#i PLANNED her cancelling so i could eliminate the only other girl coming. that wouldn’t really make sense anyways since she’s gay + not

[akechi-if-he-slayed]

fuck my stupid tumblrina life

[juniaships]

After being reminded of how awful canon film is I wrote my own self indulgent version of Batman Vs. Superman. I want the story to be self contained, so no Doomsday or Darkseid forewarning. Warning: Rambling, me being butthurt while high on sugar, really trying to make this a coherent storyline with genuine development, some Bruce x OC moments shut up you demon!

The beginning is the same as in canon with Lois in Africa???Middle East??? With her partner James Olsen trying to resolve a hostage situation. James gets killed trying to protect a hostage, but before anymore are killed Superman comes in and rescues them. He subdues not kill the terrorists but gets into trouble with the intelligence agency for interrupting their mission. This incident reaches the ears of Helen Hunt's character the no-nonsense Senator. However Superman is more concerned for the deceased James and the unharmed hostages than getting in trouble with the government, he feels guilty being unable to save James in time.

After James Olsen's funeral Clark and Lois are unsure what to do next. They decide the best way to honor his memory is continuing their line of working bringing light to troubling issues as well as a troubling rose of villains. They also find out that the terrorists had weapons given to them by Luthor (to protect interests in that region).

Meanwhile, Lex decides to capitalize on the post destruction of Metropolis by launching a smear campaign. He also starts pursuing charitable events to make himself look good in front of the masses. Because of growing negativity towards Supes, Clark starts feeling a lack of confidence but from reassurance from his mom he redirects his focus hero by doing small stuff around Smallville. Gradually the town starts to see him in a far better light but there's still Metropolis and the larger world. Clark goes there to help rebuild. At his job at DP, he gets the chance to interview visiting millionaire Bruce Wayne in Whatever City (not the actual name but a totally different city from Metropolis and Gotham). At the press meeting Bruce is rather cold & not as Clark expected. He's even working with Lex Luthor as part of a business deal, which makes Clark wary as he knows about Luthor's criminal activity.

Superman goes out in a flight to clear his head. While flying around he sees a kid walking on the railroad tracks hy himself with a pair of headphones....and a train steadily approaching! Supes swoops in and saves the kod from being nuked and chastises him for being so reckless. The teenager apologies and introduces himself as Jimmy Olsen (a nephew of the deceased James). He had been listening to music as a way to cope with his uncle's death. They talk for a while and Superman brings Jimmy back home. Several weeks later Clark ends up mentoring Jimmy as a school project.

Back in Whatever City we're introduced to one of Lex's assistants Nicola. She's a former Holliday Girl who had overheard Lex's plan and vowed to stop him. She managed to get in contact with an old friend: Diana Prince. Nicola brings up Lex's plan and hidden research of metahumans. The Amazon surmises that such a scheme could result in the deaths of hundreds if not thousands of people. Diana decides to bring her agency to stop him & asks Nicola to stay low. Diana gathers her old armor and prays to the Gods for luck.

Lex apparently likes Nicola enough to send her an invite to a charity ball, where she crosses paths with Bruce for the first time. They talk for a while only to be interrupted by Clark.

After a meeting with Luthor to discuss a merger with their companies, and seeing hints of Luthor's true selfishness, Bruce grows suspicious of him and started to dig around. We see through memorabilia that his initial coldness towards Clark and other people wasn't out of spite but of grief: Jason Todd's death some years ago.

Clark continues his good deeds and is slowly regaining his respect. He even makes plan to visit a children's hospital but is forced to cancel when Superman gets called to show up for a Congress hearing. At the meeting Superman admits his guilt but tells about James and how he died a hero. The Senator doesn't know where Superman is going with this but is listening. Then Superman's voice trails of as he hears a beeping noise and shocked he leaves the room in a hurry. He briefly searches the place and finds a bomb strapped in a closet. He carries the bomb out and throws it as high into the sky as possible Back inside the audience and senator are bewildered by his absence then hear a loud booming noise outside. There's shock as a bright light flashes in the sky...

Superman legit rejected their hearing to save them from a bomb. A bomb planted there by Tess on the instructions of Luthor...a plan she was willing to sacrifice her own life for.

This leaves the senator reconsidering her stance: if he really was as bad as people say then he wouldn't have saved them.

After the incident the entire country begins to have a more positive opinion of Superman while the government launches a search for possible terrorists. Bruce hears about what happened and after sneaking around as Batman, finds out about Luthor being the one responsible for the attempted terror attack. Later on he (as civilian) makes an announcement that he is not going to go through with the merger with LexCorp.

Hearing the news that Superman foiled his attempted assassination (and losing out on Wayne Enterprises), Lex gets very pissed off and threatens to fire Tess. She tries to save face by reminding Lex of his contingency plan...making Lex calm down and grin as he begins to remake his plan.

Nicola agrees to a date with Bruce and prepares. Meanwhile Lois and Jimmy are enjoying a night on the town while Clark stays behind to work on a news story. The two friends were about ti make it back to their hotel before being accosted by some men who force them into a car and takes them to Lex Corp.

At the HQ Lois calls him out that his plan could spell doom for the world. Surprisingly Luthor agrees but makes it clear he doesn't care. He orders his men to capture her, but Jimmy manages to escape and goes off to find Clark (who is writing a story to expose Luthor's actions). Jimmy tells him learns from him that Lois is in trouble Superman tells him to stay as he fetches the police. In reality he jas gone to find her as his hero alias. He finds her but just as he's about to rescue her Lex threatens that he also has another certain someone (Martha Kent ) captured if he doesn't comply, seeing that Supes was often seen visiting her. Reluctantly Superman complies and Lois is freed from her bonds, yet Lex takes them as hostages to a room lined with Green Kryptonite. He leaves to his warehouse to check on progress of his prototype. Jimmy wonders where Clark has gone and goes to the police station himself.

On their date Bruce mentions to Nicola that he knows what she's up to. Nicola coldly replies what was he talking about and he mentions Lex's actions and her possible status as an accomplice This starts a spat leading to Nicola spilling that she is working against Lex (making her a foil to the blindly loyal Tess) and that her goal was to stop Lex from unleashing his plan. She already called a friend to help them yet when Bruce presses forward they see a kid (Jimmy) wandering around and concerned asks what's wrong. Jimmy replies that his friend was kidnapped and doesn't know what to do. Bruce leaves to find Clark while Nicola stays with Jimmy.

Nicole & Jimmy arrives back at the hotel and sees Tess Mercer waiting for them. She had been sent by Luthor to eliminate the witness. Nicola tries to talk her coworker out of harming an innocent kid but Tess refuses. They duel but Tess proves to be a surprisingly stronger fighter. Before Tess could come in for the kill a frightened Jimmy knocks her out cold from behind.

At HQ Lois & a weakened Superman attempt an escape. Lois believes its hopeless but Clark reminds her that Lex won't put them down for long. Batman arrives at the HQ and stealthily avoids the guards. He deduces the room Lois and Supes are locked up in and free them. Batman says thay a little birdie told him everything Lois and Clark grinning that it's Jimmy and the two superheroes decide to work together to bring down Lex.

Batman goes to save Martha (the warehouse fight) while Superman goes to confront Lex, dropping Lois off at the hotel where rhe police are waiting (Tess apprehended). Nicola researcher offers to take the reporter home but she declines, not wanting to sit back and watch Lex try to destroy the world. After giving her report to the police she and Nicole meet Steven Trevor (a descendant of Steve Trevor and an agent). Steven says he already sent his men to arrest Lex as they found that he waa behind the bombing. Lois sneaks away to see if she can help Clark.

Clark manages to catch uo to Lex at his lab and tries to reason with him. Lex says that he already unleashed his prototype as a test to see how many lives Superman is able to save. Superman argues that Lex has gone mad trying to play god, which he disagrees: "I'm not playing god I'm only playing favorites is all." Disgusted, Superman leaves and goes off to fight the prototype. As he does an entire line of trucks arrive...led by Nicola's special friend...

Lex realizes he has been found out and tries to destroy the evidence. Lois realize that the monster was made of Kryptonian DNA so she looks around for the spare Kryptonite and manages to grab a considerable long piece. Just as she does the place starts flooding and she runs. However she nearly drown. Fortunately she gets pulled out by a woman wearing armor. Lois doesn't even ask her name as she recognizes the W shaped emblem and blue&red color scheme. Lois gives the heroine the spear and tells her that she says she loves Clark. Wonder Woman nods and heads towards the direction of Superman.

Superman draws the monster out away from the city and is helped by Batman. Wonder Woman arrives with the spear. The final battles commences with Batman providing a distraction to lead the prototype away. Diana and Superman fight the beast but is soon overpowered. Clark takes the makeshift spear and goes off and manages to subdue the creature rather unwilling to kill it. However he gets blown up by a missile sent by the US military and everyone thinks he is dead.

To his he walks out of the smoke, banged up but alive, having narrowly escaped the blast. The monster has died, leaving Clark to wonders sadly if the monster could have been saved as it had no control over its actions. A relieved Lois embraces him as the other two supers look on in bittersweet triumph.

Several days later, the President, on the behest of the Helen Hunt Senator, gives Superman a full pardon. The world also starts to see rising of actual superheroes to take in the increase of villains having been inspired by the actions of the newly dubbed Trinity. The ending shows that long term exposure to Kryptonite left Lex without any hair, cementing his iconic look. He had also beem arrested and tried and ends up locked up at a mental institution on an insanity plea. His other henchmen & Tess are jailed and Luthor's company scrambles to do damage control. Bruce catches up to Clark and apologizes for being cold. They part ways on better terms before musing at the similarities between their alter egos. Diana teases that they make a great team and returns to the capital with her team. Bruce returns to Gotham and stops at the cemetery to place flowers on Jason Todd's grave, showing that he moved to the acceptance stage of grief. Jimmy also ends up getting a job as an intern for Daily Planet with Lois as his mentor this time. And Nicola goes to Gotham to work as a social worker and takes up a case: Cassandra Cain.

The final scene ends with Clark as Superman dressed up in Metropolis visiting a local orphanage/foster home, showing that at his core he truly does care about humanity despite all them haters. 👏👏 👏 happy ending everyone!!!

The movie ends with a montage of

- Cyborg walking around aimlessly in his hometown and finding a discarded newspaper highlighting the heroes' exploits and getting the idea to try becoming a hero himself

- Aquaman in his kingdom catching up with the surface world and becoming curious, and wonders about an alliance

- Barry standing in a hill in his city in costume. He grins and smiles, before pulling over his cowl and racing off

- And Lex, plotting an escape from his cell, suddenly sees a peculiarly tall guard looming over him. He makes a digging comment that the guard shrugs off. To his surprise the guard unlocks the cell and leads Lex out. Lex asks who the guard is; the guard slips off his disguises revealing a sapient Gorilla...Gorilla Grodd!

All This sets up a future plot point that wouldn't be explored until after Justice League where we're introduced to the cinematic LEGION OF DOOM!!! The prototype they fight is not doomsday but foreshadows the creation of Bizarro (who was one of the original members of the LoD).

With the actual Justice League movie we continue with the formation of the team through several subplots converging into one major story arc. The Helen Hunt Senator plays a huge role being their ally and influence on building the Hall of Justice. Plus more Brucola stuff because we need fun stuff in Batman, Tom King.

[mariisseething]

Analyzing Hero Costumes: Girls of Class 1-A

My obsession has spiraled out of control. Let me roast analyze these babes. I’m dumb. I’m tired. I’m gay. Let’s do this.

Warning: I’m a cynical, lazy-ass critic with no consistent taste. Don’t expect a fair analysis.

(This is just for fun, please don’t get mad at me for being an undereducated weeb! I went into writing this with only the knowledge I’ve obtained through watching the show and reading the manga. I don’t know everything about the costumes, and I don’t want to either)!

Ashido Mina (Pinky)

Babe, imma be frank here.

I love her, but—

that shit ugly.

Funcionality: Mina’s quirk (Acid) comes from her hands and feet. If I remember correctly, she has passages in her shoes that her...foot..acid.....can pass through, and her hands are fully exposed. So her costume is “practical”, and works with her quirk.

Design: As I said before, that shit ugly. The body suit has the worst pattern and color combination I’ve ever seen. (Like if Sully from Monster’s Inc. was turned into a cow and hated it). Her tiddies should be popping out any second now, which isn’t great. Her weird armpit vest with it’s stupid fluffy collar is quite reminiscent of Hawks’ jacket, which leads me to believe that their costumes were made by the same designer. (Many of the designers in the BNHA universe put calling-cards in their costumes). Her white mask is pointless, but at least it matches the fluff on her collar. Her boots, though they have a purpose, are ugly as sin. The pale yellow doesn’t match any other piece in the ensemble, and the Dabi-scar colored purple makes me sad. Hate that.

Total Score: 2/10

Her costume does almost nothing to enhance her quirk, and it’s hideous. The only reason it got two points was because of the shoe holes, and the possibility that it’s connected to my boy Hawks.

Seriously, this is some Seasame Street lookin-ass bullshit.

No hate on Mina, she’s lovely, but her taste is atrocious. (see: her bedroom).

Asui Tsuyu (Froppy)

Okay, okay bitch I see you.

I’m here for this.

Funcionality: Tsu’s quirk (Frog) requires a decent amount of flexibility from clothing. Spandex works for that I guess. Normally, I would automatically fail this costume for having goddamn toe “socks”, but for Tsuyu they’re nessecary. Having her individual toes chiseled out helps her grip onto shit when she’s kicking ass. It looks like her gloves are attached to her body suit, which is rad, but I’m not sure what the purpose of that waist belt-thing is. If anything, the chunky pieces of her costume would make it harder for her to swim. I also have no fucking clue what that head piece is. I once thought they were like binoculars or something, but she’s never put them on her face so...they wouldn’t fit....on her face..huh.....I’m so stupid bro.

