#how are they supposed to know that! and also why the hell not!! squirrels are cute too!!

[blujayonthewing]

are squirrels an actual problem at bird feeders or is everyone just being mean

[drconstellation]

The Ineffable Ducks

What's with all the ducks in Good Omens that Crowley seems to be inordinately fond of? Turns out, they do have a narrative purpose, they're not just in there as a running joke about Crowley's fondness for the animals of Earth.

They appear in both S1 and S2, and get mentioned in several seemingly random places. Like, really random. There are quite a few in St James Park, where the ducks live, where the international spies also clandestinely meet, where Aziraphale and Crowley meet on several occasions, and where Crowley and Shax have a meeting, exchanging information in S2E1.

Ducks also get referred to here, when Aziraphale suggests they use humans to search and spy out the missing Antichrist, but Crowley insists it will be near impossible because suspicion slides off the boy like water off, what ever water slides off, because he has an automatic defense system.

The he remembers the ducks(!) later in the Bentley when they discuss using their respective networks of highly trained human operatives (Shadwell and the Witchfinder army), and Aziraphale asks if Crowley has a better idea than his. "Ducks!" Crowley suddenly utters.

The ducks that are always there, that you see but don't see, gathering bread crumbs, when any kind of surveillance or secret spy work is being discussed.

Nah, I thought, it couldn't be a sly ref to this famous cartoon by Larson, could it?

Aziraphale and Crowley are always afraid that someone is watching, or listening to everything they do, from both sides. I mean isn't that partly why we got the ending we did in S2, because they have had to be so covert with their communication to each over the centuries they've forgotten how to speak plainly to each other?

Heaven has definitely been watching...

And Hell certainly noticed Crowley's act of kindness in the Edinburgh cemetery, swiftly summoning him to Hell for punishment after his kind deed on behalf of Elspeth.

Then when the duo meet in again 1867 Crowley wonders if "ducks have ears" before declaring they must do - that's how they hear other ducks. So its no surprise that when Crowley asks Aziraphale for holy water that he writes the request on a piece of paper to hide it from those invisible ever-present watchers they know are never far away.

When we come to the start of S2, where Crowley is slouched in St James Park once more, reading the Tadfield Advertiser, and yelling at the Azerbaijani secret agents for feeding the ducks bread. Crumbs, it was alright to do this in the book, and S1, why is wrong now? Has Crowley suddenly become woke and caring for the ducks? Nah.

There's a lot more to it than that. I realized this is the missing Grain offering from my post about altar offerings (see The Altar of Eccles Cakes) in S2. A Grain offering represents a voluntary expression of devotion to God - or the other side you're supposed to be aligned with, in this case.

Shax is part of this scene, discussing the latest news from below, and she mentions some special intel that Hell has received, from their own secret squirrel network. Of course they would meet in St James Park to discuss this, along with all the other spies. While Shax tries to get some intel out of Crowley about what might be going on in Heaven, because she knows he has contact with a certain angel who owns a book shop, Crowley responds by refusing to show any devotion to his former side at this point, and isn't going to give any information away that could be useful. He also doesn't have any intel at this point, anyway, but he's not going to give that away either! Heaven and Hell are toxic, and no one should be going anywhere near them, in his opinion. So stop feeding them that devotional bread!

After Shax asks what they should be feeding the ducks, he eventually says "Frozen Peas. It's good for them, they like it."

The short period of "peas" since they stopped the impending Apocalypse has been enjoyable, and good for Crowley and Aziraphale, but the forced meeting with Beelzebub later that day soon jolts Crowley out of any complacency when they indicate that the "generalized understanding" Crowley thought they had with Heaven and Hell after the body swap to leave them alone, the one Aziraphale-as-Crowley negotiated, while asking for a rubber duck, no less, was looking very shaky and fragile indeed.

And one more random duck ref to discuss.

I was inspired to write this section by lalalunamoth's post calling Muriel a duckling imprinted on Crowley, and of course I did not save it, did I, and a search does not bring it back up again (found it!), so if you're reading this, or know that post, please let me know! I read it, and thought, cute, but nah, then realized that Muriel was sent on a surveillance mission to Whickber St to ascertain the truth of Aziraphale's 25 lazurii miracle. And she did act as the eyes of Heaven, writing up some reports, called Crowley "grice," then followed him around during his escapade in Heaven just like a duckling following a grumpy gander drake while he did his own surveillance measures in a Tactical Turtle neck, channeling his best imitation Sean Connery voice (have you noticed that as well, people?)

