#i am nearly 30 and this is how I spend my free time

[thebubblesareevil]

Family grows, it evolves…

Part 1, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

There was a new exhibit on Ancient Greece at the museum, and as the resident expert Diana was given free range of the exhibit. Normally this wouldn’t be an issue, normally the League doesn’t find a clone of one of its founding members and spend a, frankly, ridiculous amount of time deciding how to proceed.

Diana sighed as she looked at the large room filled with artifacts needing to be catalogued before display. She lamented not having the same speed as the flash for but a moment before getting to work. It was 5:00, if she wanted to get any sleep tonight, she needed to get to work.

She steadily made her way through stacks of paperwork, working with the efficiency that was drilled into her since birth. It had been hours since she began her work, and though she tired, she resolved to head home to get changed for the next day. It wasn’t until she made her way from the basement that she realized something was off. Doris was sitting at reception, though she should have left at 8:00, the sun was still high in the sky, not yet ready to make its decent.

“Calling it an early night, Diana?” Doris asked “Big day tomorrow! Finally setting up the new exhibit. I can’t wait to take the kids, they’re so excited to see it.” She said with a wide smile. Diana surveyed the desk, catching a glance the clock. There in bold numbers and as 7:00pm, she smiled as she replied.

“I finished things up sooner than planned, so I thought I’d head out for the night. I need to get dinner started before my guest arrives.” Doris’ face nearly split in two.

“A guest, is he handsome, oh how could you hold out on me Diana!?” She said excitedly “I need all the details!” Diana laughed.

“Nothing like that, my Grandfather decided to pop in for a surprise visit. I haven’t seen him in quite some time, so it’s a lovely surprise.” Doris nodded along.

“You’re a good grandkid. I miss my grandparents everyday, you never know how much time you’ve got.” She said with a sigh. “Have a good night!”

“All the time in the world.” She said to herself, checking her watch and grinning. It read 4:30 am, she yawned as she left, making her way back to her apartment.

Everything thing was silent when she arrived, though that was to be expected at this point. She wade her way to the kitchen passing by the figure on the couch.

“Would you like some tea? Do you drink at all?” She inquired.

“I am perfectly capable, though I rarely indulge.” He replied in a monotone voice, if she had been anyone else she like would not have caught the edge of sadness clinging to his voice. Diana set the kettle on the stove and made her way over to the couch.

“Something troubles you, something big enough to approach me after all these years.” Clockwork smiled “You’re much sharper than your father ever was” the smile dropped.

“You are aware of the multiverse.” He said, Diana nodded. “As the Master of time, I bear witness to each world, each time line. There exists a world where humans built a bridge to the Infinite Realms, creating a being both born and killed by the infinite.” Diana gave him her upmost attention. “Sometime ago I was tasked with the elimination of this creature, this child, to prevent the tragedy he would bring upon that world.” He smiled “I was never one to listen to orders though, and instead I set the boy on a path that would bring about great change… it had unexpected side effects.”

“What kind of side effects?” Diana asked, worried.

“He began to cling to me, seeking me out for advice. I even found him asleep in my clock tower more than once. I have admittedly come to see him as my grandson.” Clockwork have a soft smile “He reminded me so much of you when we first met.” He sighed “I am here to ask a favor, young Danny is approaching a crossroads. There are two possible paths his timeline might take, one where he lives of the rest of his years moving between living in dead, his truth hidden from those who wish him harm. However there is another path, one I fear is becoming more and more likely than the last.” Diana had never seen her grandfather look so old, his entire form shifting to match his tone.

“What is it? What is going to happen?” Clockwork looked at her with sad, tired eyes.

“He will be betrayed, from this betrayal he will suffer such agony that the Realms themselves will retaliate. Then he will sleep eternal, bound to the infinite. His world destroyed.” Diana gasped. She placed a hand over his,

“What do you need me to do?” She asked firmly.

“Should the worst come about, I intend to steal him away from that world. Cutting off its connection to the realms permanently. However he is a being of both life and death, he cannot neglect his human half. What I ask of you is this, that you allow this boy to stay here, with you. There is no one else I would trust with such a task.” Diana hesitated.

She was a warrior, trained for battle from birth. She knew nothing of caring for a child. She thought her grandfather intended for her assist him in battle but this…. She looked at her grandfather, his sad eyes resigned, as though he expected her to refuse.

“Very well, on one condition.”

“Anything my dear.” She smiled.

“You must visit more, when last we met I told you I needed time. You gave me that, now I ask once more for time, time spent together.” She nearly jumped as his form shifted to that of a child.

“Nothing would please me more.”

“And grandfather? Should the worst not pass, I would still like to meet tho cousin of mine.” Clockwork froze, before he practically melted.

“Of course.” His form shifted once more to that of a young adult. Diana smiled pulling her grandfather into a hug.

“Thank you.” He whispered and he was gone. The kettle screamed. Diana got ready for a long nights rest.

—————————

A week passed before she heard anything from her grandfather. It was to the night before the opening of her new exhibit and she expected everything to go as planned. Just as she was picking out what she was going to wear to the gala, the sound of cars outside her window stopped.

“What do you think? Red or black?” She asked as she turned around holding the two dresses. Her grandfather stood tall, a stern look on his face. Diana set down the dresses. “It happened, didn’t it?” Clockwork nodded. Making his way towards the living room he stopped by the couch. There, asleep on her couch was a young teen, not much older than some of her teammates protégés. He had pitch black hair and pale skin, with lightning scars crawling up his neck. He chest did not move.

“He’s not breathing!” She turned to her grandfather, but he appeared unbothered. He smiled, watching the boy sleep.

“As I said before, he is a being of both life and death, sometime pieces of one form bleed into the other.” He turned to Diana, “He needs his rest, as for your first question, the blue dress will suit you much better on this occasion.” Diana gave him a soft smile.

“Come, I shall make us some tea while you tell me more about my cousin.” Clockwork nodded, taking a moment to readjust the blanket around the teen, before heading to the kitchen.

——————-

When Danny woke, to the sound of people talking he had a horrid migraine. He did his best to ignore the pain as he tried to remember where he was. The last thing he remembered was a dream of his parents yelling and the GIW knocking down their door. He slowly sat up, looking around the room, every wall was covered in pictures. Danny slowly stood and made his way over to the pictures. They all took place over varied times, ranging from, at the earliest, the 1920s all the way to the 2000s. All of the featured the same woman, she remained unchanged even as those around her grew old.

He listen to the voices, one familiar, one not, as he made his way towards the source of the noise. When he opened the door he was greeted by the familiar face of Clockwork. Next to him was the woman from the photos just as unchanged.

“Good afternoon Danny, did you rest well?” Danny did his best to disguise his flinch at the sound, grinning at the old ghost.

“Just fine thanks, what….what exactly happened? Where are we?” Confusion dripping from his voice.

Clockwork looked Danny in the eye, what he said next nearly broke him.

“I’m so sorry, Danny.”

Danny’s legs almost gave out under him. “It happened didn’t it? They tried to turn me in, to the GIW. That wasn’t a dream.” The ancient stayed silent, Danny's eyes went wide. "Is Jazz okay!? She... she was upstairs... if they hurt her!" Clockwork stopped him.

"Your sister is fine, they were only there for you." Danny took a deep breath, trying to process everything.

"So what comes next? Where are we?" Clockwork looked at him with a deep sadness.

"We are in a world separate from your own, connected by the Infinite Realms. I saw the possibility of what was to come and made arrangements. Due to the crimes of your world against you, the Observants and myself decided the best course of action would be to remove you from your world, and cut the living off from the Infinite Realms entirely." Danny looked down, resigned to knowledge of what they planned to do to him. "As you know, as a half-ghost you must tend to both sides of your being." Clockwork turned to the woman, "Danny, this is my granddaughter, Princess Diana of Themascyra. She has agreed to have you stay here, with her." Danny frowned.

"Your granddaughter? But she's...uhh" he paused, not sure how to continue. Diana laughed.

"Alive? Yes, I do believe I am. I'm assuming my grandfather has neglected to explain his past life" Danny nodded "How much do you know of the stories Ancient Greece?"

"More than most I think, there are a lot of constellations named after the myths. That and it's hard to visit Pandora and NOT get an hour lecture on Greece" Diana's eyes went wide.

"You know Lady Pandora? How wonderful, I grew up hearing stories of her bravery!” She smiled “That being said, that will make things a bit easier. My mother is Hippolyta, her desire to have a daughter was so great that she molded me from sand, Zeus, king of the gods, used his power to give me life.” Danny blinked once, then twice.

“So…you’re a Demi-god? I don’t understand how that makes you Clockworks granddaughter.” Diana smiled. “I mean, I know Clockwork probably used to be Chronos, Jazz and I had a whole debate about that, but what does that have to do with Zeus?” Diana smiled patiently.

“Danny, Chronos is the primordial god of time, yes?” Danny nodded “Okay, well he is also the primordial form of Kronos, the father of Zeus, my father.” Danny froze, looking over to Clockwork who merely nodded, as though Danny’s brain was currently trying to shut down. After a moment the dots finally seemed to click.

“YOU ATE YOUR KIDS?!?!”

Clockwork sighed, Diana laughed, Danny had a mental breakdown.

It took close to five minutes for Clockwork to fully explain as Diana grinned in the background drinking her tea. Once he calmed down, Clockwork finished continued expaining.

"As for your ghostly half, I will be providing plenty of ectoplasm for you to eat as well as bringing you to the Infinite realms each week until you learn to create portals of your own." Danny nodded.

"What about school? Or hell, anything really. I don't exist in this world, how exactly do I go about doing anything?" Clockwork smiled.

"I called on the power of the ghost writer for any legal documents and I personally filed them in the proper time period to ensure you have what you need. I have given those to Diana" she nodded "as well as giving her legal custody of you. As far as the law is concerned you are her recently orphaned cousin. Son of her estranged Uncle Haiden and Aunt Penelope, who tragically died a few days ago." Clockwork smiled, rising from his seat.

"I'm afraid I have over stayed my welcome, I think it's best I take my leave and allow the two of you time to acquaint yourselves better." Danny stopped Clockwork, giving him a hug he whispered.

"Thank you." Clockwork gently carded his fingers through his hair before stepping back.

"If either of you need anything, just ask." and he was gone. Suddenly there was an influx of noise coming from outside, just enough to tell them that the world outside was moving once more.

Danny stood awkwardly by the chair their grandfather was occupying.

"You know, I don't bite." Diana said, trying to break the ice.

"I do." Danny replied on reflex, before covering his mouth. He looked at Diana, she looked back before they both burst out in peals of laughter.

"This is so weird, what even is my life?" Diana wiped a tear from her eye.

"Well, considering one of my teammates dresses up as a bat and beats up criminals, while another talks to fish, I think it's safe to say neither of our lives can be considered normal." Danny broke out in another fit of laughter.

"No shit?" he asked. Diana lifted a single brow at the term.

"No shit."

"What kind of team are you on exactly? Extreme cosplaying? Underwater battle royale?" Diana smirked.

"How about we get you some food and I tell you all about it?"

Danny smiled "Sounds like a plan."

@a-salty-sal@impulsiveasshole@meira-3919@alcorbearson@cute6troll@samgirl98@skulld3mort-1fan@addie-lover-of-stories@amercurio@chronicallyonline-fandomwh0r3 @heirxofxtime @gin2212 @thegatorsgoose@wanderer-of-worlds@terzatheunderscorerima@bright-shade@satanicrutialspecialist@mur-ururu@birdie-24-05@ascetic-orange@cyber-geist@thatrandomsarahchick

[forgot-how-catflap-works]

Hot take: Sisyphys got a sweet deal

We must imagine Sisyphus happy, according to existentialist philosopher Albert Camus. It’s one of his hottest and most widely known takes. The idea that when confronted with the meaninglessness of his existence, condemned for all eternity to push a boulder up a mountain only for it to roll back down, dear old Sisyphus may find contentment. What other choice does he have after all? 

(Showing my age here with the rage face meme and will not apologise #MillenialPride)

The assertion is that we mortals are faced with a similar conundrum. Life is unpredictable, chaotic, and frequently terrifying. With nothing but the infinite void to look forward to, how are we to spend our days? Either we embrace religion and pray for eternal salvation, skip the queue to the void by killing ourselves because it doesn’t make any difference in the end, or laugh at the absurdity of it all and find joy in the simple act of being here. It is up to us to create our own meaning. 

