#how many races has it taken for people to finally notice
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petit-papillion · 7 months ago
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eddiethebrave · 3 months ago
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secret admirer part six
602 words
one two three four five
Steve is a horrible artist. “I suck.” He slumps in his seat. 
Carol places her paintbrush into the cup of water between them and leans over to see his paper. “...Nooo this is good,” she says, but Steve can clearly see the way her mouth twists as if she’s holding in a laugh. It’s a great show of restraint for her. He’s actually kinda impressed.
Steve pushes her away gently and turns his easel so she can’t see anymore. She cackles. 
Steve huffs and studies his painting. It was supposed to be a dog but looks more like a frankly unsettling misshapen creature. He shivers and paints over the things creepy ass eyes that were previously staring into his soul.  
“Aw. I liked it better before.” 
Steve jumps, dropping his brush - that was loaded with black paint - into his lap. He’s never been happier that their art teacher makes them wear aprons - these are his favorite jeans. He puts the brush in the water cup. 
The voice snickers and Steve finally turns, heart racing. He already knows who it is before he meets the big brown eyes. Eddie has sat to his left since the beginning of this semester (which is also when Steve began to develop this little obsession but who’s counting). 
He didn’t take into account that turning his painting away from Carol would put it right into Eddie’s line of sight. 
Steve raises a brow. “You’re joking, right?”
Eddie grins and drops his chair back to the ground as opposed to balancing on the back two legs. He turns his easel enough that Steve can see his painting. It’s just as, if not more, disturbing than his little dog creature thing. Steve’s not quite sure what it is, but it looks slimy.
“Dude, gross,” Steve says, but he’s smiling. 
That night, Tommy gets into an argument with Carol and calls Steve to complain about it. She wanted to know why all he ever wants to do is hook up and honestly, Steve was kinda wondering the same thing. 
All Tommy wants to talk about these days is them hooking up or asking Steve if he’s hooking up with anyone (don’t be a prude, man, tell me what happened) no matter how many times Steve tells him he’s just focusing on school right now. 
A lie, he’s focused alright, but it sure as hell isn’t on school.
He didn’t tell Tommy any of that, though. Instead, he offered up his house for the weekend. Tommy’s always in a better mood when he has a party to look forward to. The boy had immediately perked up. 
Steve's kinda regretting it the next day, but he made his bed.
Eddie i like seeing you, it makes my day the disappearing act was real cute almost made me lose my damn mind, man, point taken do you got anything good planned for the weekend? i heard there’s a party  maybe i’ll see you there, with your new job and all p.s. have fun at your campaign (i learned what it’s called!)  -H 
Steve slips his sunglasses on during his walk to the cafeteria, and no it’s not just because he wants to stare freely at Eddie - he has a headache. Looking at Eddie is just a perk. 
He’s wearing a white shirt again. Steve has the freedom to look so much that his gaze strays to the other people at Eddie’s table and notices that they’re all wearing matching white shirts with the same print on the front. They printed matching shirts for their nerd club. 
Steve is gonna die.
seven
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sorry if i missed anyone!!
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placeinthemiddleofnowhere · 2 years ago
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Keep Moving Forward
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Pairing: König x Reader
Summary: You're determined to find out why everyone thinks König is so scary, afterall he's just some guy that's taller than most people right? He's probably harmless! Well, he's a little scary, but you still like him anyway.
(No use of y/n or mention of gender/race)
AN: Just want to say a massive thank you for everyones lovely comments on the last part, I can't believe how many notes that has now 😱 I've got a taglist so if you want to be added or removed (I just stuck down everyone that commented or reblogged the last one with tags/comments) lemme know! Also I've got my own version of what König looks like and I've been including details so hopefully you like my thoughts on him 🥰
Part 2 of A Rocky Start - Full Masterlist Here
-☠️-
A forbidden crush, a whole unit of men watching out for any missteps and a job that required you to be on your A game - it all sounded a bit like a bonkers netflix plot, but no this was your life now. You were desperately trying to hide your little (massive) König crush, while trying to get through your days and it was going horribly. The universe was working against you. 
König kept appearing for one. Now that he knew you weren’t talking to him just to fuck with him, you’d been meeting more and more and talking for longer each time. In fact, you’d come to learn a lot about the man in the short amount of time you’d spent together and unfortunately for you, nothing about any of it turned you off.  In fact, you were only falling harder for him. 
Every touch, every grazed hand when you were reaching for mugs and brushed sides when you sat together on the couch - they were driving you crazy. Not to mention catching little details about him here and there, painting a mental picture that rivalled the mona lisa. 
You’d caught a glimpse of a scar that snaked up from his lip and a few that marred his hands and arms, you’d noted bruises that carried back from missions and most of all you couldn’t help but think of the little birthmark on his left hip that he’d exposed when he’d been reaching for tea. You thought about running your fingers along them often, kissing them all better. 
You’d learned that it was pretty much pointless to make movie references to König because he barely took time to watch them. He was much more of a doer, he didn’t like to sit still for long and most film runtimes were over an hour and a half, which was no good for him. And so you’d slowly gotten a peek into his more active hobbies. Hiking, rock climbing and skiing, only to name a few. The man was an athlete that rivalled most of the soldiers you knew.  
“And this was the view from top!” he’d proudly said after he showed you another picture from one of his hikes.
“Woah, no wonder your legs are like tree trunks,” you’d murmured, raking your eyes over his thick thighs.
“What was that?”
“Oh! Just- you must get a good workout climbing all those hills.”
Just one of the many times you’d let your appreciation for him slip. You could barely help it most of the time, he had your words fizzling out like some kind of mentos and coke explosion. The highly trained soldier in you died the minute you were in a room with him. 
It was when he grabbed you that you finally went stupid for him. König was - as Captain Price had described him - a mammoth in many regards. You’d already taken note of his verging on monstrous height, but you’d come to learn a lot more about his strength. He could lift you like you were little more than a lap dog.
How had you come to find this out? Well -
“Watch out!”
Your head had been completely in the clouds, busy catching up with messages from your family, when suddenly you were in the air. You gasped as you felt a pair of hulking arms pick you like an apple from a low hanging branch and squeaked when you looked down and came to notice the pile of vomit that lurked below your flailing feet. Gross. 
Then you’d come to the slow realisation of exactly whose arms were wrapped around you. Suddenly the rising feeling of nausea was replaced by hordes of stirred up butterflies.
“Are you ok?” 
You blinked, still shocked that König was holding you like you were nothing.
“Uh- ah- yeah! Yup! All good, big guy!”
You’d hurried out your reply, sputtering out your words like a leaky tap. You felt like an idiot. Then the feeling intensified when he put you down and turned you to face him. In fact, you felt like someone had placed a heat pad to your face after running a marathon.
If he could lift you that easy when you were limp, imagine how easy he could lift you up against the wall and-
“Are you sure you’re ok? You look…not so good?.”
You gulped and offered him what you hoped was a reassuring smile and then - to make matters worse - a double thumbs up (who did that???). You silently cursed in your mind, but covered up your embarrassment by staring back at the sick pile for a second and then facing König again.
“Ew…thanks for saving me from that! I would’ve been throwing up as well if I’d had to clean that outta my shoes.”
“Any time, friend!”
Friend.
It stung a little, but then you had to remind yourself you were both supposed to be acting professionally, this was a base afterall, and quickly righted yourself. Friend would do fine in a setting where Price would have your head for even looking at König a little flirtily. Especially when the resident gossips had continued to grass you in for any interactions they caught. 
-☠️-
“That was some amount of whitey those new recruits left all over the hallways yesterday,” Soap had remarked after finishing a set of pull ups. 
You hummed in agreement, remembering back to being lifted and growing quiet as you thought about Königs bulging arms. It had been a recurring thought for the whole twenty two hours since it had happened. Not that you were counting or anything, especially not being obsessive by any means. It was just that the electricity that had been sparked by that touch had been racing around your body and now you were stuck replaying the scene over and over in your head like an accursed rerun. 
“English, Soap,” Ghost grunted, from a nearby bench. 
“There was a lot of puke all over the place yesterday,” Soap sighed, rolling his eyes at the Lieutenant. 
“Oh yeah, I heard about that. Did you hear sneaky almost stepped in it?”
“Ooft, that’d be a shite shift cleaning that off.”
“I know. Luckily little sneak got airlifted to safety,” Ghost said slyly, giving you a pointed look. “Got snatched away by a certain giant before they stepped right in it.”
You froze in your spot, just about to curl a weight upwards before letting it crash out of your hands and onto the floor. That fucking, no good old dear prick! How had he heard about that? You hadn’t thought anyone else had been around when it had happened. 
“Careful, sneak. The German’s not here to stop that from stubbing your toe,” Ghost chuckled.
“He’s Austrian actually…And how did you know about that?”
“Oooh! Austrian,” Soap snickered.
“Well I do apologise. You should know by now that I hear about everything when it comes to our unit, sweetheart.”
You hated that. Whenever Ghost patronisingly called you sweetheart it made your blood boil and clouded your thoughts like a thick red mist. Though, there was nothing you could do about it. He wasn’t someone you could wage revenge on without being thoroughly outgunned in all respects. Plus, it would only make you look more guilty. 
“Well, you didn’t even know what nationality König was so you don’t know everything,” you muttered.
“Well, now that you’ve filled me in, I can go tell Price you were getting lifted up by the big Austrian cunt that he told you to stay away from,” he countered smugly. 
“What! I can’t help who snatches me out of the air from nowhere,” you hissed. “Have you seen the size of him? I can’t exactly stop him.”
He tisked. 
“Well then, soldier. Sounds like you need more training. C’mere, we’ll practise getting out of holds!”
You yelped as Ghost had come crashing toward you and dove out of the way just in time to miss his outstretched arms. Even if he was smaller than your new companion, Ghost was still built like a tank - and he would pin you down like a mouse under the wheel of a 4x4 if he caught you. 
“Stay away from me!” you’d squealed, running away from the gym. 
“Oh now you’re suddenly averse to getting grabbed!”
-☠️-
Essentially, you were discovering a new level of hell every day. Your entire unit had cottoned on to your little thing with König and now there was no escape from the jokes they made. Well that is until Price came along and no one was quite enough of an asshole to mention your activities to him. You all knew the consequences of getting his back up and it wasn’t worth the stress for anyone. 
Though, not everyone was aware of that - König himself for one. Unluckily for you, you’d found yourself in the kitchen with Price and Soap and just as the kettle was put to the boil, who should walk in but the Austrian giant himself. 
“Evening,” he murmured, barely loud enough to be heard over the kettle. 
Soap looked up from his phone as he noticed König and widened his eyes before searching you out and giving you a sly smile. Oh lord. You knew he was going to love watching you squirm. 
Suddenly your heart was thudding like a samba drum and your mind was racing to find your self restraint. Don’t let Price see you turn into a nervous fucking wreck! You repeated that over and over like a mantra, turning it over in the sands of your mind as if you might find some calm that way. 
“Evenin’” you smiled, feeling your voice lilt.
Oh god. 
You smiled at König as he approached the counter and promptly scampered away to the table, hoping that by keeping some distance you wouldn’t be so transparent. Fat chance considering the stupid smirk that was all over Soap’s face as he pretended to batter his eye lashes behind Price’s back. Asshole!
You knew you looked guilty as hell, even if you were walking away from König. However, any chance of not being caught ogling by Price was worth taking. So you figured you’d stare at your phone instead and prayed to all the gods you knew of that König was busy and he’d have to leave again after getting himself something to drink. 
Why didn’t he ever go out for food? There was a perfectly nice pub just over the road and he could easily go there instead of looking over you all the time - putting you in grievous danger of toilet duty. You’d have to tell him about it sometime, and hope that he’d ask to go with you. 
“Anyone else want a brew?” Price offered, in the midst of pouring his own cup. 
You looked up from your phone screen, darting your eyes over to the captain. Answer him! Speak normally!
“Oh! Yes, me please.”
Maybe that was a little more polite and nicey-nice than usual, but at least you were coherent. That was something, a small victory.
“Coffee for me, Price,” Soap grinned. 
You breathed out a small sigh now that Price was distracted by Soap and let your eyes wander over to König, resting your chin in your hand. He was so big, he towered over the two other men by a few heads at least. He could pin you down like a lion and there’d be nothing you could do about it, nothing you’d want to do about it. 
“That’s the wrong one.”
You jumped as König’s accented voice interrupted the thankful silence and widened your eyes as you watched him turn to Price. What was he doing? You sucked in a breath and watched as the two men became locked into an exchange and silently hoped a rogue sniper might take you out. 
“Sorry, what was that?” Price asked, frowning deeply as he stared at the masked man.
“That’s the wrong tea,” König supplied helpfully. “Sneaky likes this one.”
As if correcting Price on his choice of tea wasn’t enough, König went to the lengths of picking a bag of your herbal stuff out. He dropped it into the mug and stuck the other bag back in the back, tilting his head as Price stared at him with a raised eyebrow. 
“Well then…thanks for the advice,” he finally said, turning to stare you down. “It’s never nice when you expect one thing and get the other.”
You were in deep shit. 
He was giving you the ‘I’ve killed before and I’ll do it again’ look. You gulped and slumped in your chair, feeling like a tiny child that was about to get reprimanded. Price was going to learn all about your involvement with König soon, the game was up. 
“Oh yeah, no problem!” König said, sounding like he was smiling under his mask. 
That idiot! 
Though, in fairness to him he knew nothing about the toilet duty thing. He didn’t even have any idea that you weren’t supposed to be interacting with him, especially when you’d gone so out of your way to do it over the past month. It wasn’t his fault, but at the same time you could strangle his beautiful massive neck for what he’d done. 
“Sneak, would you mind coming with me for a moment? I think we should have a little chat,” Price smiled. “I’ll bring your tea.”
He was probably omitting that he was going to dump it over your stupid head, you thought worriedly. This wasn’t good at all. 
You gulped and nodded at him, slinking out of your chair like a dog about to take a beating. Though, you continued to follow behind him just as dutifully - Ignoring Soap as he gave you a little wave off and a snarky smile. You knew as soon as you’d left that he was messaging the group chat right then, and the whole 141 would know that you were getting pulled up for speaking to König. 
He lead you down the hall and into an empty meeting room, setting the two mugs down on the table, they hit the wood like death knells, and pointed to the chair in front of him. It all felt very formal, like this was going to be one of the worst telling offs of your life. 
“Don’t look so scared, kid.”
You bit your tongue and chanced a look in his eyes, seeing the glint that lingered within them. He didn’t look furious, but he didn’t look like he was going to offer you a cuddle and kind words either. It made you sweat a little less, but you weren’t dumb enough to completely untense your body yet. 
“Y-you’re not annoyed that I’ve been speaking to König?” You asked, chancing your luck.
“Oh, I’m annoyed, but I’m not going to kill you for it,” he laughed humorlessly, leaning back in his chair. “You look like you’re going to shit yourself.”
“I think I might,” you said, biting your lip and fastening your shaky hands around your warm tea cup. 
“See, that’s why I’m concerned about this…relationship you’re building with König. I worry about you.”
You frowned, thoroughly surprised by his reaction. He was being a damn sight more sympathetic than you were expecting. This wasn’t a bollocking, this was an intervention. 
“You don’t have to worry. We’re just friends - strictly platonic! We talk and have tea together, nothing more than that,” you explain breathily, hoping it’ll appease the captain.
He strokes a hand through his beard and eyes you warily. He’s clearly unconvinced. His jaw is set into a worried line. 
“Hmm.”
He doesn’t give much away. 
“Really, I’m not trying to take things f-further.”
You stutter like a liar. Really, that is what you’re doing if you’re honest with yourself. You might not be asking König out on dates and braiding flowers into his gear, but you have been shamelessly flirting with him and getting into close proximity with him at the slightest chance. Plus, Price practically knows you better than your own parents, he’d be able to tell when you were acting differently, like you were in terminal stages of puppy love. 
“Look, he’s not part of our unit, so really it’s none of my business, I can’t actually do anything about it - as much as I’d like to,” he says, glowering for a moment. “I just think that he’s dangerous and I don’t like the thought of you getting close to him. For all I know, he’s nice enough to you, but when he’s on the field that man’s an animal. There’s something wrong with him.” 
You gasp a little as he says it, shocked that he’d say something like that to you. What did he mean there was something wrong with König? Sure, you thought, he was quiet and intimidating but he was so polite and cheerful when you’d gotten to know him more. It’s not like most people were their best selves on a battlefield - it was in your training to leave all that behind. It was hypocritical to judge Königs actions given your experience with the 141 out on missions. 
“What do you mean there’s something wrong with him?” You finally asked, curious to know just what Price meant. 
“He takes too much pleasure in the work he does. He’s sick when he’s out there- like letting a rabid dog out of its cage. I worry about you getting involved with him and being at the mercy of a man like that. You wouldn’t have any chance against him, Sneak. I’ve seen him crush bones like they’re twigs, he’d snap you like a toothpick.”
You can feel your pulse in your ears, can hear it working away like a jackhammer. You don’t know how to respond. The fact that Price is this worried for you really does concern you, but on the other hand König has never given you any reason to be scared of him beyond that first encounter you’d had with him. Then again, you reasoned that that surely wasn’t the real him - that was guarded walled up version of him. Right? 
“I see,” you sighed, not able to come out with more. 
“I know you won’t want to take my word for it, and you’re going to keep doing whatever it is you're actually doing. I just want to know that you’ve been warned and you’re going to be careful.”
You took a breath and looked away, roving your eyes over the assortment of chairs on the other side of the room. Sure, you could take his warning on. Though, it didn’t feel like it was going to stick, not when you thought back to his arms wrapped around you and making you feel like a precious gem. 
“I’ll keep what you’ve said in mind,” you acquiesced. 
“Good soldier,” Price smiled, leaning over and patting your shoulder.
You swallowed thickly and stood up, feeling your breathing return back to normal. Well that was it then. You weren’t going to be killed on sight and you didn’t have to worry about staring down the bowl of a toilet for the rest of your miserable life. 
You both stepped out the doorway and into the light of the hall. You felt dizzy on your feet, but relieved that you were getting away without any punishment. Well, other than the fact that König might be someone to worry about rattling around in the back of your mind, that is. Then again, you had a sneaking suspicion that you’d forget all about it as soon as you were in his company again…
“Remember what I said, Sneaky! Otherwise I’ll let you think about it some more while you’re on your knees scrubbing toilets,” Price said over his shoulder, taking an indulgent sip of his coffee afterwards. 
You stopped in your tracks and shared a look with Soap, who’d poked his head out of the kitchen to check on you. Well, maybe you weren’t going to completely forget Price’s warning. His lingering threat would keep you on your toes. 
-☠️-
“It seems a little late for you to be out walking,” you noted.
You watched as König whirled around, and went wide eyed when he looked like he might hit you. His fist was drawn back and just when it looked like he was about to swing it - he stopped and let it fall flatly to his side. As soon as he’d scanned his eyes over your shrinking form he went limp immediately. 
“Scheiße! Where the hell did you come from?” he cursed.
You took a moment to recover but eventually found your heartbeat returning to its regular rhythm and swallowed, relaxing your shoulders soon after. That was close. You assumed he’d have known you were sitting there on the wall, he always seemed to have a hyper awareness of you as if he was some kind of bat. Though his echolocation must have failed for once, you’d been too obscured by the untrimmed tree branches that had surrounded you, most likely.  
“I-I come out and sit here sometimes, its nice to look at the stars.”
König regarded the wall you were sitting on, just a low down thing made of worn stone and his head followed where it stretched down the road. It cut off the pavement from the small scatty park inside. Then when he looked back at you with his twinkling azure eyes, those eyes that had you forgetting all about the near miss that just happened, you finally got to take him in properly. You watched him as he settled next to you on your makeshift seat. 
Two things struck you all at once. Firstly, König was wearing a neck warmer instead of his usual sniper hood, probably so he wouldn’t scare any civilians more than a hulking giant like himself normally would, it was drawn way up to the bridge of his nose, but nevertheless you knew it was him under there. And next - the mess of shaggy dirty-blonde hair on top of his head. You had to fight the urge not to ask if you could run your hands through it. It was like putting a moth in front of a thousand watt bulb. You ached to feel the fuzz of his faded sides and get to rearrange the chaotic locks above that sprawled in every direction.
“You’re staring.”
You bit your lip as he said it, and looked away guiltily. Oh fuck. It’s not like it could be helped though, this was the most you’d gotten to see of him. He was always so covered up and burdened by gear you could barely make out the man from the material - and now you were getting to see what was basically a visual buffet of König. It wasn’t fair. You could look at every inch of him that he’d let you see all day. 
“Sorry,” you finally breathed out. “I just- uh was surprised is all.”
“Why?” he smirked, eyes crinkling as he stared right back. 
“Didn’t think you’d be blonde,” you say, thinking blessedly quickly. 
“What is it they say? Blondes have more fun?” he chuckled, coming to sit on the wall next to you. 
You snorted and looked away from him again. Even though you’d been talking for a while now, his silly humour could still surprise you, especially when you recalled the way everyone acted around him, as if he’d bite them if they got too close. It was like getting to see a tiger roll onto his stomach when no one else was around. 
