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brailsthesmolgurl · 7 months

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HOW WOULD THE LNDS BOYS REACT TO YOU FORGETTING ABOUT A DATE?

Just some mild fluff before I proceed to ravage you all with more angst writings :) Read my recent angst please : Damnation

Read my most recent fluff: LNDS Boys as Daddies

Warnings: fluffy af, sfw

Rafayel knows that you know he does not like waiting. But, he also knows the risk of your job and how it sometimes take up a lot of your time. But in this scenario, BOTH of your time. Rafayel sat at home, hands holding his phone, and his eyes would not wander off of the screen. Highly anticipating for a call, a text even. But it never came.

"Rafayel!" The door busted opened, and his burgundy-shaded eyes darted up. His eyes widened as he noticed your arrival, but narrowed again and he turned his head away from you. "Rafayel, I am so so sorry. I had totally forgotten about our date today!"

You walked in, pulling onto the hem of your dress, the one that Rafayel had got it specially tailored for you just for the dinner function you guys would be attending tonight. But, you did promised him that prior to that event, both of you would grab ice cream together. Until, you slept late the night before and you nearly forgotten about the date.

"I do not have the energy to deal with a goldfish. And, I am certainly not going to entertain you." He tossed his phone onto his couch and crossed his arms over his chest, eyes still not facing you. You sat on the marble floor, and reached your hand out to touch his thigh and you watched as the tip of his ear turned rubicund, matching the tint on the apples of his cheeks. Knowing him well enough, the pout on his lips would make him look like a puffer fish. Puff for me or puff me please.

"Rafayel, I am really sorry okay, I did not mean to forget about this date. I just fell asleep pretty late last night as I was filing reports for all of the recent areas that wanderers had appeared and the deadline is today." You sighed and rubbed your hands against his thigh. Eyes scanning his body language, hoping he would not toss a fuss. Not that you mind, but you figured that you would not want him to pull out of the event last minute as this dress of yours does cost him a pretty penny and you wanted the dress to serve its purpose.

His hand reached out to grab yours, to silently indicate you to stop and he turned around to look at you. The pout that was no longer evident on his lips silently made you wished you had teased him further. He actually looked adorable with that pout of his and sometimes it is worth the trouble just to witness it.

Taking in your features, dark circles seemed to be an accessory for your face nowadays. Sighing, he held your cheeks in his lanky hands. "I see that you have not manage to do your makeup. Would you like me to do it for you instead?"

"No no, Rafayel. I was late, I could not possibly ask you to do my makeup! I can do it myself, I brought my makeup along!" You mustered a smile on your face, hands rustling through your bagpack and you pulled out a small pouch, filled with all of the makeup necessities you need for an event. The sight of the makeup bag did not impressed Rafayel but instead made him scoffed at you in return.

"That is a small makeup bag for such a big event. My lover cannot appear looking like a hag, she has to look like a queen. And a queen I shall make her to be. I have better makeup equipment than you eventhough I am a guy." Rafayel tossed his hair back and used his hands to run through his silky purple strands.

"You mean those?" Index finger pointing towards the stacks of paints by the other side of the room. "God knows what other infection I will get this time. The last time you did my makeup with those paints, I ended up with conjunctivitis."

"Hey hey, now, you may insult the tools I have, but you never insult my skills, yeah? I would still admit I did a pretty good job with paint for makeup." He spoke proudly and he stood up, walking off to his lavish bedroom. It did not took him long before he appeared with a bucket bag in his hand. "So I made preparations this time."

He sat down on the floor, in front of you this time, and he opened the bucket bag to reveal all of the makeup tools. They all looked very new and awfully expensive. With silver handles and bristles that looked like it was made out of the finest hairs within the makeup industry you could imagine. "That is a lot of makeup." You blurted out. Can you imagine how many videos he had watched just to get the right makeup kit for you?

"It is to save you from having to bring over your makeup next time and gives me another outlet to channel my creativity. How about we both stay home for now and I take the time to do your makeup, yeah?" He nudged your nose, a smile forming on his pink lips. "I know that I do not like waiting, but for you, I will always be more than willing to wait."

Xavier stood outside of the claw machine outlet, arms crossed on the front of his chest and he was looking everywhere. For you. He glanced down at his hunter's watch. 2pm. But he has not even seen your face since the last hour. You were supposed to meet up at 1pm, but your no-show is getting him a little worried.

He took his phone out of his pocket, going through messages, sliding thoroughly across his message app to ensure he does not miss out on anything: Jeremy...work...work...Jeremy. He really has no friends I guess. Welp, less time for others, more time for you! But none from you. As he was about to give you a call, his cerulean eyes caught sight of you running past the square, before stopping to look at traffic and you continued running. By the time you arrived in front of him, you were huffing and panting. Hands on your knees as you struggled to catch your breath.

"Did your work held you back?" Xavier bent down, clearly concerned as he was analysing the way you were breathing. His eyes at the meantime, scanned your body to ensure that you did not have any wounds on you till he came to your shoes. It was rare for you to wear heels given your job and that you have to constantly be on watch for your surroundings. Xavier's eyes could not leave your pink platform heels. "You ran in those?"

