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babydollmarauders · 1 year ago

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ILLICIT AFFAIRS — QUINN HUGHES

quinn hughes x fem!reader

summary: in which y/n is Quinn’s little secret.

specific lyrics: “what started in beautiful rooms; ends with meetings in parking lots” and “you wanna scream, don't call me ‘kid’, don't call me ‘baby’, look at this godforsaken mess that you made me” and “look at this idiotic fool that you made me” and “for you, i would ruin myself, a million little times”

warnings: cheating, 18+ content in the middle, ANGST!

notes: you will not think highly of the Quinn in this fic. i know i’m supposed to be writing the Speak Now Fic List— bear with me. this was written as a way to get out of my writers block.

i can always stop.

i can.

i have freewill to refuse his advances.

i think.

but the stolen stares, the weight of his body against mine, the feeling that comes with knowing he wants me in the way i’ve longed for him to want me, it’s an addiction.

a drug that i just can’t quit, despite how dirty and used i feel afterwards. despite having to sneak away with my hood up and my head down.

the high of being his, just for a moment, outweighs the inevitable self-criticism in the aftermath.

because that’s the thing about illicit affairs; they make you hate yourself a million little times.

i’ve barely just climbed off of him, my back skimming the mattress, before he’s already standing from my bed.

my eyes follow his movements, the fluidity and grace of flowing through steps he’s done a million times before.

his dress shirt buttoned back on, his suit pants following, his tie lazily swung around his neck and his suit jacket pulled over to complete the look.

while i’m tangled in my thin sheet, still recovering, he’s fixing his hair in the mirror above my dresser and letting his own eyes graze his neck for marks. finding none, as i know better than to make myself known on his skin.

never seen, never heard, always secret. no marks, never wear perfume nor lipstick, never leave any trace of existence. a ghost above all else.

his eyes lock with mine in the mirror, catching my longing stare with his indifferent one.

“i’ve gotta go. you watching the game?” he knows the answer, he always knows.

“yeah, Quinny, i’ll be watching.” my cheeks flush. “i always do.”

“good. i’ll try and score a goal for you.” he winks in the reflection, my heartbeat picking up as it does every time. “bye, baby.”

there’s no goodbye kisses, no whispered sweet nothings, just quirked lips and the sound of my bedroom door shutting behind him.

it’s not long until the bliss wears off, leaving me with nothing but self-depreciating thoughts. no one to blame but myself.

he has a girlfriend.

one who isn’t you.

aren’t you ashamed?

aren’t you disgusted with yourself?

don’t you deserve better?

although, maybe not.

my phone buzzes on the nightstand beside me, an incoming call from my best friend, and despite feeling like an idiotic fool and a betrayal of my own morality, i accept the call.

“hey, Lukey!” false cheer drips from my tongue, but just like every other time, i know he won’t know the difference. “to what do i owe the pleasure of your call?”

“hey, y/n/n!” Luke’s chuckle crackles over the speaker of my phone. “i just wanted to talk, i’ve been missing you extra the past few days. i want my movie buddy.”

“i miss you too, Lukey.”

god, if only he knew how badly i’ve fucked up without him to lead me the right way.

“don’t you have Jack now to watch movies with?” i question, shaking off the urge to confess my sins. to ask for his forgiveness and plead for him to talk some sense into my love-riddled mind.

“it’s not the same. he doesn’t pay attention to the little details as well as we do.” i can hear his pout through the phone, making me giggle.

“just one more month, then we’ll have the whole summer to watch as many movies as we want.” i remind him.

“yeah, one more month.” he replies, solemnly. “anyways, UBC is still treating you good, right? no chance you’d wanna transfer to, i don’t know, Rutgers or Princeton?”

i chuckle at his lame attempt at convincing me to leave my dream school.

“i’m sorry, moose; but UBC is still where my heart lies.” oh, if only he knew just what, or rather who, the reason was for that.

“yeah, alright. it was worth a shot.” he sighs. “and Quinny’s taking good care of you, right?”

i my throat closes up and i choke on the air in my lungs.

“what?” i ask him, sitting up in my bed and pulling the sheet closer to my body.

“Quinn.” he repeats. “he promised he’d look after you. has he?”

“oh, yeah. yeah, he’s been checking in on me. making sure i’m okay.” i guess that’s one way to put what we’ve been doing.

“good. i’d have to kill him if he let you get hurt.”

my feet have barely touched the ground outside of my car before the lake house door is flung open. my best friend bounds out of the house, his middle brother hot on his trail, attempting to speak to him about something long forgotten by Luke.

“YOU’RE HERE!” Luke’s arms are flung around my waist, hoisting me up in the air and spinning me around.

the melody of my laugh mingles in the air as my arms wrap around his neck.

“Lukey, put me down, i already feel sorta car sick! it was a very long drive.” despite the fact that my words are true, i can’t wipe the smile off my face from being reunited with my best friend.

my feet finally fall flat on the ground as Luke backs up to look at my face, his fingers grazing all over it, more specifically the under eye bags from stress and sleepless nights.

“i thought you said you were doing great? what are these?! they’re new!”

his concern is heartwarming but before i can respond, i notice all the people behind him on the lake house porch. Jack, their friends, and most importantly, Quinn. the real reason for my newly spotted dark circles.

i muster up a chuckle, rolling my eyes.

“they’re designer. they come with the UBC tuition.” i stress, hoping he buys the ‘i’ve just been working myself to the bone with schoolwork’ excuse.

“checks out. you’ve always been my little nerd.” he grins, slinging an arm around my shoulder and turning towards the porch. “aren’t you guys gonna come say hi?”

“didn’t wanna impose on your moment.” Jack jokes, hopping down the porch steps to pull me from Luke’s grasp and into a hug.

“hey, bubby. welcome back.” he smiles, ruffling my hair mid hug. i step on his foot in retaliation, making him push me back so he could check on his white sneakers.

“it’s good to be back, bubba.” i grin as he rolls his eyes.

“hey kid, long time no see.” my head snaps over to look at Quinn, who smirks at me with a knowing look.

we saw each other three days ago, the day before he flew out to Michigan.

“hey, Quinny.” a bashful smile takes over my lips and my heart beats overtime, the natural reaction when i’m in his vicinity.

“no.” Luke speaks, pulling me into his chest protectively. “you don’t get to ‘hi’ her. you got her all year. this is my turn.”

his words make me blush and i pat his chest.

“don’t worry Lukey, this is our time.” i reassure him. “i but i would like to go inside now.”

“yeah, right.” he nods, letting me push away from him. the guys all head back into the house, leaving me to open my trunk and grab my bag.

a strong hand encases mine on the handle of my suitcase, soft lips i know all too well grazing the shell of my ear.

“i hope Luke doesn’t mind sharing.” Quinn leaves me frozen behind him, taking my bag and my breath with him.

beats of time pass before i follow suit, closing my trunk and locking my car before jogging up the porch steps and into the house.

this will be one hell of a summer. literally.

“i’m going for a run.”

my words are spoken through Luke’s shut bedroom door, followed by the opening of said door.

“a run?” he asks me, sleep still prominent in his face from his mid-afternoon nap. “since when do you run?”

“i started running when i was in Vancouver. i thought i told you that?” the lie is like a sour candy on my tongue, spit out quickly as though another second of these words in my mouth would make me sick.

“oh, okay. how long will you be gone? i’ll have the movie set up for when you get back.”

“i shouldn’t be too long. like an hour at most.” i tell him, tightening my ponytail.

“you’ll actually probably be all sweaty when you get back. just wake me back up when you get back and i’ll get the movie ready while you shower.”

sweaty and flushed, for sure.

“okay.”

“Quinn, please.” my heavy pants turn to pleads, begging Quinn to get me over the edge. his hands hold mine behind my back as i grind my hips against his.

unable to risk being caught at the lake house, our rendezvous settings have downgraded from my bedroom back in vancouver. to the parking lot of a field, only a 15 minute walk from the house.

“you want me to make you come?” his words cause a shiver down my spine, my head nodding at rapid speed. “use your words, baby. say it.”

“i want you to make me come.” i beg. that’s all it takes for him to flip us over, my body laid across his back seat as he thrusts into me, hooking one of my legs over his shoulder.

“fuck, you’re so wet baby. feel so good squeezing my cock.” i clench around him, his dirty whispers echoing in my head as the coil in my stomach tightens. he angles his hips, thrusting up into the spot that makes my eyes roll back.

“right there.” i gasp, my hands coming up to grip his shoulders. i’m careful not to dig my nails into his skin. careful to never leave any sort of marks. his right hand trails down my body, settling on my stomach.

“right there?” he teases, repeating his previous move, all while pushing one hand down on my stomach. my legs shake, and i clench around him one final time before the pressure relieves and i achieve my orgasm.

Quinn thrusts a few more times, riding me through my high and chasing his before his hips stutter and he pulls out, painting my stomach with his release.

the glass windows are fogged, the car hot and reeking of sex, the only sound being our heavy breathing as we gather ourselves again.

my eyes flutter, my energy spent.

“hey, baby.” Quinn’s hand snakes onto my thigh, shaking it slightly. “you should go. Luke is probably waiting for you.”

i nod. i know he’s right, but it still stings, being dismissed so quickly.

i wipe my stomach with a napkin from his glovebox before slipping my biker shorts back on and pulling my tank top back over my head.

“i’ll see you at the house.” he bids me goodbye, as i slip out of his car, starting my walk back to the house.

aren’t you sick of this?

don’t you feel guilty for lying to your best friend?

for betraying him like this?

don’t you think you can do better?

that you deserve better than clandestine meetings?

than being someone’s ‘other woman’?

than being tossed aside the second he’s done with you?

i’m done.

“alright, you ready?” Luke asks, plopping down on the couch cushion beside me, a bowl of popcorn clutched in his hand.

“yeah, press play, moose.” Luke is just about to hit play on the netflix movie when the front door swings open. Quinn steps into the house, shutting the door before noticing us on the couch.

“hey.” he gives us a nod, walking towards the stairs. “oh, Olivia is flying in tomorrow morning.”

my heart stops, my muscles tensing.

Olivia.

Quinn’s girlfriend.

the one we’ve been sneaking around for four months.

“oh cool, what time?” Luke is oblivious to my silent panic.

“six a.m, so i’m heading to sleep. night, Luke. night, kid.”

there it is again. that stupid nickname. ‘kid’.

Quinn heads up the stairs and i hear the faint sound of his bedroom door shutting.

my head snaps over to Luke.

“hey, i gotta go get something from my room, i’ll be right back.” i pat his leg before rising from my seat, making my way towards the stairs.

“oh, okay.” he nods, getting on his phone as i walk up the stairs.

i come to a stop outside of Quinn’s door, debating knocking before i decide not to, in order to not raise suspicion from Luke.

i swing the door open, slipping in before quickly shutting it behind me.

Quinn sits on the foot of his bed, head rising from looking at his phone. his brows furrow before he raises one in questioning.

“didn’t get enough of me earlier?” he teases. “aren’t you and Luke watching a movie? i don’t think we can have a quickie right now-”

“we’re done.” his lips snap shut, whether in shock, or disbelief, or just plain speechlessness, i’m not sure. but he’s silent, so i continue. “no more meetings. no more.”

my heart aches in my chest, my throat getting tighter and tears bubble up in my eyes.

i thought it would be easy to stop.

i used to tell myself i could do it whenever i wanted. but now, i know it’s not true.

there was no ‘last time’, only this afternoon. no soft goodbyes. i’ll be stuck seeing him for the rest of my life. he’s a mistake that i became all too comfortable with. with him, i let my morals wash away like a drawing in sand. but i was done hating myself, thinking so low of myself for my forbidden actions.

he chuckles as if i told him a joke, as if i didn’t just tell him we were over. standing from the bed and prowling towards me, his hand raises to cup my cheek.

“what are you talking about, baby?”

it’s always ‘baby’ in secret. ‘kid’ while in company. he makes me feel so stupid, like i’m a child; naive and small.

“don’t call me ‘baby’.” i swat his hand away from my cheek. “and don’t call me ‘kid’, either. do you not know my name?

“do you not know the name of the girl you’ve been fucking in secret for the past four months? that you’ve known since you were ten?”

his nostrils flare, stepping back as though i’ve slapped him.

“i know your name, y/n.” his words drip with venom, his lips press together into a straight line. “they’re just nicknames.”

“they’re cruel.” i spit. “you know what you’re doing. i’ve made myself available to you for too long. i’ve let you use me and throw me to the side as if i’m nothing. i’ve become something i never would’ve imagined i would be-”

“y/n-”

“no! this is my turn to talk. look at this godforsaken mess that you made me. i’m actively lying to my best friend, your brother. i’ve become the ‘other woman’. a title i would’ve smacked myself for, just six months ago. i’ve lost my sense of morality. i’ve become someone that i don’t even recognize; because of you. so, i’m done.

“i will not be your secret anymore. i deserve more. i deserve better than someone who keeps me hidden. who dismisses me mere minutes after using my body.”

tear tracks stain my cheeks, my face feels tighter under the salty liquid and i quickly wipe them away.

“you’re right.” my lips part slightly, my gaze fixating on the man in front of me.

he seems genuine. his eyes glistening with pity and an unrecognizable emotion.

“i’m sorry. you deserve better.” he tells me, nodding his head solemnly.

“i do.” i reply. “and i’ve been rejecting everyone that is interested because i’ve been hoping and praying to any higher power that you would love me the way that i’ve loved you since i was sixteen, but that’s not gonna happen, is it?”

he shakes his head ‘no’ and i can’t even hold it against him, because at least he’s finally being honest with me.

i bite my lower lip, nodding dejectedly and gripping the doorknob behind me.

“for you, i’ve ruined myself a million times.”

i slip out the door, padding back down the stairs and leaving the man i love, and our illicit affairs behind me.

Luke’s head rises when i return, his eyebrow raised and his lips parted, surely ready to question what took me so long. but with one glance at my tear stained face and bloodshot eyes, his mouth closes, his arms opening instead.

i drop onto the couch, burying my face into his neck. his arms wrap around me tightly, one hand holding the back of my head as the other rubs my back.

“i know.” he whispers. “it’s okay. i know.”

his words are mumbled against the shell of my ear and the emotion with which their spoken confirms that he knew what i’d been doing. they only succeed in making me feel even more guilty. all this time, i thought i’d been doing a pretty good job of hiding our meetings this summer, but my best friend is smart, catching on a lot more than i realized.

“i’m so sorry, Lukey.” i sob, my apology muffled by his skin.

“it’s okay. and i promise, it’ll be okay, y/n/n. i’ve got you.”

#quinn hughes #quinn hughes x reader #quinn hughes imagine #quinn hughes fic #quinn hughes blurb #vancouver canucks #nhl blurb #nhl fic #nhl imagine #faithlynn’s writings <3

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orikiys · 1 year ago

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✿ ✿ falling out of love with skz ( first pov version )

✰ pairings: ot8!skz x fem!reader

✰ genre: angst, romance, heartbreak

✰ warnings: heartbreak, guilt, falling out of love, sad, unedited ( i wrote this before i go to sleep ), based on real life events.

✰ word count: 1.8k + words

౨₊ৎ chan

falling out of love, but why is it? is it because i don’t read your texts no longer? or is it because that the mere sight of you no longer has been jumping on my feet? like that heart that used to skip a beat, tell me baby, did we not love each other? you were the muse to each of my poetries, you were the lover but i’m still disheartened by the fact that i couldn’t be. i made it out. i removed you from my life, to those little gifts you gave from your clothes that i had— all of them. and maybe, just maybe a part of me did get removed as well. snatched away and lost in the process. but i don’t need your help in getting it back. because i know that if i do, history would repeat itself. i would fall for you over and over. but… you wouldn’t. it’s been a hard month to try not to look at your socials, to see if you’re just as miserable as me or not. it’s been hard to try not to unblock you and keep re-reading our texts all day long. it’s been hard to not think of you. because my love i hate the fact that i still want you after all that happened, but you don’t. but i can’t love you like this, not anymore. i keep picking myself apart and framing together the left fragments of us. but there’s no us anymore, is there? i don’t want to pretend any longer. i missed you. i loved you. but i keep forgetting the fact that maybe i no longer do. or maybe i’m just getting better at pretending? all i do know is, i don’t think i know how to love you anymore.

