#i am SO interested in all of you i am just a hurricane trying to do drafts between essays projects and two jobs
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welp my babes, i fought it for a while, but i'm going to have to implement drafts and inbox replies to be queued for a little bit. ( gonna add it to my pinned post ) this month i'm meant to be submitting my ethics proposal for my project and last minute my supervisor has been signed off after weeks of cancelling our meetings last minute so your girl has to get fucking focused because i have....less than nothing to work with other than my own concept of the project. this will mean i need to actually monitor my hours this month to divide my time, because otherwise i end up scrolling here for far too long - i'll still be around in the evenings but replies will all be queued until possibly the new year tbh thank you to everyone who is waiting on replies from me i promise i am Trying
#* ˖ 🕸️ ⠀out of sins⠀›⠀( ooc ).#i feel bad because some drafts have hit the month mark#and i know i dont need to worry bc you're all lovely#its just i dont want people thinking i've lot interest#i am SO interested in all of you i am just a hurricane trying to do drafts between essays projects and two jobs#i'm borderline on a breakdown over this ethics proposal because i was meant to have support and i've been emailed to say shes now signed of#the draft is due in two days and they've said they're searching for someone to replace her#i cant have a hiatus bc writing angel is like th eonly non stress atm so#queued stuff for now
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The Eye of the Hurricane [4] - Spark
A.N: Here’s the new chapter my loves! ❤️ I hope you’ll like it, and please don’t forget to tell me what you think, thank you! ❤️
Summary: A quiet night on the rooftop holds new promises.
Word Count: 3500
Pairing: MobBoss!Bucky Barnes x Reader
Warnings: Violence, death, guns, crime, blood, explicit language. This is an AU, friendly reminder that I don’t condone any of the actions depicted on this story and please read with care.
Series Masterlist
“I’m not saying my best friend in the entire world betrayed me, but I’m kind of tempted to change her name into Brutus in my contacts.”
“Just because she cancelled on this dinner you mentioned?”
“It’s a tradition at this point,” you said, leaning back on the couch. “Us and the Barnes family get together every two months, we’ve started it way before my mom passed away. I get that it’s the bachelorette party of her friend’s sister, but still!”
Dr. Cooper smiled calmly.
“Are you nervous because Bucky is going to be there?”
Your head shot up and you forced a nonchalant laugh.
“Bucky doesn’t make me nervous,” you said, the words coming out of your mouth in a rush and she raised her brows.
“Doesn’t he?”
“He annoys me,” you pointed out. “There’s a difference.”
“I can see that,” she said. “And why does he annoy you?”
Your eyes snapped up at hers and you shifted your weight on the couch.
“We have history.”
She hummed. “What kind of history?”
You nibbled on your lip, your stomach doing a flip at the memory but you pushed it to the back of your mind, rolling your shoulders back.
“Let’s change the subject.”
She thought for a moment, then put aside her notebook to with a sigh.
“Y/N,” she said. “We’ve been having these therapy sessions for three months now, am I correct?”
“Yes,” you said. “Sarah Wilson recommended you, she’s a good friend of mine.”
“And you were seeing Dr. Phillips before?”
“No offense to Dr. Phillips but I don’t think we were a good match.”
She nodded.
“That can happen,” she said. “But I just need to make sure you understand that if these therapy sessions are going to work, you will have to step out of your comfort zone sometimes.”
“Oh, therapy isn’t in my comfort zone,” you said with a wave of your hand. “You’d think it would be, after years and years of experience but…”
“I’m aware this is not what you want to hear but for us to make progress, you will have to be open with me,” she said. “Instead of changing the subject all the time.”
You smiled. “I don’t think me being completely open with you is in your best interest.”
“Why not?”
“Just a hunch,” you stated, your voice completely flat and she hummed.
“How about this?” she said. “Perhaps you could just try sharing something small with me. I’m not saying you have to share every single thing if you’re not comfortable with it, but…maybe something that happened recently and how you reacted to it?”
For some reason, “Someone tried to shoot me a week ago” didn’t feel like it was a great conversation starter so you leaned back, looking up at the ceiling to come up with something.
“I’ve recently found myself in sort of an… unideal situation,” you ended up saying and she nodded her head.
“That’s a wonderful start,” she said. “Can you elaborate?”
“Someone acted very rude towards me the other night when I was having dinner with a friend from college,” you said. “And I was annoyed at how inconsiderate it was to pull that shit when I was in the middle of something. Like what, you couldn’t wait an hour or so to do this on my way back home?”
“How did you react when it happened?”
“I didn’t get to react much because Bucky placed himself in that situation as well.”
“He was there?”
“Passing by,” you spat, “Anyway, he got involved and the situation was resolved pretty fast.”
“In disagreements like these,” she said. “It’s incredibly important that we make our stance and boundaries clear.”
You pursed your lips. “I don’t disagree.”
“So this inconsiderate person you speak of, would you say they know how you feel about the issue?”
You repressed a smile, then leaned back, crossing your legs.
“I think so,” you said. “I expressed very clearly how I felt about the issue and now, well…I’m very certain that they won’t do it again.”
*
Normally you didn’t mind these dinners mainly because you and Becca would have a lot of fun once the dinner was over. George and Winnifred had always been nice to you and Winnifred had more than once said you were family, seeing that you and Becca were inseparable even when you were little.
And you were hoping Bucky would be busy the whole night so you wouldn’t have to spend the night delivering snarks back and forth.
Ian sipped his wine while you texted Becca under the table, complaining about how she should have been there for the hundredth time since the morning before you lifted your glances from the phone.
“Becca gives her regards, everyone.”
“Oh thank you sweetheart,” your father said. “Will she not be joining us then?”
“There’s apparently her friend’s bachelorette party?” Winnifred asked, turning to you as if she wanted to be sure and you nodded.
“Her friend’s sister’s bachelorette,” you said helpfully and George smiled slightly.
“And when will we see your bachelorette, sweetheart?”
“George!”
“Not soon I hope,” your father said with a chuckle and you waved a hand in the air.
“Definitely not soon,” you said and Ian played with his fork.
“I don’t know,” he said with a scoff. “You keep dating civilians, one of them will ask you to marry them sooner or later.”
Your head snapped up and a silence fell upon the table. George and Winnifred exchanged glances and your father raised his brows.
“Y/N?”
You narrowed your eyes. “Ian doesn’t know what he’s talking about as always.”
“Oh is that right?”
“Our Y/N is a very beautiful girl,” Winnifred said as if trying to de-escalate the situation. “Civilian or not, I’m not surprised many people are interested.”
You offered her a thankful smile and turned to your father.
“I’m not dating civilians,” you assured him. “Or anyone right now.”
“But you know the rules,” your father said. “Any civilian you decide to date has to go through the background check.”
“With good reason,” George pointed out before taking his fork to his mouth and you hummed.
“Yeah yeah, I remember the whole speech.”
“Bucky and Becca got that speech as well.”
“They apparently needed it,” Winnifred said. “I mean do you remember Bucky’s ex girlfriend? Dot?”
That familiar bitterness of jealousy churned your stomach and you pursed your lips, then reached out for your wine glass.
“Were you here around that time sweetheart?” George asked you. “Or were you still away for college?”
The music was booming through the club as you walked back to the bar from the bathroom with Becca, and you looked around for your date as Becca motioned at the bartender, then turned her head when Steve touched her shoulder.
“Hi there.”
“Hey!” Becca kissed him on the cheek and you smiled at him.
“Hi Steve,” you said, taking your cocktail from the bartender. “Um, did you see my date anywhere?”
Steve shot you an apologetic smile. “I told him not to do it.”
Becca sucked on the straw of the cocktail, raising her brows and you frowned.
“What?”
“Bucky.”
Your jaw clenched and you gritted your teeth, putting your drink down.
“Where is he?”
“I just want to remind you that Sam has just bought this club, so he’d be pretty angry if you shot my brother tonight.” Becca pointed out, leaning sideways to Steve’s arm and Steve nodded his head.
“Wouldn’t look good for the club.”
“Where is he, Steve?”
Steve pointed upstairs. “VIP.”
You whirled around on your heels and stomped your way up the cantilever stairs, anger rushing through you. You made your way past his and Sam’s bodyguards by the door, then slammed the door open to step inside. Bucky was talking to Sam as you walked in while a gorgeous girl resting her head on his shoulder and Sam hissed in a breath.
“Uh oh,” he said. “Told you not to do it.”
“Hi Sam.”
“Hi Y/N.”
The girl lifted her head from Bucky’s shoulder as Bucky sat up straighter, and had the nerve to smile at you.
“Hi Charm.”
“Where is my date, Bucky?”
“I think he said he had something to do,” Bucky said, stealing a look at Sam. “Something urgent, right Sam? That’s what we heard.”
“Oh you’re not dragging me into this.”
“I’m sorry, who is this?” the girl asked and Bucky cleared his throat, then motioned between you and her.
“Y/N, this is Dot; my girlfriend.”
Your eyes snapped up to his, that familiar bitterness climbing up your throat but you managed to keep your expression flat.
“Dot, this is Y/N. She’s uh…she’s Becca’s best friend.”
Sam tilted his head to shoot Bucky a look of disbelief.
“You’ve just intimidated Becca’s best friend’s date into leaving the club?” Dot asked, confusion laced in her tone and Sam cleared his throat.
“They grew up together,” he explained to her. “Bucky tends to get overprotective of Y/N, kind of an old habit there.”
Dot pressed a hand on her chest.
“Aw that’s sweet!” she said. “So she’s like a sister to you, Bucky?”
Sam raised his brows as if trying to keep a straight face, then he shook his head slightly while you glared at Bucky.
“Well—” Bucky started but you cut him off.
“What did you say to him?”
“Nothing,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. “Just a warning. Don’t blame me if you keep dating people who are easily intimidated.”
“Who I date is none of your business.”
“You are Becca’s best friend so it makes it my business—also, you call that dancing?” he asked you. “He was feeling you up, he should be glad he walked out of here with his junk still attached to his body.”
You ran a hand over your face, then turned to Dot.
“Listen, I don’t even know you but you seem nice enough,” you said. “You probably deserve better than an asshole who thinks his dick is made of gold. You could do much better.”
With that, you walked out of the room and slammed the door behind you.
“No, they got together after I returned to the city,” you said. “Like a month after my graduation. I was here, she was pretty nice.”
“I didn’t like her,” Winnifred said and you let out a small laugh.
“And when was the last time you liked anyone he or Becca brought home?”
“When was the last time either of them brought someone I could like?” Winnifred asked back and you held up your hands with a grin, gesturing surrender.
“Daddy is the same,” you said. “But don’t worry, just in case things get serious with a partner, me and Becca came up with a great plan years ago.”
“What is it?”
“We’ll get everyone drunk,” you pointed out, coaxing chuckles out of them. “Should make things easier, at least for the first dinner.”
*
After dinner, you had excused yourself to go up to the swimming pool on the rooftop, so that you could enjoy the night. After their weekend house, this one was the one you liked the most among Barnes residences; it had such a lovely view of the night sky. You sipped your wine and leaned back on the lounge chair, heaving a sigh and keeping your eyes on the stars.
Becca was still partying with her friends so you were just going to enjoy some peace and quiet until it was time to go home. You loved spending time with George and Winnifred, that wasn’t the problem, but this evening you really weren’t in the mood for Ian’s bullshit. You knew very well that he knew about your date with Ethan, and though he hadn’t told your father yet, you were sure it wasn’t from the goodness in his heart.
Not that he or your father had anything to worry about. You had made sure that Ethan got a background check as your father wanted with all the civilians you dated, back at college and right before you decided to meet again two weeks back, you had done the same. It was safe, whether they approved him or not.
The sound of the door opening made you turn your head and as soon as your eyes fell upon Bucky stepping to the roof, you let out a groan.
“I thought you were busy.”
“I was,” he said, approaching you with a glass of whiskey in his hand before he sat down on the lounge chair beside yours and you stole a look at him.
“You missed dinner.”
“Mm hm. Sorry about that.”
“You never miss dinner.”
