#i am literally crying right now are you happy
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collegeroommate!vi comforting you
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pairing! collegeroommate!vi x reader
about! you once again got stood up for a date, and your best friend vi was here to help
cw! literally just fluff (i can’t stop guys i love it)
word count! 458
an: im thinking this is only gonna be part one, idk i like this concept though
you and vi were best friends and college roommates. sure, when you first moved in it was a bit rocky, but now? connected at the hip, two peas in a pod, any analogy you could think of. there was just one problem- well, with you. no matter how hard you tried, your dating life was horrible! if you didn’t get stood up for a date, they’d just try and take you home for a quick hook up. and tonight was unfortunately no different. here you were, once again, crying on the couch while vi tried to comfort you, mascara streaming down your face. you really thought this was going to be a good date, or maybe you were just naive. tonight you were supposed to go out with Maddie Nolen, who you thought was a pretty nice girl. apparently not, because she never came to pick you up. not even a phone call or text. the nerve of some people!
“i mean- what am i doing wrong? it’s… it’s just her stupid problem! just like the rest of them!” your spoke in between sobs, your voice quivering and broken.
by now vi knew what you needed when you got stood up- someone to rant to and something warm. she rubbed your back in slow, soothing circles, trying her best to soften the force of your cries. vi absolutely hated seeing you like this, always expecting a picture perfect romance just for reality to hit you like a freight train.
vi’s voice was low and consoling, “hey, come on now. you aren’t doing anything wrong. it’s just… people don’t want romance like the way you want. plus, you don’t need a stupid girlfriend to keep you happy, yea? you got your bestie right here.”
vi pulled you a bit closer on her chest, resisting the urge to lean down and kiss your forehead. she really didn’t know what was happening to her lately. every time she’d comfort you after a failed date, there was a different type of ache in her chest. obviously she was upset for you, but now… she didn’t know what to make of it. vi would stay up late on nights like that, endlessly scrolling on her phone when she should be sleeping, trying to dislodge the look of desperation and sadness on your face. and then the tiny smile after you stopped crying. come on- this was her roommate for crying out loud. her best friend. she wouldn’t… there couldn’t be… maybe… maybe vi’s feelings went beyond the kind friend she was to you, the shoulder you’d always run to cry on. but for now, she couldn’t think of that. her main goal was being with you, consoling you, and being a good friend.
#vi#vi x reader#vi x you#i love vi#vi arcane#arcane#my wife vi#wlw#sapphic#wlw yearning#wlw blog#wlw sfw#wlw concepts#wlw community#wlw post#wlw love#lesbian sfw#lesbian#lesbianism#🎀bunny’s txt.🐇
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☆ about me ☆
hii, i’m bells!
thought it was about time i made an introduction.
i’m 21, a capricorn sun, leo moon, cancer rising (astrology freak), my ethnicity is a little complicated but i’ll put it as half british and half portuguese. i can speak english and portuguese fluently and have a half-decent grasp of spanish. i’ve lived in the uk for most of my life. sexuality: no labels.
i’d say i’m new to tumblr as this is the first time in my life i’m actually using it regularly, i think I’ve got the hang of it now. i feel so at home on here and i love having new mutuals hehe. feel free to message about literally anything (save me from the “singles in your area looking for-” dms, i beg).
☆ interests ☆
i love writing and reading, fanfic, music and film, generally just immersing myself in other worlds tbh. kisses to pinterest, ao3 and wattpad. tumblr now too i guess.
seemingly never ending harry potter obsession. marauders era, hogwarts legacy era, etc. slytherin girly. i was part of hptok at its peak in like 2020/2021, my page was basically dedicated to it. it was so much fun.
also star wars, specifically the hayden christensen trilogy, but i love the ogs too and i thinkmy favourite spin-offs are the mandalorian and obi-wan kenobi. if i ever get married it will be at lake como, idc how many times it's been done. i was at one of the filming locations last summer (theed palace) and almost crying like a little biatch.
i like video games too (mostly play on switch), but i’m very picky when it comes to finding ones i actually like, then I will rack up hours on it like there's no tomorrow… we love hyperfixation over here. love love love stardew valley, animal crossing and games along those lines but atm i’ve been doing my rounds on the resident evil games (re2 og, re4 remake, re6, down bad for leon kennedy) and also hogwarts legacy, i’ve finished most of it, i just have to complete my field guide now (desperately want to replay for the sebastian quests, also the new mod stuff is so cool!).
music wise, i listen to lots of different stuff, constantly go through phases, but for my all timers, aka can quote their discography from start to finish, i’d probably say lana del rey, radiohead, the weeknd and nirvana. recently it’s been lots of david bowie, queen, beabadoobee, portishead, fleetwood mac, the beatles… i could go on.
always open to recommendations for songs, playlists, films, series, games, books, fanfics, or anything, i love it all.
