#how do u rap lol )
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#every once in a while ill go back after cleaning up music on my phone and relisten to old rock songs then redownload them#but im thinking. how the fuck did 3/4 of my immediate family listen to disturbed. just one song but huh#actually maybe 2.. also trapt? who the hell is that anyway we all just know headstrong 😭#i redownload and delete and redownload it all the time LMAO#skilet and three days grace and OH breaking benjamin we all listened to a lot too#and i say 3/4 bc i dont know what the fuck my dad likes? pit..bull..? lmfao..? thai music?? im so confused#FALL OUT BOY ALWAYS HITS#also that fucking. roach last resort shit. my brother still has it in his spotify playlist and it always makes me laugh so fucking hard#anyway i do rmr skillet and breaking benjamin being big bc we all liked it. also how did we all like disturbed but now none of them listen#to rock sob sob#also i used to share three days grace and fucking hollywood undead to my younger cousin??? what was wrong w me for sharing HU...#HE DOESNT REMEMBER IT THO?? its really funny LMAO#also evanescence but i found more songs on my own and ofc we together only kinda had uhh 2 songs#NUMB ENCORE.. I TOTALLY FORGET ABT IT AND IT BLOWS MY MIND EVERYTIME IT RESURFACES IN MY HEAD HOLY SHIT#BANGER but anyw my point was uhh smn smn sharing music is great and im happy we all bonded over rock before lol#44597#IDK I FORGOT HALF WAY IN 😭 GO ROCK!! im redownloading some of the shit i dont have again LMAO#OUGH ALSO NOBODY CARES BUT ME AND MY COUSIN R SO 06 ALL HAIL SHADOW PILLED#THAT WHEN MY BROTHER PLAYED THE OG ALL HAIL SHADOW I KID U NOT I WAS LIKE IS THAT A COVER WHAT VERS IS THIS#SORRY IM SO CRUSH40 PILLED I LITERALLY PLAYED SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG ON THE PS2 AND ON AN EMULATOR?? WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT#/LH BC ITS STILL GOOD BUT THAT IS NOT MY JAM. 06 IS WHERE ITS AT#crush40 was so good for sonic songs though esp all hail shadow and ungravitify OUGH crush40 versions r like almost always my fav#wait with movie and year of shadow ppl r going back n commenting all over this old yt upload of all of me from 11 years ago LMAOOO#dude they have to give knuckles kickass rap songs again PLEASE unknown from M.E makes me laugh so hard BUT ITS NOT BAD#AND PUMPKIN HILL ok that wasnt tehcnically his but it literally TALKS ABT KNUCKLES. ITS LITERALLY ABT HIM BRO#that ones funny to me bc my cousin loved it sm and he was legit like trying to hear the lyrics but he couldnntt#a ghost tried to approach me AND GOT MARRIED??? 🤨🤨 i cant take this song seriously ASLKDJS#CHECK YES JULIET.. JUST REALIZED MY BESTIES USED TO LIKE SOFT ROCK WITH ME?? they dont listen to that at all anymore omg
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I definitely will not get back into kpop ever but occasionally I'll go through a youtube binge of my old faves. I only ever liked female artists but the thing was you'd get attached to a girl group or a female vocalist and like a year later it would be like "no she's too old now. time to abandon her and introduce a new group of 15 year olds" . they continually wasted so much incredible talent by viewing the artists as well as talent itself as a replaceable commodity imo (i'm not saying this doesnt happen in western pop too but perhaps not so brazenly)
anyway a lot of it is bad lol but these are some of the things that I've revisited that still actually go so hard:
4minute crazy- excuse me?? this was such a slay. also hate. the tonal plot twist in this track: unparalleled. hyuna was iconic but also jiyoon !!! i agree w the comments of this yt video this would absolutely be a massive hit if it was released today
ladies code. this is just legitimately good pop music. a very sad story behind them as well and they were very undervalued as I recall. but this. galaxy was spectacular. both of the last two EPs tbh. that vocalist's voice does things to me
f(x) 4walls. should have been an international dance hit tbh
wonder girls obviously. even as far back as irony which is so charming in a retro way but I love that they eventually were playing their own instruments/having more of a hand in their own music. specifically i want to point out that park ye-eun from wonder girls was legitimately SUCH a talented musician imo (as a singer and a composer) and so much of her solo stuff as ha:tfelt was incredible. I was very glad to hear that she (and the others i think) left their agency bc they were so mistreated rip
yezi cider.... god she was so talented and i was so in love with her. my underrated fave... at one point i watched a whole reality show about korean female rappers for her lol (which was. a lot. but she should have won)
suzy yes no maybe again this was just really good pop.
dalshabet someone like u this is the corniest thing i'll put on this list but mostly it's just a super interesting case to me. iirc it was fairly popular with international audiences but kind of a flop in korea. which is fascinating to think about in terms of the cultural differences in what music appeals to us. like as a cheesy pop song it is just so catchy to me lol and I can't understand how it could not be but there u go
in capable/caring hands so many of these women could have done INCREDIBLE things imo. like it's undeniable that there is very real talent in kpop, I think the aggressively commercial aspect just limits the artists criminally and it's a shame. which ig is true to some extent about any pop music.
anyway i've put two of my kpop playlists that were popular on 8tracks on spotify: here and here
#im speaking in the past tense but im sure a lot of them are still doing stuff that is perhaps good i have no idea tho#4minute were ahead of their time and their stuffs aged SO well too like i was watching live performances of crazy and they're iconic#there were some soloists/k-indie artists that were good too. like neon bunny#4minute#ladies code#this isnt even touching the other suspect aspects of kpop. like idk what to tell u about the feeling of watching a girl group performance#and the audience is just men bellowing incoherently.... ugh#ha:tfelt#ha:tfelt was my fave and truth is incredible song any way u look at it#another thing i think is that their insistence on following a specific formula was limiting. like not EVERY song needs a rap part lol#unless ur 4minute in which case thats the main thing it needs#but it ws so funny how youd get an incredibly twee little girlish pop track with a random rap part in the middle of it#i didn't mention red velvet here but i also loved them
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#hehe I really do wanna go through all their songs and lyrically pick out the ones that talk abt happiness but I was like damn that's a lot#Of songs and i don't wanna miss one so I decided to do this tierlist to kinda have that list in front of me LOL#I only put songs here that I felt like I listened to enough to rank so it's not their whole discography#(Like i need more time for sungjins album to marinate before making actual decisions abt it)#also to be continued by denimalz wasn't on this tierlist and thats genuinely like skdjdj a+/s tier song for me its so fucking gooood#it was hard chz I like diff songs for diff reasons some r more strong lyrically others musically some r so good at both it's so hard#kept changing my mind lol and feel like it could change depending on my mood#letting go reboot F tier only cuz I feel very 'looking at how they massacred my child' abt it#letting go is like the first d6 song I liked even b4 I stanned them and to this day I feel like it does so much so well I nvr understood wh#the reboot version 😭😭 i do like the new bridge but I also really really like youngks rap bridge 😔😔#just felt like all the correct musical decisions were taken out in the reboot ahh like there was so much like#song starts bare ish but then u start layering instruments it helps build it up to the climax so well but they take all of that out w the#reboot 😭😭#anyhows. now that i have a list i will do what I intended to do and compile the songs that talk abt happiness in some way or another#certain songs also surprised me for how high I put em like what is.. for instance#also ONE ?? I didn't know i felt S tier abt it lol but I guess I do.#rambles
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ten years in the making
paring: bakugou katsuki x fem reader
warnings: smut, non-con/dub-con, no-quirks au, high school love confession, unrequited love turned very requited, almost non-con threesome, feels like cheating (but technically not), no cheating though, fuck boi bakugou, pining reader, obsessive/possessive bakugou, running away, biting, marking, creampie, breeding kink, angst, toxic relationship
word count: 6.2k
You still had the love letter you handed to him when you were both in high school. His spiky blonde hair was pretty under the spring sun, red eyes examining the envelope in your hands with a disgusted look on his face.
On the rooftop of the school building, the wind blew extra hard. The chill of winter that lingered in the breeze made your face cold, but it was the rejection from Katsuki that numbed your whole body.
“Take that shit away,” he sneered. “Be lame somewhere else. I don’t like you.”
It was pathetic how you fixated on him because he helped you once from a petty thief who tried to steal your wallet. You shouldn’t have liked him that much, not when he was so clear in his stance on how he felt about you. But you were also just a girl, and girls had crushes on Bakugou Katsuki—you were just one of many, but no doubt the most pathetic one.
Cause while others grew out of their crushes eventually, you did not. And Katsuki, being the spawn of the devil that he was, started to see you as some sort of entertainment.
You followed him through university, enrolling in the same one. You begged your mom to stay at a dorm near campus, the same dorm Katsuki told you he would stay in. He lied. You knew on the moving day because he texted you photos of his new place from the front of the building to the room with an obviously different layout.
The text said, ‘lol you really thought u got me huh?’
That sentence needed commas, and you… needed to get a grip. Yet, you did not.
Still trying to be close to him, you went to every party he went to, even if it meant you had to see him with a different woman each time. He never stuck with one, telling you he was easily bored and that was why you and him would never happen. Because you were a soppy, hopeless romantic who would wait for him like a dog waiting for its owner to come home—his words.
“When will it get through your thick skull, dog?” Katsuki rapped on your forehead with his knuckles. “You’re not my type.”
Well, his type exited the room just now, leaving only you and a very naked Katsuki in it. He loomed over you menacingly close, trying once again to talk some sense into you, albeit in a very mean fashion. Tonight, he was particularly cruel. After texting you to buy him a box of condoms—stating a specific brand, flavor, and size—he made you sit and watch until the very end.
You pretended to pay attention, but what you really looked at was the wall behind the scene playing in front of you.
“I’ll pick you up tomorrow at ten.” You changed the subject, ignoring his hot breath that fanned over your face.
“Yeah, mom misses you like hell,” he jeered. “How did you do it, inserting yourself into my family?”
It was simple, actually, just offering to drive him home for a monthly family visit with a gift for his mom and dad every time, without fail, even though he got his own car. His mom, Mitsuki, never trusted his driving skills anyway, saying he was too reckless. So she was grateful for you, to the point of inviting you over for dinner as thanks whenever you dropped her son home, and you accepted the kindness.
Katsuki would roll his eyes, but he let it all happen, cause why would he say no to a personal chauffeur? All he had to do was sit prettily and blast his one-hour playlist until the car was parked in front of his childhood abode. And after eating and helping with the dishes, you would be gone, back to your own family house a couple of streets away—convenient.
You knew you were just a tool to Katsuki, his lackey, but you were also as stubborn as a mule.
And as dumb as a clown…
After many years hounding for Katsuki’s attention, you finally got it when you were both twenty five. The first time he kissed you, he was drunk in your apartment. He was frustrated with a colleague who screwed up an important meeting with a potential client and decided to come rant your ears off with two packs of beer—one for him, one for you.
You never thought the night would end up with him pinning you to the floor, his mouth devouring yours and his hands popping the buttons of your work shirt until your bra-clad tits showed.
“Thought you would follow me anywhere,” said Katsuki, red eyes locked onto you from where he was, face nestled between the soft mounds of your breasts. “But you chose a different company, live far away from me, texting seven times in seven months. Traitor.”
“You’re heavy.” Your words struggled to come out. From when he used to be lanky and the same height as you, he was none of that now. The growth spurt hit him like a freight train. In the blink of an eye, he grew into a giant of a man, tall and filled with muscles, even more so now that he was in his salaryman era. You wondered how he still found time to work out as often as he did when you barely caught any sleep.
After graduation, you both landed jobs in different companies. And if you were being honest with yourself, you would say the reason you accepted the offer was partly because running after Katsuki and answering his every beck and call started to… tire you. Forced by duty and responsibility, it helped you distance yourself away from him. Cause Lord, you doubted you could have done it on your own.
Getting his text today saying he would come visit, you were dumbfounded, even thinking it was a joke til you got another text an hour later saying he arrived.
You shouldn’t have let him in, shouldn’t have reconnected. You were almost off the noose before he came and adjusted the knot, tightening it. After that night, he came visit once a week on Friday. Kisses slowly evolved into soft touches, then heavy petting, and finally—sex.
Fucking your brain out, that was what he did most of the times, leaving your ass red and face wet from crying. On rare occasions, it was slow, deep, like he wanted to mold you into the shape of his cock. But all was intense, asking for eye contact and name-saying, and it was Katsuki who did the asking, which surprised you to no end.
“You wanna come home? Mom and dad miss you,” mumbled Katsuki one autumn night. It had been three months since that first drunken kiss. “They got a new dog. But old people are always lonely, hell knows why.”
With that, not only him, but the monthly visit returned, too.
Their dog was a loudmouthed chihuahua named Katsumi. It barked at you non-stop from the moment you got out of the car, louder when Mitsuki raced out the front door to hug you. After dinner, it found you and Katsuki in the laundry room with its master’s teeth nibbling down your neck and barked snappily, making Katsuki jump.
When you let out a roar of laughter, his eyes widened with a look of what seemed like wonder. His pupils dilated when he leaned down to take your lips in a fierce kiss. For a moment, everything was perfect.
Had you mentioned being dumb?
A month later, there was a knock on your door. Katsuki hips slowed down mid-pounding before he stepped back from you and the bed, leaving you empty.
“Keep your ass up. Don’t fucking move.”
You only let out a soft hum as a response, not understanding why or who would be here at this hour. Were you too loud? Maybe someone was here to complain. You pondered, face still down against the soft mattress with your rear up as instructed. Katsuki would handle them, whoever they were.
“Well, I see why you never call anymore, Katsuki-kun.”
The voice was close, too close—its owner was in the bedroom with you. When the realization hit, you bolted, shooting out of your position and scooting back, all the while pulling the duvet up to shield your nakedness from the newcomer’s eyes.
She was a woman about your age and height, standing at the foot of the bed in a skimpy dress.
“Do me a favor. Shut the fuck up,” said Katsuki, confirming they really did know each other.
It was like your brain stopped functioning. You saw Katsuki walking towards you but was too slow to think what your next move should be. So you let him pull you to him by the duvet because you wouldn’t let go of it. When he sat you on his lap, you felt something wet gliding down your cheeks.
“Hush now, princess.” He wiped the dripping drops with both of his thumbs. “You seriously thought our relationship was exclusive? You thought you fixed me?”
Another set of fat tears cascaded down when he kissed you, seasoning the kiss salty.
“Seven months, seven texts, no calls,” he said. “Who do you think you fucking are, leaving me like that?”
