#i LOVE when a show so meticulously puts a character in a situation where he HAS to make choices

[yannig]

And this right here is the first proof we have that Huaien is lying to Xiaobao.

Of course, he's lying on his background as a bodyguard, but that's different from lying to Xiaobao's face - it's a general cover that the Jin's men discovered through investigation. It's not directly relevant to their relationship.

But the rest of it? I'm expecting most if not all of the stories about his family to be truthful - as well as his disbelief in love. Sure, he's hiding a lot, but most of what he's revealed to Xiaobao was likely true.

It doesn't, however, mean that it was genuine. I was asking last week if Huaien's vulnerability was genuine or a calculated way to manipulate Xiaobao. I'm of the opinion it's going too quickly to be entirely genuine - Huaien doesn't strike me as the type to make love declarations that early.

This lie proves that it is at least part of said vulnerability is manipulative. He pretends to have sacrificed a great deal to save Xiaobao when in reality his mission was perfectly fulfilled. Of course the document he gave whoever this asshole is was a decoy; Huaien isn't stupid.

But he nods when Xiaobao asks if he gave their attacker what he wanted, lying to cement the idea that he's falling in love with Xiaobao and that he's ready to risk his father's anger for him. It's the first clear confirmation we have that he's purposefully manipulating Xiaobao.

Of course, it comes to bite him in the ass instantly when his father's next order it to kill the Jin family, which actually puts him in a situation where he has to chose between his father and Xiaobao.

Up to that point, he could tell himself that every time he was allowing Xiaobao close, it was for the good of the mission. That he was seducing him to use him to get the accounting book. That he was being vulnerable and open to manipulate Xiaobao and not because he was enjoying his attention, his care, his warmth. That he was protecting him to endear Xiaobao to him and not because he cares about him. That he was being possessive because the seduction plan will work better is Xiaobao's attention is focused solely on him.

Now though? Now he's going to have to make a choice.

Does he follow his father's orders in hope that he will actually give him his freedom, but lose Xiaobao's warmth?

Does he try to pretend he followed his orders while hiding Xiaobao somewhere?

Or worse, does he fully disobey his father and try to save the whole family, because Xiaobao has both shown and stated that he'll be sad if his family dies?

[leverage-ot3]

thinking about how certain characters on the leverage team have been in mortal peril and why it was one person vs another and what that means

nate has been shot, like, multiple times. he’s the leader, the planner, the mastermind. he may not be the hitter but he takes risks that might not always pay off or be in best fortune for him, and he knowingly does that anyway. not much regard for his life sometimes to be completely honest. he’s also easily the most volatile (lesser as the seasons go on but still) and most likely to make a rash decision (season four season finale I’m looking directly at you)

I’m not going to talk about eliot too much because he experiences a lot of pain, but, also, it’s almost always pain that he can endure. he is the hitter- he’s the one that is supposed to take the brunt of the pain, the one prepared to get injured for the sake of the con and the safety of the team. he knows exactly what he is getting into when he throws himself into the situation. knows the risks, the damage he’s putting himself in for

hardison is frankly the biggest example of someone who is put into grave danger (ha). I’m thinking about possibly being murdered in the experimental job, buried alive in the grave danger job, drowning in the pool in the big bang job, etc. he’s not a hitter, doesn’t have the maneuverability or stealth of a thief. he can talk himself out of situations (within reason) but that can only go so far. and he’s not nate, making plans before they act. there’s lowkey a reason why he’s in the van besides the fact that his job necessitates it. barring sophie, he’s probably the least equipped/experienced to deal with real danger, real violence

on the other hand, sophie almost never gets hurt. sure, a gun may get pointed at her, but she can surely talk her way out (‘it’s not loaded’ ‘it was’ ‘not to a grifter’). I honestly can’t remember a time that sophie was ever seriously injured??? she is so meticulous about setting herself up in situations that will specifically not get her hurt, or where she has some sort of safety net or backup plan. I’m thinking about the quote where she says she gets people to unlock doors for her vs having to pick the lock herself

parker is somewhere in the middle of the spectrum but leans more towards sophie. she’s been in some scrapes and close calls (the inside job, the hot potato job with the burn room, the long way down job). but in nearly every situation like this she finds herself in, she can also work herself out of. she can run fast enough and climb and crawl far enough, dodge lasers well enough that she can manuver herself out of the problem. the few times she was ever in real danger was when she put herself there (I’m specifically thinking about the stork job when she puts herself between children and people with guns) (albeit fake guns)

some underdeveloped thought in the back of my mind is turning around the idea of importance to the show/team’s core and the likelihood of getting hurt

(talking eliot out of the equation so as not to skew the data, hardison is hurt the most because he is the heart of the group. nate is hurt so much because he is the leader. sophie and parker are undoubtedly still important, but have the skills to maneuver out of those situations before they spiral out of control)

(although the act of taking eliot out of the equation says something in of itself. something about the only person capable of taking that amount of pain for those he loves, etc, etc)

[stackslip]

Just wanted to say I love your fma 2003 posts. While I do think the original story is more cohesive and stuff, I think that the stuff they did with the 03 show is really interesting and provides a lot of cool angles on the character. It's a completely different story after a certain point with its own merit, and I think that it gives a lot of development to the characters in fascinating ways. I feel like seeing it added depth to my appreciation of the story. There's juicy bits in there that I wish were in the original and I'm just glad they were explored and that I'm not the only one who loves it. :))

sorry i took so late to respond lol

i think the og IS a lot more cohesive and planned out, and more consistent in quality! it's just that i don't think it's much to write home about either. it's a very solid fun shounen and as long as you don't think too deep about its implications, it's definitely a lot better written than 90% of mainstream shounen. and i can see the appeal in that, i genuinely do. i don't think 03 is to everyone's taste, even outside of people for whom og fma is comfort food, for whom even a slight deviation feels Wrong because that's their emotional support anime or whatever. like, i'm a fucking dbz fan always and forever you know? i don't have room to say "why do people enjoy mangahood better, it's so much less mature than 03" bc i still get pumped and emo from super saiyan transformations. i do wish these fans at least would understand WHY one might have frustrations with the themes of the story and what it does with very serious subjects lol

i do think that 03 is its own story but i don't think it's its own story "from a certain point". yes the early anime follows a lot of the manga's story, albeit rearranging it differently. but i'd argue that it's different in essence from the very start. its tone it starkly different from the manga, which is and remains a Cool Mystery Action Shounen. fma 03 from its very first episode leans more into brooding and psychological horror territory, even outside of the extra gore. even the subtle changes it makes early in the story aren't just to change/"improve" or adapt the manga's story, but to set up what they do when 03 REALLY departs from the manga's storyline. ed and al's characters are, i'd argue, leagues away from their og counterparts by ep 10--the flashback and making them go through all that trauma at age 12 really sets up that 15 year old ed isn't a confident shitlord like he is in the og, but a deeply insecure and guilt ridden teenager forced to grow up too fast and hiding his insecurities behind a mask of confidence. al is still kind and polite, but also a lot more ruthless and even more dependent on his brother than the og one is--the sensory deprivation and dysmorphia from the armour is cutting him off from other humans than his brother, and a lot of his own doubts and anguish at his situation begin eating at him to the point that when barry throws out the "you're an artificial person" accusation, al's brain immediately latches onto it because he's been wondering if he's even human for years.

i do think 03 has pits and valleys in terms of quality--but honestly i'm fine with it (bar a few genuinely infuriating decisions such as the transmisogynist serial killer trope in ep 8), it's a 2000s anime that was insanely ambitious and butting against the author and funding, some episodes visibly have a shoestring budget and while it remains thematically consistent you can very clearly see moments/places where the production committe threw in "hey uhhhhhh put in more kimblee he's popular" or "we're not giving you more episodes sorry. wrap it all up in three". do i wish a more consistent version of the show existed, meticulously planned out and with all the time and money in the world they needed existed? yes. would that version have been perfect? not necessarily tbh!

but really, 03 has a number of strong decisions and genuinely genius twists on the og that make it very hard for me to come back to the fma manga without feeling deeply underwhelmed. i like greedling so, so much--i just don't like him enough to not feel really bitter about how lust is treated in the manga. i genuinely love the scene where ed swears he'll get al's body's back at the gate, 10/10 shounen scene--but also, there's the scene ed happily tells al that after digging up their mom's body it turns out the transmutation they did had nothing to do with their mom, and every time i'm like "this is so stupid and i wish they'd kept the failed transmutation homonculi". the absolute heights of fma as a manga never ever manage to hit nearly as strongly to me as 03's does, because og fma will always feel just..... lacking in ambition and in depth, where imo in some aspects fma 03 still hasn't been outdone. where can i find something like the 03's homonculi? how many narratives are there that celebrate a character like scar instead of playing the trope of the Well Meaning Extremist Who Kicks A Puppy? this is a real question btw send them to me immediately i need them.

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

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1. Hello, I was hoping that you lovely people can help me find an ao3 fic that I’ve been searching for. WWX is brought back the same way as canon but it wasn’t MXY who summoned him but an original character. WWX ends up in Cloud Recesses because he interacts with LXC AND LWJ a lot in the story. The twist is that the person who brought WWX back hated him so much that he wanted WWX to suffer really badly. WWX figures it out/knows. It does end up with a happy ending. Thank you!~

Hello, beautiful people. Im the anon who submitted #1 from the latest fic finder post. Unfortunately the fic I’m looking for is not Beauty and the Boot. The original character who summoned WWX was male and hated the Yiling Patriarch. The fic had a lot of angst as well if that helps🥲

NOT FOUND! ❤️Beauty and the Boot by PTchan (T, 44k, wangxian, summoned by f!oc, Canon Divergence, Romantic Comedy, Genderbending, Denial, Fem!WWX, WangXian kids, Crack-ish, WIP)

FOUND! A Storm of Laughter in the Stillness of the Jingshi by OnlyMeAndMyBones (T, 73k, WangXian, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Recovery, Pain, Mental Illness, Depression, PTSD, Rehabilitation, slow burn but significantly less so than canon, miscommunication is still a thing tho, Empathy, Guilt, Forgiveness, it's not THAT dark actually)

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2. Hey. I've been looking for a fic that I read I while ago for so long. WWX accidentally sets off a talisman and gets deaged.? I remember that he is stuck in that form for a while and takes zidian from JC. Later when he finds out about LWJs scars on his back he threatens the lan elders with it and says something like this isn't even hia weapon and imagine if he dad one of his own.. thanks bye 

FOUND? Silver & Gold by beeswaxing  (E, 162k, wangxian, Mojo’s post)

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3. Hi! I'm trying to find a wangxian fanfic I read long ago. It's where LWJ is engaged to JYL and WWX is engaged to JZX. I remember a specific part where JZX got jealous when he saw WWX and LWJ hanging out a lot and told WWX that he is his and not LWJs. WWX took offense to this and punched JZX telling him he cant control him. Endgame is ofc wangxian but yeah. I cant find it 😭 @journalsofagoddess

FOUND? Neatly Arranged by thunderwear (T, 45k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Angst with a Happy Ending, lwj’s mother is here but only briefly, RIP, Shenanigans, Fix-It, of sorts, Canonical Character Death, but not all, did i forget to tag pining, because this fic is like 90 percent pining, Hurt/Comfort)

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4. Hello! Thank you for your hard work! I'm trying to find a fic there LWJ is a youtuber, and he does these 'day in the life of a college student' where he's just perfect at everything- meticulous, on top of his life and studies, and ultra competent. WWX, at the same college, then posts a response video where he shows what's it really like as a student and its just a troll/spoof of LWJ's vids where he cries like three times a day and eats junk food, etc. This goes on for months, with many videos and WWX accidentally becomes popular. Then wangxian meet and fall in love about it. NHS and JC help WWX with the vids, and i think the summary said something like 'three idiots make a youtube channel'. Anyway, hope someone can put together better search parameters than me. Thank you! @somevariationofgay

FOUND! like, comment, share & subscribe by detectorist (T, 22k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, YouTube, Social Media, Flirting, Humour, Banter, Getting Together, First Kiss, Texting, so much texting, Youtubers For Social Justice, The Gang Gets Political, Competitive Flirting Via The Medium Of Youtube, it's about the yearning, YouTube Rivals To Lovers)

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5. Hi! I recently found this page and it looks amazing. I’ve been looking for the AO3 au fic. The premise is that in this world, people are able to essentially enter their minds kind of like a vr situation and create worlds. This has become a very lucrative business. Wei ying entered a simulation that was MDZS and as a result he entered a 13 month coma. Everyone thought he was dead. But he retired from the business. But then the juniors call him in for “one last mission” which is basically the yi city arc. and he and lan zhan work through some unspoken tension and then they get together. @awkwardly-cry-ing-in-the-corner

FOUND! some lovely, perilous thing by varnes (E, 24k, WangXian, Inception Fusion, Criminal Associates To Lovers, Heist Case Fic)

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6. Hey, it's me again haha so I read this ff long time ago and it was soo good unfortunately i cant remember the title

So like, the cultivation world needs yiling laozu's help and they tried to summon him using mo xuanyu but they failed since yl lz appeared in his own original body and not in mxy. Anyway so history repeats itself, wwx knows everybody especially lan zhan cuz he his "friend" that time. They became curious about wwx, they found his journal and he kept talking about this certain friend eventually they found out the friend's name is lan zhan lan wangji. Time skip they found out that lwj reincarnated, he looks exactly the same as wwx's friend. Lxc said it was impossible cuz all their ancestors died because of an explosion that was caused by wwx bavk in the day.

There is this spefic scene, wwx kept blaming himself because he was the reasom why lz died, ok so lz married a woman (arranged marriage) and had child with her, wy was heartbroken and told lz that he has feelings for him, lz also has feelings for him, so when lz heard that the sects will have a siege in burial mounds he went there and protected wy then something happened and the surroundings explode.

Anyway, they have come to a conclusion that wy is an immortal, he took care of lz's child, lz reincarnated he fought really hard to keep his body and appearance the same

Thank you thank youuuuuuuu for all your hard work @hellothere9597

FOUND? Old Foreshadows by protos_metazu_ison (M, 15k, WangXian, YL WWX, BAMF WWX, War, Universe Alteration, Sunshot Campaign, Rated For Violence, Timeline What Timeline)

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7. Hi hi, I hope y'all are doing well ^^ Ive recently been thinking about a fic i read in late 2019/early 2020 and I was hoping to get some help finding it? What I remember about it is that after Mo Manor, wwx doesnt go to Dafan mountain and instead travels until he finds a village and starts working there as a farmer. wn is also there after a while and he helps wwx. lwj visits the village but doesnt recognize wwx at first. If anyone knows what fic this is id be vv grateful! @storming-raumo

FOUND? focal, filler, and line by bosbie (T, 26k, wangxian, canon divergence, flower shop au, fluff, hurt/comfort, pining, falling in love, WWX is not recognized in Dafan mountain, slice of life, WIP) wwx is not a farmer but the rest checks out

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8. Fic finder! I binged All Of The Yiling Wei Sect AUs recently and they all kind of blurred together in my brain, so I THINK all of this happens in the same fic but I could be wrong and if I am I'm so, so sorry. In the fic Wei Wuxian very briefly worked with the talisman scammer to sell actual Yiling Laozu talismans for a decent penny, then one of the Wen uncles convinced him they should set up their own stall. They made talisman paper out of the burial mounds bamboo and it was red. There was a scene when the Wen went on trial and Wen Ning was able to speak to the people in the room, proving that he's cognizant and not a mindless puppet. The Jiang ended up taking the Wei as a subordinate sect I believe? And WWX started to make friends with Jin Guangyao. @lewiscarrolatemybrain

FOUND! Grave dirt by esama (T, 92k, wangxian, canon divergence, necromancy, demonic cultivation, farming, found family, pre-slash, politics, Fix-it of sorts, yilingwei sect au)

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9. I am looking for a fic, maybe it is part of the Amnesia rec list, or if not it should be! Wwx has lost about 2 months of memory. Turns out that in that time he and LZ got engaged. He tries to work out if this is a real engagement or not. There is also a discussion conference at CR and Jiang Cheng is there. I particularly remember the scene where Wwx finds out the engagement wasn't real, goes to JC and cries about it. Then JC storms to the Jingshi to shout at LZ for making WY cry. I love that scene, but who wrote it again? Thanks for helping me out! @kesterling

FOUND! put your heart where your mouth is by protos_metazu_ison (T, 20k, wangxian, JC & WWX, post-canon, misunderstanding, memory loss, pining & insecure WWX, happy ending, twin prides of yunmeng feels, fluff & angst, protective JC)

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10. Hi, I'm looking for a fic where the sword goes through both JYL and JC at Nightless City. WWX takes them both back to Lotus Pier and essentially locks the place behind a barrier, but the sect itself doesn't really mind. I think it was one chapter in a collection but I can't be sure.

