#however it is a pre-req and an easy A

[neonphoenix]

Do I actually need to buy a textbook for my Latin class. Should I just wait.

[magicxc]

Give Me A Try

Pairings: Carol Danvers x OC!Reader x Steve Rogers

Word Count: 4898

Warnings:  a lil nipple action, exhibitionism, fingering, praise kink, overstimulation, slight dom Carol, cunnilingus, pussy slapping

A/N: This request has been 2 years in the making lmfaoo but I'm truly proud of how this turned out. It was supposed to be a one and done but the plot started PLOTTING and my ass just HAD to keep adding more. Unfortunately I simply cannot write really long one shots for I tire easily, so this will be broken up into a few parts. It's the spur of the moment fics like this that really are my *chef's kiss* 🤌🏾 so by all means, please enjoy!!

Chapter 1

Masterlist

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of a cure. That idiom is what my mother would constantly sing throughout the house, a hint of a warning attached to it no doubt. But it wasn’t until I was old enough to really understand the meaning did her words resonate with me in regard to my adventurous childhood.

This was often stressed to me in particular situations such as sneaking around a bees nest in hopes of tasting authentic honey, sliding down the house stairs with a snow sled, jumping off high walls in order to swing from a powerline - all acts fueled by my unlimited curiosity. However my mother was adamant that she didn't know where the hospital was until it was time to go to work, as she was a trauma nurse after all. Although I'm sure she would never let me suffer in agony, she wasn’t too keen on being at work if she wasn’t on the clock. 

These days though I've come to view that idiom with a different set of lens. Freshly graduated from high school, I slowly realised that having all the time in the world to choose a career was quite literally a lie. Time seemed sluggish yet instant all the same and soon enough senior year was passing me by. At first I dabbled with the idea of a gap year and spent many community service hours experimenting with different career fields to get a good sense of what I’d like to do forever. Soon enough I landed on dentistry, initially out of job security but eventually because I enjoyed it. 

As someone who donned braces in middle school that confidence boost is something I wish for everyone, plus the salary and flexibility seemed nice. All in all the more I delve into the field, the comfier it felt, like sinking into a fluffy futon that gradually swallows you whole. Unfortunately the path to dentistry was riddled with bullshit pre-reqs. And while I almost had my fuck it moment, I figured this would lead to a more lucrative outcome than the tik tok influencer route that I originally planned; seeing as this way I would have something reliable to fall back on. It seems ma was right after all in the sense that an ounce of prevention is indeed worth a pound of a cure.

“Considering sexuality is a spectrum, that means there has to be exactly one person out there who is the gayest.”

“Carol what the fuck are you on about?” I giggled.

“Hear me out, a leather skirt with the platform boots to match? It doesn't get gayer than that babe.”

“It’s called fashion, thank you.”

“There is literally a picture of Cara Delevigne on your shirt,” she pointed out. "Not to mention those fishnet stockings and that tight ass corset."

“I’m not about to do this with you.”

"Listen sweetness, I don’t mind,” she winked. “You can be gayer than me any day.”

“GOODBYE Carol!” 

“I love youuuu,” she sang as we separated down the halls.

“Yeah yeah, I love you too,” I yelled over my shoulder.

Introductory to College Success is a great starter class for those unsure of what life holds for them, however it’s a money grab for others that are. Riddled with hypothetical questions, life goals, and career fields, the class offers a good outlook on the possibilities of life after highschool, but not for $350 per credit hour. Too bad it’s mandatory for all freshman students. The upside of it all is the easy A that this class is supposed to guarantee. Stepping into the threshold, I settle into the seat closest to the back, more comfortable with the idea of not being seen and certainly not being called on. 

“Good morning class, I’m Professor Rogers and before we get started I need y’all to give me like 10 stars on that rate my professor app.”

Yeahhh this about to be the easiest A I’ve ever gotten cause aint no way.

|~~

“Cam, say sike right the fuck now!!” Carol squealed. “And what did you do after that?”

“I gave him a 5 star rating, what you mean?”

Head thrown back, I watched as Carol bursted at the seams at the retelling of my first day of class. She couldn’t believe it and neither could I if I’m being honest - shock still at the forefront of my mind that Professor Rogers isn’t as mythical as people made him out to be. He’s chill, assigns easy ass work, and has a 100% pass rate with his students. If only all my pre-req professors worked that way.

Word around town is that Mr. Rogers is somewhat of a nepo baby, this job being a direct offer from the college president seeing as Mr. Stark is like an uncle of sorts. Whether he qualifies or not is none of my business so long as I pass his class, and by the looks of it, it’s off to a pretty good start. 

Legs softly brushing against Carols underneath the table of the quaint coffee shop, the loud whiz of the blender fades into the background as I listen intently to her first day of college chronicles. Distant chatter helps fill the noisy atmosphere while the doorbell chimes with each new customer. A quick peek out the window has me noticing that the leaves are beginning to turn and I want so badly to savor the last bit of warmth before fall becomes full fledged. 

Snaking her hand in mine, I kiss along her warm skin, a request in between each peck of us finishing this conversation outside. Thankfully it doesn’t take her long to accept, that same hand reaching around my face to twist her fingers through my curls. Wrapping up the last bits of our coffee we leave the coffee shop, fingers interlocked in lieu of our next mission.

|~~

“Ohhh, one of my professors mentioned a popular lake nearby that’s supposed to be really scenic,” she quipped over the steering wheel.

“Is it isolated? Cause you know I don’t get down like that Carol, that's the type of shit that’ll have us end up on the ID channel.”

“Relax, it’s like 5 minutes off the main road and it’s actually known to be a lovers paradise."

Eyeing the cell phone mounted on the dash for directions, one hand on the wheel while the other cradles the back of my headrest, she makes a particularly tricky maneuver; her tongue darting between pink lips as it hangs on the corner in concentration. Fingers reaching into my hair, I gently twirl them around, entranced at how she manages to make the mundane look hot.

As racy as my thoughts get rolling for Carol, it's truly the little things she does that warms my insides - like how during the winter she puts my towel in the dryer so it’s extra warm when I get out the shower or making me a pottery mug just for tea after learning that I’d drink it almost every day. She usually takes the world for what it is and views it with a small sense of naivety, choosing instead to see the good in all; and sometimes I wish, if only for a second, that I could see things through her lens - with such light and curiosity. 

“Now I see why the lake is named Shady Depths," she said pulling into the bushes.

“Now Carol-”

“I know, I know, trust me I had the same idea; but apparently it garnered its name from the many cheating scandals that took place there.”

“Girl, not you taking me to a place where relationships meet their end.”

Tossing a bottle cap at me, Carol goes on to mention how we can be the reason the lake gains another type of reputation and also that our relationship shouldn’t be built around superstition.

“Mhmm, are you sure that’s the ONLY reason it’s called Shady Depths?”

“Don’t tell me you’re getting scared?” she feigns surprise.

“Being scared and aware are two very different things.”

“As someone majoring in dentistry I’m pretty sure you can handle a few minutes at this lake.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” I asked, slurping the last bits of coffee, the hallow noise of the straw a clear indication that the sticky goodness was finished. 

“Cam, the human mouth is terrifying. I saw what my niece's looked like before the silver teeth and let's just say I was never the same.”

At that I choked on my spit, a haughty combination of laughter and hacking the result of my carelessness. But I can’t help being so care-free around Carol, her authentic nature comforting enough to bring out my kooky personality.

It’s been about two years since we’ve made things official. We’d met sophomore year at our highschools trivia night - a game night dedicated to all the social club participants to celebrate the end of the school year. Chocked full of snacks, fun music, and fierce competition it was typically the highlight of the final semester for all involved. At some point during the games, Carol and I had found ourselves on opposing teams, making it to the final round three different times, and what started out as initial frustration soon blossomed into genuine curiosity. 

Shortly after, the familiar face that I’d pass by in the hallways began accompanying me to after school hangouts, study sessions, and the occasional sleep over. A soft brushing of the hands here and prolonged eye lingering there, we’d come to realise that there was something between the two of us and while Carol had always been so sure of herself, it was me that had to work up the courage to be at the same level of comfort. All it took was one rainy night and a promise to see where things would take us that led to this very moment - pulling into what feels like a page out of a magazine book. 

While secluded areas aren't typically my thing, this lake does bring a soothing sense of familiarity to it as if I, too, had spent some fun nights out here. There’s a dock at the edge of the shore that extends about 100 feet into the water, with a pool ladder that dips into what looks to be no more than five steps beneath the chilling surface. As the sun sets beneath the horizon its golden rays spread across each ripple of water, glimmering with the last remnants of the physical representation of the day. Although inviting, I know the water is far from warm, the sun providing only a source of light rather than heat; however it can be a relief on a hot sunny day as opposed to the cooling 70° that drifts through the autumn air. There’s chairs scattered near the dock, remains of what looks to be a bonfire littered around, and deep into the corners are a pair of hammocks tied to the trees. This is definitely a place I can see myself visiting if not for the scenery, then certainly the serenity that it brings.

Cutting the engine, Carol shifts toward me, her eyes gleaming with mischief, an I told you so on the tip of her tongue as she clocked the way that I admired the area. 

“I don’t wanna hear it. You ate that lil one thing or whatever.”

“I did what?” she asked, hand cupping her ear. 

“You did your big one Carol damn,” I chuckled. “This lake is actually really quaint.”

“Mhmm yeah, some of the locals were talking about it earlier and I just had to see for myself what all the hype was about.” “I genuinely wouldn’t mind coming out here with some snacks next time or even just to do some homework,” I commented, gaze lingering over the small waves.

“I’m looking at a snack right now,” Carol chirped, tongue darting out of her mouth and swiping across her lips.

Leaning across the console, just low enough for my breasts to peek over the neckline of my shirt, I reach over and slid my tongue against hers; the feel of it moist and thick as she looped it around mine, mouth opening to accept me entirely. The bitter taste of coffee greets my taste buds and I delve deeper into the kiss, nose brushing against Carols as I gladly accept the remnants of her earlier refreshment. 

Tracing over the hem of my shirt, Carols expert hands trail upward, her nimble finger tips rolling each nipple through the fabric with her thumb and forefinger until I cry out into the kiss. 

Mouth swallowing my mewls, Carol releases me with a slippery pop, suggesting that we take this party outside, preferably on the hood of the car.

“Are you serious?” I screeched, eyes bulging from their sockets.

“C’mon, I thought you’ve always wanted to try a little exhibitionism.”

“Yeah, back then when I was young and dumb.”

“You’re still young and dumb,” she teased.

A few playful slaps land on her arm at the remark, her insistence becoming more convincing by the minute. After all, we were the only ones here and the place echoed loud enough to hear any approaching tires against the gravel, which would give us just enough time to collect ourselves. 

“Carol you have until sunset, so you better make it quick,” I urged. 

“By the looks of it that’s in 15 minutes, 20 tops,” she replied. “It’s all good though cause I’ve made you cum in less.”

Heat rising to the surface of my cheeks, I have to look away, her aura and down right naughty words too much for me to physically handle at this point. Using her fingers, she redirects my face toward hers, pecking my lips while lightly dragging hers to the side of my jaw, effectively ordering me to get out of the car and onto the hood.

Pulling away and stepping out, I gently shut the door close, trying my best to keep quiet in the off chance that lingering ears are close by. We both saunter to the front of the car, my hand reaching over the steel to get a feel of if I can comfortably sit there. Palm pressed flatly against the surface, Carol stands behind me, her face in my neck as her palm sits parallel to mine.

“Feels *kiss* about *kiss* right *kiss* to *kiss* me.”

“Are you sure this won’t burn me? I have very sensitive thighs,” I nervously admitted, bottom lip caught between my teeth.

“I’ve seen you shower in water hotter than this sweetness, but if it gets too much just let me know and we’ll stop, mhmkay.”

Nose crinkling at the thought that we’re actually going through with this, I gently hop on top of the car and carefully scoot my way up to the middle of the hood. 

“God I’m so glad that you wore a skirt today.”

It was primarily a fashion choice. Had I known that it’d be serving other purposes, I would’ve opted for a softer material rather than this sticky leather. 

Lips harshly colliding with mine, Carol's eagerness is on full display, teeth clashing in the mix of our spit swapping kiss. Her hands hike my skirt up as I lift my hips to help with the process. Sliding my panties to the side, she wastes no time in shoving her fingers inside me, twisting them around to get an idea of just how much moisture needs to be added to the equation, if any.

“What a slut,” she taunts. “Five minutes in and you’re already wet enough to end the water crisis.” 

“Carol,” I whimpered, annoyed that she can find the time to talk while her fingers have come to a standstill. 

“Nuh uh you want it so bad, come show me just how you want my fingers to feel.”

‘Wha- huh? I don’t understand.”

“Ride my fingers and if you do it well enough, I may just use them.”

“Ca-”

“Ride them,” she demanded. 

Legs spread apart, I dig my heels in the bumper of the car for balance, hips rising ever so slightly as I begin to carefully drive them towards Carols fingers. Slowly sliding down I start a slight bouncing movement, shifting down and then back up again as Carol intentionally keeps her fingers still. 

“That’s it,” she coos. “Just keep going like that and you’ll find your groove.”

And just like that I went, feet planted onto the car as I did my best to glide down her slender fingers. My palms dig into the hood, its warmth radiating heat to my already hot body. And thankfully it starts to feel good, good enough for me to inch my way further down each time, careful not to slip entirely. 

“Good girl,” she praises. “Look at you, deep in concentration just for a taste of my fingers.”

My thighs begin to burn at the balance I have to maintain, forehead moist at the workout I find myself in. But still I continue, deliberate in my ministrations, this time reaching for the base of her knuckles.

At that she pulls back, making my goal post further than it needs to be, frustration etched onto my features.

“That’s cheating,” I huffed. 

“Yeah well, I can’t make it too easy for you,” she chirped. 

“This isn’t easy at all.”

“Nothing in life ever is, now do it again.”

“I’ll drop if I-”

At that she thrusts her fingers into my core, quick enough to surprise me and deep enough to cause a little discomfort, my retort effectively cut off.

“You’ll what, you'll drop? When have I ever dropped you?” she questioned. “When did you stop trusting me huh?”

Reaching forward she drags my bottom lip forward with her teeth, burying them into the soft flesh until my whines crescendoed. She eventually lets it go, pulling back only to scold me further. 

“Did you actually think me so careless that I’d let you hurt yourself? That I can’t see past my own lust?”

