#i always forget i have a tattoo and im so surprised to see it when i look in the mirror

[crossbackpoke-check]

blessed be (lorscher bienensegen) | telling the bees (wiþ ymbe)

"Bees" [remixed, abridged], Claudia Emerson // "Letter to Someone Living Fifty Years from Now" [remixed. abridged], Matthew Olzmann // "Letter to my Great, Great Grandchild" [remixed, abridged], J.P. Grasser | Len Redkole, Nina Weiss, Brian Babineau, Christian Peterson, Mitchell Leff, Dave Isaac, Megan DeRuchie

[blackhillverse]

every six months i remember i have a blackhill tattoo and my mind just explodes, i love these two so much it’s actually insane!

[rookiesbookies]

Im not saying im horny for Sebastian Krueger

But Sebastian would let you trace his tattoos for fun while he grinds against you gently through clothes

He loves to rub up and down your body.

His favorite hobby is rubbing lotion into your soft skin. He’d never admit it though, he’ll just grab the lotion and start rubbing her.

Truthfully it’s like the only stress relieving mechanism he has in his life, rubbing knots out of your muscles the same way you do for him.

He gets so horny when you moan. He’s even hornier if you help massage his muscles after a long deployment he’s a mess.

His body is rippling and twitching under your hands, he’s rock hard and grinding into the bed as your massage an especially difficult knot from his shoulder. He’s both trying to run from your hands but craving your keep going. He’s biting a pillow so he doesn’t make any embarrassing noises as you straddle his back. He’s praying you dont notice how he’s grinding because it’s a knot that’s probably been in hid back for years and having you release that tension is heavenly.

When you did get it unstuck he came in his pants a little. He ate you out and fucked you real good as a thank you. Truly, you are hus saving grace. He gets so whiny when he has knots now and all his comrades notice.

His cock, you asked, tell me about his cock?

My darlings I’ll tell you about his cock.

7 inches, moderate girth, nothing too big. Even girth throughout his length but a big flared tip that just bullies your insides. Its like that video of the train ramming into the little hole in the side of the mountain sometimes.

Huge fan of cock warming. Like the biggest. Will make you sit on it while you watch cooking shows because it was your choice that night for tv show and he was so bored.

Dont get him wrong, he’s taking notes so some day he can surprise cook you a fancy meal, but he gets so bored. He loves feeling you breath heavy and lean against him as he plays with the lips of your pussy as you sit on him. Truthfully there’s no place he’d rather be than with you on his cock as he rubs lotion into your hands. He loves the way your hands go almost limp in his touch when you feel pleasure, like you brain can’t separate the resources to keep controlling them and that priority is only on senses to your special areas.

Truthfully, this gruff and brutish man loves nothing more than his girlfriend, even if he shows it through snarky remarks and oddly sensual touches. “I love you” just doesnt come easy to him, but thats ok.

SO MUCH MORE in comments bc why not

Masterlist is pinned on profile as always, don’t forget to leave me a comment or a request in my inbox to let me know what yall want to see!

[tomhardystories]

Part 7

Over the next few months, Tom and Jules fell into a friendship so easy it was almost suspicious. No forced niceties, no awkward silences - just a steady stream of sarcasm, late-night texts, and the occasional coffee that somehow lasted three hours. It was a dynamic that felt less like meeting someone new and more like finding an old friend who’d been stuck in traffic for thirty years.

It started with their late-night texts, which became a near-daily ritual. Jules would tease Tom mercilessly about his terrible texting habits, and he would fire back with equally sharp comebacks.

Jules: Still typing with one finger? I can practically hear the hunt-and-peck method from here. Tom: Mocking my process doesn’t make it faster. Jules: It’s character-building. You should thank me.

Their banter became the cornerstone of their friendship - quick, playful, and refreshingly straightforward. Jules relished having someone who could match her sharp wit without missing a beat, and Tom found it freeing to be around someone who treated him like an ordinary guy rather than a Hollywood figure. Their conversations felt effortless, an even exchange of humor and honesty that neither of them had realized they were missing.

When Tom wasn’t busy being a Hollywood star or a dedicated dad, they’d meet up. Their in-person meetups were equally chaotic. Tom was subjected to Jules’ self-declared “World Tour of Mediocre Coffee Shops” where she made him try suspiciously named drinks like the “Mocha Explosion Deluxe.” 

“This tastes like someone melted a chocolate bar in dishwater” Tom grumbled. 

“Yes” Jules said. “That’s the signature flavor.”

In return, Tom dragged Jules to a hidden bookstore in the West Village, claiming it was his “happy place.” Jules rolled her eyes but secretly loved it. She spent an hour mocking the over-the-top book titles in the self-help section before Tom caught her buying a collection of terrible poetry. 

“Is this for ironic purposes?” he asked

Of course, Tom’s celebrity life came with its own brand of nonsense, which Jules delighted in hearing about, and mocking.

“So this fan asked me to autograph her forehead” Tom said one afternoon as they sat on a park bench with lattes in hand.

Jules nearly dropped her coffee. “Her forehead? Were her arms broken?”

“She said it was going to be her next tattoo” Tom replied, looking both amused and horrified.

Jules wheezed with laughter. “Oh, this is excellent. I’m never letting you forget this. From now on, your brand is forehead tattoos.”

“Glad I could provide material for your stand-up routine” Tom deadpanned.

Moments like these became the norm: effortless, filled with humor, and surprisingly grounding. When Jules had a rough day at work, Tom became her go-to sounding board. He’d text her just to check in:

Tom: You still alive? Or do I need to send coffee and moral support? Jules: Alive. Barely. Coffee would help, though...

One afternoon, he showed up at her office unannounced, balancing two cups of coffee and a box of pastries for her team. Jules was quietly touched, though she deflected with her usual wit. 

Likewise, when Tom needed someone to vent to - whether about co-parenting frustrations or the grind of his work - Jules was always there, listening with genuine interest (and the occasional sharp comment to keep things from getting too serious).

“Why do people assume actors have it so easy?” he mused over tea one evening. “Because they don’t see you signing foreheads” Jules quipped, making him laugh despite himself.

Their connection wasn’t just about jokes, though. Over time, they began sharing more personal parts of their lives. Tom introduced Jules to his son, Louis, during a casual outing. To his surprise, Louis and Jules hit it off immediately, bonding over shared love of a specific animated series. Jules, in turn, brought Tom into her circle of friends, who were both intrigued and amused by his easy going nature.

“She doesn’t even roll her eyes at you that much” Samantha noted, impressed. “That’s progress.”

As their friendship grew, it became clear how much they valued each other’s presence. Jules appreciated having someone who genuinely listened without judgment, while Tom enjoyed the simplicity of being around someone who didn’t treat him like a celebrity.

There was no big declaration or dramatic shift - just a natural, comfortable rhythm. They weren’t just pals anymore; they were the kind of best friends who could count on each other for anything, whether it was a laugh, a coffee delivery, or a quiet moment of understanding. For both Jules and Tom, it was exactly what they hadn’t realized they needed.

Jules didn’t know what to expect when Tom invited her out. “Just a casual thing” he’d said over coffee, which, in Tom-speak, meant “I’ve planned something potentially life-altering, and I’m not telling you the details because I enjoy watching you squirm.”

When she walked into the bar, her first thought was that it seemed... normal. Warm lighting, low music, people laughing over drinks. Her second thought, upon spotting Leonardo DiCaprio and Cillian Murphy sitting with Tom at a corner table, was: Oh. Of course.

Tom waved her over, a faint smirk tugging at his lips. “Jules, meet Leo and Cillian. Guys, this is Jules - my friend, occasional critic, and partner in crime.”

Leo stood first, extending his hand with a mischievous smile. “Ah, so you’re the legendary Jules. Tom’s mentioned you.”

Jules shook his hand, her brain immediately short-circuiting. What had Tom mentioned? That she was sarcastic? Prone to saying the wrong thing? Once compared him to a disgruntled sloth when he was grumpy?

“Good things, I hope” she said, recovering slightly.

Cillian, quieter but no less magnetic, stood next. He gave her a polite nod and extended his hand. “Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise” Jules managed, trying not to be unnerved by the sheer intensity of his gaze.

“Alright” Tom said, gesturing to the empty seat beside him. “Sit down before Leo tries to recruit you for one of his climate documentaries.”

Leo feigned offense. “Excuse me, I don’t recruit people. I inspire them.”

“Is that what we’re calling it now?” Cillian deadpanned, earning a laugh from Jules.

The night started out easy enough. Jules was sipping her sparkling water, grateful Tom wasn’t drinking either - it made her feel less like a social pariah. She was trying to cut down on drinking, mostly out of solidarity with Tom, though she hadn’t quite mastered it yet. Leo, meanwhile, was holding court, effortlessly recounting stories about his environmental projects, dodgy fan encounters, and the time he accidentally bought a 20-foot yacht instead of a 10-foot one.

“It was an honest mistake” he insisted, taking a sip of his drink.

“Was it, though?” Cillian asked, raising an eyebrow.

Jules leaned toward Tom. “Do normal people accidentally buy yachts, or is that strictly a rich-people problem?”

Tom chuckled. “Depends. Do normal people accidentally buy a ridiculously overpriced bottle of olive oil just because it had a cute label?”

Jules sighed dramatically. “That happened once. Let it go.”

Cillian was clearly loving the banter. “So, Jules” he said, leaning in conspiratorially. “How’s Tom as a friend? Be honest. We won’t tell him.”

Jules didn’t miss a beat. “Oh, he’s great. Super dependable. He only cancels plans at the last minute like... half the time.”

Tom groaned. “That happened twice, and one of those was because my kid was sick.”

“Excuses” Jules quipped. “Also, he sends unsolicited playlists. Did you know there are entire albums of rain sounds accompanied by melancholy acoustic guitar? Because I do.”

Leo laughed so hard he nearly spilled his drink. “That is Tom. I love it.”

Cillian raised an eyebrow at Tom. “Still inflicting your playlists on innocent people, I see.”

“They’re curated” Tom defended. “Curated is different.”

As the night wore on, Jules found herself relaxing - helped along by the fact that Tom wasn’t drinking, which made her feel less self-conscious about her sparkling water.

“Honestly” Jules said at one point, “not drinking is harder than I thought. I mean, what do you do when everyone else is tipsy and you’re just... here?”

“You people-watch” Cillian said matter-of-factly, gesturing subtly toward a man at the bar who was gesticulating wildly with a cocktail umbrella stuck in his hair.

Leo grinned. “Or you start making up backstories for them. Like him - definitely a rogue spy trying to blend in but failing miserably.”

“Or he’s auditioning for the role of ‘drunk uncle’ at a wedding” Jules added, earning a rare chuckle from Cillian.

Tom, who was watching all this with a bemused expression, leaned closer to Jules. “See? You’re fitting right in.”

“Am I?” she whispered. “Because I feel like I’m one awkward comment away from becoming a meme.”

Leo overheard and laughed. “Don’t worry, Jules. If anyone makes you a meme, I’ll make sure it’s a flattering one.”

As the group shifted into smaller conversations, Jules found herself next to Cillian, who was nursing what looked like the world’s smallest glass of whiskey.

“So” Jules began, leaning her chin on her hand, “what’s the strangest place you’ve ever been?”

Cillian tilted his head, considering. “Strangest? Hmm. I’d say it was this tiny Irish village we filmed in once. Population of about twenty. The pub doubled as the post office, and the bartender was also the priest. It was like a sitcom waiting to happen.”

Jules laughed, picturing the scene. “That’s amazing. Did you have to confess your sins before getting a pint?”

Cillian smirked. “Not quite, but he did try to save my soul after I ordered a second whiskey.”

“Well” Jules said, straightening up, “I think I can top that. I once got locked in the janitor’s closet at the Museum of Modern Art.”

Cillian blinked, a flicker of surprise crossing his face. “You’re joking.”

“I wish I were” she said, already giggling at the memory. “I was trying to leave, but instead of pushing the exit door, I yanked open a closet. I stepped inside, realized it wasn’t the way out, and somehow the door slammed shut behind me.”

“And no one noticed?” Cillian asked, his brows lifting in amused disbelief.

“Apparently not” Jules replied, her voice rising as she relived the absurdity. “I was stuck in there for an hour, sitting on a bucket, surrounded by mops and the faint smell of lemon disinfectant.”

Cillian chuckled, shaking his head. “What did you do for an hour? Contemplate life among the cleaning supplies?”

“Oh, I went full panic mode” Jules admitted, gesturing animatedly. “At first, I banged on the door like I was auditioning for a horror movie. When that didn’t work, I texted a friend, but of course, she thought I was joking. So I ended up Googling ‘how to pick a lock with a bobby pin.’ Spoiler alert: it doesn’t work if you have no idea what you’re doing.”

Cillian laughed, the sound low and warm. “And how did you finally escape?”

“A janitor eventually came by and found me” Jules said, shaking her head. “The worst part was, he didn’t even look surprised. Just said, ‘Again?’ Like this was a regular occurrence.”

Cillian leaned back, clearly enjoying her story. “You must’ve made his week.”

“Probably” Jules agreed, grinning. “But I can’t step foot in that museum without feeling like the mops are judging me.”

“Well, that’s one for the memoir” Cillian said with a faint smile. “Locked in a closet at the MoMA. I’d call it performance art.”

“Oh, don’t encourage me” Jules quipped. “I’m already considering titling my autobiography Bucket Seats and Bad Decisions.”

Cillian chuckled again, and for a moment, the noise of the bar faded as they shared a quiet laugh, the conversation settling into that rare, effortless ease.

As they left the bar, Jules fell into step beside Tom, her heart light.

“Thanks for tonight” she said, her tone more sincere now. “Your friends are… surprisingly ordinary. For Hollywood, anyway.”

“They like you” Tom said, shoving his hands into his pockets. “Leo told me you’re funnier than me, which, honestly, I’m not sure I’m okay with.”

“Don’t worry” Jules teased. “Your ego will recover.”

Tom laughed, shaking his head.

As her cab pulled up, Jules hesitated. “Really, they are… not what I expected.”

“Yeah?” Tom asked, tilting his head.

“Yeah” she said with a smile. “They’re weirdly normal.”

“Don’t let Leo hear you say that” Tom said, smirking. “He’ll take it as an insult.”

And with that, she hopped into the cab, leaving Tom to wonder, not for the first time, how someone like Jules had become such an important part of his life.

Tom was sitting on his balcony, nursing a cup of coffee and basking in the rare glory of a peaceful morning. No script rewrites. No co-parenting emergencies. Just him, a slightly overcast sky, and the knowledge that he didn’t have to pretend to like kale today. Then his phone buzzed.

He glanced at the screen. Leo.

Tom smirked and answered, already bracing himself. Leo never called without an agenda. “Morning, DiCaprio. To what do I owe this honor? Did a yacht spring a leak?”

Leo’s laugh came through the line. “Funny. No, I wanted to talk about something, or, rather, someone.”

Tom took a sip of his coffee, narrowing his eyes. “If this is about me joining another climate fundraiser where I have to dress like a tree, I...”

“No, no” Leo interrupted, his tone suspiciously casual. “It’s about Jules.”

Tom froze, the cup halfway to his mouth. “Jules?” He cleared his throat, aiming for nonchalance but hitting more of a confused parrot. “What about her?”

“I like her” Leo said simply, as though he were announcing he’d found a new favorite oat milk. “She’s smart, funny, doesn’t take any of your crap, and let’s face it, Tom, that’s a short list.”

Tom squinted at the horizon, trying to process. “Wait, you like her? As in, you want to...” He gestured vaguely at the air, even though Leo couldn’t see him. “....ask her out?”

“Why not?” Leo said, like he’d just suggested ordering takeout. “She’s got a great vibe. And let’s be honest - she’s too cool to just hang out with you.”

Tom blinked. “Charming. Thanks.”

“Look, man, I’m serious. I think I’d like to take her out for a drink, get to know her a bit more. Do you think she’d go for it?”

For a moment, Tom said nothing. His brain was playing some sort of emotional pinball, bouncing between.... Jules? And Leo? And wait, why does this bother me? It didn’t make sense. Jules was Jules, his sharp-tongued, no-nonsense friend who once threatened to start a rumor that Tom was secretly writing a one-man musical about the life of a middle-aged goldfish who dreams of becoming a Broadway star.

“She’s… not really the dating-for-sport type” Tom said finally. “But hey, what do I know? You should probably just ask her yourself.”

Leo chuckled. “Fair enough. But maybe slip me her number? Just to break the ice?”

Tom hesitated, his thumb hovering over the send button like it was a detonator. Was this a good idea? Probably not. Was he going to stop Leo? Also probably not.

“Fine” he said with a sigh. “But if she stabs you with a cocktail stick, that’s on you.”

“Noted” Leo said, his grin practically audible. “Thanks, man. I owe you.  I'd like to call right away, but I don't want it to seem like I care too much. Do you think I should wait, like, a few days?”

“Yeah, whatever.” 

Leo. Of all people.

[pynkricee]

Permanent Red Stain: Redamancy

Chapter 8

(Warning: strong sexual themes: soft sex, sensitive choso, rough choso, emotional break. Kissing. Yandere Choso.)

Art by Ein Ruji on X

“Damn bitch.. don't scratch it..”

“I'm not damn..” I replied to Dhay as I pulled the sleeve to my shirt over my wrist that covered my fresh tattoo. “It's just so annoying..”

“It's supposed to be. You act like you haven't gotten a damn tattoo before..” Dhay was always too straight forward even when the matter didn't call for it. This was one of the main reasons why Sugu couldn't stand her.

It was Wednesday morning and Saturday was Dhay’s birthday. She had already rented out Frida's for Saturday night and the guest list was pretty decent. From my understanding, it was more of close friends, family and I believed she had mentioned some co-workers were going to possibly be there as well. I was really excited for her because she was a hard worker and she deserved some time to really just enjoy herself. To be her older sister, I was extremely proud of her.

We had met up at Starbucks for our usual morning coffee and chit-chat for the week. I was off work for the rest of the week and lucky Luri was still at school at the moment, so this was a perfect opportunity for us to catch up.

“So, are you going to finally bring this “Lover boy Kamo” to the party Saturday night right? You've been so giddy lately I would think my older sister was so called in love.” She asked, pulling the Chai latte down from her lips and placing her small cup on the table. I could tell she wanted me to spill every detail about Choso and she had already asked me multiple times to make sure I didn't forget to bring him to her party.

“I'm not in love…” I replied as I then sipped my strawberry infused water I had ordered on the side.

“Come on now. Who do you think you're foolin? The man gave you a tattoo for the free! Let alone made sure his shop was completely isolated for you so no one would disturb y'all. You must think im stupid?”

I couldn't help but chuckle a little bit as I moved the strands of hair from vision with my fingertips.

“Plus.. the night you left Frida's, I talked to Suguru..” The pause she gave me after saying this really made my nerves turn in a way like there was something else she really wanted to say.

I pulled my cup down from my lips covered in the strawberry lip gloss Cho bought me since he loved the way it tasted. “What about him? Y'all talk all the time…”

“He loves you..”

“Okay.. I love him too.”

“Go..” Her voice started to shift in tone while she got quiet, moving her cup off to the side.

“....he ‘Really’ loves you baby girl.”

I sat back in my chair, as I stretched my neck out on the palm of my hand. I then let out a faint giggle, as the smirk still stained my lips.

“Come on Dhay.. We've already talked about this numerous times already love. So why don't you tell me what you're wearing to the party so I can know what to bring to the table?” I tried my best to avoid this conversation every time she brought it up to me and I could tell from her shaking her head at me at this moment that I was over it. It's not that I didn't want to hear what SuGu had to say, it's just that if he had something to say I would rather hear it from the horse's mouth itself. But if I had to be honest with myself, there was nothing to talk about. SuGu and I already knew where our boundaries stood with one another.

Dhay sat back and let a slight sigh release from her lips as slid her phone off the table into her hand to show me pics. “Well, nevermind. I wanted to show you but I'll let it be a surprise.” She replied all sassy like, as she smacked her loud ass lips. I couldn't help but roll my eyes as I brought my cup back up to my own. “But you have to promise I'll meet your lover boy Saturday night at the party right? I want to get to know this fella that has my sister's panties in a bundle! Are you seeing him today since you have some time off?”

Now that she asked me that, I really didn't know. I wanted to spend the next couple of days catching up on some me time while Luri was in daycare during that day. Cho actually planned to pick me up Saturday night and we'd arrive at the party together.

I pulled my phone out to look at the time making sure I was staying on schedule for what I had planned today before I picked up my daughter. “I didn't plan on seeing Cho today until the night of the party, but I'll definitely be hitting him up.” I replied with a slight smirk on my face as I noticed the message he just sent me.

(Good morning Riceey, I hope you have an amazing morning with your sister. I miss you already. -Love, Your Cho Cho.)

“Mhmmmm that must be him..?” Dhay sassed as my fingers clicked my phone replying to the text.

I could feel my face flush completely as I sat my phone face down on the table. “....Maaaaybe..”

“Well.. I can't wait to meet him. It seems like he really makes you happy and that's all that matters. As long as he treats you and my niece right, I have no issues. But if he hurts you…I'm fucking him up!”

I instantly rolled my eyes. “You sound like fuckin SuGu…”

“Ha!! Nah.. Suguru sounds like me.”

It was nice actually getting to spend some time with my sister this morning. I used to get those days where I could feel so overwhelmed, but lately that's very become seldom. Plus I'll admit I did miss Choso and I wanted to see him tonight but we both agreed I needed some time to just focus on myself since Toji would have Luri after tonight. When it comes to him, I can agree that we may not always get along, but I appreciated him truly when he would come through for our daughter's sake.

About an hour had passed since I made it home. I kicked back and relaxed, grabbing a good book to read while boiling me some hot water to make my sweet green tea. It honestly felt pleasing just to bask in quietness for a couple hours until it was time for me to pick up Luri. It was refreshing, almost intoxicating in a good way. I knew Choso was off for the day at the daycare because he was having a preview at his tattoo shop this afternoon. He was opening shop on his own this morning with his younger brother Yuji until Gojo came in to help him later in the evening.

I was really proud of him. His shop was doing so well and he was making a name for himself not just out of town but in town as well.

After fixing a cup of hot tea and placing it on my coffee table, I pulled my thick mini blanket over my body and relaxed on the couch until the timer on my phone went off to leave.

It was Wednesday Review Day at the Cho-Hold.

Usually on this day, we open the shop a few hours early to present the new tattoos we designed ourselves and sell them for a discounted price. It was usually a pretty good profit for all designs we sell and most of the time we usually stayed packed throughout the day. So today I was absolutely sure we would be busy until we closed around eight o'clock tonight.

I opened the shop early this morning around eight am to make sure I restocked every needle and ink cartridge at each station. Since I was the main owner of the shop, I took pride to make sure everything was set up properly on Preview Day. Now this was an event that took place once every month. We had people come in from all over town and we of course were a big hit with all of the women and foreigners. So we made sure we always kept a good reputation with all of the locals as well so they always felt welcomed.

It was already nine-thirty am and I had about an hour before I had to open the shop for the Preview. I was expecting Yuji to follow in around this time as well and get his station ready for his usual customers. Gojo on the other hand wouldn't be here until later on in the evening to help close up shop after I left.

The plan was to stay until closing, but I really wanted to see Go tonight. I know we were supposed to wait until her sister's party to meet up, but I wanted to stop by her home tonight and surprise her with my presence.

It almost felt desperate of me because she was the only thing on my mind since I woke up this morning.

Around nine-forty five, all the preparations were finally finished for me to get ready to open the shop and begin the morning with our previews. I held my wrist up glancing at my watch wondering why Yuji was running late. He was usually on time but then again he did just have finals and I knew he had been fuckin exhausted the previous days. But when it came to inking he was always in the right state of mind.

“I hope he's on time today because I'm really going to need him..” I whispered to myself as I bit my bottom lip throwing away a damp paper towel on the trash behind my station.

A few moments later I heard a car pull up so I tilted my head back to look out the window of the class door to see if it was a customer or Yuji, but it wasn't.