“How come you don’t wear that around the base?” you asked, tilting your head at him.
“Why would I? I can wear my hood there without getting questioned about it.”
“But isn’t it less stuffy with the neck warmer?” You ask, crinkling your nose at the thought of being trapped under that heavy material all day. 
“Yes, but it’s as though I can physically feel people's eyes cutting into me when I wear this - or nothing. The staring is too much.” 
You pause for a second and laugh at yourself, feeling a little more embarrassed.
“...Like I was just doing to you there.”
König laughs a little with you, but after a second he shakes his head and breaths out into the frigid night air. The skies had been dark for a little while by that point and the light of the moon was bright and shiny, reflecting in König’s eyes like a gleaming pearl. It was probably the first time you ever recalled admiring the moon that much. 
“I didn't feel like I was being dissected by you, no.”
You felt a little tingle run rogue down your arm. So he didn’t mind you looking at him? You smiled a little wider to yourself and tried to conceal it with a scratch of your cheek. 
“Really? Why’s that?” You asked, feeling a little brave. 
“You stare at me all the time, I’m used to it.”
Instantly it felt as if the air had caught fire and was charring you into oblivion. He’d caught you? Why hadn’t he said anything before? You opened your mouth ready to come up with some kind of silly excuse, too flustered to think of something good. Though he interrupts you before you can get a sound out. 
“I didn't mean to embarrass you, I find it endearing,” he soothed.
“What? Why?” you ask dumbly.
“The way you look - with your wide doe eyes…” he says trailing off. 
Now he cant look at you. His head turns away. You can't speak either, so you're both left frozen in place.
“The way you’re looking at me now,” he finally says.
“Maybe I just can’t stop staring at your messy hair,” you chuckle, trying to awkwardly change the subject. “Someone should fix that for you.”
“Does someone want to?” he asks, his brows setting as he tilts his chin. 
Oh no. You bite your lip feeling like your body’s going to astrally project onto another planet. Was this really happening? Did he actually just give you permission to touch him, no, run your hands through his hair? 
Part of you wants to laugh him off and prevent any embarrassment when he turns around and says he was kidding, says you’re a weirdo for wanting to touch him like that. Your mind starts going down avenues of all the awful things he could say about the little freak that looks at him too much, but then the sane part of your mind kicks and acts as a buffer stop, halting the run away anxiety train. König would never do that to you. 
You were far too used to dealing with Ghost and Soap, and all of their stupid teasing. But even then, not even they would do something so cruel. 
“I do,” you murmur. 
König nods and leans forward and closes his eyes, giving you what little advantage he can with the amount of height he has on you. At first, you’re incredulous that you’re in a real life scenario and not locked into a fantasy seven layers deep, but you quickly give up that idea and decide to tentatively reach out. You’re too excited not to take the opportunity. 
Your hand shakes a little at first as you make contact with his soft hair, and immediately you think of the devil dog your neighbour used to have when you were a kid. It was a huge old thing that barked like a foghorn, but once it got to know you, it would roll over and present its downy fur and you could spend hours at a time running your hands through it. Now, though, it’s not the scary shepherd you’re taming, it’s König. 
He sits perfectly still while you sort through all the strands, smoothing them back and fixing them into place. You swear you can hear soft groans coming from him, but they’re so quiet you could be mistaken. That, and you’re too mesmerised by the task at hand, forming his hood mussed hair into a style. 
When you’re done and his hair is mostly settled - apart from a small cow lick you can’t seem to fix - you can’t help but run your fingers over the fuzz on the side of his head. Immediately he shivers like a harsh breeze has rolled in, surprising you, but when he snaps his eyes open they don’t look annoyed like you worry he is, instead he looks ready to pin you down and take you right there against the wall.
“That felt very nice,�� he said softly, blown out pupils shifting away from you as he straightened.
You’re not sure what to say, you just smile and bite your lip, keeping your eyes fixed on him. You know rightly that your pupils are just as wide as his, you can practically feel the explosion that’s going on. You want him. 
“König I… I uh-“ 
Footsteps sounding from nearby, crunching up the leaf littered pavement, interrupt all your thoughts and both of you turn your heads as someone walks up to you both. You hold in a breath, feeling like you’d scream otherwise and watch as a face comes into view from out of the shadows. 
Mercifully it’s not Ghost or Soap that marches up to you, it’s Gaz.He’d been the only one not to completely batter the dead ‘Sneaky and König up a tree’ horse. He stops when he sees you both and his eyes widen as he spots König, probably just as shocked as you were when he realised he can see his face. Though, he quickly averts his eyes and looks at you instead, awkwardly shifting his hands in his hoodie pocket. 
“Captain said to tell you we’ve got an early start tomorrow,” he says looking at you pointedly , “we’ve got a briefing at four. Said you best get all the sleep you can.” 
“Oh…do you know anything about it?” You ask, still feeling a bit breathless from before.
“From what I gather, the 141 and KorTac are heading out together, but I don’t know much beyond that,” he shrugs. 
You give a sideways glance to König and watch as he regards you the same way. That meant you’d be working together for the first time. You take a breath and look back at Gaz, finally nodding your head.
“Thanks for coming to let me know, I’ll head in in a minute,” you assure him. 
Gaz nods back curtly and turns on his heel, retreating to the base again and leaving you alone in the only silence. You finally look back at König, only once you’re sure there’s no one lurking around and looking to catch you with him, and smile softly. 
“Looks like we’ll be working together then,” you laugh awkwardly.
“Seems like it,” he replies, lowering his head. “Perhaps we should listen to the captain’s advice and head in.”
You feel a stab of disappointment tear through your heart immediately. You’d wanted to resume things from where you’d left off. You wanted to pull back the cloth from his face and kiss him under the stars as if they were watching and you were the only ones there. There were fireworks and sparklers going off in your mind, but now they were being snuffed out as you watched König stand up from your not so secret spot. 
“Come on, you need your rest,” he insists, holding out his hand. 
You raise your eyebrows, but put your hand in his and rise as he guides you up. Even with you standing, he towers above you. It’s especially noticeable as you stand so close to him, almost pressed to his big wide chest. There’s a snapping creature in your mind that distantly wishes to jump onto him and kiss him, but you beat the thought back and look away from König instead.
“Hey,” he says softly, tilting your head back with his rough gloved fingers. “I want to pick things back up too, but…not before a mission. We can do this again after all that. Yeah?” 
You gulp, feeling your spine light on fire with tingles. Did he just acknowledge that things were about to go further there? So he definitely felt the same as you…
“Makes sense,” you murmur, feeling your desperation roll off you in waves. 
He is speaking sense, but you don’t want him to be. 
“You can fix my hair for me again when we get back,” he teases, rubbing his finger against your jaw again. “I’m sure it will be very messy.”
“Am I your stylist now?” You smirk, feeling your mood lift. 
“Amongst other things,” he says, eyes showing the smile that was surely on his lips. 
You raise your eyebrows and just as you’re about to ask what things, he silences you with what he does next. He leans down and brings his lips to your cheek, and through his mask, kisses you. 
You freeze in place, your heart thudding like it’ll explode and close your eyes. You can’t believe what just happened. You laugh a little to yourself - letting loose a giggle and open your eyes, watching as he smiles back at you and gestures his hand back to base. 
“To be continued,” you whisper to yourself.
-☠-
Next Part Here
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just-jordie-things · 1 year ago
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you know you got me in your pocket - okkotsu yuuta
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word count: 13k warnings: light swearing.  reader has a cursed technique that has to do with healing but i don’t explain it bc i’m lazy. summary: the path from friends to lovers may take time but it is a simple, true love they share more info: ultimate friends to lovers fic this IS the template a/n: loosely based on this fanart i found on pinterest and also the song always forever by cults bcuz i love that song its so friends to lovers coded ___
[ you and me, always, forever ]
Unlike most cases of friends who harbor crushes for each other but never seemed to figure it out, (y/n) had taken a liking to Yuuta the day they met.  She’d known right away that there was something about him that drew her to him like a magnet, something adorably mysterious, strangely alluring, and completely thrilling.
Seeing him on campus wasn’t a surprise.  Gojo had told her about his recruitment, and upon giving her further detail she’d lovingly told him it was more of a kidnapping.  He’d laughed.  And since then nothing had really changed.  She continued her studies with Shoko in the infirmary, only occasionally seeing the Six Eyes when he needed a new audience to bother, and in fact, she’d almost forgotten the news of a new student her age.
It’s not like there were many instances where she could be reminded.  She didn’t see the other students at Jujutsu Tech often, since they spent their time training to be sorcerers, while her cursed technique was more equipped for the behind the scenes of jujutsu society.  
So when she feels a heavy presence of cursed energy looming through the front gates, the hair on the back of her neck stands up, and she’s unusually drawn out of her studies to scan the area for the source of the prickle traveling down her spine.
If she didn’t know better, she might have just assumed it was just Gojo.  But it only takes a split second for her to identify this as someone else entirely.  She’s not sure if her shiver is due to fear or intrigue, but either way she just has to learn more, doesn’t she? 
And so you could imagine her surprise when she finally catches the sight of the sorcerer carrying all of this cursed energy, dragging along the main path on his way to the main building.  She can’t recall his name right away, but she assumes he’s the new kid that Gojo had told her about a week or so prior.
She’s far enough away that she doesn’t get a good look at him, but she can see enough from where she sits amongst the trees.  He’s not at all what she had been expecting.
He didn’t look like the piece of shit egotistical douchebag that she had assumed he’d be when Gojo had told her about him.
And if she couldn’t feel the cursed energy radiating off of him even from this far away, she might’ve thought he was a non-sorcerer altogether.
His shoulders sagged like gravity was heavier on him than most people.  He moved slowly.  His sneakers scraped along the pavement.  His hands were fiddling with each other anxiously, fingers catching and pulling and twisting over and over.
Perhaps she was letting her curiosity make her naive, but any fear she might have felt when he first entered the courtyard dissipated as she tracked his awkward movements towards the school.  Awkward.  It was the perfect way to describe her first impression of him.
He hadn’t seemed to notice her during her assessment of him.  And this was proven when their paths did properly cross.
It had happened late one evening, shortly after Yuuta’s initial admittance to Jujutsu Tech.  It only took one text from Shoko for her to be out of bed, in her uniform, and on her way to the infirmary.  Apparently, Yuuta was also racing around campus, for whatever reason, and that’s how he (almost literally) ran into her.
“Oh!” 
His greeting was just as awkward as her first impression of him.  She can’t help but laugh a little bit.  He’s clearly flustered, his eyes wide and his mouth not making any proper words, and the large knife in his hand looks severely out of place.
But he must see her look straight at it while he’s trying to figure out how to politely ask who the hell she was because he’s never seen her before- because suddenly he remembers how to speak.
“This isn’t mine!” 
He doesn’t mean to shriek, but he feels like he should explain why he’s running around at night with a knife.  It doesn’t dawn on him at all that she’s used to people casually carrying weapons around, and this little knife isn’t even close to being a concern for her.
Nonetheless, she goes along with it.  She should be rushing to the infirmary, but something keeps her put before him.
“Oh?” She tries not to laugh as she takes in his heavy wince.  “While I find your courage outstanding, I’m not sure this is the place you want to go stealing people’s knives,” She’s only teasing, but it does nothing to relieve the panic on his face.  “You know, cause people around here don’t need knives to kill you,” 
Yuuta swallows, and (y/n) finally gives him a break and shakes her head as she laughs to herself.
He expresses his anxiousness in small shuffles of his feet, and he tries to laugh along but the sound is strained and nervous.  If she knew him better and understood him, she likes to think she’d tell him to lighten up, but that feels like a bold step, so she tries to ease his anxiety with more subtlety.
“You didn’t spook me with that knife,” She clarifies.  “I’d be more scared of all that cursed energy you’ve got, if anything” 
“O-oh” 
“But I’m not,” She tells him, matter-of-factly.
He gives her a look like he’s not sure if he should believe her.  With the way the other students had reacted when they first met, he’s surprised she doesn’t have him in a chokehold right now.  Instead, she stands before him without a defensive stance, and she gives him a small smile.
“But… what are you doing out this late?” She can’t help but have curiosity about what he was doing there in the first place.  “Aren’t you all going out on an assignment first thing in the morning?”
Normally, she didn’t listen much when Gojo rambled on about his teachings.  However yesterday’s lessons with Shoko had been few and far between, so when her old friend stopped by for entertainment, she boredly listened along while he bragged about taking his class on a group outing.  She supposed that little piece of information became useful for small talk now.
“Yeah, well,” Yuuta sighed, rubbing the back of his neck anxiously.  “I was supposed to return this earlier, but I forgot, and now I…” 
His words trail off, along with his eyes as he turns to stare at the floor out of embarrassment.
“I got lost” 
“It’s Maki’s, isn’t it?” She asks knowingly, even though she’s not familiar with this knife.
Yuuta nods.
“I’ll show you the way” She says, gesturing for him to follow her, and walking off before he could really comprehend what she was offering.  His sneakers squeak on the linoleum floor as he rushes after her a few seconds delayed.
He takes a minute or two before he finds the courage to say something.
“Thank you,” He settles, peeking over at her from the corner of his eye.  “I’m Yuuta, by the way” 
She turns to give him a beam as she replies, “I know,”
It has a lump forming in his throat, his chest filling with something warm and akin to bashfulness.  He’d never seen her before, and he was certain he would have remembered if they’d met, especially since she was so pretty, but she appeared to be his age too, and he wondered why she hadn’t been around for any classes, or training sessions.
“I’m (y/n)” She introduces herself after a beat passes.  Yuuta wants to say something more, but he doesn’t know what to say, so he doesn’t say anything at all.
He fidgets with the knife as he follows her through the corridors.  It’s a large building, and the longer they walk, the more he’s grateful he hadn’t gotten more lost than he had.  It takes a few minutes until she finally stops at a door, and slides it open.  Yuuta recognized it as soon as it’s contents were revealed.
Every inch of the walls were filled with weapons.  Racks with blades and staffs of all shapes and sizes, shelves of an assortment of more alternative weapons, he’d been in here when Gojo had given him a speedy tour on his first day.  Although now that he’s not being rushed from room to room, his gaze travels around the small space, taking in every deadly tool here.
“You’ll get used to it” (y/n) speaks, and he’s drawn out of his reverie when she plucks the knife from his hands to put it back in it’s proper place.
“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to any of this” He mumbles back, eyes caught on a rather daunting gun propped up among other things.
Nunchucks and knives were one thing.  He was pretty sure that was an AK-47.  He’d only ever seen those in movies.
(y/n) chuckles softly, amused by how out of place he seemed.  For a guy with more cursed energy than he knew what to do with, she found it interesting how juvenile he came across.
Not that it was a bad thing.  It was sort of… refreshing, if she thought about it.
“You will,” She assured him kindly.  “It’ll feel weird for a while, but, yaknow.  Eventually everyone settles in, right?” 
He tears his eyes away from the machine gun to see that she’s giving him a small smile, and he doesn’t know her very well, or at all, but he can tell that she’s being genuine.
“I guess”
He doesn’t know what else to say.
“Well, I have to get going to a lesson,” She explains, jerking her thumb back towards the door.  “You good to get back to your dorm? I probably wouldn’t get in trouble if I explained I was just helping the new kid” 
Yuuta nods, the movement awkward, and shaky.
“Yeah, I’m good, I think” He doesn’t sound so sure, but (y/n) assumes the best way for him to learn his way around is to get lost just a little.
“Alright, I’ll see ya around then,” She gives him a wave as she ducks out of the small armory.  “Good luck with your assignment tomorrow!”
Her voice carries as she jogs through the corridors to quickly get to where Shoko was waiting, leaving Yuuta to linger, a bit dumbfounded and bewildered by the whole interaction.
He supposed he’d gotten her name, but he still had no clue who she was.  He’d have to make a better effort to reach out next time their paths crossed.  She was the first person here to give him a semi-warm welcome, after all.
When (y/n) arrived at the infirmary with a brighter-than-usual smile and the remnants of a blush on her cheeks, Shoko eyed her curiously, but didn’t outwardly call her out on the strange demeanor.
[ say you’ll stay, never be severed ]
The next time Yuuta does see (y/n), he’s sitting alone at a picnic table in the courtyard with only the company of his lunch bag.  He sees her walking out of the building with a bag on her shoulder.  She’s clearly on a mission, but he finds himself calling out to her and waving his hand anyways.
He assumes she’ll give him a polite nod and keep heading on her way, but she stops in her tracks to turn his way, waving back, before she’s actually walking over to him.
It’s embarrassing to admit, but Yuuta panics a bit.  He had yet to form any solid enough friendships with the other students in his year, hence the lunching alone out here, and he had a worry that soon she would also see him as a loner and an outsider, and she’d avoid him too.
But as she approaches the wooden table, she gives him a smile so friendly he could never believe it was forced.
“Hey,” Even her voice sounds kind.  “You eating alone?” 
“Uh-” Yuuta glances around as if looking for an excuse, but the bento box in front of him and lack of any other person around is evidence enough.  “Yeah” He replies sheepishly.
Here it comes, Yuuta braces himself, the beginning of her thinking he’s a loner.  He shouldn’t have even held onto that scrap of hope when she’d walked this way, but here he was, holding his breath.
“Want company?”
His head turns back to her, assessing if she really meant it, and seeing that small smile still curled on her lips, he gives her a short nod.
“Yeah,” He answers.  “Yeah, that’d be… nice” 
Her small smile turns into a grin as she sits on the bench across from him, setting her bag on the table.
“How are you settling in?” She asks him kindly, and he gives a weak shrug of his shoulders.
“I guess… as well as I can,” He says honestly, and she nods back in understanding.  He pushes past the urge to sit in silence where he knows he can’t say the wrong thing, and continue talking to her.  She’s nice, he tells himself.  She’s nice, and I want to make friends here.  I want to be happy here.  “I think everyone’s a little afraid of me, to be honest,” He admits.  “Or they’re annoyed with how behind all of them that I am” 
“Maki can be a little stand-offish,” (y/n) thinks aloud.  “And Inumaki is hard to get to know at first.  But he’s a really nice guy once you do get to know him.  Just don’t be nervous when he’s silent.  He’s a goofball,” 
Yuuta takes her advice to heart, hoping that she could give him all the keys to friendship he’d been lacking.  He nods earnestly.
“And so is Panda,” She continued.  “But it’s been awhile since there’s been someone new around here.  That doesn’t really happen for us” 
“Really?” He asks, and she nods.
“Yeah.  Most of these people have known each other since they were young.  Or at least are aware of each other’s clan politics” 
“I see” Yuuta mumbles, feeling yet again like an outsider.  (y/n) can tell this information doesn’t sit well with him.
“I think it’s nice,” She says boldly, and truthfully.  He stares at her like she just said something ridiculous.  “When the only people you get to see every day are people you’ve known your whole life, it can be sorta lonely,” She admits with a small chuckle.  “It’ll be nice to get to know someone new,” 
She leans over the table a bit, setting her elbows down so she can rest her head in her hands.
“If that’s not too forward” She says with a bashful smile.
Yuuta blinks once, twice, before shaking his head with certainty.
“It’s not” He says, fast.
“Good,” (y/n’s) beam brightens.  “Want to have lunch with me again tomorrow?” 
He nods again, his nerves starting to melt away, letting him smile back at her.
“Will you be in class tomorrow?” He asks hopefully.  Maybe now he’ll finally have someone he can sit with, even if he’s still too shy to strike up a conversation, at least he won’t feel so alone all the time.
“Oh,” (y/n’s) lips quickly fall to a frown.  “I’m actually not one of Gojo’s students,” She tells him, and it makes her sad to see him deflate so fast.  “I’m training in the infirmary, with Shoko.  Have you met her?” 
Yuuta shakes his head.
“I don’t think so” 
“Well I’ll introduce you sometime,” She tells him.  “But I don’t have a decent enough cursed technique to be a sorcerer, so I’m studying under her in order to go more into the… background things” She explains.
“I see,” Yuuta tries not to let his disappointment show, so as not to make her feel bad.  He focuses instead on getting to know her better.  “So you’re working in, like, the medical field then?”
(y/n) nods her head from side to side.
“Something like that,” She chuckles.  “It’s mostly watching Shoko use her technique to heal injuries after rougher assignments.  I don’t get to use mine too much, but I’m starting to learn how to heal myself, so that’s a start, I suppose” 
“That’s cool!” 
(y/n’s) eyes blink wide in surprise.
“You can heal yourself?”
“I mean, I healed a papercut once” She laughs bashfully.  In comparison to Shoko’s reverse cursed technique, doing a shoddy job at patching up a small slice on her finger seemed like a joke.  But Yuuta grins like he’s never heard anything more interesting.
“You’re lucky,” He tells her, and she raises a brow at him, wondering if this was all some elaborate prank where he’d wind up laughing in her face at how weak she was compared to everyone else, compared to him.  “That’s a really useful ability.  That’s not background at all.  It’s helpful” 
As she processes the kind words, (y/n) wonders if this is why she’d felt drawn to him when they met a few nights ago.  Underneath the shy exterior Yuuta displayed was nothing but kindness, and warmth.  She could feel it in her cheeks, and in her chest.  Her heart even stuttered a little.
