#i KNOW this is so so late i got hit by a wave of insomnia and couldn't write properly

[im-not-corrupted]

Very well! XD Since four has been done how about...12

Now, that I can do!

----

Waking up to his lover's face is something Hob Gadling wouldn't trade the world for, truly.

It's mid-afternoon when he does. The afternoon sun bathes the room in gold through a sliver in the curtains. He hadn't closed them properly the night before, but they were...otherwise occupied, in his defence. And his lover, Morpheus, still sleeps soundly beside him.

He's cute while he sleeps. He'd deny any comment about being cute instantly, of course—he prefers Hob to call him pretty or gorgeous, and Hob is more than happy to pile those compliments high. They are true, after all, and he believes his lover should know just how highly Hob thinks of him, even after twenty years of being in a relationship, and six hundred odd years of acquaintanceship before that.

The compliments never get old, not really. Morpheus preens every time Hob says something and feeds his still-intact arrogance and pride—he never really needed to be Endless for either of those things, not really. Hob loves that about him. Loves the slightly arrogant tilt to his chin, how regally he holds himself even if there isn't a crown upon his head anymore. (If he's telling the truth, he loves everything about Morpheus. There's not a single thing about him that Hob dislikes. They've had their moments, of course. Their frustrations. But they work through it, always, even when Morpheus is half convinced their spats are the end of the world, melodramatic bastard that he is. (Hob loves that, too.))

Cute, though, is the one that pops into his mind now as he gazes at his dozing lover. His hair is a worse mess than usual, a proper bird's nest, haloing his head where it rests on his pillow. He looks relaxed, in a way he rarely ever does during his waking hours. Even without the burden of Endlessness upon his shoulders, there is still a lot in his head.

It is easier now. He has had twenty years of being human to adjust to all of its messiness. Morpheus has told him, in the quiet of night—A time of confession, he'd mused at one point, and Hob does agree that there's something about the darkness of night time that makes being seen a little bit easier—that he aches less, these days. It is still there, and he has episodes where it aches so much more than usual, but they are easier to deal with.

Hob is glad for that. Glad his lover didn't take the easier way out. He thinks about it, sometimes, about how close he came to losing him—the thought catches him in its grasp, sometimes. Brings tears to his eyes. He does not like to imagine a world without his dearest friend.

He is glad that he never had to face that, not really. Instead, he gets this—soft, golden-lit mornings on Valentine's day, in which his lover continues to sleep and Hob gets to bask in the glory of having a love like this.

He does have plans for today, and he already woke up later than he would've liked. It is that thought that leads him to brush his lips against Morpheus's cheekbone in a gentle kiss, murmuring his name softly.

His lover doesn't sleep all that deeply. He dreams sometimes. There used to be nightmares, earlier on, that woke him in the middle of the night. He still has them sometimes, but they are rare. Occasional.

It's easy to wake him. He only needs to say his lover's name a little bit louder than he did the first time before Morpheus begins to stir slightly, and Hob smiles down at him with a soft, "Good morning, love."

Morpheus blinks up at him blearily. It takes him a moment to catch his bearings, but when he does, a smile splits across his face. It's soft, loving, and Hob loves the sight like he loves that of the rising sun at dawn. "Hello, lover," he murmurs, his voice raspy, still clinging onto sleep with some degree of determination. And then he blinks, seeming to recall something, before he moves to cup Hob's face with the palm of his hand. The band of his wedding wing is cold against Hob's skin. "And. Happy Valentine's Day, if I recall correctly."

"You do," Hob replies. He turns his head slightly, presses a kiss to the inside of Morpheus's wrist. "Happy Valentine's Day to you too, my love."

Immortality is great, truly.

Hob has never regretted a moment of it, not really. There have been moments, of course—the 1600s weren't great for him, and immortality didn't quite seem worth it when he spent practically every day for eighty years tired, hungry and so terribly cold. It never got bad enough for him to consider giving up—Hob didn't know what would be bad enough to make him consider that, not really—but despair was a familiar companion those years, and it was hard to find a reason to continue waking up every morning.

It got easier, just as it always does. If immortality taught Hob Gadling one thing, it would be this: there is very little in this world that lasts forever, and bad times aren't on that list. There is too much time for everything to remain the same in a world that is ever-changing, and no amount of bad times will make that any different.

Still, there are some downfalls to immortality. These downfalls will never be enough to make him ask for death. If he can live through the 1600s and come out of that with hope, then he knows he will only ever want to live.

One of those downfalls is the lack of constancy. Hob Gadling is immortal, but the rest of the world around him...is not. The rest of the world around him has a life span that lasts however many decades, and at the end of that, Hob still lives.

He does not regret that he does, but God's wounds, it does hurt. It is terribly lonely, sometimes, to be the only person left after everything. Friendships, relationships—they can't last, and it aches.

There is one constancy, though. Morpheus. He has been there since 1389. In the grand scheme of things, that is practically the beginning of his rather long life, and though they only saw each other once every hundred years, it was enough. More than enough, really.

He could never get tired of this. Of loving Morpheus, of getting to be with him. Even after celebrating so many Valentine's days with this man, he thinks he still wouldn't get tired of it.

"I assume you have plans for today, my love," Morpheus prompts.

"Mhm, I do." Despite his words, though, he allows himself to lay back down next to his lover, to pull him close. "But we can lay here a little longer. I'd like to hold you for a bit."

His lover nuzzles closer, letting out a soft, pleased noise. "I wouldn't dare complain about that," he agrees.

Hob places a gentle kiss upon his forehead. Yes, he will never tire of this, no matter how many times they get to do this during their immortal lives.

[festivalsofmargot]

Hi!! I love your imagines so much!! And I had a request if possible! Maybe f!reader and Sebastian sneak into the prefect bathroom for a bath together after a long day or something and one thing leaders to another..

My Sleep Remedy

{Sebastian Sallow x Fem!Reader}

AGED UP CHARACTERS, 18+ SCENARIOS (Characters are nearing the end of their 7th year and are 18+)

Word Count: ~ 5,100 words

Warnings: 18+ smut, (first time having sex, fingering, handjob, oral)

Author’s Note: Just want to say right away that I’m not a lore master on Harry Potter, I’ve only read the first book, seen the movies, and obsessed over Hogwarts Legacy. I think you need a password to get into the prefects’ bathroom but I’m going by HL rules where you can just walk in lmfaooo. Thank you for the request, anon!!! I got really into this one and had so much fun writing it. Hopefully you guys have as much fun reading it ❤ Now kick back and turn off your brain. I cleared your schedule for you, enjoy 🥰

Songs (if interested):

Spiracle - Flower Face

snowfall (Slowed + Reverb) -  Øneheart, reidenshi

You’d think, after everything you had to do to catch up having come in late as a 7th year, you’d be out as soon as your head hit the pillow. Yet sleep still found a way to evade you. After tossing and turning with no signs of your eyelids growing heavier, you decided to sneak out of your dorm and wander the halls of Hogwarts once again. Maybe you could stumble upon some demiguise statues for Mr. Moon.

With the disillusionment spell coating you, you walked the halls easily, taking in all the paintings and statues. It was a shame you only had one year here, there was no way you could see the entirety of the castle in such a short time. Turning a corner, you rammed into a solid, invisible object.

The feel of hands steadied you as your rubbed at your nose. The disillusionment spell wore off for both you and Sebastian Sallow.

“Sebastian.” You said in pleasant surprise, smiling up at him. “What are you doing up?”

“Had trouble sleeping. Decided to follow your lead and go on one of these -” He waved his hand dismissively in the air, “night walks you rave so much about.” He chuckled, keeping his voice low. Of everyone he could have had insomnia with, he was happy it was you.

“Same here. Decided I might as well look for more of those demiguise statues. No idea why they bother Mr. Moon so much, I think they’re pretty adorable. Care to join me? Or did you want to be alone?”

He appreciated you asking, especially in such a way that he felt he could say ‘no’ if he needed. But he didn’t need to, or want to. “Count me in.” He smiled. “I think I spotted one in the prefects’ bathroom.”

You quirked a brow at him. “What were you doing in there?”

“Bathing, what else?”

“One of the prefects invited you to join them, did they?” You teased and he rolled his eyes, playfully shoving your shoulder.

“It’s my last year, so I figured ‘why not’? Wanted to try it at least once. And if I was caught, I’m sure people would have been happy I've moved on from the restricted section. Now come on.”

“Lead the way.”

-

You and Sebastian arrived at the prefects’ bathroom, cloaked in the disillusionment spell. “If I remember right, I think I saw it just over...” His eyes scanned the bathroom.

“Ah, there it is.” You strode up to it, your disillusionment spell fading. You picked it up and twirled it in your hand as you returned to Sebastian’s side. “One more down, Merlin knows how many to go.” You sighed.

He let his disillusionment fade as well, taking the moon from your hand to look it over himself. Really, he just needed a temporary distraction, every now and then he would get this terrible urge to kiss you. You never had to do anything special for the thought to pop into his head, all he could do was suffer in silence until the ache went away. 

He handed the moon back to you and looked out to the bathroom. “You know, why don’t you give this bath a go? It could help you fall asleep, now that you got one less moon to worry about.”

He could see you thinking on it, clearly tempted.

“Come on, you came in late as a 7th year and you’ve been working yourself to the bone. I say you’ve earned it. It’s your only year at Hogwarts and we’re almost finished anyway. Go for it.”

“You’re such a bad influence.” You smirked at him, then scanned your eyes over the room. “This place is beautiful though, especially at night.” You thought aloud. “But what about you? If it helps you sleep, you should use it. I can come back for it another night when you’re feeling better.”

Sebastian was tempted too, this place had relaxed him in the way he needed most. It was pure tranquility. After everything that had happened that year, having that little bit of peace this place offered helped greatly. But he shook his head, “All yours tonight.”

You eyed him sadly as he looked down at his feet, shoving his hands in his pockets. You’d much rather he took it. You didn’t want to part ways with him quite yet either, but maybe this was his way of saying he needed to be alone at the moment. “Alright... thank you, Sebastian. Wait, how often do the prefects come to check on this place?”

“If they hear water running, they’re not coming in here.” He reassured you. “Even if they did suspect you weren’t someone who was allowed in here, they’d at least wait until you were clothed to rat you out.”

“Makes sense.” You exhaled, looking upon the immaculate bath the size of a pond. The thought of sitting in this beautiful, moonlit room enveloped in warm water was more enticing by the second.

Sebastian could see your dreamy stare and decided it was time for him to go. “I’ll leave you to it then.” He shot you a grin as he turned to make his way out.

“Seb.” You called softly, speaking before thinking.

“Hmm?” He turned to face you easily. 

“I um...” You didn’t want him to leave. Though you spent most of your days stuck together like glue, you wanted even more of him to yourself. You only had a few more weeks at Hogwarts, and then who knew where the two of you would be? 

He felt as if his heart skipped a beat when he saw the look on your face, he had never seen it on you before. It wasn’t happy, it wasn’t sad. It was hopeful... and aching. He didn’t know what to make of it as he waited for you to continue. He could see your chest rising and falling, your breathing seeming to get heavier. The sight made the wait for you to speak feel like it took ages.

You cleared your throat, mustering up the courage for your next words. “Please stay.”

His insides constricted in the most volatile way. You couldn’t possibly mean you wanted to bathe together, could you? Maybe you just thought you two could put your feet in the water? Surely no nakedness involved. Oh wonderful, he was thinking of you naked even though you were only a few feet away from him. He swallowed thickly. What do I say? What do I say?

‘Yes’ seemed like the best answer. On one hand, it could be innocent and there was no need for his mind to have taken him to such a risqué place. On the other, if you did want to bathe with him, he’d be the world’s biggest blockhead if he said ‘no’. 

He had fallen hard and fast for you his final year at Hogwarts. He wished, more than anything, you came in as a 1st year so you two could have made more memories together. But only one year with you was the hand he was dealt. So he’d take every second he could, no amount of time would have felt like it was enough anyhow.

After everything you had done for him, picking him back up after what happened with Anne and Solomon, keeping his friendship with Ominis in tact, and sticking by his side even though you’ve seen the worst sides of him, how could you possibly want someone like me? You were far, far too good for him.

Who was he fooling? There was no way he would have ever said ‘no’ to you. 

“I'll stay.” He answered as he took a step towards you, but that was all he’d let himself do. You needed to make the next move, so he could know what you wanted from him that night. He’d give you everything and more, all you needed to do was ask.

It was hard to keep calm when the flutter in your chest felt so overwhelming. Becoming jumpy, you brought your fingers up to unclasp your robes. 

His eyes went dark. Merlin’s sake, he needed to get it together. He had seen you take off your robes countless times before. And for all he knew, you’d only be taking off your shoes and tights as well.

You glanced up at him when you slipped your robes off, then went to put them at the front of the room near the large stack of towels. 

Sebastian watched your hips as you passed him. Easy now, still don’t know how far you want to go with this. He darted his gaze away and shrugged off his own robes. After tossing it aside, he went to turn on the faucets to fill up the giant tub. He desperately needed to busy himself to calm his nerves. 

He peeked over at you and watched, mesmerized, as you kicked off your shoes and pulled down your tights from under you skirt, slowly revealing the skin of your legs in the most tantalizing way. His breathing started to come out shallow, his lips parting slightly. 

You were either stopping there or you were going to keep going. This was the point where he’d know what you wanted. And if that was how he handled himself getting a look at your legs? He probably wouldn’t be coherent if you took it further.

Tucking your tights and shoes away, you looked back at him over your shoulder. He shot his gaze away and tried to look busy with the faucets. He knew he must have had a dumb, slack-jawed look on his face.

In your head, you were even more of a wreck. You had taken off everything that could be viewed as innocent. You could stop there and spend a relaxing night speaking with Sebastian, or you could try to take him how you’ve always wanted him ever since he smirked at you in your first Defense Against the Dark Arts class.

You knew he’d be a gentleman about all of this, so you’d have to make the first move in the direction you wanted to take it. The look on his face when he saw you had taken off your shoes and tights was encouraging. You glanced at him again but his focus was fully back on the faucets, not as encouraging.

You took a steadying breath, thankful the sound of the rushing water would drown it out. You mustered up every ounce of courage you had, locked the door, and turned your body so that you were facing him. This could be your only chance, it was now or never. Looking down at your shirt, you reached up and slowly began unbuttoning it. Once you got down to the button that opened your shirt enough to reveal the top of your bodice, you peeked up at him to check if he was looking.

And oh he was looking, the way he seemed to be watching you with undivided attention had the spark of a fire ignite in your core. You undid a few more buttons until you gradually stilled under the weight of his gaze, temporarily hypnotized by the way he was looking at you.

“Keep going.” He said, hypnotized himself. He could feel the blood draining from his head to go south, leaving it empty with nothing but thoughts of what more you could show him. He wanted all of you displayed before him, all to himself.

Your heartrate sped up, you hadn’t known what words you wanted to hear from him, but those were certainly an electrifying choice. You picked up where you left off and delighted in the way he kept his eyes on you. You got to the last of your buttons and slipped off your shirt, revealing your bodice and the skin of your shoulders.

He stood up straighter and faced you fully as he watched your shirt fall to the floor. Your skirt was less of a slow burn and more of a shock to his senses when it only took one undone button for it to fall as well.

He clenched his jaw and exhaled through his nose like he was being tortured. It wasn’t fair, the effect you had on him. He could see out of the corner of his eye that the tub still had a ways to go filling with water, so he hoped you would help him pass the time by continuing to do what you were doing.

You kept your eyes on him, nervous, excited, and aching to show him what was under your bodice. You began undoing the buttons of your final layer. His eyes fell down to your chest, and you could see his adam's apple bob in his throat. The heat you felt in your abdomen went lower, you felt it throb in the most delicious way. That throb only swelled when you glanced down at Sebastian’s pants, his erection pressing hard against the fabric. The thought of having caused it sent a thrill through you.

When you slipped off your bodice and revealed your breasts, he made his way towards you, not allowing this space between you anymore. Keeping your eyes on him as he approached, you swiftly pulled down your underskirts. His face turned pained seeing you fully naked before him, your most sensitive area exposed to him. 

He stood before you, eyes darting all over you, not sure where they wanted to feast upon more. You didn’t mind that you were naked and Sebastian wasn’t. Those hungry looks of his had been more than enough to send you over the edge. 

As you witnessed his eyes ardently roaming over you, you reached up and began undoing his tie, the rise and fall of his chest speeding up. You slid his tie off and went for his buttons, undoing them one by one. 

It was such an intoxicating contradiction to witness, watching you take control in such a tender way. He narrowed his eyes at you as you slipped his shirt off, fingers brushing along his skin as you did so. You met his gaze and sensed he was wordlessly begging you to release his hard length from his pants. 

Your lashes curtained your eyes as you looked down to undo his belt. He dared to touch you then, his fingers grazed your hips and he dragged them lightly up the sides of your torso. He held back, because the way he wanted to grab you, he was sure he’d leave bruises. You were so soft, almost like you were the most delicate thing he had ever touched, even though he knew full well you were far from it.

You undid his pants and looked back up at him. You were still for a moment and he wondered what was going through your head. Keeping your eyes on him, you gingerly grabbed at his length. You watched with delight as he hissed a breath through his teeth and shot his gaze down to your hand on him. You stroked your thumb across his tip and he almost collapsed.

He panicked when you released him and began walking away. He watched in stunned silence as you walked down the steps into the water and then dove in. You resurfaced and swam towards the faucets, turning them all off. His pants were hanging loose on his waist, his hard length teasing out of it. 

“Are you coming in?” You asked without looking at him, continuing to turn off the remaining faucets, your nipples peeking out of the water every time you reached up.

His body finally kicked in to gear. He nearly fell over as he hopped on one foot to yank off one shoe, then switched sides, just as unsteady while taking off the other. His hands were shaky and quick pulling off his socks, he threw them to the side, not caring if he ever saw them again. Once he shoved down his pants, he joined you in the water, not nearly as graceful as you and causing much more splashing.

You giggled as you swam to meet him, pulling his face into a kiss. He treaded the water as you held him close to you, relishing the feel of your mouth on his, your breasts pressing against him. The water was slick on your skin, he was half tempted to swim back and just watch you exist, naked and dripping wet. But he didn’t want to leave this position, not yet.

Your hands slid down and rested on his freckled shoulders, reveling at his hard muscles there. He pulled back from the kiss slightly, wanting to look at your face. He cupped your jaw with one hand and dragged his thumb along your skin, watching the water droplets run down. He couldn’t believe this was happening, he had been in love with you for so long, and he had you with him like this. And in the prefects’ bathroom to top it off? If this was a dream, he’d absolutely die if he woke up.

A smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he looked over your features, and you couldn’t help but smile back. Every look he gave you tonight had you melting.

“I want you to touch me.” You told him.

He was sure he was dreaming then, but he’d do everything in his power to not wake up. “I’m so glad.”

He grabbed your hand under the water and pulled you along as he swam towards the tub’s edge. He rested a hand on it to keep himself afloat. “Hold onto me.” He said. You complied, placing your hands back on his shoulders. His free hand remained under water, moving to your inner thigh, his fingers dragged up to your folds. He eyed you for your reaction, you nodded your head. The two of you looked down into the water at his hand, he ran his first finger through you, taking in the feel of it all. You dug your nails into his skin, it kept his member rock hard.

He had read books on sex before, but the boring ones. The ones with lifeless illustrations, education being the main purpose. He wasn’t completely ignorant of what was between your thighs, but he couldn’t truly know until he encountered it himself.

“Right there. Move your fingers on that spot.” Your whispered feedback had his insides reeling, and he threw out his plan to take his time feeling you. 

“How should I - what do I -” He was eager to please but he'd be lying if he said he knew how.

You put a hand over his and guided him towards the top of your slit. You moved his fingers in short, up and down, rubbing motions at a quick pace. You already knew how to get yourself off from alone time in the showers, and you were earnest to have him take your place. His rough, warm fingers would feel so much better.

“Like that.” You panted. “Keep touching me like that.”

He furrowed his brows and bit his lip in concentration, all his focus going to his fingers, he was going to get this right if it killed him.

You held onto him for support as he moved against you, your peak was approaching much faster with his fingers instead of yours. His eyes darted up and down, going up to your face and then back down to your need. 

You brought your hands up to his head and fisted his hair, he pressed his forehead against yours, keeping up his motions. You held him to you as your climax got closer and closer, wrapping one leg around his waist underneath the water. He was especially thankful being in the water then, it helped make the two of you more weightless. He knew he wouldn’t be able to hold this strong other wise. 

“I’m gonna - I’m -” He slammed his mouth onto yours to keep you quiet as he finished you off. Your muffled moan against his lips and your body spasming against his hand had him ravenous.

You pulled back from him to catch your breath, and you let your head fall against his shoulder. He held you close to him and rested his cheek against the top of your head. He wanted to make you feel that good all the time, wanted to be the only one who ever did.

You drifted back and put your hands on his chest. “Sit down.” You commanded, your breath still a bit uneven. You pushed him back gently through the water, towards the steps. 

“Alright.” He responded, compliant and enamored. He kept his eyes on you as he swam backwards and sat, not wanting to miss a second of you.

He took a steadying breath as you settled your knees on either side of his legs, straddling him. He exhaled sharply when you gripped his length under the water, “Now tell me how to touch you.”

His brain couldn’t process your question. He was eye level with your chest and stared ahead with half-lidded eyes, the water droplets running down you were madness inducing. He couldn’t stop himself from cupping some water into his hand and smearing it across your chest to make you glisten even more in wetness.

“Seb.” You whimpered, gripping him tighter.

His glazed eyes looked up to yours. He was delirious, there was so much of you to look at and you were touching him in a place no one else had. Getting his hand to act since his mouth couldn’t, he followed your lead and guided you on what to do. 

You wrapped your fingers around him and stroked up and down in the way he silently instructed. He leaned his elbows back on the steps and watched you, bewitched, as you fixated on his pleasure. 

You propped one hand against his chest as your other worked up and down his shaft. “A bit faster.” He groaned. “That’s...” His eyes rolled into the back of his head. “Ah that’s it.” The sound of water sloshing along with your breathing echoed throughout the prefects’ bathroom, and he was nearing his peak faster than he wanted. Quickly, he leaned forward and removed your hand from him. 

“What’s wrong?” You asked in a slight panic, he grabbed your face and pulled you into a kiss to put you at ease.