“The fuck?” I whispered as I squinted my eyes harshly as they watched out the door,I noticed a 24 Red Jeep Cherokee pull up and park outside the shop. It was too early for customers but the thing is.. I noticed this car. It couldn't be…

I walked to the door placing my hand on the lock wondering if I should open it or not. Out stepped Destiny Val. My ex from almost two years ago. She stood 5’6, thick with long dark honey blonde hair that she dyed on a regular occasion. She was African American and Trinidad and she liked to smear her background in other women's faces thinking she was better than them. She had became very toxic at the end of our relationship to the point that I had to cut all ties with her. She was that one ex who was amazing in bed, but always started unnecessary drama from being insecure. And that's the shit I couldn't tolerate. Let alone even be near.

I watched as she walked up to the door. Licking her lips with a feral smile that caught the side of her mouth. My hand still on the lock as I met her eyes while she placed her hand on the glass.

“Hey Kamo..” She giggled as my eyes trailed with her finger tips sliding down the glass and back up to her gaze.

“Val….Can I help you?”

“Hey Kamo. How have you been?” She whispered in a delicate voice almost like she wanted something. I knew this side of her too well, so why the fuck are you here?

I looked up at the clock on the wall to keep my sight from her as much as I could, as my hand still sat on the lock wondering if I should open it or not. “If you're here for preview day, it doesn't start for another forty….” But before I could finish she cut me off…

“...I'm not, here for preview day. I was here to see you.”

“What for Val?” I asked, my voice more stern as my eyes darkened. “What do you need to talk about?”

She slowly stepped back from the door as she clutched one hand in the other, biting her lip as if something was really the matter with her thinking process.

“I.. I just .. wanted to see you. We didn't end on good terms and I've been thinking about you a lot.” I could hear her breath catch in her throat as she spoke. And she was right, we didn't end on good terms. It was more like an emotional Rollercoaster with no healing granted. That's one thing I regretted the most about the relationship. But what made it worse was that it wasn't one of those short lived relationships. We were together for a while, plus the fact that we didn't end it in peace. I wasn't the type of person to end things on bad terms with anyone. It was just too much drama for me. A beautiful woman who didn't know how to act right.

I took a deep breath, thinking about my options because at this point I felt naive that it would just be a short conversation. Maybe something would finally be resolved.

Maybe….

“Fine… you have fifteen minutes to say what you need to say. Then you have to leave.” I replied turning the lock til I heard a click. I could see a wide spiral grin hit her lips from each end as she continued to suck on her bottom lip. Which I noticed was the same habit as Riceey, but Riceey was more adorable.

“Thank you Kamo..” she whispered as she walked past me as I pulled the door open, letting her in. Her Ralph Lauren Blue perfume, hitting my nose as she walked by, and me closing the door, locking it behind her.

She knew that was my favorite perfume on her for the simple fact I had picked it out myself. I turned around to see her walking towards my station, slowly resting her ass on my seat, as she sat her phone next to her making herself comfortable.

I slowly walked and stood a little distance from her, crossing my arms and leaned up against the large tattoo stand that was mounted on the wall behind me.

“So… What's up Val..”

“I just wanted to talk to you..”

“Well.. you have the floor. So speak.” I answered, gesturing my hand out for her to begin then slipped it back under my arm.

I could see her getting nervous like she got caught up in her emotions and now didn't know what to say.

She swopped her hair behind her small ears and looked up making eye contact with me. Her hazel eyes captured mine as her breath began to quicken. “I'm sorry how things ended with us. I… I really didn't want things to end like that with us.. Cho….I..”

“Don't call me that..” I replied, interrupting her.

“Why not? I used to call you that all the time. What's different about me saying it now?”

“You said it right the first time. ‘USED’ to. We aren't together anymore.”

She slightly sneered her nose up from my remark but she knew I was right. That ship sailed long ago.

Her body language started to loosen up a bit as she sat on my chair. She was getting more and more comfortable as if she had more to say and get off her chest.

“Look Val.. I hate how things ended too. I agree, but all I can say is I'm sorry for what happened. I really am and I hope this little meeting or whatever you want to call it can give you closure, but I have to open up my shop soon.” I leaned off the table, tying my hair up with a tie that was around my wrist as I began to walk past her to let her out.

“Is it because.. of the girl you're with now?” With those words I instantly stopped next to my seat, my eyes piercing down into her gaze.

My tone started to become more serious as my breath became heated. “What about her?”

“Nothing Choso.” She quickly stood up from off the seat and walked over to me. Her finger tips caressing the back of my shoulder from one end to the next until she stood in front of me. Looking up into my gaze.

“What about her?” I asked again. My voice becoming angrier than before. At this point I was trying to keep my cool because for one how did she know about KyiGo? Pictures haven't been posted of us anywhere. Maybe someone she knew saw us out together? That was the only other option I could think of.

“Like I said, nothing Cho.” She replied as her index finger slowly began to run down my chest, capturing the curve of my muscles that were outlined under my shirt.

With a reflex my hand snapped up and grabbed her wrist. “Stop.”

“Why?”

“Look, you came to say what you had to say. I think it's time for you to leave.”

I could feel the heat from her breath as she reached her face closer to skin. She quickly brushed her lips across mine before I had a chance to react. I turned my head, squeezing her hand harder at this point not even caring if I hurt her or not.

“You..Need To Leave. NOW!” I said to her sternly as I looked down into her eyes, my body trembling with anger trying to control my emotions as much as I could at this point. The feeling of not just rage from me, but pure lust I could feel coming from her.

Using my body I began to push her to the door as I still had her wrist in my hand.

“Come on Choso.. let me go! I came here to tell you…I Still Love You!”

“BULLSHIT!” I replied, throwing her wrist down to her side. “You only love yourself. You came over here knowing damn well I had a girl. So what was all this about wanting to talk? Getting shit off YOUR CHEST?” I began to suck my teeth in at the fact I was losing control of my anger so quickly and the fact, I was feeling emotions that I used to feel when I argued with Val.

She slowly started to walk back towards me. Her hands cupped my face. “Choso…please listen.”

I grabbed both of her wrists with both hands trying to remove her hands from around my face but she wouldn't budge and I knew I couldn't use my force without really hurting her. This is what she did to get my attention, but this time I could feel her digging her nails into my scalp.

Her face began to move closer to mine. I couldn't feel her breath twitching as my nails dug into the skin of her wrist.

“Val.. let me go…” I said in a low tone, looking deep into her eyes. Her eyes.. the eyes that used to make me angry with pure hatred and joy. “Let.. me go.” I whispered avoiding her gaze as much as I possibly could.

“I cant..” Her eyes began to tear up, trailing a line on black mascara down her cheeks as she began to cry. “I still love you.”

“No you don't Val..”

“YES” ..Yes I do..Kamo…“I still think about you everyday. Everyday is torture. I know I fucked up but..” She replied. My breath hitched as her lips quickly captured mine.

“St..Stop Val..” I replied breathing into her mouth, trying to move my face to the side but I felt as if my body couldn't move anymore. I felt weak. I was weak.

I could feel her tongue flood my mouth, catching the back of my teeth as my grip on her wrist became fierce. Her grip around my face now trailed to the back of my head catching the tangle in my ponytail.

“I.. I cant stop.” She responded breathing in my mouth. My lips hungrily moving with hers as I closed my eyes, feeling all the emotions pour into me that I used to feel when I was with her. Her taste, her hunger for me.

I could feel the kiss start to deepen as her tongue hit the back of my throat, my hands started to travel from her wrist to her shoulders, all the way to the small of her back. But It was the moan she sounded off that broke me out of my trance.

I broke the kiss, removing my hands from her back as I lifted them up to the side of my head, as I took a step back.

(I Fucked Up)

“Choso?”

“You need to leave.”

“But.. Cho..”

I quickly walked past her, unlocking the door and swung it open avoiding all eye contact with her.

“Fine then , I'll go” I could sense the smug look she had across her face as she tried to reach for my face one last time before walking out.

“Tch..” I turned my head to the side avoiding my eyes from meeting hers as she finally walked out the door.

As her steps sounded off I swung the door shut but it was caught by an arm that reached in to catch it.

“Yuji..”

“Was that Val?” He questioned as he walked in, locking the door behind him.

FUUCK!!

[binchansbiceps]

I Have Been Playing With A Superstar Chapter 2

The months had seemed to fly by and drag on at the same time. A. didn’t play with you much anymore as he said he had to work on this project for the meetings he had to travel for. But at least he did message you when he could. Mini was now super excited cause Stray kids just announced that they would be going on tour. She was trying to convince you to save and go with her and you were trying to do your best but life was never easy for that. You had always made just enough to pay rent, buy groceries, and every once in a while get something for yourself. Paying for really expensive concert tickets was sadly not in the realm of possibility. Especially with the short time frame that's been given for when the concert is.

It’s not that you didn’t want to go, cause you really did. Stray Kids was the first group you really got into. Hell you had gotten two tattoos for Stray Kids one for the first album you had ever heard and the second for your favourite song. And you hadn’t been listening to them for very long. You had actually gotten them done only three to four months in. So it was safe to say that you were a Stay. 

Not overly crazy, you watched the lives and their posts on youtube, you thought about getting Bubble but the cost was a little too much. And anytime you heard about the fans stalking them and trying to get close to them by force just made you mad and disgusted. Though you do have to admit, to simping a bit yourself even reading some fanfics and maybe writing one or two as well.

 It’s kinda one thing you and A. bonded over, though not just Stray kids but Ateez, NCT, Twice, Black Pink and a few others he had actually gotten you into. You were a bit surprised he liked K-pop as most people you met didn’t seem to really understand the whole you can enjoy music in other languages that you don’t understand cause you don’t speak them… thing. 

So happy to say you had met someone who did, and all on your own made you very happy. Most of your K-pop friends came from Mini when she had dragged you into liking the music. For the second time as the first you had only listened to for a few weeks before losing interest and forgetting all about it.

Enjoying your day off laying in bed and listening to a random shuffle of all your music on your phone.  A. sent you a message.

Hey!! - A.

Hey hows the project going?? - Y/U/N

Its going pretty well! Super excited to present it - A.

Thats good - Y/U/N So what day are you getting here do you know yet?? - Y/U/N

Yeah we just got a confirmed date for arrival - A. It’s in 2 weeks on tuesday - A.

Ohh thats soo awesome i can’t wait!! - Y/U/N When is best for you to meet up i know this coffee shop nearby or we can find one in between if your a little further away - Y/U/N

We are staying in a hotel near the city but i will have a driver so i can disappear for a few and we should all be good so close by you works well and tuesday afternoon should work for me - A.

Sounds great ill send you the address and ill meet you there!! - Y/U/N

Ok im super excited!! - A. I need to go back to work now but ill see you in a few weeks!! - A.

Okay have fun! - Y/U/N

With the new knowledge you were even now more excited and hoping to be able to meet up more than once before he would have to go home. But since you didn’t know his full schedule and how long he was staying, the one time with him was good enough. 

Besides now that he was ready to meet up you could call and facetime now so that’s even more exciting. 

You immediately tell Mini you knew she would want to know when and where you were meeting him. You know it was to keep you safe. She wasn’t going to come with you but she wanted to know when and where you were at all times. And you couldn’t fault her for that, you would do the same for her if the roles were reversed, and it was she who’s meeting up with some ‘rando’ she had been talking to for just over a year and had never even seen a photo of. 

The day finally came, it was time to go and meet A. at the cafe. You picked a nice T-shirt and some leggings and some nice flats to go with. Adding some mascara, leaving the rest of your face blank as you never like the feel of wearing makeup, it’s too heavy and makes your face feel itchy. 

You grab the mini backpack you use as a purse and make your way out the door. Leaving a little too early, as always the fear of being late is what powers you into always being about an hour early to things.

Taking the short bus ride and getting off at your stop you head to the little cafe and find a place to sit for the two of you and set your things down. Pulling out your phone you let Mini know you are now at the cafe and wait for him to get there. She told you to keep her posted and to tell her if you go anywhere else and when you get home. Agreeing to her terms you let out a nervous yet excited breath and went up to the cash to grab something to nibble on while you waited.

 Playing cats&soup while nibbling every once in a while, you didn’t pay attention to the ring of the bell when the door opens or how the person who just walked in took a quick look around before walking in your direction. You didn’t see how they stopped beside the table and removed their face mask. What did catch your attention though was when they said in a very familiar voice “hello your Y/U/N right?” when you looked up you couldn’t believe who stood in front of you and all you could muster to say was “ALYFT?”

[theoneandonlyneonleon]

I am not patient so ima answer these now

ask game

1. whats your favorite thing in your room?: my turtle wall <333

2. how tall do you wish you were?: much taller 😔

3. what color is your hair?: im a natural redhead :D

4. whats a rare fear that you have?: nit rlly rare i dont think, but I am TERRIFIED of deep water- like to the point of crying

5. are you single?: naur✨

6. has your heart ever been broken?: not really?

7. what was your favorite thing as a kid?: 2012 and Money Island SE

8. favorite coping mechanism?: Loud music and a weighted blanket 👌

9. whats your favorite love language?: defo physical touch. I am a veryyyy clingy person oncw I get comfy

10. how often do you get nervous?: really only before auditions (and ordering food)

11. if you had three wishes, would you use them?: uh- cha. Who wouldn't??

12. if you could be fluent in any language which one would it be?: asl fs. I like being non verbal, so it would be helpful

13. where do you wish to live?: I wish I lived with my aunt and uncle in Everett

14. what’s something surprising about you?: I do cheer

15. when did you last shower?: last week I think? (I am ass at taking care of myself 💀💀)

16. when did you first join tumblr?: A couple months ago (I think)

17. do you want any tattoos? if so, where, what, and why?: yerp. Probably my arms. Something meaningful. Idk it just sounds cool.

18. whats the most prominent dream youve had?: A reoccurring dream I keep having is where my mom lets me go to school for one day to try it out, but something always goes wrong (I lose my schedule, miss my classes, etc.)

19. whats your dream job?: Actor/Voice Actor

20. whats your ideal date?: just doing something easy and fun, like going to the aquarium!

21. what do you wish you could do better?: take care of myself

22. what country would you live in if you could?: idk Canada? I mean they get free healthcare-

23. whos the best person you know?: my brother Asher

24. have you ever walked into something you shouldnt have?: I didn't, but my mom once walked in on my neighbor teaching me the wap when I was like 9

25. Already answered!!

26. when have you been most embarrassed?: I accidentally blew snot in the boy I liked in 3rd grade✨✨

27. whats your favorite halloween costume?: so far, Carrie

28. what are you best at?: Acting

29. do you know how to tie your shoes?: yuh

30. do you have siblings?: three- almost four- little s shits

31. if you could know one thing about the future what do you wanna know?: if i make it to adulthood

32. whats a dealbreaker for you?: dishonesty

33. whats your favorite current class?: ELA

34. how many people have you dated?: 4

35. how often do you wash your hair?: every time I shower

36. do you daydream? what about?: living w my aunt and uncle

37. where do you go to be alone?: my room. people kinda forget I exist lol

38. which parent do you like more?: my dad. They both suck, but he's at least a little better

39. whats the one standard you hold yourself to?: not being hateful

40. whos voice do you enjoy?: BEN SCHWARTZ!!!!

41. if you could announce one thing to the world what would it be?: bingus

42. whats one thing you wanna do but havent yet?: actually learn an instrument (I am learning drums tho!)

43. what do you wish you never did?: came out to my friends in the gc where my ma could see

44. do you believe in life after death?: sort of? Im pretty open to whatever, but I do like the idea of reincarnation

45. do you prefer book over movie?: the book is definitely 100% better than the movie

46. whats your favorite season?: Autumn

47. Answered!!

48. do you have a beloved stuffed animal?: yup! Pussyslayer the turtle <333

49. whens a time you wish you acted differently?: 3rd grade when I drove a friend away by being to crazy

50. what’s something you wish that you never bought?: nothing really, I thoroughly make sure the purchase is worthwhile before proceeding

51. do you have your own room?: sadly, no

52. whats your favorite book?: white rabbit

53. who’s someone you hate?: Colleen Hoover

54. whats your best hottake?: ???

55. whats your favorite game?: I don't really play video games, but I'd say either Minecraft, Unpacking, or Sims 4

56. whens a time you felt real genuine fear?: when I went to twin falls in Hawaii, and my dad swam me across the third one, under the waterfall. I cried.

57. are you a morning person?: aaaaabsolutely not

58. do you drink enough water?: definitely not.... Im very dehydrated

59. how different are you from the little kid you used to be?: Ion know dawg- i cant even remember most my childhood 😭😭

60. do you enjoy tumblr?: yeah! I just wish people would rebLOG INSTEAD OF LIKING.

61. have you ever had a tumblr experience that made you wanna delete the app?: No(t yet)

62. whats your least favorite game?: fortnite

63. were you a markiplier fan?: still am motherfucker

64. how do you respond to compliments?: If its in person, I usually just say thanks and give a compliment in return. If its online, I usually squeal and giggle and stimm big before calmly replying 'ik✨✨' or 'ty!!'

65. whats something that would make you fall in love?: literally no idea

66. do you believe in marriage?: im kinda 50/50 here- on one hand I would love to have a wedding and get to wear a pretty dress. On the other, I don't believe in marriage as an idea- I feel like you shouldnt have to be legally bound to prive your love. But you do you boo <33

67. do you have a crush on someone?: other than Donnie? Nah.

68. do you like tumblr?: I do! So far everyone is really nice (but please for the love of Aphrodite REBLOGGGG)

69. were you a voltron stan?: naur

70. whats your favorite ship?: Leosagi

71. whats your favorite song?: atm im between Two Time by Jack Stauber and the entire Lucid Dreams album by Boywithuke

72. do you like loud crowds?: I would honestly rather be skinned alive

73. have you ever created conflict on purpose?: nah

74. how do you sleep?: very little

75. do you bite your lips?: only when they itchy

76. do you use chapstick?: frequently. I have eczema so my lips are constantly dry

77. do you have any pets?: two dogs and three cats!

78. what color are your eyes?: blue-gray

79. what’s something you wish you could change about yourself?: nothing, im perfect already✨✨

80. have you ever had surgery?: nerp

81. whats your least favorite animal?: mosquito

82. whats something that youre really bad at?: math (I had to use my fingers to count 7-3 the other day, then I had to pause and rethink my entire life)

83. do you have an sqishmellows?: just one, the lil panda

84. do you enjoy fast food?: meh. I prefer eating at home

85. do you like soda?: yup!

86. Answered!!

87. do you wear any jewelry?: mhm! I have a bunch if cute earrings, and I love wearing bracelets

88. what socials do you use?: just Insta and tumblr

89. whats your lowest grade in school right now?: social studies at 73.24%

90. whats the latest youve stayed up till?: all night

91. did you ever have bangs?: Nerp

92. what trends did you hate?: thigh high uggs because for some reason those were a thing

93. whats your favorite item of clothing?: the dress I wore today, so affectionately called the 'coffin dress'

94. Answered!!

95. whats your opinion on body hair?: if you want to shave, go ahead. If you dont, thats okay too! I don't like telling people what to do with their bodies. Personally, I don't like shaving. I like me the way I am, body hair and all!

96. whats your least favorite time?: morning

97. do you make a wish at 11:11?: its basically mandatory in my house

98. Answered!!

99. have you ever been to church?: I don't go regularly, but have been a few times. Not a terrible experience, but not for me.

100. are you lgbtq?: queer as hell baby

[daiseukiis]

SHARE A THOT ABOUT F/Os

i have no idea what you're talking about bestie

EDIT OH I AM SO DUMB

RE-EDITNG AND ADDING JSDFW

kaiser - i actually started liking this stupid koolaid hair dipped man because of a few smaus. yk those like scenerios of like 1/2 ss yea... fell for him there. i dont even know why i have so much appeal to him, probably because he's s smug cocky little shit and his tattoos honestly get me. but still, that little ass needs to be humbled and i am here all for it ;)

despite me and him like being so suffocatingly flirtly with him that almost everyone hates it, they also appreciate the times that i am the only one that can smack his stupid ass up right again and humble him. he really does listen to me, and he most likely admires my determination and super blunt ass lol. before games he makes sure to kiss me, he thinks it a good luck charm. we play pass sometimes, though i'm not any good at football he still enjoys playing with me ( or so he says he does ). he remembers the small things surprisingly, how i love the colour purple and though not into dresses, loves buying ones with blue roses ( ironically enough, a very pale or royal shade of blue rlly suits me so if he sees it he's buying it ) and he lets me use his card to go shopping!

kise - i cannot get this dumb blonde idiot out of my head like what the actual fuck. when i saw him i'm like oh he's pre cut, but omg the more scenes of him i ended up liking him and how determined he is. esp that scene of kasamatsu telling him off, this guy also needs to be humbled. i rlly liked his character development and i like how it shows that kise isn't just some 'good guy' everyone says he is. also, this bitch has been nerfed so many times in the anime like ??? HE IS UNSTOPPABLE HE ISTG THE STRONGEST GOM AND THEN BOOM INJURED.

me and kise is me turning down his flirtyass sometimes haha, he needs to be humbled like kaiser! he is another that most likely admires me for my attitude. i'm no gom player like him, nor am i like outstandingly amazing at ball, we play tgtr and this stupid asshole never lets me win! i give him pointers since i used to coach, he absolutely loves my dedication to the sport lol. i hate how he teases me, regardless of my competitive dancing background could not for the love of me survive dance dance rev. i hate him for that. we go shopping tgtr and when we go out we're lwk matching ! he dresses me up, i dress him up. he takes me to his modelling gigs sometimes and when they need an extra i model w him :3

sting - my first anime crush ! the owner of my heart, kise, kaiser and everyone else be renting ! ( real ! ) literally would melt again in his presence. pre gmg sting was such an asshole, like he was michael kaiser asshole it is so astonishing. but he actually does care a lot though under that masked cocky crop top he's always in. istg when lector disappeared and he cried for him back rlly stung, and i love how he cares so much about other post gmg !!! like omg, i could fall to my knees im so in love with him it's so crazy.

i would nag at him to do his guild work, because as guild master he really needs to get his shit together or else we can't go on jobs tgtr. he sucks at cooking, so i'm the one who cooks for him; depending on how busy he is doing paper work i'll feed him too! always pecks me a kiss if he has to go on a mission and will always come back with souvenirs for me. he's a bit forgetful, but i can see that he makes up for it for surprise dates, lots of cuddles and kisses.

[moony-sweaters]

i want to be more, and i don’t know how to explain it.

i want to be the girl laying under an open window in paris, dark purple hair reading Camus and sipping her tea. the man she was with last night lay asleep next to her, she’s almost sure she knows his name, she’s in love with him, she’ll forget him when he leaves, the only trace of his sliver of her life being the impression in the pillow next to her and the faint smell of his cologne, both will be gone by night. she won’t miss any of them when she finds herself.

I want to be the mother in the grocery store, long soft brown hair, blue eyes. the baby boy on her hip has the same ones, he is learning to reach out for everything he sees, his eyes full of wonder his heart full of hope, and every time she looks at him she hopes that glow never goes away, she won’t notice the day it does but rather years later wishing she could have saved him from this world but hoping he can make it on his own anyways. he will thank her in the dedication of his first novel, he learned what love was from her kind eyes.

i want to be the blonde girl in the front row of a shitty little bar concert, her first legal drink in hand but she can shoot whiskey like it’s water—some things are truly an inherited trait—the smoky glitter falling off her eyes and when the bassist asks her back to his hotel room over a cigarette she won’t be surprised. she will continue this way until she finds the love of her life behind the bar of a show in San Diego three years later

i want to be the girl in his arms on the couch, they’re 20 and 22 and finally feel alive. she’s loved him since she was 14 and first saw him, but didn’t get to feel that love until she was 16 and they met again, she’s always known there was something tying them together, that’s why when she turned 18 they got red string tattoos, that’s why when he was 21 he asked her to marry him for the second time, the first time they were 16 and 17 laying in bed after a night out, he thought she was asleep, she almost started crying because she had never felt so entirely loved before, not for who she was. they will die together after a life full of love.

how am i supposed to continue on when i have so much love to give and no time to give it, how can i not just want to die from the sheer lack of time we are given, so the instinct to cut it short comes about so frequently i hardly acknowledge it anymore, im cooking and think about slitting my wrist half way through the meal, im driving to my loves house and can’t help the urge to crash so bad i don’t make it there, i go to take the meds to keep me alive and wish i could take the whole bottle. love makes us want to die. love is a gamble and the idea of losing it is worse than death, but love is the only reason we are alive, we could never make it without at least the fantasy of a feeling so good we may as well be a star exploding to create a new universe.