The pointing towards your heels made you snapped your head up to his and his eyes widened, as if he was shocked at your sudden reaction. "Yeah, I figured I might as well dress up a little as this is a date afterall. And furthermore, these heels are only 2cm in height, it will not stop me from fighting wanderers. Stylish and practical." Your chirped, answering his question and giving him extra information that you know he would ask eventually. As you stand up straight, he finally get to take a look at your whole outfit. A white loose polyester-made sweatshirt tucked in behind a denim overall skirt, and it is clear as day that you had put on some makeup. "What are you looking at?"

"It...uhm...you look different." He said, hands coming up to rub his lips, a nature of his when he is either flabbergasted or in awe. "I think you look pretty today." His eyes caught yours again and you felt your cheeks heat up.

"Oh yeah, before i forget, I am sorry Xa---." You wanted to apologise for making him wait for an hour for you. There are times where you would be late to work or to a date, but being an hour late is definitely inexcusable and Xavier had every right to receive compensation from you.

"Don't be." He interrupted you mid way and disregarded your apology. "I can wait. I had nothing to do anyways. I even managed to take a short nap as I was waiting for you." He displayed a small smile, a comforting one. "But I would like for you to pay for my meal as you did made me wait for you for an hour." Hearing that request, you could not stop a smile from appearing onto your face. Getting complimented by him and also getting forgiven by him seemed like a huge green flag to you and well, you are his afterall as he is to you. You finally take your time to analyse his outfit for the date. There is no doubt he put some effort into this date as well.

A white shirt with black slacks, with a pale yellow cardigan for the an accent of colour to his outfit. Guess he is not that bad at dressing himself up. "You look dashing as well yourself." You complimented and his eyes caught yours once again, a smile emerging on his face. "I like the colours that you had chosen for today. It fits your aesthetic, especially with your blonde hair, the pale yellow really suits you." We all love the soft boys aesthetic, especially if Xavier is your type, squeal.

"I did took some time to research on the outfits that guys would usually wear for dates. Most of the searches showed tuxedos and blazers but I figured that would be too much for casual dates so I ended up settling for this." He gestured towards his own outfit, his tone carrying a hint proudness when he talked about his searching progress. "Anyways, what you do you plan to eat?"

"How does hotpot sound, Xavier?" You reached out to grab his hand and he took the chance to intertwine his fingers with you as both of you started walking down the street together. You noticed how some passerbys would eye Xavier, I mean, who would not? He is such an eye candy especially with the outfit he had chosen for himself.

Xavier looked up at the sky, what was once a sunny scene is now becoming gloomy, with dark clouds closing in one another. A rain is expected to be arriving. "Hotpot in rain sounds like a great date to me. And I personally think with you accompanying me to eat hotpot, I would gladly wait for you always."

The ringing of your phone blasted through the silence of your room and you were jolted awake. You hastily grabbed the device and held it to your ear. "Where are you?" Zayne's voice rang through your speaker.

You sprung up on your bed, the sudden movement made your bed creak and you hear another sentence came through your phone. "Were you asleep?" You hesitated, as you did not want his suspicion to be confirmed. But you did not even get a chance to answer before he spoke. "I am coming over now."

You hurriedly rushed to the bathroom, thinking you could tidy yourself up to give yourself a better reason to explain on why you were late for the morning coffee date you had set with Zayne since last week. But your late night movie marathon gave you such a dopamine rush that your had forgotten the dictionary word of 'sleep' and 'waking up early for a date'.

After you had brushed your teeth, you were going to take a shower next before the sound of the doorbell spooked you. IT WAS BARELY 3 minutes. How close was he to your house? The last you recalled, the coffee shop you guys were planning to visit was halfway across town and that would take around a 30 minutes drive. Another ring of the doorbell turned your fast walk into a straight up sprint, running past the corner of your house to get to the front door. But a slip on your floor mat, made you stumbled and you hit your shin against your coffee table and you squeaked. Yes, squeaked like a rat.

Once you got to the door, you unlocked the bolt and you opened your door, revealing the tall man, wearing all black, with dark features being his trademark. You adjusted your stance and stood still, eyes wandered everywhere, purposely avoiding his intense stare. "You looked like you were in your dreamland." His monotonous voice cut through the tension in between you two. "Is that the reason why you were late?"

You stood aside as he took a step into your house, taking his leather shoes off and he placed it on your shoe rack neatly. "I am sorry Zayne." You closed the door, and muttered your apology as you turned around to face the towering man. "I overslept and forgotten about our date. I am really sorry."

"You do know that if you constantly sleep late at night, it would deteriorate your health right?" He reached out his hand to the small of your back and he slowly guided you towards the couch in your living area. You nodded, eyes still refusing to meet his as you felt guilt eating into your gut. Noticing how you were slightly limping on one leg, he squatted down immediately to take a look at your leg. "It seems like the bang that I had heard just now was from you."

"I...I did not want to make you wait at the door as I was already late for our date." You muttered and mustered just enough courage to run your hands through his slick black hair. His hazel-green eyes looked up to catch yours and he seemed to relax a little. "I am sorry Zayne."

