#i *was* gonna do the background properly but i ran out of time and i just want it done at this point tbh

[last-flight-of-fancy]

Chapter two of Eviction Notice is up~

[seneon]

hello :3 for the "kiss me until my lips fall off" fanfic, can i request that you make a whole oneshot on the zipping dress part? no. 4 of the post. make it fluff and suggestive hehe. take your time and ty in advance!!

SILKY RIBBONS ──── touya todoroki × fem! reader.

about. he's the man you will always find to zip and tie every of your dresses. quirkless! au. very romantic. wc of 700+

notes. for @rueclfer ♡ this is liek one of my fav requests to write ever. apart of kiss me until my lips fall off.

no matter how formal or informal the occasion, you always wear dresses without fail. especially the silken backless ones with hundreds of strings and ribbons to tie.

with those endless loops that needed to be tied behind you, of course your fingers alone aren't enough for the knots. so you will always find one man and one man alone to lend a helping hand.

today was no different than the other times. there's a party hosted by your friends that you must attend. you're all dolled up beautifully, and as usual, you couldn't do everything by yourself.

you came into the living room where your boyfriend touya is sunken in the soft couch, endlessly scrolling through his phone. his eyes left the screen upon hearing your door knob twist and you walked out.

touya could feel the corner of his lips turning into a tiny smirk at the sight of you in your new black dress that serves as a gift for you from touya himself. he knew you fancied dresses of these kind, and he simply felt the need to get you more and more of them just to see them embrace you.

the instagram reel he was watching kept playing softly in the background as he admired you from head to toe. touya is lying if he tells you his gaze wasn't exactly just the gaze of admiration. it had a hint of leering in them. his turquoise eyes just couldn't leave you in that pretty dress he has gotten for you.

“need help with the ribbons, baby?” the man finally turned his phone off, lightly tossing it aside before he properly sits on the couch as you hummed in response and turned your back to him.

“this dress is so pretty,” you said as you felt his hands resting on your hips, pulling you closer so you now stand between his legs.

“i knew you'd love it. i have immaculate taste, it seems,” his fingers moved to take hold of the ribbons on each side.

touya already knows how all these ribbons, strings and zips work from the amount of times he has to help you with your finishing touches for each different night.

“touya, you know i love every dress you buy for me, right?”

“mhm.”

“why are they all expensive and backless?”

your question elicited a chuckle from your boyfriend before he tightens the first ribbon of your dress. his fingers wrapped around the second ribbon, playing with it a little bit to feel the luxury that drips along the black silk.

“can’t ever go wrong with spoiling my pretty girl, can i?” he ceases the ribbon grazes before lining them out neatly. his fingers are full of perfected skills as usual— working so swiftly to tie the straps that ran across your back into perfect ribbons.

“besides… you look absolutely gorgeous in backless dresses. it's a shame you don't wear them only for me.”

as he uttered those words out, you felt touya pressing his lips on your bare back just below the second ribbon which he already finished tying. his palms held your hip in place before he continued to pepper kisses onto your lower back where the last round of straps hang loose, ready to be tied.

“touya, you're gonna make me late,” you whispered softly, delving in the way his lips were so gentle yet they mean so much more than he portrays.

your words put a pause to his kissing as he pulled away with a sigh, his breath fanned over the skin of your back.

“just wanna appreciate you in this…” touya murmured under his breath and finally decided to tie the last ribbon before his hands spun you around to face him.

“all done baby,” his arms moved to wrap your hips, his eyes gazing right into your own. “you’re so fucking pretty..”

a smile surfaced across your lips as you looked down at him who held onto you like a child. your fingers moved to cup touya's cheeks, thumb immediately moving to caress them in cloud-like touch.

“thank you, my love.”

in response to that, the man simply kissed your stomach, standing up to capture your lips in a kiss. however, he knew you already did your makeup, so he did not indulge in the kiss as much as he wanted to, for touya knew he wouldn't stop the moment he started.

“i’ll pick you up once you're done partying, yeah? have fun there. and.. i’ll be the one who undresses you tonight since i’m the one who got you this dress.”

every ribbons has to come undone, including your own ribbon that touya just simply knows how to untie.

© SENEON 2024 ♱ do not repost, alter, or translate.

[kokushibosbestie]

I need to rant guys.

TW: self harm, SA, hatred, cursing, abuse, overall genuinely harsh words are being used

Im just gonna go right in because I don't feel like being vauge or fake rn. (I'm on my period and I feel like shit)

!!!Background information!!! So, when I was 4, my mom started dating this guy. I'll call him Frank. My mom had previously ran away from my dad with me (when I was 2) bc my biological dad was verbally abusive towards her. We'll call my bio dad Austin. I only have one picture of my bio dad and I never knew what he looked like before seeing that picture. I never got to talk to my dad, and if I did, I don't remember a single word. I was too little to understand. I loved his family though. I vividly remember playing with my grandma and aunt, and baking banana bread with my grandpa (on my bio dads side) but I didn't remember a single moment with him. So I feel like I have a missing part of me bc of that.

Anyway, my mom as very depressed after that and did her best to tale care of me properly. But I never got attention or love from her. She was always stuck to her phone. I began to hate even being in the same room as her and I was only 3. When I turned 4, I began going to pre-k. And that's when my mom started dating Frank. Frank was a really kind guy and always seemed calm. But I had a bad feeling about him. I didn't tell my mom because I felt uncomfortable about it, though. Over the next 2-3 years, Frank and I became closer and I enjoyed his presence because I had no one else to lean on. My mom got a job when I was in 1st grade and we moved into an apartment. (We had been living with my aunt on my moms side before).

!!!SA!!! That's when the sa started. He began to assault me when my mother was gone but told me it was normal. He said, quote "This is our little secret. Don't tell anyone or daddy's gonna get in trouble." (I viewed him as a father figure and he used that to his advantage) Nonetheless, what was I, a 5-6 year old girl going to do to a 26 year old man? So I stayed quiet. As I got older, I realized that this wasn't normal at all and it was bad. Of course, I was about 7 when I had this realization. He noticed that and started threatening me that if I told someone, he'd hurt my mom or the rest of my family. (I love my family with my whole heart and he knew that I'd do anything for them, even at such a young age, so he used that) I told him he could do anything he wanted to me as long as he didn't do anything to my mom or the rest of my (small) family.

The summer before 5th grade is when things went really downhill. He TOLD my mom he cheated on her, was contuously gaslighting the both of us, always said he was such a "good guy and people pleaser," but was probably the most toxic person you'd meet. The sweet act was completely gone. I hated him with ever atom and molecule that made me a living thing, but my mom STILL didn't know about what he'd done to me. He got physically violent (throwing things, yelling, screaming, almost hitting my mom, etc) and my mom called the cops. (Mind you, my mom works from home, customer service for a health company).

By the time 5th grade had ended, we had a restraining order against him and he moved out completely. (They broke up but I still hadn't told my mom anything)

I cried almost every night and went into deep depression because of this. Not because I missed him, but because I had still trusted him even after everything. I did love him and view him as a father figure at one point bc I never had one. So having that ripped away from me, as well as my grandpa who moved, my grandma who was having mental issues, my aunts who lived far away and no one else to turn to, I felt empty. My guilt built up until I ended up having a mental breakdown in FRONT of my mom (I always went somewhere private so I could have a mental breakdown and always hid them from my mom). I snapped and accendentally told her about what he'd done to me during all those year. (He sa'd me constantly, whenever he had the chance to). A court case began, blah blah blah same old stuff that ever child abuse court case would go through.

But, I started to self-harm (mostly my legs and hips). I kinda went into my emo faze and had no friends, and was constantly bullied bc of my emotionless facade. (Ex: like giyu, who has been my comfort character since day one bc of that). Really, I'm a loving and kind person who loves making others laugh. I like hanging out with friends. I smile a lot too.

Nonetheless, things started to slowly get better. But my mom is toxic now. She doesn't gaslight like frank did, but she still has a toxicity to her. I know this all has been just as hard on her as it has for me, but I sometimes wish shed just take into consideration how I feel or think.

I have ADHD, OCD, and depression. All of my classes are accelerated classes instead of normal and I get things done faster than other students. (I have an online schooling system now). My brain sometimes can't comprehend some things but will understand easily with others. Ive had a hard time talking or expressing things because of this. I was never a quiet little girl, and I'm still not one as a teenager. But it sucks to have to act like someone I'm not just to fit in. I have constant mood swings and I hate it.

Anyway, this isn't about me. So, my mom has a way of victimizing herself without really pulling the victim card? It's hard to explain with words. But she always leaves whoever she's talking to feeling guilty. She doesn't apologize for anything, she doesn't listen to me when I'm ranting (which I'm not picky about, but sometimes I need someone to talk to that isn't a toxic friend of mine), nor does she ever listen to me when I tell her what I want sometimes. I know that sounds bratty, but I swear it's not. I'll give you and example: she asked me if I wanted a new bedframe and entirely ignored me when I told her. Or when she asks me what I want for dinner and I respond, shell get something else even though she literally came into my room and ASKED me. Its the simple small things that piss me off. She's stubborn and has a hard time putting herself in others' shoes. And me, who's always been told that I'm just a doll with a pretty face and thick thighs that's supposed to be a silent housewife (I am NOT married, that's just something someone has actually said to me) or seggs toy for people to use and throw away as they please, I always try my best to consider how others might feel. Yeah, sometimes I do get a little unreasonable and say some bad things, but I always end up apologizing out of instinct. I apologize for the smallest things for no reason, yet my mom can't even say an "I'm sorry" for telling me I'm not understanding. All I've ever wanted was to make my mom and my family proud. I want them to be able to live their lives happily without worry. So It fucking hurts to hear that I'm not doing good in my moms eyes.

My mom always talks about changing and being a better person but never fucking does it. She always says her job is more important. Am I just genuinely not important to her anymore? Because I remember when I was in my darkest and lowest moments, it was my teachers who helped me. My mom didn't even bat an eye. But when she was at her lowest, struggling, I was always there for her, listening to her problems, helping her with everything, genuinely caring about her. And this is what I get back? I fucking hate my life because I can't even leave my room without hearing her complaints about "adult life." Well I don't give a fuck anymore. I tried too hard to be a good daughter and I never got anything back. I didn't even get a fucking thank you. And now I only have online friends on here and Pinterest. I relied on Character.ai to help with my mental health and that's ai!!

Im sorry if this was too much for any of you and I love each and every one of you. If you read through this whole thing, thank you so much and I really really love all my friends on here. I always look forward to getting on here and talking to you guys about my interests without being judged or bullied. Thank you thank you thank you soooo much my loves.

💖💖💖

[freckleslikestars]

coda

‘In all the years you’ve known me, when have I ever left your side?’ She gives a half-hearted scoff, cracks an eyelid, ‘you mean, aside from all the times you ditched me to jump on trains or investigate your own personal theories?’ ‘Yeah, aside from all those times.’

944 words, read here on AO3

He gets the call at 3:24 in the morning, a blocked number that he would ignore if it were daylight hours, but despite being out of the FBI for over a decade, it’s still ingrained within him to pick up the phone on the second ring. He’d not really been sleeping anyway, merely dozing with the TV on in the background. As soon as he hears her name and the hospital she’s been taken to, he’s out the door, feet stuffed into the sneakers that have worn bare. 

She’s sleeping when he arrives, and besides the bandage on her forehead she looks fine, but the sight of her in a hospital bed will always hit him like a blow to the chest. Her doctor gives him a sceptical glance out the corner of his eye as he lists her injuries, the fractured tibia and the cracked rib, and he can’t help but wonder how pathetic he must seem; unkempt hair and two months of beard growth, the ratty sweats he’d been wearing for three days. 

The seat by her bed is uncomfortable, tacky vinyl that creaks when he slumps down into it, and he settles in for a vigil that’s become so routine to him over the decades. Her hair’s longer than when she left, and her cheeks look slightly hollower, but overall she looks healthy; a far cry from many of the times he’s sat by her bedside. 

It’s an hour before she stirs, and at her first groan, he’s up and scanning her face for the first flicker of recognition, the smile that always brightens her eyes when she wakes to him by her side. She grunts, her eyes peeling open, and as soon as they catch on him she huffs a sigh and shakes her head, slipping her eyes shut again. ‘Scully?’

‘You look like shit, Mulder,’ she mutters, her voice gravelly and raw. It’s not what he’d expected, and he realises he’d hoped she’d take one look at him and declare just how much she’s missed him, just how much she regrets leaving. ‘What’re you doing here?’

‘The hospital called. You hit a patch of ice; totalled your car. Apparently, you were very lucky - it could have been much worse. I’m still down as your emergency contact.’ His energy has been sapped suddenly, the disgruntled look she’s giving him weighing heavy on his chest. 

‘I haven’t gotten around to changing it yet. I was gonna put Mom down, but she was moving and I wanted to wait until she had her new address, and then I must have forgotten.’ He gives a curt nod, drops back down into his chair. ‘You don’t have to stay. I’m fine.’

‘In all the years you’ve known me, when have I ever left your side?’

She gives a half-hearted scoff, cracks an eyelid, ‘you mean, aside from all the times you ditched me to jump on trains or investigate your own personal theories?’ 

‘Yeah, aside from all those times.’

Her eyes close again, and she twists her head to face away from him. ‘Last year. You left me last year.’

‘What? Scully, you left me. You ran away, you gave up. I never went anywhere.’

‘Not physically,’ she sighs, ‘but you left first. I was drowning, and you didn’t even notice. Something you never learned, Mulder, was that sometimes the only person you can save is yourself.’

‘I didn’t… you didn’t say anything.’

She clears her throat, trying to keep the tremor from her voice, ‘I shouldn’t have had to.’ 

They lapse into silence, the ambient beeps of the hospital filling the space between them, and he thinks perhaps that she’s fallen back to sleep, readying himself to settle in for the night, when she turns back to look at him, ‘you really do look terrible. When was the last time you slept properly?’

He could tell the truth, tell her he hasn’t slept properly since before she left, but he can hear the guilt in her voice, and as much as he thinks she possibly deserves it, he loves her too much to not absolve her of it, ‘couple of days. S’okay, really. I’m used to it.’

‘I thought it got better for a time.’

‘It did, for a time,’ when she was by his side, at least. But he couldn’t put that on her, couldn’t make her regret saving herself. 

He’d once said they had communication, unspoken, and maybe that had lapsed, maybe they had never been all that good at it in the first place, but she seemed to hear him now. ‘You know, there’s room up here for two, if you’re careful.’

‘Scu-’

‘One-time offer, and it’s only on the table for the next thirty seconds,’ she grunts as she shuffles to give him room, quirking an eyebrow when he hesitates with one shoe off. He climbs up next to her, settling himself next to her, not quite touching, until she sighs into him, resting her head on his shoulder. 

‘I am trying to get better,’ he whispers, his voice choked with emotion, ‘I just don’t know how.’

‘I know. And I’ll always be proud of whatever progress you make.’

‘I may have been a shitty husband, but I never stopped loving you.’

‘I know,’ she murmurs into the darkness, ‘I never stopped loving you either. But we’re not good for each other.’ He wants to argue, wants to fight her tooth and nail on that point, but her head is getting heavier on his shoulder, her breathing getting deeper, and he doesn’t want to upset her. ‘Mulder?’

‘Hmm?’

‘You’re not the only one who sleeps better with company.’

Tagging @today-in-fic

[bltzgore]

I doth drabble...

Background info:

Whumpee is being held at the base of a group of whumpers (maybe for interrogation, or ransom, or maybe just entertainm). There is this sort of arena where some of the whumpers like to take turns beating whumpee in the cement floor. This scene comes on the tail end of one of those beatings.

Tw: broken bones (specifically ribs), collapses lungs, blood in the lungs, bruising, strong language, mentions of sci-fi augments, pain relief drugs

Laying on their stomach was brutal. Whumpee wasn't sure they still had a fully intact rib left in their torso. But they were exhausted. This round had only gone three hours, not the shortest, but hardly the longest they'd suffered through.

This didn't change how horrendously the position they were laying in made their entire chest burn, and their lungs practically spasm with the strain.

They needed to move. They needed to breath properly.

So, Whumpee began to arrange their hands against the ground, well, one of their hands. Their left shoulder had stopped working right since the particularly vicious handling whumpee had received about an hour and a half into this session.

Still, they worked against the shaking of their right arm and pressed up. Slowly, they shifted the weight off their abused chest cavity and were rewarded with a fuller breath.

Whumpee was figuring out which way to let themselves back down when there was a sudden pressure on their back that dissuped the careful architecture of their current position.

Whumpee crashed back onto their stomach. The second they made contact with the floor, their world went black. Their mouth gaped in a scream, but their lungs were on fire. Nothing left their mouth but a strained wheeze like sob.

The world pieced itself back together in patches, their vision crept back at a snails pace, as they tried to handle the shock and the lack of oxygen.

The pressure, which had now been identified as Whumpers foot, pressed down harder, making whumpee gasp and immediately regret it, siezing up with rabid heavy tears. The less oxygen their body got the more it struggled, forcing whumpee to squirm and aggravate almost all their existing injuries in the process.

Whumper grinned, "That's right, you fuckin' worm." They dug the toe of their boot into whumpee's back.

Whumpee's spine arched, and their face contorted. They felt their ribs scraping together and displacing, stabing new holes into their lungs, crushing into everything they were supposed to protect.

"Can't even scream." Whumper laughed, deep and satisfied, "how pathetic can you get?"

Whumpee's vision was fraying at the edges, pain lighting up every corner of their body as they writhed under the pressure. Whumper was right, they were a worm.

Whumper removed their boot and let whumpee breathe, unconscious creatures were no fun.