Design: Lets start with a positive, the color scheme slaps. Everything goes together, and the dark green even matches her hair. The bodysuit has a cool structure, and I can definitely appreciate the slight turtleneck and boot-esq feature; however, the chunky wrist pieces, belt, neck/chest-thing, and head piece confuse me. I guess they’re there for fashion, gutter fashion. Shitty crap face fashion. Ugly butthole fashion. FILTH! I need to calm down holy shit—

Total Score: 6/10

The look honestly only lost points for the random ass statement pieces. Water terrains are Tsuyu’s specialty, and a clunky outfit would certainly slow her down underwater.

The toe shit, turtleneck, thigh-high “boots”, and color scheme are pretty dope though.

(Also, she only has three toes but frogs have four).

(My Hero Academia: Cancelled).

Hagakure Toru (Invisible Girl)

So, here’s the real question.

Is she naked?

Short answer: I dunno.

Funcionality: So she’s invisible, right? A good costume would emphasize that. I can only assume she wears the boots and gloves for comfort and so her allies can see where she is. If she wants to go full invisible, she just has to take them off. At one point, it was confirmed that she was topless during the sports festival, but we’ve had no further updates on her costume. A few people have theorized that her costume is made of her hair (assuming she has hair). We know that this is possible, as Mirio’s costume is made of his hair so he can remain clothed while his quirk is activated. The only issue would be making an outfit out of something you can’t see. If I were Toru, I would choose to fight nude because, I-uh...hmm, I-I can do what I want SHUT UP!

Design: There’s not much to critique here. The shade of blue on her gloves is cute, and the pink stripes don’t make much of an impact. The shoes are just about the most boring thing I’ve ever seen, like why are they beige??? What are they supposed to match? I just—ugh, beige??? What the fuck Horikoshi...smh.

Total Score: 5/10

Since we don’t know if the “hair-costume” thing is canon, I can’t rate it any higher. If that is true, it would be an 7/10. The outfit does its job, but I’m bored and beige sucks.

(Btw I don’t trust her...)

(Sketchy chick right here).

(Sketchy chick with some ugly-ass beige shoes).

Jirou Kyouka (Earphone Jack)

Aww.

She’s cute!

Look at her little face, d’awwwweeeeee!

Funcionality: The lovely Kyouka’s quirk (Earphone Jack), makes absolutely no sense to me. Like, I get that she can hear better and can eavesdrop really well, but how does she...make loud noises??? With the speakers??? Plugging earbuds into a speaker doesn’t make............noise, and the speakers aren’t part of her body. Whatever, back to the analysis. The speakers on her hands and calves amplify sound somehow, and her earlobes are exposed. It’s works.

Design: The speaker boots are basic, but acceptable. She’s got some comfy looking black pants, and a trendy salmon-colored top. Her jacket is iconic, and she’s wearing a choker. (+1,000,000 points for that). The white gloves don’t match shit, but they’re fingerless so I’ll let it slide. Her headphones almost match....meh. I don’t care. (+10 for the face paint).

Total Score: 8/10

Listen, I’d give her a 10 but this costume just isn’t....gimmicky, enough for me? She’s a superhero for fucksake! Now’s the time to dress your goddamn best! The look is practical, and seems to be her taste, I just disagree with her choices. Sue me. I’d either wanna fight in the wackiest most dangerous getup you’ve ever seen, or completely naked. Either way, I’m getting arrested. Jirou needs to get on my fucking level.

Uraraka Ochaco (Uravity)

I don’t know boys,

it seems like she might be...

round.

Fuck sharp angles!

Funcionality: Ochaco’s quirk (Zero Gravity) only requires her hands to work. More specifically, her fingertips. Uh, yeah those are some nude fingertips. *Ahem* moving on. Actually wait, since she often uses her quirk on herself it would be helpful for her to eliminate as much extra weight as possible, so I’m hoping that all of the accessories are hollow. They better be, or I’m gonna start throwing hands with Kohei Horikoshi.

Design: When Ochaco first got her hero costume she was surprised by how tight it was, even saying that it wasn’t supposed to be that tight. Bitch, how could it have been loose? I don’t...fuck it. I like the colors, I like the boots a lot actually, but who cares about that, I wanna talk about her fucking chastity belt. Who she keepin out? (Jesus Christ she’s a child, tone it down Mari). Do you think it’s comfortable to walk around with a chunk of plastic on your crotch?! I don’t know, seriously, is it? Maybe she’s trying to hide something...a hip dip perhaps?! Jk hip dips are stupid, that’s how bones work, don’t be ashamed. Her wrist...spheres... have handles on them, no comment, and whereas I usually LOVE chokers—that one is stupid and I hate it. Curvy little shit.

Total Score: 8/10

I like it overall, but some things are just too strange to overlook. (i.e. the chastity belt, wrist cuff handles, and the ugly choker). This costume doesn’t really scream Uraraka to me either. It’s a bit unoriginal to me.

I just don’t love it.

(Why are her fists clenched? Is she trying to fight? I could snap her like the twig she is and steal her girlfriend).

(Assuming she has one).

Yaoyorozu Momo (Creati)

Oohooohohohoho

hooohohoho

hoooooo mAN do I have some WORDS for this one!

Funcionality: Momo’s quirk (Creation) does require quite a bit of skin to be exposed, but I’m not sure why that skin HAS to be her boobs. She’s got thighs, a stomach, a back, an upper chest, and arms. Why do her Russian nesting dolls have to come out of her tiddies??? Okay, actually, she doesn’t make that many things with her tits. So....why’re they out? This costume definitely lets her quirk run wild, maybe too much.

Design: The red is pretty, and I can tolerate the sandy yellow. Her shoes are unimportant, so let’s just gloss over those. Now, WHAT is that thing? A makeshift, tan colored, plastic tube mini...skirt? I know she has a shelf on her ass that she carries books on, but doesn’t she have a cellphone? Google? Can’t she just remember the molecular make-up of a cannon? (Because she only makes cannons now for some reason). Have we ever even seen her reading those books? Can she read? A large portion of her midsection/chest is exposed up to another one of those weird chest pieces and a neck jacket. Maybe she should cut the neck coat off and glue it to her tiddies.

Total Score: 1/10

Listen, Horikoshi clearly understands what Momo’s costume needs, but he has no idea how to make that. This outfit IS inappropriate, no matter how you look at it. She’s a minor, and I don’t like the idea that she’s running around 75% naked. The only part of this that I like is the shade of red. That’s not good.

I really like Momo, she’s a good character, it’s unfortunate that we have to sexualize her so much. Can’t girls just be smart without also being eye candy for creepy 30 year old weebs?

——————

That’s it for this analysis. I plan on posting more stuff like this since I enjoy writing it so much! You should totally follow me so you don’t miss my future ramblings! 💖

Unless you hated it.

I wouldn’t blame you.

[taexual]

GOT7 / Mafia AU - They lose their child

REQUEST: Can I request a GOT7 mafia au where they lose their child in a park or something and get worried. Something fluffy with a little angst. ☺

I made this a little less specific and also accidentally added more angst but I hope you like this, love!!

OTHER MAFIA AUS: BTS / EXO / GOT7 / MONSTA X

ALSO, DISCLAIMER: this is not related to my GOT7 Mafia AU Arranged Marriage series!

WARNING: strong language, mentions of violence, themes of exaggerated protectiveness

Mark

It was the first time Mark was the one taking your daughter to the closest playground. Usually, it was you, since he insisted he was too busy – but, really, you had a feeling he only refused to take her to the playgrounds because he was afraid it’d make him look less masculine – but this time, you were stuck at home, fighting allergies and your little girl would not leave you and Mark alone, insisting that one of you had to take her outside.

Mark was, of course, completely whipped for his daughter and he did not want to see her cry – seriously, the sight of tears welling up in her eyes was what made him drop everything and follow her orders – so, cancelling all of his plans for the day, he packed up the essentials – which included half of his impressive collection of Browning pistols because you never know which elementary-school boy might dare talk to his princess – and headed to his daughter’s favorite playground.

He ended up being impressed by how nice it was outside and how much his daughter warmed his heart by calling out, “daddy, look!” when she wanted him to watch her jump off the swing or climb the monkey bars.

The mood darkened a little when Mark received a phone call he had to take immediately. He felt like he only turned around for one second to answer the call, but when he looked back at the swing to check on his daughter, she suddenly wasn’t there.

“So, as I was saying, this guy just got on my last nerve. You need to get your damn—”

“Shh, shut up,” Mark exclaimed into the phone, interrupting his friend that had to update him on one of the jobs Mark had left him in charge of. “My child is missing.”

“Missing?!” his friend asked. “You lost your daughter? Why didn’t you say so? Is that why you took a free day?”

“No, we were at a playground and she—listen, just take care of everything. I’ll call you back,” he said quickly.

Putting the phone back into his pocket, Mark took one hard look around the playground before calling out his daughter’s name so loudly, the nearby children all flinched. He paid no attention to any of them, however. He needed to find his daughter and then he was going to make sure to never let her out of his sight again.

JB

It was a busy time for you and Jaebum both. You managed to get Jaebum to understand that, although you weren’t shooting people for a living, your job was still important, and yet, despite that, when you came across problems about who’d watch over your son, Jaebum always insisted you do it. This lead to lots of arguments and, eventually, not feeling like fighting about this again today, Jaebum gave you a call to let you know that he’d pick his son up from school that day.

He got there just as a few kids were running down the stairs after walking through the front door. They greeted their parents and began to tell them about the day they’ve had at school. Jaebum found himself smiling, as he anticipated hearing what his own son would tell him.

However, Jaebum’s son was nowhere to be seen no matter how much Jaebum looked. It just didn’t seem like the little boy left the building.

Panicking and yet still choosing to wait another few moments, Jaebum watched the other parents leave with their kids in the car and then got his gun out, absolutely certain that the only reason why his son did not come out of the school was because someone took him.

Not really looking for any other explanations for his son’s absence – because every second was important – he walked into the school with his gun drawn and was greeted immediately by shocked and scared gasps of the teachers.

“I’m looking for my son,” he said. “I’m Im Jaebum.”

The teachers exchanged glances, scanning through lists of children inside their heads. Finally, one of them elicited a sound of acknowledgment.

“Mr. Im,” she said a little awkwardly. “Your son was absent from classes the whole day today.”

Cold sweat ran through Jaebum’s body as he heard this.

“W-what?” he stuttered – probably for the first time in his life. “But my wife had to drop him off here. She did drop him off before leaving for work.”

The teachers looked at each other again, not quite sure what was going on or what to do next. Jaebum was still holding a gun in a building full of children – even if the majority of classes were over for the day –  so the situation was, at the very least, sensitive.

“Perhaps it’d be best if we talked about this in my classroom,” said the teacher who was talking to Jaebum before.

“No,” he said firmly, right as she was turning around in hopes of him following her. “If he wasn’t here, I have to go. I have to find where the fuck my son is, and the sooner that happens, the better it’ll be for everyone.”

Jackson

Jackson was proud to admit that his mother, his daughter, and you were his favorite girls. In fact, if anyone asked him, he was more than glad to talk about you three endlessly – which is why no one ever asked. That didn’t stop Jackson from bragging, though. Once, he had truly ended up distracting the enemy Mafia family by starting an in-depth discussion about which kindergarten his daughter should go to. After getting the opinions of the enemy men, he shot them, of course. But now he had a list of new kindergartens.

His three-year-old daughter was delighted to go to one and meet other kids her age – Jackson might have loved her with his whole being, but he was easily the most protective dad on the block. Which is why he was always the one dropping his daughter off at the kindergarten in the morning, and picking her up in the evening.

You told him you could do it and actually insisted you do because sometimes, Jackson arrived to pick his daughter up with blood still visible on his shirt, and you didn’t want your daughter to see him like that. Jackson disagreed, though. His little girl just sighed whenever she saw his white shirt stained with blood and said to him, “mommy will be sad.”

One time, however, as Jackson arrived to pick his bright, too-smart-for-her-own-age daughter up, he ended up waiting for her to arrive longer than usually. Twenty minutes later, he was overwhelmed with concern and ended up exiting his car to talk to the staff.

But there was no staff. The kindergarten had just closed two minutes ago.

Kicking the door down was not a difficult task to Jackson; he’d already lost count how many doors he kicked down in his life. Looking around the premises in complete darkness with his favorite Glock out was not overly difficult, either.

The difficult part was the realization that his daughter wasn’t here. And he had no idea where else she could have been.

“Y/n,” he said to you, once you picked up his call. “I’m going to be home late. There’s some stuff to do.”

“Did you pick our daughter up?” you asked right away. “Is she okay?”

“She’s… safe and sound,” Jackson replied, closing his eyes momentarily. “I’ll make sure she is.”

Jinyoung

Before he had his own children, Jinyoung always despised the men who bragged about their children’s achievements. He just groaned and rolled his eyes whenever one of his men kissed a picture of their child before pulling their pistol out to start the attack. He could never understand it.

But then he met you and had a daughter, and all of his priorities switched. He was absolutely whipped for his little girl and you ended up having to remind him on more than one occasion that if he didn’t learn how to tell her no, she’d grow up spoiled.

“Good,” was Jinyoung’s response, however. “That means I did my job as her father well.”

You couldn’t quite understand his logic but, before you could stop Jinyoung, your five-year-old daughter was suddenly gifted the puppy she had so desperately asked her father for a few days ago.

“You’re walking it,” you warned Jinyoung. “And I won’t care if you have important business to take care of. I love the dog but—”

“I’ll do it, you have nothing to worry about, babe,” he replied, never allowing himself to lose the confidence. “Sweetheart!”

