#i always love hearing from you bud

[f-imaginings]

i haven’t asked any questions in a long time cause i was super sick and now im feeling shy LOL😭 but anyways im curious about the sequel cause you’ve said you’ve planned out some notes for it and i understand you’re not currently willing to divulge any of the plot, buttttt hypothetically speaking is the sequel going to follow the canon that the book of bill set or do you want to experiment beyond that? also will it be close after the ending of kmky or will there possibly be a time jump (from a day or a decade)? will the rest of the pines family be involved or is stan going to be the only family member consistently popping up? or will none pop up?? im sure you wont be willing to answer any of these but hey cant hurt to try LOL

p.s. hope you're well and having a happy holiday season!

--------------

I hope you're feeling better bud! Being sick sucks I am cheering on your speedy recovery.

Because it's my birthday I will gift some details haha hopefully not big spoilery ones though!

The sequel will be called 'Its the best I can do'! It will be set exactly 1 year after the events of kmky after Stan and Ford's first successful venture out at sea, and their subsequent return to Gravity Falls to spend summer with the kids and stay with Soos. It will involve the kids, the Stan's, Old Man McGucket and the entire town of gravity falls including ghosts, creatures of the forest and adventures in the crawlspace! It will contain at least one heist (because I cannot resist a good heist) and many moments that could be right out of a rom com and it will be yet another slow burn, lovers to enemies to lovers!! It will be about 15 chapters or so plus an epilogue from an unusual perspective to tie it all up and it will have a happy ending, unlike kmky which will have an ambivalent ending at best!

Hopefully this swath of birthday spoilers helps you on your road to recovery bud, I love hearing from you and I hope you feel tip top in no time!

[ratatatastic]

THE SEVEN UP TABLE HAS TURNED INTO THE MONOPOLY DEAL TABLE BECAUSE OF NATHAN WORDS CANNOT DESCRIBE THE EMOTIONS IM GOING THROUGH 😭😭😭

[simonz-angel]

phone s*x with toxic ex bf simon

pt two to this!

the line rides quiet for mere seconds when he picks up, you can’t tell if it’s due to the lines connecting or his hesitation, but you know him… there is no hesitation with simon.

“hey, baby,” he breathes, voice light like an angel sent from the heavens above. you can tell he’s been waiting, in all aspects.

“hey, si,” you murmur, voice airy and shy. you can barely breathe. this is the longest you and simon been off, 2 months. 2 whole months no contact.

“knew you’d call me, pretty, been sittin’ here waitin’ for you, angel.” he snarks, chuckling to himself on the other end of the line. you can see it behind your lids, watching his face suddenly come closer, teeth glinting and eyes shining in something viscous. fuckkkk.

you giggle sweetly, fingers dipping just an inch lower, tips reaching ever so slightly beneath your panty line. “didn’t have anything else to do, m’why not?”

“oh? is that what i am, huh? just a pick up to ease your boredom, babe?” he laughs, and you see his eyes crinkle in crows feet, you’re hot, bothered.

you hug the phone closer to your ear, gasping with annoyance before hinting into a sweet whine. “y’know that’s not what i meant…”

you can hear his tongue suck at his teeth, tsking into the phone till it hits your ear. it has your fingers digging deeper, eyes rolling back slowly, and mistakenly you let a soft whimper roll through the speaker back.

it has simon perking up, fingers tightening round the waiting length of his cock. this is what he wanted, what he was waiting for. nothing came close to you, no one.

“you miss me, baby?” he sighs, head rolling back against his pillows. he knows you did, clearly with the soft breaths he picks up from your end. “huh?”

and the way he punctuates himself has your ankles flexing, toes digging up into your sheets as your fingers find the sweet bud of your swollen clit.

“m-missed you so much,” you gasp, listening to the way his laugh reverberates through the phone. you can feel it, in your chest, and it has you yearning.

“yeah, i bet you did, babe,” he huffs, fingers tightening up round his cock, bicep flexing up taut as he picks up his pace. “can’t get outta your stupid lil mind, can i?”

“mmm,” you whine, shaking your head even though he’s nowhere near. “needed you so bad, si.”

“poor girl,” he puffs, growing cocky. and his head tilts, lip curling over his teeth as his cock leaks, dripping down over the back of his hand. “i’m here, i’m here for you, baby, never gonna leave you, you hear me?”

and his words fluctuate in a throaty groan, and you can practically see the way his eyes spin back into his head, the way his stomach flexes, and the way his back bows up softly like it always does when he’s close.

“never?” and you’re trying your absolute best to keep composure, sentences… words becoming harder and harder to form with every passing second. “p-promise?”

“promise, luvie, just tell me you love me, baby.” n it’s a demand, one that rolls of his tongue with vile, force that has you whining and moaning up into the phone. “say it.”

i pray i didn’t fuck this up 🙏 @fairy-caitlin 😉

[swearimnevergivingup]

so uh i'm thinking about ex-boyfriend!nanami. you broke up with him 3 years ago but he's never been able to move on. he's tried everything. everything under the sun, and none of it has ever worked.

he isn't even sure if forgetting you is what he wants. he thinks he wants to let you live in the spot carved out for you in his heart, whether that hurts him or not.

and when you run into him in the lobby of your apartment building? one thing leads to another and you find yourself splayed out on the couch obscenely, the oversized shirt you were wearing hiked up to your waist as you slowly part your legs for him.

the world blurs around you.

all you can think about is this very moment.

the significance of what you’re doing is entirely palpable to you. you’re inviting him in, not just to your house, but into your heart again. 

breathing heavily, your eyes follow his every movement in anticipation as his fingers dance across your inner thighs.

his hands slip underneath the waistband of your panties, two fingers sliding in between your slick folds. you tense a little at the sensation as he parts them, the rough pads of his fingers prodding the sensitive bud of nerves that makes you shiver and whine.

“god,” he groans. “i’ve fucking missed this pussy.”

you let out a little laugh at the foul language that slips from his tongue. it’s been so long since you’ve heard his voice, and even longer since you’ve felt his touch.

“missed your cock too, kento,” you murmur, eager to show that you’ve been equally longing for him, if not more. you want to hear more of him, so you reach your hand out to palm at his erection. he’s rock hard, and there’s a little wet spot on his pants from the precum.

“fuck,” he mutters, tilting his head back. “it’s been a while.”

you giggle at that, a little woozy from the wine. “it’s been a while for me too.”

“n-no, you don’t understand,” his grip on your hips tightens as he struggles to maintain his composure. “you were the last.”

oh.

your eyes widen at that revelation, stopping your movements to fully look at him. “w-why haven’t you—”

for the second time tonight, you find yourself in complete disbelief. you were the last person he slept with? that had been more than 2 years ago - way more than enough time for things to change, for someone else to come along.

but then again, nanami’s always been a serious man, and by extension, that applied to his love life too. never one to seek out casual hookups, that man dated to marry. 

“i didn’t want anyone else. only you,” he murmurs. “that hasn’t changed.”

your heart is not the only thing that clenches at the raw sincerity in his voice. 

