#i actually do in fact in real life have great clocking skills i can tell very well if a woman is a lesbian in particular

[lesbianlenas]

i was watching a movie w my friend yesterday & it was so funny. i have a habit of making gay jokes during movies obvs and that is usually me saying a character is either gay or a lesbian all the time and i did that last night w this guy character i was like he’s gay. and i kept saying that throughout the movie and in this scene a girl kissed him and i paused it and i was like as a joke he’s going to say “um i’m gay?” and then he legit said 😭 “you know i’m gay right?” and we both like DIED laughing bc i am like 90% of the time wrong when i call a character gay bc i will just say it abt anyone really and the times i’m right r when it’s like really obvs and in this case they led you to believe he was not gay before he said that 😭 my mind my gaydar is off the charts as always

[scamrisk]

Modern Millionaires Review

TheMMSaaS & Modern Millionaires Review (2023 Update): Are These Gurus Legit?

The new income app “MMSaaS” is a software promoted by the modern millionaires Chance & Abdul and they say you can make money online with it.

It’s essentially a CRM called “leadific” that you can sell to small business owners for a monthly rate of $299, and by doing so, start creating passive income.

But before they give you access to this CRM, you will have to join their Modern Millionaires program. So that leaves us with one question, is this opportunity the real deal?

Before writing this review, I’ve spent several hours reading through its customer complaints on various platforms such as BBB, Google, Youtube, and Trustpilot.

Now, I do want to be totally transparent in this review, so… 

DISCLAIMER:

This Modern Millionaires review has been thoroughly researched with information and testimonials that are available to anyone in the public. Any conclusions drawn by myself are opinions.

PROS

Chance and Abdul have an impressive track record

No previous skills are needed

This business model has great potential

CONS

The program has a hefty price tag

There are overhead that will add up before you

Additional costs can anywhere from $300-400 per month

WHY LISTEN TO US?

My name is Josiah, and this is my Dad, Joel.

Together, we make up the team here at Scamrisk.

If you’ll let me bother you for two minutes, I’d like to quickly explain why I’m even here writing this review.

In early 2020, I had just graduated from college & had no real career prospects. 

I knew I was destined for something more, but I had no clue how I was going to make it happen.

I had this sinking feeling in my gut all the time… like the “big man upstairs” had accidentally given me the version of life where I’d be mediocre forever, instead of the one where I was, ya know – happy & fulfilled.

Anyway…

I had fiddled around with some different online businesses in college:

Some random MLMs, a bit of affiliate marketing, a (failed) dropshipping store or two, all the usual suspects.

Even my dad had been involved in MLMs back in the day… selling knives & other random nonsense people (probably) didn’t need.

All I really wanted was to find something that was going to actually work for me.

Maybe those things had worked for others, but for me it all turned up a fat “0” in the bank account department.

So I searched! And searched… and searched… and searched…

And eventually, I somehow stumbled upon a program that promised to help me build an income online (read about it here if you’re curious).

I didn’t really want to be “rich”.

The thought of making a reliable $5K per month & not having to worry about clocking in to a 9-to-5 ever again was all I needed.

Sure, there were people in the program doing high-6 and low-7 figures per year… but that wasn’t what I was out for.

I just wanted to provide freedom for myself, and if I was lucky, take my family along for the ride.

Fast forward a few days and a few phone calls & I was enrolled!

Here’s the first “money making website” I put up:

I built that site in 2020, and it still makes me $1,500 per month. It’s a basic 5 page website I built based on a template the program provides.

The best part to me? My dad and I get to do it all together!

So between the:

Ease of reaching $5-$10K per month in income online

Straightforward-ness of the system to do it

Fact that I get to do it w/ my family

Is why I recommend local lead generation as my #1 business model for making money online.

Sure, it takes some work and dedication – but anyone that tells you that there’s a business out there that requires no work is selling you a lemon.

I’m not saying you need to sign up for the same program I did, but I would definitely recommend giving the business model a peek!

Modern Millionaires is an ad agency course. The basic premise is that you’ll learn how to build your own ad agency, land clients, and get them results.

Running an agency (even though they’re a bit of a commodity nowadays) isn’t a bad way to get your feet wet in the world of online business.

That said, there are a lot of moving parts with this business model:

Prospecting – you need to know how to find potential clients

Sales – you need to know how to convince those clients to give you money

Media Buying – you need to know how to run ads profitably

Copywriting – you need to know how to tailor your ad messaging for the right customers

Design – you need to know how to design ads/landing pages to maximize conversions

Email Marketing – you need to know how to follow up with prospects and customers

Automation – you need to know how to connect everything properly

Now, most course-sellers will try to make this easier on you by telling you they’ve managed to “automate everything”, offering “plug-and-play” campaigns, and “pre-built templates”.

Here’s the thing though:

Markets are always changing. 

They get more savvy as time goes on.

If you buy a program with thousands of other students, where everything is built out for you, there’s an almost 100% chance those templates don’t work.

Why? 

Because if thousands of other students are using those exact same “plug and play” campaigns, tens of millions of people have already seen them, reducing their effectiveness.

Not to mention, with most agency programs, the templates are actually built by some virtual assistant in the Philippines or India, and have never actually been tested in real life.

And if they have, there’s a good chance they’re extremely outdated, since most programs don’t bother updating their templates after launching. The course creator gets too busy just trying to sell to more and more students, instead of focusing on quality education.

Now, here’s the most sinister part of this whole thing:

Most course creators market their agency courses as something you can do anywhere in the world. You might hear them say things like “The world is my office” or “This is a simple passive income business”.

That’s just plain false.

Running an effective agency is in no way passive. Look at the list above, and remember that you can’t rely on pre-built templates. You’re responsible for every part of the process.

Does that really sound like a business you can do from a laptop on the beach?

See how this could be a problem?

Now, what if there was a way you could build a passive income stream that’s actually passive?

An income stream that doesn’t require:

Mastering 100 different roles

Needing to be a technology wizard

Working around the clock just to keep things from blowing up

An income stream that brings in consistent revenues every single month (from a couple thousand dollars to well over $10,000)?

An income stream you could actually build in your spare time, and grow as large or as small as you want to, without having to spend hours a day chasing, selling, or managing anything?

If that sounds like something you’d be interested in, check out Digital Real Estate. 

However, if you’d still like to know more about Modern Millionaires and are wondering about the MMSaaS income app, keep reading…

TheMMSaaS Income App Is It Legit?

Before we dive into the rest of Modern Millionaires and what you get in the program itself, it’s important for us to mention their SaaS update.

If you watched their webinar you’ll recall that they offered a D4U system in which you pay them $18,995 and they set up 10-30 weekly appointments where you can sell their SaaS called Leadific.

Leadific is a CRM that clients can use for their own business to track their own leads in an easy to see pipeline.

Leadific costs $299 per month and the gurus boast that you can keep 100% of that commission.

Now that all sounds great…

But as you’ll see from other consumer reviews down below, they are very disappointed in the quality of the leads and don’t make much sales.

Beyond that, try and remember why you were interested in something like modern millionaires in the first place…

You wanted financial independence.

A life with no boss.

A life with no outward control over you.

Well, Chance and Abdul are basically your new boss.

Keeping you from going out and being as independent as you really wanna be…

What you really would be is a fancy looking employee that’s really working for their white label agency.

That’s just the unfortunate truth of the matter. With them you just won’t have that independence you seek.

So What Does Selling Leadific Look Like?

According to their webinar, if you’re a good fit for their partner program, they will give you Leadific to sell to small business owners.

It’s unclear what they mean by “if you’re good fit”…

We’d wager that really means “if you have enough money”.

But they’ll set up the appointments for you!

They claim 10-30 appointments and assume you’ll close at 20%.

What this doesn’t account for though is no shows or cancellations…

Let’s say best case scenario you get 30 appointments, if industry standards are anything to go off of, you’re looking at a 50% no show rate to these set appointments.

Which slashes down your money making opportunity to 15 calls per week at best. Of those calls you have to close 3 to hit that 20% rate.

Now closing 3/15 might sound super easy…but honestly explaining techy CRM stuff to business owners is a lot harder than Chance and Abdul make it look. Not to mention 15 shows would be best case scenario…

Either way most business owners only care about one thing and that’s “how do I get more leads in the door”.

That’s why digital real estate is such a great model. Business owners are looking for people with that skill.

They aren’t necessarily looking for people trying to sell them an CRM that they won’t even know how to use…

Something else that is unclear in the webinar is whether or not that 20% close rate is a requirement or not.

This is where we start to feel MLM like vibes.

Most MLM companies require you to first buy a product demo kit and then you must use that demo kit to go out and make sales. If you don’t hit certain numbers you lose your spot as a rep.

Other MLM companies will allow you to sign up for free and they’ll send you a kit. However, if you also don’t hit certain sales numbers, the company will run your card and you’ll pay for the kit yourself.

We say all this to ask the question:

Will Chance and Abdul charge you for Leadific if you don’t hit certain sales numbers for them?

Remember, just like an MLM…you’re now employees of Chance and Abdul and businesses have to be profitable right?

If they’re sending you leads and you’re not closing them, do you think they’ll keep you around for long without somehow getting their moneys worth?

Another tough thing to grasp from their webinar is how they present selling Leadific so easy as a beginner…

You see, the modern millionaire gurus might be able to sell something like Leadific really easily themselves because both of them use CRM’s on a daily basis and know how to navigate it for a prospect.

You however, would be selling a product that you really haven’t used or know how to use proficiently.

And if it’s one thing business owners can sniff out, it’s nervous people, and they know the only reason why someone would be nervous is if they don’t have confidence in the product itself or the ability to use said product themselves.

Either way, you’ll lose the sale if you don’t have full confidence.

That’s something we would have liked to see addressed in their webinar.

But at the end of the day they are still trying to SELL YOU into their networking business so we understand why they didn’t address certain points that may cause you some doubt.

No different than when a car company selling a fast car doesn’t tell you about the awful gas mileage…

So now that we’ve talked about their “money making app” a little bit, let’s jump into the actual modern millionaires training review.

What Is Modern Millionaires?

Modern Millionaires is a program that shows you how to start your own local lead generation business by using Facebook and Google ads.

Mainly, it shows how you can make a social media marketing agency. You’ll be producing leads via Google ads which they like to refer to as “online billboards”.

While the course does discuss different niches you can go into, the primary focus for this course is lead generation as your own business and developing passive income.

We’ll get into why it isn’t as passive as they say later on in this review.

Who Are The Creators Of The Modern Millionaires Course?

The names behind the Modern Millionaires are Abdul Samed and Chance Welton

Both are unknown in this internet coaching business.

Abdul and Chance have produced several businesses from scratch. Chance is productive in marketing and advertising, whereas Abdul is more along the lines of digital businesses, lead generation, and producing income.

Abdul and Chance complement one another nicely on this particular training course, and each of their skillsets brings something different to the program.

After I’ve done the research I’ve come to the conclusion that they’re not lying about the effectiveness of the business model….but I do question their ability to coach…

I question why Forbes actually showcased them, have they completed something extraordinary? No…

I suspect that Chance and Abdul purchased that section from Forbes and that’s why it’s no longer up.

What Is The Modern Millionaires Business Model?

This training course is based upon running Google ads for business owners.

Basically, you contract yourself out and help businesses grow via marketing. Not a bad idea at all…but does this specific course carry value? I have doubts.

What Is The Modern Millionaires’ Course Content Actually Like?

Module 1: The Foundation

Within the 1st part, everything is kept simple and beginner friendly. You are going to learn exactly how to start your business from scratch.

The primary focus because of this module is going to be on choosing your niche and also creating your agency site (including purchasing your domain name). This domain name is vital in getting clients.

Also, there’ll be a considerable amount of discussion on being in the proper state of mind for operating a business.

Essentially, this particular module is about providing you with the inspiration that you simply need to have to be successful in starting an online business.

Module 2: Prospecting And Sales

It’s in module two that they begin to get into the meat and potatoes of their program. Here’s a brief overview.

This module is kickstarted with a breakdown of what prospecting truly is. When that’s out of the way, you will learn the right way to research the market you wish to work in and learn a little bit about the way an internet CRM works.

The second part is extremely significant since your entire business model is constructed around prospecting the client and generating leads; and how you can control them.

After that, they talk a little bit about how cold emailing works. This is something that’s uncommon to find in other courses like it.

Many actually ignore the entire cold emailing thing.

Therefore, I see this as a benefit from the simple fact that the Modern Millionaires Course is prepared to discuss much more special methods to produce leads.

You’ll likewise find out how to prospect with LinkedIn, how to take payments, and also how you can finalize deals with clients that you’ve picked up.

The training skims over the offer finalization part, which happens to be a disappointment because this whole business model does fall back on sales and your ability to get your current clients to spend more with you.

This may be hard in case your sales game isn’t on point.

Module 3A: Driving Traffic With Google Ads

This is definitely where the meat on the course is. In this particular module, as the title indicates, you’ll learn how you can use Google Ads to generate traffic and in turn, leads.

This is most likely the most in-depth module I’ve seen so far on Google Ads, and the powerful duo leaves no stone unturned in coaching you are shown exactly what you need to know to produce leads from it.

You’ll likewise find out about exactly how Google Analytics works into the puzzle that is starting your own business successfully.

Module 3B: Driving Traffic (Facebook)

This mini module is very much the same as the main module, just this time; you’re going to be utilizing Facebook Ads to produce leads instead.

Module 3C:

The last module brings the previous two modules together.

In this lesson, you will learn the right way to develop those leads and, ideally, hand those off to business owners that will be a paying client for you.

Module 4: Auto-Pilot

The last module teaches all the automations you can put in place to make this passive. This talks about getting employees, training them, and so on.

Unlike other courses and programs that tell you to run the business yourself for a while before automations, Chance and Abdul encourage you to outsource as soon as you can.

I have mixed feelings about this.

On one hand, I think outsourcing is good and ultimately the end goal for anyone so they can have that time freedom they desire.

On the other hand though, I do think it’s valuable to run your business and know it inside and out before putting automations in place.

I am also weary of potential upsells being the reason why they push you to outsource. I imagine they might want you to outsource to them through their own white label agency.

Leading to even more money in their pocket.

At the end of the day though, I want to believe they have the students best interest at heart.

Can You Really Make Money With Modern Millionaires?

Yes, you may really make money after purchasing the program, but it’s still lacking in information and support.

In fact, as of writing this article, I’ve seen several customer complaints about the Facebook group having no activity and very little interaction with Chance or Abdul.

Of course, you can make money, but the cost of this course is just too much for the value received in my opinion.

But before that, let me clarify why this particular business model could really allow you to make good money.

The Good & The Bad

The Good:

The Modern Millionaires program was developed by Chance and Abdul, with each accomplished rather a remarkable quantity of success in their own individual labels. They’ve showcased in Forbes.

There’s no prior experience needed for using this program – you do not have to have a background in online advertising or even have any unique marketing skills already.

The business model of the Modern Millionaires (AKA Officeless Agency) is a viable and common-sense method to make money through Google Ads and Facebook Ads.

The training is of decent quality, and you could arguably receive your money’s worth.

The Bad:

The prices seem pretty high considering you get very little access to Chance and Abdul at best.

The expenses do not stop with the training – additional costs incorporate digital advertising on your own. You will have to pay everything yourself until you have a client offsetting your costs.

There’s no promise of success – you may never see your money again.

You will find hidden costs not disclosed during your assessment phone call, and it may be an extra cost of $300 to $400 monthly.

Understanding The Modern Millionaires Business Opportunity

The majority of the business owners don’t understand how to run ads.

They don’t understand the way to create a website and draw in visitors to it.

They’re way too preoccupied for all this.

I like the business idea – I just don’t believe in the coaching.

Does Modern Millionaires And The MMSaaS Income App Have Support?

Alongside the online training course, you can find many support systems. At least systems they’re supposed to have anyway…

The main support piece you’ll be a part of is their sales call with you. However after they have your money, that’s where support arguably seems to stop.

They promise a private Facebook group and some good coaches as well, but honestly, from everything I’ve seen so far online… it doesn’t look like that kind of support is available anymore.

In fact, if you paid attention to that webinar you may have watched before reading this, you’ll notice the dates of the coaches lap top date back to November of 2020…

Pretty outdated at this point I’d say.

Why not show us what your Facebook group looks like for this year?

I think that’s a reasonable question.

What Does The Internet Have To Say About Modern Millionaires?

Online, it seems as though Chance and Abdul don’t have the best reputation. They have some 5 star reviews online, but I’m personally always skeptical of 5 star reviews that are short and simply say something along the lines of “best course ever”.

Personally, I like to head over to reddit and see what the people have to say. In my opinion, the odds of fake comments/reviews are much lower.

Here’s what I found:

Of the multiple users on the thread, one says:

“This is definitely what we call a “bait” tactic. These guys are just trying to make more money off of other peoples naivete. If I were you, I would try to reinvent the focus of your husband on something more productive. Typically, things like these are simply just scams because in reality, people succeed due to a lot of variables that they can not control that end up going their way; therefore, can not be replicated again in the exact same way at the same time and at the same place.”

Not off to a great start…another user chimes in and says:

“DONT WASTE YOUR MONEY. This course isn’t a magic pill. And despite the shiny ads, becoming a millionaire isn’t simple or fast. If you are on hard times and don’t have a few thousand on hand to burn without it torching your household finances or wrecking your relationship, DONT DO IT. The “value” they offer isn’t worth the price tag. I’ve taken a course from these guys. They’ve changed the name now but the ad strategy looks similar. Being completely honest, I dearly wish I hadn’t given them my money. For all the millionaire talk, the course was not professionally filmed or produced – it looked like it had been shot on a desktop camera or iPhone. Except for a couple of ads – I mean, those have to look super shiny – gotta look like millionaires after all…Not that that’s a deal breaker by any means. Their support wasn’t super supportive. When I needed help, one of them was almost always on some epic hike or mountain climb (no cell service), and the other was frequently on vacation. Again, that’s not a deal breaker. But the content was meandering and repetitive and not edited well. Basic takeaways: little bit on FB ads, website SEO, Insta ads. The major gist, and one I had a huge problem with, was this: whatever you don’t want to learn or feel like learning bc you’re not good at it, go hire yourself a team on Upwork/Freelancer/Fiverr. And if you’re a complete putz like I was, you’ll put it on your charge card hoping somehow you’d hire right the first time and not have people literally eat through all your credit with little to nothing to show for it. If I had known that this was the advice I was paying for, I’d be a good $8k richer right now. Again, I wish I hadn’t spent my money. There are MUCH better courses out there. Hell, I’ve take MUCH better courses out there. I’m just mad at myself for taking this course in the first place and wasting the money I couldn’t really afford to spend. Listen – if you’re in a financially desperate situation, don’t be stupid – don’t buy this course! Don’t be me. Get a steady job somewhere, doesn’t matter where. Wait tables, pour coffee, bartend. Get your money situation STABLE. BE SMART. Slow and steady wins the race. Then, if you’re able to squirrel a little money away every month to pursue your dreams, do it that way! Don’t wreck your family, don’t ruin your relationships. Don’t buy this course and sacrifice all that. It’s not a magic pill. You’re only making a couple of strangers on the internet richer with YOUR money.”

That one was pretty rough, but informative. It also confirms the nearly $9,000 price tag I listed earlier. Maybe they give you a “fast action discount” of $1000 if you join on the call?

There is one positive comment though…

“I am part of the program and I can tell you its legit! I was sure it was a scam too until I decided to go for it and there’s all sorts of training involved, it takes a lot of work and time but they aren’t giving anyone money. They’re selling a business model that they teach and then you implement. I havent made my first client yet but I can say for sure its real”

While it’s nice to see a positive review, I can’t help but notice that they said they haven’t landed a client yet. Usually when people join something new, they are pretty excited. Right now I wonder if the user holds the same excitement despite no clients…

Is Modern Millionaires And The New MMSaaS Income App A Scam?

So, is Modern Millionaires and the New MMSaaS Income App a scam?

Not technically.

You can make money with this program, but it’s definitely not as easy as Chance And Abdul makes it sound.

There’s a ton of work to be done upfront, no real guarantee of success, and – most importantly – running an agency is extremely active income (NOT passive).

Now, there’s nothing wrong with front-loading the work and making the money later.

But if you’re getting into this game to live life on your terms, travel the world, and generate passive or semi-passive income from anywhere, then this isn’t for you.

What if, instead, you could put in a couple hours a day (in your spare time) to build a single digital asset, and your reward was a $500 to $2,000 payment that came in every single month?

And what if you could get started today and have your first payment in a week?

And what if you could double it next week?

Well, that’s the power of Digital Real Estate. 

And, unlike a traditional ad agency, you can legitimately do this from anywhere. It’s a true lifestyle business.

Your laptop and an internet connection is all you need.

Some of the most successful students in this program run their entire 6-figure businesses from:

A camper in the middle of the woods

A beach chair on the water in Mexico

A small villa in Greece

They’re able to travel around, living their lives first, and focusing on their income second.

Because even if they stop working for an extended period of time, the money keeps coming in. 

So adventure, memories, and experience are the top priority.

And they never have to worry about how to pay for the next trip, or consider asking for time off.

If this sounds more like the type of life you want to lead, just click here to find out more about Digital Real Estate.

How Much Does Modern Millionaires Cost?

According to their webinar, they currently have 3 different pricing tiers.

The first pricing tier is what they call their “DIY Package”.

This package is listed for $7,995.

In this package you’ll receive all the training videos, access to the private Facebook group, and livestreams.

You will not get one on one coaching however and are left to “do it yourself” as the name suggests.

The second pricing tier is what they call their “DWY Package”.

This package is listed for $12,995.

In this package you’ll receive everything you do with the DIY package, but additionally you’ll receive some smaller, more private group coaching from one of Chance and Abdul’s coaches.

This however, is still not one on one coaching and earns the term “done with you” as the name implies.

Their 3rd and final pricing tier is what they their “DFY Package”.

This package is listed for $19,995.

In this package you’ll get everything from the first two packages plus one on one coaching from a coach assigned to you by Chance and Abdul and the opportunity to sell their Leadific SaaS product by getting leads they generated, sent straight to you to close. They claim 10-30 calls per week.

So what do I think about all this?

Well to be honest, the pricing is fairly steep. And even at the highest pricing tier, you still do not get one on one coaching from Abdul and Chance themselves.

That is certainly disappointing in my opinion.

Instead, you are handed over to a coach that is promoted as someone who has their own agency that earns 10k per month…but there is not exactly any confirmation on that.

If they do run their own 10k per month agency and have decided to coach you, that’s great, but there is also the chance that they are just people hired by Chance and Abdul to hold your hand no different than college professors do.

And you know the old saying…

“Those who can’t do, teach”.

Ultimately my main issue with these different levels of pricing is that NONE of them provide that one on one interaction with Chance and Abdul.

You see them on the front end of their ads. Is that the last time you’ll ever see them?

How You Can Purchase The Modern Millionaires Training Course?

Unfortunately the only method of purchase for Modern Millionaires is to hop on a call with one of their sales reps after you go through their long webinar styled sales funnel.

If for whatever reason you forget what the price is, the sales guy will direct you back to the webinar and then tell you to call them back.

I think this is kind of ridiculous and comes off to me as that they only care about money.

I do not like it.

However, sales process aside, they use this call to find what’s best for your budget.

That being said, the more money you have, the more they try to push you to the higher priced offer where you are able to sell Leadific for them.

As a final note on the purchasing of Modern Millionaires, their sales process in my opinion focuses more on getting money out of your pocket and into theirs instead of focusing on educating you on digital marketing and properly starting your own online business.

Are There Alternatives To Modern Millionaires?

Yes, there are plenty of other business models to choose from if you want to pursue this making money online.  Here are just a few:

Local Lead Generation

Digital Real Estate

SEO

Real Estate

Website Building

What Is Our #1 Recommendation For Making Money Online In 2023?

The ScamRisk team has spent months researching, reviewing, and vetting dozens of business models and thousands of programs.

While there may be no “perfect business”, the research IS conclusive:

Digital Real Estate is the #1 online business model for those just starting out.

Whether you’ve never made a dollar online, or you’ve been in this space for a while but never really “made it,” Digital Real Estate is for you.

Why?

1) It’s Flexible: got an hour a day? You can do this. Ready to drop everything else and dive in full time? You can do this. Yes, the more time you put in, the faster you see results. But even with a little time each day, you can move the needle in a Digital Real Estate business.

And because this system is so flexible, you don’t have to constantly be working to make more money. It’s called PASSIVE INCOME because if you stop working, the money doesn’t.

Imagine taking 3 months off to just tour around Europe, rent a cabin in the woods to write a book, hike the Appalachian Trail, or live on the beach and surf all day.

This is only possible if you have an income stream that’s not tied to your time.

2) You Own & Control EVERYTHING: With an ad agency, you don’t really own anything. You’re a hired gun for clients, and entirely at their mercy.

Sure, you own your agency, but if your business grinds to a halt once you stop working, all you really have is a self-created job.

With Digital Real Estate (a passive income stream), you own all the assets, which means you have all the power and all the control.

3) Little To No Startup Costs: It’s possible to get into Digital Real Estate with zero dollars upfront. Because, using the strategies outlined in this program, you can get a client to pay you BEFORE spending a penny out of your own pocket…even before you do any work.

Even without getting paid in advance, you can have your first Digital Rental Property up, running, and generating profits for less than $100.

4) Easy To Duplicate: Ok, here’s the best part: once you have your first Digital Rental Property up and running, you can literally DOUBLE your income with a few clicks, a couple keystrokes, and a single phone call (and you don’t actually need the phone call).

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[ailuronymy]

do you think every disabled character in wc is handled poorly? i understand theres def some cases of ableism but at the same time when i hear ppl say that its usually bc the disabled cat wasnt able to become a warrior due to their disability. and i feel like ppl forget, that not everyone irl CAN do what they want after they become disabled. ex. someone wants to be an athlete, but their legs have to be amputated. a cat like briarlight esp i feel is p realistic and could be a source of comfort

Hello there, thank you for writing in. I’m going to reply to this question with a series of questions I think are a bit more useful, given what you’re trying to ask me. I hope that’ll clarify what is a deeply complex, multilayered issue. 

Do I think Erin Hunter handles anything in the series “well”? Not really. I don’t have a high opinion of the work of the collective and, broadly speaking, I think every right note they play, metaphorically speaking, is an instance of chance rather than effort, skill, or intention. Stopped clocks are right twice a day, mediocre writers will sometimes do something cool by accident, similar principle. That’s not to say Erin Hunter hasn’t ever done anything on purpose--just that overall the underlying drive of the series isn’t so much quality as it is quantity, and speed of production, and it shows. 

Do I think Erin Hunter puts any significant research into how they portray disability? No. I do not think it is a priority for this series. They’re not trying to make a meaningful work of literature, or capture a realistic experience of disability, or tell especially impactful or thoughtful stories, or even make a particularly good or coherent fantasy world. Warriors is a specifically commercial product that was commissioned by HarperCollins to appeal to a particular demographic of drama-loving, cat-loving kids. It’s not really trying to do anything but sell books, because it’s a business, so the text in many ways reflects that. They’re not going for disability representation, in my opinion. They’re including disability in many cases as a plot-point or an obstacle. 

Do I think this means that people can’t connect to these characters and narratives in meaningful ways? No. Often I say that a work is completed only when it is read. Before that point, it doesn’t have a meaning: a reader finishes the work through the act of reading, and interpretation, and filling in the spaces and resonance of the story with their own values and experiences. When people talk about subjectivity, this is what they are talking about. What this means in the context of disabled characters in Warriors is that these characters and their stories can be multiple, conflicting, even mutually exclusive things at the same time, to different people, for different reasons. 

Do I think characters have to be “good” to be significant to someone? No. I think genuinely “bad” (i.e., not researched or poorly researched, cliche, thoughtlessly written, problematic, etc. etc.) characters can be deeply meaningful, and often are. Ditto above: for many people, and especially marginalised or stigmatised people, reading is almost always an act of translation, wherein the person is reading against the creative work of the dominant culture in a way that the author likely didn’t intend or didn’t even imagine. There’s a long documented history of this in queer culture, but it’s true for just about everyone who is rarely (or unfairly) represented in media. Disabled people often have to read deeply imperfect works of fiction featuring disability and reinterpret them in the process--whether to relate to a kind of disability they don’t experience themselves but which is the closest they’re offered to something familiar, or to turn positive and meaningful what is intended as narrative punishment, or simply to create what’s commonly called headcanon about “non-disabled” characters who echo their personal experiences. 

Do I think everyone has to agree? Extremely no. As I said before, people will actually always disagree, because all people have different needs and different experiences. What can be interpreted as empowering to one person might be very othering and painful for another. There is no “right” answer, because, again, that is how subjectivity works. This is especially true because marginalised communities are often many different kinds of people with different lives and needs brought together over a trait or traits they share due to the need for solidarity as protection and power--but only in a broad sense. It’s why there is often intracommunity fighting over representation: there isn’t enough, there’s only scraps, and so each person’s personal interpretation can feel threatening to people whose needs are different. You can see examples of this especially when it comes to arguments over character sexuality: a queer female character might be interpreted as bisexual by bisexual people who relate to her and want her to be, while being interpreted as lesbian by lesbians who also relate to her and want her to be like them. Who is correct? Often these different interpretations based on different needs are presented as if one interpretation is theft from the other, when in fact the situation is indicative of the huge dearth of options for queer people. It becomes increasingly more intense when it comes to “canon” representations, because of the long history of having to read against the grain I mentioned above: there’s novelty and, for some people, validation in “canon” certainty. And again, all of this is also true for disabled people and other stigmatised groups. 

Do I think this is a problem? Not exactly. It is what it is. It is the expected effect of the circumstances. Enforced scarcity creates both the need for community organising and solidarity and the oppressive pressure to prioritise one’s self first and leave everyone else in the dust (or else it might happen to you). The system will always pit suppressed people against each other constantly, because it actively benefits from intracommunity fighting. Who needs enemies when you have friends like these, and so on. A solution is absolutely for everyone in community to hold space for these different needs and values, and to uplift and support despite these differences, but it’s not anyone’s fault for feeling threatened or upset when you don’t have much and feel like the thing that you do have is being taken away. It’s a normal, if not really helpful, human response. But until people learn and internalised that the media is multifaceted and able to be many things at once, without any of those things being untrue or impacting your truth of the text, then there will be fighting. 

