#how is everyone doing now that Harry is done with Tour

[harrywavycurly]

Lonely request!! Bachelorette instagram posts that make Harry not only miss his bestie turned fiancé but also kinda concerned because what exactly are they doing in Miami 😂❤️

Hiiii babes!!! So I combined both of these into a little something and I hope you enjoy it! 💖

Find all things Lonely here✨

CW: Mentions of drinking

Tag List: @blckburd @fangirl509east @ell0ra-br3kk3r @youngpastafanmug @mattieshattuck1

A/N: Harry misses you and if he’s being honest he’s just curious what all you’ve gotten up to while in Miami, enjoy some fluff and if you squint you’ll see some jealous Harry✨

Harry lets out a sigh as he runs his free hand that’s not holding his phone through his hair, a small smile creeps its way onto his face as a photo of you quickly flashes across his screen in a pair of heart shaped bedazzled sunglasses that say “bride to be” on them as you lay out next to a pool. It’s only been two days since you left for your Miami bachelorette trip with Niall and the rest of the bridesmaids and he’s been glued to his phone checking instagram what feels like every five minutes to see what you’re doing, like right now he’s on Niall’s instagram story and can see you’re having a themed lunch of some sort while yesterday all you really did according to your social media was have a pool day and went to a nice little dinner. Niall made it quite clear to Harry that while you were off in Miami his communication with you was to be limited, it’s your bachelorette trip and to quote your bestfriend you “don’t need your future husband up your ass the whole time” so Harry is trying his hardest not bother you and he’s done well so far but it’s only day two and he’ll be honest, he already misses you terribly.

Normally Harry has things like studio time or if he’s lucky a tour to prep for to help distract him in situations like this, but he’s not currently working on anything at the moment so he has nothing but time to sit on the couch and scroll through everyone’s Instagram for even the smallest little crumb of a detail of what you’re up to. He doesn’t expect you to be doing anything too scandalous because that’s just not who you are, but still it’s your bachelorette trip and Harry’s been privy to a few of those types of parties so he knows how wild those can be. But really Harry simply wants to know what that Irishman planned for you because he kept most of it to himself not even telling you the majority of the plans besides what you needed to know in order to know what to pack. And Harry knows if there’s one thing Niall can do, it’s plan one hell of a party so to turn it into a full blown trip only makes him even more curious what he has up his sleeve for you. So when Harry is scrolling on your page and sees you’ve posted a few new photos he feels his eyes go a bit wide before he runs a hand over his face and lets out a laugh as he shakes his head.

He likes both photos and starts to scroll but before he gets far he feels his phone begin to vibrate and soon your name and photo is filling up his screen making a grin take over his face. Harry quickly hits answer and brings the phone up to his ear and is met with the sound of laughter making him wonder if you didn’t mean to call him.

“Harry?” You mumble as Harry hears what sounds like a door closing making the loud laughter turn into a muffled sound in the background. “S’that better? I can’t hear you.” Harry chuckles as he begins to realize what kind of call this is.

“Hi my love.” He can practically hear you smile into the phone as you let out a long dramatic sigh as he hears a ruffling sound making him think you probably just plopped down onto a bed.

“I can hear you now-oh did you know m’gon a be a wife? Like someone’s actual wife.” Harry just grins as the slightly mumbled words fall from your lips and he wishes he was there because he’s always loved being around you when you were a little drunk, you always tended to be more cuddly.

“Yeah? You getting married baby?” He asks sweetly as he gets comfortable on the couch, you let out a giggle that makes his heart feel like it’s going to actually melt due to how adorable you sound.

“Yes.” You answer with a smile on your face as you roll over into your back. “T’you silly.” Harry lets out a scoff as he playfully rolls his eyes as if you could see him making you laugh. “Did you forget about me? I’ve only been gone two days.” You ask with a huff and Harry knows there’s a good possibility you’re pouting and he can’t help but want to laugh because if you only knew how he’s been essentially cyberstalking you since the moment you left the house two days ago, you wouldn’t feel the need to ask him this question.

“You still want to marry me then?” He hears you let out a groan and he smiles to himself because he knows you’re rolling your eyes at him. You always act so annoyed when he asks you this question but he knows you kinda love to hear him need the reassurance that you still want to be his wife in a few months.

“Yes and I even-oh my god I forgot to tell you!” You sit up and Harry hears what he knows is the sound of your slippers padding across the floor as you walk towards the bathroom that’s attached to your bedroom. “We had a brunch thingy and guess what was on the napkins next to the cheese and crackers.” You reach over and grab your drink off the vanity just as Harry is about to answer. “Dicks. Like little tiny cute-”

“Tiny and cute? These are words you use to describe dicks often or just the ones on napkins?” The grin that takes over Harry’s face makes his cheeks hurt as your laugh comes through the phone and he knows it’s the kinda laugh that’s going to leave you with pink cheeks and watery eyes.

“Don’t worry I don’t use those words to describe yours I use-”

“Who the bloody fuck are you talking to?” Harry rolls his eyes at Niall’s loud voice in the background and he knows he only has a few minutes left on the phone with you.

“Uh my lawyer?” Harry bites back a laugh at your sad attempt of a cover up. “He uhm needed my signature on a-a uh prenup thing-thingy.” If Harry was there he’d have the hardest time taking what you just said seriously because your words are slightly slurred and your tone makes it seem like you just asked a question instead of explaining yourself, so he knows Niall is more than likely staring at you with a raised brow and a glare.

“He called you did he?” Niall asks and Harry knows right then that you’re done for. “Babe your lawyer is a woman named Janet.”

“Oh fuck Harry he caught me.” Harry laughs and can only shake his head at your admission, he hears Niall let out a laugh and then hears him tell you something along the lines of hurry up. “I gotta go back to my party.”

“You called me in the middle of your party?”

“I did. I miss you.”

“I miss you too baby. I love you.”

“I love you too but I have to go now before Niall comes back and steals my phone.” Harry knows you’re not kidding, Niall would very much enjoy barging into your room and taking your phone for the remainder of the trip so he just lets out a soft sigh and clears his throat before telling you goodbye and that he loves you one more time before the two of you hang up.

The next two days seem to drag on as Harry does as much as he can to busy himself as an attempt to give himself a break from checking on you via social media every few minutes. Even going as far as inviting Mitch over for an impromptu writing session that lasted a few hours, and while it helped for a bit but as soon as he was waving bye to his friend as he backed out of the driveway Harry couldn’t help but slide his phone out of his back pocket as soon as he was back inside the house. He lets out a sigh as he paces the length of the couch in the living room, chewing on his bottom lip as his thumb hovers over the icon of the app he’s become very familiar with the past several days. Giving into his desires Harry lets his thumb hit the app bringing him to his home page of his Instagram, he pauses his pacing as he places a hand on his hip and looks off towards the kitchen with a raised brow.

“Have I always been clingy like this?” He mumbles to himself as he contemplates going straight to your profile or looking through one of your friend’s first. “No certainly not? It’s because she’s my fiancé now right?” Normally Harry would feel a bit odd talking to himself but at the moment he can’t be bothered because he needs to have some sort of dialogue going in order to help him not feel as clingy and obsessed with you as he begins tapping his way through Emily, one of your bridesmaids instagram story.

“It’s normal to want to see what your fiancé is doing while away and-what was that?” Harry is caught off guard by what he sees on his screen and it’s gone much too quickly for his liking so he simply taps a few times and brings his phone up closer to his face so he can get a better look at the slightly blurry boomerang on Emily’s story.

Now Harry knew that one of the major things planned for this trip was a boat day, it was the main detail that Niall actually let you help him plan because he didn’t want to pick something to do that you’d be miserable with and honestly who doesn’t enjoy a day relaxing in the sun on a giant boat with a few friends? But what Harry didn’t put together in his mind was that with a boat day comes boat attire, which means he wasn’t at all prepared to see a blurry boomerang of you in what appears to be a white and silver bikini with the word “bride” printed in black on the bottoms in a pretty cursive font while you dance around with a drink in your hand and a bedazzled headband that has a mini veil attached to it. He has no shame in admitting he watches the blurry boomerang about ten times before he finally moves on through the rest of Emily’s story, hoping to see more of your outfit but he’s disappointed when he reaches the end and the only other photo he sees of you is just of your hand holding a drink that showcases your engagement ring with the words “blinded by the bling” and while it makes Harry chuckle it’s not exactly what he’s wanting to see, but that’s when he notices someone familiar in the background and instantly goes to her profile.

“Don’t let me down Gem.” He whispers to himself as he goes to his sister’s Instagram and he smiles when he sees she has quite the long story and most of it is for her close friends meaning it’s probably of the trip she’s currently on with you.

His sister being invited to your bachelorette trip wasn’t shocking, the two of you get along great and she’s in the wedding but Harry won’t lie and say he’s not a little jealous that she gets to be around you right now while he’s stuck at home, hell even his mom is going to be there on the last two days so she can celebrate you agreeing to spend forever with her son. So the least Gemma could do in Harry’s opinion is post some shots of you enjoying your boat day in your lovely little bridal bikini.

“Holy shit.” He reaches down and grabs the back of the couch for support as he finally gets exactly what he’s been looking and hoping for. It’s a photo of you laying out on a lounge chair with a grin on your face and the same heart shaped sunglasses on that he saw you wearing a few days ago and the sun is hitting your swimsuit just right causing the silver bits to shine and you have a slice of watermelon in your hand that isn’t holding a drink and Gem has written “The Watermelon Sugar Bride” and included the song in the background of the story as well. Harry taps through his sister’s story and smiles when he gets to a video of the two of you singing along to one of his songs until you spot Niall and Tammy in the background making funny faces making you tell them to fuck off resulting in Gem saying “excuse me! This is a family show.” And without missing a beat you turn to face her camera and wiggle your eyebrows as you go “or is it?”

“That’s my future wife right there.” Is all Harry says with a grin as he goes through the rest of Gem’s story laughing at the random photos of Niall who constantly looks a little worried as he’s looking at you or one of the girls. He decides to go to Niall’s profile to see what he’s posted recently and he laughs at the captions before liking them.

It feels as if you’ve been gone for months when really you’ve been gone for five days but Harry can’t hardly contain the excitement he feels knowing you’ll be home tomorrow. He knows you’ve had a great time and really enjoyed yourself, his mom FaceTimed him last night while at dinner so he could see everyone and you looked almost like you were glowing with how adored Harry knew you felt in that moment. You had a smile on your face and a certain sparkle in your eyes that made Harry’s heart swell because you just looked so happy, and since you were coming home tomorrow Niall wasn’t as strict with his rules on communication so it didn’t shock Harry at all when he saw your name flash across his phone screen while he was making coffee.

“Good morning sweetheart.” He says with a smile as he reaches for the sugar next to the coffee maker. He hears you let out a little yawn letting him know you’re probably still tucked in bed, he puts you on speaker so he can spoon some sugar into his mug and stir it in without having to mess with holding the phone up to his ear.

“I can practically smell the coffee through the phone and it’s rude.” You whine making Harry chuckle as he brings the mug up to his lips to take a sip to see if it needs anything else.

“Where’s that bestie of yours hmm? Isn’t he on coffee duty while I’m not around?” He asks after taking another sip and he hears you let out a groan as you roll over to your back.

“He’s so bad at making coffee.”

“I beg your pardon? I make it how a normal human is s’posed to drink it you caffeine goblin.”

“No you make it all watered down and-”

“Watered down? I add two scoops for every four cups of water that’s the proper way to make it.” Harry just goes about his business and pops a bagel into the toaster as you and Niall argue over the right way to make coffee, it doesn’t shock Harry that Niall is with you in bed at such an hour because he’s always been an early riser so of course he’s going to go to your room for some morning cuddles before everyone else wakes up especially since Amelia sadly wasn’t able to stay the whole trip and had to leave a few days early he doesn’t like having an empty bed.

“I’m the bride Niall you’re supposed to just make it how I like it.” Harry raises a brow at your statement and not even a second passes before you’re in a fit of laughter and he can’t help but just shake his head because he knew you weren’t being serious.

“Harry you ready to have her back mate?” Niall asks as he takes the phone from you and Harry just smiles to himself as he takes the bagel from the toaster and puts it on his plate. “Because I’m ready to be rid of her.”

“Oh please you’re going to miss me the moment you drop me off at home and you know it.” Harry laughs at your accusation because if Niall is anything like him then it’s true, he’s going to miss you the moment you’re away from him especially after spending so much time with you on this trip.

“I’m very ready to have her back yes.” Harry answers as he picks up the phone after taking it off speaker. “I’m never letting her go on a trip without me again.” He teases making Niall laugh while he hears you mumble something about him being clingy.

“Well I gotta go make some shit coffee so here’s your missus but make it snappy yeah? We have plans for today.” With that Niall gives you back your phone and Harry hears the sound of a door open and close letting him know you’re alone in your room now.

“I get to see your face tomorrow and I think I might cry because I really have missed you so much and I don’t know why but this trip just-it just made it all feel so real? We get married in just a few months as in you’re going to be my husband and I’m going to really be your wife.” Harry does his best to hold back his emotions as your words hit him, he had a feeling that this trip was going to be a big deal for you because just a few weeks prior you had found your dress and had your first bridal moment so being surrounded by your friends and loved ones all celebrating the fact you’re a bride to be he knew was just going to be a lot. “You really love me enough to want to be with me forever.” He clears his throat and blinks a few times to help get himself in order before he can respond.

“I love you so much that I don’t think forever is actually long enough but it’s a start.” He knows you just rolled your eyes at how corny he sounds but he also knows your cheeks are pink and you have a smile on your face because you love it when he says things like that to you. “I can’t wait to be able to call you my wife. And honestly baby I’ve missed you so much I’ve been stalking you on Instagram all week and I’m probably going to cry the moment I see you get out of Niall’s car because I can’t help it.” He admits with a sigh as he runs a hand through his hair and he smiles when he hears you let out a small chuckle.

“You’re like obsessed with me aren’t you?” You ask with a slight tease to your voice but Harry just shrugs as he grabs his coffee mug and brings it up to his lips.

“Just a little bit.” He answers without hesitation making you smile because even though you don’t say it, both of you know you’re just as obsessed with him.

[harrysfolklore]

love on tour, forever - blurb

i watched harry’s video and got super inspired to write this, it’s definitely one of my favorite things i’ve done so i hope you like it 🥺

ALL GIFS ARE BY @delicatepointofview FOLLOW THEM FOR THE BEST GIFS EVER <33

MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

“Do you think I should pack this?” you asked holding a video camera up, catching Harry’s attention.

“That would be great, love,” he said from the bed, watching you add the final items to your suitcase, “That way you can film me while I shower for when we’re apart.”

“Oh shut up,” you rolled your eyes with affection and he smirked, “I’m filming special moments with this, you know, backstage moments your photographers don’t always catch.”

“Bummer,” he shrugged, making you roll your eyes at him again, “I’m just kidding love, that is a very lovely idea.”

“It’s settled then.” You smiled at him and put the camera in your suitcase, knowing that by the end of the tour, it would be filled with the most special and heartfelt moments.

“What are you doing down there, lovie?”

“Making sure I get all of your angles,” you shrugged, focused on your video camera, “Here’s the rockstar, getting his steps in before hitting the stage.”

He let out a laugh before you could catch a flash of mischief in his eyes, “You know, there’s another way I could get my cardio in.”

“Stop it, you’re on camera,” you held your finger up and gave him warning eyes, you were planing on showing this videos to his mom who couldn’t be with him all the time, and the last thing you wanted was her knowing abouthis shenanigans, “How are you feeling, nervous about tonight’s performance?”

“I feel good,” he said truthfully, “I’m excited to see everyone and sing our songs, but most importantly I’m excited to wear sparkly gear again.”

“There he is, there he is,” you couldn’t help but shake your head and smile, “I’m going to film the real stars of the show, Mitch and Sarah, so say bye.”

“Bye YN’s camera! Such a shame you’re not catching my post workout shower!”

“It’s negative!” Nyoh said as she entered the room, making everyone cheer and clap.

“We’re not sick! That deserves a happy dance!” Harry said as he stood up and danced goofily around the room, making everyone laugh at him.

Looking at your camera sitting at the table, you decided it was a golden moment you couldn’t afford to miss.

“Okay Ny-ny, could you hold your test up so everyone knows why this man-child is dancing like a fool,” Nyoh showed her test to the camera, laughing as you moved it to show Harry who kept on dancing, “Sometimes I don’t know if I’m dating an adult or a five year old.”

“Come on lovie, dance with me!” he approached you, holding his hand out, “If you don’t I’m going to be sad” he said in a dramatic voice, and you passed your camera to Sarah who was sitting next to you, getting her to film the both of you.

“I want to kiss you right now but we can’t take off our masks,” Harry said before a minute of jumping around, “Easy tiger, we’ll be alone soon.”

“Rehearsal time!” you said cheerfully, filming everyone on stage, “Here’s Sarah, Mitch, Pauli, Niji, Ny,” they all waved as you mentioned their names, “And there’s a dude called Harry who claims to be the headliner of the show, no one knows him tho.”

“Come on woman,” Harry gave you an annoyed playful look, “You know me, very well. Actually you know parts of my body that-“

“Harry! What’s with you and your horny comments all the time, you’re like a teenager!” you shook your head, all of his bandmates laughing at your banter.

“Can you blame me? I go home to you every night, I’m a lucky bastard.”

“That you are!” Pauli chimed in, making everyone laugh again.

The band continued rehearsing, you standing in a corner and catching some moments on video. Once they were done with Canyon Moon, Harry called for you.

“So, love. What do you think? Do we sound good.” Harry asked, looking at your with happy eyes, aware that you were still getting it all on camera.

“If by we you mean your band, they sound amazing as always. If you’re included in that ‘we’ then I don’t know, you should practice some more”.

Harry threw his head back in laughter, grabbing the hem of his shirt with one hand and his mic with the other, “Why are you sassy with me today! What have I done?”

You only shrugged and laughed along with him, getting on your tiptoes and kissing his cheek softly.

“Practice some more, I said!”

“Aren’t you the cutest little thing ever?” you cooed at the baby in your lap, Mitch and Sarah asked you to watch their son while they run something with the rest of the band and you were more than happy to do it, “You’re the sweetest boy I know!”

“I thought I was the sweetest boy you knew!” Harry’s voice made its way to you ears, he entered the room accompanied by Mitch and Sarah, the baby instantly making grabby hands at his mom.

“You’re not a boy anymore, you’re basically pushing 30!”

“Don’t remind me!” he dramatically said, “I’m still young and full of life.”

The four of you laughed, Sarah moving to sit next to you and Mitch and Harry hanging out by the door.

“Did he give you any trouble?” Sarah asked, looking down at her son, “He just learned how to walk without any help do he could be a handful sometimes.”

“Not at all, he’s the easiest baby ever.” You smiled at them tenderly.

“He’s not only obsessed with walking, he’s obsessed with dancing too.” Mitch said before taking a sip out of his wine glass, he’s never without one.

“Oh! I didn’t know that!” Harry said excitedly, “Baby, dance for us!”

Sarah put him down and Harry tried to make a melody by hitting the wall and mumbling random stuff, the boy instantly moving his body in an adorable way that made everyone laugh and awe at him.

Harry noticed that you had grabbed your camera to film the moment and he spoke directly to it, “That’s it! We have Love On Tour’s official dancer”

“Here’s the boss man, with his brand new Love On Tour jacket,” you filmed Harry, who was posing by the door showing off his new clothing, “I have my own too, with my name on it and all,” you turned the camera around to show yours briefly before turning it to Harry again, “Anything you would like to say?”

“It’s show time, baby!” he bobbed his head, making the sunglasses who were resting on his head fall to his eyes.

You burst out laughing and so did he after a minute of holding his straight face, “You’re such a dork!”

“But you love me a lot!”

“Eu te amo, Brasil!” Harry yelled to the empty stadium after sound-checking Lights Up.

“As you can see, he’s excited to be here,” you zoomed in on him with your camera, “We love this country so much.”

“We do, we do,” Harry agreed, “I’m putting on my best dance clothes and shoes tonight, this show is going to be massive!”

“You’re a dancer now?” you asked to piss him off.

“Of course! Look at my moves.” He grabbed his mic with one hand, putting the other on his hip and moving funnily.

“Look at that! You’re going straight to Dancing with the Stars after this tour.”

“I’m more of a Dancing Moms kinda guy.” He shrugged, making everyone laugh before moving on with the next song to rehearse.

“There it is, the 10th tweet about how they’re going to the show for Lloyd only.” You giggled, scrolling down your timeline while Harry watched over your shoulders.

“Okay, that’s it,” he said before standing up, “Lloyd Wakefield !” at this, the photographer turned his head around, previously in a conversation with Madi and some other crew members.

“Yes?” Lloyd asked in a confused tone, you stood back and grabbed your camera, knowing a funny moment you would love to remember was coming.

“I might have to fire you,” Harry said, his voice trying to sound serious but his eyes gave him away, “You’re stealing the show and I can’t accept that.”

Lloyd rolled his eyes and everyone in the room turned their attention to them with grins on their faces, they were used to Harry’s humor.

“Yeah? And who’s going to be your photographer now?”

“Or we could solve this like manly man, with a fight.”

“As if you would fight anyone!” you chimed in from your place, making them turn your attention to you.

“Is that my own girlfriend doubting me?” he said, faking an offended tone, “Bring it in, Wakefield”

Lloyd laughed but played along, bringing his arms up and playfully challenging Harry, but somehow they ended up putting their hands together and moving them back and forth.

“Look at the manly man, fighting for who’s the star of the show,” you said, your camera focusing on them, “Just another day on the road.”

“I don’t know what we’re doing but I’m winning!” Harry chirped and everyone laughed again.

“Harry! Harry! Harry!”

Was all that was heard backstage at Reggio Emilia RFC Arena, some people holding up champagne glasses and jumping up and down.

“We did it!” Harry yelled as he placed himself in the center of the room, his vest long forgotten, jumping and twirling along with the cheers.

As usual, you were holding your camera, filming the special you knew he would want to replay over and over again.

“Congratulations baby, another world tour completed!” you said to him, “Any final words you would like to say to the camera.”

Harry paused to think for a few seconds before speaking, “I love you, that’s all,” she shook his head almost in disbelief, “You have been here for every step of the way, and that means the world to me, none of this would be possible without you.”

“Awe! Aren’t you a softie?” Jeff cheered, throwing his arm around his shoulders and ruffling his hair playfully.

“I’m just in love.” He winked at the camera and that was your cue to turn it off and take in the moment.

For three years, Love On Tour ruled the world and changed yours, giving you the opportunity to be by Harry’s side for every milestone and special moment.

The tour might had come to an end, but the memories created around it would last forever.

And you were glad you got them all on camera.

taglist: @lightsoutstyles @willowpains @straightontilmornin @sleutherclaw @gimsaysay @hazzassmirk @platinumbarbie143 @musicforcinemas @celesteblack08 @scntfrhs @eleanordaisy @lomlolivia @iceebabies @iloveshawn @be-with-me-so-happily @watermelonsugacry @rayisthehoe

[monzabee]

🪩 || bee's masterlist

AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM THE AUTHOR!

welcome to my masterlist! you can find all of my works as of now under the cut, and here's a masterlist key to help you navigate your way through!

masterlist key: — social media au - ✧ — fic - ✶ — drabbles - ✫ — headcanons - ᕯ

MAX VERSTAPPEN (MV1)

fuck being underrated ✧ : the one where Max is dating his team principal's daugther, who happens to be the hottest model of the year.

third time's the charm ✧ : the one where you are there to celebrate Max winning his third title, and the whole world is there to witness it.

two sides of the same coin ✶ : the one where you try to convince yourself that you're not falling for your teammate, but can't help it when you realise that he is not that different from you after all.

beach read ✶ : the one where you and Max go on a holiday for the first time, and you realize just how much you love 'Vacation Max'.

viva las vegas (+18) ✶ : the one where you and Max celebrate his win in a way you’ve never done before. [minors dni!]

prison for life ✶ : the one where if anybody hurts you, Max is going to prison for life.

CHARLES LECLERC (CL16)

how you get the girl ✶ : the one where you and your boyfriend Charles attend a gala for a friend and run into Harry Styles – who happens to be your ex.

in my lover era! ✧ : the one where Charles becomes a Swiftie because of his girlfriend.

like real people do (+18) ✶ : the one where you are having sex with your boyfriend, Charles, for the first time but he wants everything to be perfect for you. [minors dni!]

you'll change your name or change your mind ✶ : the one where you find your way back home, even if the journey takes longer than you think.

this is a relationship, that i don't think anyone saw coming ✶ : the one where you and Charles think you are successfully fooling everyone on the grid, when in reality you are the ones being fooled.

the name game ✶ : the one where you and Charles try to get through one of the first hardships of parenthood.

lean on you ✶ : the one where you learn to lean on Charles more than you thought you ever could.

red, white, blue's in the sky ✧ : the one where Charles has an olympian girlfriend.

T.G.I.F ✶ : the one where writing your thesis is harder than you think, but Charles is here to help you through all of it.

pon de replay (+18) ✶ : the one where Charles decide to prove to everyone that it is him that you belong to, and only him. [minors dni!]

the smallest man who ever lived ✶ : the one where you’re thrown into a conundrum when you learn the news of your husband, Charles’, infidelity.

you can check out the rest of the series from here!

DANIEL RICCIARDO (DR3)

nonesense ✧ : the one where you and Daniel fall in love with a song, so you must share it with the whole internet.

girl crush ✶ : the one where both you and Daniel meet your celebrity crushes in the course of a weekend, and decide to give it a go.

you can check out the rest of the series from here!

redbull gives you wings ✧ : the one where red bull brings together people, again..

LANDO NORRIS (LN4)

good riddance ✧ : the one where internet discovers that Lando's girlfriend is a singer, who happens to be on a world tour.

short stack ✧ : the one where the internet is obsessed about the height difference between you and your boyfriend, Lando.

déjà vu (beyoncé’s version) ✶ : the one where a bad prank leads to you and Lando exploring an option you thought was not an option.

bad idea right? ✶ : the one where seeing Lando tonight is a bad idea, right?

greedy ✧ : the one where lando finds a certain singer cute.

diet pepsi (+18) ✶ : the one where you and Lando have a rather interesting way of resolving an argument. [minors dni!]

MICK SCHUMACHER (MS47)

a vettel and a schumacher walk into a bar ✶ : the one where Mick is dating Seb's eldest daughter, but forgets to mention this to his mentor and close friend. another problem? he can't seem to keep his eyes (or his hands) off of you.

you can check out the rest of the series from here!

heartbreak hotel ✧ : the one where you run into your ex, Mick, at Las Vegas, and chaos ensues.

ARTHUR LECLERC (AL12)

baby honey ✶ : the one where Arthur swear he's not thinking about you, his best friend, all the time – just today, yesterday, and tomorrow night.

LEWIS HAMILTON (LH44)

eight words when i think about us (+18) ✶ : the one where Coachella has both you and Lewis high on each other. [minors dni!]

he's a genius ('cause he loves a woman like her) ✧ : the one where you and Lewis (attempt to) soft launch your relationship.

hot girls support 44 ✫ : the one where your husband realises that you are, indeed, his number one fan.

what you do to me (+18) ✶ : the one where Lewis returns home to you – the one thing he desperately wants, but won't let himself have completely. [minors dni!]

partition (+18) ✶ : the one where you and Lewis are stuck in traffic in Paris, and decide to make the most of the situation. [minors dni!]

bom dia! ✧ : the one where Lewis decides to spend some time in Brazil during winter break with a special someone.

run for the hills (+18) ✶ : the one where fate decides to bring you back into Lewis’ life, making him question his belief in fate. [minors dni!]