Was it annoyance or anger? I couldn’t really tell. Carol’s fingers never slowed down enough for my mind to catch up with her words. Insistent on pumping them inside of me, all I could do was sit there and wail, her digits now curled upward as she continued thrusting them.

“And do you really think that I should let you cum?”

Now that I caught. Caught it quick enough to realise that my hips were pushing against her fingers, meeting them each time her hand pulled back in a desperate attempt to hit my peak. But the implication that I may not, had my eyes glossy with tears, irritated that Carol could even think to deprive me after all those hoops she's so excitedly make me jump through. 

“Don’t even worry, cause I’m about to give you all that and more.”

Thumb placed on the pearl of my clit, she vigorously circles it, her fingers continuing their come hither motion as my hips bounced against her knuckles. Belly caved in, chest tight, and head numb, I couldn’t help the tears that brimmed over and cascaded down my cheeks, head thrown back as I felt the water works slide down my ass.

My brain was so foggy, it didn’t register that Carol never stopped. It took me coming again to notice that she intended to work my body past the confines of comfort and on any other day I truly wouldn’t mind the challenge. But here, in this secluded ass wilderness, with darkness just around the corner had me calling a timeout. 

Gathering the little energy I have left, both arms shot out and locked around her dominant one, slowing her skilled movements in a pathetic plea to slow down or stop altogether; begging for which I truly couldn't tell.

“I don't know, it wouldn’t seem fair to cheat you out of feeling so good,” she feigns concern.

“Carol please don’t.”

“Silly me, I forgot just how much of a hands on learner you are, like when you learned just how many times you could cum.”

Truth be told I still don’t know as I lost count after the eighth. Tales from the straights had me nervous about being able to make it to the finish line, let alone being able to do it more than once in a single setting. However, questioning Carol on such a fact did give me the answers I needed, just not in the way I expected as I passed out that night.

Carol has a way of telling me what I want, but to the extreme. This is her weird way of building trust and proving that actions do speak louder than words, so the next time she asks me to ride her fingers, I'm gonna do that shit with no hands to see just how good those reflexes are when put to the test. 

“Besides, what happened to the whole sunset thing?” she quipped.

“The deal was you could make me cum before it sets,” I panted. “Now lets see what I could do with the six minutes of light we have left.”

Eyebrows arched, a challenging grin meets my tired one, Carols competitive urge no doubt itching to stop her in her tracks so that it gets the chance to shine. Slowly removing her fingers from inside me, she coaxes my mouth open for me to clean them, rolling each digit over my tongue as she drives them forward in a rocking type motion. 

“You have exactly five minutes to show me how this wouldn’t be a complete waste of time,” she cautioned, diving in for a soft kiss.

Helping me off the car, Carol mounts herself atop the hood in my place, watching through hooded eyes as I fixed my clothing. Skirt straightened and shirt tucked, I look up to see that Carol already assumed the position, her legs spread wide with her clothed pussy on full display. 

“I see you get a kick out of being a little dominatrix,” I teased, referring to the damp spot in the middle of her underwear. 

“Oh trust me there isn’t anything little about me, and you have four minutes left before I get down there and show you.”

She always has to one up me, but I’m gonna take a page out of her book and let my actions do the talking. I wanna see just how smart that mouth is when she gets to whimpering like a bitch in heat.

Wasting no time, I attach my lips to her pussy through the underwear, her sharp intake of breath just waiting to let loose at the inevitable contact of skin on skin; and as much as I want to hold out, as much as I want to drag out this feeling, the sun won't last too much longer.

Slipping my fingers inside the fabric she finally lets loose, blowing out the sweet release that lets me know that I'm on the right track. Tongue darting past my lips, I lick a trail up the center, making sure to stop at her dripping heat before diving inside and twisting it around. Carols sticky excitement gets smeared across my chin in the process of it all and I gently scrape my teeth across her lips to keep her feisty ass on edge. 

Glancing above, we lock eyes but mine can’t help focusing on the sky behind her which seems to be darkening by the second and so I drag my face upward, tongue noisily sliding across her slick pussy until it reaches her shy bud peeking through the hood. 

“Even in sex you manage to be challenging,” I taunted, palm rising up to land on her core. 

Her hips jump forward and I have to physically hide the smile that threatens to creep up, my hand once more connecting with her skin in attempt to see just how flustered she’d get. 

thwack

“There she is, she’s just a little shy huh?” I cooed, thumb coming up to circle the now fully protruded bud. “Talk to me Carol, why you so quiet all of a sudden mhmm?”

“I’m just waiting -”

Before she could finish, I clamped my mouth to her clit, squeezing and sucking until I knew for sure any fiery remark was effectively doused. It’s such a turn on for me, watching my strong girl get so weak in the knees, watching intently as she ate her fucking words every time.

She can’t help but buck those slutty hips toward my face, unintentionally chasing the high I’d so gladly give her, but its the closing of her legs that has my face upturned. Thighs locking around my neck, I use both my hands to pin them to the cooling hood, my lips now a vacuum as it harshly suctions against her glistening pearl. She settles for aimlessly thrashing about, the steel of the car bending in ways Im not entirely sure we can fix.

“You have tw- two minutes lef- uhhh ahhh,” she screeches.

She never misses a chance to talk her shit and I'll never miss a opportunity to turn down a challenge, adding my two fingers to the mix to help speed things along.

The car shakes viciously, her thighs struggling underneath my hand, my fingers no doubt leaving behind an imprint of just how good this night will end for her. Soon enough Carol’s fingernails graze my scalp, her hands pulling at my hair in all sorts of gratifying ways; a heavy hum of approval slipping past my lips and sending direct shock waves to her insides. 

The driving of my fingers never cease, and it's the way she clenches her hips, lifting them ever so slightly that lets me know just how dangerously close she is. Thirsty seconds left on the clock and I all but power speed through the final seconds, my mouth no doubt borderline painful on her now swollen clit.

In the knick of time I feel the dam of Carols walls break down, overflowing with her sticky essence as a result of probably the hardest work I’ve put in. She lies flatly on the car, her chest heavily panting as she takes a minute to rejoin me back on earth.

“Talk to me nice or don’t talk to me twice. FIVE MINUTES? Who the fuck could ever get you going in such a short time?” I bragged.

“You did your big one Cam damn,” she mimicked from earlier today, lengthy breaths puffing past her mouth as she struggles to catch herself.

“Yeah that’s right, now come put those lips on mine and see just how fucking delectable you taste.”

Smiling, she raises up off the hood of the car, grunting at the effort it took and slid down ever so slightly until her mouth met mine; soft kisses at first, that soon turned passionate; her hands coming up to cup my cheeks for an easier maneuver. 

Splashing from the water breaks the kiss, both of us craning our necks to see where the source is coming from, but all that greets us is how beautifully the moon kisses the rippling water, it’s pale reflection sitting atop the never ending tide. All remnants of the day is gone, the darkness swallowing the area whole and now adding a eerie vibe to the once peaceful scene. 

“C’mon C, let's head out,” I suggested. “I don’t care what that sound was and I’m not sticking around to find out. 

“It’s probably just a tree branch or a small animal taking a nightly dive,” she chuckled. 

“Again, I’m sticking around to find out.”

Laughing, she jumps from the hood, her wobbly footing almost sending her crashing to the ground. Helping with her stance, we fix her dress and head inside the car for some relief from the cooling breeze. 

“Whadya say, think we can buff out those dents?” Carol teases, revving the engine.

“Girl that’s tomorrow's problem. All I care about right now is a shower and some food.”

“Yes ma’am,” she concedes, her hand finding a permanent place on my thigh. “How are you feeling? I wasn’t too rough was I?”

“No, just mean,” I confess. 

“I’m sorry sweetness, sometimes I can go a little overboard. But all you gotta do is say the word and I’ll stop right in my tracks, knuckles deep and all.”

Palm slapped across my mouth, I fell into a fit of giggles at Carol's refusal to mince her words. Thankfully she’s never gotten too rough with me and was always right there with the perfect amount of aftercare to make sure that things never made me feel degraded.

Carol’s rough is borderline dominatrix whereas my rough is just me talking my shit. We both switch depending on our immediate moods, sex between us a combination of dom and sub behaviours from both parties, but at the end of it all is where we come together to make sure that everyone is on one accord.

“Im gonna run us a bath when we get back to the apartment and we can order from that Thai place down the street?” she offers. 

“Thats only if I don't fall asleep right away.”

“Oh sweetness, I won’t let that happen. Cause you still owe me two more rounds and I’ll be damned if I don’t get them.”

[thompsborn]

Hello!!! i’m so interested in the HB2 plot! I feel like we see peter angst way more commonly than Harley—so if you ever feel up for rambling about it under a cut or a spoiler tag this is a free space to do so! He really is my blorbo and you’re my favorite fic writer so I know whatever happens it’ll be amazingly done but I’m dying for hints at more of what that’ll look like! Are we talking, like, caught in the literal crossfire or devastating hostage situation 😂

okay before i do the harley rambles i!? I’m your favorite fic writer??? my guy what the FUCK that’s so sweet but also have u read any of sarah’s fics?? oddy’s parkner fic or oddy’s parksborn fic??? ANY of the Classic Iconic parkner fics circa 2020-2021?

i’m actually very VERY slowly making a parkner fic rec list to post at some point but just. WHAT. there are So many INCREDIBLE fic writers and saying i’m your favorite is BONKERS to me but also so nice i ??? thank you??? oh my god???? ❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙

okay anyway sorry to what the ask was actually about pfkfj, HARLEY!!! i agree it’s definitely a lot easier to come across peter angst than harley angst, which most likely has to do with the fact that there is a LOT of material to draw from for peter’s character—various movies, comics, shows, timelines and universes and the games. it’s a lot easier to come up with angst for peter because there’s a lot of canon angst to choose from AND there’s so much content for him that it’s a lot easier to get a grasp on his character and create angst based on that, you know? but as a fandom we have definitely created many ideas of harley based on when he was a kid in im3 and his cameo in endgame, plus the WEB comics + ride at avengers campus, so harley angst is for sure out there but like you said it is NOT easy to come across lmao

as for the HB2 plot—i have an ask in my drafts from like a month or two ago asking for more information about hb2 and i’m gonna try to finally finish answering that and post it sometime today, so that post will definitely include some insight in what to expect from the sequel, but harley in hb2 specifically? i GOTCHU.

OKAY !!! let's do this!!

so homeward bound, as i've said before, is PETER'S story post no way home, right? but in hb2 it's peter AND HARLEY'S story post homeward bound. the first chapter is a recap of the first fic from harley's pov with a lot of extra bits thrown in, starting on the day that thanos first snapped and ending either where the first fic ends or maybe in the summer between school years. unsure as of now but one of those, for sure. so that's going to offer a lot of perspective about harley's character in homeward bound - his thought processes, how he was feeling in a lot of key moments during the first fic, things he was doing while peter wasn't around, etc etc etc.

but in hb2, after the recap in the first fic, it picks up at the start of their second year at ESU. he might still be roommates with harry. he might not be. it won't be the same room at the very least, so no matter what, there's going to be some changes, right? but also:

everything is different.

there are the small changes - not the same room, harder classes as they climb their way through the pre-reqs, potentially a different roommate, some stuff happened over summer, etc.

but also there are the BIG changes, like his dynamic with peter, and knowing that peter is spidey and now being a part of keeping that a secret due to peter not wanting anyone else to know. he also knows about the spell and he knows that peter is someone tony loved, someone that pepper and morgan and happy and rhodey knew and cared about, and none of them remember him, but they know harley.

with harley's pov comes the reintroduction of the rest of the world, basically. peter has no one, right? his old life was completely destroyed and erased, leaving no connections to the people he used to know, so he's been VERY closed off from everyone and everything.

harley, however, still knows pepper and morgan and happy and rhodey. he still talks to them on a regular basis. he has his mom and his sister. he isn't closed off in classes like peter is, actually having conversations with his classmates, even if he has no interest in befriending them. peter's pov has been very limited because his world has been completely changed. harley's has been changed too via the loss of tony and him being dead for five years while his mom and his sister had to adapt to a life without him there, but it's not been changed to the extent of peter's, you know?

harley is going to have a few struggles in hb2, some centered around peter, some not. there's going to be family stuff. there's going to be this urge to tell pepper and them about peter because he thinks that peter would benefit from having these people in his life again but also he wants to respect the fact that peter doesn't feel ready to do that.

there's going to be some conflict about the people in his life learning that he's involved with spider-man's business somehow. there's going to be people getting angry at spider-man because of it.

a lot of mental and emotional turmoil is going to come out of all this. but, in the physical sense, he's not going to be entirely safe, either. again, people are going to realize he's somehow connected to spidey. he's going to want to do whatever he can do to help peter, to the point where he's going to get a little reckless with it sometimes.

caught in the crossfire? yeah.

hostage situation? no. at least, not in hb2. not that i currently have planned. that could change, but as of my current plans, no.

hope that's enough information to build some intrigue >:)

[illithiddreams]

Elden Ring tips / hints for beginners

Have I beat this game no, have I got to the last boss however yes so here's some hints because I am still garbage at this game but am learning tricks / hints that may help new players as well as learning from mistakes I made my first playthroughs. Spoilers below

You can technically get a +10 somber stone weapon from the start of the game or least +5 if you don't want to go do an annoying boss. First 4 are easily in the lakes / limgrave (without even buying them), 5 is in Caelid near where you spawn from the chest, 6 / 7 are in Volcano manor by taking the shortcut in the academy, 8 / 9 are from dragonburrow scarabs, and 10 is from Varre's quest in the chest past the tadpoles.

I wrote before about the dragon glitch I can not stress this enough do this first thing in the game then go to stormveil then to Varre's quest to get to the bird it makes the game broken cause you don't have to do anything level up wise.

To go to roundtable early / first thing in the game go to the lakes or Caelid and sit at a grace.

You are meant to guard counter the tutorial boss (Do you know how long it took me to know this because I am dumb and don't read - . - )

Patches if you spare him gives him the BEST ARMOR IN THE GAME later on as well as 4 emotions and a decent faith weapon.

Godskin in volcano manor is easy if you put him to sleep same with the others.

If you join the manor before talking to patches again in Altus you miss a rare cutscene with him.

The first guy you kill in the VM questline is the guy you can summon for boc's quest in the cave with the duo fight.

Lightning magic scales dumbly off of dex meaning putting it on a dex weapon is your best option.

Use the finger print shield to help with the archers in the weird place in the snowfield to get to the malenia boss.

Make sure you have 60 vigor before that area it's almost a pre req.