౨₊ৎ minho

i may have forgotten the reason, but i loved you once. i truly did with all of my heart. falling in love was hard. it felt restricted, constrained and suffocating. but falling out of love? that was even harder. with each sun rise, i feel myself drifting apart from you. it’s like i don’t even know you anymore! i wish i could go back to the time where i asked you about your favourite colours or maybe your favourite movies or your favourite songs, but i can’t. we are no longer lovers. nor are we friends. we are strangers with memories. strangers who once crossed paths. we walk past each other and it’s like i don’t even know you, like i’ve never met you. i’ve seen our pictures on my phone and i question what went wrong? but maybe we were just habits and we thought we’d always have it? guess not. it’s the way i know you’re no longer around, but everything reminds me of you. is it the scent of your lingering perfume on the pillow covers? or maybe it’s your half-empty coffee mix? if promises were meant to be broken, i accomplished them. i am sorry for all the late nights that i whispered to you telling you that i’ll always love you. i’m sorry for all the times i couldn’t be there when you wanted me to. i’m sorry for all the times that i failed to understand you when you were just trying to protect me. i’m sorry for learning how to unlove you. i’m sorry min. i truly am.

౨₊ৎ changbin

remember when you said that we have forever? then why does it feel like our time’s already over? it started not so long ago, then why? was it written in fate already? or did we make it happen? i remember the time we held hands and shared umbrellas. i remember the time where we’d talk for hours. i remember the time when you first kissed me, then why am i still waiting for a proper goodbye? i wish you would break me at once, so i wouldn’t have to feel guilty for loving you a little lesser everyday. i wish you weren’t so perfect that i didn’t have to find excuses to avoid you. i wish you would snap my heart in half, crumble to pieces and throw away the broken fragments, so i don’t have to feel like i’m in the wrong. for once, just let me escape the reality. for once, please don’t love me. for once, please forget me. for once, let me go. for once and for all, forgive me for not trying to love you harder. i don’t know where it all went wrong. i wish i could turn back the time and erase myself from your memories, so you won’t even think of me or the pain that i caused you. i may be the villain of your story, but i too was once the protagonist.

౨₊ৎ hyunjin

i wonder if you ever noticed when i stopped telling you my secrets. i wonder if you ever noticed that i stopped bringing home your favourite packet of chips. i wonder if you noticed that i began tensing up whenever you hugged me. i wonder if you ever even noticed the way my soul began detangling from you. and when you tucked my hair behind my ear, it didn’t leave a trail of fire like it did before. my body— it stopped reacting to you the way it did before. and i wonder, why you never said anything. because you noticed it. you noticed every single thing yet you stayed quiet right by my side. it’s the way i began hating you for making me feel guilty. but it always did feel better to blame others, didn’t it? would you mind if i sat next to you but didn’t smile? would you mind if i ask you what you liked once again? because i didn’t want it to end. you were the most beautiful dream that i ever experienced, yet now i can’t even recognise the beat of your heart. i realized that i fell out of love when i could no longer guess what you wanted. or maybe that time when i couldn’t bring myself to even kiss you. baby, where did it go? help me. help me get it back. falling out of love with you is a nightmare and i wish i could wake up.

౨₊ৎ han

i had all that i wanted, and then none. from the perfect life, to a fallen apart one. nothing stays for too long. and i wish i let go of everything a bit sooner. so it would hurt me less whenever i see you. it would hurt me less whenever i hear someone mention you. your letters, they still rest in my drawers. your rings, they still fit on me. except they feel too cold. i no longer wear them for an entire day without feeling the urge to throw it. but i don’t want that to happen, so instead i keep it locked away in a box. but the key, it’s with you. so i can’t bring myself to open it. many people told me that i have changed. but i truly wonder, have i? or is it just the fact they can’t fathom that i no longer love you like i did before? it may be my fault for it all, i’m the one to blame. but i tried my best to stop myself, to stop these unwanted feelings and in the end i broke your heart. i still remember that look on your face when you held me tight for one last time. goodbyes weren’t the best, but i wish it was. so i didn’t have to live everyday thinking that i killed your spark from the inside.

౨₊ৎ felix

i wish i could go back to the time where i didn’t have to think thrice before waking you when you couldn’t sleep. i hoped that i could’ve told it all to you sooner, but how could i have predicted that unfortunate ending? loving you was beautiful, delicate and everlasting. until it wasn’t. falling out of love was harsh but slow. the flowers have begun withering, i noticed. do you not water them? or is it because they remind you of me? i know what you’re trying to do. i’ve tried it as well. but it didn’t work. i tried erasing you and everything related to you. but at the end of the day it’s the way my phone’s lock screen still has your face. your number, it’s untouched. and perhaps if someone were to ask me about my favourite movie, without hesitation i would reply with the texts we sent, the little date vlogs we made. call it guilt or call it lost love. the time spent with you gave me happiness, and i called that love.

౨₊ৎ seungmin

i knew you were hurting. so maybe i should’ve applied bandages to your aching heart. i knew you were hurting when i began replacing our memories. was there something that i could’ve done to make your heart heal faster? but i knew it couldn’t replace the pain i’ve caused you. i used to tell the moon about you, now the stars await to hear my stories. i used to have that stupid grin on my face whenever you called me, now we stopped meeting. and it kills me to know how you’ve been living all this long after knowing that the one who you loved broke your heart. it hurts me too when you agree to everything and anything i say. is that how much you love me? that you’re even willing to be vulnerable in front of me? if given another chance i would fall in love with you over and again till i can’t escape it. i want to trapped, engulfed in your love just like you are in mine.

౨₊ৎ jeongin

my heart breaks at all the possibilities we could have been. it breaks even more every time i remember you wanting to start a family with me in future. i ended it all at once, didn’t i? i wonder how i could be lifeless that now a single tear falls while you cry for me. i wonder how i could be so lifeless that i forgot you’re my other half. i want to experience that spark of sleeping and waking to your texts once more. i want to experience being called ‘my princess’ for the rest of life. but it’s the way that we don’t even talk. we blocked each other from our lives, it was for the good. then why am i having sleepless nights filled with remorse? is this the part of moving on? or is it the part of moving back? because my ship seems to be sailing in the wrong direction. so my love, don’t pray for me anymore. the moon won’t listen.

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cinnamonbear22 · 4 months ago

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oblivious love (c.s x reader)

chapter two

go read the first part ;)

fem!reader, fluff ?

i was slightly startled awake from the faint snoring next to me which, i wasn't used to sharing a bed. my eyes peaked over next to me to see chris on the other side of the bed, sleeping on his stomach with his arms sprawled as well as his legs.

my eyes admired his hand that was near me, the sunlight exposing the veins that were still prominent even when asleep. the beams had also showed his jagged, bitten nails and the tiny scar that goes across his thumb from an accident that happened when we were children. it wasn't even noticeable, but i'll always notice it.

my hand carefully made my way up to his, my fingernails traced along each finger of his gently to see if he would wake up, but he didn't. what was i even doing right now..?

i knew i was going to get hurt later in the day, when i would see the girl he told me about last night at the party. i can imagine it in my head, the scenario playing out like a movie scene. he was in my bed now, sleeping on the other side next to me, yet it was going to be looked at as nothing. he thought of this as nothing, just something friends would do. we've known each other for so long it would always just be nothing to him.

regret filled my body as i started to pull my fingers away from his limp hand, but suddenly, his hand squeezed my fingers so they weren't able to move. my breath got stuck in my throat, i thought he was dead asleep... "what are you doing?" his voice was extremely groggy and his tone seemed dazed.

"i-i didn't think you were up" my heart pounded at the sudden movement he had just shown, which still had me in shock.

"i woke up a little bit ago" he didn't pick his head up from speaking into the fluffy pillow.

"you sounded like you were asleep" i murmured and he relaxed the grip he had on my hand, but i quickly pulled it away.

"why are you doing that?" he whined, reaching around the bed for my hand but he couldn't find it. "come on" he seemed slightly agitated.

"chris i don't think the girl you like would appreciate you cuddled up in bed next to me holding my hand" i stared at the floor as he laid still for a moment.

"i think she'd very much like it" he snapped back causing me to furrow my brows. this girl had to of had some weird kinks...

"you're so weird" i groaned and swatted his searching hand.

"do you want to go get breakfast?" he asked, peaking his dull blue eyes over my shoulder scanning my face for a reaction.

"sure" i looked back up at him, which he was now grinning ear to ear.

he jumped over me off the bed, his bed head was extremely messy and slightly tangled, and he stared down at me from standing up. "come on" he cocked his head to the side to indicate me getting up.

"the bed is so cozy though" i pulled the blankets back up to my chin and softly rested my eyes. "five more minutes" quickly i had felt cool air hit my exposed skin, the warmth of the blanket being ripped right off of me. "come on..!" i groaned and tried to curl myself in a ball to preserve heat, but in a few swift movements from chris, i was being picked up and carried out of bed. "stop!" i hit his arm repeatedly but it looked like i had no effect on him.

"alright you're up now" he set be down on the floor of my room. "don't pout" he mocked my face and i nudged his chest. "get ready" he began to walk out of my room, my eyes lingered on him as he shut the door.

i went over to the temporary dresser i had put all my clothes in and pulled out a pair of loose fitting jeans, and a white tank. i wasn't going to get fully ready, i wasn't up to it. plus i would be getting ready for hours tonight before the party.

i put my hair in a little updo, considering i have major bedhead as well. i sprayed a light layer of perfume, grabbed my phone and headed out towards the main area.

chris was already ready and standing in the kitchen, and he was writing a note on the counter with a sharpie.

'sorry matt took the car, brb, (y/n) + chris' and he ended the small note with a smiley face. i looked around him to see the time on the stove, which it was still a little early for the other two to be up. chris tossed me matt's keys over the counter, "ready?" he asked, his hair was mostly hidden underneath a backwards cap while he was in baggy jeans and a graphic t-shirt.

"mhm" i hummed and looped the keys around my finger before following him outside to the garage. he held the door open for me and i walked out in front, and he lightly jogged around to the drivers side of the car and opened up the door for me. "thank you" my eyes looked up at him before sliding into the seat, and he shut the door gently. he opened the garage and slid into the passenger seat, pressing another button on the garage door opener that was sitting in the car that seemed to have open the gate. "where are we even going?" i asked him as i started to reverse the car out of the driveway and into the street. he pressed the buttons again to close up the garage and gate.

"uh," he hummed in a thinking manner, rubbing his mouth with his brows knitted together. "i'll tell you where to go" i felt his eyes looking at me but i was focused on the road to look back over.

he turned on his music as we drove through the somewhat busy streets with slight bickering here and there because he would give me directions last minute. but after fifteen minutes we arrived at a little diner, where the parking lot only had a few cars and looked a little dead.

he jumped out of the van as soon as i parked, not even giving me a chance to turn off the car. he ran around the front, and i couldn't help but to laugh a little. he swung the door open for me, offering his arm like a gentleman. "m'lady" he talked in a goofy accent, making me laugh a little more.

"you don't have to open every single door for me" i stopped the car and took off my seatbelt, grabbing the arm he offered me and got out of the car.

the warm breeze hit my skin as we walked across the parking lot while both my hands gently held his arm as we walked into the restaurant. of course once again, he held the door open for me and let me walk in first.

he quickly snatched my hand up again the second we walked into the restaurant, looking from side to side. "you could've got stolen" his fingers lightly drummed against the back of my hand, and i couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or not.

"you were right behind me" i looked up at him as he was looking around the rest of the diner. "i don't think anyone would snatch me"

"right" he scoffed and a hostess came to greet us. chris of course was extremely polite while speaking to her, and she showed us a booth.

we sat on opposite sides of each other, the waitress pouring us two cups of coffee from the pot she was holding and said she would be back soon to take our order. "i dare you to drink this without putting anything in it" i tapped my fingers along the mug, his eyes looked down and back up at mine.

"that's disgusting" he curled his lips, wrapping both his large hands around the mug as if he were warming them.

"you're disgusting" i nudged him with my foot under the table, and he rested his face in his hands with an admiring look in his eyes. "stop staring at me"

"how could i not" he said in a goofy tone, still holding his head up with his hands. "did you sleep good?"

"yes, very good" i began to pour some sugar and cream in the hot coffee, stirring it gently. "did you?" i looked up from my cup and he was still staring at me.

"of course" he finally stopped gazing and picked up a menu. "what are you feelin'?" despite having my own menu, he still held up his for the both of us to look at.

"uh," my eyes scanned over all the choices, everything seemed appealing. "i don't know" i bit my lip and looked over at him. "what are you getting?"

"probably some pancakes, bacon, sausage, the whole sha-bang" he was nodding his head as he listed off the choices.

"the whole sha-bang?" i giggled a little at his word choice. "what if we share this?" i pointed at the stack of five pancakes with the two choices of sides.

"you don't want your own?" he looked back at me with a confused look.

"you know i'm not going to be able to finish a meal by myself, i always end up taking it home" i looked at the menu again as his eyes lingered on me for a second.

"well you have to eat, i'm making sure you eat a lot if we share" he sounded like he was assuring himself more than me.

"don't worry i'll eat" i sat back in my seat since we had decided.

"what sides do you want?" he bit his bottom lip while studying me.

"you pick"

"no, come on i feel bad if you don't" he sighed in a stressful manner and i couldn't help but giggle.

"i'll seriously eat anything you choose" i gently hugged my torso while he looked like he was under pressure. "i literally cannot choose it's all up to you"

"okay fine" he grumbled and set down the menu, shaking his head slightly.

"why are you in such distress?" i laughed and he lurched forward towards me over the table.

"because i feel bad and want to make sure you get what you want!" his eyes widened as his body was almost halfway over the table, and he bounced right back in his seat. his reaction made me laugh more, his legs started to bounce a little.

"you're already hyper and it's still early" i softly kicked his leg to try and get him to stop bouncing in his seat.

"what can i say," he paused before grinning. "you make me full of life" he said sillily earning another kick from under the table. "stop playing footsies" his foot stepped on mine to try to get me to stop.

"ouch," i fake winced, pulling my feet back and exaggerated my frown.

"did that actually hurt?" he sat up and leaned his elbows on the table now, a look of concern in his eyes.

"it hurt so bad" i sarcastically placed my hand over my heart and tilted my head to the side, acting as if i were truly in pain.

"drama queen" he played with his hands on the table and the waitress came back, ready to take our order. chris ended up ordering for us anyway, doing all the talking and whatnot. seeing him switch from being a little hyper to super polite and sweet will always make me happy. fifties music filled the air of the diner as well as the smell of breakfast foods and coffee. light chatter among the other tables was to be heard while me and chris sat in a comfortable silence waiting for our food.

but of course that didn't last long, and we ended up talking for ten minutes straight until our food got brought out. chris immediately grabbed the silverware while thanking the waitress, unwrapping the napkin that held the forks and knifes for me. "thank you" i smiled gently and grabbed them, looking back up at him. he started to cut the large stack of pancakes on his side into little pieces, almost as if a baby were going to eat them. he then flipped the plate around so the cut pieces were on my side, sliding me a bottle of syrup. "i can cut my own food" i opened the syrup and started to drizzle it on my side of the plate.

