#i actually like started writing a blurb for the caption
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Something where someone (your pick from shoresy or LK) ask to meet up by text but you say you have a man in your bed, they're confused af but turns out you rescued a cat?
STOOOOPPP IM OBSESSED WITH THIS LMAO!!! Thank you so much for sending this request in, it's so perfect and I had tons of fun writing it! I decided to do little blurbs with everyone I've written for in both the LK and Shoresy universe so I hope you enjoy <3
Fatal AttraC(A)Tion
Fluff
Shoresy, Wayne, Daryl, Coach x gn!reader
Warnings: cussing, suggestive language
Shoresy:
"I know I'm like, always confused, but I am extra confused right now."
Shoresy had just finished hockey practice when he texted you, asking if he could come to your place to hang out for the rest of the night. He certainly wasn't expecting your response of: "Please don't come over !! I have a man in my bed rn!!"
"Oh, that's no good, mah boy! You best get yourself o'er there and send the unlucky bastard scramblin' out tha door!"
"You're right, Hitch, you have a point. I'm not letting another man come between me and my partner and I mean that in both entendres."
"Settle down," said Goody, taking a sip of water.
Shoresy was quick to leave the barn and head to your place, nervous to see who he was going to find lying next to you. As he entered the bedroom door, he pushed up his sleeves, getting ready for a fist fight. To his surprise, there was no human man to be seen anywhere. Instead, he was greeted with you and an unfamiliar orange cat lying on his side of the bed.
"Look baby, Shoresy's home! My favorite two men in this whole world," you cooed, the cat purring as it cuddled up to you. Shoresy relaxed, happy you were just messing around with him, and looking forward to cuddling two very cute creatures all night.
Wayne:
You felt bad joking like this to Wayne, knowing he had been cheated on in the past, but you couldn’t help yourself as you sent the text message: “can’t meet rn. me and my other man are in bed.”
When Wayne received said text message, he sped over to your place in a flash, his stoic expression turning the slightest bit more sour than usual. After he slammed his truck door closed, he rolled up his sleeves, readying himself for a brawl. However, when he entered your bedroom, he just stood there very confused.
“Here’s the man I was talking about.” You held up a black cat with white paws. “I just rescued him! Isn’t he cute?”
Wayne stood in silence for a few moments before speaking. “Okay, y/n. Y/n, okay. That is a very cute cat.”
He took several big strides and abducted the cat from you, cuddling it close to his chest.
“You can have him back after I get an apology for making me worry.” He scratched the cat under its chin, making it purr. “And after I get an apology for not adopting two of these.”
Daryl:
“Does this mean what I think it means?”
Daryl was at MoDean’s trying to decipher the text you had just sent him. It was a picture of you lying in bed with a mass of blonde hair on your chest, captioned “don’t come over, my man and I are having alone time.”
“I knows y/n, we all do, and that doesn’t seem like their types of behaviors,” said Squirrely Dan.
Katy then spoke up, “But it is weird. I think you should go check it out. Let us know if you need backup.”
Daryl agreed and drove his van over to your house in a hurry, confused as ever. He walked into your bedroom, fully expecting to see you with another man, but what he actually saw couldn’t have been further from what he assumed.
“I got us a cat!” you exclaimed, holding up the cream colored cat. “Isn’t he just adorable?”
“You really threw me for a loop with that text,” Daryl said, frowning, but perking up when the cat ran over to his leg and started nuzzling him. “He is really cute though. This is the only other man I’d ever want in my bed.”
“Me too, Daryl, don’t worry,” you said, pulling him in for a kiss.
Coach:
“I’m kinda busy rn, me and my man are lying in bed.”
“What the fuck are they talking about?!”
Coach was ready to crush his phone in anger. What did you mean, your man? HE was your man, your only man! He furiously typed back a response, telling you he’d be over at your place in no time, and he spent the whole trip muttering to himself about how he was going to kick that guy’s ass for laying next to his partner. He practically busted your door down, huffing and puffing as he stared you down. You were completely unbothered by Coach’s abrasive entrance, even laughing about it, as you lounged with a cat running in circles on your bed.
“Coach! Glad to see you made it to meet our newest roommate.”
“Don’t scare me like that, y/n, I was seriously pissed off!” He was pointing an accusatory finger at you until the cat pounced on it, clawing lightly at his skin. Coach immediately broke into a smile, cooing and giving the cat scratches on its ears. It looked like your two favorite men got along swimmingly!
#letterkenny x reader#shoresy x reader#shoresy x y/n#shoresy#wayne x reader letterkenny#coach x reader letterkenny#daryl x reader letterkenny#dary x reader
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Hi azzie how are you??? When will you post next xxxx
Hii anon!! Sorry guys, I kinda went AWOL for a bit here, I’ve been somewhat swamped 😭 anon are you British? X hehe, just curious bc of the kisses.
I had a dream where I did a get to know me post and then got SWATTED 😭 would we want a get to know Azzie? I don’t think so, but lmk! Send questions if so (don’t SWAT team me 😭)
Writing Updates: trust, I will have Ben Shelton posts and a Jude blurb coming up eventually! If not this week, then next.
I’ve got a (albeit, belated) Halloween party coming up + a lot of work shifts this week + college starts tmr :( but I’ve got a lot of free time if I push out these assignments so..pray for me.
Azzie Updates + ChitChat: First of all I wanna say: tysm for the love on the works this past week!!!!! :,) you’re all so sweet and kind, I always say I love tumblr so much and it’s only bc of people like you guys liking and reblogging and commenting and sending me feedback that makes it such a sweet, fun, great place!
Second off, question! are any of those crazy amazing Ben Shelton TikTok editors with the freaky ass captions on tumblr? Bc I’ve been scrolling through posts all night, literally cackling at those captions and in awe of their editing skills, they need to proofread my writing drafts, they’re the realest mfs here.
I’ve just checked my inbox for the first time in a few days- YOU 🫵 😧 are FREAKYYYY AS FUCK 🫵😧 … HOLYYY SHIT???? Are we all ovulating..? The amount of NSFW requests you people want me to write, and you guys write it so sweetly too it makes me laugh sooo hard “Azzie hey girl! Love you! can you write a blurb about me and Ben and in public and he’s crazy and-” - TOUCH GRASS OH MYYYY GOD! GIRLS! Hahah kidding I’m just as bad……did you guys see that NSFW Ben Shelton tarot reading from @castingspellsanddaisies ? i am actually….feral?.. I can’t stop reading it … my face is WARM thinking about it; wdymm he’s good at it (duh ofc he is)…. Let me test that out…for research and writing purposes, obviously.
Um, anyways.. I underestimated an assignment of mine and I’ve been grinding on that (literally due in 3 hrs…almost done it tho!), I’ve another one due Wednesday + uni starts back tomorrow and I’ve got to go for attendance, so I’m prob pulling an all-nighter tonight 😵💫 im SICK of university and im sick of STEM, i deserve to be living the Morgan Riddle life but Ben Shelton edition. Sorry not sorry!
I’ve also been super badly sick, I passed out at work the other day and I’ve got no appetite whatsoever, I had a fever earlier this week - idk what’s going on w me! Autumn-winter always makes me feel like I’m a Victorian child. I feel wayyyy better than how I did a few days ago, but I’ve trying to take it easy and relax a bit, pls forgive me 😓
maybe tmr after I finish all my pending works I’ll write smut in the library…like a freak 💀😭 we’ll see anyways, good chat, back to my assignment I go 😞
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Rant under the cut
That whole Cassie Reffel author drama just goes to show that some people don’t know how to separate reality from fiction and then it gives other writers who touch on dark topics a bad name.
For those who don’t know, Cassie Reffel is a self-published author who writes dark romance. She recently got some heat for using real life killer Wade Wilson (not Deadpool) who was recently sentenced to death for the brutal murders of two women as a way to promote one of her books. Her video was so tactless with 0 respect for the victims, showing a photo of Wilson with a caption along the lines of “if you like him you’ll love this” followed by a picture and description of her book. Don’t have the exact quote since she’s deleted the original, but I’m sure screenshots are floating around. Instead of apologizing, she doubled down, turned off all comments where she was able, and made a bunch of unhinged TikToks in a row absolving herself of all wrongdoing.
If you’re going to write about serial killers maybe don’t do so in a way that glorifies a real murderer?? It’s bad enough Wade Wilson already has fangirls making thirst traps of him and trying to contact him in prison. Absolutely disgusting. No one would even know who she was if not for this controversy. Her self-published books read like a teenager trying to be edgy on Wattpad, complete with mistakes like “strole” instead of “stroll” and one of her characters being a “collage” student. An actual publisher wouldn’t touch her middle school writing with a 40 foot “poll.” That and with the way she can’t take any criticism shows she’s not cutout to be an actual author at all.
My favorite thing though? Her little blurb on her Amazon author profile starts with “welcome to the darkness of my mind” literally not too far off from “welcome to my twisted mind” which I’m sure she probably wanted to use, but couldn’t because it’s been meme’d to shit. 2012 tumblr ass behavior.
This could go into a longer discussion about how true crime and booktok have further contributed to this ongoing brainrot of not honoring victims while glorifying murderers, but I’m already fuming lol.
I once got into it with someone on TikTok because they said I was glorifying murder by posting about Lady Dimitrescu, a fictional villain. I told them to save that energy for the true crime girlies selling serial killer merch on Etsy. Lady Dimitrescu isn’t real, no actual living person has been harmed by her actions. Enjoying an interesting villain from a fictional world is in no way and never has been on par with people being fans of actual murderers. I don’t condone Alcina’s actions, yes, even when I write a fic that involves those in character actions. These pathetic serial killer simps make excuses for actual murders that have happened because ~their poor little baby was misunderstood~ barf. Even being a fictional villain fan, I hate the woobification of said fictional villains and then these bitches are out here doing it with real people 💀 get fucked.
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Indie Music Rec: Carsie Blanton
I wanted to promote an independent musician I'm a fan of, so here's a music rec post!
tl;dr:
Music: Folk, country, punk, maybe pop with some songs if you squint? Some love songs, some protest songs. Tempo varies wildly based on song. Definitely catchy. Some are sing alongs.
Vibes: Leftist, anti-capitalist, clearly channels her rage at the system into much of her music. Funny. Genuine. Passionate. She might just be on tumblr now actually it looks like the url is taken and probably actually by her but not used since 2018
Identity: From the American South, Jewish, Millennial-ish. Doesn't really center her own identity or story in most of her music.
Carsie Blanton... where do I even start in recommending her?
There's how she's about as far left as my own corner of tumblr tends to be. (I swear I heard her describe herself as politically "somewhere between Bernie Sanders and Karl Marx" but now I can't find the quote. It sounds about right, though.) How she refers to herself as "socialist" unabashedly and rails against the excesses of capitalism. How one of her songs has the lyric "you're just a Democrat, I'm a revolutionary".
How she has a song inspired by her response to the Charlottesville rally, and how the rally hit home for her, as she grew up in central Virginia as one of the only Jewish kids around.
How her songs channel her leftist rage, advocate protest, tear apart the system we're living in.
But importantly, she's not just writing protest songs, she's writing catchy protest songs that are genuinely quality pieces of music to boot.
When I saw her in concert a couple months ago, she mentioned how Dolly Parton's "9 to 5" is great because it's about as far left as you can get while still being a catchy pop song, and I think Carsie Blanton's own music fits that pretty well too.
I posted not too long ago about how my mom saw her posting something pro-Palestine and thought she was going too far because of it. I looked up the post in question; it had the caption "Free Palestine" along with some informative text that wouldn't look out of place in a tumblr post. Nothing radical, nothing anti-Israel. Just support for the Palestinian people. And while that might cost her some fans in and of itself--I think my mom's lost some interest in her because of it--I think it's a good example of how her leftism isn't just an act, or deployed just when it's popular. She speaks out for what's right, regardless of what the rest of the world thinks.
Now, that's enough of an introduction, I think. So I'll leave you with some examples of her music, and a quick blurb about each song I'm linking.
This is the one in response to Charlottesville, and it's the sort of fast-paced, angry song you might expect:
youtube
This one's also very anti-capitalist but a bit slower and more mellow, though that's not to say it won't get stuck in your head fast:
youtube
This is the one that first got her on my parents' radar, a fitting tribute to beloved country artist John Prine:
youtube
Apparently this one's big on Tiktok? I believe it, it's got the fast pacing and witty lyrics for that crowd. (Age-restricted because it uses the word "bitch" a lot, I imagine. Title is "Ugly Nasty Commie Bitch".)
youtube
This is the one with the lyrics I quoted above, despite being not generally a political song, just a fun silly listen:
youtube
Not quite as upbeat as the title might make it seem, but very fitting vibe for the current moment given, y'know, everything:
youtube
Are you an American with deeply divided feelings about what that means given your place of privilege in the world but being stuck in a system that keeps causing harm? Carsie Blanton feels that too:
youtube
Another slower, mellow one, and not political this time, but this one's gotten stuck in my head a few times lately:
youtube
And finally, a sing-along that seems like the perfect way to wrap things up:
youtube
#i've been thinking about this post for long enough time to actually make it#i've had buck up stuck in my head for hours for some reason#personal#shitpost#music recs#carsie blanton#music artists#Youtube
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Originally a Land of the Fallen Fairies blog, with the occasional rottmnt. This has evloved into 'rottmnt superfan makes an AU and 100+ posts with three followers (one of them being my sibling) and goes insane. /pos.
(the old stuff is still here btw)
Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles AU.
Is this show the best thing to ever exist? Yes. Did the fandom make it even better? Also yes.
Can I try combining the two? Here's hoping.
This AU consist of - the older sisters, Mikey getting more 'episodes', Donnie getting validation + being besties with Baron Draxum and so on and so forth.
If the links don't work, try this post
Concept post
Backstory ramblings
Frida, daughter of Big Mama and the eldest turtle.
More Frida, and Louise - the one trapped in another dimension.
