#how to break a curse as human in Elfhame

[cromulentreader]

I love this scene from the first part of TWK.

Up to this point, Jude at least pretended to follow faerie ways. But here, instead of bargaining, invoking her status as seneschal or getting a faerie to sort it on her behalf, she went: "NOPE, do what I want, or I am dismembering you - here, right now. And I'll say you liked it."

[beloved-daydreams]

Y'all we actually NEED to talk about how loving and caring Wren actually is. Like, from her flashbacks with Bex (Rebecca) we know that she was the emotional shy kid. That her sister would bring her to hang-out with her friends (maybe because Wren didn't have any or too little.) And how she would always play the role her sister would give her.

Flash forward to the present, Wren:

Breaks into the house of her family at night only to eat food from their garbage and maybe do the dishes sometimes. Like???? That's SO unnecessarily nice. Imagine thinking a monster is downstairs only to find out in the morning that the dishes are clean, the laundry has been folded, the place has been cleaned... like what??

She would practice by reading Bex's textbooks to try to educate herself on her own

Breaks the curses put on humans to spite the Faeries (but also I bet she wants to protect humans and be useful to them, like she wishes someone would've been to her) not to mention she's been doing that for YEARS without anyone's thanks. They just get scared and run away

Collects purely sentimental stuff, never does she steal many things that could make her life easier, never does she glamour humans for malicious reasons (and besides, like she said, she's not good at it because her education both in the human world and in the fae world has been lacking)

Again: always eats from garbage, never or rarely fresh stuff she could easily snatch from anyone she wants

Freed some prisoners because she felt like it wasn't right to keep them locked (and well, other more logical reasons BUT I believe 80% of the time Wren is purely acting on her feelings) like, "oh?? I kissed Oak but now he's dancing with other girls? Okay Hyacinthe must be right then, Oak is just a manipulative whore >:( how dare he play with my feeling??"

Felt happy for having Gwen care about her despite them never interacting much to begin with. Just getting those text messages was enough

Probably lots of other stuff I forgot

Anyway, the point is that: Wren is sweet and sentimental and emotional and she knows it. It makes so much sense that she's scared shitless of loving Oak because she KNOWS her feelings are strong. It's what she acts upon most of the time, it's what leads her decisions.

And now she just gave in to some of her "darker" feelings. That feeling of destruction she talked about.

Anyway. Sorry but I'm FERAL over the fact that Wren is just SO full of love yet she receives so little. We need to change that real quick cause now she got everything. Mellith's heart, Mab's bones and Greenbriar blood (Oak). Girlie could literally make anything happen so if we don't want Elfhame's doom, please give her lots of cuddles and appreciation and love. Thank you.

On a side note: I am actually SO scared for Wren's story to end badly. I suppose not but I've only read The Folk of The Air trilogy from Holly Black so I'm not sure how she usually writes her other stories. Please someone reassure me haha :')

[cruelprincae]

we have to establish something: wren has the power of annihilation. pure, raw, untamed power that dates back to Mab's era due to the Storm Hag, Bogdana, creating her with Mellith's cursed heart, which basically maintained her power. and even though we have seen her kill Fae ( aka her mother, who quite literally abused her her entire life so one could say that time, her judgement was clouded by a swirl of emotions and she did not know what she was doing ) now she is actively trying to weave the magic out of Elfhame. the Cursed Kings ( tm ) were put in their earthly prison when Mab was still young, and since we have established that Mab was born a good couple of eons before humanity was even a thought, that means they are old. ancient. and to be put there by Mab means they were a threat to all she had created, so I can only assume they will not just sit down to have tea with Cardan & Jude and just discuss the passage of eras and catch up on some good old gossip. she is building an army so she can snuff out cardan & friends because she considers them responsible for all the wrong doings in her life as both wren, and also mellith. because mind you, cardan IS mab's great grandson, descendant of the power who wronged mellith & had her killed. he has half her power. he can create life like mab. he even looks like her. and what we all know is that if the person responsible for one's wrath is not there to take it, then the 'debt' is passed down to her kin. aka cardan, jude & the possible unborn child of theirs on the way. yes, this book has a 10-year-old time jump from the queen of nothing. cardan is now 30 yo, he is wiser, he has probably had time to harness whatever power he has to a moderately adequate degree. but this man was not aware of his power for a good portion of his life. when he was 17, as wren now is, he was still getting abused from balekin and that aided in the stunt of his power until he became independent and chances are, there are still residues of such trauma. cardan hasn't had time yet to reach his full potential at 30 ( has he even created anything yet? does he even know how? ) and here wren is, at 17, breaking ancient curses and at her power's peak because, unlike cardan's, her power is fueled by the untamed rage she's feeling. she has the advantage. on top of that, we were told in the stolen heir that cardan is recovering from a nasty murder attempt which has probably rentered him weak. he can't possibly fight wren this soon and that's probably why we haven't seen him and jude thus far in. so unless cardan has a miracle up his sleeve, when he confronts wren ( he has to, she has kidnapped his heir & the person he considers a son ) he will lose. most likely he will die. that's what wren wants. but what wren does not understand is that his power of creation and her power of annihilation are woven together. one cannot exist without the other because that's the balance the Storm Hag set with her curse ( that for mab to create, she had to keep the heart alive. likewise, for the heart to beat, mab's descendants had to live and that's why she was forbidden & cursed from harming them ). if wren destroys cardan, she will go down swigging too. likewise, if cardan harms wren, he will suffer the same fate. so we are literally at square 0, with a debt that cannot be paid.

tho bogdana, mellith's ( and consequently wren's ) mother aids her, it is clear she is scheming for her own reasons and not out of motherly love. their interests just align, that's why she's helping wren. what bogdana actually wants, the reason why she has been chasing cardan since the getgo, is her power back. cardan is the vessel who holds mab's power. the power bogdana gave up to mab in exchange for mab to raise mellith. since mellith is dead and wren is a disobedient child, she wants her power back so she can be restored to what she was. she wants the power she gave up! but hey, cardan is one person. who are the they she mentions? easily enough, mab's power was somehow divided, that much we know. part of it was passed down to cardan while the other remains in her bones, which we have seen are already in wren's possession. wren's, not bogdana's. obviously she wants the bones and cardan to channel back her power. but since cardan was BORN with that power, taking it from him, messing up with his core this badly, will kill him. and even if fate is kind enough to somehow, somewhat spare him, there will be very, very little of cardan left so she might as well show mercy and kill him dead. what we also conclude is that the longer cardan and wren use their power, the further they abuse it without a break to recharge their essence, the more it will drain them. wren looks sick. she is feverish. she is breaking curses and unweaving magic left, right and center. she is literally destroying herself. and i am betting that if cardan was somehow determined to figure out his power as well, this is something, he too, faces. i am willing to bet the reason why he is so slow to recover is because he was harmed by iron, yes, but his body was already somehow compromised by the magic. a theory of mine, still, but backed up b this:

does this remind you of something? because it sure as hell does me:

cardan went through the same thing when he came back from the dead. he obviously utilised some sort of power that revived him, aside from the curse's restoration as a Fae. He was holding Jude, not only because he missed her and was overwhelmed from his death but because having used a huge chunk of power ( avoiding death time after time sure is not 'hey let's make a sandwich out of thin air' type of light magic ), chances were if she were to let go, he would fall. she was actually the only solid thing in the world for him right then and there. anyway, rant's over. this is my character study. i have grown so good at reading holly black's interpretations that nothing misses my eye anymore. everything, no matter how minor IS a crucial detail and that is what makes her reading the most enjoyable.

[whimsicaldragonette]

Blog Tour and Arc Review: The Buried and the Bound by Rochelle Hassan

Welcome to my stop on the Buried and the Bound book tour with Colored Pages Blog Tours. (This blog tour is also posted on my Wordpress book blog Whimsical Dragonette.)

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Book Info:

TITLE: The Buried and the Bound AUTHOR: Rochelle HassanPUBLISHER: Roaring Press Books RELEASE DATE: January 24, 2023 GENRES: YA Fantasy PAGES: 384 REPRESENTATION: BIPOC, Queer

Click "read more" for buy links, synopsis, author info, my review, and favorite quotes.

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Synopsis:

As the only hedgewitch in Blackthorn, Massachusetts—an uncommonly magical place—Aziza El-Amin has bargained with wood nymphs, rescued palm-sized fairies from house cats, banished flesh-eating shadows from the local park. But when a dark entity awakens in the forest outside of town, eroding the invisible boundary between the human world and fairyland, run-of-the-mill fae mischief turns into outright aggression, and the danger—to herself and others—becomes too great for her to handle alone.

Leo Merritt is no stranger to magical catastrophes. On his sixteenth birthday, a dormant curse kicked in and ripped away all his memories of his true love. A miserable year has passed since then. He's road-tripped up and down the East Coast looking for a way to get his memories back and hit one dead end after another. He doesn't even know his true love's name, but he feels the absence in his life, and it's haunting.

Desperate for answers, he makes a pact with Aziza: he’ll provide much-needed backup on her nightly patrols, and in exchange, she’ll help him break the curse.

When the creature in the woods sets its sights on them, their survival depends on the aid of a mysterious young necromancer they’re not certain they can trust. But they’ll have to work together to eradicate the new threat and take back their hometown… even if it forces them to uncover deeply buried secrets and make devastating sacrifices.

Author Bio:

Rochelle Hassan grew up reading about dragons, quests, and unlikely heroes; now she writes about them, too. She is the author of the middle-grade novel The Prince of Nowhere and young adult fantasy novel, The Buried and the Bound. She lives in New York

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My Rating: ★★★★★

My Review:

This was phenomenal! It was just the right amount of dark for me - full of creeping dread and a constant level of darkness that you don't usually find in fantasy books. Like a Sabriel level of darkness. There were plot twists upon plot twists, and always revealed at the exact right time to make an impact and change the direction of the plot. And while the groundwork was carefully laid, several of them took me by surprise.

I never felt like the plot was forced into the 'standard' YA formula. I was dreading a typical love triangle and am so relieved that this is not that at all. In fact I love this, the bonds between each of the characters, the secrets and the trust. I have become used to checking the percentage on my kindle as a way to gauge what will happen next - but that didn't work here. The story shifted and changed and breathlessly barreled towards the end without ever letting up or falling into the standard back and forth I am used to. I loved it and I couldn't tear myself away.

I LOVED the characters. Aziza is practical and competent and I loved seeing her grow as a hedgewitch. Leo was warm and caring and it hurt to see the effects of the curse on him. Tristan was desperate and in a lot of pain and I really felt for him. I loved how their lives slowly twined together as the story progressed, and how three seeming strangers became inseperable and bound together. I can't wait to see where the next installment takes them.

I love how the story explored the boundaries and margins of things. The way Leo fought constantly against the edges of his curse. The practicalities and difficulties of Tristan being homeless. The way Aziza spent her time protecting the boundary between Blackthorn and Elfhame. The way the hag pushed up against both of those and was neither. The boundaries between love and friendship and trust and curses and lies.

The darkness was all-encompassing and weighed on everything, but there was just enough light to counter it that it never felt too oppressive or too much.

The writing was gorgeous. It was absolutely perfect for the story, and there were phrases that really stood out to me and stuck with me because of how beautiful they were. Darkly beautiful, but beautiful all the same.

I am SO glad it's going to have a sequel(s) because I don't want to leave this world or these characters and there is so much more to be discovered.

I would recommend this to people who enjoyed Garth Nix's Old Kingdom books (Sabriel), Libba Bray's Great and Terrible Beauty trilogy, Holly Black's Cruel Prince trilogy and Darkest Part of the Forest, Margaret Rogerson's Vespertine, Lynn Flewelling's Nightrunner series, and maybe also Melissa Marr's Wicked Lovely series. Stories of magic and darkness and terrifying, creeping evil and traditional fae and characters who are determined and hold just enough light to counter the darkness of their worlds.

*Thanks to NetGalley, Macmillan Children's and Colored Pages Blog Tours for providing an early copy for review.

Favorite Quotes:

Even on four legs, it was taller than either of them and broader than the two of them combined: a wolf blacker than black, as dark as the space between the end of a dream and the moment of waking.

---

Her roots weren’t there; they were here in Blackthorn, not only because she’d been born here, not only because her parents had chosen it, but because it had chosen her. And Aziza chose it back. That was how you made a place your home: You put work into it. You carved out a role for yourself. You made yourself belong even if you weren’t sure you did.

---

If they could’ve cut him up into pieces and kept only the parts they found acceptable, they would’ve done it in a heartbeat. No, they hadn’t loved him. They hadn’t even liked him.

---

Leo’s car was a bucket of rust held together with duct tape and hope. It whined, it groaned, it sputtered threateningly anytime Leo turned left — but as Leo put what must have been all his weight on the pedal and the car lurched into motion, it was a chariot of the fucking gods.