FOUND? Chapter 2 of Cosmic by apathyinreverie (T, 10k, wangxian, JC & WWX & JYL, everyone lives au, yunmeng sibling dynamics, protective yunmeng Jiang sect, romance, smitten LWJ, oblivious WWX, powerful WWX, possessive LWJ, soft WWX, streetkid WWX, time travel fix-it, modern setting)

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11. Hi! Love the work you all do. Keep the good work. So for a fic finder... I've been looking for this fic I started reading a while ago but then had to stop. I'm pretty sure I bookmarked it but alas I haven't had any luck finding it. That's why I'm putting my faith in you guys and the readers. So this is what I remember: it was a WIP, it was post canon, wangxian, JC and JL are in CR, JC want a fight, WWX said a few truth and JL goes to WWX, it is said that JYL went to the battle to die on purpose. @multitudeofmes

FOUND! What Happens When The Self-Sacrifing Idiot Snaps by WiFi_Stalker (Not rated, 1k, wangxian, post-canon, not Jiang friendly, not YZY friendly, not JC friendly, not JYL friendly, WWX snaps, WIP)

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12. I'm looking for a fic from 1-2 years ago, in English, was a WIP, where LWJ is Chief Cultivator and WWX is wandering on his own. WWX meets a nobleman who invites WWX to stay with him and encourages him to use his cultivation, to the benefit of the common people. The fic was from LWJ's perspective (I think?) and mostly took place in letters exchanged, with some exposition before or after a letter. Wangxian implied, not confirmed; fic author debating confirmation. Does the fic still exist? @acasualgeek

FOUND? To Start A Bridge From A Single Log by ChilianXianzi (T, 4k, wangxian, WWX & OMC, post-canon, chief cultivator LWJ, inventor WWX, politics, epistolary, pining, jealous LWJ, sugar baby WWX, WIP)

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13. Hi! I need help finding this fic. It's a special agent (James bond style) Lan Wangji and Q Wei Wuxian. I tried looking everywhere and with every tag I could think of on AO3 but I could only find the one where Wei Wuxian is a 007. I remember it starts out with Lan Wangji in the car watching a house or something and then Wei Wuxian talks to him over an ear com. He had to take MianMian's place as she was busy/ on pregnancy leave? I can't remember. Also, Wei Wuxian gets shocked when he realizes Lan Wangji always brings back his kit in perfect condition. Thank you!!

FOUND? 💖 some life yet unspent by Fahye (E, 28k, wangxian, spies & secret agents au)

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14. Is the one fic, where Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji dual cultivate a Yin core in Wei Wuxian still up on AO3? Wei Wuxian, before he knows he’s going to dual cultivate with Lan Wangji, has nightmares that he’s going to have to dial cultivate with Wen Qing. Lan Wangji has to rail him five times in a night.

FOUND! i had to abandon myself (you took all of me) by justdoityoufucker (E, 27k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Novel Characterizations, Philosophy, Illnesses, Chronic Pain, Cultivation Sect Politics, Dual Cultivation, LWJ fucks a core into WWX, On Hiatus) might be this? Unfortunately it's on hiatus right now :[

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15. Hello! I don’t know if this fic is still up. I couldn’t find it so… I can remember some details of this fic, but it’s basically a shameless Lan Wangji time-travel fanfic where he changes the whole story by saving Wei Wuxian from the beginning in Cloud Recesses. I forgot the name… I remember that part of the summary was the line; “If you give me a kiss, I’ll let you go.” Or something like that…

FOUND! could be the deleted "OOC!" by A_flower_in_the_snow. It was reuploaded on Wattpad

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16. i read a fic a while ago where WWX survived the seige but lost most of his memory and ended up finding a shrine and moving in there. He stayed there with a-yuan for years taking care of the shrine. Eventually LWJ found him. thats really all i remember but if you could help me find it that would be amazing!! thank you!!! :)

FOUND? #16 was This House is Loved by Ribena but has been deleted

SIMILAR! And They Have Escaped The Weight of Darkness by cosmicmilktea (T, 10k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Amnesia, Memory Loss, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Screw the Cultivation world tbh, The Lan precepts deserves better, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, domestic life, Social justice boyfriends wangxian, Happy Ending) is a deleted fic, however this fic is similar to it (no ayuan tho)

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17. Hi first of all thank you for your womderful work i always find good fics to read because of this blog next please help me find this fic ive been serching all over. This fic is a role reversal instead of wwx its lwj who died. I remember that he died before the 33rd whip and a lan member got guilty and brought him back. His ribbon was also missing in the beginning of the story. wwx is a sec leader now yiling wei sect at wei sizhui brought lwj to get help because lwj is looking for something and he hides is face. Thank you for the help and good job @ladyxyraine

FOUND? Restart from the End by EmBlu (IcyDeath) (G, 71k, wangxian, resurrection, canon divergence, temporary major character death (LWJ), JYL & JZX & NMJ live, yilingwei sect au, sect leader WWX, angst, hurt/comfort, angry WWX, grief, slow burn, wei sizhui, WIP)

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18. i'm sure i'll find it before this is answered, but just in case, i remembered a line from a fic but i don't remember what it's called. it's something like "wwx imagined sizhui's face on a series of progressively younger children. this is what he may have looked like at 13; at 9; at 6. this is how your child grew without you." thank you!!!!! @kisskissgotohell

FOUND! your name, safe in their mouth by astrolesbian (G, 10k, LSZ & WWX & LWJ, WangXian, Father-Son Relationship, Injury, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, More aligned with CQL than novel canon, Miscommunication, Eventual Positive Communication, Trying to be a family, how to tell your dad you want him to be your dad in 6 easy steps!)

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19. Hello! Thank you so much to all of the mods for what you do! I’m hoping to find this post-canon mpreg fic that I read from a while back. WWX didn’t immediately tell LWJ about the pregnancy out of fear that it won’t push through or something. Some people were alive (like Wen Qing who secretly did WWX’s checkup and told him about the pregnancy) but not JYL. WWX also stopped drinking wine and started eating healthier to ensure the baby’s growth? Which kinda made LWJ suspicious? There was also a part where WWX visited JC in Lotus Pier, and JC was able to guess at WWX’s pregnancy and they had a really nice conversation and reconciliation. I’m sorry if some of these details might have been from other mpreg fics that I unknowingly confused with the one I’m looking for, but I hope the others are accurate enough to help! Thank you so much again! Y’all are a blessing!

FOUND? Unexpected Lullaby by SilverStark (T, 30k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Minor Original Character(s), Unplanned Pregnancy, Post-Canon, Mpreg, Non-ABO, Fluff, Established Relationship, Reconciliation, Family, Dual Cultivation Baby)

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20. I'm looking for a fanfic that the modern Wei Wuxian ends up traveling to the past because of a book he found. I also remember that it turns out that all the characters that are dead come back to life

FOUND? Could be the deleted series by yareyarejojosan. Someone uploaded the author's works to Google Drive

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[rdng1230]

Fic talk

tagged by @desert--moonchild

How many wips do you have currently? 8 ish? but I haven't worked on any of them since I started Ain't That a Kick in the Head. Most of them are one sentence ideas in a google doc but others are a little more fleshed out. One I would loooooooove to write is one where Buddie runs into the original Buddie aka Gage and Desoto from Emergency!, but I really need to be able to watch old episodes to get their voices down and the show isn't available anywhere except live tv reruns. I also have lots of Tommy + Deluca family shenanigans for the strings of fate series. There's some angstier stuff as well I hope to dive into.

Which one are you finding the hardest to finish? Why do you think that is? lol you can't struggle to finish something you haven't really started can you? tbh I'm putting everything on the back burner till the epilogues done and then we'll see how everything else goes :)

What does it usually look like when inspiration strikes for you? I'm not often far away from my laptop these days so usually I just plop down and type it straight into docs. If I'm out and about I'll jot it down in my notes app, maybe also text it to a friend if the idea was something I'd been whining to them about.

Do you curate playlists for each fic or is your process different? You know it's funny I love a good playlist and I love making them but because I can't really read or write when music is playing besides like instrumental stuff or lofi, I don't make playlists to set the vibe. However, I am meticulous about the music actually in the story, so I will make playlists to keep track of what music is referenced and also to give my readers an opportunity to know what the characters are listening to in those moments. I will agonize over what a character might listen to and under what circumstance. Sal's picks come to me almost immediately, he follows his heart and likes big earnest 80's gated reverb atmospheric kinda stuff. Tommy is more difficult, he's moodier, a lot more mercurial about what he listens to based on what he's feeling, he can be a tough nut to crack. The hardest part is when there's a song that is PERFECT for their situation but I know they wouldn't listen to/know about, see: A Home by the Chicks for Tommy chapter 5.

Do you go balls to the wall and write as you go or are you more organised? It is soooooo situation specific. Sometimes I sit down and just crank out a whole thing right then and there like my Young Royals Fic from a few months ago. I'm still really new to this whole thing tbh, I'm still trying to figure out what works for me. But for the longer stuff I usually know what I want out of each chapter and then when I get closer to it I write out a scene list for how that happens, sometimes what I want requires breaking things up into two chapters. chapter 6 was fun because it actually had entire conversations written before the scene list so I had a page of dialogue and had to backpedal and structure the chapter scenes around that conversation. the epilogue is literally fully written scenes followed by 5 word placeholders for next scenes, and dry templated out set up scenes, and then random lines of dialogue from the final scene, idk man its the Wild West out here. For my strings of fate series I'm keeping things vague on purpose in terms of timelines and certain details to allow for this universe to account for future ideas I may have.

np tags, I'm sure many of you have done these already and if you have just tag me I'd love to read 'em: @racerchix21 @ohlookitsthearkhamknight @cliophilyra and whoever else wants to!

[corvidcrossbow]

hihi ! i just read your intruders fic and it was so good, do you have any tips on how to write Daryl properly?

Hiii!!! For one, thank you 😭🫶🫶 You're so sweet (this is a little lengthy, the nerd got out)

As for writing Daryl; one of my favoritest things is media analysis, especially in regards to the structuring and development of characters: so when watching shows/movies/etc., I try to pay a lot of attention to major and minor details in the plot and a character's mannerism, actions, dialogue, etc. since I not only find it fun, but I think it really helps in giving and understanding the depth of characters writing (yes there's a lot of reading into things too much & overanalyzing, but in this house we assume everything happened for a reason and was meticulously planned ‼️) (except for when we ignore canon because sometimes writers don't know what they're doing) (*cough*, Leah)

It's pretty straightforward; it helps in learning how a character behaves, reacts and would handle certain situations (since you're essentially studying how they do it). I generally get to a point where I know a character well enough that I can see something and just be like "oh yeah they would/wouldn't like that" or "*this* is how they'd do that" (still I am guilty of indecisiveness in headcanons 😔🤞)

But beside all that, turning to other people's interpretations is also really helpful! Norman Reedus himself is obviously a good resource; listening to and reading the extra things he's said about Daryl in interviews and stuff (and what other cast/crew say too) Then of course other fan content (fanfics and headcanons are a key ones. I also end up on old reddit comment threads pretty often with people discussing episodes) I'm on his Fandom page all the time (occasionally the Survival Instinct/Onslaught specific one too, but take that one with a bigger grain of salt cause there's always gonna be inconsistencies)

I also used to be a really big role player so pretending to embody Daryl or put yourself in his shoes might also be useful(?) (I think I do this subconsciously 🗿), and I find Daryl to be very relatable so that inherently aids

I think Daryl in particular can be a more challenging character to feel like you've written "properly" (in a way that feels in character) because of how complex certain parts of his personality are (like most characters or people with years worth of trauma), and the way he handles things is very dependent on his relationship to the those involved, what it is, what period of his life it's in (like how he's much harsher and hot-headed in the early seasons, but shuts down a lot in mid seasons, but towards the last ones we get to see more of who he actually is; so his behavior is gonna vary a lot depending on context)

But don't let feeling ooc hang you up! The more you write for Daryl (or any other character), the more you'll understand him, and subsequently the better you get. No matter how long I've loved a character or how well I feel I understand them, I'll still always be having sort of realizations or developments in my thoughts

OH THIS IS A BIG THING; imagine him as a real person, blissfully ignore the word "fictional" – this helps me connect to him way more and on a deeper level because I'm viewing him as someone that genuinely exists and has experienced these things (am I little out of touch with reality?... maybe)

His thoughts, emotions, inner monologue, how all these things had an impact on his development in childhood and adulthood, etc. Eliminating the idea of him being fictional might help you see him as a fully rounded person rather than bits of writing and acting we watch and read.

Think about how real world events & circumstances would've affected him (I view him as being born in 1975, so raised post-Vietnam war, lower income in a conservative area, redneck and white trash, War on drugs, 9/11, etc.) (Some of these aren't that important in writing him, but they might help in formulating ideas about who he is/ again, understanding him) – that idea in general is important though; theorize about how certain events/ scenarios (big world things or more mundane ones) would affect him/ how he'd react to them — all this wraps into the first things I said; about analyzing his character.

Okay maybe I'm rambling now, but overall just go for it and have fun with it! As I said, the more you do it, the faster it'll come to you, and the more solid idea of Daryl you'll formulate. Everyone has different interpretations of things and I love to see how others view characters compared to my own!

[kirklandsheartsecrets]

what do you think would their types be? like, what would they look in an s/o, what the wouldn't like, etc? be honest as possible bc i have this thing were i fall in love with a character then i go "wait they wouldn't like _____ and i'm so _____ oh wow even a fictional person wouldn't like me" destroy my feelings lmao

well, first of all i hope you find peace with yourself.

when you find peace with yourself honestly, this kind of situation rarely happen.

obviously we all feel bad once in a while and i understand + hear what you're saying right here.

