#i actually don't know if this will go anywhere but i had to get the dialogue out of my head so here we are

[wuntrum]

can you speak on your severance s2 opinions? i promise this isnt in bad faith or anything, im just anon bc im shy lol, im genuinely curious

i'm gonna put this under a read more because it's gonna be long but...yeah [scratches head] if YOU the person reading this looooved this season and see nothing you didn't like about it, thats awesome and i'm happy for you. i also liked things in this season, and also its normal to be able to critique things you like, love and light <3 its literally just television

generally, yeah, i found myself disappointed with it. i think the writing this season, both the dialogue and then the actual character/world writing, fell flat and/or seemed like it was completely incongruous with the characters and world that we had seen in season 1. i think something i really appreciated about season 1 is that yes, mark was our main character and the lens we got introduced to both the inside and outside world, but both felt so much BIGGER than just him.

season 2, the entire plot and world and characters bend and contort to make mark like, the center of the universe lol. it's kind of ridiculous, the extent to which the world revolves around him now. it makes the world feel SOOO small. parts of my favorite worldbuilding aspects are seeing how the outside world feels about severance--i think the part where we see how working as a severed employee makes it almost impossible to work anywhere else is great! and in concept i like seeing other towns that have been devastated by lumon's industrialization, though i don't love the execution that we got. so like...everything lumon does is about mark? ALL of it? i know we don't know exactly how long lumon has been operating but like...they've been working on this stuff for longer than two years, lol. like, how many files have dylan completed? irving? petey? that girlie who wrote the lexington letter? is all of their work literally meaningless? like i get that there were people before gemma who failed the tests and they died, sure, but what about when mark started working there? what about the files that irving started and didn't finish, why don't they care about those? ohhhh right, because that's not the one that mark's working on. i get that it'd be a big deal if they got it to work fully once, but surely they'd want to make it work AGAIN, right??? like a science experiment?? i just wish we got like, A nod to other people on the testing floor, because i think the implication is that all of them are working on files connected to…different people, but maybe they're all just different versions of gemma?

honestly all of the innie stuff this season just felt so…idk, aimless? it feels like parts of the building only exist when the writers want them to, and just generally are not interested in exploring anything outside of the romantic aspects for all of these characters. like sure, after the season 1 finale, their asses are not gonna wanna work (EXCEPT FOR WHEN THEY DO? TO MOVE THE PLOT ALONG?), but where's the camaraderie? what about all those other people in O&D, they literally export things to the testing floor, maybe they know about gemma? fundamentally i think the thing that's the most frustrating about innie mark is that they keep telling us that he doesn't care about gemma. which, sure, outie gemma, he doesn't have that same connection with as helly, whatever. but also, he DOES care about her, he literally knows that that's ms casey and that lumon was just going to do what they always do when they fire people????? like s1 mark cared soooo much about his coworkers, ALL OF THEM, even the ones that weren't there anymore—seeing petey and then ms casey get removed was like, a HUGE deal and vital to his growth as a character!!!! and the way that they constructed this whole season basically to remove everyone that isn't mark and helly by the end. lol. i'm honestly shocked that they didn't make a new version of the desk that was just two chairs, like dylan was just excluded from the finale except for when they needed him to come in and hold the door against mr. milchick. again. lol

i don't inherently have a problem with exploring the romantic stuff, i think that could have been done well, but i just don't think it was. and that's primarily because, i think the writing this season for helly was ass! they took away her agency and subjugated her to be just the love interest for mark! especially with the finale, i just feel like the helly i know would've been like mark, what are you doing??? go?!? like she wants to take down lumon, THAT's what will take down lumon! like whatever, mark made the choice that he did, but helly playing along with it makes no fucking senseee. like they want us to think that it's the same ol helly we know and love, they give us crumbs of her anger, like when she's rallying the marching band people or whatever, but again, only when it's plot convenient. WHY WOULD SHE NOT ATTACK JAME? he's like 90???? and helly doesn't like this man???? she has nothing to lose???? fucking THROW something at him helly!!!! the helly that tried to chop her fingers off and hang herself and gave that speech in the s1 finale is not in the room with us. and i don't mean this in a way where i think it's helena again, it's not. they've just completely fumbled her character because they want mark and helly to be together at all costs. and honestly, i think it's so reductive to make this show just about ships, but textually it feels like that's what they want us to do, and i think that's sad. again, it makes the show feel so SMALL, when the world within it used to feel so BIG and like we would want to learn more about it. i care about mark and helly--before they kissed!! i think it was rewarding to see the ways they challenged each other and grew as people!! them as a romantic thing could work but they haven't put in the work to MAKE it work. and, it feels like of redundant even to say, but i do think it's fucking ridiculous to write a story where we get kissing and fucking for allllll the straight characters and then the one gay couple doesn't even get a kiss before separating them completely and writing irving out of the show, basically. like what are we in, hayes code era television?

but yeah, the information they chose to reveal vs what they didn't was also frustrating. i honestly wish they revealed less! there's so much TELLING this season. it feels like they think we're stupid (which, i can't speak for the entire population watching the show, maybe some people literally do need mark to look at the camera and explain everything, idk). like there's sooo much clever storytelling in the first season that just, completely gets snuffed out from overexplaining. i understand in the finale that oMark needs to tell iMark about why he did all of this but like, WE as the audience already know??? we don't need to see this?? and cobel confirming stuff i feel like we already knew about how the numbers work and like, i just don't knowwww. like you can just show me it, i was picking up on it. like we know about the four tempers, you show it to us all the time, cobel having to look dead in the camera and explain it just made me feel like there was a better way we could've done this. i do think some stuff benefits from a "hard" confirmation. like i'm glad they confirmed the helena thing, BECAUSE it backs up and supports all of the lovely and subtle things they had already shown to prove that it WAS helena! like i've known since the first episode LOL, so they do KNOW how to do subtle storytelling. and i think the gemma episode was great, i loved seeing her as a character and thought it gave her so much depth. but again, i think allll of the explaining they do this season not only snuffs out the fun of speculating on the viewing end, but from a writing perspective it just kind of writes them into a corner. i think they're focused too much on making these elaborate set pieces and events take place without thinking of how they fit together, not only on like a writing/episodic level but just the world of lumon at large.

i think a great way they showed story in the first season is through the paintings, and through irving and burt bonding over the paintings! like it not only establishes the lore of kier and then we get to learn more about them as characters through their reactions to the paintings. the paintings this season, honestly, were weak, they were so heavy handed. love and light to whoever painted them, but they were nottt doing the job for me.

(this is a small thing, but like…the intake questionnaire asks them to "name a US state or territory," so they KNOW that delaware is a state. so why would they think the equator is a building? again its just like. a cutesy moment for mark and helly to banter but they could've done it in a way that isn't contradictory to like, our understanding of what information crosses over the sever and what does not).

i keep thinking about the ORTBO, and it just seems fucking CRAZY to me that they aren't freaking out about SEEING THE SKY? BREATHING FRESH AIR? FEELING FIRE? SLEEPING?? WASN'T THE WHOLE THING THAT THEY COULDN'T FALL ASLEEP???? i guess my impression of how the chip works is that the technology doesn't know how to handle when they enter a subconscious/asleeep state, so the innie and outie memories begin to bleed together, hence why dozing would be a bad thing on the job. but again, they clearly had this idea of how they wanted irving to reveal that it's helena in the waterfall, and yes, i did enjoy the spectacle of the episode, but its another example of how they'll build these moments and only focus on what they want to see. like there's so much interesting stuff that they could explore and just choose not to, because (usually) it doesn't involve mark, or mark and helly.

also, i'm just gonna say it, i feel like the writing for the women this season all was kinda bad! it's, again, a byproduct of the world revolving around mark now. reghabi is brought into the story when mark needs her, and cast aside when he doesn't want her anymore. devon has been completely reduced to mark's lackey, like i guess ricken and the baby are fucking fine or whatever??? because she only exists when mark is around, and her only job is caring about mark (which obviously yes, they're siblings, of course they care—but s1 devon had a life outside of mark as well). cobel is only brought back into the story to explain to mark how cold harbor works. i said this before but honestly i like the concept of her little solo episode, though the execution wasn't great, because at least she was doing something on her own (except for when she needs that guy to help her. heaven forbid a woman does something of her own accord without a man to help). and again, helly is completely flanderized to be mark's love interest. i think there's a way to have mark and helly be together and them be their own people, but for the length of the season they did not have the proper time to unpack all the shit from the ORTBO episode so everyone just…conveniently gets over it very quickly, like in the span of a day. like i do think it's a jump to go from "i don't trust you, are you even you?" to missionary under plastic tarps that quickly, i'm sorry. and i think even gemma suffers from this fate as well. i think with hers it makes more sense, like she fucking loves her husband, but i wish she was given opportunities to like…want things for herself, too. like she hasn't been outside in two years! i bet she misses her job, her students, her family, devon, ricken, like anyone outside of mark? but she has to be the tragic love interest that can't be with mark but can't run away from mark, either. she's reduced to set dressing for mark and helly by the end.