PIERRE GASLY (PG10)

feather ✶ : the one where Pierre is the one left mourning after your relationship ends.

all around the world (pretty girls) ✧ : the one where the internet finds out about you and Pierre's relationship.

CARLOS SAINZ (CS55)

the lusty month of may (+18) ✶ : the one where it's that darling month when everyone throws self-control away, and you and Carlos decide to do a wretched thing – or two. [minors dni!]

mr.big ✧ : the one where there he was, wearing armani on a sunday, your boyfriend, Carlos.

you can check out the rest of the series from here!

OSCAR PIASTRI (OP81)

short n' sweet ✧ : the one where in an attempt to figure out who Y/N is dating, the internet come up with theories only to realise she is dating none other than Oscar Piastri and chaos ensues.

LANCE STROLL (LS18)

kiss it better ✶: the one where a crazy idea turns out to be the best possible thing for you and Lance.

©𝗆𝗈𝗇𝗓𝖺𝖻𝖾𝖾 𝟤𝟢𝟤𝟥. 𝗉𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗈𝖿 𝗆𝗒 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄𝗌 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝗍𝖾𝖼𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗎𝗇𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝖼𝗈𝗉𝗒𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝖺𝗏𝖺𝗂𝗅𝖺𝖻𝗅𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖼𝗈𝗉𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗈𝗋 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗉𝗅𝖺𝗍𝖿𝗈𝗋𝗆𝗌.

[merrybloomwrites]

I'm Sorry If I Say I Need You (One Direction x Reader - Kidnapped)

Summary: You always thought that getting put into a band with 5 boys would be the craziest thing to happen to you. And then you and those 5 boys all get kidnapped and held hostage. After years of being seen as the strong one, will this experience be the one to break you? Or will the support of your bandmembers be enough to save you?

CW: kidnapping, physical violence, mentions of weapons, inappropriate/unwanted touches, manipulation, gaslighting, injuries (Blood, bruising), hospitals

WC: 6K

AN: Please read the tags, as this is a heavy & violent story. I try not to go in depth with those scenes, focusing instead on the interactions between reader and the boys, but I do include some of the violent parts. Don't read if this makes you uncomfortable, I totally get this isn't for everyone and I understand not wanting to read this.

Also I have Paul Higgins playing a role in this. If you don't know how he is, he was the head of security back in the 1D days and the boys called him their dad on tour.

Back when I was doing whumptober I had a random thought about that "Kidnapped by 1D" trope that's been around forever. I thought about reversing it so it's reader kidnapping them instead. And then decided to write a legit story where reader is also a member of the band and they all get taken together. I'd been seeing a lot of different whump tropes and wanted to test myself and write a story with some aspects I'd never done before. This is the result! It is, of course, filled with the boys being protective and comforting and so there's plenty of that mixed in with the whump!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Growing up as the only girl with five older brothers had definitely shaped you. You were strong, tough, sure of yourself. You didn’t put up with any nonsense. You never showed fear, or pain, or weakness. 

All of your brothers were athletic, and you’d spent so much time watching different sporting events. And while you played a number of sports as well, you didn’t excel the same way they did. So you decided to follow a different path.

That path led you to audition for the X Factor. You had big dreams of becoming a famous singer and getting away from the shadow of your brothers. 

And then ironically, you’d somehow been put in a band with five older boys. Well, you were only a couple months younger than Harry, but still. You couldn’t believe your luck. It was somehow good, since you hadn’t been turned away, and simultaneously bad, since you once again had to find a way to stand out from a group of boys.

But you quickly learned that Niall, Liam, Harry, Zayn, and Louis were nothing like your brothers. Sure they were energetic and crazy like them, but they were so different when it came to you. Instead of teasing you and ignoring you because you were young, or because you were a girl, they would support you, compliment you, protect you. 

It was nice, but also a little strange. You didn’t know how to accept all of this, so you put up a wall. While you were friends with the others, you kept a bit of distance. They had a way of trying to almost coddle you, and you refused to let that happen. You were just as strong and confident as them. You didn’t need any special treatment.

This is how it started, and how it stayed. You’re now three years into being One Direction, and the boys have learned how to behave around you. Group hugs and high fives are allowed, but other than that, they didn’t enter your personal space. They’d give you compliments but make sure not to go over the top. And even though their instincts had them anxious to protect you when out in public, to put a barrier between you and the paps or the fans, they knew better, and allowed you to walk solo just like they did. 

It made you feel respected, knowing that they were listening to your boundaries even when it felt wrong to them. And you knew that if you let them get closer or treat you differently than they treated each other, you’d be seen as weaker by the public. So keeping up these walls was necessary for your success.

But on late, lonely travel nights, you find yourself wishing you could let them in. Sometimes you do feel weak, or tired, or not good enough. And you wish you could go to them for comfort. On a number of occasions you almost do, but then they make some comment about how well you handle everything and how they wish they could be strong like you, and you hold back once again. 

That is, until the six of you find yourselves in a situation that pushes you towards your breaking point.

You’re halfway through a leg of tour when some sort of illness travels through your crew. Somehow none of the onstage performers get it, and it seems to be hitting your security team the hardest. On this night in particular, every normal security guard calls out sick and you end up with a group of complete strangers.

It’s weird, but none of you question it, as it seems like the only option at this point. And when the show ends and you’re loading into the van, you’re all too tired to worry about it anyway. You figure they must be safe if management hired them to protect their biggest source of income. 

You're in the middle of the back row, squished between Liam and Niall. Your eyes are heavy, and the motion of the car is soothing, nearly putting you to sleep. 

But then Liam turns and asks, “Does this look at all like the way we came?”

You shrug and say, “I haven’t been paying attention,” and Niall adds, “It’s dark, how are you seeing anything out there?”

“I can see enough to know I’ve never seen this before,” Liam responds. 

“Maybe it’s just a different route,” you say. 

“Could be,” he concedes. It’s quiet again in the car, but as the drive goes on you can sense Liam’s growing agitation. 

“It shouldn’t be taking this long,” he suddenly says into the quiet van. His anxiety is rubbing off on you and you lean over him to look out the window. You still can’t see much. 

But looking inside the vehicle you begin to notice something. The six security guards all look agitated by the conversation. You start to think that maybe something is wrong, that these strangers may be up to something. 

And sure enough, after another minute they turn down a road and begin to floor it. There’s commotion, all of you shouting out to slow down, but then one of the men turns around and holds out a gun. 

“You belong to us now. Shut up, and sit still. When we get to the house you’ll calmly walk inside. Put up a fight and we'll shoot. We have more people waiting at the house, all armed, so we have the upper hand. Got it?”

All six of you manage to nod, though you’re all practically frozen from fear. Niall and Liam each move to grab your hands, and normally you’d shift away, but you can tell they need this more than you do right now. 

The car jolts to a stop, causing you all to slam into the seats in front of you, and you’re all a bit disoriented as you’re taken from the van to the basement of a large house. 

It’s straight out of a thriller movie. Concrete floor and walls illuminated by a single hanging light bulb. Dirty mattress in the corner. Various scary looking objects that you don’t want to know the uses of. 

“This is where we have fun,” says one of the men. There are twelve in total. And as promised, each of them carries at least one weapon. 

“You’ll stay in there,” says another man as he opens a door in the corner of the room. The six of you are pushed inside of a small, carpeted but otherwise bare room, barely big enough for all of you to be able to lay down at once. There’s another door off this room that leads to a bathroom. It’s dirty and smelly but at least you’ll have a private place to pee. 

One thing that’s clear, there’s no way out. 

“You’ll stay in here until we come for you. Oh, and if any of you does any funny business, steps a toe out of line or fights back, she gets it,” says one of the men emphatically as he points at you with his gun. 

The message is clear. And smart. Your band members will do anything to protect you. There’s no way they’ll do something that will put you in danger. Just like that, these kidnappers have prevented any pushback from your group. Not that there seems to be anything you all can do, being outnumbered and unarmed. 

It’s truly a nightmare of a situation. And somehow it’s happening to you. 

“We’ll be back soon,” he says before closing and locking the door. 

The six of you stand there for a moment, utterly baffled and terrified. 

“You okay?” Zayn says, and you look up to see him turned towards you. 

Repressing an eye roll you respond, “Of course not. None of us are. We literally got kidnapped and taken to a friggen house of horrors.” 

“Yea, but he didn’t threaten any of our lives,” Louis adds. 

“Pretty sure all of our lives are in danger,” you reply. “We’re being held captive by psychopaths. I don’t think any of us are safe.”

You sit on the floor, tucking your head between your knees. The others follow, and the six of you sit in silence, all trying to think of a way out of this mess. 

Being left there alone is unnerving, but what’s even worse is when one of the men comes back. He scans the room as all of you silently and fearfully watch him. 

“You,” he finally says, pointing to Niall. “You’re up first.” The man leans down, grabbing Niall and roughly pulling him up. Before anyone can even react, Niall is thrown into the other part of the basement and the door is shut and locked once more. 

While the door muffles the sound, you can all still hear the noises of impacts followed by Niall’s cries of pain. Your imagination runs wild with images of what they might be doing to him. 

After a few minutes the door opens and Niall is shoved back inside before two men grab Zayn. They bring him out, and once again the rest of you are forced to listen as they hurt your friend. Meanwhile Liam checks Niall and comforts him. 

The pattern continues, and each time one of the guys is returned, another is taken. Louis is the last of the boys, and you know it’s your turn next. 

But then Louis is pushed back in, and the man closes and locks it. You’re confused, unsure why they didn’t take you. 

The boys are hurt, but nothing too bad. A couple bruises, a few small scratches, but it could’ve been worse. 

Just when you think you might get away unharmed, the door opens again. “Your turn,” says the man as he looks at you, a disturbing smile on his face. 

You see the boys move to block you but you subtly shake your head and stand up and walk towards the door, accepting your fate. 

“Good girl,” he says, causing you to shiver in disgust. Once out of the small room, you’re thrown to the concrete floor and all twelve men surround you. 

There’s a kick to your back and it knocks the air out of you. And you gasp for breath, another kick lands on your stomach. You’re pulled up, held in the air by two men as others take their turns hitting you. 

Suddenly they stop, the men dropping you and you land harshly on the floor. Finally you can catch your breath, but you warily watch the men, waiting for another blow. 

It doesn’t come. Instead, the man in charge crouches in front of you, causing you to recoil, but he grabs you by the hair to keep your face close to his. 

“You’re the one we want,” he says. You stare at him in confusion. “We didn’t want the boys. But it was impossible to get you alone. Oddly enough it was easier to take all of you. But just know, they are in this mess because of you. So you’d better behave.”

With that he lifts you up and pushes you back into the small room. Immediately after the door closes, the boys surround you, trying to ask if you’re okay, but you put up your hands, alerting them not to touch you. They give you space and you tell them you’re fine, and while they know that’s not true, they also know not to press you to talk. 

You sit in a corner of the room holding your head in your hands. You hear the others talk but your mind is too busy to listen to them. 

After some time they all lay down to sleep, but guilt keeps you awake. You notice the way they’re all comforting each other, even as they sleep. Liam and Harry are laying together while Louis is holding both Zayn and Niall. 

You wish you could curl up with them, get comfort from them, but that would be selfish. 

They’re in this mess because of you. They’re hurting and it’s all your fault. So no, you don’t deserve to be held. You deserve to suffer. 

Eventually you fall asleep only to be woken a couple hours later by the door slamming open. Water bottles and granola bars are tossed in the room and the door shuts once more. 

“Guess breakfast is here,” Louis says. It’s not much, but at least you won’t starve or dehydrate. 

All six of you eat in silence, and as soon as you’re done the door opens. Liam is taken first this time, and the pattern from last night continues. You’re all taken three times throughout the day, after every meager meal that you’re given. 

You’re always last. The order of the boys switches up, seems random. But you’re always saved to be the final person. After lunch you’re told it’s so that you can see the pain your bandmates are experiencing because of you. 

It keeps you docile, willing to take whatever beating they give you. 

Which is more than they give the boys. You’ve noticed that when the others come back they only have one or two new injuries each time. Just enough to keep them in line. They boys have also mentioned it’s only two guys there each time they’re taken. 

For you, it’s always the full dozen. And they all take turns. It feels like every inch of your body is covered in bruises. 

But you make sure not to let the boys see. They tend to one another, make sure they’re all eating, and hold each other whenever someone needs comfort. 

As you’re reminded each time the men have you in their grasp, you don’t deserve that comfort. The pain your friends are feeling is your fault. 

The men never explain why they want you, just that they need to have you. It had been their goal for years, getting you in their grasp. 

Another fitful night of sleep passes followed by another nightmare and pain filled day. There is however an obvious shift on that second full day. While you’re all once again taken three times, the boys are brought back after only a few minutes. Their time with the men dwindles, and yours gets longer. 

That evening they take you for nearly two full hours. You know what they want. They’re searching for your breaking point. You refuse to let them find it. They give up out of sheer frustration and throw you back in the room. 

No matter what you’d experienced the last few days, you always landed on your feet. 

Until now. 

You stumble, falling into Zayn. He catches you and gently lays you on the ground. He goes to pull away, knowing you don’t like to be touched, but you grip his shirt in your fists. 

Zayn looks at you questioningly and you murmur, “Stay. Don’t let me go.”

“I won’t, I’ve got you,” he replies. He turns to Liam next to him and says, “Help me get her settled. I don’t want to hurt her.”

“Of course, what do you need?” Liam says, altering you to his presence beside you. One of your hands releases Zayn and instead reaches out for Liam. 

“Do you want us to lay down with you?” Liam asks. 

A weak nod is all you can manage, but it’s enough. Zayn settles on one side of you with Liam on the other. 

Louis kneels by your head, and you look at his upside down face hovering above you. “Can we check your injuries, love? Please?” 

You can hear the concern in his voice so you nod once more. Giving them permission to see the extent of the beatings you’ve taken is the last thing you want to do. 

But you’re exhausted. And scared. And in so much pain. 

It’s time to take the wall down. It’s time to let them in, let them take care of you. 

Louis starts with what’s visible on your face. There isn’t much there, but he wipes away the bit of blood on your cheek. 

“Can Harry lift your shirt to check your belly?” Louis asks and you nod again. 

You hear a chorus of gasps as your shirt is moved. You don’t need to look to know it’s not a pretty sight. 

“This isn’t good,” Harry says quietly. His hand brushes one of the bruises and you cry out in pain. 

“Sorry, I’m sorry. Y/N, this is bad. Like, I think you have internal injuries,” Harry states. 

“Who made you a doctor?” You quip weakly. 

“Don’t need to be one to know a serious injury,” Niall says. “What have they done to you?” His voice is laced with horror and sadness, and you start to zone out. You know you’ve taken a beating, can feel it all over. But hearing the boy's reactions to it is even worse. Makes it more real. 

Harry and Niall continue to check your body, wiping any blood they see and pressing cool water bottles to some of the worst bruises. But you don’t react anymore, choosing instead to turn your head and tuck into Liam.

Louis pets through your hair gently and Zayn holds your hand, rubbing soothing circles with his thumb. You focus on these touches and drift off to sleep. 

You startle awake the next morning, and the first thing you notice is that you’re surrounded by the boys. It makes you feel warm, safe. 

And then you realize who else is in the room. 

“This looks cozy,” says the man. You still don’t know their names, but you do know their temperaments. This one doesn’t hit as hard physically, but he knows how to attack you emotionally. “So sweet of them to comfort you, Y/N. Especially considering why you’re all here.”

It’s a brutal reminder, one the others don’t understand but you do. The guilt sets back in, and you do your best to move away from the boys. You don’t deserve to be taken care of, and last night's moment of weakness can’t happen again. 

“Actually, why don’t we have a little chat, make sure you remember the details of the situation,” he adds. 

“Y/N, what is he talking about?” Liam asks, but you play dumb, giving a confused shrug in reply. 

“Good act,” the man says. “Let’s go,” he adds as he moves in to grab you. The boys move to block him, but you go around them. Maybe letting the men hurt you will ease the guilt of putting your friends in this situation. You feel even worse after showing such weakness last night. 

So you follow the man, bracing yourself for the hours of pain you’re about to endure. 

But what happens next is worse than you can imagine. There’s no pain, they don’t hit or punch or kick this time. They don’t even throw you to the ground like usual. They’re gentle. Sure, it’s not painful. But the feeling of their hands dragging along every part of your body practically burns you. Makes you want to vomit, right on them. If you do, maybe they’ll stop. Maybe they won’t keep touching you in places no one should be. 

Before you can do that, they all back away. “We’re thinking of letting the others go,” one of the men says. It takes you a minute to comprehend that he’s talking, and when you finally understand, you look at him in confusion. “That got your attention huh?”

“What are you talking about?” you ask.

“We really only wanted you, remember? We have another house. We’ll be taking you there tonight. The other five will be left behind. We’ll send a message to your security tomorrow so they can come rescue them. You will be long gone when that happens. Isn’t that nice, though? Your friends will be okay. You should be happy, they’re in this mess because of you. And now they’ll be free. Don’t you want that?”

Knowing they want an answer, you nod curtly. And you do want the boys to be free, to be safe. But they’ve been a comfort to you these past days, and the selfish part of you wants them to stay. You can endure what these horrible men throw at you because you have a safe place to return to, even if it is a tiny, gross room. At least you have friends with you.

But you can’t think like that. If they have a way out, of course they need to take it. Even if it means you’ll never get away. That these horrible people will be able to continue doing whatever they want to you. That will be your punishment for endangering your friends. 

“Enjoy the day with them,” says the man as he begins leading you back to the room. “It’s the last time you’ll ever see them.” With that he opens the door and guides you inside before leaving you alone with the others. 

They’re quickly at your side, obviously wanting to comfort you like they had the night before, but you hold out your hands, indicating you want space. 

“Y/N,” Niall starts, “Please let us help with your new injuries.”

“I don’t have any,” you reply.

“What do you mean?” Harry asks.

“They didn’t touch you this time?” Louis says next.

“I didn’t say that,” you state sardonically. 

“I don’t understand,” Zayn adds.

It’s quiet for a moment as you take a deep breath. Finally you look up, your eyes meeting Liam’s. It’s clear the second he understands what happens, his gentle, worried expression shifting to anger.

“I’m going to fucking kill them,” he exclaims, startling all of you.

“What the fuck just happened?” Niall asks.

“They touched her,” Liam says, his voice practically a growl. This time the rest do understand, horror, anger, and pity on their faces. Harry and Zayn move closer, obviously wanting to comfort you, but you cannot have that right now. “Please, don’t,” you say and they all step back further, giving you space.

Louis grows more agitated, walking to the door and saying, “Liam has the right idea, they can’t fucking get away with this.” He grabs the door handle forcefully, fully expecting it to be locked like normal, and gets thrown back when it simply opens. 

The six of you stand there, shocked and confused, and Louis slowly and carefully closes the door again. 

“The moron forgot to lock it?” Niall asks.

“Seems so,” Liam replies. 

“Was anyone out there?” Harry asks.

Louis silently peeks out again, confirming the basement is in fact empty. 

“There’s a window,” Liam says. “They opened it one time when I was with them. Guys, it’s a way out.”

“And then what?” Zayn asks. 

“Then we fucking run for our lives, that’s what,” Louis says.

“They have guns, Lou. What if they’re out there waiting for us?” Harry adds.

“At this point we have to take the risk. We’ve been here for days. What if they never let us go? What if no one finds us? We have no other way out,” Louis answers.

“Yes you do,” you interject.

They all look at you questioningly. You take a deep breath, knowing you need to tell them the truth. That way they won’t risk their lives on this insane break out plan. “It’s my fault you’re all here. They didn’t want you. Just me. But they couldn’t get me alone so they took all of us. Tonight they’re taking me to another location, and tomorrow they’ll tell security where you are and you’ll be rescued. You have a way out, please don’t get hurt now.”

There’s another moment of silence while they process this information. 

“Right, okay, we’re going. Now.” Harry says.

“Didn’t you hear me? You’ll be safe!” 

“Do you think we can just leave you with them?” Liam asks. “No way. We’re all going or no one is.”

“We’re not leaving you behind. That’s insane,” Niall says. 

“Please don’t be stupid,” you implore them.

“You’re the stupid one if you think we’d go without you,” Louis retorts. 

“This is my fault-”

Zayn cuts you off saying, “Y/N, this is not your fault. I don’t know what those awful people told you, but they are the only ones to blame. You did not do this to us.”

“But they-”

Liam is the one to interject this time, “They are terrible people who do terrible things. For all you know they’re lying to you to manipulate you. They could be lying about letting us go.”

You hadn’t thought of that. When you don’t speak right away Louis takes his chance to explain what little plan he has. 

“We just have to run for it. The window is pretty high. Liam you go first, then Zayn. Harry and I will help Y/N. Harry, you're tallest, you’ll be able to reach the best so you’ll go last. Once we’re free, run. We need to find a person or a house where we can call for help. Everyone got it?”

The rest of you nod. Louis peeks out one more time to make sure the coast is clear, then you all spring into action. The first step of the plan goes shockingly well. You’re all full of adrenaline, and getting through the window without a problem fills you with hope. 

After a few minutes of running you start thinking you might actually be in the clear. 

The adrenaline wears off. 

And the full pain of your injuries comes back. 

Running becomes harder, every inhale burning not only your lungs but your whole torso. There’s blood soaking your clothes, and you have no idea if you’ve exacerbated a previous injury or gotten a new one. 

You gasp, stumbling and nearly falling to the ground. Liam catches you, encouraging you to keep going, but it’s like your brain and body are no longer connected. As much as you try, you can’t keep going. 

Liam senses this and puts his arm around you, helping you stay upright and continue moving forward. 

There’s a house up ahead, the obvious destination. You’re close, and then you hear the noise behind you. 

The van that you’d been in when this all started is barreling towards your group. They’ve nearly caught up, and you feel like just giving in, admitting defeat. 

But Liam won’t let you. “Everyone just keep going!” He yells. 

A figure runs out of the house up ahead, followed by at least 20 others. All in uniform. All armed. 

You’re scared at first, not knowing if they’re there to help you or help your captors. And then you see him. Paul Higgins. Your true guardian angel. 

The van has stopped following, now surrounded by law enforcement, but the six of you can’t stop. Can’t understand that the danger is gone. 

Paul, along with a few other members of your normal security team surround you to check if you’re okay. The boys assure them that they only have minor injuries, all saying the same thing: “Help Y/N,” “Y/N’s hurt”, “Y/N needs help”. 

The next thing you know, Paul is reaching for you, picking you up and cradling you to him. “You’re safe now,” he says quietly, and you start to believe that. 

He carries you towards the house, explaining that they’d gotten a tip the night before and were searching the area, the homeowner allowing them to use the place as a base of operations. 

You hear sirens growing louder, and multiple ambulances pull up. Seeing this, Niall says “Paul really, we’re okay. They really only focused on Y/N. We’ve just got some scrapes.”

“You’ll all be going to the hospital and getting checked by a doctor. No exceptions.”

“Yes, dad,” Louis says, but it doesn’t have the normal teasing tone. At this moment, you’re all very grateful for this man you call your tour dad. 

When Paul goes to set you down on a stretcher you begin to panic, clutching his shirt the way you had with Zayn the night before. 

“I’m not leaving you, I promise. But you have to let them take care of you so you can get better,” he says. 

It’s hard to let go but you do manage. As promised Paul stays by your side the whole time. The ambulance ride feels forever, and the longer you lay unmoving, the more pain you feel. 

You don’t realize you’re crying until you feel Paul gently wipe tears off your face. You turn to look at him and he gives you a sad smile, saying “I know sweetheart. It’s all over now. I’ve got you.”

He’s able to hold your hand, and he gives you a reassuring squeeze. It’s the last thing you’re aware of before your world turns black.

The first time you wake up, there’s chaos around you. Doctors yelling about internal injuries and needing scans, nurses hooking you up to different wires and tubes. A doctor gives another order, and something is pushed through your IV, and once again everything fades away.

The next time you wake is much calmer. You’re in a patient room, your body wrapped in gauze. Paul is sitting beside your bed, once again holding your hand. This time you squeeze his, and he looks up, clearly relieved to see your eyes open. 

He tells you about your injuries, the treatments and surgery you went through, and how you’ll be in the hospital for a few days before needing to recover at home for weeks. 

“What about the boys?” is your first question.

“They’re okay. Minor injuries. Doctors are keeping them overnight to be safe but they should all be released tomorrow,” Paul answers.

“Good. I’m glad they weren’t hurt.”

“Louis told me you think this is your fault.”

“It is. They were all taken because of me.”

“Sweetheart, you need to know that’s not the truth. We found a letter from them, after they took you all, and it was clear they always planned to take the whole band.  You are not to blame. You didn’t do anything or make anything happen.”

“It’s not my fault?” You ask. 

“It is not your fault,” he says, his voice strong and sure. 

“It’s not my fault,” you say. 

“That’s right, sweetheart,” he answers as he strokes the hair out of your face. 

A moment later a few nurses and doctors enter. They tell you the injuries you sustained and what they’re doing to treat them. They ask questions that you do your best to answer. Finally they finish taking vitals and leave once more. You’re grateful, as you’ve started to feel tired again. 

“Sleep, I’ll be here all night,” Paul says. With that reassurance, you close your eyes and immediately fall asleep. 

The next time you wake up the clock on your table reads 7:12am. You’d slept almost ten full hours. As promised Paul is there, sleeping uncomfortably on the couch. 

There’s a nurse in the room, and she smiles when she sees you watching her. 

“Good morning, I’m just going to take your vitals,” she says. When she finishes that she and another nurse help you to the restroom, and you're glad your injuries haven’t completely bedridden you. You’re given a light breakfast, and while you don’t have the biggest appetite, you do enjoy a little hot food after days of nothing but granola bars. 

After you’ve eaten, the doctor comes to check on you, making sure you’re doing well and changing some of the bandages. 

You’ve been awake a couple hours when Paul gets an update. 

“Louis and Zayn are getting discharged now,” he says. 

“What about the others?” 

“Should be later today. Apparently their doc was called away before he could get to everyone so they need to wait a bit.”

“Are Louis and Zayn leaving?” 

“We’re figuring that out.”

“Can I see them?” 

“I think I can make that happen. Are you alright here for a few minutes if I go help the boys?”

While you don’t want him to leave, you know the others need him as well so you say, “Yea, I’ll be okay. I’m kind of tired again, can I sleep?”

“Of course you can, darling. Get your rest, it’ll help you heal. I promise I won’t be far, and Ryan is right outside if you need anyone.”

You do feel better knowing Ryan is there, since he’s basically Paul’s second in command. 

Without realizing you’ve even fallen asleep the next thing you’re aware of is voices around you. 

“She’s really going to be okay?” You hear Zayn ask worriedly. 

“She’s going to be fine. It’ll take some time for her to heal but she’ll make a full recovery,” Paul explains. 

“You’re sure?” Niall asks, his voice unsteady. 

“I’m sure. The doctors said she’ll be okay. And you know her, she’s strong.”

Strong. The word most used to describe you. But you don’t feel that way right now. You were hurt, bruised and bloodied. You don’t want to be strong anymore. 

“Can I be done?” You ask. 

They boys all turn to you, gathering by your bedside now that you’ve woken up. 

“What was that? We didn’t hear what you said,” Liam asks. 

“I want to be done,” you reply. 

