#however if i think too hard abt these two i will cry

[tarteggs]

since when have we been so different?

[waxflowerexe]

Shoutaaaa x Little Reader!!!!

I have materialised, escaped the void if you will

Anyway a little Drabble Abt Shota discovering ur little side, oral fixation etc and how I like to think he would deal w it🥹 The feels were felt in this one tehe very daddy but also quite subtle I think ALSO SMUT WARNING LOLOL

Ignore the bad grammar lolz I haven’t written in ages lolol MINORS GO TF OUT AS USUAL 😍

Daddy Sho x secretly little reader (?)

Usually after an especially long day you and Shouta typically fuck out your frustrations, it’s slow and intimate at first but sooner than later you both pick up the pace. Sex quickly becomes hot and desperate as you both chased the relief of an inevitable orgasm. You of course had your own coping mechanisms, colouring, watching childhood cartoons and a slight oral fixation. This was of course well kept from Sho, you already felt insecure about your age gap, you didn’t want him to think you were any more immature that you may have been.

Today was different, albeit you didn’t realise until he was balls deep in you telling you what a ‘nasty slut’ you were. Usually you relished in being beneath him, letting him control you. You liked the feeling of helplessness that overcame you when he touched you after a day overthinking and honestly just thinking in general. However, today something snapped. It all felt too much, Shota’s strength felt scary, his words made you scared…upset. You couldn’t place it but you knew you hated it. Tears welled in your eyes, as your safe word left your lips in a muffled cry.

Of course he stopped immediately.

“Baby what’s wrong”

You couldn’t even begin to describe what was wrong, usually this was what you needed. How you needed him. But today you just felt mushy and vulnerable and small, in a different way. You dreaded the day that your secrets would intervene with your relationship. But it did, and today you didn’t want to be broken, instead you wanted to be treated delicately, by a handler to fearful to leave even the slightest scratch, scared of break you. But it was too many words, to many complex thoughts for your stupid little brain.

So instead of replying, the tears ramp up until your sobbing incoherent apologies. A confused Shouta starts to worry more,

“Babe, it’s fine it’s okay” and a million other comforts flow from his lips but still you can’t pinpoint the words to explain, to tell him what’s wrong.

“Pretty girl, does something hurt”

He moves you into his lap and began rocking you, almost like a baby, looking for any bruises and cuts. The simple back and forth was so soothing and as he watched you melt into his touch it clicks, this was what you wanted, this was how you needed him. As he watches you calm down, he realises it too. Your usual arrangement was off the table today and that was fine.

He had an inkling that you worked a little different to girls he had been with before, he knew you fell into a hazy and vulnerable mindset. He saw how you sucked your little thumbs when you were stressed and how you took to digital colouring pages when you thought he wasn’t looking. All these little things he thought were so cute but he let you engage in these thing so in your own time, as not to intrude. Although, today you needed help.

“Did my pretty girl need cuddles?” he coos softly

You nod in response his tone making you mind fuzzy. He rarely used this tone, and you were always too nervous to ask for more.

He notices you fiddle with his fingers

“Does babygirl need something from me”

You nod, unsure

He silently slips two fingers in your mouth. You suckle softly, humming in content, glad he understood what you wanted.

“Good girl, my baby works so hard, she deserves to come home and wrap up in my arms. That’s it baby, close your eyes”

You let your eyes fall shut

“Good girl daddy’s here”

Your tense slightly, you’d only ever used this term in the bedroom. But before you can react he hushes you, bouncing you on his knee.

“Shhh baby, go to sleep”

You would both have to talk about things in the morning. But for now he was happy to hush you to sleep, tracing circles on your back and petting you gently.

Me bc I WANT SHOTA AND THIS AND UGHHHHH TO BE LOVED AND ACCEPTED

Anyway look after ur selves beauties and drink water!!! Especially since it’s so hot

More mid writing soon lovelies

Love Flo🌸~

[futurewriter2000]

Second Chance

A/N: I don't know how this can end in a happy ending but... I'll try. I didn't even know how to start writing this request but I think I did fairly well and even better than I expected. I think I can do it better though but for now, I'll give you this. Short-ish and sweet. I tried to put everything into one fic.

REQUEST #14 (wattpad) @fredsdeath: HI!! I love all ur books especially the fred weasley book and uhm i was wondering if you could do my request abt how y/n pretends to have amnesia and not remember fred bc fred was her ex and broke her heart in their past relationship like happy emding or not its fine and this is just a suggestion its still okay if you dont do it tho :D

XX

They say that the first few months always feel like a true honeymoon and then the reality hits but it wasn't like that with you and Fred. It was different because the two of you were friends first before anything and that changed everything. You knew who he was, the good and the bad, as well as he did. The two of you had this undestructable bond, nothing in the world could break. It felt real, it felt true, it felt like a once in a life-time love and you believed that.

You did... until you didn't anymore.

There were moments of Fred acting ditant. Sometimes when you looked into his eyes, he wasn't there and when he smiled, it felt forced. You felt like you were too much for him so you took a step back as well, thinking that space was all that he needed. You were different than him however, you didn't want space, you needed reassurence that he is still the Fred that will hold your hands and kiss them randomly when the two of you are laughing or just sitting together. You believed that the Fred that walked down the hall, nagging you jokingly until you retorded a sarcastic comment back, pretending to be furious with him until he nagged you until you laughed- was still somehow there. You believed that the Fred who made your stomach cramp either from laughter or butterflies will appear soon. It's just a hard transitioning moment, now that the new headmistress is on. He's coming back... he's still Fred.

He wasn't though.

"What do you mean?" your eyes twitched and you couldn't figure out whether you were angry or sad. You kept looking at the ground, not knowing when your hands ripped themselves from his.

"It's not you, I swear, it's just-"

"It's you." you looked at him, your lip trembling but you refused to cry in front of him.

"It is..." he bit his lower lip. "I just don't think that this is it." he said and you refused to look at him. He forced a smile and swayed on his feet. "We can still be friends." he said, touching your shoulder playfully as if all of a sudden you will place a smile on your face, bright and jolly but you turned your head away, wiped the crocodile tear that fell from your eyes and looked at him.

"Who is she?" you said with a sharp cold tone.

"There isn't-"

"You never lied to me, Fred. Don't start now." you glared.

He looked at you and pursed his lips together. He looked away and you let out a laugh from disbelief.

"I had a feeling but I always refused to listen to it. You know why?" you paused. "Because my trust for you was bigger than my insecurities but you just made me believe I was going crazy for such a long time until you grew balls to tell me."

"I just kissed her once-"

"Oh-" you literally heard your heart break inside your chest.

"She KISSED ME-" he mumbled. "I swear, I didn't kiss her first, she just sort of leaned in and I pulled away and I didn't want to say anything, I swear because I thought it was nothing but she just sort of... I don't know... I couldn't stop thinking about it."

"So you want to slag around."

"NO!" he started to get frustrated, shaking his head. "I just- I'm lost right now. I don't know what I want."

"You want her."

"No-" he shook his head. "I don't know... maybe... I don't know."

"Fuck you." you said, slapping him hard on his cheek that it turned red immediatelly. "You just wasted fucking 8 months of my life." and with that you turned around.

----

It's been a long year now since then and you knew her name... not that you truly wanted it but you heard of a short fling between Fred and Angelina Jonson. She was another good friend of his and you wished you figured it out sooner but you haven't.

You've cried. You did. More than just one crocodile tear. You've made a mess from your room and your roommates didn't really mind. They've been patient and graceful with you. They've also been a good distraction from your emotions and you were glad you weren't when Fred made his great parting with fireworks in Hogwarts that year.

You've put yourself together since then. You did and you've heard he's been with that woman, another woman, a few other women and you didn't want to hear none of it. Your friends kept telling you about it, despite you didn't want to. You heard about his shop and all of other things.

Now... well, now you've had your own appartment, which was quite hard with the economy but you wanted your place since you were an early teen. And to think of it, getting an appartment was easier than getting a job that pays well on your education. But it did. You've worked in a small bussiness, grammar checking documents that came in and out. Something close to an accounting. It wasn't what you wanted but it was something.

You haven't seen Fred in a year and a half. He was still on your mind though. He was. It was as if he put a chip into you that keeps rewinding time back to when the two of you were in love.

What you hated more was that you did move on but somehow he was still following you everywhere you went. You didn't see him anywhere and you knew that was a good sign but you were always on the lookout. Close to his shop, you felt anxious and you thought it over what would happen if he came out now and see you. You didn't know. You didn't know anything. Your brain turned off like nothing.

But that never happened and so you were okay with moving on.

---

So how did you end up here?

How did he end up here?

The last thing you told him was that he should have fun with your replacement and he did... for a short time. It really infuriated him that you told him that but Angelina really wasn't the one either. He pushed it as far as he could but something didn't click with her. He didn't feel joy with her, he felt obligated to be with her but he grew tired of being with someone.

He told you he forgets people easily but why did seeing you hurt so much. It was like a sting into his heart- quick but short. He couldn't mumble a word when you stood there and there was no shine in your eyes, no glow on you as he remembered you. There was a smile but not as joyful.

You stood there... still beautiful.

He hated that. He hated that you were still beautiful- more than him... since always.

He turned his head away, not wanting to look at you anymore. He was furious- so darn furious. Why didn't anybody tell him about you?

"There she is!" Remus came over with his hands on your shoulders, gently and formally.

You smiled brightly at him because you adored him as a professor. He was the only professor who made a course feel important and interesting.

"She was my best student and she now works in a small company for accounting- a shame to waste your talents there."

Sirius, he stood up tall and mighty, almost king-like and you felt infatuated by his kingly presence. His eyes were cold blue but his look was warm and safe.

"Aren't you supposed to be in Azkaban or something?" you joked and he laughed.

"Been there, didn't like it much." he retorded back and a few of the group laugh. "She's been working for me too for a bit. Remus recommended her- just for a short time and she turned out to be trustworthy. I bet she went to Hogwarts with you."

Ginny ran to you into a hug immediately and smiled up to you... well not up anymore. She seemed taller than you by a few centimeters. The two of you always had a great friendship, despite Fred. She adored you and you adored her.

"I can't believe you're here!" she exclaimed and you laughed, hugging her tightly.

"Me neither. This man put me through hell."

"I did not." Sirius gasped.

"Don't leave him alone in this house for long ever again."

"We have so much to catch up!"

And you did. With the whole group. You did work with Sirius through Remus. You've never really met him personally, always through some Howlers, letters, some other secret forms of communication and he was always so arrogant through it. He had grumpy and sassy remarks and at first you were professional about it but through time you've had enough and returned the energy. It has mostly been with the documents you've been grammarly correcting. They had been reciepts from big, luxiourious wizard families and you could see in some of those reciepts which were on the bad side, which on the good and which were fleeding and unreliable.

You didn't know about the other participants except Remus, Tonks and Sirius. Soon you figured Moody was one as well when he trampled into your office, asking questions and now you've met others.

You've never been much of a leap of faith person but you've always had a strong urge to stand for fairness and justice. You've fired up when you had to, not knowing until you went to bed that night. Remus saw that in you and he knew that all you needed was a little push.

You've always been reliable and when you promised something, you didn't back out, even if you were extremely anxious. He knew you could never back out from this. A bit manipulating but well, that was the push.

You've looked at Moody with your mouth on the ground.

"Turn into Harry?" you looked at all the others, especially at Remus.

"You don't have to, if you don't want to." said Harry.

"No, it's not that." you laughed. "Couldn't we just turn Harry into some random Muggle and transport him?"

The others thought about it as it could be.

"No!" Moody shouted. "Would you think they'd just let some random Muggle with a stick in his boot let into the Ministry?" he growled at you, approaching you. "No- now dress up lil priss." and he shoved clothes at you.

You looked after him than walked to Harry. "Are you comfortable with this? Us... turning into you?"

He gave you a comforting smile. "Not really but a plan is a plan. My comfort is not really in question." he offered you a smile and you returned it, though you felt a bit sad for the boy, espeicially when others made awful comments about them.

What you didn't notice was the little peeps Fred was giving you when you undressed, easily unclasping your bra under your Harry shirt and throwing it in the corner.

George apperead in front of him as Harry, giving him a grin meanwhile Fred just put his glassess on and pretended not to look.

"You're with me little priss." one of the Harry's told you and winked at you.

As you walked behind fake Harry, you passed what you thought was Fred and he called out your name. "Hey, (Y/n)."

You turned around. "What?"

"Stay safe."

You looked at him and nodded, turning back to the fake Harry, feeling your heart beating fast. Not because of Fred... this was pure fear.

---

Fred just turned back into himself, laughing with his father about the trip when Ginny told him about George. He was running into the living room, finding his best friend bloody on the couch.

"Shit, George." he came to his side.

"I'm howy." George whispered.

"What George?" Fred leaned in worriedly.

"I said..." George took a breath. "I'm holy now Fred."

Fred rolled his eyes and laughed from all the relief. "Only you can crack a joke about a blown up ear."

He looked up, smiling joyfully when the others smiled back, hugging him and George. It wasn't until two were missing. He looked around again. "Where are Tonks and (y/n)?" he asked but the others looked around and nobody was around.

"Remus is waiting for them, I'll go out and check." said Arthur but just as he was about to head out the door, Remus came rushing the door with you in his arms. His shirt was soaked in your blood, Tonks' hands as well.

"MOVE!" shouted Remus as Arthur cleared the table so that Remus could place you there gently.

"It came out of nowhere- I don't know who is was but she was blown off our broom and fell hard on the woods. She hit her head pretty hard." Tonks spoke quickly, like your life depended on it.

Ginny and Molly were right by your side, Remus as well. Fred just watched with his eyes wide open. Everything was gone, all the anger, all of it, out of his system. There was no room for anger, only regret and sadness.

"(y/n)- come on little priss, you have to wake up." Remus slapped your cheeks gently.

It was so sudden. You laid there calmly and like you were awaken from the dead, you jumped up and took a deep breath in.

"Where am I?!" you looked around, feeling your head pounding but everything was extremely bloody.

You heard voices around you but none of them were clear.

"You're safe-" you looked around but you recognised that voice anywhere.

"Professor Lupin? Where's Madam Pince my head is-" you were just about to say something when you started choking on your own blood.

Fred fell on the floor, just by George when he saw the sight.

Arthur saw the terror in Fred's eyes and shouted at the other. "GET HIM OUT OF HERE! ALL OF YOU OUT!"

---

Fred had a whole review of your life together back in Hogwarts. Everything turned back- everything. The small things, the big things and he realised that not once did the two of you had a bad memory together. Not one but until he broke things off.

He was pacing up and down outside the living room. Ginny kept trying to calm him down but he was not consolable. Not until you were completely alright. Not until he comes back and you're breathing and smiling at him.

Finally Arthur came to Fred, only to Fred because he knew of their past together. His expression was grim but it wasn't something Fred could read at the moment. He had you in perfect image. Since always.

"How is she?!" he quickly asked and everybody stood up and listened as well.

"She's living and breathing." he said, putting his hand on Fred's shoulder. "Remus is great at taking care of people, so she's resting with George... however... she kept recalling back a few years..." he looked up worriedly. "She kept asking for Dumbledore and... McGonagall..." he continued. "Remus says it could be shock or some short amnesia."

"What does that mean, dad?" Fred asked but his father only looked away. "Dad!"

"I don't know really... only time will tell when she wakes up."

Fred burst through the door and found his two favorite people laying on the couch. It was odd sight becuase you were there moving your lips and looking at your roommate, fist bumping him.