“Nothing.” He reassured once he pulled back. He looked up at you with longing, tortured eyes and stroked your cheek. “Can I be inside you?”

Your insides set ablaze and you nodded your head. He swallowed thickly as you adjusted on top of him, positioning yourself over his length. His hands moved to your hips and he gripped tightly, looking down into the water at you two about to join.

He did everything he could to inwardly steady himself. “Right...” He breathed. “Now... When I’m about to finish, you need to uh...” Focus! He shot a hand through his wet hair quickly then placed it back on your hip. “You need to withdraw from me, alright?” 

You nodded your head, just as frantic at the anticipation as he was. “I will.”

Ignoring your jittery nerves, you took him in your hand to guide his tip to your entrance. Slowly, you sunk yourself onto him, taking your time as you felt him stretch you out to fit deeper. You felt his body stiffen under you. With a throaty groan, he wrapped his arms around you and rested his forehead against your chest. You brought your hands up to the back of his head and held him close as you both breathed through it.

He wanted to be stuck in this position forever. The feel of your heat slowly enveloping him was unreal. You whimpered as you took more of him into you. He kissed the spot between your breasts, “Go slow. Go slow.” He whispered against your skin. The words were meant for him just as much as they were you.

His eyes squeezed shut briefly when you had him fully in you.

“I - I think I’m alright now.” You said, and could feel him nod against your chest.

You swallowed the dryness in your throat, and leaned back a bit to look down into the water. Catching your curious gaze at what it looked like being joined together was one of the most arousing things he had ever witnessed. 

You thought back to how he wanted your hand to move on him, so you gripped his shoulders and moved your heat up and down his length.

His hands moved down from your hips to your bottom, groping roughly. He leaned back enough so he could watch you bounce on him, quicker and quicker as you became more accustomed to the feel of him inside you.

He was becoming unhinged at it all. The feel of your heat gliding along him, the movement of your dripping wet breasts, your nails digging into his shoulders, and the sound of your panting breaths mixed with his. His climax was coming fast. 

“Ah I’m about to - Please don’t stop.” He could hardly speak, and his vision was getting blurry. He leaned forward to bite at your skin, he didn’t care where, anywhere. You arched your back at the feel of his teeth, and you knew he was nearing the edge. You withdrew yourself from him just enough to take him in your hand and he kept his hands on your ass. You stroked him fast to finish him off, but an urge to take him in your mouth took over. You broke away from his grasp and submerged your face under the water, wrapping your mouth around him. 

“W - Wait,” He breathed heavily, “What are you - o - oh...” His words melted into grunts as his head fell back and he spilled into your mouth.

When you felt he was done, you swallowed him and went back up for air. Wiping the water from your face, you saw his eyes were wide at you and he was trying to catch his breath. It was the most exhilarating sight.

He didn’t know what possessed you to put your mouth on him, but he needed to figure it out so he could ensure it possessed you next time too.

A dreamy sigh left your lips and you laid back into the water, floating contently as you looked up at the ceiling. He leaned back on his elbows and watched you, his legs too wobbly to move anywhere. It was quite the way to bring seven years at Hogwarts to a close.

“You know I’m in love with you, right?” Despite the lighthearted wording, there was gravity in his delivery.

You went up straight in the water to look at him. Hiding your dopey smile, you submerged yourself until it was just your eyes peeking out at him.

Getting bashful himself, he leaned forward on his knees and rubbed at his face. “Yeah, you know.” He laughed breathily. He was all too proud seeing how flushed your cheeks were and knowing he was the cause.

You swam back to him until you were standing on the steps below him. Placing your hands on his knees, you leaned forward and kissed him. You pulled back, getting a good look at all of his freckles. “I thought it was obvious I'm in love with you too.”

He pulled you back onto his lap. Gripping your thighs, he claimed your mouth with a deeper kiss. You were both tired now. He just needed this last taste of you, this last feel of your wet skin on his before you separated.

He tore himself from you and looked into your sleepy eyes with his. “Bed?” 

“Afraid so.” You sighed, getting up off his lap.

You grabbed his hand, pulling him with you out of the tub. Towels were aplenty in the prefect bathroom, and he grabbed one for you and him. As the two of you dried off, the exhaustion really kicked in. You gave each other sleepy smiles as you caught the other’s eye, trying to sneak glances as you put your uniforms back on.

He finished dressing before you did and went to help you with your last few buttons. “Stay with me in Feldcroft this summer. It’d mean the world to me if you did.” 

You met his half-lidded eyes with yours, a lazy smile on your lips. “Of course, I will.” 

He gave you one more lax kiss, then went to unlock the door. You picked up the demiguise moon and he opened the door for you.

“What in Merlin’s name?!” A younger prefect’s unwelcome voice knocked you two out of your magical haze.

Sebastian rolled his eyes and pushed you defensively behind him, keeping you hidden.

“Were you two in the prefects' bathroom? At the same time?! Don’t tell me you… in our bathroom!”

“I think you’re mistaken, we were just retrieving a demiguise statue for Mr. Moon, that’s all.” Sebastian grabbed the moon from your hand and walked up to the prefect, their height difference becoming very apparent when he came toe to toe and looked down his nose at him. 

“B - But your hair’s wet! Both of you -” 

“I’ll say it once more since it doesn’t seem like you heard me. You’re mistaken.” Sebastian repeated. “And if I hear any rumors about what you think happened, I’ll know who started them, won’t I? I only have a few weeks left here at Hogwarts, let’s see to it they go by smoothly, yeah?”

“F - Fine. Just get back to Mr. Moon straightaway and go to your dorms.”

He gave the prefect a couple solid pats on the cheek. “Attaboy.”

Grumbling, the prefect turned on his heel and left.

Sebastian returned to your side, wrapping an arm around your waist and practically carrying you out of the faculty tower. “Were you trying to protect my honor back there?” You teased and could see he was biting back a cocky grin.

“I was. I could go back and scare him some more since you seem so pleased about it.”

He cackled when you smacked his arm. Sleepless nights weren’t so bad anymore.

[naomikozura]

Playing With Fire: Chapter 8

Jason Todd (Red Hood) x Fem!Reader (Criminal)

Trope: Enemies to Lovers, Forbidden Romance

Warnings: strong language, mentions of explosives/bombs, use of weapons/guns, mentions of murder, angst, emotional trauma, mentions of killing someone, arguments, emotional turmoil, plotting, mentions of robbery, kidnapping, and abuse, flashbacks (lmk if I missed any!)

WC: 7.5K

Summary: As you prepare for a meeting with Sionis, you can't help the memories of the past that flood your mind, reliving moments you never thought would be so distant. You feel a sense of regret, something you haven't felt in a long time, wondering where did everything go wrong? And when did everything start to get worse?

Series Masterlist

Chapter 7 || Chapter 9

The sound of Joker’s maniacal laugh broke out into the room once again. You found yourself sitting on the couch, a bored expression on your face, as Joker continued to taunt Sionis’ guards. You could see the glint of fear in their eyes but their training in high profile security made them barely have a reaction. Minus the new hire who got punched in the face by Sionis. He seemed a lot jumpier than the other new guards he’d contracted. 

You watched as Sionis conducted his usual meeting, this time focusing more on Joker’s psychotic idea of a plan, and using all the information necessary to lure Red out of hiding. Sionis thought it genius, you thought of it as overkill. 

You turned, looking out the window and taking in the darkness of the city. It was late, Penguin had sent you to work with Sionis for the time being, not knowing when his next job would come up so it was good to get payment even if it was through the bastard. 

“So when can we get this moving forward?”, Sionis’ deep voice sounded irritated, but you knew he was just impatient. He wanted results a month ago, hell since Red first started to make hits on his operations. He hated losing money so the fact that he’d lost millions over the course of three months made him dangerous and craved the sight of Red’s dead body. 

A pull in your gut made you wallow in your thoughts. Your fight with Red entered your mind, wondering how everything turned bad so fast. Your pride refused to let you admit that you overreacted, that he was just trying to help. But the last time you let someone try helping you they ended up abandoning you. You couldn’t help but be cautious. Even if it meant reacting completely out of character. 

“Give me a week, maybe two. I'll think of something and then I can get my fun started up”, the smile faded, perhaps it’d been the first time you’d seen Joker without that stupid smirk. “Though, I think it’ll be more fun without her involved.”

Your eyes met Joker’s, narrowing at him as he pointed at you. You sat up, pushing yourself out of the chair and stretching.

“Sounds like a plan.”, you mocked before Sionis snapped his glare at you, his eyes darkening. Although he hated that you rejected him so casually, he knew you were an asset to this more than anything. 

“Sit down.” he threatened. “You’re here for a reason.”

You rolled your eyes before plopping back down into the seat. You didn’t even need to be here. Not at Sionis Industries, not even in Gotham. Still, you wanted to see what exactly they were trying to do, regardless of how you felt about it personally. 

“I think this will be fun, even with you involved.”, Joker sneered. “In fact, I’ll find a special part for you to play!”

“I don’t want a special part in your dumb game.”, you muttered. 

“Oh you’re feisty!”, he clapped. “I love this already.”

God, you couldn’t believe you were really sitting in a room full of men having to listen to them go over a plan and address you like some after thought. You turned around, letting their conversation blend into the background as you sat around for another hour. When they finally finished, you got up and left. 

It was almost 4am. 

You needed to get some sleep, try to get some sleep, but you’d felt waves of insomnia crash into you as the days went by. You tried drinking tea, medicine, everything to get you back on a normal schedule but it felt like your body was going through every possible loop to keep you from having a comfortable night of rest. 

You walked around your apartment, walking to the restroom to finish getting ready to try and sleep when you looked over at the duffel bags in the closet. You still haven't touched the money. Hadn’t started to slowly deposit it or even used it for anything. You couldn’t bring yourself to use the money. Even though you had done the work to deserve the payout, a piece of you still refused to use it.

Shaking your head, you changed into a cami and shorts, trying to ignore the thoughts in your head before they quickly came back. You pulled your hair into a ponytail, your neck exposed as you stared at yourself in the mirror. You ran a hand over your neck, the lingering of Red’s touch evident on your skin. You had small bite marks that had started to bruise, not too dark but slowly fading. As much as you tried to ignore the little chips he made at your armor, you couldn’t keep them at bay forever. Your skin felt like it was on fire, the blush creeping up your neck as you turned, moving away from the exposure the mirror gave to the marks on your skin. 

You let your body fall on the bed, the sheets cool on your skin as you stare at the ceiling, letting your argument get to you again. You turned towards the window, laying relaxed against the sheets and breathing in the natural smell of your apartment. It smelled like sage and lavender, a relaxing and calming aroma that allowed you to feel a sense of relief. Though, the emptiness you felt in your chest at the moment provided you no sense of relief, it made you heavy with remorse. 

Your pride, your anger, your trauma, it all made you react towards Red in a way you wished you hadn’t. He was trying to help you, trying to understand, and you just pushed him away. You had your reservations about everything having to do with him but somehow, over the weeks, it all changed. You convinced yourself you let him live because of your hatred towards Sionis, but once Sionis was removed from the picture entirely you couldn’t bring yourself to come up with reasons to dislike him. Especially not after the Gala. 

Regardless of his family, he still treated you like an equal. In midst of all the fights, the arguing, the hits, the targeting, he knew you were talented, strong, smart, quick, and he respected you in a way not many men in this life could openly admit they did. It made him stand out in a way regardless of the fact that he was another vigilante running around on the street wreaking havoc. 

You let yourself fall into sleep, watching as the darkness consumed your body and whispered a lullaby of reassurance, leaving you feeling the warmth of  the night. 

“Calvi finally agreed to come over to our side of business.”, Penguin’s voice sounded as he shifted through the papers on his desk. You looked up at him from the filing cabinet as you looked for specific paperwork he needed to follow up with an investor on one of his businesses. You pulled the file, skimming the contents, before walking over to his desk and setting it down gently. 

“When did he confirm his new alliance?”

“Just a few days after the Gala. Said he wanted to get more insight on our operation and agreed whenever you put mention of my name on the table. Said he’d rather have business investments that will benefit his own businesses while having protection than just having bare minimum protection.”, you hummed in response. It made sense. Calvi always wanted to ensure his businesses were kept under top security, himself included considering his ties within the underground. He hadn’t reached out to you for a few days, probably working on his own business needs but a part of you was glad you wouldn’t have to deal with him again. Although he looked the part of the ideal partner, he was far from it and not the thing you wanted. 

“I don’t have anything new for you, so just stick with Sionis until something comes up”, a piece of you felt a tug of annoyance at having to work with Sionis so closely, but you only nodded. You continued to help him fix his paperwork, getting a few miniscule things finished before heading home for the night. 

“I think I can wrap up. You can go ahead.”, Penguin motioned as you watched him intently. He’d been a lot less busy, but then again, it was slow season at the Lounge and the majority of his efforts were spent helping Sionis catch Red. Another pang of emotion hit you in the gut, making your hands twitch slightly before you pulled them back. “Be careful, it’s supposed to down pour tonight.”

You nodded as you walked to your locker, putting everything away before you went home for the evening. You slid on the jacket you brought with you to cover you from the rain. It’d started to rain a lot more this week, which didn’t make it convenient considering you had walked today. A cab might be the better option to avoid the water, but you decided against it, especially on this side of town. 

You pulled the hood over your head, grabbing your bag and leaving the Lounge as you walked through the streets. It was only 7pm so the light was still out but the clouds made it seem a lot later than it actually was. You couldn’t really bring yourself to focus on anything this week, you needed to snap into focus before tomorrow. You needed to complete the job, letting your mind wander to a million different things would keep you from completing your work. 

The streets were filled with people trying to get home, most of them wearing raincoats or with umbrellas, cars filling the streets as you heard the distant rumble of the sky as the thunder sounded out. It had started raining more, especially considering that Gotham wasn’t usually in rain season this time of the year. Then again, the rain and gloomy clouds added to the ambiance of the city. It seemed fitting for a place like Gotham. 

You found yourself nearing your apartment, looking up to take in the look of the sky before continuing towards your building. You had gotten soaked, your bag was luckily covered in a material that was partially rain resistant, so it wouldn’t get your personal things wet, regardless they were replaceable so it didn’t make you worry too much. 

Navigating through the people who lived in your area seemed easy enough, but it had gotten a lot more crowded since the rents had dropped. More people were moving in and that meant there would be more people wandering around your complex. You tried to push through the people, and even though it wasn’t crowded, a body still hit your shoulder. You push back, snapping around you trying to yell at the person who’d bumped into you only for the words to die in your mouth.

Your eyes widened at the sight of Red in front of you. No mask, no suit. Just dark jeans, an oversized hoodie, and his body drenched in water. His eyes stared at yours in a widened glance, the rain falling around both of you and the people moving around your frozen bodies. You met his green eyes, silent as you stared at him in shock. 

Why was he on this side of town?

You didn’t have time for this, you couldn’t talk to him, not like this. You turned towards the streets that led to your home before you felt a hand wrap around your wrist, pulling you back as your head swiveled around to look at him again. 

“Y/n.”, was all he said because just like you, he couldn’t find anything to say. He wanted to talk, wanted to apologize but his pride and ego made him feel small. He had no right to ask for you to hear him out. Yet, he didn’t let go of your wrist. “Please”

You look at the ground, narrowing your eyes and furrowing your brows, trying to find the words to say to him in the middle of your anger, in the midst of your disappointment. 

“I.. I’m sorry.”, he said as the rain covered his words, the downpour made it difficult to hear him but you heard the words clear as day. You felt a tug in your chest. 

“I have to go.”, you tried pulling away but he kept you still, pulling down his hood and letting you see him fully. His hair was overly saturated with water and his clothes were far more drenched than yours were. You had tried staying in covered spaces while on your walk home to minimize getting soaked but you ended up with wet clothes anyway. 

“Y/n, I mean it.”, he breathed. “I’m sorry for the other night.”

You clenched your teeth, tightening your jaw as he continued. “I shouldn’t have said what I did that day. I know you’ve tried everything to get to where you are and even if you don’t realize it, you’re worth far more than any of those lowlives. Even if you don’t accept my apology or never talk to me again, I just wanted to say I’m sorry for that night.”

“Yeah”, you whispered. 

“I..”, his other hand fisted as he forced himself to say his next words. “Even if you don’t believe me, I know what it’s like to not have control or power. I know why you do the things you do, you had no other choice. I didn’t have another choice either. It’s not that you haven’t figured it out, you have. That’s why you’re leaving.”

Your lachrymose eyes met his dark ones, showing his honesty in every one of his words. 

“I hope you find what you’re looking for wherever you go.”, he smiled weakly. “I hope it’s better than here.”, he let go of your hand, relaxing as he watched you intently. You couldn’t bring yourself to say anything to him. He was finally understanding why you’d worked with Penguin, why you put up with Sionis, why you struggled to find a way out of the city that took everything from you. You had no reason to stay, and even if there was a sliver of reason, it didn’t exist anymore. It hadn’t existed in years. 

You turned away from him, the echo of his words ringing in your ears as the volume spoke over the cracking of the thunder. 

“Is it worth it?”

His words held a double meaning. You paused, contemplating a response as you read between the lines far too quickly. 

Is this worth giving yourself up for?

The weight of his question lingered in the air, a haunting reminder of the sacrifices made and the dreams that you were forced to abandon. You faced the storm, the wind whipping around you, and felt the chill of uncertainty seeping into your bones. The city behind you, with its tangled webs and broken promises, had always been a place of struggle and compromise. With his words ringing through the winds, you questioned if all the work you’d done, the price you paid, was it all worth it for that freedom you’d always dreamt of?

Deep down, you wanted to believe that it was worth it, that all of this had been for something and not just a broken dream you were trying so hard to mend. You already lost so much, given up pieces of yourself for people like Penguin and Sionis, and in the end you were scared you’d end up with nothing. 

The storm raged on, but within you, a quiet resolve began to take shape. You took a deep breath, turning your gaze back towards him one last time. The truth in his eyes was undeniable—he understood more than anyone could. You could see the reflection of your own doubts in his dark gaze, and with a nod of silent understanding, you gave him the answer he needed. 

Even if it was a lie. 

“Yes,” you finally said, though the words were barely audible over the wind of the storm. And with that, you walked away, leaving him behind and moving towards the darkness of your apartment. 

The next morning was busy as you walked through the streets, letting your mind wander and getting a few errands finished before meeting with Sionis tonight. You were called in to get the information you needed to help carry out Joker’s plan, though you knew you’d find a way out of it entirely. 

Your mind couldn’t help but go back to Red, the entire fight with him just eating at you. You felt a sting in your chest at his words the other day, a big piece of you regretting that fight entirely. You knew he meant well, but you didn’t live in a position to give others the benefit of the doubt. It was kill or be killed, the most crucial game of survival and you were playing it to your fullest extent. You weren’t going to let yourself be caught in a web that would lead to your demise. 

As you walked past a small restaurant, you lingered, watching a young couple sitting together as they smiled at one another. You’d wondered if that was why your life could be like if you’d just…. stayed with the family. If Robin had stayed around.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flashback

“Rob, come on, let’s go try this new cafe I saw”

“Okay, okay. Relax we got all day.”, Robin muttered, a piece of you excited to try the cafe that had just opened. 

“I think this will be fun”, you smile at him, his smirk spreading across his lips as you tugged him with you, his eyes hidden behind bud signature dark glasses. 

“So, is this considered our first date?”, he teased as he caught up to your speed, his hand lacing in yours as he smiled down at you from the height difference. He was dressed in dark jeans, a loose fitting dark shirt and a jacket over top, his hair messy as always.

“I don’t know, if I don’t know what you look like wouldn’t it be a blind date?”, you cocked your head slightly. 

“I think that only counts if you’ve never met the person before. We already know each other”, he raised an eyebrow. 

“Well until you show me what you look like, we can call these friendly dates.”

“You see me as a friend?”, Robin raised a hand to his chest, “I’m honored”

You shoved him slightly, letting your hair fall in your face as you laughed at him. 

The two of you normally would meet at night, so going out during the day was a big move for both of you, especially considering you were publicly hanging out with someone when you never had before. It was him. He made you disregard any type of snide comments anyone could make. He knew about the people at Gotham Academy that would make fun of you, wishing he could make it stop but you went to different schools. So, his company was good enough to forget all about those other students. 

It was warm, spring time was nice in Gotham sans the rain, making the day nice to walk around the streets and take in the city through a day time lense. 

You leaned into him, grabbing his arm as you sank into his presence. It was nice having someone you could talk to about everything, especially someone like him. You felt like someone could finally see you, understood you, someone finally… cared.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The slight breeze blew your hair from your face as you moved through the crowds of people, the busy streets of Gotham a stark contrast to the inner turmoil you had going on. The towering buildings loomed above, casting long shadows that seemed to mirror the darkness you felt inside. You checked the time on your phone again, knowing you still had a few hours before your meeting with Sionis.

Regret gnawed at you, an unwelcome feeling since your last encounter with Red. You could still see the hurt in his eyes, a flicker of betrayal that cut deeper than any physical wound. You hadn’t meant for things to go that way, but your pride wouldn’t let you back down. You were too afraid to show weakness, too afraid to let him see how scared you were to let someone in. 

You wondered if he’d be the one who could’ve won you over, could’ve made you lower your walls and let yourself feel what it was like to just be a normal person in this godforsaken city. A piece of you wondered if he was thinking about you too. Did he also feel like there was something unresolved? Did he think about the fight? Was he also regretting it? Did it hurt him like it hurt you?

You let out a shaky breath, letting your thoughts spiral and holding on to the hope that maybe, just maybe, you could fix things between the two of you. Should you find him, send him a signal to meet at the rooftop you’d always see each other at? You looked at the ground as you walked through the streets, taking a deep breath and moving through the crowd. 

You needed to get home, it would be soon that you’d have to meet with Sionis and Joker, you needed to focus. As you walked through the streets, the city swallowed you up once more, but the regret remained, a silent whisper in the back of your mind.

Flash back 

The warm breeze rustled through the trees as you and Robin moved through the hidden paths of Gotham’s hidden, less known parks. This was one of the few days they would go out together, knowing they could finally get away from only seeing each other at night. You enjoyed moments during the day a lot more, you felt like he did too but never asked, it seemed a lot more normal. The both of you reached a secluded pond, the sun making the water glisten in a golden glow. 

You kicked off your shoes, walking to the water to dip your feet in, smiling at the warmth of the water. You turned over to Robin who stood staring at you with a smile on his face. “Come on, come feel the water.” 