“Yeah well, wasn’t exactly my choice,” he said, making you turn a little so that you can look at him better.
“Why?”
“Overtime at the office,” he joked and you tilted your head.
“Trouble?”
“Nothing we can’t handle.”
“Does my father know?”
“He does,” he said as your phone vibrated on the small table beside you, making you check the screen.
From: Ethan
My coworkers dragged me to this café and I think you’d like it.
You smiled slightly and typed back your reply.
Well, the only way to be sure is if you invite me there the next time.
It didn’t even take him five seconds to reply back;
Lunch tomorrow?
You typed in a “Yes” and sent it, then turned the phone in your hand while Bucky lit a cigarette.
“Is that the civilian?”
“Ugh, not you too!” you whined with a grimace. “Everyone already gave me the third degree at dinner, you’d think I’m going to elope at any time.”
He shot you a light hearted glare. “They’re just worried about you sweetheart.”
“Don’t call me that—and also, you’ve dated one hundred civilians, I don’t see anyone giving you speeches,” you grumbled. “It’s so hypocritical, not to mention medieval.”
Bucky chuckled, then sipped his drink.
“Well…”
“I don’t know why everyone keeps acting like the possibility of me ending up with a civilian would be a disaster.”
“Because it would be.”
“No, you know what the disaster would be?” you asked him. “Me ending up with someone from the business.”
“Oh come on—”
“Pop out a few babies, pretend I don’t know about his mistresses and go to pilates for the rest of my life,” you mused. “Dream life right there.”
“It doesn’t have to be like that and you know that,” Bucky said. “Only an idiot would cheat on you, and in case it has escaped your notice, idiots don’t live long in this line of work.”
You suppressed a smile threatening to warm your face, and instead rolled your eyes at him.
“Not worth the effort,” you said as you downed your wine, then held out your glass in his direction. The corners of his mouth twitched upwards but he still grabbed the wine bottle on the floor to fill your glass.
“Thank you.”
“As the princess wishes,” he said and you heaved a sigh, then leaned back again to look up at the sky.
“What’s going on with the business?” you asked. “Are you and Stark still on bad terms?”
“We’re playing nice,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. “Common interests for once.”
“I’ll pop the champagne,” you deadpanned. “He looks pretty busy; he and my father have a meeting next week as well.”
“Will Ian be there?”
You heaved a sigh. “I’d assume so.”
Bucky ran a hand over his face, then turned to you.
“Your father is not serious, is he?” he asked you. “He’s not actually going to name Ian as his successor?”
That familiar bitter taste burned your mouth but you pursed your lips together, then slipped a little on the lounge chair.
“Why are you asking me?” you asked. “Go ask him that.”
“I’m not going to do business with Ian, Charm.” Bucky told you. “If your father retires and names him the successor, that’s it.”
Your jaw dropped as you gawked at him.
“You cannot be serious,” you said. “Just because you don’t like him—”
“It’s not just that,” Bucky said. “Stark and I hate each other’s guts, but I still know he’s not going to break the truce or stab me in the back. Ian, on the other hand…”
“Ian is insufferable,” you said. “Trust me I’d know, I live with the guy. But breaking the truce is a death sentence, and he’s not an idiot.”
“I don’t trust him,” Bucky said. “Neither does Steve, or Sam.”
You massaged your temples with your fingertips. “Don’t put me in a position where I have to speak well of Ian.”
“You couldn't speak well of him if you tried,” he insisted before he took a sip of his whiskey. “Listen, I get why your father made the decision he made after your mother, but that was then. You can’t tell me you’re okay with this.”
You bit inside your cheek, swirling the wine in your glass.
“He promised it to me, Bucky,” you said through your teeth, your gaze fixed on your wine. “All those years ago. I was playing with dolls in the car and and my father pointed outside and told me that part of the city would belong to me when I grew up. So no, of course I’m not okay with the possibility of Ian being the successor.”
“Then take over.”
A small laugh climbed up your throat and you nodded at his whiskey glass. “How many of those have you had?”
“You know me better than that, I’m completely sober,” he said. “Why wouldn’t you take over?”
“Don’t you remember what went down in Massachusetts years ago?” you asked. “That family fight for the crown? They almost brought the whole city down with them, alliances got fucked, so many people died...”
“That was very different, there was no truce there.”
You clicked your tongue. “Still. It would devastate my father if I started a war in the family.”
“Ian is going to burn your father’s empire down,” Bucky told you, his piercing blue eyes locked in yours, making your heart skip a beat. “You think it won’t devastate him to watch that? If you want to be the next leader—”
“Of course I want it,” you cut him off, your whole body tense. “What I want changes nothing here.”
“Charm…”
“My father made sure I stayed out of the business since my mom,” you said. “Which was good strategy on his part, I admit. Ian on the other hand has many friends in the business and they’re completely loyal to him. He would not just hand that position to me, not when he thinks my father will name him as the successor instead of me.”
“He has his men, so what?” he asked you. “Compared to the support you would have if you wanted the crown? You have more allies than Ian.”
You blinked a couple of times, a small glimmer of hope warming your chest before you cleared your throat.
“There’s the code,” you muttered. “It’s family business. No one outside the family can get involved in the decision of who the next leader should be.”
A small smile pulled at his lips and for the thousandth time you couldn’t help but notice how handsome he was, but then you frowned down at your wine glass and put it on the small table, rolling your shoulders back.
Yeah. Enough wine for the night.
“But a powerful ally in the family would make everything much easier, wouldn’t it?” he asked and you scoffed a laugh.
“My hypothetical rise to power?” you asked. “Obviously. But either way, it’d be an uphill battle. What with the city and family and everything…”
“It doesn’t have to be,” he said without pulling his gaze off you and you felt your cheeks burn under his intense stare, but managed to keep your expression completely nonchalant.
“No?”
“Not at all.”
“And how’s that?”
Bucky swallowed thickly and downed his whiskey in one go before straightening his back. If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought he was nervous but of course that was nonsense; Bucky was too arrogant to be nervous.
“Come on,” you taunted him. “Humor me, golden heir.”
“Well,” he said after a pause, turning his empty glass in his hand. “You have a point. You would have to get most of Ian’s supporters within the family, you would have to persuade your father, and considering Ian will not want to hand you the crown, that whole process would not go very peacefully. Me, Steve and Sam already support you, but the rest of the families could take some time and effort to convince. I guess some bloodshed in the city would be inevitable as well, it’d be a huge change, considering your father’s influence and power…”
You hummed. “Or?”
A smile curled his lips upwards and he took a deep breath.
“Or,” he said. “You could marry me.”
Chapter 5
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#mob!bucky barnes#mob!bucky#mob!bucky barnes x reader#mob!bucky x reader#mob boss!bucky#mob bucky x reader#mob boss bucky barnes#bucky x reader#mafia bucky x reader#mafia!bucky barnes#mafia!bucky#mob au#mob! bucky#mob bucky#mob bucky barnes x reader#mob!au
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Hello :3
Happy Path to Nowhere 2nd Anniversary! I was watching the stream and the last part, the cat animation, made my heart melt so I wanted to request something! Could you perhaps write a little story where like the plot line of the whole surprise the Chief thing happens with female Chief? The last scene with the three, Chief, Hella, and Hecate, made me scream from cuteness overload and had to muffle it since it’s midnight where I live. 😭
I wish they had the morning call in the Chinese stream too, but a simp could only wish. Or did I miss that part? Was trying to find Angell’s morning call in Chinese since I’m a simp and since I primarily use Chinese voice acting for most of my games.
Happy gaming and love your blogs ❤️
I missed the stream cause it happened at like 7 am here but I went and saw the recording after seeing your request, the cat animation melted me oh my god it was so fcking cute sjdfhiofhewoifh 😭❤️
Unfortunately idk much about the CN stream, I saw the jp stream later just to see the morning calls and it wasn't there so I saw the VA talks and they had Langley and Hecate other than the 3 new Sinners. Similar to you, I'm a simp for the jp voices haha I play every gacha in jp vo
Thank you for the request tho I decided to do it asap so as to coincide with the anni. Happy 2nd anniversary to all my ptn people here!! ❤️
Characters: Various x fem!reader (Chief) [platonic for Hella, Hecate and other teen/children Sinners]
Type: SFW, Fluff (there is a surprise scene which wasn't in the official video, that's why this is even romantic at all~)
It was a normal day at the MBCC with everyone going about their duties and daily life. But the usual calm was interrupted when Nightingale walked inside the recreational area and asked the Sinners to gather around for an announcement. The ordeal was strange since all announcements were normally made through the speaker and only specified Sinners would be called in for special tasks. Nightingale chose the perfect time she knew everyone would be here so as to involve everyone, and still asked for any absentees to be called.
"Ahem, thank you everyone for heeding to my request. I will get to the point right away. Some may or may not know, next Saturday is Chief's second year in office. It has been a long and hard journey for Chief since her awakening, she has achieved lifelong milestones and made DisCity a safer place for everyone, especially all of you. To show our gratitude and appreciation, we will be holding a celebration for her. So, I'm here to ask you all if there is something you'd like to do for her. I'm sure she'd be very happy to receive something from you."
Everyone immediately perked up with excitement and interest hearing the announcement, some whispers and talks already beginning to form.
"Yes yes! I have a proposal!" Hella raised her hand and came forward, beaming with energy. Her proposal was simple enough, organizing a party with everyone's contribution in something or the other. None of the Sinners had any reason to refuse hence the proposal was quickly accepted and work began soon after. Eirene, Langley and Zoya were appointed as the co-leaders with Hella and Hecate (mostly Hella) leading the whole thing, it was fun for her to order everyone around but they all knew she was simply too excited and wanted everything done perfectly.
Different groups were formed and each given a set of duties. By the end of their planning phase, everyone had a work to do no matter how small or big. The incoming days felt like a hurricane with how busy everyone was and also had to keep the party a surprise, it was difficult to keep it a secret considering how involved you were with the bureau's affairs and caught on to many suspicious things that were being brought in and out. Still, eventually they had prevented any big revelations and kept you sufficiently intrigued.
"Oi, why is the banner not up yet?! We only have 4 hours left!"
Hella shouted, calling EMP and Horo to get on with the work. It was early Saturday morning, the day of the celebration. Fortunately, all necessary props had arrived thanks to Eirene's connections and authority in Eastside, the only thing left was to decorate the venue and make a cake. Cabernet had proposed to call the best pastry chef in DisCity for the cake but Chameleon and a few others suggested to make it themselves so as to make it more special.
Almost everyone participated in the cake making, right from bringing the ingredients to giving a hand in the making process and decorating it. The flavor was decided to be your favorite one and a signature topping was chosen for everyone to show their love for you. However, most didn't anticipate how chaotic the kitchen would become for making a simple cake. There were too many clashing opinions on the choice of frosting, shape, layers etc.
In the end, Nightingale had to step in and sort out the mess by proposing a common ground- 3 layered chocolate cake with vanilla frosting topped with strawberry pieces and chocolate puree around the edges, accompanied with 1 piece of signature topping by everyone. They beamed with pride looking at the finished cake and decorated venue, now all that was left was calling the special guest.
"Good work, everyone! Thank you for cooperating, we have 1 hour until the party so everyone can get ready till then and prepare anything else if they'd like. I'll bring Chief over later." Nightingale announced and some Sinners dispersed away to their cells to get dressed while others went to the cafeteria to have a break after the grueling preparations.
Hecate and Hella were seated together in the cafeteria. Hecate noticed Hella's cheerful demeanour and overall excitement about the event, finding her state quite interesting.
"Hella, why are you doing this?" Hecate suddenly asked.
"Hm? What do you mean?"
"This party.... why are you doing it?"
"H-Huh? Isn't it obvious....?!"
Hecate tilted her head, "Is it?"
Hella looked at her in bewilderment then sighed, "Don't you think she deserves it after all that she has done? It's exactly what Nightingale said when she announced it."
Hecate looked down with a blank expression, "I don't understand it too well. But, if it's like what Chief says to me about resting and taking things easy then...."
