#hyj is so funny HELP ME

[unstoppablelove]

😭😭😭😭😭😭

[ateezgf]

twt stays are so exhausting to witness 😵‍💫

[wovenstarlight]

rambling thoughts about hyj (canon vs ywbk)

yoojin is so so fascinating as a character to me... i think about him 24/7 he occupies every available inch of brainspace i have. like this man and his issues am i fucking right. so i’m going to talk a bit about how i see him working and how i chose to portray him in my time travel series

so canon hyj, right. he’s like. he’s such a funky narrator. he’s like if i occupy my mind with endless work i will avoid falling into the pit of depression and immense grief from all that i went through pre regression. but also what i went through pre regression wasn’t even that bad. but also everyone who hurt me back then is assholes. but anyway ignore all that because i have work to do.

and on top of that the way he interacts with people is very... i won’t say it’s utilitarian but he’s very focused on what he can do for people and what they can do for him. in a currently-unpublished but translated chapter, he says that (SPOILERS!) he’s asked his thoughts on shj, and he answers that sung hyunjae is a useful man, and yoojin has to be polite to him on the off chance he needs to rely on him in the future. a very “he’s useful” kind of answer. this despite the obvious chemistry he and shj have-- not even in a romance way (though i do like jinjae), they just? get along? they banter easily and they have similar senses of humour and even though sometimes hyj gets exasperated at his behaviour, he still chats with him in a friendly way all the same.

and yet he’s also like SHJ Is Useful And That’s It. I Don’t Like Him At All. and he saves him in his contacts as “skill” and generally acts like he’s completely uncaring. which, compared to how much love he has for hyh and then for byr, i understand- shj at the moment quite honestly does not rank up there at all compared to those two? but he does rank somewhere, i think, because then hyj gets annoyed and upset when shj doesn’t show up to help him, and past a “shit, i needed his specific skillset for this situation and now i’m not sure how to manage this”, he does react in a very... i’ve been let down by someone i had high hopes for, kind of way.

so basically he’s got this whole, i don’t care about people1, thing going on, but then he also very much does care. and hyj is a caring person! fuck, shj even says to hyh at one point that han yoojin-gun has a bad habit of letting people into his heart too easily. what that tells me is that hyj has like.... SEVERE trust issues. he won’t allow himself to care about people, to be aware of any feelings he holds towards people- he makes himself only think about the skills people offer him, about how he can use them. and even then, whenever possible, he does things himself and he avoids relying on others, sometimes because he “doesnt want to bother them [with adult matters]” (that one talk with yoohyun) and sometimes because he just doesn’t really trust them with whatever needs doing

1. as an aside i do think hyj’s moral sense is very funny because like. if anyone touches his fucking kids they’re as good as dead! he’ll kill them! he cares about no one but his kids and everyone else can die! [the world is in danger] ah, fuck, maybe he cares about people who aren’t his kids. he doesn’t want the world to die. but don’t BRING IT UP!!! JEEZ!!! HIS PRIDE!!!! but also if you get blacklisted for whatever reason then Die literally Die he will kill you himself. it’s a very funny, he’s a good person but oh, he’s also a little bit insane, actually. that sort of situation. i love him. go crazy go stupid, sweetie, you’re doing great.

WHICH IN CONTEXT MAKES A LOT OF SENSE, WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT PRE REGRESSION! like hyj was raised with the experience of his parents, the people in the world whose unconditional support he was meant to have, being tossed down the drain because he chose to take care of yoohyun. so he’s already like, yeah, i gotta rely on myself. he has that understanding that.... he’s gotta rely on himself first and foremost, rather than trusting people who are supposed to be taking care of him. not just caring for him, actually, caring for him and yoohyun, because then he basically has to dedicate his life to yoohyun growing up. he’s been acting as yoohyun’s primary guardian from age Baby. and age 17 to 22 was literally just him dropping everything he was doing for himself in favor of getting a job and making sure yoohyun stayed in school and was fine. yoojin himself dropped out of school so he must’ve lost his whole friend group and support system. and then post-dungeon shock, he gets thrown aside and pretty much discarded by yoohyun without so much as a goodbye from the kid, which-- wow! ouch! that shit must have hurted! talk about being fucking burned, jeez. and even after that, spending three years running after yoohyun, trying to “regain” his trust and love, yoojin would’ve seen his Unawakened self as ‘not good enough’ for s-rank yoohyun. and therein comes the “if it’s not useful it’s worthless” mindset. and then he Awakened as f-rank-- already a blow!-- and then on top of that he gets backstabbed by the dozens of people who were like “you’re an s-rank’s brother! go get Awakened, i’ll bet money on you Awakening to a good rank!” and then pulled out on him, leaving him with idk how much debt (this is all mentioned in early chapters somewhere, i’ll pull citations later). man, i’m not surprised he has trust issues.

so that’s already part of his difficulty trusting other people. but then it gets compounded when you think about it further because like, His Fucking Skills, Man. he has a whole skill focused around “if you make an emotional connection with someone and then they die, it’s useful to you.” holy fuck! no wonder he’s allergic to bringing people into battle alongside himself! no wonder he throws himself into dungeons solo just to get freebie skills that allow him to be some semblance of independently combat-ready! every time he makes a connection with people he’s wondering if one day he’ll get their dying memories! you ever wonder how many people he had on his list of “keyworded individuals” pre-reg? he’s stated that he used to be at the back of dungeon parties with a spear (the need for weapons with a longer reach because of his low defense, obviously) and so someone else always died before he did? how many teammates that he cared about has he watched die in front of himself, how many times has he gotten the dying memories of those teammates, how many times have the rest of his living teammates turned on him after finding out his ability and accused him of getting the dead person killed on purpose so that he could have their skills? like hyj brings it up when he’s first explaining last repayment, and hyj cares about people so easily that he’d never do it and yet he still thought of it. which means other people would undoubtedly think of it very easily. and they wouldn’t be as forgiving when there’s a body count right there.

