#how i can engage with fandom in a way that makes it easier to stay normal about my own stuff

[blondiest]

girl help i lost sight of creating things first and foremost for myself and got overly invested in external validation therefore setting myself up to feel terrible about my works because i started looking at them too closely and became paranoid that they weren't good enough and that people would think they're stupid and—

i am going to be on here less and for a little while may be engaging with other people's writing a bit less as i try to get back into my own creative flow again 🥲 will still pop in now and again but i think being too tuned-in to everything has been making me a little insecure (<- a me problem; all of you are lovely and sweet) and with some added work stress i'm just!!! not engaging with things in a way that makes me happy or that feels particularly healthy.

honestly i feel strange even bothering to make a post about this bc Who Cares but i didn't want anyone to feel ignored if i am just straight not replying to messages etc for chunks of time. 🤝

[puppyeared]

this could just be "gatekeeping but im being really polite abt it" but. its less abt thinking only certain ppl should be allowed in, and more like i dont wanna open a pandoras box that makes it difficult for everyone to have fun. shrugs

i wanna post my skip to loafer art but i cant do it knowing ppl are gonna put it on tiktok and pinterest bc itd be like. bringing an invasive species ykwim

[starboyshoyo]

Wedding Bells

Characters: Riddle, Deuce, Epel, Silver x fem!reader (seperately)

Fandom: Twisted Wonderland

Genre: fluff, romance

Proposals and weddings with your beloved!

Riddle Rosehearts

Married life with Riddle comes in stages. It’s extremely difficult at times, especially in the beginning, and easier in others. You’d better be ready to take your vows seriously, because Riddle certainly will- even before you’re actually married. Especially the ‘for better or for worse’ part. He’ll outright refuse to hold a wedding until he can be financially and emotionally independent from his mother, refusing to subject you to her tyranny.

One way or another, Riddle will gain his freedom, either from gradually taking back control or from being disowned. Without the shadow of his mother hovering over him, he’ll decide to follow a path of higher education to law school. It’ll be a tough time period for you as a couple. Riddle is always busy studying and working hard, hoping to earn his degree early. He’ll attempt to help with house chores when you move in together, but he never learned practical home skills when he was younger. The combination of teaching him how to manage a household in addition to his school workload means that for a time, you will be doing most of the home duties.

The wedding discussion also has to be put on hold for a while. Your fiance is a perfectionist and refuses to hold anything but the perfect ceremony for you, with the most beautiful ring he can get his hands on. After graduating law school and landing a job, he’ll save up for the ring of your dreams.

He’ll propose after a romantic evening at home, under a full moon at midnight. Not everything went the way he thought it would- the ring was the wrong size (“What do you mean, fingers have sizes? I thought only shoes had that.”) and he burned the food at one point, but the two of you spent year waiting for this moment. Just seeing your eyes light up in disbelief and happiness when he finally gets down on one knee makes everything worth it.

Riddle will ask you to take the Rosehearts last name. He likes the idea of being joined, in life and in legal matters. Having his last name makes him feel like he’s truly your provider and protector. Plus, he’s just a hopeless romantic and wants to hear you being called Mrs. Rosehearts. He won’t complain if you don’t want to, though. Tradition is important to Riddle, but he respects your wishes much more.

The ceremony is small- held at an indoor venue in a courthouse, with just a few attendees. The Heartslabyul graduates will help set everything up, and catering is taken care of, courtesy of the Clover family. Riddle couldn’t be happier when he sees you walk down the aisle, escorted by Ace and Deuce. Deuce will give him a nod before stepping back, while Ace’s gaze will linger on Riddle’s a bit. The message is clear: take care of her, or else.

Deuce Spade

The moment Deuce realized he was in love with you was the moment he knew he wanted to marry you. You are Deuce’s first and only love, and the only person he’ll ever need. The two of you are engaged just after graduation- he proposed on the spot without being prepared. He just saw you running towards him in your cap, diploma in hand and gown fluttering in the wind behind you, and blurted out, Will you marry me?

This was not how he planned the proposal at all, and he apologizes profusely when he realized he didn’t even get down on one knee or give you a ring. In the last week or so of school, he’ll practically be living in NRC’s metal workshop, learning to bend and hammer out a ring for you. And with Crewel’s help and a bit of luck, he’ll even create a small gemstone himself, to add to the ring.

He’ll definitely marry you soon after the ring is done. Like Riddle, you and Deuce have a small, private ceremony. Crowley was generous enough to let you hold it on NRC’s campus, with Ramshackle as the venue. The run-down, homely dorm you stayed in during your high school days was also the place you spent the most time with your best friend, so it’s only fitting you’d marry him there too!

While Riddle, Cater, and Trey agree to be Deuce’s groomsmen, Ace actually requests to be a bridesman instead! He says it’s because “this is the last time he’ll ever get you to choose his side over Loosey Deucey.” He’ll definitely send pictures of your day out to Deuce, rubbing it in his face that Ace got to have a self-care day with you while Deuce didn’t. Deuce can’t be too mad, though. After all, it’s him you’re marrying, not Ace :)

Deuce would actually discuss name changes with you before the wedding. He actually likes the idea of taking your name. He would feel very close to you by being connected to you by name. But he also likes the idea of you being a Spade because it’s like he’s bringing you into the family!

You’ll most likely move in with your husband and his mother for a year before moving to a small house nearby. Ms. Spade absolutely loves you, and dotes on you when Deuce is out working for the day. She’ll try to help you with your own work as well, especially if you’re working remotely or working from home a lot.

When Deuce is home, he’ll spend as much time with you as possible. There’s a lot of sleepy cuddling and long naps in your shared room. Even if he’s busy, he’ll help you and his mother with chores. Grocery runs are his favorites, because it gives him time to go out on a pseudo-date with you.

When on the couch together, Deuce loves placing your hands side by side, looking at the rings on both of your hands and thinking about how lucky he is. He can’t believe that you’re with him now, forever.

Once you finally get your own place, Ace will try to ask for a key. Deuce will give him one, and then change the locks just to mess with him.

Epel Felmier

Epel didn’t even think about marrying you until the two of you moved back to Harveston. The townsfolk don’t have much news to talk about, so a lot of the gossip will be diverted to you and Epel. Every time you go out, expect to have at least three elderly residents asking when your wedding will be! Most of the time, you’ll laugh it off and assure them that you’re happy. But it’s happened so much that Epel begins thinking about it.

He brings it up to you one day in the orchard, lying in the grass with his legs propped up on a tree. This is the first time you’ve discussed marriage, and you come to an agreement- if your relationship in Harveston works out, in a year or two you’ll get married. It’s a simple plan, but people can’t help but notice Epel has a spring in his step now when he talks about his new fiancée.

With his degree in magical chemistry and background as a farmer in Harveston, Epel will always be financially stable. He is one of the few young people in the town and the older residents welcome the help with labor. With extra income from occasional jobs Vil will call in with, you guys are set! You have plenty of time to spend with Epel every day. It’s quite the pleasant life.

Your marriage to Epel will take place in the town hall. Every Harveston resident will attend, as well as many of your friends from your days at Night Raven College. The village elders insisted on doing everything themselves- making food, catering, helping with clothing and ceremony. It’s been decades since they were last able to prepare for a wedding party!

Originally, the gathering was planned to be relatively small, with just friends, family, and locals. But word got out that the Vil Schoenheit would be attending the event in place of the Bride’s father, and security had to be hired. Not only that, but the presence of nobles like Kalim, Leona, and Malleus garnered attention as well. Harveston’s economy got a big boost just from your wedding alone.

Much to Vil’s chagrin, you had hired Neige to be the live performance during your first dance with your new husband. He’ll complain about it for years, even if you reassure him that you would have asked him if he didn’t already have a part in the wedding party.

Epel is secretly smug that so many people are seeing you marry him. You’re his now! He’s yours! Take that, world! Everyone knows you’re Mrs. Felmier now. Speaking of that, Epel wants you to take his last name. He really wants you to be his in that way. He might pout a bit if you refuse but ultimately he accepts your decision. Either way, you’re his wife now! Nobody else’s!

Silver

Two matching silver bands on yours and Silver’s ring fingers are the only indicator to the outside world that you got married in secret, on a humid summer evening before your final year at NRC. Worried about Lilia getting on in years and not being able to see his son’s special day, Silver asked you to marry him in a quiet, extremely private ceremony. Only Lilia, Malleus, and Sebek were present but Silver tried so hard to make it romantic. He promises that once you’re older, you can do it again, properly.

The ring exchange was overseen by Malleus, who had power for every official duty in Briar Valley. For Silver’s own band, he requested the gem on his magical pen to be turned into the centerpiece for his wedding ring. That way, he’ll never be without you or his magic now.

