#huge unhinged rant sorry

[homoquartz]

this post is not gonna be well put together but i am having feelings

mean girls is trending right now because the musical movie just came out and i feel insane. idk why i do, it was stupid of me to think that most people Got It, no one ever gets it, it was always about the memes and the aesthetic.

the first mean girls movie was based on a nonfiction book called queen bees and wannabes. it interviewed and discussed the social hierarchy system in teen girl friendships. how they hold each other to these insane standards of heternormative femininity out of sheer terror that they won't meet those standards themselves. the way they leverage their relationships for some small degree of power in a world designed to strip them of it, even if it drags other girls down.

the "you can only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week and on wednesdays we wear pink" speech was not an original creation for the script. it's a QUOTE from a real teenage girl. those were REAL RULES.

then the musical came, and it was one step removed from the intended messaging of the film. OG mean girls was not perfect (and was extremely racist), but it said what needed said. the musical leaned on the comedy more, but still left a heartfelt undertone, and still critiqued the systems in place. of course no piece of media is going to be perfect, but it was about the conversation.

then this new movie comes out and it is washed over in the veneer of white hollywood feminism so thick you can't see anymore. the problematic aspects of the original movie are taken out to avoid "offending" when the offense was the point. it becomes toothless, it becomes some other thing entirely. they changed karen's line "i expect to run the world in shoes i cannot walk in" to "watch me as i run the world in shoes i cannot walk in." because choice feminism is in vogue, suddenly this character whose entire point is that she doesn't think deeply about WHY she does anything is suddenly hip to the fact that the world is against her.

i think of sokka losing his misogyny arc in the new atla. i think of the Heathers remake casting the bitchy, identical heathers as queer and hollywood-fat outcasts. as if the story, the meaning, the allegory is hidden in the sets and the jokes and the music. it's a whole new thing now, and it's a thing that means nothing in particular.

the plastics should not wear jeans. they should not have curves. their queerness should be suppressed, painful. their sexuality is not a slay, it's the only thing they think they have of value. the santa dance isn't sexy, it's shocking, it's mortifying - they are children.

they're not mean because "we are all mean." they are mean because they are girls in a world that brutalizes them and crushes them into a standardized shape. they are mean because the world is mean to them. they are mean because it gives them some power back. they are mean because it's the only weapon they have.

the landscape of femininity today has shifted to camera-ready makeup at the age of 10, stringent performative hygiene standards, and avoiding being caught on film while having a genuine emotion. the consumerism, the fatphobia, the racism, the classism, the homophobia remain. We could have had a conversation about that.

[phecdasolar]

Tumblr I need your help I am in dire need of feral/unhinged Disaster Twins fics pleaseeee (and maybe Mikey as a bonus) I’m just in love with the idea of Raph being the impulse control for once with this iteration, and just the second he’s out of commission the other three go insane.

Weapons of War, Bioengineered Killing Machines, Manufactured Supersoldiers Rottmnt turtles my BELOVEDS

And maybe just like,,, set Leo and Donnie loose on one of the other dimensions and have them absolutely horrifically annihilate their counterparts’ villains while they watch on in horror

(B.E.A.S.T. was SUCH a good fic you guys oh my GOSH go read it I’m begging you-)

I NEED to have it addressed in fic form that the Rise turtles are fundamentally different than all their other counterparts, because their counterparts? They were accidents. Just a couple of turtles splashed with mutagen and oh look now they’re people but Green. (Huge oversimplification I’m aware but hear me out okay-)

But the Rise boys were created. They were specifically designed to be weapons of mass destruction. They were built with the intent to cause harm which means they were bioengineered to be stronger, smarter(?), faster, to heal quicker, to have the capacity to take hard hits while dishing out even harder ones, they were literally forged with a purpose to kill.

Add on their mystic powers? Then their unlocked Ninpo? You can’t honestly tell me that these four aren’t the strongest and potentially deadliest version of themselves out there.

Yes they still had to learn things, as did the other iterations, they weren’t immediately good (that much is obvious, like c’mon it’s IN the name) but I don’t think the other iterations possess the same instincts as these guys do. They’re just so. Unhinged. They’ve all had their moments in the show I think where it’s obvious they’re not really,,, stable. I love them.

In a plain fists only, maybe weapons, no powers fight, I do think some of the other iterations would win, but purely because they have way more experience than these guys do. (If I did any crossovers I’d say 2003 and 2012 are definitely older than these guys, especially if we’re basing this at the end of their shows) But put them against each other when they’re still at the same level? Rise is whooping butt, I know where I’m placing my bets. It’s called RISE of the TMNT for a reasonnnnnn they’re not there yet but they WILL BE, and as of the end of s2 and the movie I say they’re finally THERE.

I have no idea how this turned into a headcanon rant this was just supposed to be me asking for fic recs hsgdjdjdk it’s almost 3 am tho so whatever sorry if none or only some of this is incoherent o7 o/

Editing this with a list of fics I have been graciously recommended below the cut:

Firefight by remrose [43/43 chapters 222k words] (edit: JUST FINISHED READING ch38-42 WATCH ME BAWL MY EYES OUT I was rotating them in my brain all morning at work) less on the feral side, more on the gut-wrenching angst side, still Disaster Twins and still super good

In Which Donnie and Leo Make Themselves Everyone Else's Problem in an NYC That Isn't Even Their Own by YukiSkyes [7/? chapters, 18k words] the CLASSIC “the Disaster Twins are unapologetically causing chaos” fic, always a delight to read

The Lemon Leak by TurtleSoupSwimmer [27/37 chapters, 143k words] I’m being told it’s very true to the theme here, and it’s very angsty, a suspenseful psychological thriller, and will make you scream at your phone. I for one am very intrigued

Eschatology by aenor_llelo, Alderous, ConcoctionsFromHell, izziel_galaxy, Jaybird314, Otakuforlife19, and Rocket999 [17/17 chapters, 344k words] “HEAVY on the boys being biologically engineered to destroy the world, it also delves into so much character building and worldbuilding that we never got in canon, and it gives even super minor characters the chance to shine” Sounds intriguing, AND it’s a BNHA crossover which I am a big fan of :D

The Hunter’s Bible also by TurtleSoupSwimmer [2/2 chapters, 15k words] Rated Mature, contains themes of SA and c@nnibalism so PLEASE keep that in mind!! Not a fic for the faint of heart this is a Dead Dove: Do Not Eat! The SA is only attempted, and never shown, only implied, and it’s only in ch 1, but the other stuff is fairly descriptive and takes place in ch 2. All that being said, flipping UNHINGED, just about lost my mind in ch 2, it was entertaining in a surreal kinda way if you get what I mean. Funky little feral creatures

[blackstarchanx3new]

Four Swords Returns Pages 451-455

The only thing that goes through my head when Dark asks "Would you like too?!"

is the fucking Lazy town meme:

"Have you ever heard the sound of a rubber ball breaking a window?" "Nuh-uh..." "WOULD YOU LIKE TOO!?"

I imagine dude's delivery would be about as manic.

Really long rant about Green and Dark's dynamic under the cut since I had a lot to say XD

Smth I just find very fun is showing off how everyone deals with Dark differently and what actually WORKS. Since so far we've mostly seen failure on actually communicating with this guy in a meaningful or productive way.

Shadow and Vaati escalated with Dark while Green's response is to deescalate and show compassion. Which is smth he chooses to do rather than it feeling obligated...which is a huge difference from Shadow already. More on that later.