just, last repayment basically took hyj’s (largely yoohyun-induced) fear of losing the people he cared about and slammed his head directly into a concrete wall. thanks for that, king. so now hyj forces himself to constantly asses people on a “what skills do they have? how useful are they to me?” basis if they try to get close to him, rather than allowing him to just go “friend :-) i care them“. and it makes him reluctant to get close to and rely on people, because again, Danger Lies Therein

and all of this also must have made him be used to... being unloved, i guess (from his perspective- yoohyun cared, even when he left, but yoojin didn’t know that until yoohyun died). because most if not all of the people who have cared about or pretended to care about him have later left him. he’s got abandonment issues up the wazoo. when people say they care about him (stw, shj) he reacts with distrust. when he reveals the slightest imperfection he’s convinced they‘ll leave him, regardless of how much kindness he’s shown them in the meantime-- remember when he told myeongwoo he’d lied about them being childhood friends? complete confusion that myeongwoo didn’t immediately renounce their friendship. (SPOILERS FOR UNPUBLISHED CHAPTERS!) and later, it happens again with yerim- he tells her that he wasn’t actually a friend of her parents, he just wanted to poach her for haeyeon-- and then wonders why she doesn’t react with betrayal, when what she says is “i’m glad! ahjussi was so kind to me, i was worried i’d bewitched him somehow. i’m glad he actually cares about me. it makes me happy you were so kind”. he expects to lose the people he cares about, if not by outside causes, then of their own volition.

though on the outside causes front, i suppose it does help that like, all the people he’s growing close to now are hypercompetent high-rankers and therefore less likely to get themselves hurt. versus last timeline’s f-rank and e-rank friends, who’d probably routinely get killed, rip. but then there lies the possibility of yoojin thinking “if i pull them into danger then they’re in that much more danger” (see: Literally The Whole Reason Pre-reg Yoohyun Died. he went to help hyj and got in over his head trying to defend hyj and keep hyung alive, when he should’ve been able to defend himself with ease. hyj and diarma both acknowledge this.) which, again, plays into the reason he tries to avoid relying on other people.

tl;dr hyj’s interpersonal relationships are fucked!

but anyways moving on to talk about my fic versions of canon yoojin (hyj): han hyunjae (hhj) and han yoojin jr. (hyj jr). and how i’ve given them both problems disorders based on hyj’s issues

so like right off the bat we have hhj’s major issue, repeatedly brought up in-fic-- his issue with relying on people. let me pull a quote about this from the author notes of ywbk chapter 11:

some of you might be wondering why the yoojins are so [pretends to be okay and centers self on taking care of others], particularly [hhj]. my thinking for that part was mostly... in canon we see yoojin surrounded by people he knows are competent and capable, almost all of them adults. even when he's "raising" them, he has some degree of confidence in their ability to watch out for themselves. plus he's had time to grow out of being the only one in charge of the family; he's seen his brother come into his own and he's pulled back from his caretaking role

but here, [hhj]'s been directly thrust into raising two kids (and yeah even if [hyj jr]'s 18 he's still very much a child). not only that, but his knowledge of the future makes him (in his eyes) more knowledgable than just about all the folks around him, even the adults. mostly, he doesn't want to drop all his baggage on them when he knows they won't be able to relate (and in some cases, he doesn't want them to live with that knowledge). so he kind of distanced himself from everyone and pushed himself further into the caretaking thing as a way of coping, without realizing that's what he was doing.

we have hhj who, as hyj’s au twin, has the same trust issues and forced utilitarian attitude rising from pre-reg experiences. and then we dropped him into a situation where that “prioritize work and handle all issues myself” attitude is-- i don’t want to say rewarded, exactly, but it’s definitely useful for him in the timeline he’s in. he’s the oldest han brother, so handling issues naturally falls to him anyway as the head of the family; with both boys in school, he’s the breadwinner of the family, so prioritizing work is good! he becomes a super-efficient worker and it satisfies the needs of everyone around him!

unfortunately yoojin is a caring person, so hyj jr realizes that hhj is very much overreaching when he’s not even begun to address the effects of the Very Obvious In A Non-Dungeon World pre-reg trauma. so he’s like. hyung. what the FUCK, dude. take it easy and rely on people once in a while.

and physically, sure, hhj can rely on them. he can get yoohyun to do chores, he can get junior to take on a part time job so funds aren’t a constant worry. he gets better at trusting them to manage regular life stuff, honestly! he’s pretty good about that sort of thing now!

but then it comes to emotional needs, and like, hyj jr is a kid? and hyh is a kid? so any trust hhj builds there is going to be a little one-sided, since he can’t dump all his emotional worries on children. whatever yoojin is, he is a good caretaker who addresses his kids’ needs, and the kids do not need to be hhj’s therapists.

and hhj doesn’t really have friends his own age, and even when he does (hello jiyeon and hamin and orv gang), none of them can quite- Get it, because there’s not really an easy way to explain “i have deep-seated trauma about my family leaving me and about the people around me dying brutally” without, uh, (a) a LOT of trusting them to take you seriously and not snitch (b) explaining some Context about his youth and also the dungeons. (like yeah he could say “i’m scared everyone i care about will die on me in horrifying ways, particularly if they try to get close to me”, but that’s an irrational fear (because why would everyone die horrifyingly, why would getting close to hhj be a death sentence)-- unless you know that “everyone i care about” consists of Hunters and getting close to hhj involves getting involved with dungeons, and then his fear is very real and very understandable, even without knowing about pre-reg. there’s a reason why, even though hhj had four years to grow close to jiyeon, it still took the dungeon shock occurring for him to finally tell her even the smallest bit about pre-regression.

