#i WISH i could get the 3 panels to just have 1 huge first order insignia but it isn't possible alas and alack

[armitagehuxsleepschedule]

all remaining islands will bow to the first order: part 2

[caterpellas]

munich nights • harry styles

summary: touring inseparably as best friends and musicians, yours and harry’s relationship takes a cruel turn in munich.

warnings: smut (oral m recieving) 

genre: bestfriend!harry, friends to lovers(?), angst, smut

pt 1/? (two is here)         word count: 4k

a/n: this is my first time writing in like a year so some feedback would be amazing, pls be kind and show some love to my crumby attempt lol

chapter playlist :D

harry.

he was sort of your anchor. unspoken, of course, that he had taken such a high profile role in your life. he didn’t need to know, to know. you were certain it worked in reverse, that you grounded him just like he did for you.

you’re not sure of the timestamp on the beginning of your friendship, sometime 3 years ago after mindlessly chatting in a shoreditch bar, at the sort of venue you were both cackling over after a couple of overpriced gin and tonics.

“i’m not sure why i came here, it really isn’t my scene,” you said after calming your laughter down.

“me neither. i’m not all that into £18 cocktails made with organic fruit juice,” he jested back, although you felt a hint of sadness in the next, “it makes me miss home.”

after that you clicked instantly.

you both bonded over being musicians; your styles contrasted entirely though. his band, who you met a few occasions later, were the antithesis to yours. mitch and sarah looked and sounded like they were fresh from a 70’s pop rock band, whilst your bassist and drummer, both twins, had buzzed heads and black dr martens on 24/7. the differences between you and him didn’t matter in the slightest. which is why, after 18 months of building the strongest friendship you’d had in your life, he asked you and your band to come on tour with him.

touring with your best friend and now biggest fan was the single greatest experience of your life. you would admit to the apprehension you first felt about opening for harry as your music wasn’t exactly in keeping with his genre- you were a little grungier then his soft style. i suppose the opposites between you is what enhanced everything about your relationship, musically and personally. in articles harry was always praised for his effeminate fashion choices, and since gaining some recognition as his opener, the articles were now mentioning how you dressed too, hyping up your more boyish, ‘can’t be bothered’ clothing taste you’d developed over your years in the band. your shoes were always chunky and platform, your top or bottoms usually oversized and always with the same thick chain around your neck. to some, your style seemed intimidating but it couldn’t be further from the truth. harry knew that best of all.

3 months into the tour now, you had made it to munich for the 1st night of your european portion of the tour. you and harry were sat next to one another on the plane, sharing an earpod each, playing music from your playlist titled “h”. you hadn’t been able to sleep on the overnight flight, after reading a particularly disturbing article about harry’s recent paparazzi shots. “harry styles’ player ways making a comeback?” it read, and pictured him with a couple models you’d met in new york together after going out for the night. you couldn’t place why but the article made you feel sick. you put it down to seeing such a close friend’s name slandered in the press, and you hoped he hadn’t read it yet. harry was often disheartened after reading the gossip people like to spread about him, occasionally involving you as well.

“you seem very deep in thought.” harry’s morning voice could be heard over the sound of steely dan in your ears. turning to him, one of his eye’s peering at you, you reply, “not really- just thinking about the set list.”

“you need to switch off your work brain sometimes,” he grins up at you, “have a little more fun! munich will be great, lots of beer to try.”

“of course that’s what you look forward to most. you know munich is filled with some beautiful architecture and history right?”

“that’s great and all, but you know what else they have?” harry questions you and you shake your head.

“oktoberfest.”

-

you arrived at your airbnb not long after- harry’s band and yours all preferred staying in a large house or apartment then some posh hotel that didn’t feel quite as welcoming. harry’s manager picked the place out, opting for a villa that sleeps 10 people, filled to the brim with oak panelling and a big fire place in the centre of the room. there was a hot tub outside that would probably never be used in your short stay there. the kitchen had a large island in the middle and a big aga keeping the place warm in the late september weather. his manager really outdid herself this time.

“this is place is so beautiful,” you still weren’t over all of the beautiful places this tour had taken you, the short time you’d been travelling had been a sensory overload.

“you’ll really like munich, y/n,” harry said yawning, grabbing both your shoulders from behind. his touch took your mind back to the article.

“harry,” you started, reluctantly turning to face him, “i know it’s none of my business who you, you know- fuck, but i was just wondering what happened with those models after i left?” harry’s calm expression never faltered as he answered, “me and camila kissed in the taxi but then i went back to the hotel. why?” you didn’t have the strength to answer honestly, and tell him it was because the thought of him having a threesome with two supermodels made you physically wretch, but you felt an obligation to give him a somewhat truthful answer.

“i saw an article about it, the paps caught a glimpse of it,” you white-lied. if you were going to be honest with yourself, the reason him with people like camila and gina bothered you so much is because of the way you compared yourself to them. you were overall confident, you were proud of your style and “gives no fucks” attitude you’d built up over the years, but these were literal models. women who were paid, like paid a lot, because they were beautiful. harry’s dating history has had a lot of women you could never measure up to be as good as and that was a real confidence breaker.

“well anyway, are you ready for tonight’s show? we were thinking it would be cool if you guys came on with us and...”

-

harry, as per usual, performed with all of his heart and soul and yet again amazed you. he had been doing this for three months, playing at least three shows a week and his energy levels were still unmatchable. you were back in your dressing room, taking off your stage clothes and putting on an almost identical outfit, wiping the sweat off your brow and upper lip. the monitor in your room played harry’s set, and you had to find any way you could to distract yourself from his performance before you ended up fantasising about the way his sweaty curls cling to his neck and how you wished he was sweating like that just for you, for an entirely different reason.

“thank you so much munich!” you hear harry’s accent through the small tv, and look up to see him panting and grinning, before running off stage. you had no idea why, but tonight there was a small amount of nervousness about you. since reading the article, you’ve had to address the gnawing idea that you could possibly have feelings for harry that were more than just your deep set friendship. would you act differently about the man you loved more than anyone in this world? you didn’t want things to change- they were perfect with him. he’d jest with you when you became too much of a perfectionist about your latest song, telling you to stop thinking so hard or you’ll have an aneurysm. if people commented on his style or yours, he’d laugh it off and tell everyone he’s “the woman in the relationship” sarcastically, and you’d be in awe at how he essentially said a huge “fuck you” to gender norms. he made you comfortable being you and you coveted his ability to be so happy being him. the thought of this bond being broken frightened you to your core. the knock at your door was a good signal for your thoughts to end.

“you coming y/n?” the group of you were all headed to a german beer bar, since harry was so eager to try the world famous pilsner. finding a large lounge space with sofas inside the bar, you all sat and ordered a round, celebrating a good night’s work.

“to the first night in europe,” you toasted, “cheers!” all your glasses clinked together and the nervous feeling started to fade finally. sat next to harry, you discussed the tour so far, he told a story about being in one direction and it reminded you of a hilarious story from when you were 15, when you used to listen to emo music and swore how much you hated one direction, and they all laughed at the irony. if you had told your 15 year old self this was where you’d be at 21, you’d have snorted and laughed till you cried. but life works out in strange ways and you wouldn’t change it for a second. a few drinks in and any of those nervous feelings about what harry was to you had evaporated like alcohol till you eventually had to remind yourself that whilst your hand was on harry’s knee, it meant nothing. and the way he leans forward to you as he laughed at your not-so-funny joke. but those reminders were getting weaker the more his touch started to linger after he went to go and grab his pint the same time you did.

“we really must stop meeting like this,” he jokes as your hand rubs against his for the 50th time that might and you laugh at him because your afraid if you don’t play it off as a joke you’ll lean over and kiss him. you find yourself in need of a distraction from his low buttoned shirt and endless black ink drawn across his chest that you can see in high definition when your this close to him.

“i’m going to get another round,” you exclaim dramatically, telling yourself more than the rest of the group. making your way over to the bar, you can feel harry’s vision bearing into your back as you lean against the counter to get service.

“another round of pilsners on the table’s tab please,” you ask as soberly as you can. you’re not off your face yet, but the alcohol is definitely present, surrounding the corners of your vision.

“i’d rather by you a drink.” a slightly german accent crowds your ears and you look over to see a man, not all that different to some of the guys in harry’s band, smirking at you.

nervous, you reply, “no you don’t need to do that we have a tab here.”

“i insist.” afraid to be impolite you quietly thank him, and turn back to the bar. you can’t even think of chatting to guy at a bar whilst the man you love is sat so close by. even though it’s not returned, the pain of giving him up to flirt with a stranger is too much to bare.

“so what brings you to a local’s bar like this one?”

“me and my friends are working here for the night.”

“just here for the night? such a shame,” his smile, although attempting to seem unthreatening, is making you uncomfortable. the bartender seems to be taking forever with your order.

“i’m staying in a hotel a few minutes away, come and join me and their bar for a real drink?” your heart was pounding. you rarely got hit on so you were a little out of practice on how to deal with persistent assholes like these ones.

“i can show you how the germans like to do it.” that was it- he’d gone too far and you were so embarrassed by this point you were too humiliated to even reply to him. your neck was getting hotter and you could feel your cheeks reddening.

“you okay?” harry’s voice took you out of your panic-stricken state, “you were taking a while.”

turning to harry and preparing to tell him how this man won’t get the message, the german creep pipes up, “she’s fine mate. we were just discussing a date.”

“listen mate, i suggest you back off. alright?” harry grabbed your hand, tightly, and guided you out of the bar.

“harry where are we going?” you could barely comprehend what had happened in the last five minutes to even realise he was hailing a taxi.

“back to the house. i’ll text the others.”

“harry i’m fine honestly it’s no-“

“who said i was fine? i wanted to leave and i thought maybe you did too.” he was angry, which wasn’t something you saw in harry often. he was a happy guy, and optimistic about most things in life.

“is this because of that guy?”

“of course it is y/n.”

“i’m sorry i didn’t realise he’d be an assho-“

“why’re you apologising?”

this shut you up. you didn’t know why. this wasn’t the first time a guy had been slightly predatory towards you and you doubted it would be the last. after the first couple times your in situations like this you tend to see yourself as the problem and not the guys doing it.

“i don’t know, harry.” you climbed into the cab together and harry gave them the address, seeming somewhat cooled off from earlier. your head was buzzing from the alcohol and the fact that harry had essentially rescued you from what could have been a scary situation.

“harry?”

“yeah, y/n?”

“why did you kiss camila?” alcohol had made you more outspoken and you asked the question that had been driving your nervous energy all night.

“why are you asking?”

a little more honestly then last time, you answered, “i’m just curious.” harry shifted in his chair, slightly unnerved by the question. his whole demeanour had shifted entirely from earlier. he was close and warm with you, the friend you’d become addicted to being with. now he was closed off and moody- a rare sight for anyone who knew him well. you could have picked a better time to ask the question, of course, but you had to know. you had other questions too, like why he was so angry right now, and why did he care that i was chatting with a guy at the bar, even if he was a creep.

“because she wanted to kiss me and i wanted to kiss her. the same reason most humans kiss,” there was a slight element of humour back in his voice now.

“and that was it?”

“yep.”

“hmm.” you tried to ponder this, but your attention span was limited when you were this inebriated. your thought process had quickly moved from harry’s sex life to harry in general and his outfit of the evening- a personal favourite. he’d worn white cream trousers with a vest top and an unbuttoned short sleeve shirt, along with the necklace you’d given him last christmas. you could see his two swallows peaking from the straps of his wife beater and your mind wandered to the thought of having your mouth against them. against all his tattoos, individually placing a kiss on each and everyone that you had grown to fall in love with.

you remembered the memory of harry coming with you to get your largest tattoo,  a greek statue on your upper arm.

“harry you know this isn’t the first one i’ve gotten?” you laugh at how hard he was clutching your hand in the chair next to your seat.

“i know but i’m so excited for you. i want you to know i’ll be sat here the whole time to hold your hand,” he squeezes your hand to emphasise his point.

“harry i’m getting another tattoo not going into life-altering surgery.”

but inside, you were squealing at his words.

“y/n?”

harry’s less chipper current voice took you out of your memory and back to the cab in munich.

“you’ve been staring at my chest for a couple minutes,” his brows were furrowed as he studied your face.

“i want to lick it.” if someone had asked you why you answered with that, you genuinely couldn’t give them a good answer. alcohol didn’t do much to you, except allow you to have fun, and lose any sense of a filter. now was a perfect example of the effects. harry’s eyes widened at your candour- and so did yours. his calm expression only faltered for a few seconds though, before it returned to his neutral, warm face.

“what else?”

“i-uh- what?”

“what else were you thinking about?” your heart was beating so loudly you were sure harry could feel it across in his seat. why was harry asking this? you didn’t want him to know about your thoughts- they were far too embarrassing and far too private.

“i was thinking about all your tattoos,” you confessed.

“i was thinking about yours too.” you thought about all of your tattoos and remembered the dog rose you had on the back of your thigh, as well as the koi carp on your hip bone.

“which ones?”

“the flowers and the fish.” you gulped, knowing he was thinking of your most risqué tattoos.

harry, unusually, was completely serious as he said, “i thought about licking yours too.” you didn’t know where you stood with harry now. you were sat in a taxi, having the conversation with him that you thought would never happen. he wants you the same way you want him. he may not want you the same way a nagging voice told you. he could just be looking for an easy fuck, and you thought to yourself that even if that was all he wanted, you’d still give yourself to him.

“harry-“

“maybe we shouldn’t talk anymore, yeah?” you felt like you could cry- how could he not want to talk, and you were on tour together? this was the most gut wrenching feeling to have him tell you not to talk anymore. harry studied your face as you lip began to quiver, “jesus y/n i meant about the current conversation. of course i want to keep talking to you, i love you- you know, like a friend.”

“like a friend?” you couldn’t ever begin to describe how your heart felt like it fell to the pit of your stomach whilst the acid slowly burnt it away. friends is it. harry isn’t yours to have and he never will be, he just had to remind you in words of this.

“well we’re both a little drunk and clearly turned on- maybe just this once it could be more than friends? just for tonight, i mean?” harry’s clear green eyes didn’t stop looking into yours, and he seemed, i’m not sure, hopeful? as if on cue, the taxi took you back to your villa which was warmly lit from inside and you felt a nervous excitement crawl up your arms and legs at what could possibly come next. harry gave the driver the cash and you dashed quickly to the door of the house, the cool september air cutting through you both dressed inappropriately for the time of year. it dawned on you that your outfit- a big vintage men’s shirt with your oldest and favourite pair of dr martens with sheer tights- wasn’t the wisest choice. harry fumbled with unlocking the door and opened it to find the fire lit and the lights dimmed. it was more romantic than either of you would ever mention out loud but it felt like the house was routing for you. you weren’t sure where harry wanted this to go next, the air beginning to stiffen and feel awkward.

turning to face him, you started, “harry i-“ his lips met yours in an instance and any of the awkwardness left in the room had been dissolved by harry’s soft kiss. he tasted good, despite the beer you’d both been drinking and had you not been intoxicated by the pilsner and harry’s gentle touch, you’d probably care about things like breath. harry grabbed you by the shoulders, much like he did earlier that same day, and guided you into the room further, finding the large sofa and pushing you onto it. falling back, you glanced up at his towering figure. harry was already tall, but his powerful presence added a less literal height to him, and his shadow looked over you. you couldn’t help but stare at him as he shrugged his shirt off his shoulders, exposing some of your favourite tattoos of his. you got to your knees so that you were closer to his body and you finally relaxed in his presence, touching all the places you’d dreamed about. your hands raked up his torso to his chest and his head leant down to kiss you again. his lips were perfect and seemed made to be against yours so tightly, and made for the crook of your neck as well as they kissed and sucked there too. the fire in the corner of your eyes illuminated the small amount of gold in harry’s hair and he looked as angelic as he always did in your dreams.

“am i better than him?” harry murmured against your neck. the question caught you off guard. he’d only known one other person you’d had a sexual relationship with since you two became friends and that was a sound tech from one of his old touring groups that you had a small fling with. him and harry never got along and harry even accused him of purposely messing his sound up during a performance once. harry has walked in on you giving him head in your dressing room once and it was incredibly awkward but you both moved past it.

“who are you talking about?”

“you know, that arsehole sound tech from the american tour. do i kiss you better than him?” you could hear the layers to his voice- he was asking with a confidence that you felt straight in your core, but there was another layer to it- insecurity.

“god yes,” you gushed, he had to at least know how he physically made you feel even if you can’t admit your feelings, “you kiss far better then he ever could.”

an idea came into your head at this, “in fact, i bet you’ll feel better in my mouth then he did.” harry jaw slacks slightly and you give him a shy smile. talking like this wasn’t something you ever tried when you were having sex, but harry made you want to be honest. it was the closest you could get to confessing your love to him, and you’d take what you could get from harry right now. stunned into silence, you continue to undress harry, removing his vest to expose his lean stomach and small trail of hair from his belly button, that you kissed all the way down. he let out a sharp breath as soon as you got to the top of his pubic bone, and you finally noticed just how hard harry already was. with a little fascination, you dared to take it to the next level and cupped his length through his trousers, causing harry to groan at the contact. he felt big in your small hand, you couldn’t wait to reveal him, impatiently struggling with his zipper.

“woah, y/n, slow down,” harry puts a finger under your chin and you look up under your lash at him, knelt below him. his smile is a classic harry smile and for a brief second this feels like more than a casual fuck.

“you’re still wearing too much clothing.” harry bends slightly to get to the bottom of your shirt and speedily pulls it over your head, revealing your black cotton bralet and tights. harry’s mouth watered at the sight of you in nothing but your underwear and boots, your long hair falling in messy waves around your minimally tattooed arms. your sure your black eyeliner is smudged and your gloss practically jin existent but harry’s eyes make you feel like he wants nothing more then to fuck you.

“that’s much better,” he smiles again at you, and you take that as a good cue to continue on his member. eagerly, your hands go straight back to his flies, rapidly undoing them and letting his loose fit trousers fall from his hips, exposing his form fitted boxers and you get a much better idea of just how big harry’s cock really was. without realising you mumble, “i want you in my mouth so bad,” under your breath.

“fuck say that again.”

looking under your lashes again, you repeat, “i want your cock in my mouth so bad.” harry groans as his eyes roll back, his words almost being enough without your touch. but your hand still went back to his dick, pulling it out from the restraint of his boxers. it was thick and bigger then you had been with before. without missing a beat, your hand pumped him a few times, and his hips reacted instantly. as if beckoning for your lips to surround his cock, his hips thrust towards you again, and you obliged, licking and then parting your wetted lips for the head of his dick. the pre-cum touched your tongue and it urged you to take more of him further, swiping your tongue on the underside as you push more in. harry moans, gripping your scruffy hair in his large hand, and had to restrain from pushing your mouth around his whole length. as your mouth got acquainted with him, you started to move up and down the length, as harry’s moans got higher and louder.

“y/n your mouth is fucking magic.” the praise went straight to your clit and your underwear was dampening at the knowledge of the dirty things your mouth was doing.

“can you- fuck- can you grab my balls?” you responded immediately and cupped them lightly whilst continuing to bob your head on his cock.

“didn’t know you could you use your mouth for such dirty things, y/n. do i fill you better then he did?”his jealousy fuelled you to go even quicker, this time switching up to concentrating on his swollen head, your tongue lapping against it feverishly, whilst your hand pumped the rest of him. the combination of your hand and mouth was enough to drive harry insane.

“you do so good y/n, i’m gonna cum soon okay?” you release him from your mouth, and keep stroking him, eager for him to orgasm. you couldn’t describe the desperation you had to see the way he looked as he climaxed. if you were to die after this, you knew you would die happy, if only to have seen harry in that state of euphoria that only you could bring him to.

“fuck y/n i’m gonna cum,” harry pants, his thighs tensing and his eyes glazing over. you aim him over your chest and feel his load fall all over your breasts, soaking your bralet as he lets out a breathy moan. his breathes are loud and aside from the fire crackling are the only noise filling the space of the living room. you let his now soft cock go and fall back onto the sofa, too tired to think about all of what just happened, the only thought on your mind is of harry’s moans on repeat. your chest is sticky but you’re too exhausted to care. harry has slowly crept over to sit next to you on the sofa, and you’re unspokenly thankful he hasn’t distanced himself afterwards.

“i need to clean you up.” harry disappears as quickly as he arrived and comes back with a warm flannel. wiping your chest, you watch his face as his brows furrow delicately on his forehead and his mouth is slightly crooked in concentration. you loved every single portion of his face, and suddenly it meant something different. you had seen his face at it’s most real and vulnerable and you had that memory forever.

unfortunately moments like the one you and harry had finally shared don’t last forever, and once harry’s done wiping your  breasts off, he leaves a kiss on your forehead, grabs his clothes and leaves you on the sofa.

[wickedpact]

A ranking of all the TTT stories in order of how much I liked them.

(Oh god this is so long)

1 My Mother's Axe

BABY ANDYYYYYYYYYYYY. Honestly this one had the trifecta of developing a character's motivations, developing a character's backstory, & developing their personality. The story starting out with Andy teaching Nile to use the axe was so charming and fun, and you could feel that chemistry they had in Opening Fire, the way they teased and bickered with each other so naturally. I loved the wedge between them on the subject of the axe, how Nile was perhaps a little too young to understand Andy's feelings about whether or not its the 'same' axe. I also love how the axe is obviously the symbol of the franchise and hugely important, but you never get a sense of exactly how important it is to Andy until you read the story.

I love the entire Ship of Theseus theme, and how it feels so natural that for Andy she has to get attached to the idea of things rather than the things themselves because she'll always outlive the things themselves-- the axe is symbolically her mom's axe, even if physically it isn't. And I love how she clearly clings to that concept so tightly. "This is the labrys she held in her hands...." IT GETS ME.

And the fact that this sense of BELONGING, of FAMILY, of CULTURE is so important to Andy that she clings to it (figuratively and literally) with both hands. And of course it's important to her, she spent so long alone that the woman doesn't even remember her birth name. That axe (or the idea of that axe) is all she has left of her mother and that family/culture she was born into.

PLUS on that note I love how Andy doesn't remember if her mom was her actual biological mother, but it doesn't matter to her. This woman was her mother in all the ways that counted. And how her mom BETRAYED AND KILLED Andy but Andy loved her so much that she avenged her and carried her axe for thousands of years. THOUSANDS OF YEARS!!!!!!

I also loved how the story transcends the timeline of the whole franchise and seeing Andy through the years. Loved seeing her with the varying squads and with varying axes. Also baby Andy was so cute. It was cool seeing her so young. like holy fuck. Andromache The Scythian, Immortal Warrior (but smol). Love that.

Also I think this one is one of the few ttt stories that doesn't suffer from length problems.

tldr: goddammit greg you've done it again.

2 Zanzibar and Other Harbors

Zanzibar my beloved. I've said before, but it's downright comedic how little regard there was for Joe and Nicky's character designs in this story. The same person who does the colors for the regular comic did the colors for this one too, and you can tell, every panel of this story was Beautiful.

Ik there was A Lot of criticism of this one (lmao @ how the fandom had no idea what was to come) but I thought a lot of The Discourse was a bit dramatic. I did think Nicky came off as a little oblivious to Joe's feelings in this story, but I've said before, I honestly think that was a 'tone not translating' thing. It felt like Nicky was nagging Joe for [checks notes] saving innocent people, but Joe was so amused by Nicky's complaints I really do think it was supposed to come off as teasing.

Plus I know the 'Joe running off into danger and Nicky reluctantly following' dynamic wasn't popular (I'm a pretty meh on it meself) but I did love how Joe's impulsiveness (if you want to call it that) was interpreted as heroism and not hot-hotheadedness. All of the examples Nicky and Joe talked about included Joe explicitly saving people. (and it also took A Lot for the nazi to actually provoke Joe).

I also feel like their characterization here was closest to the movie canon-- the bit where they hear the woman scream and Joe goes running in to save her while Nicky swoops in on Joe's heels to comfort her while Joe and the nazi were fighting reminds me of the train car scene. Joe had suggested First that they go find Nile because she needed to be protected, and Nicky later added that Nile probably also needed emotional support. Similar reactions.

But it was So Good, the themes of queer community and the enduring nature of queer culture are Not themes you see in media that often and it was such a delight how it was done. Also it's one of the few more modern TTT stories that has a completely valid excuse for taking place when it did. Chef's kiss.

3 Passchendaele

I love the Duality between seeing baby Andy and then seeing Mama Andy in the very next issue. This story doesn't have a ton of meat to it, but the entire concept of Andy adopting a war orphan straight off the battlefield PLUCKS MY TENDER LITTLE HEARTSTRINGS, and I think it's especially poignant for comic!Andy. I think most people wouldn't think twice about movie!Andy doing something like that but comic Andy is so hardened and almost cruel sometimes, and seeing that even for her the world hasn't beaten all of the compassion from her yet is SO!!!!!!! this woman contains MULTITUDES okay, she's violent and angry and tired and Done but she's also so kind and compassionate and THE STRENGTH OF HER!!!!! Also the idea of her and Yitzhak co-raising a kid together is so damn cute. It was #mysterious pre-Yitzhak-story but now it's cute. holy fuck. It's cute.

& the headbonk panel of her and Zeus lives in my heart. anyways.

4 Many Happy Returns

I Know people weren't thrilled about Booker being in this one, but I've developed a pet-peeve about that: this story was *not* booker-centric. Booker only exists in this story to the extent required to explain the importance of the gesture Nile makes towards him. If there was a story about Booker making some grand gesture of kindness to Nile no one would be saying it was Nile-centric. bc it wouldn't be! Booker exists in this story to explore Nile's kindness, its not about him. I saw that a couple times and it bothered me. anyways.

