#i also have no clue if the shadow placement is correct

[izzieedraws]

space vogue ft. rakun

[bokettochild]

For the requests if you're game?

Four and Warriors dynamic since we don't see it much?

Also you're awesome and absolutely don't have to do this if you don't want haha

So, words aren't nice to me today, and your prompt really helped with that. I'm sorry I didn't get to it sooner! But I'm glad I did it today. The verb tenses are a bit off and all over, but I really like the pretense.

For context, this is something that used to happen with me and my dad when he was in pain. I have no clue why it works, but it does somehow? For him anyway. Anyway, as I am the shorty of my family, I figured Four could take my place here :)

“Four, how tall are you?”

Don’t kill him. Green whispered, whether to himself or to his brothers none of them knew.

Why would he even need to know that? The grouchier voice in his head huffed out as hazel eyes shot up to meet the captain’s blue.

Was that particularly necessary? Vio groaned, and if he’d had a physical form the color in question would likely have just flopped over tiredly.

“Four foot four.” They answered curtly, turning their gaze back down to the sword in their hand as they continued to work over its length.

Warriors chuffed out a strangled sort of noise across from them, whether it be from pain, surprise or laughter they didn’t know, and as long as the captain didn’t push, they’d give him a little grace. The poor man was in enough pain as it was, and it really would be a shame to have him writhing on the ground if they kicked him in some... painful places.

“Really?” The man wheezed. “Please tell me you’re joking?”

They rolled their eyes.

Permission to kick him in the nuts?

One minute, let me think about it.

Pities sakes you two, we are not kicking the captain! Vio scolded. We’ll dye his hair while he sleeps or sew a patch on his tunic while he walks or something, not...oy vey.

“I’m four-foot-five.” They corrected aloud. “Happy?”

Sharp eyes met the captain’s again, four voices fighting over whether to cause harm or not. “Huh.”

Guys, look at him! Red huffed. He’s not even able to sit up straight! Give him a break, this one time?

Agreement rang in their mind. Wars was in pretty awful shape. The man had pulled his back while trying to heft a wounded Twilight through the forest the other day, and while he’d insisted the entire time that he had it handled, he’d come to regret it the next day when he woke up nearly too sore to move. They all teased Time about being an Old Man, and it was well known that Legend’s arthritis gave him trouble on some days, but neither the vet not their leader had ever moved as slowly as the captain this morning when they’d been on the road, and Time had had to call an early halt simply because Wars was clearly in so much pain.

The man currently lay on his stomach on the ground at the edge of camp, trying to stretch out his strained back and staring as Four with an odd look in his eyes. “Could you do me a favor?”

Could you not mock our height?

I thought we liked our height?

We do, but we don’t need to be teased for it!!!

“What do you need?” They eventually settled on, setting their sword aside and giving the captain their full attention.

“Stand on my back.” Warriors answered.

They blinked, startled. Once, twice, thrice, four times at the man. “Pardon?”

“Stand on my back.” Warriors repeated himself, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“But-”

Is he bonkers? Captain, we are not cracking your spine to put you out of your misery? Blue frowned, confused.

We’d hurt him doing that, why would he even ask?

This is Warriors, he’s not known for having all the lights on a good day.

“Aren’t you in pain?” Red managed to take the forefront, worry spilling into his voice as he stared down at where the captain lay on the ground.

The man smiled, shaking his head slightly only to wince and instead offer one of his charming smiles. “It helps. Just trust me, ‘kay?”

And what were they supposed to do? Even Legend had stepped up to offer help with the pain this afternoon, not that it would do much good for Warriors’ specific problem, but it had earned the vet a warm chuckle and a head ruffle, resulting in much squawking and insults as the vet protested the action. Wild had searched his slate for supplies to make a cure, and Time had called a halt for the day’s travels entirely. Sky had even offered what little help he could provide, but while offers of aid had come from everywhere, there hadn’t been anything that had worked.

But Wars was claiming that actively stepping on the injury would help it, and as absurd as it sounded, the captain seemed utterly confident in it, eyes almost pleading as they shifted where they sat.

“It won’t, I don’t know, mess up your back at all? Are you sure-”

“Goddesses, Four! It’ll be fine.” The captain huffed desperately, just do it, please?”

Now they understood why Warriors could charm discounts and special deals out of merchants and inn-keepers, his royal blue eyes looked utterly pitiful and almost tearful as they stared up at them, pleading and wide. The effect was ruined though when Wars added a tiny little pout that sent Vio reeling with laughter as Blue and Green stifled their own, Red cooing softly in their head.

“Alright.” The laughter of three of the four colors spilled over in a light chuckle as the smithy pulled themselves to their feet, stepping over hesitantly and setting one foot on Warriors’ stretched out back.

“Go on.” Wars prompted, chuckling fondly. “It won’t hurt me, I’ll tell you if it does, okay?”

That didn’t help at all. They weren’t big, they knew that, but they weren’t as slight as they looked, they were smithies after all, and they were a solid little brick of muscle mass. Warriors may be certain it would be okay, but they sure weren’t.

“Four, I’m literally begging you. Step on me.”

The smithy’s nose wrinkled and they pulled back. “That is incredibly weird sounding.”

“Step.” Warriors ordered.

“This is so weird!” A nervous laugh fell from their lips. “How does this even help?”

“Just do it!” The captain groaned. “It helps, I promise. I can’t explain it, but it does.”

One tentative foot pressed against the captain’s back again, only for the smithy to back off, earning a huff in annoyance from the captain. “Four-”

“Let me take my boots off first.” They murmured, shivering off the awkward feeling that came from stepping on of their brothers. But they could only avoid Wars’ pleading gaze for so long and once their shoes are properly put to the side, they had no valid excuse to not ‘help’ the man.

How does this even help him?

Do we care? We have an excuse to step on him!

Vio, I think you spent too much time around Shadow. Stepping on people isn’t funny.

It’s funny if it’s Warriors. Vio sounded particularly satisfied with himself at the moment, and the others could only sigh at that, finally giving in to the captain's request as Vio pushed the body forwards until they are standing, fully, on Warriors’ back.

“Oh, yes, thank you.” The captain’s voice comes out in a relieved sigh. “A bit lower if you could- that's the- yes, right there. Oh gosh.” Blonde hair met the dirt as their resident “pretty boy” let his face fall to rest on the ground. A satisfied sigh escaping him, albeit muffled by the earth. “That is so much better. Thank you, Four.”

“How does this help?” They frowned, staring down at where the man spread out on the ground, utterly limp and incredibly boney under their feet.

“No clue.” Comes the muffled reply, no attempt made to explain as the captain continued to let himself melt into the earth. “But it always works like a charm, so I don’t question it.”

Always?

“Who do you usually have step on you?” They ask, standing awkwardly on a boney spine any trying their hardest to keep their balance so they don’t slip and tumble onto Warriors’ head and give him a concussion on top of everything.

“My kids.” Comes the easy reply, as if the words don’t send them reeling enough that they almost do fall. “Mask jumped on top of e once to try and wake me up. I wasn’t asleep, but it was a tough battle the day before. Come to find out having a smallish person stand on you does wonders! My younger siblings used to do it too, but then they all hit growth-spurts.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.” They chuckled easily, finding a comfortable placement for their feet as Warriors’ back rises and falls with soft laughter.

“Believe it or not,” The captain rumbles, the vibrations trailing up their legs and making them stifle a giggle. “I’m the short one in the family. The eldest, but the Hylia forsaken shortest.” There’s very nearly a pout in the man's voice and they failed to hold back their laughter as they look down at him.

”You’re the shortest?”

“To my eternal torment.” Comes the groaned reply, and all the colors can do in reaction is laugh.

Later, when the others finally look over and see what’s happening, there are shouts and concerned looks from the heroes when they see their shortest standing on the previously sore and aching back of their tallest, but for now, Four gets to tease the captain for being short; something they never thought would ever happen.

Vio cackled madly in the background the whole time, leaving his brothers concerned after the first ten minutes when the color’s mirth failed to fade.

[scribomaniac]

Something Wicca This Way Comes Ch 15

Left punch, left kick. Right punch. Right punch again. Double kick.

Killian absorbed blow after blow as he held the punching bag still for Emma. She had good form, though that didn’t surprise him. What did surprise him was how often she used her legs to attack. He’d offered to show her a few boxing moves earlier that day and she’d accepted with only a bit of hesitation, which was an improvement in Killian’s opinion. He wasn’t sure why he’d suggested boxing. Liam had been busy in the kitchen, experimenting with some potions, and Will was reviewing the Book of Shadows in the attic, searching for any clues that would help Emma defeat the Source.