In my writings i try to be inclusive whilst not giving too much information about the reader.

not in my house i'm telling you all.

i hope whoever is reading my stuff gets the comfort, love, attention they deserve. i started this blog because i couldn't find what i wanted.

i bring it now, and i don't want my few readers to feel bad about themselves for whatever reason.

sending everyone hearts because you deserve it.

i used to think the same because of my nationality, completely destructive. so i kinda understand where you're coming from with your ask.

real life or fictional, if someone doesn't understand or like you, don't blame yourself, it's their own problem. being someone's problem has nothing to do with how you are or look.

lets start :)

uk brothers II headcannons II what they would/wouldn't look in for a s/o

Wales

someone embittered

he would struggle quite a lot with that,

would try to help if he ever ends up with someone like this

you cannot change people but you can learn from them

he wants comfort in someone

he would tend to go towards people who share and treasure their loved ones

dylan reflects a lot what he recieves probably why that last point is important

he wants the best for his s/o so he deserves the best s/o too

Ireland

condescending people

no-no for him

he is the kind to fold himself so he is flexible to situations

people who mistake that "folding" from him tend to be condescending

he likes a lot people who are smart,

not smart like good grades- he doesn't care about that tbh

he wants someone he can have long talks with, debates and learn things

teach him something about your favorite subject and you won

England

malignant narcissist, mixed with grandiosity

really big struggle for arthur, malignant narcissists are helpless to him

you cannot change them and that's the worse

he would lean towards someone decisive, someone who knows what they want

by this, i mean personality wise. if you don't know how to dress today it doesn't matter.

be clear about your tastes, what you want in life.

and if not, it's absolutely fine, you'll grow this kind of confidence with him

Scotland

insolent people

respect yourself and others with him

passing remarks as insults will get you nowhere (i am not lying)

but, he tends to like people with witty comebacks, high verbal ability or skills

why ? he likes to discuss or joke with his s/o

while still being respectful, insolent people are different

high verbal abilities such as witty comebacks means you can listen to people correctly and also pay attention to your feelings

brings the best characteristics of someone in his opinion

N.ireland

men and women who show themselves as "pick me" people

any symbolic elimination act doesn't go well with him

shutting down, putting down someone for attention is violence

he leans towards people who are attentionate.

by this i mean, someone who will cherish their loved ones, each at a time

someone who makes time for their loved ones separately and makes them feel unique

someone who sees relationships and friendships as a meticulous works of art

[backhurtyy]

alright i was talking to @bisexuallsokka about some theatre atla thoughts and it spiraled and so now im making a post. here we go, an atla college theatre au that has no plot and no basis other than that i just finished tech week and have a lot of thoughts about what my favorite characters would do in the theatre. these are mostly tech based, just because that's what i know best!! also it's very long, so i put it under the cut :)

so, the thing that started it all- techie azula, or more specifically, carpenter/technical director azula. she runs her shop on a tight ship, where everything must be perfect and precise and the most beautiful damn thing that's ever come out of a university shop.

also, she's not just an amazing technical director, but she's also the best welder in the entire program. she walks in the first day and everyone goes oh god another actor got lost smh... but then she picks up the welder and starts working and everyone goes oh. shit. i see. no one's lines are cleaner than hers. no one's welds are more secure than hers. no one's faster than she is. she's terrifying when she has a welder in her hand and a welding helmet on her face.

zuko is a playwright, director, and actor, and he and azula absolutely have a dumb little actor/techie/sibling rivalry. everyone dreads production meetings with the two of them, because they just spend the whole time arguing, but no one can deny that the shows that they're both working on are the best ones.

katara is either an actress or a costume designer, i can't choose. actress compels me just because of the whole painted lady and june pippinpaddleopsicopolis and sapphire fire thing, but i also love the idea of katara being really good with fabrics and creating amazing costumes.

sokka isn't in the theatre program himself, but he absolutely comes to the shop to help with building the sets because he wants to support the shows that katara and zuko are working on. because of this, he has a weird friendship with azula, which both his sister and boyfriend despise. who let them be friends, they whisper to each other conspiratorially, unaware that azula and sokka are in the shop gossiping about their siblings over the sounds of the table saw and the welder.

haru is a sound designer. i don't know how to explain it, but i know it to be true in my soul. you can trust me, because i'm a sound designer and also i love haru. so there.

basically i'm just picturing haru sitting there with his headphones for hours, clicking through sounds trying to find the absolute perfect sound effect to complete this scene. sometimes toph will sit with him listening to what he has, and she'll give him advice about what to change or add.

jet is a lighting technician/electrician. i do actually have a basis for that, which is that i get the impression that he likes being up high (hello tree fort), and all the lighting people i know like being up on tall ladders and in genies and getting themselves into sticky situations just to hang a light. replace his hook swords with an ERS and a wrench, and you're set!

actually though, i think he'd be really good at mapping out all of the cable runs, remembering what all the different lighting fixtures are, knowing exactly how to program things, and he'd be super fast at hanging a light.

haru and jet are absolutely the annoying theatre couple who spend their breaks sitting next to each other, usually with haru's legs thrown over jet's while they rant about everything that's going wrong. (they're also really cute, though, because if they aren't working on a show together, they'll bring each other food during tech week, just to make sure they're eating and taking a break during such a long night.)

STAGE MANAGER YUE. she has all of her notes in her book color coordinated and all of her cues meticulously organized, and is really good at connecting with both the cast and crew. she also is very well versed in all areas of theatre, since she did acting for a long time before switching to tech, and so she has a really good grasp on how to help everyone with whatever problems they come across. and for all of her kindness and her good attitude, she's also really good at commanding the theatre and keeping everything on track.

suki is another character who i could see fitting in a lot of places, but i'm leaning towards acting, just because of things in the show like when she asks to see sokka's ticket or tells him deadpan that she's an elite warrior, only to burst into a smile and say she can get him backstage. i just see her getting a lot of lead roles and having this air about her when she's onstage that commands the entire room's attention.

ty lee is specifically a musical theatre major and always gets dance captain/student choreographer positions. she always keeps the cast and crews spirits up during the exhaustion of tech week, as well as organizes the cast and crew party at the end of the run.

mai gives me big scenic designer energy. no one ever looks at her and thinks she'd be a theatre kid, but she's always there doing crazy math to figure out how to build super elaborate and abstract sets. just, mai combining physics and calculus and art to create the most amazing sets.

i see toph being a sort of jack of all trades and floating around the theatre doing all sorts of things- directing, assistant sound designing, working on the production team and managing finances and stuff... no one's entirely sure what her major is, or if she's even in the program, and when she's asked she just smiles and walks away. no one's going to complain, though, because sometimes when they're on break during tech week, she'll let people pet her service dog.

aang also strikes me as being a stage manager, particularly an assistant stage manager. like he's always backstage, coordinating scene changes and giving cues and stuff. he's also always the one to design and create the programs, and if he isn't working a show, then he's there volunteering as an usher. he's also happy to float around, helping out sound and lighting and costumes and the shop as much as he can. everyone breathes a sigh of relief when they see aang's an ASM, cause they know the show is gonna be smooth.

piandao is the lead technical faculty member, while jeong jeong is the lead acting faculty member. they are married.

thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[shotorozu]

TITLE : CARTOON KISSES

pairing : todoroki shouto x reader

synopsis : it looks like your boyfriend doesn’t understand why you like miraculous ladybug, but i guess you could say that he was more jealous, than confused. thus— why he did that

legend : [Y/N = your name, L/N = your name] afab! reader with they/them pronouns, quirk not specific

note(s) : self indulgent because yeah, my birthday‼️‼️ yes i’m an aries. the episode i’m referencing in this fic is backwarder— season 3, episode 4, and dark cupid, season 1, episode 10

this is a birthday fic for me 💅🤍✨‼️

Lately, everything has been hectic— on both sides anyway.

Was it really your fault? Or was it his fault? In fact, it wasn’t either of yours faults. UA was just very meticulous about what the students should be doing when and how.

Then again, it wasn’t like you never saw your boyfriend— Todoroki Shouto; the boy with dual colored hair that could easily blend in with the peppermint candy isle. That’s not the point though, you do actually see him

The only time you get to actually spend some time with him, is when the two of you are in each other’s rooms. Either enveloped in each others arms, or really— doing the most random things, at the most random times.

Or the other possible outcome, watching shows together. Which would rather be right about now.

Shouto lays right beside you, his right arm draped around your shoulder to keep you in his firm hold. Meanwhile, you’re cuddled up right on his side, occasionally pressing your face into his shirt because why not?

“For crying out loud! can’t they just date each other already?!” You exclaim in absolute agony, watching the two main protagonists— Ladybug and Chat Noir, be playful with each other mid-battle.

Shouto’s gaze averts down onto you, and in reality— he doesn’t look all that invested, compared to you, who’s making commentary everytime something drastic happens in the episode. If he wasn’t, you couldn’t really blame him. He only just started watching this show with you merely a few days ago (really, it has only been 2 days.)

“Aren’t they like.. the same people?” He’s puzzled. The masks hide nothing! Even he could piece together that the two heroes could be linked to their civilian selves— most especially, Marinette. Since her persona doesn’t really have a drastic change her appearance, in comparison to her partner.

“Yes, that’s what makes this entire show so.. interesting! They’re so.. oblivious! And this has been dragging on for several years!”

Shouto’s confused, in all honesty. Really, what even is the love square? can’t they just say who they are? he’d guess that the mechanics are different, compared to the real world— where people already know who you are (excluding special cases)

He has so many questions, and his train of thought is put to an end, when he hears a high pitched squeal—

“DID YOU JUST SEE THAT?” You practically squirm in his hold, thrashing back and forth as you replay the scene of Chat Noir kissing Ladybug’s hand, as he bids farewell to her.

“He.. kissed her hand?”

“Yes!” You replay the scene, and you thrash around in your spot on the bed, practically fawning over the simple gesture. His expression falters when he sees you slip out of his grasp, and he can only gently pull you back in

When you kiss his cheek goodbye, as you part ways with him, he’s left sitting in silence. He doesn’t know what to think

I mean, it really could be a stretch of a situation. Why else would you be squealing watching such simple acts of romance— and it all seems too easy. Maybe you like guys similar to Chat Noir? who are natural romantics, and people that are just oozing of confidence? Maybe you love hand kisses? (It’s not like he doesn’t give you them, but.. out in public? not really.)

Or maybe.. there’s something else.

And maybe you like being called M’lady, and names similar to that? he doesn’t really know.

Which is why, he decides to binge at least half of the show, and understand the lore of “Miraculous | Tales of Ladybug and Chat Noir”

»»————-　♡　————-««

You’re puzzled when Shouto starts acting differently

I mean, it could be a dare for all you know— but he doesn’t seem like the type to drag out a dare for 5 days. He wouldn’t be that committed to a.. what would you call this?

It’s.. just different. He’s acting differently, and you could just hope it’s a prank, or even a drawn out consequence of a bet he manage to lose— it would be nice to know about the sudden change of attitude.

He says nothing the next time you guys have another miraculous marathon, nothing out of the ordinary! however, the youngest Todoroki seems to be wanting to do.. something.

As per usual, you’re seated next to him, a change compared to the usual times where you’re slumped against his side, which really— bugged your boyfriend.

Your eyes stayed glued onto the screen, as you attentively watched Chat Noir pull Ladybug down from a dangling roof, chest to chest, shushing her, as if he wanted to tell her all of the things that were on his mind at that exact moment

“It’s happening, it’s happening!” You squeal, as if it wasn’t the 10th time you played said scene— and by the looks of it, you’re a ‘ladynoir’ fan.

You can’t see it, but his two toned eyes narrow down into slits— and he grumbles, knowing that he probably should just.. do it. There’s not stopping it now, he’d take the chance.

When the moment nearly happened, you body made an impulse— and simply moved on it’s on, without much thought.

You wouldn’t have noticed it, due to the awfully large (to an outsider, it wasn’t a large distance, but to him, it was.) distance— but you’re awfully aware of the warm hand trailing down your forearm, your body immediately relaxes when he tugs on your arm with care, peppering kisses along your forearm, and going down to the backside of your hand.

“W-what are you doing?!” You exclaim in surprise, your cheeks heating up like a fresh batch of toast coming out of the toaster. Yet, your hot-cold boyfriend says nothing, and continues to plant kisses onto your skin with no hesitation.

Then, he makes a point to trail back higher and higher, every time his lips press against your skin, you only grow closer to the brink of overheating.

“I figured you’d be interested in such a gesture,” He mutters against the crook of your neck, not caring at all if the kiss he just pressed against your delicate skin, was rather damp at all.

You’re still stunned, you’d question whoever wouldn’t! A second ago, you were just watching cartoons and.. he was—

“I thought it would be nice to.. replicate them.” His gaze shifts onto the screen, referring to the cartoon, of course.

He.. was copying the show?

“You mean by.. flustering me like how Chat Noir flusters Ladybug?”

“You said it, not me.” Which only confirmed your previous theories and questions. You don’t know why and how you didn’t see this all before— but it does make sense now.

You fall forward, bursting into laughter. The effect of his actions seem to be the opposite of what he was hoping for

“I’m sorry, did I..”

“No! You actually got me, don’t get me wrong. You absolutely wooed me!” You poke at his cheek, in a poor attempt in brightening up the hush mood.

“In all seriousness, you don’t need to copy whatever Chat Noir does! Do what feels natural to you, and as much as I really liked that kiss, I prefer.. your signature style of kisses.” Shouto didn’t get the chance to question what you meant at that moment— it being all too quick, since you lifted his arm to rest against his side, your gaze suddenly apologetic “I’m sorry if you felt like you were doing things wrong. No character from a TV show can rival you!”

The knot that he didn’t even know existed, slowly eased away from the pit of his stomach. He smiles, content with your words— he didn’t know how you did it, how you knew the way to his heart with your words but.. he’s happy

“But it did work though, right? I did make you flustered.”

Yeah, Shouto is back to normal, when his terribly blunt questions come back.

And yeah, Chat Noir might be charismatic and swave, but at the end of the day— anything Shouto does fills you with satisfaction, up until the brim.

If it would be cartoon kisses, or his signature style of affection.

»»————-　♡　————-««

[glompcat]

As we come up on Thirteen’s third to last story, I just want to take a moment to really appreciate this era of the show, which is without question my absolute personal favorite era of New Who for so so soooo many reasons.

It has meant so much to me to see an unhinged, weird and deeply problematic female-coded character on TV who isn’t subjected to a cavalcade of punishment specifically because she is an abnormal female-coded being.

To see a character like that be a figure of authority and trust, even when she fucks up.

I love the anti-Imperialist message of it all.

The ways the stories constantly challenge white savoirism and the white man’s burden, how they challenge us to question the morality behind what the Doctor does and has always done on TV.

I love the way this era has handled questions of trauma, identity and memory.

The way it addresses abuse, the very naked way it takes parental abuse and slots sci fi terms into the sort of horrid self justifications and “I wouldn’t hit you if you weren’t bad” type speech abuse survivors know all too well, tackling that head on while in no way suggesting you should empathize with or forgive your abuser.

I love that Thirteen has reached a place where she can claim who she is. She doesn’t need memories beyond those of the lives she has lived since she was Theta Sigma at the Academy. She started out so unsure of herself, so lost and confused, and as the story progressed that only got worse and worse leading to increasingly bad judgement as she Went Through It. Yet now she has reached a place where she can look back on her life - gaps in memory and all - and say “I know who I am” and mean it.

I am consistently impressed by the way the writing reaches back to previous stories and uses them as a springboard moving forward. Dialogue from previous seasons are so overtly about events in later ones in ways that make every rewatch an absolute delight. This whole thing was planned out and plotted long in advance, and the knowledge of where this story was always going suffuses it as it built to where it currently is. The way this allows the writers to not revisit certain themes or concerns, because they know they have already explained and established certain concepts and reasons in previous stories we have seen has been incredible. The connections between Yaz’s grandmother’s watch and the Flux storyline alone! The multiple encounters with fanatics who have turned destruction into religions, figures who buy into the justifications for their terrible deeds in truly frightening ways! All of it was so clearly meticulously planned.

I can not express enough how much I have loved that Doctor Who has regular human companions and plots that don’t center around the Doctor.

The fact Ryan was a teen boy discovering his place in the universe while traveling the universe. His journey from a surly, prickly, resentful teen to an emotionally mature young man who wanted nothing more than to be there for the people in his life was a central part of the seasons he was in, but in no way directly tied to the Doctor themself nor was it framed as some universe ending mystery or struggle, which was both something we actually had never seen in New Who before and a joy to watch. He was confronted with various models of adulthood and masculinity throughout his journeys, situations that pushed him to constantly reevaluate what he had previously accepted to be the way things simply were, and in the end he discovered there is no greater strength than the ability to be there for the people you love. I love that his journey got to be the emotional heart of the show for so long, and am so pleased with how his journey ended.

The vulnerability of Yaz’s character arc. I don’t think we’ve ever been directly told before that any companion at all is someone with a history of suicidal ideation, and watching her slowly build up a sense of self worth while overcoming truly impossible situations, I really can’t put it in words. Yaz is without question my favorite New Who companion, she is the one I can relate to the most, the one whose reactions to it all probably most closely match what I myself would do if I had a chance to travel with the Doctor. Having story after story show how exceptional she is while she herself is unable to recognize her own abilities, it challenged me to rethink some of my own past experiences I had downplayed as things “anyone could/would do” and all the many times in my own life I had dismissed or minimized praise. I am a 33 year old grown adult, and this fictional character appeared during a true low point in my mental health and challenged me to reassess things. I too am someone who carries with me some pretty horrific scars from a childhood spent being bullied. I too tried to find a line of work that would let me “help” others (of course the one Yaz chose is a problematic mess, but she chose it for idealistic reasons and has not experienced its real darker side) and poured so much of my sense of worth into it, not getting anywhere with it hurt in ways I couldn’t quite explain. She is a character with a whole story arc about how the children of immigrants can/will never truly know their family’s history - a whole story about what means when your past is quite literally a foriegn country you have never visited. I never expected to find a character I could relate to and connect to on this many levels, but there she is, shining on TV as she finally FINALLY has reached a point in her journey where she knows she is good at this, that she can get it done, that her contributions have worth. Wow do I love this character.