“I mean, I barely have a handle on it,” She admits.  “I don’t think I’ve been all that helpful to anyone” 
“But you’re learning, right?” Yuuta shrugs a shoulder in understanding.  “I guess that’s sorta how I feel, too,” He realized, dropping his gaze to his forgotten lunch as he thought about it.  “I just want to be…”
He trails off, but (y/n) waits with eager anticipation for him to continue his thought.
“Useful”
His voice is quiet, and his expression is unsure as he looks back up at her.  Suddenly feeling like that was far too pathetic of a thing to say to someone that he’d like to become friends with.  But before he can backtrack and supply a better word, like strong or courageous, she’s grinning.
Her face nearly splits in two as her beam stretches from ear to ear, all teeth and twinkling eyes to match.  A small laugh escapes her before she starts to nod passionately.
“That’s exactly how it feels,” She agrees, filling him with relief so strong it’s visible in the way his shoulders relax.  (y/n) notices, but doesn’t say anything.  Something warm and fuzzy nestles in her chest, and she has a good feeling about this new friendship blossoming.
Truth was, (y/n) got along fine with the other students here, but they’d only cross paths on occasion and she couldn’t say that she was necessarily close to any of them, simply on good terms enough to catch up in brief passing with one another.  The disconnect between her studies and the rest of the sorcerers-in-training around here was a trench of a gap, and if she was honest with herself, it could prove to be a little lonely.
Shoko was a great teacher, she was kind and involved, but she was still a teacher.  Gojo was… about the same, with just a bit more peskiness to him when it came to involving himself.  But it was all in good nature, he knew that she was a bit isolated here.
But then Yuuta came along.  And even just this short interaction had her glowing with excitement at finally forming a connection with someone.  He probably thought she was just being pleasant since he was the new kid and he’d been eating lunch alone, but it couldn’t be further from the truth.  She had a genuine interest in him that had started innocently enough, but she had a feeling it would only blossom into something more.
“I think that we’re going to be-” 
She’s about to voice this thought, about to tell him that she knows in her heart that they’ll make excellent friends, but her timing was just a tad too slow, and she was interrupted by her phone ringing.
With the intention of silencing it and ignoring the call for now, she gives him an apologetic look before pulling it out of her pocket, only to huff when she realizes it’s not a call she can just silence.
“Sorry,” She frowns.  “It’s Shoko, I should take this, she’s probably got something for me back at the lab” 
“It’s alright,” Yuuta smiles as he shakes his head in understanding.  “I get it” 
“Thanks,” (y/n) grabs her bag as she jumps up from the table, disappointed to cut their time short, but excited to see what Shoko would have in store for her today.  Before she can race off, she pauses, one hand gripping the strap of her bag and the other occupied with the phone that’s still ringing.  “Lunch tomorrow though, right?” She double checks.
The pink that dusts Yuuta’s cheeks is undeniable, and it makes a smile bloom on her face, too.
“Right” He says with a shy nod while he rubs his clammy hands over his knees.
“Alright,” (y/n) nods back, and she’d like to think she’s smooth, but she’s blushing just the same.  “I’ll see you tomorrow then, Okkotsu” 
She takes off before she can see his face turn from pink to red, his enthusiasm for having plans with a friend- a cute friend- shining in the heat of his cheeks.  
He spends the rest of his lunch period trying to think of things to talk to her about tomorrow, questions to ask, stories to share.  He racked his brain for fifteen minutes before going to class, where he then gets a little lost in space as he wonders about it some more.
[ you know you got me in your pocket, you don’t just have to wait around ]
When (y/n) feels that lingering fuzziness in her chest turn into something more, it was shortly after she’d spent the better half of an hour telling Shoko that her friendship with Okkotsu Yuuta was just that.  Friendship.
“If you say so,” The woman shrugged a shoulder as she pulled the gloves off of her hands, getting ready to wrap up the day.  “Just sayin’.  You talk about him a lot” 
(y/n) gave her a look, blindly tossing her own latex gloves into the trash.
“He’s my friend, I like talking about him,” She explains with nonchalance, even though her heart stuttered in her chest a little bit, as it did every time she mentioned him.  “And I’m also a boring person.  There’s not much to talk about”
“That’s not true, but whatever” Shoko brushes off the lame excuse, and (y/n) rejoices inwardly that the topic can be dropped before Yuuta actually shows up in a few minutes.  
Like most days, they had plans to meet up for lunch, except today they’ll be spending it with the rest of the first years.  After a couple of months, Yuuta finally felt like he belonged here, and had made decent friendships with his peers.  This morning he had texted her to ask if it was alright if they joined them.
[yuuta] : panda offered us seats at the lunch table with inumaki and maki too. do you want to have lunch with them? 
[yuuta] : ok if not!! just wanted to extend the invitation !!
It had made (y/n) smile when that second text popped up so quickly on her phone after she’d opened the first right away.  She could practically see him back pedaling just in case she wasn’t comfortable with a larger group for lunch.  Of course she was, she’d typed back an agreement with a little smiley face within a few seconds of reading the texts, but it was sweet that he’d stick to their usual plan of just the two of them.
Don’t get her wrong, (y/n) had grown to really cherish the time the two of them spent together.  She got to know Yuuta very well during their lunch breaks, and during a few hangouts after lessons and training, too.  She was happy to see how much he opened up once you got to know him, and she loved learning more about him every day.  He was kind, and funny in that nervous sort of way, and he picked up on things quickly.  
The couple of times (y/n) had spent her breaks from the infirmary on the bleachers to watch him train with the other first years, she’d seen a drastic change in his abilities with each session.  It wasn’t often that she was able to slip away long enough to get all the way to the bleachers, watch for a bit while having a snack or catching up on some reading, and then get back to the infirmary before Shoko called her out on trying to ditch her lessons.  Still, she was always impressed with how fast of a learner Yuuta was.  Whether it was with cursed energy or with a bamboo staff to practice wielding a proper katana, he seemed to be comfortable with learning how to fight.
In fact the last time she’d watched him, he looked so natural she could have assumed he’d grown up in jujutsu society just like the rest of them.
When he does make an appearance at the infirmary, Shoko notices him outside the door first.  With a smirk, she nods her head to get (y/n’s) attention.
“Your friend is here,” She says with a teasing lilt in her voice, despite her face remaining as stoic as usual.  
(y/n) gives her a look before turning around to see him waiting politely outside.  When their eyes catch, she gives him a smile and waves at him to come in.
“Picking you up for lunch, hm?” Shoko hums.  “What a little gentleman”
(y/n) shoots her another look, this time as if to say be nice when Yuuta walks in.  He’s still wearing his sheath, but the awkward smile and nervous fiddling of his hands makes a sword on his back look out of place.  For some reason, (y/n) has always found his simple juxtapositions adorable.
Despite having met Shoko before, a few times, actually, Yuuta always gets anxious around her.  It was probably her quietly peculiar aura, something (y/n) had grown used to after so much time spent with her, but in comparison to Yuuta’s teacher who’d never learned to revel in peaceful silence, it could be intimidating.
He gave her a small wave and nod in greeting.  Shoko smirked back at him before turning to (y/n).
“You two get back before too long, alright? No funny business” 
Yuuta visibly paled, his mouth opening to make an explanation that wasn’t coming to mind and left him standing there gaping.  (y/n) rolled her eyes as she grabbed her bag, hoisting the strap over her shoulder as she waved Shoko off.
“Bye Shoko” She said with a half-playful glare, before grabbing Yuuta by the sleeve and dragging him right back out the door before he even got the chance to say hello.
It’s not until they’re out in the hall that he finds his voice.
He tugs at his collar to relieve some of the heat from his neck.
“How were lessons today?” He settles for the safe topic of conversation.  Predictably, (y/n) lets out a small laugh.  She always seemed amused when he was uncomfortable.  He had yet to understand why.
“Good,” She’s kind to him today, not teasing him for his flustering.  At least not beyond that little smirk that makes her eyes glint when she looks at him.  “You?”
He nods his head from side to side.
“Maki kicked my ass,” He said sheepishly.  “But I did get a hit today” He said in a quieter voice, but there was still a hint of pride in his voice.  (y/n) beamed at him.  She understood this was a meaningful accomplishment.
“That’s awesome!” She cheered for him.  “You’ll knock her down next time for sure,” 
He thinks she could be messing with him, but when he looks over at her, her beam is nothing but genuine.  He laughs quietly, not as sure as she was, but appreciative of the sentiment nonetheless.
“Just make sure to invite me next time you spar,” (y/n) continues.  “I want to be there for the big day” 
Sometimes, she has a way of speaking that makes Yuuta wonder why she doesn’t really hang out with anyone but him.  She wasn’t exactly a soft person, he supposed it was this line of work they shared, but there was something inherently friendly about her.  He’d noticed it the first time they’d met, of course, and ever since he couldn’t ignore it if he tried.  For whatever reason, she seemed not only to care about him, but she actually believed in him, too.  More and more, Yuuta began to wonder why.
Inumaki, Panda, and Maki are already at a table with their lunches before them when Yuuta and (y/n) arrive.  Panda notices them first, grinning and waving a paw for them to join.
“(y/n)! Long time no see!” His voice holds pure joy upon her arrival, “How’s the infirmary?” 
“Oh, you know,” (y/n) smiles as she shrugs her shoulders.  “Blood.  Bones.  Repeat.  I can’t complain” 
Panda and Toge are sitting on one side of the table, Maki on the other, and (y/n) happily sits beside her.  Yuuta follows shortly.
“Yuuta told me next time, he’s going to knock your ass out,” She says boldly.  Maki raises a brow, her chopsticks stilling over her dish.  “You’ll let me come watch, yeah?” 
Maki’s eyes shift to Yuuta, a glare behind them that has him straightening in his seat.  Maki smirks at his discomfort, and when she turns back to (y/n), she grins ear to ear.
“I do love an audience,” She agrees, her smirk stretching into a grin at the idea.  She looks back to Yuuta, who’s focused intently on his rice.  “You two have been gettin’ real chummy, huh?”
(y/n) simpered at the comment.  Yuuta tucked his chin against his collar in hopes that they wouldn’t notice the way his face bloomed with heat.
“Tuna, tuna” Inuamki giggles as his elbow bumps into Panda’s arm, and he too begins to chuckle as they watch the pair’s reactions to Maki’s simple observation.
“(y/n’s)- uh- she’s-” 
“Yuuta’s a great friend” (y/n) speaks before Yuuta’s stammering can be laughed at any further.
“Must be, to make you finally come hang out with us” Panda says as he tries to quell his amused chuckling.
“Ikura” Toge mutters.
“Yeah,” Panda nods in agreement with the cursed speech user.  “We didn’t think you liked us anymore” 
Yuuta peeks over at (y/n) in his peripheral vision, but she plasters on a smile and shakes her head to disagree.
“Been busy” She says simply.  There is no follow up, no explanation or excuse.  She pops a grape into her mouth and leaves it at that.
Their lunch continues on as expected.  Catching up, teasing, swapping food.  Thirty minutes seem to pass faster than ever.  And despite enjoying himself amongst his friends, Yuuta can’t help but hyperfixate on that small, odd interaction.
It appeared as though (y/n) and the other first years had gotten along just fine.  Even mirroring old friends.  But he couldn’t help but feel like something was off, that things hadn’t always been this way, that there was a rift he hadn’t been present for.  He knows better than to question it straight away, so he matches energy and remains friendly the rest of the break.
But after telling his classmates he’ll meet up with them shortly, he lingers at the table while (y/n) packs up her things.
“That was nice” His voice feels stiff.  He clears his throat.
(y/n) looks up at him as she pulls the strap of her bag over her shoulder, a soft smile curling on her lips.
“It was” She affirms.
Yuuta shifts his weight from foot to foot as he tries to find the right thing to say next.  (y/n) watches this, and waits, patiently, for him to continue.
“I mean I… I like having lunch just… us,” He says, slowly, afraid of sounding too forward and insinuating something that could be off putting to her.  “But I’m glad you wanted to hang out with…” 
He struggled to find the right thing to say.  (y/n) tilted her head at him curiously, before providing the words for him.
“Your friends?” She suggests with a small smile.
Yuuta blinks, color spreading over his cheeks before his smile mirrors hers, and then he nods.
“Yeah,” He concurred.  
It must have been a rush of courage that compelled him to say what he did next, because as soon as he said it out loud, blood rushed up his neck and into his cheeks.
“You’re a great friend, too, by the way.  I’m glad you were here.  Or, well, are here”
She laughs, not because what he was was funny, but because she was overcome by delight by his words that she simply couldn’t contain it.  Her fingers curl tightly around her bag, her heart flutters with something sickeningly sweet in her chest.
This was that something more.  This wasn’t just silly eagerness towards a new friend.  This much more.  It was heavy.  It filled her heart until it burst and flooded her body with warmth, traveling down her spine in ticklish sparks, and ending in the tips of her fingers and toes.  It almost felt like cursed energy, the way it buzzed through her excitedly, on it’s own accord, but she knew better.
This was infatuation.  She was infatuated with Yuuta.  She had feelings for Yuuta.
“I’m glad you’re here, too, Yuuta,” She speaks with every genuine bone in her body, now reinforced with that tingling feeling that has her soft smile turning into a full blown grin.  “Really glad” She repeats softly.
He should feel embarrassed because he knows he’s blushing and he’s having a hard time holding eye contact with her, but for some reason, he doesn’t feel embarrassed at all.  Instead he smiles, bright and beautiful.
“I- I have to-” 
“You have class,” (y/n) laughs bashfully, turning away in an attempt to calm her warm cheeks and dopey grin.  “You should go before you’re late- I- I should go before I’m late” She stammers over her words, which is unlike her and more like him.
“Right, yeah,” He nods in a jerky motion as he starts to turn to leave, realizing he was going to have to run now if he wanted to make it on time.  “But I’ll- I’ll see you after? Maybe? Or do you have plans already we can just wait till tomor-” 
“After lessons works” (y/n) agrees.
“Okay- okay, yeah,” He’s still beaming, giddy with excitement now.  “After lessons” He repeats.
(y/n) giggles as she begins to make her way back towards the infirmary, in the opposite direction as him.  She gives him a small wave as she takes off, and Yuuta’s stunned in place for a moment before realizing that his tardiness was going to get him into trouble.
When (y/n) bursts through the infirmary doors with a string of excuses and pink cheeks, Shoko doesn’t say a word.  Not that she has to, her face says it all.
Yuuta is not spared in the same way.  When Gojo asks where he’s been, Panda is happy to supply what- or who- had kept him occupied.  He was teased relentlessly for the following fifteen minutes, but it didn’t bother him too much.  Sure, he was a little awkward at handling it and brushing off their assumptions.  He just hoped his classmates wouldn’t meddle and tell her about it later.
[ just come here and we can settle down ]
If Yuuta ever underestimated anything in his life, it was Gojo Satoru’s joy in meddling.
It’s a few weeks after the Night Parade of a Hundred Demons.  Jujutsu High is still under reconstruction, but it’s getting somewhere.  The gardens are being replanted, the courtyard isn’t just a pile of rubbish anymore, and slowly but surely, everyone is healing.
Especially thanks to (y/n), who had mastered her cursed technique.  Just in time too, as there were a lot of people that needed help.
Maki was finally recovering after pushing herself through physical therapy at a rate faster than (y/n) had ever seen in anyone before.  She was more amazed than surprised.  She would never underestimate that young woman’s abilities.
Toge was just starting to use his voice again, despite all of his friends telling him to just keep his mouth shut even if he was speaking in onigiri ingredients.  His sore throat still made his words sound choked and raspy, but he communicated with his friends nonetheless.
There were many other sorcerers that had gotten hurt that night, but just as her friends had, they were recovering, physically and mentally, from that horrible night.
Today the sun was shining.  It was still a chilly January day, but something about the clear skies drew (y/n) to linger on the steps of the main building.  She studied them beneath her boots.  Now that they were clear of snow, it looked as though a different color of stone was selected for their redesign.  Not too different, it was still a light brown, almost like sand, but different enough that the longer she stared at them, the more she could pick out the other differences between these and the old ones.  
“Ditching lessons?” 
Her eyes drag slowly away from the stone steps to see Gojo Satoru scaling them towards her.  His long legs had him next to her in a matter of seconds.  Truthfully, Shoko had said she needed a longer smoke break than usual today- which was only unusual because ever since christmas, she’d been taking longer smoke breaks, she’d only just mentioned it today.
“Not really.  Maybe” (y/n) replied indecisively.
“I’m still a teacher you know,” Gojo laughs at her honesty.  “I could get you in trouble~” 
The grin on his face tells her that there was absolutely no bite to his bark.  He just liked to pretend to be an adult sometimes.  (y/n) gives him a half hearted smile in amusement.  His grin weakens at the way hers drops as soon as she stares down at the stairs again.
He already knows what’s on her mind.  He was a better teacher than even he gave himself credit for.
“So he told you about Africa, huh?” 
Her head shoots back up, brows furrowed in a sad expression as she frowns at him.  
Yeah, he told me about Africa, she thinks, bitterly, even the thought making her mouth go sour.  She gnaws at the inside of her cheek roughly.
“I know you’re close.  I’m sorry that it’s happening,” Gojo sighs.  He stuffs his hands into his pockets.  “Kid’s got real potential.  He might even be stronger than me,” 
Just like his grin, his smirk speaks volumes.  (y/n’s) not sure if he really believes that, but she can tell he believes in Yuuta.
“Special Grade Sorcerers aren’t what they used to be, huh?” He asks, and she’s not sure if it’s rhetorical, so she just shrugs her shoulders, and directs her gaze downwards again.
Her throat burns.  Was that tears? 
“It won’t just be Africa,” Gojo says, slowly, like he’s trying to be careful.  She’s never known him to tread lightly.  He must really worry about her feelings.  She wonders why.  “Once he’s mastered his techniques, the geezers are gonna throw him at every curse they can sniff out” 
“I know” 
Her voice is small, but it holds enough certainty for Gojo to understand that she doesn’t need to be told what Yuuta’s future has in store.
“So,” Gojo takes a different tone as he kicks the toe of his shoe into a step.  “You’re not bothered that he’s a young widow, hm?” 
(y/n’s) face contorts into something strange and confused as she looks at him again.  She could almost laugh, if she wasn’t so disturbed by her teacher prying into her personal life.  She could tell him to buzz off, but it’d make no difference.  He’d probably just pester Shoko for the details and that would be even more embarrassing.
“I don’t even know what to-” 
“He cares about you a lot too,” Gojo says before she can finish.  (y/n’s) features relax as her eyes widen a little.  He looks out into the courtyard as if something interesting was happening over there.  “But Africa will be good for him.  And he’ll be back soon enough.  I’ll try ‘n pull some strings to have him visit, or something” 
Her impulse to say something snarky and get him to move on from the topic disappears.  Instead, she gives him a small nod, before tucking her cold fingers into the pockets of her coat.
“That would be nice,” She tells him, quietly, but surely.  “Thank you” 
Gojo grins from ear to ear as he turns back to his.  She has a feeling that under the white bandages, he’s winking dramatically.
He leaves without another word, leaving (y/n) a little bewildered by the sudden exit.  But then she sees another figure ascending the steps, and suddenly the cold isn’t the only thing making her cheeks pink.
Yuuta gives her the same smile he always does when he crosses her path.  Whether in passing or when he’s meeting up with her to hang out, his lips curl into the warmest smile she’s ever seen.  Even as clouds creep across the sky and snow begins to fall, she starts to feel toasty in her hat and coat.
She lies and tells him she has a few minutes to spare even though she’s been gone from the infirmary for a good twenty minutes now.  As they take a short walk around campus, her mood lightens up.  
They don’t talk about Africa.  Only good things.  A funny meme she’d seen, how Toge will be by the infirmary later because he refuses to keep his mouth shut to heal properly.  Maybe that wasn’t so much of a good thing, but Yuuta is laughing as he tells her about the pile of bloodied tissues accumulated at Toge’s desk.  Despite the twinge of guilt for laughing at their friend’s discomfort, she can’t help it.  Yuuta’s happiness is infectious.
This must be what swooning feels like, she thinks as she stares up at him while he tells her about his day.  It’s a silly story, maybe even kind of boring, but she hangs onto every word with eager anticipation at what he would share next.  He could read her the goddamn newspaper and she’d sit there with her head in her hands and give him her undivided attention.  Yeah, this is probably swooning.
“When do you have to be back?” Yuuta cuts off his rambling about training when he realizes they’ve been walking for some time now.
“Oh,” (y/n) shrugs sheepishly.  “Probably ten minutes ago” 
His eyes widen and he stops in his tracks, and before he even speaks she knows he’s about to apologize for taking up her time, so with a small laugh she shakes her head at him before he says a thing.
“Don’t worry about it,” She says, urging him to keep walking with her.  “Shoko needed some extra time today.  I don’t mind if I’m a little late” 
“You’re sure?” He double checks, because he doesn’t like being responsible for getting her behind schedule.  Nonetheless, he catches up to her as she keeps walking along the path.
Little does he know, if he asked her to ditch the rest of the day with him, she would take him by the hand and sprint off campus.
“Positive” (y/n) replies.
