#how will i survive another year?
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Don't Wormy About Me.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#jiang cheng#wei wuxian#yu ziyuan#Please allow me to make it clear how important I think the hug between YZY and JC is in regards to several aspects of their characters#For one - it is the resolution and reveal that behind all the harsh words and bitterness...She really did love her son.#A hug is a soft gesture that you would never expect from someone like YZY and the fact she shows JC this affection now -#-Tells us how she knows that this upcoming battle is a death sentence for her.#Her giving away Zidan is honestly overkill but another sign of her truly showing him how she loves him and wants him to survive.#The dread of knowing she's walking back to a fight without zidian and trying to keep up brave face one last time...chilling.#Zidian represents legacy and promises. And this is going to both save and destroy Jiang Cheng as he carries this weight alone.#Heartbreaking stuff! Didn't draw it in the comic because I wanted to draw a silly worm on a string!#WWX tried to help JC out of the knot but got stuck in it.#Those worm on a string tricks are harder than they look!#Also; it's been about a year since the last boat joke - but indeed this is the 11th boat of pd-mdzs. No need to do the math.
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once i had a friend that i was literally terrified to like the same character as because they were so gatekeepy. like i kid you not i had a full blown panic attack when i realized i liked a character they liked and messaged a mutual friend like ‘do you think they’ll be okay with it’ and i thought that was normal 💀 that should’ve been my first sign to run
#i didn’t#i stayed for like another year and a half#i could honestly entertain you guys with crazy stories for hours#it’s almost funny looking back on it#i hadn’t realized how awful and draining they were until they were out of my life#and i am so fucking glad they are 😭#i would not have survived another year with them as a friend
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#im lazy as hell#4 boxes in i lost my mind hahaha#megastar#im rewatching g1#ill draw better latee trust me#i just need to learn how to draw#hes supposed to be kissing the gun i uhhhh couldnt portray that so take my word for it#maccadam#transformers#anyways how yall nerds doing? i found my megatron figurine that survived getting ran over by a car. hes on my desk now.#anyways on the topic of g1 WTF IS WRONG WITH THESE TWO????#you ever see some shit like damn i hope you two die together#they give me secondhand cringe. head in hands i cant be near these deranged mfs#5 years ago ppl tried to pressure me away from this ship lmao#megatron#starscream#dawg im being ran through by my workload.#wanna hear another very real problem i have? so im a starscream fan since i was like 7. always a ss fan#and one time when i was a teen my mom accidentally ran over my megatron toy with her car so i begged my parents for a model kit#ss was out of stock for years so i got tc. i bought that for $24 and it was all chill#recently i was thinking i want the entire dumbass squad. all 3. i checked the price#$58??? MINIMUM???? AVG PRICE IS 70???? for HIM???#so what i need yall to do is i need a recs so i can infiltrate hasbro and character assassinate ss so bad the merch price drops back to $30#for the small cost of 20 rec letters i promise to destroy the franchise. how about it? then we can all get merch for better prices. cool!#or we can start a gofund me and raise millions so i can become an investor and tell them to lower prices from outside the club#maybe i should email the board. some shit like hey i was planning on having kids but i cant if the toys cost as much as the hospital bill#can you lower the prices so i can buy my future kids toys so i can indoctrinate them like my dad indoctrinated me to become a lifelong fan#sincerely. two generations of TF fans (your franchise isnt that old yet and i hope my kids can afford to be the third gen)
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I just realized something, his eyes are white in this scene in the trailer. It may be an animation thing, and I guess I was assuming that this is a flashback because of his hair, but Simon's eyes are only ever white post-magic, so maybe this is something else.