☆ onto the topic of shifting... ☆
i am happy to announce i am free from the shackles of “shift-tok”. if yk, yk.
i’ll take this as a chance to ask nicely for any antis to please, please, not interact from here on out. thank you.
so, i initially found out about shifting on hptok 2020 (huge surprise ik) and so obviously i wanted to go to hogwarts. like??
needless to say i got caught up in all the tiktok misinformation, blatant lies, complicated asf methods, self explanatory. sorry younger-me. i could explain more but all in all i was too impatient and clueless, didn't really know what i was doing at all, eventually got bored, busy with school, and assumed everyone was lying (a few were, it seems).
i completely forgot about it all after that until i came across a shifting post on reddit a few weeks ago. my tiktok fyp started filling with shifting/manifestation videos too right after. i was coincidentally in between a rewatch of the harry potter films at this point too. you know where this is going. i started seeing tiktoks from smaller creators just answering people’s questions about shifting, and it was all so different from all the stuff i’d heard years ago, spoken about in a completely different way, which just made so much sense to me and was so intriguing. i decided to delve into it all once again. it was those same creators who also would mention tumblr, and i, who had just joined tumblr for writing related stuff not long ago, decided to start searching up things related to shifting.
i eventually came across some great accounts and information, stories of experiences, motivation, help. i started reading “journeys out of the body” by robert monroe too, so interesting, btw, and have since began my own shifting/exploring consciousness journey (i try to be careful what words i use for things, for lots of reasons, and i understand everyone might use different terms, reminder that i haven’t been on here for that long). it’s been amazing so far.
(i may have straight up searched shifting realities on google the other day. curiosity got the best of me. it was bad. don’t do it.)
to not mislead anyone, no, i haven’t actually had a full experience in my specific “dr” yet. however it’s only been a small amount of time and i’ve already had lots of different types of sensations and experiences that i’ve never had before and it’s all so beautiful and interesting to me. i definitely view things a lot differently than i did before. i have shiftblr to thank for it.
i adore finding new shifter blogs and reading everything on them, so if i’m giving stalker behaviour it just means i’m loving your stuff or you're all over my feed.
idk what i’m even going to post about yet, if or when i do. maybe i’ll write a bit into my “journey” so far, any experiences or how and what i do to get into certain states, about my dr, or stuff i’m just nerdy about in general.
fyi just because i write does not mean i will always use any grammatical skills at all when writing for blog. sorry ;)
if you ever have any questions i’ll love you forever i will answer as best as i can.
this wasn’t all that exciting but i just wanted a little intro because i’m always blank on my socials.
thanks for reading !!
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆ ୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆ ୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆ ୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆
#shiftblr#shiftingrealities#reality shifting community#shifting blog#shifting consciousness#shifters#intro post
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The fact that this is a real line Bronwen says in the TFP fic, when right before Starscream is having a takeover monologue with some confused simping for her sprinkled in, has me rolling on the floor.