He shook his head slightly, bending over and rolling up his jeans, proceeding to take off his shoes before walking next to you. “You know, I don’t think Batman would approve of this.”

“You care too much about what he thinks.”, you teased. “Besides, Batman isn’t here, is he? It’s just you and me.”

“Yeah, I guess so.”, he shrugged. “He can be a bit controlling sometimes but I know he means well.”

You hummed in response, looking down at the water surrounding your feet, your reflections staring right back at you. The silence covered both of you like a blanket of comfort and tranquility. Sometimes the both of you were more than content not speaking, it was what made you like hanging out with him, he didn’t fear the quiet. 

“Y/n”, he said finally after what felt like forever. “What do you want to do once you finish everything? You know, if both of us ever get the chance to leave Gotham?”

“I don’t know.”, you looked at the water, your eyes focused on the ripples that slowly formed from you moving your weight to be distributed evenly. “I’d like to travel, move to another city, anything to make everything feel more normal.”

“Yeah,” he breathed. “We can go to another city and just forget Gotham. Just you and me.”, 

You smiled at him as he looked at you with a warm smile, the kind of warmth that leaves you feeling like everything would be okay no matter how difficult times got. He always made you feel okay no matter what. 

The silence came over you again, the trees surrounding both of you, creating a tranquil and calming background. You felt Robin intertwined his fingers into yours, this thumb rubbing the back of your hand as he turned towards you. “Promise me something.”, he said softly, his hair falling over his forehead. 

“Anything.”, you replied, turning to face him. 

“Promise me that no matter what happens, you'll find a way to be happy. Even if it's without me."

Your heart tightened at his words, squeezing his hand in yours. "I promise, but only if you promise the same."

He smiled, a bittersweet expression that hinted at the weight he carried. "I promise."

You felt your heart beat faster, letting yourself soak in the moment before the both of you went back to your home. As you walked back in silence, you couldn’t stop smiling, wanting these moments to never end. Always wanting them with him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You looked out at the city below from your window sill, the quiet rush of the cars below adding to the ambiance of the afternoon. You felt a heaviness in your heart, the memory of that day in the park was as vivid as ever. The promise you made to Robin, to be happy even if it was without him, it stung knowing you wouldn’t be happy with him. You tried finding the good from the bad, tried to find happiness in the middle of all the shitty hands you’d been dealt over the years, but that gaping hole in your chest made it hard to go on. You felt a piece of you just got ripped from your chest and you were left to walk through the world with a heart broken. 

You reached up to play with the small pendant on your necklace, the silence letting you sit with your thoughts. How do you open up to anyone the way you did with him after he left? After he made you feel like you were worth everything to being left feeling like nothing. You clung to the memory of your laughter, your dreams, and your unspoken love, even as the world around you grew darker. You knew you had started to feel stronger feelings than just like towards him, you both were just teenagers but you knew deep down he was more than just someone who would stay for a short while. You knew he’d be long term. 

Believed. 

Because he just wasn’t anymore. He wasn’t long term nor was he anything more than a memory. You turned to get ready for your meeting with Sionis and Joker, wiping the stray tear that fell down your cheek as you let your walls build back up into a fortress of solitude, mentally preparing for the night ahead. You couldn’t let your past haunt you, but with the way you’d been acting towards Red, it was like all of those memories just flooded back, explaining why you’d been so short, cold, distant. Still, weakness wasn’t an option. Not in Gotham. Not with the life you’d chosen. But in the walls of your apartment, the walls of your bedroom, you’d let yourself break. You’d give yourself those moments of weakness to endure the pain you’d never truly healed from, the hurt of being abandoned so easily just like everyone else in her life had done to her, it all only happened in the confines of your apartment. You’d let yourself reminisce, let yourself look back on the memories allowing yourself to find a sliver of happiness in the promises you once made with Robin. 

The promises you’d made to each other. 

Even if he broke all of his. 

Flashback 

The sun dipped slowly behind the Gotham skyline, casting a golden hue over the rooftop where you and Robin sat. You laughed as you watched him balance himself on the ledge of the building, his street clothing not providing much balance since his pants were baggy and it looked like he almost tripped over himself. 

“You’re going to fall, you know.”, you called out, shaking your head but smiling at him nonetheless.

“Not a chance.”, he replied with a grin before effortlessly hopping down to sit beside you. “That would be major ego damage considering I’m a literal sidekick to the city’s most known vigilante.”

You rolled your eyes at him, “Yeah, and then Batman would have to fire you. The news would eat that up.”, you lifted your hands and made a headline motion. “Breaking News: Batman fires the Boy Wonder, the reason? Lack of balance and coordination.”

He nudged you as the both of you laughed, his smile was warm and sweet, making your heart flutter at how he looked so handsome in such a casual setting. You laid back, looking at the clouds as they started to turn into a golden color due to the sunset, letting the warm weather sink into your skin. Robin turned his head towards you, his expression softening at your laid back demeanor, 

“Tell me something.”, he said softly. 

“Huh?”, you turned towards him, cocking an eyebrow in confusion. 

“Tell me something you’ve never told anyone else.”, he repeated, his eyes filled with curiosity as you looked at him. 

“What? No, you first.”, you nudged him.

He turned his head back towards the sky, taking in a deep breath and taking a moment to think. “"I used to be afraid of the dark. Crazy, right? Gotham's full of shadows, and I'm out there every night."

You laughed softly. "Not crazy at all. I used to be scared of thunderstorms. The noise, the flashes of light—it was scary as hell. Especially being on the street and hearing people screaming. It all felt so overwhelming."

He reached out, taking your hand in his. "We're not so different, are we?"

You squeezed his hand, feeling a warmth spread through your chest. "No, I guess we're not."

The dim light of your restroom mirror cast a soft glow on your skin as you pulled your hair out of the towel it was in, drying it before having to head out to Sionis Industries for your meeting with Sionis and Joker. You watched yourself as you dried your hair with the blow dryer quickly, letting your hair sit on your neck still a bit damp as you applied some makeup. Although you didn’t need much, you still liked wearing it. It gave you more confidence, made you more bold. You applied mascara gently, watching yourself as you pulled back from leaning over the sink. Your eyes held a trace of melancholy—a reflection of the memories that never quite left you.

You quickly changed into a pair of dark jeans that fit your body perfectly, the black tee paired with it as you pulled on your leather jacket. You did a final look in the mirror before feeling good enough to head out, your mind still in shambles as you left through the window and to your bike in the alley below. 

The streets weren’t too busy tonight, but it was still early. Having a meeting at 9pm seemed strange enough as it is, most times Sionis liked to call them in the middle of the day or in the middle of the night. You wondered why he would call for such an early time, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. 

Arriving at Sionis Industries was easy enough, it would be dealing with Sionis and his disgusting self that would pose as the greatest difficulty. Out of anything, you could always expect for him to try and convince you to work for him or be his. Something you would always deny. 

What else could possibly happen that would surprise you?

You walked through the building, using the access card to swipe into the door and reach the elevator that brought you to Sionis’ office. The guards nodded towards you before opening the door and letting you in, Sionis immediately skimming your body as he smirked, Joker lounging on the sofa as a twisted smile played on his lips. 

“Y/n”, Sionis greeted you, his tone serious but also had a hint of amusement. “Finally here,”

Joker’s eyes watched you with curiosity and mischief as he smiled at you. “Aren’t you dressed up all nice?”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes, grabbing a chair and plopping down in it as you crossed your legs and sitting opposite of them. “Alright. What are we here for?”

“Relax lambchop, we’ll figure it out soon enough.”, Joker laughed maniacally as you narrowed your eyes at him. “I have a good idea of what to do, let’s hope it’s just as fun in action as it is in my head.”

Great. You knew he was about to explain this in intense detail. Joker was one for theatrics so you wouldn’t put it past him to create a whole idea of how exactly every part of his stupid plan would go. 

Joker leaned forward, his eyes full of an unsettling mix of mischief and madness. “Alright, picture this: we’re going to execute a plan so chaotic, so beautifully disorganized that it will make every other plan look like a kindergarten craft project.”

He paused for dramatic effect, his grin stretching wider. “We’re going to use a high-profile, yet subtle diversion to grab Batman’s attention. Something that screams ‘look at me’ but doesn’t blow up in our faces. I’m thinking of something like an orchestrated crime spree—a series of high-impact, carefully staged incidents across Gotham.” Joker leaned back, his eyes gleaming with unrestrained excitement as he began laying out the details of his plan. 

You raised an eyebrow. “And these incidents?”

Joker waved a hand dismissively. “Oh, just a series of carefully planned heists and disturbances. Let’s say a jewelry store robbery where the ‘thieves’ leave behind a trail of glittering jewels as a calling card. A string of arson cases where the buildings are left untouched, but the flames form a message. Something flashy enough to make Batman’s ears perk up, but not so catastrophic that it draws every law enforcement officer in the city.”

“And the goal is to get Batman’s attention. Then what?”, you were not following his stupid plan at all. How did Red fit into this? He was the goal not Batman. 

“Exactly!” Joker’s grin was nearly maniacal. “Once Batman is sufficiently distracted by the chaos we’re creating, we set the real trap. The key is to make sure he’s lured into a specific area—a rundown warehouse on the edge of town. It’s got the right amount of isolation and drama for a grand showdown.”

Joker paused for effect, letting the anticipation build. “The warehouse will be rigged with a variety of surprises. Hidden cameras, explosives, and a few more ‘enhancements’ to ensure that once the Bat shows up, he’s not just dealing with one problem. No, no, he’ll be dealing with a carefully orchestrated mess.”

“And Red Hood? How does he fit into this?”

Joker’s eyes sparkled. “Well all of this is for us to lure Hoodie out. He’s at arms with the Bats, so if we get the Bat’s attention, we get the Hood’s!”

Sionis glared daggers at Joker, his patience visibly fraying. “You think this is a joke? I need this done, Joker. I don’t have time for your little games.”

Joker’s grin didn’t falter. “Oh, I’m not joking. Trust me, this will be a grand spectacle. We get Batman involved, and the Hood will come crawling out of his hole just to join the fray. It’s like a free-for-all, and everyone loves a good free-for-all.”

Sionis’s eyes narrowed. 

“And what if Batman doesn’t show? Or worse, what if they both decide to focus on you?”, you spoke up, not wanting to see another one of Sionis’ fits. 

Joker chuckled. “Then we get a front-row seat to the greatest showdown Gotham has ever seen. Either way, the plan is to ensure that your problem, Red Hood, becomes nonexistent—preferably permanently.”

You leaned back in your chair, considering the chaos Joker was proposing. “Alright, assuming this works and we draw out the Hood. What’s the plan for getting rid of him?”

“Ah, that’s where the real artistry comes in,” Joker said, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “We’ll set up a little stage for our confrontation—somewhere dramatic, like an old warehouse. And when the time’s right, we’ll make sure the Hood gets a front-row seat to his own demise.”

Sionis ran a hand over his mouth, clearly stressed with Joker’s plan. 

“All I need is a couple of explosives, maybe find a good bank to rob just to draw him out a little. Something unexpected but also predictable. It’ll bring him out for sure.”

“We don’t have time or money to waste on a stupid bank robbery! I need him to come out and I need you to kill him. That’s what I paid your bond for, not to play dress up!”, Sionis slammed his fist on the table, finally snapping as Joker staring at him with a deadpan face as he picked at his nails. 

“You’re irritable today.”

“I’m losing more money every minute this son of a bitch is out on the street, so yes. I am irritable today. Everyday!”, the clipped sound of his tone made it obvious that Sionis was over Joker’s antics, but you couldn’t care less. If anyone deserved to be toyed with it was Sionis, especially him. 

“Take it easy, I got it under control.”, and suddenly Joker smiled like he got a new thought into his delusional mind. “It’ll be fun”

“I want someone’s head on my wall and it’s either gonna be the Red headed bastard or yours. If this doesn’t work I’m sawing your fucking head off.”, a ringing echoed through the room as Sionis stood to his feet, walking out of the room as some of his guards followed him out. 

The silence left you a bit uneasy, but it was the Joker who left you on edge more than anything else. The rest of the guards stepped outside, leaving only two inside the room as you watched Joker play with the materials on Sionis’ desk. You wondered for a split second what could have made Joker be so inhuman, so out of touch, so… psychotic. You’d always heard stories about his lack of care or empathy, or any regular human thinking. He was too far gone, more so than any other criminal within Gotham or other cities. He was one of the heavy hitters, one of the most dangerous. If you didn’t work with Penguin and be under his protection, you would fear him a little more than you did now. 

Still, caution was never overdone when it came to people like him. 

“So, do you think this plan will actually help lure him out?”, you knew where he was, but that wasn’t information for you to share. Not like you would have anyway. 

“I think it’ll get him motivated.”, Joker leaned back in his chair, his movements staying controlled as he looked at the ceiling. “Besides, the bank robbery isn’t the only thing that will get him out.”

You cocked an eyebrow at him. “What else then? Using Batman?”

“No, I have a trip down memory lane planned for us, something that will surely make him feel… nostalgic.”.

Nostalgia… 

What did he mean?

“Going back to old practices?”, you started to feel on edge, but covered it with indifference and annoyance. Though the annoyance was actually peeking through with every mysterious, open ended phrase he said. It made you want to punch him in the face. 

“No, I want to talk about our estranged relationship. I miss when he and I could play around and talk about life. I had my fun with him before, I think we’re over due for a reunion. It’ll be time for round two.”

“Round two?”, that piqued your interest, his entire spiel did. “You’ve gone head to head with him before?”

“We met for the first time maybe…. Five? No, six years ago. He wasn’t this stupid Hood character back then, but let me say, he had no originality back then either. He just stole someone else’s suit like now and made it his own.”

“Maybe he just likes to be a copycat. Can’t blame him, it’s easy to take over once someone is out of the picture. Reinventing the villain, you know.”, you rolled your eyes, annoyed that you were even entertaining him like this. Though a part of you wanted to know how exactly Joker and Red had met before. Was Red the reason Joker got put into Arkham?

“Reinventing is so boring. At least now it’s fun because I can kill him again!”

“Again?”, your brows furrowed. Joker.. killed Red?

Some of you found it hard to believe, another part wouldn’t believe it because if Red died, he would be about six feet under, not parading around the streets of Gotham looking to kill Joker. 

“I killed him once before but it was far more fun then. Didn’t even know it was him until I realized he was also going after the Bats!”

“If he’s supposed to be dead, how is he alive?”, you mocked. 

“I don’t know how he’s alive, but it doesn’t matter. He won’t be that way much longer.”

You crossed your arms, still looking at him from where he sat before turning and looking out the window at the city. 

“So, how did you kill him?”, you asked more out of genuine curiosity than care but still wanted to know more about Red. What you could from anyone that wasn’t him. 

“I blew him up!”, Joker’s hands made an exploding motion before he leaned forward and laughed. “Oh, I tied him up and beat him with a crowbar. He just laid there and took it like a champ! I must say it was boring, wish he would have fought a little more but hey, it was a fun party.”

“Was this before you were imprisoned in Arkham?”

“Wayyy before.”, he smiled at you with a maniacal smile before grabbing a pencil and messing with it. “I think it was around spring time, maybe April. Oh but it was snowing so who’s to say if it was actually in April.”

April… 

You looked at him, the tiniest sliver of realization clicking in your head. 

Six years ago…. April…

“So what, did he go by the Crimson Helmet or something stupid?”, you leaned on the desk slightly as you watched him, slowly losing patience in him and the conversation. 

“No, it was something funnier, like an animal or something.”

You raised an eyebrow at him . This man truly was delusional; he couldn't even remember the name of someone who’d given him this much trouble before. You rolled your eyes, finally getting away from the maniac and heading home.

“What was it…”, he muttered to himself. You pushed yourself off the desk, annoyed with the conversation as you walked towards the door, his words still ringing out. You wanted to sleep. You’d been here all night with them and this had gotten nowhere. Not to mention the rain was about to come down for the third time this week and you did not want to get caught in the rain again. 

“Rabbit… Rocket…”, he continued.

As you reached for the door, Joker stood in realization, his voice ripping through the silence as he laughed. You turned to look at him as he ran hands through his messy green hair and sucked in deep breaths to keep up with his laughter. Your hand was about to open the door before his voice forced you to pause. 

“I remember!”, he raised his voice. “He went by the Boy Blunder. The Bat’s little sidekick!”

You froze. 

Cold water dousing your skin, ice running through your veins. You felt the pit of your stomach drop as his words echoed within the walls of the room. Your heart was pounding in your chest, you felt your vision get hazy, your ears ringing in shock and disbelief as you slowly turned to look at Joker. He was still standing, his hands still through his hair as he walked over to the window and looking out. 

“Oh I remember, his bones cracked and he couldn’t talk, I’m guessing from all the blood in his collapsed lung and I broke a few ribs. He was far more rude than the first Boy Blunder, at least he had some manners.”

You felt the knife in your gut twist more with every word. The sinking realization flooding your body. The roof, the necklace, the earrings, the painting, the endless times he’d move you out of getting hurt, the way he refused to make any hit that would result in serious injury, the way he knew things about you that you’d never told him, after months…it all clicked. 

“You.. killed Batman’s sidekick?”

Joker’s wicked smile spread over his face, the skin stretching in a macabre and frightening way as he recalled the events of that night in the warehouse.

“Yes.”, he said in a dark, evil tone as his laugh cracked through the silence of the room. “And I can’t wait to do it again.”

A/N:

Hi everyone! I hope you've all had a great week and have had a good summer so far! Here is the next chapter! It's finally getting towards the ending, I think we have a handful of chapters before the series ends! Don't worry, I'm making sure it wraps up nicely!

Also I am also working on another mini series! Its a Jujutsu Kaisen mini series thats Sukuna x Reader so check that out if you like JJK!

Please keep the comments and messages coming, I love hearing from you guys!

See you next week xx.

[dandylovesturtles]

more Firelined propaganda, because I love them. as always, Firefight is owned by @remedyturtles

for the @tmntaucompetition

-----

Somehow, their teammates are stable. As far as Donnie can tell, this is pretty lucky, given the shape they were in. The other Leo still hasn't come out of his shell, though, eerily silent where he's cradled in the other Donnie's arms. He hasn't wanted to let go, even since they moved the both of them to a cot, and Donnie can't blame him.

There'd been some more running around, some more efforts to get them treated and comfortable, over the course of the last few hours. And now Donnie is pretty sure it's late (or he's experiencing some kind of interdimensional jetlag), and everyone but him is asleep. They'd found another cot and forced Leo, shaking and clearly low on energy reserves, into it; he'd fussed and insisted he wasn't tired, but the moment his head hit the pillow he was fast asleep. It was a little funny - the kind of thing they could chuckle about now, so many months into Leo's recovery. Raph had slumped against the wall and Mikey had climbed into his lap to nap there.

Donnie had promised them he'd join them soon enough. But so far he hasn't moved from his chair by their teammates' cot, typing away on his wrist tech and occasionally asking Shelldon to run some calculations for him.

At least, Donnie thought he was the only one awake, but the longer he sits there, the more he starts to feel the telltale prickle of someone watching him. His eyes rise from his screens and meet the gaze of the other Donnie, awake and observing him from the cot.

He lowers his wrist and gives a little wave of his fingers to the other Donnie. "Do you need more painkillers?" he asks quietly.

(He really needs a distinct designation for their counterparts. He remembers Leo floating the names "Leonother" and "Donatwollo" and shudders. For now, he decides to mentally refer to them as Donnie-β and Leo-β.)

Donnie-β shakes his head. His eyes float beyond Donnie, to where Leo is asleep in his cot. He points and makes a sign that Donnie assumes is his name sign for Leo-β (different from the name sign for his Leo, which is interesting), then waits to see if Donnie understands. At his nod, Donnie-β proceeds to sign, "Sleep, how?" as best as he can under the circumstances.

Donnie lets out a huff that's almost a laugh. "I'm guessing your Leo also suffers from insomnia?" Donnie-β nods. "As it turns out, chronic fatigue is a surprisingly effective cure." Donnie turns back and glances at Leo, sleeping away. "Usually, anyway..."

There are sometimes days Leo suffers from both, too tired to move but unable to sleep. He's always especially emotional on days like that, and Donnie knows he hates it, so he's glad Leo's brain is letting him sleep tonight.

When he looks back, Donnie-β has a complicated expression on his face that Donnie doesn't know how to begin to unpack. After several awkward seconds of silence, Donnie-β signs again, just, "How?" this time.

"How was he hurt?" Donnie clarifies, and Donnie-β nods again. "It was... the Dark Armor. Draxum put him inside." At the wide-eyed look of horror on Donnie-β's face, Donnie comes to the conclusion, "That didn't happen in your timeline, did it?"

Donnie-β shakes his head. It's not a surprise, at this point.

"It seems to be a unique event to our timeline, at least insofar as those assembled here are concerned," says Donnie, flipping through screens to bring up the research he's done on the alternate timelines here. "So far I know of one other timeline where Leo was put inside the armor, but their circumstances are substantially different from ours." He looks back at their teammates, taking in their substantial injuries, then asks, quietly, "This wasn't the Shredder, was it?"

Tired, Donnie-β shakes his head. Then, with a trembling hand, he fingerspells, "Krang."

"We've heard of them," Donnie tells him. "In other universes... Well, it seems like no one got off particularly easily."

It takes some fumbling from his position, but Donnie-β manages to sign, "Maybe not you," indicating the entire group when he does.

Donnie just shakes his head. "We aren't any more lucky than you guys," he says, which makes Donnie-β's mouth twitch in a motion that is at once humorous and grim.

Another few minutes of silence follows, during which Donnie goes back to looking at his screens, mostly to give Donnie-β the illusion of space. He can tell Donnie-β is thinking something over and trying to decide if he wants to bring it up (pretty weird to see that thought process play out on a mirror of his own face, actually), and he also knows it will be easier for him to come to a decision if he's not being stared at.

Finally, Donnie-β motions for his attention, and, once he has it, signs out, "Was it bad?" before indicating that he's talking about Leo. "Mentally, emotionally," he adds.

Donnie grimaces. Ah, no wonder he debated over saying anything... This isn't a topic Donnie is eager to discuss, either. But he has a feeling Donnie-β must have a reason for asking, so he's willing to talk. A little, anyway.