“say it again,” you whisper. “i want— i want to hear you say it again.”

“i only want you.” nanami must have realised how much you needed to hear that, the same way he had needed your confirmation earlier, because his voice is more resolute this time. “and this—” his hand moves to cup yours, guiding your movements as he slowly drags your hand over his cock. “s’all for you, sweetheart.”

one hand reaches for the back of your neck, holding you tenderly as he peppers kisses on your lips and all over your neck.

the other hand, though, moves deviously between your thighs, a singular digit plunging into your soaked cunt. 

nanami relishes the way you gasp into his mouth, back arching off the couch as all sorts of pretty sounds drip from your flushed lips.

i love you.

i still love you, after all this time.

he doesn’t say it out loud - no, it isn’t the right time. 

but he repeats it loudly enough inside his head, hoping that somehow, you might hear it too. 

a/n: this is part of my upcoming work: i never moved from where you left me (nsfw)

there are apologies to be made, lost time to reclaim, and parts of each other waiting to be rediscovered. and yet, you know him like an old song. you know the words, carved into the lining of your skin, you know its melody, a soft hum that echoes in the chambers of your heart. nanami kento is that lingering rhythm, that pained harmony, existing deep within the cracks of memory and longing - an unfading symphony in your soul.

comment if you would like to be tagged! <3

edit: some snippets here! taglist closed :)

[beanlot]

ellie, who unexpectedly orgasms as she’s strapping you.

you thought something was off by how sloppy she was handling your hips, her fingers twitching impulsively and the thrusts of the silicone in your cunt is faltering. maybe her stamina is no longer, or maybe she’s just not into you.

but you hear her exhale shakily, her choked up breaths. people usually tried missionary first, but not ellie - she wanted to see you ride it reverse cowgirl, watch your ass from behind in doggy, and she wanted to hear you cry out speed-bump style.

but she’s on top of you now, your lower back angled comfortably on a sweaty pillow, legs hanging off the edge of the mattress.

“fuck.. fuck.. fuck—“ she whimpers silently to herself, and your glossed eyes are fluttering open. you’ll call out her name with difficulty, ellie?

that intangible pleasure in your cunt she used to hit with ease is starting to subside, but it doesn’t matter, because your core is tightening when you see her fucked-out expression. her lids shut, eyebrows arched in ecstasy and my god, williams.. it looks like you’re the one getting fucked.

the constant rocking has been stimulating her poor, swollen clit. and suddenly provoking her orgasm, her hips are twitching like crazy, whimpering exhales sloppily seeping from her lips.

“are you fucking coming?” you gasp jaggedly, feeling the silicone burrow deeply into your hole in these random and unanticipated twitches.

you’ll cup her face, and her skin is piping hot, melting into your sweaty palms. her eyes are closed, and even when they are fluttering, you can only see the pleasured whites of her eyes.

“mm—fuck-��m sorry, i’m sorry baby-ah—..” she whimpers, too embarrassed to open her eyes fully for you to see her shameful irises, dilated pupils that are so selfish.

she’s using her remaining momentum to sporadically thrust into your soaked slit, encouraging those last ruffles of her rupturing orgasm, humming low and guttural as she does so. “felt so good—fuck, pussy feels so good, baby—“ she exhales breathlessly, her parted lips against your chest.

you can feel the hot air on your skin, condensation melting into the pores.

she tries to continue, for your sake, for your enjoyment. but it’s too much, oversensitivity that has her trembling like a loser; her arms are quivering as they try to hold her up. “i can’t-can’t go anymore—“ she whines, her measly thrusts forcing her clit into overdrive.

just the smallest tap has her overwhelmed. but you’re not satisfied, she knows this.

“keep going.” you demand, determined eyes maintaining a solid gaze at her own, your palms still framing her jaw. “i need to come too.”

and when she pauses, eyes glassy with the overbrimming bliss, you dip her face lower. her ear inches away from your lips, and you whisper with a callous hue. “you talked so much fucking game, so fuck me until i come. is that so much to ask?”

“i can’t-i can’t, it’s too—“ she tries to defend herself, tries to ignore the constant contracting of her hole; the rigorous pulsing of her tormented bud. but you’re quick to deflate it.

“it’s always about you, huh, ellie?” you murmur, slowly rutting your hips against the silicone. she can hear the challenge in your voice, the way you diminish her, the humiliating wetness of her slick.

and she loves it.

“stop being so selfish, and fuck me.” you order, your arms sprawling out to your sides - because you want her to put the work in, make the same mess of you as she did herself.

and she will. she’ll whine, she’ll beg, she’ll plead. can’t go anymore, i can’t, please baby as she fucks into you like you deserve. the veins in her hands prominent as she tries to keep herself steady, the definition in her abdomen from the clenching, and the pitiful way she’s crying out. whimpering for breath, a pleasured tear landing on your collarbone.

but she fucks you good, and you’re grateful for it.

[cyber333angel]

whenever logan ate you out it was almost never for you, sure you would be the one receiving pleasure but logan always somehow enjoyed it more. he loved the way you tasted, lapping at your cunt like he hadn’t eaten for days, gripping your thighs so close to his face that your clit was smooshed onto the side of his nose as he licked stripes up into your hole. don’t even start on the growls that erupt from below, hearing faint mumbles of things like “prettiest fuckin pussy I’ve ever seen.” as you cry out beneath him. “s’enough now logan..can’t cum a-anymore..!” you whine, twisting your hips trying to free yourself from his grip. a very poor attempt seeing how no matter how much try to move he still has you locked in front of him with your legs spread out. “jus one more, alright princess..try to give me one more I know you can do it baby.” encouraging you as he pushes two thick fingers into your hole, sucking at your clit as he thrusts them in and out. the two digits pressing deep inside you only making it more unbearable, which doesn’t go unnoticed since your basically swallowing up his fingers, logan loves to see you struggle beneath him.“that’s it bub, taste so fuckin sweet for me..” squirming and shaking your legs against his head as you try to take in all the pleasure he’s making you feel, tugging at the tuffs that are on the top of his hair, holding them like handle bars. it’s as if the pulling at his hair made him want to overstimulate you more, the older man smiles into your cunt while he sucks on your sensitive bud. “hngh lo, m’cum-cumming!” you cry out, arching your back off the bed as you start bucking your hips closer to logans face trying to chase your — about to be third climax. he nods as he brings his face closer to you, enticing you to use him until you cum, moaning and groaning out in pleasure. “there we fucking go, that’s my good girl..” logan whispers under his breath, chuckling as you come undone with a last few thrusts. resting your head on the pillow catching your breath when you hear logan, “you think you can give your old man one more, hm?” he says rubbing his hand up and down your thighs, the obvious teasing making you shut your legs in front of his face as logan laughs at you.