(from jiyeon’s perspective, she doesn’t notice much amiss, because the things hhj is keeping from her are mostly pre-reg related. he doesn’t mind talking to her about his current life, though he is reluctant to talk about some personal issues with her. hamin is a little more distant, because he is still hhj’s boss, so hhj tries to stay mostly cordial with him. orv gang is a more casual relationship- not really the type where he can dump his personal issues on them; and anyway, they’re a tight-knit friend group themselves, so hhj feels a little more on the fringes, not excluded but not fully included, either. a little like hsy does, but without the whole “i have to play the bad guy of the team” mindset.)

and this distance he creates without anyone realizing, this inability of his to fully trust them with all the details of his life, is what results in the freakout around the dungeon shock. the whole, You Are Actively Dying, if you don’t explain yourself right now i’ll finish the job. (though i don’t blame him for not trusting them with his trauma! i don’t really think he’s ready to talk about it. especially with people who don’t yet have any context for even the start of the story. hopefully this’ll change post-dungeon shock, though.)

unfortunately even with his newfound ability to talk about things more freely, he’s still in a sticky situation-- over the years, he’s developed his ability to rely on people for non-life-and-death situations like “earn money on the side”. but sending his brother to take out the trash is very very different from sending his brother to fight dungeons and other Hunters without backup. is very different from needing to risk a life and choosing his brother’s. so despite his hard-won Relying On Others abilities, they don’t extend to dungeon world situations.

and what does this mean, practically? it means, like canon hyj, hhj is going to persistently overreach himself in trying to fight alone-- he’ll try to be competent, to take on adversaries, to build strength in every possible avenue so that he can keep yoohyun and hyj jr and the rest of his family out of danger. he’ll try to be a one-man army, just to defend the people he cares about.

(ONE DAY. one day he will learn that it may not be safe to care, he may still be hurt, but that doesn’t mean he should cut himself off in advance. he’s still allowed to care. he’s still allowed to be cared about. oh, hhj. i want to beat him up but more than that i want to hug him.)

and then there’s hyj jr. oh, junior, you’re a delight. i love the concept of a yoojin who’s never had the trauma of being left behind by yoohyun, who’s gotten to flourish and become everything he has the potential to be, fighting at yoohyun’s side and being amazing. it’s too bad the method i chose to achieve this through also left our prodigal son with extreme issues.

(FAIR WARNING: THIS PART WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS FOR LATER PARTS OF YWBK VIS A VIS SOME CHARACTER DECISIONS AND ACHIEVEMENTS. mostly since hyj’s time to shine hasn’t come through quite yet, so we don’t have as much of him)

so our boy junior may not have the various traumas induced by pre-regression, but he does start off with the same parental neglect that makes him hesitant to rely on seniors. and when his parents die, it’s about a week or so before hhj shows up, which junior spends realizing that he’s really going to have to give up his life and completely dedicate himself to guardianship, huh? and then hhj appears, and rips that role out from under him-- not just the “head of the family” role, even the “primary guardian of yoohyun” role. because yoohyun trusts him instinctively, and looks to him with just as much respect as hyj jr. junior becomes desperate to regain that role he’s lived all his life, in whatever form he can, resulting in the chapter 11 blowup. and past me already covered this:

as for junior, he's suddenly gained a new brother out of nowhere who is demonstrably bad at taking care of himself; on top of that, the "head of house + reliable caretaker" role junior's played almost all his life has been stolen out from under his nose without his realizing, and he's not really been able to adjust to suddenly being made to depend on yoojin (and, to a degree, jiyeon). yeah it helps a bit that yoojin's his elder self but even so. so he's attempting to re-assert himself in the role he's familiar with, particularly now that he's due to [go to mandatory service and] not see any of these people for months

he’s trying to figure out where he fits in this new family setup, trying to figure out what he can do for his family. and he would’ve started out on a track similar to hhj, trying to be everything for his family, except then the dungeons start appearing.

and what does hhj reveal? that hyj jr is destined to be an f-rank. that most of the useful skills hhj has, the hard-won power that he has, it’s all earned from other places that hyj jr won’t be able to replicate, most likely. and hyh-- hyh is going to be the pride of the family, as always. s-rank, top of the nation, worldwide hero, peerless and amazing.

hyj jr starts feeling like he’s falling behind. he starts feeling a lot of pressure to keep up. as the dungeon shock hits, he decides he’s going to keep up, one way or another.

and then there’s the aftermath of the shock, and all hyj jr can do is- is sit in the hospital room and wait for hhj to be okay. there’s monsters on the streets, yoohyun is out there killing them and making a difference, and all hyj jr is doing is sitting around. all he can do is offer yoohyun emotional support when he gets back, all he can do is keep jiyeon sane when she calls for daily checkins, all he can do is wait for the nurses to check that hhj is still alive. all he can do is support the people around him without actually acting out himself.

all that determination he had during the shock doesn’t get killed by the realization that he can’t actually do much, with his strengths; by the realization that he can’t be a one-man army like hyung is, sometimes. he decides, instead, that he’s got his handful of things he can do, so obviously the only path left is to do them perfectly.

he throws himself into learning to fight; he throws himself into playing support whenever possible (though allowances are made for being bratty, sometimes, the remaining anxiety from the aftermath of the shock leading to him acting out); he throws himself into working for haeyeon, to the point of becoming the deputy guild leader. he throws himself into perfection so hard that he takes the slightest failure to meet his sky-high expectations hard. (”Why can’t i fight high-ranks without being afraid like hyung can,” says local E-rank without his hyung’s L-rank Fear Resistance) because he only needs to be good at these few things, he can’t do anything other than these few things, so why can’t he at least do this perfect, y’know? why can’t he keep up with his family? why is he never good enough?