As the only humans in Briar Valley, you and Silver still need protection. Silver would never leave his job as Malleus’s guard either, so you’ll be living in the Thorn Fairy’s Castle for now. As a wedding present, Malleus had a new wing of the castle built just for you and your new husband, complete with a tower. It’s spacious and supposed to provide more privacy for newlyweds, but Lilia has a bad habit of barging into the rooms anyways, gushing about how his little boy is all grown up. If you need a place for more private affairs, the cottage out back might be a better location.

When you return to NRC for your final year, the rings on yours and your husband’s hands aren’t hidden. No one seems to notice, though. Not even the observant ones like Azul and Jamil. If they do, they probably assume that the rings are promise rings. Silver doesn’t bother to correct them- he’s wary of telling people already, lest someone target you for it. Stolen kisses in empty corridors are good enough… for now.

Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

[gomzdrawfr]

want to join the fandom cause it seems fun seeing fanarts and you and others interacting but I don't know how...and with the whole ai thing im scared...

my advice: just do it

really! sometimes all you really need is a leap of faith, and that was exactly how I dropped into the cod fandom. When I joined the ghoap discord server I talked to one of the artist I really like and respected from my lurking time (hi @bressynonym) aaaand the rest is history

I didnt know how to draw properly, nor digitally, all I did was scribbling on OneNote (yeah!) and rambled about cod characters, it is daunting and it is scary to interact but after a while? you may just be able to find someone to brainrot together with

start small, like commenting, reblogging, talking, chatting- doesn't have to be towards artist/writers, it could be the art/fic enjoyers!

you need to put yourself out there if you want something

as to if you want to start in the fandom as a creator, here's some more tips (which are all based on my experience, I am no pro at doing this, hell Im still learning myself, and I am by no means speaking these on behalf on others!)

establish a goal: what are you making? fandom based? original creations?

as with starting new, everything may take a while for stuff to happen, you'll feel like you're speaking to the void at times (esp with original arts, but do know that your stuff do get perceive by others as time goes, I would advise to draw fandom stuff as a beginning to get that boost going if you want! or else it's going to be quite hard to get things rolling)

imo this is hardest part of any new creator, you'll have to bear with it and try not to give up (but I understand how incredibly demotivating it could get, there were times when I stopped posting about Raven entirely, but eventually I post it anyway cuz surely someone out there will like them, it just takes a lot of patiences and perseverance)

btw, engagement can also vary from time to time, you may be booming for a bit, then suddenly you dont, it is a cycle that will bound to happen

take rest regularly, and I mean a break from social media because numbers, discourse and everything can get to you, very quickly (I cannot emphasise this enough)

the numbers are not worth it over your mental health (comes with practice to really solidify this thought)

study the algorithm (pain): see what other creators are doing to get where they are, what tags are they using in their post? what features/niche do people like?(this is, if you really want to grab some form of engagement, bcuz reminder in the end you are creating art for yourself first!)

example: I think posts would get more reach if you tag it with the ship name first, followed by the characters' name (doesn't work all the time tho)

that's the thing about algorithm, it is ever-changing, and you'll have to learn to adapt with it when it does!

expanding on that, studying algorithm could be about ships (for example, ghostsoap is most popular in the fandom), or really good rendered art/flashed out fic that leaves your jaw on the floor, or ships that gets lesser attention in general which puts you, who make content about them, easier to be brought into the light (like Faralex)

bUT, it can also be personality!

(again, not saying this is meant for everyone and strictly from my own experience + what I observe) for me, I made up the lack of my art by establishing a personality: a wild panda who yaps about price and their oc and also kinda everywhere in the place (just like this post LOL), OR you're the person who named themselves after Soap's ash particle number OR you're the one who likes bottom Ghost- literally anything goes, you want to make an impression in different ways, some more funny/goofier than others but it works (be mindful and stay respectful tho, dont wanna be the asshole in the fandom now do ya?)

efforts ≠ engagement (not all the time, but most time) and this is a fact. Sometimes, you can't expect a piece you did for 10+ hours to get thousands views and likes, especially in a fandom space. You need to understand algorithm is that wonky. (very disheartening, but again, you make the art for you and the few others who genuinely likes them, and those people can go a long way) be mentally prepared for such events, and try not to beat yourself up too much for it

ultimately tho, do it, do it scared but do it anyways and again, draw the things that bring you joy, I hope these could be helpful in some ways!

[the-smiling-doodler]

What is the difference between twitter and tumblr

there's a lot of differences between them, from community to functionality. we'd be here all week if i listed every single one, so i'm just gonna name a few: 1. the community on tumblr is a lot more chill than the one on twitter. tumblr users HIGHLY encourage curating your own experience, it's basically impossible to be on tumblr for a while without seeing at least one post encouraging you to unfollow/block people you dont vibe with, not respond to hateful asks and block mean anons, and filter tags you dont like. this isn't to say that other apps don't do the same thing, but in my experience, tumblr users are far more vocal about it. it's very ingrained in the app's culture as a whole. linking this back to the SC fandom real quick: I've only been faced with one drama on tumblr, compared to twitter where it seems like every fucking day some new shit pops up. tumblr-exclusive SC fans are largely unaware of any of the crazy shit that goes on on twitter. i keep saying this to my moots but it is genuinely far more peaceful on here than on twitter. 2. tumblr is also more slow-paced than twitter because the character limit on this app is HUGE (4096 characters per text block, and tumblr allows a total of 1000 content blocks per post, meaning that if you use every content block you have exclusively for text, the total character limit is 4,096,000 characters per post. thats like 630154 - 819200 words !! also, reblogs count as their own post, and you can reblog a post a near infinite number of times (ignoring the 250 post limit a day.)), which i think is part of the reason why this app is more chill. it's less stressful, it feels like you can take your time on here. this isn't mentioning that you can attach up to 10 images to a post, making tumblr a better app for both writers and artists compared to twitter. the more you stay on this app, the more you notice that a lot of posts are very long. 3. i've said this on another post of mine (which i really recommend reading if you have the time because i talk a lot about the importance of reblogging posts on tumblr, among other things), but I'll say it here again: while the community on tumblr is more chill, it's also very quiet. a lot of tumblr users have become very passive in their engagement with posts, only liking and never reblogging. in my personal experience, i've found that you get far more engagement and reach on twitter than on tumblr (emphasis on personal experience, because a few of my friends have told me that they actually get more interaction on tumblr than on twitter.) in short: twitter is where you go to get famous, tumblr is where you go to hang out with friends. 4. this point came from my friend @buggyboo-exe, he said: "I'd add the fact that Tumblr allows for more, how do I say, personal interaction? On Twitter sure, you can follow people and see just your follower's posts and everything but Tumblr not only has the ask box, it also gives you the feature to answer those asks privately. I think it's just easier to make friends on Tumblr and actually keep those friends long term than on Twitter. Likely due to the slow paced thing as well. I'm not sure how to explain it better. Tumblr also started the whole "moots" thing I believe so followers are always seen more as friends then anywhere else." I think this point is very solid because, yes, although I think twitter is better in terms of quantity of engagement, tumblr allows for deeper, more personal interaction. a lot of my closest friends on this fandom are ones I've made on tumblr. I feel way more comfortable goofing around and being silly with them publicly on here than on twitter.

5. this is something I wanted to add to the post i linked in point 3 but forgot to, and that is that tumblr is more or less timeless. it's very, very, VERY common to come across posts from as far back as 15 years ago. you basically never see twitter posts ever again if they weren't made this year, but on tumblr? it's not unusual to see a post from 2015 circulating. it's not weird to reblog art or writing from months or years ago. it's also not weird to go through an artist's blog and just reblog/like all their posts in one sitting. (also, reblogging a post means you get to keep a copy of it on your blog forever. meaning that even if a user deletes their blog, or deletes the post itself, as long as you've reblogged it it's never truly gone. reblog your favorite posts if you wanna keep them with you forever!!) 6. tumblr users REALLY stress anonymity. one of the first things i told my twitter mutuals was to PRIVATE YOUR LIKES AND FOLLOWING TABS !! no one wants or needs to see that stuff. this is your personal blog, you're allowed to and even encouraged to keep things about yourself private. it is usually extremely easy to tell who is and isnt a tumblr user, because twitter users tend to: have their likes and following visible, don't have a blog title, dont have a personal blog theme, and only like posts with little to no reblogs.

I'll cut myself off here because this post is getting very long, but yeah, there's a LOTTTT of differences. i hope this answered your question !! and to anyone reading this, feel free to ask me if you have any other questions about being on tumblr. I know a lot of you are new here and i LOVE to yap, so i'd be happy to answer !!

