!! Where is that energy??? Why is EJ the only person who cares whether the show is a success? Also the last two episodes had no rehearsals or mentions of rehearsals except EJ running lines at prom...when he was talking about how Miss Jenn said "as long as they know their lines you'll be fine" I was like but do they know their lines??? does EJ even know if they know their lines???? there were only two rehearsals and one was mostly reality tv lessons. I guess I'm just confused bc I thought this was a theater camp??? maybe it's just me? am i the only one who is thinking this?

also on a totally different note, idk if it's just me but I feel like there hasn't been that many songs this season compared to the other seasons...like I wanted to see more rehearsals of them singing the Frozen songs together and I want Gina and EJ to have a duet that is an original song, like at least one. Nini and Ricky got so many og songs for their romance and it just makes me really disappointed that that hasn't happened yet. Also give EJ more songs/solos in general. I want at least one but maybe more really good, emotional EJ original song moment. Matt has such a nice voice but they don't want us to hear it for some reason lol

[gensuta]

GAMES WITH TRANS/NONBINARY REP!!

Happy pride month!! I love playing video games so I thought it'd be neat to share the many many games I've played with nonbinary and trans characters >:3

Sorry in advanced I’m copying and pasting stuff from twitter ;v; Also know that many of these games ARE on consoles, but if you buy them on pc/mac use itch.io if it exists. It gives devs more money!!

VALIDATE!!  There's a demo on Steam and Itch.io that you can play RIGHT NOW and also a patreon you can support and I highly suggest it ^o^ It's a lovely VN with several playable characters and rlly good writing

Extreme Meatpunks forever is so SO good omg. It's a VN/mech brawler where u be gay and fight fascists!!! Trans and nonbiney ppl are out here being badass af. The game has cws/tws built into the game ( which i love sm ) Also there's a ttrpg on Kickstarter RIGHT NOW!! 

Another game with nonbinary characters is an rpg called Ikenfell! It was one of my favorite games to play last year and the music and just everything? Honestly so good I'm def replaying it this year. It also has tons of good accessibility features!

ok but i wanna geek abt ikenfell just a smidge more  U DON'T UNDERSTAND 3 OF THE PLAYABLE CHARACTERS ARE NONBINARY <333 The strongest playable character also uses ze/zir pronouns and I think that's pretty epic

Ok so like literally every game I've played by @analgesicprod I've loved 100% And Anodyne 2? Everyone should go play it and I will keep saying it until everyone does. And yes there's a trans character in it <3 Drem my beloved <3  Go check it out!!

Another game studio I love is @pillowfightio !!! They worked on Later Alligator, We Know the Devil, and Heaven Will Be Mine. I highly recc all of them but esp. Later Alligator cuz like just look at Joanie. They're so cool.  

In the game Everhood gender doesn't exist <3 Literally multiple characters are referred to with they/them pronouns and the gameplay is very enjoyable 

 CW LOTS of flashing lights and I feel like there should maybe be more cws but I'm not sure what else to add :l I guess a warning is that Everhood gets into more serious stuff and I'll be honest when the game first came out I had to put it down for several days b/c I just wasn't ready for a lot of that stuff, but I honestly liked the game a lot!

I was debating on adding this bc while I love this game there's some issues. So Gnosia is like werewolf ( or among us if you will ) but more narrative focused with time loops etc. There's two wonderful nonbinary characters and you can be nonbinary HOWEVER ( minor gnosia spoilers. skip past if you want to avoid it) . . . For some reason finding out the AGAB of one of the characters is mandatory and I fucking hate that. It's so unnecessary esp for the world building that's been done. Also tws for the game: sexual abuse / assault, gore ( in only one scene ) (spoilers end) but yeah I still added it because the characters are so neat and strong for the type of game it is and without that bit I wouldn’t feel so :/ abt recommending it. It’s pretty fun ngl

Wandersong!!! The main character is nonbiney and I love them <33 It's such a lovely little musical adventure with such a nice narrative and!! Some of the devs just released Chicory ( which I haven't gotten to play yet ;v; ) but check that out too!!

Bravery Network Online is super fun!! It's a turn based rpg that feels really good and has two characters that use they/them pronouns ( Fel and Reed ) the character designs are sooo good and the game is currently in early access!

I never thought I'd see a claymation point and click musical featuring a nonbinary detective but Dominique Pamplemousse is just that Need I say more?

A personal fav I think about every now and then is Dad fighter 30XX!! Like who doesn't wanna beat up their friend's shitty dad in the parking lot of a dennys?? Also the win music is my FAV

SPIRIT SWAP!!! By @SoftNotWeak !!!! Super chill and pretty game by lovely people with a demo you can play right NOW!! This game makes me want to become a strong magical thembo

More games I’ve played, but am too lazy to ramble about

ROM:2064 ( game is amazing but i got mixed feelings tho bc the og devs aren't getting paid for it I think :/ )

A Year of Springs

Secret Little Haven 

A normal lost phone

Calico 

Celeste

Hollow Knight

Undertale

Deltarune

Monster Prom / Monster Camp

Hades ( all of supergiants games slap btw )

If Found

Here’s games I haven’t played but have heard about

Bugsnax

Diaries of a spaceport janitor

Hustle Cat

Tell Me Why

Our Life

Last Minute Love

Black Tarot

Apex Legends

World of Warcraft has trans npcs :0

Dragon Age Inquisition

Sky, Children of the Light

TemTem

Battletech

Death and Taxes :0

Flicker :0 ( roblox games do count! It’s always cool to see what ppl make in it )

Assassins Creed Syndicate has a trans npc

Verdant Skies

Wandering Wolf Trick ( I love nomnomnami’s games sm but haven’t played this one. Highly reccommend her stuff )

If you have any games you wanna add to this PLEASE please do and I'll add them!! And while you're here please support the Queer Games Bundle going on itch rn to support tons LGBTQ+ game devs financially (including me ) <3 Last little edit for now: I’d def suggest trying to find cws/tws for these games just in case I haven’t covered everything for the ones I did talk about <3

[nochiquinn]

campaign 3 episode 19: how're the fjord moon theorists doing

(I still do not know what the fjord moon theory was, I missed that meme train)

update: preroll music still slaps

djsdlk matt started too early didn't he

travis being a hand model

wait why are liam and laura swapped

oh THAT'S why

sam no

"this is why you wouldn't let us see the copy!"

I'm just fully not looking at the screen anymore. I have a pringles car in front of the subtitles

no wait I lied I looked over in time to see travis dying

POP POP

the tary dice are amazing

"ahhh, too real"

"surprise us" they're all getting lime juice

took me a solid ten seconds to realize travis is wearing a ring pop

and laura too! I know things

laura will never get the name of that place right

ashley's glasses are cute

"does this person still have enamel on his teeth?"

taliesin doing the kombucha girl meme

aw him lonely :(

GOO MONSTER

MOON

oof, premature labor

hey, I recognized dressig's name!

ALYXIAN that's a badass name

liam's eyebrows at "matron of ravens"

[side-eyes That One Part of exu kymal]

lmao MATT forgot the name

you've met with a terrible fate, haven't you

he keeps saying "ill omen moon" like "ruidus" is voldemort

I always want to laugh at extremely location-specific tavern names but everything around here is "peach state [business]" and when I was in dc everything was "capitol [business]" SO

"calm down, DAD"

laudna

"I can't roleplay while you're watching"

liam's eyebrows went into space again

"gingers, man"

"don't you 'just vex' me you fuck"

"VAX stopped aging" sir

it's a valid theory tho!

"what is happening at this table right now?!" "it's the lime juice!"

they just can't not take the piss out of their old characters

I miss caleb's keen mind

"caleb knows EXACTLY what time it is, but liam..."

"cold dead eyes, come here"

"you can't have my eyes" "gotta sleep sometime"

samuel

shroom 20

aww

"I KNOW what I'm about to say"

"I'm so excited to see what your next character is"

"are we getting off-track here?" "probably, but it's fun!"

FROG HARNESS

this is the water plane isn't it

deadlights

baja blast water plane

okay gepetto

"if we ever need to get rid of chetney"

you fish for that backstory laura

chetney's face

wait was it The Tree

"that tree had some serious pollen in it"

WALL KNIFE

sam

marisha's face

orym

"I assist by smiling"

okay that's so smart tho

travis u okay

TRAVIS U GOOD

lil cal

"I've had this club night"

travis

"I love a choking hazard"

travis ur face

am I the only person picturing the werewolf episode of doctor who

not the glasses

"you have a hard time focusing" vibe of the night

OH??

MOON STORM

RED MOON STORM

IMOGEN MOON DREAMS

"and it kills travis"

"he's going to find a werther's"

simultaneously having emotions about imogen and sasha nein, which is A Spectrum

y'all this is gay

[quiet chants of "po-ly-cule, po-ly-cule" in the corner]

sam

moon check

MOON DREAMS

liam are you trying to make me cry

oh good he is. excellent.

gonna fly to la and kick him in the shins

"us around old people"

awww

wholesome creepy

PATE AND SASHIMI

polyratorous

chetney

ur face

"I NEED TO GO TO BED"

chetney

"thinking of the story she told him the other night" oh shit

"I'm gonna regret this purchase" "I'm not! :D" "you're not the one sleeping next to it" "nope :D"

"which one" which one do you THINK, MATT

"it got red! it got red!"

WE HAVE DREAM SIGN

liam sdfjs

bitch out the moon

travis is me

hello 911 laura bailey is murdering me with acting

OH??

don't you call it now matt mercer so help me god

hey what the fuck

it's the other one for all wielders

orym :(

feaRNE

laudna :(

"I could help you"

!!!

fearne

fearne I would kill for you

I'm just picturing all-white eyes with purple lightning-veins

ten years :(

and she's only known laudna for like two, right?

all those years waking up alone

what if she thought if she didn't get to safety in the dream she wouldn't wake up

sdkfjslk

god that's so fucking wholesome I'm gonna fucking die

everybody gives her one and she looks like the most popular girl at camp

"everybody loves the FUCK out of you and we will FUCKING murder a fucker"

orym's little pillbug sleep

the dice support the narrative

oh I like this dark goldy color

my roommate calls friendly players in red dead online "blueberries" bc they're blue dots on the map so every time they say it about imogen I get confused

marisha really ships it huh sdlkfjsl

this is making me wanna play dishonored

"I'm never gonna use it for myself" li am

okay that's a little badass

oh god they're gonna blow up the whole thing

"wind folly" I don't know why that makes me miss dorian

"a very potter musical" draco malfoy vibes

it's ON MARS

he's already so tired of them lmao

I fucking love this

"we should have scouted" "YEAH"

they're trying to get the laser tag rules and the attendant's just 🤷‍

he gets hoa letters all the time

they try to go back out the front door and get attacked by zombie dogs

"massive warhammer" "no armor?" "bard!"

laura

sure jan

trying to clock the cleric

matt: nice try

throw the tanglefoot bag right as they go

that's my prediction for next week

"this is a normal thing that every child did!"

[4stars-uswnt]

Eyes for Only One [Alex Morgan x Reader]

requested by @androgynousmoneyflowervoid: Hey could you write a alex morgen x reader Where reader is new in the team and a couple of players are mesmerized by her. They try to make a move on reader and try to get her attention. But reader has only eyes for one person and that is Alex Morgan.

A group of the USWNT players stood agape on the sidelines, watching you do your pre-training workout. You had taken your shirt off about half way through your workout, leaving you in only your sports bra.

“What are you guys doing?” Alex Morgan confusedly asks her teammates, approaching the group.

“Admiring our new teammate and her extremely fit body.” Emily explains.

Alex directs her attention to where you’re wiping your face, and she can’t help but stare at your body. They certainly had a good reason to admiring, as you were the most beautiful woman Alex had ever seen.

“Why is she working out before training? She’s gonna be exhausted.” Alex points out, tilting her head.

“I dunno, but by looking at her body, I can tell she can go for a long time.” Kelley smirks, nodding in approval.

Alex rolls her eyes at her best friend’s innuendo. “Kel, you have a girlfriend.”

“And? It doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate the female figure. In fact, I’m sure if my girlfriend was here, she’d be admiring (Y/N)’s body as well.” Kelley remarks.

Before Alex can respond, Vlatko blows his whistle. “(Y/N), get over here!” He waves you over to meet the rest of the team. “As many of you have noticed,” he glances knowingly at Kelley, Emily, and the others who had been ogling you, “we have a new call up. Everybody, this is (Y/N) (Y/L/N).”

“Hey.” You wave at the team, smiling. You scan the group, recognizing many of the world-class players, and your eyes fall on Alex, your breath hitching. Obviously, you’d heard of Alex Morgan and seen pictures of her, but nothing could compare to seeing her in real life. Feeling someone’s eyes on her, Alex looks around and makes eye contact with you. You immediately look away, embarrassed you had been caught staring.

“You can get to know (Y/N) later and ask her all the questions you later after practice.” Vlatko continues, holding up his hand to stop Emily, who had opened her mouth to ask you something, before he begins to explain the plan for training and the first drill.

To say that the USWNT had been impressed with your play would be a massive understatement. Your touch on the ball was extremely controlled and quick, and you worked well in the middle, connecting the back line to the forwards. Not only were your soccer skills outstanding, but your strength, agility, and speed were something worth mentioning. By the end of training, you had more than proved yourself as national team caliber, leaving the rest of the team wondering why you hadn’t been called up earlier.

—————

As you slide into an empty seat on the bus, Emily turns around in her seat, already starting the inquisition. “So, where are you from?”

Looking up from your phone, you answer the blonde defender. “LA.”

“Another California girl!” Kelley hollers, and you chuckle and nod.

“Sonny, wait till dinner to question the newbie.” Megan shouts from the front of the bus.

Emily humphs and turns back around in her seat, making conversation with Lindsey.

You slip on your headphones and listen to your music undisturbed for the rest of the ride back to the hotel.

—————

At dinner, you find yourself staring across the room at the forward who’d been occupying your thoughts all afternoon and evening.

“(Y/N)!” Ashlyn calls out from behind you, snapping you out of your thoughts. “Time for your interrogation!” Ali slaps her wife’s shoulder and scolds her.

“(Y/N), it’s not an interrogation.” The older defender reassures. “We just wanna get to know you a little better.”

“Sure.” You nod, as the entire team turns their chairs to face you.

“How old are you?” Kelley starts.

“29.”

That definitely raised some eyebrows, as the team was still curious as to why and how this was your first call up, especially given your talent.

“Why haven’t you been called up before?” Christen asks from next to you.

“I’ve received call ups ever since I was 18,” you reveal, shocking many of the women, “but I’ve never been able to attend camps or actually be on the team. It just was never the right time. I had to take care of my younger siblings, and my family was tight on money.” You tell the team a shortened version of your story so they get the gist of it. “And we all know FIFA doesn’t pay women enough money.” You add on with a small chuckle, causing the entire room to laugh and roll their eyes.

“Well, we’re glad you’re here now. We could definitely use your skill going into the Olympics.” Alex admits, smiling.