(what if he gets left behind again for not being good the way they want him to be? he’d only wanted to take care of yoohyun, and look where that got them.)

so basically, hyj jr winds up with the same Need To Be Enough that hhj has-- but where hhj needs to be able to do Everything, hyj jr needs to be able to do Perfectly at his (self-assigned) Roles. where hhj wants to do whatever he decides needs doing, hyj jr has no illusions about his abilities; he knows he can only be the supportive brother, the hard-working guild leader, the caring friend, the perfect whatever. everything else is something he won’t dare to try for, because he Knows he’ll never be enough. and if he ever fails even slightly at the things he can do, it’s an instant game over, anyway.

congrats, junior, you’ve given yourself clinical anxiety!

but yeah, that’s. yoojins.

[peachyunjinnie]

❝homecoming❞ hyj ― m.

― summary:

hyunjin was gone for the unveil tour and finally comes to your apartment, a day earlier than you expected. he finds you trying on some of the new lingerie you have gotten from your sister.

idol!hyunjin/girlfriend!reader | smut | 1.4k ↬ content warnings: dom!hyunjin, daddy kink, riding, unprotected sex.

a/n: another request from anon, i hope you enjoy it! <3

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“I don’t know about this, maybe this is too much?” I asked my sister not so sure about this surprise she said would be a good idea,

“Come on, he will love this a lot.” Our look on the mirror in front, reflecting this more than revealing lingerie set she has bought me for a little ‘surprise’ for Hyunjin once he comes home.  

“Thank you a lot for giving me this but I don’t know if this will be good...” I let my head hang down as she was smiling at me and had a reassuring look in her eyes.

“You look absolutely beautiful and I mean, if Hyunjin won’t be all over you then I don’t know what will.” She gave me a small hug. I don’t think I can say anything against that statement.

“Okay, I will get out of here before it gets too late.” She said while she was packing her stuff into her big bag, all of the products she had used on me that made me look like a model. She needed someone to test her makeup and her hair skills on and who could be a better victim than her sister.

“Thank you again, I look a little less depressed now.” I joked with her. She gave me another big hug before she has gotten out of the door and drove off.

In front of the mirror I admired the talent she had. My hair that she gave beachy waves, the makeup that she has painted on my face. It was mind blowing how she could create this on my face. The lingerie she ordered for me, to prevent me from going completely crazy, missing Hyunjin more than ever.

I just stood there with a hand on my face just admiring her work. I touched the white lace on my skin, the bra of the set complementing the curves of my breasts and the string only covering the most important parts that should be teasingly hidden with the cloth.

I jumped as I heard my phone ring on my bed, giving off a loud sound. This one ringtone I had decided to choose for Hyunjin rumbled across the room, giving me chills and shivers. I quickly jumped up and ran to the bed. My heart beating rapidly.

“Hyunjin?!” I said.

“Hi baby, how are you?” He asked with a deeper voice.

“I am good, I miss you.” My pout could be heard through the phone.

“You miss me?” He asked with an audible smirk.

“Yes, you will come tomorrow. Right?” My voice changed tune while I terribly tried to hide my desperation and cravings for Hyunjin. I needed him more than ever, now that I was able to clearly hear his voice gave me a rush of excitement.

“No...I’m sorry. I had some changes in the schedule, Kitten.” The rush of excitement quickly turned into a dull feeling of disappointment. He promised me that tomorrow they would be done.

“Ah...No, it’s okay! It’s fine..” I was trying hard to not sound as sad as I actually was. A sad smile on my lips and liquid in my eyes.

“It’s not fine, I really am so sorry.” He said and sounded as sad as I was or maybe even more depressed. Silence filled the room after he suddenly ended the call, maybe he had some tour stuff to do or maybe Chan said it’s time to go to bed. Insomniacs telling each other to go to sleep, funny.

As I was sitting on the bed, the lingerie was starting to feel like a burden and I was on my way to take everything off but got stopped by a door creaking open and a figure stepping inside. The one and only Hwang Hyunjin stepped in, with his smile beaming me away to cloud nine.

“Woah, you look...” He said and looked up and down my body. My hair, in waves and falling down my back. My makeup that was in a smokey look, helping to give a good contrast on the white lingerie. The exposed and soft skin that was showing the perfectly natural curves. Plus my position that I was sitting in right now, gave him a complete view on my body.

“Hyunjin!!” I jumped up and ran to him to give him the biggest hug on this earth. Throwing my arms around his neck and pushing him down to my height. His very cold hands on my bare and open back, giving my skin a decoration of goosebumps.

“Did someone miss me? Little princess.” His whisper right next to my ear, deep and soft at the same time. I couldn’t believe that I got what I craved for days and weeks.

“I missed you so much!...” I broke the hug to look at him. As we were getting a deep glare from the other , we have gotten closer and closer. Noses touching, eyes closing and lips craving for the softness and the pressure against them.

Finally, this ‘innocent’ kiss started to get intense and deep. His low and deep groans ringing in my ears. He pushed my ass with his hand to jump and hug his waist with my legs. He walked to the bed and sat down with me on his lap. Me sitting on top of him and straddling him with my slightly covered core, pushing against his obvious bulge. His groans telling me to continue my actions and his hard and rough grip on my waist guiding me.

“Needy, are we?” He asked against my lips and smiled into the kiss. I groaned in response to his question, earning a smirk from him. I stood up from his grip and opened his belt. He looked down at my small hands doing their job so effortlessly. A rock-hard Hyunjin bounced up, with his tip directly pointing at my lips. I wanted to put him in my mouth but got stopped by an eager Hyunjin. He grabbed my hand and stopped me from touching his dick at all, leaving me confused. I looked at his shining eyes and the darkness reflected his feelings and his lustful and dirty imagination. 

“Ride me.” He whispered and I smirked at his demand. The dominant voice of his getting my panties to get damp. I climed on top of him and straddled him again, getting on his lap and trying my very hardest to get myself ready for his big and needy size.

He ripped off the brand new panties and pushed me down his dick. My mouth opening wide and letting out a loud and high squeak, being filled up so sweetly. His face lighting up at my painful expression.