"Come, let's get you seated." Before you could say anything, he lifted you up bridal style and took a few long strides before seating you onto the couch. "Getting yourself hurt just so you can reach to me on time is not an ideal scenario to me. The last thing I would want is for you to be hurt. Wait here." He stood up and took strides towards your bathroom, probably to get your med kit.

Indeed, he comes back with the med kit and immediately started working on the small cut accompanied by a bruise on your shin, applying antiseptic on it before placing a plaster onto the wound. "I am sorry Zayne. I will not be late again. It is so careless of me to miss out on our date when today is one of the only days I get to meet you throughout the week."

"People forget, it is part of the human's nature. Eventhough I am busy, you can always stop by to visit me at Akso Hospital. I can schedule my surgeries to have short breaks in between if your concern is that we are not spending enough time together." His respond is the method he uses to accept your apology. He is not good with comfort, but he does have his ways to show you that he cares about you and about this relationship. "Does your shin still hurt?" The shake of your head indicated a no and he took in a deep breath, packing the items he had used for your wound back into the med kit and he took a small stool and sat onto it. A big man on a small stool making me gag through my laughs. Although the stool is not that tall, but with a giant like him sitting on it, his eyes are levelled against you. This allows him to see you at a better angle, to analyse your facial features better.

"How long have you been waiting for me?" You asked, eyes looking into his mesmerizing ones and he took your small hand into his. His eyes looked down towards your calloused fingers and he placed a kiss onto the back of your hand, his warm lips no longer a foreign feeling on your skin. Your cheeks flushed at the interaction.

"I figured I could fetch you there instead of having you to sit on public transports to reach there. So, I had my car parked outside of your condo since an hour ago." He said, hands reaching up to touch the side of your cheeks. "Although I was a little frustrated that you were taking a while, but I was more concerned on what had happened to you. You are weaker than what you seem."

"I am not weak." You responded, lip turning into a frown. The sight of you pouting at him calling you weak made him smile. "I was just busy watching movies that I liked yesterday night and I just happened to sleep late. But I am in no way weak or whatsoever. I can take care of myself just fine."

"I never doubted your capabilities to take care of yourself. But for some instances---" He pointed at your plastered shin and flashed you a smirk. "I am glad to identify myself as your appointed physician. But you said that you were watching movies till late night yesterday, and that you overslept?"

You nodded and he added on. "Then I suppose as your prime physician, I would advise you not to sleep late anymore. Instead, we can both watch however much movies you want whenever we are on a date so that could probably prevent you from oversleeping on our dates right?" He looked at you with comforting eyes and he pulled you to sit onto his lap. "And regardless, waiting for you will always be better than seeing you being hurt."

I may or may not have gone haywire on the wordings, so hopefully these would give you guys a good brain rot.

Drop me comments as it would brighten up my day and lemme know if you have any requests as well for any stories :)

#love and deepspace x reader #love and deepspace #zayne love and deepspace #rafayel love and deepspace #xavier love and deepspace #lnds #fluffy #fluff #lnds x reader

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quanatural · 30 days

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Doodle time🎵

P1:I paid tribute to this classic picture with my own painting style. But I think I just did a subtraction on the basis of the original picture.By the way, I referred to Ugarte for Peter Lorre here, because I think Ugarte is more suitable to attend the original party.

P2:I really like Peter Lorre, who is not bald in Mad Love trailer ... Oh, look at his little expression and chubby body curled up together! !

P3:Old Hollywood fans around me say Peter Lorre is like a puffer fish ...🐡🐡So, as you wish?I think this design is very interesting. Maybe I will continue to draw.hh.

P4:Just Professor Karl with sexy lips.

p5:I am practicing drawing Gogol.

Finally, these are reference pictures.

#peter lorre #fanart #my art #karl fenninger #dr gogol #mad love(1935)#mad love #myPLart

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jadeleechsupportgroup · 4 months

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Envenomate

azul's diet includes salad dressing and the blood of his enemies.

azul x reader

cw: mild blood, biting

also on ao3

gift for @boundlessentity 🐙🧡

“I learned some cool stuff in bio today.”

Azul glances up at you as he takes a bite of his salad. “Hm?” He has too many manners to talk with his mouth full.

You have a habit of eating much faster than him. Probably why you get the hiccups so often. But hey, food is meant to be enjoyed. “Yeah, like, all octopi have venom in their spit.”

He chuckles and dabs at his mouth with a napkin, then takes a sip of water. “‘Octopi’ is not a word.”

You scoff at him. “That’s your takeaway? First of all, language snobbery is classist. Second, I will die before I use ‘octopuses’ as a noun on purpose. I will accept ‘octopods’ as a compromise but it’s on thin ice.”

He merely smiles into his glass of wine. “What else did you learn?”

“Uhhhh.” You glance up at the ceiling like the air overhead holds the answers. “You don’t actually have tentacles, just arms?”

“Correct. I do, in fact, have arms.”

“Shut up. Also you could get eaten by a shark.”