You turn to meet her blue eyes and return a smile, nodding in appreciation. “Thanks, it’s really great to finally be here. This has been a dream of mine since I was little.”

“Who was your favorite player growing up?” Tobin asks, muffled by the food in her mouth.

“Michelle Akers, definitely.” You affirm, taking a bite of your own dinner.

“Good choice.” Tobin hums in approval.

“Are you single?” Kelley shouts, earning an elbow to the rib from Alex.

“Kelley!” She chides harshly.

“What? It’s a serious question.” The freckled-woman insists before turning to you, awaiting your answer.

“Uhhh, yeah I am.” You nervously scratch the back of your neck, and Kelley smirks at Alex, whose cheeks tint pink, as she looks down at her lap. You feel your own face flush, as you watch the older forward. Something about this woman captured your attention, making you feel things, but you couldn’t exactly put your finger on it.

“(Y/N), where’d you get that banging body?” Megan jokes, smirking, and you chuckle lightly.

“I guess just a lot of working out and playing soccer in my free time.” You shrug nonchalantly.

“Well, it definitely paid off.” The pink-haired woman winks, as you duck your head.

“(Y/N)! How’d you do that shifty move to beat Tobin down the sideline?” Mal pipes up eagerly.

“Yeah, how’d you meg the nutmeg queen?” Christen smiles, teasing Tobin, and the rest of the team laughs.

You grin at the women around you, feeling lucky to have this opportunity to not only play with some of the best players in the world, but also to get to know these incredible people. You, once again, find your eyes landing on Alex and can’t help but admire how beautiful her laugh sounds and her infectious smile.

After answering a couple more questions from the team and finishing up the dinner, you all head back to up to your rooms.

You enter your room, with your bag rolling behind you, and find that you’re rooming with Kelley, who’s crouched down, unpacking her suitcase.

“Hey roomie!”

“Hey, Kel. I assume this is my bed.” You point to the one closer to the door, as the other woman had already dispersed her stuff on the other side of the room.

“Yeah, sorry. Is that okay?” Kelley stands up, looking worriedly at you.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it.” You smile and nod, reassuring her.

The two of you unpack, shower, and get ready for bed. As you pull back the covers and get into bed, Kelley puts down her phone and looks over at you.

“What’s up with you and Alex?”

“Uhhh…what do you mean?” You freeze and your eyes widen.

“Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.” Kelley says with faux seriousness. “You couldn’t stop staring at her all throughout practice and dinner, even with everyone else’s attention on you.”

“No I wasn’t!” You vehemently deny, ignoring the blush arising on your cheeks.  

“Mhmm.” Kelley raises her brow. “Just so you know, Al was staring at you too.”

You slightly tilt your head, hesitantly peeking over at the other woman. “Really?”

“Yup.” She pops, smirking. “And, she’s texting me right now, desperate to know what I know about you now that we’re roomies.” Kelley sings, shaking her phone.

You feel butterflies flutter in your stomach at the thought of Alex Morgan asking about you.

“I hope you don’t mind, but I gave her your number.” The defender winks.

“What? Kelley!” You exclaim, your eyes widening. “How did you even get my number?”

“I— uh — I might have got it from your phone while you were in the shower.” Kelley winces, bracing herself for your reaction. Luckily for her, you were a chill and laidback person.

You just roll your eyes at your roommate and chuckle. “Of course you did. You trying to play my wingwoman?”

“Well, based on the minimal interaction between the two of you and the incredible sexual tension, I could tell neither of you were gonna make a move anytime soon, so I just nudged you along!” Kelley bursts with an explanation.

Before you could respond, you hear a ding from your phone.

“Oh! Is that Alex?” Kelley jumps from her bed onto the foot of yours and peaks over your shoulder, trying to see the name on your screen.

You bring your phone close to your chest, out of the other woman’s sight. You glance down at the screen and see a message notification from an unknown number:

Hey (Y/N)! This is Alex Morgan. I hope you don’t mind that Kelley gave me your number.

“Well?” The freckled woman bounces with anticipation.

“Yeah, she sent me a message.”

“What does it say?”

You show her your screen, allowing her to read the message.

“I can’t believe she ratted me out. What a snitch.” Kelley mutters under her breath, and you snicker at the other woman.

“What do I say?” You ask nervously.

“Just be like ‘Hey. Good to hear from you’ or something simple like that.” She shrugs, moving back to her bed.

You nod and type out a response.

(Y/N):

Hey Alex! How’s it going?

A few minutes later, you get another message from the star forward, sparking a conversation between the two of you.

Alex:

Good. Just watching some random show Emily put on. How bout you?

(Y/N):

Haha sounds fun. Kelley and I are just hanging out.

Alex:

Nice nice. How was your first day of camp?

(Y/N):

It was amazing! The team’s awesome and super welcoming

Lol the soccer is also fun.

Alex:

I’m glad!

Haha yes soccer is fun, especially when you’re as talented as you are

Your cheeks redden upon reading that message, and you feel like a teenager all over again.

“If you two get married, I better be given credit for setting you two up.” Kelley teases, noticing your flushed face, as she goes to turn off her lamp.

“Shut up, Kel.” You respond, shutting off your own light. “G’night.” You throw over your shoulder, as you turn over on your shoulder.

“Night, (Y/N).”

You reopen your phone and respond to Alex.

(Y/N):

Wow. Thanks Al that means a lot esp coming from you 🥰

Alex:

No problem (Y/N/N) 😊

Do you maybe wanna grab some coffee tomorrow before breakfast?

You beam at your phone, a giddy and nervous feeling overwhelm your body before quickly typing out a response.

(Y/N):

I’d love to!

Wanna meet in the lobby at 8:30?

Alex:

It’s a date! Can’t wait :)

Goodnight (Y/N)

(Y/N):

Night Al

You power your phone off and set it on the night stand. Pulling the covers up to your chin, you can’t help but feel excited for your plans with Alex tomorrow. Today was the beginning not only for a new experience on the USWNT, but it was also the start of a new adventure with a woman who would ultimately become the love of your life.

[goldenraeofsun]

just say yes

The latest installment of this verse... or 5 times Dean tries to propose to Cas.

Dean bites his lip as he scans the menu. What the hell is branzino, and where the fuck are the prices? He flips the flimsy piece of cream-colored paper over, but no dice. 

Thank god there’s a steak listed among the five lone entrees. It’s probably five times his normal dinner price tag, but Dean already made peace with putting off buying that 30 year anniversary Rush album. It’ll still be there after his next pay check. 

Cas eyes him over the top of his own menu. “What are you thinking?”

Marry me.

Dean doesn’t say that, though. He has plans. Keep his trap shut until dessert. Tell Cas he’s going to hit the head. Pull a waiter aside and ask for two glasses of champagne. Return to Cas. Hopefully not shit his pants as he proposes. Drink champagne. Go home and have fantastic engaged sex.

Dean has high hopes for the last part of the plan.

“Dean?”

Belatedly, he says, “The steak.”

Cas hums. “That does look good.” He ducks back behind his menu. “I was thinking of getting that too. But maybe not.”

Dean takes a hasty sip of water. “Get the steak if you want it, man. We don’t go to places like this often.”

“I think I’ll get the honey glazed salmon.”

“Sounds good,” Dean says lamely. He drinks more water. At this rate, he won’t have to fake the bathroom run.

Aren’t they supposed to have alcohol by this point? They’ve been sitting at their fancy-ass table in this fancy-ass restaurant for nearly fifteen minutes.

Maybe he shouldn’t have picked the newest five-star restaurant to propose to Cas. He’s already on edge from the pressure, and the pristine white tablecloth isn’t helping. He can already see five ways he’s gonna stain it. There are several forks in front of him. For fuck’s sake, this place has an actual chandelier. Dean hadn’t honestly thought they existed outside of billionaire mansions and Disney movies.

The live music is nice, though. A sedate piano tinkles in the background, barely audible over the buzz of polite dinner conversation.

Dean catches a glimpse of himself reflected in the dark windows to the street. He looks a little sweaty, but not as nervous as he feels, thank god.

This is stupid. He shouldn’t even be nervous.

They’ve talked about marriage before. They’re adults in an adult relationship, so popping the question out of the blue would go down like the time Dean swept Cas away for a surprise camping trip. Turns out, Cas did not like camping. Which Dean would have known if he had asked anytime in the past four years.

But… that marriage conversation was two years ago. Dean wasn’t ready then; they both weren’t. Cas was still in a bad place with Jimmy and Claire, and Bobby had just died, so they weren’t about to roadtrip to Vegas anytime soon.

Now, Claire can have a civil dinner with her parents, and the hole Bobby left in Dean’s life can go unnoticed some days.

The deal is, Dean can’t chicken out tonight. He already told Claire to make herself scarce. She can sleep at her parents’ or at Krissy’s, Dean doesn’t care, as long as she is not crashing on their sofa when they get back from dinner.

Dean would rather read a hundred plagarized student essays on The Very Hungry Caterpillar than admit to Claire he failed to ask Cas to marry him. 

So, proposal time.

The waiter comes by with their drinks and takes their orders. Conversation is a little stilted, but hopefully Cas chalks it up to Dean being outside his comfort zone in this fancy-ass place. There’s no steady thunk of darts hitting a board or clack of pool balls in the background to put him at ease. Just that lame piano.

Cas makes porn noises over his salmon at first bite, which Dean totally doesn’t get. It’s fish.

“How’s your steak?” Cas asks as he surfaces and dabs his mouth with his cloth napkin.

Dean belatedly slices off a piece of his meal and pops it in his mouth. A generically bland compliment dies on his tongue. Jesus Christ - that’s some good cow. It practically disintegrates before he can chew. “Great,” he tells Cas honestly.

Cas hums in contentment.

“And since you’re practically at third base with that salmon,” Dean starts, “I take it-”

“Oh my god!” a woman’s voice squeals behind them.

Dean reflexively turns his head in the direction of the commotion. A few tables over, near the center of the restaurant, a man is down on one knee, and - son of a bitch.

Dean watches, his mouth hanging open, as the woman shouts, “Yes, of course, yes!” Waiters walk past their table with a whole fucking bottle of champagne. People at nearby tables fucking clap.

Dean resolutely turns back around to face Cas, at a loss for words that aren’t extremely loud swears.

“Isn’t that nice?” Cas says mildly.

“Yeah, very nice for them,” Dean says through gritted teeth. 

Of all the goddamn nights. Of all the goddamn restaurants. What are the goddamn chances?

Dean slices into his steak with extreme prejudice. If he could murder the happy couple, he would. With zero regrets.

Fuck it all, Claire’s gonna be insufferable.

  A CHARMING B&B IN VERMONT

Dean wakes up delightfully cozy with Cas spooning him from behind. No memory foam, but the bed is delightfully springy anyway. It was definitely what they needed after a full school day and a nine-hour road trip. Luckily, the owner of the bed and breakfast, a charming older woman actually named Mrs. Butters, was happy to wait up for their late check-in last night. She even had hot cocoa waiting.

Dean had held out a slight hope they could christen their room before they turned in for the night, but Cas passed right out before Dean turned on the lights. Poor guy had to deal with three sets of angry parents, and it was only the second week of school. Something about how their supposed-genius kids should be in AP Latin instead of the Fun Latin class - aka the one for dumbass seniors.

The mid-morning sunlight filtering in from behind the plaid curtains casts everything in a warm glow. The room itself is beyond charming. There’s a legit fireplace next to the bed, and they’re currently nestled under a patchwork quilt. The wood panelled walls give a distinctly rustic feel to the place, despite the reasonably sized television screen mounted on the far wall.

Dean turns over in bed so he’s facing Cas instead of the door. He resists the urge to poke him awake, and instead prods with a gentle, “Cas.”

Cas grumbles wordlessly. Fucker doesn’t even open his eyes, although Dean can tell from how his breathing changes that he’s awake.

“Cas.”

Cas wrinkles his nose and shoves his face into the pillow. “What, Dean?”

Dean can barely make out the words, but he gets the gist from the million times Cas has done the exact same thing. “I smell bacon.”

Cas’s eyes slit open. “So?”

“Don’t you want bacon?”

Cas huffs, and Dean can tell the exact moment he resigns to waking up. “Then go get the bacon. Nobody’s stopping you, Meat Man.”

Dean wiggles in bed, jostling the whole mattress. “Come on, babe.”

“I was sleeping.” Cas raises his head to look squint out the window. “It has to be before ten am. Since when are you a morning person?”

Since today is the day Dean is going to propose.

Instead, Dean reminds him pointedly, “Bacon.”

“Ugh,” Cas groans as he sits up. “I expect at least a blow job after breakfast if we’re leaving bed this early.”

Dean slaps his ass and jumps out of bed before Cas can retaliate. “Up and at ‘em!”

“I hate you.”

“Love you too, Cas.”

* * *

Claire 11:02 Did you ask him yet? If he said no I’ve got chunky monkey waiting

Claire 11:31 That was a joke Uncle Cas will say yes Theres no way he wont

Claire 11:40 If you’re not answering because of sex don’t tell me

Dean sighs as his phone lights up with Claire’s latest text. In the bathroom, Cas hurls again. 

Dean 11:41 No proposal

The bubbles showing Claire’s typing start almost immediately.

Claire 11:41 Are you serious? He’s not goin to turn you down!!!

Dean 11:41 Food poisoning

Claire 11:42 HAHAHAHA

Dean scowls at his phone.

Dean 11:44 Not now, Claire.

Claire 11:44 Wait Seriously?

Dean 11:44 We think it was something he ate at breakfast

Claire 11:44 Oh fuck I’m sorry for laughing

Dean rereads her text. He hasn’t ever received a straight-up apology from Claire before. Unsure of how to respond, he sets down his phone and gently pushes open the bathroom door. “How’re you doing, babe?”

Cas, slumped over the toilet and looking like death warmed over, raises his head an inch. “It seems to be easing up.”

“Really?”

Cas vomits into the toilet again. He groans.

“Shit,” Dean mutters as he crouches next to Cas. He rubs his back with one hand. “Do you think you can get some water down?”

Cas nods, so Dean straightens and fills a glass next to the sink.

As Cas drinks, Dean runs a hand through Cas’s sweaty hair. His forehead has a sickly sheen to it, and the back of his neck feels hot.

“Dean -” Cas breaks off to cough the water right back up into the toilet. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey, no,” Dean says quickly as he refills the glass. “Don’t be sorry. This isn’t your fault.”

“But you had all these plans,” Cas moans as he takes the water to try again.

“We’ll do ‘em some other time.” He wets a washcloth and wipes down Cas’s forehead.

“Before Thanksgiving,” Cas rasps, “we’ll come back. I don’t want to miss the leaves changing.”

“Of course,” Dean says soothingly. He moves the washcloth to the nape of Cas’s neck. “On the bright side, you’ve been puking for, like, an hour. There can’t be much left.”

Cas, the dramatic bastard, nearly brains himself on the toilet seat with the force of his next hurl.

  HOMEMADE DINNER

After the disastrous fancy restaurant and B&B, a homemade dinner has to be the way to go. They’ll be in their own goddamn house - that has to cut down on the number of things that can go wrong.

