#i CAN go saturdays i guess but i feel like bc they close at 6 saturday and id be going there arond ~4:15-4:30... theyd probably be starting
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crownconstellation · 5 months ago
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i have off friday so i'm going to go to the farmer's market for the first time in a couple of years :-)
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billiejeanenthusiast · 1 year ago
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List of random thoughts 5/7/23
I’m now kind of an adult in the workforce and I have yet to need to transition my make up or clothes “from day to night”. Magazines really lied to me.
I honestly need a Taylor code. Not just bc I really want to see her live. I do. I really do. But bc I just need one good thing to happen to me in life. Lately it’s been rough.
I’m surprised the White House didn’t have a cocine scandal before. It’s literally called White House with the amount of high stress and high stakes I’d bet good Lokey it’s harder to find someone NOT doing cocaine than someone doing it.
I just saw a hot silver fox in his 50s dressed in a crisp shirt and suit pants parking his black Vespa next to the restaurant in my building. And that whole situation is so: Mediterranean summer at lunch hour.
I love Hart of Dixie. The show. I could write an essay on it. I’ve rewatched it so many times. I guess sometimes I’m just nostalgic for living in such a close knit community and small town.
Saturday morning I’m gonna step on that plane with a never bigger mix of emotions. How can I both love to return to a place and have someone absolutely ruining it for me so much I dread going back. I’m so happy to return. But I have the biggest stone in my stomach over it. I hate this feeling.
I hate the 2024 f1 calendar. Not bc it’s bad. But bc my life is so chaotic and I just can’t plan anything. And it makes me sad.
I should’ve taken a pill for my headache before I went to the post office. There’s just one person working and 11 people and it’s SO SLOW
I genuienly do think I’m someone who is happy just with the little things in life.
I GOT THE ERAS TOUR TICKETS CODES FOR SALE….and then immediately I realised that means nothing bc there’s still the whole war of actually buying the ticket.
I think I’ll probably sob through a solid 5-6 songs on that concert.
I think I’ll download glitter conspiracy videos to watch on my flight home.
Or actually no. It’s right the morning after Speak Now TV comes out. I’ll just spend the 45min listening to that.
It scared me that I’m 26 and I don’t feel a day older than like 23/24. I don’t know how to explain it. I’m scared to even say it to people. I just…is there something wrong with me? I blame COVID. I lose two years of my life.
I don’t think there is a single type of chocolate inverted that I would not like. Chocolate and shiny jewellery is the key to my heart. And no I don’t care that it sounds or is basic. Give me a pretty bracelet and some Belgian chocolates for an anniversary or just random day and you will get the freakiest dream come true sex of your life.
I feel like lately the whole universe has been a bit unhinged. Everyone and everything just seems on a looser tether. I can’t properly put into words the feeling but everything feels like it’s way closer to an edge than it was and that balancing on that edge is wobbly. People are more unhinged. The universe and what’s happening. A bunch of people I know have been having the most awful period of their lives. Others have been up to things the fbi couldn’t even come up for a fictional scenario. I too am a bit victim to this. I feel like I just …care less about any perception of me than ever before.
I would love to do one of those colour analysis things but they all feel just so incredibly MLM-ish to me. I’m not saying they are. They just give me that Avon and Mary Kay vibe.
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meltwonu · 4 years ago
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| 🎃 𝕸𝖔𝖓𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖍 🎃 |
↪ ✦ playdate ✦
this chapter pairing; yandere!wonwoo x reader, side mingyu x reader
genre&warnings; yandere!wonwoo, kinda asshole!mingyu, creampies, sloppy seconds, intoxication, exhibitionism AND voyeurism, masturbation, dirty talk, one sided pining for all!!, kidnapping, stalking.
✖ That being said, I do NOT condone yandere-like/obsessive/possessive behaviour in real life. this is a work of fiction therefore I will indulge in it. If you do NOT like this kind of content, please just ignore it.
notes; if I’m being honest, the draft for this originally was completely different and I reworked it because I wasn’t satisfied with how it was turning out bc it was too similar to sea castles except mingyu and wonwoo were brothers kjdhfdkjh 😭😭 As always, thank you sooo much for the love and interest in Monster Mash! I know last chapter was.... erm, a lot. LMAO 😆 Have a great rest of your day/night and I’ll see yall tomorrow~! 🎃 👻 💕
word count; ~3800
chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - x - x - x - x - x - x
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you call me on the telephone, you feel so far away;
you tell me to come over, there’s some games you wanna play
i’m walking to your house, nobody’s home;
just me and you and you and me alone.
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The relationship you share with Mingyu isn’t necessarily one that you like to talk about, much less acknowledge on most days.
“O-oh, fuck, M---Mingyu!”
It’s purely physical and a little destructive, in your opinion. Especially when you found yourself frustratingly liking him more than you ever imagined.
He bends your leg, ankle resting against his shoulder as he angles his thrusts to graze against your sweet spot. Shapes dance behind your eyelids, lips parting in a silent moan when you feel yourself already close to cumming.
But it’s Mingyu that cums first, hips stuttering as he growls, “That’s right, fuckin’ take all of it, baby.”
He rides out his high, pulling out of you and letting your leg down before you can even process what’s happening. “Hey, wait, but what about me?” You ask, voice small as you watch him get off of the bed. He tugs his pants on, plucking a shirt off of the floor as he throws it over his head.
“Sorry, I gotta go take care of some business back at campus, Mr. Lee needs the papers graded before tomorrow’s 8AM and I’m already late. You can stay here if you want though, bed’s all yours. I’ll be back in a bit, I---sorry, I’ll make it up to you later.”
He’s gone in a flash, door clicking shut behind him as you sit with your legs still parted. Typical.
Groaning, you flop onto your back against his bed sheets.
“Thanks for nothing.”
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Wonwoo says it’s the last time.
But every time is the last time.
He wraps a hand around his cock, soft breaths making the window fog up in front of him as he watches you and Mingyu through the window. He times the movement of his hand to match Mingyu’s thrusts as he pretends it’s your warmth wrapped around his cock and not his own fist.
“Fuck, fuck , fuck…” He whispers in succession, feeling his abdomen tightening as he gets closer and closer to an orgasm.
Wonwoo watches as Mingyu bends your leg over his shoulder, mental images of you underneath him instead.
He remembers the first time he’d seen you in Mingyu’s bedroom, curiosity making him watch through his bedroom window as you fell to your knees in front of the other male. Wonwoo knew better than to watch, so he looked away, cheeks burning crimson before he ever so slowly turned back to the window. 
He couldn’t help it.
Wonwoo had seen you around the university campus too, hanging around the art kids in the building opposite the Sciences building where he typically stayed with his small group of friends; Mingyu included. He thought you were cute and kind, especially when you happened to hang around their group for the day. And he liked you, even if he was too shy to ever say it.
Which was precisely why he couldn’t understand your attraction to Mingyu, of all people.
Mingyu was selfish, almost irritatingly so, and Wonwoo knew.
Wonwoo knew you deserved better too, someone much like himself. Someone who would take care of you better than Mingyu ever could.
Movement in the opposite window has Wonwoo pulling himself from his thoughts, brows furrowed when he sees Mingyu leaving and you still alone in the bedroom.
“What…?” He mumbles, slightly confused when he watches you flop onto your back.
God, what he would do to eat you out right now.
He tightens his grip around his cock, this time imagining himself eating you out, tongue against your clit while you moan out his name and tangle your fingers into his hair. 
A stuttered moan falls from his lips as he cums into his palm, eyes clamped shut as the pleasure washes over him.
Wonwoo promises it’s the last time.
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“Hey, did you hear about Jeonghan’s Halloween party next Saturday?”
“He’s throwing one?”
“Yeah, I heard everyone’s invited too.”
Wonwoo pretends to go through his textbook as he eavesdrops instead.
If everyone was invited, that surely meant that you’d be there too.
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Mingyu glances over at you, tapping his pencil against the corner of his textbook. “Hey…” He starts, “Did you hear about Jeonghan’s party?”
You glance up from your own textbook, bored eyes on Mingyu who looks up at you from his bedroom floor. Neither of you had talked about the previous time; opting to forget about it since it wasn’t the first time either. “What about it?”
“Wanna go with me? I’ll make it up to you for last time.”
No, he wouldn’t.
“I guess.”
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You step out of the Film Developing room, arms full of negatives when you accidentally run into a body that walks up from behind.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” The negatives spill to the floor, scattering all around you as you and the other person kneel down to collect them.
“It’s okay.” The deep voice replies.
“Oh, hey, Wonwoo!” You smile, “What are you doing in the Arts Building?”
He blushes a deep red, kneeling and stacking the negatives before placing them back in your arms. “Oh I--I do some film editing on my own and I--um, I was just wandering around. I had some free time, so I was curious.” Wonwoo shoots you a shy smile as he pushes his glasses up on his nose bridge.
Wonwoo was very cute.
“Oh! I didn’t know that! I feel like I’ve never seen you around here…” You trail off.
“Ah, yeah, I actually have a personal studio on the east end of town. It’s small but… I don’t have to share my things, which I’d prefer.” He smiles, eyes twinkling. “It’s no fun when people mess around with your things and ruin them, y’know?”
“Oh my gosh, I knooooow. Minghao always messes up my developing station and moves my shit around.” You keep talking but Wonwoo barely acknowledges it. Instead, he takes in your appearance, admiring you as you talk animatedly about god knows what.
God, why’d it have to be Mingyu.
“Hey, so are you coming on Saturday?” He blinks confusedly at you, “Huh? Sorry, I--I didn’t quite catch that last bit.”
“Oh, Jeonghan’s party! Everyone’s invited so I was wondering if you were coming!” His blush burns darker; were you asking him out?
“I’ll be there with Mingyu but if you show up, you should save me a drink!” His excitement falters slightly at the mention of Mingyu, but he does his best to send you a reassuring smile.
“Of course, I’ve got one with your name on it.”
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Wonwoo was kind, patient and understanding from what you knew.
You’d only met him a few times and you knew he lived in the building across from Mingyu’s but all of your interactions with him had only ever been pleasant.
In another universe, maybe you would’ve been in a happy relationship with someone like Wonwoo.
A sigh escapes your lips as you get ready for Jeonghan’s party; short dress barely covering your ass when Mingyu saunters into his bathroom where you currently were.
“Jeez, who’re you trying to impress.” He mumbles, sidestepping you as he checks himself in the mirror.
“I just felt like being cute, that’s all.”
Mingyu grins, hands on your waist before they slide down to your ass. He squeezes hard; a chuckle on his lips when you mewl.
“Cute isn’t the word I’d go for with this ‘lil number but okay. Let’s get going.”
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Mingyu drinks more than he should and he knows it.
He takes any drink someone puts in his hands and downs it before trying to find more which usually leads to a lot of 2AM drunk phone calls and quickies in the backseat of your car.
This time, however, you’re just as bad as he is; taking any drink available as you try to drown out the way you feel when you see Mingyu chatting up someone else across Jeonghan’s living room.
To be fair, you weren’t exclusive anyway.
But his eyes dance over to you, a cocky smirk on his face when he sees the effect he has on you. He knew how you felt too, even if you never said a word about it.
Mingyu didn’t want to ruin what the two of you had, even if he benefited from it more than you did. And the two of you were friends, albeit you weren’t sure for how much longer.
He leaves the other girl as he makes his way over to you, eyes unfocused when he presses you into the wall you’d been standing in front of.
“Let’s go somewhere more private.”
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“Ngh, M--Mingyu, fuck--fuck, harder!”
Mingyu keeps you bent over the sink, hips slamming into your ass as he fucks you from behind in Jeonghan’s upstairs bathroom.
The loud music drowns out your loud moans and his filthy words as you eagerly fuck yourself on his cock. “Fuck, this tiny little dress of yours doesn’t do a damn thing. Bet you wanted me to fuck you just like this, huh? Bent over a fuckin’ sink at a party.”
Neither of you had even made the effort to get undressed as you hiked your dress up and tugged your panties to the side, hands planted firmly onto the mirror in front of you as you watched yourself get drunk off of his cock.
“G-god, yes, yes! Fuck me h-harder, damn it!” You whine. Mingyu slaps your ass at this, low grunts spilling from his lips. “Your cute ‘lil cunt begging to be filled with my cock at every second of the fuckin’ day. “ He slurs.
He feels his cock throbbing as he erratically thrusts into you, only a low groan on his lips before he’s cumming.
“O-oh, shit…”
You feel his thrusts slow down as he cums inside of you, a soft mewl on your lips at the feeling. You clench around him, shaking your hips slightly to get his attention back on you.
A sharp knock scares you both as Mingyu pulls out of you; panties slipping back into place like they’d never been touched.
“Hey! People need to use the bathroom, assholes!” Someone yells from the opposite side.
“Fuck, we need to go.” Mingyu grumbles, readjusting himself and zipping his denim back up.
You very slowly lift yourself up from leaning on top of the sink, tugging your dress back down quietly.
Of course. Of, fucking, course.
Mingyu can sense the annoyance even without you saying anything, lopsided smile on his features. “Later, okay? Don’t be a brat.”
“Whatever.”
You head for the door, unlocking it before you step out first and leave Mingyu behind. Your body still buzzes with the urge to cum when you start heading down the hallway, panties sticking to you like a second skin with Mingyu’s cum pooling into the material. You turn a corner into an empty part of the upstairs hallways, sighing slightly as you lean up against a wall.
You hear your name being called as you turn your head, finding Wonwoo jogging up to you.
“Hey! I was looking for you!” He smiles, noting the way you seem to sadly smile back at him. “Something the matter?”
“Ugh, it’s Mingyu…” You start. Wonwoo tenses up, hands balling into fists at his side. “What did he do?”
“He’s so fucking selfish! I don’t know what’s up with him lately but he always leaves me hanging!”
Oh.
It’s quiet between the two of you as your words sink in and Wonwoo’s demeanor changes in the blink of an eye. He takes a step closer to you, fingertips under your chin to lift your head up as he meets your blown out pupils.
“I wouldn’t leave you hanging, y’know.”
You feel a wave of arousal wash over you at his deep voice; did Wonwoo always sound like that or was it the alcohol? “W-what?”
“I said, I wouldn’t leave you hanging. I’d put you before myself, if you’d let me.” He smirks at you, eyes twinkling with promise.
“Show me then.”
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Wonwoo drags you into the nearest bedroom; excitement coursing through his veins.
In another universe, he would’ve been more romantic about this.
Dinner and candles, picnics at sunset. Ah, well.
“Well, it’s not much but it’ll do.” He says, locking the door behind himself before he turns to you. He takes in your mildly disheveled appearance, walking you backwards until the back of your legs hit the bed.
“You deserve better, y’know? Someone who’ll take care of you.”
“I know… But you promised you’d show me, didn’t you?” Pouting, you hike your dress up before you sit down on the edge of the bed. You spread your legs as you let Wonwoo see your panties that were practically transparent.
“Fuck, you let him cum inside your tight ‘lil pussy and he didn’t even let you cum?”
“How do you know I’m tight if you never fucked me before.” You retort, shooting him a smirk of your own. Maybe it was the alcohol in your system, but you felt more confident now than you’d been in a long while.
Wonwoo leans over you, easing you down until your back touches the sheets. “Only someone as pretty as you would have a tight ‘lil cunt and I’ll prove it.” He pulls away, undoing the button and zipper of his pants before he shimmies his boxer briefs down enough to pull his half hard cock out.
You lick your lips at the sight; he was slightly bigger than Mingyu. “Fuck, your cock is huge, Wonwoo…” He smirks at your compliment, tugging on your legs until your lower half hangs off of the side of the bed. He eases your wet panties down, pocketing them before he spreads your legs wide.
“I’m not typically one for sloppy seconds, but…” You blush at his comment. “...If it’s you, I don’t care.”
“Usually I wouldn’t have someone else’s cum already inside my fuckin’ pussy before I hook up with someone else...” You mumble.
Wonwoo guides his cock towards you, letting the shaft rest against your folds. He starts grinding against you, coating his cock in your wetness and Mingyu’s cum. His cock is already throbbing as he continues to tease you and himself, resisting the urge to fuck you hard and fast like he knew both of you needed. “S’okay, I’ll just have to cum inside you too and fuck it so deep into your fuckin’ cunt that you won’t even remember Mingyu ever did.” He grins.
“God, yes, make me cum too, I wanna cum with you…” Whining, you buck your hips up to meet his teasing touches.
“Don’t worry, baby, I’ll make sure you get my cock nice ‘n wet.” He positions his cock at your entrance, teasing you one more time as you whine and squirm underneath him. “Fuck, you’re so cute when you’re whiny.”
He slowly eases his cock in, meeting no resistance with how wet you already were and the cum already inside you. “God, you really are fuckin’ tight…” Wonwoo mumbles under his breath.
It takes you a second to adjust to Wonwoo’s size before he’s drawing his hips back and thrusting back into you and a mewl cuts through the air when the head of his cock taps against your cervix; eyes fluttering shut with how well Wonwoo filled you up.
“Oh, god, ngh, Wonwoo I--I don’t know if I--I can hold o-off…” A choked cry rolls off of your lips, fingertips digging into the sheets underneath you as you cant your hips up to meet his thrusts. You’d already gotten close to an orgasm before and now that Wonwoo’s cock was snug between your walls and curving into you perfectly, it was hard to hold back.
“That’s okay, baby. You can cum as many times as you want. Use me how you want me.” He offers; voice gentle and inviting as you wrap your legs around his waist.
“P--please, ah, touch my---my clit…”
Wonwoo obliges, pinching and rolling your clit between his fingertips. “O-oh, fuck!”
Your body locks up, Wonwoo’s name spilling from your lips as he throws you over the edge and into the first mind-melting orgasm you’d had in weeks. He smiles dreamily at you, hips still snapping into you as he fucks you through your high.
“So fuckin’ pretty when you’re cumming.”
You can only whimper in response, blushing when you can hear how much wetter you’d gotten after just one orgasm. He takes his fingers off of you clit, licking the wet digits.  
Wonwoo looks down to where the two of you are connected, a soft groan on his lips when he sees how much of your wetness coats his cock. “You really did get my cock fuckin’ soaked, baby. Think you still have it in you to give me one more? I’m close too and, ah, I’d love for you to cum with me.” He shoots you a sweet smile and you feel your heart beat out of your chest.