“So could you.” He spears the last few leaves of arugula on his fork and swirls them through the lemon pepper vinaigrette. One of Vil’s recipes that probably cost him one of his eight (ten?) arms. “This does not sound like a terribly informative class.”

“Can we go back to the poisonous spit?”

“Venomous.”

“Whatever. Does your therapist tell you you deflect this much?” You take the last two pieces of bread and load them up with olive oil and salt.

“I am merely ensuring you do not commit false information to memory.” He repeats the napkin-and-water-sip ritual. “For something to be poisonous means that it causes damage by being ingested, inhaled, absorbed, things of that nature. Eating a puffer fish, for example.” His eyes take on a different cast as he gazes at you, though he rests his chin atop his hands with his elbows on the table, a tiny concession to the side of himself with fewer manners. “Venom, in contrast, is injected into the victim, as it must enter the bloodstream to work. Merely touching it poses no danger, assuming no other toxins with adverse effects are present, or the surface is not already compromised.”

You just sort of blink at him. “Is it, um…like…has it touched me?” One hand hovers over your mouth as your fight-or-flight response helps you vividly imagine what it would be like for your face to go numb with a deadly neurotoxin. He wouldn’t do that.

Though the hunger in his expression suggests otherwise. You really wish he would quit this diet nonsense.

“Perhaps.” Another laugh ripples out of him. The sound makes it feel like you’re underwater even though you’re in the dining room. “What would you do if I said yes?”

You have the abrupt, terrifying mental image of him climbing onto the table and crawling towards you, knocking all the plates to the floor, licking his lips and holding you captive with too many arms, watching you squirm until he bites you and you can’t move anymore.

Then his face lightens and he laughs cheerfully. “I am joking, my love. Besides…you would have noticed.” Another smile, another sip of wine and then water. Vil said it helps to cleanse the palate of any lingering acidity to preserve one's smile.

How reassuring. “This diet is messing with your head.” You aim your bread at him. “You need more protein.”

He has taken to running one finger around the rim of the wine glass, sending a whine through the air. “Perhaps you are right.”

You wish he would stop looking at you like you’re the protein.

Dating Azul Ashengrotto should have been frightening for reasons that mostly did not involve the man himself.

His line of work, somewhat. His clientele, certainly. But him? He had always treated you differently. Protective. Gentle. Sweet, even, though nobody would believe you for it. What he saw in you must have been special, because you had nothing to offer that would be of any measurable value in return. And not once has he roped you into a client’s contract or put you in danger.

The hell with it. You stand and go around to his side of the table to give him your favorite kind of hug, where you drape your arms over his shoulders from behind and bury your face in his luxuriant hair. He hums contentedly and lays one hand over the point where your arms cross, near what you are pretty sure is the space between his second and third hearts. His other hand finds your hair in return.

“You smell nice,” you mumble.

“You are much too kind.” He turns around in his chair enough to look at you, close enough to kiss but not actually doing it. His eyes drop to your mouth before moving back to meet your gaze. “And much, much too good for me.”

At least he does finally kiss you after all. And it doesn’t even taste like salad dressing.

{1} | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

#twst #twisted wonderland #azul ashengrotto #twst fic #twst fanfiction #twst fanfic #azul x reader #rexii writes #rexii writes twst

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bts5sosempire · 1 year

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𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: miguel o'hara x gn! reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬: n/a

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: crack/ comedy, fluff, (name) with that gremlin attitude, ✨asstheticque✨, getting on his nerves, established relationship, spider/non-spider (name)

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: "hey, it looked at me first."

𝐚/𝐧: help, I kennot escape this man...😔 there are some things in here that are what me and friends used to do in high school too. For funsies, especially the 2nd one. I hope some of my Spanish isn't lost to me too.

You were swiveling in your chair, legs propped up like a frog while spinning around like a circle. Miguel had been staring at the screen for who knows how long before standing up. Your spin slowly stopped when you stopped directly with his back turned against you and heard the chair cracking from the weight being lifted off. You weren't trying to make it obvious, but goddamn him. Every. Single. Time.

All those cakes all up in your face like it's your birthday.

"Holy fuck," you mutter before swinging your head to look at the screen again, acting like nothing happened, 'monkey do not see, monkey do not know'. Miguel looked over his shoulder at you, and he saw you eyeing him out of your peripheral view before averting to look at the bright screens within split second.

"Something the matter?" He caught you, and you smack your lips together before saying it was nothing. Miguel then hums. Idling around, your eyes looked at your fingers that rapport against the desk.

You smack your lips again, turning your head to look at Miguel, "Actually, there is. How do you carry all that ass on a Thursday morning?"

Miguel groan at that, "(Name)..."

You: "It's a valid question. You ever wonder you can replace Perseu's statue in the museum too?"

Then Layla's presence was announced on Miguel's shoulder with loud laughter.

"Izquierdo, derecho, izquierdo, derecho," (left, right, left, right) was your new sudden prayer when you suddenly lagged when a wild Mayday had appeared; then they nestled in your arms as they babble away. But your eyes were intense on one thing, and Miguel doesn't need to know what it is.

Miguel: "Querido/a..."

You: "Hey, it looked at me first."