I love that these characters get to live rather than see their lives ruined. New Who has had a distressing tendency where every person who joins the Doctor winds up dead or in some other other dramatic life changing state where they quite literally can never go home and/or see their loved ones ever again. It was reaching the point where imagining the chance to travel with the Doctor - being invited to come along on the journey - was no longer an appealing offer. After all, of the New Who companions, the three total prior to this era who got to see their families again after their journeys wound up stranded in another timeline, suffering with memories of a literal year of hell and trauma no one else around them could ever relate to or understand, and with their mind wiped so that they would go through life in a state where they explicitly believe themself to have no value or worth. Every single companion other than those three wound up dead or in a situation where they would never - ever - be able to contact the people they love again. It was all starting to get rather depressing and really not worth getting invested in any of them anymore? But thankfully we are seeing again that not all journeys with the Doctor end in torture and death. Fantasizing about journeying with the Doctor can be fun again.

I love that the Doctor is no longer just a super rich drop out from Eton the Academy whose parent’s name and money netted them a second chance at the school. No longer just a rich elite who was so endlessly bored with their life they decided to steal a vehicle and travel to other places to tell the people there they knew how to solve their problems better than they did. Now we have the story of the abused refugee forced to assimilate and abdicate their own identity. A perpetual outsider, in diaspora, journeying the stars searching for a sense of home.

I love how these new additions to the lore allow me to go back and revisit older stories through an entirely new lens.

Take - for just one example out of many - the story where the First Doctor companion Steven Taylor leaves for example. Before Series 12 I really didn’t think that much of it - in part because it is missing and watching the reconstructions can sometimes be a chore - and in part because I just didn’t connect to it all that much. But now? Now I look at that story about a scientifically advanced city of wealth exploiting the poor outside of their walls (which of course has always reminded me of Gallifrey), one that decides to do scientific experiments on the Doctor and extract traits from them and graft them into their own people, and I see a direct parallel to the Doctor’s forgotten past and trauma. I see the Doctor forgive the chief scientist as soon as he offers up an apology, and think about how starved for Tecteuns affection the Child must have once been. And I see them delight in the destruction of that city’s laboratory - calling it a place of evil as he does - and I know One has reached a place where they are ready to move on (that story, of course, was as close to One’s regeneration as Flux was to Thirteen’s). I love so much that I can read these things in brand new ways, gain new understandings of the characters from them. Find new depths. It’s what I love most about these sort of old franchises where so many authors are writing whatever they want within that world. There are so many audios and books and old stories I have revisited through entirely new eyes since the end of Series 12, and there are few things I love more than how fresh and new they felt with this new lens to view them through.

Speaking of, I love how open the Doctor Who Universe feels at the moment.

How many stories there are to be told, places to explore, unanswered questions left to our imaginations. Things are not all neat and tidy, and that urge to come up with stories is so very much there. I can not wait to spend years enjoying the various works made playing within this vast sandbox.

I could keep going, I am really emotional about this era? But I will just conclude by saying that I am going to miss Thirteen herself and I am also going to miss Chibnall’s creative direction and vision behind the show.

I deeply hope that moving forward we will not be returning to all white writers on the show, but fear that is the direction we may be moving back to. It was nice, for just this one era, to have stories penned by writers of color.

I am so tired of fans of this era being made to constantly apologize for liking it, hand wringing whenever they mention it brings them any form of joy. There is nothing wrong with honestly, earnestly, enjoying a TV show and I refuse to apologize for doing precisely that.

This is my favorite era of New Who, and I am very very sad that it is so close to ending.

[factsilike]

I’ve been seeing a lot of stuff about this lately-

I don’t understand why people complain that the character story quests are boring when said story quest is supposed to show how the character operates given their profession or life and their personality and how they work best in an environment suited for them?

Take Ayato’s story quest for example. He was shown as a commissioner of a major important faction that overlooks all of Inazuma’s affairs, along with two other factions, which is a very important and demanding position in Inazuma (as well as Ayaka’s older brother but that’s not important in his story quest), one that takes a lot of intelligence, resourcefulness, and meticulousness to maintain (not to mention his story quest literally tells how he came to be commissioner and how difficult it was for him to rise to where he is today). So of course his story quest is going to revolve around he operates and how he handles any problems he faces and how, in a given situation, he plans to come out on top! He was given a problem and his story quest shows how he is going to solve it, by which his personality and way of solving problems is shown!

And now people are saying the same stuff about Yelan. Like?? Have you not seen her character teaser? Her character demo? Her introduction in the livestream? Her in Collected Miscellany video? Literally so many ways of telling us that she is a important and mysterious undercover spy agent of sorts who comes and goes as she pleases (which is not an easy job and requires things like much training, intelligence, a knack for being thorough and secretive and an ability to notice things others don’t)  and when her story quest shows all of these traits and skills that she possesses and puts to use when approaching a problem that is related to her job, people complain that it is boring and uninteresting? That is just how her character is. It’s completely fine if you didn’t like a story quest for whatever reason. But no need to diss on the characters or the story quest just because it’s not for you, or because you didn't like it. 

Also not related to my point but imo her story quest was so freaking good and was really engaging, and showed how her investigating skills, acting prowess and Liyue’s political situations in the best way. It literally felt like reading a mystery novel. I don’t even like Yelan! But I loved her story quest because it was so engaging and interesting, and wrapped pretty nicely imo.

These story quests about the characters literally show just this; what the character is like in their daily life or in a given situation or when solving a problem, because it is meant to showcase their personality.

[wickedyan]

Ummm... can I just say how much I love your levi works?? ❤❤❤ i was wondering if you could make another yandere levi victorian arranged marriage? Like it dosent have to be victorian. But can you make it so that its a continuation of your first part ??? thanksss

Part 2 of this

Character: Levi Ackerman, Shingeki no Kyojin/Attack on Titan

Warnings: Dubcon, Noncon, Yandere, rough smut.

A/N:  I now know a lot about the Victorian era. What people wore in the daytime, in the evening, to bed… and their underwear. Specifically, how to take off the underwear… if you get what I mean ;)

On another note, woo! I finally completed this work! I’ve been working on it for over a week nonstop... hehe. I hope you all enjoy it! (This is the last part to this, I won’t be writing any more for it.)

Due to its length... and content, it’ll be placed under a cut.

-

His house didn’t feel like a house. Or a home. More like a castle. The gardens were large and meticulously well kept, with fantastical flowers and hedges that you only heard about in fairy tales. The gates to the estate were tall, with sharp-pointed tops and scary wires. It would ensure no unwanted guests could get in… and that no one that wished to leave without permission could get out.

The house itself was five times larger than your old home, and you could count at least twenty windows on the front side of the house.

Your long skirt dragged along the concrete paths, heels clicking in tandem with your new husband’s dress shoes. His arm was entwined with your own, having pulled you close to him, shoulders rubbing together with each step.

You clutched at your skirt as you ascended the stairs to the front door of your new prison. Servants opened the doors wide for the two of you, and you were hit with the fresh scents of lemongrass and ginger.

The entryway was sparsely decorated, a deep red rug centred on the floor with golden tassels fluffing the edges. A wooden table with gorgeous floral vases that you knew costed more than the dress and shoes you wore combined, with fresh red roses that were mid-bloom. The walls painted a simple beige colour and the roof was an odd pattern of mahogany wood with various animals carved into them. Old paintings lined the walls, you didn’t recognise any of the figures, but you recognised the cold eyes identical to Levi’s. His mother.  

Levi wasted no time pulling you through the entryway and through identical hallways, up squeaky mahogany staircases and into what seemed like his private bedroom. He pulled free from your arm, addressing a maid and ordering her to have you cleaned up and redressed with a grumble of “and burn that thing when you’re finished” …you couldn’t help but be offended, it was the fanciest dress you owned.

A kind-looking woman pulled you into an en-suite bathroom that connected to his bedroom. It was large, with a marble counter and basin, and a large bathtub with a shelf full of essential oils and fragrances. The bathwater was poured in, heated to a high temperature. You watched the steam coming off the water, it would be a while before the water was comfortable. The maid left you to undress, and you took your time. Slowly untying the shawl around your shoulders, you unceremoniously dropped it to the floor. Your shoes and stockings were next. Then the dress itself. There was a full-length mirror in the corner of the room.

You stood in front of the mirror, eyes skimming over your body. You weren’t skinny, but you weren’t overweight. Your parents worked hard to put food on the table for you, but you bet Levi barely had to lift a finger. You eyed your protruding hip bones, gaunt collarbones. You weren’t skinny… but you could stand to gain a few kilos.

The water stung your sensitive skin as you sunk into the bath, letting the water rise until only your head sat above the water. The cuts on your knees burned. Taking a deep breath, you submerged yourself, holding your breath as you wet your hair.

In only a few hours, you would lose your virginity. Your new husband would expect sex from you, and you would have no reason to deny him. Maybe you could tell him you weren’t feeling up to it… but Levi wasn’t stupid, he would see through your lies easily. You couldn’t help but wonder… would it be good…? Would you enjoy yourself?

Your heart pounded against your ribcage, nervous energy spreading throughout your shaking extremities.

Reaching for the soap, you made quick work of lathering it over your body, making sure to leave no spot untouched. He seemed to have special soap for your hair, it smelled of lavender.

Before you left the bath, you let yourself soak just a little longer. Until the water had cooled and your skin was pruney.

Fresh clothes had been left on the bed for you, you looked over them while you finished towel-drying your hair. It was evening, so you had been left an evening gown. It was much fancier than anything you had ever owned before. You almost felt wrong for wearing it. But you couldn’t deny its comfort, minus the corset that required help from several maids to tighten.

The dress was gorgeous. It was on off the shoulder neckline with long cream-coloured frilled lace. It was a peach colour, with large bows holding up more lace along the bottom of the gown. The number of petticoats and underskirts had your body hot, with a natural red flush to your cheeks and shoulders. The maids fawned over you, braiding your hair and applying cherry juice to your lips.

It was the prettiest you had ever looked, but the sour taste in your mouth wouldn’t leave. The maids, although just following orders, were dressing you up to have sex with their boss. It wasn’t so sweet when you put it in those words, but it was the truth of the situation.

You wondered if he wanted to bed you to show dominance over you. Maybe it was to show others that you belonged to him, he was the possessive type and he had arranged your marriage out of that sick idea. Maybe he wanted to impregnate you, really show the other nobles that you were his. Have you running around taking care of your children and speaking only when spoken to, like some little trophy wife.

Maybe he truly desired you.

You wanted more out of life. But he had stolen that chance from you. He had you right where he wanted you, stuck, locked away in his home and you couldn’t do anything about it. It was sickening.

Soon enough, the maids decided they were finished. And you were ushered down the stairs, where your husband was waiting for you at the dining table, a large feast laid out in front of him. Normally, the wife would sit on the opposite side of the husband, but he pulled you towards him, and you were sat in his lap.

Your face burned; an embarrassing show put on for the servants. But they made no comments on it. Smart of them, should they wish to keep their heads. You struggled in his lap, using the armrests to help push yourself out of his lap. His arms snaked around your waist, and with an iron grip, he pulled you back into his lap. No matter how much you squirmed, you couldn’t leave. You huffed a breath of annoyance, settling into his lap more comfortably.

You stiffened, feeling something hard beneath you. You wriggled, and Levi grunted hot air into the nape of your neck. Gooseflesh rose in its place.

“Careful, little lamb. Keep writhing on my lap like that and I won’t be able to control myself…” He murmured this low in your ear, a low growl on his tongue. Your body was hot, the pang of arousal that licked up your thighs was not helping.

Quickly you looked around, you were alone, so no one had heard him. You couldn’t help but feel relieved, if someone had heard that you wouldn’t be able to face them again… “You smell divine. I take it you enjoyed your bath?” He cut into the food, bringing a bite-sized amount up past you and to his lips.

You nodded in reply, “I did. Thank you.”

Although you couldn’t see it, you knew he was smirking.

He brought another square of food up on the fork, this time aiming for your mouth. He was going to feed you. Your lips parted, accepting the food. You chewed slowly, savouring the taste. It was delicious… you hadn’t ever tasted something with so much flavour. You couldn’t help but salivate. You usually ate things like mutton, bread and tea. This was something completely out of your league.

Dinner continued that way, alternating bites until you were both full.

Dread. It was Night. The sun nowhere to be seen. Levi had already returned to your shared bedroom. You sat in a room in front of the fireplace. It was warm, and from your position, you could see the moon from the window. You cherished this moment, the comfort and allowed yourself to forget what awaited you in his bedroom.

It was your bedroom too, now.

A maid came to collect you, and you were broken from your stupor.

When you arrived at the door to your room, it was closed. You could see the glow of candlelight from underneath the door. You rapped the door, waiting for an answer before stepping through.

Levi was in his nightclothes. He was on the bed, sitting up against the headboard with a book in his hands. Laying on top of the covers. The candlelight flickered as you shut the door behind you. He didn’t lift his eyes from his book, flicking over the page with a hum. You made quick work of changing into your own nightgown, grunting as you loosened the corset with only a little struggle.

You could feel his eyes gliding over your exposed shoulder blades and flitting down with the slide of your dress as it fell to the floor. Turning around, catching him in the act. But he didn’t look away when you turned. He continued staring unashamedly. Daring you to say something, as though a man couldn’t admire his wife.

When you crawled into bed beside him, you were almost convinced he had forgotten about his heated promise to you. Almost. He lifted an arm, inviting you into his space. Ignoring it made no difference because he pulled you into his side. Your head resting on his chest, one arm holding his book and the other stroking through your hair, curling it behind your ear. It was comfortable, domestic.

Levi smelled good. Was it some soap or essential oils? Perhaps a special cologne? What was the scent specifically? You couldn’t tell, but it had you breathing deeply, hoping to intake more and more of that pleasant smell.

He had reached the end of his page but instead of turning it as he had the past several pages, he closed the book. It was placed in its spot in his bedside draw. His hand rested on his stomach. Your palms were sweating, fingers twitching wildly. All through this, his other hand didn’t stop stroking your hair.

Until it moved, sliding under your jaw and tilting your face upwards toward his own. His hand stayed there, cradling your face. He took a moment to meet your eyes. His pupils blown wide, eyelids heavy and lips parted.

His lips met yours.

You gasped and Levi used this to slide his tongue past your lips. His tongue rolled over your teeth and tongue, exploring your mouth. It was warm and wet and practised. He nipped at your lips, licking over them in silent apology at your sharp intake of breath. How was he so good at this? He grunts, but you’re lost in the kiss. Your eyes were closed, hands reaching for his shirt to pull him closer, hot skin touching his, mewling and leaning into him.

That scent was back again, but he tastes like whisky and mint and maybe you should have pulled away, maybe it should’ve been gross, but it just wasn’t. His lips were firm but gentle, his tongue teasing and slow. His teeth dug into your lip, but his tongue was always quick to soothe the mark.

Levi pulled back with a groan, a lewd string of saliva connected you. He leaned in, sucking it up lewdly. “You taste better than I imagined.”

Sliding around the back of your head and into your hair, his hand pulled hard and smashed your lips together once more. Heat floods your thighs, you rub your legs together to create some kind of friction.

“Oh… Sir-Levi…” you breathe out between pants and sighs.

He’s on top of you, pushing you down and his legs between your thighs. Calloused hands roam your body leaving trails of heat behind them. Then he’s pulling open the buttons of your nightgown and pressing kisses down your neck. He lingers on a particular spot on your neck, harder kisses until he’s licking hot, wet stripes along your throat. He blows cool air over it, chuckling as your nipples harden amongst the goosebumps on your chest. His groin is grinding over your hips, fingers digging into the fat of your hips and squeezing so harshly you know it’s going to leave marks.