[something-tofightfor]

I HAVE MISSED THESE TWO A TON AND IM SO GLAD THEY'RE BACK AND THEY'RE HAPPY AND THRIVING AND TOGETHER AND EXPERIENCING NEW THINGS WITHOUT GIVING UP ON THEIR DREAMS AAAAAAAAAAAAAH.

starting out with the Smut Lite with dieter is always a good idea, and I love that not only was he willing to get up early even when he didn't have to ... he immediately put the time to good use.

Love that for him.

I think one of my favorite things about this pairing is that they've still got their separate lives. Yes, they live together and are very clearly together, but they're happy and doing their own thing. Dieter is more than capable of being on his own and living his own life, and a lot of people seem to forget that in favor of making him out to be someone that needs to be taken care of.

He's focused and attentive and talented and I just ... I love to see him stupid in love the way he is here.

She's very sneaky, but it's smart of her to work in a secret appointment in the middle of a legitimate trip. I also really love the symmetry of the whole tattoo experience; having the same artist doing it, filling in the missing pieces, keeping it a surprise ... it signifies how well these two compliment each other, and how well they know what to do to show the other how much they mean.

I would have been so sad to miss Dieter's opening night, but I understand that it had to happen - and like I told you before, there were certain things in this that I could see and hear in my head as I read this - the entire horned phone call was one, and the rolling over in bed was another. so damn well written, alyssa.

And the way these two deal with the tabloids reads really true to Dieter, too - he wouldn't normally care what people say about him, but when it impacts someone he loves, too? That's a different story, and he's going to do what he can to cut it off before it gets out of hand.

I love them so much it's stupid.

What Fools

June Drabbles 2022… in 2023  Days 16 & 25 - Flower Crown & Midsummer 

A/N: Better 365 days late than never, right? Hahahaha. This was the ONE AND ONLY one shot that I did not finish from last year’s June drabble challenge, and damnit I wasn’t going to let another whole June pass without giving this one its due. Dieter and Reader deserve it so here we are. This one takes place in the Bad Idea universe, after Vena Amoris. 

Word Count: 5, 636 

Warnings: language, brief smut, mention of needles/tattooing, stupid fucking tabloids, Dieter’s hair in the sunlight 

Summary: You have a gallery opening in L.A. Dieter has a part in a play in New York. You can’t be in two places at once, but you can do something to illustrate how important your relationship is - and how important it will always be.

You were already awake when your alarm sounded, the tingling chime mixing with the gravel of Dieter’s groan to draw a smile across your face. Good morning to you, too, Bravo. One of your hands came up to cover the arm that he’d flung heavily over you in an attempt to keep you in place while the other reached for your phone on the nightstand. Eyes still shut, you groped blindly until your fingers closed around the device and you let out a sigh. Time to start the day. 

Dieter had a different suggestion, though, and he gave it to you as you finally blinked yourself awake enough to silence your alarm, his arm snaking more tightly around your middle.

“Throw it out the fucking window.”  His lips were still pressed to the top of your shoulder, the skin there damp from the drag of his mouth and the flick of his tongue, which was what had actually woken you up. His warm breath combined with the low rumble of the words he spoke directly into your flesh sent a slow moving heat wave through your lower belly. The fact that you could feel him straining at his pajama pants, already half-hard, and not at all shy about it, only fueled the growing flame. 

Keep reading

[muniimyg]

42.5 | when will you

series m.list

taglist: @kakixaku @boraength @4ksj @pamzn @jinsearth @fancycollectormoon @weasleyswizarding-wheezes @fan-ati--c @kthlvr30 @ellesalazar @taeees-world @sukunasrealgf @firesighgirl @jeonninja @bloopkook @butterymin @pinkseokchim @joonsjuice

warnings: “ SMUTTTTTTT “🤭 half-assed slow burn mood,, angst angst angst !!!

note: well well well …… we’re back :p no cuz like …. me: im gonna take a break // me writing and posting at 5am: BE FUCKING FOR REAL ….

+

THIS IS UNEDITED 💔 i might come back and edit but also i’m OVER IT so take this written as u will 🤺pls send in asks !! i’d love to hear from u <3

Jungkook is a gentleman. 

He has and always has been the kind of guy to never forget your birthday, friendship anniversaries, or any other milestone that could fall into being a considerate man. He’s known to put your feelings before his. It comes to no one’s surprise when your needs are being met while his are being swept under the rug. Not to say that you neglect him! It’s simply that in terms of physical intimacy, there was not much he could hope for from you.

All his life, he did his best to respect you, your body, and your choices. Everything from your tattoos, piercings, and the way you dress; he loves. He has had heart eyes on you since you two were young and with each passing day, you became more and more ravishing. Not only did you make life beautiful—you were beautiful. 

Though Jungkook has never really had problems falling asleep, he’d often lay awake thinking about you. Lonely without you by his side, or simply after receiving a “goodnight, bhie” message from you; he would stay up and wonder when he would ever get to have you close to him.

He isn’t sure if it was sinful or deserving but every night you spend with him, laying side by side or cuddled together; he’d want more. So much more that it would have been too dangerous to simply ask. It would have been too tricky to put himself out there. Yet, it would be a lie if he said he never thought about getting you out of his system. 

As much as Jungkook loves you, he has never enjoyed being in love with you in the sense that a part of him has always felt like he would never truly have you.

After all, Jungkook is a man and as a man; it ached to know that the love of his life would never lewdly whimper his name. Uttering begging phrases, challenging him to fuck you so good; your eyes would roll back and your back would arch from the sensitivity he’d bring upon you. It saddened Jungkook to think that he would never get to watch you undress and fall on your knees for him… Or that he’d never get to watch you purse your addictive lips before wrapping them around his hard cock. It ruined him to think that he’d never know what it would feel like to be inside of you—never knowing the warmth and the closeness sex with you would bring...

Until now. 

You’ve seen Jungkook without a shirt before. 

Of course, you have. 

You’ve seen Jungkook’s hands before—veiny, thick, and tatted.

Of course, you have. 

But you have never seen the combination together. Especially not when he’s in between your legs. You’ve never felt the heat of his breath on your bare pussy. You’ve never felt his bulge against your ass up until 30 minutes ago when he began to undress you.

“Mhmphh—nghhh,” you moan, feeling yourself clench. 

Jungkook cocks his head up and watches you shakily breathe in and out. Your clothes are all off except for a shirt of his you have on. He wonders why it’s still on, but taking into account that he had the honour of undressing you… It’s whatever.

He almost lost his mind when you asked him to take off your panties—therefore, the shirt is the least of his worries. 

You arch your back, plopping on your elbows to get a better perspective. You’ve never been in this position with him before. It feels so nerve-wracking. At first, to be completely honest, you were insecure about him seeing you naked.

This is still Jungkook.

He has had his fair share of bodies and you can’t help but compare yourself to them. Even if it was only for a split second, it made you self conscious. Jungkook noticed it though. He noticed your body language tense up and opted to begin with easing your nerves.

Thus, him prepping you.

“Can you take one more?” Jungkook asks as he runs his thumb around your clit. He does it softly, hardly pressing on your skin. It makes you shiver, hating the way he’s playing with you. 

He already has two digits in. 

“A-another one? Why.. Why can’t I just have you now?”

Jungkook is a man.

Even if he wants to drag this moment with you out as much as he can—he can’t!

This is finally it.

This is you and him, being closer than ever. It brings him to such a high, he can’t think straight. He hopes he can fuck you the way he’s always wanted to. He hopes he can hold it out. He’s afraid he’ll give in and cave onto your body before you can finish.

Jungkook is never insecure about sleeping with someone either. This says a lot. He’s afraid he’ll finish first and not be able to satisfy you.

It makes him think of Jin.

Total boner killer, but he can’t help but compare himself to him. After all, it was you that was after Jin all this time. It’s not like Jungkook needs the details, but maybe he should have found out what made you so addicted to sleeping with Jin.

Was it the way he ate you out?

Was it the way he’d fuck you so good that you’d be whimpering his name with teary eyes?

Jungkook wants to know and also doesn’t.

He wants to know for his benefit and tries to convince himself he feels indifferent when it comes to you and Jin.

You and Jin.

Jungkook isn’t too sure what happened between you two at the hospital, but the selfish part of him celebrates and thanks Jin for bringing you here. It’s not like Jungkook is out here to take advantage of you—let’s remember: it was you that came to him.

That came onto him.

Jungkook finds comfort in that.

He then nods, stretching over to kiss your stomach. He removes his fingers from inside of you and then grips your sides. You let out a small giggle from his touch and watch as he shifts his position. Now, towering over you, you take your time to look at him and his body. 

You were there when he got his sleeve tattooed. You’re usually the one to see him after his gym workouts as well. His tattoos, his chest, his body—all of it is nothing new to you… Yet, in this moment it feels entirely foreign. 

You’re in awe. 

He’s so handsome. 

You’ve always known it, but you’ve never really thought about it. 

Jungkook thinks you’re so pretty under him like this. 

He’s only ever dreamed about this moment. 

Closing in on you, he leans in to kiss your neck. You let out a breathy moan as he gently drops his body on top of yours, dragging his hard cock on top of your bare pussy. He still has his boxers on and the fabric spills his secret earlier than he would have liked it to. You don’t say anything partly because you aren’t sure if it’s your own wetness from him literally fingering you for the past twenty minutes and partly because… Well, isn’t this what’s supposed to happen when you have sex?

With your best friend?

A part of you also feels so unsure about everything. You’re trying your best to bite your tongue and simply let this happen. You want this to happen. You need a distraction—you need healing.

Well then, isn’t this it? 

It’s Jungkook. 

It has to be Jungkook. 

His kisses travel from your neck to your cheek. You take in his scent, and for the first time; it hits you.

This is really close.

Even when you hug him, his scent has never been more prominent until now. Now that he’s practically naked and on top of you. 

“You okay?” Jungkook murmurs, lifting his head to look at you. You nod and smile at him warmly. He attempts to return with the same smile but fails as his smile beats yours. He looks at you lovingly. Jungkook takes this moment to tuck your hair behind your ear and breathe you in. 

He can’t believe this. 

God, you’re so beautiful.

“Are you sure… Are you sure you want to do this?” 

Your lips twitch and your tummy turns. “Y-yeah, of course,” you reassure him. “We’ve come this far.”

Before he can protest, you wrap your arms around him and spread your legs from underneath. He feels you do so and he hisses in response. He won’t last long. Not only is he incredibly horny, but you are just so fucking irresistible. 

Jungkook lifts his hips and you reach over to the band of his boxers. You tug it down as Jungkook scrunches a handful of the shirt you’re wearing in his hands and pushes it up and over your head. You lower your chin as he takes the shift off entirely. 

Bare. 

His eyes flutter to your exposed breasts. 

This is it.

You’re naked under him. 

“Take it off,” you remind him. 

Jungkook smirks, almost forgetting that you hadn’t finished undressing him. “No please?”

“Please… For me?”

“Anything for you.”

If Jungkook thought his heart fluttered around you before—his heart is definitely fluttering now. This flutter goes all the way to the pit of his stomach. It feels like he’s going on overdrive. Like, if he could combust right now—he would. 

He lifts his hips again, letting you tug his boxers down as far as you could. He does the rest. When they’re off, he flings them to the floor as he did with your shirt. He plops to one elbow as he uses his other hand to grab his cock. He watches himself pump his length against your heat. Then, he looks up at you the moment a moan escapes your lips. 

His gaze lowers.  

Your lips. 

He wants to kiss you before this begins. 

“Bhie,” he calls for you. You hum in response. “Kiss me.”

Bhie. 

You tilt your chin up, biting your bottom lip as he leans in. Jungkook’s lips crash into yours for the first time since the hospital. They feel like how you remember them to feel like. He parts his mouth, giving you the opportunity to slip your tongue in. 

You don’t. 

Jungkook kisses you again, ignoring the awkward pause. 

But it happens again. 

He kisses again and just as you’re about to chase his lips—he pulls away. 

“W-wait—”

He stays silent, thinking of possible ways this will go. Should he voice out his concern right now and ruin the mood? Should he just continue and have you?

He says it anyway. “You didn’t kiss me back.”

Your eyes widen. 

“I was about to—”

“At the hospital. Here—now, you didn’t kiss me back.”

You shake your head, trying to deflate his claim. 

“Jungkook, we’re just getting started—”

“Are we?” he rejects your comfort. “This has been going on forever and it’s always the same fucking thing. ___, we exhaust the people around us. We exhaust each other.”

His words cut you deep.

Jungkook shifts to sit up. You follow, sitting up and bringing your knees to your chest. He looks at you and then lowers his gaze to look at his hands. These hands, that were just touching you not even a full minute ago… They feel so weird to him now. 

The feeling of guilt overwhelms you when you realize Jungkook isn’t talking about sex. He’s talking about the history of you two—how you two aren’t just getting started. This is the middle of your story. Silence fills the room as both of you take a breather. 

You’ve been in his room a million times. 

You’ve slept in this bed with him a million and one times. 

You’ve been alone with Jungkook a million and two times and for some odd reason; for the first time with him, you felt alone. 

You reach out to him. He looks at you and watches as you hesitate to solve this. It’s then, in your millisecond of dull passion, that Jungkook feels a sense of clarity.

Up until now… He’s only felt confusion. You showing up at his door right after Jin… Felt a little too rebound like. As desperate for your love as he is; he gave in when you begged for him to have you.

Yet, now… He feels different.

Guilt.

Hurt.

Betrayal.

If he really thinks about it, this is all going too fast. If you truly meant wanting him, you would have done this earlier or later—but not now.

Now is too grey.

Not even a day ago, he found out you were all set to leave him.

Now, you’re here?

Naked in his bed?

He was so set in convincing you to stay. He was set on forgiving you for keeping such a heavy secret from him and for having him run in circles when you were with Jin—but now he feels indifferent. Honestly, it’s because he hasn’t had the time to process it all yet.

What would change after this?

Would you change?

Would he?

“What am I doing, ___?” Jungkook breaks the silence with a heavy heart. “I have loved you with all that I am for as long as I can remember. I’ve made a lot of selfish decisions in the past, but this one… This beats them all.” 

You shake your head, not wanting him to feel like this was his fault. You gather his sheets to cover your body and move closer to him.

He stays still. 

“I want this,” you reassure him for the second time. You take a hold of his hands and bring them to your lips. Kissing them, you look at him with pleading eyes. Jungkook’s heart melts at your attempt but he takes his hands back from you. Your eyebrows furrow at the sudden change of mood. 

You take a breath in and try again. 

You fix Jungkook’s hair, moving the sweaty strands away from his face. You smile, satisfied when his face is more visible. His eyes gloss, heart beginning to break at the sight of you. Even when you hurt him, he would still find himself loving you more and more until he bleeds out all his resentment.

This is him bleeding.

“Don’t do that,” Jungkook begs, taking your wrists and pushing them away. He can’t believe he’s doing this. He can’t believe he’s asking the woman of his dreams to stop.

You sit up, confused why he’s suddenly pushing you away. “Do what?”

“This,” he gestures between you and him. “___, it’s so fucking painful loving you.”

You gulp, unsure of what to say or do. He has never spoken to you like this before.

“I want this,” you say softly, hoping he understands your sincerity. “I want you, Jungkook.”

He looks away, sharply taking a breath in before he turns back to you. His eyes are watery, something you rarely see with him. 

Jungkook never cries. 

“Bhie… As sick as it is; I’m okay with you using me.. But I’m not okay with me using you.” Jungkook confesses, “I want you but not like this. Not when you don’t want me the way I want you—when will you understand that I have always felt this way? You have given me hope so many times and now that our moment is finally here… I can’t take it. I can’t do this to you. I can’t do this to us.”

“I do want you,” you try to convince him. “What do I have to do for you to understand that? Get naked and have sex with you?” At this point, you begin to feel frustrated. Isn’t this what he wanted? Though you know it’s deeper than sex with Jungkook, you can’t help but feel offended. 

“I know you, ___.” 

“And I know you! Jungkook, I know it’s awkward right now but—”

“It’s not awkward,” he corrects you. “You think it’s awkward… That’s just it, bhie. It wasn’t and never is awkward with me. It was everything I dreamed of and I have never felt like I belonged with anyone else but you. How do you think I feel when I’m here, naked with the love of my life?” Jungkook pauses. “___, everything I do with you is good. Anything that has to do with you is perfect—even when you’re wrong, I think you’re perfect… A-and… I can’t do this to you, y-you know? It’s you. You feel awkward. You don’t kiss me back.” Jungkook’s voice begins to break, unable to find it in himself to pace his feelings. 

You look at him—really look at him as he continues to pour his feelings out.

“I know you and that’s why I think I need to let you go, ___. I know you would never do anything to hurt me. You would rather mask your feelings and find ways to make sure we’re okay and forget about others we’ve hurt along the way… And m-maybe, that’s why it took me so long to confess to you. I knew you so well and because I did… I always knew it wasn’t going to be me.” 

“Jungkook—”

“I’m sorry, I’m selfish. I’m sorry I’ve been selfish,” he bows his head as he apologizes. “… But you have to understand that I had to try, ___. I had to be yours at least once.”

As stubborn as you are, you refuse to accept this. You’ve always loved Jungkook—romantic feelings can grow over time. You will learn to love him the way he loves you and this way; everyone was right. 

It was Jungkook. 

It had to be. 

“I don’t know what you’re saying,” you blurt, demanding for him to make sense. “You wanted me so much all these years and when I’m finally yours—this is what you’re doing? I’m finally fighting for us and now you don’t want me to?”

“Bhie—”

“I love you one,” you utter.

Jungkook answers with no hesitation, “I love you two.”

You sigh, hating the feeling that stirs. You aren’t even sure of what it is.

Disappointment?

Anger?

Humiliation?

Wanting to seize the moment, you bring yourself to Jungkook and cup his face. Just as you’re leaning in, he turns his face, leaving to kiss his cheek. 

“Jungkook—”

“It’s Jin,” he reveals, heartbreakingly so. “You stayed for Jin.”

You stay quiet. The silence lingers thick between you two. It almost makes you feel sick.

You feel terrible.

What have you done?

Your heart burns and you feel so sorry towards him. Even in this state, Jungkook was being a good best friend. He knows you so well. Even in these circumstances, he puts you first.

You’re stuck.

You don’t want him to be right even though he is.

“I think you should go.” Jungkook suggests rather weakly.

You cave, trying to stay optimistic about this. If that’s what he wants, then so be it. This didn’t mean the end for you two. You could try again later, tomorrow, or even the day after that. It didn’t matter. Even if both of your egos are bruised, you two could try again.

It will be okay.

It has to be.

“Okay, sure. Let’s just go to sleep or grab some food or something. We can try this again tomorrow or never if you want. Anything you want, Jungkook. We can try and do this—”

“No,” Jungkook breathes. He can’t believe the words that follow: “___, I think you should go.”

You sit there, still and completely unsure of what to say or do. Jungkook has never kicked you out or asked for space the way he is now. It doesn’t make sense. Even in his hurting and anger; he wanted you around. 

... Then, you comprehend what his words really meant. You’ve never really had high expectations for Jungkook but you never pictured him to do this. In that same sense, Jungkook has never thought of letting you go or being the one to push you away—yet, here he is doing just that.

“You want me to go? You want me to be with my parents?” you begin, unable to stop yourself from breaking into sobs. “A-after everything... Y-you? You don’t want me either?”

“That’s not what I said,” he tells you sternly. He fights the urge to reach out to you. If you were having a hard time listening to Yoongi, maybe you’d listen to him.

Maybe it’s time you go. 

“I don’t want you to go, but this...” Jungkook refers to the mess you are. “This isn’t about me. This is about you and if it’s about you… It’s about your parents, ___.”

Exhaustion.

You two are tired. You two are burning out. You two, at the very least, have tired each other out.

“I don’t know what to say,” you admit, partly feeling betrayed. He has given your entire life purpose all these years only for him to… To do this? “You’re the only one I love.”

“Yeah,” Jungkook mumbles, knowing it better than anyone else. He can’t deny your adoration for him… But it ached to pretend like he didn’t want more from you. It ached to deserve more than what you can give him. He knows that. He’s always known that. “… You love me but...”

“But what?”

You chase his eyes. He chokes, not knowing how to get you to understand how painfully clear this all has become to him. In the midst of it all, he asks you what could possibly define you and him forever.

“Are you in love with me?”

It’s then that Jungkook notices the light in your eyes dim. A breath of unsteady feelings escapes your lips as you dig within yourself for the answer he’s asking for. The same way the moment fleets, it burns as intensely as fire. Then slowly and all at once, the warmth he once felt with you begins to die out.

The air is chilly as Jungkook sits between the silence, your bare bodies, and sinking hearts—waiting for the words that would never come. 

[notnctu]

backseat chronicles - n.jm | ridin’ club

━ welcome to the ridin’ club smut series

genre ➠ slow burn, smut, fluff, lil angst  wordcount ➠ 8.5k details ➠ fem!reader, streetracer!jaemin, badboy!jaemin, college!au ━ where Jaemin brings you to his club races as his arm candy. warnings ➠ explicit language, overstimulation, flirty banter, pet names, softdom!jaemin, car sex, praise kink, hittin it raw (y/n on the pill), oral, daddy kink, slight corruption kink, fingering synopsis ➠ There is no reasonable explanation as to why or how you always end up in the backseat of Na Jaemin’s beloved car. Almost routinely, he picks you up around ten in the evening with the stereo blasting the raunchiest lyrics for your entire suburban neighborhood to hear. The entire night remains purely friendly, a dabble of flirtatious comments because well, it’s Jaemin for fuck sakes. But all it takes is one suggestive gaze from his dark, lustful eyes and a drop in his voice that rumbles your core to have you climbing over the seats to get to the back. taglist ➠ @rabbit-doyochi​​​ ; @darkneogotmyback​​​ ; @im-lame-irl​​​ ; @p-mini​​​ ; @niniluvsmarkhyuck​​​ ; @saniahmichael​​ ; @jaehy9ngs​​​ ; @danyxthirstae01​​​ ; @jaehyunoos​​​ ; @pikijaemin​​​ ; @suhweo​​​ ; @yunoyeol​​​ ; @lanadreamie​​​ ; @ta3ilmoon​​​ ; 

a/n ➠ hi yall its author doie❀!! thank you for over 1k notes on this series, im beyond impressed by the amount of attention this got! it really blew up and its so crazy!! i wrote this one with more of a romantic plotline i realized its too hard to keep it pwp with all the story building and characterization i have :)) it’s almost over yall! pls pls leave me feedback im sorry it took so long to write ):

While college lecture rooms are too big to interact with other students, discussion classes are there to ease the difficulty. A classroom for about twenty students from a three hundred person lecture. It’s administered by a clueless TA, who barely began his second term in graduate school.

Unlike lecture, attendance is mandatory for participation points. You show up every time without a fail, so it came as a shock to you when a certain blue haired student finally appeared from the list of absent students.

Na Jaemin. The notorious playboy with looks that kill and partakes in some illegal racing club. It’s as if every person in the room fawns over his aura, Jaemin drips with an inexplicable alluring confidence. You didn’t know anything about him besides the fact that he never shows up for class and rumors about how he’s slept with the entire cheer squad.

But he’s drawn to you like a magnet: always sitting in the available spot next to you, asking about your day before the TA arrives, developing an odd staring problem. You don’t feed much into his attention, minding your own business when he starts with his notably flirtatious greeting.