#Is he going to get to see her again??#Ugh my heart can only ache so long#I can't wait another week to see Betty I don't understand how he's gone 12 years and survived#simon petrikov#petrigrof#betty grof#fionna and cake
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i spend a lot of time thinking about the empty space between jim and bones at spock's funeral
#the empty space is spock. obviously.#with hindsight it's hard to say if the distance jim and bones have put between themselves is more or less tragic#knowing that spock is there in both ways: physically in his casket and spiritually in bones himself. but human perception of death only#accounts for the physical. the idea of a soul being unequivocally present in that moment is one that neither of them really believes in#(jim and bones are both written at least vaguely christian. god and the eternal soul are certainly in their belief systems but neither#of them are deeply religious within canon especially when compared to other characters such as the bajorans in tng/ds9)#have they parted because spock should be there in the center despite how often bones and spock would make jim their fulcrum#or have they parted because passing that threshold is too painful without one of them there. a missing limb with phantom pangs.#they could both survive without spock but i always wonder to what degree; 'how do you feel' 'i feel young'#and a few years later it's spock and bones who must survive without jim#never knowing that he hadn't died but continued on in the nexus until it's too late#and we never know if bones ever learns that jim survived and later dies doing what he always does: serving the greater good#but we do know that spock outlives them both. he survives without either of them for so long. he never marries.#and then he sends himself on a suicide mission -- to serve the greater good.#ultimately to end up in another universe where he sees the two of them again: young and healthy and so full of life#and once again he dies before either of them.#tos#the wrath of khan#mcspirk#triumvirate#triposting
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It wouldn't be a FNAF cosplay day at Comic Con if I didn't get my traditional pizza :)
#🎃 Cryptid Sighting#🎃 Photographic evidence#FNAF2 Nightguard#FNAF Cosplay#Rose City Comic Con 2024#Misadventures around Portland#Food#The rest of the cosplay has gone through various upgrades (& downgrades djdhdh) but that mask is 7 years old!!!#Hard to believe it's survived that long- it's held together with hot glue & hope#It's amazing how many FNAF cosplayers I ran across today!#*crotchety old man voice* why back in the old days (first few? years wearing my security guard cosplay) I never saw another FNAF cosplayer-#- on the con floor!#But today there were SO. MANY! And even two Bonnies in the cosplay competition! It made me so happy!!! 🥹#Also the number of people doing the 'hur-hur-hur-hur-hur' thing as I went by was ... a lot#Not annoyed or anything- just amused since I never really heard more than 1 or 2 people do it previous years#It was a good time. Been a little overwhelmed with Things lately so I was kind of a ditz all day but I had fun all the same!
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I couldn't not draw anything with them for Valentines day 💖 Here's a song for them 💝
These two drawings are not supported to be together exactly but I drew them so close that I couldn't take separate photos :/ (they are technically together but not next to each other. Imagine them being in their own offices while receiving these gifts)
Oh well.
#one time i saw a 'how to draw a rose' tutorial and it hasn't left my brain since. it's been 7 years i think#ace attorney#aa#phoenix wright ace attorney#phoenix wright#naruhodo ryuichi#miles edgeworth#Edgeworth#mitsurugi reiji#wrightworth#narumitsu#valentines day#happy valentine's day#fanart#art#traditional art#btw he didn't just give him one rose. Gumshoe just lost the rest while trying to deliver them. only one survived. Phoenix doesn't mind#second post today and I will post another#i'm on fire#i love that song and so should you btw
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I don't think I've ever seen someone look more like a renaissance painting more than Assad Zaman.
#LIKE???LOOK AT HIM 🩷#assad zaman#i cant believe how beauchiful he is#truly a renaissance painting.#iwtv#yess I miss my wife and i cant wait until i see him again#how am i to survive for another 1+ year#COME BACK TO ME
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Me, faced with a shiny new story idea: Save it for the Inklings Challenge, save it for the Inklings Challenge, please save it for the Inklings Challenge, I'm begging you please save it for the Inklings Challenge
#adventures in writing#the idea engine is warming up#by now i've got a certain sense of what kind of stories i generate for the inklings challenge#mash up one of the genres with another work or genre and create some half-baked world#the most recent is: the boxcar children as a portal fantasy#older sister and middle brother and younger sister the oldest no more than eleven or twelve#fantasy world royalty who flee from danger (probably an evil usurping uncle who wants to kill them like it's the aristocats)#and stumble into our world#and have to have all sorts of orphan adventures as they figure out how to survive#scrounging for supplies#setting up housekeeping in the woods or in some kind of abandoned building#figuring out our world and making friends#which they're going to need once the evil uncle's forces come after them#it would be so so middle grade and so derivative and such cheesy earnest fun#telling you about it now because it's the type of story idea that loses its luster in 24 hours#and i'll probably never write it#but also it can go on an inklings list and who knows#maybe three days before the deadline this one will pop up as a viable option for this year
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Every now and then I remember Shuuji Kayama and how his arc is one big metaphor for what it's like to grow up instilled with venomous self-hatred and how it turns you cruel towards others and yourself- how it's about falling victim to the cycle and growing up to become yet another chain in the harm but also how it can consume you and destroy you completely-
BUT there's still hope in his story- hope that he can break free with the right support and guidance- with a wake-up call and a better role-model- and not only learn how to love himself but start the journey on getting better and doing better to those he's hurt along the way- because Lopmon is both his victim and himself and I-
#sorry it's almost 5 am and I watched a video on Digimon Survive and remembered how much I care for Shuuji and his story#I saw so much of my past self in that sad angry scared 16 year old boy#his bad end to me is both so easily read as literal and metaphorical death of self#to those of us who do not survive and do not grow up in the literal sense#and those who grow up to be yet another part of the cycle... to become another monster#two things I feared so greatly#but there's hope... Shuuji can be saved...#listen stories about imperfect victims will never not get me weak and weepy- esp. with regards to child victims
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an idea i invite anyone else to write about / run with lol....