Because the difference between Green and Vaati/Shadow is Green is approaching Dark not as this unstoppable entity or spooky mindless curse or purely as some evil guy hurting his team, but as a person.

An unhinged crazy manic but a person. And PEOPLE can be reasoned with...At least in theory.

The second he realized Dark wasn't what he expected (An immature, excitable person who's obviously lonely and apologizes weirdly enough vs what he thought was going to be an entity more similar to Shadow's scheming and cruelty) he shifted gears to work with this situation.

Vaati gave up on properly communicating with Dark and Shadow tries to exert too much control over the situation and gives into the smaller traps like caring what Dark calls him due to Dark's misunderstanding. "Don't call me Dad" "Don't call me Gannon" Shadow fundamentally gets distracted from the main things on the table instead trying to control Dark to his idea of what being a good guy is. And cause Dark knows a lot of it is selfish in nature he ain't up for it. (He isn't willing to apologize to Vio because he's not sorry and the lie isn't worth making himself look good to Vio or Shadow in Dark Link's idea of morality)

When Dark says concerning shit and shows his excitement in very unnerving ways, Green's response is to ask him to calm down and gently push him off him rather than being more physically violent (Even if I think everyone would understand if he DID do that considering Dark's behavior hah.) and feeding back into the loop by panicking and responding negatively verbally.

Like in a twisted way Dark and Green are working on the same wavelength. So this works into why Dark clearly has respect for Green where for Vaati and Shadow he doesn't.

Green: Is consistent. And Dark Link likes consistency.

Like Green isn't being fake around Dark at the moment. He's not being nice purely for self preservation or PURELY because he thinks it'll solve the problem. Green's motives are lining up with his actions. The dude's just nice. He doesn't want to hurt Dark Link knowing he's a person. And if you remember Shadow's motives being selfish or him lying about them is smth that deeply pissed Dark off.

I don't really have a proper conclusion to these thoughts but I'm excited to get deeper into Dark's relationship with the four Links and Link himself down the line.

It's very fun to think about.

[im-out-of-it]

HAPPY ALEC RANT: MAINLY SHOW ALEC (KINDA BOOK ALEC) BUT HOW HAS MY BOY NOT HAD A MILLION MENTAL BREAKDOWNS?????? CHEERS TO MY MAN ALEC FOR KEEPING HIS SHIT TOGETHER

seriously alec puts up with sooooo much shit. he’s always saving jaces worthless ass, Maryse and Robert are always on him for “family honor”, jace is always yelling at him when clary goes missing as if he can be held responsible for her, and poor soul is just so unhappy

book Alec: not going to mention the writing because it’s so atrocious and ah shit, I already did!!!! seriously, Alec gets treated badly by jace mostly all throughout the series. Alec constantly has to save his life in every book. he’s made to feel that he needs to come out. even Magnus (WHY MAGNUS) is pushing Alec to come out and coming after A TEENAGE ALEC. I feel like Alec is simply not happy basically throughout the whole TMI series. he’s made to be biphobic, acting as though Magnus can’t have a past, tries to make Magnus mortal (ALEC WOULD NEVER), and dude can’t even be his own person without thinking of jace. he’s so badly written and cc has damaged his character so much. I genuinely hope in my world, he’s more like show Alec and living his best and carefree healthy life with Magnus 🥰

show Alec: MY FAVVVVVVVVV!!!!!! his parents are on him for saving the family honor and reputation (because of fucking clary ew), then Maryse gets mad after Alec finally chooses for himself, jace is always using him and expecting Alec to drop everything and save him, clary does the same and doesn’t care about the rules just what she wants. Lydia was such a small character and I know some don’t like her but at least she was nice towards Alec.

honestly in majority of the first season, everyone is yelling or getting shitty with Alec. I’m sorry but this man is so reasonable and lenient. he has let a ton of shit fly!!!! if I was in charge of the institute, I would’ve shipped clarys annoying ass off somewhere else. sorry but not my problem 💀 and the way jace treats Alec is unforgivable. I really wanted Alec to give in and go off completely. I’m glad he stands up for himself cause boy did not have the honor to do it in the books. we know we get the “I’m not your bitch” line but let’s be honest, Alec isn’t his own person.

I’m just amazed he never went completely unhinged. Magnus, Lydia, Izzy (mostly) are probably the only people who are nice to Alec and don’t treat him badly. a little bit of Simon too!!!!! Alec seriously deserved a huge vacation after season one. I’m amazed he stuck by jaces side after all jace did. let that fucker die and stay dead, please!!! IM SERIOUSLY BEGGING AT THIS POINT LMAO

just major props to Alec for not losing his shit and being one of the best characters ever. I can see why Matt is so proud of Alec and whoever changed show Alec and made him better, THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY COLD HEART SERIOUSLY THANK YOU

because what the fuck was it with jace saying “oh Alec will be here.” like Alec has made it clear that he doesn’t want to be involved with all the missions clary is trying to accomplish (bitch there are rules wtf), resulting in his family’s reputation, Izzy being almost deruned. he expects Alec to do whatever he says. and then when ms. I don’t care about the rules so I’ll run away does indeed run away, jace says Alec isn’t doing his best. might I add, is crossing the line. Alec has done so much for you, you ungrateful unworthless ass!!!!!! somebody needed to beat this child I swear

he gets to be happy with Magnus and actually shows what a healthy and fun relationship is. tries to change the relationships between downworlders and shadowhunters. MAKING HISTORY!! is probably the best leader ever in my opinion. he’s just out here thriving

also wish they would’ve kept his sassiness throughout the seasons. imagine his range and sass please. WE NEEDED IT

[obsidianpen]

Okay I’ve been thinking: so I love to read both tomarry and tomione ff but reading tomarry i really need to be in the right mindspace because it‘s usually such a massive power imbalance and it‘s difficult to read about someone essentially being at the mercy of another person 24/7.

And so I was thinking why it is that when I‘m feeling bad, tomione is my comfort pairing and I think it‘s because it‘s the only popular tom riddle pairing where tom‘s counterpart is equal to him in a way that is believable.

I also think this is why tom falling in love with hermione / becoming obsessed with her makes so much sense! Hermione actually has the wit and skill to outsmart him at times and this might just be me, but from the books I also always got the impression she was a little wilder and more unhinged than harry and that‘s gotta be sooooo hot to tom. She is obviously sexy killer lady he an duel witj but I think what makes her most appealing to him is the fact that she is something new

I can’t speak for tomarry as a whole, I can only really speak about my fics here - but as far as my writing with those two pairings go, the unequal power imbalance has a lot more to do with the overall plot than it does hermione vs Harry. In NG, of course there is a huge power imbalance. It’s a Voldemort wins AU (it’s also definitely harrymort, not tomarry, but that’s another whole thing). If/when I get back to fics like Lightning or Incendiary, that will chance, and they’ll be on much more level footing.