[rowarn]

afab!reader, no prns, praise, edging, wet&messy, könig using ur clit as a fidget toy <3

könig, a trained lethal soldier, who suffers from anxiety. you would never know if you didn't know what you were looking for.

his biggest tell, for you, is the way he fidgets. with you.

you're like his own personal little fidget toy. his hands are always on you, kneading and squeezing your skin. most times you don't mind, you rather like having him touching you — your thighs, your waist, your butt, wherever he can get his hands honestly.

but sometimes...his hands wander. it's mindless, truly.

his eyes fixated on the tv playing some random show he decided he wanted to watch. but you couldn't pay attention, not when one big hand was shoved up your shirt groping your breasts and the other was haphazardly stuffed into your sleep shorts and under your panties.

he's toying with you so mindlessly, callused fingers sliding over your clit that has grown increasingly slippery with how wet you've become. occasionally he dips down to prod at your slick entrance.

his movements have no rhyme or reason. he's not even moving very fast. just sloppy back and forth flicks and occasionally he simply taps his fingers against the little bud that has grown so sensitive from his playing. sometimes, when something interesting happens on tv, he stops completely until the desire the fidget returns to him.

you're sitting with your back against his chest, situated between his spread legs sprawled cozily on the couch. he can't see the heated, dazed look on your face from the come-and-go pleasure he inadvertently gives you. he's edging you without even realizing it, full attention still focused on the damn tv. he isn't even hard.

that thought alone is enough to make you clench around nothing. he's really just playing with you like a little toy and that thought is so hot to you. it makes you cheeks burn in embarrassment as you continue to leak into your panties.

if you listen close you can hear with wet clicking noise that comes with his movements. your eyes roll back in your head as that sound alone has your back arching but you quickly settle yourself down, not wanting to tear his attention from the tv — he so rarely had time to settle down and just enjoy tv, you didn't want to disturb him.

the episode he's watching ends and you cast a hopeful glance up at him but he's waiting for the next episode to start and it makes you whine against your own wishes. but your clit is so hard and twitchy from being edged that it's actually hurting and you're so wet now that your panties are uncomfortably sticky.

it's your whine that gets his attention, pretty blue eyes flicking down to your face where he finally sees the desperate way you're looking at him, teary eyes and swollen lips from biting them to keep quiet. you can see in his eyes when he registers how soaked you've gotten his fingers and he has the audacity to look sheepish.

"ah, my sweet..." he whispers, ears tinged pink, "i-i'm sorry, i did not realize..."

he moves to pull his hand out of your panties and you whine again, grabbing his wrist with both hands to stuff him back down. your nails bite into his skin and he stops trying to pull away, instead pushing his hand back down and it's then that he fully resisters how wet you are.

"don't stop, please...i-i've been so close..." you pitifully beg and he takes pity on you. how precious of you, he thinks.

"i'm sorry, my love," he coos, fingers starting to work once again — properly this time with quick little circles on your clit, "i'll make you cum for being so good for me."

you can't even formulate words, instead nodding and spreading your legs even further apart, your feet on either side of his legs. he hums softly in your ear, chin hooked over your shoulder as he watches his hand move under the fabric of your shorts.

he spreads your sticky folds apart and begins to swirl messily around your clit, occasionally lightly tapping against the bud just to watch the cute way your thighs twitch at the feeling. you reach back and clutch his t-shirt in your fists to ground you. his cock throbs, churning up quickly, at the loud, wet noise of him playing with your cunt.

it doesn't take long at all before your stiffening against him and twitching in his lap as you cum with a cute little gasp of his name. he moans softly in your ear as he feels your clit throb under the pads of his fingers. you let out the loveliest moans that has his cock hardening fully against his thigh.

when you slacken against his body, aftershocks making you twitch periodically as you pant, he's tempted to stop but the fact you had sat there so sweetly and let him practically torture you while he watched his show made him want to make it up to you.

he sees the excitement in your eyes when his fingers dip lower and begin to press into you and he can't believe just how sweet you are. your so sticky and wet with the amount of cum he worked out of you with such ease.

"let me really make it up to you, my little one..."

[rafesangelita]

bf!rafe x thick!reader.

i’ve been thinking about how reader is insecure about her thick thighs and ass so rafe fucks her dumb in the mirror forcing her to look at herself as he says how perfect she is <3

warnings: unprotected sex, rough sex, mirror sex, mentions of body image issues and insecurities, body worship, praise, hair pulling, slapping, dirty talk, pregnancy kink (but rafe is serious about it??)

a/n: if you want to read more thick/bigger girl!reader, read this ‘thinking thot’ if you haven’t <3

“fucking look at yourself!” rafe grunted, wrapping a fist in your hair before forcing your head up to stare at your reflection. besides the obvious fact that you looked like a fucked-out mess, rafe wore a smirk that had you squeezing around him with a broken sob. “you’re so insecure and for what?” he landed a harsh smack to your ass, the loud sound making your cheeks heat, “if it wasn’t for this body i wouldn’t be able to fuck you like this..” you cried out when he let go of your hair and grabbed your hips, planting a foot on the mattress before drilling into you even deeper.

in this position he was easily nudging your cervix with every thrust, his fingers digging deep into your flesh as you struggled to keep your eyes on the full length mirror in front of you. “you make me so fucking mad when i hear you talk bad about yourself,” rafe said through gritted teeth, “saying you wish you looked better,” he scoffed, “..it doesn’t get better than this.” your knees nearly gave out from under you when he snaked a hand around your waist, his fingers working on your clit until you felt that familiar heat starting to simmer in your tummy.

“you’re so pretty, baby, it freaks me out sometimes,” rafe leaned down so his mouth was next to your ear, “you have no clue how many times throughout the day i have to resist the urge from bending you over and fucking you dumb— just like the way i am right now.” your eyes rolled back at his words, his praise shooting straight to your soaked cunt. “you make me hard without even doing anything, you know that? these curves are so fucking perfect, i could squeeze you and grab and rough you up just the way i want to. you drive me fucking crazy.” you weren’t only crying because of the way you were being pounded into right now, but because you knew rafe was coming from a place of genuine love.

you couldn’t help but feel insecure when you saw the kind of girls that always tried to get at your boyfriend, some even going as far as flashing you a wink when they stroked his arm while passing by. all of them looked flawless in your eyes, your insecurity creeping up on you and making you question why on earth rafe was even with you. questioning rafe’s devotion was exactly what got you in the position you were in right now. “look up, ‘pretty, i need you to see what i see.” he clasped a hand around the back of your neck, dragging you up so your back was flushed against his chest.

your body was on full display, your teary gaze meeting rafe’s as he fixed your head in place to make you look at yourself. “starting with this face,” he was still thrusting into you when he stroked your cheek, “i don’t think you’re real sometimes. especially when we wake up in the morning and the sun is hitting you just right..” he planted a kiss in the curve of your shoulder. “you don’t even know this but on the days i wake up earlier than you i just watch you. admire you.” you moaned when you felt him hit your sweet spot, your eyebrows knitting together as you took your bottom lip between your teeth.