[diazfox]

(A tentative guess about your BuckTommy vs Buddie post)

I guess a big part of it is because it's canon ? It's canon and it seems to work, and it seems to be make Buck calm and fluffy and happy in a healthy way, which is what a lot (all ?) of us want. So we can get behind that, for now.

Your "why not a similar support behind his exes / fetishizing MM relationship" question is valid and i think the difference is because it's the first time someone Buck dates seems to really fit with him without having something that we can pre-shot is going to be a problem, and the first time he goes into a relationship (getting myself ahead of things there) without it being to heal something in him ? And as I've read other people point out, Tommy's not silo-ed out, he has a backstory with the Begins episodes, he is friends with some of the 118, so it makes him less of a plot device than Buck's female exes.

And about the second part, the fetishizing part, i think sadly it's just a real thing that happens here, on tumblr and in fandom spaces : men are seen enjoying being together and fandom smooches them together together. One could even argue that it's the same for Buddie, wanting them to be together together when canon just factually says they are BFFs. I don't think anyone is erasing anything, but all that is canon about Buddie is that they are BFFs (a lot can be read as more that friends but ultimately it's with shipping goggles on, only - i'm not a very optimistic person, though).

I guess some of us think that if they didn't make Buddie happen for this long, then it may be because it is meant to stay on the fandom shipping side ? And we're given this incredible chance to have a canon lgbt character with an unusual story of self-discovery that doesn't happen a lot in tv shows so we're just enthusiastic to go with the flow ?

And if it turns out that the writers have the guts to get Eddie his own self-discovery journey, and if that later leads to Buddie happening somehow, then I think all BuckTommy shippers will be glad that it finally happened, and that it is canon, and is finally the Truth.

damn, thanks for your insight! i do see how things being canon and properly canon (like Tommy having a "backstory") can cause shifts in perspectives looking into the future.

i 100% understand why some might think buddie is a form of fetishization too. ngl i've seen strong arguments like "why can't 2 male characters share a strong emotional bond platonically? why does it have to lead to romance?" i guess my main reason for bringing up fetishization with respect to bucktommy is the fact that they are quite lacking in the "strong emotional bond" department. so it feels pretty much like "2 hot guys kissing and touching each other hell yeah" to me.

but i realise i'm overlooking the fact that this is bi buck's first relationship, though. i forgot to consider the fact that majority of this support for tommy comes from the fact that this is the first love interest of buck's to whom he can give all of himself and get twice as much with all the freedom in the world AS A BI MAN. thank u for putting me on to the fact that i've been misinterpreting this enthusiasm to some degree.

thats not to say that just bc something is canon or just a headcanon everything is set in stone. writers and actors themselves have made it very clear time and time again that audience reactions and engagement matters when it comes to plot development. in your own line of thought, right until 7x 03 they didn't make bi Buck happen for so long. so would u say it was meant to stay merely on the fandom shipping side? i just think the possibilities are endless, and maybe we as a fandom can try to have a bit more resilience to see through fan-originated storylines instead of a "i'll just go with whatever is canon bc it's easier" ethic.

[wyervan]

hiiii just wanna start off by saying I love your art style and general vibes ✨️ I'm a stay-at-home partner always in search of fun things to do, and I've recently gotten back into art after not engaging with it since I was a kid (largely because your sun n moon fixation rubbed off on me 😭). I've never tried digital art and it looks cool! Do you have any advice for a beginner like me?

Oh it makes me so happy when people say I inspired them to start creating again 😭 The DCA and the fandom brought me out of my own years-long artistic funk last spring. Clown power, yeehonk 🤠 🤡

I’m planning a significantly longer post in response to an ask I got ages ago all how I learned to draw the way I do, so lookout for that.

But in the meantime, here’s a couple things I can think of off the top of my head:

Specific tools don’t matter much. I currently use Procreate and would recommend it if you have an IPad. It’s an extremely simple but effective program.

On desktop, I use Clip Studio Pro, but Krita is another program I’ve used and liked AND it’s completely free.

I do also have loads of experience with Photoshop and other Adobe products but can’t recommend them at the price, not to mention they’re not super beginner friendly.

Hardware-wise, I almost exclusively use my IPad to draw because it’s so portable. I also have a Huion Kamvas pen tablet monitor that hooks up to my desktop. But I started doing digital art with a dinky lil Wacom tablet that was less than $100. There’s definitely a bit of a disconnect at first, not looking at where you’re drawing but rather on a screen, but you get used to it.

Bottom line is to use whatever tools are convenient and comfortable for you! I even know of a great artist that exclusively draws with their mouse. I realized I hated sitting at a desk and that stopped me from practicing digitally. I got an IPad and now it’s much easier for me to work comfortably on what I love.

Point two I’d like to make is take advantage of the capabilities of working digitally. This means using the godsent undo button to your heart’s content. Download fun brushes to play with and add texture. Use perspective grids. Turn on line stabilization so your strokes are extra smooth. Like what you’ve sketched so far but want to try something different? Duplicate the layer and work from there so you can go back to the old version if you change your mind. Radically change the colors or values with adjustment layers. Use clipping masks. Abuse the liquify tool.

A lot of this might sound like gobbledygook to a digital art beginner but just googling any of this terminology will get you loads of tutorials and information for your specific setup. Also I’m happy to go into details about specific digital art techniques I’ve picked up with over a decade and a half of experience.

Finally, and most importantly—make what you want to see in the world AND what feels good to make. This ofc is not exclusive to digital art, but I always want to stress this to new artists. I realized after I got into the DCA fandom that I had been letting shame, fear, and perfectionism keep me from creating the content I was really interested in making. But then man, idk. Frickin’ robot clowns amirite ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it’s like there was a secret agent sent into my brain and he uploaded a DCA virus into my mainframe or smth idk hacker style. tktktktkt. they’re in.

Anyway. Hope this helps! Feel free to send another message if u have more questions :3

[zepskies]

Hey, Zep! Quick question-

How did you manage to build your Tumblr following?

Ahh, great question, lovely anon!

A few key things I've done to build my following:

1. Posting my stories consistently. ✍🏽

When I started getting active on Tumblr last year, the lovely feedback I was getting spurred me on to keep writing, so I did! I wrote more last year than I probably ever have. But I also try to do so consistently.

I give people a heads up on when things are going to post (Marketing 101: If you want people to get excited, make sure they know when things are coming their way). And I did my best to stick to those deadlines.

Life can sometimes get in the way (shit happens, amirite?), but on the whole, I try to stay consistent. When people know they can rely on you, they're more likely to tune in every time you post.

I also give sneak previews of chapters and upcoming stories for that same reason. (I write chapters ahead of posting partly for this reason.) It can be a powerful hook when I'm writing a series in particular, to keep people invested by giving them a preview of what's coming in the next chapter. 💗

2. I try to make it easy for people to find me. 🧐

Use the right # tags. If it's an OC character in a pairing, don't use the reader tag (and vice versa). But do use the most popular pairing tags relevant to your story, fandom, character tags, genre, etc.

Tumblr currently allows you up to 30 tags that can be optimized/indexed by the site.

Anything after that is just to organize your blog and make things easier to find. I've seen a lot of brilliant writers/content creators miss out on getting eyes on their post because they're not using the more popular search tags.

(Tumblr helps you find some of them when you start typing in the tags section of a post.)

I also reorganized my masterlist so that the characters I write for are as easy as possible to find, what pairings I write for, and how people can keep reading if it contains multiple parts (including a link in the previous part, clearly labelling, including links to my other relevant masterlists within the fandom).

I include links everywhere: for my fic library side blog, for my masterlists, for sequels, other stories within the same storyverse, for my Ao3 account, for my Patreon, etc. I’ve worked in content marketing and editorial, so I've learned that navigation is key for the reader/user experience.

**Special Note on tag lists: Tumblr recently changed the rules (again). It seems that you can have up to 50 tagged users on a post, but they must be broken up into groups of 5 for the site to properly tag those users.

Example:

3. Engaging with people and replying to comments, reblogs, and asks. 💞

#1, this is just good fun. I LOVE engaging with people who read my work, and often I've become friends with people on here just by reaching out to one another to express our mutual love of fandom and/or each other's work.

At the ends of one-shots, drabbles, and series chapters, I try to engage with my readers by asking them specific questions about what they thought about the story. If they feel inclined, that may provoke them to answer in the comments or in the form of a reblog.