You knew, you knew it was too good to be true. And when he turned to the other side to kiss the woman who was now naked and sitting on the bed—your bed–beside him, you also knew it was time to let go. The silly crush, the well-kept love letter, the admiration that you should have weaned off long ago—they all needed to go.
Getting up from his lap while he was distracted, you gathered your clothes off the floor and left the bedroom without turning back. You got dressed in the living room and closed the front door silently when you left the apartment. You didn’t want him to hear, not wanting to cause a scene, not wanting to see him anymore.
You were sitting in the car in the apartment parking lot, trying to find a hotel to crash at when you got a text from Katsuki.
‘you thought you got me huh?’
You blocked him.
There was only a month left on your apartment’s lease; you would give a notice to your landlord tomorrow that you would move. Everything would be alright, you told yourself. Katsuki might never bother you anymore since he had got what he wanted—your absolute humiliation.
It was different from that one time he told you to stay and watch him rail the life out of that girl when you were in college. At that time, you knew you were nothing to him, knew he did that to hurt you. This time, you thought you were something to him. And it hurt, a thousand times worse to realize that you weren’t, and that he still wanted to hurt you.
—
Shit, shit, shit, shit. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Those were the only words spinning around in his head since you were gone, really gone. You walked out of that door so fucking demurely. Even when he stopped kissing his ex-booty call to listen, he didn’t hear you wail or see you come crawling back.
So he texted, leaving the girl he called here to demean you to quickly type on his phone. When the message was marked ‘read’ but got no response, he cursed, “Fuck!”
“Come on, Katsuki-kun. Let’s have some fun,” the girl whined.
“Sh!” He shushed her, still tapping the screen.
She probably looked at him like he was possessed by an evil spirit, but he couldn’t care less.
‘Who did you think you were? My gf? Lol.’
He was so in a hurry he forgot to type in lowercase.
‘Lovesick foll’
‘*fool’
‘Where u going’
‘Dont wanna watch’
‘?’
You didn’t read at all except for the first text. That made him get off the bed and get dressed, running out of the apartment to punch the elevator down to the first floor. When he exited the building, your sedan was already on the street; he saw the taillights, remembered the plate. It got farther in each second that passed, and there was not a darn thing he could do about it.
Fuck, shit, fuck, shit, fuck shit, fucking fuck.
For some reason he knew, this time, you were gone for good. Not an absence the next day at school after he told you he lost his virginity to some girl in another class, not the seven months with a few texts to check in with him. This time, it was for good.
Like hell he was gonna let that happen.
—
You ended up staying at the hotel for a week, scared Katsuki might still be lurking around. While you knew he got his biggest fill of breaking you this time, you wanted to be sure. Then, as soon as you found a new place, you moved out.
At work, you asked your boss, Aizawa, for a transfer to another branch, telling him it was for personal reasons. You swore you saw him squint his weary eyes, but after asking you a couple more questions, he agreed nonetheless.
“If it were stress, it’d be no different in another branch. Hope you know that,” Aizawa drawled.
“I do, sir,” you replied, tired from the poor quality of sleep your situation and the hotel bed gave you.
“And as soon as possible, you say?”
“Yes, sir,” you affirmed. “Please.”
The transfer was done in one week, all thanks to your boss.
Restarting your mundane life, it took two months for you to regain some sort of peace found in everyday’s routine—waking up, going to work, coming home, sleeping, waking up again. There was no contact from Katsuki, only the ghost of his taunts that came hand in hand with the memories of his caresses you could not dispel remained, making guilt creep up your spine every time you touched yourself to climax imagining it was his hand.
You would find someone else. You and Katsuki, it was ten years in the making. You were fifteen years old on that rooftop, confessing to a boy you thought was the most beautiful person in the world, having no clue how your action would play out. It would not be possible to banish those ten years in two months, no matter how despicable he was to you. And that was a shame.
It took one phone call from Mitsuki to disrupt your normalcy.
“I just wanted to know how you were doing, honey.” said Katsuki’s mom, sounding worried. “It’s just—you’re gone again, like those months. And Katsuki won’t tell me what’s going on, which means something must have happened. I need to—I—”
She was trying to find words, and you didn’t want to interrupt.
“I need to know you’re okay.” She finally let it out. “Just come visit, honey. You don’t have to bring my son.”
“We miss you.”
It was those words that brought you to the Bakugou house the following weekend.
“Oh, honey.” Misuki stopped before you, eyeing you from head to toe. Katsumi barked incessantly, all the while trying to sniff the bag of fresh-baked cookies you bought for the family. When the woman beckoned you to come close and enfolded you in her arms, you teared up a bit.
“That airhead of a son,” the older woman grumbled.
Getting in the house thwarted all the cold delightfully. You put your coat on the couch next to where you sat, waiting for the tea Mitsuki said she was going to get. You always liked the Bakugou house, asking Katsuki to walk him home every day just to see it from the outside. He never let you in. Ironically enough, it was never him who invited you in, it was his mom.
Where was Mitsuki now? You looked around for the matriarch, but instead, you saw Katsuki.
“About time you showed up.”
There was so much fighting, so much push and pull, and trying to run away, and crying for help; yet, no one came. Katsuki had to carry you on his shoulder to go upstairs because you resisted profusely and refused to walk on your own.
Door closed, lock clicked. A second later, you were dropped on his bed unceremoniously. You had never been in his room before and didn’t want to now. But since there was no choice, you took the opportunity to look around, taking everything in.
His room was so… boy. A drum set in one corner, an expensive-looking gaming PC in another with a shelf filled with mangas and action figures next to it, posters of his favorite anime character plastering all over the walls.
You remembered he liked All Might, the blonde-haired hero from a shonen manga you didn’t read but knew every detail from Katsuki’s ceaseless babble. You even broke into your savings buying a dozen raffle tickets till you won the big prize—a large figure he said he was saving up for—and gave it to him as a birthday present.
He probably didn’t keep it.
“Don’t be mad at mom, okay? I was on my knees begging her for help. That was on me,” Katsuki spoke softly, as if he was trying not to spook you. “Old hag hit me so hard dad had to intervene. But I’m her son. You understand, right? She would never abandon me.”
It was him between you and the door; you just needed to get past him, unlock the door and run. Slowly, you got out of the bed to stand on your own feet. The moment they touched the floor, however, was brief. Because Katsuki leaped from where he stood, taking him only two strides before he got you again.
Back on the bed, you fought him tooth and nail, punching, kicking, biting, while he tried to sedate you with a soothing voice. But there was nothing soothing or gentle about this man—a monster. You saw through him.
His grip on your wrists was immovable, anchoring you to the bed with one hand. He caged your body with his, examining you like a predator sizing up its prey, his presence all domineering, demanding obedience.
“Shhh, settle down. I’m not gonna hurt you,” he coaxed.
“Let me go!”
All you could move now was your legs, which you did to your best ability, but to no avail. Katsuki waited it out, allowing you to try however you want to get away without saying anything. Eventually, you stilled, so exhausted you couldn't move anymore.
“There, there. That’s my good princess,” he murmured, his usual harsh features softening.
Frustration brought tears to your eyes. It took less than you thought, easier than expected, to suck it all up and spill everything that occupied your mind.
“What do you want? What do you want from me, Katsuki? I'm sorry I confessed to you that day. It was pathetic. I was pathetic. But please—please.” Your voice got hoarse and lost at the second please. You had to cough to get it back. “I have learned my lesson. You and me, it will never happen—will never work out. I know that now. I get it, believe me, I do,” you choked through your tears, pleading. “I won't like you anymore, Katsuki, so please—let me go.”
“Like me?” he reiterated. “I thought you loved me.”
“What?”
He sighed, his free hand searching for something in one of his sweatpants’ pockets. When he pulled his hand out, you saw a letter—the one you gave it to him and got rejected. All these years, it had been kept with you, safely in your trinket box. Now, it was in his hand, opened. He finally accepted it, but at what cost?
“I need you to read it to me,” he commanded, “out loud.”
“Please, don’t make me do this.”
“Listen,” he said. “I’m going to let go of your wrists and give you this letter that you wrote for me, and you’re going to read it—word—for—word.” He used the envelope to brush down the bridge of your nose. “If you tear it up—if you do, princess—I’m going to make you rewrite it. And it better be as good, if not better, than this one.”
He let go of your wrists and gave you the letter.
“Oh, and if you run,” he added. “I’ll catch you, and we start over. Clear?”
You nodded and took the envelope, hands shaking noticeably when you took the letter out. Everything was under Katsuki’s observation. He sat astride your thighs without putting all his weight on you, waiting patiently.
“To Katsuki, if you are reading this, that means you accepted my letter, thank you!” You wiped tears out of your eyes to see better. “I know you get a lot of letters like this. It must be a bit of a hassle reading love confessions everyday, right? But please bear with me, I will try to keep this—”
Interrupted, you looked past the letter and saw Katsuki lifting the hem of your sweater up and leaning down to place a kiss on your exposed stomach.
“Go on,” he prompted. “Don’t mind me. Don’t stop.”
“I will try to keep this short,” you continued, completing the last sentence, trying to ignore the fact that your jeans were being unbuttoned and pulled down. “You know, girls in our class often say they love your hair, your eyes, but a lot of them are scared of your personality.” You felt his breath through your panties, hot. “I disagree. I think you are nice, brave, and kind. And don’t get me wrong, I love your hair and eyes too.”
“You’re cute, baby,” said Katsuki as he pried your legs open. Without taking off the underwear, he licked your pussy through it.
“Katsuki!”
Dragging his tongue up, he mumbled, “Keep reading.”
“And I love you.” You read on and saw his eyes roll back at that specific sentence.
Suddenly, he switched from licking to sucking, making the crotch all wet with his saliva. You were preparing to read the next part when he made it all the more difficult by moving aside the damp fabric and rubbing his face into your naked cunt. His nose, lips, chin, all soaked in your embarrassing glossy juice. You cursed yourself for giving in, for getting wet.
“Did I tell you to stop?”
You let out a sob, raising the letter in your hands up again to read.
“I know we don’t know each other well, and this feeling is not reciprocated—”
Why did he have to slurp the juice like that? He made it hard, so hard for you.
“I’m—just a classmate after—all. But what I said, I said it with—a sincere—heart. So even if—you don’t love me back, please—let me keep—this feeling, I promise I—will treasure it.”
Panting sharply, you stopped before the next paragraph when you felt his tongue massaging your clit. Grasping his hair with both of your hands, you forgot you still held the letter. There was an audible scrunch when it was crumpled up in one of your fists.
Katsuki stopped dead in his tracks, glaring up from below; his red orbs seemed redder all of a sudden. “Did you just crumple the letter?”
You pulled your hands back quickly when you realized, strengthening out the paper as best as you could. The creases weren’t that bad. You showed it to him, ensuring that it was still intact.
He relaxed. You released a held breath.
Back to concentrating on the handwritten texts, this time, you vowed to not look at him anymore and would just just read through everything as fast as you could—getting it done. Nevertheless, when he was back on eating your pussy and pride out, it did not get easier, Katsuki still managed to make you writhe like your life depended on it.
“One more thing, I don’t know if you remember, but thank you for—saving me that day in front of the mini mart.” You tried to recall the event, the beginning of everything. “The thief would have—hurt me, and I would have lost—my wallet.”
And it was just that, just you trying to yank your wallet back from the thief's hands, the popsicle you just bought lying on the ground, melting. The store staff was on the phone with the police—you heard it—but they didn’t come out. Katsuki did.
When the thief was about to lay his hand on you, the blonde haired boy whom you recognized as your classmate kicked him in the shin. Moving fast, Katsuki then slammed his school backpack on the thief’s head, once, twice, thrice, on and on until he knocked him out.
“You were my hero.” You read the last sentence, finishing the letter as he finished you.
You set the paper down on your side, finally freed from the evidence of your teenage self’s stupidity. Feeling weightless from the orgasm, all you could do was stare at the ceiling. After what felt like forever, Katsuki appeared in your field of vision, hovering over you, now shirtless… and pantless. You weren’t aware when he took them off, too lost in your own world.
“You can't just stop loving me,” he said before bending down to kiss your cheek, then whispered, “Take responsibility. Be true to your words, dumbass.”
“Katsuki, you’re being selfish.” You turned your face away, fleeing him.
His red eyes sharpened. “After all this time you have showered me with love and attention, and you want to—take it away?”
“There will be others who love you and give you all the attention you need,” you argued. “I’m not that person.”
“No! Fucking no! Shut up!” he barked, turning your face back to him and silencing you with a kiss.
Even with the heater warming up the room, the cold air that seeped through the walls and windows still reached your naked form. After being rid of your sweater, bra, and drenched panties, the only warmth you could find was from Katsuki’s body. And he made sure to share it with you so generously.
Pain after pain, bite after bite. Katsuki would not stop no matter how desperately you begged him to. Your skin was his canvas, not only your neck, but your cheeks, breasts, belly, arms, thighs, calves; they were tender and hurt to touch. You would have to refrain yourself from looking into the mirror for too long, maybe. Luckily it was winter, this way, nobody would bat an eye if you covered yourself up like it was minus twenty celsius.
“I’m gonna fuck you raw, okay? Haven’t fucked anyone since you left. You gotta take care of me, princess.”
“Don’t bullshit me,” you returned. “You fucked that girl.”
And it still hurt just thinking about it.
“Did not.”
Even so, had he gone mad? He sounded like it. Wearing condoms was the strictest rule of his when it came to sex. As far as you knew, he never broke it once, not for anyone, not for you. But you could be wrong—you didn’t want to—because now, he actually looked eager to go through with it, fucking you bareback.
Too risky, too intimate.
“You’ll regret it. Please just—think before you act.”
Trying to reason with Katsuki, you also attempted to move away. Big mistake. Catching you by your thighs, he forced himself closer and wrapped your legs around his waist. Then, he placed his unshielded cock on your folds and pushed it down a bit for the head to slither in, just the tip, nothing more.
“Katsuki, no!”
“Katsuki, yes,” he said, mockingly, and shoved it all in.
—
The bed shook and squeaked annoyingly from how hard he rammed into your tight weeping hole, but the moans you were trying, but not so successfully, to suppress were so adorable he was able to overlook it and focus on you instead. He never knew his bed did this, never brought anyone home to fuck before.
He almost spilled in the first five minutes, having to slow down to prolong the feeling of being wrapped and rubbed by a pussy, skin to skin. And you—lying there with your brows frowned and tits bouncing—did not help shit. Trying feebly to push him away when he swooped down for a kiss only stirred up his excitement, making him go rougher until you gasped and gave in.