they constructed this season i think, with the hopes and knowledge that they'll likely get a season 3. which yes, we know now that it's been confirmed and approved or whatever, but they didn't know that when making season 2, and it feels like no one got a full character arc. it's all start and no follow through. we've had the same "mr. milchick experiences racism in the workplace" moment like what, five, six times, and yet we haven't even started to see him DO something about it yet? like sure he told mr. drummond to eat shit, but then to play along with the minstrel show cold harbor shit, they just didn't care about giving that plot line any action so it'll just get brushed along to season 3. (and while there's intentional commentary about race in the show, it also feels like there's unintentional consequences to their writing choices that upholds the whiteness. like, natalie is just forgotten about, reghabi is dropped as soon as mark doesn't want to play with her anymore, ms. huang barely gets to do anything before being written off and sent away, and yes, i do think having gemma suffer as mark and helly skip away is part of it. it leaves a bad taste in my mouth, sorry!). i think dylan is maybe the closest we get to an interesting arc, and i enjoy the inclusion of his wife, but even he's reduced to JUST this story, only getting to talk to mark or helly when the writers need him to, i guess. and the stuff with burt and fields is so nothing, like it feels like it should be going somewhere but they're just leaving it open for season 3 (i guess??? even though it seems like irving isn't going to be in it at all, so why would we be following burt and fields??? and also don't even get me started on how the outie irving stuff is just NOT EXPLORED AT ALL. like whatever sure who the hell cares, sorry for wanting to see that go somewhere or whatever).

it's too early for full reintegration to happen so, we'll just finish that in season 3. (then why introduce it so early in season 2? ohhh right, we need cliffhangers to end every episode on). it almost feels like they don't have faith that people will keep watching without introducing these dramatic moments, but it's all just gasps of breath, there's no actual momentum. like, i've already watched the first season, you don't need to bait me with the prospect of seeing meaningful progression and then take it away from me when the next episode starts. the structure of how episodes speak to each other is that they…don't? like obviously i don't need every episode to pick up on the exact moment the last left off, but the timeline of this season is just soooo strange. the first two episodes are in the same span of time, and then there's gemma and cobel's episodes back to back…it genuinely just feels like they didn't consider the season as a whole which, considering how much money and time it took to make it happen, makes no sense.

and to continue on the timeline aspect, it feels so confusing as to how much time has really passed. it feels like the wanted the structure of the first season, but the pacing mechanic of the first season (working up to the end of the quarter to get to the waffle party) makes the pacing of the second feel even worse. like a.) mark's completed like 3 files a quarter (if we assume he's worked there for 8 quarters, i.e. two years), so making THIS file the super special final one truncates the possible time by at least a third.but then also, b.) he's been at like 95% complete since like, episode 5..? again, i just think it should've been considered more during the planning stages. and it kind of boggles my mind that the creative team views the marching band in this finale to be analogous to the waffle party in s1 when, it's way closer to the music dance experience? (they said this in the like behind the scenes for the finale ep). and in that regard, it really does kind of feel like a retread that doesn't work as well because, again, it's all about mark! especially after the shit with the kier statue, why would mr. milchick play along with the song and dance, like it just feels like they wanted to use tramell tillman's dance experience again, and they wanted to use the colored lights again. he could've just stood by the door to make sure mark and helly stayed there, which was obviously the goal of having all those people there. and yeah, i get the work is mysterious and important or whatever, but the implication that they have ALL OF THESE PEOPLE whos sole job is to be a marching band makes no fucking sense, i'm sorry. i find it hard to play along with the worldbuilding, again it makes lumon seem like its run by like dr. doofenshmirtz or something, it's so cartoony. like are they a global and successful company, or are they incompetent and leave gaping holes for their employees to undo everything? this is THE MOST IMPORTANT DAY IN LUMON HISTORY and they couldn't…shut the door to MDR like they had before? the goat sacrifice room is directly outside the exports hall door? the music dance experience works so well as a catharsis moment because everyone has their own shit going on, and we get to see the guy who hasn't really disobeyed yet (dylan) finally snap, and we see the others come and support him as a TEAM. it's just spectacle for us, the viewer. and especially the thing where they make the panels with mark's face on it—HE CAN'T SEE IT???? i don't need fan service winking moments like that, i dunno, that just annoyed me lol.

anyway, i feel like i have more to say probably but i gotta go do things so, i'm gonna leave it here. in conclusion, i'm missing my friends from s1 MDR sooo so bad, i feel like i haven't seen them this season at all. i did like parts of this season, but overall it was not what i was hoping it would be. (i don't even really KNOW what i wanted it to be, and of course it doesn't matter what i "want," but i feel like what i "want" lined up with what they wanted to do explore with season 1 so…maybe that's where the dissonance is coming from). and whereas at the end of s1, where i left it being like "where are they going to go from here?? (as in, theres so many possibilities", this season finale has left me asking "…where are we gonna go from here?" because i'm left like, inherently incurious about the people we have left and the choices they've made. and, i feel like THEY (as in the executive team making it) must feel this way too, because apparently they've completely scrapped the writers room from this season and added on two new showrunners. good luck to whoever that executive story editor is LOL

[gibor-zolel]

Avery; the not so chill plant enthusiast

Well I am late as per usual but here it is;

This post will mainly be analyzing Avery's character but I will also be going over who I think Avery is the comparison and contrast to (it's "Wayne")

This is over 2,000 words with screenshots so I'm putting it under a read more. Enjoy :)

When we first see Avery they are portrayed as more of a minor character or someone that can easily be overlooked despite being one of the main love interests. Now part of this is because supposedly there's going to be 7 episodes and we're only on 4 but I believe the devs intentionally made the majority of Avery interactions up to the player's decision to include them and speak to them.

Depending on how you play the game; you may only see Avery as a passerby when you visit the diner or the general store. You don't actually have to invite them anywhere; it's up to us to make Avery feel included and wanted in the story unfolding.

The first thing we learn about Avery is that they're working for their aunt because they had "issues" with their family about their education. I don't believe it's ever expanded upon but I'm eager to learn more hopefully in episode 5.

Avery the supportive but left out "friend"

Avery also does their best to hype up and encourage the people around them. Such as in episode 1 when you go to the diner with Stella and Avery tells Stella not to downplay her success. On the wiki it states that Avery dislikes it when friends devalue themselves. The problem is that this type of friendship seems to be a one way street at times. We never see Stella or Kaneeka or Oscar or whoever invite Avery to places or put in the same level of effort of trying to connect that Avery does. Avery is extremely observant to people they see as their friends; such as when Avery not only notices that Gretchen is gone but also that Stella isn't her usual self.

Avery is nonjudgmental and tries their best to be empathic and sort of a mediator for the group such as pointing out to Kaneeka that the mines are obviously failing and Tabby clearly isn't some coal baron or when Avery directly calls the animal in the video a mountain lion despite knowing how Stella's refuses to accept any evidence contrary to her worldview.

When you go to the diner in episode 2 and question if Avery will even believe such a wild story, they say this;

I do think Avery can be a bit nosy at times but this isn't a malicious urge to get dirt on other people but rather a desire to be a part of someone's life and fill the loneliness in their heart.

Avery feels like a new character on a show that's already been running for 5 seasons. People are nice but you're not part of the OG cast ya know?

If you have Keen Eye you can say that Stella has talked up Avery's party and you don't think she would have done that if she didn't feel that Avery is a part of the town. So some of this isolation may be in their head.

Now personally, I do think Stella and Kaneeka often leave Avery out of things but I think this isn't because they don't like Avery but rather they're too caught up in their own business and inner worlds to take a step back and notice how Avery feels. However; there is also truth in acknowledging that loneliness can sometimes just be you overthinking things or situations in your head and I think Avery tends to do this.

Avery's boredom clashing with their empathy

A particularly interesting clash of traits in Avery is that they're empathic but also crave excitement so much that it can be borderline insensitive at times. After telling your story of what happened last night; Avery expresses remorse about Gretchen or Duke but then follows it up quickly with "how exciting"

This follows into episode 3 when you visit Avery and say "I've enjoyed the challenge"

Avery is someone who appears cool and collected but craves excitement and chaos. They seem to enjoy playing Nancy Drew to an extant too as they're always willing to help fill you in on any information they hear and they comment on being in the loop due to working at the diner. They're like a reverse Shaggy from scooby doo!

But Avery does pull back when you comment on it being wrong for us to feel excited.

"I wouldn't hate it"

This makes me think that in an upcoming chapter, Avery is going to come face to face with a dangerous situation and is either going to regret it or fully embrace it and endanger themselves or possibly others. There are several times Avery can "joke" about being okay with a ditchling putting an egg in them. I'm praying this doesn't foreshadow Avery being eaten alive...

The lonely drifting musician with too many plants

We learn that Avery's obsession with plants started when they bought a pothos to make their apartment feel less lonely and empty. Then they got a bunch more until it turned in a jungle. They joined a plant community online, both as a way to become more knowledgeable about their plants but also a way to connect with others.

When you ask if they have a favorite; Avery tells you their favorite plant is the dragon scale alocasia, which was a plant that someone from the online community gave them. Life got busy so they don't talk anymore but Avery still sees the plant as a way to remember that someone thinks of them.

Plus the leaves look like big puffy cartoons.

We learn that Avery is also a musician that plays synths, but started with the bass because it "called to them". On the Scarlet Hollow wiki it states that "Avery's love language is sharing plant cuttings with others. However for something more serious, they write songs for them."

Which is super cute and while Avery obviously loves plants; I think their ultimate passion is music as they state that music is their joy and they'd rather juggle having a job and playing on sound cloud than music becoming their livelihood.

Avery uses music as a way to express their emotions, connect with others, and carry on folk traditions.

Despite this; they have plans to move on. They state they don't want to work at the diner forever but also aren't sure what else to do or where else to go. They like to be on the move and meet new people and exciting situations.

What's strange is that it appears Avery is unhappy yet when you ask if they're unhappy; they say that this is actually the happiest they've ever been. Which implies that pre Scarlet Hollow they were even more lonely and lost in life. I think Avery desires a friend that they can be more vulnerable and open around.

Once again Avery is very perceptive and points out that Stella has walls up and Kaneeka is too busy with the store and family drama. They're also the first person to point out that something is strange about Sybil and will later on just straight up ask her if she's a witch.

Avery's potentially dangerous friendship with Julius?