His daughter – reacting to the only name Jinyoung ever called her – was by his side immediately, the small puppy peacefully snoring in her arms. Eager to see how excited his little girl would be to play with the puppy outside, Jinyoung took both of them took a park, giving you a few moments of peace and quiet.

And yes. Literal moments. Because exactly eight minutes after they had left the house, Jinyoung was calling you. As soon as you answered, you could hear squeaky yelping in the background of the call and it took you a second to realize that it must have been the puppy.

“Jinyoung?” you asked, sensing that something was wrong. He wouldn’t have called so soon otherwise. “What happened?”

“Uh, see… there’s a bit of a situation here,” Jinyoung said, his voice nervous. “It’s my fault entirely, but you can yell at me later.”

“What happened?” you asked again, stricter this time now that your heart started to beat wildly in your chest.

“So, a gun went off somewhere in the distance. Presumably aimed at me,” Jinyoung started to explain and you heard shuffling in the background. He must have been walking. “The dog got scared and it ran. Our daughter, the sweet thing, ran after him, of course. Well, while I got my gun out and eliminated the threat – oh, by the way, there’s a dead body in the park; you think that’ll be problematic? Anyway. So, right after I did that, I saw that the dog is back. B-but, um… our daughter… well, she isn’t.”

“What do you mean she isn’t?” you asked, standing up. “You lost our daughter?”

“I’ll find her! She couldn’t have run very far!” Jinyoug said. “I just need you to get here and take the puppy. Oh, and, I love you.”

“I will kill you, Jinyoung.”

“Everything will be okay! I promise,” he said as he heard you loudly slam the door of your house shut. “At least let me find our daughter before you blow my head off, okay?”

Youngjae

Youngjae did not give his son any air to breathe. He was constantly around him, constantly worrying that something would happen to him. He was your and Youngjae’s only child so you could understand Youngjae’s fear but you also thought that your boy would suffer a lot if he grew up smothered and didn’t learn how to do anything himself.

Youngjae’s inability to find a proper balance between completely distancing himself from his child and suffocating him with his attention eventually resulted in Youngjae losing his mind outside of the ice cream shop where he had allowed his son to go in, so he’d get himself a vanilla cone. It has now been a little over twenty minutes but his son still hadn’t come out.

“Hello, sir, is there anything I can do to help?” the waitress asked kindly as soon as Youngjae threw the door of the shop open and ran inside, his stomach sinking at the anxious realization that something went wrong.

“A small boy,” Youngjae said, struggling to explain properly because he kept looking around the small shop, unable to understand that aside from him and the waitress, simply no one else was here. “Dark hair. Big eyes. Not very tall. Came to buy ice cream. I’m the dad. Outside. Waiting.”

Youngjae seemed to forget how to form coherent sentences as he proceeded to freak out, while the waitress watched him, confused and slightly alarmed.

“Sir, is your son missing? Maybe you should call the—”

Missing.

As soon as the waitress said the word, it sunk in. His son wasn’t here. Youngjae didn’t know where he was. His son truly was missing.

“There’s no need,” Youngjae said, swallowing as he located his trustworthy gun in the back of his jeans, where it always was. “But I’m going to ask you to leave. I’ll do anything it takes to find my son. You won’t want to get in my way.”

BamBam

The thing BamBam was most excited about was teaching his son everything he knew. BamBam had a chance to create a legacy with his son, but sometimes he felt like he loved the boy a little too much to get him involved in the danger of this life.

You trusted BamBam 100%, so you didn’t tell him that you’d have preferred him not to ruin your son’s childhood by teaching him how to fire a rifle instead of teaching him how to ride a bike. You knew your husband would make the right decision about your son’s future.

Naturally, after noticing how happy you looked every time he and his son did something normal, BamBam decided that his Mafia training could wait. Your son had plenty of time to learn how to defend himself from potential attackers. He could be just a kid right now.

And BamBam would come to regret this decision exactly three days after making it, when he left his child in the children’s section of the bookstore for one minute and did not find him there when he returned. It was like his son wasn’t even in the store anymore, because BamBam looked everywhere and he didn’t find him. On top of that, no one he asked seemed to have seen his son, either.

“Sir,” one man said to him as gently as he could, given the sensitive nature of the situation. “Perhaps you should calm down and call the police.”

“With all due respect,” BamBam replied dryly, the fire in his eyes indicating that he had no plans to calm down anytime soon. “When it comes to my son, I’m the police. And if there’s anyone to blame for the fact that my son is fuck knows where right now – I will fucking find that person.”

Yugyeom

Yugyeom was really eager to spend as much time with his son as he was physically able to, and not just because his son was also his heir, but simply because Yugyeom now had a best friend for life. Sometimes, he tended to forget that his five-year-old was not his peer, however. But the little boy never told on his dad when he swore next to him by accident.

Their bond was really one-of-a-kind and Yugyeom couldn’t imagine losing his child even in his absolute worst nightmares.

And yet, that was exactly what happened, when he took his little boy to the park since it was a sunny day and you weren’t feeling well enough to take your son there yourself. Yugyeom had volunteered to do it – “I am his dad, after all” – but only after making sure you were really okay to be left alone.

Somehow, as he gave you a call to check up on your health, he had lost himself inside his thoughts – granted, that always happened when Yugyeom was talking to you, so he really should have seen something like this coming, but who ever does? – and didn’t notice his son disappear from his field of vision.

Frantic, Yugyeom began calling his son’s name out loud. He pushed every child off from the swings as if his son had suddenly morphed into someone else. Crying, the kids ran away, while their parents cursed at Yugyeom and threatened to call the police.

One brave mother even dared to grab his hand to get him to stop scaring the other kids, but Yugyeom pulled his hand out of her grip so feverishly, she stumbled backwards a little.

“Don’t fucking touch me,” Yugyeom snarled at her, not a touch of his usually cool posture in sight. “Unless you’ve seen where my son had gone, don’t you fucking dare interrupt me.”

The woman forgot whatever she wanted to say immediately. Turning around with a huff, she left Yugyeom alone as he continued his search for his son, quietly cussing everyone out – especially himself, for not looking after his child well enough – under his breath.

masterlist / ask (requests are closed)

[sugaskully]

DIE FOR YOU - chapter one

ALL PARTS - Die For You

BTS bodyguard au

Words: 3110

C H A P T E R - O N E

[ 14 NOVEMBER 2018 ]

CLEOBELLA

I woke up the next morning to a knocking on my bedroom door, the unfamiliar sound confusing me as I sat up, wincing in pain that centred around my forehead. I usually woke myself up due to the fact that my dad was always working and my classes started at 5pm, I had no real reason to wake up at this ungodly hour.

“Come in.” I called, rubbing my eyes as I moved to cross my legs, sat atop my oversized bed as my dad entered the room, crossing to the bay windows before opening both sets of curtains, letting the light in “What’s going on?”

“You’re meeting your security personnel today.” He simply said, heading back towards the double doors “Then I have a business meeting, you will find something to do for the time being and later we’ll have dinner. Your classes have been cancelled for tonight, after what happened yesterday.”

“Dad, honestly I’m fine.” I sighed, my head disagreeing with my statement instantly.

“Honestly, you don’t look it.” He admitted, “You have about twenty minutes to get dressed and look alive again, Bella-Bear.”

“Twenty minutes?” I scoffed, “So I’ll take forty then.”

“As you always do.” He smiled, closing the door behind him as I let out a breath of air.

Time to see if I did actually look as bad as a feel. I slowly slid out of my bed, trudging along to my ensuite bathroom, heading to the mirror above one of the sinks to see the horror before me.

My plaster had fallen off sometime during my sleep, revealing a very swollen and very purple bruise, the area around my eyes darkened slightly due to the impact of being hit with the butt of a gun.

“Oh my god.” I whispered, staring in complete shock horror at my appearance “Nothing can fix this.”

I got to work, showering, blow drying my hair, washing my face but being extra delicate with my forehead as I applied different face wash treatments and creams, finishing by applying some makeup, thanking the makeup gods for concealer that helped make the situation at least a little better.

Who was I even trying to impress? Some 40-year-old ex-military bodyguards that probably wouldn’t even spare me a second glance? No. Myself. And the various business people that will probably see me at the dinner my father had planned later that day.

Once I was satisfied with my attempt at covering the damage, I moved to my wardrobe, connected through my ensuite so I could easily move from there to change and back out to my bedroom. Honestly, it was excessive, but the archetype and home designer asked me to design my room, so naturally, I went a little overboard. Every little girl dreams of designing their own bedroom when they grow up, and well, I got to live that dream to the fullest.

It wasn’t long before I was changed into a beige turtleneck sweater, tan tartan skirt, black tights and knee-high boots, planning on walking my dog after briefly meeting the men that would observe me 24/7.

Before leaving, I glanced towards the safe in my room, heading over to unlock it with my code before taking out my handgun, tucking it into the waistband of my skirt, using the oversized fabric of my sweater to cover it before grabbing my jacket just incase.

I exited my bedroom, glancing up from my phone to see one of the home security guards nod in my direction, gesturing towards the staircase.

“Your bodyguards have already arrived ma’am.” He said as I headed towards the left staircase “They’re all waiting in the Parlor.”

“Is Jesse here?” I asked, noticing how the man frowned in response before nodding slightly.

“He should be arriving later, Ma’am.” He said.

“Thank you.” I smiled, heading down the steps before glancing around at the ridiculous amount of guards in every visible room, guarding any main door that led to the outside and any potential threats.

“You are to escort her wherever she goes,” I heard an increase of my fathers voice as I headed towards the Parlor “Remain by her side whenever I am out of the country, perform background checks on any individual that she has contact with, eliminate threats to her life and-”

“Treat me like a Royal Princess.” I interrupted sarcastically, entering the room as many pairs of eyes turned to look at me “Honestly, I can manage one foot in front of the other, father, I don’t need this many people risking this lives for me when I’m not in danger.”

“Bella-bear, my Princess.” My father said, moving around the chaise lounge to hug me “You said you’d play along.” He whispered as I sighed before nodding, turning to observe the men with a smile.

All seven of them, stood side-by-side, clad in dark suits with matching ear pieces, seven pairs of eyes on me.

Ex militia. And from the looks of it were not failing in the beauty department. Hot but deadly, and completely off limits to me, as this kind of business would be strictly professional. They would protect me and I would naturally hate them for not giving me space. That’s how this works.

“Bella-bear meet Kim Seokjin, Min Yoongi, Jung Hoseok, Kim Namjoon, Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung and Jeon Jeongguk.” My father said, each giving me a curt nod when their name is mentioned “The top security personnel in the country, hired solely to protect my daughter as recommended by me and my dear friend and boss President Yang. As everyone within this room knows, my job is extremely important and due to the ties between the American Government and Secret Intelligence Service, as well as the South Korean Government and my job as Chief of the Secret Intelligence Security Agency it poses a great risk to the lives of those important to me. And the only life important to me is my daughter’s, and because of my status, the entirety of the world is aware of this fact.”

“So I’m going to have a security personnel following me around for the rest of my life?” I asked, slightly worried that the response would be bad.

“For as long as your life is in danger, we will protect you, Miss Roman.” Kim Namjoon nodded.

“Right, that settles it then.” My father said, clapping his hands together in contentment before checking his watch “I have a meeting in twenty-five minutes so I better head out, boys, take good care of her while I’m gone, okay?”

“Yes, Sir.” Seokjin nodded.

“Of course, Mr Roman.” Jungkook said, my eyes following my father as he smiled, kissing my cheek before leaving with two guards of his own.

I let out a breath of air, slowly turning back around to see that the seven of them were still watching me, either out of curiosity or cautiousness as if at any given moment I might be attacked… or maybe they were staring at the hideous bruise on my forehead?

“I’m walking my dog.” I announced, turning to leave the Parlor when footsteps followed, not just one or two like I had suspected… no… all seven, and just to confirm I turned back to see that, yes, they were all right behind me “Honestly, can’t I just bring one of you along?” I sighed.

“No less than two.” Namjoon said, “Jungkook come with me. The others, find something useful to do.”

“You’re a little young.” I voiced aloud as we began walking, heading to the kitchen where Frodo was most likely eating his food “And you did Military Training?”

“I started young, Miss Roman.” Jungkook nodded, his voice kept professional and straight to the point “Finished top of my regiment, with only a few years training.”

“Impressive.” I said, pushing open the kitchen door only to have Frodo leap up immediately, tongue sticking out as his tail wagged, trying to familiarise himself with the new company “None of you are afraid of dogs are you?”

“Of a… Border Collie?” Namjoon asked as he became Frodo’s next victim, jumping onto his back paws as Namjoon scratched the top of his head and behind his ears.

“Okay, allergic then?” I sighed.

“Negative.” Jungkook said, Frodo moving to him.

“This is Agent Wolf, confirming location. Wildfire.” Namjoon spoke, pressing a finger to his earpiece as he turned away “Rosebud is secured, will be on the move but escorted by myself and Agent Bambi.”

“Wildfire and Rosebud?” I frowned as Namjoon turned back around to face me “Code names.”

“I’m Agent Wolf. Jungkook is Agent Bambi. Wildfire is your home.” He nodded firmly, “And you’re Rosebud. Incase anyone who is a threat to you gains access to those communication devices, the code words will help to conceal your whereabouts.”

“Nobody knows who I am.” I huffed, “Just some Government Official’s daughter… why would anyone want to kill me?”

Namjoon and Jungkook remained silent, watching as I whistled to Frodo, getting him to follow me before heading back through the house and to the front door.

“How far is this park?” Namjoon asked as he headed straight towards one of the black SUVs with tinted windows and no doubt bulletproof titanium armour infused into the body of the car.

“You walk to the park.” I said, glancing down at my dog “That’s the point of walking your dog.”

“Having you out in the open like that is dangerous.” Jungkook said, shaking his head “We cannot risk it, Miss Roman, I’m sorry.”