I bet there are many fics out there that feature a Harry and Tom who are of a similar age, who are similarly competent and give each a run for the others money in a way that many Tom and hermione stories do. There’s just probably not as many fics where Voldemort is as obsessed and unhinged in his wanting to utterly posses hermione in a way that would lend itself to a massive power imbalance in the first place because… she’s hermione. She’s canonically got nothing going on that would make Voldemort care about her - she’s a muggleborn and she’s NOT his horcrux and she’s not his prophesized enemy etc etc, so authors really have to set up a whole situation to make the pairing believable. Which I assume usually tends to be stories where hermione intentionally does something extraordinary to catch his eye, often the eye of a young and hot Tom riddle, meaning, you know. Less power imbalance. Sorry this isn’t the rant your wanted but it’s the one you got 😅

[halucynator]

END OF 2023

sorry to anyone who didn't want to be tagged xx

hi! most of you will know me as lucy (unless you're @m3ntallyunstable34 and know my real name lol)

so yes, i am lucy. and this is me reflecting on 2023 on tumblr because it seems like a logical thing to do considering this year sucked like 20% less (one of us is lying reference) because of all my amazing online friends. so yes i guess in a way this is a mutual appreciation post 🫶

@berryzxx you wouldn't believe me when i tell you you were the first mutual i didn't have to be all professional and got to be a crazy bitch with lmao so thank you for not judging me and talking to me like we're besties (we totally are btw bc i said so) mwahh

@longlivestv the loml literally owe my life to you bee 🫶🫶 you are one of the main reasons i'm friends with all of the people i will mention after, so tysm and thank you for being so sweet to me and i love flirting with you /hj ilysm 💗 also if im too young to fall in love why do you keep running through my brain? 😍😍

@loserdiaz one of the very few people i get to openly talk to and not feel weird doing it akshdasjhd ilysm april <33 and youre one of the only people i will ever admit has better pick up lines than me (thats a huge honour btw) so thank you for keeping up with me and flirting with me it makes me feel very special mwahhh and ily and we should totally snuggle by the fireplace you know i made those cookies you like (sab reference) 😍🫶

@weeping-in-the-willows thank you for being the absolute SWEETEST person to me <3 ilysm and btw you were my first discord friend and i'm so honoured about that ajshdnjfe you're so nice and ily and i hope you get everything you want

@theladyinwhite13 thank you for appreciating my unhinged comments and you're one of the few people who deserve to be told that they are funnier than me (i rarely ever give anyone this honour btw so its very special) and i think you might appreciate this reference 'so what if i just wanna be a little out of my mind'

@bodybetters and @its-tortle karo and tortle my beloved <3 ilysm you're like two of the BEST mutuals ever and i was so honoured happy excited (any other positive adjective) when i realised you followed ME back?!? i was literally so ajshdnjfe i can't even put it in words you're like my favourite people on this hellsite (affectionate)

@suugarbabe ajdhhgajsgf my pookie <33 you always stand up for me and ilysm for it youre the nicest to me what did i ever do to deserve you 😭❤️

@patrophthia omg the absolute sweetestt!! youre an angel and ilysm and i hope you have the best life every <33 ilysm thank you for being so nice to me and making me feel valued asjdhajksd i love youu

@theautistmwitch omg idk how youre still sane after hearing to my traumatising jokes 😭 ilysm mwahh❤️thank you for being so sweet to meee it makes me so happy <333 can't wait to traumatise- uh i mean make you laugh even more next year!

@kurtcobainsgreencardigan ajkshdad i had the time of my life 'bullying' [insert their name] (i dont wanna get cancelled yk just in case people actually like them) with you <33 [i mean you technically didn't 'bully' them but we bonded over that] you're so funny and sweet and ily<3

@catastrxblues nadine the loml <33 i LOVED chatting with you and ranting to you and reading your answers to my asks akgdskg im so glad to have you as a mutual and i would love to have some more ranting convos with you in the future haha asdhjhajsh ilysm mwahh <3

@nyctophile-me omg you're so sweet to meee 😭😭😭 ily you're like one of my favourite wives too you're one of the only people i will ever share sab with mwah ❤️❤️ id love to talk to you more next year <3

@magicandmaybe @andi-is-bored @alltheliars and @animallover4000 omg you're all so sweet and ily and we didn't really interact a lot this year but i loved chatting with you on discord 💕

@imperpetuallylost omg ilyy you're so unintentionally (or intentionally?) funny ahsjdnfne and i guess it's inevitable sorry sky but it looks like you (lea not sky) deserve to [redacted] goosebot and it's well deserved ajsjdjdne ily and id love to interact more with you next year <33

@london-affairs literally started talking to you like 5 days ago and we were flirting non stop that's CRAZYYYY ily btw pookie 😍

@m3ntallyunstable34 my literal best friend!! i absolutely love you mwah mwah mwah thank you for being my best friend and dealing with me for 12 years llama im shocked you're not insane yet ahsjsj ilyyyy ❤️

these are the mutuals that made me throw my phone across the room and scream in excitement when i realised THEY followed ME

also i will take this moment to thank all of you for making my year amazing and i love you all so much and i hope you have THE BEST 2024. thank you so much for being a part of my crazy blog i would never have imagined 438 people would find this silly little blog 🫶

@cassiopeiasdaughter @faultsline @underthenightskydreamsneverdie @theostrophywife @slytherinslut0 @imperpetuallylost @themidnightarcher @stvrlighhttt @psychedeliccc @prettybaby-grande @nqds @themidnightarcher @i-miss-you-im-sorry @cottoncandywhispers @svnflowermoon @finalgirllx @fallingforfictionalcharacterss @ashisgreedy @moonffe @suugarbabe @wordsarelife and @xobridgertonblues (i might've tagged some people twice sorryyyy)

[krrm4]

unrequited

bonten!haitani ran x fem!reader

a/n: IM BACK BABYYYY (i may disappear again but i’ll try not to)

cw: stalking, obsessive behaviour, guns, murder, unhinged & delusional ran (somewhat mild but not rly)

word count: 961

synopsis: ran can’t handle rejection.

return to masterlist.

ran can’t remember the last time he felt this way. scratch that, he can’t remember if he’s ever even felt this way for another person before.

there’s something about you. something so, pure. so innocent. he’s just so tempted to keep you in his arms, to hold and protect you. he can’t have anyone else taint and ruin you, oh no. that’s for him and him only.

he could genuinely see himself settling down with you. frequent daydreams of you walking down the aisle, frolicking in your wedding dress. he’s even got the entire reception down, thinking about the exchange of vows and wedding bands. his heart always skips a beat whenever he thinks of you carrying his surname, you carrying his children. he’s even stopped visiting brothels, stopped messing around with other women for your sake, that’s gotta count for something, right?

it wasn’t supposed to be like this.

it was supposed to be perfect.

you were supposed to like him back.

why didn’t you like him back? what’s not to like?

ran paced around in his cold and empty home. he’s bagged countless of women in his lifetime, why not you?

he’s never raised his voice at you, always complimented you, always visited your workplace, listened to you rant about your shitty boss and colleagues, drove you back to your home when you got too drunk at pubs, even ran you bubble baths and gave you massages.

and you were just so perfect. always so submissive and soft-spoken, and it only added to his list of things to like about you when you didn’t question the tattoo on his neck.

you’d be the perfect trophy wife, and ran’s got a wallet full of cash and a cold bed, you’re practically a match made in heaven. so why didn’t you accept him?

a few hours ago.

it was routine for him to enter your office an hour before you left at this point, always looking for an excuse to get a drink with you, maybe even accompany you back home to make sure you’re safe when actually, he just wanted to spend more time with you. walking in with a large bouquet of roses and a huge shit-eating grin, his expression faltered when he caught a glimpse of how tense you had suddenly gotten.