the premise that The Change gets all messed up for alberto, say it's something that can happen from stress, &/or happens rarely and you just have to wait for it to resolve itself....used as some parallel to struggling through some emotional turbulence / upheaval / questioning / Realizing Things, etc etc
#luca 2021#pixar luca#alberto scorfano#another idea i've failed to write for & so invite anyone else to run with: ciao alberto but what if he peaces out by swimming off lol#ends up in a coastal town maybe an hour's swim from genoa. but not Getting In Touch w/anyone for a while b/c plausibly he thinks that#giulia may not be a fan of him now by extension; just being too embarrassed asf to reach out to luca kinda lol....luca off doing his own#thing just fine & alberto not wanting to write him now like b/c i Ruined Everything again ahaha....#and by ''not in touch w/anyone for a while'' who knows. months; a few years even....might stumble across news of him b/c like.#say more sea folk are coming to land / more humans know abt them & not many places are as [harpoon]ly from the start anyways#portorosso exceptional in that way....maybe where alberto settles down they're like legendary but also considered Good Luck anyways lol.#anyways like some people know of him who might; say; swim down to portorosso. have their own teen who knows a teen who mostly lives on land#most convenient re sparking [wow could they mean Our alberto] if he doesn't go so far as to take up an alias lol. but why would he....#that difference in that massimo might figure that however alberto was surviving before; he could continue to do so now; but even though tha#is some comfort it's still Not Actually Enough....feeling way more Parentally towards alberto than his biological dad like that; obv#and anyways re: this [The Change gets messed up] idea it's more of an inconvenience lol but one that could still have some significance#like if he first finds out the issue exists via hopping right into the ocean; failing to change forms; never being human form'd in water b4#thee worst....crash intro course to the experience of drowning. observation of How Humans Swim / being able to grab any part of the boat...#and besides That unpleasantness it's like; hey. where's my nonhuman form at#or; of course; being in sea form even while dry....especially if he's still dealing with Nonsense on land. which is presumed.#&/or if there's an upswing in nonsense b/c of Other ways you're Othered...ofc we can consider like; tfw you're a gay fish & maybe that's no#something that on its own would be like Aah until it's like well a) i kinda wanna do things that would make this Visible and b) i've learne#that humans also Have Issues about this kind of thing....#appropriately my tablet was also all thrown off. no pressure sensitivity; input sensitivity overall was rough#but i would've had to restart my laptop about it lol like eh i'll just work around it
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my last desperate attempts to get some attacks in,,, that's all folks o7
for Macy, Newtiepatootie, @spiritumantophila, @pocket-ghostie, f0restcryptid, PiggyAncer, @element-kitten-klaws, and @hershelchocolate!