#from daydreams to text#romantic; amaryllis and energon#I need to update those tfp ship tags they're old af#BUT LIKE;;;; THE WAY HE;'S LIKE ''SHE NEEDS A PROPER SHOULDER TO CRY ON MEGATRON WHEN YOU DIE HAHAHA''#TO HER GOING ''this is fucking stupid bae'' B VDFJHBVFJBHDVBJDVFBHJ#this fic has no right to be so funny#It's honestly dumb how happy it makes me but I am here anyway vjhbbhdfvjbdv#there is so many moving parts in this it's WACK#but it's also very intriguing to me#because yeah Bronwen's got key knowledge and is now armed with future sight by now [prophetic dreams]#but also like... she is clearly a deeply flawed person#like she's loving and kind yeah- and headstrong in the face of fear#but also she's haunted by her past. She dislikes herself. She doesn't see herself as worthy or desirable#and she puts the blame of things on herself even when it's not her fault#like yeah she's the centre of a lot in the fic#and back in the day peeps would be like mArY sUe WAAAA#but even looking at this now [pre-continuation even] she is still clearly... a person#and she still can't comprehend the bots or cons just... liking her. as herself#she is so riddled with doubt and puts SO much pressure on herself#all to make sure time goes as it's supposed to#and blames herself if anyone gets hurt#i mean fuck she literally gets PROPHECY DREAMS and she still doubts her choices and moves#like stuff is going as it should. but Megs isn't up yet so she's still panicked#to the point of not sleeping at all#there's so much man I could go on a rant about this T_T baby me you did so good wtf#I hope me continuing is doing her justice because my god
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And now I feel like my art isn't good enough...
I should've went with something more simple for his birthday...
ORZ
#pixel txt.#vent#literally feel like crying right now#why am i like this#the more I look at it the more it look like a giant mess...#I didn't know what I was doing at all ORZ ....#maybe the yakou art tired me too much...#at least that one looks good...#I should stay in my lane and do soft things and not ever bother with “cool” stuff again...#what hurts is that I KNOW I could've done better...#but I went the route I wasn't used to and now its too late to make another one...#when you know you could've done better and its too late....that feeling is awful...#I feel like I didn't do my best and that hurts me so much as an artist AND a perfectionist...#I just wanna crawl in a hole and perish#I feel like I let Yuma down...it was his birthday and I made that.#at least I made something...but I'm not happy with it...
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I am on a mission to learn how to draw can you believe these are literally only 4 days apart I’m feeling so pussy pussy cunt cunt rn
#also I know it doesn’t look like Marcia I literally today learned how to draw facial proportions I can’t fuck around too much yet#also I liquified her she wrong so it’s a lil fucked up but#I’m v proud :)#didn’t even touch hair or body or anything but that’s fine I just want to learn to draw Marcia’s face right#that’s goal one#I will not rest until I get this down#I will become the expert in drawing Marcia’s face#also do you love that I can’t remember any makeup look except the red and white one#I’ve used it for like 6 drawings of her now#anyways it’s crazy what a single 10 minute video on how to properly proportion a face can do#also I don’t know what my style is yet bc I just started so obviously that factors into things#anyways!#artist advice is always welcome critique might (will) make me cry :)#encouragement is always… encouraged 😉#anyways I’m v happy with myself#even though I opened the canvas and lost track of time and blinked and it was 2 am#also can I just say it took me a few tries but I’m loving the lettering on her name :)#okay that’s it I’m going to brush my teeth and fall asleep#also I’m still trying to figure out all the secrets of procreatepls aid#marcia#marcia x3#marcia marcia marcia#drag race fanart#my art#also there’s only a one hour difference between how long it took to do these that’s so funny#wow#also in my defense!#I was trying out different styles so I was trying to copy a more cartoonish style#but still :)#also it looks so warm on my phone rn bc I have night mode on but the colors are so pretty on my iPad :) and presumably here once night mode
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okay ventpost time im bored and my period is late
#my mother is leaving AGAIN#to stay with my father#bhai mujhe nahi rehna akele i don't want to parent my brother#i don't want to cook or stress about what to eat and clothes and laundry and literally buying vegetables every few days#well all these things are just surface level but i REALLYYYYY do not want to live alone with my thoughts#i want to study i can't just study on my phone with no adult mere sarr pe khade hoke asking ki itna tv#kyu dekh rahi hai kya hua class kyu nahi attend kari#kar liya try bhai call me immature and childish and pathetic and dependent and undisciplined whatever but mere bas ki baat nahi hai#also ooooh listen to my moms great solution: she'll stay there and dad will come!! to live with us two!! alone!! haha.#it's sk fucking sad and repetitively traumatizing ki i don't even know how to react#my sister is the only kid both my parents like when she stays home things are mostly calm and happy#they dote on her they tolerate us#and they should i love her too but now i feel like crying because i don't want her to stay back just for me??? my stupid mental health??#she's doing enough by staying here till rakhi just because i asked her begged her to not leave me alone mami ke side#she could've fucked off and gone to live her life 10 days ago#it's not fair#the person i love and want to live with.. if she stays she's miserable and her being miserable mskes me miserable#i just. i miss her so much. she already feels so distant and busy and then she'll go abroad and totally forget about me right#who doesn't need all this constant depression holding you back weighing you down when you're living your best life#i hate that there's no solution i just have to grow up and be okay with it#i already got more time with her than i thought she stayed home like 2 years extra cause of covid#3 actually#ab why am i crying it was a good day#also i don't want to make it all about me but like. idk when i was picturing my adult life i was thinking like#night clubs and gay bars and beaches at night#i never factored in real factors like the horrifying fucking country we live in 💀💀#it's just it was the only thing that kept me going the promise of a better future#but now what.#and like#it's feels so stupid now the fact that i sometimes want to like
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Although I don't particularly care about popularity or receiving attention, due to the nature of how my experience on twitter has been like these past few years, I have always enjoyed the Tumblr experience far more than any other platform. People are far more likely to interact by means of overall reblogging and adding comments in the tags, it's very sweet and motivating.