---

She sounded calm, and she felt it, too, the cool practicality that came of being in a situation that was so completely fucked that your mind tricked itself into not being afraid — like cold that was so cold it burned. Fear that ran so deep it became bravery.

---

Overhead, the forest canopy dropped off suddenly, and the night sky gaped down like an audience, silent and breathless.

---

He knew better than most people that Blackthorn was ugly and dangerous sometimes, and its magic was ugly and dangerous sometimes, but the ugly parts of Blackthorn had a right to exist too.

---

Dawn broke sluggishly, with a first sliver of sun like the horizon cracking open an orange eye.

[court-of-forever-undone]

I Knew You’d Come Back to Me

Chapter Two: Slept next to her, but I dreamt of you (Cardan’s POV)

Summary:  While homesick and heartbroken in the mortal world, Jude finds a pile of letters on her doorstep that include an official pardon and a love confession from Cardan. What is supposed to be a happy reunion quickly falls apart when Jude is told Cardan has returned to Nicasia in her absence. 

Cardan is determined to make it up to Jude. 

**This fic is inspired by the love story between Taylor Swift’s characters Betty, James, and August.**

Should you wish to listen: Cardigan | Betty | August

Tags: Multiple POVs, angst and a happy ending, Jurdan, post-wicked king, canon divergence

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Four Months Post Exile

If she has decided that she wishes to stay away and forget about Elfhame, me, then I will forget about her as well. Except that I can’t because for the eternity she has been gone there has been nothing to rid my thoughts of her.

I grab the nearest pitcher of wine, not that they are ever far from my reach as of late, and swallow as much of the tart liquid as I can. At least if I pass out there is a chance I may dream of her, or dream of losing her. But it is a chance I am willing to take.

There is a revel happening, for a reason I cannot remember. Probably honoring some guest that I cannot be bothered to care about at this point. I tend to the kingdom as best as I can for the day, but by the time the dawn is rising I do everything I can to forget the subtle human features that haunt me. The curve of her ear, the flush in her cheeks, the softness of her form.

Since she has been gone there has been an unbearable ache in my chest that only seems to worsen at her memory. I’ve taken back up with a variety of powders that I grew accustomed to at Balekin’s parties. The numbing sensation is highly preferable to the agonizing dread that awaits me in sobriety. At least when time passes differently, I can imagine that she is home again, or at the very least, I can pass more days until she returns.

Her return seems more and more uncertain because despite my letters, she has not come home, nor even responded to them. She has made no inclination that she intends to return, which is ridiculous because she is the queen. When she returns I will have to remember to remind her of all the accusations she threw my way at neglecting responsibilities, meanwhile she has spent months in the mortal world as if waiting for me to come bring her home myself.

I grin at the idea. A trip to the mortal world could quickly end this ridiculous torture. At least I would have the chance to see her in the flesh.

She could get her anger out and then return home with me. At this point, a curse from her lips would sound like music and her fingers curled around my neck would be ecstasy.

In time, that anger might turn to forgiveness and we can all move on from this nonsense.

Present Day

What a dreadful day today has been. I should have returned to my chambers the moment I was given news of a wine shortage because poisoned wine had been found in the castle’s cellars, because that meant I had to suffer through the small council’s bickering mostly sober, followed by hours of grievance hearings from folk. For a kingdom full of people who find me utterly incompetent, they sure do make plenty of pleas to the crown.

Only one hour remains until I can leave the presence of my court and scout for my own wine to drink, poisoned or otherwise.

“Cardan…?” Nicasia said with the air of a question.

I respond with a non-committal sound before glancing in her direction to my left. Again, she had found a seat nearest mine, despite my repeated reminder that she was no longer entitled to that spot. We were nothing beyond friends with a bit of history, even if my entire council, mother, and Nicasia herself thought it was ridiculous to prolong a “land-sea” alliance any longer.

I turn back to the conversation I had been ignoring and make an appropriate response, before quickly tuning them out again. Courtiers have nothing better to do than waste my time.

Admittedly, I could see my advisors’ point and I haven’t exactly fought to deny Nicasia’s advances anymore. Not when the one I want has rejected me entirely, favoring a mortal over me and forsaking our kingdom to my inadequate rule.

If I were a kinder soul, I might have been content to see her happy and adjusted to the mortal world, but I am not. I hate myself for sending her away and I hate her just as much for not wanting to return. Every time someone suggests I marry, I want to scream the truth for the entire kingdom to hear.

I married the mortal Jude Duarte. I did it so she would release her hold over me, but I also did it because I wanted to. I wanted to make her my queen and share this dreaded life with her; the powerful, defiant, occasionally murderous, human woman with all her soft features and perfectly odd ears.

Pride be damned. If she returned, I’d allow her anything. She would never need a geas to command me. She was already a ruler, she deserved the credit. The court would eventually adjust to the idea of a human ruler once they recognized her rule. I would lead the most devoted of her court and in our bedroom, I would further prove to her just how devoted I was by spreading --

Nicasia’s hand sliding over my knee snaps me from my thoughts. The touch of her hand felt sickly wrong considering my thoughts of Jude. I brush her hand aside and purposefully ignore the hurt look on her face. I may allow her into my room on nights where even the wine and the powders cannot bring me peace, but she knows I am far too sober and there are too many people around for that.

At the edge of my peripheral I see a dark shadow approaching. The Roach; always a welcomed distraction usually armed with wonderfully bad news.

“Come to tell me of another attempt on my life?” I murmur as he bows down to whisper in my ear.

“You are needed at once, your majesty” the goblin reports.

At that, I laugh but make no effort to move. “There is a first for everything. What is it?” I am happy to use whatever matter it is as an excuse to leave, but I am curious what requires my attention that the spies could not handle themselves.

“Jude has returned. She is waiting to see you.”

His words hit like the hilt of a sword to the chest. I stand, jumping the courtier closest to me.

“I have matters to attend to. Enjoy the rest of your evening.” I say to no one in particular, trying to ignore the loud pounding in my ears as my heart threatens to beat out of my chest.

I begin to follow the Roach out of the room when I feel a hand on my arm.

“What is going on?” Nicasia asks, her eyes wide. I shake out of her grasp.

“It is a matter of great importance that does not concern you.” Instead of moving away, like my body demands to, I move in closer to her so only she can hear me. “I meant my words in the gardens. Do not show up this evening or any evening again.”

Her mouth fell slightly open as water rimmed her eyes. I didn't stay for her response, instead I turned back and followed the Roach into the tunnel, knowing every step was bringing me closer to Jude. As we stalk through the hallways, I cannot slow the questions bombarding my mind.

Did she decide against her life in the mortal world? Did she miss me as I have missed her? What should I say to her? Will she allow me to embrace her? Should I announce her return tonight?

I have envisioned dozens of scenarios of what I would say or do when she returned, but now that she is only a few steps away I have no plan past seeing her, holding her if I can, to make sure she is real and not my imagination come to life.

We take the final turn that I know leads to the headquarters for the Court of Shadows when Livier blocks the doorway.

“Where is she?”

I watch as her face contorts. She opens her mouth to respond before closing it again, clearly unsure how to answer. I don’t have patience for this. I have to see her now.

“Move Livier,” I demand.

How many months has it been since we had fallen asleep together after our vows? How long has it been that I’ve felt her pressed against me?

“Cardan, wait!” She exclaims as I try to move past her. “She doesn’t want to see you.”

I stop dead at her words.

Before I can speak, the Roach asks for me, “What do you mean? She sent us to get him.”

The pixie nods. “Yes. She went to the royal chambers, but she returned soon after and has stated she does not wish to speak.”

I cannot help the bite to my words. “To speak to anyone, or just me?”

Her silence gives me my answer. “Why?” I spit out.

She is on the other side of the wall. It has been months, what about my room could have made her decide against seeing me? A darker thought crosses my mind; what if she has decided to return to the mortal world again? The idea threatens to break me then and there in the dark tunnels beneath the castle.

Livier looks at her companion with unease.

“Why?” I demand again.

The Bomb swallows before explaining, “When she returned, she asked how long you and the Princess of the Undersea had been back together.”

My desperation melted into cruel pitiful laughter. She was jealous of Nicasia, while she had herself a human plaything. The hypocrisy was grand. I wonder how her face would look when I asked about the man and how she could possibly blame me when she broke our vows first. My laughter quickly fizzled into a frozen anger.

I needed to leave before the weight of the situation could bear down on me. In all my imaginations, I never predicted this. I had hoped she’d run to my arms or more realistically, slap me followed up with a kiss. But never returning and refusing to see me.

I want to beg to see her. Beg for her forgiveness. Beg her to stay even if she hates me.

As a king, I have every right to go wherever I please. But as a queen, she has the right to deny entry to anyone. So I turn in the tight hallway and take the turn that leads to my rooms.

She is home. She wouldn’t see me, but she is home, which meant I could fix this. She might not see me tonight, but I would win her forgiveness and maybe her love too.

****

After almost two weeks of announcements and planning, Jude’s coronation ball will begin soon. I have still yet to see her in person, but through messengers and letters she agreed to rule with me and begrudgingly accepted my proposal for a party to celebrate her return and status.

The actual coronation will not take place for another few weeks due to the time needed to gather all the court’s representatives, but this evening would be a full celebration nonetheless. She is home and that enough is cause to celebrate.

The party will also finally force Jude out of the shadows. I suspect she has moved around the castle quite a bit as I heard she met with her sisters and the Living Council, but she has made a careful effort to avoid me.

There have been several times where I have made it all the way to her door before deciding to leave and giving her the space she demands. For months now, I have had dreams of the moment we saw each other again; I have imagined her vulgar words and sweet touches. Tonight is the last night I can imagine because in a matter of hours I will see her again. For the evening, she will have no choice but to stand in the same room as me. I already announced her as my wife and Elfhame’s High Queen. After this evening, she can avoid me outside of official business, if she wishes. It would be devastating, but no more devastating than how it felt when she was gone.

I pace back and forth in my chambers thinking through all the details of the evening since I have nothing better to do. I dressed long ago in a suit twin to the dress I had sent for Jude. If I thought the last dress I designed for her was stunning, I am not sure I’ll be able to survive seeing her in tonight's creation. I gave the tailor a sketch of a silver gown with a fitted bodice and twin streams of fabric that flow from the shoulders. The hope was to create an illusion of the armor she seemed to favor. I doubt the tailor will disappoint and frankly, Jude could wear an old sack and still be devastatingly beautiful.

Before long I receive the signal to head to the ballroom. As I enter the room, I admire for the first time the servant’s efforts to fulfill my image for the evening. The decoration for a typical revel was nothing compared to the fanfare visible this evening. Long strings of lights and streamers hung from the ceiling and sweet and savory treats of all varieties are piled high on trays. The musicians and other entertainment for the evening are already in full swing keeping the guests happy and amused.

As is customary, the party has been going on for some time now, before the king and now queen enter. The center of the space is filled with revelers dancing and singing. At any other party, I would have gladly joined, but I cannot help the pooling sense of unease as I glance through the crowding looking for a particular face.

I do find the face I am looking for, but not the right person. Taryn is standing on the side of the dance floor chatting with some courtier. Locke is nowhere to be seen, which is for the best. If I notice him even causing Jude to frown this evening, I will have him locked in the dungeons for the night.

I occupy myself with some wine while I wait and use the opportunity to boast of Jude’s brilliance to anyone who decides they wish to speak with me. After about a dozen of these conversations, I finally catch a glimpse of her walking into the room with Vivianne at her side.

My Jude.

I admire her with total abandon. She is absolutely stunning. The movement of her steps causes the fabric to shimmer as it flows obscenely over her body. While I will imagine her in this dress for many nights to come, it is the crown that sits atop her head that captures my attention.

The crowd cheers at her arrival and many bow to her. While she keeps her emotions well concealed, I can see the smallest of smiles appear on her face. She enjoys the recognition. Seeing her now, if I could have given her this from the start I would have.

My heart-stopping queen.

I stay to the side where I am and watch her enjoyment from afar. She dances with her sisters from time to time and speaks to members of the gentry with ease. I know she has noted my presence, even if she has yet to look in my direction. When it is time to address the crowd, it is my turn to avoid her direction. I keep my speech to the folk short, enough to praise her and remind anyone who may be considering treason exactly who Jude Duarte is. At the final toast, I steel myself before addressing her directly.

“Welcome home, Jude.”

Our eyes meet for the briefest of moments, burning with a million unspoken words before she breaks away and turns to address the now-growing crowd around her.

It was the first time she acknowledged me since the morning I sent her away and suddenly the emotion behind that realization hits me all at once. I let my eyes linger on her turned back a moment longer, before downing my drink and disappearing into the gardens to wallow in my own self pity.

I told myself I would be happy if she just returned home, but now I realize how badly each moment I spend away from her aches. In school, I hated the way I longed for her. I had chalked it up to being a disgraceful obsession; one I would have been glad to be rid of whatever that meant for Jude. Now, I am equally obsessed with my mortal queen, but rather than having just my thoughts occupied with her, I feel a feral desperation to be near her, to set things right with her.