"i like doing it for you" he cut his side up in much larger sections, and started to scoff down the pancakes.

"christoper!" i lightly scolded, covering my smile with my hand since i had food in my mouth.

"what?!" his cheeks were filled like a chipmunk as he chewed obnoxiously just to annoy me. the rest of breakfast he ended up eating most of the pancakes and sides, plus everything i couldn't finish. i didn't really feel guilty for not finishing my portions since he did easily. "did you eat enough?" we both looked at the cleared plates in front of us.

"yes, yes, thank you for finishing mine" i laughed a bit while looking back up at him, which he had syrup dripping down his chin. i grabbed a napkin at the end of the table and reached over, dabbling his chin while he resisted slightly. "i might have to pull out the mom trick for this one" i pulled my hand back and licked the tip of my thumb, his eyes watched as if he were in a trance.

with my other hand i reached back over the table and held his chin with my thumb and pointer finger, and using the thumb with saliva i began to wipe off the sticky syrup that was stuck on his chin. "don't do this to me" he quickly licked his lips and watched me attentively.

"what? i'm not even doing anything" i got the last bits off his face before removing both my hands and wiping them off with a napkin.

"you are so naive" he folded his hands on the table and we strongly locked eyes for a few moments before the waitress came back.

"could i offer any dessert?" she asked while taking the empty plates. i looked over at chris since i wasn't much prepared for this question.

"yes please" he answered immediately but his eyes shot over to me, almost as if he were asking for reassurance. i nodded and smiled at his gentle blue eyes before he turned his attention back to our waitress. "could we just do a vanilla shake please? two straws" he held up two fingers as he spoke. she jotted down the ticket, and left to go put the order in.

"a shake at..." i pulled out my phone to check to time. "nine thirty-eight in the morning?" i laughed a little and he just shrugged. when checking my phone i had also noticed a few text from nick and a missed call from matt. "your brothers are trying to contact me"

"what are they saying?" chris asked, folding his hands back on the table.

"i don't know," i opened my messages to see nick spamming me asking where i was, and why i didn't come to his room last night. "is it okay if i call them back real quick? is it rude if i call in here or should i go outside?" my finger hovered over matt's number.

"just call them here" he pursed his lips and without hesitation i called back matt. the phone rang only once before he picked up.

'hey' matt didn't sound fully awake as he answered the phone.

"hi matt" i laughed a little at his sleepy voice, chris started leaning across the entire table to eavesdrop on the conversation.

'did you take my car out this morning? i haven't been downstairs to check yet but nick told me there was a note or something'

"yeah, i'm sorry i didn't ask you. chris wanted to get breakfast" i pushed back chris's forehead since he was so close to my ear, trying to pick up on every word.

'no no it's okay, don't be sorry' he yawned loudly with a slight groan. 'you're still coming with us to the event tonight right?'

"yes of course" i started to twirl the ends of my hair with my finger nervously, feeling chris’s eyes burn through me.

'when will you be home?'

i don't know why, but i smiled at the fact that he said home, as if it were my home too. "within the hour i think" chris now began to pout since i pushed him away, he crossed his arms like a child and slouched in his seat.

'okay cool, do you think you could help me with an outfit? i have no idea what to wear'

"awe matty b still asking me for fashion advice” i bit my lip from laughing because he wasn't so fond of the nickname we all gave him as children. “of course”

'thanks' he chuckled over the phone, making me laugh as well. chris's brows were furrowed together as he stared daggers through me, but i stared right back. 'what are you going to wear?'

"yesterday me and nick got a little black silk dress" my fingers still twirled around my hair, chris pursing his lips gently as he watched.

'i'll wear black too so we can match'

"both of your brothers said the same thing" i smiled as chris almost jumped out of his seat.

"said what?" he tried to get my attention but i ignored him.

'seriously?' matt's voice was dull over the phone.

"seriously." i repeated him. "you three figure that out i'm staying out of it" my eyes darted at chris and he still had a pouty frown.

'chris will most likely kill us just so he could match with you' matt chuckled and so did i. i looked back up at chris who was still giving me those childish eyes.

"you think he would?" i mostly said that to tease chris, and to really grab his attention i placed my foot on top of his and nudged his shin lightly.

"think i would what?" chris's eyebrows shot up as he gritted his teeth.

'i know he would, i don't think i'm even going to attempt to argue with him'

"that's cute" i covered my smile with hand, looking at chris with every intent of keeping him on edge.

"what is cute?" he tapped his foot underneath mine making both our legs bounce slightly. "alright," chris swiftly reached over the table and took my phone right out of my hand. my jaw dropped at how quick this all happened. "sorry, we have to go be back soon, goodbye matt" chris spoke quickly on the phone before hanging it up, tediously staring at me.

"you are absolutely insane" i stared at him with shock as he still kept my phone.

"you're insane" he shot back at me, kicking my foot off the top of his. "how am i supposed to act when you're talking about me in front of me?"

"how do you know i was talking about you?" i tilted my head as i rested it in my hands now.

"you said something and then touched me like i was supposed to listen" he argued, but i wanted to push it further.

"what if i just wanted to touch you?" my lips slightly tugged upwards in a cocky manner, seeing that i could get him riled up without even doing much gave me a surge of confidence.

"you are really an inexplicable person" he scoffed, rubbing his mouth with a little smirk plastered on his face. as i opened my mouth to say something, the waitress set down the vanilla shake in front of us with two straws. "thank you" chris looked up at the waitress as she walked away. "do you want the cherry?" he asked as he picked it off the top of the whipped cream.

"you can have it" i smiled before pinching the straw closest to me and bringing it up to my lips.

"watch this" he spoke with the cherry in his mouth, and i silently waited for him to show me whatever it is he wanted me to watch. after about twenty seconds he stuck out his tongue with the cherry stem tied in a knot. "impressive huh?" his words were mumbled since he spoke with his tongue out.

"you show me this every time you have a cherry like it's something new" i took another sip of the shake, and his face saddened a little. "but, as always, it is extremely impressive" i praised him so he still felt the validation.

he took the cherry stem out of his mouth and set it on a napkin, and he took a sip of the shake. "this is absolutely amazing" he threw his head back after tasting the shake, causing me to giggle at his reaction.

i bent my head back down to take another sip, and he did at the same time as well. both our faces were so close together, his eyes were softly gazing at me through his dark lashes. i tried my best not to smile, but it was inevitable. "stop it" i leaned back into my seat, crossing my arms in an embarrassed manner.

"i can't help myself" he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. he pointed it up at me and i heard the camera shutter sound effect.

"chris stop" i immediately felt embarrassed with the camera being pointed at me, trying to cover up my face that was now probably red.

"oh come on you look so pretty" he cooed as he focused on his phone, rapidly snapping pictures. i couldn't tell if he was messing with me at this point. he then reached out across the table holding his phone with the front facing camera, getting both of us in the shot with the shake. he started to record as he set up his phone against the napkin dispenser. "alright watch this, you only see this in movies" he talked to himself on the phone and he looked at me, holding onto the cup and leaning into his straw. i looked at the camera and giggled as he was taking a little sip. i of course took a sip too at the same time so he wouldn't be mad, i looked at the camera still as he looked towards me. i ended up moving my eyes up to meet his, and we both started to laugh again. "i've always wanted to do that" he stopped recording and smiled down at his phone with the shot he got.

"you're so corny" i leaned back into my seat trying my best to hide the blush that began to spread across my face.

"could i post this?" he showed me a screenshot he took of the video where im looking towards the camera, smiling with the straw close to my lips and he was sipping, gazing admirably at me.

"i don't care" i examined the photo more, even more butterflies seeing the way he looked at me when i wasn't looking at him. "but don't you think that might stir stuff up? i'll probably receive fifty threats within a minute" i bit my lip as he just shook his head.

"don't even worry about that" he was on instagram now, posting it on his story and tagging me. over the years, i grew a small following because of the boys. i would be in a few videos or tik toks they made considering that i was with them most of the time back when they only lived in boston, and i guess their fans are fifty-fifty about me. i never read the comments, or looked at my direct messages because i knew if i did i would just hurt myself.

i tried to stay off of social media, but i did like posting here and there, and of course i still kept it to keep up with the triplets while they’re back and forth.

at the end of our meal, this ended up snatching the check before i could even get a chance to take out my wallet. he repeatedly told me that he was okay with paying, yet i still felt guilty since he did let me splurge yesterday. when leaving the restaurant, he held open all doors for me as well as the drivers side, and we were finally back on our way home.

part 3 for the party orrr..?

#fem reader #christopher sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #fanfic #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo x reader #x yn #chris

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strniohoeee · 1 year ago

Note

idk what to ask but something super angst enemies to lovers with matt

Disregard(Matt’s Version)

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Matt and Y/N hate each other. However one night at a party things take an ugly turn, and Matt’s there to help her. Feelings are expressed but are these feelings mutual? 🌷

Warning⚠️: None really some guy tries to take advantage of reader.

Song for the imagine: R U Mine?- Arctic Monkeys

And satisfaction feels like a distant memory

And I can’t help myself

All I ever wanna say is “are you mine?”

“You at a party with Matt? How’s that going to work” my friend asked me over the phone laughing

“It’s going to work because I hate him, and I will be far away from him duhh” I said raking through my closet looking for an outfit

“I just don’t know how you can hang out with him and his brothers when yall can’t stand one another” she said

“Well Nicks my friend mostly sadly and Chris is cool, but Matt’s just always there” I said huffing when I couldn’t find the shirt I wanted

“Why don’t you and Nick just hang out” she responded

“I mean we have, but they are always together. I’ve learned to just not acknowledge him” I said laughing

“Man I don’t know how you’ve been sticking it out this long” she said to me

“He was at his worse in high school, so if I got over that I can get over anything” I responded back

“Mmm that’s true he was an annoying little shit” she said giggling

“He really was, and he was such a dick” I said rolling my eyes

“He was, but I’m gonna let you go girl. I know you have to prepare for this party, and I’m about to head out with my man on a date” she said to me

“Alright girl I love you, and have fun I’ll talk to you soon” I responded

“Love you too, and have fun as well” she responded

I hung up and finished looking through my closet for another outfit.

“FINALLYYYY” I said as I found the shirt I’ve been hunting for

To be honest I’m not too sure why my hate for Matt was still there. I’ve been friends with Nick for 5 years now, and although Matt was an asshole in school I couldn’t stop my hate towards him.

He just was always there, and swore he was hot shit. He wanted to be cool and mysterious so badly and it annoyed the shit out of me.

I agreed when Chris called him “tough” because it was true. He acted like this big bad guy, and like he was too good for everybody. Hated it and I hated him

Initially I really liked him, but he destroyed all of that when we were in high school. It haunted me daily…..man fuck Matt

I finished getting ready and decided to Uber over to the triplets house since Nick wanted us to carpool

I headed into their house and walked up to nicks room

“Nickkkk” I said as I walked in and hugged him

“Heyyy” he said pulling away

“Excited for tonight?” I asked him as I sat on his bed

“Very! I haven’t been to a party in a while” he said looking in his closet

“Oh my gosh sameeee” I said

“Should I wear a pink shirt or a black shirt?” He asked

“Mmmmm pink, that color looks good on you” I said back

“I was thinking the same” he said laughing

Suddenly Chris and Matt barged into his room

“YOOO” Chris yelled coming in

“Hey” I said smiling at him

“Stop fucking screaming like a bafoon” Nick said

“Uhhh who brought the negative Nancy” Chris said rolling his eyes

Nick just rolled his eyes at Chris as he finished getting ready in his bathroom

“Nick I have a question” I said getting up

“What’s up?” He asked

“Do you have my perfume I left here a while back” I asked

“Mmm I should, might be in my top drawer” he said

“Yeah you might want to mask that smell” Matt said laughing

“Ew….youre not funny” I said giving him a dirty look

“Yeah and youre ugly” he said making an ugly face

“You act like a two year old” I said not even looking at him

“Alright children enough” Chris said rolling his eyes

“I’m going to wait downstairs, I’m not going to allow Matt to ruin my night” I said after I sprayed myself with perfume and leaving Nicks room

About 10 minutes later they all came down and we decided to head out. Matt drove us to this influencers house who they knew and we headed in

“Alright guys don’t get too wild and try not to fight anyone” Nick said

“Got it” we said laughing

We walked in and started to say hi to the people we knew. I headed into the kitchen to make myself a drink because this was going to be a long night.

I was sitting in the kitchen sipping on my drink while people watching when I saw someone from the corner of my eye.

“Hey” he said, I looked over at him smiling as I swallowed my drink

“Hi” I said properly

“I’m Grey, but most people call me G” he said sticking his hand out for me to shake

“I’m Y/N” I said shaking his hand

“Are you here alone?” He asked as he began to make himself a drink

“Oh no I’m here with some friends, but we branched off” I said to him

“Oh nice yeah I did the same. I think my friends with some girl or some shit” he said shaking his head

“Ahh yes the classic party hook up” I said

“So cliche right” he said laughing

I went to answer but Matt walked into the kitchen clearing his throat and shoving in between us to get a Pepsi

“Oh uh am I interrupting something?” Matt asked looking between Grey and I

“No, go away Matt” I said sighing

“Cant I get a drink?” He said cheering my cup and giving me a shit eating grin

“I’m going to uhhh I’m going to head out” Grey said before walking off

“You fucking dick” I said punching Matt

“I came to get a drink” he said shrugging his shoulders

“You’re such a fucking asshole I hate you” I said finishing my drink and going to make another one

“Not sure why you hate me” he said scoffing

“Tuh- you’re not sure?” I said grabbing a coke to mix with Malibu

“Mmm no not really” he said shaking his head

“Oh well let me jog your memory shall I? You were an absolute piece of shit in high school. You called me every terrible name under the sun. You turned our whole grade against me. Let’s not forget that so-called prank you pulled on me. Calling me telling me you liked me when you knew I liked you asking me out and then telling me it was a joke and that you truly hated me. Oh not to mention you recorded it and sent it to the whole fucking school. You humiliated me in front of everyone” I said mixing my drink

“It wasn’t that serious, you know. I was hanging around asshole guys and I thought it was cool” he said nonchalantly

“You’re still the same way though” I said scoffing

“I’m really not” he said

“You are Matt….you are. I don’t know what I ever did to you, but I know I don’t deserve this shit” I responded

“Oh don’t act innocent you weren’t a saint” he said

“Yeah maybe in high school I got you back a few times but nothing compared to the shit you out, and that was high school were 21 now” I responded

“I have my reasons and you have yours” he said

I looked at him and scoffed…what is he even saying

“Grow up Matt” I said lifting off the counter to walk away

“Right back at you” he said shaking his head

“And stay the fuck out of my way” I said shoving past him

I walked off angrily and decided to look for Grey because I really needed to take my mind off of Matt. He was making my blood boil and my head spin

I saw Grey sitting on a couch scrolling through his phone

“Hey stranger” I said walking up to him

“Oh Heyy Y/N” he said smiling and locking his phone to put it away

“Sorry about that back there he can be a bit annoying” I said sitting next to him

“Ex boyfriend drama?” He asked

“Oh god no. Rival since high school” I said laughing

“Damn since high school” he said

“Yeah” I responded taking a seat next to him

Grey and I had been talking on the couch for a while. His fingers and hands often becoming loose and touching me. Nothing that made me uncomfortable, but it was certainly strange.

Unbeknown to Y/N Matt was watching her and Grey the whole time. He had a weird feeling about him, but couldn’t put his finger on it. He didn’t like that Grey was touching her, but she didn’t seem bothered so he stood back.

