#i am going to bite someone

[cosmiiqueer]

why do like . animated minecraft series on youtube.com look better than THE MINECRAFT MOVIE

[solarwavejuice]

Yall not making it too easy to ignore current events

[pokemoncryptids]

There….isnt ghosts in the tower?

We haven't found any- which is the problem according to delta. We got called on because the ghosts has kind of dissapeared :|

au9fhghh this fucking music ista

[the-potato-beeper]

i had to update tumblr for the first time in months and i fucking HATE THIS

[melonlthawne]

TUMBLR???? A WORD???

[clearbun]

hot take i guess but it shouldn't be legal to make cashiers stand their entire shift. give them chairs

[aerodaltonimperial]

I fully admit that I was wrong in calling last night’s tag match. I was 100% convinced JungleHook (hereby referred to as “UngleHoo”) was going to lose, because the only reasoning I could find behind this bizarre match-up that never really made sense was that it was, at it’s heart, the Firm’s storyline—that they had pulled two fairly credible solo threats (Hook and JB) and put them together in order to set up a tag match that the Firm won, thereby securing the Firm as a stable that’s dangerous, powerful, and should be watched out for. (Not out of the realm of possibility, and something they probably need to do anyway to make the Firm credible.) This did not happen, which puts me back in “I have no fucking idea why any of this happened,” and I’mma be real, I was very sure I was right, if only because it was really the only thing that made sense.

Now I’m back to being really annoyed that they mirrored the original Hookhausen storyline SO HEAVILY with absolutely NO SUBTLETY and I don’t even have a reasoning behind it, which pisses me off. Also I’ve had a really shitty day already and I’ve only been awake for 3 hours, so whatever, now you get me trying to make sense of this bullshit.

As far as I can tell, the Hookhausen parallels are so intentional there can only be three explanations for why they are happening:

Lazy story-writing,

Intentionally attempting to replicate their former success in order to get fans on board with a new tag team, or

A larger story arc is still happening here.

Your choice which one you think they are going with. My own opinions vary depending on the day/weather/what I see on the internet/how many tantrums my toddler throws.

Let’s start in with the parallels, cause there are a lot, but before we do that, we actually need to mention that two days before the first UngleHoo interaction (the handshake), Taz tweeted the following:

On the whole, not a weird thing for Taz to post, since he doesn’t use his Twitter as kayfabe and spends half his time arguing with dudebros there. But in hindsight, this is kind of suspect, so we’re including it. Sus, man.

Heading into the first UngleHoo interaction, we start off with immediate Hookhausen parallels that are so fucking heavy-handed they might as well be weighed down with lead balloons. In the Hookhausen storyline, a wrestler (Danhausen) is attacked cruelly after the bell rings in an unfair fight (by Nese & Sterling). In the UngleHoo storyline, a wrestler (JB) is attacked cruelly after the bell rings in an unfair fight (by the Firm). 

Then, in the Hookhausen storyline, Hook goes out and drives the attackers away and accepts a handshake. In the UngleHoo storyline, Hook goes out and drives the attackers away and offers a handshake. They are nearly identical, except that the UngleHoo storyline is missing the 2 months of backstory leading up to it; as far as I can tell, Hook has never interacted meaningfully with JB in his entire career. Which is why him suddenly going to out to save him wasn’t an exciting plot twist but a complete surprise. 

It also goes against everything we know of his character, who cares about roughly nothing but wrestling and potato chips until someone crawls over broken glass to win his loyalty.

The saving, the handshake, it’s all almost stroke-for-stroke copied from the Hookhausen storyline. This was intentional. For whatever reason, they did this very deliberately and very obviously.

Fast forward. We get a very strange card addition 4 hours before Dynamite that announces Hook will be there. He has a 2-minute squash match with a jobber that added nothing to the show. Then, we see the Firm in the back of the arena toss JB into a dumpster. This was done solely to push Hook’s buttons and get him “into” the feud…I guess. 

The reason this feels super weird is that A) Hook had already inserted himself purposefully into the feud the week before, so he was very clearly already “in it,” B) they used JB as some strange “important thing” to Hook, who, again, had never had anything with the guy prior to a week earlier, and c) Hook failed to even sell this as bothering him when he just sighed, shook his head, and walked out of the ring with no hurry.

(In the dumpster throwing, Stokely dumps a bag of potato chips on JB/into the dumpster. This is insane. And obvious. And why are they doing this.)

But parallel-wise, this goes straight back to the Hookhausen storyline, too: when Danhausen baited Hook to give him a match by destroying his chip bag backstage. As far as mirrors go, it isn’t perfect, but it’s definitely mimicking the previous story beat, just out of order (the Hookhausen baiting came before the handshake, not after).

Fast forward again. We get to the UngleHoo tag match, and right off the back, we get Excalibur making a comment that Hook has only ever been in one prior tag match. Taz, also on commentary, corrects him, saying no, there were two: Danhausen and Action Bronson. This is an odd thing to get wrong, considering it’s not a big number (lol), and also because they likely had notes for this as the match started. Excalibur then apologizes to Action, saying “no disrespect,” which means he was the one Excalibur forgot about (a match which, to be honest, is barely kayfabe to begin with, so I mean, fair) and that he was referring to Danhausen with his original statement.