It is not uncommon for me to be followed, but when I hear soft steps behind me, the last person I expect to turn and see is Jude. Her brown eyes widened in surprise, as if she was not the one following me. We both stare at each other for a half a second too long, before Jude mumbles something and turns to leave. I take her by the arm before she can take a single step away. I won’t let her get away a second time.

“Ask me how hideous you look tonight,” the words tumble from my mouth before I can stop them.

She turns back to face me. I loosen my hold on her arm, but let my hand linger until she decides to brush it away.

“This again?” She asks, sounding more tired than annoyed. I didn’t realize how much I missed her voice.

Desperate to hear her again, I reply, “I can’t. You look like a knight from a story tonight.” A filthy story, perhaps.

Jude’s cheeks pinken as she shifts away from me. If I wasn’t afraid to lose her, I might have found her unease at my closeness cute.

“I’m glad to see the kingdom is still in one piece.” Jude acknowledges, changing the subject away from her. The distance between us feels infinitely greater than the foot of space physically separating us. I’d give anything to embrace her now.

“I had help,” I state simply. It is the truth. The Court of Shadows kept tabs on everyone, friends and enemies, and the Living Council for all the headaches they cause me, they did their job as well.

“Nicasia?” Jude didn’t try or simply failed to hide the accusation in the question.

I sigh heavily and take a seat on one of the garden’s benches. “Ahh that. Yes, it is about time we talked.” I motion for her to join me, to which she refuses.

“I don’t want to hear anything about the two of you. I understand we married out of political strategy, I won’t hold you to human standards of monogamy.” Jude echos my sigh, “After your letters, I thought… Well, I misunderstood the situation.”

My core twists at the way her voice trembled on the words. When did her pain stop being cruel amusement and instead became a twin knife that hurts us both?

“I meant every word in those letters” I murmured softly. How many times had I imagined this conversation before?

Anger burns across her face, “So, what? You got bored of waiting for me to return from the exile YOU-” she jams her pointer finger into my chest hard enough to bruise, “ordered! Maybe next time make sure your letters are actually delivered or perhaps don’t send me away in the first place.”

I stand, challenging her anger with my own. “You think I wouldn’t have waited? I went to bring you home. I saw you dancing with the mortal. Don’t pretend I was the first to stray.”

I expected more anger, denial perhaps, but not... confusion?

“What the hell are you talking about? I haven’t been with anyone else,” Jude yells exasperated.

“The blond male. I came to see you and…” I trail off when Jude laughs suddenly. “What could possibly be funny?”

She covers her face with her hands, shaking her head side to side, “Cardan, you saw me with a friend. Nothing ever happened between us, ever.”

Shame washes over me like a tidal wave. I had returned from that trip thinking Jude had made her decision to forget me and stay behind. I had walked straight into a revel and drank every drop of wine in sight. Nicasia found me a few hours later laying in the grass outside the castle and when she came near I did the one thing I thought would make me feel better.

Nicasia had been the first to notice me, my first real friend then lover. After Jude, I thought she could be the thing I needed again, but I was wrong. It didn’t take long for me to realize it would never be as it was before because my heart still belonged to Jude. If I had only spoken to Jude that night in the mortal world, none of this would have happened.

“I believed the reason for your continued absence was because you were still mad. I thought I could go to the mortal world and convince you to come home, but I saw you with the mortal man. I did not handle the thought of you with another well. Nicasia was there when I got back and… I let her into my bed, but it was you that I thought of every moment you were gone.”

Several emotions ripple across her face before she quickly schooled her face into the impenetrable mask she wears around others. She wears around me too. I continue before the fear of her rejection can stop me.

“There are no tricks within my words, so please hear me when I promise you, Jude, mortal High Queen of Elfhame, it is you I love. My heart is yours and forever will be. There will be no other’s, and if you choose to have me again, it will only be you.”

I raise my hand to cup her face and watch as her eyes flutter close. My name falls off her lips like a plea and I think it might be the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. I lower myself to meet her soft lips. Her hands soon find the front of my jacket and I don't fight when she tugs me closer to her.

Without breaking the kiss, I use my free hand to grip her lower back and pull her back into the garden seat with me. On my lap, Jude opens herself up to me and I greedily take in more of her, missing the taste of her. I can’t help but continue to caress her body with my fingertips, long after we break to catch our breath. I place a series of kisses along her neck, each more drawn out than the last before I speak the cruel fact still on my mind, “of all my terribleness, the worst thing I ever did was what I did to you.”

It hurts knowing I can speak those words aloud. I reach up to wipe a stray tear that has fallen from her eyes.

“Will you have me again, Jude?” My heart pounds in the wake of the question. I watch as she considers it. Truthfully, I wouldn't blame her if she refused me, but it would be torturous to have her so near and not mine.

Slowly, she gives a subtle nod and I don’t hide my sigh of relief. She stares at me for a second longer, before smiling, “I love you, Cardan."

I capture her lips again, finding her more addictive than the sweetest wine.

“My sweet nemesis, how glad I am you have returned.”

Tag List: @wafflesandschemingfaces​ 

If anyone else would like to join the list, let me know! 

[visd3stele]

Oak and the throne

summary:

TW: none

A/N: I always hoped Jude and Cardan would keep the throne, so I'm glad Oak likes the mortal world so much :)

Next one should be up by thirsday

Thank you so much for the request, hope it's what you expected. xoxo

@britishbookworm2 requested here

masterlist

"Oak! Come back here," Jude's voice carried through the palace. Despite years of dealing with stubborn faes in the council, eliciting orders to soldiers and servants alike and talking down to her subjects as Cardan does, her voice was steady, even and almost sweet as she yelled after her little brother.

Little brother. The thought seemed out of place. In his years in the mortal world, Oak had a growth spurt, while she remained the same. Young, not yen an adult, yet passed through much more than her elders could claim to.

"No!" Oak shouted back, though he stopped in the middle of the throne room. "No," and he turned back to Jude, walking fast with his now bigger, stronger goat legs. "You promised me I won't have to take over if I don't want to. Well, guess what, Jude? I don't!"

He didn't tower over her like she expected. His bent knees cutting from his height. But Oak, the boy she used to lean down to hug and kiss on top of his horned head, still stood taller than her at the throne's dais.

"You should have taken it in writing, little brother." Cardan chimed in, bemused. A glare from his wife shut him up, though still smirking, and the High King opened a second bottle of wine.

"Oak," Jude begin again. "I know it's not ideal. When all this started, you were so young. I get it's a little scary and overwhelming. But it's your birthright..."

"It's Cardan's birthright too." Oak protested, crossing his arms over his chest after pointing a hand towards the King sitting on the throne's dais. His tail bounced left and right in amusement as he raised the bottle towards his half brother and gulped down a mouthful of wine.

"Speaking of Cardan," Jude seized the opportunity, "he didn't want to be High King either. But he got used to it. He came to like it. Tell him, oh, dear husband." The look the High Queen gave her lover contradicted her words, for nothing short of a clear threat shone in her eyes. The fae just smiled to himself, used to his wife's antics. He made a show of getting up on his feet, taking a few steps forward with his normal care free elegancy, when Oak's words stopped him.

"If he likes it that much, why can't Cardan still be King? I thought you liked to be Queen, too, Jude. Don't you?"

Both the warrior mortal and the peaceful fae stood glued in their places. Perplexed. Twenty years ago, when she started her ascension to the throne, Jude did so with only one purpose in mind: put that crown on Oak's head. Every decision she made, each plotting and scheming should have led to the celebration of High King Oak of Greenbriar line. Didn't it?

Now that she thought about it, things changed. Jude couldn't say when or how exactly. But at some point between then and now, she started to see herself as the real queen. High Queen in her right, not just a replacement until Oak is old enough.

Maybe it was when she choose to love Cardan and he made her his equal by splitting the throne in two ostentatious ones right in the middle of the room. Maybe it was when the Court of Shadows gifted her the title as a nickname. Jude wouldn't admit even to herself how much though she'd given to that afterwards. Or maybe it was recently, in the years after breaking Cardan's curse. Years spent ruling together, bringing up a better Elfhame than either of them grew up in.

As for Cardan, the High King's eyes darted to the crown, fingers itching to pick it up and place it atop his head. To give it a light push so it'd lean on one side, but never falling. As if it clinged to him. As if it chose him.

It's true, the youngest prince - as he thought himself for so long - never craved the throne. Why would he? He was the least favorite child, not good enough to deserve their father's attention. His mother's love. So how could he be a good king? But after Jude tricked him and all Elfhame bowed to him, looked up to him, something shift inside him. Cardan actually enjoyed the process of thinking through a court scheme. The insides of a carefully given order - a pawn in a bigger game. He found it entertaining to search ways to deal with the council, to make them bow to his whims. And when he married Jude and those whims matured into interests, well, building a kingdom of dreams none he or his wife dared to ever hope for, leaving such a legacy behind, he, Cardan Greenbriar, the pitiful prince, it felt right.

"You don't wish to rule, Oak?" Cardan asked, more concern than he ever spoke with lacing his voice.

"No! Never did, never will."

Jude could recognize a bit of Vivi in the way Oak said it, rolling his eyes and putting accent on certain vowels. But Vivi insisted it wasn't unusual in the mortal world, humans using this sort of speech all the time. Thinking about it, seeing her little brother clear for the first time she summoned him in Fairyland, Jude realized Oak would look out of place in fae's clothes. The green hoodie he wore and dark grey jeans fitted him perfectly.

"But would you be alright there? Hiding your real self, your magic?"

"I'm not hiding, Jude," Oak's voice softened. His big sister didn't want to ruin his life. She was looking after him, his happiness in the only way she knew how. The Fae way. "I mean, yes, people see what I want them to, what with the glamour and all. But it doesn't mean I don't get to be myself. I go to college, you know? Herbologist," he chuckled to himself. "I like it. I have friends, and... and one day, when I'll meet my Heather, then I'll skip to telling her the truth and... I don't know what then, but it'll be fine. I'll be fine, Jude. I promise."

It took several minutes for Jude to reply. She eyed Oak the entire time, her mind swerling, trying to keep up with the speed of her thoughts. Eventually, she saw his truth, just like when she faced hers own: she wouldn't fit in the mortal world, she loved Cardan, she was the High Queen. And Oak? Oak would make a great herbologist - whatever that was - because he doesn't fit in Elfhame anymore. And she won't be the one to crush him or his hopes.

She nodded her head, Cardan's cue to drop a silly, drunk-like, huge smile and take the crowns in his hands.

"Promise you'll visit, though."

It was Oak's turn to nod, a grin pulling his lips upward. "Of course. I can stay for dinner, if you promise not to offer me a court or something."

Jude laughed. "I think we can do that." She turned to her husband, who hummed distracted and tucked a loose strand behind her year, putting extra effort in to trace the soft, round edge of it with his fingers. Cardan, then, crowned her, tilting his head. To no one's surprise his own tolkien of kinghood didn't fell, despite its crooked position.

"Unless a gift is required by tradition, brother dearest," Cardan said, "fret not. You'll be seeing nothing from us." And without waiting to see if Oak is following, he spooned his wife, his queen, in his arms, leading her to the dining table. All the way there, the king peppered his heart's chosen one with kisses, whispering promising for the night. Silk words about a royal celebration in their suit and implications of a new heir to the throne, now that the one they'd planned for decided to go to a mortal college and stay there.

Oak smiled. Truthfully and heartfully. No, he won't be High King. But he felt like he owned the whole world hours later, when he got back to his dorm and picked up his pen to write some notes on next friday's homework.

[figonas]

As Warm As The Sun-Part 2

The Light of the Moon

The scent of his skin beneath the aroma of sweet wine blurs Jude’s thoughts. She’s tempted to reach for him again, to trace her fingers along his sharp cheekbones; pale as the light from a full moon, dusted softly with incandescent, shimmering gold. 

Summary: Part 2 is Jude’s POV of the scene from Part 1. Takes place during The Wicked King pretty much right before the Queen of Mirth scene and Chapter 15. Just a soft, fluffy response to the prompt; “hug me, I command it”.

Words: 2267

Rating: GA

Links: Part 1-Cardan POV | AO3

A/N: I struggled with Jude’s POV far more than I did with Cardan’s. I think because this is a really vulnerable moment and at this point in her story like Jude isn’t prepared to be vulnerable with Cardan. Idk, this takes place a little early in twk for Jude to be admitting she has feelings for Cardan, but this is fanfic and I do what I want. @jurdanhell this one’s for you my dude.