“You just take my breath away, (Y/N).” Jaemin cocks back in his seat with legs stretched wide in an overly comfortable manner. The smug smirk on his face cannot be ignored, he’s doing the absolute most to get you to pay the smallest attention to him.

“I didn’t do anything in particular to do that, Jaemin.” You respond bitterly, pulling out your notes for today’s discussion class. The TA enjoys wasting the first twenty minutes going over the past lecture slides and running through the most obvious topics.

You pay no mind to Jaemin peering over at you with the single handedly most dreamy eyes and smile --- stars shining in his dark orbs and a dazzling twinkle in his wide toothy grin.

“That’s why you’re so amazing. You do nothing and it still leaves me breathless.” His sneaky eyes examine your clothing choice for the long day. On this warm afternoon, the short tank top does nothing to hide much of your skin and the denim shorts that ride up a little too well drive Jaemin insane. And when you cross your legs together, he swallows the spit that pools in the back of his throat.

Your ears catch onto the murmurs of the rest of the class, the midterm is next week. The wretched midterm that is half of your grade dooms you, it is going to take an endless amount of completely undistracted dedicated hours of study--- “On a more serious note, can you help me with this class?”

His voice shatters your inner panic, if anything, adds to the stress that already beats down on your shoulders. You look up to glare at him, but you’re entirely taken aback by the new styling of his hair and the exposure of his tattoos.

The sweet blue cotton candied strands are ruffled lazily above his brows, messy from him constantly running his hand through them. Jaemin sits relaxed in gray sweatpants that are extremely baggy on his slender figure, hands are shoved casually into the pockets.

But what has you staring for longer is the long sleeve of tattoos that wrap around his left arm. Not that you’re surprised that Jaemin has tattoos, let alone a whole sleeve, but this is your first time seeing it as this is the first time he’s come to class without his leather jacket on. Something about the intricate lines and shadowing make Jaemin seem much cooler, almost more attractive.

When you meet his eyes, his lips curl slowly into a sly side smile and he’s practically eating you up under his gaze. He definitely knew that you were staring and what comes next out of his mouth will haunt you for it. “Like what you see, beautiful?”

“I don’t have the time to help you.” The best way out of this situation is to simply ignore it. Jaemin is overly adored and admired by many, he’ll find someone else to help him.

“Jaemin, do you want to study together?” There you go, folks. The random girl snickers with her small huddle of friends in the upper corner of the room, like a crowd of crows, they’re all waiting around for Jaemin to accept her offer so he can be easily integrated into their little group.

However, you watch how his glances bounce between you and her. The most sickly sweet, kind smile is almost too fake to consider it to be genuine. His final choice surprises you, “thank you for offering, but I only want (Y/N)...”

Your breath hitches and gets caught in your throat as you hope for him to finish his sentence, the drumming of your heart distracting you even more. Jaemin wants you? While the thought is flattering, it puzzles you greatly.

“... to help me with my studies.” Jaemin finishes his sentence after a rather long pause, his eyes finally resting upon your figure shying away and finding any way to seem uninterested in the conversation. “Is that going to be okay, (Y/N)?”

“What do I get out of it?” You can’t believe that you are actually considering it. But this is a man that only wants you to help him. Jaemin is an impossible, yet charming man and whatever comfortable attire he is wearing today is really aiding in his request.

He lights up, ears perked up and eyes attentive. His hands fold together on the empty desk, leaning forward towards you. “Dates with me.”

Rolling your eyes, you groan slightly at the arrogant answer. “I don’t care about that. I want something that benefits me.”

“I’ll make sure you’re well fed.” There is a tiny plea in his tone, a remarkable shift from his cool aura. “What do you want? I’ll give it to you.”

“I guess I can’t turn down free food…” there is a hang in your sentence as you contemplate what chaos you’re about to dive into and what life changes are about to be explored with Jaemin.

“Before you agree,” Jaemin chuckles, “there’s one more thing I’d like you to do for me.”

You’re quick to shoot a daggering glare at the overly enthusiastic boy, “why do I suddenly owe you favors?”

“Because I say so.” He deadpans, a chill running down your spine at the deep dip in his octave. The playfulness that was present all this time suddenly vanished, a serious look that intimidates you, but sexy enough to where it erupts something in your core. He blinks at you with dark clouded eyes and you nervously anticipate what he is going to ask next of you.

“Accompany me to my races.” He speaks lowly as if he’s afraid of someone else eavesdropping in the conversation.

Here’s your issue with that request: you’ve never really been part of that scene. You’ve lived pretty mundanely, even in college. It’s simple, you like to stay within the boundaries of what you enjoy to do and what you have to do. But you’re always open minded and willing to try something to determine whether or not you’re fond of it.

Partying and drinking copious amounts of alcohol weren’t your favorite things to do, especially to the point of forgetting your nights. You wanted to remember your nights as much as you do your days. The youth isn’t here for long, why waste them by blacking out in the middle of a large party? Also, whoever said that alcohol goes down smooth is a blatant liar.

Illegal racing could possibly be an extension of people who participate in those things, which is fine, but does place a crippling fear of coming off too boring or unrelatable inside your nervous system. But just because you don’t do those things doesn’t mean that you’re not as cool, right?

Since when was your status based nonsensically on how often you spend your nights in socializing crowds full of sweaty bodies and how much cheap booze you can drink? It had to be all in your head --- you’re just dreading any awkward socializing with people who race cars when it’s absolutely illegal.

“Why me?” It’s a genuine answer, possibly stemming from your insecurities of not being on the same level of charm as Jaemin exudes. You’re not a fool, you’re well aware of the many different people he comes across on campus so, why you?

Jaemin doesn’t hesitate to answer, “why not you? You’re just my type. Hot and smart. Cute and a little shy. The greatest duality, if you ask me.” His words seem so genuine that it has you believing these things about yourself as well.

Nonetheless, you’re taken aback by his observations and his choice of descriptions. “We’ve barely ever talked. How can you say these things so confidently about me?”

Jaemin slightly pulls your chair closer to his own and you yelp in response to the sudden movement and lack of space that separates the two of you. He leans into you, breath hot on your skin and obvious eyes darting between your shocked ones and pretty lips.

“So let’s get to know each other. I can already tell that it’ll just make me fall for you even more.” His finger lightly traces your jaw, stopping at your chin to give it a small lift to meet his focus. Jaemin loves how you squirm underneath his intensity, you’re too cute to let go. “Plus, my boys will love you. I’m sure of it.”

The TA rushes in quickly and is utterly distressed from the traffic that had pushed back his schedule. “Sorry, I’m late everyone.” He rummages through his things to find his notes, but groans to see that the monitor of the computer is off. It’s going to take him another ten minutes to input all his credentials.

But your attention doesn’t stray from Jaemin, especially with his delicate touch at the bottom of your chin. His gentle smile enacts nothing but a soft love, and a peak of interest. Na Jaemin, the one and only. He’s like an adventure waiting to be explored, an open bottle of fun for you to take a sip.

“What would I have to do?” Your voice comes out shaky.

“Just be there as your pretty self.” Jaemin comes off as the type to always have women around him, “you’ll be my lucky charm. For some reason, I always feel better around you.”

The escalation of this conversation is possibly more action you’ve had to handle in the last two years. Jaemin drops your chin and falls back into his own seat with his arms crossed. He is about to turn your life upside down and whether that be a good or bad thing, you don’t mind. You’re excited for the new thrills that come with being by Na Jaemin’s side.

Jaemin’s hot hands lift your shirt quickly, throwing it towards the front seat of his car. His lips return to your soft neck, nibbling at your skin tenderly and with love bites that will remind you of his gentle touches. The streetlamps outside flicker impatiently as you feel the eagerness soaking your panties and he lifts you up to take them off.

“My sweet girl,” his voice is light and airy that it becomes almost lost in the heat of the car. “You’re excited tonight. Did you miss me?” The devilish smirk can be felt upon your collarbones.

“Yes, I haven’t seen you for almost five days.” A peculiar whine settles in your pout and Jaemin’s low growl sends shivers down your spine. The only barrier are his own tight jeans and your hands are fast at unbuckling his belt. Jaemin relaxes back, forearms resting on your soft thighs and watching the neediness in your expression and the speed of your hands. He smiles to himself seeing you this way, wanting him so badly that you can’t wait to get him out of his jeans.

Throughout the two months that you and Jaemin finally became well acquainted, he’s fallen inexplicably into your trance. His friends made it very clear to you that he doesn’t keep the same girl around for more than a few weeks. But he’s brought you to almost every race so far and despite the initial shock of your appearance after the third time, you didn’t let the passing comments phase you.

Why he hasn’t replaced you is unknown and truthfully, there is no reasonable explanation how you always wind up in the backseat of his car by the end of the night. It’s become part of your routine. Jaemin picks you up around ten in the evening with raunchy lyrics blasting out of his personalized car for your entire suburban neighborhood to hear. More often than not, Jaemin has food ready for you to devour and a cozy blanket for your exposed legs.

You’ve learned a bit more about him through your backseat chronicles. Jaemin is possibly one of the only people in your life with a heart bigger than his own body, while also being as carefree as he can. Oddly enough, he cares about you as his friend and as his companion. Not to mention the ridiculous, yet endearing nickname, “Lucky Charm”, that he has coined upon you.

Jaemin has been the best adventure you’ve had in ages. While he takes you on intoxicating thrill rides on the leather of his back seats, every street race has been more than unforgettable. He shares one of the same values as you --- wanting to remember the present. You both know that you’ll remember each other enough for it to transcend into your next lives.

You have him to thank for your youthful experiences, to learn and dive into this new found world of mischief under his care. Jaemin treats you extraordinarily well, he’d never hurt a soul. He showers you in appraisal and carefulness, he’s attentive to your behavior and remembers your favorite things. And he reminds you almost every time you see him that he’s so grateful to have you in his life.

“Have you been touching yourself?” Jaemin’s bold question catches you off guard as it causes your hands to shyly hover over his unzipped jeans. When you glance up at him with soft innocent eyes, as if you’re guilty of a crime and wish to beg for forgiveness, his facial expression is serious and intimidating. 

“Continue, baby. You can be honest with me. Daddy isn’t going to punish you if you did.” His tone is sweet and light, but his eyes are dark and piercing. His lips are drawn tightly into a thin line, no curve in sight.

His finger grazes down your cheek gently as he admires your slightly parted lips and the way your eyelashes dance every time you blink. However, his other hand urges you to continue your previous action of getting him out of his restrictive jeans.

You nod, while rubbing his erection through his gray briefs that hug him so tightly. There’s a sharp intake of breath when you pull the waistband of his underwear down and his cock stands against his lower abdomen. “Do you think of me when you do?” His voice gets caught in his throat when you take him in your warm hand.

“Always.” You kiss his jawline and fix your position above his dick. Your slick pussy presses down against his shaft, coating it in your juices and rubbing his tip to your clit for a delicious sensation. Jaemin groans, his gaze dipping between your lower bodies and back to your face.

“My sweet (Y/N) thinks about her daddy fucking her senseless while she touches herself.” Jaemin chuckles darkly, grinding his hips harder against you. There is a shift in the atmosphere as he grips your hips and slowly enters your dripping hole. “That’s cute, baby.”

You hold onto his shoulders as his raw dick fills you to the brim, stretching you out like past nights. Gasps leave your body when he starts pulling all the way out to only have you sink back down. “Daddy, please just fuck me.”

Jaemin picks up his speed, knowing that you have a quiz due at midnight that you scolded him for forgetting earlier. The grip on his shoulders tighten as this man navigates your body all too well. He knows you like the back of his hand, fucking the spot that causes your body to lose control.

One of his favorite sights in the world is the view of your lips parted open with loud whimpers falling effortlessly. Your eyes roll back into your skull as his hips roll deeper into your walls, the tip hitting your sweet spot repeatedly.

“You’re always the best girl for me, aren’t you?” His hand wraps around your neck when you throw your head back, choking you lightly and your walls grip around his shaft. “I know you’re close. Cum on my dick, baby. Be a good girl.”

Jaemin’s tattoos shine under the moonlight when you peer down at him. His hooded eyes are intoxicated by the pure image of your fucked out body and he’s truly in love. “My good girl, come on baby.” He continues to encourage, his other hand giving you a smack on your ass when he drills mercilessly into you.

The familiar bubbling occupy your lower half and the feeling of release unravels all so suddenly. You fall forward, Jaemin lets go of your neck to hold your limp body close to him, your head on his shoulder as your orgasm overtakes you. He grinds his hips into you to prolong your shaking climax, cooing sweet nothings in your ear as his other hand takes a whole handful of ass to squeeze.

He bottoms out, filling you up to the rim to cum deep inside of you. Jaemin moans loudly, his cum spilling all over your walls. You two sit like that until he grows soft, pampering your temples with gentle kisses. Jaemin remembers to take care of you, no matter what.

While you’re in his arms, he reaches for sanitary wipes in the side compartments. He lifts your hips slowly to pull out and you sigh at the emptiness. Gently, he swipes at the dripping cum from your pussy and makes sure that you’re all cleaned up before getting dressed.

“So, you want to tell me why you’ve been MIA for the past five days?” Rolling your eyes, you pull up your panties and fix the last decency of your hair.

“Car meets that are too far for me to take you.” His thumb rubs your chin lovingly and Jaemin’s eyes are so bright and mesmerizing, you find that it’s hard to look him in the eye at times.

“Not because you’ve been hooking up with other girls?” There is a tinge of sarcasm that laces your rhetorical question and though you don’t expect him to give you an actual answer, you take note of his reaction. Jaemin raises an eyebrow, clearing his throat and looking out the window away from you.

“And if I was?” Truthfully, that question hurt you more than your’s hurt him. His hand rests underneath his chin as he patiently waits for your answer. He admires the clear night sky and the rundown abandoned liquor store that stands all by itself.

“What do you want me to say?” Question after question, a stiff tension replaces the sex of the car.

“I’ll take you back now.” Jaemin crawls back to the driver’s seat, completely ignoring your confused figure. He has always been quite like this: going aloof whenever he wants to dodge something. However, it’s been happening more frequently the past times you two have been seeing each other.

The truth is simple, yet entirely complex at the same time. You and Jaemin aren’t dating, despite always going out together and him posessively introducing you to other men. You and Jaemin aren’t dating.

Nevertheless, it doesn’t stop you from growing feelings for him and you can tell that this happens too often for the attractive boy. He can’t have a fuckbuddy that won’t fall head over heels for him. But who could really blame you? Even if all this time Jaemin was pretending that he cared about you, he still pampers you like a princess; he still tells you he does.

But when it comes to discussion about advancing into something more, he hides and grows silent. This has you wondering, maybe this entire thing to him is all sex? And he can’t love you back the way you do.

No one knows his heart, not even himself. He’s never wanted to complicate his life, it’s always been about two things: racing and having fun. There is no easy way to explain it all, the thoughts that flood his mind and heart, so he chooses every way to ignore it. Overall, he’s genuinely lost. You are one source of stability in his life that he isn’t willing to let go, ever. But just because he won’t let you go, doesn’t mean that you won’t take the chance to leave when you’re fed up with him.

This has him wondering, how far can he push before he pushes you too far?

“No, it’s fine. I’ll just walk.” Tonight is unsettling, it usually doesn’t end like this. Jaemin locks the car doors and turns around to reach for your hand. “Jaemin, open the door.”

“I want you to say that you hate when I sleep with other people.” Jaemin confesses all too wildly as his hand lightly squeezes around your wrist. “And I want you to mean it.” He’s only speaking words of truth that haven’t had the time to process in his own thoughts.

“I hate when you sleep with other people.” And you do mean it. You mean it more than anything you’ve ever said to this man. Jaemin just sighs, bringing your wrist to his lips for a lasting kiss.

“Can I drive you home?” Jaemin asks softly, eyes dipping down to the leather seats and avoiding all need for eye contact.

“Yes, Jaemin.” He pulls you back into the passenger seat and drapes the soft blanket over your exposed legs. “Hopefully, I still have time to take my quiz.”

“Can I come inside?” Jaemin coolly turns his marble wheel to reverse out of the parking space, a hand resting on the shoulder of your seat as he does a double take behind him for any pedestrians, even if you two are far out in the middle of nowhere and there isn’t anyone around; Jaemin knows you have the hots for him when he does that specific move.

“What do you mean? You’ve already cum inside.”

It’s the sound of disappointment as his tongue tsks at you and he flicks lightly at your forehead. He steps on the acceleration, revving the annoying engine that roars throughout the peaceful night. The multicolored lights illuminate around his stereo and at your feet, creating the Rainbow Road right out of Mario Kart. 

Jaemin isn’t like the others who pay close attention to the details of his car. His motto goes, “if I like it, I’m going to have it.” Whether or not anything matches goes beyond his worries.

In some ways, his car is a mirror of his own personality --- wild and free, colorful and welcoming. And his skills as a driver? Safe, no matter how far the speedometer goes, Jaemin always makes you feel safe.

“I mean come inside your room for aftercare. You know how much I hate leaving you without a proper cuddle.” He pouts and almost immediately his cute baby tone comes out with his beg. Almost subconsciously, Jaemin lays his right palm open facing up to invite yours in. Almost routinely, you lace your hands to complete his hold. Getting Jaemin to smile has never been easier as his hold grows tighter.

“You can’t stay over tonight though. My housemates are doing some Single Girls Only house event tomorrow and it starts immediately when we wake up.” You laugh as the ridiculous words fill the air.

“And you’re participating in that?” Jaemin mindlessly asks and you’re unable to differentiate his implications from the question. Is he asking because the idea is horrendously nothing you’d like to do or he’s implying that you’re not single?

“Why wouldn’t I?” Sounding rather harsher than intended, Jaemin finally realizes how poorly he had worded his previous question. Yet, a part of him feels disappointment whirling in his chest and a desire to feel wanted by you.

“Doesn’t seem like something you’d like: wallowing in your singleness.” He chuckles, remaining lighthearted and playful.

“I really don’t.” Jaemin brings your knuckles up to his lips for a lingering kiss, his eyes darting quickly on the road ahead now that you’ve entered the metropolitan areas and his speed drops significantly to avoid getting ticketed.

“I’ll come pick you up. Instead of being single tomorrow, you’ll be on a date.” When you turn to examine his facial expression, the serious tension in his jawline and focused eyes alarm you. Your stomach twists into knots and if he couldn't already tell, your palms grow sweaty at his offer.

“That’s such a slap in the face to them.” Pulling your hand away from his, you cross your arms and lean your head against the cold window. “I don’t think I can do that to them.”

“I have a race tomorrow.” He starts, his head tilting over at you with his round gorgeous begging eyes, “at least, come to that with me.”

“Okay, but only because I want to see Haechan.” As if it wasn’t moments ago, Jaemin was the one balls deep in you and now you’re spewing enthusiasm for another man. It’s all a joke, a way for you to conceal your undying attraction for Jaemin.

You still remember the first time you met the sunshine that is Haechan and the jealousy that seeped from Jaemin’s words when he noticed the exchange of flirtation. Haechan is someone you’d knowingly gravitate towards: a man with a loud personality that just knows how to conduct every personality in the room. And at that moment, Jaemin couldn’t tell if being more observant was a good or bad thing.

Jaemin never saw himself as outgoing as his other friends, staying more kept in his own circle, but he had the confidence to fake it. He’s bold, rather impulsive and slightly narcissistic, Jaemin knows how to use his strengths very well. 

However, when he saw the soft smirk on Haechan’s face and your shy mannerisms, a small tinge in his chest ignited a died out flame. He didn’t realize it before, but that was the very start of his long tumble of feelings for you.

“Do you say those things to purposefully get me jealous?” Jaemin rests his hand on your thigh, giving it a harsh squeeze. His eyes never leave the road and his tone reverts back to his dominant tone.

“Well, are you jealous?” It’s like you two dance in circles, answer questions with a question does not stop.

And as bratty as your tone is, you don’t expect the quick “yes” that answers back and the smoldering look he gives you briefly before focusing back on the drive.

“Then good.” You huff, ready to hop out of the car after the odd, yet sensual tension. Jaemin pulls up to your house and double parks the car to lean in for a nightly goodbye kiss.

“You’re not coming in?” You try to read his facial expressions, but he hides his emotions too perfectly.

His lips curl into a smile before saying, “I think it’s better I cool off tonight.” And you mindlessly give him a peck, but he holds your face to deepen it. Through the kiss, you can feel the neediness by the way Jaemin shoves his tongue into your mouth. The taste of lust against your palette is difficult to ignore, but your academically responsible mind screams at you about your forgotten quiz.

Your hand lightly taps at his chest and he pulls away, his eyes drinking up your swollen lips. “I have a quiz, Jaemin.”

“I know, sorry. It’s just so easy to get lost in you.” Jaemin kisses your cheek once more before you exit. You smile back at him as his words have grown a strong effect on you lately. Bidding him goodbye, he wishes you sweet dreams as he patiently makes sure you’re fully inside your house.

“Is the music too loud?” Jaemin checks over at your hunched figure in the passenger seat. You’re diligently flipping through your thick textbook, a yellow highlighter in one hand and the other comfortably holding Jaemin’s.

The worst part of college is the never ending midterms that are given at any time. Studying in his car isn’t a rare sight, if anything it is more expected than you not doing anything related to your academics. But Jaemin genuinely doesn’t mind, even being mindful about his own actions to ensure an optimal studying space for you.

He really is an ideal guy. Like his first promise, he keeps you well fed and never once asks you for any monetary pay back. Jaemin adjusts the car temperature before you even step into the vehicle, knowing that you prefer wearing less clothes rather than more. Though he isn’t academically responsible, he still makes the effort to try and understand enough information to pass his classes.

The sole flaw would be the lack of open communication. It’s genuinely difficult for you to read his emotions or intentions. Jaemin always has a dazed look in his eyes whenever he looks at you, and it’s an internal fight about whether or not you’re being delusional.

“Music is fine, honey.” The mindless use of a pet name slips from your lips, but your concentration on neoliberalism and globalization doesn’t allow for you to notice.

Nevertheless, Jaemin catches on immediately to the usage. While he showers you in ridiculous nicknames, you’re not one to do so. “Honey?”

“Yes?” You answer back carelessly, not entirely actively listening to him as you highlight an important concept in your book.

“No, you called me honey.”

Looking up from your page, you blink at him with wide eyes and mouth slightly agape. “I did?”

Jaemin chuckles and finally pulls into the overly crowded parking lot, a whole mass of fanboys cheering at the arrival of his flashy vehicle. Everyone just loves Jaemin.

This familiar scene plays like a reel --- several high beams cast light under the dark sky due to the lack of functioning street lamps, dizzy multicolored cars that blaze the tracks, and the all too distinct smell of musky cologne in the chilly air. Oh, and the wide eye admirable stares when you get out of the car.

“Hi, you’re stunning.” A bold new recruit blinks at you in complete awe and awkwardly clears his throat once he realizes his rash comment.

Jaemin raises an eyebrow at him, then at how you plan on handling the situation. You’re flattered, nonetheless, but know that Jaemin didn’t bring you here to flirt with other men. “Thank you. I hope you enjoy your membership in the Ridin’ Club.”

The gracefulness in your delicate voice has the youthful recruit swooning and subtly giddy as he runs off to join a group of others that have been eying you across the parking lot. Jaemin casually drapes his leather jacket over your exposed shoulders, knowing the temperature change is going to result in you most likely catching a cold and because you never bring a jacket despite his plea.

“The power you hold.” Jaemin winks at you before pulling you into a larger crowd to socialize with more impressionable recruits.

“Ah, so you’re (Y/N)!” The stranger is unrecognizable, but you giggle to acknowledge his confident statement. “We haven’t met before, but Jaemin was talking about you the other night at our motorcycle meet.”

Your eyes light up, as if you’ve unlocked a new fun fact of Na Jaemin. “You drive a motorcycle too?” You’re truly shocked at the talent of this man.

Jaemin snakes his arm around your lower waist to draw you closer to his side. “Yeah, but I can’t fuck you in a motorcycle, can I?”