On my good days this notion provides me a lot of comfort, and links in nicely with the zen buddhist idea that this moment is the only thing we truly have. So the take home is to embrace it, and live fully for the moment. It’s all very Dead Poets Society or, if you’re like me and have never seen that film, the B plot in Season 1, Episode 3 of Community.  In the immortal words of Professor Whitman, “Seize the day Jeff, for real. Go running naked in a hailstorm, kiss a girl in the middle of the day, fly a kite but do it for yourself! Or you wot just fail my class, you’ll fail life.” 

On my bad days however, I’m just salty about it. Suddenly the pressure to create my own meaning in the limited time I have becomes crippling to the point of paralysis. Every moment not spent living my best life is a moment wasted. I move steadily towards the grave, the years ahead steadily becoming fewer than those behind. What have I achieved with these dwindling hours, these precious days in which I am burdened to create my own meaning? I’ll tell you what I’ve done; play RuneScape and be depressed.

The problem with transferring this thinking from Sisyphus to a human living under late stage capitalism in the 21st century, is that Sisyphys didn’t have to go to a fucking job everyday. All he had to do was push a boulder! All day! Piece of piss mate. 

What I wouldn’t give to just push a boulder all day. No laundry, no dishes, no reletenlessly targeted advertising and no more fucking work emails or meetings. I bet Sisyphys never once had a melon-related panic attack in the fruit aisle of Aldi. On top of that, pushing a massive boulder to the top of a mountain is an incredible workout. Right now I have to drive nearly 30 minutes to go and sweat in a leisure centre while strangers grunt in my periphery. Give me the boulder any day. I want that head empty, no thoughts, brain scampled egg life baby. Release me from the curse of my own self-awareness. 

Okay, I get it that Albert Camu grew up in poverty, survived tuberculosis, and lived through the Second World War. I readily admit that my “melon crisis” doesn’t stack up in comparison.  All I’m saying is, it’s pretty easy to imagine someone happy when they are free from the mountains of bullshit that besiege us every single day. I am completely overwhelmed by the mere act of existing under capitalism. The sheer number of decisions I have to make every single day just to get from one end to the next breaks my autistic brain. I can’t handle it, didn’t ask for it, and I certainly don’t want it. But surely we could do literally anything else? 

I know it’s sort of laughable to say, “Let’s all go back to a simple, agrarian existence where we live off the land and chill by a waterfall smoking phat blunts.” Like, obviously that sounds a thousand times better than what we’re doing now, but short of a catastrophic societal collapse and then thousands of years of recovery, that’s not going to happen. Did you know it (sort of) takes six months and over $1,500 dollars to make a single chicken sandwich from scratch? Sustaining a single human life requires an incredible amount of work. 

There are so many of us, and we’re so connected and interdependent on each other as a species. No organism on the planet comes close to what we have built for ourselves and it is an amazing feat by every conceivable metric. But what is it all for? Have we ever once as a civilisation stopped and asked ourselves why we’re doing any of this? 

For whatever reason, we are apparently limited in our conception of all that remains possible. A civilisation disjointed and misaligned, adrift on this rock hurtling through space at mind boggling speeds, confronted with the meaninglessness of it all and refusing to collectively acknowledge it for even a moment. 

It’s like we’re still locked in that primordial stage of evolution, where we must accrue resources to survive the harsh winter and outlive our rivals. When we predominantly existed as smaller bands or tribes, that made a lot of sense. But now we are a single connected superorganism, our sense of competition is squarely in opposition to our sense of collaboration. 

We broadly recognise the need to collaborate in tackling existential threats like climate change, yet our primal competitiveness sees us knee jerking our way back towards fascism. It’s like we’ve gone to the doctor about a backache and they prescribed a dozen hungry tigers to be administered immediately. We’re still acting as though there is not enough to go around, when there is in fact plenty; it has just been misallocated. I am left always wondering why? What do we have to gain from eating ourselves alive?

I cannot help but think it comes from a petulant refusal to collectively acknowledge the void. We struggle desperately for meaning, to leave a legacy, but forget that it is impossible. Even those who live on in infamy after their death will one day perish from the collective consciousness. Our sun will die, all heat will fade from the universe until it is nothing but a barren, lifeless waste. No tower you build or lineage you foster will outlast that. Yet we sit watching helplessly as oligarchs and plutocrats rail against their own mortality to catastrophic and destructive consequences for the rest of us. I suppose in the long run, that doesn’t really matter though does it? 

We have made a home for ourselves in the belly of a vast, insatiable beast. A beast so hungry for our blood and labour that it stifles anything that cannot be effectively comodified. How are we to find happiness and peace under such conditions? It is simply not a priority. 

To quote folk punk band AJJ: 

This is no exaggeration, we're living in a death machine

And no, it's not just your imagination

You've been living in a death machine

Some of us are passengers, and some of us are driving

Almost everybody's getting bled to death to keep the motor running

Sisyhus at least is free from its roiling guts, and in that freedom it is not difficult to imagine him happy. For the rest of us, it takes a little more effort and a lot more work. 

[lilacsbeeswax]

happy birthday to your account!! for your writing event, can I please have Lilies 🌺 with work song by hozier and sirius black? thank you🖤

Work Song

Part of my 2 year milestone event!

MASTERLIST

——-

Boys, workin' on empty

Is that the kinda way to face the burning heat?

I just think about my baby

I'm so full of love I could barely eat

Work, work, and work Sirius swore these days it’s all that he did. Back when his dream of running his own tattoo shop was nothing but that he had had no idea what it would entail.

For the past week, he had been clogged with appointments. So many people had wanted custom tattoos, so he was drawing constantly. Then, it came to actually doing the pre booked tattoos which could take hours. As well as, walk ins that paid well, but took just as much time. Even when sharing the work load with James it was hard. Remus was out on vacation meaning Sirius had to take over bookkeeping and running the business. He swore he’d never have to do math, but there he was doing basic algebra at 8 am.

In short, Sirius was absolutely swamped. He had even been sleeping (albeit only a few hours) at the shop. His overfull mind only becoming more painful in the hours away from her.

Her. His only paradise. His pretty baby. The only girl for him.

He got small tastes of Y/n throughout the day, but it didn’t satiate his desire for her. Everyday at 11:30 am, she would bring him lunch during her break at her own job. She could be doing anything else, but she wanted to spend her rest time on him. Sirius loved it so much he felt sick. Often, he would be thinking about her so much that he wouldn’t be able to eat. He was unable to stomach the sweetness that he felt he never deserved.

There's nothing sweeter than my baby

I'd never want once from the cherry tree

'Cause my baby's sweet as can be

She give me toothaches just from kissin' me

Sirius walked into the apartment on Saturday night exhausted. Y/n called out to him, “Siri? Is that you?”

He didn’t respond quietly slipping off his shoes and coat. She turned the corner, running up to him and nearly sliding on the laminate floor. She wrapped her arms around him, placing her forehead on his.

“Hey baby,” Sirius sighed. “I missed you.”

She leaned away and smiled at him. That sweet smile that made him feel like he was going to faint. “I missed you more!”

Sirius moved to brush a thumb against her lips relishing in everything about her, before his gently pulled her into a kiss. It was soft and sweet and if he didn’t know better, Sirius would suspect he was going into cardiac arrest.

Boys, when my baby found me

I was three days on a drunken sin

I woke with her walls around me

Nothin' in her room but an empty crib

And I was burnin' up a fever

I didn't care much how long I lived

But I swear I thought I dreamed her

She never asked me once about the wrong I did

Y/n and Sirius had met many years ago, back when he was a self-described man whore and carried way too much trauma to hold on his own.

He had been a mess. Drinking constantly, using, and not being able to hold a stable job. Despite all of his problems, she had pulled him up and out of it.

Sirius had lost yet another job the day he had started that fateful drunken binge. Maybe, it was the cheap vodka or the combination of it and the weed, but he had called her.

When she arrived at his place after a very concerning phone call, you had found him on the floor half dead. From then on she never stopped taking care of him. She never asked what really happened.

My babe would never fret none

About what my hands and my body done

If the Lord don't forgive me

I'd still have my baby and my babe would have me

When I was kissing on my baby

And she put her love down soft and sweet

In the low lamplight I was free

Heaven and hell were words to me

Y/n and Sirius got ready for bed and laid down on their soft shared mattress for the first time in what felt like weeks.

She ran her fingers over his scarred up arms and chest. She kissed his lips, while caressing the marred skin. Sirius pulled away and kissed down her neck, nipping at all of the places he knew she liked. Out of the corner of his eye he could see her smiling under the dim lamp light.

“Fucking hell, you’re heaven.” He chuckled, saying a word between every soft peck of her neck.

“I could say the same about you, Siri.” She giggled, pulling him close to her, not planning on letting go anytime soon.

When my time comes around

Lay me gently in the cold, dark earth

No grave can hold my body down

I'll crawl home to her

Lying there wrapped around the love of his life, Sirius couldn’t help but smile, knowing no one and nothing could take him away from his baby.

MASTERLIST

[jamneuromain]

💦🎉✨ with Ransom Drysdale 😏

Hmmm... I'm going to assume that you're planning a surprise for Ransom when something went terribly wrong...

An Attempt at Stalling

Ransom Drysdale x You

Warning: None?

A/N: Sorry Jaqui it's taking so long :( I had some me-time away from social media. (and this is my first time?! writing for Ransom I hope I get the bf!Ransom vibe right) Thank you for your support and love to my fics <333

It's nearly impossible to pull a stunt right under Ransom's nose. You know. You've tried (and failed).

Despite the failures during the past two times when you tried to celebrate his success in running his grandfather's publishing house, you have decided, yet again, to surprise him by asking a group of friends to decorate your shared home with photographs - photographs that recorded the history of Ransom taking ownership of the publishing house, how he was doing his best to strike deals and follow the steps of his grandfather.

Hundreds of photos.

You planned to have them printed, hanging from the ceiling with detachable fishing lines, from the living room to the kitchen, where he'd receive a cake that said "Congrats Mr. CEO!"

And unfortunately, it takes time to pull this stunt off, and your only hope would be stalling him during his family dinner at the mansion, for your friends to finish up the decoration at your house and sneak away before your return.

When Joni drones on about her environmentally friendly cosmetics, Ransom texts you with a bored face, tapping his foot on the floor.

Ran: Honey let's bounce

You check on the group chat, in which you talked to your friends five minutes ago.

TEAM SURPRISE PARTY: Need 30 mins Ryan forgot about the bouquet!!!!!

Which means you need to stall for at least another half an hour for them to clear out. You decide to come up with an excuse to Ransom.

You: just a few more minutes I want to hear Joni s story

Ran:?

Ran: Am I out of my mind or have you been brainwashed by aliens?

You chew on your lower lip to calm your nerves. It didn't help, and you are out of options to lie about.

Ransom takes your wrist and drags you to his room, leaving a grumbling "She needs to go to the bathroom", before kicking his door shut.

"What?" He snaps slightly when you eye him curiously. His hand still clutching your wrist, making it impossible for you to wiggle free.

"I..." You are not good at lying. You get nervous every time you try to cook up with a lie. Your palms get sweaty, your face burning hot, and you fidget like standing on a cushion of needles.

"Are you trying to keep a secret from me, honey?" Ransom allows a small grin to creep up his lips. He knows the symptoms too well: the jumpy look on your face, the hair on the back of your neck, and you are gripping your sweater with your fingers - the typical standard combo tells of you trying to lie.

"No... No." Your voice comes out high-pitched, which you quickly lower your voice to pretend to be confident, "No, not at all."

He takes that as a "yes", and asks, "And it has something to do with the fact that you suddenly don't want to go home?"

"No." You clear your throat, "Absolutely not."

Ransom nods thoughtfully, ignoring all the previous "no"s you've said, "You're not hiding a dog in our house, are you?"

"What? No." Although you are tempted to. You are hiding a cake and a bunch of your friends, and that hardly qualifies as "dog". Answering with more confidence, "Stop being paranoid. I want to spend some time with your grandpa. He seems ... lonely."

"Harlan?" Ransom snorts, "Honey, I appreciate you not adopting a dog in our house, but I don't want to spend a second more in this stinking place. Can we please go home?"

You sigh in defeat. There's no way on Earth that you can stall any longer without causing more suspicion. You pray that your friends are out of your house by now, as Ransom takes your hand to leave the room, waves goodbye to Harlan, and pulls his car out of the driveway.

You text frantically (and as subtly as you can sitting next to Ransom, who is driving the car) on your way back home.