“A-Ah-Fuck I- H-Hyun-Hyunjin Yo-You’re so big!-“ I let every single sound out and twitched hardly. My hands on his chest, trying to get away from him a little. Trying to espace this fulfillment. He started to guide me through and helped me to roll my hips. I couldn’t move properly, my head being up with the stars.

He thrusted upwards to my dripping core, drenching his loneliness in this lustful movement. He moaned out loud as he slapped my ass, leaving a big and red handprint on my throbbing cheek. I slapped my hand over my mouth and tried to not be too noisy. My heart beating out of my chest from his tip hitting the best spots possible.

“Don’t cover your mouth, I want to hear you.” Hyunjin groaned in my ear. Softly and deeply. I couldn't stand being so full of him anymore. He grabbed my hip and led me to ride him. My body full of spots and bruises, this world tour had made him extremely needy. He slapped my ass and grabbed my neck with his big hands.

“Who’s your daddy?” He asked with his voice still ringing in my ears. 

“You, H-Hyunjin-” I said with every single thrust he has made underneath me. His hands on my hips and pushing me down, filling me up completely.

[obstinaterixatrix]

hdjsjsjdjjsjdjsjfjf this is so funny to me. bro you’re the expert here!!!!

anyway I was also vaguely thinking about how calculating/restrained hyj is with direct affection for his brother & the folks under his ability and how much he dotes on peace and how it’s probably a similar principle with enjoying scam callers in like… an unambiguous & clearly defined relationship. considering 1) ah the simplicity of a owner-pet relationship, 2) the thing about the… monster ownership token thing?? I think there was something about how as long as hyj has it the monster isn’t able to attack him.

but what’s funny about that to me is like. if that’s the case then maybe the easiest way for someone to get hyj to straightforwardly dote on them is to sign a contract where he has all the power and authority (I mean that’s halfway how it is with dokkaebi except it’s more to do with dokkaebi not having a frame of reference so he can say whatever bullshit he wants and trying to use his ability rather than actually giving affection) (but still it’s a lot more verbal affection than anyone else is getting) (except peace) (and physical I guess since he did hug them to check the dungeon thing??? lmao) anyway I think it’s kind of funny because in this way giving other people a fair contract is almost something that helps hyj keep his distance (aside from him just Having Basic Respect and being considerate of the other person like with yerim). (this excludes the contracts he just rips up so he can do a murder). I don’t know how much of this holds water since it’s all just… what, 6% of the wn?????? lol

I wouldn’t be surprised if it was because of all the. dungeon logistics and guild politics and global trade considerations. bro I just want hyj to have like a legit talk with his brother but hyj won’t stop explaining how to use assets mined from dungeons and also the future political implications of guild dissolutions. to me.

re: the conditional flattery thing and hyj, I feel like… ok, in the beginning he helps the… crafter guy whose name starts with an m by giving encouragement and being like yeah you’re doing your best in this shitty world and I believe you can still find a way to be successful. or something, it’s been a while. but I get the sense that if anyone approached him like that he’d sprint in the other direction because 1) getting his drive & desperation validated/encouraged is kind of what got taken advantage of by the… uh… debt guys, sounds like he’s got a lot of experience getting scammed, 2) I get the sense that some of what shoved him down to rock bottom was the expectation that hyj would be “better” than he was and failing to meet those expectations, so it’d make sense to me if he had a lot of baggage about receiving a certain kind of positive attention. anyway I’m on ch 52

[wovenstarlight]

YWBK update: chapter 26 + liner notes

yesterday will be kinder has updated! you can read chapter 26 here, or start from the beginning here

as always, commentary below the cut

Yoojin🐉😊

watch this space....

In preparation for it, Han Hyunjae temporarily requisitions Yoojin’s laptop and combs through the internet looking for photos of the Hunters that he thinks his family should know about in advance. He goes down one too many internet rabbit-holes, takes way too many screenshots, transcribes a summary of the notes in his future diary, then painstakingly puts everything together into a neat little presentation for them.

picture HHJ reading his fifth article wondering where the sung family heir has disappeared to and being like 👁️👁️👁️👁️

had a little giggle to myself about “future diary” that phrasing was definitely on purpose. will exclusively be referring to it as this now

“Right,” he starts, clapping his hands together, after Yerim’s been sent off to play with Hohyoung.

LHH is so much of a background figure.... i want to see more of himself but he likes his privacy.... he’s got his girlfriend and his baby sister and yoojin who’s wormed his way into his good graces by way of Living In Same House but that’s kinda it....... he’s always lurking in the background instead of showing up on screen. come here hohyoung oppa i just wanna talk

Even if Yoojin’s right, Han Hyunjae still has to protest. [...] But he can’t keep it up when Jiyeon looks at him like that.

KJY has the world’s best Stern Mom Voice and Disappointed Mom Glare and to her great delight they work even on fellow adult HHJ. she will use this power For Evil

The other S-ranks are Moon Hyuna, leader of Breaker Guild, and Bak Mingyu of Hanshin Guild.

OK FOR THIS PART I STRAIGHT FORGOT ABOUT HANSHIN GUILD AND I WAS COUNTING UP ON MY FINGERS LIKE WAIT... IF YERIM WAS THE EIGHTH KOREAN S-RANK WHO WERE THE SEVEN BEFORE HER.... (for those curious they were 1. sung hyunjae, 2. han yoohyun, 3. moon hyuna, 4. song taewon, 5. bak mingyu of hanshin, 6. choi sukwon of MKC, and 7. yoon kyeongsoo of soodam. but. i forgot about the last three altogether.)

“Oh, blond guy,” Yoojin says, unimpressed. “Yeah, I’ve seen him on the news and stuff.”

Top 10 Funny Yoojin Moments (I JUST THINK IT’D BE REALLY FUNNY IF HAN “HAVE I MENTIONED IN THE LAST 5 MINUTES HOW HANDSOME SUNG HYUNJAE IS” YOOJIN DID NOT GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT HIM IN THIS TIMELINE....)