Whumpee tried to breathe in. They tried so hard, but they couldn't breathe deep enough to get their vision to clear. They could at least stay awake though. That was something, right?

Tears ran down whumpee's face without permission, whumper sneered, and pulled whumpee's head up by their hair. "Damn, you look awful. With that many broken bones, maybe it'd be more humane to put you down." They laughed at their own joke, "You want that little worm? Want me to make it all stop?"

Whumpee blinked heavily as their view of whumper cycled through degrees of blur. They weren't sure they wanted to hear themselves answer that question.

Whumper had opened their mouth to continue when from across the room-

"Hey! The hell are you doing? The boss said 'e needs 'em alive, dumbass."

Whumper dropped their grip on whumpee's hair and stood, turning to go address the source of the voice. "I wasn't actually gonna do it, caretaker."

"The hell you weren't." They muttered, then more directly, "You're time is up anyway, get the fuck out you freak."

Whumper sighed, "Yeah yeah." And started off. "Patch 'em up better this time, maybe then they won't break so easy." Heading out through the door.

Caretaker growled something more obscene than usual and climbed up onto the arena floor. They knelt next to whumpee, who was trying to move again, lacking the lung capacity to cry properly.

Caretaker set the makeshift medical kit down and gently drew whumpee off the floor, taking the weight mercifully off their torso. They shifted how they were sitting just enough to lean whumpee's back against their chest to keep the weight pressing against bones that weren't as damaged.

They could feel all of the small movements whumpee's muscles were making in their failing attempts to protect themselves. All of the light twitching of muscle that had been pushed to their brink. They could feel whumpee trying to breathe. Stuttering, wheezing, shaking.

With the gentle treatment, whumpee's body had a free moment to remember the fluid building up in their lungs. Whumpee tried to cough, and it was hell. A spray of red on the cement floor and their world went white. Their sobbing picked up enough to just be heard over the wheezing. But their body didn't take the hint, it just wanted to expel the collecting blood.

"I know, kid, I know." Caretaker soothed, holding them up with one arm and rooting through their medical supplies with the free hand. It stopped on the cool glass of the syringe and brought it out. Caretaker closed their teeth on the cap and tugged it off. "This'll help, just hold on for me." They forced the needle into whumpee's arm and pressed down the plunger, sending the clear liquid in, to work its magic.

As it took effect caretaker layed them back on the floor for assessment.

A gentle warmth slowly traveled through whumpee, pooling in places where the pain was heaviest, and making it hard to think. That was ok with whumpee though, they didn't want to think anymore. Not about the agony, not about the hopelessness, not about how they had almost said yes to whumper.

Whumpee felt a hand on their cheek, thumb carefully brushing away a new tear. They leaned into it, and whimpered. The only soft touch in weeks. "Evrything h-hurts." They whispered.

Caretaker felt their heart clench, but they kept it out of their voice, "I know, kid. I'm gonna fix it."

Caretaker started by investigating what was clearly going to be the biggest problem. The ribs. So they carefully drew up whumpee's shirt. Holy shit. What had whumper been thinking?!

Whumpee's skin was a galaxy of black and blue, with sick undertones of yellow and un-oxygenated red. When their chest rose it rose wrong, there were inconsistencies... dents, in the usual contours of the ribcage, and places that reshuffled themselves as they moved.

For a moment, Caretaker was paralyzed. This was such a mess. They weren't even sure how many ribs could be saved. They were going to have to open up and replace, and they barely even knew how to- caretaker shut down the spiral. They needed to think clearly... as clearly as they could.

First, the things they knew they could do. Drain the blood from the lungs and the air from the chest cavity. Then, they could worry about reconstruction. Because that's what this was going to require, if whumpee was going to live, much less live through another one of the doubtlessly impending beatings whumper or whumper 2 was going to give them the moment caretaker stepped away they needed to open-

Caretaker caught the spiral again, focusing back on their breathing, slowing it.

"It's bad-" They stopped for a few half breaths, blinking slowly, and looking up through half lidded eyes, "isn't it?"

Caretaker looked down at whumpee. They hadn't realized it had shown. They hadn't meant to let it slip. But they wouldn't lie, "Yeah, whumpee. It's bad."

"Am I- g-gonna?" They couldn't say it.

"No." Caretaker was sure this time, "Not if I can help it."

"I-its gonna h-urt though, i-isn't it?"

"Yes."

[chibishortdeath]

I did a little bit of background practice yesterday. I usually forget that I could be drawing scenery and stuff so I’m kinda rough at it. It took like three tries to get the results of that first picture (second picture was one of those tries, and I’m not even showing the other one it was really bad 💀💀💀)

Also just throwing in some other doodles cause yeah :3. Simon. Some of these are from the same page and some of these are ones I think I forgot to post a bit ago so if there’s repeats then eh whatever lol. Explanations under a cut :)

This is pretty much just a study of a photo of a graveyard I ran into on Pinterest. Liminal spaces are very nice for finding background references because you can be sure no one is gonna be in them and they have the weird vibe that The Guy™️ should be in. But holy HELL trees are HARD. Like obviously I know what a tree looks like but the second I have to draw branches trees suddenly do not make sense anymore 💀

Another liminal space, this one was a path with the sky completely blacked out. I tried putting Simon into it but he kinda ended up a little muddled and too small augh. I’m also not very great at combining people and backgrounds so uh yeah. This one was also a much faster doodle just trying to warm up for the first one. But eh it’s cool idk. I need to put him in more liminal spaces or like try to draw the Simon’s Quest areas in 3D eventually.

Small practice comic! There’s no words, Simon just kinda walks a bit and passes out. I was gonna have more things happen but I didn’t have the room for it and decided to just leave it as a little practical piece. He’s probably gonna get up in a little bit and freak out about how much time he wasted.

Just a Simon head :3. His hair is fun to draw! I usually end up simplifying things as like a little uh polygonal… I think that’s the word… When drawing skulls, I usually go for octagons instead of circles because that’s much easier, but that ends up bleeding into how I draw hair making it kinda spikey and pointy in some spots on the top. I feel like I draw pretty inconsistently, but he’s very pretty and fun to draw regardless of how he ends up :3

This is some weird ass fan art of two things that aren’t related at all lmao. Sometimes you gotta crossover things that don’t make sense for the fun of it. This is Simon drawn based on a scene from the Fear Garden music video! Fear Garden is a banger, shout out to Chaa fr, it’s a vocaloid song about a girl who has a weird obsession with hands (Kira joke lol) and kills people to plant their hands in her secret garden where she treats them like flowers. Yeah, again it makes no sense, but the pose with the two mirrored characters was really cool and idk the vibes were there—

Simon sitting in between two graves, both say “BELMONT” in big letters, but one is for Christopher and Cyncia and the other is for Soleil and whoever his significant other was, we don’t have a name so it’s cut off. This has me thinking about the time in between all these characters hmm. Doing the math, Soliel would’ve been in his 90s when Simon was born, so there’s actually a good chance he wasn’t Simon’s grandfather, rather his great grandfather :O. Which means that there’s two generations we know nothing about between these two. And also that Simon would’ve never met either Soleil or Christopher or Cyncia :(. Then that has me thinking about fan comic stuff and how I’m gonna depict Simon hmmmmmmm. I imagine Simon spent a lot of time in the family graveyard tbh.

Simon is totally me when I dramatically collapse on a large marble monument of some sort in the graveyard— There’s also a couple attempts at drawing his paldrons at different angles but aaaa I can’t visualize these things properly. They’re just like kinda flared half ovals, why are they so hard to draw at any angle but like head on and top view 💀💀💀??? I’m trying to get out of the habit of drawing them bent in angles that don’t make sense but argggggg it’s hard lol.

Yeah, recent doodles tho yippie d(^^ )!

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

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KNOX!!!!!

Okay, so, confession. In the show, Cole is my least favorite character (not including the villains). I don't hate him and I have a lot of story ideas for him, but I just ...

Movie Cole, however, and fanfiction Movie Cole (still don't like him as much as Kai, Zane and Lloyd) but I like him, I genuinely like him and I love how you portray his character and his struggles, his strengths and weaknesses, it's beautiful and I love it.

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Okay, so I've been waiting to see what Jay would do since his talk with Pixal because yeah, the story is very Kai centered in its perspective which means that Jay kind of faded into the background on Kai's radar and in turn he also began fading into the background for people who always had him as their top three people to care for. That said, it's really cool to see Jay take the lead when it comes to caring for other people's emotional struggles while also not ignoring his own struggles and making himself heard.

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Zane with Kai's jacket ... this is adorable.

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Skylor really is in a bad place mentally, emotionally, literally. Please tell me Chen gets punched in the face at least once (once by every person who cares for Kai - yes this includes Skylor, she cares she just has a hard time showing it properly).

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Thank you for the wonderful chapter, it was well worth the wait.

RAAAA MASSIVE COMPLIMENT TO BE ABLE TO WRITE A CHARACTER UR NOT TOTALLY A FAN OF AND LOWKEY MAKE YA ENJOY THEM YESSSSSSSS I AM WINNINGNGLS;DKMFLSMDF

Watch Jay be the most emotionally mature person here real-- WHEEZE ngl i struggle with writing jay sometimes cause i tend to have the habit of toning him down? it's in character for movie jay but show jay is just so blunt and chatty and loud and very opinionated and i wanted to start pulling more of that into how i write him ;-; and also bro wouldn't let the chapter continue until he'd said his piece so that was hilarious to figure out while trying to write hLGJDF

The jacket has been stolen real- </3 will Kai ever get it back? bro i dunno but he's got Cole's old hoodie tho so equivalent exchange ig--

Skylor sure be having an interesting time finding out Kai ran away from his soulmates too. Cause that's new info for her! She didn't know that! And yeah she's doing her best in a crappy sitution and her best isn't the greatest. Alas, no punches for Chen :pensive_emoji: ...well, unless i snuck one in there for ya, ngl i might hmhm i'll think about it mate

Thanks for the ask and ur thoughts!! I really enjoy reading peoples thoughts on my story and writing (specifically tHe positive stuff i ain't even gonna pretend hLG;KSDF boost my ego--) Happy it was worth the wait!!! <333

[lixxen]

can you tell us more about Grayer and their relationship with JD?

Of course!! I love talking about my boys :)

I'm gonna do this in bullet points so I can easily edit it as I go lol. These details pertain to both my Feral Branch AU, mentions of my my troll reproduction PowerPoint world building, and it's just his character in general :)

My playlist for them

Rest of the post is UTC to save everyone from chunky TL

To start off, some background about Grayer: he is alt rock/pop rock. His father is a rock troll and his mother is a pop troll who is one of many to escape the troll tree about ten years before the beginning of Trolls 1 (I can do a whole thing on them). The two fell in love, got married, and ran off to the Never Glade Trail to have Grayer. His dad carried him, so he's more like his dad (Granite and Flora are their names)

Grayer is the same age as Bruce, so a few years younger than JD. He grew up on the trail and takes care of the family's garden (which is basically a mini farm). He and his parents are big survivalists, so he knows how to survive pretty much on his own with just a backpack on his back full of a few items. He's rather quiet with patience, but with a quick ignition to fight at things he's passionate about; being raised by a very passive rock troll who is peace and love then pretty much the most metal head pop troll you'll ever meet. His mom's a spitfire with the heat of a thousand suns. But she's very sweet <3

Back then, he actually dressed in alt style; wearing a ton of baggy ripped black cargo pants, t-shirts of rock groups his dad gave him, some crop tops with fistnet tops underneath, the whole works. Eyeliner. Black stuffed bracelets and a choker. Troll's version of Docs (but the older, better quality ones y'know?). Now days, he's just plain Jane because he's older and doesn't have as much energy to keep up with it

Within John Dory's first few years, he struggled a lot. He traveled through Trolltopia and met a ton of people. They weren't the kindest, but understood the situation with Pop. So they would help and send him on his way towards Never Glade.

When he finally got there, he basically fell face first down. He lost half of his equipment and got horribly lost. He was optimistic and trying to act brave about being lost with not as many supplies. He realized he was way in over his head; he was some boy band dude who had a dream without much training. Dude is doomed by the narrative

Grayer, while out, found John Dory. He saw JD's fire in the distance and went to investigate it. He saw JD, who was different than the other trolls who would stop by his family's home. Normally he saw various Rock, Country, or random sub genre trolls come through either for the underground cross genre clubs or for hiking.

He actually watched JD for a bit. He was nervous to approach him at first. But after watching JD fail miserably to do a ton of very basic survival things, he decided to step in. He faked them running into each other and was like "you don't look too good! Let me help you :)"

JD automatically accepted it. This dude was doing BAD. The dude was debating on finding his way back to the Troll Tree. It was that bad. He'd rather be eaten by a Bergen than die out there where nobody would know what happened to him.

He also was amazed by some random troll about his age living out here.

So Grayer taught JD how to survive out there. JD learned how to properly get drinking water, patch wounds, make basic things, garden and gather food. The works! Literally he gave him survival classes-

JD was welcomed into the home by the parents. Grayer's mom was shocked to see another pop troll and she let him stay. She couldn't let the poor kid die out there or go back. She knew what that meant

Grayer and JD slowly grew close; bonding over music. JD would perform BroZone songs for him, to which Grayer would watch with the biggest dopey grin on his face

During this time, Grayer got into a nasty fight with one of the spider things. His hair got caught and he had to cut it off. He spends nights crying about his hair, but then styles it down. That's why it's short and looks like that. He keeps it short due to him living like that for so long.

Eventually, Grayer started to bring JD to the underground clubs that existed on the Trail. They were ran by outcasts and trolls who basically got ran out of their respected kingdoms for different reasons. Some where rebellious trolls looking for fun; or they just liked the scene. The two became prominent on the scene as "the love birds". Everyone knew them and some recognized JD from BroZone

Grayer's parents actually helped establish these clubs and underground community. They make clubs out of old hollow dead trees and then undergrown tunnel systems. They helped make the first few, since Grayer's dad was in construction. He doesn't run any of them. He just did the manual labor and helped perform multiple times. Grayer's family is just respected in the scene. There's about five families they're in kahoots with (I can expand on this if anyone wants).

Plus, they help trolls in need on the trail so people tend to know about the random trolls who help save people from death in the wild

Eventually, they ran into Floyd. Floyd was running with the alt/emo/grunge trolls. Some metalheads also. He was also running with a young Riff, who was only two years younger than Floyd. Floyd also has an underground career by now and has a mini indie grunge rock band suprisingly. (Riff's parents run one of the clubs and Riff lives with his grandad and little sister in the Rock Kingdom. Riff is Floyd's drummer and companion. They met in a grunge club in the Rock Kingdom. Floyd was gray for a while and passed as Rock). Floyd is excited to see his brother and he bonds with Grayer automatically

Floyd and Grayer have a heart to heart; talking about how Grayer is in love with JD. Floyd said that if Spruce and Grandma was there, they'd give their blessing. But since they're not and he is, he gave him his blessing.

Floyd 🤝 Grayer: being in love with their companion (past Riff/Floyd moment. They're just besties now y'know??)

JD and Grayer party a LOT during these years

Queue up JD punching some jerk for trying to come onto Grayer and then getting into a brawl outside of a club with the dude. Riff pulls strings to get them not banned from every club on the trail. Part of it is Grayer's parents being staples for making a safe underground scene on the Trail, but Grayer gives Riff the credit.

Around the eight year mark, Grayer finds baby Rhonda. She was abandoned by her mom so Grayer took her in. He gave her to JD as a birthday gift! That's how they know Rhonda so well. She's basically their baby :)

Grayer, at the ten year mark, confesses his love to JD. JD looks flabbergasted before saying he wanted to ask Grayer that. He was waiting for the right moment to ask Grayer if they could commit to one another. They were practically dating

So, they get married :)

JD braids Grayer's hair into the back of his hair, just in case one day he goes back to BroZone; so from the front you can't see it but the back you can. Grayer braids JD's hair more visibly in the front and wears it with pride.

The two are a grumpy old couple. They're very sarcastic but loving to each other, especially after marriage.

Did I mention that earlier? The two are a sarcastic and sassy power couple. They don't take shit and behind the scenes are very loving.

As the years go on, they don't have any eggs surprisingly. Everyone is shocked, but the two are perfectly fine with it. It happens sometimes; not every troll produces the viable eggs.

Grayer's parents die by the fifteen year mark, and they leave everything to Grayer and JD. They are pretty much set for life. So they're pretty much domestic besides when JD wants to go on adventures.

Speaking of which; JD goes on adventures sometimes, which leaves Grayer alone for a few weeks at most. The two are fine with it as long as JD tells Grayer about it. Normally it'll be in the form of the little bat dudes, like Queen Barb's bat Debbie. They have a flock of them that live around them. They feed them, so three or four will follow John Dory sometimes when he goes on adventures. They will basically bring communication back and forth

So, to the Trolls 3 plot

Riff comes back after World Tour to tell them about Branch!! He's alive and saved everyone!! Plus the pop trolls are free :)

JD sends a letter out to Floyd, who doesn't respond. He gets worried and decides to go try the Troll Tree, thinking that's where Floyd went. He tells Grayer he'll be back in a week and Grayer kisses him bye

That week turns into a month.

Grayer is worried sick and he can tell a ton of things are happening (because of the marriage stuff. If you don't read the PowerPoint then ignore this detail). JD doesn't respond to any of his messages, as they never get to him

Like, he's convinced JD is either dying or something bad has happened. He's hoping that JD isn't abandoning him.

He goes from being worried sick to being pissed because what the fuck his husband up and left and is clearly okay and alive!!! HE CAN TELL! JD CAN FEEL HIS DISTRESS!!