AAAAAAAAAA I loved this one, the art was beautiful, I loved how Andy Nile and Booker were drawn (like their comic selves but.. more looking like actual people). I loved Andy and Nile's Bants, how Andy wanted to jump right in and Do Violence but Nile was basically telling her to hold her horses.

I feel like I'm just repeating the post I made on this story a few days ago, but I LOVED how Nile's plan revolves not around violence or Cool Mercenary Skills but on Nile's own life skills (as she canonly did a lot of minimum wage job-hopping before the marines in comics canon). Her plan used her skills, not the skills of an immortal warrior, and HER SKILLS were in fact more useful for the situation! lov to see Nile's resourcefulness and planning skills.

AND HOW NILE WAS PROBABLY WATCHING BOOKER??? it's so Much bc 1.) nile knew booker A SINGLE DAY and yet he made such an impression on her emotionally that she had to keep an eye on him and 2.) she said in the movie she wanted Booker to get off free with an apology. Yes she's a member of the team but that doesn't mean she's necessarily going to follow orders like a good little soldier. I also love how she convinced Andy to go along with it. her HEART, her KINDNESS, her THOUGHTFULNESS, UGH.

5 The Bear

Honestly I have like no negative things to say about this one other than a.) character design issues which is less about the story itself and is more of a 'tog comic in general' criticism and b.) too short, but it was supposed to be a tease, so.

But I loved Yitzhak, I wasn't expecting to really like him at all but like I said in my other post, he tickled me. I love characters who are Kind™, especially if they have little reason to be so given their backgrounds. Chef's kiss. Lov him.

6 Bonsai Shokunin

I know this one was a little controversial bc of the outsider POV but whenever I see people upset about that they never point out that the Outsider Guy (the samurai) existed as a reflection on Noriko. His ideas are explained in the text to develop hers. The whole story follows how she gave mercy to a scared young man and in response he murdered Noriko, repeatedly! Who gave him the right to inflict such pain and suffering on the world? In his opinion, the lack of response from the gods was his permission. And for Noriko-- over and over again she dies and suffers because she gave mercy, which lines up with her ideas in FM about how it's their fate to rule mortals and if they don't align with that plan/fate/whatever then they suffer. It shows some background to those ideas and how they developed in her mind outside of Ocean Madness™. Additionally, his idea of 'the Gods have done nothing to strike me down so it's fine if I do these things' kind of explains how Noriko may justify her own morally corrupt actions-- she's died so many times and it's never stuck. Maybe if she did die any of those times, or while she was in the water, maybe that would've been a sign she was doing something right, or at least doing something normal. But she hasn't died. Fate isn't done with Noriko yet. And maybe there's a reason for that. In her mind, it's just not a very pleasant reason, is all.

There were things I was kind of meh about tho. I did kind of wish we saw something of Noriko and the team, or smth explaining the way she was before her dip in the pool-- personality, likes dislikes, etc. but it wasn't bad or anything. It was super vague tho, I had to read it a few times before I got what it was going for. Liked the art. Liked the bonsai metaphor. And of course I Respect the decision to use the 1300s (1200s? I don't remember off the top of my head) rather than using the last 200 years.

7 Strong Medicine

Honestly looking back, this one made me kind of sad because both this one and Bonsai Shokunin explored character's ideas on Fate and The Divine and how that intersects with immortality and I totally thought that theme would be continued, especially with Love Letters. But Then It Wasn't™.

Admittedly.... I had to re-read this one to remember most of it. I liked Booker's ideas on God, 'The conductor of the symphony just may not be very good at his trade' but the plot itself was kind of forgettable. Some fuckin cowboys try to kill a doctor (their second) because he couldn't save their sickly brother. Book tries to stop them, gets killed, and then comes back and kills them all before they get the doctor. Alright. I liked the artstyle because the characters were ugly in a similar way that leandro's are, but way more bearable.

I love the Irony of Booker concluding that there is no such thing as fate or destiny and nothing has meaning, AS HE UNKNOWINGLY SAVES MERRICK'S GRANDFATHER FROM BEING KILLED. Booker getting fucked over by life/god/destiny yet again. It also kind of explains about where the fuck hell Merrick's interest in immortal mercenaries even came from.

I originally had this one a lot higher and then I thought about it and moved it down like two spots.

8 Never Gets Old

I liked seeing Booker interact with his kid. And we got a name for the kid! Philippe was a little bitch though, he was a little obnoxious. I liked how Booker was so thrilled to experience a restaurant with his kid (and since we know he was there before, it can be assumed he went with all of his kids and yet he was so charmed each time). It fits with his line to Nicky in the moon landing story about how you don't appreciate beautiful things 'unless you have someone to share them with'. It was charming to see Booker interact with his kid, and to see him so happy. Also lmao @ Booker's big fat Ye Olde Crush on Andy.

However at the same time it was like.. of all the things to write about,,, I guess? Booker's Night Out...... alright. Especially since Book had so many stories.

I don't know, it was alright. The old man killing him really came out of nowhere, (but the 'Salut, asshole!' panel was funny tho).

9 How To Make a Ghost Town

I've hit a point where talking about these stories has gotten less fun. I liked this one but I felt like Achilles getting lynched was not really necessary for a story that was already tragic (a story that already involved Achilles doing a lot of suffering at the hand of bigots). When we first got the blurb for this story I thought it would be about Andy returning to the squad and making friends with Booker after losing Achilles and them butting heads on the idea of family and when to cut off ties. So a little bit of my underwhelmedness about this one might be just my expectations being different.

Honestly I was pretty interested in Andy and Achilles' relationship and I would've liked to see more of them-- like, what was their dynamic like? What did they love about each other?

But anyways Andy leaving and Achilles getting killed anyways feels so pointlessly tragic (which I suppose is the point..... I don't like tragedies) she left to save him and yet people killed him anyway. Meh.

I did love the bits about Andy wanting to have a domestic life (Andy and her multitudes again) and the little detail about how she buried her axe near the road but he buried his guns under his bed-- he was an escaped slave, he never had the luxury of assuredness like Andy did. It was a sad story.

10 Lacus Solitudinis

'You put this one above love letters crim??? how could you???' easy, lmao.

There was stuff in this one I liked. But to talk about stuff I didn't like: (I'll keep it brief, I know ragging on this story has been done time and time again)

UH, setting aside the 6 year cold shoulder between Joe and Nicky, I thought their chosen method of conflict resolution was... bad at best. Nicky's inability to talk about his feelings was also annoying, especially since the entire point of this story is a fight Joe and Nicky had, and yet we don't get both sides to the story, which is...... important? That fact is especially annoying bc in the absence of Nicky explaining his side of the story, it's absolutely a possible (and admittedly probably unintentional) interpretation of the text that we do get that Joe routinely resolves conflict between him and Nicky by simply cutting Nicky out of his life entirely until Nicky just. caves? Even if it takes years?

WHICH i could get into that interpretation and how fucked up i find it. but im not going to. out of restraint.

I don't know, I think there are a lot of interesting ways to go about this conflict but 'Nicky wants to kill a guy and Joe refuses to acknowledge his existence until he stops because he thinks Nicky is too much of a Good Boy to get his hands dirty like that' ('I wont watch as the world turns his (...) compassion into something ugly'. ) wasn't.. how I would've done it. (I mean you know Joe doesn't give a shit about what Nicky is doing in a moral way, because Joe doesn't even care or mention that Booker is killing those cops too. Joe only cares because he doesn't like the idea of Nicky changing in a way he finds undesirable.)

admittedly I've said before, I do like the emphasis Joe's reaction puts on Nicky's kindness. Joe has a complete inability to cope with Nicky simply Not Being Kind. It speaks to the steadiness of Nicky's compassion all those years. but still that fact doesn't make it the conflict feel worth it

hm. I said I would be brief and I wasn't.

oh well. basically I thought there was interesting conflict potential there but it wasn't done the way I would've liked, and the way it was done leaves a lot of disturbing (and again probably unintended) interpretations to lie.

What I did like? Andy and Joe having that pessimist/optimist dynamic. Joe nerding out about science. Andy not being impressed by The Achievements Of Man. I loved Booker needling at Nicky about his outdated slang and also trying to give him Older Brother advice practically in the same breath. I loved Booker giving The Worst relationship advice ever and Nicky being like 'I Will Not Do That, Ever, Thanks.' the family vibes were so good. The Joenicky vibes left a lot to be desired tho.

11 Love Letters

I talked about my problems with Nicky in this story (and Lacus Solitudinis). I don't know, the story isn't bad but I do hold a little bit of a grudge towards it because its very existence begs the existence of a solo Joe story and we didn't get one. If we never got this story, then we could happily count Lacus Solitudinis and Zanzibar as The Joenicky Stories™ and move on with our lives. sigh.

I remember when we first got the blurb for this story I was really curious about why Nicky specifically + the setting, and the answer kind of feels like 'the author had an idea for a story like this and saw ttt as a good enough place to utilize that idea'. Plus I was really underwhelmed by the Romantic Sentiment in the letter. If you look at it line-by-line, the majority of the letter is actually Nicky talking about how lonely and disturbed he is, rather than actual,, yknow,,, Romantic Sentiment. I mean, compare the van speech and this letter and this letter is just kind of meh in comparison. I liked nicky calling joe wise! and I liked the brief sun/moon metaphor! and otherwise it was eh. It didn't even have cute squad banter, which is why Lacus Solitudinis is above this one.

12 An Old Soul

Nun orgy. Nun orgy?????? Nun orgy.......

The whole story felt like a setup to have a nun orgy. Why did Booker have abs? Why did they do that to Andy's nose? ?????? the art was good at least.

nun orgy.

[ramuoto]

TOP 10 MANHWAs

if anything good came out of 2020, it’s my discovery of manhwas. 

well, it’s not like i’ve never read a single manhwa in the past 15+ years but tbh, the ratio of manhwa:manga i consume on a weekly basis has jumped exponentially this year. previously it was like 1:99 and now it’s like 90:10 LMAO. 

so, just to remind myself that the world is still full of good things, i had to make this list. which i will probably edit in the future, if i can be bothered to. :) 

anyhow, this list was not made in any particular order, just whichever came into mind. it’s loooong so be prepared! (I’ve read way more titles than mentioned but just included the ones worth checking out)

for whoever stumbles across this list, i hope some of these resonate with you and i hope they make you as happy as they made me. 

pic credits: https://geekculture.co/geeks-guide-to-transmigration-novels-avoid-death-at-all-costs/

1. Ebony

https://mangadex.org/title/41838/ebony

Bahahah omg he looks evil there! But our dearest archduke is hardly that aww. Soz, I just ripped off the covers of the manhwa cos I can’t find a panel I liked more than another. I mean, this manhwa is a GEM. I can’t even begin to describe this because everything about it blew me away. This is not something you read when you are craving for fluff, or just wanna have something brainless after a hard day at work or if you just wanna have some eye candy lol. This is something you pick up on a weekend, when you have time, because you need those hours to digest, appreciate, clutch your chest, tear a little because you find yourself falling in love with these characters. It doesn’t have any of that cliche isekai, romance, revenge themes going on. It has a solid plot, backed by incredible characters, beautifully woven by the authors and artist with incredible pacing that keeps you on your toes and keeps you looking forward to the next chapter. Maybe I would have been happier if I found it after it was completed lol. HAVE I CONVINCED YOU ENOUGH TO MAKE YOU WANNA READ IT?! like, idk, just go. JUST GO READ IT GDI. 

p.s. it says there romance but naaaaaaah, dont go in with that expectation. :) this story is so much more than that. 

2. Bring the love

https://mangadex.org/title/44472/bring-the-love

This...this!!! THIS MANHWA NEEDS MORE LOVE. If you need a lot of fluff, a little, ok maybe quite a bit of sadness and tragedy, sweet sweet romance, cutie pies, please, look no further!!! Again, pacing, character development are so important to me and this manhwa aces it. I love the 2 MCs very much. And the side characters too. :)

3.  A Stepmother's Märchen

https://mangadex.org/title/39474/a-stepmother-s-m-rchen

When I first read this, i fucking cried. like please don’t ask me why. it’s not like its an absolute tragedy but I was just rooting for the MC so much and I really want for everything to go her way. That’s how much I adore this MC!!! I LOVE HER. I LOVE HER MORE THAN YOU DO NORA! HAHAHHA. okay soz. I need to keep this spoiler-free.

Anyhoo, there is nothing typical about this time travel plot. Sure, she goes back to try to undo the stuff that went wrong but phew, she certainly changed things so much everything that comes her way have made it so her previous experiences can hardly help aaaaaaand that’s what makes it fun! I sometimes wish the pacing could be a little more consistent, and there could be more characters I could love a little more wholeheartedly (so i wont have to be in so much despair when i read this sometimes lol) but omg the art, isn’t it pretty?! I’ve re-read this soooooo many times but the art blows me away all the time. And have I already mentioned how much I love her?! I LOVE YOU SHULI! AND I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY!

4.  Lady Baby

https://mangadex.org/title/34691/lady-baby

I literally LOL-ed when I saw this cover. WHO THE HELL ARE THEY. WHAT LADY BABY?! ehehehe. okay anyway, uhm, this is already incredibly popular. im not sure if i need to elaborate but yes, it’s adorbs!!! i dont think i like the MC as much as i love her family lol. and everyone else who adores her. im looking forward to when they get older. :) actually not really. please stay cute for as long as yall can! but yeah, i do wish the plot can move a lil faster. i want to see more character development in the other kids too COME ON! 

5.  Death Is the Only Ending for the Villainess

https://mangadex.org/title/47754/death-is-the-only-ending-for-the-villainess

am i allowed to reveal how shallow i am rn? like the previous choices were all like ‘wow-deep-plot’, ‘wow-character-development’ and this one i just included cos of AESTHETICS ALONE?! the novel covers are breathtaking!!! the manhwa art is amazing as well. and the harem is great! LOL. as for plot... uhm... it’s alright. it’s pretty engaging and i quite like the MC, she’s smart and independent and i love how she views them all antagonistically at all times HAHAHHA. her past is kinda... weird though and i do wish they’d stop referencing it. cos... girl why do you wanna go back to reality!!! stay here! it’s way more exciting! 

i love the whole isekai/reincarnate/transmigration theme and this is honestly one of the better, not-so-cliche or cheesy ones HA.

6.  Beware of the Villainess!

https://mangadex.org/title/47286/beware-of-the-villainess

do you already see the whole villainess theme?! am i suppose to start feeling embarrassed about my choices?! NO! cos this one is AWESOME!

again, another wildly popular title. for good reasons. it’s hilarious, our MC is as real and candid as it gets and LOOK AT THAT BLUE HAIRED BEAUTY. DO YOU SEE HIM?! IMPLANT HIM INTO YOUR MEMORY NOW!

it’s highly entertaining and breaks all isekai-reincarnation-villainess plot stereotypes. definitely one of the titles i look forward to every week.

7.  Who Made Me a Princess

https://mangadex.org/title/32506/who-made-me-a-princess

what? why did i choose this?

BECAUSE OF CLAUDE OF COURSE. ahahaha. okay aside from the amaaaaaaazing art and the beautiful people, the plot is not too bad. a little extreme at times but it’s interesting enough to keep me going. it’s currently on hiatus though and i was highly annoyed by how the first season ended. (YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED? NOTHING.)

i hope the plot can move faster in the next season! and that our dearest MC athanasia can you know, finally be a little more useful... like omg just tell lucas already!!! and tbh girl, no matter which guy you choose, i approve. :D 

8.  The Flower That Was Bloomed by a Cloud

https://mangadex.org/title/37648/the-flower-that-was-bloomed-by-a-cloud

i featured this before, mostly out of frustration HAHAHA. do you see why i chose this cover?! yeah, i support this (unpopular) pairing okay! the other one is doomed!!! no matter what the author is trying to do now!! I DONT SUPPORT IT!!! lol.

anyway, i had to feature this cos the art is unique! and the story is great. :) and i looooooove listening to the ost while i read it. it starts out kinda slow but as the pace picks up, you won’t be able to stop. and you find yourself conflicted at various points. it did win an award for a reason. 

no matter what, i still think dowun is best for her okay. it’s dowun or nothing. he’s devoted to her, we all know that! he just needs to ditch that annoying female guard!!! ok yknw what, maybe nothing is better. :/ *cries*

9.  Solo Leveling

https://mangadex.org/title/31477/solo-leveling

why do i even bother? this manhwa is popular enough. 

the art is great. the MC is great. i use him and his gang as my wallpaper. 

im just not sure i like how this season’s plot is progressing. :/ but i guess it brings us nearer to solving the mystery in the first leg of the manhwa. i just enjoyed the whole part of him leveling up and now that he isn’t really leveling up anymore... idk. am i hoping for more plot shit like bleach (oh wow now u quincy?)... idk man. anywho, no regrets starting on this series and marathon-ing it to death. 

cross fingers the plot picks up and doesnt get too complicated for its own good.

10.  The Reason Why Raeliana Ended Up at the Duke's Mansion

https://mangadex.org/title/31606/the-reason-why-raeliana-ended-up-at-the-duke-s-mansion

okay, tbh, by the time i reached 10, i still have like 15 other series i was considering LMAO. i even considered lengthening this top 10 to top 15. but that would just be more of me and my nonsense. so... why did i choose this?

COS I LOVE THE 2 MCs!!! they’re adorable. the plot is again, kinda far-fetched at times (i literally laugh my head off at some parts) but it’s isekai-reincarnation okay! anything is possible in whatever magical crap country you end up in! lol. and i like how straightforward it is... in the sense there’s no 2nd lead. like okay i mean they are there but we all know they have no chance. oops. sorry!

and cos i can’t give up on the other titles i have, imma just list them down, without pictures... cos im tired. HA. 

11. Doctor Elise 

https://mangadex.org/title/29474/doctor-elise 

Kudos to the huge improvement in art style lmao. The good... lovable MCs, engaging plot. The bad... sometimes lengthy, incredulous medical moments (i work in the medical field so i... idk. sometimes this borders on iryu LMAO and i need to remind myself this is romance) otherwise, this is a highly highly entertaining read.

12.  Seduce the Villain's Father

https://mangadex.org/title/46775/seduce-the-villain-s-father

This is another of my ‘father-love’ whims. MC is adorable and ML is handsome. enough said.

13.  The Villainess Lives Twice

https://mangadex.org/title/49644/the-villainess-lives-twice

This is like a lesser version of Ebony and Bring the Love combined HAHAHA. The plot and premise is great and it’s awesome to marathon! I don’t find myself loving the MC as much as I should but the ML is a darling! I just find her a little toooooooo gloomy. Like come on girl, be more spunky! 

14.  The Stereotypical Life of a Reincarnated Lady

https://mangadex.org/title/46790/the-stereotypical-life-of-a-reincarnated-lady

I dont know why I like this so much HAHAHAHA. It hardly has a plot. I just find the MC and ML amusing i guess lol. 

15.  I'm Stanning the Prince

https://mangadex.org/title/45586/i-m-stanning-the-prince

Sometimes I wonder if I should be ranking this higher but I kinda feel this manhwa is trying to achieve too much with an underpowered MC. I love her... but I just don’t like how she’s just a pawn of everyone else and I dont know how she can change this situation of hers. It’s cute though. the MC and ML.  and the ML reminds me so much of american/jap Mackenyu. 

16.  The Villainess Reverses the Hourglass

I HAD TO. the art is so pretty! but girl, dont use the hour glass so much! you look a little too old! i would appreciate it if MC stops basing too much of her moves on the “past” tho like idk you are gonna sound unoriginal soooooon like develop your own thoughts soon okay? <3

17. Inso's Law

ANOTHER ONE. omg. im a lil on the fence regarding this but i like MC too much. and her harem LOL. i dont see where the plot is going either but i just hope for a happy end... ):

18.  Why Are You Doing This, Duke?

HAHAHA. this is sooooo sooooooo cute, i would have ranked it top 15 if it wasnt licensed by tapas tho cos they are a joke. WHY NOT TAPPY GDI. 

19.  Miss Not-So Sidekick

Uh-oh. Is this a top-20 list now? anyway, the MC for this series is GOLD. im not liking where it’s currently heading tho thus the lower ranking.

20.  IRIS - Lady with a Smartphone

omg IVE NEGLECTED THIS FOR TOO LONG. lemme go buy more chapters hahahaha. it’s a tad too lengthy... otherwise i like the MC and yummy ML!

still not enough?

Special Mentions - Okay, these will be unranked cos I don’t think these are that good but probably still worth a read.

I've Become the Villainous Empress of a Novel - this is new, im looking forward to how it progresses wheeeee.

Lady to Queen - It’s a ruthless manhwa. There was a point i started reading all sorts of sadistic content (i was running out of content i swear) and this was one of the better ones. I appreciate the MC very much. the plot now is a little weird and im a bit wary of the MC’s sister... hopefully the ML can be more useful. he’s pitiful though. but dude come on, dont rely on the wrong gal.

Goodbye, In-law - I’m not sure if i like the current progress buuuuuuut MC and ML are cute so who cares.

The Duchess' 50 Tea Recipes - plot is still engaging. MC and ML are cute. i dont know where the plot is heading towards though. 

A Falling Cohabitation - this is interesting and fun but a lil lengthy.

Light and Shadow - the sequel is out!!! i highly enjoyed this entire series!!! i would have probably ranked it a lil higher if i did this post earlier but too many series have overtaken this in my heart lol.

This Girl Is a Little Wild - is the hiatus ending yet? i would add it back to top 20 if it came back LOL. it’s highly entertaining tho. ML is adorable.

The Duchess With an Empty Soul  - pretty nice. MC and ML are a little boring. i think it can end soon. LMAO.

A Capable Maid - it’s amusing how she gets her powers for all sorts of situations lol. the prince is creepy tbh. and im secretly rooting for the other king hehe.

Beware of the Brothers! - it’s cute and heart-wrenching at the same time! not too sure im digging the latest plot development but okay... i’ll take it. they’re all cuties.

Living as the Tyrant's Older Sister - hehehe. it’s cute. duke is kinda silly but the latest chapter made me squeal!!!

The Evil Lady's Hero  - idk where the plot is going but MC and ML are adorable!!!

The Dragon Next Door - HAHAHA. it’s hilarious.

The Youngest Princess - she’s growing uppppp noooooooooooo

Virtues of the Villainess - ginger is hilarious. i dont see where the plot is going tho... and cant say i like the ML yet. i dont even get to see him much, hello?!

The Justice of Villainous Woman - pretty wholesome... i like the MC! (the ML is fine. no one else to contend with so...) can u end already?! lol.

Amina of the Lamp - hey, what happened to this? it’s pretty inconsistent but i do like the MC and ML... and the art...

The Villain's Savior - this is some sadistic shit. i reserve it for when i feel sadistic. i pretty much wanna see MC happy but idk if she’s making the right choices. :/

I Don't Want to Be Empress! - HAHAHAHA uhm it’s getting interesting. i just want ML to step up more... 

La dolce vita di Adelaide - I FINISHED THIS! and it’s wholesome, feel-good and cute. some parts felt a lil extra but ah whatever.

The Black Haired Princess - plot. move. faster!!! otherwise the MC and ML are pretty cute.

The Abandoned Empress - im a lil on the fence but i know how popular this series is. it started out HORRIBLE. i hated the ML so much. and then i found the green hair boy creepy. like MC, you need better taste in boys. it’s certainly getting more interesting now though. so please, continue to make my money’s worth!!!

Lucia - i. am. not. guilty. of. anything. *smut warning* anyway go read the novel. it’s better. hehehe.

What's Wrong with Secretary Kim - i do not need to elaborate any further. 

Past loves 

I created this section just to remind myself, that what i could like one day, i could hate the next LOL.

The Monster Duchess and Contract Princess - I know this is wildly popular. but i lost interest in it once she grew up. i dont think she’s particularly lovable. soz.

Survive as the Hero's Wife - another popular choice. I find the plot kinda boring now. MC and ML are cute though. 

Sincerely: I Became a Duke's Maid - another popular one. again, boring plot. like cant it end yet? oh you mean we need to wait for the real female lead to show up? dont need luh.

I Am a Child of This House - wow. the plot is shit now. and i do not support the MC and her guard. soz. she’s OVERPOWERED tbh. 

This Is an Obvious Fraudulent Marriage - idk what happened but my enthusiasm for this died.

Charlotte and Her 5 Disciples - i don’t get it. i dont get their obsession for her. 

[skdubbs]

Let Love Find You

Chapter 1: An Awkward Introduction

Summary: Love has a funny way of finding you when you’re not looking for it. Commander Fox discovered this the hard way when a box arrived on base and pique his interest. 

Here it is. I can’t believe I'm finally doing this. A huge huge HUGE shoutout and thank you to @detroitbydark​ for all of the encouragement, feedback, and listening to my ramblings about this story. You’re the best. 

This story will be the first in a collection of three interconnected stories taking place at the same time. I hope you all enjoy! 

It all started with a box.

Commander Fox of the Coruscant Guard stared at the parcel currently sitting on his desk amidst piles of carefully cataloged holopads. The contents of said package laid innocently next to the box. He’d had part of it scanned and tested, twice. Absolutely nothing alarming to be found. And yet Fox was still unsettled.

In the year since taking up his post, he’d never been rendered speechless. Well, today the boys could mark it down in the books. Truly, the commander didn’t know what to say. Or think. Or do. The mental conundrum Fox found himself in was beyond exasperating. Sighing, Fox shook his head, then glanced at the flimsi note he held. Once more, he read the delicately written script.