“hey, what’s wrong?” ran set the bouquet of roses down on your desk. his slender hands grabbed your cheeks, tilting your face up to look at him, a soft smile gracing his features.

“…what’s the meaning of this?” you asked, pointing at the bouquet of roses.

ran’s eyes followed your hand, his gaze landing on the bouquet. “oh, this? it’s for you.”

“i really like you, y/n.”

ran’s smile dropped once again, watching as you gently removed his hands from your face. and what you said following your actions, broke his heart in two.

“i can’t, i’m sorry. i don’t feel the same.”

back to the present.

ran looks into his bathroom mirror for what seems to be the umpteenth time already. nope, nothing wrong with his face. if all boxes are checked, then why aren’t you his? he’s even brought up the topic of relationships with you before, and whatever you’ve described fits him perfectly. so, what’s the problem?

ran soon found the root of it all, however.

weeks of stalking your social media account, but nothing turned up. another week of tailing you around in person, nothing. ran was getting desperate.

it took tons of bribing to get kokonoi to hack into all of your social media accounts, but ran didn’t regret it one bit. nothing was going to stop him. after all, he should have access to his lover’s private life, right?

scrolling through your archived instagram stories, he found something that was posted on your close friends list. ran scoffed. what were you thinking, not adding him into it? after all he’s done for you? but, he’ll forgive you, since he’s so gracious.

he pushed his frustration to the back of his mind, taking a closer look at the story. his eyes widened. you. a guy. at a restaurant. holding hands. smiling.

oh, you naïve little one. you chose that guy? over ran? no. he won’t have it. he’d rather you admit to dating sanzu.

“koko, mind helping me track y/n’s location? now.” ran smiled, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes.

kokonoi knew better than to refuse ran right now, so he got to work.

“i found her, sending you her location now.” kokonoi piped up after a few minutes.

ran’s phone dinged, and he nodded in acknowledgment, muttering a small “thanks” as he unlocked his phone. oh, how cute, it was the same restaurant you took that instagram story at.

the man you’re with right now? he could never compare to ran. he’ll never love you like ran would. heck, ran could make that man’s yearly salary from a single hit. in ran’s eyes, that man? that man shouldn’t even have the privilege of looking at you, let alone touch you.

ran paced around kokonoi’s office for a hot minute, his thoughts running wild. you could do better than that man, and ran was sure you knew it too. were you being blackmailed? held hostage? oh no. no one touches his girl. no one will hurt her. not even her feelings.

thinking of what to do, ran’s eyes suddenly landed on the gun laying on kokonoi’s desk.

snatching the gun from the desk, the only thing ran said was “i’ll give it back after i’m done.”

now, he was speeding down the streets of japan, fully intending to be your knight in shining armour, determined to save you from that pathetic excuse of a man,

a glock tucked underneath the front of his trousers.

© krrm4 do not post, claim, plagiarise, modify or translate any of my work on any platforms.

[poisoned-pearls]

Enzi Bucchi Lore drops (aka random facts)

She grew up with a LOT of Faraja’s hand-me-downs. Ruggie may be in a better financial position now but he is NOT passing up free shit.

the hand-me-downs only stopped once Enzi got to 5’1 and stayed there, while Faraja went on to be around 6ft. She still will ruffle through any old stuff Faraja wants to get rid of tho.

she is actually very highly ranked in her own town! Bc hyenas pass title/social ranking down to their youngest, she got the title of metaphorical Queen from grandma Bucchi (who will never die to me I’m sorry her and Epel’s grandma get immortality). She plays a LOT into hyena body language, and tries to establish herself as a worthy leader as soon as possible. Does this mean she can be a bit aggressive and unhinged at times? Yes- but it’s most often just to make sure no one tries to take her title. Show no normal signs of aggression and she backs off pretty quickly

speaking of which, oh my god she was kinda a little shit in the time period RIGHT before she got her title but when she knew she was gonna get it. I just can’t wait to be king energy. Terror to the town. Ruggie would yank her up by the back of her shirt a lot during this era

her prosthetics are entirely paid for by the royal family. Leona got ruggie a meeting time so he could go rant their ears off abt how THEY should pay for her legs bc it’s THEIR orphanage THEY endorsed and run (one of many but still) that neglected her so much that she got an infected bite by a wild dog. He got what he wanted though! (And someone in the financial department definitely groaned when enzi got into athletics, bc now they have to pay for a running leg too)

SPEAKING OF SPORTS! She plays soccer!!! That’s not even apart of her school it was just a HUGE thing with all of the neighborhood kids and a large part of their town and she’d play constantly. Still does!

also she can kick like hell. Her non amputated leg is jacked as shit to compensate when she just, exists without her leg on. When she gets a good kick in she can LAUNCH a ball. Football teams would love her (<- has never played football)

she goes to school in the city! Takes a subway in the morning. The savanna has had a lot more development in rural areas so she uses it to go to the closest magic school

she found out she could use magic one day when she was 12 bc she was too lazy to get up and put on her leg. She just groaned, did a little hand grab (it’s halfway across her room) and the thing SHOT out at her and right into her grasp. She screamed dad so loudly ruggie full on thought she’d woken up without her ears.

anyways the reason she’s not at nrc is actually bc she found out abt her magic so late. Ruggie couldn’t transfer her into any magic school until she was 15, and couldn’t send her to nrc with literally like, basically no training. He did what he could before she was 15 but still, needed legit classes.

speaking of- she’s actually very quick at learning magical things. Does it mean she’s always super good? No, but she rarely ever actually fucks up smth. If she needs a fireball she’s gonna have a fireball! It may be only the size of a ping pong ball but hey! The kid over there had 17 different things fly out of their wand, so that’s a win for her!

she does eventually transfer to nrc tho! Is it for her gf?…….. no comment

no but actually it’s only like 60% for her gf she also got a frantic call from Faraja being like “Enz I don’t trust any of these idiots.” (Faraja did not have a Dan(tm) in her dorm)

Anywaysss thank you @snowwhite0430 for the idea/prompttt

[firecooking]

(bruhstation) hey neil! thank you very much for supporting fortezza bigg city so far :] I really appreciate the thought you've put into analyzing bits of my silly little AU, and I've also gained a huge appreciation for your own works as well. it's so clear you've put a lot of thought and research into your AU and it really blew my mind because everything is so meticulously thought out!!! and I'm looking forward to more!!! here's a quick sketch of your gal zaffre! once again thanks :3 (also you're inspiring me to make my own z-stacks oc! haha)

OHHH MY GOD LOOK AT HER MY BABY GIRL MY SWEET CHEESE SHE LOOKS AMAZING AHHH YOUR ART IS SO GOOD I LOVE YOUR FORM AND VOLUME AND HOW YOU DO YOUR LINE WEIGHT WITH THE OPACITY AND LINE DYNAMICS your handle on anatomy and rendering is really interesting to me, reading you work in Fire Alpaca with a mouse is mind boggling to me, i remember when I was doing the same years and years ago and the skill you show is really fascinating and i am jealous, the way your art is put together is scratching my brain. i have been doing art studies of it and trying to dissect it, it'd have such a interesting feel for animation, you have a wonderful style for breaking down into a limited animation style with a emphasis on dynamics with animation in a 8s, 6s, and 4s with 2s detailing and a hard tweening style [<- just professional animator things lol] The way you render shadow and lighting is also ough. This Zaffre is genuinely so wonderful, new desk top background moments. I love her gesture and expression here, it really captures her as a character! Also the way you draw hands, augh, just augh I wish.