“Hey want to head up to a room I can’t really hear you” Grey asked nicely

“Ummm yeah sure” I said

“Nothing weird I promise” he said laughing

“Oh no worries” I said laughing and getting up to follow him

Matt was sitting as he watched them get up and head to the stairs. His ears perking up at this…..something was telling him to follow them.

Slowly Matt got up following behind them at a good distance. Listening in on their convo as best as he could. Didn’t seem strange, but he still wanted to make sure Y/N was okay.

Grey and Y/N had walked into a room shutting the door behind them, and Matt stood a few feet behind. He didn’t want to listen in, but he also wanted to make sure nothing weird was about to go down

“So tell me more about you” Grey said as we both sat on the bed

“Mmm well I’ve been living here for a while now, I’m originally from Boston” I said scanning my brain for more things to say

“Nice nice” he said staring at me

“I’m not sure what else to say” I said giggling

But Grey didn’t say anything he just stared at me….it started to bother me

“Is there something on my face?” I asked getting nervous

“Oh uh no sorry you’re just gorgeous” he said

“Oh thank you” I said looking down

At first coming up here seemed like a good idea, but now I’m worried he got the wrong picture. I did not want anything to do with this man other than a possible friendship. This was started to bug me out

Suddenly he started to lean in, I jumped up

“Oh no no that’s not why I came up here” I said backing away

“Oh? Well then why did you come up here” he asked shocked

“Umm because I thought you wanted to hear me better not try to kiss me” I said looking at him weirdly

“Well one kiss wouldn’t hurt” he said getting up

“No I’m good” I said nodding my head at him

“Just one come on” he said in a sleazy way

“And I said no. No is a full sentence” I said getting upset

“Stop being a tease already” he said

“I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong idea, but I do not want to kiss you” I said

He came closer and I backed away banging into a table against the wall

“Back away” I said

On the other side Matt heard the muffled conversations and the scuffling going on between two people, but he didn’t know what was going on.

“Please stop” I said pushing him off of me as we struggled against the table causing some things to fall

“Come on baby” he said getting upset

“FUCK OFF” I yelled pushing him off and grabbing the front door

My eyes surprised me when I made eye contact with Matt who was standing infront of the door

“Matt?” I asked confused

“What’s going on?” He said looking behind me into the room

“Nothing” I said pushing him back trying to get him to leave

“Your little bitch is a tease” Grey said to Matt

“She’s not a bitch, and if she said no then it’s no” Matt said looking the dude up and down

“She doesn’t want you either, so don’t try to be Superman” he said scoffing

“Fuck you. I’m being a decent human being respect her” Matt said

“What are you going to do about huh?” He said laughing at Matt

“Come on stop” I said trying to pull Matt away

“No” he said pushing my hand away

“You’re a piece of shit” Matt said walking towards Grey

“Don’t care” he said still laughing

Matt looked at him before punching him in the jaw

“MATT WHAT THE FUCK” I yelled out

They both started to scuffle around throwing punches

“Stop it” I said trying to pull Matt away

Matt hit the guy again in the nose causing him to stumble backwards

“When a woman tells you no that means no” he said backing away from Grey

“Matt we have to go now” I said pulling him away

Matt and I ran down the stairs and to his car

“Are you okay?” He asked me as we got in the car

“Yeah I’m fine” I said bluntly

“What a sick fuck” he said turning his car on

“Why do you care?” I asked

“Well I got a bad vibe from him okay, and I just didn’t want you to get hurt” he said as he pulled off

“Matt caring about me” I asked

“I don’t care about you…..I just didn’t want some creep to take advantage” he said scoffing

“Mm don’t care about me sureeeee” I said sitting back in my chair

“I don’t fucking like you okay Y/N” he said getting upset

“Feelings mutual I could’ve handled my own” I said

“Didn’t seem like it” he said

“I had it” I said getting upset with him

“You’re so stubborn” he said

“And so are you” I said

“Just stop okay” he said gripping the steering wheel tighter

“Stop what? Just take me home and shut up” I said rolling my eyes

“You’re such a bitch I try and help you and this is what I get” he said

“Stop the car” I said bluntly

“No” he said

“Matthew stop the fucking car now” I said

Matt looked over at me and pulled over. I hopped out and began to walk

“What the fuck are you doing?” He asked

“Shut the fuck up” I said continuing to walk

Matt hopped out the car following behind me

“Get in the car now” he said sternly

“You’re not my dad, go away” I said shooing him

“I’m not asking you again. Get in the car now” he said trailing closer to me

“GO AWAY” I yelled at him

Matt ran a little faster and grabbed my arm pulling me to turn around

“IM NOT LEAVING YOU HERE STOP BEING STUBBORN AND GET IN THE CAR” he yelled at me

“Let go of me” I said pulling my arm away from him harshly

“Get in the car. I know you hate me. I get that, but get in the car. I’ll take you home and I’ll never bother you again” he said

“Matt no I’m not going anywhere with you” I said

“Stop being so stubborn holy shit” he said pulling at his hair

“No one told you to save me, no one told you to take me home and no one told you to follow me out here. You don’t like me so go away” I said turning around to keep walking

“Yeah I don’t like you because…..because I love you” he said

I stopped in my tracks and slowly turned around to face him

“What?” I asked

“I love you okay” he said shaking his head

“No no you’re not doing this. After all these years of being a piece of shit you’re not about to pull this I love you card” I said pointing at him

“I’ve been a horrible person I know, but I truly didn’t know how to express myself. And i know these words probably mean nothing. But I want you to know I can’t do this anymore. I can’t hide my true feelings by pretending to be mean to you. When I saw you and that guy I got so jealous because that….that should be me” he said

“I don’t know what to say to you” I said shaking my head

“That’s okay. Just get back in the car, let me take you home. And you don’t have to see me ever again” he responded

“Matt I… I don’t know what to say because I love you too. I have loved you since high school, and I masked these feelings with hatred because it was the easiest thing to do” I said

“I’m sorry, okay. I never meant to hurt you the way I did” he said

“I don’t know if I can accept that apology right now. You hurt me badly” I told him

“I get that, but just let me take you home and we can talk about it tomorrow” he said

“Ok” I responded in a whisper

I got back into Matt’s car and he drove me home. The whole ride was silent. My thoughts racing in my head about what he told me….did he really love me?

Matt got to my apartment complex and walked me to my apartment door

“Thanks Matt” I said looking at him

“Oh yeah no worries can’t have you walking alone at night” he said

“No. I mean for everything tonight thank you” I said smiling

“Oh yeah. Of course” he said smiling back

“Ummm I really like you, and you did hurt me, but I want to work this out” I said

“Yeah yeah I do too” he said looking at my eyes

“Well goodnight Matt” I responded opening my door

“Can I have a hug?” He asked shyly

I smiled at this and pulled him in for a hug, kissing him on the cheek

“I appreciate you truly for tonight” I said smiling weakly

He nodded his head at me

“I’ll call” he said

“I’ll answer” I responded

And with that I walked into my apartment locking the door behind me.

Matt drove back to pick up his brothers. Once he was home he laid in bed smiling to himself.

I can’t wait to hear her voice again.

The End

I hope you enjoyed this one I love yall sooo much omgg🥹🖤🖤

-J💅🏽

#sturniolo triplets #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets imagines #matt sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo imagines

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peaky-shelby · 2 years ago

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Bulldog | Mbappe x Reader

Requested by @mrs-bellingham : "I’m not saying it was a good idea, I'm saying I snapped"

Writer's note: originally requested for Virgil Van Dijk, thank you for letting my change it into kylian again and sorry. For future requests if anyone is wondering for now I'm writing for Kylian, neymar, hakimi, Bellingham and Mason. You can always request with other players but it just isn't certain I'll do it. Love you all xx

Maybe it’s not that bad, I thought to myself. Pacing back and forth on the changing rooms, if it were any other time I would hate being there. The strong perfumes always made my stomach twist and turn I hated it but right now something else was making my stomach twist and turn which I hated even more. I rubbed my face with my hands, like it was a lamp and I could wish for time to get back and I could stop him from doing what he did but time seemed to be remaining painfully slow and moving forward. I was panicking, exaggerating, making a bid deal out of nothing-

“We have a problem-“ Kylian walked in behind you, opening and closing the door quickly, pretty much ruining all my hopes that it was all in my head. I turned around to face him, holding my hands in fists. I had been dealing with the drama that came with being friends with Kylian pretty well, I had accepted it, along with the constant following of the paparazzi. When you started dating you both tried to kept it a secret for as long as he could and it seemed to be working out until-

“You punched the fucking guy in the face-“

“I know!” he said, raising his hands, like he was being called by a referee for a foul.

“Oh you know?” I asked, mocking him “that sucks because I would prefer for you to tell me you were hypnotized or something.”

“How would that be better?”

You reached down at one of the benches, snatching the closest thing you could find which was a psg shirt and threw at him “how Is just punching a guy out of the blue a better idea?”

“Hey!” he held the shirt in his hands “I never said it was a good idea. I’m saying I snapped!”

“couldn’t you have snapped at a wall or something?”

“They guy was taking pictures of us! Why are you mad at me?” he yelled back. I took a deep breath in and sat on the nearest bench, holding my head in my hands, fearing that it might even explode. I heard him sighing and cursing until he sat next to me. I couldn’t even look at him, I was feeling all sorts of emotions, fearing for tomorrow’s headlines and articles, the impact it would have on his public figure. “I’m sorry” he mumbled; I knew how hard it must have been for him to do. I titled my head to look at him, he was staring at the floor. “I thought I could get the camera and the pictures would never be leaked- I was trying to save it as much as I could-“

“Famous last words.” I joked and looked away again.

“I know what these pictures of us making out seeing the light is gonna do to you, I wanted to stop him.”

“You broke his jaw.”

“That’s-“ he searched for the right words “I didn’t break his jaw. He is overreacting. I’ve had tougher hits on the field”

“I’m pretty sure he was bleeding-“

“The floors are red you wouldn’t know if he was bleeding-“

You looked a him shocked about to laugh “That’s what you’re going with?”

“Listen he’ll be fine, ok? Will this be a story? Maybe-“

“Definitely” you corrected.

“Probably. Will I need to pay for his doctor appointments in the near future?”

“Absolutely.”

“Do I regret it?”

“I hope so!”

“No.” he answered bluntly. I was taken aback by how serious he looked, like he was making a confession that if it came down to it, he would do it again. “Hey look at me.” He placed his hand on my cheek, his touch was doing things to me without even trying. He pushed my hair behind my ear, smiling because he knew that always made me weak. “That guy said things about you, he took inappropriate pictures of you without your permission, I’d knock him out again if I had to.” I couldn’t help but feel love him in that moment, the way his eyes fell on me sent shivers down my spine. Like I was his and only his and no one else was allowed to even look at me without his permission. I leaned in and kissed him, a sloppy kiss, that would give him the reward he deserved for protecting me.

“My loyal bulldog, biting anyone that gets close enough.” You whispered in his lips.

“Damn right!” he replied, pushing me back on the bench so he’d be laying on top of me, kissing my cheek and then my neck, leaving a small bite on my skin, that made me laugh. “Sometimes biting you too” he said, making me laugh even more. He slipped his hands under my shirt, his hands on my skin finding their place on my waist. Getting caught on the hallways obviously taught us nothing because we were about to finish what we started and we would have if the door didn’t crack open, making us both jump on our feet.

“OH!” said Neymar disgusted closing his eyes “You guys wanna get a room or something- for fuck’s shake.” He opened his eyes slowly, making sure no one was naked “Coach wants to see you. Now.”

“Merde…” He looked at me, a sympathetic expression on his eyes and gave me one last kiss “I love you.”

“Love you too Kyky.”

“Yeah, have fun in there-“ he patted Kylian In the back, while I stood back watching him leave. I looked up at Ney, worried.

“Is he gonna be ok?”

“He’s gonna get a good yelling but he will survive don’t worry.” He looked at me smiling “are you gonna be, ok?”

“Sure.”

I went home without him and waited for him to return. Turns out he had been benched for next game, coach wasn’t happy for his reaction at all but Kylian seemed pretty chilled, despite the consequences. We cuddled on the couch, my head on his chest, his hand messing with my hair while I slowly fell asleep in his arms. “Thank you” I whispered, getting his attention. He looked down at me confused and I raised my head as much as I could to look at him “I didn’t say thank you or sorry.”

“For what?” he asked, almost laughing at my sudden gratitude or apology.

“For what you did for me.”

He smiled, his hand slipping on my cheek, his entire palm covering it “No need to thank me. You said it yourself I’m your bulldog. I was born to protect you.”

My face fell back on his chest, while I blushed and I hugged him as tight as I could, making sure he wasn’t just a dream.

#kylian mbappe #mbappe imagines #mbappé #mbappe x reader #mbappe #neymar one shot #neymar imagines #neymar x reader #neymar jr

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hamsternella · 7 months ago

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Unrequited ━ V (V for Vendetta) x Reader

tw: v being obsessed, unrequited love, obsession, murder, non-con kissing, non-con touching, angst, this is something I wrote in -like- a really short time, plus english is not my first language- sorry

Terrifying. If I had to use one word to describe V, it would be 'terrifying'. He was tall, always dressed in black; with the mask of an icy smile, drawn like a deep cut on the white surface. He was the image of an idea, not even of a human, and yet I had come to like him even a little. It wasn't impossible to love him; it was just complicated. We would coincide in mundane situations as one who shares a special moment with a friend, we would look into each other's eyes -or where I thought he would have them- and we would extend the same hand to seal a pact. An implicit agreement that implied union, loyalty and affection. I considered V as part of my family; even if for him that term was alien to his principles, and therefore incompatible with his nature.

Betrayal, unfortunately, never comes from the enemy.

The Gallery of Shadows was awash with a soft melody. I had to maneuver the jukebox to reduce the words to a murmur, until I hit the echo of footsteps that were alien to the song. A new melody; a particular rhythm. When I turned around, V was standing in front of me.

''What brings you here, dear friend?'' he asked with strange tension in his voice, ''I thought you'd be busy tonight?''

I hid my hands in my pants pockets. I hid the trembling to my fingertips, the fear.

''No, not tonight,'' I replied. ''I find greater joy in sharing a moment with you, as usual.''

''But we have not shared such moments, I'm afraid. You have found so-called joy elsewhere, have you?''

''I live my life, V. Although I understand that for you such a thing is impossible, considering the events.'' I let out a sigh. The taste of a coffee candy I had eaten hours ago was still occupying my throat. ''May I know what you've been doing two days ago?''

''I don't like your tone; I don't understand what you mean by this.'' V stretched out both arms for a moment, admiring the gallery like someone presenting a play on stage. ''I have swum among books, enjoyed good movies, and even indulged in lonely nights, in the moonlight and the murmur of hidden maces… as is usual for me.''

He shrugged one of his hands into a fist, delicately superimposed on his chest. A barely noticeable bow shook a couple of hairs above his mask. I gritted my teeth.

''Why? What is the reason for this question? What's more, do you seem a bit upset?''

''Not at all,'' I replied dryly. I held back the fury, intermingled with fear; confusion eating at my insides. ''It's just that yesterday… let's say, a somewhat interesting story came to me. Well; a rumor, more like.''

''A rumor. What kind of rumor?''

''I don't want to play theater anymore,'' I whispered. ''Tell me, V. Please tell me you didn't do it.''

''I can't deny something I don't know, my dear. What kind of rumor?'' he repeated approaching me.

Not a scent, not even the remnant of a perfumed essence like that which comes from the flesh. It was like a shadow, he moved, felt and expressed like a concept. He was an idea, not a person; he didn't have the qualities of a human related to his nature. I had to remind myself of this every day to prevent something like this from happening-but it did. It was happening. And as he came closer to me; as one of his hands ran gloved fingers along the contours of my face, following the path of the tears, wiping them away, I found myself once again surrendered to fear. To doubt, and terror, and sadness.