"Samesiess." George shouted weakley. "I've always wanted a girl roommate."

"Ew." you said, laughing.

"Not like that- Merlin." George said. "If moving my eyes wouldn't hurt I'd roll my eyes right now."

"If I could have the strenght to move my hands I'd show you the middle finger."you replied and could hear him laugh, caughing.

Fred smiled from relief and walked confidently into the room. "Hey, you two are on bed rest, stop talking and laughing." he said, sitting at George's side first. He looked at you and you looked at him.

"George?" you said worriedly. "I didn't know you had a sibling?"

"I have eight of them... or seven... six... I really don't know..."

"I didn't know you had one that looks exactly like you." you furrowed your eyebrows and it was only for a joke. You've always wanted to play a joke but something in Fred's eyes.

Something in his eyes made him come towards you and look at you with the same look he did all those years. The same eyes that you prayed for such a long time ago.

"You don't remember me?" he asked.

And you haven't got any clue why you turned your head and mumbled no. You turned it away from him because you felt something hurt inside of you so much by having him looking at you so close. Your heart was tearing up inside of you all over again and you wished, you prayed, you said you never met him because that was what you truly wanted. You wanted that he never existed in your brain because it just... hurts so much.

"Please leave me alone." you said and kept shutting your eyes.

Fred backed away, terror in his eyes, his heart, rage? Perhaps shock- something was in his chest, burning up his throat. He didn't hear the pain in your throat or the tears that fell from your eyes when you turned away. He couldn't function properly.

"Fred..." he heard George but he just stormed outside.

It was as if something was spinning in his head. It was so horrible.

Ginny came after him, calling out his name, asking what is wrong.

"WHAT'S WRONG?!" he turned around, a big forced smile of disbelief, almost wicked-like. "I ALMOST LOST TWO PEOPLE THAT ARE IMPORTANT TO ME! BESIDES THAT ONE LOST AN EAR, THE OTHER LOST A BLOODY MEMORY OF ME- OF OUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP!!!"

Ginny stood there. Usually she would shout something back but she just let him yell.

"Ginny- she-" he started to break down, falling onto his knees and pulling his long legs into a hug.

Ginny walked to his side and hugged him around the shoulders. "It could be temporary... she's just in a shock."

"She remembers George."

"How do you know? She just talked to him like she woud with another person."

"She wouldn't talk to me like this..."

"She would." Ginny added and Fred looked at her, letting a laugh.

"Yeah... she would... she was unpredicatable like that." he said.

"Why did the two of you even break up?"

"I don't know really." Fred mumbled. "But I don't know if I can live through her not remembering us... you know?" he looked at Ginny, then laid his head on her shoulder. "We used to have so much fun... when we were together. She was so snarky and confident..."

"She's always so happy and has such a good heart." Ginny added.

"Yeah... she was perfect and... I really didn't know we would work so well together but I don't know... I thought she would be a fling and I wasn't ready to commit- she just... she deserved so much better than me, I always knew that."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... look at her and look at me." he lookd at Ginny.

"Fred, she looked at you as if you were the whole world for her, not because of your looks or it was because of your looks, I doubt that though but she didn't want anybody else. She wanted you." Ginny said and Fred looked at her.

"I don't know Ginny."

"You do know, Fred. You were the one who thought you didn't deserve her and with the way you were acting after the two of you broke up, just told me how much she hurt you." she continued without any filter. "And it wasn't that she hurt you... it was that you were furious that you fucked up a good thing."

Fred looked at his sister with a confused look. She didn't use that kind of language. "I don't know when you grew up so much, Ginny." he said and laid his head back on her shoulder. "But... if she forgot about us... and me... I don't know- she was the only person who really knew me and it was hard for her to trust me in the first place. When she did, it felt like I met the right person to feel safe with..."

"Like I said... we can hope that she does remember."

---

You and George were laying in the darkness, both resting. You were glad the whole thing was over, even though you almost couldn't have made it out alive.

"Do you really not remember Fred?" asked George.

There was silence but you looked to the darkness beside you where George was speaking from. "I wish I didn't." you said.

"Why did you tell him then you didn't?" he asked calmly.

You turned your head back to the dark ceiling. "I just... I actually don't know... it was a joke at first..."

"I gathered that but he just saw two of people he cared about almost die in front of his eyes so I believe him for not catching it."

"Then he just looked at me with those eyes... like that he cares and I just... I don't know I wanted to make sure if he does or not so I just said no."

There was a small laugh from the other side. "Did you get your answer?"

"Kind of." you shrugged.

"(y/N)." he said in a serious tone. "He bloody loved you. You didn't know how he was when you weren't around. First he was furious, then he was frustrated when you didn't catch our fireworks, then he was melancholic for a while and all of a sudden he got an urge to go after every girl that walked into the shop- age appropriate to be clear." he stopped for a moment. "He cared, he really did- he didn't know how much he had lost until months later. Angelina couldn't compare to you. He wasn't as ambitious and happy as he was with you. He was absent and lost..."

There was a loud silence after that and you felt as if you have to say something in return. "I didn't know you could preform such long speeches."

You heard shuffling on the other side and suddenly something soft landed on your stomach. "Owww!"

"Shut up, we're both poor right now." he said and you laughed , throwing the pillow back.

---

George was awake and walking. He was just getting suited for the wedding when Fred was tying his bowtie. He walked into the living room and saw your space empty. He looked around and tried to find any traces of your disappearance.

It wasn't until he heard a grunt from the bathroom and you walked out, pinning something into your hair. "Hey Ginny this bandage is so unnecessary-" you looked up and he was staring at you as you stared back. His hands were at the untied bowtie and yours were stucking a flower somewhere where your bandage was loose around your head.

"You remember Ginny?" he asked and you kept looking at him.

You let your hands fall down to your side and you took a few steps forward. "I do." you said and grabbed his tie and started to throw it around into a bowtie.

"Do you remember me?" he asked softly as he looked down at you but you kept your eyes on his bowtie.

You were silent for a while and started to twist it around to stay on its place. "I can do it better." you said and untied it again.

He smiled at that. "A perfectionist, you remember that." he said and he could see a smile on your lips. "Please, (y/n)..." he said and placed his hands on top of yours.

You finally looked up and found his eyes in such pain. You didn't think eyes so joyful could look that tormented. "I remember you Fred." you smiled softly, then looked back at the bowtie. "Just like I remember how to tie a perfect bowtie." you smiled and fixed it on his collar.

He breathed out a long breath of relief. He saw your hands leave his bowtie and he immedately started to fix your bandage and hair flower. "You're beautiful today." he said as he continued to tuck in the last peaces of the bandage before going to the flower. "You're beautiful every day."

You continued to look up, his slick and gentle hands touching your scalp and spreading warmth, even the memories you forgot existed. "I'm sorry." you said and he raised an eyebrow. "I always knew who you were..." you said and his hands dropped, still holding the flower that was supposed to go into your hair.

"You did?"

"I did." you said. "You were so close and you were just- and it really hurt- you really hurt me." you said, looking into his eyes, knowing yours were filling themselves with tears. "It was the first time I saw you so close after such a long time and everything came back- and it hurt so much I wished to forget you." you said, avoiding his gaze.

He didn't say anything. To be honest, he wasn't furious or in shock. "You could have done worse, really..." he gave an awkward smile and you laughed. He put his hand back up to your head and started placing it into your hair.

You only observed and as you did so, his hand fell to your cheek and brushed it with his thumb. The two of you were looking at each other, felt like a whole century since the two of you were looking at each other like this... and it felt like yesterday.

Time truly is an illusion, isn't it.

"Please, give me a second chance." he said, leaning his forehead onto yours.

"Fred..." you sighed.

"I know it's a lot to ask but please- I promise, I won't run away again like I did last time." he said, pulling back and cupping your cheeks. "We're special. I know you know... I know we are... please..."

You smiled, closing your eyes and feeling all this warmth, safety and love over your body.

Hope.

There's nothing wrong with having hope.

There's nothing wrong with second chances.

You looked up at him. "Second chance then."

[jewishregulus]

may we have some of ur nsfw reg hcs pretty pls 🤲

okay . putting these under the cut u sly dogs . everybody in my asks is horny ….. i welcome it !!

• it is very important for me to say that my regulus is a bottom and does not top atleast w james he may like . try it out . but he doesn’t enjoy it . he prefers to be the one getting penetrated , personal preference !!!! i can see him power bottoming although i think he is more subby, he likes giving up control and feeling Good . i respect switch jeggy, it isn’t my truth

• i think alot of jegulus sex (sorry most of these will be abt jegulus bc i love them Lolll) is just james wanting to treat regulus like a little porcelain doll …. not just in him being fragile but also he is His . to do whatever he wants he just has to ask nicely and sweetly and he can pose reg however he wants !!! i do think reg is bratty but i think a lot of the time he is v sweet n teary in bed ….. an angel ……….

• but i do also think regulus brings out something in james that makes him want to be rough n mean in bed that he has Never felt before . a big thing for me is regulus making james Feel things he hasn’t before . he’s always been a vanilla softy sex guy but now he wants to bruise regulus up and make him cry so he can be the one to patch him up again :(( he loves after care and therefore regulus does too

• there r like two versions of regulus in my head : virgin whore who has no concept of real sex and only understands from books so he fantasizes about getting the shit fucked out of him, hard and rough, probably got a breeding kink going on, but when actually in the bedroom is SO EMBARRASSED . TO DO ANYTHING . james asks regulus to take off his jacket and regulus is like oh my … that’s … wow … you want me to … undress….? and show you… my collarbone peeking out of my button up…. oh… oh my

• and whoring it up regulus who sleeps around HELLA before james and when they actually do sleep together is CONSISTENTLY begging james to be rougher and meaner .. but regulus is also in a soft subby state of mind james doesn’t see from him often so he is WHIPPPPPEEEED

• daddy kink , breeding kink, praise kink , choking kink. The big four . but i also think regulus has an obscure fantasy of being tied up w the purpose of free use but being made love to soft and gentle anyways . just the idea that his lover could have him in Anyway but still chooses to worship and appreciate yk…. gets him going

• i also think he’s fucking EVERYWHERE but a damn bed …. on the counter on the couch in the car in the shower …. a bed is fun but reg likes the thrill of just doing anything anywhere bc he can … bc his house is full of love now so he can do whatever he wants !!

• oral fixation , loves sucking james off more than anything loves sucking ANYONE off more than anything . gave bcj 99% of his blowjobs . big fan . swallows w james. spits w barty. thank you for your time .

• if we r rolling w boypussy regulus he’s a big fan of being eaten out of course ….. james is a chronic munch so of course he is committing to it and regulus’ life was forever changed

• jegulus does not wear condoms once they enter a serious relationship . regulus doesn’t fuck w them . he understands the necessity but doesn’t like !! will use when he has to . but as soon as he acknowledges james is the one for him and he’ll have no other parters and it’s safe to he celebrates . big win for him .

• did i mention the breeding kink . i need to . that’s the jegulus kink fr . regulus wants a BABY in him damnit !!!!

okay that’s all for now . too embarrassed to continue . hope some of you enjoy

[matty-bear]

Curing Dysphoria [N.S]

type: fic !

pairing: nick sturniolo x trans ftm!reader

warnings: SFW, fluff, angst (???), mentions and talk of dysphoria, going on testosterone

summary: you have always struggled heavily with dysphoria ever since you came out as trans. You tried your best to cure it but nothing seemed to work, despite all of your efforts. When you're having another spiral about your dysphoria, nick decides to call up a friend of his who ends up giving you advice that would eventually rid all of your dysphoria and help you pass. 

notes: decided we needed more nick x trans ftm fics in this community so i cooked smth up ;3 dont be shy to send in requests that include a trans reader for nick fics ! i am a trans guy myself so writing some will most likely help me feel better abt myself .  also its so over for you mfs when i go on t 

WC: 4151

previous events will be in italics !

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　 ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊ ＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　 ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊ ＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　 ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊ ＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　 ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊ ＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚

Your journey with being a trans male was always difficult for you. It was never easy for anyone, so why would you expect it to be easy for you? You constantly struggled with gender expression and dysphoria ever since you came to terms with your gender in your early years of middle school. You often spent hours upon hours sobbing on the floor of your bathroom because you didn’t feel like you were passing enough or simply didn’t like how you looked in general. 

Ever since you started dating Nick, who knew of you being trans way before you guys started dating due to you coming out to him when you two became very close friends, he always gave you constant support when you felt shitty about yourself. He often held you close to him when you were having an episode and whispered sweet words that consisted of “You’re such a pretty boy,” “My precious boy,” and “You're so handsome, baby.” 

His reassurance never failed to calm you down for the time being. However as you continued to date Nick and your dysphoria grew worse, you knew you had to do something about it. However, since you weren’t friends or aware of other trans people in the community, you didn’t know who to turn to for help. 

The most you were doing to try to help with your dysphoria was cutting your hair short, binding with either a binder or tape, and dressing yourself in the most masculine way possible. (This was the least you could do or rather think of to try to make yourself pass as a guy) If you wanted to try extra hard to pass, you would put some makeup on to make certain features pop out more, like your sideburns and cheekbones.

However, you felt that this wasn’t doing enough for you and didn’t feel like you were passing enough despite the constant reassurance from Nick, his brothers, and your friends. You still hated your voice, (which seemed too high for your liking) the thinness of your limbs, and just how feminine you felt and looked as a whole. 

When you were spiraling and sobbing profusely in the bathroom one afternoon with Nick holding you tightly against him, the boy knew he had to figure out a way to help you. 

After a while, your cries eventually subside to soft sniffles. Even though your eyes seemingly ran out of tears to shed, you still felt the need to cry more. You slowly open your eyes and take in the minimal light in the bathroom, the main light source being Nick’s single candle resting on the counter in front of you. Simply looking at the light causes your eyes to strain and you soon find yourself shutting them again with a soft hiss.

As you rest your head back on Nick’s chest with a heavy exhale and gaze down at your body, you feel the male shift underneath you. You quickly lift your head at the small move and watch as your boyfriend takes his phone out of his pocket and pulls it to his face, a focused expression clear on his face. 

“What are you doing?” You ask, your voice coming out hoarse due to all the crying you just did. 

“Trying to call a friend of mine,” Nick replies, his gaze staying fixed on his cell as his eyes scan the screen. 

Your eyebrows furrow in confusion as you continue to gaze at the male. “Can I ask for what?” 

“I’m asking them for advice on your behalf.” 

“Advice? Like for being trans?” 

“Yup.” 

Your eyebrows kit together even more at Nick’s statement. A few beats of silence flow between the two of you, the only sound being the soft tapping Nick draws from his cell as he taps on his screen. After a moment, you speak up again, “You know someone that’s trans?” 

“Yeah, he’s the coolest mother fucker I know. After you of course. You have to meet him sometime.” Nick momentarily looks down at you to send you a warm smile before diverting his eyes back to his phone. “Anyways, he came out as trans about six years ago and I'm sure he’ll know how to help you with your dysphoria and stuff. I would give you advice on this myself but I'm not trans and don’t want to misguide you or anything.” 

You softly nod your head and sit up a little to peer down at Nick’s phone, your eyes intently watching his fingers flex as they diligently work on tapping and scrolling on his screen. After a few moments, Nick pulls up a contact and hits the call button. 

“Would you like to talk to him yourself?” Nick asks gently, the hand that’s resting on your side gently caressing your clothed skin. “I can put it on speaker if you’d like. If not, that’s perfectly fine and I can do the speaking for you.” 