"Yes," he says. And then, because saying it all out loud is starting to feel dangerous, he turns off his wrist tech and switches to modified ASL (luckily, other than the name signs, Donnie-β's version has been close enough for him to follow so far). "It was bad."

Donnie-β looks at Leo, hesitancy written all over his expression. "Can you tell me?" he finally signs, with shaky hands, like he's not sure he wants to know about it but has to ask.

Donnie hesitates, too. Talking about his brother's mental health issues to other people without Leo's permission is a line he would not normally cross. Leo deserves to control who has that kind of information about him, and in what circumstances they're told. In this situation, he doesn't think Leo would mind, but still...

He decides on a compromise. "I can tell you how it was for me."

Perhaps Donnie-β understands the thought process that led here, because he nods and doesn't press for more.

Donnie takes a deep breath and lets it out slow. Thinking about that time, at the beginning of Leo's recovery, is stressful and comes with no small amount of shame. But he can do it, if it will help someone else with their own troubles.

"He was struggling," Donnie signs, because that much he knows is safe to tell, "and I didn't understand. I pushed too hard. I needed him to heal on my timeline. I wanted things to be normal. I wanted to go back to how it was before."

He chews on his lip, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. "I was scared. I felt like I was losing someone. I wanted my Leo," he uses his own name sign for Leo, then points to be sure Donnie-β knows who he means, "back. I wasn't ready to accept I wasn't getting him back."

Donnie-β's face seemed to drain of color, and he hugged Leo-β to his chest ever tighter. Donnie could only imagine what was going though his counterpart's head.

"Mikey," he fingerspells the name for Donnie-β's benefit, "said I was in mourning." He shrugs exaggeratedly - not because he doesn't believe Mikey, but because feelings have never been his area of expertise. "And that was okay. But I needed to love Leo where he is now."

He glances back at his brother, still sleeping soundly. He feels his heart swell when he does - that part, at least, had been easy.

"Leo is different now. And I love him." Donnie makes the sign for "love" extra exaggerated, to add as much emphasis as he can. "Who he is now. As much. More." He glances over his shoulder again and smiles at Leo.

Donnie-β listens. He puts his chin on Leo-β's shell, tapping out the same message to him again.

"...Scared," he rasps out loud, and his voice barely works; Donnie has to lean in to hear. But Donnie-β seems unwilling now to take his hands off Leo-β. "Of losing him for good."

Donnie's own stomach drops at the idea. He gives his head a firm shake, like that will banish it entirely, for both of them.

"You won't," he says. "You'll save him."

Donnie-β looks hauntingly unsure. "How do you know?" he whispers.

"Because you're Donatello Hamato," says Donnie fiercely, "and you can do anything."

Donnie-β doesn't smile, or laugh, or react in any way a Donnie might normally. Donnie supposes that Leo-β isn't the only one who's going to be different now.

But he nods, seriously, his hand keeping up the gently taps on Leo-β's shell.

"Wouldn't want... to give Donnies a bad name," he murmurs.

"That's right," says Donnie, a sigh in his voice. "And - not to sound like Raph here - but maybe you should start by getting some rest yourself."

Donnie-β lets out a noise that is close enough to an annoyed huff it makes Donnie smile.

"If anything happens-"

"We'll wake you. Don't worry."

A nod. Donnie-β's eyelids droop.

He's asleep soon, curled around Leo-β's shell even in slumber. Donnie makes sure the blankets are tucked firmly around both of them, then stretches.

"Shelldon, wake me if anything changes."

"Sure thing, dude."

Donnie looks at Raph and Mikey's mini-turtle pile, then turns back to Leo's cot. It's not really big enough for two, but without his battle shell Donnie is pretty sure he can make it work.

He tucks himself in behind Leo. Leo makes a soft noise in his sleep, turning over and curling into Donnie instinctively.

Donnie would never want anyone else for a Leo. He knows Donnie-β feels the same about Leo-β. And that's why Donnie can rest - believing, eventually, they would be okay.

[arandomaquarius]

Kay so before I get into this rant I just wanna say that I’m definitely back on my bullshit again and to take this post with a grain of salt lmao it’s late and insomnia has struck once again warnings in tags

So! I want to point out something I’ve noticed in Transformers: Prime. Specifically about Knock Out and his relationship with Megatron and Starscream. Specifically about the abuse he endured on the Nemesis.

Now, it’s common knowledge that Megatron was physically abusive towards Starscream. However, I’ve seen a few fan made things saying that he was abusive towards Knock Out. Now while we have canonical proof of this in the case of Starscream, we do not have any for Knock Out. The closest thing we get is that one scene where Megatron picks Knock Out up from underneath his chassis (much like you would pick someone up by their shirt). But that happened when dark energon was coursing through his body, changing his actions and thought patterns. There was also the time that he shot at Knock Out after he retrieved the shield, but I’m not sure if that counts. Otherwise, Megatron never laid a servo on Knock Out (as far as I can remember right now.)

Of course, physical abuse isn’t just hitting someone. It’s using your body to threaten and intimidate another being or to make them feel inferior. There are many examples of Megatron doing this to all of his troops (save the Waves and Predaking). So as for that part of being physically abusive, Megatron fits the bill!

The type of abuse that Megatron uses the most is verbal abuse. The demeaning remarks, the intentional mentions of past events that have clearly left a mental mark, insults, threats, everything. He is degrading Knock Out (because this post is mostly about Knock Out not Screamer sorry Screamer enjoyers) with his comments and he knows it. He’s doing it on purpose, and that’s what makes it abuse. This is a very common type of abuse, despite the media focusing on physical abuse the most. Megatron never lays a servo on KO, but his words do enough.

Starscream, however, does both. He insults and demeans Knock Out the first episode he appears in! He obviously learned this abusive behavior from Megatron after serving under him for so long, but he ramps it up. The way Starscream gets in KO’s personal space; the way he used the spark extractor to scare him more than once; the time he hurt Knock Out after he street raced; when he hit KO after the Omega Lock got destroyed; how he threatened him in Thirst; and more that I’ve probably missed.

Point is, out of the two, Megatron has treated Knock Out better. Starscream has been more manipulative and abusive towards him than Megatron was. Megatron very rarely got physical, while Starscream didn’t hesitate to get in Knock Out’s face and use his (not by a lot) superior height to intimidate and threaten him. Megatron made snide remarks and brought up painful reminders, and he was abusive in this way, but not really physically. And I say really because he was still shit, but he didn’t physically hurt KO as much as Starscream did.

This is important for their dynamics because Knock Out kept aligning himself with Starscream when it came to betraying Megatron. Despite Megatron not being as physical as Starscream. I dunno if it was ever explained why Knock Out did this, but I do know that abusive relationships are difficult to get out of and that many stay because it is familiar and they believe that they deserve it. I don’t think KO thinks he deserves all the pain he gets from Starscream: he just doesn’t strike me as that mech. However, I think Knock Out was comfortable where he was and felt he could correctly gauge whether or not he was in enough danger that he would need to leave the safety of the Decepticon ranks. The Decepticons were in control of the energon supply, therefore the winning team and where Knock Out was safest and most comfortable. He likes luxury, so it was a no brainer for him: security, a place to keep up his finish, and plenty of energon; or no security, no way to keep his finish flawless, and barely any energon?

Anyways, all this to say that Knock Out suffered abuse at the hands of Starscream and Megatron, although Megatron’s was less severe than Starscream’s. We need to talk about it more and acknowledge that Starscream, while being an abuse victim, is also an abuser. You can be both. Just because you are/were abused doesn’t excuse you if you are also abusive. Knock Out could have continued this cycle, but he didn’t. And as far as I’m concerned, post-Predacons Rising Knock Out is living his best goddamn life on Cybertron.

thanks for coming to my Ted talk! If you have any additions, feel free to add them

[aetherdoesthings]

hello!!! i hope you're having a good day!

i've been suffering from insomnia for a while, and i can't really get a good night's sleep. can i request a female insomniac reader x nico robin? like i love her so much i would die for her. general hcs are fine as well if u don't wanna write a lot.

thank you!!

hello anon!! thanks, i had an okay day today! i'm sorry to hear that you're suffering from insomnia, i hope you feel better. i would literally die for robin too like 🤭

forethoughts: ahhhhhh debating if i should a. write luffy x reader part 3, b. write hanahaki au!reader x robin part 1, c. practice my cello. hmmmm.

notes: fem!reader, platonic-y with suggestive romance

You wanted to sleep.

You needed to sleep.

Ever since you joined the Straw Hat Pirates, you’ve been having some sleeping problems. Maybe it was because of the waves that made you seasick, or the occasional sound of the wood creaking that shook you, making you think the ship was about to crash. You were always a light sleeper before you joined the Straw Hats, but it got worse.

You had asked the resident doctor on the ship for a remedy, after accepting that two sleepless nights might not help you have a good performance the next day. 

A notable example and sign that told you you needed help was during one day, when Nami was doing a ‘routine cleaning’ to make sure we weren’t keeping any junk that would attract bugs and all that. As you were sorting out what you wanted to throw out and what you wanted to keep, you mixed up both piles. If it wasn’t for Robin catching you holding a box of all your clothes and prized possessions into the giant trash bag, you would’ve lost a lot of clothes and trinkets you adored.

Chopper had given you some pills to take to help you sleep, advising you to drink some sort of tea and do meditation before you would rest. You decided to listen to him, as you sat on your bed, taking the pills and the tea, focusing on your breathing for a good ten minutes, before lying back down, closing your eyes.

You immediately woke up the moment a wave hit the boat, forcing you to sit up as you let out a frustrated groan, mad at your incapability to just relax. It was 12am. Everyone should be asleep, aside from the ones keeping watch. You decide to make use of your time, venturing out of your room and finding a more comfortable place than your own bed to sleep in. 

Your legs absentmindedly made their way to the resident archaeologist’s place, your hand turning the doorknob and entering the library. You expected the lights to be off, as Robin was already asleep at this time. However, to your surprise, the lights were on, and the archaeologist herself was sitting on the couch, reading a book. 

Robin glanced up at you from her book, a small smile on her face. “Ah, Y/N, may I help you? It’s quite late; you should be asleep.”

You try to close the door and head back into your room and bury yourself in embarrassment, but it’s too late. You closed the door behind you, looking down at the ground. “Uhm… I was trying to find a place to sleep… I didn’t know you were here. I’ll go, I’m sorry for intruding.”

Before you could place your hand on the door knob, a hand that sprouted from the door prevented you from doing so.

“Please. You’re not intruding; I was just wrapping up.” Robin smiled warmly at you. “Are you having a hard time sleeping again?”

“Y-Yeah… I am… How did you know?” You raised an eyebrow, wondering if Robin had occasionally sprouted a hand with an eye in it, staring at you tossing and turning in bed.

“Your behavior in the day reflects your rest during the night. And let’s just say… you haven’t been the same ever since you joined. And ever since that little mishap during Nami’s cleaning day… I had a suspicion you were having a hard time sleeping.” Robin stated matter-of-factly, her voice warm and lulling.

You scratched the back of your head, looking away. “Chopper already gave me some meds…”

“Is it working?”

“No…” You shook your head, relenting to the fact that Robin was now fully aware of your sleeping problems. Of course Robin would catch onto your problem; she never misses anything when it came to you. So what’s the point of even hiding it from her, then?

“I tried sleeping just now… taking the pills and trying to meditate. I still can’t… the waves just keep jolting me back awake, I don’t know what to do.” You exasperated, leaning against the door as you held your tired head.

“Come. Sit with me.” Robin patted the empty seat beside her on the couch, as a hand helped put her book away. Reluctantly, you trudged towards the archaeologist, creating a dip in the couch. You sat with your knees pressed against each other, your back not pressing against the cushions. 

“I don’t bite.” Robin smiled at your effort to use as little space as possible, patting the spot that was directly next to her. “Please.”

You moved closer to her, until her shirt brushed against your shoulder, the scent of fresh ink and flowers making your body relax. Robin always made you feel as comfortable as possible; she let you nap on her during the day (which probably helped contribute to her speculation about your sleeping problems), always checked in on you to make sure you were drinking enough water or weren’t about to accidentally hurt yourself.

“Why don’t you try sleeping with me tonight?” Robin nonchalantly suggested. 

Your face flushed red, as you furiously shook your head. “Y-You don’t need to do that. I-It’s fine, I couldn’t possibly ask you to sacrifice your space in order to help me sleep-”

“I’m not sacrificing anything, Y/N. Your sleep matters to me. Lie down on my lap. Don’t be shy. It might help you.”

“I’m not sure-”

Several hands gently push you against Robin’s body, making you lie down on her soft lap, your body curled into a fetal position as you laid down on the couch. A blanket was placed on top of your body, several hands tucking you in as Robin placed a hand on your head. She intertwined her fingers and your hair, gently patting your head to get you more comfortable and relaxed. Your shoulders slumped, as your legs moved away from your chest, letting the warmth and comfort Robin gave you seep into your body.

“Shall I read you a story? Perhaps that could lull you to sleep.” Robin suggested.

“S-Sure…” You replied, as you felt your eyelids getting more heavy the more Robin petted your head.

With the help of her hands, Robin picked up the book she was reading, as she began to read it out loud, her soft and elegant voice filling your ears, making your brain calm down, your muscles relaxing. You let yourself close your eyes, letting down your guard in front of the archaeologist. The deeper she got into the story, the sooner you felt yourself succumb into a slumber.

Your body jolted the moment a wave crashed into the Sunny, your head rising from Robin’s lap. But since she had your head in her hand, she gently forced you back down, giving you a warm and reassuring smile.

“It’s okay. It’s just a wave. It’s alright, you’re safe.” Robin whispered. 

You let out a shaky breath, nodding your head to let Robin know she could continue reading her story. You were safe. Safe. Safe in Robin’s hand. Safe with Robin. You were safe. 

Another wave hit the ship, but this time you didn’t flinch or move. You were safe. As long as you were with Robin, you were safe. You closed your eyes, feeling Robin’s warmth and inhaling her scent as you slowly drifted off into a well deserved slumber.

“Y/N…?” Robin whispered softly. You looked adorable in her arms; head resting on her lap, eyes closed and blanket covering your body. She couldn’t help but smile at your form, as she placed her book down. With her own hands, she scooped up your tiny body, carrying you back to her room, laying you down on her bed before crawling in next to you. 

“Goodnight, my dear.” Robin let out a deep breath, as she closed her eyes too.

[childlikegoblinqueen]

Writing Notes: Writing Sweet Child vs Stranger Tides OR Riding The Wave vs. Running Up That Hill.

Sooooooooo back in late October of 2022, I was dealing with some stuff and my brain rot was cycling between TOH and Stranger Things S4 (and Russian Doll a little).

I decided as a way of channeling my unstable emotions that I would participate in NaNoWriMo by writing a fanfic set during the summer that the Hexsquad was stuck in the human realm, which if it was Summer 2022 would have coincided with Stranger Things S4 dropping on Netflix.

The thought was, “Hey! What if these traumatized kids watch this show with other traumatized kids and realize they can relate?”

I didn’t plan on writing another fanfic after ….

😬

More below.

But then the idea for Sweet Child began to itch my brain and it went from a short fluffy idea to something much bigger.

With Stranger Tides, I had a very clear series of ready made plot points right out of the gate. I was following the path of Stranger Things Seasons 1-4, so while it wasn't a cross over, I knew I had to hit certain points, which I broke into a few different sequences.

1. The Upside Down.

2. The Gate.

3. The Demogorgon.

4. The Mind Flayer.

5. Vecna

6. The Piggy Back.

7. For the Future (The epilogue).

Without spoilers for those who haven't read it, these were not in the literal sense (mostly). For instance, the first part "The Upside Down" more referred to how returning to the Human Realm after everything that had happened felt to Luz like she was existing in a familiar place that looked like home but felt distorted due to her depression.

It was my NaNoWriMo project, so I knew I needed to finish in a month (I TOTALLY DID! At almost 150K words!) And I wanted it to hit the feel of pop-culture nostalgia while still being distinctly TOH.

It helped that I had insomnia. I also began writing to music.

Stranger Tides was told from the rotating POVs of Luz, Vee, and Hunter -- though Camila got a few chapters as well. There were some call backs to canon from S1 to Thanks to Them... The different POVs allowed me to show how different characters reacted to different situations. It also gave me a chance to explore Vee's feelings of resentment for having to give up her Cabin 7 friends who knew her as Luz because the real Luz had returned. That's where Masha, Ryan and Josh came in.

So, after a month I finished it! It followed a horror/thriller type of pattern. I edited it in December and dropped it over a period of days and was happy.

Until For the Future Came out and I wanted to return to the sandbox of TOH.

While it was supposed to be a one shot fluff piece about Hunter getting encouragement from everyone around him on fatherhood, a few more questions began to pop up in my mind, and Sweet Child was born.

Sweet Child differs in a few ways. First, it's not a continuation of ST, but it shares a few elements. Pop Culture. Music. Media and real world issues popping up. But it's really from one POV. Other than the clips of media, it's Hunter's story about becoming a dad and dealing with a past that won't die, trust issues, family, and a tabloid media that looks to exploit the abuse of his youth.

It's also a bit more of a slow burn. Threads were dropped in Stranger Tides that came together in the end, but since I am not on a deadline (I have to get back to the opening chapter while hitting some plot points I've set out for myself) I am taking my time and REALLY fleshing out the world and the story. I get to take time with the relationships.

I tend to read a lot of horror and thrillers, so I see this word count climb and I get nervous. I worry that if I was to go to the shelf and look at this as a book I would immediately feel intimidated. I worry that readers will see the word and chapter count and not want to touch it.

On the other hand, telling this story is -- like it was for Stranger Tides -- therapeutic and I know how it ends -- and I want to GET to that ending in the best way possible. Which is why I need to just make like Elsa and let it go.

We are GETTING THERE! I PROMISE! I have it all laid out.

Still? I feel like parenthood is a long and winding road. One that fits with character development for so many of the TOH characters I love! So I'm walking that road with Hunter and Willow and all the others. If the story demands me to take a few forks to make the payoff all the more satisfying, I am going to write them out!

See you all tomorrow for Chapter 64!

[jodilin65]

I’ve got a few things to update on, but first I’ll get the nightmare out of the way that has me worried. How I wish I wasn’t psychic and had the luxury of writing it off as just a simple nightmare! But I know better. Every time I have a certain kind of nightmare where I’m about to die, something bad ends up happening to me. I just had the THIRD drowning dream I’ve had this year. After the last one in February, I got the norovirus. After the first one In January, I had an anxiety spell for about a week. So yeah, definitely worried and wondering what it could mean. I just hope I don’t have them every month!

My guess is that I’m in for another round of anxiety because it isn’t very often that I get hit with the norovirus. There aren’t that many things it could be, but I’m glad that Tom wasn’t in the nightmare because whenever there’s a deadly nightmare that involves both of us, something bad happens that affects us both. But whatever’s coming, it’s on me and I’m definitely worried and nervous about it. But at the same time, the sucky thing about being the kind of psychic I am is that there’s nothing I can do about it. I can’t change it. I can’t stop it.

So in the dream, I was walking along these boulders that ran alongside the ocean somewhere. There was a big boulder that sloped downward and I lost my footing as I was going down it and fell flat on my ass. Then a huge wave came and swept me out to sea. It just came crashing down on me and snatched me right off the rock and the harder and faster I tried to swim back to the rocks, the more waves would come and engulf me in them, sucking me further away. So it was a pretty scary dream.

I also had a dream that I was thinking of Maliheh and how she died when she was 47. But in real life, I last talked to her when she was in her 50s and now she would be in her 60s.

Then I had a dream that I walked into a fish market and started to tell an Asian woman that I usually buy bags of frozen tilapia filets and asked if they’d be cheaper there. She started to have this gross look on her face before she turned and walked off like she was going to look for the answer to that but never came back.

I woke up tired today because I was up for 18 hours yesterday and only slept for 6. This happens sometimes and I’m always tired when it does, so I can’t really judge today. However, I may be on to something as far as the vitamins go - especially vitamin D - and its connection to anxiety and fatigue. I started taking a multivitamin 4 days ago and have noticed a general increase in energy and that’s part of why I was up late. That’s the downside to having energy is that when I have it, I sometimes have insomnia. So, I can’t win either way. It’s like I’m tired because I don’t have enough of this or that whether it’s thyroid or vitamins, and also tired because I have insomnia at times. But in general, it does seem like there may be a connection to it boosting my thyroid and energy levels which in turn can lead to anxiety. I took multivitamins during the worst of my anxious years after going on levothyroxine. Plus, I was adding vitamin D to the mix at times, not knowing that vitamin D can enhance thyroid function. So I could have been fueling my anxiety without knowing it by flooding my system with too much and pushing myself into a range that for me personally, left me wired and anxious. I’m now hoping that while this may be a little too optimistic, I can find that comfort zone between the very fine line between helpful and hurtful, and whenever I start feeling sluggish, I can increase the vitamins, and then decrease them when I feel like I might be getting close to becoming anxious. I’m seriously wondering after all these years if there could really be a connection. I don’t feel anxious now but feel I could be getting close, so I think I’ll skip tomorrow’s vitamins. I just don’t want to push it.

The more I look at it, the more I can see that Ray didn’t clear the side or back of his place in preparation for gravel. If you really look at it, you can see that it’s just greener on our side because of the way the ground is and the way the water pools toward our sidewalk when it rains, and not that it’s been intentionally cleared.

The honker is definitely getting serious with his girlfriend. He didn’t take the motorcycle out all weekend and I guess I have her to thank for that. I don’t know what she does during the week and from what I learned, she’s a few years older than him.

He sometimes walks down to her place since it’s not that far and of course, the dog is alone more and sometimes howls. Tonight it was just one howl.

Still wonder how this relationship is going to affect his going home. I just can’t imagine getting all serious with someone and then having them be like, “Okay, I’m going up to Canada. I’ll be back in 6 months,” but maybe she’s okay with that. Maybe she’ll eventually go up with him. I don’t know the nature of their relationship but if it’s that serious and they ever have a nasty break-up, you would think it would be rather awkward living so close to the person but that’s on them.

Between the girlfriend and highs of around 40 with lows of around 30 where he’s from, I can see why he would be in no hurry to get home.

I’m still hearing Happy every day. I don’t know why it’s been a daily thing again, but I haven’t heard it go on for more than a few seconds after that one time it went on for several minutes. I guess some people just think it’s pretty damn funny or don’t realize just how annoying it can be.