Do I think my opinion on disability on Warriors is all that important? No, not really. I can relate to some characters in some moment through that translation, but my opinion on, say, Jayfeather is nowhere near as worthy of consideration than that of someone who is blind. I don’t have that experience and it’s not something I can bring meaningful thinking about, really. That’s true for all these characters. If you want to learn about disability, prioritise reading work about disabled rights and activism that is done by disabled people, and literary criticism from disabled people. And as I mentioned above, remember that community isn’t a monolith: it’s a survival tactic, that brings together many different people with disparate experiences of the world. So research widely. 

Finally--do I think there’s only one kind of disabled narrative worth telling? No. For some people, a disabled character achieving a specific, ability-focused dream is a good story. For other people, a story that acknowledges and deals with the realities, and limitations, of disability is a good story. The same person might want both of those stories at different times, depending on their mood. That’s okay. Sometimes there’s power and delight in a fantasy of overcoming seemingly impossible obstacles and defying all expectations. Sometimes there’s value and catharsis in a narrative that delves into the challenges and grief and oppression experienced because of disability. There’s no one truth. 

To round all this off, I’m going to give my favourite example of this, which is Cinderella. I think it’s a great and useful tool, since for many it’s familiar and it’s very simple. Not much happens. In the story, she is bullied and tormented, until a fairy godmother gifts her over several nights with the opportunity to go to a royal ball, where she dances with a prince. The prince eventually is able to find Cinderella, due to a shoe left behind, and they are married. In some versions, the family that mistreated her are killed. In others, they’re forgiven. 

Some people hate the story of Cinderella, because she is seen as passive. She tolerates the bullying and never fights back. She does every chore she’s told. She is given an opportunity by a fairy godmother, and she doesn’t help herself go to the ball. She runs from the prince and he does the work to find her again. Eventually, she’s married and the prince, presumably, keeps her in happiness and comfort for the rest of her life. 

For some, this story is infuriating, because Cinderella doesn’t “save herself”: she is largely saved by external forces. She is seen as a quintessential damsel-in-distress, and especially for people who have been bullied, infantalised, or made to feel less capable or weak, that can be a real point of personal pain and discomfort. 

However, for some others, Cinderella is a figure of strength, because she is able to endure such hostile environments and terrible people and never gives up her gentle nature or her hope. She never becomes cruel, or bitter. She is brave in daring to go outside her tiny, trapped world, and she is brave to let the prince find her. She doesn’t have to fight or struggle to earn her reward of happiness and prove her worth, because she was always deserving of love and kindness. The prince recognises at once, narratively speaking, her goodness and virtue, and stops at nothing to deliver her a better life. 

Depending on the version, the wicked family disfigure themselves for their own greed--or are punished, which for some is a revenge fantasy; or Cinderella forgives them and once again shows her tenacious kindness, which for others is a different revenge fantasy. 

The point? Cinderella is the same character in the same story, but these are almost unrecognisable readings when you put them side-by-side. Which one is right? Which one is better? In my opinion, those are the wrong questions. I hope this (long, sorry) reply is a set of more useful ones. 

[princesssarisa]

How "Cinderella Monogatari" Could Have Been Better

I've just finished watching the 1996 anime series Cinderella Monogatari ("The Story of Cinderella"). I'll share my overall thoughts on it later, after I've overviewed a few other versions of the fairy tale. But for now, I'll say that I liked it very much. That said, it does have its flaws. Below are the handful of changes I would make to improve it.

1. Have Cinderella's father be presumed dead through most of the series.

It's awkward to have Cinderella's father still be alive, and not a weak henpecked husband, but merely away on business. Why would Duchess Dalbin so extensively abuse and degrade her stepdaughter knowing that the girl's devoted father will eventually come back? I would have preferred for the Duke to leave on his business trip, and then, a few weeks later, have the family receive the news that his ship was wrecked in a storm and that he's missing and presumably drowned. Only at this point would the Duchess start to abuse Cinderella. This could also add a layer of depth to the Duchess's character. She could be portrayed as genuinely in love with her husband and distraught by his "death," and afterwards she would exclude Cinderella from the family because Cinderella reminds her too much of him, similar to what the 1997 version of the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical implies. But in the final episode, the Duke would come back and reveal that he survived after all: he's just taken this long to recover from his injuries and find a ship home. So we'd still have the blissful family reunion the actual series gives us, but with even more emotional weight.

2. Give Duke Zaral consistent motivation.

I like the series' addition of a "Greater Scope Villain" (to quote TVTropes) in Duke Zaral. But at least in the English dub, his motive seems to change completely at random from "Marry his daughter Isabel to Prince Charles and become the real power behind the throne" to "Murder Charles and force his parents to surrender the kingdom." This could be easily solved, though. Simply place the episode "The Disturbing Painter" (his first real attempt to kill Charles, when he tries to have his portrait painted by an artist who traps his subjects' souls in the painting) after the episode "Traveling Toward Happiness" (where his daughter Isabel runs away with her true love) instead of before. Since the series makes it clear that Zaral really does love his daughter, it would make much more sense for his murderous turn to be caused by losing her, especially if he found out that Charles had helped her elope. To quote TVTropes again, it would be his Villainous Breakdown, and it would give him a real character arc.

3. Cut the episode "Prince Charles's Secret," where Cinderella and her stepsisters are forced to work as maids in the castle.

While of course it's funny to see the stepsisters forced to do the same chores they usually heap on Cinderella, the context is ridiculous. If a wealthy duke like Zaral wants maidservants to spy on Prince Charles, why doesn't he just pay real working-class girls to do it? Why on earth would he insult a family of his own social class by tricking a duchess's daughters into visiting the castle only to have them forced into servitude? And afterwards, why does no one ever mention it again? Realistically, wouldn't a trick like that cause a scandal? The whole scenario is contrived and would be better off cut.

4. Make Cinderella less of a damsel in distress.

Now there's no shame in a heroine not being a fighter or needing to be rescued. But it's still a tiny bit tedious to see Cinderella repeatedly being captured or endangered and Charles repeatedly being the strong one who rescues her. Even after he teaches her how to swordfight in "Lets Get Rid of Those Bandits," she never uses the skills she learned in that episode again, particularly not in the finale when she's captured by Zaral. I say remove Charles from some of the episodes where she's endangered and have her rescue herself instead. Have her use the fencing skills Charles taught her throughout the rest of the series, particularly when she's kidnapped in the finale. Not that she needs to use a sword, but at least she could defend herself with a stick or some other improvised weapon. In the climactic battle with Zaral on the clock tower, I'd have Cinderella and Charles fighting him together rather than just Charles. Again, I'm not saying there's any shame in being a damsel in destress, but it would be more interesting to see Cinderella defend herself at least a little bit more.

5. Have the stepfamily rip Cinderella's dress before the ball, as in the Disney version.

The scene where they rip up her invitation to the ball is already a blatant knockoff of the Disney dress-ripping scene, but without the same power. So why not take the imitation all the way and have them rip her dress as well as the invitation? This would also enhance the next scene where Fairy Godmother Paulette works her magic. In the actual series, the fact that Cinderella is already wearing a fancy gown and Paulette's magic just brings its style more up-to-date is slightly underwhelming. We lose the sheer magic of the dress transformation that other versions of Cinderella have. If her dress were in tatters, this would be rectified.

6. Don't have Charles fall in love with the "mystery girl."

Cinderella retellings that give Cinderella and the Prince most of their romance arc before the ball always have a dilemma: what to do with the plot point of the Prince not knowing his beloved's name or where to find her after the ball? Some versions have found good solutions; this one is mediocre. After his series-long slow-burn romance arc with Cinderella, it's awkward to see Charles become enamored in one night with the girl at the ball, whom he doesn't know is Cinderella. Even if it is just because she "reminds him" of Cinderella, whom he thinks will never speak to him again because he lied about his identity, it still seems ever-so-slightly fickle. I'd prefer to have him only regard her as a friend with whom he can confide about Cinderella. Then, after the ball, instead of being depressed about her disappearance, he'd be depressed because Cinderella "never showed up" even though he invited her. But Alex and Hans would mistakenly think he was moping over the mystery girl and set out to use the glass slipper to find her.

7. Give the stepfamily a gradual redemption arc.

Maybe this is what the series was trying to go for, because there are assorted episodes where Cinderella does especially valuable things for her stepfamily (saving Jeanne's life when they're lost in the woods, learning to swordfight and guarding the house against the bandits, risking her life to find healing herbs for her dangerously ill stepmother, etc.) and momentarily earns their respect. But in every new episode, they're back to abusing her. So in the last episode, it feels very abrupt when they start being nice to her after she's betrothed to Prince Charles. If it were played for laughs like in the 1957 version of the Rodgers and Hammertein musical, and they were clearly only sucking up to her because she was the princess-to-be, it would feel less awkward, but it's not played for laughs. It feels as if we're supposed to see it as a genuine, heartfelt family reconciliation, which is completely unearned. And then when Cinderella's father the Duke comes home, they all reunite as one big happy family and the Duke never even learns that his wife and stepdaughters abused his daughter while he was away!

My solution? Put much more emphasis on Cinderella's gradually earning her stepfamily's respect over the course of the series. Don't have them forget the great things she does for them; have call-backs to the fact that she saved their lives, risked her own safety for them etc. Show them increasingly torn between their jealousy of her and their growing respect and gratitude toward her. While they would still have a final "Kick the Dog" moment by tearing up her mother's dress and her invitation to the ball, I'd show them feeling very guilty as they ride away in their carriage afterward. Maybe Jeanne could ask Catherine if what they did was right, and Catherine would reply that they had no choice, Cinderella looked too pretty, the Prince would have ignored them if he had seen her, etc.; but clearly she wouldn't be so sure. Then, after Cinderella reunites with Prince Charles, there could be a scene similar to the opera La Cenerentola, where Charles would publicly berate the Duchess and her daughters for their treatment of Cinderella and threaten to punish them somehow, only for Cinderella to declare that she forgives them and beg her fiancé to pardon them. This would move them to tears and they would finally, profusely apologize to her for all they had done. And when the Duke comes home, Cinderella's choice not to tell him about their abuse could be emphasized as her way of showing faith in their repentance and giving them a second chance.

I realize that all this would probably take up more than just a few minutes of the final episode. So because we've already cut the earlier episode where the stepsisters work as maids at the palace, I suggest we add a new Episode 23, in-between the actual series' second-to-last and final episodes. This entire episode would take place between the slipper-fitting and the royal wedding, and it would open with her reunion with Charles and end with her reunion with her father. Everything in between would be devoted to her reconciliation with the stepfamily. This would be a much more believable, satisfactory conclusion for them than what the actual series gives us.

It's a good series, but with these changes, in my personal opinion, it would be even stronger.

[themadauthorshatter]

... I think you guys are going to like this.

358/2 Days REWRITE Part 2

Riku is around, but he's all over the place, and he has a mission: Find and capture either Roxas or Xion, unless he CAN manage both, so DiZ can use them to help Sora recover. He's on a time limit, though, because Sora's heart is damaged and the longer Roxas and Xion are around, the less likely Sora is to waking up or even sleeping; I mean, he'll BE sleeping, but it'll be much quieter and it will be absolutely pointless to try waking him up.

For the first few days or months, he keeps his distance, trying to decide who he's picking, sadly.

Pros of bringing Roxas to DiZ: He has the closest connection to Sora, being his nobody, he's got the keyblade, Riku can probably take him one v. one, if there are any problems, he just needs to get a reaction out of 'Sora.'

CONS of bringing to Roxas to DiZ: Have fun trying to run from the remaining Organization members, he'll have to avoid Non-form or he'll get beaten all to Hell, he runs the risk of hurting his friend for reals, Roxas is rarely alone, Roxas is one hell of a runner and fighter, he'll just feel bad.

Pros of bringing Xion to DiZ: She has more 'keyblade' potential, maybe her voice will help wake up Sora(?), she looks and sounds like Kairi, Naminé gets a new friend(as long as DiZ doesn't decide to throw her away).

CONS of bringing Xion to DiZ: She looks and sounds like Kairi, she's crazy skilled, she hits hard, she's laughable when she's mad, but it's gut wrenching to see her cry or be hurt, she looks and sounds like Kairi, Naminé is probably getting Thanosed when DiZ is done with her because he's a dick right now, so giving Xion to her as a friend will mean nothing, the connection to Kairi, he'll feel bad.

As you can tell, Riku is great at making decisions(sarcasm)

While he's too caught up to do anything, let's check on the sea salt trio, who are getting closer as friends, i.e. seeing Hayner, Pence, and Olette do stupid stuff a KH equivalent of TikTok, which the trio repeats on their own without a phone recording them, eating ice cream, talking, and exploring the Disney worlds for fun, both old ones and new ones that will appear in future games.

In this time, Xion becomes a mix of Kairi and Naminé, outspoken, but careful with who she runs her mouth to, smart, but still open to learn, protective and still needs something if a protector, etc. She is also a wickedly fast learner.

We also get organization shenanigans like Demyx being lazy on missions, Roxas getting annoyed at Xigbar for calling him tiger, dealing with  Saïx, trying not to annoy Xaldin, even getting head pats from Xemnas, and, for fluff, Roxas and Xion finding Axel asleep on the floor of the clock tower and the two scaring him away for shits and giggles. 

Yes, a lot of time passes, about 9-11 months, give or take.

Roxas and Xion also become closer as well with Axel being something like their chaperone, only he reports to Xemnas and Saïx.

Speaking of Saïx, he meets up with Axel one day and expresses disdain with the fact Axel would rather be friends with an unstable Roxas and a literal puppet that doesn't even exist.

Axel, on edge already with Xemnas on his back, tells Saïx to put a cork in it. Saïx only pushes back, asking if Roxas even KNOWS what Xion is, even what HE is. To both their credit, the two are wonderful at playing make believe and Axel, being the child he is, is a great at being their playmate.

Axel shoves Saïx back, snapping for him to shut his mouth before he says something he'll regret. Saïx, losing his composure, shoves back, asking if he should because Axel can't handle the truth; he never has been good at it, so it's not surprising.

Ring a bell, someone, please, because Axel throws a punch into Saïx's cheekbone. Saïx returns with a left hook directly to the side of the neck and knees Axel, who grabs his leg under his knee and rolls, making them both fall and throw more punches on the ground, bruising and bloodying each other in full view of the remaining organization members. Maybe we get a gag of Xigbar and Luxord placing bets on who will win, Demyx worrying because they should probably be stopped, Xaldin scoffing at the immature display, and then Roxas and Xion walking in and instantly getting worried because Axel is not winning this fight, as evidenced by Saïx slamming his head into the floor.

When the two stand up to keep fighting, Roxas and Xion race between them, the boy in front of Saïx and a very nervous Xion in front of Axel, who tells her and Roxas to stay out of this or they'll get hurt.

Roxas obviously refuses, but Xion leads Axel away from Saïx, who asks if Axel really needs children to protect him.

No, he needs to protect these two idiots, especially Roxas, who hasn't moved and his eyes have gone Non-form-y, like he's about to transform.

Saïx returns with berserker eyes and smashes Roxas into the wall by his neck, daring him to try it.

It draws a gasp from EVRYONE, even Xaldin, but Saïx scoffs that they shouldn't try pretending to be worried, what with how unstable and how much of a nuisance Roxas is, not too mention weak, which he says while watching Roxas try to break free. He kicks at Saïx, and misses, but Saïx smirks and summons his claymore, wanting to see how tough Roxas really is.

There's a reason Xion pulled Axel away and is so nervous, because said reason puts a hand on Saïx's shoulder and asks him if he enjoys this façade of a life and would rather not disappear.

Yep. Xemnas is here, and everyone backs down, including the the bet making Xigbar and Luxord, who so they can have deniability.

Saïx snaps out of berserk mode in the blink of an eye and begrudgingly lets go of Roxas, i.e. lets him drop down.

Axel and Xion start toward him, but freeze when Xemnas eyes them, like scary eyes.

He has an announcement: There's an imposter and he could be anywhere. He's in a coat just like everyone else's, but his hood's usually up. When he's not wearing it, he's a silver haired teen. Oh, yeah, and his name is Riku.

Axel, Roxas, and Xion all gasp, Axel because Riku was in Castle Oblivion and probably knows where Sora is and Roxas and Xion because it brings back memories from Sora.

Xemnas sees the reaction, but only focuses on Roxas, asking softly if he's okay and if he was hurt.

He's fine and he wasn't and he shakes his head to chase away Non-form.

Xemnas still helps him up and orders everyone to keep their eyes open and report ANYTHING on this imposter because the sooner they catch and... well, just catch him, the better, that part being Xemnas not wanting to upset Roxas, make him go into Non-form, and have everyone need to knock him out to calm him down.

Xemnas takes Roxas away to be checked on, in case he was really hurt and doesn't know it, and Roxas asks what will happen to Saïx and Axel for fighting. He didn't see a lot of it, so he’s not even sure who started it.

They’ll be 'interviewed' and reprimanded accordingly, but they won't die, so relax.

What about the imposter? Who's Riku? And who's Sora??

Xemnas stops checking on Roxas and puts a hand on his head, which he doesn't need to worry about because the organization can deal with it. All he needs to do is keep doing missions and giving his 100%. Roxas sighs that he IS, hell he's giving 150% because Non-form's acting up, but he's kept it calm, even with the hallucinations of Sora, Ven, and now Non-form.

Xemnas finishes checking for any wounds and commends Roxas, saying that is why he chose him. Before Roxas can ask, Xemnas tells him to go in the lobby because he has a mission with Xaldin.

Roxas does so and passes by and reassuring Axel and glaring Saïx, though Roxas glares back.

Xemnas has the two sit down and that warmth he had with Roxas is GONE IN A SECOND, asking both of them what they were thinking, picking a fight in front of everyone and endangering the two most vital components to the plan. Saïx jabs that Axel is letting himself be distracted while Axel states he's doing his job and doesn't want either of them to get upset or angry to the point of dysfunctionality. Besides, He did not start that fight, which he didn't even WANT to partake in.

Does Axel have legs? For now he does, yes. Can he stand? Yes. Can he DEMONSTRATE that he can stand? This is getting tedious, but sure, and Axel stands. Now can he walk from where he is to the far wall? Again, this is tedious, but yes.

If he did ALL OF THAT, why didn't he actually do it?

With no words, Xemnas dismisses Axel, telling him to accompany Xion on their mission.

Axel nods and leaves Saïx to be scolded.

We cut to Riku as he watches Roxas and Xaldin fight of heartless and some knights in Beast's Castle, maybe even go toe to toe with Beast himself, who manages to catch Roxas off guard and momentarily confuses him with Sora.

Xaldin knocks him away and the two leave, Riku coming out and asking if that smaller nobody really was Sora.

Beast admits it was a spur of the moment, but he could have sworn it was Sora.

Meanwhile, Xion and Axel fight hard in Hollow Bastion, squaring off against Squall, Yuffie, Tifa, and Cloud, where we see both more of Axel's gymnastics and Xion's ability with a keyblade.

The fight ends when Xion stops who she believes is Riku the imposter and chases after him, Axel following her in case shit hits the fan.

Xion follows Riku to a cliffside and he gives her an offer and a warning: either give him Roxas or hope that they never meet face to face again. Xion arms herself and demands to know what that means, but Riku also arms himself right as Axel throws a chakram between them and tells Riku to fuck off before he gets hurt.

Riku gives Xion one last glance before falling off the edge and leaving through a dark corridor, making it look like he just disappeared like a badass. They’re both confused, but still call it a day, Xion asking if Axel is okay after that fight with Saïx, because he’s still a little banged up. He expresses he’s fine(he’s a big boy!!) and tells Xion not to worry. 

She’s going to anyway because Riku is after Roxas, and threatened her with a fight if she didn’t bring Roxas to him. Axel, although he’s shook, tells her everything will be fine.

LIES, because Xion is sent on a mission to defeat Riku. All she needs to do is knock him out and they’ll come collect him, no problem.

Xion IS strong, but not strong enough because Riku wipes the floor with her and is about to take her to DiZ when dusks, samurai, and Non-form Roxas, who also gets whooped, but at least fairs a little better. 

The two wear Riku out enough for a lance to graze his arm, an arrow/bullet to hit his leg, and a few cards to distract him. 

The rest of the organization arrive, even Saïx and Xemnas, the latter using thorn/vine things to bind Riku’s hands behind his back. 

He remarks that Riku’s a lot bigger than he thought he would be, stronger too, and we get one of those creepy manga Xemnas moments as he grabs Riku, pulls him close by the jaw, and states he’ll have fun seeing just how strong he is; he knows that Riku is hiding Sora, Kairi, DiZ, and his witch, and will tear him apart with his bare hands to know where they are.

With Riku thoroughly freaked out, Xemnas stands and everyone returns, all tired and ready to find Sora. 

Xion, however, isn’t. Because Riku said some very interesting things to her during their fight. 

She considers telling Roxas, but he’s too worried making sure she’s okay, because Riku was tough. She goes to Axel instead, knowing he has a key to the dungeons, and he’s instantly skeptical; she asked if he could take her to see Riku. Xion lies through her teeth and says she just wants to rub in Riku’s face that they won and he lost.

Axel agrees, but decides he’s going to follow her, just in case.

They arrive as Xigbar leaves, asking if they’re going to welcome the new arrival and need help in doing so.

Xion counters that she’s actually going to return a favor and would like to do it alone. 

Axel’s surprised and Xigbar whistles for her to stand down; he was just asking because she got kicked like a soccer ball, no harm in asking for help.

He leaves and Xion goes toward Riku’s cell, asking Axel to stay by the door until she’s done.

He does so and Xion walks towards Riku’s cell, where she and we the audience see Riku is banged up from being interrogated; looks like Xemnas is taking his time.

Riku asks what she wants and Xion responds with a deal:

Tell her about Sora and she’ll give the organization a good enough lie to let him go so he can help Sora. During their fight, the two had an argument, Xion saying she was going to protect her friend and Riku snapping she had no idea what friends were because she’s a nobody and a replica, and the reason Sora can’t wake up.

 Spark Notes of the deal: If Riku tells Xion about Sora, Xion will give the organization an answer that will buy Riku enough time to get back to Sora.

Fair, but he has one condition: If he tells her, she was to decide what she will do; he’s not refusing because she genuinely wants to know more about Sora.

Xion agrees and Riku tells her to take a seat, because they’re going to be here for a while.

[ilguna]

Berceuse - Chapter Three

summary: you can’t protect her forever.

warnings; swearing.

wc; 10.8k

NOTES; I give reader a last name to fit the world.

–

Alyssum sits alone at a table, picking at her nails while she waits for the Gamemakers to finally start calling in tributes to their private sessions. After what happened on the first day of training, she’d been given a very specific set of instructions by you and Finnick. 

And to sum it all up; she’s supposed to keep her head down and pass through training with no other problems. Do what she wants to do, play with weapons and refresh her survival skills, and keep the hell away from people unless she’s going to be nice. Alyssum hasn’t been put in timeout for years, but this feels exactly like it.

As for Paslee, he was told that if he killed Alyssum in any sort of way, directly or indirectly, and ended up winning the Hunger Games, he’d never be forgiven and he’d live to regret it. Not only would he have to live with the guilt of her death, he’d also be stuck with a bunch of victors--maybe a whole district--that loathes him.

Needless to say, the careers haven’t bothered Alyssum either, especially with Paslee there to redirect them when they come close. Which was hardly ever, Alyssum kept close to the survival stations, and even joined Katniss and Peeta when she felt like she could learn something with them, not wanting to show off.

Although, it’s no secret that she knows stuff that the others do not. 

If it comes down to just her in the arena in two days--which she has a feeling it will--there’s not a single doubt in her mind that she’ll be able to survive. If she can’t fight, it’s fine, because she doesn’t need to know how. As long as she can clean water, hunt animals, and stay out of sight, she’ll be fine.

The only people Alyssum has warmed up to are Katniss and Peeta. She’s not entirely sure that it matters in the end though, because they haven’t shown a lick of knowledge when it comes to fighting. Of course, she doesn’t have much experience herself, but at least she went to the stations to figure some stuff out.

Alyssum rests her head on her hand, right as a Gamemaker comes over the intercom, calling for Marvel, from District One. Her eyes shift over to see the tallest boy out of the career group stand, sharing a smile with her friends. She closes her eyes after that, and lets the clock on the wall tick away, counting down the minutes until it’s her turn.

After Marvel is Glimmer, then Cato, then Clove. They don’t return after they’ve been called into their session, which is good news to her. They’d probably brag if they came back inside, and she’s not really in the mood to listen to that. She’s already had to endure their constant chatter and laughter, talk about a headache.

The girl from District Three is then called, setting Paslee up to go next. When Alyssum looks over to him, curious about what he looks like right now, they lock eyes. He doesn’t stare for long, quickly shifting his eyes back to his own empty table that he’s sitting at.

As soon as Paslee is called, Alyssum begins counting down the time, eyes never leaving the clock. Five minutes, then ten. The nerves in her stomach sprout, and then make her sick when she thinks about her skills. What will she show the Gamemakers that she hasn’t already? The clock hits fifteen, and it’s only a couple seconds later, when they’re calling her name.

She slides off of the bench, standing up to her full height, which isn’t much, before starting her way to the door. She can feel her heart beating in her chest, and despite trying her best to ignore it, it’s loud. The doors open for her automatically, letting her inside, and sealing behind her to ensure she can’t go back.

The Gamemakers are all sitting together in a box, dressed in dark robes. Over these past few days during lunch, they’d go and speak to the experts from the stations, huddled together with the head trainer, too. They made it no secret that they had been discussing tributes, with occasional gestures and glances to the tables they were sitting at.

Now, it’s only her and them. It’s Alyssum’s turn to show them a secret skill, something she hadn’t wanted the other tributes to know for obvious reasons. As long as she has one deadly idea, then she might be alright.

The good news is that she has their attention. One Gamemaker motions for her to start, and she takes the initiative, turning her body towards the weapons, because she’s shown them what she can do with survival skills. The experts have told them how good she is at the stations. The only thing they don’t know is how handy she is with a knife.

She has you to thank for this skill.

This is one of the moments where Alyssum has to be grateful over the fact that you never left her defenseless. You have been drilling the idea of handling knives into her head since she turned nine.

So, when she walks up to the table, with all the differently carved knives on a pretty display, she picks up the first knife and doesn’t worry about the length, or the weight. Alyssum knows she has to find solutions in the face of discomfort. How will she combat it in one throw?

The knife she holds is too light, which is a problem she’s not used to. A part is telling her that now isn’t the time to overcome a challenge, it’ll put her score at risk. Then again, she hasn’t had the chance to play with knives for days, she should just enjoy it while she can.

Alyssum looks over the handle to see that it’s carved in the shape of a flower. Delicate, and the petals dig into her palm if she squeezes it too lightly, she’s careful not to. Her body turns towards the Gamemakers, holding the knife up in her hand by her thumb. In her time of training at the boarding school, Alyssum has only heard whispers about what actually happened during your private session, and she’s your sister.

There is one aspect that the story always revolves around, and it’s a knife. You somehow used a knife to score a ten. Alyssum wishes that could be the case for her, to show the same impressive skill you had, but it’s going to be impossible. She’s twelve, not fifteen. She has to keep her expectations realistic, and that’s why she’s aiming for an eight.

Without warning, she spins back to the targets at the knife station, arm drawn so far back that it hurts. Her eyes land on one of the bodies hanging up by a rope, fingers releasing the knife as she throws. It slices through the air quickly, no weight holding it back, and slams into the middle of the forehead.

She makes a face, looking back down at the other knives at display. There are four more copies of the knife she just threw, but she picks up one that’s on the opposite end, and finds it to be much heavier than an average knife. It clicks in her head then, that they’re laid out from least to most heaviest. If she picked out one in the middle, it’d probably work better for her.

With this one, she takes more time to get used to the weight, holding it in her palm to analyze where it’s coming from. The blade is thick, made of real metal, the blade sharp to the touch. However, it’s the handle of it that’s making it harder to hold. If she throws it, the knife is going to be more bottom heavy.

She can’t throw it by the blade this time, then. 

Alyssum rolls her wrist a couple of times, and then throws, watching as the knife slams into the skull of the dummy hard enough for it to make a ‘thump’ sound on impact. She’s pleased to see that there’s barely an inch gap between the two weapons, side by side, parallel.

It goes on like this, with her bouncing back and forth between knives, throwing them at various parts of the body. Chest, elbows, knees, shoulders. It isn’t until she realizes that she has one knife left, the one that feels just right in her palm, does she see just how much she’s gone through.

A small smile appears on her face, just before she throws this knife too, lodging it where the throat should be.

Her heart is still pounding in her ears, sucking in deep breaths through her nose while she turns to the Gamemakers, who have all suddenly stopped to watch her. She raises her chin slightly, and gives a firm nod. She’s done. She’s shown them all her one secret.

They dismiss her, and she takes a different door to leave the gymnasium. As soon as that door closes behind her, she breathes out in relief. Inside of the elevator, she takes the time to calm her marathon breathing, because there’s no need to worry anymore. She did it, she made it through another obstacle of the Hunger Games. 

Her next focus will be the interview, and then the arena, itself.

When she walks inside of the apartment, she’s able to see you sitting on the couch with Elysia, a leg tucked beneath you. The conversation looks lighthearted, nothing important. Caesar Flickerman is already on the television, talking about what the scores might look like for this year. As if the tributes ever change drastically enough to change the prediction.

“I’m back.” Alyssum announces, catching your attention. She gives a look to the hallway, wondering if Paslee is hiding in his room. 

She partially wants to ask him what the Gamemakers had done for him, if they fell silent when he showed them his special skill. Or if he’s not as special, because he’s seventeen, and he’s a career. He’s expected to have a large set of skills, therefore it’s nothing to bat their eyes at.

Either way, she doesn’t see him nearby, he must have gone straight to his room after talking to you. Alyssum’s probably going to do the same, and take a hot shower to try and relax. She has a feeling that it’s going to be nearly impossible to do, considering her whole life in the arena depends on this score.

“How was it?” you ask, turning your body to her more.

Alyssum wanders forward, “I didn’t mess up once.”

A smile appears on your face, “That’s great!”

“When do we get to see the scores?”

“After dinner,” Elysia sits up slightly, “The stylists will be joining us, too.”

Alyssum makes a face, “I’m gonna go shower and get ready, then.”

She doesn’t wait for either of them to say anything else, heading up the steps and into the hallway so that she can go to her room. She only gets a few steps in before stopping near her door, holding her breath. She can faintly hear that you and Elysia have resumed your conversation, and waits to see if she can hear anything about Paslee.

The only thing she’s able to catch is that Paslee is also confident that he scored highly. After that, the door in front of her opens, and Alyssum barely has enough time to jump to pretend she’s still going for her room. Paslee stands in the doorway, staring at her, eyes slowly lowering into a squint.

She smiles, “Just came back.” 