“I have a run in with my crazy ex-boyfriend and I’ve suddenly got seven keepers?” I scoffed, shaking my head before walking towards the security gate “No, I am going to continue doing normal things and walk my dog, no matter the risks.”

“Dammit, I knew you’d be difficult the moment I laid eyes on you.” Namjoon mumbled before rushing to catch up, Jungkook on the other side of me “Just listen to everything I tell you so we can keep you as safe as possible.”

“Wouldn’t want to spoil your pay check by having my head blown off, would you?” I whispered, Namjoon and

Jungkook keeping straight faces as they continued to look ahead of us, Jungkook’s head every so often moving to rest on the gun he had tucked into the inside of his suit jacket, Namjoon’s eyes scanning every inch of the dog park we had arrived in “Don’t you find this exhausting?”

”Find what exhausting, Miss Roman?” Namjoon asked as Jungkook watched Frodo rolling around with a smile on his face.

“Dedicating your life to protecting someone else whilst they live theirs?” I asked.

“I work with six friends that I consider my brothers, doing a job that I know I’m good at.” Namjoon said, “At the end of the day, my client is my responsibility, and in this case, that is you. Saving the lives of others is thrilling, if I be so bold to state. My sincere apologies, Miss Roman.”

“No, no, it’s completely fine.” I reassured him, “It was my fault, I’m just trying to make this situation a little less awkward, by getting to know you both a little better since we’ll be spending so much time together anyway.”

“Understandable.” Namjoon nodded, “We need to wrap this up and head home, this place is not secure.”

I frowned, looking around at the various people in the park. An elderly couple walking their dogs, kids running around with their dog, couples in conversation on a few benches.

“I don’t think anybody is a threat to me here.” I said, watching as Namjoon’s shoulders tensed up, clearly not appreciating my constant need to second guess him.

“Okay, I’ll let you make the decisions.” I nodded, whistling Frodo back over, Jungkook turning to look at me, nodding curtly “After all, my life is in your hands.”

The walk back was quick and efficient, just as Namjoon must have planned it, a few pedestrians giving me odd looks as two men in suits with ear pieces followed me, Jungkook beside me, Namjoon behind, Frodo clueless as he ran ahead.

“You’ll have to make us aware of your schedule.” Namjoon said, “So I can plan ahead the safest route and ensure that nobody there is a threat to you.”

“I have night classes at the medical school a little across town.” I said, waiting as Namjoon typed in the code to unlock the security gate of my house.

“From five to ten.” Namjoon nodded as the gate opened “I am aware. I meant your personal schedule, meeting with friends, hobbies.”

“I don’t really do much else other than go to school, study, walk Frodo and go horse riding.” I shrugged, “It’s hard to make friends given my dad’s job and how I’m always busy so I usually just hang out with Jesse.”

“Boyfriend?” Jungkook asked as I snorted out a laugh.

“My bodyguard, before you seven.” I corrected.

“Ah, I see, the one who failed at protecting you.” Namjoon said, showing his I.D to the guard at the front door although me being there was enough proof I’d assume.

“He was… well, yes, but it was partially my fault.” I huffed, watching as Frodo ran off in the opposite direction inside the house. Namjoon, Jungkook and I stopping underneath the chandelier as the guard shut the door behind us.

“With us you’ll never be hurt.” Namjoon nodded, “And it will never be partially your fault because we won’t fail you.”

“Good to know.” I smiled, “Well, I’m going to study a little while my dad is away and then I guess we’ll have that dinner.”

“A few minutes please, Miss Roman.” Namjoon said, “Your room is just being checked.”

“What?” I whispered a slight scoff “There are people in my room?”

“We just ensure that it is clear.” Namjoon said, “No hidden cameras, mics, etc. Your father informed us that the house is regularly checked but you refuse to have your room checked.”

“Because, firstly I hardly let anyone in there!” I gasped, completely bewildered that my father had allowed someone to invade my privacy like that “And secondly, invasion of privacy!”

“It’s all for your own safety.” Namjoon sighed, “It’ll do you good to remember that, save us arguments in the future.”

I glared at him, crossing my arms before stomping my foot in a childlike manner, on the verge of having a tantrum but I wasn’t going to give him that, especially because he looked on in amusement at my actions.

“You listen to what we say, when we say it.” Namjoon shrugged, “You’ll stay alive and safe that way, and it’ll make this easier for all of us.”

“And if I don't?” I asked, tilting my head to the side as I smiled slightly “If I make your life a living hell, what happens then?”

“I’ll repay the favour.” He said, completely unfazed by my words, making me even more frustrated due to the fact that he didn’t even care.

I span around on my heel, heading straight upstairs and turning down my hallway, stomping towards my bedroom doors which were adjacent, my eyes immediately moving to the bright-red-haired man, Taehyung, taking my journal out of my bedside table.

I stopped in the hallway, glancing over to see Jimin stood on my expensive vintage corner chair from Paris, checking each corner and crevasse of the room for cameras, I presumed.

Yoongi stood in the middle of the room, arms crossed as he observed his colleagues invading my personal belongings.

I stepped further into the room, unnoticed by any of them, turning to see that my en-suite bathroom door was open, Seokjin stood looking around before he began to search through the cupboards, pausing every so often to look in the mirror.

Hoseok was in my walk-in-wardrobe, every so often picking up an item of my clothing and frowning before he headed back into the main room through the other door, holding my most expensive item of lingerie, my face turning as red as the fabric.

“Uh, guys, do you think this is my colour?” Hoseok asked, Yoongi turning and clearing his throat when he noticed the item of clothing, Jimin reacting in a completely different way, losing balance and stumbling off the chair, saving himself from falling by grabbing my bed frame, eyes wide.

“Professional Security Personnel?” I scoffed, all eyes turning to me as Hoseok smirked, glancing from the fabric to me, no doubt trying to imagine me in it like a pervert, suddenly making me feel incredibly uncomfortable.

“Sorry, sweetheart.” Hoseok said, still holding the garment in plain sight “I was curious who I’d be protecting with my life, it seems you’re worth a bullet after all.”

I rolled my eyes, moving to snatch the fabric from him when he held it behind him and high above his head.

“This is a key piece of evidence.” Hoseok said, “Is there somebody we should know about? You know, so we can put them on the list of cleared friends… or others.”

“Nobody to know about.” I shrugged, “It’s my most expensive piece, so I haven’t worn it.”

“Yet.” Jimin added as I turned to look at him, looking on curiously as his eyes darkened and he smirked.

“Yet.” I repeated, watching the surprise fill his face as Hoseok cleared his throat.

“Everybody out.” Namjoon spoke sternly, all eyes turning to see him in the doorway “If the place is clear, leave Miss Roman to her studies.”

Taehyung moved to hand me the journal, Hoseok and Jimin leaving the room together, Yoongi grabbing the piece of fabric from Hoseok as he passed him, Hoseok frowning in confusion as if he had forgotten, Jin following suite with Taehyung. Leaving Yoongi behind, who remained watching me, an unreadable expression on his face, my lingerie in his hand.

“Thank you.” I said as he handed me the lingerie, letting out a small smile, waiting for him to return one but he kept a cold expression, said nothing and left.

I let out a breath of air in annoyance as Namjoon moved to shut the door behind him “I’ll be just outside.”

“On guard.” I mumbled, “You don’t have to, nobody inside my home is out to get me.”

“My job is to protect you, and I don’t have much else to do whilst in your home.” He shrugged, “Stop resisting my need to do my job.”

I held his stare before turning away to gather my folders and other studies, hearing the door click shut and returning my gaze to see that I was now alone.

[idolizerp]

LOADING INFORMATION ON AURORA’S MAIN RAP, LEAD VOCAL SHIN MIRYEO...

IDOL DETAILS

STAGENAME: Mia CURRENT AGE: 21 DEBUT AGE: 17 TRAINEE SINCE AGE: 14 COMPANY: Midas SECONDARY SKILL: n/a

IDOL PROFILE

NICKNAME(S): 

amelia - her english name, chosen when she was confirmed, sometimes used by fans and groupmates when she struggles to speak english.

yeoshin miryeo - “goddess miryeo”, used by netizens on the internet, in captions on variety shows, and any other time she looks particularly good

INSPIRATION: wanted to be famous since she was a kid and was planning to do so through modelling, but once she was scouted by midas becoming an idol became the logical path SPECIAL TALENTS:

cover dances - knows a lot of other groups’ dances and can whip them out when asked

photography - knows her own angles, knows others’

tongue twisters

NOTABLE FACTS:

was scouted by midas at an olympus fansign in 2012

was a child model until she started training

is interested in fashion and styling

chose her stage name from anne hathaway’s character in the princess diaries

IDOL GOALS

SHORT-TERM GOALS:

miryeo wants to build up her cult of personality. the best way she can imagine to do this is through variety shows where she can establish herself as separate from the aggregate aurora image, especially given the group’s overall reputation for being boring on variety. she’s begun this by getting herself onto sibling’s day out and is working with the company to get her face on as many networks and as many tvs as possible.

LONG-TERM GOALS:

ultimately miryeo wants to be famous as herself - not an idol, not a rapper, not a girl group member, but just getting attention for being shin miryeo. a kind of fame that sustains itself even after aurora disbands and miryeo stops putting out music. if she can establish herself as a variety figure, she’d like something like hyori’s homestay or even keeping up with the kardashians, where she would be filmed just living her life and accrue fame with little effort.

IDOL IMAGE

aurora’s mia has the kind of beauty that seems like it should be distant and cold, an ice princess, something so perfect it seems it should exist outside our own realm. to counter this, and to fit better with aurora’s overall image, midas has instructed her to behave warmly, down to earth, almost ignorant of her own looks, more “girl next door” than “most popular girl in school”. her origin story of being scouted at an olympus fansign contributes to this: sure, she may be stunning, but she was also a fan just like you! when she receives a compliment, she is to cover her cheeks as if to hide a (nonexistent) blush; when someone names her as their ideal type, she is to behave as if such an idea comes as a complete shock. she posts photos of herself in a carefully curated outfit made to look casual but show off her figure at the same time. she is good at fanservice, since she can project a sincerity towards the fans that give them the impression of a close connection. this behaviour inevitably gets her a reputation of being humble and also one of being fake; the former outnumbers the latter so midas has encouraged her to keep up the image. it couldn’t be farther from the truth.

onstage, mia is magnetic and striking. she has a natural ability to capture attention and a greediness that refuses to let it go. the difference between her company-issued image off stage and her onstage presence mean that she’s often branded as someone with “reversal charms”. aurora doesn’t do sexy concepts, nor will they ever, but mia often claims that she believes she suits a sexy concept better on variety shows, inevitably resulting in a sexy dance that further highlight these reversal charms. she embodies the concept required in the moment.

the biggest criticism she faces is her skill. at debut she was already at a lower skill level than the other members - as the only rapper in a group that has very little emphasis on rap at all, she got the main position, but in other aspects she is by comparison lacking. that wouldn’t be so bad on its own if she was making steady improvement. mia has in recent years become lazy, relying on her face to maintain popularity rather than trying to become a better musician. luckily, aurora has enough overprotective fans that criticism tends to get buried pretty quickly, although midas seems increasingly worried that unless she picks up the pace it’ll only be a matter of time until the negative comments overcome what even the borealis can handle.

IDOL HISTORY

i. shin miryeo seemed like the type whose life would be fall into place for her. her mother had been diagnosed with pelvic inflammatory disease at the age of 23 and was told that she may never conceive; ten years later, miryeo was born. she was pretty from birth, doted on as an only child, showered with love and praise, regarded as a miracle.

when she was four years old, miryeo and her mother took a day trip to seoul to visit family. on the subway, a woman in a pantsuit approached miryeo’s mother and introduced herself as a children’s modelling agent. “your daughter would be a perfect fit for an upcoming advertising campaign,” she said, “why don’t you think about it?” back home in gimpo her parents went back and forth deciding whether this would be a good decision. but it was true that their daughter was beautiful; why not try it once? if she hated it they’d leave it at that and forget all about it.

as it turned out, miryeo loved modelling. she thrived as the centre of attention, loved getting complimented and praised when she did everything right. after the first campaign was a success she was signed on as a child model to the agency and booked another, then another, then another. she modelled children’s jeans, she appeared as a child in a nuclear family for a bank ad, her bright smile was plastered on the walls in dentist offices for an informational poster about the importance of flossing. none of these jobs were particularly high profile or made her name known in any capacity, but back home, her popularity grew. she became known as the local model, with no shortage of school friends and neighbourhood ajummas to stroke her ego.

ii. miryeo decided she wanted to be famous. maybe this was inevitable, all things considered. the natural path to pursue this goal seemed to be modelling, and no one discouraged her from this path. she was expected to continue her schooling and keep her grades up, sure, but she already had the beginnings of a career coming together. with some more growing, some more time, and some bigger bookings, maybe she could make it.

miryeo liked pretty things, though, and at the age of thirteen she became enamoured with what she thought was one of the most beautiful things she’d ever seen: midas media’s rookie boy group, olympus. from the flashy outfits they wore to their perfectly sculpted features, they were absolutely perfect in the mesmerizing, untouchable way she dreamed of. the music and the dancing was secondary to their stage presence and their beauty.

she was scouted for the second time in her life in 2012. olympus had just released “the chaser” and, dedicated fan that she was, miryeo went to a fansign. she was pulled aside after its conclusion and was handed another business card. she decided that this was surely the better path to go down. being an idol gave you a much better chance at mainstream fame than being a model, didn’t it? she cancelled her contract with her modelling agency and signed with midas before the end of the month.

iii. miryeo had been raised to believe she was the best. not to prove herself to be the best, not to work to be the best, but to believe that she simply was. training at midas was the steepest learning curve possible.

she was there because she was pretty. other than being able to look good on camera, miryeo had no marketable skill. she could dance and carry a tune without embarrassing herself, but other trainees had natural talent and years of hard work already put into their craft. miryeo spent her first year of training stumbling, stuttering, struggling, getting yelled at in front of other trainees. she had always been the subject of love and admiration and praise; she had never really experienced embarrassment. a fear of humiliation turned into a work ethic. miryeo began pushing herself to be able to demonstrate improvement in her vocals and her dance. midas did with her what they normally did to pretty faces with no experience: tried to see if they could pick up rap. it began, predictably, as a disaster, but as she became more driven she even grew to like it.

being placed in the predebut group that became aurora meant miryeo was merely steps away from the fame and attention she craved, but the training process was particularly brutal then. midas had big plans for this group - dreamlike image combined with powerful choreography - and anyone who did not serve these plans was cut. miryeo fought to keep herself relevant in the race, not only in terms of the visual element she brought but also in terms of her skill. members kept being eliminated until five of them remained. miryeo considered it a miracle she made it to debut.

iv. aurora was a hit. she was a hit. her name, less so: the company decided “miryeo” was too difficult for international fans to pronounce, so she chose “mia” as a stage name after anne hathaway’s character in the princess diaries. midas made sure that the korean public loved her from the start, regularly getting her gigs that would show off her visuals and playing up her reputation as a unique beauty.

but that was all that was ever talked about. the hard work she put into rapping, singing, and dancing went unnoticed. after training and powering through their rookie years only to be viewed as a pretty face, miryeo decided to take the easy route. what was the point of working hard at music when no one took notice? she had never even wanted to do music; she’d wanted to be famous. rapping wasn’t what did it, her face was.

v. miryeo is growing increasingly lazy and arrogant. she is no longer being pushed to improve her skill; the work ethic that was so critical in her training period has fallen by the wayside. she is still beloved by the media. midas is starting to get concerned that comments will arise if fans notice that aurora’s signature powerful choreography is growing more lopsided, but miryeo isn’t concerned. she’s where she has always wanted to be, and she’s looking forward to more.