What a soft and tempting little lamb you were. He wanted to brand you with his cum and give you his fucking name, knocking you up with a couple of brats for you and him to take to school and hear a teacher address you as Mrs. Bakugou with his own ears.
Since the day you handed him that letter, you had never been anyone else’s but his. Must have been fate, he didn’t know, didn’t care about a what-if either. His only regret was that he could have had a taste of you sooner, but he would call it a story arc and leave it at that—he had you now anyway.
“Say my name, princess,” he demanded.
“Kat—suki.”
“Again.”
“Katsuki!”
This was worth it. The tirade of rebuke his mom delivered to his ears and the smacks on the head while saying she never taught him to be like this when he came clean about what he did to you—all was worth it.
“I’ll get her back, mom,” Katsuki convinced. “We’ll get her back.”
“You better.”
It was convenient that his mom already liked you as if you were the one who popped out of her vagina and not him. Well, they were the same in that aspect. Who would have thought it would come to this day, the day he wanted to trap you in his home, when just a decade earlier, he would never have had the slightest idea of granting you the permission to step past the front gate.
“She’s a good kid,” his mom commented. “The same girl who walked you home and bought you that All Might figure, no?”
“Yeah.” Katsuki rolled his eyes.
“Aha.”
“Will you help me or not?” he asked, irritated. He had been kneeling at her feet for like fifteen minutes.
“Watch your tone, boy.” Mitsuki’s voice hardened. His dad’s hand over her shoulder rubbed gently to calm her quick temper down.
“Tch!”
The tiny mutt chose that moment to strut into the living room, stealing his mom’s attention. She leaned down to pick it up and put it on her lap. It looked down at him, tongue lolling out of its mouth. Conceited little fucker.
“You know why I named her Katsumi, Katsuki?”
“Oh, don’t give me that shit.”
“Katsuki,” his dad said in a reprimanding tone.
“She reminds me of you, angry for no reason, always bark, bark, bark. It gets lonely around here, so why not.” Mitsuki smiled, scratching her new child’s head. “And you—remind me of her.”
Katsuki squinted his eyes, kinda knew where this was going.
“A dog, waiting for its owner to come home.”
She was not wrong.
“Yes, I will help you, son.”
A series of bangs on the door broke through the memory and his euphoria. He just came, hard, pouring his pent-up, ripe seeds far up your cunt, and someone wanted to butt in now? Katsuki huffed, but refused to get up and find out who wanted what, dead set on keeping you plugged up.
Another rapping on the door, then a voice followed. “That’s enough, Katsuki. Let the poor thing out.”
Of course, it had to be his mom.
“Go away, hag.”
“Bakugou Katsuki!”
“We’ll be out!”
Just not now. He omitted, and it worked. Mitsuki carried a string of grumbles and footsteps with her, leaving nothing behind. Katsuki turned to you, still under him, in time to see you avert your gaze away. Cute.
“Can I go now?” you asked.
“No.” He changed positions, turning over onto his back and getting you on top of him, cock still snug inside your walls. He hoped he didn’t spill a single drop.
“Katsuki, I don’t want to fight anymore.”
“Then don’t, baby.”
“I can’t live like this. Please”—you pleaded with your eyes—“don't hurt me anymore.”
He couldn’t help but feel a pang in his heart at your frail tone. Looking at you, he saw a woman with dark rings under her eyes, beautiful, but she looked like she had seen better days—a stark contrast to the girl who held out a letter towards him on that spring day, wind in her hair, kindness abundant enough to share.
Before he knew it, words were out of his mouth. “I wish I had hurt you less.”
It would not have been possible for him to not hurt you at all. He knew himself well enough to believe otherwise. He also knew, for certain, how he would like the story to go.
“Do you still love me? Like you wrote in that letter.” he whispered. “Am I still your hero, princess?”
“You don’t”—you gritted your teeth—“have the right to ask me those questions.”
“I’ll be yours. I want to.” And fuck, he really did, just thinking about it woke his flaccid cock up, rigid again inside of you. Putting his hands on both of your asscheeks, he grinded you up and down. “Do you still love me?”
You kept quiet, unyielding, only small, faint gasps could be heard.
“Guess that’s not important.” Katsuki decided. “I’ll keep you first—fuck the answer out of you later.”
Panic flashed upon your expression at his declaration, and gasps turned into lustful whimpers when he started slamming your hips up and down his erect shaft.
“How long are you gonna make me wait? A year? A decade? As revenge, maybe?” He took your sweet mouth, hand pressing down the nape of your neck to keep it still. “House will be full of brats by then, but take your time, princess.”
“This will never work out. It won’t. It won’t,” you cried, shutting your eyes tight. “I can’t share you.”
Katsuki didn’t know why, but you not wanting to share him was sexy as shit. The mere thought of sharing you, however, made him want to put something on fire. Was this jealousy people were talking about? It burnt like a bitch.
“Who said anything about sharing?” he grunted, slapping your jouncing ass, making you squeal. “And this goes both ways, princess. Don’t think I would let anyone touch you.”
He was pissed just imagining it, which was nowhere near healthy, but who wanted that. He just wanted you, in any way he possibly could.
“I’m—I’m gonna come,” you spluttered, convulsing around him.
“That’s it. Come on my cock, baby. Make your man proud.”
Your velvety walls tightened, constricting his cock and milking it when ropes of cum shot out.
Sucked dry and spent, Katsuki closed his eyes and tried to rein in his breath. When he reopened them, it was to check if you were still with him—you were, resting on his chest with one cheek against it. Out of cuteness aggression, he pinched the other side.
You let out a short screech. “That hurt!”
The thought of marking you reared its head, biting where it hadn’t been bitten yet, hurting you a little more. But he stifled it, saving it for later.
Steering himself to another matter, he said, “You never texted me back.”
“I blocked you.”
“Figured.” Katsuki nodded.
“Deserved.”
“Unblock me.”
You sighed.
—
The messages wouldn’t go through even if you unblocked him. That was how the application worked, which was fine with him. Scrolling through the one-sided chat, he could sense urgency and desperation through each letter, and some messages actually sounded mental. It would be for the best if you didn’t see them.
‘Answer’
‘i didn’t fuck her, she left. Now fucking answer’
‘come back, i wont be mad. where u at.’
‘I am still at your apartment, u. didn’t come back. where r u’
‘i fucking found your letter. i’ll find u too’
“You—kept my present?”
Katsuki looked up from his phone to your towel-swathed form, fresh out of the shower. Following your line of sight, he was directed to the bottom of the bookshelf where an All Might figure was set—his seventeenth birthday present from you. It was one of his top favorites, but he would never tell you that.
“I’m not stupid enough to throw things I like away, I’ll have you know.” He scowled and went back to scrolling on his phone.
‘so u moved away huh?’
‘need you. don’t wanna fuck my hand anymore :(’
‘never mind, bitch’
‘u love me huh?’
‘Pathetic’
‘didnt mean that’
‘need u’
‘i'm an attention seeking whore who abuses your love to get the validation i want.’
‘sorry’
‘there i said it.’
‘now come back’
Yeah, you didn’t have to know any of that.
#bakugou x reader#bakugou x you#bakugou katuski x reader#bakugou katsuki x you#katsuki bakugo x reader#katsuki x you#katsuki x reader#mha x reader#mha smut#bnha smut#bnha x reader#bnha bakugou#tw.breeding
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HEARTBREAK ON TOUR!
charles leclerc x famous!reader
summary: in which the lavender haze has been lifted. or in which america’s it couple splits.
part 9:foreign affairs, series masterlist
faceclaim: madison beer
ally’s radio 📻: PART 9! anyways, stan y/n l/n for clear skin and good grades!✨😌
INSTAGRAM, july 18
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yourinstagram mood :') gonna cry all day lol. thank you for your warmth. thank you for listening n hearing me. i love you.
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ntltcy/n whoever said the second slide is so real
danielricciardo I said what I said
zendaya ma’am is taking up all 10 spots on the 10 ten…that’s my best friend ❤️!!!
channeleclerc16_ she should just stick to acting…
beyonce well deserved! the song brought actual tears to my eyes
yourinstagram beyonce screaming crying shaking…thank u, i love u always
leclerc_pascale beautiful girl congrats
yourinstagram leclerc_pascale thank u mama
drewstarkey on repeat i fear
ferarrileclerc i mean ... since the song is about charles that means he got another number one hit! charles congrats baby!
harrystyles A beautiful song from an even more beautiful person. Congratulations, Y/n/n—H.
ypurinstagram thank u sweet angel. miss you!
redlipclassicy/n harrystyles yourinstagram WHAT THE FUCK
JULY 18, 2023
Lola Ransdell Under Fire for Using the N-Word in Resurfaced Tweets
Not a good look.
BY ALLY JULY 17, 2023 11:15 AM
Lola Randell has some explaining to do. The 25-year-old came under fire on Sunday when Twitter users began resurfacing tweets of the model using the N-word in 2020. The receipts included direct messages and Instagram comments, in which Ransdell called her friends the racial slur, as well as tweets from Ransdell claiming that she could use the N-word because she’s “not white.”
In screenshots resurfaced by the Twitter PopHub, Ransdell can be seen calling someone an “ugly” N-word. The screenshots also include a group chat with some of her friends, in which she is called out for using the N-word. In her response, Randell explains that she can use the derogatory term because she’s not white. (Ransdell’s mother is Brazilian, but that still does not excuse her behavior.) “I’m not white tho so that’s awk,” Ransdell responded.
However, the receipts don’t end there. Along with the first screenshots, some users also resurfaced other old tweets, in which Ransdell said that she returned a ��different race” after she spent some time tanning in Florida. (She accompanied the tweet with an emoji of a man with a turban.) Another screenshot also shows Ransdell liking a 2020 meme comparing Jay-Z to a Ransdell. One user also claimed to have a video of Ransdell rapping the N-word, though the audio is unclear.
Ransdell allegedly once tweeted, "leaving to Florida white but coming back to NY a different Race." The statement was accompanied by an emoji of a white blonde man and an emoji of a darker-skinned man wearing a turban.
A post from 2019 read, "With @chanteljefferies and that awkward moment when ur at a Chinese restaurant and your waiter isn't Chinese...."
The following year, she allegedly threatened, "Shut up before I smack you back to your own country!"
Screenshots also show the youtuber allegedly liking an Instagram post from 2018 about how only men and women should marry because the Bible says so.
Then there are the women-hating posts.
Ransdell allegedly liked an undated Instagram post showing a photo of Selena Gomez that posed the question, "Would you smack her for $835 BILLION?!" The person whose reply was featured in the meme read, "I'd smack her for a sweet tea from McDonald's."
In 2018, Ransdell allegedly tweeted about transgendered women" being "wicked slutty."
She's also been accused of openly hating on her boyfriend’s former partner, Y/n L/n.
Once a fan of Charles (and even of Charles and Y/n together), Ransdell seemingly turned on the 26-year-old singer when "Your/Ship/Name" was on the rocks.She allegedly once followed a Y/n L/n hate account on Instagram and allegedly favorited/liked a tweet from 2022 that showed a picture of Y/n and read, "She collects guys as if they were infinity stones."
How these receipts surfaced is unclear (many of them are private messages between Ransdell and her friends, so someone must have leaked them on the internet), but it’s certain that people aren’t happy with Ransdell using slur, even as a joke. After the tweets resurfaced, many users took to Twitter to call out Ransdell for her offensive behavior, as well as demand accountability and an apology from her and her Formula One boyfriend, Charles Leclerc.
SEE MORE RELATED POSTS:
• Charles Leclerc finally addresses messy breakup with Singer Y/n L/n.
•Harry Styles just commented on Y/n L/n’s Instagram post for the first time in 7 years.
• Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince: Harry Styles and Y/n L/n’s relationship timeline
INSTAGRAM, july 18
liked by f1wh0re, corneliastreety/n, and 546,782 others
y/naflorals CHAR!ES SPEAKING ABOUT MOTHER TODAY IN AN INTERVIEW
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dressy/n no comment.
lewismercedes ur joe king…ur joe. king.
leclerc16charles as a charles fan…idk either i’m sorry
TWITTER, july 18
INSTAGRAM STORIES, july 18
yourinstagram 9m
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TWITTER, july 18
ally’s radio 📻:i don’t like this chapter 😞. also pls know that anything that was mentioned within lola’s article is not something i condone!! pls don’t think i’m a bad person, it’s literally only just for the plot😭!! i got inspo off of hailey biebers old tweets sooo. if u see ur username but u weren’t tagged, it’s bc tumblr wouldn’t let me :( if u asked me to tag u and i didn’t, pls send me a message or inbox me bc it might’ve gotten lost 😭 i try to stay up-to-date but sometimes i miss people so pls lmk!!!
taglist 🦢🪩: @incoherenciass@dakotali@405rry@topaz125@sassyheroneckgiant@hevburn@itsmytimetoodream@ivegotparticulartaste@crowdedimagines @asterianax @haydee5010@scenesofobx@christinabae@magical-spit@dessxoxsworld@myareadsbooks@honethatty12@hopefulinlove@diasnohibng@gentlemonsterjennie1@hummusxx@eugene-emt-roe@taestrwbrry @perjarma @cxcewg@chimchimjiminie16@glow-ish@allywthsr @millyswife@mrsmaybank13@black-swan-blog27 @stargaryenx@lilsiz@ohthemisssery@leclerclvr@slytherinjimin3nthusiast@shessthunderstoms@cool-ultra-nerd@ncentic@playboykenz @canvashearts @tinyhrry @xeliaaaa @ifionlywould @gaviypedrisbride @callsignwindow @dhhdhsiavdhaj@chasing-liberosis@laneyspaulding19@a-daydreamersday@saikikusouswife@motorsp0rt@lifesuckslife@shessthunderstoms@drewsandsebastianswife @sainzluvrr@ietss @agustdlvr @sarahkaliii @sweethoneyblossom1@sticksdoesart @ayoanna @c0wgirlswag @ifionlywould @l1ghtaura @ellesmythe @avada-kedavra-bitch-187
#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc#heartbreak on tour#twobluejeans#daniel riccardo x reader#f1 imagine#lando norris x reader#charles leclerc x you#carlos sainz jr#charlesleclerc#lando norris#lando norris x you#lewis hamilton x reader#lewis hamilton#daniel ricciardo x reader#daniel ricciardo#scuderia ferrari#ferrari f1#f1 instagram au#f1#f1 x reader#formula 1#f1 fanfic#max verstappen#max verstappen x reader#harry styles x reader#harry styles x platonic!reader#taylor swift#charles leclerc social media fanfic#charles leclerc imagine
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Hii i love ur work i was wondering if u could do an angst story when ur the fem 9th member and jyp adds another fem member and they start ignoring you yelling at u and acting harsh and only one member is by ur side all the time
Replaceable
-9th skz
Warning: yelling, panic attacks, harsh tones, angst
Pairing: I.N x 9th member
Summary: a new member joins your group and it seems everything starts crashing down when you realize your being slowly replaced.