She leaves, makes sure that her door shuts behind her, and goes the extra mile to lock it to ensure that there won’t be any unwanted guests. If Paslee thinks that he did well during his session, then that means she should expect a score higher than eight tonight. For her, it’s unheard of for any twelve year old to get higher than a seven, but judging by the Gamemaker’s reactions, she might just barely make the cut that qualifies her as a career.

All she can do right now is cross her fingers and hope.

Alyssum picks out a nice outfit for the dinner, and then wanders into the bathroom. She peels off the training outfit, which has begun to feel like a second skin during these past couple of days. Of course, she’s given a freshly cleaned outfit everyday, but that doesn’t mean that they stink from sweat any less.

In the shower, she washes herself from head to toe, and it isn’t until she’s done, does she realize just how scorching hot the water is. And with her senses finally returning to her--after reliving her private session with the Gamemakers the entire shower--she shuts off the water and rubs at her skin carefully, not liking the sensitive feeling. 

Her body and hair is blow-dried, she pulls on her new outfit, feeling much better already. She brings a couple of hair ties with her to the window in her room, sitting on the floor to watch the city below. She can’t imagine the frenzy that the Capitol people must be in right now, desperate to get their evening activities done as soon as possible before the scores air.

She ends up with a bun on the back of her head, wanting her hair to be off the back of her neck.

She sits there for a while, watching the cars below. Her thoughts are stuck on her brothers, what they’re doing at the moment, if they’re calm, if they’re worried. This is the second time that they’re having to go through this, an occasion that doesn’t happen often. Of course, siblings volunteer all the time, like Marsh and Paslee, but the chances of them winning are slim. Very few can come out like Gloss and Cashmere, sibling victors who are very good friends of yours.

The difference here is that Alyssum didn’t volunteer, she was chosen, just like how you were chosen nine years prior. And her odds are low, lower than yours ever were. If she’s going to make it out alive, she’s going to have to be sneakier, more clever than you ever were, which is going to be impossible to do. The wolf in sheep’s clothing tributes never make it very far anymore.

Not to mention, she’s already fucked up her chances at playing that role off, anyway. Her stunt in the gymnasium gave her attitude away to everyone in that room, and the careers didn’t make it a secret that she was going to be a target. She knows that she shouldn’t beat herself up over it, especially considering that she’s done that enough already, but she screwed herself over. 

Royally.

About half an hour later, there’s a knock at her door. It’s Elysia, telling her that dinner is ready when she is. Alyssum pulls on a pair of flats before leaving her room to join everyone else at the table. Just as Elysia had promised earlier, the stylists are at the table.

Alyssum takes her spot at the table, and immediately there’s questions being asked about their private sessions. She’s a little stingy on the answers, she’s not allied with Paslee anymore, which means that whatever information she gives up about herself now, can be spun and told to the careers. For Paslee, however, he doesn’t spare details.

She has a feeling that it’s because he wants to build an image for you and Finnick, that he’s not all bad and he does have some potential. It also might have something to do with earlier, when she was basically caught eavesdropping. She waits patiently for him to finish what he’s saying, since she already found a way to crumble the flimsy sandcastle he’s been building.

“That reminds me,” Alyssum says, looking between you and Finnick, “Is it normal for the Gamemakers to be just… silent?”

You sit up, “What do you mean?”

She shrugs, “They weren’t talking or anything, during or after I was showing them my skill.”

Elysia turns her attention to Paslee, who’s beginning to lose the smile on his face, “What about you?”

“I--um,” his face twists, “A few of them were talking, but most of them were watching me.”

You and Finnick are sharing a look. Finnick tilts his head to the side, turning his attention back to the food in front of him, “Well, can’t say I’m surprised.”

“To answer your question,” you begin slowly, “No, that isn’t normal. I didn’t even have undivided attention.”

Finnick nods in agreement, “We should talk later on why that happened.”

Alyssum nods, eating her food while trying not to smile. The bragging from Paslee is done, she can tell by his sudden interest in his food, which he had been shunning earlier. 

Once everyone is done eating, they migrate to the living room, where they all take their different positions while they wait for the scores to air. Alyssum has her legs criss-crossed beneath her, rubbing her knees to bring them some warmth. 

Once Caesar is done with the formalities, he jumps right into scores, starting with District One, boys first. The boy gets a nine, the girl an eight, the boy’s score is normal, but Alyssum finds herself hung up over the girl’s score. What did she do to be so terrible? There’s hardly any time to think about it, as Cato gets a ten and Clove gets the same.

She hums.

A hand appears on her shoulder, giving it a small massage. It’s you, it’s always your go-to move when Alyssum is feeling stressed or nervous. She has to admit that this is an unforeseen twist of events. Clove is a lot better than Aly took her for, which means that it’s going to come back and bite later.

Paslee’s face appears on screen, Caesar gives a nod, and then announces that his score is a ten, too. Cheers and congratulations rain on him, as it’s a big achievement. Alyssum isn’t as worried about Paslee as she is about Clove. She already knows that he’s not allowed to directly kill her, he’ll just be messing with his relationship with you and Finnick. Which is not a gamble that most tributes want to play with their mentors.

When it’s Alyssum’s turn, the room falls into a hush, the anticipation building. Her picture comes in, and Caesar takes a moment to look over the score. A proud smile builds on his face, looking at the camera again before he says, “Alyssum Gallows, with a score of eight.”

More cheering, Alyssum can feel the balloon pop and dissipate in her chest, relief taking over. She scored high, that’s all she wanted. She’s allowed within the career playground now, she’s one of them. All there’s left to do is blow away the competition during the interviews and she’s golden for the arena.

“Amazing!” Elysia cheers, clapping quickly.

“Never done before, I don’t think.” Laurel says to Pleurisy, she’s nodding in agreement.

You pull Alyssum in for a hug, “Good job, Aly.”

“Couldn’t have done it without you and Finnick,” she murmurs back, squeezing your arm.

“What’s the plan for tomorrow?” Paslee asks.

Elysia clears her throat and stands, she’s probably going to be the first to leave, “You two will be preparing for the interviews, there’s a lot of work to do on you both. I will start with Alyssum, you’ll be with (Y/n) and Finnick for four hours, and then we’ll switch. You’ll get more details about what you’re doing tomorrow, I wouldn’t want to ruin the surprise.”

Paslee stands, and stretches his arms above his head with a yawn.

“We’ll get you up tomorrow if you’re not already.” Finnick says.

“Thank you,” he starts out of the living room, “For the training all these years, it looks like it paid off.”

“Just keep up with that spirit and we’ll be even,” you tell him, “Goodnight.”

“‘Night.”

Just as he takes off to his room, Caesar’s finishing up with District Twelve. Their tributes normally always score low, so no one normally pays attention, yet the television hasn’t been shut off just yet. Alyssum watches as Peeta receives an eight, making Paslee stop moving, halfway into the hallway already.

The room’s buzz dies out into silence once again, which means that no one misses when Katniss gets an eleven.

Alyssum stares for a moment, and then looks over to Paslee, who seems to be just as awestruck as she is. She may only be twelve, but never in her life has she seen a Twelve tribute score any higher than a five, which is their average score in the first place. Aly can’t help it when she looks at you and Finnick, waiting for some sort of a reaction.

It comes from Laurel first, “That stylist of hers has really set the stage for them.” she’s scowling, “We should get going so we can fix the interview outfits again.”

Pleurisy gets to her feet, “And we were nearly done this time, too. We’ll see you later.”

They leave, the door shutting behind them with a click. No one wants to move from where they’re standing or sitting. It’s a few more beats before you clear your throat, getting to your feet, “Well, she sure knows how to pick ‘em.”

“We should go have that talk on the balcony,” Finnick says.

“Do you think that it was a mistake?” Paslee asks hopefully.

“The Gamemakers never make a mistake that severe,” Elysia snuffs, heading to leave.

You nod, “She’s right, Katniss must have done something fantastic in order to get a score that good. My only advice to you now is not to go after Katniss purposely.”

He nods, turning away and going up the steps. He disappears into the hallway, Elysia is nowhere to be seen. The only people left are the Gallows family, gathered together in a triangle, sharing a look of doubt between them. You let out a sigh, placing your hand on Aly’s lower back as you guide her to the balcony, where the wind will be too loud to try and eavesdrop through.

“What exactly happened?” you ask her, and Alyssum doesn’t waste time reciting her time with the Gamemakers. From beginning to end, every single detail is given up, and it’s clear that she’s been dying to share, because she forgets to take breaths of air between sentences.

By the time she’s done speaking, she’s waiting anxiously for your guys’ assessment of what happened, and what it means. It obviously has to be good in some aspect, considering that she just pulled an eight. The other twelve year-old girl had only gotten a seven, which is pretty good, considering her odds, but it’s not career worthy.

“I feel like they were holding back on her score,” Finnick murmurs, leaning up against the railing, staring out at the city lights, “If she didn’t miss a single target with perfect accuracy, she should’ve gotten a higher score.”

“Yeah, but if they scored her higher, then that means she would have a bigger target on her back.”

“Publicity, though.”

“And they’d have to admit that not only is District Four training their tributes, so are One and Two. They’d have to do something about it.”

“She’s your sister, though. We know the way they score tributes and why they do it, she should have gotten a nine.” Finnick looks at you.

“You got a nine,” you remind Finnick, “And with what you showed them, they would have to reevaluate their whole scoring system just to allow her to be a nine.”

“That’s my point, they’ve changed so much, this shouldn’t have been a big deal.”

A sigh escapes you, “I’m grateful for the fact that she even got an eight in the first place. Like I said earlier, she would’ve had a bigger target on her back, and we already agreed that she should be watching her moves so the careers aren’t going after her specifically.”

Finnick makes a face, not liking this conclusion, but turns his attention back to Aly anyway, “You did good, kid. As for Katniss and Peeta, I would be careful trying to be their ally. You know that the careers will want them now.”

“Take advantage of that,” you cup her face, making her look at you, “Their eyes won’t be on you, which is a perfect distraction.” 

You place a kiss on her forehead, “I’ll try.”

“Good.” you say, “Go to bed, Elysia will be working you from start to end. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, love you.”

“I love you too, Aly.”

--

When Elysia wakes Alyssum the following morning, she waits by the door until Alyssum sits up, after that she takes off. Aly takes her time going through the closet, since there’s no set outfit that Laurel had planned. She throws on some jeans and a shirt, then moves onto the bathroom to do the rest of her morning routine.

By the time she’s done and moving onto the dining room, everyone is already at the table eating. She takes her seat, and listens as you, Finnick and Elysia go back and forth on meaningless things. Mostly about the scores and what the other tributes had gotten. It seems as if you and Finnick went back to rewatch the scores, just in case any other big scores were missed. 

And they had, the boy from District Eleven had scored a ten, not a big surprise. Both Paslee and Alyssum offer up what little information they observed inside of the Training Center. Just that he’s intimidating and is clearly hiding some serious skills, as he didn’t do much when it came to training.

When food comes at a slow pace, it’s time to get the four hours started. Alyssum drinks the rest of her hot chocolate, wipes her mouth, and follows Elysia back to her room. 

It’s clear that Elysia has been doing this for years, because there’s not a single second of hesitation in her movements. She pulls out a long dress and heels for Alyssum to put on while she rearranges the chairs to fit her needs. Before Alyssum is allowed to sit, she’s required to walk around the room to allow Elysia to assess her.

She’s wobbly, it’s not a secret. There are several times where Elysia jerks to catch Aly when she begins to fall. Elysia mentions something about the carpet isn’t helping, but that doesn’t mean they get to change environments. They spend a good thirty minutes on just this, and by the end of it, Aly’s not half bad.

The next three and a half hours are tiring. Elysia fixes posture, corrects the way she sits several times, and has a whole segment on tweaking manners. A smile at the end of every sentence, or at the beginning, how to do a polite pause--Aly can’t believe that’s even a thing--and so on. She’s sure that Elysia is making it all up, until she gives a perfect example of all of her teachings thrown together in just a sentence.

Alyssum is dumbfounded.

“Well?” Elysia asks after a long moment of silence.

Alyssum’s face is twisted, “I feel like I could skip over all of this and the Capitol wouldn’t care.”

Elysia lets out a laugh, covering her mouth, “You’re lucky my four hours is over. It’s time for lunch.”

Alyssum changes back into her original outfit, helps Elysia put the room back together, and finds that Paslee is still working with you two. It isn’t until Alyssum has sat at the table, and is begun to be served lunch, do you realize that time is up.

Lunch is quick, Alyssum offers Paslee good luck in passing. She can’t imagine what he’ll be doing for four hours with Elysia if that’s what she just went through. He’s confused, she smiles, and joins you and Finnick in the sitting room while Elysia directs him to his room.

Alyssum doesn’t even get to sit down before Finnick is turning to you, “Okay, let me speak and then you can object.”

You raise your eyebrows, “So it’s not going to be something that I like?”

“Hear me out first.” Finnick says, and then looks at Alyssum, “If we tried to do some delicate personality on her, then she'd be looked over, which is what I originally suggested. However, laying low was ruined her first day of training, so we can’t just keep working with it.”

You stare at Finnick, “You’re suggesting we try and make her aggressive? Do you see her?”

“The Capitol doesn’t know what happened that first day of training, but the other tributes did. And now that everyone has seen her score, any facade that we were trying to give off, is ruined. There’s no point in trying to fool the other tributes.” Finnick explains, “That was the whole point of her being careful, right?”

“Yes, but I’m not entirely sure how the Capitol is going to react to her being anything other than innocent.”

He smiles, “Won’t know until we try.”

“This is not a game.”

“It isn’t, and still we took a chance exactly like this when we sent Marsh into the interviews with a comedy skit.” 

It’s weird for Alyssum to see you and Finnick like this outside of the boarding school. You two have your moments like these all the time, banter back and forth until a solution is worked out. It’s how the two of you work through problems, minor or not. No matter what happens, though, you two never do it at home. And if you do, it’s never been in front of Alyssum.

Either way, Alyssum thinks that he’s won you over.

“Okay, say we do go through with this,” you start, Finnick sits up taller, “What’s her play? She’s not intimidating, she’s too small for that. She doesn’t look aggressive, and proved that during the tribute parade, and she’s my sister.”

“Exactly, she’s your sister. They all know what happened during our games, how we won, how we got there. It doesn’t matter what she looks like or what she did, she just has to try right now. It’s all about playing pretend.”

There’s a pause of silence as you look her over, gears turning in your head, “Okay, what do you suggest?”

“Aloof.”

Their eyes turn back to Alyssum, she raises her eyebrows, trying not to smile.

“We can make that work.”

They start getting to work on her after that, giving examples on how she can be aloof. Once again, she finds out that she’s really not bad at it, if she relaxes enough, it can come naturally. When they’re sure she has the personality down, they begin the questions that force her to open up or shut them out in order to keep it intact.

She’s good at it, picking which questions get to pass long enough to tell the Capitol a little about herself. They already know about her family, even if all the information is outdated now. She needs to tell them about her, how she went from that toddler in the family interview to a girl earning an eight on her training score.

After talking about herself, she’s then asked to say some stuff about the Capitol. It doesn’t come as naturally, since you and Finnick haven’t made your hatred for the Capitol a secret by any means. It’s rubbed off on her over the years, and recently it’s only begun to get worse. She’s stuck trying to find little things that will satisfy the Capitol’s curiosity on her experience thus far.

When she’s told to stop, she’s relieved but worried. You lean back on the chair you sit in, stretching your arms above your head, “She’s too much like me, I clammed up when it came to the Capitol, too.”

“Then don’t talk about the Capitol,” Finnick suggests, “Change the topic to something else, like home.”

“That would work better.” You say, readjusting.

And so it starts again, this time much smoother. You’re satisfied with her answers, shift gears, and tell her that in the last hour that you three have together, she’s going to pretend as if she’s actually being interviewed. You’ll be the one asking questions, Finnick will be the audience and judge by how they would react, and Alyssum has to throw all of her knowledge together. This includes what Elysia had taught her.

She doesn’t know how you know so many questions, or why they come so effortlessly, but there’s hardly a break between questions. Finnick will gasp, clap, sit in silence, and shake his head depending on answers. If it’s appropriate, she’ll elaborate on answers, which Finnick will nod encouragingly to tell her that it’s good and she should keep going. 

The second that their four hours is up, Alyssum is on her feet, ready to be done with the mock interview. Her jaw hurts from talking so much, and she’s got a headache going on. At least you and Finnick seem to be satisfied with her results, because it’s nothing but smiles on your guys’ part.

Elysia comes out a minute later, dusting her hands and placing them on her hips, “They’re ready for tomorrow.”

“Yes, they are.” You agree.

Dinner is quiet and uneventful, both tributes had been given more than enough time to learn everything needed. They eat their dinner, and stick by long enough for you to tell them that they don’t have matching outfits for the interviews anymore. The two of them had completely forgotten to update Laurel and Pleurisy about it.

“Thank us later,” Finnick smiles.

“It still has the same idea to it, doesn’t it?” Alyssum asks.

“For you, yes. Paslee has something different.” You say.

Paslee shrugs, not bothered, “I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”

“The stylists aren’t starting at noon tomorrow, so I wouldn’t stay up late if I were you.”

He doesn’t say anything back. Alyssum begins to push her plates and bowls away from her, getting ready to leave. She can imagine that it’s going to be a busy morning tomorrow, and knowing her nerves, she’s not going to be able to fall asleep easily. 

“I’m going to go, too.” she says, smiling, “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Aly. Love you.”

“Love you too,” she chirps, heading into her room.

She stands before her bed for a few seconds, not feeling tired. A part of her just wants to sit in the shower and let the warmth rain on her, but she knows that the prep team will undoubtedly have her do that tomorrow, anyways. 

Alyssum lays in bed for a while, staring at the ceiling, occasionally out the window. She misses her bed, back home it wouldn’t matter if she’s exhausted or not, she could always fall asleep in her bed. Not to mention all the soft blankets that she’s collected over the years. The only way she’ll ever feel comfort like that again, is if she somehow manages to pull off a win.

She’s got a footing, she can’t deny it. Laurel is her stylist, you’re her older sister, Finnick’s her brother-in-law. She’s been training for five years now, Paslee too. There’s spotlight on her, she’s managed to score an eight, and made semi-friends with Katniss and Peeta.

All she has to do is not screw this up, which is easier said than done.

She’s twelve years-old, no one has ever won at twelve, Finnick is the youngest victor for a reason. She made enemies with another career, who’s fifteen and bigger than her, and scored a ten. Clove is going to have some influence over the career pack, which means that if she wants to hunt down Alyssum, she’s not going to get any opposition.

And Alyssum doesn’t have any real allies, she has to keep that in mind too. Katniss and Peeta were a nice thought, but she didn’t secure any sort of deal with them. She’s on her own inside of the arena, and that can be the safest bet sometimes. Only, when situations get sticky, it’s good to have that extra pair of hands.

She’s screwed inside of that arena, and that’s all she can think about.

The prep team scares Alyssum awake when they appear in the morning. Cleo’s pulling her into a sitting position, she can hear the shower running in the bathroom, and Leo is pulling chairs around to rearrange the room. She and Elysia had worked so hard to get everything looking back to normal too…

“Rise and shine!” Cleo laughs, “You sleep like the dead.”

No, that’s not right. Alyssum doesn’t even remember falling asleep, much less getting drowsy. It must have been some time after three did she fall asleep, because that’s the last time she checked the clock before rolling over to stare out the window again.

“What time is it?” Aly asks, rubbing her eyes.

“Ten thirty, which is why we’ve got to start.”

She follows their directions, dragging her feet the entire way. They start with a shower to jumpstart her, pressing buttons that she hadn’t considered using before. They wash her hair, and make her use a special body wash so she smells sugary. When she’s done, her hair is like silk and almost doesn’t feel real.

They dress her in undergarments, and that’s as far as they go with clothing. Beth takes her time on Alyssum’s hair, humming a song to herself. Cleo and Leo go back and forth between talking and arguing about certain things. No matter what happens, Beth doesn’t get in the middle of it.

All of her nails are painted white with hollow pink circles placed in specific areas. Once Cleo moves out of the way, Leo gets to work with makeup. It’s the last time she’s able to see what Beth is doing to her hair, which has so far consisted of straightening it. Beth must’ve been waiting for this part, because it’s when she really starts getting to work.

Laurel must want the reveal to be a surprise, then. Alyssum gets comfortable with her eyes closed, tuning in and out when she feels like pitching in her own opinions. Mostly she’s letting her imagination take her on a ride on what the arena might look like. The possibilities are endless, of course. If it doesn’t have anything to do with water, she hopes it won’t be a desert, at the very least.

Alyssum can’t stand hot climates, she’d rather freeze at night than spend an entire day sweating, going back and forth getting water. Dehydration is a nightmare, and she won’t want to live through it long enough to be declared a victor.

Beth then says she’s done, spraying hairspray on Alyssum’s hair, it smells just as good as her body wash did. They have to wait until Leo is done before they have her get up and turn her back to the mirror and window. Cleo shakes a can, Aly holds her arms out so that Cleo can get to every single area.

The initial spray is cold, but the longer she circles Alyssum, the more she gets used to the feeling. Whatever it is, it’s glittery, just not to the point that it’s overwhelming. When Alyssum manages to sneak a wipe on the wall, curious if it’ll transfer, it stays stuck to her skin.

“Don’t worry,” Leo says, as if he’s reading her mind, “It’ll come off when you shower tonight.”

That’s good news, she won’t be an obvious target each time she steps into the sun.

She continues to stand in the corner, waiting for Laurel to finally come by. Cleo twists hair around her finger, listening to Beth talk about what she plans to do with her hair. All it takes is for Leo to ask her to do his hair too, and she lightens up and asks what he wants done. This is the most Alyssum’s heard Beth talk since she got here.

As soon as the door opens, conversation dies out. Alyssum is instructed to close her eyes again while Laurel looks her over. Once it’s approved, the dress is brought in, and Alyssum has to navigate it with her eyes closed. Cleo is there to hold her hand and steady Aly when she needs it, but for the most part she’s useless. After the dress, comes the heels.

She expects she’ll be allowed to open her eyes after this part, but they insist on putting the finishing touches on her first. Dangly earrings, she can tell by the feeling. A few rings on her fingers, a necklace, one bracelet, and even go as far to give her an ankle bracelet too. Then Beth remembers the headband that she was supposed to put on Alyssum,

“She’s beautiful.” Cleo sighs, “Can we show her now?”

“Yes,” Laurel says, she sounds happy too.

Alyssum is shuffled in front of the mirror, and with a countdown from her prep team, she’s allowed to open her eyes. She doesn’t recognize who stands in front of her. Alyssum has dressed up at home before, the day of the reaping being a good example of that, however she’s never gone this far before.

Her hair is down and curled at the ends, and the white fabric headband in the middle. She can’t pinpoint what color her eyeshadow is, each time she moves her head to get a better angle to look at herself, it changes into a different pastel color. She knows she has rainbow highlights on her cheeks, at the very least. She also has winged eyeliner and fake eyelashes to bring more attention to her face.

Her earrings are rose gold and have little flowers spread throughout the chain. As for her dress, the upper half is like a tank top with how thick the straps are, it's a very smooth material. And the bottom half of it resembles layered petals, almost like a rose, that ends at her knees. It’s stiff enough to keep the bell look, but moves when touched. It has that lenticular look that her eyeshadow does, only with more glitter--that also doesn’t transfer.

The bracelet is a simple gold chain with dainty flower charms on it, her rings are also gold. Some have flowers, others have little designs that keep with the theme that Laurel has given her. Her ankle bracelet matches the one on her wrist, and her shoes are see-through with straps around her ankles.

No matter how she moves, she catches the light and changes colors. The colors match, too. Alyssum’s not sure how they managed to pull that one off, but they did it perfectly. If her eyeshadow goes green, so does her dress. However, it seems as if the colors mostly keep in the range of red, pink or orange. 

“This is amazing,” Alyssum moves to a different angle, and catches the light pink that they must have been modeling the outfit after.

“It was your idea.” Laurel smiles.

“You managed to pull it off, though, I can’t take the credit for this,” Alyssum looks at her stylist, “Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome,” she looks at her watch, “I think it’s time for us to get to the elevator, so look her over.”

The prep team circles Alyssum for a full minute, checking and double-checking areas to make sure they aren’t missing anything. Once they’re sure they haven’t missed anything, they escort Alyssum out of her room and straight to the elevator. Elysia is standing by it, talking to you and Finnick. You two have also dressed up for the occasion.

“It’s a shame I’m not your stylist anymore, because you two look like shit.” Laurel says, causing you and Finnick to turn around.

“Excuse me?” your voice is sharp, “We made your career, the least you could have is some respect!”

Finnick places his hands on his hips, “What she said.”

You can’t hold the serious face you were trying to keep, a snort comes from Finnick as you dissolve into laughter. Once the two of you are collected enough, your attention turns to Alyssum, “Look at you! Reed and Mox are going to love this.”

Alyssum smiles, doing a small curtsy, “Will Caesar be able to compare us?”

“No, not at all,” Laurel says, “We designed you specifically like this to avoid any comparisons, you need to be yourself for just one night.”

“I was in blue and silver, you’re in the clear, trust me.” you smile.

“And pink is definitely your color.” Finnick says, you elbow his ribs.

“I can’t believe you guys got done before Pleurisy.” Elysia says, “That’s a miracle.”

Finnick clears his throat, “You didn’t hear it from me, but apparently Paslee was acting like a diva.”

Elysia coughs, trying to hide her laugh. Alyssum presses her lips together, looking at the elevator. You and Finnick share two different looks, trying to get the other to lose it. Laurel shakes her head for a long while… until Cleo snorts and the hallway erupts into laughter.

Which is right on time for the door to open and Pleurisy to walk out, rolling her eyes, “Sorry we’re late.”

Paslee is the last out of the apartment, dressed in a gentle pink suit that has a white undershirt. He gives a smile to Alyssum, raising his eyebrows as if he’s impressed. With what she just heard, though, she can’t help but laugh.

“Let’s go,” Elysia says, pressing the button to the elevator.

They all crowd inside, being careful to conceal the two tributes in the middle of bodies, not wanting them to be the first people seen when the doors open. Elysia, Laurel and Pleurisy lead them out just far enough for you and Finnick to say what you want to before the interviews.

“Okay,” you breathe, “I hope you two already realize that you’re mildly matching.”

“Yes,” Paslee says, Alyssum nods.

“No back-handed compliments to the Capitol,” Finnick starts, “they don’t like it, and neither would you two. Compliment them on something at least once during the interview if you can fit it in, don’t force it.”

“Tell the truth as much as you can, if you have to lie to keep things interesting, we’ll lie with you. The sky is your limit, just keep the boarding school out of it at all costs, we can’t let it get shut down.” You continue, “Keep in character, don’t go out of it. They know it’s a facade already, but they love pretending it’s real.”

“If you don’t like a question, let Caesar down gently. Be short, yet give enough information to make sure it satisfies and move onto another topic. He’ll never go back and bring it up again. He’ll likely split it up into three categories.” Finnick holds out his fingers, “The Capitol, family, and you. He’s going to stress on the last two because you’re siblings of tributes that have gone in before. You’re like an update, and the Capitol will eat it up.”

You smile, “If either of you get nervous, we’re in the crowd, and so are your stylists and prep teams. Find us if you need reassurance, but you have to look around, especially to the balconies. Don’t forget the people up there.”

It’s silent for a beat or two, and then Finnick’s lips are also turning upwards into a smile, “It’s only three minutes.”

Alyssum and Paslee are told to stand behind the District Three tributes, with Aly in front of him. Unlike the private training session, for the interviews, it’s ladies first. Which is good, because Alyssum doesn’t want to be shadowed by Paslee.

With tributes arriving slowly, she’s able to take in how the interviews are going to work. As soon as everyone is in line in the correct order, they’ll be brought outside to the stage, where Capitol citizens will be waiting in a large crowd, the most expensive of them will be on private balconies.

All tributes will be on stage for the interviews, just sitting on chairs behind Caesar while he goes through them one by one. Alyssum will have to be careful on how she reacts to tributes and what they’re saying, and be even more careful with her posture. 

The last pair of tributes arrive, and one-by-one they all get onto stage, heading toward their seats in the back. Alyssum is only on the bottom step, not even in sight of the Capitol just yet, and she can feel a sickness sprout in her throat, a headache beginning at the sight of all the bright lights.

Tonight is going to be miserable.

She steps on stage, and offers the crowd a shy smile. In a small glimpse she’s able to see that they’re all standing, none of them are sitting. All streets leading up to the City Circle are packed with brightly colored people dressed in various styles. She notes that not all balconies are occupied by the expensive Capitol people, but Gamemakers and cameras instead. It doesn’t ease her nerves at all.

She takes her seat in the white chair, making sure to cross her legs and sitting as straight as possible. Paslee, who’s sitting to her left, readjusts to do the same. The two of them whisper quietly about how everyone back home is watching. District Four is waiting eagerly to see what you and Finnick have cooked up this year. She hopes they’re satisfied.

Caesar bounces on stage as soon as his cue is given, the crowd roars, clapping and cheering for him. This year, his hair is a light blue, and so is the gloss on his lips. He wears a matching midnight blue suit that twinkles like stars with how many light bulbs are attached to it.

He makes sure that the audience is in a light mood by cracking a few jokes, and quickly introduces Glimmer before they have a chance to retreat. Alyssum stares blankly, watching as each career comes and goes, how they’re acting in front of the Capitol, how Alyssum can replicate it when it finally comes to be her turn.

It’s all very light on her end, figuring that she’ll be able to be gentle with the aloof idea. Then Clove finishes her interview, and gives Alyssum a certain look on the way back to her chair, and suddenly the competition has started. She can’t help the smirk that curls onto her face.

As soon as the District Three boy sits, Alyssum prepares to stand.

“May I introduce District Four’s very own Alyssum Gallows?” Caesar asks slyly, motioning back with his hand. The Capitol’s cheers are loud, almost deafening.

Alyssum gets to her feet, forcing the smile to hide. She has to look indifferent, or else the aloof idea won’t work. She stands tall, and walks carefully to the center stage. Reed and Mox are back home, on the edge of their seats, she can just feel it. You have told your story to the boarding school a thousand times, you were sweet during your interviews.

Now it’s Alyssum’s turn to be the opposite.

As soon as she stops in front of Caesar, grabbing his hand for the handshake, the three minutes have begun. It’s her time to be memorable, and she needs to fight to be seen as one of the careers, even if she won’t be joining them. She’s got the personality for it.

“Alyssum!” Caesar gasps, as if she’s an old friend, “You’re all grown up!”