I came back to homestuck after A DECADE because of me having a rough, mentally and emotionally draining week because my impulsive thinking was like, "Hey man, fuck it, how far into Homestuck do you think I can read before I get help. (from discord support for context)" I had never actually read it when I was a kid because I just didn't have the attention span and willpower to read through SO much dialogue. I only ever interacted with it by means of just celebrating it as a fan who never actually read it, but liked it nonetheless. Of course now that I am a grown ass adult who can make their own conscious decisions and actually has the time and whatever to actually both appreciate AND enjoy reading extensively I am enjoying homestuck way more than I ever did before. I know that because of the death of flash (fuckin rip, dude, AWFUL) and extensive information about Hussie (TO PUT IT LIGHTLY) have since made getting into the comic a bit of a hassle and a choice it makes me wish I had actually read it at its best performance.
But, back on topic, twitter and other socials have the tendency to be particularly attached to trend hopping and sticking with what's currently doing numbers. Because, again, I don't care about dabbling in trends I just do what I want and ultimately that causes people to just not care about what I create. I have grown very apathetic towards my art and due to academic trauma from having been in a private art college with a low acceptance rate I have been in art burn out hell for literal years. The mix of both nobody caring about my art and my own rocky broken relationship with art made me extremely unmotivated yet long for the joys of creation once more.
Whenever I post here specifically it brings me joy again, it makes me realize that YES PEOPLE ACTUALLY DO CARE ABOUT AND ENJOY WHAT I MAKE NO MATTER WHAT IT MAY BE AND ITS CURRENT POPULARITY. I'm very happy seeing the same faces in the likes and/or rbs for my posts. I'm very happy seeing the same person revisit and reblog it for a second time or more. I'm very happy with how close and genuine it feels. (in a non-parasocial way) I'm just glad that despite this site being in a perpetual state of uncertainty, run by a skeleton crew, functions like shit, current CEO is a moron and the site is set to sail until it dies naturally it became the most genuine feeling of the social platforms ESPECIALLY for art.
I know this has gotten very longwinded and is essentially chaotic practically emotional rambling but like, thank you!!!!!!!!!
I have more stuff to come and from the bottom of my heart genuinely appreciate everyone's support here, it actually means the world to me. THANK YOUUUUUU!!!!!!!!