!not proofread!
Hey thank you so much for the request! I hope you enjoy this short story lol! Have a good day 🩷
**
"Chan? I don't know where you are but I've been outside. Waiting. You promised to pick me up remember? Just text me or call me when you get this." I send the voicemail and let out a frustrated sigh. Had he forgotten to pick you up again? This was starting to become really annoying.
The last time he forgot because apparently the new girl, Haneul, needed help recoding something for the album. I let it go because it was the album after all and I want what's best for the team. But this time I had no idea why he wasn't texting or picking up.
The sky starts to drizzle and I let out a sigh. Slowly starting the walk home. I knew I was going to be soaking wet when I arrive at the dorms so I just put my phone in my bag to avoid it from getting spoilt.
The past few weeks, the schedule was really busy especially now that their was a 10th member. Everyone was trying to make her feel like home even offering her MY room as I took the couch until we were transferred to our new dorm. It was frustrating because now everyone's attention was on her and the fact that the boys were excited for a girl joining got me thinking that maybe they were tired of me.
The rain was pouring heavy now and my tears were too. Last week Han forgot to practice with you because he was with Haneul teaching her the rap part for the new song. Last week Felix forgot that you were making brownies with him and decided to do it with Haneul instead. Last week Changbin double booked his schedule with the recording studio and told me to come at a later date because Haneul needed more attention. LAST week Leeknow took her to the new game park when he had promised me to go with.
Haneul was slowly getting me replaced. The less I talked the more nobody would notice me.
My phone vibrates and I quickly pull out my phone.
"H-hello?" I say into it while snifling.
"Y/nie? Love? Are you there? What's all that noise?" I hear I.N's voice booming through the phone obviously panicking.
"I'm walking home." I sadly say looking at the puddles that had completely got my shoes wet.
"But it's raining dogs and cats outside! Yah! You're going to get sick."
"Chan forgot to pick me up again but it's okay I'm like 2 minutes away from the house."
"Oh baby. Let me make you some hot chocolate and run you a bath."
"You don't have to babe-"
"No I will! Now hurry along please. I want you home safe."
I say a little bye before rushing to get home.
My shoes let out squishy sounds against the hard wood floor as I make my way through the house.
"Where's Chan?" I glare at Changbin who's walking to the kitchen.
He stops and his eyes go wide when he finally sees me. "Oh my God. What happened babydoll?" He gasps at the state I'm in.
"Where. Is. Chan?" I ask one more time. Angry wasn’t even the word that could explain the emotion I felt at the moment.
"His in the studio-"
I walk past him and charge at the studio where I open the door to find him with Haneul laughing at something.
Was he being Foreal right now?
"Chan how could you?!" I say hurt at him causing him to jump and look up at me.
"Y/n? Oh my God what happened to you? Why are you soaking wet-"
"You fucking forgot to pick me up from schedules Where were you huh? Huh?" I frown and glare at him.
He looks panicked as he picks up his phone to check his reminders but his eyes open wide in realization.
"Oh my God- y/nie I'm so sorry. Haneul-"
“It’s okay,” I say not even bothering to fight with him. It wasn’t worth it. It was tiring.
"What’s going on guys?" Leeknow says coming into the room confused.
“Yah! Y/n your getting the whole house wet with your clothes? What’s your problem?” He scolds me.
“I had to walk through the rain and you don’t even care, no need to yell at me.”
The boys all start piling up into the room trying to figure out what the matter was.
"Y/n! Your wet!" Han exclaims
“Yes I think I get the point people!” I groan and shiver as the cold air hits my body.
“Y/n go get change please, now I have to clean up your mess,” Leeknow’s tone is harsh. I can hear it with a tint of frustration.
“Jeez Leeknow you won’t even bother to ask if I’m okay?” I roll my eyes trying to avoid the tears that threatened to fall down my cheeks once again.
He just dismisses me with his hand and walks out the room to do whatever he had too.
“Anyways, Haneul do you still wanna watch riverdale later?” My neck snaps at the direction that Hyunjin stood. Did he just say riverdale?
“Yeah yeah, I hope it’s not too much work but I was wondering if we could also make those little friendship bracelets-“
“Hyunjin did you just say riverdale? That’s our show,” my voice is now soft and quivering. Why would he watch our show with her.
“Y/n don’t be selfish, she’s just watching season one. It’s not a big deal.” He didn’t care. He didn’t care at all.
“We can alwyaks watch another series Hyunjin I don’t mind really-“
“Nah Y/n will be okay she’s just being dramatic like always,”
My breathing started to pick up. I couldn’t hold in the tears anymore. I was cold, tired, hungry and emotional. The sob that left my lips represented all that.
Chan’s eyes go wide when he notices the distress I’m in. “Hey, why are you crying? Are you okay?”
I don’t even bother to answer and just walk past the boys that stood by the door looking confused and worried.
“What’s the matter Y/n? Is it because of riverdale? Please don’t tell me you’re crying over that!” Hyunjin says as his hand grabs mine.
“You guys treat me like such a bother ever since she got here. I don’t know what I’ve done wrong. I’m I boring to you guys now? All of you have been mean or pushing me aside for her. I don’t even ask for much but to have my friends back. If you don’t want me in the group anymore just tell me.”
I’m a mess, I’m a mess. I free myself from his grip before walking up the stairs where I run into I.N. He gives me a smile and realizes the state I’m in. His smile drops.
“Hey- woah woah woah, what’s wrong?” He asks but he was the only one that knew the current position I was in. I had told him the day he saw Chan snap at me when we were learning a new choreography and I had messed up.
“I’m- I’m just tired.” I cry as he automatically pulls me into his arms.
“Don’t cry hmmm. It’s okay I’ve got you okay? Let’s go upstairs and get you showered and changed. Then we can talk about it okay?” He whispers in my ear and I just nod in response.
He pulls me up the stairs and into my room where I find my pajamas laid out and some candles lit. The bathroom was running.
He slowly undresses me and guides me into the bathroom where I sit in the hot bathtub.
“Join me?” I ask well basically whimper. Craving his touch.
He chuckles. “Yeah sure my love. You miss me hm?”
“Yeah,” I softly say before blushing.
He gets undressed and gets into the tab. He leans back as I sit in between his legs. My body slowly meting into his.
He leaves tiny kisses on my naked shoulders while slowly massaging my neck. I find my body relaxing and slowly shutting down.
“Hey do you wanna talk about it now?”
“Mmm, it’s just that Everbody’s been acting so different towards me eve since she joined, I told you this last time but now it’s worse. Sometimes they don’t even acknowledge my existence.” I sigh feeling the sadness start to rise again.
“Baby, I told you last time to talk to them about it. What happened?”
“I don’t know I geuss, I geuss I just don’t want to make them feel like they’re picking.”
“But it���s your feelings that matter
**
LMAO THIS IS LIKE ONE OF THE FIRST STORIES I TRIED TO DO, SHOULD I DROP IT?😭
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홍중 k.HJ
kim hongjoong 𖹭 fem idol!reader
DESTINY.
synopsis: idol!reader is very open about her love for ateez kim hongjoong, scandal breaks, they end up together. (feat. bang chan of skz being wise.)
content: eventual smut mdni, cringe/crack, angst if u squint, strangers2friends2lovers, reader uses she/her pronouns, slow burn?, this is shit, choppy storyline lots of time skips and anticlimactic, fluffy?, lots of use of the pet name 'baby', cuddling, big sexy hongjoong, swearing, not proofread, lowercase intended. explicit warnings: in the studio couch, handjob, p in v, no prep, vanilla, unprotected, creampie, sub/dom undertones?, virgin/inexperienced reader
guide: italics in dialogues are used when they speak in korean. chat fonted dialogues are comments and exchanged texts. long blocks of dialogues are used during lives because they're not really doing anything apart from speaking!
zuzu's note: main masterlist. the girl in the picture is just a reference/icon to get the overall vibe of the "idol aesthetic." also, because it's difficult to make things neutral, i created your group and fandom's name, and also put in a groupmate's name in as placeholders because it's difficult to write without mentioning them lol.
you spent two years honing your skills as a trainee at a modest, struggling company before rising to fame as the leader of your own group, DESTINY. your impressive duality on stage, seamlessly transitioning from intense, commanding dance moves and mature raps to the charming, feminine aegyo concept, quickly won over fans. your first award was hard-earned for your sultry debut song titled "Sit." (in which you would subtly imply that you want to sit on someone's face).
you, in particular, gained a significant international following because of your hilarious bedroom lives where you would often deliver sassy comebacks to fans, showcase your impressive english language skills, and share random chatter that fans couldn't help but love. Initially, you became known for your goofy on-screen personality. however, as your talents and stage presence shone through, it was no surprise that people fell for you.
DESTINY has cemented their status as THE 5th generation girl group, making waves in the music industry. numerous renowned idols you adored in the past (one of which, was Kim Hongjoong) have taken notice of your group's bold lyrics and praised your distinctive style and captivating concept.
one day, you decide to hop onto instagram to go live and have a casual chat with your dedicated fans, also known as fates, during a brief pause from rehearsing the dance routine for your upcoming comeback album titled "idgaf." despite having beads of sweat clinging to your forehead and being slightly winded from the dance, you maintain a casual conversation with your viewers;
"so, a few days ago i was on my phone and i was watching these uh, these compilations of other idols talking about me—" you pause to catch your breath and slightly chuckle at how ridiculous you sound. "someone made one of those cute videos on youtube." you repeat in korean. "my favorite part was when they showed ateez reaction to me casually rapping that one part in WORK during one of my lives..." you took a deep inhale and looked away as you thought about it some more. "hongjoong-sunbaenim was sooo, aaaagh! he was— i mean, okay, so, don't like, make a big deal out of this, but i had a hugeeee crush on him for so long, so long, like, before i debuted, i swear, his charizzma is unmatched!!! aaaaaGH, he COMPLIMENTED MY RAPPING IN THE VIDEO! and then i began to wonder if, like, was my rapping even good? damn, i could've done better if i knew hongjoong-sunbaenim would watch it. he was also, actually my inspiration as a leader and a producer..."
you continued chattering on, unaware that your manager would soon reprimand you for discussing that particular topic, citing potential negative consequences. however, it wasn't a major issue, since your fans actually valued your candidness. sure, there were a few hateful remarks scattered among the positive comments, but many responded positively, with remarks such as:
"help she's so real 😭"
"waaah, wishing i was hongjoon rn"
"she can't have hongjoong! he is dating atiny" — "she is atiny tho?" someone replied.
"totally ship them" and it was all enough to make your day.
it's not too long before you come across a reel on instagram that many fans tagged you in; hongjoong reacting to a clip of you simping over him on your livestream. your heartbeat picked up its pace and you sat up properly, raising the volume on your phone as you mentally prepared yourself for the video.
"yahh, i already saw this." he says and you pause the video. fuck. you play it again. "honestly, i thought it was a bit cute." you blush and kick your feet until he speaks again. "it's rare to see junior idols showcasing their admiration for their seniors, but it's really nice, i really like it... especially when they admire me," he shows a heart to the camera. "y/n, if you're watching this, please continue to show your love and support to ateez!"
you were a little disappointed because he seemed to spin it off that you were just a supportive junior/atiny, but you decided to brush it off.
weeks pass and the topic dies down until a photo of you and hongjoong chatting while he signed your album at their fansign event was spreading around the internet and rumors began — you didn't think it would be hidden since it was a public event, but you also didn't think that it would be a scandal. it's your first time being able to chat with hongjoong at all and the dating rumors are just ridiculous. your manager gives you the go signal and you decide to address the rumors by going live in your iconic bed, the lights are dim and you're bare faced, wearing glasses —
"helllooo..." you adjusted the camera at the foot of the bed and you laid on your stomach in front of it. "yesterday... i met kim hongjoong-sunbaenim of ateez..." you paused as you thought about what to say next — you didn't want a script, you wanted to stay yourself: authentic and genuine.
"and today, i was very disappointed because many fates say that we are dating and expressed their hatred for the idea... i would like to point out that i only admire him now as my senior and inspiration for being an idol! i would like to address that, honestly, the dating rumors are a bit ridiculous just because i said i had a crush. it was my first time meeting hongjoong-sunbaenim," your tone was a bit defensive and pouty, you paused as you fiddled with your earring and stared at the camera, snivveling.
"it was my very first time meeting him, it was awkward. more awkward than if he was with a regular fan, maybe because i am an idol and i expressed my admiration for him very publicly, but he was very kind and considerate about it. he really expressed his appreciation for me as his junior and atiny and that was the extent of our interaction. i hope you guys don't spread rumors like this again even if it's true, it would be private business and you shouldn't gossip about someone's love life like this. if you guys like it so much, i suggest you guys focus on your own." you make a light joke of the situation, slightly hoping you don't get hate for that as well. soon after that live, you posted a selfie you took with hongjoong at the fansign event with the caption "forever atiny! 🫶" and you decided to stop and stray away from the whole hongjoong topic because you didn't want to cause him any more trouble.
luckily, after that, many fates decided to come forward and be more open as they showed a lot of support for you and hongjoong.
"this is ridiculous! she shouldn't have to address those dumb rumors, please respect them! they are idols, your baseless rumors could ruin their career."
"i feel so bad for her and hongjoong. i love their innocent chemistry and i believe they should interact more often! male and female idols should be able to interact without being "accused" of dating. like she said, even if they are, it is none of our business! so sad that she'll probably have avoid him after this. so disappointed in whoever made the rumors."
months later, your group and ateez both were in Chicago, USA for your comeback world tour at the same time and while you were there, you decided to attend their concert and you screamed at the top of your lungs and went along every fan chant like a pro, you were far away from the stage so there were no hopes of being noticed — since it was convenient, your managers decided that your group and ateez should collaborate on dances of your comeback title songs, and naturally, you and hongjoong were paired together by your managers in hopes of using this dance as a warning for fans not to mess with the two of you. much to your convenience, the title track of your comeback album is "idgaf."
"hongjoong-sunbaenim!" you slightly jogged over to him and the staff and group members and bowed as deep as you could, your manager and fellow DESTINY members following close by.