********

Jude Duarte, former spy for Prince Dain, seneschal to the High King of Elfhame, is exhausted. If she is honest with herself, which she often isn’t, she couldn’t remember a time since Cardan was crowned where she hadn’t been tired. Nearly every day of the last five months there was always something too important going on for Jude to waste time sleeping. There was always a problem to solve, a threat against the kingdom to thwart, an attempt on her life, or Oak’s life, or Cardan’s life. What Jude really needed was a shorter list of lives she was responsible for, but for now, a good night's sleep would have to do. She was almost too tired to be angry at Cardan for having her attend this stupid revel, almost...but not quite.

Early in the night Jude was doing her best to slip away after a meeting with the Living Council, yet another one Cardan had failed to attend and Jude had fought for every word she had to say. As she rushed out of the room she nearly collided with Locke, followed closely by Cardan, Taryn, and a group of court members she didn’t recognize. Cardan’s eyes met hers and Jude knew she was in trouble the moment he got that infuriating gleam in his eye, the look that said; Oh Jude, you will absolutely hate the next words I speak. And hated them she had, Cardan launched into details about that evening’s revel which ended in him asking Jude if she would attend the revel in full that evening, his voice practically dripping with mock innocence. Before Jude could answer with a curt and resounding no, Locke chimed in and did what he was best at; started trouble. By the time he was done with his mocking explanation of why Jude’s many duties robbed all her mortal energy and didn’t allow her to attend revels like the rest of the folk, the Living Council had moved from their meeting place to gather in the hall. Jude briefly entertained a fantasy of running Locke through with Nightfell just to be done with this whole encounter, but she realized Locke’s attempt to devalue her position had garnered a substantial audience so Jude was left with no choice but to clench her jaw and bite out an acceptance of Cardan’s offer.

Now, an eternity later, Jude stands to the side of Cardan’s throne scowling at the side of his horribly beautiful face as he downed the dregs of yet another gobet. She had given up trying to count his cups hours ago but the glazed look in his eyes told Jude it is likely someone would be carrying Cardan back to his chambers this evening. She took a cursory glance around the room eyeing the dwindling guests and the King’s Guard who all made a point to look anywhere but toward the dais, and realized that someone is most likely to be her.

As if on cue, Cardan stands swaying as he attempts to step forward and nearly pitches head first off the dais.

All of Jude’s training, both in Madoc’s house and as a spy for Prince Dain, have honed her reflexes and without a second thought her hand flies out fisting in the back of Cardan’s gaudy cloak of embroidered black velvet. With all the gentleness of someone who has spent the last four hours contemplating murder Jude yanks Cardan back against her and wraps her arm around his waist to steady him.

“As much as it would amuse me to watch you fall after you made me stand here all night for no reason, I’m too tired to pick you up off the floor,” Jude hisses in his ear, she throws his other arm about her shoulders and sets off down the handful of steps leading away from the throne. Cardan leans into her, his breath ghosting across her temple; warm and sweetened by wine, Jude can’t stop the longing that shoots through her like the peeling of a bell.

“Dearest Jude, are you trying to take me to bed?” Cardan’s mouth stumbles through the words, just as his feet stumble down the steps nearly dragging them both to the floor. Jude tries to tap into her anger that seemed so palpable only moments before but she can’t think past his hip pressed against hers, his arm warm and heavy across her neck and shoulders.

“Don’t push your luck or I’ll leave you to sleep on the floor in the middle of the burgh”. He laughs, truly laughs in a way that’s free of anger or malice. Jude tries and fails to suppress the small smile that touches her lips at the happy sound she so rarely hears from him.

The walk to Cardan’s rooms takes a lifetime. They don’t speak again, but Jude can feel Cardan’s eyes on her every few moments. His proximity makes the sensation hard to ignore causing a flush to darken her cheeks. Jude tries to focus on the path ahead and clamp down her desire to return his gaze.

Once in his chambers Jude abruptly releases him and takes a half step away putting much needed distance between them, but even then he’s still too close. The scent of his skin beneath the aroma of sweet wine blurs Jude’s thoughts. She’s tempted to reach for him again, to trace her fingers along his sharp cheekbones; pale as the light from a full moon, dusted softly with incandescent, shimmering gold.

Jude, no the rational voice inside her mind nearly screams. She clenches her hands into fists, a half second from running out the massive wooden door when Cardan’s voice startles her from her thoughts.

“Embrace me again,” he says in a voice that reminds her of another drunken request he made not too long ago; kiss me again, kiss me until I am sick of it.

Jude is weary, worn down, exhausted, the kind of tired that makes limbs sore and heavy as if she’d spent the whole day throwing rocks. In that exhaustion the Cardan-shaped wall built around her heart is lowered more than Jude would ever admit; she had refused him then, she doesn’t know if she can refuse him now.

“Go to bed Cardan” it’s as much of a refusal as she can muster with his eyes boring into hers, black and wanting. Her hand flicks out to point across the suite to Cardan’s ridiculously large bed.

“But I am your king, Jude I command it,” he grins like he’s gone mad but Cardan, who is less a living being than a fae revel given flesh and bone, looks horribly and unmistakably sad. It’s gone in a moment, replaced by feigned indifference so sharp it almost burns in his coal black eyes. But she had seen it there; a glimpse of the depth of his loneliness and misery.

“So I say again, embrace me and then I will concede and go to bed,” his tone is teasing, it does nothing to fool Jude.

She opens her mouth to speak but quickly shuts it. The feeling of slick, slimy guilt roils in her belly, guilt she often pushed aside in favor of anger and self-preservation. Cardan’s pain was not all her doing, she knew of his scars, on his skin and his soul, wrought from Baelkin’s hateful hands and the cruel indifference of Eldred.

But his position as High King, his empty life beneath a hollow crown was one she had thrust upon him through lies and deceit. Facing the truth of that in his eyes made bile crawl it’s way up her throat, and if Jude was honest with herself it shattered her heart into shards of broken glass threatening to shred her apart from the inside.

Guilt was not easy to feel, it was the feeling of admitting you had done wrong paired with the admission that you haven’t yet made it right. Jude had choked on guilt before but usually pushed it away, citing the safety of Oak and the stability of Elfhame; but those excuses fall apart like strips of wet paper when pit against the emptiness in Cardan’s gaze.

Jude curses herself, wishing for the days when she felt nothing but hatred for the High King, instead of the complicated mix of regret, shame, and desire she feels now. Swallowing thickly against her guilt, and before she can examine her own want too closely, Jude steps forward and wraps her arms around him, resting her cheek against his shoulder.

Cardan hesitates for a brief moment, before returning her embrace. Jude resists the urge to sink into his warmth, stops herself from tightening her arms and nuzzling her face into his neck; it’s power over her she won’t relinquish to him and an admission to herself she isn’t ready to face.

More than anything this moment feels fragile, as if Jude, mortal among fairies, human of the earth could break it with the snap of her fingers.

“I’m only doing this because I’m too tired to fight with you about going to bed,” she lies, to herself and to him.

Cardan doesn’t reply, simply holding her in a strong, steady embrace, his cheek resting light as a feather on her forehead. The unsteady balance brought on by Cardan’s overindulgence seems to evaporate as if, he too realizes how delicate this moment is. How easily it could shatter like a stone through glass.

She isn’t sure how much time passes as they stand there tangled up in each other, but her eyelids begin to droop as Cardan strokes lazy circles on her back with his thumbs.

In serious danger of dozing off Jude yawns deeply and steps back. Cardan’s hands bracket her waist as she pulls back and he makes no effort to remove them. The warmth of his palms seeping through her jacket keeps her heart pounding out a steady rhythm. She doesn’t know how to read into this small gesture of intimacy, if it means anything at all, so she simply ignores it.

“Alright, Your Majesty I indulged your wishes,” she stops another, smaller yawn with the back of her hand.

“Now to bed with you so I can go get in my own,” Jude points again in the direction of the vast expanse of pillows and spider silk sheets.

Cardan’s hands drop to his sides, he sways unsteadily as he turns, his drunken clumsiness returning now that the distance between them has broken whatever spell was cast over their embrace. She places a gentle hand on his lower back, when he leans into her touch Jude feels a rush of warmth as she walks him through his empty rooms.

“Careful with your orders Jude or I will tell everyone that you were kind to me,” he laughs though she can’t imagine why.

“Though I don’t think anyone would believe me,” he continues softly almost as if speaking to himself. She shakes her head though Cardan is too focused on his feet to notice. He doesn’t say the words with malice or venom but something twists in Jude’s chest all the same.

“You won’t remember this tomorrow anyway”.

She gives a gentle push as they reach his bed and Cardan flops down on the coverlet, gazing up at Jude in with something soft and yearning in his eyes. She leans over him, breath catching in her throat. The intensity of his gaze pins her to the spot.

“Oh Jude, loveliest of afflictions, I will remember this night for years to come.” He makes a move as if to reach for her, but Cardan’s hand falls back to his side as his eyes flutter closed.

“We’ll see about that tomorrow,” She makes a disbelieving noise and crosses her arms. Laughing softly as she takes in her disheveled High King.

Though Cardan’s eyes remain closed, his head turns in her direction as she laughs, as if he craves her laugh as she craves his; a moth to flame.

Jude backs away from the bed, retreating to the suites main door, but something stops her as she places a hand on the knob. Turning to peer over her shoulder she calls out softly through the dark chamber.

“Goodnight Cardan,” without waiting for his response she slips into the hall and flees toward her room.

By the time she reaches her chambers Jude is dead on her feet and desperate for the feel of her pillow against her cheek.

She strips off her weapons and clothes, tucking herself into bed instead of curling up in front of the fire as she most often does. It’s cold but the sheets and pillows are soft, as she relaxes into them. Sleep hovers nearby waiting to take her the moment she closes her eyes, but Jude stares up toward the ceiling keeping herself awake for a few more blissful moments.

Jude Duarte has made herself into a fearsome creature, one of the folk in spirit if nothing else. Tomorrow she will go back to her role as the High King’s seneschal, back to her knives, and seething looks, and harsh clothes. But tonight she will allow herself one small, indulgent moment of weakness and be simply; Jude Duarte, mortal girl.

Tonight she lies in bed and thinks of Cardan’s soft breath on her cheek, the stroke of this thumb on her back, the moonlight glow of his skin in the dimness of his chambers.

Jude isn’t sure exactly when she drifted off but her dreams are filled with yearning black eyes and strong steady arms. When she wakes she smiles to herself, wide and foolish, before donning the mask of seneschal once again.

[snusbandxknifewife]

Jurdanweek2020 Day 2 pregnancy/labor

Hey y’all so this is based on the story of my birth, because I’ll be damned if my mother didn’t play the part of Jude Duarte while my father acted as Cardan. In this fic, Jude is so sure that their daughter won’t be born on her due date, that she drags Cardan to the mortal world. Things go downhill quickly.

“Cardan shut the fuck up, we are fine!”

Cardan Greenbriar had tried for hours to convince his very stubborn—very pregnant—wife that maybe a trip to the mortal world this close to her due date wasn’t the wisest idea. Naturally, she stomped her foot and crossed her arms over her swollen belly and that was that, off to the mortal world they went.

“Jude, my love, will you at least let me carry your purse?” He would keep trying to help her until she finally snapped and killed him.

Jude wasn’t happy about having to carry a purse now, but she was unable to lean down to strap a knife to her thigh and her breasts had grown too large for her to force a dagger between them without risking injury, so a handbag was her only option to carry her weaponry. Cardan, wisely, had long since decided that questioning his wife’s ability to even wield a knife in her current state wasn’t the smartest move.

She huffed and shoved the bag square into the center of his chest before turning on her heel and waddling her way down the baby aisle of the local Target.

She had no mortal maternity clothing, so she’d settled for wearing a simple dress of flowing silk, held closed by a belt just under her breast and giving way to the large belly that she always kept one protective hand on. Cardan walked closely behind her, his mortal sneakers squeaking against the linoleum floor as he tried not to remind himself that this was very stupid.

Jude Duarte Greenbriar, his wife and the High Queen of Elfhame, had given new meaning to the term stubborn today. As the entire palace tittered with excitement over it being the baby’s due date—she would forever curse herself for sharing that information from her human OBGYN—she’d lost her cool. A strongly worded letter had been sent to every one in her family and any courtier or guard close enough to the royal chambers could hear her screaming at her husband about how “THE BABY WILL NOT BE COMING TODAY SO EVERYBODY CAN JUST LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!”

Then she’d decided that they needed something called a “pacifier,” whatever that was, and next thing he knew they were walking into Target.

Jude had wanted to go alone, but Cardan had been wise enough to insist that Fand and the Bomb accompany them. She’d finally given in, but only once they’d promised to stay out of sight the entire time.

He was, naturally, fucking panicking. Today was their daughter’s due date, and now that Jude had gone and told everyone off, all their family and friends would be preparing for the upcoming Christmas festivities, set for two weeks in the future. They had no way to get in contact with anyone if the worst were to happen.

Jude picked out a set of pink pacifiers with different zoo animals drawn on them. Evidently unsatisfied, she then set about grabbing every baby blanket and stuffed toy she could possibly reach. Cardan was bemused, but chose to hold everything she handed him, rather than fight her.