I asked AI to give me a list of adult communities in Florida that do not allow motorcycles or dogs and it gave me a list of 20 places. I don’t know how accurate it is and I know that policies can change. I wish we had this option when we first moved here, although at that time, we were desperate to get out of the last place as noisy as it was and we only had so much money to play around with after staying in hotels for a month. But if we ever had more money and could take our time looking since we wouldn’t be desperate to escape this place and wouldn’t have plane tickets and hotels eating up some of our money from the sale of the place, things may be different. It may be easier to get more of what we want as long as the flight path isn’t any lower.

Looking at it realistically, I don’t see us ever moving. I would still like a place that was a little bigger and with an indoor washer and dryer but I just don’t see it. Then he pointed out how we never would’ve thought COVID would lead him into early retirement and us out of the “house of terror” where my scariest moments and memories live. I’ll never forget that OMG moment when I was casually pacing through the house when it hit me that there was no longer anything holding us there. It was like a prison door had popped open just like that and we were free. And I’ll never forget that emotional flight from the brown drought-stricken West to the lush green East, on the very side of the plane I saw us on in my dreams.

So surprises and rare circumstances can and do come up. I’m not expecting us to ever have money again but I realize I may one day be surprised, even if I don’t know where it would come from with him not working. Would we win it? Either way, I need to have goals and dreams to hope for and to strive for. I don’t want to be locked in and feel like this is it forever no matter what. If it was, that’s fine, but I prefer knowing I had options. Even if you’re in a great place, knowing you have other options is always good. That way, you don’t feel like life’s over and you’re locked in forever.

While it would be great if I could suddenly be near Jessie, I’m hesitant to bother for three reasons. First, we may be childhood friends, but we’re not exactly that close, especially in comparison to how close Aly and I were. Secondly, I don’t want to be close to Cape Canaveral and its plans to increase rocket launches. Lastly, we wouldn’t get warmer winters there, so if anything, I would head South if we remained in Florida and unless we’re ever surprised with enough money to get us to Hawaii or lost our place in a hurricane or tornado, I don’t see why we would leave Florida. If we did but didn’t go to Hawaii, I don’t know where we would go. I guess I would aim for either a place that rained a lot or a desert somewhere. I just wouldn’t go to any state I’ve already lived in because that wouldn’t be adding new experiences and variety to my life.

Back to finish my fun-filled weekend of increasing my waistline and chances of becoming diabetic, although the waistline isn't going anywhere. My weight actually went back down again, even with Lorna Doones and coffee ice cream.

[soft-boi-eli]

Hello Hello!

I just wanted to say I love your fics!

ALSO!

Could I request a CC!SBI X Gn! Insomniac Reader! Where the reader is an insomniac (Obviously-) but is somehow a pro at MC!

Like they are basically god at the game! They also REALLY enjoy horror games! They don’t get scared easily and LOVE horror movies! They basically love anything horror/creepy-

ANYWAYS!!

The reader lives off of ramen and Monster energy drinks (For fun-)! They have a Twitch (Which has about 18 mil followers and 14 mil subs!) and a YouTube channel (Which has 20 mil followers!)

They mainly play horror games (Obviously-) and MC!

You can do headcanons or scenarios/images with the SBI! Maybe like playing a horror game together or MC? OR! Maybe some things they do together? Or when they meet up? Or-to many ideas Nightmare-

ANYWAYS!

I don’t really care! And don’t worry about taking too long on it!

ALSO!

Maybe we could be friends? Only if you want too!

Remember to eat, drink, and get enough sleep!

<3

Yes. I lovesthese ideas and I'm gonna choose headcannons due to they are a bit easierfor me to write.

And yes I'm perfectly fine with being your friend! I'm actually happy to make friends on this app so yeah!

Pronouns:nonbinary

Tw: cussing. Insomia, mentions of horror movies. Mention of horror games. Fluff.

SBI with a horror streamer friend head cannons.

*Ahem* tommy wanted to paly a game with you so you choose a game that didn't look like horror until the middle. He screamed at the jump scare and it made both of your chats so happy.

When phil decides to play with you there is literally a silence after a jump scare. Everyone thought he had a heart attack and honestly so did you until he spoke up about accidently hitting his mute button when he jumped.

Wilbur. He's a bit better then tommy but more scared then phil would be. Any little noise won't get him but when it starts to get noticeable the noiseless to him. The jump scare, he'd fall out of his seat and stay on the ground for a bit. You ask if he's good and he literally doesn't answer. He's dead. You killed him. Congrats.

Techno. He'd handle them a bit better then everyone else. Not as good as you but heisnt very paranoid. He literally runs at the noises trying to get jumpscared. While you run after him telling him to stop because if he doesn't then you'd lose and die. And technoblade never dies.

If you all play together both tommy and wilbur pussy out. Techno last the longest and phil the second longest. While you remain the ruler of horror games.

Now how you all met was dream invited you to the dream smp to add to the chaos. Needless to say it got extremely chaotic due to you being on almost 24 hours. You first ran into techno. He seemed confused and skeptical.

You both found eachothers love for potatoes. You set up camp quote close to techno but not too close.

Phil popped in when he needed something for a build and noticed a new name. Talked to you in chat and asked to join your VC. You both found each other talking for a bit.

Wilbur was next. Wilbur got curious over the new person and just hoppedinto the same VC as you techno and phil. He was quick to realize that you were a famous youtuber. Mainly for your horror videos and your extreme Parkcore skills.

In minecraft that is.

Tommy noticing that all of you were in the same VC joined in with shouting. He was low key jealous that everyone was obsessed with you. Then he saw why.

You literally cracked jokes at his shouting.

"Is that an angry pomeranian? Nah nah. It's an angry child. Even better an angry blonde!" - you.

He was shocked and immediately started joking and laughing with you. He wasn't fully angry for long.

Now about your diet. When they heard that you had only eaten ramen and drank angry drinks they were concerned. You lived quite close to techno so when you guys met up he was shocked that you looked as healthy as you did.

He hated the fact that you literally didn't eat anything else.

You told him occasionally you have something other then ramen but you were just too lazy to really cook anything and that you didn't feel like burning the house down.

One month phil, tommy, wilbur, and techno decided to organize a month long sleep over so that they could celebrate your birthday. Phil being quote the father figure cooked different, but easy dinners every night just so you didn't eat only ramen that day.

When they actually arrived though you got a text from Phil asking about your address in your dms. Not think much of it you just sent him your location.

You were going to take a small nap. Just to bost your energy before you went and streamed later that night.

As you were sleeping there was a car heading to your house.

Phil, wilbur, tommy, and techno were all just existing in the car. And when they arrived to your house they didn't expect to actually see a clean house.

You woke to a loud knock.

When you opened the door in your half dazed state you expected a package. But to see four people standing on your porch.

You nearly jumped out of your skin.

You were stuck there blinking at them.

Finally snapping out of it you let them in. Confused on why in the ever loving fuck they were here.

Phil explained they were here to celebrate your 21st birthday and they were here for a month.

You stared at them for a while. Confused on what to do since you haven't had people over in almost 2 years.

But you got use to it.

So when you got done streaming and smelled something other then ramen you were thrown off guard. Like what was that. I haven't smelled that in years.

But after the second day you got use to it too.

For your birthday phil literally made a feast.

Like he found your favorite food other then ramen and cooked it. With that he prepared everything you could dream of.

Your sleeping habits. Let's dig into those.

I'm in no place to talk as right now it's 3:05 in the morning. And here I am.

But when they are over they don't let you stay up till no 3-4 in the morning. They all know the importance of sleep.

But there are those nights where no once can sleep and it results in a late night stream. And streaming for hours none the less.

The amount of accidental all nighters everyone has pulled was immense. But that's what happens with jet lag, adhd, and insomnia.

Literally you get tired randomly. Sleep for only 3 hours. Wake up. Drink coffee, energy drinks, highly caffeinated tea. And don't sleep till late at night.

Pillow forts.

It's a must and it happens. Horror movies, pillow forts, and snacks. Like you all are in this massive fort, watching horror movies, one by one you all are falling asleep. You and techno were the last up due to technos active mind and your body not letting you sleep.

You two literally just vide there, changing the movies from horror to some silly animated movies, like how to train your dragon, frozen, Luca, and many others.

You two pull an all nighter and it's actually a bet to see how long anyone else takes to notice.

You bet an hour. Techno says all day.

You won. Philza notices the worse eye bags under both you and technos eyes and immediately starts scolding.

He is papa bird and he won't let anyone of his children neglect their needs.

"Did you even drink water at all? You guys should of been sleeping not binge watching horror movies all night!" -philza

You could only offer a smirk, along with a laugh.

"I think we did I just can't fully remember. Also we were watching animated films. Not horror. Surprised you didn't wake up to let it go." - you.

You turn to techno.

"You owe me 15 bucks pig boy!"-you again.

Handing you the money he rolls his eyes. "Yeha yeah. Rub it in." -techno.

Ah yeah they found a horror game that you were scared of surprisingly. It was actually surprisingly you hadn't played it yet.

Outlast.

You had been holding off that game until you finished your other one but here you were. Bored out of your mind.

So you decided fuck it.

That game teriffed the shit out of you. It was so good though.

When you screamed they all came rushing up due to the fact that you never scream.

They say you out of your chair, on the floor, blinking. They thought you were hurt.

But you sat up and looked at your computer.

"Damn. That was actually really good." When you looked behind you and found the boys all staring you smiled and waved.

"You need something?"-you

"You screamed. We heard a thud. We thought you fuckin died!" -tommy.

"No I'm alive. My soul almost divorced my body but it's still quite here."-you

That day made highlights.

The popular y/n actually got jump scared. The one person who never screamed at horror games screamed.

When they left you were sad yes but they were still your best friends. Ready to talk when ever you want.

Sometimes I think that you guys talk all through out the night. Them forgetting that you were actually in a different time zone.

Sometimes they pop into your streams, be it MC, horror, you just talking to your fans, or even the once in the blue moon, cheerful games.

They just pop in and start talking to you. And you talk back like they were there since the beginning.

Phil is now one of your moderators too. Along with tommy, wilbur, and techno. When they pop in they make sure no one picks on you.

And since you are now close to the SBI. You are now part of it.

You didn't choose the fans did. But they are your new family. No matter what.

Even if they disagree with your eating habit.

Or energy drink addiction.

Or insomnia.

Or you mainly playing horror games.

Or you basically living in your streaming room.

Or even the nearly 24 hour streams.

I could go on but I'm not gonna.

I'm tired. But I can sleep. 2 days and I get to have a tour of my new school.

And it took so long to finally get into it.

We have been going through a huge hassle even before school started to get me enrolled.

And then we had to get me into this program.

But now on Monday I get to go in. Get a tour. Then start either Tuesday or Wednesday.

Anyway hope you liked. It's now 3:50 and it's no proof read I'm sorry

[fanoftheimagines]

The Ordeal of Being Known

The Ordeal of Being Known

Part of the Teal & Orange Writing Challenge

Pairing: Oluwande Boohari/Jim Jimenez/Reader

Prompts: “It’s late. Shouldn’t you be asleep?”

Reader Gender: Gender Neutral

CW: insomnia, implied trauma, thoughtfulness, trust issues, Google-translate Spanish, pre-relationship, vulnerability, the terrifying ordeal of being known, fluff

Word Count: 874

Summary: When you’ve got insomnia, Olu and Jim help you get some long-needed sleep.

A/N: I have sleep issues and I am so desperate for a full night of sleep. I would absolutely love to have Olu and Jim to help.

Masterlist

Teal & Orange Writing Challenge Masterlist

Sleep and you had never gotten along. The slow roll of the sea was often enough to help lull you to sleep, but sometimes, no matter how tired you were, you just couldn’t seem to fall asleep. Not even the Captain’s nighttime stories helped. This was one of those nights. You’d spent hours rolling back and forth in your hammock, just trying to get comfortable enough to get some form of sleep. But it never came.

And finally, you just decided to give up. You were never going to get any sleep with everyone else’s little snores and murmurings. Careful not to make too much noise, you climbed out of your hammock and tip-toed out of the room.

The nighttime air was pleasantly cool, especially in comparison to the oppressive sun and stifling heat yesterday. It was nice against your skin and helped relax some of the tension in your body.

You leaned against the railing and took a deep breath. Your forearms rested on the railing and your eyes were closed. Buttons was somewhere on the poop deck talking to Karl. His voice was just barely audible from your place at the opposite end of the ship. It was quieter out here, with only the ocean and Buttons making any noise.

You laid your forehead against the railing too. You just couldn’t let your guard down surrounded by all those people. It didn’t matter if they were your crew, or that you spent every waking moment together, or that you trusted them with your life. You just didn’t trust them enough to sleep. Maybe it was the vulnerability of it all, the having to let your guard down long enough to get a full night’s sleep. The only people on the entire ship that you even felt close to that level of trust with were Jim and Olu.

A wave of exhaustion hit you. You wanted to sleep so badly. Maybe you could sleep outside tonight…

Footsteps and the sound of wood creaking had your eyes shooting open. You darted up and turned to the doorway. The second you saw Olu’s familiar figure come into view, you deflated, turned back around, and leaned against the railing again.

“Hey,” Olu said quietly, “it’s late. Shouldn’t you be asleep?”

You nodded and sighed. “Can’t.”

He hummed and came up next to you. “Anything I can do to help?”

“No, not unless you’ve got an extra room somewhere I don’t know about.” You joked, resting your head on your upper arm to look over at him.

He didn’t respond at first. It was clear he was thinking – it was written all over his face. He smiled slightly. A cute little smile like he had the perfect idea. He tapped your arm.

“Come on,” he said, nudging you again. You raised an eyebrow. “Well?” You rolled your eyes and stood, motioning for him to proceed.

You followed him back into the dark ship. The halls weren’t lit this time of night, so you walked behind Olu almost blindly. He stopped in front of Jim’s door. You raised an eyebrow at him again. He couldn’t be serious? Could he? Jim liked their privacy. You couldn’t just barge in because of your insomnia.

He knocked twice, ignoring your whispered protests. There was a heavy pause. Then, the door cracked open and Jim’s sleep-filled face appeared.

“¿Qué quieres?” What do you want? Their voice was wonderfully gravelly – you purposefully ignored the stirring butterflies in your stomach at the sound.

“Can we stay in here tonight?” Olu asked, “Roach is snoring again.”

Jim looked you both over before nodding and opening the door wide enough for you both to pass through. Olu went straight to the spare bed and started getting comfortable. Meanwhile, you just stood in the middle of the room, unsure what to do with yourself.

Jim placed a hand on your shoulder. “Hey, ¿qué pasa?” What’s wrong? They asked softly.

You instinctively looked down at your hands. You weren’t used to this vulnerability, this level of trust. But you trusted them so much. “Insomnia. Haven’t had a good night in a few days.”

Jim glanced over at Olu. “What can we do to help?”

You shrugged. Honestly, you had no idea. Nothing had ever really helped. “Maybe just being here will help.” You paused. This was the feeling. The terrifyingly welcome ordeal of being known. Of being vulnerable with the people you care so deeply about. “I can’t sleep when I don’t feel safe.” The you make me feel safe went unspoken.

Jim hummed with a small smile as if they understood. With gentle guiding hands, they led you to the extra hammock hanging in the middle of the room. “Sleep. We’ll be here all night. Not going anywhere. Right, Olu?”

Olu looked soft in this light and perfectly sleepy. “Always.” He mumbled, already starting to doze, “We’re right here if you need us.”

“Thank you,” You whispered before climbing into the hammock.

It didn’t take you long to fall asleep after that. Jim’s comforting scent and both of their tired breathing and the steady rock of the ship lulled you to sleep. Maybe all you needed was the comfortable presence of the two people you trust most in the world.

Do not copy to another site. Ask for permission before bookbinding. I EXPLICITLY FORBID ANYONE FROM FEEDING MY FICS TO AI. All rude comments will be blocked and deleted.

Buy me a coffee?

[imtooscaredforthis]

Tethered

Part I- Chapter Four: Foster Care

Mentions of: Foster Care, Slight Child Neglect, Learning Disabilities, Bullying, Insomnia, Angst, etc.

A/N: Helloooo, I’ve been dying. A lot has been happening lately, too much to put in this author’s note, so I won’t. Instead, I’ll just post a little announcement about it. Just enjoy the chapter for now :))

Taglist: @gloomyladyy @froegis @prettycutebunny

The sound of voices downstairs managed to wake you, pulling you out of your drowsy haze. You sat up in your bed, stretching and looking over at the analog clock on the nightstand beside you. You overslept, and no one bothered to wake you.

To be fair, you didn’t have a roommate or anything, but either a caretaker or one of your friends would wake you. Today though, people seemed preoccupied. So, you got changed and ready for the day, before walking downstairs and joining the others.

And it was quite the sight. There were groups of children and teens all talking amongst themselves, with no adults to be seen. You spotted one of your friends, April, standing in one of the larger groups. She was a few years younger than you but was older than a lot of the other children.

“What’s happening?” You asked after weaving through the other kids and adolescents to speak with her.

“Apparently, there are too many kids here. So they’re trying to get us out. The younger ones are being looked at for adoption and sent to orphanages, and the older ones are going into foster care, and whatever’s left is staying.” She explained.

Something like this had happened before, in your old group home, where they had grown too overcrowded and had to get rid of the kids living there to make room for new ones, so it wasn't that surprising to you. It is a little different though since you never went into foster care before, only got put into other group homes. You couldn’t help but find the idea intimidating.

Maybe someone could help you sort this whole thing out and give you more details. So, you opted to go over to one of the adults and figure everything out. Mainly, you just wanted to know where you were going and what was going to happen next.

The first adult you could find was Ms.Jacobs. Now, she was one of the kinder and more gentle of the caretakers, but she was vacant, and not there when you needed her, like most of the adults around here. Usually, you just had to fend for yourself, like your peers did.

“Hey Ms.Jacobs, I heard that some kids are going to foster care and orphanages? And I just wanted to see if I’m going to foster care.” You greeted her.

“Yes, honey, I’m afraid you will be.” She answered, shutting down any hope you had of staying. “Oh, well, do you know where I’m going?”

“No, just that it’s anywhere but here.” She shrugged.

You let out a sigh, before giving her a small smile. “Can I ask you a favor? Can you have Alex come with me?”

“Alex already has a family looking into him for adoption which he’s staying with, I’m sorry.”

Shock, pain, and happiness all hit you at once, making you experience quite the wave of emotions. Now, you were happy for Alex. He finally found a family that will love him and care for him the way he deserves to be.

But he just left without even saying goodbye, and that hurt you deeply. After all you went through together, you thought you two were close. But now you guessed not.

“Why don’t you ask for another one of your friends and I’ll see what I can do.” She offered, and you looked over your shoulder, glancing around the room at the others before you came to a decision.

--

You sat alone at the table, messing with your fingers, looking down at the floor with a small frown on your face. There weren’t many left in the dining room, due to the fact that most were packing up and preparing to leave. So you spent this alone time reflecting.

You hadn’t even noticed someone joined you, until you heard an all too familiar voice. It was Frank’s. He was alone, and so were you, no one else there to see or hear the conversation.

“Hey, where’s that idiot that follows you around all the time?” He remarked, earning a glare from you. You really weren’t in the mood for this right now.

“He’s not an idiot, and he’s not here anymore. He got adopted.” You replied, not sure as to why you even bothered with him.

“Wow, really? That’s a suprise, especially considering how much of a freak he was. I mean, the kid couldn’t even read-”

“Can you not be a jerk for five seconds? God. And Alex was dyslexic. You and your friends were making fun of a kid just because he learned differently from you. I hope you’re happy with yourself.” Getting to your feet, you turned away and stormed out of the room, leaving Frank shocked.

--

You didn’t get much sleep that night, due to everything going on. You tossed and turned, unable to sit still, unable to relax and focus. You were so upset with all that was happening. With yourself, with Frank, with Alex, with having to leave, so many things.

It got to the point where you just gave up sleeping as a whole, getting up and packing your things, and even picking out your outfit for the day. Once you finished up with all of that, you laid back in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling, before your eyelids eventually grew heavy, and you shut them, inevitably letting yourself rest.

Unfortunately, your rest only lasted so long, and the next thing you know, the sound of a door opening woke you up. Someone sat on the edge of your bed, shaking you out of your sleepy haze. “(Y/n), (y/n), get up.”

“Hmm.” You mumbled, sitting up and rubbing your eyes, looking over at the caretaker who was in front of you. It was Ms.Annaliese, who seemed in a more urgent mood than usual. Which didn’t surprise you, considering all that was going on.

“You have to get ready. You’re heading off to your new foster home in about an hour, and Frank’s going with you, so, just get ready.”

[ticketstomydaydreams]

5:3666

(All We Have: Part Two)

Part One

Colson x Female Reader

Summary: You and Colson fall into a night time studio routine when he starts keeping you company through your insomnia and you decide to work though some past demons

Word count: 3,200 (ish, I lost count editing)

Feels: Fluff with a dash of past trauma

Warnings: Drug & alcohol consumption, domestic violence, cursing, Colson being so sweet it almost makes your teeth hurt

Companion playlist:

Machine Gun Kelly - 5:3666

Warren Zevon - I'll Sleep When I'm Dead

The Vamps - All Night

Halsey - You Should Be Sad

A/N: If you've been affected by anything in this story, please know you're not alone. My inbox is always open and I'm all ears 🖤

______

During the first couple of weeks of moving in, you’d been partying A LOT. The guys wanted to show you just how mad it got, breaking you into their chaotic household, blending the days together. Everyone was hyper and the house was buzzing with energy. You'd been so exhausted from all of it that you'd been all but passing out each night, but you couldn’t lie, it was great fun.

You’d tried to pass on a few nights but Colson would never hear of it, often forcing you out of your room to get involved as the house was filled with people, jam sessions taking place in between drinking games. It was a far cry from your usual homelife, your last housemate mainly kept to themselves so your place was normally pretty chilled. Colson had used your place as a quiet escape over the years, but it seemed you wouldn’t have the same set up extended to you here with this lot.

With the pandemic unfolding, the house had started getting quieter, less people in and out every night and everyone was settling into a lazier way of life. The gang were mooching around the house throughout the day and while the house was still lively at night, it wasn’t quite the party central you’d almost started getting used to. Your normal working routine went out the window as everyone had started working from home mainly and without your daily routine, followed by nights out partying, your insomnia was back with full force.