“these tits,” rafe took both of his hands and cupped you, rolling your sensitive buds between his fingers, “this is why i love it so much when you’re on top.” you laughed softly, a small smile playing on rafe’s lips as he continued rocking into you. you knew rafe wasn’t lying, he always looked hypnotized and dazed whenever you rode him, his eyes glued to your chest while you bounced on top of him. “these thighs are the same thighs that i always need my head in between. whether you’re sitting on my face or i have you pinned down on your back, i fucking love them.” he rasped, his hips stuttering as he began approaching his high.

“your hips and your waist..” your mouth fell open in a silent moan when he found your clit again, “you’re gonna carry my kids, i’ll make sure of that.” you gasped when he picked up his speed, his words hitting you right where you’d feel them most. “m’gonna make you have my babies, ‘give you even more reasons why you should love your body the same way i do. you understand?” you nodded frantically, turning your head so he could take you in a searing kiss. that was all it took for both of you to fall over the edge, rafe carefully laying you down on your tummy as he filled you up.

you two stayed like this, your kisses growing more feverish once he pulled out, rafe wasting no time in wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close. he traced the curve of your lips, thumbing away the tears from your eyes as you sighed. “i don’t ever want you to question the love that i have for you, do you understand?” you cozied up to him, whispering a ‘yes.’ before he hummed sleepily.

[jinxthekitty]

Just the tip

You and Heeseung have been dating for 3 years now, the only thing different between the two is sexual experience. Heeseung was older by 5 years with lots of 'bodies' he said and of course you are a virgin. He didn't mind and always told you he's fine with waiting until you're ready, which tonight you were.

With your legs on his shoulders as his thick tip slowly entered your wet cunt, whimpers leaving your lip as Heeseung held onto your hip. "Shit, love. It's just the tip baby, come on I know you can take it~" Shaking your head as you squirm under him with tears running down your cheeks. "It hurts, Heeseung.."

Feeling your body tense up and seeing those tears, Heeseung pulls back, his hard cock slipping out your virgin hole. His emotions quickly changed from desire to concern, taking your legs off his shoulders and leaned down to wipe your tear before covering your face in kisses. "Aww baby, I'm sorry..guess I got caught up"

He shifted next to you and caresses your soft skin "Caught up with your monster cock" He chuckled at your remark. "..can you do that thing you did yesterday" His eyes lit up as you mentioned yesterday actives, he quickly nodded his head. Sliding his hand down your body to your wet folds, slowly rubbing your cilt.

Heeseung's eyes darken with lust as he sees your expressions, his cock throbbing against you. His fingers dance over your clit, circling and flicking the sensitive bud before moving lower, sinking into your wet heat. He thrusts two long fingers inside you, crooking them to stroke that spot within that makes you tremble and moan. His thumb finds your clit, rubbing it in time with his pumping fingers. "That's it, Love... let me hear you... Are you ready for me?"

Eagerly nodding you head, he pulls his fingers out, causing you to whine. Taking this time to lick your juices off his fingers before positioning himself in between your legs, spreading then apart. He let out a soft groan rubbing his engorged tip against your slick folds with a swift, steady motion, he slowly pushes his thick cock into your virgin wet hole.

His hips pressing firmly as he fill you to a halt, he pause to let you adjust to his size and leans down to kiss you. Distracting you from the pain and gripping your hips as he slowly thrusts, setting a slow and deep pace for you. As your whimpers and whines softly start to fade, turning into pleasurable moans.

He takes that as a sign to fasten his pace and pulls away from the kiss and places his hand on your cheek, caressing it softly. "I told you it would feel good love~" you rolled your eyes before somehow managing to say "Shut up".

Heeseung took that as attitude and had the bright idea to deepen his thrust, making you moan louder and him chuckle. The sounds of his skin hitting yours filled the room, his tip repeatedly hitting all the right spot and making you arch your back.

Clenching your velvet walls around him, causing him to groan. "Is my baby close to cumming?" He smiles as he watches you nod your head, tightening his grip on your hips, using this leverage to drill his cock deepen inside you with powerful thrusts.

Heeseung watches as your breasts bounce from his thrust, your nails crawling on his skin. The feeling of your cunt squeezing his cock and your nails digging into him felt amazing, he wraps his hand around your throat and captures your lips once moan.

Swallowing your moans as his tongue dances with yours. His hand slides down your hip to your clit rubbing it harshly and breaks away from the kiss, looking down at you as he whispers in your ear. "Come on baby, make a mess. I know you want to~"

The pleasure from him was truly incredible, making you cum all over him. Covering his cock in your juices, Heeseung let's out a primal growl and slams his cock into you one last time before cumming deep inside your cervix. He continues to gently thrust, riding out his orgasm, his hips jerk and twitch as he marks from inside. Making sure none of his cum spills, before slowly pulling his softening cock out. "Did I make you feel good, love~ he chuckles as you roll your eyes "You're so cocky"

[cameronsprincess]

thinking abt… slutty!frat!rafe with an oral fixation<3 my baby @rafeyscurtainbangs asked for this, sorry it took so long babe but i hope it’s good🤞🏻

CW: smut! 18+ only! frat!rafe, mention of sexting, fem receiving oral, nipple stimulation for a minute, praise and dirty talk.

rafe masterlist | daydreams

rafe cameron loved using his mouth. he had a major fixation with having any part of you in his mouth. he could suck on your nipples or fingers for hours, the action comforting him in a way. he especially loved when his mouth was on your pussy. he’d once said he could live off eating your pussy, and those words alone sealed your fate, causing you to crave him as much as he did you.

you were currently laid in his bed, waiting on him to get home from a meeting he had with his brothers. you’re scrolling through tiktok when a text message from rafe appears on your screen.

rafey: “hey babe, i’m on my way back now, sorry that took longer than it needed to.”

you smile at the text, bringing your bottom lip between your teeth before deciding to tease him a bit, snapping a picture of your dripping wet pussy and sending it to him.

you: *attached image* “s’okay, rafey. been thinkin’ bout you while you were gone:(”

he reads it instantly, the little bubbles signaling he’s typing bouncing across the bottom of the message thread.

rafey: “goddamnit, baby.. pussy’s fuckin’ soaked, can’t wait to get my mouth on her, been cravin’ your taste for days.”

you: “you ate me out last night, rafe… for 2 hours…”

his response is immediate.

rafey: “don’t fuckin’ care, been twelve hours too long. be fuckin’ ready, be there in 5.”

you giggle to yourself, locking your phone and tossing it onto his side table beside the bed. you quickly finish undressing yourself, pulling his comforter up and climbing underneath it. his bedroom door swings open a few minutes later, his eyes filled with lust as they drink you in.

“goddamn, you look so fuckin’ good in my bed. you better be naked under that blanket.”

he quickly slams the door shut, locking it before he toes off his black nikes. he pulls his t-shirt up and over his head, tossing it to the floor before he’s ripping the thick comforter off your body, a low, hungry growl pulled from his chest when he finds you completely naked for him.

“fuck, sweetheart. you’re such a good fuckin’ girl, always ready f’me. always doin’ what i ask.”

you smile sweetly up at him, taking in the look of adoration that covers his face. all for you.