“Do we need diapers?” She asked, both hands under her belly as she looked over her shoulder.

“Our baby will be fae,” he reminded her. “No need to worry about all that.”

He couldn’t help his snort of laughter as she looked heavenward and thanked the gods.

Then she was back on her quest, looking for something or another that they suddenly, desperately needed for the baby, despite her not even knowing it had existed a few minutes ago. When her eyes catch on a baby pink stuffed lion on the top shelf, she got up on her tippy toes and reached for it, her fingers just barely brushing against its little feet.

Cardan, seeing his wife struggling and being comically taller than her, reached over and plucked the little toy with ease, not noticing how Jude froze when he did.

Her face twisted in anger and disgust and she stomped her foot once more. He, thinking he had somehow offended her by helping her out, was halfway through apologizing before she loudly announced that she thought she’d just peed herself and he needed to go get her new panties while she went to the bathroom.

She left in a flurry of silk skirts and wild hair, headed for the woman’s restroom and leaving her poor husband behind with an armful of baby products and a rogue thought about how uncomfortable it must be for mortals to have to do things like go to the bathroom.

After so long with his Jude, he had come to love all her mortal quirks. Her rounded ears were his favorite part of her body and her dulled senses made it all the easier to surprise her. But he still found himself occasionally wishing that she wasn’t a mortal, now solely because he saw all the discomfort it brought her. Pregnancy had kept her sick and cranky for nine full months. He’d never known a fae mother to have such terrible morning sickness, and he had no idea how mortal women did anything while pregnant, given how often they had to pee.

“I’ll get her the panties.” He about jumped out of his skin when the Bomb popped up behind him, like she’d been lurking just one aisle over and had heard everything.

By this point in the pregnancy, he’d long since learned when he just needed to shut up and go with the flow, so he went about purchasing all the new baby products with a few leaves glamoured to look like mortal money. When he looked up, Target bags hanging from his fingers and handbag firmly situated on his shoulder, his wife was waiting by the exit with her arms crossed.

“The Bomb promised to stay away,” she explained with a scowl. “Why’d she bring me panties?”

“She promised to stay out of sight,” he countered as lovingly as he could in an effort to calm her. “I’d say, as long as she didn’t come in the stall with you, she kept her promise.”

He transferred all the bags to one hand so he could grab hers. Jude, scowl still plastered across her face, took his hand and led him out of the Target.

“I want donuts.” She switched her direction mid-step and started stalking down the sidewalk towards the little donut shop in the same plaza as the Target.

Cardan sat across from her at a two-person table in the donut shop for close to an hour, just watching as she angrily ate three glazed donuts. He’d left their shopping bags outside for Fand to grab and have sent back to Elfhame.

It was as he watched Jude eat her third donut that he began to sense something was amiss. Every so often, his darling little demon of a wife would get inexplicably angrier, her brow furrowing and her nostrils flaring and her teeth grinding down. Then, after a minute or so, she’d go back to her calmer level of pissed off.

As Jude announced that she wanted to go buy something called “pads” for after the baby’s birth, Cardan started paying more attention. He grabbed her handbag and kept his other hand firmly on the small of her back, feeling how she’d tense up for a few minutes and then go back to normal.

Holding Jude’s brand new supply of extra absorbent pads, and the few extra things she’d spent an hour dragging him around the store for, Cardan fully began to panic. Jude’s episodes were getting longer and closer together.

He’d done enough reading to know she was having contractions, and he’d done enough reading to know that when you have contractions two minutes apart, you aren’t getting on a ragwort steed and making it back to Elfhame.

When Jude went to the bathroom again, Cardan was ready for the Bomb.

“She’s in labor,” they announced simultaneously.

“Send word to her sisters and have the healers ready for when we return.” Cardan let out a sigh. “I think we’re having this baby in the mortal world.”

“I’ll call Vivienne.” Just like that, the Bomb was gone.

Cardan could fall to his knees and weep with relief at the reminder that Vivienne lived close. She was only a few minute’s drive away, she would know the way to the hospital, she’d be able to help him get Jude in the damn car.

By the time Jude was out of the bathroom, Vivi had broken a minimum of seven laws to get to them and she was waiting outside the front door, heavy parka pulled up over her pointed ears and dark sunglasses blocking her cat eyes.

“What’s all this?” Jude looked ready to murder Cardan, and he didn’t doubt she could do it even with him having all her knives. “Cardan, I wanted to be alone!”

“Jude, you’re in labor,” he announced, doing his best to keep his voice calm. Internally he was losing it, but he didn’t think that letting her see that would help the situation.

“No I’m no—“ she breaks off with a growl, her face contorting in anger right on time with the counting in Cardan’s head. From his reading and the stories he’d heard, he expected tears or screaming when her contractions got this bad, not to have her hide her pain behind a wall of pure fury.

He opened the car door and threw their shopping bags in, offering a hand to his wife and desperately trying to coerce her into the car. “Darling please, we need to get to the hospital. I don’t know how to deliver a child, and I don’t plan on finding out today.”

“They’re just Braxton-Hicks,” she tries again, almost whining. “I’m not having the baby today!”

“Baby says otherwise,” Vivi calls out from the front seat as Jude once again tenses. “Now get in the damn car, it’s a fifteen minute ride to the hospital.”

“We can’t go to the hospital!” Jude digs in her heels and looks to Cardan with wide eyes, suddenly coming to terms with the fact that they were in the mortal world. “Cardan, our baby has pointed ears and a tail!”

They’d been going to regular OBGYN appointments and seeing ultrasounds of the baby so they’d have an idea of what animal characteristic their child would present, glamouring the doctor after every visit. They knew that their little girl had a tail like her daddy. That would be a fucking problem if the hospital noticed.

“You focus on the hard part and leave the glamouring to me, darling,” he said with a kiss to her forehead.

Vivi had to threaten to knock her out and drag her into the backseat before she finally gave up and climbed in, grumbling the whole time.

“Cardan, start timing.” Vivi threw an old wristwatch over her shoulder and he caught it mid-air, marking the time and then staring at his wife as his sister-in-law did her very best to break the sound barrier with a beat-up SUV.

By the time they made it to the hospital, Jude was silent, save for her episodes of heavy breathing. A minute and a half apart now.

They pulled up to the women’s center and Cardan picked his wife up like she weighed no more than a feather. Vivi sped off, promising to go pick up Heather and return with food and a baby bag, since they were going to be in for the long haul.

Cardan made it to the maternity ward check in and was suddenly faced with the fact that he had literally no idea what to do here. Back in Elfhame, Jude would’ve had the baby in the comfort of their private rooms, with healers waiting on her hand and foot. The sterile smell and white walls of this mortal hospital made him infinitely more nervous than the comfort of their home would’ve.

“Hello sir,” the receptionist lady started, eyeing how he held his wife and how she didn’t seem at all panicked, and deciding that she has another father who had no clue what’s going on. Her tone was somewhere between soothing and mocking, like she’d dealt with this sort of thing all day. “If you’d like to fill out these forms—“

“My wife’s contractions are a minute and a half apart,” he cut her off, his fear somehow taking a backseat and his voice coming out with all the authority of a High King.

The receptionist’s eyes went wide. “I’m sorry, what?”

He maneuvered Jude so he could throw the watch down on the desk. Then he counted down from five and, right on time, Jude tensed with a contraction.

Then it was a flurry of movement, the receptionist throwing the papers to the side and calling for a wheelchair as Cardan stood dumbfounded. A nurse took Jude from his arms and settled her in a wheelchair before running through a set of double doors, leaving him to chase after her.

They ended up in what looked like a little sitting room with a table in the center. Then, as he watched, the nurse hit a few buttons in the wall and the whole room transformed. The two chairs pulled away from the table and the table unfolded into a bed, lowering down enough for Jude to climb up.

His wife was far past claiming that the baby wouldn’t be coming today. She’d gone somewhere within herself, both hands on her belly and focus written in every line on her face.

He helped the nurse undress her and tied her into a hospital gown while they strapped her into a bazillion different monitors. Soon, her heartbeat filled the room and he was watching all the screens, utterly terrified by his confusion.

“Can you give a urine sample?” A small nurse with a sickeningly fake grin asked, holding up a little plastic cup.

“Not with my baby’s head in the way,” Jude grunted in response, her teeth grinding down and one of her hands reaching for her husband’s. “Can you get the doctor?”

“I’m sure it’s not that bad, sweetie, let’s see how far along you are.” Cardan’s brow twitched at the offhanded way she spoke to his wife and he found himself gripping her hand harder to keep her from swinging for the nurse as the woman bent under the blanket, pulling Jude’s knees apart.

She was down there for a few seconds before popping back up, that smile even bigger as she said, “you’re at about nine centimeters. Don’t you worry at all, I’ll go get the doctor!”

Cardan, unaccustomed to speaking to many mortals, would’ve never thought twice about her words, if it weren’t for the way Jude snorted at the nurse all but sprinted out of the room.

“She’s lying,” Jude observed, sounding callous.

“My love?” He turned to her, new fear sprouting in his stomach.

“The nurse is lying about how dilated I am.” She nodded after where the woman had run out. “They have you start pushing at ten. She checked me and then said I was a nine and ran. That’s what they tell you when you’re at a ten and the doctor isn’t here.”

That comment leaves his mouth tasting like ash and she must see something amusing in the way his face changes, because she gives a little laugh.

For the next ten minutes or so, nobody came in except for one nurse who tried to force Jude again to give a urine sample, only getting blood and one pissed off couple for her efforts.

Jude turned onto her left side and Cardan sat on the bed by her hip, fingers carding through her hair and opposite hand rubbing her back to help her through a contraction.

They were like this when the door slammed open and a man, wearing a suit that most definitely wasn’t even close to sterile scrubs, ran in.

“I’ll be right back!” His hair was wild and his jacket half off as he held out both hands, almost like he was telling them both to wait. Just that quickly, he was gone again.

“What in the hell—“ Jude broke off with a groan and her heart rate spiked. Cardan may not know a lot, but he wasn’t that stupid, he knew this baby was coming soon.

A minute or so later, the door crashed open again and the doctor skidded into the room sideways, his scrubs pulled up to his elbows and a nurse tying on his cap as he finished adjusting one of his gloves.

“Let’s have a baby!”

Cardan watched in fascination as the man picked up what looked like a magic wand with a bulb on the end. He held it high above his head and pressed a button, causing the bulb to flash and all the lights to come out of the ceiling and angle towards the wand. The doctor then ordered the nurses to get Jude on her back and aimed the lights between her legs.

“Jude, did you see that?” Cardan asked, his jaw on the floor as he battled between awe at mortal technology and amusement at how his wife was now lit up like a stage. “The lights followed him!”

“I’m a little busy!” Jude hissed back and Cardan suddenly remembered that, oh yeah, his wife was literally in labor, and he should probably be paying attention to that instead of the lights.

“Shit, sorry!” He gripped her hand once more and kissed her forehead.

The whole room was alive with movement as the doctor got Jude in the right position and she began to push. One nurse was watching the monitors, keeping an eye on both mom and baby. Another was trying to force Jude to take some oral medication called Tylenol, because she had nothing to ease her pain, and Jude was batting her away. A third nurse held an oxygen mask to Jude’s face and kept one of her legs back.

Cardan held his wife’s hand and kept his other hand on her knee. He tuned into her, watching how a preternatural calm took over. The only thing giving away her pain was how she was nearly breaking his hand with every contraction.

He knew that a lot of woman were in labor for a long time, and that some pushed for hours, so this all seemed to be moving quite quickly. He kept his eyes on her face, on how focused she was on their baby. She still wasn’t crying, wasn’t screaming in pain. She just looked angry with every push, like she was using her fury to keep her cool in the situation.

Then something changed, just a little. She’d been pushing too hard, hadn’t stopped long enough to recover. For just one moment, Cardan saw fear flit across her face.

“I can’t breathe!” Cardan’s heart leapt as his wife cried out and he frantically ran through his options, trying to find something, anything to do to help her.

Then the nurse with the oxygen mask made a mistake.

“I just don’t think you’re trying very hard,” she snapped at Jude. It was the same woman who’d lied about how dilated Jude was.

Pure, unadulterated rage grew from the very pit of his stomach, but he didn’t get the chance to unleash it. Instead, he watched his wife’s eyes go murderous, her face go as blank as it did every time she held a knife to someone’s throat.

She stopped pushing and sat up, raising one finger to point at the nurse’s forehead like a witch laying a curse.

“GET THE FUCK OUT!”

It was the loudest he’d ever heard her scream, and her shout was a low bark instead of a shrill order. She was a general ordering a court marshall, the High Queen ordering an execution, not a woman going through the pain of childbirth.

The nurse fell back in shock, turning to him like she expected him to counteract his wife’s wishes.

“Get the fuck out!” He waved a hand to the door and made a face at the very idea that he’d even think of going against his wife’s word when she was busy birthing his daughter. How fucking dare this woman?