Avery ended up forming a bond with one of the Holler's more prickly residents; Julius Tremaine. Julius apparently overheard Avery mentioning to aunt Winnie that they needed a bench for the garden and lo and behold a bench appeared the next day. I think Avery really appreciated that someone went out of their way to do something for them.

Avery explains that they and Julius now talk a lot more and that Julius got them a new frame for one of the beds recently. I get the impression that out of all the residents of Scarlet Hollow, that Avery has a soft spot for Julius in particular.

When you point out that Julius hasn't been in the diner; they express concern and say that they'll start getting worried if he doesn't show up tomorrow and states that no one else checks up on him. I don't think people outside of Winnie and Julius check up on Avery either.

The reason this friendship concerns me is I believe the next "choice" will be on the Tremaine farm and it'll involve Avery getting hurt or killed by one of Julius's traps or perhaps even getting attacked by one of the ditchlings. Sybil says that ditchlings don't attack humans but it's important to remember she also says she's never heard of this many before. The ditchlings may start off killing the small, weaker creatures and then begin killing people once the animals are gone.

Again there are weirdly a lot of dialogue options for Avery talking about being incubated or possibly killed by some otherworldly being. I've heard theories that the giant pumpkin may even be alive or have some kind of creature living in it. Makes me wonder if there's going to be a little shop of horrors homage....

Avery and "Wayne"

It's explained later to us that the ghost haunting Oscar and Rosalina's house chooses it's victims based on how well they fit the characters in the "play". It's obvious these aren't perfect cast choices but it's making due with what it has. It chooses Stella for The Lover because she and Tabitha were in a situationship, it oddly chooses Rosalina to play the mother protecting her child, Kaneeka to play the Witch, Oscar to play the dad and......if you invite Avery, you'll get an exclusive scene where Avery is playing a character called "The Entity"

Now I'm not going to go full theory mode into why I think the spirit possessing Wayne is the Entity but there's several hints to this such as possessed Avery's eyes opening when speaking and then relaxing while silent. Similar to how Wayne's eyes glow when talking and then fade out when quiet. There's more hints but I don't want to derail this post.

Rather let's discuss why Charlie choose Avery.

Firstly it appears this "Entity" is listening in on other people's conversations and is quite observant. It even knows that Eddie is pregnant. Avery is observant by working at the diner and overhearing conversations while Wayne is.....well he's a stalker. Standing in the background and listening in on our conversations and has been implied to be with for all our lives.

So it has Avery's observant nature but what else? Well if you have Street Smarts and Powerful Build in episode 1 you can explore the estate. In it you find someone with glowing yellow eyes who slinks back into the darkness after you almost catch them playing the piano. Assuming this is "Wayne"; that would mean he also is found of music.

Both Avery and Wayne desire connection and are loyal to those they care about. Avery seems to desire a close knit group of people but is friendly to everyone in town and is eager to help others even if they don't know them; while Wayne is obsessively focused on one individual (us) and is honestly quite nasty to other people or completely ignores them.

Avery and Wayne are also more in the background at times. With Avery needing to be included or else they'll end up as a stranger that hangs around other people and Wayne literally hiding in the background.

Avery calls their relationship with Sybil more of a business relationship and we know that Wayne has been hanging around Sybil's tea room and that Sybil has been helping him with....something.

Both Avery and Wayne appear cool and collected at first glance but there are moments which show us their hidden emotions. With Avery this is their desire for danger and excitement brimming beneath the surface while for Wayne there seems to be an underlying anger and possibly even hatred he's hiding from us. Dustin mentions there's a "human" in the estate who's eyes are always watching and hateful. I'm 90% sure this is Wayne.

I think the "compare and contrast" between Avery and Wayne is that Avery is an example of a positive loving friend who wants to make connections but is often feeling left out and lonely so they try their best to make sure no one else feels that way.

Meanwhile Wayne is an example of a toxic obsessive person who crosses boundaries and is hostile to anyone he deems a threat to the person he "cares" about. I get the impression that Wayne is jealous of our connection with the other characters in the story too and wants to show us that we don't need anyone but him.

Also a quick tidbit but I think "Wayne" is nonbinary like Avery but we refer to him using masculine pronouns because the spirit is possessing a man's body.

But that's all I have for now! I'll be making my Kaneeka and Reese post next so stay tuned!

[pushing500]

The Jones boys aren't about to leave their little girl behind. They still have so much to teach her, and Ivy loves them too much to let them go anywhere without her.

Alright, that's three down (3 ½ if we include Henry the flesh whip), and two to go! For the second-to-last time, an introduction to our options:

Why should we bring Tokori?

- He has an expertise in first aid, which will likely be an essential skill in setting up a new colony

- If his medical skill doesn't work, he can also raise the dead (nine more times, at least. Then he's out of fingers to sacrifice.)

- He's got a detoxifier lung and a detoxifier kidney, which could both be useful for dealing with pollution in our new colony

- We only just met him, so it will be a good opportunity to get to know him more

- He's a delight to draw and still has both his natural eyes so I can have fun drawing them

Why should we leave Tokori behind?

- We only just met him, so we wouldn't miss him as much as some of the others

- Mechi is an accomplished doctor, even if it isn't his expertise

- He would be sad if we didn't get plumbing and a bathtub set up ASAP

- Addiction to coffee in more than one person may be difficult to keep in check while we set up a new colony

- Seeing the same face drawn over and over again will surely become tedious eventually, right?

Why should we bring Lansa?

- He's still getting used to being alive and needs someone responsible to keep an eye on him

- He's got untapped psycaster potential that we still need to explore

- He is the only Jones boy NOT addicted to coffee so we don't have to facilitate that in a new colony

- He's a delight to draw

Why should we leave Lansa behind?

- He's grumpy and rude and dislikes most of the other colonists already

- He hasn't been alive in this colony for very long so we won't miss him as much as some of the others

- His bionic eyes are less fun to draw than they could be

- Seeing the same face drawn over and over again will surely become tedious eventually, right?

Why should we bring Alistair?

- Just look at him

- Mechi made Alistair with his own two hands, meaning Alistair is probably the closest to a biological son he’ll ever have

- We haven’t seen Alistair wake up yet, there’s still so much to experience

- LOOK AT HIM

- He’s very good at making bionics and enabling Mechi’s transhumanist lifestyle

- He’s a delight to draw

Why should we leave Alistair behind?

- He hasn’t awakened yet so there’s not actually any personality to be attached to

- He hasn’t awakened yet so he has no ability to learn new skills that might be required in a new colony

- Mute, so not too much potential for funny conversations to draw

Why should we bring Melissa?

- Having a colonist with unnatural healing abilities akin to reusable healer mech serums is op as hell and also very cool

- Even if she didn’t have creepjoiner healing powers, she has fun cancer powers

- Every new colony benefits from a creepy blind grandma

- Mechi owes her for saving him from duplication sickness

- She’s a delight to draw

Why should we leave Melissa behind?

- Mechi hates her more than usual because she’s super ugly

- She’s blind

- Apparently the creepjoiner unnatural healing has the potential for nasty side effects

- We haven’t had any creepjoiner negative side effects from her yet, but she’s been at an outpost which might have paused the countdown for it to show up

- She’s polyamorous, which means she’ll constantly be sad that she’s not in a relationship

Why should we bring XiaoLiang?

- He’s always been there for Mechi and co., it seems appropriate for him to follow them and continue to help out

- He’s very cool

- He’s got an expertise in sharpshooting which is bound to be useful

- We might run into his grandpa Paul again and it’d be nice if they met

- He's 100% got a crush on the Jones boys and that'd be funny to watch

- He’s a delight to draw

Why should we leave XiaoLiang behind?

- Perhaps it’s time for XiaoLiang to go back to being a wandering Man in Black

- He’s an undergrounder, which means he’ll get upset if we make him go out to hunt or otherwise put his shooting expertise to good use

- He’s polyamorous, which means he’ll constantly be sad that he’s not in a relationship

- He's 100% got a crush on the Jones boys and they would be extremely annoyed having to deal with it

- His grandpa Paul might show up to Sparks again, and it’d be nice if they met

Why should we bring Flapjack?

- He’s a little bit good at every skill which is very useful for starting a new colony

- He is kind, which means he’ll get along with everyone no matter how disfigured they are by flesh whips or cut-out eyes

- My brother says he has a "cool beard" and you "can't beat that"

- Looks a bit like Jesus

- He’s a delight to draw

Why should we leave Flapjack behind?

- Not a particularly interesting colonist so far

- He’s just sort of got NPC energy

- Looks a bit like Jesus

- Good at lots of skills but not great at any

Why should we bring Jut?

- He’s a good boy and I love him

- Incredible melee ability which is useful for defending a new colony

- Can explode people with his mind

- We already know his creepjoiner downside (it's the "disturbing" trait) so we don't need to worry about anything more serious popping up in the future

- Sanguophage powers might be useful

- Speaks French

- He’s a delight to draw

Why should we leave Jut behind?

- He’d need to steal Mechi (or someone else’s) hemogen from time to time

- He’s "disturbing" and makes the others uncomfortable sometimes

- He’s blind

- He’s French

And so, without further ado...

First | Next | Previous

[crazycat010]

Jealousy Jealousy

Levi Ackerman x Reader

Based on the song "Jealousy Jealousy" by Olivia Rodrigo.

Warnings: insecurities, angst, sad, small fluff, reader loses her friend because of a new girl named Natasha (sorry if that's your name), unrequited love, mention of death and sacrificing yourself for Humanity's sake. Sad angsty ending but I'll do a part 2 if you want.

Reader insert, no reference to reader's body so it can be seen as female, gender neutral and male reader

"All your friends are so cool, you go out every night In your daddy's nice car, yeah, you're living the life Got a pretty face, a pretty boyfriend too I wanna be you so bad, and I don't even know you"

“Y/n?”