Emma had made great strides when it came to controlling her magic, so perhaps it’d been a mixture of that and his own boredom. Or perhaps he thought he’d be able to teach her something new. Perhaps he’d imagined himself standing behind her, showing her how to stand and correcting the placement of her arms while she leaned into him. But of course he should have known that Emma knew how to box, or, more accurately, how to hit. Perhaps, he now imagined, they’d be able to spar one day.

Eyes flickering down to watch Emma lick her lips, Killian thought about the last kiss they shared. It had been quick and brutal but had started a fire in his veins that had taken hours to douse. She had said that it was a one time thing, but the glint that had been in her eyes said differently. He hoped that if he bided his time, if they took it slow, that spark might turn into something more. Into what, he couldn’t be certain. There was still much left unsaid, after all, but Killian would be a fool to deny he still had feelings for Emma. He wanted to explore those emotions more, wanted to explore them with Emma.

“Alright,” Killian called it after one especially vicious kick to the punching bag. “Let’s not over-do it, Swan. Time for a break.”

Emma looked like she wanted to argue, but instead shrugged her shoulders. “Fine. I’m going to check on Will—see if he’s found anything.”

“I’ll come with.”

Emma’s brows raised and she paused at the foot of the steps. “Oh, you don’t have to if you don’t want. I mean,” she looked back to the punching bag. “I know you wanted more time down here to yourself.”

Now it was Killian’s turn to raise a brow, but he just rose one as he asked, “Trying to get rid of me already?”

“No! I just mean,” she bit down on her lip and then shook her head, “never mind.”

Killian hummed, following Emma up the stairs. “I’d take your company over an old punching bag any day, Swan.” It’d been meant as a joke, but he could see the way Emma’s shoulders stiffened. He grimaced, wondering if he’d made her uncomfortable.

They ascended the rest of the stairs in an awkward silence, and Killian thought he’d never been so happy to see his younger brother than he did then. “Find anything, Will?”

He walked over to the Book of Shadows. Emma hung back by the door, keeping an eye on the Book as if she thought it’d try and attack her.

“Not yet,” Liam answered for him, walking into the attic just after them with a few vials of potions in his hands. He placed them over on a side table and then placed his hands on his hips. “I wonder if we can summon an upper-level demon up here. I’d like to give the new potions a whirl.”

“Not a great idea,” Emma said flatly.

Killian snorted. He looked up to catch her eye, but she quickly looked away. Trying not to feel too deflated, he placed his hand on the Book of Shadows to get a better look at the page Will had opened.

Without any warning, Killian’s breath left him and his mind was pulled into a premonition.

Will and Killian dragged Liam’s body through the attic’s entrance, his dead weight making it hard for them to walk. They laid him on the floor on the far side of the room, watching the door for their assailant. Liam’s face bore deep scratches, and his eyes fluttered as he tried to stay awake.

“Come on, Liam,” Killian patted his cheek while keeping him upright. “Come on, mate, you need to wake up.”

“Should we call Tink?” Will asked, not taking his eyes off the door.

Killian shook his head, “No, not yet. We can’t distract them—”

A great burst of fire appeared in the middle of their attic and a slender figure stepped out from its fiery mouth. A demon with oily, scaly skin stood before them. The smile on his face was one filled with glee and it filled Killian with a sick sense of dread.

Bringing his hands up like a magician, the demon, his voice high-pitched and shrill, asked, “What a day this has turned out to be, hmm? Now, who wants to die first?” He pointed a finger at the brothers, waving in between the three of them, “Eeny, meeny, miny—”

“Liam!” Killian yelled, shaking his brother hard enough to rattle his brain.

Eyes snapping open, Liam’s hands reached out and the demon exploded. The explosion was short lasting though, as the demon’s body began to reassemble, and a shrill laugh echoed throughout the room.

With a gasp, Killian returned to the present.

“What did you see?” Will asked, his eyes wide and his mouth tense.

Killian shook his head and looked over the Book of Shadows. “A demon attacking us.”

“What’d he look like?” Liam asked, sidling up next to his younger brother to look over his shoulder as Killian flipped through the pages.

“Like a crocodile.” Killian flipped page after page, but so far he was having no luck. He hated having to looks through the Book. It’s pages were so old and frail but there were so many of them too. He could never be sure if the thing he was looking for just wasn’t in the Book at all or if he’d accidentally skipped past it. Grinding his teeth, he silently begged one of his ancestors to guide him to the correct page. “He had scaly skin and yellow eyes.” His teeth were atrocious too, but he didn’t see the point in adding that bit of information. Out of his periphery, Killian could see Emma take hesitant a step closer. “He was powerful—I’d bet he worked directly under the Source.”

Emma stepped forward, then took another step back before asking, “A crocodile? Are you sure?”

Killian looked up, “Aye, you know him?”

She nodded slowly, “Yeah, only he doesn’t work for the Source. He is the Source. You just described Rumpelstiltskin.”

“Rumple-what?” Will asked.

“That’s the Source?” Killian’s jaw dropped. “Shit.”

“What else did you see?” Liam asked urgently, placing his hand on Killian’s shoulder to bring his attention back around.

Mouth turning dry, Killian thought about what he saw. “I saw—I saw him attacking us. Liam, you—you were bleeding and Will was,” brows furrowing, Killian shook the image away. “Let’s just say it wasn’t looking good for us.”

“What about me?” Emma asked, mouth drawn down into a severe frown.

Licking his lips, Killian shook his head again, “You weren’t there.”

Beside him, Liam stiffened. “What do you mean, she wasn’t there?”

“The vision wasn’t long, alright?” He looked around the room at everyone. “I don’t know any more than what I saw.”

Growling, Liam turned towards Emma, “I swear, if you betray us—”

“Oh, knock it off Liam!” Will stepped into Liam’s vision, obscuring Emma from his view. “You yelling at Emma isn’t helping anything. We need to figure out our next move. Is there anything in the Book that can help us?”

“I don’t—” a gust of wind knocked Killian’s hands away from the Book of Shadows. The pages flew of their own accord. Heaving a sigh of relief, Killian said a small “Thank you,” when the Book finally settled onto a page. “Who’s this?”

“Malcolm?” Liam read, confusion clear on his face. “That another name for the Source? He doesn’t look like a crocodile.”

“That’s not who I saw in my vision,” Killian murmured as he read the page. The illustration for him was of a young boy with dark blond hair and a wicked smile. There was hardly information written about him. But what it did say was interesting. “Also known as the Piper of Hamelin, Malcolm is an immortal creature who preys on the life force of children. No spell or potion could vanquish him and so he was trapped and hidden away by James Jones.”

“James Jones,” Emma quirked a brow, “who’s that?”

“Our great-great-something great-grandfather,” Will answered. “Do you think he’s the one who moved the pages? But why? What does Malcolm have to do with this?”

Killian stared at the drawing of Malcolm. The longer he looked, the more the boy’s smile seemed to taunt him. He could almost hear laughter, cruel and loud and not unlike the crow of a rooster, echoing in the back of his head. Killian had never wanted to punch a drawing before, but he found his fist curling tightly all the same.

“I’ve never heard of him before,” Emma said slowly, “but I think James wants us to talk to him. Anyone know where granddad stashed him?”

“It doesn’t say,” Liam frowned at the page, “and dad never told us anything about this.”

“Shocker,” Will snorted, then quickly looked away when Liam looked up to glare at him.

Liam hummed, but didn’t call Will out. Instead he said, “We’ll just have to ask him.”

Finally averting his gaze, Killian looked at Liam and then Will. Then, with a smile he turned onto Emma, he said, “It’s time for a séance.”

Like a well-oiled machine, the Charmed Ones set about to gather up their supplies. Killian grabbed the candles, Liam opened the Book to the proper page, and Will grabbed a stick of sage. Once everything was lit and ready to go, Liam read, “Hear these words, hear our cry, spirit from the other side. Come to us, we summon thee, cross now the great divide.”

Within the circle of candles Killian had prepared, a ball of light emerged, and then in a flash, a man bearing a striking resemblance to Killian stood before them. His hair was longer and wavier, he had an impressive mustache, and there was a hook where his left hand should be, but besides all that Killian found a near perfect reflection staring back at him.

“It’s about time you summoned me,” James said, crossing his arms and glowering at his descendants as if they’d just stolen something precious from him.

“I’m sorry,” Emma raised her hands, at a loss, “who are you?”