They continue to walk in the snow and talk about anything but Africa.  An unspoken agreement that it could wait.
[ oh darling, it’s alarming, to think of us apart ]
Eventually, they have to talk about Africa.
It comes up the morning Yuuta leaves. 
It’s early enough in the morning that it’s still dark.  Panda had helped him load his bags into Ijichi’s car, before giving him a quick goodbye so he could go back to bed.  Maki and Toge lingered a little longer, even in their pajamas.  But at some point Maki cursed about how early it was, gave her new friend a friendly- but not light- punch to the shoulder, and returned inside.
Toge and (y/n) were equally quiet, although for their different reasons.  Eventually Yuuta couldn’t fill the silence anymore, and they were out of time to stall.
To his surprise, Toge gave him a quick hug.  Just enough to give him a kind pat on the back and an eager ‘salmon!’ certainly wishing him luck on his big assignment.  Yuuta thanked him with a grin, proud to understand what he really meant.
Then he turned to (y/n), who’d barely moved an inch since sleepily walking out here.  He’d insisted to everyone last night that they could say their goodbyes then, but she’d stood her ground that she’d see him off today.  The others agreed.
Her arms were wrapped firmly around herself, and the smile on her face was sad when his eyes met hers.  Even when she tried to brighten up, to properly display her pride in him, she just couldn’t quite do it.
Toge watched as they stared at each other for a moment, neither one of them finding anything to say.  For a minute he thought it might be awkward, and he figured he should probably leave now.  
It only took Yuuta one step forward, his arms barely outstretched, before (y/n’s) finding the energy to leap towards him, crashing into him.  Her arms are thrown around his neck as she hugs him tightly.  As she tucks her chin against his shoulder she’s willing herself not to cry, because she knows it would make him feel bad, and that wouldn’t be fair.  Yuuta’s surprise has him hesitating for a second before he’s hugging her back, hoping to hold on just as securely as she’d latched onto him.
“Text a lot,” When she’s certain her voice won’t crack, (y/n) finally speaks.  “And call, too” 
Yuuta chuckles.  His eyes close as he rests his cheek against her head.  She’s never hugged him before, but he’s decided from this one that she’s the best hugger in the world.
“The time difference is-” 
“I don’t care” She mutters, and it’s punctuated with her arms squeezing around him a little tighter.
He returns the affection.
“Okay” He murmurs.
When they have to part, she lets out a shaky breath, and plasters on the widest smile she can.  She hopes he can see the tears in her eyes.  He does.
He gives her and Toge a wave before finally opening the door to the backseat.  He doesn’t say goodbye.  Instead he settles for, “See you later” 
(y/n) manages a little wave back.  It’s not until the car pulls away and is out of sight before a tear falls.  She’s quick to wipe it away.
Her and the cursed speech user walk back towards the main building together.  He gives her a sympathetic look.  She gives him a weak smile.
“Yeah, I know,” She sighs, drying her eyes once more and taking a deep breath in the hopes of not crying again.
He smiles back, but unlike hers, it’s bright, and cheeky.  He draws a heart in the air with his fingers.  She wants to roll her eyes, but she lets out a watery laugh at the action, and she knows her face is heating up with evidence of the truth.
“Something like that” She mumbles.  They don’t say anything else before parting ways to go back to their rooms.
By the time she collapses back in bed, she’s too awake to think about sleeping a little longer before her lesson with Shoko.  Pulling out her phone for a source of entertainment, she finds she already has a notification at this ungodly hour.
[yuuta] : try not to miss me too much :) i’ll be back before you know it
Tucking the blankets up to her chin, (y/n) settles into bed with a small smile.  Yuuta wasn’t often cheeky.  And when he was, it was always followed by a nervous laugh and bright pink cheeks.  Behind the shield of his phone he clearly has a leap in confidence.  She even laughs a little as she types back her response.
[ you and me, always, forever ]
Yuuta had some mixed feelings about going to Africa.
On the one hand, he was ecstatic.  He had finally climbed the ranks in this new life that he thinks could make everything make sense.  He felt a new sense of responsibility along with his new sense of self, and he knows that this debut of his in Africa was the next big step forwards.  He’d prove himself, he’d push himself, and he’d come home stronger than before.  He’d make his friends, and his teachers, proud of taking a chance on him.
On the other hand, his new purpose, this new sense of self that he was still discovering, felt so much more worth exploring when she was there too.  Yuuta wasn’t as naive as some may make him out to be.  He knew what love felt like.  He recognized that the ticklish feeling in his chest when she laughed, he was familiar with the buzz in his fingertips when she walked too close and her hand brushed over his.  He knows when he’s lying awake at night and she’s the one who crosses his mind that it’s no coincidence.
Yuuta knows that his heart holds much more than platonic regards for one (y/n) (y/l/n).  He knows that he adores her.  He knows that his heart longs for her in a way that couldn’t possibly be platonic.  The fact that they’ll have to be apart for some time makes him sad.  It makes him lonely.
Even now, after seeing her twenty minutes ago when they said their goodbyes, he already missed her.  He couldn’t help but text her right away, the desperation for keeping in contact pumping through him like ice, making him feel wide awake even at five in the morning.  The thought of losing touch over the next few months of him being away makes him sweat.  
He’d have to make sure to keep in touch, he makes a mental plan to always text her first thing in the morning, and last thing before he goes to sleep.  That way, even if he got busy throughout his day, he’d always have the time for her.  He wanted her to know that he’d always make the time for her.
Yuuta’s heart is racing, the adrenaline a toxic mix of excitement and anxiety.  Had he eaten a proper meal this morning he might’ve thrown up.
Just as he’s contemplating rolling down the window for some fresh air, his phone pings.
[(y/n/n)]: i take it you miss me already, yuuta?
It’s a silly little emoji, but he swears she’s sent him her heart in digital form and it leaps right from the screen and into his open palms.  He's smiling at the screen and responding with a reaction image he’d snagged from Toge just a few days ago.
[ you and me, always, forever ]
Gojo follows through on his promise.  Yuuta comes back to Jujutsu Tech for a small break after two months in Africa.
He gets to campus earlier than expected, surprising his classmates in the middle of a lesson.  Luckily today the lesson was rating the different flavors of kikufuku from a new shop Gojo had found, so he hadn’t interrupted anything too pressing.
It’s shortly after his early arrival that he asks the question that his friends think they should have placed money on him asking.  Maki mutters something to Toge about how she would’ve won had they done so.
“Where’s (y/n)?” 
While he stares at them with a dumbfounded expression, his friends laugh.  Loud cackling that’s intended to make him feel embarrassed, but he’s more confused than anything.  Even Gojo joins in once he’s not distracted by his leftover treats and Panda merrily tells their teacher that Yuuta’s already sick of them.
“That’s not it!” The poor boy puts his hands up in mock defense as he jumps to explain himself.  “I just want to tell her I’m back-” 
“She’s in the infirmary, genius” Maki crosses her arms, but her displeased attitude crumbles when a smirk tugs on her lips.  Yuuta forces a smile, but it’s awkward.  His nervous energy begins to shine through his excitement about returning home.
It’s not long after this that he’s delivering a string of excuses before darting out of the classroom and running to the infirmary.  Was it a little embarrassing to race towards her like this? Yeah, but there was barely anyone on campus right now anyways, so no one had to know just how eager he was to see her again.
Even though every bone in his body was practically vibrating by the time he made it there.
He peers through the small windows on the heavy doors outside the hospital classroom, making sure it was safe to enter before he barged in.  As soon as he looks inside he sees Shoko leaning against the cabinets.  (y/n) was standing in front of her, her back to the door, but she was easily recognizable to him.  Before he can knock to make himself known, Shoko catches him in her line of sight, and gives him an uncharacteristically wide grin.
In fact it’s so unusual on her face, that (y/n) perks up in the midst of whatever conversation they were having, curious to see what could've caught her interest so much.
Okkotsu Yuuta was not at all what she might have expected.
He gets to watch her light up in real time.  He hears her excitedly squealing from the other side of the door.  And somehow, even though it’s been a whole two months since he’s seen her, the ten seconds it takes for her to fly through the doors and into his arms seems to take too long.
She crashes into him so hard he stumbles to balance his footing.  She’s laughing and bouncing and rambling on, ‘I’m so happy you’re here! You’re early! I would’ve helped you with your things! Have you settled in? Have you eaten? Should we go get some food? I’ll order food! And we can stay in!’ She’s talking so fast that he catches about half of what she’s saying.  He only chuckles, not having the heart to tell her he can barely understand her.
Her arms squeeze tight around his neck before she finally lets him go.  With twinkling eyes and a smile so wide it must be sore on her cheeks, Yuuta’s slowly melting heart completely dissolves.
“Your hair’s different” She tilts her head at him while she admires the way his slightly longer hair is styled around his face.  She lets her curiosity get the best of her, reaching a hand out to gently push a strand away from his forehead.  
Yuuta hadn’t really given any thought to his hair.  He can’t remember when exactly it had gotten too long, when he’d parted it differently so it wasn’t a hindrance, but now he’s second guessing the change in style as if that change had been a conscious choice.
“Bad different?” 
There’s a small giggle in the back of her throat that she can’t help when his brows furrow at her.  He’s so cute, she thinks her heart could melt right here.
She shakes her head at him in a small motion.
“No,” She assured him.  “Good different” 
A small smile tugs at the corners of his lips, a proud little smile, like he’d gotten her to admit her deepest, most well kept secret.
“Good different?” He repeats, his voice dripping with mirth.
She rolls her eyes and crinkles her nose, but there’s no hiding the warmth in her cheeks and the way her dimples show when she smiles, even when she ducks her head from him.
“Shut up, Yuuta,” She pushes his shoulder but just as quickly grabs him by the elbow.  “Now come on! The day’s almost over already and we have so much we need to catch up on!” 
She forgets her bag in the infirmary as they wander campus together for a while, making pitstops to get him unpacked for his short visit and to snack up before they make their simple plans for the evening.  Conversation never ceases, even when she’s trying to place a takeout order over the phone, she finds herself remembering various little stories and jokes that she’d tucked away in her memory to share with him.  
There’s been a change in him.  It wasn’t just the training that treated him well with lean muscle, it wasn’t just the haircut, or the way he’d learned to wield his katana like it was an extension of him.  It was confidence.  It was happiness.  He didn’t stutter over his words nearly as often.  When he spoke he was sure of the things he said.  He would still blush when she got close enough or whispered something exceptionally sweet to him, but he was better at holding eye contact, and grew quite comfortable with reciprocating the small affections.  Maybe that was just it, he was finally comfortable here, and with himself.
Time flies faster than it had when they were apart.  The afternoon turns to evening which turns to the middle of the night.  They’re still sitting on the common room couch, side by side, lost in their own little world as a forgotten movie plays in the background.  Some of it had been watched when they’d eaten, but the takeout boxes on the coffee table are empty now.  Yuuta’s yawning and (y/n’s) eyelids are heavy as she tries to keep her attention on him while he tells a story, his voice getting lower and his words coming out slower the later it gets.  It’s not until he’s slumping into the uncomfortable cushions of the old couch that they even think to check the time.
When they do decide they’ve been up for too long, they make their way sneakily back to their rooms, hoping to remain as silent as possible.  But anyone who was up at this hour would hear their hushed laughter and aggressive shushing.  Yuuta bids her goodnight with the promise of taking everyone out for breakfast in the morning, but before he drops her off at her door, they share one more embrace.
She means to keep it quick, she really does.  She knows he’s tired, and maybe a little annoyed with all of the affection today, but she was so happy to have him back that she couldn’t help but want to keep him close forever.
Yuuta doesn’t seem annoyed in the slightest.  He hugs her back tightly, and makes no move to let her go anytime soon, so she doesn’t, either.  They stand that way at her door for an unknown amount of time, each waiting for the other to pull away first.
It takes some time, but eventually she shuffles out of his hold and gives him a bashful little smile followed by, “I’m really glad you’re home, Yuuta” 
The tension lays itself on thick, making sure to smother Yuuta until the back of his neck feels hot and his heart beats so hard in his chest he’s certain she’s going to notice and tease him for it.
“Me too” He manages to murmur back.  
He’s lucky he’s able to return her sweet ‘goodnight!’ too, because his throat is tightening on itself and he thinks he could start choking just standing there.
When he drags himself back to his own room and his heart calms down- just a little bit- Yuuta decides he’s going to have to do something about that tension before it kills him.
[ you and me, always, forever ]
“This is getting ridiculous,” Maki declares before kicking open the classroom door.  Her two friends follow in behind her.  “It’s actually going to make me sick.  I think we should just say something already” 
“Don’t kick doors down Maki” Panda sighs, but his warning goes ignored.
“Salmon,” Toge shrugs his shoulders, raising his hands to be palms up, as though indicating what else is there to do?
“Well for starters, we get the idiots to talk to each other,” Maki states, picking up the notebook off her usual desk.  
It was the whole reason they came back to class so late in the day, seeing as this particular notebook had the notes from their lesson earlier.  It was important she made the trip back for it before they started their study session.  She did take the better notes of the three of them.
“Apparently all their time together isn’t getting anywhere,” She huffs.  “I swear, all he does is talk about her.  He’s bound to have something good enough to confess already, right?” 
Toge giggles into his collar.
“Ease up a bit, they’ll come around to it when they’re ready, won’t they?” Panda tries to be the voice of reason.  
There’s a pause for silence.  And then Toge and Maki are cackling so hard they have to hold their stomachs to relieve the twisting knots of their muscles.
“It’s been months!” Maki hollers through her mania.
“Salmon!” 
“I mean, how much more of this can you guys take?” She doesn’t give them the time to answer her question.  “I can’t stand listening to him ramble on and on about her.  Did you know the one phone call I got, he talked about her the whole time?” 
“You’ve mentioned” Panda mumbles, awkwardly rubbing the back of his head.
“Tuna tuna” Toge agreed, before making a crude motion with his hands that had Maki bursting into laughter again.
Maki rolls her eyes, before grabbing her missing notebook from her desk and stuffing it into her backpack.  She’d been holding back on intervening on these two for months now.  At first, she didn’t care enough.  If (y/n) and Yuuta wanted to dance around each other like children with crushes then that was their business.  But now the romantic tension was so thick it choked her up to be in a room with them.  The lingering stares, the flirty giggles, the blushing- gah- she couldn’t stand it.
Don’t get her wrong, she didn’t hate love, and she didn’t hate either of them for being in love.  She hated wimps.  And these two were being the wimpiest people she’s ever seen for not fessing up already.
Also, wasn’t she just being a good friend for getting two dumbasses in love to admit they’re in love with each other? She did want them to be together after all, they were good for each other.
“I think it’s sweet that he loves her so much!” Panda argues.  “I don’t mind listening to it.  (y/n’s) really nice.  They deserve each other” 
“Oh, yeah, they deserve each other,” Maki agrees but her tone drips with something hostile.  “No shit, do you not see how much she stares at him?” 
Toge’s snickering gets louder.  It wasn’t often there was gossip among the small group, there wasn’t exactly time for it.  But this was rather entertaining, and watching two of his friends trip over themselves with how hard they’d been crushing on each other had been the cherry on top.
“Well, yeah,” Panda finally lets out a small laugh.  “Actually, the other day I was talking to her, and I don’t think she heard a word I said,” He chuckles as he recalls the way her eyes glazed over and a dopey little smile took over her face.  “I don’t know how he hasn’t noticed it” 
“Salmon” Toge scoffs.
“Yeah, he’s more oblivious than she is” Maki agrees.
“But I don’t think we should do anything about it” Panda tries to reason.
“They’re never going to make a move if we don’t say something,” Maki huffs.  “Can’t they just get it over with already? How hard is a confession anyways?” 
“Like you’ve ever confessed to anyone” Panda throws back at her with a proud grin.
Toge makes a sound of delight to see the gossiping turning into something much more interesting.
Maki glares at the both of them before snarling.
“That’s it!” She declares, throwing her bag over her shoulder.  “I’m going to go tell them right now.  Whoever I find first is going to hear great news today!” 
“Maki don’t!” Panda hollers, marching after her out the door.  “It’s not our place! That’s an invasion of privacy!” 
Toge’s enthusiastic babbling of rice ball ingredients follows them out into the hall, eager to see where this was going to go.
The classroom door slides shut behind him, and the sounds of their heavy, quick footsteps drones on until they’re too far to be heard.  It’s not until the room is completely silent that a small exhale of relief is heard, under the large desk that Gojo pretended to use during his lessons.
“I think we’re in the clear” Yuuta whispers, once he’s absolutely certain that no one is left in the room.
He drops his hand from over (y/n’s) mouth, where she’s been gnawing on her bottom lip for the last six minutes in fear that their classmates were going to notice them hiding under there.
“Really?” She asks in a teasing tone of voice.  “Because it sounds like they’re looking for us” 
Yuuta huffs in defeat, a look on his face that completely contrasts her own.  (y/n’s) brightened, grinning from ear to ear and giggling under her breath.  
They’re squished into the small space so when she giggles he can feel her breath fanning over his neck, and even though he wants to grab her by the shoulders and make her come back to reality- which is that their friends are on a rampage right now to get them to confess to each other, something they’d just done minutes before they’d stormed into this very classroom- but he can’t.  He takes one look at her, with her starry eyes and cute smile and he accepts whatever fate has in store for him.
(y/n) had surprised him here, happily announcing she wrapped up her lessons early so that they could spend the afternoon together.  He only had a few days left until he’d be shipped off to Africa again, so she’d worked diligently today to be sure she could give him every spare minute of her free time.  Somehow they’d wound up in the classroom alone.  
One minute Yuuta’s going on about how excited he was to hang out with her and the next thing he knows he’s accidentally letting it slip that he’d like to have her all to himself all the time.  He realized instantly that he’d said something a little too romantically charged because suddenly she’s staring up at him with those damn wide eyes and a smile full of secrets.
He must’ve said something right though, because one thing led to another and she had an iron grip on his collar while her strawberry gloss smeared all over his mouth.
(y/n) smirks now as she reaches her thumb up to his lips now, wiping away a subtle speck of pink glitter that had been left behind there.  Her face heats up as she recalls how carried away she’d gotten just minutes ago.  Until their friends showed up and nearly caught them in the act.  
Had Maki kicked down that door just a minute earlier, they surely would’ve been caught in their scrambling.  More specifically, they would’ve caught the awkward way Yuuta had lifted (y/n) off the desk he’d just set her on, only to hustle them both under the desk, the only half-decent hiding place in this whole room.
“You’re kidding,” She’d mumbled when he drew his knees to his chest and beckoned her to duck under with him.  She crowds into the space, but not without scolding him.  “They’re definitely going to-” He covers her mouth with his large palm, effectively quieting her, just as the door slams open.
Now she knows they should be scrambling out of here, before they were eventually caught- again- but she stays put in the tiny space where their legs are sore and cramped together.
“So you talk about me to all your friends, hm?” She muses, leaning in impossibly closer to give him her best shit eating grin.  It easily has Yuuta blushing from his neck to his ears as he turns his head to relieve himself from the heavy eye contact.
“Yeah yeah,” He mumbles, tugging at his collar in an attempt to soothe the heat.  Just as the embarrassment settles in, he whips his head back to meet her stare with a wild look in his eye that actually catches her off guard.  “But you’ve been staring at me!” He says.
She opens her mouth to defend herself, but the proof had been hollering in this very room just moments ago during Maki’s fit.  Panda had happily supplied the damn evidence.
So she shuts her mouth, and now Yuuta’s beaming at her with victorious pride.  
“So it’s true!?” He asks excitedly.
“You already know that, jerk,” She rolls her eyes at him, but it’s filled with affection.  “You’re the one who’s in love with me!” She says with a jab to his chest.
Yuuta catches her hand with his before she can pull it away, making her pleased little grin fall to something softer.  He’s able to watch in real time as her eyelashes flutter when her glance darts down to his lips, and when she looks up at him again, it’s with color in her cheeks and a sweetness in her gaze that has him turning to putty.
What was meant to be a half-hearted jest based on something Panda had said that she wasn’t exactly meant to hear now hangs in the air between them so heavy it feels like gravity grows in strength.  Her heart is pounding in her chest.  Her hand feels hot in his.  And now she sits with baited breath and wide eyes as she waits for him to say something.
Yuuta’s smiling, his free hand coming up to the nape of her neck, sweeping her hair away before pulling her closer.  She tilts her head towards him, but he stops just before their lips could graze over one another.
“You love me too?” He whispers.
He phrases it like a question, but he already knows it to be true.  He just wants to hear her say it.
Her lips quirk into a sweet smile as her eyes flicker between his, lashes heavy, pupils blown wide in her irises.  She’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, and the thought of getting to love her and be loved by her has his heart racing so fast he’s almost forgetting that he’s asked her a question because all he wants is to kiss her.
“Of course I do,” She murmurs, her soft lips ghosting over his, eager to feel them against hers again.  “Think I’ve always loved you, Yuuta,” She adds in a quieter voice.  A carefully protected deep adoration in her heart, now bestowed upon his.  “Think it’s always been you and me” She hums softly, taken away by the warmth in her chest and the butterflies in her tummy.
She could sit here and whisper sweet things to him for hours, maybe even forever.