You can summon bliadd for the forlorn fight and if you do so you get a somber stone 2 and also if you talk to him again then go to the lake after this you can get a very good talisman early in the game.

If you get all the death root you get a rare dialogue option during a boss fight.

You can find Rogier's death blood stain in Stormveil near Godwyns weird body and it shows him dying of deathblight

Lock on can be used to show friendly npcs as you can't lock on them if they aren't agroed.

You have to talk to Kale to get Blaidd down btw idk why the game doesn't tell you this.

I know it's tempting to kill Gostoc because he steals your runes but if you keep him alive he gives you a Ancient smithing stone near the end of the game.

If you are having trouble with Stormveil you can leave there is a path on the map around it to the lakes go fight other stuff first then come back or just explore.

YOU CAN CHEESE THE FIRST BELL BEARING ASSHOLE IN THE SHACK BY LURRING HIM OVER TO THAT ONE CAMP THEN JUST SUMMON! SAME WITH THE DEATHBIRD.

You can level summons before stormveil castle and get a golden seed by just going to the lakes after talking to Roderika.

[realtalk-princeton]

Somewhat related to the topic of cwr being an easy 5th & undecided profros hanging around RTP recently. does anybody else think that BSE prereqs kind of undermine the whole princeton liberal arts academic exploration message? Like realistically freshman cant really explore stuff cos theyre locked into prereqs -.-

Response from Olive:

yes & no. I definitely agree that the number of requirements you have to get started with completing as soon as you get here is overwhelming and restrictive. however, bse students are also required to complete at least 7 humanities / social science courses during their time here which is intended to be the liberal arts incorporation. with 8 semesters, you'll likely complete one per semester so your schedule isn't entirely bse pre-reqs or major-related courses.

Response from Halocline:

definitely agree with Olive here. also, the restriction of prereqs is just the nature of pursuing an engineering degree. you’re going to have to take these courses no matter what school you attend if you want an accredited degree. engineering isn’t really a major that allows for liberal arts exploration in many cases but princeton does its best to enforce some exploration of the humanities and social sciences in addition to building a strong quantitative background

[byologee]

an actually practical guide to being premed and getting into med school by someone who did it successfully

Majors and Classes:

Personally I feel you should choose a major that will be complementary to your premed studies-- something STEM or social science based that overlaps with your premed classes and will allow you to take upper level science classes that relate to physiology, disease and illness, pharmacology, etc. HOWEVER do not let this deter you from majoring in a non-bio STEM area like biochem or from pursuing a different science or liberal arts major.

That being said, consider double majoring in Public Health because it is very relevant to premed and going into medicine.

Make sure you take the correct order of bio and chem classes. This is important so that you take classes at the appropriate time when you have the appropriate skill level and so that you do not have any gaps in your premed education or major classes.

Be aware of what upper level bio and chem classes require prereqs that are not a part of your major requirements or premed requirements; for example some upper level bio classes require microbio which is not a premed requirement at all schools NOR always a major requirement. Plan your underclassmen years accordingly to allow you to fit in certain prereqs for upper level classes.

If you plan on taking lower level lab intensive courses, take them as an underclassman-- they will prepare you with basic lab skills you can apply to upper level classes and to irl lab work, plus most of your classmates will be underclassmen. You do not want to take these lower level lab intensive courses as an upperclassman. You will be bored and probably annoyed.

Take an intro level public health class as an underclassmen to see if you are interested in public health; this will also be relevant to your med school apps.

Gen chem 1 and orgo 1 are weedout classes. Many people will switch from premed and/or bio to public health or prePA after taking gen chem 1 and orgo 1. This is normal; don’t be judgemental. If you’re the one switching to public health or prePA, don’t feel bad or ashamed.

Do not take orgo 1 or 2 with super hard progressors. It’s just not worth it. Many people say that harder orgo progressors prepare you better for the MCAT, but this is false as the MCAT does not have a lot of orgo on it. Many people will fail out of orgo even without super hard professors. Set yourself up for success by taking orgo profs with good reputations, not profs with reputations for failing everyone, being purposefully difficult, or just nasty.

If you take a (relatively) “easy” professor for orgo 1, under no circumstances should you take a hard prof for orgo 2. You will suffer.

The best way to study orgo 1 and 2 is to memorize all the reactions. Copy reactions until you have them memorized. Then you can simply apply what you’ve memorized to synthesis reactions. This works for NMR too, just memorize what NMR specs look like and apply.

Always go to TA office hours for gen chem 1, 2 lab and orgo 1, 2 lab. The lab reports are very difficult and the TAs can help you more than professors can. Professors will be mostly absent for labs. TAs will know what’s up.

You do not need to take biochem 2 for the MCAT, biochem 1 will suffice as it generally covers amino acids and proteins and not respiration and metabolism. Most of the biochem on the MCAT is about amino acids and proteins; all metabolism can be self-studied. (This is my opinion to save you time, if your advisors tell you otherwise LISTEN TO THEM and not me).

If you take AP psychology you do not need to take intro psych.

You need to take a sociology course for the MCAT and premed reqs. You should take The Sociology of Deviance if offered at your college as this is more relevant to the MCAT than intro socy.

If you have to take a professional writing class for Gen Eds, try to take a science writing or health professions writing course as these will be relevant to you.

Take stats even if you don’t have to as it is very relevant for understanding papers.

If you switch to another pre-health path like prePA or prepharm you will generally have to take different prereqs. Clear this with your advisors and come up with a plan.

Med schools like to see a diversity in courses and not just science courses, so you need to take at least 8 humanities credit hours. Diversify your college education and take interesting and relevant humanities courses; this will also help with CARS on the MCAT.

Research

Many medical schools want you to have research experience. You can do clinical research or bench research.

You should start research early, either 2nd semester freshman year or summer before sophomore year.

The best advice is to research professors and PIs in the BSCI and public health departments and email ones you are interested in about working in their lab. You can do this before 2nd semester freshman year or during that semester. Email example: Hi Dr. X, I am an undergraduate freshman at UMD and am looking for research opportunities in X field. I discovered your lab and read your paper, “X,” and am very interested in this subject! Elaborate on what interested you I was wondering if there are any open positions in your lab for an undergraduate researcher. I have taken X, X, X, courses. I would be interested in working in your lab for 2 years. Please let me know if you have any openings! Best, X

PIs generally look for undergrads to commit to 2 years of research, but you can quit earlier if you feel like it. This is also why you should do research earlier-- that way you are not cramming it in during your upperclassman years.

The goal is to get some abstracts, posters, presentations, and maybe a pub out of it, but these things aren’t absolutely necessary.

Clinical Experience

Med schools like to see 10 months of continuous clinical experience, which translates to about 200 hours. However, this number is too low and to be really competitive for med school apps you should aim for 1000 hours if not more.

The best way to gain clinical experience is to work part time as a scribe, CNA, MA, or tech. You can take CNA and MA courses the summer before sophomore or junior year and apply to positions online. CNA/MA gives you a lot of experience working with patients. Scribing gives you a lot of experience working with doctors and seeing what they do. It’s best to start clinical experience sophomore year or junior year so you can gain enough hours prior to applying.

You should also have clinical volunteering hours which you can get by volunteering at hospitals such as Children’s or Shady Grove or any other local hospital. Other clinics also accept volunteers, you just have to look around. Check your health professions advising office (hereon abbreviated as HPAO) for their recommendations and job listings if available.

You can also shadow doctors. Your HPAO may have a continuously updating list of physicians in your area who are available to shadow. You can also genuinely just email local providers. Note that you will need to shadow a DO if applying DO.

Check your HPAO listserv for job openings and clinical volunteering opportunities.

You can find jobs by googling “CNA job near me” or “scribe job near me” and browsing postings on Indeed and other job sites, or alternatively postings on hospital sites.

Community Service

Med schools like to see 10-12 months of continuous community service, or around 200 hours. This is too low, and you should aim for around 600 to be a competitive applicant.

Join school listservs and look for volunteer postings. Go to your school’s First Look Fair or college organization fair (usually held at the beginning of each semester) and sign up for emails from clubs that do volunteering or other various organizations. There are many organizations on campus that do volunteering and service.

Ideally you want to work with marginalized communities off campus. This sounds shitty but you want to work with communities who need it. You should also aim for a sustained service opportunity, not a once a month thing but a weekly, continuous experience. Volunteering through clubs and societies like the women’s premed organization are not valid experiences.

Google local homeless shelters, women’s shelters, STD testing clinics, and food banks-- these are all really good places to volunteer at. You can also volunteer at crisis hotlines.

You can also utilize clinical experience for community service, so volunteering at a hospital, clinic, urgent care, etc. But you also need non-clinical community service, so make sure to prioritize both.

Consistency is key. Doing an experience for a longer period of time (ex. 4 hours every week for 10 months- year) is very valuable. Even doing an hour of volunteering at the same place every week for two years is great. Building relationships, gaining experience, understanding consistency-- med schools value this. Long term experience is very important.

Extracurriculars

You should also be involved in extraneous, non-community service based organizations and extracurriculars. It’s ok if these organizations include some aspect of community service. This can also include paid-positions that are not clinical.

Examples include campus ministries, sports, dance, art clubs, music/choir, social, restorative, and environmental justice organizations, interest groups, tutoring, co-ed frats, etc.

Joining societies, like the American Women’s Medical Association or your college’s namesake Pre-Med Society is a great way to do extracurriculars, build your resume, and get leadership experience. You can also join major-specific societies.

Check with your HPAO for a list of pre-health societies you can join. Your college will also have a website or list of clubs and orgs you can investigate.

Med schools like to see that you are well-rounded, so having a variety of experiences is important.

Advising

It is extremely important that you build a relationship with your advisors. It is very important that you outline all the classes you want to take with them and when AND that you meet with them every semester. Discuss your plans with them, ask questions, ask for suggestions and tips. If you make any major or minor changes you need to speak with them too. They are a resource; use them.

You will also need to build a relationship with your pre-med advisors at your HPAO. You may need to do an intro workshop to be able to meet with an advisor at your HPAO.

Meet with an HPAO advisor every semester to outline your courseload, volunteering, clinical work, extracurriculars, and application plan. Your HPAO advisor will help you craft a narrative for med school apps and can help advise you with regards to coursework and what opportunities to pursue. They can help you decide when to take the MCAT, when to apply, devise a school list, etc. so it’s best to start meeting with them early. The better your relationship with your HPAO advisor, the stronger the recommendation letter you’ll get from them.

If your grades drop you NEED to speak with an HPAO advisor. You should be checking in with them every semester to go over your grades and course history and make sure you are on the right track to apply. This is really really crucial.

If your HPAO offers workshops for applying to med school, crafting a school list, financing med school, writing a personal statement, etc. then GO TO THEM. Utilize the resources that are available to you.

Make sure you are on your HPAO listserv.

If your HPAO offers peer to peer advising consider using this resource to speak with current college students who are going through the application process.

2 Areas Med Schools Look At: Leadership + Diversity and Inclusion

These are two hot topics med schools care about. Here is how to address them.

Leadership: there are numerous ways to gain leadership experience; getting elected to a leadership position in a club or organization, being a TA or UA, getting a management position at your job, or being any kind of team leader in a community service endeavor. The important thing is that you are able to express what you learned and how you grew or changed from that experience, plus how you will apply what you learned in the future.

Diversity and Inclusion: Hot topics in medicine right now, my advice is to read about diversity and inclusion in medicine and what it means-- read articles, op-eds, peer-reviewed papers, etc. There are a few ways to go about this issue; one is to find out what is unique about you that you can contribute to medicine, the second (and most important) is to work with underserved and marginalized communities. Being able to express in med school apps and interviews that you understand the difficulties faced by marginalized groups and are committed to better health and wellness outcomes is REALLY important. Being able to show awareness about diversity in medicine is so key. To do this, spend time working with the marginalized and underserved through community service and clinical work. Be able to show med schools that you understand and care about diversity and inclusion.

You should be thinking about leadership and diversity/inclusion throughout all four years of undergrad-- how will you incorporate these things into your app?

Letters of Rec

Getting letters of rec (you will need 5-6) is very important. To do this you will need to build relationships with the following…

Professors: You will need recommendations from 2 science professors and 1-2 non-science professors. To get recs you need to go to office hours, ask questions in class and outside of class, email profs questions, stay after class to ask questions, participate, show an interest in what they are teaching. Office hours are important unless the class is small. Build relationships with professors ALL THROUGHOUT undergrad. Go to office hours even if you don’t have questions, especially in junior and senior year. Go and ask them to review prior tests and papers. Ask if you can explain concepts to them to get clarification. Listen to other peoples’ questions, piggyback off them. A prof is not going to write a LOR unless they know you.

Physicians: You need to have clinical experience to get an MD LOR. And you NEED an MD or DO LOR. Get the clinical experience, then ask whatever physician you worked with the most for an LOR. Many will say you do not need a DO LOR to apply to DO schools; I cannot advocate for this as I was told by my premed advisor that I needed one. Be safe and get one if you plan to apply DO.

Other: If there is anyone else who knows you well and can write a strong LOR, ask them. Your boss, manager, volunteering organizer, team leader, club sponsor-- whomever.

Committee Letter (CL): Many med schools require these. Your college probably has a unique CL process. Go to workshops, research, and ask your advisors how this process works. Maintain a relationship with your premed advisors to obtain a good CL letter.

Building a Narrative

This is talked about a lot junior and senior year when you are applying, but it’s important to think about building your narrative all four years of undergrad.

What this means is that you want to center your application around a theme or common experiences. You want to build a cohesive resume of common volunteering, clinical, and extracurricular experiences that complement each other. You should be able to summarize all of your experiences and draw a narrative about you based on what you have done.

For example, my narrative centered around marginalized and underserved communities as well as social and restorative justice. I used my volunteering experience with marginalized, underserved kids and my experience working with traditionally underserved patients to explain why I want to be a physician, what my medical vision and mission is, and what I have learned about medicine. Because I am interested in family medicine I was able to tie my experience working with the underserved into my goal of improving community health and welfare among marginalized groups. I also discussed how my passion for social and restorative justice ties into my clinical experiences and how I plan to integrate this passion into my practice of medicine.

One of my friends centered her narrative around being a Spanish-speaking person of color AND the descendent of physicians and how this has shaped many of her experiences in medicine and healthcare.

You don’t have to plan out your experiences to conform to a pre-chosen narrative. You do have to be able to draw common themes and lessons from your experiences, however.