V was a reminder of the faces of a sleeping society that I refused to face all the time. He was molded for it; I had to get used to it, give up pieces of myself, renew myself; belong to a section of that darkness that so characterized him.

I humanized the beast, and another paid the consequences of his hunger.

I couldn't pull away from his hand, and I could only keep my head fixed in one direction: the hollow of his eyes.

''I don't have to acknowledge your crimes,'' I continued in a whisper. ''I may know of them, but it is not in my judgment to determine their validity. I am not God; I do not come from a divine court. But V, this… this thing you have done is not right.''

''You're feeling terrified, dear,'' his voice darkened, losing itself in a hoarse sound. Danger. The truth was scary. ''What are you afraid of, if it's you and me in this room? It's been us against a system, and I don't think that's what you're afraid of right now.''

"Don't ignore me… Don't fucking ignore me, V.''

My body reacted on its own, but his hands rushed to my arms, clinging to them, bringing my body to an even greater state of alertness than before. His fingers caressed my skin over the fabric of my shirt, bristling my flesh. We were almost glued together, body against body; our breaths gently altered, increasing in rhythm little by little.

''Yes,'' he whispered, ''it was me. I killed him.''

''Oh, God!'' I burst into tears. Had I been on my own I would have fallen to the ground, but V kept me standing. ''Why… why, V. I can't… I don't want to believe it, I- God…''

His arms went around my body, forcing me to arch my back. My hands fell on his chest, where I hid my face flooded with tears. His hands tangled in my hair, tracing a back-and-forth motion down my back; they sought to shelter my pain in a false sense of protection.

''But I was good,'' he continued, his voice descending to an almost desperate pitch. ''He felt no pain, though I wanted, God, how I wanted him to realize it; to look me in the eye, to feel the same despair I felt…''

''You are a sadist!'' I pounded his chest with my hands made into fists. I pushed him, I screamed at him, I drowned in hot tears. ''What kind of desperation? You've killed an innocent man in cold blood! You've killed him, you've left a family without their father! V, for God's sake!''

There was a struggle. V tried to keep me glued to him; he struggled to hang onto my neck, my waist, my arms; he gasped in desperation, brutally shaking what was left of me in his arms before I managed to wiggle out of his grip.

''I was merciful. I could have been a monster, but I was good, and I let him sleep.''

''You killed him,'' I spat angrily, ''but you come and dare to stage a pitiful theater where you consider yourself the victim. What did he do to you?''

''Oh, no,'' he laughed; ''not to me. It was to you.'' He took his time to catch his breath. He had to brush away the locks that had fallen over his mask. ''It's embarrassing, I have to admit, but true that I've come to notice how much you've been isolating yourself from our cause. You've disappointed me a little; but I still like you.''

''Do you still like me?'' I repeated with a choked laugh. ''Still? Fuck you, asshole. What do you mean by that, me, away from the cause?''

''It's not that I question your loyalty, don't think that, please. But this little whim had to come to fruition. You could have risked everything.''

''Whim?'' I took a step back, took a breath of air, and when I least expected it I let out a laugh. A hysterical outburst. I had to cover my face for a moment to calm down.

A silence settled between us. It was V who broke it, slightly hesitant.

''Did you love him? Did you love that man?''

''Of course I loved him!'' I let out a cry, shedding a torrent of tears, silent this time. ''V, I haven't committed any crime. I… I just wanted to try, and live, and feel whole and... I don't know, all of this all of a sudden… I don't understand,'' I looked straight at him at the mask. He had his fists clenched on either side of his body. ''I don't understand what I did to deserve your mistreatment; this way of punishing an innocent, even.''

''I couldn't stand it. Every man has a limit.''

''You are no man, V; you are a monster,'' I said. ''You have robbed a father of his family, a noble man of his own life. You have robbed him…''

''He stole you from me!'' he interrupted me. His voice bounced like an echo in the distance, barely audible. ''I saw you first; I gave you a reason- a reason to live. We were supposed to be companions, something beyond such a banality as… that.''

''A banality, like what? Huh?'' I walked up to him, hitting his chest with my fist. ''What a banality you say! Is it love, is that it? Is it your envy? What is it, V? What's the bullshit reason for you to ruin people's lives, thinking you're an out-of-touch hero.''

His hand flew to my face, cupping it by the cheeks. He had taken me by surprise and the force was so great, the pain stabbing into my flesh, that I was left only to hang on to his arm.

''You're not mine,'' he whispered, the voice raspy, ''but I like to imagine that you are. And it's hard when you're fluttered with petty reasons. Yes, what I did wasn't right; but having you by my side feels like something that's right, and that's enough.''

''You're making me hate you, V,'' I said haltingly.

''I'm glad to know that I can still awaken in you the feelings that really matter.'' He fell silent. He seemed to be thinking deeply about something, still holding my cheeks. ''I love you.''

I closed my eyes, completely surrendered. My arms fell limp and my heart stopped. What I suspected with a terror crackling in the corner of my mind was suddenly a painfully palpable reality. In front of me, V; with his feelings and the mask of a smile suspended in the icy material. V and the words embedded in my ears like his fingers to the flesh of my face.

''I love you,'' he said again. ''I love you, my dear.''

''Stop,'' I begged. My voice sounded like a sigh. "Shut your mouth. Don't say it anymore.''

The pain eased as his fingers released my cheeks, both of his hands cupping my face gently; his body clinging to me, his hips pushing against mine. My back hit a wall when we had no room to spare, but he didn't stop. The coldness of his mask brushed my lips, and all I had left to do was close my eyes. The impact was soft; and the kiss, almost nonexistent. The simulation of a creature trying to imitate something human; unbecoming, then, of himself.

My first kiss in years lasted as long as a sigh. I didn't remember the flesh being so hard and lacking that particular flavor. I felt miserable just looking back and finding nothing but empty, hollow eyes. The same smile. I hated it.

''You don't love me,'' I whispered.

''I really think I do.''

''This is not love. You're taking over something you think is yours, V.'' I held back a shudder as one of his hands brushed my neck. ''I don't love you.''

Silence. Suddenly a murmur, very faint, and it was our feet. My body fell over his; the cold of his mask against the side of my face, his arms around me. A half-hearted embrace. I felt his heart, but I couldn't find my own.

I closed my eyes when I felt the tremor. It was him.

''I know,'' he replied.

#fanfic #reader insert #reader #obssesion #angst #v for vendetta #v #masc reader #mascreader #oneshot #unrequited love #unrequited feelings #unrequited affection #yandere #i guess this could be yandere #sad ending

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thepinkseductress · 3 months ago

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Do you want to smell like the yummiest and sweetest slice of Strawberry Angel Cake and fluffy whipped cream?

The best feeling in the world is when you walk past a group of people and you hear someone say, "She smells really, really good!" or just simply talking to someone and they say to you, "OMG GIRL! What are you wearing? It smells sooooo good."

Well, at least, I love it when people say that about me. My biggest goal is to not only be the prettiest person in the room but also the best-smelling person.

Personally, I love sweet scents with candy or cake-like notes. I'm a gourmand girly DOWN!! Its fu-serious!

Teeny-weeny little piece of info: I have parosmia, which means the smell factory in my brain is a little out of whack. UGH! I know. I can smell just fine, but I can be a bit sensitive to certain smells, in which they may smell a little off compared to anyone without parosmia. But I swear I am reliable.

Now before I tell you what scents I like to layer and what perfumes I like to drown myself in, it's vital to understand that smelling good starts in the shower.

To me, the foundation to smelling like a literal piece of heaven depends on your body scrubs, shower gels, body wash, etc.

My shower routine:

Always Always ALWAYS start with a bar soap. It leaves the skin feeling fresh and clean. We want a clean canvas (clean skin) to work with. More specifically, this soap has a sweet and soft scent to it. Almost Angelic. It has more of a vanilla smell than shea butter but is still an exceptional cleanser. BRAVO!

At least once a week, I'll use a body sugar scrub. Usually on Sundays, before a busy and treacherous week, I'll scrub off last week's problems with a course body scrub. I like my body scrubs to be course yet moisturizing, and lucky for me, I found one at TJ MAXX (my second home).

Currently, my favorite is the Body Prescriptions Sugar Almond Body Scrub (I can't find a pic anywhere. Sorry!). It has the smoothest consistency that will have your skin feeling the cleanest it has ever felt, while leaving behind a yummy shine that will have you glowing.

Lastly, I adorn my skin with this lovely lady. She Smells BOMB.COM!!! When I say it smells yummy, delectable, edible, sweet, and everything delicious, believe me, girl. I would never lie to you. EVER.

Take my word, Bestie.

MOVING ON!

After-shower care:

Usually after a shower, my lotion depends on my mood.

She's my best friend when I'm having a mild kind-of day. When I'm stuck in the house all day or if I want to enjoy the simpler things in life. She's smells light but sweet. yum.

For a more, INTENSE day, we use her. The holy grail. You get it.

Super sweet and a little childish in my opinion. But idk its heavenly.

BODY GLAZE My Love!!! I live by these two body glazes.

You can layer them on top of the lotion if you want. It's your life… Live it. Me, I rather prefer to only layer the Birthday Frosting BODY GLAZE.

In terms of Miss Strawberry Shortcake, I'll use her all by herself; no lotion is needed. She performs better alone. IMO.

Both project very well, suuuuperrr duuuperr moisturizing, lasts all day, and will have people stopping you on the street to ask you, "OMG GIRL! What are you wearing? It smells sooooo good." …see what I did there?!…no? oh…okay.

Let's move on, I guess.

I don't care how good your skin smells. If you're not wearing deoderant and those pits are funky, Bitch, YOU'RE FUNKY. PUT SOME DAMN DEODORANT ON!

This does not apply to my besties who do not wear deodorant due to any beliefs or discrepancies.

Anyways, this deodorant smells like a yummy slice of coconut cream pie with a pina colada on the side.

Have you ever watched your mom, grandmother, or any older woman that you look up to powder themselves?

It's not just for sweat, honey. Some powders come perfumed to add a little "umph" to your hygiene routine.

This powder holds a very special place in my heart. It smells sweet and a little floral. A very true vanilla flavor. It almost reminds me of French vanilla ice cream or syrup.

I keep my powder in a powder dish with a cute little pink powder puff sitting on top of the powder.

After spraying on my deodorant, I'll puff this on my underarms, back, and in between my legs, and at night I'll apply some to my chest and belly. Usually this is added the areas that I sweat the most.

Now on the part that you've been waiting for! Or at least what I've been waiting for…

Perfumes:

BOW DOWN TO THE QUEEN!!

…No, really…bow down.

This is a very sweet, cake scent that can be a little finicky. I find it hard sometimes to layer her with other perfumes or products that are more fresh or floral rather than sweet and gourmand. But let's take into account that I have parosmia.

Nonetheless, Mama is very sweet—almost too sweet, but that's what I want. I want you to get a sugar rush just from smelling me. And this perfume does just that. Projects beautifully and last almost a day. Around six hours later, I have to raise my arm to my nose to smell it, but during those six hours I can smell myself through someone else's nose.

Okay, I'm exaggerating, but seriously, she smells strong, sweet, and yummy.

I spray my clothes with perfume. And by spray, I mean DROWN. My soaps, lotions, oils, etc. are really in charge of my skin.

I see shimmer mist as more of an oil than a spray. I know that may not make sense, but hear me out.

I like to spray this on the parts of my body that will be exposed, like my chest, arms, back, and legs. I may even spray a generous amount onto my hands, until there is a puddle of it in my hand, and I will rub it into my skin like an oil. See, like I told you, I treat this more like an oil than a perfume.

˚₊‧꒰ა 𓂋 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

This concludes my usual hygienic routing, buuuuut I'll tell you a secret. Only because we're like besties or whatever.

I like to lightly spray my underwear and socks with perfume. Usually something a bit stronger than a BB&W perfume mist. A cologne, basically.

This keeps my undergarments smelling yummy.

WARNING: Your partner will want to eat your panties right off of you. Proceed with caution.

Remember, bestie, this is MY hygiene routine. I am simply sharing just in case you needed a little help adding products to your arsenal or simply organizing your daily routine. If you do not like anything that I've listed or if you wish to add something, do as you wish, babes!

This is for inspirational purposes, LOL.

I understand this post may be similar to other girly bloggers, much like me. I can assure you I am not the first person to make a post as such, and I won't be the last. I just wanted to share.

My intention is to NEVER be a kopy kat (yuck)!

Okay, I'm done yapping. CIAO!

-ThePinkSeductress

⠀:¨ ·.· ¨:⠀ ⠀ `· . ୨୧⠀

#pink aesthetic #pink #fragrance #perfumes #hygiene #bimbo doll #so yummy #delicious #fragrantica #thepinkseductress

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whois-jess · 1 year ago

Note

Hi, I see you accept request. Well, I wanted to request a Rhea Ripley x Fem! Reader in which reader loses her pandora bracelet before to go to a party and she's desperated because that bracelet is so important to her (I have one myself and I could literally die if I lost it because it's very expensive and I put so much effort in collection charms and I'm still working hard to fill it all up) and Rhea helps her to look for it all over their apartment.

Pandora Bracelet

Rhea Ripley x fem!Reader

Hope you enjoy <3

I was getting ready for party some wrestlers were throwing just to have a good time, i was in me and Rheas bedroom at the vanity table in my navy dress and black heels finishing up some light makeup when i realized i forgot to put my special Pandora bracelet back on, i put my makeup away and looked on the vanity table for my bracelet but i couldn't see it anywhere so i checked the bathroom, nope not there either.

"Rhea!" I shouted as she was in the bathroom getting ready "yes love!" I heard her shout back "come here i need you!" I didn't hear a reply but i saw her enter the room "what's up love" she asks hugging me from behind "i can't find my bracelet Rhea" i say looking up at her "y/n we have to go soon we will look for it later" she smiles at me "Rhea you know how important that bracelet is to me its expensive as well" i complain, i got that bracelet myself but my nan would always buy me charms for it but sadly she died a few years back and it always reminded me of her "okay love we will look for it" she says letting me go "where have you looked" she asked "vanity and bathroom" i reply going over to my side of the bed to start looking to see if a dropped it, i knelt on the floor when a felt a stinging pain on my ass i look up to see Rhea smiling down at me "sorry could help it you look good in that dress" i let out a tiny laugh trying to be annoyed and went back to looking as did Rhea.

After awhile of looking i walked into the living room where Rhea was "found it?" She asked "no" i huffed getting upset that we haven't found it, i gussed Rhea picked up on this as she walked over pulling me into a hug "its here somewhere baby" she said stroking my hair as all i could smell was her perfume calming me down a bit i felt her kiss the top of my head letting me go so she could see my face i looked up into her blue eyes she was smiling at me her thumb stroking my cheek "yeah your right" i said smiling back at her "lets do one more look over before we have to go" she lets go of me as she walks over to our kitchen looking everywhere as i walk over to our second bathroom seeing if i left it in here.

I moved the towels in the bathroom the toothbrushes, toothpaste, our skin care, head bands and nothing i was stressing about it at this point and to be honest i almost started to cry, i knew it was silly to cry over a bracelet but to me it was the last thing i had of my nan and she was like my best friend when she was alive and not to mention how much it costs. I walked back into the living room seeing barry and luna and the sofa laying down on their blanket looking at me, i say beside them petting them "hi babys you okay" I say knowing they wont reply when i saw Rhea walk in "no luck?" I ask and she shakes her head "how could one bracelet vanish" i say standing up brushing my dress "i have no idea baby" Rhea says wrapping an arm around me "i am sorry love" she saus kissing my forehead gently "its okay its not your fault" i say smiling at her.