She raises her eyebrows, looking out to the crowd, “Of course I am, it’s been nine years since you saw me last.”

“Nine years?” He asks incredulously, face twisted in mock horror, “The years aren’t showing, are they folks?”

The crowd shouts back at him, some clapping, others cheering. He lets out a laugh after a moment, waving off the idea that he could ever get old. That’s exactly why they have plastic surgery here. Alyssum almost didn’t believe it when you told her that Caesar has been hosting the Hunger Games for more than forty years.

“That dress is very eye-catching.” Caesar says, “I can’t even pinpoint what color it is!” He laughs.

“That’s because it’s not just one color,” she says as if it’s obvious, “Laurel, my stylist, went with a lenticular design.”

To prove what she said, she moves from side to side, allowing the crowd to see what Caesar means. With all the artificial lighting now that the sun’s down, it gives them the perfect opportunity to see. The crowd cheers, there’s a few stray whistles.

“Oh, that’s fantastic!” Caesar awes, “And the bottom half, is it supposed to resemble a flower?”

“Yes, everything on me is flowery.” she hesitates, and then begins slowly, “Actually, it’s supposed to represent the innocence that the Capitol is taking away from me by forcing me to go inside of an arena as a punishment for a problem I didn’t even cause.”

And before the tension can settle, she flashes a smile and forces out a laugh, which Caesar reluctantly joins. Her eyes find you and Finnick in the crowd, you make a pinching motion with your fingers, probably telling her to tone it down. The problem is that she doesn’t want to.

“Well, for such an innocent girl, you scored so high.” He says, trying to move on.

“It runs in the family.”

“I can tell! Does it have anything to do with a special skill?” He asks, a hush seems to fall over the audience, eager to hear this part.

As if she’ll ever give it away, “You’ll just have to wait and see.”

“Oh! I was afraid you’d say that!” He laughs, and looks at the crowd, “I know for sure that people have been on the edge of their seats wanting to know.”

“My only hint is that it relates to my sister in an aspect,” her eyes cast upwards, towards one of the balconies, “Doesn’t it?”

There’s a couple of quick nods coming from the Gamemakers, they know what she’s talking about, “Yes!” one of them shouts.

“A resemblance! As if we don’t have enough of those already!” and then he slows for a moment, “Speaking of which, I have to ask, at the reaping, was the gold dress intentional?”

Alyssum shakes her head, “No, just an unfortunate coincidence.”

There’s a few shouts of agreement, “Yes, I do think so too. I hope it ends up bringing luck in the end. What do you think your brothers thought of it?”

“They probably hated it, watching the youngest get reaped, especially since they’re absolutely helpless in the process. I’m sure that they won’t be wearing gold for generations to come.”

“I think that would be a wise choice,” Caesar agrees, “When you said goodbye, how was it?”

“Hard. They gave me an old necklace that belonged to mom and then made me promise something.” Alyssum can feel her time coming to an end, thankfully, she doesn’t think she can pretend any longer.

“And what did they make you promise?” Caesar asks, a hush falls in the air again.

It’s a lie, but they’ll never know, none of them will ever know. She looks out to the crowd, finding you and Finnick, “To win at all costs.”

The buzzer sounds, Alyssum can feel the relief hit her instantly. The crowd is cheering loudly, clapping, whistling, stomping. She can hardly hear herself think, eyes darting to the nearest camera. She hopes that this performance was good enough for everyone back home. Even if the promise wasn’t actually made, she’s going to bring it to life as best as possible.

“Ladies and gentlemen, Alyssum Gallows from District Four! It was a pleasure talking to you again, Alyssum. I wish you luck on your promise.” Caesar grins.

There has to be some sort of hatred that he’s hiding, because she nearly single handedly ruined the show. There were a hundred things she could have said after he commented on her dress, she just held it in. Not to mention, it definitely would’ve lost the favor of the Capitol.

Alyssum raises a hand to the crowd as a goodbye, and then makes her way back to her chair, ignoring the glares she’s getting from the rest of the careers. Paslee utters out a congratulations, she wishes him luck. He’s going to need it, at this rate she stole the entire show and she was only up there for three minutes. Even though it felt like an entire lifetime. 

Paslee is called up, and Alyssum spends the entire interview trying to figure out what his angle is. If she was aloof--although, she did get hostile at some moments--then what did he have to go with? It comes to her when he keeps making statements that end the same way, he’s being cocky.

She can’t blame you and Finnick for making him act like this, it’s a good word to go off of, especially since he’s been training inside of the boarding school for years now. He’s got all of the experience on lock, and so far she hasn’t seen him doubt himself once.

Caesar’s only a little surprised that he’s getting an attitude like this right after Alyssum, maybe he was hoping only one of them would be bad to deal with. It sucks to be him, she supposes, because the two of them are careers, whether they want to admit it or not. Age doesn’t matter.

She’s expected to be timid, he’s supposed to be loud. It’s nice being able to see their surprise up-close.

His interview ends with a flourish, she’s honestly bored watching every other tribute go after her. It hits a point where they all act the same, since they all scored in the low range and their mentors haven’t seen a victor for years. They’ve lost all originality and rely on old tricks to get them through.

It could be worse, though. They could be from District Twelve, which Alyssum perks back up at, hoping for something good. Katniss gets through her interview, and Aly isn’t surprised when she says she promised her younger sister that she’d win. Her buzzer goes off, it’s Peeta’s turn.

It isn’t until the very end of his interview, does he take the spotlight right from Alyssum, and place it back on them again. She was sure with her attitude that it would be unbeatable, but there’s nothing better than a live love confession in the Capitol. Even she can hear Paslee curse under his breath, rolling his eyes.

Peeta’s in love with Katniss.

She’s glad when the interviews end and she’s able to stand on her feet again. The anthem plays, she raises her head as required, impatient to get off the stage. Once it’s finally over, everyone files into a line, starting with District One, and walks off stage and to the lobby.

Alyssum lets out the biggest sigh as soon as she’s out of sight, curling her hands into fists as she and Paslee go to search for you and Finnick in the sea of bodies. There’s a possibility that it wasn’t intentional, after all, Caesar had led up to that question. Doesn’t mean that he’s to blame for it, though.

“What a waste.” Paslee murmurs, walking beside Alyssum.

“Tell me about it.”

With every passing second, the lobby becomes an even worse nightmare. The two of them end up agreeing on just taking an elevator up to their floor, instead of waiting for their people. Just before Alyssum steps into the elevator with Paslee, she realizes who’s standing inside of it.

It consists of the entire band of careers, she backs off and moves onto the elevator next to it, and finds that it’s not much better. Peeta stands in this one, and it’s packed full with a bunch of other tributes. She sucks it up, presses the Four button, and then picks a wall to stand by until it’s her turn to get off.

Thankfully, it only stops once before hers, letting off the girl from Three. When the doors open again, she slips around people to get out. Paslee is waiting for her in the hallway, together they go inside of the apartment. They’re the first to arrive, which isn’t a big surprise. There’s a lot of people that need to be transferred.

“Quite an interview you had,” Paslee says, probably not wanting to wait in silence.

“I can say the same for you.”

“I’m not sure passive-aggressive was the way to go.”

She looks at him, “Who cares? They’ve probably forgotten about me already.”

The door opens, and one by one, does everyone file in. Instantly, congratulations are falling on the two of them. Briefly, you and Finnick pull her aside to talk about why she went off track, and explain to her that she wasn’t supposed to verbalize the anger, just show it through body language. She’s lucky that she changed her attitude by the end, because that saved her.

Kind of.

With the exception of the prep team, everyone sits at the table for dinner, which is a little more elegant than it was these past couple of nights. The Capitol’s food is always delicious, but tonight is a special occasion. It’s their last night in the Capitol, as tomorrow morning they’ll both be at the arena before ten.

Laurel and Pleurisy keep conversation going by giving out their opinions and who would’ve interested them personally if they weren’t stylists. They end up admitting that Katniss and Peeta have, once again, outshone them all, which is something that Alyssum already figured out. 

She should probably invest a couple of days into looking for either Katniss or Peeta inside of the arena. Even if the two of them aren’t allies, having one of them as her backup is going to be better than no one. Besides, she can’t even entertain the idea of joining the careers.

Of course, that means she’s going to have to get over her growing irritation for the both of them. 

They bring Alyssum and Paslee into the living room so that they can watch a recap of the interviews. She has to admit that it’s very different seeing them from the front than the back or on the television screens provided. Whenever a tribute looks at a certain camera, it’ll flip to that perspective.

She can hardly stomach watching Peeta confess his love again, but she’s happy to see that she’s not the only tribute that reacted negatively--with the exception of Katniss, who was bright red. It makes her realize that there’s a problem with wanting to team up with either of them, Katniss especially.

With all of the attention they’ve been getting lately, the careers are probably seeing them as a threat. If she goes out of her way to find them and it turns out that the careers are hunting them, she’ll be screwed. And the careers will have a field day because they’ll have two tributes they want to kill, right next to each other.

Maybe she needs to do some rethinking.

Elysia is the first to say her goodbyes, hugging Paslee first, but holds onto Alyssum the longest. When she pulls away, there’s tears in her eyes. She wishes the two of them luck, since they won’t be seeing her again after tonight, and then leaves immediately to have a breather.

You and Finnick give them a smile. She can’t imagine what you’re thinking right now, how you might want to react. Alyssum begins to wish that she had spent more time with you in between events, even if that meant she’d be exhausted everyday. It would’ve been better than the guilt that’s settling in her chest.

“Aly, stay out of the cornucopia.” You start, “I don’t care what the reason behind going might be, run in the other direction.”

Alyssum nods.

Finnick looks over at Paslee, “Watch your back, there’s going to be a dozen people in the bloodbath at that moment. You don’t know who’s watching you or what their plans are. Also, don’t go too deep inside, you’ll trap yourself. Wait until you’re absolutely sure that it’s over.”

“Finding water should be both of your guys’ priority. And use common sense inside of the arena, please.” you give them a gentle smile, “No matter what happens, we have your back, remember that.”

“Thank you,” Paslee says.

“Go rest, you’ll be getting up early tomorrow morning.” Finnick says.

Paslee nods, heading up the steps. Alyssum doesn’t move from where she stands, staring up at you and Finnick. The longer the silence settles, the more tears fill her own eyes. She’ll be on her own starting tomorrow morning, and she doesn’t even know what to do. Did she even make progress?

“Come here,” you open your arms for her.

She doesn’t hesitate, crying into your dress.

Alyssum doesn’t want to go.

--

BERCEUSE IS A SPIN-OFF //MASTERLIST//

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[techie-waterwitch]

Since I seem to see Kyanite be put on the spotlight. I thought I’d post some of my headcanons I have for my muses relationships with this particular original gem. In a list of headcanons I’d like to call

Relationships towards Kyanite

Now going right off the bat. Let’s start with Lapis. There’s a lot to be said about Lapis’s dedication towards her fusion friend. She came into her life pretty late in life, and while not the most ideal person to get close to. Lapis did grow a rather soft spot for her. This was probably because of the transition Kyanite had sticking around her family. Suddenly she preferred Lapis over Peridot because of her changing and becoming one person. Lapis became some what a role model without even realizing it at first look.

 In Kyanite’s early development she used to badger Lapis for sweets or cry out for her attention to gain nothing really except sweets and affection out of boredom.

Lapis learned some life skills a greater sense of responsibility not only because of her friendships she had made, but because she had someone who needed her.

She doesn’t always agree with all that goes down with Kyanite, but that’s not going to stop her from doing things that can be morally questionable with her. They both have a love for mischief and being snarky people.  

They argue a lot over who is prettiest but this is a façade genuinely Lapis doesn’t really care. She knows she is beautiful and she enjoys the notion of becoming an inspiring factor for some of Kyanite’s features.

Lapis is a typical person when it comes to letting Kyanite venture off on her own because of her attachment towards her she’s super protective and doesn’t want her going out after dark. It’s that sometimes she forgets Kyanite has two full grown gems composed of her. She’s used to the whinny overly clingy gem she once was

Whenever these two genuinely fight it can get pretty intense, but Lapis is normally the first to come out and admit she is wrong to fight unless Kyanite has seriously wronged her. But to this day that has not happened.

Lapis was once very aloof around her being a fusion of aquamarine that is until she got to know the real person in the fusion. She feels guilty about it and hates the thought of anyone doing the same just because of that fact now.

Overall I’d have to say for gems that would not originally see eye to eye now she is ride and die for the smaller fusion and she will do anything she can to help her crack a smile and feel loved and accepted.  

For Peridot Kyanite showed great interest in her upon first forming, but once she became more of her own person and moved on to other things. She initially grew apart from the nerd a tad. Despite this Peridot is still there to lend support and over invasive un-intentional ways to keep Kyanite safe.

Peridot gets a lot of the full brunt of Ky’s notorious comments and the butt of Kyanite’s jokes now, but she takes it in stride because she’s quite inept at the comedy.

She’s remained very loyal to the gem even though Kyanite has robbed her of many of her sweets over the years.

Peridot is a very quick ‘yes man’ rather than the one to tell Kyanite no she can get easily brought into Ky’s good gracious because of nostalgia.

Peridot truly cares for Kyanite and even the company she surrounds herself with it’s just there are times when she has her own opinions she can’t silence. 

Nothings too good for Kyanite when it comes to providing for her. Peridot is the first one to give her some money for all the little things she wishes to purchase on the side.

While Kyanite may see Peridot as an old “Childish” friend now Peridot remains swift and cunning whenever Kyanite may try to trick her into doing something that is less to her ideal values.

They bump heads a lot when it comes to Ky’s love interests. It’s all because of the fact Peridot believes Kyanite deserves better upstanding people.

She knows Kyanite has a low image of herself which is a shame because Peridot actually thinks she’s got the most value in the whole family’s ranking.

Peridot holds onto every bit of memory of Kyanite once preferring her but despite this she’s happy being number 2 favorite or 3rd behind everyone else. So long as she still wants her around and loves her all the same.

After all she still needs her Peri hugs!

Pumpkin. You would think I would have little to no information about these two. However, I have Plenty. Even though Pumpkin is a mere veggie head she has tried to be as loyal as they come.

It’s no doubt that as the only dog presence Ky’s had Pumpkin has made colossal efforts to get close to the fusion. It’s just hard since she seems to perfer the similarly named family cat

Pumpkin makes a point to Ky to show little miss thing that she has commanding authority in this house often barking to wake her up every morning! Especially cleaning days and Sundays.

The vegetable gets quite the snooty turned up nose from Kyanite but that only makes her lick her face more vigorously and grabs her pants and leggings with her mouth in order to guide her to the places of the house Pumpkin wants her to go.

This crafty fruit can be fast at snatching things from Kyanite’s room like scattered clothes or shoes if she isn’t careful and has the habit to rip up her fishnet socks if they are left.

She has a bad rap of being secretly a ghost crime boss reincarnated and while we have no proof of that being the case. Pumpkin will cackle and wrap her tail around Kyanite’s ankle seemingly teasing. (we think?!)

Upon opening the door Pumpkin is the first to hop over her footrest at that end of her bed and jump onto Kyanite point blank and bark in her window as an effective alarm clock she takes this job seriously

Anytime Kyanite is on the couch Pumpkin will climb up beside her and slowing down these days Pumpkin will lay on her back in hopes that Kyanite will give her some affection.

She will growl if she hears unfamiliar noises inside Kyanite’s room grab her sleeves in her teeth and guide her out of harms way.

It’s good to be wanted and even though she’s not favored Pumpkin won’t let her forget she lives there and loves her as any good dog would.

[jinjojess]

DR Kirigiri Vol. 5 Summary Part XI

It is finally time to start chipping away at Chapter 2 of DR Kirigiri Vol. 5!

< LAST PART | NEXT PART >

Chapter 2 Not-So-Daily Life*

(*or “Deadly Life” if you want to be consistent with the localized games)

This chapter starts with Samidare returning to her room at the dorms in the early morning hours, as has become custom as of late. Since classes have started for the day, there’s no one around, making the entire area feel creepy and surreal. 

I rushed to my room, seeking its life-saving comfort, and threw open the door.

But…Kirigiri wasn’t there.

I had expected that she of all people would have already solved her mystery, and I’d find her curled up in my bed, but instead I found nothing in the futon. It wasn’t even warm, hinting that she hadn’t returned yet.

I collapsed into bed and passed out. It was a dreamless, death-like sleep.

I woke up to the sound of a bell, shooting up in bed and looking around to assess my surroundings.

Looking around, soaked in sweat and suffering chills, I realized I wasn’t at the site of a bizarre murder, or trapped within a creepy building. It was just my room.

Whew.

I’d been able to come home safely. Even as my head pounded from the drop in my blood pressure, the sense that this was real finally began to wash over me. 

I looked at the clock to find that it was already noon. The bell I’d heard was the school bell signaling we were halfway through the day.

Next, I checked my phone; this was the set time we’d agreed upon to check in. I was supposed to hear from Yaki at twelve sharp, followed by Yadorigi fifteen minutes later, then Mizuiyama, and finally Kirigiri. 

Even though it was five past noon, though, I didn’t get a call from Yaki.

Without bothering to tame my bedhead, I trudged to the dorm’s cafeteria and switched on the TV there. A news report announced Yaki’s death, on the corner of a shuttered up shopping street.

So he was killed…

Though he hadn’t been the most approachable type, he had been a good person, and very cooperative.

If we hadn’t asked him to help us with the investigations, he’d probably still be alive. No matter how you sliced it, his blood was on my hands. I might as well have killed him myself. Me. I killed him. I…

I hid my face in my hands in the empty cafeteria, hiding in the darkness behind my eyelids.

This was the path I had chosen.

The one Kirigiri had been walking all this time.

No matter how hard I worked to protect people, in the end, I couldn’t save everyone’s lives. No matter what, I had to make choices about who to save and who to let go.

Though, maybe if I’d been talented enough, I could have saved him.

Please, just let me save more people…

At that moment, my phone buzzed in my hand. I didn’t recognize the number.

“…Hello?”

“Is this Samidare Yui-san? This is Tooakitsu Nazuna.”

“Ah!” I was so happy to hear a familiar voice that I looked up without thinking. “Naz-chan! What’s up? How did you get this number?”

“Detective Yadorigi asked me to call you at exactly 12:15. You had an agreement about checking in, yes?”

“Oh, yeah, I mean… Man, how dependable.”

After the whole ordeal, Nazuna, Tsukiyo, and Yadorigi all went to the hospital in the ambulance. They recommended I come along too, but I just wanted to get home as soon as possible and regain some sense of normalcy. 

“Yadorigi-san is currently in the ICU. He was conscious on the way to the hospital, but given that he sustained a head injury, you never know how things may go.”

“Yeah… Naz-chan, are you and Tsukiyo okay?”

“There’s nothing wrong with us. Tsukiyo-san is sleeping right here beside me.”

“That’s good to hear…”

“Also, I have a message for you from Yadorigi-san.”

Nazuna told me the details of the Kareobana Academy case. Since I hadn’t actually been a part of it myself, the whole thing sounded outrageous.

“Thanks, that means we’ve solved at least one of the cases so far. I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to thank Yadorigi-san.”

Without him, we’d have been trapped in the Libra Girls’ Academy forever, and the case would have gone unsolved. On top of that, he even solved the Kareobana Academy case too. No wonder–Rank 2 detectives were on a whole other level.

Perhaps best of all, he hadn’t betrayed us in the end. Though even without the whole Mizuiyama thing, I was so happy that someone as attentive and skilled as him was helping us that I could have cried. 

“By the way, what happened to the Mystery Club? It looked like they came with you to the hospital…”

“After making sure Yadorigi-san was okay, they headed to the police station. Apparently they went to let them know what happened during the case.”

“Oh yeah? Well, I’ll leave that part of it to them, then. Sounds like they’ve got it.”

“Indeed. Oh, also, Yadorigi-san said one last thing. ‘It may be inevitable that I need to retreat from the front lines, but I have no intention of giving up. I need to fight for her sake.’”

“Her sake?”

There was only one person he could mean.

So, she really had been that important to him. I felt like I could more or less tell why he’d decided to help us. Perhaps it was simply by chance that he was on our side. 

After the message, Naz talks about how cool Samidare was, and how even though she’s a high school student like her and Tsukiyo, she seemed so much older and wiser. Samidare protests, claiming that she didn’t do much of anything, and asks if she’s calling her an old lady, to which Naz says no, and she shouldn’t be so modest. The way she was ready to protect them no matter what was really impressive, and she thinks that being a detective is a really noble profession. 

In fact, she asks Samidare if she too could become a detective someday, and in the process of answering that hell yeah, she’s got the stuff, Samidare remembers that there’s some significant drawbacks to the life. 

She remembers what Mizuiyama asked her earlier:

“But who saves the heroes who save so many others?”

Her words echoed in the back of my brain.

Who did save detectives when they were hurt or in trouble?

“Samidare Yui-san. When this is all over, can we meet up again?” Nazuna asked.

“Sure, of course. Hey, when summer comes, let’s all go to the beach.”

“That sounds great. I’ll have to lose some weight before then.”

And with that promise for sometime in the unknown future, we hung up.

It was 12:30.

It was time for Mizuiyama to check in, but given that she was currently under arrest, that probably wasn’t going to happen.

As soon as I thought that, my phone rang.

Worried, I pressed the button to accept the call. 

“Hello…?”

“You know there is no need to be that frightened of me, right?”

It was Mizuiyama.

Dun Dun DUUUUUUUN!

< LAST PART | NEXT PART >

[hazbinextgeneration]

Into The Casino Ch16

(WARNING: Fight scenes including hair pulling and a death is contained within this chapter as well as past abuse mentioned. If this makes you uncomfortable please don't read. You have been warned.) What happened on the way home was..Well...Interesting to say the least. The strange warm feeling in his chest still hadn't gone away even after they were leaving. The gal feeling exhausted enough to fall asleep against his shoulder and ONLY because he was a gentleman, he wrapped an arm around her and allowed her to lean against him on the way home. Cyber was a little confused on his silence and the face he made as he glanced out the window on the way back, but she chalked it up to him calculating about the new possible deals he could make or perhaps maybe he was thinking about how to con someone over again. He had that hard thinking face over him and it was best to let him think at times. So she didn't argue when the limo finally stopped in front of their home, and he lightly shook the sleeping beauty awake. Her purple eyes blinking and she yawned tiredly, and he told Cyber to go take her back and make sure she got some rest. Thankfully Leaving Minight in charge with Disease following her orders was a grand idea. No harm was done to the place while they were gone. ....Sleep didn't come easy to him that night surprisingly but he managed. The next day was like it didn't even happen. In fact it was very normal. He got up, gave the usually orders to everyone who would get their assignments from him and told her the small list of personal things he needed her to be done that day. Which included cleaning out his office, but he made sure that all the valuable souls were very well secured and locked away where only he or Cyber could retrieve them. She smiled brightly and agreed as usually before trotting on her merry way...but this time that small warm feeling returned...he shrugged it off and continued onto the floor with Cyber. Business as usually.

Except the day after that the small feeling happened again. And again. And Again. And again. AND AGAIN!! Before he knew it nearly a month had passed with that strange small warm feeling in his chest was still there whenever he spoke to her, but he simply ignored it as he had better things to get done. Until one day he had a knock at the office door. He looked to the door for a moment before looking back down to the papers in his hands.

"Come in. Door's open." Well the door did open and in stepped the timid creature. He was a bit surprised she of all people would come in at this time of day, but he gave that famous smile none the less. "Aw, Pet.~ Hello, my dear. What can I do for you today? Is Disease bothering you again?"

She didn't answer straight away, but still gave a small smile. "N-No. I actually wanted to ask you something.''

"Ask away my dear! Im always happy to hear from you." Her question wasn't really something he would be expecting.

As she sheepishly rubbed her arm and looked everywhere but him. "A-Actually, I-I was wondering if you'd ever want to go dancing with me again s-sometime. I-It was really fun and I-" She looked back to him with a small smile. "I think..I want t-to get to know you better."

Well...that certainly was unexpected, but that just meant more progress! So he happily grinned politely as her sweet offer to him. "Darling. Of course! I would be delighted to spend time with you." His red eyes glanced to the grandfather on the otherside of the office before glancing back to her. "Tell you what. Why don't you join me for tea in an hour? We'll have plenty of time to talk then."

Her ears perked up with a bigger smile. "R-Really? S-Sure. I'd really like that."

He chuckled. "Very well then. In the meantime, do be a dear and fetch me another cup of coffee, will you? This business deal won't straighten itself out."

She happily agreed and he was eventually rewarded with a new steaming mug of coffee and he was happily looking through the papers he held within his hands as the clock clicked away on the wall across from them. Instead of leaving as soon as she gave him the mug, she stayed and looked curiously to the papers he held with innocent naivity. Oh it made him chuckle.

"What are you dealing with this time?" An innocent enough question.

"The owner of the winery next door has offered to sell it to me, but getting a hold of him is as easy as putting a fire out with gas." Which meant it wasn't easy at all. What could the fool possibly be doing that was so much more important than selling him the dam place if he offered in the first place?!

She made an 'oh' and blinked back to him. "Well I think it'd be a great addition to the casino."

"Is that right?"

She nodded. "Absolutely! With your business managing skills I bet you could connect the two easily. Maybe even open up a second larger bar inside it. Those are pretty popular as I've heard." Her brows furrowed in thought. "But maybe not make it so smoke ridden or blast that ridiculous excuse for music around, not a lot of people like those places. By the looks of all your friends at the party I'd say a few of them would pay a pretty penny to have one place around here that wasn't so....exotic like Rita's." She didn't even notice Lou had stopped midway through a sip and looked up at her. "With Midnight's potion making, you could probably even make your own brand and sell it too! Plus if you expanded the winery to double the size and enhanced the magical power of turning grapes into wine, I bet you'd get a lot more customers. A lot of people would like real authentic wine made from real grapes like on the surface instead of..how did Disease put it? 'Cheap gunk water'? And since you'd be able to grow your own grapes and own the brewery, you'd be able to make yourself some as well with no cost at all." She turned to him with a smile but paused seeing his face. "Oh..I-Im sorry. W-Was I talking too much?"

"..No. No actually. All those sounds like marvelous ideas!" He smiled before sipping that bitter tasting drink.

"Really?!"

He chuckled again. "But of course. But I am curious. Where did you learn all your business know how anyhow? I know you explained your father was a prominent business man, probably not as successful as yours truly, but by what you told me about him and your past, he didn't seem too keen on letting a lady such as you keep on the family business. No offense."

Her eyes glanced down for a moment. "He-...He often dragged me along to..c-certain business meetings if he knew someone had a son. I heard a lot at those places."

He glanced up at her for a moment. "....And I am to assume he only brought you along to use you as some kind of token in case he saw an opportunity to use you to get information from said sons? Or am I assuming something too large?"

"No. You're p-pretty spot on. He didn't see me for anything else."

"What of your mother?" If she was spilling information, he might as well get as much as he could get from her. Never know when it might come in handy.

She shrugged. "I don't know. My parents got divorced when I was a baby and she...s-she left me with him. N-Never met her."

"Oh, I see....Well I am sorry for your situation." He went back to his papers with another sip.

"Thank you..." She looked at him. "What was your family like?"

He paused...before blinking and looking back up to her. "My family?" She nodded and he went silent for a moment. ".....They were...terrible people let's say. A gambling man and his not so wonderful wife is what resulted in myself."

"Is that why you're so good at running a casino?"

He chuckled. Oh if only she really knew the many nights he was forced from a young age to stand watch as his father and his 'friends' gambled any and all money away, drinking away their sorrows. Of course he never did, instead he was much more interested in what the men did with the cards. And eventually he swiped a deck himself and began practicing when he was bored, which lead to him developing his own tricks. His own destiny carved out by himself. And the name he made back on the surface. He sometimes wondered if his name was still up there somewhere besides obviously on a tombstone. Were there any records of himself from his bloody gang wars? Probably not because then he was still nothing but a small fish in a big pond, but you could imagine his surprise when he woke up to him tumbling down and hitting the sidewalk hard when he first got here. Confused as all hell but quickly able to recover. He had to claw his way up the ranks and fought tooth and nail to get there, but it all paid off now didn't it. Hard work always paid off in the end in his experience. Sometimes he wondered what his poor parents faces would be if they could see him now? An overlord of hell and richer than they would ever dream! That's the difference between him and them. He was smart with his money and knew how to play the game.

"You could say so. But I like to believe it's more thanks to my natural ability to spot the obvious good things in life before they slip away.~"

"Oh. Well I'd say you have a wonderful ability!"

He chuckled more at her politeness. "Thank you. But now I believe I promised that tea."

Things were FINALLY starting to look more progressive with Midnight's assignment as over the next few days she was finally able to restore them to their (almost) original state and they looked a lot cleaner than when he first got them. He was pleased none the less, but she told him they'd need to test them which was a small problem. Obviously he couldn't let anyone know he had them for confidential reasons, so it'd be a bit tricky. But he would figure it out later. He was making great progress bout everywhere it seemed. The pretty pet wanted to spend more time with him and he was happily to oblige, sometimes for tea, other times for that promised dancing he promised. He was surprised to find out she knew the jitterbug and charleton, though it was quite obvious she was still rusty. He was happy to escort her through the small steps and be close to her-..Uh! I mean to get her to easily go with what he said of course. It had nothing to do with her giggles or the surprise squeaks she'd make when he surprised her, or the fact she basically enjoyed the same things he did. It was just because he enjoyed dancing and it was nice to have someone compliment his singing and dancing skills. But it certainly stroked his ego as Midnight would oh so lovely put it. She wasn't...bad to have around. Compliments and politeness aside, she was very down to earth and ..surprisingly passionate. Actually dimallishing Rita's bar when he asked her what could be better about it. He laughed and honestly wondered what Rita would think if she knew someone as weak as her thought her place was a 'smelly bin of smoke and sweat that needed a few windows and MORE than just a few scented candles'.

Well after that little laugh he knew just the position to promote her to. So when he called her up to come to his office, she was pretty surprised when he explained why.

She blinked. "Personal asisntant?"

He hummed and nodded. "That's right, Dear! I feel as if merely being a secretary was ..undermining your abilities. You'd still have your duties AS my secretary but with more duties added on. But I promise the extra work would be worth the effort."

"What exactly are they?"

"You'd be entrusted with taking care of my more personal property. For example you're now in charge of making sure my space her is always in order and things are where I can find them, you'd be in charge of making sure my meals are delivered, and of course as my right hand asistant you'd be accompying me on business if it calls for it. But if it sounds too much too soon for you, I'll gladly just not give the promotion."