"Mm, that's a good enough explanation."
"But I still don't understand why you took charge of this. I didn't think you were the type to do something like this."
Hella looked almost offended and scoffed, "What do you take me for?! Of course, I understand her struggle and hard work for us. Is it so wrong to want to pay her back?"
Hecate pondered for a moment and noticed Hella's pout and slightly reddened face then gave a faint smile, "I think I get it now. I hope she likes it."
Hella grinned, "Of course, she will! My choices are the best!"
They smiled at each other before continuing their own work. It was now time for the celebration to begin as Nightingale made her way over to your office. She gently knocked on the door and stepped in to see you swamped with work as usual, likely not even realizing it was your work anniversary.
"Chief, you are required in the recreational area for a bit."
"Oh, is something wrong?"
"Yes, the Sinners are facing some issues. They'd like you to come and resolve it."
You nodded and wasted no time to get up to go. Nightingale always admired your work ethics and dedication towards the Sinners' wellbeing, she really wanted today to be a day for you to feel appreciated for all your efforts. You were walking through the corridor when you noticed everything was quieter and empty than usual, the guards seemed to be missing and barely any noise came from all around.
You reached the recreational area and tried to listen to any sounds considering there should be a ruckus but everything was too quiet. You looked over at Nightingale silently standing behind you with her usual expression then sighed and opened the door. All of a sudden, you were blinded by bright lights causing you to squint your eyes followed by the sound of each and every Sinner speaking their greetings for you.
"Happy 2nd year in office, Chief!~"
When you finally opened your eyes, you saw all the Sinners gathered around in front of you. In the frontmost row were Hella, Hecate, Zoya, Coquelic and Shalom all holding a big cake in their hands. Your mind couldn't comprehend the situation and you took a moment to look around the area until finally realizing what was happening.
"2nd year in office....?" you questioned then looked at Nightingale who was now on your left, standing with everyone with a smile on her face.
"Yes, Chief. Today is the day you were awakened and took charge of the bureau 2 years go."
You suddenly remembered the date and realized it was true, how could you forget the day your life changed forever? You then looked back at the Sinners and became slightly flustered seeing all the preparations they made, especially the beautiful and cute cake right in front of you.
"Hurry up and cut it, Chief! We can't wait to have it!" EMP shouted from behind Hella, making everyone chuckle.
"Thank you everyone, this is.... I-I don't have any words actually, I feel really happy. You all didn't need to do this, really...." you mumbled.
"Hmm, don't be so humble now, Chief~" Coquelic hummed.
"Hehe, indeed. Everyone contributed in this, you should thank their efforts~" Shalom added.
You smiled brightly at everyone then blew the candles and finally cut the cake. Kelvin and Ignis stepped forward to distribute slices to everyone while you were taken inside to sit at a sofa and served some snacks and beverages. All the Sinners formed groups around you and an atmosphere of laughter and celebration commenced. Some time passed and you were chatting with Langley when the sound of plate breaking was heard from across the room.
"A-Ah I'm so sorry, Hella!" EMP desperately apologized to Hella who was currently on the floor, her face covered with pieces of the cake and the plate shattered beside her. It seemed EMP accidentally bumped into Hella and made her fall which caused the cake to stain all over her face. Hella looked at EMP with rage and embarrassment as everyone stared at her, some even laughing at the ordeal though nobody meant any harm.
Hecate was the one to come forward and offer a tissue to wipe the cake from Hella's face and helped her stand up while Kelvin hurriedly gathered the broken pieces of the plate. You looked at the commotion and quickly made your way over to see Hella snuggled into Hecate's shoulder with tears in her eyes. EMP ran away before you could scold her, you decided to instead comfort Hella. You walked up to them and patted Hella's head, making her look at you.
"Are you okay, Hella? You can have some of my cake instead, and there is still more left that you can have."
You spoke with a smile and Hella sniffled her tears, you then patted Hecate's head too.
"Good job helping her, Hecate."
Hecate felt all warm and fuzzy inside hearing the compliment and simply nodded her head. You had both of them sit on the sofa and brought a new slice of cake then offered a bite to Hella who reluctantly accepted it, deep down you knew she loved this kind of attention.
"T-Thank you, Hecate and idiot Chief...." Hella mumbled, making you softly chuckle and pat her head more.
The sight of you three sitting together this way was quite adorable for some Sinners, giving them the image of a small and loving family with you as the mother of them. Some Sinners couldn't help but feel quite attracted to you, not that they already weren't, but seeing you act like a parent gave them.... fantasies.
"Oh, Chief, she's always so.... aaah, I want her even more now!~" Garofano pondered in a lovey-dovey haze.
"Oh, to have her feed me that way.... And perhaps I'll feed on her too, hehe~" Cabernet pondered, licking her lips.
Such similar thoughts roamed in every woman's head who liked you a bit more than usual, a kind of feeling they'd usually hide but felt overwhelmed by now. The celebration eventually ended by evening and you decided to go to your room to take a nap before continuing with paperwork. You had barely reached your room and begun to change your clothes when a huge commotion occured outside and you went to see what was happening, only to be met by the sight of various Sinners gathered around and arguing over something.
"Hey hey, everyone, what's the matter?" you cautiously asked and tried to calm them down.
"Hmph, always so pretentious in your approach, Hush. Don't forget the MBCC is under my jurisdiction." Langley stately claimed to Shalom who smirked in response.
"You can keep the MBCC under you, everyone knows Chief will be under me~" Shalom retorted.
"How many times have you tried to bribe her, Countess?~" Eirene mocked Chelsea.
"Oh, more than enought times than you have played chess with her, Quinn~" Chelsea retorted.
Everyone seemed to be engaged in some kind of banter with each other and completely ignored your intervention, making you confused and nervous about what the issue was. Coquelic was the first one to act differently. She had been silently standing on the side with Garofano and Sumire behind her and waiting for her turn but seeing the unnecessary trouble, she decided to take matters in her own hands. Her small frame made it easier for her to squeeze in through the crowd and stand in front of you with a sly smirk.
"Ah, Coquelic! What's happen—?!"
Your words were blocked as she suddenly pulled you down near her face by grabbing your chest harness then placed a supple kiss on the left corner of your lips, hard enough to leave a mark of her red lipstick. Everyone instantly became quiet seeing her bold action, some even gasping in surprise.
"Everyone was wasting so much time debating over who'll go first so I took the initiative. You are welcome to come to my room if you want more, Chief~"
Coquelic declared before waving at everybody and walking away, leaving you quite dumbfounded at what just happened. You then looked at everyone else and knew you were in trouble, probably the best kind of trouble, though. As if like dam broke down, everyone lunged at you and pushed you inside your room until you were seated on the edge of the bed and had them hover around you, some even climbing up and going behind you while the rest fought to have space in front.
"Everyone, calm down! Let's do one at a time, okay?!" you proposed a solution but it didn't seem like they were keen on listening.
Garofano and Sumire were first to act following their mentor's steps and placed a kiss on each of your cheeks, leaving a lipstick mark just like Coquelic did. This was followed by Chelsea and Lady Pearl, the latter of them kissing your jaw and the former kissing your forehead, again leaving lipstick marks. Next was Cabernet who acted swiftly to be alone and wasted no chance to kiss your lips, pulling away with a lick and imprinting her lipstick too.
"Hehe, you taste so good, Chief~" Cabernet remarked before being pulled away by Eirene who straddled your lap and held your face to kiss the right corner of your lips, similar to Coquelic's action and also leaving her lipstick mark.
"I'll take more from you later, Chief~" Eirene said with a smirk then got off you and made space for Langley and Chamelon who sat on each side of the bed beside you and examined your face, seemingly finding an empty space for them to make their mark.
"You look adorable, Chief. But you should have left some space for me~" Chameleon teased while sliding her hand down your neck and unbuttoning the first button of your shirt.
"Hmph, such behaviour is intolerable from you, rookie. I expect you in my office later to compensate for this~" Langley stated.
Both of them dived near your exposed neck and kissed on either side, a muffled moan leaving your lips at the overwhelming contact. Just like everyone, their lipsticks were also imprinted on your skin distinctly. Shalom came in next and surprisingly, brought Nightingale along with her who was seemingly standing outside the whole time and watching the ordeal. You could tell Nightingale was clearly embarrassed and reluctant to follow through with her desires, but you pulled her in by her arm to tell her it was okay.
"Oh my, aren't you quite bold with your Adjutant?~" Shalom teased.
Nightingale was too embarrassed to kiss you anywhere other than your forehead, while Shalom kissed near your ear, her breath brushing past making you shudder. Your body was heaving by now with all the sensations you were experiencing, but you could still see more were left. Oak Casket and Raven soon got their turns, the former kissing your hand while the latter kissed your chin. By now, it was difficult to tell who kissed where, but they all knew their special spot.
Some of the last few people were Anne, Serpent, Angell, Bai Yi, Cassia and Eleven- all of them kissing at different spots on your face and neck and leaving their lipstick marks too. At last when it all ended, you practically plopped on the bed with exhaustion and caressed all the kiss marks with your fingers before smiling to yourself and closing your eyes. You were surprised they didn't just tear away your clothes and mark you all over.... perhaps that was saved for some other day.
#path to nowhere#ptn#path to nowhere x reader#ptn x reader#ptn 2nd anniversary!#various x reader#chameleon x reader#cabernet x reader#eirene x reader#langley x reader#lady pearl x reader#coquelic x reader#shalom x reader#countess chelsea x reader#nightingale x reader#anne x reader#garofano x reader#sumire x reader#there's more but im lazy to tag#you get the idea
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If a version of Midnight Sun existed for each following instalment of the Twilight series (New Moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn), what do you think they’d be called/what would you call them and what (new) scenes would be in them?
Anon, you speak my greatest dream. I want this in my life. If no one else does, then I am the sole person who does. If there is not one person who wants this, it means that I have died.
I need this.
But for now, I can only imagine (and no doubt fail miserably to what it would be in actuality).
New Moon
The thing is that Meyer would also want to call this New Moon for the reason that she called it New Moon for Bella: this is a book about hopelessness. Edward leaves, Bella's soulmate, she literally cannot survive without him and this book is her discovering "oh, yeah, I literally cannot survive without him" (and making friends with Jacob but let's be real Meyer was never that into that).
It's a book where the moon, the light, is gone.
For Edward, we have the same narrative, he tries to leave Bella for her own good, fails, has a miserable time, and comes crawling back only to find that he's made everything worse.
But because Edward is more dramatic, and to thematically work with Midnight Sun (named thus as Bella is the unexpected sunlight in what should be the darkest of Edward's nights) we have Polar Night which is the phenomenon opposite of Midnight Sun where instead of the sun never setting at all we have the night never ending.
As for what would be in it. My friend, my beautiful friend, everything would be in it.
We'd get the scene where Edward bullies his family into leaving, many of them having reservations, and then steals all Bella's photographs and tries and fails to steal the stereo out of her car. We'd get scenes of Edward fantasizing about Bella marrying and holding hands with MiKe NEWtoN and it being entirely too much for him. We get all of the birthday party, period, which from Edward's point of view would no doubt be insane.
We have Edward so fucking depressed that he feels he's bringing the family down and chooses to leave on the vague pretext of catching Victoria. Then he doesn't catch Victoria and loses her in Mexico but is so depressed he just keeps going south until he hits Brazil.
Where he stays, and per what he says to Bella (which is undoubtedly not the entire truth) he was fucking miserable and did nothing for months. Did he have a Hallucination Bella who told him not to eat human food because it'd make him sick? Did he write a rock opera about Bella Swan only to realize it didn't live up to real life and burn it in a fit of despair and anger? What about the family calling to check in? We know that happened, Rosalie could reach Edward and he answered, so did they just call and quietly try to ask if Edward's coming back home or not? You know? Anytime? Edward?
And then of course his pleading for death with the Volturi, being told no, planning his elaborate massacre-suicide before settling on good old suicide without any murder and Bella being alive and that whole debacle from his point of view including "OH NO OTHER MAN MOVED IN" when he realizes Jacob's... kind of... a thing...