MCAT

Talk to your premed advisor about when to take the MCAT and what classes you need to take prior to taking the MCAT. Ideally you want to take biochem 1, physics 2, and sociology of deviance before taking the mcat along with all other prereqs.

You also want to take the MCAT before applying (ideally) so that you can craft an appropriate school list. Your MCAT will give you a boundary for which schools you can apply to. Think of the MCAT as a checkpoint you must pass to apply to certain med schools.

Many people start content review six months before their test. Some start 2-3 months prior. Do what you think is comfortable.

You can use books or purchase review courses (Kaplan, Princeton Review) or use free online review content (Khan Academy).

Practicing how to take the test is more important than content review. What that means is that doing practice tests will help you more than reviewing content. Take as many practice tests as you can (AAMC makes their own).

Do a practice test one day, review what you got wrong the next day. Repeat this enough times and you will do well on the MCAT (511+).

Don’t anticipate retaking the MCAT. But don’t exclude it as a possibility either, so plan when you take the MCAT accordingly.

General Advice:

ALWAYS listen to your premed advisors. Do not elevate advice given by random strangers (including me) on the internet above advice given by your advisors. They know you. They know your history, your transcript, your personality. Us internet people do not. Trust your advisors. They know what they are doing.

Take everything said on the internet by supposed med school app experts, med students, doctors, premeds, SDN mods and commenters, premed redditors, and other random internet people with a BIG grain of salt. We don’t always know what we are talking about.

Limit the amount of time spent on SDN and premed reddit as well as other premed online forums. It can get unhealthy real fast.

You don’t have to study all the time. It’s ok to take breaks and have fun.

Don’t be afraid to reach out and get help or ask questions. Everyone else is struggling too. Your professors want you to do well.

Do non-science related things. Give your mind a break and diversify your experience.

Failing a test is not the end of the world. Many people fail tests and classes. You won’t be alone. Always remember that the curve exists.

If you are having a problem, talk to your professors and TAs. They are there to help.

Study with people. Quiz each other. Make study guides and ask each other questions. Help each other out.

Utilize campus resources- tutoring, study groups, yoga classes, conferences and seminars, counseling, etc.

Buy the MSAR when you start building your school list. It will make comparing schools so much easier.

A B or even a C is not going to ruin your chance of getting into medical school. People get in to med schools with 3.1 GPAs. You will be ok if you fail one test, have a few Cs or Bs, withdraw from a class, etc.

Getting into med school is more about fit than anything else. It’s not about how smart you are or how good your GPA or MCAT is. Everyone has a 4.0 Everyone has a 528. What matters is fit-- who you are, what you believe, what your values are, what your aspirations are-- and how you can demonstrate these things through your application, interview, and overall experiences. Remember that top tier schools are research-oriented (Einstein, Baylor, Johns Hopkins, Harvard, Stanford, NYU, Duke, Mayo, UChicago, Mt Sinai) whereas other lower tier will be more community focused.

ALL med schools (excluding caribbean med schools and a few DO schools, looking at you DMUCOM and LECOM) are valid. All med schools are good med schools. Med school is med school is med school. You will come out with an MD or DO and you will get into residency.

Always apply DO. Just do it. DO is great, DO is a viable option and good opportunity. Do it. Do not exclude it.

Links and other Resources:

AAMC: MD applicants, helpful resources in general https://students-residents.aamc.org/preparing-medical-school/preparing-medical-school

AACOM: DO applicants https://www.aacom.org/become-a-doctor/how-to-apply-to-osteopathic-medical-college

MSAR: handbook to med schools (MD) https://students-residents.aamc.org/medical-school-admission-requirements/medical-school-admission-requirements-applicants

AAMC’s how to apply to med school https://students-residents.aamc.org/applying-medical-school/applying-medical-school

AAMC’s FAQ and tips to creating a good app: https://students-residents.aamc.org/ask-experts/ask-experts-create-winning-application

Why Diversity Matters in Healthcare https://explorehealthcareers.org/career-explorer/diversity-matters-health-care/

[foster-the-world]

Case Worker?

Does anyone else’s agency treat their case workers like children? Each of our caseworkers has deferred to their supervisor for every minor issue. Their supervisor is cc’d on 90% of emails. I asked our caseworker a question about our daycare voucher today. It was my first question and no delay on the caseworkers part, yet. Within five minutes the Supervisor had responded to say “Ms X, follow up on this.” I’d be super annoyed if I had a boss that didn’t even give me 10 minutes to do my job. However, it seems to be the norm. The caseworker asked the supervisor before letting us leave the visit when the parents are late. Even though we wait until the established time and have already established we are no longer supposed to wait more than the allotted thirty minutes. It kind of makes case workers feel pretty pointless. I guess they check the ‘a visit was done” box if something bad happens. That being said our caseworker is def not following through with the two visits a month requirement. Which is somewhat surprising considering they are virtual so it would take her max five minutes to check in and see that Baby boy is alive and well. 

In better news baby boy is very alive and very well. He’s such a dream baby. Sleeping eight hours a night. Doubled his birth weight in eight weeks. Smiling like a champ. It just doesn’t get better than him. His parents showed up this week for the first time since the first visit. When I asked if they had any family medical history the doctor should know about (per the Dr’s request) the mother told me the father has a very significant condition that can def be passed down to a baby and def would have been important information for the hospital to have when he was born. Luckily, I called his Doctor and it is a part of the routine newborn screening and he’s negative. I’m always happy when the parents show up. It’s too easy to forget he has parents when we don’t see them. The love was super apparent and I need to remember the goal is for them to get their life together so Baby boy can go home. In the meantime we are going to keep loving on him.

Meanwhile don’t ask about my three year olds. My sweet baby girls have turned into terrorist. The internet tells me 3.5 is hard. It would make sense to be a reaction to the baby but they are SO IN LOVE WITH HIM! They rush home to see him, read books to him, insist on multiple kisses a day, etc. I know three year olds can’t wax poetically about their emotional needs but I think they would at least say one negative thing about him if his arrival was causing the bad behavior. So far, it’s all love all of the time. Maybe it’s Covid life changes related? Maybe just being 3.5? Who knows? Just trying to give them lots of individual attention and respond calmly to ALL OF THE EMOTIONS ALL OF THE TIME. Fingers crossed it doesn’t last. 

Started a full course load of classes for the pre reqs for nursing school. All of the nursing programs I am applying to will accept the online courses due to Covid. I wouldn’t have chosen the online option but man does it make life easier. It’s totally self paced, I can watch and rewatch the lecture videos if I miss something, and I can do any hours I want. With baby boy still home with us it makes life so much more manageable. I’m also choosing to focus on one class at a time - still with the goal to finish all four classes (14 hours) by Jan 2021. I should be finishing up the nutrition class early next week. Man there is a lot of stuff going on in our bodies that I have zero idea about. So interesting, so far. 

From my last maternity leaves I had forgotten how annoying it is to be cleaning all day. I’m not a person who can have a lot of clutter around so I can’t get any work done until after I put stuff away. With the three of us home and the girls creating a tornado of mess as soon as they get home it’s a constant battle. Baby boys a spitter up (his one fault) so the laundry is never ending. My husband’s home and he has no problems leaving clutter around so I’m also picking up after him. Trying to balance not being a nag and making sure he’s holding up his fair share of the duties. We went through a downtime when I felt like he was really not pulling his fair share with the kiddos but we talked and worked out what works for both of us. Certainly not perfect but I’m glad he’s open to listening/changing. 

Somehow through multiple children I’ve managed to put on 25 pounds of extra weight. I don’t blame the (one) pregnancy - it’s more lack of time/energy. I’m finally getting around to working on it. I’m starting 3-4 days a week with a boot camp class (10 ft apart) in the park. With my husband working from home he can watch the baby while I’m gone. It’s so nice to start each day outside, moving, and doing something only for me. The diet is the hard part but I’m three weeks in and see some progress. Holidays and social gatherings are my problem but those are greatly reduced due to Covid. Fingers crossed I’m motivated enough to make it stick. Right now I’m focusing on losing the first ten. Once baby boy starts daycare I’ll have even more time to cook healthy meals. Cooking a meal while listening to a podcast before the kids get home from school/daycare feels like a great way to end my school day.

[diamond-song42]

Card Shark 99: You’ve Been Up All Night

Hello, my friends! Welcome back to Card Shark. Is everybody doing okay? As I mentioned in the last Shark, my life has been... tumultuous, to put it lightly. But I am still going to bring you new Shark content as we flatten the curve. Returning to my set cycling today, I’m looking at a Canterlot Nights Event that... surprisingly aged okay? Even in today’s metagame? Let’s take a look at “You’ve Been Up All Night!”

Now that I’ve watched the entirely of Friendship is Magic, I can safely say that I believe the definition of “baby dragon” has changed since the series premiere. Here we have a 4 power Event, costing 3 AT and 3 Purple req to be played during the Main Phase. Okay, fair. The concept of Immediate Events wasn’t exactly a thing until Equestrian Odysseys, so this is expected. When you play it during that Main Phase, a player’s exhausted Friend gets slapped on top of its owner’s deck! That’s... pretty much it, really! I like this as there aren’t a whole lot of cards that allow you to put Friends in play straight on top of their owner’s deck, much less either player’s deck. Meticulous allows you to preview and order cards, yes, but not directly put them into play. If there’s an opposing exhausted Friend you just don’t like - or maybe you want an exhausted Friend of yours to do something in an upcoming Faceoff - you can put them to bed with this Event. 3 AT may feel a little stiff, but considering there is no power requirement (like its Core cousin Napcakes has), this feels like an okay tradeoff. Had this card been a thing before some current sets, I wouldn’t have given it the benefit of the exhaustion requirement - you couldn’t get as much out of exhaustion cards as you can with more current cards. These days, exhausting is everywhere, which gives you a bunch of options for what to bounce onto a deck. Not to mention a bunch of newer cards like Grubber, Royal Announcer and Apple Bloom, Seedling Seeker allow you to do the exhausting yourself (you’ll see more in my suggestions later on)! For a pre-Core card - an Event, no less - this card is surprisingly versatile.

That’s not to say this Event is perfect. Despite its versatility, you’re still shelling out 3 AT and at least a flipped Purple Mane to pull it off. Generally, cards that put Friends on top of their owner’s decks aren’t the cheapest - have you seen Ocellus, Hit the Books? She can bounce any opposing Friend, but she costs 3 AT and 4 Purple req! The cards that can do this that are cheap (such as Napcakes and The Spectacle) have specific play requirements that, in a way, are almost more limiting. What I mean is that it may be easier for you to exhaust the Friend you want to top a deck with than reduce their power enough to Napcakes them. Depending on your play strategy, cost can either be a next to nonexistent problem or a major issue. In this game, every AT matters. There’s also the matter of Time Warp, which has the same cost and color req, higher printed power, and can also put Resources on top of decks. Bouncing Friends back to their owner’s deck is not an easy strategy to play! Regardless, I still think this Event could be useful in the right deck. I say if you can’t find a Time Warp or just have room in your deck for this card, go for it!

Here’s a few more cards that partied as hard as Spike:

*Fume, Breathtaking. If exhausting opposing characters is your strategy, this is one card you shouldn’t pass up. Fume does cost a lofty 4 AT, but he not only exhausts characters for each Dragon character you have in play, but blocks opponents from readying more than one of their characters each Ready Step. Ideally, you’d have multiple Dragons in play to exhaust as many opposing characters as you can. Then you’d be open to play this Event and get any of those newly-exhausted Friends out of there! It may not be something you can play early in the game, and you’d still have to watch out for Fume being dismissed, banished, or frightened to lift that readying restriction, but it can still pay off greatly for you in the end.

*Grubber, Baked Bads. But maybe you want a repetitive exhausting option instead of just one giant exhaustion. In that case, this Grubber is the Friend for you! Not only can he exhaust an opposing character when he enters play, but he can also exhaust an opposing character at the start of each of your turns. Your opponent will be backed into an exhaustion corner if they have no way of getting Grubber out of play. How about them apple pies?

*Mistmane, Pillar of Beauty. On a different note: what if you aren’t satisfied with an exhausted Friend returning to their owner’s deck? Mistmane can shake things up after you get her bonus points out of the way. By returning Mistmane to your hand and paying 2 AT, the top three cards of each player’s deck can go straight into their respective discard piles. Unless your opponent has discard retrieval options, if that exhausted Friend goes back on top of their deck and then into their discard pile, there’s a high chance they won’t get it back. Well, unless you play Mistmane again for more points and they subsequently retrieve that Friend with her effect. If anything, your opponent will be more annoyed by the end of it. And those are my favorite play strategies 😈

*Study Session. Here’s a Resource that can scare your opponent away from playing Friends that might get decked entirely! One Study Session forces all opposing Friends that are played to enter play exhausted, halting their power from being flexed (unless they have Stubborn) or activating any abilities where they would need to exhaust themselves. It’s still one of my favorite Resources, and it gives you a boatload of options for opposing Friends to bounce back to their deck if your opponent ignores its warning. Resource removal is a staple in many decks, however - make sure you have a plan if Study Session comes face to face with some Bewitched Beavers or something similar!

Thanks for reading another Card Shark! Next week is going to be special: it’s my 100th Shark! Yes, 100! I can guarantee that the Ultra Rare I cover will be something special, a card that doesn’t share one of its most notable traits with most Ultra Rares. Start making your guesses below! Diamond out!

[tyranttortoise]

Hey! So I read the ask about what you do for a living, and you said you were an X-ray Tech, which is really cool, and I’ve actually wanted to be one for a year or so now! :) I was just really curious about what courses you took for collage or university in order to actually be one, and how long you had to go to school? I’ve been having a lot of anxiety about not knowing what to do with going about university or what to take, so asking someone who actually did it seemed promising lol

Hey there!  Ha, I’ve never heard someone say they actually wanted to be an X-ray tech.  Whenever we get anyone new, I always ask why someone decided to go into the field, and it’s usually the same answers:

“Because there’s plenty of job openings.”

“Because I failed out of nursing and it used most of the same pre-reqs.”

“Because I wanted to work in healthcare, but not handle meds.”

“Because the money’s not bad.”

That said, I always recommend x-ray to my friends.  It’s a great field, right now there’s a shortage so it’s easy to find a job, there’s opportunity for travel if you’re into that, and working in healthcare is one of the best job security decisions because people will always need x-rays.  My little cousin actually just started the program because she wanted to get out on her own as soon as possible.