“rafey, please? ‘m so needy, want you to do whatever you want with me.”

he slowly climbs onto the bed, hovering above you as both hands rest on either side of your head, bearing his weight. he wraps a hand underneath your head, lifting it slightly and pressing his lips to yours. the kiss is slow at first, but quickly turns fast and hungry. he slips his tongue into your mouth, taking his time in exploring your mouth, savoring the sweet taste of you.

he breaks the kiss, letting your head drop onto the mattress as he lowers himself down, his lips kissing the corner of your lips, jaw, neck all the way down to your breasts. his tongue darts out, licking one of your nipples before he repeats his actions on the other. you writhe beneath him as his lips softly latch onto one of your hardened buds, sucking at it softly before biting down on it and pulling back. he smiles down at you, loving the look of pleasure that graces your features— swollen, slightly parted lips, heavy, half-lidded eyes staring back at him, silently begging him for more.

“rafe… please? i need you.”

he quirks a brow, pressing a soft kiss to yours soft tits before slowly trailing wet, open mouthed kisses down the length of your stomach. he presses a hot kiss to your pubic bone, his large hands gripping at both your thighs and spreading them open wide.

“yeah? you need me, baby? i need you more, need to taste this sweet fuckin’ pussy on my tongue, need to hear those beautiful fuckin’ sounds you make while you fuck my face. love watchin’ you come undone f’me, only for me, right?”

you suck in a sharp breath when his lips find your inner thighs, kissing, licking and biting at the flesh, the feel of his breath fanning against your drooling entrance causing your body to shudder.

“fuck, rafe. go on, be a good boy f’me and eat my pussy, yeah? you know you want to, stop teasin’ me.”

rafe chuckles, sinking his teeth into your inner thigh once more, making you squeal from the pain and pleasure that coursed through you.

he presses a soft kiss to your puffy clit, his teeth nipping at the bundle of nerves softly before he licks a stripe from the bottom of your slit back up to your clit again. he sucks the bud into his mouth, the lewd noises that follow cause your pussy to grow wetter, needier.

he mumbles praises against your pussy, the vibrations from his mouth have your thighs tightening around his head, “fuck baby, you’re soaked. love eatin’ this fuckin’ pussy, could live off this goddamn pussy i swear.”

your hands fly into his messy hair, tugging on the locks softly. his tongue glides up and down, the muscle penetrating your sopping hole every so often. you cry out his name, gripping his hair tightly to keep his head in place. you begin grinding your hips, fucking your pussy on his face, his nose bumping at your clit deliciously with each grind of your hips.

“fuck, fuck, rafe! baby, ‘m.. ‘m so close, holy shit…”

rafe digs his fingers into your thighs, pushing his head up past the grip your hand had on him. his darkened eyes find yours as he lowers his head back down, sucking your swollen clit into his mouth. his eyes stay on yours, burning into you as he pushes you closer to your release. releasing your clit with a soft pop, he groans, licking his lips.

“come on my face, baby girl. go on, wanna fuckin’ drown in this pussy.”

he shifts himself onto his knees, flipping you onto your stomach and lifting your ass up into the air. he slaps at your dripping heat with his hand, rubbing his fingers through your arousal before he dips his head back down. his tongue meets your dripping hole once more, tongue fucking into you. he glides his head up and down, licking every inch of your cunt, teeth nipping at your clit teasingly. the band in your belly grows tight, your skin burning with the need to cum.

“‘m coming, rafe!” you whine as you grind your hips up and down, matching rafe’s movements as he eats you from behind.

he sucks on your clit softly, not letting up until you’re screaming his name, body going limp as you come undone on his face. rafe helps you ride out your high, his tongue softly licking and sucking every inch of your pussy. your body trembles, legs like jello as you fall limp onto his mattress.

rafe flips you onto your back again, a cocky smirk played on his lips. “fuck that’ll never get old, fuckin’ love when you cum on my face.”

he leans forward, claiming your lips with his before his hands grip your thighs once more, spreading you open wide for him again. you whimper, “rafe… ‘m so sensitive..”

“awww, poor baby… but i’m not done with you yet, ‘m still hungry.”

wowza i love frat rafe n i love men who eat pussy🙂‍↕️ hopefully this is to your satisfaction baby💞

tagging some moots: @rafesthroatbaby @oceandriveab @starkeysbabygirl @starkeysprincess @starkeyisthelastname @maybankslover @jjsbaby @rafeyscurtainbangs @babygorewhore @xxbimbobunnyxx @nemesyaaa

[cursedyuri]

On my hands and knees begging for a fic where vi mocks the readers moans and the reader is super into it

bitch you’re fucking sick in the head. i love it. some kindaaaa spicy, borderline bdsm stuff below so read forth with caution! there’s aftercare tho. and 18+ as always.

vi’s trying to commit this version of you to memory: dazed and fucked out, tears streaking down your cheeks, your hands tensed around fistfuls of the bedsheets. your cunt is spread wide and puffy for her, so slick it damn near glistens in the dim bedroom lighting. dark, angry-looking hickeys decorate your complexion, and vi can’t even remember when she sucked bruises into certain parts of you - had she really spent so much time latched to your left hip? the inside of your wrist?

whatever, it’s not important. shes supposed to be focusing on giving you what you want - what you need. what you’ve been begging for since she’d first bit into the flesh where your shoulder and neck connect. it’s been two orgasms since then, and though you’re certainly more delirious now, drool weeping from the corner of your lips, eyes all faraway, you’ve still managed to keep up with the begging.

“please, vi,” you whisper, “please.”

your watery eyes search her frame, something akin to relief washing over your features when you process the fact that vi’s already slipped into her harness. there’s a wrinkle between your brows when you pout like this, and vi wants to lean over and kiss it.

“so needy,” she says instead, shuffling forward on her knees to settle herself between your legs. “can’t stop begging for it, huh?”

she grins when you nod along with what she’s saying, and through your lust-foggy gaze, you think briefly how hot it is when she smiles like that, lip scar stretching just so.

the thought disappears as quickly as it came, though, because now vi’s pushing the tip of her strap through your folds, moving with ease through the wetness spread through your twitching cunt.

“fuuuuck,” she hisses. her gaze is settled on your spread pussy, watching it drool onto the silicon. there’s something else she’d like to commit to memory.

she plays with you a bit more - she’s always liked to play with her food. you’re whimpering and gasping as she curls her hand around her strap, working it upward from your entrance to the puffy bud of your clit. the slick, wet sounds of each movement go right to her own clit, and she’d be lying if she told you she wasn’t leaking through her briefs right now.

“god, vi, i can’t—” you cut yourself off with a high, drawn-out moan, eyes crossing, because vi’s drawing circles over your clit with the strap.

“please,” you say again. and again, and again - a chorus of “please, please, please” until vi’s finally had enough. she pushes her hips into yours, sinking so deep inside of you that you swear you can feel her in your throat.