Everything would be new in part because we see so little of Edward and given the insanity in Midnight Sun that was never in Twilight I can't even guess to what Edward got up to for months in Rio.
It could be fucking anything.
Eclipse
Or "Edward did a bad thing and is now very nervous" the novel. As for what it's call, this is less clear as we have to go with the sun/moon themes here, and Eclipse is already taken. If we're allowed weather related events maybe "Eye of the Hurricane" as there's a storm out there and this book is about Edward barely holding his shit together. This is his nightmare scenario in every way.
Bella has a new love interest, a friend she believes is platonic who is very interested in her, and worse, Edward actually does admire and is hands down in Edward's opinion the better man for her to be with. Bella's changed when he was gone and is now an adrenaline junky, what else about her has changed? How much did he miss? She's involved in werewolves who all hate Edward, for good reason, and want her to leave him, for good reason. Edward has discovered that he actually can't leave Bella, Alice was right, even though he wants to be that strong desperately. Bella got the family to agree to turn her and they'll do it, Edward's barely gotten her to agree to be turned by him instead, but she's hemming and hawing about marrying and committing to him and she wants him to bang him (which will likely lead to her death)
Edward is straight up not having a good time, bro.
So, we'd get Edward's insane plans to keep Bella and Jacob apart, his meeting Bella in the road after her looking like he'd love nothing more than to pull The Terminator where he chases her car down. We get Edward's increasing nervousness that Bella "wants to be with him forever" but "doesn't want to marry him" (which for Edward, understandably as he doesn't have Bella's background, is something that just doesn't compute). And there's Jacob, kissing Bella, warming her up at night, thinking very dirty things when Edward's sitting right there internally screaming.
And of course, offscreen things with the family, likely venting about the Denali who are leaving them to die because they won't let them kill the children Native Americans, wondering if they're all going to die in this fight, even more of the tent scene with Jacob (which I'm sure, somehow, I'm sure, got very homoerotic in there). Probably sobbing to Alice "I fucked up" and then hating Rosalie BECAUSE THIS IS ALL HER FAULT HISS HISS.
And of course, what we know he sees from Bree and perhaps the discussion with the family that Bella never got to be privy to.
And I imagine a lot of fantasies of Bella pregnant with Jacob's beautiful babies.
Breaking Dawn
I'm going to bow out for this one too, Meyer would want to name it that. Maybe we get "Hailey's Comet" or something, in that Edward has related Bella to a comet streaking across the bleak sky of his life and this is him learning to accept to be happy and perhaps good things are allowed to happen to him.
But anyways.
I mean.
We get Breaking Dawn.
We get Edward gearing himself up for sex and asking the family how to bang a woman. We know he did this. Canonically he confesses to Bella, in the weirdest manner possible, that he asked his entire family how to do it (and it made it clear that Carlisle didn't really approve and was pretty :/ and "don't do it" about all of it). We get the family probably watching Alice like hawks because they're waiting for her to tell them if Bella lived or died through intercourse. We get Edward interrogating the maid in Portuguese and god knows what they even said to one another but it had to be wild.
We get Edward planning Bella's abortion, the betrayal by Rosalie yet again, and then more planning of her forced abortion with Jacob and his opinion on Jacob turning from "respected rival" into "my only friend".
Then we get Edward's complete flip on Renesmee which must have been... I don't even know. But he'd be thinking she's the spawn of Satan before that (in the most Edward manner possible) and then that she's Jesus after that (in the most Edward manner possible).
Then of course there's "my son, Jacob" and honestly probably fantasizing about an adult Renesmee pregnant with Jacob's beautiful babies. Let's be real here. and just...
Look.
I can't predict this.
What we saw of Breaking Dawn was already insane and this would only be more so because it's Edward. There's so much we don't see as Bella pays 0 attention to the other vampires and to the family at large and Edward would just...
I have no idea.
It would just be madness.
TL;DR
I need this.
#twilight#twilight meta#twilight headcanon#twilight renaissance#edward cullen#anti edward cullen#meta#headcanon#opinion
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“Approaching storm”
Morticia: Good morning, Wednesday. Are your friends awake?
Wednesday: no. Enid always sleeps until the last minute. Pressing snooze on her alarm until she sees me dressed ready to leave the room and then proceeds to scream at me for not waking her up. If I do try to wake up she screams at me for waking her up.
Eugene: -yawning- Good morning, Mrs Addams. Morning, Wednesday
Morticia: please, Eugene. Call me Morticia. Did you sleep well?
Eugene: I did. Oh my god! I- I-is that a Lion?
Wednesday: it just Kitty Kat. - there was someone behind the Lion trying to be sneaky- UNCLE FESTER!!
Morticia smiled at her brother. Wednesday happily leaped into his arms. Eugene was stunning at Wednesday’s emotional outburst
Wednesday: you made it!!
Fester: wouldn’t miss it for the world, Kiddo. Morticia says you have a big announcement. Has that fella I saw you with in the Nightshade library proposed?
Wednesday: ugh no. I am not interested in him. I have a girlfriend.
Fester: a girlfriend you say?
Wednesday: yes. Enid Sinclair. My roommate. You will officially meet her when she wakes up. This is Eugene. The beekeeper and my friend. Eugene, this is my Uncle Fester
Eugene: nice to meet you, sir -extending his hand only to get a slight electric shock shaking the bald man’s hand
Fester: -seeing a sleepy colorful blonde enter- You must be Enid. How you snagged Wednesday is beyond me but Welcome.
Enid was engulfed in a big hug
Gomez: Fester! You fiend. You made it. Lurch has gone to the airport for Cousin Itt and his family. They managed to make it out before the storm
Fester: ahh yes. Hurricane Mortimer. I was tempted to travel there to witness all the stranded tourists. It is always quite the sight. The storm has picked up intensity pretty quickly
Eugene snickered
Fester: what is so funny?
Enid: oh We have an an school mate out there! Wednesday? Do you still have the phone Xavier gave you? Does it even still work?
Wednesday: I do. It works. Why?
Eugene: you should text him! Ask if he’s enjoying the beach!
Wednesday smirked
#wednesday addams#enid sinclair#enid x wednesday#wenclair#wednsday addams#enid and wednesday#wednesday x enid#fester addams#eugene ottinger#morticia and gomez#mortica addams#gomez addams#xavier thorpe
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Fic Commissions for Hurricane Relief
Hi friends! So, I've never done anything like this before, but I've seen plenty of fic writers/artists on Tumblr and beyond offer commissions and prompt-fills as a fundraising venture. Maybe no one will be interested, and that's totally fine! But if you've enjoyed any of my fics in the past and have (literally) a dollar to spare, I invite you to keep reading. :)
If you're not from the United States like I am, you might not have heard as much about it, but the southeastern U.S. was just hit with the deadliest mainland hurricane since Hurricane Katrina in 2005.
Given the recent devastation caused by Hurricane Helene, I wanted to offer up my own fic-writing abilities for the cause. I personally donated to BeLoved Asheville, a local 501(c)(3) non-profit which was recommended to me by @carolinawrenn, a member of the fandom who's been personally affected by the Hurricane (e.g., literally has no running water at the moment, just like many thousands of others in the region). The American Red Cross is also taking donations for Hurricane Helene relief specifically.
If you're looking for a way to help out and receive some sweet sweet kanej content at the same time, here's what I'm proposing:
If you email me a receipt of your donation to BeLoved Asheville or the Red Cross, I'll write a Six of Crows drabble or fic of your choosing with the following minimum lengths (all dollar amounts in USD - I am happy to look up the conversion rates if you donate in another currency though, and I would round up to the nearest dollar in that case):
$1-5 donation: 100-word drabble
$6-20 donation: 500-word ficlet
$21-50 donation: 1,000-word fic
$51-99 donation: 2,000-word fic
$100+ donation: 3,000-word (or longer, who knows?) fic
If you've read any of my fics, you know that I primarily write kanej, but I'm willing to try my hand at any of the canon ships (e.g., wesper or helnik) and/or general, non-romance fic.
Please consider donating! I would be THRILLED if I got a bunch of $1 donations and had to write a bunch of 100-word drabbles. Every little bit counts. <3
If you're interested in participating, please submit to this form: https://forms.gle/kDG16K2Gr1TBEQFx6
And if you have ANY questions or concerns, feel free to reply below or message/ask me directly. :)
#please please please submit!#I am gaining literally 0$ from this - I have never profited and will never profit from my fics#how very un-Ketterdam of me#my father is NOT profit etc etc#cameliawrites#hurricane helene#hurricane relief#disaster relief#fic commissions#kanej#prompt submissions
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I am very curious about your version of Graves, I want to hear a detailed run down from you on how he’d be like in a romantic situation, would he commit? would he get married? would he “fall in love”, would he want a trophy wife to show off? I am just very curious and would love to hear you speak about this. I want to know what he’d be like if he actually did commit to a long term relationship or marriage, and what kind of woman would make him commit if so? I personally feel like he’d get married to a woman who works alongside him in shadow company, it just makes sense for him to get with somebody who is on the same level of psychopathy as him and understands his actions and behaviour, more so, he’d love being around a woman like that in my opinion. somebody who is as intelligent and knows how PMC’s work and can help him manage it too.
This is a good question! Sorry it took a while work has been absolutely insane. Like 60+ work weeks and now I have Hurricane Beryl headed my way! I use she/her pronouns just because that’s what I wrote my fic about but I think it certainly applies the other way around, too! 😉 I also found out after copy-pasting I've exceeding the character limit so this is part 1! Triggers for mentions of domestic violence and dubcon.
ALSO: This is my version of Graves based on what I know and based on the limited information we have. Another anon post said I had Graves wrong, a different opinion. Totally okay! We all have our own versions of him.
Graves in a romantic situation. This is a difficult one. I think it would be very difficult for Graves to differentiate between romance/love and possessiveness. In a fic I wrote, Graves decides OC is his immediately upon meeting her. I think he would be similarly inclined in the civilian world. I’m not sure if he could a civilian could handle Graves, to be honest ☹But he would be similarly possessive. When this type of man (narcissistic with a touch of psychopathy/sociopathy, and if I’m honest, just a little sadism) is deeply interested in a woman, he gets her one way or another.
My version of Graves likely wouldn’t give his chosen partner a choice. In the military, he’d use his clearances (and his Shadows!) to keep track of her. He’d treat a civilian the same way. He’d follow her and then act like: “Hey! Weird running into you here!” when in his head he’s thinking, “I better not see you talking with any other men.”
I think he would commit/not cheat but not for the reasons normal people would. He would commit because he’s obsessed. He would commit because stalking someone and making sure they don’t escape you once you have a hold of them is like two full-time jobs even with his Shadows. And if we’re talking about a female I can see Graves being worried about said female trying to seduce a Shadow to let her go. If she’s on the smaller side, there’s the risk of her slipping out somewhere. His mobile job would help in the sense that his wife would be clueless as to where she was most of the time. She would never go anywhere alone. He’s got a PMC to run. And when he has down time, he’s tired.
He would love showing off his wife. In a fic I wrote he does just that. He would marry to legally tie his wife to him. And in COD, to make it a legal barrier for her to testify against him. She wouldn’t have a choice. I can totally see him pregnancy trapping his wife to further trap her with him. He’d say there was no way she’d leave and take his children and she’s not going to leave her children behind so she stays. I can’t say him mentioning his kids too much as he realizes they would be a bigger target for his enemies. Even Graves has a bit of a heart when it comes to kids.
I see Graves having more of a traditionalist especially since he’s a conservative type from Texas. I'm a Texan living in Texas y'all: Graves is typical down here (but most of them aren't as good looking!) I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s the type to think: the man works, the wife stays home, raises kids, and spends all her time with her husband when he’s home. However, I can also see him wanting to keep said wife busy so her mind isn’t on escape. After kiddos start entering scene, I see him putting her on intel or something like that. Work from home, ma'am.
Graves would absolutely be attracted to intelligence because Graves is smart. Generally, if there is a big mismatch between intelligence (IQ) between parties, they struggle with not only communication but common interests. I think he would want any children he has to inherit that intelligence and continue his company.