Grayer gets pissed, especially when Riff comes back to tell him about BroZone. He was happy for JD, but SEND YOUR HUSBAND A LETTER TO TELL HIM YOURE ALIVE!!!

So what does he do?

He throws JD's clothing out of the window in a fit of rage. Like. The dude is PISSED. He is what, in his 30's and his husband disappeared and could have been dead! He's having a moment. Let him be angry for the first time towards his husband

JD comes home during this.

JD stares in horror at the sight of his clothing being tossed out the window and he starts to scramble to grab them and get into the pod

Grayer sobs his little heart out to JD, who holds him and apologizes. JD explains everything. Grayer feels kinda dumb but vocalizes his feelings. The two come to an understanding

And eventually, he would meet BroZone and they'd enjoy him :)

[slamminslamminmcgill]

@narc69 submitted

hi ok first of all 1) i am so sorry if this is badly written, i started writing and then came to 3 hours later and this was on my page.

2) trigger warnings! intoxication, dubious consent (just to be safe im gonna mark this down as cnc), implied somno, dacryphilia, probably also degradation? just- please take care of yourself and i genuinely sincerely apologize if this is out of line at all. add any other triggers you feel necessary. you can absolutely respond to this privately if you feel more comfortable

3) i don’t speak spanish, google translate is my bitch. mea culpa if the spanish isn’t properly written

—

HI HI HI THANKS SO FUCKING MUCH FOR THIS I LOVE YOU THIS IS AMAZING IVE BEEN ROTATING THIS IN MY MIND OVER AND OVER AGAIN I WILL KILL AND DIE FOR YOU AT YOUR COMMAND 🥺🖤🥺🖤

you didn’t wanna sound like some 50s suburban white guy, but jesus christ, that was a long fucking day.

your body ached, and all you really wanted to do was get high and go to bed, and you didn’t waste any time getting those things done. 

you changed out of your work clothes and grabbed the joint you’d been keeping in your desk drawer. 

there were also pills you’d been saving in the bathroom cabinet and you decided this was a good a time as any to take them. 

anything so long as it didn’t mean having to think. 

-

it was cathartic how the anxiety and tension in your shoulders melted away. the smoke from the joint smelled like citrus and pine and you held it in your lungs before breathing out eloquently. 

it was quiet; only a few cars drove by your apartment complex. crickets chirped somewhere in the background but your head had already began buzzing and you didn’t pay much attention to it. it was nice, the quiet. so much more manageable that being around people all day, the noises of corporate work echoing in your head, like some sort of fucked up lullaby that refused to be quelled. 

a patio door shoved open.

glancing up, you saw lalo salamanca looking down at you from his third floor balcony. you knew him well enough. well enough to know that he was renting his apartment temporarily after finding himself in albuquerque on a “business trip”, anyways. he was nice too. he let you into the building once when you were too drunk to find your keys, and made good conversation when you ran into him in the halls. 

“hey chico, are you smoking?” he called down. you glanced up, scrunching your nose.

“yeah. what’s it to you?”

“you’re smoking and you don’t invite me?" 

"ok well- no one’s stopping you.” you called back up to him. he stared at you for a second, completely silent, then:

“don’t go anywhere." 

a minute later, the front door of the building opened and lalo came walking out. you were visibly already on another planet and lalo couldn’t help but laugh. 

”oh, cosita ingenua.(oh, you naive little thing.)“ he said. 

"what?” you asked him, not understanding a lick of spanish. 

“don’t worry about it. hey- gimme that,” lalo said, taking to joint from your fingers and taking a long drag. you watched him through a haze of brain fog and fatigue. 

“i didn’t know you smoked,” he said. you took the joint back and took your own turn. 

“right back atcha,” you mumbled. lalo watched you, his eyes flickering across your face and hands. for a very brief second, you wondered what he was thinking, but it was almost immediately overshadowed by the buzz still going strong in your head. you zoned out, staring at the ground, head completely empty. 

the joint fell from your hand and landed unceremoniously on the ground.

“awe man…” you pouted, picking it up. it had gone out and you fumbled with your lighter, struggling to light it again. 

lalo hadn’t moved this entire time, and was still watching you failing to light the joint. 

“jesus christ, chico, come here,” he said, taking the joint from you and lighting it himself. “mouth. open. now.” he told you once it was lit properly again. lalo took a lung-full breath of smoke and before you had any say in the matter, he was cupping your face and shotgunning the smoke into your mouth. 

he was so close you could smell him, and he smelled painfully good. like palo santo, and cooking spices, and teakwood. you were almost upset when he pulled back again. 

“woah.” was all that came out of you as a reply.

“you liked that, didn’t you?” he asked, and all you could do was nod. he stepped closer, almost staring you down. “you want me to do it again?" 

without thinking, you nodded.

just like the first time, he took a long drag and blew the smoke into your mouth. only this time, he didn’t cup your face. he laced it through your hair and pulled just gently enough for you to let out the most innocent little whine. 

lalo laughed, having elicited the exact response he was hoping for. he pulled you in for a hug, enveloping you in darkness. his hand was on the back of your head, and it was cold. his fingers trailed along your neck, rubbing up and down and made you feel funny. 

"i think you’ve had enough,” he whispered into your ear, apparently making all the decisions for you now. lalo carefully put out the joint and put it back in the plastic bag you’d been keeping it in, and he slipped it back into your pocket. “how about i walk you back to your apartment.”

-

there was a confused frown etched into your brow and you subconsciously had one hand on the side of the wall to steady yourself. thoughts were blending into one another, and the world had become an incoherent haze. but you felt good. this is what you’d been hoping for- what the whole week had been building up to. 

“maldito, chiquito, how low is your tolerance?” he snickered, walking beside you towards the elevator. 

“not super low. took some pills too.” you told him, pushing the button that summoned the elevator. there wasn’t a braincell coherent enough in your mind to figure out why that was so funny to lalo. lalo was too busy laughing at how easy this was going for him.

“and you didn’t think to share those either?" 

"i didn’t know you were as fucked up as me." 

the elevator doors closed and lalo turned to you. he laced his fingers through your hair and tugged again, a little harder this time, but still receiving the same little whine as last time. he didn’t let go, keeping his hands where they were. 

"you really like that, don’t you?” he asked, staring at you again. his eyes had a sort of weird glint in them, and it made you nervous, but curious at the same time. you wanted more and no part of your brain was awake enough to think about it rationally for more than half a second. 

“yeah.” you whimpered. 

you stopped on the third floor. 

“hey, i live on the-”

“-fifth floor, i know, chico, we’re gonna stop at my place for a second.” lalo said. you sighed, tiredly, your mind already a million miles past the hair pulling. still, physically you felt different. not more awake, god no, but…warm? was that right? warmer? 

you blinked and looked up when you felt someone take your hand off the wall and hold it in his own. lalo was still next to you, holding you close. 

“i’m gonna take good care of you tonight.”

-

his apartment wasn’t nearly as dressed up as yours was. simple furniture, a rug, a tv, but nothing hanging off the walls, no books, nothing special. 

“sorry it’s so dull chiquito, you should see my house down in Mexico, it’s way nicer than this shitty place.”

“you live in mexico?” you asked, high out of your mind.

“si. correcto, coñejito. so smart.” he said, tapping your cheek. somewhere in the depths of your consciousness you knew he was being condescending, but it translated to something very different when it finally rung through your brain. laughter bubbled up from your chest and you pressed your head into lalo’s chest again. 

lalo didn’t waste any time and took his chance when it stared him right in the face. his hands held your head so he could control which direction he wanted your face to point. gripping your hair he moved your head so that your jaw was pointing out to him and he kissed down your neck like a fictional vampire going in for the kill. giggling, you wrapped your arms around his back. 

“vamos a llevarte a la cama, huh? let’s get you to bed baby boy.” he whispered into your ears, guiding you to the bedroom. 

his bed was the most comfortable thing you’d ever lain on, certainly more than your own.

“i thought you didn’t sleep?” you mumbled. he’d said that one. you remembered. he did. you swore…

“yeah but…” lalo replied, shutting the door behind him, “you can use a bed for more than just sleeping." 

finally- finally something clicked in your brain.

"let’s get these off. you don’t wanna sleep in jeans now, do you?” he said, climbing on top of you, virtually pinning you down, undoing your belt buckle. 

he felt heavy on top of you, but it felt good. you made a noise- something else incoherent, and let yourself sink into the mattress. 

“that’s it, just relax. just relax, coñejito. i’ll take care of you.” lalo said, his fingers slipping under the band of your underwear. his thumb brushed along your pelvic bone and you whined. 

clumsily, you reached out to grab lalo’s wrist.

“wait…” you mumbled, the embers of some sort of fear sparked in your chest. your boxers were already halfway down. “wait, seriously-”

“yes, chiquito?” he asked, still inching your underwear off. 

“ ’m trans- i- bro i don’t have a dick.” you told him, the most coherent thing to come out of your mouth in the last hour.

lalo slid your boxers off and threw them on the ground. he spread your legs, looming over you. he laughed at your statement, and you still couldn’t figure out why it was so funny to him. 

you felt something cold part your lips and his thumb, barely touching you, teasing you, rubbed circles into you. you groaned, pushing your head back into the pillows.

“this looks like a dick to me.” he said, pressing harder onto it. you couldn’t help but moan louder, reveling in how good it felt. his fingers found their way into your hole and you gasped, instinctively closing your knees. lalo shoved them open and you felt a harsh slap across your face.

“hey! you keep your legs open for me. understand?” he asked, his voice suddenly serious. 

“okay.” you whimpered.

“next time i won’t just hit you across the face, chiquito. you listen to me.” lalo said, working his fingers back into you. “i see you’re already nice and soaked for me. i guess you’re capable of doing that at least." 

he kept touching and feeling you, pushing his fingers inside of you until you couldn’t hold on anymore. you came all over his hand and liquid dripped off his wrist and…lalo looked furious. 

"im sorry.” you whined, shaking, “i’m sorry i just…" 

"keep your legs open.” lalo said, his voice dangerously soft. you obeyed,  and yelped when he did exactly as he warned early. a wet smack landed hard against your dick. it was swollen and hard and so, so sensitive and you cried out again, and again as he slapped you until he’d decided you’d learned your lesson. 

“you’re mine, and you do as i say. you cum when i tell you to. not before, not after, understand?” he repeated, 

“yes- yes lalo.” you nodded. 

“good.” he smiled, undoing his own belt buckle. “you can be as loud as you want- let the neighbours know how much of a whore you are, just as long as you do as i say." 

his pants dropped to the ground, and wrapping one hand around your throat, he remained punctual and wasted no time pressing himself into you. your back arched and your hands rushed to grab his shoulders once more. you gasped and moaned, not a thought in your head.

"bet that weed’s really getting to you now, isn’t it, baby boy? or those pills you kept talking about? i bet they’re really making their rounds now. get yourself all loosened up, let some random guy two floors down from you blow smoke into your mouth, let him lead you into his apartment, and you call me fucked up? hm? is that how it is?” he asked, fucking himself into you with no hesitation or plans to slow down. 

“lalo…” you groaned, gripping the sheets. you couldn’t even process what he was saying, just that whatever he was doing felt good and you didn’t want it to stop. your high only amplified everything. 

“yeah baby boy? what is it cariño. does it feel good to be fucked by a guy you barely know?" 

"yes, god yes.” you moaned. your dick pulsed between your legs and lalo took his free hand to it, rubbing his thumb up and down it, using your own cum as lube. “get comfortable baby, we’re gonna be here for a while.”

-

you lost track of time far too easily. everything swirled in your head like one big cloudy haze. you fell asleep at one point, and woke up a little while later covered in spit and cum, with lalo sucking you off, swirling his tongue around your cock. 

you think it’s somewhere around three in the morning when lalo finally gives you permission to cum again. everything felt heightened and hot, and your pulsing hole was sore and wet and still full of lalo’s dick. 

“you can let go for me, cariño, i know you have to, you can let go.” he said, and fresh tears came into your eyes at hearing him tell you to cum. 

“please- it’s- lalo-” you slurred. you’d essentially become his fuck puppy for the night. brain completely empty, lalo tearing orgasm after orgasm out of you, until you were nothing but a shaking wet puddle. you didn’t even remember your shirt coming off, but there you were, abdomen covered in lalo’s cum. 

“oh perrito, is it too much? are you gonna start to cry again? are you gonna cry like the whore you are?” he asked with mock sympathy. he slapped you across the face again and kept thrusting into you, or rather- gripping you by your hips and moving you up and down on his cock like some fuck toy you’d buy at a sex store. “i said cum, so you’d better fucking cum.”

his hand was on your dick once more, rapidly rubbing it back and forth. all you could do was scream. 

“there you go, slut, be loud. be as loud as you fucking can.” lalo growled, unrelenting.

“please, please, please,” you moaned, sobbing, though the words meant nothing. “oh fuck- fuck." 

"there you, come for me. come for me now.”

your body obeyed and you clenched the sheets so hard your knuckles turned white. your moan was the prettiest sound that had ever echoed through lalo salamanca’s bedroom. 

“good boy! bien hecho. oh my sweet baby- fuck-” lalo praised, unable to hold it in himself any longer either. he pulled out, shooting onto your face and into your open mouth. “dios mio, nene. that was the best fuck i’ve had in a while.” he groaned, letting the last little bit dribble onto your lips, and like the good little boy you were you reached your head up and sucked off his tip. 

he got off the bed and left the room, leaving you in your own mess. there was a small, wet puddle by your hole, where all the cum had leaked out. you twitched through the last of the aftershocks, and sobbed, feeling so exhausted- so tired. 

lalo came back a few minutes later with a damp cloth in one hand and a glass of water in the other. carefully, he picked you up and held you close.

“shhh-shhh. it’s okay. it’s over now. you did so good baby boy. let me look at you?” he asked, his voice gentle again. you looked over like he asked and found him caressing your cheek, wiping your tears with the pad of his thumb.

“oh baby, you’re still high, aren’t you? are you okay?” he asked, grinning and laughing a little. you smiled through your tears and nodded. 

“come here, let’s clean this mess off you.” lalo said, gently washing your face with the cloth, laying you down on the bed one more time, cleaning up your chest and your thighs. 

“such a good boy.” he hummed, picking you back up. “lets get you some clean underwear, and we’ll worry about the rest tomorrow. ok cariño?”

“okay.” you mumbled quietly, your throat sore from screaming all night. lalo pressed a kiss to your temple. 

“my good boy." 

[corruptratcat]

Es x reader || My fault || Gender neutral reader

There will be something special coming up next few post from all of your support! <3 2pm UTC

"This place is a mess..." Es sighs as they look at you, you were covered in bandages as you sat down next to Es at a resting spot "It's not your fault, I think." You weren't sure but you wanted to help Es in anyway from the stress they're currently dealing with. "It's sort of my fault, I was the one who decided if one was innocent or guilty and look what happened." Es turned their head at you looking at all the bandages caused from an attack by Kotoko who was innocent and went around attacking the guilty.

"Well I understand why you voted me guilty anyways, and it was Kotoko's fault on attacking everyone who was guilty, it was here decision after all don't be hard on yourself," You pat Es's back and it seemed your words had no affect to them at all, although punishment is what the guilty needs, perhaps this may have gone too far to the point of Es thinking on their decisions.

"Well if you're still feeling guilty about it, you now know that you'll need to think wisely next time don't you." You gave a smile to Es, you were worried that Es isn't enjoying this so you kept thinking on how to make Es feel better from all of this "Maybe take a breather, think about nothing and nothing at all, and just take a deep breathe," You breathed in and breathed out slowly showing the process to Es.

"And how is that gonna help with the issues I'm currently facing?" Es rolls their eyes "Well, if you take a moment of relaxation and putting down these heavy problems on the floor for a moment, you can feel much more better like let me think..." You tried to find an example to what you're saying "Like, let's say you're carrying a heavy bag and the amount of pressure it puts on you is too much so you put it down for a while and relax." Es starts getting your attention as you continue.

"After resting for a while, you continue on your journey with this heavy bag feeling much more better meaning you can handle the pain of it for some time." You turned to Es as you see them look into your eyes making eye contact between you to, this contact stays for a while as Es noticed what's going on "O-Oh is that so?" Es looks away quickly "Mhm," You look in front of you as Es begins to speak "Well, do you think it'll really work?" "Of course," You reassured Es.

"Try to do it yourself, now," You then positioned yourself to sit properly, "Breathe in..." A pause as you inhale the air surrounding you with Es "Breathe out..." Exhaling and letting it all out back to the air as you could see Es being focused at this moment. "Now, close your eyes and just think of a blank space, there's nothing there to be seen, just an empty room." Your imagination does just that seeing nothingness but a plain background.

"Keep that image and don't think about anything else..." Silence takes over as you do as what you've just said. There's nothing to think or worry about now in this space, you only have yourself in this blank room and focusing on it. The seconds felt like hours but you didn't pay attention to them, you still knew the time but didn't care about it, it was only the blank area you've made that matters. "Open your eyes." It was already a minute as you planned how much time it'll take.

"So, how'd you feel?" You look at Es as they simply sighed, "Not sure, there's still much that happened that..." You scoot closer to Es "It's fine, we all have problems then and there and we'll have to face it, yours is much more simple from what I can describe so there's nothing much to really worry about as far as I think." You hold Es's hand making Es startle a bit but brush it off.

"I'm guessing your right, I'll be interrogating her soon anyways, It's my job to do the punishments after all." Es stands up, pulling away from your hand and turn to you, "Thank you, I guess and sorry for what she's done to you." Es opens the door as you ran to catch up to them, "No need for a thanks, but maybe make me innocent? Just kidding! well if you want to." You go out and exit the room as Es just sighs "How are they still kinda annoying."