Teeth scrape over your collarbones and it has you squeaking out a high-pitched moan. You’re writhing under his burning touch, teeth biting so hard into your lip you can taste blood.

He pulls open the rest of your nightgown, exposing your chest to the cool night air. His lips are enclosing the hardened bud before you have a chance to be embarrassed. He sucks it into his mouth, circling it with his tongue and tugging with his teeth and it sends arousal straight to your core. His other hand is groping your other breast and you can feel the desperation in his touch. Your fingers rake through his raven locks, scraping against his scalp and pulling it, not knowing if it’s because it’s too much or because you have an inclination that he would like it.

A wet ‘pop’ is heard as he pulls off your nipple and moves to the other one to give it the same attention. Before he does, he kisses your sternum. His hungry eyes, wicked with desire, burn into your own. He takes pleasure seeing you so fucked out and he had barely started. “God, you’re beautiful…” He grins, he has you right where he wants you. A predator looming darkly over its prey. But this was the best part of the hunt. His reward.

“You belong to me now… you know that now, don’t you, y/n?” You nod, at his mercy.

He kisses the flesh of your bust, sucking the supple skin into his mouth and biting down. Hard. You cried out in pain, but he’s quick to move on, repeating the action and leaving deep purple marks all over your tits, moving back up to leave the same marks in more visible places. You shake your head, pushing at his shoulders. But he pushes back into you, you didn’t realise how strong he was.

“No- I… Marks. No…” You manage to speak amongst sighs. He snickers into your throat, the vibrations only making the sensations all the more pleasurable. He ignores your words, biting harder to show he heard you.

His hands ghost the length of your thighs, pushing the bottom of your nightgown up over your hips. Fingertips moved deftly, swiftly untying the strings keeping the front of your underwear together. He was quick to pull the last of the clothing hiding your body from his greedy eyes. You felt vulnerable, having your most intimate parts on display for the man. You squeezed your thighs together, or at least the best you could with him between them.

Strong arms held your thighs apart. He leaned down, hot breath blowing over your opening. Embarrassed, you covered your eyes with your hands.

“Eyes on me.” His voice was deep, demanding, controlling.

Slowly, you pulled your hands from your eyes, glancing up to witness his sinful expression. That devilish grin.

He was teasing as he leaned down, blowing hot streams of air over your pussy. Pulling the lips apart and staring back up at you from between your legs. Gaze dark. “My my, you are wet, aren’t you? So ready for me already?” His tongue dipped out to taste, licking a flat stripe up the length of your slit.

You gasped; eyes clenching closed before remembering to keep your eyes locked on his. Mirth in his stare. “I’ve been watching you, longing for you, keeping such a close eye on you… for months… never did I think you would look so delicious in my bed.”

Two fingers rubbed against your slit, grinding back and forth over your hole. Gentle “Ohhh…”’s and “Ahhh…”’s sighed from your mouth. Scooping up your slick and using it to press firm circles over your swollen clit.

That felt… good. Really good.

Levi paused, pulling his fingers away, scissoring them and holding them closer to the candlelight. “I guess… a taste wouldn’t hurt.” And his fingers were being sucked into his mouth. He licked around them, groaning. “Fuck… so sweet…” It should’ve been embarrassing but you had never been more aroused.

“I wish I could taste you more, but I can’t wait any longer.” He was tugging his own nightclothes off, untying the knot of his underwear and pulling his hard cock free. It twitched in his hand, heavy and girthy. He scooped more of your slick into his hand, stroking it over his cock. He threw his head back, a growl deep in his throat. “God… I finally have you, y/n… just fucking look at you… all mine.”

The heat of his cock was rubbing at your cunt, grinding it against your clit and fuck you wanted him. There’s a dark look in his eyes, and you suddenly remember that this man took you from your family and arranged a marriage with you to sate some sick obsession he had with you.

You kicked at his shoulder, sending him falling backwards and scrambling to get off the bed. But he pins you down, large hand wrapping around your throat and pushing you back into the sheets. His firm grip on your throat makes breathing difficult, you scratch at his hand but it’s no use.

He thrusts his entire length into you, fucking you into the mattress with such force you can hear the animalistic slapping of skin on skin and it only makes you wetter. His eyebrows are furrowed, angry. You scream, as best you can with his hand around your neck. He silences you with a searing kiss, much less gentle than before, with teeth clashing together.

The gentleness that had been in all his previous actions was gone; he gave no pauses while he pounded into you. He was snarling as he hammered unapologetically into you. “You can never leave me, brat. Be my good, submissive girl and I’ll reward you. Misbehave and you will not enjoy the punishment.”

Despite his rough movements, the pain and pleasure worked together, and it had you clenching around him because it just felt so good.

“Aw,” he sneered, “You’re enjoying this aren’t you?” His thrusts had a sense of urgency to them, and he bit his lip as he growled in your ear. His free hand assaulted your clip with delicious friction that had the pleasure in your gut building until it was nearly ready to burst.

Levi grunted, “I’m gonna cum… and you’re gonna take every. Last. Drop.” He punctuated his words with forceful thrusts into your cunt.

“Cum with me… cum now.”

And that pleasure burst, clenching uncontrollable around his cock and milking each rope of sticky white fluid that filled your pussy.

He heaved over you, releasing his grip on your neck, and slowly pulled his softening cock out of your sopping pussy with a squelch.

He left you on the bed, panting and wrecked. Your forehead and hair damp with sweat, covered in his teeth marks and bruises that would be impossible to cover. His cum leaking out of your ruined cunt. He returned with a damp cloth, the cold liquid making you flinch, then relax into the soothing feeling as he wiped at your intimates.

Your eyelids felt heavy, and you couldn’t will yourself to move. But soon there was something being placed around your throat.

“Mmm… fits perfectly.”

It was a white, lace collar, with a dainty little heart.

‘Levi’

“Now, you’re truly mine.”

[thestraggletag]

Roll for Initiative, a Rumbelle D&D Fic

Summary: Tales of the Enchanted Forest was the hottest online D&D game, in part for its charismatic players, in part for the twisted turns of the DM's mind and in part because of the outrageous chemistry between its greatest OTP, the party's beautiful bard and the Dark One, an anti-hero side-character who is there to provide information and uncomfortable levels of UST. Mr Gold thinks it's a harmless flirtation that could never become anything else, just like his silly little crush on the town librarian, Belle French.

He's wrong.

Rating: Explicit.

Author’s Note: Surprise, @argoslight​, it is I, your Gifter! Sorry to make you wait till near the end but I just had way more banter to write in me than I thought. I hope you enjoy your gift. I’m so sorry to not be able to add more D&D elements but since I don’t play I don’t have a lot of idea of what could be done. Also I apologise for any mistakes! And thanks so much to @little-inkstone for her help and D&D knowledge.

The castle was quiet when she entered, her steps echoing against the stone. It was gloomy inside, curtains obscured and decor sparse and sombre, the castle living up to its name. But there were flowers on the table, moon lilies, her favourite flower. They bloomed only in the Eastern Mountains past the Old Wall, but she had long since suspected he grew some on one of his enchanted hothouses, with the excuse of using them for potions. 

“Where’s the rest of your pretty little troop of do-gooders, dearie?”

The voice came out of nowhere, echoing around the empty halls of the castle. Thankfully she did not need directions, knowing exactly when to turn and where to go. Soon she found herself in a vast room, with a table on the centre and curios filled with oddities and the like. Some others were displayed on pedestals, including a rather fearsome sword and a nasty-looking crown made of thorns. None of the artefacts were what she sought, but she was not there to bargain for an item, but rather for information.

“Off on their own quests, taking care of other things that need doing.”

The voice tsked, seeming not to approve.

“They let you enter the lair of the beast alone? Some heroes.”

The woman lowered the hood of her cloak and walked towards the unlit chimney. Immediately a fire blazed to life, as if the castle itself was trying to cater to her comfort. The fire provided much-needed light as well, revealing the profile of a man in the shadows. Or something that looked like a man, at least, if not for the reflective scales that covered his body and its strange eyes: gold irises around catlike pupils.

“I asked to come alone. I felt like we could talk more openly this way.”

She removed her cloak, ostensibly to drape it across a chair near the fire and let it dry. The creature, however, seemed to read more into the gesture, tsking again.

“You come here all alone, a pretty little lamb, and take off the only real bit of protection you have. Reckless, dearie, most reckless.”

 The creature stood up, walking slowly towards the light, revealing more of its form as it approached her. Leather pants and a long, reptilian-looking vest and coat. It wasn’t particularly tall but power emanated from it in suffocating waves. She closed her eyes, finding his cloying presence strangely comforting. Then again, she had always been odd. 

“Once again your pitiful little party of friends needs my help. How they weigh you down, Beauty.”

He stepped fully into the light then, revealing a being more creature than man, the reptilian skin and claws as off-putting as his unnatural eyes. She should’ve taken a step back, should’ve gone for her blade or the dagger tucked into her left boot, but she didn’t. As much as she knew she shouldn't, she felt at ease in his presence. Well, perhaps not quite. She certainly felt a strange sort of anxiousness in his presence, a fluttery sort of feeling that she attributed to being particularly attuned to his magic. None of the other members of her party felt that way. If anything, he repulsed them, which wasn’t something she could understand. To her he was… magnetic.

“Are you in the mood for dealing or not? I can trade for information.”

He snorted.

“With what? Your little band of misfits is dirt poor. That idiotic paladin of yours ruined your last mission. You really should think about ditching the man. All brawn, no brains. At least your rogue is a smart woman.”

His gaze left her briefly, running down the length of her clothing: sturdy black boots, a nicely-cut dress that stopped around the knees and a sturdy belt with a few pockets for her spells. But the clothing, as well-made as it was, was dated, old. Looked worn and was signed and stained in places, and it left a lot of her frail human skin exposed. She had not been able to afford an upgrade in a while, preferring to spend her coin in what could benefit the group.

His moue of distaste disappeared once his eyes fell on her cloak. Well, his cloak, since he had been the one to make it. It was a lovely thing in varied shades of green, shot through with golden thread, his trademark. She had bought it off him a long time ago, a simple thing to keep her warm during cold nights and dry when it rained. Miraculously, though, it also did not sustain damage, looking exactly the same as when she had first put it on.

“I’m glad at least my protection is serving you well.”

He ran a claw along the seams of the cloak, making it glitter, like to like, magic calling for its own. He looked smug, as if pleased she was wearing something he had made.

“It does more than we bargained for. I’ve been blasted with magic strong enough to burn through most fabric but it has not even frayed. How strange of you, Rumplestiltskin, to lose out on a deal.”

He shivered when she said his name, walking behind her to the safety of the shadow she cast next to the fire.

“Can’t help it if my magic is just that powerful, my dear. I’m glad you are a happy customer. Always thought that cloak was a nice bit of magic. Can’t fault you for always wearing it.”

She felt him close in on her from behind, to the point that it almost felt like they were touching.

“It smells like you. That’s why I wear it all the time.”

The noise he made behind her was inhuman, a cross between a whimper and a growl. His claws scrapped against the back of her dress, the feeling muted by her stays, but she could feel his breath against the back of her neck and that alone was-

“Hey, this is a decent stream! Keep it PG for the kids, you weirdos.”

“Damn it, Grumpy, I wanted to see how long it would take them to snap out of it!”

“Sorry, Snow, but I ate a big dinner and I aim to keep it down.”

The messages in the chatroom wheezed by, mostly disgruntled complaints about their OTP never catching a break. The other participants in the stream were mostly silent, their mics muted likely to hide the amused snickers. There was no video feed on any of the members of the party, all of them represented instead by artwork to preserve their anonymity. Once upon a time that had been a fanciful choice, and perhaps a way to stay safe when interacting with strangers on the internet. Now it was mostly to keep their private lives from being overtaken by the popularity of their stream. “Tales of the Enchanted Forest” was shaping up to be one of the hottest D&D online streaming shows, already on its third campaign and counting.

“Beauty is just trying to get us some answers, Grumpy. We can’t just go stumbling about hoping to run into some fairy wand by chance.”

“Oh, it’s that what the kids are calling it these days?”

“Enough! Can we get back to the campaign already? It took me weeks to plan and it kinda hinges a bit on the Dark One helping, which needs to happen today.”

“Fine by me, dearie, if the dwarf can curtail his temper.”

The party was composed of five characters, a paladin, a cleric, a bard, a rogue and a thief, which along with the Dungeon Master made up the regular cast of every weekly stream. But given the popularity of the show, and the amount of time they had been playing, they had managed to amass a good amount of side-characters, guests invited every now and then to help the campaign move along and keep the interest of the audience. And by far the most popular of those guests was the Dark One, a wizard of unknown lineage and tremendous power that served both as an antagonist and a pseudo-ally depending on the situation. 

His presence was likely the reason why the livestream’s numbers looked so robust. He had amassed quite a fanbase, due in part to the commitment the player put on the character (the voice-acting was above and beyond what anyone could’ve expected from an amateur performer, and the backstory was quite complex, revealed in bits and pieces fans had meticulously assembled together) and in part to the chemistry he had managed to develop with the group’s bard, a half-human named Beauty.

“Okay, let’s all go back to what we were doing.” The DM’s voice was authoritative, though also more than a bit pissed off. “Okay, Beauty, you were about to try and cajole the Dark One to sell you the information you needed in return for a vial of water from Lake Nostos. Though the water is valuable, it’s not guaranteed to be enough to tempt the wizard. You have to roll at least a 13 in persuasion to make the trade. Roll when you’re ready.”

...

Rumford Gold stretched within the confines of the small backroom of his shop, where he had his computer stuff set up. Initially he’d bought the computer to better conduct his online business. His laptop at home wasn’t cutting it and it was better to photograph the antiques, update the website and handle the deliveries from his place of business. He had bought a good camera, some light fixtures and, on a whim, a microphone, for instances where he might need to virtually communicate with clients. It was something that was happening more and more, especially because a lot of his clientele was European. The internet had truly turned his antiquing- more of a hobby than a profession originally- into a profitable business.

He had gotten into watching D&D while waiting late at night for a client to become available in Austria. He had played as a lad, one of the few happy moments he could remember from his childhood in Glasgow, but had given it up once he had met Milah. And after they were over he had been too involved in making something of himself to remember past childhood enjoyments. But apparently D&D had evolved with the times and he had gotten into the habit of searching for and watching online D&D campaigns in his spare time. From that to actually being a side-character in one of them took almost no time. It was frightfully easy to go back to that frame of mind of playing make-believe, only now he had a distaste for the clean-cut heroic types and more of an affinity for the morally-grey, shady characters.

So he had auditioned for the role of evil-wizard when there had been an opening for a side-character in his favourite D&D stream, The Enchanted Forest. And though the DM had written what he considered to be a very flat, uninteresting character, he had been able to give it his own spin. He knew the DM hated him for it, hated when he deviated from what was expected of him, but people loved him. It was half the fun, pissing the DM off.

The other half, he had to admit, was Beauty. The one with the brains in the group, clearly, a half-human, half-fairy bard with an uncanny ability to think ahead, and arm herself with knowledge. Most of the other members of her party were more apt to try and decapitate something than negotiate with it, or even befriend it. Beauty prided herself on more of a gentle approach, which sometimes got her treated as the “fragile” one. He thought it just made her all the more interesting.

Their flirting had just kinda happened. He was half into it before he realised it had begun at all and by the time he had grown conscious- and self-conscious- of it fans were lapping it up and loving it. Even the DM, as loath as he was to admit it, found the banter engaging, even as if stole the spotlight from his story and where he wanted it to go. So every now and then he got invited into a stream, sometimes to interact with the whole party and sometimes, like the session he had just finished, to speak only to Beauty. And what was supposed to be a brief conversation before the party moved to greener pastures became a whole session, with the chatroom full of engagement and the view count off the charts.