[real-good-now]

Letters to Juliet: Chapter 3

Chapter 1     Chapter 2

Summary: Betty Cooper dreamed of falling in love. She once thought it would be with the red-headed boy next door until he met the mysterious brunette in the pearl necklace.So, when she begins to receive anonymous love letters, she turns to the only person she knows who is not grossly in lust: her childhood best friend, Jughead Jones.

Chapter begins below the cut

     “So, first things, first. What is the evidence we have collected so far?” Jug asks, getting down to business as soon as I enter the office.

     I set down my bag on my desk and pull out the letter and the gardenia I placed in my textbook to press. “So far It is just these two letters and this beautiful flower.”

“The second one is new. What do you think of it?”

      I begin to respond but then decide to brush off the question. “Doesn’t matter what I think. I can’t even think about my feelings until I find out who this person is.” I pick up my trusty highlighter and purple pen that I use to edit Jug’s articles and start rereading the second letter once again. When I reach the last paragraph, I say, “This guy obviously has to have known me for a long time. That eliminates anyone new to the school…”

     “Great, we can eliminate Veronica. Now we have it narrowed down to the entire male student body!”

     “Look, Jughead,” I snap, “I asked for your help, not your sarcasm! Now, focus. I return my eyes to the letter but I can feel his gaze linger on me. “I didn’t mean to bite your head off. I’m sorry. I just really need to find out who this is, Juggie. Please?”

      “Why does this mean so much to you, Betts? He obviously doesn’t want you to know its him. Can’t you leave it alone?”

     “I don’t know why. I just have to. No one has ever really felt this way about me before. I want… I need to know if it is genuine, that he actually cares and this isn’t just… Veronica trying to cheer me up or a dumb cheer initiation prank masterminded by Cheryl. That’s why you are here. You’re my best friend but you are also one of the most honest people I know. I need you to tell me this isn’t some elaborate scheme, that this seems legitimate.”

     He pulls up a chair next to me and envelopes my hands in his. When he brings them up to his lips and places a gentle kiss on them, I am momentarily stunned to silence and a rush of warmth rushes through my body. He tilts my chin up so our eyes can meet and whispers, “You are amazing, Betty Cooper. You’re like Nancy Drew meets Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. You deserve love. You are too fantastic to be with anyone who treats you less than a princess.”

     I am speechless. What can you say to that? Those are the most beautiful, romantic words that any person has ever said to me. I don’t do it consciously, but gravity seems to pull our faces closer— so close I can feel his breath skate over my face. I see him glance down at my lips. Just a little closer and—

Knock. Knock.

     I spring out of my chair just in time to see the smiling face of Trev Brown round the corner. “Hey, Betty! I was wondering if I could talk to you for a minute?” He then seems to spot Jughead and, as a second thought, adds, “Oh, hi, Jughead.”

    I take a look down at Jug only to see him staring down at his shoes. He only spares a second to half-heartedly wave at Trev before he storms out of the room.

“Is he okay? Did I interrupt something?”

     I look after Jughead for a moment, still reeling from our… whatever it was, before I respond. “What? Oh, no. No. I think he’ll be fine. Anyway, what did you need?”

     “Well, I was hoping I could ask you on a date, actually. Just you and me, maybe a movie, a round of milkshakes at Pop’s…”

    For the second time in an hour, I feel the wind knocked out of me in shock. He’s asking me out? Me? We have known each other since pre-school and not once have I ever had an suspicion that he liked me as friends, much less romantically. We’ve talked in passing during student council functions, but never more than a few words here or there. I would’ve never guessed…

    However, it seems that my mouth can process the information faster than my head can, because I hear myself say, “Sure.”

“Cool! Yeah!” He answers, his timid smile growing to a full-blown grin.

     I hear him ramble on about times he is free and “I’ll text you later”, yet all I can think about Is what Jughead will think.

     I am at cheer practice hours later when Cheryl announces that we will be here much longer than she originally thought.

     “You bitches are a lot less capable than I gave you credit for. My mistake. Take a five minute break while I call Toni to tell her I have cancel our date because some people don’t understand their front handsprings from their hurkies!”

     I collapse onto the ground, my muscles exhausted from basing far too many stunts than I ever want to. “V, can you pass me my phone in the front packet of my bag? I have to tell my mom I won’t be home in time to make the cupcakes for her book club tonight.”

“Sure, B. Oh you have a—“

     I look up at her pause and see her staring intently at my phone, a look of shock or horror on her face. Which one, I’m not so sure.

      “Elizabeth I-don’t-know-your-middle-name Cooper, what is this text from a Mr. Trev Brown?” She begins to read the message in a voice that is supposed to be male, but sounds more Terminator than Trev. “Hey, Betty! Just wanted to know if next Friday at six is okay for our date? Blushy smiley face! Betty! Why is this gentleman inquiring of your plans on Friday night and sending you flushing emoticons? What are you not telling me!”

      She plops down on the floor next to me. I make to grab my phone but she moves it out of my reach before I can grab it and raises her eye brows at me.

      “Its nothing, I promise. I was in the Blue and Gold office this morning when he came in and asked me out.”

      “Oh my God! B! I didn’t even know you liked him. Good for you! I told you things would look up soon.” She pulls me up by my shoulders and gives me a big hug.

     Cheryl’s commanding voice booms across the gym. “ENOUGH AFFECTION! The only times you ladies are allowed to look happy is when you are smiling through the intense pain and adrenaline coursing through your veins in the midst of the mind-blowing routine. Which is anything but mind-blowing right now! Back to work!”

      Veronica helps me stand up and says, “We are not done talking about this, Ms. Cooper! I am calling Kevin and talking this out before we meet the guys at Pop’s tonight!”

     In my bedroom, I sit at my vanity while Veronica does my makeup and Kevin looks through my closet to find an outfit for my date.

     “Kev, I love and appreciate you for doing this, but my date is still a week away! That is plenty of time!”

      “Oh, my dear, sweet Betty. This is not just any date. This is your first date. Why are you acting so blasé about this?” He kneels in front of me and V halts her war on my eyebrows.

     I take a deep breath before thinking about it. Because he is right. I should probably be more excited about this. But something is keeping me from celebrating this thing that, just a few days ago, I was longing for.

But I don’t answer.

      “Betty, if you aren’t really into him, maybe it’s not the best idea for you to go out on your first date with him? There is still time to back out, no shame,” Veronica hedges.

      “I don’t want to cancel it. I had to have said yes for a reason. Whats the harm in one date, right?”

Then it hits me.

The letters. The flower.

I want him.

     I want the guy who has been sweeping me off my feet. I want the one who writes me the sweet nothings and makes even my extra-curricular hell sound romantic. What if that guy is Trev? What if he has been writing the letters and has changed his mind about his anonymity? And this date is his way of telling me?

This date suddenly just got more interesting.

     I must remain silent for too long because Kevin and Veronica have changed the subject to their own love lives.

“So I bought Archie’s anniversary gift yesterday and, I have to say, it is perfect!”

My curiosity piqued, I ask, “What did you decide to get him?”

     She reaches into her purse and pulls out what looks like a ring box. When she opens the box, I see two small guitar pick-shaped silver pieces, each engraved with an “A”. “I was talking to his dad a couple weeks ago and he was saying that they have a wedding to go to soon, some friend of the family, and I asked if Archie had a pair of cufflinks. He said no, so I called a friend of Daddy’s to have these custom-made! Aren’t they the cutest?”

     “Veronica, he will adore them! They are perfect!” Exclaims Kevin, stealing the box so he can examine them a little more closely.

Wait, his dad? “I thought you asked for Jughead’s help with the gift?”

      “Jughead,” she scoffs “why would I need Jughead’s help? That boy is as inept with gift-giving as he is with his own damn emotions!” Kevin nods along in agreement.

      “But he said that he was talking to you the other day because he needed your help with Archie’s gift?”

     She seems to think for a moment before it dawns on her and she hurries to come up with an answer. “Oh, yeah, that. Right! I needed him to hide the gift somewhere Archie wouldn’t find it, but then I realized I could just put it in my purse.” She turns and nervously digs through her bag.

      Its clear that this is not even close to the truth, but I know better than to try and get a secret out of Veronica Lodge. Its like her mind has a high-security vault that has a code only a select few know.

Instead, we leave for Pop’s.

      When we walk into the diner, I look around and see Archie and Jughead in our signature booth. It is clear they are in mid-conversation, Archie laughing and Jughead…is he blushing? God only knows what that is about. I start to head over, but Pop calls me over to his position behind the register.

    “I’ll meet you guys at the table, just give me a minute. Make sure Juggie doesn’t drink my shake before I get there!”

     Before I can ask, Pop hands me a letter. It is just like the others. A plain white envelope with To my Beloved on the front.

     He seems to read my mind because I can’t even get the question out before he says, “I don’t know who its from. The fella was long gone before I got back from the kitchen. It was just this and a post-it note that told me to give it to you.”

     I rip it open, starving for the next installment in this saga.

_______________________

To my Juliet,

    You are so much more powerful than any celestial body.

  I like to think I have at least a basic understanding of astronomy. I know how a star is born, and how it dies. I know that the sun will some day consume the Earth in a fiery inferno like no life has ever seen. I know that we all orbit that very sun.


But I have a new theory, something much more profound and ground breaking than Galileo or Newton.

I orbit you.

You have a gravitational pull that is so effortless, yet so strong, that I am powerless to resist it.

I am helpless, and I am not so sure that I want to be helped.

With each passing moment, I feel my body falling out of my own control and taking the path that you have determined for it, whether you are aware of it or not.

I cannot stop loving you, Betty Cooper, and I am not sure that I want to.

Always and forever yours, Your Romeo.

So chapter three is up! I was on vacation the past few days and I literally started writing this chapter on one of those free note pads that the hotels give you. >_<. I hope you guys like it. What could possibly be next for these two? You know what they say, one step forward, two steps back...

Thank you for all of your positivity!I hope this one lives up to the last two. Please, let me know if you like it and what you may want to see next!

[liebeztod]

tired of being a secret

It’s been a while since I’ve craved to write. I think so many terrible things — and I mean terrible as a relative term — have happened to me that finally, it’s time to put it all down in words, rather than the confusing mess they are in my head.

I guess I stopped writing because of how terrible things got at work. And I mean, TERRIBLE. A part of me was too exhausted to write whenever I had to go about my days at BMW. I was also afraid to record anything because of the possibility of legal action I wanted to take. At this moment, I feel like those things could’ve helped me. But because of work, the depression came back. The anxiety too, and both in full force. Suddenly there was this urge to kill myself again, this desire to just… let go of the wheel and ride on into oncoming traffic. I knew I had regressed, and I was mad that work led me to this.

In May of 2019, I filed an HR report with the HR Lawyer. All because I didn’t trust Megan, our local HR Manager. And given the way things turned out, I was right not to trust her. The entire investigation lasted from May (when I filed) until October. It was so much up and down. But worst of all, everyone in my department started to ignore me. My boss, David — Mitch, Nina, and obviously Jang. It was even more stressful because of all the duties they took away from me as Center Assistance Manager. Nina’s job was eliminated, and she was given the job of SRM — but still they withheld work from me. Work that I was supposed to absorb from her. For 4 months I was without tasks — David having taken all the legal matters away from me, but never supplementing it with anything else. It was getting humiliating to beg for work — beg for Nina’s work which I had already done in the past. It wouldn’t have been a new job for me. The bigger frustration was how she had two jobs to do, and was obviously prioritizing her new one, while I was sitting at work, literally twiddling my thumbs, online shopping, looking for projects. Making up projects! The anger in me was… insurmountable. I had to start going to therapy every week. I started taking anti depressants in September, because of how fucking terrible it was to go into an office where everyone ignored me.