Before the other men can comment on the obvious sexual tension that Jaemin created, he leans in to whisper into your ear. “Actually, I can, but we’ll save our decency from unwanted exposure.” His hot breath grazes against the shell of your ear and you just know where you two are going to end up tonight.

“Bro, you guys probably fuck in the backseat of his car.” One of them chimes recklessly, punching at each others’ chest playfully as if he made a decent joke.

“Why don’t you stay to find out?” Jaemin retorts and the grip on your hip becomes tighter. You’re too flustered to add much into this odd form of competitive banter, distracted by none other than the way Jaemin keeps glancing over at you with a delicious gleam in his eyes.

“So what? You don’t care about us now?” You’d know that bratty tone from anywhere as Lee Haechan pushes past everyone else to rush over to the both of you.

“Aw, are your feelings hurt?” Jaemin sticks his tongue out at his friend before cordially sharing a handshake with him.

“Just slightly.” Haechan looks over at you with a wide grin and playful eyes, “hello, my pretty girl.”

“Drop the possessives, Haechan.” Jaemin rolls his eyes with an irritable twitch on his lips.

He hates how obviously jealous he gets. It’s something too difficult for himself to control, he’s exhausted his efforts to bite his tongue whenever it comes to other people’s flirtations. The thought of someone else calling you theirs doesn’t sit well with him.

“I understand your jealousy, Jaem. If someone was flirting with (Y/N), I wouldn’t be able to stand it either.” Haechan fixes the falling jacket on your shoulders. “But she can handle herself, I know those pretty lips have a mind of their own.” His gaze drops momentarily, yet obvious enough for you to grow shy at how strong Haechan is coming off tonight.

“Stop trying to corrupt her, that’s my job.” Jaemin playfully pushes at Haechan’s chest and they both break out laughing.

“I haven’t said one thing and you’re both talking about me as if I’m not here.” Your small pout is literally the cutest thing to Jaemin. He physically has to stop himself from planting the sweetest kiss on it.

It’s blatantly clear that you’re hot stuff. You’re the perfect example of a head turner, your captivating aura has its ability to suffocate those around you. However, Jaemin has seen all sides of you, but overall finding you so entirely cute. And oddly enough, Jaemin has a knack for cute things.

“Is that (Y/N) I hear?” Huang Renjun engulfs you in a hug, showing clear affection and doesn’t mind doing so. “How did your project go?”

“It went well. You accomplish a lot when you don’t procrastinate.” Renjun gleams at your statement and if Jaemin is delusional enough, he’d probably mistaken the twinkle in his eyes for infatuation instead of admiration.

“You’re so responsible, why are you messing with Jaemin?” Renjun sighs and though his question is more of a joke, there is some truth behind his words.

Your friendship with his friends differ immensely compared to other girls who have come around. Like Jaemin had said before, his boys were going to like you and they do, a lot. Sometimes making it obvious that you’re too good for him.

Jeno comes up from the side, an unidentifiable bruise on his neck and a new cut on his brow. Lee Jeno being such a rough character, his appearance speaks well about how his day has been.

But when he lays his eyes on you, it’s as if all his pain is replaced with joy and security. “(Y/N)! I haven’t seen you in so long!” The enthusiastic boy rushes over to greet you with a warm smile.

“I’m pretty sure I was here a week ago.” You laugh, but welcome him in your arms for a tender friendly hug and pat his head out of habit.

“It’s been a week?! That’s so long.” Jeno narrows his eyes at Jaemin and flicks his forehead.

“Ow!” Jaemin exclaims while rubbing the pain away. “You act like she doesn’t go to the same school as us and therefore, can see her any time you want to.” The tone in Jaemin’s voice raises some eyebrows as they all exchange glances to each other before bursting into laughter.

“Like your jealous ass would allow for that?” Haechan remarks and Jaemin doesn’t outwardly react. However, Jaemin’s hand is squeezing you so tight that you’re more than certain he’s bothered by the comment.

“Oh, stop it. You all know I’m Team Jaemin. He does have the most wins this past month.” You only know that through Jaemin’s proud boasting, anything else in the racing world is unknown to you.

Jaemin situates you in between his legs as he slightly sits on the hood of his car. His arms wrap around your middle and chin rests on your shoulder. Public display of affection isn’t a problem for him, and you learned much earlier that Jaemin can’t keep his hands off of you.

Renjun scoffs at your whimsical fact, in absolute disbelief. “It hurts more hearing you say it. I’m getting my car upgraded, but once it’s done, I’m going to blaze his ass on the tracks.”

“Are you racing today?” Jeno asks the blue haired fellow that clings onto you like a koala.

“Yeah, against a newbie. Apparently he’s really good, so I’m not too sure I’ll win.” Jaemin mumbles into your hair.

“You say that every time, yet you win!” Renjun crosses his arms, weight shifting to his left leg as he pops his hip out. There is always a sense of competition between anyone with Renjun.

Jaemin perks up behind you and when you turn around in his arms, you’re face to face with a beaming smile. “That’s because I have you.” Eyes lock with yours, he isn’t saying that directed to Renjun. Na Jaemin has you wrapped around his pinky, the butterflies fluttering in your stomach are too hard to ignore.

“Alright, lovebirds. Get in your car and let’s start this shit.” Haechan groans and claps his hands to draw the crowd’s attention. Cupping them around his mouth, he roars into the starry night, “let’s roll!”

During the race, Jaemin’s number one priority is to keep you safe. While you’ve sat in his car for a number of times now, it’s different once the loud bang goes off and he’s hitting 100 mph. Tonight’s track is much more dangerous, with twists and turns that can have the vehicle flying weightlessly if he’s not careful.

“You trust me, right?” Jaemin has both hands on the wheel and the engine rumbling as you both anticipate the start of the race.

Spectators watch on the sidelines as if it’s the ultimate battle, but Jaemin doesn’t pay them much mind. He’s more concerned about you instead. “Of course. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be sitting here right now. You’ve proven yourself that you’re an excellent driver, so let’s win this.”

Jaemin smirks at your encouraging words, feeling a warmth spread across his chest. “I’ll tap out any time you want me to, okay?”

You nod and the initial whip of the car is so intense that you didn’t even register the sound off. It’s not your first race, but it’s been awhile since the last one. When you adjust to the pressure, the lanes in front of you cause a slight queasiness in your stomach.

It’s a two lane windy road that wraps around the mountain side and Jaemin happens to be in the outer lane. All it takes is a second of lost control and you two will hit the metal railings that guard the cliff below. Despite your inner panic, Jaemin guides you through the pooling anxiety that leaves you restless.

“(Y/N), look up and out the window. We’re coming up on the cliff side view, I’ve always wanted to bring you here.” Your eyes land on the dazzling glitter that dances on the ripples of the lake. It’s so vast, the moon high up in the sky is reflected on the water below. It’s a romantic scene of melancholy and bliss. Suddenly, you feel at peace in the middle of this high speed race.

“It’s beautiful, Jaem.” You whisper calmly and he’d reach for your hand to hold, but races take too much wheel control. And he’d turn to look at you, but races take too much concentration on the road ahead.

But throughout every obstacle, he hears the gentleness and the solidarity in your cadence in the midst of all the high stress. He, too, feels peace. He feels calm knowing that you’re simply by his side, even in the face of danger. So, he can finally admit to himself… he genuinely developed feelings for you.

Before you know it, you’re thrusted side to side from the sharp turns and the adrenaline kicks in when the other racer catches up right next to Jaemin. “Fuck,” Jaemin curses underneath his breath and steps harshly on the acceleration. “Baby, I’m going to go a bit faster so hold onto something.” He warns and your hand finds the grab handle. It’s neck and neck at this point.

Usually, you squeeze your eyes shut to avoid becoming too overwhelmed by the sights in front of you. Tonight is different, not entirely knowing why, you’re observing every element that circles around the perimeter.

The finish line is up ahead, but there is no sign that the other racer is slowing down. Then, you see it: the fatal mistake that can cost you both of your lives if you didn’t catch it. “Jaemin, watch out!” You yelp when the other car inches dangerously close, your warning allows Jaemin to make a controlled swerve away from a possible hit.

Jaemin shakes his head and tsks at the recklessness. “Now I know why he’s good. It’s foul play.” He blows his bang out of his eyes and casually says, “thank you for warning me. This is why I need you by my side.”

He makes it to the finish line barely before the other, winning the race by half a second. Jaemin brakes smoothly, tire marks scrapping the concrete below, and you both exit the car to celebrate with everyone else.

But before the mass of eager shouting men make their way over to you two, Jaemin hurries to your side to pull you into a steamy, rewarding kiss. The scene is just like the movies; his hand on your lower back and yours on his chest lightly. His lips taste like triumph, like he had won more than just a simple race against a random stranger. He’s won the best person he could ever have.

You two fled the scene after cussing out the other racer. It was a rare sight to see: Jaemin being all bothered and angry, practically fuming after scrambling back into the driver’s seat. However, your mind had mischievous plans of its own and all it took was one look from his hooded eyes for you to announce that you wanted him --- badly.

Back in your usual abandoned parking lot, Jaemin pauses before following you to the back seats. With the engine off and the dead of the night being absolute silent, the tension remains thick around you two. “(Y/N),” Jaemin is about to confess something he never thought he’d admit. He turns to you sitting in the middle seat with just your panties on and a curious look on your face.

His heart burns and despite being so incredibly aroused, he controls his urges enough to be able to say, “I’m into you.”

“I know you’re into me, that’s how we ended up like this in the first place.” You giggle cluelessly to his words, still not understanding the odd shift in mood and intentions. It’s always his unclear, messy intentions.

Though he can’t entirely figure out his puzzle pieces, he has plenty to connect the dots. “I like you. I want to be in a relationship with you and call you my girlfriend.”

You’re stunned. Did Jaemin just confess to you as you sit in your panties ready to fuck? This softness is different from the sides you’ve seen of him. It’s similar to a lost bunny, wandering grasslands to find a purpose. He looks so fragile, one intense stare and he’d crumble. This softness is vulnerability.

“So do it.” The boldness catches him off guard, but switches on the dominance in him. “If you want me, come show it.”

He climbs over the middle console to push you into the leather seats. “Not acting shy anymore, are you?” Practically ripping your shirt off of you, he cups your breast lightly and flicks at your nipples. Your immediate reaction results in a rush of wetness down your core.

“Before I forget,” sitting up, you share a passionate kiss that you’ve held back long enough. You give it every ounce of feeling you have for him. “If it isn’t obvious enough, I like you too.”

“It’s obvious, baby.” Kissing your nose, he wraps a hand around your throat to lightly push you back down. “But hearing you say it out loud makes me happy.” Jaemin smirks, hand still choking you gently and pampering your jawline with soft kisses.

His free hand reaches down into your dripping panties, circling your clit with your wetness. The sensation causes you to whimper for more. “Daddy, give it to me.” You wiggle in his palm, knowing that the nickname is more than effective.

“My sweet (Y/N) wants to get fucked?” Jaemin rolls your underwear off and rids himself of his own bottoms.

“Yes, please.” Through the darkness, his hard dick stands proudly. Jaemin lines himself up as he thrusts into you without another second of hesitation. He waits for you to adjust to his size, his tip barely grazing your sweet spot. “Fuck…”

“You take me so well, my pretty baby.” Jaemin starts moving his hips, slowly at first to build a rhythm. Taking your legs, he presses them into your chest to fuck you at a deeper angle. And you feel him practically in your guts, his cock pumping against your walls deliciously and bumping into your g-spot. “Do you want more of me?”

Your train of thought is in utter shambles and whatever Jaemin is saying to you barely processes. You’re overwhelmed by a pleasure that fills every system, every part of your body. To answer him, you let out an incoherent noise of approval.

Jaemin pulls your hips down while thrusting forward into you, maximizing every inch of his strokes. This single action causes you to scream and grip onto the headrest. “Who knew my sweet girl could be so fucking dirty?” Jaemin chuckles darkly, his cadence dropping several decibels. “When I first met you, I wanted to ruin you.”

All of his filthy words edge you closer to your release as he continues to repeat his previous motion. He holds your hips in place to grind into you, the feeling of his tip rubbing your walls has your eyes rolling back. “Do you want to cum, (Y/N)?”

“Yes!” You yell, the tight ball in your lower abdomen is bound to break any minute. “I want to cum so badly, please.” You beg and moan, the arch in your back lifts you from the seat of the car. Jaemin snaps his hips into you, drilling you quickly to reach your high. And you break. An euphoric cry fills the air as your walls clench around his length. You hear the extra wetness create a slick noise, but Jaemin isn’t done with you yet.

“You wanted to cum so fucking badly. I’ll reward you with one more for being such a good girl for me.” His thumb flicks at your clit and you convulse into spasms from the sensitivity. Your violently shaking legs can’t hold themselves up anymore and Jaemin rests them on his shoulders. He lines kisses along your ankle as the pleasure overtakes you.

“I don’t think I can do it.” You whine, your fingers twisting and toes curling.

“You are going to try, okay baby?” He coos, but it’s most definitely a demand. He sits back on his knees to pick up more speed, fucking endlessly into your swollen pussy and thumb rubbing fast strips against your bud.

“I’m going to snap, Jaem.” You cry, tears rimming your eyes and before you know it, a second wave hits you. Your second orgasm is ruinous and has you squirming around to regain some sense of control.

“Oh fuck, you’re so beautiful.” Jaemin slows down as your walls grip around him again, tighter this time. “I’m going to fill you up with cum,--- watch it drip out of you.” He grunts while releasing into you, his dick twitching and spraying your insides with white.

He pulls out as hot, white cum spills from your pussy. You take this moment to catch your breath and relax your legs. However, Jaemin coats his two fingers and shoves the cum back into you. “Jaemin!” You exclaim at the sudden intrusion.

He curls them into your plushy walls and finger fucks you into another oblivion. “Wait, again?” Your hands wrap around his wrist, but Jaemin moves too fast for you to catch it.

You’re a moaning mess again, louder than before. Jaemin leans down and flicks his tongue against your overstimulated bundle of nerves. Your back arches automatically and a low animalistic scream rises from your throat.

He observes your body lines underneath the moonlight and the last remaining light the broken street lamps have to offer. Your face contours and you’re so far out into ecstasy that you don’t notice how intensely Jaemin watches you lose yourself.

“It feels too good!” With one last thrilling orgasm, you almost pass out and you see small stars of dizziness. He soaks up every last bit of your cathartic reaction and festers a small sense of pride that he can make you feel all this pleasure.

“Such a good girl. You’re beyond impressive, baby.” Jaemin pulls his fingers out to lick them clean and finds some wipes to help you out of your sticky situation.  

“Now that you’re my girlfriend, can we cuddle at any time now? Not just as after care.” He peers up at you and the one word enacts a burning warmth to spread across your chest. That is the best nickname he can call you by.

“I think the Singles Girls Only house event is still going on, but after that, yes a million times.” You laugh and wrap your arms around him into a big loving hug.

Jaemin feels right at home. All the long years of living carelessly and wild, he’s finally found someone worth the extra mile. While Jaemin was a thriving adventure to be explored, you were his comfort to run back to.

It is through the intimacy of your backseat chronicles that Jaemin was able to fall deeper for you. You’re his lucky charm, for some reason, he always feels better around you. 

[miyagifangkai]

Master-list:

• Requests are open, kind of. Send a request in! If I like it I’ll write it, lovely. 😍•

MULTI FANDOM!!!!

Currently writing for Cobra Kai, The Last Of Us, Resident Evil, Insidious, and Saw franchise.

!Gifs are not mine!

Updated: 10/15/2024

Eli/Hawk:

Small Pieces -

Summary: You have just gone through a very bad breakup in your abusive relationship; you believe that you’re completely alone in dealing with this until you show up to the dojo the next morning with a surprise waiting for you.

Love/Hate -

Summary: Eli is your roommate. You’ve know each other for almost a year and half now and you guys can’t seem to get along. With the endless bickering and claims that you hate each other always tends to mean something else. With undeniable chemistry and constant pining for one another, what do you think is gonna happen?

Prom -

Request: Hello! I was wondering if you could do an imagine of reader showing up to the prom after she told everyone she wasn’t going because she heard Hawk’s there alone? Maybe a friends to lovers situation. Please and thank you! ❤️

Old Wounds -

Summary: Reader and Eli used to be best friends until they grew apart over the years. The two reunite after Eli gets beat up and you’re there to clean up his wounds.

Game Night -

Request: the reader and eli/hawk getting into a really intense gaming match (maybe mario kart ? i’ve seen some crazy stuff happen bc of that game…) at a miyagi-do/eagle-fang game night and the whole thing just ending in pure adorable chaos where the two just end up being an unbeatable mario kart couple ?

Changed -

Request: the reader is a total badass who has gotten into plenty of fights and trouble so to make her “better” her parents send her to cousin Demetri’s for the summer hoping his influence would help her anger. Reader has developed a crush on Eli brining him flowers every time he gets in sight of her. But she loses contact with them after she switches schools again. But when she hits sophomore year of high school she changes to West Valley High; only to get involved in the karate war between Cobra Kai and Miyagi Do.

Changed: Part 2 -

Request: I was wondering if I could get a sequel to it? Perhaps after the following events she got beaten up. A nice guy went up to her and confessed his love to s/o. He even gave s/o some flowers. Everyday the guy always gift s/o some flowers to win her love and he did. The moment Eli sees it he was jealous and doesn’t want them to be together. He tries to break them up by being an asshole as he was.

Changed: Part 3 -

Summary: Hawk invited you and Demetri over for dinner to make amends. Will you two forgive and forget or choose revenge?

Changed: Part 4

Summary: Eli and Y/N go on a date. What will happen??

Girls Night-

Request: How about the reader has a girls night drinking and dancing and becomes extremely drunk. She calls her best friend Hawk to pick her up and confesses her feelings to him and asks him to stay the night for cuddles. In the morning she doesn’t remember her confession and wakes up in Hawk’s arms confused. Friends to lovers is one of my favorite troupes.

Love and Earrings:

Request: i just wanted to pop in and put in a request for some good old fashioned eli moskowitz fluff !! i was maybe thinking eli taking reader to the tattoo/piercing studio to get readers ears peirced but she’s scared ( i want so many piercings and tattoos but im so scared of needles :’) ) and so eli gets his ears peirced with her!!

Touch-

Request: Hawk dating a girl who is very affectionate. She likes to hold him and his face, neck and shoulders, specially the scar.

Crush-

Request: Eli and Reader are best friends but he comes into Cobra Kai with his new persona he ends up teasing the reader. They are sparring one day after karate and the two end up tripping over one another and end up confessing their feelings.

All Valley-

Request: Rehash of the few seasons of Cobra Kai but in the readers eyes. Johnny is your father and Robby is your estranged brother.

Spooky Season-

Summary: You and your friends go to Spirt Halloween together for your friendship tradition.

Surprise, Surprise!-

Request: if possible could i request an eli x reader set in s5 with his post-hawk persona and after the championship and finding out reader is pregnant? and maybe like the ripple effect it would have on everyone else? honestly you can write whatever you’d like! thanks so much

Johnny Lawrence:

Bundle of Joy -

Request: would i be able to request a johnny lawrence x fem!reader set in s4 (if you’ve seen it) where reader finds out she’s pregnant? and johnny’s obviously busy with the tournament and eagle fang stuff so she’s really worried about how he’ll react and if he’d even want it? she’s also in her early to mid 20’s so everyone in eagle fang/miyagi do thinks she’s the coolest :)) feel free to change anything you want from it :)

Best Friends -

Summary: practically best friends to lovers one shot lol couldn’t help myself

Big News -

Request: Hello, hopefully you are having a good day. I would like to know if you could make an imagine where the reader who is Johnny's girlfriend tells Robby that she is pregnant and he is going to be an older brother. I would appreciate it very much.

Birthday Party -

Request: I wonder if you could make an imagine where Johnny wants his son's party with reader to be about karate and there's a fun discussion about that with Robby and Miguel in the middle afraid to give an opinion.

I Need A Hero -

Request: It’s prom night and reader is prom queen (she’s super popular maybe like captain of the cheerleading team or something similar to that) but Johnny isn’t prom king, it’s another popular boy who is the star quarterback of their school. So their school has a tradition where the prom king and queen have to dance together and the guy starts doing or saying things to the reader that she isn’t comfortable with. So Johnny immediately notices and tells the guy to back off and dances with her instead.

Past Lives -

Request: the reader finds a picture of Ali and Johnny when they were teenagers, and knowing the history of the two of them, she feels insecure about it.

Pool Party-

Request: Johnny Lawrence is madly in love with reader but he doesn’t know how to approach her without epically failing (his mind keeps blanking whenever they talk and he ends up saying things that don’t make sense). So one day when they were all invited to a pool party, Johnny and his buddies come up with this brilliant idea of him fake drowning in the pool so reader can save him (she’s a trained lifeguard) and give him CPR. How it ends is entirely up to you.

Healing-

Request: So (Y/N) and Johnny Lawrence are high school sweethearts who get married (let’s pretend that he didn’t date Ali or Shannon). After several years of struggling with infertility, (Y/N) happily discovers that she’s finally pregnant but she dies giving birth to Robby. Her tragic death becomes the catalyst of Johnny’s depression and his neglect of Robby. But the father and son duo eventually reconcile and they start to bond while looking at old photos or videos of (Y/N).

Family Dinner-

Request: Johnny and Y/N have been dating for several months and now it’s time for Young Johnny Lawrence to meet his girlfriend’s family. Johnny thought he would have to worry about meeting her parents but it’s actually her THREE overprotective older sisters he should really look out for.

The Tournament-

Request: After the tournament the reader is there when Kreese does what he does to Johnny and she basically steps in and helps him then she takes him home to comfort him.

Mean Girls-

Request: So Johnny Lawrence’s girlfriend has a Regina George-esque personality and is the queen bee of the school. You either love, hate or fear her. There’s no in between. Johnny and Reader are basically the power couple of the school.

Parent Trap-

Request: Johnny Lawrence and the Reader had been married for years; even had a son, Robby. The two end up separating due to Johnny’s drinking and unreliability. But over the years Johnny and Reader are still completely in love and the Reader completely refuses to admit her feelings towards Johnny. Until Robby, Miguel, Hawk, and Demetri invite the Reader to dinner at Johnny’s place. Will the Reader finally admit her feelings or leave with even more bitterness and hurt feelings?

Just Like You-

Request: Reader is Johnny’s daughter, Robby’s half sister. Reader was a result of a one night stand after his break up with Shannon, Reader lives with Johnny and joined Cobra Kai but left due to Johnny losing it to Kreese. Reader, Miguel, and Sam show up to the dojo after Daniel and Johnny’s fight with Kreese. As Johnny is driving back home with Reader the song, “Just Like You” by Three Days Grace starts to play and it reminds Johnny of Kreese.

Back Bone-

Request: Johnny Lawrence and his girlfriend are complete opposites. Reader is a gentle, soft-spoken and cool headed girl (she kinda has luna lovegood’s chill demeanour) who rarely raises her voice and is the only one capable of calming down Johnny’s fiery temper. But one day at school, some idiot decides to say nasty things to Reader who loses her shit and starts to drag this person to FILTH. Meanwhile in the sidelines, Johnny is watching the drama unfold and is acting like a bigass simp and everyone else is like “DAMN” with their jaws dropped.

Allergy Season-

Request: I have a request for a young johnny lawrence x female reader where either hes like sick or hurt and reader has to take care of him. i think that’d be so cute!

Young!Johnny Headcanons-

Request: Can I request a young Johnny Lawrence x Reader but the reader has a very similar personality to Moon headcanons?

Sensei Lawrence-

Request: My request is she’s a newer friend of miguel’s, they became friends just after highschool, anyway he spends most of his time helping out at the dojo (just usually helping johnny teach n shit like that) and she tags along and meets johnny for the first time, basically she’s a total smart ass/loud mouth type person and johnny’s got a crush on her but she doesn’t give off any indication that she likes him back. so as time goes on, she keeps joining miguel whenever he goes to help out and johnny kind of teaches her one on one (but she’s picked up a few tricks) and basically she manages to pin johnny down and is like “because i won, you have to take me on a date.” and he’s staring up at her with the biggest shit eating grin on face.