But the DM had had a short tolerance span tonight, and had nipped things in the bud much sooner than usual. He felt… unfulfilled. Unsatisfied. Itchy, almost, in a way. So he was more than happy when he received an email from Beauty, who seemed to share his dislike of how the session had played out. They had started doing that more often, sharing emails after a session, even when he did not participate in it. It was harmless, he thought. Just an innocent online flirtation that could never realistically turn into anything. Not that his more in-person romantic overtures could ever pan out. He was in his third year of being completely smitten by the local town librarian, and in his second year of being able to put two words together in front of her without the help from Scotch, something he was perhaps a bit too proud of. And though he had decided very early on that the whole thing was utterly hopeless he had not been able to steer his thoughts or affections away. Realistically he was perhaps more in love with the idea of Belle French than the reality itself, given how little he had personally interacted with the woman. But he knew just enough to fill in the blanks and create a beautiful picture of how he imagined her to be: bookish- an easy assumption given how many times he had caught her in public places absorbed in a book-, kind, generous and delightfully able to hold a grudge and enact revenge when the time came. A bit reckless, and sometimes quick to form opinions, but also quick to revise them. A tactile person, with a great sense of fashion and a carelessness about what was expected of her.

He saw her in his head as clear as day, but little of that image was based on any personal knowledge of her. So, perhaps, he had found in Beauty a fictional substitute, someone he could talk to, and flirt with, without consequences, adopting the persona of someone more confident, more at ease with that sort of thing. The Dark One was comfortable in his skin in a way that he could only pretend to be sometimes. All the money and power he had accumulated over the years had helped him evolve from the spineless, cowardly lad he had once been, but when it came to certain situations, especially those that necessitated a level of vulnerability, he was still hopeless.

Perhaps, he wondered, it was better to think about his online liaison with Beauty as the real thing. They wrote to each other often, in and out of character, and over the course of their correspondence he had confided in her more than he had in any other person alive. Small things at first, every day peeves and details. Nothing that could identify them, certainly, but surprisingly intimate nevertheless. And over time it had grown to stuttering confessions and barings of the soul on both sides. She had told him of her teenage years in a mental asylum, the product of an overwrought widowed father trying to do right by his grieving daughter. He had had a few choice words to say about that, uncharitable thoughts about her father prompting his own willing sharing of the sad story of his childhood, neglectful father and all. It had felt nice, to confide in someone, someone he trusted.

He glanced at her email, where she lamented how their scene had not been as long or as satisfying as she had wanted, and saw she was proposing to meet later in a private stream to finish it the way they had both wanted. She had proposed something similar once or twice before and he had politely declined but now he wondered why not take her up on her offer. What was stopping him? His imaginary idea of Belle French, who in reality had never given him more than a polite smile in passing? Too young, too good, too beautiful to ever see him as anything other than an old cripple? Whatever he had built with Beauty felt infinitely more real, and attainable. A relationship without ever meeting in person seemed ideal in many aspects and, perhaps, if and when it came to meeting in the real world, his physical shortcomings would not be relevant, nor would it his rather uncharitable reputation.

He sent her a quick reply to arrange a meeting, feeling like a bit of roleplaying was, in the end, quite harmless. And if it were to lead to something a bit more meaningful, well, perhaps it was about time.

…

“Water from Lake Nostos. A key ingredient in most powerful potions and even some spells. I’m sure it could prove useful to you.”

The bard showed him the glowing crystal vial hanging from a long chain around her neck, with the glowing milky-white water from the cursed lake in it. He made a move to get closer to inspect it but the woman took a step back, tucking the vial back inside her bodice. The wizard’s eyes lingered there, hiz gaze growing intense. The bard felt her skin flush in response, something that felt a bit like fear but wasn’t running down her spine.

“And I’m sure a new wardrobe could prove useful to you, dearie. You’re practically wearing rags.” Rumplestiltskin made a show of running his eyes up and down her form with just enough disgust in his face to make it seem as if he was only noticing the rather sad state of her dress. 

“It’s my best gown, I’d thank you not to insult it.”

He made a moue of disapproval, shaking his head for good measure.

“You’re far from your days as a princess. I hope seeing the world is worth putting up with your band of idiots that waste most of the gold they earn with your wit in pointless goose chases that you know will lead nowhere.”

Beauty didn’t respond. There was nothing she could say to contradict what he thought of her party, none of which was charitable to say the least. And she also knew that he was aware that all of it was worth the freedom she had won when she had left her life in her father’s castle behind. She did miss one or two things, perhaps. Her mother’s vast library being one and, perhaps, some of the fashions. Not so much the silhouettes- she had never liked how the sea of petticoats she was always forced to wear restricted her movement- but the fabrics and colours, certainly. And the shoes.

“I’m here to make a deal, Dark One. Are you doing business today or not?”

Lesser creatures would’ve rather bitten off their tongues that throw cheek at the Dark One, but Beauty did not even bat an eye, lips curling in a defiant little smile that had the wizard smirking, something like admiration blooming in his chest. It’s what he loved most about his little bard, her spine of steel. And perhaps her blue eyes, but that was neither here nor there.

“I don’t do business with raggedy urchins, dearie. If you want to sit down and negotiate you’ll need a bath.” He made a face, as if he could smell her across the room. “And a change of dress, while I put your current outfit to wash… Or set it on fire, I haven’t decided yet.”

She could tell that he was pulling his punches, that he was playing at being repulsed by her state of dress and hygiene just bad enough that she would see he did not really mean it, not in any real way. She would’ve been able to tell either way, but it was nice that he thought it important to spare her feelings. And she couldn’t deny that a bath sounded heavenly after so many weeks on the road, sleeping out in the open and washing in freezing-cold creeks whenever possible.

“Well, if you insist…”

He took her to a well-lit and spacious bathing chamber, with the biggest copper tub she had ever seen, already filled with warm, soapy water that smelled of vanilla. She wasted no time after the door closed behind him, stripping quickly, careless of her worn and mended garments, and slipping into the tub. It was heaven on her tired muscles, and her dirty skin, and though she would’ve stayed there for hours she knew that every minute spent bathing was a minute less with the Dark One. Their time was limited. If she didn’t return to camp in the morning her party would venture into the castle, likely thinking the most dreadful scenarios. She could picture Charming attempting to kick the front gate open and getting hurt for his troubles. She could not let them worry for her, or risk the rapport she had developed with the Dark One by coming in unannounced. 

She got out of the tub with only a bit of reluctance and found a towel that she was convinced was enchanted to dry her faster than possible. She found clothing laid out in the adjoining dressing room, the undergarments soft and made of pale cream fabric and the dress of a lovely velvety, forest-green fabric, with a belt embroidered in small pearls that matched the detail about the neckline. She put it on gladly, twisting every which way to lace it up at her back. Living a less princessy life had made her acquire a number of small skills, including the ability to dress up mostly by herself even in gowns that did not lace up at the front, like most of her travelling clothes.

She did not spot her mauve travelling dress or her boots, but she was sure that Rumplestiltskin had whisked them away and would subtly mend them with magic, though she was sure he would deny it if she were to point it out. The green dress was accompanied by matching slippers, butter-soft and silent as they touched the stone floor. She made sure to dry her hair out, noticing how it shone red-gold in the flattering light of the candles, and took her time brushing it and styling it out of her face, so it fell flatteringly down her back. Her neck and most of her upper torso was bare but for the chain keeping the vial of water tucked safely against her breasts, the wide neckline of the dress dipping low enough to leave her collarbones bare, but she didn’t mind it. She was inside the Dark Castle, with the Dark One. She was safe there. On the road she always had to think about not attracting unwanted male attention. Here she rather felt like the opposite.

It was a silly infatuation, and many would argue any interest or desire on her part was due to the wizard’s power, which some would say was an aphrodisiac potent enough to make some look past the Dark One’s rather unfortunate exterior. No one would ever believe her if she confessed she rather… liked his appearance. The green-gold skin, the wild hair, the talons, but also the exquisitely-tailored pants and vests, the frothy cravats, the slim coats. A beast and a gentleman. A rather enticing combination, she had found.

She went downstairs into the trophy room once more, where two massive chairs were pulled up next to the roaring fireplace, the main source of light. The Dark One was sitting in one of them, a snifter gingerly held by a clawed hand, containing some sort of brown-gold liquid. He glanced at her the moment she entered the room, unwilling or unable to hide his appreciation for what he saw. He had removed his coat, leaving only his high-collared vest and one of his open shirts to cover his upper body, no forty cravat in sight. He seemed less guarded, more adventurous than he usually was when it came to matters of intimacy.

“You clean up well, dearie. Wish I could say the same for your dress. A wash will only do so much for it, but I refrained from throwing it into the fireplace. You’re welcome.”

“Good, as it’s not your property to destroy.” Beauty sat down, with a poise that betrayed her royal upbringing, and primly crossed her legs at the ankles. “So, Dark One, are you prepared to deal with me now?”

She had dealt with him dozens of times before, she had no idea why it all sounded so much like innuendo now. She couldn’t say she minded it.

“Of course, my dear. I’ve had time to think about our deal whilst you were splashing about in the tub.” His sing-songy voice broke, getting suddenly deeper for a second or two, as if he was struggling to retain his composure. “The vial is certainly a good start, but perhaps not quite enough. Now, I’m prepared to be generous given our long and fruitful history of dealmaking together, but I must also keep up certain appearances. So I thought I would also demand… an evening of your time.”

He tried to make it sound sinister, but she was past getting scared of him. At least in the traditional way. She raised an eyebrow, adopting a rather coquettish expression.

“And what would an evening of my time entail exactly?”

“Oh, well, you know. Companionship, perhaps a game of chess, some good wine, conversation and the like.”

She made a show of thinking it over before offering her hand, which he shook without delay.

“It’s a deal.”

Several hours later she had won two games of chess, one game of checkers, and was sipping from her third coupe of sparkling wine as she listened intently to a story about a deal the Dark One had once made with a king from a distant land. He was a gifted storyteller, engaging and funny, knowing exactly when to pause or gesticulate to keep the flow of the story just right. The king in his tale was rather unfortunate, in the sense that his hubris and arrogance had led him to make a deal with the Dark One that he did not understand. Most of Rumplestiltskin’s deals seemed to be like that, Beauty thought. And when he came to collect people dared be indignant that he demanded what they promised in the first place.

“The king was furious. Never let go of the grudge. Hired several assassins to try and kill me. A waste of gold, of course.”

He let out a trilling laugh, which soon proved to be contagious. Somehow, over time, it felt like their chairs had moved closer, because if she stretched out a hand she could easily touch him. Odd.

“Serves him right, for making such an open-ended deal. What a rookie mistake.”

She didn’t recall removing her slippers but she must have, because her feet were enjoying being pressed against the soft cushion of the chair. He made a gesture for her to lean close, which was a bit of a balancing feat, but she managed. Her heart skipped a bit when he leaned close too, almost pressing his mouth against her ear.

“You have no room to talk, sweet. You struck a very vague deal yourself, committing to an evening of conversation, chess ‘and the like’. That little turn of phrase is an invitation to all manner of sins, even the darkest and most decadent of debaucheries.”

He hissed the last part, making her shiver. Not content with letting him have the upper hand she turned her head so their lips were inches apart.

“That’s what I was hoping for.”

She could tell she had shocked him into inaction. Cocky Dark One, always in control of the conversation, always one step ahead of everyone else. It was nice to see him floundering, to catch him unprepared. Finally he gulped and put a little distance between them.

“Aren’t you the bravest little poppet.”

“My mother always said ‘Do the brave thing and bravery will follow.’ I’m a firm believer of the principle.”

Slowly, almost painfully so, both his hands clutched at the armrests of her chair, effectively pinning her to it. She knew she was supposed to be scared but she felt nothing but excitement, a buzzing just beneath the skin that made her strangely needy for something. Touch, perhaps, or more. The feeling was so overwhelming she did not realise at first that the laces of her dress were coming undone, as if invisible hands were painstakingly pulling them loose. She tried to make eye contact, but he ducked his head, pressing his face against the base of her neck, where it met her shoulder. She sighed, noticing how gentle he was, his touch feather-light, and discovering that she would not mind a rougher treatment. He was restraining himself, she realised, trying to be a gentleman. Sweet, but not what she wanted from him at that moment. Feeling bold Beauty carded a hand through his hair, pressing his face more firmly against her skin.

“Please, Rumple.”

Those two words seemed to have a magic of their own, producing a sudden and radical change in him. He moved too fast for her to see, wrapping her up in his arms and depositing her on the long dining table on the other side of the room. She did not know whether he used magic or simply moved inhumanly fast, but either possibility excited her, reminded her of the power of the creature looming over her, claws tugging at the unlaced bodice of her dress, dragging the velvet down to expose her undergarments. She was wearing the underbust corset he had provided over the snowy linen shift he had also left for her, so it was easy for him to simply tug the shift down a bit to expose her breasts. He leaned forward, nuzzling the space between her breasts, making a sort of satisfied purring noise as he sniffed up her clavicles and down her throat. Then, once he was happy with the level of squirming she was doing, he finally gave her what she wanted, closing his mouth, with all of its sharp teeth, around one of her rosy nipples. It was a strange feeling at first, more unfamiliar than pleasant, but when he began to suck it changed completely, little shocks of pleasure running from her nipple to between her legs. It was amazing, more than she had ever achieved with her own hands whenever she could get some privacy at night, and the feeling doubled when he grasped her untouched breast, his long claws estimulating the other nipple.

She sunk both her hands in his hair, fisting it in an effort to keep herself from squirming too much, feeling both aroused and impatient. She kept waiting for him to tire of her chest and move further down but when he was finally done sucking her nipples his head moved north, his lips blinding searching for hers till they were kissing. It wasn’t anything like any kiss she had experienced before, not even the unpleasant smack her former fiance had forced on her. Though it was just as forceful there was a wild quality to it, one she had never associated with the affectionate gesture. It was heavenly, the release of passion, far from cooling her down, setting her on fire, stoking her need for him till it felt like she would explode if he didn’t give her relief. 

He must have sensed it, her desperation calling to him like a siren song, because at some point he let go of her mouth to travel south, past her aching chest, and velvet-covered belly to where the skirts of her long gown kept her modestly covered. He wasted no time dragging the heavy fabric up, letting it pool around her hips along with the white linen of her shift. She did not have any other undergarments, having not been provided with any, so she was completely exposed to his gaze, from her milky things to her round hips. She squirmed, trying to picture what he must be looking at, the trim thatch of chestnut curls at the apex of her legs, obscenely drenched by this point and making a poor show of trying to hide the pink, glistening flesh beneath.

“What a lovely cunt you have.” His voice was dark, guttural, a monster trying to speak like a man. It thrilled her. “Let me drink from it, precious.”

He didn’t wait for her reply, choosing instead to simply bury his head against her flesh, his tongue rough and wide as it lapped at her field parting them to seek out the bundle of nerves that was throwing for attention. She arched her back, feeling like it was only her firm grip on her thigh and hip what kept her anchored to the table. She fell into a rhythm of sorts, her body seeking out something she could not find but his mouth striving to compensate, to give her what she needed. It was heavenly and seemed to last an eternity, the sensations building up till everything but them faded away, all sensations muted. She felt him move to, thrusting his hips against the edge of the table, making it rattle in a way that spoke of his sheer brute force. It was heady to have someone like Rumplestiltskin, who had always strived to don the mask of a gentleman around her, be so unhinged, so animalistic. More than anything it was that complete loss of control what drove her over the edge. She cried out, feeling her inner muscles coil and her senses spiral out of control, her orgasm leaving her dizzy. It seemed to last forever and not nearly long enough. She laid there for a while after the feeling passed, feeling satisfied and wanting at the same time. A few seconds later he also keened, slumping against her still-parted legs, his hair tickling the soft skin of her inner thighs.

They lay that way for what seemed like ages, while they scrambled to try and collect themselves. The afterglow did not feel awkward or uncomfortable, and it loosened up her tongue enough to venture out that she had hoped for an even more intimate act, a joining that was even deeper than what they had done.

 “A deal for such a prize would have to involve all my deepest secrets, my most valuable truths.” He paused, pressing his forehead against the silky inside of her thigh, like a penitent would. “One day, perhaps.”

...

“Do you want to meet? I think it’s time.”

The orgasm had mellowed him out, otherwise he was sure he would’ve at least panicked a little bit. But in the afterglow of what they had just shared, albeit virtually, a meeting did not seem like such a bad idea. In hushed voices they arranged the time and place, tomorrow at a café and bistro in Boston. Nice and public, for both their safety. They knew both lived near Boston, so it seemed natural to pick the city. The drive wasn’t too bad, and he hoped it wasn’t a great inconvenience to her either.

