#i NEED to learn to hide my feelings more
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(From the body swap AU)
Hii! I'm very happy to see that my body swap comic was so well received, so here's a little something as a thanks for all the support <3
I'm excited to keep sharing my drawings, I hope you like what I make!
#Aand that's how Rulie ended up insisting on keeping Lege's bag lol#They're besties your honor. He wouldn't trust his entire inventory to anyone else xD#This time I had less pages to worry about so I hope this feels a bit less rushed. I'm still figuring this out tho#I also need to learn how to properly draw them bc this has been a struggle lmao#Hyrule's also stressed about the situation he's just been doing a bit of a better job at hiding it lul#Oh they don't know what's coming <3.#Anyways it feels so wrong to draw “Hyrule” with a scowl 😭#I like drawing his hair mirrored specially since it helps make it more different from Legends but it's so hard to draw it from the long side#This is a mess I have no idea what to call them#I confuse myself sometimes while making these lmao#lu legend#lu hyrule#linked universe#lu fanart#body swap au#Ig I'll tag it like that#offmozzart#I thought about kinda spreading all my ideas over time so as to no overdo it so quick ig (+not going crazy over drawing the same characters)#but rn I'm excited to draw them out so I need to take advantage of that
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I think I'm in the "conscious incompetence" stage of being a social animal in the real world and it sucks so majorly. bro what do you do after you realize you're bad at socializing and then in-person interaction gets harder because you know you're failing at it now.
#Robin processes emotions on main#I WANT to get good at socializing#I used to be better and I'm now worse >:[#in some ways. in some ways I've improved (e.g. am kinder). but I used to have more confidence and an easier time staying present#now I'm always shutting down and running away#literally I leave the room and go calm down in my room#I want to learn to regulate that impulse and become a chill person to hang out with. but How#I've been struggling lately with punishing myself for running away (not physically but with like. spirals of self-recrimination)#I think one good step would be to get mindful about praising myself for small steps again. I'll change faster if im kinder to myself#also I think seeking reassurance from the people I'm around more often even if it seems silly would be good#ALSO. a major problem I'm facing is that I am living with my parents. and my little sisters. and I don't... I... it's rough.#I used to parent my 15 (then 9) y/o little sister when my parents were gone and I still struggle with feeling Responsible For Her#so every time she's a little cringe I end up feeling like it's my fault and I'm gonna be punished for it and I don't know how to deal with#—how to deal with it#BIG SIGH#I'm TRYING to become a good adult who can help others rather than just living in desperate self-defensive survival mode forever#but it's so hard bro#and another issue is that I'm growing further and further apart from my parents' fundamentalist brand of Christianity#and feeling more and more incapable of making friends and bringing them to visit me. because I have to be perfect around my parents#how can I make friends if I can't offer them hospitality??#how can I be a fully realized adult if I have to hide in plain sight??#I need to move out so bad. even if I'm lonely at first I HAVE to move out#in related news my seasonal job is Over and I'm looking for full-time work! please pray for me if you're the praying type or just#send me encouraging words#that would help#<33333 I will be ok it's just a bad situation rn
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Remember George's outline notes that had "joy of giving" and "mercy at the gate" for Arya? Mercy is crossed out and we obviously have that as her sample chapter, so what if Arya's next alias is "Joy"? Over-thinking the significance of that phrase and how it could apply to the rest of her Braavos arc🤔
#arya stark#asoiaf#something something /joy of giving/ could align with /all men must serve/ and Arya's apprenticeship with the courtesans#Arya learns more about courtly manners and becomes more comfortable with engaging in highborn spaces#while becoming more privy to Braavosi politics and how that connects to her responsibilities/identity as a Stark#when I imagine Arya reclaiming her identity I imagine it coming with her acceptance of even the /hard/ parts of her identity#I think Ned's words about /summer games/ and growing up will be incredibly relevant to her here#her reclaiming her identity while ignoring the /Lady/ aspect of it makes no sense...especially considering how often we're reminded of it#literally every time she reveals her identity it comes with people acknowledging her highborn status#one thing that makes me wish we had on-page Cat/Arya interactions cause I think her twow arc will be heavy on remembering Ned's words 😭#imagine her reuniting with Jeyne before she knows Bran+Rickon are alive and deciding to reclaim her identity