Rocky Beginnings-

Requests: I was wondering if you can write a story about Johnny and this reader (y/n) having kind of rocky start because she is Danny’s younger sister by like one year younger and like at the Halloween dance they say somethings and then the day after during the dojo confrontation. And— Hey can you just do some super fluffy Johnny x reader ?

The Perfect Fit-

Request: Robby and reader are twins. Reader and Robby are sent to live with Johnny after Shannon goes to rehab. Now they’re all grown up and the reader is now engaged and looking for the perfect wedding dress on the TV show, “Say Yes to the Dress.” But to her surprise, Johnny is more opinionated than she thought.

Lawrusso:

Burning Heart -

Summary: A short little something I wrote about Johnny and Daniel being just a tad bit too gay and the students start to catch on.

Operation Bro Lunch -

Summary: Hawk and Demetri notice somethings going on between their Sensei’s so they decide to do something about it.

Robby Keene:

Melt With You -

Request: cute Robby x reader request? Something like the girl and Robby really like each other. (Secretly in love but won’t admit it) Long story short she finds Robby after he gets beat up and she helps him…heal up. Helps him bandage up his wounds and cuts. Eventually she confesses she loves him. He confesses it back.

Forever Young -

Summary: Bullied reader meets the new kid, Robby Keene, and he offers to give her karate lessons.

Trespassing-

Request: can you please do a story where the reader is the adoptive daughter of the LaRusso’s; she finds out her bio dad is Terry Silver and her love interest is Robby.

You Owe Me-

Request: could you please do a story where the reader is hawk's little sister and is also in a relationship w/ Robby? I think it'd be interesting to see them fighting behind the reader's back (cause if she sees them, She gets mad at both of them).

Bridezilla-

Request: Can you do a one-shot where Robby got his G.E.D. and left Cobra Kai, he is now a 20-something year old and is building a better life for himself, the reader is his girlfriend and a wedding planner, and he visits her at work and finds out her newest client is a bridezilla? He would have no time for that nonsense lol

Robby Keene x Plus Size!Reader Headcanons-

Request: I never see any plus sized reader stuff for Robby, coming from a plus sized girl kinda makes me feel left out in ways. So I was wondering if you could like write some hcs for plus sized reader x Robby that would mean the world to me!!!

Eternal Flame-

Request: Rehash of some events from Season 5 but with reader x Robby. (Kinda same CK Plot with some creative liberties)

Party-

Request: How about Robby meeting the reader for the first time at a party and she's super bubbly and fun, having a good time. They end up bumping into each other and spending the whole rest of the party getting to know each other and he just falls for her so hard, like physically attracted to her gorgeous plus sized body but also her confidence

Daniel Larusso:

Close Call-

Request: can you make a Daniel x Reader oneshot but the reader has a Jules Vaughn personality their just really happy, calm and bubbly person but sometimes they easily get angry, soo Reader and Daniel were biking together till the cobras tried to mess with Daniel reader had enough and stood up for him like literally pulling out a tazer while shouting at them the cobras got terrified and left, they got home and layed down on the readers bed talking about stuff while they looked at each other then they eventually kiss??

Joel Miller:

Secret Feelings -

Summary: cliché can’t admit feelings for each other and Ellie isn’t having it.

Sharing The Night-

Summary: Reader shows up on Joel’s doorstep after being injured. (18+, a bit spicy)

Dalton Lambert:

Autumn Nights:

Summary: Reader, Chris, and Dalton go to a Halloween party but feelings start to quickly unravel as the night progresses.

[bluedeedeedoop]

YAYA thank you for tagging me @kalevalakryze!!!!

What's the origin of your blog's title?: I mean- okay i made it back when i still had my deadname but all i had to do was change it to "blue's" instead of "deadname" BUT i feel like "blue's fandom junk" speaks for itself..

Favorite Fandoms: as of now, fs star wars (specifically the barrissoka side because i'm pretty particular and somewhat crazy i fear) as well as star wars Andor cuz yeah, warrior cats but i only spectate from afar, aaaand honestly thats pretty much my life.

OTP(S) + shipname:

BARRISSOKAAAA. (Barriss Offee/Ahsoka Tano)

Nitearmor!! (The Armorer/Bo Katan Kryze)

Wolfwren!! (Shin Hati/Sabine Wren)

Velcinta!! (Vel Sartha/Cinta Kaz)

Mon Mothma/MEEEEEE /hj

honestly i cant think of any others at this current moment in time.. but theres prob more

Favorite Color: Blue (shocker) but specifically like cornflower blue or periwinkle

Favorite Game: ermmm does a modded version of ClanGen count..? if not maybe Wolfquest..? dude i havent been locked in with games in a while unfortunately

Song stuck in your head: No Surprises, but specifically a cover version by Juliana Chahayed

Weirdest habit/trait: Unfortunately i touch my hair and face a lot as a form of stimming, it does not end up doing good for my skin and hair SOBBING.

Hobbies: Mostly creative stuff, drawing, crocheting, embroidery sometimes, reading, bird watching, i cant think of anything else-

If you could have any job you wish what would it be?: please let me be a birdkeeper please please please please. like a behavioralist or some shit, working hands on with the little dinos

Something you're good at: making people annoyed at me

Something you're bad at: math

Something you excel at: doomscrolling

Something you love: drawing!!

Something you could talk about for hours without off the cuff: Warrior cats and star wars lore

Something you hate: to avoid getting burnt at the stake im staying silent

Something you collect: oddities and random nature objects!

Something you forget: to do my textbook readings for the next class but it is what it is (i technically still have time i mean what no i dont)

hat's your love language?: Ive been told what i offer is acts of service and quality time, but what i crave is both of those and physical touch

Favorite movie/show: god how the fuck do i choose one. uhh ig Wolfwalkers and then Star Wars (andor rn)

Favorite food: idk tbh but foods im usually always comfortable with are fries.

Favorite animal: Emperor Penguins! and Wolves! also just birds in general

Are you musical?: yeah sure why not

Favorite subject in school: back in grade school typically art. but rn im only taking my VTA course so i guuuuess animal care and management?

Least favorite subject: fucking MATH

What's your best character trait?: prob loyalty to my beliefs and ambition to try new things

Worst character trait: I can get over obsessive about small things that will drive me crazy... also i can go silent when i should be voicing what im feeling but yk

If you could change any detail of your day right now,what would it be?: that my tattoos are perfectly healed and its not just the day after i got them

If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet?: shit uh.. idk tbh. prob my mom when i was a toddler to beg her to not give up on teaching me and my sibling spanish because of public school pushing english

Recommend one of your favorite fanfics: honestly so hard for me to choose but i always say "And if we Fell Together" by @kaaragen will always be way up there for me. good god the amount of souls i'd reap to make this into an animated series.

thank you again for tagging me i love doing these!! no pressure tags!: @eleventhsister @eightbitpale @lesbianforlottie

and any of my other moots who see this btw!!

Getting to know your mutuals

I was tagged by @kroganloveinterest

Thank you for the tag! ❤️

What's the origin of your blog's title?

Cayde-6 is my favorite Destiny character (shocking,I know) and so I just meshed the acronym Bae (Before Anyone Else) and Cayde's name together.

Favorite Fandoms:

Cracks knuckles In no particular order: Destiny,(Old School) Disney,(mostly old school)Star Wars (The Mandalorian was fantastic),Elder Scrolls,Tolkien,Firefly, Baldur's Gate 3,Fable,Witcher,Dragon Age,Marvel,Batman,The Mummy,Indiana Jones,Mass Effect,Once Upon a Time,The Legend of Zelda,Back to the Future and almost anything involving Dragons. I really like dragons.

OTP(S) + shipname:

Dang,do we still do ship names?

Captain Swan from Once Upon a Time.

SHAKARIAN (Shepard and Garrus Vakarian otp,Mass Effect "No Shepard without Vakarian".)

Alistair and the Grey Warden (Dragon Age Origins,not sure what the ship name is)

FenHawke (Fenris/Hawke Dragon Age II)

Trevelyan and Cullen (Dragon Age Inquisition)

And every single oc I have with their respective partners. I don't really have ship names for any of them though,and even though my Hunter is probably my most fleshed out oc that I have,it's not like she has a fanbase that can name the ship(s) for me. 😂

(Tae+Cayde?Taelia + Crow? Idk don't judge me, I've never thought that hard about it.Taelia and Crow are both pretty bird themed though... I'm going to have to think about this now aren't I...?)

Favorite Color:

Blue,Pink,Purple,and Green.

(I know it says "color" as in a singular color,but I do what I want.)

Favorite Game: I've played Skyrim a ridiculous amount of times so probably Skyrim or Ocarina of Time.

Song stuck in your head:Mr.Brightside is usually a safe bet.That song lives rent free in my head for some reason.

(Higher Ground by Imagine Dragons is also in there a lot.)

Weirdest habit/trait:I'll do random impressions/accents sometimes. My friends seem to enjoy it though so that's all that matters to me. Sometimes they join in.❤️

Hobbies:Playing videogames with friends,reading,singing,watching movies. I used to paint and sketch,but I don't really do that anymore...I really should because I miss it,even if it's just for me.

If you could have any job you wish what would it be?

Something that makes me happy. Something involving art of some kind/where I have a creative outlet.✨

Something you're good at:

Being humble.✨

Something you're bad at:

Opening up to people about stuff that actually matters. Letting myself be vulnerable. So if I've let myself be vulnerable,even just a little around you, congratulations,you somehow started to break the surface of my nearly impenetrable emotional walls,keep chipping away and maybe you'll get somewhere one day. 👈👈😎

Something you excel at:

Making people laugh and being a good friend. It might not mean much to other people,but I'm proud of that. I know I'm the friend that I would want even though it's not always reciprocated/taken for granted by my friends.

Something you love:

Making people laugh.

Something you could talk about for hours without off the cuff:

(See fandoms above.)

Something you hate:I don't really hate anything...wait...this is ridiculously specific,but Tanlorin's hair in ESO. I can't with that stupid hair. I hate it with a burning passion.It's too modern for me for a High fantasy mmorpg.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

That and when guys act like girls can't/don't know how to play videogames I've had guys literally try to  "teach" me things about games I've been playing longer than them. They also knew this when they asked.

I once had a guy ask me if I wanted him to walk me through the entirety (and I do mean the entirety) of BG3 (Hi! Hello! Regular honor mode player here.👋✨) and one asked me if I knew Skyrim had mods and if I knew how to install them. (This was after I told him how I had been playing Skyrim,at the time, for 5+ years.)

Something you collect: Nerd merch. I have a lot of Loki related items and different Funko pops. I also have a Ghost replica that lights up (not to mention a lot of nerd shirts/sweatshirts including a Cayde-6 one.)

Something you forget:

I'm not really sure. If I forget anything I must have forgotten it. 😉

(I have a good memory. So not much tbh.)

What's your love language?: Probably all, if we're being honest.

Favorite movie/show:

Movie:The Lion King (the original, not the cgi one)

Show:I've watched both Once Upon a Time and Firefly a ridiculous amount of times. Like...I know the dialogue as I'm watching it ridiculous (At least the first season of Once,I didn't memorize all of the seasons 😂).

Favorite food: Probably pizza? 🍕 

Favorite animal:I really like Lions,Tigers and Wolves. Owls are my favorite bird.

Are you musical?: I was a theater kid growing up.I was in musicals and talent shows. I sing still. In school I played piano,drums,steel drums, trombone and guitar. Now I mostly use those talents as a bard in RP/videogames.😅 (A friend of mine and I recently watched the d&d movie and when the bard appeared she pointed at the screen and said "It's you!")

Favorite subject in school:English and music both have my heart.❤️

Least favorite subject:Math.

What's your best character trait?: I'm kind and just a really caring,loving person.

Worst character trait: That kindness does not extend to myself most of the time.

If you could change any detail of your day right now,what would it be?

A portal would open to one of my favorite fictional worlds near me.

If you could travel in time,who would you like to meet?

David Bowie,Robin Williams,Bob Ross,Steve Irwin,or for completely unrelated reasons,as of this post,Nathan Fillion about 20 years ago.👀

Recommend one of your favorite fanfics:

I don't really read fanfics that often. My friends send me a lot of their oc lore (one time a friend sent me 34 pages worth),so that.I love reading about my friend's OC's. As always,if anyone has recommendations,feel free to let me know.

I also have writer mutuals on here and I read their stories when I can.❤️

@imonthemoonitsmadeofcheese and @nova-rosa

I think I got all of the questions. I had to copy/paste them individually so I might have missed a couple,if I did,I apologize,it was late when I started doing these. 👀

I'm going to tag (but do not feel obligated to answer,just thinking about you.❤️) @crimsonmischief @dredgen-dumbass @imonthemoonitsmadeofcheese @nova-rosa @khaoticspartan @beyond-the-light @taniks-the-final-shape

Phew. I need a cup of coffee now.☕

[orange-waterfalls]

I Call This One: Bold & Brash!

The egos x artist! gn! reader

ty @pokemonpunqueen for the request!

A/N: I’ve decided that I’m gonna write for the egos when I can’t think of anything else or I need practice writing lmao. I mean I was doing that before? But I didn’t know it? listen it’s fine it’ll be fine but FOR NOW I thiiiink I’m gonna take requests. Just a few. I’ll stop when I think it gets too much. This is exactly what it says. I focused on like drawing/painting for “artist”, with some references to animation thrown in there. I did Darkiplier, Wilford, Yancy, Illinois, Google, Eric, and a Host thrown in there bc I love him and I miss him

Word count is 1.5k

Enjoy

Egos x artist!reader

Darkiplier

He’ll want to commission art from you

He makes comments about how Mark is a narcissist but also he’s a narcissist.

Oh look, Dark’s asking you for another picture. What does he want? He wants you to draw him? Again? For the fifth time this fucking month? Wonderful.

He likes looking at how you make art of him, be it stylistic or realistic

He will hang them up all over the fucking house so pace yourself

He’s fine if you draw anybody else

Except Mark. Never Mark. How can he tell, you ask? No fucking clue, but he does

Gets a bit worried that you won’t make enough money to live comfortably

Just because not everyone needs a fucking MANSION-

Will always buy things for you if you ask

Likes to be able to support your job or hobby

Sugar daddy? I mean maybe

Makes sure you eat, sleep, drink water, survive--

Leaves snacks for you at your desk for when you don’t want a meal.

Carries you to bed if you fall asleep at a desk

Recommends you wear comfy clothes at all times so you can fall asleep wherever

A bit of an enabler, he’s doing his best tho

If you take commissions don’t be surprised if he threatens to kill someone when they don’t pay or are rude to you

He loves you, that’s all

Wilford

Fucking elated

Draw him!!! Please!!!! Please draw him!!!!! He has coin!!!!! He can pay!!!!!

Ecstatic if you actually draw him like he’ll giggle for an hour straight just looking

Secretly commissions more art from you

So also sugar daddy

It’s always something so obvious so you know it’s him anyways

He likes bright colors and eyestrain for some reason

If you make that, he just. Stares at it. Unblinking. You have to snap him out of it (im not projecting what do you mean)

Gets extremely worried about you not taking care of yourself

Gets someone to fucking babysit you when he’s gone so you take care of yourself

When you get greatly offended by this he settles for texting you reminders

And when you ignore those he texts more

Don’t be surprised if you get spammed by several people and an alarm starts to play from somewhere in the house

You’re gonna be healthy whether you like it or not, asshole

Drags you to bed aggressively

He WILL NOT drug your food with melatonin because that’s illegal. B U T-

He’s a little confused, but he got the spirit

Will advertise your art to anyone and everyone and also on his show and threatens the audience with a gun

AGAIN, a little confused. he just wuvs u so much 

Yancy

I mean technically he’s kind of an artist too so he appreciates your skill and creativity

He’s very nosy and likes to look over your shoulder while you work

If you don’t like him doing that, he still does it, just more secretively

Likes to work in the same room as you. 

That is if you don’t mind constant singing or tap dancing in the background

He shows off your art to anyone and everyone and gets mad if they don’t immediately say it’s fantastic

May or may not have stabbed someone over it, you’ll never know

If you show him something you’re working on, he’ll show you something he’s working on in return

The law of equivalent exchange

You tell him you can make MONEY from things like art and dancing and he goes apeshit he gets so fucking excited

If you’re like an animator and offer to animate his dancing he might actually cry

He’ll deny it constantly every day until he dies

If you make things traditionally he hangs them on the wall Everywhere

You might run out of room

By which i mean you will run out of room as soon as possible

Will never tell you a drawing is bad ever unless it’s like Really Bad which it never will be in his eyes

He loves anything and everything you do u are so precious

You have a permanent support system within the man

Google

Used to see art as pointless

Then comprehended the chemical release it causes in the brain and thought that was fine

Then saw you get really mad with something you were working on and got confused again?

If art no make good chemical, why art?

He still doesn’t understand, but that’s ok

You tried to get him to make something once

He just. Kinda. Made a buncha ones and zeroes

You still framed it and hung in on the wall and he got embarrassed

If he could blush, he would

If you draw him he looks like he doesn’t care but it’s at that point he decides he would die for you

Primary objective: answer questions as quickly as possible. Secondary objective: make u happy. Tertiary objective is to destroy mankind

If you draw bing that will disappear IMMEDIATELY you have BETRAYED him

If you ask for a color palette recommendation he Always says the google colors. Always.

You might’ve thought he was going for an rgby type of thing. But then you realize.

He is in charge of your financing. He will tell you the most efficient ways to make money as an artist and you follow then

He is also in charge of making sure you FUCKING EAT A MEAL

“But isn’t an objective to destroy mankind?” shut up he’s not happy about it either

Despite his best efforts he loves you and that ain’t gonna change

Illinois

Doesn’t fully understand

He needs to be outside at all times and cannot stay in one place

And you’re like??? Required to stay still???? For prolonged amounts of time????? Disgusting. Anyway, whatcha workin’ on?

He might ask you to try and teach him

If you do try he gives up almost immediately

Sometimes you just get so into it that you forget to do basic things and he gets upset

(i.e. eating, sleeping, living, etc.)

He gets worried about you

He is a hypocrite bc he does the same

He will drag you to bed, motherfucker

Honestly he might lock your shit somewhere until you fucking take care of yourself. it’s like a hostage situation god

“Where the fuck did you put it” “I have no clue what you mean. I might know if you eat your dinner, though”

Asshole (affectionate)

Sometimes you like make faces when you try to draw a person and it’s hilarious and cute to him

He looks at your drawings the moment you walk away but acts like he doesn’t care

He cares a lot

Will support you no matter what but will also tell you without hesitation if he thinks something looks shit

Listen he’s out of line but he’s right

Eric

Loves you a lot and will support anything and everything you choose to do or make

Drawing? Awesome! Painting? Wonderful! Animation? Superb!

He often wants to buy you supplies or something but he does not know what anything is

Fuck is a chalk pencil???? What are gel pens vs normal pens?????? Watercolor????? What the fuck are you saying??????????

Will subtly drop hints that you could,,,, draw him,,,,, maybe,,,,, if u wanna 

And by subtly I mean he starts to ask and then starts crying

If you draw him he will cry again he loves u so much 

If he ever were to get a tattoo it’d be something u drew. Nothing else is as important to him at the moment

He enjoys photography and film, and likes to try and bond with you over artistic things

I mean. Some things overlap.

You could talk about a single drawing for hours and he’d listen intently the whole time

Don’t ask him for feedback, it’s always some version of “it’s perfect and I love you”

Even if he hates it

Which,,,,, he might hate it sometimes

He’s not a good reviewer. 2/10, very biased

He likes to take photos when you’re in the zone

If you tell him to delete them he will

While secretly making one his home screen

Host

Hey, he gets it

He writes, he understands the hyperfocus

Sometimes he wouldn’t move from his chair for a day because he was busy writing a script

That being said, you probably have to be the one to get him to take care of himself

Or you have to take turns

Otherwise you’re both gonna fucking die

He asks you to describe your art to him and tries to picture it.

He’ll tell you if he thinks it probably looks good or bad

You shouldn’t take it to heart because he can’t see it

He is a bastard sometimes

“Well, what do you think?” “I think it looks fantastic” “Thanks, babe” “...” “... you think you’re fucking funny, don’t you”

He asks if you can draw him sometimes

No, he won’t see it, but he’ll appreciate the sentiment if you do

He will ask for your opinion on his scripts sometimes

If you say it’s bad he gets really defensive

You work in the same room a lot of the time and forget the other is there

One of you has to preemptively order food or like set a timer so you can goddamn Survive

You’ll be fine

[watchmegetobsessed]

TO LOVE AND BE LOVED - Part Three (Harry Styles)

a/n: part 3 wohoo! thank you so much for all the love you’ve been showing the series, it keeps me going and writing more and more! originally i thought it would turn out to be about three parts, but it has outgrown that limit so i added two more parts to the masterpost, that’s for sure is gonna happen but i might even add more?! not sure, im still in the writing process so i can’t tell how long it’s going to turn out to be, but this just means even more content for you guys!

as always, feedback is very much appreciated, please make sure to share your thoughts and comments on the part, it’s such a huge boost for writers to read what you thought!!

pairing: CEO!Dad!Harry X Reader

warning: mentions of death, cheating and divorce

word count: 11.4k

SERIES MASTERPOST masterlist

When you were working at the daycare you couldn’t focus on photography as much as you would have liked to. You often had to stay in for extra hours, wait until the last kid was picked up and then do paperwork, or change the decoration in your room or whatever Clair asked you to do that day. By the time you got home you just wanted to take a bath and fall into bed. You also had to travel 40 minutes to work which took away a lot of time from your day.

Working for Harry helped you immensely with focusing more on your passion. Even on his worse days he got home by six and since your workplace is your home, you don’t even have to drive forty minutes to enjoy the comfort of your home, you just walk up the stairs to your room and that’s it.

In addition, taking care of Izzy, you still have the chance to work on some editing or snap new pictures. You have time off when she has her classes and when you put her down for her nap. The best thing is that Izzy is quite interested in photography, she gets very interested whenever she sees you bring out one of your cameras and she always lets you take pictures of her, posing and goofing around. The folder on your computer that has her name is growing each day with more and more sweet photos of the little girl that has completely stolen your heart. You’ve been regularly getting your favorites shots of her printed and you always leave them on Harry’s desk so when he gets home he sees them and they make him forget about whatever happened at work that day.

You are getting more and more emails about possible sessions and slowly but surely, your weekends start to fill up with weddings, birthday parties and engagement photoshoots. It seems like you have definitely made the right choice when you took this job. No doubts.

“Can I ask a question, daddy?” Izzy is poking the peas around on her plate as the four of you sit at the dining table at dinner. Ruth has joined you today, because Harry had to make a quick trip to his office in the afternoon and you were out shopping with Trevor today.

“Sure, baby,” Harry hums nodding.

“Why don’t you eat meat?” she asks seriously, eyeing her own plate that has some chicken on it, while Harry’s is only stacked with veggies and potatoes.

“Because I decided that I won’t want to.”

“Can I decide that too?”

“You’re a little too young for that, baby. You need the meat to grow big. When you’re older you can think about what kind of things you want to and don’t want to eat.”

“Okay,” she nods without throwing a tantrum about her dad telling her no. You know quite a few kids who would have flipped over it, but not Izzy. Harry might not even realize how good of a job he is doing raising her and teaching her how to be a good human.

“I have another question,” she announces, glancing up at Harry.

“Go ahead.”

“If you don’t eat meat, does that make you an herbivore?”

You can’t push down a chuckle, you were not expecting this. Your eyes meet Ruth’s over the table, she is enjoying this conversation just as much as you do. It’s cute how Izzy put two and two together and made a seemingly logical conclusion.

“We learned about herbivore dinosaurs this week,” you inform Harry, who is a little lost about why his daughter just called him an herbivore. Also, you’re quite impressed that she remembered the word, though she struggled with it at first, but it seems like it finally stuck.