And when I reply to reblogs in particular, there's a reason I label them "reader appreciation." Because I genuinely do appreciate them! (And you. 😉)

Writers thrive on feedback, and I'm no exception. But also, it's just awesome to have that connection with my lovely readers. Many of them are now my friends. 🥰

Thank you for this question! I hope this helps.~

[fandomfluffandfuck]

I’m in a very medical kink mood so I reread your post about Steve medical kink (blow me over with a feather 🥵) and now I’m very curious how you would see post-TWS Bucky engaging with medical kink. He has a lot of trauma around medical procedures, obviously, and maybe he wouldn’t like being strapped down, but maybe…

One day Bucky makes his own eggs instead of waiting for Steve to get back from his run and do it, and Steve throws out a line like, “Wow, you’re growing into a real big boy, Buck,” and Bucky just… freezes. A memory comes back of little, late blooming Steve being jealous and fascinated when Bucky went through puberty before him, and how they’d stay up late at night with Steve asking Bucky about his check-ups. Why’d he feel your chest, did he really touch your private parts, did he say when you’re gonna get all hairy? Bucky didn’t understand the shivers that went through him then at 12, but now -

He pictures Steve asking similar things, but as his doctor. Have you been getting erections at night? Yes, Bucky, an erection IS when your penis gets bigger, you’re so smart… Oh, not just at night? When your teacher leans over your desk you become aroused? I see. That’s perfectly normal for a growing boy, and I see you growing so well. Must be eating your vegetables to get such thick hair under your arms and around your genitals. Lie back for me, please, Bucky, I need to make sure you’re developing properly. You’ve been such a good little boy but it will be time to be a big boy soon…

……….. So. If you want to expand on that.

this medical kink drabble

Mmm. I like the way you think.

I would definitely, definitely see Bucky having problems with anything involving doctors and people he doesn't know touching him post-HYDRA, like, even barber shops and hair salons are out of the picture because of the chair you have to sit in, the sharp objects, the sudden movements, the sudden movements behind you, and... yeah. I can understand why it would be triggering for Bucky for the rest of his life. No matter how many times he tries it. It might be easier, but it'll probably never be the way it was before.

However--

If there's anything to override those triggers (as is canon), it's Steve.

Steve stirs up old memories all the time, but since Bucky feels those shivers, as they shoot up his spine and spread over his arms and neck, he just can't stop thinking about it. What was that? Why? What about it?

And I know that you mentioned puberty check-ups, which I fucking love that, the new, exciting changes, the uncertainty, the on-edge of flaring hormones, the awkwardness and humiliation that can be confused with the heat of arousal... that all makes for a delicious mess.

But you know what I can't stop thinking about since you sent this in?

Follow me for a minute--

With all of Steve's ailments pre-serum, it's semi-common in the fandom to have pre-serum Steve, especially when he's in an alternative, modern univere, need glasses. And if Steve has glasses...

Can you imagine Bucky's curiosity about what happens when Steve goes to the optometrist?

Bucky's never had problems with his eyes. In fact, whenever they check his vision in school, they always tell him his eyes are better than average. So, he's got no fucking clue what it's like to go to a doctor that specializes in eyes. He has no idea what they do to Steve to send him home with pupils so wide that they swallow all of his blue irises. He feels...

He feels kind of jealous, if he's dead honest.

According to Steve, the nurses that see him before the eye doctor always coo at him and call him "darling" or "precious" and spend more time than necessary staring into his eyes. Steve grumbles about it. It feels like pity to him. Like they're making fun of him. Treating him like a child.

Meanwhile, at the description, Bucky's teeth sink into his lower lip. First, he's thinking of is the attention and the way it would make the hairs on his arms stand on edge. Then, as he continues to get lost in his head, he thinks about looking directly into Steve's eyes. The hypnotic blue color of them. He thinks about cupping Steve's chin and caressing his cheekbones and eyebrows and that handsome bump on his nose. He thinks about how hot and shivery he feels when Steve has him sit still and pose for a drawing, all of Steve's attention on him... would it be like that? If he were in Steve's shoes. All of their attention on him, face-to-face, telling him his chin is sweet, his jaw is handsome, and--

There's something so alluring about this place Steve goes that Bucky doesn't. It's a different world.

He's so curious about it.

The optometrist remains alluring and mysterious all the way until Bucky's early adulthood when suddenly, after a concussion from boxing, he goes to the eye doctor because he can't focus his eyes so well. It's what his general doctor recommends.

Eventually, the problem with his eyes turns out to be nothing--resolving itself--but... the day it happens, he's seeing double. The nurse that sees him before the doctor is his age and she's got blonde hair, it's pinned back, making it look short, she also has blue eyes with hints of green, pink, full lips, and she, just, looks like Steve. That nurse kisses him in the exam room when they're alone after quiet, intense, face-to-face compliments. Just like Steve described.

The experience leaves an impression on Bucky.

He's still scrambled from his concussion, and he's half-convinced the nurse kissing him is Steve--who he wants the most, who he's wanted since before he knew what wanting was. In the dim, warm exam room, he feels safe. A little dizzy and buzzing with soft heat, his skin prickling pleasantly, Bucky feels good. It feels better than any kiss he had had before.

Now, post mission check-ups and Steve pull that memory out of Bucky and... he yearns. At first, he's sure it was Steve who was in the exam room with him, no matter how little sense it makes. Why would Steve have come to that appointment with him?

Eventually, Bucky sorts it, and he... he manages to pull the words out of himself. Asking Steve if they can try that. Whatever it is.

Roleplay?

Medical kink?

ASMR?

Meditation?

Whatever it is, Steve orders a bunch of props for them to play with. If Bucky wants something, Steve will go through hell and high water to get it for him. He deserves it. They end up with a snellen chart, an ophthalmoscope, a retinoscope, a pin light, a handheld eye occluder, colored pens, and, of course, Steve has his hands to perform other tests that fancy instruments aren't used for. Following his fingers, testing peripheral vision, holding fingers up, wiggling his fingers at the edges of his vision, and other things that Steve may or may not come up with on the fly.

When the whole haul arrives, they can play.

Steve dims the lights, he puts Bucky on their bed, his back against the headboard, arms limp by his sides, and he eases him into it. Starting slow, allowing the atmosphere and tension to build. Steve places his hands on Bucky's face, caressing him gently, like he's made of porcelain. He touches him. His collarbones, his throat, his jaw, his lips, his cheekbones, his nose, his eye sockets, his eyebrows, his scalp, and his ears. Checking him over in an extremely intimate way; they're practically pressed together and there's no distraction of anything needing to happen, this isn't leading anywhere more. Steve's just touching him. Making sure he's okay.

Examining in a loving, affectionate way that's masked by a mock-professional setting.

Bucky feels him heart speed in his chest at the same time that he sinks into relaxation. This is Steve. He can trust Steve. Inherently. He's not even thinking about trusting him. He doesn't feel unsafe, he feels... excited.

The pent-up breath in Bucky's chest leaves in a big rush as he closes his eyes to have Steve sweep his thumbs over the back of his eyelids. It's nothing but good.

It's thrilling and relaxing.

It's making him vibrate in place, but not because he's restless. He doesn't totally know what he is, but somehow, he doesn't mind.

Steve praises him along the way, touching, touching, touching, "good boy," he murmurs, feeling his quickening pulse. Then, "good job, that's it, just like that," when he looks in the directions Steve tells him to, straight up, up to the left, up to the right, straight down, down to the left, down to the right, left side, right side. "Perfect. You're doing so well." He tucks a strand of Bucky's hair behind his ear, drawing his nail gently over his eyebrows, feeling his skill, "mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm, everything looks great. Just like it should." His breath is warm as it brushes across Bucky's face. The reminder that he's so close has Bucky's hands reaching up to grasp his arms. Yet, Bucky only hovers--he drops his hands on second thought. He wants to sink into this.

"Good."

Bucky's eyelids feel heavy, almost having a difficult time opening his eyes when instructed next. Follow the light, back and forth, back and forth. He does it, though. Just managing.

Steve starts to speak but apparently thinks better of it and adjusts his head with two fingers under his chin instead of directing Bucky to do it himself. Tipping his head back and up. Every time Steve touches him, Bucky feels sparks tremble through him. He wants to follow these orders. So badly. He wants to do as he says. He wants to be rewarded with sweet words and more touches.

Steve's thumb strays, pressing into the dimple in his chin. Under his breath, he breaks the scene, swearing, "fuck, you're pretty, baby." Then, as if he can't stop himself, he reaches out and squeezes the back of his neck.

All the weight on Bucky's shoulders disappears. He feels like he must suddenly be sitting up straighter from the relief of mass yet at the same time like he's slouched down even farther down.

When they come to the chart, Steve lays it on even thicker, "that's it, perfect answer again, you're a sharp one, aren't you?"

Bucky lets go of a soft mewl, his tummy all tight and squirmy. The praise is working its way under his skin. Collecting and wrapping tight, wrapping him up in a blanket, leaving him hot. Blushing.

Steve pretends he didn't hear and instead points to the next line. Bucky can still read it. Steve shakes his head in a disbelieving way, "those eyes of yours really aren't just for show, such a pretty color and shape, they're just perfect. Best sight I've tested."