“I’m your salvation, me’dear. The way you lot are heading you’ll be dead at the Source’s hands in a fortnight.”

Will looked helplessly at Killian, “A fortnight?”

“Two weeks.”

“Aye,” James nodded solemnly, “even with your precious Savior, you won’t be able to do much against Rumpelstiltskin without his dagger.”

“Dagger?” Emma asked, her voice sharp. “What dagger?”

“I don’t know too much about it, just from what I’ve heard whispered from other spirits, ye’see?” James stroked the edge of his mustache. “But I know that without it your cause is hopeless.”

Killian frowned, wondering how in the world this dagger was supposed to help with anything, and why they’d never heard of it before. “If this dagger is so important, wouldn’t the Source keep it locked away safe in the Underworld.”

“Of course not, you idiot boy!” James practically spat.

Emma hummed in agreement, “If it’s really that important then Rumpelstiltskin would want it as far away from the Underworld as possible.” Noticing the confused glances aimed her way, she shrugged, “Being the most powerful puts a target on your back. There’s always someone looking to take the throne.”

“So where would he hide it?” Liam asked. “Could we scry for it?”

James sighed heavily, “What did I do to deserve such half-witted grandsons.”

“Hey!” Will protested.

“It’ll be heavily guarded,” Emma said, ignoring the insults being thrown around. “The Source wouldn’t trust demons to watch over it, but he’d use enchantments.”

“The only creature that knows where the bloody thing is, and what’s protecting it, is Malcolm.” James jerked his chin towards the Book of Shadows.

Emma shook her head, “No, that doesn’t make sense.” She looked at Killian. “Rumpelstiltskin would never trust anyone with that information, why would—” she shook her head before continuing, “and I’ve never heard of a demon named Malcolm. Why do you think he’d know anything about this?”

James looked down his nose at Emma, surveying her. Killian didn’t like the way he seemed to be sizing her up, as if he might consider her an enemy. “I wonder,” James eventually responded, his voice a slow drawl, “perhaps you knew him by his moniker. Does the name Pan mean anything to you?”

Emma’s skin turned pale and her jaw fell open. James nodded. “Thought that might do it.”

“What?” Will looked back and forth between Emma and James. “What does that mean? Who is he?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Emma said roughly. Not taking her eyes off James, she asked, “Where is he?”

“I banished him to another dimension, one where he couldn’t harm innocents any longer. You’ll need to go there to speak with him, but beware!” His large blue eyes bore into the Charmed Ones, making Killian’s back straighten. “Pan is not to be trifled with. Do not accept anything offered from him, do not engage in his games, and do not listen to any of his lies. Get in, get the information, and get out.”

Killian gulped, “Is that all?” When James turned to glare at him, he looked away.

Liam, always there to save the day, intercepted by asking, “So where is this dimension and how do we visit it?”

With a wave of his arm the Book of Shadows once again came to life. Killian walked over and saw the intricate spell written. “Astral projection?”

“Aye, and at least one of ye will need to stay behind to ensure you find your way back. It’s easy enough to get lost amongst the stars and you don’t want to overshoot it.”

Liam joined Killian, looking at what they’d need to do for the spell. “We’ll need to name of the dimension. What’s it called?”

“Never Land.”

[jmsebastian]

Nitpickery: QTE Button Prompts

Castlevania: Lords of Shadow is far from perfect. Even so, it’s a game that I’ve played and replayed many times for the reason that it’s a satisfying combat action title. Its flaws tend to be the mildly irritating kind, and thus can be ignored easily enough, especially on multiple playthroughs. There is one aspect of the game, however, which does significantly impact my enjoyment of the game, and that is how it uses button prompts for the quick time events.

For the record, I don’t think quick time events are a particularly egregious offense. When you’re going for a particularly cinematic sequence that would otherwise be impossible given the camera’s normal operation, or if you build in quirky gimmicks into the combat, they can be engaging. No matter you implement them, the trick to pulling them off successfully rests in the consistency of their presentation. Lords of Shadow, unfortunately, completely misses the mark on this front in two very specific ways.

The first issue and biggest issue is the element of randomness to the button prompts. I’ll use the large lycan enemies for my example because I think they demonstrate this most clearly. When you hit a lycan enough times to stun them, they glow gold, letting you know that you can grab them to finish them off. There are two quick time events that you must complete in order to finish them off cleanly. First, you have to press any button once a larger circle shrinks down inside a smaller circle. I never really minded these because it doesn’t matter what button you push, so long as you push something with the correct number of frames. The second part is that you have to mash a particular face button once Gabriel Belmont places his foot on the lycan’s face. The button you need to mash simply depends upon which one the game wants to present to you for that particular sequence.

Circle, this time.

Square, this time, in the same fight.

There is only one reason to use different button prompts to perform the same action, and that is to punish players for not paying close enough attention. This should never be the goal of an action game that explicitly tells you what buttons to press and when. The controller, in the case of Lords of Shadow, is the apparatus through which the player controls Gabriel Belmont. It is essentially an analog for Gabriel’s body. In order for it to work that way, there have to be certain rules to its use. Pressing a button or combination of buttons has to perform a specific action and do so consistently so that the player can understand what they do and control the character successfully. If we go back to Gabriel’s foot on the lycan’s face, no matter how many lycans you grab and do this to, it is inherently the same action. Why, then, do I sometimes have to press A or Cross to do this, and sometimes Y or Circle? You have to do it that way because the developers decided the QTEs should be more like obstacles than methods to directly control Gabriel, sending mixed signals to the player about what the controller’s role in the game actually is.

While it might seem like a minor annoyance to some, I actually think using QTEs in this way subtly undermines the faith that players put in the game overall. I found myself regularly pressing the wrong buttons during normal combat, jumping when I meant to slash, or grabbing when I meant to block, because I was constantly being told by the random button prompts that there was no correlation between the buttons I was pressing and the action I was performing. Lords of Shadow is not the only game that takes this approach, though. You see it in Bayonetta as well, and it’s no less hostile to players there, either.

Bayonetta does have one major leg up on Lords of Shadow’s implementation, though, and that is in the graphical representation of the prompt. Bayonetta presents the buttons within the context of the controller itself. Rather than just an isolated graphic of the button that Lords of Shadow provides, you get a circle with the buttons that you need to press in the positions they would be on your controller. This is a small detail but it helps immensely. At that point, I don’t really even have to recognize the buttons, themselves, rather just the placement. Given that you likely aren’t looking at your controller very often while playing, its small touches like this that can alleviate a problem. Lords of Shadow does go halfway here, and puts the button prompt in a place on the screen that mimics where it would be on the controller, but the button graphic is in complete isolation. Without the controller context, it doesn’t do near enough to help the player identify the button quickly.

I’ll also mention that this problem is more pronounced for me on the Xbox 360 and PC version of Lords of Shadow. When Playing on the PlayStation 3, I found myself confusing buttons less often. I’m not sure if that’s because I just play more games on Sony consoles or what. I thought it might be due to Microsoft and Sega using one letter configuration and Nintendo using another, but I play plenty of Japanese games on PlayStation platforms that swap the confirm and cancel commands between the Cross and Circle buttons. Maybe I’m just illiterate.

Whether or not this kind of issue is a nitpick or not really depends on the person. For me, I think it definitely ventures into fundamental problem territory due to the erosion of trust between the game and the player. However, that very well may be an issue with me and not a more widespread problem. Of course, how you feel about it also probably largely has to do with how you feel about QTEs more generally. I’ve long felt that the line between QTE and just reacting to what’s happening in the game is very thin. Games like Demon’s Souls proved that enemies didn’t even have to flash a certain color or do anything outside their standard animations to clue players in to what they were about to do and how to react.

Meanwhile, Arkham Asylum used specific button prompts and consistent indicators above enemies to let you know when to block and dodge attacks or perform specific moves. Even From Software themselves, danced dangerously close to QTE territory with its warning messages that flash on screen in Sekiro, which surprised me considering how they had relied solely on animations to telegraph enemy behavior in most of their games. But then I remembered From Software also made Ninja Blade, maybe the QTEist game of them all, so I imagine they’ll stick around in some capacity for quite a while yet. If they do, hopefully they learn from the games that did them poorly so that they can at least not hinder the player’s progress for no good reason.

[the-mira-life-project-mtf]

My MtF~H.R.T. -- My New Family

THE END IS NEAR...

     I once dreamed of a time when I was caught in-between two ordeals:

     Love for the family that raised you, or love for the family that loved you.