Harry shakes his head chuckling as he sets his fork down, looking over at Izzy.

“In a way I should be called an herbivore, but that’s not what you call people who don’t eat meat. I’m a vegetarian.”

“Oh, okay,” she nods, wrapping up the information in her head as she keeps eating.

You and Ruth clean up after dinner while Harry gives Izzy a bath, a little earlier than usually, because she spilled apple juice on herself, so he decided to just go straight for the bath instead of changing once more before bedtime.

“Will you be fine with putting these away, Darling?” Ruth asks as you’re drying the last few dishes.

“Sure! I’ll take care of it,” you smile back at her as she nods and heads into the living room.

Harry emerges from upstairs with a freshly cleaned Izzy on his arms. As soon as her little feet touch the floor she bolts over to join Ruth in front of the TV while Harry walks into the kitchen just as you put the last dish away.

“Hey, there’s something I wanted to talk to you about,” he starts and suddenly, you feel your stomach drop, especially because his face seems very serious.

“Oh God, what did I do?” you ask, feeling yourself panicking already.

“Nothing! It’s not like that!” he chuckles softly, realizing you kind of misunderstood the situation.

“Okay, good. Sorry, you just looked so serious.”

“Sorry, I was just… thinking. So two friends of mine that I work together with also are getting married soon. They had a photographer booked already, but the guy cancelled on them and, um, I hope you don’t mind, but I recommended you to them.”

“Really?” you ask in complete surprise.

“Yeah. Actually, they saw a picture of Izzy that you took in my office and we started talking about how you do photoshoots in your free time and then I told them to ask if you’d be up to do their wedding as well.”

“Wow, that’s really nice of you, Harry. Thank you!”

“I gave them your number, they’ll probably call you sometime next week or so.”

“Great!” you beam, excited about the new event you can work at. “I hope they’ll want to work with me.”

“I kind of hyped you up for them and they seemed very pleased with the pictures I showed them, so I’m sure they will want to,” Harry chuckles softly, even blushing a little. It always amazes you how a tall, muscular guy with so many tattoos can be such a soft, caring and loving person. It always reminds you not to judge the book by its cover.

“Thank you, Harry. This means a lot to me.” Reaching over you place your hand on his arm and give it a gentle squeeze before moving past him to join Ruth and Izzy in the living room.

Harry was right about Sarah and Mitch being all excited to get in contact with you, because they don’t even wait for the next week to reach out. Sunday afternoon you are working on some more editing at the dining table while Harry and Izzy are painting on the other end of the table, busy with their masterpieces when your phone starts ringing, an unknown number shown on the screen.

“Y/N Y/L/N,” you answer it, leaning back in your seat.

“Y/N, hi! My name is Sarah Jones, I hope I’m not calling at a bad time, Harry gave me your number this week.”

“Oh! Sarah, yeah! So nice to talk to you!” you beam and Harry’s eyes snap up to you at the mentioning of the familiar name. “Harry mentioned you’d reach out and don’t worry, I’m happy to chat.”

“That’s great. I wanted to wait until Monday, but truth is that we are kind of in a short of time and I was afraid you’d be already busy for our date, so I wanted to call you as soon as possible.”

“No worries.”

“So first and foremost, I’m gonna ask if you have anything planned on the last weekend of May. I know it’s just in a few weeks, but I really hope we can work it out.”

“Let me pull up my calendar,” you tell her as you open up the app on your computer that you use to keep track with your sessions and events. Finding the weekend in question in it, you smile at the empty space. “Good news, seems like I’m free that weekend.”

“Oh thank God!” she breathes out in relief and you let out a chuckle. “That’s so amazing. So then would it be possible to meet up sometime next week? You could show some more works of yours and we can discuss more details, how does that sound?”

“This week? Well I have to work—“ you start, but Harry cuts you off.

“Come into the office tomorrow morning.” “What?”

“Put her on speaker,” he smiles nodding towards your phone and you do as he asked, setting it to the table with Sarah on speaker. “Hey Sarah!”

“Harry, hi!”

“Aunt Sarah?” Izzy’s ears perk up, some pink paint on her cheeks that you have no idea how it got there, because her painting doesn’t even have any pink in it.

“Hi Izzy! So good to hear your voice!” she chuckles through the phone.

“Sarah, you’re gonna be at the studio Monday morning, right?” Harry asks and you can’t not notice how his voice changed the slightest bit as soon as he started talking about business.

“Yeah and Mitch is coming too,” she confirms.

“Okay then how about you come in tomorrow morning, Y/N?”

“But what about Izzy?”

“She can come too. I’ll look after her while you discuss the details, it’s no big deal. It’s been a while since the last time she came to work with me,” he smirks over at the little girl, who is already excited to spend some more time with her daddy at his workplace.

“Are you sure about that?”

“Absolutely,” he nods smiling.

“Thank you, well then I’m okay with tomorrow if it’s fine for you as well, Sarah.”

“That would be perfect! Thank you guys both, Mitch and I really appreciate it.”

“No worries,” Harry nods, going back to his painting. You take Sarah off the phone as you say your goodbye before ending the call.

You start Monday off with some extra excitement. Not just because you are about to get booked for another event, but also because it’s going to be the first time you see Harry at his workplace. He has been quite good at keeping his business separated from his private life, it never really happens that you catch him dwell about anything work related whenever he is home and around Izzy. The phone call with Sarah was like a tiny glimpse of what he might be like when he is in work mode and you’re kind of curious to see more of this side of him.

Just as usual, Harry takes care of Izzy in the morning while you get ready on your own. You want to look good, not only are you going to meet more of his friends, but people he works with. Or should you say, people who work for him.

You choose a light pink dress, throwing a white knitted sweater over your shoulders with a pair of ballerinas. After putting on some light makeup and grabbing your purse and laptop you head downstairs to grab a quick breakfast. Izzy is already sitting at the table, still in her pajamas since her and food are a dangerous combination and Harry always makes sure to get her dressed once she is away from all of that.

“You look so pretty, Y/N!” she beams, her legs dangling from the chair as she digs into her oatmeal. Harry appears from the kitchen and he has the same look on his face like when he saw you leave for that wedding a while ago. A blush paints his cheeks as he slows his steps down, his eyes running down on the length of your body before they return to your face.

“Izzy is right, you look… really pretty, Y/N,” he compliments into your face, unlike last time when you only heard him call you pretty when he thought you were long gone.

“Thank you,” you breathe out with a soft chuckle.

The morning carries on as usual, Harry dresses Izzy for the day and then you all head out, however you stop short upon seeing the various cars parked on the driveway and the double garage.

“Maybe take the Rover, it’s got the child seat in it and I’ll take the Jaguar today,” Harry suggests as he hands you over the keys to the Rover and then nears the car he is taking for the day.

“Oh yeah, you just take the Jaguar, boss,” you chuckle under your breath, finding it a little funny that deciding on which car you’re taking for the day is even a question in someone else’s life.

Izzy sings along the radio as you follow Harry’s car into the label’s building. Of course, it’s not just some simple office building, it’s situated in the riches area of the city and the building is massive with loads of floors and a huge HES Records sign above the entrance where you meet Harry after parking down.

“Good morning, Mr. Styles! Hello, Izzy!” the woman behind the front desk smiles widely immediately, standing up from her chair to hand Harry a stack of envelopes. “Your post, sir.”

“Thank you, Veronica. Have a nice day,” Harry nods in her way as the three of you move through the hall to the elevators. Waiting for it to arrive, you glance at the board on the wall that lists everything you can find in the building and the level you should look for it at. There are endless amount of studios, at least three on each levels, offices, creative rooms and conference rooms. It’s pretty clear that HES Records manages a lot of talents and that requires a lot of space.

Arriving to the twentieth floor, which is of course the top of the building, you are in awe as you realize that the whole floor is basically Harry’s office. There’s a kind of hall area for his two assistants, he has his own conference room, his kitchen and dining area and of course, his office space. The whole place screams power and influence. The modern design of the interior makes it such a fancy work space not just for him, but for everyone else in the building. It’s truly impressive.

“Wow, Harry. This place is… amazing,” you breathe out as he walks the two of you into the conference room where Izzy immediately climbs up to one of the chairs, standing up so she can lean onto the table. Harry walks behind her and adjusts her so she just sits before she could fall off.

“Thank you. I really like this place too. I always thought it’s important to have a great place to work at,” he smiles, clearly proud of how far his business has come. “There’s a mini fridge over there, feel free to take anything you’d like. Sarah texted me on the way here that they’ll be here shortly.”

“Great, thank you,” you nod, taking a seat next to Izzy as you set your laptop up. The glass door of the room opens and one of the assistants peeks inside.

“Mr. Styles, Mrs. Wonstein is on the phone asking for you.”

“Oh, alright, give me a minute and I’ll take it.” The assistant nods and walks out. “Izzy, come with daddy a little, alright? Let Y/N do her thing.” “She can stay, if you want. I can look after her,” you tell him, but he shakes his head as Izzy climbs off the chair and running over to him, she takes his hand.

“No, just focus on this one. I’ll take care of her, don’t worry.”

“Thank you, Harry,” you smile with gratitude as the two of them walk out, leaving you alone. You start scrolling through your folders, wondering which photos you should show Sarah and Mitch, picking out some of your favorites while you wait for them, though they don’t take too long to arrive. Soon enough the glass door opens and the lovely couple walks in.

“Y/N! Hi, it’s so nice to finally meet you!” Sarah greets you, wrapping you in a warm hug before stepping aside.

“Hi, I’m Mitch, nice to meet you,” the groom-to-be smiles shyly as he pulls you in for a short hug as well.

“Good to meet you guys too,” you smile back at them as you all sit to the table.

“Thank you so much for meeting us in such a short notice. Our photographer bailed out on us and I was starting to really worry when Harry mentioned that you are doing this kind of stuff in your free time,” Sarah explains.

“No worries. Would you like to go over some of my previous works?” you offer and they both nod in excitement before you start clicking through some old projects.

They share their vision for the whole wedding and the kind of pictures they would like and you like their approach and feel like it’s right up your alley. They both seem to like what you show them and Sarah compliments on how well you are able to catch small, but important moments.

“The wedding won’t be too big, just friends and family, but we do want a lot of memories, it means a lot to us,” Sarah explains and you nod, noting everything she says.

“Harry said you like this oldschool kind of vibe in your pictures,” Mitch chimes in.

“Oh, yeah. I like to make them look like they weren’t taken on a digital sometimes.”

“Do you think you can make some of those for us as well? Not all of them, just a couple,” Sarah asks.

“Sure! It’s more about the editing process, but it’s totally doable.”

You go over a few more things, making sure you’re on the same page, but you feel like things are working out perfectly. Though you guessed they would be great people, it’s still nice to work with such a nice and professional couple. You’ve had some crazy ones before, they definitely don’t make the job easy on you, but it’s not the case right now.

“Okay, so are you sure the date is okay for you? We wouldn’t want you to cancel on anything you had before just because we are Harry’s friends,” Mitch assures you, but you give them a warm smile.

“I’m totally free, don’t worry. Harry doesn’t have that kind of advantage here,” you chuckle softly.

“Thank you so much in this case. You’re truly a lifesaver,” Sarah breathes out in relief.

“Thank you for the trust. I’m really looking forward to working with you guys!”

Finishing up the meeting you pack up, chatting a little out of the business talk with Sarah and Mitch as you head over to Harry’s office.

“Hey! How did it go?” Harry asks as soon as the three of you walk in. Izzy is sitting at his desk, like a little boss, coloring something as he is sitting on the corner of the desk.

“Amazing, we owe you one for suggesting her,” Sarah sighs and you can’t help but just chuckle at how thankful she really is that you could help them out.

“You owe me no more than just one dance at the wedding,” Harry smiles at her.

“Can I dance too?” Izzy’s head perks up.

“Oh baby, you’re not coming to the wedding. You’ll be staying with Grandma, I already told you.” Izzy pouts at her dad, but she doesn’t seem to mind it that much, she quickly goes back to coloring.

“We’ll dance some other time, okay?” Sarah offers her and she nods happily.

“Can I dance with Uncle Mitch too?” she questions and Mitch just smiles down at her.

“Of course,” he hums, curling an arm around Sarah’s waist. “I have a meeting in ten so I’ll head out, I’m gonna pick James up in the afternoon, alright?” He kisses Sarah’s temple before pulling Harry into a brotherly hug. “Y/N, it was so nice to meet you and thank you for everything again,” he smiles at you, enveloping you in a quick hug as well.

“See you soon,” you smile back before he waves his last goodbye and leaves. “Who’s James?” you ask curiously.

“James is our son. He is turning three this year,” Sarah beams proudly.

“Oh! You two already have a son, that’s great! I’ll make sure to snap a bunch of photos of him too,” you chuckle.

“Please, our house is already packed with pictures, but there’s just never enough,” Sarah laughs.

The three of you chat a little longer while Izzy is busy with her coloring, talking about the wedding and whatnot, Harry invites her and Mitch over for dinner sometime and she happily says yes before business is calling her so she heads out as well.

“Okay, come one, little Sunshine. Let’s get home, Rosaline will be over soon for your piano lesson,” you smile down at Izzy who throws all her coloring stuff into one of Harry’s drawers before hopping off the leather seat.

“I’ll see you in the afternoon, okay?” Harry leans down and kisses the top of her head before pressing his lips to her cheek as well.

“Bye daddy, have a good day!” she calls out, grabbing your hand as you head to the door, Harry following behind.

“Mr. Styles, you have a meeting in five with—“ one of the assistants speaks up, but Harry stops her.

“I know, tell him I’ll be down in a minute. And please call Isaac to remind him about his deadline tomorrow,” he asks in that voice again you heard yesterday when Sarah called. There’s just something so intimidating yet exciting in the way he bosses around, but not like an asshole. He is a man in power, but he surely knows how to use it for the good.

“I forgot to talk to you about the time Izzy is spending at my mum’s, please remind me to go over it with you tonight, alright?” Harry asks and you nod as the elevator’s door opens and the two of you walk in.

“Bye daddy!” Izzy waves at him.

“Bye baby, be good! Bye Y/N!” he smiles as the door starts to close.

“See you later,” you smile back before he disappears from your sight.

The meeting with Sarah and Mitch got you buzzing, because it’s gonna be such an intimate yet beautiful wedding and those are your favorite. You can’t wait to start snapping the pictures and make their memories last forever of their big day.

You want to say thank you to Harry for suggesting you to them, so while Izzy is with Rosaline, you make a quick round to the grocery store and get everything you need to make some cupcakes, knowing well Harry loves those. He once told you that he could easily eat a dozen of those if he had the chance, so you think it’s gonna be the perfect way to thank him.

You keep the usual schedule, but after your little learning session in the afternoon, instead of heading out to the backyard to play, you suggest you bake the cupcakes together and Izzy is more than happy to help you.

It doesn’t take long for the kitchen to turn into a warzone, ingredients spilled to the counter all over the place, some music is playing in the background and you’ve been struggling to figure out how to use the different machines around the super modern kitchen.

You go all out with the decorations, you even bought some food coloring so you can make the cupcakes different colors and mess around with the icing and cream as well. You get so busy with the task on hand that time flies by faster than you expected. The two of you are still working on the decorating when the front door opens and Harry walks into the mess you’ve created in the past hours.

“What is doing on here?” he chuckles, seeing Izzy’s hair covered in flour, whipped cream on her nose and cheeks as she is throwing some sprinkles on one of the cupcakes, sitting on the kitchen island counter while you are finishing up another one.

“Oh! I wanted it to be a surprise!” you pout. “Izzy and I are making you cupcakes!”

“Why do I deserve a surprise?” he asks smirking, walking farther into the kitchen as he looks around, finding the mess quite amusing, rather than annoying. Harry knows well enough that it’s not easy to keep the place around you clean when there are kids involved in any process.

“I wanted to thank you for suggesting me to Sarah and Mitch. It was really nice of you.”

“Already told you it was nothing. Of course I suggest them a good photographer if I know one.”

You just smile at him shrugging, because no matter how hard he is trying to play it down, it meant a lot to you.

“Look daddy!” Izzy holds up her cupcake, half of it is covered with sprinkles, the other half is decorated with chocolate chips and she is clearly proud of it.

“That looks great, baby!” he smiles proudly, kissing the top of her head. “You have so much stuff on you, you could easily turn into a cupcake too,” he jokes, making her laugh.

“Be a cupcake with me, daddy!” Izzy beams and before Harry could stop her, she wipes some whipped cream to his face, getting him dirty as well. You gasp before letting out a laugh, Izzy shrieks happily seeing her dad all dressed up fancily and licking the cream off his face.

“Isabelle Styles, you have no idea what you just brought on yourself,” he warns in a low tone, already making Izzy scoot backwards as she is trying to escape, but she doesn’t have anywhere to go, the kitchen island’s edge is right behind her butt. However, she doesn’t realize it and tries to push herself back some more, deeming herself to fall right off, but before anything could happen Harry scoops her into his arms, pressing his creamy face to her cheek, making an even bigger mess that’s already there. Izzy is moving around, laughing and screaming as Harry gets some more cream to his hands, wiping it onto her anywhere he can.

“Oh my God, you are wasting all the cream!” you call him out, but it’s such a sweet moment to witness, you would never blame him for wasting it.

Harry stops attacking Izzy and turns to you with a dark look in his eyes.

“Izzy, I think Y/N looks too clean, doesn’t she?” he cocks his head to the side, exchanging a look with the girl in his arms.

“She does!” Izzy agrees as you start backing away from them. Harry sets Izzy down to her feet, grabbing the bowl with the remaining of the cream. He gets a handful for himself and lets Izzy fill her palms as well.

“Oh no, don’t you dare!” you warn them, holding up your pointing finger at them, trying to escape, but you are kind of cornered against the counter.

“It’s my house, I do whatever I want to,” he smirks, so full of himself and in a blink of the eye, they both launch themselves at you and Hell breaks loose.

They start whipping cream on you anywhere they can and when it’s gone, Harry just decides to go for anything else he can reach. Izzy is throwing sprinkles around while thanks to Harry, flour is flying everywhere, completely destroying the kitchen.

“Stop! No! I surrender!” you scream, fighting back, but it’s two against one.

“No mercy!” Harry shouts, so excited, as if he just transformed into a little boy, throwing mud around.

You grab his wrists when he tries to pour sugar on top of your head straight from the contained, holding him back, but he is so much stronger than you, it’s kind of a lost fight already. You don’t even realize how close he is, your chests are almost touching as he has you pinned against the counter, faces only about two inches away from each other. His wrist slides out of your hold, but he drops the sugar to the counter next to you. You try to snatch it to use his own weapon against him, but he is quick to stop you, forcing your hand down next to your side, but in the process he managed to bring you even closer, flushed against his hard chest and your lips part at the sudden mood change that he must be feeling as well, because the playfulness disappears from his eyes pretty fast and it’s replaced by something entirely different, something you can’t even read, because you haven’t seen it in his eyes before. And then…

Then you see his eyes flicker down to your lips, just a moment before yours move down to his. It’s that moment. It’s that exact moment when you just know you both are thinking about kissing, but you don’t know if it’s going to happen or now. You’re not even sure you want it to happen.

You fucking moron, of course you want to kiss him! That tiny voice in the back of your mind screams at you. In a heartbeat, it seems like he is about to move closer, but then the moment is interrupted and completely destroyed when a woman walks into the house, scaring you to death.

“Wow, it seems like Izzy took over control completely,” she comments, walking further into the house as you jump away from Harry, suddenly very aware of the mess you’ve made.

“Gemma, what—“ Harry starts, but he is quickly cut off.

“Don’t ask what I’m doing here, I literally texted you today that I would come by and you said it’s okay.” She gives him a look before her eyes move over to you as you’re trying to somehow clean everything up, but it’ll take a little longer probably. “You must be Y/N, hi! I’m Gemma, Harry’s sister.”

She steps over to you holding out a hand and you reach for it, but then stop, seeing that your palms are all floury. You both let out a chuckle, deciding to just move over the handshake.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you, though it would have been better if we met when I didn’t have whipped cream in my eyes,” you joke.

“Auntie Gemma, we made cupcakes, do you want one?” Izzy runs up to her, holding up a cupcake that was finished, unlike the majority that are going to have poor decorations, since Harry and Izzy decided to use everything in the fight. Now it’s the floor that’s covered with icing, cream and sprinkles.

“Maybe later, sweetie, but they look awesome!”

As you wipe your face with a kitchen towel, you can feel Harry’s gaze on you, your heart beating so fast in your chest, it’s pushing all the blood up into your head that’s already feeling dizzy. What would have happened if Gemma didn’t walk in? Would has he kissed you? Or did you misread the situation and it was nothing just part of the game?

You busy yourself with cleaning up as Harry cleans himself a little with a paper towel before stepping closer to his sister.

“I totally forgot you texted, I replied in the middle of a meeting, I think I didn’t process the message.”

“It’s fine,” Gemma sighs. “I’m already used to my little brother forgetting about me,” she teases him, but he just rolls his eyes at her.

“Let me just help Y/N clean up the kitchen and I’ll be right with you. Would you mind cleaning Izzy off?” Harry asks her, but you stop him short.

“Oh, I’ll take care of this, don’t worry,” you assure him, but as his eyes snap over at you, you lose your voice. He clearly felt the moment as well earlier and now it’s kind of getting awkward, you don’t really want to be left alone with him right now. Not until you figure out what this whole thing was.

“Are you sure? I mean I was the one who started it and—“

“It’s fine,” you try your best to smile at him without overheating. He is standing several feet away from you, but you can still feel what it felt like to be pushed up against him.

Harry hesitates, his eyes following your every move while you are trying to busy yourself and act normal, while you are literally crumbling inside. You almost kissed your boss in the middle of his kitchen, you need a moment to process that.

“Alright, let me know if you need help,” he murmurs before picking Izzy up and heading upstairs to clean them both, Gemma following them right behind. When they are out of your sight, you lean against the counter, breathing out heavily.

Meanwhile upstairs, Harry hands Izzy his phone to play some games while he cleans her and himself off in the bathroom. Gemma sits on the edge of the tub, eyeing her brother curiously, which Harry notices.

“What?” he asks, stripping Izzy out of her dirty clothes.

“What was all that about?”

“What do you mean?”

“I saw you, Harry. You were like, ready to snog Y/N right then and there when I walked in. Did I miss something?”

“No idea what you’re talking about and I would appreciate it if you didn’t bring this up when it’s not just the two of us,” he replies firmly, looking down at the girl who is obliviously tapping on the screen. Gemma just rolls her eyes before leaving the two of them alone.

Wandering down she finds you scrubbing the counters from the mess you’ve made, deep in your thoughts. Seeing her walk in, you shoot her a smile, not sure what to say or if you even should say anything, but when she grabs a towel for herself and starts helping, you speak up.

“Oh, don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of it.”

“Don’t be silly, I’m happy to help,” she smiles, as she starts cleaning the kitchen island up. “So how do you like working for my brother, so far? He mentioned what happened with the daycare. Honestly, those mothers are entitled spoiled brats,” she scoffs making you smile.

“They weren’t too delightful even before the whole fiasco,” you chuckle softly. “But I really like it here. There are a lot more perks and it’s so much easier to focus on one kid than to have fifteen at a time,” you point out making her laugh.

“Yeah, I’m good with my two, don’t think I could handle more.”

“Oh, you have kids?”

“Yes, two sons. Beau is turning ten this year and Jasper turned six in January.” Gemma pulls out her phone from her back pocket and unlocking it she shows you the homescreen that has a picture of two adorable boys sitting on a bench next to each other, munching on a big bowl of strawberries. The younger one, Jasper has a red sunhat on his head while Beau is rocking some cool sunglasses.

“Oh my God, they look so much like you!”

“I get that a lot and honestly, they really should!” Gemma scoffs. “It took twenty fucking hours for Jasper’s big head to come out!”

“Wow that sounds way too much,” you laugh and Gemma nods with a tired, but clearly proud smile.