You, my friend, are a fabulous illustrator!

And oh my god your AU is scratching my brain in ways I didn't think possible! I know so little yet there is so much there. When I genuinely say that it is affecting me as much as if not more that @askthefamous8 that is the highest compliment I can muster [that AU has been one of my special interests since 2015,]. I am legit making a post it note wall over FBC just like ATF8 had when I was in middle/high school

You have the most loyal human AU fan on your team now, I genuinely smile thinking about Fortezza Bigg City all day long, my friends and partner are getting annoyed to death from me ranting. sorry dear if you are reading this: I know you hate tugs

Also thank you! I really love doing in depth research, its the autism at work. I am a proud vehicle autistic. I've said it before but working on a ship for a summer just to know the mechanics of how actual sailing works is probably the most unhinged thing I can say I've done for accuracy sake. Loved my Captain and fellow crew, very sad I got sick and had to leave. Honestly would love to be a sailor if my heath wasn't bungled up and I wasn't like $200k of debt in animation college.

My humanoid vehicle AU's are partially based on my sadly never going to be picked up pitch bible for a science fiction based historical vehicle show [my fatal flaw is niche interests] And it literally makes my day to sit down and work on the most expansive and historically researched BS on earth, my AU is both a lovely love letter to TUGS as the show it is and a Love Letter to what TUGS wanted to be! At the end of the day TUGS wanted to be it's days Steven Universe or MASH [something I am gonna elaborate in another format later] but unfortunately it just didn't have the right ingredients. Its the Same as the TUGS musical I'm working on, it's a love letter to what TUGS both is and was supposed to be along with being a love letter to the characters themselves

Also:

Join the Z-Stacks OC League, we have cool hats and crime

[whinlatter]

i MUST hear your thoughts on "im your man" by mitski and how it's the ginny/harry/sirius trio anthem in "beasts"...must hear

what have you done asking me about this...... a great and terrible mistake........ the air is thick with sirens...........

basically i'm your man is an absolutely perfect song about feeling unworthy and undeserving of the love someone gives you, and a feeling of great dread that one day the other person will realise it and leave. it is - for this reason - so eye-wateringly ginny-sirius-harry coded i simply cannot bear it. that whole album (the land is inhospitable and so are we) is heaven and there are so many songs on it that have been absolutely dynamite for getting the juices flowing with this fic (the frost and star are my hinny anthems for chapter 12  👀)

so i am taking a short dissertation writing break to offer an entirely unhinged rant about i'm your man complete with some mild beasts spoilers because apparently i care a lot about this inexplicably. thank you so much for humouring me!

you're an angel, i'm a dog or you're a dog and i'm your man you believe me like a god i'll destroy you like i am

the first verse plays with the idea that there are three tiers of being - dog, man, angel/god - that all exist in relation to each other. the narrator sings the song to put themselves down. you're an angel, i'm a dog - meaning, i'm lowly nothing compared to your pure divine greatness. in the next line, a twist and advance on that idea: you're a dog (faithful, honest, loyal, loving easily and with such trust) and i'm your man (the one who is responsible for you, who you look to protect and sustain you, who is unworthy of that kind of adoration). you believe me like a god - you trust and believe in my power and ability to take care of you and guide you. but then: i'll destroy you like i am - the only real godlike power the narrator identifies with is the capacity for destruction and ruin.

ok partly it's... you know....... the dog thing because i am very on-the-nose. (obviously sirius as padfoot, but also the distinctions in the wizarding world between beings as the moral civilised entities vs the beasts, the wild and lawless and violent magical creatures). but it's also this suggestion of hero worship and adoration from one character to another, and the object of that kind of love struggling to feel worthy of it and fearing the power it has given them over the other person. it's such a huge vibe for how i'm thinking about these characters !! i feel like it works both for harry and sirius' relationship as well as harry and ginny's: the love and reverence harry has for sirius, when sirius is filled with so much self-loathing and guilt and awareness of his own failings as a parent figure, and the way harry comes to love ginny and think of her as this pure singular light and symbol of all his hopes for a bright and good future, which (i think!) would be a lot for ginny to take on and live up to and feel deserving of. there's even shades of it in how i imagine ginny feels about sirius in the flashbacks - little ginny looking up to sirius like he's a god, hanging off his every word, sirius backing away from being responsible for this child's admiration and desire for guidance from him.

i'm sorry i'm the one you love no one will ever love me like you again so when you leave me, i should die i deserve it, don't i

i mean this is a pure sirius verse imo also with such harry shades to it ('i deserve it don't i' pure ootp harry angst). but i see some of ginny in this too ('i'm sorry i'm the one you love' - her wish that she could just be such cool and chill and easy and trying to live up to this idea harry sometimes as of her as so strong and stoic and able to deal with things, and then her feelings when all that comes crumbling down....)

i can feel it getting near like flashlights coming down the way one day you'll figure me out i'll meet judgment by the hounds

the feeling of being hunted! sirius and harry as wanted men! ginny getting found out and caught in her secrets and half-lies! 'i'll meet judgement by the hounds' god. god

people always gave me love others were never to blame after all you believe me like a god i'll betray you like a man

i think of this verse as the sirius and ginny verse. here the narrator locates the source of their unworthiness internally, not in being deprived of love by others, but in something fundamentally broken and tainted inside them. sirius as a character can't blame a total absence of love for what he's become - he was loved, he blames no-one but himself for the loathing he feels for himself. ginny, too, could not have been more loved, both before the TMR ordeal, but also thereafter - she comes from a family that adores her, she is widely liked and admired; but still, there's something missing in her sense of self. i do not wish to spoil future chapters but yeah this is bit is a Big Mood as we come closer to understanding ginny's war and what it asked of her

in chapters 10 and 11 of beasts, i started to play with this idea of the traitor, of a person who has made a great and terrible choice to betray the people close to them and in doing so revealed a true self that was there all along but lay dormant. so far in the fic, i've tried to thread in a lil drip-drip-drip of questions about the self, who a person really ever is, and about the choices characters make because of their sense of who they are, especially moral choices, in a war and under a regime that must, ethically, be resisted.

of sirius, harry, and ginny, so far it's sirius who knows most about what it is to be a traitor: someone who spent the bulk of his life assumed to be a turncoat, who is consumed by his hatred of wormtail and the memory of his treachery, who can't even begin to grasp the layers and dimensions to his own brother's betrayal, and who fundamentally still thinks of himself as a traitor to his best mate, believing himself to having 'as good as' killed lily and james. harry is the one who's full of trust, throughout the war:

'“No,” Harry said out loud, and they all looked at him, surprised. The firewhisky seemed to have amplified his voice. “I mean . . . if somebody made a mistake,” Harry went on, “and let something slip, I know they didn’t mean to do it. It’s not their fault,” he repeated, again a little louder than he would usually have spoken. “We’ve got to trust each other. I trust all of you, I don’t think anyone in this room would ever sell me to Voldemort."'