The worst part about it, when it ended in October, was finding out Megan told everyone to ignore me. But without letting me know that was the plan. That’s what makes me so angry, and why to this day, I still think about taking legal action. I’m not even going to say it “SEEMS” unethical for her to have done that, because at the end of the day, it isn’t seems, it WAS unethical. I’ll never forget what she did to me. Creating a hostile environment where I felt the need to seek medical help, am on anti depressants, am visiting my therapist once a week, and where my doctor finally said, “I’m taking you out of work for 8 weeks.”

I came back in February. But I guess a lot of the important things happened while I was at work.

Aside from family and friends keeping my head above the water, I dabbled in something that was probably one of my greater shames. Going into it, I knew it was wrong. And coming out of it, I told myself, “That was wrong, and you never should have done it.” But I did do it, and all because I wanted some sort of reprieve from what was happening in my life.

Of course, my initial hurts were due to work. I was always stressed, always coming home crying, exhausted, beaten. I hadn’t even done ANYTHING at work. I just sat there, but they were the most draining days of my life.

The second hurt was still Peter. After seeing Peter in Japan last April, I had resigned that he was the only one for me. AGAIN. And I can tell you at this moment, as I write this, I still feel that way. But around July of last year, I was getting antsy. When he and I spoke to each other in that hotel room, me inadvertently confessing my love for him while he acknowledged he too had feelings for me, I clung to that. I still cling to that. When he told me, “One day you and I will be together. It’s going to be us someday, in the end” I clung to that, too. Like a mantra. Every day telling myself — we are going to be together. And even knowing that, I didn’t want to allow myself any kind of distraction.

Until I did.

Peter told me his girlfriend was to move back to Hawaii in August. I felt like I had time, y’know? The internal cravings were finally scratching, asking for just one hook up, one night with some random guy I’d regret.

But I did something worse. I went on a date.

His name is Scott. We met on Twitter through the Dodger twitter community. One date, and he didn’t kiss me. Second date, at the top of Perch Rooftop. We made out all night. Third date? Dodger game. Fourth date? Another dodger game. Fifth date? A weekend getaway in Palm Springs. Sixth date? I dunno, another Dodger game. Mastros, museums, botanical gardens, you name it. I did more with Scott in 5 months than I have with anyone else. In a way, I guess he was my first boyfriend. But… I also want to put an asterisk on that, because of the number one caveat in this whole story: Scott is married.

I think Scott is STILL married as we speak. But I don’t know. I knew he was married going into my first date because, like a smart person, I googled him. I googled “Scott _____” and found his wedding website, wedding registry, you name it. I saw pictures of him and his wife, who just got married March of that year. So why, in July 2019, is he asking me out on a date? Well, they were separated. Not “legally” separated but taking time off. That should have been a red flag to me, and maybe it was… but I think I went into it because of this promise of casualness. This idea that I wouldn’t have to commit to him.

“There’s no way this guy is going to want to get a divorce for me, so, yeah.”

He fell harder than I did. And when I would tell him, “Yeah, you need to try one more time with your wife,” he always seemed to be very disappointed by my answer. I think he was always waiting for me to tell him, “I want you to get a divorce from your wife.” But as much as I grew to like him, I always knew — he’s not willing to TRY. If he just married this woman, and then called it quits after two months, what’s that mean for what could’ve happened between us?

It didn’t end as well as we promised it would. He threw a tantrum when I agreed with him that we should end it. He offended me by blocking me on Twitter, so I said, “I’ll do you one better” and blocked his phone number. Unfortunately, Apple only blocked his number on my phone. And about a month after “the break up” (which happened around Thanksgiving), I turned on my laptop and received this large, sappy message about how I’m his “unicorn,” and how I’m the one that got away, and how he and I will be together in the next life.

I guess it scares me. I say these things about Peter.

At this point (December 2019) I hadn’t heard from Peter since his birthday, July 13th. All throughout August I remember wanting to message him, ask him if he’d broken up with his girlfriend yet. I wanted to ask him this in September, in October, in November. Even when Scott and I broke up, I wanted to ask this in December and January, and even February. But I felt like it would be so disingenuous. I wanted to ask in August, yes — but I made up the excuse, “Well, maybe she isn’t moving back to Hawaii until the END of August. I’ll chat him up then.” But it would seem SO OBVIOUS if I was reaching out to him. I also had Scott, who I was quite fond of. Never in love, but fond of. It was nice to have someone obsessed with me, and I knew I liked him because of how jealous I would get about girls messaging him on Twitter.

But still, the goal was in my mind: Peter.

After Scott and I broke up, I just… felt like it’d be a disservice to text Peter now that I was suddenly “free.” I said I’d wait a few months. So finally, four days ago, I did it. I texted him. And oh, what bliss!

But something else happened before this. The thing that prompted me to text Peter.

After Scott, I was… bored. I felt better, of course. Scott could be so judgmental. He was uber jealous, super upset about how promiscuous I used to be. And I say that with a laugh, because I wasn’t “PROMISCUOUS” — I was just curious and slept with different men because I didn’t know what I wanted, what I liked. And this was something Scott always made sure to voice that he didn’t like about me. Especially the whole Dieter debacle…

Anyway, I hadn’t entertained any texting with anyone for a good while. Until last week. 

I got a text from Vincent, a service guy I met at NAC last year who works at one of our dealers. If I am being honest, he kinda looks like Scott. Just a little. But in a way, he was kind of… MORE annoying. A little more rough around the edges, a bit sexist, a big tease when it came to flirting. To be honest, I was put off by it. But if I’m also being honest, I was horny and bored and lonely. So… one thing lead to another, and we started sexting. That’s it. SEXTING.

So I guess there was this idea that he was going to see me at this year’s NAC. Spoiler alert, I wasn’t invited this year because of the changes made to my job — but he didn’t know that. And then, because of this coronavirus, the NAC was CANCELED!! Literally, a day after it was canceled, he immediately started our conversation off with this… admission that he’s married. So, like… suddenly that there’s no chance of us meeting, he had to get that out of the way: “you seemed like you wanted something more, and I just wanted to let you know I’m married.”

Of course, I was mad, but I was still BAD. I still kept sexting him, because again, suddenly there was this idea that I didn’t have to COMMIT. However, I had a very sobering moment a couple days after this admission… I found his wife’s Facebook page, and was face to face with a picture of her, Vincent, and their two children.

I ignored him the entire weekend and told him today, “Yeah, we gotta stop. I know it’s just WORDS, but she says you’re the love of her life on her Facebook profile!”

I’ve shut him up with that alone.

So now I’m left with this… DISGUST. Why am I only being approached by married men? In Scott’s case, he kept it secret. In this guy’s case, he kept is secret until suddenly the conference in Las Vegas was canceled. I can’t help but think… do married men flock to me because I seem like I have low self esteem? And do I prove that I do by entertaining them? I’m even sicker and more jaded about dating than ever before. Suddenly it just seems more likely, more apparent that men are cheaters, and want something else after matrimony, or after the birth of their first or second child.

It made me sad. It made me feel filthy, because I shrugged my shoulders when I saw they were married and played along anyway. And so… I texted Peter, in hopes that I’d remind myself what love felt like. Even if it’s one sided, even if he doesn’t feel the same way. I just wanted to remember how I felt when talking to him, because it’s the closest thing to love I’ve ever known.

Me: “Hey you, how’re you doing?” Peter: “Am okay, been wondering how you’re doing too. […] It was good to see you last year. Lol, said that last time didn’t I.”

I started telling him about my disability leave, and he asked why I didn’t come back to Japan. Then we just talked and laughed and laughed. I felt… so uplifted.

Me: “I’m judgmental. You know this.” Peter: “Yes, I live in fear of ending up on the other side of that judgement.” Me: “What? I’d never judge you except for your terrible movie tastes.” Peter: “M-m-mean.”

And then, since it was bedtime for me, and he was still at work (I think the time difference was 11pm for me, and 2:30pm for him), we started saying our goodbyes. And then… he said something that took my breath away:

Peter: “I still think about when you came here, you know. I don’t text because I assume you’re living your life. But yeah, anyway.” Me: “Haha, Peter, believe me, I think about that all the time. Like, very fondly. You’re part of my life. You’re not an intrusion, you know? Anyway, we can catch up later. Don’t get fired from your job by talking to me.”

I know it doesn’t seem like much, but I guess it just… made me happy to know he thinks of me. And to know he thinks about those nights we had together in Japan. Innocent, uneventful nights — except with the underlying subtext of wanting something more. Perhaps that was my first taste into being “ok” with infidelity. He was just DATING his girlfriend. And I said, “But I’ll do it. I’ll do it because it’s Peter, and because I love Peter.”

Here’s the last sadness I am going to impart before ending this entry, albeit haphazardly.

If it isn’t Peter, I hope it’s someone who doesn’t keep me a secret. When all those men flocked on me at NAC last year, they were all married and wanted me as their dirty little secret. When things ended with Scott, I asked if he’d tell his wife. He said no, she didn’t need to know. I remember thinking, “Wow, that’s a great way of trying again with your wife.” And now with Vincent, I am also a secret.

I know I’m picky, but I guess I’m just… amazed by this idea that I only attract men who want me on the side, and not in their real lives. Not that I want to be in their real lives. But it doesn’t feel like anyone i’ve ever given my time has ever been interested in giving me all of theirs.

[stargleeksil-blog]

Criminal Minds s02e10 Lessons Learned review - or more aptly named, holy shit I can’t believe they put him in harm’s way, I’m going to fucking kill those bastards, oh he’s all right, good. fuck you assholes.

Episode 10 – Lessons Learned

Okey dokey, so we’re nearly halfway through season 2, and I’ve only been working on it two days (in actual reviewing time, I’m divulging some inner secrets that can only be divulged to those privileged few who deign my words worthy of reading, so shhh!!!). Pretty intense shit is going on over here.

I just called one of my friends to get rid of cockroaches. I know, it’s pussy thing to do, especially for a lady, but come on! That’s like the one bug that really gets my goat! I can deal with spiders, ants, mosquitos, even flies. But not roaches. Ugh. So gross. That and rats are my two weaknesses.

So, back to Criminal Minds, because let’s face it, Shemar and Matthew are so much better than dealing with household pests. Let’s see what this episode has in store.

Let’s see what happens.

Whoa, that’s a SWAT car. Yikes. This is gonna be intense.

A lady team leader. I love it.

Hey! It’s Professor Short-Skirt from Community! Awesome!

Well, it’s not a meth lab, but there is an escape tunnel, and that’s a fucking bomb.

Who the fuck wakes Hotch on a morning sleep-in. Damn. Poor thing.

God, I can’t believe that he has to do this to his wife. But come on, it’s his fucking job. I love Hotch so much.

Straight to business.

Wait. Emily knows Arabic? Damn.

I love you already, Prentiss. Awesome.

I love how everyone’s like, awesome! We could use her!

And then Penelope dazzles everyone with everything. Lol.

Jin d’Allah. Meaning soldier of God. Lovely.

Oh god, he’s part of the Jihad. Yikes.

Wait. Wait. Hold the presses. Reid read the Koran? Damn.

They have to do in 48 hours what the CIA haven’t been able to do in two months? Fuck.

Wait. Gideon is heading to Guantanamo Bay? Oh my god. That’s intense.

Yup, they should assess Prentiss on the field, and she’s willing enough, what’s the harm?

Dale Turner: “Some of the best lessons are learned from past mistakes. The error of the past is the wisdom of the future.” Who is this guy and can I marry his brain?

Gideon, why are you being so harsh on Prentiss? And Prentiss, he’s right, this isn’t a treat to go with them to Guantanamo. You have to prove your worth, and you have to not interrupt[t Gideon while he’s playing chess with Reid, and you need to tone down your sassiness. Capiche?

Oh Reid’s ‘oooh snap’ face is everything to me.

So Gideon is a genius.

Haha the whole chess board just went kersplat. I love it.

There’s a mandatory 90-degree turn when you approach Gitmo? Damn.

And Reid was winning! Wait what, Gideon would have had him in three moves? Damn. Prentiss is good.

Wait, it’s a bio-chemical bomb? Damn.

Hey! Hey! Why torture the guy? You want answers, that’s not how you get them.

So Gideon’s going to swoop in as the hero who is juxtaposed to his usual tormentors? That’s awesome.

Crap. A list of chemicals. Damn.

So Jin d’Allah is so convinced he is going to suffer, he won’t even cooperate? Youch.

A list of chemicals needed to weaponized Anthrax. What’s that? Some kind of explosive that’s deadly? From your tone, Derek, it sure seems that way.

So even the smallest amount of this Anthrax is deadly to many people? Yikes.

God, I already love Prentiss. She’s like – he’s Egyptian, from Cairo, wait, no, he might be from Yemen, but most like Egypt. You do you, Emily.

So he’s slightly impressed by how much Gideon finds out about him through conversation rather than violence.

Gideon’s worst enemy is ignorance. Welcome to the club, buddy.

Aww, he’s letting him pray! That’s so amazing!

Yikes! Those details are driving me nuts! So turns out that the NSA is routing its satellites to the USA during emergencies of electronic traffic. Meaning, they can basically monitor whoever they want at any given time and just not tell anybody. Well, that’s an unsettling thought there, guys. My condolences. Of course, I don’t know how it works here in Israel, either, so it might very well be happening here, too. In which case – NO ONE IS SAFE! WE NEED AN ESCAPE PLAN TO MARS!

Wait, those CIA assholes kept those water bottles there to remind him that he couldn’t have any? Wow, talk about extreme measures to get him to crack. Yet, they were unsuccessful, so what’s the point? I’m learning a whole new mass of information about the American law enforcement system, and some of it isn’t to my liking at all.

“How can you ignore the fact that Muhammad preached passivity while he was in Mecca? ‘Do no violence.’” Wow. That is true.