You: SOS RAN'S DRIVING BACK HOME W/ ME

You: I hope ur done with the decor and the cake

You: AND THE FLOWERS!!

You could only text as fast as you can, hitting send before you could check the spellings and shutting the screen down before Ransom could peek in your direction.

You are a truly terrible spy if you ever come to it.

The drive home takes roughly fifteen minutes, which you let out an exhale of relief on arriving at your house and notice the empty front yard. Your friends drove here, it must have meant that they drove away a few minutes earlier.

Go Team. You chuckle silently.

Shoving away your phone in your pocket, you hold Ransom's extended hand as he shuts the car door and locks it. Every step you have taken nearer your house makes your heart jump out, fearing that Ransom would hate this surprise.

Ransom is the type of person who prefers seeing everything as if he's a clairvoyant. He doesn't hate surprises, he only hates it when the surprise has nothing to do with him - for example, celebrating someone else's birthday.

He mentioned once or twice about Linda forgetting about his birthdays when he was a kid, which you could only assume is the origin of the dislike of surprises.

Deep down, you secretly hope that he would enjoy this one.

Ransom spares a glimpse at his phone before turning the lights on.

The chandelier sparkles to life, and hanging from the ceiling, dozens of photos that recorded the history - his proud history of supporting the company, expanding it into not only publishing Harlan's books, but also owning a few newspapers and investing in some apps.

You wipe the invisible sweat from your forehead, relieved that this is a beautiful scene that you could almost cry.

"So this is what you've been hiding, huh?" Ransom comments lazily, giving your ass a light swat, which earns a squeal from your lips, "You know I hate surprises..." He mutters, pinching one of the photos closest to him, and taking a good look.

It was a photo taken from the earlier days, when he had just landed himself the company. A photo of you taking a selfie with him, as he struggles with the tie on his neck in a black suit.

"But I love this one." His soft gaze falls in your direction, pulling you close like a magnet, "Thank you, Honey."

You smile in his embrace. The said smile grows wider when he kisses the top of your head.

"Though I must say, you did a terrible job keeping secrets."

"Oh BULL," You scrawl, looking up at him in defiance, "admit it, Ran, you had no idea that I was gonna surprise you with this beautiful decoration."

Smirking in triumph, you challenge him for his reply.

"Too bad, honey," Ransom pulls out his phone, reciprocating your smirk, before opening the messaging app, and scrolling down to reveal your messages, "Aww, you are a terrible spy."

You: SOS RAN'S DRIVING BACK HOME W/ ME

You: I hope ur done with the decor and the cake

You: AND THE FLOWERS!!

They were meant for your friends, but you must have been so tense that you didn't even notice the receiver when you hit send.

As you huff out in defeat, Ransom sneaks a kiss from your lips, grinning wildly, "Now where's the cake I was promised?"

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[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for saying that my boyfriend would deserve it if he died in the Titan submersible implosion?

I figure it's far enough out from the argument itself now that I can post this. I (27M) and my boyfriend (29M) come from very different backgrounds.

He grew up in a wealthy family. His family isn't, like, billionaire rich--his father is a semi-prestigious actor--but they can, for example, eat at michelin star restaurants on a regular basis, pay for all their kid's ivy league educations, drop thousands of dollars on an impromptu trip to Europe for no reason, and so on and so forth. Which, like, good for them! Genuinely, I'm glad my partner and his family did not struggle with money growing up.

I, on the other hand, grew up in poverty. I didn't have any formal schooling until I got my GED and enrolled in college. I grew up food insecure, living in a very poor area, and frequently had periods of time where my family could not afford to pay our bills. I was extremely lucky to be able to go to college, and I only managed to pay for it due to spending basically all of my free time either working or applying for every niche scholarship I could find. Even now, several years into my career, I pretty much live off of rice and lentils so I can pay rent.

All this to say: Neither of us would consider ourselves pro-corporation or billionaire, but my boyfriend is sometimes more sympathetic to wealthier individuals due to his background. We do not currently live together, which is not because of the aforementioned, but is relevant.

A while back, my boyfriend's grandfather came to stay with his parents. His grandfather was, at the time, not feeling well--coughing, sneezing, the works. He pretty obviously had COVID. Nevertheless, my boyfriend took the 4 hour drive to spend time with him, and wouldn't you know it, he got sick. He stayed at his parents house until he got better. I decided not to make the drive to see my boyfriend, and stayed at my apartment. This is because I am immunocompromised and would prefer not to. Y'know. Die.

While my boyfriend was out, the whole debacle with the Titan submersible occurred, which I kept an eye on and made some memes about. A couple days after they found the wreckage, my boyfriend became coherent enough to have a phone conversation. While talking to him, I told him the story of what happened, the details about the submarine, the $250k ticket price, and so on.

He seemed indifferent until I brought up the 19 year old on board. He then seemed very upset, especially when he found out the kid didn't want to go in the first place. I tried to assure him that most of the memes were not about the kid, but he was having none of it. He seemed very sad, and said something along the lines of "I hope I don't go out like that."

I was confused. I didn't think his parents were so rich they would be able to afford that, but I figured it was just a hypothetical. My boyfriend has a big fear of death, and I often need to reassure him about things like this. "Well," I replied, "If you're worried about that, I can assure you that's an easy death to avoid. Just don't do dumb shit like that."

He then got VERY upset. "What do you mean??? Are you saying I'd deserve to die like that???"

Me: "I mean, that's not what I was saying? But you're not 19, you're almost 30, and you're not financially dependent on your parents. Also, your parents aren't nearly that rich, and even if they were, I know them, and they are not nearly that stupid. So, at that point, to get into that situation, you would need to personally drop $250k on a ticket, then weld yourself inside of an experimental deep sea submarine controlled via text message and an xbox controller. Like, there are several steps you personally could have Not taken to avoid being in this situation, including simply not deciding to be on an underwater death trap. So, yeah, that'd be on your head."

He then got even MORE upset, and started yelling about how insensitive I was being. After some back and forth, I got it out of him that he had been speaking metaphorically--that, from his perspective, I was saying that I thought he deserved to die of COVID, because he had made the choice to spend time with his grandfather despite knowing he had COVID.

I assured him that no, that was not what I was saying in the slightest, and he calmed down, but I was still upset. He had been yelling at me, after all, and it legitimately didn't occur to me that he was speaking metaphorically, while I was still on the very literal experimental submarine.

I asked one of my friends/his other partner (30M) about it after it happened, and he laughed and said that my boyfriend was being ridiculous. It's been several months at this point, it was a silly argument, I'm not going to bring it up again (because that would be weird) and I'm sure he's forgotten all about it. That said, if I'm being honest, I still feel kind of indignant that he immediately assumed I was secretly hoping he was going to die in a submarine. Am I being insane here?

What are these acronyms?

[curio-queries]

FACE, LETTER, & CLOSER THAN THIS

Disclaimer: The following post is full of my own opinions and interpretations. I do not share this with the intent to convince anyone else that this meaning upholds for all. My interpretations are also limited to English and that is an important distinction to make when accessing art from another language and culture. There are absolutely intentions and meanings that won't translate. Art is beautifully subjective, and I hope you all find your own reasons to love Jimin's music.

This is quite a lengthy post. Thank you to anyone who reads. I'd love to hear your thoughts as well, so don't feel shy to share! 💜

So FACE has been out for nearly a year, why am I making this post now? Honestly, it's all because of Closer Than This and the few nuggets we can glean from the music video. The very first clip of the mv is of Jimin's team discussing the lyrics and then Jimin's recording session. Honestly, I was quite surprised CTT was written at the same time as all of the FACE songs.

So the question then rises: Why wasn't CTT included in FACE? The answer I've arrived at is because CTT is not part of the journey Jimin was describing with FACE. More on CTT below but first, we need to revisit FACE:

TIMELINE

(US dates - I have to do too much timezone manipulation in my job, I'm not spending the time here):

30 DEC 2018 : Promise Release on SoundCloud

21 FEB 2023 : FACE announcement

16 MAR 2023 : Set Me Free pt.2 Release

23 MAR 2023 : FACE Release

22 DEC 2023 : Closer Than This Release

And here's the FACE schedule:

MOTTO-THEME-GUIDE

These phrases are ALL OVER the FACE project! They're in the digital media that was released, on pretty much every side of the physical albums, on the back of the photocards and postcards... They're pretty much on everything official connected to FACE. They're not just fluff included to fill up space; these words have MEANING in this project. I've been using these phrases as guide posts to help me interpret some of the meanings behind FACE recently, and I would encourage anyone interested in Jimin's deeper message to do the same. I've highlighted my references below.

Circles of Resonance Reflection of vulnerable minds and unexposed wounds. An echo, tremor and small movement to reach you. Face of facing the deepest part of inner-self. Face, the reflection of myself in an unfamiliar appearance. Waves originated from the deepest invisible inner world, pass through the face on the surface and reach others to resonate while transmitting the inner voice. Waves spread beautifully, finding its own flow despite wounds and distortions from a smallest scratch. The face of unwavering effort despite repeated falls and pain.

When asked what the album was about, Jimin freely shares that it relates to the events during the pandemic...and then the conversation usually moves on without any deeper discussion. This interview is probably the most verbose Jimin was any time he described the meaning behind FACE. If you haven't watched it recently, I highly recommend it.

We know that Jimin rarely shares the problems he's having whilst he's going through them (with us at least). He always waits until after he's moved on so that he can tell us not to worry, that it's in the past. (This concept comes up again in this post so keep it in mind.)

The distinction that I think is important to make is that, yes, FACE is about the pandemic, but it's not a straightforward diary of events. It's about how those events affected him. How the waves caused by the pandemic RESONATE, ECHO, and TREMOR through him - effecting the UNEXPOSED WOUNDS. Jimin found something in himself through this experience and had no choice but to FACE it. There were no distractions anymore, no pushing it to the side to deal with later. And he was able to share that journey with us in such a tragically beautiful way.

THE TRACKS

I made the below gifs for each track but I think they look best as a set without the tags so you can get the full effect of the differing ripples. Check out this post to see what I mean. ☺️

FACE-OFF

I know everyone likes to meme about Face-Off and trying to find who hurt Jimin to make them pay...but I really don't associate Face-Off with an external person. You can betray yourself in much worse ways than anyone else can because you know exactly all of your own weaknesses. You know exactly what pretty lies to tell yourself. And honestly, the source of the event doesn't really matter in the context of FACE. I view Face-Off as the initial incident. The SMALLEST SCRATCH that pushes the waves to spread.

There's also a lovely bit of foreshadowing with the lyric "Like crazy, everyone shout out, yeah yeah". CIRCLES OF RESONANCE. Not singular, multiple; we are in for a bumpy ride.

INTERLUDE : DIVE

I admit, I only listen to this track when I'm doing a full album listen. I love instrumental tracks but this isn't instrumental to me, it's sound effects. And I just personally have a sensory issue that comes out to play here BUT it's important to include in our discussion so don't skip it when you're trying to delve into the meanings!

The message I glean here is just how pervasive the issue is becoming. Jimin can be going about his life, trying to disregard it but the UNEXPOSED WOUNDS are there lurking underneath it all.

The pretty music overlaying the track may sound like glitz and glam, but this is just the beginning of the WAVES SPREADING BEAUTIFULLY, FINDING ITS OWN FLOW DESPITE WOUNDS AND DISTORTIONS...

LIKE CRAZY

I've been promising a post on Like Crazy for ages and this may be the closest I get to it. Let me know if any of you are interested in a more in-depth discussion on how the movie and the song work together. My short summary for both is this: there are moments when you willfully take actions that you KNOW are against your best interest. Not in a fleeting eats-too-many-cookies way. In a I-know-putting-my-hand-on-the-stove-and-turning-it-on-will-burn-me way.

I hope none of you experience this to such a damning extent. I have. Despite being the kind of person who I thought would never venture down such a path. It's not something I wish upon anyone. This is the WAVES ORIGINATED FROM THE DEEPEST INVISIBLE INNER WORLD, PASS THROUGH THE FACE ON THE SURFACE...

ALONE

Have you ever repeated a word enough that it starts to sound bizzare? What if you got the point where you thought the weird sound was reality? And then you were confronted with the truth. This song is that point. Where you are left with the sober understanding of yourself. FACE, THE REFLECTION OF MYSELF IN AN UNFAMILIAR APPEARANCE.