“Earth to Y/n?”

“Y/NNNN!” Hange yelled, pulling you out of your daydream.

“Sh!t sorry. I zoned out, again.” You explained yourself, trying to look anywhere but in your friend’s eyes.

“It’s what you’ve been doing this whole week. Just ask him out already!” She whisper-yelled.

“I don’t know who you’re talking about.” You replied stubbornly.

“C’mon Y/n, you’ve liked him since you first met him! If you don’t tell him how you feel now, you may never get the chance to!” Petra added.

“Thanks a lot you guys…” You said, slumping back in your seat lazily. How were you supposed to tell him, your Captain, Humanity’s Strongest Soldier, The Levi Ackerman, you were in love with him and had been for years now. You’d probably just make it weird and ruin your friendship with him, because no way in hell did he reciprocate your feelings.

“You know what? If you’re not going to tell him, I will!” Hange said resolute and determined to end your suffering. She had been your best friend since you’d graduated from being simple Cadets and knew better than anyone how much you were actually worth though also how much you thought lowly of yourself because of your insecurities and negative thoughts.

“WHAT?! NO!” You didn’t notice you’d raised your voice until you realized everyone was staring at you.

Your face became beet red as you waved it off with a small ��Don’t worry, everything’s fine. We’re all fine.” Successfully getting everyone to go back to what they were previously doing.

“I wasn’t lying before, I’ll tell him if you don’t.” She went back to whispering, drawing your attention back to the stressful topic.

“Okay, okay fine. I’ll tell him! I just, need to get us a moment together, the perfect moment. I’ll think about it tomorrow, when I go to my parents’ house.”

Your friends, including Mike, Oluo, Eld and Gunther, high-fived each other victoriously, but were quick to act nonchalant as soon as they saw their Captain approaching you.

“What’s happening? I heard some commotion coming from here just minutes ago.” He asked, eyeing you all with his usual scowl.

Suddenly, your shoes became a very interesting view as Hange quickly answered: “Don’t worry Captain. Nothing happened! Y/n here was just…telling us about a few hand-to-hand combat techniques and discussing them with the team.”

He glanced at your petrified form questioningly, but swiftly came to the decision it was not an important matter.

“Anyways, I wanted to tell you, tomorrow a new member will be joining the Levi Squad, I want you all to welcome her but most importantly make sure to get along with her.” He continued.

You and the rest of the team stared at each other with a shocked expression on your face, though Petra was the first to speak up: “You referred to the new member with a her, so I suppose she’s a girl. Who is she?”

“Yeah, and when will we meet her?” Eld chimed in.

“Her name is Natasha and you’ll all meet her tomorrow morning at training, the rest, you can ask her for yourself.” He answered before retreating back to his office to finish writing the last papers before going to bed.

“Well, that’s new…” Eld said.

“Who even is she? I mean, she must be great with her skills and everything if Levi accepted her in our team.” Oluo said.

“I guess we’ll find out tomorrow. You don’t know anything about this, do you Hange?” Gunther sighed, running a hand through his neatly combed hair.

“I’m just as surprised as you are. How about you Mike?” The scientist returned the question to the silent blonde.

“Don’t look at me! I know about this just as much as you do.” He raised his hands in the air defensively.

“So she’s suddenly joining the team, nobody knows about her and Levi promptly refuses to tell us anything. She sure was able to become the center of attention before even coming.” Erd said.

“Hey Y/n, you okay?” Hange questioned you.

You had zoned out again…This Natasha girl sounded quite mysterious, but most of all, you weren’t accustomed to Levi’s eyes subtly lighting up when he talked about someone.

“Yeah, yeah don’t worry. I’m just tired, that’s all. In fact, I think I’mma head to bed, anybody coming with?” You got up from your seat lazily.

“Nah. I still have a few hours left to enjoy in me. See you in two days, right?” Gunther replied for everyone.

“Yeah.” You walked alone to your bedroom as unanswered questions swirled through your mind, mostly regarding Natasha and Levi. You pushed them down though, because they surely weren’t gonna ruin your free day with your parents.

The next day you woke up early and headed to town, where your parents owned a bakery. Your family’s apartment was right over it and you could still recall how much you used to help your parents when they were at work, sometimes getting scolded for not wanting to go to bed. You didn’t spend as much time there now, but Levi usually left you a few free days per month to visit your parents, and you sometimes also brought the rest of your team with you to have a hearty meal by the fireplace. 

As always, your parents were marveled to see you and the day flew by too quickly. In the blink o an eye, you were back at the Scout’s, going to bed earlier than usual because of the tiredness caused by all the riding.

The next day, you were woken up by a ray of sunshine seeping through your window and illuminating the room.

You saw your companion Petra soundly sleeping on the bed on the other side of the room, so you dressed yourself without making any noise and walked your way to the stables.

“Hello Grass Goblin!” You saluted your hooved friend smirking happily. Her real name was Lily, in honor of the beautiful flowers you put in her hair when you braided it, but you’d had her for so much time you had become besties to the point the nickname rolled off your tongue more naturally than her real name.

You brought your horse out for a ride, fed her and combed her hair into a beautiful braid with a few flowers tucked in between.

Before you’d realized, it wast time for you to go to training, which meant you’d finally get to meet this mysterious Natasha.

You were sure you had arrived on time, nonetheless, the moment you stepped into the training area you found your team, Levi and an unfamiliar blondie chatting loudly and carelessly, as if they had been friends since forever.

To say this whole situation weirded you out was an understatement: your teammates had taken days or even months to warm up to you, and if Levi talked to you now it was only thanks to the years of hard work and missions done for and with him. Nonetheless, they had become best friends with this new chick in what, a day and a half? From where you stood, you could also see Levi smiling. Okay, what? Like, you didn’t even think the word “smile” existed in his vocabulary and suddenly he was there, grinning ear to ear in the face of this new kid?!

You approached the laughing group in a matter of minutes with a weird: “Hey guys!”

The moment they saw you, they all shut up and stopped laughing, turning to look at their shoes or share strange looks with each other.

You shrugged it off: focusing on this situation wouldn’t bring you any good and you still had to figure out a way to talk to Levi about your feelings.

Levi spoke up: “So, for today’s training we’ll divide the team into pairs and do some exercises in the woods. Form the pairs and go grab your horses, we’ll meet there in 10. Oh, and Gunther, you’re coming with me.”

Gunther visibly slumped, shoulders dropping as he prepared himself mentally for hours of scoldings and glares from his Captain.

As soon as Levi was out of range, you hit Gunther lightly in the shoulder, telling him ironically: “C’mon man, wasn’t it your dream to work with the Levi Ackerman?”

“Yeah, until I actually started working with him! He scolds me so much I wouldn’t be surprised if he got angry with me because of my favorite color.”

“What’s your favorite color?” You asked him, heading to the stables once again.

“Blue, yours?”

“Don’t really have one. I like all bright colors equally, though it depends on the day.”

“You know what? I ain’t even gonna ask you questions. Learned my lesson over the years.” He laughed, departing to go get his horse.

Oluo and Erd had formed a pair, and you saw Petra chatting with Anastasia on the other side of the stables, so you went to ask her: “Hi Anastasia! Hi Petra! Would you like to be in pair with me for the exercises?”

“Sorry Y/n, I’m already with Anastasia and we can’t be in three…” She tried to explain herself.

“Because…?” What was up with her? Levi always let you form groups of three with another teammate whenever someone was missing.

“Because we can’t, okay? Stop asking dumb questions!” She basically hissed at you, annoyed.

Okay, what was happening? You’re away for what, a night and a couple of hours and they all hate you out of the blue? You watched as the two girls got on their horses, giggling like two teenage girls and rode off, not even bothering to wait for you.

A wave of sadness washed over you, and you could feel tears welling up in your eyes, yet you took all your strong will and pushed them back, not wanting to show the vulnerable side of you for idiotic situations like this. You had always been very emotional, and nobody before your team and Hange had ever gone out of their way to help you or talk to you. When you’d joined the Cadets you were pretty much of a loner, but Hange had managed to get you out of your shell and you’d learned how to make friends, eventually leading to you befriending the infamous ‘Levi Squad’.

However, you were probably overthinking it all, as usual. Your friends wouldn’t possibly leave you just like this, with no warning or reason whatsoever, right?

You headed to the woods’ entrance, were the rest of your team was awaiting you.

“So, are all the pairs formed?” Levi asked.

“Yeah” Everybody answered, except for you, though he didn’t notice it and went off to explain the exercises to everyone.

The training had been agonizingly long and painful and, as soon as sundown approached, you were all eager to get off your horses, eat something and skedaddle to bed as quickly as possible.

“Hey guys, how about we all have dinner together?” You suggested.

“Sorry Y/n, but me and Natasha wanted to eat together and then chat for a bit.” Petra apologized.

“No can do, me and the boys are going in town. Sorry.” Erd answered.

“Oh…Okay. That’s fine, it’s absolutely fine. I-I mean, it’s not like we don’t already see each other every day right?” You said awkwardly.

Petra offered you an apologetic smile and then went off with her new friend, the boys getting their horses to the stables.

You didn’t exactly know what you would do that night, but perhaps you could wait for Hange to finish her shift at the Lab and have dinner with her.

After hours spent wandering around the huge building, it was finally the time of the end of her shift, so you ran to her study eager to tell her about your day and hear about hers, as you did almost every night.

“Hangeeeee!!!” You exclaimed, barging into her room with a big smile plastered on your face, excitement etched all over your features.

“Hey Y/n!” She responded. There was something off about the way she was acting, and you’d noticed how she was way less happy to see you than usual, so you decided to investigate: “What’s up with you today?”