You nod feverishly, “Mm--Mmhmm… I---I haven’t c-cum in a few weeks so… I--”
“A few weeks?”
You avert your eyes from his inquisitive stare, already knowing how he’s going to react. “Yeah, s’just Mingyu’s been so busy so… He’s been, hah, kinda’ leaving me h-hanging and---Ah!” Wonwoo thrusts into you hard, grinding against you once he was fully bottomed out.
“For weeks now? He’s been treating you like that?” It’d made sense now why he’d seen you in Mingyu’s bed alone that one time. “Y-yeah… but---but he’s just busy, y’know, ah, being a TA and a-all...”
He shakes his head in utter disbelief; selfish Mingyu, as always.
Wonwoo leans in until he’s face to face with you, kissing you on the lips gently before pulling away. He doesn’t say another word and instead works on getting you worked up to cum with him and even through the muffled music, he can hear your loud whines and whimpers and the sound of skin slapping as his thrusts become erratic.
He licks the pad of his thumb before he brings it back towards your sensitive and swollen clit. “Baby, ‘m close…” He whispers; only loud enough for you to catch.
“Ngh, fuh--fuck, Wonwoo, please cum i-inside me… I wanna feel your, ah, cock throbbing i-inside of me when you fill me up with y-your cum…” Wonwoo’s thumb presses harder against your clit and he opts to grind against you instead when he feels the tension in his abdomen start to snap. He moans your name shakily, brows furrowed and eyes clamped shut as he lets the pleasure wash over him.
You lick your lips watching his face contort in bliss and you bring your fingers down and over his thumb as you press down harder onto your clit and the action is enough to throw you over the edge again, head thrown back and a sharp whine on your lips as you cum for the second time. 
Wonwoo slows down his thrusts as he starts to come down from his high and he works you through yours. “Shit, you really are so fuckin’ pretty.” 
A blush coats your skin as your orgasm starts to ebb away and Wonwoo is careful to not hurt you once he starts to pull his cock from inside of you. 
He watches the cum drip out of you, lips pursed into a tight smile. “Guess you should get these back, huh?” He fishes for the wet panties in his pocket; helping you slide them back on and up your legs before he pulls away and starts to smooth down his own disheveled appearance.
You laugh breathily, “I’ll let you have another pair next time.” 
“Oh? There’ll be a next time?” He grins. 
Biting your lip, you stand, readjusting your dress and grimacing at how gross you felt now that your panties were even wetter and covered in more cum. 
“I---I mean, I still... I still have feelings for Mingyu but--but...” You pause; Wonwoo’s eyes on you. “I know I should end things with him, it’s just gonna take some time and I--I think you’re a really great guy, Wonwoo, and I’d like for there to be a next time... It’s just... I think I need some time to get over Mingyu first.” You mumble the last few words, a little embarrassed you even admitted you liked Mingyu. 
“No, I---I get it. It’s no worries! Just---Just come find me when you’re ready.” He shoots you a beaming smile, “I’ll leave first, okay?” 
You nod in response, smiling at his back when he turns to leave. 
“Thank you, Wonwoo.” 
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You end up heading home, leaving Mingyu at Jeonghan’s party all-together.
He’d find his way home eventually; maybe even puke in the backseat of a taxi and get what he deserved. 
You giggle at the thought, stepping into the lobby of your apartment building.
Huh, the lights are out. 
You’re a little confused, but you make your way towards the elevators; stumbling slightly with the alcohol still in your system. Pressing the button, you wait patiently in the dark lobby -- only the moonlight providing a soft glow. 
The elevator dings and you quickly enter it, pressing the button for your floor before resting against the banister. 
Hey, is that a person?
Your eyes catch a glimpse of a figure not too far off and only half visible from around the corner, brows furrowed. 
But you didn’t hear anyone enter the building.
The door closes and you shake the thoughts out of your head; it was probably just the alcohol making your eyes hazy.
Eventually you reach your floor, sighing in relief that the lights were still working. You stumble down the hall, dropping your house keys a few times before you can even make the turn to get to your hallway.
You reach your door, sliding the key into the keyhole and turning the lock.
God, it was so good to finally be home. 
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“Good Evening, this is Boo Seungkwan reporting live on Channel 17’s 4 o’ clock news. We’re live at the scene here, as you can see behind me, at the apartment complex were Mr. Kim Mingyu resided. The police and detectives are still going through Mr. Kim’s apartment in hopes of finding any clues. His whereabouts are still unknown as well as his female companion. If you have any tips or information of where they both are, please do not hesitate to contact the police or the TV station.” Seungkwan pauses, waving down a pedestrian. “Sir? I’m a reporter for Channel 17 news, can we please have a word with you? It’s about the missing university students.”
Wonwoo sadly smiles, nodding. “Of course.”
Seungkwan gestures for the cameraman to come closer, holding the microphone in between himself and Wonwoo. “Sir, did you happen to know the missing couple?”
“Ah… Kind of. They were attending the same university as myself. He was kind of a friend of mine, and I know he lived in the building across from myself but…” Wonwoo pauses, shaking his head. “I--I don’t know what happened. They seemed like such kind people. I’ve heard rumours that they just fled to another city, but… that’s it really.”
“Did they tell you that, themselves?” Wonwoo shakes his head no. “No, just rumours flying around campus. Everyone saw them at a party last weekend, myself included. That seems to have been the last time.”
“I see, so have the police interviewed you? Do they have any suspects?”
Wonwoo shakes his head again, smiling sadly. “The police just think they ran away, which, I guess isn’t too far fetched. We’re all stressed university students, after all.”
“You mentioned he’s a friend of yours. He didn’t bother to say anything? Do you think he kidnapped her?”
Wonwoo bites the inside of his cheek, worry clear on his features. “I mean, Mingyu was kind of aloof and he was very drunk at that party. I’m not sure if they got into an altercation. We never really hung out outside of campus so sadly, I can’t really say I know if it’d be in his character or not.”
“Thank you sir, for your time.”
Seungkwan lets Wonwoo leave, stepping away to finish the live report.
Wonwoo nods, turning to make his way back into his apartment. 
He enters his place, toeing off his shoes before he heads towards his own bedroom.
By nature, he steps in front of his window; the same one that faced Mingyu’s now empty bedroom.
His lips ease into a small peaceful smile. 
He would have to make a trip to the east end once all the news vans and patrol cars were gone.
He was sure you’d love the food he’d be making for your candle-lit dinner. It was one of his favorite recipes.
And he was sure Mingyu wouldn’t mind watching from his place in the corner, either. 
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footballxwrites · 4 years ago
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a mason one where you're an exchange program student and you had told yourself that you woudn't date anyone in London bc you would be leaving by the end of the program, but you and mase meet and everything changes (a little bit of slow burn please?) | thank you your writting is AMAZIIINNNG xoxo
Thank you so much, you’re amazing anon x
Writing this made me realise how much I miss London and that I can’t wait to go back after lockdown and all because it’s been a while, hope you enjoy reading this...once again I did not spellcheck it because I’m a lazy sod so any mistakes are my fault 😅
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“I’ll still never get used to that” you giggled as the two of you exited the underground at Waterloo and entered the cool, frosted streets of London, “lived here two years and It still scares me every time” he laughed, referring to the dodgy tube yous had just been on.
“It’s cold out tonight isn’t it” you said through a trembly voice, feeling a shiver go up your spine and an arm drop over your shoulder and pull you close, “no you’re just a massive softie” he joked, rolling his eyes as you lightly elbowed him in the ribs making him wince, “where I’m from there’s palm trees surrounding my house, the sun’s always out and it’s a good 30° degrees every day” you challenged back as he held his hands up in defeat, “fair play, can’t argue with that. Anyways how long until you’re back in roasting LA?” he asked inquisitively, raising an eyebrow as you let out a sigh. “About 6 weeks, maybe 7 if I’m lucky. Just depends on when the program ends...but I’m in no rush to leave” you huffed, shoving your hands in your pocket and setting your gaze to the scenery around you, “believe it or not I’m going to miss this place, the landmarks, the cobbles, the massive buildings, even the rain and that damp city smell” you continued as you received a look of confusion from your friend, “I know I know I’m strange alright” you smiled as he shook his head, “you can say that again London gal” he grinned as the pair of you strolled by the river Thames.
“Ok I guess I’ll miss the people too...that includes you bestie” you said, stopping in your tracks before sitting on a bench, taking advantage of the city that never sleeps in all its glory at night, “I feel so loved” he dramatically gasped, placing a hand on his heart, settling down beside you as you presented him with a fake frown, “suppose it’ll be strange not seeing your beautiful face on the daily” he warmly smiled, making your heart beat about 10 times faster and that fluttery feeling fill your belly. Although you knew he was of course joking (well you could only assume as that lad was never serious about anything) you couldn’t help but wonder why his words meant so much to you and made you feel all weird inside, “shut up Mount, you’re kidding yourself there” you laughed, playing off and resting your head on his shoulder.
The last thing you planned on doing during your visit here was falling for a guy you’ll most likely never see again in your life and for the many months of your stay so far, you had always seen Mason as just a friend, a mate who you can have random late night chats with or movie nights stuffing your faces full of chocolate, so why was it now you had began to catch feelings.
“You have to promise me you’ll stay in contact with me ok? Like I still want all our midnight talks and stuff” you muttered, looking up at him as he sat with a cheesy smirk on his face, “oh yeah definitely, could never ditch the night time chats” he winked before shifting his view back to the river in front of him.
“Let me take you out, for dinner...how about next Saturday?” he said, taking you by surprise to say the least before you gently nodded, taking your head off his shoulder and staring into his eyes, “yeah I’m not at Uni on weekends so that’d be perfect,are we talking like a date or something casual...just so I know what to wear” you asked, a little too quickly for Mason not to notice your eagerness. “Oh it’s a date alright, let’s make it a special one before you head back home” he grinned, standing up and offering you a hand, which you happily took, as the pair of you made your way through the breezy London night, enjoying one another’s company.
Right now you couldn’t care less about going back to America, about the program ending, in fact you weren’t even sure if you wanted to go back to LA, well not permanently anyways, London had become a second home to you and it would seem a real shame to leave it behind. Not to mention a certain someone you met and soon became your best friend and the one person you could have a laugh and feel young and free with...maybe a fresh start here after graduation was just what you needed 🤍
@champagne-coys @footballcloud @jamesmaddiscnx @kierantierncy @kingkepa @footballmagical @alexajanecollins
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krisdreaming · 5 years ago
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heY KUROO DRUNK GIRL STORY PART 3 PLEASE???????🥺
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Eheheh I know, I know, it took me long enough, but here it is!!! The thrilling conclusion ;) This is pretty much just a self-indulgent first date with Kuroo scenario and it got really long oops :’) (tagging @igetcarriedawaywithyou bc I had to screenshot your ask - lmk if you want me to untag you!)
Part 1 | Part 2
-
“I think I’m gonna throw up.” You announce to your roommate, fidgeting with your phone in your lap as you wait for 6:00. She shakes her head.
“I don’t understand why you’re so nervous. You weren’t this nervous before your last date.”
You laugh wryly. “Yeah, and look what happened then!” You think back for the hundredth time, and shudder at the though of what could have happened - if it weren’t for Kuroo.
“I have a feeling this Kuroo guy isn’t going to stand you up.” She stabs her spoon into her bowl of ice cream, taking a giant spoonful. 
“I know.” You sigh. “I know!” You repeat more convincingly, a small smile coming to your face. You’ve been texting with Kuroo almost non-stop for the past week, and you haven’t felt this way about a guy for a while. If you’re honest, that’s what scares you the most.
“Besides, he’s picking you up here, and you’re not even going to a bar.” Her words are muffled around the ice cream in her mouth. “And you’re already half in love with him.”
“Am not.” You say, a little too quickly. She’s gracious enough to let it go with nothing more than a sly smile. Of course you’re not in love with him yet. You’ve only met him in person once, and circumstances were far from ideal. But with time - who knows? You shake your head before you can go too far down that rabbit trail.
Your phone chimes. He’s waiting for you outside. You swallow back the sudden bubble of nausea and get to your feet.
“Well, he’s here. I’ll see you later!” You give your roommate a wave and head for the door.
“Don’t hurl!” She calls after you cheerfully. You shut the door behind you without giving her a second glance.
“Hey.” Kuroo pushes away from the wall where he’d been waiting when he catches sight of you. He flashes you a smile that you can’t help but return. You’d been secretly wondering if he’d do something about his hair for your date, but it looks just as unruly as it had that night. For some reason, there’s something comforting about that fact, and you feel your nerves slowly begin to lessen.
“Hi.” You greet him, falling into step beside him.
“I do have to give you a disclaimer.” He says immediately. “We’re not exactly going to a coffee shop, but there’s this really cool place I want to show you. You’ll love it.” He promises. “We’ll have to take the train, though, if that’s alright with you.” He knocks his arm against yours.
“Fine with me.” You smile. After he learned that you’d only recently moved to the city, he insisted that he had to show you some of his favorite spots. You’re curious to see just what he has in mind.
The train is full, so you both end up standing. You’re used to being packed into the train at times, it comes with living in such a large, busy city, but you’re especially aware of him so close to you. When the train lurches, he has a hand at your elbow to make sure that you don’t lose your balance. You flash him a quick smile. Somehow, in the short time you’ve known him, it seems he’s always the one looking out for you.
By the time you get off the train, twilight has just begun to fall. The city is bathed in the orange glow of the setting sun, and it plays across Kuroo’s face. You duck your head when you realize he’s caught you staring, but all he does is smile and reach for the back of his neck.
 You walk a few blocks from the train station. “This way.” He guides you, and you take a turn down a quieter street, with fewer apartment buildings and business storefronts and more small shops. You’ve never been down this way before. It seems like a nice area to spend a Sunday afternoon.
“There’s a lot of cool places around here.” Kuroo speaks up. “They have great ramen there.” He points to a small restaurant, one you wouldn’t have even noticed if it wasn’t pointed out to you. “Oh, and that’s an amazing little coffee shop. They have the best brownies.” The small shop has a hand-painted sign in the window. You look at him in amazement.
“How do you find out about all of this stuff?”
He grins. “Lots of exploring. I just really enjoy it, you know? Finding all the little hole-in-the-wall places that most people don’t know about. It’s like a hidden treasure. There’s more places like that than you think.”
“Oh.” You breathe. “That sounds like so much fun.”
“Yeah?” He knocks his arm against yours again. You aren’t sure if it’s intentional, but you still feel your face getting warm. “Well I’ll have to take you sometime. I drag Kenma out with me most weekends.” Kenma - his best friend you note mentally. He’s talked about him before.
“I would really like that.” You nod. Your first date isn’t over, and he’s already talking about the second, as naturally as could be. You can’t help but smile to yourself. Whatever nerves and uncertainties you had been feeling earlier today, they’re completely dissolving.
“It’s just a few more blocks ahead.” He says, and you watch in front of you, your curiosity building. Finally, you approach a park of sorts, and as soon as you pass through the entrance you stop, looking around yourself in wonderment. There’s a walking path, and all along it are trees strung full of fairy lights. Their glow illuminates the intricately carved statues interspersed between them. There are a few small vendor carts as well, selling coffee and various festival foods. After a few moments of taking it in, you feel Kuroo’s hand nudge yours.
“So, what do you think?” He leans toward you and asks in a hushed voice.
“This is beautiful.” You breathe out. “I’ve never seen anything like this.”
“Yeah, I found this park a few years ago. They have different art installations throughout the year, and they’re all pretty cool. This one’s gotta be my favorite, though.” He motions toward the food vendors. “What do you want? Take your pick.” 
You walk slowly between the stands before finally making your selection. “Thanks, Kuroo.” You finally say, when you have your treat in hand and the two of you have begun to make your way down the footpath. 
“What kind of date would I be if I didn’t buy you anything to eat?” He brushes it off with a wave of his hand.
“No, I mean… for everything. For this.” You wave your hand at your surroundings. “It’s got to be one of the coolest dates I’ve ever been on.”
“One of?” He gives you a teasing grin. “I’ll work on that for next time.” That’s the moment he knocks his hand against yours again, more purposefully, and you recognize the invitation. You turn your hand palm up, and he slides your hands together, fitting his fingers between yours. He gives your hand a gentle squeeze, and you smile at him, hoping it can convey everything you can’t put into words.
You walk slowly through the park, taking everything in. You’re talking the whole time. About nothing - about everything. You don’t realize how much time has passed until the lights in the trees flicker out, leaving only the harsher white park lighting. “Guess that’s our cue to leave.” Kuroo chuckles.
The train is much emptier than it had been earlier that evening. Still, you sit close together. Kuroo puts his arm loosely around your shoulders, and you let yourself lean ever-so-slightly into him. He has the same smell you remember from his coat the night you’d met - something warm and comforting that you can’t quite place.
Back in front of your apartment building, it’s finally time to say your goodbyes. Kuroo finally lets go of your hand. You don’t say anything at first, trying to drag it out just a little longer.
“I had a great time tonight.” Kuroo is the one to speak. “Honestly. Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m really glad that guy didn’t show up for you last week. Is that insensitive?”
“Maybe.” You laugh. “But I know what you mean. Sure, it might’ve been more ideal if i met you when I was sober, but drunk me is sure glad you showed up when you did.” You pause, and the two of you simultaneously take a step closer together. You giggle softly.
“Don’t go to any more bars alone.” He scolds gently, a soft smile on his face.
You shake your head. “Wouldn’t dream of it.” 
When his face is only inches away from yours, he pauses. “Is this okay?”
You wrap your fingers into the fabric of his coat. “Perfect.” You breathe before tugging him close enough to cover the final distance between you. His kiss is warm and firm, and when you finally pull away, he follows after you for one final peck. He grins.
“Wanna go exploring with me next Saturday?”
You smile back, warmth slowly traveling through your whole body. “I’d love that.”
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hufflautia · 4 years ago
Note
hI this is a tOTALLY ANONYMOUS PERSON ASKING. and i am asking u to answer everything on here😌
lmajfniasnf yall i forced menna to send me this ask and i was kinda kidding but also a bit serious but also kinda kidding- ok anwyas here we go 
(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed? closed 
(2) Do You Have Freckles? no 
(3) Can You Whistle? yes
(4) Last Song You Listened To. “Needed Me” by Rihanna
(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour? grayish green
(6) Relationship Status. in love with loki<3! 