As it continues, dragging out, stretching time like warm taffy between sugary fingertips on a contagious laughter filled summer afternoon, Bucky starts to feel drunk. What he remembers drunk feeling like--slow and lazy and underwater, if water were glittering, bubbly champagne.

It's sweet and easy, the answers to anything Steve asks him just fall out of his lips. Bucky isn't sure he even hears the questions; he isn't sure his words make any sense or if he's slurring, drunk; he doesn't know anything but the moment. He's here. Steve's here. Steve's practically hand-feeding him soft touches and praise and is so close without giving him any of the touch or words he's craving to hear.

It's relaxing and it's maddening.

It's almost like he's been hypnotized.

Guh.

With all those intoxicating feelings inside, Bucky doesn't notice how throbbing hard he is between his legs until Steve pushes their foreheads together. They must be nearing the end, the scene falling apart at the edges. The illusion unraveling.

Bucky gasps. Shocked. Still swimming in thick, warm syrup.

Steve is grabbing his jaw tightly all of a sudden. It's not clinical. It's intimate. Possessive. Like he can no longer resist. Not remaining as far away as he can while still doing a proper examination but fully pressing tight to Bucky now. His chest against Bucky is hard and hot. Overwhelming. The sudden lapful of Steve is perfect.

The erotic, addictive feeling of being desirable and irresistible floods into Bucky. Steve can't keep himself away anymore.

A moan simply escapes him.

Steve rasps, "that's it," he shakes his chin, teasing, "you did so good, baby--"

Bucky whimpers, soft but so needy.

"--You deserve a reward, but I don't want you to look away from me," Steve tells him while keeping one hand on Bucky's face while his other wraps around Bucky's cock. Stroking him dangerously slow. Uuuuuuuuup and dooooooown, uuuuuuuuup and dooooooown, uuuuuuuuup and dooooooown.

Bucky shakes. His eyes slide shut in pleasure. He wants to crawl out of his oversensitive skin, after just strictly "professional" touching, even the slow, frustratingly gentle and slow sexual touch is impossibly good.

"No. Look at me." Steve demands.

Bucky whines and forces his eyes open when Steve's fingers threaten to bite into his chin. His eyelids are so heavy! His vision is so unfocused. Steve's so close to him.

So close.

"Mmm-hmm, yeah, keep looking, and I'll keep going, just like this," he rambles, it washes over Bucky.

They breathe each other in.

Steve is hardly reacting while Bucky's chest is heaving, and with the effort of keeping his eyes open and on Steve, they're tearing. Vision blurring even more. Oh. Oh. It feels good. It feels so good. Steve's hand on him. Stroking him. Steve's eyes on him. Intense and hot. Steve's words caressing him. Sweet, praising words. Pleasure slow but consistent. It's, it's--

It's working so good for Bucky.

Better than it should.

God.

All he's doing is touching him lightly, it shouldn't have Bucky on the edge already!

Fuck.

It does, though. Bucky wants--

He wants--

Fuck.

He wants to cum.

Steve, staring into his eyes, knows. He knows everything. He is staring into Bucky's soul. His flesh and bone, body, mind, and soul. Bucky has never been more naked.

"Now." Steve orders.

Bucky doesn’t even register his obedience. His body has done this too many times for it to need to ask his conscious mind's permission. His body is simple. It does.

Wrecked, Bucky cries out, tears spill over his eyes, rolling down his hot cheeks, and his mouth drops open wide, drooling a little. Also, with the force of the pleasure, Bucky curls forward and drops his forehead into the crook of Steve's neck. Trembling all over, hanging onto Steve for dear life.

Oh. Oh. Oh.

Steve pets his hair, rumbling, "good boy, gooood boy," with the praise, Bucky jolts again and again, cumming again, or maybe more. He doesn't know. It doesn't matter. It just feels so fucking good.

God.

So this is, uh, optometrist hypnosis? 🤷🏻‍♂️ I hope you like it!

Also, I hope you don't mind me taking your prompt and writing something else with it! Because I fucking love, love, LOVE your idea, but I couldn't get this out of my mind, so it had to happen.

[myteavsricochet]

First of all I hope I'm not overstepping by doing this on your blog and for staying off anon because I'm frankly too old to be hiding behind the little gray icon dude I've been doing the fandom thing for close to 15 years (God I'm old).

As someone who came back to tumblr (hadn't opened tumblr in like 6 years) exclusively to keep an eye on the TZP tag because he's the first actor I have a genuine interest in years, not only because he's the most beautiful man I've ever seen but also because he's engaging and funny and charismatic and because I think he could really go places if he was allowed good roles, actors can be naturally talented but most actors really get their chops from working with good directors and actively learning on set from their peers.

(As a disclaimer, I love Nick he's great and I hope his career thrives.)

Which is why the fact that people who constantly compare his career to Nick's is incredibly belittling, as your anons pointed out Taylor isn't white and that cuts the roles he can auditioned for by like 80%, the fact of the matter is TZP is always going to have a hard time finding roles because to most casting directors casting a white man is going to be easier than having to make space for a POC.

I can only assume that most of the vitriol from Nick's (who is an absolutely lovely dude) fans comes from plain old jealousy, TZP is out here hustling, attending events, etc. While Nick is not, how this is somehow Taylor's fault in their eyes? I don't even want to guess. The truth of the matter is that Taylor has to do all those things because he runs the risk of fading, he needs the networking and the connections if he wants to continue his career which is a sad truth.

On the topic of fashion, I'm only a casual observer but my god is it hard in the fashion world. Making a foothold in an industry that is filled with old brands set in their ways and where nepotism is rampant, more so than Hollywood, is almost impossible so that fact that Taylor has is beyond impressive. A career in fashion could even be more lucrative for him than an acting career which is unpredictable, a lot of people forget fashion is not just the models and the designer but all the behind the scene people that run the fashion houses, so saying Taylor is just a fashion boy? Sure, but fashion would be an amazing career path to follow, specially because Taylor believes deeply in sustainable fashion, he could really make a difference working in a behind the scenes role.

Ngl I've been giggling about the anon saying that Taylor isn't filming anything right now because he said he had a movie coming up, as if saying that somehow makes Taylor a liar. Here's the thing about that no one is filming anything right now, award season just started, Hollywood is too busy making nice with each other to make movies or shows right now, half the battle of winning awards is kissing the ass of the voters, as someone who enjoys the fashion of award season the sheer amount of events for the next month or so is wild, the stars are going to be very busy looking pretty.

No point to this rant really, just as someone who chooses to lurk around here and other places, is really starting to grind on my gears that some of Nick's fans will put down Taylor for no really reason while I've never seen this behavior from a Taylor towards Nick.

Again you don't have to post this if you don't feel comfortable.

I'm posting this ask of yours because I feel genuinely that you don't want to put one of the boys down in any way and I absolutely agree with all the points 😊

Unfortunately this comparison has been going on since the movie came out and it seems like there can never be a fandom in the world without toxic elements that only cause problems for the other costar and other fans 🥴

I want to specify that obviously it's not everyone, there are a lot of people who support both of them OR they mainly support Nick but they show respect to Taylor as it should be even if they don't follow him beyond rwrb. But there are people who are terrified there is someone other than Nick out there who is appreciated and loved and continuing to tear Taylor down like that only shows how privileged they are for not seeing the reality and the struggle that poc have to do, and Taylor specifically in this moment, in that industry.

Nick doesn't even need this attitude, which he would never tolerate and doesn't bring him anything good but who knows if they'll ever understand.

By the way how sad and insensitive it is after seeing a movie like rwrb and the people who worked on it and seeing how much heart they put into it to keep saying that Nick is the only good one who works and will works and he is done and over rwrb and he doesn't need that movie when even Aneesh some days ago in her stories said she hasn't had any roles yet and is it so difficult for her to find a job?

And they use the white actor (with immense talent, who deserves everything, let's clarify that again) against people who don't know when they will find a new place for them? so horrible.

I agree with every point and I don't have much to add and thank you for writing to me without the gray icon 😊🙏🏻

[st-dorothy-minority]

Fic Writing & Fandom Nostalgia

To any/all that checked out my HH fic "You Didn't Know," I want to sincerely thank you. I loved writing every bit of it and sharing it. Reading the comments brought me so much joy. Seriously, I got so giddy seeing a new email come through with a comment!

If you read the latest chapter shortly after I posted it, you may have missed the note I added saying it was going into an indefinite hiatus. I'm calling it quits on writing. (Maybe for now, maybe forever)

I go through periods where I want to "burn it all down" because I get caught up in the comparison game. My writing isn't as good or creative as other authors. I never get as much attention or comments as other authors, and I have nowhere near the popularity level of artists. I think of all the ways my writing sucks and "why didn't I come up with *that* idea? They're so good (author or artist), why do I even bother putting out my stuff? No one would notice if I just disappeared and stopped posting."