Basically a bookmark for Donnie reference
Frida's upbringing.
Louise, the god-child of the other dimension
Louise plays with old Kraang mechs
Leo meets Frida
Louise has her own fashion show. (ft- old Kraang mechs)
Frida and Donnie hack the government
Legalize Nuclear Bombs trio
Louise
Frida fights with Leo
Louise gets a glow up
'I understand you, little brother'
Baron Draxum raised Louise
Frida meets Louise. ft: turtle tots
Donnie headcannons
Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Show Notes.
As a rottmnt superfan, I think it's very shameful I have not actually watched the full series. I have been trying to get myself to watch all of it for literal months, and I will finally start now.
To keep my motivation to actually watch my favorite show (wow) I will be writing down little things I like/notice/one sentence summary of each episode.
Plus I want to do the AU with the events of the show but a "little to the left" including the missing sisters, Mikey getting his deleted episodes back, ideas that couldn't be used because the show was cancelled, fandom ideas, etc. etc.
AND this is also doubling as info from each episode, so that way I don't forget anything important.
(Like I forgot Heuso existed. Who does that?)
Mystic Mayhem
Mystic Mayhem Donnie notes.
The Land of the Fallen Fairies.
A story about some non-humans with no human contact and is as far from reality as possible.
A story told in captions and multimedia that is meant to be my comfort story. It's about a unreliable narrator that is so in faer head that the actual plot happens in the background. Literal civilizations are dying and faer guardian may be destined to kill faer, but Anuli has something more to think about. Fae can't stay happy or go for too long without making a mistake that ends up hurting everyone else, so fae uses faer hyper fixation to fix faer overthinking and general incompetence. After all, if Anuli isn't the antagonist anymore, fae will get a happy ending, right? That's the hope anyways, that one day fae will be someone that will put the other's care to good use instead of wasting it.
General tag
Anuli's thots
Blurb
fiddle leaf figs
"I have a tree?"
Meet Anuli, your resident tree-less dryad. (The others are baffled, how can a tree fairy not have a tree?) Fae is story obsessed, and constantly overthinking, to the point where reality is just something fae has to deal with from time to time... and it's getting really unpleasant actually. Why does everything Anuli tries either fall apart or go well but... not really be the thing that gets fixes what fae messed up. If only fae could live in a constant daydream-
oh. Bad idea.
milanote - where most of the info is
The Mundane Magic series
Based off a tumblr post, here's a story about having control about what your mundane magic.
Part one - the concept
Part two - character prose
#pixie ocs#storytelling#oc stuff#fiction#take care of yourself#dryads#oc story#oc#oc art#ocs#my ocs#original character#digital art#oc rp#writeblr#writer things#writers on tumblr#writerscommunity#writers and poets#creative writing#writers#writing#the land of the fallen fairies#anuli the dryad#Anuli#needle felted#needle felting#rise frida
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Thiam AU: Monroe and her gang of hunters has managed to kill all of Scott’s pack except for Theo and Liam. Theo convinces Liam that the only way to survive is to kill.
#thiam#twedit#liam dunbar#theo raeken#teen wolf#i actually like started writing a blurb for the caption#but then it quickly became like 1500 words so ig im just writing a fic based off of this lmao#liam has cried twice already#so here's a visual to keep me motivated to finish#char: theo raeken#char: liam dunbar#tv: teen wolf#*#my gifs#mytw#100
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Worship me
Warnings: 18+, unedited, yandere au, idol yoongi, stalking, online harassment, mentions/fantasies of sex and masturbation, obsession
Note: I wrote most of this in an hour. No one speak to me, I am unheathily in love with this yoongi. Also, I didn’t have the brainpower to write a like actual story with scenes and stuff, so I’ll probably post the little blurbs and such to go with this.
Until recently, Yoongi never found himself absorbed in his social media. Other than his members, and close personal friends he didn’t find himself scrolling aimlessly or jumping to see anyone’s new posts. That was until he stumbled on your profile. He was bored one night, and couldn’t sleep as he tossed and turned in bed so he went scrolling through his feed to check out what the other members were up to. He huffed as he accidentally clicked on Jin’s likes rather than hearting them.
He would’ve click off right away like usual, but he stopped at the last second to see your profile nestled towards the top of the list. He tilted his head, why not check out some profiles? It would pass the time and hopefully bore his insomnia away. Maybe it would have worked if he hadn't spent well over an hour just looking at your posts, reading every caption; piecing together some kind of life story to go with your admittedly cute face. He closed Instagram and called it a night, thinking nothing more of you.
Too bad he woke up the next morning, sleep-deprived and cranky; only to open Instagram and scroll. Just for a few minutes to wake up, but eventually, he found himself typing in your username without much of a thought as to if you had posted- you had. He had to stop himself from liking it. What was he thinking? He could only imagine what would come from his official account liking some random girl's post just minutes after she posted it.
No more, he told himself, there was no need to go to your profile to kill boredom. He got ready for the day and headed to the studio to do something far more productive.
Productivity came hard though, as every day his desire to check your profile grew. He couldn’t help it, you were so cute and your posts were addicting- there wasn’t even much special about them, Yoongi told himself one evening, but still he looked. After a week of taking in every selfie and photo, reading your captions closely, and making his way through your older posts; he had completely sunken into the never-ending hole that was stalking your profile. He made note of everything you did, your likes, what you ate that day; it felt weird at first, but every day he found himself caring less and less. He was alone, doing it in his free time. You posted it all for people to see, so didn’t he have a right to look?
Every few minutes he checked for your updates, he hated not being able to follow you. Sometimes the temptation to do so struck him hard, but he held off. He wanted to comment, and tell you how beautiful you were. How much he loved your interests and humor, hated how you interacted with other men in your comments. He wanted to talk to you, this wasn’t fair. Didn’t he deserve to talk to you?
Yoongi was drinking more than usual, why? He couldn’t say. Maybe sipping on liquor and staring at you has become his new favorite pastime. He spent god knows how long locked in his studio doing it, his work neglected as he favored you. He’d get tipsy, get flirty and think about everything he’d say to you. He typed it out sometimes, teasing the idea of sending you a message.
He wanted to send them, so badly.
He’d get upset, start drinking more and then get sloppy with his messages. They turned from light and flirty to downright awful. Paragraphs filled with how much he wanted you, in every way he wanted you. How he thought about going to that cafe you were always at just to see you, how he wanted to give you everything, how he wanted to touch you; how he wanted to fuck you and never speak to you again, or how he wanted to be with you forever. Use you. Love you.
Sometimes he would get a little too worked up thinking about, staring at pictures as you went out in cute outfits with your friends. Tonight was starting to feel that way, he was leaning back at his desk, eating up your new post about going out to the bar with some old friends. You weren’t that dressed up, inches of your skin weren't on display. You looked how you usually did, but Yoongi found himself shifting in his seat uncomfortably as his cock twitched in his pants. He was growing warm, mouth a bit dry as he m ogled over your pictures. Never had he considered himself to be so needy like this, but he couldn’t help but to slip down his pants and tug at his cock. Just thinking about you did something to him, made him want to whine for you to touch him; be with him.
He stood, one hand keeping him propped up against his desk as his head lulled down, little grunts and half moans filling the dark studio. His eyes fluttered open, looking at the space of the empty desk beneath him. He could imagine you laying there under him. Thrown with care in a rush of passion, his hungry eyes traced your every curve. Sometimes his fantasies felt so real, in the daze of lust he’d reach for you under him only to be reminded that you weren’t there.
He’d wake up the next morning and feign guilt for even thinking to speak to anyone that way, but deep down he knew he had passed guilt a long time again. What he said was true, and he wanted you to know it. He never felt guilt for getting off to the thought of you though. You were always posting such cute photos, didn’t he deserve to do it?
Two months into his insistent stalking a new face started to appear in your posts. Though you always said he was a friend in your captions or comments, Yoongi felt an immense weight of jealousy on his shoulders every time. Sometimes he could barely look at your profile, you posted too much with that damn guy. It pissed him off, unreasonable anger boiling in his as he gripped his phone tighter and rolled his eyes. The way you let other men put their hands on you. His arm was thrown over your shoulder, smiling ear to ear, or how when he held your waist in one.
He’d get drunk and think about all the nasty things he’d call you, and all the horrible things he’d do to that guy if he ever saw him.
Call him insane, but he created a fake profile just days after so that his fantasies of talking to you could be true. Still, locked in his dark studio with desire squirming and eating at his insides, he went all in. He couldn’t calm himself down to play it cool- he was damn near begging you to stop posting that guy, to accept his affection and not his. He went on and on about you, how he had been watching your profile- how one day he saw you at your favorite cafe, that he waited for hours hoping you’d come.
You read it but didn’t reply.
Tonight he was fuming, and a bit tipsy as he looked at your new post. He wet his lips, eyes burning as he kept a hard stare on his screen. Whoever that guy you are with was, he looked pathetic. Yoongi could only sneer. If only you knew that he had messaged you, not some random faceless man, but Min Yoongi- the Min Yoongi. Far superior to any random man you would ever post in your feed.
Rather than continued to gravel at the will of your Instagram feed with fucked up fantasies of you, occasionally hoping to see you in public and just look at your beauty. He should be making you chase him. If only you knew, you’d be at his fucking feet in an instant. The image sent a thrill to his head. He didn’t care about keeping his ego in check anymore. He was Min Yoongi; a genius producer, a worldwide superstar. Other men could never compare, you should be at his feet begging for every part of him.
He deserved you, how dare you disrespect him? How dare you not reply to his messages, shouldn’t you be grateful? You post so much, didn’t you deserve this?
He dragged a hand through his hair, his mind clouded with lust as he stared at your story. You were laying in bed with your cat, smiling as it walked over your stomach, the camera panning up to your smile as you giggled. A harmless video was no longer harmless to him, everything set him off. Everything you did made him want you more. He couldn’t recall a time that he had yearned so hard for someone, but it felt so good. He lets out a light sigh, rubbing himself over his jeans as he thinks about how you’d look so much better laying in his bed, or over his desk, or anywhere as long as he was there.
Though, he didn’t whine for you or think about how much he wanted you with him; he thought about how he deserved your presence. You should be here letting him have you, he deserved it. He was Yoongi, you should be here all over him. His eyes passed over his liquor bottles sitting untouched, he had stopped having to get drunk to think about you this way weeks ago. He ignored what that said about him, or how it marked how he was changing every day; falling deeper into a worse person.
He didn’t care anymore, he was Yoongi. He could do what he wanted, he had every right to treat you like this in his head and through the messages you still ignored. He wondered for just a second what the others would think of him if they found out. One day Namjoon had almost seen the messages on his phone, and Yoongi almost challenged him to see them and say something. So confident in his obsessions he was.
He was Min Yoongi after all, he deserved to have you at his feet worshiping him.
#bts#bts x reader#bts imagine#yoongi x reader#yoongi imagine#min yoongi#min yoongi imagine#min yoongi x reader#suga x reader#suga imagine#bts suga#yandere suga#yandere min yoongi#yandere yoongi#yandere suga x reader#yandere min yoongi x reader
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can you do a blurb or hc of spencer and readers first date together?
this was my list of places i think he'd like to go on dates
for a first date, i'm going to say a museum
i think he'd only pick you up if you know each other well before because otherwise it can be a little awkward
and he'd bring flowers, of course
probably takes you to one of the Smithsonian like natural history or air and space museum or maybe the national gallery of art, depending on what you're interested in
not the national archives museum because i would kill him or myself out of boredom
very nervous to start with, but then he decides not to listen to morgan's advice and starts talking facts
and he knows everything
literally everything
maybe it's less of a surprise if you work with him but if you don't, it's like wow
at some point he tells you, not in a braggy way, he helps them write with the little display captions (idk what they're called but you know what i mean)
but the whole time he just tells you facts
with all the little hand gestures which are so cute
and his voice is so nice to listen to
you debate recording him and starting a podcast
he probably gets distracted for a moment talking to some little kids like he's their tour guide
apologizes profusely afterward but you don't care because it's so cute and he's so good with kids
he's even cuter when he tells you about the times he brought his godson(s) there
and you spend so long there, probably until it closes
then he's like 'i know this wasn't the plan, but would you like to get dinner?' and it's so much more confident than he was when he asked you out
takes you somewhere relatively, like fancy enough they only take reservations
and he's just like 'oh, yeah, i know the chef'
who comes out to see him
which is a little intimidating because he's smart, handsome and everyone seems to love him
because he sort of dominates the conversation before, he's asking you lots of questions and getting to know you while you eat
and he's actually hilarious, you discover
so you're pretty much laughing the whole time and have a bunch of inside jokes
he's a great listener as well and you're sure he'll remember little details about you
he's so perfect you're unsure about why no one's snatched him up, but you're thankful everyone else is too ignorant to realize how amazing he is
which you tell him
and he gets all shy and blushy
i think he'd pay which can be kinda awkward but he's chill about it and doesn't think twice
then he takes you home, like walks you to your door and everything, because it has to be over at some point :(
and you're like :(
and he's like :(
you're both stretching the rest of your time together out as long as possible
and he's all nervous again, like he was when he first asked you out because 'i really liked hanging out with you' but he's not sure you did even though you were smiling the whole time
and you reply with something teasing before telling him you'd love nothing more than to go out with him again
and he gives you that perfect smile
so you kiss him, probably only on the cheek
bonus points if there's lipstick involved
and he tells you goodnight and as soon as you shut the door, he presses his hand to where you kissed him and grins
then he drives back to his place in silence with a stupid big grin
and he probably calls you that night or the next morning, no weird waiting games
#spencer reid#criminal minds#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid headcanon#spencer reid hc#spencer reid fandom#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x you
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"now we're stopping the world, stopped it in its tracks. nothing's too broken to find our way back so before it's over, before you run...didn't we have fun?"