(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now? cold, my fingers are cold and menna knows this 
(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky? no i did not, quite the opposite actually! 
(9) How Many Followers? around 650 
(10) Zodiac Sign. taurus
(11) What Is Your Eye Colour? brown
(12) Take A Vitamin Daily? yea
(13) Do You Sing In The Shower? usually 
(14) What Books Are You Reading? no book bc i have no brain cells 
(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14. 
“i cannot imagine,” replied the scarecrow; “but we can go and see.” -the wonderful wizard of oz! i forgot i had that book, i got it from library for school last year but then quarantine hit and i couldn't return it bc the library closed 
(16) Favourite Anime? i barely watch anime, so i guess “Attack on Titans”, being that its one of the few animes I've watched
(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of? my math teacher 
(18) Do You Collect Anything? only the souls of the innocent. also chapstick. 
(19) What Did You Have For Lunch? wontons that fucked my stomach up bc the meat was not cooked properly :D don't we love that?????????????!!!!!!
(20) Do You Dance In The Car? not rlly 
(21) Favourite Animal? dog 
(22) Do You Watch The Olympics? no 
(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed? usually 11 or 12- depends on day
(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now? no 
(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean? pool 
(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog? clandestineloki
(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water? i don't care as long as its safe
(28) What Makes You Happy? my siblings, my best friends, loki, tom hiddleston
(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.
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i saw this and thought it was a good fit but then i realized it was too calm so
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(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music? without
(31) Dogs Or Cats? DOGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be? yellow 
(33) PlayStation Or Xbox. i don't care
(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean? I've never swam in a lake before, so lake
(35) Do You Believe In Magic? yea
(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing? gray
(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue? no 
(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It? depends
(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You? yes 
(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now? of course, loki will always be an obsession of mine bruh 
(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly? nO BC IM SCARED OF BUTTERFLIES 
(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People? yes:’( 
(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams? of course
(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes? yes 
(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry. ParaNorman
(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds? sunflower seeds
(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be? the neighbourhood
(48) Are You A Picky Eater? kinda 
(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper? eh 
(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning? kinda 
(51) Do You Like To Read / Write? yes 
(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud? depends on mood
(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents? wrap 
(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up? sleepy hallow ft foushee- deep end freestyle 
(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather) winter?? 
(56) What Are You Craving Right Now? l o k i (my original answer was warmth but its basically the same thing) 
(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed. 
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(58) What Is Your Gender? female
(59) Coffee Or Tea? tea
(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About? nope, i finished it on Friday and Saturday like a bad bitchhhhhhhhh
(61) What Is Your Sexuality? bisexual
(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning? depends on day 
(63) Favourite Pokemon? squirtle i guess
(64) Favourite Social Media? insta 
(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories? they're fine 
(66) Do You Get Homesick? kinda 
(67) Are You A Virgin? ill leave it up to ur imagination bitch (MENNA IM SO SORRY IM NOT CALLING U A BTICH IM JUST SAYING THAT IN GENERAL) 
(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now? i forgot the name, but its white and fancy and from the same brand 
(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm that is a very good question, probably the motel 
(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life? AHAH depends on what u mean by “still in my life”!!!!!!! i guess technically yes, but I've already cut off those bitches in my head 😌 manifesting it into existence <3 
(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters? avatar 2 
(72) Do You Miss Your Ex? i don't have one 
(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now? “not you, i didn't wanna hurt you”
(74)  What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest? brown bc if i say any other color, its probably a yt person and also brown be smexy
(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set? yes, yes 
(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate? honey buttered biscuits 
(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone? among us, maybe Minecraft 
(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not? no bc i don't know how and i would call for someone else to help 
(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?probably bc I'm a hermit
(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network? amsifnda this is ME ur talking to 
(81) Do You Like Meeting New People? yes kinda, unless they're awkward (aHEM BREAKOUT ROOMS WITH NEW BUT AWKWARD PEOPLE-) 
(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them. i used to but not anymore 
(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?  i want it closed but the person i share the room with leaves it open bc they say we’re gonna fuckin suffocate if we leave it closed and i hate it bc ✨trauma✨! DONT WE LOVE TRAUMA??!?!?!?!??!?!?!? :D............
(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today? i baked biscuits, i did college stuff, i showered
(85) What Do You Wear To Bed? usually mismatched pjs 
(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now. chapstick, natural skincare serum, lotion, face masks
(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person? day 
(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc. don't have any
(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.
a snake chased me and it was weird as fuck
(90) Favourite Soda Drink? don't have one 
(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite? people laughing, violin and piano, my friends voices, my siblings voices
(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More? SWEATS
(93) How Do You Look Right Now? comfy 
(94) Name Something That Relaxes You. showering
(95) What Tattoo Do You Want? maybe an important quote? “dont trust owls” imprinted on my face
(96) Favourite YouTuber? stephanie soooooooooooooooooooooo 
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carolmaximoffs · 5 years ago
Text
THE GOOD DOCTOR
CHAPTER FOUR
Ch. Summary: Thea gets a suspicious text from an unknown number. She risks sharing her secret with the team, in hopes of finding who’s behind them.
Warnings: stillbirth, vague depiction of childbirth, loss of a child, Agents of S. H. I. E. L. D. spoilers, cursing, probably some spelling errors
Pairings (bc I guess now is as good a time as ever to add this): Sam Wilson x WOC OFC
A/N: i’m on a roll and i don’t think it’s a good one...regardless, italics are a flashback (in the form of a dream). bold italics are texts, though that i hope is obvious... things get a little weird in this chapter but it’s bc i was watching OUAT and regina’s weird tomb w all those hearts is partially responsible. i’m sorry if this isn’t your jam right away but i promise this isn’t going to be a dark fic! this is probably about as creepy as it’ll get. again PLEASE read the warnings. 
Taglist (which is open!): @marvelousmrstark​
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    THE DOCTOR AND THE CAPTAIN dance around each other for a week following lunch. She still hangs out with Wanda, and sometimes Bucky and Sam, but Steve is always miraculously busy. When Thea wakes up early to train with Natasha, Steve is always conveniently just leaving the kitchen as she enters. It isn’t until a Saturday morning that it comes to a halt.
    Tony quite literally drags Steve by the ear into the med-bay, which Thea would find funny if she weren’t loath to see him. America’s golden boy, and she’d been the one to tick him off. She knew he was a cautious man, suspicious due to events in recent years, and even in his past; it didn’t stop her from feeling incredibly awkward after his seemingly blatant distrust of her.
    The dark-haired man releases his hold on Steve and crosses his arms. The tips of Steve’s ears are grow red as Thea looks up from the paperwork she’s been doing, in regards to Clint’s mission injury a few days ago.
    “Talk,” Tony says as sternly as possible.
    “Thea, it wasn’t my place to question you about your abilities,” Steve starts, and Tony gives him a thumbs up while nodding encouragingly. Thea resists the urge to roll her eyes. “I...you made it clear you were just here as a doctor, and if that’s all you want to be then I will respect that. Thank you again for...my leg. And while I do think-”
    “Alright, shows over, nice job, thanks Dory!” Tony hastily interjects, gripping Steve’s forearm and steering him out of the small office. Thea rises to her feet.
    “Wait,” She commands, and they stop, Tony’s shoulders sagging. “What do you think?”
    “I think,” Steve says, turning around and meeting her eyes, “That your powers could be a great asset to the team. Outside of medical situations.”
    Thea realizes what he’s getting at. It takes everything in her to remain calm, lifting her chin just a little.
    “Whether that’s true or not, I’m perfectly happy with what I’m doing. Thank you for the apology, Steve.” Her words come out stiff, a little sharper than she means them to. Nevertheless, Thea shakes Steve’s hand when he offers it, and maintains her rigid posture until she hears the main doors to the med-bay close.
    “I tried to warn him,” Tony offers, having shifted to lean against the doorway. Thea drops into her chair with a sigh, leaning her head back as she clicks a pen absently.
    “I just wish everybody would let it go. It’s not...it’s not cool, it’s not useful.” Thea sits up straight, tossing the pen aside and gripping her desk. “I mean, what would I do with my powers in a fight? Put somebody to sleep? Stop their heart? I’m not...I’m not a killer, Tony.”
    “I know you’re not,” He says softly, approaching her desk to pry her fingers off it. “I won’t tell you that I agree with him, you know I do, but I will tell you it is 100% your decision.”
    Thea manages a thank you, and, bless him, Tony leaves. She closes the folder on Clint’s mission after signing a few more pages and sets it into her main desk drawer. Peering as far as she could to be sure Tony was gone, she pulls a key from around her neck and unlocks a little side drawer.
    Inside, only two items lay. One is a picture of her and her brother, only a year after she’d been adopted. Fury had explained his choice of family as ‘somewhere Thea could blend in, feel comfortable’, and it was perfect. The Triplett’s adopted her within 6 months of fostering her; she was home. In the photo, Antoine stands much taller than she, with an arm around her shoulders and the other wiggling into her abdomen. She, as a result of his tickling, is frozen in time laughing openly.
    Thea sets the photo aside and reaches back into the drawer for the other object. It’s a locket, one Antoine had given her. Though the chain is thin, the charm attached is sizable for a necklace. It vibrates with energy that might make Thea nervous if she wasn’t so intimately familiar with it. The click of the lock coming undone still sends chills down her spine, regardless.
    Within it, shrouded in the gold of Thea’s magic, beats a tiny human heart.
                                                                -
     That night, dinner is a lonely affair. Steve had left for a mission shortly after seeing Thea, Natasha and Sam with him. Bucky and Wanda had invited her to join them for supper, but Thea feigned having work to do; Tony had gone on a date with Pepper. Now, as the stove clock blinks 9:30, Thea settles at the breakfast bar with a bowl of leftover dumplings.
    She eats in silence, only disrupted when behind her, the TV clicks on. A glance over her shoulder shows her Bucky, flipping channels despite the book open on his lap. He doesn’t acknowledge her, however, so Thea returns to her meal, until her phone pings in her back pocket.
UNKNOWN NUMBER
    Thea frowns at the device, but opens the message anyways.
UNKNOWN NUMBER
Funny how the good doctor avoids her powers
with friends, but not with family.
    Thea’s heart begins to pound. Not only had she made sure she was alone earlier, and every time she went into her drawer, but the key is always with her. Any assistants Tony hired had never even been through the office - it was really only for paperwork, anyways, and they always left it on the desk for Thea to go through later. She feels nauseous, suddenly: the only other person on Earth who knew about the locket, and it’s true nature, was dead.
    “You alright, Doc?” Comes a voice, and Thea jumps. She swallows as Bucky eyes her curiously, slipping her phone back into her pocket and nodding.
    “Yeah, I...yes. I’m good,” Thea replies, but her voice quivers just enough that Bucky grips her arm as she moves past him to put her bowl in the sink.
    “Thea-” He tries, but Thea pulls her arm away, giving him a tight, apologetic smile.
    “Bucky, I’m fine. Seriously.” Thea insists before she ducks out of the kitchen. She can’t shake the feeling of his gaze, half pity and half suspicion, even as she shuts her bedroom door. After a moment of thought, she locks it, for good measure, and closes every curtain. No chances taken. She showers and changes from scrubs to sweats, and as she settles into her pillows she pulls out her phone again.
     But not with family.
     Thea still feels nauseous, and without even thinking, she types out a response.
                                                                                                           Who is this?
    There’s no immediate answer. Thea groans as she shuts her light off and tosses the phone aside. She tosses and turns until finally falling into nightmares.
                                                                     -
    2014
    Thea laughs as Antoine crouches to coo over her quickly growing stomach. One month from her due date, but her brother has been devoted to her child from the moment Thea found out she was pregnant. She hadn’t even thought she could have children, nor had she really thought about them with the insane hours she worked, but she too was excited.
    “Hi little bugger,” He whispers. Thea scolds him for language, but he ignores her. “I’m your Uncle Trip. We’re gonna be best friends, ‘cause your mama’s gotta be strict.”
    Thea flicks his forehead, and he only smiles up at her before rising to his feet.
    “I’m sorry,” He starts, and Thea collapses dramatically back into her couch. “About Ward. If we had- if I had known, Dot, you know-”
    “Ant, it’s fine. Not your fault at all,” Thea tries to reason with him, but since learning of Grant’s true nature, she’d been struggling as well. Her long-time boyfriend had seemed so...so wonderful. Though Thea tried not to think about how he had seemed, tried not to think about him at all; it just spiraled until she was left wondering how much of it was lies.
    Suddenly, she cries out, and Antoine rushes to her as she doubles over. His voice floats in and out of focus, the pain consuming her.
    “Dot? Hey, Dot, what’s up? Dor…”
     Thea feels only as if she blinks, and when she opens her eyes, she’s in a hospital bed. She’s hooked to various machines, and the room itself is crowded with people. Sound is still distorted, but Antoine is right by her side, gripping her hand. It’s a small relief.
    “It’s too soon,” Thea protests as an unfamiliar woman crouched by her feet  tells her to push. She doesn’t notice that she can only hear one heart monitor beeping. “Please, it’s too soon-”
    With further insistence, Thea pushes anyways, the promise of ending the pain too tempting. A scream tears from her throat. It feels like only minutes before she feels all pressure lift; she'd done it. Yet the cry she expects does not come. She fees . Thea holds onto her brother’s hand for dear life.
    “Ant? What’s happening? What’s wrong?” She whimpers, but Antoine is asking the doctors the same questions. Finally, they file out slowly, until only one doctor remains, a nurse standing just behind her, almost out of sight.
    “Ms. Triplett, we are so sorry. Your son...was stillborn. You can...you can still hold him if you’d like.”
    Thea’s body is wracked with sobs, but she holds her hands out regardless. The nurse places her unmoving child, swaddled with his eyes closed, into her arms. Antoine wraps an arm around her shoulders as Thea lets go of his hand to hold her son’s. The doctor mentions something about giving her time, and she and the nurse file out.
    “He’s perfect,” Thea whispers. She stares down at where her dark fingers encase his tiny tan hand, and her crying ceases. A deep determination settles into her bones. “I want to keep him.”
    “Thea.” Antoine gasps, alarmed, but she looks up at him with pleading eyes.
     “Please. Please, Ant, you know I would never ask you anything like this but I-he’s my son.”
    And as Antoine takes up a stray scalpel, Thea’s heart shatters all over again.
                                                                   -
    Thea jerks into a sitting position, gasping for breath. Her hands scramble for the key, feeling it still secure around her neck. Without thinking, she slides her feet into slippers and races from her room. She’s almost to the elevator when someone calls her name.
    “Thea?”
    It’s Sam, voice raspy from sleep. He’s still in his tactical suit, though without wings and goggles, evidently having been so wiped out he hadn’t changed. They must’ve just gotten back, then.
    “Sam,” she replies breathlessly. Thea struggles to tamp down the panic trying to eat her alive as he emerges fully from his bedroom, making his way to her. “I thought you had a mission.”
    “Just an in and out thing,” He replies, rubbing his eyes. “Are you alright? It’s 2:30.”
    “Oh, yeah, I’m great,” Thea lies, forcing a small laugh. Sam doesn’t look like he believes her, but she presses on. “Just heading to the kitchen, glass of water, you know.”
    “Then I’ll join you,” Sam says, taking another step towards her, and Thea’s heart feels ready to burst from her chest.
    “No!” Sam looks taken aback. His usually laid-back demeanor is uneasy. Thea gulps, fingers coming back up to twist into the chain of her necklace. “I mean, no, thank you. I also left something, um, downstairs, in my, my office so really, you should go back to bed. Need some rest.”
    She forces a laugh, but Sam only sighs, running a hand over his face. “Show me.”
    Thea swallows the bile rising in her throat and tries to steady her breathing as he follows her to the elevator. No more words are spoken as they walk down the hallway past the garage, Tony’s lab, and enter the medbay. Thea takes the key from around her neck as they enter the tiny back office. He crosses his arms expectantly as she unlocks the drawer.
    The locket nearly slips from her trembling hands, so Sam takes it instead, and Thea can’t find it in her to protest. He opens it, and closes it almost right after, staring at Thea with wide eyes.
     “What...the fuck?” Sam whispers, and Thea feels her eyes burn with tears. “Is…is that-”
    He struggles to get the words out, and Thea lets the first tears roll as she nods. Sam silently sets the locket back in the drawer and shuts it. “Who?”
    Thea takes a deep, shaky breath. An understanding seems to have grown between them, though Thea isn’t sure she wants him to voice it out loud. She squeezes her eyes shut to try to block out the semi-horrified look on his face.
    “It’s my son’s.”
                                                              -
    Thea swears Sam to secrecy, but he only agrees on the condition that she’ll tell the team as soon as she can.They return to their separate rooms, Thea with the locket clasped securely about her neck. Sure she won’t be able to sleep, not now, not when someone...two someones now know her secret. She opts instead to perch in the bay window of her bedroom, staring out over the city. Thea loses exact track of time as she immerses herself in thoughts, and the sun shines high above the city when FRIDAY’s voice reaches her ears.
    “Dr. Triplett, Boss wishes you’d join the team in the living room, please.” 
    Thea, habitually, tightens her fingers around the key, and now the locket as well. Quickly, she changes from her sleep shirt into a pullover and jeans, opting to head downstairs barefoot. As FRIDAY had said, the entire team is already spread out across the living room. Tony rises to his feet to guide Thea to sit next to him before clearing his throat.
   “Birdbrain said you had something to tell us, but I knew if you’d kept something from me it must be serious,” Tony explains, and Thea finds herself nodding. “Didn’t want to uh, make you feel under any more pressure with a conference room.” 
    Thea nods, hesitating. She takes the beat of silence to look over everyone, feeling almost as if it was the day she’d arrived. Wanda is curled up to Vision, Natasha and Steve taking up the rest of Tony and Thea’s couch. Steve’s sat forward, elbows rested on his knees, already intently listening. Bucky lingers in the kitchen doorway. Rhodey and Sam, too, are on their feet, and when she meets his eyes, Sam gives her an encouraging nod. The surgeon is unable to voice the truth, not without any leeway. She unhooks the locket from her neck and opens it.
    The moment Thea does this, gasps and murmurs flood the room. After just a few seconds, once she was sure everyone had seen it’s contents, she closes the locket and gently sets it into her lap. Tony is floundering beside her, but Thea speaks first. 