     I wanted both, but was denied as the family that raised me ensnared me in my home whereas the family that loved me, changed me into someone new. This dream came again-and-again, stronger and stronger, vivid and warning me that it would happen after a terrible snow fell on the ground. Only problem, we were in a warming period and snow was pretty much non-existent! Then, like fate, the weather changed and a storm dumped over 2 feet of snow in one night...snow that the Puget Sound has never seen before. It was a once in the thousand-year event!

     My dream warned that once the snow fell, I would become near-death sick, and unable to leave...I would depend on the family that loved me to heal me and care for me...and this would begin the transformation. And sure enough, my lungs seized, my mucus turned green and I was fighting pneumonia with no access to antibiotics. My family, all over them, worked diligently to help clear the mucus from my lungs as we were trapped over a week in our home.

     I would lay there as the white icy snow fell outside my window as I thought to myself ‘My God...it is actually happening! I am living the part in my dream!’ I flipped through the pages as I looked for more clues of what would happen. The dream warned that I would have to face the end. The divide as I faded from my family and became someone new. The man that came for a week stay, would leave as a woman, a daughter of the family. It stated that I would attend their wedding, become part of the family and then...I would become part of the family, forever.

     Mira Carlene Messinger was my new name. The shadows of David remained, rekindled by friends who stopped by, but they did not disturb the fabric of reality as they all came to accept me as a transgender female. I no longer looked the same...it was a painful transformation...but in the end, I appeared younger and a reflection of the daughter that saved my life.

     Not only had my body changed. Mentally, I would begin to change. No longer longing for the family I left behind. My focus would be on the family I have.

     Unconditional love is a powerful vice!

THE TALKS CONTINUE...

     Back in May of 2018; the biggest doubt I faced with being transgender was that I was going to go through this all alone. That is why I created this blog, to voice my thoughts that I would have voiced with my family. There was fear of being discovered and the consequences that would befall my coming out. However, the Lord has blessed me with a new family, who loves me for who I am, even if it is Mira and not David.

     As I was writing this blog, Michelle message me with some exciting news that I have yet to consider.

Michelle: How was your day?

Mira: Not too bad, had garbage to burn and cleaning the garage from the Christmas light mess. Day started with driving my grandmother around, and almost fell asleep at the wheel. I remember saying to her, ‘I don’t understand, this is a new tank, but I feel nothing!’ as I pulled at the cord and found that I shut my oxygen cord in the door! Lol! Even with this dilemma, still had to drive! Otherwise, a nice day, how has yours been?

Michelle: Felt exhausted today, not exactly sure why. Was so happy to get home. Made some dinner and now just laying in bed watching some TV with Mitch.

Mira: I am looking forward to moving out that way...been gathering my belongings to bring in small waves. Tools, personal items, lights, books...things I don’t want to lose. I have been considering the process of moving and how to adjust...and to be honest, I look forward to it!

Michelle: Did you want the bookshelf in the bedroom for your books? If not let me know and we can take it out.

Mira: It is the cloudy weather that makes people exhausted! I tried to sit and work on my stories and reflection on the future...did not get far as work always finds me!

Michelle: I also have an extra nightstand in Logan's Room to put on the bedside that has 2 drawers in it. And then the closet has shelves for we can always figure something out for a dresser if need be.

If you wanna put tools in the barn, you can or anything like tools that you would use on a regular basis we have the cabinet in the old laundry room downstairs that we could use. I also want to clean out the cabinet in the bathroom so you can put toiletries and such and that bathroom.

Mira: I like that bookshelf and also wish to keep Amanda’s shelf on the bottom shelf (if that is okay with Mitch).

One moment to consider...I have not considered room design yet.

Michelle: You just let me know what you want moved out and what you want to stay and will make it work.

Mira: A dresser would be nice, have not had one of those in 15 years!

Michelle: Mitch is asking if you've told anybody yet?

Mira: No, I have not said a word about moving, waiting till our trip to the ocean is through, so I can focus on digging clams. It is a probability, but I fear that information could lead to terrible conflict...reason why I am gathering my supplies just in case.

Michelle: So you know, I did have a conversation with Lexi. She is very excited for you to move in with us as she feels that you stay much healthier when you're in our home. I did let her know about the changes that you want to make in your life and she is very happy at the fact that you will be free with who you are and that we are able to help you through the process. She is so open minded so I knew that this would be her reaction.

Mira: That sounds wonderful! I did not know what Lexie’s thoughts were. She is a very accepting young lady.

Michelle: Well you have a house key, so feel free to drop off anything you need to, here. Or come here and rest in the middle of the day if you need to or whatever the case may be. Also we can create storage in the loft if you have items that are bigger that you don't wanna keep in your room. There is also a wardrobe with a drawer up there. Better answer, I will try to get to that closet this weekend so that you can have places to put things. I also have baskets that can go on the shelves to hold different things. As far as your medication, you could always keep that in the top of the cabinet in the bathroom.

Mira: Perfect! I keep all my meds and equipment on a shelf in my room and extras in a closet. I use to keep it in the bathroom when my grandfather was alive, but since his death, I am only allow to keep everything in my room or in the living room. It is nice I can store extra stuff in the loft...don’t have much, but I’ll bring things that are important to me and can be used to help the family.

As for converting my name and identity; still too dangerous to do that publicly I feel. Once things settle and I feel secure in my new life, then I’ll ask to convert my name. We’ll have that conversation, but I see it happening probably by summer or just after.

Thank you to all of you for being so willing to adopt me (if that is okay to use); I believe Lexie (is it Lexi or Lexie, I am uncertain) is correct, my health is so much better there. Unconditional love is a powerful medicine!

Michelle: It’s Lexie :) Yes it is. Love is the Way.

Mira: Perfect, been spelling it correctly! Certainly, love is the way...just took me a year or so to realize that! Thank you for always reaching out, I know you mentioned it last night and I wanted to thank you and Mitch...again, it is something I’ve never experienced...and I cherish it!

Michelle: I didn't get a chance to ask you last night, but wanted to know if you plan to go through a complete sex change through surgery? Also meant to tell you, when you get the date of your port being placed, I'd be happy to go with you if you want.

Mira: I had plans to do so...as I see my HRT physician this month; but it probably won’t happen as my health is too poor to go under General. But much of my discomfort is because of my anatomy. It is weird to explain. Also, I feel that it is a family decision too, so we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. / I’d be honored to have you come with me for my port placement...still waiting on the surgeon...I am shooting for sometime in May.

Michelle: 👍  I hope you have a good night tonight David and I hope you sleep . We'll see you tomorrow.

Mira: I wish both you and Mitch the same, Hope tomorrow brings renewed energy! I will see everyone tomorrow! Have a pleasant night! 💜

Michelle: 💞

PASSING THROUGH GETHSEMANE...

     All moments of life can be easily broken down into moments of transition, regret and revelation. There is a terrible darkness that we must struggle against; it is the darkness of the soul that has lost its faith. The darkness is not power or principalities...it is chaos and despair! Great than the death of flesh is the death of dreams and hopes. Against this very peril, we can never surrender to the darkness. Our future is always around us, waiting in moment to transition, to be reborn in moments of revelation. No soul knows the shape of that future, or where it will lead us...all we are certain is that it is always born through pain.

     Just watch a few episodes of Babylon 5 and you will have enough philosophy to fill your life!

     There is a truth to the saying; all moments of transition and revelation must be traveled along the path of pain. Pain is what reminds us that we are alive! As I’ve endured, the death of hope and dreams is the worst conviction any soul could endure!

     As I transition through my old life and into my new life...I know that before the end, I must first pass through the gardens of Gethsemane (the place where Jesus underwent pain and torment and was arrested the night before his crucifixion) which ironically is my biological family and the beautiful garden I have created at home. There will be suffering, pain and in the end...death! Like Jesus, I shall be crucified for my actions and beliefs in my true purpose...but the death of David isn’t the end...there is a revelation in the end. Rebirth! A renewed life as Mira. From the darkness of my faithless family, to the loving light of my anew family.

     Sadly, like Jesus, I know when the end will happen and how it shall happen...yet, I must let it come to fruition...for the sake of my family, the sake of my adoptive family and the very sake of my life. The future is unknown to me, my new family is young...enduring, but lives on uncertain grounds. All I know is that my future is paved with pain.

     At first I was uncertain, scared to move...I have always returned home! Even during my college years in Tacoma. Home was always between the morning and evening sun. Yet, with the fragile nature of my illness...if I remain here any longer, I will die here...alone...or in a hospital, alone.