“Listen Y/n, I’m truly sorry. I know you’ve been waiting for me to finish this job for hours so we could eat together, but I already had something planned tonight and I really don’t want to miss it. You wouldn’t mind if we skipped today’s daily catch up, right?” She pleaded.

You were taken aback, what has happening? You’re absent for a day and suddenly nobody can eat or spend time with you?

“So…?” She asked again, seeing as you’d zoned out.

“Y-yeah yeah, ’s fine don’t worry.” You gave her a tight lipped smile, shutting the door behind you and going outside on a walk to clear your mind.

The next few days were spent like this, everyone seemingly avoiding your presence. Hange had started having more and more plans at dinner so you never actually got to talk, and the rest of your team were just ignoring you, making up fake excuses in order to not spend time with you. However, you’d noticed how they always regrouped with Natasha. One day, you decided you wanted to get to know this new girl, and with only good intentions in your heart, you approached her while she chatted with Petra and Hange. What you didn’t expect, however, was the side eye she gave you, chuckling under her breath and asking: “Who’re you?”

“I’m Y/n, one of your teammates.” You answered.

“Really? Didn’t think Levi would ever choose a comrade so ugly and annoying.” She continued, though facing your two ex-friends now: “C’mon girls. Have you ever seen her actually do anything? She spends all the training just drooling at our Captain.”

You looked at her in utter confusion, turning to your friends as Hange grabbed your wrist and dragged you away from the pathetic blondie.

“Who the fuck does she think she is?” You hissed.

“Hey Y/n, calm down, you’re overreacting. I swear she’s nice, you just need to get used to her.”

“So what, you’re like defending her now?” You scoffed, not wanting to believe your best friend of a lifetime was turning against you.

“Why? Can’t I? She’s my friend.” Hange replied.

“You’re my friend too!” You spat back.

She didn’t say anything, so you took that as your cue to leave.

You locked yourself in your room and didn’t get out for hours, crying and sobbing because it suddenly felt like you were unwanted and unloved, just like the first time you’d come here.

You needed some fresh air, so you decided to head out for a ride with Lily. Just as you got out of the building, you heard some loud chatter and a faint smell of marshmallows coming from the other side of the building.

You followed the noise, realizing it came from the porch were you usually ate dinner around a fire with your friends, before the whole Natasha-thing happened.

You hid behind a pillar, recognizing all your friends’ voices, trying to recompose yourself in order to go see what all this was about without letting your troubled side show.

The first thing you saw were your friends in a circle, rounded around a fire, roasting marshmallow on wooden sticks. The next thing, though, is what hurt you the most: Natasha was sitting on a boy’s lap, kissing him passionately, her marshmallow long forgotten on the ground. As they separated themselves to catch their breath, giggling like high schoolers, you recognized your Captain and love of a lifetime as the one who was kissing her. He was looking at her so affectionately, completely focused on her and with a love sick look in his eyes you’d never seen him with.

Is this what your friends had been doing every night behind your back?

Tears streaming down your face, you stomped in the area, all your friends suddenly noticing your presence as the chatter ended in a matter of seconds.

Nobody dared to look at your fiery eyes, opting to look at the ground instead.

“What is this?” You broke the silence, venom in your words.

Hange was the first one to get up, trying to get your wrist like she always did when she wanted you to calm down. “Y/n please.”

“Oh don’t you Y/n me! You hung out together, leaving me out  for all this time, not even once thinking about asking me to join, when I’ve been inviting you to eat together every single day.” You said, words latched with anger.

“We can explain, please Y/n!” She pleaded you, but you slapped her hand off of you, repelled by her.

“No, we don’t need to explain ourselves to her, do we guys?” Natasha had rose up to her feet, facing you with a smug smirk.

“She’s right Y/n. Can’t we have other friends? Or do we have to spend every second of our lives with you?” Petra argued, going to stand by her new friend.

“Spend every…What the heck you guys? I’m away for one day and you all suddenly hate me?” You were trying as hard as you could to not let your emotions get in the way, but it was noticeable how your voice had cracked mid-sentence.

“We don’t hate you Y/n. We’re just tired…” Gunther answered lazily, not tearing his gaze away from his half burnt marshmallow.

“Of what Gunther? Tired of what?”

“Of you Y/n! Don’t you understand? They’re all sick of you trying to always be the center of attention, you’re useless and you act so childishly and god, you’re so damn emotional!” Natasha said.

You simply stared at them, tears pooling in your eyes and body trembling as your mind wasn’t able to register what was happening. All your greatest fears were coming to life: your friends had turned their back on you and hated you with all their guts. They’d eventually leave you and you’d become the same lonely loser you always had been.

“We’re sorry we had to break it to you this way, but she’s right, Y/n. We’re tired of you.” Erd finally spoke up, his voice lacking the usual warmth you once found comfort in.

It felt like the air had been sucked out of the room. Your chest tightened, a suffocating weight pressing down on you. Their words rang in your ears, over and over again, slicing through you like a thousand tiny blades.

Your lips parted, but no words came out—just a sharp inhale, like a drowning person gasping for breath. Your fingers clenched into fists at your sides, trying to steady yourself, but it was pointless. The trembling wouldn’t stop.

Then, your eyes found him.

Levi stood there, arms crossed, his usual unreadable expression in place. He hadn't spoken, hadn’t even looked at you properly. But what shattered you completely was what he didn’t do—he didn’t defend you. Not once.

Because he didn’t care.

Not about you. Not like you had hoped.

Not like he did for her.

Natasha was standing close to him, too close, her hand brushing against his arm as she smirked at you, victorious. And Levi let it happen. He let her claim him, let her act like she belonged by his side.

A choked sob escaped before you could stop it. You felt the tears spill over, warm against your cheeks as your body moved on its own.

You ran.You pushed past them, ignoring Hange’s desperate call of your name, ignoring the sting of their words echoing in your mind.

Your feet carried you blindly through the hallways of the barracks, past flickering candlelight and empty corridors, until you reached the safety of your dorm.

Slamming the door shut behind you, you collapsed onto your bed, burying your face in your pillow as the sobs wracked your body.

You had never felt more alone.

You had lost them.

And worst of all… you had lost him.

The next day you woke up with a throbbing headache, eyes puffy from all the crying and snot filling your nostrils.

You sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the ground, your heart heavy and tight. You could hear their voices outside your room—Levi and Natasha laughing, talking easily. Your stomach twisted.

The sound of it was enough to send you spiraling into a pit of self-doubt.

You’d spent so much time pushing those feelings down. Trying to convince yourself you were strong, that you weren’t someone to get lost in jealousy, but now, it was impossible to ignore.

You wrapped your arms around yourself, trying to shut out the thoughts that swirled in your mind. Natasha was everything you weren’t. Beautiful. Confident. Easy to talk to. And Levi... Levi always looked at her like she was perfect. You could see it, even when Natasha wasn’t around. It was the way he smiled when she walked into a room, the way his gaze lingered just a little too long.

He’d never look at you like that.

Your fingers ran through your hair, the weight of the realization sinking in. The truth you refused to see until now was clear. Levi would never love you the way he loved Natasha. He wouldn’t even have to think twice about it. Natasha had everything—beauty, grace, strength. All you had were scars, insecurities, and the weight of your own broken heart.

You’d never been able to see yourself the way Levi saw you, and now... now you didn’t know how to make him see you differently. You weren’t enough. You were never going to be enough.

Your breath hitched as you looked in the mirror. Your reflection was a stranger—a girl who had tried so hard to fit in, to pretend she was something she wasn’t, to make herself worthy of the things she could never have. You weren’t Natasha. You’d never be Natasha.

Your fingers brushed the scars that marked your skin—physical reminders of all the things you’d lost, all the parts of yourself you could never get back.

And then there was Levi.

You knew you could never ask him to choose you over Natasha. Natasha was everything you weren’t. She had beauty that drew people in, confidence that made everyone love her. You didn’t have that. You were just... ordinary, bruised, broken.

"He doesn’t love me," you whispered under your breath, your voice barely audible. "He loves her.”

A bitter laugh escaped your lips, and you hated yourself for feeling this way, for being so weak, for letting your insecurities get the best of you. But it was undeniable. Every time you saw the way Levi looked at Natasha, you couldn’t help but feel like you were competing with a version of yourself you could never reach.

Your heart felt like it was cracking. Maybe you’d fooled yourself into thinking he could love you.

Maybe he did, but he would always love Natasha more.

Your chest tightened, the tears starting to blur your vision. You wiped them away angrily.

No, you couldn’t be this girl. You couldn’t let jealousy take over. But the truth was clear now. Levi would never see you the way you wanted him to.

With an agonizingly slow pace, you got ready for today’s mission: you and the rest of the Levi Squad were going to head out of the Walls. You couldn’t leave now, not when the formation included you as a spotter for Titans, but perhaps you could free them of your presence after the mission.

You didn’t go to breakfast, stomach closed and eating having become only a small problem at the end of the list of the things you had to fix, or end, in this case.

With an empty look in your eyes, you headed to the stables, finding your teammates also getting ready for the mission.

They were silent, though for once, you didn’t want to break the silence. You started to realize how much it was valuable: it wasn’t something you needed to fill anymore, but something that filled you.

You sensed their apologetic looks, Natasha’s victorious smile and Levi’s usual cold yet troubled gaze, but you kept your eyes trained on the ground in front of you, or on the surrounding land once you were out of the walls.

As you were returning after a long day of scouting, a group of Titans approached you, running at an insane speed.

“They’re catching up on us!” Petra exclaimed, terror filling the senses of you all.

“What do we have to do Levi?” Natasha asked her new boyfriend.

“We have to keep riding, let’s hope we can reach the walls in time.” He replied.

“We’re never gonna make, they’re running way faster than usual!” Erd said.