"there's no need for that," hongjoong waves you off as you came back up and you chuckle slightly as you awkwardly look around the silent room — you often gossiped with your members about how you'd 'let hongjoong do things to you' among other questionable remarks, and right now you silently hope they wouldn't say a word about it. "i already learned the dance earlier, it's really good! i heard you choreographed it? " hongjoong attempts at small talk and you nod politely in response, holding your hands together, noticing the ateez members behind him glancing at you guys, whispering, and chuckling.
"yes, it took me a month to perfect the choreography before i taught my members." you explain, but before hongjoong could continue, one of the staff unknowingly interrupts your chat.
"okayyy, let's get started! in your positions, please."
you guys complete the dance on the second take, and once it was posted, the fans absolutely adore your chemistry (just as you did) they fawn over the idea of you and hongjoong together (just as you did).
after the posting of the dance, you have a casual live featuring your group mate, nina, who also spoke english. the theme; "doing face masks in my bed and eating ramen." during that very live, you receive a notification while your friend talks to the viewers. you picked you your phone to check what it was, your heart almost literally stopped.
kim hongjoong...
was...
following you back on instagram.
your eyes almost popped out of your head and you let out a really long high pitched screech.
"what? " nina looks at you, befuddled but laughing at your odd reaction. after a few seconds you still don't respond to her as you kick your feet. "ya, what is it? " she attempts once again and lean over your shoulder to check your phone but you slam it down on the bed. you slowly turn to her, trying and failing to contain your smile as you whisper so the audience couldn't hear.
"hongjoong-sunbaenim is following me on instagram..."
her eyes widen and she smiles. "are you sure?" she asked in a high pitched voice and you nodded frantically, showing her your phone. her smile widens and the two of you couldn't hold it in anymore — you both begin squealing and grabbing each others hands live and the fate's comments kept coming in.
"what are you two talking abouttt???"
"i didn't hear what she said!"
fans would soon understand what you were screeching about and this time, instead of dating rumors, it was "feeling" rumors. fans would gossip and speculate about how you two obviously had feelings for each other, other speculations include your "random chemistry" with hongjoong to be a marketing strategy — to always put you two together to gather more attention, likes, and fan reactions.
what they don't know is that they are correct on both accounts; because you and hongjoong so obviously had feelings each other the staff would always put you together.
the tipping point.
hongjoong posted a picture on his story of a ticket purchase to your world tour comeback concert.
the concert is coming to an end.
DESTINY is singing the encore, which is also your last chance; ever since hongjoong posted that on his story you made a plan. but you told everyone that it was in the heat of the moment when you did it. that's what you told yourself — the adrenaline, your sore muscles, your vocal cords beginning to strain, the screams of fate, the sound of your heartbeat, the thought of hongjoong. your lines in the song were coming close — before the beat drops, you skip toward the center and you raise your hand, microphone close to your mouth, you screamed.
"HONGJOONG-SUNBAENIM!" you scream out, your voice echoing through the arena. "this one's for you!" the fate fans erupt into a frenzy of deafening screams and cheers. the stunned expressions of the DESTINY members are captured on the iphone cameras held by fans. "FATE! let me hear you FUCKING SCREAM YOUR HEARTS OUT!" you shout, launching into the chorus of the song. as the beat drops and the intensity kicks in, everything around you becomes a hazy blur, and for a moment, your mind goes blissfully blank.
as the concert reaches its finale, the members of DESTINY retreat backstage to catch their breath and decompress. you immediately seek refuge in the nearest chair, plopping down and exhaling a loud, tired sigh.
"ya, y/n, what were you thinking?" nina sits on the chair next to you. "we don't know what could happen now."
that was the worst possible feeling to have as an idol. the anxiety of what comes next.
...it reminded you of the time mingi swore to jongho on a live.
"it's not that big of a deal," you say as you chug and finish an entire bottle of water. "it's to feed fate's hunger..."
"yaaah, how you think hongjoong-sunbaenim would react? " she ponders and you shrug, choosing not to think about it. despite your nonchalant demeanor, you completely regret it. 'how would everyone react?' sure, you constantly openly express your admiration for him everywhere else, but onstage was something else, 'what happened to professionalism?' you sigh and put your hand on your forehead. you're going to get in a lot of trouble with your manager now.
that nonsense yet iconic line would get you the title of the "most ballsy k-pop leader of the 5th generation " which is also the headline of the hit article that would later accuse you of being "too forward" with your "poor attempt" at bringing modern media and standards to korean culture and k-pop. back then, your line at the concert would not be acceptable, but now there are so many of your fans — your fates defending you, supporting you, and fighting all of the haters and closed fates who openly express their distaste and negativity for your unprofessional behaviour. you still believe that you deserve at least half of it.
it's no surprise that hongjoong doesn't share or post any public reaction to your iconic line of 2024, unlike you, an immature newer idol, he has been in the entertainment industry longer and is an expert on how to maintain professionalism, especially when it comes to dating scandals. agh, he probably lost his respect for you after that moment.
another few weeks pass. to your surprise, even after your unprofessional behaviour, DESTINY was invited to an award show, and during one of the performances, nature called, so you got up to head to the bathroom. in one of the hallways, the smallest of small chances and the most cliche of cliches happened. you and hongjoong stood in front of each other at the hallway that led to the bathrooms, you bow deeply and greet him softly, a bit embarrased you hunch in shame. "hello..."
"y/n-ah! " he's surprisingly relaxed, he raises a hand forward and you awkwardly double check it before high fiving him and he puts it back in his pocket. "how are you? i've actually been a bit of a fate myself these past few weeks and that thing you said at the concert wasss, wow."
'okay, so he addressed the elephant in the room just like that. was it even the elephant for him? it seemed like a koala, or... a chipmunk or something.' goes through your mind. you awkwardly chuckle and push your hair away from your face. "yeah... i'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable, i've regretted it ever since—"
"no! you don't have to be. it was cool. really cool. i liked it." he says. his cute, reassuring smile remains and you can't help but smile back.
"really?" you ask, you don't how pathetic you sound asking it but hongjoong liked how it came out of your mouth — your personality now is so soft-spoken and different from the "ballsy 5th gen leader" the internet made you out to be, he adored the duality. "i was actually super nervous, i was afraid you would think i ruined the face of my group or something and unfollow me on instagram..." you ramble nervously.
"ya, i would never! " he said and took his phone out. "i am a certified fate from here on out, you and are- are the fate-inies." he handed you his phone. "i was actually wondering if we can exchange contacts?" you look at him, shocked painted across your face.
"really???" you ask and don't hesitate to grab his phone. "of course!" you try your best not to sound too eager but of course, you fail. hongjoong laughs at your innocent reaction and you return his phone. he smiles, satisfied, and lifts it up and shaking the screen in front of you.
"i'll text you," he says casually. "will you reply?" you nod, trying to contain your smile because you don't wanna scare him away.
"of course! why else would i give you my number?" he makes way for you in the small hallway and mumbles a farewell as he waves his hand and he begins to walk away, you turn and watch him until he's out of sight before you run to the bathroom, slam the door behind you and scream your lungs out in the mirror. you totally lost the urge to pee and you return to your groupmates immediately after, already gossiping about what went down. later that night, DESTINY wins an award, you celebrate, and head back to your dorm, wash up and fall on your bed where you would receive a text from hongjoong.
hongjoong: "yo! congratulations on your win! i was very happy when DESTINY was announced and saw you onstage ㅋㅋㅋㅋ."
you bite your nail, thinking of your response.
you: "hi! tysm! congratulations on your award as well. it's expected of ateez-sunbaenim, i already see it coming ㅋㅋㅋ"
hongjoong: "ah, don't be like that. it's hard to live up to expectations"
you chuckle at his response. his typing style was different than you expected. you got ready to type out another response until he messaged again.
hongjoong: "btw, when r u available? we should celebrate our win together. as leaders."
your heart skips a beat... or two. is he asking you out?
you: "how about tomorrow night?"
hongjoong: "oh, no can do. ateez celebration party tomorrow with a few close friends."
you sigh and you're about to put your phone down for the night when you reel another vibration.
hongjoong: "unless u wanna come? ur more than welcome"
you: "idk, it might not be the best choice. will there be other female idols there?"
hongjoong: "uhh, ur being kinda dubious. do you want there to be female idols?"
you: "yes pls"
hongjoong: "then there will be female idols there. why? are you going to choose them over me?"
you: "ㅋㅋㅋㅋ only if the entirety of blackpink are there."
hongjoong: "it might seem crazy what i'm 'bout to say..."
hongjoong: "sorry but lisa was all we could book 4 the night"
you: "U FR?!"
hongjoong: "no"
hongjoong: "ateez is not made of gold. lisa-sunbaenim is also busy with more important matters"
hongjoong: "ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ"
hongjoong: "...are you still coming?"
hongjoong: "..."
hongjoong: "y/n?"
you: "yes! it sounds great"
hongjoong: "great. i'll send u the details, see u there ;)"
...is that a fucking winky face? you swear this man is the bane of your existence.
you go to the party alone — and surprisingly, it isn't the small gathering you expected, there were so many recognizable faces, not just of idols, but actors. the venue is a large vip lounge of an underground club in the city. the interior was obnoxious and practically made of gold —you look around and see choi san leaning on a wall, alone. he's a familiar face that you're comfortable talking with. you make eye contact across the room and you walk your way toward him confidently. "hello, sunbaenim!! congratulations on your win~" you give him a soft smile and he smiles back, taking a sip from the glass in his hand — is that brandy? you watch as he silently puts the cup down on the table next to him without so much as a thanks to your greeting, he puts his hands on each of your cheeks, and you wonder if his drunk until you're flustered as he forcibly turns your head 90° to the right.
"hyung is over there."
you easily recognize your hongjoong.
he is chatting with who you recognize to be bang chan of stray kids but your eyes just lock in on him — everyone else around is suddenly blurred and he's the only one you see. you focus on the way his lips move as he speaks, the way he softly nods — this is him when he thinks you're not watching and it's so damn hot, him being himself. the mere fact that he breathes is hot. damn, you're so in love. san chuckles at how you already forgot he was next to you, he conks you in the head and walks away.
you walk toward hongjoong and excuse yourself to their conversation. "y/n!" he says enthusiastically and places a hand around your shoulders. "bang chan, i'm sure your familiar," hongjoong says casually and he makes eye contact with someone in the room — getting distracted, he walks away. of course, it's his group's celebratoon party, you weren't the only guest he would tend to. you awkwardly look up at bang chan and wave.
"hi, sunbaenim! i really love maniac and superbowl, amazing songs!" you give him two thumbs ups and he giggles bashedly, almost blushing — you knew bangchan to alwayd be a flustered mess, he never knew how to react to compliments. "also, i subscribed to your bubble once, wowwww." you tried to make small talk and he laughed once more.
"yeahhh, i can get pretty crazy there. you know, i would also watch your lives sometimes, you're funny!" he says, and you smile.
"you really think so? aaah, i know i have a lot of cringe moments, especially when i first revealed my crush on hongjoong."
"oh yeah, no, it wasn't cringe at all! everybody in the industry already saw your chemistry from before you mentioned it. i totally support you guys haha." he speaks casually and your eyes widen.
"wh-what? support our what? what do we have? what chemistry?" you ramble and bang chan chuckles.
"relax, relax — it's nothing, just, we see your flirting here and there and you two would be so cute together. but, if you want my advise, i wouldn't recommend going public with it, honestly. DESTINY— it's DESTINY, right? you guys just debuted, i don't think having a public relationship with an idol older than you is the right career choice this early on." he says and you nod along, you totally understood where he was coming from but when you stayed silent too long for comfort, bangchan tilted his head. "hey? did i say something wrong?"
you snapped your attention back at him. "hm? yeah, i mean NO! i completely understand what you said and i agree. plus, there's nothinggg between me and hongjoong, we're just... i don't know we're, okay, so there might be a little bit of a thing, but it'll take a long time until it actually becomes something~" you giggle and bangchan giggles as well and the two of you are just a giggling mess and hongjoong comes back to join your group.
"hey, what's all the giggling about?" he moves his head to look at you, then bang chan, then you, then bang chan — "isn't this your first time being acquainted? why are you two having so much fun without me? " then bangchan just smiles, then looks at you, then hongjoong, then you, then hongjoong.
"i'll get going nowww~" he says in a goofy tone and walks away.
"what's with him?" hongjoong mutters and looks at you. "have you eaten? eat! there's plenty of appetizers and foods around—"
"hongjoong-sunbaenim," you interrupt him. "ah, no... hongjoong-oppa." you look up at him, and he stares at you, expression blank but clearly flustered at the new title he got from you. "what are we?" you decide to live up to your title as the most ballsy kpop leader of the 5th generation and he chokes on air, eyebrows raising and eyes blinking repeatedly as he processes what you said.
"um," hongjoong looks around the room nervously, maybe concerned if anyone overheard what you just said. "i... like- hm? huh? i-" he can barely get a word out and you tilt your head, maybe you shouldn't have been to forward, it was wayyy too soon.
"sorry, you don't have to answer." you say calmly and he lets out a very obvious sigh of relief and you chuckle.
"felt like i was trying to defuse a time bomb." he laughs, holding a hand over his chest and you smile as not to ruin the mood, but your next question would do just that for you.
"but... be honest, this is more than a friendship, right? " you can see his smile falter ever so slightly and the silent pause is way too long for comfort. maybe you shouldn't have asked.
"...we'll see where it goes, yeah? " hongjoong smiles. you nod in understanding and he pets your head ever-so-softly as not to ruin your hair. "let's go, let's enjoy the party."
later that night, he takes you to your dorm in the same car he is being driven home in — he waves goodbye and you bow politely. "i'll text you!" hongjoong says, loud enough for you to hear. the car drives off in the distance and you smile and wave. "i'll reply!" you yell back.
your relationship lasted in the talking stage for a few months. rumors were nonexistent because you and hongjoong didn't have to express your attraction to each other through lives and posts and stories anymore, fans assumed it was because the staff felt the tension between you two died down and stopped using it for clout, little did they know that it all began hiding behind closed doors through hundreds of flirty texts and phone calls, cute selcas, handmade gifts, ordering food for each other, occasional video calls, and personal dates throughout your busy schedule. you were practically dating now but you and hongjoong never had a label.
"so, what are you guys? " wooyoung would ask.
hongjoong takes a moment to answer as he scrolls through his laptop. "...we're in a situationship."
"aren't you a little too old to be afraid of commitment?"
"ya, bastard—"
it wouldn't take too long for your "situationship" to spread among other idols and since everyone else was pretty closed off or "careful" it was the gossip of the industry.
about 6 months into whatever you and hongjoong had; you two were alone together in the living room of his dorm, everyone else was out and about, busy tending to their own lives leaving you two were finally alone together. one of the few moments you treasured. you laid comfortably into his chest as you both focused on wonka (timothee ver.) playing on the flat screen tv. hongjoong subconsciously pets your hair every now and then and you nuzzled deeper into his chest but there was a lingering thought in your head that you have been meaning to ask.