______

You were lying in your bed, trying to force sleep on yourself but after trying to nod off for a couple of hours, you accepted defeat and got back up. Throwing some sweats on and one of Colson’s huge hoodies (you’d been slowly sneaking them out of his closet, finding that the masses of material drowning your small frame were super comforting), you headed down to the kitchen, turned the stove on and filled the kettle up. You were scrolling through your phone when you heard footsteps on the tiled floor. Colson strolled into the kitchen looking disheveled in a white tank top and boxer shorts, hair ruffled and looking sleepy

“Dude, it’s 3am how come you’re up?”

“Couldn’t sleep, living that oh so fun insomnia life again” you sighed “Did I wake you?”

“Nah, I was already awake. Couldn’t sleep either and heard someone moving about so thought I’d come down” He replied, climbing onto one of the breakfast stools

“Yeah, I think it’s not having much of a routine. Hate lying in bed staring at the ceiling so just got up. You want a cup?” you offered, pointing to the chamomile tea you were brewing

“Sure, thanks” he says, taking the steaming mug from you

You sit down at the breakfast bar with him and start chatting, scrolling through instagram as you do. After about an hour, as you’re talking about an article you’re reading, you notice Colson doesn’t respond and you look to your right and see he’s fallen asleep, leaning on his hand, his mouth slightly ajar.

“Hey, sleeping beauty” you whisper, rubbing his back with your hand “Go to bed”

He slightly jolts at your touch, opening his eyes “Nah man, I’m keeping you company”

“Some company” you laugh softly “pretty sure you just slept through all my rambling there”

He leans against your shoulder, closing his eyes again “Hey, at least you’re not sitting here alone. That’s something right?”

“That’s true” you smile, leaning your head against his “You’re very appreciated, do you know that”

You gently push him upright and stand up “Come on, let’s go to bed. I’m pretty tired myself, so you’ve definitely helped”

He’s laid his head down on his arm on the counter, his breathing getting heavy immediately so you pull his other hand making him stand up. He stands up and puts his arm around your shoulder as you walk towards the stairs, your legs feeling heavy as you climb each step, carrying some of Colson’s weight as he sleepily walks with you

Once you’re standing outside your bedroom doors, he pulls you in for a hug

“Night kid, don’t be wandering around bored if you can’t sleep yeah? Just come get me. Nothing worse than sitting up alone at night…”

“Will do. Thanks Col” You squeeze him a bit tighter as he kisses the top of your head

“Night” you smile, as he let’s you go and turns and heads into his room, waving his hand up behind him

Undressing and crawling into bed, your eyes feel heavy as your head hits the pillow. Colson was right, insomnia was a much less lonely experience with a friend.

______

Of course, as is always the way after your sleepless nights, you sleep in super late the following day meaning the cycle continues and you find yourself wide awake as the witching hour approaches. Feeling restless in your bedroom, you get up, and decide to head downstairs and out into the studio because you figure you might as well put this time to good use. You settle into a chair with your acoustic guitar and started playing, stopping and starting as you figure out a melody, working your latest lyrics in with it

“I wanna start this out and say, I gotta get it off my chest. Got no anger, got no malice…”

“I thought I told you to come get me if you couldn’t sleep”

You almost drop your guitar as you hear Colson’s voice behind you, “Jesus, how are you such an enormous human but you still manage to creep up on me all the time?”

“Just a stealthy motherfucker I guess” He laughs, flopping into the chair next to you

“Whatcha working on? That sounded sweet, keep playing…”

Colson knows you sometimes get a bit self-conscious with people watching you sing, so he lights his joint, rests his head on his hand and closes his eyes. You smile as you see what he's doing, thankful he always understands what you're like.

You turn back to your notepad, reading over your lyric outline quickly before repositioning the guitar in your lap and resetting the metronome

___

‘I wanna start this out and say, I gotta get it off my chest

Got no anger, got no malice, Just a little bit of regret

No, nobody else will tell you, so there's some things I gotta say

Gonna jot it down and then get it out and then I'll be on my way

No, you're not half the man you think that you are

And you can't fill the hole inside of you with money, drugs, and cars

I'm so glad I never ever had a baby with you

'Cause you can't love nothing unless there's something in it for you

Oh, I feel so sorry, I feel so sad

I tried to help you, it just made you mad

And I had no warning about who you are

I'm just glad I made it out without breaking down

And then ran so fuckin' far, that you would never ever touch me again

Won't see your alligator tears

'Cause, no, I've had enough of them’

___

“Man, that was beautiful Y/N. I got some chills right there…You just wrote that?”

“Nah, it’s something I dug up from ‘back then’. Been going through some old lyrics and samples while we’ve got all this time on our hands. It’s kinda cathartic to go over some of that stuff now there’s a bit more distance you know”

______

A couple of years ago, you’d been stuck in a really toxic relationship with your ex, Stevie. Your time with him had been a tornado of arguments, drugs and the constant heartache of him cheating on you. Every time you’d get close to having the strength to leave, you’d always cave in and the mess would continue with you losing a bit of yourself each time you stayed. You’d become pretty used to his violent outbursts, he had always been controlling and short tempered, often pushing you and throwing stuff around your apartment. Despite his own frequent infidelity, he flew into a jealous rage with you constantly.

He’d always hated Colson, despite him being one of your best friends, and while he’d play nice to his face you’d always get it in the neck once you were alone about how you and Colson were ‘too close’ and he ‘didn’t trust him’. Before that final night you’d spent with him, things had been pretty good with the two of you for a few weeks, there hadn’t been much drama and so you hadn’t thought too much of inviting him out with you and the gang for a night out clubbing. Your good run had clearly come to an end, when you felt his hand grab your arm tightly and drag you off the dancefloor where you’d been dancing with Colson. You’d been bundled into an uber so quickly, you hadn’t even managed to get your handbag from inside. You saw Colson running out of the club, followed by Rook and Slim who was holding your bag, as the cab pulled away.

Once you were back at the apartment, he flew into a rage. You’d never seen him this bad before, his eyes were dark and when you tried to argue back, calling his jealousy ‘pathetic’ he snapped. He’d grabbed you by the throat and slammed you against the wall, “Don’t you ever disrespect me like that again” he’d spat in your face, before striking you so hard with his fist that the skin across your cheek split open. It was as if his actions had knocked him back to reality, he’d let go of you and you ran to your bedroom, locked the door behind you and started packing a bag. He hammered on the door, begging you to open it and you could hear that he was crying. You looked around for your phone before you remembered you’d left it at the club. Desperate to get away, you opened your laptop and brought up instagram, managing to send Colson a message asking him to send you an uber to his house straight away. You’d thrown your laptop and a few more bits in your bag, the battery dying before you had a chance to wait for a reply, before pulling the bedroom door open and barging past Stevie. He’d tried to grab you, but you’d finally had enough “Never fucking touch me again” you spat, pushing him off you. The hatred in your voice rooted him to the spot and he said nothing as you walked out, the door slamming behind you.

Once you were outside the apartment building, the reality of what had just happened and the situation you were in started to wash over you. You had no phone, no wallet, your laptop was dead. Just as you were starting to seriously panic, an uber pulled up and Colson had leapt out of the backseat. You’d been in total shock and had just let Colson guide you into the cab and then out into his house, up to his room. He didn’t say anything as he led you to his bathroom and lifted you up onto the counter. He grabbed a flannel and soaked it with warm water, rinsing it out before pressing it softly against the cut on your cheek, gently wiping away the blood that had mixed with your mascara laced tears. The tenderness of his actions was almost too much and you started to sob again.

“Hey, hey. Y/N, look at me” he said softly, lifting your chin so you looked at him, his blue eyes misty themselves “It’s okay, you’re safe here. Don’t move, I’ll be back in a sec”

He left the bathroom and returned with a pair of boxers and a t-shirt. Putting them on the counter next to you, he crouched down and undid the straps on your heels, slipping them off your feet and then helping you down from the counter. “I’ll leave you to change”

When you came out of the bathroom, Colson was lying in his bed “Come here” he said, holding his arm and beckoning into his side. You crawled under the covers next to him and snuggled into him, his long arms wrapping around you.

“Col…” you said quietly

“Yeah?” he whispered back, stroking your hair off your forehead

“Thank you…”

“You don’t need to thank me. I’ve always got you Y/N”

______

“I hated that fucking guy. That night...I wanted to kill him after what he’d done to you”

You see him tense up at the memory and you lean over and squeeze his knee “You’re such an amazing friend, do you know that. I don’t know what I would’ve done that night without you”

"You're a fucking warrior Y/N, you'd have handled your shit. I was just happy you trusted me enough to let me be there for you. You deserve so much better than that" he says, covering the hand you'd placed on his knee with his, staring you in the eyes and returning the smile that's crept across your face

"You know there's been a few punches I've wanted to dole out on behalf of you over the years, but you've never let me" you tell him

"Too right I'd never let you. I never want you in the drama, you're too good for getting caught up in that shit" he replies, pointing at you with mock sternness

"Hey" he says, seeing your expression wash over with a tint of sadness "At least the sleepless nights aren't what they were then…

… If we're gonna work through some old demons this lockdown, I'm sure I've got some songs and lyrics that have never seen the light of day" He reaches over the desk and pulls his laptop towards him "You've inspired me… "

"Oh no, are we gonna fuck our heads up with this?" you joke nervously, worrying that Colson's going to delve into something that's going to upset him

"Nah, I got you covered and you got me, right?"

"True dat" you say, as he holds his fist out so you can fistbump, his eyes now focused on his laptop screen

______

You felt kinda bad, having kept Colson up all night with you the last two nights, especially as you'd got him reminiscing about some tough memories, so tonight you tried to sneak past his room when your restlessness got the better of you.

"Nice try kid!" Colson says as he throws his bedroom door open, causing you to yelp in fright. standing there topless with his sweatpants hung low in his hips, he lights the joint hanging from his mouth "I told you we were in this together now"

"I felt bad, making you stay up with me"

"You didn't make me do shit…Wait a sec, let me find a hoodie. If I have any left in here…" he says, giving a pointed look towards the huge blue hoodie you were wrapped in before walking back into his room and rummaging through his drawers

"Oh shush, you have like a hundred…"

"Right come on" he says, pulling a pink hoodie over his head and flipping the hood up over his messy hair "Let's see what we get into tonight…"

______

And so the nights went on like this, the two of you falling into an easygoing studio routine. If there wasn't anything else going on in the house, you'd eat dinner together then head to the studio and work through the night into the small hours, skipping out the pretense of trying to sleep. You were both pretty productive at this time it seemed, both being proclaimed night owls, and keeping busy during these uncertain times was keeping your minds off the unfolding pandemic.

Considering he’d referred to his home studio in the past as the ‘rage cage’ (and it certainly could still be party central when the entire crew got involved), it was actually a place you drifted towards to relax these days. You’d always worked well together in a studio, but over the weeks spending so much time just the two of you, you became more in tune with each other, noticing when one of you had hit a wall and it was time for bed. Sometimes you'd work in comfortable silence, side by side, engrossed in your own seperate tasks. Sometimes barely any work would get done as you put the world to rights talking about anything and everything in a late night impromptu therapy session.

This evening, you'd been sitting cross legged in your chair for hours now, focusing so hard on editing a song which was driving you mad, you hadn't realised your feet had gone numb. As you try to move, your knees crack and pins and needles shoot through your legs. Colson looks up from the screen he'd been engrossed in after hearing you groan and sees you rubbing your feet trying to bring back the feeling to them

‘C’mere’ he said, before turning his chair towards you and leaning down to grab your legs, bringing your feet up onto his lap. He pulls your socks off and begins massaging your feet. You lean your head back, eyes closed and let out a long ‘hmmm’. You don’t see Colson glancing over at you and shifting in his seat as he lets out slow breath before turning back to his screen

“Now this is the kind of work session I could get used to”, you sighed "You being my studio bitch on hand for foot rubs. Although, I imagine this enjoyment goes both ways Mr Foot Lover” you tease, throwing him an exaggerated wink

Colson throws his head back with a hearty chuckle, and light heartedly slaps your calf

"Keep it in your pants Y/N"

You laugh and wiggle your toes, Colson letting out a dramatic, throaty groan in response. "Those are some sexy little toes though" he states, sticking his tongue out.

Still laughing, you put your hand to your chest, and gasp as you feign prudishness and try to pull your feet away. He grabs both your feet in one of his hands, keeping them in place then leans over the desk and pulls your laptop towards you

"Get on with some work you, this is supposed to be keeping you motivated, not distracted"

He scolds affectionately, with a smile on his face

“Okay, okay, spoilsport” you grumble as you pull your computer onto your lap

Half an hour passes, your legs still on Colson’s lap with him still massaging your feet absentmindedly with one hand while he works, and your eyes begin to feel heavy. You don’t realise you’ve fallen asleep, until you’re awoken by a “woah” from Colson as he catches your laptop which is about to fall. Taking it from your lap, he states “Right, time for bed you”

You check your phone and see it’s already 5:36am.

You stand up and stretch then walk over behind Colson, putting your arms around his shoulders, and resting your chin on his head. Looking at his screen, you yawn “You got much left to do?”

He leans back into you, bringing his hand up to rest on your arm, “Making some good progress so just gonna finish a couple of bits”

“Okay dude” you gently kiss the top of his head and squeeze the back of his neck a couple of times as you turn to leave “Try and get some rest, we’ve got a long day of sweet fuck all to do tomorrow” you say through another big yawn

“Heh yeah, Night Kid” he says softly, letting out a yawn himself. Colson turns and watches you head out of the studio and lets out a big sigh. Feeling the back of his neck still tingle from where you’d squeezed it, he’s suddenly aware of how empty the room feels without you in it....

______

Taglist: @triplexdoublex @thisshitisfuckingdifficult @brightblaqkkheaven

Lace Up! ❌❌

[purpleyellow]

Sleepy talks

NCT 24th member / Dream 8th member

Bee’s Masterlist

“What happened overnight during 7in in the Dream” 

a/n: So like, technically there’s 8 of them in this au, but the pun doesn’t make sense with 8 so it’s still called 7in in the dream because i have no creativity. I finished it!! Feel free to share your thoughts with me. Requests are open!💛

After changing into pajamas, Bee flops on the huge bed from the downstairs room where she was assigned to sleep. Chenle also lays down, adjusting his covers, when Jeno who was still against sleeping in the “dog bed” jumps in the space between them and somehow manages to hug both of their figures.

“Go to your house” Chenle teases him and in the background, Jaemin can be heard joking with Jisung.

“Let's do one of those cheesy reality moments” Jeno mumbles ignoring the boy and snuggles closer to them. He clears his throat before continuing, “Everyone, what was your favorite moment today?”

“I liked dinner,” Bee says before yawning and Jeno reaches out to tickle her sides while Haechan shouts something from the upper floor.

“That's because you didn't have to do anything” The boy jokes while she laughs and tries to get away from him. What he was saying was true, Bee had been lucky enough to win almost every rock paper scissors game which allowed her to sit back, read and enjoy the weather while the boys sorted out the rest of it.

Her luck had worn off at the end of the day, though. She had to help clean after dinner and, in her opinion the worst task, she was put into breakfast duty which meant waking up earlier than everyone else.

“You two are too loud, go to sleep” Chenle complains and kicks their legs making Jeno begrudgingly get up and enter the dog house. The noise from outside the room indicating that the others were nowhere close to being asleep.

After some complaining and shouts claiming for silence, one by one the boys started to tone down leading the house to silence. Bee was deep in sleep by then, and she would have stayed like that through the whole night if it weren't for Chenle moving around and accidentally kicking her back.

Everything is ten times darker considering all the lights are turned off, and the house is in complete and utter silence. Even the small barbering of staff members is gone considering that most of them had left, leaving only the equipment behind for when they come back the next day.

Bee would have no problem going back to sleep in those conditions if it wasn't for the sudden wish to use the restroom. Truly the worst, her body did not want to get out of bed but at the same time, it demanded her to do so.

The girl scrambles onto her feet, trying not to wake up Chenle or possibly Jeno, and tip toed her way around the house. She hoped to pee as fast as possible and go back to bed immediately after, though it seemed like the universe, once again had other plans.

Not only did she got more conscious than she would've wanted, Bee also got scared by a shadow passing by when she was leaving the bathroom to return to her room. Said shadow was also startled by her presence and turned around placing a hand over his chest.

“Damn, I thought I was the only one awake at this hour” Mark speaks in a hushed tone. Bee points back at where she came out of as an explanation.

“Are you struggling to sleep again?” She asks, remembering that insomnia was one of the things he talked about when they started the “friends plan”.

“I was doing good lately. Guess the change of scenery must have messed it up a little” He shrugs and looks outside for a second. “I slept for a few hours until now. Was thinking about sitting out there and waiting for when the staff starts arriving for the waking up shots”.

“There's still a couple of hours before that happens”

“I doubt I can sleep until then, it's okay though. I'll work on some lyrics or something”.

Bee could definitely use more sleep but the thought of him working until sunrise felt insane to her, especially with the tiring day they had. "I'll go with you then" She shrugs and takes the blanket from the couch.

"You can go rest. I'm fine, trust me" Mark laughs but opens the sliding doors for her to pass.

"We can chat for a second, and then maybe you'll get bored and fall asleep," She says carefully. No matter how many times they had those random chats, she still felt a little weird to start them.

“You're not boring to talk to” He smiles, sitting on the swing chair near the pool. Thinking about something to do, he remembers what they started playing a few weeks before  “Want to play questions again?”

“I guess I can go first” Bee places the blanket on top of her and thinks for a couple of seconds before continuing “How did you get good at that game we played earlier?”

“Which one?” Giggling, Mark thinks back at the long day they've had and how it was impossible to guess which one she was referring to.

“That one we used it to decide who was going to clean up. You know, with the cups” She yawns making the sentence trail off.

“Oh, beer pong?” Mark waits for her to nod, “I don't know. Just played it a lot with 127 I guess. My aiming isn't that bad, so that's also probably why”.

“Cool, cool” Her head pends backward and hits the back of the chair making Bee rest her eyes for a few seconds before opening them again and seeing Mark’s side glancing at her.

“You should go to bed. I'll be fine here”.

“It's your turn now” She ignores him and nods for his question. The boy sighs thinking for a second before speaking.

“What's your favorite Harry Potter movie?”

“Never watched them”

“You've never watched Harry Potter?” Mark exclaims now fully turning to her with a deeply concerned expression.

“I'm sorry,” She says mid-yawn

“We're doing a marathon once things calm down. I can't believe you haven't even watched one of them”.

Humming, Bee closes her eyes again, momentarily slipping off to unconsciousness before shaking her head and waking up.

“Yun-hee, just go lay down” Mark laughs pointing back to the house. “We're getting up to make breakfast in a couple of hours, rest while you can”.

“But you're going to stay out here by yourself?” She frowns, half-convinced to go back into the warmth of her covers. “At least go back to bed even if it's to stay on your phone or something”.

Mark thinks for a second before accepting her suggestion “Okay, let's go”

He jumps to his feet and helps her get up.

Bee drags herself and the covers back to the door of her room where she waves him good night and flops inside. In the dark, she accidentally falls on top of Chenle, who doesn't even move while she maneuvers herself onto an empty space to safely drift back into dreamland.

It feels like the blink of an eye between that moment and a few hours after when Jaemin jumps on top of her and starts making weird "boop" noises, calling her to go help him make breakfast.

[alby-rei]

[Arthur Week, Day 3] Midnight Snacks

a/n: in which MC (ft. accomplice Dazai) wants to make the resident flirt, Arthur Conan Doyle, jealous. Why? Who knows! But what I do know is that it ends up working in his favor rather than MC’s... wait, what?

a/n 2: changed the title cuz it was bothering me xD nothing else changed.

My entry for @scummy-writes​‘s Arthur Week! 

Day 3: Coffee and Fudge || Writer’s Block

[Pairing]: Arthur x You/gn!MC, (pre-relationship)

[Characters]: You, Arthur, Dazai, Sebastian

[Word count]: ~2300 words

[Rating]: T

[POV]: 2nd Person 

“...and all of a sudden, I hear Mozart yell ‘stop releasing chickens in my music room!’ but Dazai didn’t even flinch!” You brought a foam-covered hand up to your mouth to cover your laughter.

You and Sebastian were cleaning the dishes together after lunch time. You’ve made it a habit to catch up on your day and share observations with Sebas, as pretty much no one steps into the kitchen around this time.

Well, that is except—

“_____~!”

Except Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, naturally. He must’ve finished his writing session and been wandering around the mansion, as is his trademark since your arrival.

You closed your eyes, hoping the man would walk past the kitchen without checking. You weren’t exactly in the mood for flirty games with the mystery writer, especially not after dealing with a haughty music teacher in Mozart. Sadly, luck was not on your side, today.

“I’ll tell you the rest later,” you wipe your hands with a towel. Picking up the tray of plates and cups to put them in their rightful places, you didn’t pay the writer any mind.

“After this I gotta find Dazai,” you said as you opened a cupboard. Your turned around to find Arthur leaning on the door frame, and your tone shifted dramatically, “Oh! Arthur, funny to see you here.”

Sebastian knew that tone very well. It was your sickeningly sweet voice that you dedicated to either (a) dodging conversation, or (b) planning something against that person.

“I’d say the same to you, ___, but you’re always in the kitchen. I couldn’t help dropping in to check on my favorite bird,” Arthur leaned against the door frame, flashing you a grin and a wink.

“Oh please, don’t talk about birds after what happened this morning,”  You caught sight of your target at the end of the hallway, “aaaand I have to go, see ya!” 

You duck under Arthur’s arm while his guard was down. He twirled around to follow you, but you evaded him, calling out to Dazai. Arthur stood in his tracks, as he watched the japanese author stop for you, and you beamed up at him.

“Dazai-san, I’ve been wanting to ask you for something, if you’re… free,” you noticed mid-sentence that the chicken that was still nestled in his arms.

“Hm?” His piercing yellow eyes brightened, “I’ll always have time for you, Toshiko-san.”

“Bawk!” The chicken… agreed, supposedly.

You laughed sheepishly, “That’s very sweet of you, I was actually interested in learning about your writing style and get some advice. I’ve been going through some terrible writer’s block.”

“I was working on a short story earlier, it’s in my room. Want to come with me?” He began to lead her towards his room.      

“I’m honored! I’d love to, Dazai-san.”

Oh yes, you were definitely planning something, Sebastian noted.