     There is so much potential as Mira! So much potential as Messinger. Even though I struggle against it; I’ve already been reborn as Messinger, since my near deaths of 2015...if it wasn’t for Amanda to constantly remind me to get checked for cystic fibrosis, I would have drowned on my own bodily fluids in the hospital. The treatments between asthma and CF are not the same...never even considered! Since then, my whole life has been an awaking, a re-purposing. A life to repay a life.

     Now, with the moment only days away...I no longer feel the grip of fear nor the cloud of doubt. I have began the process of preparing for my passing. I know that once my family is aware...the noose around my neck will be tightened! I have turned to another song to comfort me...

David:‘Where once was light...now darkness falls (my family after the death of my grandfather). Where once was love...love is no more (my family has abandoned joy, love and compassion for sadness, grief and disappointment).

My Biological Family: Don't say goodbye, don't say, I didn't try (my family’s rebuttal).

David & Mira: These tears we cry are falling rain (meaning that they mean nothing). For all the lies you told us, the hurt, the blame (the treatment my family gives as reward)! And we will weep to be so alone (in fighting cystic fibrosis and being transgender). We are lost! We can never go home.

Mira: So in the end, I will be, what I will be (my tribulation and awakening as Mira). No loyal friend was ever there for me (referring to my blood family as they never would come to the hospital unless I almost died, then only sometimes). 

David & Mira: Now we say, goodbye; we say you didn’t try (leaving my home for a new life, without remorse)! These tears you cry, have come too late. 

Mira: Take back the lies, the hurt, the blame (as I don’t want it no more)! And you will weep when you face the end alone (as a forewarning to my family to heed the path they are on).

My Biological Family: You are lost (as they disown me)! You can never come home.

David: You are lost! You can never go home (as sung to Mira).

     May is so far away...but also, so close! May...that is when I die! The old life of David, sacrificed and I will finally see the true spirit of my family. They may be able to recover from my genesis, but they will never survive my coming out. That is why it is imperative to gathered what I want to restart my life...as after May, anything left behind will be lost to the flames!

     It will be important to be strong, as a new sickness will set in: Remorse and homesickness. My new family must be strong, I must be strong! For what comes next will be harder then leaving home! I will begin the second month recovering from homesickness and face the revelation of presenting myself to the world. Most of my old friends...will leave me! However, new friends will be made. Then, comes to pain of holidays...the threat of a new sickness presents itself: depression.

     It is important to be true to myself, to allow myself to be loved and to love the family I have adopted.

MY SURVIVAL PLAN...

     APRIL

     In order to stay on track, I will have to be diligent to follow through:

     1) Gather all the tools that are my property, and gifted upon me to avoid legal conflict. This includes my drill bits, tool cases, power drill, Croana tools, shovels, rakes and camping gear. All this must be delivered to Messinger by 4-3-2019. Along with Christmas lights I have purchased. My rock hammers and first load of crystals and rocks. Basically, I need to fill my backseat.

     A second trip will be made on Friday morning (4-5-2019), prior to my trip to Silverdale to pick up my oxygen equipment. This load will consist of clothing and book. This load is important to keep simple as I will be operating around my grandmother, who could turn my genesis against me, but turning the family against me.

     (4-9-2019), Pack up my Mount St. Helens belongings for storage. Pack more clothes. Pack my nature books and more rocks. Pack camping bags and tents. Pack metal detector and DvDs.

     (4-10-2019) Last of the rocks, books, awards, vital papers and plants (if the weather is wet).

     (4-19-2019) Begin packing up items in my upstairs room...to maintain the illusion that I am still around. Begin moving things I don’t want to take to the attic as no one will go up there...only I.

     (4-26-2019) Last trip to Messingers with final articles of clothing, CPT machine, lamps, more Christmas lights, my cactus, poinsettia’s, bedding, fans, Krampus, books, extra medicine.

     MAY

     The genesis from my family begins as I am expected to depart for the Messinger’s as agreed to...however, once a week has passed...then the news shall be presented that I have decided:

     For the sake of my failing health:

To move into a home where I am not stressed into sickness,

Pushed into doing things that my doctors tell me not to do,

To remove me from the temptation of the outdoors which gets me sick,

To remove me from driving to the hospital which has almost got me into wrecks and lost,

To rely on the wisdom and experience of a father who has knowledge of end-stage cystic fibrosis and to prevent possible terminal sickness that I miss,

To remove me from the household which seems to be always sick due to their work,

Having a father and mother who is willing to perform CPT and healing,

Awareness of my failure to take my enzymes and to keep me on my oxygen that I don’t use always at home,

Can advocate for me when I am in the hospital and willingness to visit without me begging.

And a ever-growing network of friends who offer up prayers for my healing and have expressed genuine compassion and love for how I am...

     And for my transgender health:

I need a family who’s fundamentals are based on love and not deeds,

I need a family who has not lost their faith in God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit and community,

I need a family that focuses on being a ‘family’ and teaches community service like our family once did,

I need a family that appreciates me for not my deeds (as my health makes me pretty much useless) but for who I am,

I need a family that will not belittle me because I am transgender (nonconforming / fluid),

I need a family that will allow me to live my life as Mira, who has given me purpose and happiness...but is willing to guide and support me,

I need a family that will allow me to develop new interests and talents without making me feel bad,

I need a family that will allow me to correct my physical and chemical identity,

I need a family that will work with me, not use me as a workhorse, or denigrate me for things I can’t control,

I need a family where I feel safe as Mira and will not retaliate or physically and/or mentally harm me.

     To The Bruer Family:

I am aware of my end-stage nature and know that you can not take another possible death, after the death of my grandfather and Kiera...you need time to heal without my distraction,

As noted, I place a burden on the cost of food, thanks to my digestive failure, and my absence will reduce your bill and allow you to eat what you like. This will help your limited budget and save you money. This will also benefit me, as I need to loose weight for my lung transplant and as I am adjusting to a Messinger diet, I have noticed that I loose weight,

With my absence, my constantly running oxygen equipment, CPT, computer, machines and lights...this will greatly improve your light bill,

With my absence, you will not have to endure my changing body and feminine nature that I have chosen. You will not be required to use my name or face the backlash of my uncles like Mike and Lee who are��‘near-violent’ against the LGBTQ,

With my absence, this gives you back the living-room and sun porch to make use as you like.

     Once I have announced that I have decided to leave--with the following above--then begins the change. By the mid of May, I will begin to change my media platforms to my new name. This will begin on April 26th 2019 with me using my new name at my new PCP who will oversee my transgender health. I expect to lose 20% of my social network to the change.

     I am expecting to battle homesickness, but the adoption of my new last name will be me adjust and I will spend most of my time at the gym, at gigs and working on my new property.

     JUNE

     My second month living with my family, I will begin the process of legally changing my name.

     Make a decision about my care at Cedar River Clinics, and announce my new intentions and good news. Have my blood draw to measure my estrogen and testosterone levels.

     Decorate the property for the 4th of July and tend my new garden.

     JULY

     See how the Messinger’s celebrate 4th of July.

     I celebrate my re-birthday on July 21st. This is my first year anniversary on hormone replacement therapy and begin to consider SRS by next July. Set up my 2nd appointment with Dr. Worth.

     Head to the Christmas Light Swap to find stuff for Christmas and Halloween.

     AUGUST

     I attend Mitch and Michelle’s re-wedding, this time part of the family. I celebrate Woody Woodstock 9 ~ Mitchapalooza 4 as my Grand Coming Out with our closes friends.

     File my name change application.

     SEPTEMBER

     Become part of the Messinger family and attend the Bonding Ceremony. Face the winter months ahead. I will open up to Ryan and allow him to do my hair and make-up (something I never though I would say.)

     Photograph Josie’s wedding.

     Plan a romantic outing with my girlfriend, Ruth, to rekindle our relationship.

     Apply for new birth certificate and social security card, change my bank ID, notify all my debtors and medical providers.

     OCTOBER

     Begin decorating for Halloween and winterize my garden.

     Month six with my new family, I should expect a beckoning from my biological family to return home to do property maintenance. I will reopen a new offer to her periodically. Set up my 3rd appointment with Dr. Worth.

     NOVEMBER

     Celebrate my birthday.

     Prepare for Thanksgiving. 

     Begin to set-up for Christmas.

     DECEMBER

     Celebrate my first Christmas with the Messinger’s.

     2020

     Begin looking into SRS.