“The Captain told us to keep riding, so shut up and do what you’ve been ordered to!” Gunther scolded you, putting everyone back in position.

Suddenly, the Walls came into view: you’d made it, you were going to live!

Your hope was quick to die however, as you looked back and saw the Titans at barely miles apart. They would have reached you before you could make it back.

You were all going to die! You had to do something!

You took a long breath, a peaceful smile appearing on your face.

“Why are you smiling? We’re going to die!” Petra asked you, worried.

“No you’re not. You’re not going to die today…” You’d made your decision, yet deep down, you’d always known. You loved your friends and cared about them too deeply to let them die at the hands of such monstrous creatures. Even though they had all been little sh!ts to you in the past few days, they were all the most loving and caring souls one could find inside the walls. Without looking back, they’d offered their lives, sacrificing their future for a greater good, in order to save Humanity, even though nobody was there to save them. They were skilled warriors and Humanity would already have been destroyed it it weren’t for their work. They were far more valuable than you were, and Humanity couldn’t lose them. You would rather have them and your parents alive but sad, than everybody dead because you didn’t have the courage to do what needed to be done.

“Just know that, I love you guys, and I’ll always carry you in my heart, no matter what you’ve done or said. Oh, and tell my parents I love them too, alright?” You continued your last speech, realization dawning over your friends as they looked back at you in horror.

Too late did they start yelling your name, for you’d already slowed down your horse to a walk, turning to face the group of beasts.

“Keep riding! She’s saving us! Don’t let her sacrifice be in vain.” Levi yelled, urging his horse and companions forward, closer to the walls and further from their friend.

You watched as they disappeared from your view, nothing but little black dots in a sea of green, a few tears trailing down your chin.

This was it, the end. If you’d known you would’ve died so soon, you probably would’ve hugged your parents tighter that day, but it was too late to regret your choices now. Your time had arrived, you may be forgotten, but you would have done your job to keep humanity safe for a bit longer. A determined look fell on your face, as you turned around to face the Titans. You were going to die, you were sure of it, but you sure as heck weren’t going down without a fight!

Hiii! Thank you so much for reading! I hope you've appreciated this post. I'll start working on Part 2 as soon as possible but do tell if you have any specific requests! You're more than welcome to come check out my account with my other posts and/or make requests(MASTERLIST). Do NOT plagiarize this or any of my content.

Love you guys! See you soon!😘

Written by crazycat010 © 2025 crazycat010

[babykittenteach]

A couple extra notes about the theft post, and then I kinda hope to be done making any posts. I swear this is not a drama blog. I'm Todd in the Shadows taking a break from music videos to well actually James Someton and then hopefully never doing it again. Cut for length, no reblogs because I'm not trying to get anywhere with this except explaining some thoughts.

No one's really brought this up in reply to me, but just to be clear in case anything sounds like claiming ownership over ideas: being inspired by other people is normal and good. You are supposed to be, I would argue. Particularly, when we're in fandom and these are all transformative works. When I've made a piece of art, if it was inspired by someone else, I am going to be mentioning them. I ask authors if they don't mind art, I tag people who inspired things and link to their posts, etc. etc. I'm happy to do that. Not just because it's the right thing to do, but I actively enjoy getting to use art as part of an ongoing media conversation. I like getting positive attention and little numbers that go up for my work, yeah, but that's not why I'm driven to draw or write. I'm trying to express something in me to other people, and I hope they respond. I can't imagine trying to hide that conversation. Especially if it means I can foist off blame for something cursed onto someone else. Helpful guide by unadulteratedkr here, btw. See, this is a very easy thing to do, linking.

Further, I make art. Occasionally. Allegedly, I even write. I am 100% certain something I've made has been similar to something that already existed that I just wasn't previously aware of. That happens. It's normal. I accidentally did that with my username. I don't think random coincidence things like that are plagiarism or even necessarily a bad thing. If you find out later that someone had already done something and you want to be clear about it, just add like a little note? But most of the time it's obvious people just had similar ideas. It's not, for instance, an ongoing behavior stretching months and at times being "literally saw the original 11 minutes ago" or "kudos'd the original last night."

Like, for real, fuck this guy. I glossed over this in the post, but reaching out to me like that privately when he found out I also write was almost certainly groundwork. If I may explain: I talk to people a lot about things I make because they come say hi. That's normal, it's lovely, it's good, it makes me happy. Please do not for one second get suspicious of normal people who are, even when the world is this fucked, by and large good. I promise most people are good. This guy used a good and normal thing for another purpose, like someone hiding a hand buzzer in a handshake. People are good; that guy's an asshole. I don't think for one second that normal human interaction was why Atticus reached out to me the way he did. Given what I know about how he talked to other people and how he justified his bad behavior to them, with more and more examples of this popping up from newly revealed private interactions, he was using the access and the good faith of apparent friendship to get things and get away with things. After almost a year of my being in the fandom, that was the first time he'd slid into my private messages and it was probably to test the waters. See if I was going to gush back, see if I was hungry for approval, etc. because then I'd be easier to jerk around. You make excuses for people you look up to; you make excuses for people who give you something you need. That's what he did, and I'm not saying that to lecture anyone; the opposite. It's why he got away with things, because people want friendship and approval. It's why, even after one of the most frustrating fandom periods of my life, I genuinely am sorry for people who got jerked around even when they didn't want to hear me out.

If someone hurts you and tries to guilt you into forgiving them with shit like "our friendship means so much to me" and [insert medical or mental health reason here] instead of just admitting they fucked up, please please please please please pleasepleasepleasePLEASE be careful with them. When I hit the block button on him, I even sent the prediction that he would make a post about it to friends. He hit the "i thought we were friendly" and the "I'm so stressed about--" points real quick. If I had bothered to explain it to him, it would have looked like all the other Didn't Mean Tos he's been revealed to have done. Please have more respect for your feelings than he did.

tl;dr-- okay but no, really, honestly, truly fffffffffffffffuck this guy. I hope to not make another post about this. If you need to, you can dm me here or on Discord, babykittenteach there too.

[chezmad]

Opposites attract

Pairing: Pre-borderlands Suguru Niragi x Female reader

Summary: Ayumi, deciding to go out for the night, finds herself thinking about one thing and one thing only.

Warnings: Ayumi getting lit

Part 8 Drunk in love

-

Niragi had spent the entire weekend lost in thought, questioning everything about his existence. She had told him she was going out with her friends on Saturday and would be spending Sunday nursing a hangover. But to him, the weekend had felt like a turning point. He’d never felt so deeply connected to anyone, so intimately close. He didn’t understand how she could carry on with her weekend so nonchalantly, as if nothing had changed.

His mind kept drifting back to the weight of her body pressed against his, the way he could touch her anywhere, the way he was finally receiving something he’d longed for years.

That Saturday night, she sent him a photo of herself. She wore a tight, black lace dress that seemed to emphasize every curve. All those thoughts he’d once pushed to the back of his mind—thoughts he’d considered inappropriate—suddenly felt valid, even right. He stared at her face, then at the body he had held the night before, as if in a trance.

You look pretty

Ayumi smiled down at her phone, unable to hide her delight.

"What are you smiling at?" Kumi, her best friend, noticed the soft expression.

Ayumi bit her lip, turning her gaze back to the mirror. "A boy."

All three of her friends turned to face her, their eyes wide with surprise.

"Huh? You haven’t talked to a boy since Haru! Are you finally getting back out there?" Kumi asked, astonished that Ayumi might actually be moving on.

"I know, I know," Ayumi admitted, her smile widening. "But I met a cute boy in the library."

The girls gasped collectively.

"And I went to his house last night."

"Where have you been hiding this guy, Ayumi?" One of her friends, already tipsy, swayed and gestured dramatically.

"Guys, you know I’m secretive." Ayumi turned her head, a playful blush creeping up her cheeks, though she half-regretted not telling them sooner.

Ayumi wasn’t the type to talk about herself much. She preferred to listen to others, always playing the role of the quiet observer. When it came to boys, she didn’t share unless things were official. Past experiences had made her hesitant to open up—there had been too many times when the boys she’d been involved with shared their private moments with others. It led to cruel gossip, and she’d been labeled with words she never thought she deserved. What should have been fun, carefree girl talk became the fuel for gossip, and it was a kind of exposure Ayumi hated.

The girls understood that talking about boys wasn’t her thing, so they never pushed her. But seeing how happy she had seemed recently, they knew it was time to finally broach the subject.

As the night wore on, they found themselves at their favorite bar, the one with good music and a laid-back vibe, far removed from the crowded spots full of rowdy university students.

After several drinks, the group was dancing, swaying their bodies and laughing a little too loudly. Ayumi loved her friends, but Kumi had always been the one she felt closest to, the one she trusted the most. So, as they danced together, Ayumi’s mouth started to run, a little too freely under the influence of alcohol.

"I don't know, K... I think you might find him weird, but I like him... so much," Ayumi slurred, her words tumbling out.

"No, Ayumi," Kumi replied with a slight hiccup, her voice full of warmth. "I can already tell... this boy is... like, so good for you."

Ayumi slowed her dancing, a hint of hesitation creeping in as she prepared to let Kumi in on a secret she wasn’t sure she was ready to share.

"Kumi," she started, her voice softening as she turned to face her best friend, looking slightly mischievous.

“I’m really fucking horny,” Ayumi raises an eyebrow at her.

Ayumi could hardly believe that was the first thing that came out of her mouth. There was so much more she wanted to say, but she couldn’t get it out without bursting into laughter.

Kumi starts to giggle. “Is that seriously all you had to say? If that’s the case, so am I, bitch.” The girls laugh, people start looking over as if they are crazy.

“No, no. Like, I’m horny and have a boy’s house I could go to.” She holds Kumi’s hands, hoping she’s not going to disappoint her too much.