Dean spends a whole week deliberating on what to make. He could do his usual burgers and fries routine, Cas’s favorite, but it should be special.

He settles on beef wellington. Pie for beef!

It’s a bitch to make - both because puff pastry from scratch is no joke, and hiding his first experiments from Cas means inventing increasingly convoluted reasons to get him out of the house. And, sure, every Youtube chef and Great British Bake off contestant has said store-bought puff pastry is fine, but Dean doesn’t want fine, he needs perfect. 

Dean picks a day when Cas has Model UN afterschool. It’s in the middle of the week, but at least Cas is guaranteed out of the house until six at night.

By 5:58, Dean is ready. The Wellington is cooling on the counter; the red wine has been breathing (whatever the hell that does) for the better part of an hour; and he’s showered and made himself presentable.

His phone pings at six pm on the dot. 

Heart sinking with foreboding, Dean taps the screen.

Cas 6:00 I’m going to be late for dinner. There was an accident with chemistry club a few minutes ago. The building had to be evacuated.

Dean 6:00 Are you OK?

Dean takes a moment to hammer the heel of his hand against his forehead. One fucking break. That’s all he’s asking for. One goddamn evening to go right.

Cas 6:00 Yes, and the kids are too. They’re airing out the halls now, but we won’t be let in for another half hour.

Dean picks up the wine with the hand not holding his phone. 

Dean 6:01 What time do you think you’ll be home?

Cas 6:01 7:30 maybe? I’ll keep you updated.

Dean swigs back a gulp straight from the bottle before he can answer. Fuck this.

Dean 6:02 Great! I’ll order pizza when you’re on your way back

Cas 6:02 Meatlovers?

Dean 6:02 Unless you’d like something else

Cas 6:02 No thank you :)

Dean flips on a recorded Jeopardy! episode as he cleans up the kitchen and texts Charlie. He has a free dinner waiting for her if she can hightail it to his place in the next hour and never speak of it again.

  HOMEMADE DINNER #2

If Dean is anything, he’s stubborn. John Winchester raised no quitter. Try, try, and try again. And try a fourth time, when the first three go sideways.

Burgers, this time. They don’t need a days’ worth of prep. And they’ll go over well.

“Dig in,” Dean says as he sets the plate down in front of Cas.

“This looks delicious, Dean,” Cas says sincerely as he picks up his burger.

Dean waits, and he can see the moment Cas tastes the molten cheese stuffed in the middle of the patty. His eyes go wide with surprise.

“Like it?”

Cas nods vigorously and inhales the rest of his burger in record time.

“There’s enough for us to have thirds,” Dean says smugly. 

Cas smears ketchup all over patty number two, and beams at him. “These make me very happy.”

Dean laughs. “That’s the goal-”

Cas’s phone rings.

Dean falters.

Cas stares at him expectantly, waiting for Dean to continue.

“You should get that,” Dean says, his shoulders slumping as he sets his burger down. It’s probably a bad sign he was already half-expecting things to go south. “It’s probably important, or whoever it is would’ve texted.”

“We’re in the middle of dinner,” Cas protests even as he reaches in his pocket to pull his phone out. “It’s Claire,” he says, baffled, before he picks up. “Hello?”

Cas sets down his half-eaten burger. He listens, his brows slamming down forbiddingly as Claire’s voice gets louder and louder, but still not loud enough for Dean to make out actual words. Silently, Cas takes his napkin off his lap and pushes his half-empty beer in Dean’s direction. Finally Cas says, “Yes, of course, Claire.”

Dean frowns as Cas lifts his gaze up to meet his. “Jimmy and Amelia?” he mouths.

Cas shakes his head, speaking into his phone,  “Does Kaia need a pick up from the hospital?”

Dean goes cold. Kaia was actually one of his favorite students. While she was in his class, she won a Scholastic Gold Key and honorable mention for two of her horror novellas and always did the reading. But Dean and Cas haven’t seen her since she broke up with Claire the summer before college.

“Is she okay?” Dean asks quietly.

Cas’s mouth thins. He gives a short nod.

Dean sighs and picks up the plate uneaten burgers. He can probably reheat the patties. The fries won’t keep, though, so he leaves the plate in front of Cas. He shoves a few in his mouth and gets to his feet.

He’s halfway through cleaning the frying pan when Cas gets off the phone with Claire.

“Are you heading out?” Dean asks gruffly while he gives the iron a particularly hard scrub.

“Yes,” Cas rumbles as he wraps an arm around Dean’s waist. “I’m sorry to cut dinner short.”

“Hey, it’s Kaia. ’Course we gotta help.” Dean forces an understanding smile on his face. “I’ll make up the couch while you pick her up?”

Cas squeezes him gently before moving away. “Thank you.”

“You got time for the cliff notes on what happened? Why’d you get the call?”

Cas leans against the counter next to the sink. “Kaia was in a car accident. She’s a little banged up, but mostly fine. A few bruised ribs and a possible concussion.” He shakes his head, disbelieving. “You know Kaia was never especially close with her foster family, so Claire got the emergency call.”

“Huh.” Dean grabs a plate to clean. “It’s been two years since the split.”

Cas shrugs. “I’m not sure what their situation is. I know Claire was surprised. She’s already in her car, and she should be here by midnight. Hopefully she recognizes Kaia’s injuries,” he frowns, “and they won’t try any… any ‘hanky panky’ tonight.”

Dean laughs, and if it’s slightly higher than normal, Cas doesn’t seem to pick up on it. He grabs Cas and kisses him square on the mouth. “You are ridiculous. Nobody says hanky panky. What the hell is wrong with you?”

Cas scowls. “They have to be well past kissing at this point.”

Dean snorts a laugh. “Yeah, that ship has long sailed, dude.”

Cas throws his hands in the air. “We don’t have enough sleeping surfaces to separate them.”

Dean sets the dirty plate down to face Cas fully. “Do you really think they’ll get back together? Kaia broke Claire’s heart not too long ago.”

Cas throws him a look like he wonders where the hell Dean’s logical brain has flown to. “Are you asking if I think couples can get back together after a harrowing break up?”

“… no.”

Cas shakes his head ruefully. “You’re more like Claire than I ever was, and you took me back.”

“Huh,” Dean wipes his hands off on a dishtowel, “you might have something there.”

“You do call me the smart one,” Cas says as he pushes off the counter and heads to the doorway. “It has been known to happen.”

“Smartass,” Dean corrects loudly as Cas grabs his coat and keys.

“Semantics.” Cas doubles back to kiss Dean a proper goodbye, and it’s just as electric as it was when they were seventeen. Cas tastes like Dean’s cooking, and he’s been letting his stubble grow out, the short hairs rasping against Dean’s palm as he cups Cas’s cheek.

“I love you, Dean,” Cas says as he draws away.

Dean grins. “I know.”

Cas huffs an almost-laugh as he heads back towards the door. “Now who’s the smartass?”

  IN BED

Cas, the son of a bitch, falls asleep before Dean can wring out a second orgasm out of him. Such a godamn shame. Just goes to show, they really aren’t teenagers anymore. At least Dean got to use the new vibrator he bought for the occasion and the edible panties. 

Dean flops back in bed. Maybe he should put the proposals on pause. Clearly, marriage isn’t in the cards. He can be a bit dense when it comes to Cas and him, but there’s dense and there’s denial.

It’s been two and a half months. Five proposal attempts. They’re nearly halfway through October, and he’s no closer to getting a ring on Cas’s finger than he was in late August, sweating bullets in that stupid fancy restaurant.

He can’t keep planning and failing to propose to Cas every other week. One, he can’t handle the stress and constant brainstorming. And B, he’s way behind in writing college recommendations and grading his freshman’s essays on Animal Farm. 

Cas isn’t going anywhere. Dean isn’t going anywhere. So Dean can cool the proposals for now and start fresh in January.

  SCHOOL ASSEMBLY

“I hate these,” Dean mutters to Benny. He frowns across the top rows of the bleachers where the seniors are supposed to sit. There are a few notable faces missing, but nobody that belongs to Dean’s homeroom, so he couldn’t give less of a shit. Below them, sit most of the juniors, and pretty much all of the sophomores and freshmen.

“It’s thirty minutes, brother,” Benny says, patting his arm. “You’ll live.”

“Shows what you know,” Dean grumbles back as Jody strides to the middle of the gym, microphone in hand. He asks Benny, “Do you know what this one’s about? Bullying? Cliques? Hugs not drugs?”

Benny shakes his head.

Jody sighs loudly into the mike. Clearly, she wants to be here just as much as he does. “Thank you all for coming,” she starts like any of them had a real choice. “First things first, Halloween is in two days, and while costumes are allowed and encouraged, don’t be racist.” She grimaces. “God help me, I don’t know why I still have to say that. If you are unsure if your costume is racist, it probably is. Wear something else. Secondly…”

Dean tunes her out. Instead, he scans the bleachers again, this time looking for Cas. He should be with the other sophomore homeroom teachers, but there’s no sign of him. Dean frowns. He can’t remember the last time Cas played hooky. And never without Dean. Dick move, Cas.

Movement at the edge of the gym catches Dean’s eye, and he watches, puzzled, as two students roll out one of the old projectors. The overhead lights turn off.

Is Jody seriously going to make him sit through a slide show? They’re wasting a prefectly good Friday morning on a goddamn PowerPoint?

The projector flips on, and the first photo is… of Dean. 

What the fuck? His mouth drops open in horror. In the picture, he’s in his junior year of high school - he can tell from the hair - with a bunch of people he hasn’t seen in fifteen years. Plus Cas, who’s at the next table over in the cafeteria, head bowed over a book and slightly out of focus.

There’s a click, and text scrawls along the bottom of the screen, Destiel Met in Edlund High School Fifteen Years Ago! 

The projector flips to the next photo, this time showing Dean’s senior yearbook picture.

More than a handful of students peer excitedly in his direction, undoubtedly hoping for a reaction.

Scowling, Dean cranes his neck to search the crowd for Charlie’s flaming red hair. She’s the only one who refers to the two of them as “Destiel”. Everyone else uses their names like sane people.

But the projector clicks to a photo of Cas, and Dean can’t help getting distracted. In the picture, Cas is alone at a table in the library. God, he was cute back then. His cheeks were a little fuller, and his hair was curlier. He still had the same intense blue-eyed stare, though. Patented Cas.

It all started with a tutoring session. Young Mr. W needed help in Latin, and our future Latin teacher, Mr. N, was up to the task!

Dean is going to kill Charlie. He tries to get to his feet - maybe she’s hiding behind Jo or something. But Benny’s hand grips his upper arm, holding him in place. “Don’t,” Benny says softly.

“What?” Dean demands as he tries to shake Benny off and fails. “Do you know what the hell is going on?”

“Stay.” The corners of Benny’s mouth twitch like he’s fighting a smile. “Watch.”

Dean huffs a breath and turns back around. If it was anyone else, Jo or Charlie, he wouldn’t trust a word out of their mouths. Benny, though, he’s not the type to make Dean sit through this without a good reason.

But that’s all ancient history. Destiel really got started five years ago, in this very gym.

The projector shows a picture of their class reunion, when Dean met Cas after ten years of no contact. They’re standing pretty close together (but that doesn’t mean much with Castiel What-Is-Personal-Space Novak), and they appear deep in conversation.

Since then, they have been inseparable.

Dean and Cas at a softball game. Dean and Cas at homecoming. Dean and Cas at GSA’s pride party.

Here’s to fifteen more years of Destiel!

The students clap and cheer with more than a few laughs.

Musical Interlude! flashes in front of a picture of Dean playing guitar to a group of pajama-clad students at last year’s Senior Lock-In.

The lights flip back on, and Dean blinks as his eyes adjust. By the time the spots have cleared from his vision, the projector has been wheeled away, leaving the main floor of the gym empty.

A staticky crackle echoes around the gym. And - is that Def Leppard playing on the speakers?

As the intro to Rock of Ages plays, the cheerleading team troops out from the locker rooms. 

They start a routine Dean’s never seen before. To Rock of fucking Ages.

The cheerleaders sings along with Joe Elliot, “What do you want?”

Dean’s mouth falls open as the entire high school chants back, “I want rock and roll. Long live rock and roll!”

By the time they get to the “Rock of Ages” chant, all the students are on their feet, clapping along with the beat and cheering.

The song dies down soon after, and Dean, a broad smile on his face, turns to Benny. “I don’t know what the hell is going on, but I dig it.”

Benny laughs. “Good. He’ll be pleased.”

Dean’s just about to ask who he is (he’s 99% he knows), when Cas walks out from behind the bleachers. 

Cas takes the microphone from Jody. He coughs nervously, waiting for the students to settle back down. “Thank you,” he says to the cheerleading team. “That was... awesome.” He glances up at the assembled students and teachers. “Dean-” he pauses as the cheers and clapping start up in earnest “-can you please come down here?”

But Dean’s frozen to the spot.

Benny gives him a not-so-light jab with his elbow. “Go on.”

Dean shakily gets to his feet and makes his way to the gym floor, and he swears his legs are about to give out from under him.

“Alright, you got my attention,” Dean says with forced bravado. “What’s up, Cas?”

The students hoot and holler.

Cas reddens as they die down again. Clutching the microphone in a death grip, he says, “Dean, we have been together for a number of years.”

Dean grins, a wonderful, all-consuming giddiness filling him the longer he stands in front of Cas. “I know, dude. I was there.”

The students laugh and someone, probably Jo, wolf whistles.

Cas swallows. “I wanted to do this here, where we first met, where you first asked me out on a date, where we had our first kiss.”

“Don’t tell ‘em about all our firsts on school property,” Dean says in a stage-whisper, “or Jody’s gonna have an aneurysm.���

Over a fresh round of student laughter, Jody puts her head in her hands. Donna, the school guidance counselor, pats her a few times on the back.

“Dean Winchester,” Cas says, and, shit, his hands are shaking. “I have loved you for more than half my life, and I look forward to far more than fifteen years by your side. Will you marry me?’

Dean’s not stupid. He had a strong hunch, ever since Rock of Ages played - aka the cassette he put in the Impala the first time he took Cas for a drive fifteen years and a lifetime ago - that this was what Cas was leading up to. 

He’s mostly surprised Cas had the guts to pop the question this way. There was a reason Dean tried to keep his proposal plans mostly to the two of them. One of them is practically a social hermit, and it’s sure as shit not Dean.

“Just say yes, jerk!”

Dean spins around, nearly tripping over his own feet in surprise. Fuck, that’s Sam. His giant of a brother is hovering right outside the gym’s double doors, beaming at the pair of them. Claire gives a little wave from where she’s half-hiding behind him.

Dean turns back to Cas. He can’t think about Sam right now. Or Claire. Or the five hundred students with their eyes on them. 

Only Cas.

“Cas,” he says, and it feels like the whole room is holding their collective breath, none more so than Cas, who looks like he’s about to pass out. “Man, I’ve loved you since I was seventeen. Of course I’ll marry you.”

Cas lets out a shaky exhale of relief, and Dean laughs. He takes the microphone from Cas’s now slack grip, steps all the way into Cas’s personal space, and kisses him.