You force your lips together as you ponder for a moment. “I can talk to him.” You reply with a small head nod. “Can you help me through? Like, talk to him?” 

“Of course.” Just as Nick lands a soft peck on your temple, the muffled sound of shuffling runs through your ears. You quickly whip your head around at the sudden sound, your eyes soon landing on Nick’s phone. At the sight of the ongoing call screen, you relax a little and gaze up at Nick, waiting for him to make the first move. 

“Kit?” Nick calls after a few moments. Immediately, the muffling sounds come to a quick halt and silence can be heard on the other line. 

“Nick?” Kit calls back, the deep and smoothness of his voice causing your eyes to widen ever so slightly. 

The male simply uttered a reply and you’re already intimidated. 

“Are you busy right now?” Nick asks. 

“No?..” Kit’s voice trails off, pure and utter confusion laced in his tone. “Wait, did I call you or did you call me?” 

“I called you. Did you think it was the other way around?” 

“To be honest, yeah.” Kit chuckles softly, “What’s up though?” 

“You know y/n right?” 

“Yeah, of course I do. You won’t shut the fuck up about him.” Your jaw slacks at the comment and you slowly turn your head to look over at Nick, the sight of the red tint dusting over his cheeks and tips of his ears causing you to smile cheekily. When Nick doesn’t reply after a few seconds, the sound of Kit laughing softly sounds in your ears. “Sorry, had to. But what about him? Is everything alright?” 

“Not necessarily. His dysphoria has been getting bad lately and I have no idea how to help him.” 

“Oh, I see. Is he with you right now? I want to ask him some stuff if that’s alright with you.” 

“He’s right here with me actually.” 

“Oh, sweet. Hey, y/n!” Kit greets, his tone nothing but friendly. You could sense that the boy was smiling on the other end just by how cheerful he sounded. “I wasn’t lying about Nick yapping about you. I swear to God that kid does not have an off button when it comes to you.” 

“Kit, I swear to God. Shut the hell up. I called you for help not to be called out.” Nick grumbles through gritted teeth. 

“Sorry, I’m stopping. Anyways, y/n do you mind telling me what you’re struggling with the most right now? You could tell me everything. I just want to know what’s going on in that head of yours right now so I can give you the best advice.” 

After glancing over at Nick with an anxious expression and gaining an encouraging kiss on the lips from him, you begin to open up to Kit about everything. During your small rant, Kit listened intently and only hummed here and there to let you know he was listening. When you’re finished, you exhale heavily and wipe away the few tears that managed to escape your irises with the back of your hand. 

“I think I know what you need,” Kit says, the soft and quick pattering of footsteps sounding from his end. 

“You do?” You ask, your eyebrows knitting together as you gaze down at Nick’s phone. 

“Yup. There’s this thing that the majority of trans people use called Testosterone. Or better known as ‘T.’ It helps our body go get rid of the feminine traits that we have and practically replace them with masculine ones. I’ve been taking ‘T’ for about five years now and it’s helped cure all of my dysphoria. Shits a life changer I'm telling you.” 

“What are the effects of it? Like what are the changes exactly?” 

“Well for starters, they vary between trans guys but it makes them taller, helps with hair and public hair growth, muscle gain, voice changes, and they develop a higher…” Kit's voice trails off at the end of his sentence, tension suddenly filling the air as silence sounds from his end. 

“Higher what?” You ask, worry and panic filling your veins as your hand raises to your mouth. Just as you begin to bite your nails out of anxiousness, Kit clears his throat before he continues. 

“Sex drive. You have a higher sex drive. I would go into more depth about it but I assume you haven’t gone through a bottom surgery and still have your area so I won't get into it. Also, a very important thing, if you continue to take ‘T,’ your period will eventually stop.” 

“Are you serious?” Your mouth opens slightly in shock at Kit’s last statement. “Like the period thing.” 

“Dead serious. I'm telling you this shit is a fucking live saver. Anyways, you think you're up to taking it?” 

“It sounds heavenly so absolutely. How do I get it?” 

“Well, you need to get it prescribed to you by a doctor. I can send you to mine so you won’t have to be as anxious going to the office. I promise you, they’re the sweetest person ever and will be so patient with you during the first few weeks or so of you taking it.” 

“I’d appreciate that, actually. I have a lot of anxiety when it comes to doctors and shit so going to see someone that you are accustomed to seeing will help ease me a bit.” 

“Word. I’ll text them here in a minute to let them know I'm sending you their way before I text Nick the office’s number.”

“Alright, thank you, Kit. I really appreciate it.” 

“Don’t sweat it! If you ever need help, don’t be shy to tell Nick. Hell, he can even send you my number so we can chat one-on-one if you’re up to it. All your call though! Don’t want to push you out of your comfort zone or anything.” 

“I’ll have Nick send me your number. I think it’d be easier texting you myself than talking to you through Nick.” 

“Sounds good. Well, if that’s all I'm going to dip now. Text or call me if anything comes up! Nice talking to you, y/n! Oh, and Nick too I guess.” 

Nick rolls his eyes, an unamused expression clear on his face as his thumb hovers over the end call button. “Goodbye Kit,” Nick states, his monotone voice drawing a small chuckle from the male on the other line. 

“Goodbye Nick.” The moment Kit voices his reply,  Nick ends the call and stuffs his phone back in the planet of his pants. After he huffs softly and gazes down at you, he watches as a small smile creeps onto your lips. Feeling his eyes on you, you pick your head up and lock eyes with Nick, a soft red hue immediately taking over the tips of your ears and cheeks. 

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?” You ask, a hand coming up to cover your flushed face. 

“You look so happy it’s so cute,” Nick replies with a small chuckle. Before you get to add to the conversation, Nick cups your face with both his hands and begins peppering your face with small pecks. The action immediately draws soft laughter from your lips, your eyes shutting and the blush on your cheeks deepening a shade or two. 

“Nick!” You exclaim through giggles. You set both your hands on Nick’s shoulders and begin to softly shove him away. After a few moments, the male finally pulls away and gives you the largest and cheesiest smile. 

“I love you so much, you know that?” Nick gushes as he sets his forehead against yours. 

“I love you more.” You reply softly, a shy chuckle escaping your lips. The moment Nick lands another tender kiss on your cheek, the sound of his phone dinging alerts the both of you. 

“God, that’s kids fast as hell,” Nick mumbles. You pull back from Nick’s grasp to allow him to grab his phone out of his pocket again. After turning the device on and scanning his eyes over the screen for a few seconds, he flips the phone towards you. You blink a few times to get your eyes to adjust to the bright light drawing from Nick’s phone and when you’re finally able to see his screen properly, your eyes skim over the single message resting on the lock screen. 

KIT

Just texted Remi. Here’s their number xxx-xxx-xxxx txt them when you want! 

Your eyes light up at the text and you quickly lift your head to meet Nick’s gaze. “Text them!” You exclaim as you latch onto the boy’s shoulders. As you begin to shake him, Nick chuckles softly and rests his hands on your arms. 

“Alright, alright. I won’t be able to text them if you keep shaking me.” Nick says through soft laughter. You immediately stop your actions and drop your hands onto your lap at the male’s statement.

“My bad.” As you rub your nape and gaze down at the floor, Nick smiles softly and sets a hand in your hair to ruffle it. The action draws a small surprised exclamation from you however you don’t lean away and rather you simply smile widely. 

“You gotta stop apologizing kid” Nick scolds gently with a small shake of the head. You smile innocently at the boy and lean into his palm when he begins to card his fingers through your hair. “I'm gonna give Remi a text, alright?”

You eagerly nod your head and look up at Nick through your lashes, the large smile on your lips not faltering. As you quietly watch the male type away on his phone, you begin to feel the excitement build up inside you. If ‘T’ was just as good as Kit said it'd be, you could kiss all of your dysphoria away and finally live a worry-free life. You would finally be happy if everything worked out like you hoped it would.

You wouldn't have to spend hours upon hours on the bathroom floor spiraling and sobbing about your appearance and wouldn't have to feel the need to hide out in your and Nick’s place. You'd be content with your life and God knew you were in desperate need of some happiness in your life. 

_______

TIME SKIP

It's been about three and a half months since you've been taking testosterone. It took about a week to see results but when you started to see some bodily changes, you were over the moon. The first change you took notice of was your skin texture. Your skin started to become very oily and thick and you had to make a few changes in your skincare routine to help fix it. Nothing too major.

The next change was your odor. Now, you were plenty aware of males carrying a natural and unpleasant scent but you weren't quite prepared to develop it yourself. When you noticed this, you made sure to change your cologne to a stronger smelling one in hopes of making your newfound ‘stench.’

The next change, which was the one you were looking forward to the most, was your voice. You slowly but surely started to develop a deeper voice as you continued to take your dosages. When this change started occurring, you felt as though you were going through puberty again. (Which was fine by you. If it took you going through puberty a hundred more times just to pass and get rid of your dysphoria, you were more than willing to do it.)

As your voice started to change, the number of voice cracks you developed was embarrassing, to say the least. When Nick took notice of this, the usual teasing he did seemed to increase significantly. 

EXHIBIT A

You silently watched some supernatural series you stumbled upon on your TikTok feed as you lay down on the sofa at Nick’s place. The Sturniolo household was awfully quiet with both Matt and Chris being out with their friends. This ultimately left you and Nick to do whatever y'all want without being interrupted by the two males, You were so absorbed in the show that played rather loudly on your phone that you failed to notice Nick walk downstairs and enter the living room.

Noticing that you weren't aware of his presence yet, the male quietly made his way over to you. Upon arriving at the sofa where your frame lay comfortably, he peered over the back of the sofa to make sure he wasn't in your line of sight before loudly shouting and grabbing both of your arms. At the sudden exclamation, you scream loudly, your voice cracking in the progress, and you soon find yourself stumbling off the sofa and falling to the floor. 

The moment your back collides with the floorboards with a soft thud, the sound of Nick’s loud laughter runs through your ears. 

“You sound like a fucking elementary school boy!” Nick exclaims through hard laughter. As you boost yourself up into a sitting position, you roll your eyes. The moment you shift your gaze up, you watch Nick stumble around the sofa and walk up to you, soft giggles still escaping his lips. The moment he takes in the harsh glare you're sending him, he begins laughing hard again. 

“Nick.. It's never that funny.” You grumble, your voice low as you try to bite back the smile threatening to creep onto your lips. 

“It's so funny!” As you sigh heavily, Nick falls to the floor as more laughs rack his body. 

“I can't with you.” You boost yourself up to your feet and leave the living room to go to the kitchen, leaving Nick laughing his heart out on the floor in the living room. 

You were hoping that these voice cracks of yours would decrease the more that took testosterone but that was the least of your concerns at this point. The final change you took notice of (as of right now) was the muscle building up on your arms. Your once-thin limbs started to gain quite a few muscles as you continued to take the medication and you didn't have to do very much to keep it up.

You were quite happy with the sleeper build you had going on considering how you always wanted one but you wanted to attempt to build more muscle. When you began to work on your physique, Nick immediately took notice of it. 

A cold shiver ran down your spine as you stood in front of Nick’s front door. The winter wind was harshly hitting your face and the only thing that covered your body and provided you with a little warmth was the hoodie loosely hugging your frame. You would let yourself in the house however you left the spare key Nick gave you in his room. As you shut your eyes and heavily exhale, the sound of the door unlocking rings through your ears. Upon the door opening with a soft creek, you open your eyes and you’re immediately greeted by Nick who has a large blanket tucked around him. 

“What the hell are you doing in sweatpants and a hoodie?” Nick asks as he narrows his eyes at you. 

“This is all I had in my closet. Everything else was in the washer or dryer.” You reply with a frown. Nick huffs softly and grabs your bicep to pull you inside, the warm air filling the house immediately drawing a content sigh from your lips. “God, it feels amazing in here.” 

As you turn around to face Nick, a bewildered expression paints your features at the sight of the male intently staring at your arm, specifically the area he is currently grasping. 

“You good? Do I have something on me?” 

“No, no, you don't have anything on you.” 

“Then what's wrong?”

Silence drifts between the two of you as Nick continues to wordlessly stare at your arm. Feeling rather uneasy with the silence, you open your mouth to say something however are interrupted by Nick saying, “Did you start working out?” 

 Your face immediately flushes as Nick finally shifts his gaze up to you. After locking eyes with the boy, you slowly nod your head and reply, “Yeah.”

“SINCE WHEN?? LOOK AT YOUR FUCKING ARMS!”

You hold back a chuckle when Nick begins to feel your bicep, his eyes wide in pure shock. “Since like last week. As much as I liked my sleeper build I had to work on my physique a little more.”

“Holy fuck y/n…” Nick mutters under his breath as he takes his other hand and begins to squeeze your other arm. As the male continues his actions, you can't help but notice the subtle shade of blush dusting over the tips of his ears and cheeks. Your eyebrows furrow slightly at the sight and a mischievous smile soon overtakes your lips as you continue to gaze at the boy. 

“You know what else I've been working on?

“What?” When you gently grasp Nick’s wrist and remove it from your bicep, he silently watches as you rest his palm on your stomach. The moment you set his hand against your clothed torso, his face flushes a deep red color, followed by his eyes widening. You can't help but laugh at the sight of the hard blushing boy in front of you and you pull his hand away as you double over in laughter.

“You want me dead, don't you?” Nick mumbles, his free hand quickly coming up to cover his face. 

“Maybe.” As you stand upright again, you send Nick a teasing smile before you grab the back of his neck and pull him in for a kiss, the feeling of the male melting into the affection bringing a small smile to your lips. 

Since you were only a few months into taking testosterone, you knew that you would experience more changes. Remi, the doctor that Kit suggested you see, filled you in on what those changes would be and when you would most likely experience each of them. They were very supportive on your entire journey of being on ‘T’ and didn’t hesitate to answer any questions that you have regarding it.

When you were beginning to run out of gel, (they suggested you take this type of testosterone considering your great fear of needles. You tried to take it through the injections but even with Nick’s help, it never went well.) you immediately notified them and they sent you another dosage.

Kit was also very supportive and encouraging during this whole process. He often texted you every week or so to ask how you were holding up and such. When you told him about the changes you were experiencing or if he caught onto them himself, he showed a lot of excitement for you. 

The most encouraging person however was obviously Nick. He always reminded you to apply your gel if it slipped your mind and often suggested that he put it on you himself. Every time you notice a subtle change in your body, you don’t hesitate to call the boy and inform him of it. At times, you felt as though he was more excited by your accomplishments than you were.

Every time you came over and your voice had gone through a slight change or you were starting to gain a little more height, he would be smiling widely and devouring you in pecks all over your face. (This would often lead to a small make-out session in his room but no one’s gotta know that) He was always so happy for you and showed you nothing but love and support and you would be forever grateful for him. 

You were plenty aware of the fact that your journey as a trans male was far from over however you knew that Nick would be by your side every step of the way. 

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:· TagList ·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

@freshloveforthefit @thenickgirl @patscorner @frankdelreyy @sturnsann @kileybankzz @robins-scoop @miloisdone1 @rootbeerworshiper @rubyperic-09 @teenagetrash00 @maryx2xx

[notdysfunk]

So about Left 4 Freddy!

I wanna talk about each of the infected, because we had /everyone/ modded.

l4d2 cast is Sun, Moon, Roxy, Freddy. l4d cast is Freddy, Bonnie, Chica, Foxy Jimmy Gibs Jr. is Golden Freddy

All 'normal infected' are Various Staffbots Hunter is Sun/Moon also Jockey is BB Spitter is Mangle Smoker is Ennard Boomer is Mascot Mimic Charger is Withered Bonnie Tank is Monty Witch is Vanny INFO DUMP AND IMAGES BELOW THE BREAK!!!!!!!