An upside (I guess?): Graves is rich as fuck. His wife would have everything and anything she wants (except freedom, ha).
-OC wants an SUV to transport the kids on base? "Sure, darlin’ I already ordered a top-model Audi/Porche." (By the way, when traveling off base, she and the kids are in a military, armored vehicle with no windows. Graves knows his enemies will try to target them.)
-OC wants to be in a home-like environment on base to give the kids somewhat of a normal life? "Of course, sweetheart. Custom built. Whaddaya want?" (No way they would ever live in a normal neighborhood, too risky.)
-OC asks about schooling since they’re constantly moving around. “Don’t worry about it, love. Paid private school, one-on-one attention online and one-on-one in-person attention in the US. I’m not putting them in the shitty public school system. I want them in military universities.” (Plus, they’d start their military education young.)
I think that Graves, like most full-blood psychopaths/sociopaths as well as those who have a touch of it like Graves, he would equate giving his wife whatever she wanted (except freedom!), any material thing she wanted as well as his kids the best of everything with love. He’d equate sex, even dubcon sex, as love.
Now, more about kids. He’d want the best for his kids but there’s no damn way the kids would get whatever they wanted. He’s got some psychopath in him (see Graves Defragged posts as to why, based on the info we have, he does not score high enough on the psychopathy scale) so he’d literally shape his kids’ (and his wife’s tbh) behavior with positive reinforcement because that is what he responds to. Being a narcissist, he believes everyone thinks like him and that everyone responds to positive reinforcement (but in reality there are other ways of shaping behavior like negative reinforcement, negative punishment, and positive punishment). He literally cannot empathize or put himself in someone else’s shoes (again, see Graves Defragged posts). It’s not that he feels guilt/empathize and chooses to ignore it. This man’s brain is physically wired differently and cannot, cannot, CANNOT feel it. So of course he’d think positive reinforcement is the only way to shape behavior.
Now, Graves’s version of discipline. Yikes. Do I see Graves hitting his partner? Absolutely. Graves is in general not impulsive, especially when it comes to important, long-term decisions. For my Criminal Minds fans, he'd be an organized serial killer, not a disorganized one if that helps. His brain structure is different so his limbic system (the more animalistic part of our brains) can be overwhelming to him and I can see this overtaking his prefrontal lobes (PFC) when emotions are involved. What happens? He will lash out with violence, like, with little warning. (I can write another post as to how most homicides are actually crimes of passion, between people who know each other and not planned out/between strangers like the media/TV shows make it out to be.) He will hit his wife, hard, if she gets (what he deems to be) “out of line.” I can’t really see him doing it all the time. But I can definitely see that if his partner pisses him off enough, that partner can easily spend a few nights in a hospital. Yes, Graves sees his wife as somewhat below him: someone needing guidance, direction, and discipline.
For the kids: He’s the disciplinarian, no doubt and the kids go to mom for comfort. Mom gets in the way? He’ll shove her at the least. I can’t really see him seriously hurting his kids. His kids are half him and he’s narcissistic, remember?
There’s emotion involved and based on what I’ve been trained in, men like Graves can only feel two emotions strongly: joy…and rage. We’ve all gotten angry and done/said something we regretted. Imagine that tenfold with an overactive limbic system and some glitches in the frontal lobes.
Now: In one of my darker fics, Graves writes (and then burns) a letter to OC where he starts to feel some kind of guilt. But, xxavengingangelxx, you said he couldn’t feel that! I know 😉 But we all love somewhat happy endings, right? We all love seeing Graves with somewhat of a human side. That’s why I added that little tidbit even though in real life, he wouldn’t be able to feel that. In my fic he’d continue to blame OC for what she went through because “she should’ve talked when we first got her.”
Wow, ok. Two pages of this. I need to shut up. I went to school for this, I trained in this, I see this every day, and I read on average a book a week on this topic. I’m obsessed fascinated!
Anon, I hope I answered both your questions 😊 Any other questions, let me know!
#phillip graves#cod mw2#phillip graves x reader#graves x reader#cod mwii#cod mw3#mw2 141#criminology#forensic psychology
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something i’d love to see more of is angsty rebellious teenage dick grayson. i don’t know why i enjoy the trope but the image of dick “golden boy” grayson getting plastered with roy as he slowly sinks into depression before somewhat getting his shit together is an interesting picture
also he just seems like the guy to get impulsive piercings. dunno why
oooh yeah that fantasy's a guilty a pleasure of mine.
I am 1000000000% an enforcer of Dick was not an angry robin. And he wasn't because the comics show just how happy his demeanor was and how fun he is. But angsty teen Dick? 16/17 year old Dick?
I LOVE IT.
Again throwing a little bit of canon in
"When we started this you were open and encouraging. You were my father...but these last few years...all you've been doing is trying to control me even more."
This is so loaded.
The anger Dick feels when Bruce is trying control him, trying to lock him in a cage in the batcave because of worry, has so much ao3 potential.
Like angsty teen dick is so complicated to think about because Bruce acts a bit like an alcoholic father and Dick's compartmentalization issues come from his parents' death. So what would this result in?
I have no fcking clue.
Because Dick would totally get wasted with Roy, hazy blue eyes staring emptily into space, watching with a flushed cheeks as his short black hair fans out on the back of a beaten blue couch at Roy's place, just breaking down quietly as Roy rants and screams about life's injustices in the background, slinging an arm around Dick and jostling him.
Or maybe he and Roy would also go bar hopping, both of them sloppy drunk, laughing and crying at the same time while they max out their daddies' credit cards and then crash somewhere in someone's pool. Maybe they end up inadvertently on Katy Perry's Friday Night music video.
Or maybe Dick would be a hurricane of disaster, lashing out with knives of sharpened words stabbing the deepest, sorest spots of pain in people, his anger alighting a fire in all. He would be magnificent, ferocious, and catastrophic.
He could be any of these three and all three at once.
He would feel the need to act out if Bruce was becoming more controlling.
BUT AT THE SAME TIME, Dick raised Bruce and that perpetually sense of responsibility he's instilled into himself from a young age as well as his self-sufficiency is never erased so one night he would be blacked out from the excessive alcohol but next morning 6'o clock his body's walking up and he's going through his morning routine like a machine and out the door to work. He just keeps going like this day and day until he collapses and the titans intervene or Bruce drags him back to the manor, screaming in love and fear and Dick screams back and the cycle begins.
Nightwing (1996) Issue #135
Like canonically Dick ran away from home at 16, got a job, got caught up in a major anarchist group, and did a whole freaking investigation while Bruce sulked in the cave because Dick ran away.
There's so much angsty dick potential that could go in so many ways because he's such a complex character that all of them apply.
LOL!!! I totally think he would get impulsive piercings too. Maybe when he's drunk and pissed and then the next day he would wake up be like wtf. He'd sit in turmoil and a little regret for a while and then be like whatever because these piercing are freaking cool.
Bonus: no one (except the og titans and Alfred bc Dick never keeps anything from Alfred and the titans are family) ever find out about the piercings and it's kept a tightly guarded secret until a decade later when he does something in the batcave and one of the batkids notice and they're like, "DICK YOU HAVE A PIERCING?!" The rest of them just about break their neck whipping their head around to look at him. Dick just shrugs nonchalantly because time has tempered him and goes, "oh yeah. I guess. I forgot." Bruce passes out and wakes up on the floor to Dick hovering worriedly over him while the rest of the family watches in amusement at his predicament and also half brokenly because their golden boy big brother has piercings. Plural.
Bruce gasped out a pained breath, "Piercings?"
Dick stared at him silently, gemstone eyes holding his gaze as the quiet of the cave melted the seconds into hours. His eyes slowly slid from Bruce's to where the rest of the family was standing, watching them with bated breath for his answer, before they met Bruce's hopeful ones again.
"No." Bruce, with all the strength left in his body after recovering, raised a questioning eyebrow as Dick continued, "I don't have any piercings and never did."
"Hmn." But he swore he could've seen-
The kids erupted in protests.
"Dick, come on!" Jason hollered, pushing forward. "We clearly saw it there-"
"Where?" Dick asked, spreading his arms wide and invitingly, offering them to see for themselves.
The piercing they had all gotten the barest glimpse of was gone from where they had seen it on Dick.
"But you said you! You said, 'yeah. I guess so. I forgot.'" Stephanie put her hands on her hips, "Admit it Boy Piercing!"
"Boy Piercing?!"
"Fess up, pretty boy!"
"Steph," Dick visibly bit his lip to keep from laughing, "I was joking. You guys should've see your reactions - they were so funny!! Dick has a piercing. OMG. You people were hilarious."
Damian clicked his tongue. "Enough Richard! Did you implement metal into you skin like a heathen? Richard, how could you?! Who dare touch-"
"No Dami!" Dick quickly interfered to prevent a possible murder on his behalf, "I was just kidding, okay? Besides, did you guys even really see it? Like full on?"
Harper crossed her arms. "Close enough."
Dick quirked his eyebrow at that. "But you didn't actually see it right? You thought you saw something shining and turned to look. C'mon you guys know what it is - peripheral vision hallucinations. Things you see in your peripheral vision that aren't real because you are tired," He pinned a look at each other, emphasizing the words, "and stressed."
Dick pressed his lips together and folded his arms. "Time for bed. Now. I know you all haven't been sleeping for the past few days so you all are going to bed. At the manor." Dick finished, shooting Jason a look when he tried secretly shuffling toward his bike.
The rest of them were unmoved for a moment but quickly caved under Dick's patented "I'm mom-ing you."™ stare as Jason liked to call it.
They trudged upstairs while Bruce and Dick watched in companionable silence.
Bruce turned to look at Dick as the sounds of their bickering and footsteps faded away.
"How did you do it?"
Dick hummed distractedly and tilted his head to look down at Bruce still sitting on the floor. "Do what?"
Bruce growled, impatience, annoyance, and apprehension swimming in his voice, "Don't lie. To me. How did you hide it? Now. And for so long?"
Bruce watched tensed as the tip of Dick's tongue ran over the ridges of his top row of teeth, the first sign of anger he had seen from him in weeks. The pink flesh of his tongue barely avoiding cutting itself on the slightly too sharp canines that Dick loved to call his vampire teeth since he was little. He had even threw a veteran-dentist-scaring-tantrum in the dentist's office when the man suggested shaving them down once.
Bruce watched warily as Dick crouched down, balancing on his balls of his feet like a cat on a fence, and forcefully tamped down the sudden urge to pull out a hidden batarang when the boy grinned, eyes lighting with the wild fire of joy and madness from his robin days that still had Bruce on edge for decades.
"How did you it?" He asked again, not sure if he really wanted to know anymore but the principle remained. There was no way Dick's activities could be hidden for so long. He didn't invest in his detective following skills for something like this to escape his observation. But at the same time Dick had evaded his tracking skills when he was seventeen and ran away from him. But something so obvious as a piercing would never escape his notice. But a whole 17 year old boy also shouldn't have escaped his notice. However, Bruce had improved. He had gotten better at his job and his skills. Right? Right, of course, he was the best in the world. Dick definitely did have a piercing. But...on the off chance...what if he really had just seen a flash of light? Sweat on a body? The edge of a birdarang? Peripheral vision hallucinations? "Do you?"
"Do I what?"
You already know what I'm asking. Bruce thought, frustrated with Dick for lying. Frustrated with himself for not knowing if Dick was lying.
"Do you have piercings?" Bruce ground out.
Dick laughed, his voice echoing like choir bells in the spacious cave and bouncing off the stalactites to create a ringing, haunting melody as he leaned in closer to Bruce.
"C'mon, B! You know every showman's got his own tricks," Dick grinned brightly.
And you're the whole damn circus. Bruce hissed viciously in his mind.
Dick's eyes twinkled back at him.