“Done with what, love?” Louis questions. 

“Being strong. I don’t wanna be strong right now.”

“That’s okay,” Louis answers. “You don’t have to be. Lean on us.”

“Yea, we’ll take care of you!” Niall adds. 

“Thank you. I’m just so tired.”

“I know. You’ve fought hard, now you can rest,” Zayn says. 

You smile softly at them, and then realize someone’s missing. 

“Where’s Harry?” You ask, your voice laced with panic as your heart rate skyrockets. 

“He’s okay!” Louis quickly assures you. “He just needed one extra test before they could discharge him.”

“Why? What was the test?”

Liam answers this time, explaining, “His oxygen was a bit low when they brought us in yesterday so they’re making sure everything’s fine. Which it is. It was just low because of his asthma and all the running we did. He’s fine. He’ll be here soon.”

As though being summoned, Harry walks in a moment later. 

“What’s wrong?” he asks, rushing to your side when he sees how upset you are. 

You take a deep breath, relieved to have all five of your boys with you. 

“Don’t leave me. Please,” you beg.

“We won’t,” Harry replies. “We’re all here. We’re all sticking together. We promise. Right?”

The others all nod, Harry and Niall each holding your hands to reassure you with comforting contact. 

For the rest of your hospital stay, they keep their promise to the best of their ability. None of them are allowed to stay overnight, but all five of them are there with you during every minute that visitors are welcomed. 

When you’re finally discharged, you go to the house the boys have been staying at. Of course their families all wanted them to go back to their respective homes, but they couldn’t bear to be away from you. 

Your parents also hoped you’d be coming home while you recovered, but it would feel strange to go back there. You’re not the same person you were the last time you left. You just can’t go back just yet, not when so much has changed. 

So the six of you, along with Paul and a few other security guards, all live together for the months following the incident. You’re given your own room, but you rarely spend a night alone. At first someone was staying with you in case you needed help at night while you continued to recover from your physical injuries.

They kept taking turns staying with you when it became clear your nightmares wouldn’t go away. The couple of nights that you did spend by yourself you’d woken up screaming and crying, calling out for the boys, panicking that they were gone. 

From then on they had a rotation on who would stay with you. Having one of them in your bed often kept the bad dreams away, and when the nightmares did happen, whoever was there could quickly calm and reassure you that everything was okay. 

After seven months of recovery and planning, it’s finally time to restart tour. Your emotions are going wild leading up to that first show, but the second you get on stage, you feel alive again. For months you hid away, leaning on your bandmates and truly feeling like a diminished version of yourself. 

You’d needed that in order to heal. Letting yourself be vulnerable allowed for others to help build you back up. 

And now you feel like yourself again. You know this experience will stick with you forever, and you’ll be dealing with the mental impacts of this for years to come. But you also know that Harry, Liam, Niall, Louis, and Zayn will always be there for you whenever you need them. 

You turn towards them at the end of the show, right before final bows, and find them all watching you, their faces full of admiration, awe, and love.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Thank you for reading!

After everything that happened recently I knew I needed to give Paul Higgins a moment in the spotlight.

[chericherrybaby]

BUT DADDY I LOVE HIM

Summary, Y/N just wanting to tell the world her and Harry’s secret after having so much privacy for three years.

~

Trying to get Harry Styles to understand social media was tough. He had slowly began to get the hang of it with his tour posts, and a few casual stories sometimes.

With some slip ups of pictures that were supposed to be on his close friends, the mirror picture being a personal favourite.

“Harry” you called from the hallway, approaching his little studio room in your house. “can we do that tik tok trend”

Harry sighed, turning his swivel chair to look you in your face “What is a tik tok trend? I thought we were doing babysteps”

You move closer, sitting yourself on his lap, his hand moving towards your baby bump. Your bump that was a secret from everyone but was almost ready to arrive in the world.

“You know what a trend is, and a tik tok. Put it together Har” you looked him in his eyes, his lips curling up in a little smirk.

“Fine, okay. I’ll do it” He always gave in so quickly to you, you knew he’d be the same with your daughter when she was old enough to want things.

You ran to the living room to grab your phone, quickly walking back, out of breath from the small run you’d done before.

You sat yourself back on Harry’s lap and pulled your tik tok up to your saved videos. You clicked on a random one and quickly the song “But daddy i love him” played from your phone.

“I’m having his baby. No i’m not but you should see your faces” the video showed a couple holding an ultrasound picture and a positive pregnancy test, only their hands in frame. The next picture was the same picture instead in pintrest with different people from the ones who posted.

You swiped off the app and put your phone on Harry desk “What’d you think?” you ask him honestly. If he wasn’t ready to announce you wouldn’t. He did so much for you and the least you could do is respect how private he wanted to be with your life together.

“Y/n you actually are having my baby” He looked up at you, reminding you like there was anyway you’d forget you were having Harry Styles baby. So many girls dream come true.

“I know but it’ll be a funny announcement. will shock everyone” you replied giving him slight doe eyes, hoping for him to just say yes.

Keeping this a secret was getting so hard and you felt slightly miserable keeping it, just wanting to embrace your pregnancy now it was almost over.

“Baby, we’ve been married for three years.” Harry reminded you again, as if you had forgotten another one of the most important days of your life.

“But i wanna be included” You had said getting a bit upset with him. “I got to post two wedding pictures and i’ve got to hide my very first pregnancy from the world. It’s not fair”

Harry could see tears slowly gathering in your waterline. He put his palm on your cheek, making you slightly look up at him.

“Let’s tell the world”

yourinstagram just posted!

liked by annestyles, perrieedwards and 5,789,157 other

yourinstagram: I’m havin his baby. Yes seriously. Baby Styles.

[lonelycowgirls]

Tongue-Tied

I'm ovulating and I'll give no other explanation.

Thank you for your time.

Warnings: smut | harry in barcelona Word Count: 1.9k

Angel: You better get your man, Stell

Angel: Sent 1 image

Looking to the side at her phone as she washed the dishes and cooking utensils she’d used to make up her breakfast, Stella’s brow furrowed, her belly flipping wondering what he’d done now. He was three shows off completing Love on Tour and the gravity of tour being over was starting to hit home for both of them, especially Harry. The result; him growing more and more uninhibited on stage.

She swatted gently at Delilah who was perched on the only clean tea towel in the house - she really needed to catch up on some laundry - and dried her hands on it once the cat had slinked off, heading for the cat flap at the back door. She unlocked her phone and leaned back against the sink to open the text thread she shared with her work friend.

The image wasn’t actually an image, but a GIF. A moving image of her partner playing guitar, her eyes widening as she watched him lean down to enact the motion of playing the strings with his tongue. She watched it repeat on a loop a few times and chuckled dryly to herself. This man was becoming unhinged.

Stella: Now where have I seen that action before…?🤔 Angel: Oooooh get it girl!!!👏🏾👏🏾

Stella laughed to herself again and opened up her TikTok. Her For You page often had a lot of Harry on it, because that was the content she found herself liking and sharing. Whether it be a sweet fan interaction she would share with Anne or a video of Harry tripping or stumbling she would have a giggle over with Gemma and Dolly.

As she scrolled, her feed was jam-packed with content surrounding Harry at his Barcelona date. This wasn’t uncommon, as it was obviously the most recent concert. But the focus was a little abnormal. Emphasis on the ab... People were going feral over Harry’s body and she couldn’t help but smirk to herself. He did look damn good. She often complimented him on his newly buffed-up physique, but she didn’t want to stroke his ego too much. That got enough stroking every time he galloped on stage.

This was maybe a little different though. She thought to herself - she’d probably not seen him look or act this sexy since the first One Direction stadium tour. Back when Harry’s hair was the longest it ever got to and he made it everyone’s problem.

She tapped on the Clock app on her phone to check the World Clock for the time in Barcelona. It was just gone 9am in London, making it around 10am where he was. She wasn’t sure if he’d still be sleeping or training or out sightseeing, but she tapped on the FaceTime icon anyway.

Walking through to the living room as her phone dialled his, she glanced out of the window and rolled her eyes at the rain pelting the glass. It was so unfair how he got to be in the sunshine while she was practically engulfed in a typhoon. Bloody England. She glanced down at her phone again when the little chime alerted her that he had answered and connected.

His face filled the screen, a glowing orb of yellow sunlight behind him surrounded by blue sky. His bare shoulders and the trim of a parasol peaking into the frame indicated that he was by the pool or on the beach. Bastard.

“Oh my God, look at that weather.” Stella groaned, collapsing back on the sofa with a flop. He chuckled and moved his sunglasses to sit on top of his head.

“Good morning to you too.” He replied, resting back against the sun lounger and squinting at the screen. “To what do I owe the pleasure of seeing your beautiful face so early?”

“Oh, nothing much, just getting digitally assaulted with pictures and videos of you whoring yourself out for thousands of people. The usual.” Harry laughed as she rolled her eyes at him.

“What do you mean?” He questioned loudly around a smirk.

“You know, I haven’t seen that tongue move like that in a while.” She mumbled, now displaying her own smirk.

“Oh,” Harry chuckled, this time running a hand down his face as he remembered his actions and finally registered what she was talking about. “God, I dunno what comes over me.” He said smiling, dimples on full display and cheeks slightly tinted in a blush.

“Well, I hope it comes over you again when we go to Italy next week…” She said softly, almost certain he wasn’t alone - he never was. He smirked and lifted an arm to rest over his head on the lounger. She could see the muscle in his biceps move under his skin with the motion, the tattoos rippling and causing her to drop her head back against the sofa. She really wished he was there, now.

“Yeah? Would you like that, Stell?” She nodded and he sighed, folding his lips into his mouth and furrowing his brow. He eyed her neck as her head leaned back against the back of the sofa and watched her long lashes blink over her hooded eyes. He couldn’t wait to have her in his favourite place, her tanned skin smooth under his palms, couldn’t wait to feel her pulse under his fingers as he wrapped them around her throat. “Want me to do the same on your little clit?”

Her lids closed as she inhaled and smiled with a nod, teeth digging into her bottom lip. Suddenly, her expression changed to one of pain as she raised from her position on the sofa. “Shit, H I need to go get ready.”

“For what?”

“I’m meeting your sister for yoga in like half an hour.”

“Ah great, I needed someone to say something to help me get rid of this tent in my trunks. Mentioning my sister always does the trick.” He said sarcastically with a thumbs up to the camera.

“Aw, you got a stiffy for me? Let’s see.” Harry rolled his eyes and brought the camera down to his shorts. Barely there but noticeable if pointed out, a slight bump was peaking up from his black Nike swimming trunks. He swiftly brought the camera back up to his face, Stella beamed at him on the other side. “I’ve still got it.” She said with a wink.

“Always have, always will.” He said sincerely and she bristled, feeling a warmth spread through her at the look in his kind eyes. “Come on Stell, let me help you before you go.”

“Help me what?” She said, a brow arched knowingly, she knew what he was up to.

“You know what. Let me give you a good one, so I know you’re thinking of me when you’re in your downward dog.” She snorted, looking away and then looking back at him.

“Alright fine, but you need to put your AirPods on or something.” She conditioned, not wanting Brad or Mitch or anyone who may be around him to hear her through the phone.

“Don’t worry, I’m on a patch of free beds, behind some palm trees. There’s hardly anyone here and Brad’s in the pool.” She nodded and waited for his instructions. “Take your bottoms off, baby.”

She dutifully did as he said, sliding her pyjama shorts off so that she was bare, perching a leg up on the coffee table so that she was open to herself.

“Give your fingers a lick, three of them.” She bit her lip and nodded again, making sure to angle her phone at her face as she sunk further into the cushions of the sofa. She brought her fingers up to lick a long stripe up the surface of them, not waiting for him to tell her what to do next and bringing them to start rubbing circles into her clit. She sighed at the feeling of her fingers getting wetter and wetter with the way she was already so turned on.

“Eager aren’t we?” Harry smirked, wanting to rut his hips into the air but restraining himself. “A girl who always knows what she wants.” Stella’s brows knitted in the middle as a ripple of pleasure coursed through her. “Keep rubbing that pretty clit, baby, that’s it. Is it all swollen?” She nodded, an audible moan quietly escaping her. “For me?”

“Yes, Harry. Watching you lick that guitar… fuckin’ hell.” She sighed, shaking her head, almost in disbelief.

“Yeah? Did that do it for you, baby?” She nodded and moaned as her lips folded into her mouth. Picking up the pace of the circular motions on her clit. “Want my tongue working on you like that?” She nodded, swearing and looking down at where her hips had begun to swirl along with her fingers, complimenting her wrist's motions. Harry had to see. “Show me, Stell.” He said, low and gruff.

She brought the camera down, angling it so her full body was in view, her vest ridden up to just below her boobs, her naked bottom half bucking and twisting in the air. Harry nearly doubled over.

“Fuck me. You’re everything.” He groaned, bringing a hand to his forehead and closing his eyes tight. Trying to control his hips and body’s reaction to her stunning image. “Keep going, baby, good girl. Can’t wait to have you in my bed again. Gonna lock us in our villa and make you scream.”

Stella’s moans became louder and louder as she chased her high. “Yeah, that’s it, get yourself there, Stell, come on.” She panted and groaned as she brought the three fingers he’d suggested into her slick hole, pumping just right, getting closer and closer. “You’re fucking beautiful, my God, wish I was fucking there.” Arching up, Harry’s view was almost non-existent as she writhed, the phone in her hand no longer her priority. “I’ll be on my knees for you, soon as I walk through the door.”

“Fuck, I’m gonna come.” She gasped, her fingers now rubbing ruthlessly across her clit, toes curling and stretching.

“Give it up, Stell.” With that, the phone was dropped. Stella’s fingers dug into the softness of the sofa as she squealed and panted, writhing, her other hand not relenting on her pussy. Harry waited patiently, still giving her appreciative comments of how good she was, how gorgeous she was, how he loved her so much. Her hips finally found their place again on the edge of the sofa as she collapsed back down to Earth. Catching her breath, she picked up her phone again to see him smiling softly at her, only before laughing at her red cheeks and messed up hair. “Enjoy that, babe?”

She giggled back, blowing at a strand of hair that had fallen into her face. The familiar feeling of a post-orgasm making her glow from within. “Mhm, feeling good, baby.” She breathed, completely blissed out. She wanted to kiss him so bad, almost ready to climb through the phone to get to him. “Oh, shit.” Stella laughed slightly, Harry’s brow furrowed at the change of pace. “Gem’s just text me. She’s just left. I’ve gotta go, Gorgeous. Love you.”

“Alright, Stell,” Harry said, sitting up in his lounger, placing a foot on either side of the bed in a straddle. His full chest and upper body now visible, making her belly flip once more. “Good job I came in my shorts, knew you wouldn’t wanna return the favour.” He shook his head, playfully tutting in disappointment.

“Aw, you poor thing.” Stella pouted, before giggling and raising from the sofa, running her fingers through her hair in an attempt to tame it. “Have a good time cleaning up!” She joked, before hanging up and trotting up the stairs. Her phone pinged almost instantaneously.