The original cast, Freddy, Chica, Bonnie, and Foxy; I ALSO headcanon these 4 to be the Midnight Riders(RENAMED TO The Midnight Motorists)(lol) So the Midnight Motorists are the original cast, and the L4F2 cast look up to them, which makes meeting them in The Passing so much sweeter. However, the only one of the four who doesn't make it to The Passing is Foxy, this is because he was the most withered of the main four, and just didnt make it. (his modded char is deceased) As for the infected, they're all staffbots because honestly it's just funny. The AU /maybe/ has normal humans? Staffbots can work too. Tank is Monty, however these Montys are from OTHER pizzaplexes. ON that note, Hunters are too. Hunters during the day are Sun, and during the night they are Moon. These are NOT our sun and moon- but S/Ms from other plexs. However, this makes it hard for Sun and Moon to kill these infected- since they resemble so much of them. Jockey as BB is so funny guys u dont understand HAHA Mangle, Ennard, Mascot Mimic, Withered Bonnie are all just random so dont think abt it too much HAHA Vanny being Witch is genuinely so cool!! If I can get a clip some time, I'll post it! She wonders around while crying; growling and even attacking when the crew gets too close. Most often during playing, Roxy was the one to set Vanny off and be attacked. So it's not a headcanon that Vanny as the witch has a tendency to target Roxy. Sun and Moon are most likely to be hit by Chargers(Withered Bonnies), because their lanky, towering figure does, in fact, make it hard to dodge them quickly. Freddy is most likely to get hooked by Smokers(Ennards) for some reason.

--- Other random dialogue thingz!! --- In the beginning of The Dark Carnival, after getting Jimmy's car in The Passing; Sun says that he'd like a minute alone with the car, as he really enjoyed being able to drive the stock car. Roxanne comments "I understand..." Quickly before going quiet. I like to think this is because Roxy used to be a racer. She understands the connection to a car- as silly as it is. Oftentimes, Coach called Rochelle "Ro" in dialogue. So they call Roxy "Ro" in L4F au as well. -Roxy nicknames: Ro (From all), Miss (Sun), Ma'am (Sun/Moon) -Sun nicknames: Boy (Freddy), Youngin (Also Freddy), Hon/Honey(Ro), Goober (Moon), Killer (Moon) -Moon nicknames: Moondrop (Freddy), Stars (Ro), -Freddy nicknames: Sir (Sun), Fred (All), Mr. Pizza (Moon) Sun and Moon's relationship is pretty goofy. Typically peaceful banter betweeen the two ensues! Example of their modded character's dialogues LOL:

--- Moon is jokingly flirtatious, he's coping... dont @ him ok He's also a total man baby during the sewer area. Sun is a complete goober, rambling and bantering with the crew. For some reason he's also a hopeless romantic towards roxy but like it's also just him being kinda dumb Freddy has taken on a very fatherly role calling to the others so much as "youngin". He also often gives a screaming ovation after making it through an area successfully. Roxy is pretty cocky towards the infected, saying stuff like "I'll give that bitch a reason to cry." In regards to the witch. However, she's sweet and refers to many in her team so much as "sweetheart" or "hon".

Okay /end rant i promie

[monakisu]

my first photoshop animation EVER for my graphic design class!! :D i did the Virgin Mary & Jesus Christ <3

we were tasked with creating digital collages in line with the style of the Dada Movement which i will Not explain because i've already forgotten everything about it beyond vague emotions! i didn't really know what to do for mine so i went sorta the Basic Route and just did the bible LMAOOO however i think i missed a memo of some sort? everybody else was doing kooky fun fever dream things and mine was just... a downer......

this is abt mary and jesus and how bonkers insane it is to give birth to and raise a kid who you know is destined to Die For Humanity and how bonkers insane it is to be that kid. it makes me feel bad for mary!! and jesus especially!!!

to me, jesus is like fluttershy from MLP. that doesn't make sense. but i like this dude loads! he's endlessly kind!! hearing about how he gets bullied throughout the bible always made me :( for him... he felt very lonely! everybody dunked on him, his own hometown hated his guts, and even his own disciples didn't fully get him (like that one time he gave them literally One Thing to do and they just conked out on the spot. great job guys.)

i felt the absolute worst for him when he was up on that mountain (i forgot which) praying so hard he was sweating BLOOD in desperation for his dad to "pass on this cup" (ie. the burden of a martyr ie.ie. DYING) which showed how he didn't just smoothly selflessly accept his fate!! he was scared!!! and then he gets thrashed around and pinned up on a cross and dies from asphyxiation due to the head becoming too heavy to be supported by the neck or just infection or starvation or whatever!!!!! poor fella :(

anyways. about the animation.

beginning ballet - dont know what to tell you. i really love ballet. ballerinas are hardcore!! the dancer is mary and her little lamb is jesus!

falling tears - those are mary's!

two-headed lamb - i also don't know about this one... thought it looked cool LOL could represent how the rest of the world treated jesus with disgust... i really winged this project wahahaha

saturn devouring his son - the casual objectification of jesus throughout the bible really unsettled me. it was made very clear that the dude was basically a tool? and the dude himself admits it multiple times! that's effed. anyways, god sacrificing his own son reminded me of this goya painting hahaha since it's also father and son! "devouring" the sacrificial lamb / using him up

applause - because jesus went through all this hullabaloo the rest of humanity gets to frolic on, even the people who hated and beefed with jesus. so the applause is sorta like people expressing thanks? some of them are very superficial, not very grateful.....

sorry if this is blasphemous HAHAHA i don't know much abt the lore besides my own opinions formed from a single year of highschool bible class and my childhood memories of obsessing over this walmart kid's adaptation of the entire bible...

but animation is surprisingly super ultra fun!!!!! i thought it would involve a lot more crying?! animators always seem sorta tortured to me!

[hikari-writes]

character: konoha akinori [haikyuu!!]

warning: none, just konoha comforting stressed out reader, comfort fluff

words: 1.7k

a/n: yes i am shamelessly promoting my "konoha akinori as the best housemate ever" agenda join my cult 🧍🧍🧍this is for @sugardaddyreo 's "The Home Collab" !!! i literally screamed when i saw the masterlist for this collab i cant believe i got a perfect opportunity to write abt roomie konoha my beloved aojdiwjdie so thank u so much for hosting!!! 🙏🙏 sorry this took a long time 😭😭but thanks to u i had lots of fun making it <3333 if im gonna be honest- i definitely ddint expect itd be this long ---

You didn't talk much with Konoha Akinori. Not that you didn't want to, but it's more because of your clashing schedules. It's weird, considering the fact that you both share the same house, yet you can count with only two hands the number of times you have spoken to him.

Komi had been the one to introduce you to Konoha during your search for a house. 

"He could use a roommate or two to divide the house rent with," your friend grinned and you considered that it's not such a bad option. You had never met this Konoha guy before but if he's a best friend of Komi, you figured that he's gotta be a pretty decent person. 

And you were right. Well, sort of. You just assumed he was since you never had much interaction with him in the first place, even after 3 months of living together. You hate to admit it, but even after such a long time had passed, you barely knew anything about him besides his name. To say you two regarded each other as ghosts in your own house would sound like an overstatement, but it's sort of true.

With all that said, why was that Konoha Akinori holding your head against his chest, letting it rest there, while gently patting your back? 

Let me take you back to a few hours prior to this.

That week had been awful for you. Extremely awful. All you wanted to do after leaving your workplace was to curl up in your bed, and probably cry yourself to sleep. That’s all. But even dragging your body to your bedroom was too much of a work, so instead you settled on lying down on the living room sofa. Did you care that your housemate’s probably gonna see you in your miserable state out in the open? No, rather, you’d thought that he’s going to pretend like he didn’t see it. After all, it’s not as if you guys were close enough for him to inquire about your wellbeing.

You heard the creaking noise of your shared apartment’s door opening. Your face still buried deep into the sofa cushion, you ignored it. ‘He’s home much earlier today,’ you thought to yourself. As expected, you didn’t hear anything afterwards, and you assumed he’d made his way into his bedroom. But when you felt a presence sitting down beside the sofa, you came to the realisation that maybe your assumption had been wrong after all. 

A few seconds passed by with no words exchanged between you two. It made you think that maybe you were just imagining things and Konoha wasn’t really there besides you. Not too long after that however, he spoke up.

“Hey…are you alright?”

You could’ve just said yes and let him leave. You could’ve just made up an excuse on the spot, it’s really not that hard. Why would you need to confide in him when he’s just a stranger you’re sharing your living space with? But as soon as he asked that, a million different emotions washed over you in an instant. It’s a simple, and not to mention an overused question, but maybe that’s just what you needed at the moment. You couldn’t help the sob that escaped you. He wrapped his arms around your shaking figure, silently comforting you. At that moment, your soft weeping was the only thing echoing throughout the room.

And so, that was what led you to this point. He allowed your head to rest comfortably on his chest while he listened to whatever your problems had been. He was a good listener, and even offered encouraging words to help lift up your spirit. You never expected that, and you must admit that you were impressed. 

“Oh right, I almost forgot,” Konoha gently rose up from his seat after he was done talking, and it took all of your willpower to not stop him from leaving your side. Your eyes curiously followed him to the kitchen. He took out a tub of ice cream from the fridge, one that just happened to be your favourite flavour. After he took a couple of spoons from the cupboard, he made his way back to the living room where you were with a grin.   

“Thought this might help. It’s your favourite, right?”

You simply blinked at him, stunned. 

“How did you know that?”

“We’ve lived in the same apartment for months now, I think I would at least be able to notice this much,” his reply was nonchalant, but it made you feel a bit guilty since you never noticed anything about him. ‘Maybe he’s just really observant…or I’m the one who’s too ignorant of my own surroundings,’ you silently concluded. 

You took a spoonful of the ice cream, followed by Konoha, and could feel your heart lightening up just a little at the coolness of the dessert. Konoha began to reach for the tv remote and switched it on, going through a selection of shows that you both could enjoy together. You turned to him when a question popped up in your mind.

“I’ve never seen this one in the fridge before. Did you just buy it?”

He looked surprised by that question, and it took him a moment to reply to it. He coughed once, as if he’s trying to cover up his increasingly red cheeks.

“Well…yeah. Uh…It’s just…I noticed that this week you looked extremely tired. I thought that maybe buying you your favourite ice cream could help make you feel better so… I picked it up on my way home just now.” 

He looked away, embarrassed at his own confession. Either he’s really observant, just as you’d concluded earlier, or your fatigue and stress were that visible. Either way, you felt your heart swelled at his thoughtfulness. You choked back another sob before softly whispering a thank you. You weren’t sure whether he heard that or not, but from the corner of your eyes, you could see him turning his face back towards you and his hands softly placed atop your head.

A few more minutes passed by, and you could feel yourself calming down from the earlier outburst. With the ice cream tub in your hand and shoulder leaned against Konoha’s, you both continued to watch the show on the tv in silence, minus the occasional funny commentary you both gave towards the characters in the show. 

Despite the energy it took off of you for all that crying, your eyes didn’t feel quite sleepy yet. There was still something on your mind. You glanced at Konoha. He didn’t look like he’s about to fall asleep anytime soon either. 

“Hey, Konoha?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m..sorry.”

He looked at you with a puzzled look, so you continued.

“For burdening you with my problems even though we’ve barely even talked before. And speaking of that, I’m sorry for not trying harder to close the gap between us….even though we’re supposed to be housemates and all.”

Konoha looked contemplative for a moment before giving you a playful grin.

“If that’s the case, why don’t we start over then,” he replied with an outstretched hand.

“The name’s Konoha Akinori. I'm 24 years old and I work as an employee at a pharmaceutical company. I’ll be in your care from now on, roomie.”

You had to process his words for a moment before taking his outstretched hand in yours, shaking it.

“Same here…roomie.”

Your reply came with a grateful smile that graced your lips. It was the first time he’d seen that bright of a smile from you. He could feel the heavy weight in his chest lightening up. He'd been worried for you ever since he first noticed how distressed you were. Now that he finally saw the genuine smile on your face, he felt relief washed over his entire body and he found himself smiling alongside you.

"If anything ever gets too much for you, well…just know that I'm always here to help. Don’t shoulder them all by yourself.”

He ruffled your hair, messing it up even more than it already was, before standing up from the sofa.

“You should go to bed. It’s late already,” he suggested, eyes still on you. You were about to nod at his suggestion when he grinned cheekily. 

“Or if you’re having trouble sleeping, I can help lull you to sleep.”

‘...this little shit.’

You narrowed your eyes at him and racked your brain to come up with a snarky comeback. You stopped yourself when you came to a sudden conclusion.

“Sure.”

“What?”

“I’d love for you to sing me a lullaby. I do wonder what kind of angelic voice you have.”

It was your turn to tease him and his eyebrows squeezed together into a frown. He turned his face away from you, but you could still see his slightly red ears. You then made your way into your bedroom, with Konoha silently following behind you.

It’s funny now that you think about it. Just a few months ago, you were struggling to hold a proper conversation with him. But now, after properly talking to him for the first time for only a couple hours, you could easily tease each other like you’ve known each other your whole life. Talking with Konoha wasn't as stifling as you had feared. The reason you were able to talk to him so casually was also thanks to him making the flow of the conversation so natural. At that moment, you genuinely admired your housemate as the man that he is.

You climbed up onto your bed while Konoha took a nearby chair in your room and placed it at your bedside.

“So you’re actually going to sing me a lullaby?”

“Shaddup.”

He gently slapped a hand on your face, covering your eyes, before heaving a sigh and started singing. It was a gentle tune, and paired with his voice, it didn’t take you long to fall into a deep slumber. 

Once he saw your steady breathing, he stopped and took his hand off of your face. With his chin resting on his palm, he stared absentmindedly at your sleeping figure.

‘Did I just earn myself a housemate or a kid to babysit?’ He wondered to himself, gently scoffing at his own question. Right before he walked himself out of your room, he turned his head one last time and smiled.

“Sweet dreams, y/n.”

[milogreer]

Grah (Milo 🥺🥺) ('send me a character' ask game!)

@darlinghowl asked: milo too!

YAAYYY HUSBAND TIME 🩷🩷 ↳ send me a character!