To: Commander Fox of the Coruscant Guard

Dear Sir,

I’m sure this package and its contents might cause alarm and confusion. Please don’t allow it to do either. This is simply a token to express my thanks to the troopers involved with the skirmish in the market district on Level 3 nearly four rotations ago. Their actions saved my life and that of my daughter. When we expressed our gratitude, my daughter felt the shock trooper didn’t think we were sincere. Hence, this small gift. I ask that you please see to it that the troopers involved receive this token and understand how grateful we were for their timely arrival. For there are citizens on this planet who are aware of the services the Guard provides to ensure our continued safety and peace. Thank you for your help in this matter.

Sincerely,

Arissa Blunt

Fox knew without looking it up what skirmish Ms. Blunt referred to, as well as the troopers involved. Reach’s report had made mention of the two citizens he’d pulled away from the fire fight, a young woman and child. Interestingly enough, Fox had also heard through the guard barrack’s grapevine that Reach spent most of that night crowing about a civvie thanking him and how pretty she’d been. According to Reach, her body was a man’s wet dream.

At the time Fox had scoffed and pushed the matter out of his mind. He had far more important matters to contend with than one of his trooper’s infatuations. All of the men would have one at some point or other. It was a natural result with overexposure to civilians after a lifetime of social isolation. Fox was one of the few he knew to never fall to such an affliction. That didn’t mean he hadn’t dabbled and explored his options. The commander had simply never experienced the magic of someone capturing his attention for more than a moment of a little physical pleasure. Until now.

Commander Fox was intrigued, all because of a box of homemade ginger spice cookies, a short note, and an infatuated trooper’s embellished description. Again, Fox sighed. Maker, he needed a drink. And it wasn’t even 1200 yet.

He commed Captain Stone, the squad leader there on the day in question.

“This is Stone,” came the greeting.

“Captain, round up the troopers involved in the skirmish on Level 3, I’m sure you remember the one,” Fox instructed. “They’ve got a gift waiting for them in my office. Apparently Reach’s story wasn’t completely fabricated.”

There was a beat of stunned silence. It was brief, but Fox knew it for what it was. Shock. “Right away, sir,” Stone replied.

Fox disconnected, then turned to inspect the baked goods still sitting on his desk. Ginger spice cookies. Homemade, no less. Damn, they smelled good.

Fox smirked. What the men didn’t know wouldn’t hurt them. He plucked one cookie from the pile, taking a small bite to test the flavor. A groan of delight broke past his lips. This was one of the best frekkin’ things he’d ever had the pleasure of eating, and that's saying something. After all, the position of Commander of the Coruscant Guard afforded certain luxuries and privileges that few other clones were allowed.

The commander took another bite, savoring the taste. What he wouldn’t give to have something this good to eat every day. His eyes found the note again, sitting on his desk in stark contrast to everything else. Arissa Blunt. One has to wonder what kind of woman she was. Fox had every intention of finding out.

-----

After giving the boys their gift (the looks of shock and delight on their faces had caused a grin on his), Fox decided to investigate. It took little effort to find the information he needed. Another perk to his position.

Arissa Blunt, single human female aged 22 standard years. Currently a member of the Republic military’s research and development division located here on base. His brows had raised at that. He merely needed to leave his office and walk across the facility in order to find her. Her focus was prototype military-grade weapons. So, she worked on creating better ways for his brothers on the front to do their job. While he didn’t know her, Fox felt a swell of appreciation for this woman.

He was shocked and intrigued to find she held her position with no formal training. Instead, Ms. Blunt came into the program through the recommendation of a member of the board. It was highly irregular. Perhaps some nepotism was involved? But that made no sense either. According to her file, Ms. Blunt had no living relatives, only a young daughter named Gemma. Cute name, he’d thought.

Out of curiosity, Fox looked her up too. Gemma Blunt, single human female aged 5 standard years. Currently enrolled on scholarship at a school for gifted young children located noooo in a more well-to-do area of the upper levels. So, the kid was smart.

A part of Fox was impressed. And even more intrigued, especially as he gazed at Ms. Blunt’s photo. Reach hadn’t exaggerated, she was quite pretty. Not in the glamour model sort of way. But you could see the potential lying underneath her cute veneer should she ever try to be one. And those eyes….well, they’d surprised him too. Most humans didn’t have violet colored eyes, at least not naturally. But on her they were stunning. They drew you in and spoke volumes. As if the secrets they held were more than just her own. She could know yours without you evening realizing. A fanciful thought perhaps, but there all the same.

And that is why Commander Fox found himself making the long trek to the R&D division on base a few hours later. Amazingly, he had an hour free. Plenty of time to pay Ms. Blunt a visit. He could convey the men’s appreciation and slake his curiosity.

He’d found a technician by the name of A’tron Rogers when he arrived. The man had the audacity to scoff at him when he stated who he was looking for. Fox wisely kept his helmet on, knowing full well what kind of person he was dealing with. It was rather obvious what Mr. Rogers thought of clones and about doing anything for them. One had to wonder why he was in a position that required him to help create weapons that helped said clones.

“Yeah, she’s back here,” he’d snapped. “Follow me.”

Resisting the urge to call the man on his insubordination, Fox followed. They made their way further back into the lab and came to a stop at what looked to be some kind of long range canon. However, the weapon wasn’t what caught Fox’s attention.

Fox froze, his brain gone blank. Before his eyes, bent over at just the right angle, was perhaps the most perfectly shaped ass he’d ever seen. His mouth watered while his blood rushed south. Mentally, he cursed. This was not a good way to start an introduction.

“Blunt!” Rogers practically screeched, trying to get the technician's attention. It certainly did the trick, albeit in a painful way. Arissa’s head shot up, caught by surprise, only to have it collide with the paneling of the prototype she’d been working on. A string of low muttered curses followed the loud clang. Fox winced in sympathy.

After a moment or two, Arissa straightened, seemed to take a steadying breath, then turned to face them. Her eyes widened for a fraction of a second when they landed on him. However, she recovered quickly, her face becoming unreadable as she turned to her coworker.

Fox wished he could say the same. That beautiful shebs he’d been staring at not long ago should have warned him at what else he’d see. Because, by the maker, Reach hadn’t exaggerated. Not one bit. Arissa Blunt truly was a man’s wet dream. Her hair was up and covered, but he didn’t need to see the dark brown wavy locks again to know how it finished the masterpiece that stood before him. Even wearing coveralls covered in grease splotches couldn’t detract from that hourglass figure or the small waist. And her breasts. By Fett, they were a handful and more. So much more. Again, Fox was grateful he’d chosen to keep his bucket on. He’d have looked like a gaping fool otherwise.

Arissa addressed Rogers, her voice even and devoid of emotion. “Did you need something, Rogers?”

The shorter man huffed, obviously put out by her lack of response to him. Fox made a mental note of that. Maybe it wasn’t just clones the man had a problem with. “You’ve got a visitor. Commander Fox here needs to speak with you.”

The technician’s gaze swung over to him, that violet gaze holding him captive. Again, he noticed a moment of trepidation, as if she feared his presence. Fox scowled, annoyance flaring. Her reaction was classic for a citizen. They either looked at him and his brothers with fear or disdain. He wasn’t sure which pissed him off more.

“I see,” she replied. “Well, I’m due a fifteen anyway. If you need me, we’ll be in the conference room.”

Rogers snorted, then left. Yup, that chakaaryc really didn’t like Arissa Blunt. Fox focused his attention on the woman before him. As he looked closer, her nerves became more obvious. What did she have to be nervous about?

“Ms. Blunt,” he greeted, his voice stiff and formal.

“Commander Fox,” she greeted in return. Grabbing a rag, she wiped her hands off, then motioned for him to follow her. “Whatever you need to tell me, it’d be best said in the conference room. Otherwise, everyone else in the department will know about it before the end of the day. You wouldn’t think it, but the lot here are as bad as a bunch of gossiping housewives.”

Nodding, he followed. As they left the lab and made their way down the hallway, Fox couldn’t help his eyes from looking. The sway of those hips were going to haunt him. Another curse ran through his mind.

Soon enough they reached their destination, Arissa gesturing him inside. He took up a position further in, standing at attention while he waited for her to shut the door.

“Would you rather sit, Commander?”

“No thank you, miss. But please don’t stand on my account. Have a seat.”

He patiently waited while Arissa got comfortable. Once she seemed settled, he dove right in. “I assume you know why I’m here?”

That flash of trepidation was back. It was gone immediately, but still, he saw it.

“I think so,” she quietly answered. Her tongue came out to wet her lips. Despite himself, Fox felt a knee jerk reaction to the tiny movement. Maker, this needed to stop. Now.  

“Then explain yourself,” he ordered.

That got her attention. Arissa straightened, her brows furrowed in confusion. “Explain myself? I thought the note I left was pretty self-explanatory.”

“Perhaps,” he hedged. “However, your reaction to my appearance here would say otherwise. I thought you appreciated what the guard does for the citizens of Coruscant. Someone who is appreciative doesn’t respond with fear in their eyes.”

Arissa’s eyes widened, first in shock, then in anger. However, when she next spoke, her voice remained even. “From my point of view, your sudden appearance here is rather suspect. Troopers, let alone commanders, don’t make random visits to this part of the base. Any fear you saw was my worry that I’d done something wrong.”

That made Fox pause, considering. Her words in the note had sounded sincere. And someone who feared or hated clones wouldn't have sent something in the first place, not without it having some sort of repercussion. Perhaps she had a point. Finally, Fox relaxed his stance.

“I suppose your reaction would make sense then,” he conceded. “I apologize for alarming you, Ms. Blunt.”

She shrugged. “Don’t worry about it, you couldn’t have known. I’m sorry I gave you the impression I was like all those ungrateful idiots out there.”

Fox stared at her. Well, that was certainly one way of putting it. Apparently Ms.Blunt lived up to her name. He cleared his throat. “Now that that’s settled, would you mind explaining to me why you felt the need to do such a thing?”

Arissa started fiddling with a loose thread of her coveralls. A nervous tick. “I already told you in the note I sent with the package. My daughter thought the trooper who helped us didn’t believe we meant what we said. I was helping to make him see otherwise.”

A scoff escaped him. “Forgive my own cynicism then. I’m used to people having ulterior motives. It’s my job to find them.” He shrugged. “So, it’s a little hard to believe there wasn’t something else behind your actions, appreciated as they are.”

While he knew he was being something of a di’kut, Fox needed to know. He wasn’t lying. Any civilian he’d ever met had some sort of ulterior motive, most often to the detriment of his men.

She didn’t speak for a while, sitting there in quiet contemplation. Then, those violet orbs caught the gaze of his visor and held it. She wanted to get this right, he realized. She wanted him to believe her. “Maybe because men who didn’t have a choice in choosing this life deserve something good once in a while.”

Speechless, that’s what he was. She said it so plainly and without artifice. Fox knew she meant it, every word.

“I see,” he replied, voice quiet and low. “Well, allow me to express my gratitude and that of my men. It may not seem like much, but those sweets were the first gift any of those men have ever received. It might be the only one.”

“You’re very welcome, Commander Fox.” Her voice was quiet too, her eyes soft and understanding. How Fox wished he could get lost in them for more than just a few minutes. It was time to go. Now.

“You’ll excuse me then, Ms. Blunt, for taking up your time. Thank you for seeing me on such short notice. I’ll see myself out.” Fox made to do just that, not leaving her a chance to say anything in return. He was almost to the door when-----

“Commander, could I ask a favor?”

Fox stopped, then looked over his shoulder. Here it comes. “What is it?”

Arissa gulped, her nerves showing once more. Fox smirked. Already in such a short amount of time, Fox knew he’d enjoy setting her on edge on a regular basis. It was a shame their paths likely wouldn’t cross again.

“I know this may seem silly, but would you be willing to write a short note to my daughter? I know it’d mean the world to her to hear how much the troopers that helped us enjoyed the cookies.”

“Can’t you just tell her?”

“I could,” she allowed. “But she might think I’m lying. Sometimes she has a hard time believing things if she doesn’t have evidence. Finding out you came to tell me yourself just how much the gift was appreciated will be suspect without some kind of proof.”

“Is your daughter really that cynical?”

Arissa laughed, shaking her head. Fox had to admit she had a lovely laugh. Fett, he was going soft. “No, not cynical, commander. Just a child who needs encouragement that something is real when she’s had so many other disappointments.”

While Fox was curious as to what she meant by that statement, he didn’t ask. Honestly, what was the harm in writing the kid something? There was none. Besides, he was more than happy to do it.

“Well, I’d hate to disappoint.”

The smile she gave him made an answering one pull at his lips. Thankfully, his helmet hid the sight. Yeah, this was definitely not good.

------

“Mommy! You’re home!” Gemma squealed in happiness as Arissa stepped through the door. Arissa was barely inside before her five-year-old daughter wrapped her tiny arms around her torso and squeezed.

Arissa paused, soaking the moment in. A smile pulled at her lips while the hint of tears teased her eyes. This right here made everything worth it. The ridiculously long days. The demeaning remarks and catty behavior from her coworkers. This was her why, the reason she kept putting up with everything.

She wrapped her arms around Gemma and squeezed back. “Hello to you too, Gemma. Did you miss me?”

“Yes!” Gemma pulled back, her strawberry blonde curls bouncing in her excitement. “Did you miss me?”

Arissa chuckled, ruffling her daughter’s hair. “Yes, sweetie.”

“Welcome home, Arissa. Long day?”

Arissa glanced up, making eye contact with the teenager lounging on the lumpy pale green couch in the apartment space that served as a living room. She barely withheld a grimace, thinking back over her day. “Just the usual, Trix.”

Although it really hadn’t been. Not when a certain unsettling clone commander decided to pop in and pay an unexpected visit. Gods, she’d thought for a moment there she’d done something wrong, that somehow the gift Gemma had practically begged her to make was illegal. Panic had filled Arissa, assuming the worst. But then he’d thanked her. Thanked her. Like a box of ginger spice cookies was the best gift his men had ever received. That wasn’t really too far off the mark, though, was it? And that black visor. When he’d held her gaze, Arissa had felt as if she were naked. She couldn’t remember anyone ever making her fell that way. Definitely not something one wants to feel upon meeting a commanding officer of the GAR. 

Shaking her head, Arissa focused back in on the present. “Did the two of you eat yet?”

Trix suddenly appeared uncomfortable, a look of guilt flashing in her eyes. “Yeah, we did. I, um, thought it’d be nice to treat Gemma to something. We went to Dex’s Diner and had the works. Saved some for you, too.”

While she knew why Trix might feel guilty, Arissa couldn’t fault the teenager for spending the money instead of eating the leftovers in the fridge. A year of being homeless and dodging traffickers and drug dealers had done a number on Trix. The kid’s useless father had abandoned her just days after her mother passed away. And the lower levels of Coruscant were not kind to the young and innocent. Arissa knew this fact quite well. Trix was finally getting back on her feet, working at a local bakery to make some money while attending school at night to finish her primary education. She lived in the third bedroom and watched Gemma when Arissa had to work late. And Trix positively adored her. So if Trix wanted to spoil Gemma with a night of burgers and shakes, Arissa wasn’t going to complain. She was far too grateful for the help to even think of chastising the teenager for splurging.

“That sounds like a lot of fun. Thanks for thinking of me,” She smiled at Trix, hoping the teenager understood she wasn’t mad. “I can’t remember the last time I had Dex’s. Is it as good as I remember?”

Gemma giggled. “Even better! Oh, and we got to meet Dex. Did you know he’s a besalisk? I’ve never seen one before. He answered all my questions, too. Didn’t act like I was a bother or anything.”

“Of course he wouldn’t. Because he realized right away what a bright and inquisitive mind you have, sweetie.” Arissa’s heart warmed at the kindness the diner owner had unknowingly extended her daughter. Gemma truly was inquisitive, wanting to know anything and everything. And amazingly she remembered it all. However, there were some people who found the girl’s nearly constant questions an annoyance and something to discourage. It was why she’d done so poorly in school until transferring into a private academy. Thank the maker for that scholarship. She bent over and lifted Gemma up, holding the young girl as she made her way to their small kitchen table. “Now spill. How was your day?”

Asking Gemma that question was all the kiddo needed to start regaling her mother with the events of the day. Arissa listened attentively as she went about putting her dinner together. She laughed when Gemma explained how a boy in her class had water come out of his nose during lunch and praised her when told how she’d received perfect marks on yesterday’s exam. Trix stayed with them for a while, interjecting comments here and there before retreating to her room to start on her school work. They wished the sixteen-year-old good night as mother and daughter both knew they likely wouldn’t see the teenager again until morning. Arissa was done with her dinner and working on a mostly thawed nerf milkshake by the time Gemma asked how her day went.

Arissa had thought long and hard how she wanted to present her surprise. She pulled the note from her back pocket and slid it across the table’s surface. “I had an unexpected visitor today. He asked me to give you this.”

Curious, Gemma carefully unfolded the note. Even at such a young age she handled everything with a great deal of care. Violet eyes scanned the note, then widened in shock. When Gemma finally looked back up she was smiling from ear to ear. “He wrote a note. He really wrote a thank you note!”

The smile breaking across Arissa’s face almost hurt. Seeing her daughter’s happiness at something so small was beyond precious. Mentally, she filed the image away to remember when the moody teenager years hit. “I was told not to read it. That it was top secret until your eyes saw what was inside. Think you could read it to me?”

Gemma nodded enthusiastically.

“It says: Dear Miss Gemma. Thank you for the lovely gift of ginger spiced cookies. I have shared your present with the troopers involved in the skirmish four rotations ago in the market. They were very surprised and grateful for your thoughtfulness. They rarely get a thank you for their work. Your mother tells me you are a bright student and love to learn new things. Did you know that members of the guard love uj cake? I highly recommend trying it. Please continue to do your part as a good and loyal citizen of the Republic.

Sincerely,

Commander Fox of the Coruscant Guard.”

The excitement radiating off of Gemma was contagious. She truly was happy from Commander Fox’s words. Arissa sent a silent thank you to the commander for taking the time to fulfil her request. Maybe she could find a way to let him know how much his note meant. But he must be very busy. Why would he care about any of this?

If he didn’t care, why would he bother in the first place? He could have said no.

“Do you think I could write a reply, mommy?” Gemma asked. “Maybe we could make them some uj cake since they like it so much and leave a note with it like before.”

That made Arissa pause. “Perhaps. But don’t you think the rest of the guard might get jealous when only a few of them get to have some?”

Gemma’s brow furrowed as she contemplated that possibility. “I guess you’re right. I know I wouldn’t like it if only a few of my classmates kept getting something and I didn’t.” Then her face brightened. “Maybe we could make some for everyone! That way no one felt left out. Oh but,” Gemma frowned as she realized something. “That wouldn’t work either. There’s so many of them, aren't there?”

Arissa hmmed, feeling her heart squeeze with regret as her daughter’s face fell. For someone so young, she truly had a compassionate and giving nature. She wanted everyone to be happy. “I’m not sure how many there are, but yes, there are a lot of men in the guard. Far too many for us to make enough for everyone. I’m sorry sweetie.”

The evening wore on, the hours passing as the world outside transitioned from day to night. Despite her disappointment, Gemma managed to recover. They played a few games, took care of Gemma’s bath, and cuddled on the couch to watch a silly holomovie before Arissa announced it was time for bed. Arissa read a story of her daughter’s choosing, sang her a song, and kissed her good night. Once Arissa left the room, she’d make a cup of tea and curl up on the couch with a book, losing herself in the passionate romance of her current novel before heading to bed as well. It was like so many other night’s, this ritual their evenings had become. But tonight would be different.

“Mommy?”

Arissa paused, turning back to face her daughter. Only the top of her head and her eyes were visible above the fuzzy purple comforter she’d cocooned into. “What is it, sweetie?”

“Will you please tell Commander Fox thank you for writing me that note? I really did like it. And I think he’d like to know that, too.”

The breath whooshed out of Arissa’s lungs. She hadn’t expected this. But how could she refuse? “Of course, Gemma. I’ll tell him tomorrow. Now, get some sleep. You have a big day at school in the morning.”

“Can you make rainbow berry pancakes for breakfast?”

Arissa couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped, Gemma’s tone was just too hopeful. “I think I can manage that. Now, sleep little one.”

Gemma giggled, happy at her mother’s answer. “Okay, okay. Good night, Mommy. I love you.”

“I love you too, Gemma.”

Arissa closed the door and made her way to the kitchen. She tinkered around the small space, getting things ready for the morning while her tea water boiled, then steeped. Once finished, she grabbed the old and worn romance novel off her caf table, the flimsi pages yellowed with age. She happily made herself comfortable on the couch as she dove into the world of high passion…..

Five minutes later, Arissa was back in the kitchen, a notepad open to a clean page while her holopad came to life. She scrubbed a hand over her face, sighing. “I can’t believe I’m actually doing this.” As soon as the piece of technology was up and running, she began bringing up Republic military records, trying to get an accurate head count of how many men filled the ranks of the Coruscant Guard.

------

Now, while Arissa was toiling away at the kitchen table trying to work out a plan to fulfill her daughter’s wish, said daughter was busy working on another matter instead of sleeping.

Gemma waited for her holopad to boot up, reading the note from Commander Fox almost obsessively. She’d never thought in a million years her mother would come home with any kind of news about the gift she’d begged her to make. Instead, she’d brought home a note. A note! Gemma very quietly giggled, pressing her face into her pillow to better muffle the noise. She was in the next star system from how happy that little piece of flimsi had made her. The five-year-old sent a desperate plea to the gods, asking them for the chance to meet this Commander Fox. Yes, she’d asked her mom to thank him, but she wanted the chance to tell him herself how much his note meant to her. And she wanted to show him just how much she could learn when she set her mind to it.  

Finally the holopad came on and Gemma brought up a search engine. Adults were always so surprised when they saw how well she could navigate tech at her age. For whatever reason, it was astonishing. Gemma didn’t pretend to understand why. Carefully, she typed in uj cake, then hit search. She skimmed over a promising article. It did sound rather yummy. Perhaps she could convince her mom to help her make some after school tomorrow and she could share it with the class. The kids would probably like that. Maybe it’d help her make a few friends.

The article said the recipe came from Mandalore. Intrigued, Gemma decided to search the planet, not knowing what she was getting herself into. What she read fascinated her. Hours went by and Gemma refused to sleep, far too invested in learning more about this old creed of warriors. She had only nodded off when her mother came to wake her, far earlier than usual.

Gemma’s groggy eyes met her mother’s. “What is it, mommy? Is something wrong?”

Arissa shook her head, a hint of mischief lighting her eyes. “No, sweetie. I just needed your help with something. How would you like to help me make some uj cake this morning? I think a certain clone commander would appreciate it.”

It took a moment for Gemma’s sleepy brain to understand exactly what her mother was saying. When she did, she shot out of bed so fast she almost knocked her mother over. Excitement took care of the exhaustion she’d felt just moments ago.

“Yes!” she exclaimed, then dashed out the door to the kitchen, her mother’s laughter following after her.

What neither realized then was how their actions that morning would come to shape the rest of their lives.....and those throughout the galaxy.

[codenamesazanka]

A meta about Dabi! I surprise myself; but HUGE DISCLAIMER: Dabi is still not a favorite character at all, and I am biased as hell. This is my interpretation of events. I will not be reading his behavior as if he is without doubt Touya Todoroki - that’s not at all confirmed - and so I will be less sympathetic due to not coming from that perspective. Also, extremely long meta. 

First up: I’ll take Dabi for his word that he doesn’t gave a crap about the League. 

I’m not saying he absolutely does not have a single milligram of care for the League - he does seem to rely on and intend for them to provide support for his goal; but he’s very much detached from everyone else, and haven’t demonstrated much empathy for any member of the League. Not quite part of the ‘Found Family’. 

It’s very possible that he could be lying, trying look tough in front of the Hero. 

But the evidence from the past chapters kinda shows that he means his words. Here’s him burning away Twice clones and barely avoid hitting Real!Twice:

“He never actually hit Twice,” “He had no choice cuz Hawks was right there,’ ‘He knew those aren’t the real Twice, and what do you expect? He’s a villain, and he expects his teammates to take care of themselves.”(*1)

All fair! Still, I’ll say this attack is pretty careless; and moreover, it took away some of their much needed manpower. Two Twice clones could’ve created four more Twices and so on; and at the very least might have interfered with Hawks targeting the real Twice. 

And here’s him attacking Hawks in a way that would’ve burned Twice badly. 

Images are out of order, my apologies, but these panels show that 1) Dabi had really intended to hit Hawks (and Twice), what with him being shocked that Hawks had been able to evade the attack; 2) Dabi’s fire output was very strong, and so 3) as Hawks points out, he nearly burned up Twice. 

Even if he thought that Hawks would protect Twice, that’s still quite a risky move that would’ve badly injure a fellow League Member. 

Here’s a comparison of Dabi and Mr. Compress during the battle in Deika:

In the first image, after Mr. Compress ask for help, Dabi dismisses him. Sure, he does point out the Twice clones shortly after, but it cold enough that Mr. Compress even asks, ‘Are you so unfeeling?!’. 

Meanwhile, when it’s Dabi in danger, Mr. Compress is concerned for him, wishes to help, and yeah, that ‘Poor Dabi!’ 

All throughout My Villain Academia, he’s been pretty rude and aloof from everyone:

Refusing to help fight Gigantomachia (to go recruit a Hero that he never trusted in the first place) when everyone is ready to eat cold dirt for a month and a half with Shigaraki. 

And:

Dismissing everyone’s effort, and insulting them. 