With a whole bunch of spiders added into the mix, then you also added in there is a formula for chaos. Especially when Hobie is around, it's like having two devils setting the place of fire, Miguel should've kept you as a secret. The man internally groan.

"What's with you and...ass?" The man stops walking, pinches his brow with two fingers then turns around to look at you. Mayday had your face in both her puggy hands as you made puffer fish lips at her. She giggles when you tried to made the attempt to pretend you were going to kiss her.

"I like the extra cushion, okay? I'm sure you look at mine too when I'm not looking." Miguel was about to open his mouth to say something, but close it up when the only word that managed to pass his lips was, 'That..' A little smug look went across your lips.

There were rare days when Miguel was out of his suit; he was antsy like he was allergic to regular clothes for once. His work was always a 25/8 job, not a 9/5, then call it a day. There's no sleep for the wicked, you guess.

"Hey, hey," you appear into the room where he mostly stays and hooked onto a belt loophole and slowly spin the man around to face you. It wasn't until your hands settled into the back of his pants pocket. You were looking up at him, your chin resting against the crevice of his pecs and you smiled up at him. "I thought it was chill day?"

Miguel swoops down to kiss your forehead as a greeting by lowering his head. "I'm just checking," you squint your eyes at him and made a face, "I really am."

There was a knowing hum from you, and he swooped in again to kiss the side of your temple this time. "That's hard to believe; once you work, you work. There's no rest, not even a ten-minute break." Wiggling your fingers inside his back pockets to press the cakes, he tenses up, and you happily laugh when he is caught off-guard. You both almost topple at how he stumbles a bit back; if it wasn't for him putting a hand against the monitor's desk.

"Don't play with me right now, Corazoncito/a," Miguel warned, and you only let out another hum for him to go on if he dared. And he did. Miguel, broad arms encase around your midsection and change the position by hoisting you up, twirling you, and seating you on the desk. "I told you so," he then frees an arm. Miguel's fingers grab your jaw and press a thumb to your lips. "Now get ready for me."

Oh boy.

#miguel spiderman #miguel x reader #miguel spiderverse #miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x gender neutral reader #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x y/n #spider man: across the spider verse #across the spiderverse #spiderverse imagine #spiderverse fanfic

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golden-cherry · 9 months

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hello everyone,

I'm so sorry for disappearing but I am back and ready as ever I only have five more days in Australia (which is absolutely devastating, because I really don't want to leave), and here are some things I've done since going awol (again, I'm very sorry):

took some pretty awesome engagement photos in Albert Park (yes, right where the F1 circuit is)

went snorkeling

tried scuba diving at the Great Barrier Reef, where I saw a shark, a puffer fish, clown fish and other animals

pet some animals (kangaroos, wallabies, a giant tortoise, wombats, koalas)

drove along the Great Ocean Road with my fiancé and my friends

went to a karaoke bar on Christmas Eve (and slayed the exile performance as a duet with my fiancé)

I hope you have a merry Christmas and amazing holidays

See you soon and I love you all,

cherry

#personal #life update

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arcadekitten · 4 months

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Not the same anon, but uh... Could you give us 5 reasons on why YOU like Reginald? I got curious

He's very sentimental to me! He was one of the first characters I created for this world (second only to Mary) and I have owned him for a very long time! I made him at 15 years old (fun fact he was actually made in February of 2015) and I am 25 now and by next year I will have owned him for 10 years!! He has been with me through a lot and helped me out of some rough patches in my life so he means a lot to me. ---

I was very self-indulgent when making him!! I based him off all my favorite tropes and features of male characters that are still my favorites today! I'm often a fan of the boy characters with long hair or glasses or who are bit more studious/academic and he gets to be all that and more! And I think being indulgent with your art is the best way to be! ---

I love drawing him! It's probably because he's one of my favorites already but I always have fun when drawing him! I like playing around and doing fun things with his hair or playing with his facial proportions or putting him in various styles when I branch out a bit from his usual tie+collar! It makes me happy to draw him! ---

I like writing him! Sometimes it's a bit of a challenge but that makes it fun! I love exploring the ways in which he interacts with other characters as well as his speech patterns, and how he often likes to speak more "proper" and "polite" than others around him and I find it endearing, and fun to try and work into his conversations. ---

I like that he's a pufferfish! (Or maybe even porcupinefish if we're specific? I do draw him based more off those even though 'puffer' is like a broad term technically...I'm getting into semantics.) The idea that he has poison running through him always gives me a lot of fun concepts to explore and work with whether it be metaphorically or literally. Sometimes I think I should have created my own original species for everything but animals are pre-built with meaning and metaphors to them and are also easier to collect merch of and be reminded of! So I don't want to beat myself up over it when now I am happily reminded of him whenever I see a fish like him! ♡

#reginald #reginald tetra #reggie #ask #reply

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thatswhywelovegermany · 4 months