I went to college for three years to get it.  I took one year for my pre-requisites (counting the summer semesters, so four total semesters), and the courses I took were things like a basic Math, a basic Biology, two anatomy courses, two English courses, CPR, and some electives.  However, I know with the college I went to, they’re now trying to fast-track the program, so you don’t have to have all of that completed before you start learning x-ray.  Instead, they’ll let you take the courses alongside the x-ray courses, so it’ll only be a two years instead of three.  Because, I mean, the degree is still a two-year degree regardless; it’s an Associates in Applied Science.  

The actual x-ray courses are things like more anatomy, Patient Care, a lab where you have to prove you know what positions to use for the x-rays, Radiologic Physics, Pathology, Image Evaluation, and uh... I’m trying to remember, but I’m drawing a blank.  The first two semesters were just learning what it’s like to work in a hospital, the next two are more in-depth about what radiation is and what to look for on x-rays, and the fifth semester is purely review to get ready to take the registry to get your license.  It sounds kinda overwhelming, but the entire time you’re doing this, you’ll also be doing “clinicals” where you go to a hospital and they teach you how to do everything first-hand.  It’s where I learned everything!

Whatever college you go to should have a list of pre-reqs and guidelines for what you have to do to get into the program.  It will likely be listed as Diagnostic Imaging, so keep an eye out for that when you’re looking at colleges.  Also, Ultrasound and Nuclear Medicine are great programs as well.  I almost went with the Sleep Lab tech program, too, because it pays really well and it’s super easy.   If you get the Diagnostic Imaging degree, you can move on to MRI or CT certifications relatively easily, too.  My s/o went through the program with me, and now he does CT.  I.... uh, didn’t.  You have to start IVs to do CT, and I don’t do so great with needles lol.

[cllya]

I know it wasn’t meant for newbs, at the same time I got sick and tired of all those: just tank it. Use way of the gun, etc. I die in a single hit, two if I have mana shield on and survive as deadly. My main source of the problem was not the crit, it was the damage dealing (lacking in combat skills as I focused on life skills instead) and barely being able to survive a blow. This is written in a hurry because I just don’t want to deal with Hasidim solo ever again, or until I hit lv. 5,000.

Armor-wise I was wearing the Special Newbie Wear Type C. No enchantments. Why not gamyu at least? Because this entire thing is based on dodging and pulling.

Pre Req:

Chain blade (I used beginner’s Chain blade)

Shuriken or gun (store bought, I used shuriken)

   Skills:

* Is absolutely necessary

*Dorcha Mastery (Higher the better)

*Anchor Rush (D+)

*Chain Sweep (F+, back up dodge)

*Chain Impale (Higher the better, main source of dmg)

Divine Shield (You should already have this)

Mana Shield (Back up life)

Enduring Melody (Back up life 2)

Divine Link (Back up life 3)

Crisis Escape (Back up life 4)

Before starting quest:

Make sure Dorcha is at least 3, that’s two dodges at the very least.

Divine link a pet.

Have Chain Blade and either Shuriken or gun equipped.

Use Enduring Melody and mana shield just in case.

Hasidim Pattern:

First is the ever annoying Charge: It uses double charge and if first didn’t kill you, second will certainly summon Nao or get awful close to summoning Nao. Make sure the effects are at the highest and disable mini effects. It will have glowing shining effect on the ground before it.   How to Dodge:    Use Anchor Rush anywhere, preferably towards Hasidim. Make sure to use it twice in case it runs at you twice. This won’t be necessary when you catch it’s hind, but you also never know. Chain Sweep is also another good choice and if you are lucky may cause some damage. However don’t rely on it as it costs 2 dorcha and may backfire due to its long motion.

Swipe: It’s the normal attack. It’ll swipe it’s weapon at around 180 degrees in front. It seems to hit slightly past it’s side at times. Good ol’ Mabinogi.   How to Dodge:    For one, you shouldn’t even be in front of Hasidim if you can help it. There isn’t much warning before it happens and you just have to feel the timing like some rhythm game. Use Anchor Rush to get behind it.

Meteor: When it rains death down upon just you.    How to Dodge:     Use Divine Shield the moment it jumps it’s sassy little ass up in the air. 

Magic Missiles that Slow you Down: You can dodge it all you want, but once it hits one of the Alban Knights dealing 1 dmg, everyone get’s slowed down. Best way to deal with this is just have Anchor Rush ready with a finger on Divine Shield just in case.

Dodging and Pulling

When the quest first starts, move to the side and use Crisis Escape. If you don’t have one, just run away from your Divine Linked pet. It’ll most likely die. Undo the summon and summon your fastest pet on land. Ride it to the edge of the map, ideally towards the broken gate, away from the apostals. Keep Hasidim in view sight and continue to pull.

By the time 2 minute counter is over and ghost boi gives you magical powers, Hasidim should be well away from the Apostals. This will keep them from joining the fight and make things a lot easier. Don’t forget to keep Hasidim in view though, for the next phase.

7 crits. You can achieve this with chain blade, however I find it too slow. I used store bought shuriken to get through this phrase. Just spam attack and it’ll be over in a second. If you end up being caught and drained, just abort mission and start over.

Now Apostals will try to join in. However if you have pulled Hasidim well and away from the well area, they won’t move and join. Keep yourself from going near that area as well. This means no worrying about fireballs and lightening. Apostals will revive on death as well, so it’s better to just avoid them altogether.

Use Anchor Rush to keep behind Hasidim. Make sure Dorcha level stays above 3. Hasidim’s movements are slow so you can use Chain Crush, however I prefer Chain Impale due to it’s short motion.

Then it’s repeating dodge after dodge with keeping up divine link and divine shield now and then. It’s a good idea to keep some mp potions in the short key if using mana shield as Divine Shield requires mana. Another tip is ignore the pet’s death. If it’s dead, don’t bother reviving it or disable the link. Keep the link up for as long as possible for the buff and only summon new after Hasidim has used an attack and you are behind him out of range. Take it slow and easy, trying to cram in more attacks will result in quick death. There is plenty of time as long as you stay near it and don’t waste time reviving either self or pet.

PS- Don’t be afraid of spamming Anchor Rush. It gives you invincibility during most of it’s motion. It saves lives and potions. As such, try to keep Dorcha level 3+.

[sandersbayhq]

[Chloe Eva Lynn] ✖ [26] ✖ [bisexual] ✖ [little miss sunshine]

dob: november 1 occupation: dance instructor at st james performing arts school face claim: zoe sugg pronouns: she/her

Before Chloe came into the Lynn household, her parents desperately wanted a baby. They’ve tried for a couple years with no luck. It was after tests were done that it showed her mother, Rebecca, was unable to conceive. This news struck the young couple hard but they opened their hearts to adoption. After a couple more years of fostering children that they were blessed with a one year old little girl. Soon they legally adopted the baby and named her Chloe Eva Lynn.

Tomas and Rebecca Lynn sat with Chloe when she was ten and explained she’s adopted, the parents deciding on complete honesty with her. Of course Chloe asked questions and wanted to know who her birth parents are but since she was left in front of a church. All that was left with the little girl was a pink blanket with a baby elephant on it. The desire to learn about her parents never left but Chloe didn’t allow that to diminish her love for her real parents.

Chloe is an exuberant girl. She loves to dance, talk, sing and has tremendous love for everyone. As she grew up she made friends easily and would always throw the best parties. Everybody knew who she is but it didn’t go to her head. She just wants to make people happy.

When it comes to Chloe’s true passion, it’s dance. She loves all types but primarily enjoys ballet.  Her mother said she was fascinated by the ballerinas when they saw Swan Lake and they placed her in a class when she was 5 and it came naturally to the little girl. Her father highly encouraged this as he used to be a professional dancer turned instructor until a car accident robbed him of it. She continued to dance ballet until she was 17.

In high school Chloe had a couple relationships. At the time, her 2nd boyfriend meant the entire world to her but after her family moved from New Jersey to Houston, Texas; as her mom took a job as a Copywriter at an Advertising Agency, Chloe soon learned long distance relationships are difficult to maintain.

Chloe didn’t know anyone in Houston and since she was 18 when she moved there she took advantage of the free time and went on a mini road trip when her best friend came to visit. The pair went all over the US and it was during that trip that she and her childhood best friend hooked up. Everything seemed perfect and Chloe thought they were basically living out the plot to some romcom, but when they returned to Houston he immediately flew back to Jersey and distanced himself from her. This left Chloe both heartbroken and without her best friend.

While she tried to get a better feel for her new reality Chloe enrolled in Houston Community College and focused on her pre-reqs. It didn’t take long for Chloe to make friends in her classes and she soon spent more and more time with them than her parents; which is expected of a girl her age. Chloe’s first girlfriend was someone she met in her English class and they’d spend most of their time at her girlfriend’s apartment in Montrose. Chloe still felt hurt by what her ex best friend did but at least the more time she spent with her new friends, especially the ones her girlfriend introduced her to, the easier it was to move away from that hurt.

The relationship with her girlfriend lasted about four months but the breakup was mutual because both of them started to lose interest with each other. However Chloe took advantage of a connection she made through her ex-girlfriend and applied to be a ballet instructor at a dance academy down the street from her ex’s apartment. They made an agreement, as Chloe’s parents live over forty minutes away and Houston traffic is terrible, and Chloe moved in with her ex.

Things seemed to work with this arrangement for a year but when her ex, now roommate, started to have more and more people over; the kind of people who drank all night and openly did lines of coke in the living room, Chloe knew she needed out. The thing was Chloe didn’t have enough money to live on her own, which kept her in that apartment. It wasn’t until six months later, while she was asleep in her bed, that she woke up to a couple having sex next to her bed that she knew it was time to go.

Chloe returned to her parent’s and as much as she hated the commute she loved the job. She worked with children and teens and they never failed to make her smile. She kept with this dance academy for three more years and it was the director who shared a dance school in North Carolina needs instructors and asked if she’d have an interest. It wasn’t until Chloe learned it’s in Sander’s Bay, which mean she’d have easy access to a beach. She was in!

When Chloe moved to Sander’s Bay, a month shy of her 25th birthday, she felt as if she stepped into a whole new world. There’s a cuteness to the city that she saw in some places during that summer road trip. Something she never truly envisioned herself living in but it simply fell into place once she unpacked her things in her small home. Chloe decorated the house in bright colors and it didn’t take long for her to adopt a puppy and kitten, something she’s always wanted to do. And if any neighbors happen by her house they might catch a glimpse of her dancing around the living room and kitchen to 80s pop music.

Chloe has a place to herself she has no trouble finding someone to keep her bed warm; without knowing her ex is in the other room and probably judging everyone who Chloe brought into the apartment. Chloe feels people should enjoy sex and have it as often as possible. And now that she’s in a place where she’s completely comfortable in her home she does just that.

If anyone wants to find her they can either look towards the dance school, beach, or the cute cafe that serves her favorite nonfat lavender latte and vanilla biscotti. And, at least once a week, she’ll treat herself to a Chloe day where she goes to a spa and ends it out with a nice dinner and whatever is showing at the local movie theater.

Chloe remains very close with her parents and tries to spend as much time catching up with calls or Facetime sessions.

Chloe hopes her upbeat personality and cheerful demeanor brightens the day for anyone who she happens across. That even though she may have her own rough days, Chloe looks for that happy thing, that one thing to focus on that can turn the day around. Even just a little bit.

Three months ago Chloe received word her father was in a horrific car accident. Tomas been in one many years before, which caused such injury he was unable to teach dance anymore. The current accident left him bed ridden and Chloe dropped everything to help her mother care for him. It was a trying time for their little family and Chloe didn’t want to leave but her parents encouraged her to return to Sander’s Bay. As that’s where her life is.

As she readied herself to return, the short-term lease with still 4 months to go with the tenant in her house, Chloe found out her cousin Hannah was still there. Which was great because she missed her and really wanted to catch up with everything. However Chloe wasn’t super thrilled about practically being homeless with her two pets but that’s what adventures are all about! She’ll find a place for the next 4 months and make the most of it!

[ninanursing]

my story.

I figured that I should have started off with how I got to nursing school as my first post, but whatever it’s okay. So yeah here it goes---

Since I was a little girl, maybe 5 or 7 years old, I can’t recall exactly, I already knew I wanted to be in the medical field. At first I wanted to be a doctor, but found out that it was going to take a long time so I was like never mind, I’ll do something else (LOL). Somehow, nursing came into mind and from that time on, nursing was what I wanted to do. Growing up, I’ve had difficulties in school. I wasn’t the brightest student. I did all of my work, but understanding the concepts was hard for me to grasp esp math & science. In high school when it came to applying for colleges, I wanted to go to Sac State to pursue nursing. I did make it into Sac State, but nursing didn’t happen. I struggled with all of my science classes. I did however, graduate with a BS in Gerontology (study of aging) in May 2017. I still had other pre-reqs I needed to take after, such as stats and micro (which I took at the junior colleges). I took anatomy & physiology, but I wasn’t content with those grades so I retook them. And chem, boy that class was a nightmare. During those times at Sac State/junior colleges, I would be asked if nursing was what I really wanted. To be truthfully honest, it gave me anxiety & I felt like I lost hope. I wasn’t sure if I was just saying “nursing” because that became a normal response or if I really wanted it badly. I knew that having just a degree in Gero couldn’t really get me far. 

But I was more scared about not fulfilling the goal I set for myself. I didn’t know what to do. My GPA wasn’t even high enough for me to apply. Everyone around me that I knew (who were also wanting to pursue nursing) were getting into the programs. I was stressed out even more because for one, I felt super behind and two I’m stuck in the same place. 

The worst part that I did to myself was compare where I was to everyone (those getting into nursing school) around me. They believed in me, on the other hand, I had little to no-beliefs in myself. One day (can’t even recall when this occurred),I took the initiative to contact nursing schools. I mean what's the worse that could happen right? It was scary for me because I was scared that I was going to be let down. And I was stressed about what their responses might be. The positive side to this was knowing I’d get my questions answered. I emailed nursing schools in CA. I went to talk to the Sacramento Chamberlain campus, but instead I decided to try and contact the Las Vegas campus (after talking to the Sac campus about my grades). I emailed the advisor I from Chamberlain University, Las Vegas who then gave me some form of hope. She said my GPA was eligible for me to get in and & suggested that I apply since spots were filling up. Around maybe September or October 2019, I finally submitted my application, took the HESI, and I got an email saying I was academically eligible for that campus. From that point on, I’ve gotten emails about the campus & getting financial aid. At this point, I still didn’t want to say it loud to anyone because I was scared of jinxing it. I only told a handful of people. 