The cheers from the assembled students are nearly deafening.

[a-forgotten-spirit]

Love Isn’t An Illusion (8)

Pairing: Todoroki x Bakugou, Todoroki X Reader x Bakugou, VERY SLOW BUILD

Summary: First day of training camp, chilling with Todoroki and falshing Bakugou

Words: +-6900

Warnings: fear of forgetting something, parents with tone, anxiety, showering, wet hair, sitting with Todoroki, skirts, nervousness, quirk getting taken away, fighting dirt monsters, flashing Bakugou, lack of eating, tiredness, swearing, yelling at Aizawa, angy, bath / hot spring, scars, nudity, Mineta (nothing happens it’s what he did in the show).

Tagged:  @kittycatspervertedheart​ @lemorrite​ @gwendlynn​ @marleps​ @thicctati2​ @saitamastamaticsoup​ @succulent-momma​ @aurorahoneybuns​ @imjusttireddudes​ @misconceptualised​ @ochabby​ @katsukisuwus​ @gayverlinq​ @star-witchs-blog​ @icyhotpie​ @kyrah-williams​

A/N: I wrote this for the fans. I do not own My Hero academia or the characters, I don’t own most of the plot for this story, I had watched the show and re-written the dialogue and plot as if the reader was the main character. Everything is centred around the reader. Please comment, makes me happy. Ask if you wish to be tagged.

Masterlist

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7

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Chapter 8

Waking up to the blaring sound of an alarm wasn’t the best but I could have woken up worse. Throwing my arm out of the warm soft covers I turned off the alarm and closed my eyes for a second sighing then throwing myself from the bed. I wasn’t a morning person, I never was and I never will be. I walked to my bathroom letting out another sigh as I removed my clothes placing them in the hamper before moving into the shower. It was warm and my muscles instantly began to relax, a week with my class non-stop. A whole week, this was going to be long but I knew I was going to have a lot of fun. 

Washing my body and hair, I left the shower making sure to step on the rug and not the tiled floor having fallen far too many times to not be careful. I placed my hair in a towel cage. Flipping my head down, placing the towel over my head and twirling the fabric before flipping it back over my head. Hair drying and out of my face it’s was a win-win. I stretched and looked over my bag one last time making sure to pack the extra, extra charger for Todoroki. 

I knew I had to get dressed but I just didn’t want to, I didn’t want to get dressed or move. I was tired and needed more sleep even though I had gotten more than the recommended amount. Shaking my head and slapping my face lightly I nodded and began to get ready.

I got dressed and was thankful for button shirts as my hair could stay in the towel and dry for a little while longer waiting until I took the towel off to throw on the jumper. I made sure to look at my bag again, I had everything I knew I had everything but the fear of forgetting something was a lot to take. I shook my head. I’m sure someone would let me borrow something if I desperately needed it. I wasn’t worried. I was excited. I moved to take my headphones off charge placing the charger in and then rolling my eyes making my way back into the bathroom and placing all my toiletries in the travel bag than in my bag. Now I was sure I was ready. I was confused about why we had to wear our uniforms but I didn’t question it. 

I walked downstairs with my suitcase and then looked to my mum saying I was ready. It took more effort then I would ever admit to putting my suitcase in the car but that was for another time. Finally sitting down we began the drive to school. 

“Message me on your way back, hopefully, we will be home but if not you can call Lacy” Lacy who was mums butler per se. I had never asked her for a thing but I might ask for a lift home after the camp. I nodded. “Do you have everything or do I need to stop” there was the tone I had been missing for the past couple days. 

“I have everything” I nodded and then the car ride was silent. Driving in the parking lot I could see a bunch of my friends and the other class, I forgot they were coming. Getting out I moved to the boot and grabbed my suitcase. “Bye Mum” I called out from the boot and got a quick reply and then she was off. I walked over to the group and Aizawa began to talk, I made it just in time.

“Now that you are finished up your first semester at UA high. It’s time for summer vacation to finally begin” I was pulling at my hair still slightly damp from the shower I had taken that morning. It wasn’t dripping onto the jumper so I was happy with it. “However, don’t think these will be months of rest for you heroes in the making” why was he always so serious, it made me on edge and scared for whenever he spoke. “This camp will be to push you beyond your limits” I wanted to but in saying he already had with my exam but a swift bite of my lip and I was silenced. “You’re aiming to become plus ultra” then we were waiting to leave. 

I sighed and felt my hair again, I hoped it would dry but I knew it was only bothering me because I was thinking about it. I stood with a few other people talking about my suitcase having been put on the bus by someone I had never seen before. I was excited and nervous all at once. I watched as Kaminari and Mina left the conversation to dance with a red-faced Uraraka clapping for camp. They all looked so excited. 

“I heard some of class A has to take extra courses. Does that mean they failed the final exams, that would be so embarrassing? Especially because you are meant to be so much better than my class. All of you must be waddling in shame” the blonde boy from 1-B shouted his eyes wide and voice loud. I seriously didn’t like him, he really had a problem but he fell to the ground with one hit upside the head from Kendo and he was out. He didn’t like my class but...there was no but, he was just rude. 

She picked him up with ease by his collar “Don’t mind him” he was then dragged towards the bus and I wondered how many hours a day he was knocked out on average I would be quite interested in the outcome. 

“Oh the rest of class B” Midoriya smiled and I turned to see some familiar faces looking back at me. I couldn’t see any distaste or anger when I met their eyes so I didn’t look away but I was nervous. 

“It’s nice to see you outside the sports festival” her eyes were so wide and she had this smirk on her face but from no one batting an eye I figured that was just her personality "I guess now we’re not technically rivals” I don’t think Monoma got that memo. I saw a few nods and I smiled to the class.

“Time to get on the bus” Kendo called out from the door, I wasn’t sure if she was the class Rep but I knew whatever she said everyone listened too. Like a big sister, though I liked it. The class had someone they trusted and always looked too. Everyone in class B began to board and I looked to my class if we were meant to follow. 

Though my thoughts were short-lived “Attention Class A our bus is here” Iidas’ arms were moving frantically his face stern and serious. “Line up in seating order” we all boarded and I moved to where I was meant to be sitting down and then looking out the window. 

“I am seated with you, I think” I turned to see Todoroki and then sat down with me next to him. The lords are blessing me once again. He was so graceful as he sat down, not even making a sound. 

“I brought the charger” I smiled and he spoke a quick ‘thank you’ as he proceeded to explain he lost track of time with his Mum “Don’t mention it, I stress so I would have had a spare even if you didn’t ask me beforehand” I laughed and he smiled, it was so small but I caught it, or did I imagine it. 

We began to drive off, I wondered how long a trip it would be to the destination “Listen up, you’ll be on this bus about an hour before our first stop” it seemed all my questions were having immediate responses today. “Make sure you stay focused” Aizawa was one of the most serious people I had ever met. 

“Why aren’t we blasting some music” of course it was Kaminari to say something like that. I was laughing lightly at the comment. I looked behind Todoroki and I and saw Bakugou and Tokoyami then in front was Tsu and Uraraka. 

“No one should be standing that is a safety hazard, please remain seated” A definitely standing and angry or more so worried Iida yelled. I don’t think one person cared for what Aizawa had said or they just chose to ignore it. “Do not open that window” I laughed again quietly.  

The journey may have only been an hour but it was far too long for my back on the uncomfortable seats. I had filled the time talking to Todoroki, just about anything and everything. Showing him things on my phone and him doing the same. We talked and it felt so natural and easy to talk to him. We talked until we were told to get off where he moved to let me out first, I made sure to thank him. When getting off I held my skirt jumping down off the rather high last step of the bus and sighed out walking forward into the group then moving to stand with Todoroki again. 

“Finally, I needed to get off that bus” I agreed with Kaminari, it was an hour but a long hour. I didn’t regret it though, I got to talk to Todoroki for an hour which was by far a bonus in my books. Mineta cried about having to go to the bathroom though from what I could see we were just on the side of the road. 

“You didn’t think we stopped here so you could stretch your legs did you” I turned seeing Aizawa, hands in his pockets and leaning back in a lazy stance like he was built to just standstill. Mineta stood in front of him begging to be able to go to the bathroom. 

Then the door to the mysterious random car opened “Hey Eraser” so they knew Aizawa and judging by his lack of care, we weren’t in danger. Aizawa bowed and commented that it had been quite a while since he had seen the person still in the car. Then two girls jumped out one wearing pink and the other blue. Dressed in cat costumes. “You’re feline fantasies are here”

“Purfectly cute and cat-like girls” I mean they weren’t wrong they did have the whole look going for them. I was confused, this is why we had stopped for a few girls to just jump around in front of us. 

“You can call us the wild, wild pussy cats” they finished their little routine and posed with a smaller boy standing next to them. They sure were confident and loud, I’m sure Mic would get along with them quite well. Though the class stood in silence. 

“These are the Pro heroes you’ll be working with for summer training camp” I didn’t doubt they were heroes but they did scare me. I wasn’t a fan of overly loud people… I was a fan of one overly loud person. They, on the other hand, were a bit too much for my liking. 

“They are a four-person hero team that specialises in mountain rescues. The pussy cats were founded when we were kids” I saw the two women stumble at his words, they didn’t like their age being mentioned. “Like forever ago” another hit to the ego. “This marks their twelfth year working as-” Midoriya was fanboying again, eyes wide with a matching smile though he was cut off by a hand, paw, to the face. 

“I’m pretty sure your mouth must be off” I was right, they were sensitive about their age. It was the blue one who had a problem and I stepped slightly closer to Todoroki being a little scared of the women. “I’m eighteen at heart” of course she was. 

We all collectively bowed and said our Hellos as of Aizawa's request. I was confused about why we had stopped if they were going to be our guides for the next week. I didn’t understand why we couldn’t meet them at camp. Though I didn’t voice my questions opting for just standing with Todoroki. 

“We own this whole stretch of land, everything you can see” I was impressed, to say the least, it was a lot of land they owned not to mention how dense the forest was. It was the pink one talking, she seemed kind and loving “The camp you're staying at is there, at the base of the mountain” her voice was so calm as she simply pointed out into the area she owned. 

It was quite far, I tilted my head in confusion. Why were we here then? “Uh, why did we stop all the way up here instead?” Uraraka asked Tsu to turn to face her friend. She voiced all our thoughts and I was grateful not even wanting to speak with the blue cat still on a rampage. 

“I’m afraid we both know the answer to that” was I missing something? Had I not read something or was I not listening? I looked around and saw a few people shaking their heads in disbelief. 

“That can’t be right,” Sato said slowly his head shaking, what was I missing. I looked out, we were on the side of a mountain. What were we going to do from here? Like sure it was nice to see where we would be staying but weren’t we just wasting time. 

“Ok, back on the bus” Sero whispered his voice shaky and nervous. “Let’s go” wait, no they couldn’t be serious. I was reading this wrong, I had to be. Sero slowly turned to the bus as did a few others as we all agreed.

“The current time is nine-thirty in the morning” why was she mentioning the time. I was losing my mind, this couldn’t be real right? I felt my heart speed, why was time mentioned. “If you’re fast about it, you might make it there by noon” she smiled her tail slowly waving behind her. They weren’t going to make us walk there, were they?

I watched as everyone began to run to the bus in a panic, I just stayed still. If they wanted this to happen, we weren’t getting a choice about it. Sure I was angry but a simple bridge to the camp, we’d be there within the hour. It was easy, annoying but easy nonetheless. 

“Kitties that don’t make it there by twelve don’t get any lunch” she called out and I sighed looking to my fellow peers running, or at least making a break for the bus. I walked over a little more so I could see them. 

“You should have guessed students” Aizawa began his voice monotone and easy to read, he didn’t care. He was changing his mind. “The training camp” the blue one dropped in front of the group a collective yell being heard. “Has already begun” just before anything happened I felt something clasp to my wrist. “You need to work on not having a quirk” I was confused and then I was being thrown off a mountain. 

“I swear I’m going to kill you Aizawa” I screamed my body going flying through the air as I held my skirt down trying to have some form of decency why of course I wasn’t allowed my quirk, why would I? The teachers loved making my life difficult. 

We were all falling, dirt coming with us, the blue one. The blue one could control dirt? Or at least something like that. I held down my skirt as I was falling, I couldn’t believe we had been thrown off a cliff. We all landed with a shout and some groans.

“Good news” I looked up at the pink cat, her smile genuine and wide as she leaned over the rails to view us. “This is private land so you can use your quirks as much as you want too” I stood quickly feeling rage boil inside me. “You have three full hours, you should be able to make it to the facility in that time” was she joking, was this some kind of sick joke? “That is if you can get through the beast forest” I walked over. 

“What quirk” I yelled and held up my arm showing the bracelet “I don’t get my quirk, what kind of absolute bullshit is this'” I was furious. I didn’t like not having my quirk or at least being equal with my classmates. “Aizawa” I yelled and saw his face lean over, I dangled my arm in the air “Hello” I screamed. 

“Your quirk would allow everyone to easily get through without so much as a thought. So I take the quirk you work on your physical abilities and the class gets to learn” he was smiling, I could hear the smirk in his voice as I steamed. Rage and anger boiling in my veins. 

“No” I shook my head, “First the exam and now this. This isn’t fair” I yelled out, I knew my class was behind me. I knew they could see me losing my mind. I was so angry, why could I not just be treated like the rest of them. 

“Your quirk is unfair” he shrugged...shrugged. He just shrugged it off! My hands were shaking as I had so many thoughts running through my head. I was so mad as I gripped my head in anger. 

I didn’t answer turning and watched as Mineta ran into the woods, he needed a bathroom. Though with the sound of a growl I looked up seeing a forest monster of sorts, big root teeth and arms as thick as logs. I heard a few screams but I was running.

I was so angry that my quirk had been taken I jumped high into the air and growled as I came crashing down onto the creatures head my foot landing and splitting the wood and dirt. I landed and looked back up the teachers “Fuck your forest” I screamed and then I was off again walking deeper into the woods with the class following. 

“Y/N are you ok” I turned to see Midoriya and I knew everyone was watching me as I continued to walk, my footfalls loud and deep. Anyone could see I was angry, I was so angry. 

“Do I look ok” I glared at the green-headed teen and he shook his head “There’s your answer” I grit my teeth and clenched my fists. “I am going to destroy each and every one of these pathetic little monsters and then when I get to camp I am going to lose my shit” I finished. “These monsters are just dirt, the blues quirk” I added. 

We walked through the woods and slowly more and more began to appear, the next one was flying. Of course, this was going to be difficult. Why wouldn’t it be? We were working together to kill as many as possible. 

“Seven in total, they’re coming” Jiro called out as I jumped from tree to tree. I jumped onto a flying one, digging my hand into the wing and pulling back, breaking it. The beast began to fall as I jumped not being crushed with it. I walked over and slammed my foot down into the creature it didn’t get back up. 