His thumb strokes under her jaw in a gentle motion, caressing the junction at her jawline and neck.  He looks radiant, smiling down at her like nothing’s ever made him so happy.  This spurs her into wanting to say more sweet things, but before she gets the chance, he’s slanting his lips over hers.
She melts into him in every sense of the word.  Her free hand reaches for his shoulder, before sliding around his neck so she could lean into him further.  The small space they’re still hiding in only shrinks as she tries to get closer to him.  Both pairs of their legs are too long to keep bent under the desk, so she sticks one leg out, accidentally kicking the chair in front of them but she pays it no mind.  She just focuses on getting closer to him, hooking her other leg underneath herself to give her better leverage and a tiny bit more space to scoot closer.
Her hands are on his collar again as soon as he grabs her by the hips.  He gives them a gentle squeeze and she giggles softly into his mouth, breaking their kiss for only a moment.  They share wide smiles and lovesick eyes before leaning into each other again and sealing their lips in a heated and much more passionate kiss.
They don’t think at all about the noise of the chair clattering across the floor or the distinct sound of their giggling as they get swept away with one another.  In fact they completely forget that they’re only in this position because they’d been trying to keep hidden.  Both too consumed with memorizing the feeling of each other’s lips.  
It’s a sweet moment, really, the first time young lovers get to explore the way the other kisses.  Gently, with timid, inexperienced brushes.  Or hungrily, with eager, heated desire.  Taking their time was a luxury they’d thought they could finally afford.
But this time when the door opens it’s with stealth.  It slides in silence, and the steps that creep in are also with slow precision, so as not to make even a creak in the floorboards.
All that can be seen by the three intruders are the three legs jutting out from under the desk.  A familiar pair of Converse and one familiar Mary Jane with a heart shaped buckle kicking gently about on the floorboards, rocking with delight.
The hushed sound of lips smacking only ceased when there was a giggle, one of them or both of them, murmuring between kisses and giggles like a pair of school children.
There’s a few things that are audible, murmurs of ‘I love you so much’ or ‘you’re so pretty’ repeated between them like mantras.  This continues for a minute until one of the three takes a heavier step than he means to with his paw, and the room goes completely silent- save for the lewd ‘smack!’ of a pair of lips seizing upon hearing the tell-tale sign of a lurker.
Maki and Toge glare back at Panda, who sheepishly grins and shrugs his shoulders.
(y/n) and Yuuta stare at each other in horrified shock.  They don’t get the chance to come up with a plan of attack before someone is on top of the desk with a squeak of sneakers.  And then Toge is bending over the surface, staring wide eyes at the two in a rather compromising position- (y/n’s) leg is thrown over Yuuta’s lap and being kept there by a firm hand, her hands are still balled up in his unbuttoned collar, their lips are thoroughly swollen she’s effectively transferred most of her lip gloss onto his mouth, and chin and neck- there’s nothing innocent about them.  Toge stares between them both before he lets out a whistle, giggling as he hops off the desk again.
Yuuta winces as he quickly releases his grip on (y/n’s) leg so they can both scramble out from under the desk and up to their feet.  It’s ungraceful, uncoordinated as they awkwardly untangle to clamber upwards.  Yuuta hits his head on the hard oak loud enough that they both wince, (y/n) quickly inspecting the instant bump that forms at the occiput of his skull.
“No way!” Maki breaks the tension first, her jaw hanging open as she grins in amusement at having caught the two of them here.  “You were hiding out in here the whole time!?”
“Tuna!” Toge shoves his finger in their direction in accusation.
“Kissing!” Panda gasps, his paws over his face.
“Why didn’t you just say something,” Maki huffed.  “Walked around for ten minutes for no reason.  Waste of my time” She grumbles as she crosses her arms.
“Uh, sorry” (y/n) said sheepishly.
“Yeah, sorry,” Yuuta pipes up.  “It was just… uh… awkward” 
“You’re awkward!” Maki barks back with a dismissive wave of her hand.  “Jeez, glad you got it over with finally” She bids them her blessing with rough words before spinning around and leaving the room without saying anything else.
Panda gives them a bright smile and nod of his head, his own friendly way of telling them he was happy for them.
“Hope you’re happy” He tells them out of the kindness of his soul before excusing himself as well.
“Salmon!” Toge agrees with a grin and friendly wave before also leaving.
All the lurking around they’d done, only to give them space as soon as they caught what they needed to.
The remaining pair turned to each other, gaping mouths turning into shy smiles as they slowly burst into laughter together.  What was supposed to be a slow introduction of new feelings to explore had now been on display to pretty much everyone they knew.  Shyness began to wash away as there was no more use for it.  Yuuta reaches for his hand and (y/n’s) fingers intertwined with his as though they’d familiarized themselves there before.  She smiles as he uses her hand to pull her closer to him, until the toes of her shoes barely bump into his.
They don’t say anything, they don’t need to.  (y/n) knows what he means when he cradles her face in his palm and smiles down at her.  He knows what she means when her nose crinkles and her free hand reaches to hold onto his collar once more.  Their ‘i love yous’ had almost always been silent, and they would forever understand it in its unspoken form.
__
this is for @staygoldsquatchling02​ for being excited about my rotting brain full of yuuta fluff a/n: y’all i got soo carried away with this-
xoxo ~ jordie
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thewritersaddictions · 1 year ago
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Day Twenty-Nine: Karl Heisenberg + BreathPlay
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You were constantly reaching out for Karl's hand. Enjoying the rough feeling of his cussed-covered fingers against your much softer hands.
Karl didn't seem to mind either after the initial shock that someone was touching him. Wantingly touching. You walked hand in hand to meet with the family and sat side by side. Pressed into his side, but continuously your fingers were interlocked.
Hand in hand when you walked around in town, and as much as Karl hated the idea of being around less intelligent people than him. He allowed you to drag him down to the middle of town and walk around the shops before returning to the factory after a long day out.
That was not the only time you wished that you could hold his touch. You yearned for a hand to run smoothly down your back and sometimes rest at the bottom of your spine. You longed for the soft touch of his rough hand.
You are the exact opposite of Karl. You yearn for the touch of another, and Karl yearns to not be touched. Karl is okay with his lonely life before you came along, and he's just as content with living it how it is now.
Yes, you are confused because when you look at Karl, you don't see just a friend, someone to talk to when the nights are quiet, and the factory is slow. No, Karl is something else for you. A bright light at the end of the tunnel. He's what you yearn for.
So when the touch you yearn for splits and turns into a need that you have to fill, something twists within your mind. You start to stare off more. Staring at Karl's hands as he works on bits of metal together, or how he tightness things together on a soldat.
The one that as you biting your tongue and squeezing your thigh together is when his hands stretch out, his metal hammer flying into his hand. It's attractive all on its own. The bludge of his veins, the girth of his fingers, it all has you in a haze.
"Y/n? Are you even paying attention to what I'm talking about?" Karl's booming voice pulls you from your naughty thoughts of his hands. "Huh." You say a bit too loud, and he rolls his eyes, "Earth to Y/n, what's got you being a space cadet today?" He asks, intrigued by your glazed-over eyes and gap mouth.
Karl has never seen you like this, and he's seen you in many ways. Blood smeared across your cheeks. A mixture of your own and others, your shirt half tore due to lycans desperately in need of stitches. Bare skin that makes his heart race every time he catches a glimpse. Y/n had been off, and Karl had taken notice. Take notice of how your gaze drifted from his face, down his arms, and then finally landed on his hands.
"I'm just… it's all fine." You say to Karl, trying to push away the fact that you not only got caught but also have no idea you were spacing out. His stare is deathly; you're an open book for him to read as much as he likes.
"No… I don't believe you. I think you were off dreaming…" You shake your head, trying to push him away from the right path he's already on. "Don't shake your head at me now, buttercup. Better if you just fess up to what you were thinkin' about." You feel like a deer in headlights. Wide-eyed and easily scared off.
The silence is unsettling, "Oh, buttercup, you want me to guess instead." Smirking up a storm, you think that's rather a good idea, and then it's a bad idea. But there's nothing else you can do. If you say the words, then it's all too real, but if he guesses it, then it means Karl already knows.
"I think…" He says, getting up from the side of the table, heavy boots on the ground beneath you. "you have been very naughty…" With each punch of the words that fall from his mouth, his hands graze up your back like you've always wished for. "thinkin' about me, and my hands." You breathe in quickly. If it's due to his touch or his words, you'll never know.
"I bet you've thought up a bunch of dirty things." He whispers into your ear. His voice was rough and scratchy. "I bet you would love it if I just wrapped my hand around your throat and kept you right on the edge all night long." You moan as you feel his hand reach the base of the back of your neck. "Let me just sink my fat cock into your tight pussy, hmm, squeeze your throat so you stars." You whimper as you clench your thighs tightly, willing the ache to go away.
Then just like that, Karl is gone, walking back over to his side of the table. You're left like a puppy following its owner. Shock is written all over your face. "Oh, what do you want more buttercup." He mutters as he walks off and towards the direction of the bedroom.
You follow like a lovesick puppy would.
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Completed on: 08/20/23
Posted on: 10/28/23
Kinktober 23- @lanad3lreyscokewhor3 @homelanderscumdump @hummusxx@chvnsdimple @vvitzvafflezvv @lokisivy @claud-blood0703 @iliketoreads-stuff @all-that-glitters-is-treasure@clearscissorsbonkgiant-blog @lxonix--ac @piecesofx @mortallyswimmingpainter @playwithfire99 @fucak @everythingneytiri @lovetheos @xxxxxoseungxoooo @durazopato @hotpead42069 @oddseabiscuit @capoda @witching-hour @viviwows @lover103 @alexlovesfiction @katiecat10 @electricfans @jianasmind @max-505 @powerbun21o @the-horny-simp @missy420-0 @jaq-dav @arescosplays
Resident Evil Master List // House Heisenberg Master List // Kinktober '23
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You belong with me | L.N.
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Lando Norris x driver!reader
Summary: Nothing is more painful than two people being scared of how much they love each other.
Warnings: angst, fluff, idiots in love <3
Word count: ~2.3K
^^ It‘s funny to look back at the past that had brought you into this situation. Which is being an F1 driver and helplessly in love with your best friend and racing partner.
Lando and you have been inseparable since your early karting days, in turn developing a strong bond over your shared love for the sport which grew more as you got to know each other better. You were both childish still, no matter the fact that you were nearing your mid 20‘s. But that was what you loved about you two as a pair. There was never judgment from the other and what one lacked the other filled perfectly.
Throughout the close friendship there were a few mishaps when the threshold of friendship had been overstepped but there was always a girlfriend or a boyfriend at the time holding you two restrained and loyal.
So naturally when you two finally became single at the same time and got signed into McLaren’s F1 team all you could think about was. This is it. Now is our time.
And as on queue Lando organized you a surprise. Just the two of you, middle of the starry summer’s night with the city lights below your feet. You were smiling so much that night, your cheeks had started to hurt, but how could you not smile when he was next to you, paying his whole attention to you and making you laugh.
You were sure that he was going to ask you out that night.
And then he didn’t’. It could not have been a more painful experience, but you kept up your smile even if your eyes had faded, no longer admiring the boy next to you, that was just too miserable.
Unrequited love was miserable.
Or so you had thought until about a month later when Lando brought in a girl for everyone to meet calling her his girlfriend.
Just then unrequited love became agonizing.
Your Lando was known for his cheerful disposition and infectious laughter. He was easily the happiest boy around! Well until the said girlfriend…
It was only a few weeks later that you noticed your friends’ colours fade.
About two months in the others started noticing and drilling you about it.
“What do you mean you don’t know? You two are best friends, you have to know what’s causing him so much stress lately” Carlos was making too many hand movements due to his own distress.
“I just don’t know, we don’t talk that much these days” you tucked your hair into your cap and stomped away from the Spaniard.
You didn’t want to admit it to Carlos or anyone else, but you and Lando weren’t the great friends you used to be.
You surely kept your distance since he got his girlfriend out of sheer respect to their relationship (and respect to your own mental health). Although it still seemed not enough for his girlfriend as on a few instances you caught her yelling at Lando in the cool offs to stop the friendship you shared.
To say the least that definitely put a wall between you two, but nevertheless it didn’t completely break your bond.
Now, nine months and one nasty breakup later the unrequited love feels excruciating.
A shadow has fallen over Lando’s already tainted personality. He was going through a painful breakup with his now ex-girlfriend. She had been a constant presence in his life for the past year, controlling his every move, every word and god forbid he didn’t get the right amount of points… Safe to say she was sucking life out of him as a ravenous vampire, though Lando was too blind to see that.
The breakup had taken a toll on Lando, leaving him almost senseless now that he was out of her hold, and it showed in his performance on the track. During the qualifying session for the upcoming race, he couldn't find his usual rhythm and ended up with a DNF after driving himself into a wall.
As he stepped out of his car, disappointment weighed heavily on him. Lando felt like he was losing everything now and the sadness from his failures compounded his frustration.
You had been there for Lando throughout the tumultuous relationship, supporting him in all the little ways you could, checking in before and after races and offering a listening ear whenever you could see him about to reach his limits.
But on this particular day, you could no longer listen to him whining about her, you have reached a breaking point. You couldn’t stand by and watch the man you cared for so deeply be consumed by a toxic woman who had done nothing but break him piece by piece for the past year.
"If I was better, she would still be with me." You heard Lando mumble as he laid on the sofa emotionless.
"LANDO STOP! You must be insane to be saying those things. How can you say that you're not enough? She was the one who didn't care about you, who was never here to support you. Lando, it's her who didn't deserve you, not the other way around!" you snapped, voice filled with tears.
"You don't get it. If I was enough, wouldn't there be girls who like me? Because not one of my girlfriends have actually liked me or, god forbid, loved me." Lando was drowning in self-doubt and it was suffocating you to the point where your heart physically ached seeing him so beat up.
"Can't you see why that is? Maybe you don't belong with any of those girls? Lando, maybe you belong with someone who loves you through your highs and lows, someone who can't bear to see you sad, someone who lets you cry into their shoulder in the middle of the night, and, most importantly, someone who can't stand watching you break yourself over some girl," frustration evident in your trembling voice muddled Lando.
"What are you trying to say, Y/n?"
You hesitated, heart racing, as you contemplated revealing your true feelings. "All this time, Lando, and you still can't see it."
Lando was bewildered, not comprehending your cryptic words. "See what?"
You were burning with passion, on the brink of confessing your feelings, but ultimately bit your tongue. You were praying for him, but he could not understand and you believed he never would and to express the delicate feelings right now seemed futile.
"Nothing," you replied, shaking your head to rid of the emotions taking over your rational brain, and left the room to preserve your patched up heart.
As you retreated, a storm of emotions raged within. You couldn't help but wonder if there would ever come a day when Lando would realize the truth you had left unsaid.
Your words left Lando conflicted and he hated it.
You were someone he could always count on to understand. Hell he never needed to read you, you were like a road he had taken day after day, he knew you so well, he could navigate without his senses.
Lando found himself seeking friendly counsel from Carlos, as he was still perplexed by your reaction and couldn't fathom why you had gotten so upset with him.
"I don't understand why she's so mad at me?! Can you believe it, she was even crying. I'm the one that got dumped, and she's pissed at me for picking the wrong girl?!" Lando vented pulling at his hair, frustration lacing his voice.
Carlos regarded him thoughtfully before posing a question that made Lando pause and reflect. "Lando, let me ask you this. If Y/n was dating a guy who constantly made her doubt herself and feel like shit, how would you feel?"
Lando’s response was interlaced with confusion, "Why the hell would she even date someone like that?"
"So to say you'd be pissed as well?" Carlos continued.
Lando struggled to find words to counter Carlos's argument. He had a point, and Lando was beginning to see things from a different perspective. "But I..."
Carlos interrupted him with a knowing smirk forming on his face, "You what?"
Lando thought about it, connecting the dots between his protective feelings for you and the turmoil he had experienced during his recent relationship. Carlos decided to push him closer to an epiphany.
"When you like someone, you don't want to see them hurting, but it's different to feel the pain of the other person. That's closer to-"
"Love," Lando finished, realization dawning. He abruptly grabbed his jacket and rushed out the door with a clear destination in mind.
It was time for Lando to confront the truth he had been avoiding, and perhaps, in the process, he might finally get what he had always wanted. You and love.
Everything was suddenly falling into place for Lando. He began to understand why you had never wanted to hang out whenever he got into a relationship, why you cried when he cried, why you sacrificed your sleep just to listen to him rant about the terrible things his ex had done, and crack jokes to make him smile. It all made sense, and he couldn't believe he hadn't seen it before.
Deep down, he had always known that the girls he dated were just placeholders, a way to distract himself from the perfect girl he felt undeserving of his whole life.
He had a brilliant idea last year when you both secured your McLaren positions. He planned a whole midnight drive and stargazing, which he knew you loved (that also prompted him to learn constellations for weeks before the special day, only to impress you). He wanted to ask you to be his and make it magical, but ultimately chickened out.
When the next day came around he could not face you and instead of spending the last few days before training with you he headed to a bar where he met his now ex. She was pretty and showed so much interest in him he could not not get hooked.
In that moment of absolute weakness Lando decided that having a girlfriend would solve the problem of loving his best friend and potentially ruining the friendship.
He could not have been more wrong. The relationship was an absolute hellhole, filled with insecurities and so many fights that he could no longer see himself as he looked in the mirror. Still no matter how bad his life got, he felt he deserved the purgatory for letting you slip through his fingers when he just had to hold on to you a bit tighter.
He’d never forgive himself for wasting so much time pushing you away. But he wasn’t going to settle for that. Lando was still a fighter. And fighting for you… well that now felt like his birthright.
“It's you!" Lando exclaimed bursting through the door, his voice echoing through the garage, his eyes locked directly on your form, disrupting the calm chatter around the room.
The entire room came to a standstill, eyebrows furrowing, and the atmosphere thick with confusion. Your eyes found his, equally as bewildered as the rest of the staff in the room.
Lando repeated himself, his breathy voice much lighter and softer than before. "It's you."
"Me what?" You asked, face still a mix of confusion as you tried to grasp the meaning of his words.
With each step he took closer to you, your heartbeat quickened, uncertain of the nature of those words, and just how much was hidden beneath them.
"It's always been you," Lando confessed, his voice filled with sincerity. "I've never loved anyone because you've held my heart since you smiled at me on your first day in karting. I have loved you this whole time, but I was too scared and too stupid, honestly, to do anything about it, letting myself push away my feelings by running to someone else. But I'm not scared anymore because you don't deserve to be loved silently and from afar. You are the kind of woman that is meant to be loved loudly, with no second thoughts."
“Lan…” words deceived you.
“I love you Y/n and I’m not afraid to feel it and say it anymore. And I hope that one day you can tell me that you love me too” his hands found yours, the touch of his skin on your hands felt different.
Your cheeks heat up with his confession and you search his eyes who confirm his words to be true. He does love you. And you love him too. You’ve thought your love for him unrequited for so long that hearing him say those words to you seems like a daydream.
You realize by his fading eyes that you’ve been too silent through his confession. You know exactly what the look of doubt looks like on Lando’s face and you speak up quickly promising yourself that you’ll never be the cause of that distressing look on his face.
“Took you long enough to realize Norris” you chuckle pressing a soft kiss to his lips.
He catches up to you quickly wrapping his arms around you waist deepening the kiss.
“You belong with me.” He whispers, the warm words fall on your lips right before he kisses you again, both of you smiling into the kiss.
The room erupted in cheers and applause, congratulating the new couple. Finally, Lando had found what he had been searching for all along, right by his side, and you got what you’d been wishing for since you were little. A two sided love. You both were ready to embrace your love openly, no longer bound by doubt and hesitation.
^^
A.N. back again with that Taylor Swift inspiration :3
P.s. I think my neighbors hate me because I be listening to one song on repeat for like 4h..... *skull emoji*
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amber-sekio · 8 months ago
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Relationship Headcanons
Fandom: BSD -Bungo Stray Dogs
TW: none? I think? 
DAZAI 
I said it in my Soukoku fic, Dazai wouldn’t know affection if it slapped him in the face ten times 
Like he might realize when someone is showing interest in a sexual kind 
And he would probably notice if someone is crushing on him 
But like, if he likes them back? 
No 
Man is blind 
He’s too busy panicking over read denying his own thoughts and feelings over you to analyze your actions 
He’s busy trying to think of anything but how pretty you are when he sees you -thank you very much 
No joke though, this can be applied to pretty much anyone he cares about 
I mean he practically had a heart attack when Atsushi gave him flowers 
Anyways if he finally admits to himself that he likes you then I could see him trying to push you away if I’m being brutally honest 
He doesn’t want to lose you and he believes that anything he wants that he obtains, will be striped from him sooner or later 
But…, in a perfect world he would eventually work up the courage to ask you out 
He would probably avoid directly asking you but this is Dazai so he could defiantly figure out some round-about way to ask 
As for the relationship? 
He would still be his teasing self 
But he would tone it down 
Not because he doesn’t want to annoy you but more so because he actually lets some of his masks down when alone with you 
He defiantly is very clingy to you 
Man has been touch starved for a long time and he fears attachment too much to be touchy with the ADA members 
But now he has you, who not only tolerates him but has decided to stay with him? 