And wouldn't you know it. Hook. Line. And sinker. He made it seemed like something much better than it was and of course she agreed right away it would be a fantastic idea. And the next day she got too it. If there was another thing he could say about her it was that it was she was a hard worker, and she worked her tail off to prove she earned that little spot. Or maybe it was because some part of her still felt scared or intimidated by him. Didn't matter for now. Progress was being made throughout. She would still flinch lightly when he wrapped an arm around her or patted her back, but it was MUCH better than before. Couldn't say the same thing about everyone else or big crowds. She still was timid around those and that was just fine with him. The less interaction beyond his little crew the better. He gets to spend more time with her and vise versa! Everyone wins. Especially him. Though there was still a matter of that small warm feeling that wasn't really that small anymore, and he had a sneaking feeling as to what it could've possibly been, but he still pushed the unimportant thing aside for now. Right now he had FINALLY gotten a hold of the man who wanted to sell him the place and it was certainly about time. He should have the documents on his next business run. Which would happen to be his little pet's first one with him to be exact. Not anywhere special, just the casino floor. Laughing, cheers, and music filled the air within the casino as demons of all kinds gambled their money away or drank themselves drunk. A usual day for the casino staff....Well, almost everyone. The clicking of hooves made their way down the hallway towards the more noisier side of the whole casino. The woman flipped through the many papers piled within her arms. She finally pulled one from the back, scanning her eyes over it before looking up at the person walking next to her smiling nervously. "T-The deed to the winery next door has successfully been obtained like you wanted." The taller male smiled down at her. "Excellent!" He snatched the document from her and smirked down at it. "With this we'll no longer have to rely on cheap black market booze. How much have we left in stock, Pet?" Her ears went back at the nickname, but answered, "I....don't know. I haven't looked yet." He hummed and gave her a look. "Go ask Rouge, that beer bug ought to give you the answer, then get back to me."

Her eyes blinked confused up at him and she rose a brow. "Rouge?"

A sudden realization came over him and he sighed. "Oh, yes! You two haven't properly been introduced yet! Silly me!" From where they were standing he pointed a hand across the giant room where she could barely make out the bar. "Rouge is one of my floor managers but she mostly just handles the many bars and kitchen areas I have around here. You can't miss her really. She really bugs you persay." He chuckled..but sighed again at her still confused face. "She's a bug demon. Green hair, wings- You can't miss her."

"Oh. I see."

"Yes, now be a dear and ask her how much stock we have so I can calculate how soon we can easily use my newly obtained purchase.~" A red claw was extended to pull back a stray gold hair from her face. She visibly flinched at the touch and stopped an her purple eyes darted at him. He only chuckled and leaned forward a little. "You can do that. Can't you, Pet?~" She gulped and managed to not stutter despite the heat in her face. "Of course I can." His hand patter her cheek before retracting back and chuckling. "I thought so.~ Now-" He began walking again with her quickly following behind. "-I must go speak with a very important client. No go find Rouge. She'll give you what you need." "Yes, Sir." He often used nicknames with her and very flirty gestures, but after working for him for a couple months she got used to it....Kinda. He seemed to get a chuckle out of seeing her squirm and those god forbidden squeak sounds she made. Though putting up with his antics was better than fighting for survival on the streets. Even if it meant her hand. They came to the end of the hallway where the loud sounds of music and voices were. Without so much but a side smile at her, he turned to the left and quickly disappeared among the crowd of other demons. She watched after him for a moment, but soon went the opposite way. It wasn't comfortable being around so many possibly dangerous demons, but most were too busy with their games to pay attention to her. The ones that DID she knew stared at her body(or more specifically her exposed leg or horn). She made the mistake of looking into the face of one of her 'admirers' as she walked past. The grimy man visibly smirked at her and licked his fangs.....which made her cringe, duck her head, and pick up her pace. The bar couldn't be far now, right? ....Right! The bar wasn't as crowded as he thought it'd be, but it was still pretty packed. In the middle of it all was the flutter of green wings as the insect demon passed out drinks fast with ease. Years of experience right there. And she blinked. That must've been the Rouge Lou was telling her about. She didn't notice her at first, but (when she got close enough) Rouge smiled in her direction and placed her hands on the counter as she sat down. "Hey there, Fuzzy. You here for a drink?" She gestured to the wide shelves behind her. "We got lots of choices to choose from, so pick your poison." She smiled and took a seat. "N-No. Lou wanted to know how much alcohol was left in stock." Rouge rose a brow in confusion and she remembered that they hadn't been introduced yet. So not one for being rude, she stuck a hand out. "I-I-Im Amalfia. Your coworker? Im sure we hadn't met." She still looked confused before she gave a knowing smile and grabbing her hand. "Oh yeah! I recognize your name from Disease telling me all about you and the big guy spending some time together." She smiled before looking down at the paperwork she held then back to her. "Someone's been busy." She brought her arms up to rest them and the papers on the bar and gave a smile. "It's not that bad. It's certainly better than doing laundry o-or sweeping the floors, b-but Im just here because he wants to know how much stock you all have left." She snorted. "With all the chores he makes ya do, I'm surprised he doesn't dress you up in a mad outfit." Instead of getting the suggestive joke, the unicorn cocked her head to the side in confusion. "Why would he have me do that? I'm pretty sure he already has cleaning staff." "...Never mind." She waved a hand dismissively before leaning off the counter. "You said you wanted to know the booze level. Alright. It'll take me a couple minutes though." "I can wait." "Alright. HEY!" Her head snapped to the right as she shouted. Another demon glared at her from the other side of the bar. "Cover me for a bit. I need something from the back." Rouge left without another word, disappearing through a door between the two shelves of alcohol as the other bartender kept serving the demons that came. Leaving her surrounding by patrons grumbling for their drinks or passed out drunk on the bar. It was fine though. She was usually left alone if she just kept her eyes down and didn't engage with anyone. This wasn't the case though. As she busied herself by flipping through the small stack of papers in her hands, she barely noticed someone sit n the stool next to her, which really wasn't a big deal. It was a free bar after all. What she did notice however was the sudden ever so light feeling of someone touching her leg- "DON'T TOUCH ME!!" Her body reacted far faster than her mouth did. Whipping around towards the danger, her body on high alert from the unwanted invasion of her personal space. Sitting there was the very same demon she'd made the mistake of seeing. Her shout had seemed to catch the attention of some others around her though. The demon smiled and stared down at her like she was a prime steak. Unintentionally, she swallowed and leaned away. She probably looked more scared than she would've liked. "I-I....I don't like strangers touching m-me. Please g-go away." At this, he chuckled and leaned down eye level. "I remember you-" Her eyes visibly widened at this, and her nose wrinkled up. His breath smelt like an unwashed dumpster. He pointed a finger before saying, "Don't you remember me?..It took me a while to figure out where you were after running into me at that d*mmed club. But seeing you on the arm of that rich boy, it didn't take too long after that." She sat there frozen. "I-I...I'm really s-s-sorry, Sir, if you think that. B-But Im sorry."

He leaned his head back in laughter before hissing and leaning closer to her. "You REALLY don't recognize me, do you? I would've thought an empty headed gal like you would've made it somewhere more innocent for that pretty little head of yours. Guess not. Suits me just fine. Wouldn't you say?...Dorothy?"

She absolutely froze. Ice was traveling through her veins and his smile got wider at her absolutely terrified face. "...no." Was all she was able to force out of her terrified form at the rush of her realization and old name hit her harder than a freight train- A sudden shriek cut from her throat as something had grabbed a large fistful of her poor blonde and white hair and pulled her head back. Her hand immediately flew up to the giant hand and began to claw at it to no avail. He somehow got closer to her face. "Y'know...It's been a long time since I last saw you. Thought you still seen the last of me huh?" Her body coursed with pain as her brain screamed for his unwanted touch to go away. To not let it happen again. "Let go of me! Put me down!" Her body thrashed against the iron grip of her captor which made him raise his hand higher, dragging her from her seat. She screamed and started kicking her legs out. The commotion caught the attention of a whole lot of others, but most seemed more entertained by the fight than concerned for her. By this point she thought her head would pop off with how much it hurt. Her kicking had already sent her papers all over the ground below them. "I wonder how much a second owned horse would go for-" Another hand pressed her cheek. "A pure little thing like you would be worth a lo-AAAAHHH!!" The squirming flesh in her mouth tasted horrible, but something told her to keep her teeth clamped down. The demon cursed and pulled against her. Pushing her head back further.

"What THE F*CK are you doing?!" The female voice and the demanding tone behind it was enough to make the male demon stop and look down. By some miracle, Rouge had returned, probably hearing their screams, and was glaring at him with enough bite to put a cobra to shame. Her eyes flashed to her crying, squirming body held up by him for one split second. "....Okay, you burnt cherry lookin' mothaf*cker. You have one second to put Fuzzy down before I shove a bottle up your a$$." "Mind your own f*cking business!" Her jaw's grip had loosened in the few seconds after Rouge's return, so it was easy to finally slip his hand free to point at the much smaller demon and start yelling at her. Which gave her only a few moments to react. It was obvious this guy was physically stronger and wasn't planning on letting her go anytime soon. She sure as h*ll wasn't going back to being his to boss around. Not after so many years of FINALLY getting away. Not having to look over her shoulder, finally enjoying herself for once in her entire existance. She wouldn't go back to that enclosed prison again. So, in her panicked state, there was one very obvious solution- "LOU!!," she shrieked at the top of her lungs. Drowning out any other sound from her brain, "LOU, HELP!!" The tears dulled her vision somewhat so the next moments were a bit blurry, but no one could miss the obvious chair that came flying out of nowhere and collided with him full force. Sending them both to the floor. The sudden release from her hair was a relief compared to the smack to the floor....but it was better than being held in mid air. Her head tingled with dulled pain still, but there was no time to linger on that when a demonic cry and gagging sounds came next to her. Once again her body reacted before her conscious brain did and she sat up and away....and her eyes widened. The demon was the one making the gagging noises and flailing about like a fish out of water. The clawing at his neck directed her to the green rope like appendage firmly wrapped around it. Small red spikes dotted along it's sides. Before another shot out of no where above her making her whimper and duck as another red spiked green rope wrapped around the struggling demon's hand, and another grabbing his other hand. His red snout which didn't look good from the chair colliding with him, was held firmly shut as the green things wrapped him more than a mummy until he could barely move and was dropped to the floor in front of her. Another screech got her attention as well as some others. Her purple eyes widened at who was screeching. "Lou?" The plant demon was transfixed on the still choking demon. A fixture of rage and something she couldn't quite place on his face. He seemed to also be struggling as Cyber was death gripping his waist to hold back the snarling beast. "Lou, STOP! That's enough!" He didn't stop. "LOU!!" He froze. Everything seemed to freeze for those few agonizing moments...before his body slowly began to relax back and he blinked. "......Lou?" His head snapped to the unicorn looking up at him from the ground with a confused gaze....then around at all the patrons still watching- He quickly straightened up, reaching to fix his bowtie and hat, as if it never happened, before snapping his fingers. The vine around the guy's neck loosened and slunk away leaving him hacking and coughing. She let out a loud squeak as more vines wrapped around her suddenly and hoisted her up and over towards the two. There, she was firmly placed next to him and she gladly went behind the plant demon. He rose a brow at the fightened shaking lady as she death dripped his shirt and those purple eyes stared in absolute fear at the man gasping for breath on the floor before he hissed up at them.

"You little b*tch! Hiding behind that stupid fatcat like he's some shield for your petty little behind! You never could be stronger than me could you!? You were always too weak to do anything!!"

Now, he had made a gave mistake. He was willing to just beat him to a pulp and leave him on the streets, after all no one made a sceen in his casino without consequences and he was already in such a foul, but what had just come out of his mouth seemed to make a difference. A hiccup escaped from behind him and he slowly turned his raised brow to the woman now pressing her face to his back, not daring to look up. "Is he...?"

Her whimper was and what he had just said confirmed on just who this man was. Well, well. This day had just gotten interesting, now didn't it? What a stupid, stupid move for this poor soul to make. Lou slowly turned his gaze back to the struggling form of the cursing man in front of him. Oh he knew EXACTLY what to do with him.

"Cyber. Take this lowlife trash to Midnight, and keep him there until I come up." He turned back to the terrorfied female behind him before reaching an arm behind him and pulling her from behind him to his side. "You are coming with me." Cyber gave him an overly confused look with a," Uh. Sure, Boss." She watched silently as Lou led the horrified gal away from the cussing man and watching crowd and without so much as another word, she blankly looked down to the guy trapped in vines and rose a brow as he uselessly dug his grave by cussing her out. With ease she grabbed the vine cocooned man and threw him over her shoulder. Rolling her eyes as he cussed and screamed his way through the crowed. Leaving Rouge there extremely confused to the events that just played out. ".....Da f*ck just happened?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It took a while for him to calm her down from her very obvious panic attack which left her clinging and crying into him for the longest time as he shushed her and attempted to sooth her over like how Midnight would sooth Disease in one of his moments. Eventually she was able to get a hold of herself and just sat there in his grip hiccupping and wiping at her face for a while. When he thought she was able to be steady by herself he finally let go and she didn't make any protests when he did. Just try to pull herself together from the ordeal. Which left him to sigh and finally to go and sit in his chair for a while- He groaned and reached up to rub at his temples. The soft office chair hugged his slumped over body as he racked his brain. A small thump from the desk made him open his eyes and noticed the small white cup that was placed in front of him. The smell of coffee and weed killer filled the air, and on top of it all was the smiling face of the unicorn. "Thank you." He grabbed it before chugging it down half way. She gave him a bigger smile. "I thought you'd want that after the fight back there." He dryly chuckled. Oh, yes. The fight. He honestly didn't know what to think of it all. One moment he was casually talking up one of his more richer clients, alomost sealed the deal too, when the first screams rang out. At first, he didn't pay much attention to it, if there was a fight then the bouncers would take care of it. That's what they were paid for. What he DID pay attention to was the screaming of his name- "LOU!! LOU, HELP!!" You could say he snapped around faster than a bullet. Completely confused to who could've been shouting for him- Until he saw it. The struggling form of Amalfia struggling against a sickly cherry red demon with his hand gripping her hair. What happened next was something he couldn't quite explain. It was almost like someone flipped a switch and red clouded his vision. Though throwing a chair and making a scene in front of his customers was a blur, he would've never done that otherwise. Something his head couldn't wrap around he supposed. The only logical thing he could come to was that he became overly angry at having his pretty little weapon in danger of being taken from him and his power hungry instincts took over for a little bit. What else could it have been? "Yes. Well-" He sat back up bringing the cup with him. "I don't tolerate strangers placing their hands on the woman I intend on marrying. I would advise against going back there anytime soon." "But, my papers-" "I'll send Cyber to retrieve them." He gave the cup a look before glancing back at her. ".....This coffee tastes a bit old. Why don't you go make a new pot?" "Alright. I get the hint. But, Lou-" A Soft hand reached out to gently squeeze his free hand. "I mean it. Thank you." She slowly removed herself from by the desk and made her way over to the doorway. He sat there frozen for what seemed like forever before slowly clenching his free hand. What the h*ll was wrong with him today?! He gave a frustrated growl before reaching up to remove his hat and run those red digits through his blonde locks of his, whatever. He would feel like himself soon again anyways. But he had other business to attend to that he certainly was not going to overlook or leave as a threat to any of his plans.

***********************************************************************************

He had to wait for her to go to sleep which took a little longer than usually thanks to the mongeral's scare from earlier, but it's nothing some reassurance and warm drink couldn't help. He didn't know why but-...under that calm smile of his anger resurfaced and he gave off a frustrated growl as soon as he left the room and started making his way towards Midnight's lab, which was just a little ways from his dance room. And with his fast pace fueled by the anger in his veins it didn't take long for him to get there. But what first graced his ears was loud muffled mumbles coming from the inside of said lab and his anger started to turn in that direction. The door was pushed open maybe a little more forcefully than he'd like but that didn't matter to him in the moment and he just stood there in the doorway. Rasing a brow at what he was met with. The table Midnight used for....'things' was currently occupied by the struggling red skinned demon, the vines removed for favor of the clamps on the table, Cyber was standing right next to the table looking at him and shrugged. And a little ways from her was a grumpy as ever looking Midnight and a frowning snake flicking his tongue out at the guy...and he just now noticed the mongral had a black eye to match the rope around his mouth.

"..Did I miss something?"

"Eh...The guy got some colorful language and decided to use it on Midnight," she jabbed a thumb behind her at the grumpy looking which. "Disease wasn't too happy let's just say.''

He hummed as he walked into the room, hands behind his back and gave him a calm half lidded look without the smile. Rage burning behind those lidded red eyes of his. The guy glaring at him with absolute hatred behind that gag of his. "...Remove the gag."

Cyber did as she was told without question and with one pull the rope fell from the douchbag's snout. He coughed a few times before glaring up at him. "YOU F*CKING SON OF A B*TCH!! I'LL PLUCK YOUR PETALS AND SNAP YOUR F*CKING STEM YOU TWAT!!"

Lou's face didn't change and instead rolled his eyes. "Simpleton. You all always resort to petty curses and empty threats when you're about to meet your end. Midnight." The witch looked up from..whatever she was currently mixing together and with a sinister smile plastoring itself onto his face, he pointed to the strapped down man. "We found the new volunteer for your projects. Let's hope they prove useful research eh?"

The guy's eyes widened and snapped to the witch who all of a sudden didn't look so grumpy and was staring dead at him with...calculating eyes, before struggling against the table's restraints and glaring back him. "YOU F*CKING B*ST*RD!! LET ME OUT!!"

he hummed and tapped in his in mock thought. "Um...No. You see, you could've scared off one of my plan's assets and I simply cannot have that. So as punishment you get to help Midnight test out some of our other assets for this the small takeover I hope to achieve.~ Isn't that wonderful? Too bad you won't live to see it."

"WHY YOU FU-" The guy's snout was slammed shut by Cyber after Lou nodded to her. With incredible strength, she held his red jaws shut with one hand while looping the rope back around it with the other. Midnight already looked a little better, digging through one of the draws of her desk and pulling out a few potions and things she was eager to use. As for him?...He deserved a good night's sleep after today. He felt oddly satisfied and wanted to leave them to it. Turning on his heel he took a few steps before stopping in the doorway.

"Oh..By the way.'' He looked over his shoulder. Smile and red eyes glowing in the dark. "You missed out on having a remarkible lady by your side. I guess in a way I should really be thanking you. In a sense you pushed her to me and I couldn't be happier.~" Cyber rose a brow again at him happy tone. "But we both know I won't do any of that."

The doors closed behind him and muffled cries cursed him from behind.

All characters except Amalfia belongs to @palettepainter

[letsperaltiago]

we'll turn this better thing to the best

HAPPY MAY 15TH, EVERYONE!

Prompt #57: "This is probably a bad time, but marry me?"

This is just me not being able to resist writing something about Jake and Amy celebrating (or trying to) their 3rd anniversary as a married couple. This is also me, yet again, beating around that smut-bush, huh??:))

Or 

Jake and Amy try to have a sexy anniversary-morning, but Mac Santiago-Peralta has other plans 

Read here or on ao3!

Nothing could ever come close to beating, even marginally, waking up to Jake Peralta already having his arms around middle in the lulling position that was spooning the length of her body like a perfectly fitting puzzle piece: a leg nudge in between hers while the other wrapped around them and his fingers mindlessly playing with the hem of her shirt. 

The appreciation for the current state they were in was especially appreciated and heartwarming when it was taken into consideration that there’d been multiple, horrible parts of their timeline where he hadn’t been around to do so.

Everything from the sudden chaos of being sent into WitSec with Holt to him and Rosa being falsely convicted were periods they both tried to not think of and dwell on. But of course, given the powerfull impression these times in their lives had made on them, it was sometimes hard not to compare; hard not to feel that much better simply because Jake was around and not taken from her anymore. They always made sure to appreciate the other, even during eventual fights or disagreement, and if they had to say one “positive” thing about the involuntary distance WitSec and prison had forced upon them it was that it had definitely only made them grow even fonder and stronger.

So this year, another year of waking up in his arms on what she knew was an extra special day, she obviously felt crazy butterflies zooming around her belly and snuggled back closer into his hold on her with still closed eyes and a tiny content smile on her face.

This year’s anniversary had to be enjoyed for its small, tiniest moments, she knew. There was no time nor energy, they’d agreed, for grand gestures and outings when this May 15th all at once held the same special sentiment as previous year yet also a completely new range of feelings.

Today, for the past three years, May 15th had been a special date which held a dear place in both Jake and Amy’s hearts as it reminded them of the day that sealed their love for eternity. Although this year, their third anniversary, May 15th 2021 to be exact, was simply a tiny bit more special than usual: this year they weren't just the two of them - this year they had a teeny tiny son and he was as soft and sweet as he was time-craving and a tiny character of his own. Especially on a day like today, filled with an extra dash of love and reflecting upon the past, life before Mac seemed vaguely blurred: not in a bad way per se, just not as perfectly chaotic and wonderful as now that Mac Peralta was around.

Amy, still somewhat half-sleeping, quietly relished in her husband’s affectionate embrace and in the thought of having her entire world, Jake and baby-Mac, within the four walls of her home on a special day like this, but nonetheless also made sure to give some extra appreciation to the fact that Mac had been sleeping since she last fed him before bed last night. Considering the intense teething period he was currently going through that was truly a miracle she did not dare to fully believe in, but perhaps, just maybe, her little one could sense that it was mommy and daddy’s day today.

The feeling of her husband switching a bit in his spot against her back paired with a pleased sigh caught her attention hinting at the fact that he was surely somewhat awake, and though Amy wanted him to enjoy the tiny amount of sleeping in Mac they were currently offered, she also happened to crave his woken presence, deep brown eyes and loving smile.

“Happy 3 years of childish, distracting marriage…” as if on cue, having read her thoughts, Jake mumbled tiredly into the back of her head before reposition himself closer to have his head rest in the crook between her shoulder and neck nuzzling his nose tiredly into the side of her face.

Gosh, she loved him so much it still, even after 6 years together, came crashing down on her like a huge wave of giddiness and first date-feelings. She smiled to herself at his congratulations. “Dito. It’s been 3 great ones, huh?”

“It has..,” He yawned loudly, “… Especially when our son decides to sleep in like this.”

“Especially then, yes,” she huffed out a small laugh sharing the sentiment even though the fact that her baby very rarely needed night feeds anymore also meant he was growing up - too fast, if you asked her. Her barely 7-month old was wonderful and both parents had the time of their lives watching him grow up. Yet it was no lie that from time to time it’d hit Amy just how fast, almost by the day, her son grew, learned a new skill and became more of a an actual person. Sometimes even to an extent where it’d overwhelm her leaving her feeling borderline… sad? Even though it had been exhausting for the first few months, and still was from time to time, she also now kinda missed the little things like the ritual of breast-feeding. She loved sleep but loved the primal, instinctual feeling of nursing her son, even more the closeness that came with it, more.

“What time is it?”

Jake’s groggy voice snapped her out of her tumbling train of thoughts and forcing her to open her eyes to check the clock on her night stand.

“6 AM which means-“

Jake knew what his wife was about to say, but beat her to it and changed then and there somewhat narrative of their morning.

“Mac should be waking up anytime soon, I know but, babe, let him stay in bed till he asks to be picked up… Perhaps this is the morning we get lucky?”

Amy wanted to question what exactly that was supposed to mean but he beat her to it an said question was quickly answered by her husband’s warm lips sending thrills down her spine with the way they gently placed small, tender pecks to where his head had previously rested. Immediately she felt her body perk up in reaction to this and the heavy, tired feeling from before was gone within a matter of pecks. Alas, in the back of her mind, Amy knew and was still somewhat aware of three things:

One: where she wanted this to go

Two: where this could take them

Three: where her son was sleeping just 20 feet from their bed

“Jake,” the full-on whine that came out of her as provoked directly by his kisses was ascribable to two facts:

Firstly that, yes, she of course reacted by the book to her husband’s touches. But also, secondly, and if not more realistically, the fact that their sex-life had definitely simmered down for the past months - that’s what having a baby will do to you - and that it really didn’t take much for either of them, even less than before, to get foolishly, easily impassioned by the other’s intimate cues. One kiss, just a bit deeper than the casual peck, was apparently enough to throw all sense of control out the window.

If they used to be turned on by the other as effortlessly as faucets then they could now definitely be compared to gardens hoses playfully twisted by a kid’s hand as to block the water surge: bu with one move, the letting go of the hose, the water flow would pick right up where it’d been blocked within a matter of milliseconds and there was no stopping the powerful rush.

By then his hands, having previously rested on the soft remains of her baby bump that she tended to feel insecure about but he, on the other hand absolutely loved, had moved up under her night shirt only to continue to her breasts which definitely didn’t help her stay cool in the moment.

“Babe… ” she whined again even though she also definitely did not put  up her strongest fight: she loved nursing her son, and although the two matters were far from comparable, she would also be the last one to complain about Jake benefiting from her breast in… other ways.

“… Mac is in the room.”

“We can be quiet,” his pecks had evolved into love bites and passionate suckles the minute his hands made their way under her shirt, and by now it seemed like they’d reached the point of no return - sleeping baby son only feet away and all.

“You know we can’t,” she breathed heavily voicing her gradual subjection to the development of the moment while simultaneously trying to stay aware of her surroundings. Alas in vain and only to come to terms with having miserably, doubtlessly failed the second Jake managed to flip her to her other side thus enabling him to push her onto her back and using his weight kiss her even more deeply than before.

“Well…” he chuckled allowing himself a short break from her lips to speak although, obsessed and addicted, making sure to pick up where he left up as soon as his talking allowed a natural pause.

“… Either that or we’ll have to explain to our baby son why mommy and daddy were making weird noises in bed.”

“Jake!” she exclaimed at this statement, the hypothetical scenarios in her head getting too real, causing Jake to react right away by pulling away using his arms to hover his weight over her thus allowing her some space and them to look get a proper look at each other.

Suddenly his before aroused expression was replaced by a note of concern in both his eyes and voice. “I’m so sorry! We can totally stop if you don’t want to go any further. I didn’t mean to cross a line.”

Amy herself paused momentarily, mostly out of surprise since their mutual consent, after having been in a relationship so long, was rarely explicitly verbalised: generally being very attentive of the other during sex and knowing the other’s body and signals so well they could easily tell when to stop and when to move forward. Unless they were straight up experimenting and treading unknown land, their intimate moments had rarely to never caused this kind of sudden halts. So seeing this extra considerate side of her husband, although she never doubted that it was there to make her feel safe, made her heart flutter momentarily reminding her of the feeling of Mac’s tiny kicks inside her womb months ago.

“Hey, don’t worry,” she reassured him by reaching up to run her fingers through his curls aka. an attribute of Jake’s which their son (to her very immense satisfaction) had inherited. “I know you meant well and I didn’t mean to proclaim like that,” she made sure to throw on her warmest smile and eyes to reassure him. “I was just being weary of Mac, but I think I need to allow myself some…not very mommy-like pleasure.”

He smiled letting her speak out.

“Also I just, like completely out of nowhere, remembered reading this article pointing out that babies this young won’t actually… ” she tried to form her point in her mind whilst her husband looked at her with an amused smile on his face “… like, they won’t be affected by it so, I guess we could…”

How come she all of the sudden, as a woman in her late 30s, suddenly felt like a silly teenager when talking about something as natural to them as sex?

“Honey,” he disrupted her internal spiralling running a hand through her hair the way she’d so lovingly done just seconds ago. He trailed and picked at it where was spread out across her pillow with his fingers as his amused grin took on a more comforting nature. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t feel comfortable with, okay? Today’s date, and the fact that your butt will forever be the bomb, just got me caught up in the moment. But I totally get it if you feel weird doing anything with Mac around and you shouldn’t have to compromise that - even for me. It’s more than okay,” he lowered himself to peck her forehead before refocusing on her face and what she was about to say.

And how she loved him even more for always taking into consideration her feelings and reactions, even after 6 years together, but something about his strong arms flexing under his weight on either side of her head, his ruffled-up curls and already saturated, glowing even, pink lips made something in the back of her mind click. She quickly did the math in her head:

Mac was still an infant lacking anything near the ability to understand the nature of the sounds his parents were making and the concept of sex. He was feet away, safe in his crib with no direct outlook on them, and all of this was not even taking into consideration that he was still fast asleep. It was now or never - or so it felt like.

“Jacob Santiago-Peralta,” her eyes suddenly switched to a shade of dark, almost black, brown Jake hadn’t seen in quite a while immediately causing more than just his eyes to bulge. “We’re definitely inaugurating our third year as a married couple and we’re doing it now.”

And seeing a more than convincing look on his wife’s face Jake didn’t have to be told twice before crashing their lips together, resuming him repositioning himself between his wife’s thighs to give her sacred body, the one that carried their son for 9 months, the love it so very much and rightfully deserved.

Within minutes the very limited pieces of clothing they slept in were discarded, thrown carelessly onto the bedroom floor as if they were discovering each other for the first time, and after a reasonable amount of foreplay (mostly timewise since Mac waking up was just a matter of minutes) Jake painted a trail of sloppy kisses along his wife’s sleek collarbone as he, after a lot of shifting and moving around during preceding sexy actives, repositioned himself one last time.

Under the weight and spell of his naked body, physically and metaphorically,  Amy was desperately writhing having thrown all sense of control and modesty out the window a long time ago and grasped onto his upper back in a demand for more and an urge she’d put aside so many times these past months for the sake of dedication to being a mother.

“God, please don’t laugh at me when I definitely, ‘cause I will, finish within 5 minutes,” she finished her sentence with a moan as he bit down on the skin spurring her collar bones. Perhaps 5 minutes was even an optimistic exaggeration when her body already felt on the urge of exploding and he hadn’t even entered her yet.

She could tell her very honest comment earned her a soft chuckle, but she was too far gone and caught up in a whirlwind of pleasure to care plus, even if it would only last minutes, she just needed her husband inside of her now.

“5 minutes sound incredible, Ames,” he breathed out frankly not even minding the fact that their before very vigorous stamina had definitely gone downhill since having Mac. Instead he simply appreciated his favorite feeling in the world which, since the day he got to feel it for the first time, was the one of Amy Santiago wrapped around him.

Though he would never give it up permanently for anything in the world, even incredible sex with his incredible wife, he was just as excited as her to slip out of his father-role for what would probably end up being just a matter of 20 minutes in total or so. He was breathing heavily, growling, as he redirected his lips to hers where he hoped to, although the method had been proven faulty before, quell her upcoming sounds of pleasure.

“I love you,” she claimed out of breath bracing herself for the wonderful stretch she knew was approaching by the second.