Harry: Glad I could be of service 🫡

Stella: Don’t worry, I’ll show you my downward dog later 😉

~~~

That was fun.

Nel xo

P.s. you can read the rest of the pieces from this universe here.

[themultifandomgal]

From 2010- Johnathan Ross Show 2

Part 50

2015

“Welcome back guys” Johnathan welcomes us as we all sit on the sofa with Michael Mcintyre. I sit in between Louis and Liam “now you’ve just finished your fourth world tour, what is it that you miss when your away and when your finished you think right now I have the time to do this”

“I miss my dog cookie a lot and honestly by the end of tour I just want to get home to her”

“Who looks after her while you’re on tour?”

“She lives between my dad and friend Emma”

“What about the rest of you?”

“I miss a fridge. You don’t realise how much you miss it while living in hotel rooms for months” Liam says leaning on his hand

“Erm I like to play football when I’m back at home. We don’t get a lot of free time on tour so yeah I just like to have a kick around” Louis replies to the question

“I think it’s probably sleeping in different beds. It nice to sleep in your own” the audience all laugh, Harry realises what he’s said and get up off the sofa and begins to walk off

“I agreed with ya” Niall says

“I think we all agree but most of us don’t get the chance” Johnathan says to us making everyone laugh “and Niall for you except for that answer”

“I guess home cooking. Like your mums cooking and stuff like that”

“Now YN you’ve been getting a lot of hate recently in the press. Do you ever wish that this didn’t happen, that you never went on the X-Factor?”

“Yes and no. It’s tough because if I didn’t, I could be in a relationship that I hate, and I wouldn’t have met these guys who are my best friends, but then there is a part of me when I get the hate that I just think what was this for?”

“How do you deal with that?”

“Erm I write, a lot, and I have a good team around me and therapy helps too”

“What about the rest of you? There must be times when you think what would it be like if we hadn’t come 3rd”

“Is that supposed to be funny or?” Louis says

“No just you’ve done well for yourselves you know what I mean? It’s like….”

“I don’t think we’d change anything” Harry looks between all of us “we all feel very lucky to have this opportunity. I know YN has struggled with the press, which I think any of us would with what’s been said, but I think if we were to wish we had done more pubs and clubs that we’d be a bit silly really”

“I mean you could do pubs and clubs, just sneak in and do a cover gig just for the hell of it”

“We could” Niall laughs a little

“Now something we need to bring up is that Zayn is missing” Jonathan says, Harry turns around as if he’s looking for him making me laugh “he’s left the band”

“Zayn is missing!” Michael shouts then gets up off his chair “has anyone seen Zayn? I’m Zayn come on” he sits back down

“Oh thank goodness I’m struggling carrying the high notes” I sigh which causes the audience to laugh

“Now it seemed quite abrupt when he left. One minute he was with you the next he was gone. What happened there?”

“You wanna answer this one Michael?” Harry asks and we all turn to look at him looking very serious

“Well yeah you know, Zayn as you all know is one of the boys, talented, he’s exceptional, he’s got it all and err we were on the road and err and to be honest the thing is, I couldn’t find the fridge. I called Liam and he said ‘Mcintyre you know there’s no fridge in hotels that why I can’t wait to get home’ so I called Harry and he could have been in any hotel so I called Zayn he basically said I’ve had enough of this and left”

“Ok no but seriously what happened?”

“I think we just all notice he wasn’t enjoying it anymore and we were and it can be intense and he wanted to be in a different place and that’s fair enough”

“YN let’s move on to you shall we. A year ago the news about you and Liam splitting up broke out, have you been single or is there been anyone else in your life? Because there’s rumours that you and Harry are or were dating then rumours that it was Zayn that’s why he left. Can you confirm or deny?”

“Erm Harry and I have had these rumours since X-Factor so that’s nothing new, but hearing that Zayn cheated on Perrie with me and I cheated on Liam with Zayn and that’s why he left is just ridiculous”

“But even Liam has said things that alluded to cheating”

“Hes clearly not over you” Micheal says trying to cut the tension

“It’s been a year now, I’ve been single and still am. I’ve been in relationships really since I was like 15 so as a young woman I want to learn about myself for now”

“Now you’ve all announced that you’re taking a break from the band, YN you announced an album coming next year. What’s the reception been like?”

“Errrm I thinks it’s very bittersweet, I’ve had a lot of fans message me that they’re excited but also sad that we’re on a break, but who knows what’s going to happen over the next few years” I shrug a little

“Your going to be very busy next year because it’s just been announced that your joining Justin Beiber on the European leg of his Purpose tour. When does that start?”

“20th August next year” the audience cheer as well as the boys

“I thought the point of a break was to relax?” Micheal says making everyone laugh

“Now we’re going to have a little break and then when we come back we’re going to play never have I ever”

“Oh god” Harry mumbles looking nervous.

“Ok we’re back and we’re going to play never have I ever. So i have these paddles. They say, never and I have” Johnathan passes the paddles down to us and he begins the questions

“I have never danced naked in the rain” I hold up never

“I have never been in the mile high club” I say never immediately

“Harry what are you waiting for we know the answer” Johnathan says and Harry throws his paddle behind him shaking his head

“I have never been naked in public” again I hold up never

“That’s choice we all have when we wake up in the morning” Micheal says

“I have never smoked a joint”

“I’m so boring” I laugh holding up never again

Michael then pretends to be Niall telling Johnathan that the paddles aren’t going to reveal anything because we’re media trained. It was actually quite funny.

“Ok taking about media trained, there’s a lot of things that get miss reported so I’ve got some stories here and I wanna see if these were true or not

“Harry was sick on the side of the road and then a fan collected the vomit and then tried to sell it on eBay. Was that true”

“I don’t know if it made it to eBay but it was a thing”

“That’s just weird. Ok next one One D singer reveals STD worries after koala bear incident”

“I think I said it as a joke and it just went to far” Liam says explaining what happened

We finish up the interview with Johnathan then make our way to our hotel room where I end up writing more of my upcoming album.

[justmystyles]

NEED YOU TO WRITE A JEALOUS/Angsty one for the picture of whoever is applying moisturiser to Harry. Your angst is soooooo good

PS: I’m OBSESSED with your work

Business or Pleasure?

read my other works here!

pairing: Harry Styles x plus size reader

word count: 2.3k

summary: you return to Love on Tour after an extended break, but after your last interaction, you come back to an awkward situation with Harry.

a/n: first of all, thank you so much for sending in this request, and for your kind words! when i first saw it, i wasn't really sure how to make angst out of it, but i think i figured it out pretty well.

i did take some artistic liberties with timelines here, i know the outfits and tour dates don't line up, but i had to suspend disbelief a little to make the story work out. sorry, don't come for me!

**Hey, so let's try this again! The first time I posted it was answering the wrong ask. That one will still be done snd posted. I promise!**

tags: @allthelovehes @ameerakane20 @ash-craze @bethanysnow @blue-ballad @blueraspberryreader @brightlightsinlife @creativelyeva @cute-as-ducks420 @deannaard @fanficismydrug @gem1712 @golden-hoax @gothmingguk @groovychaosavenue @hillzrry @iceebabies @indierockgirrl @jerseygirlinca @jng4kook @jooniesbabie @kaverichauhan @laurxn-robinson @lexiecamposv @mrs-anna-styles211994 @n0vaj3an @potterheadandsherlocked @rach2699 @ravenclawdirectioner @stylesfeverr @superchrystaldrug @tenaciousperfectionunknown @tiaamberxx @thechaoticjoy @theekyliepage @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @youknowwhaaat

As your car traveled through the streets of Glasgow, you were unable to really take in the stunning scenery around you. You were too busy worrying about what the day had in store for you, panicking about being face to face with him again. 

Love on Tour had been on break since November, so you hadn’t seen Harry in nearly seven months. And the last time you did see him, things got complicated. After the last show, Harry had rented out a local bar to throw what he deemed the ‘Love on Tour holiday party’. Since everyone would be going their separate ways for a bit, he wanted to give this family he had formed a chance to celebrate together. 

As with most holiday parties, the alcohol was flowing rather freely, and everyone was getting loose and having a good time. You noticed that as the night went on, Harry was by your side more and more, his jokes getting slightly more flirty and his touches lingering just a little longer than they usually would. You two had developed a pretty flirty relationship, but he was like that with everyone, so you didn’t think much of it.

Until you found yourselves in a secluded corner of the bar with his tongue down your throat. 

Sure, it was something you had thought about for a while. Harry was one of the most gorgeous people you had ever seen, and to top it off he was so kind, and funny. He was technically your boss, but you would never know it. He treated you like his equal, his friend. Developing a crush on him was inevitable. But you had never expected anything to happen. Then it did, and you hadn’t heard from him since. 

At some point, Harry had gotten pulled away from you to do shots with the band, and you had an early flight the next morning. So you decided to slip out while he was distracted, it would allow you to put off the awkward conversation, at least for a little while. 

You had expected a call or text, anything from him the next day, but you didn’t. You hadn’t heard from him once since that night. You had seen him making appearances and doing interviews, which meant that he had hired someone else for his glam during the break, that hurt. He had regretted that night so much that he didn’t even want to work with you. 

You were contracted for the entirety of his tour, so you knew you would have to go back. When you signed on for the tour, you were excited to see the world, but now you were dreading every second you had to spend with Harry pretending that nothing had happened between the two of you. Pretending that you weren’t heartbroken. 

“Miss?” The driver’s voice brought you out of your thoughts, and you realized that you had arrived.

You thanked the driver as he handed you your bags and made your way through the backstage area. As you walked down the hall, you stopped to say hi and caught up quickly with people you’d run into, sharing quick stories about your break and promising to catch up soon. You found your way to the glam room, and took your time setting everything, partially because of how particular you were, but more than that, you wanted to kill as much time as you could so you didn’t have to go out to the common areas and socialize. You knew he’d be there, and you didn’t want to face him. 

Once things were set up, you killed time alone in your space, scrolling through your phone. You heard voices coming down the hallway, one of them was unmistakable. You put your phone down and took a deep breath to prepare yourself. As he walked through the door, you plastered your best fake smile on. 

Harry saw you, and you noticed his expression falter slightly, but he quickly corrected it. “Hey Y/N, welcome back.” He said, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and pulling you into a quick side hug. It was significantly shorter than your past hugs, but it was long enough for his scent to overtake your senses. 

“Thanks,” you mumble as you step back, signaling for him to take a seat. You and Jeff say your hellos, and you make your way to your kit. The sooner you got started, the sooner you’d be finished, and you’d be able to get some distance from Harry. 

Jeff stayed by Harry’s side while he was in your chair. No doubt a calculated measure by Harry to make sure you weren’t left alone. As grateful as you were for that, you were also annoyed. He was the one that kissed you, and he wasn’t even man enough to reject you and apologize. 

“You’re all set.” You said once you were finished. You noticed Harry flinch slightly at your tone. You didn’t mean for your words to come out so stern, but you would only be able to hold back your emotions for so much longer. 

“Oh… okay, thanks Y/N.” Harry said cautiously as he got out of the chair, walking out of the room with Jeff. 

Once they were gone, you sat down into the chair Harry had just been in and dropped your face into your hands. The rest of this tour was going to be a nightmare. 

“Y/N, we need you backstage real quick.” Jeff sticks his head in the door only a couple of minutes before showtime. “And grab that lotion.” 

You furrow your brow, but comply. Grabbing the bottle and following Jeff down the hall. You find Harry standing shirtless amongst the hustle and bustle of pre-show preparations. 

“Um…” You got Harry’s attention and held up the bottle. “Jeff asked for this?” 

“Oh, right. I um… well…” He gestures to his bare torso. “I can do it if–”

“No no,” you interrupt him. “It’s fine, it’s my job.” You pump some lotion into your hand and set the bottle down. You rub your hands together and step up to Harry, taking a deep breath to center yourself before placing your hands on his chest and rubbing the lotion in. 

As your hands run along his body, your mind flashes back to that night. Your hands on his, his on you, your tongues entwined. You shake off the thoughts.

“Are you okay?” Harry asks, you look up to meet his concerned, almost sad gaze. 

“Yeah, I’m fine.” You lie. Your eyes remain locked on each other, Harry opens his mouth to say something. 

“The internet is going to go nuts for this!” You both snap your attention over to Lloyd, who was snapping pictures of your interaction. 

You feel your face heat up and look down, trying to hide your blush from Harry. You hurry to finish applying the lotion. “All set,” you finally say, unable to look up at him. He thanks you as you’re scurrying away, rushing back to your area. 

All you wanted to do was go back to the hotel and hide, but you knew you’d need to stay for a few touch ups before the encore. So you spent the entirety of the show sitting alone in the hair and makeup area lost in your thoughts, wondering how you were going to make it through. 

You kept an eye on the show through the monitor, making your way to the backstage area as he was finishing up his final song before the encore. He rushed over to you, breathing heavy, and adrenaline running high. You made some quick adjustments to his hair, and handed him a towel so he could wipe down a bit before going back out there, avoiding his gaze the whole time. 

He thanks you quietly before he returns to the stage, and you return to your space. While he’s finishing the show, you pack your things, hoping to get out of there and back to the hotel before he’s off stage. As you're closing up your case, you’re startled by a knock at the door. You look up and silently curse yourself for not moving faster when you see Harry standing in front of you. His chest rising and falling rapidly, still catching his breath, his body glistening, a combination of sweat and the lotion you had applied earlier. He was the last person you wanted to see, but you couldn’t look away. 

“Hi,” he breaks the silence. “Can we talk for a minute?” 

“I can’t, my car is waiting. I’ve gotta get back to the hotel.” You pick up your case and move closer to him, but he refuses to move from the doorway. 

“Please,” he pleads with you. You look up and see determination in his eyes. He’s not going to let you go without talking. You relent, dropping your case by the door and signaling for him to come in. “You’re not going to pull some fancy footwork and run past me if I move away from the door?”

You shake your head, you know he’s making a joke, but you can’t bring yourself to laugh. You move further into the room, hopping up to take a seat on the counter. “I’m here.” 

Harry takes a seat, running a hand through his hair as he tries to form the words. “I think I owe you an apology for the last time I saw you.” You remain silent, hoping he continues. “I was drunk, I crossed a line that I shouldn’t have, it wasn’t professional.” 

“It’s okay, we were both drunk.” You say, your feet swinging back and forth. 

“The last thing I wanted to do was screw up what we had,” he confessed.

“It’s fine, like you said, you were drunk. It didn’t mean anything.” 

Harry looked up at you, his brows furrowed. “I said I was drunk Y/N, not that it didn’t mean anything.” 

Your eyes went wide at his words. “I… what?” Before he could continue. “I just assumed it was a dunk fling or whatever.” 

“Have you ever heard the phrase ‘drunken words are sober thoughts’?” You nod, trying to put the puzzle together. “Well in this case, it’s drunken actions.” He stood from his seat, stepping closer to you. “I’ve been wanting to kiss you for a long time. I had liquid courage running through me that night, I knew I wasn’t going to see you for a while, and you looked so beautiful, and you smiled at me like that, and I just couldn’t help myself.” 

“Oh,” you said softly, it was the only thing you could manage to get out. 

“After the guys pulled me away, I tried to find you. I wanted to lay everything out, tell you how I felt, but you left.” He looked down, but you could see the pain in his eyes before they dropped. “We had kissed, it was this amazing kiss, and then you just left without saying goodbye. I realized I had fucked up.” 

“I didn’t, that’s not why I left, I…” You were about to apologize for leaving, but he could have just as easily called you. “Why didn’t you just call? Text? Anything?” 

“I felt so bad. I didn’t know what to say. The more time had passed, the harder it got. And before I knew it, it had been seven months.” He saw the tears welling in your eyes, and his heart sank. “I missed you so much during the break, but I miss you more now. You’re right in front of me, but it feels like you’re a million miles away.”

“I’m right here, Harry.” 

“You’re not though, we’ve barely said anything to each other, and there’s this awkwardness between us. I hate it.” His voice starts raising, frustration growing in his tone. “It was one of the best kisses of my life, but if I could go back in time and stop it from happening so that we could be us again, I would.” 

“Harry?” He looks up at you and you see a vulnerability in his eyes that you’d never seen before. “I wanted that kiss too. It meant so much to me.” 

“But… but you just left…”

“I had an early flight, and I didn’t want to pull you away because you felt like you needed to let me down easy. I just assumed I’d hear from you the next day, hungover and apologize. But I never did.” 

Harry stepped in between your legs, his hand coming up and brushing across your cheek. “You’ve wanted to kiss me too?” Your breath hitched from how close he was, all you could do was nod. He smirked at your nerves, relief washing over him. “You know, when you were putting that lotion on earlier, when your hands were all over me,” his face moved closer, his lips just a breath away from yours. “You were driving me crazy.” 

You couldn’t contain yourself, his husky tone, his breath against your face, you closed the distance and kissed him. He groaned against your lips as his hands rested on your thighs, squeezing gently. This kiss was different than the last, that first kiss was sloppy, desperate. This time, it was slower, more deliberate. 

When you finally separated, you were both breathless, silly grins plastered on your faces. “So, what now?” You ask, unsure about where this leaves you. 

“Well,” Harry sighs, his thumbs running back and forth over your thighs. “We definitely still have stuff to talk about, but I’m hoping it leads to a lot more of that.” He smiled, kissing the tip of your nose. 

“I have a feeling it will.” You smirk, pulling him in for another kiss. 

[alonetimelover]

pairing: Harry Styles x tennis player!reader

summary: sometimes it is not meant to work out, no matter how much you and everyone else want it to. or is it?

a/n: so before wimbledon ended (before Iga lost her quarterfinal), I made this. its like fiction within fiction, ya know?

masterlist (with more tennis player!reader)

——————————————————————————————

twitter

i love harry and yn | babiesharry

guys... just a quick thought. we haven't seen any pics of yn and harry together for a whole month. there are no interactions online, and there are no acknowledgements during concerts or after matches.

do we think its the, you know, end?

3k likes 1,04k comments 3,4k replies

——————————————————————————————

lot tour 23 | aliceeeee

it is a little bit confusing. in the latest interview yn, when asked about listening to music before a match, she answered only with Taylor (before she also was saying Harry)

so that's it...

2k likes 1,44k comments 2,4k replies

——————————————————————————————

saw harry in vienna | lovingharry

harry is also not as bubbly as he made us used to see him, last night he wasn't even doing all the stomps during satellite, no funny dances or backbends...

1k likes 1k comments 3k replies

——————————————————————————————

yn is the best | lovingtennisyn

let's not speculate about them and just support our idols. yn has a very difficult tournament before herself and harry is almost done with touring. best we can do is applaud them for their work, their private lives shouldn't be our concern

4k likes 1,5k comments 5k replies

——————————————————————————————

harry my love | byebyenyc

i fear the worst... yn is in london and none interaction with Harry, his family, or friends? it is not an accident

2k likes 1,7k comments 0,9k replies

——————————————————————————————

Instagram

harryupdates

liked by ynupdates, hArrysbtch and 15 302 others

harryupdates HARRY AFTER CATCHNING A FANMADE BRACELET ON STAGE TONIGHT!

view all 2 402 comments

lanastyles IT WAS MINE!!!!!

⤷ hArrysbtch omg! what were the charms??

⤷ lanastyles i did harrys and yn's names with flowers and hearts! but i don't think he really liked it

⤷ harrysmoustache oh no, why do you think so?

⤷ lanastyles after he read what was on them, he showed it into his trousers' pocket

⤷ ynsmybestie no no no no no, the rumours are getting more true with each day

harrysfan84 i love him, man

harryswift he knows that speak now tv is coming, he dressed for the occasion!

——————————————————————————————

harrylot

liked by harryupdates, ynsmybestie and 18 301 others

harrylot "I don't think that anyone is perfect. you meet a lot of people during your lifetime, never knowing which one is gonna turn up being your person. huh? im sorry I cannot hear you. give it up for Lorine!" HARRY INTERACTING WITH A FAN TONIGHT

view all 6 301 comments

harryshoee i saw multiple videos from this interaction and the fan was soooo loud. he just didn't want to answer the question

⤷ ynshands what did they ask him?

⤷ harryshoee i believe it was "have you met your person?" and people around the fan screaming yn's name

harryupdates guys, don't assume anything based on one interaction

ynsmybestie that is concerning, but maybe he just doesn't want to be so public about it?

⤷ ynandhmyparents they were literally making out in the park in London and kissing on TV after yn won French Open. they didn't care, why would they now?

——————————————————————————————

yntennisfan

liked by ynupdates, harryshoee and 23 301 others

yntennisfan GUYS, I AM STRESSED OUT

view all 5 301 comments

yntennisfan UPDATE: SHE DEFENDED THOSE MATCH POINTS!!! WE HAVE TIE-BREAK!!!

yntennisfan UPDATE: GUYS, SHES SERVING FOR A MATCH

yntennisfan SHE FUCKING WON THIS MATCH !!!!!

ynupdates i had five heart attacks during this match

harryupdates she's so good at coming back to her good game!

ynshands AMAZING! I couldn't watch and just listened to the commentary on the radio. they were going crazy!

ynsmybestie she's unbelievable! sooo good

hArrysbtch i love tennis

harrysmoustache she's playing so differently to what she made us used to see

⤷ ynsmybestie i fear its because of that possible breakup

⤷ harrysfan83 harry didn't upload anything about the match like he used to, and he knows how grass is yn's the least favourite surface to play on

⤷ ynupdates can you guys just be happy about her win and stop bringing her relationship back up? thank you.

——————————————————————————————

enews

liked by tennisfan82 and 2 301 492 others

enews No. 1s in the tennis World - YN YSN and Carlos Alcaraz were spotted enjoying each other companies after YN's winning match in Wimbledon. YN has dated Harry Styles for almost three years before they broke up just a month ago. Moving on so quickly? More pictures in our link in bio.

view all 24 201 comments

ynupdates they are friends! can't they have a meal together?

ynsmybestie how i love you people ruining friendships... pathetic

ynshands celebrating her win can't only mean dating, you know?

harrysmoustache sooo, they really broke up? 💔

⤷ hArrysbtch nothing is confirmed, let's just wait

⤷ hArrysbtch yes, I am delusional

——————————————————————————————

ynupdates

liked by ynsmybestie, harrysmoustache and 34 402 others

ynupdates YN VIA HER IG STORY...

view all 7 402 comments

ynsmybestie nonononononono not them, please god no

ynshands jesus, even my breakup didn't hurt me as much as this one

hArrysbtch im a child of this divorce

harryupdates let's give them space to be

harryshoee no, my parents. please let it not be true. please.

ynswiftie guys, maybe she's just celebrating a Spek Now TV release?

⤷ ynsmybestie couldn't she do it with enchanted???

ynandcarlos well, Carlos has a tan skin too

⤷ ynshands oh shut up, respectfully

——————————————————————————————

harryupdates

liked by hArrysbtch, ynupdates and 65 407 others

harryupdates I MET HARRY IN LONDON JUST NOW. do you think he's attending wembley final today?

view all 8 402 comments

ynupdates you finally met him? congratulations darling!

ynupdates and I think he's attending. why would he come back from spain to london?

hArrysbtch he better attends and stop all those ridiculous rumours (yes, i am delusional)

harrysmoustache he looks so good, he can't be single (yes, i am delusional)

harryshoee yn crocheted that hat, i know it (yes, iam delusional)

⤷ ynupdates well, yn does know how to crochet so it is possible

harrysfan63 i also met him today!!!

⤷ harryupdates did you ask him about Wimbledon?

⤷ harrysfan63 yes! he just said "what's that?" with a smirk

⤷ harrysbtch this fucker, he's playing us

——————————————————————————————

harryupdates

liked by ynupdates, ynsmybestie and 82 230 others

harryupdates HARRY VIA HIS IG STORY. HE DIDN'T DELETE IT AFTER FIVE MINUTES. EVEN AFTER THIRTY.

view all 9 302 comments

ynupdates the world is healing

hArrysbtch thank you, harry. thank you, my man. I can still sing to london boy and think about you both

harrysmoustache so, they still together?

ynsmybestie thank fucking God!!!!!!! my parents are still together!

harryshoee my bitches are back!!!

ynandhmyparents i can still shamelessly use my username hehheh

user492 it would be hilarious later getting to know that they are, in fact, not back together

——————————————————————————————

yntennisfan

liked by ynupdates, harrysmoustache and 90 201 others

yntennisfan GUYSSSSSSS WTF WTF WTF. THIS IS YN'S REACTION TO PEOPLE CHEERING AFTER SHE ADMITTED SHE IS ENGAGED!!!!

view all 11 301 comments

yntennisfan it basically went like this: after winning the Wimbledon final yn was giving an interview. during it one of the fans screamed "MARRY ME, YN" and after a little laugh that the audience had yn responded with "I'M ALREADY ENGAGED, ACTUALLY"

yntennisfan the way people screamed!!!!! and then they showed smirking harry!!! does anyone have a picture??

ynupdates she is engaged... she won Wimbledon... oh god

harryupdates engaged... woah

hArrysbtch THE WORLD HEALED

harrysmoustache harry is engaged, do you hear it people?

ynsmybestie love is real, yn won her least comfortable tournament, god is a woman. yes.

harryshoee couldn't imagine a better partner for harry. she is so sweet and cute. they're perfect.

ynshands eat shit you haters that believed in every little rumour

——————————————————————————————

harrystyles

liked by yourinstagram, harryupdates and 17 402 939 others

harrystyles good morning, wimbledon champion fiancée

view all 203 301 comments

yourinstagram hiiii, fiancé

harryupdates how do I react when Harry is posting his partner on main????

ynupdates THEE CHAMPION

hArrysbtch PARENTS

⤷ yourinstagram harrystyles first child is here

⤷ harrystyles that's... fast

⤷ hArrysbtch guys, WTHFKSJEBJDE

annetwist beautiful, beautiful girl ❤️

ynsmybestie still processing the win and engagement and you're killing me with this post, harry. thank you.

——————————————————————————————

yourinstagram

liked by harrystyles, ynupdates, taylorswift, hArrysbtch and 16 930 493 others

yourinstagram my waves meet your shore, ever and evermore

view all 492 201 comments

harrystyles well, it was enchanting to meet you

ynupdates i can't get used to them using taylor's lyrics to express their love for each other

taylorswift Congratulations on the Wimbledon win and your engagement! You are welcome at any of the concerts. Just text me the date you're available!

comment liked by yourinstagram, harrystyles and 132 302 others

harryupdates congratulations!!!!

hArrysbtch mum, dad

[pancakes4two]

sweet nothings

wc: 2.1k

preview: The rest of the world is so eager to view him like an object, assume that just because he spends his life in the public view, he’s somehow devoid of insecurities. But to you, he’s still the same Harry who cried backstage at Wembley after his voice cracked during a solo. The same shy, innocent boy who vomited backstage after his first show, terrified that he’d messed it all up.

An article criticizing Harry blows up on the internet, and it hits him harder than expected. Luckily, you’re there to help pick up the pieces.

MASTERLIST | READ MY LATEST SERIES

Industry disruptors and soul deconstructers, and smooth-talking hucksters out glad-handing each other

And the voices that implore, "You should be doing more," to you I can admit that I'm just too soft for all of it.

—Sweet Nothing, Taylor Swift

———

The article is released on a Friday afternoon. It's absolutely brutal—rips single every creative project Harry's ever done to shreds and leaves no endeavor unscathed. Every sentence is a biting remark, each paragraph swirled with vile accusations. It starts by criticizing his film roles, the creative direction he took in his third album, then accuses him of extorting his own fans. The author questions not only his artistry but his personhood, digs up unverified claims of rudeness and twists them into a narrative of Harry being an egotistical, ungrateful pop star. Within the hour, almost every major news station has picked the story up. It doesn’t matter how far-fetched it is. The internet takes to the author’s vitriol like wildfire, sharing it across social media platforms and online forums. Everyone wants to be the first to say they always knew something wasn’t quite right about him, that it’s about time someone knocked him off his pedestal.

It’s disgusting in every sense of the word. And it hurts even more because Harry is blissfully unaware. He’s asleep beside you now, the two of you having settled into bed to take a quick nap together three hours earlier, when the internet had yet to point their pitchforks towards him. You know he’s been overextending himself lately, still sleeping off the jet lag from tour but unwilling to slow down his life on account of tiredness. He’s always been like that, so dedicated to his music, because to him, putting less than two-hundred percent into the thing he loves most would be a waste. You can hardly remember the last time he’d slept earlier than two after coming home—even without touring commitments, he’s still found a way to keep himself busy—staying late in the studio and meeting with executives from his record label to review the marketing plan for his next album. He’s always thinking about the future, how he can reinvent himself and make sure he can stay doing what he loves for as long as possible.

It’s why he’d deserved this chance to unwind and relax in the quiet of your home. But now, he’s going to wake up to a rogue journalist completely assassinating his character, when all he’s ever wanted to do is sing and make others happy. The way you see it, it’s not the least bit fair.

You look at Harry and brush his curls away from his face gently so as to not wake him. Your phone is still turned on, the article glaring angrily against your palm as you watch him sleep. He looks so peaceful, his arm curled around your waist and his legs tangled with yours as if he can’t bear to be far away from you even in slumber. You wish everyone else could see him like this: soft and vulnerable, his lips upturned ever-so-slightly like he’s dreaming about something particularly pleasant.

The rest of the world is so eager to view him like an object, assume that just because he spends his life in the public view, he’s somehow devoid of insecurities. But to you, he’s still the same Harry who cried backstage at Wembley after his voice cracked during a solo. The same shy, innocent boy who vomited backstage after his first show, terrified that he’d messed it all up. Ten years down the road and he’s gained confidence, for sure. But when he’s not busy being this glittering, hip-wiggling rockstar who moves like he’s got the whole world in the palm of his hand, he’s just Harry. He still wrings his hands nervously before every performance, burns his tongue on hot tea that’s meant to preserve his voice. You remember what he said to you back in June before his first stadium show: I don’t think I’ll ever be able to be someone who doesn’t care about what others think of them. He cares more than the article’s author and the legions of people criticizing his every move online will ever know.

You shuffle forward, closing the gap between your bodies and press a soft kiss into Harry’s forehead. You don’t expect him to stir from it, but it seems he was just about to wake up naturally before you disturbed him, so his eyes slowly open and he smiles when his vision focuses on you. You try to school your expression into something relatively normal. Unfortunately, Harry knows you too well and can immediately tell that something’s off. In any other situation, you’d be impressed by how well he can read you. Even with his mind suspended between alertness and sleep, he knows you’re upset and reaches for your hand in concern.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Harry asks, rubbing circles into the back of your hand. He knows the repetitive motion grounds you when you’re anxious, so he continues to graze your skin with his thumb, willing you to relax.

“H—“ you start to say, but you’re cut off by the sound of Harry’s ringtone. He reaches over you to grab his phone from the nightstand, his other hand still clasped with yours. When he falls back into the mattress, you manage to get a glance at his phone screen. It’s displaying an incoming call from Jeff. Fuck.