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Fußball

Der Fußballwahn ist eine Krank- heit, aber selten, Gott sei Dank! Ich kenne wen, der litt akut an Fußballwahn und Fußballwut. Sowie er einen Gegenstand in Kugelform und ähnlich fand, so trat er zu und stieß mit Kraft ihn in die bunte Nachbarschaft. Ob es ein Schwalbennest, ein Tiegel, ein Käse, Globus oder Igel, ein Krug, ein Schmuckwerk am Altar, ein Kegelball, ein Kissen war, und wem der Gegenstand gehörte, das war etwas, was ihn nicht störte. Bald trieb er eine Schweineblase, bald steife Hüte durch die Straße. Dann wieder mit geübtem Schwung stieß er den Fuß in Pferdedung. Mit Schwamm und Seife trieb er Sport. Die Lampenkuppel brach sofort. Das Nachtgeschirr flog zielbewusst der Tante Berta an die Brust. Kein Abwehrmittel wollte nützen, nicht Stacheldraht in Stiefelspitzen, noch Puffer, außen angebracht. Er siegte immer, 0 zu 8, und übte weiter frisch, fromm, frei mit Totenkopf und Straußenei. Erschreckt durch seine wilden Stöße, gab man ihm nie Kartoffelklöße. Selbst vor dem Podex und den Brüsten der Frau ergriff ihn ein Gelüsten, was er jedoch als Mann von Stand aus Höflichkeit meist überwand. Dagegen gab ein Schwartenmagen dem Fleischer Anlass zum Verklagen. Was beim Gemüsemarkt geschah, kommt einer Schlacht bei Leipzig nah. Da schwirrten Äpfel, Apfelsinen durch Publikum wie wilde Bienen. Da sah man Blutorangen, Zwetschen an blassen Wangen sich zerquetschen. Das Eigelb überzog die Leiber, ein Fischkorb platzte zwischen Weiber. Kartoffeln spritzten und Zitronen. Man duckte sich vor den Melonen. Dem Krautkopf folgten Kürbisschüsse. Dann donnerten die Kokosnüsse. Genug! Als alles dies getan, griff unser Held zum Größenwahn. Schon schäkernd mit der U-Boots-Mine, besann er sich auf die Lawine. Doch als pompöser Fußballstößer Fand er die Erde noch viel größer. Er rang mit mancherlei Problemen. Zunächst: Wie soll man Anlauf nehmen? Dann schiffte er von dem Balkon sich ein in einen Luftballon. Und blieb von da an in der Luft, verschollen. Hat sich selbst verpufft. - Ich warne euch, ihr Brüder Jahns, vor dem Gebrauch des Fußballwahns!

Joachim Ringelnatz

Football (Soccer)

Football (soccer) mania is a disease but a rare one, thank God! I know someone who suffered acutely from football mania and football rage. As soon as he found an object in the shape of a ball and similar, he kicked at it and hurled it with force into the colorful neighborhood. Whether it was a swallow's nest, a jar, a cheese, globe or hedgehog, a jug, a piece of jewelry on the altar, a bowling ball, a cushion, and who the object belonged to, that was something that didn't bother him. Soon he was driving a pig's bladder, soon stiff hats through the street. Then again with practiced momentum he pushed his foot into horse manure. He played sport with sponge and soap. The lamp dome broke immediately. The night harness flew purposefully to Aunt Berta's chest. No means of defense would help, not barbed wire in boot tops, nor buffers attached to the outside. He always won, 0 to 8, and continued to practice fresh, pious, free With skull and ostrich egg. Frightened by his wild thrusts, he was never given potato dumplings. Even for the woman's buttocks and breasts he started to develop a certain temptation, which, however, as a man of class he overcame in most cases out of politeness. On the other hand, a rind stomach sausage gave the butcher cause for complaint. What happened at the vegetable market comes close to a battle near Leipzig. Apples and oranges buzzed through the crowd like wild bees. Blood oranges and plums were seen crushing against pale cheeks. Egg yolk covered the bodies, a basket of fish burst between market women. Potatoes and lemons splashed. People dodged melons. Cabbage heads were followed by pumpkin shots. Then coconuts thundered across the scene. Enough! When all this was done, our hero resorted to delusions of grandeur. Already flirting with the submarine mine, he remembered the avalanche. But as a pompous soccer kicker He found the earth even bigger. He wrestled with a number of problems. First of all: how to get a running start? Then he embarked from the balcony into a balloon. And remained in the air from then on, lost. He deflated himself, just went phut. - I warn you, brothers of Jahn, against the use of football mania!

Joachim Ringelnatz

#german poem #football #soccer #european championship

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jamesnelsonart · 1 month

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Killer Whale: Puffer's Bad Ending

In the story of Puffer and Clarissa, Killer Whale is a lot of things. He’s a source of comic relief, offering a less serious villain than Sharon or Lord Jel. He’s a guy who’s very dedicated to the bit, as his name, outfit, and submarine are all based off of orcas. But most importantly, he’s also a dark foil to Puffer, and represents the potential bad ending she could’ve had if she never went through the character development she experienced in the comic. The loud, dramatic, cruel Killer Whale might not seem like he has much in common with the timid, smart, sensitive Puffer, but both characters share a number of key traits that make them mirror each other.