"hongjoong-oppa..." you mumble. hongjoong humms in response — you feel the vibration of his voice against your ear that rests just above his chest. you shuffled to look at him, he glances at you, seeing that you're a bit serious, he pauses the movie and he sits up a bit. "...is it still to early to ask what we are?"
hongjoong's expression doesn't change. it makes it hard for you to read him and how he feels about the question you have been too scared to ask these past few weeks. hongjoong doesn't respond however, just looking at you with clueless eyes. you sigh, expressing your disappointment and gently push him back into his position on the couch and laid back on top of him.
"nevermind." you murmur. you don't wanna force him into rushing the relationship or do anything he's uncomfortable with, but you don't want to wait too long either. shouldn't the two of you always be on the same page? you sigh again the more you thought about it, but your thoughts were interrupted as soon as hongjoong pushed you back up into your position.
"no," he simply said. "it's not too soon. in fact, it's a little late." he began and you started listening to him, pout evident on your face. hongjoong takes a deep breath. "the truth is, i have been thinking about this topic... me and some of the members would talk about it, and they kept telling me to "put a label on it," but my response was always that i was too scared." you looked at him, brows furrowed. "i really like you, y/n. it scares me." he whispers.
"...you don't... have to be scared." you say softly.
"i know, i know—" he rubs his forehead and he lets out a deep sigh. "but a label makes it so official, y'know...? "
"i know, oppa, but if our relationship, is not going anywhere then we might as well stop now." you can feel the anger in you bubbling up. "i don't date around, you know. you said yourself that you wanted to see where this would go, it's been months and after everything we've done together, i still can't believe we're not even called boyfriend and girlfriend," you pause to take a breath and calm yourself down. "i don't want to force you anything, but i just, i can't help but think that you don't want to continue this but you're too afraid to tell me. i don't want to wake up tomorrow and you change your mind and decide that you don't want me anymore, i need to propose an ultimatum." you pause, licking your lips nervously. "if you don't want to be my boyfriend now then maybe you shouldn't be my boyfriend at all."
you rambled on like you usually do, but hongjoong doesn't want to interrupt you, he never wanted to, he loves listening to you talk, but hearing the words that came out of your mouth upset him.
"...y/n, don't get me wrong," he began. "i want to be your boyfriend and i want you to be my girlfriend, i want a label, but you have to understand that it's hard for me..." he explained calmly, voice soft.
his words don't change how you feel, and you frown. "then why? what are you waiting for—? " your words are interrupted when you feel his lips smash into yours in a soft and wet kiss, it's almost aggressive but eventually, it melts into a tender, passionate connection before pulling away. you look at hongjoong, a little dazed but befuddled. that was the last thing you expected but somehow it calmed your nerves, unlike his words. you look away from him as a blush creeps into your face — that was your first ever kiss with him. "why'd you do that..? "
"because, y/n," hongjoong softly squishes your cheeks and guides you to look into his eyes. "you're beautiful. not just physically — your personality is beautiful, your passion is beautiful... you're a wonderful person and i am very lucky to have you." you're glad that you're looking at him because you can see the sincerity in his eyes. "...and i love how much you care and i- i know that i am ready to have a label, it's just that i told you... i'm scared... but, i guess, we don't always jump into things prepared..." he says and your expression softens. you wrap your arms around his neck and pull him just a little bit closer. "y/n... can i be your boyfriend?" he asks softly.
"of course. what's wrong with you?" you playfully hit his chest and pull him into another short kiss. "i literally had a breakdown about the fact that you didn't wanna be my boyfriend and you're still asking me if i want you to be my boyfriend?" you laugh, hongjoong leans in, another small kiss.
"ya, don't tease me." he mumbles against your lips and you smile mischievously.
"or what~?" you ask, suggestively tilting your head as you look into his gorgeous eyes. hongjoong simply chuckles at your boldness and pecks your cheek, pulling you in for a proper hug and he whispers in your ear.
"don't push it," you were shocked at how deep his voice became. "i might not be able to contain myself..." he says casually and lays back down as if he didn't just leave you wet. "...right, let's continue the movie." he grabs the remote from the table and unpauses it. you just sit there, high and dry.
it's been a year since you and hongjoong have been together, fans are still unaware but catch on to random hints and slip-ups here and there but usually they are too far fetched to be considered a "soft launch" (like you accidentally calling hongjoong "oppa" on a livestream), and only ateez and DESTINY know that your relationship is official official (even your managers don't know, which made it super difficult to go on dates.)
their reactions include but are not limited to:
"finally. you two were beginning to be insufferable..." — DESTINY
"NO WAYYY!?!? THAT'S SO GREAT!!!" — Ateez
"oppaaa!" you yell loudly as you enter the dance studio hongjoong and a few of his members were practicing in. it was late at night and not many people were in the building at the time, you ran over to him and jumped in his arms.
"hi, baby! what are you doing here so late?" he kisses your cheek as he carries you by your thighs against him and you look into his eyes.
"why? can't i see my baby while he's working? " your arms are wrapped around his neck and you kiss his nose, he smiles and scrunches his nose, nuzzling it into yours like a rabbit.
"ahh, come on, you know you're my baby!" he says in a sweet aegyo voice and you giggle. he puts you down and seonghwa walks by.
"come on guys, seriously, i think i might barf..."
"i know, 'oppa, you're my baby, not just that — i want your babies~'" san decides to join in and mock you two with a skit and feigning a high pitched voice. pretending to be you and that seonghwa was hongjoong, playfully hitting his chest.
"ya, stop that, you weirdo—" seonghwa chuckles and hits san back.
you both ignore them, already used to their antics. you hold hongjoong's hands, looking into his eyes. "oppa, wanna go get a snack?"
"totally! let's go." he lets go of your left hand and holds on to your right as he leads you out the dancing studio and into the corridor. "so, where are we going?"
"what? why would i know? i thought you knew." you say, dumbfounded.
"why should i know? you're the one who suggested that we go out for a snack!" he exclaims.
"okay, okay! sooo... let's just go back to the dancing studio? " you turn around and hongjoong pauses, his smile remains the same.
"...actually, i have something else in mind." his voice is soft yet deep — you tilt your head in curiosity as he leads you to the end of the corridor and to the elevators, clicking the down button.
"...soo, are you going to tell me or..?"
"let's hang out in my studio."
this was undeniably the smartest idea Hongjoong had come up with since the beginning of your relationship (considering your surprise). it was incredibly rare for the two of you to get some precious alone time together, so you vowed to savor every single moment. laying on the couch in your favorite position (with you comfortably sprawled on top of him), a soothing silence enveloped the room, where the sound of your synchronized breathing patterns filled the air.
"'joong," you mumble, almost falling asleep, eyes closed. you shift on top of him and feel something rather peculiar down there. your eyes shot wide open. "'joong?!" you playfully hit his chest and sit up. "ya, i thought we were just chilling!"
"sorry! sorry- i couldn't help it, you were positioned so-" he pauses, staring at you as you urged him to continue with a smile and furrowed brows. "nevermind, nevermind, lay back down. it's chill, i promise."
"no," you suddenly say.
"no???" hongjoong questions. "wh- what do you mean?" he tries to laugh it off.
"i mean no, you said it was my fault. i have to help you," you innocently said and slid off of him, going on your knees on the floor.
"woah, woah, woah, wait- no, y/n, i can't let you do that," hongjoong attempts to pull you back up, but you refuse, your hands rest on his thighs, looking up at him with sparkling eyes, eagerly waiting for him to say yes. it's difficult for hongjoong to say no to that expression, he curses under his breath, throwing his head back and closing his eyes. "ahh, shit." he grumbles. "have you ever even sucked a dick, y/n?" he looks down at you, and you shake your head.
"no," you innocently respond. "but i can learn with you right? it's difficult for me to have a sex life, y'know, with our schedules and all."
"yeah, yeah…" he looks away, hand covering the flush of his cheeks.
"…wait," you suddenly stood up. "is this your way of telling me you've been sucked off before?"
"was that your way of telling me you've never been fucked before?" hongjoong quipped.
"is that your other way of telling me you've fucked someone else before?!" you shot back.
he chuckles, "c'mon, baby, this is a good thing!" he runs his hands up and down your arms, attempting to soothe your annoyance, although he's not quite sure whether you're joking or serious. "i could teach you a thing or two, you know? how does that sound, sweetheart?" he stands up and spins around, gently guiding you to sit on the couch with him. despite your earlier irritation, you can't help but giggle as he showers your face with kisses, eventually kissing your lips and coaxing you to lay down on the couch as the make-out session intensifies. he climbs on top of you, grinding his hips into yours, you whine into his kiss. "you like that?" hongjoong mumbles in between kisses, abruptly pulling away to rid of his clothing, prompting you to get rid of yours.
you were practically drooling over his cock, already waiting for him to trace it to your entrance as he wrapped his hand tightly around himself, but he didn't. instead, he leaned back on the other end of the couch, head thrown back as he pumped himself hard. as much as you were disappointed, you gotta say, what a fucking sight. the kim hongjoong was masturbating in front of you, to you. eager, you leaned forward and wrapped your hands around his hand that pumped his cock, wanting to make his job easier, hongjoong stared at you blankly for a moment, considering what he should let you do, slowly, he guided your hands to wrap around his thick girth, urging you to pump up and down, occassionally squeezing at the tip, watching as his precum escaped.
"fuck," hongjoong cursed under his breath. "ah, shit, shit, wait," he pulled your hands off of him. concerned you might've hurt him or done a bad job, you pulled away and watched as he ran a hand through his hair. "sorry, i was just so close to cumming." he mumbled, covering his face with both hands in shame.
you tilt your head, confused. "that's a good thing, though."
"no, no, i wanna make you cum first, baby…" his hand met your cheek, stroking it gently. "you want my tongue or fingers?"
"mmh, cock…" you mumbled, laying on your back and spreading your legs, showing your pretty, tight hole on fully display for him to use. "i want your cock, hongjoong…"
"fuck," hongjoong cllimbed over you and eagerly placed his tip at your entrance. who the hell was he to say no to his innocent baby? he stuck two fingers inside you, collectine some of your arousal to wrap around his cock as lubrication, "fuck, will you be able to take me?" he slowly pushed his tip inside, already struggling as your poor pussy hole fluttered around him. "baby, i don't think it'll fit-" he almost laughed.
"it'll fit!" you whined, grabbing his bare forearms. "i've fingered myself thinking about this moment many times, baby, it'll fit, make it fit, please, i want this, rip me apart, baby-"
slowly, hongjoong bottomed out inside you. the stretch stinging you — he almost came at your mere words and he didn't want to hear another second of it, so he patiently settled inside you for a moment, letting you get used to the sensation before he couldn't take it anymore. he might accidently cum inside you with the way your tight virgin hole squeezed around his long, fat cock. his pace started off slow, he pulled out at his tip before harshly slamming back inside you. you whined. "j-joong," you blubbered. "not too hard."
"okay, baby, i'm sorry," hongjoong leaned down, placing a kiss on your lips before slamming back inside you, slowly and gently. he set the vanilla pace. fuck, fuck, fuck, he was fucking you so good. you hated the thought that he had done this with other girls, but then again, if he didn't then he probably wouldn't have had the skill to fuck you like this right now.
"aah- faster," you whined and hongjoong complied, wanting nothing but to please you, to make your first time memorable. he thrust harder into you, his cock hitting your sweet spot you never even knew existed. "aah! ahhh~!" you involuntarily whined, you had never felt so good in your life, you never felt this before, the desire to reach your climax and the desire to never want this feeling to end. "i-i'm cumming, 'joong-" you whined as he fucked harder into you, abrupt thrusts, his head rested in the crook of your neck, letting out soft groans, his warm breath against your skin.
"cum for me, baby, that's right," he groaned as you squeezed tightly around him, creaming around his cock. "fuck, fuck, that's right baby…" he whispered, reaching his climax as well and painting your insides whiter than they have ever been.
"mmng…" you moaned, you couldn't get a word out even if you wanted to. too fucked out to form a coherent thought, hongjoong stayed inside of you until he softened. he pulled out, placing a kiss on your lips and nose.
"fuck, you took me so well, baby, you know that?" he made his way to face your pussy and began pushing the cum back inside your small hole. "mmh, your first time, you had a creampie? what a dirty slut you are, hmm?" he whispered, kissing the inside of your thigh before grabbing your discarded panties from the floor and sliding it back up your legs. all you could let out was a helpless whine, hongjoong dressed himself up, climbing into the couch wiht you, cuddling your naked, fucked out form into his fully clothed one. "sleep, baby, i'll clean you up at my dorm tomorrow, m'kay?"
"y'sure..?"
"yes, baby, don't worry."
#ateez#hongjoong#ateez hongjoong#kim hongjoong#KIM HONGJOONG.#idol#hongjoong x reader#ateez x reader#kim hongjoong x reader#hongjoong x idol!reader#ateez crack#ateez drabble#hongjoong x reader crack#idol reader#에이티즈#에이티즈 홍중#ateez smut#ateez fanfic#ateez fanfiction#hongjoong smut#kim hongjoong smut#auth. zuzu#hongjoong x you#hongjoong x y/n#fucking kim hongjoong
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Can we have some of ur mouthwashing headcanons for the tulpar crew? (Can be about anything btw) The brain worms are getting hungry again I fear… 😞
-ig ill be 🪷 anon if it’s not taken yet?