“Love you too,” he sloppily replied between kisses. “So much,” was added in closing of the exchange of words of love as he braced and steadied himself for the initial thrust.

Then, planted so horribly perfectly that they could’ve sworn they were taking part in a movie, a cry cut through the thick intimate tension without delay bursting the bubble Jake and Amy had formed around themselves in the heat of the moment.

Becoming a parent came with the incredible ability to completely switch your focus within matter of seconds and thus react to whatever need your baby called out for. Right then and there was a perfect example, and though picking up where they’d come to, which was so close, seemed dangerously tempting they both knew there was no way they were actually going there.

They were a married couple wanting to celebrate each other and their love, yes, but first and foremost, even more importantly, they were parents.

Jake carefully bent his arms not needing the leverage anymore and lowered himself onto his wife before rolling onto his back besides her. Both started blankly into the air for second, almost unknowingly recreating the scene after their first time together, not saying anything but burning with repressed lust on the inside.

Then they broke into a collective chuckle.

Amy turned onto her side to look at her husband’s profile, taking it in before he imitated her action and they were left staring into each other’s eyes with knowing, amused expressions.

This was really their life now and though not always as easy as being “just married” it was definitely the life they’d always wished for and felt blessed to have. The irony of it all which existed in the clash between their love and physical yearning for each other, and their shared responsibility and love for their son, interruptions considered, was all at once humorous and tragic. But even then they had no doubt in their minds: their love for each other was unbreakable and celebrating their three years of marriage with their so very loved son interrupting much needed sex was still collectively considered somewhat perfect.

Nothing could ever take away the melting feeling she still got whenever Jake looked at her like he did now, so calm and in love, and knowing he now also shared that look with their son still reminded her of a surreal, perfect dream. He had so much love for the both of them: so much that she was sometimes convinced of the fact that it couldn’t be real. But then times like these reminded her of the fact that it was indeed very much so and that she would marry him all over again if she was given the chance.

The fussy sounds coming from the crib increased by the second and Jake knew that the second either of them decided to get up for their son, which would be sooner than later, this tiny bubble of an amorous moment would be gone. And so he decided to just go with what felt appropriate because, really and truly, looking at her right now he felt as if he could marry her all over again.

“I know our baby is screaming for attention, and that he needs it more than me and that this is probably a bad time but… marry me?” He smiled widely running a hand through her tousled hair earning him a just as wide smile of appreciation and adoration back.

She leaned in and offered him a kiss, long and tender but controlled as she knew she’d have to get up now. Managing to not get caught up she pulled back caressing his cheek with the hand that allowed him to feel the soft stroke of her wedding band and engagement ring.

“First I’m going to go get our son, but then…” she leaned in and gave his lips a final peck, this time withdrawing just enough to look at him but still have their noses touch before finishing what she’d started, “… Yes, I will marry you all over again, as many times as you want, every day, week, month and year, for eternity and beyond, Jake Peralta.”

[crowmagpie]

Voltron and the Hero's Journey through the Major Arcana of the Tarot

«The journey of the hero is the oldest story in the world. As the basic structure, it is woven into myths, fairy tales and legends that tell us how a person sets out to accomplish the great work. It is the story behind all these stories, which to this very day are always told in the same way under countless names in all languages and cultures over and over again.

<…>

The journey of the hero is the archetypical pattern of a range of actions woven from these primordial images. This is why, despite its many variations, the journey and the image are always so strangely familiar to us. They always tell of the quest, the adventurous search for the treasure that is hard to find, and are composed of elementary components.

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Yet, as often as this story has been told, as many collections of fairy tales and myths as it may fill, only once has it taken on a complete form as a whole in pictures – and this is in the 22 tarot cards of the major arcana. However, not only are the archetypical events illustrated in these motifs, many connections between individual stages become transparent in the structure of the cards. Their meaning for our path in life becomes comprehensible on the deepest level»

© «Tarot and the Journey of the Hero» by Hajo Banzhaf, Brigitte Theler, Christine M. Grimm

0. The Fool

The very beginning of the story, but by no means the moment since the beginning of the first episode. The story comes to its first stage when the future paladins, and for now completely unaware guys from the Garrison, get inside the Blue Lion and go into the unknown. The Fool depicts a person taking a step into the abyss. The one who doesn’t know where he or she’s going. The one who doesn’t know whether they’ll fall, whether they’ll step on a new ledge or take off. This person simply performs a somewhat thoughtless action - and sets off.

Then the paladins get to the Castle of Lions. There they meet another new phenomenon – literally a new race. Their consciousness expands when they learn that there are other races, other planets, that war is going on in space.

The Fool depicts the unknown, events when a person can’t even imagine what awaits him or her next. And so the paladins - they have no idea what awaits them further.

Also, many of them don’t have the necessary skills, and absolutely for everyone the piloting of Lions is absolutely new.

At the very first stage, they still don’t learn anything, they just try to do something, in the hope that it’ll work out.

Our heroes don’t yet have an idea of what purpose they have. But they will know this. Later.

1. The Magician

The second stage of the path and development of the paladins.

The Magician depicts a person that considers him/herself practically immortal and god-like. A person that is capable of a lot, the one who has an unlimited number of talents (the paladins definitely have individual talents) and thinks the whole world as one big playground. The main problem is that in spite of all the abilities and power, this person isn’t omnipotent and won’t end well without a proper training.

Paladins follow the path of The Magician, gradually mastering Voltron, starting to reap the benefits of their actions. They help, they save, they do a lot, they move their own way and, obviously, consider themselves the real saviors of the universe. They don’t know yet that their power will end where the strength of someone else begins.

2. The High Priestess

In the events of the series, The High Priestess finds several manifestations at once.

The High Priestess herself carries mystical experiences, secret knowledge, secrets that are carefully hidden, but will still emerge in the end. It has many meanings, but we need only a few.

The first correspondence to this card is Allura, possessing the gift of Altean magic, which is hidden deep inside her. We remember this from the episode when she gave new life to Balmera. But this moment will reveal itself later. In another archetype.

At this point, it’s only the power itself napping in Allura. She remains aloof from the battles of the paladins, maintaining a more passive position. Her potential is hidden inside, waiting in the wings. And it will come.

The High Priestess card is constantly revealed in the plot. Through secrets that pop up unexpectedly. For example, through a story about the past of Zarkon and the Galra.

In my personal opinion, this can also be attributed to the moment when the paladins decided not to act «in advance», but by some cunning, using Teludav. The secret may be the meeting of Keith, Hunk and Acxa inside the stomach of the Weblum, as no one knows Acxa yet. As well as revealing that Haggar is an Altean. She also fits the archetype of The High Priestess, but not as much as she fits the card that’ll be shown next.

3. The Empress

The archetype of The Empress is the archetype of Mother. The Mentor and the one who cares, who is willing to help. She is the inexhaustible source of all life, our creativity and our ability to embody something. But it is also a development of the situation, a period of abundance and good luck.

And this is again the archetype of Allura. However, she manifests herself as The Empress not so often as the plot requires. However, this is her arc of personal growth. It should be so.

The most important manifestation of her as The Empress, which can even be called the first, is the healing of Balmera. It was then that power began to awaken in her, which in the future would make her the real Empress, which would give her a lot. Moreover - in the future she’ll show herself as The Empress... with the help of Lotor. Because the Empress always needs the Emperor nearby.

In terms of the plot itself, these are all those moments when the paladins conceptualize something, when they seriously think about what’s happening. But the most important thing is a period of abundance for them, a period when they succeed and it seems that it will always be this way.

The highest manifestation of The Empress is Honerva. She’s both a mother and a ruling figure, who rules from the side, as if from a shadow. She has the power to create and great talents. After all, she’s a scientist. Exploring the matter that the Empress represents is her work. Also, in the future she’ll literally possess unprecedented power, Altean magic. As Haggar, she’ll still remain the Empress, but turned into a negative, like the inverted position of this card. The inverted Empress is a trick, a desire to rule over men, such a woman doesn’t care about her children and her family. A great embodiment of the archetype in action.

4. The Emperor

Under the card of The Emperor are all the rulers, people who have power, as well as those who adhere to serious rules and restrictions. Also, under this card are those who are ready to fight to the end, until their death. Those who have a certain cruelty and coldness. The Emperor is a regime and system that erases the powder of those who don’t correspond to it. He’s conservative and adamant, and it’s not easy to appeal to his heart, despite the fact that he’s inclined to impose his point of view, to teach and control. He suppresses any rebellion in the bud.

In other words, we smoothly come to the fact that the entire race of the Galra, in the form that it exists in most of the episodes, goes under the card of The Emperor. They have strict rules, many, even the most insignificant offenses are punishable by death, and their system works like a clock under the control of their ruler. The leader’s word is the law, the one who doesn’t respect the leader will meet his end. Stability is also part of their lives. Their emperor didn’t change for more than ten thousand years. They’re used to it. They’re used to a lot of things.

And then we go to the obvious personification of the archetype of The Emperor. That's right, to Zarkon. He’s so consistent with this card. Not only is he literally an emperor in his empire, but if before the Rift he was just a serious ruler, a leader capable of holding everything in his hands, then he combined the worst features of the Emperor. He’s a despot and tyrant who doesn’t care about others. He only adjusts everything for himself - with the help of his Empress, Haggar. He strives for even greater power, crumbles under himself everything that meets in his way. Races, planets, his own kind, his own son.

I must say, in the story itself, The Emperor literally means a meeting with Zarkon and a battle with him.

At the same time, we have Lotor, who’s partly an archetype of the Emperor, but not completely. He has both negative traits of this archetype and positive ones. And this is far from the only part that makes up his character. We’ll talk about this later.

5. The Hierophant.

This card means a lot. Both a spiritual teacher, and connection with religions, and traditional actions, and any organizations, all sorts of serious things.

One way or another, in the plot this card is displayed as the beginning of the diplomatic activity of the paladins, all their communication with other races.

You can add the Blades of Marmora to The Hierophant, because they’re an organization that’s very difficult to get into, it’s devoted to underground activities and is associated with information - that is, with knowledge.

Equally important are the negative traits of The Hierophant, which also find a response in the plot. The purity of faith, party, teaching, blood, race - this is its professional headache. Its worst trait is complacency, intolerance and exceptional conviction of its own righteousness.

Lynching, the search for enemies of the people, the fight against infidels, the witch hunt, the tribunal, the auto da-fe – this is its gloomy bottom or black peak. Actually, this we definitely meet in the plot, and more than once. From the side of Allura. From the paladins. From the liberated races. This topic we’ll see many more times.

Another thing is that not everyone is ready to poke The Hierophant into its failures.

6. The Lovers

The card, despite its name, which could warm a shipper’s heart, is not about love. Well, it can be about love, but not in this case.

It may mean a situation of choice, not necessarily related to love. Then it means that one way or another we’ll have to make a decision, decisively and irrevocably, without leaving any loopholes for ourselves and taking on certain obligations. The Lovers depict a bold decision made by your heart. This is an internal knowledge of what is good and what is bad for you personally, which can’t be faked or deceived. You can’t listen to it, you can pretend that you don’t hear and don’t know it, you can act in defiance, but its tone doesn’t change.

In fact, the entire Keith’s story arc goes under this card. And the point is not in his possible romantic relationship.

The fact is that from the very moment he found out that he was a half-Galra, from the moment he began to do something with the Blades... a choice began to arise in front of him.

To take a step towards what really attracts him – the Blades, life with the Galra, inner freedom...

Or to stay with the paladins, in a place that he doesn’t like, but which he «must» take. As we all remember, he made a choice by the heart. He followed the call to work with the Blades.

Choices often confront heroes during narration. But these choices aren’t always truly right.

7. The Chariot

This card is a movement, it’s a pure impulse. At the same time, it’s control over one’s life, a clear understanding of what one wants and what needs to be achieved. Also, various journeys and adventures pass through it.

In fact, under The Chariot card, Lotor and his actions pass in many ways. Because he knows what he needs to do, he knows what he wants, and achieves this in all possible ways. He drives his chariot confidently, rarely doubts anything, and at first he succeeds a lot.

However, the farther the plot, the more we see that The Chariot doesn’t always go in the right direction and sometimes Lotor still loses control over it. This happens when it’s revealed that he built ships secretly from Zarkon. In general, very quickly he passes from a state of triumph and regular victories to a state where it’s difficult to do anything and he’s forced to rush to wherever his eyes look.

In part, The Chariot is also part of the character of Lotor, who’s used to keeping everything under control. At the same time, he’s not just a harsh Emperor, he’s an inspirer, he’s a traveler who never stays in one place and is always open to something new.

On the part of the paladins, The Chariot is their whole journey. Their entire movement is largely chaotic, albeit with an understanding of what needs to be done. They don’t always hold control, and then it carries them away - it carries them into serious, very serious problems.

8. Justice

It’s a very important card. It connects the relationship between action and consequences, taking responsibility for their actions, comprehending social laws, and the ability to make informed decisions. In other words, everything related to karma and responsibility is here.

And this same card is really important for the plot, for the development of the paladins. Because they often acted without thinking about the consequences, relying only on spontaneous, impulsive impulses. There are a lot of such examples, they go through the whole plot, but let's take a few.

The first meeting of Lotor at the paladins took place under the direction of Keith, and he certainly doesn’t realize the lesson of Justice. He’s not used to following the rules, he’s not used to commanding, and all his actions will shout at them in the future - Lotor throws their Lions in all directions like kittens. If he would like to - he would easily kill them.

In many ways, Lotor’s interaction with the paladins goes under the flag of Justice. More precisely, its non-compliance.

The paladins are going to give the prince into the hands of Zarkon – and immediately receive the consequences of their incorrect decision, that is, fraud and further problems.

But the most important thing that our heroes do, which very strongly comes around to them in the future, happens in S6. On the part of Allura, this is a belief in the words of Romelle and an instant decision to punish Lotor, on the part of the paladins – it’s the decision to fight Lotor. One way or another, in the future, their wrong actions will be scourged by the Earth, which, due to their loss, will be captured. The empire is fragmented due to the disappearance of Lotor – and these are also serious consequences.

It’s difficult to say whether the characters learned a lesson in what Justice provides. They at least tried.

And you probably would have understood the whole point if... yes, yes, right, if not for the broken S8.

We’ll return to this topic. Because the amendments that were made to the plot... contributed to its complete destruction.

9. The Hermit

A card of self-development, immersion in oneself and the study of one’s own abilities. The card is also associated with receiving magic gifts that will help the hero fulfill his mission.

One way or another, it’s this card that suits Allura.

She not only differs from the others; the further in the plot, the more distant she is from the others, and the more she plunges into self-knowledge to understand what exactly happens to her, who she is and what she needs – not for everyone around, but for herself.

A gift comes to her through Oriande, when she comprehends her essence in many ways. Then, a «teacher» comes to the rescue – in this case, more likely a «guide», who is Lotor. He could instruct her and help her get to the state of the Empress, which she needed so much. But the story didn’t complete the training of Allura. The Hermit’s path hasn’t been completed. And this is another fail of the changed plot.

Also, this card suits Keith. His choice has already been mentioned earlier, but one way or another, he also went through internal growth in order to find his real self. His Galran self.

Also, the path of the Haggar-Honevra is important. Because she passes through The Hermit at a time when she gradually regains her memories and herself. She again remembers herself, her personality, her son. And she also receives gifts having passed through Oriande.

The development path goes absolutely for all characters. I described only those that have a serious impact on the plot.

10. Wheel of Fortune

I like this card. It carries the inevitability of development, random events, it helps to accept oneself, and also reminds us that everything will end one way or another. That’s why you need to continue to move on and seize the moment. But the most important thing is fate and events, especially influencing what’s happening.

In fact, the most significant events in the plot take place along the Wheel of Fortune. This is the victory of the paladins over Zarkon, then – the battle of Lotor with Zarkon and his victory over him, the rise of Lotor as emperor, the disappearance of Lotor and the capture of the Earth. And also other events... that were supposed to be, but didn’t happen. For example, the return of Lotor. The salvation of the universe is real, not what was provided in the series. One way or another... development stopped and sticks began to be inserted into the wheel.

But its influence doesn’t become smaller.

11. Strength

This card depicts reconciliation and integration of opposites within the hero: male and female, mind and emotions, instincts and rational principles, consciousness and the unconscious.

This card follows all the way of Keith. His decision to be with the Blades, the fact that in the end he became a better leader than he was at first. Because he was reconciled with himself. Because he found strength in himself.

This is also the path of Allura. Its very important part, which was supposed to be decisive. This is the alliance of Allura and Lotor. The way they would balance each other, complementing, improving, not by force, but with the help of soft influence. Strength is never about physical strength. This is primarily strength of mind and gentleness at the same time. The ability to tame the beast, which doesn’t allow to move on.

This was clearly an important development in the fate of Lotor. Because he contains the Galran teaching, their eternal «victory or death» is fixed in his mind. And that bothers him. This doesn’t allow him to fully reveal. In the future, he would surely be able to come to a harmony of the Altean and Galran principles in himself. There was no opportunity. This opportunity has been missed.

Allura also had to cope with her aggressiveness and intolerance, to come to a merger of the two parts. Well. Partly she did it. But because of all the same interference in the story – not to the end. Development hasn’t been fully completed. She didn’t come to harmony in her soul.

12. The Hanged Man

Important card. Special card. It carries a loss of meaning and purpose of the path, awareness of hopelessness in the face of future death, readiness for self-sacrifice. Everything connected with the voluntary sacrifice goes through this card.

Well, the plot has everything connected with it.

If the Galra go under The Emperor’s card, then under The Hanged Man’s one there’s the entire Altean race. In the plot, they’re in a suspended position – in a colony, with the danger that they’ll be found and destroyed, as well as with great willingness to sacrifice their lives for the good of society. Voluntary sacrifice is what they do all the time. Since there’s every reason to believe that the Alteans readily went to possible death when Lotor called for them, this fits even more precisely into the concept of The Hanged Man.

Ulaz, who literally sacrificed his life to help the paladins, also suits here.

The same card suits Allura. And also – Honerva. Not surprising, given that they’re both Alteans. Their sacrifice at the end is a sacrifice for salvation.

Unnecessary and stupid sacrifice, but still we have what we have.

13. Death

Despite the creepy name, this card doesn’t carry a real negative. Death is a card of transformation.

Although it can mean literal death, which is happening all the time in the series. The death of an almost entire race of Alteans. Permanent deaths of the Galra’s victims and the Galra themselves.

But much more important are the «death» of Lotor, who stayed in the Rift, and the immediately subsequent «death» of Allura, who hasn’t died yet, but she’s undergoing a serious transformation during her lifetime. She literally dies in her soul, being on Earth. It’s something like a limb for her, where she wanders, trying to understand what’s happening.

14. Temperance

In general, this card depicts inner harmony. And it always goes after the Death card. When you go through perdition in order to find the radiance of the soul and happiness.

One way or another, the story arc of Allura continues under this card, who was supposed to come to harmony on Earth, figure out herself, realize where she was wrong and so on. This card differs from The Hermit: it occurs precisely after the advent of trouble and a certain depression.

According to this card, life comes after death. We saw this at the end of S8, when Allura sacrificed herself. That there’s afterlife for her. However, in a normal plot this is not the end.

This is just the beginning.

15. The Devil

This card carries a meeting with internal demons, suppressed by desires, as well as with an antagonist who acts as the external carrier of the Shadow of the Hero.

One way or another, Lotor’s life goes under this card. His Shadow is always in front of him - this is Zarkon. At first, he doesn’t fight with him, but tries to reconcile, what we see in his childhood and youth, but not all demons are subject to taming, and Lotor quickly realizes that it’s impossible to reconcile with him. Rather, it can be possible... but he doesn’t want this.

So our prince begins the battle with his father, with his Devil, whose echoes are also found in himself – in the form of a severe Galra upbringing. Lotor isn’t a bad person, he goes as far as possible from what his father did, but one way or another, the dark sides in him manifest themselves from time to time. Take, for example, his actions after the battle with Throk, when the exile to the most distant post was a manifestation of mercy.

In any case, the most important meeting of Lotor and his Shadow occurs when he encounters his father and defeats him. An important detail happens at that moment. The sun is falling on his face – which further confirms this way out of darkness to the light that he committed.

Each character has its dark sides. Pidge has endless egoism, she always puts herself and her family in the first place, and in the series there was no necessary progress further, she didn’t outgrow it and remained together with her demons.

Keith is too hot-tempered, his hasty decisions ruin a lot, and he only partially moved away from this to the very end, but... not completely. Perhaps it’s impossible, after all, it’s part of his character.

The dark side of Allura is her bias, her post-traumatic xenophobia... and also – a hot temper and impulsivity. Take, for example, how she pilots her Lion and how she fights. Over time, she becomes more tolerant, but still doesn’t get a full development, and her darkness remains with her, continuing to poison her life.

Again, everyone has negative aspects, but it doesn’t make sense to describe it for a long time, everyone understands everything.

16. The Tower

My most unlikable card, but very important one.

The Tower is the collapse of obsolete foundations and plans, the resolution of an obsolete value system.

The first moment, perhaps, is the story about Zarkon in the past. This has already destroyed past guesses, thoughts and the belief that he’s actually «pure evil».

Next is Zarkon's hunt for Lotor.

Then comes the betrayal, when the generals betray Lotor and thereby destroy the world familiar to him.

Next event is Allura discovering that Lotor is half Altean. This becomes the collapse of the past plan of thoughts for her. And now everything is moving into a new direction.

And most importantly... there are even three events in a row: this is Romelle's story, the battle with Lotor and the understanding that Shiro had been a clone for a long time.

In general, there’s nothing to say. Some events of this card led to a successful resolution. And some destroyed it all. That's why it’s The Tower.

It leaves nothing behind.

17. The Star

...well, something still remains, and that’s good.

The Star card is hope in its purest form. These are dreams and fantasies, a certain fragility, which may eventually manifest in life, or may not appear. It exists and doesn’t exist at the same time.

Hope really shines on the paladins throughout the seasons. Moreover, it shines both to Lotor and Honerva.

Everyone has different hopes and dreams, but one way or another, everyone has the belief that they will succeed in doing what they want.

To save the universe. To find a safe and convenient source of quintessence. To get the son back.

Not all hopes are justified.

But all the characters continue to believe.

It also describes the events after S6. When everything around gives hope. The hope that Lotor will return to the story.

Again... unfortunately, not all hopes are justified. Sometimes they’re destroyed by someone else's intervention.

18. The Moon

And again, we have a mystery card. But it’s much deeper, it’s the mystery hidden so far that only few could reach. Secrets of The High Priestess are always revealed, but secrets of The Moon – almost never.

Also, this card is responsible for fears and wandering in captivity of illusions. And for deceit too, which is important.

This card mainly refers to the situation with Lotor and the colony. This is a dangerous secret that shouldn’t have surfaced, which created a huge amount of fears – in just a few seconds – and destroyed everything. But much more important is that under this card goes... Romelle. A dark horse, in the words of which there are too many suspicious omissions, and even more in her behavior. A snake hiding under a pretty appearance, pretending to be a victim and a fool. She suits The Moon. And now her secret would have been revealed in the future... if not for the changes in the plot.

19. The Sun

This card, in fact, only partially appears in the story, as well as subsequent ones. Rather, it’s present, but... it’s expressed incorrectly. Because of all the same changes.

The Sun is the first card of rebirth. And also it means happiness, harmony, the beginning of the end of the path and the final victory.

One way or another, it was The Sun that had to fully manifest itself in the last season.

We have already seen its power – when Allura brought Lance back to life. In the same way, she could bring Lotor back to life, which is exactly what the plot was supposed to happen. Reunion.

And next comes…

20. Judgment

Oh, what a beautiful card, twofold and amazing! How much was to happen in Voltron!

This card means healing, transformation, removal of all masks. It continues the theme of The Sun, being its final chord. Masks are dropped, and all things open in their true light.

At the end of the story, or rather, closer to its end, Romelle was to be exposed, and the return of Lotor took place, and the discovery of the true goals of Honerva.

But as a result, we have a completely dead Lotor – which, however, also fits into the concept of Judgment, which also means ultimate death. But given all the past signs – the card wasn’t fully used. What was about to happen didn’t happend. 21. The World The last card completing the Hero’s Jounrey. Homecoming. The completion of the plot. The end of all, achieving goals.We all know how VLD ended. The «happy ending», or rather, what was disguised as it, can only be called an inverted World.The storylines didn’t reach the end. The story arcs of the characters weren’t finished.The Hero’s Journey wasn’t completed. It was rudely interrupted.As if there was one straight line at the end of which someone drew a bunch of strange lines.The World doesn’t mean a complete end. It symbolizes the beginning of a new story. Each of the characters went in different directions, each with their own path.If they all went through the journey that was laid down in this story, as in all other stories like this, they would be really happy. A new era would come for them. A new life.But the broken plot left them with the severity of the past. The plot threw them, spat out, like unnecessary details.The plot grind the lives and arcs of Lotor, Allura, Lance and Shiro. It changed the lives of Pidge, Hunk and Keith in the negative direction.Everything that happened was wrong.Because the Hero's Journey is always the same.Only the heroes themselves differ... and the details.And this journey didn’t reach the end. Real development slowed down somewhere.So, this story isn’t complete. What we’re shown is an unfinished stub.We still love this story. Even as it is.But actually... we all love this story as it should have been. So, we went through the Hero's Journey through the 22 Major Tarot And remember, cards exist not only for divination.Cards are a unique system for exploring the world, psychology and much more. 

[heauxplesslydevoted]

Heart to Heart

Missing scene from the latest chapter of The Nanny Affair. My MC comforts Sofia after being publicly embarrassed by her father. I hated that scene, and I hate that Sofia is such a one dimensional character. 

Background MC (Luna Stafford) x Sam Dalton, but only if you tilt your head and squint.

Tags: @choices-lurker @paulfwesley @zodiacsign1 @thatysn @ermidc @badchoicesposts @senseofduties @canknot @drakewalker04

~v~

Luna can’t enjoy the fact that she’s drinking her salary in fancy champagne, enjoying a rooftop dinner with some of the richest people in the tri-state area. Any other day, this would be a dream come true, but in reality, she’s stuck in a nightmare.

For the past two hours, they’ve been forced to listen to Paolo make snide remarks on everything under the sun from her nannying skills to Sofia’s business acumen. Luna is not a fan of Paolo Russo. He seems like a miserable, stuffy old man whose only joy in life comes from whining and looking down on other people.

She casts a quick glance at Sam. The always poised and out together man looks as bored as she feels. His elbows are on the table, a finger lazily tracing the rim of his champagne flute. Gone are the manners and the fine dining etiquette that’s been drilled into him since infancy.

He looks up, sneaking a glance at her. An easy grin adorns his features as they lock eyes, and she quickly looks away, heat blooming on the apples of her cheeks. It’s rare that Sam is so unapologetic in his flirting with her, especially in the presence of his kids. 

The sound of a knife hitting the stem of a champagne flute is all it takes to pull Luna out of her thoughts. Paolo is standing at the head of the table, waiting on everyone to watch him with rapt attention.

He clears his throat obnoxiously, “Ahem. Thank you all for coming to congratulate my beautiful daughter and her future husband on their upcoming nuptials.”

Out of the corner of her eye, Luna sees Sofia sit up a bit straighter, eagerly awaiting the praise she’s sure her father is going to heap onto her.

“Sofia has been run ragged at Russo Industries for far too long,” Paolo continues. “Now she can finally fulfill her purpose to become a wife and mother. After all, a woman in a position of power in the business world is like an unstable explosive, especially around that time of the month.” The older man turns toward Sam, hoping to get a co-sign on his speech. “Right, Sam?”

Luna clenches her fist tightly underneath the table. She can’t believe the unmitigated fall that his man has. “Did he really just say that?”

Sam turns to her with a mournful expression. “Unfortunately.”

Luna isn’t the only one at the table embarrassed by Paolo’s speech. Sam’s mother Vivian leans over to her husband, whispering harshly. “Mason honey, I thought you talked to him about this.”

“I tried, but you know how it goes with Paolo.”

Luna balks at the scene unfolding in front of her. So they all just let Paolo get away with talking like this? It’s just talk, that they all chalk up to Paolo just being Paolo?

Paolo, the arrogant man, is far too caught up in his own spiel to notice that they’re all openly horrified. He just keeps going. “...A family disarms the bomb! That’s why it’s called a biological clock.”

Luna wants to scream. She wants to hit something. She wants to do anything else but listen to this man continue on with his horribly misinformed and misogynistic speech.

“Finally we’re getting to the good stuff.”

“I predict a Sofia meltdown in three...two…”

The countdown doesn’t have to finish as Sofia all but slams her champagne flute down on the table. The noise startles Luna and she flinches slightly.

“I’ve heard this speech before. I don’t need to hear it again.”

Sofia scrambles, attempting to gather her belongings. Luna notices that her hands are slightly trembling and her eyes are glossy, tears threatening to spill.

Before she can stop herself, she’s opening her mouth, “Actually Paolo, men and women have the same brains. Neurologists have been searching for differences for years, but nothing ever turns up. And this society makes girls lesser than men, which is a gross assumption that’s pushed by men like you.”

The admonishment causes a faint blush to appear at Paolo’s neck. “And what does that have to do with my daughter’s role at Russo Industries?”

Luna shrugs. “Even I can tell she would make a great CEO. In fact, I bet you’ve already seen gains under her management.”

“My daughter’s abilities aren’t in question. It’s a matter of right and wrong. Women belong at home. It’s why you became a nanny, right?”

“Paolo, you are way out of line,” Sam says, his voice taking on an uncharacteristically gruff tone. “I won’t have you speaking to Luna like that.”

Out of the corner of her eye, Luna sees Sofia rush off, heading back into the country club, not sticking around for any more of the conversation.

“It’s fine, Sam,” Luna says. The last thing she wants to do is cause a confrontation. It’d raise too many questions. Why is Sam so quick to defend the nanny and not his own fiancée? “This conversation is done anyway.”

Pushing her seat back, Luna throws her napkin on the table and gets up, leaving behind an awkwardly silent dinner party.

Sofia is a very fast walker, but Luna manages to keep a decent pace behind her, her platinum blonde hair making her an easy target to follow. The older woman heads to the restroom, angrily pushing open the door. Luna weaves through patrons of the club and various waiters carrying trays until she reaches the bathroom as well.

Luna is instantly swept up in just how fancy this restroom is. The lighting is dim, it smells like eucalyptus and mint, there’s soft music playing, and she’s pretty sure the faucets are made of real gold.

It isn’t until she hears a sniffle coming from one of the stalls that she is reminded of the reason she entered the restroom in the first place. Taking a peek under the stall, she sees Sofia’s signature Louboutin heels.