♡ pairing: ilja dragunov x fem! reader
♡ note: not checked for grammar or spelling mistakes / i'm so happy ilja won tonight but that doesn't mean that i'm not heartbroken over walter finally losing. anyway, here's a small blurb for all you ilja stans.
"your ex has his big match tonight, you excited to probably see him lose again?" Indi asked jokingly. you rolled your eyes, not wanting to joke about a match you were nervous to watch. "I know tonight for him is a big deal so I don't really want to jinx him or for that matter, Walter," you replied, taking a sip of water.
Indi sighed sensing the excuses rolling off your tongue. you were tapping away nervously on your laptop and you filled out last minute paperwork for the pay-per-view event. she noticed every time you had your nose deep into your laptop it was for one of two reasons. you actually had to get work done or you were so nervous about something that you consumed your life with work until whatever it was that was making you nervous passed.
"what has you so glued to your laptop? I thought all NXT work was finished yesterday?" you shook your head, not responding as you continued to, "Regal wanted me to respond to a few emails for the taping on Tuesday. where's Dexter? I'm surprised the engaged couple isn't together right now," you poked, making Indi smack you on the back of the head.
the entire building was buzzing from excitement. you heard makeup and costume screaming at each other about finishing their clients so the other could get started. wrestlers walked back and forth through catering, chugging back water and standing by the curtains to eat while they watched whatever match was going on.
"look, Walter's over there," Indi whispered. you looked behind you, seeing Walter along with his two henchmen walking to an empty table. you could sense Walter's energy the minute he walked through the door. it was like the biggest unkept secret that Walter carried this energy that just scared anyone who dared to provoke him. "man, Ilja's going to get it rough, regardless if he wins tonight or not," you whispered to Indi as she agreed.
you and Indi remained talking to each other as you watched Dakota's match against Raquel. you were on the writing team for their storyline so you kind of had to pay attention to the match to see where it went after it ended. you managed to be so engrossed into it that you hadn't heard Indi calling your name for a good minute until she finally shook you.
"they want you in makeup and costume, something about Regal wanting you," Indi said. you nodded, closing your laptop and shoving everything int your bag, "I'll be back," you murmured. Indi laughed knowing you weren't exactly coming back anytime soon.
you walked as quickly as possible, not realizing that Regal had no business in makeup and costume but since your mind was so plagued with the thoughts of Ilja's match, you hadn't put two and two together.
once you arrived to makeup and costume, you saw Ilja sitting on one of the chairs as one of the makeup artist apologized profusely to you, "this was all Indi's idea. I swear she was the one who put me to this," she confessed as she walked out of the makeup stall, leaving you with Ilja, the air becoming thick.
"I know this isn't all of Indi's doing so what do you want?"
+
Ilja and you stared at each other, minds racing as the two of you heaved in anger, "I'm not staying on the UK brand, Lacey and I got offered a better deal as a tag team on the main NXT roster and I'm not just letting that go," you repeated to Ilja as he tried to grab your hand again. you quickly shook it off knowing that all he was going to do was try and convince you to stay again.
"why are you so against me going?" you asked again. this time, Ilja stood up, looking into your eye with so much intensity, "if you leave, I won't ever see you again. I won't leave the UK brand and you look like you're dead set on leaving it," you huffed knowing what Ilja was saying was true.
the offer NXT had for you in Florida seemed hell of a lot better than what the UK brand was offering you at the moment and teaming as a tag with Lacey didn't sound as bad as what you were currently doing. you grabbed Ilja's hand and rubbed it softly, "this might be the end for us but it's not all bad. you have a chance at the belt here while I try to go do the same thing just in Florida. maybe this isn't the end, just a see you later?" you asked knowing Ilja was trying to hold in his tears.
you knew Ilja was the kind of man who didn't hold back his emotions. he cried when he felt the tears coming but today he tried as hard as he could to hold it together, "we'll be together again, I promise," you whispered to him.
you felt your leg pulsing as you tried to calm your thoughts down. you had taken a nasty fall down during a match and you knew it was your ankle that had taken the hit or your achilles. a part of you was begging that it was your ankle but in the back of your mind, you knew it was your achilles and an achilles injury usually meant a prolonged healing process.
the medics tried to find the source of your injury but there wasn't much you could do while in the area. it didn't take long for them to wheel you into an ambulance and rush you over to the hospital to actually check out what was wrong. the entire time throughout the ride and waiting on your results, you kept getting a multitude of texts from everyone wondering what happened.
you heard a knock on the door and whispered a 'come in'. the doctor walked in with a pile of paperwork and wary smile. "what's the damage?" you asked, quickly cutting to the chase. he handed you the paperwork and while you could understand somethings, a lot of it was confusing.
"your achilles, it took most of the damage and it's an injury that you won't be coming back from."
your heart stopped hearing the news. you knew an achilles injury was pretty nasty but you never thought it would be the reason why your career ended. the doctor could see your face drop in complete sadness as you tried to hold back sobs. he knew it was best to not continue as you hid your face into your hands. no one thought that a random Tuesday night match would be your last.
Ilja sat on his bed, scrolling through his feed on Twitter when he heard the tweet from your account.
it was a photo of you holding the NXT UK Women's belt close to your heart. his heart sunk as he read the caption.
"didn't we have fun? don't say it was all a waste."
he quickly scrolled through your account to quickly come across the official WWE account. they had made an announcement that you were no longer available to wrestle due to your injury and Ilja knew more than anyone how hurt you must've been. you had moved your entire wrestling career to Florida in order to pursue the women's belt there and now, all of that was gone.
a part of him wanted to text you to make sure you were okay but he knew better than to do that. the two of you hadn't spoken since the breakup and texting you could bring back memories he was sure you didn't want back. a lot of your career was defined as a inter-gender tag team with him and that was how the two of you got signed together.
Ilja bit his tongue back and decided against texting you.
+
you watched the match from the monitors in the back. Ilja had said nothing to you when you asked what he wanted but he brought you in for a searing kiss. you were promptly taken back by his action but you let it happen, missing the way his arms hugged you and the way his intense eyes stared down at you.
Indi stood next to you as she saw you tapping against the table nervously. she knew you'd probably kill her later for making you reunite with Ilja but she knew better than anyone that the two of you belonged together. just like her and Dexter, you and Ilja needed to remain with each other. there was even a few wrestlers on the roster she had to scare away in order for her plan to work.
you saw the way Ilja's chest was turning red as Walter continued to chop at it, making it bleed and creating small cuts here and there. Indi stood next to you as she watched Ilja put Walter in a very easy chokehold. it wasn't one that seemed that Walter would falter too but it happened in an instant, Ilja had him wrapped so tightly that it seemed Walter was about to pass out.
"holy shit."
Walter was quickly tapping himself out of Ilja's grasp as the bell rang. Indi turned over to you to see the way you dropped your bag and without thinking, ran out of the curtains and onto the ramp. a few of the producers called your name to return but you were too far out to hear what they were saying.
the crowd was going wild to see you practically sprinting down the ramp. Ilja hadn't realized what was going on but you snatched the belt away from the ref and stood in front of him, holding it up high as Ilja tried to process what was going on. "you won, Ilja! you finally did it!" you yelled, shaking the belt in front of him.
Ilja's breath hitched as he grabbed the belt and held it tightly for a moment before putting his leg on top of Walter's chest, "you did it," you whispered to him. Ilja screamed in victory as you grabbed his hand and made him hold the belt higher to show the crowd that he had in fact dethroned Walter after 800+ days
you had no idea what this meant for you and Ilja going forward but you had the inkling feeling that somehow, someway, Ilja had crawled his way back into your life. not that you were complaining of course.
#wwe x reader#wwe imagine#wwe#nxt uk imagine#nxt#nxt uk#nxt imagine#ilja dragunov#ilja dragunov imagine#ilja dragunov x reader#fics#wrestling imagine#wrestling fic
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how to (not) be internet famous - peter parker
summary: peter parker becomes internet famous overnight and doesn’t exactly know how to deal with it, which causes him to end up in a precarious situation.
words: 4k
warnings: rien, mes amis!
a/n: part of the unsolved mini-series! just wanted to write a lil blurb w some world building before i go into more ghost/ghoul hunting. also goes without saying that this is minimally edited, sorry lol
unsolved masterlist | masterlist | add yourself to the taglist! | faq
Peter Parker did not intend on becoming famous.
It was quite literally an accident—a byproduct of being in the right place in the right time. But, completely out of his control, Peter Parker helped solved an Unsolved mystery.
It was one of Buzzfeed Unsolved’s most viewed episodes; the story of Peter Quill, a little boy who went missing right after his mother died. Of course, one theory was that he was abducted by aliens. That was the joke theory.
Until Peter Parker and Y/N Stark proved that theory to be correct.
Being fans of the show, the duo was vaguely aware of the existence of Peter Quill, the mysterious boy who went missing. It wasn’t until Thor traveled back to Earth with the rest of the Guardians did Peter and Y/N recognize Peter Quill.
Of course, their first instinct was to interview him about how he got abducted and ask about some space stories. Their next instinct was to invite Ryan and Shane of the Unsolved Network to interview him as well.
This subsequently made the internet blow up. And Peter Parker became famous because of it.
The video titled “We Solved A Buzzfeed Unsolved Case” garnered millions of views overnight, with thousands of comments flooding the video. Peter’s Twitter went from less than a hundred followers to more than a hundred thousand overnight, and his Instagram blew up in a similar fashion.
He was used to Spider-Man being famous, but Peter Parker had never gotten that much attention before. It was surreal.
He found himself sitting on the brown leather couch at the Avengers Tower (where the Stark family alose happened to reside) the morning after the video was released, staring at his texts blow up in front of him.
Ned: Dude you’re famous?? You’re on the YT trending page!!
MJ: can i meet ryan and shane? also warning: flash and brad don’t know you’re dating y/n so their texts may be a little hostile…
Flash: Damn Parker, how do you know Y/N Stark???
Brad: Why haven’t you brought Y/N around?
Betty: Peter you HAVE to let me interview you for the school news! When are you free??
“What the hell is going on…” Peter whispers, jaw unhinged as notification after notification caused his phone to ‘ding’ out of control.
“Hey Pete,” he hears a voice flow into the living room. His girlfriend walks past him, not before pressing her lips to his cheek. His cheek warms at the contact and his eyes follow her pajama-clad body into the large kitchen.
“Did you see the video you posted?” Peter calls after her. Y/N shakes her head as she throws a banana along with other frozen fruit into the blender.
“No…why?” she calls back. “Do you want a smoothie?”
“No, but thank you,” Peter replies quickly. He turns his body to face her and raises his voice at the sound of the blender turning on, “It’s trending. Like, everywhere.”
“I figured it would,” Y/N calls back, the hum of the blender drowning her voice out.
“How are you so chill?” Peter asks her, slightly bewildered.
“There was paparazzi in the hospital waiting room when I was bored. You get used to stuff like that,” she answers, before making her way back to Peter, smoothie in hand. She positions herself on the couch, placing her legs overtop Peter’s lap.
He places his arms over her shins instinctively. “I’m definitely not used to stuff like that,” he mumbles, still scrolling through his notifications.
Y/N scoffs, “You’re Spider-Man, honey. That comes with press.”
“Spider-Man is famous, not me,” he counters.
The sound of the elevator opening and deep voices conversing cut the couple off as they turn towards the door. Tony, followed by Steve, Bucky, and Natasha file into the common floor, all deep in conversation. They don’t seem to notice the young couple, so Y/N decides to make them known.
“Morning!” Y/N calls out.
Tony’s head snaps up towards his daughter, before shifting and narrowing his eyes at Peter. “We were just talking about you,” he says, walking towards the two.
“Oh?” the younger Stark challenges.
Natasha lets out a soft laugh before patting Peter on the shoulder. “You need a public relations lesson,” she says to Peter.
“A what?”
Y/N lets out a fit of giggles. “It’s to make sure you don’t say something stupid to a large audience,” she tells him, and Peter scrunches his nose.
“Why would I need a…oh.”
Tony smirks at him before showing him his ever-rising Twitter followers. “Yeah, oh. That video you posted basically broke the internet. Even old man Steve is talking about it.”
Steve rolls his eyes but smiles sympathetically at him before handing him a grey folder. “Protecting Spider-Man’s identity is still your number one priority, right?” Steve asks and Peter nods. “So, we need to make sure you don’t say anything stupid or post something that gives away who your alias is.”
“So, what’s in the folder?” Peter asks the adults in the room.
“Homework,” Natasha answers. “I’ll help make sure that your identity stays a secret, but I need you to make sure you read that document very carefully. They’re full of general best-practices and protocol for if your identity is exposed.”
“Got it,” Peter whispers, mostly to himself.
“Great,” Tony says with a pat to his shoulder. “It was a funny video, by the way. Can’t wait to see what you kids come up with.”
Over the weekend, even though Natasha, Tony, and Y/N prepared him as best they could for the storm that would most likely ensue on Monday at school, Peter still didn’t feel prepared.
He stood in the middle of his room, gnawing at his lip and choosing between the dark blue sweater and the maroon sweater. Granted, the sweater wouldn’t make that much of a difference and hide the fact that Peter was still a big nerd, but he had a feeling he needed to make a good impression today.
“Babe, you are overthinking it,” Y/N mumbles from Peter’s bed. Like most weekends, she spent the night at Peter’s place. Although things do tend to get a little heated, most nights the couple just watch movies, play video games, or take a walk around the block.
“You’re not the one going to a public school,” Peter mumbles back. It was true; Tony had tried sending Y/N to Midtown, but the paparazzi was getting unbearable, so she took online classes instead. Y/N didn’t mind missing out on the high school experience—her life was so surreal that nothing could make her feel normal, except Peter or Morgan.
“That wasn’t what I meant,” Y/N groans and rolls out of bed. She shivers at the cool breeze caused by the AC being blasted on high as she wraps Peter’s flannel around her body even tighter. “I meant that you’ll look really good in whatever you wear, honey.”