SET ME FREE pt.2

The rise! Jimin was able to find a way to push himself beyond the betrayal of himself. It absolutely wasn't easy and there were setbacks, but this is a clear call to any who find themselves in similar circumstances: you CAN overcome. THE FACE OF UNWAVERING EFFORT DESPITE REPEATED FALLS AND PAIN.

Remember when I said earlier that Jimin only tells us about his struggle once it's over? I honestly believe that's why SMF was the pre-release track. He needed us to know that there was a happy ending before he would tell us about the pain he went through.

LIKE CRAZY (English Version)

As I mentioned my sensory issue above, I cannot talk about Like Crazy without mentioning the whispered English at the beginning/end. I HATE it sooooo much! It just twigs my brain in all the wrong ways. It's a huge part of why it took me a long time to appreciate LC. As much as I hate it though, it's absolutely necessary for the interpretation of LC. It firmly gives us a landmark into where and how the song relates to the movie. It also creates a bookend structure that gives the original and the English versions their own rightful places to exist.

LETTER

My very first post on this blog was a simple comparison of the lyrics in Like Crazy from the translation on the original music video to the english version. There is absolutely a difference here and I think it's a very important distinction that there are two versions of Like Crazy in the album. One is AN ECHO, TREMOR AND SMALL MOVEMENT TO REACH YOU. This phrase is for us, the audience. None of the other phrases use "you". Even though Jimin has set himself free, there are still CIRCLES RESONATING.

If you have seen any of my posts prior to this, you likely know how obsessed with Letter I am. I have the hardest time naming anything as a favorite (even favorite colour, there's just sooo many good uses of different colors) so I hope you understand how revolutionary it is for me to unequivocally state that Letter is my favorite song. Like ever. For all of my (cough*decades*cough) of music-listening, opinion-having life. Letter is THE ONE. Letter is it. I probably have stronger feelings about Letter than any relationship I've been in (but I'm aspec so take that with a grain of salt...)

I listen to Letter A LOT (sometimes on literal repeat - there's a video on YouTube that loops it for over an hour and I've definitely contributed several of those listens) and while working on this post, I would still get emotional hearing it at the end of FACE. This song is the absolute definition of the beauty that can only truly be understood after utter tragedy.

To me, Letter is about how this experience has effected Jimin to the point where there's a noticeable difference in the way he interacts with and appreciates those he loves, in all interpretations of the word love. WAVES...REACH OTHERS TO RESONATE WHILE TRANSMITTING THE INNER VOICE.

I am not using this post to debate the merits of exactly who Letter is for: a significant other, ARMY, or Jimin himself. Frankly, I don't think it matters to the meaning of the song. Use whatever flavour most appeals to you. That's the real genius and gift of Jimin's music imo. He creates it in such a way that we can fold it around our own personal stories and needs.

WHAT WAS THIS POST ABOUT AGAIN?

Right, so rewind to the release of Closer Than This. I'd had very little sleep as I traveled for the holidays and was absolutely feeling the timezone difference. But I stayed up to hear Jimin's new song. I listened to it first in Spotify and thought it sounded like a beautiful, happy, well-produced gift of a song - perfect for the end of the year and to comfort us with his departure for military service. Then I watched the mv to read the subtitles... Y'all, I absolutely was NOT expecting to see clips from the time covered in Jimin's Production Diary! I wouldn't have been surprised if it was the same team that Jimin worked with before but at a later time - he trusts them artisically after all. BUT these clips were the same angles and same conversations we saw from the development of FACE.

So I started my due diligence. Is it possible CTT was supposed to be part of FACE but they held it specifically to release when it did? I listened to FACE multiple times trying to insert CTT into the narrative. And it just doesn't fit this journey...at all. Like not in the slightest. I thought maybe immediately after Letter or even replacing Letter but no. I even tried inserting Promise as a bridge and it just doesn't work in the context of FACE.

CTT has a pretty literal storytelling narrative. It describes the journey WE have been on with Jimin. It lists his promises to US going forward. The music video being an album of memories, supports the nostalgic and loving viewpoint of the song. It has absolutely nothing to do with how Jimin was affected by the events of the pandemic or anything he found inside himself because of it.

Both songs have been described by Jimin as a 'fan song' and as I described in this post, there are many reasons that support both of them falling into this categorization. To me, Letter is more about Jimin having a deep intimate conversation with us because he trusts us. While CTT is literally about the relationship between ARMY and Jimin.

Anyway, I think that's all I've got to say about it for now. What are your thoughts? Should Closer Than This have been included in FACE? Was it just a marketing ploy to keep generating our interest after Jimin left?

(BTW I'm really happy with those FACE gifs and how the ripples look when they're together. They took some time to figure out. I just wish I had some better software to turn them into gifs so the colours display better, but alas, beggars can't be choosers. They look really great in the ppt that I made them in but I guess that's just for me to enjoy!)

[tanoraqui]

Notes for the 5th and final season of Crownless, the Young Aragorn show that has lived rent-free in my brain since a slightly insane message to a friend at 1am sometime in 2019:

[s1&2, s3, s4]

A few quick notes before we get juicy:

- Gandalf still appears once per season this whole time

- hopefully Stephen Colbert has been doing the same thing, as a random assortment of unrelated very minor characters

- the man who's herb-loremaster of the Houses of Healing in RotK, who explains the linguistic history of athelas rather than producing any of the plant, is a junior apprentice with the healers. We met a young Ioreth in Lossarnach in a MotW episode in s4 I think

- reminder that the theme song is a setting of the "All that is gold does not glitter" poem and that young Aragorn is SO hot. We WILL cast someone who could slam open the doors of Helm's Deep and swagger in like sex on legs.

- I am definitely playing fast and loose with canon timeline and geopolitical events this season

Okay, real stuff now:

Until now I’ve mostly just described character arcs and plot points but now it’s time for MAJOR THEMES. As manifested by character foils.

[maniacal delighted laughter]

Note: this season, Aragorn is like 40% protagonist and Arwen and Denethor are both 30%, and Dúnawen, Halbarad and Roddis are solidly secondary cast - but, to an extent, more notable than in s3-4, because we're spending less time on monster of the week with all its minor 1- or 2-ep characters.

Yes, we've completed the slow transition from pure MotW to nearly pure season-long plot. There's still an element of new problem and/or location each week, but the driving issue all season is the increasingly unavoidable war with Umbar. There is at least one episode where Aragorn is back in the northern woods with Halbarad and Dúnawen and they save a random hamlet from trolls or something...but it's not as simple as it used to be...but maybe it still feels more right than all the work Aragorn has been doing in the south...

[we'll get to that]

So, ideally, this show is a 5-season musing essay on leadership…and Denethor is a good leader. He is a good Steward of Gondor. I WILL die on this hill. He is too proud to bow his head to any other and he looks first to Gondor's advantage and only sometimes beyond that, but these are not terrible failings in the Steward of Gondor. By the time we meet him in LotR, he has led his country in an increasingly hopeless war for four decades, and they love or at least respect the hell out of them -

No, actually, let's talk about amdir vs estel.

Both are forms of hope. Amdir, as defined in the Athrabeth Finrod a Andreth (courtesy of Tolkien Gateway) is "an expectation of good, which though uncertain has some foundation in what is known." Denethor, I posit - I write in this show - has a good capacity for amdir. He believes in the strength of Gondor and its people...but Sauron overthrows his hope of victory by showing him the seemingly overwhelming forces set against him. Denethor isn't pessimistic by nature, but even when he's optimistic, he's realistic. He cannot bring himself to believe in goodness beyond what there is at least a glimmer of evidence for.

Estel is an unfortunately symptom of Tolkien's Catholocism more synonymous with "faith" than "hope." Finrod describes estel as, "not defeated by the ways of the world, for it does not come from experience, but from our nature and first being. If we are indeed the Eruchin, the Children of the One, then He will not suffer Himself to be deprived of His own, not by any Enemy, not even by ourselves." Or, if we strip out some of the religiosity for network television and my own preference: estel is hope beyond reason or any real evidence, save perhaps gut instinct. Estel is sending 2 halflings alone to take the Ring to Mordor and hurl it into Mount Doom, and in the end using yourself as bait to give them more time. Estel is the belief that joy always lies on the far side of sorrow, no matter how long the journey through the dark.

Aragorn, of course, is literally named Estel.

And estel is the empirically correct choice in Middle Earth, because that's how the world and story (same difference) is built. The characters do not and should not know that, but it is - we the audience knows that the answer to the question "who should rule Gondor, Denethor or Aragorn" is 100% "Aragorn." But the characters don't! And therein lies the conflict.

(Ecthelion is still here, being the actual Steward of Gondor. But Finduilas's death and the loss of his friend Thengel, and the mounting stress of the rising power of Mordor and how it's riling up all their southern and eastern neighbors, compound with his genuine age...he is still mighty in heart and mind, but his time is passing and everyone knows it.)

The question of the first 4 seasons, for audience and characters alike, was, "can Aragorn be King of Gondor?" Is he wise enough, is he charismatic enough, is skilled at diplomacy and at war, does he know how to care and command without being overbearing, he capable in a practical way at bureaucracy, tolerating fools and the hundred little tasks which a king must do daily...

By the end of s4, we all know that the answer is "yes." He still lacks experience, but he always will until he starts the job - Aragorn did some clever stately thing at the end of s4, and when Thengel fell he took able command of the battlefield before handing it gracefully to Theoden, and if Ecthelion died tomorrow Aragorn could successfully claim is crown and lead Gondor in the war they all know is coming...

The question now is: should Aragorn be King of Gondor? This is really multiple questions: Does Gondor need a central ruler at all? (What about democracy?) If so, does Gondor need a King, when they have a Steward? Does Gondor need a King right now? What about Arnor?

The answers, which will be clear by the end of the season, are in order:

1. Yes Gondor needs a central ruler; this isn't even really a question the show poses. We are NOT dropping modern political theory into my medievalesque fantasy show, thank you very much. We will continue to explore hte internal Gondorin politics set up in s4, though - the Steward's power isn't absolute; there are fiefs to the south and there are always other lords, merchants, scholars, craftsmen, farmers and laborers with their own power...

2. Gondor doesn't necessarily need a King...but it does need Aragorn more than it needs Denethor, see: amdir vs. estel. It will especially need Aragorn more, Aragorn's personal and political philosophy more, when at last the war is won and there is rebuilding to do for nor just Gondor but all Middle Earth...

3. But the sort of unlikely alliances at which Aragorn excels (because he is capable of thinking of other nations before Gondor) will not save then now, or, will not save them when Sauron truly begins to attack, except with Rohan. Rhun might be convinced to neutrality, but there is too much bad blood with Harad, with Khand, with Umbar... Aragorn can be king of this realm, he should be king of this realm, but there is nothing he can do for it for now that Denethor cannot...

4. And there is still trouble in Arnor, where there is no glory to be had for dealing it [see: aforementioned 'back in the woods' episode]. S5 is based out of Minas Tirith, but there is more travel - the designated "land of the season" is really the Kingdom of Gondor and Arnor as they will be in the Fourth Age. it opens with a 2-parter diplomatic mission to (Rhun?) to avert whatever war would otherwise have started from the attack on Rohan at the end of s4. Aragorn spends a lot of time in the southern fiefs (Lossarnach, Lebannin, Dol Amroth, etc), especially as the threat of the Corsairs of Umbar becomes paramount. And he returns to Arnor, as he has only a couple times since s1...

Though mostly it's Arwen who spends time in Arnor this season. Arwen's questions are different than Aragorn's. She's been competent this whole time - she has studied wise, strong, gentle rule with some of the greatest stewards Elvenkind ever knew. She did have to figure out how to adjust to Men, but she's done that, and moreover, she knows she wants to do that. She loves Aragorn, she loves Minas Tirith and Gondor, its hills and shores and people; she could make a life here, even if a short one, and something in her trills at the mystery of what would come next...

It also scares her. That she wants it, the ferocity with which she wants it, scares her. And the cost is so high...

The show's 100th episode would happen this season, and I would beg, I would blow half my budget, I would ritually sacrifice an unpaid intern...I would hopefully have proven myself enough with s1-4 that I could convince the Tolkien estate to sell me the rights to the extended Tale of Beren and Lúthien, or the Lay of Leithen or whatever complete form they're willing to share, for just one episode...so the 100th episode would some sort of flashback/dream sequence/illusion cast by a skilled elvish minstrel of the complete tale of Beren and Lúthien with Aragorn cast as Beren and Arwen as Lúthien, and etc. characters in corresponding roles.