[mangoposts]

i’m not built for work life i got back from my shift at 4, went to go and look at a house, and then fell asleep at 6.30 i just woke up it’s nearly 11 😭

anyway u were in my dream again 😝

basically we went for a drive, and it was me, you, ur blonde friend, and then this brunette girl, and me and the brunette girl were sat in the back talking about everything, and we were talking about how she went to ucla. and then u were like “ucla isn’t even all that” as a joke, and then the brunette girl starting being like “bitch ur only saying that cos u got rejected and now u spend ur days selling tit pics to old men”

and then i laughed bc i thought she was joking, and ur blonde friend started COMING for my neck again, and this bitch was like “i was fine when u came along with us last time and just sat silently in the back, but laughing at mina’s expense is where i draw the line” and started listing all my pros and cons, but she could only think of the fact im english and that i have tumblr 😭

and then u FINALLY spoke up and u were like “mf its not even that deep like who cares if she’s british, we’re not at war with them anymore” (??) and then she was getting so fucking heated and was saying how she didn’t deserve this treatment bc she was ur only true friend

anyway u then dropped me and the brunette off at her house, and me and her started scrolling through her instagram and i saw a picture of you, and i was like “omg i know her that’s mina!! we play 8 ball together!!” and the girl was like “wtf how do u know her??” as if i wasn’t just with u

and then u showed up without yk who and we all sat on the floor and i was rolling a j on a hello kitty tray and it was strawberry rolling paper and then u facetimed S and she was like “i can fucking smell strawberry, i stg if you’re hanging out with that brit bitch im gonna kill u”

and then i got up and RAN out of the house bc i was petrified she was gonna kill us, but i was dream running so i couldn’t even run properly i was literally going 2mph, so i took off all my clothes and started running in my underwear, and then all of a sudden i was watching an edit of myself running and it had skinny in the background, and all the comments were just saying how sad my lore is because i would go running everyday so i could finally be happy when i was finally skinny

IM CRUINGGGGGGGGGGGLMAOAOAOOAOOOOOO AHATTTTTTTTTTT not S being here like heyyy girl (Ahes actually sweet asf forget dream version)

[aik-membrane]

OOC: Heart-Aik: Aik Membrane's Prequel

Chapter Thirteen /tw: children in distress/pain, blood

Ft mentions of @ambassador-d1b

<July 16th, 2005 continued>

The sound of hot water was running in the background, Aik was watching himself in the mirror. It had taken him a few minutes to figure out how to turn the shower on, it was different from the one he used in the lab.

And while he waited, he ended up staring at himself in the mirror.

All the yellow on his shirt, drowned out in red and black… he liked it. He liked it a lot actually. Those were two good colors getting rid of one bad one.

He slipped off the shirt with some difficulty, being careful of his missing arm, and got a quick shower using the soap and towels already there.

There were some clothes, a little big for him, waiting when he got out. He had to sit a moment before getting dressed due to dizziness.

A knock came from the door, quickly followed by Percy's voice. "You alright in there? Got quiet, you haven't died, right?"

Aik, still recovering from the dizzy spell, nearly jumped to his feet, but slowed himself in the nick of time. "Yeah, uhm. Fine."

"Alright kid, I left some clothes in there for ya."

"I noticed," Aik said, already getting dressed. He again tucked his yellow envelope into the belt of the new clothes. "Uh. Thanks."

"Yep, just come on out and we can do something about your hair," Percy replied.

"My hair?" Aik gave the door a confused look.

"Anyone is gonna recognize you with that hair tuft of yours, plus you lost a bit to fire it seems. So a nice trim would do you some good," Percy explained.

Aik ran his fingers through his wet hair. Percy had a point. "Alright, fine, whatever." He grabbed a towel and ruffled his hair as dry as he could while opening the bathroom door and walking out.

"Nice, I'll grab my hair shears." Percy stepped into another room.

Aik grabbed his shank and held it carefully, hiding it in his shirt. Then he sat on the closest chair, waiting for Percy to come back. He didn't trust the man at all, especially not with shears. But he didn't want to be recognized by more people he couldn't trust.

Soon, Percy came back and after putting a towel around Aik's shoulders and neck, he began to cut Aik's hair until there was about an inch left all around.

Aik stayed still, ready to fight with the shank if he needed to, but not wanting to struggle if he didn't have to.

Percy stayed silent as he worked, aside from occasionally humming a line or two from songs Aik never heard before.

Once he was done, he flipped the towel off Aik with dramatic flair, blowing a bit of hair back into Aik's face by mistake. Aik sneezed on it.

"Whoops, sorry kiddo," Percy chuckled.

Aik just rubbed his eyes and sneezed a second time. "Yeah don't do that again."

All the hair properly removed from his nose, he sniffed and stood to approach the closest mirror. The cut was even, and he certainly didn't look like he had any ties to Membrane anymore. No hair scythe, no yellow shirt, only the black one with jeans that Percy left out for him. He still had that tattoo though… He was pretty sure tattoos could be removed.

He was about to ask Percy about it, but Percy spoke up first.

"Well kid, it's getting close to lunch but we still got some time to establish a few rules," Percy said cheerily.

"Okay." Aik turned to face Percy, standing up straight.

"Rule number one, you work for me now. I'm gonna go easy on you of course, but I'm still the boss," Percy said.

Ail grimaced. He didn't like the sound of that. "Okay, what else?"

"Rule number two, who you are stays a secret. What else can we call you besides Aik?" Percy asked. "Do you have any other names?"

"Nil," Aik muttered.

"Nil? Your middle name? Nah, no good, Membrane knows it," Percy said, clicking his tongue.

"I don't have any other names," Aik said with a small shrug.

"Okay we'll give you a nickname then. What about… Yellow?" Percy suggested.

"Absolutely NOT," Aik replied adamantly.

"Okay, fair…" Percy sighed. "Do you have any suggestions?"

Aik shook his head. "I don't know what wouldn't be suspicious."

"How about Lefty?"

"... Lefty?"

"Because you're missing your left arm," Percy explained.

Aik grimaced again. "That makes no sense…"

Percy sighed. "I'll just call you Shank until we figure something else out."

"Fine," Aik huffed.

"Alright then, Shank. Rule three, quiet time is from 9PM to 9AM, you are to be calm and speak in whispers during then," Percy continued.

"Easy," Aik said.

"Rule four, you earn your keep. If you need something, tell me and I'll tell you how to earn it. I'll make sure you get basic necessities as long as you don't cause too much trouble for me." Percy gave Aik a head pat.

Aik raised an eyebrow. "You know I'm insane, right? I cause a lot of trouble."

"Insane, are you?" Percy leaned down to look Aik in the eye. "Well Shank, let's see how insane you really are. Would you kill someone?"

Membrane came to mind. "Absolutely," Aik replied without hesitation.

"Steal? Lie? Cheat?" Percy continued.

"Yes."

"Ohh, very interesting. Can you fight?" Percy asked.

"Uhm. Kinda?" Aik said.

"I can fix that," Percy said with a mischievous grin.

"What about Dib though? How is this going to help me get my brother back?" Aik asked.

"Do you remember how I said that you can earn things? Work for me, I'll help you get Dib as soon as your shoulder is healed and your training is complete. Got it?" Percy said.

"How long before training is done?" Aik asked.

"Depends on you," Percy answered. "Could be as little as two months, as long as two years."

Aik muttered angrily. "That's too much time."

"Kid, I can't just waltz into Membrane Labs and kidnap your brother for you. This is a two person job and we both need each other at a hundred percent if we're gonna succeed. You want a faster way? Go with someone else," Percy suggested.

Aik sighed. He took a few minutes to think over his options.

He didn't know anyone outside the lab, he didn't even know Percy. But the man already had a chance to turn him in or kill him, so Aik at least had evidence that Percy wouldn't do either of those things. Which was more than he had for anyone else.

He didn't trust that Percy still wouldn't try to sell himself or Dib. But if Percy was going to train him, Aik could at least fight back. And if he sold Dib and himself together, then that would be almost fine. Because then escape would be easier.

And he didn't have anyone else offering him any options of getting Dib back.

"Well?" Percy asked after a few minutes of silence.

"Alright," Aik relented.

"Good kid. I think you and I are gonna get along great, Shank," Percy said with a wide grin.

"Yeaaaah sure," Aik sighed. He already hated the nickname.

[the-whispers-of-death]

there's always a non-zero chance that Līva is in London at the same time as Sylvester is for work.

imagining them running into each-other. maybe it doesnt result in a glaring contest and a screaming match on the main street.

maybe Līva is the one who initiates the conversation. just a simple "can we talk? please?" and i feel like he agrees. theres still cafe's open. maybe they go to one and just get a coffee each

sylvester texts mārīte: "tell your father im gonna be home late. ran into someone i know" <- why must you be so vague

Līva is telling me she's furious at herself for what she did and wants to mend things. shes also very embarrassed and ashamed for showing up on the ranch while intoxicated and how she doesnt even remember what she did or said properly

dont get me wrong, she's never coming near mārīte unsupervised. poor girlie got permanently disfigured because of her and then got abandoned by her

sylvester's telling me he doesnt forgive her, and he won't forget what she did, but he's also not fully against trying to let her back in his life after he finds out she's gone sober

... he doesnt protest when she gives him her new number. but he himself doesnt know why he did that.

he comes home and is quiet. not "tired quiet", but "processing the situation quiet"

when stone asks who he was with, he doesnt lie, and just says it was, in fact, his ex and how she seemed desperate to work things out a decade too late

~ rusty

Stone is obviously wary, but this is ultimately Sylvester and Mārīte's choice so he'll support them. He's suspicious about her suddenly coming to her senses though.

Definitely gets Kali or Ladder to do a deep background check on her. Just in case of any surprises.

[feuqueerfire]

Triage Live Blogging

Been meaning to watch this since it was released around this time in 2022 but there was such a debacle with the airing, like airing for a 2 hour window on Youtube before it's taken down lol I hope I like it, I enjoy time fuckery and seeing the one you love die over and over again in front of you.

From what I've seen, everybody seems to have really, really liked this except maybe some messiness (?) at the end.

Ep 1 (May 1)

wait... the doctor addressing the other guys as Nong... didn't see his outfit properly but is he a college student? I hope he is, I want age gap yay

18th July, 9PM

ah, so the nong was speeding and ran into a motorcycle

I've been made aware of the clock saying accurate time...

oh he's still a student in his final year of residency, so not as big of an age gap as if he was already a doctor

so the Intern is below P'Tin and she had to have completed at least 6 years of M.D + gotten license and is currently doing her internship, so Tin must've done all this already? I don't fully know what the steps are to become a doctor, esp in Thailand

Nong is 22 years old

I wish the subs were easier to read, especially since it gives like medical info and background

ah, both of them passed away... (at 10:55pm)

Ah, seems like Tin's sister had previously been in an accident because of a drunk person (and she died I'm guessing?)

who is that security guard, hm

oh, he went back to 9:50PM, does he only get back to this time or gradually earlier and earlier? or maybe he gets to go through more of the time and into the next day(s) before he's back into the cycle?

how do you even do your work as a doctor when you're in this situation lol

"If you want to escape this whirlpool, you have save that kid." - the security guard mans

Jinta - chief of court of justice of heaven or smth

omg uncountable number of loops, I would've said fuck it and tried to off myself fr

cat named Zebra

2 Years Ago: the accident where his sister presumably died

yeah, i expect resentment that he's in this loop to save this random kid but wasn't given the chance for his sister

ah, he thinks the kid deserves to die, not surprising

He now woke up at 7AM of that day

pls mans faked fainting instead of doing the test, i was wondering what's up with the sudden funny music

oh, he wakes up where he fell asleep at the time he previously fell asleep there

dang, if the kid dies 2 months from now, will Tin go back into the loop? but probably won't come back 2 months earlier right, just to the last time he slept at some place

so funny, he went to a college to some random kid and told him you will die tonight and the only way to survive is to never die

Pretty interesting so far, I'm excited. I actually don't know how romance-heavy this is but I know we get at least some romantic moments

oh spoiler, I think I read something about in the end, the other guy gets into the loop? Also... is there something about organ trafficking?

Also, the comments here mentioned the drama with OffGun fans, I remember I was into OffGun at the time after Not Me and followed some fans and bruh, they were so cagey and acting as if this show was the devil. lol whatever

Ep 2 (May 1)

ah, Tin wants to return to his hometown to work

Nong guy rich and beautiful and good student and a model and good at sports? I was gonna say let's kill him but instead we're trying to save him...

oh, Tonnam is here, named Sing. when will his Sci-Fi Wish You Luck series come out?

loll Tin's killing technique of just pretending to be dizzy/faint/whatever

Warit?

pls he really went to tell him about dying tonight and in front of friends too

I can't tell if they're hinting as a P'Sing/Gap side couple

Wonder what's up with Tol's girlfriend? something about some guys joking? and what's up with the bag?

getting into the car with him loll

fun exchange but i get Tin's frustration like wtf is he even supposed to do? i guess he should find some sort of proof that he's indeed in a loop, like figuring out what's gonna happen and telling it to Tol

Ah, some bastard did something to his gf Mai?

c'mon, translate what he's writing, idk Thai

Jinta's here to remind Tin about consequences and butterfly effect, so maybe this time Tin'll actually succeed in saving Tol for tonight? but maybe have fucked up something in his own life

Who is this Warit? esp in relation to Sing? I wonder if Sing's also in a time loop with target Warit or no?

okay he didn't react with recognition when Tin asked Sing how he'd react if a stranger came to tell him he'd die tonight, so I guess he's not in a loop

oh, is Warit somebody Sing thinks of as his little brother?

Warit died because of Tin's actions?

Ah, Tin was able to treat Warit but Sing wasn't? Which is why when Sing took over for Tin, Warit died?

ah... missing kidney? Organ trafficking...

So he can return to a previous day as he wants? idgi like how's he gonna go to the 17th?

Ep 3 (May 1)

girl, I'm already on ep 3 and I started this in the afternoon...

pls Tol is waiting for just oneeee hint that Tin's with whatever dudes and he'll beat the shit out of him again

plsssss Tin's so silly, mans has Tol's account in his Facebook history and knows that Tol's suspicious of him but still handed it over to become friends. fr stressing me out

aw, poor cat

Tin giving Tol his white shirt and doing his best to not look as Tol changes lol

ah, Warit is Fluke (ex-GMMTV, My Gear Your Gown)

Professor Sak, Director-to-be, probably smuggling organs

oh, we're straight up asking if Gap's secretly in love with Sing lol

pls, the way Art's acting as if insinuating that Tin and Tol fucked, which is why Tol's wearing Tin's shirt now like girl... Tol has a gf?

The teacher told the students about somebody attempting suicide?

idek their age gap but I'm into it, idkidk

aw, Tin's gonna take care of Tol's cat

as soon as he said sorry to hear that, Tin should've jumped in like "AND THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER DRIVE WHILE DRUNK OR PICK UP CALLS OR BECOME DISTRACTED !!!!"

Tin lowkey already falling for Tol like okay

lol Tol accidentally telling Tin to marry him by telling him to find a wife that's close to him

hm... Doi is working with Sak and Mai's asking Doi about her mom... are they harvesting Mai's mother's organs or something?

Who is Tol's father? Doi refers to him as Khun Tol. oh wait Sak's friend's son right

Tol uses 'ter' with Mai

bruh, Tol's pride making it so that he throws Mai a party and pressures her to attend it despite her wanting to spend time with her sick mother... Are they gonna make Mai be a bad person or something?

Ah, he has his friend Fang who knows Tin likes men? I didn't even know fully if Tin knew he liked men lol but I guess it makes sense based on how he acted around Tol but didn't get freaked out about his feelings/attraction

pls it makes me so nervous whenever Tin tells or almost tells Tol about not going/dying/not driving, whatever. at least it's a consolation that Tol's gonna die and not remember the weird shit Tin pulls? it's lol in the worst way

Mai's contact named Heart... assuming that's not Tol?

Throughout the whole ep, as Tin and Tol became closer, I was losing my mind at how you become closer to somebody knowing that they're a high chance they'll die tomorrow. Not only is Tin becoming friends and closer to Tol but he's gonna fall in love too.

Ep 4 (May 2)

ah, Mai's Heart contact and her are taking a break, so not necessarily cheating? Actually a break isn't the same thing as a break-up umm

omg wait... she's using Tol's status and money to take care of her mother... i get her lol

there's so much happening in this loop, will we have everything be undone? Like progress with Tol but also the stuff with Sak (and him saying 'deal with Warit' to Doi) and also Tin with his friend. but maybe this loop will have Warit die because of Doi's meddling, so next loop Tin'll stop Sing from barging into Sak's office

oh tin, at least pretend to check what's wrong with the patient(s), now Doi is like hmm did Tin already know about our plan to mess with Rit?

nervous meeting for both Sak and Tin

omg... okay Tol wasn't drunk but this time him, Art, and the motorcycle grandpa all got into the accident

Tol dead again and Art in a coma

oh? Something revealing in Tol's autopsy results? In the r/boyslove on-air thread for eps 1 - 3, somebody mentioned that maybe Tol and Tin's sister have a connection, like maybe Tol has his sister's organ or something in him, maybe that's what it'll reveal?

Sak behaved weirdly with a case of an uncle 2 months ago...