In fact, in comparison to everyone else in the League, Dabi is really lacking. We all know Twice is a total sweetheart who would do anything for the League; Spinner is canonically in love with Shigaraki explicitly stated that his goal is to help Shigaraki realize his vision (Chapter 233). Toga showed her care for Twice during the Overhaul mess (Chapter 148). And Mr. Compress, again, was worried for Dabi (Chapter 230), wanted the Doc to help Shigaraki (238), and is in general genial towards his teammates. 

I think, overall, narratively in both writing and visuals, Dabi is written to be rather unlikeable to the reader (or at least neutral). 

My Villain Academia is the arc where the League are the protagonists, the Point-of-View characters: we hear their thoughts, and we learn their backstories.

A huge messy image! I’m sorry! But from the silly faces, to the little actions (Mr. Compress whispering, complete with ‘psst psst’), to the asides (Mr Compress, again, “Where did you pull that phone out of?”), these give us a bit of funny moments that kinda endears the League to us. (Even Giran gets a moment or two.)

Not quite Dabi though. We get a glimpse of his thoughts at the beginning of Chapter 228 when he encounters Geten, we have some interactions with Twice that are humorous (though it’s Twice carrying out the majority of it), and... that’s it. 

“What about Mr. Compress? We got no backstory.”; “What about Toga? We don’t really hear her thoughts either?” Yes to all those points, but these were made up for: as shown above, Mr. Compress having those little moments; and Toga, who already demonstrated her care for Twice in the Overhaul Arc, and we’re reminded of that directly when Twice brings out the handkerchief she gave him. 

There, of course, is that moment that he goes to attack Hawks and help Twice in Chapters 264-266. Good of him, right? Heroic, even. 

Except that 'rescue’ doesn’t really give it a feeling of ‘The Calvary Has Arrived!’. IMO. For one thing, he almost burned Twice. For another, the reaction from Twice is more desperate than relief or joy. Compare with Toga and Mr. Compress’s clear utter joy at being saved by Twice. 

(And no could forget those amazing spreads of Twice overcoming his trauma and unleashing Sad Man’s Parade? Those evokes such a feeling of “THE CALVARY IS HERE”, omg. Dabi’s flame entrance is not quite. *To me* )

I would even go as far to say as Dabi is being portrayed as a possible “third party” antagonist. 

Yes, the League are already the main antagonists in the overall story, but they’re quite sympathetic-- Dabi, in relation to the League, although being a member, is the odd one out in many aspects. 

I think the recent chapters with Twice and Hawks and Dabi illustrates this really well-- Because we go from [Twice vs Hawks] with Hawks as the POV ‘bad guy’; and now we have [Hawks vs Dabi], Dabi as the bad guy. The story writing and the art shifts immediately to portray that, aimed at directing our empathy, at the character Horikoshi wants us to root for. 

In Chapter 264 and 265, no doubt we’re to root for Twice. All those flashbacks! Him cowering on the ground. His heart breaking because he trusted Hawks. We feel for him. And so Hawks is portrayed as the ‘Villain’-- but not completely. 

For Hawks, we go from dark and menacing, him being looming and scary...then immediately move to seeing Hawks expression of remorse. Horikoshi wants us to understand Hawks is conflicted. And he’s not doing this for fun. And finally, they’re shown as equals in the fight: Twice and Hawk’s faces aligned at even levels. 

Chapter 266, we finally have the three together. Most definitely, Dabi is on Twice’s side - but like I said, it’s not actually showing Dabi as a reliable backup. 

Then we get to Chapter 267. We first start off with that cute image if the Fataxi. It’s adorable. Then Tokoyami notices the flames, the flying, putting two and two together. This positions them as sorta the main focus. We’re back in the Heroes’ POV. 

Moving onto the fight, I do sense anger from Dabi: the flames, the stomping, the stomping flames. But it’s more portrayed as manic, sadistic anger, instead of grief, vengeful anger. And that smile! 

It’s a true villain smile. The stretching of the corners of the mouth, and the way the eyes are curved. Joyful smiles tightens up the eyes. And sure, you can have a contradictory smile while angry and in grief, a grimace, but there’s other things to cue at that - tears, sweat drops, the eyes again - usually big and triangular. 

Do I think it’s possible he’s smiling contradictory? That he’s feeling real sadness and anger at Twice’s death? Yeah, it’s possible. But it’s also possible he isn’t - and I feel that’s the more likely option, given all he says about Twice being useful and about Stain’s philosophy (*remember Stain didn’t like Shigaraki! he didn’t like Villains either. He was going to purge the world of both.) 

Anyways, Hawks is right there, on the ground, trying to shield himself. It’s a pitiful look. He’s clearly drawn as the victim we’re to emphasize with, because this doesn’t look like a fight between equals. Just one guy playing with the other, having the ability to incinerate him immediately, but dragging it out.

(True, Dabi’s a villain, and-- “Didn’t Shigaraki do the same thing? With Overhaul? Dude chopped off limbs and laughed.” Yes! Absolutely. But Chapter 160 was from the League’s POV, and everything about it was to position the League as winners, badasses, ‘The Next’.)

(My god, we even get a Baby Hawks flashback for us to fawn over.) 

Here, it’s Hawk’s POV and Dabi is full Villain imagery. Hawks has to looking up from a protective pose - at a very menacing Dabi, looming over, stepping on him. The panels with the outside fighting and the city, linked with Dabi smiling - that’s classic {‘I’m going to target and hurt the world’ evil mastermind monologue, insert evil laughter}. 

Once Tokoyami enters the scene, there’s no more argument. A likeable Hero student? Arriving to protect his mentor? He’s the clear Hero we’re to cheer for, against Dabi, (who we never even get to bond with during MVA... unlike Twice). 

All in All, Dabi rejects the Heroes... and he also rejects the League. 

The thing that confuses me most about this whole arc so far is “Why the fuck did Dabi recruit Hawks?” He said he knew Hawks was lying from the start, but he still let a Hero into the club. Moreover, if Dabi noticed and knew enough to guess where Twice and Hawks is the moment the Hero attack started; if he knew enough to even think “This isn’t your fault, Twice,” then why didn’t Dabi do anything sooner?

We don’t know his specific goal yet. Did Hawks factor into it in an important way? He’s willing to kill Hawks right now. It could be that Hawks, by now, is more dangerous than he is worth as a trap for the heroes, say, so it’s time to cut some losses. 

But Hawks had pretty much only brought bad luck for Villains: Made Endeavor look good; found out about the MLA and discovered their plot; discovered the hospital; set up this attack. None of it furthers Dabi’s stated goal to Kill All Heroes, and none of it helps the League either.

Until we get his gameplan, I can honestly regard him as dumb. What is this series of events???

(Even if the other League Members were to be dumb and fuck up like Dabi, we know they did it with good intentions for Shigaraki, for the League. 

Toga, doing risky things: Literally said, “I’m sure [retrieving Deku’s blood, betraying the Hassaikai] will make Tomura happy.” 

Twice, the sweetheart: recruited Overhaul cuz he thought he was a good guy. Befriended Hawks because he thought Hawks believed in the cause.  

Mr. Compress: Kinda ruined the ‘kidnap Bakugou’ thing; but since then he hasn’t done anything. And we’re sure of his sincerity because: Lost an arm, still stayed with the League, fought for a month+ with a broken prosthetic.

Spinner: Was a Stain fanboy, but has stopped.) 

“This isn’t your fault, Twice,” and it’s true. It’s not Twice’s fault at all. It’s Dabi’s. The blame has to be on Dabi. 

-

So. Dabi. Looking more and more to be on neither side, and now having wronged both. What’s gonna happen to him? 

Not sure, but I’ve got a theory he might actually be killed by Shigaraki, to develop Shigaraki and the League. But that’s for another post. 

-

(*1) “...what do you expect? He’s a villain, and he expects his teammates to take care of themselves.” Also true. And I am aware that Shigaraki did the same thing when he decayed that tower no knowing whether Giran got rescued yet or not, so there was some callousness there. But consider: one guy had been so sleep-deprived for one and a half months that he had hallucinated slightly and was wobbling with each movement; and the other has not. 

-

All this is my opinion and impressions. Sorry if it’s unclear at points. Thanks for reading!!!!! And thank you so much to friends that helped me brainstorm and discuss this! Your contributions are invaluable. 

[inkribbon796]

Like a House of Cards Ch. 3: The Traitors Among Us

Summary: Two of the Suits’ identity victims need to escape to help their friends.

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13

. . . plink . . . clank . . .

When Ethan had awoken after being kidnapped he felt panic, but over the course of a couple hours that had turned to anger. He’d been kidnapped, he didn’t know where his dog was and he was sure nothing good could come from the situation.

. . . plick . . . clank . . .

He had to get out while he had the chance. There was a faint sound in the distance. Ethan had tried calling to the sound but he didn’t get a response. Ethan had tried the door to the cell he was in but it was magically locked and he couldn’t get out.

While he was trying to fiddle with the lock, he blinked and someone was standing in front of him. Ethan was afraid his hand would have gotten hit or shot, but he realized it was just the Host.

“Host, I thought I was fucked,” Ethan sighed in relief and stood up. “Did they drag you in here too?”

“No, the Host merely came to assist where he could,” the Host answered and with his narrations the lock disengaged and disappeared from existence into a puff of aura. “He does delight in telling Crank that he was only in emotional danger, not in physical danger.”

“Thanks, but I’m sure the cage counts as physical danger as well,” Ethan chuckled, in better spirits than a couple seconds ago. “Wanna help bust some heads in?”

The Seer’s head tilted a little. “The Host must not intervene too much, but he does have some information to pass along, some information that Crank will enjoy hearing, and others that he will not.”

“Alright,” Ethan complied, a touch nervous.

“Excellent,” the Host smiled and with a few careful words Ethan’s superhero outfit and mask were carefully folded into a neat little pile in his hands. “First, Crank must not put on his mask until he and Chase leave this base.”

“Ehh, alright,” Ethan agreed and changed into his outfit, mask in hands. “Okay, what now?”

“On the wall behind the Host is a hidden panel that leads to a hallway,” the Host explains. “As Crank comes up to the panel it will flip open and it will prompt Crank to speak a passcode which is the word sunrise.”

“Su—” Ethan began to repeat to show he understood.

“Crank must not speak it until he is at the panel,” the Host interrupted sharply. “The AI that Spade has hooked up to the base is rudimentary but very effective. Crank must be sure and confident when he speaks with it, and it will let Crank access its features. Is the Host understood?”

“Yes,” Ethan nodded.

“Good, the Host is glad to help,” Host smiled. “Now, and this will be the part that Crank will not like hearing, but there will be three doors along the hallway that Crank and the AI will walk into. The first door to the right contains all of the heroes’ and villains’ various pets that have been stolen over the course of a couple hours.”

“Spencer!” Ethan gasped, already moving to push past the Host but he ran into a magical barrier that stopped him.

The Host’s aura grabbed Ethan. “Listen, Crank, it is imperative that the AI does not know that he is Crank. To do that Crank must walk past the door, he cannot even look at the door. The Host can magically enchant it so that the Suits cannot enter it if that makes Crank feel better. Crank must listen or he will jeopardize the safety of countless people.”

“Is he safe?” Ethan asked.

“Yes,” the Host nodded. “He is not hungry or hurt, and will continue to be safe if Crank will follow the Host’s instructions.”

“Alright,” Ethan took a deep breath and nodded, “okay.”

“Good,” the Host relaxed. “Now, the door at the end of the hallway is holding Chase. You will order the AI to free Chase and unlock the door, whatever reasoning the AI gives for him being in there, agree with it and then go through the final door. The AI will not follow you into the room. He cannot hear you in that room. There will be a generator and a glass case. Take the three items in the case but do not release the souls inside of the case and take the generator with you when you leave through the elevator. Do not call for the AI’s assistance, Chase’s costume will be waiting for him in the base.”

“Okay,” Ethan nodded and when he blinked the Host was gone. “Okay.”

First thing’s first he had to leave and find Chase, which was a great idea because he didn’t want to be alone in an enemy base. So Crank walked up to the wall and just like the Host predicted a white panel rolled down out of the wall and Ethan said without waiting to be prompted, “Sunrise.”

The panel lit up with cyan blue light and it said, “Access Granted.”

That was Captain Morality’s voice!

The door opened and Ethan looked around for Patton but didn’t see him. Ethan already started walking. Immediately he saw there was a short hallway with three doors and immediately to his right was the door Host had warned him about.

He took two steps forward, chanting at himself to ignore the door, and on the second step Patton materialized out of pixels. He was all smiles and not in a mask.

“Hey, Eef,” Patton smiled as Ethan started internally freaking out.

“Hey,” Ethan cursed himself for not knowing the Captain’s real name. He had heard it once or twice but it escaped him completely. “How’s it going?”

“Oh, you know,” Patton smiled. “Big day and all. I’m all excited.”

“Oh yeah,” Ethan smiled, trying to act like he knew what the hell was going on. “Just gonna grab A— uh, Chase. He got himself shut up in the other room.”

Patton frowned, looking confused before a lightbulb literally popped up over his head, “Ohh, that makes since. Did he get angry at Lo again? Silly. It’s a big mission day.”

With that the door at the end of the hallway opened as Ethan opened up the door to what looked like a workshop.

“Alrighty,” Patton smiled, entirely too chipper. “I’ll wait for the signal, just tell me when Lo’s ready for the transistor.”

“I’ll bring it to him,” Ethan told Patton, motioning to Chase to follow him, “just bring it into the workshop.”

Patton made a giddy squeal, clapping his hands, “Yay, right away.”

Then he was gone, and Ethan was left with Chase watching him cautiously. So the young hero was left trying to play charades with his eyes, “Come on, Chase, time for the mission, let’s go.”

Chase finally followed Ethan into the room and the instant Ethan closed the door, Chase had him pinned by the neck to the wall.

“Hey! Woah! Woah!” Ethan held up his hands. “I don’t know what’s going on.”

“I saw yeh[1] with them,” Chase accused angrily. “Where are we?”

“I don’t know, the Host just told me to find you,” Ethan was practically stumbling over his words. “What do you want?”

“How did Robbie die?” Chase demanded.

“I left him and Wil killed him,” Ethan admitted.

Chase eased up off of him as the two looked around the workshop. Everything looked back up next to a huge folded up bench.

“Are those rockets?” Ethan asked.

“Maybe?” Chase said and looked at a generator that was hooked up to the bench. A screen on the generator read: “Upload 15%”

“Yeh[1] look important,” Chase commented and unplugged it.

The screen flashed blue and then read: “Do you wish to discontinue?” And then it had underneath buttons for: “Yes” and “No” for someone to press.

Naturally Chase pressed “Yes” and Chase grabbed the generator. “Takin’ yeh with.”[2]

Ethan was looking at the glass case that had Deceit’s cane, a metronome, and an octopus belt buckle. Then he opened up the case and grabbed them. “We should go.”

“Yeah,” Chase agreed.

At that the bench folded up into a metallic cub that was about three inches in every direction. An insignia of a light blue heart glowing on it. It was remarkably heavy for something so small.

The two heroes headed for the other door and found it was an elevator. They took the elevator up into a well-furnished, but small, two-floor house. One that was dripping in stuff that seemed like the Duke or Deceit would own.

There was a car in the garage that was the Light Sides’ car and the two heroes found the keys in the kitchen. Then they loaded up the car with the stuff from the workshop.

When they opened the garage door the Host was there waiting for them and backed up so that Chase didn’t hit him.

“Chase should take these,” the Host held out a stack of nineteen playing cards.

“Uhh, thanks,” Chase took them, and as he was placing them in the glove box the Host spoke up again.

“The Dealer thinks that Chase should give those to the Host the next time he sees him,” the Host smiled and when Chase looked back the Seer was gone.

A chill passed through Chase’s body and he quickly rolled up the windshield and left to try and find the nearest road to get back home.

Back in the city the heroes were still fighting the Suit but they had all gotten closer to the dome. Logan’s nanites stripping metal from cars to attack the heroes with, as Google helped defend Bing and himself but was very hesitant to directly attack Logan.

“He’s inorganic,” Google argued.

“Then help me put him in sleep mode!” Bing shouted.

Marvin was helping Jackie fight off J.J and they had yet to even touch him. The imposter Ethan was fighting Bob and Wade in-between the two groups. Several of the other heroes nearby were trying to find the imposter Chase who had disappeared, others were helping in fight.

Which is exactly when the real Chase arrived with the Sides’ car and slammed it right into the imposter Logan who exploded into a cloud of nanites.

Google let out a horrified sound as Chase leaned out of the window.

“Yeh fooker! Yeh can go an’ rot in hell with the rest ‘a the Suit fooks!”[3] Chase shouted as Ethan was already pulling the generator out of the back seat.

“Bing!” Ethan yelled, holding up the generator. “Take it! Take it!”

Logan reformed and looked at the generator and more importantly Ethan with such an inhumane and furious look that Chase got back in the car.

“Uh on, get in Crank, I’m hittin’[4] him again!” Chase yelled and Logan physically shoved the car away. The car crashing into a telephone pole and dazing Chase. In the crash, Deceit’s staff snapped at the hook and it shook with a yellow light and suddenly Janus was sitting in the front seat looking fifteen types of pissed off.

“The fook[5]?” Chase asked, dazed.

The Dark Side looked down at the buckle and metronome. He picked them up and teleported himself out of the car as Logan finished pulling himself together.

“Who are you?” Janus hissed in a rage, his aura pushing Remus out of the buckle and tossing it at the Dark Side’s chest. “Pull your pants up.”

“Ooh, it’s the fake Logan,” Remus smiled in sadistic glee and summoned his mace.

“It would seem so,” Janus ripped the metronome pendulum out and snapped it in half. Orange falling flat on his back. The deceitful Side summoned a new staff as he glared at Logan.

“Get out of my way,” Logan’s body glitched.

Janus’s eyes and features became more serpentine and he actually hissed.

Remus was staring at him, in a mixture of fear and interest, “Well that’s a pleasant thing to wake up to.”

“Not now, darling, just bludgeon him to death,” Janus hissed at Remus.

Logan glitched in anger and was already going for Ethan who was passing the generator over to Bing who quickly extracted a good sized blue solid state drive from it by the handle. The drive let out a frustrated blue glow over and over again but the three charms dangling from a notch in the drive looked normal.

“Don’t you look fancy?” Bing commented and a shrill tone that caused all the Septics, imposter or real, to freeze and cover their ears.

“Put them back!” Logan shouted in rage. “Put them back before you kill them!”

Remus raced over to Bing and Ethan, swinging his mace, “Here let me help.”

“No, we don’t know what it does,” Bing tried to pull the drive out the path of danger.

The magic from Remus’s mace nicked the shield pendant which started glowing an angry red before it snapped into pieces. The red shield pin broke and a flash of red light shot out. Roman tumbled out of the pin, screaming as he tumbled out onto the ground.

“Get away!” Roman panicked.

“No!” Glitch Logan roared. “You’re going back in!”

“You!” Roman frantically pulled his imagination around him, summoning up his sword and shield. Around him a ferocious red dragon stood around him as he stared down Logan. “Give Virgil back, you fiend!”

Bing looked at the drive and the other two charms, before looking over at Roman, “That’s Logan, he’s turning into a demon.”

Janus flinched, glancing at Bing before staring back at Logan and really looking at him.

“That may be a demon,” Roman proclaimed, pointing his sword at the person in question. “But it’s not Logan. My dear nerd may be course of tongue and cold as an ice cream sundae, but he would never be so vile and rough.”

“Eloquent as always, Princey,” Logan smiled, his form glitching.

The dragon roared, Roman clearly furious as well, “Don’t you dare, you do not get to call me that. Cease wearing my lover’s face or I will separate you from it.”

After so long of being still and ominous the dome seemed to ripple and it lunged out, like a long hang, snagging both Roman from the middle of the crowd and the drive right out of Bing’s hands. It dragged both of them into the dome with barely another ripple. The last thing anyone saw before the dome went still again was the Host’s smiling face as he held the drive in his hand and disappeared into the dark aura of the dome.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Accessibility Translations

1. you

2. Taking you with.

3. You fucker! You can go and rot in hell with the rest of the Suit fucks!

4. hiting

5. fucker

[soyouareandrewdobson]

Digging through the archives 1: The ReBoot drama

Hello and welcome to one of the first “subsections” of posts I am going to make on this tumblr for the sake of an easier overview. This one is titlted “Digging through the archives”, because it will always relate to something I will find by literally looking for some of the oldest “opinion” or personal related stuff about Dobson that there is. So think of this here less as me tackling his comics and more of my own version of what the Hypocrisy of Andrew Dobson does.

With that explanation out of the way, lets just briefly talk about Dobson and his idea of fan entitlement; If you have followed Dobson throughout the last year or so, you know he has a very low opinion on fans of the original She-Ra and He-Man, 80s cartoons in general and Star Wars, to the point he thinks the people behind it are all potential alt righters (link red flag comic) or basically man children.

 To anyone who knows Dobson however, it would be no surprise now to learn that he has a tendency to be the same kind of way to other people and creators. Like when he whined to an actual writer on a Frozen related property about the necessity of giving Elsa a girlfriend, which even resulted in Aaron Sparrow being involved at one point, a professional animator and comic writer on the Boom Comics related Darkwing Duck issues. A prime example on how Dobson will literally make himself also unsympathetic to the people he wants to work for/with.

 But then there is what I found in relation to a little animated series by the name of ReBoot and that is really where both his entitlement and egotism kinda shine.

For those unaware: ReBoot was a computer animated adventure show produced by Mainframe Entertainment and ran from 1994 to 2001. It is actually listed as the first fully computer animated cartoon out there and is fondly remembered by a lot of people. Unfortunately, I myself have never watched it so I can’t give a “valid” opinion on it. All I have seen so far are clips on youtube but I will admit that what I have seen in them looks fun and intriguing, even if the animation at parts (especially in season 1 related content) has not aged that well. But hey, early computer animation, that is forgivable. And any media that manages to make an episode that is also in a way a huge tribute to Evil Dead of all things in a children cartoon is a big win for me.

Now, how is ReBoot connected to Dobson? Dobson has been a fan of ReBoot, a fact he made publicly known when in 2007 rumors of a continuation of ReBoot emerged. Something Dobson, again, the man who is pissed about the entitlement of She-Ra fans, has not been very happy about.

But Dobson, what is so wrong about being “different” from the past? After all, let the past die! The original show had terrible artwork! And not everything back in the day was good, right?

 Yeah, it is pretty obvious how his complaining and stands against “modern” fans ring pretty hollow when he himself acted as the entitled brat he thinks critics of new She-Ra and Thundercats Roar are, back in 2007 already. Also I honestly feel that at the very least the creators of that idea gave their fans still more “control” than Rian Johnson did. And we all know how much Star Wars suffered in terms of reputation because of it.

BTW, this webcomic continuation mentioned? It is actually not just a rumor that went nowhere, but one of the most fascinating aspects I found when reading up on ReBoot via Wikipedia. The idea was that of the five potential pitches (so again, there was variety given that even could have been expanded on) people could choose one that would be further adapted. Additionally the people behind the idea were looking for more active input by fans, giving people the chance to apply as artists working on it if they decided to submit samples people could vote on. Something Dobson jumped actually on. And tried to manipulate in his own favor

 The thing that catches my attention at first is how hyperbole Dobson is. Claiming the fate of the show is in their hands and treating voting on this thing like it’s a live or die situation, with pointlessly writing stuff in caps as if we are reading the headline of some trashy newspaper article. It just comes off less as someone who is a fan and more of a fanatic of the show. Second, I just find it hilarious that of all the plattforms online Dobson decided to post that “VERY IMPORTANT” information people should act immediately on, was deviantart. Did he genuinely expect people would flock to what he wrote in order to immediately do something about the vote? Deviantart even back then was mostly for posting fanart, few people read journals and even less people cared for ReBoot. I don’t know if the /co/ board of 4chan existed back in 2007 already, but he would have had more success posting on there and get the information out, than on dA.

 Lastly, the shameless self promotion. Stating he does not care which pitch wins, when only three day prior he whined how they all suck and he wishes the show would be done justice by someone. That someone obviously being him, the person who is so hardcore as a fan, because he already waited 8 years just to watch season 3. Damned be any other artists or pitches that may be better or more popular than him, HE is the true messiah and that is his chance to shine. So don’t be “neutral” and judge fairly based on actual competence, talent and effort, just vote for him blindly or else Trump wins the second term and your beautiful nation turns into the fourth rei- I mean,  Dobson will be a very sad guy who has come to terms with the fact he is not talented enough to work on a reboot/continuation of his favorite children show.

Well, it seemed to have had some impact though, as four day later he posted this

 And obviously Dobson is pissed his favorite pitch did not win and instead of being grateful for the good ratings some of his artwork got he focuses instead on the fact that his Enzo and Megabyte pic had the lowest rating. Which in my opinion it kinda deserved. I mean, look at those artpieces:

Enzo is okayish looking but the rest? That is not Megabyte and a genuine background, it is a cola light version of the entire Ripley disaster with the Samus Artwork commission. Also, Enzo’s hands just look weird. His fingers more alien than they need to be and the position of his legs not really adjusting to how the hip is supposed to move. The comic sample page that Dobson drew being okay overall, aside of the fact that Enzo in one panel HAS FOUR INSTEAD OF FIVE FINGERS ON ONE HAND DESPITE HAVING FIVE FINGERS IN A PREVIOUS PANEL. I am also not really a fan of how Dobson puts emphasize on the word “FAN” and “PAGES” in the post, indicating he thinks he is a better and bigger fan than any of the people who submitted their entries too, off handedly praising them but also making it obvious he thinks he is the most fit for the job, because he can also “copy any artstyle” and adjust to the needs of his superiors. Yeah, sure. That’s why you are nowadays and with even more time and effort put into your work so “good” at imitating Ladybug, your comics look exactly like in the show…

 Now considering that Dobson does not have ReBoot under his resume and likely tried his best to bury any enthusiasm for it, you can imagine how this chance at being an official artist ended up.