Harry accepts the call, still ignorant to the situation. His gaze flickers over your face as the line connects—he's clearly still worried about you.

"Hey, H," Jeff says. You can hear him sigh through the phone, "have you been online recently?"

"Been asleep for the past," Harry pauses to check the time, "three hours, so that would be a no."

"Shit," Jeff says, sounding significantly less collected than he usually does. "Okay. Um, do me a favor and stay off of social media for now. I'll call you when it's all been resolved."

"What?" Harry sits up slightly at the sound of Jeff's voice, running a hand through his hair. "I'm confused. Is everything alright?"

"Listen, it's fine. I've got it all under control, just... don't go on Instagram, or Twitter, or anything."

"Jeff," Harry groans, "don't be cryptic. You're obviously dealing with something that's got to do with me, don't you think I have a right to know what's going on?"

There's silence over line for a bit, Jeff clearly ruminating over whether or not to tell Harry the truth. You chew on your lip worriedly, waiting for his voice to come through again.

"There's an article that’s been published online," Jeff starts, "and it's highly critical of you. It's circulating through social media right now, and we're trying to put a stop to it. I've got a meeting with your label's attorneys in a few minutes, but seriously H, for your own good please do not read it. We'll have it taken down by the end of the day."

"Oh," Harry blinks, clearly caught off-guard. You can't blame him for it. People don't normally wake up from naps and find out half the internet has turned against them. "Alright. That's fine. Um, call me if you need anything. Good luck."

"H, I'm serious, don't—" Jeff begins, but Harry hangs up before he can finish his sentence. He's already sat up fully in bed, back leaning against the headboard as he types away furiously on his phone. You don't try to stop him from Googling the article; he deserves to see what's been written. You just sit up next to him and silently run a hand down his arm, tracing where the fabric of his t-shirt ends and the familiar ink on his skin begins. You reach for him and let him know that he has you to lean on.

"You know what they've written isn't true," you whisper, "you know that." It’s all you can say for now.

Harry doesn't respond to that, his eyes too busy scanning through the article. He spends the next seven minutes reading every word silently, taking each criticism and judgement in. When he’s finished, Harry shuts his phone off with a click and sets it down silently on the bedside table. You avert your eyes from him, afraid that if you look up you might be able to see every morsel of hurt on his face.

In the end, Harry’s the first to break the silence.

“Who approved that?” Is what he says, his voice faltering almost imperceptibly at the end. It’s quiet enough that only someone who knows him as well as you do would be able to notice.

“H,” you respond, splaying your hand across his chest and letting his head fall gently onto your shoulder.

“None of that is real. It’s not a reflection of who you are.” You say that with conviction. He’s got the most beautiful soul, does everything with so much heart. He’s so full of love that at times you worry he might burst from it. It’s completely unfair what he’s been reduced to.

“You can only read shitty things about yourself for so long before you start to believe them,” Harry says brokenly, and his composure gives away then. He takes a trembling breath in and you feel a wetness start to form on the sleeve of your shirt. You don’t have to look at him to know he’s crying.

It’s in moments like these where his façade starts to crumble, and you see him transform back into the boy you once knew, before the whole world knew his name. Spending every day terrified that at any given moment, people wouldn’t want to listen to his voice anymore and the rug would be pulled from under his feet. Fearing that he might wake up one day and have to return to Holmes Chapel, even though he’s always been too big for the small town he grew up in.

“Love,” you say, pressing a hand to his cheek. His skin is flushed and you can see the ghost of a tear falling down the side of his face. “How is anyone meant to believe anything they’ve said is valid, when they don’t know you? I know exactly who you are, and the person they’re talking about in that article is not it.”

Harry sniffles at that, pulling himself closer to you. You see him glance at his phone, so you turn it over facedown and revert your full attention back to him.

“You’re so incredibly special,” you continue, carding your hands soothingly through his hair, “you’ve achieved an immense amount of success in the last ten years. You’ve impacted so many people, used your platform to do so much good. There’s always going to be people who want more from you, who criticize and tell you you’re not doing enough. But you are doing enough, H. Seriously. You’re only human, and it’s not your fault that others expect you to be more than that. And even so, I think you make a pretty exceptional human already. You know how many people walk up to me when I’m alone and ask me to tell you that you’ve changed their lives? There’s so many that I’d lost track of the number about seven years ago.”

Harry opens his mouth to say something in response, but you pat his face gently and give him a smile as if to say, I’m not finished yet.

“And beyond that, who cares about the industry, about what faceless people online have to say about you? At the end of the day, you’re enough. I’m not here for the Harry Styles who fills stadiums or commands attention at movie premieres. I’m here for the Harry who accidentally leaves the coffee pot on for too long because he’s too busy trying to get me to dance with him in the kitchen. For the Harry who keeps movie stubs and pebbles deep inside his pockets because he wants to keep a souvenir to remind him of every little thing we’ve done together. The Harry who’s a huge sentimental sap, who’s got the biggest heart in the world.”

You finish with a sigh, gazing at Harry earnestly and hoping that he can feel the gravity of your words.

“You’re right,” Harry smiles softly, clasping a hand around your wrist, voice slightly raspy still. “I shouldn’t let it get to my head. It’s just hard sometimes, you know? I feel like I might be a little too soft for all of it.”

“I love your softness and vulnerability,” you say, “And getting upset when people are dragging your name through the mud is perfectly normal. I can’t even begin to imagine how overwhelming it is for you. But you’ll always have me right here beside you. And trust me, I’d be going to war for you over Twitter right now if I knew Jeff wouldn’t kill me for doing so.”

Harry laughs at that, loud and open in the way that you love. “My Princess Charming,” he says, wrapping his arms around you in a crushing hug. “Forever prepared to defend my honor.”

True to his word, Jeff and Columbia’s legal team get the article taken down in record time. They say Harry’s allowed to post a response to it, if he wants, but he’s never been one to start fights over the internet so he settles on this instead.

A single picture, posted to his Instagram of your hands, your fingers intertwined like the two of you were built to be extensions of each other. The caption is simple. It reads:

I find myself running home to your sweet nothings

Outside, they’re push and shoving; you’re in the kitchen humming

All that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing.

He turns the comments off, not wanting to entertain any further commentary. It’s a picture meant for just the two of you, a reminder that all the noise coming from the outside means nothing when you have each other. It’s sweet. It’s nothing. And yet somehow, it’s everything you’ll ever need.

———

reblogs & feedback are highly welcomed and appreciated <3

TAGLIST: @crazygirlinthisworld​ @grapejuice-rry​ @b-reads-things​ @s8tellite @michellekstyles​ @vrittivsanghavi @alienorknight​ @flwrmuse 

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

…the colossal screw up of Archie's birth announcement

I was not following the royals back then, so I am completely out of the loop with what was happening when Archie was born. There’s so much noise and theories littering this space, that it’s hard to delineate what is actually the screw up and where the theories start and how far plausible goes before it turns into crazy. Do you have a record or write-up you can point me to?

Totally okay if you want to just ignore this ask, though. I know this topic invites unhelpful inputs from people.

Hey, everyone, it's Wednesday! Guess what that means...yup, a super long research project to the dulcet sounds of Top Chef.

I think I'll just give you the whole timeline and then some since there's a lot of debate and discussion around both things.

The Pregnancy

October 12, 2018: Princess Eugenie marries Jack Brooksbanks. Meghan wears a dark navy dress and coat. Only the top buttons of her coat are done, causing immediate speculation that she's expecting.

October 15, 2018: Kensington Palace announces that Harry and Meghan are expecting and the baby is due in the springtime. The royal rota is informed by Jason Knauf over a cell phone in the airport, as they were already in Australia to begin coverage of the Sussexes' tour.

Now, usually when the palace makes these kind of announcements, there's a separate briefing for the royal rota with a few additional details for them to write about. In Rebecca English's article about the pregnancy announcement, she reveals that Meghan had had her 12-week scan, the baby is due in late April 2019, and that they were telling everyone at Eugenie's wedding. The article also reveals that Meghan will visit Tonga and Fiji despite the Zika risk (pregnant women are advised not to travel to areas with the Zika virus due to the risk Zika poses to their baby); it's a controversial decision.

October 15, 2018: Harry and Meghan are papped arriving in Sydney, leaving the airport. Meghan is holding two purple binders, leading to speculation that they are expecting boy-girl twins.

Pippa Middleton gives birth to her first child on October 15th (though it isn't announced for a bit), stealing some of the Sussexes' coverage.

October 15 - 31, 2018: Harry and Meghan are in Australia for the Sydney Invictus Games. They also tour New Zealand, Tonga, and Fiji. There is a ton of gossip and tea about the tour. Meghan is also photographed with a very inconsistent baby belly - sometimes it's there, sometimes it's not.

Also during this time (and into November) is the Sussex press tsunami when these stories were breaking:

"What Meghan wants, Meghan gets"

Meghan smells tastes eggs that aren't there

Meghan made Kate cry

Sussexes are moving out of Kensington Palace

The Sussexes' office is moving to Buckingham Palace; they'll be part of the resource pool that also represents Anne, Yorkies, Edward, Sophie, Kents, and Gloucesters.

Sussexes are leaving The Royal Foundation and setting up The SussexRoyal Foundation.

November 24, 2018: The palace announces that Harry and Meghan are moving to Frogmore Cottage. They will renovate the property from five staff apartments to ten bedrooms, a nursery, a gym, and a yoga studio.

December 18, 2018: Meghan makes a surprise appearance at the British Fashion Awards to recognize Clare Waight Keller (her wedding dress designer) as the British Womenswear Designer of the Year. Allegedly she crashed the event unexpectedly. She is photographed groping her belly the whole time while on stage presenting.

December 25, 2018: During the Christmas walkabout after church, Meghan tells fans that she is "nearly there". It causes confusion because the palace had briefed reporters two months earlier that it was an April baby.

**Anon, this Christmas walk where Meghan says "nearly there" re the baby's due date is where it starts veering off the rails.**

January 14, 2019: Meghan, with Harry, visits Birkenhead for an away day. At the end of the visit when they are leaving, Meghan is observed by some to have lost her belly while developing a new bulge around her mid/lower thighs. (YMMV.)

January 16, 2019: Meghan visits the Mayhew Animal House during the day, in which some people claim to observe her belly folding in and then popping out and others claim to hear a loud popping noise when she stands up. (YMMV.) Later, in the evening, she attends a Cirque du Soleil performance at Royal Albert Hall. This is the night that, as she tells Oprah in March 2021, she felt suicidal and had been crying all day up until just before arriving at the Hall.

February 15 - 20, 2019: Meghan is in New York City to attend a baby shower thrown in her honor by Serena Williams. She stays at the Mark Hotel. Abigail Spencer merches Away luggage. Jess Mulroney and Amal Clooney are some of the guests. Markus Anderson unexpectedly shows up and allegedly, Meghan is upset to see him. There's a ton of paparazzi, which Meghan loves, and the Mark Hotel ropes off the sidewalk for her, which she also loves.

There is a CDAN blind about the baby shower, alleging that Meghan had asked (maybe demanded) the BRF for one but they refused because it's not what they do.

The baby shower causes a lot of questions. There's one instance where Meghan returns from a night out holding a large purse over her stomach area, which is unusual because in every photo since October, Meghan is always showing off her belly.

Meghan leaves NYC by a private jet via Teterboro Airport, assumed to be Amal Clooney's private jet.

This is the end of the Meghan/Amal friendship, as on March 15, 2019, Clarence House announces a partnership between Prince Charles and Amal Clooney establishing the Amal Clooney Award from Prince's Trust International.

February 23 - 25, 2019: Harry and Meghan are in Morocco for an official visit by request of the Foreign Office.

There's speculation that Meghan was planning to attend the Oscars (which are held on February 24, 2019) and allegedly, the BRF caught wind of it and created the Morocco tour to keep her focused on royal work.

Edited to add: After checking my spreadsheet, I realized I missed one - related to speculation/gossip about Meghan attending the Oscars, there’s additional speculation that the BRF planned the Morocco trip to force Meghan to come home from NYC. (I kind of suspect this may be the origin of “they took my passport” claims as told to Oprah because supposedly the palace was upset she had the baby shower and upset she’d gone out of the country to do so.)

March 5, 2019: When Harry and Meghan crash Charles's celebration of the 50th anniversary of his Prince of Wales investiture, Meghan tells people she is "nearly there" still, according to Us Weekly. Us Weekly also reports that a Sussex source had briefed them that the baby was due in the late March/early April timeframe.

March 14, 2019: Commonwealth Day Service. Kensington Palace indirectly confirms that this is Meghan's last appearance before the baby arrives and she is beginning maternity leave.

March 19, 2019: Meghan suspends her maternity leave to visit the New Zealand embassy with Harry to lay flowers in a tribute to victims of a mosque shooting. Meghan, who is photographed cradling her belly, is also photographed squatting down with knees and feet together, causing questions as some observe that it looks like her belly has completely disappeared.

April 2, 2019: Meghan, with Harry, is papped visiting an apothecary shop.

April 4, 2019: Harry and Meghan are confirmed to have moved into Frogmore Cottage.

The Birth

Note: All items italicized and in red are timings we learned after the fact. Items in "regular" font (not italicized and black) is the timing that happened live on May 6.

May 5, 2019, late in the evening: Meghan and Doria are driven to the Portland Hospital.

May 6, 2019, 5:26am GMT: Meghan gives birth after two epidurals According to Harry in Spare, it was a traumatic birth, potentially complicated, but an emergency c-section was not discussed with Meghan as Harry declined to tell her what was going on. Also, Harry gets high on laughing gas and the nurse disapprove.

May 6, 2019, 7:26am GMT: Harry, Meghan, and Baby Boy Sussex are home from the hospital (from Spare).

May 6, 2019, 1:30pm GMT: Sky News is selected as the pool broadcaster for the birth announcement when a Sussex spokesperson (probably Sara Latham) reaches out to Sky News to coordinate coverage for a statement Harry will make soon.

May 6, 2019, 1:50pm GMT: The palace announces Meghan has gone into labor and is at the hospital. Sky News has the exclusive story owing to the earlier conversation with Sussex representatives.

May 6, 2019, 2:15pm GMT: Harry records his statement about the baby's birth from a stable in Windsor. He speaks about the baby being born early in the morning. Horses make an appearance.

May 6, 2019, 2:37pm GMT: Harry and Meghan announce the birth of Baby Boy Sussex. The palace follows up with more details, including that the baby was born at 5:26am.

The palace's announcement raises questions, as the language used to describe the birth is different from the language used on all the other royal birth announcements.

The traditional birth announcement: {Title} has been safely delivered of a {son or daughter} at {time} today. Her Royal Highness and her child are both doing well. {signatures of medical staff} {date}

This language has been used for the Cambridges (George, Charlotte, and Louis), the Waleses (William and Harry), the Yorks (Beatrice and Eugenie), the Phillipses (Peter and Zara), the Edinburghs (Charles, Anne, Andrew, and Edward), the Brooksbanks (August and Ernie), and the Wessexes (Louise and James).

The Sussexes' birth announcement: The Queen and the Royal Family are delighted at the news that Her Royal Highness The Duchess of Sussex was safely delivered of a son at 0526am today. Her Royal Highness and her child are both doing well. 06 May, 2019.

Immediately causing questions was the verb choice "was" (versus "has been"). From a grammar perspective, "was" is used to describe something that had already happened at a specific point in the past. "Has been" is a verb tense used to talk about an ongoing event - something that started in the past but is still happening. Looking at the language in the birth announcements, and examining it through the grammar only:

When George's birth was announced, Kate was still in the birthing process but it was a safe delivery. Which makes sense; birth doesn't end when the baby pops out - there's afterbirth, there's the hormone evacuation (for lack of a better word), there's the organs moving back into place, etc. She's still in the hospital receving care.

When Archie's birth was announced, Meghan had already completed giving birth. She was no longer in the hospital, already at home.

Causing even bigger questions was the missing medical staff.

Reporters immediately begin asking questions about the timing of the announcements, where the baby was born, who delivered the baby, and why everyone was told she was in labor when she had already given birth.

May 6, 2019, 2:40pm GMT: Harry's pre-recorded statement with Sky News is broadcast. When he begins speaking, the chyron says "Meghan is in labor." After he announces the baby's birth "early this morning," the chyron changes to "Meghan has given birth."

May 7, 2019, 12:28pm GMT: Palace officials apologize for the bungled birth announcement but there are no explanations or clarifications made.

May 8, 2019: Harry and Meghan announce the baby's name, Archie Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor. They have a photocall with the baby in St. George's Hall, Windsor Castle, in which Harry says the infamous quote "babies change so much in two weeks." Later, they take photos with The Queen, Prince Philip, and Doria.

The photocall and the photos aren't without controversy. Royal-watchers and Windsor locals pinpoint two: May 8th is actually a very wet and overcast day in Windsor, so how did they get sunlight streaming in through the windows? And second (admittedly this one I don't understand), there's a question about either The Queen's clothes or the timing of the photo - she's supposed to be at the Royal Windsor Horse Show? Something to do with horses? - that people are confused by.

May 9, 2024: Harry goes to The Hague for Invictus Games 2020 kickoff events. (It has echoes of Charles leaving Diana just hours after Harry is born to go play polo.)

Afterwards

May 12, 2019: Mother's Day in the US. The Sussexes post a picture of Meghan holding Archie's feet in a field of forget-me-nots.

May 17, 2019: Archie's birth certificate is released. Harry doesn't have the right title.

June 6, 2019: Archie's birth certificate is updated to correct Harry's title and change Meghan's name from Rachel Meghan Her Royal Highness The Duchess of Sussex to Her Royal Highness The Duchess of Sussex.

June 8, 2019: Trooping the Colors. Meghan pauses her maternity leave to attend. She and Harry ride in a carriage with Kate and Camilla. Six things happen that everyone notices:

Meghan stares down Kate many times throughout the carriage procession.

When the royals are coming out onto the balcony for the flypast, Kate - carrying Louis (in his balcony debut) - walks out towards the right side of the balcony, by Andrew, while William veers to the left. William calls to Kate and she turns to join him, George, and Charlotte on the left side of the balcony. Harry and Meghan later come out on the right side, near to where the Cambridges would have been.

The Queen comes out onto the balcony and Meghan sees an opening to move in next to her, but then Andrew suddenly moves in, blocking Meghan. Anne moves in next to Andrew behind The Queen, effectively blocking the Sussexes from moving in.

When Meghan turns to speak to Harry, he sternly tells her to turn around. This happens twice. The second time, Meghan does an awkward shuffle to turn around and she starts rapidly blinking her eyes and clenching her jaw.

When The Queen is leaving the balcony after the flypast, Harry and Meghan bow/curtsy, suggesting that they were late arriving to Buckingham Palace before the parade to have properly greeted The Queen.

Meghan tries to speak to George as he passes by and he throws up a 'talk to the hand'-esque wave at her.

Allegedly, Harry and Meghan were set to have their own carriage at Trooping (as they did in 2019) but the BRF had concerns they would be booed and were thrown in with Kate and Camilla at the last minute. Allegedly, Harry didn't like this because he knew it was a demotion to go from their own carriage to riding backwards in someone else's carriage; when there's a group riding together, protocol requires the senior royals to face forward with junior royals facing backwards.

Also Meghan talks to herself.

I can't find a good video of the balcony so if anyone has one, please share!

June 17, 2019: Father's Day. The Sussexes post a new photo of Harry holding baby Archie. Harry is flipping everyone off and Archie's face is partially obscured.

June 27, 2019: SussexRoyal Instagram announces that the Sussexes will travel to South Africa in autumn. They indirectly announce that Archie will join them.

July 6, 2019: Archie's christening at Windsor Castle. Harry and Meghan decline to announce who his godparents are, citing privacy. The portraits are the first time we see Archie's face in full. They raise questions. Some people observe that the perspective/scale of William and Kate is off from the rest of the group. Others observe that Kate's chair is missing a leg. Others observe that the reflections behind the Spencer sisters and Doria are off.

Ahead of the christening service, William and Kate are papped driving into Windsor Castle. In the pap photo, both are wearing blue; Kate a blue dress or sweater and William a light blue casual shirt but in the released portraits, William is wearing a starched white shirt and Kate a pink outfit. There's some discussion that they changed at Windsor before the service but there's also something wonky going on with the metadata in the photos.

July 10, 2019: William and Harry play polo for charity. Kate, the kids, and Meghan attend. Meghan brings Archie. The lack of interaction between Kate and Meghan gets noticed quickly, as does Meghan seeming not to know what to do with Archie: she holds him for the whole outing, he seems poorly dressed (no hat or sun covering), and he doesn't move/Meghan doesn't change his position.

Allegedly, Meghan wasn't supposed to go to the polo match. Supposedly she had heard that Chelsy was there and hightailed it over with Archie to keep her man in line. (Yuck, I felt gross just writing that.)

July 14, 2019: Meghan breaks maternity leave again to attend the European premiere of The Lion King: Live-Action edition in London with Harry, who cancelled an event with the Royal Marines for this. Harry is caught on a hot mike pitching Bob Isner (Disney's CEO) about Meghan doing a voiceover.

July 26, 2019: According to The Sun, Harry and Meghan's neighbors in Windsor have been sent rules for interacting with the royals that include don't approaching the couple, speak only when spoken to, don't pet the dogs, and don't ask about the baby. Buckingham Palace denies that Harry and Meghan knew this was happening.

July 28, 2019: Meghan breaks her maternity leave again to guest-edit British Vogue's September 2019 edition, Forces for Change. There's controversy:

Allegedly Meghan was asked by the BRF if she was doing this and she kept telling them no.

Harry interviewed Jane Goodall for the edition, in which he made a comment that he and Meghan were only having two children for the environment. (The Sussexes eventually get some kind of award for this.)

Meghan interviews Michelle Obama over a lunch of fish tacos. It turns out that the interview was conducted over email.

Accusations of plagiarism, as an Australian magazine already did this something like this with a very similar front cover layout.

Also, just because: Inside Meghan Markle's disastrous attempt to edit Vogue magazine - new book 'Meghan, Harry and the war between the Windsors.'

And throughout July and August, Harry and Meghan are getting flack for racking up private air miles despite being environmentalists. They do four back-to-back private flights across Europe with Archie. On one of these trips, they meet David Sherborne, Elton John's lawyer and off to the lawsuit races we go.

The Queen invites them to Balmoral to join the family but the Sussexes decline, allegedly because Archie was too young to fly. (Mm-hmm, and then they take him on four flights to Europe.)

September 6, 2019: The Sussexes' itinerary for their Africa tour is released. As part of the tour, Harry will visit Angola and copy Diana's famous de-mining walk.

September 12, 2019: Meghan's maternity leave ends with an announcement introducing Smart Set, a capsule collection from her friends that benefit Smart Works. Meghan gives a speech that ends awkwardly when she says she needs to leave because it's "feed time."

September 23 - October 2, 2019: Harry, Meghan, and Archie travel to South Africa, Malawi, Angola, and Botswana. Meghan tries to merch Archie's clothes from H&M but it gets shut down pretty quickly. Archie's first official engagement is to meet Archbishop Desmond Tutu, which SussexRoyal cringely calls 'Arch, meet Arch.' Meghan gives her infamous "no one asked me if I'm okay" interview in which she discusses her post-partum challenges as a "young mom" and her mental health distress. Harry gets in a tiff with one of the royal reporters, snapping at her "you know what you did" when she tries to ask a clarifying question.

Princess Beatrice announces her engagement on September 26th and it steals some of the Sussexes' coverage.

And after the tour (or on the last day of the tour? I don't remember and it's late), Harry announces that he's suing the British press and it is chaos.

November 7, 2019: Harry and Meghan attend the opening of the Field of Remembrance ceremony at Westminster Abbey. Camilla was supposed to join, but backed out at the last minute citing a cold. When Meghan is pictured in overly glamorous hair and makeup for the event, speculation begins that they are recording the work for a documentary and that Camilla pulled out to avoid being in the footage.

November 9, 2019: The royal family attends the Festival of Remembrance at Royal Albert Hall. Harry and Meghan are shoved into the back row behind a pillar, barely visible on camera. (It's a demotion, because in 2018 they were seated behind Camilla.)

November 10, 2019: Remembrance Day/Sunday. The Queen, Camilla, and Kate watch from the center balcony. Meghan watches from a side balcony between Sophie and Tim. She holds her composure at being excluded from the 'main' balcony better this year than last year (in 2018, she kept stealing weepy or vengeful looks (YMMV) at the center balcony while she was sidelined with the wife of the President of Germany) but she still clenches her jaw.

This is Meghan's final entry in the Court Circular (ever).

December 20, 2019: The Sussexes announce they will spend the Christmas and New Year's holidays privately in Canada.

November 17, 2019: Harry's last entry in the Court Circular before Megxit, suggesting he and Meghan peaced out to Canada shortly after this (I'm too lazy to look up if there were any papwalks or other private engagements - another day, maybe). His final events are January 16, 2020 (a rugby thing); Philip's funeral; the service of thanksgiving for the Platinum Jubilee; and The Queen's Funeral.

And if you made it this far: congratulations! My asks are back open.

[gurugirl]

A Balancing Act | Ch. 4*

Series Summary: Harry is a famous, rich, handsome, pop star and he’s been in therapy since his boy band days. When he meets Y/n, a beautiful and successful artist, he cannot take no for an answer when it comes to her. He’s determined to make her his even if he has to bend the rules a little at first.

Chapter Summary: Harry brings Y/n with him on his European tour but when Y/n decides she needs a break to figure things out Harry is beside himself. He's sure she's going to break up with him but she's sure he doesn't want the same things she does. When they finally talk will they both be on the same page?

Warning: 18+ only, NSFW, smut, dom/sub dynamic, angst, DDlg kink,

Word Count: 12.5k

Commissioned by @cinnamonone (thank you!! xoxo)

A Balancing Act Masterlist

A balancing act requires soft poise and harmonious alignment. The joining of differing needs and wants to acquiesce for a perfect, or nearly perfect outcome. One can’t have more than the other. All sides must be used to make a point. The leveling of opinion and decision coupled with the desire to satisfy the ideal effect.

“Put that down. It doesn’t do any good.”

Y/n looked up at Harry who’d placed his palm over her phone to cover her screen. She was trying not to obsess about the pictures of herself. There were so many. And now that she’d been seeing Harry for a few months and was on tour with him in Europe, the gossip abounded. It was wild how quickly everyone learned her name, her age, the fact that she had been married, where her art pieces were showing, and even what kind of car she drove. It was… a lot.

“I know but they’ve caught me in the worst outfit and angle and these comments-“

“Please don’t do that,” Harry spoke as he sat down next to her and slid the phone from her hands, “You’re a knockout. I’ve never once looked at you and thought otherwise. None of that matters. Okay? It’s us. You and me.”

She nodded as he pulled her into his side and kissed the top of her head, “I know. But still. I’m just not used to any attention. Not like this.”

“The best thing you can do is to ignore it and don’t look at the articles.”

But of course, that was easier said than done. Going to Europe with him had been a whirlwind. So many fans and friends and his family, day trips, flights, drivers, shopping, studio sessions, meetings, rushing, concerts, flowers, kissing, late-night talking, falling deeper for the man, and sex. There was a lot of sex.

It was stressful. It was fun, though, too. And she enjoyed spending time with Harry in his world but there was very little time for herself in her own world. She didn’t put paint, or ink on canvas the entire time she was with Harry in Europe. She never found the time, even though she had downtime, her inspiration waned. When Harry was in the studio writing, jamming, and making music she didn’t normally go. In fact, after going with him only twice she realized how awkward it was for her to be there. He was working with his band and his team. She was of no use there with him. She felt like she was just in the way. And she didn’t want to be the kind of girlfriend that followed him around like a puppy everywhere.

So she stayed in the hotel or in the villa or wherever they were staying depending on the leg of the trip. She’d venture out to go to cafes by herself, do some shopping, or just to walk around but it became a game of dodging people on the street who started to recognize her. Pictures and videos were taken without her consent. Later she’d see some of the photos in gossip articles and comments saying how she called the paps on herself because why on earth would anyone want a photo of her?

The hate came quickly. The vitriol for a woman that no one knew. Her social media accounts were stalked, screenshots taken and posted on other social media accounts about her and her art and what kind of person she might be based on old posts she’d long forgotten.

One old post on Instagram was of her out on her bachelorette party before she was married. It was a series of six photos. She was wearing something a little bit skimpy, but nothing too crazy. Most of the pictures showed her with a drink in hand, one of her dancing with some man she didn’t know, and the last one was of her the next morning with mangled hair and smeared makeup, a mimosa raised upward, and the words printed over the photo ‘hair of the dog’.

That one got a lot of attention. She was an alcoholic party girl, too fat to be wearing something so revealing, ugly, a slut (for dancing with a man), and the worst insult was “no wonder her ex divorced her”.

Yes, Harry’s fans learned that she had been married. Some knew that her husband had died (she wasn’t sure how they knew). But most assumed she was divorced because she didn’t post publicly about the tragic loss she endured. It was no one’s business, but for people who didn’t know her to make wild assumptions about what had occurred in her marriage was the most hurtful.

But on the other side of that were the fans that simply refused to believe he could be dating Y/n. Many were convinced Harry was either already in a relationship with an ex-band member from his boyband days or it was all for public relations. That her “team” and his “team” were in on something together for publicity. Because that would be the only explanation. Harry would never stoop so low as to date someone like Y/n. Someone who looked like Y/n. Couldn’t be. The Harry “they knew” would never.

Then of course there were those that thought she was simply using Harry’s fame to boost her own popularity in the art world. She was a leech, a sneak, conniving… It all hurt. She wasn’t sure she could stomach much more. And yes, it was true that interest in her art was boosted. Which she really didn’t like because it was more to the fact that “this is a piece of art painted by Harry Style’s girlfriend” rather than a painting that was pleasing to the eye and worth the price tag.