Sato and Kirishima beat one while Dark Shadow and Ojiro took down another one. Mineta was running as well but Kaminari had used far too much electricity and his brain short-circuiting due to the intensity. I ran and picked him up before he was hit again. Iida kicked one, how many of these things were there? I was running with Kaminari, he was quite light. Toru was good at luring the monsters to set locations so the others could attack. Mina throwing acid on the legs making them fall. I could have ended this fight so quickly but no I wasn’t allowed my quirk. I placed down Kaminari with Shoji and I was off again trying to pull off the bracelet, it didn’t work. 

I was fighting one, my mind clear and body fast as I ran through the legs and jumped on it’s back running up the back “Bakugou” I called out and kicked the creatures head forward making the weak spot on top of the head seeable. A yell and an explosion the creature was pieces. I fell through the air holding my skirt as I landed. “No quirk no fucking pants” I cursed. 

Momo had made a canon and was blasting the creature while Tsu and Uraraka were working together by just throwing them in the air with zero gravity and then making them crash into the ground harshly. I watched as Bakugou continued to explode things. He seemed very happy. I continued to run as one followed me. There were more than seven now, there had to be.

“Ojiro, Tokoyami '' I called out and then ducked skidding along with my knees beneath a large branch as the creature got caught and then was destroyed by the two of them. “Thanks,” I called out. 

“No problem” I heard in response and I was off again, running and jumping through the tree and ground. Dodging the creatures moved and their domino effect in the forest. I had to not get hurt. My knees were covered in dirt and I was sure my clothes were too. 

Todoroki and Bakugou were working together. Ice slid along the ground rising and covering the legs and torsos of the monster then while they were stopped Bakugou came in with devastating blows. Exploding the dirt and smoke being created. They were flawless, I ran past jumping up to land the final blow, a kick to the top of the head as my leg fell all the way through as I landed on the ground crouching. Then Todoroki and Bakugou were running with me. 

There were so many of them. She could make them quickly I could at least give her that but by the time we thought we were almost to the camp the sun was setting. Anger was boiling through my body. I was covered in dirt. I was flung into the air with my ass on full display as I went to cover myself I was going to be hit but was caught by none other than Bakugou. Who had given me quite a bit of a tongue lashing with flushed cheeks? 

When we saw the ‘clearing’ I was on a march. Half the people could barely stand, we were holding each other up. What kind of bullshit was this, on the first day? We hadn’t even made it to the camp! Todoroki was shivering, Bakugou holding his arm, Iida not even able to use one of his legs, Kaminari was out of power. Everyone was like this, I was tired, exhausted. I hadn’t been able to use my quirk which could have helped my friends. 

“I hope you are happy” I called out anger dripping from my lips as I walked out of the treeline my peers following “Do you have any idea how hard that was with no quirk” I threw my hands out in anger. “But no, who cares about Y/N she’s so strong and can do it” I made a digging motion with one hand. “Take this stupid bracelet off me this second” I was in front of Aizawa now. 

“You said that would only take like three hours” Sero gasped out. He was right, they had said that. Aizawa moved forward to unlock the bracelet, he was smirking at me. I was so mad. 

“I guessed we based it on how long it would take us, sorry” that’s all we got. A weak apology and a smile. We had fought our guts out and all we got was a sorry. I was shaking as Aizawa finally managed to get the bracelet off me. 

“You were too strong for this exercise. Your peers need to catch up” I understood why he did it but it was unfair to throw me into a beast infested forest with no quirk and no heads up. I walked away back to the group rubbing my wrist. 

“I thought it would take you kids even longer” it was the blue one, her paws over her mouth. It was her quirk we were fighting, a good quirk but I wanted to throw her off a cliff. “But you did a lot better against my dirt monsters then I thought you would” she smiled her voice light and high pitched, she had to be kidding? Was she doing this now, while we were all on the verge of collapsing? “You guys were seriously great, especially the five of you” she pointed to Iida, Mirdoriya, Todoroki, Bakugou and I. “It seems like you’ve had quite a bit of experience and the girl. Even without a quirk you still did some damage” Some? I did quite a bit of damage, I had my quirk back. I could do a lot more. "I call dibs on these kittens. I’ll groom them myself"

She came lunging at us and I simply put her in a box “I’m fine, thank you” I whispered out and raised my hand into the sky as the box began to float. I could feel her trying to get out “Much better” I sighed. 

Midoriya pointed out the little boy that had been with the two women all day, I had noticed him but didn’t care for children. I hated children, disgusting little things. “Oh he’s my cousin's son, he just lives with us now. Don’t be shy Kota, say hi to everyone. You’re going to be around them for the next week” 

“Y/N let her go” I sighed and dropped her from the sky, her tail spiked and she landed looking back to me with a scowl I glared back uninterested. Midoriya walked over to the small boy who seemed rather angry at the world. 

“Hi, my name is Midoriya.” Why was he trying to make friends with the child? I grimaced and a shiver ran through my body at the mere thought of talking to a child. “I’m from the UA highschool hero course, it’s nice to meet you” his hand was outstretched but Midoriya wasn’t met with a light or gentle handshake but a hard and powerful punch to his lower regions. He fell. I think I saw his soul leave him.  

Iida was running over within a second “What a low blow” I laughed silently, he wasn’t wrong. The blow was quite low. Iida managed to catch the falling boy in his arms “You fiend of a child” just another thing to add to the list of why I hated children. “A punch to the scrotum is unforgivable” I could imagine. 

“The last thing I want is to hang with some wannabe heroes” my face fell, he seemed to be angry. Teeth grit and eyes flared. Something had happened, no one hated with so much passion for no reason. 

“I can put him in a box” I swirled my hand mist falling from my skin like ink onto the ground. I had no shame just locking him inside a little endless prison for a few hours, days. 

“No” I heard Aizawa and let my quirk fade “We are not doing that” I could hear Iida still yelling as I sighed and looked away shrugged. “He’s just a kid” I didn’t care if he was eighty or eight he was being rude. 

“That brats got spunk” Bakugou smiled to the little human as I shook my head. He seems too proud of the little boy, I looked to the fallen Midoriya and realised this little kid was probably his favourite person right now. 

“He’s like a mini version of you” I turned to hear Todoroki, he had a point though. The kid did act like Bakugou in a way, a more immature Bakugou. I wondered what the two of them were like as kids. Would we have gotten along? They were the only children I would have been able to handle. 

“What are you talking about” Todoroki has made him mad again, Bakugou was storming over to the duel haired hero in training with a bounce in his step, a bounce ready to crush the other's skull. “Shut your mouth before I blast you all the way to hell” he was offended but if he liked the child I didn’t see why he was acting this way, I thought it could have been a compliment. 

“Yeah sure” Todoroki had simply stated as I walked over and pushed them away from each other with a shake of my head. It wasn’t worth it, not while we were all so tired. Also, I didn’t care for their little conversation about the kid, he was a rude little shit. I only had room for one in my life and that position was filled. 

“Enough playing around, get your stuff off the bus” they hadn’t even done us the courtesy of taking our things in. They had plenty of time to do it. “Once your bags are in your rooms, we will have dinner in the cafeteria. After that, you can bathe and sleep” the last two options were looking appealing right now. I would happily skip dinner to bathe now and sleep. “Tomorrow your training starts in earnest, better get a move on” 

We all walked towards the bus and I could see everyone struggling. I did love my class and they had helped me out all day. I walked in front of them all bending down to open the hatch. “Thank you for helping me today” I whispered and I made a little illusion for everyone. Getting all their bags “You just have to get the copy to your rooms” 

“Thank you” I was engulfed in a hug by Mina who was crying and rubbing her face into my shoulder in thanks. I pet her hand as an illusion walked over and helped her in ‘my’ arms as she cried. 

“Y/N you are honestly a goddess” Kirishima bowed and I flushed waving my hand in dismissal. I was just doing something nice, they deserved it after today and these illusions took next to no effort for me. They were easy, I had been making them since I was a young one. 

“It’s thanks for dealing with me being in a bad mood all day” I looked up and could see the thankful looks from everyone as a copy followed them holding their things as we walked into the building. I saw the boys sigh in defeat as we got to the crossroads “The illusion will stay, no need to worry” then the sighs of relief. 

Placing everyone's things in the room the illusion would bow and then fall into mist as I helped the girls move their things into their rooms and places they wanted them. I was thanked the whole time and waved it off. Making our way to the cafeteria we all sat down and said our thanks and began to eat. It was good, more than good. It was perfect. 

I ate slowly not having much of an appetite from the exams, I sat next to Bakugou or more so Bakugou had taken the seat next to me. I smiled that he wanted to sit with me. My other side was then occupied by Todoroki who was more than interested in the food. I saw Kirishima just shovelling rice into his mouth, he wasn’t chewing, I watched more. Not chewing, there was no way. 

Bakugou was doing the same and Todoroki was following, slower but just as eager. I ate slowly not eating too much, just enough to fill me. I knew I was getting a few looks but I didn’t care. The beef was nice and had a nice seasoning. I grabbed another piece of a plate and within one bite I moved to pick up the little plate and put it in front of Bakugou who took a piece and then took the plate. It was spicy. 

“This is amazing” he nodded and added it into his rice, no one else was eating it so I’m sure he could eat the rest of it with no issues. I turned and saw Todoroki looking for the water with his glass in hand and a jug was placed in front of him the illusion falling from stealing it from another table. 

“Thank you” he whispered and drank down his water, sighing out happily in contempt. I had finished eating and offered my leftover rice to the still eating Bakugou who didn’t hesitate to take the bowl and continue eating. 

Once everyone was done it was time for the bath, I was more than excited to sit and soak in a nice hot bath. I was walking slowly my head lolling to the side as I walked with the girls. Once in the room I grabbed anything I would or could need and I was off to the bath. I walked in happily my head beginning to clear with all the steam. 

Everyone was getting undressed as I looked down, I had never been one to get nude in front of people, sure I had been in changing rooms but never fully naked, I took to the stalls most of the time. I set up an illusion to cover myself as I walked out of the bath. I could see the confused faces but no one said anything. Stepping into the bath, so hot and sending a nice shiver up my body. I dropped into the water, it came up to my waist, I walked forward and let the water slowly rise to my chest. The rest of the girls came in and we all sat around a rock. I lowered myself so only my head was out of the water and let the illusion fade the water full of different healing properties making it not clear. 

“This feels amazing” Mina called out her voice happy as she moved to sit on the rock we were all crowded around. I nodded in agreement, the hot spring was lovely and just what my muscles desired after the day I had had. 

“You are to stop this at once Mineta. What you are doing is demeaning for both the girls and yourself” we all went silent at the loud voice of our class Rep and the seemingly hurried aquatic steps. What was going on over there? “It’s shameful behaviour” then it registered, Mineta was being a pervert as per usual. Why was he allowed within a hundred metres of any female I wasn’t sure. 

I wasn’t sure what Mineta had responded but judging by the loud bangs slowly going up the wall, he was climbing. How in the fuck was he climbing a straight wall? His quirk, I shivered. They were getting closer and none of the girls seemed to be able to move. 

“Get down here this instant” Iida once more, so he was climbing. I stood from the bath and sighed. I was tired, putting up my hands slowly I rose a wall around us. Mineta couldn’t look in. 

“He needs to find a hobby” I whispered and dropped back into the water as the rest of the girls looked over. I could see a few of them eyeing my shoulder. I froze and then an illusion went over the scar, it was fine. They’d think it was a mistake. 

“Before you become a hero, you should learn how to be a good human” I looked up and saw Kota at the top of the wall separating the girls and boys bathing areas. I let the illusion of us fall, as he pushed Mineta off the wall with a slap of his hand. 

“I’ll get you for this” Mineta yelled and then there was a scream, I think he landed on someone. I sighed and sunk lower into the pool. This was a lot for my mental capacity to take right now. Why was he in the hero course?

“Mineta is the worst isn’t he” Tsu croaked out in a quick reply. I nodded into the water not wanting to verbally respond like a few other of the girls did. I still wasn’t a fan of the child but I inwardly thanked him for being there. 

“Thanks so much, Kota-babe” Mina called out her arms rising to put thumbs up at the kid as she sat on the rock. We were all standing together and I watched as Mina smiled in thanks. “We owe you one” I didn’t owe him anything but I was thankful for him.  

He turned and looked at us and within a split second, he was falling off the top of the wall. I sighed, I was sure one of the boys was going to catch him. Perhaps he had a quirk of his own. 

“Lookout” I could hear the child being caught, I was right and it was none other than the green-headed Midoriya. See, the child was fine without my help. I just wanted to soak and then go to sleep. 

We soaked for a while longer and then it was time to leave and head to bed. As I walked out of the bath I covered myself in mist and made my way into the building to grab my full body towel. Covering myself I sighed out and grabbed my things as I made my way back to the room. I could have gotten dressed there but I wanted to change in the comfort of my room or at least the shared room. 

I walked down the hall and then into the room, opening my suitcase to grab my clothes and walked into the bathroom. I dried myself and got dressed, I was running on instinct and willpower at this point. Grabbing I pulled down the jumper over my pants and looked in the mirror. I wished I grabbed Bakugous, his jumper was a lot warmer than this one. I left the bathroom and got my bed ready for the night. The other girls were talking and having fun as I brought out all my chargers moving over to the wall to plug them in and remembered I hadn’t given Todoroki his charger. 

“Hey guys” I called out and the conversation stopped as I bent down to retrieve the charger I had packed for him “I’m just going to give Todoroki a charger he asked me to bring for him” I stood my eyes falling and tired “If I’m not back in twenty” I paused and shook my head “Come save me from Mineta”

“You got it” Mina replied and a few others nodded with smiles as I did too. “We will come and find you” she put up her thumbs and bounced on her bed happily. 

I bent down and got the PowerPoint I had bought and walked over handing it to the girls “Also I bought a PowerPoint so all of us could charge our phones. I didn’t expect there to be a lot of power points” I could see the love blossom in their eyes as I smiled and then left as I heard a chorus of thanks. 

I walked through the building making my way to the boys' rooms. It wasn’t too late but I was on the verge of passing out as I'm sure many of them were too. It was an easy find and I could hear some chatter. I walked up to the door and knocked lightly thrice all conversation stopped. 

“I’ll get it” Kirishima, he was always first to volunteer. I loved that we got along and that he was my friend. I heard quickened footfalls as the door was open and his face fell into one of confusion “Oh hey Y/N” he grew awkward “I thought you were Aizawa” I laughed as he moved from the doorway “Come in, how can we help you” 

Everyone was looking at me in my large jumper, short shorts and shin-high dinosaur socks I flushed and looked away shaking my hands “Oh no, I’m just here for Todoroki” that sounded weird. I looked over and now all the boys were looking to the duel haired male who was rolling out his bed. “I brought the charger you texted about” I held up the cord and he was walking over. 

“Oh, I forgot, thank you” his voice was smooth as I held out the cord “I could have gotten it in the morning” he answered, I shrugged and tilted my head with a light shake my head. “Thank you again Y/N” 

“No issues but I’m going to go before I pass out” I heard a few laughs as I turned to leave “Night boys” I called over my shoulder to the room full of my class. 

“Goodnight” It was all over the place and different voices chirping in all at once but I closed the door and began the walk back to my room. I loved my class with all my heart, they were so amazing and I couldn't’ ask for anything better. 

