#how do you keep it contained

[irisseireth]

.

[art-is-kayos]

Bring an angel crashing down

I spent too much time on the wings to not show them uncovered by fire

[izzystizzys]

Echo’s world has gone decidedly… wobbly. Blurry. Fuzzy at the edges, and what-will-you-else. He can’t feel his fingertips, is his first thought. Kriffing overdid it on the glowing green shots, is his second.

“Holy kriff, Echo, that manhole-cover underneath you is moving!”, Fives exclaims, third. Or more like slurs into Lt. Jesse’s shoulder, who is himself moaning indistinctly into the Captain’s pauldron, who is in turn swaying back and forth gesturing at Commander Cody.

And it really is - the manhole cover, that is, once Echo stumbles off it with a shriek. Jumping up into the now open air with sudden force, steadying and then scraping across paveme-

“Are those kriffing hands?!”

In an instant, seven highly drunk pairs of fists and one blaster, courtesy of Commander Cody (the only one present who’s sober enough to be legally handling it) are aimed in a circle around the cover slowly being shuffled to the side, then the hands reaching up to palm at the edges of the hole -

- and are slowly being lowered again when two white-red painted helmets are heaved into view, along with chest-deep groaning and grunting. Two armored Corries collapse in a heap at Commander Cody’s feet, who stares down at them in open-mouthed shock.

Slowly, Echo blinks. Slowly, he raises a hand to snap his fingers in front of his face. No, still there. Slowly, Fives grabs for a piece of flank underneath his blacks and twists. Echo yelps, and slaps his hand away hard enough to hurt himself. “OI!”

“B’have, boys”, Captain Rex makes a brave attempt to slur out as he sways on his feet, still staring down at the trembling heap of armor at their feet. Whoa, Echo didn’t know they had those kinds of funky armor designs in the Guard. Very avant-garde.

“That’s blood, Ey’ika”, says Appo.

Oh.

Slowly, Hardcase raises his right foot, inching towards-

“Don’t even think about it”, Commander Cody snaps, and Hardcase’s foot whips back to the ground next to its companion. Fives chortles. “Yeah, genius, those are Commander kamas - they’d put you down in a second flat!”

“Why would two Corrie Commanders go crawling out of holes in front of 79’s, huh, genius?!”, Hardcase retorts, somewhat justly, Echo feels. Next to him, Commander Cody frowns, and kneels carefully. “Good question, trooper. Fox, can you hear me? Fox’i-“

Which is when one of the bodies - Commander Fox, Echo realizes with a shudder, The Marshall Commander Fox - convulses on the ground, and an arm rears up to nail Cody face-first with the back of a hand, sending him sprawling back into the pavement with an undignified squawk.

“Thorn”, the sad figure that is the highest decorated clone in existence groans, still faceplanted into pavement, “Thorn, I’m hallucinating Cody. Thorn, tell him to shut up.”

“Shuddup”, Commander Thorn heaves, loyally. Cody makes an affronted noise, braced back on his shebs. “Sdubid Codeh.”

Commander Fox’s visor scrapes against the ground with his nod, a sound that sends the surrounding vod’e cringing. “Yeah, you go, Thorn. You’re my favorite.” A considering pause. “Oh, kark. I need to call in medevac - Fox to Stabby, Fox to Stabby - the kriffing Narglatches are back on the lower levels.”

The Commander’s comm crackles to life, as he heaves himself over with a punched-out moan - oh, yup, that dark patch’s definitely not paint, and are those teeth marks?! On plastoid??

“I’m going to wring Senator Hliii’s neck, and then I’m going to twist him into a human kriffing meat-lasso to catch every last one of his little pets with”, sounds through Fox’s comm, who just hacks out a laughcough in response. “Pinging your location now. Where’s Thorn?”

“Pr’snt”, slurs Thorn.

“Concussed”, adds Fox, “We crawled out forty levels to behind 79’s, so no one would see us.”

Awkward silence follows.

“Uh, about that”, begins Rex, only to be interrupted by a deep groan from Fox.

“Oh, you’ve got to be kriffing kidding me! As if Cody’s ugly mug wasn’t - WHAT THE KRIFF ARE YOUR KRIFFING ARC KARKHEADS DOING IN MY HALLUCINATION, REX?!”

“Shuddup, Rex”, Thorn moans bravely.

[screechingfromthevoid]

nothing (besides everyone ignoring Orym's deal) has made me angrier than watching Dorian keep up this facade. Dorian Storm has always been a type of mask he's worn. At first he called himself a liar because of it. The happy go lucky bard was a way of escaping for him. He was escaping Brontë so he created Dorian. He didn't believe he was Dorian. Until the Crown Keepers made Dorian real. And for a while, he really believed he was Dorian. That he has this new family and new life and he could be who he truly wanted to be.