Sing becoming jealous/possessive when Tin's affectionate with Gap lol

in the hallucination, Tol says "please take care of my heart for me" okay... heart hm

ah, Tol had a heart failure, okay everything's pointing to issues with the heart

I wonder what Sak had told the autopsy guy in that call right after Tin had asked for the autopsy results

I don't care about Manner of Death or MaxTul, so this was just awkward for me lol

girl why are you driving right now, be fr

bruh yeah scary why drive

Ep 5 (May 2)

A new loop begins: June 17

lol incredibly specific questioning and diagnosis in a coffee shop just after hearing that Tol gets somewhat tired about playing soccer but i mean if it works, it works

"It's not gonna hurt, is it?" oh girl you've died so many times now

bruh these fuckers blamed another student for cheating? and the prof irritating af for just being like yeah Warit i believe you're the cheater cuz I found it near your desk

bruh, the cheaters said that they saw Warit cheat?

but what's up with the previous loop where the girl and the guy were talking as if Warit made them pass (through cheating) but Tol didn't know what that was fully about? like the girl stopped the guy from speaking about it to Tol?

agh, are they gonna make it be like Tol somehow had no idea about the cheating or about copying Warit's project idea and somebody else in the group did it?

Tin still believes in Tol and that he'd feel guilty for doing the cheating stuff to Warit

Interesting that Sing and Fang are independently suspicious of and are kinda investigating Sak and Doi. good that not everything depends on Tin (well Tin was even defending Sak at the beginning 2 months ago with the Uncle's case)

her other boyfriend coming to save her from the debt collectors, yikes

what was the name of the patient Dr. Fang checked? Was it Mai's mom and the medicine Doi & Sak are assigning her?

hehe in this iteration, Tin helps out Tol and gets a nice Tol who trusts him. they're cute. i'm sad that this is gonna be over and Tol's gonna die and he's gonna go back to step 0 while Tin will be stuck in a loop still

I think there's a tiktok that I've liked for Triage and it begins in this clock tower but idk if they're up here in another iteration too

no way Tol leaning in that far lmfaooo he was crowding in fr. they're doing too many face shots and I didn't realize just how much Tol had leaned in

Tin is familiar to Tol? Y'know Gap also said something about the situation earlier was familiar... would people kinda realize that they've lived this before/they're in a loop?

omg, Tin's trying once again to tell Tol about the time loop

omg klasdjflaksdfj kl;asdfj ahhh kissing Tol to stop him from leaving ahhhhh

So did Tol's cat not get injured in this version?

I'm impressed that so far, the story hasn't gotten boring and despite us going through similar scenarios or reveals, the show doesn't quite feel repetitive. They're changing up the scenes enough and finding newer questions or answers so that each loop gives something new.

Ep 6 (May 2)

I wish I had the patience to savour this show and watch like 1 ep, maybe max 2 eps a day.

pushing him off and leaving, as expected

omg, the reason Mai was dragged out by the guy (her real bf lol) from the party was because he was at the hospital and realized Doi and Sak had drugged Mai's mother (to kill her and likely harvest her organs) and so wanted to take her there...

these fucking doctors not calling Mai directly...

omg Tol seeing boys kiss and remembering Tin kissing him...

wait, Tol just had a memory of that car crash? even though he hasn't experienced it yet?

Ah, Tol finally believing it's not the first time that they're meeting/he's dying in front of Tin. I saw a gif when looking for ep 5 gifs of this moment

From Tol getting flashbacks to his previous death and now finally believing this loop thing, I wonder if he'll kinda remember stuff in his next loop?

lol Sing and Gap push and pull

Ahh, Tin crying that he doesn't want Tol to forget about him anymore

June 19th

I wish there was a way for them to realize the overlap that the woman who was taken for the surgery is Mai's mother, then talk to Mai and the guy about her condition last night

lmfao Ton and Tin childhood connection

ah, Tin now finds about the Mai and her mother in the hospital connection

ah, the guy's name is Heart lmfao I thought it was an endearment

sorry they can't make me hate Heart. i get Tin being disappointed but not angry at her because idk her actions are understandable even if immoral

bruh organ trafficking right under everybody's noses + caught on CCTV

They fucking killed Fang or what omgggg... crazy. okay at least Tol is dying soon so that we can restart the loop cuz omg

oh? Tin doesn't remember things right away? "The longer I turn back time, the longer it takes me to remember everything"

oh he wants to back a week to June 11

Also, I realized Jinta reminds me of the story in Dead Friend Forever, hmm is this a common name for Thai supersition and stuff?

Ep 7 (May 3)

23.5 Episode 9 is out since it's Monday but I kinda don't wanna watch it right now? I might just finish out Triage in the next 2-3 days and then watch the next 23.5 episode. Since it's like a regular high school drama, feels like I don't feel the urgency to really know what's gonna happen next.

oops I've been saying June but it's July 11

Tin trying to remember everything and make a to-do list and here's one that needs Tol to fall in love with him lol

Aw Tin, Tol would def fall for you lol

hilarious to have Todo #3: Tol must be Tin's boyfriend

they're so awkward (as they always are at first), i'm crying

Tol's mom (Pang) is so pretty

wonder if Tol's dad would be involved in this at all? I assume they just know each other and isn't into the organ trafficking

why is Tol's dad negging him in front of Tin lol so mean

ah, they're in Chiang Mai

must be wild to be falling in love with Tol but 1) he doesn't remember you 2) he doesn't like you 3) he's gonna die if you don't save him

Gap keeps remembering that Tin asks Sing to switch shifts with him everytime lol

he ain't gonna let the tutoring go

klasdfj pls "I just miss you, that's all" i love him just inserting himself as a love line

Tol is a real jackass fr

hmm Dear... is Tol jealous of her with Tin?

Ep 8 (May 3)

heh jealous Tol

ah, she's Tin's ex

"But I don't have anybody in my mind yet na" *sparkly music*

damn we see the full scene of when Tol drowned

ahhh Tol being the one who asks to spend time with Tin for a change by asking to see Seudam

spoiled enough that as a college student doesn't know how to even crack an egg, oh Tol

okay they're gonna retcon some of Tol's assholery right? Cuz he's quite a dick from what we assume but they might not want the literally romantic interest male lead to be that way

Ah, Tin encouraging Tol to do the right thing (assuming about the cheating thing tomorrow when they blame Rit?)

I've seen the first shot at 16:00 when they're tutoring in the beginning of an edit too

damn, not even any situation of them deciding to have Tin stay over and sleep in the same bed?

ah, Tol dreaming of drowning that one time but also dying in past loops

Tin telling Tol that it's just a dream. I wonder when (or if...) Tol will find out and believe the loop thing, will it be in this loop or a future one, if at all until he ends up in a loop himself

hm... Rit and Tol and Art making up

okay Tol changed this loop to defend Rit and say whose it is (and he didn't cheat this time, so didn't have to face any consequences himself). wonder how it'll play out since there have been some pretty big changes for Warit since the original loop and they now kowkey have enemies in Pair and Win (?)

girl, don't tell Tol on the phone?! meet up face-to-face

hope the extent of the cheaters' revenge is just exposing Mai having a bf

aw man, are we gonna have Tin having Tol wait for a long time or what?

omggg agh I wanted to have Tin tell Tol about it but now Pear's sent Tol the photo of Mai and the guy agh

and thennnn he sees Tin with his ex my goddd give Tol a break, he decided to not be an asshole to Warit + is having nightmares about his past deaths and the feeling that he's gone through everything already. pls

I know that before in the original loop(s), Tol knew about Mai and some guy but thought it wasn't her cheating but that he came to bother her or something? And this is different than that case right? Cuz in previous scenario he found out some other way, not through Pear's photo as revenge?

Tol waits mournfully in that clock tower while Tin's battling possibly Rit's uncle (Sak stole his nephew's kidney) who is wielding a knife at the hospital and then gets stabbed omg

I saw in a gif when looking for ep 8 gifs... are they kissing next ep? Also saw a post that started with "This better be the last loop" so I'm guessing Tol dying again rip

Ep 9 (May 3)

I... have so many things to do that I should be doing instead of watching the next episode. man...

"I wonder if Tol can hear me in every loop" that's wild

Is Tol upset that he didn't get any calls from Tin?

Dr. Fang, you're everything

damn, the knife uncle killed himself (or was killed more likely) in prison

Don't you worry that Sak's gonna off Warit too?

I get Sing wants to get to the bottom of this but girl, how would you ensure Warit's unharmed? Fang died in a previous loop, man

I like Sing/Gap but not during serious moments

dang just straight up going for Sak's computer

A full day has already passed? 17th already

They don't translate what Win wrote on his post

Jinta such a shipper like "oh you're here? Tin can't use his hands but has to eat" *wink* and Tol does indeed feed Tin

oh, we're going straight into "yeah you die in every loop and i tried to find the cause"

Less dramatic leadup and explanation and disbelief than I expected

damn, pinky promise, well Tol better not die tomorrow/18th

nawt fuckass Pear and Win aughhhh let's kill them

ahh Rit pls don't go against Tol right now cuz that's just another hurdle in the loop T.T esp don't team up with the hellish pair to do it

omg why Heart become scary and throwing things D:

Tol eager to have Tin in his house again lol Toi enjoying overhearing

Ow man Tol... being nice to Mai is fine but don't start it up with her again please

okayy Tol not getting back together with her

aw breakups suck even though neither of them even romantically like the other

damn, they're sleeping in different bed/couch now and then having a discussion before sharing the bed, where was this last ep lol

damn, talking about past loops and deaths in bed

"We both will have a bright future together"

heart beating so fast Tol wonders if he'll have a heart attack but he might just be playing it up as a little hint/tease lol

kiss yay !

Tol's probably gonna die next ep and it'll devastate me fr because they're like... in love now.

Wait... I'm going through this ep's gifs and maybe?? next ep is the one where Tol wakes up in a loop? omg... I thought it'd be like the last ep or 2

Ep 10 (May 3)

The fourth episode of the day oof

hmmm Tol reading Tin's diary... he wouldn't be mad about seeing becoming Tol's boyfriend on the to-do list right? I feel like he should see and be preoccupied with the organ trafficking

omg?? okay, in the ep 9 (I think) reddit on-air, somebody was like this scratches the itch if you wanted more Fourth/Beam in 2moons and I didn't understand what they meant because I didn't think Fiat, Tonnam, gap's actor were in 2moons. but turns out it referred to TaeTee omg? I didn't know they were in 2moons as a tertiary couple lol idk why it just blew my mind, so they're literally a side couple getting a main show, that's crazy idk. I think I especially didn't realize because Tae had Paint With Love with Singto, so I thought Tae/Tee was a new ship after that.

aw going back to sleep beside Tin and cuddling kind of and watching him sleep, so sweet

it's the 18th

Doi got to the flash drive first...

everything is so nerve-wracking like on the one hand Tol's got this party for this project that Rit's gonna be sabotaging with Win and Pear's help and on the other hand, Sing and Doi are onto Sing and Gap, and also now 1) this sus dude entering Tol's party... is he gonna end up doing something to Tin/is gonna try to do something to Tol and Tin will step in like with that uncle when he got stabbed? and 2) this nurse with a syringe? is it for Mai's mother?

okay, I think Art is thankfully gonna be useful and get through to Rit about how two-faced Lukpear and Win are.

back hug

me and Tol both dreading this night

omg Tin pinky promised Tol that nothing bad will happen to him... the chance of Tin dying by stepping in front of Tol gets likelier and likelier

not Mai texting Heart again smh c'mon girl. I believe you'll be fine without a boyfriend

girl, so much shit going down. injection in the mother, Sing and Gap captured, random dude on Tol's tail + Lukepear taking things into her own hand once Rit tries to leave

hope Sing and Gap took the guns at least

wtf is this gun wielding fucker even doing bruh

omg mans shot Tin

that blood splatter across Sing's mask is crazy

losing my fucking mind at Sing still continuing to pump Tin's lung (?) after everybody else has stopped because he refuses to believe it

Sing deranged being like "Tin, you're okay, right? Tell P'Toi you're fine"

bruh i was wondering if time of death would end up being 10:55PM and indeed...

aughhhh everybody mourning

I wonder how Tol's time loop is gonna start because I'm assuming he's been sleeping? ig they haven't started yet to really let the death sink in

Tol randomly calling out for P'Tin omggg

Also, what happened to Mai's mom?

omg it's been weeks after Tin passed

Tol actually does sound like he's lost it, asking around about Jinta who nobody knows and now saying that he knows a way to bring back Tin by getting Jinta to turn back time omg poor baby :'(

omg not security T.T

well at least he's found Jinta

the last third of this ep is devastating fr, makes me wish I hadn't known about Tol getting into the time loop and such so that everything would be more heightened

reading the on-air threads is making me realize... I wonder what time Tol's gonna go back to, would he go way way back before Tin learned about anything? Someone also said ep 4 "ghost" Tol who asked Tin to take care of his heart was actually time loop Tol, which would be a cool hint

Anyway, the show is so good so far, I'm nervous about the fact that I've heard the last few eps get kinda wonky or too messy/fast. I really hope they don't fuck up the ending omg

Ep 11 (May 4)

Final 3 episodes, thinking I'm gonna finish it today, so excited, I'm hoping I love the last bit too

omg? Tin actively learned that class to tutor Tol to get him to not cheat

omg not Tol being the one who initially hurt Mai accidentally with the vase

Jinta is really an angel in this universe ig

ahh the ep 4 dream Tol

July 14

Tol's gotta fix the stuff himself now, starting with not taking credit for Rit's presentation

damn, Tol's giving up his position in the group to Warit, though I just hate Lukepair and Win and don't trust them

Okayyy Tin's coming back but without memories, let's go

Tol wanting to take the deal only if he's the one who ends up dying this final time instead of Tin (though idk if Jinta'll grant him that lol)

now it's Tol's turn to be a random stalker-like dude who knows all about Tin and is very presumptuous and pushy heh

aw, dream Tin giving Tol a notebook of everything that happened in the loops

"We will never be together, right?" TOL DONT SAYYY THAT

lmfaoooo a kiss can remind the other person a bit about past loops, that's hilarious

okay, now Tol's also gotta be involved in the organ trafficking investigation stuff right because that's a very important aspect of these loops

Sing's boyfriend lol that's what that one textpost I kinda saw that mentioned 'they started dating off-screen' was talking about

...Tin's not working for Sak in this loop, is he? IS HE?! D:

or Tin just doesn't care about his job and patients in this loop after his sister's death

okay and Tol got Mai to move her mother too

lol Sing and Gap

pls Tol is actually just a stalker now

I was nervous that Tol was gonna just go and kiss Tin and get punched but then he couldn't even do that because Dear showed up

2 more episodes...

I like this comment talking about how Tin was also callous and careless in the first episode after Tol came in. It's not that Tin being changed and cold now in this timeline is that different than what he was like in the original timeline first few loops. Similarly, this comment about "How do you know if Tin would be the same Tin if he didn't meet you." 

Ep 12 (May 4)

damn, Dear and Tin randomly both there at the clock tower, thinking the other called them there? and also they apparently hadn't met in a long time... so not dating, still exes?

ah, Tin's confused about some sort of romantic connection and thought it was Dear that he's missing?

plssss Tin previously asking Fang to help hit on Tol and now Tol doing the same

omg we've moved on from dates to countdowns. 60 hours left, 2.5 days

bro use the fact that you've got some heart condition to at least become Tin's patient, c'mon

pls not Nong Dear being there too and Fang somehow siding with Tol over her

throwback to that dinner with family when Tol was on his own phone the whole time

poor Tol doing the same hopeless shit Tin did in his earlier loops but my guy gets just one chance ahhhh

omg, magic notebook where the writing can be seen by Tol but nobody else

idk if the lesson should be to keep pursuing him lol like obviously Tol will because of reasons but Fang doesn't know that

oh, Mai and Heart are pursuing legal action against Sak?

damn, Sak's gonna try to get somebody else's organs now so that some other fuckers help him get off the hook on his trial

lmfao yep, everybody who's doing a case against you turning up dead wouldn't be suspicious at all

Tol's mother is sooooo pretty

ah, the tutoring session once again, starting with the same shot. though now Tol's scheming to kiss Tin

Tol's attempts are so awkward I'm dying, esp because Tin's awkward attempts or ones that went wrong results in Tol's death soon enough and it's like whelp, doesn't matter cuz Tol doesn't remember but this... it's different. it's going on for days on end and is the finally loop, so Tin will remember

pls not fake drowning, i'm dead wtf Tol, guess he's hoping for a CPR kiss?

"Get up when you want to, then" I'm alskdfj;alskdfj;lkasdf this is so awkward i'm dying

A tiny heart-to-heart sort of

Tol is actually the funniest person, what is this strategic kissing while asleep + pretending to have a nightmare

ah, he managed a kiss + Tin is now slowly remembering things

damn, Tin REALLY doesn't wanna go against Sak

Sing and Gap are cute enough but don't know I want too much of them in the midst of this high-tension stuff

Tin, be fucking serious and do not fall for Sak's tricks

Jinta does hint that maybe the reason Tin's so callous about life in this universe is because Tol doesn't come into his life and the loops don't change him/show him to value life

hmm the notebook is "super cheating if you know how to use it"

naurr fuckass Doi getting to Rit

lol Sing and Gap's storyline where Sing mentions gel/lube. Today Wandee Goodday was released and apparently that also mentioned lube, interesting to have it happen twice in one day for me when that's like rarely ever mentioned in BLs

oh wtf Doi has Rit hostage in Sing's apartment?!

The first half was kinda more comedic and relationship-oriented but I enjoyed the latter half more when things started getting a bit more serious.

I probably get what people mean about the last ep being fast and chaotic, seems like there's so much left for a 48 min ep

Ep 13 (May 4)

Finale, I hope it's intense and coherent and romantic and good

Gap, DO SOMETHING don't just stand there and listen to Sing and Doi showdown through the phone

pls not Tol getting excited af at getting the pulse, he's so... baby

omg i thought he was just gonna hug Tin but he kissed him??? pls

visions when they kissed

Tol's so excited asking Tin to kiss again

Tin remembering more about the loops

I hope Gap's lying about not having told anybody cuz then what was even the point of the phone call

idk what Warit texted Fang but maybe it's about Doi, who knows

who is Chalongchai? Is it the guy who shot Tin in the last loop?

not Tin and Tol getting fucking injected

girl, 5 minutes left ?!?!?!?!?!