No, no, the op wasn't wrong - those big cross ducks, er grice geese, they make good guard dogs, no?

With special mention to Crowley acting as a surveillance duck just prior to this, and Mr Brown doing his own "spying out" of Aziraphale.

To finish this meta, there is one other figure who notably offered the ducks bread, in the book. This passage, which is surely relevant to S3, but didn't appear in S1, shows another character still devoted to God in a way. Lets give Death the final word:

Crowley: "Maybe it's it's all part of a great ineffable plan. All of it. You, me, him, everything. Some great big test to see if what you've built all works properly, eh? You start thinking: it can't be a great cosmic game of chess, it has to be just very complicated Solitaire. And don't bother to answer. if we could understand, we wouldn't be us. Because it's all - all - "

INEFFABLE, said the figure feeding the ducks.

"Yeah. Right. Thanks."

[madsblogsstuff]

heaven - joe burrow x reader (pt. 1)

INSPO:

She was innocence. A perfectly painted picture created by only the greatest higher-ups. She was the sheer image of flawless and excellence all wrapped up in a human body, and she was standing right in front of my own two eyes. Y/n Taylor - our Coach, Zac Taylor’s daughter was nothing short of gorgeous. Every-time she smiled or talked had me wanting more, and more. I couldn’t get enough of her. I knew she was destined to be mine. She was heaven on earth.

———————————————————————-

I woke up in my dorm still sore from the football game last night. As much as I love being an LSU Tiger Girl, my body still disagreed with all the intricate dance routines we do for game-days. Just something I’ll never get used to in all my years of dancing, I suppose. Yet, the pain was worth the screams of the crowd when we hit our final 8-counts and all the recognition we are able to get from the way our bodies move - in a good way. LSU and dance were traits I don’t think I could ever get rid of. Baton Rouge was my home now, and a damn good one if I do say so myself. 

I decided to clamber my way out of the lifted twin bed and get a start with my day. I opened the blackout curtains to the bright Louisiana sun, shinning its way into the small room. My roommate, Kelsey, had already left early in the morning to go see family for the day. Yes, Baton Rouge is a good home - but it would still be just as amazing if I had some family that lived here. I wish I could go see family like Kelsey did, but the fact that my family lived about 4 states over; prevented me from seeing them as often as I would like. It also prevented them from being in the stands on LSU game-days. Which meant they weren’t able to see what I worked so hard to become, why I chose dance as a sport. It made me upset, with it being my rookie year and no family to come watch every Saturday, but I have amazing teammates and friends who make up for it. 

Now, I don’t blame my parents harshly for missing game days. My dad stays busier than a squirrel in a nut factory, but both him and mom try to be here whenever they can. My dad, the one and only Zac Taylor, is the new head coach of the Cincinnati Bengals. So yeah, I really can’t blame him for not being here on game days. After making my way to the rooms private bathroom; I decided to take a nice long shower to wash away the hairspray, dried sweat, and body glitter that had invaded every bit of my skin. Turning off the water, I grabbed my towel and dried off. After doing necessary hygiene and hair styling, I put on an LSU shirt, black shorts and my white tennis shoes. The weather was about as hot as hell in Louisiana and the dorms can get pretty stuffy at times, so I always try to stay as cool as possible. I was finishing up putting my jewelry on when my phone started to ring.

“Hello?” I picked up not even bothering to look at the contact name. 

“Honey! It’s so good to hear your voice again!” A joyful voice spread from the phone to my ears and my mouth grew into a huge smile.

“Mom! It’s great to hear your voice again to. What’s going on?” I responded back, starting to miss my mom a little more than I already had been.

“Oh nothing really hun, I should be asking you what’s going on after that huge win last night! Your dad and I got to watch some it and even got to see you dance some - well from what the cameras would show”  My heart swelled, mom and dad were actually watching for me last night.

“I’m glad y’all could see me dance some, I wish you guys could be here. I miss y’all” I said, wishing I could be with my mom and dad right now.