My first impression: i’m being so so serious when i say i had to pause milo’s first audio pretty much immediately after he started talking because his accent made me blush LMFAO it’s like he was built for me in a fuckin lab. werewolf with a ny/nj accent, the cockiness and bitchiness with just that hint of a soft side near the end when he talks about wanting dahlia to stay safe, and the FLIRTINESS my god. and that was ONE AUDIO LMAO that’s not even getting into everything else he has going on that felt tailored to me (*cough*heatingupinthebedroom*cough*) 🫠💖 

My impression now: unchanged baby he has been my number one since day one!!! not that this is surprising to anyone given my blog theme 🤣 i may not talk about him all the time but he’s never losing top spot in my heart. i’ve gotten butterflies from a handful of moments across the redactedverse but nothing that stuck with me as hard as the panic attack audio did, and he still makes me kick my feet and twirl my hair whenever he gets all sweet 💘 he’s truly the redacted love of my life

A favorite thing: as a massive horror media enjoyer, i think it’s so cute that he’s a little scaredy cat when it comes to ghosts and demons. the gameplay vids are super immersive for me bc whenever he jumps at something i start giggling and then he tells sweetheart to shut up for also giggling LMAO 

Least favorite thing: nothing. he’s the most perfect man ever. actually no least favorite thing is that he doesn’t talk abt his family enough !! i wanna know more about his family life so badly after the “worried about you” audio 😫 i wanna know more about marie other than that she likes ghostbusters and nags his ear off when he gets himself hurt and i wanna really dig into his feelings for his previously alcoholic/gambling addict father

Favorite interaction they have with another: AHHH THE ASHER MOUNTAIN INCIDENT. ok ok i’ve talked abt this before but i’m gonna say it again bc it always bears repeating. this was i think the first time we’ve heard about him shifting after regaining the ability post-inversion and it made me actually cry bc it was just two best friends having stupid fun together as shifters 😭😭 like even though milo came out of it injured he still got to wolf out and fuck around with asher and that makes me sooo happy for him after suffering through those 5-6 months being unable to shift

A character that I wish they would interact with more: DARLIN PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE erik i’m on my knees!!! darlin’s gotten audios with david and asher, when will it be milo’s turn!! i’ve thought a lot about them as teens and how they got on and how they navigated being sort of the odd ones out wrt their family dynamics vs david and asher’s + how the pack meeting with darlin went ☹️ i need them to get a one on one audio

A headcanon: aggro is a black cat that milo adopted from a shelter specifically because of the stigma surrounding black cats. people think they’re unlucky or evil or whatever but aggro is the sweetest little thing and he was just a little baby who had been there for probably a month or two and when milo came around, there was an instant connection 🥺 i also think that if he wasn’t already a registered ESA then they definitely would’ve gotten it done post-inversion. milo doesn’t typically take him anywhere but sometimes sweetheart will take him with them to the office; he even has a cute little ESA vest 🥰

A song: this is so hard because i have a handful of good ones… one i don’t think i’ve posted before is just what i needed by the cars! really early relationship vibes, i like it a lot 💕

An unpopular opinion: [looks around cautiously before leaning close to the mic and whispering] i don’t think he’s into being called daddy. MAYBE I’M BIASED because i don’t usually vibe with it myself, but i just don’t see it. however i think if you called him “sir” you’d both be locked up in the bedroom for several hours 🤷🏼‍♀️

[hinamie]

ok i have composed myself i have transcribed the lyrics for wish you were here as best as i could. i am going to listen to this and only this until i lose interest or the ability to hear, whichever happens first

this song is SUCH a bop the soft guitar intro in2 the main beat is so good but can we TALK . about how . HE STARTS IT WITH A "MWAH" WHAT A FUCKING ICON I LOVE HIM I LOVE THEMMMMM the percussion is so good i love the soft offbeat claps in th bg they add such a nice lil pep n especially in verse 2 after "love you even if you hate my guts" they add like 4 extra clap beats and i am !!!!!!! ASCENDING

verse 1 is iconic i love the line "pack up my head might mail it back to your house" its so fucking funny it reminds me of that post thts like "i didn't know how to deal with the fact that i had a crush so i wrote her a note that said get out of my school" . but listenok listen. verse 2 is the one they posted a snippet of last year and first of all i love the electric-y/tv-turning off/guitar slide/quiet video game laser effect as the vocals start it makes my brain buzz aNYWAY this verse is my favourite between the two and has absolutely s tier lines such as "as long as you think of me I don't care what" and "love you even if you hate my guts" PLUS the lil clappy bits i mentioned they r so GOOD. not to mention his voice pls.,,, he sounds so good when he belts,,, his voice has a slight rasp to it that they lean into with the slightly muffled old speaker sound god he sounds so good all the TIME his vocals are so clear when he hangs on the words "singing" and "myself" into the chorus PLS. also the bg vocal 'a t-t-t-touch too sentimental' is so gd CATCHY

speaking of the chorus oh my god the CHORUS. the desperate cry of "don't you miss me? / don't you want me around?" is so devastating and heartfelt head in HANDS also the lyrics . im so excited abt them i cannot put into words how !!!!!!!! they make me just. gestures helplessly

wishful thinking is all that’s holding me down  lost on a blue moon  i wish you were here right now

in chorus 2 especially the way the beat cuts out after "lost on a blue moon" n comes back after "I wish you were here"??? AUDIBLE SEROTONIN TO ME ((plus in the final chorus changing the "lost on a blue moon" to "not like you used to" ??????? OW ???????????? that had a lil kick that got me a bit.. , being stuck with ur own wishful thinking as a stand-in for the physical affection of the person u like,,, ....fushiguro touch starved megu- *is shot dead*)))

HOWEVER the absolute lyrical Backbone of this song is the fucking bridge. i knew it would be i heard the snippet ages ago and i was like holy shit these lyrics go hard what are they from only to b dismayed to find that whatever song they were from did not yet exist. but now it DOES and i can listen to the way the bridge sounds like lights dimming. like headlights passing through a hazy window. it sounds like clouds parting

nobody else in this life or next  will ever have me the way that you do nothing in hell, heaven, earth, or the rest could ever take me away from you

THAT FUCKING EMOTIONAL BOMBSHELL against the original soft guitar from the intro drop the drums just reverb-y lyrics and background vocals and some of the most romantic fucking lyrics i've had the pleasure of reading let alone hearing one of my favourite artists sing.

i am going to once again fuse my fv brainrot with my megumi brainrot. realistically ik this is probably a missing your ex song but i do not care. this is a longing megumi song to me i dont CARE argue with a WALL (said to no one). the verses and chorus are pine-y and a bit snarky n very i like-like you and don't know what to do with how much i miss you. it's wry and frustrated n just tsundere enough but then u get to the bridge n there lies the sheer undying devotION god im unweLL this is all i'm going to listen to. this was worth waiting a year for if this is part of a new album they have in production im actually going to die

[homeless202]

I’m new here and I absolutely love your type of blogs with analysis and meta and long texts~~

I was wondering—is Eunyung and Haejoon’s relationship the kind that could be interpreted as romantic?

first of all, welcome and ty! and sorry it took me so long to reply, i hope u're still around anon. now to answer ur question

i'll take this opportunity to share all my thoughts on the topic bc i have Many.

TLDR: it is possible to read it as romantic if you really want to, but it's not meant to (at least not as of right now in the story aka ch.224)

deep dive under the cut as to why

-> can Eunyung and Haejoon’s relationship be interpreted as romantic?

i like how you phrased that bc, the thing is, interpretation is very subjective. you're welcome and allowed to interpret things however you want, but in EY&HJ's case, i feel like you'd have to work a lil extra hard to get to that point.

-> is Eunyung and Haejoon’s relationship meant to be interpreted as romantic?

this one's easy bc no. objectively Not. the genre of No Home is drama and slice of life (and once upon a time, horror). even if they were to ever end up in a romantic relationship, that's not what the story is about.

when i ask myself what the author's intention is with this story, i'd say it's to (realistically) portray how a young person with trauma would navigate another young person's trauma. and showing how easy it is to unintentionally fuck it up for various reasons: lacking context as to what exactly said trauma is, generally not knowing how to navigate it, their own trauma getting in the way, lacking the necessary resources. take your pick.

think of it like "how should i carry someone else's baggage when i have my own to deal with?" while also keeping in mind they're kids; they often don't have enough experience to know how to help, and even when they know what the right thing to do is, they're not old enough to take (legal) action.

and especially, the most heart-breaking yet realistic thing, when you're just getting to know someone, you can't know everything about them. it's so easy to accidentally do or say sth that cuts or offends when it wasn't meant to. but when they've got their own issues, it's hard not to take it personally (eg. EY talking about HJ's parents without knowing his mom died not long ago in the beginning of the story).

-> what even is Eunyung and Haejoon’s relationship??

this one's so funny bc i have no idea how to answer and i'm convinced not even EY and HJ themselves would know how to answer. they're not really friends; they got off on the wrong foot and kept walking with two left feet way too much to call themselves friends. the things that pushed them together the most were the dorms (not anymore) and the same friend group (more or less since EY has multiple).

what fits them best i'd say is "the universe forced us together against our will and now we're stuck with one another altho we hate each other" (<- at least in the beginning) extended with the "misery loves company" sentiment. finding comfort in someone who gets it, even tho they only kinda get it but not really but it works out anyway except it doesn't <- THERE'S NO NAME FOR THAT *cry* they invented a new type of character dynamic smh (i've never read a pairing with so much (romantic) potential only to see them completely fuck up their chance so royally by the end of their interaction EVERY SINGLE TIME. like yeah, enemies to lovers whatever BUT NOT TO THAT LEVEL HOLY SHIT)

they've changed each other, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. they're compatible in the way they understand each other on a deeper level and incompatible in the way they don't.

...however...

this is how HJ thinks of EY: (and also what No Home is truly abt)

and this is how EY feels about HJ after EY found out HJ used to steal as well (aka that HJ isn't perfect like the stuck up bitch EY thought he was at first):

so...

<- -> EY's first impression of HJ was that he was looking down on him and sth like "does this guy have ulterior motives? or is he just that naive being so trusting?" until EY found out HJ wasn't that different from him. after that, EY started admiring HJ for still managing to achieve things in life despite the hardships he had to go through. the type of admiration that can easily (and sometimes does) slip into envy.

-

since the beginning, EY has helped HJ (or at least tried to) without him knowing. sometimes it worked out, sometimes not. most times EY tried doing sth nice for HJ was (from EY's perspective) in return to HJ trying to help him or doing nice things for him (which, again, sometimes worked out, sometimes not). EY was just paying back a debt to "this stubborn naive guy who keeps getting into trouble and butting into his business. gotta look out for this idiot or he might get scammed." (<- eg. when EY offered to get HJ's money back from his uncle)

he doesn't do it for credit or friendship or out of obligation, he's just doing what he thinks is the right thing bc he doesn't want to owe anyone anything. he can't accept people just genuinely being kind, genuinely caring and genuinely wanting to help. but he's been learning and slowly coming to terms with it.

-

<- -> HJ first wanted to try befriending EY despite not liking him bc, well, the guy did steal his wallet and stab him in their first interaction. after trying and failing at it multiple times, thanksgiving happened, and HJ started thinking of EY as his underclassman bc he realized EY's just a kid with issues and he should keep an eye on him (discretely bc EY hates pity).

-

with time HJ has come to understand EY better by going after him whenever he ran off and slowly realized that EY does mean well and has his reasons (as fucked up as they might be sometimes). but his mentality abt EY is still "i gotta push him in the right direction cuz he's my underclassman and i unintentionally got attached to him (somehow??)" (also bc he knows EY already gave up on himself so he needs a lil help to find his way again. also also bc he knows EY is lowkey suicidal and he's scared it'll be his fault if sth happens) <- his care for EY comes from a protective/nurturing (/possibly maybe guilty) place which started when he realized EY was just a kid^^. in other words, HJ still bothers with EY out of a subconscious sense of responsibility/obligation in a way (a good way tho. or at least a way that gets better)

see, sth i struggle with is if HJ thinks he has to or wants to or thinks he should or can't just not help/care for EY. i can't exactly pinpoint where the sentiment is coming from. his face is too blank for me to read sometimes T_T

-

to summarize: HJ is EY's goal, what EY wishes he could've been. and EY is HJ's 'responsibility' so to speak (bc 'burden' doesn't quite fit since HJ is there for EY willingly) -> EY has a positive opinion of HJ while HJ has a neutral opinion of EY (which is also gradually getting better)

note1: i think HJ's intention (maybe subconsciously) was to be to EY what HJ's upperclassman was to him. aka someone who's there when you need it and can help guide you. it would explain why HJ kept chasing after EY despite not really having a reason to and EY repeatedly rejecting HJ's care/help.

note2: i also believe the 'upper-under-classman' relationship dynamic fits them the best atm bc it also matches the way the story often singles EY out as he's the only second year (aka younger) of the 6 MCs.

-> Romance in No Home?

another thing i should mention is that No Home rarely leaves things open for interpretation. the deepest arguments EY&HJ had were always spelled out for us, to make us understand exactly what the problem was, and how there isn't a good guy and a bad guy. it's just two people with issuesTM.

from what we've seen in the story up to this point, i couldn't pick out a moment where i'd go "here! that's romantic! that's the moment they realized SomeThing!" yk

when it comes to romance specifically, i feel like a handful of opportunities were missed. there are scenes which could've easily been written trough a rosy lens but simply weren't.

exhibit A:

HJ was speechless bc "wow this mf really is actively picking a fight with an authority figure. i gotta make sure things don't escalate" not bc "hoLY sHiT hE's PreTTy. all his fangirls are on to something". however, this only becomes more clear when you keep reading the next few chapters, so i understand how you could interpret it as the latter.

exhibit B:

here they got so close and the moment was so deep bc "woaa he said he believes me. no one's said to me that before!". unfortunately, EY was panicking too much for it to mean something bc of the guilt he felt for HJ trusting someone so undeserving of trust like EY.

exhibit C:

this is maybe the closest we got to romantic between these two. i think this might be the only (or at least first) ever deep interaction between them that didn't end in a fight or misunderstanding. is it meant to be romantic tho? -> ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-> what do i think?

first, full transparency: i went into reading this story fully expecting it to be a BL and for EY&HJ to end up together. but the more i kept on reading, the more i got the ick thinking about them being in a (romantic) relationship bc, at least from what we've seen so far in the story, their relationship would be so ToxicTM (which i personally don't enjoy reading).

as they are right now, i wouldn't want them to be together like that. like, honestly, you still can't really consider these two even friends; they just tolerate each other if the stars align correctly (altho, i'll admit, their relationship is gradually getting better!!). every big argument they had i thought "god, there's no coming back from that. i'd cut ties so quickly if was them wtf". i still don't know how they managed to keep on interacting, props to them ig.

there's a lot of unresolved issues between them. and a lot of resentment which would not bode well in a romantic relationship. the smallest argument would turn explosive and they'd be, at best, in an on&off type of relationship. they both have the power to break the other and neither would be afraid to use it. they have a lot of history together, which is not always pleasant, so if they ever were to go the romantic route, it would have to be a long way to go.

technically, i could see them in a romantic relationship if they both went to therapy first and talked out all the baggage they're carrying (both individual and shared). realistically tho, what i think will happen at the end of No Home is that either they never cross paths again after high school ends (which would absolutely break my heart Wanan pls don't), or they somehow (unintentionally) end up living together bc they both desperately needed a roommate to pay rent (which would be a hilarious fucking gag LMAO). just, HJ going to uni/work and EY doing his own thing (prolly an actor) while still cohabiting together; hanging out to watch a movie before bed <- (whether platonic or romantic being left up for interpretation)

<- -> in conclusion, from what we've seen up to this point, their relationship is mainly upper-under-classman; reluctant (maybe) friends who tolerate each other but also care (too) deeply. they've changed each other, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. in some ways they're compatible and in others they're not.

all this being said, their relationship is improving and romance between EY&HJ is not impossible, just rather unlikely imo. but, again, interpretation is subjective and u're welcome to read their relationship however you want.