at the unmasking festival#I have a pet theory that she could end up /taking responsibility/ for Jeyne's marriage to Ramsay in order to offer some protection to Jeyne#I think it fits considering she has a very protective nature and could feel guilty since she had the opportunity to reveal herself to Roose#basically I want the reclamation of her identity to be incredibly personal and about her feelings + values#which is why I like to imagine it happening before she's aware rickon+bran are alive but after she gets news that Jon is dead#I want her motivation to return home to be primarily about her internal development while outside factors are supporting#/need/ Arya exploring and accepting her identity in her own way#deciding to be Arya while her family is lost to her and that identity is connected to an unwanted marriage would feel so significant#(and yes it was Jeyne that was married to Ramsay but it was Arya's name used and it's still (partially) about/will impact her)#anyways I think about Arya's Braavosi arc a normal about can you tell? 😀#one day I won't put the majority of my post in the tags but today is not that day#I definitely thought too hard about this though that's why I have to hide it lol
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Puyo/Madou, meet ISAT. ISAT, meet Puyo/Madou. I'm sure you have everything in common and this is not at all a completely random crossover of my two current interests
#dont look at Salde for rhe love of my sanity do not even percieve Salde i dint kwno what ifmf doing g#art#fanart#ISAT#puyo puyo#in stars and time#madou monogatari#kitscribbles#sig puyo puyo#schezo wegey#arle nadja#ringo ando#sig really do be sig no last name#prince salde#their ages are different in this one. oldest to youngest - schezo > arle > sig > ringo > salde#you see that stubble on Sig thats baby stubble. thats unfortunate facial hair on a teenager#sometimes it works out for people still in their teens but not sig#Ringo is!! Perhaps a bit too young to travel!! She's basically a foreign exchange student#i have to admit all the roles and dynamics in ISAT are NOT 1:1 in this AU#i have it all mixed up#when i say sig and schezo are besties i mean theyre both awkward with people they just happen to have an understanding. also sig bullies hi#Sig is he/they here!! I dont usually mess with canon genders (hella respect those who do) but honestly i just like it for Sig...#I still need to learn more about Salde but imma just go ahead and say that Salde is kid gender#Was tempted to hide Sig's lil hair thingies under his hat but then was like. Why would i do that#favorite joke in all this is that Schezo tried so hard to Change that he fucked up his own speech patterns and now socializing is. well#sig didnt shave before the loops and now he has to do that every time or suffer the teasing of his friends at some point in the house#thanks guys im going insane over here and youre laughing. going nonverbal now#How does Salde balance a fish on their head? uhhhhh well you see. have you ever balanced a massive bag of frozen peas#Salde doesnt cook but there's money in that fish. Nobody feels comfortable enough to ask a kid for cash but they WILL reward good behavior#in puyos and time
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one of my kitties has baby's first vet appointment tomorrow (won't eat and threw up overnight :( ) but they've both been playing a bit! confident little lads, they are.
they're both very cuddly. I had hoped for affectionate cats, but the babies like. Straight up do not get off my lap. I've been awake for 5 hours and the whole time I've been in the room one of them has begged for lap time. I'm love them
#worried about the boy since he did vomit amd is barely eating. but he used the litter box a few times and is drinking water.#either way i'm getting him checked out because its been 24 hours and hes only nibbled on food.#but before this he was very bold. tried to follow me out of the room after being home for 15 hours maximum#both are pretty curious and only one is skittish of loud noises#and even then she comes out of hiding quickly#and straight up they both love cuddles so much.#i couldn't tell how they'd be at the shelter since one was friendly and the other quite aloof#but they both seem like they're gonna be a good fit#i'm excited for them to have the run of the place. even though there are some things i need to find more secure homes for before then#but! yeah i was expecting them to want a lot of space and straight up. i want more space than they do.#they've been very demanding of affection and i am all too happy to give it to them when they ask#sorry for so many updates. i'm having a hard time telling how i'm feeling bc i'm quite anxious#but also. they are very sweet and i feel like one of them picked me at the shelter#i'm happy#they both already come up on the bed to curl up with me when i'm sleeping#(or trying to. i'm a light sleeper and they do wake me often. but they cuddle with me on the bed pretty aggressively)#getting used to the personalities is gonna be a learning curve bc i know they're gonna be different than my mom's cat#both are very quiet. mom's cat Hollers All The Time#but they purr like nobody's business. like constantly.#i think i love them already. augh