#gaslight gatekeep girlboss dick grayson#Tim would be the only batkid to know because of his dedicated stalker#when he heard Dick in pain he almost abandoned his secrecy to kill someone with a nail gun#but instead almost dropped it on his foot when he saw Dick fiddling with his new piercing#he fainted in the shadows#and then woke up immediately to snap pics#and then tracked down the artist who did just in case#dick grayson#nightwing#bruce wayne#batman#tim drake#red robin#damian wayne#robin#jason todd#red hood#stephanie brown#spoiler#harper row#thanks for the ask!#batfam headcanons#batfamily#cl anon asks#cl asks
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Safe Bet
[Swarm Disaster V]
Qingque:I heard you like to gamble?
Aventurine:You could call it the spice of my life. Let me guess, you’re betting I will do well?
Qingque:Oh that’s way too simple. We will have no healer.
Aventurine:…What?
Qingque:I tend to try to take things easy but after numerous failures here it’s only natural to form plans. I’m not betting on you doing well, I’m wagering your ability to protect us long enough for us to gather blessing I need plus curios.
Aventurine:And how long to you typically last in here?
Silver Wolf: The first elite. Sometimes we make it.
Sparkle:If we get resonance. Though your fellow gambler over here has gotten much more reliable since our last attempt.
Aventurine:..Alright. Let’s do it. Should be fun. Let’s see what’s about curio option number one!
Nullify attacks
QASS: (Oh shit this might actually be the run…)
Floor 2
Aventurine:Little lady, is there any reason why you refuse to keep a shield?
Silver Wolf: It’s not my fault these enemies understand who the real threat is. I’m alive aren’t I? Good job, but I recommend investing in speed.
Aventurine:Learn to take a hit.
Qingque:Don’t sweat it guys. It’s time for the easier part. *presses downloader*
Acheron:Hey. Oh, it’s you.
Aventurine:I think that’s my line. To think I’d get your aid in a place like this.
Acheron:I’m just here to cut through the fodder and potentially give you a chance to win it big. Consider me your guide.
Aventurine:We’re bound to get lost then.
Acheron:Heh, then I guess you’ll be getting enough blessings. Stay close.
xxxxx
Knight of beauty appears
Aventurine:Well would you look at that!
Sparkle:Okay, so I typically don’t care how far these runs go, but if you somehow ruin this I’m actually going to be disappointed.
Aventurine:Oh you know a situation is dire if I have a Fool acting serious. I was already planning on proving my value anyway.
Floor 3
Silver Wolf: Well it’s be real everyone. Don’t really need me for that oversized bug. It’s got every weakness you need.
Sparkle:What an interesting way of saying “I am a liability.”
Silver Wolf:It’s simple strategy. We didn’t come all this way to gain nothing. I’ll just cheer from the bench. Qingque, don’t miss your crits. *
Qingque:I literally can’t.
Silver Wolf:And don’t eat too many points. *leaves*
Qingque:…No promise. *hits downloader*
Ruan Mei: Shall we begin?
Aventurine:All this talent and you needed my help?
Ruan Mei:Have you ever felt the wind shear of a Swarm Disaster? Some people say it’s like a personal hurricane on your body.
Qingque:I’m “some people”
xxxxxx
20+ Propagation blessings. Various Curios, interplays achieved, and additional blessings gained. Danger level Eight
Swarm buzzing violently
Qingque:I’m gonna be honest guys, I don’t know if I’m trembling because I’m nervous, or because this is about to be pretty spectacular. Aventurine, if you would? *holds out tiles*
Aventurine:Heh, you really want all the luck possible huh? Alright then, strut yourself.
He leans over to his left and gently blows on the pieces.
“Let’s play a game!” Qingque tosses them into the air and twirls as metamorphosis begins; catching the pieces as they fell. Without stopping, she throws out a four of kind then immediately flicks her wrist like a slite of hand trick to reveal another set of tiles to throw.
The experienced gambler watches the girl pass the tiles between her hands twice before throwing another eight, killing a bug and keeping the pace by tossing a new set once before suddenly slamming down a tile that shakes everything and hands her another four of a kind she quickly turned into eight. It’s still her turn. Gambling is partly a numbers game, and Qingque has clearly crunched them.
Aventurine:(Oh shit…)
Sparkle:Wooooo! Don’t stop the fireworks!
Three more tosses before another hit! No worries! Qingque happily took a single tile and beamed it another insect before slamming down another that caused it to explode. She tossed her set to a corner bug as she took another break turn to eat up all four points before hearing Sparkle laughing as she topped off the difference.
Qingque: Can’t stop won’t stop!
Another eight tiles exploded and knocked the main bug down briefly. Aventurine was thinking he didn’t need to be here, until it got back up and tore through the shield like paper. Without hesitation he let his wealth pour down like rain and redeployed a shield. He confidently scoffed, but Ruan Mei could see his hand twitch in his pocket.
Ruan Mei:Fear is a healthy way of understanding your current situation as well providing alertness. Are you alert?
Aventurine: Vividly. *stacks shield*
Ruan Mei:Welcome to the Swarm Disaster.
Qingque:You get a front row seat to VICTORY!
1,500,000
#honkai star rail#hsr ruan mei#hsr aventurine#hsr acheron#hsr qingque#hsr sparkle#I won#hsr silver wolf#I am free from swarm and now trapped in golden gears
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Hi Mara,
I wanted to say that all of your writing feels extremely genuine, and I am inspired by the honesty and detachment in your retrospective posts, especially when talking about personal—external—influences. I rarely hear others say that their interest in X is simply gone, or admit that they like(d) Y because the ‘context’ seemingly urged them to. A pattern I often notice instead is personal attachment and the unwillingness to let go of ideas and things which no longer resonate or never really have in the first place.
I wish it was easy to distill all of one’s experiences and likes, remember why and how they came to be, be honest as to how one felt about them, separate the wheat from the chaff, and arrive at something that feels truly genuine and ‘you’.
It feels reductive and probably comes with projection on my part, but that’s the impression I get.
Hope the storm didn’t affect you and your family too much.
Good morning, anonymous--thank you very much for such a kind message!
I wrote about this more vaguely in last months subscriber post, reflecting on "how nothing seemed to scare me" lately and how baffling it seemed that people thought Stephen King's Apt Pupil was a terrifying horror story, and incidentally had been thinking about this during the period of having power but having no internet after Hurricane Milton--I had all these videogames I tried to play but realized they all felt completely boring and uninteresting without something to listen (my favorite streamer, my favorite podcast) to while playing (and in turn, that I needed to be doing something somewhat stimulating while listening to something); I had all these anime shows I could be watching, too, but again little interest because they were all just dead boring--and all I could really manage for myself were to read Henry James and rediscover my old Longmont Potion Castle collection to listen to until internet came back;
but, I don't know how much the genuine 'you' matters; I think about something a sculpture professor told me about the hippies and an adage they had that went kill your parents, and the professor added that it was meant not (always) literally, but to disentangle yourself from 'the origin' or: maybe: the most sacred and profane feelings you see yourself as being a-part of;
realizing I basically have zero interest in being an artist might have been a big hurdle for me to disentangle from way-back in Wilderness when I had some ego-fear of losing my identity as Marabarl and what that entailed: divulging everything about myself, being self destructive, seeming crazy, and using it all as oil to art--severing that all seemed like it would drive me more lonely and leave me with nothing but some bare-dry stick of a person that'd few people would be interested in (but glimpsing at this idea also spoke to how 'being an artist' had little to do with my own desire and more to do with maintaining 'connection' with 'invisible others'). I don't know if killing my parent there had left me a more true version of myself, but it severed connections I mostly kept entwined by wholly out of fear of the loneliness or of letting go of a familiar rot and pain. I'm far more boring than the older Mara, because really now all I'd like to do is go to my weekly sandwich shop, cook, clean, read, listen to audiobooks, be monotonously religious, and try to write bad fiction that I never finish because I keep rewriting the same few parts for months at a time.
There's a quote from a book I finished a few days ago, For Thy Great Pain Have Mercy On My Little Pain, by Victoria Mackenzie, that I really loved:
"When the day begins, we say that it is breaking. So with my life. Part of me had to be taken into pieces before I could truly start to live. For in my shewings Jesus had said, 'I shall shatter you for your vain passions and your vicious pride; and after that I shall gather you together and make you humble and meek, pure and holy, be oneing you to me.'
My will was broken and I am glad of it. I am only a thing that moves this broom and sweeps the curled leaves and corpses of insects from one side of my cell to the other."
Each layer of myself, as it seems with age, starts to seem more-and-more to be a vanity that I hold to myself well-after it has separated and shed, out of fear and comfort for the more simple figure that is underneath--morosely, I start to really believe the purest part of my-self comes with death when all has been shed away wholly and the carcass is left as the most simple and un-connected atom of Me, and for others: when the Left are shred out to ash and the Right are ate up to heaven; tears and emotion for the dead, too, a type of vanity over wishing that lost other to not be gone from the identity yet though it is truly just another vain callous now shed and clung-to: Dieth and Daniela who I keep getting mad at in fear of letting go-of;
but even in more simple ways--remembering old loves towards things like Narutaru and not wanting to let go because of how fond and warm they felt just a few years ago, and keeping that old passion around like it were furniture that had gone decrepit past any real function except favor; although, during Hurricane Milton, again between time of Power but no Internet, I rewatched some of FLCL and .hack//sign and wished I could be rewatching Hey Arnold's scary episodes--cause really no-matter how much I think I'm capable of letting go of things that seem all vain, boring, and worthless to the simple self, I am a simple creature who wants comfort in the familiar and to things I've loved and felt loved by. And, luckily, I still love Boogiepop! (I think it's easier to keep a love for those things around because they don't really remind me of bad-times as Narutaru does, but I'd like to always keep an effort to keep Hiroko and cute little Ensof in my heart)
Take care.
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I am sorry if this comes off as rude but I was wondering why you think that Tommy was referring to himself during the hanger scene in 704?
hi! not rude at all, i love chatting about this stuff.
i'm not super serious about it, it was just a fun little thought i had since we know tommy was checking out buck at the hanger and likely trying to gauge if he was queer or interested.
i was rewatching the scene and realised just how flirty tommy came across during the coffee mug line, and how he himself can be considered a badass for stealing a chopper and flying them into a hurricane on a whim. we know buck thinks tommy is cool (chim and eddie agree) so my mind just added an extra layer to the flirtation.
(and i do think it was an intentional flirtation, the same way the my fees are competitive comment about private flying lessons was, testing the waters.)
that being said, i think tommy is a pretty humble guy. he'll joke about his renowned fake mouth static, but he has self-esteem issues (see:the loft scene where he doesn't feel deserving of buck's praise). he's proud of his job/abilities but never stops trying to do better and be better, proud of his personal growth, and he goes after what he wants (re:evan). but i think if he was referring to himself as a 'badass' on some level it was either unconscious or meant in a jokey way.
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spideypool thoughts because i am back in my sm/dp phase and loving every goddamn second of it !!