[ihateapbiology]

good news

(Help this feels like the 1D fanfics 😭😭😭😭 but just roll with it lol.)

also kinda tw- kinda like some thoughts on religion/homophobia

You joked with your friends that your ex girlfriend had broken up with you two weeks before you were seeing Julien Baker to give you the “authentic experience.” You wouldn’t call yourself a super fan, you had found her through boygenius and just really connected with her music. Unfortunately you had been connecting a little too much with her music since your ex girlfriend had “realized she wasn’t queer” and that “God was calling her away from you.” You didn’t even feel mad just so sad. So you were ready to cry. You and your closest friends scanned in your tickets and meandered your ways to your seats. You were super close. You had wanted to look nice in case one of your friends wanted to post abt the concert and if your ex saw it…you wanted to look like you didn’t want to rot in bed. The concert was everything and more than you could’ve hoped for. Each chord resonated deeply within you, the lyrics hitting close to home. Her voice was raw, filled with an emotion that seemed to echo your own pain. Tears welled up in your eyes as you let the music wash over you. As you were crying you felt more emotions than you had let yourself feel in a while, your ex breaking up with you had unearthed some of your own religious wounds. Then you felt eyes on you, not one of your friends, you were mortified when you realized Julien was looking down at you. You briefly made eye contact before you looked away fast. The concert drew to a close and you and your friends started filing out. You quickly let them know you were heading to the bathroom.

The tears you had held back during the performance now flowed freely, a silent release of all the hurt you had been carrying, not worrying about how your friends would think.

“Hey,” a gentle voice broke through your sobs. You looked up, surprised to see Julien standing there, concern etched on her face. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah I just stubbed my toe really hard” you lie still sobbing.

She smiled a bit and walked next to you and sat. “Yeah did you stub your toe in the middle of my concert as well?” She says, making it known that she remembered the rather awkward eye contact you two had made.

“Alright you caught me.” You softly say. “People have said I’m good to talk to. If you want to.” She says.

You hesitated for a moment before nodding. She sat down beside you, her presence comforting. You found yourself opening up to her, sharing the pain of your recent breakup and how lost you felt. She listened intently, not interrupting, just offering a supportive presence.

When you finished, Julien placed a hand on your shoulder. “I’m so sorry you’re going through this. That..wow that situation literally sounds like what I’d write a song about. I want you to know that no matter what. No matter what a warped preaching of a religion built upon love says you are valid. What your ex did has nothing to do on you, nothing at all, no matter who she was with when she felt this she would’ve broken up with them. Just..allow yourself to feel you know.”

This unleashes more tears “thank you it was just so out of left field you know.”

You guys talk for a bit longer before she has to go finishing cleaning up stuff. “Hey do you live around here?” She asks.

“Yeah.”

“Well if you ever need someone to talk to about this I’m here..” she grabs a sharpie from her pants pocket and writes her number on your hand. “thank you that’s really sweet…you’re really sweet.” You shyly say.

She shrugs “I like helping gorgeous girls” by the look on her face she clearly didn’t mean to say all that much.

However you didn’t register that she had called you gorgeous until 3 hours later as you were watching TV and screamed to your friends.

Now the question remained…would you text that number…

[coreysconcepts]

hello again! i wanted 2 post abt one of my fav charas bc he rlly stood the test of time and is still mostly relevant to me until today TT that someone is heishin! he's my eight-tailed fox character bc i had to, ykyk? also the first 3 pics are old drawings of heishin, like at most a year ago? when i was still conceptualizing what kind of character he was gonna be. anyway he's sort of like the dorky himbo character who values family and friends very closely and is like, romantic when you least expect him to be... so T.T anyway i shall drop his lore and kit! his lore is quite long and pretty outdated too, since i've gotten new lore inputs for his region ever since writing this backstory, but i think his story in general about being once divine would be the same. his skills in the concept art above are also outdated, since his most recent kit is very different from what i drew before. anyway thats all and i hope whoever reads this enjoys heishin :] (dividers are from @saradika-graphics)

The Almost Divine A dark blue mist eclipses the bright, ever-sunny sky of Kamigami’s Divine Palace. Needing a reliable guardian to deal with this situation, the Divine Deities created many prototype creatures. The three things they looked for in their divine guard were blinding swiftness, penetrating attacks, and some sort of distraction mechanism whenever it was fighting in groups. Among their many prototypes, one stuck out like a sore thumb: a fox who had trouble operating how it’s supposed to operate. The gods ran some tests on it, but it never seemed to engage in battle, no matter how hard they try to. All it ever does is run away, even while having all the checkmarks ticked off. One of the gods thought that it might be lacking something it wants to fight for, and did his best to rewire its brain into wanting to fight for them. Still, no effect. It boggles them how they, divine and all-powerful deities, made something that they themselves can’t even control.

Seeing all their efforts go to waste, they ultimately decide to cast down this failed prototype to the mortal realm. The god of care and love was the last it would see in the Divine Castle, as she was also the first it saw. She wished their almost defender a happy and fulfilled life, wrapping it in cloth weaved from light itself before dropping it into the clouds below. As the fox fell further and further away from heaven, it slowly started to grow more tails than it is supposed to have. One… Two… Three… Up until eight tails. When it finally landed on a forest’s cold ground in the mortal land, its brilliant cloth was blinding even the light of the moon. A poor, infertile, farmer couple happened to be passing by from the city, coming back from a long day of selling their goods. The blinding object lit up their dark path, and they were caught by surprise. Deciding to see what the foreign object was, they made their way toward it. They heard the screams of a baby getting louder the more they got closer to it. Once they reached the light, they knelt on the ground and unwrapped the peculiar shining cloth to see a human child, crying uncontrollably. Just then, eight tiny blue spirits pranced out of the cloth and twirled in the air, nodding to the couple before vanishing into thin air. They then quickly wrap the child in their arms, comforting it in their arms. They decided to name the infant Heishin after seeing the spirits from earlier.

As a young boy, Heishin was noticeably different from his playmates: he was extraordinarily fast— just a tad bit faster than a cat running, marks left on tree barks where he’d climb would be deeper than scratches and was charmingly persuading unbeknownst even to him. His parents were aware of this too, but thought he might just be “special” and dismissed the strange happenings. However, they were astounded when he had an appetite for liver. There were even times when if they wouldn’t cook him liver, he’d go out and ask their neighbors in the village for his favorite dish. As he grew older, he became odder and odder: most remarkably, his lower back started growing a small bump, and two sections of his hair started growing upwards, resembling that of a feline’s ear. One night, as Heishin was sleeping, his parents came home late from selling their goods at the market square. When they opened their bedroom door, they discovered a long protrusion coming from his slumbering body, which was wrapped in a small blanket and had its back facing them. Under the influence of curiosity and fear, they slowly crept towards him, pulling his blanket ever so slightly. Greeting them were not one, two, three, but eight fuzzy, snow-white tails. Their sudden shrieks caused Heishin to wake up, joining them in concerning revelation.

Reluctantly wanting to learn more about his past, he tags along with his parents to the city the next day and visits a library, covered in a cloak hiding his unique attributes. He impatiently goes through scrolls and flips through books until he comes upon the divine Nine-Tailed Fox. Written by a famous scholar in Kogoshi, the book “Creatures of Light” states that a ravaging eclipse is fated to come every one thousand years. This eclipse would bring with it famine, high tides, and blocks sunlight until it passes. To address this, the divine creates spirit guardians to aid the mortals and help them defend their paradise. One of the guardians who were different from the others was the Nine-Tailed Fox, who could traverse both the mortal and divine realm. It uses its powerful abilities in defending the Divine Castle, while also being able to relay important messages from heaven to humans. The book also adds that the Nine-Tailed Fox has only been seen once a thousand years ago, when a farmer’s livestock was found dead, and their livers missing. Heishin treks to his parent’s market stall determined to share his newfound knowledge. The situation did not sink in with his parents yet, but they reassured him that they still love him whatever his background.

A few days pass by, and Heishin makes his way home after running errands in the market square. It was quite a lengthy walk, even for him. The moon, though eerily having a shadow, was already in the sky when he was homebound. From afar, he noticed that the door to their native farmhouse was open. He found this weird, as it would always be closed, whether anyone was home or not. He also did not see his mother cooking their dinner outside, and their livestock was all over the place. He rushed to their open house and saw their things littered all over the floor. He crept into their bedroom to see his parents shivering in a corner. An ominous man stands tall with a knife in his hand, just about to take their lives. In the doorway, Heishin’s eyes glow yellow. His tails unfurl, lighting up. Blue flames summon all around him. In the blink of an eye, he stabs the man with his fire.

As the man falls, his parents rush to hug him. They share a short affirming conversation before Heishin hears more footsteps outside. He peered outside to see a group of shadowy figures hiding in the darkness surrounding their house, with only their glowing orange eyes making their presence known. He tightly hugs his parents before telling them to hide somewhere in the house. He then jumps out the window, channeling his inner power. For the first time since his past life in the Divine Palace, he transforms into the mighty Eight-Tailed Fox. As his tails started glowing pink, he blindingly jumped from place to place and dazed the shadow figures— up in the trees, behind the trees, down on the ground, and on the roof of their house. He jumps from enemy to enemy one more time, this time swiftly leaving deep, glowing blue scratches on their human body. Then, he stops to take some breaths. He lets out a deafening howl, exploding the scratches. As his enemies fall and disappear into shadow, he transforms back into a human and rushes to find his family. In a hidden trapdoor on the living area’s ground, Heishin helps them get up. They tear up as they hug him and thank him for defending their home. Heishin still feels uneasy even after defeating the enemies and remembered how the moon looked. He quickly goes out and looks at the sky, and his thoughts were right.

Up in the empty night sky, the moon itself was eclipsed by a darker force. Heishin knew this eclipse would be tremendously more dangerous than the previous eclipses thousands of years ago. With a heavy sigh and one last hug, he tells his parents to look for a new home in the city.

“What about you?” his father asks.

“I’ll be just here, in the forest, fighting off any evil that might come to harm you,” he speaks with a soft smile.

They bid their farewells as Heishin secretly sends off a small fox spirit to watch over them. Breathing deeply, he transforms into a fox and runs off into the unlit night. The fight has just begun, and Heishin wants to make sure he’s his family’s first line of defense.

kit: Q (Mesmerizing Flames) - (passive) Every three attacks, Heishin spins around and deals damage to all enemies he hits. - (active) Heishin sends blue flames to a cone-shaped, medium-ranged direction, dealing damage to all enemies hit and burns them for 3.5 seconds. W (Exploring the Open World) - - Heishin launches himself forward and transforms into his fox form for 8 seconds, gaining a burst of decaying movement speed. Heishin can recast this skill to launch himself in the air before landing on an area, dealing damage to all enemies hit. The damage from recasting this skill affects towers, and immediately destroys towers with 10% or less HP. E (Simulation of Life) - (passive) Increases healing received. - (active) Heishin plants a rice seed on the ground. After 5 seconds, the rice can be harvested to heal the player that harvested it. The ground where the rice seed was initially planted will keep growing harvestable rice seeds until an enemy unit destroys it through basic attacking. Heishin can interact with the destroyed ground to make it fertile again. R (Divine Intervention) - Heishin leaps to an enemy in fox form, charming them for a few seconds. When recast, dashes to a direction and deal massive damage to all enemies hit. Enemies whose HP drops below 4% from this skill will be executed.

[77ngiez-archive]

i am oh so curious about yteh :0 if you don’t mind me asking, what are some of the roleswaps for the main cast? :)

OMG YOU THANK YOU FOR ASKING IVE BEEN WANTING TO RAMBLE ABT IT FOR SO LONG

emiri and sara swap michiru and joe swap sei and kai swap anzu and kanna swap kurumada and kugie swap ranmaru and gin swap hayasaka and mishima swap mai and nao swap real hinako and alice swap sou and shin swap qtaro and reko swap keiji and megumi swap maple and meister swap

i’ll elaborate under the cut so that i. dont clog up ppls dashboards.

emiri and sara swap - woo emiri becomes the protagonist and sara becomes the laughing doll! not too much to say about it (lying)

emiri still has sara’s high survival rate, but sou’s not really that concerned about survival rates as much as he is about candidates/non-candidates, so he has less of a Weird Thing about her than shin does about sara. emiri is a lot grumpier than sara, especially after losing michiru. the main people she directs this grumpiness at are sou and megumi - especially megumi post-chapter one, since she blames her for revealing that michiru had the sacrifice. their relationship finally starts healing up at the end of chapter 2, though. emiri’s reaction to the hallucinations is slightly different from sara’s, but it’s still very unsettling.

as for sara, her floormaster name is gi rinny, a pun on "grinny"! ironically she doesn’t smile or laugh very much - she doesn’t take nearly as much pleasure in the role as miley does. like how in canon emiri was recruited because of her fiance, sara here was recruited because of joe (and to a lesser extent ryoko). asunaro had both of her friends under their thumb, and try as she might the only way to stop asunaro from hurting them was to join them. she’s been with asunaro for a few years now (they got her and joe when they were 15), and helped a lot in creating "kai", so she’s very attached to him! they’re kinda like siblings ehe

michiru and joe swap - michiru pulls the sacrifice card and dies, joe becomes the crying doll.

michiru as a support isn’t too different from joe, all things considered. it’s true that she is a bit more… not weak-willed, but more emotional perhaps? she’s a lot less openly distrusting than joe was, and mostly confides those feelings in emiri. however, while joe was only a little bit suspicious of keiji, michiru DOES NOT trust megumi’s ass. she’s also a lot more earnest in trying to escape with emiri than joe was - both of them are to be honest, they just get attached less easily than joe and sara did. before michiru’s death, she says my own spin on that one line - "i-it’s kind of hard for two girls to say things like this to each other, b-but—! i-i love you, emiri! you’re my best friend!" if you’re thinking this may be gay, you are correct.

joe’s floormastersona is tiad ropp, a pun on "teardrop". he’s even more sympathetic to the participants than safalin, and actively tries to help them out in the most inconspicuous ways possible. he’s still a bit crazy though (cut to the scene with the michiru doll and emiri). like sara, he’s also pretty close to "kai"! they bicker a lot but in the end they care about each other a lot. in this au, joe also manages to salvage "kai"’s consciousness after giving him his positive emotions back, so the floormaster trio can stay a trio! yippee

sei and kai swap - kai died in the assassin battle royale when they were kids instead of sei (also, having been able to grow up and learn about Gender, sei uses they/them)

sei was made to keep an eye on emiri by asunaro! unlike with kai and the chidouins, they don’t really harbor many positive feelings towards her, or so they says hsjsksk . they’ve kinda grown a bit affectionate towards her, but would NEVER admit it. unlike kai, they didn’t fail at being an assassin, and so they’re still an assassin to this day. also, when the dying kai asked sei to kill him instead, sei actually obliged with it! they have been carrying this guilt for a decade! also, being a qkai shipper, i realized that the equivalent to that in this au is sei x reko and i can’t decide if i think it’s cursed or blessed.

kai satou died long ago, but asunaro crafted a replacement for him - ream aster (a pun on "remaster"), the dressup doll. as previously mentioned, aster is close with joe and sara (or ropp and rinny as he knows them), and sees them in a rather familial light. he’s not quite as openly dickish as ranger, but he definitely has his moments hshgshsjksksk. as for the clothes aster wears, they’re kanna’s bucket, kurumada’s bandages, sei’s mask, hayasaka’s tie, and michiru’s glasses! the aster equivalent to rio laizer is ream aker (remaker), and like i said in joe’s section aker actually gets to exist for more than ten seconds! i’m still kinda conflicted on what i want to do with him though.

anzu and kanna swap - kanna and kugie both die in their first trials, anzu and kurumada are siblings

like kanna, anzu’s really torn up by kurumada’s death, and for a while blames herself for it. i’ve said before how emiri is so much gruffer than sara, and how this usually works to her disadvantage - however, anzu ends up associating emiri with kurumada, just like how kanna associated sara with kugie! anzu’s a lot sadder in this au, only just barely becoming the happy clown girl we know and love on the third day of attractions… and, considering her role and the choice we make during the second main game, we all know how that turns out :(

kanna gets to not only be a dummy, but have her sister with her! she does end up dying eventually in the roulette, which is sad, but uh… at least she has kugie there with her? or something? her taking anzu’s role means that she’s the dummy assigned to either q-taro or hinako! if the former, she gets a father figure, if the latter, she gets a close friend. common w in the kanna kizuchi community.