At the start of the story, both Puffer and Killer Whale are unquestionably loyal to their respective leaders, Sharon and Lord Jel. The two characters may be styled after a puffer fish and an orca, but they might as well be barnacles, given how they latch onto others. They appear to have no personal desires outside of doing what they are told and staying in the good graces of their superiors. It’s hard to imagine what either one of these characters do in private, as their personalities are watered-down extensions of the will of Sharon and Lord Jel.

Puffer and Killer Whale both have no life to speak of. It’s an accurate description to say that they both have no friends and there are no activities they do that aren’t acts of service. When it’s all accounted for, they feel like incomplete people. And that is ultimately due to the fear that dominates both characters’ lives.

Puffer is always being criticized by her mom and thus fears expressing herself at all for fear of inviting even more mockery or criticism. Killer Whale might seem like he has more of a personality, but his outfit with obscured eyes, wide shoulders, ab armor, clawed gauntlets and big boots make it clear that this is more about projecting an image than it is a genuine personality. Lord Jel punishes dissent and those who don’t seem useful, so this persona of a savage, loyal killer helps to continue his existence. Puffer and Killer Whale are both afraid to live and thus have no outlets to appear genuine. Or at least, that’s how it is at the beginning of the story.

Puffer getting away from her mom for a bit allows her to develop some and believe in her own skills. She begins to defy Sharon, and while she’ll probably always be a little bit clingy and nervous, the fact that she can make this change means she can hopefully make more changes when the time comes, leaving her story on a hopeful note. Killer Whale just dies. Well, perhaps that’s unfair; he does save Puffer and Clarissa at the end, but he exists as a cautionary tale about being a person who only exists to serve as a tool for someone else. Tools get discarded when a better model comes along, and that’s exactly what happens when Lord Jel finally has everything he needs to make the Storm Machine work. Killer Whale is discarded, so what does he do when he realizes this? He cries, because while he may be older than our teen heroes, he has not truly lived as long as they have. Some readers may feel sympathy for Killer Whale due to that moment, others may instead feel satisfaction that a man who has spent his whole live killing helpless people is finally feeling a fraction of the fear he inflicted on others. As the writer, it’s not my job to tell the readers how to feel. I don’t necessarily want all my readers to agree. So long as they felt something, I am satisfied.

Why did I write all this? Well, the Puffer and Clarissa Kickstarter just reached its first stretch goal, so a bonus chapter featuring a young Sharon and Killer Whale will be added to the book. It’ll reveal details about their lives being raised as Lord Jel’s servants. The next stretch goal will be for a bonus chapter solely focused on Killer Whale’s strategies for staying alive while working for Lord Jel, so tell your friends all about the Kickstarter so we can make these bonus stories happen!

#writing #puffer and clarissa #killer whale #story #comic #webcomic #webcomics #comics #update #indie comic #original comic

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fishyfishyfishtimes · 3 months

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I have a request, should you choose to accept it >:D My roommate's cat just had 4 kittens. I call her Koi, so I want to continue with the fish theme. So far, we've got Sturgeon, Lamprey, and Gar. The last one is a white tomkit with leetle black spots on his head and back.

I'm looking for a fitting fish to complete the set, ideally 2 syllables so I can list them in the cadence of Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Moe. Would you like to name the fourth kitten? :)

Boy, would I!! It would be an honour! An honour and a fine challenge!

Hmm…. From your description, I am immediately reminded of the noble zebra shark!

…although that one doesn’t have only two syllables. Zebra and for example sharky have two syllables by themselves though, and if you name an animal with spots “zebra” people won’t think it’s named after the land animal… but that’s too simple of an answer for me.

Oh, salmon have spots on their backs! Their backs tend to be darker also, but not always; they are often a shiny, light silver colour at sea, which would fit a white kitten. Look at this Atlantic salmon for example:

Sea trout also sport spots on a light background. The words are separate but it does have two syllables, all together.

Many species of pufferfish and blowfish have spots as well, however, uh, “blowfish” might be a bit of a mean name for a cat… but pufferfish can be shortened to “puffer”!

And that's about all the sensible ones I could think of. Perhaps these suggestions can give you a bit of food for thought! It is absolutely delightful that him and his siblings will be fish :) Congrats to you and your roommate, and Koi of course, for the babies!!!!

#please update me on the kittens!#asks #worldbuilding-tomfoolery

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demonslayedher · 1 year

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Tengen's Favorite: Fugu

A.k.a., the pufferfish, a flamboyant way to flirt with death by tetrodotoxin.

"Sempai, you didn't!" you might be shaking your screens as a way to shake sense into me. "Sempai, I thought you wouldn't risk your life for Kimetsu Kitchen!" So you say, but I'd like to remind you that I am a bad cook and I could probably find less flamboyant methods of culinary death. But also I am here to educate, and guess what? This isn't my first time eating fugu. It's time to knock the flamboyance down a notch by telling you that fugu is more commonly consumed than you might think, as well as give you the details about Uzui Tengen's favorite food in a safe way.

Because yes, you should mind safety.

Cutting out the liver and other toxic organs is a very precise, very crucial process, so let's allow Hinatsuru to concentrate and ask our local fish-fan and poison expert to tell us more.