The nurse, now completely flabbergasted, turned to the doctor, who had only looked up when he heard the screaming. He took one look at Jude’s face and told the nurse to get the fuck out.

Jude grabbed the oxygen mask from the nurse as she left and held it to her own face, turning back to the ordeal of childbirth with twice the ferocity of before. It wasn’t a minute afterwards that the crying of their child filled the room.

Cardan threw himself full-force into glamouring away their daughter’s ears and her tail, a short little tail of fluffy black fur, sticking out like a sore thumb the way a kitten’s tail always does. The nurse and doctor didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary as they laid the little girl on Jude’s chest and asked Cardan to cut the cord.

She had a shock of midnight black hair just like her father and she certainly shared her mother’s temper as she angrily cried her little heart out, her face turning red.

Jude didn’t relax as they took her away to clean and measure her. She stayed focused on the rest of the birth, nodding her head to Cardan to tell him to keep an eye on their daughter.

It wasn’t until the little girl was weighed and cleaned and wrapped in a blanket that Jude keyed into the fact that it was over, their baby was here. She took the child in her arms again and wept, holding her as close as she could.

Cardan reaches a finger out, running it over the tiny pointed ear that only he and Jude could see. In response, the baby flexed her little hand and showed that she had the claws of a housecat.

His heart swelled with an emotion he couldn’t really describe as he took in the sight of his wife and daughter, his two girls.

The next two hours consisted of Vivi and Heather showing up, the Bomb in tow with a carriage to take them home since there was absolutely no way Jude was getting on a ragwort horse in her state. Vivi couldn’t believe that the baby was already there, just a half hour after she’d dropped Jude off. Cardan had to glamour their way out of the hospital after stealing the baby from the nursery, removing a little pink bow from her forehead that they’d affixed with toothpaste.

“Who the fuck puts toothpaste on a baby?” He raised an eyebrow at Jude from across the carriage, holding their daughter during the ride back so Jude could lay down.

It was a mess getting her out, especially so soon after birth. He’d had the Bomb ensure that healers were waiting in their chambers to help her in ways that the mortal doctors couldn’t, so he knew that it was best to move them both as soon as possible, but it still hurt him to see how drained she was.

“I can’t believe they put toothpaste on our baby,” he continued, looking down to where his daughter was watching him intently with big black eyes. He knew then and there, as he looked to her, that he was in trouble. He’d never recover from how much he loved this little girl.

“What in the world are we going to name her?” His whisper filled the carriage and Jude blinked back tears once again. Just seeing him with their little girl did things to her heart that she didn’t even know could be possible.

“Well,” she started, doing her best not to move too much, “why did your parents name you Cardan?”

“I don’t pretend to know why my parents did anything,” he snorted. “Why were you named Jude?”

She smiled up at the carriage ceiling. “I was named after a song that my mother enjoyed. Hey Jude. It was by a band called The Beatles.”

“You’ll have to show me the song sometime.”

She laid her hands on her belly, which still looked pregnant, and studied how her husband’s long fingers curved over their bundled up daughter.

“How about Lucille?”

He made a questioning noise, obviously having gotten lost in their baby’s eyes.

“Lucille,” she tried again. “The band who wrote the song I’m named for had another song, Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds. We could name her Lucille and only ever call her Lucy. It would make it all the harder to guess her truename.”

“Do you ever stop scheming, my darling nemesis?” He smiled as he turned the name over in his head. He liked the idea of naming their little girl after a song, especially a mortal one. He wanted her to be proud of her roots.

“Not when it comes to protecting my family,” she promised, her voice suddenly grave.

Cardan just smiled again and looked up at his wife, at his whole world.

“Lucille Greenbriar,” he tried the name out. “Little Lucy.”

Jude’s face softened once more and she reached out to take the baby, tucking the child close to her chest as they sailed over Elfhame.

“I like it,” he announced.

~~~~~~~~~~~

For those of you keeping track at home, here’s a list of things that:

My mother actually did during labor/my birth that Jude Duarte 100% would’ve done:

•Refused to believe I would be born on my due date. Was so adamant that she called every family member and told them to leave her the fuck alone/stop fucking asking about the baby/there was no way the baby would be born on her due date so shut up

•Confused her water breaking for peeing on herself

•Had to be threatened with physical violence before she’d go to the hospital

•Had to remind a nurse that she couldn’t actually pee with a bABY’S HEAD IN THE WAY DIPSHIT

•Called a nurse out for lying

•Pointed at the nurse who told her she “wasn’t trying that hard” and screamed to GET THE FUCK OUT

•Took no medication because she was a fucking boss, held her on oxygen mask after she fired the nurse. Didn’t cry or yell, just got angry

•Had her baby 30 minutes after showing up to the hospital. On the baby’s due date

My father literally did during my mom’s labor/my birth that Cardan Greenbriar 100% would have done:

•Stood by and let his wife call all the family yelling, even though it was two weeks from Christmas and he knew they’d have no way to get in contact if the baby came (everyone was 15 hours away and it was pre cellphone)

•Started timing his wife’s contractions and then dragged her into the car when they were 2 minutes apart after a huge fight

•Slam dunked on the receptionist when they checked in

•Was in awe of the hospital technology

•Literlly, I’m not kidding, when the doc did the whole “lights pointing at the wand” thing and aimed all the room lights at his wife’s crotch he actually yelled “Honey look! You’re a star!”

•Backed his wife tHE FUCK UP when she fired a nurse (the doctor also literally told the nurse to get tf out that really happened. He also really 100% did slide into the room with scrubs half on)

•Asked a nurse why the fuck she put toothpaste on his baby

•Named his baby after a song

My parents’ best friends did that Vivienne would’ve done:

•Brought the baby bag because the dipshits forgot it

•Went “what the fuck do you mean the baby is already here it’s been half an hour”

•(not in the story but) Offer the pregnant lady fried chicken and then never make it iT’S BEEN 21 YEARS SIR WHERE IS HER CHICKEN

•Help no-longer-pregnant lady sneak out cuz she didn’t wanna be there anymore

~~~~~~~~~

Tag list: @cardan-greenbriar-tcp @hizqueen4life @slightlyrebelliouswriter23 @thewickedkings @aelin-queen-of-terrasen @cheekycheekycheeks lol just tell me if you wanna be added

[brightbeautifulthings]

The Queen of Nothing by Holly Black

"'Tell me what I must slay, what I must steal, tell me the riddle I must solve or the hag I must trick. Only tell me the way, and I will do it, no matter the danger, no matter the hardship, no matter the cost.'"

Year Read: 2021

Rating: 4/5

About: There are spoilers ahead for The Cruel Prince and The Wicked King. Jude is living in exile in the human world, despite her unrecognized status as the queen of Elfhame. When Taryn arrives unexpectedly seeking Jude's help, she agrees to return to the faerie court in her twin sister's place. Yet Elfhame is more dangerous than ever as varying factions search for a weakness in Cardan's rule. Madoc threatens war, and Jude is, as ever, on her own side. When a curse breaks out and terrorizes the kingdom, Elfhame's exiled queen may be the only one who can stop it--at terrible cost. Trigger warnings: some body horror, severe injury, abduction, violence, poison. Some NSFW content.

Thoughts: Another lovely buddy read with @cementeriodelibrosolvidads​! Much as I enjoyed this series, it doesn't match the magic of The Darkest Part of the Forest, which remains my uncontested Holly Black favorite. In part, I think it's a pacing issue. I enjoyed reading all of them, but it's not always clear why this is a trilogy in terms of the plot and its scope. This is the quickest moving of all three books, and it does the best job of pulling all the unexpected detours into a purposeful twist. I rarely know where Black is going to take things, which makes for a twisty, enjoyable read (although I think her riddles are a bit obvious this time around). This was easily my favorite book in the trilogy, and I didn’t want to put it down.

I'm a little surprised that Jude and Cardan are an unsinkable ship on Tumblr, given how little page time they actually spend together across the series. Much as I enjoyed Cardan's redemption arc and seeing the two of them (finally) on the same team, their development as a couple fell shorter than I was expecting--not because it isn't there but because, quite realistically, they still hardly know each other by the end of the novel. Black's faerie novels almost always end with overthrowing an evil ruler and putting a more just one in its place, but for the first time, that felt far more like a beginning than an ending. I wouldn't be surprised if she continued this story at some point. I suspect we could get an entirely new trilogy about Jude and Cardan's rule.

[faerytalesfromtheabyss]

It’s time for my craziest Queen of Nothing theory yet

So, I think Cardan’s going to transform into a giant snake. Literally. I know you think I’ve officially lost it, but hear me out.

We don’t know the full prophesy depicted in Cardan’s star chart, but whenever he says anything about the prophesy he always mentions one specific word: “monster.”

In the deleted scenes of TWK, Cardan thinks about his star chart: “Lord Baphen said he was going to be the ruination of the throne and a monster” (TWK 333).

Also, in “The Lament of Lutie-Loo” the short story at the end of the new bind-up edition of The Modern Faerie Tale Series, Cardan specifically mentions that he’s “prophesied to be a monster” (777).

It could be argued that Cardan is already a monster due to his cruelty or that he could become a tyrant and become a figurative monster. But The Queen of Nothing cover and the poster at Book Con with the giant snake made me think… What if becoming a monster is literal? 

So, what if Cardan turned into a giant snake? More accurately, what if he turned into a a wyrm or lindworm? (dragonlike creatures that are depicted similarly to a snake)

Faeries transforming into monsters due to extremely strong emotions are cannon in the Holly Black Fae-verse. In The Darkest Part of the Forest, one of the faeries transforms into a monster after her mortal husband is murdered: “Her grief transformed her. She became a monster, a nightmare creature of grief and sorrow” (TDPoTF 206).

Also, magical transformations are a common trope in fairytales and faery folk lore. A few stories that come to mind are: the ballad of “Tamlin” (which Holly Black’s book Tithe was inspired from), “The Prince Lindworm” and of course, “Beauty and the Beast.”

If there is a curse on Cardan, I think there’s a certain human who can break it. Here’s a quote from the Barns and Nobel description of The Queen of Nothing: “When a dark curse is unveiled, Jude must become the first mortal Queen of Faerie and uncover how to break the curse, or risk upsetting the balance of the whole Faerie world.”

Assuming that Cardan turns into a snakelike creature (I’m going to guess a lindworm), it could be an interesting adaption of the “Prince Lindworm” story. It’s one of my favorite fairy tales so I’ll just leave a link to the story here. The element that I think would be adapted from the fairy tale in TQoN is how the curse is broken. (If anyone wants to write fanfiction of this, I will sing your praises until the end of time.)

Anyways, I don’t think this theory is likely. Elfhame freezing over, Cardan transforming into lindworm and back, and the possible outbreak of war would be a lot to fit into a book that’s 300-400 pgs. 

But @fangirlinghard-spoilerson and everyone else, let me know what you think! What do you think the curse is? And what does the snake on the book cover mean?

[fallafl]

Book Review: The Queen of Nothing (The Folk of The Air #3)

“Maybe it isn’t the worst thing to want to be loved. Even if it hurts. Maybe being human isn’t always being weak. Maybe it was the shame that was the problem.” - Jude Duarte

Author: Holly Black

Genre: Young Adult Fantasy, Romance

Publisher: Little Brown Books

Year: 2019

My Rating: 4 / 5

Synopsis on Goodreads:

 He will be destruction of the crown and the ruination of the throne. Power is much easier to acquire than it is to hold onto. Jude learned this lesson when she released her control over the wicked king, Cardan, in exchange for immeasurable power. Now as the exiled mortal Queen of Faerie, Jude is powerless and left reeling from Cardan’s betrayal. She bides her time determined to reclaim everything he took from her. Opportunity arrives in the form of her deceptive twin sister, Taryn, whose mortal life is in peril. Jude must risk venturing back into the treacherous Faerie Court, and confront her lingering feelings for Cardan, if she wishes to save her sister. But Elfhame is not as she left it. War is brewing. As Jude slips deep within enemy lines she becomes ensnared in the conflict’s bloody politics. And, when a dormant yet powerful curse is unleashed, panic spreads throughout the land, forcing her to choose between her ambition and her humanity… From the #1 New York Times bestselling author Holly Black, comes the highly anticipated and jaw-dropping finale to The Folk of the Air trilogy.

Oh dear, it was such a roller coaster:

I’m hitting play Lana Del Rey - Queen of Disaster because ‘got me spinnin’ like a ballerina. Feeling gangster everytime I see ya. You’re the king and baby, I’m the Queen of disaster, disaster~’ sounds like something Jude would sing to Cardan LOL

The final book not only captures Jude’s endeavor to return to Elfhame and rule as the true Queen of Elfhame alongside Cardan, but also their relationship. Honestly, the romance captivates me the most because it’s a whole level of love-hate relationship. It’s definitely the epitome of tainted love which makes me crave for their interaction so much. And every time I read their dialogue, I felt like screaming inside. Hats off to the author for her impeccable writing. I love how their feelings develop towards each other throughout the trilogy. You just can’t get enough of Jude Duarte and Cardan Greenbriar because 1) their personalities complement each other, 2) they have great arcs together, 3) we got so little of their conversation throughout the preceding books. I’m glad I got to see more of it in this one.