The walk was short and once I was back in my room I smiled at the jokes the girls were making that I arrived safely. Not too long after were we heading to bed. Lights out and chargers on we all laid down and I was out within seconds.

________________________________________________________________Chapter 9 

[tsukkeisimp]

Truth or Dare

A / N: so hi this is the first thing i’m posting here and it is part of a much longer project i have been working on (and that i plan on posting on here? maybe?). i wanted to share this small portion of it just to see if anyone would actually be interested in reading what i write. if it flops, i never posted it lol.

since this is such a small random part of my project some things might not make sense. so i’m gonna put here some details i think are useful to understand the fic better.

mc (i’m trying to give her a name) is a first year, she goes to seijoh and plays volleyball. eri and mika are her best friends and they’re on her team. she’s childhood friends with tsukki. mika likes oikawa, oikawa likes mc, iwa likes oikawa, mika is iwa’s sister, mc and tsukki are hopelessly in love with each other oop what?. (this is chaotic i know). this is all placed during tokyo camp and yes some girl teams are there too. if you read all this rambling... thank you, i appreciate you a lot. also this is my first time using tumblr i have no idea what i’m doing and english isn’t my first language. okay bye.

Genre: friends to lovers!!! fluff? tsukki simping for mc.

Pairing: tsukishima x reader

“I am soooooo bored!”

Hinata faked an exaggerated yawn after saying that and then pouted, when no one acknowledged his little act. It was 10.30 pm and most of the usually energetic and loud volleyball players had already gone to their rooms to rest; some were tidying up the gyms, after a bit of satisfying but really tiring individual training. and a couple were just outside the gyms, sitting on the grass, yelling and laughing at Hinata.

“Bored. How can he be bored? Does he seriously have any energy left?”

Tsukishima had his earphones on. But no music was playing. The earphones’ typical function had been taken away, and instead they were given a brand new purpose: they were a shield. They protected him from his teammates annoying attacks. From their rambling about how pretty the girls looked that day, their over the top conversations about nationals and their non sense laughing at everything. He didn’t have to be involved in any of this, thanks to his shield.

He casually sat there, staring blankly at the sky, trying so hard to block out all the noise, all the giggles, all the meaningless and unnecessary discussions that were happening.

There was one person who wasn’t fooled by the earphones’ trick though.

“Yo Kei, move over. Let me sit here.”

MC just came out of the gym she had finished tidying up. She had been practicing with Mika until late. They were trying to perfect some of the attacks they were planning to put into action during the friendly matches the following day.

She plopped down next to Kei, their shoulders brushing slightly against one another and her leg resting against his. She took his left earphone out and put it on. There was something incredibly familiar and comforting about that simple act. Suddenly the earphones’ function changed again. They weren’t a shield anymore. He didn’t need one when MC was next to him. The earphones were now like a soft fuzzy blanket, under which him and MC were alone. They were alone together. No annoying teammates allowed. No rambling about stupid stuff. He finally started to feel at peace. All the irritating noise that was becoming unbearable to his ears slowly faded away. He couldn’t help but give all his attention to the girl sitting next him. The noise was officially gone. He could only focus on the warmth of MC’s hand resting on his knee. Her heartbeat, still a bit accelerated after the intense training. The butterflies that were now dancing around in his stomach. Kei didn’t know exactly why or how MC was able to make him feel this way. But he was used to it. It had always been this way. And he liked it.

MC drank the last drop of water that was left in her water bottle and then placed it carefully next to her. Her mind was going over and over Mika’s words of advice regarding the few struggles they had during their last match. Despite the late hour she just couldn’t stop worrying, panicking and stressing. About not being good enough. She was usually pretty confident about her skills, but sometimes her brain liked to give her a hard time.

She was in the middle of giving herself a motivational speech, when Tsukishima’s words interrupted her internal monologue.

‘Are you worrying about your shit timing during blocks again?’

Tsukki had never been one to sugar coat his thoughts or to say half truths. He had always said it as he saw it. And even though a lot of times in the past he had hurt MC’s feelings doing it this way, she had learned to appreciate his brutally honest words. She sighed and nodded slightly.

‘You’ve been improving like crazy though. I think you’re gonna get it right soon if you keep working hard for it. And you never stop working hard so…’

‘I’ll get it right soon.’

‘Yeah you will.’

‘And then I’ll be better than you at everything!’

‘Don’t get ahead of yourself now.’

MC giggled and rested her head on Tsukki’s shoulder. A sense of complete peace and calm spreading through her whole body. She was about to close her eyes to appreciate better this quiet momet with her best friend when…

‘HEY HEEEEY HEY!

Hinata’s right. I am boooored! Let’s do something. How about... we play truth or dare?!’

Bokuto screamed his proposal as if it was the best idea ever.

‘Truth or dare…? What are we? Middle schoolers?’ Mika giggled a little and then looked up from her phone. She was surprised to see most people seemed rather amused with the suggestion and not disgusted like her.

‘Don’t be like that Mika… it could be fun! And we could uncover some secrets!’ Eri laughed, excited. Yachi, who was sitting next to her, couldn’t help but laugh with her and nod, approving of the idea.

Sitting in a circle that night was a weird group of people. Karsuno 1st years and Nishinoya and Tanaka were there, mostly because they wanted to hang out with the Seijoh girls. Mika, MC and Eri were there, with the 3rd years looking over them. Oikawa and Iwaizumi had joined because Iwa debated that ‘It’s not like I’m gonna let my little sister just hang out with you all alone’. Bokuto was of course there, Akaashi sitting next to him praying he wouldn’t get himself into trouble. Then some of the Nekoma guys and girls.

‘I don’t think I’m gonna get involved.’ Tsukishima stated. Putting his earphones back on.

Kuroo immediatly grabbed him by his shirt and dragged him next to him.

‘C’mon Tsukki dude, don’t be boring! Play one round!’

The game had been going on for 20 minutes. It had been pretty standard. Most people were choosing truth and the questions were always about volleyball. Who do you honestly think is the best spiker in this circle? And who’s the best setter? Do you think that team really has a chance at nationals? Who’s the best at receiving? And so on. A couple of the guys had chosen dare. Run around the gym 2 times. Do a handstand. Challenge this other guy at arm werstling.

It was Oikawa’s turn.

‘Truth or dare?’ Iwaizumi asked.

‘Dare.’

‘Kiss the prettiest girl in here.’

Iwaizumi knew exactly what he was doing. All Oikawa had been talking about for the past month was this girl. He didn’t know if it was a serious crush, but he definitely saw something in her. She had all of his attention, but she didn’t seem to care too much about it. Which was pretty stupid, Iwaizumi thought. Because anyone would be lucky to have Oikawa’s attention and care.

Everyone went silent. There hadn’t been any kissing yet, so it was exciting someone finally asked a question like that. But also gross and childish some would argue.

MC had gotten a little bored with the game, she wasn’t really paying attention anymore.In fact she was too busy looking at her phone to even notice Oikawa was right in front of her.

‘Huh?’ she looked up, confused. Everyone was looking in their direction. ‘Is it my turn already?’

A couple of the boys giggled, the girls were just staring, too curious to know if Oikawa was really going to kiss a first year.

‘Oikawa has to kiss the prettiest girl here.’ Iwaizumi repeated, to give her a little warning of what was about to happen. But it was too late. Oikawa was already pressing his lips against hers, everyone watching in a mixture of shock and amusement.

Iwaizumi looked away. Mika, who had been sitting next to MC for the whole game, moved uncomfortably closer to Eri, but she just couldn’t take her eyes off from what was happening. Her best friend and the guy she had always had the biggest crush on were kissing.

Nishinoya, Tanaka and Shoyo opened their mouths in shock and they were about to scream at Oikawa to keep it short, to stop it already. Five seconds had already felt like five minutes. They were about to scream, but MC beat them to it.

After a couple of seconds of pure shock and panic, MC finally realised what was happening and pushed Oikawa off of her.

‘What… I … what?’

MC was usually the type of person who always had something to say, a story to tell, an opinion to share, a compliment to pay. She never kept her mouth shut. But in that moment she truly was at a loss of words.

Tsukishima hadn’t really been paying attention to the scene. Until now. He was alarmed by MC’s silence.

He didn’t really care Oikawa was kissing his best friend. He wasn’t shocked, he already knew he liked her. And he knew she didn’t like him back. He had observed the kiss from afar, without feeling any special way about it. When he saw MC pushing Oikawa off of her, he was expecting to hear her laugh and say something sarcastic. Or to see her roll her eyes and scream at him that the kiss was disgusting.That didn’t happen though. It was only silence. From that lack of words and the absence of her usual laughter and sarcasm, Tsukishima understood something wasn’t right. He didn’t know what, but the expression on her face said it all to him. She was upset.

The game didn’t last long after that kiss. The tension became unbearable pretty quickly. It was unclear to everyone what the cause of this tension was. MC was awfully quiet. Mika had switched places with Eri, as if she didn’t want to sit next to her best friend anymore. Iwaizumi refused to high five Oikawa after the kiss and Nishinoya claimed he would’ve punched Oikawa first chance he got.

A couple minutes later they all agreed it was time to go to bed.

 ‘Kei...’

As they were all walking to their rooms, MC tugged Tsukishima by his shirt and whispered to him.

‘Mh?’ He tried not to look concerned, as if he hadn’t already noticed something was bothering her.

‘Can you talk for a minute?’

‘Yeah, I guess.’

They waited for everyone else to go into the bedrooms and then they walked outside again. Tsukki leaned on the wall, looking at the girl that had been his best friend for years behaving in a way he couldn’t quite read. He was going over what had happened in his head, analysing every little expression he catched on her face, every single sound. But he still didn’t understand.

‘Is something wrong? Did Oikawa bit your tongue or something?’ He chuckled.

What was an attempt to make MC laugh, made her blush violently instead. She was freaking out. That kiss came out of nowhere and disiorented her. She was not ready.

‘That was my first kiss.’ she spat out, sighing immediatly after and biting her lip nervously.

Tsukishima still didn’t really see the problem.

‘I know.’ he just said quietly.

‘I can’t believe that was my first kiss. I can’t believe I had my first kiss with Oikawa. I didn’t want it to be with him.’ MC’s leg was was bouncing up and down. It was something she always did when she was worried or concerned or stressed about something. It drove Tsukki insane.

‘Why did you let him kiss you then?’

‘’I- I… I didn’t let him! It all happened so fast. As soon as I looked up from my phone his lips were… there. God, this is a disaster. I can’t believe it just happened. Uuuugh.’ She let out a loud exasperated breath and covered her face with her hands. Her leg still going crazy.

‘… Whatever MC. It’s just a first kiss. Not that big of a deal.You’ll get other kisses. Plus it was barely a peck.’

‘I wanted my first kiss to be with someone I liked...or at least tolerated. But not fucking Oikawa.’

‘Just pretend it never happened. Pretend it doesn’t count.’

‘But I can’t stop thinking about it! Ah God…’

Tsukishima was quiet for a moment. He was really trying to think of a way to make his best friend stop panicking so much. He was tired and wanted to sleep and she looked sleepy too. He needed to find a solution and he needed to find it quickly.

‘Okay. I’m gonna give you a kiss right now. You can pretend this one is your first kiss and not Oikawa’s. You said you wanted it to be from someone you tolerate right? Unless you wanna go wake up one of the other guys… I can do it.’

MC’s leg didn’t stop bouncing, She thought about it for a moment and then nodded.

‘Mh… okay.’

Tsukishima didn’t think twice about it. He walked towards the girl, who was leaning against the wall, took her face in his hands and placed a short and sweet kiss on her lips. He felt her whole body relax under his touch and her leg finally stopped moving. Her back relaxed against the freezing cold wall of the building, but Tsukishima’s kiss was making her feel nothing but burning.

Tsukki had planned to break off the kiss after just a couple seconds, but his head was spinning so fast and the butterflies in his stomach were dancing so violently he just couldn’t stop himself. He wanted more. He wanted to stay that close to her just a little longer. He wanted to feel the soft skin of her cheeks against his hands just a little longer. He wanted to be intoxicated with her perfume just a little longer. He wanted to hold her and protect her just a little longer.

But just as he was wishing, praying, imploring for a little longer, MC decided that was actually enough for her. She didn’t need a little longer.

As the kiss ended, they both blushed violently and looked away from each other.

‘Night Kei… thank you.’ MC was grateful for her best friend. He had actually managed to make her stop thinking about Oikawa’s kiss. Kei’s kiss… actually made her heart feel something. Her brain was now only focusing on Kei’s hands on her face, Kei’s lips on hers, Kei’s flustered expression as they parted. She didn’t know why her heart felt like it was about to burst. She assumed it was because he was so so so special to her.

Kei’s heart also felt like it was about to burst. He knew exactly why though. He didn’t have to assume. He had just realised, as raging disappointment took over his body when MC ended the kiss before he was ready for it to end. He was in love with her. He was deeply in love with her. And he probably had been for a while. As quickly as he understood this though, another sudden realisation got clear into his head. She hadn’t been praying for a little longer like he did. He was certain she didn’t love him the way he loved her.

[wolfcha1k]

As soon as I started practicing kisses I suddenly can't help adding them now lmao something fluffy and firey for you heathens. Still sfw content tho ofc. Based on the new fanart I did recently so some of it doesn't match the art in hindsight :"D I think now its just gonna be a new tradition to write something to go along with my pieces.

They were taking one of their occasional adventures away from the Betterman Farm, where they would hunker down in the wilderness for several days at a time. For a while, Guy and Eep would forget there was an entire world that they shared with other people; their family. It was just the two of them, hunting and foraging and seeing the beauty the land itself provided.

She knew her home was the Farm now but her heart would never deny she was always meant for the untamed wild where the sun stretched on forever. She wasn't sure why Guy had lead her towards the desert as an area for camp, it was hot and unspeakably dry during the day, sweltering even. Her entire life had been the dusty desert and the canyon with that awful cave as the only escape from the heat.

As dusk fell, Guy had only grinned at her. They'd set up camp not long after the daytime sun joined the many nighttime suns in the sky. The sight of how many slept above her still was awe striking. Guy skinned a boar they'd hunted together, something Eep wanted to teach Dawn about someday. She knew as much as Guy enjoyed his safer, more pampered life with the Bettermans, he was still that adventurous nomad born and raised. He lived for the thrill his skills provided him and how all his ideas saved him from many obstacles.

Eep watched the fire flicker and sway, it was still surprising how alive looked. She leaned her hands out to toast her palms, the desert chilled now the sun set. She didn’t understand that either, how such a mercilessly hot place can become so cold.

The embers glowed in her green eyes when she felt Guy touch her wrist. Eep turned to him, seeing the fire reflecting in his dark gaze. He was beautiful, one of the most wonderful things she ever saw even after everything he'd shown her.

"I got the boar skinned, just need help putting a skewer through it," Guy said, gesturing towards the beast. They had parked themselves by an oasis, giving Guy a way to wash off the blood from his hands.