Of course he’s not going to let this chance slip from his grasp before all this inevitably ends (he’s still in denial) 
He never cared much for holidays like Christmas or Valentines 
But now he wants to experience them, with you 
He’s always thinking, plans and outcomes racing through his mind, what ifs and regrets  
But like, if you ruffle his hair, his brain just stops. 
Like no thoughts, he short circuits 
When his brain returned to him the first time it happened he panicked 
Like, who gave you that amount of control? 
After that first time he continued to try and get you to do it without asking 
He needed his brain to shut up every now and then, and now he has a reliable source 
Anyways, he likes to be a spoiled princess 
No one can change my mind 
For all his predictions he will never be able to predict your love and kindness for him 
CHUUYA 
Someone give this poor man a hug 
Ugh, my heart 
I can‘t imagine him wanting to date a normal citizen, too much of a risk 
So you’d probably have to work in the Mafia 
Even then, dating you would still be placing a huge target on you 
He would actually take you out on dates before asking you out 
Dates with him would be romantic 
Like dinner by candle light vibes 
He’d be strategic on where you guys sit 
No need to be precarious on what you order, it’s all on him 
When he does ask you out he would be slightly flustered but it just makes him adorable 
Say yes, he doesn’t deserve to be hurt any more 
He would spoil you to no end 
If you want it, you can have it 
You’re the only one allowed to call him short 
He might get flustered from PDA in the start but will gradually warm up to it 
Nothing clingy, just hand holding, a hand around your waist, a quick kiss here or there 
But if he sees some guy hitting on you? 
Down right possessive, arm snug around your waist, shoulder to shoulder 
And if he’s drunk? Even worse 
Like he’s pulling you onto his lap just to make sure that asshole knows your taken 
If you do work in the mafia with him, he likes going on easier missions with you 
And while he knows that you can handle yourself just fine, he can’t help but imagine something bad happening to you when he isn’t there to save you 
He’s lost too many people in his life, please, don’t leave him as well 
He loves when you rest your head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat 
And while you do that he’ll run his fingers through your hair 
Chuuya loves to spoil you rotten as I stated, it’s his love language 
So sometimes he’ll just hand you his black card and let you go shopping with friends or something 
In fact, he encourages you to buy what you want 
FYODOR 
Honestly? Where do I start with him? 
Like congratulations if you meet him and make it out alive 
I don’t know if I should congratulate him taking an interest in you though 
I feel like he believe that the interest he had in you was purely innocent curiosity 
But I also don’t think he would try to delude himself for as long as Dazai does 
Eventually he would notice that something was different about his interest for you than usual 
And while he would hesitate to put a name to it so quickly he would eventually give in after realizing there was no stoping this feeling from festering in him 
After coming to terms with his romantic? Feelings and interest in you he would definitely begin to manipulate you into feeling the same way for him 
If you don’t already that is 
If you don’t confess then he’ll definitely do the same thing Dazai did 
And when you agree, he of course knew you would, he makes you move in with him 
He can’t let his dearest other slip from his finger now can he? 
I feel like before ever getting into a relationship, you would have been made aware of his ‘work’  
Please, make sure the man eats 
And takes his iron pill 
Nikolai is getting a little tired of that daily routine despite how much he loves to be around Fyodor 
Anyways, dates aren’t a very common thing in fact, very, very rare 
I mean… what did you expect? 
Man’s a literal terrorist 
That being said, from time to time he’ll leave his ‘lair’ to spend time with you 
If you ask, he’ll gladly play the cello for you 
If he snaps at you for ‘bothering him with pointless things’ when you bring him his iron pill or food just listen 
Don’t bother him with such things 
And then same thing the next day 
And after some 4 or 5 days he’ll stumble from his room 
Staggering as he tries not to collapse or faint from both his lack of energy and his iron deficiency 
And when he walks into the kitchen trying to get the iron pill bottle open? 
Let him stumble his way over to you and ask for help before you finally do as such 
And he realizes just how dependent on you he’s become 
It’ll happen again eventually 
But as of that moment, it’ll at least be awhile before the cycle repeats 
(That last part of Fyodor’s was based upon some fanfic I read for him. I'm not sure who it was by, but I’ll tag it if and when I do find it.) 
A/N: anyways, believe it or not, I love Chuuya just as much as I do Fyodor and Dazai 
I’m just not as confident in his character. Since I’m a lot like Dazai, he comes easy to me and by substitute, Fyodor does as well 
But Chuuya? Despite him being one of my 5 favorites along with Dazai and Fyodor, I just don’t resonate personally enough with him to write him really well
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lolokouhm · 1 year ago
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pt.2 is out!
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"Could you rail me?"
That's not something Megumi expects to hear at 10 p.m. Especially coming from you. 
You're drenched - that's the first thing he notices. It's been raining the whole day, pouring even, making early autumn weather even gloomier than it usually is. You don't have an umbrella and the light jacket you put on yourself earlier in the morning looks completely out of place - it doesn't even have a hood to hide under. Or maybe it's not the jacket that feels off? Maybe that's just you.
You, the one who is always prepared. You, the one who is always put together. You, the one who, as far as he's concerned, should be in the cinema on a date with your boyfriend right now. A dickhead boyfriend, Megumi makes a mental note. He couldn't bring himself to like the guy, but as long as that idiot treated you right, he wasn't really in a place to say anything. But apparently, something has changed. 
"Could you rail me?"
Yeah, something has definitely changed.
Megumi doesn't really say anything as you get inside - your every movement is showing how furious you are, and it’s not like Fushiguro's not used to people with bad temper, it's just you're not one of them. He's never seen you like this before and, combining the situation with that question you’ve asked him twice, he's taken by surprise. That gets him thinking. Something must have happened, and judging by your face...
Then he notices. The smudged mascara, the barely visible traces on you cheeks, and your red, puffy, eyes.
You cried.
Megumi has seen you in various mental states, but never furious - and most importantly, never crying, so he couldn't possibly have any idea how seeing you like that would make him feel. He knows now. 
He'll kill him. 
"Come on, you need to take a hot shower, or you'll get sick", he finally says, his voice sounding surprisingly normal and calm. He's relieved - all these years of hiding his emotions and not letting them surface have at least some perks. Looking at your state, you need something - someone - to calm you down, and Megumi won’t let himself lose control just over his imagination and groundless jealousy. You need to tell him what happened first. 
So when you’re finally out of the shower, your hair still damp, drowning in his cotton, black T-shirt, Megumi is waiting in the kitchen - and he needs you to speak.
„He cheated on me.” It falls from your lips, light as a feather, and these words do something to him. Something that could have very bad consequences. „We broke up. But it doesn’t even hurt. I… I am so fucking stupid.” You’re not crying anymore - there’s a fire in your eyes that Megumi has never seen before. 
„He’s the one that’s stupid.” That is probably the nicest adjective out of many others he has on his mind right now. He observes you carefully as you adjust yourself on a high hocker next to him. 
„No, I am. I…” You sigh, hiding your face in your hands. „I didn’t cry because he broke my heart. That’s the problem. He didn’t.” That’s a relief, but Megumi’s still not convinced. His brows furrow, as he’s trying to understand what exactly has happened. „I was crying because I don’t fucking understand myself.” Your gaze suddenly jumps on him and the intensity of it makes him gulp. „That’s why I want you to rail me.” Before he can form a coherent answer to that, you speak up again. „I think I have feelings for you. Romantic feelings. And that makes me a cheater, because I went into a relationship knowing that. Or at least suspecting that.”
So many things Megumi didn’t expect to hear tonight.
He just stares at you, not sure, whether his heart is racing or it’s completely stopped beating. You’re blushing, but at the same time doesn’t look embarrassed. Despite that cute pink tone on your cheeks, you seem determined, and he’s not sure what he should do about it. 
„Or you can say you won’t”, you suddenly speak up again. The eye contact is so intensive, to the point it physically hurts. „You can say that and I’ll see if it breaks my heart. It’ll be easie-”
„I won’t rail you.” It jumps out of him faster than he’s able to process it, and his heart drops as your face turns pale. 
„Okay. It hurts. So this is a crush after all.” You stand up suddenly and rush somewhere - his apartament isn’t big, but the embarrassment hits you like a truck and you just need to hide. Or die. 
„How the fuck do you expect me to rail you?” Nervousness in Megumi’s voice makes you turn around. He’s got up from his seat as well, his worried expression long forgotten - now he just looks angry. „I’ve had sex like three times before. Fuck”, he sighs, pinching his nose bridge. As if that ever helped somebody to focus. He doesn’t have any other options though. „Jesus, (Y/N). You can’t just say these things like that. Why can’t you just like… say that you have a crush on me? At least I’d know how to answer”, Megumi murmurs and now you’re confused. 
He cannot comprehend the fact that you haven’t noticed. Everyone noticed. Itadori, Nobara, Gojo - everyone. Even he himself noticed. The gradual changes in your friendship, the staring, the smiles that cost him way more than anyone else, and yet he would give you them for free. The jealousy that came few months ago - with you being asked out, taken on dates, kissed. The irritation. And eventually, the nights where he would be so hard and frustrated, and the only cure seemed to be a memory of you. Of your skin. Of your touch. He was sure when your name left his lips that one particular night - he let his imagination run freely, and it sprinted to the point where he imagined it was your hand going up and down on his dick. He panicked a bit, that night. Your friendship was more valuable than anything else. He couldn’t risk it. 
So he endured. 
And now this?
That’s not fair. You play dirty. You asked that fucking question three times and now he’s sexually frustrated and stressed beyond what’s humanly possible. He tried so hard, gritted his teeth, tossed and turned - and you just destroyed everything. 
So when Megumi comes up to you to catch your face in his hands, you can feel his anger. And a million other things that convince you, that yes, Megumi Fushiguro could rail you without any doubt. He kisses you - and the kiss tastes like longing, like desperation, like something more, than just „liking”. Like…
„He was first”, he murmurs, as he pulls away, just millimetres, but enough to be able to say what he needs to say. His long, slender fingers rest on both sides of your face, the right thumb delicately brushing you cheek. A feeling completely different from that sudden kiss.
„What?” You feel a bit hazy and so does he.
„And you were always so happy… I just couldn’t…”, he mutters, running with his gaze when the embarrassment hits him. He curses himself for wearing that black sweater tonight, it’s so hot he cannot stand it - especially when your hands land on his covered chest.
„I was happy because I was with you, you dumbass!” You moan, and even though it’s not sexual at all, Megumi can’t help but groan. You are intoxicating. „I thought you didn’t like me… So I tried to…” You’re interrupted as he pulls you for another kiss, even more needy than the first one. And you suddenly forget what you wanted to say.
Megumi still remembers, but he needs you. If that’s a dream, then he just hopes he’s not going to wake up. Luckily for him, the way his body reacts is more biological than ever and that gives him some hope. 
„You tried to…?” 
„I tried to fall in love with someone else.” 
„You’re stupid then.” His lips travel down your neck as he’s leaving slow, sensual kisses all over it. You grip tightens on his forearm, nails diving between the sweater’s weaves just to find his skin underneath. You had no idea Megumi could kiss like that, and when his fingers slide down your collarbone, you find out that you had no idea that he could touch you like that either. „If you talked to me, we’d save a lot of time.”
„You could have said something too”, you whisper, and the combination of stress, anxiety and bliss makes your legs go weak. Luckily, Megumi’s here, and his arm keeps you in place. „You never say anything. And I…” A little whine interrupted you as his teeth grazed over your paper thin skin. „I don’t know how you feel.”
„You really can’t see it?”
„I need you to say it. I can say it. I’m in love with you, Megumi”. Is it really your voice, or are the angels singing? He could swear he got the chills. „Please.”
Years of hiding. Years of not saying anything. Years of keeping his feelings hidden. All that, just for him to make a confession.
„I’m in love with you, (Y/N).” It’s shaky, it’s soft and it’s quiet, falling into your skin and melting into your soul - something you needed so desperately. And that’s enough. 
You need to see him, so you cup his face into your hands, and the picture leaves you in awe - his soft cheeks are flushed, blue eyes shining with desire. It’s so unlike him, and the fact that you’ve actually managed to pull these words out of him shows how desperate he is.
„You can let go” you whisper, before pulling him for another kiss. „Don’t overthink it. Just… let go.” 
Who knows - he might rail you after all. 
masterlist ❤️
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shoot-the-oneshot · 7 months ago
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BEST OF MOTOGP
Marc Marquez x reader x Carlos Sainz love triangle.
Read Part 1 here
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3 years ago
With every step towards the garage your heart beat faster and faster, you have been working with the brand for what felt like forever and you finally got it. Redbull social media specifically focused on MotoGP you honesty would’ve been happy with any type of racing but you were ecstatic with your placement.
You don't know why you were nervous everyone has told you again and again how kind Marc was but you’ve had some unsavory experiences with other athletes coming up that didn’t understand or appreciate the new way of technology and in turn you.
You tried to keep your head up walking into the Repsol garage being amazed by the fast past everything was moving at. Being so caught up you jumped when a hand landed on your arm.
“I’m sorry, I’m Marc didn't mean to scare you.” He spoke holding a hand out for you, happily taking it. “Hi I'm Y/n, a part of the media team, its so nice to meet you”
Marcs eyes widened. “A new member of the family! please allow me to show you around.” He lead you all around the paddock introducing you to everyone you passed. Ending back at the Repsol garage he left you to a meeting with your boss wishing you good luck before he sped off to practice.
“He’s really nice right?” You spun to the right at the new voice seeing a slightly older than you blonde woman, who nodded to where you were watching Marc leave.
“Out of all the people I’ve worked with this team is by far the best and most welcoming, I'm Susan by the way while I'm technically in charge as long as you do the job and don't cause havoc we won’t have an issue.” She winked making you drop your shoulders and let out a breath you didn't know you were holding, making her laugh.
“Come on, I’ll show you the best spots for content during the race.”
1 year later (2 years ago)
“I’m really glad you let me come.” Marc spoke almost shyly with a red dusting across his cheeks as he followed your lead down the streets of your hometown. “How could i not, you practically begged.” You teased, smiling as you looked up at him as you stopped walking now there was only a few inches between you both.
“I’d beg just to learn your favorite color if that’s what it took.” He whispered, his fingertips grazing your cheek as he moved a strand of hair out of your face. Marc wishes he remembered the moment he fell for you, when he stopped seeing only the color of your eyes and started seeing his everything in them. But it's times like this he almost doesn’t care when, just that it’s there now.
“It’s red.” You answered breathlessly almost speechless from the was he was gazing at you. Your heart started racing as you noticed how close he’d gotten, his breath fanning across your face. “Tell me to stop.”
“I don't want you to.” Clutching his shirt in your hands to keep him close. Marc laughed lowly brushing his noes against yours, “Then tell me to kiss you.” He had to hear it, he had to know you wanted it as bad as he did before he did anything that couldn't be taken back.
Tired of waiting you pulled on his shirt crashing his lips against yours, Marc got over the shock instantly, pulling you tighter against him, so close you couldn’t tell where you ended and he began . Pulling away only when the need to breathe became overwhelming, even then he didn’t move away far.
“I really wish you would’ve done that sooner.” He smiled against your lips, and reluctantly stepped back remembering you were in public. Not before taking your hand in his. “Where’s that cafe you wanted to show me?” At his words you lit up practically dragging him in your excitement “Oh it’s right around the corner come on!”
During the season you shared many moments like the one shared then, getting closer and closer to each other and after the season you and Marc found yourselves back in your hometown it was just small enough that no one bombarded him plus he had never seen you so relaxed than when you were there. So his pushed to come back during the break.
“Come on champ i thought you were an athlete!” You shouted behind you where Marc was, you wanted to show him one of your favorite hikes it was rough but the view up top was worth it.
“I’m just making sure you don’t fall behind amore.” Marcs words dragged making you look back seeing his eyes locked on your butt, he only smiled being caught making you laugh.
Reaching the top, you shouted in excitement spinning around “we made it! Marc quickly wrapped you in his arms spinning you around kissing all over your face. “Marcy!” You giggled meeting his lips as he set you down.
“Come on we need a picture to remember this great feat.” You cozied up to Marc as you held out your phone being sure to get the view behind you, and capturing Marcs wide grin.
“One last photo together hm?” He said, looking everywhere but at you, sighing you rubbed his arm “It’s hardly the last time we will see each other, I’ll only be gone one season.”
“Practically forever.”
Present
Out of all the things you expected to see once you turned the corner was to see Marc and Carlos in some stand off their respective teams separating the two men. “What’s going on?”
Carlos who was just shaking out of Charles hold looked like a deer caught in headlights. “Nothing”
You looked to Marc knowing he would tell you the truth. But he just walked past you pausing once your shoulders met staring at the wall ahead. “I take it back, don’t pick him.”
Spinning around you grabbed his arm not at all finished with the conversation.
“You always tell me what to do first, not to fall for you now, don't fall for him what do you want!” You exclaimed not able to handle the mixed signals it nearly broke your heart when Marc told you nothing could happen between you two all those years ago because you worked together.
Flashback 1 year and a half ago
You and Marc layed by the pool soaking in the sun, legs tangled together. Smiling as you felt him press small kisses leading to your neck from your shoulder. “Stop” you laughed softly. Pushing him away just making him tighten his hold even more ensuring you couldnt escape. Caressing his face when he pulled away from your neck running your thumb over his cheek bone as he gazed at you.
“What color tie are you going to wear to the gala this year.” You asked out of the blue making his brows furrow and pull away further, making your hand drop. “Probably black why?”
“I wanted to make sure my dress matched.” Being a part of Redbull socials you were invited anyway and thought it would be cute to tie together. But seeing the look he got on his face you were starting to second guess yourself.
“You know no one can know we’re doing this right?” Your world screeched to a stop like a scratched record at his words. “What?” You breathed out. Marc sat up pulling away from you and sighed. “I don't want it to look bad on you if it got out, i care about you and don't want you to get all the hate you’d get for being with me. But we can still dance at the gala.” He spoke cuddling back into you, which you were gad for so he couldn't see your eyes glassing over. “Yeah” your voice cracked “yeah we can.”
(Flahback over)
Marc sighed. “We both knew being just friends would never work.” He grabbed the back of your neck pressing his lips against your forehead. “I’m so sorry for what i said before but i was always yours and i hope you’ll be mine one day.”
With those as his parting words you found yourself alone, needing time for your thought you decided to walk through the paddock to clear your head. Your heart eached seeing Ferrari red everywhere. After Marc shut down any chance of being serious, you begged for a change of scenery landing a place in F1 more specifically Toro Rosso whatever pain you felt Carlos helped you overcome and then you went back to MotoGP and everything got complicated.
“Y/N! Y/n wait!” Your body froze before you could think Carlos stood in front of you the next moment his eyes begging you to hear him out.
“I’m sorry you had to see that, you weren’t supposed to.” He breathed out, hands twitching like he fighting the urge to reach out. “Didnt apologize for doing it” he everted his gaze at your words before straighting up taking a deep breath.
“I know you have feelings for both of us, and i know i can’t do anything about it. But i just want you to remember who broke your heart and who picked up the pieces.” Carlos squeezed your hand that you didn't know he grabbed before turning to walk away,
You sighed falling onto your bed at the hotel, you knew it wouldn’t be smooth sailing with Marc showing up at Carlos race but you didn't expect this much trouble. Carlos was right he did pick up the pieces of your heart after Marc broke it, but part of you wondered what would’ve happened if you didn't run to F1 after that conversation.
During that season Marc didn’t disappear he made his presence known despite the unopened text from him in your phone he still sent flowers to every race and invited you back to Spain for the summer, perhaps he was right. Being just friends would never work
Your inner monologue being cut short by your phone going off, leaning over with a groan your brows furrowed at the text.
Carlos: check your email.
Ignoring the message you open your emails seeing a brand new one from Ferraris head of marketing personal email.
“Hello Y/n, it has come to our attention you were looking at other options outside of your current employer, you have come highly recommended from some of our employees during your time in F1 a few years ago and we would love to add you to our team. Given your close relationship to one of our drivers we think you would make a wonderful addition.
We have reviewed your current contract with Redbull and would like to offer to buy it out and add a 20% raise to your salary plus benefits. No need to interview please get back to us at your soonest convenience.
Scuderia Ferrari, Social media, Marketing team
Practically throwing your phone across the room your breathing picked up. While it was a fantastic offer and one that would definitely keep you and Carlos together it wasn’t what you wanted, wasn’t who you wanted.
Rushing from your bed you pulled open the door to your room and ran through the hallway stopping abruptly as you nearly bumped into Marc a few feet away.
“What’s wrong?” What are you doing out here.” You both spoke simultaneously.
“Ferrari offered to buy me out of my contract.” You rushed out making Marc roll his eyes and chuckle humorlessly. “So that’s what he meant.”
“You, you knew?” You stammered over your words. “That’s what he told me earlier” you’ve never seen Marc so withheld before, at least not with you.
“And you didn't tell me!” You exclaimed, Marc sighed running his hand over his face. “If it’s what you wanted i didn’t want to stop you. Would it kill me, yes, but all i want is for you to be happy even without me.”