    “That is my son’s heart,” She croaks, a little surprised at the brokenness of her voice. She finds herself meeting Sam’s eyes as she speaks, as she hadn’t even explained it to him last night. 
   “He was stillborn and...I didn’t handle it very well.” Thea continues. She thinks Rhodey mutters an ‘obviously’, but he’s quickly shushed. A sob builds in her throat as she talks, but she fights it. “My brother was there...he um, he had some medical training as well, he...he took out the heart for me, and I healed my son’s body so they wouldn’t suspect anything. He’d never had a heartbeat to begin with s-so nobody said anything. His body was cremated. A year later, my brother died. He was the only person who knew about...about Philip’s heart.” 
   To Thea’s shock, Natasha reaches out to grab her hand. With her free hand, Thea swipes at stray tears. When Thea looks over at the other woman, Natasha is watching her with a knowing expression. Vision’s voice cracks the moment in two. 
    “Pardon me but...where was the father?” He asks hesitantly, and Thea laughs bitterly, to their shock. 
   “Out of the picture. He was a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent I met through my brother but...” Thea shakes her head, reminiscing. “He turned out to be undercover Hydra. Said he only knew me for me but, he read files on me long before he even joined S.H.I.E.L.D.”
    Natasha is nodding in Thea’s peripheral, and Thea recalls in the back of her mind that Nat had worked for S.H.I.E.L.D. in the past. She must have at least some inkling of what Thea was on about. The younger woman pulls her hand back into her lap gently, to wrap both of them around the locket.
    “It doesn’t matter now. He’s dead and irrelevant. But last night, I got a text from an unknown number,” Thea reveals. “It was only one thing but it...it really shook me because yesterday I had looked at Philip’s heart. And then I get that message...‘Funny how the good doctor avoids her powers with friends, but not with family.’” 
   “And your brother was the only person who knew, but he’s...passed on as well, right?” Steve interjects, and Thea nods. “How did Sam find out?” 
    Thea fights a smile. Part of her felt...relief. She hadn’t talked about this with anyone before, and never planned to. Even if the team was finding out now, she was glad to have been able to trust Sam first. She takes a deep, slightly shaky breath before going on. 
   “I had a dream, last night. Or a nightmare, really. I...remembered the day Philip was born. Or, not born, I guess. I don’t know. But the dream and the messages, I was so shaken up and I went to go check on the locket. The key to the drawer it was in is always...” Thea untucks the key around her neck, “but I was so paranoid...Sam caught up with me in the hallway. Had me take him down to show him. I just...I guess I knew it was time to tell someone.” 
    All at once, Thea’s exhaustion hits her. It’s clear to the other’s that she’s finished sharing. Steve, ever the leader, nods sympathetically and reaches over to pat Thea’s shoulder as he stands. 
   “Well, you did the right thing,” He states, and the sentiment is followed with murmurs of agreement from the team. “Especially with this...unknown person messaging you.”  
    “He’s right, DT,” Tony says, speaking for the first time since Thea had sat down. He’s risen to his feet as well, already rubbing his hands together. “In fact, give me your phone. I’ll see if I can’t figure out who’s behind this.” 
    Thea agrees, though she left her phone in her bedroom, and Tony tells her not to worry. After Thea promises to bring it down to the lab ASAP, the group disperses. Nat pulls her aside with a surprisingly kind smile as she makes towards the elevator. 
    “Philip for Coulson, right?” The redhead inquires. Thea smiles back, a little embarrassed, but she nods. 
   “He was one of the one’s who rescued me as a kid,” Thea elaborates as she presses the button for the residential floor. Nat nods, but she’s suddenly bumped by Sam as he slips into the elevator with Thea. 
    “Sorry, Nat!” He calls out as the doors close. The man spares the buttons a quick once over, but evidently they’re going to the same place. Sam settles in beside Thea without pushing a single one’ she tries to ignore the fact that he’s comfortable enough to stand so close their elbows brush, despite all he’s learned of her. They exit the lift together, not engaging in conversation, but he walks her all the way to her door near the end. Right as she goes to enter, he coughs. Thea turns back to him with a raised brow.
   “I know that couldn’t have been easy for you,” Sam tells her. It’s a redundant statement, but the soft quality to his voice prevents Thea from being annoyed. “Steve was right though, because we can...you know, we can help you now.” 
    Thea bites back a scoff as she pushes open her door and walks inside. True to her instinct, Sam follows. 
    “I mean with the texts, of course. ‘Cause that’s some creepy shit,” He hastily amends. “Although...I do know a little about PTSD.” 
    This has Thea stopping in her tracks. She turns around, arms crossed, to meet his eyes again. Sam’s face wears a strange look she can’t read, but she raises a brow as nonverbal permission to go on. 
   “If you ever...wanted to talk to anyone. Not like, a shrink. Like a...a friend.” He’s nervous, Thea realizes, as he scrubs a hand over the back of his neck and shifts his weight. Despite the tightness gripping her heart, Thea gives him her most appreciative and reassuring smile. 
   “Thanks, Sam,” She says. He nods, more to himself than anything, and turns to leave as Thea turns back to her dresser. As she picks up her phone, she gasps. “Sam?!” 
   His footsteps almost echo as a new bout of queasiness washes over Thea. She doesn’t hear what he says as she stares at the screen, barely registering him so close to her as he takes a look. 
UNKNOWN NUMBER You know who it is. Return to
the place it all began, for it
is the place that all ends. 
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123abcdrawwithme · 5 years ago
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all spg albums poorly described by me bc i can
album one: steam man band: michael reed voice: GUYS HOLY HECK LOOKIT MY ROBOT FRIEMDS THEIR SO COOL OHMA G AD clockwork vaudeville: now when you say you bought yourself a pickle- sound of tomorrow: the jons audible lenny face as he says “in the nude” on top of the universe 2009 ver.: RABBIT FUCKED A TOASTER AND UPGRADE KILLED THE SPINE THE GIRLS ARE OFF THE SHITS on top of the universe 2011 ver.: alternate timeline where the jon and rabbit kill the spine and deny him ice cream i am not alone: poor one out for upgrades 1 (one) song, shes trying her best ice cream parade: i don’t even know where to begin with this one brass goggles: LOCAL ROBOS ARE FEELING EMO SO THEY HAVE A SING ALONG out in the rain: splish splash they was havin’ a bash electricity is in my soul: okay but whomst the hell is that electronic voice who sings the “la la’s”? serious question who tf is it???? steam man band reprise: michael reed voice: GUYS MY COOL ROBO FRIENDS ARE GETTING AN ENCORE HOLY HECKIE blind minstrel’s ballad: ominous captain albert alexander: listen,,,, he beat spider hulk in an arm wrestling match,,,, hes really cool,,,,,, the 2¢ show: steamboat shenanigans: some say they sang so hard they really did make it to the moon and across the stars ;) one-way ticket: CHU CHU I LOVE U ju ju magic: jonathan giraffe what tHE FUCK ARE YOU SINGING ABOUT HONEY? ARE YOU OKAY? me and my baby (saturday night): the spines a hopeless romantic and he loves to treat his girl and his siblings support him little birdie: jon makes friends with a bird or some shit idfk rex marksley: the spines a hopeless romantic and sings about his cowboy crush and his siblings support him automatonic electronic harmonics: they want to feel cool,, let them feel cool,, prelude to a dream: hey michael i thought you were supposed to be the human friend whats all this about not being a human being?? mike? m-mike?? make believe: FUCK SOCIETY, TRANS RIGHTS BITCHES *EPIC KAZOO SOLO* honeybee: ah yes that one song we won’t ever let them forget bc were all emo scary world: the morse code says spoopy the suspender man: rabbit voice: yeah theres this guys who sold his soul or whatever how fucked up was that, anyway i want to wear a dress :3c that’ll be the way home: THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL the ballad of lily: oh boi we about to have another character song on this album airheart: character song 2 electric boogaloo circuitry: y’all good? mk iii: curtain raiser: beebop voice: STEVETHY SOMEONES TRYING TO PLAY THE ALBUM   steve voice: oh fuck steam powered giraffe: HEHE NAME DROP mecto amore: this is some rabbits in love again shit but with WHAMST hatch fever: hatchy is here and the album version does not capture how feral hatchworth performed this on stage a way into your heart: spg as a whole @ their fans: we love you all so much thank you for the support over the years :) <3 me through tears: bitch,,,,, <3 ghost grinder: rabbit and the boys on their way to the graveyard at 3 am to party with rabbits dead gf please explain: i stg everytime i hear hatchy sing “gum in my gears” i think he’s saying something else and i’m sure you can fill in the blank, but the thing that gets me is thats so on brand for him to say dsfdfg she said maybe: rabbit is just young old dumb and full of love these days isn’t she? go spine go: almost 6 minutes of hatchworth and rabbit being two year olds and poking fun at spine roller skate king: everyone sleeps on how good this song is wtf i’ll rust with you: me knowing full well this song is about rabbit outliving her gfs throughout the decades bc shes a robot: oh,, so thats why theres so many love songs by rabbit on this album,,, rabbit you good?? wired wrong: the spine you good?? fancy shoes: hATCHWORTH YOU GOOD??? steam powered giraffe reprise: we interrupt your regularly scheduled robot angst hours with that good weeb shit™ turn back the clock: okay back the robot angst bleak horizon: our lovelys saying goodbye saying they’ll be back to bring smiles on our faces soon as we close out to some ominous as fuck shit teasing vice quadrant the vice quadrant: the vice does tight: okay so the vice quadrants fucked up and the robots are very concerned by this on a crescendo: ominous foreshadowing thats so ominous i had to look up what this song meant lore wise bc i just thought it was the robots just dancing and having fun steamjunk: my dear sweet honey darling is traveling through space and I’M WORRIED ABOUT HIM starburner: low-key robo angst bc their worried about their souls being damned or some shit but its cute  progress and technology: david YOUR RANGE wink the satellite: wink voice: YOU WAS MY BABY MY FUCKIN CINNAMON APPLE burning in the stratosphere: oh fire fire: this is the most haunting shit i have no joke for this sky sharks: hoo boi the sky sharks certainly won’t be killing us all today, but climate change sure will daughter of space: PREBBY SPACE GODDESS HNNNGNNGNG star valley night: honeys you know you can just wait for it to be night time right? then you can go play in the star valley at night- commander cosmo: BITCH YOU GOOD? where is everyone?: THERE SHE IS MY BABY gg the giraffe: MY DARLIIIIINNGGG SING IT HONEY  the pulls: wink my darling y’all ok? soliton: corpse man and space goddess sing a really nerdy analogy about love and its gorgeous where i left you: wink seriously are you okay? over the moon: rabbits just done but shes gotta sing it and go all out with how done she is bc shes extra it’s cosmic: is the “alright!” rav?? also is this love song supposed to represent them causing more fuckshit and destroying the universe and just not realizing it bc their in love?? idfk man it bops hold me: whether from the perspective of holly or rabbit i weep openly at this song the speed of light: david: this is where the astronaut turns evil won’t tell you why tho ;) literally every lore buff: *listens to this song and tries to theorize wtf happened* rav to the rescue: local green space twink rescues his space bf more at 11 starlight starshine: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO the space giant: three steampunk robots fight a giant starbaby in guitar hero to save a satellites crush; a planet thats a huge apple i have zero jokes for this is already too absurd  oh no: oh OH OH? O H. OOOH OH??????????? o  h... oh no.... necrostar: evil pissrock possessed evil dead guy and is ready to cause fuckshit while the robots sing about how scared they are at the end super space blaster centi-asteroid invaderpedes 2: cute interactions with the robots! i hate this title tho whale song: wholesome shit to distract you from all the lore and foreshadowing at the end Music from steamworld heist:  automatonic electronic harmonics, on top of the universe, electricity is is my soul, honeybee, and brass goggles: me minding my own business playing steamworld heist: *walks into a bar where spine rabbit and hatchworth are performing one of these songs* me: HOOOOOGH heist ho!: yeah thats piper for ya starscrap: hi i’m in love for rabbit? prepare for boarding: GET IN BITCHES WE’RE GONNA OVER THROW THE PATRIARCHY  the red queen: capitalism? demolished. what we need are some heros: the spine projecting his love for cowboys onto the player characters the vast frontier: hatchworth: I’M A BAD BITCH YOU CAN’T KILL ME the stars: they made it lads they made it over the moon and across the stars.... also how’d they keep singing for that long aren’t they tired? quintessential: malfunction: wow i can’t believe spg ended transphobia i don’t have a name for it: love? i guess??gd fgdsghfdg blue portals: the idea of hatchworth going through the blue portals when i know they’re made out of blue matter is terrifying  overdrive: they want to seem cool please play along and pretend their green screen work is cool the ballad of delilah morreo: this came right the fuck out of nowhere but fuck its here now and its fantastic love world of love: wonder what other balboa park songs they’ll bring back, like never gonna give you up :) only human: i’d die for you hatchy salgexicon: they deadass wrote a song about their dnd campaign  sleep evil sleep: i guess we’re all evil BC WE KEEPING SLEEPING ON HOW GOOD THIS SONG IS TOO photographic memories: walter worker chelsea? come get ur mans- leopold expeditus: hatchworth: hey guys checkout my fursona dream machine: this song keeps me up at night with the endING I JUST WANT RABBIT TO BE HAPPY AND ARTSY BUT THE WAY IT ENDED WITH THE VICE QUADRANT RELATED TEASER MAKES ME THINK RABBIT PICKED UP A SATELLITE FREQUENCY FROM WINK ABOUT HOW NECROSTAR WILL KILL RAV IN THE FUTURE DEADASS I’M NERVOUS WHAT HAPPENED
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neeksknocks · 5 years ago
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50 questions you’ve never been asked
tagged by @bakuqou , tysm for the tag!!
1. What is the color of your hairbrush?:  navy blue
2. Name a food you never eat?:  uhh i’m not a super picky eater but i don’t think i’ve like, ever had asparagus 
3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?:  too warm, i get hot way too easily
4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?:  trying to brainstorm for writing stuff but mostly staring at the wall
5. What is your favorite candy bar?:  anything that’s like cookies & creme that shit slaps
6. Have you ever been to a professional sports event?:  nope lmao
7. What is the last thing you said out loud?:  “wash your fucking hands” to my brother (love u tal)
8. What is your favorite ice cream?:  hmm probably cookies & creme
9. What was the last thing you had to drink?:  water
10. Do you like your wallet?:  i guess? idk i wish it had a pocket for change though
11. What was the last thing you ate?:  soup
12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?:  nope
13. The last sporting event you watched?:  my friend’s soccer game in freshman year of high school
14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?:  there are different flavors???
15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to?:  “you deserve it” which sounds vaguely menacing lol but it was because my dad’s girlfriend was telling me about how she was talking a break during work
16. Ever go camping?:  yep! not in way too long tho i miss it
17. Do you take vitamins?:  not in years but i should
18. Do you go to church every Sunday?:  nope lmao
19. Do you have a tan?:  kinda?? idk i’ve been going on a lot of walks so i’ve kinda gotten one but im still very pale
20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?:  both are very yummy 
21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?: i don’t really drink soda anymore but when i did i would in like restaurants 
22. What color socks do you usually wear?:  usually black or grey
23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit?:  i can’t drive  😔✊
24. What terrifies you?:  not 2 get too deep but i’m very afraid of being misunderstood/lied about for things of my control. also not a fan of flies. why? i have no idea
25. Look to your left, what do you see?:  my retainer 
26. What chore do you hate?:  dusting
27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?: i always confuse australian and british accents they sound the same
28. What’s your favorite soda?:  again don’t drink a lot of soda anymore but when i did rootbeer was my shit
29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thrus?:  usually when i go out to eat it’s with friends so usually we go in
30. Who’s the last person you talked to?:  in person my brother, over the phone my partner
31. Favorite cut of beef?:  i don’t. know what this means
32. Last song you listened to?:  rehab by people planet bc im listening to my theo decker playlist  😔✊
33. Last book you read?:  the goldfinch by donna tartt back in september (i’ve been looking at the humans by matt haig for like 3 months now but i haven’t. read it)
34. Favorite day of the week?:  i don’t really have one anymore but it was saturday when i was in high school
35. Can you say the alphabet backwards?:  i can get as far as y and then you’ve lost me
36. How do you like your coffee?:  i don’t drink coffee really but when i have had it i like it with oatmilk or coconut milk
37. Favorite pair of shoes?:  my favorites are these black platforms that give me like 5 extra inches, but the shoes i wear most often are my black converse but they have holes in the bototm now 😔✊
38. The time you normally go to sleep?:  i’m not working rn bc of quarantine bs that happened with my old job so rn like 3 AM but i used to go to bed at like 9 when i would have opening shifts 
39. The time you normally get up?:  used to get up at like 3 or 4 AM usually but recently like. 10 or 11
40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets?:  like them both but i feel like sunsets are usually prettier?
41. How many blankets on your bed?:  anywhere between 1-3
42. Describe your kitchen plates:  black 
43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?:  i don’t have a favorite bc i think alcohol is gross but when i drink it’s usually just straight up vodka
44. Do you play cards?:  not really
45. What color is your car?:  i don’t have one
46. Can you change a tire?:  i was a theatre kid in high school what do you think
47. Your favorite province?:  no clue
48. Favorite job you’ve ever had?:  uhh my last job ig (i worked at jamba juice) it was really good for my mental health for the few months bc it kept me busy but it started to be really bad for my mental health last few months 
49. How did you get your biggest scar?:  most of my scars are close in size but my three biggest are one on my inner forearm because uhhhhhh but it’s pretty faded, one on my right hand from burning myself on the oven at jamba but it’s also pretty faded, and one on the top of my right foot (that is Also pretty faded) from the floor of my ex boyfriend’s pool (it was new and sharp somehow)
50. What did you do today that made someone else happy?: i gave my friend some advice on something that was bothering her i tag!: @deadnamed @the-moldiest-of-doodles @medicatedpiss @pavlikovskie and anyone who wants to do it !