“We miss you so much Y/n, I’m honestly still not use to seeing your bedroom empty” I heard my moms tone change. I hated hearing and seeing my mom get upset, but I know me living so far away took a toll on her.

I opened my mouth to respond, but then my mom started talking again. “Wait, how many classes do you have this week? And do you have practice any?” She questioned.

I looked over at my desk calendar checking to see if this upcoming week was busy. “Uhm, I actually only have one in person class this week on Thursday and no practice this week because it’s an off week, Why?” I questioned back.

“Why don’t your dad and I buy you a plane ticket and you come up and spend the week at home!” My eyes lit up in excitement, going to Cincinnati sounded great right now.

“Really? You guys would do that for me?” I said, surprising myself that I was able to form that sentence without screaming in happiness.

“Of course hun, I’m going to go tell your dad and get that ticket! Would you be good with leaving tonight?” 

“Yes, that sounds great! Whatever gets me to y’all the fastest!” I don’t even think happy is the word to describe my mood right now.

“Yay! I’ll text you the ticket and everything else as soon as I get it Y/n. I love you sweetheart, I can’t wait to see you!” My mom squealed into my ear. 

“Okay mom, I love you and can’t wait to see you too!” After that we said our goodbyes and I had some bags to pack.

I shoot Kelsey a text saying I had a last minute trip to Cincinnati and probably wouldn’t be here when she got back. I let her know when I’d be back and that if she needed anything - to call. I grabbed some duffel bags and started packing up whatever I had, still in shock that I was going to be able to see my parents. Even though it had only been a few months since I last saw them, being separated from them made it feel like years. 

Mom ended up sending my plane ticket about thirty minutes after our call had ended. I was departing at 7 tonight, and with it only being 11 in the morning - I had some time to kill till I needed to leave for the airport. I continued packing when my phone buzzed.

Coach Dad

Miss you lil bit ❤️ so glad you’re coming home. Let me know when you get to the airport.

Love, Dad.

I smiled at his text. He still felt the need to sign off his texts like a letter, even after the countess times of me telling him ‘people don’t do that’. Ever since my dad took the head coach position of the Bengals, I don’t have much time to see or talk to him. So, I cherish any moment I am able to get with him. Hopefully this trip would allow me to get even closer to my parents - especially my dad.

———————————————————————-

I threw all my bags in the back of my car and hopped into the drivers seat. I cranked up the car, pulled out of my dorm buildings parking lot and made the quick 20 minute drive to the airport. 

Upon arriving to the airport, it was only 4:45 p.m. - so I had time to get checked in, go through TSA and chill before my flight. Dad always said to ‘get to the airport extremely early, just incase’ although it was annoying when we flew when I was younger. I was never known to be an early bird, so leaving at 4 a.m. for 10 a.m. flights when I was a kid was dreadful. I still remember when we moved to Cincinnati, I was a bit younger when we moved but the flight over was one of those 4 a.m. deals. I texted dad and mom that I arrived at the airport and got out of the car to grab my bags. I checked in at the first desk I saw and then walked down the incredibly long terminal. ‘Why did airports have to be so big?’ I thought as my feet started to drag. I reached my boarding area and went through TSA - thankfully not having to be stopped to be patted down. After TSA, I was free to roam till the flight boarded. I wasn’t really hungry and airport food is expensive, so I don’t think I’ll get food - plus it was only a 3 hour flight, so I would just eat whatever they provide on the plane. I decided to sit down and scroll on my phone, trying to waste time. I looked at the texts my parents had sent back about my flight and to text them when I took off and landed, so I responded back to those first.

I then opened my Instagram and started to scroll through and like what was on my feed. Photos ranged from LSU posts to something my friends had posted the day before. After scrolling for a minute, a Cincinnati Bengals post popped up on my feed. Yes, I did follow the Bengals account but I never really kept up with them - I was always too invested in LSU to even think twice about the team dad coached. Plus since dad had only started coaching them this year, I really didn’t keep up with them - I hadn’t even gone to a game yet. The post consisted of introducing their rookies and their stats after the first few games. First slide: Tee Higgins - Wide Receiver, Second slide: Logan Wilson - Linebacker, Slide three: Akeem Brian- Davis - Linebacker, Fourth and final slide: Joe Burrow - Quarterback.