“Sofia, I know you’re in there.”

“Go away,” Sofia orders. Her tone doesn’t have its usual bite or chill. Luna frowns at how small she sounds. “I don’t need you here to coddle me.”

“I can’t do that. My conscience won’t let me leave a sad woman crying in the restroom alone.”

“I’m not crying!”

“Sure you’re not. But my point remains, I’m not leaving until you talk to me.”

A minute ticks by and Luna is met with silence. Sofia is just as stubborn as she anticipated, maybe even more so.

She leans against the marble countertop, careful to not lean against any wet spots. “If anyone knows how you feel, it would be me.”

More silence.

“I’m a black woman in STEM,” Luna continues, not waiting for a response. “I don’t know what it’s like in the business world, but if I got a dime for every time a man, and sometimes other women, told me to not pursue chemistry, I’d probably be able to afford your shoes.”

“Really?”

Luna smiles to herself. Sofia actually responded to her! She’s making progress! “Really. I was told to focus on nursing or a social science, like sociology or anthropology by multiple teachers, classmates and counselors. Not saying there’s anything wrong with those fields, I think they’re great, but that wasn’t the path for me. I’ve always loved chemistry. I’ve had the periodic table memorized since I was in 3rd grade. Thankfully I have parents that support my passion, because everyone isn’t so lucky.”

Sofia scoffs. “Got that right. I got my BA from Yale, I graduated summa cum laude and I went to Wharton for grad school, but let my dad tell it, I simply wasted 6 years and half a million dollars in tuition costs. Those degrees mean nothing to him because he’s the stereotypical, conservative and traditional Italian man. I’m not the correct sex or gender for him. In a perfect world, I’d be the perfect song but instead, I’m his fussy daughter. I’m not supposed to do anything other than get pregnant and cook, and how dare I want anything else out of life.”

“I say this with the utmost respect, but your father is a sexist jerk,” Luna deadpans. “You can yell at me for saying it, but I don’t regret it. And I’m shocked Russo Industries is still standing because I can only imagine the HR complaints and harassment lawsuits against your father over the years.”

“There’s no need to apologize because it’s the truth. My father doesn’t respect me. He doesn’t respect women at all. My mother was never allowed to have an opinion, and mine isn’t all that valued either.”

“I thought taking the initiative and getting engaged to Sam would make him respect me,” Sofia adds. “I wanted to do this in order to prove to him that I’m worthy. I thought he’d see that I’m a go-getter, and I’m ambitious, and I want the Russo family to thrive, but he doesn’t care about the business aspect of the merger like I do. He’s just glad I found a rich husband.”

Another bout of silence falls between the two women, but this time it’s not as awkward as before. it’s almost peaceful. Luna still hears the occasional sniffle, but she doesn’t call any attention to it. Crying is too vulnerable for Sofia to be open about.

“Besides, I don’t know if things will even pan out the way I want them to,” Sofia says. “The boys aren’t that fond of me, and Sam is just so...cold. I’m trying to make this a decent transition, and I’m trying to find out where I fit in that family dynamic, but it’s not working. He didn’t want me around for his birthday, he doesn’t respect my opinion on how to raise Mickey and Mason. More times than not, it feels like he’s counting down the minutes until he has to be in my presence anymore.” The stall door opens up and Sofia steps out. Her eyes are bloodshot and her nose is red and raw. Luna averts her gaze quickly, not wanting to draw too much attention to it.

“I don’t even know if this is worth it anymore. I’m exhausted, and I’m trying to sustain a relationship all by myself. Sam can barely sustain a conversation with me, and my dad isn’t impressed, so what’s the point? What am I doing this all for?”

Luna frowns. Sofia has always seemed so...bold and intimidating, like nothing ever rattled her. But looking underneath the perfectly put together surface, Sofia is just a woman trying to fight and claw for every inch of success, despite the lack of a support system.

“I meant what I said earlier,” Luna says. “I think you’re smart, and I think you’d make an excellent CEO of Russo Industries. And I don’t think you need Sam at your side to do so.”

That shocks Sofia. Her eyebrows shoot up past her hairline at the compliment. “You really think so? You have that much faith in me?”

Luna doesn’t know if she’s giving Sofia this advice because she truly believes in it, or if a selfish part of her wants the other woman to leave Sam alone, so they can finally be together. Her stomach twists uncomfortably at the thought, full of guilt. Does this count as manipulation?

She swallows thickly, pushing down whatever guilt is trying to bubble to the surface and nods. “I do. You don’t need a man to be successful and fulfilled. You don’t need your dad’s approval. And you don’t need to feed into the bullshit cycle of misogyny that your dad perpetuates.”

Sofia walks over to the sink and turns the faucet. After she splashes cool water on her face, she turns back to Luna. “Thank you, I guess. No one has ever talked to my dad the way you did, especially not in defense of me. And thank you for coming in here.”

“You’re welcome. Even the rich and powerful Sofia Russos of the world need 5 minutes to vent and cry.”

“Never mention to anyone that you’ve seen me like this,” Sofia orders sharply. No one, especially people in New York high society, can know that the ice queen herself shows emotion. 

“What happens in the ladies’ room, stays in the ladies’ room. Scout’s honor.”

“Good.” Sofia sighs and straightens herself up. Luna watches the cool facade slip back into place as Sofia fixes her makeup and runs a brush through her hair. Sofia is back to being the poised, elegant woman everyone knows.

Once she’s done, she straightens out her clothes and heads to the door. Hesitating, Sofia lingers by the door. She turns back to Luna, her eyes softer than the younger woman has ever seen them. “You know what? Maybe I misjudged you. You aren’t as bad as I originally thought.”

A soft smile tugs on the corner of Luna’s mouth. “That’s high praise coming from you. I’ll take it.”

Without another word, Sofia sweeps out of the restroom, leaving Luna all alone, the sound of her heels clicking against the floors now an echo. With the presence of the other woman no longer stifling her, Luna lets out a breath she didn’t even realize she was holding in.

She didn’t know what to expect coming in here to comfort Sofia, but now everything feels much more complicated.

[yanderedbh-moved]

The Yanderes + Fluff Scenarios

The third installment of this little series, I guess I have now of the yanderes in typical fanfiction tropes. 

Smut

H/C

Connor

While it may be tricky for him to grasp the concept of personal hobbies (as in performing tasks with no real tangible pay off or goal in mind.) He experiences a very wholesome and heartwarming sense of pride from watching you doing what you love. In your element and feeling so free.

Connor experiencing the charming sense of alarm one typically feels when fostering a crush for another. Worrying if you secretly knew but weren’t telling him, would you lead him on, were you personally seeing someone else right now, etc.

Though it might seem small, Connor enjoys leaving the house every now and then to just get a pleasant walk in to see his home city while not on the clock. It’s a considerably understated freedom the android only learned to appreciate once he was granted the choice to do so himself.

Markus

It’s pretty commonly accepted at this point Markus loves reading, for so many reasons. For one thing, it reminds him of his home and of his father figure who possessed a vast array of different books of great diversity. As well as the pure pleasure of enjoying a little alone time away from the noise of the outside world.

In a relationship, Markus would be an excellent partner when it comes to empowerment! He would absolutely want to teach you different ways to defend yourself and would want to ensure you had the skills and know-how to keep yourself safe out there.

Also isn’t above using the fact he’s the leader of Jericho to his advantage. As in, if he knows you’re having issues with someone in your life, and it’s causing you to feel unsafe and on edge, he would ensure this person knew just who they were messing with, along with sending the message to back off.

Kara

Once the two of you finally manage to find a stable life for yourselves, and Alice Kara would finally receive the chance for fun, inconsequential domestic life, she never had the opportunity to live out before.

Kara really enjoys having a human partner far more than she ever expected to! For so many reasons, but a personal favorite of hers is keeping you company in the final few moments before you fall asleep. It’s just the two of you, and you’re mind’s practically shut off, and she really enjoys the way you so completely relax into her.

Alice is shown to enjoy drawing and art, so you can imagine once she actually lives in a comfortable, stable environment, she feels much more comfortable expressing herself. Kara loves to keep her child’s drawing as keepsakes and is something of a hoarder when it comes to pictures Alice draws of the three of you.

Hank

It’s tricky at the start, but you do your best to get Hank out of the house more. To try and urge him to move on, to fall back in love with life, promising him you’ll be by his side every step of the way.

Furthermore, when you actually do get around to moving in with Hank, there’s a kind of an inexpressible breath of life he feels. Like for the first time in so long, this place actually feels like a home again, and not just where he lives.

Mushy, ultra-sweet romance isn’t precisely Hank’s style, but he would still find other little ways to make you feel loved. He’s more the one to use endearing sarcasm or an affectionate nickname to express his real emotions.

Luther

Imagine having to try and lift yourself all the way up to your tiptoes to get a kiss on the cheek from him. While he could always just lean down and help you out, he thinks it’s kind of cute to watch you try so hard.

He likes to be in bed with you, to make you feel close and held while you’re getting your rest. While physically, he may not need the sleep, keeping you close, wishing this moment won’t ever end is profoundly therapeutic for Luther.

North

Small acts of kindness and taking care of North in little ways may not feel like much to the outside observer, however, considering she’s never received treatment so gentle and sweet from anyone else in her life? Yeah, it’s more than enough to leave her feeling beyond blessed.

Imagine an intense moment with North. The two of you are working in a group, and the stress of it all is rising. She’s doing her best to keep composure, but she slips up and accidentally refers to you by a silly nickname she gave you, and you can’t help but crack up a little bit, despite the situation.

When it comes to dating North, it’s essential to have a bit of a thick skin. When she first begins to develop feelings for you, she might feel overwhelmed and confused by her own emotions and say something hurtful to try and keep you at a distance. Later on though, when she feels more comfortable opening up to you, North would definitely apologize for this and regret this mistake severely.

Simon

So much long-distance pining! About a fifty-fifty split between Simon being an absolute mess of emotions, along with him wondering how in the world he’s ever going to muster up the courage to confess to you.

It’s pretty critical not to rush him or anything here. At the best of times, Simon can be a bit stressed out, and maybe a little high strung. Even though he genuinely cares about you, it’s important to respect his space and understand that he needs a little patience on your end.

(This is debatable, but I think it adds up.) Simon is the android with maybe the most extended history with humans, and because of that has gathered a great deal of information via observation. He knows how to treat humans gently and is a much better kisser than he would let on.

Josh

In his darker, more pessimistic moments, there are times when Josh wonders if there’s really any hope for a future in which humans and androids live together in peace. In times like this, he really needs you as the little positive voice he can relly on to assure him there’s still hope and time to find peace and love between androids and humans.

Now that androids are granted far more space to exist freely of their own volition Josh rather enjoys taking you out on a quiet little one on one date. It’s nice to see the city how it was meant to be seen, and there’s no one he would rather share this with than you.

Much like his leader, when Josh has the free time to spend, Josh is something of a bookworm. However, for him, it’s much more a chance to explore a new hobby he’s no experience with, rather than to re-capture memories of the past. (Also he has a soft spot for romance novels, fight me.)

Kamski

(This one is up for debate, but...) Kamski gives off the vibes of someone who could kill at chess. It could be a fun little game between the two of you, to see if one day you could beat him, but he’s been playing since he was a child, so chances are slim, to say the least.

He’s productive and innovative to a fault, and he would really relly on you to look out for him and his health. Or, in other words, to drag him to bed and keep him from completely wrecking his sleep schedule in the name of progress.

Even though it’s rather common for him to leave the house in the name of giving an interview, a speech or a lecture hall, or something of the sort, Kamski would understand if you were the kind of person to prefer to stay home, or otherwise out of the spotlight.

Chloe

One thing which never fails to make Chloe feel better is playing with your hair, on the condition you do the same with her later. Also, bonus points if you agree to take pictures with her afterward.

She’s beyond sensitive to others' emotions, especially to yours, and there’s just something about your smile and your laugh, which sticks with her. It’s infectious to her, and she can’t get enough.

If she finds you’ve fallen asleep somewhere, Chloe really loves to just curl up and sleep next to you like a cat.

Gavin

He’s really the one to pretend to fall asleep if the two of you were cuddling either in bed or on the couch because he loves whenever you tuck him in and kiss his head goodnight. It’s something he likely never received growing up, and it means a lot to him to get that now.

The first time you ever see him all cleaned up and in beautiful clothes is more than a little shocking to you, and it’s difficult not to stare upon seeing him actually putting forth and effort.

Ralph

It doesn’t matter if you’ve only been gone for a couple hours, or for the entire day, when you come back, Ralph is always there to greet you at the door, ready to welcome you back, with the ecstatic energy of a puppy.

A quiet, but deeply profound moment Ralph has when he realizes he doesn’t actually want to live all alone, and that he genuinely finds happiness sharing his space with a human. There’s more to life than hiding.

You assure him that you think he looks exactly perfect just the way he is. There’s no need for him to try and “fix” the way he looks, and in your eyes, there’s no reason for him to feel lesser, or inadequate in any way.

Daniel

Embracing shamelessly “childish” activities with him. Things like decorating the house for holidays, cleaning games, arts and crafts, that sort of thing. It might appear silly on the surface, but to Daniel, it’s some of the few happy memories he has of his old life.

When Daniel decides to commit to a serious, loving relationship with you, Daniel is making a legitimate commitment here. He is actively choosing to embrace his emotions, and not to try and run away from them,

At his worst, Daniel can be very high strung and impulsive, so you must know plenty of de-stress activities to keep him under control.

Nines

Nines absolutely struggle with the initial symptoms of lovesickness. He grapples with worrying if you’ll ever love him back, or worse, that you wouldn’t even consider loving something which was designed to serve a strictly utilitarian purpose.

To his surprise, there’s a little bit of satisfaction Nines feels upon experiencing things like longing and tenderness. There is something to be said for experiencing these abstract emotions in any regard, considering how contrary to his programming they are.

Nines possesses a very strong memory and is one of the best you’ll ever meet. Those two factors together result in an android who knows basically everyone’s business, and who is very difficult to keep secrets from.

Buy Me a Ko-Fi // Requests are Open

[newproletarians]

new proletarians

Alright, so I’m feeling a few things. I’m angry and confused at the world and my place in it, and I don’t want to lose sight of my heart. The reason that’s even on the table is that I feel—in a very real, day-to-day sense—the urge to just let it callous over with grey boogers, or whatever callouses over the hearts of Squidwards everywhere. Regular old life can do that to a devastating degree, but so can the usual suspects—things like real trauma and tragedy. I’d like to say I’ve experienced a little of both at this point in my young life, but I’m still fighting the calcification of my heart. Let’s hope that in just throwing my brain at the proverbial wall, some things stick that are worth sticking. Maybe my clarity can also be yours, reader. Maybe we can snuggle up with ourselves tonight, content that we know what the fuck is going on in the world, and smugly abstain from that which our friends could never imagine abstaining from, and which we’ve known we’ve needed to abstain from for decades. Whatever. It’s wordy. It’s a fucking blog, future me. They’re supposed to contain words. Also, maybe, if I’m writing a blog where the over 50% of the audience is myself, writing it is supposed to feel at least a little similar to masturbating.

Where to begin? Well, let’s start with this: I am a college-educated youth who attended what’s commonly referred to as the best public university in the world. I received a rolled up piece of paper symbolizing a degree on a stage with other students and professors a year and a half ago. So it’s recent. And right off the bat, in my young adulthood, I have a chip on my shoulder, having that big qualifier of “public.” I went to the world’s fanciest college... for the proletariat. What does that mean? For me, this brings to mind a lot of issues having to do with the distribution of wealth in the United States, in addition to what the hell is going on economically here and in the world—but that’s something to get into later. The more pressing issue is what the hell the role of a college-educated young person is today. DFW pretty succinctly laid out an idea of what that could be in his famous address. His point was basically that college (specifically, a liberal arts education) gives you the critical thinking skills necessary to be able to get through life under capitalism (or whatever you want to call the current regime) without going crazy. I think we can do better than that. Also, fuck it, I’m giving myself permission to be temporarily pissed off, because fuck that, dude. I know that rage isn’t always an indicator of fruitful conversation, but I gotta let some steam out somewhere. I’m sure that it’ll only lead to me being better down the line. God—I am pissed. About how we’re deciding to go about talking through issues we’re having as a society (on Twitter, but also in comments sections and in NY Times articles). I have so much anger, I’m just now realizing, and I need to process it without stupidly burning myself out on it. It’s a subject for later, and not what we’re talking about right now. Right now, we’re talking about the role of the college-educated youth today. I think we’re getting somewhere, too. I don’t think the role of the college-educated youth in today’s scenario is to correct their friends and families, nor is it to Tweet about how embarrassing, vulgar, or otherwise horrible stupid people are—however embarrassing, vulgar, or otherwise horrible they may be. The role, to me, has to do with learning this stuff. Learning about systems of power, systems of abuse (many of which hum merrily along in universities—looking at you, Searl. [My anger, you guide me, but you also lead me astray]).Staying ON POINT. The way it has to do with these things is that today’s C.E.Y. needs to notice them, understand them, then DO something about them. There are, for instance, things that we learn about privilege and prejudice in university that we may be tempted to hurl at our elders back home as insults. Our jobs, as young students, are to be sexy, fashionable, charismatic stewards of the new age. Instead of yelling at our parents about being racist, we should, say, intervene in a subtle way that guides rather than punishes. That preserves trust and connection in relationships while simultaneously doing our best to right centuries-old wrongs. But this is about so much more than that. Our role is about how we conduct ourselves as the nations intelligentsia. But that’s a question. I’m not answering it here, try as I might. I still don’t know how I feel about it. It stretches into all corners of life, this role. For instance, into several things in my life I’m mad about.

For instance, I kind of hate my closest loved ones. Oops. That’s where I’m at. Am I supposed to ignore these feelings? They’re there, they’ve been there, and if I know anything about our brains, it’s that feelings shouldn’t be ignored. That’s what dumb ass patriarchs think. The funniest/saddest part of that is that they, said dumb asses, tell themselves that suppressing their feelings is the manly thing to do. It’s honestly just the cowardly thing to do. Men are so afraid of confronting their feelings that they would rather go their entire life wearing a life three sizes too small than mention a thing about it. Anyway. They’re conditioned to feel this way by their surroundings. This—this is a great point that I would love to be a major takeaway here. The thing about being educated is that you’re aware of systems, that systems need to be changed. Fault the people who can change the systems, if anyone, but really, even they are just products of the system. The good thing is that, as a powerless mass of atomized society, we have been created by these systems knowing SOME things that are wrong with it. Now we, the crumbs of dust living in and created by the gargantuan grandfather clock of life, have the sentience necessary to band together and make switch out some gears. Picture a big hand of made of dust, fixing the clock. That’s us. That’s what the role of college educated students is today. But that’s not so much the point of this paragraph, so much is the fact that I kind of hate my closest loved ones—which feels so good to say. My best friends, for instance, are really rough individuals. One is an obvious, obnoxiously insecure, compulsive liar. He’s not super tall and weighs almost 300 pounds. It’s not nice to say this stuff, but the purpose of life isn’t to be nice about everybody all the time in your own head, or on your own anonymous blog. He alienates everyone I bring him around with his bizarre persona. His insecurity is so deep that I shit you not, almost a majority of the interactions I’ve had with him would very reasonably get a “come on,” response from anyone. He has to create little talking points to make his life feel acceptable. He’s one of those people who constantly refers conversations back to their insecurities, and how they feel so secure about them, for this reason and that reason. It’s like, Christ, man. Come on. I feel a lot more ways about this, but I’m a little scared he’ll see this some day. I’m worried he’s going to die young, because he is extremely overweight. His doctor said he’s a few months away from a heart attack/stroke unless he takes immediate action, which it seemed like he was taking initially, but it doesn’t really seem like it anymore. I don’t know. The whole situation feels extremely choked by our inability to just communicate with our fucking words. And yes, I am sounding angry, I’m not actually this angry, but consider these the bubbles from a can of soda that’s been shaken. What will be left is the only-slightly-bubbled soda. That’ll come soon. For now, there are bubbles. New paragraph.

The point that I was trying and failing to get to in the previous paragraph is that I don’t like this guy. He has a lot of great qualities, and he’s certainly not a bad person to have in one’s life—as in, he’ll never cheat on his spouse, and he’ll always go the extra mile for his friends in a certain sense. But I don’t. I wish I could just talk to him about this weird, bizarre, fucking deal breaking shit, but I just can’t. Our communication is choked. I don’t think it’s his fault, though. I think it’s to do with overlapping systems of culture that make it difficult. Maybe. Maybe that’s not the point here, and the real point is just that I feel stuck in that situation. Moving on.

(TW: sexual assault)

Another friend is a fucking bona fide sexual assaulter. He practically got #metoo’d, on a personal level. His gf broke up with him because he sexually assaulted the female half of their best-friend-couple. He fingered her while sharing a bed with her and his gf, for some confusing reason. We talked about it and he gave me this wordy, bizarre, incongruent tale of what happened. It involved a LOT of details and qualifiers. When I talked to the dude half of the couple, the guy who was (and still is) with the woman who got assaulted, he said that my friend just straight up did a ton of nonconsensual shit. He also said that when his gf told other people, more people came forward saying this guy had been creepy to other women in their friend circle. This friend absolutely has a history of gaslighting and successfully avoiding trouble by forcing his way. I need to talk to him, but again, fucking choked. I have no ability to have any kind of “real talk” with him. We do not have a venue, and the prospect of confrontation is absolutely debilitating to the average WASP-y dude. Which brings us to our next situation.

I have a great friend I met in undergrad. She is very well-liked, and while I definitely don’t agree with everything she thinks, I really value her friendship. Her boyfriend is a fucking nightmare. Not really, honestly. There are actual nightmare boyfriends. This boyfriend is more of a waking nightmare. The kind of nightmare that becomes worse because it’s so hard to call out. It just keeps going. I’ve kept CLOSE track, and every SINGLE time I’ve hung out with them as a couple, this guy crosses the line. He says condescending, mean, weird, bizarre, shit that... there’s just no better way to say it than he crosses a line that normal people don’t cross. I haven’t counted, but we’ve probably hung out close to 30 times. Every time it happens, every time I give him another chance. I got a little counseling about this situation from a friend’s mom, just in casual conversation, and her advice was to figure out what in me upset me about this guy. At that point, I realized that what Eric Andre said is true: advice is stupid. Also, that I am not going to run my life based on what this person, who I previously looked up to in a god-like way when it came to relationships, says. I am going to figure it out on my own, because it seems like everybody’s solution to relationship issues is to never talk about them, or to have some kind of inner-peace solution that makes getting abused not suck so bad (looking at you, DFW). Ugh. Okay. Moving on, again. Because yep, there’s so, so much more. Again, asking questions here, not answering them.

Also, if you’re reading this and thinking “damn, bro, your life is boring,” that’s my point. This is just normal life. These are just normal people. This is the water we’re swimming in. It’s fucking tense, man. Living in the United States is tense.

I’m running out of steam at this point, but God damn it. My brothers are dick holes. And we’re great friends. They are guys who don’t ever cause a fuss, avoid confrontation at all costs, and are nothing but rewarded for it. Sometimes I think I have something to learn from them in that regard. But is that really the life we want to live? Just don’t communicate your issues? It’s just frustrating. They act superior to others, but are categorically unable to have an honest, undiplomatic conversation. They act superior to others, and are treated as superior. It feels a little like talking to robots, talking to them, decoding what they’re saying to ascertain how they may actually be feeling in a given moment. I have no idea how they feel about me. Or anything. I don’t even think they know or care. I think they just get by, and they’re rewarded for it.

Alright, moving right along. My dad. Damn do I want to not talk to that guy. I can’t talk about anything real with him. It’s like playing ping pong where the other person can only hit the ball if it goes where his paddle already is, and his paddle’s made out of glass. 

This is a sample of some real life issues I am dealing with, spoken as honestly as possible, as is evidenced by the rampant spelling and grammatical errors. College works into this as the thing that has given me recourse for dealing with this stuff. As a college educated youth, I can approach life in an informed, good way. This is life. Etc.

What am I walking away with? Well, I now know for sure that I have a lot of shit to work through. MAYBE more than one Tumblr post. Also, I guess I am proving that people still Tumbl in 2021. I am starting to really understand what the questions I have are. I think part of my issue stems from some feeling of being “out of the loop,” or having some natural, in-set outrage about not understand what’s going on, which was founded by years of being the same height as the people around me’s knees, being the youngest person in my family. Everyone around me were skyscraper people with adult conversations happening way up there. It’s a little imposter syndrome, I think, too. It comes from being the youngest, I think, too. Mixed with a natural sensitivity that I’ve noticed people like me have. 

My goal is to get better at living my life. That involves understanding how I want to live, it involves understanding what my values really are, thinking through them a little, and more. I think it’s really worth it. In the meantime, I am not a work in progress. I am a fucking careful, cool, bright, talented guy who is not perfect, but is working on it. And I am going to postpone making any big decisions about my personal life until I get some clarity.

I thought I’d get more to the subject of the new proletarians, which is something I was thinking about today when listening to Harmontown and asking myself questions about what college is for if it just makes us unemployable, debt-ridden, twitter douchers. Anyway. We’ll get to it again sometime.

This was nice. Let’s do this again sometime.

[atlaskat]

Home for the Holidays

Hello! @zamorawrites, I was your secret Santa this year! Sorry that I’m a bit late. I hope you’ll be satisfied with what I came up with for your prompt.

"You... want me to do what now?"

Roxanne's brow twitched. "I want you to come with me to my parents' holiday celebrations and pose as my boyfriend for about two days using that light-disguise-clock of yours."

Megamind's eyes were wide as two plates, his mouth slightly open. She could practically see the overthinking which was happening in his brain. He looked borderline panicked, which was -- in all honesty -- a little rude. He wasn't the one bound to a chair, with hair messed up from the bag which had been removed from his head only moments ago. He didn't even have hair to begin with.

There was something charming about Megamind like that, though. Startled, embarrassed, unsure what to do with himself. Shocking him was always a bit fun.

"I- what," he stuttered, "your boyfriend...?"

"Yeah," Roxanne scoffed irritably, "Wayne- Metro Man ditched me last minute. Vacation, apparently. Worst fa- worst boyfriend ever."

Megamind's expression had started to look more and more desperate as he struggled to wrap his brain around what Roxanne said. There was too much new information already.

Roxanne shifted in her chair, cocking her eyebrow at one of the brainbots idly passing by with some scrap metal part in its grasp. She didn't elaborate, which stressed Megamind -- he could feel the sweat under the skintight leather. Bad choice of clothing for the occasion, apparently.

"I'm not sure I understand?" His tone went upward to indicate a question. As if Roxanne could answer whether or not he understood.

Well, she actually could. He definitely didn't understand at all. "Will you please just come with me? My mother doesn't care if I bring Wayne home or some rando off the street, as long as I make sure I don't come alone."

Megmind blinked a couple of times, still staring at her, wide-eyed.

"Psst. Sir." Minion, although whispering, did not utter the words quietly. As if a 250-pound steel gorilla with a fish brain would ever be subtle.

Megamind turned his head after Minion's third try. "Uh- yeah?"

"This does not seem like a good idea, Sir."

"Oh buzz off, Minion. How many times have you two kidnapped me, huh? How many times have I given you any trouble?"

Megamind seemed to snap out of his trance at that, narrowing his eyes at her with an unimpressed look.

"Ah, only about every single time," he underlined sarcastically. Then why do you keep doing it, Roxanne was about to say, but bit her tongue. She needed to get back to the bottom line and ensure his cooperation. If she wasted time and Metro Man found the hiding place, her last-resort plan would go to a very bad fiery place.

Roxanne quickly angled her face a little downward to make her eyes bigger and batted her eyelashes sweetly. "Please~?" She said softly -- this was a very effective trick to use on Megamind, although she didn't use it often, because it was classic damsel behavior and she was not about to play that game with him. Still, desperate circumstances called for desperate measures.

Purple blush shot up to Megamind's cheeks, even to the tips of his ears. He swallowed, tensing the muscles of his throat in a very satisfactory manner -- one might even have called it hot. Roxanne would never let him know that though.

"Sir. Sir?" Minion called.

"Aaaa..." for someone so smart, Megamind had a terrible time with collecting his thoughts. "I'll, uh, I'll help you..."

"Sir!" Minion yelled in outrage.

Roxanne gave a satisfied, smug grin.

Megamind gave a grunt from the back of his throat to indicate for Minion to shut up.

A buzz from a warning alarm made the brainbots erupt into a chaos of preparations for Metro Man's arrival.

"I'm calling off this evil plan this time, Miss Ritchi!" Megamind exclaimed with his usual extravagant confidence -- a front to save face -- as he began loosening the restraints around her wrists. "Although do not be mistaken, this will not happen twice!"

Minion sighed, picking up the bag from its place on the control panel. Roxanne sighed too, but obediently let the cloth slip over her ears.

--

Roxanne pulled the thick scarf tighter and smoothed the front of her coat again. She fumbled with the train tickets, making sure they were there. Check. Her ID? Yep. Her wallet? Also check. Somehow she was nervous.

In all reality, fake-breaking up with Wayne had been a relief. Because that meant she got to ask Megamind instead. Of course, logically, she shouldn't have asked him -- she had a few male acquaintances, like Paul from Management.

She scrunched up her nose. Maybe not Paul from Management. But other people, for sure. Still, her first thought on possible candidates had immediately been Megamind. He was smart enough to understand what fake dating meant (unlike Paul from Management), and wouldn't overstep any boundaries. Which was kind of strange, since overstepping boundaries was kind of supposed to be a supervillain's thing.

And to be completely honest, only fake dating was kind of disappointing. She couldn't put her finger on why, but the feeling was still there. And it was painful to actually have to call Wayne her boyfriend in front of Megamind -- the last person she honestly wanted to believe the whole scam relationship.

He would never know that, though. If he found out she and Wayne weren't romantically involved in the least, he would stop kidnapping her and then they wouldn't interact with each other at all.

"Um, Roxanne...?" A timid voice broke her off from her thoughts. To her side was Bernard -- well, not exactly, behind those fogged-up glasses were a pair of shining green eyes. Eyes which definitely did not belong to Bernard.

"Meg- uh, M, M, Mike!" She stammered out the new name. "Let's go, the train leaves pretty soon."

"Mike?" Megamind looked unimpressed.

"Oh, shut it. It's not bad."

"It's not my name." He mumbled. Roxanne paused for a moment. He looked a bit like a sad puppy. With really red cheeks. Which wasn't weird at all, because of the cold and all, but the slight possibility that he was as flustered as she felt was exciting. But still weird. It should have been purple blush on blue skin, not Bernard's flesh-colored-crayon shade.