And Harry’s late nights at the studio and after a concert were tiresome. She had been catapulted into this strange reality with a famous man that she felt herself falling for. But how did she fit in with it all? She couldn’t see herself finding her place with him. It all felt very temporary. And the fact that she’d lost the inspiration to create herself was troublesome. The plan was that she could still paint and travel with him and they’d get to be together. She didn’t have to stay home to paint. It was supposed to be easy. But it wasn’t.

But as awful as all that was, she and Harry got closer. He’d arrive late to their bed, crawling over her and wrapping her up in his arms. Normally she’d wake up and nuzzle into him and sigh as they both fell asleep. Sometimes Harry wasn’t ready to go to sleep and he was very persuasive. If he wanted her, well, he had her. She looked forward to, with impatience, having sex with Harry.

Harry had changed her entire view on sex. It was nothing like she’d ever experienced before. Prior to Harry, sex was just sex. It was usually good. Sometimes she’d orgasm. But with Harry, it wasn’t just sex. It was the joining of two separate beings in an act that was vulnerable, exciting, novel, and made Y/n’s heart thrash about in her chest from nerves and thrill. She hadn’t realized how addicted she’d become to what he did. How he handled her body and her mind.

Usually, though, she and Harry had sex during the day. With the sun in the sky, curtains open, and people milling about. She had always been used to nighttime, lights out, on her marital bed sex. Harry liked to have sex anywhere. And he liked to see it all. All of her bits. He’d kiss and praise and then spank her if she tried to hide herself. They had fun together. Sex hadn’t ever been so fun. And she slowly started to see her body in a different light.

After his last show in Paris, she went to his dressing room, like she always did after a show, and he scooped her into his arms and kissed her broadly on the lips in front of everyone. He was hard.

A small gasp fell from her lips as she craned her neck back to look up at him in surprise. He only winked down at her, swiftly turned her around, and placed his hands on her shoulders. He was literally using her body to block his erection from view of his bandmates and the event staff.

When Mitch and Sarah finally made their way to their shared dressing room Harry told his assistant he didn’t need help and dragged her to his big couch after locking the door.

“Need you to take your panties off right now,” Harry spoke as he unbuttoned his pants and kept his eyes on her.

Y/n was wearing a cute maxi dress that was comfy and easy to dance in. She learned that she needed to wear clothes that were comfortable at Harry’s concerts because there was lots of dancing. But she also wanted to look cute because there was never a shortage of photos of her, no matter how much she hated that part. And if she wasn’t dancing she was a fake, a bad girlfriend, a fat blob. Oh, but of course, even if she did dance then that meant she was trying too hard, making herself look ridiculous, and then there was the odd comment about how she was too large to be attempting to dance at all.

She pushed those thoughts down as she lifted the bottom of her dress upward and slid her panties down her legs as Harry pulled a small belt with a ball at the center out of his bag. His pants were undone but his underwear was bulging at the crotch, his cock pressing outward with strain. He stood over her where she was sat on the couch and took her panties from her hands and then motioned for her to turn around, “Face the wall, get on your knees.”

“Harry what are you-“ her words turned into a yelp as he smacked her bottom.

“Do you fucking never learn?” He leaned in and spoke quietly, his voice deep and dark, “You’ll be getting paddled tonight for that mistake. Address me properly.”

Cursing under her breath she squeezed her eyes closed. She didn’t know what it was that didn’t allow her to so easily fall into just calling him Daddy like he wanted. She needed lots of reminders and her bruised bottom was proof of all of her forgetful little moments.

Part of her secretly loved it. Enjoyed the thrill of needing to be corrected and not simply giving in to him all the time.

“Sorry. Daddy. What are you doing?” Her tone clearly sardonic. 

Harry raised his brows and shook his head, ignoring her mouthiness, “I’m going to fuck you against the couch and gag you so no one hears you. Now, turn around pretty girl.”

She pulled herself to her knees and turned so her palms were clutching the leather at the top of the couch and immediately felt Harry’s hands pulling her dress up so her bum was fully exposed and issued another sharp swat to her left side. She jolted in shock before turning to watch Harry behind her.

Harry brought his hands up, her panties in hand, and swiftly pulled the material over her eyes, tying the sides to the back of her head to keep it in place.

“Uh, those are expensive! You’ll stretch them!” She countered as the material hung over her sight.

Harry chuckled darkly and she felt his lips at her ear, “Who bought them for you, baby? I’ll buy you more. Don’t worry about it. Now, keep that mouth open.”

She opened her mouth quickly and felt the silicon ball take its place in her mouth, as he adjusted the buckle to the back of her head. She was unable to see or speak as she was pushed forward, her chest being pressed into the couch. Her bottom was still uncovered and she felt the cool air of the dressing room on her skin as Harry gently caressed her flesh down to where her legs were bent at her knees and over the backs of her calves and ankles before spreading her legs further apart.

“Keep your hands on the wall behind the couch, like this,” Harry moved his palms over her arms until he reached her wrists and pulled her arms out so she kept her hands flat on the wall, causing her back to arch the slightest.

“Good girl. So hot. Unbelievable baby. Daddy’s gonna have a taste now.”

She couldn’t see much or speak at all but she could certainly hear and feel. And the moment Harry’s tongue licked up through her crease her mind shifted into another gear. Harry had eaten her out in this position before. Behind her, his nose at her bum. At first, it gave her a lot of hesitancy, worried she smelled or tasted odd. But he always insisted she was delicious and he could eat her for dinner every night for the rest of his life. His reassurances had her at ease, but it still always gave her pause.

Harry moaned into her pussy as he licked and kissed. His hands were on her ass, spreading her apart as he softly licked, licked, licked… wet and hot from clit to ass, from clit to ass, clit to ass… He spat over her and stuffed two fingers into her cunt and she squealed into the gag, the sound hardly heard in the room. Harry chuffed a laugh at her muffled noises.

Soon she was soppy and achy. Harry noticed how she was pushing herself back into him. That’s where he liked to get her. To the point she was seeking her own pleasure. Where she was so worked up she wanted more.

Harry sat back and stood from the couch and pulled his cock out from his underwear. He pressed his hips into her bottom and brushed his hands over her waist, pushing her dress higher, “Daddy needs his cock milked now. So fucking horny for you, sweet girl.”

She grunted in relief when he pushed into her. It was always a welcome moment. To have his dick inside of her, parting her insides and nudging into her cervix. He was curved in such a way that his wide cock pushed into her front wall on each stroke anytime she was in this position while he was fucking into her.

She kept her hands on the wall as he pounded into her and she steadied herself the best she could but Harry was strong and he always went in with such force that it caused her a good jolt forward on each snap of his hips. Delicious.

When his long fingers wrapped around the front of her neck he squeezed the sides and slowed his plunges, “Wish everyone could hear us. Could hear how filthy your pussy gets when I fuck it. How creamy you are. Wish they could hear how it sounds to have my cock slipping deep into your wet hole.”

Y/n felt her cheeks burn and her head get foggy under the pressure of his fingers on her throat. His thrusts increased again and the couch rocked under them into the paper-thin wall Y/n used to keep herself held up.

A knock at the door and a muffled voice from behind had Harry slowing down but never stopping, “M’busy! Be out in a bit!”

She couldn’t hear whatever was said from behind the door because her ears were ringing. Harry’s cock inside of her gave her tunnel vision. She almost didn’t care if anyone heard at that point. Her body felt so good, her pussy being worked open and split down the middle, her guts rearranged, her ass smacked, throat choked.

“Fans want me out there, but I needed you first didn’t I baby?” Harry’s thrusts were sloppy and harsh as he panted his words, “Daddy wants to fuck his come into you so you’ll be out there with everyone while my sperm drips out of your pussy and down your legs. My dirty little come hole. But that’s what Daddy’s little girl likes, isn’t it? Fuck…” Harry looked down at where he was being gripped by Y/n. Her tight little pussy working its magic on him.

Y/n’s telltale signs were beginning to show. Her thighs were shaking and her back was arching and she was grinding herself onto him each time he’d pull back. She was going to come.

Harry choked out a loud groan into the room, “Fuck! I’m gonna come!”

He reached down to rub her clit just as he began to pour into her pussy. He clenched his teeth and moaned into her ear. With the angle he needed to reach her clit his chest was pressed into her back, his stiff and sharp movements were forceful into her and she felt her own orgasm follow moments later. Thanks to his long fingers that knew just what to do and where to press to get her off.

Drool slid down her chin and to her clavicle as she came. The noise of the couch still creaking under her knees as Harry continued pushing into her increased in sound.

Harry hissed and moaned and kissed the back of her neck as he kept himself stuffed inside of her as she spasmed around him, squeezing his cock of all he had and letting it drain into her. A beautiful symphony of sex in the dressing room.

Harry laughed as he removed the gag and the panties from her face. She had small marks that dug into her skin from the fabric of the panties and the leather of the belt.

“God you’re gorgeous. Gonna go out there with me to meet the fans with my come slipping out of your cunt all night? Hmm?” Harry teased as she straightened her dress out and caught her breath.

And of course, that’s exactly what happened. She walked around and met some fans. Most didn’t know who she was. Some knew her as the girl that had been spending time with Harry. Others joked that she was following him around and that he didn’t want her there.

One pretty young thing, probably still in college, went from having her picture taken with Harry to making a snide remark to Y/n, “I love how you don’t care how you look when you dance.”

To which Y/n replied, “I’m just having fun out there like everyone else,” as she shook her hand (which she hadn’t yet washed after being fucked into oblivion) and felt Harry’s orgasm dripping down her thigh.

There was something so poetic about that moment. The secret that she and Harry shared. The reason why he was 20 minutes late to greeting his fans backstage. And Y/n was the bearer of said secret. Literally, since his come was still inside of her.

And that was just one of many times Harry fucked her in his dressing room. It became a regular thing. He’d gag her to keep her quiet but anyone who stood close enough to the door could hear him moaning and the sounds of skin smacking together and couches rocking. But no one ever said anything. It was Harry’s show after all.

There was one time when they went to an event. The lovely space was packed with people and the table they sat at was mostly Harry’s crew. Jeff and Tom were there and some others. All were people Y/n had gotten to know on some level.

And as per usual, Harry was horny. Y/n had gotten used to his extremely high libido and surprised herself even when she matched him in it. She hadn’t realized she was this way until Harry came along.

She was wearing a custom dress. Nothing like she’d ever had the chance to wear before. She’d worn lovely dresses and her wedding dress, she thought, would have been the nicest article of clothing she’d ever wear. But this dress… this dress was absolutely superior to anything she’d ever laid on her body. She loved it. It fit her so well and flattered her curves and made her feel pretty.

“Want to bend you over this table and spank you so hard right now. Tear this dress off you and make you ride my cock right here at the table,” Harry spoke into her ear as their plates of food were being placed in front of them.

Y/n just smiled and nodded as she listened to him tell her what he wanted to do. That was something she also had started to get used to. He’d do things like this in public and it startled her at first, but after some time she started to enjoy it.

When everyone began eating Harry lowered his hand to her thigh and pulled her dress up. No one could see what he was doing from under the table but Y/n felt it. The material of the dress was slowly lifted until he’d pushed the fabric up enough that he could smooth his palm up between her plush thighs and tickle her pussy with the tips of his fingers.

Y/n let out a gasped laugh and leaned forward before turning to look at Harry in surprise. He only smirked back at her and lifted his brows, “You okay, my dear?”

And Harry usually got his way. If he wanted something he could pretty much always get it. Just like how he wanted her to spread her legs wider so he could have access, she gave it to him. Just like how he wanted to slide two fingers into her cunt, she let him.

To everyone at the table, Harry was holding her thigh. Nothing more. He continued to chat and make jokes as he softly fucked his fingers into Y/n’s pussy.

And the thing about this was that he couldn’t apply much pressure, if any, to her clit, so he fingered her for nearly the entire duration of their dinner. His hand was wet between her legs as he continued slow, meaningful thrusts of his fingers into her.

She was on edge. So absolutely wrecked and worked up that Sarah interrupted the conversation at the table, “Y/n. Are you okay?”

Her chest was rising and falling fast. Harry paused his movements and looked over at his lover and realized, she was indeed a mess. Had barely touched her food when everyone else had just about finished and was panting and sweating. He smiled.

“Oh! Yeah. I… probably should,” she paused to hold back her gasp as Harry pushed his thumb over her clit, “go to the bathroom. Real quick! I’ll be right back!”

Harry was forced to remove his hand from between her thighs and she pushed her skirt down and quickly walked to the hallway where she knew the restrooms were.

Harry excused himself from the table with the excuse to check on her.

Y/n was already rubbing at her clit to make herself come in the stall when Harry barged into the bathroom, “Y/n. Come out, baby. Let me take care of you.”

Her eyes widened and she was quick to walk out of the stall. She needed him badly, “Please, your cock, Daddy,” she said as she lifted her dress and Harry pushed her to lean over the sink and pulled his cock out on her request. He was already hard. Fingering her and feeling her clench around him as she grew wetter and wetter each minute had done him in.

Her panties were ruined. He pushed the drenched material to the side and plunged into her softly as they both moaned, “Rub that pretty little clit for Daddy, baby. Get yourself off.”

It was probably the quickest fuck they’d ever had. Four minutes tops. Y/n was already on fire as her orgasm burst from her core and Harry held her cheeks apart so he could watch his cock, covered in her arousal, slip in and out, in and out until she was coming and shaking and gasping.

White gobs of her come stuck at his base as he continued fucking into her deep and he finally came, filling her to the brim with his come. He pulled out to watch himself drip from her pussy and then pushed himself back in to keep his sperm inside of her where it belonged, “Holy fuck, baby. Your pussy is incredible. Just taking my come like it’s nourishment. Fucking Jesus Christ.”

It felt so good to have Harry inside of her after nearly a half hour of slow, sensual torture with his fingers.

And as they both enjoyed, Y/n dripped of him when they went back to the table to join their friends. No one knew but Harry and Y/n and that was half the fun.

So, yeah, sex with Harry was incredible. Exciting. He never let her feel like she was lacking. He loved using tools on her. Tying her up, clamping her tits and her skin, toys, spanking, spreader bars, cuffs… She’d gotten a taste of what he liked and she loved it all.

And she was pretty sure she loved Harry too. He was the sweetest man. Very attentive and gentle, thoughtful, funny, and honest. But of course, when they were in bed he was dominant and loved to put her in her place but that only added to how much she really liked him. The duality of his nature was exciting to her. And she began to feel more comfortable with her body around him. He never once made her feel bad about her size. He clearly loved every bit of her chub.

So after their whirlwind European trip she was back in Illinois at home and trying to paint while Harry was in LA in the studio working on music and other business endeavors he’d started. They talked every night. She thought the distance would be good for her to focus on her work again but it was like she was blank. Her thoughts were only filled with Harry and what he was doing and the articles with her pictures and comments…

One evening, though, she did have a spark of inspiration. She began sketching out her canvas and mixing colors and finally, after nearly a two-month dry spell, put her brush against the canvas and began to paint. It felt good. She was suddenly struck with the need to create. Hours of building a piece with color and space and lines felt like things had felt before she met Harry.

Her fingers were green and her overalls were splattered and soiled from linseed oil and various hues she’d used on her work when her phone rang. Looking up at the clock she realized it was already 9 pm. Which was the time Harry normally called her every night before he went to the studio (it was 7 pm in LA).

She wiped her hands down her clothes and cursed as she rushed to grab the phone before the call went to voicemail.

It was a Facetime call because of course it was.

“Hello?” She rang out and adjusted the screen so she could see Harry and he could see her. She tried smoothing out her hair and wiping the smudges from her face but there was little she could do to repair her current appearance.

“Hi, baby. I miss you! How are you today?” Harry spoke, his face very close to the phone, and then as he stilled himself and the screen became clear she realized he wasn’t at home. A club perhaps. Maybe someone’s house. Definitely not the studio.

“I’m good. Was just painting a bit. Finally got a spark of creativity tonight. How are you? What are you up to right now?”

Harry sighed and grinned widely, she could tell he seemed a tiny bit tipsy, “I’m at a party and I’ve been telling everyone about you. Wish you were here so you could meet everyone. We’re just chilling, had a couple drinks, then I’m going into the studio in about an hour. Gonna be an all-nighter.”

Y/n nodded and smiled. She wasn’t surprised by any of this. He normally got into the studio late and stayed until 3 or 4 am. He was most creative at that time he told her once.

“Sounds fun. Wish I was there too.”

Just then a young woman nudged into Harry’s shoulder and came in to view on the screen, “Y/n!! It’s you! I’ve heard so much about you!”

She was clearly also tipsy. And just as she was about to respond to the mystery woman she watched as the girl threw her arm over Harry’s shoulder and licked her pink tongue up his neck before kissing it. And it wasn’t just a peck of a kiss. It was quite sensual in fact. As if she were trying to give him a hickey.

Harry laughed and pushed at the girl, prying her arm from him and the girl waved her hand at the video just before moving elsewhere.

“Sorry, Jess is clingy tonight,” Harry smiled and licked his lips.

“Oh is she? Has she been trying to give you a hickey all night then?” Y/n couldn’t help the bit of jealousy that coursed through her. She figured at that point she could trust him. He was a big flirt and she knew this about him. He gave off the wrong impression to people all the time. She’d seen women trying to shoot their shot and he would eventually have them back off but many of them never assumed he was in a relationship. She’d even overhead some women (when she was backstage after concerts) bragging about how they kissed Harry or how they thought they had a shot because he'd been staring at them, which turned out to not be true of course. But it didn’t make the sting feel better.

“No. No, of course not, baby. I wouldn’t let her do that. Only you’re allowed to mark me up.”

“But she’s allowed to lick you and kiss you?”

Harry paused and suddenly the screen was blurry as he appeared to moving through the space to somewhere different.

“Wait, hold on, Y/n.” The screen went dark but she could hear shuffling and some voices until the video showed his handsome face again but now he was outside.

“Please, baby. That was not… she’s been flirting with me a little but it’s all in fun. She’s just a friend. I would never do anything to ruin what you and I have. You know that. God, I wish you were closer so I could tell you in person and see you after the studio. Wake up to you, make love to you…” he trailed off as he spoke but kept his eyes on the screen, his face set in defeat.

“I know how you are, Harry. So I get it. But doing that right in front of me? Kind of tacky. Was she trying to make me jealous? If so, I’d say she’s not a friend.”

Harry groaned and leaned his back to a bench and nodded, “I’ll stay away from Jess. She’s just been finding me all night. I mean, I’ve known her for years so… but you’re right. Sorry.”

Y/n nodded and flattened her lips together. She really hated this. Hated feeling jealous when she figured it wasn’t necessary, hated not being with him, hated how famous he was and how everyone wanted him…

After his call with Y/n, he was careful to dodge Jess. And he hadn’t really been paying much mind to her to be quite honest. Yes, she’d been kind of all over him but he was used to that. Except now he needed to think about his girlfriend and what she might think and how it could be perceived in public. Not that any of the photos from this particular party would come out to the public – it was exclusive and contracts were signed promising privacy and respect of others.

Jess was a friend of Tommy’s and she was often invited to the parties like this and so Harry had gotten to know her over the years. She was always flirty but the question that Y/n brought up was valid. Was Jess trying to make Y/n jealous? It was inappropriate for her to kiss his neck like that when he thought about it with a clear head. Even if he wasn’t on the phone with his girlfriend, that was too intimate of a gesture to be innocent. He couldn’t allow things like that anymore. Not if he wanted to keep Y/n happy. And he didn’t want those kinds of intimate touches from anyone else these days. He missed his girlfriend.

His studio session was productive. He got a lot of writing done and set some vocals down for recording too. But he was still thinking about Y/n. Thinking about how they got off the phone and he’d apologized and she said she was fine but he knew she might not really be. They were too far apart and the distance was a problem. Harry was used to some distance in relationships. It was part of the package that he came with. But he hated it with Y/n more than ever.

He was in love with her. Deeply and madly. In fact many of the songs he started to write after meeting her had something to do with her in one way or another. He couldn’t get her off his mind. He’d dated around and had a couple of serious relationships in the past, but no one left a mark on his heart like Y/n had.

.           .           .

“I’m feeling like I need her with me all the time. But when I offered to fly her out and have her stay here with me in LA she said she thought the distance would be good. I’m going crazy, Pat. I don’t know if she is starting to think about breaking up with me or what. I don’t want her to leave me. But she’s been so aloof lately.”

Pat shifted her leg to cross over her opposite and listened. The man wouldn’t stop talking about Y/n. Every one of their sessions had been dominated by discussions about his new relationship. Harry was sensitive deep down. He had his shit together and he was many times nonchalant about dating and matters of the heart in public, but Pat knew the truth. He was sweet and his heart was delicate.

“Just let her sus everything, Harry. You can’t push her and you know that. She’s probably going through some growing pains with you. You’re uber-famous and everyone loves you and to her, it probably feels like she’s just your girlfriend who gets a lot of mean things printed about her. It’s very likely overwhelming. Maybe she’s trying to get her head on straight and figure out what’s best for her.”

“But what if she learns that she’s better off without me?”

Pat chuckled, “What if she does? Would you still want to force her to be with you?”

Harry sighed deeply and frowned, “I guess I wouldn’t want to make her do anything she didn’t like. But that’s the thing. I know she and I have something special. When we’re together it’s like everything just makes sense. I don’t want her to let all the awful things people make up about her be how she makes her decision. Because what she and I have is incredible.”

“But you’re seeing this from your point of view. Not hers. Give her space if she needs it. Keep open communication but let her decide what she can handle.”

He didn’t like the idea that Y/n would decide he wasn’t worth it. He’d finally found the one he thought was his soulmate. The one he loved and wanted to be with for the rest of time, but now she was stepping back. Putting more space between them than he liked.

And when he offered to come to her she declined that suggestion as well. Stating it would be better to be apart for a bit. Which indicated to Harry she was done or at least considering that idea. But he couldn’t understand it! How could she be done with him? He was so far from done with her. He’d never want to be “done” with her. He wanted to marry her, have babies with her, take her with him everywhere, curl into her body, and let his skin sink into hers for all eternity.

He partly blamed the night he talked to her when Jess made her unfortunate appearance and partly the fans. Harry loved his fans. He enjoyed interacting with them most of the time. He loved the attention and the enthusiasm they gave him. He loved creating for them. But they were the ultimate cock block if there ever was one. Every relationship he’d tried to maintain while being famous had, in the end, been affected deeply by his fans. Social media was brutal as it was, but when fans got ahold of the articles and posted pictures and got “involved” it only led to awful things. Many times social media stirred the pot but the fans kept the lies and the assumptions (conspiracy theories even) flying and going on for longer than it was necessary. But it’s not like he could just drop his fans. They were what his empire was built on. He wouldn’t be doing what he was doing without them. It was all a balancing act.

“I think I’m gonna go see her. Just to talk face-to-face. I can’t go on not knowing what’s really happening and doing it over the phone is not giving me the whole picture.”

“Harry… I think it would be wise to keep her wishes in mind. You are a convincing and charismatic man and so for you to go to her in person could interrupt her rational critique. You could just be doing more harm to the relationship this way. It would be a hindrance more than anything. You might just be prolonging the inevitable and don’t you think it’s better to let things take their course naturally? You don’t always have to make all the moves and sway the outcome. This isn’t a business. This is love and relationship stuff. It doesn’t follow the same rules.”

.           .           .

Y/n had been feeling pretty good. Her mind was clear and her inspiration was at an all-time high. It had been a month since she’d seen Harry in person but they still spoke almost every night. She still loved him. She missed him, but the time apart felt necessary. Felt like she could grasp reality again.

But one thing was certain with the distance. It was that she couldn’t take not seeing him and touching him. She was thriving, but she was beginning to miss him more than she thought she would. Instead of getting easier, it got harder. Her nights would be spent thinking of him, what it would be like living with him, kissing him, marriage, babies… But she wasn’t sure if he was feeling like they were headed in that direction. Because if he didn’t feel like any of that was in their future then the relationship should be stopped. It couldn’t continue to jog along on the same path that it had been. They needed to progress and she needed to know he was committed to her and that he felt the same way. But as it was, their relationship was very good, it just wasn’t the kind of relationship that felt like it could move beyond what it was. She needed to tell him and be honest about what she wanted. Marriage, babies, 100% commitment… But what would happen once she told him all of this? Would he run for the hills? It could very well be the end of them.

.           .           .

She had insisted that he not come to the gallery where her work was displayed. It was in New York City and he begged to come. He told her he would take some time off before the next leg of his tour began. Told her that he had a beautiful spot he always stayed at and she could be with him and he’d take her out to his favorite restaurant in the city… but she said no. And Pat told him to listen to her.

Which was hard for him. Harry didn’t like being told no, and normally, no didn’t matter much (of course depending on the situation). Normally, he’d just go anyway and surprise her and dote on her, and in his mind, she’d be so happy and they’d have amazing sex and things would go back to how they were before she pushed for distance. But that’s not how it went.

Instead, she had a weekend in New York City without him. They spoke every night and she told him everything and he pleaded with her some more to let him come to her but she still said no.

On Sunday when they got off the phone Harry was beside himself. She had been too busy to really talk. She was getting on a flight to go back home so he understood why but that didn’t mean he was okay. He cried. He felt his heart drop and felt her slip away. She didn’t want to see him, she didn’t want his support, and she wouldn’t go to see him either… so what was left?

He’d been good and paying attention to, heeding Pat’s advice. He knew she was right. He knew he couldn’t force her hand in this. But God did it hurt. If only she’d let him visit her she’d see how good they were together. Nothing else mattered.

But he needed to know what she wanted. Because it didn’t feel like she wanted the same thing. They needed to talk, face-to-face, and he needed her to be direct. To rip off the band-aid once and for all. Then he could begin to heal and try to get over her.

When she called him the following day it was unexpected because it was much earlier than they usually had their calls and it was just a call, not a Facetime chat.

“Hi. How are you?”

Harry had had a lump in his throat for the last few days with his thoughts about her. About how she was going to end it. About how she didn’t really want to put in the effort to be with him. That he wasn’t worth it. That his fame and his fans were too much.

“I’m good. You’re calling a bit early. What’s going on?”

“I just had some really good news! A curator bought ten of my paintings and will be hosting an exhibit at David Kordansky and I’ve been invited to go as a guest of honor of sorts, amongst the other artists! It’s going to be all these big names. Oh my god, I’m so excited!”

Harry smiled widely, “Baby, I’m so proud of you. When is the exhibit?”

“It’s next weekend! And you know David Kordansky, right?”

“Uh… no. Sorry. Should I?”

Y/n giggled into the phone, “Oh… it’s just one of the biggest and most popular galleries in Los Angeles.”

Harry’s eyes went wide, “Here? You’re coming here?”

“Yes! God, I’m so excited! You’re the first person I’ve told and I just got the news right before calling you. So, I’m still processing it all. But yeah! And a bonus is that maybe you can come! If you want. If you can!”

“Absolutely. I’ll tell everyone I’m booked next weekend. Spending it with my girl.”

She sighed into the receiver with a big grin on her face, “I can’t wait to see you, Harry.”

.           .           .

Y/n was properly nervous. She had been trying to keep her distance from Harry but it had sort of backfired. She wanted to feel out the situation without his influencing nature and his hot body, and those pink lips pecking at her, his deep voice luring her to see it his way. The longer she was away the more she realized that she could barely breathe without him. She was so far gone for the guy that the distance only made her ache. Yes, she got a bit of her creative spark back, but she felt like that was more of an internal issue than it was to do with Harry.

But her nerves weren’t because she was going to see him after over a month. The nerves were because she needed to confront him with her real feelings and find out if he was on the same page. She had to know once and for all what he wanted. And if any of her ideas of where the relationship should head weren’t on Harry’s radar, well, it had to be over. They couldn’t continue like they were. It was perpetual limbo. Purgatory. She loved him and if she were younger with more time to spare she’d enjoy traveling with Harry and just having fun without expectation of where their final destination would land them. But as it was, she wanted to start having babies in the next few years. And if Harry didn’t then she’d need to start over and begin dating around. And that takes time. So she needed to get a move on. Find someone that wanted the same things she did. If that wasn’t Harry.

She had planned for the worst. All the scenarios in her mind led to them breaking up. She couldn’t imagine that Harry would be willing to settle down with her. He had the whole world at his fingertips. And she was just a girl from the Midwest. She really didn’t imagine that they had much more left to pick at. The pages stopped turning. The well had run dry. It was fun while it lasted.

Harry had his driver take him to the airport to pick her up. She told Harry she could just take a taxi but he didn’t want to miss a single moment with her. Wanted to see her the second she arrived in LA. And he was there. Waiting for her just as he said he would.

He scooped her into his arms and felt tears prick at his eyes, “Oh my god. Y/n… I missed you so much.”

She felt her heart swell and lurch with his arms around her and his lips on her forehead. Right in front of everyone in the airport. Photos were snapped and Harry didn’t care. He looked down at her and she noticed his eyes were glossy, “Harry…” she thumbed at his cheek, “Are you okay?”

Harry sniffed and the tip of his nose was red as he nodded, “I am now.”