Barry walks over to us from his stop on the sofa jumping at Rheas legs "what big boy" she said stroking his head, i look down at him them at luna "baby you don't think they took it?" I ask looking at her as she stops Barry "check their beds if not its a trip to the vets" she says as i walk to their beds my heels tapping on the floor, i bend down looking at thier beds seeing nothing "nothing Rhe" i say and the thinks for a second "look under" she says as Barry tries to get her attention Luna stays laydown looking on at what's happening "alright" i lift Lunas bed to see nothing them i lift Barrys to see my Pandora bracelet sitting there "Found it!" I say with happiness putting it on "Barry what were you doing with it silly boy" i say petting his face then giving Luna some love "We should go now we are a bit late" Rhea smiles at me "yeah we should" i say kissing her cheek as i get my bag and keys and she does the same "ready now?" Rhea asks "yes" i smile holding her hand and place a gentle kiss on her lips before we leave for the night.

#rhea ripley #wwe judgement day #rhea ripley x reader

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annesoftheisland · 1 year ago

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But grass was growing green in sheltered spots and Gilbert had found some pale, sweet arbutus in a hidden corner. He came up from the park, his hands full of it.

Anne was sitting on the big gray boulder in the orchard looking at the poem of a bare, birchen bough hanging against the pale red sunset with the very perfection of grace. She was building a castle in air—a wondrous mansion whose sunlit courts and stately halls were steeped in Araby’s perfume, and where she reigned queen and chatelaine. She frowned as she saw Gilbert coming through the orchard. Of late she had managed not to be left alone with Gilbert. But he had caught her fairly now; and even Rusty had deserted her.

Gilbert sat down beside her on the boulder and held out his Mayflowers.

“Don’t these remind you of home and our old schoolday picnics, Anne?”

Anne took them and buried her face in them.

“I’m in Mr. Silas Sloane’s barrens this very minute,” she said rapturously.

“I suppose you will be there in reality in a few days?”

“No, not for a fortnight. I’m going to visit with Phil in Bolingbroke before I go home. You’ll be in Avonlea before I will.”

“No, I shall not be in Avonlea at all this summer, Anne. I’ve been offered a job in the Daily News office and I’m going to take it.”

“Oh,” said Anne vaguely. She wondered what a whole Avonlea summer would be like without Gilbert. Somehow she did not like the prospect. “Well,” she concluded flatly, “it is a good thing for you, of course.”

“Yes, I’ve been hoping I would get it. It will help me out next year.”

“You mustn’t work too hard,” said Anne, without any very clear idea of what she was saying. She wished desperately that Phil would come out. “You’ve studied very constantly this winter. Isn’t this a delightful evening? Do you know, I found a cluster of white violets under that old twisted tree over there today? I felt as if I had discovered a gold mine.”

“You are always discovering gold mines,” said Gilbert—also absently.

“Let us go and see if we can find some more,” suggested Anne eagerly. “I’ll call Phil and—”

“Never mind Phil and the violets just now, Anne,” said Gilbert quietly, taking her hand in a clasp from which she could not free it. “There is something I want to say to you.”

“Oh, don’t say it,” cried Anne, pleadingly. “Don’t—please, Gilbert.”

“I must. Things can’t go on like this any longer. Anne, I love you. You know I do. I—I can’t tell you how much. Will you promise me that some day you’ll be my wife?”

“I—I can’t,” said Anne miserably. “Oh, Gilbert—you—you’ve spoiled everything.”

“Don’t you care for me at all?” Gilbert asked after a very dreadful pause, during which Anne had not dared to look up.

“Not—not in that way. I do care a great deal for you as a friend. But I don’t love you, Gilbert.”

“But can’t you give me some hope that you will—yet?”

“No, I can’t,” exclaimed Anne desperately. “I never, never can love you—in that way—Gilbert. You must never speak of this to me again.”

There was another pause—so long and so dreadful that Anne was driven at last to look up. Gilbert’s face was white to the lips. And his eyes—but Anne shuddered and looked away. There was nothing romantic about this. Must proposals be either grotesque or—horrible? Could she ever forget Gilbert’s face?

“Is there anybody else?” he asked at last in a low voice.

“No—no,” said Anne eagerly. “I don’t care for any one like that—and I like you better than anybody else in the world, Gilbert. And we must—we must go on being friends, Gilbert.”

Gilbert gave a bitter little laugh.

“Friends! Your friendship can’t satisfy me, Anne. I want your love—and you tell me I can never have that.”

“I’m sorry. Forgive me, Gilbert,” was all Anne could say. Where, oh, where were all the gracious and graceful speeches wherewith, in imagination, she had been wont to dismiss rejected suitors?

Gilbert released her hand gently.

“There isn’t anything to forgive. There have been times when I thought you did care. I’ve deceived myself, that’s all. Goodbye, Anne.”

Anne got herself to her room, sat down on her window seat behind the pines, and cried bitterly. She felt as if something incalculably precious had gone out of her life. It was Gilbert’s friendship, of course. Oh, why must she lose it after this fashion?

“What is the matter, honey?” asked Phil, coming in through the moonlit gloom.

Anne did not answer. At that moment she wished Phil were a thousand miles away.

“I suppose you’ve gone and refused Gilbert Blythe. You are an idiot, Anne Shirley!”

“Do you call it idiotic to refuse to marry a man I don’t love?” said Anne coldly, goaded to reply.

“You don’t know love when you see it. You’ve tricked something out with your imagination that you think love, and you expect the real thing to look like that. There, that’s the first sensible thing I’ve ever said in my life. I wonder how I managed it?”

“Phil,” pleaded Anne, “please go away and leave me alone for a little while. My world has tumbled into pieces. I want to reconstruct it.”

“Without any Gilbert in it?” said Phil, going.

A world without any Gilbert in it! Anne repeated the words drearily. Would it not be a very lonely, forlorn place? Well, it was all Gilbert’s fault. He had spoiled their beautiful comradeship. She must just learn to live without it.

Anne of the Island - Gilbert Speaks, Chapter 20

#anne of the island #anne of green gables #aogg #aogg 1915 #anne x gilbert

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domquixotedospobresblog · 21 days ago

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"Woman is the power of man. The heart and the brain. When the brain dies, the heart beats even more, but when the heart dies, the brain dies. This is an Indian proverb. When a man is lost, he doesn't even need to ask why. It's the lack of a woman. We all have friends, and we know what it's like. They walk around here and there, they show up late at night with nothing to talk about. They just want a place to sit and rest or just cry a little and then they leave as they came. A man doesn't need a woman to be happy. I'm not joking or contradicting myself. If he has great friends, he can be a fulfilled man, friends of both sexes. The problem is that he falls in love, and even with her by his side, he will never be completely happy again. He will live well with his family, but she will always be his weakness. The fear of losing her or of one day having to leave her alone will haunt him for his entire existence. I speak from personal experience. When I fell in love for the first time, I could never sleep properly again. Watching her sleep was my dream. Perfect, will we be together until the end, and if I leave, who will watch over her sleep, and if she leaves, what will become of me? I hate it even more when they use a particular perfume. If I'm on the street and someone uses the same one, I find myself searching for her eyes in the crowd that passes by. That's why I don't use perfume. I don't want to leave another mark for her to hold on to. I try not to have any quirks. I want to be a very normal man, so that she can find another one like him more easily. As the Indians used to say, a woman is a man's superpower. Whoever has one is much stronger, but they forgot to say that it's also their greatest weakness. Without them, all that's left is death. I say all this because I left a party and she told me, that one over there isn't your friend. And he was, all dirty, crying on the sidewalk. I know a wounded soldier when I see one. I sat next to him and hugged him until he stopped crying. Then we took him home, a familiar place where she can think, rest, and then leave. through the night, just because your super power is gone.

Jonas r Cezar

#micro crônica #jonas r cezar

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cowboylament · 8 months ago

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Bonus content

While trying to work out the logistics of the penultimate chapter of what conversations were happening behind the scenes and how they affected the characters, I wrote them out. I figured they'd be fun to post once I finished in homage to SJM. these are more or less unedited. It includes:

Mor finding Lucien after the fight with Y/n

Erinyes visits Y/N and they discuss their bargain.

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Ao3

It had always been empty.

That thread in my chest, it was no different than what it had always been, but barren of what it had become. The keen wit, those enormous feelings building with steady current. I’d watched it happen. Her eyes, her ears, would snag on a scene or word and the curiosity that found itself in my chest would be nothing more than a hum. She wasn’t as rash as she liked to joke she was. Her emotions built. The single note would find a touch of complexity, another string, another note, until a web had formed. Her feelings informed by her thoughts even the hard emotions, even the anger, always came to harmony. It was not quite music, but I could feel when she’d worked something out, my ribs nearly vibrating.

The first time I’d seen it with my eyes in the house of wind I’d wanted desperately to slip into her mind as she could slip into mine. With that sharp gaze, her acute presence with the world, I wanted to listen to her logic as it conducted feelings in my chest. I’m sure, even when she was wrong in her deductions, there was more sense being made than not. She was too smart, too perceptive, for it to be otherwise.

A hand, gently, used my shoulder as leverage to climb onto the barstool next to me. I wanted to be naive enough to think, even if only for a moment, it was Y/N. But I could not delude myself. I knew her too well, knew the feel of the air and the pull of all rooms when she was in them. If she’d arrived any idle part of me would drift her way, she had that sort of power. Even half-drunk, even half-slurred, the margins of my body smudging, I knew when she was there and when she was not. Tonight she was not.

The hand belonged to Mor, I could smell her perfume. She said nothing.

“Another?” Asked a waitress.

I nodded.

The waitress looked toward the female, “for you?”

“Same as him.”

“I thought you were meeting with Amren.”

“After two hours of watching you sulk, she decided to take her leave.”

The waitress slid over our drinks and I stared at the contents before taking a sip. I could open the bond now, could reach for her, but the nothing between us and her shielding would make it all the worse. I’d no intention of ever going back to what we’d been and somehow we’d landed that direction just the same. A wall between us where a deeper understanding might be. I remember when I understood everything, maybe I thought I’d understood everything, but only enough to win when I wanted to win.

“What is this Gawayn like?”

Mor pursed her lips, thinking. I imagined him tough, tall, the usual blend of every other Illyrian with their often inflexible way about life. It was hard to imagine Y/N wanting anything to do with one.

“He's funny, different.”

“Different how?”

She stared at me a moment, “He’s protective of her but in a way that doesn’t involve Rhysand.”

“What’s that mean?”

“He doesn’t do anything because she’s Rhysand’s sister, he does it because she’s his friend.”

I huffed a laugh, “So that's the standard?”

Mor looked with devastating awareness, “You forget yourself. You only took her on those walks and up to the garden because Rhysand told you to do so.”

He’s going to be my high lord. The immediacy of my embarrassment was alarming. The night we’d stopped shielding and the days after I knew I couldn’t let her be subject to my emotions. Their sudden and unwavering displays, how they crashed into me when she was near. I had to dampen it, somehow, I spent the days she was in bed trying to figure out how to put a buffer between us, to put a kink in the bond.

“What happened tonight?”

“It's not worth rehashing,” I said. If I told her what she did I’d have to admit what I’d done. I’d have to reveal my hand, my cruelty, my part in it all.

She tutted her tongue, “You both.”

“What’s your court’s deal?” I asked, half curious, half avoiding the lecture. “Why the betting, why the pretending her work is nothing?”

“From what I hear you’ve done the same thing.”

I could tell I had to be careful with my words. This was a delicate matter to Mor, one that might lose me an ally.

“Our taunts are a game to us because we know when we’re lying. But I’ve never suggested it was nothing what she manages. I’ve seen her and I know the skill it takes.”

“You think we don’t?” Mor asked sharply. She didn’t like being confronted with the truth as much as I didn’t.

“I think I’ve seen you tease and taunt her and I’ve felt her worry down our bond.”

Mor sighed, watching me and I could see that she knew I was right. In my time here Y/N was the one who got questioned the most, her word was trusted the least. Rhysand seemed to fluctuate in and out of being her leader and her brother, at times incapable of being both at the same time. I could feel her annoyance, her pain, that she was the exception to him.

“The way she is with you, this version of her is equally new to us. She has been this way for no one else. She keeps her cards very close to her and what she does reveal has always been carefully chosen to cost her the least. Since you got back it's been the opposite. She’s risked a lot for you.”

“So why make the bets then? If she wasn’t inclined to tell you before then teasing her seems even less a way to get anything from her.”

“She’s the one who came up with the idea.”

I sat up straighter, and blinked a few times.

“Years ago, after she came back from the winter in the cabin. An excuse to keep us in the loop of her life and all the more reason to leave the males she chose. She had truly terrible taste most of the time, and making Rhys lose a bet always got them out of the way.”

“Why does it bother her then?”

Mor watched me, her head falling to the side like she was asking the same thing. I didn’t think she’d reveal her answer, but after another moment she said simply, “You’re the first male that mattered.”

The words struck my gut. Suddenly all that wine seemed to seep into my consciousness and the world began to blur and spin in a way I had not considered as I’d continued glass after glass. Everything, of course, reveals itself after a bad decision has been made.

“And the Emissary business?” I asked, needing to leave everything I’d started, the road we’d taken, to break the surface and breathe some air.

Mor shrugged, “She didn’t want to be an Emissary. I think Rhysand holds that against her. Not maliciously, but…”

“How did she become one?”

“After their parents died he asked her to do it. He’s pretty good at finding a place for people, building on their strengths.”

“I’ll say.”

Mor laughed, “I guess he saw her with Egrette.”

After the words left her mouth Mor’s eyes widened, just barely, and she turned toward me to see if I’d heard, waiting for me to ask who this Egrette was.

“I know about Egrette.”

“She told you?”

“Not willingly. I found her outside, she told me she worked there. I started taking the night classes but Egrette already seemed to guess who I was.”

“Why take the classes?”

I shrugged, “I wanted to know about her life, much like the rest of you.”

Mor’s whole body softened, and she looked past me for a while. Long enough that I thought she was about to leave or that the conversation was truly over, she’d finished her glass and I was nearly done with mine. It seemed there was nothing left to say, but then she spoke again.

“How good is she?”

“Better than me.”

Mor hummed, “She’s said the same of you.”

The female stood and I knew she was going, the female turning and stopping at my side.

“Are you staying in Velaris?”

That all my actions had even made that a question was shameful. I’d left her in that foyer alone. Even after what we’d said there was a history between us that didn’t warrant such dismissal. We’d never left anything unresolved, even if before that meant finding a winner and a loser, if it meant risking losing. Tonight we’d both lost.

“I wouldn’t leave, not even after what was said.”

“What was said,” Mor asked one more time.

I stared ahead, the place fuller than before, like the deepening of the night only crowding the place more. “Burden was used.”

Mor didn’t flinch, standing before me.

“C’mon,” she said

“Why?”

“You need to sleep. In the morning, you and I are gonna make a plan.”

“Why?”

“Because you need my help.”

“No, why do you want to help.”

Mor smiled a little, mischievous even and the normalcy of it made my insides recoil. After all this, after all that was said, did we deserve to have such a thing? Someone in our corner, someone like Mor to help me get what I wanted.

“I like how she’s changed since you got here.”

A small part of me, very deep, too deep to really hold onto but felt nonetheless, smiled. I paid our tabs as a thank you, and we walked home. I tried to tell her a few things, tried to fall into something of a rapport with her, despite it feeling unnatural. Back home to share such details with someone was a risk too great to bear. There was nothing between anyone, fragile alliances, momentarily aligning causes were to serve your purpose in the end, not each other. Eris only helped me with Y/N I didn’t doubt to have one less brother vying for High Lord.