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transmascs stop pretending that transfems are untrustworthy sources for transfeminism challenge impos- fuck i didn't even finish and you already complained about our terminology
#i really hate the expectation to know theory in these shit communities#they're barely communities it feels like on here trans people are unified by strict categorization#constantly infinitely expanding definitions but treating them as immutable and emergent from the core of reality#rather that words used to describe things we experience or the positions we are placed in my transphobic society#we're unified by who is mean to us more than wether or not we actually like each other#and so we must always be ready to litigate our position in these spaces#because they must be Definitionally justified rather than just having a real community where we're treated like human beings#i wish we still had our elders... i wish we weren't so adverse to learning humanly#i wish i could escape the weird black and white fandom thinking but it worms it's way into every community here now#this is why i keep lamenting old t4t spaces#we weren't there to argue theory#we weren't opposed to learning it in fact it was useful and joyful to share with each other#to help describe our experiences and understand where we've been placed in the world#but that's not why we were there#we were there for community to be kind to each other#now it's nothing but a bunch of teenage fandom tme people arguing with fake versions of trans women they invented in their heads#while we just hide in the background wondering if the word community means something different now#or if we're really just so evil to our very cores that we were foolish to think we could have community in the first place#sorry just#needed to vent this shit has been in my head for a while#i wasn't in a place to go to gay bars or trans events when i was first here#i couldn't have local community so finding one here with transfems who loved each other#it was so important to me#and learning that i could cater to that small but kind audience in my sex work is what made me finally love doing it#before then i'd been doing it purely cuz i couldn't get any other job#and before that because i was forced to#there's a lot of trauma wrapped up in my work for me but i healed from it largely because of my sisters i found on here#but i don't know when it went away but it did#and now it feels like we're left in a massive crowd of screaming voices#and i don't recognize any of them anymore
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there r fics that make u insane (so amazingly good it’s removed ur sanity) and then there’s fics that make u insane (you need to fistfight the author for how they did a specific thing that caused u to rant for hours)
#i know i just posted that other thing but ffs that is NOT how u handle someone in that situation everyone involved made everything 10x worse#yet it’s being treated like the right thing to do (which again ofc they’re cops they don’t understand harm reduction but still) like#seriously everything’s so forceful like u seriously think forcing ur friend to talk to u or forcing a patient to talk to a therapist under#the threat of being admitted to a psychiatric hospital is gonna make her feel comfortable talking to u? or anyone? she’s just gonna trust u#less and get better at hiding it and speaking of which the taking away all sharp objects thing makes sense in theory but like think abt it#for a minute she confirmed she isn’t suicidal and this is her only way of coping so do not just forcibly take away all her coping mechanism#like yes she is hurting herself but it’s a COPING MECHANISM. she’s coping with something. help her with that don’t just take away her penci#sharpers or whatever (which btw since she’s an adult she could easily buy more stuff and yk learn to hide it better) which again has to be#voluntary it isn’t gonna work if u force someone to do smthn they don’t want to like as ur friend u could’ve made it clear u care abt her#and wouldn’t judge her for anything and r here if she wants to talk don’t just say “you have to talk to me” and casually threaten#hospitalisation when she isn’t ready in the moment like seriously if this wasn’t a badly written fanfic she would completely stop trusting#bcz given that this wasn’t even done out of panic i would like ffs u are NOT doing any of this right#oops sorry ranted abt the bad fic in my tags-#it’s not where the author’ll see it and know it’s about them i don’t feel bad abt it#this was my first time even looking at stuff for this fandom so#cw self harm in tags#idk if i need to tag anything else for that 😭#fanfic#ao3#ryan shut the fuck up
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I know that, especially if it’s strangers, safety is also a big part of the concern, but I feel like a lot of (cis) women would be more comfortable sleeping in mixed gender rooms/rooms potentially with a bunch of cis guys if there was the requirement that you gotta promise to be cool about periods.