Peter rolls his eyes but turns to face his girlfriend, dark blue and maroon sweater still in hand. “I don’t know why I’m so nervous,” he admits.
“Afraid everyone will look at you differently?”
“Afraid everyone will think I don’t deserve someone like you…”
Y/N gives him a soft smile before closing the gap between them. She peppers kisses along his shoulder, his neck, then finally his lips. Peter ducks down to look at her, wrapping his arms underneath the flannel she’s wearing and around her waist.
“I love you, ya know that right?” she whispers into his collarbone.
Peter hums in response.
“And the world doesn’t get to decide who or what you deserve. Because you deserve a hell of a lot more than what I can give you.”
Peter groans, “Don’t say that. You give me everything I need.”
“And that’s what matters,” Y/N replies. “Not what anyone else thinks. Okay?”
Peter pulls away and gives his girlfriend a sincere smile, “Okay.”
“Good,” she muses before pressing a final kiss to Peter’s lips. She then takes the maroon sweater from his hands. “Wear the dark blue sweater, I want to wear the maroon one.”
---
Despite Y/N’s encouraging words, Peter’s still nervous.
He’s nerves kick in as soon as Y/N has to leave his place while he packs his school bag. He’s nervous on the subway on the way to school. He’s nervous as he crosses the street towards campus. He’s nervous when he’s walking toward the school entrance, so much so that he can hear his heartbeat over the podcast he’s listening to. And he’s especially nervous when people openly gawk and stare at him as he makes his way to his locker.
Luckily, MJ and Ned are there to save him.
“They’re all staring,” MJ comments as Peter yanks his locker open and reaches for his calculus textbook.
Peter laughs nervously, “I’m aware.”
“You know that clique of really hot sophomores who won’t shut up at lunch?” Ned adds on as he stares at his phone, “They’re all thirsting over you on Instagram.”
Peter slams his locker shut in surprise, “Wh-what?”
Sure enough, Ned’s phone is filled with screenshots of the video on Allison’s Instagram story with the caption ‘hmu peter ;) or i may have to fake needing a tutor to talk to you.’
Peter gags. MJ snickers.
“Oh my god, this is awful,” Peter shudders as he turns around and makes his way to first-period calculus. Ned and MJ follow suite. “Don’t they know I’m dating someone?”
“Peter, if we barely knew you were dating someone until we met her and started handing out with her,” MJ deadpans.
“Speaking of your girlfriend,” Ned butts in, “are you going to tell her about Allison?”
“No, she’d probably laugh. And it’s not a big deal, right?” Peter answer honestly, smiling slightly at the thought of Y/N laughing her ass off at the thought of sophomores at his own school acting thirsty on main.
Ned stops dead in his tracks, “What if she was actually talking to you?”
“Ned, what—”
“Hi, Peter!” a high-pitched voice attempting to sound sultry cuts him off.
MJ laughs in amusement before walking away as Peter squeaks out, “H-hi, Allison.”
Ned pats his shoulder encouragingly before walking away, giving Peter a ‘you’re on your own’ look.
She bats her eyelashes at him, giving him a shy smile. Peter’s distracted by her bright pink outfit—she looked straight out of an early-2000s movie. It suited her, but it wasn’t really Peter’s preference.
“I watched your video, it was really funny,” Allison says, inching closer to Peter.
“Thanks, um look, I gotta go—”
“You doing anything tonight?” she immediately asks.
No, Peter thinks, but he racks his brain for an excuse. May is working so he can’t use her, Tony is at the Avengers’ Compound, MJ has art class, Ned is working on a group project, maybe Y/N…
It’s too late. “Great!” Allison quips, “I’m having a party tonight and you’re invited, hottie. I’ll AirDrop you the details.”
“Uh, thanks,” he mutters pathetically as she practically skips away.
It wasn’t just Allison’s invitation that stuck out to him; it seemed like everybody more popular than Peter was giving him some sort of attention. If Peter didn’t know better, we would’ve been flattered. Instead, he was suspicious.
By lunch, Peter had been invited to three parties, a football game, a boat ride, and more invitations to hangout than he could count. Even Mr. Harrington made a jab at Peter’s internet fame.
As soon as the bell rang, Peter bolted out of his English class and ran out the front gates to take a breath. Even as Spider-Man, public events often felt overwhelming. Now, with no excuse to leave and no disguise to hide his flustered expression, the few minutes of silence he had at beginning of lunch was the only break he got all day.
“You don’t look too hot, babe,” he hears a voice say. From his spot leaning against the railing of the school entrance, he lifts his gaze and finds Y/N Stark staring up at him from the bottom of the stairs.
He stands up immediately and meets Y/N halfway down the stairs. He smiles widens as he gets close to her, “What are you doing here?”
“MJ texted me—said you were feeling overwhelmed,” she says nonchalantly, but concern laces her features. “You doing okay?”
“Just not used to so many people giving Peter Parker attention. And the feeling that they probably just want to hang out with me because they want to be famous makes me icky.”
Y/N hums and reaches for his torso to give him a hug. Peter is on the step above her, so he wraps his arms around her shoulders and rests his chin on her head. “I know how you feel,” she mumbles.
Peter laughs half-heartedly, “Got invited to a shit ton of parties, though.”
Y/N chuckles into his chest, “Oh really?”
“One of which is tonight. Got any plans?”
“Hmm…maybe,” she tells him. “Dad wants me to be his plus one to a gala thing, but I don’t really want to go.”
“You’d rather go to a shitty high school party?”
“I’d rather do anything, honestly.”
A honk from a car parked on the curb catches their attention. Peter looks up and finds Happy peering his head through the window of a black sedan. “Hate to break you two up, but I really don’t want to be swarmed by high schoolers,” Happy shouts, “so we should get going, Y/N.”
Y/N sighs, “And, that’s my cue.”
“I’ll see you tonight, maybe?” Peter asks hopefully, pressing a kiss on her forehead.
“Maybe. Text me the address, but don’t bail on the party,” Y/N tells him before giving Peter a proper kiss. Another honk from Happy causes them to break away, followed by the school doors opening and more and more people filtering outside. A series of shocked gasps at Y/N Stark and Peter Parker in such a compromising position prompt Y/N to start walking down the stairs.
“See you, Peter,” Y/N shouts as she quickly makes her way down the steps.
Peter waves to Y/N in the passenger seat as her and Happy drive away. His phone the buzzes with a text from Y/N:
Y/N 🥰: hang in there bb, love you!
“Yo, dickwad!” Peter hears Flash shout from behind him, “Why didn’t you introduce me to your Stark friend?”
Peter sighs. This was going to be a long day.
---
“You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.”
“I want to May…it’s just that—”
“It’s just that you want Y/N there?”
Peter sighs and shakes his head. He sits in the passenger seat of May’s car as she’s parked outside Allison’s house where the party is taking place. He’s beyond uncomfortable: the girl who was shamelessly flirting with him was sending him DMs, asking him when he was going to show up to her party. His skinny jeans—the nice ones saved for special occasions—were still a little stiff because he never really wore them, and he’s sure he’s made sweat stains on his white t-shirt.
“I guess, I just want the high school experience, to feel normal. Even if it’s a fake normal,” Peter says honestly, fiddling with his hair in the mirror. “But everything is easier with Y/N around.”
“Did she answer your texts?”
“I sent her the address and she said she would try to find an excuse to leave the gala early, but I don’t know if she’s gonna make it,” Peter says dejectedly.
May nods understandingly, “If you want to leave, just send me an SOS. I’ll come pick you up.”
“Thanks, May,” he says before pressing a kiss to her cheek. He doesn’t feel his body move, but his feet carry him out of the car and towards the front steps of the house. He doesn’t realize he’s reached for the door until he’s already inside, looking around at the darkened house illuminated by colourful lights and blaring with music.
“Peter!” he hears someone call from the top of the stairs. It’s Allison, clad in a sheer top, lacy bralette, and tight leather pants. He tries not to gawk at her, but he gulps in nervousness as she approaches.
“You made it!” she exclaims over the rumbling bass. Without warning she pulls Peter into a hug, pressing her body close to his. His muscles tense in surprise, but he feels Allison shiver.
Fucking great, Peter thinks as Allison eyes him up and down, biting her lip.
“Do you want a drink?” Allison says, latching onto his bicep and guiding him further into the house.
“Um, sure,” Peter says as he tries to remove his arm from her grasp while still remaining subtle. He fails, and Allison proceeds to run her nails up and down his arm.
Someone shoves a solo cup in Peter’s hand, and he takes a few big gulps immediately. His powers can’t get drunk, but he can sure as hell try if he has to handle Allison’s not-so-subtle advances towards him all night.
“I’m glad you came,” Allison suddenly whispers in his ear before biting his ear lobe in an attempt at seduction.
Peter whips his head around to confront her but before he can say anything, she’s left him to chat with her friends who have been watching the whole interaction in jealousy and awe. Great, Peter thinks before wiping his earlobe clean of her spit.
The party isn’t too bad; a few games of beer pong are going on the patio and people are taking turns jumping into the pool in just their underwear. Peter makes small talk with some people he recognizes, but for the most part, he leans against the wall and watches Flash pretend to be good at beer pong. Every few minutes, he checks the time on his phone and hopes for a text.
At 9:15, Peter has been at the party for forty-five minutes and is on his third drink. He still doesn’t feel buzzed.
At 9:24, Allison checks up on him again and tries to get him to strip with her and jump into the pool. He declines.
At 9:32, Flash loses his third game of beer pong in a row and a heard of angry freshmen finally scare him away from the table.
At 9:47, he hears excited commotion inside the house. He doesn’t bother to look inside and instead stares at the amber liquid in his cup.
He feels a hand fall on his shoulder, and he groans, finally fed up with Allison’s antics. “Look Allison, I think you’re sweet and all but—”
“Who’s Allison?”
Peter’s face breaks into a huge smile at the sight of Y/N Stark, still in her formal evening wear. The dark green, straight gown falls to the floor and the simple dress is bedazzled by nothing except the gold necklace Peter got her for her birthday and the million-dollar Stark smile.
“You made it,” he says in relief and excitement.
Y/N smirks back, “I’m overdressed.”
“You look beautiful.”
Y/N examines Peter’s outfit, “You look good too. This shirt makes your arms look huge.”
Peter blushes but takes a hold of her hands, only half-aware that half of the party is probably staring at them right now. “I didn’t think you were going to make it.”
Y/N laughs, “We were stuck in traffic. Dad wanted to get out of there too, it was pretty boring. We had to drop him off at home, first.”
“You left a boring party to come to another boring party, then. The difference is that you don’t get free dinner over here.”
Her laugh draws more attention to the duo and Peter finally finds the balls to look at the decent-sized crowd accumulating around them. He then notices a familiar face push through the people.
“Oh my god, you’re Y/N Stark!” Allison gushes as she approaches her, “Can I get a picture with you?”
Y/N smiles at her, “Um, sure?”
Allison squeals and shoves her phone into someone’s face, demanding them to take her picture. After a few photos are taken, Allison grabs her arms giddily and says, “You should totally follow me on Insta, these pics turned out really cute.”
Y/N looks amusedly at her, “Yeah, for sure…”
Allison then gasps, “You know Peter, too! We go to school together.” Allison then wraps her arms around Peter’s bicep and Y/N and Peter lock eye contact; Peter looks at Y/N in a state of panic and Y/N looks at Peter with nothing but amusement.
“Yeah, I figured,” she tells her, the amused expression growing.
Allison gasps again, “Peter! We should get a picture together too!”
Before he can really process it, Allison is pulling Peter close and shoving her phone in front of their faces. As Allison makes several different selfie faces, Y/N laughs softly as Peter smiles awkwardly at the camera. Suddenly, the feeling of lip-glossed lips touches his cheek and Peter raises his eyebrows in surprise and watches as Allison presses a kiss to his cheek in front of his girlfriend and what seemed like half the party. Her kisses trail down his neck, jaw, and ear before Peter finally gets over his initial shock and laughs awkwardly.
“Okay, um. That was kinda weird, Allison. You see, I’m ac—”
Allison juts her lip out and pouts, “But these were turning out so cute, Petey!”
Y/N Stark finally breaks out into a fit of hysterical laughter and both Peter and Allison turn to her with a bewildered expression.
“What?” Allison asks accusingly, thinking that she’s being mocked.
“Honey, he’s not interested.”
Allison’s jaw unhinges, “And how would you know?”
“Sweetheart, you’d be embarrassed if I told you.”
She scoffs. “Try me.”
“I’m dating Peter.”
Allison’s eyes bulge. The group of people watching the interaction gasp. Peter chokes on his own spit.
Allison’s face suddenly gets very, very red. “Miss Stark, I’m so, so sorry—"
Y/N holds out a hand to stop her rambling. “Don’t worry about it, love. If I wasn’t already dating him, I would be all over him, too,” she quips before grabbing Peter’s hand and leading him out of the party.
“E-erm, bye! Thanks for inviting me,” Peter calls back as Y/N leads him out of the house and towards the black sedan where the driver was waiting for the two to be done partying.
“All things considered, I would call that a pretty tame first fan interaction,” Y/N tells him as they walk towards the car. Her arm is wrapped around his torso as she leans her cheek on Peter’s shoulder.
Peter’s arm slings around her shoulders and looks down at her face. Her eyes twinkle in the moonlight and her features are light with amusement. “You’re not mad?” he asks her.
“Why would I be mad?”
“Because another girl was kissing me in front of you. And that you had to out our relationship.”
“Not a valid reason to be mad, to be honest. She didn’t know, and our relationship was bound to get out anyway.”
Peter laughs lightly, “You’re amazing, you know that?”
Y/N hums, “Yeah, I know. But so are you. And don’t worry, after a few weeks, the whole school will be a little chiller about your internet fame.”
A week later, Y/N and Peter uploaded a video where they went ghost hunting with Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes and it broke the internet yet again. Needless to say, the whole school was not very chill about it.