She’d been to his house before they went away to Europe. They spent two days having sex and just staying in enjoying one another. Those two days were her favorite memories with Harry. Not that she hadn’t absolutely enjoyed everything else they’d done together and where they spent their time but there was something really special about being in his lovely home doing nothing with him and eating some of the best food she’d ever had (a combination of Harry’s cooking, delivery from some of the best restaurants in LA, and leftovers from a fancy catered party that Harry skipped but had requested two large bags full of yummies dropped off for them).

And the moment Harry had her in his house this time around, they were tearing clothes off and making love on his big bed. Harry didn’t bother with the clamps or ties or the belt this time. He just wanted her. Wanted to show her himself and how much he loved her. In fact, he planned on telling her he loved her soon. He needed her to know how he felt.

And the irony of it all was that Y/n was thinking the same thing. She wanted to tell him how she felt. He needed to know the truth and she needed to know where he stood. But they were both hesitating and it didn’t come out quite the way they intended.

“I think we should talk a little, Harry. I’ve had something on my mind for a bit. It’s… kind of important.”

They were both still naked lying on his bed when she blurted it out. Harry felt his stomach drop. He’d been constantly on edge that she was going to break up with him and he didn’t know if his heart could handle it.

So instead of talking he sat up quickly and got off the bed, “Yeah. Yeah. Let’s talk. Um, I need to take a shower first… and then uh… we can talk. Yeah.”

Harry cried in the shower. Preparing himself for the worst. Trying to get his emotions out and let his body soak in the warm water and calming scent of his shampoo. He was a mess. And he assumed it was over.

And to Y/n, him hopping out of bed like that and running off when she said they should talk, that move was his answer. He didn’t want to talk. He didn’t want to hear her truth. He had no intention of being committed or serious with her. He only wanted sex and fun. And that was great, but she was closing in on 30 and it was time to settle down and find love. And it was clear to her now, that Harry didn’t want that. Or at least not in the way she did.

She paced in his bedroom for a bit after dressing herself but when he was still showering, twenty minutes later she went downstairs and paced in his living room. She saw a bouquet of flowers near the front door at the table with a card in it and she automatically plucked the card out to read. It hadn’t occurred to her that she would be reading anything that could upset her. But she was caught off guard by the message.

“Let’s get dinner tonight, H. I miss you endlessly. Love – O”

She flipped the card over and there was nothing on the back except the name of the florist. No date anywhere. She didn’t know when these were delivered or if he’d had dinner with his ex. Her heart sank and her stomach felt heavy.

She slowly made her way back up the stairs and realized the shower was off. Harry was done. She found him standing on his balcony looking out over his garden. He hadn’t even bothered to find her. To see what she wanted to talk about that she said was important. He clearly didn’t care.

He took a 35-minute shower and then went out to chill on his balcony.

She considered just leaving without a word. Just calling an Uber and leaving for good. Getting a hotel room and forgetting about it all.

But now she was pissed.

She opened the balcony door and Harry was startled when he heard her approaching.

She laughed as she shook her head, “Forget I was even here huh?”

Harry scrunched his brows and shook his head but before he could respond she continued, “That’s okay. I get it. You and I aren’t on the same page. You’re having fun and you’re free and getting invited out to dinner with your ex, and-“

“Wait! What? I don’t-“

Y/n put her hand up, “You heard me. It’s okay. We never made any sort of promises or real commitments. Never said we’d wind up married or together in the end. You’re at your best and you deserve fame and fun and freedom. I’m only holding you back.”

Harry put his hands on her shoulders and shook his head, “No. Y/n… this was what I was worried about that you were-”

“That I want a real relationship? I’m almost 30. I can’t be playing around and traveling the world when I don’t know what you even want. And you just made it clear how disinterested in my concerns you really are-“

“Y/n. Please. What are you-“

“Stop. All you do is tell me what I should think and what I should do. You’re too… you pressure me to see things your way and you never listen. So now you listen to me.” She swallowed to gain her composure and looked up at him squarely so he understood how serious she was, “I can see now clearly, you have no interest in making a family with me. In being with me. You’re just having some fun. And that’s okay. But our fun has come to an end. I can’t go on like this anymore. I need to find someone who wants what I want. Someone who isn’t stuck on their ex and someone who will tell the whole world about me and not pretend that I’m just someone you hang out with.”

Harry shifted on his feet. He hadn’t expected this. In all the scenarios he ran in his mind she was breaking up with him and she didn’t want to be with him and he wasn’t worth it. But she was saying she wanted commitment. He smiled and opened his mouth but Y/n scoffed.

“See? You’re not even taking this seriously! Here I am telling you I’m breaking up with you and you’re smiling! You couldn’t give a shit!”

Harry’s smile fell from his face, “No I was… You’re breaking up with me? Y/n please-“

She pushed him off of her and backed away, “Go and enjoy dinner with Olivia or whoever. I’m out of here.”

Harry ran after her, “No! You can’t leave me! Please that’s not what happened. I didn’t even see her. And if you’d just listen-“

Y/n stomped her foot and turned to face the tall man. She pointed her finger at this chest, “I’m done listening. We’re done. You broke my heart.”

Harry shook his head and followed behind Y/n the whole way to the front door, pleading with her to stop so they could talk but she continued to cut him off.

“Stop! You don’t get to push me into making a decision anymore. It’s over.”

She gathered up her bags and shakily pulled her phone out to bring up her Uber app to call for a car. She was thankful all of her bags were still near the front door.

She rushed out of the house and Harry felt like he was going mad. She wouldn’t let him talk and explain and tell her that he wanted what she wanted. Every time his mouth opened she yelled for him to stop. Screamed even. Had he been so insufferable that this was how she reacted to him?

So he watched with tears in his eyes and his heart in his hands as she loaded her things into the Uber and left him standing at his gate.

He didn’t know what he would do. What could he do? He needed to let her cool off and then he’d go to her and have a conversation. He’d make her see that they’d been on the same page all along.

He called Mitch to get advice.

Mitch asked him why he hadn’t called Pat instead but Harry insisted his best friend would give him the best and most brutal advice, while also supporting him and wishing him luck. Which is actually what happened.

“Go and surprise her at the gallery. Do something ridiculously dramatic and then declare your love for her to everyone in the room. Something like that. I don’t know man. I think you two will work it out. You’re so good together. I think she just needed some time, ya know.”

Harry sighed, “Pat’s going to hate that. But I’ve got to do it, though, right? Do something absolutely nuts to get her to listen to me.”

.           .           .

Y/n had the worst, absolutely the most horrible, awful evening. She bawled her eyes out and barely slept. Harry hadn’t even tried reaching out to her. Not that she really wanted that. She half expected it. But it only solidified everything to her. She imagined he probably slept like a baby.

The following day was the exhibit. She was not prepared. Not mentally anyway. Her tears had barely dried by the time she was entering the gallery. She put on a happy face and forced herself to talk and smile. But she only felt the dread of what had happened the day before.

The curator greeted her, bringing a glass of champagne for her to sip, “I’m amazed by your work. I think your collection fits in so nicely here. But you know I’m holding on to all your pieces until one day someone offers me a million each for them,” he laughed and Y/n smiled. She doubted that would ever happen.

The evening should have been amazing. She was meant to have Harry with her and it was supposed to be a big night for her. Something that could potentially change the trajectory of her career. But Y/n wasn’t happy. Her exciting moment was clouded by thoughts of Harry and how she loved him but now it was over.

Through the doorway opposite the entrance was a small bar area. Guests could go get their drinks and then head back into the gallery. But there were a few bar tables and some stools. Y/n had been eyeing it all night. A moment to get away and sit by herself for a while.

The room was darker and quieter, even though it was open to the main gallery. The small high-top tables had four tall, cushioned stools around each. The only person in the bar was the bartender.

“Hi. Can I have a glass of chardonnay?” Y/n leaned into the bar and her eyes settled over the array of colorful bottles lined up behind the young lady who stood at the bar.

The young woman smiled, “Sure. Anything in particular? Would you like to see what I’ve got?”

“Not really. This is going to sound so bad, but just the cheapest one.”

Y/n dug into her small clutch to pull out her phone card and then waited as the young lady poured a glass of Y/n’s cheap glass of wine.

“Your art is excellent. I’m a big fan.” The woman looked over her shoulder as she plumbed the top of the bottle with the cork and placed it back into the small fridge below the counter.

“You know my work?” It was not expected. She didn’t think the bartender would know the artists by their faces alone.

“Yes! Of course. I usually get to know who the artists are that have their pieces here. Yours is outstanding.”

She felt her face get warm from the odd feeling she always got when someone loved her work and recognized her. She still hadn’t gotten used to that feeling yet but she enjoyed it nonetheless.

When she took the glass she thanked the lady for the wine, “And, thank you for the kind words too. That means a lot to me.”

She took a deep breath and sipped her wine in the empty space as she attempted to let her bad mood dissolve. She knew it was impossible to let it go completely. Her wound was so fresh. She’d just gotten her heart broken and that would take some time to grapple with. But she knew she could be okay because she’d dealt with and come through the worst kind of tragic loss anyone can imagine. Losing Robert devastated her. For a very long time. She’d only gotten to a place where she felt she was ready to find love again. And her short time with Harry was nothing in comparison to what she’d suffered. So yeah, she’d been through far worse. She’d be okay.

The music that played in the small space was slow and the tune sounded a lot like an old Foo Fighters song. But it was all instrumental and she couldn’t be sure. She pulled out her cell phone and decided to text her sister. Catch up a bit. Feel something sweet and nostalgic to get her mind off of her sorrows.

She smiled when her sister texted back with a picture of the kids.

She looked up and paused to listen closely to the music playing again. Yeah. It was an instrumental version - definitely Foo Fighters. Everlong. That was the song! She snapped her fingers and smiled again as he looked back at the picture of her nieces.

“Excuse me, Mrs. Y/n. This is for you.” The bartender laid an envelope down on the table. It had her name written on it.

This felt very reminiscent of-

She looked around the room and out into the gallery, where people fitted in lovely outfits and amazing hairstyles milled about, in search of the one person that might have had something to do with this.

She looked back down at the envelope and toward the young lady who had already gone back behind the bar, “Who gave this to you?” She was hesitant to open it.

“Ms. Adams. The gallery’s director. She said it was from a very special guest.”

A very special guest.

She wasted no more time in ripping the top of the envelope open knowing already who it was from.

She braced herself for what she might read on the folded paper inside. Her heart walloped in her chest and she felt her throat go dry as she carefully pulled the paper out and unfolded it.

I’m sorry for the way things happened yesterday. I wanted to tell you so much more. I need you in my life, Y/n. Take a drink in the director’s office with me? Please? - H

She swallowed thickly and placed the paper down on the lacquered wood. The words stared up at her. Very reminiscent of that night. Their first night together.

She decided to take a moment. Finish her glass of wine and find her resolve. She’d see him. Because of course, she would. She’d fallen for the guy and perhaps closure would be good. For both of them. She tried not to get her hopes up.

But even with the idea that she wouldn’t get her hopes up, from the very base of her spine, small bursts of hope began spreading over her back, warming her up and causing the edge of her lip to flick upward the tiniest bit.

She had to stop. She couldn’t allow the butterflies and the warmth to cover her chest. This wasn’t an olive branch. This wasn’t hope. But that was what her body was feeling, the way it reacted after reading his words.

Stop.

She read the note again and the right side of her mouth quirked but she stifled the smile that tried breaking out over her features.

“Uh, hi!” She scooted off her stool and waved at the bartender, “Do you know where the director’s office is by chance?” The young woman smiled, “Follow me, Ms. Y/n.”

Y/n followed behind the young woman to a doorway at the far end of the room and into a hallway. Framed prints were hung along the wall and the floor was dark wood while the walls were a light cream. A few doors were passed, the bathrooms, a numbered room, until finally, they reached the director’s office.

The woman knocked before turning the knob to open the door and stood back, “Here you are.” She gestured at the open door.

“Thank you.” Y/n wavered in her movements wondering if this was the right thing. Should she entertain this idea? Of course, she was going to entertain this idea, but part of her wanted to keep her tough exterior and remain firm in her decision.

Slowly pushing the door further open, she stepped into the threshold and was met with a quaint office-sized room. The same dark wood floors sprawled below her feet, but the very first thing her eyes landed on was that of Harry holding a bouquet of flowers and wearing a soft smile.  

She closed the door behind her and stepped in a couple of feet. He was in a well-fitted navy suit and he looked tired. But he was handsome.

The thought quickly hit her. How did he get in here? Who let him use the director’s office? But then, as he ran his ringed fingers through his hair and she saw remnants of chipped nail polish she was reminded of who he was. Not just her lover or her ex. But he was Harry. Everyone knew him or knew of him. Of course, he was allowed in the director’s office.

“Hi, Y/n,” Harry spoke reticently as he held out the bouquet to her.

He wasn’t sure she’d come to him or that she’d want to even talk to him. And he thought about making a grand gesture. Take over the audio system and declare his love publicly before everyone as he walked out into the crowd toward her. Make a scene. Make her listen. Have everyone rooting for them. Rooting for him.

But that wasn’t right. That would have been too pushy. Not fair. This night was about her. If he’d gone about it the way he wanted it would have had all eyes on him.

He knew, though, that he needed to be here with her. To tell her how he really felt and what he wanted and then if she still wanted that with him, still wanted to be with him, they could end the night the way it was meant to be ended. Together.

“Hi, Harry,” Y/n spoke softly, keeping her eyes on his eyes as she took the lovely bouquet full of pink peonies and soft cream roses.

Harry gestured toward the brown Midcentury style couch, “Will you sit with me? I won’t take up much of your time if you don’t want. I just wanted to say some things.”

The couch was large enough for just two people. Harry was glad she had to sit so close to him. He wanted to eat her up she looked so pretty and so sweet. And just the fact that she’d come to him to entertain a conversation had him soaring.

Placing the bouquet down on the glass coffee table, Y/n noticed the bottle of wine and two glasses as he pointed, “Would you like a glass?”

Nodding her head, Harry pulled the cork out and poured her a bit of the red wine. She felt like she should say no just for the fact that she’d only just finished a glass of white wine and surely it would make the red wine taste odd. But ultimately she figured she could use another glass of wine.

“Yesterday I was working up the courage to tell you how I want to be with you for good,” Harry said as he leaned his back into the cushion behind him with his own glass of wine, “Wanted to tell you how serious I am about you. But I thought you were planning on breaking up with me so I needed a minute to figure out how I was going to convince you to stay.”

Y/n’s eyes bounced over his features as she cinched her brows inward. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Had he wanted the same thing she did the whole time?

“And I’m so sorry that it seemed to you like I was putting off a serious conversation with you. That’s my fault. I should have stayed there with you in bed and listened to you right off. Even if it meant potentially having you break up with me,” he licked his lips and sighed, “Instead, I did what I normally do and tried and figure out a way to make something work in my favor. So I paused that moment hoping you’d change your mind, or that I could come up with something. Prolonging it for the sake of just holding on to you a little longer.

“It’s because I’m selfish and I like to control the narrative. But that’s never been fair to you. So, I understand if my apology is no good anymore. I just felt like maybe I can tell you what was really happening in my head yesterday. Because that part, you did have wrong.”

Y/n blinked her eyes and nodded, “Well, then… I guess I’m sorry too. Because it sounds like I might have jumped to conclusions. I just didn’t think you’d want something serious. Long term. But there’s more to it than just that you know?”

Harry frowned and shook his head, “What do you mean?”

Y/n could see how timid Harry had been since the moment she walked into the room with him. She felt the need to help assuage him so she turned her body toward his and pulled his hands into hers before speaking, “I mean that I’m getting older and I think it’s time for me to really settle down. For good. I mean…” she breathed out a nervous laugh, “like, babies, marriage… death. All that. That’s what I mean.”

Harry nodded and raised his brows, “Yeah?”

Y/n grinned as Harry’s thumbs ran along the sides of her hands. The corner of his mouth pulled upward. She could see his swagger return in almost an instant. His eye contact was solid and his dimples carved into his cheeks.

“Well, yeah,” she started to feel flustered by his proximity, the way she could see his pupils roaming over her face and watching her mouth, “I’m not saying we need to get married but like,” she swallowed, “I’d like for us to be serious enough to know that we’d be headed that direction if things are good. And I know you’re super famous and that’s why yesterday I just…”

“I want to be with you. I want it all with you.” Harry bowed his head, finally breaking eye contact and his hands tightened around hers, “I thought you were done with me. I thought you were going to break up with me and that I wasn’t going to be worth all the trouble for you. Because I know this is a lot.”

“No. I just thought you wouldn’t want what I wanted and the way you reacted to me telling you I wanted to talk and how you didn’t come to find me after you were done showering… I felt like you were trying to figure out the best way to break it to me- either that or you were trying to avoid me. I just… Thought the worst.”

She couldn’t have described the way her insides were pulsing and expanding and churning. She’d spent the better half of the day reeling over losing him. Over knowing she might not get to look into his eyes in this way again. Might not see the small freckles on his face again and the way he blushed despite being so sure of himself. But here she was sitting with Harry and in under three minutes everything had changed. If she had just listened yesterday. If he had just listened.

“But so did I. That’s why we’re in this mess. I thought you were breaking up with me and so my behavior made you think the worst.”

Y/n smiled and allowed herself to indulge in his eyes and in the grin he was holding back and the way his fingers felt on hers… Was she just dreaming? Was she just about to wake up and realize it had all been a dream?

“Is it okay if I… ?” He pulled at her gently and slowly wrapped his arms around her and she smelled his familiar cologne. She loved how this felt. Hugging him. Feeling his solid body against hers. She eased into his hold and wrapped her own arms around him.

Harry whispered into her ear, “I should have told you everything yesterday. Let you talk and then we wouldn’t have gotten in this mess. It’s me and you, Y/n. Okay? Me and you. That’s what I want.”

Tears of relief and elated joy broke from her waterline and Harry pulled her in tighter, kissing her temple, “I thought you were done with me. I thought you wanted to break up with me,” the anguish in his voice was not missed. He’d been hurting too.

Harry brushed his palm up and down on her back slowly and pressed his lips to the top of her head, “God I was so worried this was it for us. Fuck. I’m not letting you leave me again like you did. I can’t be away from you like that, Y/n.”

Pulling her head back to look up at him she did see the glisten in his eyes from the start of tears. She knew hers matched. It all felt like a dream. But just in case it was real she needed to speak the words. Sliding her hands upward and cupping his face she was nearly trembling from relief and excitement, “I love you, Harry.”

Harry closed his eyes and pressed his forehead into hers, clutching her lovely dress tightly, “God, I love you, Y/n.”

.           .           .

Stepping into the gallery with all the other people in the room and having Harry by her side felt surreal. Everyone was watching them. She was okay to share this night with him. There was no way around it that people wouldn’t be interested in her because of her boyfriend. She figured that would be something she’d just have to get used to.

Harry squeezed her hand tight and she looked up at him. He looked proud. So important with a big, pleased smile on his lips as he looked down at her.

“You realize you’re coming back home with me after this. Right? And I’m never letting you leave me again.”

Harry had grown a lot as an individual. He still had moments where he could be pushy and use his charm to get the things he wanted, but he figured some things just couldn’t be totally trained out of him. He allowed Y/n to make her own choices. He gave her space when she needed but she came back to him in the end. He wanted her to be his and everything they’d done that had gotten them to where they were currently had worked out. So Harry had no regrets about coming to her on this night.

“Of course, I’m coming home with you. I’d be offended if you assumed otherwise,” she smirked happily. “And I wouldn’t dream of leaving you again.”

Harry couldn’t wait to get her home and make love to her. Seal it all together in finality. He knew that tonight was just the beginning for them.

And as if they could both read one another’s minds they smiled and paused together in time. Everything had finally come together for them. At last.

A/N: This is the last part of this series! Would love your feedback!

Feedback/Thoughts | Support Me! | Main Masterlist

Tags: @daphnesutton @indierockgirrl @stylesfever @harrys-jumper @ameerakane20 @harryssky1 @tobesolovelysstuff @jerseygirlinca @harrys-flower @onlyangellucifer @cherryluvhobi @michellekstyles @golden-hoax @a-strange-familiar @yousunshineyoutempter @tenaciousperfectionunknown @swiftmendeshoran @luvonstyles @tiaamberxx @lukesaprince @dirtytissuebox @closureesny @lhharrylilpumpkin @justlemmeadoreyou @harrysmimi @harrys-foxy @itsgigikay @angelbabyyy99 @lllukulele @lanadelharry @novasblogofstuff @gills-lounge @damnasstyles @malwtilda @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @0oolookitsme @babybunharry @anothermannharry @love-letters-to-uranus @itjustkindahappenedreally @kelly-fushiguro345

[daisyblog]

Proud Sister

Our Story Masterlist Summary: YN is by Louis side at his London Premiere for All of Those Voices.

Based on this request

Sitting in the back of the black Range Rover with Louis, felt all too familiar to YN. She had done it a few months ago at the Venice Film Festival when they supported Harry for the Don’t Worry Darling premiere. She can remember walking the red carpet when One Direction’s This Is Us was released in 2013. 

YN was stunned when Louis had asked her to walk by his side on the carpet, for his own documentary, All Of Those Voices. Of course she was going to be there, supporting her big brother. But she was expecting to walk with Harry and her siblings. 

She was in Sydney with Harry, when a FaceTime from Louis popped up on her phone. 

“Hey Lou!”.

“Tiny! You alright my love?”. Louis’ cheery voice boomed through the speaker.

“Yeah..I’m alright…whot’s got you smiling like that?”. YN couldn’t help but notice how chirpy Louis was considering it was early morning back in London.

“Cheeky fucker…I’m always ‘appy.”. Louis pretended to be offended. “Anyway..I want to ask you something-“.

YN was quick to interrupt. “Yes I want a One Direction reunion.”.

“Yeah I know, but you’ll have to wait.” YN pouted at Louis words. “But how do you feel about walking with me on the red carpet?”.

YN eyes were wide, in shock at what Louis had just asked. It must have been a joke because out of everyone why would Louis just want YN to be by his side. 

“Is this a joke?”. She couldn’t help the words flowing out of her mouth.

Louis chucked, his blue eyes crinkled as he did. “Course fookin’ not…m’serious.”.

“Why me?”.

“Why you…are you being fookin’ serious right now”. Louis couldn’t believe how oblivious YN was on how much she had supported him over the years. “Tiny…you made me a big brother…you were my first friend…you were there at my audition believing in me…you cheered me and the band on through the show…you were by my side through three tours…you were the one who listened when Zayn left and the band decided to go on a break…you were the one by Mums side when I couldn’t be…you were the one who held it all together for us all when Mum passed…you were the one who made me believe in myself when it came to making my own music…you were the one trying to help me support Felicite…you are always the one by my side, so yeah I want you where you always are…walking by my side.”.

Louis and YN had always had a special bond, and Louis had always been loving towards his siblings but hearing Louis list all the things that YN did naturally because that’s the kind of person she was, had hit her hard emotionally. 

“You’ve made me cry now Lou.” YN was trying to gently wipe away her stray tears as she was getting ready to watch Harry’s show. “I’m a fookin’ mess…look at me.”.

“Yeah…well…I was only saying the truth.”. Anyone who knew Louis, would know that unless he meant it then he wouldn’t say it.

“Yeah of course I’ll be by your side.” YN eventually answered as she dabbed under her eyes with a tissue. “You’re my best friend too Lou…you know that right?”.

“Oi…don’t fookin’ start me off…right m’going before I cry…love you Tiny.”.

“Love you Lou.”.

As the car approached Leicester Square, screams could be heard from fans waiting for Louis’ arrival. Louis got out of the car first, before holding his hand out to help YN step out. 

As the siblings walked further up the red carpet, security following their every move, fans and the press were quick to snap photos and videos of the Tomlinsons. 

Louis stopped to take photos with fans at the side of the barrier, whilst trying to have small conversations with them. YN admired the interactions from her position slightly behind him. Louis and his fans had a special connection that only they could understand, and it was precious to watch the love between them. 

Louis was signalled to pose for photos by himself, before he called YN over to have their photos take together. Louis wrapped his arm around his sister, YN doing the same as they wore bright smiles on their faces. 

As Louis made a joke about his cheeks hurting from smiling so much, loud screams were heard from further down the red carpet.

“Your boyfriends arrived.” Louis playfully nudged YN’s shoulder with his.

“How do you know that?”. YN looked at her brother, confused how screams meant Harry had arrived.

“Believe me love…I just know.” Louis playfully squeezed her cheek with his finger, like her used to do when she was younger. 

Proving Louis right, YN could see Harry further down walking with her grandparents and siblings, trying not to draw attention to himself as in his words “today is Louis day”. YN had always known she was blessed but seeing her family all together made her realise it more. 

Louis had been called over by an interviewer to answer a few questions, meaning YN could sneak off to see her family. After giving each of her grandparents and siblings a quick cuddle and a peck on the cheek, she found herself next to Harry who immediately placed his arm around her hip and leaving a peck on her cheek. 

The Tomlinson siblings posed for photos together, before they were escorted into the screening. YN and Harry found their seats and sat comfortably next to each other. YN was in the middle of telling Harry something that had happened previous in the evening, when a voice interrupted them.

“Is this seat taken?”. Liam’s voice was heard. YN and Harry would recognise his accent anywhere. 

Harry stood from his seat and took Liam into his arms. “Nice to see you man.”.

“You too Styles!”. Liam let go of Harry, before leaning in to give YN and hug and a friendly kiss on the cheek. “How are you love?”. 

“I’m good…you kept this a secret.”. YN called Liam out on his surprise appearance at the premiere. 

After a quick catch up, Liam went to his own seat where he was sat further back with his new girlfriend. 

Before finding his seat next to YN, Louis said a few words and thank everyone involved in the making of his documentary, thank his fans because without them he wouldn’t be standing where he is now, thanked his four brothers who were a huge part in his journey.

“And a massive thank you to my family…who constantly support me through my personal life…as well as my career.”.

As part of the documentary, Louis grandparents and siblings were all asked to be a part of it and to answer some questions about Louis. 

The audience had a little giggle at the part when Daisy and Phoebe had explained that they saw Louis as a controlling big brother, but really he was always right. 

But what had the audience awwing was when a clip of YN came on. She was sat in her and Harry’s living room, family photos hanging on the wall behind her, but one that stood out was one of YN stood between Harry and Louis from their tour in 2014. The three wore big smiles on their faces as Harry and Louis both hugged YN close. 

“Louis always says how lucky he is…but everyone who has Louis in their life are the lucky ones…he’s just too humble to realise it”.

At YN’s words, Louis reached over and squeezed YN’s hand, a little gesture to show how much that meant to him. There were many emotions shown through the screening. Happy times, sad times and bittersweet times. Louis aim was to show all the sides to his story, and he succeeded! 

As the credits played on the screen and everyone stood to give a round of applause for a touching documentary, YN brought her brother into a big hug and whispered “Mum would be so proud of you.”.

To the world he was Louis Tomlinson, to YN he was Louis, her big brother. 

Tag List: (let me know if you would like to be added) @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @harrys-flower @platinumbarbie143 @frickin-bats @harrysbbyh0ney @chronicallybubbly @goldensunflowe-r  @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @kaverichauhan @peterholland04 @panicattheuc @or-was-it-just-a-dream @hittiesontour @bunnyharold @fanfictioncafe @lilfreakjez @jerseygirlinca @iamahallucinationnn @theekyliepage @indierockgirrl @buckybarnessimpp @ashleighsss

[0nlythrowharrybeaux]

#4 with lots of angst but a happy ending!😭

Warning: Mentions of car accident, pregnancy complications, 4pre-term birth, hospitals.

Harry had been a bit hesitant to schedule any shows for when you made it to your 6 month of pregnancy. However, you assured him that you wouldn't even start your maternity leave until the 7 month mark because you wanted more time after the baby was born; you didn't want to feel rushed to say goodbye to her. You had a desk job, so you weren't doing anything strenuous and your job also wasn't all that stressful. So during a break in his tour he came home and after a few checks ups where Harry asked a bajillion questions, your doctor assured him that everything was perfectly normal and looking really great.

It's not that Harry didn't want to tour, he actually really did because after your baby came he intended to take at least a year or two to just be there with you both. But he also didn't want to be away from you just in case you needed him during this time. But you reminded him that your mom would be coming in from LA to help out soon and well, his mom was constantly around, doting on you, and other friends of yours and Harry's in town, so you had many people around who would surely lend a hand if you ever needed it. So with that information, plus your doctor's confirmation he gave Jeffrey the green light to add one more month of shows to his tour. After all, it would be the last one for a bit.

He was having a blast, he was making the most of these last few shows because he knew he'd miss it a lot down the line. And right now he was in the huddle with the band, pep talking them all right before they got on stage. They were just about to do their chant when he heard someone call his name loudly.

"Harry!" he turned around to see Brad running over with his phone to his ear looking absolutely panicked and scared and worried all mixed into one. He'd never seen him looking that scared and it made him start to worry. As soon as he was closer to the huddle he lowered his voice, "H, Y/N's been in a serious car accident. It's not good." He said and his stomach immediately sank. Everyone's cheerful and excited expressions shifted into those of concern and sadness, "Your mum just called Jeff, she just got to the hospital, they won't give her any details." he said as he said whatever Jeffrey was telling him on the line.