Ah, Tin remembers but doesn't realize that there will be no loop

this fucking unhinged Doi is way too much girl gtfo why'd you inject Tin >:(

The piano at like 31:55 reminded me of We Best Love I think? Crazy that I can remember it. though it actually might be from the OST from it that I added to my playlist

damn, Tin in a coma. at least he ain't dead

wait, Tin appears at the clock tower just like that ??

plsss I was like Tin has Got to be kidding, he must remember right? it's too late in the episode, he's just faking Tol out but it went on for so long that I was like ? damn, maybe miss girl really doesn't remember

but indeed he does

aw, it ends just like that :( i wish there was just a bit more. i guess ep 9 was the one that had the most lovey-dovey moments between the two of them

was that after-credit scene a teaser for Euthanasia or whatever? The Maxtul Manner of Death spin-off that is unlikely to come to fruition?

I never commented on it but I guess Tin's wish to save Tol when they were kids really had a part in this loop?

This last ep hmmm it was good but somehow felt messier than the earlier loops, which felt move tightly woven together and better written? Like this is the type of writing that put me off of Manner of Death where things didn't feel quite rational, like the Sing and Gap and Doi stuff, or Doi in general going off the rails, or the random kidnapping in the hospital, and then Tin being in a coma for months and months until meeting in the clock tower on a random day. They wanted the last ep to be fast-paced and intense and that's fine but it wasn't as coherent as some of the earlier episodes.

Overall:

Great concept, mostly great execution (especially the first 3/4 like until ep 9 or 10), strong character building. Enjoyed unveiling more and more through each loop and seeing how situations and people changed through them.

Very commendable that despite it literally being time loops, the show didn't feel repetitive, they timed things well. I could've done with a little more romance but what little there was of them actually being together in like eps 9 - 10 were very cute.

I'd thought that they were the same age or similar ages for some reason but Tol is at least a few years younger than Tin and I liked that. Also omg in the last loop last few eps, I was thinking that wide-eyed, bumbling, eager, kind of naive Tol reminded me of Yeowoon from Love for Love's Sake after he softens up and turns out there's even an edit for it on tiktok lol so I'm correct.

This also makes me more excited for 4 Minutes and Spare Me Your Mercy, also Sammon novels because I found Manner of Death to be underwhelming and frustrating with how... stupid everybody was. This had more intelligent characters and I liked the plot better since it didn't fall into the "somehow a show about abuse women face but we only focus on male characters"

Rating: 7/10 [May 12, 2024 Update: Decreased by 0.5 stars when rerating shows I've watched in 2024: 7 -> 6.5]

[the-winds-of-destiny-xxx]

uni

still nothing from my personal tutor (useless smh). essay due next week. stressed about it. not sure if it's gonna turn out great but all i can do is try my best. i have been working on it these past few days over video call with friends from my course. sometimes we do a teleparty for background noise too 😭. they're gonna stay up late tonight to finish theirs but i'm so tired so i'm gonna go to bed and wake up early tmr and try to just spend all day getting it done.

gym

went gym this morning so that's my second time for the week. I wanted to get back into the groove of going 3x a week but I just don't have the time for it this week so I'll try again after the essay's been submitted. Today's workout was back, arms and legs focused. I enjoyed it tbh but didn't stretch properly before so now my right arm is aching :(

mood

ran out of meds so feeling dizzy. starting to get to the stage where my emotions are gonna be all over the place. been thinking about W again. The thoughts will go away eventually, I’m just a yearner.

[weepingvoidpenguin]

Unfortunately Yours

Summary: When you and Bucky successfully infiltrate a HYDRA auction, you’re told to stay another day due to max capacity on the jet. But how are you going to survive a night alone with this insufferable Super Soldier? Especially considering the miniscule size of the room and the obvious dilemma presented; who gets the bed?

Warning: S M U T , the smuttiest thing I’ve ever written, language, spit kink, daddy kink, ptsd symptoms, slight voyeurism, slight exhibitionism, hate-s e x, rough, more like enemies-to-lovers kind of thing, gagging, m!receiving, f!receiving, lots of receiving lol, 18+, M

Word Count: 10.6K (Whhhyyyyy)

   Your body burned with exhaustion and the sheer weight of your extremities felt enough to drag you to the floor and mirror a coma with the length of your hibernation. You no longer had the minimal strength required to pick up your feet properly which resulted in the sound of shuffling to fill the small, and by small you meant miniscule, room you’d been assigned to. 

   Well, you and Bucky had been assigned to.

   You’d both played your parts well enough over the course of the last few hours. You’d sauntered into the ran-shacked looking bar with Bucky’s arm tossed lazily over your shoulder, his distaste for the assignment evident on his face, but he’d cleared it away the second his foot crossed the threshold. He pulled you in tighter to his body and raised his chin into the air, emitting the energy of a man not to be trifled with. You’d portrayed your role as a damsel just as, if not more, convincing as Barnes’ opposite. Your shoulders hunched over and your steps were small and quivering, the wig on your head a tool used to curtain the hair in your face. 

   You were the lamb to this White Wolf.

   Word had traveled through the dark and twisted grapevine that a certain showing of sorts took place tonight and a high-ranking target was rumored to be amongst its audience. You and Barnes were on the first flight to Germany within minutes.

   Bucky had pulled you through the crowd moving along to the thundering music in the background and halted at the edge of the bar. His grip on your shoulder tightened once he’d caught the man’s attention and you winced, his fingers digging a little too deep for your liking.

   The bartender scanned you over and took in your frame, making you feel smaller than you had already displayed yourself to be. It took him a while to conclude but when he took in Bucky’s domineering gaze, a look as if to say Deny me, I dare you, he nodded once and wrote something down on a napkin, sliding it over to Bucky.

   Scum. All of them. 

   You nearly blew your cover trying to throw Bucky a look but you refrained from the hellfire clawing its way out of you. You had to be perfectly in control, emotions and beliefs aside. You were a damsel and you had to make certain they believed that. You knew they were watching; they always were.

   “Relax,” Bucky hissed, pulling you under his arm and bringing his lips to your ear.

   “When you pretend you’re the one being put up for auction, then you can tell me to relax,” you muttered, never looking up from the ground.

   “I have been.” When you paused your movement, he pulled away to scan the room, “Nothing’s gonna happen to you. I promise.” He led you backstage and turned the corner to a dimly lit hallway, barren of any decoration in sharp contrast to every other section of the building, “Besides, once they realize how insufferable you are, they’ll be begging me to take you back,”

   He opened an iron door and pushed you into the room, sending you tumbling down onto the carpet. He tsked, stepping over you and not looking back after shutting the door behind himself. You counted thirteen pairs of feet and judging by the way some of them were turned towards you, they had to be watching. You observed your hands for a second, counting slowly until you figured you’d stalled long enough and sent your trembling gaze to the exit. Bucky let out a low chuckle and clasped his hand around your upper arm, launching you back onto your feet and twisting your body to face him.

   Oh, darling, German fluently escaped his tongue and you nearly rolled your eyes at the condescending tone settled in his words, You know better than that, don’t you?

   His hold tightened and you winced, holding back the whimper in your throat. If you saw any hint of a bruise forming on your arm, you would give him hell later . . . and possibly even if you didn’t.

   You bit your tongue and let him lead you towards a leather chair before he pulled you swiftly down onto his lap where his hand remained on your thigh, brushing the inside softly. Had you not been so annoyed, you’d have been humiliated at all the stares devouring the scene unfolding before them. 

   Good girl, he drawled and pressed your back flat up against his chest where he could put you on display.

   You knew you should’ve been annoyed, or at least settled so into your role as his temporary whore-for-sale that the sensation coming alive between your thighs shouldn’t have made an appearance. But sometimes, the way Bucky brought his voice down real low and cooed an insult or jest your way just had an affect that your body would not deny. It kept you awake a lot.

   Instead, you swallowed hard and let yourself be splayed against him. You ignored the scent of sandalwood in his cologne.

   Your body trembled from the cold breeze floating around in the room and you shifted in Bucky’s lap to block everyone’s sight from the way your chest reacted to the change in temperature.

   Don’t be shy, he murmured and removed your arms from your breasts, letting the thin, practically see-through fabric show you to the world.

   “Buc-” You started, your panic creeping through the cracks at the cheshire sneers sent your way, but at the first sign of your discomfort, he retracted his hands and twisted you around gently, throwing your legs over the side of the chair and spreading them but forcing your upper half to face him. Effectively, cutting your chest off from their line of sight.

   You trembled out a sigh and he grabbed your face tightly, drawing your eyes to his. He examined you, his hardened gaze shouting words he couldn’t currently say. But you understood. He could be a jerk, but he wasn’t a bad man.

   Your body instinctively leaned into him for warmth as another breeze engulfed you, resulting in a shiver that made its way up your spine. “Are they still looking?” you inquired and he gripped your neck with a ferocity that made you squirm in his lap. Fuck.

   He pulled your ear to his lips and licked the helix. You whimpered. “No,” he whispered, running his thumb along your jawline, “But if you don’t quit fucking squirming you’re gonna have a problem, Doll,”

   You opened your mouth in question when you felt a sudden twitch on your backside and you swallowed. Hard. He never broke eye contact with you, instead choosing to raise a brow in mocking. Your chest heaved up and down and how you could feel his breath grazing on your cheek almost had you rubbing your legs together for some form of desperate friction. No, you had to keep yourself composed, keep the act going. But he’d seen it. All of it.

   You nod your head and slowed your breathing down until he released his grip around your throat and turned his attention towards the dim stage. You leaned back into him and followed suit, making sure to keep your attention downcast and appear disheveled. 

   “There,” Bucky whispered after a few minutes and you lifted your head only to find the man you had come all this way for walking straight towards you.

   Like a moth to a flame.

   “How much?” The older man inquired, his grotesque gaze settled on your spread legs.

   Bucky looked up at the balding man as if this was the first time he’d noticed his presence, “I guess you’ll just have to wait and see, won’t you?” 

   The man lifted his brow, or what would’ve been, and smiled wickedly, “I’ll give you double your price if you give her to me now,” he offered, his eyes slithering up to the apex of your thighs and this time you didn’t have to fake the shiver running up your spine. 

   A small smirk formed on Bucky’s face and he waved his hand dismissively at him, “Get in line,”

   The old man sneered but Bucky was right, most everyone had their attention fixated on what was happening currently and it was apparent there was, indeed, a line. 

   Bucky rested his gloved hand on your upper thigh and gripped tight, whether to refrain from hitting the guy or just to touch you, he wasn’t sure but he couldn’t keep you away when the man said, “I’ll give you four times the asking price but I want her now,” 

   Bucky’s grip on your thigh tightened and you squeaked at the pain, jumping slightly in his lap. “How about I give her to you for free for ten minutes and you tell me if you can handle her,”

   You jerked your head towards Bucky and furrowed your brows. Free? Dick. You nearly scoffed.

   The man gripped onto your calf and you shifted to kick his hand away when Bucky’s own shot out and and ripped his off of you, “Don’t touch my stuff,” he spit and the man let out a yell but that only spurred Bucky on and he tightened his fist, “Until terms are agreed upon, she remains mine to do with as I please. Understood?”

   The man nodded hastily and Bucky threw you off his lap when he stood up. “Anyone else?” Bucky shouted to the room, daring others to test his limits when it came to you. After a few moments of silence Bucky scoffed, “I didn’t fucking think so,”

   Bucky’s grip on the man remained and he stared down at the hunched figure, “Now, you,” he addressed and the room remained silent. This was allowed here. 

   Normally, merchandise couldn’t be touched until it was purchased. No buying before the auction, no discussing what you’re offering, no negotiating but most importantly don’t try to steal from anyone. These are criminals and that being said, they handle things amongst themselves. They know the rules and the risks they take breaking them.

   So, when Bucky drags the poor bastard away, you follow right behind him. Not a protest to be heard. Bucky throws open the door we entered through and finds the nearest room before chucking the HYDRA agent inside and locking the door behind you. 

   The room was brightly lit, with all four walls a dull cream color and dark brown couches strewn casually about. There’s no real order to this place. All cement corners and LED bulbs. Pure business. 

   “Let ‘em know,” Bucky orders and you turn around to argue only to find the man pulling a gun out of his jacket pocket.

   You jerk suddenly and kick Bucky square in the stomach, launching him towards one of the couches just as a shot rings out. You blanch at the sound, the noise filling your head and drowning everything else out. You hear yelling but you can’t make out the words, only the panic intermingled within them. Your hand reaches out around you and you grip the small button lined into your thin clothing, pressing it four times how you’d been instructed.

   Everything moved slowly and people began filing into the room. How did they get here so fast? No. It wasn’t possible, they were a quarter mile down the road, there was no way they were your backup. 

   Hands began flying in the air and you were picked up and dropped multiple times, each time landing harder than the last. You tried to blink back the spinning but the blows landing on your face and torso made it all the worse. 

   Instinctively, you threw your hands up to protect your face and fought to find some footing to help. Bucky was good but he wasn’t a God, he would need help. When the first blow met your forearms you reached out to grasp the hand and used your other to drive your fist right into the person’s nose. The bone crunched under your blow.

   You took a hit, then another when you managed to analyze the enemy’s fight pattern and waited until he left himself open before driving your knee into his rib cage. He bent over in pain and you grabbed him by the hair, hearing another crack when you shoved your elbow upwards against his nose. 

   You heard a shout and whipped your head over to see Bucky on his back, a looming figure with a gun aimed straight towards him. You galvanized towards them and threw yourself in the air, using your weight to kick him off of Bucky when another shot rang out. 

   Bucky shot up and crushed the gun with his metal arm. You scoured the room for the familiar HYDRA agent but found him nowhere. You shot out of the room, knocking into an opposing wall as you turned the corner and ducked when the sound of a bullet whizzed past you. 

   This is not going good. You had lost your target and rummaged through room after room until you’d become lost. Fuck. Where the hell did he run off to? You winced after breaking out into a sprint but pressed on, not allowing yourself to slow down. There was no way you were going to fail this mission, especially after coming so close to success.

   Sweat trailed down your face and your muscles screamed at you to halt, their exhaustion beginning to wear you down. Your breathing grew rapid and your vision blurred and just as you went to lean on a wall to rest, your shoulder exploded out in pain and you collapsed with a cry.

   “Dirty whore,” the HYDRA man seethed, a cane raised over his head. He brought it down and you spun to the side, feeling the air breeze past your ear.

   Your hand latched onto the cane and you shoved it into his gut, pushing him away. SHIELD wanted this guy alive, so alive they would receive him. That didn’t mean he had to come in one piece though. 

   You tore the walker out of his hand just as he tumbled onto his ass. You stood up, grunting along the way and hovered over his body, fear sprawled along his features. 

   “You can either stay still or get beat with your own cane, it’s your choice,” you offered, aching to bring the walker down onto his face. “Please test me. Please.” You begged.

   His gaze shifted between you and the weapon and he brought his trembling hands up in defeat. He must’ve been an agent of some Intelligence branch because his fighting abilities were evidently subpar at best.

   You sighed, sad to see the opportunity go but brought the cane down none the less. “That’s unfortunate,”

   You turned your attention to the sound of running coming around the corner and moved to drag and hide your captive in a nearby closet only to roll your eyes when Bucky came ‘round. You tossed the cane back and forth between your hands and smiled proudly towards the agent on the floor.

   “Look who I caught,” you toyed and were met with a grunt.

   “Only because you let him get away,” he retorted, pulling the balding man up to his feet.

   Everything began to slow and the hellfire you’d kept under mounds of ice had finally melted through its freezing cage. “What?”

   He turned his back towards you and trudged the hesitant man behind him towards the exit.

   “I said,” you hollered, not caring how the halls carried your echo, “What?”

   “I heard what you said,” he called back to you, not bothering to turn around.

   And there you were left, frozen and dumbfounded for five solid minutes before you could pull yourself together enough to stomp your way back towards the rendezvous point. You remained hazy for the most part while debriefing. You tried to recount everything but the way your anger engulfed you in its flame obscured your memory so you kept it short. 

   It was quickly brought up that SHIELD captured more HYDRA agents than expected and were gonna be at max capacity so you and Bucky had to stay at a base a few miles down the road. You grumbled in compliance but Bucky didn’t respond, not even a godforsaken grunt.

   What SHIELD had failed to mention though, was that this bunker was clearly meant for one. It barely counted as a room. There was a small bathroom in the corner just big enough for a shower and toilet. No sink. And a small counter with just enough space for a stove, microwave and radio. If you were to lay down vertically or horizontally you’d nearly be touching wall each way. Not to mention the singular bed.

   And that’s how you got to where you were now. Miniscule room. Exhausted body. Drained mind. Patience long gone. 

   You huffed and dropped your bag in front of the entrance before walking to the bathroom and turning to slam the door closed. You turned the faucet on and ripped the wig off, discarding your clothes in a pile before stepping into the shower. The warm water was nice and welcoming but your body already felt aflame so you twisted the knob and held your breath when the cold stream trickled down your body. It was difficult to breathe at first, but your body soon adjusted to the temperature and you began wiping the muck off your skin with the bar of soap supplied. But that’s all the was supplied. Clearly, this place was meant to be a quick pit stop. 