The match itself also followed the same beats as the original Hookhausen PPV. The funniest thing is that both of them lead in with an Adam Cole promo, but that is coincidence rather than intentional. The commentary starts with talking about Hook’s lack of experience in tag team matches - none vs. the little throwback shown above. Then Taz, in both instances, talks about Hook being a “team player.” (lol) They essentially start the same, except that in the UngleHoo match, Hook comes out first.

In the Hookhausen PPV, Hook actually begins the match, but is quickly tagged out by his partner; with UngleHoo, JB starts the match. However, in both, the majority of the match time is given to Hook’s partner in the ring and not him. In both, his partner struggles to reach him for a necessary tag and Hook offers his little finger waggles as he holds his hand out. In both, Hook performing a suplex is the big “peak.” The matches end with Hook’s partner getting the pin/tap out.

(An interesting point in noted in the group chat: Hook does a Northern Lights bridge when suplexing in the UngleHoo match, all the way up on his tippie toes. It’s a dope move. He looks baller as hell in his new shiny murder pants. However, Hook has never done this before for so long. He tends to just suplex without a bridge and roll off. It’s also, interestingly enough, a move Danhausen is very good at.)

At the end of the Hookhausen match, Danhausen and Hook join hands. This is the first time Hook had ever let anyone hold his hand up in the ring after a match, so it was pretty significant. In the UngleHoo match, we get a frankly bizarre interaction where Hook actually slaps the ref’s hand away, who is attempting to grab both his and JB’s hands, in order to just grab JB’s hand and hold it up. It’s…weird. Hook doesn’t like refs, but he’s never really done that to them. And he was VERY KEEN on holding their hands up together, a callback to the Hookhausen match.

(Of note: a print of the Hookhausen joined hand raise went on sale in the AEW store just a week or so ago. Over six months after the match occurred. Which is weird timing.)

(Of second note: the New York Times article about Danhausen went out this week. The article focuses very, very heavily on the Hookhausen team-up slash match at the end, going so far as to offering a running commentary about it. The match was over six months ago. It’s also an odd thing to focus on given that the article ran…now. Danhausen has had more matches since then.)

(Of third note: whatever ban they had put on Danhausen mentioning Hook is off now. He's gone out of his way to use gifs, talk about Hookhausen, and went so far as to say "Hookhausen forever" in his 2023 predictions as so posted by the AEW corporate Instagram account. It's also, coincidentally, interesting timing.)

Why this is all happening is up to you, but this is about as subtle as dropping a load of bricks on someone's head and then asking if they have a headache. I just can't figure out why.

[saltydoesstuff]

Laptop overheated while trying to doodle stuffs for some WildDogz stuffs and asks and I lost all my progress eiusadnsklm

It's only 70 degrees--

[oodlenoodleroodle]

I take care of the social media for the museum I work for, and I am desperate to make a Facebook post about the new ICOM definition of what is a museum, but ICOM Finland is asleep or something, they still haven't come out with the official translation.

So tempted to make a post saying "ICOM made a new definition several months ago and here is the Swedish translation of it, because ICOM Sweden actually fucking got it done in a reasonable time." >_>

[echoesofaheart]

WHAT THE FUCK

[thepigeonsfanart]

Getting fired from my job on pride day feels homophobic not gonna lie

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

The great regular sleep experiment day... 3 days past "fuck it"? idk

So I uh, I went to bed by 7 last night, intending to sleep the whole night.

Fed Pumpkin a new blender mix of wet food right before bed so he was actually quiet until 4am

This would have been great

Except all yesterday from 2 pm onward someone was setting off small explosives next to my window. This went on until quite nearly midnight.

By the time I fell asleep it was definitely past then but also ???? o'clock

I slept till Pumpkin woke me up at 4:20 am

Going to try staying awake today again and getting back to 8 -ish hours together -ish at night -ish.

-_- -O- -_-

fucking people

This is science because I am documenting it, hur hur...

It's not even like, a day or event unless they were celebrating fucking starwars day in our driveway.

*jedi hand wave* "Fireworks are dangerous and you want to let me sleep. You would rather sit at home and have a game of cards"

I am on a pension and also cannot drink coffee, but also I am not paid enough to deal with this and I have not have enough coffee to deal with this...

[ramphastestoco]

After forgetting abt me for over a year (again) NBKS (trans health care Norway edition) set up a phone appt today at 12:30. Guess when they decided to call me?

Trick question the fucking DIDN'T

[weareallrealizing]

im going to start killing people like actually. how FUCKING senile you have to be when there's a country CURRENTLY fighting a war that goes back to whatever the ussr did to that country. and even before that. fuckass ussr ethnically cleansed almost every nation within it btw! you think everyone was made to learn the same language and forget their own just for fun or what? your beloved stalin actually killed and starved millions of people! you westerners wouldn't know what is what even if your life depended on it

[axaki]

every day i go on deviantart dot com and i see untagged ai art and then i close the tab feeling ever so slightly perturbed

[catcatb0y]

You know honestly I think murder would be very enriching for my environment.