#thinking abt how when we went to Essen we booked a bunch of hostel rooms#and the way it worked out I was staying w/ 3 guys (in a 6 bed room) w/ I was totally fine w/#(all cis to my knowledge—and this is a fairly queer/trans club so ppl tbf to be more open)#which I’ll be honest earlier I had thought I’d try to get a room w/ more women but I actually didn’t rlly care#and of course the fact that I trusted most ppl in that club and those guys overall#(tbf one of them I just trusted in so far as he seemed fine but the other one’s I actively knew and trusted and given it’s the same room#that’s definitely enough)#but I wonder if I would’ve been less comfortable if I were on my period#like they wouldn’t be dicks abt it#but I think I would still feel that awkwardness/duty to hide it#and that’s why I think it’s specifically important that it’s like an affirmative agreement to be cool#bcs like yeah maybe if I mentioned having a period they would like try to be cool abt it but they wouldn’t expect it#but if it’s like affirmatively agreed to that they understand the risks and that they expect to hear abt periods/other stuff#maybe cis women would feel more comfortable#(Idk abt non-cis ppl who have periods bcs I can’t speak for how that would affect things)#(also I think this is mostly a problem for cis guys bcs a.obvs men (&nbs) who have/have had periods know what it’s like#&b. I feel like if you’re trans (or gnc but cis to some extent too) you learn to be cool w/shit#or at least just there’s not that societal expectation that you need to be kept from the knowledge of periods)#(also obvs anyone who uses women’s public restrooms is gonna get used to periods whether they have ‘em or not lol)
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Tim Disney exploring my virtual paintings at the AR House gallery show last November. (I never posted these because it didn’t feel real !)
#picture journal#i keep not talking about my life because it’s all so…. god i don’t even have the words#surreal. unbelievable. wild. generally incomprehensible#and most of the time i’m too busy to think#but with my hand fucked rn i have the time to realize…. ‘huh. that really happened didn’t it.’#often i feel like my life is happening to someone else#because everything just happened so fast and so much of it is absurd#but i’m still just….. me#like i spent most of this exhibition hiding in a back room#then came out did a live performance spoke on a panel shook a lot of hands and hid again#that’s what my life has been for a year now basically#and…… that’s okay#i just need to learn to take care of myself more during the hiding i think
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finally getting a chance to work on chapter 15 today :-)
#shout out AS ALWAYS to people leaving comments!!!! you are keeping me motivated you are keeping the dream alive#for some behind the scenes: in the last few weeks i've been barely sleeping and it makes it very hard to write or even be in a good mood#i usually need 11+ hours to function and so like. 2-3 hours a night is putting me in a bad place both mentally and physically#and yes i realize 11 or more hours is like a silly amount of sleep but idk. it's just how i am. i go to bed early AND sleep in ahaha.#i've been falling behind in all my classes due to the sleep thing so writing for fun has totally been off the table lol#ANYWAYS#typing typing typing (this chapter will be a lighthearted one)#we all need some fluff and levity i think (and i need to give time for Riku to care for Sora even more and be like. wow. i love you)#I was struggling earlier bc i wanted to write both about how Sora has been hiding darkness from loved ones and needs to let them in#but also with the idea of sora feeling that he needs friends to have strength or value. and i kind of realized i needed to pick one#like maybe a better writer than me could have both of those things be addressed at once but for me i was like... I want Riku to comfort him#which goes against him learning that he's fine on his own. we can address that in a different fic. rn he is just sad and needs to know#that he can share that with the people around him. and that he's still loveable despite it all#also shout out to my gf for teaching me “love isn't something you deserve that's not what love is” like. i did not know that b4 her#so I asked her lots of questions for chapter 14 actually cause I was like. i want Riku to support Sora in the way you'd support me#cuz IDK SHIT ABOUT THAT i have always felt unworthy of love and like i had to beg people to stay with me until i got into this relationship#so i was like. judy. what is your wisdom. how do you care for me when i feel like my pain makes me unloveable. what would you say#So yeah shout out to her! I am off on a tangent now hehe sorry. thanks for reading if you read this at all!! have a good day :)#jtsys fic#updates
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i posted a photo on my instagram where i’m not wearing makeup for the first time, and that might not be a big deal for some people but it’s a big deal for me
#with my skin issues i always feel the need to cover my skin with like a skin tint or whatever and i can’t take photos unless i’m wearing +#something that’ll cover my skin yk#but recently i’ve been trying to appreciate and show my skin some love for what it is without makeup#and learn to be more comfortable shaping my bare face and not hiding all the time#showing*#i think it’s definitely a process and some days are better than others but i’m determined to try#i love wearing makeup though and i probably will never stop lol#but outside of that i wanna appreciate my skin both with and without it#i also find that the more i love and appreciate my skin the more it shows in my appearance#j.txt