“How good is the contract?” He asked before you could say anything, keeping a good few feet between you.
“Really good.” His face hardened at your words nodding his head he made a move to turn away before you stopped him.
“But not good enough to leave you.”
Marc spun back around so fast though thought he would’ve broken something making you giggle. “Really?” He asked needing to be sure it wanted to his imagination. “Ever since that kiss you’re all i wanted.” You whispered being afraid any louder tone would break the spell.
Marc quickly erased the distance between you and wrapped you in his arms nuzzling his nose against yours.
“Tell me you’re mine.” He smiled against your lips reminding you of the first time.
“I’m yours, i pick you.”
That next break you found yourself back sun bathing with Marc at your home in Spain, the sun shining off his wedding ring from its place on your thigh. Your husband sending daggers at stitch who was lounging in your arms.
“I never thought id be jealous of a dog.” He grumbled laying his head back down on your chest when you giggled. “Aw poor baby.” Rubbing your hand through his hair, feeling him smile against your skin. While it was a rollercoaster getting there you wouldn’t change the life you had for anything.
Woah what a ride i hope you guys liked it let me know in the comments Carlos’s part will be out soon check out part one and Carlos part here
Best of both worlds prt1
Best of MotoGP Marcs ending
Best of F1 Carlos ending coming soon
check out my master list for more
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authenticyuri · 1 year ago
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The latest Dungeon Meshi chapter is incredibly good for many reasons but one of them is getting to see Chilchuck's arc and him growing as a character, especially when it comes to his opinion on Laios as a leader and as a friend. I am so interested in breaking down their relationship development (this also doubles as chilaios propaganda btw lmao)
This got extremely long so I'll leave it under the cut <3
At the very start of the manga, and throughout most of the middle, Chilchuck clearly brushes Laios interests and personality off as being weird, just like pretty much every other character, but underneath that is a frustration that comes from him thinking that Laios could stand to be a way better leader than he is. Chilchuck is arguably way more qualified to be a leader in their group, but taking a leadership position is obviously not something he could easily do because of how prejudiced against his race is. In a world where most races see yours as disposable, it must be incredibly frustrating to be hired in a group with a leader who lacks social skills, is very forgetful, and seems to only care about monsters, when you both know you could do a way better job.
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Chilchuck has more experience when it comes down to that type of thing, given he organized a union for other halflings, and though he takes out his anger at Laios's naivety when it comes to that area, it's clear he does it out of care and just because he wants to see Laios improve. In dungeon groups, he's always been a follower, he's perfectly comfortable just being there to do his job, and do it well, then leave. He isn't itching for the opportunity to take over Laios's role, but he does want to have the type of leader he can easily rely on.
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But because of Laios's inexperience and also brash decision-making, Chil feels responsible for holding him back and being the glue to keep the team together, even though he may not admit it, (something we can clearly see when he chooses to sacrifice himself instead in the dragon fight despite the fact he often tells others he won't be useful in combat, as well as when he chooses to step in for Laios's place when talking with the Canaries).
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This is something even Laios has taken notice of, given that he wants Chilchuck to be the one to bring him back to his senses with a lecture right before his confrontation with the winged lion. Out of all the others, he depends on Chilchuck on being able to bring him back with his words.
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But anyways, Chilchuck's character arc comes from accepting Laios as a leader and growing fond of his unusual methods of leading rather than frustrated. In the shapeshifter chapter, when it came down to Laios having to differentiate Chil from his doppelganger, you can very much tell he is terrified of having to depend on Laios's judgement. I think it is also made worse by the fact that the shapeshifter is acting exactly like the worst preconceived notions about halflings other races have, and at this point the only thing present in his mind is the possibility that Laios will let him die and be replaced by a stereotype of all things.
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And even after Laios explains how he was successfully able to tell his team apart, (which was because of how they interacted with monsters and the dungeon), the others are impressed, but Chilchuck isn't content with just that and hoped that Laios would have known because he finally got to know the others on a deep level that Leaders are just inherently capable of.
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But of course, Laios isn't capable of something like that. He isn't a mind reader and he obviously can't distinguish other people's real thoughts or emotions, even if they are fairly obvious. Laios pulled a feat in a way that was accessible and made sense to him, and Chilchuck wasn't swayed because of how atypical it was of leaders to act. (Yes I also read this is a neurodivergent in a neurotypical world conflict).
This hesitance to fully trust in his abilities is also why he advised Laios not to accept becoming a king initially when Yaado asked Laios to. But after Laios defeats Thistle, by using his knowledge on dragons, similarly to how he defeated the shape-shifters, Chilchuck finally starts viewing Laios's unusual problem-solving in a positive light. It's when he first realizes that Laios's obsession with monsters isn't the thing that's holding him back, but a useful asset. His interest and knowledge is what saved them and got them all as far as they have. It makes sense for his development to go from believing Laios could never possibly be a king, to outright encouraging the idea. In his eyes, Laios has already been capable of doing the impossible, and thinks that he should stop underestimating what he's been able to do.
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A final point is that Chilchuck has always been able to read Laios like a book, and is aware of what's on his mind a lot of the time, but this used to only cause exasperation and contributed to seeing Laios in a negative light most of the time. However, in the last chapter, he is pretty much the only person who is able to tell that something about Laios seems off. He actually pays attention to Laios as a person and shows concern for his well being. Because he cares about him. Like he's obviously cared about him for a while now but I think this is the first time he's genuinely shown this much concern for any of his friend's mental state. I wanna cry
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Anyways conclusion being Chilchuck has not only finally accepted Laios as a leader, but as an incredibly capable individual who he genuinely respects. That’s it thanks for coming to my Ted Talk
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moroostar · 11 months ago
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– LIYUE BOYS REALIZATION ⋆
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–☆ fluff
–☆ including: Zhongli, Baizhu, Xiao, Xingqiu, and Chongyun
🗒: I know this isn't really as good as I want it to be, but I don't really want to re-write this.. this took me forever to finish ρ(・・、)..
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–☆ Zhongli:
Both you and Zhongli have been friends for quite awhile before he realized he was in love with you. You known about his past lover, Guizhong, and had felt bad when he finally opened up to you more in detail about his past.
You weren't sure how you exactly ended up being his close friend. All what you could remember was Zhongli sitting next you while you were having tea and reading a book.
"Do you mind if I sit here? There isn't any seats available."
Looking up from your book, your eyes meet with his golden eyes as you looked him up and down.
"Oh, well I suppose you can."
After you gave your approval of his sitting next you, Zhongli introduced had himself to you as you did the same, and from then on, both of you became close friends.
The moment Zhongli befriended you, he felt more.. comfortable with you, he couldn't really explain it.
"Zhongli? Hello? Earth to Zhongli?"
You waved your hand in front of his face, causing him to break from his trace.
"My apologies, I was.. spaced out."
A giggle escaped your lips. Zhongli's eyes soften and a smile appeared on his lips as he heard you laugh.
His eyes grew wide as realization hit.
There.
Your laugh is what caused him to realize his feelings for you.
Zhongli was in for a ride when he figured it out.
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–☆ Baizhu:
Being Baizhu's assistant was oddly calming for you. He wasn't rude or bossy at all, it made you happy that he wasn't like many bosses in Liyue.
Although Changsheng, is quite sassy with you, but she's grown to be affectionate with you as well. It has taken you awhile to get to this stage with her and not many people have seen her with anyone else, but Baizhu. In fact, no one has, not even Baizhu until now.
"Changsheng, I need to write this person's perspiration–"
The snake tighten her body around your neck, but too tight to choke you. A chuckle left your mouth as you attempted to write the perspiration once again, only causing Changsheng to nuzzle her face to your cheek.
While this was happening, Baizhu was stocking on the medicine that were getting low and was in the city of Liyue.
When he returned and was walking up the stairs, he heard you laughing and being curious as to why you were laughing, he quickened his pace up the stairs.
He found you and Changsheng together and saw how affectionate his snake was being with you. Baizhu never thought that he would see her being this comfortable around someone that isn't him.
A smile was forming on his lips as he watching the two. He was admiring how Changsheng has finally warmed up to you and how she became affectionate. Baizhu felt jealous even, but not too jealous of course. He more jealous of how Changsheng was able to be that close to you.
He felt more happy than anything.
"Baizhu! Hello, sorry that I didn't notice you earlier."
When he heard your voice, he felt his heart beat race quicker.
"No worries, but I see that Changsheng has gotten comfortable with you. She's rarely like that with anyone."
Changsheng was growing tired and yawned, falling asleep on your neck as you nodded and smiled at him.
That was the moment Baizhu realized his love for you and how he wants to be with you.
He was surprised at this, but didn't mind if it was you.
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–☆ Xiao:
Xiao had made a promise to himself to never get attached to anyone. And he kept that promise for many years, until he saw you with the Traveler, helping them to the Wangsu Inn. He beard about the Traveler for being the hero in Mondstadt and so did you, which is why you offered your help to them.
You went over the history of Liyue and how the Lantern Rite was close to appearing there.
When you arrived at the Wangshu Inn, you chatted with Verr Goldet and how they needed Xiao.
After you talked to her and told them what she had told you, you had decided that they can solve everything by themselves from here on.
"Where are you going to go? Why don't you stay with us!"
The Traveler has agreed with Paimon's statement as you looked at them both surprised.
"Really? I don't want to be a bother to you or on your mission."
They both had approved of you joining them on their quest in Liyue, almost like a tour guide for them.
When you all finally meet Xiao and the two Travelers from Mondstadt had to leave, you wished them luck on their journey to find the Traveler's lost sibling and hoped they come back to visit.
After they had left, you had remembered about Xiao and wanted to try to be his friend. Now, it took you a long time for Xiao to actually be more comfortable with you and allowed you to close to him, but it was all worth it to you.
Over the months you and Xiao had spent some quality time together everytime Xiao was free. Verr had allowed you to permanently stay there, as in exchange, you would help throughout the inn when they needed your help.
Most of the time you'll be with him during the night, it was he was the most available for you. You also know how much hard work he does and you wanted to treat him to his favorite dish, almond tofu.
You spent your time into making the dish for him, and when it was finished Xiao had came to you.
"Why are you here instead in our usual spot?"
You turned around to show him your reason for not being there.
"This is why!"
Xiao stood there and looked at the dish then you when he saw what you were holding.
"Is.. that almond tofu?"
"It is! I remembered that you talking about how it was your favorite food, and I know how much you're always fighting off monsters and such, so I wanted to make you this."
He felt his heart pace quicken, you really did listen to him when he talked to you and you remembered what his favorite food was.
His mind was filled with confusion. He cleared his throat before he spoke again.
"Uhm.. thank you."
The moment he knew he broke his own promise that he has kept for years to keep everyone safe from him, was when you made his favorite dish.
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–☆ Xingqiu:
Books had always been Xingqiu's favorite thing to do all the time. He would be so interested that he would lost track of time and wouldn't even notice that he was on the last page of a book until he read the last sentence and tried to flip to the next pme to find it to be finished.
Wanwen Bookhouse is the place where most of his favorite books are, he would always go there when he had free time for it. Normally it would be Jifang that would be managing the place when he would visit, but there was someone else that was there.
Xingqiu wondered who he was and where Jifang was, so he planned that when he figured out which book to get, he would ask him.
So, when he found a book that he was interested in, he went up to him to purchase the book.
"Oh? The Legend of the Shattered Halberd series? I've heard that this is an interesting series."
Xingqiu was slightly taken back that you attempted to make small talk from him.
"It definitely is, I'm quite fond of this series."
You hummed as he gave you Mora for the book then you gave him back his book.
"Where is Jifang? I normally see her here, and who are you if I may ask?"
"Jifang is sick and asked me to take care of the place while she rests for the day. I'm her nephew that she wanted to be her assistant here."
He raised his eyebrows in amusement as he took his book from your hand and said thank you before leaving.
Xingqiu was interested in you, but didn't know how to tlak to you again. He made sure to be finished with his book quickly (Xingqiu already tends to finish his books in 2 days or so), so he can go back again.
He continued to visited the Wanwen Bookhouse a lot more than he usually did, just so he can see you and make conversation with you. It went on for a while until you two eventually became friends.
The two of you would often read books together and have debates about them, or just had some tea together.
Eventually, he figured out that the series he read almost everyday was in the consideration of being discontinued due to the author's age.
Of course he was disappointed at first, but he knew it was going to happen someday. He told you about it and you saw the disappointment in his eyes, so you decided to make him a gift.
It took you some time to finish it, but you thought it was worth it if it made him happy.
You had gave it to him when you guys spent your time together again. He asked about what was in your bag, as you don't usually carry out a bag with you.
"Oh, so uh, you know how your favorite series has the possibility of being discontinued? Well, I had made you my– your own version of it. It took a very long time to make, but–"
Xingqiu immediately took the book and opened it to find it filled with the version that he remembered telling you what he hopes what could happen in the next book.
His face had heated up when he looked at the pages and a smile was starting to appear on his face.
He loved how you put your time into this just for him.
He knew what his feelings were towards you now, he was worried only for a little bit, but he quickly got over it as he realized that it was you that he grew feelings for.
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–☆ Chongyun:
He got another report about someone thinking they had unwanted spirits in their home, so of course goes to their home to excorise the spirit.
It took him about 3 hours just to find out that it has been a cat in the person's home. He was a lottle irritated about this, it was very clear to you. You felt guilty about it and promised to make him lunch everyday until you didn't feel guilty about it.
After 4 months of you making him lunch, you had already gotten over about being guilty, but you enjoyed cooking for someone else for once (malewife/j).
Chongyun had asked you if you still felt guilty about it and said he has forgiven you about it already, you told him your reasoning about why you still cook for him. He was embarrassed about the answer, but he didn't want you to stop making food, he enjoyed your cooking.
You also liked to write little notes when you give him his lunch, sometimes it'll say some words of encouragement or just some questions you had about him being an exorcist in Liyue.
When you were making his lunch, you decided to write a little something more special and decorate his lunch.
Chongyun came by at the usual time and picked up his lunch from you, he went to a place where he could enjoy the view of Liyue.
He opened his lunch to see what you had made and wrote that day.
'Your smile is very pretty, so is your eyes. I always get reminded of snow, or something, everytime I see them. Anyways, I wish you a good day, Chongyun ♡.
– Y/n'
While he kept re-reading the note, he felt his cheeks go red.
He soon enough calmed down, then looked at his lunch to see that you had decorated it to look like popsicles.
He immediately thought how cute it was with your note you put.
"I guess I'm glad that it's you."
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phr0gg13 · 10 months ago
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Do Not Wait.
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Luke Castellan x Reader
Synopsis: You and Luke have always been close, and so when the guy you trust most in the world decide to backstab the people you call family, you are torn in two. Warnings: Spoilers for the series! Angst, I dont think pronouns were used for the reader! (Please let me know if they were!) this story could be read as platonic or romantic feelings, I was inspired by the song Do Not wait by the Wallows!
It was a cold night when Luke came to see you, almost as if the gods knew what was in store. He had came up to you at dinner and asked to speak in private. You followed him to a secluded spot in the woods of Camp Half-Blood, there was an opening that showed the sun setting. It was like a painting, almost as if Apollo had painstakingly taken the time to think about each stroke of sunlight and how it would hit just right on Lukes face. How the clouds would form to be the most beautiful colors and how it would feel like a movie scene. Your heart was racing as you looked around. It was so pretty here, you and Luke were secluded and you wondered what he wanted to tell you. You were nervous and also excited to hear what the Hermes boy had to say.
"Please don't think I'm crazy when I ask you this (Y/N)...." His hands found your cheeks and he caressed them gently. Almost as if you were made of porcelain. Your heart was racing, thinking of every possible thing he could want to ask you. "Luke, I wont think you are crazy.... What's up?" You replied sweetly. Luke felt a small twinge of regret hit him, but he was already to far gone with his plan.
"Come leave camp with me." The words were like a slap in the face. You let out a small breath of air, the same way you would when someone says a terrible joke. "You're joking right? Why would we leave camp?" You were confused, it didnt make sense. Luke was happy at camp, he had you and Annabeth. He had all his siblings. Why would he want to leave? "Because, (Y/N)," his grip on your face got tighter, it was like he was afraid you would leave, "The gods... They don't care about us. They never have and they never will.".
"Thats why you want to leave camp? Because the gods are selfish and act like gods?" You were in disbelief, "Luke where would we even go? What would we do?". He sighed and looked deep into your eyes "There are people who want to take the gods down, who can provide us with the means to show the gods not to forget us. We can finally speak out against them, do something to stop their childish ways!.". You shook your head, "Who...?"
"Kronos has been visiting me in my dreams, he wants to build an army to fight against the gods. He wants me to help." Luke smiled at you when he said that. It made you sick, you took his hands off your face and looked at him with a hurt expression. "Luke, you can't be serious? We need to tell Chiron and Mr.D about this! If Kronos wants a war... Who knows who else will follow him? How many titans will rise up against the gods? It could be catastrophic, Luke. World ending!!".
Luke shook his head, "We can't tell Chiron, we can't tell anyone. Not yet, Kronos isn't strong enough to fight." You shook your head and looked away, why was this happening. You noticed the sun was almost set, everything was dark and you felt like your heart had been ripped out of your chest. "What about Annabeth?" Your voice broke as tears threatened to leave your eyes. "What about your siblings, your friends?!". Luke sighed, this wasn't how he had planned it going, "They will understand once we tell them. Once we show how strong the army is!." Luke kept going on about how everyone would join him and Kronos. He just kept talking, trying to make you join him. "Luke!".
You looked at him as your tears flowed down your face. "I am not joining you. I can't, this place is my home! These people are my family! I don't care about the gods, I don't need anything from them. I am happy and content with staying at camp.". Lukes expression dropped, it switched from heartbroken to numb in seconds flat. "Fine... But you can't tell anyone my plan. Not yet...". You turned your head and rolled your eyes, about to object to his demand. Yet he had pulled out a sword from a nearby bush, he had planned it all out. Your reflexes kicked in immediately. Quickly you pulled off your bracelet that turned into your sword. A gift from your godly parent. Ready to fight against Luke.
The two of you often trained together and so you both knew how the other fought. Though Luke was still faster and stronger. He also studied your flaws when fighting, he knew how to abuse them. This resulted in him tripping you on the ground. Your sword fell out of your hand and you tried to crawl to grab it, but Luke stepped on your wrist. You cried out in pain, "I'm so sorry (Y/N), but you made me do this..". Luke raised his sword, and for a moment you thought he was going to hit you with his blade. You thought your best friend was going to kill you, yet he maneuvered his sword to where the hilt was pointed at you. He landed a blow to your head and you were out cold. Luke set you up on your back and put his jacket he was wearing over you. He cried, but not because of the choice he made. He cried because of the choice you made. He walked off to go find Percy....
You had woke up with an insane headache, you were warm and in a bed instead of on the cold ground of the forest. You looked around weakly and saw Annabeth and Grover sitting in chairs nearby. You were in the infirmary. You noticed that they were talking to someone else, another person in a bed. One of the campers who was working in the infirmary noticed you were up. They quickly got you some water and asked how you were feeling. You told them about your head and they nodded. You had a concusion... Eventually Chiron and Mr.D came into the infirmary. They started to ask you questions of what happened to you. You told them all you remember and they both looked at eachother. Chiron shook his head, he had a remorseful look on his face.
"Chiron, where is Luke?" You asked as you noticed his jacket on a nearby chair.
"Luke is missing. We assume he is now working with Kronos..."
Your already broken heart was crushed as you heard those words. You are left wondering how long your best friend had truly been gone for.
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proxductions · 1 year ago
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“My love is only for you.”
summary: Everyone loved Cedric Diggory, and the girls of Hogwarts can't seem to remember that he has a girlfriend.
pairings: Cedric Diggory x Ravenclaw!reader
word count: _
warnings/notes: a tiny bit of angst here and there. some lovely person wanted me to write about cedric so here I am 🖤 I will also be making a new post about someone who you might’ve seen all over your tiktok page. enjoy!
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“The green-eyed monster can rear its ugly head in the most unexpected of places. In love, it can be a warning sign of Jealousy.”
"They're at it again," sighed your friend Hannah Abbott. You were both walking to your next class, discussing the fact that the Yule Ball was just tomorrow, when you both caught sight of yet another girl trying to flirt with your boyfriend, Cedric Diggory.
It was clear that Cedric was not interested in the brown-haired girl who was twirling her hair, fluttering her eyes, and pouting her lips.
You sighed at the scene and exclaimed, "How many times do I need to tell them that he's got a girlfriend? Why can't they put that in their stupid brain!"
Cedric immediately caught your voice and saw you. He gently smiled and pushed past the girl, who huffed as she saw who he was walking towards.
"Hi," Cedric said with a charming smile.
"Hello," you said coldly. You didn't know why you were mad at him, you just were.
Cedric knew when you were mad. He recognized that cold voice of yours and furrowed his eyebrows.
"Listen, I keep on telling them that I'm taken, but I don't think they want to accept tha-" He started but before he could finish his sentence, you were off.
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It was finally the time.
You walked down the stairs when you were done and saw Hannah, who also looked absolutely stunning.