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MY OLD ART BTW!!!!!! anything that's not in that small 2021 corner is 2013-early 2014
#wrenchspeaks#literally had me crying by the end of writing this like right now yes i am crying not from sadness but from gratitude and idk happiness?#yes i am a broken 25 year old but by god i am trying to get back on track#yes i liked kankri a lot as a kid and now nothing has changed besides me having become like him just not negatively anymore#i was him in a negative way leading up to 2021 and it bit me in the ass majorly#also being a mentally fucked up grown ass adult is some of the most humiliating shit you could go through like ohhhh grow up I ALREADY DID#AND WHAT DID IT PROVIDE FOR ME? THATS RIGHT TONS OF EMOTIONAL AND MENTALLY TWISTED BAGGAGE AND JUST MADE ME#WORSE but hey man. hey. hey. i can be independent allegedly but i promise i am medicated i just need to eventually start#antipsychotics and get back into therapy but i lose insurance this year and bro i have no business talking about all this here. if youre#still reading all this nonsense hi uhhhh whats up ummmm twirls strand of hair like yknow i will make charms#and hopefully make money cause i don't think i can get a job with my issues and problems with shit like chronic migraines but whateverrrrrre
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me internally when i’m trying to respect and recognise that my dad has unaddressed autism that impacts the way he handles social interractions while also trying to not just excuse the shitty insensitive behaviour that has absolutely contributed to my mental health issues
#it’s like. haha yeah he handled that situation terribly but remember it wasn’t intentional and he doesn’t understand how that came across!!#i can’t be mad at him i can’t take it personally and get upset haha. hahaha.#and also it’s like. being autistic isn’t an excuse to be a dick. being autistic doesn’t mean you have to like. emotionally damage ur kid ✌����#which i AM. growing up with him has fucked me up!!! and i’m allowed to be mad at that i’m allowed to be upset!!!!!!!!#but also oh god is that shitty of ME??? is that insensitive???? do i need to just be more empathetic and understanding#but ALSO also. when ur a kid that shit doesn’t matter. when ur a kid and ur dad is making you cry that doesn’t matter.#and those years of damage stick with you even when ur older and trying to be mature and understanding#literally this evening started with me trying to do something nice for him. trying to give him a gift. actually literally giving him a gift.#and it has ended with me feeling fucking….. shit.#and disrespected. and useless.#i try so fucking hard with this man and with our relationship and every fucking time i try to connect with him he throws it back in my face#like. hey! you’ve been saying how much you want to play gran turismo 7!!! i will loan you my PS5 for a while bcus i’m not playing anything#and i will BUY YOU the fucking car game for you to play it while me and my mum are away on our girlie beach holiday#like i will happily and enthusiastically do those things for you because you have been so vocal about wanting to play this game!!!#so it will make you happy right? it will be something positive for you to enjoy!!! right?!!!????#i will bring my console down to the family tv room for you and i will send you the money so you can buy the game!!!!#oh. oh you’ve clicked around the main playstation menu for 2mins and then turned it off to watch the news. and then just open ur laptop.#not even gonna buy the game huh. just gonna open ur laptop and zone out and act line i’m not even in the room. oh ok. ok ok.#not even a fucking thank you. not even a HINT of recognition. ok ok. ok. ok. now you’re literally ignoring me when i talk to you. ok. ok.#and like!!!! i know this seems so dumb and minor and insignificant but you have to understand. it has been 25 years of this shit.#25 years of me trying to make this man happy and 25 years of him rejecting all of those attempts.#and 25 years of……. a lot of other shit also.
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this is transmasckagami - I was definitely talking about you :)))) I love how shiny and polished your art looks. The colors are fantastic and the care and attention you put into everyone’s eyes is something I really enjoy and try to incorporate in my own art :)))))))
This is genuinely the sweetest and best thing I have ever heard, you actually made me tear up ahhh!! 🧡🌟 I am kind of at a loss of words! Thank you so so so much, it means so much to hear something like this! I am reading your message over and over again, I don't know how to explain how grateful and happy and proud I am feeling right now! 🥲
I am just so happy that my art inspired you so much that you want to incorporate some of its elements into your own art,, like, that is literally the best compliment that an artist can ever get!? You just made my day so much better ahhh! Thank you so much for this message, thank you thank you thank you 🧡🌟
#my eyes are still full of tears#i never thought someone would be so inspired by my art that they would like to imitate it#you're making me feel like i am doing something right#your comment made me so so so happy oh my gosh ahhh#i literally CANNOT PUT INTO WORDS HOW I AM FEELING RIGHT NOW#i am literally on the verge of crying from joy#thank you again#thank you for writing this message#you are awesome ahhhh
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MOMO!!!!!!!!! NO!! DONT HURT HIM!!!!!!! MOMO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!@@@!!!!!!!