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mbeju · 5 years ago
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50 Questions You’ve Never Been Asked
I was tagged by @shikitsune  Thank youuuu ^^ <3
1. What is the color of your hairbrush?: Purple
2. Name a food you never eat?: Mondongo, it looks BAD
3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?: Idk, my hands tend to be extremely cold in winter but I feel okay and when it's 35C I still feel okay too
4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?: Watching a gameplay on youtube
5. What is your favorite candy bar?: I don't really eat candy bars
6. Have you ever been to a professional sports event?: I think I have but I'm not sure
7. What is the last thing you said out loud?: “Things like activating sheika towers without touching the ground!" To my little brother 😂
8. What is your favorite ice cream?: Dulce de Leche!
9. What was the last thing you had to drink?: pomelo juice (i forgot pomelo in english sorry)
10. Do you like your wallet?: Yee, it's adventure time themed
11. What was the last thing you ate?: instant ramen
12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?: Noou
13. The last sporting event you watched?: A repetition of a football match on tv
14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?: bacon
15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to?: my boyfriend
16. Ever go camping?: With my school and on my backyard haha
17. Do you take vitamins?: noo
18. Do you go to church every Sunday?: no.. haha (I should but I dont)
19. Do you have a tan?: No I'm paler than a ghost
20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?: Pizza!!!
21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?: not really
22. What color socks do you usually wear?: most of them have black in some way so black
23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit?: Yeah.. there's this road to get to the other side of the city where the speed limit is 50 km/h, I usually go at 60 km/h on the slow lane so I dont bother anyone (bc everyone goes at 90km/h since the road is outside the city) speed limits dont exist here.. tbh
24. What terrifies you?: lots of things that have to do with people not liking me/hating me
25. Look to your left, what do you see?: face cream
26. What chore do you hate?: doing the dishes
27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?: idk if it's only the youtubers I watch but I don't notice it. I just end up finding they are Australians when they mention it
28. What’s your favorite soda?: Coca cola, Pulp is a close second.
29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thrus?: I tend to hit the drive thru to go eat at my house
30. Who’s the last person you talked to?: My brother
31. Favorite cut of beef?: Idk my dad is the expert I just eat something that doesnt have bones
32. Last song you listened to?: The tittle is in japanese but it is a vocaloid song by Peg, using kagamine rin
33. Last book you read?: I'm reading Marianela by Benito Perez
34. Favorite day of the week?: Friday bc I can truly relax at night knowing I still have saturday and sunday to do my work
35. Can you say the alphabet backwards?: I think I can
36. How do you like your coffee?: Sweet, with milk, sometimes with chocolate, caramel or condensed milk
37. Favorite pair of shoes?: White tennis
38. The time you normally go to sleep?: 2 am
39. The time you normally get up?: 7:30 am
40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets?: It depends
41. How many blankets on your bed?: Two bc it's starting to get cold
42. Describe your kitchen plates: White, all white
43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?: I don't really drink but I like strawberry daiquiri and any juice with alcohol I guess, mostly the juice haha
44. Do you play cards?: if UNO counts, yes
45. What color is your car?: Silver gray
46. Can you change a tire?: I think I can but I never had to, there's always someone with me that helps when it happens
47. Your favorite province?: Umm idk (we don't use provinces here we use "Departments" haha I guess Central, where I live)
48. Favorite job you’ve ever had?: designing all the posters and other stuff for a international student engineering thing hehe
49. How did you get your biggest scar?: It's not that big, I was in 8th grade at my school's San Juan party and I was chasing my friend, I forgot there were some steps and I ran until the floor ended so I kind of flew? Hahaha. I fell and hit my arm against this concrete thing that attaches a bench to the floor and it hurt. I could move my arm but it was painful. The part were my skin came in contact with the floor and the concrete thing is where I have the scar but it's barely noticeable bc it's almost the same color as my skin.
50. What did you do today that made someone else happy?: I told my bf I loved him hehe
I tag: @strawberry-scum @armintie @beananium @radmaximilian No pressure to do it ^ ^)b
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seungmin-wrecked · 5 years ago
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Literally no one cares but here's my worst travel story:
So I go to a school 2-3 states away. Which according to Google, the college is a 9 hour drive, however, bc my family can't just drive 18 hours in one day to come get me and drive home, I normally take a train that goes across states. This train ride is about 6/6 and a half hours long. Not to mention :) the time you can buy tickets for this train at midnight and 3 am depending on which station you're leaving from (so if I'm heading back home, the train leaves at midnight. If I'm heading back to campus, the train leaves at 3 am). Keep this in mind :)
So the drive to the train station is a long one. It's about 4/4.5 hours long of a drive since the train station is in another state than the one I live in. So my dad decided to book a hotel like 15 min away from the train station, but not in the same city as the train station since prices were cheaper that way. We left the day before my train was supposed to leave so March 7th. We left our house at like 1 pm, and I had slept till 11 am since I had stayed up a bit late the night before. I slept in the car on the way to the hotel and was feeling pretty good!
We decided to waste some time looking around the town we were in, ate dinner at 3 pm, and actually had to go hunting to go find a place to print my train ticket since I had forgotten to (we eventually found a Staples 3 towns over and an abandoned mall that had bad vibes from the outside). Time passes and we head back to the hotel about 7 pm, but there's still a bunch of time before my train left. My boarding time that day was 4 am since daylight savings time was ending so we were supposed to jump forward, so it was really like my train was still arriving at 3 am. Amtrak suggests getting to the train station at least an hour before your train is supposed to arrive, so my dad and I agreed to leave the hotel at like 1:15 am. My dad fell asleep, but I was still pretty awake since I had gotten so much sleep already so I decided to read Manga on my phone until it was time for us to leave. We left the hotel on time, arrived at the train station early and thank goodness it was pretty empty. I managed to sit by myself and the train ride was relatively nice! Like it usually is.
Now here came the issue. The city I was arriving in, I knew about three people who lived there. One person I couldn't ask a ride from, another one I could have but there were already issues there, and so I asked the third person I knew there first. She was able to come get me!
.... Once she got off work!
...... At 1 pm.
Now I'm still very thankful she agreed to come get me, and I always will be. I have no idea how else I was supposed to make it to campus without her help, even though I would only be on campus for two weeks before getting kicked off.
However, my train arrived at 9 am. I had barely any money in my bank account and I had too much anxiety after sitting at the train station to get up and go get something from the vending machines, not to mention, I had no small bills on me. It was nearing 24 hours without substantial food, what I had eaten were some gummies my friend had gotten me for my birthday on the train, and that's it. It also came to my realization that while I was sitting there in the train station my p****d had started. There was no one in the station until about 11, since there was another train coming.
This lady approached me when there were like 5 other people at the train station (4 of them were Amish) and she asked me if she could borrow my phone to contact someone because she had left her phone in the Lyft she took to get to the train station. I figured why not and opened the app on my phone to dial phone numbers. This lady messes with my phone a bit and then hands it back to me with a new tab open with Lyft's customer service page open. I figured she was going to call her phone! Nope!!!! Now remember that I was reading Manga in the hotel room? Well I still had the tab up, and I can assure you that it was the one she opened the chrome browser up to. You'll never guess what fucking Manga I happened to be reading :)))) it was fucking Sekaii Wa (I can't remember the rest rn) but it's that one explicit bl Manga, and I remember being at a part where one of the character's may or may not have been naked :)) so I was fully screaming internally at this point. This lady had seen bl p*** on my phone and had given NO REACTIONS. She had to come ask to use my phone a couple of times bc she was trying to figure out what to do and at one point she just. Walked away with my phone.
After that had happened, a girl who looked very nervous came over and sat next to me, and asked me about how the train works since it was her first time. I also had to pee very badly at this moment too; I had needed to pee since I got off the train but was too nervous to get up and just go to the bathroom, not to mention I didn't have anyone to watch my stuff. I answered her questions and then asked her to watch my stuff. At this point I could create a temporary solution to the monthly problem happening and continue on feeling better about that situation since all of my pads/tampons were in my suitcase.
At this point it was 1 pm. For those keeping track, that is the time that my friend said she was going to be in work till, and a total of 22 hours since I had last eaten anything substantial. I was on my monthly, starving, sleep deprived, because also at this point I had gotten barely two hours of sleep on the train, which means about two hours of sleep in total for 22 hours also, and now irritated. I eventually get a text from my friend letting me know that she just got off work and was going to head home to shower and then come get me. I was just happy to know she was close to getting me.
3 pm rolls around. She arrives. I am tired, starved, irritated, in pain, and now surprised since my friend was NOT the only one to come get me. Oh no. Her mother had driven her and her sister to come get me. Which her family is lovely, they're so nice and really helped me out right before Christmas break when I needed to stay somewhere in the city before going to the train station at midnight. They pick me up, all is good. I'm still super hungry.
I am mildly lactose intolerant and when I am on my monthly, coffee messes me up (this is important for this next part).
Her mom turns towards me and goes "we're headed to Starbucks, would you like something?" my immediate response? Yes. Absolutely. My brain that is reminding me of the already horrid situation I am in, and telling me not to get coffee won though and told her no. I thought we were going to leave immediately after we came back to my friend's house. But oh no. She had laundry to finish, a resume to finish, and her mom wanted to take her to the grocery store to pick up stuff for her room. I went with for everything and ended up buying the oddest assortment of things (including almond milk, mandarin oranges, and canned soup).
My friend finished everything at about 6:30 pm and we were good to leave. I am so hungry at this point. Her mother had given me a slice of banana bread she had just baked and I had to refuse anymore bc I knew I would have eaten the whole thing given the chance. That was the most food I had eaten since 3 pm the day before. For those, once again keeping track, that is 27 hours. Again, I am in pain, irritated, hungry, and tired. We get into the car and as soon as we pull out of my friend's driveway I turned towards her and said "Can we please stop at the closest McDonald's. I am so hungry" she laughed and said sure. We passed at least 5 McDonald's. She then hits me with the "there's a Burger King like 45 min away, close to the school, can we go there?" and I just nodded my head bc I was just happy to be given the chance to eat.
We get to the Burger King and I am not kidding you. I ordered a Bacon Whopper with a side of large fries and large drink bc I was so hungry. I ate all of it before pulling into the driveway of my school. That burger is the size of my head and has enough fucking mayo on it for it to be it's own producer plant of mayo. It was heavenly.
I got all my stuff to my room (which was on the third floor of a building that only certain people could use the elevator) and passed out on my bed for an hour, woke up to tell my friend I was on campus. Did Not Touch My Luggage. And then passed tf back out till the next morning :)
TL;DR: I had the longest and worst travel of my life that lasted from 1 pm on a Friday till 7 pm on a Saturday, where I barely slept, ate, used the bathroom, and got heavily embarrassed.
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romanceismycallingcard · 4 years ago
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50 questions tag!
I got tagged by @bl-crossingtheline​! Hello darling! Sorry I’m so late on this. Needed a good block of time and then I just kept forgetting. 😜😂
Questions:
what color is your hairbrush? Aqua/Teal
name a food you never eat: Brussel sprouts. And fish.
are you typically too warm or too cold? Um... in winter I’m just perpetually cold. I prefer to be on the warmer side. But as I’ve gotten older that’s changed a little bit. But I don’t know if I’m like always cold or whatever.
what were you doing 45 minutes ago? lol eating fresh home made sour dough bread with my family.
what’s your favorite candy bar? 100 grand bars
have you ever been to a professional sports game? yes. a hockey game with my family and brothers’ hockey teams. 
what’s the last thing you said out loud?: My brother was leaving so I yelled BYEEEEE HAVE A NICE DAY from my room and he said NO~! YOU HAVE A NICE DAY! so then I said FINE IF YOU’RE FORCING ME TO. lol. That was one of our nicer interactions 😂
what’s your favorite ice cream?: anything with caramel or maybe moosetracks. Or just plain vanilla cuz it’s classic, yummy, and underappreciated.
what was the last thing you had to drink? milk
do you like your wallet?: Yes! I do! I found it years ago at a thrift store and it was just perfect for me. It’s black with a pretty metal thing with engraved flowers on it. It zips closed AND there’s a coin pouch inside. And it’s the kind that folds in half rather than the kind that looks like a clutch purse which I’m really glad about because the clutch purse shaped ones seem to almost never be quite the right size - either too big or too small and sometimes the latch breaks so then it just flops open. :P
what’s the last thing you ate? sour dough bread
did you buy any new clothes last weekend? um.... no. But i did this last Friday cuz I had to pick up some things from Walmart and I impulse bought a $10 dress that looked comfy and light weight and casual and I can wear it on days when I don’t want to wear pants. I didn’t have a good dress for days like that before.
what’s the last sporting event you watched? uh...... i don’t. Unless my friend showing me a two minute compilation clip of the danish (i think?) sport of jumping over rivers with a pole counts. or unless watching super junior perform counts. 
what is your favorite flavor of popcorn? butter + salt or white cheddar
who’s the last person you sent a text to? real texting it was a mom I babysit for. But more recently than that I was messaging blue (musicdramalove) on tumblr.
ever go camping? my family used to go camping a lot - like at least once a year. But we haven’t for several years now since all my siblings and I are adults now. I think I might’ve gone with friends a couple years ago though. idk.
do you take vitamins? nope. If I get sick, I drink a looooooot of orange juice.
do you go to church every sunday? yeah
do you have a tan? not right now. hopefully I will by the end of summer (if not June)
do you prefer chinese or pizza? chinese (but pizza’s good too)
do you drink soda through a straw? not unless I order it at a restaurant and it’s in a glass. But that’s rare. I usually order water or sometimes a cocktail.
what color socks do you usually wear? I have a set that’s cream, a couple greys, and white, and I have a set that’s cream, grey and light pink.
do you ever drive above the speed limit? heck yeah. Usually I keep it to about 5-10 above. But it also depends on what streets I’m on.
what terrifies you? Failing at working a career job or living a miserable life or being alone forever with no one to take care of me when I’m sick.
look to your left, what do you see? my purse on the floor next to my dresser
what chore do you hate the most? scrubbing my shower/bathtub.
what do you think of when you hear an australian accent? steve the animal guy or liam and chris hemsworth or KJ Apa or Rebel Wilson. Or the other day when I was talking to my nanny kiddos about accents and the girl and I could do decent-ish british accents but absolutely failed at an Aussie accent
what’s your favorite soda? root beer
do you go in fast food places or just hit the drive thru? depends on the day or sometimes the line of cars in the drive thru
what’s your favorite number? 4. idky but I’ve always thought of it as my lucky number. Plus I just like it. It’s even. It’s small. 2 + 2 = 4 and 2 x 2 = 4.
who’s the last person you talked to? my brother when I was yelling bye to him.
favorite cut of beef? yeah i really don’t know or care
last song you listened to? We by Yesung
last book you read? honestly can’t even tell you.
can you say the alphabet backwards? YES I CAN AND I’M VERY PROUD ABOUT THIS
favorite day of the week? mmm..... saturday because I usually see my friends on saturday and also refuse to do homework on saturdays.
how do you like your coffee? with a big scoop of hot chocolate powder and quite a bit of half and half. sometimes I forego the chocolate powder but my preference is to have it. 
favorite pair of shoes? oooh..... I love my shoes. I have so many that I like. um... okay I’m gonna say it’s this one pair of brown heels I have. They look kinda like leather, orangey-brown, 4in tall heel, and they’re almost like ankle boots because the material goes to just below my ankle. They look amazing with skinny jeans.
time you normally get up? mm..... somewhere between 8 and 9 I guess if I wake up naturally. But I have to get up at 6:15 for work and 7am on days when I have church bc I’m head of nursery (but church is at 10am and online cuz quarantine)
sunrise or sunsets? hm.... I guess sunset bc it sets behind the mountains and it’s gorgeous.
how many blankets on your bed? rn 1 really light one cuz summer’s basically here.
describe your kitchen plates? white with a red and grey design on them with a red border on the edge
describe your kitchen at the moment? currently a mess bc things are being moved around and sorted and everything is everywhere. Other than that, it’s got a sink, fridge, oven, dishwasher, you know, the uszh. 
do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? mm.... right now I guess my go to is a moscato wine. I think that’s my favorite thing right now. You can call me a wimp but hey it’s a step up from Mike’s hard mango punch. I also really like mules.
do you play cards? yes.
what color is your car? silver. and it annoys me bc it looks like every other unimpressionable unremarkable unmemorable car out there :p
can you change a tire? .............................................no.
your favorite state/province/county/etc.? MINE
favorite job you’ve had? my babysitting job for a neighborhood family. I’ve been babysitting them for about 7 years now and I have been with them for two of their kids’ births and I’ve gotten to watch them grow up and develop personalities and learn about life and it has been such a fun experience and blessing to me.
how did you get your biggest scar? okay so I don’t know about biggest, but the one that I’ve probably had the longest and is still clearly visible is one that’s on my foot. It’s about a cm long and is about an inch or so in from the base of my second toe on my right foot. I got it when I was... I think a sophomore in high school when my family visited my bro and sis-in-law out of state for Thanksgiving. I went to grab a bottle of sparkling apple cider out of the fridge but, in the process of grabbing it or moving something aside or something, the bottle of sparkling cider fell out of the fridge onto the tile floor right next to my foot and SHATTERED. I was frozen in shock. Didn’t know what to do. Felt embarrassed and felt bad about the broken bottle and mess. I didn’t even realize until my mom and sis-in-law were cleaning up the floor around me that there was a small shard of glass somewhat embedded in my foot. I don’t remember feeling any pain from it. I think I was probably still in shock. But I still have the scar. 
Tagging: I don’t really know and I’m tired so ANYONE WHO WANTS TO 😊
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chrsitophwaltz · 5 years ago
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MICKEY MEETS FC BAYERN (PART 4/4)
for the entire houston clownery experience click here
psa: if you’ve read the last 3 parts, then you know the drill. i just wanna add that i don’t know how coherent this is bc writing it drained me already. i typed it straight from my garbage brain so this is obviously NOT SAFE FOR WORK. if you’re brave or thirsty enough, or have holy water at the ready, then by all means please proceed.