“that what you need, princess?” vi asks, voice hoarse. battle-rough hands smooth over the soft curves of your hips, and she digs her thumbs into the flesh to steady herself as she pulls out again, only to sheath herself back into you a moment later. all you can manage is a shaky moan in response, front teeth sinking into your lower lip.

“what was that?” vi says as she slams into you again, repeating the motion in quicker succession. “couldn’t hear you.”

you moan again, back arching off the bed, and this time, vi laughs. but as humorous as she finds your inability to answer, it doesn’t keep her from fucking into you faster, rougher. your cunt opens smoothly around her, takes her like it’s made for this.

“try that again,” vi tells you. she waits for that soft, whiny, pathetic moan again, and when the sound tears from your throat, she chuckles again - then, throwing her head back in a melodramatic imitation of you, she makes that same sound herself. she moans like you do, like you are right now - too fucked out to say any real words.

vi’s still fucking you through her mocking imitation, though. “hear that? s’what you sound like, cupcake. fucking needy.”

your cheeks burn with embarrassment, but there’s another flood of warmth elsewhere - your cunt gushes impossibly wetter. you moan again, trying for that over-exaggerated, pornstar-type sound, and whatever you do works, because vi’s red-faced and lust-drunk. she fucks you into the mattress at a dizzying pace, and all you can do is lie there and take it, moaning and gasping her name, your mouth releasing an endless stream of ah, ah, ah…

and vi mocks you at every opportunity, laughing with that self-satisfied grin on her lips, hips snapping forward to pull more of those sounds out of you.

after, when she’s made you cream on her strap at least twice, she smooths a hand through your hair and kisses that wrinkle between your brows.

“that was hot, you know,” you say, nuzzling into her jawline. she smells like sweat and sex and musk, that characteristically vi scent that’s always so intoxicating. “you mocking me, i mean.”

“figured you liked it,” vi says with a poorly-concealed smirk. “guess i’ll have to humiliate you more next time.”

“shut up.” you shove her away, but when she pulls you back in against her naked chest, smothering you in kisses, you can’t help but beam.

[gojosprettyprincess]

Every morning Kento would wake up half an hour before you did, clad in nothing but his white sweatpants hanging low by his hips and cozy socks before he brushes his teeth and quietly makes his way downstairs to the kitchen so he can prepare a delicious breakfast for when you wake up.

The fresh aroma of brewing coffee fills the kitchen as the sun begins to rise, he makes sure to sprinkle the right amount of cinnamon on your French toast, knowing how much you love it because it gaved it more flavor. A heartwarming smile spreads across his chiseled face when he hears your soft footsteps slowly padding down the hallway, making your way to the kitchen.

You walk into the kitchen and sat down on the island stool. Still rubbing sleep away from your tired eyes before he turns around to sets down two steaming mugs of coffee in front of you. “Mornin’ darling, How was your sleep?” he greets you in a saccharine tone and places a soft, affectionate kiss on your forehead. A familiar warmth spreads through his chest at the sight of you. Your hair is all tousled and messy with your pretty eyes still laced with sleep. He always thought you look so cute when you woke up, After all these years of being married, his mind still can't process how someone could look so beautiful as soon as they woke up. It was crazy to him.

"Good morninggg, Kento" You grumbled with a smile as the yummy smell of coffee filled your nostrils, effectively chasing away the remnants of sleep. "And my sleep was goood, how was yours baby?" you asked in a sing-song tone as he delicately placed a plate of your French toast in front of you. Kento was the best at making French toast, you always dreaded the days when he'd have to leave and go on business trips because no matter what, you just could get yours to taste like his— he’s a classic chef.

"Yeah? Well I'm happy to hear that sweetheart. I was a bit worried that I tired you out too much after last night" he replied with an impish smirk, purposely alluding to last night's antics to tease you.

Oh that sly fucking man.

A faint blush appears on your cheeks at the reminder of the very lewd and steamy night you and Kento had.

You tried to hide your embarrassment by taking a big bite of the perfectly cooked French toast, the sweet and cinnamon-y flavor tickled your taste buds as you hummed in approval of the taste. "It's 6:30 in the morning Kento" you playfully responded to his awfully obvious jest in the early hour, your voice slightly muffled as you chewed. Kento chuckled, leaning back against the kitchen counter, holding his mug of coffee and taking tiny sips as he watched you, clearly enjoying the effect he had on you.

"Can you blame me though? You're too adorable when you get all flustered", he said amusingly, You rolled your eyes but couldn’t suppress the smile creeping onto your lips. He always had a way of making you feel both shy and aroused at the same time even if it was early in the fucking morning.

Twt art :3

[xazse]

Cw: HybridNaga!SatoSugu x Female!Reader + big size difference + not proofread + obsessed!SatoSugu + Anal + fingering + rushed writing I’m sorry I’m working on bettering my writing! + weird cock anatomy

Naga!Satoru and Naga!Suguru who love their little human who happened to wander deep into the forest and now they can’t seem to let you go!

They were supposed to lead you back where you came from but after a few days they just got addicted to you, them repeatedly having to tell you: that you were definitely going home was just a little white lie so you’d get used to their company and also want to stay.

Naga!Satoru can’t keep his hands off of you, he always feels the need to be touching you, not even sexually he just needs your body heat he tells you.

Naga!Suguru who may seem standoffish with you but he loves talking about anything with you.

The Nagas love sleeping with you inbetween them, all three of you bunched in a tight hug slowly drifting off to sleep together, their huge bodies almost suffocating you multiple times thoughout the night.

The men start getting more and more relaxed with you around, eventually they get curious about you, they know a lot about each others bodies but nothing about yours, that’s not really fair now is it?

That night while you’re all laying together in your warm huddle you think they’re both asleep until you feel a warm hand sliding up the expanse of your tummy then grazing your nipple, it’s Satoru’s sharp fingers playing with your pebbled bud. You make no move to tell him to stop so he takes that and runs with it.

He grabs the fat in his hands and squeezes, he likes the feel of them within his fingers, you think you can hear him mumble how soft they are.

Another hand starts fumbling with your pants, Suguru’s awake now and fully wanting to participate. He slides them off down your legs and lets them pool around you ankles. He proceeds to feel all over your legs and inner thighs.

You guide his thick hands to your needy little cunt, basically using his own hands to rub at your clit back and forth, he doesn’t protest and lets you use him how you want. Satoru watches on eagerly still clutching and massaging your tit.

After a while you shove two of his fingers in your wet hole and push them inside of you over and over, Suguru gets the memo and does it without your help, your moans are so lewd and cute. He can’t stop looking at your face his eyes haven’t left yours you look so damn sexy like this.

He rubs the slit where his cock remains until its gradually becoming more harder, his cock looks slightly different from a human male. He strokes himself in tune with how he’s fingering you.

Your messy pussy is emitting loud slick sounds which spurs both of them men on, you have Satoru managing to fit one of his fingers inside only for him to pull it back out to taste.

“Suguru.. m-so close..” he stops his ministrations against your approval and goes to line his cock up with your hole, he presses you fully agaisnt his body as he easily slides himself inside.