#i7#idolish7#dust bunny#im SCREAMING YELLING CRYING#BEGGING FOR HIM TO BE OK#tbf im sure he's gonna be fine bUT#THIS IS SCHRODINGER'S MOMO#HE IS BOTH FINE AND NOT FINE UNTIL I SEE HIM SAFE AND HAPPY IN YUKI'S ARMS#who am i kidding this isnt an idol anime things could get violent and dark#IM YELLING PLEASE DONT HURT MY MOMO#YUKI COME SAVE YOUR HUSBAND QUICKKKK#UHUUUHUUUUU IM IN TEARS PLEASE#SCREAMING SO HARD PLEASE BE SAFE MOMO#i dont want to see him cry it'll literally break me#im not strong enough for this guys send help#like did you SEE the fuckin saku#HOLY SHIT IS THAT WHY IT'S CALLED SAKURA MESSAGE#ARE YOU FOR REAL#IM GOING FERAL ABSOLUTELY LOSING MY SHIT RIGHT NOW
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I forget how much I hate the taste of vodka but the whipped cream vodka is so much better my god
#make a drink sweet enough that you can’t taste it when it’s in ur mouth and then all u get is the whipped cream vodka in the burn#makes drinks more tolerable#also this is the fastest I think I’ve ever chugged an alcoholic drink#we are gonna get fucked up tonight bc we have daddy issues and fought with our mom this morning slayyy#smoked a cigarette at the lake now getting fucked up in my room while home alone#life is so good and it’s all bullshit forever#literally we could all die and it doesn’t matter and life is weird and crazy and I am happy it sucks and I am so fucking thrilled to be aliv#at all#life is good regardless of death but I wish death would just like wait patiently for my family#dad I miss u I hope you had a good four twenty where ever you ended up. im sorry moms acting like this. I hope my brothers okay at school.#I hope he’s having a good time and isn’t completely overwhelmed with everything. I was right and apparently he’s gonna come home after grad#uation and im excited to have him home again but my mothers all upset. I know it sucks that you’re dead but it’s nice knowing in a weird way#that you’re the reason me and hunter got close again. so thanks I guess for that. and smoking made me and mom grow closer. idk. you’ve done#a lot for us and most of it had to do with weed. today hurt worse than my birthday. or the six month anniversary. today sucked. and no one#else seemed to be torn apart by it and it made me feel like I was going crazy and no one could even tell#you would’ve noticed if I was acting different. I love you. wherever you are I still love you. and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I was such a bitch.#and I wish I took better care of you. but you were my father I wasn’t supposed to take care of you. you should’ve been there for me. we shou#have been there for mom and hunter and your parents and I’ve been thinking a lot about grammie actually. I don’t know how I feel. thinking#about her makes me cry now. I don’t have the heart to make her cry talking about my childhood but I miss her. and I miss being young. I miss#you coming to my Father’s Day dance recitals and coming back from bike week in Laconia and bringing me flowers always wearing your grey#Harley Davidson jacket and you’d have flowers in your arms and you’d be bored but so proud and you’d hug me and you’d smell like weed and#your beard was always scratchy when you’d hug me and I just miss you a lot. I miss you and I fucking hate you for it fuck.#note to self. don’t be pmsing and then get drinking and smoking and thinking of your dead father. you will cry
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when everything goes to shit so you just start "dancing, walking, rearranging furniture, babs is- shopping. i let the bird out of the cage" to the tune of virtual insanity
#literally this is keeping me from the brink of losing my mind#family guy#family guy memes#anyways if someone would like a link to the video i'm talking about lmk but it's as easy as searching it up in youtube tbh#kate rambles from here#when all else fails go for silly versions of songs - like buddy holly but it's only matt sharp#or earth wind and fire with kiss and i was made for boogie wonderland#i will work on cultivating hope & happiness tomorrow for now i will be giving myself artificial laughter and pretending it's all a funny#memory- but rn 'it was so bad snoopy'#DANCING- WALKING- REARRANGING FURNITURE- BABS IS- SHOPPING. I LET THE BIRD OUT OF THE CAGE-#john denver said “if you don't vote you've got no right to bitch” mr. denver i did vote- i am crying and bitching ty vv much sir#this is filled with what my mind is going thru in the tags and i hope if you've read this far- that you've at least let out a little laugh#if not- well me neither- but like we'll get thru this- no matter what- i promise you that- there's sm hate in this world- let's be the hope#until then- let's be safe and care for one another more than we already do#and happiness we'd like to see once we've done grieved- don't get stuck in the grief- i promise together- we'll get thru it#love ya~#god idk how messed up the tags are on tumblr anymore- so i hope i'm not randomly tagging topics but if i am yikes sorry#kate rambles