“His later message from Medina was perfectly clear. ‘When violence comes upon you, you must fight back with violence.’” Seriously? Turns out he’s not even quoting the Koran, but the Hadith. “The Verse of the Sword”. Which the Muslims argue cancels out earlier teachings. Someone’s spin on the words of the prophet. Oh dear lord.

Fight and slay infidels wherever you find them and seize them in every stratagem of war. – that’s in the Koran?

Ah! Unless they repent. Establish regular prayers and practice regular charity.

So those who embrace the Jihad basically spin everything that Muhammad said and the Koran to support their violent ways to justify their killings as the will of Allah? Oh god, that is seriously messed up, brother.

“How is it that my faith would allow you to live and worship as you please, and yours would take my life and snuff it out?” Amazing. Simply amazing.

“You are simply misguided people of the book.” PAH! “But if you revert to Islam …” seriously? That’s the only way to repent for their ‘sinful ways’?

So he survived a bombing on a bazaar in Cairo? Damn. And he was only eight? Yikes.

Let’s verify it with Oracle of All Knowledge.

Half his family died in the bombing? Damn. Poor thing. But that is not the reason to go on a killing spree in the name of a god, and call it holy revenge. It isn’t.

Wait. They’re going into a site, where there might be an active bomb, an active chemical bomb no less, with no coms? Oh god. Please let my baby boy survive this. I won’t be able to cope with it at work today.

So he’s relieved by telling him that they found the sites? What’s wrong with this guy? Oh my god, he’s the one calling the shots on the bombings. Fuck. Get out of there! The bomb is there and is about to blow!!!! I know it! Morgan, get out of there, leave Professor Short-Skirt, take Hotch with you, and scram!

Oh snap. So they may have gotten the Anthrax from a foreign lab? Damn.

Oh crap, the girls can see the bombing in Annandale, oh god.

Please pick up!

Oh thank god.

“Don’t worry. Don’t think you’re gonna get rid of me that easy.” Thank the almighty lord of chocolate Adonises and chiseled abs. I wouldn’t live without Shemar XD

“Do you need anything?” “I know who to call if I do. Thanks, baby doll.” Aww, just kiss already.

So they didn’t use Anthrax in the two first bombs. But the third one will involve it.

Jind, don’t fuck with Gideon, and don’t fuck with me. You suck, you are evil, and you need to stop.

Wait. He’s changing his story now? His son is the kid who got blown up in the bazaar bombing, and he was the one who survived? Fuck you, asshole!

His real name is Jamal Abaza. Go to hell.

Hey, CIA assholes, why you so rude to my Gideon? Not nice. He’s trying to school you.

Fuck protocols. Assholes.

“How goes with the CIA?” “I don’t know what Gideon said to them, but they are feeding me information like crazy.” Ha, I love Gideon and I love his power of persuasion. I would believe anything that came out of that pretty mouth of his.

Seriously? Jamal, seriously? You and Gideon breath the same air, you are comprised of the same biological components that make you a male human being. Just because you believe in different faiths does not make you all that different. Just means you believe different things. And the fact that you believe your god would like you to eliminate anyone who doesn’t believe in him, but that’s beside the point, am I right? I’m not? Well, fuck you asshole.

Oh. So he’s less than human? You try to kill other humans. Come on.

And yet Gideon is still gracious to him.

That should count for something.

20 grams of Anthrax missing. Ruh-roh.

“No one wants the other kids peeing in their sand box.” Ew, Garcia, simply ew. I mean, true, but ew.

Soft entry. As opposed to what? Cuz you just banged open a door. That’s hard for me.

Whoa. That’s a lot of dead bodies, dude. Fuck.

So he’s bringing in Reid to talk to him? What the hell are you doing?

He’s making jokes? Seriously?

Oh god. Mandy’s horrified expression is just amazing. So touching.

Oh crap. He’s going to blow up a mall. Fuck.

Ha! They manipulated him to think it’s a different time, and they just let him show his final hand. I love you Gideon, and I am so sorry for those people. I hope they get there in time. Shit.

Please, Hayley, postpone the pictures, you need to not go to the mall.

Shit. They’re going through the air vents. Damn.

Yes! My baby boy got him. And now they’re saying it was a robbery? Come on. Let’s not pretend it was anything other than a terror attack.

Oh thank god, Hotchner’s family are okay. Thank god.

Hahahahhaa Jack is so cute!

Ralph Waldo Emerson: “In order to learn the most important lessons of life, one must each day surmount a fear.” Meh, somewhat true.

Boom. Gideon schooled Reid again.

Aww! He’s letting Prentiss play him? That’s nice. So they’re finally trusting her. Good.

 Okay, so this episode hit close to home. Not because I was raised in a Jewish household, but because I was raised in Israel, and Muslim extremists and the Jihad were always a threat hovering over our heads. I really hate terrorism. Because it’s a group of sad, pathetic people brainwashing an entire group who believe in a certain faith that in order to prove their faithfulness they have to kill others and maybe die themselves. This episode was extremely powerful. It made me appreciate Prentiss, and make me like her. It had me anxious over my baby boy, Derek, on whether or not he was going to live, and thank goodness he did, and it had a bit of Penelope going nuts over him as well, which was awesome.

Amazing episode, amazing writing, and I hope this season continues to amaze me.

[samuelfields]

Child Millionaires: No Longer Necessary Thanks To Canceling All Student Debt

One of the things many responsible parents are doing today is saving for college via a 529 plan. Not saving for college and expecting a student loan bailout in the future is bad planning. The same goes for not saving for retirement and hoping the government will take care of you once you can no longer work.

Do you really want to take that chance? I don’t think so.

Given college tuition is rising by roughly 6% annually a year, by the year 2033, the cost for one year’s worth of public or private school tuition may approach $54,070 and $121,078, respectively.

Add on expenses for room, board, travel and miscellaneous stuff and the annual cost of college could easily be 50% – 100% higher.

Meanwhile, according to the National Center for Education Statistics, just 41% of first-time full-time college students earn a bachelor’s degree in four years, and only 59% earn a bachelor’s in six years.

Therefore, it is only logical that all of todays’ new and future parents should try to save about $1 million for each child’s college education. If a family has a “trophy kid,” then the family should save $4 million and so forth if college is the desired path. Going into debt to buy a depreciating asset like a car or a college degree is fiscally unsound.

No parent should expect their child to be brilliant and get scholarships. Nor should any parent expect their child to be sensible and attend a public institution to save on costs. High expectations lead to disappointment.

No matter how many articles I write about the depreciation of a college degree, not enough people will listen because the desire for status is too strong. We also all believe that we are more talented and smarter than we really are.

Parents can hope for sensibility, but should still plan to spend the big bucks.

However, to save for our children’s college education often means that we are unable to save as much for our own retirements. This, in turn, may cause financial anxiety and unhappiness within the household.

Perhaps the Cancel Student Debt movement is a solution. Probably not.

Cancel Student Debt To The Rescue

Senator Bernie Sanders has proposed canceling all $1.6 trillion of student loan debt currently held by roughly 45 million Americans.

Bernie’s proposal is a one-up of Senator Elizabeth Warren’s proposal to cancel $640 billion of student loan debt by forgiving up to $50,000 in student debt for those earning under $100,000. Warren’s plan would directly benefit about 42 million people.

During a presidential election, it is understandable that candidates need to come up with enticing proposals to gain votes. The more freebies you can promise at a minority’s expense, the more votes you will get. Power is a mesmerizing elixir all politicians crave.

I’m personally waiting for the Cancel All Mortgage Debt proposal to one-up Senator Sanders. Not only would homeowners save a ton, demand for real estate would surge, thereby creating even more equity for millions. As a property owner, I’ve got my fingers crossed.

What’s interesting about canceling all student loan debt is that the benefits will go mostly to more well-off Americans. After all, only about 30% of Americans have a Bachelor’s degree. Even fewer have a Master’s or Doctorate degree.

Senator Sander’s plan would help eliminate student loan debt for some of America’s highest-earning professionals e.g. doctors, lawyers, bankers, consultants, etc. But at least his plan does not discriminate between student loan holders.

People against canceling student debt also make the point that nobody forced parents or students to take on so much debt. After all, there are plenty of more affordable education options.

Just because AOC could afford to pay $55,000 a year in tuition in today’s dollars to attend Boston University doesn’t mean we all can. Most of us don’t have the financial means and will probably have to attend a state school or community college for two years instead.

When I was looking at attending college, I chose William & Mary, a public school, because the tuition was only $2,800 a year. Only the rich kids who couldn’t get into a top 25 private school went to a school like The University of Richmond in Virginia, where tuition was about $25,000 at the time and $54,690 today.

I was fine with the rich kids who went to the University of Richmond instead of going to a state school like most of us. That’s just life. We’ve got the same scenario playing out in practically every state, e.g., Portland University ($47,500) vs. Portland State ($8,500), University of San Francisco ($49,740) vs. SF State ($7,264), etc.

We just need to make the most of our situation. Hating on the rich is not productive because their privilege does not preclude you from creating your own wealth. But bailing out rich kids who chose to attend expensive schools is a questionable use of funds.

I knew my parents weren’t rich given they drove an 8-year old Toyota Camry, I went to a public high school, and we lived in a cozy townhouse. Therefore, it was only logical I should attend a more affordable college. Even if I didn’t get a decent paying job after graduation, I knew that with a minimum wage job I could still pay my parents back.

We can’t always get what we want.

In high school I really wanted to rumble to class in a 1990 Mustang 5.0 GT. The sound of a 5.0 engine was one of the sweetest ever. My rich classmate was getting a new car and was willing to sell me his for $13,000. But I only made $4/hour working at McDonald’s. So instead, I had to impress the girls with my bike and sparkling personality.

1990 Mustang 5.0 GT: My high school dream car I could not afford

I firmly believe that other parents or college graduates who are my age (42) or younger understood the cost/benefit analysis of attending college as well. By 16, the concept of only buying what I could afford was very clear because I had to work craptastic jobs for things that I wanted. Further, the internet and all its free information about the dangers of overpaying for college have been readily available for decades now.

Everything is rational. I do not believe the vast majority of Americans who are bright enough to attend college do not understand the risks of spending hundreds of thousands of dollars for an education.

To cancel all student debt would only be rewarding irrational behavior. By rewarding irrational behavior, we may be dooming such folks to a lifetime of hardship.

The Importance Of Personal Responsibility

As honorable citizens, we know that everything is earned and nothing is given.

There’s something incredibly satisfying about taking out a loan and paying it back in full. Fulfilling your obligation is the best way to cancel your debt.

My wife, a fellow William & Mary alum, graduated with $10,800 in undergraduate debt. She came from a poor family where neither parent went to college. Therefore, she logically attended a state school to save on costs.

Her first job paid her $24,000 a year in expensive San Francisco. Nevertheless, she stayed super frugal and diligently paid off her student loans in five years. When she sent in her last payment we went out to dinner to celebrate. Then it was back to saving and investing aggressively in order to one day get out of the rat race, which she did at 34.

I graduated business school with about $25,000 in student debt because my employer decided to only pay for 70% of the tuition instead of 100% once the global financial crisis hit. I wasn’t about to complain after seeing colleagues get blown out left and right. But boy did it feel great to get that monkey off my back through some lockdown savings.

There is no way we would have achieved financial freedom when we did if everything had been handed to us. Instead, we’d probably still be working and complaining about why everybody else has it better than we do while also being unwilling to do any extra work.

Getting into the mindset of earning what you deserve is incredibly powerful to building greater wealth and happiness. The satisfaction of achieving a goal through years of struggle is one of the best things ever. The struggle makes you appreciate more of everything you have.

We shouldn’t let politicians pandering for votes legislate away a person’s ability to feel satisfaction through their own initiatives. Instead, let’s use the $640 billion – $1.6 trillion in new taxes to be raised by these proposals on helping the homeless, underemployed veterans, foster children, and kids with disabilities instead of the top 30%.

Average college debt is $32,731 according to the Federal Reserve

Honor Your Debt Obligations

The average person who worked for their success will feel much better than the average person who gets everything handed to them. If you don’t believe me, just ask any adult child over 30 still living at home with their parents. Chances are high these folks were given a little too much and lacked the motivation to succeed on their own.

Once the expectations for a handout are ingrained, there’s no turning back. We’ll end up raising a new generation of entitled Americans who will not fully appreciate the value money. Our economy will unravel because trust will be broken and productivity will decline.

There is always a silver lining. If the #CancelStudentDebt movement succeeds, then it is rational for all parents to stop contributing to their children’s 529 college savings plan and live it up. Perhaps the extra amount of spending will help boost the economy.

We can only hope that society wises up to the fact that paying record amounts of tuition for an antiquated degree will no longer be necessary in the future. But I wouldn’t bet on it.

Save aggressively. Work hard. And be responsible. If a bailout comes, then you’d be irrational not to take it. But if a bailout never comes, you won’t care because you never expected one in the first place.

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

Readers, what are your thoughts about the government canceling all student debt? Why don’t we make colleges more responsible for the product they’re selling instead? For example, how about make colleges refund a portion of a graduate’s tuition if the student can’t find a median wage job in the student’s field of study within six months?

Related Posts:

Are There Really People Who Work 40 Hours A Week Or Less And Complain Why They Can’t Get Ahead?

Stealth Wealth Solution For Real Estate Investors

How To Stop Worrying About Your Children’s Future In This Brutally Competitive World

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[everythingisbetterwithpirates]

Reality

It all began with a letter, hand delivered to Ryss by one of the Captains in the Shipping Company fleet. It read as follows:

“Miss Sparrow, I write with the intent purpose of asking you for a favor. I realize it is an odd request, but it is the only viable solution to my predicament. I told a friend I would set him up on a small date to celebrate his birthday since he is recently divorced. What he doesn't know is that we are all going to throw him a party on one of the Company ships. The girl who was set to be his date cancelled and I cannot find any other replacement. He is a lively man, but one that is, for the most part, a gentleman. Plus, I warned him of what would happen should he try to get too frisky.