And to be fair, I want to share the spotlight to The Roach’s and The Bomb’s relationship because they are so adorable and I love them so much. Theirs are so simple and meaningful. It was like breathing a fresh air, taking a break from the intense one that Jude and Cardan have.

Despite getting the relationship development I was waiting for, I feel like I was going back to the beginning because we’re still on the never-ending game of throne. Madoc’s greed brings us to his unfinished business of stealing the crown. Initially, I was anticipating something more intriguing, given that Cardan has stopped being the puppet king and had the liberty to do whatever he want. I did mention in my previous review on The Wicked King that I am satisfied with the character developments, especially when Cardan broke free from Jude’s control and showed his true power by the magic he did. I was looking forward to reading further use of it because it must’ve a boon amidst the tension. I hoped it’s not a waste of such powerful gift.

However, like I said earlier, reading the book had been a roller coaster for me. I really don’t want to spoil anything, but I could go from marking lines with question marks, to sighing, to shaking my head, and to hyperventilating because of certain unexpected, jaw-dropping events throughout reading. Please anticipate more and more magic.

Overall, Queen of Nothing (or should I wrap up as The Folk of The Air trilogy) is nothing like your common fairy tale. It plunges us into something that was rather dark. Eventually leaves you wondering if the story is heading to a happily every after at all. Regardless, I found myself so immersed in the story and liked it more than I thought I would.

[buecherbummlerin]

The Queen of Nothing (The Folk of Air III)

Author:

- Holly Black

Publisher:

- Hot Key Books

Content (Blurb):

As the exiled mortal Queen of Faerie, Jude is reeling from Cardan’s betrayal and is determined to reclaim everything he took from her. Opportunity arrives in the form of her deceptive twin sister, Taryn, whose life is in peril. Jude must return to the treacherous Faerie Court and confront her lingering feelings for Cardan.

But Elfhame is not as she left it. War is brewing, and she becomes ensnared in the conflict’s bloody politics. When a terrible curse is unleashed, panic spreads throughout the land, forcing Jude to choose between her ambition and her humanity…

My Review:

Thank you Holly Black for this beautiful ending of the book series. The book starts with Jude living in exile and trying to accept her fate and Cardan’s betrayal. Holly Black did a great job in describing Jude’s feelings and all the battles she had to fight within her and outside in the real world. Especially Jude and her inner battles, the role of humanity and her life within Faerie, and her feelings for Cardan are in the centre of this book and give the reader a detailed and very interesting as well as thrilling look into Jude’s world, her mind and heart. Especially the role of the different relationships and the battles between people who love each other and try to work things out are another important part of the book and I really enjoyed this.

“Come home and shout at me. Come home and fight with me. Come home and break my heart, if you must.” (Holly Black, Queen of Nothing)

 Also I loved the huge amount of detail when it comes to all the theories and sagas issuing Faerie and especially Cardan and the Faerie Crown. Holly Black really surprised me with all the detail and how it all came together at the end. There are a lot of interesting twists within the story due to the detailed theorycrafting which combines all three books in a perfect and very thrilling way.

 “Tell me what I must slay, what I must steal, tell me the riddle I must solve or the hag I must trick. Only tell me the way, and I will do it, no matter the danger, no matter the hardship, no matter the cost.” (Holly Black, Queen of Nothing)

All in all Holly Black created a dangerous, devious and simultaneously beautiful Faerie world. The role of hope, dreams, love and complex relationships are wonderfully embedded within the treacherous Faery world and its unique magic.

Resume:

Definitely a great closing of the book series. The Queen of Nothing will give you some good twists and turns as well as deep emotional battles and complex relationships. If you already started with the books series The Queen of Nothing is a must read!

[fangirlinghard-spoilerson]

How Grima Mog is connected to Jude’s and Cardan’s marriage, A Theory

Elfhame's freeze, crossed destinies, curses, purple snakes and marital quarrels aside, we have to talk about a few more possible things happening in The Queen of Nothing.

For example...

High Court of Faerie is composed by Seelie and Unseelie Courts and the Wild Folk. So marrying Jude isn’t a bad political move just because of Balekin's death. The Seelie Minister and Unseelie Minister fight for power within Living Council, through High King’s preferences, actions... identification.

TWK, Chap 7

“Today courtiers told me that girl wore an anklet of swinging rubies sent to her in apology, but was unable to stand on her own,” says Nihuar, the Seelie representative. She purses her small green lips. “I find everything about that to be in poor taste.”

[...]

“You’d prefer he[Cardan]’d killed her outright?” I say. My skills in diplomacy are nowhere near as honed as my skills in aggravation. Besides, I’m tired.

“I wouldn’t mind,” says the Unseelie representative, Mikkel, with a chuckle. “Our new High King seems Unseelie through and through, and he [Cardan] will favor us, I think. We could give him a debauch better than the one his Master of Revels brags over, now that we know what he likes.”

A High King MARRIED TO A HUMAN causes the power to stand dangerously to one side and Elfhame lose its balance.

Now you must be wondering "which side?" or perhaps thinking "All fairies would hate to have a mortal as queen"

Yes. But some faeries would hate more.

I'll explain my distinction between (1) fairies Seelie and faries Unseelie, (2) the way they treat humans, and (3) the hypothetical reactions to having Jude as a queen using two characters.

VALERIAN.

Unseelie.

Humans are like insects, made to be crushed.

“How dare she? She's no Faerie Queen, she's clay. And I will show her where she belongs.”

LOCKE.

Seelie.

Humans are like toys, and once in a while they break.

“Now that we have a new toy new games will be played.”

I'm not saying the Seelie fairies would like or approve Jude as queen. I'm saying the Unseelie fairies would hate it so much more...

(Maybe I'm wrong. This distinction is fishy to me. Help me, please.)

But how can this problem of balance be solved?

Two words:

Grima Mog.

A General exchange is suggested long before Taryn deceive Cardan.

TWK, Chap. 15

Randalin [Minister of Keys] catches my sleeve. “Jude,” he says. “Allow me to give you a word of advice.” I wonder if I am about to be scolded. “The seneschal isn’t just the voice of the king,” he says. “You’re his hands as well. If you don’t like working with General Madoc, find a new Grand General, one who hasn’t previously committed treason.”

Now that Elfhame does not have a general - or maybe, between books, Elfhame had get a general who is not fit to the job - it is necessary to find someone who can handle it.

TWK, Chap 7

“And the general of the Court of Teeth, Grima Mog, seems to have left her post. No one is sure what she intends. We can ill afford carelessness on the part of the High King.”

I’ve heard of Grima Mog. She is terrifying, but not as terrifying as Orlagh.

Grima Mog used to be the general of the Court of Teeth, a very traditionally Unseelie Court.

We don’t know Grima Mog story, she could have left the Court of Teeth because the Court isn’t Unseelie enough to her. Or because it is too much Unseelie. Maybe she just don’t want work anymore. Maybe her ambitions are greater. But none of this matters because Grima Mog was an Unseelie Court general and she is known for it.

If Elfhame receives, at the same time, an Unseelie General and a human Queen, power and influence may be balanced between Seelie Minister and Unseelie Minister in the Court. Or, at least, it could look like it is.

@faerytalesfromtheabyss​, what do you think?

[caitsbooks]

THE QUEEN OF NOTHING (THE FOLK OF THE AIR #3) BY HOLLY BLACK – DID IT SURVIVE THE HYPE? (REVIEW)

This Review Will Contain Spoilers for The Cruel Prince and The Wicked King, but there will be NO SPOILERS for The Queen of Nothing. I’m not cruel.

Overall: 5/5 Stars Characters: 5/5 Setting: 5/5 Writing: 5/5 Plot and Themes: 5/5 Awesomeness Factor: 5/5 Review in a Nutshell: Listen, I’m trash for this series. The Queen of Nothing had a lot to live up to, but it did. It reminded me why this series is so hyped, it proved it deserves every bit of it.

“Let me be feared and never again afraid.”

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// Content Warning: Violence, Death, Assault, Child Abuse/Neglect, War Themes, Murder //

Release Date: 11/19/2019 Publisher: Little, Brown Books for Young Readers Page Count: 309 Premise:

The Wicked King left off with the worst possible cliffhanger ending, with a plot twist I never saw coming. The Queen of Nothing takes place not too long after that ending- Jude has created a life for herself in the mortal world after being exiled, doing odd jobs for other Folk and living with Vivi and Oak. When her sister Taryn returns from Elfhame with shocking news, Jude must delve back into the world of courtly politics and war to help her, even if it means facing the man who betrayed her, the High King Cardan Greenbriar.

“Two paths are before me, but only one leads to victory.”

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Read more for all of my thoughts on the conclusion to The Folk of the Air series, or, check out the full review over on my blog!!

[ Related: The Wicked King by Holly Black (ARC Review) ]

Follow Me Here: Blog || Goodreads || Bookstagram || Twitter  || Reviews

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“We have lived in our armor for so long, you and I. And now I am not sure if either of us knows how to remove it.”

WRITING & SETTING

Holly Black’s writing style is just amazing. Her writing perfectly balancing poignancy and thought-provoking topics with fun quips and just amazingly relatable moments. Jude is of both the mortal world and the magical world- being a mortal raised in Elfhame- and you can get that feeling just through Holly Black’s writing. It feels both otherworldly and magical while being full of purely human aspects.

Meanwhile, the setting really makes this series stand out. Holly Black truly is the queen of the Fae. She has crafted a beautifully intricate world parallel to ours, with such great depth and detail, and grounded in fascinating mythology and history. While The Queen of Nothing doesn’t expand on the world and magic quite as much as previous books have, it really does place a spotlight on it.

“Magic is seldom so convenient as to conform to our preferences.”

PLOT

I won’t lie- some of this book feels a little rushed. That’s honestly a complaint I have with the series as a whole. Each book could be much longer than they are. The Queen of Nothing comes in at just barely over 300 pages, and it has a lot to wrap up. That said, it does succeed. While I did wish we could have a little more time to sit with some moments, the fast pace did make this book very bingeable and absolutely impossible to put down.

This book also has a few twists thrown in, but they definitely weren’t quite as surprising as the twists in previous books. There was maybe one that really took me by surprise, but the rest were fairly predictable if you are highly invested with this series and as obsessed as I am. That said, this book is still a great conclusion. It ties up loose ends really well, but it definitely wasn’t as… surprising as I expected. I don’t know how else to say it without spoilers. It just didn’t end in a way I thought the series would end.

“If you’re looking for reasons why he disappointed you, by all accounts, Prince Cardan was a disappointment from the beginning.”

mood.

CHARACTERS

The characters are where The Folk of the Air series really does shine. Every aspect of this series is fantastic, don’t get me wrong, but it’s the characters that add the heart and brutality to the series. Jude is such a strong and interesting protagonist. This book puts her through a lot, and we see sides of her that were hinted at in previous books fully explored. I reread the first two books in preparation for this one and damn, her growth is astonishing. Also, Cardan. I love Cardan so much. He’s a drunk idiot sometimes, but other times, he is just plain incredible. We definitely see that incredible side of him a lot in this book. It’s truly amazing for a character to be so understood by the reader while also still being able to surprise them.

However, I don’t want to go too much into Cardan right now because, well, spoilers. Let’s talk about some of our other characters- Vivi and Heather are my loves and I would love an entire book just about them. Taryn didn’t really leave that much of an impression on me in this book beyond the first fifty pages, but she definitely made a mark in those pages. And finally, Madoc. Madoc is such a captivating character- I always think I have him pinned down but then he does something to completely change my perspective of him. This book continues to reveal sides of him I both expected yet didn’t and I absolutely loved it.

“I know how to drive a knife through my own hand. I know how to hate and be hated. And I know how to win the day, provided I am willing to sacrifice everything good in me for it.”

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[ Related: The Cruel Prince by Holly Black (ARC Review) ]

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CONCLUSION

Pros- Great characters, solid conclusion, I love this world Cons- A little rushed. I’m also just bitter that this series is over. What am I supposed to obsess over now??? Overall- 5/5 stars. This book series will forever have a hold on my heart, and The Queen of Nothing reminded me of every reason why. This book is a fantastic conclusion to a series I’ll love for the rest of my life.

“Let me have everything I ever wanted, everything I ever dreamed, and eternal misery along with it. Let me live on with an ice shard through my” heart.