Joe Burrow. Joe Burrow. Joe Burrow. I repeated his name in my head over and over, but where had I heard it from? I decided to look this Burrow kid up and to say I was shocked was underplaying it.

Joe Burrow - Heisman Trophy Winner 2019!

Joe Burrow Drafted First Pick for Cincinnati Bengals!

Joe Burrow and LSU win 2019 National Championship!

Joe Burrow. The name made sense now. Joe Burrow. The dude was a fucking legend at LSU… and he just so happened to be playing for my dads team. I remember hearing people talk about him when I first arrived at LSU, especially the girls. I guess I’ve never put two and two together till now. I looked at pictures of him. I’ll give it to him - he was pretty cute, but from what I’ve heard he had a reputation at LSU; specifically a fuck-boy one. 

I looked up more about Burrow. Something about him was so interesting to me, I couldn’t figure out what it was though. I’m honestly surprised no one had asked me about him yet because of my dad - but I guess since dad was new, nobody really knew I was his daughter. 

Looking at his pictures more made notice how Joe looked absolutely angelic… like something from heaven. I shouldn’t get caught up in obsessing over him though. He had a bad reputation at LSU and most likely now, and I needed to keep mine a clean slate. I was attending school on a full ride athletic scholarship because of dance - being that the LSU Tiger Girls recruited me for their squad without even having to tryout.

If I ever got into an entanglement with a guy like Joe Burrow then there’s no telling what it would do to my character. There’s no way a guy that looks like Joe would step foot in my direction though. I’m the coaches daughter, so if he ever did figure out about me then I’d probably be way off limits…and he’d be totally out of my league.

After all my research and pondering, the airport intercom called over to say my flight was boarding. I grabbed my carry on bag from beside my chair and made my way to the tunnel outside of the plane, making sure to text my parents that we were boarding and going to leave soon. Once the other passengers and I were boarded and sat in our seats, the pilot went over the basic rules of plane, what to do in an emergency, and all the extra details. Once he finished and the plane was ready, we were good for take-off. As I relaxed in my seat and looked out my window at the runway lights, I couldn’t help but think about three things: Cincinnati, my parents, and Joe Burrow.

———————————————————————-

first part ever! ah so excited - i hope this turns out to be all i wanted in a fanfic, and i hope you guys enjoy it! <3

[marine-indie-gal]

Is anyone truly deeply aware of The Obscure Adaptation of "The Island of Dr. Moreau" but as a Kids Cartoon? I know that defiantly sounds a hell of a Crazy idea of wanting to Adapt an Sci-Fi Horror Adult Book into a Goofy Cartoon, but believe it or not, this One is not just your ordinary version.

So I've recently been watching a New Obscure Show from Canadian called "Spliced", which is a Semi-Adaptation of One of H.G. Wells' Novels that I've mentioned before, only instead of focusing on Vivisection, it focuses on the Society of Mutant Animal Mashup Hybrid Beasts. But in a Slice-of-Life way, not in a Dramatic tone like how the Book putted in.

Granted, I never really have read the Book before but the Cursed 90s Adaptation is the Only Version that I have seen (have not ever dared to wanting to look into the 30s or 70s one).

So far, the only buildup of trying another Foreign Show but this time from Canada (Which I have seen Many Canadian Shows in My Childhood like with "Ruby Gloom" or the more famous, EEnE or G4's MLP), & despite Me having a more deep touch on Japan, Russia, French, or Ireland (cough, cough, which I am attached to my Most Favorite Foreign Film studios from each of there's, cough), I'm always more open-minded to Other Foreign Animated Media from a Different Country. Which inspired Me to take my own Redesign Trip on the Spliced cast, if they looked more Different or at least Realistically Accurate to their Animal Mashup species while also mixing both the Show and My Own Artstyle.

I was originally going to neglect Compuhorse since I couldn't afford on what to do with Him to Re-design him since I had no idea on how to do a Personal Interpretation Mashup between an Animal with Electronic (let alone have a Horse be implanted with Technology since the Animal Mashups between Two or More Beasts were way easier) but then I instantly did figure out something on how to do by just turning the tables around and have Him in a Wheel Chair with No Legs (as a callback to his own Inspiration since he's a Stephen Hawking based-parody). I dunno, chances are, I just didn't want to leave him out since he's one of the Show's Main Characters.