HELLOOO BABYYYY sorry this took so long i was dying bc of my finals </3 but anyways welcome 🪷 anon to the family!!!!!! these hcs ended up so unserious LOL
the crew got banned from playing uno after anya nearly flipped the table when daisuke put down like five +4 cards in a row now they just stick to sorry!
swansea hums to himself when he's working, it's usually like old songs but recently daisuke's pop songs have been getting stuck in his head. (i think it would be unbelievably funny if swansea starts singing like the brainrot versions of songs js bc daisuke keeps playing them. yk like the 'oh the weather outside is rizzy, and the fire is so skibidi' LMAOSKJDSK
daisuke doesn't really have a specific music taste, he listens to a mix of everything. doesn't know how to answer when people ask him what his fave genre is so he tries to act cool and says he only listens to rap music.
anya had a wattpad phase. i can't explain further i can just FEEL it.
curly is actually a decent dancer. his mom sent him for dance classes as a kid and he has a good sense of rhythm. jimmy makes fun of him for this though so he doesn't ever mention it.
jimmy has rewatched american psycho probably more than 117 times. he watches it and he's like:
(i am currently watching + reading it for the first time and patrick bateman is literally jimmy to me.) more content utc!
anya is terrible in the kitchen. like seriously do Not let her in there or the house will burn down just from her boiling water or smth. it's okay tho i will be her housewife <3 (i can't cook either) she is also very good at tetris for some reason. she's a little forgetful so she usually writes things that she needs to remember on the back of her hands but by the end of the day they're all smudged smh. but also she always has perfect nails!
curly is one of those guys who's just naturally good at things. yk when people are like 'oh yeah i never practice' and it pisses you off? he's one of those guys. ik ppl say he's british but he's so american to me??? he was definitely the jock in highschool that every girl crushed on but he never even realised.
swansea is a dog person. he's chill w cats but he definitely prefers dogs. he likes how loyal they are, and i can see him having a massive dog like a st bernard at home waiting for him. but if his kids ever brought back a kitten or smth he'd be the one to be all 'you guys better take care of it bc i won't' but then you see him becoming besties with the cat LOL.
daisuke LOVES the beach. literally a water baby. he's very good at surfing, and always ends up with a tan that makes him look even more handsome bc it compliments his dyed hair so nicely. i think that he grew up in a big family w lots of cousins around where he would be one of the older kids, so he's very good w children as well. he somehow knows the best way to entertain them and keep them out of trouble. (primary school art teacher daisuke are you guys seeing my vision?!?!?!)
jimmy gets nightmares and thus has difficulty sleeping. he lies whenever curly asks him about it but those dark circles say otherwise. this might be random but i also think he's good at singing. in another world he could have been a sleazy rockstar but instead he went to space. are u guys seeing the visual of jimmy laying back in bed strumming his banged-up electric guitar... i hate this mf.
anyways that's all for now! i had a lot of fun w these hehe <3 hope you liked them!
#( mouthwashing )#mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#[ into the yuzuvrse ]#[ webmail ]#:: 🪷 anon#jimmy mw#curly mw#anya mw#swansea mw#daisuke mw
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Skz reaction to their s/o listening to angry music
Pairing: ot8 skz × gn!Reader (individually)
Genre: I'm pretty sure this is fluff
Request: "i was wondering if u could write like a reaction of skz when they find out that yn is listening to angry music (metal, rage rap,..)"
A/N: I AM SO LATE with this request, I'm so so sorry😭 it took me a while to figure out how i wanted to write this but I hope you like it nevertheless! Also first time I use dividers and I think it's so cute (credits in the end of the post)
Bang Chan
I think he would be so surprised?? Mainly if your music taste doesn't match your appearance
Like imagine you wear such soft clothes and then you're listening to rage in your headphones
He would be tempted to make more songs like this to stray kids though
And would ask for your opinion ofc, might even put your name in the credits
Will also send tiktoks he finds about angry music all the time
And if he ever gets to know one of your favourite artists (this man knows the whole entertainment industry atp) he will let you know and might even bring you an autograph
Lee Know
He would find out your music taste when you guys made one of those matchings in spotify
He swore you guys would be more than 90% compatible
you were only 34%
he is in shock
But he listens to every single song that shows up on the matching
Might even add some to his favourites
Will let you know his opinions too
And if another member likes angry music as well, he will mention you in the conversation
He might even use this as a way to bring you closer to the members
His s/o and his best friends, he would love that
Changbin
If you like angry rap he is now taking notes lmao
Will try to incorporate it in his own rap
Takes you to concerts!!
Buy you merch!!
Tries to meet with your favourite artists!!
Makes angry music for skz!!
Will do everything and anything when it comes to your likings, including musical taste
And he would add angry music in your karaoke nights
He is screaming from the top of his lungs into the mic but he is so happy lol
Please scream with him, thank you
Hyunjin
I feel like he always knew that
It was probably one of the first things he knew about you
And even though he might not like this musical genre personally, he will probably listen to it sometimes and will have some of your songs in his playlist
But he likes it the most when he is driving and you play one of your playlists on the radio
When you sing along>>
And!!
If you know the story behind one of the artists/songs PLEASE tell him
He would love to listen to you explain it to him
Han
You can't convince me that this man doesn't have some songs like that in his playlist as well
He goes to the gym listening to the most agressive songs ever
So he actually is pretty happy you guys have something else in common
And if you guys like the same artist or the same song, he is in heaven
Specially if it's metal
Nothing will change my mind, he listens to metal a lot
And agressive rap
Will also incorporate to his rap sometimes and maybe will even put some references to your favourite artists on the lyrics
Will add a lot of your recommendations to his playlist
Felix
Tried to do a matching on spotify as well and was in shock with how many metal and rap was there
Asks you to make a playlist for him recommending some songs
Will show your recs to the members as well
Suddenly all the dorm is listening to metal
And if you ever think that his voice could match one of your favourites songs, he would be so honoured fr
Like, you're making an association between a thing that you love and him, he is so genuinely happy
Will try to sing it ofc
Seungmin
He is other one who I think will probably not like the genre that much
But will listen to it whenever you listen to it
He really likes to share an earphone with you
If you're up to it, so is he
And also likes to pick which song you're listening to
Will make a whole queue for you to listen
And if he ever comes across to another angry music, he is sending it to you immediately
I.N
Now that they have personal instagram accounts (I'm so happy lmao) he will post a picture on his stories and will let you choose the song
So he is wearing the cutest outfit but rage is playing on the background
He finds it pretty cool ngl
And since we're talking about fashion
He would love to see how your musical taste reflects on your clothes, if it does
It's so interesting he swears
He would also spoil you with merch and concerts
I believe he would try to listen to some angry music to try to impress you lmao
Like you'd be listening to some music and somehow he knows the artist, the album and even the release date
Pretend you didn't see him search everything on google
Feedback and reblogs are always appreciated!
Dividers by @cafekitsune (thank you btw!)
#this was kinda hard but so so fun to make!#hope you liked#skz fluff#stray kids soft thoughts#stray kids#stray kids soft hours#skz x reader#stray kids fluff#skz#skz x you#stray kids x reader#skz drabble#skz fic#skz fanfic#skz reactions#skz imagine#skz headcanon#bang chan#seungmin#i.n#han#hyunjin#lee know#felix#changbin#kim seungmin#seo changbin#lee minho#lee felix#han jisung
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What's your favourite vat7k headcannons for each character (or character[s] of your choosing)?
Teeheehehe. So glad you asked BUCKLE UP! *unrolls a massive scroll*
Most of my head cannons I've talked abt already but a few stored away.
I always mean to talk abt this but I keep forgetting lol so I'ma dump it here. Bands/ singers I think vat7k crew would listen to.
Hugo: I feel like Hugo is the type of person to listen to everything except pop music (ofc he'll make an exception for Chappelle Roan tho). But some bands/singers I think he would listen to would be will wood, bo Burnham, Ayesha erotica, sir mix a lot ,Remo drive, the front bottoms and of course the goddess herself Mitski.
Varian: I don't rlly know how to explain his music taste but I think he would listen to The Crane wives, Florence + the machine, big thief, Kate bush, the Dresden dolls, mother mother, cave town, Alex g, pavement and probably just a lot of older rock bands. (I do think he's a sucker for musicals tho)
Nuru: I wish I could say Nuru has some cool underground music taste but if I'm being honest she prob listens to whatever female pop singer she hears on the radio. But here's a list anyways. Chappelle Roan, Gigi Perez, Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, Rihanna. But I do think she would listen to a little bit of punk. Bands like Dazey and the scouts, destroy boys, mommy long legs, Paramore, the all American rejects (u could argue that some of them aren't actually punk but who cares) there is this one singer I really like Ūla her songs feel really Nuru coded
Yong: honestly I don't know. Yong is a twelve year old boy. I do not understand twelve year olds.
Donella: doesn't care for music but if she has to tolerate it she'd rather it be something classic.
Cyrus: likes to act like he doesn't like music but secretly enjoys a bit of Mitski with Hugo or Taylor Swift.
Eugene: I think Eugene would be into rock classics but does enjoy a bit of Taylor Swift.
Rapunzel: I'm not completely sure but I feel Raps is willing to listen to anything after gothel but has become a swiftie due to Eugene.
Cass: Anything angry. Heavy metal, Punk, maybe some rap? But she does enjoy a bit of her depressed lesbian music every now and again (Mitski)
I was gonna add more head cannons but this is already longer than I thought lol. Thanks for the question wishing you a very good whatever season it is where you are (summer sucks rn lol) Make sure you eat and have some water <333
#vat7k#varian and the seven kingdoms#varian vat7k#hugo vat7k#nuru vat7k#yong vat7k#eugene fitzherbert#tangled rapunzel#cassandra tts#i meant to respond sonner but i kept getting distracted lol#<333
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ive been turning these 2 around in my mind so so much lately... id like to share why i like them, so ill do so under cut :)
what draws them together? both of their traumas are part of them. neither of them are going to 'get better' in the expected way. they can learn to cope with their struggles, possibly get medications to help with that, but that's it. theyre similar in many things ('their trauma isnt leaving', both are suicidal "feeling suicidal/i wish i wasnt alive" "i should actually just die id be doing everyone a favor LOL"), neither like who they are as people "all the pretty girls make me not wanna be me" "do u know what thats like? being someone you wouldnt want to know?") and both of their songs are about their relationships with other people, even if its not the main theme
weevildoing said this about disposable girl. with chemical girl, its more obvious
this gives them both a deeper understanding of each other !! even though their traumas are still different, theyve got this similarity. they could talk about that, relate to each other, etc...
another thing that draws them together: their interests, id say! she was a skater girl she was a fitness girl, can i make it any more obvious... most of their hobbies arent the exact same, but they are at least in a similar vein id say - anime and gundam, skating and fitness, rap and megan thee stallion. they could easily enjoy each other's interest, i think!:)
what stands in the way? misunderstanding and miscommunication. i think that (when theyre first getting to know each other, at least) disposable wouldnt stand up for herself/tell chemical when shes uncomfortable/when chemical says something that upsets her ("being mistreated would at least mean im real" "that at least means youre someone that they wanna be around"). she'd feel like voicing these things would cost her her and chemical's relationship. i also feel like she wouldnt see this as something worth communicating, possibly
thatd be a problem in all relationships ofc, but itd upset chemical girl especially. she has a hard time forming relationships ("i wouldnt want to be around me either. do u know what thats like? being someone you wouldnt want to know?"). she pushes others away so that she cant hurt them ("theres no point in getting close, leave me alone"). i think that if she and disposable got close, and she found out that it isnt communicating its feelings, shed be upset !! yknow ?? thinking that youve finally found a friend that likes you as you are, when in reality ur just hurting them with everything that you say... getting close to someone for the first time in forever, opening up, just to find that out would probs frustrate her
have an example of smth that i think that would happen when theyre first getting to know each other
i think they'd communicate this eventually tho:) yay yippee! im communication and im understanding🏳️🌈the girlfriends
what are their good traits? they want to be there for each other, to help each other grow, to understand one another!! like in "what draws them together?", they understand each other more than the average person. they could help each other accept this - like, its easier to accept people for things that you beat yourself up about, yknow? were more strict with ourselves than other people, its easier to deem someone else as deserving of love than yourself, etc etc... since theyre similar in many things, they could learn to love themselves while they start to love each other !! i hope that makes sense..
them sharing hobbies would be SOOO so cute!!! chemical teaching disposable fitness so that she has an outlet for her frustration, disposable teaching chemical how to skate... chemical showing it gundam, her figurine collection, disposable showing her anime, them listening to rap together.... it would be so cute !!!!! i think disposable would enjoy fitness, but would be embarassed by being bad at it/being slow/sweating a lot/etc. chemical would be cheering her on, proud of her for the smallest improvements... likewise, i think chemical would suck at skating. steps on the skateboard and it explodes. u know how it is
what makes them hopeless at romance? ARGHHH "what to do, when everybody that ive loved has only up and left me?" "im alwasy left out of everything" "nobody fuckinf wants me" vs "theres no point in getting close, leave me alone" "i dont think you should come by my place tonight" "nobody can keep up with me"... need i say more...
i think they should latch onto each other like leeches and never let go
thank you if youve read this far:) theyre so everything to me !!!! theyre sooo... god... shaking them!!!! arghrrrr!!! chemwaste!!! save me chemwaste!!!
(both of these poses are from mellon_soup)
#mystuff#tptm#the post traumatic manifesto#disposable girl#chemical girl#shipping#tptm chemwaste#💣chemical girl💣#🗑disposable girl🗑#myart#fanart#💣chemwaste🗑
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☠◉☠◉☠◉☠◉☠◉☠◉☠◉☠◉☠◉☠◉☠◉☠◉
¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸♪·¯·♫¸¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸♪·¯·♫¸¸
♫♪.ılılıll|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|̲̅̅=̲̅̅|̲̅̅●̲̅̅|llılılı.♫♪
➤; ᴡᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜɪs ʙʟᴏɢ.↶
⬆︎ made by : @rainydayzxd , my beautiful child and best friend
Tws for my blog : mention of $h, mentions of fighting , a lot of venting bcuz I hate my life, cigarettes, uh strict parents and they're shitty asf, past shit that still haunts me, swearing, sometimes me being hard on myself, I do not post $h pics.
NO CREEPS, PEOPLE OVER THE AGE OF 20 I AM A MINOR AND I'M NOT LOOKING FOR ANYTHING LIKE THAT (ifykwim) (exeptions for ppl w alters, and age regression but like.. U turn into adult idk how to explain. )
TW FOR UNDER READ-THINGY, GIFS, WEIRD GORE BAND NAMES, also I'm sorry if the colors above r triggerringg, I'm coloring so it's noticeable (the tws)
...tw, please don't tell me I didn't warn u.
Fucking welcome !! Have a drink 🤘
This profile ain't a vent one even though most of the time I complain and whine on here, I'm actually really nice if you interact with me, ask @rainydayzxd . (They're my child and my baby I'll protect them at all costs) I often pet regress, so like..please don't be weird. Only *REALLY* close moots can call me pup,..( @agirlfr0msomewhere @rainydayzxd @raytorosguitarstrap @s1l4s-w0rsh1ps-t0m4t03s @jordanikeepforgettingtheurl... if anyone else calls me pup and I don't trust them...like..tell them.).
I suffer with $h, I find it hard to find anything i deserve in this world, I don't post $h pics, if there's a post I didn't tag (like a tw) please DM or send me an ask, I'm trying my best to have a safe spot people can interact with.