"Oh! I didn't know what to wear!" Hannah said, not noticing you yet. "There was this black long gown, but I didn't want to wear that. Oh! Did you see Hermione Granger? When I tell you, she looked absolutely--" Hannah stopped blabbering immediately when she saw you.
You were dressed in a large gown with the colors f/cs, and you looked absolutely amazing. The gown reached the floor and had the details of beading and a lace.
Your friend was absolutely flabbergasted.
"Oh, you're gorgeous!" she had finally said.
You gently smiled as you thanked and hugged your friend.
When you released your friend, you saw him.
It was as if he was looking for someone. He was towering over a lot, so it wasn't a trouble when his eyes had met yours.
He gapped at the beauty that he held his eyes with.
He quickly pushed people to get to you, and when he saw you, he immediately kissed your hand.
"You're beautiful," Cedric had said breathily.
Despite the presence of a large crowd and the loud noise, there was an unusual sense of stillness and silence.
Cedric then reminded himself why he was desperately looking for you. "Listen - can we talk?"
You nodded your head as he then gently held your hand away from the loud crowd.
In a deserted corridor, he started to talk.
"I don't know why they keep on talking to me as if I'm not taken. I truly don't know why, believe me. But all I need to say, and what you need to remember is that I'm yours, y/n. My love is only for you."
This had truly given you an opening, and you kissed his cheek softly.
"And I'm yours too. I'm sorry I reacted that way." You Shamelessly said.
"It's fine, really. I understand why."
You both shared a moment where you locked eyes, and in that moment, nothing else seemed to matter.
“can we just.. go back to the ball?”
Cedric then leaned in and planted a soft kiss on your cheek, sending a warm sensation throughout your body. The feeling of his lips on your skin lingered, making your heart race and your cheeks flush.
"Lead the way, my love."
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lilly-onthevalley · 2 months ago
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Tips for my girlies in university and early work
I decided to make this post based on what has made my life easier these past few years. Every woman wants to cultivate beauty; make themselves put together, be taken seriously, and find a partner who is equally yoked if you're into that. As an old tumblr girl shifting in and out of the scene, I wanted to make another tip post like the old times that's accurate to what helped me.
A lot of the older/retired girlie's where amazing advisors, however one thing that created a barrier was that they were were endowed with large wealth and their society paved a path for them, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that, I love to see it actually. I wanted to make a post looking back to what has helped me make my own steps to now be able to utilise the old girl's advice as it was supposed to.
Hair
Learning a basic blow out is necessary. If you're starting out, you don't need all of the fancy brands, and you'll notice that technique is what differentiates the quality of a blowout. Get a good round brush that conducts heat well, mid range but reliable (Babyliss) blow driers, flat irons, and curling rod. Invest in a heat protectant too. Sweet talk the hair dressers and ask where they get their stock from. Get yours hands on some pro hair sheers to get your own trims and layers going.
Silk scrunchies and pillow cases are an underrated and feminine must-have. I'm a lazy girl who always has a silk press if my hair is out and I can get away with collapsing onto a silk pillowcase with no head wrap and still manage to have a lovely style in the morning. I would say order these from a small business. Many girls have businesses dealing with small textile projects like scrunchie packs and average size pillow cases, support them! :)
Learn to do your own cornrows and invest in a half wig especially if you're busy with classes and don't have time for the whole round brush ordeal.
Don't be scared of wigs, and don't be ashamed of not having enough time to pull off a dazzling natural masterpiece. There's a reason why wigs are in high demand from women of all races. People are all over busy. You can start with a natural synthetic and move on to better hair.
I learnt the art of hair when I was 15, so I've been doing it for a while. However, because of this, I can tell you the importance of having a lovely crown on your head. I have received hundreds (not joking) of compliments from years, whether my hair was real or fake, and that shows how important it is for a first impression.
Nails/Feet
Don't forget to take care of them. Walking all the miles, wearing the mandated courts, sitting in one place. You will indeed develop calluses, perhaps even athletes' foot and hyperpigmentation from a lack of circulation.
Get yourself a basic pumice stone or a scrubber and use them when need. Massage yourself as well to maintain mobility and flexibility.
If you can, get yourself an affordable gel set. It might seem a bit expensive, but it'll save you the time and money of the upwardly costly nail appointments. You'll find out when you get up and socialise more that what tops the cake of classy is a glossy basic nail. Natural nudes and whites are always a go to.
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Scent
Scent connoisseurs are going to absolutely hate me for this, but girlie's, if you can't get that Jean Paul Gaultier or Baccarat Rouge, get the damn arabic fragrance. Back in high-school when me and my girls were starting up, setting ourselves apart and getting invited to important places, Lattafa was our favourite. Social media is currently finally going crazy for them. (The African/Arab girls got them first 🤭.) I loved my floral Haayati with a mix of Zakra (other brand, heavy masculine oud tones for my peace of mind), and my best girl loved her gourmand Yara and her vanilla oils.
I love to talk about fragrance because it talks first for you. Nothing is better than a delicious light smell accompanying your presence. It shows you hold yourself to some esteem.
Skin
Face Essentials - gua sha stone, gentle cleanser, exfoliating cleanser or serum, sunscreen, thick moisturising butter, anti fungal or bacterial essential oil, lip moisturiser, clean cloth.
These will help you start out on a basic level to having healthy looking skin. Exfoliating is very important towards a glow. When you're stuck working with a bright light in your face, soaking up the harsh morning air full of car exhaust, sweating as the hours go by - what will make the difference is making sure that you get rid of that excess dead skin every 3-7 days.
Gua sha is amazing for getting rid of the stress if you clench your jaw during moments of stress. Say you have to present an assignment or address and debate a crowd, that takes a tole on the jaw and the facial muscles. Using a gua sha is great for ironing those knots and that tension out.
On the topic of massage, spas can be unaffordable at times, time is could also be a problem. Get into a habit of using every minute you have. That 5 minutes that you sit and doom scroll on tik tok, take out a wood tool, grab a moisturiser, and press those muscles to release built-up tension. Taking care of the vehicle you have is so important. Your body and mind are separate but complimentary. Take care of her, and she will take care of you. Don't forget that every second, she's pumping the blood that facilitates your social meetings and work hours.
When it comes to body, get yourself exfoliating mits or an abrasive rag. Once again, exfoliation, exfoliation, exfoliating. It's great for blood flow and circulation as well as moving your muscles and tissues that may be constantly seditary from a desk.
Dry brushing is something I also swear by. Once again, absolutely wonderful for circulation and waking the skin up.
Get yourself a foam roller... I press such an emphasis on these tools that stimulate the muscles because we often forget how much our bodies are taking multiple hits from working. Joint issues are something that's prevalent when you're a working girl, coming straight out of high-school and going into the world outside the home of your care taker. Roll those legs out, release that back into the grooves. It makes a world of difference!
Clothing
I loved to dress like a blank canvas back in my early days when I decided I want to make something of myself. Nothing beats good denim pants and a white t-shirt. Especially when you're starting out and want to begin establishing outfits for everyday, you'll notice the blank canvas approach will prevent you from looking crazy on crazy days. Stock up on 3 white tees, white and blue jeans, yoga pants, well fitting good quality skin tone lingerie, a belt, a watch, some fake pearls, black or white dress, a ring and a necklace and my all time favourite, a pair of shades.
Ugh, I can't get enough of combinations like this. I grew up and was educated by women who followed this but fancied it up with a bold Goyard St Louis, a 3 stone engagement ring with a gold band, a local pure and heavy polished silver bracelet and some Loro Pianas. Absolutely gorgeous women, who knew how to constantly present themselves as nothing less than reliable, stylish and beautiful.
You might say that, 'Omg Lilly, that's so boring', that's not the point here 😂. As a green girl with a good head on your shoulders, you're going to get a lot of new opportunities. Whether it's internships, parties, socials with the girls or the guys, dates, fund raisers, club representative workshops, you're going to be expected to show up well and put together. Say you have a social evening at a club house, in the morning you have an internship and the next day you have to manage and represent your society. Those 3 white shirts paired with a rotation of basic bottoms and versatile shoes will make things a lot easier for you especially if you're starting out in a foreign country where you don't know what is to be worn exactly.
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Makeup
Those who have known me are well aware that I'm a retired goth girl and was killing it with the cut crease and James Charles tutorials back in the day. Makeup is something that has seamlessly became part of my life. Unfortunately or fortunately, I grew out of that creative phase and started wondering what actually makes my natural features and face pop. What presents me as healthy, bright, and hyper-feminine (in contrast to the basic clothing)
I came up with the recipe of 'Biology' makeup. Blush because it signifies healthy blood flow and interest in the person you're interacting with. Healthy full eyebrows, non-matte evenly toned skin with naturally bronzed dimensions. A healthy hydrated pink lip. Some extras are a little liner to enhance the eye, flirty lashes from carefully applied mascara and/or lashes and some depth and glitter to draw attention at the eyes.
Very basic, very safe, very attractive, very reliable. This is a routine that can be executed within 8 minutes.
Moisturiser -> sunscreen base -> full coverage foundation or concealer watered down with sunscreen to make it more glowy and allow the natural dimensions of the face to peer through->bronzer/darker powder-> semi heavy blush combined with some loose banana powder to calm down the concelar-> light wing-> lashes-> wipe the lips and eyebrows-> fill both in and end with a natural colour applied to both.
Inspo below
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E.T.C
Other important notes:
Yoga, cardio and pilates to maintain mobility, lubricate those joints, crack those bones back into place. Sweat is amazing to get those toxins, lose a bit of unnecessary weight, blow off steam, improve skin health, get your blood pumping and much more.
Save your money, all these things are meant to make life simpler for you so you are in a place where you are investing into things that are truly important like rent, food, tuition, remittances, dental work, medical aid, insurance, etc till you have someone who could assist with that :)
Remember to keep a balanced diet. Oh lord, when I went out to a new country, thank god I was young, but I became close friends with the local McDonald's and knew all of the door dash delivery men by name. Please, for the love of God, buy your fresh food and meal prep. The temptation is so real after a long night, to drop a bunch of pounds or euros on a quarter pounder and some zinger wings but it will not nourish you to survive another active day with decent cognition and drive. Especially if you were living alone and stressing out about making your own path, don't feed the delivery demon. You'll lose useful money, and mess your hormones up.
Instead to reward yourself, buy your place some flowers. If you want to eat go to a restaurant which serves whole food. Buy some new fancy stationery, party, get a spa or cosmetic treatment that you've been wanting, travel or take a train to somewhere scenic! Perhaps I'm too harsh but addiction to quick fixes is real when you first drop into a state of independence whether it's financially or physically. Don't abuse it by splurging. Understand moderation through strict monitoring then after a while, go get that Wingstop or whatever after knowing how to access real food and that it's an affordable and doable option first! (me and my guy friends literally never ate any real food for a month straight while gallivanting in Europe because we were so codependent on Taco Bell and used our lack of knowledge of the city as an excuse to take the easy way out 🤣.)
If you can do something really well, make a mini business out of it.
Network, network, network. Ask questions, ask for opportunities, get numbers and business cards.
Self defense starter kit (Google it according to the laws of your nation)
Lastly, make friends, call family, volunteer at an animal shelter every now and then to remind you of what love is 😂 because in the fast paced assimilation into new environments, you do forget and only notice when suddenly you're sadder than usual, and have anxiety during basic interactions.
⭐️
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sillygoose067 · 8 months ago
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Charles’s Angel(s)
Ch.6
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Charles Leclerc x Reader
Author’s Note: Finally! The moment has come, when we get a snippet of Charles’ first appearance. Stay tuned tomorrow for more.
The following few weeks in Monaco were spent settling in and looking for new jobs. You had been working part time at a music production studio, having been certified to do so early in your high school career. But you had also been appointed as a choreographer for a large Korean Entertainment company, JYP. 
You felt so fortunate, being able to not only choreograph dances for some of the most famous groups in the world, but also contribute to their discography, often writing lyrics, producing music, and singing the guide tracks to help the artists when they’re in the recording booth. 
Of course, this meant that you were often out of the country, and you missed Leila and Marie dearly. But you were glad that you were finally able to do things that you enjoyed. 
One day, as you were back home in Monaco, your mother called for the weekly check-ins she had been doing since you’d left California. “কেমন আছ?” (Kemon accho?: How are you?)
As you continued conversing, Marie knocked on your doorframe. “Hey, I have to ask you something”
“Yeah just hold on one sec”, you finished up talking with your family and turned to her. 
“So…”, recognizing the tone she used when she did something impulsive, you demanded she spit it out. “I may or may not have gotten us tickets to the next F1 race in France…”
You sighed and asked when it was. 
“And I made sure that it was on a day where you were going to be free”
She looked at you guilty. You sighed again and just held her close. “Of course I’ll go for you”. 
You face palmed as she explained to you that maybe, just maybe, one of the many handsome drivers that were, of course, not already taken, would catch your eye. Or even better, that you would catch their eye and something could begin from there. 
You just stood there with a reluctant look on your face. You had given up hope long ago and had accepted that perhaps there was no one in the world for you. But you accepted begrudgingly, not wanting to squash Marie’s sunshine. 
As the days passed and came closer to race day, Marie grew more and more excited. Apparently, she had loved watching the F1 races since childhood, and knew all the names and scores, times, and podiums of all the current racers. 
Finally, the day came, and you both got dressed, donning red, because apparently We’re here to root for the Ferrari team, Y/N! Even Leila was not spared from the wrath of Marie. Dressed in a cute red dress, Leila looked like the cutest little flower you’d ever seen. 
As you made your way to the stands, Marie pulled two passes out and showed the security team. Wow this girl really went all out and got us passes to the paddock and basically everything behind the scenes. To say you were impressed would be an understatement. 
The three of you settled into a corner, surrounded by screens, technicians, mechanics, and all the engineers and mathematicians bustling around, preparing for the race. You watched in awe as everyone worked in harmony and completed one task after another. So caught up in the moment, you failed to notice two new people step into the garage. Only when Marie clutched at your arm and let out a squeal, did you look to where she was staring and notice them— both extremely beautiful specimens of men. 
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crow97street · 4 months ago
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─── ⋆⋅blurry face⋅⋆ ───
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synopsis ✦‧₊˚ chan struggles with intense feelings and undiagnosed issues and resorts to the only thing that brings him relief
warning/tags ✦‧₊˚ self-harm, self deprecating thoughts, hints? of self hatred, lots of overwhelming feelings, college au, changbin is chans best friend, channie loves bin <3, hurt/no comfort (sorry…)
notes ✦‧₊˚ sorry guys feeling emo this is just a short fic i wrote cos i struggle w sh, and again, this isn’t something to fantasize about or to hope chan does any of this, simply just me projecting onto people/characters i love because i don’t enjoy writing about myself :)
word count ✦‧₊˚ 1,336
song rec for this ;)
⋆ ̊。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊。⋆
One exhale. Two exhales. Three. Four? Chan’s lost count, everything is starting to blur together in a jumble of colors and sounds. Where is he? Why is it so cold? A loud laugh breaks Chan out of his reverie to drag his eyes to the source of said sound. There's a few other college students laughing at some dumb tiktok the tall one of the three showed them. Chan exhales shakily again and moves his eyes back to the bus stop he's currently waiting in. The winter chill has finally set in, and it’s fucking cold. Chan enunciates his point by pulling his jacket around himself tighter with a shiver.
How many times has this happened by now? These moments of intense dissociation, fright, too much. It’s always too much. He can’t seem to keep the feelings at bay no matter how hard he tries. It’s a repeat like a broken record that won’t just stop.
The halting screech of the familiar bus drags Chan out of his own head again. He stands on wobbly legs and rushes into the bus to find his usual seat. He blinks. It’s taken. God this day could not go any worse for him. Chan forces his legs to take him to another chair. It’s just a seat, just a seat, just a seat. He repeats in his head to stave off the onboarding panic he knows is growing.
After a few more deep breaths Chan manages to quell the doom that tried to reach his exhausted mind. His head snaps up when he hears the breaks again. Changbin. Chan’s heart soothes at the knowledge his best friend will board the bus soon, Changbin always helps.
“Hyung!” Chan is greeted by Changbin’s infectious smile as he plops down next to him.
“Hey bin.” He exhales weakly giving Changbin the best smile he can muster, which is unfortunately not very good. Of course Chanbgin notices.
“You alright dude?” Changbin’s expression grows tainted with concern.
“Yeah yeah sorry, long night. You know how it is.” Chan sighs out giving Changbin a comforting expression to ease his worries. Chan never did like when people worried about him.
“Tell me about it, Professor Geon has me by the ass with this week's homework.” Changbin exhales heavily, sinking into the chair and closer to Chan’s arm. Normally, Chan would recoil and ask them to step back, he doesn’t like when people touch him without warning him. But Changbin’s touch is allowed, safe.
“Yeah I’ve had way too many late nights for comfort lately. As if it’s unusual for me though.” A self deprecating chuckle follows Chan’s quiet sentence. The hum of the bus fills the air for a moment before Changbin speaks again.
“Still struggling with your insomnia man?” Changbin’s eyebrows furrow as he speaks. Again, the worry. Ugh. It’s not like Chan doesn’t appreciate it, he does, he’s happy there's someone even on this earth who cares about Chan. But he hates anyone acknowledging that he has struggles, it’s just too much, again.
A deep sigh.
“Yeah, unfortunately. It’s fine though.” Chan trails off at the end as he spots the university approaching in the window. Chan nods his head in the direction to alert Changbin as he begins to stand.
They walk out together into the frozen air and Chan prepares himself for whatever today may bring him.
⋆ ̊。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊。⋆
The door slams as Chan races inside his apartment. Shit. It’s happening again. One exhale. Two. Thr- Oh fuck it.
He rips the drawer open - not a smart move on his part the thing is quite old and rattles dangerously as if proving his point - and frantically begins searching. Chan whines with frustration as a few minutes pass with no luck.
“Shit.” He cries out with a quiver in his voice. The blur is getting worse, he can hardly see where he’s going. What was supposed to be an easy day of classes, had now transformed into a horrible horrible day.
Chan gives into his desperation to stop the blurring by racing to his kitchen and searching the drawers. His hand graces over the familiar handle of his lighter. Finally. Chan exhales loudly and quickly brings the lighter out stumbling to his bed.
Guilt bubbles up in his chest like a raging campfire someone keeps adding gasoline too. He knows it’s a filthy habit he’s grown since high school but it’s the only thing that helps. It’s become a starving addiction that he can’t escape no matter how many - non harmful - alternatives he tries.
Chan slides down the foot of his bed landing on the soft carpet. Changbin gifted it to him on his birthday a few years ago as a housewarming gift. Chan spots the orange stain of bleach from the time Changbin agreed to help Chan dye his hair during one of his many mental breakdowns. He drags his eyes back to the lighter in his hand and quickly scrambles out of his jeans that suddenly feel two sizes too small.
His brain zeroes out until the comforting burn ignites on his skin. A few seconds pass before Chan puts out the flame, releasing a deep exhale. Another hot singe brands onto his thigh. Another exhale. Frustrated tears well up in Chan’s eyes, he scrubs away at them with his sleeve and stands up, still pantless. Chan slowly drags himself to the bathroom and addresses his wounds before changing into some pajamas.
He crashes onto his bed with a tired groan. He was hoping it wouldn’t come back to this. Why did it have to help? Why did it have to hurt so good? Chan punches his mattress in anger towards himself.
It’s dumb really, humans try so hard to stay alive. We weep in hospital rooms over loved ones diagnosed with terminal cancers. We fight and cry for those we’ve lost to weapons and aggression. But at the end of the day, in the silence and gloom of our homes, we hurt ourselves to fight what we can’t with our fists. Chan would like to say he’s strong, he’s survived until senior year of college, that’s a pretty good accomplishment right? But when everything is said and done, his mind is his own personal prison that he’ll never be strong enough for.
Chan laughs at the obscurity of it all before he drags himself up to trudge to his kitchen. He quickly pops his sleeping medication into his mouth and chases it with a large gulp of an old water bottle on his counter. He returns to his bed and lets the darkness of his room consume his mind.
⋆ ̊。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊。⋆
Chan gazes out the frosted window of the bus as he awaits Changbin’s arrival. His thighs sting with the reminder of his actions and Chan cringes at the feeling. Unfortunately Changbin approaches just then.
“You okay hyung?” Changbin asks scanning his frame for any injuries.
“Yeah all good my legs are just sore, went too hard at the gym yesterday.” Chan plays off his discomfort with a small joke.
Changbin - the ever loving gym rat - of course bites at the bait and his expression lights up.
“Yahhhh I know right! You skip leg exercises once and now you regret it for a week.” Changbin complains loudly and takes his respective seat next to Chan.
Chan zones out as Changbin rambles off about some new equipment at his gym not working. Sometimes Chan wishes Changbin would notice it’s not just a paper cut, that it’s not just him touching a hot cookie pan, that it wasn’t just doing too much at the gym. But deep down Chan knows he won’t be able to face Changbin if he knew how pathetic Chan was to hurt himself for relief. Silly, isn’t it? Oh well, Chan will accept the blur of color and sounds into his weeping mind until some part of him breaks. But for now, he’ll pretend.
He’ll pretend.
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