Princess Pony Apehands was honestly my Most Favorite out of the Redesigns, while her looks may have been based off of the Stereotypical Girly-Girl Pony type, I wanted to redesign her by adding some adjustments to make it more "Modern-like" (inspired by Horseland).

Two-Legs Joe was obviously a twist (I know as to why he is called by that) but since I've "swapped" Compuhorse and Joe in this, I'd figure why not five Joe some Feathers (more as Wings than just Arms) so I guess you could at least say that he's now "Armed-Winged Two-Legs Joe"?, "Winged-Two-Legs Joe"? I just thought maybe a Flying Rhinoceros with Wings would be pretty funny if you're back or your tail is attached to a Bird (though he would pretty much still use his own Legs for Hands).

The Rest of Them were easier since you could obviously tell for Which Character they had More than just One Species being a Mashup of (minus Patricia since she's already an Animal Mashup Born, a Platypus (Duck-Beaver)), but Peri and Fuzzy were very hard, I know Peri is supposed to be Half Octo Half Cat or Fox but to Me, he looked more like a Squirrel so I made him into a Flying Squirrel/Cuttlefish mashup but for Fuzzy, considering that his Mashup Species is nowhere confirmed, I had to do my best coming up with the best instinct of Two Rodent Species of Animal as I theorized Fuzzy to be an Mashup of Two Rodents combined (A Bunny and An Albino Possum or a Rat).

Spliced (c) Nelvana

Redesigns of the Spliced Characters (c) Me

[shadowqueenjude]

A compilation of sassy Lucien

“My apologies, lady. I’m Lucien. Courtier and emissary. Your eyes are like stars, and your hair like burnished gold.” “Then you’ve got your work cut out for you, old son. I’m sure her life will be a fine replacement for Andras’s—maybe she can even train with the others on the border.”

“I told you so, Tamlin. Your skills with females have definitely become rusty in recent decades.”

“Well, you don’t look half as bad now. A relief, I suppose, since you’re to live with us. Though the tunic isn’t as pretty as a dress.” “We’re not going to bite.” “Won’t you stay for wine?” “It’s been a few decades since I last saw one of you, but you humans never change, so I don’t think I’m wrong in asking why you find our company to be so unpleasant, when surely the men back home aren’t much to look at.” “True. But indulge me: you’re a human woman, and yet you’d rather eat hot coals than sit here longer than necessary. Ignoring this, surely we’re not so miserable to look at. Unless you have someone back home. Unless there’s a line of suitors out the door of your hovel that makes us seem like worms in comparison.”