 Not even much of a follow up or introspective in why he may have not won. His enthusiasm died within two days.

And honestly, I am surprised that as a result he did not fake depression and rage quit doing comics for a month or so as he did here and there.

And that is pretty much the end of the ReBoot drama, at least as far as I know.

If you are interested what happened with the comic project, here is what I managed to gather:

The project did actually not die in development, but “ReBoot: Arrival” would be reimagined under the name “Code of Honour” and be published online in three “issues” over the course of the next few months. The comic’s status as “canon” continuation of the show is however very much in the air, as quite a lot of people think it is something of a fanfiction, others think it is a good enough continuation that unfortunately still does not deliver on an “ultimate” ending of the franchise. That said, with additional plans like a movie trilogy never been realized and the “reboot” known as “ReBoot: The Guardian Code” having been perceived as an insult by fans and a disappointment by most audiences (which Dobson was surprisingly silent about) this comic seems to be the best thing fans can still hope for and read.

Yeah, I am not even kidding. The comic is still up. Here, have two links to independent pages if you want to either read it for the first time or revisit it for the sake of nostalgia.

As for Dobson, if he reads this, I just have one thing to say to you: Don’t you ever again try to whine about how entitled fanboys are, if you felt entitled enough yourself you tried to manipulate a competition in your own favor in the hope to become a writer and then exploit ReBoot for your own agenda and benefit.

[echodrops]

Why You Should Be Shipping Shigaraki/Ochako

No, no, hang on a second--I see that side-eye you are throwing hard enough to ruin your peripheral vision. I feel the shade you’re casting like a thundercloud rolling in. But you didn’t read wrong. I meant what I said.

I’ve never made a secret of my love for rare pairs, but for once in my damn lonely shipper’s hellscape of a life I would love it if my favorite crack ship in a fandom had more than two fics (I’m NOT JOKING) to its name.

What can I do to correct this egregious oversight before the entire summer passes with nary a whisper of the most romantic ship since Juliet wherefore art thou’d Romeo?

Well, what else? I was forged in the fires of early 2000s’ fandom, and I know that desperate times call for desperate measures meticulously researched and extremely rose-tinted

Shipping Manifestos.

Fam, I am about to blow your minds, align your chakras, open your third eyes--because Shigaraki and Ochako is the most slept on ship in the entire BNHA fandom, and if you give me ten minutes like an hour (holy shit, this is long), I can prove it.

Disclaimer: @mistystarshine is the enabler who convinced me to write this but we were both enabled by @ohmytheon’s Reconfigure (on AO3) so you know who’s really responsible.

Spoilers to Chapter 231, watch out.

First off, I know what you’re thinking. Maybe you’re still reading from pure shock. Maybe you’re doubt-reading to get your daily fix of internet skepticism. Maybe you’re waiting for me to say these two characters are meant to be because she wears pink and his hair is blue. Maybe you’re already freaking out about age gaps but like that is what future fics and AUs are actually for!!!

I’m not telling you to give up your IzuOcha or Kacchako. I’m not gonna pry ShigaDabi out of your eager little villain stan hands. But if you’ve never considered multi-shipping, now is the time my friends, because I’m totally serious heartfelt here! I’ve got VALID reasons for shipping Shigako--ten of them, in fact:

1) Midoriya is taken for granted as Uraraka’s love interest--but Shigaraki is incredibly similar to him.

There are reams of meta on the parallels between Midoriya and Shigaraki, with plenty people noting how Horikoshi specifically set the two up as foils to examine similar character development despite their drastically different circumstances. Yet for all the meta pointing out that Shigaraki and Midoriya are basically the same character through a mirror darkly, I’ve never seen anyone bear that thought out to its logical conclusion: there are traits Uraraka admires in Midoriya that are extremely apparent in Shigaraki too.

Multiple times in the manga, Uraraka expresses admiration for Deku’s resolve and refusal to give up. His determination in the face of impossible odds and his sense of dedication to his cause are powerful motivating factors in Ochako’s storyline, and Deku’s behavior--his willingness to charge straight into danger and his unflinching pursuit of his goal to be #1--have basically become the standard to which Uraraka holds herself.

Her crush is literally founded on an appreciation for Midoriya’s drive, earnestness, and constant growth as a person.

But these are all traits that Shigaraki also explicitly possesses. Shigaraki’s unwavering resolve is so strong that even though everyone around him says dream is unattainable... they follow him anyway.

Ujiko flat out tells Shigaraki he’s chasing a pipe dream, but he’s willing to come along for the ride strictly because of how committed Shigaraki is to making that dream a reality. The strength of Tomura’s conviction alone persuaded a collection of the most volatile and difficult personalities in the manga to band together and become found family the most well-known anti-establishment organization in all of Japan.

Shigaraki never, even in the face of overwhelming threat, backs down from a challenge, and he approaches each impossible task with absolutely as much effort, ferocity, and refusal to quit as Deku. He is just as dedicated, just as much of a shounen protagonist main character, and just as willing to push himself above and beyond as Deku.

The traits that motivated Uraraka to become the character she is today, many of the exact same traits that formed her crush on Midoriya, are all there in Shigaraki. In another world, the person who inspired Uraraka to go “Plus Ultra” could be Tomura himself, and if 1) no sense of self-preservation, 2) ZERO CHILL, and 3) dogged obsession are what Uraraka finds attractive, Shigaraki clearly has 'em covered. Oh no, he’s meeting all my standards.

2) Being serious though, Ochako’s role in the plot would be vastly improved by more meaningful interactions with the antagonists, even if just in battle.

I’ve written before about how badly the writing of BNHA treats Ochako, and why her constantly being out-of-focus is a hallmark of the genre’s crippling inability to handle dynamic female characters, but it bears repeating: in her current position in the story, Uraraka’s character has minimal agency. She exists to fill the role of Deku’s love interest (at worst) and an emotional crutch (at best). Again, absolutely no hate on the IzuOcha ship--it’s clearly canon endgame and “wholesome” I guess is what they’re calling it nowadays. But the way IzuOcha’s being written in canon is actually the worst possible thing that could happen to Uraraka’s individual character, because Ochako’s crush on Deku has been given virtually no bearing on the story’s main plot and allows Horikoshi to consistently reduce Uraraka’s personal accomplishments to “inspirations from Deku” (in order to, likely, fulfill young male readers’ fantasy of having a girl fixated on them).

Is Uraraka about to do something cool in the manga? Wait for her comment about being motivated by Deku.

Does Uraraka actually get to see some action and get involved in a fight? Wait for someone to bring up her feelings for Deku.

Is Deku about to have a dramatic clash with the story’s villains to advance the main plotline? Wait for Ochako to entirely vanish (at worst) or get sidelined into a three panel clip where she’ll use the same martial art move she’s been using since like chapter 10 (at best).

If I have to read “Gunhead Martial Arts” one more fucking time... Give Ochako her OWN supermoves goddammit!!

The story of the comic itself continually pushes Ochako out of any position of relevance. She’s not one of UA’s strongest fighters (despite having a quirk that, if applied like ANY of the male characters, has incredible potential), she’s not given half the emotional depth or attention even side characters like Kirishima get, and her backstory lacks the development many of the male characters’ get (I’m looking at you, Todoroki).

As a “good girl,” she isn’t allowed to get her hands dirty like Toga, she isn’t allowed to get as bloodied or ugly as any of the boys, and she can never be allowed to surpass the main male characters in coolness or plot relevance because girls can be “heroes” but they can’t be The Hero™. (I’m literally gagging, guys.)

Which is EXACTLY why a plot involving Shigaraki and Ochako--in ANY capacity, even just a flat out fight against each other!--would actually be a fan-fucking-tastic addition to BNHA.

Skip the token Toga vs. Ochako chick fight where they squabble over who loves Izuku more. Let Toga talk to Izuku as herself for once. Let Uraraka throw down with the League’s leader. At least once, Horikoshi? Just once?

Literally any form of plot that puts Shigaraki and Ochako into contact would mean moving Uraraka into a more central position within the manga’s plot, would boost her screen-time, increase the likelihood of her contributing to the story’s primary conflict, and would give her more to do and emotionally engage with than just repeating the same lines about Deku being amazing on an endless loop. There is untapped character development potential in spades here if Uraraka was given chance to genuinely interact with the other half of the story’s cast!

Give👏 Uraraka👏 something👏 meaningful👏 to do!👏

Putting the story’s foremost female character on out there on the frontlines with the manga’s actual main character antagonist would finally break her out of the mold she’s been forced into by genre stereotypes and set her on an even playing field with the male heroes at last.

A meaningful encounter with Shigaraki could be Ochako’s ticket to being treated respectfully by the story itself (and hell if giving underappreciated characters a real place in the world isn’t Tomura’s freakin’ calling card already).

3) Okay, I know the words “subverting expectations” leave a bad taste in everyone’s mouth nowadays, but there is a huge difference between “throwing inexplicable plot twists at the audience just for shock factor” and “averting stale cliches in an emotionally rewarding manner.” Sure, cliches do exist for a reason, but there are still many instances where actively avoiding a cliche plotline is a great choice. A shounen manga’s token love interest ending up with someone other than the hero--namely with a (reformed) villain--would be an interesting flip on the trite “hero gets the girl” script.

Look, we all know how it goes: Hero clashes with Bad Guy. They duke it out all over Kingdom Come. RIP like fifty square city blocks. The Hero wins, heads home triumphant, sweeps his Princess off her feet, and sails off into the hero rankings sunset. End of the same story we’ve seen a million times. Sometimes it’s done well and the audience is left satisfied. Other times, the heroine involved is reduced to the hero’s reward, less person than wish fulfillment. In either case, tying up a romantic subplot with a hero is the go-to way of resolving female characters’ storylines and, at this point, pretty much a given in manga, even when the romantic subplot is never given the development it deserves, leaving audiences bewildered at how and why the hook-up actually happened.

I’m not saying every comic should “subvert expectations” and cancel its romantic subplot between the hero and heroine, of course not. But I am saying that it would be pretty refreshing to see something else for once.

By virtue of their role, villains don’t usually “get the girl.” Even redeemed villains rarely end up in happy, healthy, well-written relationships. It’s not impossible but it is unlikely that a series’ designated female lead ever wavers in her attentions from the main hero to a new romantic target.

So it would be pretty cool if one did, if the moral of the story’s romantic subplot wasn’t just "token love interest completes painfully shoehorned romantic gestures.” A good romance with a redeemed ex-villain instead of a hero would take a lot more explanation. It would demand, by its very nature, more work on the author’s part to suspend disbelief. The characters would have to develop an entirely different rapport from the normal interactions between designated love interests, and, to a certain extent, strong character growth would be required in order for such a romance to even get started. There’s more moral complexity and conflict to a subplot like this, and a greater sensation of choice--if the heroine doesn’t have to end with the hero by the end of the story, well hey... That means she could end up with just about anyone. Whoa.

Even more so, in the specific case of Shigaraki, who has lived a life of misery and manipulation, the idea that he could come out on the other side, grow as a person, redeem himself, and eventually enter a healthy relationship with someone who isn’t going to hurt him is an idea I find deeply appealing. I think there are a lot of villain stans, myself included, who see parts of themselves in Shigaraki. If a character who has been so severely impacted by abuse can still heal and ultimately end up happy, to me, that’s a far more hopeful and heart-warming conclusion than the alternatives. I did warn you this manifesto would be rose-tinted, didn’t I?

I want storylines that prove that none of us are beyond saving. That people who make bad choices can still change. That romance isn’t a reward for playing the “right” role. That heroines have options. That there are still pleasant surprises to be found in romance plots.

4) But why Shigaraki and Ochako, in particular? It’s not like they have any remotely shared life experiences--

Oops. Friendly reminder: Ochako is the only major character in the manga besides the villains who is overtly described as, I quote, “poorer than poor.” Todoroki, Yaomomo, and Iida can all make it rain; Kaminari, Mina, and Jirou can afford stylish clothes; Kirishima can drop a stupid amount on night vision googles... Even Midoriya, whose father “works overseas,“ can afford plenty of All Might merchandise. One of the popular fandom theories for a while was that Ochako could be U.A.’s traitor specifically because of her desire to help her parents financially, and I think that most readers at this point can discern a clear divide in BNHA’s society: heroes are the “haves” and villains are the “have nots.” To be a hero in this story is to attend a prestigious school, have access to expensive support items, gear, insurance, fame and glory, etc.

Meanwhile, with the exception of All For One, to be a villain in BNHA’s story is to be marginalized, live in unfit conditions, lack access to basic safety and nutritional resources, and struggle to make ends meet. When ability to thrive in a hero-centric society is synonymous with being a good and worthwhile person, anyone who doesn’t just naturally excel in the hero-driven economy is treated as flawed at best and suspect at worst. Poor characters in the story are ignored, and, as demonstrated with people like Twice, left essentially to fend for themselves.

Uraraka’s status as lower income is mostly played for laughs. She’s still a privileged character in that she can attend U.A., receive hero items for free, has a safe place to live, etc. But it is important that the story acknowledges her family’s situation, because her financial status does set her apart from her classmates.

She is less privileged than the others. Being “the poor character” situates Uraraka in the interesting divide between those who couldn’t cope and chose to rebel against hero society instead, versus those who conformed to the hero system in an attempt to improve their situations. In different circumstances, if Uraraka’s family was just even the tiniest bit worse off, we might be seeing a very different character here, one who had to make some much harder choices to keep her family afloat.

Having been in the position of "going without,” Uraraka also has a unique understanding of the “real world” that many of her heroics classmates might lack. She understands what it is like to go hungry, to not be able to afford to keep up with the newest trends, to be constantly anxious about the future--to feel unsuccessful, overlooked, and under constant pressure to perform. As someone who wasn’t raised in the lap of luxury or even really a middle-class home, Uraraka has more insight into--and would likely have more empathy for--the plight of the downtrodden daily criminals of the BNHA world. Just based on her own life experiences, Ochako is more likely than her classmates to recognize how harsh reality can be, and understand the temptations that lead people to make terrible decisions.

This makes Ochako an especially interesting character in terms of her pro hero future. Would she be able to sympathize and reach out to struggling "villains” more effectively than others from her class, who lack her humble background? Would she be able to better see the big picture of BNHA’s society, and the way it actively creates villains from its marginalized populations? Would she be able to look at the League not just as criminals, but also as people who never stood a chance within the confines of a rigged social structure?

Uraraka’s background shifts her closer to the story’s villains than many of the other hero characters, and puts her in a unique place to both empathize and become motivated to change the flawed system that produced people like Shigaraki and the League in the first place.

5) Likewise, Uraraka’s background actually makes her more palatable to Shigaraki than other heroes. At least at the beginning of the comic, Uraraka isn’t shy about admitting that one of her reasons for becoming a hero is to help her parents financially. Ochako’s original motivation for heroism isn’t portrayed as nobly as others’ like Deku--Deku has no ulterior motives for being a hero; he just wants to save people and wouldn’t care about personally benefiting.

Instead, Ochako is presented as someone who (initially) sees heroism as a means to an end. It’s not that she doesn’t want to save people, but that she’s not doing so only for the intrinsic worth... the hefty paycheck that comes from heroism is a big draw.

Over time the manga has shown her shifting away from this (which actually makes her character less unique, unfortunately), but I’m sure it’s still a thought for her, and she’s definitely going to send paychecks to her parents in the future. At the end of the day, heroism is still going to be Uraraka’s ticket to a better lifestyle, even if she’s committed herself to it honestly by the time she leaves U.A.

But it’s this exact form of personal motivation that Shigaraki is much more likely to understand than the “goody-two-shoes” motivations of people like Deku. Multiple times in the comic Shigaraki has expressed confusion with society’s habit of clinging mindlessly to symbols, of their blind faith in the virtues of heroism, and their ability to simply overlook suffering because “surely a hero will do something about it.” Stain’s ideals about “true heroes” go straight past Shigaraki, who seems to hate heroes who are earnest (All Might, I’m talking about All Might) far more than those who are simply faking their way through for fame. 

Shigaraki understands humans who are driven by personal gain. He respects the individual desires of people he cares about. Someone in the hero industry explicitly seeking tangible benefits would likely, to Shigaraki at least, come across as more genuine than someone who claims they have no ulterior motives, and a person who is blunt about their needs and grounded in the reality of BNHA’s world would likely be much more acceptable to Tomura than someone who spews trite lines about peace and justice.

Shigaraki’s feelings for heroes have been irreparably damaged by his conditioning from All For One, but there are certainly some heroes that he would find less loathsome than others. He will probably never understand Deku’s selflessness. All Might’s saccharine symbolism actively infuriates him. But a person who became a hero to put food on the table? To provide for her parents (maybe especially because it is her parents she’s trying to provide for)? That’s at least understandable. If the manga’s future does see Shigaraki redeemed, my thought is that the only type of heroes we’ll ever see him willingly interact with would still be heroes just like Ochako, with more “down to earth” personal motivations. Uraraka, your codename is “If I had to date a hero”...

6) While we’re talking about shared life experiences, there’s another very obvious similarity between Shigaraki and Ochako: neither one of them can touch things with all five fingers.

Cute/fridge horror observation: Shigaraki is even daintier about touching things than Uraraka is; Uraraka usually lifts just her pinkies, but Shigaraki frequently uses as few fingers as possible.

Yeah, yeah, they both have to be dainty and careful with everything they hold. It’d be cute to watch them eat together. They could mutually gripe about the annoyance of video game consoles not designed for four-finger use. More than that though, neither one of them can touch other human beings without the risk of causing death.

Uraraka, as a hero, has the more privileged quirk design (she can turn her quirk off, while Shigaraki can’t) and until recently, the comic was always very careful to portray Uraraka’s quirk in a way that no one was endangered by it. But dropping Zero Gravity into the hands of a villain for a single chapter reveals the truth: Uraraka’s quirk has just as much lethal potential as Shigaraki’s.

Like Shigaraki, Uraraka has to face the reality that her touch alone could jeopardize the safety of anyone she comes into contact with, in her daily life and in her hero work. Drop some debris without looking twice? Just crushed a civilian. Release your quirk without thinking? Now the villain you floated is paste on the sidewalk. Thought that it was safe to float away the building? Oops, you crushed someone still trapped inside. Yikes. In a one-on-one battle, Uraraka is actually at a disadvantage not because her quirk is weak, but the dead opposite--in an outdoor fight, she would have to actively work not to accidentally send people off into outer space.

Having an auto-activate touch quirk means that both Shigaraki and Ochako have to be conscious of every single thing they touch all the time. Both of their quirks require constant bodily awareness, and both come with the lurking knowledge that “My touch causes problems.” Even for Ochako, who would merely be a nuisance if she accidentally floated objects indoors, it’s easy to internalize frustration and negative associations with one’s own body. Every day, Ochako has to be careful with herself in a way that few of her peers do, another factor that sets her apart.

One of the story’s overarching themes is the idea of “self-acceptance” and what it even means to “accept yourself” in a world where (almost) every human being possesses a distinguishing feature, often built into their bodies at the expense of standard human functioning. For people with limited control over their quirks, who can’t choose when the effect activates, a quirk is a constant burden and facet of their identity that entirely re-shapes how they interact with the world. Both Shigaraki and Uraraka face the practicality of having burdensome, even lethal, auto-activate quirks that require constant self-awareness. This is a similarity that, of the major characters, only Shigaraki and Ochako possess so far. (Even other major characters with touch-based quirks like Overhaul appear to be able to choose when to activate their quirks).

The “funny” way Shigaraki and Ochako hold things seems like just a small similarity until you remember the amount of practice and frustration it must have taken to internalize a four-fingered touch. Until you remember that this similarity marks them both as very careful and self-conscious characters. Until you remember that Shigaraki’s got a one-touch instakill... but so does Uraraka Ochako.

7) Okay, similarities are cool and all, but you know what they say: opposites attract. And if we’re talking character motivation, there are no cleaner opposites in the entire series. Shigaraki and Ochako are actually even better emotional foils than Shigaraki and Deku, because Ochako’s central motivation is “Make as many people smile as possible” and Shigaraki’s is, literally, “Make it so no one can ever smile again.”

I know I ragged on it earlier, but now I’m going to use it to my full advantage: as the story evolved and characters grew, Ochako’s “true” motivation to become a hero revealed itself: she feels a deep, intrinsic happiness when witnessing the happiness of others. Her desire as a hero is to spread relief, the sense of security that allows people to go about their days smiling. She literally feels happiest when everyone around her is happy.

Even more so than Deku, this casts Uraraka as Shigaraki’s diametric opposite in the story, because Shigaraki’s entire pipe dream goal also hinges on the smiles of others--and how absolutely much he hates them. Shigaraki’s goal is total world destruction because he just resents the happiness of others that fucking much.

On the surface alone it’s more fascinating than the story will probably ever live up to: Ochako, the heroine who wants to spread smiles; Shigaraki, the villain who wants to destroy them. Even if we’re just talking canon, zero romance involved, that would still be an interesting conflict to explore. The story could cover a lot of deeper ground by drawing the comparison between these two characters more directly. It would definitely validate Uraraka being involved in more major plot events, at the very least.

BUT this was supposed to be about shipping, so of course I can’t leave it there, and leaving it there would only be half the story anyway, because nobody is born hating smiles. Everything we’ve seen of Shigaraki’s past so far indicates that he was a kid with a cute dog, a warm relationship with his sister, and an interest in heroes--i.e., a decent life that probably included his own fair share of smiles. Shigaraki’s hatred and resentment are direct products of the traumatic manipulation he suffered at AFO’s hands. He despises the idea that people around him can smile and act upbeat, even when they objectively know villains are lurking all around them. He is actually sick to his stomach at the idea of people blindly putting their faith in heroes, knowing what he does: that heroes often fail, that there are many people who desperately need to be rescued and are instead overlooked. The world failed Shimura Tenko and then had the nerve to keep on smiling without him.

Other people’s smiles represent nothing but the joy, security, love, and peace that Shigaraki Tomura hasn’t experienced since the day his quirk manifested. The sight of any living thing fills Shigaraki with rage because everything bright and beautiful, everything good and calm and kind and soft and warm, is everything that Shigaraki has lost and believes he will never, ever get to experience again.

Shigaraki doesn’t really hate the pure happy smiles of others; he hates the fact that the world has taken away every single thing he ever had to smile about.

It is my belief that Horikoshi is hinting at a redemption arc for Shigaraki, especially as we see the League become closer allies. But Shigaraki can’t be completely redeemed, can’t be persuaded to give up his world-destruction plan, until he can look at the smiles of others without scorn. Until the bright, upbeat attitudes of heroes other people no longer feel like a personal attack. Until he’s happy enough that the happiness of others no longer hurts. Until the weight is lifted.

And I can’t think of any character more obviously suited to helping lift an immense weight than Uraraka, the zero gravity hero who wants nothing more than to spread smiles.

8) Speaking of lifting weights... Kacchako is a popular ship stemming in large part from Bakugou’s refusal to treat Uraraka with kid gloves. He faces her head-on as a real opponent and views her like any other hero hopeful.

As I’ve said before, this is pretty much the most respectfully the series itself has ever treated Uraraka Ochako, and it caught a lot of attention because it was one of the rare occasions that a female pro hero-in-training was really treated as an equal to the male characters. Kacchako shippers had something awesome to work with.

But... You know who else treats women as equals? (Hell, you know who treats literally everyone as equals, from those with mutant quirks to trans people to those with severe mental health issues?) You can say what you want about Shigaraki’s habit of, you know, mass murder, but in terms of viewing others equally and respecting (okay, let’s be real, it’s probably closer to just ignoring) differences, Tomura is about as open-minded as BNHA characters come. The League is an equal opportunity employer.

Unlike actual hero characters, Shigaraki has never once suggested that Toga is incapable of keeping up with any of the male members of the League, and in fact has entrusted her with many of the League’s most dangerous and crucial missions. He explicitly has faith in her ability and skill.

Toga’s right there in the fight against Gigantomachia and the QLA, as much an equal member of the League as anyone else. In terms of gender equality, the villains seem to be light-years ahead of their hero counterparts, and Shigaraki in particular doesn’t discriminate, among his allies or his opponents either. He’s not a “spare the women and children” kind of guy; every hero and villain challenger is treated with equal violence (and equal snark), whether they’re male, female, a long-time pro or a student in training.

In whatever context--canon opponent, AU ally, or a future romantic interest--Shigaraki would take Ochako just as seriously as Bakugou did. If you like Kacchako because Bakugou doesn’t dismiss Uraraka, that same dynamic would be present in Shigako too.

9) And on the topic of Shigaraki and women... It doesn’t feel accidental that every single female character who ever had love for Shigaraki has been taken away from him. A distinct part of Shigaraki’s storyline is that all positive female role models have been systematically removed from his life. He lost his grandmother, a hero he could have looked up to; he lost his mother, who he now has no memory of; he lost the older sister he clearly held dear... All For One’s control over Tomura has always been total, but this particular detail feels especially insidious: was All For One’s spite for Nana so strong that he delighted in deliberately destroying every single relationship Tenko had with women connected to Nana’s legacy? (Or is AFO perhaps just a raging misogynist? Every single one of his known associates is male and he seemed to despise and mock Nana particularly hard...)