As the two of them walked away, Arthur stood glued watching the scene. Sebastian had been poking his arm the whole time, but he didn’t budge. Even shaking his entire arm didn’t spur any sudden movement from him.

“Sir Arthur. Earth to Sir Arthur,” Sebas continued tapping his shoulder and pinching his arm.

“Huh? Oh…” His gaze held an odd expression, one that Sebastian hadn’t seen from him before—a hint of sadness, maybe even frustration. But it was quickly replaced by his signature grin as he finally took notice of me, “Sorry, Sebas, I must’ve been blocking your path, got to go!”

And just like that, he scurried off.

After a moment’s pause, and after making sure the hallway was clear of esteemed residents, Sebastian did much the same, but in the opposite direction. He has notes to take, pronto. 

~*~

You and Dazai sat in the lounge room, having passed by his room, and Dazai collected his writing material.

“You have really pretty hands, Toshiko-san. I’ve heard you playing in Mo-kun’s piano room, you’re a wonderful pianist,” Dazai held your hand delicately in his, as he ran his thumb over your knuckles.

“Thank you, it’s something I take a lot of pride in,” your heart swelled from the warmth of his compliment, “but I’ve been much more interested with writing as of late. Actually, I’ve always wanted to write a novel.”

“Oh? I admire your ambition. How can I help?”      

“Well well well, what do we have here?” A third voice chimed in.

Right on time, as you expected.

“Have I interrupted your little rendezvous?” Arthur walked slowly and purposefully, as if he had caught them red-handed doing something they shouldn’t.

Internally, he was trying his best not to jump to conclusions. That would be uncharacteristic of him, after all. You weren’t tied to him in anyway, so there was no reason to feel so jealous that you went to Dazai for writing help instead of him. He didn’t even know about it!

So why was his heart pounding so loudly in his head while his eyes were fixated on their linked hands?

Dazai withdrew his hand, occupying it with his writing pen instead. He shot Arthur a smile with closed eyes.

“Of course not, we were just talking, Arty.”

“…Don’t call me that,” Arthur narrowed his eyes, “and second, I’d like to steal ____ now.”

“I’m sorry, Arthur, but I want to talk with Dazai a bit to improve my writing.”

Being shot down so directly caught Arthur off-guard; his insecurities getting a hold of him. For the first time, he found himself at a loss for ways to turn the conversation in his favor. At the moment, if he persisted, and you kept turning him down, he wouldn’t be able to let it down for the rest of the day.

Instead, Arthur straightened himself, fixing his tie, “Well then, I’m heading to the pub soon enough to find me a pretty skirt for the evening. Have fun, you two, I know I will.”

He huffed childishly, going out with a wave. Dazai turned to you with a polite smile.

“Do you think it worked?”

“Oh, he is definitely salty, thanks for agreeing to this, Dazai-san.”

“Any time, Yoshie-san, what are housemates for?” He smiled fondly at you.

“You’re a great actor, didn’t even flinch!”

“Ah, but who said I was acting?”

He got up with his writing tools and stepped out of the lounge before you registered what he said.

“Wait… what?!”

~*~

Later that evening…

…Well, more like around midnight, you just happened to catch the insomnia bug and were heading to the kitchen, as all people naturally do when they’re insomniac. You switched on the lights, thankful for the dimness of the lanterns in the kitchen. Scanning your options, your eyes settled on the coffee pot that sat quietly in the corner. Thoughts of a certain mystery writer gnawed at you, but you darted them away and walked past the coffee pot to get a glass of water instead. You leaned forward, filling her glass with bleary eyes that refused to slumber but also refused to open properly.  

Suddenly, you felt a touch to your backside. Eyes cracking wide open, you spun around and swung your makeshift weapon of glass at your offender. The offending mop of ash blue hair felt the full force of the blow, and the glass shattered across the floor.

Well crap.

“Ow… If I’m not mistaken, I’d say you were trying to kill me there, ____.”

For the love—.

“Arthur what the hell were you trying to pull?! Bloody hell! You made my heart drop.”

In a flash, his body was pressed against yours, caging you between his arms and the kitchen counter. The crunch of the glass under his shoes was the only sound in the room. You saw a small stream of blood start to fall by his ear.

“I was going to prepare myself a midnight snack with my coffee, but it seems I already found one ready for a taste test,” he licked the back of his fangs.

“At this hour??” It was well past midnight by now, and caffeine was the last thing you’d recommend anyone at this time. 

You felt his breath on your ear before he inhaled your scent. It was comforting to him as much as it was intoxicating to his senses.

He sighed, “____… I can’t get you out of my mind, no matter what I do.”

His arms circled around your waist, pulling you away from the countertop and flush against him, instead. All sorts of alarms were going off in your mind despite the drowsiness, with your instincts telling you to push him off.

“But then, you started avoiding me. And then… Sebastian and Mozart and even Dazai took you away from me,” he sniffled.

You pushed him off gently but still within his arms, as you stared at his face. There was a pink dust across his cheeks and a redness in the corners of his eyes.

“Arthur, are you… drunk?”

His frown flipped into a grin as he nuzzled his nose into your disheveled hair.

“Oh, don’t be silly, dear. I may have been out drinking, but I can bloody well hold my liquor. Theo can vouch for me on that.”

(a/n: no, he can’t lmao)

The sight of him in a somewhat vulnerable state, as well as the smell of his cologne, made it hard for you to properly fight him. Plus, you felt bad for crushing a glass cup on his head. Speaking of which…

“Is your head okay?”

“Hm…” He brought a gloved hand to his forehead, feeling a dull pounding in its wake, “I must say, you got me good, even the most daring fools never landed a hit on me yet.”

Just how thick is his skull to endure that?! You were both dazzled and frightened by their realization. 

With one of his arms off of you, you took this chance to escape, but you slid on a shard of glass and would have fallen face first onto the floor had Arthur not pulled you against him and taken the impact of the floor to his own shoulder. He laid on his back, clutching you protectively against his chest. He groaned with pain, but he pushed it aside to check on you first.

“Clumsy tonight, are we, or are you seriously trying to kill me?” He chuckled wryly.

Before you could even blink, you felt your vision do a 180-flip, and you were suddenly beneath him, away from the glass shards that littered the floor. The scent of his cologne flooded your senses again, as he smirked down on you with a drunken lopsided grin.

“I was absolutely livid when I saw Dazai hold your hand. Was that part of your plan, darling? Well, I’ve taken the bait.”

You flinched, your body wide awake to every touch and caress of this man. You bit your lip to avoid playing into his hands. You were still in control of the situation, you thought. His lips descended to your jaw, barely brushing your skin, like he’s testing your limits. Instinctively, you sighed, unaware of the breath you’d been holding.

Ok, maybe you weren’t entirely in control, either.

“Arthur…” You commanded, trying to regain some semblance of control back.

This was not part of your plan, however, and you were quickly losing grip of all reason and logic. You needed to get him off and away from you before you acquiesced to his ministrations.

“But don’t worry, ____. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to.”

He drew back from you, staring down at you with an uncharacteristic tender look. He continued.

“The effect you have on me is not one I’ve felt with any woman I’ve ever encountered before. It’s confusing—maddening, even— and I can’t escape it… because I don’t want to,” he sighed in surrender, “I want you, ___.” 

It was a look of pure love and affection that shone in his eyes. His half-opened shirt invited your gaze to roam his body, and his thick-rimmed glasses framed his features in such an alluring glow that outshone the dimness of the kitchen. His hair looked softer than usual, too. Your hand twitched at the thought of running your fingers through those ash blue locks. Your mind was thrown into a whirlwind with the influx of new information, one that dented your rationality. Your desire to get closer to him wrestled against your impartial stoicism, threatening to crack the armor around the stone gates to your heart.

“Hey Arthur,” you started, twirling a lock of his hair with your hand. It was ever-so-slightly damp; he must’ve bathed in le thermae earlier.

“Yes, ____?”

Damn that seductive voice of his, you shooed away that thought as soon as it entered. You chose to focus on something much more pressing at the moment. 

“We need to get you bandaged up. You’re bleeding terribly from your head.”

~*~

It took a lot of convincing, but Arthur finally acquiesced to your persistent request.

“There, all done,” you stepped back from Arthur, who was sitting hunched over on his bed.

You were both settled in his room with his medical bag open on the desk and his equipment strewn all around. You didn’t exactly know what to do to treat Arthur’s wound, but you insisted on doing it for him… with copious amounts of instructions from him.

“I brought you some fresh coffee and fudge, as an apology.”

“At this hour?” He mimicked your tone from earlier. You rolled your eyes at his childishness.

“And here I am trying to make it up to you, and this is how you show gratitude?”

You huffed indignantly, ready to head out and leave the unappreciative writer to his own devices.

“Hold on, now,” he gripped your wrist before you could fully turn away, “you’re the one who smashed glass on my head, so you owe me a favor.”

“…a favor on top of tending to your wounds and bringing you coffee?”

“Oh, indulge me, won’t you? You did those of your own volition.”

You sigh, “Depends on the request, then.”

“Feed me,” he perked up with no hesitation or embarrassment in his tone.

You wanted to turn him down, to tease him about his child-like excitement, but you couldn’t resist his puppy dog eyes. Those eyes held a very powerful hold over you though you blame it on your own tiredness outweighing your better judgment.

“Alright…” You moved aside his things to sit next to him, leaning towards the table to drag the tray closer to yourself.

“Open wide, you incorrigible baby.”

[bitch-im-your-biggest-nightmare]

Stars [Corpse x reader part 2]

𝙄𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙖𝙡𝙤𝙣𝙚, 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙄 𝙖𝙢 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙨.

Warnings: Angst, self doubt, fluff, romance                   FYI: Y/N=Your name C/N=Channel name H/C=Hair color E/C=Eye co Summary: Y/N and Corpse were in love.. until Corpse had to                  leave. But what if they finally reunite..?

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When you woke up that morning, you just laid in bed and thought of the stream coming up. You had no idea who was gonna be there besides Jack, so you were pretty nervous. Checking Twitter, you saw how excited your fans were. You heard some people the group you were gonna be playing with is a really cool group. She couldn’t wait how they acted and how they were- she hoped that she would make good friendships along the way. 

When you checked the time, you saw that it was 10am, which meant you still had time to yourself. You took a quick shower, got dressed, and went out to eat breakfast. You went to a Tim Hortons that wasn’t too far away from your house and ordered a donut and some coffee and you were on your way. When you got home, the donut was already gone since you were an extremely fast eater- which,, is what Corpse would tease you about. 

Man, you really hoped Corpse was ok. You hoped he achieved his dreams.. You haven’t heard anything about him nor mentioned his name to your fans so no one knew of the past relationship you had. Which wasn’t surprising, you weren’t the one to be that open about your personal life. It’s call a personal life for a reason, y’know.

You guessed that Corpse moved on with life. Maybe got a job, another girlfriend, and maybe the drawing of your life with him was torn out of the sketchbook, which honestly saddened you. You wanted Corpse to be happy, but deep inside you knew you were meant for him. 

You thought of him a lot, you wanted to know if he thought of you every once in a while. Did he love you even after all these years? Or was your name just wiped from his mind? You still heard his deep ravishing voice in your dreams, and still saw visions of his silky black hair. You were practically in love with your ex, which was a horrible thought. You couldn’t him off your mind.

And quite frankly, Corpse couldn’t get you off his mind. 

He beat himself up everyday ever since he didn’t message you. He had no idea why- but he did think he was just scared of the commitment of a long distance relationship. He tried finding you, but all he could find was old instagrams and that was it, there was nothing. 

Corpse really missed you, he never accepted another love. Even when people were going insane about his voice, he never cared to hit one up who looked attractive enough. But he wasn’t about the looks, he was about the personality. Which is how he fell in love with you. 

You’re smile and your outgoing personality dragged him in. Ever since he saw you walking down the hallways of that damn middle school in the winter of 8th grade, he was in love. But he was young and was quiet, he didn’t know what love meant back then. But as he got older, he finally understood. And now he understands the pain and guilt that comes with it. 

“Where are you Y/N..” 

That was a common question. He really hoped you were out there somewhere, living lively and happily. Maybe with a boyfriend, or a husband, even a kid. Maybe you have a successful job and the name “Corpse” only goes back to dead bodies. Even though he wants you to be happy, he still really hopes you haven’t moved on since then...

He was up all night, as usual. Either listening to horror stories, reading them, scrolling through the internet, making himself food, listening to music, or editing videos. He was tired, but he able to push it away just like that. Insomnia got his ass, but copes. 

He was setting up to record for his live stream when he noticed it was time for him to hop on. He never likes to be the first one there, but he also doesn’t wanna be the last. This time he was last- he was late. 

He quickly hopped on the Discord call and joined the Among Us lobby, beginning his stream straight away.

Before he can even greet the people there, he heard a voice that soaked his skin in a familiar wave of warmth. 

“Wait- Y/N?”

There was a gasp, “Corpse?!” 

To be continued, I apologize. 

[minachuuu]

The Voice That Keeps Following Me

❣The Voice That Keeps Following Me❣

The sequel for Voices I Can’t Run Away From is finally here. I chose to make it a sequel and not a 2-part story, because I wrote the first one thinking of it as a stand-alone story, but I was requested a second part and I really like how it turned out! Hope you enjoy it too!

❤ AU: DreamCatcher (Fem!) 8th Member

❤ Genre: Angst

❤ Word Count: 6.8k

❤ Song Suggestions: Scream by DreamCatcher and Fight Inside by Red

⚠ TW : Harassment, blood and guns.

Day 134

Look at my family. 

My mind sometimes likes to play and pretends to be a camera, it goes through life slowing moments down around me, allowing me to bask in the emotions that they gift me. And then it stores them, there in my fondest memories. I have a lot of them to choose from when my thoughts get dark, the light they emanate is enough to shut the whispers in my mind. 

The warm embrace of my members is one that comes very often, but it was that night around four months ago that I first felt like someone really loved me. But do they really? And I try not to look back from that. Or do I?

The sun was high in the sky, a warm and welcoming spotlight that followed us through your late winter promotions, the chilly winds still rattled the thin hair in your forearms, but there was no more snow falling from the sky. The windows in the van didn’t fog like before and you could watch little flowers sprout all over the city as spring felt closer and closer.

Your favorite song was blasting through your right earpod, while the other ear enjoyed the background noise of Yoohyeon and Bora bickering in the seats in front of you. Yubin sat by your side, ignoring all reality happening before her while playing a game on her phone.

A light chuckle escaped your lips when you caught a glimpse of SuA tossing what could have been a sock to Yoohyeon, hitting her straight in the face. The latter just turned around, dumbfounded as Bora’s sudden laugh even managed to make Yubin raise her view to her. She then turned her head towards you, her eyes asking for an explanation. You didn’t play attention to the reason why, so you could only offer her back an affiliative smile and a shrug. It seemed to be enough for her, since these two always going at each other every single day was a good source of entertainment.

Your eyes travelled outside, discovering that you were already at your destiny. The fansign venue was already surrounded by a long line of eager fans waiting for you, and as soon one spotted the van, they all turned around to wave at you. Except for one guy that stood out for you from the others for not matching the excitement around him. All dressed in black, the hoodie covering up half of his face.

They’re still here, and they won’t go until you go down with them.

A sudden chill went down your spine, just as every time that you had to encounter an audience face to face, but shaking your head, you were quick to shut it down as the rest of the fans excited smiles and screams muffled behind the window drew a smile on your face, one that you didn’t get that often.

The car stopped it’s movement just behind the venue and the door opened, letting all unfiltered light into your eyes. Yoohyeon and Bora got out of the van and then the manager helped you and Yubin out too. As soon as your feet touched the ground, you felt an arm intertwined with yours, pulling you closer.

“Y/n!” Bora’s voice boomed as you identified her by your side. “If… Let’s say, you hypothetically had a favorite Unnie, who would that be?”

You stared at her trying to analyse what the best answer to that question could be, you loved all your members equally, but something in her voice told you that the question had a tricky part that she wasn’t telling you about. 

Your suspicions were confirmed when you raised your view, Yoohyeon shaking her head at the scene before her.

“It’s probably Handong-unnie.” You answered nonchalantly. 

“Y/n-yah!” Bora let go and slapped your arm playfully, pouting her lips. “You were supposed to say me! Alright then. Yubin!-”

“Mine’s Minji.” She answered without letting the older even breathe. 

“Ah!” Bora whined, cutely hoping in her place. “Why am I no one’s favorite?! That’s not fair!”

“Maybe because you jump in my bed when I’m trying to sleep?” Yoohyeon added.

“Or because you belt in my ear to scare me when I try to read?” Yubin scoffed.

“Or…” You thought of something to add, but Bora hadn’t been anything but loving to you most of the time. Yes, her way of showing love was sometimes super clingy and loud but, you loved her that way, so you couldn’t really come with a better excuse. “Or maybe because you’re just not Dongie-Unnie.”

She deadpanned towards you, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“At this rate I’ll never win the bet against Minji,” She sighed. She turned around, just when the other van was pulling up behind yours. Her eyes lit up, as she ran towards it. “Gahyeon-ah!!”

The three of you laughed out loud, shaking your heads at the occurrences of your older member. You walked towards the entrance of the building together, your laugh still dying down when you heard Gahyeon mumble in the distance followed by Bora’s loud whine.

“I hope Minji gives us our part of whatever she bet against her,” Yoohyeon chuckled, holding the door open as you entered the building.

We walked towards a large room with some couches and chairs, a table full of snacks and a wall entirely made of mirrors. Even decorated with some of your comeback posters on the other walls.

You walked towards the table, scanning carefully the snack offerings over it. Amongst some chocolate bars, caramels and beverages, you grabbed a bag of chips to snack as you waited to go outside.

“Good news everyone!” Minji entered the room with her arms wide open, a huge grin on her face. “Today’s dinner is on Bora!”

The seven of you cheered loudly as the latter just pouted, her arms still crossed and her eyebrows furrowed and plunged into a couch near you. You decided to come approach her, taking the seat besides her. You snacked on your bag of chips silently when you decided to turn to Bora and offer her some, she accepted them as she grumbled under her breath. The sight made you chuckle, seeing the most enthusiast member of your group all moody over a bet, but as the seconds passed, you started missing her energetic spirit.

“Unnie…” You leaned over to her, sweetening your voice. “If you buy tteokbokki, I promise you’ll become my favorite.”

She snapped her head towards you,her eyes squinting with suspicion and temptation to your offer. You smiled at her in the most innocent way that you could, bringing out your puppy eyes which you knew she couldn’t resist.

“Ah fine,” She cupped your cheeks with her hands, pinching your cheeks. The sudden gesture that prompted you to drop your mask, trying hard to get off her grip. “Just because you are my favorite maknae, even if you broke my heart in a million pieces. Just don’t tell the others.”

“I won’t, I promise.” Your voice muffled by the pressure that her hands were applying to your cheeks. You raised your hand, painting at her hands over your face “Can you… let go?”

“Never.” She released your face, but you didn’t get to savor freedom for long since she wrapped her body around yours, cuddling into you.

A sudden blush invaded your cheeks, softening your pride. You let yourself cuddle into Bora, while a smile kept growing in your face. 

And then, time slowed down as you let your eyes wander through the space. Minji and Siyeon are laughing in the corner, the white walls reflecting in the sparks in their eyes. Gahyeon and Yoohyeon bickering around Handong, but the oldest of them just smirked at the probably childish discussion they had going on. Yubin was silently existing by my side on the couch, reading what seemed like her hundredth book in the month. You still didn’t know how she managed to do it with all the activities of the comeback. And then there was Bora, cuddled in her arms, making you feel like you were protected from everything in the world.

You sighed, savoring the emotions in the moment, your heart warming up at the sight of the best family that the world was able to give you ever.

But, are you really sure that you deserve all of this? After all you made them go through?

Thankfully, the voice in your mind was broken when a manager opened the door, calling everyone out to the stage to start the fansign.

You stood up from the couch, as you felt your body shaking nervously. This being your first fansign since the last comeback, and the “incident”. That’s how you and the members preferred calling it without inviting back unwanted feelings and memories.

They were quick to notice your nerves and approach to surround you in that familiar and safety blanket that they were all so used to being part of. Shanking your head, you released a shaky breath out of your lips and nodded, the girls taking the sign to move forward.

You could hear the deafening cheers of Insomnias from the other side of the hallway, as your heart ramped up it’s speed. Unsure if that was nerves or excitement, you wrapped the first hand that you could, that being Siyeon’s. 

“Hey,” She turned around, offering you a conforming smile. “We’ve got your back, you’ll be okay Y/n.”

You nodded, leaning into her shoulder as you kept walking towards the main stage where your fans were already waiting for you. The door to the stage opened, making the shouts from Insomnia even louder. Your table with eight chairs and a bottle of water was already waiting for you too. The staff handed you each one microphone as you crossed the door.

The bright lights of the auditorium blinded you as you made your way into the stage, cheers cramming your ears. It took a few seconds for your senses to get used to all the sudden stimulation, but once they did, you were greeted with your fans waving and smiling at you.

You smiled back at them, offering them finger hearts and flying kisses. The clics from the fansites cameras refuse to cease, as you greeted your few acquaintances that sat between the audience. But as your eyes scanned around, you landed on that same man that you spot outside. With his hoodie still over his face, he wasn’t jumping up and down or smiling like the rest of the people around him. All you could see was a faint smirk in the shadow, as he slowly clapped to match the rest of the people. 

“Let’s introduce ourselves!” You heard Minji clap to get the attention of the group, and you quickly stood in a straight line facing your audience. “One, two-”

“Dream of me! Hello, we are Dreamcatcher!” All of you chorused together, pumping up your fans even more. Each one of them introduced themselves, one after the other. Gahyeon was last, and everyone remained silent.

“Hello! It’s Y/n!” You cheered through your microphone. The audience exploded louder than before. Even hearing some ‘We’ve missed you!’ and other ‘Insomnia loves you!’. You turned to your members, to find them all grinning widely at you, which made you blush intensely. 

But then again, your eyes had to land on that one unenergetic guy in the audience, still with the same grin and slowly clapping in his seat. 

Maybe they didn’t really miss you, maybe the group was better when you were gone.

You shook your head, trying to get the thought out of your head. But it kept nagging in there. Trying to talk, your lips parted as words got up your throat but never past your lips. You didn’t realize how shaky your hand was until you felt Yoohyeon’s trying to get a grip of it.