#peter parker imagine#peter parker x reader#tom holland imagine#tom holland x reader#peter parker#tom holland#unsolved#bf unsolved#wiener soldiers
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ours, for the rest of forever | ashton irwin
Hello friends! Here is a godparent!Ash one shot, based on this blurb about being godparents with Ashton and also inspired in part by that scene in Season 5 of One Tree Hill when Brooke is randomly looking after a baby but has to also finish fashion sketches so Lucas comes to her rescue with babysitting and it is overall very soft and cute. You know the one! Lol.
A very big thank you to Jex @sadistmichael , Anna @cheekysos , Jae @jae-writes-fanfiction and Hailey @talkfastromance4 for proof-reading and providing feedback on this when it was in its draft stages. You’re all absolute gems!
Anyway, enjoy the softness and as always, please let me know what you think! I’ve got some thoughts for a potential part 2, so we’ll wait and see how part 1 goes :)
(This is a fem reader insert)
Word count: 3.3k words
Warnings: none
More writing here | send feedback/thoughts/suggestions here
When your best friend Alice told you she was having a baby, you were over the moon. She was honestly one of the most kind-hearted people you knew, and the amount of love in her heart for others would only bloom more for a little baby to hold and cherish. Her partner James had been by Alice’s side since your university days, and their relationship was one that was literally #goals. They’d moved over to Los Angeles because James had an opportunity to work at an indie creative agency working with music artists, and when you followed a year or so later to pursue a consulting job, they’d welcomed you with open arms into the little community they’d formed of Australian ex-pats, LA creatives and generally good quality, salt of the earth people.
In the early days, there were lots of late nights (that became early mornings) running amok in West Hollywood, going from one house party to the next, but as you grew older, it became more likely to be a quiet Sunday sesh in someone’s backyard, with a barbeque cooking and someone playing their favourite tunes on a portable speaker while you floated in the swimming pool or lounged about on the grass with everyone’s various pets in attendance. When you met Ashton, he was drumming shirtless at his own house party, and then doing shots with James and their friend Calum. You were more than a little intimidated, although he had a kind face and welcoming nature, Ashton was forthcoming his opinions. On the other hand, you were always more reserved, and it took you time to feel like you belonged with their crazy crew of friends. One night, you and Ashton ended up alone in the kitchen sharing some chicken nuggets and potato gems tater tots after a wild night on the house part dancefloor, and from there you could feel a solid friendship starting to take hold.
A few months after Alice and James told you they were expecting, they’d invited you and Ashton out to brunch at one of your favourite spots. It was a little hole-in-the-wall café in Studio City that you’d first come to after Ashton wouldn’t stop raving about how good their iced coffees were. You all ordered your favourites (avocado smash with a side of smoked salmon and a hash brown for you, raspberry hotcakes for Alice, a breakfast burger for James, and pulled pork eggs benedict with a side of halloumi for Ashton) and were chatting away about your weeks at work when Alice reached down and pulled two envelopes out of her tote bag and handed on to you and one to Ashton. You took them, looking confusedly at Alice and James, who had big goofy smiles on their faces.
“Well, go on! Open them!” Alice half-shouted excitedly, squeezing James’ hand on top of the table. You and Ashton glanced at each other, perplexed, before tearing open the envelopes and finding a card inside. Yours read, “Will you be my godmother?” in gold writing on the front, and inside was an ultrasound photo with a handwritten note from Alice that made you tear up when you started reading it. You could see in your peripheral vision that Ash had a corresponding card in his envelope too, and he was standing up to give James and Alice a hug with an enthusiastic “Fuck YES! Of course I will!” that garnered some disapproving looks from the middle-aged women sitting near you. You held it together just enough to stand up and exchange hugs and choke out a “Y-y-yes” to Alice and James, before basically bursting into full blown tears of happiness and apologising profusely as your brunch was delivered to the table. As you wiped away your tears and managed to begin eating your avocado smash, you felt Ashton squeeze your hand reassuringly under the table, and when you glanced towards him he was grinning at you with a smile that was as bright as a thousand suns.
It was a normal June day at the office a few months later when your phone pinged with a text from Alice in your group chat with her, James and Ashton that
read “It’s go-time. We’ll keep you updated!”. You replied with lots of exclamation points and crying emojis, and for Alice and James to let you know if they needed anything, and a few minutes later Ashton had penned a full paragraph about the beauty of the creation of life, how he knew that Alice and James would be incredible parents, and that he couldn’t wait to meet the little one once they made their way into the world. Ashton was frustratingly eloquent sometimes. Later that night, you received a photo message of a small, pink baby snuggled up on Alice’s chest, with James’ arm thrown around her shoulders, and the caption “Charlie Rose, ten fingers, ten toes. Come visit tomorrow, she can’t wait to meet you x” and you could barely sleep from the anticipation of meeting your darling goddaughter for the first time.
Ashton insisted on meeting you at the hospital so you could visit Alice, James and Charlie together (“Dude, we’re a godparent team here! A package deal! A dynamic duo! Can’t have you getting in there as the favourite from day one!”) and you’d never seen him more gentle or smitten than when the small, wriggly bundle of blankets that was Charlie Rose was placed in his arms. Ashton rocked her gently, kissing her head, and whispering to her about how incredible she was and how excited he was to see her grow. James was snapping away with his camera, and he asked you and Ash to stand together for a photo holding Charlie, which would later be stuck on your fridge for years to come (and possibly be your phone lockscreen, but no need to mention that to Ashton).
Charlie was a tricky baby at first, resisting sleep and struggling with colic, but Alice and James were incredible and persistent and by the time she was 6 months old, they basically had the hang of this parenting thing. They didn’t want to christen Charlie in a church, but instead decided to hold one of your cherished backyard barbeques as a naming celebration for her. All of your nearest and dearest were there, and Alice’s mum had even flown in from Australia to meet her newest granddaughter. Despite it being an incredibly informal affair, Ashton insisted on making a speech about how he felt to be in Charlie’s life, to love and support her through every milestone and challenge she might encounter along the way. Charlie was happily gurgling in Ashton’s arms as he spoke, and she reached up to grab at his cheeks when he told her he loved her. Alice’s mum insisted on getting photos of everyone, including you and Ashton holding Charlie, and you tried to ignore the butterflies you felt when Ash slid his arm around your waist and pulled you into his side for a cosy photo pose. Were you actually starting to fall for him, or was it just the baby fever talking? Because damn, that man looked good with a baby in his arms.
When Charlie was almost 12 months old, Alice decided that she wanted to go back to work a few days a week. Charlie would be in childcare for most of the days, but you’d recently adopted a flexible working arrangement with your own office, and you insisted that you would love to look after Charlie for one day a week. The older Charlie got, the more adventurous she became, so what you’d originally envisioned as nice, quiet days of baking and craft activities and napping soon became full of visits to the playground and the beach and the zoo. Once Ashton heard about your regular babysitting day, he insisted on clearing his schedule as best he could, and joined the outings you and Charlie went on. It’s so much easier to cope with her boundless energy (and occasional temper tantrums) when you and Ash are together, and you have to admit it’s just as nice on the quieter days as well, when you snuggle in on your couch to watch a Disney movie, or do some puzzles with Charlie on the lounge room floor.
When Ashton was back out on tour, he’d insist on FaceTiming with you and Charlie on your babysitting day so he didn’t miss out on all the fun. Sometimes he’d read her a story or sing her a lullaby before naptime, and sometimes the timezones wouldn’t work out and he’d end up calling during naptime, so the two of you just spent a little time catching up on each other’s lives from your opposite sides of the country or the planet. Ashton also loved collecting little souvenirs for Charlie on his touring travels, and your group chat with Alice and James was regularly filled with photos of snow globes or little soft mascot toys he’d found in one city or the next. It was so cute how excited Ashton got when he found a new souvenir for Charlie, and you couldn’t help but imagine how adorable he’d be when he had his own children and carried on little traditions like this for them too.
One particular weekend, Alice and James were going away overnight to attend a friend’s wedding nearby, and despite their anxiety and nerves (and admittedly, your own), they decided to leave Charlie with you for the night as your house is the main one besides their own that she spends time in. They dropped Charlie off just after lunchtime, and after a teary goodbye, she’s soon happily playing with her toy cars and trains on the lounge room carpet (including making broom-broom noises, what a cutie) when you get an unexpected call from your boss. They’re rambling about a client needing an urgent rewrite on something that you’d submitted the previous day, a pretty sizeable project, and you could feel yourself starting to fill with dread at the idea of having to rework the entire thing while also keeping Charlie happy and entertained. After managing to jot down the gist of the rewrite on the back of a colouring in page you found on your coffee table and ending the call with your boss, you took a deep, calming breath before looking over to where Charlie was still playing on the floor. Sure, she looked content and adorable now, but nap time was fast approaching, and then dinner, and then eventually bedtime, and there was nothing Charlie liked more than stomping her feet and putting up a fight where sleep was involved. It was time to call for help, and your fingers found Ashton’s contact in your phone and hit “call” before you realised what you were doing.
“Hey, how’s it going with my favourite girl?” Ashton answered cheerily, and your heart stopped beating for a moment before you mentally face-palmed when you realised that he was talking about Charlie, not you, being his favourite girl.
“Hey Ash! All good so far, but um… I think I’m going to need some help. My boss is having a crisis, so I need to smash out some edits and new content in the next three hours, but Charlie’s due to go for a nap and you know that she -” You could feel yourself starting to sound more panicked with each word that you spoke, but Ashton quickly cut you off with his soothing voice.
“That she likes to pick a fight at nap time, yes. A truly assertive future world leader on our hands, I reckon. I’m just finishing up a demo, but I’ll be there in 20 minutes. I’ll sort dinner as well, spaghetti sound okay?” He mused, sounding as calm as ever.
“That… would be amazing. Thank you. You’re actually the best human to exist, you know that?” You gushed, feeling some of your anxiety immediately begin to disappear.
Within half an hour, Ash was in your lounge room handling Charlie’s nap time negotiations while you were furiously typing away at your laptop at the kitchen counter and fielding more frantic phone calls from your boss. Another 20 minutes passed before Ash proclaimed victory as Charlie lost her battle against sleep, and he came to see you in the kitchen and make a start on dinner. You were so lost in your task that you didn’t hear him come in, and you jumped a mile out of your seat in fright when he gently touched your shoulder in greeting.
“Jesus christ, Ash! Don’t sneak up on me like that!” You huffed, taking your glasses off and rubbing your eyes in exhaustion.
Ashton leaned on the counter opposite you and raised his eyebrows in concern. “Sorry love, didn’t realise you didn’t hear me come in. You good?”
Damn it, why was he always so nice to you these days? Remember the days when you were scared of him because he used to argue with you about politics and the state of the world? Why did those seem somehow easier because fear was more natural to you than whatever this other feeling was that you were starting to have whenever Ashton was around you.
You sighed and put your glasses back on, frowning briefly at the screen before hitting save one more time (just in case your bad luck took a turn and fucked you over with lost documents).
“Yep. Sorry. It’s just been a bit of a day. Did Charlie go down okay?” You forced a smile as you glanced up at Ashton over the top of your laptop screen.
“Yeah, she gave in once I offered another bedtime singalong. And maybe, juuuust maybe, I might have mentioned something about some sweets after dinner…” Ash looked at you guiltily, licking his lips nervously. You rolled your eyes and shook your head at him, but you couldn’t keep the small smile off your face.
Ashton got started on making spaghetti while you tapped away at your computer, and soon enough you heard Charlie calling out for Ashton in her little sing-song voice on the baby monitor you had set up on the kitchen counter (“Asht-aaaaa! Where are youuuuu! Asht-aaaaa!”). The spaghetti smelled incredible, and when Ashton brought Charlie into the kitchen from her nap and she’d had a little while to play a bit more, you settled at the kitchen table to tuck into some dinner. Well, Charlie was more interested in playing with her food than actually eating it, but yours was delicious and for the third or fourth time that day, you thanked Ash profusely for being such a gem (to which he just gave you one of those dazzling smiles in response).
After dinner, Ashton took Charlie for a bath and read her a bedtime story while you powered through the final part of the project edits you needed to finish before your boss burst a blood vessel. You could hear Ashton reading to Charlie on the baby monitor, doing all of the different character voices, and her little giggles in response were both breaking and warming your heart. Warming it with the cuteness and how much you loved that little girl and her cheeky soul, and breaking it with the guilt about how it was supposed to be you snuggled up reading to her, but instead you were frantically typing about key messages, marketing strategies and budget lines. You were doing your last section of re-writes when Ash came back into the kitchen, and this time you didn’t jump when he gently placed his hands on your shoulders. In fact, you leaned into his touch, and moaned quietly in relief as his thumbs began to work into the tension in your muscles.
“How’s it going?” Ashton asked quietly, continuing to press his hands into your back and shoulders.
“Almost there. Mostly just proof-reading now, and then I can send it and not fucking think about it for another second until at least Monday. Ash, I’m so sorry again, I know this isn’t what you had in mind for your Friday night and I should’ve been more organised but I just didn’t think that -” You began to ramble, feeling the guilt wash over you.
“Hey, hey. Stop. It’s fine. We’re a team, remember? The dynamic duo? Gotta stick together. We’ve got a whole lifetime of dealing with Charlie meltdowns and milestones ahead of us, love. It’s our job and our blessing, for the rest of forever. Don’t feel guilty over one night.” Ashton said softly, squeezing your shoulders and pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. There were those butterflies again, and your skin was almost burning from where his hands had touched you. You simply nodded at his words, before returning to your laptop and the task at hand. Ashton stepped away and quietly began washing the dishes (honestly, is there anything this man didn’t do?) as you began typing again.
Finally, about twenty minutes later, you hit send on the email to your boss with the completed rewrites, and shut your laptop with a deep sense satisfaction, letting out a triumphant whisper-yell, mindful of the sleeping child down the hallway from you. Ash looked up from where he was sat on the couch, scrolling on his phone, and rushed over to high-five you when he realised that you’d shut your laptop.