In any case, the point I’m trying to make here is that, even ruling love interests out, Shigaraki’s storyline would be enriched by forging a meaningful connection with a female character like Ochako. Acceptance--maybe even some grudging admiration--for a female hero? A fantastic opportunity to show just how different the “villains” are from the discriminatory society that produced them. Supporting friendship while he’s on the road to recovery? A+ way to diversify interactions between the male and female cast. Send a tough girl to Tartarus to question his motives? Nice chance for tense dialogue and some good old noire-esque foe yay. Hostage situation that takes a turn for the surprisingly cordial? Fun way to explore different dynamics and humanize the villains because hey, they treated the “damsel” to dinner shortbread cookies. My god, Shigaraki could even develop some positive sense of rivalry with a woman, for example! The possibilities are endless if you’re actually willing to give female characters a shot!

Being more serious, Tomura’s life has been dramatically marked by the loss of his female family members, and--at least from what we know so far--his entire youth was spent without the presence of reliable friendships, let alone any form of “love” that wasn’t disturbingly fake. Beyond his fragmented memories, he has no models for healthy relationships, romantic or otherwise.

Letting Shigaraki develop to the point that he could form a mutually positive relationship with a female hero character would be extremely cathartic for me as a reader. I don’t mean “rewarding redemption with a last-minute happy ending romance”--I mean actually getting the opportunity to watch Tomura rediscover what it means to be genuinely loved and realize he has the capacity to give love and be happy in return...

Reaching that level of mutual support and closeness--especially with a female pro hero--would be the biggest “FUCK YOU” that Shigaraki could give to All For One, short of, you know, actually killing him.

Shigaraki Tomura has a critical (and deliberate) lack of healthy connections to women. BNHA, coincidentally, has a criminally under-utilized female lead just twiddling her thumbs over here, waiting for a meaningful plotline to be thrown her way.

Sure, putting AFO in prison is cool and all, but have you considered... crushing his pride and legacy of evil by helping the boy he tortured for years learn to love again? I’m just sayin’!

Uraraka Ochako, snatching Shigaraki right the fuck out of AFO’s hands:

10) Basically what the whole thing boils down to is this: Shigaraki Tomura needs a hero.

Don’t mistake my meaning. A lot of “girl meets bad boy” plots end up amounting to “girl becomes emotionally responsible for fixing bad boy’s issues,” and that’s not what I’m gunning for--Shigaraki has to redeem himself because redemption is only meaningful when it stems from the character’s own inner desire to change; I’m not quite rose-tinted enough to buy into the Love Redeems trope myself. I’m definitely not advocating anyone dump Shigaraki Tomura as he is now into Uraraka Ochako’s lap and expect her to turn him from a beast to a beauty. It’s not an unrelated woman’s responsibility to fix a broken man.

But! From a reader’s perspective, I think we can agree: Shigaraki’s redemption cannot be complete until he learns to believe in real heroes. He doesn’t have to like them. He doesn’t have to support hero society. But he has to be able to look at real heroes like Izuku and Ochako and admit that they are doing what’s right--that society is a better place because they are here. Shigaraki’s path to recovery can’t even begin until he’s capable of at least acknowledging that the world has things worth saving in it.

If Horikoshi moves forward with a redemption arc for Shigaraki, it will probably be Deku who Detroit Smashes the message of truly noble heroes into Shigaraki’s head. That’s his job as the resident Warrior Therapist, I suppose. But you know... to me, it might be even more meaningful if Shigaraki’s hero--if the hand that reaches out to rescue him--isn’t The Hero’s™ but just a hero’s. We all know Deku is selfless and good to the core. As All Might’s perfect successor, he really has nothing to prove. It’s everyone else who is in question. It’s the whole rest of hero society that owes Shigaraki Tomura an explanation for the suffering of people like the League’s members. It’s everyone else who needs to prove they can do better--that in the future, there will be no bloody children left abandoned in back alleyways.

Uraraka Ochako’s conviction is to save people. As a female hero who hasn’t lived a privileged life, she’s uniquely situated to think about those who are most often overlooked. In a world where violence begets violence, where only those with strength and flash excel, what a powerful message it would send for the terrifying antagonist to effectively be rescued by someone the story itself has called “a frail girl.” At the end of the day, heroics isn’t supposed to be about mountain-destroying explosions and mach punches--heroics is supposed to be about heart, about reaching out a gentle helping hand, about spreading smiles to those who need them most.

Tomura’s faith in heroes has been brutally stripped from him, and every part of his conflict is tied up intimately with his misdirected hatred: it wasn’t actually heroes who isolated and hurt him--it was villains. In order to move forward, he will have to come to that horrible realization, deal with that means for himself and his place in the world, and recognize the truth: there are goodness and good people in the world. Selfless heroes, those who wouldn’t turn their backs on a crying child, do exist. There are people, even now, who would extend a kind hand to Shigaraki Tomura and do their best to bring a real smile to his face. Because that’s what’s really going on, after all.

Shimura Tenko is still waiting to be saved.

And I know just the person to do it.

[backyardrevolutionsystemreviews]

Backyard Revolution Review – Does This System Helps To Save Your Electricity?

People of recent ages are installing solar panels at home and are saving thousands of dollars as well as energy every year. But the set up is difficult and requires a large space for installation. Maybe it helps you to save money in the long term go, but the initial costing is huge and approximately takes about $10K.

So people now asking for another alternative to the solar panel. This is when Zack Bennet comes with a revolutionary idea called the Backyard Revolution. It requires less amount of space and it’s very cost-effective. People with a very little electrical knowledge can easily set this at their homes.

This program was specially designed to assist you with the 3D solar panel, costing you $200 as a max, occupying 5% less space than those of conventional ones.

Let me provide you with a complete Backyard Revolution review, how the program works and what are the benefits and drawbacks you can expect.

Features of Backyard Revolution System

People who are reading this Backyard Revolution review have landed on this page is sick and tired of the daily power blackouts and monthly expensive bills all year round. Correct? The first thing that comes to our mind is the installation of solar panels. But again, they require much cost and large space for their installation. So, it’s time to think one step ahead and lighten up your house with just less than 10 sq. ft of space.

The main advantage I found while testing the Backyard revolution system is the Zero Maintenance cost. It is all about installing some #D structure panels, a series of overlapping panels that help to generate double energy with much less space than that of the solar panels.

The layer of solar panels is placed in such a way that each of them receives a full glaze of the sunlight. The program contains the complete installation process that is much easier for all its users. You don’t need to be an expert to build the system. I have discusses about it with few users of backyard revolution and they all did it themselves or with the help of their friends.

To make it less complicated, the program comes with a detailed manual instructions in a CD form and also in the PDF form, which makes it much more easier to install. The video guide is very helpful and it will give help you get a clear idea about the system. Apart from all these, you will also get reports regarding protection protocol, Stockpiling Secrets and Homestead Alternative Sources.

Backyard Revolution Creator

The Backyard revolution guide was created by Zack Bennet, who is a carpenter. He is based out of Orlando and is blessed with a beautiful wife and a lovely daughter.

One night Zack went through a mishap when he was taken over by few intruders from his backyard as the power grid failed. And that incident helped him to the invention of this very program. That incident triggered him with the idea, and he wanted to make sure that he would never go to the backyard without light again. This made him think of an invention; something that would be electricity independent.

Main Advantages Backyard Revolution Solar Array

Even you are having less space at your home, you can now easily install Backyard Revolution system and save a lot of money and energy. But money-saving is not only the primary reason, with all the climatic changes, we really need to think differently about the environment and make our future a better place to live in.

By installing your own panel you not only save your bills, but also save the environment from the harmful emissions caused by the electricity generators. If you have even very little space you can easily generate your own electricity with the help of the Backyard Revolution and reward yourself and the world. Once you are happy reading the Backyard Revolution review its time to get your hands into it. Try it yourself and help others, I am sure enough you will be happy to do so!

Does Backyard Revolution System Really Work?

I am sharing you a video posted by a Backyard Revolution user (Billy Montes) on YouTube. You will get an idea bout the system after watching this video. In this video, the user even connected a electrical driller and a Television. Both worked well. Please use the comment box below this review, If you still have any questions regarding the system.

Pros and Cons of Backyard Revolution PDF

I have mentioned many advantages of the program. I have been trying to find out the negatives but I couldn’t find many. I have mentioned the pros and cons of the Backyard Revolution system below;

Pros

Easy Installation:

As said earlier, a little building knowledge is enough for the installation. A small kid will also be able to install it seeing the videos provided without much trouble in hand. There are many people who have successfully installed it in their home and happily using the system.

Independent:

These national grid systems cannot be trusted anymore. They go down at any minute. They are later given very few ratings, proving it to be unreliable. If you really want to stay in a world of freedom and save your money from the monthly electricity bill, then Backward Revolution is the solution to your power problems. It provides you with an opportunity to generate electricity on your own.

Saves Money:

The electricity meter rises dramatically each day, out of your control. And you are forced to pay large bills without much consumption. This system can help you to cut on your conventional bills by about 50%. This system is cost-effective and reliable, making you independent from the third party electricity generator.

Requires Much less space:

As per the Backyard Revolution review, We often moved back in the installation of a conventional solar panel as they require a large amount of space. MIT studies have shown that Backward Revolution takes only 5%  space as compared to the conventional solar panels, and generating a double amount of energy as compared to them.

Low Maintenance Cost:

The biggest and most important long term advantage of the Backyard Revolution system is with its maintenance cost. It’s having a zero maintenance cost.  Once build piling many solar panels at one go, you can place than anywhere and use it all year round.

Cons

Even though I tried my best to bring you some negatives about Backyard Revolution, there are no negativity of this product which can overrule the positive sides. Still, it does not have any charging facilities, as they are only charged with sunlight. So you may face problem on cloudy days. This is the only problem I could find. I know It’s not a big deal while considering the price and other benefits, but it’s my duty to bring you the facts.

Is Backyard Revolution a scam?

This question was asked by my wife and children while I first told them about the program. So, I thought of adding the same question here. My readers might have same doubt in their mind. If you are doubtful about the legitimacy of this program, I have to tell you that, there is nothing to worry. Even if you couldn’t make the system as the book said, you can return it and get your money back.

Frequently Asked Questions About Backyard Revolution

1. What if I couldn’t build the system using Backyard Revolution Guide?

Ans: The Backyard revolution is sold by ClickBank. A well known company and they do have a great money back policy. If you couldn’t build the system, or if you met with any obstacles, you could get help from their support agents. But, if you really wish to cancel the order, you are protected by a 60 Days, 100% money back policy.

2. I am not a techie guy. Can I do this myself?

Ans: The language used in Backyard Revolution book is so much friendly that even a non-technician can easily handle the setup and installation within a few hours or 4-5 hours to be more precise.

3. Do I need to charge the system?

This product requires nothing except sunlight for a few hours. You can use this for any hour of the day without any electrical charging.  And it’s handy as it does not require any additional cost or maintenance cost like the other solar panels.

4. What kind of support I might get?

Apart from the video instructions, the author provides you with overall email access for 12 months. If you are stuck anywhere or unable to install, having any requires, you can always have access through the email. Not only these, but the author also provides a 60-day money-back guarantee, though you can rest assured, it’s of no use! As you are bound to love it.

5. Can I power my entire house?

Even though most people are using it as a secondary power source, it is possible to power an entire house using this system. For that, you should calculate your daily power usage and then scale up the system by adding few modules. The guide contain the instructions to do so.

6. How much space is needed to place the system?

The system requires a space less than 10 sqft. Please check the above video. You will get an idea about the size of the Backyard Revolution System.

7. How long does it take to build the entire system?

Spend first 30 minutes to watch instruction videos and read the manual thoroughly. It might take another 2 and a half hour to build the entire system. The total building process could take up to 3 hours. To build the system, you need solar panels, solar controller, a battery, power inverter and few pieces of electric wire. To buy these things, you might have to spend around $150.

Backyard Revolution System Review Conclusion

Who you are? A responsible citizen – of your family or country? Both, right? So stop relying on the government agencies or the electricity board agencies to provide you with electricity at a high cost. Pay for what you get. Can they provide you with the desired energy during a blackout or any disasters? So why not you come up with your own electricity production that too at no cost and zero maintenance.

Installing Backyard Revolution solar array in your home not only helps your family also you are helping the world by reducing the pollution generated by these generators every year.

As we all know, electricity is so important, whether you want to prepare your meals, wash clothes, maintaining home temperature, in every aspect of life. Then what about when there is an emergency blackout? The only option we are left with is generating our own electricity.!

With such a discussion above, I want to end up with the last note. If you really want a constant source of energy without relying upon others, then install this Backyard Revolution system. This is a safe, reliable device, with easy installation. Along with energy-saving, save your money as well, no feeling is better than the feeling of freedom!

[kyluxtrashpit]

Hello naughty children, it’s 1 am rant time

So! My brain is slightly more together now than after the trailer first dropped and I’ve had some time to process all my Feels. I’ve settled on cautiously hopeful, with a hint of apprehension and a strong dose of ‘oh my god, this is really the end’. But overall, I think I feel pretty good about it, though it really raises more questions than answers. They meant it when they said ‘teaser’ lmao

(Rant is mostly positive, includes explicit discussion of what we’ve learned from the panel and the trailer. Some reservations and negative thoughts, plus a lot of speculation and touching on such controversial subjects as Reysky, Kylo redemption, and Hux in TLJ. Cut for length because I have no idea how to just use fewer words lmao)

I especially liked that it was so focused on Rey and that it’s a very clear torch-passing. Which, tbh, probably should’ve happened before now and did a little bit, but this really felt like the true moment of it. She’s the hero. She’s going to be a legend. I love that. Also that flip? Holy fuck. Slammed in the face by the reminder of how gay I am lmao. I have some Thoughts about it I’ll get into below, but from a visual point of view, it’s RAD AS HELL. I also love Finn and Poe featuring heavily and that the trio really does seem to be together for most of the movie. Which is nice. I think we need that. JJ said something in the panel about it being an ‘adventure’ and I think that feeling was captured well in the trailer. That part really excites me

Also! My boy! Kylo’s looking like a right hot mess and tbh I’m here for it lmao. I still have a strong urge to bathe him and kinda hope he doesn’t look like a depressed wreck of a human being for the entire movie, but still. I love my big messy boy. Also him just yeeting that dude into the ground? DAMN. I sometimes forget that Kylo is like… b i g. It’s a nice reminder. I also LOVE that the broken helmet rumour was real. That’s my fucking boy. I frequently tag him as ‘my precious disaster boy’ for a reason and I’m glad to see more of that. I would honestly probably lose interest in Kylo completely if he was ever like, calm and composed and not a complete fucking mess lmao. I kind of wish we’d seen just a touch more of him, but I know there’s more info to come and I still like that it focused heavily on the heroes for the first one. I imagine we’ll see more of him later

I’m… not really sure what to think of the Palpatine reveal. If he’s going to show up as a cameo of some sort, say as a Force ghost or something, then that’s pretty dang cool. If he’s going to show up as a ‘hello naughty children, it’s Force lightning time’ and take over as the main threat, I’d admittedly be disappointed. As much as I think a Kylo redemption is likely (and whether people like that or not, I’m indifferent and have made my peace with it as long as it’s done in an okay way) in no small part because Disney likes money, I still feel like replacing him with Palpatine is just… it feels derivative. We’ve had Palpatine before. A lot. 6 movies of him plus his appearances in the side materials. Do we really need more?

Now, there’s been heavy suggestion that there is some unknown threat that comes into this one and if that’s Palpatine, it would match up with the rumours. But I’d much rather it be something from his legacy with him only having a cameo. Because the really terrifying part about Palpatine is he had a plan for the continued survival of the Empire even in the case of his death. The Aftermath novels are really well done that way and tbh, especially with Chuck Wendig’s hinting on twitter, I wouldn’t be surprised if we see something from there come up. I mean, technically the entire First Order is Palpatine’s legacy. Something from his legacy could truly be anything and I like that possibility a lot more than just ‘oh damn, time to kill this asshole again’. Idk. We’ll have to see how that plays out

The title is also curious because it really confirms one of 2 possibilities: either Reysky, Kylo redemption, or both. Which, again, both of those are huge spoilers, so it’s an interesting choice to play for a title. That said, we don’t know which, so it doesn’t tell us definitively, I suppose, but still. And no, I don’t buy the theories about it referring to Luke or Anakin somehow returning; that would be stupid. We have new characters for a reason and they need to be the central focus. This is the same reason I’m not fond of Palpatine being the big bad; let the new villains shine. I also don’t believe it’s Leia because I doubt they had enough left over footage of Carrie to make that work

Of course, I would’ve enjoyed having a nice 0.2 seconds of the back of Hux’s head lmao, or even any info on the dark side characters at all because I’m a filthy villain fucker, but I’m not super upset about it. I’m kinda sad that Phasma is confirmed as dead, but I also expected that. My biggest hope for Hux is really that he gets to be scary and not treated as a joke, so I hope JJ really leans in to that. Let him have his moment. Let him be a credible threat because, really, he is. Tbh, I’d be more afraid of him as my nemesis than the vast majority of Star Wars villains. He’s got a higher kill count than anyone in all of Star Wars except maybe Palpatine himself (exact number of deaths due to the Clone Wars, the Empire’s rule, and the rebellion combined are unknown, but are probably in the billions, which would put him and Hux, terrifyingly, on the same level). It still throws me for a loop how often that’s forgotten, both by fandom and, sometimes, the official material. Hux is what happens when ambition, intelligence, ruthlessness, and fervent belief in a cause converge. I know he’s going to fail and he’s going to die in this one but, fuck, please let him die as the Starkiller instead of a ‘miscast tinkerer’. He deserves that much and, more importantly, so do I lmao. And Domhnall does too, tbh, because he’s a great actor who deserves better than being sidelined completely

(Another reason not to like Palpatine coming back: basically guarantees Hux has no role and gets completely forgotten because there’s a new big bad in town. I might actually cry if that happens)

I also know we will get more on the villains later, so we’ll just have to see how that pans out. As for other new stuff, Naomi Ackie’s character looks rad as fuck and I love her already. I’m also ECSTATIC to see Lando back. I fucking love Lando. And he finally got the Falcon back! Tbh I hope his role is rather significant and it’s kinda in line with Han’s role in TFA. I’m excited by that possibility. Also the Leia scenes… fuck. That hug with Rey fucked me up hard. I can’t believe we’re doing this without Carrie and it breaks my heart tbh

Another curious note: so we see a tie fighter that looks like a modified Silencer flying at Rey. We also see Kylo in a cockpit that definitely does not match the Silencer’s from TLJ. So it’s possible that was not actually Kylo flying at her, which raises some interesting questions. I saw some people saying they could see Poe’s jacket in the window but I think they’re full of shit and just seeing something they want to lmao. It remains to be seen who is actually flying it. The context of that scene is also odd: in what fucking universe does it make sense to use a SPACE craft with GUNS capable of atmospheric flight to run someone ON FOOT over from like 3 feet off the ground? It doesn’t. That’s stupid. That does make me think it’s possible it’s some sort of really risky training exercise, no matter who is behind the controls. I suppose it is possible that perhaps the guns were disabled somehow and the pilot is just going for broke, but the ship looks undamaged and that strategy still doesn’t make a lot of sense. The correct thing to do would be to come from above and crash it into the person while ejecting moments before impact, not chasing them like you’re driving a car. It’s dumb. I really hope that’s not real combat because it makes no damn sense to me lmao. Another reason lending to the training exercise idea: if I were Rey, I would’ve gone below, not above. She’s small. A tie fighter hovers. She would’ve fit under it easily and been able to slash from below without having to jump into the damn sky. Though, counterpoint: she has her lightsaber ignited and is turning to slash at the cockpit. Not really a nice thing to do to an ally of yours helping you train, hm? Idk. The scene looks cool as fuck, but the more I think about it, the more it bugs me tbh lmao

As a last thing… it’s really hitting me that this is it. This is the end of the Skywalker saga. Even though I know they have other stories planned with new characters at some point, imo, this is really the end of the true part of the franchise. How much am I really going to care about Star Wars without the familiar faces? After decades… this is really it. That’s… very bittersweet. I have loved these movies, always, but especially so in recent years (as evidenced by the existence of this blog lmao) and they’ve been a big part of my life. Yet here we are. And I just… I’m feeling melancholy about that in and of itself, but I also really, really want this to be a satisfying ending. It doesn’t have to be perfect, but I want it to fit. I want it to feel right. I want closure and I want this ending to do justice to these characters, including the main ones, the side ones, and the ones who came before but aren’t featured in this trilogy. That’s really what I’m aching for here. And I am cautiously hopeful, but I am also nervous. This is a very tall order and, while JJ is probably the person best qualified to give that to us, it doesn’t change how much of a challenge that is. It’s a lot. And… I am definitely sad about this being the end. Even if I love the movie and it’s amazing and lives up to all of my dreams, it will still end and this will be it. I honestly don’t know how I’m going to feel when that actually comes and it kinda scares me a little. But a satisfying ending would help soften the blow, so we shall see. Idk. I’m sad and a little scared just because of that, all other reservations aside

I think that’s all I’ve got for now? I’m excited for more and I don’t know if we’ll get much over the rest of celebration, but there might be snippets. I’d still like to see the Knights of Ren too, given that we’re pretty sure they’re in the movie but like… where? Lmao I want to know. Anyway. This is mostly word vomit, so don’t take it too seriously. My predictions could be way off base and we won’t know for a while so yeah. If you read this far, congrats and thanks for reading my rambling!

[loki-hargreeves]

Loki Imagine - Ready, Set, Past! [PART 4]

[PART 1] [PART 2] [PART 3] [PART 4] [PART 5]

Warning: Infinity War spoilers

Your P.O.V.

“Come on!” I almost cursed after that but I bit my lips together instead. The ring was probably laughing at me for failing although it was my hundredth attempt to use it. It just wouldn’t bug, making me feel like I was missing something important. The longer I was here, in the present, the more hopeless I began to feel. Somehow, I had a burden on my shoulders filled with guilt. Thanks to me, many of these had hope of getting their loved ones back. If I failed, I would let everyone down, including the dead. 

To make matters worse, two more people joined the team; Clint Barton AKA Hawkeye and Scott Lang who went by as Ant-Man. They both lost their loved ones thanks to Thanos’ finger-snap so here they were, both determined to do their best. It was just more pressure on me.

I was outside in the fields, surrounded by grass, trees, and overall gorgeous nature. It was as relaxing as it could get. Thor stood a few meters away, watching me closely as I tried to create a portal or something, anything useful really. Even I had no idea what I was doing! It was more than simply frustrating. Being the goddess of time and not being able to figure this out was a bit embarrassing too. 

“Do you know what you’re doing, Y/N?” Thor asked me a bit carefully, afraid he’d make me explode. Both Loki and I had bad tempers in such situations. Especially, when people kept asking us if we were done or if it was working. Truly, I wished Loki could be here now. So for a moment, I stopped doing anything. All I focused on were my nerves and my breathing.

I had to get it together.

After a minute or so, I was much calmer. “I’m close. I’ll figure it out any second now” I answered Thor’s question. He pulled his lips into a thin line and nodded, knowing better than most not to say anything dumb now. He had done so before and learned from his mistakes. That’s when something popped into my mind. I knew the time spells quite well. One of them was hard but it allowed me to create a window to look through either into the past or the future. They required a lot of energy and concentration and barely lasted longer for than ten minutes. If I did that and combined it with the strong energies with my ring, I could turn the window into a portal and make the Avengers go through it. I would go last and close it. 

“Tell the others to come, now” I gave Thor an order, which someone would find disrespectful since he was my king but we were also close friends. 

“Will do, Lady Y/N” Thor took the mission onto his shoulders, swung the Stormbreaker, and hurried back to the castle. I was left alone in the beautiful, big fields. This had to work. If not, I had no idea what would.

So I took a deep breath, allowing the air to fill my lungs until I exhaled through my mouth, slowly. My heart was beating faster so I had to stay calm. Suddenly, I felt ready. My heartbeat slowed down and I could breathe easily. My mind was focused on this and this only. So I put my feet on the ground steadily and I looked at my hands. I stretched them in front of me and opened my palms widely. I concentrated on my slow but sure movements as I moved my hands in circles, both going in different directions.

The past...It was in 2012...

My mind was set in the past, around the time of the Attack in New York. I thought about the date, the surroundings, the people in there. I put my palms together and slowly clenched my fingers so I was pinching the air. Last but not least, I thought of our forefathers’ ways, their powerful spells and I hoped they would bless me. I began to transfer the ring’s strong energy into my magic, combining the two, and I could feel it with my entire body. It was overwhelming and the magic drained my own energy.

Come on now.

I gritted my teeth together and began to drag my fingers away from each other, creating the window in mid-air. Once it was the size of a football, my ring sent light to it, making the edges of the window glow green. As I dragged it, making it big enough for huge men like Thor to fit in, the window morphed, becoming different than I remembered it to be.

The edges were blurred but now, I could see well through it. I saw an alley that looked a lot like New York. I could feel the wind from there and my hair began to flow with it. I smelled the dirty city air but I could smell smoke. I didn’t hear screams. So I assumed this was before the devastating attack. 

I couldn’t be happier. It worked! The ring was glowing and it turned the gold warmer. Luckily, I was too happy to let a little heat bother me. Just perfectly, I heard the group arriving, some gasping at the portal I was keeping open. “Hurry up! I can’t keep this open forever!” I told them through gritted teeth. 

“What time is it?” Tony asked me, looking through the portal curiously. 

“I’m not exactly sure. It feels like it’s a day or two before the attack” I admitted to him. Nobody was going through it yet.