Eep had offered to do it, blood never phased her but Guy insisted she just rest. In the meantime she had bathed in the spring, the sand and sweat on her uncomfortable before settling down by the fire to wait on her mate. She hadn't wanted to admit it but she felt rather tired after the long trek. Guy had his reasons for picking this place but he could be so strange and peculiar about it in a way she never understood.

Perhaps that was why she loved him so much. There was nobody else in the world like him, even if she could only count the amount of people she knew on both hands.

Eep stood up from her crouching position. "Sure, I'm starving," she exclaimed, eying the pig carcass greedily. "Are you absolutely certain we can't just - "

"No, you are not sinking your teeth into that thing without cooking it first," Guy scolded her, it was more akin to when Ugga was telling off her children for causing mischief. "You'll get sick. I need to bring you back to Grug in one piece or I'll be in pieces."

"Fineeeee," Eep compromised with a dramatic sigh, leaning her neck back before walking over to help her mate spear the pig.

Eep with Guy’s help, well, mostly Eep but she liked making him feel useful, carried the spitted animal towards the campfire and held it over it. Guy had crafted some little makeshift contraption with wood and rope he'd packed, so they could use a pulley system to rotate the roasting boar

The two took alternating shifts.

"It's funny," Eep couldn’t help but muse suddenly, taking in the view. The fire made the golden sandstone burn a brilliant red color, reminding her of amber.

"What's funny?" Guy asked from his post by the pig, rotating it with a careful eye so it cooked evenly.

"Well…" Eep leaned her elbow on her bent knee, her chin on her hand. "We met in a desert and you asked me to marry you in one too."

Guy tried hiding his smile by turning back to cooking but Eep saw it, perceptive as always. He pretended to ignore her narrow eyed look. "Funny how fate works," he quipped and heard Eep snort in a very unadulterated fashion.

"You planned this," Eep accused him and Guy finally was forced to face the music because the boar didn't need this much turning on the spit.

"Me? Plan things? You must be mistaken," Guy quipped, his tone betraying him. His grin was wide. "Okay, you got me. Happy anniversary, or have you forgotten?"

"As if I can forget the night I nearly dashed your brains out with a rock," she said with more fondness than any normal person should, jumping to her feet.

Guy held her hands, leaning forward to nuzzle his nose against hers. "Me either, you're a hard one to forget."

"Well, I did call you back."

"You did," he agreed before pouting. "Not my smoothest pick up line though."

"So you didn't tell every girl that line? 'If you survive, call me?'" Eep quoted, exposing her teeth in a teasing smirk.

"Nope, you were the first and only," Guy assured her, winking. "It worked."

"It did," she agreed back, shaking her head with a giggle. "So…" Eep began coyly, averting her eyes towards the landscape colored black in silhouette.

"So…?" Guy urged her, knowing that Eep didn't need the coaxing but somehow it had just become their thing.

"What if I did come with you that night," Eep asked him, turning back to bat her eyelashes at him. "I think this is the perfect spot to humor the thought." She gazed around the desert, the ground hard with stone, much like the one she had followed Guy's fire that night.

"Well for one, your dad would have killed me because I didn't know he was part of the equation yet," Guy replied, both joking and serious as he said it. "This little journey would have definitely been way more interesting though if I had stolen you away from him."

"Stolen me," she echoed with a laugh though her ears burned from a mixture of the fire and thought. There had been an obvious attraction and two teenagers journeying alone, well, it didn't take a Betterman to figure it out. "You make this sound scandalous, Guy."

"It's not now though so that means when you took my hand, I'd do this." He lifted her palm to his lips, gently kissing a scar that led down to the pulse point of her wrist.

"No, you wouldn't have," Eep teased him. "You were too scared of me to try it."

"I wouldn’t," he agreed. "But this is a fantasy so anything can happen."

"Okay," she amused him, letting Guy continue his little story.

Guy seemed to realize a dark implication in this what if and since it was a fantasy, he could change that. "The world isn't ending, I'm still a nomad but you're just a stir crazy teenage girl instead."

"I am a stir crazy teenage girl," Eep corrected him, leaning up on her toes to brush his cheek with her nose. "And I'll remind you everyday, babe."

"You make telling this story harder than it needs to be," Guy lamented in mock offense, drawing her closer to eye her down. Eep just grinned innocently. "Stop putting plot holes."

Eep just giggled, feeling him turn her hand over to kiss her knuckles and each finger delicately. It was like having a butterfly touch her skin.

"Fine, then what?"

"We'd run away together," he continued, looking up at her with loving eyes. "Somehow outsmart your dad because Sandy would totally have sniffed us out in the morning."

Eep smirked, fighting off a broad smile in her amusement. "Would you have fought him?"

"I mean…" Sure, it was a fantasy but he was also just stronger, bigger and scarier than Guy was. Besides, hindsight wasn't twenty twenty and this caveman was now a second father to him. As annoying and abrasive as Grug had been in all the time Guy knew him, he also had a begrudging respect and admiration for him too. "Maybe we'd just bring him along anyway, save us the trouble."

"Is the log ride magic now?" Eep asked him with a wicked grin. "Does it fly us to Tomorrow? I'm sure it could if dad kicked it hard enough for us."

Guy scoffed, "This is my fantasy so there is no log."

"Aw, you're no fun," she sniggered, lifting his hand to press his palm into her nose fondly. "The log brought us together."

"Yeah but in this story you already came with me," Guy reminded her with a gentle tug, taking her hand back to stroke his thumbs fondly over her knuckles.

Eep tried hard not to laugh again, blushing as well under the soft look he gave her. He smiled at her and she melted like ice. It was intimate and vulnerable, more so than anything they'd done in all the time proceeding to this moment.

"Alright," she murmured, stroking his chest after laying her palm flat against his heart. She fiddled with the seashells dangling around his neck, idly stroking his throat and felt him swallow. "Then what?"

"I'd show you the world and since there's no The End… we wouldn't rush through it. You know, actually do some sight seeing. Fall slowly in love with each beautiful thing I show you but never seems to compare to you." Eep couldn’t help the giddy giggle as he called her beautiful, beaming bright like a sun ray at his compliment. Guy's eyes almost glazed over as he gave the silly romantic escapade story more thought, he chuckled. "Your dad would ruin all our little moments though, so it's kinda hard."

"So even in this little I went with you story, dad still keeps us apart?" Eep pouted.

"Every story needs conflict," Guy teased her. "Dad was going to catch up eventually, family in tow. We were taking the scenic route, it was bound to happen, Eep."

Eep rolled her eyes at him, tugging Guy down so they could sit with their backs to the fire. She leaned her weight against his side, feeling Guy rest his arm behind her back. "I hope things start getting more romantic for us, Guy."

Guy pressed a kiss to her temple, grinning. "It does. After hauling our crazy family cross country, we find the sun hidden on a mountain."

Eep remembered Guy's mountain, two tall twin peaks that extended high above the sky, swathed in clouds and extending out to a meadow after climbing the outcrop. They were supposed to ride it to Tomorrow, joining it among the many sleeping suns above. "How are we going to ride it to Tomorrow if I'm your Tomorrow?"

"I'm retconning stuff, stop spoiling the story," Guy scolded her, just resting his head on hers, taking in her smokey wild scent. "I realize this sooner, because the sun isn't really attainable. We go after it but it just gets farther and farther away." He extended his hand out in a reaching gesture. This meant Guy was really getting into the story.

"Are you sad for awhile?" Eep inquired, absently hugging his bicep now that Guy no longer held her hands.

"For a bit," he admitted. "I mean, my parents said to follow the sun but you really can't but…" Guy paused and gazed fondly at his wife tucked into his side, body warm, familiar and supple.

"But…?"

"I found you, light led me to you. I realize this and tell you I love you after this little journey." Guy nuzzled her cheek with a blissful little sigh. "Also then we find the Bettermans and live happily ever after in their treehouse with the punch monkeys."

Eep poked him in the chest, not really the reaction he was expecting after that happy ending. "You can't just skip an entire chapter like that and tack 'the end!'"

Guy took her hand in both of his, cupping it tender in-between his palms. "It works when your dad tells stories," he joked.

"Well, that was before you started telling better stories," Eep exclaimed with a childish huff that was so her it made Guy muffle a laugh into her shoulder.

"Did you tell Grug that?"

"You know how dad is," she replied a bit more sheepishly this time. "Least everybody doesn't die at the end anymore."

"They don't," he agreed, gazing at her fondly once again. "He's getting better though, I like happy endings."

"I like happy endings. I like you," Eep added, cuddling herself cozy as a cat under his arm and against his chest. She listened to his heartbeat, soothed by the gentle thump.

Guy stroked her back, gentle as he rested his chin above her head. "Only like?" He murmured.

"Maybe if you don't rush your endings then I'll say something else," she told him, Guy feeling her lips as she spoke against his heart.

Guy hugged her, adjusting his position so he could tug his wife onto his lap. She immediately curled up there, warm and safe as he draped his arms around her like a cocoon. "What if there is no ending yet? I like leaving our story open ended, Eep."

He suddenly found himself on his back and he gave a soft oof in surprise. Eep leaned over him, hands braced above his head as she looked down at him. The firelight made her already bright red hair even more so, blazing like the sun with the dark shadows making her eyes and face seem more intense.

"Then… I guess I can accept that," she relented after several moments, a smile crossing her face. She pressed her forehead against his, nose touching his.

Guy's eyes fluttered closed, knowing the intimate implications of the gesture amongst her people. He felt her breath fan his face before something soft touched his lips.

Immediately he wrapped his arms around her, letting his palms gently stroke the strong muscles of her back as they flexed beneath them. He'd never tired of her, beautiful and feral as she was. There was a soft gasp against his lips and he gave a quiet little growl, pressing up to mold his body with hers.

He found his words despite wanting to just keep kissing her. The moment was too right to neglect however. It took a few long moments of trading kiss after kiss that Guy had an idea to put his lips to good use in a way he wouldn't need to stop. Trailing a few heated kisses down the soft slope of her neck, he mumbled, "Eep?"

She hummed, "Mhm?" It was hardly the most direct of words but he took it.

"You lit a fire in me when we met," Guy confessed though he knew it was obvious at this point. It was no secret despite the circumstances of their relationship's beginning, he'd been infatuated and found her cute. Scary habits despite that, of course. "And you were in my every thought since then, I really was hoping you'd call me, Eep."

"I really wanted to go with you," she said, pushing him away to graze a palm down his bicep, tracing a stripe fondly before finding his hand to lace their fingers together. Her touch singed him more than the embers behind him did from where he lay. "I just…"

"You came with me eventually though," he reminded her though found he needed to remind himself to focus when she lifted his hand to her lips to kiss his longer fingers. He closed his eyes, sighing. "You gave me something even better than any Tomorrow I thought I'd find out there."

"Even if you were a stupid boy?" She teased him through the haze, bracing her weight against his again. She still sometimes made fun of him for that but in the moment he hardly cared, caging her in his arms.

"Yes," he grunted, Guy would agree to anything she said right now so long as she kept touching him like this.

Their lips met again but she suddenly paused, her roaming hands no longer roaming. He huffed against her lips, confused and a bit frustrated that she stopped.

"Guy?" Eep murmured against his lips breathily.

"Mhm?" It wasn't an intelligible response but having Eep so close to him like this always rendered him a useless fool.

"Do you smell something burning?" Eep drew away, ignoring Guy's protesting whine as their lips no longer brushed.

"Just my love for you," he told her, sitting up with what he hoped was a winning smile.

Eep flared her nostrils at the smell and eyes widening looked past Guy towards their camp fire, having completely forgotten about the cooking boar during their recent activities.

"Guy, the boar is on fire," she exclaimed.

Guy in an instant scrambled to his feet to try salvaging their dinner. "Oh crap!" He ran for a waterskin and a blanket but to Eep it was probably a fruitless endeavor.

She was never much of a picky eater anyway. Sometimes some burning did a meal good, she thought, touching her lips with a grin.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #442

“the more you suffer, the more it shows you really care, right?”