“Right. You go shower and I’ll put the kettle on, then it’s one episode of Sons of Anarchy and then off to bed with you.” Ash began, tugging you out of your seat and pushing you towards your bedroom before you could protest.
“Wait… how did you know I was watching Sons of Anarchy?!” You turned and asked, with one hand on the door to your bedroom.
“I was stalking through your Netflix earlier when you were lost in editing land. Plus, I know you can’t resist a charming male lead who has a killer smile and looks damn good in a leather jacket.” Ash chuckled, shooting you a wink and one of those goddamn smiles.
You hated to admit it, but you felt so much better after your shower, and having Ash pull your feet up over his lap and absentmindedly run his hands softly across your legs from time to time wasn’t exactly bad either. You stuck to your promise of only one episode of Sons of Anarchy, and after pulling your groaning self up off the couch and jokingly half-carrying you to your bedroom door, Ashton bid you goodnight with a hug and a kiss to the forehead before disappearing into your guest room.
As you settled into your own bed, alone, and pulled the blankets up over you, you couldn’t help but think how nice it was to have Ash so present with you and with Charlie, and how sweet it would be in the morning to wake up together in the same house and go for breakfast at your favourite little brunch spot down the street, before waiting for James and Alice to return in the early afternoon. It was all your own little family unit, and as you felt yourself being lulled into sleep, you also felt a deep sense of content in your heart about the loved ones in your life. And then also there were those butterflies, just slowly but surely making their presence known, and getting a little bigger every time you thought of Ashton, and how much he loved Charlie, and how much she loved him and you, and how much you loved them both.
Shit. Did you actually love him? Were you falling in love with Ashton Irwin? Before you could panic too much, the need for sleep won out, and you slept peacefully knowing two of your favourite people were also sleeping calmly in the rooms either side of you.
More writing here | send feedback/thoughts/suggestions here
#my writing#ashton irwin#ashton irwin one shot#ashton irwin imagine#ashton irwin blurb#ashton irwin fanfiction#5sos imagine#5sos writing#there's going to be a part two#charlie rose ten fingers ten toes#soft AF up in here on a saturday morning#also i fucking miss going to brunch with my pals that I based alice and james on
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flowers, maybe daisies, might relieve the gloom. - an a.i blurb
a/n: i lowkey blame @sexgodashton for starting this whole mini series of boomer!ash things, but i also adore this because boomer!ash is soft as hell. and also a lil d*ddy but we don’t need to talk about that. title is from wait by sweeney todd bc i love it. alternative title was gonna be from L.G. FUAD by motion city soundtrack
word count:
warnings: ashton irwin being a thirst trapping, lemon stealing whore. i’m kidding it’s just a solo ash fic w no smut but some mild ash thirst trapping.
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‘ashtonirwin started a live video.’
Ashton didn’t often go live on Instagram, but this shelter in place order had left him ultimately bored - writing a song every day before noon, sure, but anything after that was a blur. Occasionally he would have interviews or live-streams with the band, but on days without that he was left alone with his thoughts, and his thoughts weren’t always the safest place to be; so talking to fans it was.
It was going well so far, simply asking fans how their quarantine was going - bringing some of them into the livestream so he could talk to some face to face. One girl in particular had caught his attention when they began to discuss hobbies she had picked up during the time she’d spent at home.
“Yeah, I’m learning to garden. I have a tomato plant that is just starting to sprout actual tomatoes, so that’s kind of exciting,” She had said, a nervous laugh escaping.
“Well, I would hope that your tomato plant is sprouting tomatoes, it would be a little concerning if it was growing something else,” Ashton replied with a chuckle, the girl giving a small shrug but still laughing along with him.
“You should look into it if you’ve got the room at your house, I bet it would feel rather rewarding to be able to cook something with your own fresh vegetables.”
“Would save me quite a bit of money too. Can I grow yeast? I’d like to learn how to make my own bread but here in L.A. you can’t find yeast anywhere.”
The conversation continued like that for a few minutes more, Ashton taking only a couple more fans into the livestream after that to talk to before he decided he should probably do something else productive with his day. Something like learning to garden.
It surprised Ashton the things you were able to order online during this time - soil being the main thing. He also read that saving coffee grounds would help, and he was excited at the idea of his insane coffee habit wouldn’t be completely useless. He ended up buying seeds for tomatoes, mint, sunflowers, lemongrass, and zucchini. The lemongrass and mint was specifically for Calum, realizing he would be able to dry the plants out once he had harvested them so he could make the man his very own tea.
When his package finally arrived, Ashton spread the packages out, sliding them across the table as though he was some card dealer in Las Vegas. Thinking the fans would find it amusing, he took a picture of the spread and added it to his story with the caption of ‘pick a card, any card…’. Maybe it would only be funny to him, but it did prompt a fire reaction from Michael.
It seemed as though the reaction from fans were positive though, them taking to Twitter to let him know their excitement about his new endeavour. That’s where his weekly livestreams began. He would show everyone the progress he was making with his plants, and just in general him chatting with fans. Ashton never really thought of how refreshing it could be to just talk to the fans, without the worry of time restrictions or anyone’s personal safety in the way; in fact, it left him rather inspired, loving their fans even more if it were at all possible.
A particularly warm day in L.A. left Ashton wondering if he should go out to the garden that day - but it was the day he would normally livestream, and he was excited to show what he was up to that day. Ashton wanted to plant another tomato plant, and also the lemons on his infamous tree had enough for him to make some lemonade so he was going to go through that as well.
Clad in some cut off jeans, or as Calum so affectionately called them his jorts, and a white tank top, he pulled up the live option on Instagram and waited for the people to begin to filter in before he started to speak.
“Hey guys! Just gonna wait for more of you to filter in before I actually head outside, but I thought that since you guys love my lemon tree so much, I’d make some lemonade. Fuck, I sound like a YouTuber. Is that gonna be my next career, is just YouTube tutorials on how to make shitty lemonade?” Ashton laughed to himself, slicing the lemon so he could juice it, ignoring the comments he saw about murdering his lemon children.
It didn’t take him long to make the lemonade, making mild conversation with the fans while he stirred in a little bit of sugar and some cheat mint he had ordered while waiting for his own to grow.
“Alright, now that I’m waiting for that to cool, probably best we go outside and check on those tomatoes, hm?”
It had been weird at first, talking to himself; but he quickly realized that he talked to himself anyways, even without the phone in front of him, so it couldn’t have been too weird for anyone who could overhear him.
“So I wanted to plant another tomato plant today, because everyone can use a friend right now, you know?” He looked into the camera, a smile spreading across his face when he saw the flood of cute little emojis that followed. “M’gonna be like the Bob Ross of gardening. No mistakes, only happy accidents or whatever it was he said.”
Ashton began to work away at his garden, building up a sweat in the process. It wasn’t until he leaned back, glancing at his phone did he see a text from Michael flash across the top.
‘Mate, Crystal said stop thirst trapping the fans.’
Ashton’s brow furrowed, unsure of what the text was saying, “Okay so I just got a text from Michael - what’s thirst trapping? And am I currently doing it?”
Of all the comments that followed, he noticed one that said ‘I mean… I’m not gonna say either way but take a look at yourself and get back to us’. Another one told him that it was when someone wears something in order to provoke risque texts, or gain attention from someone.
Ashton pouted, looking down at his appearance. He was kind of sweaty, but he didn’t think that the fans would mind him being covered in dirt and sweat, it’s not as though they had to smell him. Though, he would admit that he needed a shower.
“Well, since my tomato plant has been… planted next to its’ friend, and I’m apparently thirst trapping you all, I should probably go shower and clean up. Is me mentioning a shower thirst trapping as well?” Ashton rubbed his face over his hands, a small huff leaving his lips, “I don’t know… Fellow youths, tweet me and lemme know. Also, may hold a poll later on what to name these guys.” He flipped the camera around, struggling for a moment, to show the sunflowers that were starting to sprout, “M’thinking of naming one Denise. Just seems like a Denise.”
After his small speech was over, he ended the stream, grinning to himself. He hadn’t meant to show off his body in such a way, but it was funny to know that even with him hardly doing anything but be himself they still lost their shit.
Glancing around at his garden, he felt himself swell with a mild sense of pride. He was still a ways off from seeing any fruits of his labour (literally), but it made him feel good knowing he did something with his time at home, instead of slipping further into his mind which wasn’t always the kindest to him.
Ashton realized that when he was gardening, it was similar to songwriting in a way where all of his self doubts and fears went away and he could just pour himself into it - the reward being well worth the risk in the end.
Once his shower was done, he sat outside in his backyard, sipping his lemonade and enjoying the sunshine - realizing that having to stay home wasn’t all too bad, if it meant he could reset his mind, and do some small part to help how he could during that time.
tag list: @haikucal @talkfastromance4 @softbabiestan @boyfriend-cal @calum-uncrowned @wildflowerirwin @irwindoll @gosh-im-short @thesubtweeter @heavenisapeach @ridingcthood @loveroflrh @mantlereid @inlovehoodx @irwinkitten @n-ctarinenga @g-l-pierce @thecurlsofgod
#ashton irwin#ashton irwin blurb#ashton irwin fluff#ashton irwin fanfiction#5 seconds of summer fanfiction#boomer!ash
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Hmmmm are you still taking requests? Yes? No? For me pleaseeee?? 😁 (don't mind me I need more sleep lol)
Please don't hate me for this but... pick any prompt you want to write..for Jake debrusk (👈 is your fault..I dont even like the bruins lol)
Congrats on 700! You deserve it 😁😘
Ugh LOVE you so much you tags always make me smile
Don’t get mad at me but someone requested prompt 23 and said pick the boy, so I made my life a little easier and combined the two
23. It’s cold today.
happy blurb weekend :)
Winter is by far the superior season in your opinion. You felt most confident when you were wearing cute layers. The best fashion was winter fashion and no one could tell you otherwise. The best food came during the winter: hot chocolate, warm, homemade soups, the holiday cookies in December. And then there was the snow. The white frozen water that fell from the sky, blanketing the city, canceling everything, was the best thing in your opinion.
The first snowfall of the year had you bouncing up and down like a child by the window, Jake watching you from the couch in amazement that someone could actually like the cold as much as you did.
“Can we please go to the Commons and have fun in the snow?” you ask him, throwing yourself on the couch next to him, causing him to spill some of his water on his chest.
“Ah, babe,” he whines, putting his glass on the table. “It’s cold today.”
“Yeah, and? It’s New England. We only have two seasons: winter and August, and it’s not August. Can we please, please, please go play in the snow?”
He groans, clearly not thrilled with the idea. You flash him your puppy dog face, knowing that he will say yes to anything you ask of him when you give it to him. “Fine,” he groans, pulling you up off the couch to go put on the proper attire, “But you owe me big time.”
“I will do anything you want for the rest of the night if we can go be idiots in the snow for a few hours,” you tell him, dragging him to your bedroom.
“I’m holding you to it.”
You drag him to the Boston Common, finding it already covered with people having snowball fights, making snow angels, building snowmen. You take his hand in yours, kissing his cheek before dragging him directly into the snow. “I love you so much for this.”
The two of you start building a snowman, the perfect sculpture that you top off with Jake’s hat from the Winter Classic a few years back. He takes a picture of you, your cheek almost touched the cold snow, lips pursed and your eyes closed, captioning it ‘ice, ice baby,’ knowing that the guys would flood the comments with chirps. He posts the photo, putting his phone in his pocket. He smiles at you, biting his bottom lip as he slowly walks toward you, one of his hands behind his back.
“What are you doing?” you ask, backing away from him.
Without a word, he launches a snowball at you, hitting you directly in the face. You shriek, gathering up snow to fire back at him, starting a mini snowball fight between the two of you. He lifts you up off the ground, spinning you around before bringing you back down to kiss you, his lips warm against your now frozen skin.
“Thanks for amusing me.”
“Thanks for making me come outside.”
#jake debrusk#jake debrusk imagines#boston bruins#boston bruins imagines#bruins#bruins imagines#nhl#nhl imagines#hockey#hockey imagines#hey don resign our himbo
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You’re fuck toxic masculinity blurbs 🥺🥺 could you write another one maybe putting on glitter on Cal and you wearing it too to pick up Aiden and Logan from school? Like how Sierra did it with Luke? You can add whatever else I just think that’s a cute concept, thank you!
Fuck toxic masculinity at all times!!! When Sierra did Luke’s makeup, that was pretty amazing. Calum wearing makeup has me feeling things 🥰🥰🥰🥰
Now that both Aiden and Logan were in school full time, the days you weren’t working could get really boring, really fast. After Calum had taken Aiden and Logan to school, you had cleaned the entire house, started the laundry and even cleaned up the backyard from when the guys and their girlfriend’s came over the night before. The most unfortunate part, was you accomplished all of that before Calum even got back home. When Calum opened the door, he looked around and pulled his eye brows together. He found you in the kitchen, leaning against the counter scrolling through your phone. “You cleaned the house already?”
You looked at the time on your phone, not realizing he had only been gone for an hour. Your face dropped and you dropped your phone to your side. A groan fell from your chest as you rolled your head around, “It’s only been an hour? How the hell has it only been an hour?” You stomped being slightly frustrated with yourself being overly efficient.
Calum laughed and snaked his arms around your waist, pressing a gentle kiss to your nose. “Well, since all of the chores are done, what should we do now?’ His voice lowered, trying his hardest to be seductive, which for some reason always made you laugh.
Not this time, though. You had all day to mess around, and all day to do whatever you wanted, wherever you wanted. A fire in the pit of your stomach ignited and you stood on your toes to press a heated kiss to Calum’s lips. His hands gripped your hips tighter as you ran your hands down his chest and stomach to the bottom of his t-shirt. The only time you pulled away from his lips was to pull his t-shirt over his head. Once his t-shirt hit the ground, he bent and grabbed the back of your legs and carried you out of the kitchen and to the living room.
