#i am absolutely feral about him and his penchant for putting himself between others and danger

[tobebrutal]

you ever peruse zevran's wiki and just...

" He is the only companion whose default initial tactics is set to assist or "rescue" the Warden during combat by engaging any enemy attacking the main character. "

[axther]

for a matchup: i’m a ravenclaw, infj, straight female that values authenticity and intelligence overall. i absolutely love learning more things. i am known for being accepting and easygoing but i’m also more blunt too. my favorite thing is when i can just be around someone and not worry about what to say. and once you get to know me i’m also known for having a dark (unique?) sense of humor! thank u so much

I am such a sucker for dark humour lmao i always feel bad but hey don’t we all (please say yes) 

#1 is...Todoroki! 

Au👏🏻then👏🏻tic👏🏻it👏🏻y

This boy LOVES it 

Yes he’s very passive about it and doesn’t show it a lot 

But it comforts him a lot that you won’t lie often, if not at all, and that you’re being your truest self around him 

He’s spent too much time with people that are two-faced to want someone like that 

So long that you’re genuine, you can say whatever you want 

(short of insulting him, of course) 

Especially if it’s you roasting Endeavour 

You: god what a fucking jackass 

Todoroki, internally, while externally looking uninterested: holy SHIT god THat’s My WIFE i hear weDDING bellSSS where’s the RinGGG

Also your humour?? I’m so sorry if i make it too dark but 

Let’s say mineta tries something 

And you get pissed

You spin around and just yell ‘Run before I make the Armenian Genocide look like a fucking joke!’ 

This gets the attention of everyone in class 

and also has mineta hurling himself out the door 

Since you’re the intellectual type with a penchant for dark humour, then that means dark history jokes. 

You could say the Library of Alexandria had furry porn in it

And not only would, like, three people believe you

It would go over their heads just how good that joke was 

Maybe the library of alexandria did have furry porn and we will never know 

That’s the beauty of it, yanno? 

But either way Todo thinks it’s funny and maybe he doesn’t get some of it but it’s ok bc he loves you :)

#2 is...Iida! 

Please for the love of god help this man get a proper sense of humour 

People like Todoroki have some humour, though it’s sometimes unintentional  

But this man doesn’t have any type of actual humour

So when you walk in saying something along the lines of ‘the murder failed and now someone has a concussion-caused amnesia’ he LOSES it 

‘You surely did not attempt to kill someone, right? Right?’ 

(tell him yes and he’ll avoid you for the whole day before realising you really were joking) 

Once he picks up one your humour he’ll try to replicate it

But of course it takes several tries 

(read: about a month) 

No one knows exactly how to handle it? 

But when they realise it’s coming from you they all relax

But then it poses another question

Is the class pres dating you? 

The thing about this is that the entire thing is more or less kept under wraps 

Iida has enough about reporters and fans buzzing around his family that he doesn’t want them around you too. 

So it wasn’t like he announced it to 1-A 

But one day when maybe Denki or Mineta is trying to hit on you and Iida’s doing his best to remain calm 

One of the girls tries to intervene 

‘Hey, aren’t you dating Iida, though?’ 

You just shrug 

And Iida decides that hey, maybe, fuck the reporters

And he gets up and just goes off

‘Yes, Y/N and I are currently dating, and I have full intentions of not ending it! It makes me very uncomfortable when others attempt to flirt with her, so please stop!’ 

And then he turns to you 

‘My dear, I am sorry about my outburst. I’ve just exposed us.’

And you’re just like 

‘Uh, yeah. That was the whole point.’ 

Iida.exe has stopped working 

Gonna need to boot up the whole family because? 

Who knew Iida could keep a secret so well? 

#3 is...Bakugou! 

Dark humour gang 

As we all know he has a high brain cell count for a feral bastard, so he always gets your jokes  

So after one about a man with a match to be warm for an hour versus being set on fire and being warm for life, he lets out a really quiet chuckle 

It’s really, really toned down, enough that no one should hear 

But we all know that the Bakusquad could hear it from a mile away 

Now the thing about this is that this is before you two are dating 

So when the squad puts two and two together they are so giddy 

Maybe not for all the right reasons but they are obviously going to try and help their friend 

Kirishima has cleaning duty with King Explosion Murder, but oh no, he saw a puppy on the way to school and he wanted to go check on it, but it wouldn’t be manly to leave Bakugou to do the cleaning on his own, and oh my god, you’d be willing? 

(later that night, Kiri felt like it wasn’t manly to lie to you about his chore, but still…) 

Mina had a study session between you, Denki, and Bakugou when Jesus! Denki got hit by a car! 

Okay so they knew that excuse was shit but they KNEW that you couldn’t be that oblivious 

Thankfully, they were right 

After about five times of that happening and six times that bakugou almost insulted you but instead choked on his own words, you decide to take the initiative 

During lunch one day you just walk over and tap bakugou on the shoulder 

He turns, about to fling someone out the window, but then he sees you 

He goes quiet and lets you talk 

‘Hey i heard there’s a new ramen place down the street and did you want to go with me?’

Bakugou doesn’t answer 

‘I’ll pay,’ you add

He’s dumbstruck, before howling 

“Do you have any idea how long I’ve been waiting for you to ask, shitty woman?! What took you so fucking long? And what makes you think that you have to pay?! Do you think I’m broke or some dumb shit?! I’m not fucking-’ 

‘We don’t have to go.’

‘I’ll see you at six on Wednesday, if that’s a good time for you.’