Fast forward to December 4, 2019, I did my pre-enrollment and got my acceptance letter. I really couldn’t believe it. *Going off topic for a quick minute*  This was also the day my bf & I celebrated our 3 year anniversary. He surprised me with a Tiffany & Co. infinity necklace b/c he remembered that I told myself that if I ever got into nursing school that I’d buy myself that necklace (I really that I said that, but he somehow remembered). 

One of This was the only nursing school I applied to and  was accepted. This journey was not easy for me at all. I was stressed out had anxiety, and had so much negative thoughts. To add on, my advisors changed a lot during the application process. It was bit rough, but managed to pull through. Honestly, all along I needed to trust in God’s Plan (Jeremiah 29:11). 

I wanted to go to school in California, but at that point, it was not even a choice for me because of how strongly competitive it is. I decided to go out of state. It is nice because I’m in a new environment. I do miss home a lot, but I’ll be back in no time. I just need to tell myself that if I can get through that time when I was overly stressed and anxious, I can survive nursing school.

*I’ll probably edit this later on

[chicleeblair]

Dear Yuletide Writer

Dear Yuletide Author,

EDIT: I am not able to participate in Yuletide this year--I had to forfeit in 2016 due to being unexpectedly hospitalized in Nov/Dec after poorly managing my time, and misreading the rules--I thought the ban could be cleared by submitting a treat OR waiting a year, turns out I have to complete a finished story to be cleared, which I will this year.

All that said, I spent quite a bit of time on this and since I could manage to pinch hint and get to make my requests I’m going to leave my DYW letter here. If anyone feels like writing to these prompts, feel free. I’ll probably reuse them last year, depending on what is written for other people, but I already have plans to nominate a few newer fandoms next year.

Fandoms included: Newsflesh (incl Feedback), 

Hi! I’m incredibly excited about Yuletide this year, and I’ve been considering my requests and offers with more thought than I should be willing to admit to this week. There are so many fandoms that I love nominated, and though I’ve learned to be careful about what I offer to write for, I’ve still found myself making detailed mentao pro-con lists, especially since I try not to request fic from the same fandoms I offer to write in. Still, I’ve been surprised by some of the nominations—I only finished The Lonliest Girl in the Universe a week ago, and Lauren James isn’t well-known in the States, despite being one of my favorite authors. Anyway, I think I’ve got my lists figured out now, so the time has come to tell you what it is I love about my favorite pieces of underappreciated media. What an easy project /sarcasm.

 DISLIKES Before I get into the fandoms individually, I suppose I should let you know what my squicks are (you know you’ve been in fandom too long when you’re shocked Word doesn’t recognize the word ‘squicks.) None of these are triggers in particular, I’ve got depression, but it’s managed, and I don’t have any major traumas to worry about in particular. I don’t mine NSFW/explicit fic, but it’s also not often my reason for reading. That said, the following tags make me likely to hit the back button: watersports, alpha/omega, knotting, feces, mpreg. I’m not particularly fond of girl!penis as a kink, though it’s different if the character is actually dealing with being trans or intersex.

 LIKES One thing I do like that a lot of people don’t is bloodplay, though as there aren’t any vampire stories in my requests it probably won’t be a Thing this year, and I’m good with consensual BDSM.

 I’m sure it’s obvious from my reqs that I’m into zombie fiction, though it’s the human side of it I like, whether that’s humans dealing with zombies, or zombies attempting to deal with their humanity. One thing I will say is that I’ve chosen fandoms that all rest on detailed world-building, and if you want to write a fic that explores the edges of these universes without necessarily including the listed characters, I’m happy with that. Anything that explores how the world has changed/how a certain person has been affected by the big change is fine with me!

 I’m bi, with a deeply abiding love for f/f fic. I definitely have het ships that I’ll fill you in on, but I still love stories where those ladies interact with their female friends. I’m very pro kid!fic, I adore time stamps, alternate POVs, epistolary fic, social media fic, anything that explores the world that an author has already built. I wasn’t ever the kid simply rubbing their Barbies together, I acted out Barbie and Ken meeting while they babysat Kelly and Tommy. (True story: these stories were also written down in a notebook I carried around at school. Basically, I started writing Barbie fanfic at the age of eight.)  

 I’ve received some great Yuletide gifts via letters where I’ve spelled out specific desires, but this year I don’t have specific stories I want written so much as worlds I’d like to see explored further. What are they? Glad you asked, friend!

 Newsflesh (Feed, Deadline, Blackout, Rise, & Feedback)

 This isn’t the most obscure fandom in the world, by any means, since it’s written by Seanann McGuiare under her Mira Grant penname, and because Mark Oshiro of Mark Does Stuff chronicled his journey through the original trilogy. That said, I’m pretty obsessed with the world of these books, and have read and reread all the books and novellas, and I’m not as into the main ship as most readers seem to be. I’m adopted, so the relationship between Georgia and Shaun I don’t love incest in general, though a high school obsession with Life with Derek means I can’t cast stones. However, I nominated this fandom in the first place, and I picked the character pool especially so that even if I didn’t end up requesting it, other participants might take the chance to explore other characters, specifically the characters introduced in Feedback. Their story takes place parallel to Feed; while the Masons are covering the Ryman campaign, Aislinn North, the Irwin who adores chasing zombies, and her companions are on the election trail with Senator Shannon Kilbourne. I like Feedback due to the diversity of its cast—Mat, the teams’ techie and makeup blogger, is nonbinary, and Ash is married to Ben, the Newsie, on paper, but really in a relationship with the final member of their team, fiction-writer Audrey). But another feature I love about this book? Unlike the original trilogy, it was written after the date when Grant sets the Rising—July 2014. Because of this, the book contains some amazing pop cultural nuggets that just make the whole thing seem more real, for instance Ash mentions that Frozen merchandise is a rarity, since the Rising happened mid-PR campaign, and Taylor Swift’s pre-2013 music is “before she turned political.” (If only. Tay and JLaw disappointed me last year.) Like I said, I’m not married to you using these characters. Heck, if you want to explore Taylor Swift’s life, post-Rising, that’d be cool with me. That said, I chose Ash, Emily Ryman, Maggie, and Georgia because they are awesome female characters, and I’d love to see them interact. I can see Ash and Maggie having known each other/dated at some point—though post-canon I am pro-Maggie/Alaric, though less crazy about Ash’s girlfriend—and any situation where they could meet would make a great fic, especially if both Georgia and Ash have to deal with their prejudices towards each other. Also, in regards to Maggie, I wouldn’t mind knowing more about Alisa, Alaric’s sister, especially because the Masons take her in from a shelter in Ferry Pass, which is part of my hometown of Pensacola. Emily is painfully underused, being born pre-Rising and developing retinal KA, and all of them are just badasses. Basically, this world is awesome and I think more people need to be exposed to Feedback, and it’s Irish spitfire of a POV-Irwin. Another feature of this universe I’m interested in is the kids who grow up post-Rising. Grant looks into this with blog posts and flashbacks, but even the description of the post-Rising orphanages in the “All the Pretty Little Horses” short story from Rise makes me want more.

 Parasitology Parasite, Symbiont, Chimera

 Another Mira Grant, another apocalypse. People have accused her of revamping the same story again, but in spite of having some similar characters and circumstances Sal’s story is nothing like Georgia or Ash’s. Of course, I adore the similarities in story-telling—ephemera is my kryptonite—but Sal’s development is unique to Mira Grant books, if not to books in general, and her relationship to her own humanity/lack thereof is fascinating. I especially love that she spends the whole series in a committed relationship, one that she is confident of, and that in spite of only technically having existed for six years she is incredibly sure of herself. I nominated this one as well, and chose Sal, Juniper, Doctor Cale, and Tansy because they are strong ladies with complex stories that have lots of room to be explored. Dr. Cale, Tansy, and Sal to a degree, deal with disability—and this is particular interesting for Tansy & Sal, since they are aware of the fact that they are making a choice to keep this malfunctioning human body. Juniper is a little girl, yet she and Tansy are learning to be people together, Sal is learning to be a mother, and in a way so is Dr. Cale. Also, eventually Juniper will have to decide whether or not to engage with the humans of her generation, and that could be fascinating. That said, Grant hasn’t told nearly as many stories in this universe, since the trilogy relies far more on Sal herself than Newsflesh relies on the Masons, so I’d love to see an exploration of how the parasites and chimeras affected other parts of the world. I think the fact that the symbiotes have brought humanity so close to eradicating illness is something that could be explored further, too, especially when you consider that the parasites disabled their inventor, and that if the Mitchells hadn’t been attempting to hide Sally’s epilepsy, Sal might not have been born. There’s also the fact that the other doctor who is close to Sal—Cale’s son, Nathan—does not use the implants at all, suggesting that at their core physicians with their hearts in the right place know that there is a line that shouldn’t be crossed, that maybe humans need illness and disability to thrive.

 In the Flesh

I really debated requesting this, since it’s a fandom I think I could write in, but I liked the idea of letting my requests adhere to a theme, and this series was the first piece of zombie media I ever consumed (pun intended). There have been many great fics in this fandom, they are often AU and revolve around Kieren’s relationships—I’m all for people celebrating canonically queer characters, but to me neither of those ships were what drew me into the series. I didn’t nominate ItF myself, and I wish I had because I would have included Amy Dyer. As it is, I don’t mind if you mention either of Kieren’s relationships, but I only asked for Kieren and Jem because they’re the characters I care most about, truly. Honestly, I actually care the most about Jem, because I think she’s an incredible character who went through so much to protect her family and is forced to face her fears every day in order to have a relationship with the brother who made her who she is—in so many ways. I am also fascinated by the idea of a world that has faced the apocalypse and is having to move forward. The little details that serve to remind us that society had to hit the pause button, such as the lack of cell phones, are really intriguing to me, as well as the issues students like Jem face having to return to school after war. This world also opens the door for an exploration of what life might be like for children&teens who came back—Henry was a missed opportunity IMO—and while I don’t mind if you don’t bother incorporating the storylines Dominic Mitchell has said he would include in a season three, the idea of Jem making a friend with PDS (as opposed to PTSD, that acronym similarity needs mentioning) would be so great. Again, though, feel free to take this world and run with it, no need to stay in Roarton—I wonder what adulthood for Jem would be like, with Kieren never having aged, for instance?

 World War Z

Another of my nominations. I don’t know why, but I am obsessed with this book, specifically the audiobook. Max Brooks has talked about how he based this book on an oral history of WWII, and I think the parallels between the two wars are deep if you look closely—the idea of total war, the amount of work on the home-front, the inefficiency of assuming what won against one enemy will suffice against another, children escaping unimaginable violence, the nuclear bomb survivor, so much more—but what I really loved is how Brooks really fills in the details from each POV he uses. Without naming celebrities, Brooks clearly sets it in the Bush-era, which is interesting to me but probably not affect fic, but shows how well the world is crafted. The imagery that comes from the Australian astronaut who spent the war on the ISS is particularly poignant to me, especially the way he describes them discovering the burrowing zombies. I also get chills from Jessica’s story, the girl whose parents dragged her up to Canada, and when she discovers the Spongebob sleepover, because it’s a mark of how bizarre our culture and entertainment would seem, and how our comforts could disappear in the blink of an eye. I do think that this book is lacking in female POVs, particular ladies who might not be soldiers but were fighting the war in their own way. I loved Joe Mohammad’s POV, too, but not everyone would need to be part of a patrol group or militia to survive. I’d love to see what the situation was like for city-dwellers, or people who were in the areas not getting supplies due to the Reddecker plan. What about the Israelis, what was it like in the country during this isolated period? There have been some great fics exploring issues like euthanasia and abortion in that period, and I’d love to see an issue like that expanded. On the other hand, there is a lot that could come from looking into the world post-war, describing what the Narrator goes through to get these stories, or what kinds of stories he might hear after the initial book is published—a history of the rebuilding would be interesting since in this world the threat isn’t completely gone. Brooks has written two short stories that are explicitly in this world (a couple that are borderline) and one of them, Closure LtD, and I don’t want to spoil it, but it really makes me wonder what other kinds of industries would emerge in a post-zombie war world.

 Inhuman Condition

Also my nomination, this is a webseries that did not get NEARLY the amount of viewers or fans it deserved. The author has created this incredibly interesting alternative history, and I don’t think everyone who watched even knows how much detail was put into it. For instance, I discovered a blog (https://angrydeadgirl.wordpress.com) written from the POV of Clara—my favorite character—wherein she analyzes TV shows such as Grey’s Anatomy, except it’s Grey’s Anatomy reimagined through the lens of this world, and there is NOTHING I love more than inter-textual references like that. There are other in-universe shows that I have honestly begged to see for real, and via the show we only get a taste of these details. I’d also love to know more about how the existence of zombies and lycans affected history aside from the terror attacks we know of from the series. I’d also love to see more about Kessler, what got her into working with other-humans, whether there is a personal connection that we’re not told, more about her daughter, Mira, who has grown up in a world where the truth is known, there’s so much in there to mine. I didn’t nominate Tamar, the character who seems more superhero than supernatural, because to me her story seems to fit into this world less than Clara and Linc. Not that I don’t like her, I did, but while I totally believe they could all exist in one universe—I read Marvel, after all—her condition doesn’t seem to be in the same category, so the backstory would be different. Lycanthropy and Clara’s form of zombiism both seem to be medical conditions, to a degree, and while Tamar’s issues definitely parallel mental illness, it’s a different issue. I wouldn’t mind seeing her or others like her, just that I think the dynamics of lycan/walker-type conditions. I really appreciate how, like In the Flesh, this series allows the conditions to be a metaphor for real life issues, without erasing those issues. One of Clara’s blog entries, for instance, mentions that there are cases of people being killed for not informing sexual partners of their condition, and this is explicitly related to people with HIV who have faced similar violence. Also, Linc and Kessler are both explicitly bisexual, and in my mind Clara is non-straight, too, and that’s a reason I included Mira because WHY NOT? I nominated Frank because after seeing a fic that shipped him and Clara I got interested in what it would be like to have to spend all your time with this vibrant girl who is so afraid of becoming a monster, I don’t ship them necessarily, but I am interested in knowing more about him. This is the one fandom where I am kind of tied to having the canon characters front and center, but if you want to explore this world through a different lens, I’m open to it.