And then his brother came back and made his problems Dorian's problems. Until he had to put Brontë back on. Because even if the Crown Keepers + Cyrus called him Dorian, he was Brontë. He had to be who his brother thought he was.

When Cyrus dies, the thread to Brontë had snapped. He was going to see Orym, back to the Bells Hells, back to Dorian Storm. But the foundation of Dorian had shattered. Dorian was created in order to run from his place in life, family, Cyrus. Now he was gone. The Crown Keepers had fallen apart. His friends fell through his fingers and he couldn't do anything to stop it. He was once ready to side with a betrayer god for these people and now they're in the wind.

So Dorian shows back up to Bells Hella and he's completely broken. The foundation of both of his lives has been thoroughly rocked. No brother. No Crown Keepers. The two things that forged Dorian Storm. He wears that mask so fucking well. Because he still wants to believe in it. He said it live on stage that he should "believe his own backstory". The one he made up. The one where he was a bard.

He wants to be Dorian so bad. He spends all his money on Orym, he spins the bottle so he can kiss his friends, he flirts, he blushes and giggles at compliments. Exactly how Dorian would, should.

But he wears the gold of the heir. He has a festering animosity inside his chest. He doesn't sleep. He's thinner than he was. He doesn't sleep. He sicks abominations after their creators. He talks to God's without an ounce of self preservation, daring them to strike him down. He does not acknowledge them as they taunt him.

The god of beauty and magic calls him beautiful and he does not smile.

[tempestmothstorm]

Ok since Monika still has her admin powers in the side stories you think she could just discover them accidentally or use them without realizing

Anyways au where Monika and friends discover her admin powers but dont know about the wider context of what it means. So they just go around thinking Monika has magic and try practicing with a bunch of silly fun shenanigans because they figure it’s some chosen one bloodline stuff and not like. A product of their reality being a constricted digital science experiment.

This au will not end well

[the-gayest-sky-kid]

i like it when people give 15 femzai a bobcut because it makes it so much funnier that mori flopped twice... like how???? do you keep doing this

"if i had a nickel for every protégé with a bob ive failed id have two nickels. which isnt much but its weird that it happened twice"

[puppyeared]

sketches for sleight's van, the Magicmobile ^_^

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

Anyone else have near-perfect executive function at work; but at home, have literally no energy or motivation to do anything except lie in a dark room, with something in or on your ears for several hours?

[nostalgia-tblr]

What do English people call a close? You know, the stairwell bit where all the flats are in a tenement? If you go to visit someone at their flat, what do you call the bit where you wait for them to answer their door? That communal stairs… area?

("Modern AUs don't require research" MAYBE IF YOU'RE ENGLISH THEY DON'T 😭)

[scoriarose]

Sometimes baby girl will have her tail loop and fold in a way that looks uncomfortable, and she always seems to appreciate me adjusting her coils to a more comfortable position- it's one of the odd little ways we bond. She could adjust it herself, sure, but she has come to enjoy me babying her and doting on her- and if it makes both of us happy what's the harm?

Anyway, Scoria had folded her tail over in a way that looked uncomfortable and I gently moved it with my finger from beneath the ball she was relaxing in, and then lifted my finger through the coil so she had a more relaxed loop. I was going to remove my finger but she gently held on to me, she wanted my finger to stay.

I know to many it will seem insignificant, but experiencing this small gesture makes me so happy. She wanted me to stay. She enjoys me being with her, and I'm not bothering her fussing over her. It's just, so many times as a pet care taker you wonder if your pet is happy, if they also love you and want you near. My little girl tells me every day, I love you, stay with me. And for a moment it was her turn to hold me. After a good snuggle of my finger for several minutes she changed her position but still loosely held it and snuggled me.

Sometimes the smallest gestures can mean so very much.

[cryolyst]

~

[crystalflygeo]

jhgfcdvgbhnjk but here's a lil thought to chuckle over, but imagine accidentally introducing li to the whole 'daddy kink' shebang when you accidentally call him that. cue him looking increasingly confused because??? did he??? misread the relationship??? ( he is confusion and panicking and questioning is existence, your honor ).

now you have to spend the next few minutes telling him that no, no this was a strictly sexytimes thing, li stop developing a crisis pls.

NO BUT LIKE THIS IS SO FUNNY SCGVASHVCJHANJK-

So like fun fact I don’t really like daddy kink, I don’t. It makes me kinda uncomfy idk why?? But when the fandom started calling Zhongli “geo daddy” from the start I jumped right in since it was funny, like it’s just a joke, right? fast forward 2 years and I can unironically call zl that what is life this man can get me into any kink is2g it has happened multiple times already //head in hands but I still very much treat it as a joke/tease?? It still gives me asdcvghbjk vibes personally?? ( I much MUCH prefer sir/lord/master ehe//SHOT) Zhongli is the exception anyway

Zhongli has you pressed on the couch, lips claiming yours passionately as you groan and try to pull him impossibly closer. Your hands finding purchase on his dark locks, your legs parting to make way for him, before rubbing one of them sensually against his side and around his hip.