Once you were done in the living room, you both moved into the bedroom for one more round before you both felt the need to just relax. Calum was laying on the bed, one hand laying across his stomach, and the other arm tucked under his head. He had pulled on a pair of gym shorts, but hadn’t bothered to put a shirt back on. Especially since you had pulled on a pair of underwear and the only t-shirt that was close to you, which happened to be the one Calum had his eyes set on. Across the room, you caught sight of your makeup vanity and you looked at Calum as a smile spread across your lips. “Can I do your make up?” Calum opened his eyes and looked at you, expressionless for a full thirty seconds. As if he were thinking about the pros and cons of you doing his makeup, he finally nodded.
You squeaked out some excitement as you grabbed his hand and pulled him over to your vanity. As Calum sat down in the chair, you sat on the top of the vanity, facing him. He ran his hands up your bare thighs and bit his bottom lip. Goosebumps shot up all over your skin as you giggled and put your pointer finger under his chin. He looked into your eyes, his eyes wide with pleading. You kissed him and shook your head, causing him to nod. He dropped his hands from your thighs as you turned to grab the first item of makeup and a brush.
As Calum sat patiently for you to do his makeup, he recorded a small clip of you pressing glitter to the sides of his eyes. He smiled and raised his eyebrows at the camera, no words were said. You paused doing his make up to let him post the video, captioning it with “’What do parents even do when their kids are at school?’ This.” As soon as the video posted, his phone started to blow up. He shut his phone off and looked back up at you, smiling at you as if you were the only thing on this planet that he cared about. You kissed him again before applying the sparkly lip-gloss you had picked out.
Calum changed into a plain black shirt, and a sparkly blazer that just happened to match his makeup. You took a video of him showing off his new look and laughed at his silly poses. By the time you were finished having a miniature fashion show with him, it was time to leave and go get Aiden and Logan. There was barely enough time for you to change out of your lazy clothes, let alone time for Calum to take the makeup off. “I can bring makeup wipes with us?” You asked as you threw your bag over your shoulder.
Calum pouted and shook his head. “I’m fine, I’m actually a big fan of my new look.” He smirked and you lifted your hand to push a lock of his hair out of his face before heading out the door and to the car.
Aiden and Logan came out of the front doors together, they were holding hands, something you had taught them to do so that if anything happened, at least they were together. You shook your head remembering that that was the type of thing you had to teach your children. When you looked at Calum, he had a big smile on his face and he was moving in a way that all of the sequence on his blazer was catching the sunlight. He moved his sunglasses off his face and squatted as Aiden and Logan approached him. Aiden was giggling, and Logan just looked confused. “What’s on your face, daddy?” Logan said, pointing at the glitter by his eyes.
“Mommy put all this on me so I could look pretty when picking you guys up from school.” Calum explained while reaching out and tickling Logan’s tummy. You could see the look Calum was getting from other parents and some of the older kids, but Aiden and Logan didn’t care. “Don’t I look good?” Calum asked raising his eyebrows and pointing to his face. Both boys nodded and giggled. “I think so too, let’s get home so we can have snacks and watch some cartoons.” Calum stood up and reached for Logan’s hand while you reached for Aiden’s hand.
As you walked back to the car, you leaned towards Calum and asked, “You can hear the people whispering about you, right?”
Calum shrugged and looked around him, “Of course I do, but I don’t care.” While still walking towards the car, Calum looked down at Logan and Aiden, “Listen to me, kiddos, don’t let anyone tell you who you should and shouldn’t be. If you want to wear makeup like me, then wear makeup, okay?” Both Logan and Aiden nodded and you smiled at Calum, nobody was going to tell any of the Hoods who they should or shouldn’t be.
***********
Tag list: @mantlereid @notinthesameguey @viiirg0 @wheniminouterspace @thinkofmehlgh @another-lonely-heart @limer-encia @itsmytimetoodream @babyoria @treatallwithkindness
#asks#anon#requests#The Hood Family Adventures#dad!cal#dad!calum#dad!calum hood#dad!sos#calum hood#Calum Hood blurb#Calum Hood oneshot#Calum Hood imagine#Calum Hood fic#Calum Hood fan fic#Calum Hood fan fiction#Calum Hood writing#Calum Hood x reader#Calum Hood 5 seconds of summer#Calum Hood 5sos#reader insert#calum#calum blurb#calum oneshot#calum imagine#calum fic#calum fan fic#calum fan fiction#calum 5 seconds of summer#calum 5sos#calum x reader
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First Instagram
Summary: Tom visits you in New York before heading back to London, and you two go public.
Warnings: fluffly fluff fluff, feelings, smut (a wee bit)
Word Count: 1.8k
A/N: I know I said these would be blurbs but apparently I don’t know how to write short things, peep the rest of the series in my masterlist (linked in bio). Enjoy!
“Missed you,” Tom says, face nuzzling into your neck in the doorway of your apartment, bag forgotten on the floor.
“Missed you too, how are you? How was California?” You ask, pulling him into your apartment.
“It was so great, had a really good time on the talk shows and interviews and such. I know you gotta catch up on the movies but I think you’ll like this one,” he says, detaching his arms from your waist for a second to grab his bag and close the door behind him.
“You know, I watched Spiderman Homecoming, the other day,” you say as Tom’s arms wrap back around your waist. You squeal as he lifts you up, kissing you as your arms steady yourself on his shoulders.
You missed Tom, you missed his voice, you heard it often on FaceTime and through calls but something about having him here, in person, was almost like a sensory overload.
His warmth, his scent, his voice. His everything.
“Wanna see your tattoo!” Tom all but shouts against your lips, his eyes lighting up like a kid on Christmas as he sets you down and you take his hand in yours, guiding him to your bedroom and tugging down your shorts nonchalantly as you sit on the bed.
His eyes grow impossibly wider and his lips turn up into a smile, his tongue between his teeth as he kneels on the ground.
You sit up with your arms resting behind you, shivering as his hands rest on your knees, spreading your thighs further.
It wasn’t sexual, sure, it’s been a solid three weeks or so since you’ve seen him and you couldn’t wait to ride him until you couldn’t anymore, but there was an innocent twinkle in his eyes as they roam up your thigh to the small Spiderman face resting on the outer edge of your upper thigh.
“Can I touch it?” He asks, big brown eyes looking up at you, gentle fingers gliding around it.
“It’s still healing, you can touch it the next time you see me sport.”
“Sport?” He laughs, cheek resting against your thigh.
“I’ve been, ahh,” you gasp as his lips trail up your leg, leaving soft kisses in his wake, “I read the Great Gatsby, sport.”
“Isn’t that what Gatsby calls Nick?” He asks, and you don’t even realize his lips are inches away from your red lace panties until you look down at him.
“Yeah, Nick has a huge gay crush on him.”
“That’s not in the movie.”
“What? Tobey McGuire does a pretty good job at it if you ask me,” you say, voice softer now as his hands rest on your hips, fiddling with the band of your underwear under your Tattoo Dice T-shirt.
“I guess the book might be different,” he sighs.
“You could listen to the audiobook of it,” you suggest, knowing he doesn’t like reading.
“Maybe I’ll give it a try, sport.”
You collapse, literally onto the bed in a fit of giggles, which pulls Tom to laugh against you, the vibrations against you making you moan.
“What’s so funny?” He asks as he climbs onto your bed, wincing as it squeaks underneath both of your weights.
“No, just, funny, having a casual conversation while you’re sitting like that between my legs.”
“I quite enjoy being between your legs,” he smirks, nose nudging your hair out of the way so he can kiss your neck.
After a few heated rounds filled with passionate kisses, miss you, miss you more’s, and several orgasms, you collapse on top of Tom, his fingers drawing patterns on your sweaty back as you both catch your breath.
“Harry wants us to go to the Coney Island place with him tonight.”
“It’ll be packed.”
“Yeah,” he sighs, lips ghosting along yours.
“And people will know who you are.”
“Mhm,” He mumbles against your lips, tongue gently meeting your own.
You kiss lazily for a few minutes as you think.
You could go with them, get noticed with Tom, everyone would know you’re a couple. They’ve already seen pictures of you leaving the club that fateful night, but nothing was ever confirmed, nothing was ever brought up again really. But as you kissed, eyes peeking open and looking at the beautiful man underneath you, feeling his strong arm around your waist, his cool fingers against your back, you thought, what the hell?
You pull away from his lips, “let’s do it.”
“Yeah? We can tell people we’re boyfriend and girlfriend?” He asks, voice rising in excitement.
“Yeah dork, we can tell people you’re my boyfriend, now let’s shower and get ready, I wanna meet your brother.”
***
“So this is the very special girl Tom talks about, nice to meet you,” Harry grins as the two of you get into the car. You insisted the subway would be easier but Tom said Harry hated the feeling of the New York City subway.
“Well you’re not living until you’ve been shoved up against a million people in the subway,” you laugh but agree, this was much nicer.
“Ever been to Coney Island?” You ask and Harry shakes his head.
“It’s on my bucket list to try the hotdogs there, What’re they called?” Harry asks, camera hanging out the window.
“Nathan’s? They’re the best,” you sigh, head resting against the window on your side, Tom’s hand resting on your thigh, drawing smiley faces into your thigh around the Spiderman.
“Harry I expect like a million photos of tonight, gotta find one worthy of Instagram,” you say, and the brothers laugh.
“Don’t worry, I document like everything, you’ll get plenty of teeth rotting cute pictures of the two of you,” Harry teases and you all laugh.
On your way in to get tickets for rides, a few people recognized Tom and you happily stood back and watched as he took pictures with the fans, talking to them animatedly about the movie.
“This happen a lot?” You ask Harry as he takes pictures of the sunset.
“All the time,” he laughs.
The rest of the night is much of the same, you’re grateful nobody’s decided to mob you.
Harry practically drools over the hot dog.
You and Tom go on the Cyclone, an old wooden roller coaster, Harry hangs back to take some pictures of the nightlife.
As you are strapped into your seat your hand grips his arm tightly.
“I’m not scared,” you say straight away.
You were.
“Oh good, because I’m a little scared,” Tom laughs, hand covering your own.
You glance at him and he’s got a frightened little smile on his face and he might actually be scared.
“Alright, we can be scared together,” you laugh as the coaster starts to move.
And you grip his arm right and you’re both screaming and laughing the entire way. You glance over once during the ride as you go up one of the larger peaks, the sun was setting but it shone across Tom’s face, illuminating his slight tan and the few freckles that dotted his cheeks. He looked beautiful, and you wanted to shout it from the rooftops for the whole world to hear.
“You’re beautiful,” you whisper as the coaster pauses at the top.
“Huh?” He asks, eyebrow quirked as he looks at you.
“I said,” you start before the coaster tips and you’re falling, fast and hard, heart thudding against your chest, dropping down the jump and screaming, Tom’s screams a comfort to your ears.
As you race along the track back to where you started your grip doesn’t lessen, you’re still falling. Thud thud thud, goes your heart.
Oh.
“You’re beautiful,” you say, wriggling your eyebrows as you unfasten the restraints from the ride.
“Why thank you, darling, shall we go find Harry?”
You nod, and he helps you up, hand clasping in your own, swinging between you as you walk out of the ride area.
***
Tom and you are playing at one of those carnival games, where you toss the darts and if you pop a balloon, you win a prize. He at first tried to insist that he could win it for you, that huge stupid teddy bear on the top shelf.
After a few tries he let you play with him and you joke that you’ll win in one go. You don’t.
“Alright, you guys tried your best, how about pick anything from the bottom shelf?” The man running the booth says, gesturing to the small teddy bears and trinkets.
“Whatcha think princess? You want the teddy bear?” Tom asks, hands wrapping around your waist and chin resting on your shoulder as you look over the prizes you could get.
“I think so,” you nod, and the man grabs one for you, handing it to you.
You hold it tight to your chest, “what’s his name?”
“Hmm, why don’t we name him sport?” He laughs and you gasp.
“It’s perfect!”
“Can we go check out the water?” Harry asks.
“My feet hurt from walking everywhere,” you grumble, hoping to call it a night.
“Here, your chariot awaits,” Tom says, turning around and holding his hands out.
“What you want to do? Give me a piggyback ride?”
“Hop up princess,” he says and you grip your new teddy bear tighter in one hand as you jump, his hands catching your thighs with ease as you grip his shoulders.
“I’m not killing you am I?” You huff as he starts to walk.
“Nope,” he assures you, thumb rubbing your thigh as he walks with Harry down to the water.
“Wait wait wait!” Harry shouts, running in front of you.
“What is it?” Tom asks, coming to a halt.
“This is a really cute picture, now act natural,” he says as he clicks away.
“Wait! We need one with sport!” You say, pulling the light yellow teddy bear out and sitting it on Tom’s shoulder as your head rests on his.
“Look over there!” He says and his hand moves from under your thigh to point at something, causing you to slip and let out a small scream, his hand scrambling back to catch you.
Harry erupts into a fit of laughter, hunched over, pointing at the photo he just got.
Tomholland2013: pretty great night visiting my girl, sorry for almost dropping you sport
Attached was a teddy bear emoji. Tom’s caption made you laugh through your sleepy haze on the way back to your apartment.
He had chosen the picture Harry caught of your mouth wide open in a scream, his eyes wide in horror as he readjusts his grip on your leg, your newly won teddy bear dangling from one hand as the other clutches his shoulder when he almost dropped you. There were a few other photos Harry snagged, of you walking hand in hand, of his chin resting on your shoulder as you picked out the teddy bear, but this one by far was the funniest and the most memorable.
“Should I tag you?” Tom asks, cheek resting on your shoulder as his hand hovered over the tag button.
“Sure,” you figure what harm could tagging you do? You were already in a million photos taken by what seemed like every person at Coney Island.
“Done,” he says, posting the photo and turning his phone off. Your eyes watch as his fingers trace along your palm, along each crease, up to your fingers, dancing along them before finally intertwining with yours.