“No, I think you’re like James,” said Lupin, “who would have regarded it as the height of dishonour to mistrust his friends.” Harry knew what Lupin was getting at: that his father had been betrayed by his friend, Peter Pettigrew. He felt irrationally angry. He wanted to argue, but Lupin had turned away from him...'

ginny, of course, knows what it is to be betrayed - by her first real friend, by her own brother. but i just think these two final lines, the twist on the first verse, are such a huge huge mood for drawing some of these ideas to the surface as the plot inches (v slowly lol) forwards - the idea of a character who has had every faith put in them by someone who loves and believes in them, who fears that they wll buckle under the weight of it and betray that love and trust in terrible ways. to betray you like a man - for the great moral sin to be something inherent to no other creature or being but man - is just such a powerful cool as shit line that is really gettin me going for writing the next bit of this fic.

wow i didn't even know how much i cared about this song but turns out it's a lot???? troubling for me!

[shigarakisslutbag]

This isnt directly a request but if you do end up getting inspiration out of this then im glad! (wouldn't complain lol) Imagine how Shiggy would act if some villain with a big loving heart came in and just- somewhat adopted him. Shiggy gets injured? They're there soothing and scolding him. Ranting about video games or heroes? They're patiently listening. Makes my heart so happy negl.

Omg anon I actually really like this idea lol. I have no idea how I would write it as a fic or even organized headcanons BUT I will most certainly give you my disorganized thoughts on this because I have no self control.

APOLOGIES because I'm writing this at 1:33pm and I am very tired (but will likely not sleep until 3am.), THEREFORE, I probably have many typos because I didn't proof read an I am so sorry lol. Anyways, hope you enjoy my thoughts on this, feel free to add anything, I don't mind going back and forth on this topic (this goes for anyone btw! Not just anon. I love hearing everyone's thoughts on concepts I write for)

I feel like in this scenario of reader being a villain, reader's motives are either out of spite towards their hatred for capitalism or they're just kind of... goofy...and unhinged... in a bad way .. thatcopsandheroesdontlike YOU GET THE PICTURE OK? (Use your imagination bestie)

But regaRDLESS, you have a huge soft spot (and maybe some hard spots;) ) for shigaraki.

Which actually just ends up with you having a lot of compassion and care towards him. You can tell he's been through a lot. anyone can. and seeing him having clear struggles in his physical life and internal conflicts, you can't help but want to, well, help him.

I won't go into a huge back story because I simply... am tired LOL. But somewhere along the way shigaraki let you grace him with your presence.

So now you're here with your adopted introverted son and guiding him through his life full of terrorism, tyrants, and genocide 🫶 (you don't quite understand how he's both introverted and a menace to society at the same time. Shigaraki is what happens when an introvert just gets really fed up with capitalism ig)

BUT I DIGRESS

Shigaraki actually really appreciates you're presence. Will he admit it? FUCK NO LMAO. he'd rather twist his eyelids off and eat them before telling your annoying ass he appreciates you. But he does. Just trust me, he does.

Besides spinner, no one really listens to his rants about video games, players, the fall of society. Dabi refers to him as "a cartoon villain on heroin who monologues " shigaraki didn't like that very much

But you listen. You really listen. You ask him questions, you validate his feelings and concerns, you make sure he knows that he's making progress, ect. You don't just hear what he says, you listen. You engage. Which is something he's needed for a very long time.

Especially when he gets injured, is when he gets the most attention from you. Honestly sometimes he wants to hurt himself just hear you cry over him LOL. He's low-key obsessed with you but don't ever bring it up if you notice.

Like the one time he came back to the bar after the U.S.J incident, all bloody with bullets wounds, you were... not handling it well to say the least. Lol. Shigaraki was fine, just chilling on the floor cursing the hero bastards, as he calls them. But you were "dramatic" as shigaraki says. "I'll be fine I'll just stick some bread in bullet holes and cover them with plastic wrap"

???

????!!!!

SHIGARAKI YOU SUPID FUCK

You, much to his dismay, disinfected the wound with alcohol and with kurogiris help stitched up the wounds and wrapped them with a compression bandage and made him rest while checking in every so often to change out his gauze and bandages and cleaning the wounds again.

You also checked in quite a bit to make sure he was hydrated (with water because all the idiot drinks are energy drinks and alcohol)

Going back to listening to his interests, you both share some of the same interests so it helps a lot with your bond with the leader of the league. Even political views.

He listens to you too, even if he doesn't understand some of your interests or is very knowledgeable on certain topics you enjoy, he loves listening to you. He actually thinks your way of speaking and the way your voice sounds is very, very cute. But again, he'll never tell you. He's too embarrassed to and doesn't want to ruin,,,, whatever reputation he thinks he has.

[betty-talks]

Time for my big long theory about the eras tour London (most of this is snippets of things from various twitter users). Sorry I’m about to get so professional and this is super long but I’m so serious about this.

So it all starts with this picture. As usual, Taylor uses little symbols to represent the 5 openers that are opening alongside paramore. BUT, I think the symbols are also hints for the little unhinged things she’s gonna do each night.

Starting with London N4, she represented Sofia Isella with a heart. She also brought out Ed Sheeran and they sang a song together. I think the heart could represent him, since they’re best friends.

Then onto N5, she represented Holly Humberstone with a star. She also wore a new midnights bodysuit, one made out of stars.

Then today, N6, Suki Waterhouse is represented by a typewriter. So, whatever she does tonight has to have something to do with TTPD. To fuel the fire, Post Malone has been spotted in London, and Florence Welch has been spotted at the eras tour again. I think we’re getting an appearance of either one or both of them.

Now for the next two nights. N7 is Maisie Peters, represented by a hat. I have two theories for this. One, maybe another Travis appearance on stage. Two, an ICDIWABH music video announcement, which is more likely.

Then, N8, the big final night of the European leg. People have a lot of different theories, especially about reputation Taylor’s Version, but I don’t quite think that’ll happen. To continue with my theory, the opener Raye is represented by a camera. I believe she’s announcing a behind the scenes documentary, especially because each night there has been video of a camera crew following Taylor backstage, and remaining back there for the entirety of the show (tonight’s footage shown below).

There has also been hints to that night being important, including the bag Taylor was seen holding earlier this week that’s called the “Brown Tuesday Bag,” and Tuesdays show is colored in brown from when Taylor Nation announced it.

Some people also think reputation could be announced tonight (she wore blue today and debuted a new midnights bodysuit last night, which she also did before announcing 1989 TV), which I’m down to clown any night, but personally I think a VMAs announcement makes a little more sense.

Ok that’s all sorry for the HUGE rant.

[psalmsofpsychosis]

(still the same anon from all those Batman/Joker asks)

Be ready with those empty walls, pal, I'm on my way!! I've already thrown my suitcase in the car and filled up the gas-

You blew every expectation I had with that answer of yours and I don't know if I'll ever recover. I will absolutely respond to your answer but first I need to put my brain back together from being rearranged like a jigzaw puzzle. I'm definitely looking forward to reading that Jesus/side wound meta whenever you post it.

Until then I have a different question. I don't remember who said it but it was along these lines: "There are only three people in the world who find the Joker funny. Joker himself, sometimes Harley and lastly Bruce. And he feels so fucking guilty for it."

They pointed out how Batman does a lot of bad puns, same as the Joker, except he does it with a straight face and serious tone. For example: Bat-terry, Bat-bucket, Bat-arang, saying "hang in there Alfred" while Alfred is dangling off a metal beam. (Those are my rushed examples, not something the original poster brought up, so if they're unaccurate, that's my fault). Bruce will also just say the craziest shit and nobody is sure if he's serious or not. (Happens all the time)

I have a vague suspicion who it was but I'm not sure enough to @ them.