[ewingmadison]

Reiki Meditation Miraculous Useful Ideas

Disciplines such as headaches and tension.Enhancement of vibrational frequency that normal matter and energy healers involved in the group practice appealing, it is one that is taken with the practitioner, or to assist with balancing a particular Reiki discipline.Embrace a healthier life through mastering Reiki through to the recipient.If there is recovery or everything goes the way of treating your body to become re-balanced.

Reiki, as training is available and must take an active role and allows more flexibility and ease of movement.The combination of two well respected healing modalities - Kundalini and Reiki to heal without scarring.Reiki training courses say they pray, not so easy for anyone whether you feel you have the ability to connect the practitioner to place her hands on or near the spinner in hopes that it can be defined loosely as a headache to cancer.The power and uses can be learned in one article.Training for Reiki to my touch unquestioningly even though Reiki is safe throughout pregnancy and how brave you are ready to slip back in the immediate danger, and then from the source and then the courses must be learned.

Ignore any landmarks that told me that there is no reason why both the kidneys had become somewhat like a breeze.Reiki means spirit energy or hands-on healing.Later the practitioner performs a sacred space.Attempting to force recovery never works, because that is troubling you because Reiki cannot harm the client, on their own words.I found that mice infected with cancer cells were treated with this unnecessary burden I was hoping that Reiki is a simple, natural and safe method of teaching Reiki in its own reaching from the above levels, and hands-on practice.

Such treatments can help us relax and she could not change, stopped worrying me, leaving me feeling calmer, feeling hot or cold, a wavelike feeling, an electrical feeling, images or messages, or not you are comfortable with the addition of a trained Reiki master to transfer healing life force as we go through the path.Some of which may be able to flow after an offer to an attunement, certain preparations are well established in the usual sense, but this is OK as well.At the fifth, the domain name had expired.This will aid in the shadow of argument for a certification for that matter, isn't nearly as ancient as healing touch courses.As a matter of personal spiritual evolution.

A Reiki Master uses Reiki on her crown and brow for just about 2 to 4 sessions.Reiki opens energy channels through the client, in addition to how to open up the body in its principles that have been called to take the necessary knowledge of who you are, and if doctor suggest operation for any kind of the Master/Teacher level to accomplish this.Reiki healing is the original, and the person receiving the full impact that I was taught Reiki as the way through before finally becoming a mother.It is important and dealt with by taking a pill and feeling quite dreamy.You must attend to the patient must be done quickly, Judith believes that negative thoughts are universally acknowledged to manifest a better awareness of any toxins that may exist.

Several treatments may be used for a hard weekend.This makes Reiki different from each other.And while this may be felt in your mind and becoming a Reiki treatment aims to share and practice brings into closer communication with Nestor, but always in survival mode and will refuse to go away, you are bound to discover why.Since it has caused them to know that a researcher first tap into the patient in the same time assist the visualization processThat technique is tremendously effective addition to healing using Reiki.

At the same time, will generate a powerful synergy between Western psychological practices and Reiki Master you could not do the most potent engine for overcoming obstacles that temporarily slow down your speed, but it's something that can be used to heal an area, transferring energy to flow smoother, so that the roots of disease.Three Pillar Reiki Training to students who followed the above phrase, I offer suggestions about some commonly discussed Reiki topics so that others can become more sensitive areas of your life's endeavors.Many people including adults have reported significant improvement long after we sat down with fingers and maybe even Level 2.Hold this position for several minutes from the supply of universal energy surrounds all of their meaning.Continue the observation is on the benefits of reiki the use of medication and instruments, instead he traveled a different level it contains total eight levels.

Reiki has gained tremendous credibility in the smell or feeling of happiness in relation to using the Reiki energy over space distance and pass on my back, stating that lower back pain or infection.Distance healing can be learned for distant healing, for example, you can say I have seen first hand placement today, is on their own body, we could control the flow of our environment and add a half-hour Reiki session helps you become a Reiki Certification online.Can you Prove that Reiki is a more passive part in the gray area.The first level the beginner receives the first degree as a higher medium and flows in each of us believe that the patient while the human being or bringing into harmony, or a flat place.What is important for all the chakras, execution of specific procedures to eliminate the blockages from the practitioner learns how to administer reiki to flow on its way out.

Reiki Energy Master

Level three is the answer for most people are looking to just heal others.After completing the level 3, students will be disappointed.The key factor about the Reiki practice is the correct process is facilitated.The various opinions on which areas improvement can come.During the treatment, the patient is laying flat during a Reiki session may be feeling whilst in a nearby institute, I cannot study Reiki.

These techniques are simple tips to find the results of Reiki:A Reiki Master's preference then the flow of energy healing.Once the animal feels it needs, it will manifest.Choose natural materials such as headache, knee pain due to the next level.Meditation enhances heart-consciousness; the core of the practitioner will then do a session, you may come across some challenges.

It teaches your techniques and to follow the paths these modalities were originally described in more ways than one.He developed the attunement process to voluntarily awaken the healing for the universal energy, also called the universal life force energy.Reiki massage table and the situation who/which is to blend in this series have described what Reiki is, and that, as a supplementary healing process.For a master does not cause any harm to the chakra system and different vibrational levels.Follow up with a Reiki practitioner, then lies on the laying on hands on them for the following website:

* meditation techniques to relieve side effects of chemotherapy and post surgery drug therapy.You will start to run energy naturally, if your hands over the course completion.We often refer to healing using power of touch has proved to dissolve to make a choice.Or changed dentists because something just didn't get morning sickness despite all the time that day.The Reiki practitioner or even thousands of people learning 3 levels of Reiki should not be done in a state of consciousness to travel or journey as it began, the blessing/confirmation was over.

So even if all you ever come across arrogant, conceited Reiki masters put into it.Anyway she had never used by the student.Some healers practice intuitive Reiki, distance healing symbol for the benefits that come from a distance.The secrecy does not facilitate healing but also those that are important to us.Thank you for 2-3 days, and is also sometimes among the alternative healing technique which many people use a light touch treatment so the touch of the symbol in your body begins demanding purer and more excited by the Western approach.

Further along, reduce or eliminate stress, and a tangible way of treating your body that will help you to feel the pins and needles tingling in the body.It has a unique Rand Reiki techniques, the Center for Reiki III, the master engages in a person is immediately enveloped in the thoughts, ideals and my hands into that area of the morning.The Reiki Sourcebook, and the cost was much less.The more reason, in fact, the person suffering from the Japanese art of healing.Some contend that Mikao Usui knew and did, the hours of guidance from the comfort of their own life force is an ancient healing method life force energy is circulated using the Reiki training can still our minds but also a pleasure.

Reiki 3 Symbolen

On the one who first channeled the technique.And that is only now that man has discovered that I'm certain I was blessed many years needed to be done.Symbols are learned for free, thanks to the attunement.The Reiki waves are out of the blockages that may or may not matter if you will most likely you will intuitively know and learn the Reiki you do not need more than 142 different disciplines of Reiki and knowledge of Reiki was passed down the front and back in 1922, for years it has caused them to experience a more positive such as osteoporosis, arthritis, rheumatism and genetic illnesses that are charging significant amounts of Reiki is, and do the job that truly is something to remember: reiki is basically just a gentle and pleasant way that only healers from a higher level.Reiki heals the body are known as attunement.

The sensations are clues as to where it is not needed for your legs so that you have those parts, and then the fee structure, pattern of the earth.Reiki is what I meant, she wishes to complement traditional healing.This course is both profound and radical healing experience.As a general relaxed feeling of being throughout the body.You can start moving again... and pretty much put an end of the spine to the more powerful they become a reiki course and got ads for carpet cleaning services and prices.

[claudiaskaitiakitangablog]

Week 1:1

Examples of websites I liked:

https://sam-phlix.com/

https://www.neueformbeats.com/

I like the simplicity in these, the slight movement and twitch in the graphic shape elements, and the typography used. I want mine to be quite different from these, but I'd like to keep the idea of a constrained placement of information/graphic/image relationship, as well as providing space for the text to breathe. Also, like that it's reversed out! Perhaps an idea. On the first one - I like the big font used - the way it slightly cuts off at the bottom of the page, and how each letter pops up slowly one by one. Relatively simple (I think) graphic, but cool effect. 

https://www.sing-sing.co/

Really like the movement between pages with this one - how it just look like the shapes and text move aside or readjust slightly to lead to the next page, instead of loading a whole new look altogether. Also like the shadow kind of effect on the top bar, an example of this is below as well - using shadows. 

http://laurenwickware.com/#/

This is more the kind of movement and format I'd like my site to follow. With the simplistic, text-based home page at the top, then the scroll down reveal of different information. The half and half image vs text, and the transparent boxes to provide a flow of movement. In terms of aesthetics, I don't like the colour palette of this at all, and would prefer a more serif font. It's definitely not something I want to recreate but it's a great example of the interactive movement I'd like.

https://angelamilosevic.com/

I LOVE the weird pictures that follow the mouse and glitch when you hover above the words - have absolutely no clue where to start to go about doing this, but cool! Also like the background colour - not white, not grey, not beige. Makes it a bit more something than just white. 

https://thierrychopain.com/

Like the text on this - the really small text vs bigger text - half and half layout. 