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IF YOU LIKED THE QUEEN OF NOTHING, I’D RECOMMEND:

An Enchantment of Ravens by Margaret Rogerson – (Review)

Wicked Saints (Something Dark and Holy #1) by Emily A. Duncan – (Review)

The Caged Queen (Iskari #2) by Kristen Ciccarelli – (Review + Giveaway)

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Have you read The Queen of Nothing yet? What did you think?

Also, what are your thoughts on the cover? After reading, I get all the symbolism, but I’m still not really a fan of it (especially the Barnes and Noble edition- oh god please don’t make me look at it).

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Add To Your Goodreads Shelf Purchase From: Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Indiebound

Looking for more reviews & other bookish nonsense? Follow Me Here: Blog || Goodreads || Bookstagram || Twitter  || Reviews

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BONUS! MORE QUOTES THAT I LOVE

“‘Mortals are fragile,’ I say. ‘Not you,’ he says in a way that sounds a little like a lament. ‘You never break.’”

“By you, I am forever undone.”

“It really is a magical word: no. You say whatever bullshit you want and I just say no.”

“I think of his riddle. How do people like us take off our armor? One piece at a time.”

“My sweet nemesis, how glad I am that you returned.”

“That boy is your weakness.”

“All power is cursed. The most terrible among us will do anything to get it, and those who’d wield power best don’t want it thrust upon them. But that doesn’t mean they can avoid their responsibilities forever.”

“There is no banquet too abundant for a starving man.”

“Imagine if, in the mortal world, a lawyer passed the bar by killing another lawyer.”

“‘I tried to kill you,’ she reminds me. ‘You’ve described pretty much every important relationship in my life.’”

[bijoulilou]

After TWK part ii

Jude was looking at some sketches when Tom saw her. She was so beautiful, he had noticed her before when she picked up Oak but never did anything about it. His hands felt sweaty and he had to wipe his palms on his jeans as he walked towards her. Somebody bumped into him, knocking his glasses down. A short woman with umber skin and too young to have white hair excused herself as he tried to feel for them. The lack of light and moving feet made it difficult for him to make out their shape. A hand reaches out to help him and returns his glasses. A boy.

No a young man, not much older than Tom with a haughtiness that made it obvious he was not familiar with the word no. He wore such a long and dark shirt that he would have stood out during the day especially with the humidity. But under the guise of low light and darkness he blended quite well. His sharp cheekbones and burning amber eyes greeted Tom as he thanked him for returning his glasses.

Cardan smiled, " You shouldn't go around giving so much gratitude you might end up in someone's debt one day. Besides they were right in front of me, easy to find."

"Well, thank you. Last time I'll say it." Tom frowned at the small damage, "Oh no. There's a big scratch. I knew I should've worn contacts. Now how will I find her." He mutters the last bit of his gripe but of course the King of Elfhame hear's this.

"Yes. What a shame they didn't break. Are you looking for someone, a date perhaps?" Cardan didn't even try to hide his eagerness but Tom was too distracted to notice. Tom nods and tries clean his glasses to the best of his abilities.

"Well sort of, do you think you can help me out. She was just over by that wall over there, I didn't see her brother or her sister with her."

Cardan follows his gaze, "Well what does she look like? Fair skinned? Blonde? Oooo I think that's her over there!" He points in the opposite direction at a random mortal but Tom just shakes his head and starts to press on looking for her. Town square wasn't that big but there were plenty of people and conflicting rhythms to get lost in it all. A couple of teens with neon glow paint ran in between them laughing with glee. "I doubt we'll find her now."

Tom frowns," I wonder if I still have that call sheet from all the parents in homeroom. Pretty sure I uploaded it to my-"SMACK. Cardan slaps the phone out of Tom's hand and it falls facedown on the pavement. Tom looks down at it in horror. "Why did you do that?!"

"Do what? Stand here as your phone flew out of your hands? I just met you sir and I have trouble with where your tone is going." Cardan steers him out of the crowd and under a lamplight handing him a handkerchief with strange embellishments. Tom begins to profusely wipe away at the screen hoping it'll turn on. Cardan taps at the phone and seems to power off. "No good I see. Well you might as well get a drink to wash away this turnout. How about some wine. Oh look, wine!" He points at a sangria vendor. But Tom won't have any of it.

"Dude, what is your problem! I'm trying to find my date, whose not really my date, and you're bad juju is messing up my vibes!" Tom pushes his glasses up onto his forehead in frustration, cursing today's events.

Cardan glares at him with narrow eyes, noticing how much taller this human is. Not only that but stockier too. He reaches out to feel Tom's bicep and gasps at how impressive it is. This bumbily fool who seemed weak willed with muscles would be perfect for Jude.

" No thank you, I don't drink alcohol."

Cardan's jaw dropped at his enemy incarnate. This man was Jude's dream come true. Before he could utter a glamour to sabotage him further, The Bomb pushed him out of the way. Bringing Tom's face to her own. She whispered in a heavily enchanted voice that he would not speak nor remember his encounter with the King tonight nor would he tell anyone about it. She hesitated before she added that from now on he would not need glasses anymore and to keep a close watch on Jude and her siblings. Bringing her any news of changes or strange occurrences. Cardan opened his mouth to add something when he was rushed away.

They watched from afar as their beloved mortal found Oak's teacher and waited to see things unravel. When they returned to faerie, furniture was thrown and goblets of wine were filled. And the king refused any visitors as he retreated into his former seneschal's living quarters. The Bomb was allowed to bring refreshments of wine but the King did not want to see anybody else.

Cardan tossed and turned as he dreamt of that stupid mortal being lead away by Jude. The same Jude who wouldn't smile at Cardan's clever jokes or wear that pretty sunflower dress for him that he sent for her. The flowly fabrics with dips that accentuated curves he's felt before. He sighed into the duvet breathing in her perfume. He scoffed at how disgusting he had become, like some love scorned faun.

How had she not figured it out? The mortal ward of Madoc the Redcap, the famously clever twin who outsmarted and outstrategized as she lived and breathed. Why was she still on the other side?

He looked at the ceiling and faced answer he didn't want to admit.

Maybe she didn't figure it out because she didn't want to come back. What if she didn't want his forgiveness and wanted to stay exiled.

Or even more frightening, what if she had and decided that she didn't care anymore. That he wasn't worthy of revenge?

Cardan's chest hurt at the thought and he wondered if the pain was from anything else unrelated. He knew it was not.

The Bomb came to the door, no goblet in hand but raised eyebrows at her King's state. She turned around and gestured for Van, the Roach to go in instead. Van groaned but went in anyway. He went in to find the once proud prince now slumbering King wrapped around one of Jude's old doublets. He knocked on the door several times to wake Cardan, but nothing not even a stir. Instead he made some tea and set it aside for his majesty. When he right and ready he would call for them.

They made their way back to the court of shadows, ushering away their new recruits pouring themselves heavy liquor to salve this wound of a day. The Bomb drank from a heavy coffee mug that said 'Shut up' on its face and then 'proceed' at the bottom.

"Liliver," Van starts," do you miss the ol' days? You know when we used to be thieves and deviants for a living? You gotta admit that was fun." His turn to drink his cup clean of smokey sweet beverage. It burns his throat in a soothing way.

"Well, not really. This is much more fun isn't it? Plus we get paid." She pours herself another.

" I guess you're right. But this steady salary is making us soft I think. What we need is some good excitement around here. I miss Jude."

Liliver nods in agreement then tilts her lips devilishly."You know, Van, you should be careful what you wish for."

Before he can ask why, one if their messengers comes into the room. They're to be summoned to the palace. It is there when news comes of their updated itinerary.

Van scolds at the terrible mortal's neck, uttering curses under his breath as he watches the young man knock on the door. He mutters more when he sees his old friend in a pretty sundress greet said young man at the door.

"Babysitting." He groans.

[bookishreviewsblog]

Holly Black: The Queen of Nothing (The Folk of the Air #3) | Lara

He will be destruction of the crown and the ruination of the throne.

Power is much easier to acquire than it is to hold onto. Jude learned this lesson when she released her control over the wicked king, Cardan, in exchange for immeasurable power.

Now as the exiled mortal Queen of Faerie, Jude is powerless and left reeling from Cardan’s betrayal. She bides her time determined to reclaim everything he took from her. Opportunity arrives in the form of her deceptive twin sister, Taryn, whose mortal life is in peril.

Jude must risk venturing back into the treacherous Faerie Court, and confront her lingering feelings for Cardan, if she wishes to save her sister. But Elfhame is not as she left it. War is brewing. As Jude slips deep within enemy lines she becomes ensnared in the conflict’s bloody politics.

And, when a dormant yet powerful curse is unleashed, panic spreads throughout the land, forcing her to choose between her ambition and her humanity…

From the #1 New York Times bestselling author Holly Black, comes the highly anticipated and jaw-dropping finale to The Folk of the Air trilogy.

Reading and reviewing one’s most anticipated release of the year is the most stressful and yet the most wonderful feeling in the world. After finding out the release date was pushed forward, I couldn’t believe the end of this amazing trilogy was coming to an end, and yet the waiting seemed like forever. So how do I subdue my expectations, collect my thoughts and put aside the love bursting from my chest for these series to give this book an honest review it deserves? Well, I still don’t know, but the more people expect from a certain book, the more likely they are to be disappointed – especially me, huh. But that’s all part of that reading experience and I guess I’ll learn to accept that imperfect ending doesn’t mean my favorite book is ruined.

“I am the Queen of Elfhame. Even though I am the queen in exile, I am still the queen. And that means Madoc isn’t just trying to take Cardan’s throne. He’s trying to take mine.”

After Jude’s exile and Cardan’s betrayal, there is not much for her to do in the mortal world. Her pride wounded, her trust in her king broken, left with nothing but her sister’s apartment and the acid taste of defeat in her mouth, Jude lets herself be preoccupied with mundane tasks in the mortal world. Until, one day, she finds her sister Taryn – who betrayed her and Cardan to Madoc – at her door, asking for help. She didn’t quite think about the consequences when she killed her husband Locke, and as it turns out, the only one with the power to lie to the High King is her sister. So Jude decides to take her only chance of returning to Elfhame and joining, once again, the fight for the throne.

“All power is cursed,” I say. “The most terrible among us will do anything to get it, and those who’d wield power best don’t want it thrust upon them. But that doesn’t mean they can avoid their responsibilities forever.”

Words of this universe cannot even begin to describe how much these series mean to me – for the last year and a half, I’ve been in constant touch with these characters, schemes, plots and the world of faerie Kings and Queens. Jude and Cardan have won my heart and I don’t even want it back – Elfhame is a new home now and I’m never going to leave it. Black’s incredible writing and intricate storytelling captured every ounce of my attention, not letting go of it until the very end. I am still overwhelmed with emotion – from the joy of having such a beautiful book in my life to tears because, at last, it is over. These books have permanently engraved themselves into my mind and I think it is going to be a very long time before I can stop thinking about them.

I loved every single character from this book – from the most unlikeable ones to my favorites Jude and Cardan - they are all so amazingly developed, their dynamics and interactions carefully conceived in a ruthless war for power. The additions to the story like Grima Mog or the rulers from the Court of Teeth brought some fresh energy and the intense note of a war, yet the old characters such as Bomb and Ghost are the ones that reminded me precisely how much I loved that world of trickery and betrayal. I could read solely their interactions and dialogues for the rest of my life without getting bored.

“I think of his riddle. How do people like us take off our armor?

One piece at a time.”

Jude is still one of my favorite characters of all times – that ruthless queen warrior will not be perfect, but the change I was most astonished by was the one within Cardan’s character. He became a ruler he was always meant to be, only fairer and juster, with a mortal queen at his side. He shed all his armors and became only stronger for it, defying all those who wanted to see him fail. Their relationship is an enemies-to-lovers trope in a form you’ve never seen before – a game of trust and lies with no actual winner.

*spoiler for ending*

“Come home and shout at me. Come home and fight with me. Come home and break my heart, if you must.”

God bless my Judecardan ending I love them so much. I loved reading about their dynamics during this trilogy, but this ending was fitting and a huge relief to my fragile heart.

“I missed you," I whisper against his skin and feel dizzy with the intimacy of the admission, feel more naked than when he could see every inch of me. "In the mortal world, when I thought you were my enemy, I still missed you."

"My sweet nemesis, how glad I am that you returned.”

So, what went wrong and why isn’t this book 5 stars if I love everything so much. Well, for the most part, it is because The Queen of Nothing was too short. The whole time while I was reading it, and especially towards the end, I felt like things were a bit too rushed. There wasn’t much scheming and power-moves that made me love the first two books so hard, and even my unconditional love for Black’s writing and these characters couldn’t make up for lacking a solid ending. *spoiler for ending* The ending itself was good and quite satisfying, but it would have felt so much more intense if there was a final battle between Madoc’s army and the crown, or even a fight scene between a father and daughter.

I can’t believe this magical journey of The Folk of the Air is already over – my heart is in pieces after realizing I will never get to read any of these books for the first time again. I’m going to be off now to watch judecardan fanart.