Would you ever sell your soul? No. Do you believe that something is going to happen in 2012? Welp, clearly not. I never believed it. Have you ever been to the Grand Canyon? No, but I'd love to! When was the last time you slept in someone else’s bed? Uhhh not since I visited Sara, I think. Do you like your music loud or at a reasonable level? Loud, for sure. Louder than I should listen to. Did the last person you kiss have a tattoo? No. What’s the last song you heard? "The Bird and the Worm" by The Used. Has anyone told you they missed you lately? No. What are you most likely to do when you’re exhausted; take a nap, drink some coffee, or go for a run to get yourself pumped up again? Naps definitely win. What are you most likely to pick if you got to choose your topic on a research paper; drug abuse, mental illness, or the death penalty? Mental illness, for sure. What is your favorite month of the year and why? October, bc aesthetic. What’s your least favorite animal? Probably wasps. They're mean fuckers that kill bees. What was your class song when you graduated? Some super shitty country song. Have you ever had to spend the night outside (not camping)? No. What`s the scariest living animal that you`ve petted? A tarantula, I'd say. She was a sweet rose hair that I literally did pet, which you absolutely should not do to tarantulas, but I knew nothing about them at the time. The urticating hairs on their abdomens cause serious itching, and I tell ya, that sure happened. So did you play old school Nintendo or Atari or Sega? If so which one? We had an old Atari for a long time. When/where did you meet your first love? In the hallway, during my sophomore year of high school. Is there anyone you dislike, that you have to see/speak to regularly? Hm, what qualifies as "regularly," really? I don't like my sister's husband, who I see semi-regularly, but I don't really talk to him. Does your family eat any unique foods for Thanksgiving that aren’t the norm? If so, what are they? Nah, not that I can think of. If you eat oatmeal, do you add water or milk to it? What is your favorite flavor? Milk; I don't like it with water. I only eat the apples and cinnamon kind. Was the last video you watched on YouTube a music video? If not, what was it of? It's a let's play. Have you ever been brave enough to cut your hair in a very different way? If you have, did you regret your decision after? Yes, and I still love it. What was the last book you had to read for school? Did you enjoy it, or were you just trying to get through? The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. I loved it. Has anyone you know personally ever won the lottery? If so, how much did they win? Would/have you ever play(ed) the lottery? No to both questions. I have a very addictive personality, so I don't really mess with dangerous things that might tempt that behavior. What band/celebrity/etc. do you know the most information about? Who would you like to learn more about? Markiplier, ha ha. As for who I'd like to know more about... hm. Have your friends met the last person you kissed? Girt has. Who has made the biggest difference in your life? Jason. You get a text from someone saying that they want to hang out - who would you most like it to be from? Also Jason. -_- What is the name on your birth certificate (feel free to withhold your last name for privacy reasons)? Brittany Marie is all you need to know. Even if shopping isn’t your favorite... every girl has a favorite store. What’s yours? My favorite physical store is Hot Topic, but my favorite store overall is Rebel's Market, which I'm pretty sure is just an online source. Which type of undies do you wear most: Thongs, bikini/briefs, bootyshorts, or granny panties? Don't you dare laugh, I prefer "granny panties" lmfao. They're what I'm comfortable in, okay. How many nail polishes do you have, if you were to take a guess? *I* have none. Idk about Mom, but I know not a lot. Are you on birth control? Do you use condoms? I use birth control to regulate my period and ease cramps. If I was sexually active though, both would be musts for me. When did you start your period? How did you react? Who did you tell first? When I got home from school sometime in middle school. I don't remember exactly how old I was, but I was EXTREMELY upset. Like, I cried, because I didn't feel like a kid anymore. My mom was the first to know. Have you ever had sex while on your period? If so, would you ever do it again? NO NO NO NO THAT SOUNDS SO GROSS LKASDFJ;AJW;LKERJA;WEJLRKQWLKE;JR. Which way do you swing (boys, girls, or both)? I'm bi. Or pan. I really don't know. Tell me ALL about your longest/most serious relationship. Are you still in that relationship? How about I don't, because doing that I'm sure will send me in a PTSD spiral. No, we're no longer together. Who is your ALL TIME best friend (don’t count your boyfriend, either, silly!)? Sara. I don't think I've been as close with any other best friend. Which one of your friends has the best singing voice? SARAAAAAAAAAAA. What shade are you in foundation or concealer? I don't have a clue. I don't wear either. Have you ever showered with someone? Boy or girl? Were you completely naked? "Were you completely naked." No, I shower with underwear on. I've showered with my little sister as well as my best friend as a kid. I've never shared a shower as an adult and don't want to. Do you think you’re good enough for the person you like? No. Are you a cuddler or no? If I'm really into you, YUP. And if it's not hot. Wouldn’t it be kinda annoying to have to share a bed every night? No. I miss it sometimes. Have you ever walked on a beach at night? Yes. It's beautiful. Could you go the rest of your life without drinking alcohol? Pretty easily, yeah. Would you marry someone you didn’t love if you were paid 10 thousand dollars? No. I just wouldn't be able to stomach doing that. I'm solely marrying for love. Have you had sex today? I haven't in many years. Do you still care about your last ex? Very very much! Do you own more then one bathing suit? Nope. Is there any alcohol in the fridge? Yeah, but none I like. Who have you recently made up with after fighting? Nobody. Who do you WANT to make up with? Jason. Megan. Do you get scared easily? Hm. It really depends on the situation. Have you seen UP? Never the full movie, actually. I need to. How many coats of mascara do you use? I use it so rarely that I barely know. Two, maybe? What’s your favorite bracelet? The one Sara gave me. I used to always wear it, but it's worn down with time and is too loose for me now, so it's just with my jewelry. What color hair does your mom have? It's naturally gray now, but she dyes it black. Favorite song to listen to when you are mad? "Headache" by Motionless In White does it. What restaurant would you want to work at? NONE. I ain't working with hungry people. I don't want to work with people - period. When people ask “how are you?” do you say “good” even if you aren’t? Depends on who's asking. If it's a stranger or someone I barely know, odds are I'm just going to reply with "fine" or something like that. Were you honestly a good kid? Yes. Is anything wrong with your eyes? I have to wear glasses, so. Have you kissed or hugged anyone today? No. What is your mom’s and dad’s favorite TV show? I don't really know for either. Mom watches loads of shows, and I don't live with Dad, so. I know he really likes The Big Bang Theory, though, which Mom also loves. Have you ever suspected your mom or dad of having an affair? No, but ~supposedly~, Dad did with his now-wife. I don't know what the fuck is true between my parents, though. Do you think buying second hand clothes is gross? It depends on the type of clothing (ex., used underwear is a huge fucking no), as well as the state it's in. Does it gross you out when your parents kiss? They're divorced. That would be incredibly weird, uncomfortable, and impossible with how I know at least Mom feels towards Dad. Do you have a playlist made on YouTube? Yeah, multiple. Do you like dollar stores? I mean, sure? They have good deals occasionally and are a good option to stop for a quick snack or something. Mom doesn't actually *shop* in them, though. What’s the last thing you bought from one? I think a honeybun. Do you think it’s weird how babies are made? Well, yeah. Science can be crazy, though. Have you ever lost a friend over the opposite sex? No. Are you comfortable in a short skirt? I wouldn't be comfortable in ANY skirt. Do you and your family go on a vacation ever year? We essentially never do. Vacations cost money. We don't have money to spare. When you were going out with your last ex and you had the chance to date your celebrity crush, would you have left your bf/gf for them? No, because it's not like I know him personally, while I know her very deeply. Who was your most romantic moment with? Jason. Do you sweat easily? Like you wouldn't BELIEVE. A side effect of one (or even multiple) of my meds is hyperhidrosis, so I can sweat an ocean in two minutes, it seems. It's disgusting, and I am so self-conscious about it. What’s one memory you wish would just vanish? Just a specific moment with Jason that is particularly agonizing to recall. Are you in love with someone? No. Partying or watching a movie? Partying isn't my thing. I'd have more fun watching a movie with friends. What pisses you off the most? Child molesters/rapists, probably. Where do you want to be at a year from now? I just want a job by then, dude. I also hope I've lost a lot of weight. Do you like pickles? Only dill pickles. If you saw someone broken down on the side of the road, would you stop to help? Honestly, no. I don't trust people. What do you do with your plastic grocery bags after you unload your things? We put our plastic bags into one big bag for later use. Have you ever slept in a water bed? Yes. How often do you use Flickr? I don't. I only ever check my friend's for meerkat photos, ha ha. Share three nice memories you have of the person you fell hardest for. No, unless you want me to cry. Have you ever made any of your friends cry? Not deliberately of course, but yes. Do you look decent in your most recent photograph? God no, I look high. Out of all the guys you know, who would you trust to not cheat on you? Girt. I know he never would, especially because HE'S been cheated on. How do you plan on disciplining your children? NOT by physical means, I can tell you that much. If I actually had kids, I'd teach them through (hopefully) primarily deeply talking things out. If need be, there'd be time out, grounding, things like that. I do NOT support methods like spanking your kid, so that's a big no. If you could live in another country, would you? What country? Yes; Canada. If you could change your name, what would you change it to? Quinn, probably. What’s one health problem you wish you didn’t have? It's a tie between depression and anxiety. What is your cure for hiccups? NOTHING works for me. It's the worst. Did you ever do anything in class that annoyed other students? I mean, I don't think so. Have you used a Ouija board and had a freaky experience with it? I've never messed with one, and I don't want to. I don't know if I believe in their supernatural abilities or not, but I ain't fuckin around and finding out. Do you stick with a political party, or vote for who you like best? I pick based on their policies and morals, not necessarily their party. Do you know anyone who is an albino? No. Word search or crossword puzzle? Word searches. When you watch a game show, do you like to see people win or lose? Aw, who wants to see them lose? It's great to see people win and be so excited. Do you have a pair of fake redneck, vampire, etc. teeth? No. What is your favorite Pixar film? Finding Nemo. Do you get really mad when you lose a game? Not at all. I'm not very competitive, and games are about having fun. When was the last time you used a pay phone? I actually don't think I ever have. Who did you have your most amazing kiss with? Jason. Do you go to church every Sunday? I never go to church as I'm not religious. If you had to get famous for one of the following, which would you choose: music, acting, writing, modeling? Writing. What do you think of girls with huge boobs that don’t wear bras in public? Who the fuck cares. If they're comfortable and at least have a shirt on, let 'em. Most women have breasts, big whoop. Do you even like politics? God no. What’s it like at raves? Oh god, I'd never go. Have you ever had a dream in which you were making out, or more, with someone? lol yes

[tuesdayx]

So I thought it would be fun to do a song-by-song breakdown of our latest album Essential.

Essential started as some rough demos designated for a side project in late 2019, which then became our largest album to date in terms of song selection. Many of the themes deal with learning to cope with the changing world thanks to Covid, with a perspective of someone who had to keep working at an "essential" job with no option of self-quarantine. I was happy to continue working and being able to pay my bills over the past year, but there was always elements of stress, fear, and tension lingering over myself and everyone else in my position.

So here we go; starting from the top let's look at the Songs of Tuesday X's 6th album Essential.

1. Jet Fuel Can't Melt Steel Beams: the title was a reference to the 9/11 conspiracy memes, which as stated in the opening lines, "has nothing to do with this song." Written in January of 2020 before Covid had made any significant impact in the US, the song touches on many themes which happened to occur throughout the year, such as [another] Californian forest fire (Australia too), new diseases (Covid), a riot (the BLM movement over the summer, which I will state everything that movement has been fighting for is 100% justified and the United States is in desperate need of Police reform, as does our political system which has remained inherently racist to this day.), Civil War (and exaggeration for sure, but the civil unrest and political division in our country will soon split us apart further), more corporate giants(companies like Amazon profited more from this Pandemic than ever before and have helped further the gap between the American working class and the top 1%). Favorite line: "I won't get philosophical, I only wanted your attention."

2. The Only Difference Between You and Me is a Sense of Apathy and Your Brand New Nikes: This song is a blithing criticism of the American political system. Our two party system has left Americans with a choice between "the lesser of two evils" and allows politicians with no true interest in our needs to rise to power. The use of 3rd parties as an alternative is a overly simple compromise that would only just begin to alleviate the problems created in our political system. Both of our main parties are considered conservative parties to the rest of the world, and any progressive measures that would benefit society and reduce the effects of climate change are considered radical and preposterous by politicians with financial stakes in our crooked system where corporatations hold control and the people are treated as fuel for an otherwise worthless currency. Favorite line: "Listen to the radio, they played my favorite song. Now I'm bored and wanting more."

3. Blame it on the Elves: the title is a reference to an episode of the Podcast "Lore" by Aaron Menke (i can't recall which episode, but you should check it out anyway because it's great listen.) An instrumental interlude inspired by ragtime music of the 1920-30's, with an edge of course.

4. Class of Dropouts: This song was written when I was 16 during my sophomore year of high school and was originally featured on my now unavailable album "trees" before adopting the Tuesday X monicker. I brought it back 6 years later because I loved how raw and punk it was. The lyrics are dorky but I decided to leave them as is, it's a cool track for high school stoners to blare and let out their teen angst. Favorite line: "Walking in on my friends fucking."

5. Polaroids on My Bulletin Board: This is a song about growing up. As a 22 year old (now 23) who decided not to go to college straight out of high school, I felt isolated from my peers in a way. By going into the workfield right away I sometimes feel like I skipped a few years and missed out on a lot of opportunities. I regret not leaving my hometown sooner than I did and chasing my dreams of being a touring musician in a band. More often than not I reminisce of my youth playing shows and getting into trouble, as I now feel old and out of place in a scene I grew up in. Favorite line: "I know what it's like to be alive, I know what it's like to live a lie."

6. Labradoodle Underpass: Going back on the theme of growing up, this is about my recent experience with shows as an adult. When I was a teenager I felt ambitious and ready for anything, and I would drop literally everything to go to the nearest show. As an adult I feel introverted and constantly anxious about the world around me. I've missed out on a lot of great shows due to my own self doubt's and anxiety. Now that shows have been canceled for over a year I feel even more regret by not appreciating them more while I could. Favorite line: "23 years and a lingering fear that anything could happen, why am I here?"

7. Some Shit: This was me trying to be modest mouse lol jangly guitars and half talking/half singing vocals describing the world around me. I guess in a way it was an exercise in writing character description and setting, but otherwise it's just a chill track that almost feels aimless at parts. Favorite Line: "it's just some shit I learned from a friend. Just some shit I learned when I was trying to prepare."

8: Woe is the World: On the album this is a chorus snippet that barely a minute long (the full version is available as a bonus track on bandcamp, and it was actually a demo that turned out better than the final version.) I originally wrote this song when I was 15 with a different set of lyrics, but I came back to it while writing this album and re-wrote it to reflect my mental state and the world around me. Overall, just another melancholy track in a sea of melancholy songs. Favorite line: "you've never felt more alone than you do now, was everything worth it in the end?"

9. Then Why Was it Named Gideon?: the title is a reference to a line in Scott Pilgrim's Finest Hour (my favorite series) and like the first track on this album doesn't have much to do with the song. "Gideon" is a simple love song, talking again about how growing up sucks but having the right person by your side can make all the shitty times worth it in the end. Favorite line: "it's time to move on, you're taking too long."

10. I am Here, I'm Looking at Her, and She is Beautiful: This song is entirely about the book "Perks of Being a Wallflower". That's it. Nothing else, let's move on. Favorite line: "Over Christmas I read them a poem about a brown paper bag and the boy who wrote it."

11. Try to Be a Filter, Not a Sponge: Like the previous song, this one is also mostly about "Perks of Being a Wallflower", but with elements of my own experience with toxic relationships. I like to think of it as the character Charlie's experience with Mary Elizabeth overall though. Favorite line: "She called my favorite book washed out trash, said I have no taste and I'm still too sad."

12. Lavender Spray Bottle: This instrumental dates back to 2017. I recorded the guitar part as a demo on my phone and forgot about it. Over time I forgot how to play the guitar part, so I used the demo as a basis and layered everything else on top of it. The title is a reference to a bottle of water with lavender essential oils mixed in that my ex used to fend away spiders in the house we lived in at the time.

13. Hindsight is 2020: I will admit, this is my favorite song on the whole album and was actually the last to be written and recorded. With a simple guitar part and layers of vocals, this song is a direct reflection of life during the peak of the pandemic. With curfews in place and rising case counts, I had to learn to cope with life at home during my late nights away from work. My partner was quarantined during this time and I reflected on the mental strain this put on her. Favorite line: "Don't go to work, you need the money but you're not happy when you're there. Sometimes life is so unfair."

14. I Don't Know How to Deal With Serious Emotions Without Turning Them into a Fucking Joke: the title came from a meme I found on my phone from high school. The song itself was about my own inability to handle serious emotions without coming off as sarcastic. In both the music and lyrics, the song starts as a simple confession before exploding into raw chaos. Favorite line: "it's so hard. I'm so scared, what have I become?"

15. Say Hello to My Little Friend: the last instrumental on this album. A short haunting tune that reflects the final two tracks. The title is probably a reference to Rambo or something, but I never watched it and I thought it fit the feeling of this song.

16. Minneapolis: What became one of the most emotional tracks on this song actually began as a joke. My partner was snap chatting a friend one night and they asked me to write them a song on the spot. So I improvised the first two verses and chorus of this song, referencing her going to school there at the time. I found I actually liked what I had written however, so I refined the track and changed it from a sassy country song into a melancholic lament of my experience in the twin cities and southern Minnesota. Favorite line: "I miss Camp Snoopy, and Paul Bunyon's log flume ride that went around the whole damn mall."

17. Before the Sunrise: the final song on the album is an intimate look at my relationship with my partner. Through past experiences i have become riddled with self doubt and always looking at improving myself as a person. With hopes that one day I'll be the person I'd like to be for mine and their sake, it's an optimistic tribute to my best friend. Favorite line: "the cycle ends until the sun rises again, you're my best friend."

Thank you all so much! Check out Essential and our other music on Bandcamp, Spotify, Apple, and other places! I hope you all enjoyed this personal look at these songs that got me through the worst parts of 2020.