You feel Satoru prying your ass apart, with small whines you can tell he’s feeling left out. It’s your first time ever having someone fuck you back there but you can’t find it in you to protest.

He’s sweet enough to gather some spit after finding out how tight you really are.

They don’t fuck you in tandem, Suguru is much more slow with the way he’s fucking your cunt, he seems to be more sensitive than Satoru. His eyebrows are knitted as he pulls his scaly body toward you, you can feel the slight twitch in his cock and you’re going crazy with the way Satoru is just hammering into you like he’s a virgin, well he is in a sense.

His first time being inside pussy is making him lose all rational “feels so fucking good, I swear” you hear Suguru’s strained voice.

The men really now won’t let you leave, the sex sessions happens almost everynight and sometimes even during the day when they’re both pent up. Just trying to relax around the cave proves to be difficult when you have Satoru wanting you to ride his cock and Suguru wanting to eat your pussy, they aren’t satisfied with one round either they feel the need to go for hours on end, only sometimes giving you time to breathe.

[pearlymel]

Sylus remembers clearly the day he found out you were both having twins. Twins, as in two babies as yours and his first children.

How you almost passed out when the doctor delivered the news, but he was quick to tell you that everything would be okay.

He's going to be the best husband for you, and for the twins..?

they sure were going to be a handful.

“Sylus!” Sylus' head snapped towards the kitchen, where your voice had come from, “come get your son before i cook him!”

He knew that you were joking. Probably.

the kitchen, one hand holding his little girl's hand guiding her along. "Now, now," he called out as he entered the kitchen, "No cooking the children, sweetie.”

You let out a sigh when you watch the boy run away while letting out giggles, his face and hands full of white flour.

Seeing this, Sylus let out an exasperated sigh as well, his gaze shifting from his running figure to the mess of flour on the floor. "Sorry about the mess he made," he muttered before looking over at you, a sheepish smile on his face. "Go to your brother,” he urges the girl next to him, she nods slowly before running off to him.

“I'll feed him to the ducks one day.” You say with determination, still focused on trying to make this dinner a success after the mess.

But Sylus chuckled at your threat, knowing all too well that you were only half-serious. He could see the twitching in your eyes, but he also knew that you loved both of your children dearly, even if they could be a handful sometimes.

”Though I suspect he would probably find a way to befriend them and make a mess with them.”

“.. why are you right?”

“because i know my children,” he says proudly, then makes slow steps from behind you to not alert you so suddenly, his arms snaking around your waste with his chin resting on your shoulder, “what are you making?”

You smile, “dinner.”

"Smartass," he teased, "I meant what kind of dinner are you making?” he whispers calmly, a soft conversation between you two, with his thumb rubbing ideally on you.

“hm, i could be dinner… but oh well.” you sigh dramatically and he laughs quietly.

You couldn't even continue because you hear a faint “ewwww.” Coming from the corner.

You both glance back at the two heads peeking out from the wall, and you roll your eyes.

"and here I was, having a moment with your mother," he said to them, his voice still low yet amused. "You two really have a knack for interrupting, don't you?”

Your little girl was the first to speak, “it was his idea.” She started quietly, her fingers fidgeting together, but her brother only gasped, “she's lying!”

"Oh, really now?" he’s skeptical, and he approaches both of them with his arms crossed, “Hmm, it's always the innocent ones who lie, isn't it?”

“but I'm not—”

“liar.” The little one huffs and looks away with annoyance, but the minute he could hear his sister im the verge of tears, he knew he messed up.

Sylus was quick to notice her distraught demeanor, his heart clenching slightly at the sight of her on the verge of tears.

"you," Sylus pointed out at the other twin, his voice firmer and authoritative, "did you cause the mess?”

…

Sylus let out a deep sigh, his stern expression softening slightly. He knew he was just being a mischievous little boy, but he also had to nip such behavior in the bud.

"You know better than to blame others for your pranks,” he said, his voice firm but gentle. "Apologize to your sister.”

The girl sniffled, the threat of tears subsiding as she accepted her brother's apology. She wiped away her stray tears with the back of her hand, a small smile forming on her face.

Sylus nodded approvingly, he patted both of them on their head gently. "There we go, now go back and play together.”

This whole time you were watching the scene with the biggest smile on your face, and Sylus was already prepared for your upcoming teasing words.

“and the father of the year goes to.. you.” ... except he didn't expect this rare sweet statement of yours. He's reminded of why he put a ring on it in the beginning.

"What can I say?" he replied, his voice filled with pride. "I have a talent for handling troublemakers." He placed both of his arms on the counter to your sides, boxing you in, "though, to be fair, they get their mischievous streaks from their mother," he added, and you gasp before turning around. burnt dinner it is.

[majinbangus]

》 18+ so you know how dogs love belly rubs? -> more here

One of Ghost's favorite forms of affection to receive from you is when you grind your cunt against his belly.

As a matter of fact, he likes it so much, he asks for it every day. After all, what dog wouldn't want belly rubs? And he's not subtle about what he wants. You always know what he's asking for when he lies on his back, shirt either discarded somewhere on the ground or lifted up his chest to reveal his awaiting belly.

"Jus' a little rub." He flexes his abdomen, unabashedly presenting his muscles in the low light of the bedroom. "Think I deserve some lovin' for my hard work."

"But you already got one today," You whine, cunt still sore from this morning and from all the belly rubs you've given him the past few days. "Don't you want something else?"

He remains undeterred. "C'mon, pet. You can't so no to your dog, can you?"

-

"What's this?" Soap asks, walking in after being cooped up all day in his office. "Giving the dog some attention, sweetheart?"

"He's so spoiled," You say as if it's his fault, but you can't help it; your clit screams at you from how sensitive it is. "Can't go one day without a belly rub."

Ghost gives a warning growl and clamps his hands on your hips in a bruising grip to pull you down. He makes you grind harder against his soaked abdomen, unflinching when you cry. "I'm not the one drooling a sticky mess outta 'er cunt."

"Quiet," You snap at him, "or I won't give any more belly rubs."

Ghost gnashes his teeth at you, but otherwise obeys your command, choosing to silently retaliate by slipping a hand between your legs to pinch your clit.

"Simon!"

Soap chuckles at your squeal, and walks closer to get a better view. Ghost doesn't let go, and twists your bud between his fingers. You claw at his chest, looking to Soap for help, but he ignores it, and casually swipes a finger through some of the slick you left on Ghost's stomach to taste it. Then he takes another swipe and brings it up to Ghost's mouth so he can get a lick.

"No need to be so mean to the dog." Soap pretends to not hear your sob as Ghost gets his fill. "You wanna show him how much you love him with some belly rubs, aye?"

You don't answer, but that's okay. The way your hips jerk against Ghost's belly is telling enough.