 The Loneliest Girl in the Universe

 I really, really thought about using this slot for iZombie, because it’s one of my favorite things and fits the theme, but I read The Loneliest Girl in the Universe a few weeks ago, and am THRILLED with the idea of finding other people who love it. I also considered offering to write for it, but I do not have confidence in my ability to calculate transmission delays or describe space physics. I mean, it’s basically a YA version of The Martian featuring an MC with anxiety who writes fanfic. WHAT MORE DO ANY OF US WANT? Throughout this book I was terrified that J would turn out to be an AI, but his actual backstory basically broke my heart, as did the reveal of Romy’s history. I really wish her mother had survived, and I would like to see more of her in Romy’s memories or maybe in the logs/archives now that Romy might be open to looking into them. I would love to see her asking Molly about them, or reading/watching her parents’ reports or journals as she builds a new world with Issac. I also want to know about Issac Evans. Who is he? What happened with him and J? Will he and Romy be MFEO, or simply besties who raise babies? What are the other adults on the ship like? Does Romy find a different person to love? Is it a girl? I’d also LOVE LOVE LOVE to see Romy’s life from the POV of an Earth dweller. You see, DYW, I am a huge fan of several family vlogs; there are babies I have watched grow up via the internet, and I am DEEPLY invested in their lives. NASA would be crazy not to have gotten the world to rally around baby Romy, and some of them probably still read her fics. That’s the thing, though, this book includes her fic, and imaging fic from 2067 makes me want to see more of their social media, and to know how it affected this next group of astronauts. Also, since it turns out that J lied about the war and the collapse of the world’s governments, I’d love to see what the world is actually like. What else is NASA doing? Does the entire world freak out when they find out what happened with Romy and J, or only Molly? Who is Molly? Did she suspect J based on how well she knows Romy? I have a need to know.

 That is it, oh Yuletide Author, way too many of my thoughts about Alternate Worlds, most of them infested by the undead. As I’ve said, I would be happy with stories that feature the characters I requested, or that don’t at all, but unless mentioned I’m not crazy about canon-alternatives.

[hagiographically]

Could you talk more about Stanford stereotypes regarding literally anything (idk majors?) bc they way how you explain them is literally so funny/good

lmao aw ily, you can always come to me if u want my opinion related to anything stanford (stereotypes about dorms, sports teams, greek life, a cappella ??) because i have A Lot Of It - i only wish i was more integrated with the school cuz most of my opinions are hearsay instead of personal experience

major stereotypes….hmm thats hard cuz there are So Many majors but i can just go with the most common ones and group some together, etc

engineering:

aero/astro - small department full of space nerds, most of them are in SSI, drones, i personally consider them very brainy and if i were better at engineering i would be aero/astro cuz i think it’s the next frontier. there should definitely be more women in it for sure

bioe - my ex was bioe, they’re a bunch of nerds but they have good enough hearts. they care about curing diseases and shit

CS - oh boy. ohhhhhh boy. here we fuckin go. honestly CS is barely even a sterotype at stanford cuz its such a dominant culture…..the people who decide what stereotypes even are, are probably CS. it’s gotten to the point where if i meet someone and they aren’t CS it’s worth noting. it’s gotten to the point where, in my psych/literature/communications/education classes, i expect the other people to be CS. i have so many Opinions on CS Boys because CS Boys are such!!!!a!!!type!!!! (and different from just, a boy who does CS). they worship the trinity of google, facebook, and microsoft. their junior summer internship is at least one of these. they buy into all silicon valley startup culture and they love elon musk and talk about venture capital when its really not welcome. they love talking about how much work they have and how little they sleep. all INTJs. probably virgos. there is also a subgenre of CS boy who didnt come into stanford wanting to do CS and ended up switching because its easier to be a CS Boy at stanford. they criticize the culture all the time. to this you can say, “it’s all right, craig, i know you just want to make money.”

CME - people major in this when they dont love themselves

design - i personally think this major is fuckin cool and considered it before i realized physics was a pre-req. the d school is thought to be d for douchey though because their whole shtick is so ~ideate~ ~prototype~ ~We Are Quirky and Put Post-Its On Walls~ but i dug it as a frosh. they can be kinda condescending, but theyre by far the most interdisciplinary dept in the engineering major (although its also full of white men who think theyre hot shit cuz they can use photoshop)

EE - again for people who lack self love, its supposed to be so fuckin hard

MS&E - white frat boys who glorify jordan belfort

ME - similar to design. live at the PRL. stay up till ungodly hours carving wood. somehow this is enjoyable. also white male heavy

who knows how the f to categorize this:

education - if i could do stanford over i would major in this. usually very diverse, woke, often come from underprivileged backgrounds so they want to make it better for other people and reach communities that arent currently benefited (unlike silicon valley or wall street :) ) i respect them because they do what they love and not to make $ although if educational engineering were a thing im certain people would jump ship. it’s also not in the humanities dept so i feel like theyre Above the stanford hegemony and i love that

earthsys - i considered a minor in this. usually sweet, earth-friendly people. white but woke. possibly queer. granola loving hippies and maybe some frathletes who want an “easy” major but not sure (im not shitting on easy majors. i have one. love ‘em)

generally i like girls in any of the engineering depts because they are dealing with sexism and doing it. the boys are oftentimes extremely self-congratulatory and will usually say something dumb about the humanities. even the girls will hit you with the “oh i wish i could study that!” about any non-engineering discipline, and it’s implied that what they’re really saying is “but i care about my future too much!” 

humanities/sciences:

AAAS/chicanx studies/asian-american studies/CSRE - woke poc who use lots of buzzwords and say things like folx

art - the people who major in art are usually more quiet than you’d think. we have an Artsy Type at stanf that are kind of extra (theta chi/EBF types, also very woke QPOC) but i dont think theyre art majors for the most part. i barely know any actual art Majors. lots of engineers just do art on the side

bio - i love bio majors because they are sciency but also get shit on by engineers so we’re in solidarity. they are sweet and study all the time and just wanna make the world a better place. there’s also the pre-med kind of bio who i would hate if i were also pre med but since im not i just kind of admire and fear them

chem - i like chem people much more than i thought i would. again a very small major and they just live in lab and have varied non chem interests. this year i accidentally became friends with like 6 people from the chem fraternity and i was surprised how much i liked them

complit/english - i was this major! english in creative writing are usually chill, interesting people. complit and english in literature…….it’s a shakespeare circlejerk and they hit you with the Discourse. overly educated white people. avoid the boys specifically but the girls can also be incredibly self-satisfied. maybe 50/50. but if you take a creative writing class instead of a lit class, the CW kids are usually awesome

taps - our drama department. they’re nice, but extra and intimidating. (also stanford theater is…..okay….not really as good as they seem to think it is yikes that was mean but) however, like with english, take an introductory class and you’ll meet very cool non-taps majors.

econ - oftentimes wonderful people! outside of class that is

femgen - same people as the AAAS/CSRE crowd except whiter. queer girls with undercuts. upperclassmen are intimidating to many. everyone shares their opinion even when its not warranted. my honors is in this

film studies - this was almost my minor and if i werent CW i might have doubled in film and comm! i dont know any film majors but if they arent a cole sprouse im sure theyre fine (they are probably a cole sprouse)

german/italian/french/spanish language or studies - spot the person who studied abroad!

history - like english, can be cool, more likely pretentious

humbio - the other premeds! actually humbio gets shit on alllll the time for being easy or having a fluff major, bio majors think they’re soft. thus, i like them. their course catalog is awesome and its a huge major but all the scary pre meds are straight up bio and humbios are softer but in a good way its a lot of sweet girls

intl relations - one of my favorite majors. usually very down to earth, the best of the IR/poli-sci/pub-po trinity. however, they can also be self-congratulatory for being So Woke and also they love to educate you when You Didn’t Ask

linguistics - weird, diverse people. very small major. similar to anthro, my old major. i love small majors they always have cute dinners together

MCS - a hard fuckin major. not as “Look How Smart I Am” as a bad CS. mostly quiet and stay in and study their ass off

math - love to wax poetic about the beauty of math. fun when drunk. not when sober

philosophy/MTL/classics - avoid. classics can be okay if it overlaps with archaeology because theyre just a bunch of nerds and they get really excited and its cute. phil majors would rather just educate you about how free will is fake and youre like tim can you please just get out of the way we’re in the dining hall and you’re blocking the cornbread

physics - Avoid. they think all other sciences are lesser. women and POC are ok

poli-sci - hit or miss. generally pretty friendly. very talkative. fun to talk to about Not Politics

psych - the best major hehe. generally liberal and woke and often queer. however, non-psych people in psych classes can be a nightmare (unlike english, taps, etc) and problematic as fuck. also sometimes psych majors are extra (exhibit a: me)

pub policy - probably in student government. im biased against it, but go in with hesitation. student government is by and large not as effective as they seem to think (however, a “woke” person in pub po might be cool because they will campaign for sexual assault awareness and economic diversity and good stuff)

STS - ohhhhh man. probably the major that gets most shit on at stanford. i think engineers think it’s fake. (humbio, design, and STS get shit on the most i’d say, because they are interdisciplinary STEM majors, so engineers think that they’re for people who arent smart enough to do hard majors. whereas with english or IR, engineers know they couldnt do it because they havent written an essay since 2009, so they offer grudging respect) a frathlete major. i personally like it because i dig interdisciplinary shit, but i don’t dig frat boys or athletes so i avoid. some of their courses are great but it does seem kind of scrapped together as a major and i dont know how people outside of stan see it

sociology - a small major, seems cool. stigmatized but not by stanford because stanford students dont know it exists. “dont you mean psychology?” no

urban studies - skaters? who knows. i respect them tho. i think they care about….like….architecture? and city development? its a very niche thing and i feel like it’s pretty hip n happening

[tak4hir0]