↑↑↑↑ me
RULES FOR MY ASKS: NO bullying, like plz, no asks for donations (honestly, hard to know if ur a bot or not.) , rants about stuff are encouraged, no political shit, no weird questions about me, yk stuff like that.
If you DM me, please do not spam me, makes me overwhelmed.
best ffriends on Tumblr! : @agirlfr0msomewhere @rainydayzxd @deliu07 @kornyblu @dazaissceneslut @raytorosguitarstrap @s1l4s-w0rsh1ps-t0m4t03s
Hallo !! I'm looking 4 friendz, here iz my info dump
My name is Ezra !! Ftm dude and I go by he him
I'm Romanian , yet idk shit abt Romania, or do the whole "tradition" thing,
I am currently a caregiver, if you're looking for some kind of comfort, feel free to ask! (Caregiver for Jordan !! ):3
Spacehey: https://spacehey.com/hazyeyesez
➤ Music Genre
➤ Emo rock, Death Metal, Nu metal, Goregrind, Sometimes metal core, Power Metal, Glam metal, Black Metal yesssrrrrriririr(Yes I'm a metal head)
➤ Artists and Bands
KoRn , Green Day , Weezer, Tokio Hotel, Mitski, Eminem, Esophagus, Steve Gabry, Your Favorite Martian, The Smiths, Epic Rap Battles Of History, Pink Floyd, BabyMetal, Gorillaz, The Strokes, LMFAO, Arctic Monkeys, JT Music, IC3SPEAK, My Chemical Romance, Metallica, Anal Vomit, System of a down, Slayer, Slave steel, Mortician, Slipknot, The Anxiety, Darkthrone, Burzum, BABYMETAL.
Here's my playlist! There's more than 100 songs that only show, uh, yeah.
Trigger warning, weird gore names.
➤ Fandoms : Call Of Duty, Cry Of Fear, My Little Pony, The Walking Dead, Shameless, Deathgasm, Sally face, Err can't really thing of anything else man.
➤ Moviez : Fight club, The virgin suicides, FNAF Movie, The Mario movie, Coraline, Studio Ghibli movies, Deathgasm , All Fred Figglehorn movies, Dinner in America.
➤ Fave colorz : Green , a lot of green,red and of course, the best shade ever, Black
➤ Favorite pony from main 6 : applejack
➤ Favorite pony from all series: BIGMAC💗💗
➤ Favorite sanrio : pompompurin he's so me
➤ Favorite Twd character : Carl (i cosplay him!!!) And / or Beth (and many more lol!!)
➤ Favorite Sally face character : Travis Phelps (he's so relatable) (yes I have daddy issues)
➤ Favorite people : @agirlfr0msomewhere, @0r1sw0rldxp, @kornyblu, @s1l4s-w0rsh1ps-t0m4t03s, , @rainydayzxd, @sincerely-jordan-tuck, @deliu07 (STOP CHANGING UR USER NAME SM JORDAN I CAN'T KEEP UP WITH EDITINF THE LIST /pos /j! I luv u change ur username I love ur creativity with em :3)
LOVE MY OTHER MOOTS 2!!!
DNI: - homophobia, racism, sexism, anti furry, anti therian, over 20 , people who want donations, I don't have money, plus I have nothing to do to help. all bad stuff etc. I BLOCK FREELY.
Everyone else is welcome !!<3
I like to think that I'm kind and caring,i love taking care of people, so yes slide in my DMS if u're lonely,im always down to make new moots and friends on here !
➤ My tags !! :
Ezras' food !! ➥ what I ate
Ezras' art !! ➥ my art and drawings
Ezras' outfit !! ➥ what I'm wearing that day
Ezras' day !! ➥ rants about my day
Ezras' vent !! ➥ my vents
Ezras' interests !! ➥ rants about my interests
Ezras' friends !! ➥rants about my friends
Ezras' embarrassing facts !! ➥ My embarrassing facts I'm scared to talk about so I post them on my Tumblr blog!
I might add more in the future !!
Also have tags like "Silas tag !!" Where it's a post or a reblog of my friend or moot !!
Gifs & blinkies are not mine !! (I think that is want they're called
Recently started playing guitar ! fucking metal yes yes
Favorite number: 29
Favorite letter: G L E M A
Oc blogs :
RirI Austerlitz: @cannibal-unicorn-ssssss
2025 new years resolutions
- kiss my girlfriend everyday for the whole year
- get a binder
- get better at making comics writing storie
- get better at guitar
- get slimmer (belly and thighs)
- decorate room
- finish my battle vest
- get rid of acne
- get better at school
- cherish my gf a lot
#ezras' interests !!#ezras' moots !!#ezras' friends !!#ezras' day !!#ezras' food !!#ezras' vent !!#ezras' embarrassing facts !!#ezras' art !!#ezras' outfits !!#Spotify
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Thoughts on Hugo & Varian as Odysseus + Penelope from Epic The Musical? (Not directly, but like, their songs at least. Especially "Would you fall in love with me again?") I APOLOGIZE FOR LONG INFODUMP </3 Like, which ones do you think would fit who? Imo, I believe both fit either side really well. Varian as Ody is basically him doing all the bad things he did in Corona and asking Hugo if he'll forgive him and love him, because at the time, he thought he had no choice but to do those things. Hugo never cared about what Varian did that deeply because he had his own qualms too, he was fine with waiting for him because he wasn't a monster, he was just a boy who was hurt. He was, and is, just Varian. They're both beautiful yet broken and Hugo's gonna help pick up those pieces. The "bow" that people would use for suitors is actually just a giant machine that one of them broke and if they're gonna get married to someone other than each other, then at least they can find a mechanically competent partner LOL (This goes both ways, no matter who is Ody or Penelope, thought I think it'd be fun if Hugo was Penelope, the bow would be switched out for a gun he made that nobody knew how it worked) Yet, imagine Varian as Penelope in a way. He's already gone through all of that pain before, he's just been waiting for love to find him. Waiting for Hugo. Hugo in "Would you fall in love with me again?" asking Varian if he'd still love him even if he made mistakes, did horrible things, things that he thought nobody would accept him doing even though he had no choice. Like growing up on the streets or doing dirty work for Donella. There was an inherent pyramid and where he stood was not high enough. I think Varian in Penelope's position would be exhausted (lovingly) waiting for Hugo for so long only for him to go "Would u still love me if I maybe did these bad things and there's POSSIBLYYY blood on my hands?? :c" to THE ALCHEMIST WHO RAMPAGED ACROSS CORONA FOR HIS DAD'S SAFETY!! Like... he knows what it's like to do that Hugo. Probs worse. You'll be okay.. <3 It would also be a fun parallel for Varian & Cass tbh. If he was Penelope he'd be waiting in a similar fashion to Cass. They're tired of waiting for something they want, they want it now, but it's just not possible unless something magICAL happens. Either way, they'll do what they need to do to keep it in their favor. For love or not. And finally, mildly unrelated topic, if we're taking the whole storyline out of context for Epic & just picking a song that fits them- Ofc "Would you fall in love with me again?" would be the Varigo song, but I ALSO PROPOSEEEE Varian & Cassandra's song to be "We'll Be Fine" with Cass as Athena talking about Raps & Varian as Telemachus. THAT IS ALL TY FOR READING!!
OH MY GOSH PLEASE DONT APOLOGIZE FOR THE LONG POST, THIS IS STELLAR OMG IT'S SUCH A PEAK DEEP DIVE AAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE SCRUMPTIOUS FOOD AND SHARING IT WITH ME!!
Both alternate takes on the odysseus/penelope: varigo roles is so good!! And the talking points on why the roles can really work both ways is spot on!!
I think what's so fascinating about varigo's dynamic when it came to their misdeeds is how Hugo had stopped thinking too much about the crimes he committed because he grew up in an environment where everyone does it (to survive) hence it comes off like it's just a normal activity (that prbbly is not anywhere else) among ingvarrians (who are less fortunate) meanwhile Varian thinks about his a lot, like a constant shadow of his past that never left him and will constantly follow him no matter what path he takes in life.
So when Hugo begun to care for Varian... when Varian's opinions and how he sees him begun to matter to him—that's when he suddenly starts to genuinely reflect on his own past actions—because he wants to be good for Varian, wants to be someone worthy of his love, wants to be someone Varian deserves, wants to do better for Varian. But to Varian, he is good enough as he is, as just Hugo.
And when Varian confesses about his past, he still expects a shift to their relationship because he's afraid, afraid that he wont be accepted fully for both the good and the bad sides of himself. But Hugo doesn't let that change the way he thinks of him—because its all in the past, and he understands, like truly he gets it. And he is set on making sure Varian knows that, that he'll still love him all the same. Cuz like you said, he never saw him as a monster, he's just Varian—the silly, clumsy-prone, passionate, brilliant and kind person he came to know.
And they'll embrace each other wholeheartedly for who they are and it's just aghhh, god gay ppl man !! i cant stand them!! /VPOS
ALSO ouuughh the challenge being "figure out how this complicated mechanism that I created works" is just genius!! Like PLEEEASE they fucking would !! Its smart, its sneaky, its such a subtle way to say "fuck you im waiting for the love of my life to come back and thats not yall" and its so them-coded behavior, eating it up so hard
(and the We'll Be Fine as a Cass/Varian song is pretty fitting as well yeh! I can totally see that, I see the vision!)
#daske ask#anonymous#answered#more 7k character driven deep dive posts are pouring in these days#ohhh WE ARE SO BACK VAT7K NATION!!#and anon dont be worry!! such a well thought out discussion like this is most welcomed in my inbox!#keep em comin if you have more deep thoughts about these sillies!
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how i imagine bully characters as modern day teenagers 👍🏼
plz note that some of these aren’t really realistic— i got everything off of pinterest so don’t lynch me plz
jimmy hopkins :
even though he’s canonically ginger, he’d probably like bleaching his hair since it’s been popular in 2020’s and current year ( ignore that he doesn’t have freckles in the pic )
what he’d wear :
classic skater boy y2k style, id like to imagine that he owns different types of skateboards and then hangs them up on his wall in his bedroom,
hence shifting to his bedroom would be like :
this is what you’d get when he’d actually clean his room for a change /j
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
gary smith :
if we’re gonna be blunt, he’d probably be the type to post one of those cheesy ass thrust trap videos ( for his ego boost, of course )
and then it’d get three likes.
i tried finding one that actually had a scar over his eye but i couldn’t 😔
what he’d wear :
posting up with the death note ahh fit ( oh, yeah, he’d like some forms of anime but would NEVER admit it to jimmy or pete )
his bedroom :
20 million posters on the wall thanks to his ADD and autism ( argue with the wall lol ) he’d keep his room decently clean, but then never care to find his medicine in there unless if pete forces him to take it for once, and peak the one pillow on his bed
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
pete kowalski :
this is a more fanon outlook since a lot of people draw him as mixed / african american, so we’re just gonna go with this 👍🏼
what he’d wear :
the boys a dork, you think he’s gonna dress basic ?
also, I’d like to add that he’d probably be mistaken for being in the nerds clique since he would like to read a lot and have a lot of interests and whatnot
his bedroom :
he’d probably like rap music ( specially tyler, the creator and many other popular rappers )
but, he got a little bit of some OCD so he likes to keep his room super clean and organized or he’d tweak out 😭
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
uhh u put an ask if you want me to do other characters, and i can do ur ocs too— I wouldn’t mind that at all 😊
#bully game#bully rockstar#bully scholarship edition#bully canis canem edit#bully cce#headcanons#jimmy hopkins#gary smith#pete kowalski#modern day#aesthetic
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Got any headcanons for Mattsun?
Omfg haven't thought about this guy in so long. let me cook
sneaks up from behind when you're on your phone, peeks over your shoulder and comments on whatever you're doing/watching. "they're really fucking up that dresser" "is this the episode where he dies" (it isn't. in fact he never dies, issei just wanted to fuck w u)
...snores... LOL
you say you don't know how to do something and he teases you and confidently, casually says Lemme see it. then He ends up scratching his head like What the hell? Like yeah that's what I said /lh
if possible, he likes putting his hand in your back pocket while waiting somewhere 👍
stiff dancer.. your romantic slow dance in the kitchen is hugging and swaying from side to side. but he can spin you and you can spin him so you know. still fun and good!!
tries not to laugh when he sees kids get scared by moving halloween decorations then gets scared himself
tries to rap songs when he's drunk . um. doesn't work out too well most of the time but you know
is shocked by how big horses are the first time he gets close to one
isn't the most confident gift giver.. the first time he's getting you a gift he keeps texting the seijoh 4 gc and questioning everything while they tease him 😭 bro is near sweating when he hands it to you. he gets better though!!
those videos where the person secretly records babying their boyfriend and when he realizes he sits up and tries to Be Cool. yeah. mattsun
#🧾nia.answers#<3 anon#6okuto.txt#lifes easier when i havent done relationship hcs for them so i know i couldnt have said smth before HABFJSBDJ
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Hello hello can you do Dave strider from Homestuck x reader? Jus general head cannons and what not ^^
Sorry if u have like a million other requests 😭😭
i don’t actually have rhat many… im just a hypocrite
DAVE STRIDER <3 READER GENERAL HEADCANONS
no matter how much he insists that he’s so experienced and such a ladies man, like “yeah, ofc i’m dating you! all the big booty bodacious babes love me” he is deeply insecure(shocker)
praise goes a long way.. honestly any type of affection does tbh, he’s starved of it
honestly didn’t expect to actually get with you after all his flirting and he has to remind himself that y’all are actually together and you aren’t messing with him
him outwardly doesn’t change that much, except maybe being a bit more red than usual. he’s still the same insufferable prick he always is
he would use shitty pickup lines ironically *cough* he probably stole them from john *cough cough*
but he can do it cuz he's super cool and ironic
would call your name and poke you for like 5 minutes straight to get your attention just to say "hi;)"
would call you cringe pet names but only if it annoys you..
will make you sit there and listen to his raps and mixtapes and look at everything he makes basically. he wants to impress you!
deathly afraid of seeming cringe to you
would pour his entire heart out to you in a scrambled nervous ramble then just be like "sorry that was cringe lol"
the type to lean against the wall but completely miss the wall
i got another request to finish the beta kids with dave and rose.. so i’ll just do rose for that one
sorry i haven’t posted in a while!!
divider from this post, becuz i couldn't pass it up
...and this is @somberauthor's dave hcs if u want..... i tried rlly hard not to repeat shit too much
#x reader#x reader headcanons#headcanon#homestuck#dave strider#dave strider x reader#dave strider x reader general headcanons#dave strider x reader headcanons#david elizabeth strider#headcanons#ao3#homestuck x reader#hs dave#hs x reader#dave strider homestuck
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