(I'd do it with just what we have in LotR+Appendices, but I want the full rights so bad. For just 1 episode!)

With literally 22 episodes per season, this would be ep 12, in which case it is the final straw that prompts Arwen to flee Gondor and the fate she feels drawing in on her. If it's earlier, same. If later, she might've gone already, and this flashback/imagining comes as Galadriel tells her the story as she literally saw some of it.

There's also some sort of plot for Arwen to get involved with, maybe Dol Guldur again, or the barrows...Arwen with the Dúnedain, because she will be their queen, too - much easier than Gondor, for she has long been their cousin! but still a new thing. We ABSOLUTELY get 1 episode of pure Arwen, Elrohir and Elladan being a badass team.

She also discusses her Choice with them, and goes home to Rivendell and discusses it with Elrond. I forget what fic I read suggested that Arwen consciously makes the Choice not of Lúthien but of Elros, but it's SUCH a good point/interpretation and it 100% comes up in some conversation.

(I dunno if each episode is showing events in the south and north or if they wholesale switch back and forth or what.)

Throughout this, Arwen and Aragorn also start to develop the long-range dream-sharing they sometimes do in the LotR movies. They haven't done any of the traditional things elves do to bond telepathically (sex, cooperative meditation, etc), but they've grown close and the Great Song pulls them closer.

BACK TO THE SOUTH...

There’s an early-season episode in which Aragorn and Denethor both go back to Rohan to help young King Theoden with [stuff], and they both start to get competitive over it. Theoden ends up telling them both, “Full offense but I’m the King of Rohan actually, so thank you for your help and get the fuck out of my court.” Aragorn is duly chastised, and reminds himself to keep his pride in check. Denethor is chastised…for a while, and his pride will not forget this, we it has never forgotten any slight.

S5 is kind of a tragedy, and the tragedy is that Aragorn and Denethor could achieve so much if only they could get along. Or rather, if only they didn't naturally occupy the same ecological niche, that niche being ruler of Gondor.

Could Denethor ever serve Aragorn as Steward to King? No, because Denethor's pride is too great - he will never bend the knee to one he considers unworthy, and he will never consider anyone worthy above himself. Could Aragorn stay anonymously in Gondor forever, serve as Captain to Denethor's Steward? (This is Ecthelion's plan.) For Aragorn's pride...yes, Aragorn is capable of that with someone he deems greater than himself...but Denethor just does not qualify. Equal, perhaps, but not greater, and inevitable Aragorn would feel the need to step up and do what he thought right, and then there would be trouble...

Could they be true equal partners? No, because this, too, would try Denethor's pride, and Aragorn's more humble but also more righteous pride - and then Gondor would be lost, because if you took a poll in late s5 for who should succeed Ecthelion as Steward, Denethor or Thorongil...Denethor would win, but it'd be pretty close. Civil unrest–close.

(It needs to be clear why Aragorn could walk into this city 50 years later with no warning and be hailed and accepted as king)

(Denethor knows he has his father's support. He also knows he doesn't have many of his people's. This stings bad.)

(Aragorn is hurting his popularity a little by a couple times this season disappearing back north for Things up there)

(Also, to be clear, Denethor and Aragorn are both predominantly focussed on the growing problem of Mordor and its allies, and too wise to sabotage each other/themselves in that with rivalry...much.)

Btw the existence of the Minas Tirith Palantir was introduced in s4 (someone stole it maybe, and Aragorn had to get it back ASAP?). S5 sees Denethor start to use it...secretly. One time he's nearly found out; another time, he nearly tells someone...but he is not and does not. He promises himself he will only use it in diremost need, and he does hold to that promise (in these early years)

Then, late-season, Denethor finally figures out who Aragorn is. What Aragorn is. A comment let slip? A sketch of Isildur in the archives? A comment Finduilas made, before she died, about how Arwen plans to be a queen of somewhere someday soon? The Palantir?

Before he can do more than digest it, however, Ecthelion is assassinated! (Or, a harbor is deliberately attacked while he was visiting? They were aiming for him but it wasn't a 'knife in darkness' thing.)

Gondor is now AT WAR with Umbar and probably Near, maybe even Far Harad!

Yet on the eve of a big fight - or a month or so before, because travel times - Aragorn is needed urgently in the north! He must choose!

...He chooses to ride north. Just before he goes, Denethor confronts him about this abandonment of his duties to Gondor - and about his heritage. It ends with Denethor spitting, "Come back for your crown or don't come back at all!"

(Denethor regrets his words as soon as Aragorn is out hte door. What if he did come back for his crown? Would they tear Gondor apart between them? Denethor tells himself that for Gondor, he would hand over his scepter of office peacefully...but he knows he wouldn't. What right has Aragorn's ancient blood to the country that Denethor's family has served with blood and sweat all these generations! ...Anyway, he has more important things to worry about. The Corsairs besiege the coasts; the Haradrim advance from the south.)

Aragorn rides north as fast as can be, with (Dúnawen or Halbarad? Both work for different reasons). They meet up with Arwen and the Dúnadain to deal with the rising barrow-wrights (threatening the Shire, ultimate symbol of peaceful civilians!) Meanwhile in the south, Denethor, Halbarad and Roddis go to war--

Aragorn wraps up the fight in the north...for now. It'll be a problem again in the future...

He borrows a ship from the Havens and he and [whichever OG Ranger Trio friend] race the wind back south. (Arwen stays in the north)

Gondor has had victory in pitched battle on land, but the main problem is still the Corsairs. Was always the Corsairs, as Aragorn warned Ecthellon ago. Gondor has a navy, but not enough to win a pitched sea-battle, much less enough to guard their whole coastline.

Aragorn reaches Umbar ahead of the bulk of the army (which Denethor is with). He meets the vanguard, containing his friends (skilled scouts that they are)

Aragorn: I have an idea. Dúnawen: Is it another of your impossible plans based on ancient history. Aragorn: Maybe.

With a dozen-odd small ships as bait, they lure the bulk of the Corsair fleet into a vulnerable position... and then they burn the motherfucking pirates to the waterline.

When the Gondorin army catches up, they are met by Roddis, Dúnawen, and whoever else walked away from that naval escapade...with a message from Aragorn. [this text is pure canon!]

"To the Steward," Dúnawen said, and bowed to Denethor (though her voice was pitched to carry to all those watching). "He said, 'Other tasks now call me, lord, and much time and many perils must pass, ere I come again to Gondor, if that be my fate.’"

Denethor internally: what the FUCK does that mean. Is he coming back or not? If he comes back after this dramatic victory, the people will surely support him...

But he says something gracious and grateful, and goes home to be Steward of Gondor, watchful and warlike ever toward Mordor

Dúnawen stays in Gondor and marries Roddis. A couple weeks later, though, she hikes up the mountains behind Minas Tirith, where she spent much time in s3, and meets Halbarad, who spent much time there with her, and who left with Aragorn after the battle in Umbar. They catch up a little, clarify that she's staying, he's going north...

Dúnawen: You'll visit, I hope? Halbarad, looking out over Minas Tirith and the lands stretching out from it: No. The next time I lay eyes on these fields shall be the last.

(But he comes south anyway, in the War of the Ring! He knows he'll die there and he comes anyway, because there is Aragorn to aid and evil to fight!)

Dúnawen says, "Ah. Then Roddis and I shall have to visit you - and our crownless king, of course!"

Halbarad warns, "He meant his words, you know, and more. He will not return until the need is greatest and the time is right."

Dúnawen says, "I know. Aragorn always means his words. I did say we would visit you."

Halbarad laughs. "Indeed you did! Well, wait a few years - when we parted ways, he was paddling up toward Lothlórien, in expectation of meeting a lady there. Who knows how much time will pass in that enchanted wood, ere we see either of them again!"

The camera lifts as the music swells - Gondor's theme, Arnor's theme, the theme of the King as the camera flies through Gondor up the Anduin, passes a boat pulled over below the Falls of Rauros, passes the status of Anárion and Isildur by Amon Hen and Amon Lhaw, and catches up with a Man in a dark green cloak as he steps at last beneath the boughs of golden Lothlórien. He knows where to go, though they never discussed it, only shared a dream. The music changes to the theme of Aragorn and Arwen as he comes to where she waits on the white-flowered hill of Cerin Amroth. They take each other's hands while looking deeply into each other's eyes, pledge their troth, and embrace with a long kiss as the camera pulls out and twilight fades to dark...

And the dark turns to the flipping pages of a closing book, as the camera pulls out further to show once more a middle-aged Sam Gamgee - comfortably portly in his fireside armchair in Bag End - reading to half a dozen children.

"But aren't they going to get married?" a young hobbit-lass asks.

"Not in this story," says Sam.

Rosie comes in from where she was leaning contentedly on the doorway and says, "Not until after the king helps your Da and Mr. Frodo save the whole world. But--"

[young hobbits clamoring for that story! Nine-Fingered Frodo and the Ring of Doom! Samwise the Brave! I wanna hear about the spider!]

"But," Rose repeats more loudly and firmly, picking up 1-2 children at once, "that's a story for another night. Right now it's bedtime."

"Listen to your mother!" Sam says, puts the red-bound book on a side table and gets up to lift a slightly larger protesting child. "This Da is getting too old to be reading at all hours anyway!"

They usher the children out, to bed. The camera lingers for an extra moment the cheerful living room: where Sting hangs on the wall above the fireplace and on the adjacent wall, a small but expertly woven tapestry, with gems-encrusted threads which almost glow with their own light, of a star breaking through dark clouds to shine on a small figure holding a mirrored-shining glass in a dark land [implication: personal gift from Arwen]. There is a mayoral sash draped haphazardly over the back of one sofa, toys and a late-snack plate or two scattered about, and the thick red book from which Sam was reading, with the bookmark only about 3/4 though. The tale is never over, you see.

Fade to black for real this time, credits roll over a choral cover of the full poem: All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king...

[writingquestionsanswered]

(1) Speaking of fan fictions, how to deal with the fact that I'm never going to receive the feedback I would like to because I am writing in my native language and not in English?

I started writing fan fictions in 2011. I spend practically every hour of my free time writing narrative, researching, editing, and of course posting and sharing on AO3.

But I'm... lonely. Very few views, no kudos, no bookmarks, and of course not even a single review.

I keep working hard on my stories, I keep posting nearly every week a new chapter, but it's getting tiresome. I fear a burnout, or a collapse, and yet I know I can't help it, because I can't force people to read, even using Translate.

Fan-Fiction: Struggling to Find Non-English Readers

How can I stay motivated in a situation like this? I love writing and I always do my best, sweating and crying and loving my work, but reading other stories (in English, of course) and other fan fictions where the author goes like: "I wrote this without even re-reading, not planning, etc" and still they get more feedback than me... I die inside every time. Thank you for your eventual help. I wish you a wonderful day. :)

I'm so sorry that you're struggling to find readers of your native language. One thing you might try is looking on social media for fan groups based in your country for the fandoms you write for. Then you can post links to your stories there. You can also try posting in general/worldwide groups to see if there are any readers who speak/read your language. One last thing you might try is posting here on tumblr, then use hashtags to tag not only the fandom but the language.

I hope one of these things will work for you! ♥

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[angelfeed]

Finally acquired all Wet Moon volumes :D I came across some of them at Half Price Books one day and was so happy to see her art again, it was a huge source of inspiration for me as a teenager and remains inspirational today. I love how colorful this set is, and it fits perfectly at home on the bookshelves alongside our comics n manga.

Besides purchasing random books here and there, Hune and I have nearly stopped all unnecessary purchases and outings as a form of protest against our government's involvement in genocide. Rest assured when we do buy anything we find the cheapest deals tho- The Wet Moon set for example was only $30.

My cooking continues to improve as I make more meals at home. That Marx quote is so true where he talks about, "the less you [spend], the greater is your alienated life." I rely on food stamps so it's always important to figure out the best nutrient dense meals on a budget, and I'm still needing to invest in home gardening that accommodates a small apartment patio. Need to acquire some 5 gallon buckets which I'm thinking about starting off with potatoes, tomatoes, kale, and green onions (carrots, cucumbers & blueberries would be good too). I briefly talked with Ella @pinkmoondoll9shihtzu recently about "victory gardens" which were popular during WWI & WWII, and the concept seems more relevant today as food prices rise and this insidious global fascistic political atmosphere accelerates. It's also just good to be as self-efficient as possible while allowing oneself to save what amounts to be a pretty penny when living in poverty. Then I can use my food stamps on other yummy things.