Ivano Guerini is a Salesforce Senior Developer at Webresults, part of Engineering Group since 2015. He started my career on Salesforce during his university studies and based his final thesis on it. He’s passionate about technology and development, in his spare time he enjoys developing applications mainly on Node.js. In this article, I’m going to walk you through the steps to set up CI with Salesforce DX. For this, I decided to take advantage of Bitbucket and it’s integrated tool Bitbucket Pipelines. This choice is not made after a comparison between the various version control systems and CI tools but is driven by some business needs for which we decided to fully embrace the cloud solutions and in particular the Atlassian suite of which Bitbucket its part. What is Continuous Integration? In software engineering, continuous integration (often abbreviated to CI) is a practice that is applied in contexts in which software development takes place through a versioning system. It consists of frequent alignment from the work environments of the developers to the shared environment. In particular, it is generally assumed that automatic tests have been prepared that developers can execute immediately before releasing their contributions to the shared environment, so as to ensure that the changes do not introduce errors into the existing software. Let’s apply this concept to our Salesforce development process using sfdx. First of all, we have a production org where we want to deploy and maintain the application than typically we have one or more sandboxes such as for UAT, Integration Test and development. With sfdx, we also have the concept of scratch org, disposable and preconfigured organizations where we, as developers, can deploy and test our work before pushing them into the deployment process. In the image below you can see an approach to the CI with Salesforce DX. Once a developer have finished a feature he can push into the main Developer branch, from this the CI take place creating a scratch Org to run automated tests, such as Apex Unit Test or even Selenium like test automatisms. If there is no error the dev can create a pull request moving forward in the deployment process. In this article, I’ll show you how to set up all the required tools and as an example, we will only set up an auto-deploy to our Salesforce org on every git push operation. Toolbox Let’s start with a brief description of the tools we’re going to use: Git – is a version control system for tracking changes in files and coordinating work on those files across the team. All metadata items, whether modified on the server or locally, are tracked via GIT. This provides us with a version history as well as traceability.Bitbucket – is a cloud-based GIT server from Atlassian used for hosting our repository. It provides a UI to navigate the GIT repository and has many additional features like pull requests. These are used for approving and merging changes.Docker – provides a way to run applications securely, packaged with all its dependencies and libraries. So, we will be using it to create an environment for running sfdx commands.Bitbucket Pipelines – is an add-on for Bitbucket cloud that will allow us to kick off deployments and validations when updates are made to the branches in Bitbucket. If you have always worked in Salesforce, then it’s quite possible that Docker containers sound alien to you. So what is Docker? In simple terms, Docker can be thought of as a virtual machine in the cloud. Docker provides an environment in the cloud where applications can run. Bitbucket Pipelines support Docker images for running the Continuous Integration scripts. So, instead of installing sfdx in your local system, you’d now specify them to be installed in your Docker image, so that our CI scripts can run. Create a developer Org and enable the DevHub We made a brief introduction about what CI is and the tools we’re going to use, now it’s time to get to the heart of it and start configuring our tools. Starting from our Salesforce Org. We are going to enable the devhub to be able to work with sfdx and we are going to set up a connected app that allows us to handle the login process inside our docker container. For this article, I created a dedicated developer Org in order to have a clean environment. We can do this simply filling out the form from the Salesforce site: https://developer.salesforce.com/signup and complete the registration process. In this way, we will obtain a new environment on which to perform all the tests we want. Let’s go immediately to enable the DevHub: Setup → Development → DevHub click on the Enable DevHub toggle. Once enabled it can’t be disabled but this is a requirement to be able to work with SFDX. Now you can install the sfdx cli tool on you computer. Create a connected app Now that we have our new org and the sfdx cli installed, we can run sfdx commands that makes it easy for us to manage the entire application development life cycle from the command line, including creating scripts that facilitate automation. However, our CI will run in a separate environment where we haven’t a direct control, such as for the logging. So we will need a way to manage the authorization process inside the docker container when your CI automation job runs. To do this we’ll use the OAuth JSON Web Token (JWT) bearer flow that’s supported in the Salesforce CLI, this OAuth flow gives you the ability to authenticate using the CLI without having to interactively login. This headless flow is perfect for automated builds and scripting. Create a Self-Signed SSL Certificate and Private Key For a CI solution to work, you’ll generate a private key for signing the JWT bearer token payload, and you’ll create a connected app in the Dev Hub org that contains a certificate generated from that private key. To create an SSL certificate you need a private key and a certificate signing request. You can generate these files using OpenSSL CLI with a few simple commands. If you use Unix Based System, you can install the OpenSSL CLI from the official OpenSSL website. If you use Windows instead, you can download an installer from Shining Light Productions, although there are plenty of alternatives. We will follow some specific command to create a certificate for our needs, if you want to better understand how OpenSSL works, you can find a handy guide in this article. If you are not familiar with OpenSSL you can find a good Create a folder on your PC to store the generated files mkdir certificatesGenerate an RSA private key -out server.pass.key 2048Create a key file from the server.pass.key file using the same password from before: -in server.pass.key -out server.keyDelete the server.pass.key: rm server.pass.keyRequest and generate the certificate, when prompted for the challenge password press enter to skip the step: openssl req -new -key server.key -out server.csrGenerate the SSL certificate: openssl x509 -req -sha256 -days 365 -in server.csr -signkey server.key -out server.crt The self-signed SSL certificate is generated from the server.key private key and server.csr files. Create the Connected App The next step is to create a connected app on Salesforce that includes the certificate we just created. From Setup, enter App Manager in the Quick Find box, then select App Manager.Click New Connected App.Enter the connected app name and your email address:Connected App Name: sfdx ci Select Enable OAuth Settings.Enter the callback URL:http://localhost:1717/OauthRedirectSelect Use digital signatures.To upload your server.crt file, click Choose File.For OAuth scopes, add:Access and manage your data (api)Perform requests on your behalf at any time (refresh_token, offline_access)Provide access to your data via the Web (web) Click Save Edit Policies to avoid authorization step After you’ve saved your connected app, edit the policies to enable the connected app to circumvent the manual login process. Click Manage.Click Edit Policies.In the OAuth policies section, for Permitted Users select Admin approved users are pre-authorized, then click OK. Click Save. Create a Permission Set Lastly, create a permission set and assign pre-authorized users for this connected app. From Setup, enter Permission in the Quick Find box, then select Permission Sets.Click New.For the Label, enter: sfdx ciClick Save.Click sfdx ci | Manage Assignments | Add Assignments.Select the checkbox next to your Dev Hub username, then click Assign | Done.Go back to your connected app.From Setup, enter App Manager in the Quick Find box, then select App Manager.Next to sfdx ci, click the list item drop-down arrow (), then select Manage.In the Permission Sets section, click Manage Permission Sets.Select the checkbox next to sfdx ci, then click Save. Test the JWT Auth Flow Open your Dev Hub org. If you already authorized the Dev Hub, open it: sfdx force:org:open -u DevHub If you haven’t yet logged in to your Dev Hub org: sfdx force:auth:web:login -d -a DevHub Adding the -d flag sets this org as the default Dev Hub. To set an alias for the org, use the -a flag with an argument to set an alias. To test the JWT auth flow you’ll use some of the information that we asked you to save previously. We’ll use the consumer key that was generated when you created the connected app (CONSUMER_KEY), the absolute path to the location where you generated your OpenSSL server.key file (JWT_KEY_FILE) and the username for the Dev Hub (HUB_USERNAME). On the command line, create these three session-based environment variables: These environment variables facilitate running the JWT auth command. Enter the following command as-is on a single line: sfdx force:auth:jwt:grant –clientid ${CONSUMER_KEY} –username ${HUB_USERNAME} \ –jwtkeyfile ${JWT_KEY_FILE} –setdefaultdevhubusername This command logs in to the Dev Hub using only the consumer key (client ID), the username, and the JWT key file. And best of all, it doesn’t require you to interactively log in, which is important when you want your scripts to run automatically. Congratulations, you’ve created your connected app and you are able to login using it with the SFDX CLI. Set up your development environment In this section we will configure our local environment, creating a remote repository in Bitbucket and linking it to our local sfdx project folder. If you are already familiar with these steps you can skip and pass directly to the next section. Create a Git Repository on Bitbucket If you don’t have a bitbucket account, you can create a free one registering to the following link: https://bitbucket.org/account/signup/ Just insert your email and follow the first registration procedure. Once logged in you will be able to create a new git repository from the plus button on the right menu. You will be prompted to a window like the following, just insert a name for the repository, in my case I’ll name it: sfdx-ci, leaving Git selected as Version Control System. We’re in but our repo is totally empty, Bitbucket provides some quick commands to initialize our repo. Select the clone command: git clone https://username@bitbucket.org/username/sfdx-ci.git Move to your desktop and open the command line tool and paste and execute the git clone command. This command will create a folder named like the Bitbucket repository already linked to it as a remote branch. Initialize SFDX project Without moving from our position, execute the sfdx create project command: force:project:create -n sfdx-ci Using the -n parameter with the same name of the folder we just cloned from git. Try deploy commands Before we pass to configure our CLI operations let’s try to do it in our local environment. First of all, we must create our sfdx project. The general sfdx deployment flow into a sandbox or production org is: Convert from source form to metadata api form Use the metadata api to deploy These commands will be the same we are going to use inside our Bitbucket Pipelines, You can try in your local environment to see how they work. Set up Continuous Integration In previous sections, we talked mostly about common Salesforce project procedures. In the next one, we are going deeper in the CI world. Starting with a brief introduction to Docker and Bitbucket Pipelines. Lastly, we’ll see how to create a Docker image with SFDX CLI installed and how to use it in our pipeline to run sfdx deploy commands. Docker Wikipedia defines Docker as an open-source project that automates the deployment of software applications inside containers by providing an additional layer of abstraction and automation of OS-level virtualization on Linux. In simpler words, Docker is a tool that allows developers, sys-admins, etc. to easily deploy their applications in a sandbox (called containers) to run on the host operating system i.e. Linux. The key benefit of Docker is that it allows users to package an application with all of its dependencies into a standardized unit for software development. Docker Terminology Before we go further, let me clarify some terminology that is used frequently in the Docker ecosystem. Images – The blueprints of our application which form the basis of containers.Containers – Containers offer a logical packaging mechanism in which applications can be abstracted from the environment in which they actually run.Docker Daemon – The background service running on the host that manages building, running and distributing Docker containers. The daemon is the process that runs in the operating system to which clients talk to.Docker Client – The command line tool that allows the user to interact with the daemon.Docker Hub – A registry of Docker images. You can think of the registry as a directory of all available Docker images.Dockerfile – A Dockerfile is a simple text file that contains a list of commands that the Docker client calls while creating an image. It’s a simple way to automate the image creation process. The best part is that the commands you write in a Dockerfile are almost identical to their equivalent Linux commands. Build our personal Docker Image with SFDX CLI installed Most Dockerfiles start from a parent image. If you need to completely control the contents of your image, you might need to create a base image instead. A parent image is an image that your image is based on. It refers to the contents of the FROM directive in the Dockerfile. Each subsequent declaration in the Dockerfile modifies this parent image. Most Dockerfiles start from a parent image, rather than a base image, this will be our case, we will start from a Node base image. Create a folder on your machine and create a file named Dockerfile, and paste the following code: FROM node:jessie RUN apk add --update --no-cache git openssh ca-certificates openssl curl RUN npm install sfdx-cli --global RUN sfdx --version USER node Let’s explain what this code means, in order: We use a Node base image, this image comes with NPM and Node.js preinstalled. This one is the official Node.js docker image, and jessie indicate the last available version; Next, with the apk add command we are going to install some additional utility tools mainly git and openssl to handle sfdx login using certificates;Lastly using npm command we install the SFDX CLI tools;Just a check for the installed version;And finally the USER instruction sets the user name to use when running the image. Now we have to build our image and publishing it to the Docker Hub so to be ready to use in our Pipelines. Create an account on Docker Hub.Download and install Docker Desktop. If on Linux, download Docker Engine – CommunityLogin to Docker Hub with your credentials.  docker login –username=yourhubusername –password=yourpasswordBuild you Docker Image /sfdxciTest your docker image locally: /sfdxciPush your Docker image to your Docker Hub repository /sfdxci Pushing a docker image on the Docker Hub will make it available for use in Bitbucket pipelines. Bitbucket Pipelines Now that we have a working Docker Image with sfdx installed we can continue configuring the pipeline, that’s the core of our CI procedure. Bitbucket Pipelines is an integrated CI/CD service, built into Bitbucket. It allows you to automatically build, test and even deploy your code, based on a configuration file in your repository. Essentially, it creates containers in the cloud for you. Inside these containers, you can run commands (like you might on a local machine) but with all the advantages of a fresh system, custom configured for your needs. To set up Pipelines you need to create and configure the bitbucket-pipelines.yml file in the root directory of your repository, if you are working with branches,  to be executed this file must be present in each branch root directory. A bitbucket-pipelines.yml file looks like the following: image: atlassian/default-image:2 pipelines: default: - step: script: - echo "Hello world default" branches: features/*: - step: script: - echo "Hello world feature branch" There is a lot you can configure in the bitbucket-pipelines.yml file, but at its most basic the required keywords are: image – the Docker image that will be used to create the Docker Container, You can use the default image (atlassian/default-image:latest), but using a personal one is preferred to avoid time consumption during the installation of required tools (e.g. SFDX CLI), To specify an image, use pipelines – contains all your pipeline definitions.default – contains the steps that run on every push, unless they match one of the other sections.branches – Specify the name of a branch on which run the defined steps, or use a glob pattern (to learn more about the glob patterns, refer to the BitBucket official guide).step – each step starts a new Docker container with a clone of your repository, then runs the contents of your script section. script – a list of cli commands that are executed in sequence. Other than default and branches there are more signals keyword to identify what step must run, such as pull-request, but I leave you to the official documentation, we are going to use only these two. Keep in mind that each step in your pipeline runs a separate Docker container and the script runs the commands you provide in this environment with the repository folder available. Configure SFDX deployment Pipelines Before configuring our pipeline, let’s review for a moment the steps needed to deploy to a production org using sfdx cli. First of all we need to login into our SF org, to do so we have created a Salesforce Connected App to allow us logging in without any manual operation, simply using the following command: sfdx force:auth:jwt:grant --clientid --username --jwtkeyfile keys/server.key --setdefaultdevhubusername --setalias sfdx-ci --instanceurl As you can see there are three parameters that we have to set in this command line: CONSUMER_KEYSFDC_PROD_USERSFDC_PROD_URL Bitbucket offer a way to store some variables that can be used in our pipelines in order to avoid hard-coded values. Under Bitbucket repository Settings → Pipelines → Repository Variables create three variables and fill them in with the data at your disposal. Another parameter required by this command is the server.key file, in this case I simply added it in my repository under the keys folder. It’s not a good practice and I will move it in a more secure position, but for this demonstration it’s enough. Now you are logged in, you need only two sfdx commands to deploy your metadata. One to convert your project in a metadata API format and one to deploy in the sf org: Like the login command we are going to use a Pipeline Variable to indicate the target org username under the -u parameter. OK, now that we know how to deploy a SFDX proggect we can put all this into our pipeline. Move to the root of our sfdx project and create the bitbucket-pipelines.yml file and paste the following code (replace the image name with your own Docker image): image: ivanoguerini/sfdx:latest pipelines: default: step: script: - echo $SFDC_PROD_URL - echo $SFDC_PROD_USER - sfdx force:auth:jwt:grant --clientid $CONSUMER_KEY --username $SFDC_PROD_USER --jwtkeyfile keys/server.key --setdefaultdevhubusername --setalias sfdx-ci --instanceurl $SFDC_PROD_URL - sfdx force:source:convert -d mdapi - sfdx force:mdapi:deploy -d mdapi -u $SFDC_PROD_USER Commit and push this changes to the git repository. Test the CI OK we have our CI up and running, let’s do a quick test. In your project create a new apex class and put some code in it. Then commit and push your changes. git add . git commit -am “Test CI” git push As we said the pipeline will run on every push into the remote repository, you can check the running status under the Pipelines menu. You will see something like this: As you know, the mdapi:deploy command is asynchronous so to check if there was some errors during the deploy you have to run the following command mdapi:deploy:report specifying the jobId or if you prefer you can check the deploy directly in the salesforce Org under Deployment section. Conclusions With this article I wanted to provide you with the necessary knowledge to start configuring a CI using the BitBucket Pipelines. Obviously what I showed you is not enough for a CI that can be used in an enterprise project, there is still a lot to do. Here are some starting points to improve what we have seen: Store the server.key in a safe place so that it is not directly accessible from your repository.Manage the CI in the various sandbox environments usedFor the developer branch, consider automating the creation a scratch org and running Apex Unit Tests. But, I leave this to you.

[realtalk-tj]

Help with course choices for rising sophomore?

Response from Bellatrix:

First, think about your requirements first (for senior lab and for graduating) and make sure you will be able to fulfill those, ideally by junior year. Then, think about your personal limits and if x amount of APs or Post-AP classes is a smart idea. Lastly of course, make sure you take courses you like! If you want to challenge yourself, then make sure you are having fun + learning a lot during the process! Good luck

Response from Aurora:

1. If you suck at reading, don’t take AP bio. The way the class works is that you get assigned a chapter (around 20 densely packed pages) to read almost every class. When you get to class, the first thing you do is take a quiz that is usually completely free response and pretty specific. Then, the teacher asks the class questions while going through a powerpoint/jeopardy. Tests are about every other week, multiple choice, and largely application. You are doing all of your learning by reading the textbook, which can take several hours. It’s actually not that bad after you get used to it, but still a lot of work.

2. Many people say that AP CS is easier for them than foundations/accelerated, because the material is more familiar. So keep that in mind, if you’re unsure of taking AP CS.

3. The absolute max amount of APs you should be taking is 3, which is already kind of too much. As a sophomore, one AP is already a lot. Two APs is going to be a lot of work, and 3 APs will be even more. Most people take one.

4. Don’t feel obligated to take an AP class!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I cannot stress this enough. I know people who are taking AP bio or AP CS just because they felt like they had to, and they’re miserable. There are many people who take no APs, and they’re fine. You will not be behind or stupid if you take classes you want to that aren’t AP. Bottom line is to take whatever YOU want. I really cannot explain how important that is lol

5. Take summer chem if you like chem. Do not take it because you want to be ahead! You will be miserable if you do.

6. CHUM is basically like IBET. I’d say it’s actually probably more work, because you have all the regular class work, and a couple projects on top of that. However, it’s definitely a good idea to take it if you like the structure of IBET.

7. Make sure you’ve looked at pre-reqs for labs you think you might want to do, so you can be sure you’re on track to taking them.

8. Being at TJ is a huge challenge itself. Do not try to challenge yourself much more. Your mental health >>>>>>>>> everything else. Keep in mind what your limits are, and do not think that you’re capable of managing any course-load (because you’re not - no one is). If you know a class will stress you out a lot, don’t take it. Try your best to make your schedule as easy as possible.

9. If you’re in math 4/5, don’t be afraid to take AB next year. Lots of sophomores do, and it won’t make you look bad at all. Mr. Auerbach also said that BC will be harder next year.

Good luck! I’m sorry if this didn’t answer your questions, but if you have any further ones, feel free to send them here!