I've been working on my tumultuous relationship with fic and fandom in therapy (yes, it's embarrassing to have to explain what fandom/fic is to your therapist 😅), and what I've found at the core is the longing for connection. I keep thinking it will happen, that I'll connect with a reader (or readers), or that I'll get more comments in order to make said connections happen (and receive the validation I am unfortunately conditioned to need), and when it doesn't happen, there's significant disappointment and feelings of worthlessness.

I haven't seen people talk about this, but the way people engage in fandom is so different than it was when I first started 2 decades ago. Back then, there were limited sites people would post to (livejournal, fanfiction.net, and DeviantArt being the main 3 imo), so there was more opportunity to really get to know others. You had your own little communities and friendships formed beyond the centralized community and it spilled over into people's personal LJ's and even the exchange of phone numbers. People left comments regularly on art and fic alike.

Now, there are so many sites to post on, so many more people in fandom (especially with it being more "acceptable" nowadays), and it's much easier to just leave a like/kudos and move on to the next thing rather than staying and engaging. Of course, there are some people who make a name for themselves in a particular fandom and have their regulars who engage, but for the most part - people just don't put in the same kind of effort to engage with the work/creator as they did when I was just starting out. And reading a fic? That takes a lot of effort!! So I can see why fanarts gets way more likes and reblogs than a fic because there's more time that has to be invested to read rather than just look and like.

I miss when I had fandom friends and how we all kind of knew each other. I miss genuine connection. I miss sharing my interests with someone who loves it like I do and will geek out with me.

If any of this resonated, I'm glad I'm not alone 😅💜 just something that has really been on my mind and needed to get it out.

[shedoessoshedoes]

nobody loves me like you love me

Hi hello and welcome to me trying to write about a new ship in a new fandom 😱😱😱😱😱 it's really scary guys. This one's for Book Lovers by Emily Henry because I'm a slut for Charlie Lastra and for engagements. I hope you like it :) Tell me if you do!

wc: 2,753

tw: nsfw

tagging: no one yet bc idk who likes these books eep 🫣

The party’s almost over when Charlie pulls me aside. It was a raging success, celebrating the release of Frigid, Tala’s birthday, and Goode Books’s upswing all at once. Charlie and I flew into Asheville two days ago and are staying for another three; even though our lives are planted firmly in New York, our family is here, in Sunshine Falls, and there’s only so long I can go without seeing Libby, Brendan, and the girls and Charlie can go without seeing his parents. It’s still strange to wake up in a New York that Libby does not inhabit, but the transition was easier than I anticipated. My new job at Loggia helped, distracting me with a heap of manuscripts and a learning curve even a shark struggled to keep up with. When Charlie came back, he helped me, too, holding me when I’d break down after a call with Libby left me feeling a little too empty, taking me to get Thai when I felt like I had no one left for me in the city, and reminding me every day in that Charlie Lastra way of his that it was okay to make choices that are the best for me, not just best for everyone else. “Stephens,” he told me  frequently, “you don’t compromise on anything else. You negotiated this ending for yourself. Enjoy it.” 

I look over to him now, our hands intertwined as we wander through the meadow behind the cabin, where we’re staying for this trip (Charlie graduated from his racecar bed and although we love Libby’s Number Three, neither of us were interested in being up all night with the baby at her house) his capsule wardrobe looking as perfectly polished as ever, even in the June heat. He catches me looking and smiles the smile I love the most, the one that tells me he has a secret tucked up into the corner. “What?” he asks. 

“You know that these shoes aren’t made to go frolicking through a field, Charlie.” I tell him. “I’m planning a way to extract revenge.”

“Stephens, if you feel the same way at the end of this frolic, I’ll let you extract whatever revenge you’d like.” 

I mock gasp. “You’d let me publish Bigfoot erotica under your name?” 

He laughs, shakes his head, and looks over to me. “Yes, Nora Stephens. If you still hate me for taking you on this frolic by the time its over, I’ll let you publish whatever erotica you want. 

“You’re just saying that because Bigfoot secretly gets you off, aren’t you?” 

“Of course,” he tells me with mock seriousness. “There’s nothing sexier than Bigfoot and his big—” 

I slap my hand over his mouth as he laughs. “Don’t you finish that sentence, Charlie Lastra. You’ll damage my ego. I’m supposed to be the sexiest one in your life.” 

His eyes soften, and he does look serious now. “You are, Nora. You’re the most everything in my life.” 

I look away, fighting back tears. It turns out, after a decade of never crying, it’s hard to turn the waterworks off. I get emotional at everything now, from animal commercials (fucking stop laughing, Charlie, the cats are being abused), to the endings of new books (I still love the ones with realistic endings the best, but now I understand why Libby and Mom found them so hard to read), to Charlie Lastra making comments about Bigfoot erotica that somehow feel like so much more. 

We come up to the cabin and Charlie pulls me up to stand on the porch. “Do you remember the first time you saw me in this town? How much you hated me?” 

I laugh, nodding. “I didn’t believe it was actually you at first. I was convinced there must be some Charlie Lastra doppelganger, here to make my life miserable. I didn’t believe you would ever come here willingly.” 

“To be fair, I didn’t come here willingly. I was held against my will and without takeout for months, Nora.” 

I roll my eyes at him. “You know you would drop everything for your family the second they need something again.” 

He hums in agreement. “I think about those first few weeks we were here sometimes. How lucky we are that we ended up in the same room at the same time. How lucky we are that our families love us enough to let us negotiate a happy ending.” 

I understand, suddenly, what is about to happen. The breath punches out of me, and even though I knew this was coming, know what I’m going to say (even if I have to figure out a way to return the ring if it’s horrifyingly ugly), I’m suddenly so nervous that I start to shake. “Charlie,” I whisper. 

He smiles at me. “Nora,” he whispers right back. “Good?” he asks. 

“I think so,” I tell him, voice, body, soul trembling. 

“Good,” he tells me. “Ready?” 

I nod, the words already failing me. Feelings like this cannot be categorized. They cannot be put into boxes. Feelings like this balloon out and over every part of me until I’m consumed, until I feel them from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. 

“You’re perfect for me, Stephens,” he starts. “I think you already know that, but I want to tell you again. I love your nightmare brain. I love your nightmare body. I love your impractical shoes and your fancy underwear and your hour-long skincare routine.” 

“That skincare routine brings me a lot of joy,” I tell him through the tears that are already starting to fall. 

“I know. That’s why I love it. I love all the things you do to bring yourself joy. You spent so much of your life making sure everyone else was happy, Nora, and I’m so fucking proud that you’re able to make decisions now that make you happy. I love that I make you happy. I love your Peloton, and the bodega we go to every Saturday to get bagels, and I love that you wouldn’t leave New York for anything. 

“I love that I’m the only one that understands that you’re harsh because you care. I love that I can tell you things in my horrible, sarcastic way, and you’ll understand exactly what I mean. I love our apartment, and I love being in it with you every day. I love sitting next to you and neither of us talking, because we’re working, or reading, or just being, because we understand each other well enough to know that sometimes less words are more powerful than more.

“But mostly, Nora, I just love you. And I really would like to spend the rest of my life with you. I might want it even more than I want to move out of my racecar bed into Libby’s guest room.” 

“I knew you were just using me for my connections,” I say. He tilts one corner of his mouth up and gets down on one knee. 

“Charlie,” I gasp out, incapable of anything else, as he pulls out a small box. 

“I love you so much I even know that you want to pick out your own ring. So forgive me for offering you an empty box, but please, Nora Stephens, marry me. Let me spend the rest of my life contributing to our DINK lifestyle. Let me be easy for you in the best way possible. Marry me, Nora.” 

I crash to the floor onto my knees so we’re at the same height, cradle his face in my hands, and laugh through my tears. “Yes.” I tell him. “Yes. Yes. Yes.” 

“Yes?” he asks, as though he can’t quite believe this is real. 

“Yes,” I say to him again. “Yes, I love you, thank you for not making me wear an ugly piece of jewelry, yes, yes, yes.” I pull him to me, kissing him, but we’re both laughing too hard to kiss properly, so it’s more of us smiling against each other, foreheads pressed together, every piece of our bodies fitting together. 

Charlie pulls me on top of him so he’s laying on the porch. “Thank God you said yes. I still had a niggling worry that you were going to leave me for Shepherd.” 

“Charlie Lastra!” I exclaim. “How dare you think for a second that I would pick the hot small town farmer over the overworked city executive who has no life because, and I quote, ‘There’s always something too good to read.’” 

He rolls us so I’m laying underneath him. “Well, when you put it that way…” He kisses me again, long and slow and deep, and fuck, I’m so gone for this man. 