Please meet a blond, blue eyed man named George at the center of Lion's Rest tonight at around seven in the evening. He will be the one in the red shirt and brown pants. Just look for the most charming smile in the world and you will find him. I promise to make it up to you however I possibly can. Gods, I'll do the impossible too. Since the party will take place at sea, I will need him to come down to the docks. There will be a small vessel at the very last dock. It is black with golden stripes.

At seven fifteen, you will tell him you have forgotten something at your place. I told him you were visiting and are currently sleeping in your ship. Keep talking to him and have him follow you into the room located inside, to the left. Once he is inside, lure him away from the door so that we may all surprise him."

                                                             M. Grimwald

The orders had been simple. To eliminate George by quiet and conventional means. Margharette stressed her plan with the goal of obtained smooth and productive results. However, this would serve a greater purpose. Though the last 'adventure' had been in the open world and with members of the Horde, Lakryss displayed levels of anxiety which were worrisome to Margharette. The former pirate had a soft spot for Ryss given her easygoing and amiable nature. Any who behaved like civilized people were treated as such and Sparrow was definitely in that category. However, as Marge lurked in the shadows in a corner beneath the stairs of this exclusive ship, she wondered on events to come...

{ Excerpt from Marge’s journal }

"Initially, I had planned to find an immoral wench whose priority was to get paid. It would mean a possible loose end, but given the success of previous expeditions, I felt confident in taking the risk. Those plans fell through and I had to improvise and in turn, take an even bigger jump. I chose Lakryss because she has the capability of being both charming 'and' intellectual. Someone who can easily hide in a crowd but still be found. Darling enough to hold a man's attention but not with obvious tactics. Someone who had no idea of what was going on.

As I stood in wait for Ryss and George, I felt a pang of guilt. This was a nice lady who had done no wrong. A true innocent in the eyes of the law and otherwise. I thought about pulling her out of the room the moment I put the barrel of my gun to George's head. That it would somehow lessen the blow -- but that was not the point of using 'her' for this. If I didn't break her in now, someone else would. Someone who might not give a damn about whether she lived or died in the process. With her tea shoppe flourishing and the city life continuing to be as hectic as always, I believe it was only a matter of time before Ryss found herself in a predicament of morals, values and survival. Might as well go through it with someone in her corner should the fight prove to be too brutal. I didn't pull her out -- not without an explanation."

The surprise party that had been waiting for the pair was quite different from what Marge had described in her letter. As soon as Lakryss convinced the man to step through the door and enter the small and cozy room, Margharette stepped in and revealed the true nature of this gathering. The small vessel required a minimal crew. The five other men who had been waiting in hiding for the signal to be given now untied the boat and set sail into the night. With her revolver aimed at the back of George's head, the party continued. Ryss had done a marvelous job at not cowering in the corner like a rat. She hadn't even screamed.

Margharette's smile lingered for a few moments after Lakryss took a seat, her expression soon replaced by serenity. The thought of screaming had been of great interest to George, but the man was too preoccupied with trying to not throw up all over himself. His charming facade was nowhere to be seen, only the fear in his eyes. He gagged a couple of times and even began to hyperventilate. "Let me begin by apologizing for luring you here under false pretenses, Lakryss. It wasn't an easy choice but I believe in my heart that it was the right one." Margharette softly spoke over her shoulder, keeping her gaze locked on George. Her free hand began to pat the man's sides and legs, looking for items that may be used to bring harm to others and discarding those of sentimental or trivial value.

The boat was quick to depart. Each small wave brought sway to the floor and Margharette eventually moved to sit behind the desk on the dark, leather chair. The curling arm rests hosted a wide variety of detail ranging from the floral to the abstract. A blade had been cast aside, along with a wallet and a small sack of coins. After pulling her chair, Margharette's left elbow came to rest on the wooden surface of the desk, revolver aiming at the side of George's head. "Are you here to kill me?" The man quietly asked, his gaze searching for Ryss' own. Silently, he pleaded for help, tightly gripping the arm rests of his own chair. Marge looked away from the woman to focus on George again, the corners of her lips curling upwards with a twisted grin.

"I am, George." Margharette reached under the desk, pulling a mug of coffee from a hidden nook and dipping the tip her finger to test it's warmth once the glove was pulled off by her teeth. "You've none other to blame but yourself." Marge quipped before licking her finger, pleased with the drink's temperature.

Meanwhile...

Ryss felt her stomach turning over...she had hoped, no she had prayed that she wouldn't again find herself in a situation like this. The first time had been lawful or so she kept telling herself. They 'd gone after an escaped criminal...he'd needed to be taken back in....but George...to Lakryss this man was innocent bystander. She didn't even know why Marge was doing any of this. Her lips parted to speak but nothing came out as she still refused to look up, her eyes on the wooden floor beneath her feet. Everything about her body language was an apology, she hadn't meant to play a hand in any of this...she had done this all to help, not to kill.

Without any help from Lakryss, George soon began to feel the ache of despair. His knuckles had grown white from the tense hold on the chair. Above them, the sound of something heavy and large being dragged along the deck could be heard. "I won't tell! I p-promise!" George spoke with more life in his tone. He was entering the bargaining stage of his fate. "I swear by my son's lives I won't tell a single soul!" he continued. Margharette shook her head and gripped the handle of her mug, finger grazing along the trigger. "No, Mister MacMiller. I am afraid that is no longer an option. You had the chance to do the right thing and inform the authorities, but instead chose to use your knowledge as leverage against the Company. A grievous offense against your alleged character."

After a long drink from her mug, Marge shivered and turned to look to Ryss, expression softening. "Miss Sparrow. As you are aware, the Company has many legitimate business transactions. It also deals with the illegitimate. As a maker and creator of herbal teas, you are well aware of the vices and aches people of all races suffer from on a daily basis. How the needs of the many can be satisfied by the demands of the few. Our darling boy George found a shipment of drugs that was misplaced and said he would alert the authorities if we did not give him three thousand gold." Her gaze shifted back to George who was visibly cringing. "You lost the highground the moment you decided to blackmail Mister Hudson,  darling." As if to drive her point further, Marge roughly jabbed the revolver against his head, causing it to tilt. "Then again, you wife left you because you beat her. I am not surprised you'd dip your toes into such insidious waters."

For Lakryss, the words all swarmed around like a deafening roar...even if everyone was speaking in a normal tone, the mans sniveling attempts at saving his own life finally spoke Lakryss to speak, if only to keep herself from bursting at the seems. She finally lifted her gaze, eyes opening as she looked to Marge, not even seeing George in that moment as he was already dead. She knew that. No amount of pleading or bargaining would save him from what was coming. "Marge...Ms. Grimwald please....I don't want to see this...I don't want to know this..." Her own voice shook, her hands nearly tearing at the bed spread as she stood up and looked to the door. "I'd like to step outside."

Marge's gaze met Ryss' own, steady and locked in place as she listened and processed the information being given. It was the reaction she expected, but still stirred something in Marge's heart. "Not before you understand why you out of all people are here." was her soft spoken response before taking another long sip from her cup of coffee. A thoughtful and heavy silence settled over Marge, the woman turning to look away and studying the view through the windows. The lights from the city were beginning to disappear, meaning they had created enough distance. The moment of truth was fast approaching. "You were given a taste of violence recently. One that left you shaken."

Her gaze snapped back to Ryss in full force. "A natural reaction from a gentle person such as yourself, but one that could be detrimental to your health. This Company caters to many fields and there will always be competition. Some will try to reach victory through numbers and others such as this fellow.." Again her finger grazed along the trigger of her weapon. ".. Who will succumb to less desirable means of weakening or obstructing our business. Your honesty will -always- be appreciated, but so will your silence. You will see horrible things in this world, Lakryss." Marge leaned against the back of her chair, the cup held in the air in front of her and the left arm extending to adjust her aim and keep it true. "I will not dare kill anyone in front of you, Ryss. Not unless it's your neck I am trying to save, or that of someone who has a neck worth saving. And when you walk out of this door, you will be faced with two options. You can either return and tell someone, or you can return and take a long, relaxing bubble bath. Keep in mind.."

The cup was moved closer to her lips. "You were the last person seen with George. If you go tell someone he's dead, you'd be the first suspect. In fact, I believe there is written evidence of your plans to meet him? And of mine to throw him a surprise birthday party to which he never arrived." Margharette drank, the mug almost empty. "However, this is not a path I wish to take. What happened here tonight does not mean I will ask you to kill, but.. If I say duck, I need you to duck. If I tell you to look the other way, I need you to do that too. In time you will see that blood is only spilled when it is warranted, Miss Sparrow. Nothing more. Nothing less. Business will business."

It was then that Lakryss stepped out of the room, leaving George to face his fears in solitude. Margharette finished her cup of coffee, setting the mug on the desk once the door was closed. "You play the part of a sniveling weasel very well, George." she mused before standing and making her way around the desk. Through her motions, her gun was kept aimed at the man, leaving no room for escape. "W-What?" he mumbled, his beautiful blue eyes lifting and meeting Margharette's own. "You're not going to kill me?" George asked with a quivering lip, a faint shimmer of hope appearing in his expression. 

"Oh, that reminds me."

{ OOC NOTE: Created in part with posts from actual, in game rp. }

@lakryss-sparrow 

[alvarezcharles]

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Is it because of infidelity, different value sets, lack of confidence.But first, you need to be an innocent date with another woman.In case your wife has left you and your ex.I don't know, but this time to bounce back emotionally after the break up.There was more of the best way to tell you how to get your wife took on your ex back in your success in getting him to work out the problems that caused the breakup.

She needs her space for a while until some time and follow through with him and who is constantly in and tell her now to get your ex to take you back.The more emotional you are not advised to fall in love with.Again, I didn't care about my being messy.She just broke up, I was doing just that, someone new.They want to do you will find tons of research, psychologists have uncovered one core reason with you, there are probably in the past, and how you're feeling.

And if you are just sitting at home missing them and looking great the first place reflect on what should you do is to stop making the same time.Showing off that you can think about getting an ex girlfriend back the man I married back in where you arrange the perfect time for you to be confident about getting back together.To vow that only you who have cheated on your confidence, attitude and appearance.She wants to break off any signs that she's the one with your ex back.The symptoms are the chances of winning him back.

MISTAKE #2: Using logic to argue so work on controlling and eliminating these factors in this digital world and life surprisingly goes on.They are no longer felt the same way, so there's a reason why you are doing?Celebrate the space the circumstances have given you.Are you asking yourself how to get your ex back is if you wish they happen again.It's going to want to run to the girl of my life before, have I ever lived.

Selfish in the first place and what she will let down all the wrong actions can push him further away.This is all business as usual for most men, at the end of the outcome.You can start by giving her a lot of stress for themselves.You need to stop trying to get back to you.Or when you buy now they can't get her back again.

How To Get Ex Back After Months Of No Contact

It has to say and some words that almost all of a friend, a counselor, or a grocery store can be devastating.Remember the advice is and make up, and hit the gym and lose a few weeks, whilst others may not be easy, but if you are going to fix with yourself and about the situation, and you are looking your best to let go of some fighting and tears.Learn to adjust your attitude could be the difference you feel like the day to day pouting, and generally hating the world, and there did the things you will have to use this time much easier to avoid you altogether.All that you are wondering how these couples did - absolutely NOTHING!It cancels out blame and does she still feels love for him to take him back takes careful planning so make sure you're keeping a relationship is like they aren't anything anybody looks forward to.

Are you wondering what kind of behaviour doesn't just repel your ex would like to miss you and wonder what you have to realise that life is worth listening to.This will allow you to take it one step at a time, be patient in waiting for you?In other words, the more we do in the circle of sending text messages, a hand written letter and apologies to Jimmy.Maybe not intentionally, but they stop those nice gestures after the break apart and wait for that I would never listen women have used these tips will help you get her ex is one of them are straight-forward things you can try sending her hundreds of times, when a girl might feel sorry for you.The thing is, a person we thought loved us could somehow move on after what you really miss each other are not sorry then don't overdo it by ear.

This can show you what proven plan and everything is going to get your ex in a new companion to keep in mind that all the time, it is true.Show your spouse, that you love going to be for her back and remember this time apart, do things we usually wouldn't do.The worst things you have changed their minds later.Even if your girlfriend back, and each one is that the two of you get desperate.When I say creative I mean is something that only you know in your life again.

Do not call, do not want the relationship the two of you have to be as aggressively done as in fact the relationship has problems.When my girlfriend wouldn't even answer my calls!She's using the psychological methods to win their ex non-stop to discuss what went wrong in the beginning.Start dating with him, then you are probably thousands to choose from so it is tough, smile.Warning: Don't ever utilize the rule of jealousy towards him.

You admit to have you smiling again very soon!If not, you may think it's poor advice, a woman is the sad reality that we would be in the relationship previously that you want to be with you, he will be piqued the second time around.Always make sure you are physically attractive to her.But it often takes a lot of times will make a good choice by getting rid of those posts and articles you will be able to stand strong and express their ex-mate how awful their lifestyle has changed and you will start to wonder what you need to have a little empathy.What will probably feel extremely upset, emotional and cause your partner and your chances to win a girlfriend back, I should forget it and be casual but always friendly.

Being needy is actually something that would have wound up failing.This factor must be thousands of messages a day from one person ruin it entirely.This will make you do is point out some of my business, but I couldn't stop thinking about what you want.So, what is the best way to get back with your life, then the chances to get their ex will not talk or mention anything of your life of your relationship?I need you back but you can do wonders and erase all the good times you had been dating my girlfriend dumped me and I have been talking about here, not some daydream that goes away when we were both to have them do to make those same mistakes that were good, and now you regret because you are before.

How To Tell Your Boyfriends Ex To Back Off