- something about the way their dynamic is actually healthy??? yeah no FUCK the i-can-change-him idea, but rather the I-CAN-CHANGE-FOR-HIM idea??? obsessed and I love it in terms of spideypool
- i am ABSOLUTELY SMITTEN for the legendary fics where spidey gets jealous of himself and is left in a state of pure shock about it whenever wade’s swooning over his latest crush peter parker like SOMETHING ABOUT IT IS SO PETER OF PETER TO DO AND ITS FUNNY AND MAKES FOR A DELICIOUS IDENTITY REVEAL
- coming up to the topic of identity reveals I have a LOT to say about them, first of all I find them so important to the progression of wade and peter’s relationship. it’s important because maybe, on a more practical level, peter feels like wade has so much at his disposal to exploit his identity — but it’s that exact mindset that makes the big moment so special. who peter is behind the mask is him in a state of vulnerability; at the end of the day, spider-man is everyone’s shield and their great savior and protector — including peter’s. he feels like he has to be so strong and brave all the time and have his guard up, but the moment he takes off the mask, it means that he trusts you with his fragmented pieces and trusts that you won’t break them any further. NOW TAKE THAT IN THE CONTEXT OF SPIDEYPOOL, WHERE PETER FEELS LIKE HE HAS TO HATE WADE BECAUSE WADE IS WHO HE IS BUT HE TRUSTS HIM ANYWAYS AND DOESNT KNOW WHY. gold
- this is something that’s like said a lot but there’s something so interesting about the fact that wade and peter as characters actually have very similar principles and characteristic points — they’re both funny, both use humor and quippage to cope with the turmoil and struggle constantly thrown at them, and they were both thrown into the deep end at young age. where their characters begin to diverge are the morals and ideas formed by their unique and individual traumatic experiences and coping experiences. for example, if ben hadn’t died and peter’s rageful side and irresponsibility only consumed him, who’s to say he wouldn’t have become a murderous killer the same way wade was? or even a mercenary the same way Wade did to try and support himself financially and care for his family? and if wade had grown up in a supportive household and learned the price of his actions, who’s to say he wouldn’t have become a hero like peter? EXPERIENCES BUILD CHARACTERS AND THESE TWO HAVE SUCH INTRICATE CHARACTERS
- something about their perceptions of one another physically. I TALKED ABOUT THIS IN ONE OF MY REPOSTS but the way peter is just an average, pretty good-looking guy and every time I write wade describing his features, it’s not “he’s hot” or “he’s sexy” or “he’s a model” but rather the small things no one would find beautiful or even unique about anyone. big, chocolate brown eyes, crooked, bashful smiles, the way he forgets to push up his glasses — literally who the fuck would care other than a person madly in love? EXACTLY.
- in correlation to the previous point, FICS WHERE PETER REASSURES WADE HE’S GORGEOUS IN EVERY WAY AND MEANS EVERY SINGLE WORD. if you love someone TRULY, nothing can be ugly about them. and peter sees the scars and wade thinks he’ll hate it but in reality peter adores it and thinks wade is unique and beautiful and interesting and all of that. AGH warms my lonely lonely heart
- wade would be very happy to do the upside down kiss. this is in fact a fic idea so by any means please treat this as a prompt
- BOTH DISASTERS BUT BOTH EACH OTHER’S DISASTERS!! look I love tired x hyper but something about these two being absolute hurricanes of awkwardness and then bonding over their weird ass references with occasional hints of tired x hyper banter makes my heart sing I honestly just love them (BONUS POINTS IF THE HINTS OF TIRED X HYPER IS DEADPOOL MAKING A FLIRTY STEAMY COMMENT, PETER GETTING FLUSTERED, AND THEN PETER TRIES TO HIDE IT WITH A TIRED EXHAUSTED ANGRY LINE OF DIALOGUE) or perhaps peter realizing Deadpool is a fun guy and unknowingly doing everything in his power to hang out with him mayhaps?????
anyways yep!! some of my incoherent head-empty-only-spideypool thoughts that I would like to share with the class ! < andd not to be a shameless self promoter but if you would like to see these thoughts written out then I’m on ao3 wink wink cough cough >
#spideypool#deadpool#peter parker#spiderman#thoughts#spideypool thoughts#ya know for the soul#spiderpool#spiderman x deadpool#wade wilson#comic spideypool btw pls don’t hate me#I LOVE THESE TWO#ON BREAK AND SUDDENLY THEYRE MY WORLD AGAIN#— mq ☽nshit
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woag it's an intro post
hi I had my writing list as my pinned for so long but it didn't even have the desired effect so I'm making an actual pinned
(dividers by @witchrealms // layout by @rookmeo)
hi m'name's adrien I'm a minor I'm transmasc & autistic & bpd I use he/it and some neos listed here. I strictly do not use they/them. this is my main so you'll see just about everything here.
I am in a closed relationship please don't hit on me ^^"
my primary special interest is project sekai so you'll see a lot about that here. my favs are Rui, Ena & Shizuku, my favorite units are N25 & W×S, and I am a massive shizuruikasa & mizuena shipper (there are plenty others I like though) but some other non-media ones are etymology & alt fashion, I have others but I can't think of them rn.
I post vents here sometimes. I try to tag them or put them under cuts but I don't always remember. feel free to shoot me an ask about it if it bothers you, and I'll go back and tag it.
because of my bpd I have semi-frequent self-isolation episodes where I often softblock my mutuals. I am prone to dissociation which means I also don't always remember this. If you notice I've softblocked you this is probably why. Don't hesitate to ask if you want to know- the chances of me remembering to follow you back are slim otherwise. If I really didn't want to talk to you anymore I'd hardblock you.
if we're mutuals please tag;
pictures of crickets (or similar bugs that are dark colored with lots of spindly extremities, like whipscorpions)
anything related to the movie "girl, interrupted"
specifically sexual innuendos related to hospitals/doctors (anything else is fine though)
hurricanes, tornadoes and other similar natural disasters (note: this doesn't count for things like fundraisers for people trying to come back from disasters like hurricane helene and milton. just for things that are detailed accounts, or for things in fiction)
(list subject to change as I remember more things)
child death (same as above, you don't have to tag fundraisers or other causes for me, just for detailed accounts or things in fiction)
you can use #adrien no look as a catchall tag if you want but I do have the tags for all these things blocked separately as well. ty 🩶
list of sideblogs
list of rp blogs
list of writing
other places you can find me (tell me you came from here so I don't freak out!!):
discord: adrien9174
prsk id (en): 445440127091621897
AO3: matsuu_u
tiktok: niigosho.enthusiast
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Any interest in grading everyone’s first day of free agency? Would love to hear your thoughts!!
ooh okay ! well as tuned in as i am i didn't catch everything so this is going to be pretty incomplete/fairly uninformed but here's my attempt:
boston bruins: that zadorov contract LOL AND LMAO (i say as if hes not going to immediately skyrocket to excellence.) that lindholm contract might be even worse with the same caveat. A+ for me, a hater
buffalo sabres: what did they even do? C.
detroit red wings: kane is a bad move + jack campbell is fine at that contract + cam talbot is the epitome of "goalies? what's up with goalies?" + why do they have 4 goalies now. C-
florida panthers: lost montour, lost oel, lost lomberg. that reinhart contract is really good though. C+
montreal canadiens: if slaf continues on his upward trajectory that contract looks great; if he doesn't, they're already bad so it doesn't matter all that much. B
ottawa senators: what did they even do? get noah gregor? i hear he's very fast. C.
tampa bay lightning: where do i even start with this one
toronto maple leafs: the problem w/ all of the leafs' acquisitions is that they are Fine, some of them even Good, but they're just overpaid enough for me to not only get annoyed about it but also see 30 ft of insufferably rancid discourse every time i open twitter. B+
carolina hurricanes: appear to have lost half the guys i remember being on their roster, but the one dude they did end up signing was one of the small handful of good deals i saw handed out today. C
columbus blue jackets: this team's quality does not matter. you know what does matter? gaudreau/monahan reunion. A
new jersey devils: brett pesce's good. B+
new york islanders: anthony duclair's good but i mourn what lou lamoriello will make him do with his hair. C+
new york rangers: what did they even do. C.
philadelphia flyers: MATVEI MICHKOV IS COMING. TELL YOUR FRIENDS, TELL YOUR ENEMIES, TELL TRAVIS KONECNY, TELL EVERYONE!!! A
pittsburgh penguins: incredibly committed to the bit of only signing players over 30 and they don't have poj back yet. C
washington capitals: genuine home runs in here. chychrun... pld... matt roy... didn't even give out valuable picks to acquire these assets! A
chicago blackhawks: i think they're trying to crawl out of this rebuild with no other serious potential core members other than bedard, which don't get me wrong is a bad move, but i also think they're not doing a terrible job of crawling out of the rebuild. B
colorado avalanche: kept jo drouin. C+
dallas stars: lyubushkin is incredibly bad and they gave him 3.25 aav. and casey desmith is there. F
minnesota wild: extended one of the sexiest toothless men on earth jake middleton. A
nashville predators: A+
st louis blues: what did they even do. C
utah hockey club: that durzi price is a bit steep but hey, if you've never had the money before i guess you might as well spend it. also sergachev was a BALLSY move i will miss you my cunty mistress. also we (the nhl) have a fucking iginla again... for our health. we need an iginla. B-
winnipeg jets: what did they even do. C
anaheim ducks: what did they even do. C
calgary flames: sharangovich extension + anthony mantha. tidy bit of business. zayne parekh YOU are the 2025 calder trophy winner. C+
edmonton oilers: managed to get a couple good players on nice cheap contracts, improved their rush game even more somehow, and will have to re-print their goalie's jerseys because they now have two different guys named skinner. A
la kings: gave joel edmundson nearly 4 million dollars a year. D
seattle kraken: stole brandon montour from florida. B+
san jose sharks: unlike the hawks, seem to be actively prepared to break out of the rebuild and trying to do it. toffoli? great! wennberg? a little overpaid but they're trying to hit the cap floor at this point so it's quite good! rumours of pavs return to san jose but you didn't hear it from me. B+
vancouver canucks: jake debrusk is gonna be a good linemate for petey imho. the hronek and myers contracts were a little rich but honestly they seem to be a lot more coherent ideologically than they were just a couple years ago. B
vegas golden knights: basically lost every remaining original misfit/otherwise quality forward in an effort to keep marchessault, and then lost marchessault anyway to the Power Of Divorce. and now they have ilya samsonov as their starting goaltender. F
#asks#getting an automatic C for doing nothing is bc it is super duper easy to fuck your shit up by doing something.#thank u sarah ! ^-^
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what are your head cannons on what kai saw in hell it’s been a watch watch but i remember him saying he learned there’s no such thing a redemption i always wondered what he saw did Cade haunt him with Bonnie, his siblings, his parents?
also hope you’re safe in aftermath hurricane helene❤️
hi!!! we are doing okay - just coming to terms with some very hard choices and pretty heartbroken over the destruction/loss of life. WNC has been my home for most of my life and it will truly never be the same. it's going to feel really weird for a while, but i am thankful we are safe!!
okay now to the fun stuff:
ah yes so kai says "there is no such thing as redemption. there are only promises, and bargains, and tricks we play on ourselves to make us believe that we're good people...I'm not a good person, I own that."
so canonically all the characters that went to hell say things like they were just sort of burning constantly and being shown all their bad deeds surrounded by fire, but i do think cade is twisted up enough to make it more sinister. he was such a fun villain for me because his psychic abilities added this element of mind games to him that was so entertaining. (hated that they watered him down by implying katherine was in charge lmaooooo wtf was that)
i think i always pictured some kind of cross between the phoenix stone torture/burning at the stake (since that's how cade himself was killed). so for kai yeah, i think he was seeing over and over again the sibling murders, and then attacking bonnie, the things he did in mystic falls while trying to get to jo, and the red wedding, obviously.
what's interesting is that the hell torture seems to be designed to break them down and make them crack and lose their minds, but if we're talking s6!kai at canon they wanted us to believe he 'didn't care/wasn't affected by any of it' because he'd given up on redemption when bonnie turned on him. but that would mean that he'd probably just scoff it off ?? (also like this is heretic!kai, so couldn't he just flip the switch and become double emotionless??)
him being so truly afraid of cade in s8 does still make sense to me, but only because i subscribe to post 6x17 kai being fairly OOC in s6. like, remorse filled/earnest/trying to atone kai probably DID hate seeing all his crimes repeatedly for 3 years. he was already going through that in s6 on his own with nightmares and flashbacks and we saw how it was weighing on him. but the version of him they painted for us at the end of s6 should have wanted to work with cade.
i will never forgive them for making katherine 'queen of hell' when kai was right there. if you wanted me to believe he was truly evil, then let him be evil. don't make him grovel with the MAN WHO MURDERED HIM and beg for the big bad scary devil to let him go. absolutely the fuck not either he's an evil twisted mastermind or he's my unmedicated aspd boy who needs a good therapist. the wishy-washy way they write him will never not get on my nerves.
so okay as far as specific hc's go for me, i guess i would say i think it went something like this:
"I mean, you'd think he'd at least flip a coin," Kai sighs, taking a few strolling steps closer to where Bonnie lays stretched out and bleeding before him. "Heads, he picks you, tails, he picks-" he blinks in surprise, the joke dying on his lips as the lights go out.