Reluctantly they said their goodbyes, both trying to prolong the moment a bit more till they were both close to nodding off. With a final, reluctant goodbye they both disconnected, leaving Gold to clean himself up and make his way home. With his rumpled suit, disheveled hair and five o’clock shadow it must have looked like the walk of shame. It certainly didn’t feel that way.

...

He woke up in a happy mood, perhaps the best in a long time. Far from feeling stupid or embarrassed about his little bit of roleplaying-turned-porn-session he felt smug, empowered by the notion that he had made a smart, desirable woman come with only his voice and imagination. He felt like he was on the brink of something, as if an exciting possibility was opening up for him. 

He went about his day with a bit of a spring in his step, though most citizens of Storybrooke would be pressed to notice. It was only when he saw the book on gardening he was due to return to the library that afternoon- his two Moth orchids had developed small water-soaked spots on the leaves and he had wanted to consult some verified sources instead of relying exclusively on Google search results- that his mood dampened somewhat. As nice as last night had been- bloody fantastic rather- it did make him sad, somewhat, to give up his crush on Belle French. However unattainable it was still nice to have it, that bit of feeling that did not need to be reciprocated to be real. It had been nice to feel something for someone for a change, to look forward to each smile and each small conversation. But it wouldn’t be right, and what he had now was more valuable in any case. Perhaps, with time, he would grow out of his infatuation with the librarian and they could be friends. That would be rather lovely.

He crossed the street towards the library around three o’clock, wanting to beat the rush caused by children being let off school, a busy time for one of the only kid-friendly places in Storybrooke. There were some patrons about, and the afternoon light made the library look truly beautiful. Miss French truly worked miracles with her limited budget.

He found her easily, shelving a few books in the poetry section, and tried not to preen when she smiled widely at him.

“Mr Gold, hi! Always a pleasure. Here to return a book?”

The librarian was always sunny and welcoming, but she looked even happier that day, an excited sort of energy practically rolling off of her in waves. Thank goodness he had decided to give up on his silly little crush, otherwise he might have buckled under the power of her brightness. 

“Yes. And you look particularly happy today, Miss French, if I might say so.”

The librarian smiled even more, if possible, and leaned close, as if to tell him a secret.

“I have a date tonight.”

It hurt, the slightest bit, the shock making him take a step back, but less than it would have yesterday. And perhaps, he reasoned, this would be good. This would put them both in the path of becoming friends, allowing him to leave his crush behind much faster. He forced himself to enquire politely after the lucky man, listening as she talked about someone she had been flirting with for a long time now, and it seemed like the relationship was finally ready for the next step.

“I’m really happy. And very nervous. It feels like such a risk, after all this time building something that could easily fizzle out with a first date. But I’ve always believed in doing the brave thing, and bravery will follow. It’s what my mother always said.”

She had turned back to shelve a book as she finished the last sentence, so thankfully she did not see his jaw drop and his eyes widen, his surprise so visible no one could’ve missed it. His heart lurched in his chest, sheer and sudden panic making it difficult to breathe. Fuck. Fuck. It wasn’t possible. Belle was Beauty. Belle was Beauty. He tried to contradict the notion in his head but he had known Beauty’s British accent was passable but fake, and it made sense for him not to have identified her voice when she usually spoke with her natural Australian drawl, something he associated so closely with her. Everything else he had ever found out about Beauty, in and out of the D&D setting, coincided with what he knew, or thought he knew, about the librarian, one of the reasons why he had developed a crush on her in the first place.

The initial shock was followed by a spike of elation and then a sinking feeling of dread. He needed to cancel. She would be disappointed, but more disappointed if he didn’t and she realised her crush was a man a good deal older than her that was known for being the town monster. It would be awkward and she would not be able to escape him after it, both doomed to meet each other often, given the small size of the town. He could not put her through that.

He stopped himself then, noticing the familiar dark turn of his thoughts, dipped in so much self-loathing it was almost stifling. And he wondered if he really was thinking about Belle or about himself. Being a coward, taking the easy way out. He thought about how he had woken up, the world full of promise and the future bright with the possibility of something great on the horizon. And how he had felt brave last night, to leap into something that had been so worth it. Perhaps it was time to be brave more often. Do something, however small. Put the ball in her court, somehow.

“I wish you the best of luck, then. Perhaps some other time, if you’re not too busy, you could pop into my shop. I have a few antique books I feel you would appreciate.”

It was a nice recovery, and he was happy to see her smile, apparently welcoming the proposition. Everyone knew Mr Gold’s shop was only to be entered when making deals. He didn’t really allow idle perusal of his stock and no one had the money or interest to buy his antiques. His business was conducted mostly with people from major cities on the East Coast.

“Wow, an open invitation to traipse into Mr Gold’s shop, that’s not something one sees everyday. What do you want in return? I hear only deals can grant you access to the shop.”

She made sure to make it clear she was joking, something he appreciated. Feeling emboldened by her kind gesture he adopted a slightly higher pitch and replied:

“Oh, nothing much. Companionship, perhaps a game of chess, some good wine, conversation and the like.”

Being close enough he got to see as it dawned on her, as her brain quickly processed what he had said and where she had heard it before. And he knew, knew because of the way she looked at him, as if she did not recognise him, as if he was a brand new person to her, that she understood the implication, what he had meant to tell her without actually telling her. 

“Hope to see you soon, then. Good luck with the date.”

He turned around before he could second-guess himself, feeling terrified by what he had exposed but satisfied at the same time. This way it was Belle’s choice to show up. For all she knew he had no idea that she was Beauty. She could make up an excuse and simply not meet her, and their worlds would never merge. If she did not want to pursue anything between them all she had to do is cancel the date, or not show up. He would respect her decision and never push for anything, or acknowledge their online relationship in the real world.

He sent her an email just as he was about to get into his car, letting her know that he understood that this meeting was a bit of a risk and he would understand if she backed out at the last minute. There were other things he could do in Boston, and he was not adverse to having dinner by himself. And they could still be friends, no matter what she decided. He was halfway to Boston when he heard his cell phone ping, letting him know he had a new email. As he expected, it was from Beauty:

“I’m on my way. Can’t wait to meet you! See you soon.”

He smiled.

[x0401x]

Given Movie: Animate Times Interview

Interviewing Nakazawa Masatomo-san, Eguchi Takuya-san and Asanuma Shintarou-san | What is this “being in love with someone irreplaceable” thing that the three of them talk about?

“I used to think that love was something softer, sweeter, gentler.”

“I like him so, so much that I can’t help myself – I want to stay close to him... but it’s painful.”

There is no mistaking that such bitter and heated love will make your chest tighten in “Given the Movie”, which was finally released on August 22nd (Saturday). The TV anime that aired from July to September 2019 was about the romance of the high school members of the band, Uemoyama Ritsuka and Satou Mafuyu, but this time, the one being depicted is the heartrending love between the adult members, Nakayama Haruki and Kaji Akihiko, plus Murata Ugetsu.

Thus, we have carried out an interview with the voice of Nakayama Haruki, Nakazawa Masatomo-san, the voice of Kaji Akihiko, Eguchi Takuya-san, and the voice of Murata Ugetsu, Asanuma Shintarou-san. What did these three people from the casting feel in regards to this “adult romance” of falling in love with someone irreplaceable...?

The character named Ugetsu, whom he made sure not to play too theatrically.

——Firstly, tell us your impressions when you read the script and the new appeal of the characters.

Voice of Murata Ugetsu, Asanuma Shintarou (henceforth “Asanuma”): Ugetsu didn’t show up much in the TV series, but despite having few appearances, there were key scenes where one could get a glimpse at what kind of person he is.

It’s because Ugetsu is a genius that he’s indifferent to anything other than music and people presume upon him, like, “If this person says so, then I guess it can’t be helped”. Sometimes, although he says harsh things aloud, he actually really appreciates the other person deep down.

The TV anime portrayed him as feeling sympathy towards Mafuyu and having interest in him, but when I read the script of this movie, I sensed that Ugetsu was pulled in even further by Mafuyu’s charm. As Ugetsu met Mafuyu, I feel that, during the parts where he had a frank talk with Mafuyu and spilled onto him the honest feelings that he absolutely could never tell Akihiko, the two geniuses took one more step forward at being drawn to each other.

It’s exactly because they’re similar that a side of Ugetsu that he doesn’t show to other people incidentally ends up coming to light. I felt once again that Mafuyu has a mysterious power, which enables others to be sincere.

——This one is about a painful romance between three people, including Ugetsu, but what was your impression of this work in regards to “Given”?

Asanuma: Ever since the TV series, I felt it was a show that portrayed the most detailed parts of human emotions very sensibly. There’s also the fact that it’s my first time taking part in a BL work, so I thought a lot about how to perform.

——Ugetsu in particular has a delicate heart and spirit unique of a genius, so I believe you must have had to be very cautious in terms of acting.

Asanuma: That’s right. I was very careful not to be too theatrical. It’s exactly because he’s portrayed so sensibly that, if I wound up being too theatrical, this meticulousness might have turned out purposeful.

——Next, Nakazawa-san, please.

Voice of Nakayama Haruki, Nakazawa Masatomo-san (henceforth, “Nakazawa”): In the TV series, the character I played, Haruki, had been thinking, together with Akihiko as the supporters of the high school duo, about what to do for the band to succeed, from a point of view that was different from Akihiko’s. It felt like Akihiko would cause the action to happen by using a detonator and make good things out of it, but in Haruki’s case, he would conduct himself calmly, making sure that everyone would be able to do things as freely as possible.

The dealing methods and ways of thinking unique of these two were present in the TV anime, but I think that after experiencing the live concert of “Fuyu no Hanashi”, everyone in the adult group was influenced by it and a change happened, as Haruki began to feel his own loneliness very keenly. Moreover, he watched Mafuyu, who at first had no idea how to play a guitar at all, blossoming his musical talent and steadily learning the ropes, so he started having a complex about being an extremely ordinary and average person.

The things that were under the surface until then began to appear on his face, and there was a part where one can get a glimpse that Haruki also feels these kinds of things. Until now, Haruki had been doing his best to conceal his feelings for Akihiko so that they wouldn’t show... still, they were clear as day (laughs).

All: (Laugh).

Nakazawa: In that sense, there are also feelings that end up being conveyed without words, and I think this can be said not just for Haruki and Akihiko’s relationship but also Akihiko and Ugetsu’s.

There are things that get conveyed even if you don’t put them into words, and also things that are conveyed for the very first time when you use words. I felt this part of it a lot in the script when I read it.

——Eguchi-san, what did you think when you read the script?

Voice of Kaji Akihiko, Eguchi Takuya (henceforth, “Eguchi”): This is a part of the story where the feelings of the adult members speed up and their hearts start moving, so I myself was looking forward to it as well. When I read the script, of course, I found that there was a big number of lines for each of us.

In Akihiko’s case, you can see parts of himself that weren’t shown in the TV series, so I began from destroying the sculpture of him that the TV anime had cemented. There were the usual monologues and narrations in the script, and at the recordings, I discussed with the direction the balance of up to what point they would be monologues and what point they would be narrations. In that sense, I was able to have all sorts of fun and do all sorts of tricks, so it felt worth it.

——About the point of breaking the sculpture of Akihiko in order to show a new side of him, was there any “fear” in that?

Eguchi: In the end, when I was told that I shouldn’t throw in the things I had thought out, I could only accept it with a “yes” (laughs).

Nakazawa & Asanuma: (Laugh).

Eguchi: But this team drew out the wish to give it a try and made me want to create good things together with them, so I trusted the people around me and managed to take on challenge with a “guess I’ll tackle that one”.

——Was there anything about Akihiko’s appeal that you were able to feel anew?

Eguchi: There were parts where I thought, “He was that compassionate!?”. Akihiko gives off quite the cool vibes, so I was wondering, “Where would the things that move his heart be?”. I thought he just couldn’t take a step forward because he was scared of changing the “now”.

But the movie did the work of making him properly face many things and rethink over something that seems to be his true intentions, so in a way, it put an end to them. A realistic part of him came to light. Until now, we were able to get glimpses of childishness in his adult side, but in the movie, this childishness appears in a realistic manner.

The romance of the adult trio, in which countless types of “like” are mixed up in complicated ways.

——The TV anime portrayed the light romance of the high schoolers, but this movie is about the painful love of the adult trio. Regarding the point of “falling for someone that can’t be replaced”, what did you feel that the adult trio’s romance was?

Eguchi: I think “falling for someone irreplaceable” is the same for any kind of romantic love.

Asanuma: Indeed.

Eguchi: I believe it’s exactly because no one can be replaced that there are things we won’t understand unless we try to face them. I think, if your love was requited and you became lovers, dating each other isn’t the goal and that life is about discussing it with each other so that it will become something certain.

I feel like the adult trio took this decision too. They muster out their true feelings after they start facing each other, but in contrast, it’s exactly because those are their true feelings that they didn’t come out before. There were things about this conflict that I felt empathy for.

Asanuma: There are things you end up realizing through your accumulated experiences precisely because you’re an adult. This is linked, for example, to inferiority complexes and to the feeling of not wanting to get in the other person’s way.

Nakazawa: It’s also something slightly different from kindness.

Asanuma: You might just be scared of what you’ve come to know, but things such as withdrawing yourself due to loving the other person too much aren’t something that you’d even think about when you were a grade schooler (laughs).

Nakazawa: True (laughs).

Asanuma: There are many sorts of “like” out there, which surge in complicated ways.

Nakazawa: I also think that being able to break up properly is one of the final forms of adult love. That not clashing each other’s opinions by going, “I can’t deal with you anymore” and breaking up, but instead putting each other’s circumstances side-by-side and concluding that “it might be better for us not to be together anymore” is a form of love.

I believe that if you arrive to a different answer, such as, “Then, how about we live together this way?” after learning about each other’s situation, that in itself is also adult love. Unlike the kind of romance where you simply convey the feeling of liking someone, the things you have to rethink about in order to realize the thought that “we can’t live together”, which lies beyond being in love with each other, are what adult love is.

Asanuma: Haruki, Akihiko and Ugetsu are called the “adult trio” but they’re not adults at all.

Nakazawa: That’s right. There’s a part of them that finally grows up after the movie.

Asanuma: Additionally, there’s the “unconditional love”, which you don’t learn unless you grow up. Even I, who am in my 40’s, haven’t found my way to an unconditional love yet.

Eguchi: Unconditional love is difficult...

Asanuma: It might be a form of love that won’t happen unless it’s between parent and children or towards pets.

Eguchi: We actually have no idea what our pets are thinking, but we’re like, “I’m taking care of them so I guess that’s okay”.

Nakazawa: We might get really sad if we knew what pets truly think (laughs). Maybe they wouldn’t say anything other than “Food! Food!” (laughs).

Asanuma: If it were just that, it’d still be okay! They might think it would’ve been better if a different family had bought them (laughs).

Eguchi: Ahahahaha.

Nakazawa: That would be so painful~ (laughs). In Akihiko and Ugetsu’s case, supposing there was nothing left undone between them, both of them had music, which might have become the reason why things turned sour, I think. Even when you take the other person’s wellbeing into consideration, you can’t bring yourself to step back at all.

Asanuma: We often hear that “rather than thinking, ‘This person is my inspiration!’, the feeling of being able to respect the person’s essence is more important”, but Akihiko and Ugetsu weren’t doing well at all even though they respect each other.

Eguchi: That’s the difficult part. There might be something like... “the more you respect each other, the worse it gets”.

Asanuma: There’s that too, which is why I think no one can give the correct answer regarding the right way to begin a romantic relationship.

Eguchi: At the end of the day, there are things we can’t say exactly because we are close to the other person, even though we like them. There are also words that people don’t or can’t say when there’s distance between them.

Maybe it would have turned into a different relationship if said words had been conveyed, but... I guess the real deal is when there are words that don’t come out exactly because of that. Thinking this way, I believe that human beings are truly complicated.