*matthew mcconaughey voice* alright alright alright
we’ve reached the end, folks! it’s taken me longer than i thought to put this part out. mainly because my brain still can’t comprehend that this actually happened. y’all know that feeling where something happened and you just floated right through it then a few hours later when you’re all alone it hits and destroys you like a fucking trainwreck?
yeah, that’s what it’s been like.
so to recap:
friday: the team arrived. i was positioned nicely near the bus exit and my mind, body, and soul had been buzzing and ready for that moment. i had it all well-rehearsed too: niko steps out, i scream like a banshee for his name, he comes over-- with soft hair and glorious stubble and all-- to sign my shirt and take a gazillion pics. oh, and of course i try not to faint or drool all over him. it was almost fullproof. the problem? he never stepped out. he and thiago went straight to the airport for a press conference and were never in the team bus. i was ready to unleash death right then and there.
but oh well. all hope isn’t lost. i’m gonna be five rows behind the bayern bench the next day during the game anyway. got the tickets within an hour or so after sales opened. i can thirst to my heart’s content over him and his beautiful backside for two hours. and i had this huge ass sign ready, asking for his bottle. it’s bigger and brighter than my life. he CANNOT possibly miss that, right?
saturday: game day! i’ve been buzzing the entire morning and early afternoon. today’s the day! my first time inside a football (american) stadium too. and i was kinda nervous about my sign’s debut too. what if he does see it and give me his bottle? what would i do? do i manage to keep cool or do i smash it right into my eye socket in front of him? until now i still don’t know
so we go down to the stadium. my sign was getting some attention too. people, bayern fans and madridies alike, stopped me and asked what it meant (i had to sheepishly explain to random people that yes, i am indeed asking for his bottle, and no, y’all don’t wanna know why). some guy even got it on his video camera but idk what he did with it sjdfdjkfdjkfsfs
i got settled into my seat and h o l y s h i t i was so close to the pitch and the bench! all the drama? i got it! all the shirt-changing action? i got em too! and all the angry niko antics??? best believe they’re seared into my mind forever and ever!!!!
(dare i say, with full risk of sounding like a downright whore, the man’s got real juicy buns in the back oven. like, fuck me!!!! he’s fit as fucking fuck!!!!!!!! he also loves to whistle and scream instructions and mouth off to hansi on the bench. oh, and to randomly thrust his hips like nobody’s fuckin business!!!!!!!!)
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(srsly niko, why do that???? GET OFF MY DAMN NECK!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!! my 17-year old sister was beside me and i had to be 110% a responsible, sane adult!!!!!!! even the guy sitting behind us eventually caught on to my thirst since he saw me filming niko the whole duration of the game sddbsjfdjfnsm)
anyway, niko LOVES to hydrate and he probably finished around 4-5 bottles of water. at one point he looked over at where i was and i’m sure as h e l l he saw my sign (it was a huge ass board). but guess what? it’s like he knew just how desperate i was and kept on sexily chugging. god fucking dammit, niko!!!!
y’all know what happened to all those bottles? NOTHING! they’re just piled up on the bench never to be used again. i was right there, niko! A CRUMB! just one fuckin crumb was all i asked for!!!!!!!!!!!! he could’ve thrown that bottle straight at my fuckin face and i would’ve THANKED him
the game ended, we won, and NO BOTTLE. a bitch was sad!!! a bitch was going STIR CRAZY!!!!! the team only had one day left before they left for kansas city. i’ve been trying to get info on how to get into the practice session so i can see him and all the boys. but of course! the training session might as well be in secret because it’s invite-only!!! even the paulaner bbq event was closed. the only events that were open were the mall meet-and-greets. but those wouldn’t have niko or the rest of the boys in them.
please bear in mind again that i decided to shell out extra just to make that one day extension happen. 
i had to see the entire team. i needed to experience niko up close. if i don’t get to do this now, then god knows when i’ll get the chance to do so again.
so, driven by desperation, i made a totally uninformed decision to go to the hotel at some random time the next day. ultimately, it was either the hotel or the carl lewis track. i figured the hotel would be a safer bet since i’d been there before and it was closer to the mall where the meet-and-greets would be (just in case the worst happened and i failed to catch them before they left for practice or wherever).
hotel or track? hotel.
what time? probably 8:30.
did i know what i was doing? absolutely fucking not.
but hey, couldn’t hurt, right? it was bonkers. truly bananas. but what choice did i have? in the end, i just wanted to be able to tell myself that i tried.
sunday:
i’ve been thinking about what to call this part. here’s some of what comes to mind:
1. crazy binch follows crazy idea and it works? it’s more likely than you think!
2. if you like it (i LOVED it) then you should’ve put a ring on it (I MCFUCKIN DID!!!!! in my head at least sksdjfksdfsdfh)
3. the day kathleen krüger probably wanted my head on a spike (and i don’t blame her)!
so the events from parts 1 and 2 happened. saw and greeted kathleen krüger in decent german. it was going pretty well. somewhere in there, during the sven/leon mishap, it finally happened. the moment that i’ve been waiting for. perfection!
*record scratch* eh, not really.
look, i’m 5′3 (and 1/2, i’m gonna insist on that). leon is 6′2. sven is about 6′3 or 6′4? anyway, y’all get it. they’re tall af.
and niko? a very sexy 5′9.
so in the haze of mortification and embarrassment brought about by the sven/leon mishap, i completely missed niko going out of the hotel. the binch literally had to be positioned in between sven and leon and all the other tall german people milling around the hotel. my ass had been on alert for him nearly the entire week (and let’s be real, for months) and when the moment finally presented itself, it completely flew over my head. i nearly ruined my own damn plan.
thankfully though, i’d been chatting with the bayern staff earlier and they knew that i’d been waiting this whole time to meet niko. i wondered out loud, “ugh, when is niko gonna show up he’s usually one of the earlier ones” and the guy in the red audi fcb tour polo shirt frowned and said “what? he literally just went out. didn’t you see him?”
my world literally stopped. i wanted to slap myself. my ears were ringing.
niko, already out? how could i have missed him? had he already gone up the bus???
i literally did a 360 so fast i gave myself whiplash and saw through the glass doors the man i’d been waiting forever for. he was clad in his blue coach kit of shirt and shorts. i could also swear he was glowing like an angel (probably bc of the bright sun or the product of my thirst-addled brain, idk).
there was another problem, though: he wasn’t stopping. he was going straight for the bus. and his leggies were f a s t.
and where was i? still frozen in shock inside the freaking hotel!!!!
i’m not the fastest person in the world but man, adrenaline really does work wonders! thank goodness my brain chose that moment to regain its function and spurred my body into motion. with no fucks left to give, i ran full tilt through the throng of people leisurely heading out, past the security guards who looked at me like i was insane (i was), out of the hotel and into the courtyard where there were about 50 or so fans behind the barriers who had gathered to catch a glimpse of the team.
it was like everything was in slow-mo. there was kathleen, patiently standing near the bus door and taking inventory of the players and staff before they leave. and there was niko, with literally one foot lifted to go up the first step into the bus.
my brain did a quick calculation. even with adrenaline, he’d already be up and inside the bus by the time i get to where he was. they may have let me inside the hotel, but i knew the bus was off limits. i had to stop him before he’s out of reach. and i knew that if i missed him, then that would be the absolute last time i’d see him in houston. that was my last chance.
i already had one foot dipped into the proverbial pool of shame. i was vaguely aware that i had the hotel staff stationed near the door and some fans looking at me bc of my marathon sprint antic. why not just take the full plunge, right?
so i did the only thing i could do to stop him: i screamed for him. throat open, full diaphragm, lungs out screamed: “NIKO! NIKO PLEASE!” my voice and the desperation that it was absolutely dripping with echoed within the walls of the hotel entrance.
i don’t even know the others’ reaction to that anymore, and i don’t really wanna know. all i know was that it worked! he stopped and turned around to look. and god was he. so. beautiful!!!
overjoyed that he paused, i ran straight towards him. there was a body in front of me that i barely dodged in my haste and i belatedly realized it was the team photographer taking shots of the departure. i nearly bowled him over and destroyed his expensive camera but thankfully i somehow managed to do a the matrix-esque maneuver and ducked under his arms and up again straight back to niko. the look on my face must’ve been shocking and horrific (i bet) because as i zoomed in on niko, i saw poor kathleen just behind him, still near the bus door, go tense with her eyes as big as saucers.
look, i understand. if i were the team manager of a popular football team, and some woman was running straight for one of my charges, with A Certain Look on her face, and with the bus door wide open, i’d be worried af. she probably thought i was gonna attack niko (somewhat true, but not in the way she thought...or was it?) and/or infiltrate the team bus. my intentions were pure (ish), of course, but my face didn’t reflect that.
the Queen knew martial arts and could’ve karate-kicked me off the face of the earth and away from niko, but she didn’t. so thank you, kathleen. and i apologize.
safe from kathleen’s wrath (for now), i turned my full attention to niko. i was finally in front of him!!!!! my dream had finally come true!!!!!!!!!!!
my brain and my soul were trying to leave my body and i wasn’t really 100% percent in the moment, but even with the little presence of mind i had left it was too much to bear. niko looked a bit perplexed, like i might attack him or something (with the way i looked, ran, and shouted like an animal i totally get it), but still managed to look relaxed, open, and friendly. he looked at me expectantly and i felt my mouth move to ask for an autograph and my hands give him my cardboarded jersey and sharpie. i wasn’t in control of my body anymore but thank god it knew exactly what i wanted.
niko, a true angel sent down from the heavens above, gracefully took my shirt and sharpie. i’m pretty sure my mouth was wide open and probably had some drool hanging off, and i could feel kathleen’s stare boring holes into the side of my head. as he was signing it, my last few brain cells were roasting.
his hair was soft and ungelled, and was damp (he looked like he recently just came out of the shower) and as his head was bent down, That Stray Lock of Hair flopped into his forehead. it nearly made me pass tf out!!! the sun was also shining brightly and his stubble was already silvery (thanks to bayern’s season of clownery!) so when the light caught it, it literally shone. each strand was literally p e r f e c t i o n. perfect length, perfect texture (from the looks of it; i didn’t dare touch no matter how much i wanted to bc thankfully i still had one fragile shred of dignity left, and i’m sure kathleen would’ve brought out the shotgun), perfect everything. i was about to have a coronary right then and there.
i’ve thought a lot about what i wanted to say to him if i did get the chance to meet him and talk to him. i remembered all the highs and lows of last season and as he finished signing my shirt, i thanked him and said “good luck, niko. and don’t listen to everything they say; you’ll always have people to stand behind you and the team no matter what.” at least that’s what i thought i said. i don’t really remember bc i was half spaced out. but i must’ve said something to that effect bc he looked up from what he was doing and gave me a big, and dare i say, relieved (?), smile. god, his eyes. they were so green. and soft. and really, really kind.
he was probably surprised that i said that to him, what with my earlier crazed stunt. but of course, ever the gentleman, he said “thank you so much” G O D!!!! HIS ACCENT!!!!! if you haven’t heard him speak in english yet, or just speak at all, now’s the time to google that shit. it’s deadly af on video, but goddamn, like everything else about him in person, it’s truly something else live.
mercifully, when he gave me back my shirt and pen, i still had enough life left in me to ask for a picture before i finally passed out. i never would’ve forgiven myself if i forgot!!!
me: thanks again, niko. is it alright if we take a picture?
niko: sure, of course! (god i love him; also, he loves to say “of course” for some reason sjkdhfdfjsdkfh)
so i had my shirt and sharpie in my left hand, and was trying to work my phone with my right hand. niko sidled up real close to my left side and HOLY FUCKING SHIT. he was so warm. and his arm was f i r m. he was leaning really close and my brain was short-circuiting from trying to memorize every single detail and trying to work my phone camera.
(note: my lock screen is niko drenched in beer after they won the bundesliga. thankfully, i turned off my phone’s auto lock just the night before. imagine if he saw me trying to unlock my phone with his wet self plastered on my screen. i never would’ve survived the shame.)
as i was skin on skin with niko, my organs were literally failing. my hands were shaking and sweating, and my camera just. wouldn’t. set. on. photo. it went to video, to slow mo, to god knows what else. it was already getting embarrassing and i was mumbling apologies to niko bc i was sure i’d already taken more than enough of his time. and i haven’t forgotten that kathleen was still there! still staring at us, at me, and witnessing every single mortifying thing!!!!
niko, literally heaven itself incarnate, was so patient though and just chuckled. oh. fuck. me. his chuckle. y’all know his voice is deep af, right? and you know that certain r a s p that comes with it. well, fuck. he did this deep ass raspy chuckle that went straight down to my loins!!!!! christ on a bike!!!! my inner whore was literally about to jump out!!!!! i’ve fantasized about hearing it in person for so long but jesus fucking christ I WASN’T READY. ALL THIS TIME AND MY BODY STILL WASN’T READY!!!! AND I’M DAMN SURE IT WILL NEVER BE READY!!!!!!!!! NO ONE IS READY FOR THIS ATTACK!!!!!!!!
g o d. anyway, he finally took pity on me. he chuckled (i’m on the brink of death here!!!) and reached for my phone to help me take the goddamn photo. he set it on photo (freaking finally, thanks niko) and we posed for the photo. hell, he was so close again. while i tried to smile and look somehow decent, i just had to take away as much detail as i could before we parted.
1. i already said this, but his h a i r. so soft. and houston was freaking humid. while mine was literally about to turn into a bird’s nest from the humidity, the man just couldn’t look fugly if he tried!!! he literally had NO FRIZZ. damn niko, tell me your secret!
2. his stubble was SO CLOSE. every strand? PERFECTION. no words could adequately describe it. and holy shit, his jawline and cheekbones. if i touched it i could literally lacerate my goddamn hand. and he had no pores??? fucking sexy cryptid
3. his c h u c k l e (he wasn’t chuckling anymore, but that shit stays with you till the end of time)
4. HIS S C E N T.
okay. i have a scent kink. i know. TMI. like this whole write up is one big banner for too much fuckin information. but holy shit. HOLY S H I T. until now i still don’t know how to fully describe, and i probably never will succeed in fully conveying what it was truly like (and if my brain embellished some of it; i was really too far gone to know anything anymore), but fuck. f u c k. he wasn’t wearing perfume or cologne, i’m sure of that. nothing too artificial that stood out to my nostrils. probably bc they were going to train under the houston sun and spritzing was wasted and unnecessary. but remember that he was fresh from the shower, so that was basically his main scent. it was very nice, very crisp, very clean. basically, sexy as hell. classy. panty-melting!!!! hell, i don’t know!!!! you know what i mean!!! idk if it’s from the hotel toiletries (if it was, good job post oak hotel!) or if it’s his own (then i need to know niko! what products do you use???). but yeah. clean and crisp. d***y supreme.
and there was also something else. it must’ve been his natural scent. and god. GOD!!!! a bit woodsy (?) and quite sweet. i’ll stop there before i say something that REALLY crosses the line.
so my thumb moves, and we take the photo. ONE FREAKING PHOTO. that’s all i managed. i wasn’t able to look at it until my uber ride to the mall later on, and i really would’ve liked more to take with me and stare at when i’m....lonely. but it was magically HDR, and i looked passable. and niko. again: perfection!!!! now that i know what he’s like in the flesh, nothing else will ever come close. but this does come quite close.
after the photo was taken, i manage to squeak out another “thanks.” niko smiled again (kill me one last time, why don’t you) and squeezed my arm lightly before saying goodbye and finally going up the bus. kathleen could breathe a sigh of relief now.
i don’t know how long i stood there. surely not that long since i still got to take pics with serge, manu, and lewy. but it did feel like forever and i haven’t shaken myself out of it. as i’m writing this, exactly one week later after it happened, i still haven’t shaken myself out of it. i don’t think i ever could.
i’m just thankful to whichever deity made this happen. my houston trip was finally complete (i haven’t met everyone yet at that point, but i just somehow knew deep inside that it would all work out). i got what i came for and more. my extension was not only worth it, but completely priceless. i’ll treasure this whole day and that little moment i got with niko for the rest of my life. that’s for sure.
just to end this, i just wanna say something. i know this was one whole crazy and thirsty post, but seriously. he’s a really nice man. a good man. it wasn’t for more than a few minutes at most, but it felt like forever in my mind. and in that short moment, i just knew he tries his best. i’m a true blue niko stan but even i know he made mistakes. i’m clearheaded enough to acknowledge that. but he tries, and he succeeded. and no matter how calm and cool and collected he always appears to be, you can still see how much it all affects him. hell, he literally grayed in front of our eyes in less than a year. his eyes were a little less bright at the end of the season as compared to his presentation last july. when i gave him that little message of support, i literally saw the relief in his eyes and how much he appreciated it. he and the team have been through quite the ordeal last season, and there are no guarantees it will be easier this time around.
you don’t have to like him, you know. but please. a little basic human respect still goes a long way.
there, i said my piece. and it’s done! thank you, fc bayern, for being so nice and game and all-around wonderful. thank you, kathleen krüger, for staying calm long enough to let me have my moment with niko. and thank you, niko, just for being... you. now here’s the ONE picture i’ll treasure for the rest of my life:
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bucky-iss-bae · 5 years ago
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Smirking Idiot (Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader)
A/N: So, I just wrote this up whilst taking a break from applying for jobs and having interviews bc apparently that's what happens when you leave university. Although I have no clue what I want to do, making money is something. 
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader
Fandom: MCU/Marvel
Prompts: “You look like hell.”  - “What are you doing here?” - Non-Avengers AU
Warnings: Hella amounts of swearwords - arguments??? 
Word count: 1950ish
I want to hopefully write more shit like this to just gain confidence and get better so hope you all enjoy xoxo
Masterlist Fandom list
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Getting home from work on a Friday evening was supposed to be the best feeling, yet you still felt like shit. Mainly because your plans for tonight had been cancelled only hours before. You felt frustrated, another night with a bottle of wine, and watching trash TV with your roommate... hopefully.
“Hey hun, you good?” Wanda asked once you threw your bag down and kicked your heels off,
You pulled a face at her and shook your head, “Honestly, want to cuddle up on the couch and drink a bottle of wine, have a tub of Ben and Jerrys, and maybe, just maybe, fall asleep there and worry about being wine hungover tomorrow along with a bad back”
“Wow, looks like you’ve got all your plans sorted out. Did you do a BuzzFeed quiz to decide what your plans are for a Friday night?” She asked laughed,
You snorted at that, “May as well have that’s how last minute it is” you walked across to your room whilst talking to her, but left the door open just so you could hear here. You’d changed in front of her a hundred times before so now wouldn’t make any difference,
“What happened to date night? Thought you and Bucky were going out, and then probably back to his place?” She asked coming to stand in your doorway,
You had already stripped down to your underwear and grabbed an oversized top to throw on before putting on some shorts,
“So did I” You grumbled, “But he’s tied up in work. Got a lot to sort out at the gym, and I just don’t care at the moment. Well clearly I do, he fucking bailed on me like an hour ago, I now need to cancel the fucking reservation, and I was so excited to eat there as well. It literally got me through the whole day” You wanted to rant and rave because it seemed like Bucky forgot who you were.