“Come on! Ready, set, past” I encouraged them to move. Thor nodded and went through first. It seemed so easy, like walking through a door. Once he was on the other side, he looked at me and smiled. He seemed alright. Now that everyone saw it was safe, others began passing too. Tony went after Thor, then came Scott, Clint, Natasha, Nebula, Bruce, and Steve. I glanced over my shoulder to see if there were anyone else coming, but I saw no one. It was my turn.

I let go of the edges, knowing it would close in seconds. Then I jumped through it, feeling how the portal shut behind me, causing dust and papers to fly off the ground around us. Since I had kept a portal as strong as that open for so long, I felt exhausted. Without a time stone, these things were truly difficult, even for me. Tony noticed that I was out of balance and soon, he was supporting me by my shoulders. I took a deep breath and then thanked him.

“Did we really just travel in time?” Bruce breathed out in shock. I wasn’t 100% sure but I knew how to check that. I opened my palm and created a universal clock, setting it to Midgard. It showed us it was May 2, 2012, at 4 PM exactly. It was two days before the attack itself. 

“Yup, it worked” I confirmed the news to everyone before shutting the magic clock. I could use some sleep but I knew we had a lot to do. “No one can see us, okay? For now, it’s for the better if we don’t interfere with the past versions of ourselves. If we do interfere, it must be someone who doesn’t know you’re from the future. We need to get a place to stay first” I told everyone a basic time-traveling rule. Interfering with someone could be dangerous. But I knew I had to interfere with Loki sooner or later. 

“I’ll listen to the time lady” Nebula shrugged calmly. I noticed that Rocket hadn’t joined us. Neither had Rhodey because he had to contact some business people and keep things in order in the future. I believed that the fewer people we had, the better. 

“I have a place,” Tony told us. I wasn’t surprised. Loki had told me he was a rich snob who owned more houses than necessary. Right now, it was for the good. 

“Before we go..” I cleared my throat, not letting anyone out of sight yet. Then with my weak energy, I created illusion disguises on everyone. Their clothes changed pretty much into very ordinary black ones but the hoods and other accessories I created to hide their identities. Some got sunglasses, some got hoodies and someone got different hair. I was happy with my disguises but I didn’t need to do that to myself since I wasn’t even here that day. No one would recognize me.

“Ready, let’s go” Tony declared once we were done. Just like that, we followed Tony to whatever secret location he had. As we walked, I stayed near Thor just in case I’d pass out. Although we seemed calm and collected now, we would have a hell of a battle ahead of us. We had to get rest before that and somehow convince Loki he didn’t have to do this.

Perhaps Thor and I should work that one out. But according to Steve, Loki wasn’t even in New York. He was giving the people in Germany a speech about freedom just to get arrested. According to them, Loki wanted to get caught. Tomorrow our mission would truly begin.

Once we arrived at Tony’s hideout that just happened to be a penthouse in New York, we all planned what we would do. We got into groups that formed of two or three people. I was with Thor, Tony worked with Clint and Natasha, Scott teamed up with Bruce and Nebula. Once we all had good plans, we got into action. Some of us had to wait so we could rest.

The next day, Thor and I headed to our destination, the ship known as a ‘helicarrier’ where Loki was supposed to be in. We got up as I turned myself into a hawk and Thor used his Stormbreaker. The ship was hard to find since it was almost invisible to the naked eye, thanks to the panels that worked as mirrors. But we reached it. Once we were close enough, I sneaked us both inside and I disguised Thor as a guard. 

“You sure you can do this?” Thor asked me, knowing we were both going to see Loki again. He was supposedly in a huge cage. I was touched to know he cared, so I smiled and tried to seem as convincing as I could.

“Trust me, Thor, I couldn’t be more ready” I whispered softly. “Are you ready?” I wanted to know his feelings too. Thor simply nodded and finished it off with a smile. Seeing him with brown eyes, pale skin, and short black hair was odd. But it was good so no one could recognize him. He could also tell anyone who’d ask that I was supposed to be on board. I was so glad no one knew who I was. It made this all so much easier.

He led the way through these corridors, leading both of us to Loki. Well, past-Loki. I noticed that my heart began to drum wildly, harder than before. My palms got sweaty and my breath began to hitch in my throat. How could I possibly keep it together? How was I supposed to talk him over? Loki had been through abuse from Thanos and this was his darkest time. He was so depressed for so long after this. Just remembering the days he pushed us away broke my heart. Loki would do terrible things just to make sure he was alone, believing everyone would get hurt in his presence. Helping him out of that darkness had been difficult but definitely worth it, even if I would have to do it again and again, and again, I would. But I knew that right now, I had to focus.

As we walked through these grey corridors, someone met us. It was past-Steve. He stopped walking and he glanced at us with knitted eyebrows, clearly not recognizing us. Seeing him with short blonde hair and soft cheeks was odd. He had definitely gotten a rougher look in the future. Perhaps he didn’t care about Thor but he did seem interested to find out who I was. After all, I was wearing my battle armor and the green cape. “I don’t think we’ve met” Steve admitted, already examining me. Shit.

“I was called in to speak with Loki. I’m of Asgard, I might crack him” I tried to sound as convincing as possible. Steve huffed something and looked at Thor who was disguised as a random guard. Once he saw the SHIELD tag, he let it go. 

“Good luck, I assure you, it’s not easy” Steve wished me luck and then kept walking. He seemed like he had something else on his mind. I was glad he let us off the hook so we could continue.

We reached the end of the corridor and I saw a huge room with all kinds of buttons, machines and of course, the cage. Loki was sitting on a bench in there all by himself. His back was faced towards us but I recognized him easily. My heart skipped a beat and I almost started bawling but I forced myself to stay strong. I sensed that Thor grew tense beside me. After all, Loki was his brother. We would both love to go over there and shower him with love but we also knew Loki wasn’t in his best mind right now. 

Our plan was actually simple. I would talk to Loki, convince him to join our side, and then I would pull off Thor’s disguise. We would break him out of here and make him show us what he would’ve done. We would get the tesseract and everyone would meet at the Stark tower, hopefully before the Chitauri invasion. It was probably much easier said than done.

Here goes everything,

“Loki,” I said my husband’s name loudly, walking down some stairs so I could reach the cage. His head snapped to my direction and he froze once he saw me. His eyes were dark and he had bags under them. His skin was paler than before and overall, he looked miserable. Loki narrowed his eyes at me but kept quiet. I tried my best to seem fine but it was impossible. After I saw him dying, I considered this a miracle. I had glossy eyes and I had to held my breath to stay calm. Loki noticed my odd behavior, probably immediately. 

Once I reached the glass, I pressed my palm against it. Loki stood up and slowly walked closer to me. “What are you doing here? You were supposed to be..nevermind, what is it?” Loki stopped mid-sentence and growled the rest of it. Even his voice was deeper. It’s like everything about him was so dark, so sad. People thought it was evil but he was misunderstood and in a lot of pain. He didn’t know that I knew the truth. I knew Thanos was controlling him, forcing him to do these things.

But what mattered the most was that he was alive. I could barely believe it myself.

“Oh my god..” I breathed out in disbelief, failing to control myself. Loki raised his eyebrow and waited for me to speak. A tear rolled down the side of my face, tracing the huge bruise and the cut wound I got from Proxima Midnight’s spear. I realized that she was alive again which made me cringe. Loki gazed at my wound and I swear his expression softened. Soon enough, he placed his hand on the glass above mine. Although we didn’t touch each other, I felt him. It was an electric sensation that began from my fingertips and spread throughout my entire body.

“I didn’t want you to get involved like this, my love” Loki whispered very quietly. He used his other hand to do something and the next thing I knew, the security cameras broke and smoke came out of them. He didn’t want everyone to see his true self. 

“You don’t understand, Loki” I spoke just as quietly. He seemed confused, very confused by my words and actions. He probably noticed I had his cape as well.

“This...I know who’s behind it. I know it’s not you, Loki” I remembered I was on a mission and that we had a certain amount of time. Loki clearly heard what I said but he didn’t answer. He seemed to fall deep into his thoughts. He probably wondered how in the name of Odin’s beard I knew. To convince him further, I continued. “I know it’s Thanos,” I told him quietly but surely. Loki’s jade eyes widened and ha pulled his hand away from the glass. Loki was shocked.

“No, no..Y/N you can’t, you must leave!” Loki’s voice got louder. He seemed scared and upset about the fact I knew about it.

 “No, I won’t. I..Loki I don’t know how to explain this for you to believe me but I..fuck-” I got frustrated with myself for not being able to form a simple sentence. Every damn cell in my body screamed at me, telling me to hug him. I wanted nothing more than to embrace Loki and keep him safe. But I had to speak to him and break him out of this place.

Soon, I struggled to keep myself together. I leaned against the glass and took deep breaths. Keep it together, Y/N! 

“What..what is it, Y/N?” Loki clearly wanted to know why I was like this. For him, we had been separated ever since he fell off the Bifrost. He could’ve easily believed something had happened on Asgard. Well, that was true. Asgard was gone. But now, in this timeline, it was still in its full glory.

“I’m from the future” I finally said it. I wasn’t sure if Loki heard me but once I face him, I noticed he definitely heard me. His lips parted slightly and he stepped back so he could look at me from head to toe. I wasn’t sure if he was in disbelief, in shock, or both. After a while, he stared at the floor and chuckled by himself, like this was funny. 

“The future..” He murmured lowly. “You’re telling me there’s two of you? That I do like..” He was quick to hide all negative emotions with a witty thought and a smirk. I held my breath now, hoping for a better reaction than this. Loki wasn’t even able to face me.

“How many years did you travel?” Loki wanted to know. I didn’t know why that mattered so much but I was going to answer him nevertheless. 

“Six years, roughly. Everything is destroyed and it’s because of Thanos. I need your help” I revealed more important information that could make him change his mind about everything. Loki nodded but didn’t say anything. I sensed now that he wanted to help me but he was terrified. He didn’t have to say it. I knew he didn’t want anyone he cared about to get hurt. 

“It’s too late to stop him” Loki finally spoke. Damn it!

“No, no it’s not. We can do it. There is an infinity stone in your scepter and in the tesseract. Right now, Thanos has none. We can beat him” I worked hard to convince Loki. Yet, he didn’t seem to buy it. He shook his head no and began to walk in circles in there. It got to a point where I couldn’t just stand on the other side desperately. So I teleported myself inside the cage, right in front of him. Loki froze now, looking at me more softly. Neither one of us spoke as I hugged him, holding onto his waist tightly. This time, he didn’t perish away. It was him!

His scent calmed me down but it also made me more emotional. I thought I could never do this again. Eventually, Loki decided to hug me back. His mind was still in a dark place and I knew he tried to push people away but now, he didn’t. Loki knew I was upset and he seemed to believe me too, at least he tried to. Feeling his strong arms around me and his jaw on top of my head was everything I needed right now. We were far from finished with our mission but he was already putting my broken heart back to one. “You need to listen to me, Loki. You’ll..he’s..if you don’t, he’ll kill us all” I pulled the card out of my sleeve that had to work. Loki’s body stiffened once I finished my sentence.

Did I finally get him on the hook?

Loki lowered his head so his mouth was near my ear, so close that I could feel his breath on my skin. “He promised to kill you if I didn’t deliver the tesseract,” Loki told me with a small voice that no even Thor could hear. His confession broke my heart for this was something he didn’t tell me before. Was Loki doing all this because of me? Thanos had used me against him. It was more proof that Thanos was a disgusting and cruel being. Now that I knew, I felt so bad, guilty, and hurt. 

“You didn’t succeed, Loki. I don’t know what came over you but it was for the best. Just please, listen to me” I decided to be honest with him. Although my voice was shaky and I was on the verge of tears, I continued speaking. I turned around and nodded to Thor who had been very patient for a few minutes. We knew that someone would rush in here soon since the cameras broke so we had limited time to succeed. I took off Thor’s disguise as he walked over to us. Loki broke our hug and looked at Thor in surprise. “I hope you’re better in the future, brother” Loki chuckled, hiding his raw emotions he showed me a moment before. Thor examined Loki closely and he too was overwhelmed. 

“At least, you’ve changed for the better” Thor responded with brotherly love. Then he walked over to some buttons and pressed one. The door to this cage opened and we could leave. 

“Lead the way, Loki,” I told him and then grabbed his hand, pulling him close. I looked him straight in the eye and took a deep breath. “Don’t you dare trick us. This is important” I got serious with him. First, Loki looked at me just as seriously but he broke a smirk. 

“Why would I even try to deceive you, my love? You see right through me.” 

Just like that, the three of us had to hurry up before SHIELD agents and the past-Avengers would get on our backs. The first step was to get the scepter, then we could escape this helicarrier. And man, I truly wished I could trust this broken past-Loki. His trust could very well change everything.

[PART 5]

Author’s Note: Finally! Loki is in the story properly. What are your thoughts so far? :) I’m actually so excited for the future chapters now because this story got to the point I have waited for a while now.

TAGS:  @twigleektribute23  @stayunderthelights​ @pinkieperil@geeksareunique @deanskitten  @lokiscure @mtb04308@rowenathewitch1200 @metalpalace @1800-fight-me @qhbr2013@srtaprieto @fire-in-her-veinz @s0nh8dorasblog   @honeyicouldntthinkofaurl @rashinyx2002  @iraniq  @embrycallsgirl  @blackroseyaz @puddins-princess  @r-alexandra01  @yuna-belikova (let me know if you wish to be tagged or be removed from any tag list)

[charlyoddsox27]

its 6am, i havent slept, im bored, so im posting a list of the mercs in order of whom i like the most and reasons why, because thats something i should do i guess?

here goes

(spoilers for the comics down below but either way i think im the only person on earth who has never read them before now)

~~~

~~1. Medic~~

reasons for being my favourite:

• fucking. look. at. him. 👌

• 'mad german doctor' is one of my favourite tropes and he is a pretty bang-on satirical depiction of it

• cute-ass german accent

• he has pet pidgeons hE LOVES HIS PIDGEON PALS THEY KEEP HIM COMPANY

• healers are the most respectable class imo and since Medic pretty much started it he's automatically the best, thats how it works right?

• he sold some random persons soul to satan in exchange for a ***ballpoint pen*** and can i just say, fucking mood??? (he is literally the "i'd sell you to satan for one cornchip" meme)

• "yes, Archimedes...I couldn't agree more." *shudders* b oi .. .

• so many more reasons to love this gross old doctor so little room in Tumblrs posts.

~~2. Spy~~

reasons for being my second favourite:

• cranky, done with everyones shit, just wants to be left alone, fucking mood

• he's a spy i mean c'mon. look at the swanky-ass suit, look at the class radiating from this asshole.

• he may be a dick but he has a soft side he's just too jaded to show it most of the time (see: Scouts death in the comics?? real tears. honestly wish they'd panned that out more.)

• masks are hot tbFH--

• he enjoys a nice glass of whisky by the fireplace and so do i (fun fact: france is the biggest importer of scottish whisky in the world so its a nice touch)

• shapeshifting is fucking cool are you serious like he can just. do that. what a legend

• "i have a cyanide pill in one of my molars, if i break it then spit some in your mouth before i die, we can avoid being tortured." *'heavy' bursts in to save them* "PFFTHBTHF--"

• "SEDUCE ME."

• arrogant frenchman is one of my other favourite tropes and this is the most arrogant frenchman ive ever seen

• he's the only fully sane Merc, maybe apart from Engie.

• people love to hate him bc he's an asshole but...come on. after working with all those other weirdos for years, you'd be pretty jaded too.

• as a gross shipper, he's the easiest and the most fun (imo) to ship with Medic (rip me)

~~3. Pyro~~

reasons for being my third favourite:

• would have tied with Soldier if it werent for that one picture of them in the comics holding a puppy over their head with the most adoring expression on their mask??? good Pyro. goodest Pyro.

• doesn't do much in the comics but makes up for it in pure charm. look at that soulless face and tell me you dont love it.

• ambiguous gender ambiguous gender amBIGUOUS GENDER AMBIGUOUS GENDER. she/he/they? trans? nb? whatever you headcanon, it'll never be confirmed so its literally up to your own imagination. fucking ace, Valve 👌👌👌

• likes to burn things. god damnit. they like to burn things, guys. but they enjoy it so much, you just cant hate them, you can only feel a sympathetic joy that this precious lunatic is having fun in their own little world.

• canonically mentally ill (schizoprenia? it could be hallucinogenic drugs but i like to think its schizophrenia.)

• pretty sure they burned a pair of pedophiles in the comics. at least i think thats what those panels were insinuating. "lets open an orphanage and have an endless supply of kids to--" sounds pretty red-flaggy to me tbh. plus they were the villains so, eh?

• bludgeoned a bear to death until its skull was pulp because it insulted their special interest. you go, Pyro.

• for a few bits in the comics they have a really cute family dynamic going on with other Mercs, Soldier for example."Miss Pauling, Pyros on my side of the car." "Miss Pauling, Pyro cut off my hand." fuckin' cuties.

• when they start putting on like 50 shirts to keep warm in the Russian mountains. chubby.

• a gas mask that can function as both badass, and completely adorable.

• just. everything about them. how could you not love them. they're not in the wrong, you are. stay away from my misunderstood child and let them burn things god damnit.

~~4. Soldier~~

look I'm sorry, I love Soldier and he was gonna be tied with Pyro but that fucking puppy drawing sold me.

• absolute gold every second he speaks. he could sneeze and i'll laugh.

• such a dumbass you cant get annoyed at him for it. like. just agree with him and move on. no point reasoning with a boulder. "haha! silly Miss Pauling, thinking theres different types of blood." Medic: "haha yes! indeed, silly."

• HUTTAH *NECK SNAP*

• i'm not American and even i can see how blatantly his character mocks stereotypical Patriotic Americans™. but its so dumb and laughable, its adorable.

• EVERYTHING ABOUT HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH ZHANNA IS A BLESSING. EVERYTHING.

• the first "meet the Mercs" video i ever saw was "meet the Soldier" so he holds a special place in my heart

• (preaches about experiencing the horrors of war; has never actually been to war. shh dont tell anyone though--) *neck gets snapped*

~~5. Demoman~~

• I'm Scottish. even though his accent is absolute garbage (no offense to the VA), any representation is very nice.

• Black AND Scottish?? i mean has a character like that even existed before TF2??? amazing example of representation right there. there are barely even any black people in Scotland, how did this happen. I love it. more of this, please.

• he's a drunk guy who blows shit up for shits and giggles and god I wish I could too, sounds like a miracle stress-reliever.

• his sassy black scottish mother. combining the stereotypical black mother with the stereotypical scottish mother is literally the best thing that ever happened.

• the bit in the comic where Medic explains that Demo can't remember what happened to his eye bc he scooped out part of his brain, and the look on Demo's face. just. the look.

• again, he's scottish, he's stereotypical, and he's awesome.

~~6. Sniper~~

• underrated

• piss jars. piss jars everywhere.

• "no dad, im not a crazed murdering lunatic, I'm an assassin. ...well one's a job and the other's mental sickness!!"

• "meet the Sniper" has kickass music

• ruffled gross old man who isn't actually old, he's just seen some SHIT

• actually given development in the comics + some really good scenes with Spy.

• so suave...so...handsome. handsome ruffled bushman. me like.

• he dies first in the comics but gets brought back and gets a cool-ass scar. and then he's just walking around naked everywhere for the rest of the comic. Medic, where the fuck did you put his clothes.

• isn't actually Australian. thats like one of the biggest twists in the comic. "no wonder i was never inhumanly strong and my chest hair didn't grow into the shape of Australia!!" Classic.

• says "bugger" a lot and i love that word

• he needs a hug, let me hug him. and give him a bath.

~~7. Heavy~~

I'm gonna be crucified for putting the big lad so low but i promise i dont dislike any of the Mercs. he'd be higher up but...ive never really liked big huge tank-men tbh :/

• loveable as fuck

• will murder you if you bully his puny little Medic

• i looove Russian accents omfg

• he like big gun. i can respect that.

• when Medic was killed and he went APESHIT on Classic!Heavy and I lost my fuckin' mind over that shit

• he probably has a soft spot for small cute animals. i love imagining him being swarmed by Medics flock of doves and petting them like "good bird...so many good bird..."

• actually smarter than people give him credit for???

• i really really wish his character was a lil more fleshed out but. that's just me. i love him but he doesn't have the same appeal to me as Medic or Spy.

• his entire relationship with Medic...ugh. yes. best friends and/or boyfriends. all good to me 👌

• he named his gun Sasha and that's adorable

~~8. Engineer~~

• gOD, FUCK, I REALLY WISH HE DID MORE IN THE COMICS. i barely know anything about his character. i like him a lot but...god, he...he doesn't...do.....anything.......

• he built a cool robot arm for himself and AI turrets and teleporter machines and guns that fire magic healing powers and immortality machines, in the 1960s. what. some kind of wizard fuckery is this.

• smoothest voice in the west

• "y'all"

~~9. Scout~~

oh god i really am gonna be crucified. i dont hate him i just. like him the least.

• shitboy

• reminds me of a shitty ex but also kinda relateable in a way

• some genuinely funny bits in the shorts.

• gross horny hetero teen boy with a god complex and serious daddy issues. also, he can't read. the "sex bom" tattoo on his chest will be an eternal testament to that. nice job, Spy. you raised him good.

~~~

hoo boy there we go theres all the boys, all the beautiful boys (and Scout) in order of how much i love them. if i made any errors in my info about the canon, feel free to send me death threats 💙 (no seriously tell me though, being a newbie is embarrassing)

so uh. yeah. that took two hours to write. its now 8am. im still bored lol. bye i guess.

[betweenbeatriceandbaudelaire]

Top 10 underrated ichihime moments - Part 2

Part 1 

5 )The hand reach 

Come on could Kubo be more obvious ? 

This right here refers to the Tanabata legend which is often referenced when it comes to ichihime ( this post will explain it to you ) . I mean here you have two not yet lovers reaching out to each other in the sky ? Come on . 

Kubo is not being subtle at all with his references to Tanabata and that is amazing . That being said this moment is also great because it kinda symbolizes the way ichigo and orihime act around each other . During the course of the manga there were so many moments were ichigo and orihime wanted to reach out to the other but didn’t allow themselves to . I mean basically this moment represents the way they act around each other . Trying to reach out but ultimately not being completely able to do it and in the end not ending together . Next moment on the list perfectly illustrate what I’m trying to say here .

4 )Ichigo tries to apologize to orihime

They both look so miserable here it’s hurting me . 

Anyway as I was saying pictured above is one of the many many many many times ichigo and orihime wanted to reach each other but didn’t allow themselves to . I mean if they both didn’t put barriers between them and the other they would be able to speak freely what they want to say . 

Ichigo probably wants to say something like “ It hurts me to see you hurt orihime and I believe it is my fault you got injured so bad and I will train relentlessly until I’m strong enough to protect you and make it so that you won’t ever be hurt again” Well this dork when rukia pushed him into talking he said all of that by “ Next time I will definitely protect you” which is amazing because this sentence contains all the things left unsaid too . 

And Orihime probably wants to say “ Ichigo I’m sorry I was a liability to you . It tears me apart to see you hurt and I wish so bad I could be strong enough to protect you and take your pain away” . 

Instead ichigo cannot even get the nerve to finish his sentence “ it’s nothing” and orihime tries to fake a smile and minimize her injuries to try to erase ichigo’s guilt over her being hurt “ It doesn’t hurt one bit”. 

I mean it’s killing me because THESE KIDS DON’T TALK TO EACH OTHER FREELY . They want so bad the other to be happy and safe and they would both literally give everything to attain that goal but they’re both so shy and awkward and believe they aren’t good enough for the other to ever return their love that they forbid themselves to let that love show . They always held back when they are together . In every single of their interaction there is this desire to reach out but at the same time this limit they fix themselves . They can help and protect the other , and tease and hang out with the other but they ALWAYS forbid themselves to go too far . To make their feelings known . There is always this willing restraint to their interaction which makes shipping them excruciatingly painful . 

They are both so modest and have such huge self issues they never believed they deserved the other . I’ve seen ichiruki shippers saying ichihime “felt fake” because a lot of big steps in their relationship were provoked with outside help ( ichigo promising orihime he would protect her because Rukia pushed him into doing so , Nell saying to Orihime ichigo needed to hear her cheering for him , urahara making the dress, renji telling ichigo to confess ) . BUT THAT WAS THE POINT . Ichigo and orihime are biased in the way they see the themselves and their relation with the other . If you left them to their own devices they would carry on loving the other from afar because they both believe the other deserve so much more than themselves . They need other people to help them recognize the clues of mutual feelings as such . 

Ichigo and orihime are such a great match because they are both self sacrificing  . That is at the very core of their being . Ichigo basically risk everything he has every single battle he had to do in order to protect other people and orihime does the same ( going to Hueco Mundo to protect her friends ) . I mean they are both extremely different in term of personality because like ichigo is “ a punk” and has a harsh temper and orihime is bubbly and eccentric but they’re the same to their core where it really matters . They both would give everything to protect others , they both are deeply compassionate people , they both lived great tragedies as kids which shaped their adult selves . Ichigo and orihime are very much alike where it matters : values . That’s why ichihime was SUCH a slow burn ship because they both suffered self esteem issue and we saw them get closer and more playful with each other only once those were resolved ( at the end of the fullbring arc ) . 

Sorry I kinda strayed away from the point here but ichihime moments cannot be appreciated in a vaccuum . Ichihime is not a ship made out of very big love declarations and life turning moments . It’s a ship about two people who grew together side by side during their formative years so each ichihime moment has no value in itself it can only be appreciated when it’s linked to other ichihime moments and placed back into the context of the 686 chapters of Bleach . 

3 ) Orihime’s memories being changed by Tsukishima 

Well this moment is not per se “ underrated” because the fandom does like it but I feel like this is such a HUGE moment for ichihime , and while loved, this moment isn’t as talked about as the fandom as it should be . 