By the time we’d gotten to her apartment, I’d awkwardly revealed some of our disagreements, desperate really, for someone to confirm to me what was meant. As if I myself was not already secretly aware of her in part. Those minor grievances, I knew what she wanted from me, but I couldn’t give it, and therefore couldn’t accept her reasoning.

Mor laughed eventually, as she unlocked the door and it was a sound I’d become grateful for hearing. I didn’t want pity, pity seemed to suggest something I couldn’t consider, like we were too far gone from ourselves that we couldn’t go back. It seemed to me they felt sorry because we’d ruined something and I didn’t want it to be ruined.

“Are you always following in her footsteps? I thought you Autumn males were a bit more brave. She’s terrified and yet she’s still taking the lead.”

I scowled, the words so close to her suggestion, “I tried tonight.”

“Did you?”

It felt like it. To me it had felt like I’d tried, tried to touch her, to know her, to reveal to her something of my thoughts and she seemed to misunderstand. I know you, I wanted to say, and I can love you for it.

The door opened to her apartment and it was warm, inviting. The place was smaller than I anticipated. Being part of the court I expected something extravagant, lived in but grand. This was all rather small and homely.

“She asked after if I were to be her burden.”

Mor let out a low whistle and shut the door. I fell into the one chair as she walked toward a closet. She pulled sheets and pillows like I was nothing more than a long-time friend who’d drank too much. I closed my eyes and listened to it, that sound of care. An ache began to eat away at me one foot in memory and another in the present. Where, lying on the table, she’d been hurt beyond need. The wound sewn shut, the color just barely returning to her lips. She’d stepped between us somehow, saved me from Rhys. My mate, I could hear her care and I wanted to return it to her if only with noise. To lift her off the table and carry her quietly upstairs to her room, to clean her hair of the blood, listen to the water fill the tub, and drip from the cloth. Those idle sounds, the kind you get only at home. The kind where someone is waiting for you at night. Then she said Cassian and I knew that I was not that thing for her, the place where such sounds could be found or even wanted.

And again, in the foyer. She’d looked so sad, so hurt. I’d said the one thing I knew I shouldn’t have said. I watched the devastation for only a second before I managed to turn away. Had I been brave I might have crossed the small space and asked exactly what she meant, taken her in my hands, and had her look at me so we could say precisely what we’d been trying to say. Her heart had been beating furiously.

A draft off the window beside me blew the scent of Velaris and all its promises, people chatting, people laughing, signs of love. My mind returned here to this room.

“Her words are her only weapon,” said Mor.

“I know that.”

She glared at me, continuing her sentence I had not even realized I'd interrupted. “They are also a shield. Do not kid yourself into believing that you understand her private definitions. Whatever she said to you, whatever you think she meant, she is concealing something she is terrified to reveal.”

“I don’t scare her.”

Mor pitied me again. I could feel it. She threw a sheet over the couch and I stared wordlessly out the window. It had begun to rain. The secret kind, the one that comes in the night and dries before anyone has any chance to know it has arrived. I’d not yet slept and already I felt sick. When Mor finally offered the couch I collapsed into it.

“You should understand something Lucien,” Mor said as I curled up on the cramped uncomfortable slab. I hid my face in the fabric and blankets. Her words holding a very careful sympathy, “You scare her most of all.”

***

There was a woman by my bed.

I don’t know how I knew this.

Looking at the space it revealed this fact to me but I couldn’t say how, not outwardly, not obviously, but there she was and wasn’t. She was very beautiful, like something of a dream. Her hair spilled more than it fell, in long swerving sheaths. She bent forward in a nurturing manner toward me, sleeping, but I could tell this was not totally natural for her. So I knew who she was.

“I thought there were three of you.”

She didn’t look my way, she knew I was there, watching, “My sisters are away.”

“They made you out to be much more unpleasant.”

She smiled then, “We appear that way to the guilty. You are not guilty.” She said standing. “Not yet anyway.”

I tensed and finally, she met my gaze. Anxiety was a better-known battle, something she could look in the eye. The fae were renowned for their beauty but she was beyond that of the immortal creatures, those not quite fae, even Amren. Striking wasn’t the word, there was something soft about her, like a perfectly round stone eroded by a river. So in touch with the world and beyond it just the same.

“You are Tisiphone.”

She bowed her head much the way Lucien did—such grace.

That night in the woods and after in the house…I felt power return to me that had been taken. That caress of the hand. Lucien too had seemed to sense it. She’d touched us both. I stood up straighter. She was in my room watching me sleep and I was watching myself sleep. It might only mean one thing.

“Have you come to claim me at last?”

“That is not my way.”

“What is your way?”

“My sisters and I claim oath breakers. You are not one.”

I folded my arms in front of me clasping at my fingers though all signs of respect for forgotten Gods were foreign to me. Our worlds are different, the scales of meaning and feeling different.

“It is you who I made the bargain with.”

“Yes.”

“How?”

She stared down at her own hands and for the first time, I saw a fern stem pinched between her fingers. She spun it idly but it didn’t seem she was trying to find her words. What is it like, the mind of a God? That duty that she must fulfill, the rules of its power, it was lost to me. I couldn’t even find an imagination to conjure what it might be like to serve the world in such a way, under such confining terms.

“Once blood was shed, once it fell into the earth my sisters and I arrived.”

“And why are you here now?”

She looked up from the green stem and smiled that same smile. I wouldn’t say it was friendly but it also wasn’t insincere, “You’ve been looking for me, have you not?”

I wrung my hands, grasping at the fingers. Before me the answers, so many answers, and were they ever fair? Could life deliver its small miracles and then return to its cruelty just the same? I had to know before I made the food, but suddenly asking seemed the hardest thing in the world. I missed Lucien. If he were here, if he were asleep beside me one glance and there would be words, something steady, something sure. But he was in a townhouse not so far away and he didn’t know this place at all.

The female cocked her head. “You are afraid,” she said.

“I don’t know what it means, to make a bargain with a God. I don’t know if I’m able to keep it and I prefer you this way I admit.”

She watched with a tenderness about her, “I did not have to take your bargain you know. I confess it made little difference to me if you lived or died.” Her eyes swept over me. Whatever she had once thought she no longer did, her consideration of my standing there seemed weighed with a consideration that she herself had admitted to having. I had trouble, however, believing such indifference remained. Not at least, in such overwhelming amounts.

“My duty is to avenge and your blood was innocent. I was there to do so, but the lines were not so clear. We followed in the hopes of clarity but we found you, your mate approaching, searching for you. We are not precisely death, but we can act as its bringers. We were going to take you gently, but then you began to think about the next world.”

And Eris. I’d been thinking about a better life in what came next, I’d wanted it to be good and kind the way we’d been kind in the end. A knife pressed into the palm, the belief that even injured I could make it. How he’d fought for me to get out.

“Plenty of people like to think they’ll be better in their next life.”

She shook her head, “It is the life they had they often wish better of and it is rare that one might wish to reconcile with the men who harmed them.”

“They didn’t harm me,” I said quickly.

She raised a brow, “I have no claim over them. You do not need to worry.”

I swallowed, “So that saved me?”

Her face took some faraway look, like what Lucien had when something dear seemed so out of reach, even in memory, even surrounded by it. Her mouth parting, eyes unseeing, “You entered into a bargain to which you named no party, any God could take you up on it.”

“You and your sisters did.”

“Just me.”

“Why?”

This seemed to be the question she couldn’t answer. Whatever forces were at work, internal or from that world seemed to be anchoring those words in her stomach. They would not come out, not when I asked.

“I returned your power to you. Enough to fulfill my end of the bargain.” She said returning to this moment, her eyes meeting mind. “I’m sure it is not lost on you that you are alive when all you’d asked for was to get your mate to safety. I was prepared to take you even still, as you lay there bleeding. But we have more leeway in such deals. I watched you closely, watched you with him. I wanted to…see something.”

“See what?”

She angled her head at me, “If you meant it. I hesitated, curious and skeptical as you are, to see if it was not some near-death regret. When you stepped between your brother, I began to see, but it was not until you were alone that I understood. So I didn’t take you, I left thereafter.”

“So the feeling…in my hand.”

She smiled, raising a hand toward me, “I believe your people shake hands.”

“And Luciens too?”

“He was involved no?”

“But the bargain was between us.”

She hummed as if understanding some difference between us now. Something illuminated by my confusion. She turned away in thought, finding words for some discrepancy of godliness. My sleeping figure on the bed unmoving, if I hadn’t asked I’d have thought she had come to take me, that she already had come for me. A haunting stillness, she broke it by placing the fern in her hands across my chest. My hands on instinct, moved to reach for it.

“Bargains are a precarious thing. But it is not so simple, and fate has many strings. We Gods are not concerned with the markings of the body, our deals happen in the threads, on the soul. If you betray the oath on your shared thread I will come, and I won’t be so hesitant.”

“My oath?”

“The oath you made to get him to safety. You are bound to protect him, to lay no hands on him, cause no fatal wounds.”

“I had no plans to.”

She turned, more serious, “Your life has changed dramatically in so short a span, even for a mortal. You cannot know what you will want in the centuries ahead. Good people make bad bargains.”

I took a breath as she had, the words a smattering in my head, coming to a careful calm, and organized hum, “You waited to be sure I was good on my word. I suspect I’m alive because for whatever reason you believe I can manage it. If death is always the inevitable end, if you do not appear here in your other form, I must conclude you think I can manage.”

Her eyes narrowed in a kind of happiness, mischievous too, whatever she’d suspected I’d proven right in my answer.

“We put our faith in you as often as you put our faith in us.”

“So not often.”

The female smiled softly, “No. I will say only that night held mutual rarity between us. And…” whatever it was she wanted to say she stopped herself. Her eyes again did a sweep over the room, turning her neck, seeing it as if for the first time in its entirety. She settled on the scarf on my bed, in the spot Lucien would have if we mated.

“He made that for me,” I said. “I was looking for you because I wanted to mate him but I needed to be sure my deal would cause him no pain.”

“I cannot promise that,” she said regretfully and my shoulders slumped, an ache carving its place in my chest. Her words suddenly freed, she said what I knew she’d been unsure of saying, “You’ve learned a great deal in so short a time. I do believe I will never have to make good on my word. It's the only reason I ever make bargains.”

The words added a heaviness to the room.

“Have you been watching us?”

“A little,” she confessed. “But this is the last we will see of each other.”

“Why?”

“For plenty of reasons, most of which I cannot say, but at least because there is something important you should know, something the fae seem not to realize.”

I was silent, waiting and she turned her whole body toward mine. Whatever she was to say would be the most important thing of all.

“To mate in this life, it binds you to each other for the rest of them. Whoever it is you become, a thread of fate will forever link you to one another. Our deal is on a thread between you both, the thread that he has yet to formally accept.”

“And if he accepts it?”

“Your souls will become a union, he will inherit the same oath. You will serve, in part, as each other’s protector for every life to come. You will forever be his keeper as he is yours.”

Our breathing was a singular sound and movement. Her spilling hair moved across her chest rising with each breath as I lingered on the words she’d shared. Yes, I wished Lucien was here. I wanted to tell him everything, had to tell him everything, but it was still not the time. But I was no longer afraid. He would choose. I liked it, that it was his choice. I wanted to be sure, as she was sure, that he was up for what I’d begun. So I met her eye and I nodded.

She nodded back. I knew then, our time was up. She moved like water through the room and as she passed me a cold fell off of her familiar and understood to me but I could not point out where or how. She walked toward the door and when she reached the threshold I felt her going.

“Thank you,” I said suddenly knowing I’d have no chance to say it again. She would not be listening. She turned back and I clarified, “For hesitating, I do not take this time with my mate lightly.”

“It is your doing, do not think too highly of me. I am still a bringer of death.”

“And life.”

The female seemed to withdraw. I didn’t back down. I suspected this was not what she was known for, perhaps she didn’t like it or perhaps she did and it hurt regardless. She took one step out of the room and in a blink she was gone. It was only an instant between my waking and the moment she’d left, but there was light in the room of morning. I sat up, turned as if I’d find her again, find my other self at the end of my bed, but there was no one there. I felt it though, in my hands. Dropping my chin, pinching the stem between my fingers, I twirled the fern and its life in my hand.

#lucien x reader #lucien vanserra #lucien acotar #acotar fanfiction #acotar x reader #rhysand's sister #Rysand's!sister reader #lucien fanfic #acotar #Night Court

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fireflowersandblood · 1 year ago

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Letters From Home - Preview

i promised a preview so. here it is. or maybe. a first chapter. maybe. i'm not promising anything.

Pairing: Tom Bennett x f!reader

WC: 800-ish words

TWs/Warnings: strong language, adult themes

Summary: Knitting for Victory has never been bigger and Tom gets a nice, cozy package from home.

“Hey, look at this, lads!”

Tom’s head snaps up. Immediately, his lips curl into a smirk. One of the men has jumped up on a box of supplies, holding a paper in his left hand. With his right, he’s trying to ward off the poor sod who has just lost his picture. Tom can’t see what it is with all the waving about, but he’s almost entirely sure it’s a lady, maybe even a lady with very little clothing. Little else gets the men this worked up.

“Bennett, for you.”

Before he can react, a paper wrapped package has been placed in his lap. It looks almost like a wrapped Christmas gift, with the string that ties it together, and is no bigger than the Encyclopedias that Lois collected when she was younger.

“What’s this?” Tom glances down at the package and frowns at the handwriting. It’s nothing he recognizes and he can’t think of anyone who would want to send him something. Maybe his dad, but even that seems unlikely.

“Red Cross”, his superior explains. “Knitted socks and the like. You’re not the only one.”

Tom gives an appreciative hum and glances back down on the box. The handwriting is neat, neater than anything he could manage, and spells out his full name. To his own surprise, he runs his fingers across the letters, before he takes care to open it.

The box is filled to the brim. He finds not one, but two, pairs of navy blue socks. A matching pullover and hat, as well as a small box of hard candies in all sorts of colors. It feels strange to hold something so normal in his hands, and it reminds him of when he was smaller. His mother used to have them, he remembers, in a small tin box by the radio. She’d always give him and Lois one each, and let them pick between the fruit shaped ones.

“You got socks”, someone next to him complains, and the sigh is nothing if not envious. It makes Tom feel just a tad superior, and he immediately kicks his boots off, tears the old socks from his feet, and pulls the new pair on with a self-satisfied grin.

“I did”, he boasts. It’s all in good fun; now that the first few months have passed, there’s not as much fighting. Everyone has seen battle one too many times to spend any time asking for trouble, even Tom. “And they’re cozy.”

Everyone close enough to have heard laughs, and Tom takes the opportunity to make sure he hasn’t missed anything. He would hate to leave another tin of candies for the rats.

Tucked away in a corner of the box, he finds a letter. Again, with a handwriting he doesn’t recognize. Not the same as on the wrapper around the box, but something a little smaller and cleaner. He tears the envelope and is met by a sweet, light scent. It takes a moment too long to realize it must be perfume. It reminds him of the one Lois wears, and the thought makes his nose scrunch up. To take his mind off the rather unpleasant thought, he unfolds the letter.

Dear soldier,

When I’m writing this, I have no idea who you are. I might never know who you are. You, however, will know a little something about me when you’ve read this letter.

I’m the person who has made you the socks and the sweater. I hope you’ll find them useful and warm. The rationing has made it difficult to get a hold of yarn and I decided to unwind an old sweater of my father’s. I know he would much rather it be used by you.

I know our Navy must need as much as our Army, but if you have no use for two pairs of socks, perhaps you can give the second pair to a friend. I know the endless walking that the Army does tears the garments rather quickly, but two pairs might have been too much. I couldn’t help myself, when they said that the packages will be delivered to people who rarely, if ever, receive mail. I wanted you to know that there are people who think of you back home.