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imagine if someone said this shit about any other group of human beings lol some people are this website are actually sociopathic. of course parents should stop their kids from doing this but why the fuck are you blaming the kid for their natural curiosity? most people tried doing this as children
#i did this and im definitely not a fucking rapist. why the fuck would you say this#kids are the most vulnerable group in society. stop talking about them like this#if you don't enjoy children's company that's fine but there's no excuse to speak of them so cruelly#they're little people with undeveloped brains still trying to figure out how the world works#imagine if someone said this about a highly disabled person who has the impulse control of a child lol all hell would break loose#but somehow it's okay to say about an actual child. wtf#i still remember being so hurt as a kid by people who didn't hide their disdain for children#and child hate seems to be getting even more common now. i don't want my son experiencing this shame inducing shit#i make sure he's well behaved and doesn't bother people but sometimes he tries to do stuff that's natural for a kid#and he shouldn't be made to feel like theirs something wrong with him when he's still learning#*there's#treating kids like this when what they need is guidance and gentle discipline to teach them the ways of the world#is what creates fearful and shame filled adults#again there's nothing wrong with not wanting kids or not enjoying their company but blatant hate is fucked up#children are just as human as any other vulnerable group#i really hope this person is just a 15 year old edgelord. i see way too many adults like this tho#especially on reddit lmao that website is such a cesspool
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[image ID: a screenshot of a discord chat with username “wenge (when-gay)’ carrying out a one-sided conversation expressing her reluctance and fears regarding driving at 1:08 a.m. the other person in the conversation’s responses are not shown]
#when your boy politely suggests you move to the next difficulty level in driving#we were both speaking but i was typing my answers because i dont have my voice right now#i think in order he said 'you need to learn to drive faster' & when i asked how fast he said first 25 (wont kill me) then 40 (will kill me)#he then said we move from 40 to 65 to which i hit him with 50 50 50 what happened to 50#the keysmash happened when he told me to drive to his house#in other words you can see the moment my brain short circuited#i normally feel bad sharing text conversations but i dont feel bad here because its only my responses#the only one being blasted is myself for being a cant drive gay#i get that there arent many 30 zones but 25 to 40 is a lot okay#i went on a 40 road exactly once and it ended quite terribly. scared the driving instructor#why do highways have to exist why do highways have to be 60+ zones why me just why#i said merging because i thought that would be the next difficult skills to tackle and he was like um no#and hit me with the 'you need to learn to make turns at more than 2mph before you worry about merging lanes neo'#25 to 40 is a lot and im not even on 25s yet i am still in 10mph zones. i have to graduate up to 25 still#we started on 25s and he was like hmmmmmmmm maybe i over estimated you lets go to the 10s#like a disappointed teacher discovering the kid who bragged about ice skating actually cant ice skate at all#i cant drive i cant dance i dont know karate.... face it... im never gonna make it#neo rants#photo post#i know i need to drive and not hide behind mcr references but i just really dont like driving#i will get there slowly but surely but that doesnt mean i cant whine and cry about it on the way there#like sailor moon intended#also i took 3d6 psychic damage because after all the fighting about the plans for the car he suggested my own original idea to me#my idea was to leave the car with my mom and now hes presenting this idea the very first idea i suggested as if he came up with it#i cant live in this society
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day one million and one of the struggle of whether to come out to my parents or not
#u can tell the therapy is working bc i've been trying (w mixed results) to float opportunities to have more vulnerable conversations w them#i'm proud of myself for that#up until recently i don't think i could have faced the idea that my feelings are worth bringing up unprompted#even when it's positive things like 'this meant a lot to me' or 'i'm happy to see you'#there has always been this internal pressure to hide and keep my emotional distance and be only and exactly what i'm supposed to be...