Han Hyunjae takes a moment to double-check that he really doesn’t have Noise Resistance (L), and looks back in time to see Yoojin rubbing at his eyes and glaring at the screen. 

HEHEHE...... A SECRET TOOL THAT WILL HELP US LATER

“Hyunjae-yah,” Jiyeon says, looking at the photo of Sung Hyunjae on screen, “this man looks—” “LIKE A PIECE OF WHITE BREAD,” Yoojin bellows. [...] “HYUNG THINKS HE LOOKS GOOD? [...] Oh, god, he kinda does, [...] but like, in a trashy romance novel cover way.” [... Jiyeon] gives the computer screen an assessing once-over. “He looks like the models in cologne advertisements.”

this part of the chapter was planned waaaay back in august 2020 and i actually crowdfunded these descriptions from the s-class server dshblksjdfkblsdfb. the original suggestions (thanks to server members for these):

“bland whitie potato with a slap-on seme personality”

“tacky valentine’s day/mom’s cologne advertisement”

“the face of the dude on the cover of all my mom’s trashy romance novels”

and tbh HYJ does think he genuinely looks good but like, disgustingly good, you know... also Hyung Likes Him so [19 gun emojis]

also me handwaving moment of mild homophobia because like. jiyeon doesn’t know yet AND homophobia is a thing in this world BUT i don’t really wanna do, All That (we already did it with HYJ once), so.

“Do S-ranks get rich?” Yerim asks as she enters, because apparently everyone’s coming for his life today. Han Hyunjae closes his eyes and lies down on the bed while Yoohyun calls out an affirmation over his head. “Then I think— oh! He looks nice!” He cracks open an eye just in time to see her nod. “I think ahjussi should marry him for the eye candy and the money.” She beams very wide. Han Hyunjae closes his eyes again and tunes out the loud conversation going on around him. And wishes, not for the first time, that he’d picked literally any other name when he first got here.

yerim says gay rights cuz she’s like 12 rn and she straight up does not really care. but says it in, like, the most frustrating way possible.

sometimes you just need to lie down even as the world keeps throwing shit at you. just lie down and nap for a little bit. especially when the shit in question is the alias regret you had literally back in chapter one of your 25+ chapter story. this is gonna come back to bite you in the ass Very Fucking Soon babe!!!!

You Oh this is like the 17th one I got wrong I swear this course is trying to kill me

me, flicking on that EPSON brand projector,

(i have. been having a Time of it.)

[Yoojin🐉😊 called you (21:35)]

that’s minutes and seconds babey... you can pretty much guess the content of call from context :(

well, uh. most of call. some internal plot and Realizations happening right at the end of those 21 minutes, 35 seconds. namely:

Yoojin🐉❤️

:-)

or i dunno you can be my roommate and we can both leech off my rich and prosperous baby brother!

[extremely sad voice] heehoo... they... care each other....

YMW’s parents are kinda shit ngl. they care about him, but unfortunately, that does not show through in their care for him, ykwim? if they just paid attention to what he was actually talented at and encouraged him in his efforts.................

well, he wouldn’t have met HYJ in canon. but he would also have been a lot happier!! and YMW deserves to be happy!!!!!!!! YMW fucking rights!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You When you came with me to drop off Jihui’s standee. 

they finally remembered her name sjfbklsjdfbl

Yoojin🐉❤️ OH right i was talking to one of my new commissioners about their piece realized they were an old friend of hyung’s

HEEHOO.... HONKS MY LITTLE CLOWN NOSE yoojin forgot to ask about pronouns but that’s okay they’re figuring that stuff out still

Yoojin🐉❤️ it’s getting late the kids are going to bed i have to turn off the lights 

you can take the caregiver out the role of caregiving but he will still think of his baby siblings as his kids

Part of that is changing his behaviour. Hyunjae and Yoojin sit side by side and watch as Suk Simyeong gently coaches Yoohyun on how to interact with others and present a neutral, if not friendly, exterior.

[same voice as ingredience] neurodivergence.....

try and look them in the eye, or at least look somewhere on or near their face, if eye contact is too much

yoohyun, who’s the type to look people in the eye without blinking until they inevitably look away because then they don’t try that eye contact shit again later:

tbh i kinda made up shit for the Training In Formality section i don’t know shit about being Formal and Polite. hope i got it right :pensive:

“He’s not good with touch,” Hyunjae cuts in. [...] “Sorry,” [Yoojin] says apologetically to Suk Simyeong, crossing the room and gently pressing a hand against Yoohyun’s back. The kid slowly stops rocking and leans into the touch as he talks.

he’s not good with touch, Usually..... there are exceptions :-) every time i think about this being canon i go insane. wow. love and trust and faith.

Suk Simyeong nods understandingly, giving the closed door a considering look. “If that’s the case, perhaps he can take over part of the preparations,” he offers.

SSM who’s frothing at the mouth wanting to know more about this dude who apparently did some killer business deal with the head of Dungeon Task Force who all the dungeon people are gossiping about on their phone calls while they cart around unassuming A-rank businessmen: PLEEAAASEE fucking involve him PLEEEEASE make him involve himself in business with me

Still, Yoojin’s work is fairly repetitive and boring, so Hyunjae and the women pull out a pack of UNO cards from somewhere and start playing while he works, not paying much attention to either of the boys.

plugging my Han/Bak family playing UNO art here, please reblog like and subscribe,

He stares down at Yoohyun’s hair. Yoohyun’s wavy hair sits there judgmentally. Yoojin bemoans his budding career as a stylist and admits, “This… isn’t working.”

i’m sorry sweetie... hair isn’t your forte :( you can still do fashion if you try really hard

(fun fact about this whole scene, yoohyun not being able to straighten his hair until he could control flame resistance is Certified Canon!)

“No, shit, don’t get up.” Yoojin flaps his free hand at him distractedly. Hyunjae and his need to do everything himself, jeez. “I mean, like. The iron is not. Straightening.”