“Were you admiring my sword, or just contemplating killing me, Feyre?” “So young, and so grave. And a skilled killer already.” “We also dance with the spirits under the full moon and snatch human babes from their cradles to replace them with changelings—” “No ash arrows today, unfortunately.” “Well, you certainly have the quiet part of hunting down." “Well? No game good enough for you to slaughter? We’ve passed plenty of squirrels and birds.” “Tamlin said as much, which was no doubt why he brought you here. Or maybe you looked so pathetic in those rags that he took pity on you.” “So, when are you going to start trying to persuade me to beseech Tamlin to find a way to free you from the Treaty’s rules?” “Well, thank the Cauldron that you didn’t. Cleaning up that mess would have ruined the rest of my day.” “Would you like me to teach you how to wield a blade, or do you already know how, oh mighty mortal huntress? If you took down Andras, you probably don’t need to learn anything. Only where to aim, right?” “I suppose you humans are such hateful cowards that you would have wet yourself, curled up, and waited to die if you’d known beyond a doubt what Andras truly was.” “Back off? Back off while you seal our fates and ruin everything? I stayed with you out of hope, not to watch you stumble. For someone with a heart of stone, yours is certainly soft these days. The Bogge was on our lands—the Bogge, Tamlin! The barriers between courts have vanished, and even our woods are teeming with filth like the puca. Are you just going to start living out there, slaughtering every bit of vermin that slinks in?” “I had to go sort out some hotheads on the northern border—official emissary business. I got back in time to hear your little spat with Tam, and decided I was safer up here. I’m glad to hear your human heart has warmed to me, though. At least I’m not on the top of your killing list.” “I’ll be conveniently hunting on the grounds, and with my superior hearing, I might be feeling generous enough to listen if someone screams from the western woods. But it’s a good thing I had no role in telling you to go out today, since Tam would eviscerate anyone who told you how to trap a Suriel; and it’s a good thing I had planned to hunt anyway, because if anyone caught me helping you, there would be trouble of a whole other hell awaiting us. I hope your secrets are worth it.” “I might die of surprise. You made a joke, Feyre.” “Well, I’m late for something incredibly important." “If I offer you the moon on a string, will you give me a kiss, too?” “Unfortunately for you and your neck, tonight’s just a party.” “So there’s singing and dancing and excessive drinking. And dallying,” he added with a wicked grin. “I’ll have you know that while you two were dancing with the spirits, I was stuck on border patrol. With some company.” "I'm trying to eat." “What do you know about anything? You’re just Amarantha’s whore.” “Those clothes are enough to convince me I never want to enter the human realm.” Lucien told her to go back to the shit-hole she’d crawled out of. “Fixed—as pert and pretty as before.” “I’ve seen enough of you through that gown to last a lifetime.” You might as well look good if you’re going to arm yourself to the teeth. “Isn’t that what all human women wish for? A handsome faerie lord to wed and shower them with riches for the rest of their lives?” “If you expect our gratitude, you’ll be waiting a while, Ianthe.” “Whatever you’re planning, it’ll land us knee-deep in shit.” “I knew. I knew you were lying the moment you unleashed that light in Hybern. My friend at the Dawn Court has the same power—her light is identical. And it does not do whatever horseshit you lied about it doing.” “You have the gall to question my priorities regarding Elain—yet what was your motive where I was concerned? Did you plan to spare me from your path of destruction because of any genuine friendship, or simply for fear of what it might do to her?”

[quibbs126]

So I made these Warrior Cats designs today, mostly out of boredom and because I wanted to draw

As you can tell, I took some creative liberties. Which for the most part we’re just me making them more genetically accurate since I’m back on watching that cat genetic video playlist again. I kept losing focus on it as I drew though

Spottedleaf and Redtail were my first attempts, but they didn’t end up looking that great. They were also originally going to be full body, but then I realized I don’t know how to draw cat bodies, so they’re just neck up, like usual. I did a lot better with Sandstorm so I just stuck with her method

I’m pretty sure Spottedleaf and Redtail are actually calicos, not plain tortoiseshells, but shush I wanted to do it like that. Though the not full body means I can’t show off the idea of Redtail’s red being mostly around his hind and tail

With Sandstorm I made her a dilute tortie because of the whole “Redtail being her dad” thing. When I looked on the Wiki I saw that this appears isn’t the case anymore, but screw it, I like the idea and personally wanted to keep it. She originally had grey fur, but I changed it to fawn so that Leafpool could still be at least partially brown-ish

As for Firestar, I know that genetically he wouldn’t be red, since his mother was brown, but I mean his fur color being red is relevant so shush. Maybe Nutmeg is red in this universe, I don’t know. I also made him a mackerel, though I kind of want to make him a classic tabby now. But then I’d have to change Leafpool’s markings too, which is too much of a hassle right now

Also randomly I just want to add in for no particular reason, my favorite era of Firestar is when he’s a stressed as hell out deputy to a losing her grip on reality Bluestar. Don’t know why I wanted to add that but I do. I think I just want to read the books again

I decided to then make Squirrelflight and Leafpool because why not? And they’re both torties because I made Sandstorm one. Granted I probably could have left at least one of them solid, since they’re like, two thirds red and only one third something else. But I kind of like how they look, so shush

I’ve actually been editing Squirrelflight as I write this, since first I realized I didn’t change Squirrel’s black coloring after changing Sand and Leaf’s grey to fawn. Then I realized that I didn’t need to keep Squirrel’s red the same as Fire’s, since he’s a tabby and that’s a whole color thing (or something, I wasn’t paying too much attention), and then trying to make it so her cinnamon doesn’t clash with the new red. I think I got something good now?