“Have you spoken to him since?” She asked,
You shook your head, “Nope. I’ll talk to him later. When I’m not as pissed I guess, but how about you? What are your plans?” you asked walking out of your room and towards the kitchen, you were feeling a sandwich right about now,
“Welll....” She dragged out, “I invited Vis over”
I looked across at her over the fridge door and smirked slightly, “So, either I be a cock block, or a good girl and sit in my room, ensuring I have my earphones in. And making sure I have everything I need so I don’t need to leave my room, and if I do need to leave, well I’ve got a fire escape I’m sure I can figure it out.”
“Without me sounding like a terrible friend, preferably the latter?”
You couldn’t help but snort at that, a smile still on your face though, “Sure babycakes. What time is he getting here?” You asked,
“About half 7ish” She said looking up at the clock
You looked up at the clock groaning at how late you realised it was, it was half 6, and you could tell the evening was going to drag.
“I might just go bed after eating this” You decided,
Before half 7 came around the two of you watched a bit of TV and caught up for a while before you went back to your room. You did feel a little disappointed at how abruptly your plans got cancelled, you got a text from Nat asking if you were ok because Wanda told her you were feeling a bit shit, you were fine and she offered to take you out after her shift ended or if you wanted to join her at work. You declined knowing that her bar wasn’t going to close till late and sitting alone at a bar would probably feel worse than being at home would be. What you also found frustrating was that the two of you had been together for nearly three years, yet at the moment it felt like your relationship was going nowhere.
You two had talked about moving in together but it never felt like the right time, with you working your way up at work, recently becoming a team leader, and with him opening his own boxing gym you were both constantly busy. You took time out for one another but lately, it had become less and less. You sometimes complained about it to the girls, but then felt bad because they’re friends as well, both you and Nat became friends with Bucky at the same time. But then at the same time when you two were together, things were perfect. Better than perfect. You trusted Bucky with anything and everything, he was, is, your best friend. But that just makes feeling the way you do now worse because you’re pissed with him.
You ended up falling asleep quicker than expected, hating that you don’t even fall asleep that early on work nights.
**
Getting woken up by someone knocking on your window rather than your door was enough to put anyone in a bad mood, as well as scaring the shit out of them.
You glared at the window, grabbing the baseball bat from next to your bedside table. The sun was only just rising, and who the fuck would be knocking on your window at this time,
You pushed your curtains to the side, one hand holding the bat ready to swing, your left hand pulling at the curtain.
Crouched down looking around was your dear boyfriend. The one you’re extremely pissed off with. You crossed your arms and narrowed your eyes at him waiting for him to realise that he had in fact woken you up,
He rose his hands again ready to knock on the window but paused when he saw you stood there.
He had a sheepish smile on his face and motioned towards the window for you to open it up,
You huffed and rolled your eyes but opened the window, “What are you doing here?” You bit out,
“To see how you are... how everything’s been?”
“Everything is fucking splendid thanks for asking. How’s work? Isn’t the place caving in without you?” You couldn’t help but ask,
He opened his mouth ready to say something but sighed, “Can I come in, or you going to make me sit in the cold?”
You pretended to think about it for a minute, before motioning your head for him to come in, “I’m still pissed at you”
“Really sugar, I hadn’t noticed”
“No, no pet names James,” You said putting emphasis on his name, but he just stared at you with an amused smirk, “Also, do you hate me that much that you had to come here at, what time is it, what the fuck, 4am? Really?”
He just shrugged at that and threw himself on your bed, still staring at you with that same smirk, you hated it. That’s a lie you fucking loved it, he just got under your skin, the way he did before the two of you got together. But right now you hated it because he knew he was getting under your skin, he knew that you were pissed at him, but he also knew that you would probably forgive him soon enough,
“Really really” He replied back, “Nothing wrong with wanting to see my girl right?” He asked,
You couldn’t help but roll your eyes and throw your arms up in the air, “You are so annoying. Wow! What about when I want to see you huh? What about when ‘I want to see my man’ I can’t even go on a date with you at the moment, everything is work, work, work. Then we all go out, but its more about a drink with the boys and then you cancel on me an hour before I have to leave work. I then had to cancel our reservation. Do you know how much I was looking forward to eating a good fucking steak and dessert! But no, because we only see each other when it suits you, and then, then I was in bed for half 7, how early is that, and I was asleep before 9. What the fuck is up with that! Because I was pissed and upset, and annoyed. And now you woke me up early which is even worse. But I just...”
During your rant he sat up a bit straighter, sometimes you wondered whether he even listens to what you have to say.
“I’m sorry sweetheart. I was just busy with work. I wanted to see you as well ya know, why do you think I’m here”
You just stood there your arms still crossed against your chest, “I don’t know. To annoy me some more”
“Of course sugar. Cause’ that’s my life aim, to constantly try and annoy you” He said raising his eyebrows at you,
“Bucky” You groaned, sitting beside him,
“Y/N” He groaned back, “You know I prefer when you say my name like that when we’re in bed. Not when you’re trying to start an argument with a baseball bat in your hands” He said reaching over to grab the bat from your hands, instead your jaw just dropped as you stared at him,
“Trying, trying to start an argument. How am I trying to start an argument? You started it when you bailed on us last night for your precious work!”
“I know, and I said I’m sorry. I mean... how about I make it up to you. We’ll go for breakfast together. Grab some nice food. My treat. We’ll have date night tomorrow night as well. The gyms closed on Saturday nights anyway”
“It’s going to take more than just breakfast to make it up to me Bucky” You mumbled feeling defeated,
“I know sweetheart. But I gotta start somewhere right” He asked putting his arms around you and kissing your shoulder,
“Starting by waking me up at 4am is not the best way to start” You reminded him,
He just chuckled against your shoulder at that, “Yeah, after finishing up at the gym about half 2, I went home, showered then went for a run and somehow ended up here”
You spun your head around to face him, another glare set on your face, “James Buchanan Barnes. Have you not slept?” You asked sounding more like a mother than a girlfriend,
He just grimaced at you, “I have a reasonable excuse”
“Uh huh, what’s that?” you asked,
“I mean, I pissed off my girl last night. And I wanted to make sure she’s good, ya know what I’m sayin’”
You shoved his shoulder, “I hate you, why do you make me feel bad?”
“How’d I make you feel bad?” He asked, his smirk back on his face, “Because of all the shoutin’ you done at me despite not having slept in over 24 hours”
“Yes James! Exactly why, but this explains why you look like hell”
“You still love me though Sugar.”
“Mhmm, I do still love you, but no more bailing on me”
“I’ll pinky promise it” He mumbled sticking out his pinky finger, you chuckled and intertwined your pinky with his.
“Now lay down, you need to get some sleep before we go out for brunch” You told him pushing him onto your bed. He took you down with him and you ended up with your head on his chest, and your legs intertwined.  
“Love you” He mumbled,
“Love you too” You replied back smiling a little to yourself as the two of you drifted off to sleep.
A/N: So, I want to write up a Bucky x Reader Fic, but like I just, I want to make sure it’s perfect. Like planning the storyline and everything like that. I just want to push this blog farrr because I’m enjoying sharing my writing. 
But any feedback will be greatly appreciated xoxo 
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utilitycaster · 5 years ago
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hi! I hope it's okay to ask but about the latest critrole ep (87) I think I might have missed something bc everyone's reaction what trent said to caleb is really intense. did caleb cast disguise self at some point? or was it the amulet? cause I thought the amulet only stopped trent from scrying on him? why did everyone have such an intense reaction?
Yes, you can ask - unless I’ve said so, usually I’ve seen the latest episode by Saturday morning (U.S. Eastern time) at the latest, and often by Friday.
Caleb did not cast disguise self, and you are correct about the amulet. The reaction is because Trent recognized him and said so.
I guess my question back is what you feel would be an appropriate reaction. It’s not strange to assume that Trent might recognize Caleb; given that he was probably keeping tabs on Caleb at the asylum he’s probably going off what Caleb looked like 5-6 years ago which would be pretty close to what he looks like now. The reaction isn’t “oh shit, it’s shocking that Trent recognized Caleb,” it’s “Trent used Caleb’s real name in front of the group, in the throne room, as a deliberate power move, to the person he physically and psychologically abused, magically gaslit, and caused to have a mental breakdown, and who is in an extremely vulnerable position right now.”
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queen-rogah · 5 years ago
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Chasing Dreams - Part 7
Part summary: You and Victoria went around Kensington. Freddie knew that you’re writing your own songs as he reads over your journal. Roger heard you sing your own songs, a mild confrontation of you and Rosalie again. The Saturday pub gig came, you’ve met Smile’s enemy and the night ended with something worse…
Warnings: PURE ANGST, mild fluff, mild violence, strong language
Word Count: 6.1k+ words
Note: I will be updating each chapter summaries from now on :) This story isn’t chronologically accurate in the real Queen timeline (bc we all know their band name Queen is used in 1970, but in this story which is set in 1971, their band name is still Smile) so I hope you guys understand :)
*MASTERLIST*
PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | PART 5 | PART 6
♡♡♡ PART SEVEN: “FLOTSAM CHAOS” ♡♡♡
You and Victoria spend time from each places she showed you around in Kensington. She showed you where she worked as a local dressmaker and let you look at her custom dresses she made for the past four years. Victoria is a actually a sweet lady, just like Freddie that’s why they’re made for each other. She pointed out the record stores, establishments where they buy clothes, food and other needs. And then the pub where they are performing on every Saturdays.
“This is Flotsam, or also known as Dixon’s for us. The boys perform here every Saturdays and they have this band enemy everytime they will perform on stage.” Victoria said as you both stood just right outside the pub.
“Freddie told me about that, the Neon Youth right?.” You replied.
“It’s not the whole Neon Youth who hated them, only the lead singer of that group. Lola Kinsley. A total demon spawn.” Victoria said as she pulls out a cigarette and light it up.
“Why would she hate the band? That’s just so mean.” You said.
You heard her clicked her tongue, “Well, Lola’s band is actually the first one to conquer the stage, but when Smile came in and lots and lots of people loved them. She grew jealous, that’s why she despise them so much. Especially Brian.”
“Brian? She despise him more than the others?.” Your eyes widened.
“I don’t know why but we knew that Lola have feelings for Brian before when they are still new in the pub, but Brian turned her down because she isn’t his type and that’s why she hated him, just wanted to forget how he turned her down.” Victoria explains and that made your mouth fell agape a little bit.
“That’s just so tragic. I guess Brian found his perfect girl, my own sister.” You chuckled.
“Wait…Rosalie is your sister?.” Victoria asks as you nod your head in response. “No offense to your own sister but I actually don’t like her, I have this negative aura around her. But since she’s making Brian happy, then I’m happy as a friend.”
You want to smirk in delight that this woman who is Freddie’s girlfriend also don’t like Rosalie. You didn’t liked your own sister at all, “No it’s fine, me and my sister aren’t that close so you can tell what you feel against her, I won’t tell a single soul about it.” You smiled.
“You’re far more better than her. She’s just so desperate of Brian before.” She mumbled, finishing off her cigarette and flick it off her hands, stomping on it.
“What do you mean?.” You asked as you both walk away from the pub and back to their place again.
“The first time that Rosalie found the pub, Roger was actually the first one to make a move but she wanted Brian to do that and rejected blondie. I felt so bad to Roger that night.” Victoria snickers.
“I didn’t know that Roger was the first one who made a move.” You replied. When you two arrived back at their place again, you heard some voices inside, knowing that the other boys visited.
“Yep. Now you know.” She said as she opens the door for you go inside and she followed suit. You see Brian and Roger sitting on the sofa, John is sitting beside Freddie who’s in front of the piano, playing some random tunes. “Hi everybody!.” Victoria hollered in the room as they set their eyes on you and her.
“Done showing her around?.” Freddie asked his girlfriend, watching her walk towards him and gave him a kiss again then nodded at him that she had showed you around.
Your eyes dropped on Brian without Rosalie by his side, so you have a questioning look at him. “Where’s Rosalie?.” You asked.
“Oh. She’s out for a job hunt.” Brian replied, smiling at you. You are tempted to seat beside him in the sofa but you saw Roger scooted on the vacant space between them and let you sit beside him. You thanked him and puts his arms behind you on the sofa. The sofa was small, that’s why his thighs are in contact to yours, trying yourself not to blush hardly beside him. Freddie is only the one who notices your flustered self beside the blond drummer. So he just look away and played the piano again.
“What brings you here?.” You asked them.
The bassist replied your question, “Honestly, we don’t know why we’re here. Why are we here Fred?.” John asked the singer who stopped on playing the piano again.
“I need some help for the songs I’ve wrote, maybe rate it or something.” Freddie said, getting the papers on top of the piano and gave the paper to John. John approaches you all here as he gave the papers to Roger and Brian.
“I like this song you wrote, maybe we’ll record this soon.” Roger said as he pointed on the paper with the song called Liar.
“I’m actually planning on an album. We really should think big already.” Freddie said.
Then there was silence.
“We can’t afford an album.” John spoke through the silence.
“He’s right. We should wait for the right time.” Brian said.
Your mind circulates around their small argument because this is what a rising musicians wanted, an album, and what John said, making an album is surprisingly expensive. And what if the people won’t like the album? That would be a waste.
Freddie just sighs and look away from the boys again, playing a tune on the piano again. His urge of wanting to record their songs in a recording studio is also the same feeling as yours wanting to be a performer. You and the boys want the chase your dreams without limits. Life has just those damn limits, but it still carry on. Maybe later on it will happen.
You brought out your journal with the songs you’ve been working on through the years. You have wrote over 8 songs, but you haven’t sang a single one of it. You have worked on the melodies of it, already had some guitar chords along the words in the pages. You took your guitar again and started strumming silently, since it’s already 10 in the evening. You’re alone here in the living room where the pull-out bed was, only the small lamp on the desk beside the sofa was lighting up this room. You hum the tune of the song you worked on before and then you scanned the pages again, finding the empty page again and you want to write another song again.
And so you did.
You wrote the words that are preserved inside your brain and add more sentences about the things you’ve been thinking about lately, especially your feelings towards Brian and to Roger too. You still haven’t made up your mind what the hell have you brought yourself into. Brian was taken, by your sister but Roger isn’t taken. It’s just so wrong that Brian was one of the people you wanted to spend more time with you.
Then you stopped writing when you saw Freddie stepped out the their room as he snap his head at you, “Hey, you still up. You need to sleep, tomorrow’s the big day again at Dixon’s.” He said, making his way towards the kitchen and drank a glass of water.
“Yeah, of course. I’m just…finishing something.” You gave him a small smile as you closed your journal, putting it back in your bag again and set your guitar down on the floor.
“You writing something?.” He asked.
You sighed and smiled, “Yeah. But it’s no biggie because I’m not actually performing my own works. It will be so embarassing.”
Freddie approaches you as he reach out his hand, “Give me the notebook, I’ll read some.” He nicely asked.
Your eyes widened, “That’s really a bad idea Freddie. I won’t show you anything.” You nervously chuckled.
“Let me Y/N, maybe it’ll take my breath away.” He grins, still had his hand reaching out for the journal hiding in your bag. You pout your lips and just move away your bag from him, never taking him the chance to look over to your journal.
“It’s already midnight Fred, tomorrow’s your performance in the pub right? So you need sleep and energy, just all of that.” You rolled your eyes and lay down on the bed, wrapping yourself up in the duvet.
“You’re no fun Y/N, I’ll take a chance on it soon.” Freddie chuckles. You look over to him, still pouting.
“Never.” You giggled. Watching him swat his hand away to you and left the room for you to sleep. You sighed deeply and just stare at the ceiling, replaying the words you’ve wrote on your journal. You are thinking about showing it to Freddie, maybe soon.
It’s gone.
Just this early in the morning.
By the time you flutter your eyes open when you felt the sun rays through the thin curtains of the room. Your body leaning over to your side where you put your bag, your eyes widen to see it’s zipped open. You quickly sat up the bed and look through your bag, knowing that your journal is already gone. You took a deep breath when you heard Freddie’s mumble of voice from his room as you stood up from the bed, not caring you’re just wearing a huge shirt with just your knickers underneath and socks. You lean on the door frame to see him reading your journal, smiling at it.
You cleared your throat to get his attention, “I thought we’re over this Fred. Ever heard of the word never?.” You crossed your arms.
“Like I said darling, I’ll take a chance and so I did.” He replied, going back in reading the journal. You can’t believe yourself you’re not mad, so you just entered the room and sat beside him on the edge of the bed. Looking at the page he’s reading. It’s the song you’ve made just the night where Brian went to your house, heard him and your sister doing their business next to your room as you blast out the songs from Hendrix. You remember writing that song with the inspiration of finding true happiness. And that you formed it into poem then to a song.
“You like it?.” You asked him and he look at you with a warm smile on his face.
“Very much. You’re a great song writer actually and the way you already write the chords for the melody. That’s talent.” He compliments. The red shade on your cheeks appeared again since no one aside from your father and Jonathan compliments your own songs. They are the only ones who have read your journal and no one else.
Now Freddie came in.
“Thanks.” Your voice came out as a shy mumble and sighed. “Freddie?.”
“Yes darling?.”
He closes your journal as he listens.
“Should I…start performing my own songs now? It’s been years that those songs are sitting there, waiting to be sung. I have never played those songs in full version.” You asked. Freddie clicked his tongue as he thought of a reply.
“You know what, fuck those bloody inhibitions about your own writings Y/N. No one will ever stop you from writing those. Songs are meant to be sung, you won’t know what’s ahead of you. If you just need some help in performing these masterpieces, you have us.” He replied.
A smile crawled up to your lips, reminiscing Brian’s words from the pub days ago and how he also said that nothing would go wrong if you perform your original songs. That was one of your biggest fears, but through their words to you, maybe that fear is already fading away.
Freddie gave back your journal as you look down on it, just laying on your lap. You have been deciding if you want to sing this or else nothing will happen spectacular in your life.
Roger and John arrived at Freddie’s place. Your eyes never leaving the blond drummer as he shot you a smile before he approaches you, giving you a kiss on your cheek. His hair is getting longer, even John’s too. Their performance at Flotsam will be two hours away from now, Freddie is telling them their set list. Roger sat beside you on the sofa, leaving John and Freddie talking in the kitchen. He saw you writing away on your journal again, never missing out any song ideas. Sometimes you just ran out, and sometimes those ideas are bursting out in a never ending rate. It was annoyingly amazing.