“hyunjae and his need to do everything” says the man who a few paragraphs ago wanted to be hair makeup clothing and management all in one

“Okay, but why is it not working, though? Is the iron not turned on?” Wow. Wow! Yoojin wonders suddenly if Yoohyun ever felt as homicidal towards him as Yoojin’s currently feeling towards his big brother. If he ever had, then it’s frankly stunning Yoojin’s survived as long as he did. “Do you think I’m stupid,” he snaps. “It’s plugged in.” “Yeah, but did you turn it on.” “You know what, why don’t you touch it and see?” Yoojin unplugs the straightening iron for a minute so that he can take it over to Hyunjae, presenting it to him with a flourish. The heat will hold on for the few seconds this takes. “Come on, touch it right now. I dare you.”

zmur put this into words better than i can, she described this part as “the feeling when elder siblings doubt your intelligence”--

“What if you used a regular iron. Like for clothes,” Hyunjae says, completely ignoring Yoohyun. Yoojin hums thoughtfully.

--and this part as “THEY ARE RIGHT TO DOUBT IT !”

“Killjoy,” Hyunjae mutters so only he and Yoojin can hear.

(should doubt your elder sibling’s intelligence too, once in a while. keep them on their toes.)

“HAN YOOHYUN YOU TAKE YOUR HAND OFF THAT RIGHT NOW,” Yoojin and Hyunjae and Jiyeon holler in perfect unison.

parental instinct for particular phrasings of commands

“Flame Resistance,” Yoohyun reads out. “S-rank.” It’s not heat resistance, but it’s pretty close, so it probably still applies.

hum hum the flame skill works on heat as well, huh

Yoojin’s watching Hyunjae idly when the flickers start up at the edge of his vision again. He blinks, rubbing his eyes idly, and looks back up in time to see, just for a split second— 

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE VISION PROBLEMS WAS IT? RUBBING HIS EYES WAS IT??

“Eh? It didn’t? I’ll… I’ll try it again, one second.” Nothing, for a second— but no, there is, pale flashes here and there. Yoojin shakes his head and blinks. They die down, then start up again. Fainter, this time. Why? 

gonna say this here because i accidentally set it up as a Thing there’s. there’s no reason. whether the message shows up or not is pretty much random error.

“Ahjussi has an L-rank skill?” Yerim demands. “That’s so cool!” Jiyeon and Yoohyun and Yoojin stare at Hyunjae in silence as he returns Yerim’s eager high-five. He cowers when he notices them.

these three are already so mad and they don’t know that between S and L there’s SS and SSS. they’re gonna be SOOOOO mad. anyway yerim remains the chillest in the room

“So, say you needed to cauterize a wound in an emergency, and you didn’t have access to healing items or Hunters. You could drop the Resistance there, set it on fire, and just… sear it shut.” Yoohyun blinks, an intrigued look coming into his eyes, and looks down at his own forearm. “That’s true, I could probably…” “Yeah, food for thought, I suppose.” “What the hell?!” Yerim yelps. “Though it’s up to you if you want to try it. I still think your hair is fine as is, we don’t have to—” “That’s horrifying,” Yoojin blurts. “No, I should know how. In case something happens like you said. How do I do it?” “Now hold on a second,” Jiyeon says, voice rapidly rising in pitch.

sometimes i think about how dungeon stuff made yoojin significantly more chill with violence and murder and self mutilation in some cases. and how he comments specifically (i think this might be in a slightly later chapter, possibly unreleased) that people like myeongwoo who don’t have those extra years of immersion in the dungeon culture still reject and avoid violence and killing whenever possible. really makes you think

anyway! i saved some extra commentary for those okay with spoilers. continue reading at your own risk. extra large warning in case you’re skilling

SPOILER WARNING FOR THE BELOW CONTENT!!!! IT DRAWS ON INFO FROM UNTRANSLATED CHAPTERS, POST-170S AT LEAST!

“How many of these people did you personally know?” “Not many!” “So one, then,” Yoojin concludes. “You don’t know that!”

HE DIDN’T SAY THAT YOOJIN WAS RIGHT, THOUGH..............

“Why did you pick his name out of everyone’s! I thought you weren’t in touch with S-ranks. I thought you picked a friend’s name!”

:)

they wanted some kind of bedroom decoration for a family member, counting sheep or something, i forget 

a sheep, for a family member of one of han hyunjae’s old acquaintances, is it

[peachyunjinnie]

❝love me again❞ hyj ― a.

― summary:

after your 2 year relationship with hyunjin ended he came into your life again as your roommates new boyfriend and your feelings play with you. not just you having feelings again he falls for you and you two relive the reason why you fell for each other.

exboyfriendl!hyunjin/female!reader | angst | 1.7k ↬ content warnings: kinda (?) cheating, mention of suicide and self-harm.

a/n: i am not a good angst writer buuuuut i got the request to do this and i really tried my very best ! enjoy !!

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“I really want you to get yourself together, Y/N.” my roommate told me for the hundredth time now. I rolled my eyes and sighed at her.

“Em’ I am not going to do anything, it’s your boyfriend not the president.” I saw her brushing her dress down and having her big eyes on the mirror. Her dress looked so adorable and her effort for this dude is kinda funny. 

You can say that I am a little bitter after my first ever breakup with the one who shouldn’t be said in this household. Even Emma doesn’t even know anything about the one who shall not be named. 

“I know but I want him to like me and my best friend.” She turned around to face me and to give off her smile. She really wanted to make everything perfect. 

“Come on Emma, you two have been together for a month now and he seems really nice from what you said. He will like you no matter what the people around you do or say.” I gave her a small pat on the shoulder as I lied down and closed my eyes for a small power nap. 

This power nap was very needed after I had to endure her love talk the whole night. I was very happy for her, I really am. But having to hear ‘He is so tall, he is so soft but still hot. He is so handsome and looks like a model.’ got me thinking how I am going to hide those dark circles. 