His breath hitches as the heavy kiss stops for a moment. It's certainly starting to feel hot and you want all those layers off.

Your hands fumble with the intricate clasps of Zhongli's coat while his hot breath tickles at your neck. He nibbles and sucks there, effectively making harder your goal of getting his coat off, you huff frustrated.

Zhongli chuckles and pulls back a moment to discard the article of clothing himself, draping it over the back of the couch, before leaning back to pepper you with kisses and nibbles. His pelvis rubs against yours with a slow drag and you let out a breathy moan at the feel of his sizeable bulge.

"Ah! P-Please... daddy..."

The word slips out without even noticing, but what you do notice is how Zhongli stills on top of you, petrified for a few seconds.

Oh.

Oh no...

Your eyes widen a little and you blush profusely as you stare at his equally shocked expression. You really haven't talked about this, or even mentioned it before, maybe he finds it odd or uncomfortable?

He pulls back again and you barely contain a frustrated whine. Your legs still parted around his lap, splayed enticingly on the couch when in reality you wish you could just curl up into a ball, embarrassed.

"I'm- I'm sorry it just came out, I-"

"Do you... see me as a father figure, y/n?"

You almost choke.

"W-What?!"

"I'm" He coughs into his fist, a pink dust over his cheeks. "I know I'm... far older than you but..."

Oh this is not happening.

You just lie there, mouth agape, incredulous while looking at him stumble over his words.

"Have I... been misreading our relationship and your affection for me?"

He looks straight up distraught and you're not sure if you want to cry or laugh.

"Stop- No. Li." You scramble to sit up. "Listen, it's... i-it's a kink thing..." You explain, feelings your cheeks heat up.

"... an... incestuous fetish?"

You want to die.

"Zhongli!" You squeak mortified. "NO! Nothing like that, sweet Celestia!" You drag a hand down your face. Great, now both of you are looking really uncomfortable, the mood has been killed, and you actually have to explain a daddy kink to this 6000 years old God.

“I’m just not sure-”

You sputter and frantically move your hands in front of him. "Alright just- stop, stop- stop talking. Before my face gets any redder and this gets any weirder. I-I'm sorry I blurted out that one on you, alright? Now..." You inhale, oh boy here it goes. "It's... kind of a dominance thing. I like t-that you're... older, and stronger." You try to word out carefully. "So you take care of me, of my needs, and you protect me." You mumble. "S-so you're my daddy, I'm your baby. It's exciting."

He... doesn't look very convinced.

You huff.

"Alright, you know how I like it when you call me little one? When you use pet names and tell me I'm good? It's sort of like that... it's dirty talk." You bite your lip, shuffling on the couch a little restless.

Zhongli looks pensive now, a hand to his chin and his brows frowning cutely as he usually does when considering things.

Is he still overthinking things? You sigh and your shoulders and head sag in defeat.

"You know what? Please, just forget about it don't start having an existential cris-"

His hand then tips your chin up and he leans in to whisper at your ear, voice deep and velvet smooth.

"So, you want daddy to take care of you, baby?"

A shiver goes down your spine.

He pulls back and stares at you with a mix of amusement and wonder. Seemingly fascinated and proud of having gotten such a strong reaction as your entire face flushes red and you stare at him speechless.

He chuckles good-naturedly. “Like that?”

Now that's just not fair...

"Y-You can't just...!"

"Oh? Was that not-"

"Do it again."

[antirepurp]

if you think amy's gameplay in sonic advance 1 sucks you're weak. you're a fake gamer who cannot appreciate a variance in the base gameplay that is surprisingly satisfying to master. advance 1 amy rocks and that is an objective truth

[thewritehag]

And now, a PSA about summoning the fae from our Gay Auntie on tiktok

[feykrorovaan]

Dear ZoS,

Can you please make the drop rate for antiquities go up after the initial discovery? I have been in Moonlit Cove for four days. I have had nothing for sustenance except for what little supplies I have found in barrels and sacks. The only water sources are either saltwater or skooma.When I close my eyes, I dream of deranged pirates and Moon-kissed jellies. I miss my family and friends. I long for the feel of the sun on my face. Please. I just want my lead and to go home.

Sincerely,

The Vestige.

P.s don't give me that nonsense about the drop rate depending on the quality of the lead. I have like, 16 of those Echoes of Aldmeris paintings and ten music boxes.

I'm at the point where I would just break down and spend the 75k on it, but I can't because I haven't discovered the lead three times.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

[dorkicon]

bitching abt my job again

tags contain frank mentions of transphobia and homophobia