#artfight#af 2024#I STILL MADE MORE ATTACKS THAN I DID LAST YEAR. SOMEHOW.#other's ocs#artists on tumblr#willow's art#imagine if i hadn't been killed to death this month. imagine how fucking many attacks i would've made. i bet you can't even imagine. /silly#i'm super proud of myself i did it i survived another year
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ngl the one thing that could make me drop rooting for G entirely is if he posted something in support of the orange cheeto like that douche canoe wife of his (im hoping sid, who seems to have a good head on his shoulders, might be a bigger influence)
#i cant take another four years of idiocy i really cant#i literally might not survive it lol#funny how these things work out#im probably gonna ignore the election results on this blog entirely guys#i just cant with how fragile my health is right now#and how each day is still a struggle to keep surviving my own body
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head in hands like "maybe i should have realized this about myself sooner" as i am surrounded by neon flashing signs that Very Clearly Indicate the thing i should have realized about myself sooner
#anyway i'm just mulling about the 'tism skdjfhgljhdfg#thinking about how i've been having a hard time on site with my internship because i struggle to make small talk with my superiors#and everything is uncomfortable and terrible all of the time and i feel so so out of my depth#but talking with my university superior about the methodology of our profession#has me feeling like i'm playing just dance on extreme and i'm nailing every single beat w#like quite literally is like one of those rhythm games where when you get a combo it plays a cool sound effect#and i'm playing so well the sound effects are overlapping and the screen is just an explosion of stars w#so yeah i am. very comfortable talking academics and theory and things but. shit in social situations.#when i don't have that to rely on whoops#anyway it's just another thing on the incredibly long list of things i have building in my mind of#'why i should have realized i'm probably on the spectrum sooner'#the thrilling sequel to 'how did i go 20+ years without realizing i have ADHD' w#(speaking of)#(the way my ADHD has been leaping into the spotlight this week)#(biggest highlight was being jumpscared not once)#(not twice!!)#(but THREE times by food i had bought for myself)#(put down briefly)#(and then forgotten about for upwards of 30 minutes to 5 hours)#(like the other day i bought myself a little pastry on the way home as a congrats for surviving another week)#(and i put it on the table when i came inside)#(but i. forgot i did that. and went like 4 hours without even thinking about it)#(until i got up and left my room and saw the bag and went '! ! ! ! ! ! ! OH MY GO D MY PASTRY NOOOOOOO')#(the adhd and the autism . . . . they are attacking my ass . . . . . )
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I can be normal about Random Crits in TF2.
#team fortress 2#tf2#IhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethemIhatethem#yeah I'm aware it's a janky 17 year old game#I'm aware Valve is probably never gonna turn em off and that community servers exist BUT#when I randomly crit another player I feel nothing and when I die to one I feel a Zealous rage not seen since the Crusades#Yeah I may be a Spy player. yeah I might have gotten random crit several times in one fucking game when I otherwise would maybe survive#AND how it disproportionately screws over Spy because in order to do his main gimmicks he has to be in melee range#oh yeah and did I mention melees have the ability to have upwards of 60% random crit chance?#Sure when other people insta-kill someone with a melee it's funny but when I. the Spy player. insta kill someone#Rare high moments my pasty white ASS#not to mention how dispraportionately these benefit some classes (demo#look.it's basic math#the lowest crit chance on a ranged weapon is what 6%?#so 1 out of every 20 or so shots will random crit#(don't ask me how this shit works for sustained damage classes like Heavy and Pyro)#most servers are 24 players right?#so if everyone shoots at the same time odds are at least 1 player is going to get a random crit#multiply that by how ever many hundreds of shots are fired over the course of a game and suddenly it isn't so rare#and suddenly those “rare high moments” aren't so rare any more#not to mention how it benefits classes like demo. soldier. and pyro because of their wide area of effect#jank hit reg makes you miss a stab and now the medic's aware of you? BAM random crit from an Ubersaw#trying to bait an engie away from his sentry you just sapped? BAM Random Crit from a wrench#I think there's a good reason you never see a random triple damage bonus in any other FPS game ever
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anyway it's such a classic dragon age game experience to go 'ahhh you know i had fun with that game and am gonna play it repeatedly and love every aspect of it possible, but with the intention of headcanon'ing and filling in the gaps in my brain and fanfic and fanart until it becomes The Perfect Media. to me'
#veilguard spoilers#rip to the people who survived off headcanon for 10 years so every new canon bit hurts#same to the people who planned rooks in advance. while i ADORE rook's personality i know it's rough out there#i'm with you partially but mostly in i thought we'd get a lot more grit than we actually got#i also thought we'd get longer romances but boy i was wrong#they really said 'figure it out yourselves' with a majority of it#so now it's up to me myself and i to headcanon new bits of lore#when i get my hands on the artbook all that shit's just going right into the 'this should be canon' memory vault#this happened in inquisition too. i vividly recall the disappointment this site felt towards story beats#like it's actually uncanny how similar the responses are esp on here vs the fandom on other sites#so i think veilguard will probably be beloved by people while we wait another 10 years for a new game#she just needs time to emit fumes people will eventually get used to
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