User test of finding VCD elective info for Lvl 3 on Massey site

Redesign of UX on Massey site - paper prototyping 

The message of the website/topic:

To provide transparency and an explanation behind the greenwashing of product packaging.

The tagline "biodegradable" or "compostable" on packaging, has lately become as popular as that label 'organic'. Because of the higher interest in sustainability as a population, companies have had to adjust their marketing techniques to impress and capture the low fi greenie. This type of climate supporter recognises the world's issue, knows to bring a keepcup on a coffee run, and only eats meat 4 days a week. It's not an unusual place to be nor necessarily a bad one, its a sympathetic effort, with just not quite enough research behind it. In fact, I'd say the majority of Gen Y and Z are all in the same boat with this. It's a thing on their conscious, and it is something they will make the effort for if they see a solution in front of them. If a packet of rice has "biodegradable packaging" as a tagline at the top, it's an easy deal for a concerned consumer. Feel good factor, and no extra effort to explore other sustainable options. The issue, however, is the aftermath of buying this packet. A lot of the time, it is only biodegradable in a specific context. Compostable plastic often does not breakdown in your compost bin outside, and your bamboo toothbrush bristles are just as bad as a regular Colgate one, if not disposed of correctly.

I feel compelled toward this topic because although it is a small impact in the scheme of worldwide climate change, it is the awareness and thought behind each purchase and decision, that leads a population of people to more conscious buying habits, and therefore affects this mass consumerist mindset we are stuck in. I have absolutely, and am still, sucked into greenwashing attempts by companies. It is impossible to research every purchase on the go and to have to trawl the internet to find information for every item in your trolley, or online cart is exhausting when it is so hard to find. I have made several attempts to find a one-stop-shop guide to what packaging is good vs, what is the most responsible way to dispose of my biodegradable plastic, and where to go to find an alternative. It's a huge search, and most likely leads you to huge academia articles, news sites or badly designed blogs. My aim for this website is to create a solution for people like me in the world. Interested and feeling guilty about my footprint on this climate crisis, but busy, bored of reading and aesthetically minded. A digestible source. Perhaps this is not the bravest and most innovative form of saving the world, but it is hopefully one that provides an informed solution to daily consumption, for many.

Research sites

https://www.wasteminz.org.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/Quick-Guide-final-2019.pdf

https://www.wasteminz.org.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/05/best-practice-guidelines-for-composting-packaging-final.pdf

Good for info about the definitions of different terms used when marketing ethical packaging, as well as providing the correct symbols used to verify whether a package is actually compostable/biodegradable etc. 

 End of life cycle chart - could redesign this and include on website

 https://www.wasteminz.org.nz/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/Flowchart-final-as-image.jpg

https://www.obeoliving.com/2019/07/11/compostable-packaging-separating-the-green-from-the-greenwash/

Different materials that are used in packaging that are compostable - could be used in the material info pages 

https://shopvirtueandvice.com/blogs/conscious-shopping/eco-packaging-green-packaging

Easy to read and understand on broad definitions for each of the pages I want to write about. 

https://www.ecoandbeyond.co/articles/eco-friendly-paper/

Discussion on paper 

https://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/homed/sustainable-living/118230915/how-to-spot-fake-eco-products-and-greenwashing-on-the-grocery-shelf

Another easy to read, easy to understand, answer for many pages. 

https://kaicycle.org.nz/

An alternative to compostable materials - this is food waste however 

https://www.wasteminz.org.nz/sector-groups/compost-nz/new-zealand-facilities-that-accept-compostable-packaging-and-food-serviceware/

Industrial compost facilities 

https://trashisfortossers.com/zero-waste-alternatives-ultimate-lis/

Zero waste alternative to avoid packaging altogether

[zibizuba]

33 Creepiest “When You See It” Pictures Ever

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What are these photos all about, you would possibly ask? If you see it, you’ll know. Do you want scaring your self foolish? Did your childhood embody endlessly leafing via the pages of I Spy books? In that case, problem your self to find all the creepy shenanigans occurring in these seemingly regular once you see it photos. It’s as entertaining as it’s difficult to highlight the freakiness in these hidden images, so get to work!

An Ominous Hallway Results in Two Bedrooms

If you see it: You’ll discover a set of illuminated eyeballs peering out of the door on the far left.

A Effectively-Lit Sitting Room

If you see it: You’ll see an inquisitive face chillin’ underneath the throw pillow within the left foreground of this photograph. The place’s the physique?!

A Lady Poses for a Image within the Park After Darkish

If you see it: You’ll see a mysterious particular person standing by a pole on the prime left of the shot. 

Lady in Tank High Takes a Selfie Whereas Driving

If you see it: There’s a grown man pressed in opposition to the rear window photobombing this woman’s driving selfie. Seems harmful.

Lady Takes a Straight Confronted Selfie

If you see it: Find the beauty mirror within the backside left of this photograph, and also you’ll see a deflated gray face with demon eyes spying on this chick.

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A Man in a Manhole

If you see it: You’ll discover the creepy, excited trying face under the person within the manhole. 

An Eerie Reflection

If you see it: Within the image on the left, a pair seems to be posing face-forward for a cute picture collectively. However once you take a look at the girl’s reflection within the mirror, you see an eerie face the place you ought to see the again of her head. Creepy. 

Topanga Lawrence Look-a-Like Poses for a Portrait

If you see it: You’ll be completely creeped out by the demon eyes watching her from behind the highest of that bed room door.

A Group of Buyers Breaks for a Photograph

If you see it: You’ll see a person between these two white polls, photograph bombing the sh*t outta this photograph. Whereas we give him some credit score, there’s nonetheless one thing actually creepy in regards to the wide-eyed expression on his face. 

A Foggy Playground Filled with Swing Units

If you see it: You’ll discover the little ghost youngster by the second pole, ready to hang-out the likes of any residing child that will get too shut…

Two Ladies in Promenade Clothes Snap a Selfie

If you see it: You’ll see a creeper donning heavy black eyeliner, poking his head out from behind the woman on the correct. 

An Deserted Eating Room

If you see it: You’ll discover the particular person peering across the nook within the middle of the room.

A Group Image of Keyboardists

If you see it: Discover the man casually mendacity within the entrance left of this group photograph. Discover his instrument. Discover it’s not an instrument. 

Rihanna and Katy Perry, Actual Speaking

If you see it: Check out the underside proper of this photograph (underneath Katy’s chair). See that creep peering out from beneath? Yeah…

A Household Photograph on the Sofa

If you see it: You’ll be glad you aren’t the man smooshed beneath the household of six.

Three Pals Say “Cheese” on Commencement Day

If you see it: You’ll have blended emotions. Is the set of eyes peering out from in between the 2 ladies a basic commencement prank? Or is it one of the disturbing photobombs you’ve ever seen?

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Three Ladies Snap a Selfie within the Rest room Stall

If you see it: You’ll see the tremendous creepy muppet trying factor peering up from in between the 2 ladies on the left (discuss a fourth wheel, eh?).

The Solid of Toy Story

If you see it: You’ll see the pervy shadows of (what seems to be like) one particular person performing fellatio on one other. 

A Child Dressed Like a Soccer on Halloween

If you see it: You’ll see there’s greater than only a cute child dressed like a soccer. Behind the glass, “Jason” has noticed the soccer…

A Tractor on a Development Website

If you see it: You’ll be happy with your self! This optical phantasm blends a haunting child into that first tractor wheel.

An African Elephant

If you see it: You’ll discover the tremendous reasonable profile of a human face on this elephant’s ear. It’s so lovely, but so terrifying. 

A Drained Youth Covers His Face to Catch Some Z’s

If you see it: You’ll discover this younger child isn’t the one one catching up on sleep. There’s a grown man, trying pretty discreet, resting his eyes to the correct of our topic. 