“Hey there.” Roger said. You didn’t even notice him sitting beside you because you’re too focused writing. So when you heard him greet, you immediately closed the notebook and smiled at him.
“Hi.” You squeak.
He let out a chuckle. You smiled as you blushed.
“So you write your songs too? How many by now?.” He asked.
You sighed, “I don’t know and it’s just too many. Some aren’t finished yet and some are already. This journal is just a one huge nothing, Rog. It’s nothing important.” You said, babbling your mouth like it’s just nonsense to you. But it’s not.
“Written songs aren’t nonsense, what are you talking about? That’s an art.” He said. It’s too much compliments in a day to your original songs.
“Thank you, I guess. Freddie’s been asking me if I want to sing some of my songs. Well, me as a stupid fuck, I’m still doubting myself.” You said.
Roger was stunned in what you’ve said as he shakes his head. You followed his movements as he took your guitar and sat beside you again, “Doubting is just a waste of time. Play something for me.” He commands.
“What?.”
“Play something for me, from what you’ve created.” He said, giving you your guitar. You want to decline but you mentally cursed at yourself, grabbing your guitar from him as you scanned the pages of your journal. You stopped on the song you’ve wrote back when you’re 18, it’s about William, even though you’ve hated him of what he’d done, you thought that this song is one of your favorites. Your feelings and emotions have been poured out into this song.
And so you started strumming, playing the chords.
The soft and pop melody made Roger tap his fingers on his lap.
The first verse. The chorus. The second verse. He seems to enjoy it.
You have a smile on your face as you sang your own song, in front of somebody. Roger felt special to hear you sing to him, watching you sing with your heart is making him happy. But then someone interrupts the little performance. You both look over to your left to see Brian and Rosalie entered the place.
“I never thought there was a secret performance here.” Brian teases.
You blushed. Again.
Roger was pissed because you haven’t finished singing.
“I didn’t see you there.” You smiled, standing from the sofa. Roger doing it shortly too.
“Where’s Fred?.” Brian asked you, not setting his eyes on Roger. You have told that they are in the kitchen, he made his way there and even Roger followed too. You sighed, sitting down on the sofa as you close your journal.
“So? You and Roger? Did something clicked?.” Rosalie suddenly asked.
Your cheeks heaten up again, “No, there’s nothing between me and Roger. No…” You replied.
“You sure sis?.” She teases. Nudging your sides.
“I’m very sure. I don’t know if he have feelings towards me or…something.” You laughed.
Wow. You laughed with your sister who hated you so much.
“Oh you don’t know Y/N, some things will happen unexpectedly.” She said, “Just like me and Brian, it’s unexpected.”
You rolled your eyes, never caring what she’ll say about their relationship, “Yeah. Good for you, but I’m not like you Rosalie who gets the man that fast.” You replied.
“Why? Want to be me so that you’ll get Roger whenever you want?.” She asked.
You fume in annoyance.
“No thanks. I’m not desperate to have him actually, not just like you. So excuse me, I have to get ready for tonight.” You snapped as you left your sister sitting on the sofa. You smirked to yourself that you didn’t became weak to her, finally standing up for yourself to have that platform rising.
Rosalie was beyond pissed.
The drive from Freddie’s place to Flotsam was only minutes away. Roger’s van was used because they have their equipments inside. He parked it at the back as you all helped one another in bringing out their instruments, Freddie’s microphone and the tambourine. You’ve felt so relieved when Rosalie isn’t tagging along with you all tonight since something came up at her work that is urgent.
Once you stepped out of the van, done with helping them. Brian suddenly approaches you. “Hey, you seem tense.” He asked. Still a bit tense from your small argument with your sister.
You’re tongue tied in front of him, “I uh, I’m fine really. Haven’t slept that much last night.” You lied.
“Oh. Okay, but if you need something, just approach us okay?.” He said. You nod as you stood beside Roger with Freddie as you all entered the pub. It was jam packed, people are already watching the band performing on stage. This place is far more larger than your father’s pub, seeing the audience swaying and dancing with their music in all shapes and sizes.
“Neon Youth.” Victoria suddenly spoke beside you as she pointed on stage. “Always comes first to get the attention of the people, not wanting the band to outshine them.”
You watched the lead singer Lola sang their music as she played her white electric guitar that matches her white velvet flares. Their music was surprisingly good, more like the taste of Pink Floyd and a dash of Hendrix too. Since Freddie described their music was Hendrix on serious drugs, maybe he’s wrong. Maybe.
“How are you all tonight?.” Lola spoke through the microphone with her thick British accent. The audience roared as you heard Freddie snicker from your left side.
“Come on darlings, it’s already their last song.” Freddie said and you moved by the side of the stage, your eyes never leaving Lola performing their last song. With only your eyes on her, you suddenly tripped on someone’s foot but both of your forearms were caught by also both by Roger and Brian.
“Be careful. The crowd’s getting thick.” Brian said, dangerously close to you as the people here are arriving more and more. So your bodies came in contact. You gulped as you nod at him, but Roger suddenly pulled you close to him, letting his hand intertwine with yours. You’ve felt nervous between the both of them as Brian finally lets go of your arm, letting you go with Roger.
Now things are getting weirder again.
But Victoria is a life saver when she finally asks you to come with her by the bar so that the boys can get ready with her performance. Roger lets you go with Victoria as she dragged her by the end of the room, lesser people are here. She ordered drinks for you and her as you both sat on the stools, overlooking the stage.
“You and Roger…” Victoria spoke while you’re drinking. You stopped on your tracks. “Is there something going on with you and him?.” She smirks.
“Oh no, no. There’s nothing and there’s no way. I just met him days ago, so if you’re thinking something different. It’s way out of the line.” You said with a chuckle.
“I’m not thinking something different Y/N, I just thought you and Roger are good together.” She said.
“Oh.” You mumble. “But I don’t think he likes me, we’re just friends…”
“Friends always turn into lovers. Or maybe someone is just distracting you from Roger.” That smirk of her returned on her lips again as she finishes her drink.
You fell into silence when she said that, looking by the stage to see Roger and Brian talking to each other. You don’t know what to feel, because everything will go down in flames if you’ll just do one stupid move with your feelings. Life isn’t treating you well, you hated it. Everything has it’s own consequences.
Lola’s group finally ended their performance as they move out of the stage, seeing her bump shoulders with Brian, never cared of saying sorry. You glared at her as you watch her meet up with other people in this place. But then your eyes followed to Freddie’s direction who’s already standing on stage, calling out the people.
And they sang the first song of their performance.
Victoria went out in the bathroom as she let’s you go alone here. You’ve stopped drinking since you’re too scared to be drunk again. Two more songs until they conclude their performance for tonight. You’re proud that people are enjoying them, clapping their hands with the beat of the music. You also heard some women shouting with Roger’s name, trying to get his attention.
“You seem new here.”
You look over to your side to suddenly see the one and only Lola standing before you. She’s alone, leaning her back on the bar counter as she watches the boys.
“Yeah. It’s my first time here actually.” You replied to her.
“I saw you with them, so I guess you’re some kind of a groupie or something. A fuck toy of the group.” She snickers. Your heart fell in what she just said about you.
Now that’s beyond rude. And where’s Victoria anyway?
“I-I’m not…I’m not a groupie.” You stammered. Brows furrowed as she tilt her head to you, those eyes full of eyeliner looking dead straight at you, then rake her eyes up and down your body.
“Sure looks like it.” She said.
“If you’re just here to insult me or Smile, I guess you better scram.” You threaten. She lets out a laugh and now stood before you like she owns this place, threatening you too.
“Scram? Darling, you’re just new here. I guess that you’re the one who better scram.” She argues.
People are already witnessing the argument. Your hands are forming into fists.
“Why don’t you just admit what I say about you? Am I right? Huh?.”
“And why don’t you just shut your goddamn mouth?.” You snapped. You don’t care if you’re making a scene here, all that you have to do is to stand up for yourself.
“Oh. Feisty, I like it.” She smirks.
“Now quit judging me or Smile, or else. I don’t want to make things wrong here.” You glared at her.
And just in time Victoria came over, noticing Lola here with you. Her eyes widen as she stood in front of Lola, “What’s going on here? And what in the bloody hell are you doing here Lola?.” Victoria asked, crossing her arms.
“I’m just talking to your friend Vicky, I’m doing no harm.” Lola said with sarcasm in her voice. You scoff, rolling your eyes at her.
Then Victoria look back at you, “Is she telling the truth?.” She whispers. You glared at this bleached haired bitch before you who’s looking at her nails then flirts with some random man.
“Just leave her be.” You mumble, going back at the bar, looking away from Lola. You heard Victoria spoke to her before she came walking back to you, ordering another round of drinks again. “What did you say to her?.” You faintly asked.
“I told her to fuck off, what else could I say to her?.” Victoria replied, stuffing her cigarette on her mouth as she lights it. “Smoke?.”
You shake you head, “No, I don’t smoke.” You said with a small smile.
“Oh. My bad.” She chuckles, putting the pack inside the pocket of her jacket and drank what she ordered. The drink and the cigarette in the same hand.
You turn your look at the stage again, Freddie is already singing the last verse of their last song. Roger banging the drums with much energy, John works on the bass to give more beat, Brian gives the song more rock and soul and then Freddie, giving all his best for this gig. And they ended the song, the claps of the people increases as they said their thank you’s. They left the stage, disappears in the thick crowd. You don’t know if there are already a hundred of people in this place. It’s just getting too crowded by now.
“Hey ladies.” You heard Freddie’s voice behind you to see him, John and Roger altogether. Brian isn’t with them, maybe he went to the restrooms.
Victoria compliments Freddie and the boys with their performance while you just stood there feeling empty again, feeling a bit odd with Brian not around. It made you think of Lola and what Victoria had said to you yesterday. Where she and Brian had a thing before but Brian just turned her down, maybe that’s why she just randomly charges you with those words coming out of her mouth.
“Earth to Y/N?.” Your train of thoughts fades out when you heard Roger’s voice from beside you. “Are you okay?.”
You sighed, “Yep. I’m fine Rog, I just…I have to go to the restrooms for a bit yeah?.” You said with a smile.
“Come back as soon as possible, I don’t want you be lost in this crowded room with someone else.” He smirks as you let out a chuckle, nodding in response. A blush created around your cheeks again.
You walk away from the bar and towards the restrooms. You groan when you suddenly see a line for the ladies room, that’s why you rolled your eyes, making your way back there again but you stopped when you heard indistinct shouts from outside. It’s coming from the back entrance of this pub, so you guess it’s just some couple fighting but your curiousity tingles inside your bones as you quietly push the door to see what’s happening.
Your eyes widen to see it’s Brian, arguing with Lola. She’s fuming with anger and Brian, this was the first time you ever heard him scream.
“And so you think I’m dumb?! I’m not dumb Brian! I know you’re with her! You’re with that fucking groupie inside and I know you still want to fucking erase all what I did to you before. I loved you Brian! And this is what I just get in the end? Seeing you with more girls while I’m just laying like garbage before you? I always forgive you! Well what about you? Always making the same bloody mistakes!.” Lola shouts. You expect as tears pouring down, but none did. Maybe she’s already tired crying to him.
“How many times will I have to tell you that we’re not together Lola! All that you’ve been thinking in your mind is wrong and she’s not a groupie! She’s a friend and nothing but a friend! And are you hearing yourself? You loved me?! That’s bollocks Lola! All that you just need before is attention, because your bloody band is dying out and we revived it like some kind of a Frankenstein fuckery. And when I turned you down before, now you’re seeking for revenge. All that you’ve been doing is bullshit and immature and–”
“–no! It’s not bullshit or immature or anything that irritates you! It’s called a fucking comeback May. A comeback that will burn down your career into many pieces, I don’t care if your little band will also be connected. All that I care is to see you feel the sufferings I’ve been through when you turned me down.” She angrily spats.
Brian looks so done.
“You’re a psycho Lola. You’re a goddamn disgrace and a bad influence to everybody. I did the right thing that I turned you down.” The guitarist said, now turning his back at her as he walks away.
But you see her breathe angrily as she wants to hurt him, and that’s the time when you barge out of the door then shouts at her, “Hey!.” You shouted.
They both turn their heads at you as you stood before Lola who has her hand into fists, ready to charge Brian from the back. You suddenly pushed her away from him, the guitarist was shocked that you’re here, trying to protect him.
“She’s coming to the fucking rescue huh? Well that’s just sweet.” Lola sarcastically said as she suddenly pushed you away too. “The groupie came to the rescue.” She laughs.
“Bloody hell Y/N, why are you here?.” Brian asked you.
“Isn’t it obvious? She’s literally going to hurt you right here!.” You replied, pointing at her fists. Lola’s veins are pulsing in anger when you just caught her about to do something so wrong.
Brian returned his look on Lola, he was horrified but somehow mixed with anger at her. “I don’t have any intention on hurting you physically Lola, never. I don’t think I could ever forgive on what you just did.” He said.
“It’s all your fault…” Lola said to you. Your heart began to race, but you stood on your ground.
It’s only been two days since you arrived here in Kensington and now someone already hated you, for no reason.
“It’s all your goddamn fault!.” Lola screamed as she suddenly swing her fists at your direction, hitting on your left cheek. Brian immediately pull you away from Lola, but you break away from his hold, also giving her a hard punch that made her drop on the ground.
“I didn’t do anything for you to hate me! What the fuck is your problem to him?!.” You shouted at her, still on the ground with her hand on her nose, slowly bleeding out.
She didn’t respond.
You touched your cheek as you flinch in pain, feeling there’s a bruise forming already. Then tears fell down from your eyes, Brian again pull you away from Lola as he drag you back to Roger’s van.
“I’m going to call the others, just stay here for me okay? Stay here and don’t move.” He all said that in one breath as he closed the passenger door, watching him run back inside.
You can’t imagine yourself hurting someone until now, and you have a bruised cheek. Your father would kill you if he finds out about this.
Paranoia.
You heard their voices approaching, “Why did you just let her hurt Y/N?! Are you fucking stupid Brian?! Where is she?!.” Roger shouted at the guitarist.
Brian looked guilty. Then said that you’re inside the van. Roger was the first one to run towards the van and opened the door, seeing you still drowning in your tears and you cheek covered with a bruise.
“I swear I did this so that she won’t hurt him, don’t blame Brian on this. It’s not his fault…” You cried but Roger just hushed you, as you left the van, hugging the blond drummer.
“C'mon guys let’s bring her home and give her some medicine.” Victoria said. Roger helped you get inside the van again as let John and Freddie sit with you since he’s driving. Brian hasn’t said a single word, he just look over to you if you’re still okay.
On the ride back to Freddie’s place, you head rested on John’s shoulder. Tears stopped pouring down as you felt more okay that you’re with the people that cared about you.
“I will be the one who’s going to help to clean her up.
"No, I’ll be the one who will. I was the reason behind this.”
Roger and Brian kept arguing over you who’s just sitting on the sofa with a pack of ice pressed against your cheek, Freddie and Victoria are sitting beside you, also listening to them arguing in the same room. Now their argument became worse when Brian brought up the topic that he should be the one to blame about what happened tonight.
“Hey! Can you both shut up already? You’re both not helping. I’ll be the one who’s going to help her, end of discussion.” Victoria stood between the two as they both fell in silence. She helped you stood up, her hand on your back as she led you to the bathroom. You heard the water running from the bath, Victoria pushes off the shower curtain. Seeing you still standing in front of the mirror.
She stood behind you, looking through your reflection, “You have to take a shower Y/N, then I’ll give you another pack of ice again.”
“She wants to hurt Brian earlier and I’m just the one who witnessed their fight…” You mumbled.
“Fight? Lola and Brian are fighting again?.” She questioned.
“It’s about their past, she’s hurt. Really hurt on what happened between them and I was the one she’s been blaming on Brian. She thinks me and Brian are together…or some sort.” You answered.
Victoria sighs, “I swear that girl is too possessive and she put a bruise on your pretty face…”
A smile appeared on your lips as you look down on the ground.
“Bruises will go away. Don’t worry about that…” You silently chuckled.
“Well, you should hop in the bath already and we’ll put another pack of ice there, so that the bruise will go away fast.” She said, leaving the bathroom just for bit until she came back with your towel and clean clothes. Giving it to you.
“Thank you Victoria.” You smiled.
“Call me Vicky.” She chuckles then closed the bathroom door.
Freddie and Victoria offered their bedroom for you tonight. You’re already inside room, lying in silence as you kept remembering what you’ve did earlier. Then Lola’s words to Brian, Brian’s reply. Just their whole argument in general. It was so bad. Maybe their relationship before is a bad relationship, that’s why he ended things with her. You’ve seen what would happen if Brian is still with her, not with Rosalie.
You sat up on your bed when someone knocks on the door, “It’s open.” You said from the bed.
The door opens to see it’s Brian.
You fell silent.
“Are you feeling okay Y/N?.” He asked, taking a seat at the edge of the bed while you’re sat up against the headboard. Only centimeters away from him.
“Physically, yeah. Emotionally, I don’t think so…” You replied. Your voice came into a whisper.
“I-I’m so sorry about Lola. She’s…unbelievable. I can’t believe she did that.” He said.
“Well if I wasn’t there, you’ll be hurt. I swear she’s about to pounce on you in a second when you turn your back at her…” You said. Hands gripping on the bed sheets.
“But you’re the one with the bruise, not me. I should be the one who have that, I deserve it. From her.” He stated. You watch his hands–those boney hands, reach out to you and cupped your bruised cheek. You hiss in pain when he accidentally brush over the bruise.
“I did this to myself, I’m so sorry. You tried to stop me, but I just…I hurt her too.” You felt bad again. Even though she threw the first punch.
“Come here.” He whisper. You hesitate at first but you see his arms open for you, you got in his embrace. So warm. So comforting. “Don’t blame yourself, okay? It’s not your fault.”
You didn’t say another word as you lean on his chest, listening to the beat of his heart.
_________________
And I imagined Debbie Harry as Lola (I love herrrrr but I’m sorry that she had to be a bad guy here haha) And her band Blondie as “Neon Youth” (my brother suggested that name sooo don’t hate me on this)
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