"Bon?" he calls, staring into the darkness now spread out before him.
Inky, awful darkness. The kind that makes his skin prickle. The kind that feels unending, like he's been swallowed whole.
"Bonnie?"
There's no answer.
There's no sound.
There's nothing.
Kai turns in a circle, looking down to find he can't even see his own feet. He stretches his hands in front of him, brings them up to touch his face, his neck, his chest - he's in one piece, his newly undead heart still beating, but something is wrong.
"Alright, what the fuck is this," he tries again, his voice breaking slightly. "Is this a spell, Bon? Where am I?"
"A spell?" A voice reaches him from somewhere in the shadows, teasing and soft. "No, dear boy, it's much worse than a spell."
Kai's eyes narrow, his new senses turning him towards the sound of nearly silent footsteps. Someone's coming, drawing closer through the abyss. "Where am I?"
"My home," the voice murmurs, speaking now from his opposite side.
Kai curses, spinning in place. "Right, okay," he nods, his jaw clenching. "Looks like you forgot to pay the power bill."
"Funny," a hand touches his face, fingers running over his jaw. "I do love jokes."
Kai stumbles back, his skin tingling with warning. "W - who are you?" he asks, his hands curling into fists at his sides. He expects his magic to surge, to gather at the tips of his fingers in a defensive wave, but it hardly responds to his call.
"Ah," the voice tuts, as though it can see him, as though it can read his thoughts before he's even had them. "I'm afraid your usual tricks won't work here. Though, magic wasn't always your chosen weapon, was it, Malachai?"
The sound of his full name makes him recoil, unease winding through him like a pile of vengeful snakes. "Who are you?" he asks again, his voice low and rough. "Where am I?"
The laugh hits his ears first, a moment before the flames ignite at his feet. They spread up his legs, vicious and fast, wrapping his chest, his arms, covering his face -
Kai's entire body locks up, half from surprise and half from the excruciating, mind numbing pain. He doesn't even have the breath for a scream, his eyes squeezed shut, tremors wracking through him.
His head spins, trying to think of a way to make it stop, desperate for some answer that won't come. Why is this happening? How'd he even get here? The last thing he remembers is looking over at -
"Bonnie," he groans, her name coming out a shredded snarl. Even as he says it, he knows she isn't to blame. If she wanted to hurt him, she'd do it with her own hands. She wouldn't put him in some fancy black hole, lit up with fire he can't even fucking see - "stop," he pleads before he can think better of it, "stop-,"
The flames wink out, giving him a few seconds to catch his breath.
"But I thought you wanted to know where you are?" The voice is back, circling him like a shark through deep water. "You wanted to know who I am, didn't you?"
Golden flame lights the darkness, burning bright in the hand of a man paused in front of him. The warm glow of the fire bounces off his dark skin, catching on the wicked curve of his smile.
"Call me Cade," he murmurs, his eyes glowing with their own sparkling fire. "Welcome to Hell."
**** Hell fucking sucks.
Objectively, Kai saw that one coming.
Of course, Hell sucks, it's Hell. He didn't exactly picture rainbows and butterflies. Still the fire, the smoke, the pain, the screaming - they're all things he might enjoy separately, sure, but rolled into one they add up to something truly...hellish.
And he hates it.
He hates it, he hates it, he hates it.
After their first meeting, Cade left him burning for days, or maybe weeks, possibly even a year. Just burning in the dark, gritting his teeth through the pain, until it had suddenly stopped.
Kai'd been so shocked he'd collapsed, barely catching himself with arms that felt like jelly from so long spent tensed and locked in place. He'd opened his eyes to find his fingers gripping grass, the color of it so surprising that he'd nearly thrown up.
Then he'd felt the sun, hot and bright on his back, and he'd lifted his eyes with a low curse. "What the fuck," he'd panted, staring up at the white siding, the wide front porch, the stupid tree stump.
He'd pushed himself up on shaking legs, took a few staggering steps forward and caught himself on the railing. There were toys dumped on the steps, handprints smudged low on the glass door, the entire picture a little too '94 for his liking.
"Okay, I'll play," he'd muttered, forcing himself up the stairs and inside, eyeing the blood staining the walls. He'd taken one look at the dead weight swinging from the stairs and immediately missed the safety of the dark.
"What's the matter?" Cade had drawled, appearing on the second floor landing above him. "Aren't you proud of your work?"
The sight of him, dressed again in that infuriating suit, had set Kai's blood ablaze. "What is this?" He'd snarled, trying and failing to get the front door open again. "You want me to tell you how much I regret it?"
"Of course not," Cade had laughed, strolling down the stairs to stand before him. He'd held up a blade, the familiar tapered edge already painted a sticky red. "I want you to relive it."
Kai had flicked his furious gaze up from the knife, refusing to take it.
"Go on," Cade had insisted, his usual smile lifting the corner of his mouth. "Josette's waiting upstairs. In the master bedroom, right?"
Kai had watched his hand lift for the knife, his fingers curling around the hilt despite the way he willed his body not to. And then he'd gone upstairs, and -
He'd repeated that afternoon alone for months.
Again and again and again, until he knew the exact expressions on each one of his siblings faces as they died beneath his hands, until he could time their echoing screams with the rough sound of his breath.
By the time the fire had finally returned, he'd welcomed it.
More time was lost burning, his mind so frayed he'd hardly heard himself begging for it to stop. Then quiet, and sunlight, and a witch with skin the color of molten bronze strolling ahead of him.
"Bonnie," he'd croaked, so painfully thankful to see her that his knees had gone weak.
"Such a lovely girl. You stalked her for weeks, didn't you?" Cade had asked, appearing beside him. His dark eyes had followed Bonnie as she walked ahead of them, unaware and unbothered by their silent presence at her back. "You watched her eat, sleep, listened while she cried over how helpless she felt trapped here with no one but a Salvatore for comfort. Why didn't you go to her, Malachai? Why didn't you help?"
"They were friends and she still hated him," he'd said, his throat raw from screaming. "I knew she'd never want me."
"Ah, yes, and how could she?" Cade had tutted, his hands tucked into his pockets, that awful smile curling his lips. "After everything you put her through."
Those memories shred him into pieces. Watching Bonnie grow to hate him hurts just as much the second and third and hundredth time. His hands shake each time he stabs her, each time she gasps for breath, each time her body smashes into the wall before crashing to the unforgiving hardwood floor.
He just wants her to listen, to stop running, to let him change it - but she pulls from him every time, no matter how hard he tries to hold on.
Then more fire, more burning, though this time he doesn't bother to beg for it to stop.
And then the wedding, the stupid fucking wedding -
Josette in her dress, pretty and smiling and so fucking happy he wants to tear her throat out with his bare hands. Ric looking smug and dazed until the moment she starts bleeding, his own will to live draining out to the floor alongside hers. The room shattering beneath his power -
Cade must think he enjoys that one far too much, because he's only forced to relive it once.
That feeling of being broken open for good fills him up, gives him enough strength to face the flames with an almost reverent sort of affection. If he can weather this, if he can stay on his feet while the devil himself tries to break him, what can't he do?
It's the wrong thought to have in the realm of a mind reader.
Cade ups his game after that, lulling him with false memories until it's hard to know what's real and what's a part of his game.
He spends a few months in a life where the merge was never stopped, where Jo died and the coven hadn't hated him. It shatters when the version of her trapped inside his mind drives him to true madness, her disgust in his abilities and calculated rage at his win enough to send him spiraling - even if it means taking everyone else down with them.
Another endless stretch of time gets eaten by a world where he never stopped the wedding, where Jo had her girls and they called him Uncle Kai and he let himself love them until the night before they turned 22 and he snapped their necks with his eyes squeezed closed.
Then there's a week or so spent with Bonnie on his arm, back in mystic falls with her useless friends. She likes him, wants him, up until the moment one of her precious vampires picks a fight and winds up dead at his feet.
"You're a monster," she says then, her power turned on him all over again.
Yes, he wants to scream at her, at Jo, at Cade, at himself. I know.
He's terrible.
Disgusting.
Monstrous.
And he always has been.
It doesn't matter that he wants to do it differently, everything always unravels. He poisons anything he dares to love, sucking it dry until only husks remain. His hands are weapons, meant to destroy. Even his name is a curse - an omen he can't outrun.
Kai forgets what it's like outside this endless nightmare. There's a world somewhere else, he's pretty sure it still exists. There's more than fire and memory and pain - but he can't hold onto it anymore.
He burns and he pretends and he burns and he remembers and he burns, burns, burns -
Until a deafening ring fills his ears.
The flames swallow the sound, crackling in his ears.
The ringing comes again, and again, and -
An image reaches him through the smoke, but Kai just lets out a ragged groan, in no mood to struggle through another twisted fantasy of Cade's design.
But then he hears voices, the clatter of dishes, and something in him roars to life. Fuck this.
Fuck Cade, fuck Hell, fuck all of it.
Kai hurtles himself forward through the dark, sprinting like his eternal life depends on it.
The ringing continues, pounding through him like a drum. He runs faster, harder, praying that this isn't another fucking trick - he tumbles headfirst through a ripple of magic, stumbling to a stop before he can crash into a familiar bar top.
Mystic Falls, The Grill - he's back, he's alive, he's starving. His pulse hammers wildly in his ears, his blood thundering through his veins like a freight train. He's back. He's alive. It worked.
This time, he's determined to get it all right.
Even if it kills him.
#oops lol#kai parker#tvdu#my writing#anon ask#i swear i could probably write a full dissertation on the parkers like#kai really is such a muse for me
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Hey Y'all. Want a Shirt? Pants? A bag? Bandana?
So, as mentioned in several posts prior to this one, I live in Western North Carolina, which has been devastated by Hurricane Helene. If you check my previous posts, you'll see that my place of work was in downtown Marshall--which was under 27 feet of water--so as you can imagine, I am currently very unemployed til we're able to recover and re-open, which is likely gonna be a While.
On October 5th, my workplace had planned to host a 2 day event to celebrate spooky season and the newly welcomed autumn, in which there would be activities for the town youth, raffles, giveaways, and local artist's/vendors pop-up booths to come check out. I was supposed to be one of the vendors there, but of course this was all before the flood.
I've made an ample amount of wearable art I'd planned to sell at our event, all of which is still in my possession on account of recent events.
So I'm gonna give it a try and sell it here, see what happens. With every piece I sell, I'm gonna donate a chunk of what I bring in to the fundraiser linked above. If I sold them in-store, the shop would be taking some commission anyway--but right now, they could really, really use the extra help. Seeing as my job is currently on hold, I could use a little, too, so? You get functional, wearable piece of art, I get paid a little, and my workplace gets a chunk, too--just like they were supposed to. A win win win situation.
All of these items still need a wash--I just wanted to go ahead and get photos, then wash them after I tried them on. They will be air-dried to avoid shrinkage! So if you see any white-pencil sketch lines, thats why. Priced according to how long each one took.
I take payments through PayPal and Cashapp--so if you see one you're interested in, DM me! They're all one of a kind, and free-handed by me :) Buyer Pays Shipping, and I do ship outside the USA. If you can't purchase, consider reblogging!! <3
Beetlejuice Tee - US Size Men's M. 70$ USD.
Season Of The Witch - US Size Mens M. 40$ USD.
Teeth!! - US Size Men's L. 70$ USD.
Everything Shirt - US Size Men's L. 100$ USD. Designs wrap around the shirt.
Centipede Sweats - US Size Mens M. Drawstring Included. 85$ USD
Deaths Head Hawkmoth Zipper Bag - 25$ USD.
Mushroom Bandana - 20$ USD.
Astrology Bandana - 25$ USD.
DM for questions, to purchase, etc :)
#appalachia#help appalachia#wnc#western north carolina#signal boost#hurricane helene#appalachain mountains#bleach painting#bleach painted#wearable art#shirt design#fundraiser#beetlejuice#beetlejuice beetlejuice#betelgeuse#teeth#traditional art
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