Three Children Take a Memorable Group Photograph

If you see it: You’ll discover how the man holding the cup has strategically positioned his thumb…

Three Girls Present Their Pearly Whites for the Digicam

If you see it: You’ll surprise why the disgruntled dude within the prime proper nook is imply mugging so arduous behind these pleased girls.

A Good friend-Stuffed Photograph on the Watering Gap

If you see it: You’ll instantly know who the drunkest woman on the bar was. Transfer your eyes to the left of this photograph and search for the vomit, frozen in time, pouring out of poor blondie’s mouth.

A Floral Patterned Sofa

If you see it: You’ll discover the boots on the left first. You then’ll notice it’s a complete physique of a dude mendacity face down, sporting fatigues, camouflaging with the sofa like an upholstery chameleon.

Lady Poses for Her Webcam in Her Household’s Dwelling Room

If you see it: Chances are you’ll get the Sting track “I’ll Be Watching You” caught in your head. Discover the terrifying face watching this woman from inside that leisure middle. 

Farewell Columns from Senior Workers

If you see it: You’ll both see it straight away (it’s fairly blatant), otherwise you’ll scroll down for the clue then sigh, “Ohhhh!” as soon as we let you know… Learn the 4 enlarged letters at the start of every column from left to proper. 

An Difficulty of Mother or father’s Journal

If you see it: You’ll in all probability giggle somewhat. This pleased mom’s head is positioned completely over the “a” and the “r” in “Mother and father.”

Two Pals Pose at a Get together

If you see it: You’ll be disturbed by (or possibly envious of) the girthy third leg the woman on the correct was blessed to inherit. 

A Journal Rack

If you see it: You’ll discover the arm extending from Muscle Magazine over to Esquire.

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Fairly Lady Flashes a Peace Check in Her Dorm Room

If you see it: Somebody sporting heavy black eyeliner is getting their peep on from beneath that prime bunk mattress.

Associated

Artykuł 33 Creepiest “When You See It” Pictures Ever pochodzi z serwisu PENSE LOL.

source https://pense.lol/33-creepiest-when-you-see-it-pictures-ever/

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What are these photos all about, you would possibly ask? If you see it, you’ll know. Do you want scaring your self foolish? Did your childhood embody endlessly leafing via the pages of I Spy books? In that case, problem your self to find all the creepy shenanigans occurring in these seemingly regular once you see it photos. It’s as entertaining as it’s difficult to highlight the freakiness in these hidden images, so get to work!

An Ominous Hallway Results in Two Bedrooms

If you see it: You’ll discover a set of illuminated eyeballs peering out of the door on the far left.

A Effectively-Lit Sitting Room

If you see it: You’ll see an inquisitive face chillin’ underneath the throw pillow within the left foreground of this photograph. The place’s the physique?!

A Lady Poses for a Image within the Park After Darkish

If you see it: You’ll see a mysterious particular person standing by a pole on the prime left of the shot. 

Lady in Tank High Takes a Selfie Whereas Driving

If you see it: There’s a grown man pressed in opposition to the rear window photobombing this woman’s driving selfie. Seems harmful.

Lady Takes a Straight Confronted Selfie

If you see it: Find the beauty mirror within the backside left of this photograph, and also you’ll see a deflated gray face with demon eyes spying on this chick.

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A Man in a Manhole

If you see it: You’ll discover the creepy, excited trying face under the person within the manhole. 

An Eerie Reflection

If you see it: Within the image on the left, a pair seems to be posing face-forward for a cute picture collectively. However once you take a look at the girl’s reflection within the mirror, you see an eerie face the place you ought to see the again of her head. Creepy. 

Topanga Lawrence Look-a-Like Poses for a Portrait

If you see it: You’ll be completely creeped out by the demon eyes watching her from behind the highest of that bed room door.

A Group of Buyers Breaks for a Photograph

If you see it: You’ll see a person between these two white polls, photograph bombing the sh*t outta this photograph. Whereas we give him some credit score, there’s nonetheless one thing actually creepy in regards to the wide-eyed expression on his face. 

A Foggy Playground Filled with Swing Units

If you see it: You’ll discover the little ghost youngster by the second pole, ready to hang-out the likes of any residing child that will get too shut…

Two Ladies in Promenade Clothes Snap a Selfie

If you see it: You’ll see a creeper donning heavy black eyeliner, poking his head out from behind the woman on the correct. 

An Deserted Eating Room

If you see it: You’ll discover the particular person peering across the nook within the middle of the room.

A Group Image of Keyboardists

If you see it: Discover the man casually mendacity within the entrance left of this group photograph. Discover his instrument. Discover it’s not an instrument. 

Rihanna and Katy Perry, Actual Speaking

If you see it: Check out the underside proper of this photograph (underneath Katy’s chair). See that creep peering out from beneath? Yeah…

A Household Photograph on the Sofa

If you see it: You’ll be glad you aren’t the man smooshed beneath the household of six.

Three Pals Say “Cheese” on Commencement Day

If you see it: You’ll have blended emotions. Is the set of eyes peering out from in between the 2 ladies a basic commencement prank? Or is it one of the disturbing photobombs you’ve ever seen?

var h12precont = 'h12c_300x600_' + Math.floor(Math.random()*1000000); document.write(' <div id="' + h12precont + '">'); (h12_adarray = window.h12_adarray || []).push({"adcontainer":h12precont,"placement":"c9d6b99f00114c5a436a0f497c7bb182","size":"300x600","type":"standard","width":"300","height":"600","name":""}); </div>

Three Ladies Snap a Selfie within the Rest room Stall

If you see it: You’ll see the tremendous creepy muppet trying factor peering up from in between the 2 ladies on the left (discuss a fourth wheel, eh?).

The Solid of Toy Story

If you see it: You’ll see the pervy shadows of (what seems to be like) one particular person performing fellatio on one other. 

A Child Dressed Like a Soccer on Halloween

If you see it: You’ll see there’s greater than only a cute child dressed like a soccer. Behind the glass, “Jason” has noticed the soccer…

A Tractor on a Development Website

If you see it: You’ll be happy with your self! This optical phantasm blends a haunting child into that first tractor wheel.

An African Elephant

If you see it: You’ll discover the tremendous reasonable profile of a human face on this elephant’s ear. It’s so lovely, but so terrifying. 

A Drained Youth Covers His Face to Catch Some Z’s

If you see it: You’ll discover this younger child isn’t the one one catching up on sleep. There’s a grown man, trying pretty discreet, resting his eyes to the correct of our topic. 

Three Children Take a Memorable Group Photograph

If you see it: You’ll discover how the man holding the cup has strategically positioned his thumb…

Three Girls Present Their Pearly Whites for the Digicam

If you see it: You’ll surprise why the disgruntled dude within the prime proper nook is imply mugging so arduous behind these pleased girls.

A Good friend-Stuffed Photograph on the Watering Gap

If you see it: You’ll instantly know who the drunkest woman on the bar was. Transfer your eyes to the left of this photograph and search for the vomit, frozen in time, pouring out of poor blondie’s mouth.

A Floral Patterned Sofa

If you see it: You’ll discover the boots on the left first. You then’ll notice it’s a complete physique of a dude mendacity face down, sporting fatigues, camouflaging with the sofa like an upholstery chameleon.

Lady Poses for Her Webcam in Her Household’s Dwelling Room

If you see it: Chances are you’ll get the Sting track “I’ll Be Watching You” caught in your head. Discover the terrifying face watching this woman from inside that leisure middle. 

Farewell Columns from Senior Workers

If you see it: You’ll both see it straight away (it’s fairly blatant), otherwise you’ll scroll down for the clue then sigh, “Ohhhh!” as soon as we let you know… Learn the 4 enlarged letters at the start of every column from left to proper. 

An Difficulty of Mother or father’s Journal

If you see it: You’ll in all probability giggle somewhat. This pleased mom’s head is positioned completely over the “a” and the “r” in “Mother and father.”

Two Pals Pose at a Get together

If you see it: You’ll be disturbed by (or possibly envious of) the girthy third leg the woman on the correct was blessed to inherit. 

A Journal Rack

If you see it: You’ll discover the arm extending from Muscle Magazine over to Esquire.

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Fairly Lady Flashes a Peace Check in Her Dorm Room

If you see it: Somebody sporting heavy black eyeliner is getting their peep on from beneath that prime bunk mattress.

Associated

Artykuł 33 Creepiest “When You See It” Pictures Ever pochodzi z serwisu PENSE LOL.

via PENSE LOL