Harry was frozen though, he wasn't sure what to do. He just knew he needed to get there as soon as possible. People always overthink and ponder about bizarre or worst case scenarios to maybe know how to handle them when they arise, but this is not something that Harry would have ever even considered. He was in shock, he had no control, he had no idea what was going on. He couldn't even cry. His ears were just ringing as he heard the crowd cheering and roaring maniacally as the screens darkened, indicating he was about to go on.

"The show." he finally said flatly as he swallowed the lump in his throat, "I can't do the show."

"Yeah, Tommy's already taking care of that." Brad assured him, "Let's just get your things, we're trying to get you there as soon as possible. Jeff is on the other line with Kris. I guess Kim is in town for work, she flew on her jet." he said and Harry nodded, "C'mon". Brad said and guided Harry back to his dressing room. The band rushed after them and followed Harry to his dressing room. He needed to get changed out of his crazy costume... he was trying to get his shoes off, but his shaking hands were making the simple task almost impossible.

"H, I've got it." Mitch said to him softly as he stooped down and Harry nodded. Once his shoes were off he hurried to get changed into his casual clothes. The rest of the band started gathering his things, getting them into his duffle bag so that he could head out as soon he was done changing. They all frowned when they heard him start to vomit in the bathroom but it was understandable, there are just somethings in life that cause a visceral reaction.

Harry just couldn't believe that this was rally happening. He felt like he was outside of his body in a way, just disconnected. But all that came crashing when he realized that no one had any idea of your condition. No one knew if your baby girl was alright...or maybe they wouldn't tell his mom anything because neither of you had made it...the thought of that just made him feel sick to his stomach. He dropped to his knees and just started to hurl up everything in his stomach. He was coughing through his tears and he exhaled shakily as he wiped off his mouth. He then flushed the toilet and rinsed out his mouth before he finished changing.

"Here, H." Sarah said handing over his toothbrush when he opened the door.

"Thank you." he mumbled as he took it and quickly brushed his teeth.

"Yes! We got the jet!" Brad said to everyone as soon as Kim confirmed to Jeffrey that her flight crew was heading to the airfield as they spoke. Everyone sighed in relief at this news, "She told Jeff that they can get you there in 2 hours." he told Harry and he nodded. He wished he could teleport, but 2 hours was better than nearly three hours of flight, not counting the entire process he'd have to go through at the airport. He'd make it there after midnight if that were the case, so the fact that she was in town and was just letting him take her jet was a heaven ordained miracle, and he hoped it wouldn't be the last of the night. Not even ten minutes later they were off to the airfield.

True to her word, Kim's crew was ready to go as soon as his car pulled up. He and Brad hurried out and they had taken off not even five minutes later.

********

Back at the hospital Anne was in a complete panic because no one was telling her anything. No one was giving her any information or just brushing her off. She knew that you were on your way to get your mother from the airport, so she sent Michal and Gemma to go get her and bring her over.

She was more than relieved when Jeffrey called her to let her know that Harry had been able to borrow a jet and was in the air now. But as she hung up with Jeffrey she started getting a lot of text messages from friends and family asking if Y/N was alright. One person sent her a video that someone had taken of the paramedics wheeling her into the ambulance. She immediately called Jeffrey back and he got to work on making sure that those videos got taken down. But obviously, the internet spreads information like a wildfire and half an hour later there were even news reports on the television. People started to recognize her and come ask her questions and so eventually the hospital staff just let her stay in a private room while she waited for your mum, Gem, and Michal to arrive.

********

Obviously, Harry saw the videos. He didn't think he'd be riddled with messages about this; people were asking him questions that he didn't even have the answers to. The not knowing was the worst part. There was already news that he had cancelled his show and speculation that the rest of the tour was cancelled, which he hadn't even spoken to anyone about but that was true. Even if it was a good outcome, he didn't want to be apart from you after this.

He was afraid though because in the videos he saw your pants had blood on them and you didn't appear to be fully conscious as you were wheeled away. The accident had been bad; your car had been t-boned on the driver's side, so you surely had taken the impact, which he knew couldn't be good. He didn't want to think anymore, he just wanted to get there and do whatever he could to help.

********

Once your mother got there the hospital staff were far more collaborative as they shared information on your condition. And thankfully Harry had arrived shortly after everyone else. He asked to speak to the doctors straight away before anything else, he needed to know what was going on before he faced anyone else.

"Good evening, Mr. Styles-"

"Just tell me what happened please." he cut the woman off and she nodded.

"For now your wife is stable, we're just closing her up from the c-section. In terms of your daughter, she's in the NICU. Unfortunately we're not too sure if she'll make it on her own yet." she explained to him and Harry just felt his heart tighten up in his chest as his throat bobbed. "The impact caused very serious abdominal trauma to your wife. First responders determined that the placenta was moderately detached from the uterus because of the bleeding she had." she explained, "When we opened her up though it was completely detached." she said and he shook his head.

"OK, but what does that mean for my baby?" he asked, slightly aggravated. He didn't understand why these people just never said what they meant. He understood it could be hard to give people bad news, but beating around the bush was far more harmful in his opinion.

"When the placenta detaches it means the baby has no oxygen or nutrients. And in severe cases like this it's standard to perform an emergency c-section as quickly as possible to ensure that damage to the baby is minimal." she explained to him and his tears started to fall, "Unfortunately, we don't know long it was fully detached for...if it happened upon impact or on the way to the hospital. But this can lead to several complications for the baby, but given that your wife is just shy of 31 weeks the baby still has some growing to do and my biggest concern is brain injury, which can cause a lot of developmental delays. We just won't know until later down the line." she explained and he nodded, "We've got her on some oxygen for now since her lungs are not fully developed yet. But in normal, pre-term birth circumstances babies born between 31 to 34 week have a 95% survival rate, which is very good." she said and he sighed.

"But this is not a normal, pre-term circumstance." he said to her.

"No, but we're doing everything we can. Your baby seems to have developed really well from what I was able to see. These next couple of hours are critical though and if she makes it through the night I’ll be very optimistic about her recovery.”

"Can I see them?" he asked.

"I can certainly arrange for that. You might be able to see the baby first, but she's in the incubator and it'll be a bit frightening to see her hooked up to several things, but that's just what we need to do to keep her stable." she informed and he nodded, "Your wife had to have a blood transfusion, so she's out. And I believe they are also treating to her fractures. She may also be out for a few more hours since she also suffered a concussion."

"Jesus..." he sighed shakily.

"Your wife will pull through though. She's in great health, Mr. Styles." she assured him and he nodded.

"Alright, thank you Dr. Mehta." he said and she nodded, "I'll escort you to the room your relatives have been given and someone will come get you shortly to see your baby." she said.

It was about 15 minutes before a nurse came in to take Harry over to the NICU. He had to get into a full body paper suit, hairnet, mask, and gloves before he could get in. Once that was squared away he was led to the little incubating carriage that had your little girl in it. When Harry saw her he was shocked at just how tiny she was, he swore she'd fit in in his hand, she couldn't be bigger than his forearm. He was happy to see her, but like the doctor had said it was also scary to see her so tiny and defenseless hooked up to all those things. It was hard to know that she was fighting for her life.

“Can I touch her?” He asked the nurse.

“Of course. You just put your arm through the hole there.” She explained and he nodded, “Just mind the tubes and monitoring pads.” She said and he nodded, “I’ll give you a few minutes, I’ll be right out there if you need anything.”

“Thank you.” Harry hummed and then he was left alone. As soon as she was gone he started to cry. You two hadn’t even agreed on her name yet; but he was glad you hadn't because it might be more painful to name her and lose her. It pained him so much to think that she might not make it through the night and that maybe you'd never even get to see her. He hesitated before his gloved hand made contact with her through the hand opening, but he shook off his concern and just touched the top of her tiny hand. He saw the faintest little twitch in her fingers and he chuckled happily at her response as his tears fell even harder, "Hi princess!" he smiled through his tears, "It's me, your dad." he sniffled, "Please, just...just hang on for me, princess. We already love you so much, we can't say goodbye." he cried quietly. He prayed silently to the heavens that his little girl would make it. She had to make it.

********

It was about two hours later that he was told he could go see you. You were still unconscious but at least he got to see that you were alive. Your right shoulder, arm, hip, and leg were in a cast. He was glad that at least your mom was with him so that they could hold each other while they cried. She wanted to stay a while longer so Harry gave her some privacy as he stepped outside of the room. Letting out a sigh of relief that you were alive. A little torn up, but still with him.

It was undoubtedly a sleepless night. He couldn't risk missing anything. It was around 8:30am the next morning when Dr. Mehta came by the waiting room. He hurriedly woke everyone else up as she stepped into the room.

"Good morning, Mr. Styles and family." Dr. Mehta smiled. If she was saying that it meant that it was good news, right?

"Any updates?" he asked and she nodded.

"Your baby is stable. She remained stable all night." she shared happily and every let out a sigh of relief. He felt a weight lifted off of his shoulders, "now this doesn't mean she's out of the NICU, her stay will be a bit longer, I'm afraid, but she is out of immediate danger." she informed him and he nodded, "Your wife should be waking up in the next couple of hours."

"Thank you, thank you so much." he sighed and she nodded.

"I did want to show you something though."

"Of course." he stood and followed after her.

"I was reviewing your wife's chart and I noticed something interesting." she said and he nodded. Harry followed her down the hall and she let him into an empty room with an x-ray projector. She set the file in her hand down and pulled out your x-rays and powered on the projector before she placed them on the screen. "Look at the fractures. They're here on the shoulder, elbow, hip and femur." she said and Harry nodded, "That's why your baby's alive." she said and he turned to her.

"I don't understand." he said.

"I think your wife had enough time to react before she was hit. It looks like she tried to turn her body away was much as possible, which explains the way her shoulder fractured and she probably used her arm and leg to try to shield her stomach so that they took the brunt of the impact."

"That's...so incredible. Thank you for showing this to me." he nodded with tearful eyes and she nodded.

"Of course. My shift is over, but I'll be back again tonight. Your nurses from last night are still on shift."

"Thank you." he said before he headed back to the waiting room and shared with his family what the doctor had told him. He was so proud of you and he couldn't wait to tell you.

When you woke up a few hours later he immediately went over to see you. It all tears for the first few minutes before you asked about your baby. He squeezed your hand gently and sniffled.

"She's alright. I get to see her again later." he explained and you nodded in relief, "She's just a tiny little thing, this big, I swear." he smiled through his tears as he demonstrated her length to you with his hands, "Your doctor said you saved her life. S'why you're all broken, baby." he said and you smiled at him as you cleared your throat to speak.

"I just wanted to protect her as much as I could." you sniffled and he nodded.

"You did, my love. She's here because of you." he sobbed and kissed your forehead and you felt a weight lifted off of your shoulders, "I told you adding more shows was a bad idea..." he said and you chuckled before you winced, "Oh, I'm sorry, not making you laugh's gonna be hard."

"It might be if you were actually funny, baby." you croaked out and he pouted playfully as you smiled at him. "What're we gonna name our baby? We haven't even discussed it properly."

"S'cause we knew it'll get us in a tiff. But considering you're handicapped and all, I supposed your opinion bears more weight." he said and you chuckled again and he grinned, "And you said I'm not that funny..." he hummed as he ran his thumb over your knuckles.

"I'm concussed." you reminded and he chuckled and shook his head.

"Well, I told her that she was so loved...and well, she's our little love. So I think I want to call her Love." he said and you smiled.

"Love Styles sounds like a cheap lingerie brand." you wheezed as you tried to adjusted yourself a bit and he burst our laughing before reaching up and fluffing your pillow up a bit.

"Yeah...that's...definitely not what I'm going for." he smiled and you smiled back.

"We don't have to decide yet." you said and he nodded.

"I'm just so happy that you're still here with me." he said softly and you sniffled and nodded.

"Me too."

********

It had been a few days and Harry just needed to get home and get showered and changed. It felt good to be home and when he walked past the nursery he smiled, he couldn't wait to have you and your baby home. When Harry got into your shared bedroom he haphazardly dumped his bag out on the bed in search of his toothbrush before heading in for a shower. He took his time under the hot and soothing water. After he stepped out and dried off a bit he just dropped onto your bed and before he knew he passed out. He had maybe slept six hours in the the last 2 days.

"Harry." he heard faintly, "Hang on, he's passed out." he heard as he gained consciousness and slowly blinked his eyes open to see Brad hovering over him and he immediately sat up.

"Is everything OK?"

"Yeah, mate. Y/N wanted to ask you something." he said and he grabbed Brad's phone.

"I've been calling you." you said and he sighed.

"Sorry baby, phone's dead. What is it?" he asked groggily.

"Let's name her Violet." You said and Harry smiled.

"I like that a lot." he said with a grin.

"Yeah?" You asked.

"Yeah, it's perfect." he agreed.

"OK. That's all. Get some rest."

"I'll be back soon though, OK? I love you." he said and you nodded.

"I love you." you hummed back and he blew a kiss at the screen before you hung up.

"Love Styles? Really?" Brad asked him and he scoffed.

"Oh, shut up..." Harry huffed before draping his arm over his eyes.

READ MORE PICTURE PROMPT BLUBRS HERE!

[cinemastyles-blog]

Categorized by each of Harry’s Eras

LHH | Frat Boy Harry | Prince Harry | Bandana Harry | Dunkirk Harry | HS1 Harry | Fine Line Harry | Man Bun Harry | Mustache/Quarantine Harry | Harry’s House/ Current Harry | Narry | Zarry

All of these are SMUT one shots unless they say fluff beside them.

The list will be updated as one shots are written.

Niall Horan Smut One Shots -> @wastedonhoran

Louis Tomlinson Smut One Shots -> @holdinonto-heartache

LONG HAIR HARRY

Temporary Fix  

Lights, Camera, Action.

Lights, Camera, Action. Part 2

Lights, Camera, Action. Part 3

Tattooed Harry

Your Brother Will Kill Me

Not A Free Show

You Like That?

Becky’s So Hot

Was It Worth the Wait?

Exploration

FRAT BOY HARRY

Frat House

B.M.W.B  

Game On.

Model For Me

Cherry Pop

What Happens on the Tour Bus, Stays on the Tour Bus.   What Happens on the Tour Bus, Stays on the Tour Bus Part 2

Can I Take You Somewhere?

Isn’t Your Mom Home?

I Love Being in the Band.

And Scene.

PRINCE HARRY

Visiting Home

Visiting Home Part 2

A Friend of Harry’s [Zarry]

Riding the High

Best Tutor Ever

BANDANA HARRY

You Got Me

Make Up

Matter of Time apart 2

DUNKIRK HARRY

Under My Skin

Spill or Fill

Spill or Fill Part 2

Spill or Fill Part 3

One & Done?

Medicine

Assistant C.E.O

Tensions Are High

Teacher’s Lounge

Glad You Passed By

HS1 HARRY

Live in Studio

Live in Studio Part 2

Golden

Red Cuffs

Show Me How You Do It

Kiwi. Part 1 and Part 2

It Pays To Be A Harry Girl

Just A Girl in the Bar

FINE LINE HARRY

Still the One

Still the One Part 2

Loved You First  

Staying Focused

Staying Focused Part 2

To Be So Lonely

MANBUN HARRY

When You Know, You Know.

A-hole to Everyone but You

MUSTACHE/QUARANTINE HARRY

Late Night Talking

Three Plus One fluff blurb

Next Room Over

So, You’re Mr..  

So, You’re Mr.. Part 2

HARRY’S HOUSE/ CURRENT HARRY

Punished

Showered with Love fluff blurb

Iced Vanilla Latte  

We Should[n’t] Be Alone Together 

We Should[n’t] Be Alone Together Part 2

You Think Of Me When Exactly?

Say That Again, Baby

Just Like the Movies?

Just a Guitarist?

BOXER HARRY

Come On, You Got It.

NARRY

When In Rome [Narry]

To Niall, From Harry  

Now, Imagine That With Two

Guess who [Harry, Niall, Zayn]

Touch Each Other

FANFICTION

Two Ghosts [hs]

PRIVATE AFFAIR [h.s]

Prologue

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

I take requests and my anon is on.

I am open to writing anything your filthy little hearts desire, all you have to do is send them here!

[avatar-anna]

can we get a cute little something between yn and simone maybe current. maybe they do a little girls day and harry isn’t jealous but finds it hard to handle because yn has a special relationship with her since she spent so much time with simone. but harry would be the sweetest and be supportive and when they get back ask all about it.

you can totally change that i just rambled with what I thought apparently lol

summary: three times young mom!reader and simone went on their mommy-daughter dates

word count: 3k

mostly y/n and not harry which y'all might not like, but i thought it was cute

Young dad!Harry x Young mom!Reader universe

The first time Y/n took Simone out on a Mommy-daughter date, she was seven months pregnant. She was alone in Holmes Chapel, a town she was relatively new to, with nothing to do. Harry was across the globe on tour because his management wouldn’t let him come home until the last possible moment, his mother was at work, and she was in her boyfriend’s childhood home, balancing a bowl of chocolate covered almonds on her baby bump and flipping through British reality television, which was decidedly not as good as the American programs.

“What should we do today, little melon?” she asked, rubbing her belly. Laughing to herself, she added, “Not so little anymore.”

Not that there was anything to do. Holmes Chapel was fairly sleepy, with a small strip of stores on the main road and farmland. Lots and lots of farmland. It was nothing like Y/n was used to growing up, and while Anne was nice, she didn’t know the woman all that well and didn’t really know how to talk to her. It felt like there was a big elephant in the room every time they sat down to eat.

But Y/n was so bored. She was used to going out with friends, talking to people, feeling the sun on her skin. Holmes Chapel was not home, but it was too late to go back now, though the house she grew up in currently wasn’t all that inviting either.

She eventually decided on getting her nails done. Y/n had seen one salon when she went with Anne to the grocery store, and it was the first thing she thought of now. Struggling to an upright position, she put on some comfortable clothes, slid into her shoes, and set off. 

Y/n ignored the stares as she passed people on the street. She got a lot of stares now that she couldn’t hide her bump anymore. Friends of Anne asked who Y/n was with wide eyes the first time they’d gone out together, and Anne calmly explained that Y/n was a cousin’s friend who needed a place to stay. Not the truth, but they weren’t allowed to tell the truth. And since Y/n had a young face, people stared, showed their visible disdain or disapproval of her being pregnant at such a young age. She was sick of the looks, which was why she mostly kept to the confines of Anne’s home, but she was feeling particularly restless today and decided to just deal with everyone’s judgment.

Anne never judged her, though. Not once, which Y/n appreciated.

The nail salon was small with a tinny bell attached to the door, announcing her arrival to the establishment. The woman manning the front desk widened her eyes at the sight of Y/n’s belly, but thankfully recovered quickly. “Can I help you?”

“A manicure and a pedicure, please?” she asked, hating how heads turned at the sound of her accent. Another thing that made her stick out around here.

“Of course, right this way,” the woman said, pointing to one of the cushiony chairs with a tub attached. 

Y/n knew she didn’t really have much money to be spending on something like getting her nails done, but she just felt so gross some days. Her ankles were swelling, she had acne, got hot flashes, got nauseous around certain smells. This was a small thing to make her feel just a little more normal again.

She heaved herself into the chair, resting her head with her eyes closed once she got her feet up. The walk had made her tired, made her feet hurt, but it was worth it.

“Miss?”

Y/n opened her eyes to find a different woman standing next to her. “Hi, sorry. Just a little tired.”

“Did you walk here?” she asked Y/n, eyes widening for a completely different reason than talking to a teen mom.

“Yeah, I—I don’t have a car,” Y/n said lamely. Not that she’d be able to drive in a completely different country anyway. “But it’s fine, I—Oh shoot. I forgot to pick out a color.”

She began to get out of her seat when the woman rested a hand on her shoulder. “No need. What color were you thinking?”

“Light yellow? Pastel?” she said, the color of one of the onesies she bought online the other day coming to mind. It felt silly to think about matching with her baby that hadn’t even been born yet, but it was out before Y/n could take it back.

“I know just the thing. Toes too?”

Y/n nodded before resting her head again. She picked up her phone. To play a game or scroll through Instagram, she wasn’t sure. Y/n didn’t like going on social media all that much these days. It was a reminder of her life back home, of all her friends moving on and doing normal eighteen year old things. She didn’t regret her decision in having the baby or moving, but some days were better than others. 

She decided on a message to Harry instead. He probably wouldn’t see it for a few hours, but she knew he would appreciate waking up to or coming off the stage to an update.

Y/n: on my first official mommy daughter date!

Before she hit send, she quickly erased the message and closed her phone.

I’m a mom, she thought. Y/n was seven months pregnant, and she would be having a baby soon, but she’d never called herself a mom before, didn’t believe it until right this second. But she was a mom. A good, bad, or average one time would only tell, but it scared her none the less.

“How far along are you?”

Y/n looked to her right at the woman who was sitting in the chair beside hers. Middle aged, clear skin, kind brown eyes. She didn’t look at Y/n the way other people did. There was no judgment, no preconceived notions about what kind of girl Y/n was, just plain curiosity.

Clearing her throat, Y/n said, “Twenty-nine weeks.”

“Almost to the end, then,” the woman said. “Have you thought of a name yet?”

“I think so. Have to run it by the dad first,” she said, resting her hands on her bump instinctively. “But I call her Simone.”

“That’s beautiful,” the woman said. “Can I offer a tip?”

“Uh, sure.”

“Lavender and chamomile,” she said. “Essential oils that help with relaxation and peaceful sleep.”

Y/n knew she probably looked exhausted, which was why the woman offered that particular piece of advice, but Y/n took it happily anyway. “That really helps?”

The woman smiled, and it wasn’t in a condescending way. “It does. The smells are supposed to relax you.”

Before Y/n could say anything else, her nail tech returned with two bottles of nail polish in slightly different shades of pastel yellow in her hand. “How do these look?”

For the next hour, Y/n didn’t worry about a thing. She let the nail tech take care of her, who encouraged Y/n to close her eyes and relax. And she did. For a whole hour, the baby didn’t kick, her back didn’t hurt, and she felt her shoulders slowly lose tension. She almost didn’t want it to be over. When it was, though, Y/n felt ten times better. She felt normal, a feeling that was hard to come by these days.

“Thank you,” Y/n said to her nail tech, handing cash over. “I…I really needed this.”

“Come back when your daughter is old enough,” the woman said. “You can get matching nails together.”

And when little Simone was old enough, Y/n did take her to the small nail salon. Her feet dangled in the cushiony chair, and she giggled when someone tried to touch her feet. She and Y/n got matching sparkly purple nails because that was what Simone wanted, and Y/n couldn’t help but comply. And everyone was just as nice and doting as the first time Y/n came in, and every time after that.

That was a favorite outing for Y/n and Simone when they did their mommy-daughter dates. They wouldn’t always go to the salon in Holmes Chapel, of course, but they got their nails done together frequently, from the first time with the sparkly nails and to Simone’s first dance and so on.

“Are you sure Daddy can’t come?”

“It’s for me and Mommy only! No Daddy allowed!”

Harry clutched his chest as if Simone had wounded him. He leaned back on the couch and slid down a little, making a real show of it. He peeked an eye open to see Simone’s reaction. Her hair, which was tied up in two little pigtails with bows on each one, swung back and forth as she shook her head, clearly exasperated by her father’s antics.

“We can play later, Daddy,” she said, skipping over to Harry. She jumped onto his stomach and squished his cheeks between her hands. “Stop being sad.”

“I can’t. Your mother is hogging you. She’s hogging my baby,” he joked. Kind of.

Harry knew all about Y/n and Simone’s mommy-daughter dates. Y/n often went out with Simone when they joined him on tour. She liked to get Simone out of the hotel rooms, find something fun for the two of them to do together. Harry was all for it, of course. He didn’t like that Y/n sometimes felt trapped when she traveled with him, and this was an opportunity to see the world in a way that some people didn’t get to. He sometimes felt left out, but he imagined that was how Y/n felt a lot of the time.

“You’d hate it. We’re going to the American Girl Doll store.”

Harry raised his eyes to see Y/n standing at the foot of the couch dressed for the day in a flowy sundress that covered her baby bump. Baby number two, Harry thought excitedly. He didn’t think that would be in their cards, but all it took was a few months of him being on hiatus and bam! Y/n was pregnant.

Putting an affronted hand on his chest, Harry said, “I love American Girl Dolls.”

Y/n bent down and kissed his forehead. “Then we can go again tomorrow. I’m sure our little melon won’t mind, will she?”

Simone nodded excitedly. “You can come with us tomorrow, Daddy!”

Tapping Simone on the nose with his knuckle, Harry said, “Promise?”

Simone nodded, showing off her biggest smile, which was now missing a tooth. “Promise.”

Y/n reached down and stretched her arms out to take Simone, and she happily leapt up into her arms. Behind his daughter’s back, Harry stuck his tongue out at Y/n, and once Simone was settled with her, Y/n stuck her tongue out back at him.

Simone was asleep when she and Y/n came back. “A long day of shopping,” Y/n said, passing the sleeping five year old over to him. Harry spent the afternoon reading and watching TV and doing a little bit of writing while they were gone, but he just wanted to be with his girls, all three of them. He knew Y/n and Simone’s days together were special, and he knew that he could just as easily have his own special day with his daughter, but sometimes he felt like there was an invisible wall with Y/n and Simone on one side and him on the other. He was doing all he could to get past or move around it, but they were so close having spent so much time together, just the two of them.

“You know,” Y/n said, settling onto the bed next to him. “All my little melon could talk about was showing you the doll she bought today.”

“Yeah?”

“Mmhm. She wanted to wait until tomorrow to pick out all of the clothes and accessories because you have the best clothes.”

Harry grinned, running a hand over one of Simone’s pigtails. “Really?”

Y/n leaned over and kissed her husband’s cheek. “She loves you. Just as much as she loves me.”

“I know,” he said, a blush pinking his cheeks. “I know she does, but—”

“Simone idolizes you, baby,” Y/n said. “You, sir, are her hero. She asked me the other day if she could bring you to Career Day. And before that, she said she wanted to be you for Halloween.”

“I’d be the coolest dad at Career Day,” Harry said, even though he knew he wouldn’t be able to do it.

“You would, and you’re the coolest dad here too. At home. So no more moping. No more pouting about mommy-daughter time, you hear me?”

“I hear you. No more pouting. Kiss?”

Y/n hummed, somewhat suspiciously. “Sometimes I think you pout just so I’ll kiss you.”

“I would never,” Harry said with a gasp, but he was grinning just the same as he leaned in. “Is it working?”

Narrowing her eyes, she said, “You’re lucky you’re cute. Come here.”

“So, who’s the boy?”

“Wha—What are you talking about? There’s no—How did you know?”

Y/n grinned and winked at Simone from her seat in the salon chair. “I’m your mother, Simone. I know everything.”

Simone huffed and sat back in her chair. “I thought that was just a line parents used to scare their kids.”

“Sometimes it is, most times it isn’t,” Y/n said. “So…?”

Y/n knew Simone would’ve fiddled with her hands if she could, but the nail tech was currently working on painting one of them a pale yellow. “He…hardly notices me.”

“What makes you say that?”

“We sit next to each other in history class and sometimes we work on discussion questions together, but other than that it’s like—it’s like we live on two different planets. How do I get him to notice me?”

“How should I know? I don’t have much experience when it comes to guys,” Y/n said, joking with her daughter just a little. 

Seeing right through it, Simone narrowed her eyes at Y/n and said, “You’ve been with Dad since you were seventeen. You know something.”

“Maybe you’re right,” Y/n said. “I’m not gonna tell you how I charmed your father because you’ll go, ‘Ew you’re my parents! Don’t talk about Dad like that!’ So I won’t. What I can tell you is be yourself and if there is a common interest between the two of you that doesn’t have to do with history homework, and start there. Shared interests is always a great place to start.”

“It’s that simple?”

“It’s that simple.”

“Oh.”

Simone and Y/n were quiet for few minutes while the women in the small nail salon they’d been going to for years worked on their hands. Y/n didn’t live in Anne’s house in Holmes Chapel, and she was far from pregnant, but she still liked to come back and get her nails done with Simone whenever they came back to visit Harry’s family. Simone got harder and harder to pin down as she got older, but Y/n was always surprised when her oldest daughter cancelled her plans when she offered they go somewhere, just the two of them. Y/n loved all of her children dearly and had a special connection with each of them. But these moments, this one on one time with Simone was something she held close to her heart.

“Dad’s gonna freak when he finds out, isn’t he?”

“Yeah. Not sure I can stop that, sorry.”

She sighed and rolled her eyes. “Can’t you just not tell him?”

“He’s my husband, little melon. I tell him everything.”

“Well can you hold off until there’s actually something to say?”

Y/n took the free moment to lean over to Simone’s chair and kissed her forehead. “Course.”

After they finished getting their nails done, they took the familiar walk back to Anne’s house. Y/n looped her arm through Simone’s, enjoying the familiar press of her daughter against her side. “You know, when I was about your age—”

“You walked all the way from Nana’s house with me in your belly so you could get your nail’s done. I remember,” Simone said. Y/n told the story every time they went to the salon together.

“Are you going to let me finish?”

“Go ahead.”

So Y/n continued her story all the way until they reached the house. “And when I told your dad about it, he was so jealous. He was all, ‘I can get my nails done too, you know!’ But I said, ‘No. Get you’re own thing. This is ours,’” she said.

“Dad and I don’t have a thing,” Simone said.

“Sure you do. He’ll help you pick out your prom dress, pay for college, and walk you down the aisle. That’s three things right there.”

“Now I get to tell Dad something that’ll make him annoyed with you.”

Y/n playfully pinched Simone’s arm. “You listen here, my little melon, Harry Styles is a lot of things, and at the top of that list is an absolute pushover when it comes to his children. He would make traveling to the moon your ‘thing’ if you asked him.”

“I know. We go to the movies every two weeks. He and Julian go for drives to the grocery store when we’re all on our periods, and…I think he recently took up surfing with Maeve.”

Y/n knew all of this, of course. Harry was always looking to spend time with his kids, and now that they were all getting older and more independent, it was harder to get alone time with them. Except for Natalia and Geneva, who were still young and thought he was the coolest person on the planet. Y/n and Simone had their little dates, and now Y/n got to impart wisdom to her daughter from time to time, but for as long as Simone could speak she and Harry had their thing: she and Harry were terrible gossips.

“Hm. So, what do you think? Lunch before going home? Thrift store?” Y/n asked.

“Let’s just go back. I’m sure the house has descended into chaos without us,” Simone said, picking up her pace.

Y/n grinned and followed her daughter down the familiar sidewalk, each step bringing back memories of all the times she’d walked down it; from having a baby in her belly to holding her in her arms to walking side by side with her daughter who was now taller than her.