kurumada and kugie swap - kanna and kugie both die in their first trials, kurumada and anzu are siblings

kurumada sadly dies very early on, which i feel bad about since he never got too much screentime in the first place… at least his ass can haunt the narrative?

kugie, on the other hand! in comparison to kurumada, she gets a wealth of plot relevancy. instead of hugging maple to stop her from attacking/kill her, like kurumada did, she hugs meister to comfort him… of course, it’s the same end result :( she’s even more stubborn about the whole "don’t charge me if i’m going to die anyway, save it for the others" thing than kurumada is, except unlike him she doesn’t lie about the reason lol

ranmaru and gin swap - ranmaru is the main support character/emiri’s favorite, gin is the dummy assigned to emiri

ranmaru!!! he sees emiri as a big sister/mother figure, but unlike gin he’s not vocal about it since he’s embarrassed. i really want to keep his crush on sara in this au since it’d be funny, but that would mean him seeing the "doll" that’s clearly working with their kidnappers and thinking "ok but she’s kinda hot tho" so idk. unlike gin’s reason for not taking people’s tokens (him seeing it as being too close to gambling), ranmaru views the sub-game as having some kind of nefarious hidden purpose and as such choosing to abstain. which he was right about! just… didn’t go about it in the right way :p

I FELT SO BAD ABOUT THIS SWAP ONCE I REALIZED WHAT IT MEANT FOR GIN IN THE LOGIC ROUTE. GIN BABY BOY I AM SO SORRY. in logic route his motive isn’t ranmaru’s whole one-sided crush thing, but he kind of views emiri as his mother and as such it’s easy for her to manipulate him. im so sorry gin. in emotion route instead of planning to upload michiru’s ai into his body (since that’d be weird considering she’s a thirty-year-old woman and he’s a twelve-year-old boy) he tries to upload it into her doll instead. doesn’t work out though.

hayasaka and mishima swap - hayasaka dies early on, mishima is a dummy

hayasaka is sort of mai’s teacher in this au! he doesn’t teach her officially, but he tutors her in data entry (since that’s his job pretty much). they have a sort of sibling-y dynamic, which is why he wants to protect her. i’m personally of the belief that mishima knows a bit more about the death game than he’s letting on, although i couldn’t give you a reason why lol, so swapping him with the guy who’s been involved with asunaro made sense to me.

mishima and nao don’t survive their first trials, making mishima a dunmy! he’s assigned to ranmaru, and they’re good buddy chum pal friends. his and nao’s relationship is the same as canon in this au. his presence in the story means being able to unlock some additional info in the office - that of sara and joe! when emiri realizes that sara and joe are rinny and ropp, she’s like… oh shit, i’ve been being a dick to these LITERAL SEVENTEEN-YEAR-OLDS. also, why the hell are LITERAL SEVENTEEN-YEAR-OLDS our floormasters. did asunaro really have no better ideas.

mai and nao swap - mai and hayasaka are friends, nao is a dummy

like i said in the last section, hayasaka tutors mai on data entry! she’s a medical student as well as a baker in this au, for the reason of I Think It’d Be Neat. she also ends up with the sacrifice in chapter two, and begs emiri to tie the votes for her. massacre ending my beloved………..

nao is very silly here. she stabs reko rip. i only realized a bit after making the list that naoreko and qmai swap so thats kinda funny to me. she has shins hands probably (still working out the details but yea)

real hinako and alice swap - hinako lives through their first trial and alice dies, an imposter alice takes his place in chapter 3 (i’m still working out the kinks with this swap)

(trigger warning for suicide discussion.) hinako lives through her first trial yay! however, like alice, she hides in the locker like a dumbass. her fake name is miyado yamada. she takes up the fake name due to not wanting to be recognized - about a year before the death game, she attempted to kill herself. it didn’t work, however, and she became the face of suicide preventation in japan. she also comes from the same orphanage as q-taro!

i’m still back and forth on the fake alice lore tbh. for now, alice had a secret twin who got separated from him at birth, permanently borrowed by asunaro. this secret twin, whom we’ll call arisu because it’s easy, ends up taking alice’s place as a dummy in chapter 3. with the help of the alice ai, he’s able to imitate him almost perfectly. even reko only notices a few discrepancies.

sou and shin swap - Oh Boy.

sou desperately wanted to be a participant in the death game, but asunaro wanted him to be a floormaster. to that, he said fuck you. he called up shin like "hi shin" "HIYORI YOU’RE ALIVE?!" "shinnnnn do u want to steal my identity :3" "CAN WE GO BACK TO THE PART WHERE YOU’RE ALIVE?!" in the end shin agreed to swap places, simply because sou told him about the 0.0 survival rate and he was not having that. sou erased his own memories so that he could go into the death game completely blind. however this had the side effect of him ending up hating the death game and asunaro and wanting to destroy it. him and anzu have that sibling dynamic, which is sweet until you realize that the chapter 2 main game exists. he steals shin’s identity because his first trial told him about the canidate/non-candidate thing, and so he stole shin’s identity because shin was a canidate!

shin is forced to take sou’s role as the fourth/fifth floor’s floormaster. he’s really grumpy and lackluster about it, but he’s really upset that him being the floormaster also means he’s pretty much doomed to die because WHAT THE FUCK HIYORI YOU NEVER TOLD ME THIS?! he’s really one-sidedly grumpy at sou, who doesn’t really get why because as previously mentioned he erased his own memories.

q-taro and reko swap - reko starts selfish and gets development, q-taro may or may not die

like i said in hinako’s section, her and q-taro come from the same orphanage, so they have a sibling relationship like alice and reko but without the "i hate you now because you’re a murderer" thing. q-taro gets replaced with a fake in the room of lies, leading to the route divergence! if he lives and hinako dies, he mourns not being able to protect her more or tell her what she meant to him. if she lives and he dies, it’s pretty much the same, except hinako has it even worse due to being Actively Suicidal and the one person she cares about on this shithole died because of her. fun times

reko acts more like pre-alice-murder-case reko, simply due to not having changed over time like she did in canon. by chapter 3, she acts more like her canon self. when arisu dies in the ch3 roulette, she talks about how she had a feeling that he wasn’t the real alice. she gets pinned to the target with ranmaru, but is much more willing to sacrifice herself than q-taro is in canon, and takes the first dose of venom.

keiji and megumi swap - keiji fucking dies

in this au, their first trial had a hidden gimmick - if the switch is pressed to take off megumi’s chains, the chains switch to keiji instead. there is a way for both of them to survive, by the switch being pressed again… but megumi doesn’t press it again. keiji fucking dies.

megumi is super sus to emiri and michiru, although she puts up a good front to most of the others. she ends up slowly becoming less corrupt as time goes on, though! and in chapter three her and emiri are actually real allies instead of fake allies. hip hip hooray.

maple and meister swap - maple is in charge of the roulettes, meister is the most powerful obstructor

maple is in charge of the roulettes yay! this means she does NOT have to have a crush on sou, and she does NOT have to die tragically. yippee! she feels very bad for everybody but she is simply doing her job

meister also doesn’t have a crush on anybody since he is a grown-ass adult and that’d be weird. instead he’s coded to see shin as a son. he usually acts like regular meister but his emotional state does fluctuates the same way maple’s does in canon.

…that was really long i am SO sorry. autism 💥

[icharchivist]

heyy icha!! started up autumn, it’s fun!! got through the first 16 chapters and decided it was time to pause so here’s my thoughts.

I was very surprised by the random guy azami called during summer act 2, but actually it is just. idk. shift is cool. you can absolutely Hear the way azami’s voice gets lighter and looser when they chat. it’s wonderful. actually hugeee props to azami’s voice actor—I feel like soo much of azami’s character is inherent in his voice? like he’s kind of muted in subtle in the way that he talks which is kinda hard to convey with text only, because he’s Also sharp-tongued so if you’re only looking at the text, it’s a bit hard to notice he’s actually kinda… quiet? anyways I like shift it’s nice that azami just has a like. Normal Friend yknow? and shifts family seems cool too. so I’m glad that azami at least has like, an example of a healthy kind of family dynamic and stuff.

anyways. the way u could hear a pin drop when azami says hes gonna join akigumiz rly unfortunate he announced it AFTER sakoda announced the boss was trying to get him back. since like. uh. hed decided it beforehand, anyways. through kumons suggestion. at first I was a bit like cmon sakyo… you’re gonna send that kid back to his dad? homophobia. however the fact that he 100% called it regarding azami making something up for his portrait is so funny like ah. he was correct there.

like banri I also think azami is good for autumn so someone can bicker with sakyo. the way they just started physically brawling was so fun but what was funnier was omi breaking up the fight with the same level of casualness he broke up banri and juzas fighting. it’s like… these r not even two rowdy teens anymore. sakyo is 31. love that for him tho.

banri is also being such a good leader. checking in with azami and helping him with his portrait thing. his collage? reminded him of how he advised yuki in into the night. he feels reliable now, which is cool? anyways yeah he help. it was nice to see him tell azami abt the previous autumn exploits. the rookie introduction is rly such a good mechanic… it’s like. new chara for one. but bc they have to be introduced to the troupe it’s such a good way of bringing up past themes naturally and then having the opportunity to develop them further. anyways it’s nice to see autumn like. Bonding. I’m sooo invested in that one scene where azami tells omi not to bring him stuff like scones.

sakyo: “I practically raised him”

me: ah. *horrible impression of sakyo* hmph. I’m not the step dad, I’m the dad that stepped up.

this is a total shot in the dark but I have this like feeling that azami, during this story, is going to cry. Loudly. and I’m going to tear up abt it. we shall see.

kumon and muku being like angel devil fairies was SO CUTE. their voices especially!! like the way kumon has to quiet down his voice by a lot lol. anyways it was sooo lovely. I loved how it paralleled what natsugumi did to help out kumon. and I especially liked!! kumon bursts out laughing when natsugumi does their girls thing but here azami doesn’t like actually Laugh™ at all, but you can hear the laughter in his voice? it’s so cool.

I liked azamis audition portrait. the fact that he’s unable to give up his makeup is so good, and I really loved the convo he had with kazunari later, where kazunari pointed out that his family and makeup might be both so important to him that he’s unable to simply give one up… it’s nice, seeing characters give advice. but yeah azami. I am Looking at the part where he’s like oh I can give u makeovers but I’m kinda new with all this stuff, because all my old stuff is broken. and the way that he refuses to show them what he looks like wearing normal makeup…? I’d bet both of those r related to his dad who is not sakyo.

like oh my god the “…” from azami while izumi says she needs a parent/guardian permission. and then sakyo says like “I’m basically his guardian” and then azami going “…!” like oh u Know azami had that moment of uncertainty like. man… sakyo hates me anyways is he gonna send me back. like it’s just like… Telling he asks tsuzuru to cast sakyo as the villain of the story. when I saw that scene I was like ohhhh sorry azami. you’ve just given tsuzuru something terrible: personal info abt yourself. you realize he’s absolutely going to make u confront stuff with his play right. actually I did watch the play and. it’s very the stranger esque in that they’re all like. we live in a doomed apocalypse. I am a unique existence with it but this gift of mine will never be imparted unto others. still we shall live. as the only two real people. some people r beyond saving. like tsuzuru is so weirdly depressing during these plays. I respect that. and I was right bc he did throw in an emotional dad scene.

azamis such a professional middle schooler. like the makeup and also writing for a site. I loveee seeing azuma and yuki bond with him. let’s gooo. yuki and azami teaming up for budget is awesome. they’re actually just a great duo together. like first off the fact that they’re two middle schoolers who can seemingly put the fear of god in anyone is so choice. I loved seeing how professionally they worked during that fashion show. and banri modeled too! made me have feelings abt into the night again lol. also that azami scene was so good! like u said, the rookie cg in act 2 really showcases the relevant character well… the whole school festival was just nice. kazunaris talk with azami was rly cool ofc and the whole like. way azami is like ah. once I’m in high school I probably can’t do anything… and the little detail that both tenma and misumi haven’t ever been to a school festival is so like. wow. they’ve been denied a lot of “normal life” things bc of different reasons and now they get to experience them! idk it makes the fact that misumi treats tenma like his younger brother all the more heartwarming.

loved the whole thing where they discussed themes for the autumn troupe play. like juza talking abt like frilly gowns and grand staircases and when banris like wtf he’s like what? you think I can’t do it? get this guy in a dress for real.

they eventually settled on the undead / zombie theme but like… when taichi suggested visual kei tsuzuru actually didn’t seem too against is sooo. what I’m saying is. a3 autumn does a version of zombieland saga. I’ve never seen that show but it’s abt zombie musicians right. speaking of tsuzuru I love that he just passed out between a door so he didn’t hit his head. that’s like a skill.

the whole kindergarten thing was so cute. like the animal costumes… I saw omi and squinted like. wait oh my god is he in a WOLF costume!! and he was!!! I think that’s like. So Cute. like can I imagine autumn sitting around those costumes picking and someone’s like well, omi, this one’s kinda like, your name…. from personal experience tho there r absolutely kids who would see juza and stuff and be like oh my god he’s so cool I’m gonna follow him forever. but the animal costumes were a smart choice. and hey now they have em for free! more things to haunt tsuzuru with <3 when I first saw them I immediately thought of. yknow the volume 3 extras of gsnk where nozaki wears that bear costume and does judo. I love that bit. the voice acting for the section was so good tho like juza is kinda stilted taichi is kinda nervous and banri sounds extremely breezy abt the whole thing bc hes banri and can pull it off.