I wrote those tags a few years ago before ichihime became canon and honestly while part of it is a headcanon I still stand by it .  This was the first time ichigo realized orihime could be taken away from him for real . Before when she was taken away ichigo knew that by being strong enough he would be able to rescue her . His struggle was wether he was strong enough or not . Here it is different . Ichigo is already strong enough to defeat Tsukishima but even defeating is no guarantee his friends will go back to normal . Let me remind you that ichigo , OUR ICHIGO who showed mercy to all his adversaries including Aizen was ready to kill Tsukishima if it mean it had a tiny chance of bringing his friends back . I mean actually KILL . This tells you how shaken ichigo was by this . 

I believe here is the first time ichigo said to himself that he has lost orihime for good . In a way seeing orihime healing Tsukishima and opposing him had the same effect on him than orihime seeing him with a hole in his chest during the Ulquiorra battle . That’s the moment they’ve said to themselves “ that’s it , they’re gone, I’ve lost them” . Of course ichigo having a hole in his chest seems much more definitive than having orihime’s memories changed that’s why ichigo looks like part of it still can’t fully believe this is happening . He looks like he keeps repeating to himself “ this can’t be happening” but it is his reality now and it is happening . This moment shook ichigo to his core and made him realize orihime being by his side was not granted . 

And we see ichigo’s behavior towards orihime changed after this moment . He allowed himself to be much more closer to her after this . Of course because he regained his powers after this arc and feels he’s strong enough to protect her now but also because he knows what it feels like to have orihime slip away from him so he treasures more the time he spends with her . 

I love this moment and to me it is one of the turning point of the evolution of ichihime as a pairing and I wish the fandom would recognize it as that . 

2) Ichigo reflecting on the compassion shown by orihime 

So for this one I will quote this post because honestly this is exactly what this scene is about and I could never express it better myself : 

“It also helped Ichigo grow as a protagonist to see how she dealt with it. I think Ichigo’s always been so empathetic, but when it came to her he turned very unforgiving. Like “oh they all deserved it I couldn’t care less!” (and they did),when she didn’t feel that way towards them herself. Seeing her compassion made him question his own attitude, and I really think this is often forgotten.”

I mean honestly I could add stuff but this is so succinct and so on point there’s really not much for me to add . Ichigo and orihime grow side by side and they both admire the other so of course they are inspired by the other . 

Also you can notice that in his mind ichigo sees orihime’s back while he is talking about her face so he should be remembering what her face looked like at that moment . But I believe this is a parallel of Orihime often seeing ichigo’s back during battle .Kubo’s been lovely enough to make us a cute little montage of all those times . 

Orihime sees his back because he’s in front of her and she’s trying to catch up . Seeing his back from afar like that shows her admiration for him . Often he is taking up all the space within the panel to further the idea that what he’s like in her mind . Here we have ichigo watching her back . He is the one watching from afar , admiring her . Ichigo always admired her strength and resilience but most of all her compassion . And while Kubo showed up very often orihime admiring ichigo because he is the main character and because Kubo chose to make the reader see through orihime’s point of view A LOT , we do not have a lot of moment where we see that this admiration goes both way because we rarely have ichigo’s insight . Often we see his battles through someone else point of view ( like the Bach fight was seen through orihime’s point of view ) . But sometimes we get to know what ichigo is thinking and what he is feeling and during those times Kubo always takes the time to remind us just how much of a good person ichigo is . Here for example he is reflecting on orihime’s compassion and during the fight against Aizen he was reflecting on Aizen’s loneliness . Ichigo is deeply compassionate and so is orihime . And this is the quality they admire the most in each other . 

1 ) Ichigo and orihime biting their tongues during the Fullbring arc

I already made a post about this moment here but let me put things back into context : 

Ichigo lost his powers during 17 months and was absolutely miserable being powerless because it meant he couldn’t protect his friends anymore . When Ginjo came and give him a chance to get his powers back he took it immediately but he didn’t tell his friends because he wanted them safe and protected because this time if they got involved in supernatural stuff he wasn’t strong enough to protect them . Despite this Chad decides to bring orihime to heal ichigo during his training . 

Chad tells him ( and us by the same occasion ) that he knew he didn’t want orihime to be involved in this because he didn’t want her to be in danger . But ichigo says nothing and just makes this face : 

A few chapters later orihime heals ichigo despite knowing that her healing him just means he will ultimately gets hurt again . She then smiles this sad smile : 

When they make those faces both are biting their tongues and not saying what they want to say . Both want to protect the other SO MUCH and if they had their way they would make it so the other would never be hurt again . But they know what they want is not the most important . They must let the other want what they want ( community reference y’all ) . 

Ichigo knows orihime wants to help so badly . So even though her being here means she might get hurt he says nothing and accept her decision because he respects her and her wishes . 

It’s the exact same with orihime . During those 17 months powerless orihime must have been relieved to see he was safe . But she also saw how miserable he is . She knows him so she knew he would gain back his powers because he is a protector at his core . So even though helping him regain his powers means he will get hurt again she just smiles and say nothing . 

They let the other want what they want . 

Because their whole relationship is based on respect and love . It doesn’t matter what they want . What matters is that the other is happy and fulfilled . And this moment , while not groundbreaking in itself manage to sum up everything that is good about ichihime . Love , respect , tenderness . 

-------

So here you go people , I hope you enjoyed it ! Don’t hesitate to comment with your own underrated ichihime moments or anything you might want to say ! 

[gassyboybuttlover]

A Faceful at Vidcon

Entry 1

Dear Diary,

Hi, I'm Drake Smith. I'm a tall and muscular black man that has a few secrets. One, is that I'm a shape-shifter who can change his appearance whenever I feel like it(except for my natural appearance, and I can only stay as someone for so long, I will get excruciating cramps and pains). Two, is that I have a certain crush on a youtuber with a big ass and three is that I have a fart fetish. The only problem is that the youtuber(Josh) is straight, so I will have to transform into a female to get him. And that is if I get a chance to even talk with him. Anyways wish me luck.

Entry 2

Dear Diary,

It was the first day of Vidcon and I transformed into the woman. I became short with the classic hourglass figure. I have big ol' tits and a hot ass with a tiny was waist. I didn't get to see him actually. He apparently wasn't here today, but I did get to meet some of his friends, Tyrone, Elliot, Elijah, and Moses. I think they will soon hook me up with him, since they know I'm interested.

Entry 3

Dear Diary,

It was day two of vidcon and today I finally got to meet Josh! He was shorter that I imagined, only 5' 7" and he had bad acne, but he said it only lasts a little bit. Elliot then commented "If your whole life is just a little bit; then yeah, I would say that's accurate,". We all laughed but I saw that Josh blushed out of embarrassment. I think he blushed because of me because we were in an empty corner of vidcon, so I was the only odd-ball. Regardless, tomorrow is the last day to sleep with Josh and I say that I have a pretty good chance.

Entry 4

Dear Diary,

I have to write this quick, because I invited Josh over to my place and he will be here in ten minutes! So, what happened today was just regular "at vidcon stuff" but it was just me and Josh. It wasn't grew because he made me walk in front of him. Probably checking out my ass, but I wanted to look at his, but getting a day with him wasn't all that had either. We bought merch, went to panels, and we went to Chipotle afterwards. He asked me what I wanted, but I needed him to eat foods that would make him gassy. So, I ordered two burritos with extra beans. At first they denied but I swayed the cashier a little bit and he made it happen. After we got out food I took a bite and said that it wasn't good and passed it to Josh and he ate one and saved the other for later. My plan was going perfectly, so I made my move and invited him to my hotel room. He agreed and he is now on his way!

*Out of diary*

After I finished the passage I began to have cramps, "Shit! Why now body," I said to myself. The cramps meant I will have to transform back, but they weren't suppose to come up until tommorrow. Then the worst happened. I heard a knock at my door and look through the peephole and it was Josh! "Hello, is anyone in there?" He said excitedly while the finishing the burrito from earlier. I began to run around and panic but he could hear me. "Hello, I can hear you running around in there," he said. I had no choice but to open the door.

"Hi," he said and hugged me. I quickly reached down and grabbed his cheeks. They were so soft and squishy and felt like a water bed. He was suprised when I did that but I looked at him and smiled. "Come on in," I said. He walked in and his butt just jiggled so beautifully and elegantly. Sliding in between each other.

"Wow! Nice room!" He said to me. "Unlike me. The guys pulled a prank on me and I was booked in a 1-star hotel that was complete shit. I couldn't even go in the bathroom cause the water was broken. I haven't taken a shit in a while, and I poop like twice a day!" He turned around at me with his gorgeous sea blue eyes. We stared at each other for a little bit until cramps hit me. "Uh, I'm sorry," I said trying to hide my cramps. "Don't be, it wasn't your fault," he said back to me. "So, you want to start?" I said to quickly get it over with. "Sure," Josh eagerly said back to me.

He was fast at taking off his clothes. He had his underwear off by the time I was just taking off my pants. I still had my make up on so I asked if I could take it off real quick. He said, "Go on ahead. I can wait," I really wasn't taking off my make up I was looking for my pain killer medicine perscribed to me by the agency I work for. They weren't there and I could see in the mirror that Josh was looking at me stroking at his already hard cock. It was bigger than I expected, probably around eight inches, but his ass was the real star of the show with me being able to see his perfectly smooth ass making a butt groove into the bed sheets.

This is where I thought I should make my deal. "Josh, I want you to do something for me while we are... doing it." I started off with. "What? I will do... a lot of things for you," he replied with. "I have a fart fetish and I want you to fart in my face," I said that while looking down and when I looked up at him his face was pure confusion yet excitement. "Oh, okay," he finally said after thinking about it for a minute or two. "Just warning you I haven't shit in a few days, so whatever comes out, comes out." He finished with and I was so excited.

Then all of a sudden a huge cramp hit me rendering me paralyzed for a second and falling to the floor. I screamed in pain and Josh came over to aid me. "What's happening?!" He yelled at me. "My medication is in the drawer on the right of the bed," I told him and he went to look for it, but it was too late.

I transformed slowly back into my normal self and I stood up holding the thong that I was using, to cover up my now-present dick. Josh was still around looking for the medication and his ass was so sweaty from panicking. I then stood up, all 6' 4" of muscular, me. I quickly for an erection from seeing Josh's ass. It was so hot and thick, even when bending over I still can't see his hole.

"Hey, I think I got them," Josh said as he turned around. He looked up and was me in all my glory and bolted towards the door. I caught before he could reach it and threw him on to the bed. "Who are you?!" He questioned. "I'm Drake. The girl you were dating. I'm a shapeshifter I diguises myself as her, so I could fuck you." Josh looked extremely confused and tried to get pass me, but it failed. He then ran into the bathroom and told me stay quiet for a while.

I then admitted defeat and sat on the bed next to Josh's butt groove and began to smell it. It was musky and smelled awful, but I loved it and I began to get hard again except for my cock looked longer. It was once eleven inches but now it looked more like twelve.

Josh than stepped out and saw my face in his butt groove and how big my cock was. "Hey, even though you lied. You are still pretty hot as a boy." He said. "I thought you were straight," I replied to him with. "Want to find out for sure?" He said back to me.

I quickly scooted on to the bed and he turned around and backed his ass on to me. "You ready?" He asked. "Yes," I said. His ass was only an inch away from my face and the smell was already bad. I still could not see his asshole, and it smelled as if he never cleaned his ass in his life. And then it began.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTT

Josh let out the worst smelling fart in history, and it was loud too. The gas had immediately filled my lungs with toxins that I loved. He began to blow me and me cock seemed to be growing. It now felt like thirteen inches and he was going pass the mid-point of my dick and he kept farting with me blowing through a load every time he does.

"Here comes a big one," he said to me with my dick in his mouth.

FFFFFFFFFFPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPLOLOPLOP

It sounded wet and disgusting, like bubbles were coming out of his ass. Ten whole minutes of pure delight.

"Watch out this might be a turd," Josh warned me. He then grunted.

And he was right. The biggest shit I've ever seen come out of a human being, has left his ass. It seemed to split his ass right down the center and was soft and mushy with some consistency to stay solid. It was propelled by large amounts of gas behind it and it landed directly on my face. It was completely covering my face. My penis grew even more to fourteen inches and I decided to pay there eating at the pudding-like shit for a while until moving the shit to the side. "Josh get your ass on my dick now!" I ordered him. "Okay." He sounded as if he was up to something. Josh lifted his ass and then sat down with all his force straight on to my face, completely submerging me in his ass. And he let out the most rancid, raunchy, and toxic fart into my face suffocating me in it. The fart lasted for three minutes, and was solid expulsion into my nose, mouth, and eyes. It felt like I was about to pass out and my dick grew to fifteen inches. And he got up and squatted over my dick and sat down.

My dick was five inches pass his cheeks until it finally reached the asshole. And then Josh sat down all the way, and I was balls deep in him and he let out the biggest moan I have ever heard. I soon felt something deep within him. I told him about this and he replied with, "You really thought I was done with the shits?" And Josh started bouncing up and down on my dick and soon the poop was at his hole and he was at the top of my dick and as soon as he started sitting, he covered my dick. Wow, Josh is on my dick and covered it all with shit and began to bounce again. I think I grew again to sixteen inches inside him and I told, "Let's do doggie style. I want to do the work," and Josh obeyed staying balls deep and I began to break his ass and Josh's low moaning became huge, loud and frequent. All I could here was Josh moaning, his ass clapping, and me grunting after going through my twelfth load of the night. Josh said he began to shit again and I felt it and it came out around my dick again.

This went on until dawn and when we were finally too tired to carry on. Josh said "Last one," and I dove for his ass completely blocking everything out and getting to his hole. It was dark, humid and full of shit and I heard him grunt and it was smelliest, loudest, and longest one yet.

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRTTTTTTSSSSSSSSSSSSSPLPLPPOOOLPLPPOLPLOP

Lasting for a whole hour and all I saw in his stretched out hole was a big, brown turd. When it hit me, the thing went everywhere in me. It went into my mouth and nose and I could hear the muffled laughing of Josh. The smell was too much and I passed out. When I awoke Josh was gone, but there was a note in my hand. It was a number and it said, "Call me."

[sam-i-am-27]

When Dreamscapes Cross - Pt 1

Summary: After a long day of panels and fans at a convention, all Thomas wanted was some good nights rest. But not even in the dreamscape did he imagine meeting more Sides, and from two others with ‘Sides’ of their own, nonetheless. 

Word Count: 2316

Pt. 2 Pt. 3 Pt. 4 Pt. 5 Pt. 6

“It was great to meet you all and I wish I could just give you all a hug and give you all the time I could to personally talk to you, but I’m out of time. So for now, take it easy my gals and non-binary pals. Peace out!” Thomas said, smiling at the resounding cheers that came from this. He waved goodbye one last time and exited backstage, feeling like he was on Cloud 9. The entire room had been packed to the brim with beaming fans, each of whom had supported his work for the past few years and today he had got the chance to thank them. He just wished his friends could have been there since they were a huge part of the turnout, but they had other priorities. Thomas would have to send them all the videos and pictures he had gotten of what had just happened. 

He collapsed on a random chair and ran his hands through his purple hair, a broad grin spreading across his face. No matter how many times he got on stage, no matter how often he looked at what his fans did in support for him, he couldn’t get over the rush and happiness it brought him. There were no words to describe how amazing it was, but if there was, he’d use it far too often.

“That was great!” Thomas jumped a little as Patton appeared next to him, sitting on top of a stack of boxes, legs crossed and eyes watery. 

“Aw, Pat, are you alright?” Thomas asked softly. 

“I just have a lot of feelings,” his morality replied, wiping his eyes on his cardigan sleeve.

“I must agree with Patton,” Roman said, popping up directly next to Thomas. “Those fans care so much about what we do and that was the perfect mix of drama, excitement and love. And must I say that your singing was on-point, Thomas.”

“Thank you, Roman,” Thomas responded. 

“I believe that in approximately ten minutes you have a backstage ‘meet-up’ with some of your admirers who paid extra money to meet you,” Logan interrupted, popping up next to the exit looking as formal as ever. 

“Yes, I know, Logan. I was just catching my breath,” Thomas said. “What’d you think of that?” 

“It was something we rarely do so it was, of course, unpredictable, but I found it rather enjoyable,” Logan replied simply. “It was organized to the point that you knew what was going to happen next but had just a touch of creativity-”

“Yes, that was my doing.”

“... as I was saying, enough, how do I say it... well to put it simply, there was a certain element to it that was explainable and yet enjoyable,” Logan continued, glaring at Roman. 

“Well I’m glad that you liked it. I know how much you like your organization so I tried my best to stay on schedule,” Thomas said. “How about Virgil, what did he think?”

“Oh, he’s a little tired right now,” Patton said. 

“With this being such a new kind of performance, it took a little more out of him than it does with a normal theater production,” Logan explained. “He is currently recuperating in his room but he promised to be out as soon as his energy was back again.”

“Oh I’m sure he will. Can’t drag that ray of sunshine down,” Roman said. “I guess we’ll be there helping him recover until he’s ready to come out of his room. Cheerio!” 

“Remember not to be late to the ‘meet-up’ in approximately eight minutes,” Logan said, sinking back into Thomas’s mind. 

“I’ll be making baking and the cookie is out!” Patton said, starting to fade away.

“Not your best one, Pat,” Thomas said. 

“Yeah I know...” Patton replied as he disappeared. Thomas sighed and leaned back, chuckling slightly as he imagined Roman, Logan and Virgil bickering as Patton tried to get them to eat chocolate chip cookies. Roman would try to pass them up in order to keep himself as healthy as possible but would give in eventually because even Roman couldn’t ignore cookies. Logan would have a very similar reaction and might even pull a Patton and steal a second one. Virgil would take one without question. Cookies always calmed him down after a live performance. He made a mental note to stop and get some after the meet-up... or did Logan? 

Thomas sighed, knowing those types of questions wouldn’t be answered simply but he could at least rely on his Sides to keep him in check. 

There had been more people than Thomas thought there were going to be and each one had more than one piece of amazing art. This unfortunately meant that he had to use a laundry basket to carry it all up to his hotel room, which earned him a glance or two. Not that he minded; if people were looking at him because of the art, that was fine. It was amazing to see the type of commitment each of them put into their art and if people saw it, that was more than anyone could ask for. 

After a little struggle of getting through into his hotel room, he was finally able to relax. He set the artwork on the table and then collapsed onto the bed, his eyes stinging from tiredness. 

“You should probably post on Snapchat that you’ve finished and that you have returned to your hotel room,” Logan said, popping up next to the table. 

“Yeah...” Thomas groaned, grasping at the phone in his pocket clumsily. 

“But first, I would brush that rats nest that you call hair,” Roman added, appearing on the arm of the couch already holding a hair brush. Thomas sighed and took the brush, using one hand to brush his hair and the other to open the app. Just before he started the video, he heard Logan give a little cough. 

“Yeah?” 

“You, uh, forgot to pick up a snack on your way back here,” Logan said pointedly. 

“I will, don’t worry. Just let me get this posted and then... I can ask Room Service to bring one up for me including some dinner,” Thomas mumbled. 

“That would just cost extra money. Just go down there and get the food personally,” Logan said. 

“But he’s tired and needs his sleep. Going all the way downstairs for a cookie that might be there is pointless when sleep is so much more important!” Roman argued. 

“Logan, it won’t cost that much so I’m going to order the cookie from Room Service because I’m too tired to actually go down. I won’t order any more food than that ‘cause I’ve got some extra food from yesterday’s meal. Roman, I won’t have it all. Like half of it or something. Sound good?” Thomas asked. 

“I guess,” Roman replied. 

“It is an acceptable compromise,” Logan said and began to fade away. “Enjoy your snack, Thomas.”

“Bye, Logan,” Thomas said. 

“Thomas if you want to, go ahead and eat it all,” Roman said. “I’m sure that Patton will insist on you eating all of it no matter what the others say.”

“That’s true, sorry,” he said and waved as Roman disappeared. He sighed and called up the front desk. While waiting for the food, he took a quick Snapchat photo captioned ‘Panel and Meet-and-Greet finished! Thank you to everyone who attended and for all the support you all give!”

He smiled again and started taking individual photos of the art he had received. To him, every piece deserved to be in a museum but to others they would be deemed ‘childish’. He smiled as he photographed a creative picture of Joan made out of dyed macaroni. He could imagine Joan getting to hold it and jumping around happily, happy tears pouring down their face. He was sure that every time his heart soared as he looked through the art, that his Sides were cheering and critiquing it. 

By the time his cookie arrived, all the art had been sorted, photographed and forwarded to his friends. 

“No tip for you,” he muttered as he closed the door and took a bite of the cookie. He moaned in delight as it almost literally melted in his mouth, the bittersweet chocolate mixing perfectly with the sweet dough. “Okay... maybe there will be a tip.”

The cookie was gone within seconds and his tiredness had returned in full. Not even fighting it, he tugged a blanket over himself and instantly fell asleep.

Usually, when he fell asleep, he would float around in darkness for a while as his mind sorted everything that happened that day. Sometimes he could catch glimpses of the Side’s rooms or hear snippets of what was being said. After this, the darkness would form whatever his Sides had deemed appropriate for that night’s dreams. Most of the time, he could tell which one had created the dream (most of the time it was Roman) but others it was an obscure mess of color with no meaning. Those were usually the days where the events had taken more of an emotional toll on all of them. They were becoming rarer but they still happened.

Tonight, none of this happened. There was the darkness but it lasted barely a second before it was replaced with a physical setting that was far too detailed and perfect to be real.

Thomas looked around the strange living room, unsure of what was happening. Everything was detailed to perfection- when he bent down to study the carpet, he could see the stray strings coming out of the lumps. The room was set up similar to his own living room but it was far more spacious. The couch was larger and newer-looking, the kitchen had two stoves, a large refrigerator and an alcohol cabinet. There were multiple shelves covered in vinyls and toys but unlike his house, there were multiple characters from more mature video games than he had. They contrasted heavily against his Steven Universe plushies. It was strange...

“Guys?” he called out, his voice echoing strangely. It was exactly how his mind-palace sounded before he got the echo fixed.

He sat down on the couch, wringing his hands nervously. “If this is some new type of dream, I’m not really liking it!”

There was a thump from upstairs and multitude of yells of shock. Thomas recognized those yells as his own and raced upstairs. Sure enough, his Sides were all in a tangled mess in his now expanded bedroom.

“Guys, are you alright?” Thomas asked and helped Patton to his feet instinctively. The all realized the same thing at the same instant. Thomas had just touched Patton and they had all been physically touching each other without an illusion.

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” Virgil whispered. Even Patton couldn’t hide a look of fear as he cautiously helped Roman to his feet. Thomas noticed Virgil was now sitting on the bed, his legs curled up to his chest and his eyes closed as he breathed in the 4-7-8 method. The panel had already taken so much out of him and now this was happening; it was too much. 

“Patton... can you help Virgil?” Thomas asked softly. Patton nodded and immediately sat next to Virgil, whispering to him softly and talking to him in a calming tone. Thomas jerked his head towards the door and Roman and Logan followed him out. 

“So this isn’t your doing? This house?” Thomas asked nervously.

“Of course not!” Roman replied, offended. “I was actually trying to recreate the feelings you got from the experiences today but with puppies o-or cats.”

“But Thomas is allergic-”

“I know, Poindexter! I would have allowed him to be with them without reacting,” Roman replied.

“Well then what’s happening?!” Thomas asked. They all jumped at the clattering that came from downstairs. The three men looked at each other and then rushed downstairs. Where Thomas had woken up there were now seven identical men, the only thing distinguishing them being their clothing, skin and voices. 

“Ah, get off me, Chase!” one said in a heavy German accent. 

“Sorry, brah! Ow! Robbie, that was my dick!” ‘Chase’ groaned to which a groan was received. Thomas and his Sides shared a look as the group of men untangled themselves with a slew of swear words. It seemed to be quite difficult for them since there were so many and they didn’t seem to understand how to properly escape. There was a low growl from somewhere in the pile that sent a shiver up Thomas’s spine. 

“Such language!” Roman commented. Thomas wasn’t quite sure whether he was impressed, offended, or both. He and his friends had never been ones to swear so hearing this amount of swearing in one place with one word being said more often than the others was strange and almost painful to hear. But there was something familiar about it all. Many of them had the same voice but Thomas couldn’t put where he had heard it. 

There was a crash and a loud scream. Patton burst through the door, looking shaken and pale. His glasses were askew on his face and he was gaping like a fish. 

“What is it, Patton?” Logan asked. “Is it Virgil?”

He shook his head and opened the door wide. Inside, Virgil was curled up against the headboard, staring at the person who had just appeared with wide-eyed. Thomas looked at the man and felt his heart drop when he realized that he knew this person. Newly died brown hair, a scruffy beard a little bit redder than his hair, and an Irish accent weaving through every curse word spilling from his mouth. 

“What the shit is happening?!” Jacksepticeye yelled and then looked up. His eyes flickered between the three men, then to Virgil, and back to Thomas. 

“Oh... fuck...”

“Yup...” Thomas agreed softly. 

Uh... yeah! 

I got inspired by @ironwoman359‘s Sander’s Sides, Markipier Egos, and Jacksepticeye Ego crossover! 

https://ironwoman359.tumblr.com/post/168913513403/prompt-sanders-sides-meet-the-septic-egos-thomas

I got a bit planned for this and it won’t be super long but it’ll be a fun project if I go through with it!

Go read it and follow her! It’s so good and she’s got some really good content! 

Uh if you do read this, please comment or something. 

Have a good day!