“So you want to go back to your man’s house?” She pouts a little.

“Maybe.” Ayumi bites her lip, slightly scared of her friend’s reply.

“Urgh!” Kumi rolls her eyes before lifting her hands to cup Ayumi’s face. “If you leave me here and don’t fuck him, I’m gonna be disappointed.”

Ayumi had let it slip that she hadn’t actually had sex with him yet.

Ayumi stretches her arms out, smiling at Kumi before slipping away into a corridor in the club.

She pulls her phone out.

The phone only rang twice before Niragi answered.

Hey

O-oh, hey Ayumi

Ayumi knew the next thing that was going to come out of her mouth was totally inappropriate. She saved herself the fall.

Can you answer the message I’m about to send?

Oh sure

Ending the phone call, she began writing a half-decent message.

I’ve bored lol, can I jump in a taxi to yours?

She knew she was pushing her luck, but she was tipsy and could only think about one thing. Him.

Niragi walked mindlessly around his room. This was starting to get serious—like a very serious situation. Like almost a relationship. A girl was out with her friends and was now getting a taxi back to his place to crash?

Sure, just let me know when you’re here, yeah?

He thought his message sounded polite and like a gentleman. He hoped that Ayumi wasn’t going to assume he just wanted her for one thing. What if she just wanted a place to sleep for the night? Niragi had been worrying about her anyway; he wanted her to at least be safe.

Ayumi went back to find her friends and say her goodbyes.

“Right, bye baby.” She sneaks up behind Kumi, kissing her cheek.

“Bye, girlies.” She blows them kisses before leaving.

The taxi ride back was slightly depressing, like after every night out when you’re starting to sober up and think about all the embarrassing things you did and how much money you spent.

She had a slight buzz—one that made her speech sloppy and her vision blur—but other than that, she was a heavyweight and definitely in a state to be responsible.

Five minutes until her destination, she messaged Niragi, saying she was about to arrive.

She waves at Niragi, shutting the taxi door behind her.

“Are you okay?” Niragi asks, sounding slightly concerned.

“Yeah, why?” she says as she approaches him.

“I don’t know, did something happen with your friends?”

“No, Niragi.” She laughs slightly, fixing her dress.

“Why did you want to come back then, and specifically to my dorm?”

“Niragi, you ask too many questions.” Ayumi laughs, her drunkness slightly speaking her sober thoughts.

She walks up to him, their feet almost hitting each other. She raises one hand to his chest.

“Am I not allowed to want to see you?” She does a fake pouty face, tilting her head at him.

She made his knees weak, the way she had such a way with her actions. He still had a lot of learning to do, especially with taking hints.

She moves her hand from his chest to his hand, guiding him inside his own dorm building.

Authors note: I’m soooo sorry guys I had all my mid terms and i’ve been stressed out my MINDDD but enjoy this i decided to cut it at the good part SORRY but at least you guys have something to look forward to🫀🫀🫀

[valyrfia]

I'm sorry but your words about Hamilton and immigration come across as nothing but hollow, same for your other posts propping up progressiveness.

You didn't even block the one friend who openly uttered out vile sexist shit to defend a billion dollar company and its white men, the friend who didn't even bother to apologise to the victims of having suffered through that in their workplace. Instead they got told to just suck it up.

Practice what you preach too! You don't even have the guts to block an asshole with no remorse. We minorities speak out and your friend instead of empathizing with the racial aspect jumps to bullying the minorities instead.

You are part of the problem of the privileged white people who are very good at writing words but can't even cut out the real prejudiced people in your actual life. One of your friends favourite mutual told one of my mutuals to go back to Africa from where they came from. That's what Hamilton stands for I guess.

Next time you write another of these walls of texts, reflect on how you have done nothing to help us minorities and women at all if the company you keep is this.

Jesus Christ. Okay since you keep sending me increasingly frenzied asks I will address it ONCE publicly. I want to add quickly I don’t owe you facts about my real life to prove anything, but my blood BOILS for you to try and make moral judgements on me without knowing anything about me. It’s easy online, behind a screen. I’ll put a full reply below the cut since you don’t want to engage with me via DMs.

I want to make the point especially though that want to know the identity of the mutual that made that absolutely abhorrent comment. I obviously don’t want those people anywhere near my circle. Please just send an ask with the username if you don’t want to message me. I had no idea about any of this and I want that person blocked and gone from my sphere.

In terms of my friend, I’ve told her all this so I’ll air it, I never agreed with her gossip blog since my defence of the WAGs is well-documented, I hoped that was clear. I don’t agree EITHER with the Max fans interpretation of the Lewis comment and I blocked some mutuals who I don’t know the real names of who were being overly nasty about it. In terms of the person whose real name I know and vice versa, we have had full discussions about this and accountability and remorse was expressed to me privately, I have no clue or no time to keep up with the ins and outs of other blogs and again I hope I get a little bit of grace that it is lot harder than just a block button for me.

In terms of the Hamilton comment, this blog is my blog and my journal as much as everything, I post every damn thing that comes into my head sometimes. My expression was one of grief for the attitudes of my own country, in which I am an immigrant. A privileged immigrant but an “other” nonetheless. I’m not American and it was never supposed to be a point about any American politics.

I hate me having to prove any sort of point but I have a. suffered sexual assault and b. endured harassment in the workplace based on my gender and sexual identity. I don’t talk about it because it’s painful and vulnerable but do you really think my words were hollow about those subjects? If I seemed distant it’s because I make an effort to put distance because yes, my own experiences cut deep and I really don’t talk about them to even my closest friends. Sorry that rang hollow to you, internet stranger who doesn’t know my life.

Again, I don’t like having to prove my activism nor my politics but I do loads of stuff I don’t talk about on here. Protests, petitions, canvassing, mediation, speeches. I don’t talk about any of these things on here because this is my F1 blog where I come to have fun. Also, F1 itself does NOT align with my politics, the horrible classist racist patriarchal stench of it all polluting the Earth is TOUGH to swallow.

I think the summary is I’m not sure what strange conclusions you have drawn about my goodness or morality based on a blog that is a tiny part of my much fuller life, but I hope you’ll appreciate we’re much closer aligned than you previously thought and I’m very much not your enemy. If you think I’m a performative horrible hollow person then I don’t think there’s anything I can do to sway you on that one. Just feel free to block me.

[lemotmo]

It's very clear at this point, people

Q. I guess my question is why the need to bring him back? I mean they broke up, he serves no story purpose.

A. He absolutely serves a story purpose. Look I talk a lot of trash about the guy because the actor who plays him repulses me on every level, but the character serves a genuine story purpose. The problem was Tim didn't stick with the original story plan and it allowed the story to get a bit muddled to the point that it created an opportunity for certain people to try and hijack the intended narrative. Tim mentioned a jealousy aspect in an interview prior to the season. For whatever reason between then and now he decided to go a different way. I have no idea why he decided against that story point because it was always going to be the easiest, most straightforward way to get the audience from point A to point B. It also would have made it much easier to get Buck and Eddie to their individual realizations at similar times within the story. It was a mistake to decide not to go with that particular route, and I would love to know why he changed his mind. I know most of us got to a point where we didn't want Tommy anywhere near any kind of Buddie realization, but the reality is that Tommy was always intended to play some part in Buck's realization one way or another.

The dialogue between Buck and Tommy in episode 8x11 was really, really telling. Tommy is the ultimate Buddie plot device. But because Tim kept dragging the story out all while not giving Tommy or the relationship any actual screen time, focus or development, because their relationship was never the point of anything, people kind of filled in the blanks with their own version of events. Lou did not help the situation because he encouraged people to believe a version of the story he knew wasn't true, but the show wasn't really doing anything to countermand the noise, early on Tim actively encouraged some of the chatter, something he later learned was a mistake. Yes the storyline was pretty straightforward if you were bothering to pay actual attention, but this is the problem with continually kicking the Buddie can down the road for later. Things started and stopped several times. And each time the progress stalled Lou was ready, and more than willing to fill the silence with his version of events. 8x11 was Tim basically resetting the narrative to the way it was originally intended to play out.

Tommy's one job was to make Buck aware of the Eddie of it all, and Tim finally had him do that in this last episode. Having Tommy be the one to verbalize for the audience that the BuckandEddie thing is something that does need to be reexamined and looked at with a new perspective, while at the same time admitting that he viewed Eddie as competition set everything up for the audience. Then having Buck react the way he did and say what he said, 'I don't want to have to sleep with everyone I have feelings for and I don't have feelings for everyone I sleep with' told the audience the entire game. Buck has clearly thought about Eddie like that at some point, and made himself shutdown and lock that train of thought away, and he didn't appreciate Tommy reminding him of that. The show used the second part of Buck's dialogue to explicitly state that Buck has no actual feelings for Tommy. It was physical for Buck. And this is the first time Buck has admitted that out loud. It was something Buck had to admit to himself, and Tommy, but it was also something they wanted the audience to be aware of. As far as Buck is concerned there is no competition. He will pick Eddie every single time, even if he believes it can only be in a platonic way. Tommy was used as the character to tell the audience that it might not have to be platonic. The relationship part of Buck and Tommy officially ended with that episode but I do think we will see Tommy at least one more time. The focus will now switch to Eddie, and there are several things they need to do with Eddie prior to any kind of feelings realization on his part. My guess is they will sort out the Eddie and Chris situation, and the Diaz parents thing and then address the Buck of it all out loud. Ryan and Oliver both saying that we will see phone calls and FaceTime calls between the two makes me really happy. The idea that the show might do another Buck and Abby parallel and kind of show both Buck and Eddie allowing themselves to fall for one another while talking on the phone is a really lovely idea. And I really hope that's what they're doing because not only would that be a really special thing to allow the audience to witness, it allows the realizations to occur within the same episode. I got sidetracked here, lol, but personal feelings for Lou aside Tommy always served a story point the show just pushed his purpose to this past episode. But they made his purpose clear, try as some people might to pretend they didn't.