Closing your eyes and letting her hand embrace yours, you took a deep breath, and finally the last thought got foggy enough to let you talk.

“It’s good to see you all again!” You stammered through the microphone, earning the cheers of the room, even your members.

After some light chat between everyone sat at their places as the staff helped Insomias line up, they eagerly smiled, excited as they waited for their turn to go up and talk to all of you. Minji, who sat by your side, placed her hand over yours and only her glance and smile was enough to make you feel safe. 

Each one of the fans that talked to you beamed with light and joy, filling your table with so many gifts and letters that you wished you could give them back something more than just your signature. 

A cute, young little girl came hopping to your place holding her album in hand, carrying a very particular gift with her. A bag of chips that you hadn’t eaten since… since the day you returned home after the incident. After saying hello and quickly signing the album, she rushed into conversation with you, something you didn’t mind cause you were extremely curious about her gift.

“My grandpa remembered that you liked this type of chips,” The girl extended the gift to you, taking them with delivered surprise as your eyes scanned them. “He wanted me to tell you that he hopes you’re doing good and that he’s proud of you!”

“Wait, how did he know it was me?” You chuckled, apparently being grubby, behind a bucket hat, a baggy sweatshirt and lowering your voice was not enough to hide yourself.

“He says it was intuition. Or maybe just your voice.” The girl giggled nervously. “But when he came home that night, he told me that everything was going to be okay, that you were alright. I trust him.”

“He did help me a lot that day, your grandpa is a great man.” Your talking minute was running out, so you reached across the table and put your hands on her, offering her a warm smile. “Always be kind to everyone, who knows where I would be right now if it wasn’t for the kindness of your grandpa.”

“I will always be Unnie!” The girl squealed in happiness as she moved to the next seat to talk with Minji.

“Say hi to him!” You added last minute and she nodded before turning to take care of the fan now in front of you.

More and more gifts started milling up around you, even flower bouquets adorned your surroundings and the rest of DreamCatcher, the managers walking around and taking some of them away from you to store backstage so the entire table wouldn’t end up engulfed in gifts.

You were so into the fansign, talking to all your lovely Insomnias, that you didn’t notice beforehand about the one thing that unnerved you. Turning around to face the fan in front of you, there he stood, the ominous hooded guy. 

You tried greeting him with the same enthusiasm as the rest of your fans, but you were taken aback when instead of the usual cheery and giggle response, he just muttered a nonchalant ‘hi’ back at you.

You took his album, searching for the note with your name on it to know exactly where to sign. Finding it, you flicked to that page, but a cold chill traveled down your spine when you opened it.

Your pictures were scratched, painted and splattered over in a dark, thick, red tint. And over it, scribed in big black letters over everything, it read: 

‘DreamCatcher will always be 7’

Told you

“Wha-?”

You heard a clock that snapped your head up. Facing a gun pointed straight at you.

They’re going down and taking you down with them. One last time.

And then time stopped. A cold drop of sweat travelled down your spine, as a knot tightened in your throat. Your eyes wandered around, a hundred smiles completely oblivious to the sight right in front of you. All that was left was to close your eyes, hoping everything to be quick and painless.

“Y/N!” 

You heard your name be screamed just before a loud bang, returning you to this existential plane. But when your eyes shot open, you found yourself hitting the floor with your shoulder. 

A cacophony of screams and people in plain panic ensued, the hooded man was tackled into the ground, and people ran left and right unsure on where to run away.

You tried getting up to get a better view of everything happening on the other side of the table, but a sharp burning bolt of pain travelling your body all the way from your shoulder pinned you down in your place. You turned to it, your entire sleeve covered in a red, thick and warm liquid. Your arm limped, only hanging from your increased numbing shoulder. The tingle in the tip of your fingers increased and travelled through your palm as you stared in horror, as the puddle of blood extended through all your outfit.

“We need an ambulance!” You heard one of your managers shout from one side of the venue, as the noise in the auditorium got more and more muffled to your ears.

“Y/N!” Minji’s shadow covered the light above you as she approached, her heavy breathing and shaky voice calling your name over and over under her breath as she kneeled by your side. “Gosh, no, no”

“What’s going on?” You cried, barely any noise coming out of your mouth. Using your remaining strength, you reached with your hand towards your members, who urgently surrounded you. Along with other managers who moved fast around you, discussing stuff that you weren't able to hear anymore.

“We need to stop the bleeding, NOW!” Yubin commanded, looking around the place for something to surround your injury tightly around, Siyeon and Handong following closely behind her.

“Please don’t leave me,” As your eyes flooded with tears, you somehow managed to crawl into Minji’s lap, “Please.”

“Never, Y/n-” Her eyes full of tears as well, hold you close, not minding getting stained by the red liquid that surrounded you by now.

Painfully, you turned your head to watch around. Gahyeon and Bora were bawling their eyes out between each other's eyes, Yoohyeon kneeling beside Minji in an effort of calming down both of them.

“Here!” Handong came back with a large piece of cloth, quickly kneeling besides you and fasting it up tightly around your arm and shoulder with the help of Siyeon and Yubin. Minji was refusing to drop her hold on you.

“Unnie, I’m so sorry” Your throat stinged at the words, dried up of the tears that came non stop through your eyes. “I’m so sorry about everything.”

Your vision started fogging up, as you barely heard a siren outside, followed by the main door being pushed open, and voices of various people approaching. Fighting to keep your eyes, you wrapped one of your member's clothes with the remaining strength left in your body.

“Stay with us, please.” Siyeon’s voice was distant, but your eyes caught her lips moving as the words entered your brain. “Stay.”

But you couldn’t stop fighting against the weight of your eyelids. The noise surrounding you shut up completely, and the shadows that surrounded you were swallowed by complete darkness.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Day 135

I know they’re here. I can hear them sometimes, but they can’t hear me. How much time do you think they’ll keep up with you? Please don’t leave me. Please. 

Bora’s fingers traveled up and down your static hand with a gentleness that could put anyone to sleep. But this time it was the other way around. Surrounded by tubes full of unknown liquid flowing into your body, metal structures that seemed to keep the room’s gray walls from falling apart and the rattling but thankfully constant beeping of your heart monitor, everything she wished was for you to wake up.

Handong lay asleep across the couch on the other side of the bed, with only a weighted blanket covering her body from the chilly air circling the room, her head resting on the also asleep Yoohyeon who covered herself with around three thick jackets. The three of them volunteered to take the night watch in the hospital, replacing Minji and Yubin who refused to leave the hospital as you were received in the emergency room and stood by your side for the entirety of the first day. The managers insisted all of them to stay back at their dorm, but were quickly cut off by every girl, standing their ground on never letting you go again.

The first rays of sun peeked through the shades over the window, bringing a dim but warm light into the room with them. Bora’s tired eyes raised to watch the faint silhouette of the sunset through them. A knock on the door made her snap her head towards it, waking up the other two girls in the process.

“Come in?” Handong groggily whispered while standing up straight on the couch, rubbing her eyes.

The heavy door opened, revealing the other four members' tired faces behind it.

“How was your night?” Minji entered the room, hands deep in her pockets as she approached the feet of the bed, staring up and down at your weakened body laying before her. “Did you get some rest?”

The three girls already in the room shook their heads in unison, with Yoohyeon even burying her face between her hands.

“I never thought that a place so silent could be so…” She whispered, her eyes wandering all over the room, unfocused. “Restless.”

“There wasn’t much sleep at the dorm either.” Gahyeon added, sitting besides Bora as she carefully took a strand of hair away from your seemingly sleeping face. 

“We brought you some coffee…” Siyeon handed their drinks to Yoohyeon, Handong and Bora before sitting in a chair on the other corner of the room. “I hope it at least helps you stay awake”

“Any news?” Yubin closed the door behind her, laying against the wall. Crossing her arms as she scanned the room with her eyes.

“Well,” Bora stretched her arms, standing up from her chair as she kept stretching her entire body in the process. “The doctor said that everything is stable, all vital organs are okay and that Y/n will only need some rehabilitation in her arm and shoulder. So, she’ll be fine.”

Everyone let out a deep sigh of relief, as Gahyeon leaned down to leave a kiss on your temple, a fair smile crossing her lips.

“I’m sorry we couldn’t protect you enough.” Gahyeon whispered to you as she rested her head over her hands on the edge of the bed.

“But it shouldn’t be our responsibility to have to go around being careful and trying not to get killed,” Yubin scoffed as she paraded around the room. “That’s just sick.”

“I’m glad they caught that bastard.” Siyeon snapped. “And I hope he rots in the deepest rings of hell that disgusting son of a-”

“Siyeon, the kids!” Minji covered Gahyeon’s ears as she covered yours. Her expression softened for a second, twisting her lips in agreement. “But you do raise a very valid point.”

Minji let Gahyeon’s ears go slowly and cautiously, in case any of the older girls decided lo let their dirty tongue roam free again.

“But what I still don’t understand,” Yoohyeon rested her head over her knuckles, as she leaned forward over the edge of the couch. “How can there be people who still don’t want her in the group?”

“We will never make everyone happy,” Handong responded. “I wouldn’t be surprised if there was someone out there who still thinks you should have stayed with the Minx concept.”

The audible groans of Yoohyeon, Minji, Bora, Siyeon and Yubin filled the entire room, facepalms, shrinked shoulders, rolled eyes, their mouths hissing and lips twisting in a physically painful display of a cringy memory flooding their minds. The image encouraged a chuckle out of Gahyeon and Handong, who enjoyed teasing the others with their past.

“While I understood your point perfectly,” Yubin's unimpressed muffled voice stuttered. “there was absolutely no need to take it that far, thank you.”

“But she’s right,” Siyeon pointed out. “There’s people who don’t agree with us, but we now know there’s more people that actually like Y/n a lot! And, if she still wants to be in the group with us after all this, whoever doesn’t agree can walk through the door and never come back.”

“If she wants to be in the group?” Gahyeon glanced back at Siyeon, perplexed.

“Y/n’s been through a lot already,” Bora added. “Even though we love her, we wouldn’t force her to stay if she doesn’t want to.”

“And if she wants to go back home,” Siyeon continued. “We’ll respect her decision too.”

The atmosphere around the room got tense. Everyone understood and agreed perfectly, but it didn’t mean that they wouldn’t miss you if you decided to leave the group.

“Do you know when her family will come? The manager told us they were trying to contact them.” Yoohyeon asked the other girls, trying to break the awkward silence. “Maybe we’ll finally get to meet them”

“They won’t be coming.” Minji shook her head, resting her hands on the footboard of the bed.

“Are they foreigners or something?” Handong leaned her head, curious at the leader’s response. “We could help them fly here if they want to-”

“No, yesterday the managers finally told me the reason Y/n never really talks about her family, and I think it’s time all of you know.” She sighed, raising her head and placing herself somewhere where everyone could see and hear her clearly. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes to focus. “Y/n doesn’t really know her family.”

“What do you mean she doesn’t know her family?” Siyeon eyebrows furrowed, trying to understand the oldest’s words. 

“According to what I was told yesterday, she knows she had a family. But ever since she was a little child she had been jumping from foster home to foster home, until she became a trainee later.” Minji nodded, her lips forming a straight line as she got immersed in her own thoughts. Shaking them aside when she felt the pressure of the silence and the looks of the girls over her, she continued talking. “The staff was the one taking care of her after that and up until she debuted with us.”

“So, it’s almost as she doesn’t have a family.” Gahyeon trembled.

The stillness in the air became even more heavy over everyone’s shoulders now that it dawned on them the reality of the situation. 

The sun now fully out of the horizon peaked through the window, illuminating the room with its warmth and hopeful brightness. Almost like a sign from the universe, a ray of light rested amicable over your peaceful, sleeping face.

Bora placed her hand over yours, caressing it gently with her thumb. After a few minutes of slumberous and wary silence, like a spotlight calling to her to raise her eyes, she scanned around the room, a delicate smile making its way to her lips as she came to a realization. 

“Y/n does have a family.” Bora whispered, making all the girls raise their faces in confusion. One by one, as they locked their eyes with the other girls understood exactly what Bora was talking about, bringing kind grins into their faces.

As some happy tears started escaping some of the girls eyes, it dawned on them all your adventures together. All the hard and the pretty times, how everyone loved each other and accepted their highs and their lows. How every single one of them understood perfectly that blood is not what makes a family, but the unconditional love and support that all parts have for each other. Whatever you had going on in between, that was a family.

“She has us.” Yoohyeon nodded, posing her sight on your resting body. 

Swallowed sobs reigned the air until a soft hum stood out. Like a ritual that you all had together now, Yubin’s gentle singing filled the air, the other girls recognizing the song immediately. Your song. One by one the other girls joined her, harmoniously swelling their surroundings with a much needed drop of hope for their soul. As the song continued, each one of them cuddled towards each other, seeking the warmth and comfort of their arms. A silent promise to deliver this and so much more to you for the rest of your lives.

The song was arriving to their end, as silence once again reigned the room when a sigh from the leader broke through. 

“We’ll be here for Y/n, all the time she wants us to be by her side.” Minji flicked away a tear from her eye, nodding at her beautiful family around her.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Day 136

I’m still here, and I’m not going anywhere. As long as you live I’ll always be right behind you. I have so much left to give, just let me prove it.

A black canvas, covered in bright, sparkling freckles swallowed the sky, the horizon and the floor beneath you. The plain sound of your shaky breath echoed into eternity in every direction as you watched your feet walking on air. One step, two steps. Covered in a fair white robe, you felt the breeze dancing around you, but your skin didn’t perceive any cold from it, instead being embraced in a warm coating, from head to toe. Three steps, four steps. The stars around you didn’t seem to come closer or any farther as you kept advancing, but they all seemed to beat together at a constant beeping rhythm. Five steps. 

A pair of bare feet met yours in a perfect reflection, and as you slowly raised your eyes. Whoever was standing right in front of you was wearing the exact same white robe as you, moved their hands the same way, breathed the same way… looked the same. 

Standing right in front of a perfect reflection of yourself, you raised your hand towards your shoulder, pulling down the gown from it. Your reflection followed precisely, revealing your clean and well skin under. A relieved breath escaped your lips a little too soon, as quickly, a dark spot surged under your reflection's hand, spreading all over it’s arm, hand and chest. 

You leaped behind startled but your reflection didn’t follow through, instead, it started stomping towards you, as the darkness climbed all the way to it’s face. Your hand frantically searched for your shoulder, but there was nothing over yours.

“Who are you!?” You pleaded, running backwards to keep your distance with the impostor.

“Don’t you recognize me Y/n?” Your reflection's voice gritted through the air as a crooked smile was painted in it’s lips. “It’s me, the real you.”

“No, no you are not.” You gasped back, with a hit of doubt that didn’t go unnoticed by the entity in front of you.

“You see? Not even you know who you are.” The reflection reached it’s completely darkened hand towards you, inviting you closer. “Then what makes you think I can’t be you?”

“I-” You stuttered, the never ending starry void where you kept running away also allowed this creature to stay mere inches away from you, no matter how much you seemed to pull yourself far away from it. “Please go away.”

“You know I never will,” It tilted it’s head, sneering back. “Everyone around you has never loved you enough to stay, but I’ll be the only one faithfull by your side forever.”

It didn’t have to hit so low, but there was this little spark burning inside you that kept you up on your feet to keep running, to keep fighting. Through the sting in your eyes, you watched the stars start beeping at a faster rate, ready to try one more time.

“They haven’t left me yet,” You fired back. Your reflection glitched it’s presence before letting out an evil chuckle that echoed through the void.

“But you already know they will!” It scoffed, halting its steps. “Then why wait for it to hurt even more?”

“Because they waited for me.”

All signs of fun were erased from your reflection's face, letting you breath out for a second. But a disgusted smirk plastered across its face as it turned itself into someone else. The wide and gentle smile, her arms that always welcomed you in and her brown eyes that always made you feel safe.

“Minji Unnie?...” You gasped.

“And once again, you come in and ruin absolutely everything for us.” The voice was on point, making you trip over your feet and fall down in surprise. “It would have been best if you d-”

“I heard her! She said my name!” Minji’s voice bounced around, but not coming from the bizarre Minji standing in front of you. “Shhh, it’s okay, you’re okay.”

The creature before you took your form again, it’s breath angrily rising. It quickly shapeshifted to another form. 

“We don’t want you back!” It panted now as Bora, shouting to make its voice be heard over the accelerating heartbeat. “We don’t-”

“It’s okay, it’s all a dream!” Now it was Bora’s voice responding from beyond what your eyes could see. You saw your hand light up, warming up as if another hand graced on top of yours. “Everything’s gonna be okay. We’re here.”

The stars around you finally started getting closer, to both of you. The light engulfing both you and your reflection. It felt warm and gentle on your skin, but you couldn’t say the same thing for the other you in that place. 

Loud screeches of pain as it battled against the bright light touching it’s skin, shrinking against itself in its own place. You felt your feet floating, like a certain force pulling you up from the starry sky. You felt a cold hand grab you from the hem of your gown, as it’s colorless eyes searched painfully for yours.

“YOU’LL NEVER GET RID OF ME!” Your bizarre reflection snapped back at you in desperation, almost like a cry for help.

“Maybe,” You looked back at it, and just for a second, it’s eyes mirrored your human color instead of being a black, empty void. “But I’ll never stop trying.”

The bright light of the room filled your view, as your eyes snapped open. Trying urgently to adjust to the new light, your eyes blinked and scanned from side to side, as the blurriness slowly dissipated. A flash of pain escurried from your shoulder all the way up your chest, arm and head, as you looked down to a freshly closed wound, a gauze tenderly placed above your stitches. 

You looked at the shadows hovering above you, dazzled by the ceiling’s light once again when you turned your eyes up to one side. Two unknown faces, dressed up with scrubs were hurriedly taking your vitals, alternating the view between the monitors and you. Moving your eyes upward and to the other side, there they were. 

Bora rested her head on the edge, caressing your hand with her thumb, looking it you with the brightest eyes you had ever seen, and hovering just above her, Minji, flicking off a stray tear away from her face and Dami, a glowing smile adorning her face, one that cutely wrinkled her eyes as her eyes refused to leave you.

“You’re finally back.” Minji whispered as her tender grin grew up across her face. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”

Bora tenderly caressed your cheek as her own eyes filled with tears unwilling to drop. With the strength available in your body, you offered back a smile that immediately broke her. 

“We couldn’t bear the idea of losing you again,” She cried, clinging to your hand. “We missed you so much.”

“I’m not going anywhere Unnie, that’s a promise.” You mumbled back. 

“Precisely young lady, you are not allowed to go anywhere yet. At least until tomorrow” One of the nurses added, making all of us chuckle and lightening up the aura in the room. “Your vitals are running as they should and your recovery seems to be advancing correctly, you’ll be staying just one more day here.”

All the room cheered at the good news, relieved. You raised the bed to sit up and chat with the girls about everything that had been happening throughout the days, how the bastard that shot you was convicted and dealt with, with no mercy. They told you about how all the industry took steps to ensure the safety of the idols thanks to this incident, fundraisers in your name against gun violence and regulations, and they way the world looked at this with their own eyes.

“Here, take a look at this,” Dami handed you her phone, a playful smile as she did. “Would be better to focus on the good.”

“Wow…” You scrolled down an infinite stream of positive and supportive messages from Somnias all over the world. Outpouring love and comfort on every social media, erasing any doubt in your mind on how the people received you. “I didn’t think they would like me that much.”

“We had the same feeling when we debuted as DreamCatcher too.” Minji added, recalling her memory. “But at the end, the ones that really love you are the ones who stick around.”

“And the ones who don’t can shove their opinions up their-”

“Bora!” Minji covered your ears quickly, as she snapped her eyes towards the other girl.

You chuckled at the image, with Dami a few steps behind trying to keep her laugh too. But the moment was interrupted quickly by a knock on the door, followed by a nurse peeking her head inside.

“Sorry for interrupting,” She excused herself, “Your family came to see you!” 

“But I don’t have a fam-” 

“I’m not shutting you up the way I would like just because you’re still healing,” Siyeon’s voice accompanied her silhouette as she entered the room, a bouquet of flowers in hand. Followed by Handong, Yoohyeon and Gahyeon, each one carrying a present in their hands. “But as your official big sister, I’ll patiently wait until that arm works again to do it so.”

The remark made you giggle as you glanced at the girls and the radiant auras they carried with them. Now surrounded by an endless supply of snacks, courtesy of Yoohyeon and Handong, the sweet smell of fresh flowers by Siyeon and a new fluffy friend to hug by Gahyeon and a lot of laughs, you couldn’t help but let some tears drop from your eyes.

“Why are you crying?” Yoohyeon approached the bed, handing you a tissue.

“This must be how it feels like…” You stuttered. “Having a family.”

“But you have one!” Gahyeon, who was sitting in the bed with you chimed in. 

“I never told you before…” You swallowed, avoiding all their glances as you searched for the courage to come clean about your past. “But I have never met my family, so as far as I know, I don’t really have one.”

You looked up, only to be received by their tender smiles. Almost as if they already knew.

“What are we? Painted?” Handong sneered, making everyone laugh instantly. You giggled too, but your wondering eyes gave up that you were still a little confused.

“Family is so much more than blood lineage Y/n,” Minji added, trying to clear your mind. “And I really like the one that we have right here.”

Something clicked in your mind, calling even more tears to your eyes but a huge smile to your face. The girls all surrounded you in a careful but very welcome and warm hug. Submerged in the comfortable silence surrounding all of you, you could listen to some of the girls crying too. 

But it didn’t matter anyway, you had everything that you ever wanted now. 

“We’ll always be here for you Y/n.” Gahyeon whispered as she took your hand in hers. “We ain’t going nowhere.”

You nodded chuckling, cleaning some of your tears away from your cheeks, but they didn’t stop coming out of your eyes.

“Well, since you're being dismissed tomorrow,” Bora tried to light up the atmosphere a little. “What should we do to celebrate?”

“I suggest an arm wrestling tournament!” Siyeon barged in with a loud chuckle, making everyone turn around to face in disapproval. “It- It was just a joke.”

“But yeah! Putting all dangerous stuff outside,” Handong giggled looking back at you. “What do you want to do tomorrow when we’re finally back home?”

You scanned around at the bright faces surrounding you, each one bringing up that warm sensation on your chest. You had no idea what you did to deserve this much love in your life, but whatever it was, there was no way you would let it slip through your fingers again.

“Wherever you are,” You answered. “I’m already home.”