"Thank you for asking! Did you know pufferfish don't make this neurotoxin themselves? They get it from eating things like mollusks and bacteria, so I'll bet in the future raising these fish in farms with controlled diets will be popular. The tetrodotoxin, or TTX, blocks the passage of sodium ions into a nerve cell, thereby not letting signals to contract reach the muscles. Although there is no antidote, it's a poison humans can metabolize rather quickly, provided they have artificial respiratory assistance. The paralysis and all the other symptoms sure won't be fun, though!"

Thanks, Shinobu! Taisho Secret: Shinobu's goldfish is named Fugu.

She's right about the farmed fugu, and I've heard it said that people who can taste a difference between farmed fugu and wild fugu tend to prefer it farmed anyway. What's also important to note is that there are many varieties of fugu, and "torafugu" (tiger puffer) is the safest variety, and what is typically consumed. Although some people say the livers are the best part, they are typically rich people who wind up eating their words later on. Don't listen to them, they are dead.

We'll pause here to acknowledge the history, because not everyone who has ingested wild fugu has doomed themselves to consciously watching themselves suffocate over the course of a few hours. There are records of use their use in Chinese medicine, and even though Toyotomi Hideyoshi (one of the three great unifiers of Japan) formally banned their consumption and the Tokugawa shogunate upheld this ban, people continued to consume them anyway, especially in areas where the Tokugawa shogun was not popular. (I'd like to imagine some Uzui ancestors ate fugu out of spite.)

One region not especially privy to the shogunate was the Choshu domain, in modern day Yamaguchi prefecture. This domain played a major role in overthrowing the shogunate and establishing the Meiji government, and the first prime minister, Itou Hirobumi, was from Yamaguchi. The story goes that in 1887, it was on visit down at the very western tip of Japan's main island that he stayed at an inn and wanted fish, and the lady of the establishment had no fish to serve him except the illegal pufferfish. She decided it was better to risk what might look like an attempted assassination of the top guy in the country than to serve him a subpar meal.

Well, bam, it was so good that pufferfish was legal the following year! By my calculations and presumed dates that KnY takes place, that means it was already legal before Tengen was born. Sorry, buddy, you don't get to be that edgy.

As for how to eat it, the most iconic way is to eat it raw, sliced so thin that you can still see elaborate patterns on the dishes through the translucent flesh. This is called "tessa." It's often arranged in elegant patterns evocative of chrysanthemums, or on festive occasions, like a phoenix. It's most often a winter dish, but you can get it all year round. It has a very, very light, rather unflamboyant flavor, and is therefore typically eaten with a special variety of onions grown to accompany it, and other condiments like ponzu, citrus, and momiji-oroshi (grated daikon with chili pepper).

The main draw is the texture of the fish. As someone who enjoys sashimi, I did find the texture of tessa very, very nice when I recently got a chance to try it. The same meal also served the skin, and the flesh cooked into a rice porridge dish.

I wonder if Hinatsuru is almost done?

Not yet. Then let's talk about incidents and safety!

Basically, if you're not in Japan: DON'T DO IT. Heck, if you're in the European Union, it's illegal in the first place. There are very, ve-r-r-r-y slim opportunities of eating it in the United States after it is sourced from Japan, and although frozen tessa can travel, really, why bother eating in New York City? If you have that budget to spend, just fly to Japan. Anywhere else... just don't do it. The restaurant fatalities in recent years have primarily been in countries that don't have as stringent of a training and certification process as Japan. Japan also has a small handful of cases each year, but they don't usually end in fatalities because the accidental poisonings may not always be a large dose, and the victims received medical attention that got them through the crucial hours of paralysis. Also, those cases have typically been due to overconfident fishermen, not mistakes made by industry professionals.

But if you're in Japan----oh! It looks like Hinatsuru is done.

All of those examples? Things I have eaten in real life, often under the mistaken impression that "fugu" referred to two different kinds of fish (as happens sometimes), as there was no way I'd have eaten fugu without signing a waiver first, right???

No. Not at all. It is totally realistic to find yourself in a situation where you are served fugu without realizing what it is (though I imagine most tourists don't find themselves in these situations unless they have a guide who planned things without asking about dietary preferences). To demystify this fish a bit, there is so much fugu consumed without incident that you can get to a point where the possibility of poison doesn't even cross your mind. They sell it at a regular grocery story just down the street from where I live in a place that is not famous for fugu or anything like that. (Also, no one brings it up as much, but raw eel is toxic too! You never see it available for sale unless it's been precooked or specially marinated. Again, industry standards.)

Granted, I was still nervous about eating tessa, and the danger is still part of the thrill of fugu, though the industry stresses its merits as a tasty and (otherwise) healthy fish. I get the feeling that if Tengen lived in the Reiwa era, he'd find pufferfish disappointingly lower risk now than suits his thrill. Nonetheless, although I'll eat it if it's served to me, it is not something I go out of my way to eat.

But I will state it again: ONLY eat pufferfish that has been prepared by a professional in Japan. Otherwise, DO NOT.

#kimetsu kitchen #uzui tengen #uzui makio #fugu #uzui hinatsuru #uzui suma #my art #my dumb art

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