“Get ready, Y/N! He will meet us in 3 hours and we need 30 minutes to drive and you need to get ready with your dress and your make up and your hair and-” She took a deep breath and continued to search for some of her accessories.

“I am so nervous, Jesus.” I could hear her heartbeat on the drivers seat and I leaned against the window.  

Her reaction really reminded me of my relationship and it was the most intense thing I’ve been through with the feelings and the butterflies. I ran around my whole mall to get the perfects eye look or run around my closet to get the perfect matching clothing for him. I completely changed myself for him and was willing to do more than what I would’ve done for anyone.

“Y/N!” Her voice echoed in my head and I woke up from my memories. 

“Wha-what?” I looked around and saw the restaurant on the left side of us.

“We’re here, but we are a little early. So again, what are we gonna do...?” She asked and gave me a reassuring simper.

“I know. socialize and be nice.” I said like a toddler to it’s mom. Ridiculous, I have to be here and see a guy that I don’t even know anything of. I don’t know his name, age nor do I know how he looks. To be 100% honest with you I want to be here for Em’ but I would much rather be at home and just live my holiday life.

“Good girl! Now come we have to be there before he comes.” She took my hand and gave it a small squeeze. But before I could get out of the car, she hugged me tightly. She let out a a little sob and I directly hugged her tighter.

“I am so happy that you’re here to help me, I appreciate it so much.” Her hands holding me to her with no space between us two.

And exactly there I noticed why she is my best friend, and how I should really try to get her boyfriend to like her even more than he obviously already does. 

“Of course, I will try.” I let go of her and looked at her small tears forming in her eyes. She laughed a little and I wiped them away, her big eyes still having a sad look in them

“I’m so grateful that I met you, and I really want you two to get together better. Because you two are the most important people in my life.” She smiled and my heart broke a little and my eyes started to sweat. 

“Em’, come on. I will do my best and get him to like me, okay?” She gave me a small hug again and has gotten out of the car. I sat there on the passengers seat for a small bit and collected myself, did breathing exercises and stepped out of the car. She waited at the entrance and looked at me for the last time with her ‘get your shit together’ look. 

After her stepping inside this diner-like restaurant Em’ ran to the 2nd row on the left. She directly saw someone and this really tall figure stood up and hugged her, after giving her a small kiss on the cheek. His back was turned to me, as I was still standing on the entrance. 

She grabbed his hand and dragged him to me and as he turned around I couldn’t believe my eyes. This dude that I didn’t know the name of nor the face or pretty much anything, is of fucking course hwang hyunjin. But it looked like I wasn’t the only one who was surprised to see the very familiar face. His eyes grew to the double size and his motions and movements seemed stiff and weird, like someone just spoilered him the end of the best movie ever. 

“So Y/N, I want to introduce you- are you two okay?” Emma’s worried look switched to me and Hyunjin. Her hands touching his biceps but no reaction. His eyes glued and stayed on mine, The longer I looked into his shocked eyes, the more memories bubbled out of my suppressed memory. I couldn’t escape his warm eyes. Moments have passed and I came to me again, I looked around me and spotted the bathroom and with another last look at Hyunjin, I quickly went to the bathroom. 

I fled into the first stall and just sat there a blank face, way too shocked to cry at this point. Of fucking course destiny had to make my life even worse than it already is by getting this boy to enter my life again. My breathing became uneasy, my eyes still blankly starring into nothing all of the memories I have made with him hit me harder than ever before. Every touch, every word...every kiss. It was haunting my head with a bitter aftertaste. 

I heard the croaking door opening, steps coming closer and closer until I saw the black leather shoes and the voice of Hyunjin could be heard. After all this time his voice has not changed a single bit, the same deep and smooth velvet voice. All of the strength I have built up is now slowly crashing down. It is all collapsing, all of the healing process I had behind me were now completely destroyed, demolished, wrecked...forgotten.

“Y/N, I- I.” He didn’t say anything and pressed his forehead against the stall door. He was now living through the whole breakup once again, tears slowly running down his cheeks. His whole body was shaking and his mind was going crazy. He regretted every single day of even having the idea of letting go of you, of leaving you...of hurting you. He was closing his eyes shut and who were now bashed red. 

I sat there for a short while before opening the door and rushing into his arms. I have never felt better in any other place than his long and slender arms. His body was trembling against mine and his teardrops fell down onto my shoulder. He was clutching on me, his sobs filling the bathroom. 

“I am so sorry, I don’t want to leave you.” He was sobbing hardly on my shoulder, I squeezed his lower body. All of these sleepless nights and all of these tears. I couldn’t believe how I could forget all of those moments that have changed me as a person. It’s because I-I still after all those months love him.

“I needed you, what did I do? was it me?” I cried out and with these simple questions he stopped the hug and held my face in his big hands.

“I was naive and dumb. I thought I didn’t need anyone in my life. I was a douche and an idiot to ever let you out of my life. I was never depressed, but after realizing my mistake...I couldn’t live, I-I can’t live without you.” his hands still cupping my face, the look of pure fear in his eyes.

“I wanted you back but after what I did nobody wanted to tell me where you are or give me your contact. My whole life was falling apart without you here. I-I then saw you on the profile pic of this girl and I just had to see you.” He smiled and his eyes were still not getting rid of the tears in them.

“We have to go to her, she is in love with you...” 

“I broke up with her after seeing you, I had to.” He caressed my swollen face and my pinched red cheeks. A thousand thoughts rushed through my head and at the same time I had a blank canvas up there.

I could not believe what I just did but my body reacted in a way where every control I should have is now missing me. My lips reconnected with his and every single cell in my body craved for his lips, for so long. His eyes were closed and every moment you two had lived through now played in his mind, your smile, your personality, your eyes...everything was playing in his mind. He couldn’t believe that his first and last wants him as much as he does.