I rly liked both taichi and juza’s collages abt running away but to me it’s like. So Funny. how taichi and juza r like “I promised I’d be a better person from then on… and when I’m a better person I’ll…” or something like that and then when azamis like soooo how about now they’re like ah… I’m not nearly good enough yet. like i get why they r still uncomfortable with themselves but from personal experience like. reaching for an idealized self that u have to get to First before you’re Allowed to do things is like… not good. anywyas to me it’s rly funny that like azamis reaction to both of these has been kind of like “um okay? why are u still worried about that loser.” (he’s much less harsh abt it I just think this phrasing is funnier)

azamis response to taichi asking him abt his love life, tho… ”k-kiss? that’s for after marriage!” like oh my god u have to introduce her to parents, date, get engaged, and THEN you hold hands? and taichi being like. did sakyo teach you that…? personally I think azami managed that level of repression all on his own. like honestly tho for him the “introduce to parents” is probably a pretty. terrifying step so I can see why he’d be hesitant.

oh I wanted to talk abt juzas portrait. first of all him jumping in as a bodyguard to azami was so nice. the power of his glare alone! I know we haven’t seen omi or sakyo do a boyhood collage yet but I have to imagine that like midway thru juzas collage azami is squinting at autumn like… is this secretly a troubled kids home? is it like just normal to run away from home once, statistically? anyways juzas both correct in that u can learn to avoid fights but azamis also correct in that like. what’s he gonna do. let those guys kick the shit out of him?

but anyways juzas portrait made me tear up. like the. the. ”Kumon’s nothing like me. He ain’t big or bulky, and he’s like a ray of sunshine. Everybody loves him. He even cares about me.” LIKE FIRST OFF IM GOING TO CRY… JUZA…. second off the way I literally wrote “If there was ever a human embodiment of sunshine…” in my fic abt kumon. me and juza mind meld. jk this is such an obvious description that I think anyone reading through summertime survival strikes back would be like oh yeah this guys like sunshine.

but the way that like. all juza did was get picked on by a bully, glared at him, and then the bully stepped back and fell off the stairs? and juza stayed frozen in place instead of running bc he. I dunno. felt guilty probably? or just terrified bc oh my god the injuries… like even in this collage he describes the whole thing as a “mistake” on his part even tho it’s like. he didn’t do anything!! and then his mother had to apologize for him too… I love that she was angry on his behalf tho. hyodo mom I love you. and it was so nice that they found him bc it was the place where kumon played catch with him.

anyways I loved that the lil detail of like, tsuzuru visiting his family to explain why spring and winter weren’t at the festival like. was used to effectively to bring up zafra and stuff. I think it’s cool that tsuzuru recognized that it looked similar to citron’s stuff! like even tho tsuzuru is so exasperated with him he always seems to like. know the word citron wants to say and like. Pays Attention it’s nice. also when tsuzuru was like “I spent the whole time cleaning” I was just like ah. oh my god. if spring troupe ever leads tsuzuru on a play again… cinderella is right there. citron as Prince Charming ofc. masumi as an evil stepmother bc I think the drama of that role will be good for him in that it’s kinda a little silly and grand. he can’t rly cool guy his way out of it. like probably this won’t happen bc we already got a play with tsuzuru and citron as lead and co-lead but I can like, dream. it would overlap pretty hard with clockwork heart anyways bc I imagine the whole miracle vibes of cinderella would make tsuzuru have mizuno feelings again. but like hey. could be a fun fan-creation.

anyways zafra…. just wanna say I’d had it in my head that citron was a runaway prince since like. act 1 of spring when he said he ran from his country soooo… not gonna be like I called it but I called it!! tho I think this was kind of an easy guess lol. like when he’s all monarchy hater in alex in wonderland I think it’s pretty blatant.

uh but chikage said their monarchy has been having issues lately, but tsuzuru was like oh it’s fine. a new king is gonna be crowned in a few months apparently. and when izumi asks if citron is going back he goes “yes. I am… sure I will”

assembling the evidence. chikage would know secret internal details due to the organization, but tsuzuru would only be aware of public facing stuff. so my theory is… citron was a prince of zafra, and he ran away. I think he described himself as like an “eyesore” to the people he ran away from. this caused internal strife within the monarchy bc like. hey who the fuck is gonna inherit now. but seeing that we see guy in one of the event stories go “…citronia” or whatever I fully believe guy like. is citrons retainer or guard or something and is here to bring citron back and put him on the throne. hence why citron is like ah… I’m sure I’ll be at that coronation… because they’re going to coronate ME… and I’m being dragged back there….

the other alternate theory I have is that citrons like part of a succession war. the reason I think this is bc like. it would be a reason for why citron was like I’m an eyesore. also he mentions having three younger brothers during the new years event and says they don’t want to see him again. so citron is just like ha… yeah… sure… I’ll be at the coronation… (I Am Never Going Back) instead. and guy is chasing him to drag him back bc he cares abt him. I bet he’s the guy citron wants to see again. and also the source of that charm citron was staring at.

anyways the base of these two r the same. I’m excited to see what the facts are! I bet that’ll be in winter—it’ll be a fun spin since so much of spring was occupied by winter since hisoka was such a big deal there. and it’ll happen in reverse with citron being a big deal I assume. summer and autumn also have like. kumon and azami so they kind of overlap their seasons too.

anyways obviously this is good setup for winter arc but I think it’s also like. a perfect bit to have in autumn bc like thematically. azami is also struggling with like. inheriting a position he’s on the run from.

that’s all I have for now! excited for whatever zombie run night is

aaHH KIRI HI <3333 GOOD TO SEE YOU WITH AUTUMN OUR WAY

Shift does indeed sound very cool!! it makes me so happy how Azami lights up when he's talking to him, you can truly feel how close they are. And you're so right about Azami's voice, and all kudos to his voice actor. I think you sum it up well, he's quiet despite his lines generally being sharp and stuff, and with Shift's phonecalls making him this happy it constrats even more.

AND HELPP. Crazy how at this point it's Chikage's joining that went with the least problem. (not the same as "Chikage staying" which was the core of the issue but you get what i mean.) and DLKFJDLKF yeah Sakyo knows this kid so well. for better or for worse.

ah yeah the true admission fee to Autumn: you need to bicker with Sakyo. This is the new rule. And hey good on Sakyo to remain young like that! Omimi really embracing his place in the Autumn Troupe as the fightbreaker.

BANRIIII he's always so good sobs. It really shows how far he has come on his own and yeah, i can definitely see a bit of how he advised Yuki come out there as well. And it shows also how closely he cares and look out for his troupe now that he can tell all of it to Azami. it's so nice.

FDKJFLKD POOR SAKYO…. probably deserved BUT POOR SAKYO.

:3c interesting ehehe.

And yess god those kids are so cute. Kumon really just learnt from Summer how they made him feel better, and then decided to give it back to others as well. He knows it worked on him!!! it must also works on Azami!!! God this scene is so cute. solidarity!!

Azami's audition was really good and his dilema is really interesting toto go through. I did like Kazunari helping out too. I really like what you say about Azami's makeup stuff and "his dad who's not Sakyo" is such a funny way to talk about his bio dad. get out of the way bio dad you might be the DNA but you're not as dad as Sakyo.

the scene where Azami expects Sakyo to send him back home but Sakyo backs him up is so!! AND "ohhhh sorry azami. you’ve just given tsuzuru something terrible: personal info abt yourself. you realize he’s absolutely going to make u confront stuff with his play right." IM ABSOLUTEY CRYING OVER THIS. so true though. Azami, unknowingly giving Tsuzuru ammo. Tsuzuru: sure :) Everyone at Mankai: oooh boy kid, rookie mistake.

And so true it really is a lot like The Stranger. Also probably something to be said with how in both plays Sakyo plays a father who was doomed to screw his own child over no matter how much he cared about them. And hey Tsuzuru makes it work, and maybe getting depressing in Autumn is kinda the afterfact of having to be so damn silly with Summer. balancing it out.

"AZAMI IS SUCH A PROFESSIONAL MIDDLE SCHOOLER" THIS IS SO ACCURATE HELPP. And yess i love the Fashion Trio. Esp with the whole subtext of Yuki and Azuma's dynamic originally being really like, "Azuma can prove those kids who might be unsure about their future that there is one to be had by still being themselves and enjoying themselves." Azami doesn't need this lesson as much as Yuki but it can still be reassuring. And Yuki and Azami together are a MENACE, SAkyo's greatest nightmare, love that for them. AND YESS GOSHH the modeling thing just sent me right back to Into the Night as well!! DKLJFKDLF i really had the Priviliege of Insight to mention that about the CG, since i know all of them, but yeah, it really showcase them very well. And yeah the school festival was really nice, and it must also have really helped Azami to participate to something so… normal. usual for people his age yaknow? being a Yakuza son probably doesn't make those as usual as it could be otherwise. shoves Azami with Tenma and Misumi gang of "we're going to show them what Normal is or so help us."

GET JUZA A FUCKING DRESS THIS IS A THREAT NOW. i'm still a bit bitter that Banri was the SSR card for the noble-woman dresses event, this should have been Juza's time to shine. Juza KEEPS wanting it SO BAD and Banri keeps shutting him off, why is Banri the one getting the frilly gowns. GET JUZA A DRESS.

isn't Zombieland saga about idols especially? but yes, what works would work, it'd be fun! but i'd love to see a Vkei look, whenever you guys are ready!!! And Tsuzuru truly has a skill at this point rip.

AND YES THE KINDERGARDEN THING WAS SO CUTE. And pleaaase it's so cute i could totally see those kids adoring Juza. Joining Kumon in the Juza fanclub. But yeah the animal costumes were a smart way to make sure the kids would feel safe. And <333 always fan of tormanting Tsuzuru <3 AND HELPP THE GSNK REFERENCE. BEAUTIFUL.

The collages are so good yeah!!! and sobs yeah they're still so uncomfortable with themselves but it's especially striking considering how far those two have come…. esp Taichi who had to run off from the Godza and had to come to term with his spy days, and Juza really going from thinking of himself as an acting lost cause to genuinely managing through his insecurities and inspiring everyone around him. Alas yeah, they both are still so ashamed of who they were and still gunning for so much higher that they don't see that… "“um okay? why are u still worried about that loser.”" LKFJDLKFJDLKFJKLDFJFDFD

AND HELPP. honestly i could see Azami do that all of his own, remember that Sakyo loves romance novels and has no problem sharing them with Muku, so anything about that is fully Azami made. Also very good point about introduce to parents.

Juza <333 always the savior isn't he. AND HELP i could imagine Azami just think that at this point. Probably already clocking "ok i was thinking Omi might be a normal dude but now that i've heard how the whole troupe is i have Doubts." Also for the funfact i have a friend whom i dragged into a3 a bit kicking and screaming, who had a hard time getting too involved but when he related to the charas, he related hard (Itaru and Tenma for instance came to murder him, if that gives any idea). Anyway we went into Autumn, watching the anime, and he was so scared because every single one of them were his type, so he was worried to be emotionally damaged by looking at a mirror, and we finished the chapter and he was like. actually i'm fine. I'm so fine. But he got curious about Azami so we watched Autumn 2. And he was quiet for a long time, going through the collages and stuff. And eventually, i think around the time of Juza's? my friend turned to me and went. "did i ever tell you I once ran away from home." And it was aBSOLUTELY HYSTERICAL he was SO MAD by the end of this chapter, he ended up relating to Azami a litttle too much AND everything that didn't hit hard in the first chapter ended up hitting him hard by the second one. Point is. "is it like just normal to run away from home once, statistically?" it is for punkass troublemakers. not targetting anyone. (also let's talk about how Misumi also ran away from home but only to never come back. Honorary Autumn kid.) AND YEAH both are right. But i love Juza's take away still.

And Juza's portrait was so emotional and how much he cares and wanted to protect Kumon was just so :sob: AND AAHHH You REALLY understand Juza's mind so well that you looked at Kumon and knew exactly how to refer to him the Juza way. (but yes Kumon IS the sunshine itself.) and Juza poor kid. No one ever cut him some slack :( HYODO MOM SO GOOD WE LOVE THE HYODOSAKISAKA HOUSEHOLD IN HERE. But yes sobs Kumon finding him because Juza couldn't help but go to somewhere he probably felt safe to and it meant being safe with his brother…. sioft.

and god yeah the Tsuzuru bits is really cool. I remember in the first Summer chapter my biggest issue with it was how there was so little focus on Spring that it felt like they weren't living in the same place….. and i'm just so glad this was an issue that was never truly repeated, and moment like that showcase it so much. the rookies chapters tends to focus on two troupes at once already (like Awakening Moon was Spring and Winter), but here they still had some focus on non-focus troupe and it's so nice. And i love that it showcases Tsuzuru and Citron's dynamic so well it's so soft. AND HELPPP cinderella play when Tsuzuru, you have it all set up for you!!! And god i love the casting for that. And true for the vibes (note: Sakuya as the Fairy God Mother? baby angel that grant people wishes because he gives them an opportunity to? (like how it's giving the opportunity to keep the theater opened that helped everyone?)). Anyway as a fanplay it works still. Tsuzuru coming to term with his feelings for Mizuno everytime he colead with Citron is really funny tho.

AND HELPP. I still won't say anything for Citron but yeah things are starting to shape up! And oh god Citron's reply to it all huh. God. Anyway interesting theories, obviously i can't comment on them just yet but. interesting!

but yeah the duo season focus is built on each chapters in a sense so Spring will have its time to shine again next chapter. I don't htink it's that much of a spoiler since we do know Guy is looking for Citron, the same way we knew early on Chikage was looking for Hisoka. Something to be said about how Spring and Winter both have their past catching up to them with an acquitance from the past coming back to get you, while Summer and Autumn's main connection is between the two new kids who are starting to get to know one another. (and obviously Kumon-Juza, but i suppose it's also a bit like Azami-Sakyo currently yaknow? family bonds over troupe bonds).

Anyway! :D

Thank you once again for the ask <333 so much goodies in there and it's always so fun to relive the chapter with you like this!!! thank you for sharing all of this <333

take care and see you around :3c

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

HIIII I see that u hv a match up goin on and Id like to try! Would u mind doing one for me with Obey Me?

Pronouns : She/they

Sexuality: Im not sure exactly??... still discovering but I know that I like both sexes

Infp 4w5 / Cancer sun Taurus moon n Scorpio rising (I saw some doing not just the sun sign so i think it would be fun if i include all 3 lol)

Appearance: Im South East Asian. Around 5'2. I hv shoulder length black hair, black eyes and olive toned skin. My hairstyle is akin to the jellyfish hair. I rarely wear makeup and would just hv my bare face out due to its sensitivity to breakouts. And my clothing, its mostly modest/covering for academic places or just comfy and quick with any cool baggy tees i hv. Its my current closet, since i dont hv much occasions to go grand and i just wanna blend in with everyone around me lookin like an npc. But id love to wear more self expressing stuff in the future, to my desire. More accessories, colorful makeups and fashions like dark couquette/gyaru or so!

Personality: My personality, id say its two sided. I guess hv an open mind and easy going (to some degree ofc). A dream chaser and a listener. Sometimes (just sometimes), i can get my mind through a problem and stay grounded. Im also empathic? I like consoling with people and I appreciate the smallest details. I feel for people's struggle and I hold hopes in them. However, i can get moody, its so unexpected and intense that even im scared of it. I can be very quiet then, and dissociative. Id just want to be alone by that time to figure out my situation. Ive been said to appear gloomy or hard to approach too :cry: If im pissed, im venomous. And im actually an anxious person, of all sorts of things. Self deprecating too, i almost forgot abt that. But if i feel suitable, i get funky and enjoy myself hehe.

Likes/Dislikes : I like visual novels, rhythm games and those with good storytelling; a variety of music genres that focus on melody, instrument, composing; local asian food; sleeping with plushies; arts n crafts; esoteric things; philosophy study; my friends; solitude and continuation; aesthetic or hidden values and uhhh nice, mannered intriguing people.

I dont like smelly people doe. People who are narrow minded icks me oops. Pls dont tryna barge in on me when im busy unless it helps. I hate the sun... And not getting myself tented after a long day. I dislike my parents as well, yikes. Worst of all, being opressed.

Hobbies : doll, bracelet making; drawing, online shopping, rhythm game arcade, reading philosophy works, uhh getting invested in random medias...

Anyways, thats my submission! If u do reply, tysm for the matchup!!!

Hi Anon! Thank you for the request! I hope you like your matchup!

In Obey Me, I match you with...

Asmo is the best person to hype you up about wearing more self-expressing things. He’s great at putting outfits together and will give you honest and genuine feedback.

Doesn’t mind your personality changes. He knows what mood swings are like so he’s very understanding.

Please go online shopping with him! But set a budget because you’re both liable to get caught up in the energy and spend too much. But online shopping with Asmo would be so much fun.

Not great at giving you alone time but if you say you need some space, he’ll respect your wishes. While you’re enjoying your alone time, he’ll do a spa day or hang out with some of his friends.

Asmo loves your plushies. He thinks they’re really cute and, if you’re okay with it, would love to borrow some of them to sleep with as well. He’ll take good care of them and swaps them out occasionally so you’ve got a constantly rotating roster of plushies in your room.