#but back on topic: the creating openings and taking initiative thing has also been difficult bc it leaves me open to disappointment#i know you can't force ppl to meet you or even (intimately familiar w this one) understand what you're trying to say#and i hated it when my sister's response to this failure to react was to try to manipulate a 'correct' response out of them#so i don't wanna find myself doing that#but if i'm not gonna do that then i have to admit that (1) i didn't get what i want and (2) maybe can't or won't#and while that's not New per se (i have been resigned to not getting what i want emotionally for most of my life)#it still stings and it feels kind of raw bc i am new to acknowledging validating and/or even feeling my feelings#if there is one thing i have been learning from therapy it is that it is okay if it takes time or if something doesn't work#and that sometimes it takes others time too so even if everything isn't hugging and crying in the moment it doesn't necessarily mean#that nothing got through#so i'm not ready to give up yet or refuse to try something different#it's just that i feel i need to get some hint that they'll give me something back other than 'ok' and change the subject b4 i try coming out#i am more and more convinced that it's something i want to do; because keeping this from them makes me so sad#accepting that i am queer and opening myself up to being honest about that has allowed me to be so much happier#but it's a happiness i can't share with them. and it feels like such a loss that i can't let them see me happy#even so all the same i feel like i have to try to reach out to them and make them hear that i love them before i can do that#because it would break my fucking heart if it made them treat me like a stranger#i sometimes still don't feel like they treat me like their kid so much as a cordial acquaintance or a colleague#but those moments of love really mean the world to me and i feel like i have to find a way to fill myself up on it in case i lose it#on some level i know it can't all be gooey emotion and there's no way around having to feel some feelings alone#but that little taste of connection... the night of T's wedding... i know it CAN happen and it makes it so hard to keep reaching and missing
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Oh and I'm getting okay with not being very respectable. So I don't have to think about hiding parts of myself that I'm embarrassed of anymore
#talk#to list some of those less respectable traits#im not a proactive person#there are many things that i ought to do. for me or for the people in my life. that i dont do#things that would make me more learned or more courageous or just more okay. and things that the people in my life deserve#and this is embarrassing to say out loud and identify but frankly i am wired to be a centrist. i havent much backbone#thats not to say i align with centrism politically. just to say that - if i didnt surround myself with left leaning folks#and left leaning ideas and news and etc - i would not really be acquiring much information or doing much for radical progress#like i recognize this as bad、at least regarding my own personal belief in what ought to be done for the world#far left or at least left leaning ppl are friends to me. theyre who i want to surround myself with#but i just dont think im up to par for what the left needs#Besides That. im not very curious. i dont look for many new things#i dont know if i have adhd or whatever. but if i dont. which - its 50/50 at this point - i really am just lazy i think#and thats a shame#people have it harder than me and they make something of their lives#but i just don't. because i think that i just might have a shallow sense of life when it comes to activity#blah blah blah#by the way i AM embarrassed about all of this. im just letting myself feel it now. instead of hiding it#admittedly i do dampen the blow of the embarrassment by numbing my feelings about it
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Vent
#my friends always start fighting when theyre drunk.#like theyre the sweetest couple and would never break up and theyre getting married once they have the funds but#as soon as theyve gone down a bottle of vodka and its starting to get late they both get emotional and snappy#always start arguing#its so tiring#like i know i shouldnt drink with them anyway#they're alcoholics and i shouldnt drink with them because like. they shouldnt drink at all. and me joining them is giving them an incentive#but i cant tell them what to do either#and i dont wanna be like “no you cant have alcohol in my house thats not allowed” like some youth pastor#now they came into my room to ask if they could drink my alcohol since theirs ran out and i feel so gross#i dont want to fuel this behavior#its gotten worse i think#i should say no next time they ask to drink#theyre amazing and my best friends and have been the only people ive hung out with during my intense remote learning uni courses#but its so gross to feel like im endorsing this behavior when i join them and when they get like this#i dont know how to handle it and theyre obviously ashamed of their actions because they have to ask me to let them drink my alcohol as well#but theyre. idk. i dont wanna be an annoying savior complex esque “get sober” person either#i literally felt the need to hide the leftover alcohol and it proved to be needed since they came asking for it#its a bad time all around. i dont know how to handle this.#same with their fighting. they argue and end up hurting eachother and then immediately talk it out then hurt again then quiet then talk#its just a neverending ouroboros of fighting and making up#and its making everyone else uncomfortable and that fuels one of them to get even more heated#its so frustrating to endure as a bystander because they dont think theyre fighting#its a hassle. all this is a hassle. going away for uni is going to be interesting. i want a blunt#get them high instead of drunk and they wouldnt fight. or try to get more from someone else. maybe.#tried to hint that they should sleep but theyre staying up longer. im going to bed. getting to separate myself from the emotional storm#the borderline in them is probably blown out of proportion when drunk.#eugh#I dont like this
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