Thud. Thud. Thud.
Falling fast.
#tom holland#tom holland smut#tom holland x reader#tom holland x fem!reader#tom holland reader insert#tom holland fluff#tom holland oneshot#tom holland fic#tom holland series#tom holland x reader smut#tom holland x you
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Hello friends and fans!
Welcome to my 45th newsletter – September 2020!
On A Personal Note
August was a blurry month – it really doesn’t feel like September, it feels more like March the 342nd! Know what I mean? Anyway, between work and everything else I have going on the side, the last six months or so have literally disappeared! For most people, this year has been a complete loss, for me I’ve at least published 7 new titles. Not to brag, but this brings my tally up to 30 books!
On the home front, my workshop is where I indulge my creative side in wood and metal work. Some years ago however, I got sick and tired of sharing my workspace with the rest of the garage! When it rained, it meant I couldn’t run my vintage bug outside, and the small space available meant I wouldn’t be able to work in there that day! About two years ago, I built a greenhouse against the side of the house across the alleyway between the house wall and the boundary wall, bordering on the back garden, which in the end my love convinced me to use as a workshop space instead! For the past two years, this has been where I worked on various projects, regardless of the weather. The only problem with that was again, space. While I had more permanently accessible space to keep my tools and to work, quite a lot of my tools were actually kept in shelving under the work benches. I needed more space – or to be more specific, a broader room to work in.
So, finally, last week I finally gave up on the bar area. It was where we entertained friends and it consisted of an actual bar room with an adjoining dining area with casual benches and a table for when we had barbeques etc. It’s been a considerable amount of time since we’ve entertained anyone who drinks, and neither of us actually drinks much more than a brandy now and then – scarcely enough to warrant wasting the useful premium real-estate on a bar! It would be far better to just dedicate a cupboard inside the house to housing the drinks, glasses and accoutrements – and all my collectibles, antique cameras and telephones etc. on the walls could be redistributed around the rest of the house.
That said, Wendy could have her greenhouse back – and so last week I relocated my workshop to the larger space where I have more room to work on projects and store and organize my tools and materials! For the first time, I feel I actually have the right space to indulge my creativity! The adjoining stoop will still be reserved for chats, game nights and barbeques – should they ever arise again.
Aside from that little personal ramble ,I also have some very good writing-related news to share with you this time – another two of my books have come out as audiobooks, and I’ve also published a new novelette called “Lifetime”! Moon Books also released an anthology I was the Editor for, so it’s really been a productive year for me so far!
Art
I also indulge in painting from time to time – and no, I don’t mean walls! The following paintings are in my portfolio:
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“Human Nature” 2017 A4 acrylic canvas
“Balancier” 2020 A2 acrylic canvas
“Rescuer” 2020 A2 acrylic canvas
“The Awakening” 2020 A2 acrylic canvas
“The Earth Wept” 2020 40x40cm acrylic on canvas
You can read more about my art projects on the Art page.
What do you think of them? Feel free to let me know!
Music
Yes – I also make music from time to time!
A selection of music tracks I made using eJay and other similar apps between 1999 – 2008 are available on my YouTube channel.
You can read more on the Music page on my website!
Activism
For those of you interested in my activism-related posts and activities, you can follow them at “Sour Grapes: The Fruit Of Ignorance“.
Current Writing Projects
On a suggestion of Brandon Mullins from Moon Books, I agreed to a combined edition of “Duck Blind” and “The Next Room”, to replace the two novellas published in February this year. The new book is novel length at over 46000 words, and I also wrote a short foreword and an introductory portion to precede the first part of the story.
As I mentioned several times previously, I have still a lot of work to do! I have a number of part-way completed stories awaiting my loving attention! Unfortunately, life and work have a nasty habit of getting in the way!
Also, thanks to Lulu.com’s spite in throwing their entire publishing platform into a mincer and expecting users to just shut up and like it, I have left the platform entirely – but aside from the immense amount of work that precipitated on my side with having to relocate all my books from there to other platforms, it also means I’ll have to rebuild one of my books entirely from the ground up! “The Pitfalls of South African Self-Publishing” is now out of print thanks to Lulu. Why? Because the second half of the book details the ease of self-publishing using Lulu’s old platform – the one they entirely scrapped and replaced with a vague, useless monstrosity – and gives a step-by-step example with screenshots, and is practically a love-letter to Lulu! I will now have to redraft that entire portion of the book, thanks to them!
In the past week or so I’ve been working on an editing project for Moon Books, and you can read more about that in the next section.
Editing
I completed editing an anthology for Moon Books in mid-August entitled “Moon Books Horror Anthology V”. This book contains 7 short stories filled with pure dread – and it was released on 20 August. It’s already available in eBook and paperback.
Currently I’m close to finishing the edit of a sci-fi tale for Moon Books. “Avenging Aranis” is by UK writer Steve McElhenny, and it’s the first part of a trilogy!
Marketing – The Dreaded “M” Word!
Portfolio 2020!
I thought it would be nice if I could produce a neat, organized catalog of all my books that interested parties could download and browse – a free, distributable and shareable catalog, and so I created “Portfolio 2020!” – a listing of all my currently available titles!
Portfolio is more than that though, because it also contains a biography as well as synopses for most of my titles – and I have a plan to update it regularly, perhaps on an annual basis! Portfolio 2020 is available as a free download from my website.
Videos
In August, Nigel Peever made this amazing audiobook trailer video for the newly released “Demonspawn” – have a look, isn’t it beautiful?
https://christinaengela.files.wordpress.com/2020/08/demonspawn-video-by-nigel-peever.mp4
Sales
Let’s start with the good news! Audiobook sales over July were truly amazing – with a massive (by my previous standards) 42 copies of “Blachart” sold from Audible during that month! This frenetic surge in sales didn’t last very long, just to the end of July, with just 3 sales of that book in August. I realize a slowdown is inevitable as a new title stops being new. In fact, August proved to be rather dull in comparison, with just 3 sales of “Blachart“, and 3 sales of a new audiobook title, “When Darkness Calls“. This of course led me to formulate a new personal theory regarding sales, popularity and choice of narrator when publishing an audiobook – one I will probably explore later in the second edition of “The Pitfalls of South African Self-publishing”, which I am working on as time allows.
But I digress! Ebooks sales on Ebooks2go have picked up a bit over August since I transferred my titles there at the start of the month, culminating in three whole sales (sarcasm definitely intended). To give you an idea how writers get ripped off by some distribution channels, just check out the screenshot below:
The three top-most entries show three eBook sales via Hoopla – and each of those titles sold for $2.99. What do I get out of it? 14 US cents out of $2.99 per sale! It’s positively downright bloody criminal! For comparison, the one beneath that – a sale via B&N at least gave me $1.64 out of $2.99 – but only one of those from July. No wonder so many writers give up!
Over-all though, I’ve got the idea that sales have been dwindling globally and not just for me, so I’m by no means feeling picked on. I realize that with economies teetering on the brink of disaster – and so many of my contacts on Facebook posting the sad news that they will be homeless and sleeping in their cars or on the streets within days – how very, very lucky I am. I may not be raking it in as an author – but at least I have a secure job, for which I’m very thankful indeed!
Publishing
These are the books I’ve released so far this year!
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Between January and September 2020 I released eight new titles! Of these, two – “Duck Blind” and “The Next Room” have been replaced by one combined title, “Mirror, Mirror” which includes both of them. Of course, this reduces my count back to 30 again – but when you already have 30 or so books to your name, what’s one here or there?
New Releases:
“Lifetime”
On August 07 Moon Books Publishing released a novella of mine called “Lifetime“, bringing my title-count up to 30! Here’s a look at the back cover blurb for the book:
“An entrepreneurial couple, happily married, run their deep-space prospecting company together. They are unexpectedly separated when the ship one of them is aboard is lost during a prospecting voyage. The other spares no effort in an attempt to find her, and immediately sets out on another ship to find her. Meanwhile on a remote planet, surrounded by wreckage and the bodies of her crewmates, she has survived and treated her injuries, and fights to stay alive while she awaits rescue…”
Buy now: eBook Paperback Audiobook (coming soon)
“Lifetime” is available in ebook and paperback and will be coming out in audiobook format soon, narrated by Miciah Dodge.
“Mirror, Mirror”
This was shortly thereafter followed by another new title “Mirror, Mirror”, on August 11, which repackages “Duck Blind” and “The Next Room” into one single novel-length book. “Duck Blind” and “The Next Room” are also now out of print – being henceforth exclusively available in “Mirror, Mirror”.
Buy now: eBook Paperback Audiobook (coming soon)
Here’s a look at the description:
“Things aren’t always as they seem. Neither was Charlie Branson – or Andy Niksn.
Outwardly, Charlie appeared to be the successful, respected, somewhat over-paid Captain of a commercial space liner.
In truth, it was 2025 – space liners did not yet exist, and the space liner Freedom was really just a very expensive set – a fancy simulator for wealthy clients the company took on simulated cruises into deep space to forget the real world for a while, to get away from it all – and they loved them for it!
In an atmosphere where people were locked away from reality for weeks at a time, and cos-playing and roleplaying redefined ‘normal’, telling fact and fantasy apart became more complicated than expected. For those who preferred the pleasant escape from the harsh realities of life outside, like Charlie, wishing it could all just be real became something almost like a prayer.
Andy Niksn, by contrast, was the very successful respected and somewhat over-paid Captain of an actual commercial space liner in the year 2773. Trouble was, Andy felt trapped! He was in a relationship – a dead-end partnership that had no future and promised both even less happiness. On top of that, his friend Jim had died recently, leaving Andy in the darkest place he’d ever been – and he didn’t mean space!
Andy wished he could just wake up to a different reality where everything could make sense again! For Andy, this too became something almost like a prayer!
As it turned out, someone heard them.
The answer wasn’t quite what they expected.”
Audiobooks
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“All That Remains” JEA (2019)
“See Them Aliens” MBP (2019)
“Blachart” MBP (2020)
“When Darkness Calls” (2020)
“Demonspawn” MBP (2020)
On August 7th I received the completed audiobook of book 2 in the Galaxii series, “Demonspawn“, narrated (and dramatized) by Nigel Peever! The audiobook was finally released on August 31, and it was worth every minute I waited for it!
Nigel has also committed to narrating book 3 in Galaxii, after the five or so other books he has waiting in the queue, so he should only get round to that one somewhere around January ’21. In the meantime, that gives me time to work on Galaxii book 4! 😉
On August 20, “When Darkness Calls“, narrated by Miciah Dodge, was released via Audible! You can read more about it here.
Coming Soon
In the meantime, here’s a look at the covers for hot new audiobooks currently in the pipeline:
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“Malice!” (2020) COMING SOON!
“Lifetime” (2020) COMING SOON!
Stay tuned for updates!
Reviews
You can see all my previous reviews here.
Currently Available Titles
I now have 30 unique titles available in 4 series (not including books I’ve been the editor for, and my 16 free promotional items)! My books are available in three different formats: EBooks, Paperbacks and Audiobooks. Click the links or images below to view titles available in these formats.
Communication
Below are links to a few of my most recent posts and articles since my last newsletter:
New Release: Demonspawn Audiobook
New Release: When Darkness Calls Audiobook
New Release: Horror Anthology V
Sinotec SJ86C LED Projector Review
New Release: Lifetime by Christina Engela
New Release: Mirror, Mirror by Christina Engela
“Demonspawn” Audiobook Now In For Review!
New Release: Lifetime by Christina Engela
Some Great Resources For Writers
Another Round At The Crow Bar #44 August 2020
If you want to see more articles, just click on the category links below:
Elements of Horror
FAQ Answered
Fun Facts
LGBT Heroes
The Tech Side
Secret Weapons of the Resistance
Writing Advice
Guest Writers
Newsletters
Interactions
Fan Mail, Reader Reviews & Honorable Mentions
I found the following awesome items to show you this month!
Great Book July 20, 2020 review on Audible for “Blachart” (audiobook):
Excellent story! “This is a very well written Sci-Fi tale that is told by an awesome narrator. I can’t wait to hear book 2!” – D. Sturgeon, Aug 13, 2020 on Audible for “Blachart” (audiobook).
Epic!!! “Another great tale told by narrator Nigel Peever. I look forward to the continuing Adventures of Blachart and Michael.” – Justin Bradley, Aug 16, 2020 on Audible for “Blachart” (audiobook).
Great Narrator “The story is pretty creepy, it takes place in South Africa. I’ve never heard haunting stories from this area. It’s a fun little story if you’re doing a drive on a dark night. The narration sounded excellent, and the protagonist in the story wasn’t taking no crap from the evil dead!” – Jeff Spencer, Aug 21, 2020 on Audible for “When Darkness Calls” (audiobook).
I display my Fan Mail, Reviews & Compliments with pride, gratitude and humility. You’re always welcome to have a look.
Hate Mail & Horrible Mentions
I’m rather proud of my hate mail, and you can review my collection here – but be forewarned, don’t do it while eating or drinking, or you might choke while laughing!
Interviews
All my interviews are linked to from this page. If you would like to do an interview with me about my work, please do get in touch!
In Closing
Well, that’s all for this time, folks! 🙂
Thanks again for all your support, friendship and interaction!
Feel free to email or message me via Facebook, Twitter or LinkedIn if you have any comments or questions!
Until next time, keep reading!
Cheers! 🙂
Catch me on social media!
Facebook | Twitter | LinkedIn | Academia | Minds | Instagram | GoodReads | Author’s Database | Library Thing | YouTube | Pintrest | Stage32 | The Book Marketing Network
If you would like to know more about Christina Engela and her writing, please feel free to browse her website.
If you’d like to send Christina Engela a question about her life as a writer or transactivist, please send an email to [email protected] or use the Contact form.
Show your appreciation for Christina’s work!
All material copyright © Christina Engela, 2020.
Another Round At The Crow Bar #45 September 2020 Hello friends and fans! Welcome to my 45th newsletter - September 2020!
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