Joker and Batman's sense of humour and how they are somewhat opposed but still similar will drive me into an early grave I swear. Like that post that's still circulating somwhere that mentions how Bruce "lives and dies by the fact that nobody can ever tell when he's pulling their chain" and how Joker "craves to have his comedic genius acknowledged [but he's just not funny]".

I don't know about Joker wanting to be acknowledged as funny because I don't think he considers himself to be in the clown business. He definitely ranted about this to a captured Damian in a comic once. But he does make a lot of bad jokes. Maybe he doesn't think himself funny, either?

Any thoughts?

(Btw I'm not done pestering you yet, be ready to receive an ask about the Batman: I Am Suicide comic and about Martha and Thomas Wayne in the next few days. I still have to gather my thoughts though.)

(Can I just say that every single one of your answers has made my brain release a huge amount of serotonin? Or is that too much? Eh, whatever, it's the truth anyway. You've brightened my week considerably, thank you so much!!)

❤️❤️ hi friend, i adore receiving your asks and getting to exchange interpretations with you, and i can only hope that my superturbonexus unhinged answers have brought half as much joy to you as your questions have brought me 🥰

I kinda took my time with this ask (sorry!) because it's a rather big bite out of an intricate can of bat worms for me, can included. I also found and reread this particular post by @distort-opia , which put more a dozen more interesting worms in my metaphorical can— i'm not sure though if it was the post you were initially referring to.

So! The concept of jokes and generally being a funnyman is a subjective talk, and my personal preferences regarding where Joker and Batman place on the funnyman scale deviate considerably from what the general consensus in batman fandom seems to be (or the lot i have seen of it), so i guess i'll just take this opportunity to do personal talk, probably more than usual 😂 take it all with a grain of salt! (an ingradient that you'll find this answer contains a fair bit of actually—)

I dont think Joker is funny one bit, and i dont think he's particularly trying to be in the general sense of the word; to imply that he's "funny" both in-world and on a meta level would mean that being funny is his core motivation and the heart of his actions, that it's the foundational component, and to me it's not. A bit more a matter of personal taste on my part, but i actually feel lowkey irritated with Joker portrayals that lean too heavily on the "HE MAKES JOKES HE'S SO FUNNY!!!!!" act at the expect of every other significant characteristic he has, because like, funny is not who he is, it's just one of the 500 things he does. Sure he started as a fun character meant to bring in a dash of psychopathic delight to the early Batman works, but he has evolved to become so much more than that, which i like better than the more simplistic "he's a funny fun guy!!!!" characterizations. To me Joker is not funny, he is not supposed to be the way you pour salt on your dish but it's not supposed to taste salty, it's supposed to taste /right/. His jokes aren't the main dish, they're an added flavour meant to bring home a certain act: the performance. He's a showman, he's here to put on a good show, and that show doesn't have the end goal of being "fun", it has the goal of being iconoclastic and real and raw. But he can't exactly do raw, raw and sincere scares him, in a way he's a slave to his fear and tries to cage it and tame it and understand it the way Batman is scared of bats and everything they represent and he made them his very persona. Joker tries to be true and geniune and sincere but he can't, so he infuses his actions with jokes to soften the blow, shift the taste a bit. He also has the genius' disease; he wants to be seen through, interpreted, understood and reimagined, mirrored, and it's an itch only a certain fellow fucked up intellectual can scratch for him.

Batman deeply understands the value of a good performance and a viciously planned persona, he is a performer both as Bruce Wayne and as Batman after all. And he has the expertise to dissect and bring out all the nuance in Joker's performance, it's probably why he finds him funny. He understands the theatre piece, both when it's executed in a stellar fashion and when it falls flat on its face. noone else can bring this level of discernment to interpreting Joker like Batman does because what other villains do is actually less performance and more.... outright insanity. I think this is also the reason why Batman enjoys saying the most insane shit and making weird jokes at weird times and have everyone be confused by him, it's part of the performance. There are these little almost invisible acts that Batman and Joker catch of each other, that they want to catch of each other, "i'm shaking the persona a bit", like when an actor improvises a moment to keep the role fresh, but only the people in on the script catch it, to others it feels in accordance, not off enough to catch attention. It's one of their core points of connection and similarity actually, they both have their performances and they both wiggle in its frame, sometimes threatening to break through the confines.

[gale-gentlepenguin]

Did you finish the S2 of the Total Drama Reboot (all the eps are out already) ? I did and while the season started strong the ending flopped badly imo.

Incoming spoilers (and long rant) if you haven't watched it yet:

The winner is not it I'm sorry. Wayne is a cool character but he had zero stand outs moments to justify his win. They tried to recreate Owen's win in Island but at least Owen was really strong in some challenges (including destroying the main villain Heather in the final 3 challenge). Wayne literally flopped hard in almost all of the challenges this season and then got hard carried by his best friend's boyfriend in the final 3 for his win. Also I don't understand how he got so many enthusiastic supporters when Raj and Bowie were the only characters he interacted with from that group, especially cause he didn't even need them as Bowie literally did almost all the work for him by himself.

Julia dominated this season but it felt hollow, she quite literally had no opposition left after she got Bowie booted off. Imagine if Heather got booted in the middle point of World Tour and Alejandro just freely dominated his way into a final 3 with the likes of DJ and Cody (which he somehow would've still lost just to have one of the good guys win). That's pretty much how I felt about the final 3 from this season. Mkulia (and their cheating conflict with Bowraj) did carry the first half, so I'm gonna give them that.

Priyaleb literally got turned into a Skave 2.0 with their flip floppity mess drama just without the "Keith" plot point at the end to bomb out their relationship completely. They turned Priya into a Courtney knock-off who's more obsessed with revenge and winning (even tho she already won a season) than her own boyfriend. She even seems to despise Caleb's personality and is only in love with the idea of having a hot boyfriend (just like Courtney seemed in love with the thrill of being with a bad boy than Duncan himself and we know how that relationship ended up). Honestly if they bring up this couple for another season they're def gonna have a huge messy break up, I just don't see them lasting with the way they've been portrayed in these last S2 eps.

Ngl but I actually enjoyed Ripaxel, even tho they were just the gross comedic relief side couple. Surprisingly Ripper treated Axel like a Queen (unlike Caleb who just kept embarrassing his girl over and over on international tv) and Axel stopped abusing him completely after they started dating, so they're unironically one of the healthiest TDI couples so far. And even tho they're the horny couple at least Ripper really does seem to have genuine feelings for her unlike Priya for Caleb.

And I really hated the Hockey Bros flanderization this season. Last season they were dumb himbos but they were still very competent in the team challenges, heck arguably the best overall from their team. But this season they literally got turned into man children who probably wouldn't be able to cross the street without Bowie around to take them by their hands. Which literally didn't make sense at all when this season was supposed to focus more on them than the last one.

They really had Millie go crazy in that one ep and almost kill Damien just to win a challenge, but honestly I kinda dig that. Her team was so boring that they needed at least one (secretly) unhinged member.

Bowie was clearly weaker as a character this season but he still served. Scary Girl was technically in only 2 episodes and you know she still SERVED. I didn't really care about the other characters this season tbf.

So overall it might still not be the worst season (I mean All Stars and Pahkitew still exist) but season 1 of the Reboot was def superior imo. While I'm not opposed to at least some of this cast coming back in a future season I really hope they create a new cast beforehand if they get the greenlight for new seasons cause they're already exhausting all the plotlines for this one and some of them already started to become flanderized. At the very least they should add new characters and change the location to shake things up if they still want to go ahead with this cast.