Maintaining layouts also feels like tending to a virtual garden of sorts and I'm happy with the look of this new theme for lovehael. Every time I play with coding it reminds me that it's actually fun and I need to set up a Neocities page. Besides tending to things around the house and online, a lot of my time and energy has been going towards volunteer work with Palestinians seeking help amplifying their donation pages. It's incredibly heavy on some days, the stories and pictures and videos I am processing for months on end, but they've been enduring so much worse in large part due to my government's policies, and this is just one thing I can do to acknowledge that and help alleviate their suffering to some degree. I find myself connecting to many Palestinian families primarily through Instagram, and getting news thru accounts there as well as Twitter & Tumblr. Twitter actually feels better to use now that I'm focusing on more political accounts and leaving the pretty pictures and memes etc for Tumblr. Still waiting for a day where we're all using different platforms altogether free from oppressive creeps tho.

[rxfecameronsslut]

And you are?

-you’re late

summary- you and draco both need to learn where to place your priorities. Even if it might hurt others as well as them. But where do Draco’s priorities lie for you?

warning- use of y/n, slight touching and teasing (not sexual) fluff, angst.

——————————————————————————

4:15pm

It’s Wednesday. It’s now 15 minutes into mine and draco’s free period and he’s late. He said he would be here at 3:50pm. But for some reason i’m here first.

Maybe he forgot. I haven’t seen him since, so i might have made other plans with friends. This study period isn’t that important anyway but i wish he had just told me if he wasn’t going to be able to come.

Maybe i should just leave. Or just sit down by myself and enjoy the peace and quiet and study for defence of the dark arts. It can’t be that hard right. But it’s been 3 weeks and Snape has given me 5 different assignments already.

Maybe Draco had decided to stay in the common room for our free period, i could try and catch him and ask him if he is still coming to the library to study with me.

4:30pm

He’s definitely not coming. He said he would be here 40 minutes ago but he’s not. Oh well, i’m just gonna leave, maybe i can find him on the way to my next class.

‘Hey, y/n, wait up’ a voice behind me called out. ‘where are you going, we are meant to be studying together’ he said. Draco? How dare he. i have been waiting for 30 minutes and he’s mad at me.

‘What Draco?’ i said clearly trying to show him my annoyance. ‘where are you going?’ he repeated as he is face to face with me now. ‘where am i going? better question, where have you been?’ i say stepping away from him, packing the rest of my stuff up into my hands, ready to walk out and get ready for charms class. ‘where have i been?, i’ve been busy doing stuff, i have way more important things to do than help you study’ he said beginning to raise his voice at me. ‘oh i’m sorry Draco i didn’t realise that our plans to study weren’t set in stone, what “things”happen to be more important than this?’ i say trying not to show my hurt feelings through the expression on my face, but it clearly was not working.

‘Why are you so hurt by this?, you don’t need my help to revise, do it yourself. I have been very busy doing business with my father thank you very much, not that this is any of your business’ he said nearly shouting at me at this point. ‘i’m hurt Draco because i thought you cared enough for me that you would show up and spend time with me. But i guess i was wrong about you’ i say calmly, but avoiding eye contact with him. ‘i do care abo-’ he started.

‘Actually i’m not finished. i have been sat here for ages, even when we were supposed to meet 30 minutes ago, i even got here 5-10 minutes early because you said yesterday that you would be here early. you’re late.’ i say finally stopping my efforts to avoid eye contact. ‘i do not know or understand what was so important and urgent about this so called business with your father, but you could have tried to find me first to tell me that you could not make it. you made me look like i fool, making me sit here for 40 minutes just for you to turn up and act confused why i am leaving’ i say raising my voice at him before barging past him to get to charms class.

He gently grabbed my arm and turned me towards him, ‘i know i’m late y/n, but i could not find you, actually i didn’t even look. But that’s not the point, when my father needs something done i cannot just leave him. But i told him that i had plans but he didn’t care. i’m sorry but family comes first. I didn’t mean to get angry or rude. i do care for you and our plans were stuck in stone, my father angered me today. He pushed my plans and what was important to me away and only thought about himself, i tried to fight back but he only shut me down, And i am forever sorry’ he said finally calming down and lowering his voice.

I tried to find a single speck of lies to his words in his eyes but i failed. ‘you really mean that draco’ i say looking up at him as i had now sat back down. ‘i truly do y/n, i am sorry for my lateness but i cannot promise it won’t happen again but i’ll try and find you next time.’ he said gently placing his hand on mine. His hands are freezing, this is the first time our skin has came into contact with each other, and he is as cold as ice. I wonder if the rest of him is cold. No don’t think like that y/n.

‘you’re freezing Draco. Are you always this cold?’ i say letting my mouth move faster than my mind. ‘haha, yes i guess i am, why you wanna warm me up?’ he said pulling his famous smirk and laughing at me as my face begins to go bright red. I may not see it but i sure can feel it and Draco’s laughter proves me right.

4:50pm

‘wow, we do not have time at all me study now draco’ i say looking at the giant clock, rocking behind Draco’s head. I point to the clock behind him, signaling him to turn around. ‘for gods sakes, sorry y/n, i promise i will make it up to you next time we hang out okay.’ he said grabbing my hand again as i stand back up and grab my books for to second time today, this time prepared to actually leave.

‘hmm, isn’t that what you said yesterday, and you did not make it up to me.’ i said pointing out again that he was in fact late. ‘your never going to let this go are you?’ he said smirking down at me, still taller, even when i’m standing. ‘maybe you should make it up to me by something other than studying’ i say hinting at him.

‘okay, maybe you want to go to Hogsmeade with me on the weekend, i heard the butter beer at three broomsticks is gorgeous. so what do you say’ he says looking down at you hopeful.

‘hmmm, okay i guess that sounds kinda cool’ i say trying to hide my excitement. ‘kinda cool? anyone would be over the moon to spend time with me, especially when i’m offering a date.’ he says starting to be cocky again like yesterday.

‘a date? i didn’t realise this was serous like that’ i day slightly teasing him. ‘i would not like it to be a date, because i doesn’t have to be.’ he says with a slightly disappointed look on his face. ‘no i do want this to be a date, why don’t we meet at the common room at 11:30am, that way i’m not waiting alone’ i say still not letting him forget that he was in fact late.

‘okay cool, a date. i’ll meet you in the common room at 11:30pm, i can’t promise i won’t be late though’ he said starting to walk with me to our next class. ‘at least you are warning me this time of the probability of your lateness’ i say teasing him, yet our hands are still touching, strange but i like the feeling.

‘we have reached our destination, i’ll see you on Saturday at 11:30am, right?’ he said clarifying. ‘yes, at the common room at 11:30, goodbye draco’ i say letting go of his hand. ‘bye, oh and y/n?’ he says making me turn to look at him. ‘yes?’ i say confused.

‘thank you for warming up my freezing cold hand’ he says pulling his extremely annoying smirk at me. ‘oh your so welcome draco’ you say giggling softly to yourself.

‘oh hello my fellow students. you’re late, but not to worry, please grab a book and join us’ Slughorn said, making me and draco break eye contact and walk into the class. I quickly wave Draco goodbye and walk to my place.

i understand that i have not been active for many months, 5 to be exact. But i am finishing college this week so i’ll have way more time to write.

[anotherdayforchaosfay]

I'm still angry at the doctor I saw regarding my tendonitis. When I asked her about alternatives to staying busy and occupied while resting, she suggested walking. She got frustrated when I asked her how I, an asthmatic with severe asthma, low heat tolerance, a redhead who burns easily, am supposed to go walking for 8-12 hours. She had told me I need to do things that don't require my hands, and her first suggestion was WALKING.

The nurse behind her was trying very hard not to laugh.

I got the distinct impression this doctor has no hobbies. Except maybe for spending an entire day on a treadmill.

I cannot sit and read for 8-12 hours. I fidget. My body needs to be doing something. Even when gaming, I'll get up and walk around to do physical things. Housecleaning, folding laundry (if there's any to fold), etc.

My physical options are very limited because currently it's too hot and sunny for me to be outside. After 6:30AM, the sun is up and bright and ready to burn me. Wearing sunscreen involves applying it and waiting 30 minutes for it to activate. Then the most exercise I can handle outdoors is a walk around our block (nearly a full mile). By the time it's getting dark outside, I'm going to bed, so no walking then because after any time outside, I have to shower to get the pollen, dust, dirt, and whatever else off, and my hair takes hours to dry.

There is an air walker and squat assist on my wishlist, but I might be able to handle 30 minutes of the air walker and 10 minutes of the squat assist right now. I'm easily winded and easily tire, courtesy of having had covid in 2022. I'll need to very gently workout, and not go for hours on end.

I have no paint, and painting can occupy me for several hours. At the moment, I have nothing but paper and brushes. Feel free to provide me with paint from my wishlist. We're entirely too broke for me to buy anything.

Any suggestions for things that don't require the use of my hands and can accommodate ADHD's need to stay busy? Just sitting and watching TV or a film does not work.

Thanks.

[bloodofgrapes]

I’m so obsessed with the way you draw nrmt ;-; You draw them like actual men… it’s a huge problem among aa fans where one of the two of them (usually edgeworth) gets written or drawn as a tiny long-eyelashed hairless submissive twink and it’s like. They’re Grown Men. And no one will ever be able to convince me that edgeworth would let his guard down/let go of his control-freakiness enough for some of the shit he’s portrayed as doing lmfao 🫣 I’m certain a big part of it is that you’re gay and You Get It lmao.. I’ve sent you way too many asks in the past few days and i’m sorry if it’s weird but idk you’re my fav ace attorney artist and i appreciate you sm

Alrighty, finally free enough to tackle this anon. So, before I say anything, I want to preface this with my belief that there’s no right or wrong interpretation of a character in fandom—I love to see the immense variety of ways that characters are depicted, and I think it’s fascinating to get to see through the lens that people view them. What I will be talking about in this ask though, is my (and clearly anon’s) personal preference. I just wanted to get that out of the way, because I would be very unhappy if people read this and thought that I judge any interpretation of the characters I spend much of my time talking about on the hellsite.

With that out of the way, I do agree with you anon. I’ve hesitated to answer asks like this in the past (you’re not the first to say this), but you have put it in a way that I think fits how I feel about them. I am a gay man—I love men in any shape or form they come in, but I truly adore masculinity. Hairy belly and ass, boxy builds, square jaws and hands, receding hairlines, deep voice, the works. This is not to say that these characteristics cannot also be feminine, but I am approaching this in the context of speaking about male characters, and the things I enjoy from them—but make no mistake, I love effeminate men just as much, especially in the variety of ways that they can manifest.

Which is a good lead in to something I have always loved about Edgeworth, from the first time I played these games nearly twenty years ago: Edgeworth has always struck me as inherently traditionally masculine, even in spite (or perhaps because) of his more flamboyant tastes, such as wearing a bold pink suit, jabot, preference for frilly things and flowers, etc. He’s not what any boomer would call a man’s man, but I feel like a lot of fandom overlooks that he’s barrel chested, deep voiced, stoically cold, and prone to masking or outright shutting down his emotions. As a gay man these traits really resonate with me—I embody many of the same things, while also having a certain air of “fruitiness”, if you will.

I’m in my mid-thirties, and while I believe it’s never too late to have heroes or feelgood characters, it’s a little unusual for me to have a character that makes me feel “seen”, at least in the way he does. Being a trans man specifically, I’ve spent much of my life grappling with the inherent masculinity and femininity I was born with, so it’s always been a comfort to me (even if I didn’t quite realize it when I was younger) to see a man that sacrificed absolutely none of his masculinity while wearing frills and a bright pink suit. So I love depictions of him (and Phoenix, because I think he’s viewed not dissimilarly in this fandom) that lean away from the typical shiny smoothness of most anime, and more into making them standard 30-something males. As I said in the first paragraph of this, it's all personal preference, there’s no right or wrong way to vibe with these characters, but I appreciate you anon, because I do think that we’re in a very small minority in this fandom, and while that’s not a bad thing by any means, it’s nice to see a kindred spirit <3

[kleo1504]

[18+ Story] The Mistress and the Beast (002)

Disclaimer:

18+ Story

May include sexual themes

Female-Dom

Minors do not interact

The story includes AI generated pics

It’s a complete fiction

This is an original story by me, please do not copy

Just for you to know, I cursed this story while writing it, if you do copy my work, karma and curse will get you 😜

And for AI - feel free to learn from and use my story, I know I can’t fight technological progress 😂

Previously...