Asanuma: We’re indeed complicated, so I’ve decided that I’ll definitely be a dog if I ever reincarnate (laughs).

All: (Laugh).

Asanuma-san, who clads himself in the air of a genius, Nakazawa-san, who is tolerance incarnate, and Eguchi-san, who gives off a sense of security.

——Please tell us what each of you felt through this movie, in terms of acting and whatnot, as part of the cast.

Nakazawa: (Looking at Asanuma-san) He has a silent intensity.

Asanuma: Eh!? I don’t~!

Nakazawa: When he’s playing Ugetsu, he has a sense of presence and I feel a quiet pressure from him.

Eguchi: Asanuma-san is far too skilled at putting on the air of a genius.

Asanuma: It’s just “putting on”, though, right? I can quickly take it off (laughs).

All: (Laugh).

Eguchi: That’s what being a pro is. “The way he clads himself in the air of a genius is genius!” is what I thought. Your splendid push-and-pull acting is just wonderful.

Asanuma: Really!? I have this thing where I try to explain everything with my voice no matter what. Before, in a different recording, the sound director told me, “The animation is already doing the explanations, so you don’t have to try to explain it with your voice so much”.

That’s exactly why I make sure not to be too theatrical with characters such as Ugetsu, for the subtleties of their emotions are extremely detailed, and was all the more conscious of not trying to make it seem special, since this is a love pattern that can be found anywhere.

——In your eyes, Asanuma-san, what is Nakazawa-san’s appeal?

Asanuma: Nakazawa-san is tolerance incarnate.

Nakazawa: Thank you very much (laughs).

Asanuma: This tolerance of his is Haruki entirely.

Eguchi: He gives of a superb mom vibe. Same in the recordings.

——Even in the short time span of this interview, Nakazawa-san has been transmitting an air of calmness.

Eguchi: Nakazawa-san himself is soft, like, you can feel the tolerance from him.

Asanuma: Nakazawa-san might disagree with this, but “looking troubled” suits him.

Nakazawa: I disagree~! (Laughs).

Eguchi: Ahahahaha.

Asanuma: So it feels like there are people around him who want to try and give him trouble (laughs).

Nakazawa: This rings a bell with one person. Someone named Tamaru Atsushi (laughs).

All: (Laugh).

——Then, Haruki is the perfect role for Nakazawa-san!

Nakazawa: That’s right. I myself basically accept any one and any kind of comment.

Asanuma: But you have to let it out every now and then, y’know?

Nakazawa: Yes. I vent every so often.

——From Nakazawa-san’s viewpoint, what is Eguchi-san’s appeal as the voice of Akihiko?

Nakazawa: (Looking at Eguchi-san) He has a fine sharpness.

Asanuma: That’s like the appeal of a beer (laugh).

All: (Laugh).

Nakazawa: His low-pitched voice gives off an imposing impression, but his acting is extremely sharp. There’s a decisive fineness to him as he gives birth to a detonator within Given and tries to set a little fire to anything that seems inflammable. He also firmly takes ahold of the essential points while performing as-is, so it draws out our motivation and gives off a sense of trust.

——Asanuma-san, what about you?

Asanuma: He (Eguchi-san) gives me a sense of security. Ah, not because his body is big, okay?

Eguchi: (Laughs).

Asanuma: He feels like a spiritual bodyguard. “Given” was my first participation in a BL series, but when I was told that “the other party is Eguchi-kun”, I thought, “Ah, it’s going to be okay.”

——Ooh!

Nakazawa: In contrast, I thought, “Is it really okay to be me?” (laughs).

Eguchi: Ahahahaha.

Asanuma: To me, Nakazawa-san is tolerance and Eguchi-kun is security.

[writingonesdreams]

Sortinghatchats - The Bold Type

Check out @sortinghatchats and @wisteria-lodge for explanation of the system. Spoilers ahead.

I get the impression Bold Type is a very lion centric show. Its characters are constantly looking for causes, for ways to make the world a better place, to find agendas and make a point through whatever means at their disposal.

Kat seems like the easiest to sort. She is bold, unapologetic, she runs against the door and any obstacle with a lion determination, and has to be alerted to her methods being inconsiderate or even painful for others. When she thinks something is right, she is going to speak up and rage against it, no matter the personal cost to herself. She gets fired from her beloved job because she wants to make a superior pay for supporting hate groups. She goes on a rampage promoting man nipples when Instagram forbids her from making pictures of women breasts. Becoming an activist in the later seasons also reflects this. A lion primary with a cause and with lion secondary ways in how she treats problems, barges through people, and responds to her emotions. Kat can't help but say exactly what she means and feels. Rather telling Adena she is attracted to other girls than keeping it secret to spare her feelings, telling Sutton exactly what she thinks about her safe high paying job that's boring as heck, beating a guy up who insults Adena during their date. A screaming improvising lion to boot. Though she does adopt some snake ways along the way, getting creative and using different angles to get out of tricky situation, like when she finds a way to fulfill her contract to Whole Spa by promoting their products on instagram while calling them out on being racist in the same video.

Jane is a bit harder to sort, since it's her methods that are the most obvious about her character. Jane makes lists of pros and cons. She makes meticulous research for her reporter job and she loves it. Relying on facts, checking over that everything fits, observing situations. Writing for her is a assemble of tools, ways to approach a topic right. She is a clear bird secondary. While all three girls are characteristics for putting their friendship above all else - from romantic interests to jobs - Jane is as much as an cause fighter as Kat. She looks for stories to help people, especially women. She writes her Failing Feminist vertical to help vulnerable women, to tell their stories, to bring down abusive bosses, to raise awareness. Obsessing over politics and higher meanings for her articles from the early season 1, when she starts to get comfortable and confident enough in her position and talent as a writer, she enjoys taking on the challenge of difficult topics. It fires her up. Loyalty and appreciation to Jacqueline, she sees as a mother figure nor to the magazine Scarlet itself that rised her up, stop her from going after more lucrative job for herself in Incite, not realizing how important team and work environment are. When she gets invested in a story, she won't let go just cause it's uncomfortable for her sources or even to people she loves, like Jacqueline. Her relationship with Ryan is based on attraction and similarities as writers, and she doesn't mind starting with sex only, but she breaks up with him the first time, because him hooking up with others girls (which was their mutual deal) doesn't match what she wants from a relationship, wanting loyalty and love for herself. They break up again in season 4, not because Ryan cheated on her, but because he couldn't fess up, when honesty and telling hard truths is Jane's motto and credo in life and she wants a person that values it the same. A lion bird from what I can see.

Sutton might be the hardest to sort. She doesn't have a cause to follow per se, she follows her dream job in fashion, which however counts for lions. It's a hard bumpy journey to decide to pursue it though, working her ass off to keep it and be promoted, to do what she does and loves best and then to find her way in it. Sutton almost doesn't let herself think about it, needing money, trying to be practical. But she is so sad about it. She stifles her own feelings and desires in order to survive in the society she can't rely on because of her drunk mom and hard childhood. When she does come into herself at the beginning of the first season, she thrives. She glows, sparkles, finds her confidence. While being plagued by insecurities if she is enough the whole series, she truly and beautifully shines when doing what she loves in fashion, when she goes after her goals. Sutton is independent, and breaks up with the love of her life, Richard, several times because he poses a risk to her career and reputation. She won't let him pay for her and help her just cause he is 15 years older wealthy suitor, which gets on his nerves. And she chooses to be always honest about her feelings no matter how uncomfortable they are to hear to him, like when she tells him she won't move with him to San Francisco, because of her promotion and she doesn't want kids, because she loves her life dedicated to her job as it is. Sutton isn't people driven, so neither snake or badger, so her cause could be considered her dream and love for fashion, a lion primary. But her secondary looks like a badger to me. Sutton is a charming. She can befriend anyone, put models at ease, call out bad behaviour with diplomatic nuance. To get Oliver's trust she works harder than anyone, looking for ways to help and please. Integrity and showing up are her get go ways to approach problems and challneges.

The lion primary all three share would explain how they get along so well. As mentioned before, no matter their causes or dreams, these friends put everything on the line for each other. They understand and support each other, because they just get where each is coming from, they are proud at each other's fights for the purpose, for improvement, and they call each other out on judgemental or emotional choices. Their bond even shows how strong friendships can be for lions - just cause they aren't loyalists doesn't mean they can't be dedicated and loving to each other, while going after their own things. It reminds me of what @nectargrapes said about lion love yesterday in her posts.

That's my reading, feel free to suggest or discuss any improvements to the sortings if I'm reading them wrong.

Kat - lion lion

Jane - lion bird

Sutton - lion badger

[ezwhump]

Let the Cat Out of the Bag - pet whump, pet-sitting, pampered pet, introduction of characters 

“Explain it to me again.”

“Aw, fuck off, Farhan.”

“No, seriously!” Farhan spat a seed shell into the solo cup and  took another swig of his beer. “This woman puts an ad in the fucking paper, for christ’s sake, asking for someone to what? Look after her kitty cat?”

He buckled over, eyes creasing, and barked out a laugh. 

“No you got that exactly right, man,” Gregor let his mouthful of warm beer dribble back into the bottle and set it down on the table. “She’s got some sorta terminal illness, says she won’t be home enough to look after it, yeah? That’s where I come in.” 

Farhan snorted and rolled his eyes. “Yeah but she could just sell it though. Get some dough before she croaks.” He leaned over and snatched the paper off the table. “Pet-sitting. Fucking hell. I can loan you the money, you know.” 

When Farhan got serious he got fancy, started picking up his ‘t’s, shortening his vowels. Offering money. It made Gregor raise his hackles. 

“When you think about it, it's not a bad gig. I get to fuck around in some OAP’s house all day and I get paid for it. If I do a decent enough job maybe I get in on the will.”

Farhan shook his head, flipping to the sports section of the paper. “You’re a fuckin’ vulture, man.”

Gregor smiled to himself and drank his warm beer anyway. Farhan didn’t really understand, it didn’t matter what the job was, it mattered what the pay was. And he’d do pretty much anything at this point (except become Farhan’s charity case), so long as food got put on the table and the bills were paid, even looking after some geriatric’s pet. 

Even if he was allergic to cats. 

--

The car pulled up a few streets away from the old lady’s, and Gregor opened the passenger door. 

Farhan leaned over and rolled down the window. “You got your cell?”

Gregor patted his jean’s back pocket. 

“Right, good. Wallet, keys?”

“Fuck off, Farhan.” Gregor was getting irate, jumping on the spot with his hands in his front pockets. It was too fucking cold outside for chit-chat, he wanted to get into the warm house and start eating. 

Farhan laughed and cranked up the window with a “right, right”. 

The house was in a cul-de-sac of luxury townhomes, redbrick with intricate railings and a courtyard with a fountain. Gregor was suddenly very aware of his ratty sneakers and DIY buzzcut. He spat into the bushes and rang the doorbell, stopping short of shouting up to the closest window. It seemed like the sort of place where people would stop and stare if you spoke too loudly, and god forbid he caused a kerfuffle and the police were called. 

He patted his pocket for his dab pen and rolled it between his thumb and finger while he waited to be buzzed in. 

“Katz residence.” 

Gregor jumped and turned to the intercom speaker on the side of the doorway. He pressed the little purple button. 

“Uh, hi. It's Gregor. Enache. I’m here for the pet-sitting gi- job.” 

He waited for a moment, wind whipping inside his jacket and making him shudder. Then the intercom buzzed and he heard a lock click, so he took his cue and went inside. 

After processing the excessive grandeur of the lobby, Gregor took the elevator up to the top floor. All the hallways were cream with soft white lights in sconces and glittering from chandeliers. The floors were marble, and Gregor almost laughed when his soles squeaked and tracked dirt if he scraped them hard enough. 

There was a soft tinkling music coming from somewhere and all the doors were painted a deep plum colour with gold handles. The whole place smelled like sweet perfume. Part of Gregor wanted to break everything just to check if it was real (especially the little statues on the antique tables), part of him wanted this whole place to be preserved in resin so he could stare at it forever, but he mostly just wanted to see if there were price listings for any of it. The pawn potential made him lightheaded. 

“She’s gonna pay you,” he reminded himself, stopping at door 19 and rapping the golden knocker. It was shaped like a cat. 

  A boy answered the door. Well, not really a boy, though he seemed younger. He looked around Gregor’s age, 22 or so, but they were leagues apart. 

He had pearl-blonde hair that stopped at the base of his throat and his lanky frame was a little taller than Gregor. He was wearing a long-sleeve shirt and slacks made out of the same muslin fabric, but his feet were bare and clean. 

“Pleased to meet you Mr. Enache.” A woman’s voice called out from the guy who stepped aside silently to let Gregor in. 

Salma Katz was sitting on a white lounge sofa in a skirt and blouse, her legs crossed at the ankles. She wasn’t geriatric by any stretch of the imagination but she did have an air of vulnerability around her, like something was wrong and she was using every vice at her disposal to hide it. It showed in the way she picked at her nails or kept tucking back her blonde bob. 

“Hi.” Gregor stood dumbly in the entryway, eyes darting to all of the fanciful objects littered about the place. Little markings of money, of privilege. He felt sort of trapped. “Um, so where is the little guy?”

Salma was blinking sluggishly, and Gregor couldn’t help but compare it to when his mom had gotten hold of Farhan’s Vicodin after his dental surgery last month. Hazy, drugged up. It was probably painkillers or something. 

“There are a few things I should go over before I leave, but just in case there’s a list on the refrigerator.” She gestured for Gregor to sit and he did, slumping into the love-seat across from her, a glass coffee table between them with a small vase of peach roses in the middle of it. 

“I’m very invested in the comfort and safety of my pet while I’m enjoying treatment, and thus very meticulous. . . about who watches him.” The boy had taken a seat on the floor in front of her lounge chair, and Gregor had to drag his eyes back to Salma. 

“Right. Well, I mean, why put it in the paper then? Any dickwad off the street could come in.” A humoured smile lit up her face, and Gregor caught himself. “Uh, with all due respect, ma’am.”

Salma laughed, an airy, unbothered sound. “Well, just prove to me that I made the correct choice young man, and we won’t have a problem.” Her eyes trailed Gregor up and down and he tried not to squirm, setting his jaw and meeting her eyes. They glinted. “Now, Leander has a particular diet which I included on the list. I presume you can cook?”

Gregor nodded. He’d had to learn a long time ago. 

“Wonderful. Taking him outside the apartment is discouraged, however we do have a balcony if you’ll be needing to smoke or he needs fresh air. He takes a bath most nights, and you’ll know what to wash him with. Oh, and of course if you need anything from him all you need to do is ask.” 

“It’s trained?” Gregor felt his eyes widen, impressed. Cat’s weren’t usually trained, but he should’ve figured given the context of the whole situation. 

“Indeed he is. Now, I wouldn’t want him to get lonely, either. He has his own room but he does enjoy company. Would you be available to watch him five days a week?”

Gregor thought for a moment and nodded. He’d cover his bases, pay his dues, on the weekend. And besides, pets didn’t really require all that much effort. 

“Perfect. Does 7-12 feel appropriate? Of course we’d provide you with adequate food, a bed, transport, and whatever else you require to perform your duties.” She was talking slowly, like she was trying to coerce a wild animal into a cage, but Gregor wasn’t going to complain. Living in a place like this all day, free food, a fucking car, and all he had to do was refill a food bowl and wrestle it into a bath sometimes? He felt like he’d stumbled upon a get-out-of-jail-free card. 

“Sure, no problem.”

Salma smiled again and smoothed her hand along the boy’s hair, standing up and gesturing for Gregor to do so as well. Gregor tried to keep the incredulity from showing on his face. 

She reached out and took Gregor’s hand, clasping it briefly and then turning back to the boy. Gregor looked around again for a tabby, a persian. A fucking tiger. 

Salma ushered the boy forward, and he stood graceful and silent in front of Gregor, avoiding eye contact. 

“Mr. Enache, this is Leander. My pet.”

--- 

I’m taking a short break from Russ & Lennon, but hopefully you guys will enjoy reading about Gregor & Leander as much as I enjoy writing them :) I’m starting up a new tag list for these two so if you’d like to be included pls just let me know! <3 - ez 

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tag list: __