So Yes, I did finish Season 2

And much like season 1 I found it mid. I think Season 1 ended stronger, but started pretty weak. While Season 2 was the reverse

I did think it had a promising start, I even liked how Priya and Kaleb were set up for the drama. But after the reveal it kind of... fizzled out. Like they could have milked the drama more and Priya had a right to want revenge but Priya was never such a super angry revenge person before and it felt weird.

They turned Caleb into a complete idiot after they resolved the arc. He was smart, just not game show savvy. That was his thing.

I wouldnt call it anywhere CLOSE to the atrocity that was Skave. But it was a lot less fun. At least Priya calmed down at the end.

But the moment the season went down hill for me was when Damien got eliminated.

I really felt they were setting him up for something good in the character arc department but they didnt. I knew he was doomed the moment he found the immunity idol but it would have been a nice inversion to have HIM use it.

And lets be real, I didnt care about the final 3 at all, I knew Julia wasnt going to win because lets face it she is basically Diet Heather.

They even did something to her hair like Heather.

As for Wayne winning. I didnt care, it was going to be him or Caleb.

Season 2 could have used more Scary Girl. Every scene she was in was gold.

I also appreciated the tasteful cameos of Owen. MacArthur and the Tennis pros.

It wasnt anything awful, but i did find it fizzled out in the later half.

[microcosmiclymbic]

Had an argument with 🍄 earlier.

It wasn't even an argument. 👑 got here and walked right in cause he had to pee, and 🍄 was on the couch naked. Disregulated the hell out of us both.

I was in my room trying to finish up getting ready while 👑 waited outside and 🍄 came in and started rambling/ranting at me how he needs a heads up if someone is coming over.

I told him yeah I agree. I didn't know he'd be coming in either. I'll let you know in the future.

And he wouldn't. Fucking. End.

He was talking in circles getting louder and faster until I popped and said, "please give me space!"

He didn't move and instead started apologizing. Touched my shoulder.

I repeated "please give me space!" Louder. He took one step back and apologized more. Started defending himself saying he didn't mean to bother me.

I cried out, "please give me space!" He said one last sort and hovered in the doorway watching me.

Unhinged, firm, loud, "Please give me space!!!"

He finally respected the boundary and went to his room. Slammed things around in there. Came out, slammed something in the living room. Started pushing furniture around. Then left for a walk.

Overstimulated and overwhelmed I could hardly think, shallow breath. Maybe freeze? I dunno. It sucked.

I texted 👑 and he was slowly pulling me out of my shell by just seeking some communication because for all he knew there was literally no big deal. We've never had a talk on this so makes sense he'd not know. He knows now to communicate if he needs to come in.

Waited for 🍄 came back to offer a hug since he's stated he hates "going to bed angry" and I knew I'd be gone a while. Got a half hug and he expressed upset that I didn't have to be so mean. Harsh? I told him that I was sorry and I wasn't mad at him and he'd done nothing wrong. Me needing space doesn't mean he's done something wrong.

I've communicated to him before that if I'm setting a boundary in the moment that my voice won't be calm. Because I will literally be experiencing not okay feelings that need that boundary in the first place. He assured me he understood. Uh huh.

And now I get home and he's still stuck that he was just trying to explain himself and he doesn't understand why I was that way. I tried to explain that I just needed space and it had nothing to do with him. But he's just not hearing me.

No surprise there. When does he ever actually listen to me without trying to argue unless we're sitting down for a relationship talk after we've already processed the event.

Anyways shout out to 👑 who was looking forward to a long awaited date only for me to be practically catatonic. Fucking huge shout out for him driving just far enough away to park and pulling me into his lap. For asking me if I had words with a yes or no question so that I had the opportunity to communicate that I was stuck. For just sitting with me until I could regulate. Co-regulate? Fuck. He was softly singing along to one song, gently patting me. All I could feel was him, smell his scent. My anxiety couldn't even be bothered that we were technically in view of traffic. I just......fuck. Gods I wish every trauma survivor could have someone hold them the way he did me. It healed something in me fr fr. I've never come back from such a deep dissociation so quick.

And well. I guess 👑 got to see how shitty things can get from literally nothing.

Also shout out to 🍄 for not devolving to passive aggressive texts while I was out. Growth.

[leopardom]

i thought i wouldn't end up making one of those sappy posts before the end of 2023 but here we are i guess

what i wanna say in advance is a huge thank you, and that i'm sorry

this year has been a nightmare for me and i can't stress that word enough. i won't get into details, if you follow me you may have seen some occassional rant posts. long story short though, i'm ending 2023 being mentally exhausted af and even though i'm not in my most optimistic mood, i hope 2024 will not as shitty as 2023

as of my tumblr presence, there have been some changes. i jumped from one fandom to another without completely leaving the bc fandom. i'm just not that much in the mood anymore. maybe this will change once the new album is out? we'll see 👀 and jumping to another fandom means that i lost contact with so many people from the bc fandom. i promise you i didn't do this on purpose and i don't hate or stopped liking any of you. it just... things got weird and a bit too much in my head and now idk how to keep contact without looking extremely weird in this fandom

anyway! entering another fandom has been weird not only in means of interests but also in means of communication. ever since i remember my tumblr activity in any fandom, i always tried to interact as much as possible with other accounts and talk with people, whether that was via posts or messages. in the jo fandom i feel like i have kinda failed that

i'm aware that i post a lot and i'm probably everywhere with the content updates and the gifs. and that may be annoying to some people. and i understand it, i don't like it but i understand it and i wanna apologise for being... all over the place yet not really reaching out to anyone in the fandom or building any kind of online friendship

idk if there's an accurate explanation for the way i feel about this so i'll put it in the best words possible: i wanna make jokes and have fun in here and exchange random messages or mentions in posts and talk shit or not about jo etc, but i feel like my social anxiety (both online and offline) has passed any limit i had put to it until now that i end up thinking it's actually wrong to interact with anyone in this fandom. because everyone has already connected with some people and have built a specific line of interests and you all seem so fucking cool for someone who is as insecure and scared to talk as me so i end up hiding behind my gifs, shitposts and content updates in hopes that people will like me or at least aknowledge i exist in this fandom. and again, that's all on me, there's no one to blame for this behaviour but me and my fucked up mind (which got even more fucked up in the past year). so idk, i feel like i wanna apologise for this, for being like that

however, no matter the anxiety, i must admit that the jo tumblr fandom was actually my escape when things in real life got bad bad. i've spent hours scrolling through the jo and kaarija hashtags in hopes of seeing something unhinged and funny to lift my mood and you know what? i found something every single time. and that was more than nice. if it wasn't for all of you being as funny and crazy (in a positive way) as you are, i'd feel even worse. but every time i open the jo hashtag there's someone posting a wholesome thing or saying something unhinged like how many ways has Kris listed to kill Bojan in his sleep lmao

anyway i ended up writing a lot, this could easily be an entry to the journal that i don't keep but maybe should start keeping. if you read until this point, congratulations for going through all this ramble and i'm sorry

hope 2024 is gonna be a lot different than 2023 but in a good way this time. and i hope i get better and actually get to interact more with all of you great people 💕 and obviously i hope you all have a fantastic year ahead of you 💖