   You sat on the hard floor as the water streamed onto your body. You could nearly fall asleep to its rhythm; It was only when your head hit the wall that you realized you were so you begrudgingly stood up and shut off the water. You grabbed the only towel in the bathroom and pat yourself dry, noticing just then that you left your clothes outside.

   You let out a long sigh and twisted open the doorknob to find Bucky toying with the radio on the counter; not even purposefully, just looking for something to do while he waited. 

   You opened your mouth to ask him to hand you your bag but after what he said to you earlier you’d sooner eat hot coals than ask him to do anything for you. You stepped out of the bathroom, towel wrapped neatly around your chest and you bent over to open your bag. The shuffling on the radio stopped. 

   “You could’ve at least left me some warm water,” he grumbled and you rolled your eyes.

   You searched in your bag for the fresh clothes residing there only to turn around when you found them and have the bathroom door shut in your face. 

   “Are you fucking kidding me?” You shouted, pounding your fist against the door.

   You could hear the water running and you groaned, pounding harder. The door opened for a split second and you were hit in the face with the clothes you’d left inside only for it to instantly be slammed shut again.

   You punched the door with all the frustration built up over the past few hours and felt the wood crack with your force. Why did this man have to be incredibly baffling? You were not nearly paid enough to deal with such an unbearable partner. He would have you bald from stress before you knew it. 

   You spent the next few minutes grumbling to yourself after you changed and scribbled your frustration onto a small notebook you took with you everywhere. It was only when you heard the water shut off did you remember something. You still had the only towel. A villainous smirk tugged at your lips and you placed the folded towel on the edge of the bed, away from the door.

   Then you heard the creak. “I will walk out naked if you don’t give me the towel,” Bucky threatened.

   You shrugged despite him not being able to see you from your position on the bed, “I’ll just laugh at your dick,” 

   “You weren’t laughing earlier,” he shot back.

   Oh. So he did remember. Good. You thought he’d gotten amnesia within the past few hours, maybe he was just too ashamed to mention it.

   “Too disgusted to insult. Plus, I was playing a character,”

   “Fine,” he responded and quickly came into view, haughtily sauntering over to your side and you shouted.

   “Dear God!” You held the towel up to block your sight of his barren body. It was disgusting. He was all wet, hair dripping onto his muscled torso, water gleaming off his taut skin, 5 o’clock shadow drenched and straight out of a wet dream. Jesus.

   “Prude,” he commented, snatching the towel from your grasp and wrapping it around himself. 

   “Respectable,” you corrected, crossing your arms and shoving him away. “You get the floor,”

   He lifted his duffle off the ground and rummaged through it. “Then I get the blanket,”

   “You get fuck all,” you stated, flipping off the lamp beside you and snuggling into the warm cot.

   When the shuffling stopped and the bathroom light was shut off, you shut your eyes and let the wear of the day grab at you, lulling you into the beginning of slumber. That is, until the blanket was hauled from around you, damn near throwing you onto the floor. You shouted out and caught yourself last minute. 

   “Barnes!” You yelled, steadying yourself and reaching over the edge to grab the blanket back. Your hand fisted at the faux fur and you pulled with all your might to no avail. 

   He swatted you away as though you were a pesky fly and reached over to turn the light of the lamp on. You glowered at him and stood, wrapping the blanket around your arm and pulling upwards. Your arm strained to its capacity but the man on the floor didn’t budge. Only turned his back to you and shut his eyes. You reached over yourself and flipped the switch of the lamp, once again immersing yourself in the comforting darkness. 

   Bucky stiffened and opened his eyes then turned and froze you in your spot with his stare. He reached around and lit the lamp, slowly retracting his arm and daring you to turn it off again. So you did.

   He yanked the blanket from your grasp and threw you back onto the bed, bringing light into the room. “Light stays on,” he growled.

   “No! You’ve had your goddamn way since you stepped foot into this room. Light goes off and I get the blanket!” You shouted, not concerned about anyone else hearing considering the room was soundproof.

   “No. You get the bed so I get the blanket. Tell me how that doesn’t make sense,” he countered.

   You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of admitting that it did, in fact, make sense. The floor here was wooden and clearly uncomfortable, plus he hadn’t even argued about the bed situation. 

   You retreated, “Fine, light still goes off,”

   “No,” 

   “Yes,” 

   Silence fell between the two of you but you weren’t budging. Barnes had faced plenty of monsters, he could handle the dark. 

   “I need the noise to fall asleep,” he admitted and it was then you could hear the slight hum the bulb emitted.

   You didn’t speak for a while but reared back and pulled out your phone, “What do you want to listen to?” You scrolled through a few sounds you had stored on your phone, “We’ve got: nature sounds, frequencies, guided meditations, etc. You name it, but I’m not sleeping with this forsaken light on,”

   Bucky studied you, his expression changing a mile a minute but the one of indifference conquered, “Rain,” 

   You nodded once and selected the audio, placing the phone face up on the nightstand and turning the light off for the last time. Hopefully. You hunkered down into the thin mattress and reached down, grasping at the thick blanket. When you pulled, there was some give. He’d let you get just enough needed to cover your body if you laid at the very edge and your hand hovered in the air when you laid your arm over the side.

   Minutes flew by with your eyes shut and the exhaustion slithered over your body but your mind ran wild with the events from earlier. You tried not to get angry or sad or . . . bothered. Your breathing deepened when you began to succumb to your body’s fatigue and you drifted inch by inch into the welcoming void lulling your name.

   You didn’t hear when he shifted, only managed to register the faint tracing of his fingertips on your hand before finally giving out.

   You weren’t sure what time it was when you opened your eyes for the first time that night. This regularly happened. You’d wake up multiple times during the night to shift positions or throw off the sheets, no matter how insignificant the desire, your body always found a way to wake you for it.

   You opened your eyes slowly to a hazy vision and blinked at the sitting figure on the floor, “Bucky?” You croaked, bringing a hand up to wipe at your face, “What time is it?”

   “It’s almost one, go back to sleep,”

   “What are you doing?” You persisted, ignoring his demand and sitting up slowly, “Why aren’t you sleeping?”

   “Couldn’t,” 

   A heartbeat. Then another. And another. He didn’t care to elaborate.

   “Do you want the bed?” You offered, stretching yourself out and already placing yourself down on the floor, “It’s too hot up there, anyway,”

   His attention turned to you for the first time but you’d already began closing your eyes, not really having the energy to argue with him. You could hear shuffling from his spot and the ground disappeared below you, strong hands grasping your body and lifting you up to place you gently back onto the cot.

   “I prefer the floor,” he insisted, wrapping the blanket around you, “Besides, you’re a horrendous liar,”

   You didn’t hold back the singular chuckle, your haze still enveloping you. “Then why aren’t you sleeping?”

   He sat at the foot of the bed, his hand hovering over your leg in hesitation, “It’s complicated.” He dropped his hand to his side.

   “Isn’t the rain helping?” you mumbled, your sight now adjusting to the dark.

   “Yes,”

   “Then what?” 

   “I just . . . don’t want to wake you,”

   “Well, I’m already awake if that makes you feel better,” you jeered, a small smile forming on your lips.

   “It doesn’t,”

   “Nothing does,” you retorted, the inevitable annoyance you always felt when conversing with him already made its way up into your tone.

   He scoffed and stood from the bed, placing himself in the same spot on the floor with his head leaned up against the wall and his arm resting on his perched knee. 

   “Oh, so now you can’t handle a little attitude,” your tone came out incredulous, “You didn’t have any issues earlier when you blamed me for that guy’s escape. Which, he didn’t even get to do, might I add,”

   “I was projecting,” he replied, gaze still focused on the door opposite to him.

   You blinked, “Are you so tired that you’re actually admitting to being a dick?”

   “I know I can be a dick, but you threw yourself straight into the line of fire twice today. So I don’t really give a shit if I was mean to you,”

   “I only did that because you almost got shot twice today. Don’t take your anger out on me for your incompetence. Just say ‘thank you’ and move on already,”

   “Incompetence?” His head jerked in your direction. “What was incompetent was that you couldn’t keep yourself composed,”

   You sat up. “What in the hell are you talking about? My behavior is what got our target to basically give himself up to us! It was me that trapped him, not you!” His composure tensed and you crossed your arms over your chest, “You’re just mad your dick got hard so if anything you’re the one who couldn’t keep their compos-” His hand was wrapped around your throat and you were pinned to the mattress before you could finish your sentence.

   “Shut the fuck up,” he hissed at you, his face mere inches from yours.

   “Why?” You spoke hoarsely around his tightening grip, “Does the Big Bad Wolf not like that he was turned on? Who’s the prude now?”

   “Turned on?” He spat, his free hand resting by your head to cage you in, “You think what you did earlier turned me on?”

   You grasped at the hand around your throat and pried slightly to speak, “Fight me or fuck me, Barnes. But stop lying to yourself, it’s getting old,”

   The room seemed to freeze over and Bucky paused. His hesitation was enough to elicit the fire from earlier and your legs squirmed a little underneath him. God, you hoped he chose the latter.

   Then his lips crashed against yours. 

   You squeaked at the sudden onslaught but threw your arms around his shoulders and pulled him in tighter against you. He dropped when you intertwined your legs, his full weight pressing against you deliciously. You ground up against him, your core aching from the previous hours and the small friction elicited a moan from the both of you. 

   “So impatient,” he scolded, bringing the hand from around your throat down to your hips and pressing you into the bed. “What a whore,”

   His breath danced along your cheek and you mewled at his words. Gods, he was going to be the death of you. Or the beginning. 

   You breathed in deeply, his sandalwood scent intoxicating you in a manner that alcohol never could. When you drank, you were just drunk. But when you took a sip from the tall glass that was Bucky, it brought you to life. Your body sang melodies wherever you were plastered against each other and your skin burned with need.

   Touch me, your body screamed, touch me.

   “Fuck off,” you groaned and Bucky jerked your head to the side, exposing your neck for him to scavenge.

   The goosebumps that danced across your skin when he ran his warm tongue up from the curve of your neck to the bottom of your ear brought an arrogant smirk onto Bucky’s face. You ran your fingers through his hair and tugged when he reached a particularly sensitive spot that had your legs shaking when he kissed it sloppily. 

   Your mouth hung open in silent pleasure and your breaths were short and rapid, your body betraying all forms of control you previously had over yourself. The hand that wasn’t residing in his hair trailed down his muscled arm and you gripped at the brawn this man possessed. His skin reminisced lightly of silk despite the rough texture of his hands. 

  The same hands that now made its way into your hair and tugged at the strands at the base of your neck, jolting your chin higher into the air. Your grip tightened around his biceps and the strength they emitted sent a pool rushing to your core. You continued hunting until you found the hem of his black, cotton shirt and you made your way up his taut abdomen. You let out a sigh and he jumped lightly at the sensation of your cool fingertips across his scorching skin. It was a nice contrast for him. 

   You gripped at the shirt and hastily ripped the cotton upward. Bucky broke away from his descent down to your chest to let you remove the fabric and you’d suddenly wished you’d turned the lights on first. He mimicked your action and tossed your shirt in a deserted corner of the room to potentially be abandoned. You gasped when the cold air of the room grazed upon the perked mounds of your breasts. 

   His lips returned to their spot on the dip of your neck and his tongue slithered down in between your breasts. Your breath hitched when his wet muscle made its way up to the apex of your chest. His right hand mirrored his tongue and swirled around your nipple, his teeth pulling eagerly every so often and you hissed at the delectable pain. Your eyes devoured the scene unfolding on your chest and you reached over to flick the light on, desperate for a clearer image.

   Bucky halted and his metal arm reached over to switch the light back off but you swatted his hand away and he backed up lightly, his irritation evident on his face.

   “I want to watch,” you grumbled and shifted up to bring your lips back up to his. He let you. He pushed back lightly with his own lips and leaned in sync with your movements. He parted his mouth slightly and you followed suit, letting him lead his way into yours with the same muscle he’d just had flicking across your breasts.

   The light went off.

   You pushed him away and shot towards the switch but metal met your wrist firmly enough to keep you in place. “Bucky.” You wrestled against his hold and turned your full attention back to the figure hovering above, “I want to see you,” 

   Despite the darkness, you noticed his mouth twitch but his grip on your wrist remained solid. You sprawled back onto the bed and wrapped your free hand around the back of his neck and pulled him down onto you, pressing his surprisingly soft lips onto yours. You broke apart, his lips a hair’s breadth away from your own. “I want to see you,” 

   He didn’t move, only scanned your face over a few times and you brought him back down into a kiss. This one wasn’t like before. This one was warm, soft, patient. A ballet compared to its previous mosh pit. He danced along with you, an admission hidden somewhere in his tenderness.

   You hadn’t realized you’d been freed of his hold until you were wrapping that arm over his shoulder and the sound of a light humming began.

   “Fucker,” you jeered and the previous gentleness dissipated.

   “Shut up,” he ordered, pinning you back onto the bed and resumed his ministration on your breasts.

   The moan slipped past your lips at the sight and your chest heaved upwards, desperate for more stimulation. You licked your lips at how his mouth encased your nipple, his tongue flicking against the perked skin and you dropped your head back, shutting your eyes. You centered all of your attention anywhere that his bare skin touched your body and rubbed your aching clit against his v-line. 

   Your chest was pressed against the mattress before you could register what happened and the hard smack that met your ass evoked a yelp. Bucky pressed fully against your backside and he ground his dick down into your ass. He groaned at the sensation and you raised your ass onto him. You yelped again when Bucky ripped your leggings down and smacked the exposed skin on your ass.

   “Try something like that again and I’ll gag you around my cock ‘til you’re crying,” he growled, “Understood?”

   You nodded, wide-eyed and a mewling mess from the threatening promise of this God. 

   “Good girl,” he cooed, rubbing at the raw skin. “Now stay still for Daddy,”

  Bucky’s hand lingered on your reddening ass and the mattress dipped when he shifted to your side. He traced gentle circles onto your backside and pressed his lips on your shoulder blade, the butterfly kisses making their way down towards your spine and then lower. Your breathing grew uneven from the sheer amount of restraint you displayed. Your grip on the edge of the bed tightened when his tongue dragged from the point where your thigh and ass met all the way up to the bottom of your spine.

   “Fuck,” You shuddered, white-knuckling the blanket beneath you.

   Your skin blazed when you were met with another harsh slap. You mewled at the sensation, loving the fire that spread across your flesh and relaxed when his metal hand cooled the area. 

   Then his teeth bit into the cooling flesh and you jerked away despite yourself. Bucky tsked lowly and you chuckled at the hint of fear sprouting in your chest; you did not want to see whatever sinister expression resided on his face. 

   A strong hand gripped the roots of your hair and hauled you up. You followed his direction and knelt onto the ground between Bucky’s sprawled out legs, settling in your new position.

   “Oh, Doll,” he chastised, “you were so close,”

   “That shouldn’t count,” you retorted while Bucky pulled the blanket off the bed and lifted you up with his metal arm, shoving the barrier between your knees and the hard ground.

   “But it does.” His hands dove into his underwear and sprung his cock out onto your lips. “Now get to work,”

   Your eyes widened at the sight before you and you had to physically hold back from gulping. You were ashamed to admit your mouth watered in anticipation. You lifted your hands from his sculpted thighs and wrapped them around his length, enveloping just the tip past your parted lips. Bucky sighed and twitched in your mouth.

   You welcomed him in fully, or as much as you could anyway, and got straight to work, not bothering to act abashed at your desire. Your tongue swirled around his tip and you leaned into him until he hit the back of your mouth but you continued on, gagging around him when he’d gotten inside your throat. Bucky groaned when your throat tightened around him and he threw his head back, using his flesh hand to guide you up and down his shaft, showing you what he liked and didn’t. 

   “Fuck, Doll,” he groaned, “Just how I imagined your mouth would feel,”

   You pulled off him to comment when he shoved you all the way down to the hilt and you threw your hands up onto his thighs to hold yourself back. He used his metal arm to hold himself up and thrusted up into your salivating mouth desperately. He continuously hit the back of your throat and thick saliva coated his cock. Just as he promised, tears prickled at the corners of your eyes and he didn’t stop until your cheeks were drenched in the liquid.

   You let your jaw hang open, your tongue no longer swiveling around meticulous spots that you knew would make his legs buckle. No, you let him have the reigns. Let him fuck your mouth ‘til your throat grew bruised and jaw ached with fatigue. You committed his cries of pleasure to memory, the sounds euphoric to your ears. 

   He lifted his head and stared down at you with half-closed eyes. He was in heaven and you knew it. He watched you, how the tears trailed down, how your hands gripped at his thighs, how you stuck out your tongue just as you’d made it to the base of his cock to lick his balls in the most intoxicating way. Fuck. You were the intoxicating one. You brought out this side of him. This carnal desire that became him until he’d had to step out of the room just to compose himself. And he didn’t like being out of control. That’s why he always kept you at an arm’s distance.

   But now, watching as you sat between him with your mouth agape like the good girl that you were for him, he knew he’d never deny himself this pleasure again. Especially since you were so fucking good at it.

   He groaned, pulling you off his cock and grabbed tightly at your cheeks, nearly pinching your mouth together. “Tongue out.” He growled, waiting for your compliance.

   Your jaw ached with exhaustion but you managed to stick out the wet muscle as he pulled you closer into him and watched when he parted his lips above you, letting the saliva trail down from his mouth into yours. 

   “Swallow,” he ordered.

   But it was already done, and you left your mouth hanging open for more.

   “Jesus fucking Christ,” Bucky grumbled, putting his face right up against yours and feeding you once again; this time with a sloppy kiss that coated both your mouths in saliva.

   He brought you up from the floor and tossed you onto the bed before settling between your legs. The excitement in your eyes grew and he indulged in every minute of it. Bucky’s hand trailed down from your lower abdomen right above your pubic bone and pressed his palm into your neglected clit. The cry you let out was the unholiest thing he’d ever heard. 