[drchucktingle]

my masks

hey there buckaroos. due to all of the attention the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION situation has gotten i am going to take a minute to talk about my personal way as an autistic buckaroo. im going to tell you about my masks.

im doing this for a few reasons, some are good FUN reasons full of love and some are not so great. 

lets start with the GOOD STUFF. first of all, i am talking about this because speaking on my way can help other buckaroo feel more comfortable speaking on there own way, ESPECIALLY if they are good at ‘passing’ for neurotypical like chuck is. 

unfortunately the NOT SO GREAT reasons im talking about all this dang stuff are two fold. reason one: i have been put into a position of having to explain and justify my needs and boundaries by the TXLA. this is not something that i WANT to be taking up all of my time, but when large organizations do not make space for those who they have pledged to support, it puts us smaller buckaroos into position where were have to defend our existence. it is not plesent but it is necessary.

the second NOT SO GREAT reason is that ‘passing’ bisexual and autistic people like myself are ALWAYS just seconds from being gatekept from folks both outside and inside these communities. there will probably be a day on chucks deathbed where i take off my mask and say hello to this timeline (mostly so you can all see how handsome i am under here but I DIGRESS). i KNOW with absolute certainty (the same way other bi and autistic buckaroos are probably nodding along right now) that when that day comes i will STILL be accused of ‘not being real’ and ‘faking’ because i ‘dont look autistic’ and i have a beautiful ladybuck partner in sweet barbara.

ALL THAT IS TO SAY, i am taking a moment today to talk FOR THE RECORD about my neurodigence and my particular needs. hopefully i will not have to keep diving this deep every time an organization takes a discrimantory action against me, but i will also say this: at least it is a good fight on an important battlefield

anyway buds, here is the story of my way on the spectrum

when i was a young buckaroo i knew that my thought process was different. i could socialize easily, which is unique in contrast to many autistic buds (it is a spectrum after all), but my social ease was for an interesting reason. I ALWAYS KNEW WHAT OTHERS WERE ABOUT TO SAY. it was like a strange ‘human game’ where someone would say one thing and i would think ‘well you actually mean something else’ in a sort of logical way (this is why i later related to DATA from star trek so dang much). at first i remember thinking ‘well i am just NOT going to play along with this human game’. i quickly learned neurotypical buckaroos do not like this, that there is a BOB AND WEAVE to social interactions that must be learned. 

later i realized ‘actually if i WANT to make friends and prove love is real then i can do this like an expert because i can SEE the game where most cant’. this got chuck many buds and took me on many adventures. please understand, i am not saying these connections are not important to me, they are just different. they are full of love, but i express this in my own unique way.

HOWEVER, while growing up i felt disconnected from this timeline in other ways, like an alien or a reverse twin trotting along in a world that is not quite my own. i did not feel emotions the same way my buds did. they would get upset over the ‘human game’ interactions and i would not be moved at all, HOWEVER i could see the way sunlight hit a window and start crying my dang eyes out over the beauty. so my emotion was still there and VERY STRONG, i just felt it in more existential ways (like hearing the call of the lonesome train). these days that feeling has progressed to where i am pretty much in a constant blissed out state of cosmic emotional connection (make of that last sentence what you will, but it is the truth). when i make existential posts online i am not just FIRING OFF SOME CONTENT, i really mean every word. this is really my trot.

anyway as a young buckaroo these feelings made me worry sometimes. i thought about various mental health dianosises and marked the parts and pieces that matched with myself. am i this? am i that? sometimes, instead of just being’ different’ i worried i might actually be ‘wrong’. 

when i saw david byrne on letterman in my younger days i immediately recognized something connected to myself. i thought ‘wow this is the mystery being solved before my very eyes.’ i could hear it in the music of talking heads too. i started doing research and realized that i might be on autism spectrum, something that was later confirmed by a therapist (back then the diagnosis was called asperger's). it was a glorious and fulfilling moment. i was SO EXCITED TO BE AUTISTIC LIKE MY HERO. i felt very cool because of it, and i still feel very cool because of it.

one of the big reasons i talk so much about being autistic these days is because i want to make sure OTHER buckaroos can have that same moment that i did. they can see chuck and think ‘wow i really like this autistic artist, maybe being autistic is cool’

so what does an average day WITHOUT wearing the pink bag look like for me?

my thought process is exactly like ROSE from CAMP DAMASCUS, which is part of why i wrote the book. we have the same stim (complex order of finger taps), we prepare for social interactions the same way, we analyze things in the same logical trot that neurotypical people might think feels ‘detached’ but for me feels natural (certain reviews of camp damascus are very funny to me in this way. you can tell when a reader is just very confused by existing in an autistic brain for 250 pages.)

from the outside you would not be able to tell that i am on the spectrum. in fact you would probably find me very socially adept. 

the problem is, all of that masking can take its toll. i spent years trotting in and out the emergency room, talking to confused doctors who could not figure out the chronic phantom tension and pain that radiated through my body. i eventually accepted the fact that i would either live a life constantly on heavy painkillers or just stop living altogether.

eventually, however, i started noticing a correlation between the way that i felt, and the space that i allowed for chuck and the pink mask. i was exercising that tension, allowing my mental mask of neurotypical existence to take a rest. i started practicing physical therapy and this time THE RESULTS STUCK because i was approaching from two sides, MIND AND BODY. after a while, i got my pain down to about 5 percent of what it once was. i still have flare ups in times of stress, but the healing has been very real and life changing.

lets get VERY specific now. if i attended the TXLA confrence without a mask and gave my talk i can tell you this: i would do a dang good job. i can work the heck out of a crowd and (not to reveal too much about my secret way) I HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO DO THIS ON OCCASION VERY WELL. however, going home from this event i would very likely be in pain. i would likely need to do physical therapy. i would likely need to stim for a while. i would NOT be emotionally fullfilled in the same way. in other words, without my pink mask i can charm the heck out of buckaroos, but THE SPACE OF CHUCK TINGLE IS NOT THE SPACE FOR THAT. the pink bag is a place for me to not have to put up with that tension. it is a place for me to unmask mentally by masking physically.

this pink bag space SAVED MY LIFE and i am not going to risk blurring these lines. if and when that ever happens it will be MY decision, not someone elses. that is my boundary. the part of me that neurotypically masks could handle a library conference in a purely technical sense, but the part of me that chuck represents absolutely cannot and should not be asked to do that without the pink bag. unfortunately, the complexity of this point makes it even MORE difficult for me to think about and takes up even more of my time, because it forces me to START QUESTIONING MYSELF and my own needs. to be honest, that is the most insidious part of other people questioning your identify and refusing to accept your accommodation needs without ‘proof’.

the thing is, while all of this discussion of disability and accessibility is important, i have a much larger point to make by writing these words.

a conference should not uninvite someone with an unusual physical presentation or a strange way of speaking REGARDLESS of it being classified as a disability. it does not matter WHY i look the way that i look and wear what i wear. i should not have to spend all day writing this post instead of writing my next book, just because my sensibilities are unique and my presentation is unusual. 

fortunately the solution is very simple: let other people be themselves. its not hurting you to simply accept and nod at the buckaroos you think look strange. let us exist