“Yeah, but it was worth it. Anyway, after my two boys, Izzy is the little princess of the family.”

“The boys get along well with her?” you ask as you both keep cleaning.

“They act like her big brothers, they get so protective over her!”

“That’s cute.”

“Yeah, they really are. My mom has this summer barbeque every year, if Harry doesn’t invite you with him then I’m doing it now, because you need to see how crazy out family gets,” she smirks at you. “All of our cousins and the kids are there, it’s a whole parade.”

“I’m sure it’s a lot of fun,” you smile at her. “One of my friends in high school had a really big family and they always invited me to birthdays at their place, I loved how lively and buzzing it was always.”

“Yeah, it’s nice to get together from time to time,” she nods smiling. “So do you have a boyfriend or something?” she asks then, implying that she is not even sure if you are playing on the team she is assuming.

“Oh, um, no. It’s just me for now. So no boyfriend for me.” Your answer, making sure it gives her the information she was trying to get as well.

“Are you done interrogating her, Gem?” Harry appears from upstairs, Izzy running ahead of him before smashing herself against Gemma’s legs.

“We’re just having a chat, is that a crime now?” she rolls her eyes. “Swear to God, he is such a control freak sometimes,” she then adds turning to you.

“Would you stop offending me in my own house?” Harry gives him a look. Gemma leans down and picks Izzy up into her arms.

“Izzy, you really should tell your dad to pull the stick out of his as—“

“You are not finishing that!” Harry cuts her off and you can’t push your laughter back. Harry’s eyes meet yours over Gemma’s shoulders and he realizes that you are still all dirty and messed up. “Y/N, go and take a shower if you want. We’ll take this over, alright?”

It wasn’t an order, but you feel like it was a very firm suggestion. He is clearly uncomfortable with you talking to Gemma and though you’re not sure why, you don’t want to upset him, so just nodding you drop the kitchen towel and head upstairs to clean yourself up.

“I hope you didn’t say anything to upset her,” Harry comments as he takes over the cleaning. Gemma grimaces.

“What could have I possibly said? I was just trying to get to know her!”

“You are always a little too up in my business, Gems,” he sighs.

“Daddy, can I watch some TV, please?” Izzy asks, tugging on his pants.

“Sure. Do you need me to switch it on?”

“No, I’m a big girl, I can do it,” Izzy nods before running off, leaving the siblings alone.

“Didn’t know Y/N was your business,” Gemma tilts her head to the side. Harry opens his mouth to defend himself, but nothing comes out. He was caught with this one. “Oh my God. I knew I walked in on something, you have a thing for her!” Gemma gasps with wide eyes.

“Stop with this! You and Niall are like some middle schoolers, it’s so fucking annoying!”

“So Niall sees it too, huh?”

“Niall is an idiot,” he points out. “He is… obsessed with this idea that I should start dating again and he thinks I should make a move on Y/N.”

“Well, he is an idiot, but he has a point.”

“No he doesn’t!” Harry argues, but Gemma just rolls her eyes.

“So you want to die alone? Is that your plan?”

Harry has always hated his sister’s bluntness. She never held herself back when it came to giving her opinion, whether it was wanted or not. But what Harry hates even more is that most of the time… Gemma is right.

He doesn’t want to die alone, no one wants that, but being with someone is a hard topic for Harry after losing the person he thought he would spend the rest of his life with. Even just the thought makes him feel like he is doing something bad, like he shouldn’t even be thinking about anyone but his wife, even years after the tragedy.

“Harry, look…” Gemma breathes out leaning against the counter next to her brother. “I know it’s a fucked up situation and I know things are still not in the right place in your head. But eventually you’ll have to move on. We all want to see you happy and I think that… I think Maggie would want that for you as well.”

Harry tries not to physically cringe at the name, the familiar pain is already clutching his heart, like it has been since the day of the accident. Some days are easier, some days are harder, but Gemma is right. Things are still not in the right place in his head and he knows that, he is just not sure how to fix it at this point.

“I’m not saying you should date Y/N, I’m not Niall to force anyone on you. I’m just telling you to try to get out a little more, just to test the waters. But you obviously like her so if it happens to be her, it wouldn’t be a big deal, if you ask me.”

Gemma shrugs and goes back to the cleaning while Harry keeps his swirling thoughts to himself. Two of the most important people have told him the same thing recently and though part of him wants to stubbornly go against it, his rational side knows that they might be right.

But not much can be done when a man is still blaming himself for the death of his own wife. Because that’s exactly the case when it comes to Harry and no one really knows that the thought has been haunting him for years now…

After taking a quick shower, washing your hair and changing into clothes that are not covered in flour, you join Harry and Gemma downstairs and insist on finishing the rest of the cleaning while they move out to the terrace to talk. The evening goes by peacefully, Harry decides to order dinner and Gemma joins the three of you at the dining table.

You love watching the dynamic between them and they truly seem to be very close. Gemma likes to embarrass Harry with stories from their childhood and you are enjoying them all a little too much maybe, but it’s nice to think that he wasn’t always this confident businessman.

“It was so good to meet you, Y/N!” Gemma hugs you goodbye after dinner.

“You too!”

“Bye Izzy, come and give a smooch for your favorite auntie!” Squatting down she lets Izzy wrap her arms around her neck as she kisses her cheek sloppily.

“Bye Gemma,” she singsongs. Harry pulls his sister into a hug as well before walking her out.

You start washing the dishes, Izzy talking to you about whatever show she was watching earlier on TV. When Harry returns he tells you to just leave the rest of the cleaning up for him while he bathes Izzy, but you don’t listen to him and finish up while they are upstairs.

Bringing your laptop down you settle on the couch and just start scrolling through social media, reading articles and whatnot, the TV quietly playing in the background. You send out an email regarding the wedding you are attending this weekend, making sure everything is in place.

When Harry emerges again he joins you on the couch with a tired sigh.

“Thanks for washing the dishes but you really should just leave it to me when I ask you to,” he smiles at you softly.

“It’s not a big deal, I like to be useful,” you chuckle shutting your laptop down.

“As if you’re not useful enough already,” he huffs smiling to himself. “Oh, before I forget, I wanted to talk to you about Izzy going to my mum’s.”

“Oh, yeah, you mentioned it earlier.”

“Yeah. So she is going to spend a week at my mother’s and I timed it to line up with Sarah and Mitch’s wedding. So I’ll leave her at my mum’s Sunday evening and pick her up the next Sunday which lines up perfectly with the wedding on Saturday. That week is obviously free for you as well, like a paid vacation,” he chuckles.

“Sounds good. How far does your mother lives from here?”

“Just a few hours, not that horrible of a drive. If you’re up for it, we can carpool to the wedding and then pick her up together right from there and head home.”

“Yeah, that works for me, thanks,” you nod.

Harry stays and turns his attention on the TV, seemingly pretty unbothered while you still haven’t stopped thinking about what happened in the kitchen earlier. Glancing over at Harry it appears that it’s not that big of a deal for him, so it makes you settle with the thought that it’s not one for you either.

“Good night, Harry,” you smile at him grabbing your laptop and phone as you rise from your seat.

“Nigh, Y/N,” he smiles as you round the couch and head upstairs, but you stop at the bottom of the stairs, lancing back at the mop of locks that’s visible from him from behind. You watch him run his fingers through his hair and you let out a shaky breath, knowing well you did not convince yourself that it was nothing. Not for you, at least.

Because you wanted him to kiss you.

The wedding you’re attending is held on a farm owned by the parents of the bride. The whole barn was transformed into this very country like fairytale location, lots of fairy lights and candles along with some nice, pastel colored flowers with a hint of purple between them.

Everything goes planned. Arriving you meet first with the groom and then with the bride in their separated rooms of the house, going over everything they want just one last time before you get down to work, snapping loads of pictures from them getting ready for the big day.

Emily, the bride is a chatty girl and all her bridesmaids are her sisters, coming from a big family with five daughters, she is the second oldest. The groom, Jesse is a few years older than Emily, but they are such a cute couple and they are clearly so madly in love, it’s always nice to see people be so happy with the right person.

You keep going back and forth between the groom and the bride and later you do the first look thing as well, when Jesse stands outside in the field and Emily walks up behind him, letting him see her for the first time. It really is always such a special moment and you tear up as well, watching Jesse fall speechless upon seeing his beautiful fiancé.

As the ceremony is about to start and the guests slowly take their seats on the two sides of the aisle, you make a quick trip down there to make sure you are using the right lenses, not wanting to change a lot when the ceremony has started. You stop in the corner, just trying out if you can shoot some pictures of the guests as well with the lens you are planning to use, you take a look around using the camera and that’s when you almost faint.

You would pick out that face from any, it has grown to you way too much, but you didn’t think you’d ever see him again. Lowering the camera you stare at the tall figure with parted lips, blinking a few times just to make sure it’s who you think it is.

But it is in fact your ex-fiancé, Keith, and to make it even worse, the woman standing next to him with his arm around her waist is the one he cheated on you with. They are still together and now you are staring right at them.

Tears sting your eyes as you try to look for a way to escape before he spots you, though you know he’ll see you sooner or later, but right now they are standing right at the entrance of the barn and you can’t avoid walking past them.

Keeping your head down you try to stay unnoticed as you march towards the exit, but you apparently, you are out of luck.

“Y/N? Is that you?” Keith calls after you just when you thought you were successful in sneaking out. Stopping in your tracks you seriously think about just running off, pretending like you didn’t even hear him, but it’s kind of too late and it would be ridiculous. So turning around on your heels, you plaster the fakest smile on your lips as you look at him.

“Keith, hi!” you breathe out, taking just a few steps closer to him, still keeping some distance between the two of you. Stella, the lucky woman on his arm blinks at you and at first you’re not even sure she realizes who you are or if she even knows you. The longer she looks at you the more certain you become that she indeed does not know that you’re the woman Keith cheated on with her. Nice.

Keith realizes that the two of you have been staring at each other awkwardly, so clearing his throat he quickly introduces the two of you to each other.

“Um, Y/N, this is Stella. Stella, this is… Y/N.”

You can tell he was thinking about using titles, but he decided to leave it at that, though it would have been a lot more interesting if he just titled the two of you.

Y/N, this is the woman I cheated on you with, who is my girlfriend now. Stella, this is Y/N, to whom I was engaged when I was fucking you!

You flash her a quick, not too honest smile and it seems like she is catching onto that something is not right, but she can’t tell for sure.

“What are you doing here?” Keith asks, a little harsher than you would have liked him to talk to you, but it’s kind of understandable. Seeing each other after what happened is not a pleasant experience for either of you, you assume. You hold up the camera as the answer for the stupid question and Keith furrows his eyebrows at you. “Oh, you still to the photography thingy?”

“Thingy?” you ask, quite offended. Keith always belittled your love for photography. He thought it was just a hobby, something that should stay just a hobby and not get turned into anything more. He once told you during a fight that it takes your time away from more important things, like doing chores. That was one of the most sexist things he has ever said to you and you should have packed your stuff right then and there. But you didn’t, stuck around for three more months before you found out about the cheating.

“Well, this thingy is kind of a side job for me,” you inform him.

“Oh. That sounds… fun,” he nods, but it’s clearer than daylight that he thinks it’s just a waste of time. Good thing he has no business in anything about you anymore.

“Um, I’m gonna go now, but I guess see you two around.” You shoot them another fake smile before turning around and walking away from this conversation straight from Hell.

Marching away from the barn you rush into the nearest bathroom you can find. You need a minute. Or maybe two… five. This did not just happen. You didn’t just face your cheating ex-fiancé with the woman he cheated on you, what kind of sick movie plot is this you found yourself in?

Placing your camera to the counter near the sink you wash your hands and sprinkle some water to your face as well before you lean to the edge of the sink, staring at your reflection in the mirror. You look like you’ve just seen a ghost and quite frankly, you would have been happier with the ghost than with Keith and Stella.

You’ve been doing alright since the breakup, but it’s obvious that only because you didn’t have to see Keith. Following the blowup when you found the explicit texts in his phone, you only had to face him twice and never since then. It’s easier to be okay when you don’t have to look at the person who hurt you most all the time, but coming face to face with him now really threw you off, especially with Stella on his arm. The fucker did not only cheat on you with her, but he went straight into a relationship with her and she probably doesn’t even know that she was just the sidechick in the beginning. If you were really evil, you’d go up to her and enlighten her about who you really are, but you are not one to cause a scene. Keith kept the two of you apart consciously, he never let you go into his office because he wanted Stella to think that he is a single man while he was engaged. Sickening to think how slyly he played the both of you and even after his little plan failed, he kept lying to the poor girl and lured her into a relationship. You wonder if he is already fucking another girl behind her back.

Your fingers start to turn white, gripping the edge of the sink tightly so you loosen up a bit, shaking your arms and shoulders off to pull yourself together. You fix your makeup and run your fingers through your hair quickly to give it some volume before grabbing the camera from the counter and heading out. However shocking it is to be at the same place as Keith again, you have a job to do right now and the bride and groom are expecting some amazing photos and that’s exactly what you’re gonna deliver.

You manage to busy yourself to the point where you are able to forget about Keith’s existence for most of the time. Following the happy couple around you don’t get too much free time, the camera is glued in front of your face basically and it brings you some peace. For a while.

Emily and Jesse disappear for an outfit change and it gives you a short break since they didn’t want that to be photographed, only when they return. So you get yourself a virgin cocktail from the bar and head outside to get some fresh air. You text back Heather and Trevor and then just scroll through Instagram, enjoying some alone time from the buzzing you’ve been around all day.

“Y/N!”

Turning to your right you spot Keith walking towards you, this time alone, but it doesn’t stop you from rolling your eyes.

“What do you want?” you mumble under your breath.

“Just… though we could chat for a little. It’s been a long time.”

“Not enough,” you retort. “And I would like to skip the chatting.”

“Come on, you can’t be still that mad at me,” he chuckles and you almost punch him in the face right then and there.

“Well I am. So go back to your little girlfriend and leave me alone.”

“I know things didn’t end too well, but that doesn’t mean we can’t be civil towards each other.” You can’t help the laughter that bubbles from your throat. He can’t be serious, trying to act like the bigger person now after everything he has done to you. This has got to be a joke.

“This is me being civil, because I’m not throwing anything at you. So leave me the fuck alone, let me do my job and then we hopefully don’t see each other again.”

“Come on. You don’t miss me, baby?” he smirks at you, completely ignoring what you just told him. You physically cringe at the pet name he just called you and you take a step away from him, needing the distance more than ever.

“I don’t. Now leave.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Too fucking bad. Now leave!” you raise your voice, but it does nothing. He is still standing there, looking at you like he didn’t completely destroy you just about a year ago.

“Heard that you haven’t dated anyone since we broke up.”

“Are you asking around after me?” you scowl.

“We have a few mutual friends,” he shrugs. “Is it because you still want me?”

“My dating life is none of your business, Keith. And I don’t want you. Quite frankly, I don’t even know how I could ever want you, so now please let me enjoy my break and leave me alone.”

“Y/N, I just—“ Keith reaches for your hand, but you pull back before he could touch you, holding up a finger at him you start talking slowly and very clearly so the message goes through.

“Don’t ever fucking touch me or talk to me. I want nothing to do with you, you’re a manipulating, cheating, egoistic asshole who ruins the life of others. I’m telling you this for the last time, Keith: leave me the fuck alone.”

He looks a bit stunned at your harsh response, but you couldn’t care less if you’ve hurt him. He did way worse things to you than snapping at you. As you walk past him to head back into the barn, he doesn’t let the chance to punch you in the stomach with his words one last time.

“I wish I could say you were a good fuck, but that wouldn’t be true. Good luck finding some lowlife loser who would even think about marrying you!”

Every fiber in your body is screaming to launch yourself at him and punch him until he is unconscious, because that’s exactly what he deserves. The tears are already stinging your eyes, but you don’t give him the satisfaction to see you react to his words. So swallowing hard you just keep on walking until you are out of his sight, bottling up the sobs and tears for the time when you’re home and on your own.

It’s past two am when you arrive home, drained and exhausted, both emotionally and exhausted. Following the conversation you had wit Keith he didn’t try to talk to you anymore, but you could always feel his eyes on you, wherever you were, as if he wanted to see if you are watching him too, but you weren’t. Looking at him would have been too painful so you tried your best to keep your eyes away from him through the night.

You know damn well that what he told you when you were leaving was just to get a reaction out of you, to get you upset enough to start a fight with him, it’s just who he is, he enjoys having the last word and the higher ground in every situation, but you didn’t want to be his partner in his stupid games this time. However it still hurt, what he said.

Walking into the dead silent house you kick your shoes off, drop your keys into the little bowl next to the door and head to the kitchen to get yourself some water. Pouring yourself a glass you lean against the counter and as you stare ahead of you, nothing can stop the tears from falling.

Everything you kept bottled up during the afternoon and evening just hits you all at once, making you break down heavier than any time in the past months. You sob and cry, letting it all out until your head feels like exploding, but you still can’t stop. You were not ready to face the man that broke your heart like no one before.

In the middle of your breakdown you don’t even realize the footsteps coming from the stairs.

“Y/N?” Harry’s voice calls out, snapping you out of your pity party. He immediately sees that you’ve been crying like a baby, no doubt, but you still try to wipe your cheeks and eyes, pretending like everything is totally fine.

“Harry! What are you doing up so late?” you breathe out hoarsely.

“Just wanted to get some water, but have you been crying? What happened, are you alright?” he starts bombarding you with questions, clearly worried about you, seeing you in this state.

“Everything is fine, I just… had a rough night,” you chuckle through your tears that are still rolling down your cheeks, those bastards!

“A rough night doesn’t make you sob like this. What happened?” Rounding the kitchen island he stops in front of you, not sure how to approach the situation, but it’s kind of sweet how he wants to help, but doesn’t know how.

“I, uhh—I met my… ex-fiancé tonight. He was at the wedding I worked at,” you mumble shutting your eyes closed.

“Did he hurt you? Y/N, if he laid a hand on you, I swear—“ “No, he didn’t hurt me,” you shake your head before adding: “Well, not physically.”

“Come on, let’s sit down for a bit.” He gently takes your hand and pulls you to the couch in the living room, making you sit before he plops down next to you. “Tell me what happened.”

“It’s really stupid, I shouldn’t be this upset about it, but I just… It hurt and I can’t change it,” you whine, wiping some more tears away.

“I’m sure it’s not stupid. Tell me what happened!”

“He was there with the woman he cheated on me with. They are basically a couple now, but she doesn’t even know that Keith was engaged to me when they started dating, so it’s really fucked up. And it wouldn’t have been that big of a deal, because, you know, fuck him, he can do whatever he wants, it’s not my business anymore, but then he came up to me and tried to chitchat with me, which I didn’t really want, of course.”

Harry listens carefully, giving you his undivided attention while you fumble with the hem of your shirt, kind of avoiding to look him in the eyes. Part of you is afraid you’d see judgment in them and you don’t think you would be able to handle that.

“I asked him to leave me alone, but he just kept talking and then I snapped at him a little harsher and when I was walking away he…”

You scowl again, hearing his words play in your head so clearly, as if he was standing behind you, repeating them to you. Harry reaches out and he gently covers your hand with his warm palm, giving it a gentle squeeze, letting you know that he is patiently waiting, not rushing you to talk. Taking a deep breath you blink your tears away before continuing.

“He basically said that I wasn’t even a good fuck and no man will want to marry me.”

“Jesus fuck, what kind of asshole did you date, Y/N?” Harry snaps in horror and it’s kinda funny, makes you laugh through your tears.

“Seems like the worst kind,” you mumble with a bitter chuckle. “I know I shouldn’t have let his words get to my head, but… it’s easier said than done. I feel like such a loser,” you breathe out, your lips trembling as the tears are threatening to flow again.

“Don’t blame yourself for having feelings, it’s completely normal. Of course his words hurt, he once meant a lot to you and he probably knows that too, that’s why he tried to use it against you. What he said held no truth.”

“You think so?” you ask, voice barely more than just a whisper as you finally look at him. His green irises appear so warm as he smiles at you, squeezing your hand again. He scoots a little closer, his knee bumping against the side of your thigh.

“Y/N, I know so,” he chuckles. “That guy was a proper idiot for what he did to you. You didn’t deserve any of that and any many would be lucky to have you as their wife.”

“Really?” you pout, feeling so touched and loved from his words. It’s exactly the reassurance you needed.

“Absolutely,” he nods smiling sweetly.

Everything that happened today messed with your head big time. And now sitting with Harry on the couch, listening to him telling you how worthy you are of love and happiness, it completely throws you off. Ever since that moment in the kitchen before Gemma walked in, you’ve been nonstop thinking about what would have happened and it made you notice even the tiniest things about him.

Harry Styles is a man who is clearly a sight for the eyes, with his chiseled jawline, pink lips and gorgeous green eyes, the duality of his powerful and business appropriate attires he wears during the day and the tattoos hidden under his dress shirts, you’d have to be blind to say that he is not an attractive man. But on top of everything on the outside, he is a wonderful person on the inside and it twists your head more than you’d like it.

Your brain switches off for a moment, or just the rational side, but you completely stop thinking as you stare at each other. The intimacy and emotionality of the moment pushes all your common sense to the side as your gaze wanders down his lips.

The thought of kissing him comes fast and before you could even stop yourself, you move forward and press your lips to his. The touch of his lips against yours is sweet and warm and kind of intoxicating, but in just a blink of the eye your rationality gets a grip of you and your eyes pop open in realization of what you just did. Pulling back you gasp and cover your mouth in shock, feeling your whole inside trembling at the thought of getting yourself fired by this move.

Harry seems frozen and quite shocked as well, his lips are parted as he stays still in his spot.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry, I-I don’t know what’s gotten into me! Harry, I’m sorry, I promise—“

You start rambling in panic, but you don’t get to finish. Harry moves forward, his hand coming to the back of your head as he pulls you in for another kiss, this time making it a lot more passionate and even your tongues get involved. He is kissing you hard and you almost moan into his mouth when you feel his other hand come to your thigh, squeezing it just enough to send a shockwave up your spine. Your hands come up to the back of his hair and you hold onto him for dear life, carrying the kiss on like you’re two teenagers in your parents’ basement, doomed to get caught any moment. Harry goes in again and again, tugging on your bottom lip, licking into your mouth and making your insides twist just from having his lips on yours.

And then you both let go of each other, needing some time to breathe and you slowly realize what just happened. You both stare at each other in disbelief, completely shocked at your own actions, but neither of you have any idea what should happen next.

You let go of each other, sitting back to your normal positions, awkwardly breathing heavily and you realize you cannot deal with this right now. You are way too drained and tired to make it make sense so you decide to just… call it a night.

“I’ll head to bed,” you quietly inform him as you stand up from the couch, walking like a zombie, the shock still clouding your judgment.

“Good night,” Harry mumbles, just as confused as you are.

“Good night,” you nod and basically sprint up the stairs and don’t stop until you shut your door behind you.

Leaning your back against it, you slide down to the floor, hugging your knees to your chest as you stare into the darkness for long minutes. Quite some time passes by before you hear Harry walk upstairs, his door opens and then closes before silence falls on the house again. With a blank mind, you push yourself up, take a quick shower and just go to bed, ignoring everything that has happened today. You’ll deal with it in the morning.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

-

taglist

Let me know if you’d like to be added or removed from the list!

@mariamuses​​ @pastequeharry​​ @f-vasquezp​​ @jgtfvhsg​​ @trulymadlykiki​​ @bookwormandtea​​ @sltwins​​ @kakaym​​ @cherryruins​​ @fairysums​​ @styles217​​ @reidsgubbler​​ @meredithhuntt​​ @hereforreid​​ @kinda-ravenclaw-kinda-slytherin​​ @harrystyle-ish​​ @whitetigerlover17​​ @popluckbih​​ @mellamolayla​​ @shamelessfangirl-3​​ @runway-to-my-aid​​ @battlegground​​ @harrystylescherrie​​ @sunsetcurve-h​​ @wellfuckmylifethen​​ @mroy-l0l​​