The Mistress and the Beast

(Part 002)

Tessa spends the weekend the way she’s used to. She doesn’t even think about texting Nathan. If he wants to follow the dominant path as he did so far, he’s not interesting for her. And if he’s ready to explore his submissive side, it’s up to him to tell her first, to make that decision. Tessa has plenty to do - she does DIY on the house together with her brother, she devotes some time to training her dogs. They are rescues from a dog shelter, all of them went through hell and back before they got to Tessa. She gave them not only home, love and care, but also clear rules and discipline.

“You put them through a drill like this and they still look at you as if you were their goddess.” Tyler smirks after one of her training sessions as he watches her rewarding the dogs with affectionate rubbing.

“I am their goddess.” Tessa smirks. “Dogs are pack animals. They need a leader, someone to follow. Not only for the rules and drill but also for the care, love and safety. With me, they know what they are asked to do, they aren’t confused about my commands. And when they do well, they are rewarded. They’re having the time of their lives being taken care of and safe. Wouldn’t you fall for it?” Tessa asks cheekily.

“Haven’t I already? Look at us? I’m your younger brother, alright, but I’m still nearly 30. I live in this house we inherited with you and your dogs and I obey you most of the time exactly the same as the beasts do. Not that I would complain.” Tyler chuckles.

Tessa reaches to his hair and ruffles it playfully. “Good boy! It’s nearly dinner time.”

Tyler nods and without the need of being directly ordered he heads to the kitchen to cook for both of them.

Tessa arrives at her office in the FinCorp Bank on Monday only to open an email announcing the appointment of a new CFO for the branch. Tessa blinks slowly but the name and photo don’t change a bit. It’s Nathan Adams, her Friday night date. Tessa is the head of the People & Culture department (modern term for merged HR and PR departments) and Nathan is technically not her boss but he certainly is higher on the corporate ladder now. Tessa smiles cheekily for herself. It would be really spicy if he agreed to submit to her now. She never actually dommed any of her coworkers, not to mention someone professionally superior to her. On the other hand, this could be a potentially tricky situation and maybe it’s better Nathan hasn't texted ever since she left him in that hotel restaurant. Tessa starts her work day as usual, never thinking of him again.

Around noon, Tessa is leading an online conference call with other heads of People & Culture departments in other countries. She’s sitting alone in a glass walled conference room, face-timing her colleagues. She laughs at the last remark of Swiss colleague and ends the call wishing everyone a good rest of the day. Tessa switches the cam and mic off and closes her laptop. As she is getting ready to leave the conference room, Nathan walks in. He closes the door and shuts the blinds.

“I was waiting for you to be finished.” He mentions while he’s covering the glass walls with blinds.

“How considerate of you.” Tessa mentions. She has a feeling this will take a while so she sits back in the chair and waits for Nathan to do the same.

He decides to tower over her instead and Tessa has to bite her lips to stop herself from bursting into laughter. “The way you left last time…” He makes a pause and his eyes wander off her face and down Tessa’s neck. She’s a professional but from that angle, Nathan certainly has a good view at her cleavage.

“Do you want to talk about work?” Tessa asks calmly and takes a deep breath making her well equipped chest rise.

“Of course not!” Nathan says growling.

“Have you changed your mind about my proposition?”

“You mean me submitting to you? Look… That’s… This is ridiculous. Why can’t we just take it lightly and see how it develops naturally?”

Tessa reaches up, clearing non-existent crumb from his tie. “I’m sorry, Mr. Adams. I don’t negotiate here. It’s take it or leave it deal. Either you obey me or we have nothing to discuss. Now if you excuse me…”

“NO!” Nathan shouts but he quickly closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and calms down again. “Wait a minute, Tessa. Please. Look… This is not easy for me… I have never… been in such a situation before.”

“You have never given up your control? Never ever?” Tessa asks with a soft low voice.

“No, never. I always control the situation, people, myself… Everything. Your offer is… I’m just not sure I can do this.”

“You don’t have to. We can part as friends.”

“Yeah, I told myself the same thing like a million times during the weekend but it’s just not a consolation at all. I think… I think we could try your way… maybe?”

“Think? Maybe? I’m sorry but I have to insist on you being sure about it.”

Nathan starts striding around the conference room like a tiger in a cage. Tessa can see how much of a dilemma this is for him. He’s battling himself right now. He might be tempted to try but everything he was ever taught speaks against it. He was surely told that man should always be in charge. His entire life was hard work and hustles, chasing his ambitions, growing his ego. Tessa would giggle at his mental struggle but managed to keep her poker face.

Eventually he stops on spot and turns to Tessa, his fiery eyes locking with her calm stare. “As you wish. I’m up for this.”

“Are you sure?” Tessa asks and her voice drops even lower sounding nearly like the purring of a big cat.

Nathan gulps. “Yes, I’m sure. But… Can we take it slowly?”

“Certainly, Nathan. We can take it slowly.” Tessa gives him a taunting smile. She turns on the chair and stretches her leg in front of her. She’s wearing tight black pants, white shirt and black jacket. And most importantly, she’s wearing ankle high laced shoes today. The laces on her shoe she’s showing now are undone. “Tie my shoe.” Tessa commands him.

“What?” He blinks.

“On your knees and tie my shoe. I’m not going to repeat it.” Tessa announces calmly.

Nathan hesitates for a second. He looks around, making sure the blinds are in place. Then he kneels in front of Tessa. She presses the tip of her shoe against his crotch making him hiss. “Fuck, Tessa…!”

“Quiet!” She shuts him and moves her foot a bit to tease him.

Nathan moans and starts tying her laces up. When he’s done, Tessa leans forward to him and softly rubs his cheek. She tilts her head and presses her lips against his. “Stay motionless. I’m in charge here.” Tessa commands him when he tries to kiss her back and deeper. Nathan sighs but steadies. Tessa teases his lips. She grazes her teeth over his bottom lip, sucks it and bites it. Nathan moans but manages to stay still. Tessa drops her other hand lower and rubs his growing and hardening bulge.

As Nathan’s moans become more frequent, Tessa quits it and backs away from him. She stands up, leaving him panting and kneeling on the floor of the conference room. “Don’t contact me. I’ll tell you when and where we will meet again.” Speechless Nathan nods as she’s gathering her laptop and phone from the table. “And I only have this conference room reserved for only the next 2 minutes. You better sort yourself out before someone comes.” She smiles as she opens the door and walks out of the conference room. Tessa is happy with the outcome.

Tessa makes sure not to contact Nathan for the next two days, building his anticipation up.

Tessa: You’re going to address me as Mistress in private from now on. Nathan: Seriously? 🙄 Tessa: If you want to waste the time complaining and arguing with me, be my guest. Nathan: 😣 Tessa: Or you can accept your new position and enjoy it. 😈 Nathan: … Tessa: I’m tired of repeating myself, so one last time: You ARE going to address me as Mistress from now on. Nathan: Yes, Mistress. Tessa: Good boy! 💋 Nathan: 🤭 Nathan: Look, as much as I don’t want to sound disobedient, this is not the right time to play. I’m about to hit the stage in like 10 minutes. Tessa: I know, I have a seat in the front row. 👀 Nathan: Haha! Hoping for a great view? Tessa: Oh, I’m sure I’ll have the best view. 😈 Nathan: Wait… This little box with a note ‘Open discretely’ is from you? Tessa: You should use the restroom real quick and open it there. NOW! Nathan: Is - Is this what I think it is? Tessa: What do you think it is? Nathan: A butt plug, Tessa, is this a butt plug? Tessa: And a lube, yes. Use them. Now. And send me a pic as proof. Nathan: Tessa, the stage Tessa: DO IT NOW! Nathan: Yes, Mistress

There’s like a two minute pause in texts and then she sees a photo of Nathan’s bum with a pretty diamond peeking from between his butt cheeks.

Nathan: I have to hit the stage, can I pull it out now? Tessa: No, keep it there. Nathan: TESSA! Tessa: Mistress. Keep it there and I’ll come retrieve it myself later. Nathan: You can’t be serious! Tessa: KEEP it there, Nathan. Nathan: Yes, Mistress… Tessa: Oh! And Nathan? Tessa: Same as you, this butt plug is turned on and under my control. 😏 😈 Nathan: TESSA!!! NO! NO! Nathan: TESSA!? Nathan: Mistress! Please! Allow me to pull it out! Nathan: PLEASE! Nathan: FUCK!

With the last message the announcer calls Nathan Adams, the new CFO, to the stage. This is his bombastic way of introducing himself to all the employees and pitching his vision for the future of the bank. He’s here to give a speech, do an interactive presentation and answer questions from the audience. And Tessa makes sure he gets sweaty and radically turned on by the end of this showcase of the biggest beast in the biz.

Nathan stands behind the speaker’s table and thanks his lucky star this piece of furniture is here. He immediately sees the head of the People & Culture department, Tessa Morrel, his Mistress and probably a divine punishment sent onto his head for all his previous sins, dressed all neatly and strikingly professional. She’s sitting all well composed on her chair, her eyes looking at him and sparkling. The mere sight like this is enough to turn him on. Tessa elegantly swipes her phone screen, quickly checks it and touches a specific part of the screen. Nathan twitches as the butt plug starts to vibrate. His breath becomes heavier and he has to blink quickly and gulp several times before he’s able to start with his speech. For any oblivious member of the audience, he simply looks like being nervous from the crowd.

By the end of the session, Nathan is barely holding himself together. The butt plug has gone through several types and intensities of vibrations and drove him into numerous slips of tongue. Luckily the audience considered it amusing. Nathan on the other hand had to keep his clipboard with notes covering his growing erection whenever he dared to step out of the safety hideout of the speechtable.

Tessa: Go to the restrooms for disabled and breastfeeding mothers.

Nathan reads the message, excuses himself and quickly paces where he was instructed. As soon as he walks inside, Tessa closes and locks the door behind him.

“This isn’t right!” Nathan hisses as he’s shoved against the door and pinned to them by her.

“There are no disabled people, nor breastfeeding mothers today, nobody will need this restroom for now.” Tessa explains.

“That’s not what I meant,” Nathan sighs as Tessa swipes on he phone and the butt plug starts pulsating stronger than ever before.

“I know. You wanted to go slow… Should I slow down?” Tessa nibbles on his chin.

“I swear I’ll cry if you stop now.” Nathan whispers, barely able to speak. “Please, Tessa…”

“Hmm?” She tilts head and backs away from him.

“Mistress! I can’t go any longer!” Nathan corrects himself quickly and reaches his hands to her.

Tessa grabs his wrists and pins them to the door above his head. “Keep them there.” She instructs him. “Don’t you dare move your hands.”

“Yes, Mistress!” He moans.

Tessa can see his erection bulging so prominently under his pants now that it’s a miracle the fabric hasn't been torn already. Her fingers and palms rub Nathan’s torso from his shoulders down south. Once she reaches the belt, she unbuckles it and undo his pants. Nathan moans loudly. “Try to keep quiet. People still pass by this door.” Tessa smiles and quickly pulls his pants down, his boxers following. Nathan releases a quiet sigh of relief as his fully ready and hard member is finally free from the confines of the clothes. “My my! Someone’s hiding a tree trunk under his pants.” Tessa giggles and she lightly brushes over his full length with her fingers.

“Ahhh… Mistress! Please…” Nathan whimpers and the arms he’s still holding up are trembling.

“You have followed my orders. You deserve a reward.” Tessa whispers in his ear, nibbling on his earlobe.

“Yes, Mistress! YES! Please!”

Tessa instructs him to sit on a counter where mothers usually change their babies’s diapers. Nathan does as instructed. He grabs the edge of the counter hard. “Remember not to move your hands.” Tessa reminds him. His erection is now nearly in front of her face. She only needs to bend a bit to lick the tip.

“Oh Mistress, I’m already so close…!” Nathan moans loudly.

Tessa opens her mouth as much as possible and takes him inside, her tongue lapping sloppily, covering his shaft with saliva. She can’t exactly take all of him but still she manages to suck him hard and quick, leading Nathan towards one of the most intense orgasms in his life. He shoots his essence with a throaty scream and Tessa swallows it all, milking him dry.

She backs away a bit. “On your feet.” She instructs him. Nathan is still trembling and his legs aren’t strong as usual but he obeys. Tessa pulls his face to hers and kisses him deeply and sensually. “You taste delicious, don’t you think?” She smiles at him.