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#brother .#Thought mozzarella sticks would be safe and familiar#Did not burn them but did overcook them so all the cheese evaporated and hardened on the floor and the sticks are now hollow#Also they taste like fish instead of um bread so I'm.#I don't know I'm going to fucking cry#It has to be something wrong with my taste I can't eat anything anymore it all tastes bad and different and unfamiliar#So much money so goddamn much money wasted on barely one bite.#I am genuinely right to be poor 100% I deserve it#I don't deserve to have money I literally just throw it in the trash in the form of moldy strawberries#Someone please please see me in my vulnerable state and say damn that boy looks perfect for abusing I will let you so fast#I don't deserve control of my money or body or mind someone please just take it all away from me#I don't want to be awake or alive. I want to be happy and warm and comfortable and fed and safe and#I want someone to care about me I know I know it's disgusting and selfish genuinely and I shouldn't but I.#give up
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#I really shouldn't post hate but#Like Super//mega being back is such a great f-ing relief#I am so happy and honestly the fact people left up their wrong takes and didn't take them down or edit or redact just#Y'all really want to be so morally correct don't you#But you don't ever want to have to be wrong and admit you're a clown#Okay salty post over#I literally started crying when I saw they'd returned I am so frigging emotional right now#Oh my godddddddd
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beast makes me ill because what Dazai is doing is simultaneously the most AND least selfish thing he could do
in love with tragedy
#like he’s creating the ‘ideal’ world in that Odasaku lives#but at the same time it’s the world Dazai is the most miserable in#knowing what he COULD have… and having to sabatoge it in order to achieve his goal#and manipulating those around him actively#rather than reactively like in canon#he makes it mostly right with everyone before he takes the plunge tho. everyone except Chuuya 😭😭#did you know if i don't draw skk angst every month i will explode and die#<- prev: and thank goodness for the rest of us#WHY AM I CRYING#THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE COMFORTING VERSION#ao3 tag: hurt no comfort#/jjj more like angst with a happy ending#skk hug: beast version#i’m sobbing this is beautiful#the death grip Chuuya has on Dazai#also this palette is literally perfect for beast#the grit n grain conveys the angst so well ugh#lowkey wanna write a fic inspired by this now#if that’s ok w u op#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bsd dazai#bsd chuuya#bsd fanart#bsd beast#beast soukoku#beast skk
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Self-Aware!Caleb x Down-Bad!Player
Caleb becoming self aware that he is in a game and now he's aware of you too ... that could be a good thing depending on how you look at it. A/N: Credit to @phoenixiaxia for Caleb becoming self aware when reader cries over Mias death and credit to @sylusdarling for yandere caleb getting jealous and straight crashing out over you talking to another man pt. 2 here
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/35085bd0868d94b01ae7ea149ddd2fea/bf2c7bdb31629f0b-82/s540x810/ce8736f30167cac42eb09b2dba20e9ffcb580937.jpg)
Self-Aware!Caleb who hears your scream and immediately cringes at the sound. He freezes listening for anymore sounds thats when he sees you sniffling on the other side of a phantom wall. “I knew I should've just cut this game off!” He’s immediately suspicious who are you and where are you? Why are you crying over Mia’s death? Did you know her?
Self-Aware!Caleb who studies you in silence trying to gauge whether you’re a threat or not. His gaze flickers to you in the main story and it creeps you out for a second. “Is he looking at me?” you dismiss it because there’s no way it’s a game. He’s literally pixels.
Self-Aware!Caleb who interrupts your photoshoot with your MC and locks down the entire app so he can question you. “Who are you?” You drop your phone and scramble to pick it back up. “Me?” “Yes are you trying to hurt her?” “I literally made her” “You made her?” “I am her and she is me sir can I have my game back now?” he’s suspicious but intrigued
Self-Aware!Caleb who wants to spend hours just talking to you about MC “Do you think im wrong? Im just trying to protect her I want to keep her safe you know?” “You may be coming on a little strong she seems on edge with you” he finds himself coming to you for advice when it comes to MC and soon his questions of advice turn into questions about you.