I break away, laughing. “Holy shit. We’re going to get married.” 

“I know,” he says, smiling wickedly. “How early is too early to start telling people my wife is a hot, kick-ass editor whose books crack the New York Times bestselling list every time they release?” 

“Mmm, you can brag about me anytime you’d like.” I reach up to kiss him, twining my fingers through his hair. “Mr. Lastra-Stephens.” He nearly chokes, and I pull back, searching his eyes. “Sorry, I know we haven’t talked about names, but–” 

“Shut the fuck up. Of fucking course I’m going to take your name. Fuck the patriarchy and all that. It’s just–” he rolls his hips into mine and I groan. “Really fucking hot to hear you talk like that. Excuse me for reacting.” He kisses my forehead, my cheek, my neck, and then looks back up at me. “Mrs. Lastra-Stephens. Or Stephens-Lastra. Whichever. Whatever. I don’t fucking care.” 

“Lastra-Stephens,” I decide. “It’s alphabetical.” 

He groans. “You really are my perfect woman.”

“I can’t believe you didn’t get me a ring.” I tell him as he rolls off of me so I’m pressed up against his side, my head resting on his shoulder. We’re still on the porch.

He looks down at me, quizzical. “Did you want me to?” 

“No.  I just thought,” I shrug. “You’d think it was weird I wanted to pick it out myself.” 

“Nora. You forget how well I know you. You forget how similar we are. I would want to pick out a piece of jewelry I’m going to wear for the rest of my life, too.” He kisses my hair. “But for the record, I would’ve picked a really good ring.” 

“Oh, yeah? What would it have looked like?” 

“Expensive. Classic. Hot. I’d just find one that reminds me of you, honestly.” 

I laugh, press a kiss to his shoulder. “I’ll let you have input when we pick one in the city, then.” 

“Good.” He leans down to kiss me, then, and this time, there’s more intention behind it. His tongue brushes against mine, and then I’m on top of him, pressing him back into the porch.

He sits me up, still kissing me, and then breaks away to press his forehead to mine. “No offense Stephens, but I’m not having hot engagement sex with you on my parents’ cabin’s front porch.” 

I laugh, climb off of him, and pull him up. “So hot engagement sex is on the table inside?” 

He gives me one of his Charlie looks then, one that tells me that obviously hot engagement sex is on the table inside. He unlocks the door as I press kisses down his neck. “Nora.” 

I smirk. “Charlie.” 

He has me up against the door the second it closes behind us, and then I’m tugging him upstairs. We tumble onto the bed in a tangle of arms and legs, Charlie on top and me underneath. He kisses me hard, presses me into the mattress, pulls my shirt up and tugs my pants off. When he stands up to take his own clothes off, I sit up on my elbows, looking at him. 

“What, Stephens? Regretting your decision already?” 

“You are,” I say, “ridiculously hot.” 

The corner of his mouth ticks up. “I love you too, Nora.” 

Then he’s on top of me again, taking off my underwear, pressing his mouth to me, making me gasp and arch underneath him until I’m coming. He crawls back up me so we’re face to face. “Good?” he asks. I nod. “Keep going?” I nod again, and then he’s pressing inside of me, gasping, until we’re pressed together as tightly as we can be. 

“Fuck, Nora,” Charlie rasps, dropping his head to my shoulder. “We get to do this forever.” 

“I know,” I tell him, flipping us so I’m on top. “Aren’t you glad you got such a good catch?”

“Jesus–fuck–I just can’t believe all my wildest fantasies came true.” 

I hum in agreement and start to move, my stomach already tightening with the anticipation of what’s to come. He only lets me stay in control for a minute, and then rolls me back over to fuck into me slow and deep. I moan, and then I’m coming, clenching down around him, and I can feel him come, too. We stay locked together for what feels like hours before he pulls out and tugs me into his side. 

“Hi,” I say, looking up at him. 

“Hi,” he says back. “Mrs. Lastra-Stephens.” 

I groan. “Fuck, you’re right, that is really attractive.” 

He laughs. “I know, right? It’s almost like it brings out the inner Bigfoot-esque possessiveness we all hold within us.” 

I shove at him, rolling away as I cackle. “You did not just bring Bigfoot into sex.” 

He pulls me back, kissing my left ring finger and then pressing a kiss to my lips. “Of course I did, Nora. Bigfoot is what got us into all of this in the first place.” 

I laugh, thinking of those first texts in Sunshine Falls, of everything that came after it. 

“Did our frolic end well enough for you to convince you not to publish Bigfoot erotica under my name?” 

“Mmm, I don’t know.” I roll to lay on top of him. “Getting engaged to the love of one’s life isn’t quite a momentous enough occasion for me.” 

“Oh, yeah?” 

“Mmhmm.” 

“What if the love of one’s life did this?” He presses a finger into me, right where I need him, and I groan. 

“One might be able to be persuaded.” 

He keeps going, then, until I’m gasping and begging and telling him that of course I won’t publish anything under his name, and then he’s back inside of me, moving until we both tumble over the edge. 

Afterward, we sit on the bed and plan our wedding. We’ll have it in the city, and I already know how I’ll ask them to rearrange Freeman’s Books so we can have our ceremony there, amongst the books that kept me alive, the books that brought us together. We’ll go to our favorite restaurant afterwards, and drink and eat and dance all night. We’ll only invite our immediate family; who else do we need besides Libby and Brendan, Sally and Clint and Carina? I’ll wear a simple dress: long, white, and in Charlie’s words, really fucking hot. He’ll wear the suit that’s already a part of his wardrobe. God forbid he buy new clothes to only wear them once. Our rings will be gold, and they won’t be flashy. Neither of us are trying to prove how much we love each other or how rich we are with these rings. After, we’ll go back to our perfect apartment, and have romantic, dreamy, slow sex. We’ll wake up each morning after that belonging to each other a little more than we did the day before, intertwining our lives until we’re able to live our ending forever. There will never be kids, but there might be a cat. There will always be fights, and there will always be peace after that. There will be love and trust and respect, and I’ve never been so grateful for this man sitting beside me than I do in that moment. 

“I love you,” I tell him for what must be the tenth time tonight, as we’re starting to fall asleep.  

He tugs me into a hug. “I don’t think we could have written a better ending.” 

“No,” I agree, “we couldn’t have. It’s too real to be written.” 

Charlie hums in agreement, and we fall asleep like that, my head on his shoulder, one of his legs in between mine, my hand on his chest, his hand covering mine. It’s perfect. It’s better than anything I could have thought up. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yay!! thank you so much for reading! Likes, reblogs, and comments and constrictive criticism is always welcome. My asks are open: let me know what you want me to write!!

[poisonheart]

I think we need to have an honest discussion about shipping in the ILY fandom, especially as the story unveils relationship dynamics that go beyond platonic moving forward.

We cannot let the past repeat itself.

When the comic started, it was advertised as a romance by Webtoons, but Quimchee had always planned and proposed a mature drama. Around that time, they also began monetizing the platform so they asked her to change some of her dark ideas to fit the requirements advertisers might have pushed for initially.

It was an uncertain time with regards to what was or wasn't allowed.

[The comic was supposed to ramp up with those dark themes around the formal arc and it was going to places that would have been triggering to many readers.]

The editors pushed and sold the concept for a love triangle that was never intended because they probably believed this formula would attract more readers and it did.

Unfortunately, with it came all the bad things, too.

This strategy fostered hostility within the fan base and pressured Quimchee to create content to validate it.

Things got so heated in the fandom that we ended with harassment of not only readers but also of Quimchee—to the point that she understandably withdrew from engaging with the public.

[All while going through health issues and personal struggles, too.]

It was a very dark time in the ILY fandom and many people left the communities that had been built because of it. There were hiatuses, uncertainty, and a lot of things withheld from us due to Webtoons' abysmal communication on behalf of the series' they featured.

But the core problem was that unforgettable toxicity and ship war.

There were people who believed their desires were more important than the well being of a real person and that their vitriol was justified because things didn’t go their way.

They believed Quimchee deserved punishment for it.

There wasn't much outrage directed at Webtoons for their false advertisement or for pressuring her to tweak aspects of the story initially to fit their romance marketing agenda. Why?

Because what Webtoons wanted aligned with their desire and it was easier to pretend that Quimchee was a liar about her plot than admit they were misled by the platform, but most importantly, that their interpretation of the story was always flawed.

Quimchee was harassed constantly across multiple social media accounts and they justified their behavior with logic such as "if she created Character X first, then it means they're the lead" when she had constantly stated that there were three main leads in ILY who were equally important to the whole story.

To accept Quimchee's words would break down their arguments and defy the ideas they had created themselves.

They even believed she "sold herself out by not staying true" to a concept she had come up with in high school. They expected the loose and chaotic musings of a young girl to be the version of ILY we got despite her claims otherwise.