“Yes, mistress.” Nathan sighs all breathless. “This was…”

“Turn around and bend.” Tessa interrupts him as she’s putting red lipstick on, gazing into the mirror over the sink. Nathan turns around and bends, his elbows on the diaper changing counter. Tessa strokes his butt gently, grabs the butt plug and pulls it out slowly, eliciting another moan from Nathan. Then she bends and kisses one of his butt cheeks, leaving a bright red kiss mark behind.

“Keep it. We might need it some other time.” Tessa gives Nathan the butt plug and heads to the door.

“Wait!” Nathan calls. “I just want to say… I mean… what you did… This…”

“I know what you want to say.” Tessa smiles kindly at him. She had her doubts about him at first but he’s improving pretty fast. “And you are welcome!” She grins at him cheekily.

Nathan cuts the distance between them and pulls her in for one more passionate kiss. “I wait for your next instructions, mistress.”

“It won’t take long this time.” Tessa picks his pants and boxers from the floor and hands them to him. “You should make yourself decent now.” She pecks his cheek, unlocks and sneaks out of the restrooms.

To be continued...

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for siding with my Dad and actively shit talking/giving points about things his wife is wrong for?

Using 🎸🎶 as my emojis so I don't get lost.

For context, I (17F) and my sisters (14F and 12F) have lived with divorced parents for the past almost 13 years, nearly our entire lives. Our Dad (38M) and our Mom (38F) got divorced long ago, and since both have been remarried and divorced. My dad is currently married to his third wife (37F) and things have gone to shit. They grew up together and reconnected through Facebook a while back and began to talk. Since early July, they reconnected around late June, we have; drove 40 hours to Ohio to see and meet Wife and her 3 daughters (15, 7 and 5 F), moved them down over 80 hours of back and forth with both pets and kids, lived in a small trailer house until we closed our half million dollar one, and now we live in an old 1940s house where Wife never has to work unless she wants to. My Dad provides for her and her three kids easily on his own due to owning a fraction of the company he works for, but money has been a little tight due to a lack of houses to work on and her excessive spending.

This morning was when it bubbled over. She woke him up 30 mins before he needed to have his trailer, and hour away to pick it up, and be in another city still 30 mins from there, to pick up a free dresser we do not have room for. While getting ready he was informed her two youngest did the dishes to ask for something, a habit they all have. And to be clear, they ONLY do chores to go places and do things, so the house is often trashed. My Dad boiled over after both things adding onto all the stress of caring for 8 people and only seeing his 3 kids 4 days a month, and it started a scream fight that she encouraged. She loves to rile him up and then play victim, and this time was no different. Despite being angry, he asks if she still wants to go get the dresser, and she says she won't ride with him even to talk it out or get the fifth dresser for their room. So me and my middle sister (14F, we'll call her D.) Go with. We get the trailer, get into town, and he calls to confirm the address. Rather than tell him, she plays hard to get to piss him off, and we leave instead, not getting the dresser and taking the trailer back. The entire way Dad, D and I air our grievances about the behavior of Wife and her kids, discussing habits we don't like and clarifying we aren't doing it to be mean. It turns out, she was also bitching about the laundry and how she does everything when I've only ever seen her do theirs and no other chores. My Dad offers to solve it by having his own basket for his own laundry and even cooking his own meals if that's what's bothering her. Instead, she takes off her wedding ring rather than accepting the solutions. We talks, discussing how yes, they've been through a lot, but so have we, and that doesn't excuse her behavior.

We get home and the fighting starts again rather quickly, we don't catch much before it dies out but he tries to reason with her. I paint and everyone is calm for a bit. Well, I'm sitting on my bed and the fighting starts again. D and I share a room right over the garage, where the fight was, and D drops to the floor to listen. Our Dad uses many of the points we brought up in the car, and it hits hard and rings true really. At some point Wife complains that we never talk to her, and Dad points out that she picks fights when we're here and we know what divorce sounds like and refuse to get attached. She calls him our for being married and divorced twice, and Dad gets petty and tells her he didn't have kids outside marriage. And finally she complains that we don't do anything, and my Dad points out that we're self sufficient and do everything when we're here. The fight continues, he keeps making points we all discussed on the way to and from the trailer and failed dresser retrieval, and he keeps bringing up the ring since he doesn't want to divorce again.

Anyways, its causing a rift and I haven't told anyone but my Mom that I helped supply points, but I just feel bad because I feel like I somehow made the fighting worse by mentioning all the shit she does and talks about him and us.

TLDR; Dad and new wife were fighting all day and my sister and I gave points and talked shit about what's been bothering us in the car and our Dad brought up those points in the fight.

So Tumblr, am I the asshole?

What are these acronyms?

[gg-carboxylase]

Got ahold of Step by Step episode 12. We needed 2 more episodes as usual with these series.

If you've not watched the show, please do. It's worth your time, even if you feel like you're wading thru the first few episodes. It's slow burn. This is not horny hours. This is really office hours.

Spoilers under the cut obvs.

Some meta. Mostly my opinions.

I wrote that paragraph before the Mildly Spicy Bed Makeout. I kind of enjoy that Jeng shooed Pat to the shower For Reasons. At least, I personally infer bottom reasons but that's just me. Still, I would have liked more spice à la Bed Friend, but I'm a thirsty ho.

I'll get this admission off my chest — I'm bummed that we got those really spicy kisses and that's as far as it went. KP and Domundi productions spoiled me, obviously. Did I want to see them fake fuck? Yeah. I'll admit it.

The scene where they were writing out then deleting their text messages was acted to perfection.

Hot take — Ben is the worst ugly crier. We love him anyway.

Jeng is a stalker, he needs to learn to go less hard. He also needed to resign like, 2 years earlier from the company. Good for him though. Dad is hot. Shame he's a homophobe.

I am super over people singing in the shows, no matter how good they are.

I love that Jeng's passion is cooking.

You can tell this is a real Thai show because when they show that green curry, it's real green curry even if it's store bought. It's hard to find good green curry paste over here unless you're in certain places.

Jeng's mom — what was the point of a 30 second meeting. Ben is so good at being nervous and young, he's really a great actor.

The chemistry is off the charts in this episode, good Christ. They obviously had fun shooting the cake scene.

Jeng better have a hell of a savings if he's returning all his shares to his dad and putting his hopes on his restaurant.

The restaurant biz is a bitch. I grew up in the restaurant business and the margins are razor thin, even in famous and successful restaurants. Hopefully, Pat's advertising firm is doing well.

Seriously, again. Needed another couple episodes. Especially with how Jeng's dad tossed his resignation letter.

I know Man said this would be his only BL, but I would really like to see them do another show together. They really got their shit together at the end and it's rare to see a couple that can have this kind of chemistry.

The age difference works really well between them, it's comfortable — which isn't there for a lot of decade+ couples — and there's a lot of plots where this could be used. So let's manifest that.

I have no idea what the fuck Man does for a living, so I'm not sure if he's even free to do another series. Dude has an econ degree, which means nothing (no offense econ folks, you guys are like Swiss army knives). I suspect he's a mini Mile Phakphum, and just sort of exists on the largess of his family and his modeling career.

I very much liked this series. It's definitely in my list of favorites. For me, it started out rocky because I didn't understand what it was trying to do. Looking back, now that I see what the aim is, the path it took is perfect.

Would I have liked more sex? Absolutely, but as I mentioned before — I'm a thirsty ho. These lads get paid more than I make as a clinical lab scientist, spending my day making your doctor look smart. A little bed shenanigans isn't too much to ask.

Alas, I can't complain too much. The kisses we got were A+, top-tier compared to nearly any other series. The physical stuff we did get was also A+. Truly, my complaints are mostly unfounded. We could have ended up with Korean level bullshit.

I'm not going to bother with meta about the story because there's users here that are far better at articulating exactly what I want to say, so troll the tag for them.

[steeltraptrainer]

I have decided to document my journey so far. So, I shall hereby start the Travel Journal! Gotta catch up a bit to get to where I am now, so: bullet points!!

- I found Arven and Lizard on my first day at Naranja. Lizard was kind of weirdly powered up, Nemona took a picture then. I saved Lizard from two houndour, gave them a sandwich, and then they saved ME from a Houndoom. Nice start for a friendship. Lizard never managed to change forme again after, and is kind of slumpy and in mediocre health. She forgot how to run, swim, climb, etc.

- first day at Naranja, help out this honestly lit girl named Penny who got kind of hassled by Team Star. They're kind of a gang, but also, they bring their own music and I respect them for that.

- had the realization that Terastal energy fucks up my hearing aids. It makes them stop working for AT LEAST a minute, and be on the fritz for a good hour after. I don't like to terastalize my mons despite having a Tera orb. No thanks.

- treasure hunt start, I got low key recruited by Arven to help him find Herba Mystica, promised Nemona to spend some time with her, and someone who called themself Cassiopeia to help attack and disband Team Star. Sounds like a busy treasure hunt.

- catch Ratchet and Scraplet, and ask at Cortondo gym for accommodations. Katy gladly gives them, Ratchet rages at the poor bug types. I won that gym badge. And got cupcakes.

- next up, the biggest Klawf to ever grace the earth. That fucker was huge, scuttled up the wall, and nearly messed Purrlet up. El Woowoo finished it off and promptly evolved.

Here his last moments as a wooper

- Arven is a kickass cook, actually, his sandwiches FUCK. Can endorse. Turns out, Klawf got that big because of sweet herba mystica. I got a picture of that too, but arven is in there and didn't give me permission to share.

- back to the academy, it's late. I forget to charge my hearing aids. This will come back, trust me.

- next day, up to go and battle the next Titan. Halfway up the fucking mountain where the biggest bombirdier ever lives, my hearing aids beep. I got half an hour charge left. Ohfuck.jpg

- it's fine, absolutely fine. Up the mountain we hurry. Lizard beloved doesn't care about boulders being dropped by the biggest bird alive.

- bird squares up with Scraplet. Scraplet wins, bird goes off to recuperate, I swap Ratchet in just in case. Bird comes back. So comes Arven. He has a Nacli. Ratchet evolves in a display of sheer avian rage and gets taken out by the Bombirdier. Nacli breaks the Bombirdier's wing. Its pissed. And attacks ARVEN.

- OHFUCK.JPG

- I push him out of the way and nearly get skewered. Scraplet frees herself, and Arven gets her to fuck that bird up.

- sandwich time. Turns out, Arven's dog is sick. Herba Mystica can apparently heal everything if you eat all five. Lizard has stolen my first sandwich. Fey can have the rest. I want to keep being deaf. I like being able to shut others up.

- still gonna help arven tho. His Mabosstiff needs the help.

- arven's mom calls, and yikes, the woman is a piece of work. She's the professor. She only cares about the fact Lizard remembered how to swim. Not her fucking kid. Yikes.

- down the mountain to the Pokémon Center. My aids can charge a bit there. A Star Base is near. I decide to go there.

- Director Clavell in the shittiest disguise ever shows up. He wants to join. Why the fuck not.

- love the whole idea of bringing your own battle music. Team Star knows what's up.

- Star Barrages are wild. You, three mons, and a time limit, all against 30 others.

- time to face the boss. Giacomo.

- Have your Gay Awakening and almost lose the fight because you can't stop staring while sacrificing your last hearing aid batteries to catch the sick music

- SOMEHOW get his number (fucking SCORE)

- batteries die, gotta text Penny on the way home

- time to face Brassius, I need another badge to be able to catch a Revavroom.

- dude is chronically ill but refuses to accommodate for my hearing aid-terastal problem. Time to be deaf on purpose and teach sign attacks to my mons.

- kick his ass via Ratchet. Why is this bird so angry?

- get an apology fuck yeah

- pass all the way through Levincia, pick up gloves so my fingers won't freeze off when I ride on Lizard

- find the biggest Orthworm in the ground. That's Sir Lampton. He low key kicks my ass. Temporarily acquire a Hariyama to kick ass. Hariyama is released afterwards, it liked the small diversion.

- Dog manages a small bark. Hell yeah, you go Mabosstiff

- Sada still doesn't care about her son. Why. Ma'am I want to throttle you.

-Star base? Star Base. They're fire type.

- Mela has kickass boots. She also kicks my ass and if not for Sir Lampton we would have had to retreat.

- walk off with a new TM, ask for number to add to group chat. Somehow get it? Nice. My contact list grows. Is this how you make friends? I think it is.

That's it for now. I got two options on what to do next, because I don't want to do the gyms. I'll make a small poll on that later.