Thank you Nonny!

Well said Ali! The show is finally ready to address the Buddie elephant in the room and so far I've loved every single second of this storyline.

As for Tommy? Uh-uh, the Buddie plot device is there to do its job and he did it well in 8x11. I'm sure he'll be off plot devicing some more in 8x14/15. I cannot wait to watch it and say goodbye forever to T. 🙂‍↕️

IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[blackcatxmagic]

When Felix began to brush his fingers through his hair, Leo closed his eyes and leaned into it like a dog or cat might when being pet. He didn't even care how that may have seemed, and he told Felix, "I love when people play with my hair." Then he opened his eyes and grinned at him, laughing as he clarified, "I mean, within reason of course. I don't want strangers doing it. You though...you have permission to do so anytime you want." There was something about the way Felix looked at him that made Leo feel truly seen, and while it made Leo feel a little exposed too in a way he wasn't used to, he honestly didn't hate it. Somehow this goofy, adorable person had broken down at least some of his barriers. He couldn't stop smiling as Felix complimented him, laughing as he replied, "Careful or else this is all going to go to my head, and I don't need a bigger ego." Smirking, he teased, "Yeah, the hair is pretty fantastic. Probably the best in Cardinal Hill, let's just be honest about that." His arm still around Felix, Leo leaned over and kissed them on the cheek again, an uncommon affectionate gesture on his part that Leo had now done twice in just a few minutes. "I get the feeling that anyone would be easy to talk to for you," he said, grinning at the other.

Nodding, Leo confirmed, "Yes, a little bit of everything," and he knew without a doubt now that he had to see Felix again, and soon; Leo wanted to see them in his clothes and then out of them, among other things. "You'll have to let me try one of yours," Leo told Felix. "I'll let you wear some of my clothes too, especially my underwear. Fuck, even the thought of that, well..." He looked down, where it was very clear just how much Leo liked the idea of Felix in his underwear.

"Yeah," Leo replied, taking a bite of his breakfast. "I used to live in Santa Fe, or just outside it actually, this little place called Madrid. Now I'm not sure if it was a town or just like...a part of the city. We weren't there very long, maybe six months." Really Leo hadn't lived anywhere long, with Cardinal Hill being the longest apart from his first seven years in India. He picked up on the way the lights flickered, and judging by the way Felix paled when that happened, Leo could tell what had caused it. "Hey, it's okay," Leo reassured him, he grinned as he made the lights flicker once more. "Sometimes I get 'dizzy' too," Leo said, making air quotes around the word dizzy. This made it pretty clear what he meant by that, but it also wasn't too overt just in case Leo was wrong about Felix. "Speak some Spanish for me," Leo said. "I bet it sounds sexy. I know some of a lot of different languages since I've lived all over the world, but I'm only fluent in Hindi and Gujarati. Well, and English too obviously."

Even though his back was to Felix as he made coffee, Leo could feel the other's eyes on him, and he smirked; it made him feel sexy, and he enjoyed the fact that Felix liked what he saw. "Aren't you sweet enough already?" Leo asked, laughing, but he nevertheless grabbed his sugar bowl from the counter and placed it in front of Felix. Standing next to them again, Leo leaned down and stole a kiss, smiling against Felix's lips as he pulled away. "Yeah, definitely sweet," he remarked. The other's question caught Leo off-guard though, and he didn't immediately know what to say. But the way Felix grabbed his hand grounded Leo, and he gave it a little reassuring squeeze. "I guess we'll see come December," Leo responded finally, "but...the sex was good. The sex was very, very good." Then Leo leaned down and kissed Felix again, but this time it was more passionate, his tongue slipping into the other's mouth, hand on their cheek, and Leo smiled once again when he pulled away at the sound of the coffee pot beeping. "Coffee's ready," he said, smirking.

‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎  Before they could stop themselves, they reached over and combed their fingers through Leo’s hair, smiling. “Your hair is very nice. I wouldn’t say that’s what did me in, though.” Felix gave him a slow once-over, taking in the tousled mess of his hair, the easy smirk, and their smile softened. “I suppose it was that charm.” They thought back to the moment they sat at the bar, and how Leo had immediately come over and offered him a drink. “You’re… really nice, too. And funny. Easy to talk to.” When they realized they were two seconds away from rambling on, they said, “But yeah, no. Definitely the hair. I’m jealous.”

‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎  They laughed, shaking their head. “So what I’m hearing is that we’re gonna have to try a little bit of everything.” Felix wasn’t sure what the future held for the two of them, but they knew they wanted to see him again. What caused them pause was that they really wanted a repeat of the previous night - that was new. “I wear a lot of turtlenecks, I bet you’d look cute in one.”

‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎  They stopped mid-bite as Leo revealed he’d been to their home state. “Wait, you have?” Their eyes lit up and they shifted in the chair, facing him. When they got excited, they talked with their hands, and now was no exception. “Which area? I’m from Taos, which is in the mountains, so it gets hot, but not as hot.” As they gestured about, Leo would notice two things: one of the lights flickered, and then the blood drained from Felix’s face. Felix and magic did not mix well. They covered their face, groaning. “Mmm. Sorry, I, uh, get a little dizzy sometimes. But, yeah, New Mexico.” Once they felt normal again, they continued, “I also speak Spanish, but I didn’t start learning until I was a little older, so I really sound like a fish out of water when I speak it.”

 ‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎  When Leo got up to make coffee, Felix let their gaze linger on him a little too long, only snapping out of it when he spoke again. “Oh, I take mine dangerously sweet,” they said, smiling. “Enough sugar to send me into another plane of existence.” Waiting for the coffee, they raised an eyebrow at Leo’s comment. “Cardinal Hill is pretty magical, really.” When Leo returned and placed his hand on their shoulder, they reached for his hand and started tracing his fingertips. “You know, luminarias are usually made during the holiday season. Was the sex that good that you’re willing to stick around until December?” Realizing what they said, they moved their hand back and rubbed their neck, blushing.

[leashybebes]

fuck it friday

alriiiiight, tagged by @bidisasterevankinard, thank you beloved. here's some mostly dialogue i wrote in a fugue state over my lunch break inspired by things 👀👀👀(🤡)

Hen waves her hand in a keep him talking gesture and Buck nods, squeezing Tommy's hand.

"I'm so sorry," Tommy sobs. "God, in a - in a lifetime of shitty decisions, it was the worst mistake I ever made. Evan - Evan, I'm so sorry. You made me so happy. You woulda made me so happy if I just - fuck - if I just let you."

"Hey, hey, c'mon. It's okay. I got you, Tommy, it's okay."

Tommy tries to shake his head, and Buck braces him to stop him.

"Listen," he gasps out. "Listen to me. You didn't do anything wrong. You're brave and you're beautiful and you're - you're so good, Evan. It wasn't your fault. You didn't - you didn't do anything wrong. You don't need to feel guilty or - "

"H-hey, stop it," Buck says. "We're not doing that. I know you're a movie guy, but we're not doing dramatic goodbyes, okay? We'll talk. We'll talk in the hospital, okay?"

Tommy's teeth are chattering. He looks grey. But he's determined to get more heartbreaking words out, apparently, so Buck squeezes his hand and soothes him through it.

"'m s-s-so s-s-s-self-ish," Tommy says.

"What? What do you mean?"

"I'm so - Evan, I'm so glad you're here."

"Hey, hey, me too. Wouldn't be anywhere else. Just hold on, babe, it's gonna be - "

"So - so glad I got to s-s-see y-y-you." Tommy laughs wetly, and it makes an awful noise rattle through his chest. "'m such - such an asshole."

"No you're not, Tommy, of course you're not."

Tommy's eyelids flutter, and then they close.

"No, n-no, come on, Tommy, eyes on me, baby please," Buck begs.

"On three," Hen says, and Chim shoves Buck aside to help her.

Tommy's hand falls from his, and Buck tries not to think about last times.

no pressure tags for @beanarie, @ambernotember, @hyperfocusthusly

[the-ships-to-rule-them-all]

the level at which people are misusing the term "Never Again" in the far left absolutely infuriates me.

"Never Again" doesn't refer to the idea of no more genocides -- unfortunately people are evil and corrupt and seek scapegoats and destruction, there were genocides in the years following the Holocaust, there were genocides 10 years ago, there are multiple genocides going on as we speak

"Never Again" means we as Jews will pay attention to the warning signs, will not mindlessly allow antisemitism to fester and take over our communities, we will fight back. it means we will be proud. it means we will not let you hate us without a word of refusal.

"Never Again" is a warning for us, it is a reminder that what happened then can happen now -- is happening now. The Far Left doesn't get to use it against us. You don't get to turn our tragedies into hate-speech and antisemitic rhetoric.

Am Yisrael Chai

[icewindandboringhorror]

examining a seemingly normal image only to slowly realize the clear signs of AI generated art.... i know what you are... you cannot hide your true nature from me... go back where you came from... out of my sight with haste, wretched and vile husk

[wild-at-mind]

Not to talk about MRA-lite spaces again but I'm going to need everyone to understand that in these spaces, the subtext of 'men don't get to talk about their problems' is ALWAYS 'and it is women's fault!'

[uwuthomasuwu]

The universe loves me

[fingertipsmp3]

Ughhhhhhh I hate writing and I hate not writing and I hate myself

[july-19th-club]

all of this is like immaterial anyway bc my throat is raw enough this morning that i might just stay home like. i dont want to go somewhere and use up all my spoons on anxiety and new situations when i could save them and have them for work tomorrow if i need them