Leaf doesn’t have much to talk about other than being a dilute tortie, but with more fawn than her mother

With Tigerclaw I just kept him basically the same as canon. Other than that, random thing but I half forgot that Tigerclaw not actually being evil and instead just being a grump is something that I made up and isn’t actually canon

Then I made Goldenflower so I could do Bramble and Tawny like I did Squirrel and Leaf. I think she’s a tabby in canon, but I took that out. Also she and Tigerclaw’s amber eye colors were switched originally, but the lighter amber clashed with the cream color

I know Bramble is supposed to look identical to his dad, this was a plot point, but genetically that isn’t accurate, he should be either red or cream from his mom’s side because fur color is sex linked. I think in a previous attempt at this I made him red, with the idea that it made Bramble actually resemble Fire, but this time I went with cream so that he’d look like his dad but with his mom’s colors

Tawnypelt is mostly the same. Her black fur’s because Tigerclaw’s a black tabby. And also her eyes are amber because her parents have amber eyes

I wasn’t sure who to do after, I was gonna just call it quits, but then I decided to do Lionheart since he was important to the first book. And as I checked on the Wiki he’s apparently Goldenflower’s brother. I feel like I made him look fruity, which wasn’t intentional, I was just trying to make him look like Goldenflower

Also Lionheart and Goldenflower look a lot like Daisy I’m noticing. Probably shouldn’t have done that but oh well

I might make more of these, probably first doing Dustpelt and Ravenpaw and then Cinderpelt’s family, maybe Ferncloud and Ashfur too, who knows?

[onegirllis]

So, about the new LIS trailer

It took me some time, but forgive me for the delayed response. I had to dig myself out of the fandom grave to actually look around and notice what the hell was going on. I spent another moment pondering if I still care, and with the answer "barely," I came here to write this post.

1) For whatever reason DickNein (yes, I didn't miss the scandal, who is the nazi now?) still doesn't understand what made LIS 1 so successful. It wasn't the diversity; it wasn't the same copy-paste lines; it wasn't the murder; it wasn't the superheroes from small towns with different powers. It wasn't even the lesbians (I know, shocking!). There were merely a few elements that made LIS special: - Magical Arcadia Bay with its residents - The rewind time superpower, which was one of the best mechanics in narrative games since the genre was born - Max, Chloe, and Rachel (not necessarily in that order), and you need at least two to make it work, preferably with Chloe at least somewhere there. - the specific art style and saturated colors (butchered a bit in BTS but then going full SIMS 4 for the rest of the games) - and most importantly - the soul Sure, DontNod could get away with alteration, to no fanfare and sometimes to no success, but their experiments came from the right place. This shit ain't it.

2) For whatever reason, Chloe is now a dog. I know. I know. I understand. Listen, my fellow comrades, I know how it feels when the devs pull put shit like, "Oh, they were just friends and grew apart, but now she named her squirrel after the love of her high school life".

3) Max had plastic surgery. She also decided to be entirely anonymous so that she looked like everyone else. Every model looks the same, and I hope they will have their names spelled above them as they walk around. Otherwise, I have no idea who is who. Frankly, she looks a little bit like Steph had a lot of fun with the entire cast of Sims 4 and then had a baby.

4) On top of everything, the new Max, however, probably now goes as Maxine, is teaching her Polaroid skills at a university. Now we know we are in an alternative universe all along. I hope the tuition matches the useful photography skill set you obtain there.

5) For any other reason unknown, she can dress up as Chloe, who can be dead (see the Ultimate edition). I know Max has a long tradition of dressing up as dead people, but I hoped it would go away with her Botox and other plastic corrections. But hey, we survived Chloe dressing up as Rachel and cosplaying as her dad, too, so I guess I shouldn't even be surprised. Not that it's a low-budget movie, and they have a limited wardrobe. It's a video game, but the tradition of having a mental stroke is still strong.

6) Oh no, another murder I gotta solve! I shall use my powers. Why now? Is it another girlfriend who is into printing photos? Or is it her student? Or both? Max becoming Jefferson would be a nice twist, even if not loved among the community, but I don't think it would get anywhere that dark. It just will get stupid.