[What's funny is that their idea of what the original was is completely wrong and there is proof of it in all her old drawings and drafts.]

They simply refused to accept reality, substituted their own, and went on a campaign of hatred against her because of it.

Now we're here and the drama begins to show hints of romance through heavy, dark themes, and we're seeing that same deranged toxicity trying to make a comeback in the communities we have left.

Don't feed trolls. Don't give them what they want: attention.

To those who remain readers, I hope you can enjoy the story despite the romantic undertones. If you're unhappy, make fan works. If you're dissatisfied to the point you think harassing others and the creator is justified, then please check yourself and stop. Move on. There are a lot of stories waiting for you to enjoy.

To those who feel like they’ve “won” because of how the canon is playing out—stop it. You’re also part of the problem.

That useless “us vs them” mentality is what got us so far gone last time. That whole ‘we won’ or ‘we’re morally superior’ makes you just as problematic as the people who drove fans and Quimchee away years ago. Please check yourself and stop.

You’re not creating a healthy environment by being that way.

Finally, at the end of the day, everyone behind the computer screen is a person. You should never hurt real people, especially over fiction.

[sleepingdeath-light]

fluff hcs ; luz

requested by ; anonymous (16/06/22)

fandom(s) ; the owl house

fandom masterlist(s) ; here

character(s) ; luz noceda

outline ; “Hii :)) if possible, can I request some fluff headcanons for Luz? Thx!”

warning(s) ; none, just fluff!

she makes good use of all five love languages to show you just how much she appreciates you — placing the most effort into whichever language speaks to you the most

you have one ‘big date’ a week where you do something new that usually takes the entire day — but you also spend time together throughout the week doing menial things like running errands, getting lunch, going on walks and just sitting in and watching ‘your’ series

when you’re together — and if you’re not averse to it — she loves to keep in physical contact with you: hand holding, leaning on your shoulder, side hugs, cheek/nose/jaw/lip kisses, back hugs and so on

you constantly catch her staring at you with this lovestruck look on her face and if you tease her about it she’ll get flustered and talk about how she can’t help it since she has such ‘an amazingly awesome boyfriend/girlfriend/partner/etc.’

talks about you to everyone and anyone that will listen — bragging about your accomplishments and just generally recalling things about you that she adores (willow and hunter are particularly bad for teasing her about it — lovingly of course)

your contact name in her phone is just a string of various heart emojis

calls you tons of adorable nicknames — darling, mi vida, mi corazón, honey, baby, honey bun, sweetheart, sweetie, etc. — it’s to the extent that you’re not sure that she even remembers what your name is

always — always — sends you a good morning and good night text

her lock screen is a picture of the two of you pulling faces from when you went on a date to a local carnival

there have been many times where the two of you have stayed up way past sunrise just laughing and talking and joking — it’s why you have to stay in separate rooms whilst she’s studying because otherwise this woman will not sleep

sleeps best when she knows you’re okay, which translates to late night phone calls that you fall asleep on — her first and then you, because she’s just so comfortable with you that she can’t help it

researches all of your interests and fixations so that she can engage with you about them — always just as excited as you are to chat, learn and participate in them

she makes terrible puns all of the time and groaning will only make her double down — bonus points if you end up laughing

she is 100% the type of girlfriend who would make matching bracelets with you and wear those ‘if lost return to x’ and ‘i’m x’ shirts with you — they’re corny but you love them (and her) regardless

she is adamant about having a mentality of ‘us vs problem’ rather than ‘me vs you’ when you argue — and you two do well to abide by that, for the most part, which makes any conflicts easier to get through and compromise on than they would be otherwise

camila adores you and has privately thanked you for making her daughter so happy

every father’s day luz and yourself take flowers up to her dad’s grave — and you always make sure to clean it up when you’re in the area

she talks about you a lot when she visits him alone and both her and camila always say that he would have loved you

[chanstopher]

(for some reason I can ask via my fan account(

But I just want to say I feel you with the stay and KPop fandom comments. I see so many taking it too far and can't seem to recognise that they are creating parasocial relationships in their heads and narrative around situations they had a 2% outsider view of what's happened - and yet they act like they are coming from facts and reading the minds of others. I find it baffling.

I'm a LOT older, but it's always been nice connecting to those from different age groups via fandoms before. However, KPop ones really push me away from engaging. I try and recall back to my younger days with being in fandoms of pop groups and whilst there may have been issues between people from time to time, I don't recall anything to the level I see in Kpop where people get lynched and fans seemed to have had a firm grasp of reality and their place in terms of being a fan and crossing a celebrities boundaries. I don't think KPop stan's behaviour to be new, but in the age of social media and information being so easily accessible, it seems to have amplified certain types of behaviours and attitudes or, probably more likely, groomed and encouraged certain fan attitudes. I dunno.

someday tumblr will work fully. idk if its a sideblog or just tumblr being insane lol

I do feel like in the 2010"s it was a lot easier to find a corner of any fandom you could just be happy in, but with how many (negative) opinions ppl project constantly now its a lot harder, and then we all get sad about lack of engagement without thinking that maybe its the vobes we give off. like if ur rude or closed off or wont take someone elses opinion ppl are going to be afraid to engage and its sad. when i have a 1d blog i had maybe 4k followers at its peak and i would have dozens of asks a day because ppl were so engaged with everything all the time. now if someone dislikes a song they get death threats lmao. i think its why i make sure to answer asks and talk to anyone who tries to talk to me, i dont want ppl to have such a sad fandom experience. I remember being so excited when big accounts talked to me and were kind and helpful that i always felt like it was part of the experience. like the bigger my blog is the more i feel responsible for being accessible and welcoming because i want that so much for other ppl. i just dont get the amount of hostility and bitchiness that comes alnog with social media now. not that i dont get pissed off or dislike things or even ppl, i just try not to focus on it beyond the necessity (like ppl stealing content or stories)

i will say i find it to be such a weird thing that when i was a teen liking 1d i was so excited they had adult fans (as long as it wasnt weird ppl iykyk) but now a 15 year old will be like you who are the same age as that idol how weird for you to like them?! and im like...... what? i hated ppl thinking the things i liked were a teen or childhood phase when i was young and now ppl get so aggressive about it in the opposite way i get so confused lol in the end im just happy to have my happy little corner where i can ignore all of the weird ass behavior the rest of the internet seems so happy to engage in lol

[feathers-in-the-night]

Ok I think I'm going to do something "crazy".

I know that fandom has changed a lot in the past 5-10 years and that we've all been conditioned to "consume content" over actually "admiring art, watching movies, reading books" etc. I've heard that people get less and less engangement on their fics - I just didn't realize how bad it was.

I think as I wrote this fic, I built the anticipation up in my head. I kept thinking about how excited I was for people to read it and to see their reactions and such. That's my mistake - I built it over in my head for almost two years.

I admit I'm spoiled - it's rare for ficwriters to have as much engagement as I enjoyed back in the day, and I appreciate now perhaps more than ever how spoiled I was back then.

But uploading this fic has straight up become bad for my mental health because I'm stuck in a loop of getting excited when I post a chapter, followed by total disappointment when I get a single comment. To be clear, I have a few faithful reviewers/commenters, and I love you so much. You're the only reason I'm not just deleting the whole thing.

But this fic has gone from being my proudest work, to something that's taking up way too much space in my head in a negative way, and I don't like that. I'm supposed to be relaxing and recharging right now so I have a lot of energy for next semester, where I'm writing my master thesis. But I can't do that when my brain is just full of this fic.

SO. I'm going to pause uploading until I've buckled down and finished the last chapter and the epilogue. I hope it'll be done within the next two weeks.

And then I'm going to upload the entire thing over the course of a day or a few days. Still separated into chapters, for an easier reading experience, of course.

But Ive reached the point where I just want this to be over so I can be free from this cycle I've got myself stuck in. There's no reason for me to upload once a week over the course of the next six months, if it's just making me sad. I'd rather just release the whole thing so my few lovely readers can enjoy the entire thing and I can get out of the unhealthy loop I'm in.

I'm not writing this to be a downer - I don't blame anyone but myself, because I'm the one that's allowing it to take up this much space, and allowing the lack of engagement to hold so much power over me. Getting your beautiful and indepth reviews are like crack and it makes my day, and I hope that people will still feel compelled to leave reviews, even though I'm releasing the entire thing at once. I honestly want to cry that I've allowed things to get this bad for me and that's why I just want to be done with it.

Anyway. I love you all and stay tuned for the entire fic in a week or two I guess ❤️ I sincerely hope you'll enjoy reading it as much as I've loved writing it. Ive really rediscovered my love for writing and I have other ideas I'm going to pursue once this is done. Which is why I need it to be over