"Well, I can't exactly call you Megamind now can I?"

 Megamind huffed, pushing the button by the train doors and letting her board first.

"Alright," Roxanne held her glove with her teeth as she dug up the tickets, "we're... 29 and 30 C."

"Does your family live far away?"

Roxanne pulled the scarf over her head, then fiddled with the buttons of her coat. "We'll cross state lines, but not really more than three hours. Six, on a bad day."

"Hm..." Megamind hummed, his eyes following the scenery as the train began moving.

"What about yours?" Roxanne watched as Megamind-disguised-as-Bernard's eyes widened, his muscles tensing up. A painful expression shifted quickly over his face.

"I- uh, I'd rather not talk about it."

"Alright," she nodded, "I bet the holidays'll cheer you up."

That same expression again, the way his eyes dropped, his knuckles white from balling them into fists. Then a little chuckle and a weak "yeah". There was something about Christmas which didn't sit quite right with Megamind.

"Ah, well, Miss Ritchi--" he began, but Roxanne interrupted him.

"Call me Roxanne, we're supposed to be dating."

"R-Roxanne..." his voice trembled a little, and she realized how intimate it was for him to use her first name. Somehow. Most people used her first name, so it shouldn't have been a great big deal, and yet it still was.

"Yes?" Her voice was low, breathy, expecting. Megamind swallowed again, his beautiful eyes darting around from her eyes to her hands to her lips. She tilted her head with interest, adding a very quiet "Megamind?"

He shook his head softly. "My- my name is S-Syx," he stammered, eyes fixed somewhere to the left of her face. Roxanne felt her eyebrows rise with interest.

"It- it's not Megamind?" She kept her voice very low, as to not alert any of the train's other passengers. Which incidentally also meant she leaned very close to her Bernard-lookalike companion.

"Well, I guess they're both my names. Metro Man did the same thing."

"I guess... it's an alias." Roxanne nodded a little, "do you want me to call you Syx?"

He gave a small laugh. The way she pronounced it was different from how he had ever heard it before, a little nod to the fact that his first language was alien to every human on Earth. "Probably best to keep both of my names a secret for now. I can't believe I even told you. Must be those nosy reporter skills of yours."

Roxanne blinked, a little surprised at the sudden change in mood. "Ah, well, I can't help the effect I have on people. I'm just brilliant." She gestured poshly with her hand, indicating the joke, but Megamind simply nodded softly.

"You are," he said, admiration in his voice. She felt heat rise to her cheeks.

"Uuuh-- look! Snow!" She pointed, tearing Megamind's gaze away from her. While it wasn't Megamind's face, those were still his eyes, and apparently they were enough to make her weak in the knees.

Megamind, in turn, was glued to the window for most of the ride after that. Going up north meant the weather getting colder, of course, but he explained to her that he had rarely seen snow before. On the occasion that it snowed in Metro City, the snowflakes would quickly melt on the busy streets. Living his whole life in the Metropolis meant he hadn't really had the chance to see actual snowfields for real.

There was something childlike in his total excitement, the way he marveled at the thousands of little pieces of snow in the air. It was the same sort of giddy happiness he let slip every time he had a new machine to test out, a new concept to tell her about. Because he always did -- always explained his inventions to her, in such great detail that she could foil his plans. He was so thorough in his explanations that it killed most of his evil plots, because he gave her the information she needed -- Metro Man needed -- to destroy the creations. Which was a shame. They were fascinating things, beeping with neon blue lights, covered in metal spikes and black paint. Not to mention all the work behind them; finding the raw material was the least of his worries while creating them, Roxanne knew. She had seen the complicated equations for one of his machines once. She wasn't too shabby at math, she'd gotten steady B's throughout her life, but looking at that blackboard she felt like she was looking at a foreign language.

The train stopped in Roxanne's childhood city around lunchtime. "To call it a city would be to exaggerate," she said as they stepped into the cold air. "It's more of a town, really. You want to grab lunch? There's exactly one restaurant, if you don't count the McDonald's by the gym."

Megamind snorted. "By the gym? Doesn't that defeat the purpose of having a gym?"

Roxanne smiled back at him. "Oh, but everyone knows McDonald's is great for building muscle. Start your fitness journey today."

"America." He sighed, shaking his head with dramatic desperation.

"The country of stark contrasts, clearly." Roxanne chuckled. "Hey, that's the restaurant," she then pointed out.

"It looks like a very sad Italian man. Look at those windows, they're like his sunken-in eyes.

She turned around, eyebrows raised. "Damn, that's a bit dark. But... pretty accurate, now that you say it."

"Sorry." He laughed.

Still, he was pleasantly surprised by the food, once they got it. The atmosphere was nice in the little place; the Christmas decorations made it feel welcoming and warm. There were red bows on the salt and pepper shakers, and candles on the tables. Jingle Bells playing softly on the radio.

Megamind took another bite of his spaghetti. "So... Miss- uh, Roxanne, is there something I should know about... your family?"

"Hmm..." she hummed, "they're pretty cool. You'll like my cousin Evelyn, I think, she's real smart. And my mom knows I never dated-" Roxanne bit her tongue hard. She couldn't let him know that.

"Who?" Megamind gave her a confused look.

"Uh, never mind," she said a little too quickly, heat rising to her cheeks. "Mom just wants the rest of the family to see I'm not alone, so they don't start their bullshit."

He tilted his head, brows furrowed.

"I mean, they used to talk about how I would die childless and alone surrounded by my cats all the time before," Roxanne laughed nervously.

"Why would they say that? You're-" he fidgeted, giving a "never mind" of his own.

"Well... I guess they don't handle independent women all that well. And they're not a fan of my haircut," she stabbed her fork aggressively into the food, "makes me look too masculine, they say. And, you know, no man is going to be attracted to that." She dragged the words out in a snarky voice, imitating one of her aunts.

Megamind looked almost offended. "Why would they say that? You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, I don't understand why anyone wouldn't want to date-" he snapped his mouth shut, suddenly realizing what he'd said

Roxanne sat in stunned silence for a moment. People didn't usually call her beautiful, certainly not the most beautiful they had ever seen -- most compliments were paid to her from cat callers on the street when she would leave the office late at night. They certainly didn't come from people with eyes that made her weak in the knees.

"I- what?" She finally pressed out.

"Um, anyways, this food is actually pretty good. Did you eat here a lot when you lived here?" Megamind said the words quickly, almost forcefully, filling out the silence with anything but embarrassing honesty.

"Oh, uh, yeah." Roxanne blabbed, "I ate here with my friends after school sometimes. And everyone comes here when they eat out, unless they're really craving some McDonald's after a workout."

Megmind nodded as she chuckled awkwardly. "Why did you move away?"

"Well, I got into college in Metro City. And I always wanted to live in a big city. Makes work as a reporter more interesting when there's actually things to cover, you know."

"I understand. Do you like Metrocity, then?"

"I-" she sighed. "Yes and no. Frankly, I find the entire hero versus villain thing a little... much, sometimes. It's like the people stop thinking about morals and what's right or wrong on their own, they just rely on their hero to solve everything for them."

Megamind nodded slowly.

"And, honestly, if I have to write one more article on Wayne or Wayne's family or anything Wayne-related I'm going to explode. Nobody values real news anymore."

"I liked..." his voice trailed off for a moment, "I liked your last article, the one about the mayoral elections..."

She eyed him intently. "You did? I thought no one read that..."

He shrugged. "Your writing always interests me." You make anything interesting.

The moment was interrupted by the beeping signal of her phone. She gave an apologetic look before answering.

"Hey mom. Uh-uh, we're in town. Yeah. Yeah, okay." She rubbed her forehead. "Oh, mom, make sure everybody knows there's no Wayne this year either. No, it's over this time. I'm bringing... a guy named Mike."

Megamind called for the tab. He had a small, silent war with Roxanne about paying, which he won since having both hands free made for quicker wallet-grabbing.

"Guess your name's going to be Mike after all," teased Roxanne as they stepped out of the restaurant.

The snow under Megamind's shoes gave a very satisfying crunch, and he walked in a circle to make it crunch a few more times. "Yeah yeah, very funny. What's the moral compass on this, anyways?”

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, Bernard wasn't that happy to oblige with lending his image for this purpose."

"Oh, my family never goes to Metro City. They're all antisocial hermits, there's nothing for him to worry about."

"If you say so," Megamind shrugged, giving her a teasing look. "I think you might be more evil than you think..."

"Oh, come on. I would not encourage this image-stealing body-dehydrating business in normal circumstances."

Megamind laughed. "Okay, I didn't actually dehydrate the guy this time. I just made a hard-light copy of him."

"Poor Bernard," she shook her head, "I can't believe I keep abusing him like this."

"And for your own selfish needs, no less. Tsk, tsk, tsk." Megamind clicked his tongue, faking his disapproval.

"Well, what about you? Jumping into action to save someone on Christmas? Doesn't seem very evil to me." Roxanne retaliated.

"Oh, but it is!" Megamind exclaimed. "I'm using another person's identity to trick others into inviting me into their homes, tricking them into accepting me and maybe even enjoying my presence somewhat, when in reality, I am the villain, the monster people despise. And what could be more evil than that?" He grinned at her. Behind his humorist tone, Roxanne sensed something more.

"Come on, you're not that bad." She tried, "the worst thing you've done is, like, some property damage. And even then most of it is Metro Man's fault. I mean, your death traps are never actually dangerous and you let me go if I have a headache."

Megamind looked stunned for a moment. "But I- I kidnap you, take away your freedom-"

Roxanne gave him a bored look. "I'm not a damsel, remember? Besides, being 'kidnapped' is, sadly, the most exciting couple of hours my entire week. I actually look forward to it, which says some pretty concerning things about the state of my day-to-day life."

"You- what?"

"Oh, look, that's my parents' house," she pointed at the most embarrassingly overly decorated house on the street. There were multi-colored Christmas lights on everything in the yard, and a few plastic snowmen to boot. Even though there was enough snow to make real ones. Absolutely terrible.

Megamind looked a little absent, as if off in some other world. He nodded blankly at the horrible display of holiday-exploiting consumerism. Roxanne nearly dry-heaved at the garden gnomes with tiny Santa hats by the door -- something which even Megamind reacted to, as he gave her a look of "really?" She shrugged apologetically before ringing the doorbell.

A woman with big, dyed-blonde hair opened the door. She smiled warmly, opening her arms to embrace her daughter. Roxanne's mother had the same little beauty mark by her lip. So that's where Roxanne got it.

"Hello," said the woman, "you must be Mike? I'm Roxanne's mother."

Megamind shook her hand, "I'm pleased to meet you, Mrs Ritchi."

She smiled at him. "Welcome, please come in!

He reached into his bag and took out a small package, wrapped in light blue paper. It wasn't a traditional Christmas wrapping paper, but he found it exciting to leave a little hint to his true identity. He didn't want 'Mike' to erase him entirely. "This is for you. I'm sorry it isn't much."

"Oh, thank you!”

"Meg- Mike, you didn't have to get that! I told you there was no need-" Roxanne grabbed the fabric of his coat arm with a concerned look.

"It's fine. I wanted to. It's the holidays, after all." He smiled politely at Roxanne's mother, not pulling his arm away.

"Have you two eaten lunch already?" Asked Mrs Ritchi.

"Oh, yeah, I wanted to spare Mike from the horror of Linda's lunch casserole"

"Shh," Mrs Ritchi laughed as she tried telling her daughter off, "don't let anyone hear you."

Roxanne shook her head and tugged at Megamind's coat arm for him to follow her. "You and I will be staying in the guest bedroom."

"T-together?" Megamind whispered harshly.

"Uh, yeah? Couple, remember. It's only for a night."

Megamind rubbed his neck nervously with the free hand. He wondered if his nerves would be able to handle being close to Roxanne in such an intimate situation. Maybe he hadn't thought this whole thing through properly -- but he refused to go back and prove Minion right.

"You can put your bag anywhere. And take off your coat, they'll start a fire downstairs and it gets really hot."

--

Roxanne spent the next hour gazing dramatically at the terrible snowmen in the yard, criticizing her parents' choice of decoration every chance she got. Finally, she wouldn't stand for it any longer, and pulled Megamind with her to make some real ones.

He hadn't brought any gloves of his own, so there was a bit of a fuss over glove-borrowing before they got outside. Roxanne immediately made a snowball, starting a war -- Megamind was stunned for a second when the snow hit him in the face (it was much colder than he thought, somehow), but he quickly recovered and retaliated with full fire power.

"Okay, okay, cease fire!" Roxanne could barely yell through her laughing fit. "Let's build the goddamn snowman!"

She showed him how to roll the snow, making sure it was packed hard enough to keep it from falling apart. Megamind found it surprisingly fun to roll the snow and so he made a huge globe instead of a snowman, which made Roxanne pick up her ball and throw it at him. His was way too heavy to carry though, so she won that round.

Finally, they finished the snowman.

"He looks kind of disproportionate, doesn't he?" Said Roxanne as she stepped back to judge their creation.

"Oh, don't body shame him. That's just the way he distributes the weight."

"Okay, so what's his name?" As Megamind gave her a confused look, she continued. "I mean, he's basically our son, and we need to baptize him properly or he won't go to snowman heaven when he melts."

Megamind started laughing, and Roxanne was delighted by the sound. He held his hand over his mouth -- almost as if to stop himself, to not show his happiness, but it was such a nice sound. He hadn't seemed fully genuinely happy all day, and Roxanne told herself that the giddy feeling she got was only because of that.

"Alright, I understand," said Megamind between the last few chuckles. "How about we call him... Hal."

Roxanne’ss jaw dropped. "Hal? Hal?! My creepy coworker? God, no."

"Why? I thought you liked him. What is there not to love?" Megamind poked her teasingly.

"Jesus, I really don't!"

"Fine, fine, what should we call the snowman then?"

Roxanne hummed. "He kinda looks like Minion, no? How about Minion?"

"What? No, there's already one Minion."

"Ugh okay. Let's just call him Frosty, then. What's up with Minion anyway? You didn't want to bring him?"

Megamind looked suddenly frustrated. He sat down on the porch next to Roxanne. "I... had a bit of a fight with him. He didn't want me to come. Said if I went we wouldn't be... 'friends' anymore."

"What? Oh, I'm so sorry! Why would you even come?" Roxanne looked genuinely concerned -- she didn't want to be the cause of any bad blood between Megamind and Minion. Those two were like brothers, together through sunshine and rain.

"Because you asked me." Megamind looked right at her, his eyes as open and genuine as she'd ever seen them. Then he exhaled and completely fogged up his- or Bernard's- glasses. He chuckled. "Anyways, Minion always exaggerates. He'll be fine as soon as I come back."

Roxanne's mother's voice interrupted the moment. "Hey, you two, it's nearly dinnertime!"

They looked at each other, cleared their throats awkwardly. Megamind helped Roxanne up and they went inside.

"So what did you call the snowman?" Asked Mrs Ritchi.

"Oh, um, just Frosty. You know, the usual."

"Bo-oring!" Mrs Ritchi teased, and Megamind understood where Roxanne got her biting remarks from. "And he doesn't even light up. Really, I have no idea why you dislike the plastic ones so much."

"Because they're a constant reminder of how companies in the west abuse foreign workers and exploit the idea of 'holiday spirit' to make an ungodly amount of money that could instead be used to solve social problems around the globe?"

Mrs Ritchi gave her daughter a look of "really?" and Megamind gave a snort-laugh. Roxanne shook her head and sighed dramatically as she took off her boots. "Nobody in this house understands me. You're all slaves under capitalism.”

"Oh, shut up. You've always loved Christmas decorations. Mike, has she told you about that one Christmas-"

"Uh!" Roxanne called out. "That's enough of that!"

"No no, please do tell," said Megamind, smiling cheekily at Roxanne.

"Oh no you don't," warned Roxanne, before grabbing Megamind and forcefully shoving him in front of her. "I'll give Mike here a house tour now."

They paced around the room, Roxanne sighing at every decoration. "I'm not actually a communist, you know."

Megamind laughed. "I guess even you can't withstand the allure of cheap plastic."

"Oh, oh you're one to talk?" Roxanne said, faking her outrage. "I know an underground outlet store in Romania that would beg to differ."

"Okay, Minion was never supposed to let you know that in the first place, you know! Makes my credit as a supervillain look weaker."

"Ha! As if it wasn't weak in the first place." She chuckled. "Hey, let me show you something."

They walked up the stairs, through a corridor, and landed in a small room with bare walls. The ceiling was low on one side, and there was a window through the roof.

"This used to be my room," said Roxanne.

"Why is it empty?"

"When I moved out I took some of my stuff with me, threw some away. My parents had no need for a room full of things they never used, so it's just been empty since then."

"Seems pretty out of use to me."

"They want to turn it into a studio or something." She went to the sloping ceiling and laid down on the wooden floorboards right under the window. "I used to lay here at night, especially if it was clear. I used to wonder a lot about what was out there."

Megamind went to lie next to her. "I used to stay up and look at the stars a lot, too. Or think about them, since prison cells usually don't have windows."

Roxanne turned her head to look at him. "You were in prison as a child?"

"I mean, I lived there, so yeah I guess."

They were silent for a moment. He could feel the warmth radiating from Roxanne's body.

"Were you born on Earth?" She finally asked. He swallowed, fixing his eyes on the dark sky outside the window.

"No. I came to Earth in an escape pod as a baby."

She hummed along. "What was Space like? “

It was his turn to turn to her. He examined her features; the gentle curve of her nose, the defined cupid's bow. Her full cheeks, her dark eyelashes, the little dot by her lower lip.

"Space was terrifying. Beautiful. I've never experienced anything like it."

"I went out at night once, to a lake nearby. The stars were reflected in the water, and everything else was completely black. Floating there was scary because it really felt like I was out there, unsure of how to get back."

"Yeah." Megamind said. "Space is exactly like that."

Roxanne sighed. "Sounds like you and I both were pretty lonely as kids."

"You were lonely?" There was clear surprise in his voice, and she wasn't sure if he was mocking her or not. "The kids in my class were... quite exclusionary. I never really had any friends."

"It's a shame we didn't go to the same school, then." Said Roxanne, smiling. "I was always the kind of weird one, I was too curious, had too much ambition. And that wasn't attractive." She put on the snarky voice again. "Suck it, Ethan from junior high!"

Megamind laughed. "I really would've liked to have met you as a child."

They stayed for a few more moments in the dark, before Roxanne cleared her throat.

"We should probably go back, it's almost time for dinner."

"Right," said Megamind, although he would have rather stayed there forever.

--

"So what do you do?" Asked one of Roxanne's family members. Megamind stopped mid-bite, trying to think of a convincing lie.

"I'm, uh, I'm a physicist." He bit his tongue. They would ask at which university, or which company, or something. "Kind of freelancer right now."

"That's new," said a woman, who was named Evelyn if he remembered correctly, "a freelance physicist, huh?"

"Yeah! Isn't it cool!" Added Roxanne, only slightly panicked. Megamind chugged his drink nervously.

"What do your parents do?"

His mood fell instantly. He tried to smile to cover it up, but it felt really fake so it probably looked horrid. "My parents actually, um, they died in an- an accident when I was young."

"Oh my, that's horrible! I'm so sorry for your loss." Mrs Ritchi put a hand on his shoulder as she passed. He nodded thankfully at her. Some other sympathetic words and smiles were aimed at him.

"So where are you from?" Asked another person.

"Uh, Metrocity?"

The dinner table fell silent for a moment, before erupting with laughter.

"Oh, is that a reference to that little blue dude?" Said someone else, "brilliant!"

Megamind met Roxanne's eyes, and they both had to keep their laughter contained.

"Yeah, Megamind," said Evelyn, and Megamind's spine snapped straight. "He's pretty interesting."

"What do you mean?" Megamind asked. Roxanne eyed her cousin intently.

"Oh it's nothing," Evelyn smirked, "I had my agency look into him a couple of months back. He likes to put on a show of being evil, but he's actually that anonymous donor to the Orphan Childcare Foundation. You know, the one who takes first place each year?"

Megamind swallowed, staring at his hands. Or Bernard's hands. They were an odd flesh color, when they should be blue -- but right now he was so thankful for Bernard. Now would be a bad time to have a different skin color. He watched the seconds tick by on his watch.

"What?" Roxanne's voice was almost breathless, absolutely unsure of what to believe.

"Yeah, and there's more," said Evelyn, making Megamind question every choice he had ever made -- how could someone have found out so many things? "Apparently, he's a real big deal in the criminal world. He organizes a lot of the gang activity to make sure there are less gang wars... you know how the murder rate dropped after he and Metro Man debuted? Well, if you ask me, that's not really Metro Man's merit."

Roxanne's gaze turned to him, completely baffled by her cousin's words.

"Haha, well," Megamind said, trying his hardest to keep his voice steady, "you can never fully trust those investigations! Everyone knows how important Metro Man is to Met- the city."

The rest of the dinner guests began taking away the dishes, and so Roxanne cleared both of their plates from the table and asked Megamind for a word. Alone. He sighed internally -- this wasn't a good look.

She said they would go out for a stroll, and suddenly they were outside in the cold darkness. They walked in silence for a good while, until they got to a frozen-over body of water. Then Roxanne broke the silence.

"Ugh, can you turn that off?" She asked, almost irritated. Really, she was embarrassed. "The disguise."

"What? Why? What if someone sees?" He asked, totally confused.

She shook her head forcefully. He furrowed his brows, concerned. "I don't want to look at Bernard's face, I want to see yours."

He was stunned to silence for a few seconds, only able to breathe the word "what" once more. Roxanne lost her patience and grabbed him by the arm, turning the dial on the watch herself. The image of Bernard flickered a few times, almost like a glitch on a computer screen, before it disappeared. What was left was that beautiful shade of blue, his eyes finally back in the face in which they belonged.

"That's better." Roxanne said forcefully. Then she turned around and continued walking.

"Miss Ri- Roxanne, why do you want to see my face?" He asked, forcing his voice to be calm and collected as he jogged to catch up with her. She looked straight ahead, eyes fixed furiously, on the path in front of her. "Are you... mad at me?”

Her shoulders tensed up. "Is it true, what my cousin said?"

Megamind contemplated lying for a few seconds, but ultimately decided he didn't want to lie to Roxanne. "It's true," he said with a sigh.

"Oh, god damn it." She said.

"What?" His voice trembled, panic rising up. Had he lost credibility? Why was she so angry?

"Why didn't you tell me? Why do you play the game of supervillain when you're actually helping everybody?"

"I'm- uh-" he tried to collect his thoughts, "I think... um, Metrocity wants symbols and I just... became that symbol? Someone needs to be a challenge for your boyfriend in tights too, Miss Ritchi."

She turned around, furious, hot tears burning in her eyes. "Roxanne. It's Roxanne. And he's not my boyfriend, he never was my boyfriend!"

"You- what?"

"Metro Man and I were never a couple. It was just easier like that, so no one would ask any questions." She wiped at her tears angrily. It was embarrassing, and she didn't even really have a reason to cry. "And I didn't want to tell you because then you would stop kidnapping me and then I would not have an excuse to talk to you anymore. And now I've just found out that you're actually the hero in this whole thing, aren't you? And I'm so mad at myself that I wasn't able to find that out on my own."

"Wait, wait, what are you talking about?"

"Which part?" Roxanne said in a bitter tone, the half-joke not really landing.

"Why would you want to talk to me?"

She sniffled, wiping at her face angrily once more. "Ugh, for being so smart, you're really stupid sometimes."

"I don't... understand," he said.

She dropped down into the snow, face in her hands. "Why do you think I asked you to come with me here?"

"To the lake?"

"Oh, you idiot. Here to my parents' town. Why do you think I want to talk to you, and why do I want to see your face, and why does talking to you brighten my day, and why do your eyes give me butterflies in my stomach? Why do I feel this much for someone who's never going to feel the same way, why am I so stupid?"

He dropped to his knees in the snow, too, landing right in front of her. "What are you talking about?" His voice firm and steady now. "Why wouldn't I feel the same?"

Roxanne finally looked up, meeting his eyes. They glimmered in the faint light from the moon, the only source of light by the lake. "You wouldn't, because I'm not your type. I'm stubborn and I complain a lot, and I'm not feminine or scared enough to be a damsel. And I'm boring and I always criticize you, and I'm not- not attractive or exciting or any of all the things you are... how could you ever love me?"

"Roxanne," his voice was breathy and low, "you are the most intelligent, beautiful, interesting person I have ever met. I've been in love with you for years, and the kidnappings -- they're just for show, just an excuse for me to be close to you in any way I can. Yes I enjoy making my machines and fighting against Metro Man, but I make them because I want to finally create something which will impress you. That's why I always explain them to you, because you're the only one who has ever truly been interested in me."

She took a shaky breath. "But I'm... mean, and I'm stubborn, and I-"

"Stop that. I love talking to you, because you challenge me, but you don't judge. You're genuinely interested and you listen carefully to what I say, so you can counter it well. You're so intelligent it fascinates me. And I can barely stop staring at you, because you're so perfect, you're so much my type that it's difficult for me to think about anything but you-"

Roxanne's fingers curled around the collar of his coat as she pulled him close. She tilted her head and pressed her lips to his. His hands went up instinctively, grabbing her her hair, the side of her face, going around her shoulders in an embrace.

They kissed for a long time, breathlessly and barely able to tear themselves off each other. Roxanne's face flushed with red, but she smiled faintly.

"Syx..." she said, and it sent shivers up his spine. "I love you."

Megamind rested his forehead against her shoulder, the happiness bubbling through his blood, he almost didn't believe it to be true.

"Oh, Roxanne, I love you too."

[askwaterwitch-perbear]

Since I seem to see Kyanite be put on the spotlight. I thought I’d post some of my headcanons I have for my muses relationships with this particular original gem. In a list of headcanons I’d like to call 

Relationship towards Kyanite 

 Now going right off the bat. Let’s start with Lapis. There’s a lot to be said about Lapis’s dedication towards her fusion friend. She came into her life pretty late in life, and while not the most ideal person to get close to. Lapis did grow a rather soft spot for her. This was probably because of the transition Kyanite had sticking around her family. Suddenly she preferred Lapis over Peridot because of her changing and becoming one person. Lapis became some what a role model without even realizing it at first look. 

In Kyanite’s early development she used to badger Lapis for sweets or cry out for her attention to gain nothing really except sweets and affection out of boredom 

Lapis learned some life skills a greater sense of responsibility not only because of her friendships she had made, but because she had someone who needed her

She doesn’t always agree with all that goes down with Kyanite, but that’s not going to stop her from doing things that can be morally questionable with her. They both have a love for mischief and being snarky people.  

They argue a lot over who is prettiest but this is a façade genuinely Lapis doesn’t really care. She knows she is beautiful and she enjoys the notion of becoming an inspiring factor for some of Kyanite’s features. 

Lapis is a typical person when it comes to letting Kyanite venture off on her own because of her attachment towards her she’s super protective and doesn’t want her going out after dark. It’s that sometimes she forgets Kyanite has two full grown gems composed of her. She’s used to the whinny overly clingy gem she once was 

Whenever these two genuinely fight it can get pretty intense, but Lapis is normally the first to come out and admit she is wrong to fight unless Kyanite has seriously wronged her. But to this day that has not happened. 

Lapis was once very aloof around her being a fusion of aquamarine that is until she got to know the real person in the fusion. She feels guilty about it and hates the thought of anyone doing the same just because of that fact now. 

Overall I’d have to say for gems that would not originally see eye to eye now she is ride and die for the smaller fusion and she will do anything she can to help her crack a smile and feel loved and accepted.  

For Peridot Kyanite showed great interest in her upon first forming, but once she became more of her own person and moved on to other things. She initially grew apart from the nerd a tad. Despite this Peridot is still there to lend support and over invasive un-intentional ways to keep Kyanite safe. 

Peridot gets a lot of the full brunt of Ky’s notorious comments and the butt of Kyanite’s jokes now, but she takes it in stride because she’s quite inept at the comedy. 

She’s remained very loyal to the gem even though Kyanite has robbed her of many of her sweets over the years. 

Peridot is a very quick ‘yes man’ rather than the one to tell Kyanite no she can get easily brought into Ky’s good gracious because of nostalgia. 

Peridot truly cares for Kyanite and even the company she surrounds herself with it’s just there are times when she has her own opinions she can’t silence. n

Nothings too good for Kyanite when it comes to providing for her. Peridot is the first one to give her some money for all the little things she wishes to purchase on the side. 

While Kyanite may see Peridot as an old “Childish” friend now Peridot remains swift and cunning whenever Kyanite may try to trick her into doing something that is less to her ideal values. 

They bump heads a lot when it comes to Ky’s love interests. It’s all because of the fact Peridot believes Kyanite deserves better upstanding people. 

She knows Kyanite has a low image of herself which is a shame because Peridot actually thinks she’s got the most value in the whole family’s ranking. 

Peridot holds onto every bit of memory of Kyanite once preferring her but despite this she’s happy being number 2 favorite or 3rd behind everyone else. So long as she still wants her around and loves her all the same. 

After all she still needs her Peri hugs! 

Pumpkin. You would think I would have little to no information about these two. However, I have Plenty. Even though Pumpkin is a mere veggie head she has tried to be as loyal as they come. 

It’s no doubt that as the only dog presence Ky’s had Pumpkin has made colossal efforts to get close to the fusion. It’s just hard since she seems to perfer the similarly named family cat

Pumpkin makes a point to Ky to show little miss thing that she has commanding authority in this house often barking to wake her up every morning! Especially cleaning days and Sundays. 

The vegetable gets quite the snooty turned up nose from Kyanite but that only makes her lick her face more vigorously and grabs her pants and leggings with her mouth in order to guide her to the places of the house Pumpkin wants her to go. 

This crafty fruit can be fast at snatching things from Kyanite’s room like scattered clothes or shoes if she isn’t careful and has the habit to rip up her fishnet socks if they are left.

She has a bad rap of being secretly a ghost crime boss reincarnated and while we have no proof of that being the case. Pumpkin will cackle and wrap her tail around Kyanite’s ankle seemingly teasing. (we think?!) 

Upon opening the door Pumpkin is the first to hop over her footrest at that end of her bed and jump onto Kyanite point blank and bark in her window as an effective alarm clock she takes this job seriously 

Anytime Kyanite is on the couch Pumpkin will climb up beside her and slowing down these days Pumpkin will lay on her back in hopes that Kyanite will give her some affection. 

She will growl if she hears unfamiliar noises inside Kyanite’s room grab her sleeves in her teeth and guide her out of harms way. 

It’s good to be wanted and even though she’s not favored Pumpkin won’t let her forget she lives there and loves her as any good dog would.