   He slid his finger under the waistband of your underwear and flitted his gaze back up to your eyes, “Can I?”

   You nodded eagerly, dumbfounded that he would even ask and fought the temptation to grab your phone from the nightstand and record everything that was about to unfold. 

   At the first nod, Bucky slid your underwear down your legs and made a show of bringing the material up to his face. Your own went red hot and you hid behind your hands, poking through every millisecond to shamefully watch. He threw the panties into his open duffel and you squirmed in anticipation.

   “Remember the rules?” Bucky asked, brow lifted and already descending to your inner thigh.

   You nodded again.

   “I need to hear it, Doll,” he mumbled, kissing the inner part of your thigh, each placement closer and closer to where you needed him most.

   “Yes,” you whimpered out, “I remember the rules,”

   Bucky wanted to dive right in, he really did, but the way you sprawled yourself out so vulnerable for him, it incited a new pace that he wanted to follow. So, he did. He looked at you for a few moments, watched how the anticipation danced in your eyes, how your legs shook in wait and how you were already so goddamn wet for him.

   “This all for me?” he teased, mesmerized at your desire for him.

   You dropped a hand down to your side, near where his hands were wrapped around your thighs to keep you in place - and against his face. He cocked his head to the side, waiting for your answer.

   You nodded sheepishly and when he lifted an eyebrow in mock confusion you said, “You. Just you,”

   Like music to his ears. Just him. You weren’t for anyone else. He thought he felt his heart palpitate.

   He lowered himself down to your core and kissed your lip, drawing a desperate plea from you. You couldn’t wait anymore, couldn’t deal with the teasing. You were wet enough, needy enough, ready enough to take him, all of him. You’d been ready damn near the moment you first laid eyes on his arrogant smirk.

   “Buck - please,” you cried, drawling out the final word.

   The first kiss placed upon your soaked cunt erupted a sigh of relief and you laid back on the pillow, your eyes closed and mind gone with the sensation of those sloppy kisses blessing your needs. He flattened his tongue on your lips and licked upwards, stopping when your hips twitched into his mouth.

   “Sorry!” You apologized, fighting the desire to grind into his wet muscle. He’d just gotten started and you certainly didn’t want it to end so soon.

   He lifted his gaze up to you and you bit into your fist at the view, using the extremity to hold back your moans. He flicked his attention down again and repeated his motion, lapping at your fluids ‘til his beard was soaked in it. He shook his head into your cunt and his nose rubbed along your clit. The mewling that left your mouth urged him on and when you felt his muscle prodding at your entrance you threw your head back.

   “Please, Bucky.” You begged, bringing a hand up to tease your nipple.

   He prodded some more, his tongue gliding up from your clit and back down to your entrance, poking through enough to frustrate you. He wanted you to break for him. To lose all composure and control and just let him. He wanted you to submit to him but it wasn’t just that, it was more that he wanted to destroy you for any future experience you may have without him. He wanted you to come back to him, to need him, to beg for him and leave you with the understanding that nothing - no one - could compare to him. He wanted you. To himself. 

   So, when he could no longer refrain and had to use his metal arm to hold your hips down from squirming beneath him, he slipped two thick, rough fingers into your begging cunt. And the sound you emitted caused that carnal instinct to claw at the barriers caging it in.

   Your hand shot down, tangling itself into his hair and pushing him harder against you. He allowed it. Your thighs held him in place, crushing him with your soft skin and he groaned at the warmth you gave off. You pulled your hand away from your mouth and grabbed at his metal one resting on your pubic bone, pulling it up to your chest and wrapping his fingers on the sensitive bud for him to tease. He slowly retracted from your chest and brought it back down onto your hips and you huffed in annoyance. You looked down at Bucky but his eyes were shut, completely engrossed in the feast before him. You bucked when his fingers glazed across that sensitive spot inside your velvety walls.

   “There!” You cried, your fist tightening in his hair when the all-too-familiar wave of ecstasy began to pool together, waiting for its release.

   Bucky complied, dragging the pads of his fingers up against that spot over and over again. Your legs caged him in tighter as his tongue swirled over the hyper-sensitive bundle of nerves and you cried out at the way your body tensed.

   “Fuck,” you cried, your hands desperately grasping onto Bucky’s metal wrist and tugging at the roots of his hair. Bucky’s groan of pleasure was what tipped you over the edge.

   You gasped when the pool building released, your body shaking with euphoria and the flood crashed down onto you. And apparently, onto Bucky as well. He pulled his mouth away but continued rubbing at your clit when warm liquid squirted onto his face and his expression of surprise mirrored your own.

   When Bucky looked up at you, your face burned with embarrassment and you threw your head back, using your hand to cover your countenance. Not to mention the sight of him with your juices all over his mouth was one of the hottest things you’d ever witnessed.

   Bucky chuckled at your sheepish apology and removed your hand from your face, bringing his soaked mouth up to yours and having you taste yourself. You devoured each other, your arms wrapped tightly around the other, pulling so fiercely at the innate desire to become one in shared pleasure. He could feel his pride swell at your hidden confession. You’d never squirted before and he was lucky enough to be the one to give you that experience for the first time. 

   You clawed at him, divulging in the warmth his body radiated and intoxicating yourself in everything that was Bucky. You couldn’t get enough of it, of him. It was nearly too much.

   His hand trailed up to your gaping mouth and he inserted his fingers, “Clean them,” he ordered.

   Your hand gripped his wrist and pulled his fingers deeper into your mouth, never breaking eye contact with him, loving the way he ate up everything he was seeing. You noticed the way he swallowed.

   He retracted his hand and wrapped it gently behind your head so you were resting on him. He brought his full weight down onto your body and a warmth emanated in your chest when he brought his lips up against your forehead, each kiss closer and closer to your lips until they met their destination. When you parted your mouth against his, it wasn’t merely an action of carnal desire, it was like you were exchanging life forces. Merging and meeting in a manner that had your body exploding and crying out for more of the faint familiarity. Like seeing an old friend for the first time in years.

   Bucky looked down between your bodies at where you were about to connect before staring back up at you, taking you in as if he would never have this opportunity again. His thumb brushed your cheek and came to a rest on your bottom lip. “Ready?”

   You chuckled, “Fuck me,”

   He shoved inside in one clean motion and a breath of pleasure slid past both of your lips.

   “Fuck,” he groaned, his hand tightening slightly around your neck and he pulled out slowly then shot back inside and you moaned.

   You were still so sensitive from your previous climax that every brush against your clit sent you into a whirlwind of pleasure, the sensations shooting through every nerve in your body. 

   “Bucky,” you whined when his pace quickened and the sheer force of his thrusts drove you deeper into euphoria.

   He filled you just right, his girth and length impressive and you wondered why you hadn’t tried to screw him earlier. He slid past your tight walls, each thrust causing the room to echo with the sounds of skin slapping and moans of ecstasy. 

   He kept his actions controlled, not wanting to build up to something so intense just for it to fall short and end fast. No. Despite how good you felt wrapped around his aching and swollen cock, despite how warm and welcoming you were, how you spread yourself out for him to consume, he had to leash himself. This was going to be just as good for you as it was for him. 

   He kissed you one last time before gripping the back of your knees and bringing your thighs up to your chest, a shout of praise falling off your lips. He was drunk on the sight of his cock going in and out of your cunt and he threw his head back with a groan.

   “What a fucking pretty pussy,” he breathed out and you whimpered, biting your lip at the welcome profanities.

   At this angle, he was fucking against your g-spot and using his pubic bone to rub against your clit and watching the thin layer of sweat sheen off his skin was all too much to keep yourself put together. His eyebrows scrunched together and you caught him taking in your form, watching how your pleasure displayed itself on your face for him to bear witness to. Only him.

   He growled at the intrusion of thoughts that came to him. He pictured someone else in his position, someone else witnessing you so vulnerable and open to them, someone else fucking you and making you beg for them. It disgusted him. He brought his torso down and latched his teeth to your neck, biting down hard enough to have you tearing up.

   “Mine,” he growled into your ear and lulled his head forward when you tightened around him.

   A sinister smirk came to his face and he licked the shell of your ear, your breathy moans feeding him, “You like that?” He asked, pistoling further into your cunt and you shouted at the increase of pace, “You like when I tell you who you belong to?”

   Your mouth hung agape and the one arm wrapped around his shoulder pulled him closer to you, your desperation for his warmth taking control. “Fuck . . . off,” you hissed between breaths.

   He pulled out and yanked you up by your hair, twisting you around and pressing your torso into the wall but keeping your ass propped up for him to admire. You hissed at the pain when a sharp smack met your ass and your hands gripped at the wall for any way to ground yourself and prevent from becoming putty in his hands.

   Another hard smack met your ass and you lurched forward to get away from the sting. Bucky kept your head pinned to the cement, his hand holding your cheek from scraping the wall but applying a pressure that had your tongue lolling out of your mouth. 

   You moaned at the intrusion in your pussy and he plummeted in and out, a mix of your grunts and groans bouncing around the room. His pace constantly changed. One second it was fast, the next it was slow but filling, going so far as to hit your cervix a few times and leave you a crying mess under his hold. Your shoulder scraped along the wall and you fought to push away only to have your chest slammed harder against the cement.

   You brought a hand out, reaching behind yourself and grasping for Bucky’s hip, pushing him deeper into you when he slowed. Your nails dug into his flesh and the sound of his hiss shot straight to your core. 

   “What a goddamn whore,” he spat, bringing his teeth down onto your neck and you gripped at his hair.

   You laughed at his statement, “You’re the one that can’t get enough of this pussy. Why so desperate to claim it? Afraid I'll fuck someone else?” Bucky pulled you back and slammed you against the wall with vigor, causing you to flinch

   He stopped his thrusts altogether, “My patience only goes so far, Doll,” he threatened, tugging at your hair and you bit back a cry, “Choose your words wisely,”

   You nodded hastily, the rough texture of the wall digging into your cheek and splitting skin. You wriggled up against him to continue moving but he retracted completely and flipped you over so he was laying on the bed and you were straddling him.

   “Move,” he ordered, his hands digging bruises into your waist.

   You leaned over, pressing your chest against his to lift your hips up and down on him but he pushed you back up and held your arms behind your back to keep you in place. You whimpered but the cry quieted when you rubbed your clit against him and your pussy clenched at the friction. You moaned out a breathy fuck and swiveled your hips around his, noting how much deeper he filled you in this position.

   “Buck-” you huffed, eyes glued to the glistening abs beneath you. “I’m gonna cum,”

   “Already?” He jeered, an eyebrow raised in amusement.

   You’d lost all energy to sneer at him, your focus solely on how the sensation grew and began pooling in your cunt. “Cock . . . so good,” you breathed out, barely able to keep yourself from melting into him.

   “What was that, Doll?” He stilled your movements and you groaned in annoyance.

   You wriggled in his hold and you could tell by the furrow of his brow that he was fighting to keep control as well. You leaned over him, your lips hovering over his, “Mine,”

   His grip flew to the back of your neck and he crashed your lips onto his, giving you full reign again. You bounced your hips on his dick, slamming down vigorously and rubbing your clit in effect. It didn’t take long for your climax to build again.

   “’M gonna . . .” you whispered and Bucky placed you back up, gripping your hips and swiveling you around how you were earlier.

   “Cum, Doll,” he allowed, “Cum all over this cock,”

   You cried out, your toes curling as the dam in your core snapped and your climax washed over you. You hadn’t realized your fingers were intertwined with Bucky's until you came back down from your high, your chest heaving for breath.

   He sat up slowly and pressed his lips against your neck. “You’re beautiful,”

   Your body tensed at his words and you pulled away to give him a look of confusion. But he didn’t take his statement back, only slipped his hands around your back and gently placed you onto the bed, hovering over you.

   He moved with caution, like his gentleness might scare you off if he touched you too tenderly or stared too long in admiration. But he couldn’t help it, he did admire you.

   He spread your legs open and nestled between them, pushing into you slowly until your hips met and you both breathed out. His movements weren’t nearly as brutal as they were earlier, these thrusts were slow and deep and full of intention. He brought his torso down onto yours and you wrapped your legs around his waist, bringing him closer to you.

   He ran his hand, the only one he allowed himself to touch you affectionately with, through your hair and stared down at you, waiting. His gaze shifted between your lips to your eyes and he ran his thumb delicately along your mouth.

   You looked at him then, really looked at him with fresh eyes and your heart leapt into your throat at the realization. “Kiss me,” you whispered and he lowered himself onto your lips, setting off an explosion in your chest.

   “I’m yours,” he whispered, not able to bring himself to look at you, “I’ve been yours,”

   You opened your mouth to respond but he silenced you with a deep thrust and a moan erupted instead. He quickened his pace, watching where you connected and pushed deeper and harder, your cries of pleasure driving him. He had to fuck you, he couldn’t love you, he couldn’t make love to you, just fuck. That’s it. He couldn’t allow himself to replay your look of shock at his confession, though the scene would surely be on loop for the next few days until he could get over it. Just fuck. Nothing more. Not with that look of disbelief on your face.

   He held himself up with his forearms but you pressed him against you and wrapped your legs tighter around him. “Harder,” you whispered and he complied.

   He groaned when your tits bounced and brought his mouth to a nipple, the faint taste of sweat lingering on your skin. You brought his metal hand up to your chest and made him grip the flesh there but he pulled it back and placed it beside your head instead.

   “Bucky,” you whimpered and grabbed his hand again, bringing his open palm up to your lips and placing delicate kisses on the metal. “You can feel with it, right?”

   He nodded, hesitance sprawled on his face.

   “Then touch me,” you urged, bringing the hand down between your bodies and pressing the cold metal against your clit, “Feel me,”

   His brows furrowed slightly but the look of your certainty forced him to dismiss his own perceptions of his body; or rather, that arm. And when he began rubbing circles into your bundle of nerves the expression on your face made him hate it a little less. Only a little.

   You stared up at him, his pace growing erratic and sloppy and you knew he was close. “You wanna cum?” 

   He nodded, his hot breath coming out haggard and strained. You placed your hand on his cheek and brought him up to your kiss.

   “Then cum,” 

   He shook his head, “You first,” he swirled his finger around your swollen clit and you gasped at the force of his thrust.

   Your body tensed and you centered all your focus on his ministrations, “A little more pressure,” you directed and he quickly found a pressure that had you wobbling in the knees. “Close,” you murmured, gripping Bucky’s side and bringing your lips up to his neck to pepper the skin there.

   He groaned and judging by the way his dick twitched inside you, you knew he wasn’t far behind. 

   “Bucky,” you whispered, pulling his attention towards you and his gaze brought you closer to the edge, “I’m yours,”

   He blinked and his pace faltered for half a beat. He examined your facial expression, like he didn’t believe the words you’d spoken. Not like he couldn’t believe them, but like you’d said them just to appease him. 

   You placed your forehead against his, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath to center yourself in the haze of this fucking. “Yours,” you repeated, all the emotion residing in your chest poured into the singular word. 

   And then he was back to drilling you into the mattress, a new vigor fueling his thrusts. You cried out and Bucky pressed his sweaty torso flat against your own and it felt like the essence, the being, in your chest intermingled with his own and all the climaxes you’d previously experienced couldn’t hold a match to the flame, the intensity, the rawness of the one that washed over the both of you in that moment.

   Bucky moaned out, his hips bucking into yours and you rode out both of your highs. The sensation consuming and overwhelming and welcome on both ends as it flooded through your bodies, meeting at your point of contact.

   His arms flexed above you with the ferocity of his climax and the display had you writhing beneath him, already desperate for more.

   “Buck,” you whispered when his breathing evened out after he collapsed onto you.

   He didn’t respond, afraid it had all been a dream, a trick, despite still being inside you. He didn’t want to move, didn’t want to shatter the perfection of this moment. What if you’d only said that to get him to finish faster? What if you’d only fed him what he wanted to hear? What if-

   “Buck,” you repeated, pulling him from his daze and he lifted his head only slightly. You gripped his chin lightly and forced him to look you in the eye. “You’re . . . mine?”

   He wanted to shake his head, to tell you that he got caught up in the moment but instead he said, “Yours,” because he knew anything else would be a lie and he was tired of lying.

   You studied him and nodded, “Yours,” you stated, already rolling your eyes from the smirk forming on his face, “Unfortunately,”

   He brought your face to his and planted a tender kiss on your lips. He started shifting his position and grabbed the underwear he’d been wearing earlier before pulling out and using the cloth to clean the mess pooling out of you. But not before taking a mental picture, of course. 

   After a few minutes of laying together, his hand playing with a few strands of hair, you felt the warm welcome of sleep beginning to drag you into its embrace. You opened your eyes groggily and looked up at Bucky who was already looking down at you, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

   “I know about your night terrors,” you whispered and his actions halted momentarily before returning to brush through your hair, “I hear you sometimes. And I understand why you don’t want to go to sleep but,” you sat up slowly and placed the thick blanket down on the floor, dragging the pillow down with you and patting the open space beside you, “you should rest. I’ll be here to calm you or stay up with you. Whichever one you need,”

   He didn’t move at first, his ears drowning out any thought he could have while processing what you’d said. He’d stayed silent so long you’d thought you’d crossed a line.

   “I can always sleep on the bed if you’d prefer, though,”

   Bucky shook himself from his thoughts and edged closer to the floor, slowly descending into the available space and wrapping the blanket around the both of you as much as he could. “No,” he said, “I want you here,”

   You hummed in response and snuggled into his waiting arms, lightly wrapping your own around him, making sure to kiss the part of himself he hated the most before fatigue swept you up into its clutches. Bucky followed soon after.