The candies are made in London and remind me of my childhood. I hope it brings back pleasant memories for you, as well.

I don’t know if people actually spray their letters with perfume, but I read it in a book once, and I thought it might lift your spirits. Pass it along and let the boys sniff it like a pair of used knickers, for all I care.

Write, if it would please you. I would love to hear if the clothes have come to use, and make sure that you’re safe. I will pray for your safe return and a quick end to the war.

Most love.

Tom flips the letter to find a name and an address.

“Mate, you got paper and a pen?”

#world on fire #world on fire bbc #wof bbc #tom bennett #tom bennett x reader #letters from home

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aleksa-sims · 11 months ago

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Simself Story

CW: addiction, pregnancy, cheating, divorce

I told him... 😢🤦‍♀️

As the sun slowly rose after we talked all night about what Daniel has experienced the last 4 months, it was my turn, to tell him what I did, while he was gone...

What I can say? 😞... He was devastated. It wasn’t really my pregnancy or the fact that I get a baby by someone else, what has made him so upset, but rather the... circumstances that led to it and how it all came about. All our probs were caused by that damn attack/assault on us, 8 months ago. This thing has traumatized us. We both had difficulty processing it.

My parents told him I was dating Nico. The day he came back, he talked to them. He asked questions. And now, D. wanted to know from me, why I even met Nico? Did I call him? Or he me? How did we get there? Well, the stranger I met online... 🤦‍♀️

Daniel: He did it all on purpose! He pretended to be a stranger playing Sims with you. I mean how sick is that?... Did you know it was him? Did you lie to me? Be honest!

Me: No, I swear I didn't know!!! You know the whole story, I showed you everything he texted me. And he didn’t plan on breaking us up. He never meant to see me, he knew I loved you and we were married. He even helped me make up with you. It wasn’t until weeks after you left, that Nico started giving me more and more clues about his true identity. Listen D., he tried to distract me. I was always sad. I was looking for you everywhere with Alex. I was devastated! And I also relapsed, really bad, I fucked up sm. 🤦‍♀️😞

Daniel: You want to divorce me. Everything breaks dwon.... This is worse than the shit my crazy mother did to me. You and me... that wasn’t planned to end this way! It should never end!

Me: I'm so sorry. I don’t want it to end either. That’s why I married you, I love you, but-...... how’s this gonna work?

Daniel: You love him, not me! Otherwise, you’d just stay here. But you decided to divorce me and start a new life with him. So go! Go to him!..... What the fuck are you waiting for?

Me: No, I’m not leaving. I can’t leave you alone now. I’ll stay with you, as long as you need me.

Daniel: Damn, stay away from me!!.... Leave me alone, or I might say something I don’t want.

I couldn’t leave him alone. So I just stood aside somewhere in a corner, looking down, while Daniel left the living room. I touched my belly. I apologized to my Baby for the hatred I felt for myself at that moment. I was disgusted with myself. I resented myself for constantly repeating the same, damn mistakes. I never wanted to hurt Daniel!! He deserved me to stay with him and live our fucking lives the way it used to be. I have to find a solution!

Half an hour later, I went over to Daniel to look after him. And.....huh? Is Daniel cuddling his old teddy bear??? 🤨😄

Me: Daniel?..You ok?... You... need a huggie? 😳😬

Daniel: Nah, I just don't wanna see you. And why's that old dust catcher here? He also smells like you.

Me: I found him at your house the last time we were there. Your sister said it was yours once. And the other day when I was home, I found him in my closet. I gave him a little makeover. I cleand him and put some of my perfume on him. And yea, he's cute I wanted to keep him.

Daniel: I hate that teddy bear. He disappointed me when I was 7, just like you now. 😒

Me: Um... that's just a toy, Daniel. How can a teddy bear disappoint you? 🤨

Daniel: I got him when I was five. My crazy mother kept locking me in the closet as you know. He was my bud, who was allowed to accompany me. And whenever I was alone in our damn house, I was less afraid, bcs he was there too. But on my 7th birthday I found out who gave me that teddy bear. It was one of those damn witches my mother met at her fucking clut-parties. That woman also told me my teddy bear was not a boy as I thought, it was a girl! She showed me the label. And well, at 7 I could read. The label said, "Susi the bear." I was totally disappointed. He wasn’t my friend anymor, just a fucking traitor! A damn witch, Susi, like one of my mothers odd followers. 😠

Me: Sorry. I didn’t know, I’m gonna put him away. 😞

Daniel: Take it with you! Maybe your soccer player's gonna be happy about it. Kind of like a trophy for him. He’s an athlete, he should like that. 🤷‍♂️

Me: I’ll save your old teddy bear for my Baby. I thought one day, we could give it to our own baby, but if I had only guessed, I would be pregnant by someone else.... I-...agh, Daniel. I'm so sorry. I wish it was.................... otherwise. 😢I could stay with you, but what should I say to Nico? I can’t hurt him, and I don’t want to hurt you either. Really not! But I’ll find a solution. I won’t let you down.

Daniel: I don’t want....your solution. I want my girl to myself. I'm not gonna share you with him. I ain't like Philip, damn it! So just go!

I went out to our roof. I wanted to take Daniel’s laundry off the cloth-line. I wanted to help him and be there for him. But Daniel was annoyed.

Daniel: Hey! Don't you hear?... What are you still doing here?

Me: I wanna be there for you. I’m just helping you.

Daniel: I don’t need you as a cleaning lady or maid! I need my... wife!

Me: I’m not going! This is my home too!

Daniel: Fine! I’ll give you an hour. If you’re still there, I’ll lock the door. Then, you really have to stay here,.... overnight! I won’t unlock the door until tomorrow.🤨

Me: I have a key, you smart guy. 😒

Daniel: Not anymore, know-it-all. 🤨 Besides, I’m stronger than you.

Me: You’re gonna handcuff me?

Daniel: The clock's ticking. One hour! Decide!

Previous/Next

#ts4 #sims 4 #sims 4 story #myrlgameplay #rl story #cw divorce #cw pregnancy

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halloeverynyan · 6 months ago

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"10 things i like about you"

whoa new fic but with the art pres x science pres? yippee

warning im pretty shit at formal texting or talk so what you see here is just me randomly putting fancy words lmao

another warning it's shit so expect some mistakes and grammars HAHAHHAHAHAHA

summary: 10 things i like about tsuburaya geiju.

10 things i like about tsuburaya geiju.

hmm how shall i say this?

although we barely have any communication due to busy times, but the times where he makes me feel comfortable and warm around him... i do like him and see him as a friend.

but what are some ten things i like about geiju? that's the question mana and eiko asked me.

let's see...

1.) his talent of art.

i do admire his talent of art, and it just makes me have similar ideas, but well... i do asked his consent.

2.) his freckles.

don't get me wrong! i like his freckles, they remind me of strawberries. i meant that as a compliment!

3.) his care for his brother.

shoku tsuburaya right? i question myself why geiju chose the surname tsuka, but i don't want to ask him. although i do appreciate how geiju cares for shoku whenever his parents are at work, sometimes i always wanted to ask him if he needs help.

4.) his introvertness.

while i do tend to talk alot and stuff about my uh... interests and hobbies, geiju isn't like the other students i suppose, no offense to the other students, but he just listens and nods, which i do appreciate it.

5.) his smile.

i've never seen geiju smile, but shoku did told him that one time he smiled it was during his birthday. i've always wondered how he never smiles, but i suppose that's just his preference.

6.) his laugh.

hmm, i barely see him laugh, but i do remember how he chuckled when i begged boru to just give me the paint for a school project, i will never forget how sweet but soft geiju's chuckle is.

7.) his glasses.

his glasses are cute, don't know why almost everyone hates it. if anything, i suppose i find it beautiful on him.

8.) he's the only person who only communicates with me.

i can understand his reasoning to not like interacting or communicating with the students, but i still wonder why he just went up to me and talk to me with such small words. ahh— i meant in a curious way not in a offensive way!

9.) his scent.

NOT IN A CREEPY WAY! everytime i went up to him i always smell this one apple scent, i've always thought it was from the perfume or the cologne but knowing there's maybe no apple scented perfumes, i mostly thought he used a cologne.

10.) him, his comfort.

he makes me... warm, the way he speaks, the way he touches my hand... geiju makes me warm, and comfortable. it's the first time i've ever felt comfortable with a human being, let alone the president of the art club... but, i quite like it, no— i like it, just genuinely. maybe romantically? i barely show any true romantic emotions to anyone but... him.

URGH THEM I LOVE THEM AHHHHHH 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

#yandere simulator #kaga kusha #geiju tsuka #geiju tsuburaya #YAOI‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️#Spotify

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den-ai-d · 1 year ago

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Ooof...a decade on this site eh?

Oh no, story time incoming!

10 years and yeah, so much has happened already. Originally, I made this blog back when I was in high school as a place to post my drawings; back then, it was all just pencil drawings on paper. Looking at them now...well it was obvious I still had a long way ahead of me LOL. And to think some people assume that everyone skilled enough in art must have had some innate talent for it. CLEARLY, they don't know what they're talking about because I was terrible at it early on!

But I mean, I didn't really think that of my art, did I?

No. In fact, I'm pretty sure that kid me was very much impressed with his own works. See, that child had a very bloated ego and a high opinion of himself. You should ask his poor friends; I'm sure they'd agree that the bugger could take a few lessons on humility with how he'd be sharing all of his silly sketches to them and pontificating on and on about how nice he thinks they are. Yeah, I was an insufferable kid.

But I do think that overinflated ego of mine turned out beneficial for my growth as an artist because without it—without my love for my own art—I wouldn't have stuck to it.

And stuck to it I did.

Went to college soon after that and took a program majoring in biology. Not much of a surprising choice since I've always liked the sciences and figured it would later on give way to a stable career; funnily enough, while I was very passionate about making art, I never thought it would be a profitable source of income. But that didn't mean I'd stop doing it on my free time though! Actually, this was when I got myself my first tablet! And what better way to start my digital drawing experience than to buy a FUCKING EXPENSIVE cintiq!!! With the extra motivation coming from the monetary pressure of such a purchase, you bet your ass I used the hell out of that thing. I was so intent on making use of it that—would you look at that—I still use it to this day! (Wow, they really made those old wacom tablets to last, didn't they?)

Obviously, college work ended up taking a lot of my time so I couldn't really draw as much as I did a few years ago. There were even times when I could only make one painting throughout a whole month; a far cry to my previous output. But even so, I never wavered in thinking that making art—being an artist—was something that was part of my identity; it was something that I always will come back to, no matter how much busy I got contending with course work.

And speaking of which, fuck that! Got my first honest-to-goodness mental breakdown because of all the studying I was doing at one point. See, I'm the type of student that likes getting good grades because BIG NUMBERS so I made it a point to be studious. To the point of insanity, apparently.

Anyway, I got better eventually and it all turned out nice. Even snagged all the awards I could've gotten for my thesis by the end of it! Yes, I am bragging. I deserve it, thank you very much! (For anyone curious, it was a study about plant pigments and using them in solar cells).

After that debacle, I found myself whisked into Adulthood which meant I finally had to find a job. Guess I was lucky since I didn't really have much of a hard experience searching for one. Got accepted into a cosmetics company for a lab position. Hmm, in hindsight, I think they just wanted a fresh graduate who wouldn't demand a high salary and that was me so I got in pretty easily. And honestly, the work was AWESOME. My job ended up with me coming up with formulas for new products. I got to make lotions, shampoos, soaps (ugh, I hated that one), perfumes, toners, balms, scented candles, and—oddly enough that one time—glue! It was a wonderful experience for me since it blended my interest in science and art with how it required me to think of creative ways of applying technical solutions in order to make products that needed to look, feel, smell, and perform a certain way.

As a bonus, I even got to make stuff for myself! I was particularly fond of making creams with menthol. The soothing chill on the skin is just so nice!

It wasn't all good though. I mean the menthol was fine and dandy, I assure you, but even if I was enjoying myself with the work, it just so happens that it just wasn't giving me enough money to provide for the family. Also, there was that one time I splashed chili oil on my eye. A very eye-opening and spicy turn of events to be sure.

With the bills stressing the hell out of me, I then thought to myself: if only I had a marketable skill that I could use in my off time as a way of engaging with a hobby whilst earning money.

Yup, I started my singing career!

LOL no. I opened art commissions for the first time!

It was a very scary experience, mind you. I don't consider myself a social butterfly and the prospect of talking with other people in a transactional context was a big reason why I haven't even considered doing it all this time. Turns out being poor and running out of money outweighed such concerns. Also, my keeping up with art and posting them online all these years seemed to have payed off well; my twitter having then recently crossed over a thousand followers which meant I had a decent pool of potential clients!

And so I bumbled through my first few commissions trying to appear professional and all put together in front of my clients while consistently shitting myself on the inside. Just like all well-functioning adults!

It was October last year when I started. I figured that I wouldn't have much in way of commissioners—what with being new to the business—and that was fine since I didn't have much time to put on them anyways since I did still had to go to work on my day job. What mattered was that it gave me enough of a financial buffer so that I didn't have to worry too much about going under.

This continued to the turn of the year where I was able to juggle both my job and doing commission without much of a hassle. In fact, I noticed that people were actually really interested in getting commissions from me. So much that at one point...I actually made more money in a month than what I would've with my monthly salary! At that point, it was so over! Like, I originally was planning to at least observe how things went within this year and then decide after if I would just keep it as a side gig or go full-time with art. Turns out I was much more impulsive than I expected.

It was on a bright sunny February morning (no cinematic storm clouds in sight, unfortunately) that I decided on a lark to approach my boss at work and tell them that yup, no joke, I was gonna be leaving. I handed my resignation letter a few days later.

I would've liked to say that it was a tearful goodbye with my cherished co-workers whom I've spent the last five years of my life with but...COME ON, I barely talked with those people! Instead, it was a lukewarm farewell between people who just happened to work in proximity to each other. Eh, like I said, I wasn't much of a social butterfly and no one really made an effort to get to know me so oh well. MOVING ON!

Actually, I couldn't just up and leave because there are laws around these kinds of things so I worked there for another month but all that was a blur. Soon enough, I was officially unemployed!

So like I mentioned earlier, I full on did not expect doing art as something that would bring in much in way of income. My parents too thought the same. They said that yeah, art was a good hobby but as job? Let's be serious here! Well, turns out we were wrong all this time. With me fully dedicated to commission work, I was able to take on a larger volume of clients. Not as many as some of you go for (I'm looking at you, people who take ten or more commissions per batch, you monsters!) but enough that I was actually making a stable living! And yeah, WAY more than my now previous job. What an absolute shock to everyone involved; me most of all.

Now it's almost the end of the year, my plans having all but shattered into tiny pieces. Tiny pieces that scatter with the wind as I look back on the past ten years that has led me to where I am today. A lot of time has passed. I graduated high school, college, then got a job. Then graduated from that too. Certain people have come and gone. Some more permanent than others. I've lost friends and made new ones. Tumblr got fucked. Twitter got fucked. The world stopped for two years. For some, it's still stuck in those two years. I made glue in a lab. Almost lost an eye in a lab. I bought chips with my very own money for the first time. I loved people. Hated them too. Things have happened. Things have changed.

I certainly am very different from that kid who was having troubles fitting in with others from his class, what with being bullied and suffering through a particularly angsty teenage (oh my god I was CRINGE). A kid who often sought drawing as an escape to all of those terrible things out of his control.

I guess I'm happy I can still relate to that kid.

#den thoughts #10 year tumblrversary #tumblr milestone #omg an essay #what the hell #it's 5 in the morning #I wrote this for two hours #me and my pretentious ass #ugh #I'm going to bed

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