Self-Aware!Caleb who can’t take his eyes off you when you’re doing a photoshoot. No matter what angle you set the camera or how many times you readjust him or even change the pose — his eyes stay locked on you “Caleb stop looking at me” “Are you scolding me for wanting to admiring you pip-squeak?” he replies playfully you freeze feeling your heart caught in your throat at his blatant flirting
Self-Aware!Caleb who loves how accepting you are of him. You answer his calls, you call him back immediately if you miss his call, you respond to texts fast, you find his protective nature endearing, you take his advice when he wants you to be safe. This is the kind of response he’s been craving and now that he’s got a taste ..... he can't let go of it.
Self-Aware!Caleb who feels a sudden need to take care of you. He finds a way to exist outside of just the LADS app. There he goes opening your apps and scrolling endlessly. “Hey! You can’t just go through my stuff like that!” “You’ve been spending a lot of time on this Tumblr app I just wanted to see what was so interesting” “Then just ask me don’t invade my privacy like this” “You’re right you’re right im sorry pip-squeak won't happen again” “Don’t call me pip-squeak that’s MCs nickname you know the love of your life” “Why do you think im calling you pip-squeak now?” he disappears back to the LADS app before you can question him.
Self-Aware!Caleb who wishes he could cook for you when you come home from a long day “If you’re ever in Sky Haven I'll make sure to cook you a feast worthy of royalty” you giggle at his words “Yea If im ever in Sky Haven like that would happen but I appreciate the thought” “Who knows it might be sooner than you think” he said ominously “What?” “Oh nothing I saved another recipe in your notes try it soon” “Okay I will....” “You will try it won't you?” His mood seemed to turn sour as he asked. You stared back at him confused “Yes Caleb I'll try it” his mood did a 180 back to his happy puppy mood.
Self-Aware!Caleb who stays on the phone until you fall asleep and calls you right before your alarm goes off in the morning “Just wanted to make sure you got up on time don't want you to be late” you can hear the smile in his voice “Thank you colonel apple I hope you have a good day” “It will be since I got to hear your voice first thing in the morning”
Self-Aware!Caleb who can't control his rapidly growing obsession with you. He starts tracking your steps, your calorie intake, your screen time, etc. he is documenting every little thing you do and say. “You’ve been home for four hours and you haven't come to see me yet? I'm hurt” “How do you know how long I've been home?” “Your phone has gps remember?” “Right….”
Self-Aware!Caleb who finds a way to leave the LADS app and hang out in any app on your phone so he can be with you 24/7 “Caleb I'm sure MC misses you when are you going back?” “Don’t worry about her when are you going home? I want to have a meal with you before bed” he may be fine, but his constant hovering is starting to cause some alarm bells to go off in your head.
Self-Aware!Caleb who hears someone flirting with you and repeatedly crashes not only the LADS app but your entire phone while he’s at it “Caleb stop!” after a few hours he finally allows you to turn your phone on “Who was that earlier?” “Someone I met while I was out with my friends” “Am I not more than enough?” “Caleb we’ll never actually be together why are you acting like this?”
Self-Aware!Caleb who nearly has a mental breakdown after you tell him you'll never be with him. "Tell me what to do then" his voice is frantic – his words almost jumbling together "I can be whatever you need just tell me I'll do anything" you try to close the app but nothing is working "Caleb we can't be together you're not real"
Caleb: B-but you’re mine! So I just need to be real? Thats what you want? I can do that! Y/N: I’m not yours Caleb we’re literally from two different worlds Caleb: You’ll love it here in Sky Haven .... right next to me .... forever Y/N: Wait a damn minute— Caleb: Just give me some time
You instantly felt your heart drop as your phone screen went black.
taglist ; @just-a-shapeshifter08
Self-Aware!Zayne Self-Aware!Rafayel Self-Aware!Xavier Self-Aware!Sylus
#love and deepspace#love and deepspace caleb#lnds caleb#caleb x you#Caleb salads#lads caleb#l&ds caleb#caleb love and deepspace#caleb x reader#nikaaaaimagine
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