7) This is supposed to be a fanservice a little too late and on the wrong foot. I know y'all missed Max. I didn't, but I understand the hype on seeing her on the screen. Although following a teenager in Arcadia Bay was interesting, simply by the shot of nostalgia with every step, here we are following a middle-aged single art teacher (or someone who looks middle-aged to the point that they decided on fixing their face). NO ONE WANTS TO FOLLOW THEIR ART TEACHERS WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.

8) The Nazi problem (well, well, well, the turntables). I know DeckNein had to do some cleanup among their staff. I hope they did, but somehow, I doubt it was done for the right purpose. Therefore, I'm uncomfortable giving them any of my money, now or ever. I know, there are worse studios. I know it's stupid, but LIS was always special, filled with this little genuine spark. It just doesn't feel right.

9) The game has the worst UI in the history of modern gaming.

10) And to finish my rant on something even worse, LIS4 is coming just before DontNod's new game, most likely to compete with it on the market. A bit sus, don't you think?

Anyway, dick move, my friends. All of it. Actually, waving dicks around in the air all along. Despite our differences, this ain't right. And God knows how much worse it could be.

[h-c-u]

Come fly with me, let's fly away...

Summary: You and Ice both like to fly, just in completely different ways. And he finally convinced you to take a jet ride with him.

Pairing: Tom "Iceman" Kazansky x fem!reader

W/C: 3.3k

Rating: PG, explicitly stated age gap (19 years). They met for the first time when the reader was 19 (Do I condone that in real life? HELL NO. SHE WOULD HAVE BEEN A BABY).

TWs: None.

A/N: This fic is happening not long after Ice became O-10, he's not married to Sarah, doesn't have any kids, and definitely isn't sick.

Also, the reader is described as really petite, but there are no allusions to ED or food in general; I just wanted that position to work :)

Also Yes, the reader owns her small house with a quite big garden at around 21 without having a job. How and why? Idk, I'm not in her bank account, ask her.

Masterlist | List of tags

- And you're sure it's fine...? You won't get into any trouble...? - You were nervously playing with a strap of his old helmet, he just handed you. Ice just got promoted, and you were still getting used to his new rank. 

- It's not like they can fire me now, dove... - oh that cocky smile that you wanted to rub from his face. Preferably with your fist. Or your own mouth. It didn't really matter, as long as he stopped. - But seriously, we're good. It's a holiday, everyone else is out celebrating, and I've put it as a training exercise, so we're fully covered when it comes to all the paperwork, please don't worry so much, squirrel. - he placed a quick kiss on the top of your head. It wasn't exactly your favorite nickname, but he didn't use it too often, only when he playfully teased you about your not-so-safe hobby. 

Because both of you loved to fly. He was just doing that in a metal can mounted to another can of explosives, and you were... well... Using a thin material to glide. Yet you couldn't help but feel much safer in your wingsuit than inside a jet, that's why it took so long for him to convince you, and right about now, you were seriously rethinking your decision. 

- Relax, dove. - you just couldn't help it. This plane in front of you was basically a killing machine, and even though you loved the adrenaline, you were extremely opposed to conflict and violence, and you sometimes wondered how you ended up with someone in the military, especially that high up.

Well, when you two met he wasn't exactly O-10... He was just promoted to captain. At first, it was supposed to be a rebound-one-night stand with a man literally twice your age (at that time), and on top of that, he was just about to be deployed, so there was literally no chance for a relationship. Yet you still told him you'd like to see him again when he comes back. Which was incredibly stupid and naive, but you were only 19 and he said yes, thinking that you'll forget all about him as soon as you'll meet someone younger while he was gods-know-where, doing gods-know-what.

And you did meet someone. But it fizzled out before it even started. The same thing happened 7 months after you met Ice, and you honestly tried to analyze this whole situation rationally. There were definitely downsides to hooking up with...? dating...? An older man. You weren't even sure what you wanted, so how the hell could you decide if you really wanted it? 

But when you saw him again at the bar, you weren't conflicted. You were just straight-up angry. Because even if he didn't mean it, he did say yes. And it all went quickly downhill from there, well at least for you, because he insisted that you just had to take everything so slowly. He literally didn't allow you to kiss him for four months straight, still hoping that somehow he'll be able to change your mind about him. But you were stubborn, although it was extremely hard for you to be so close to him, without even being able to touch him the way you wanted. There was a lot of pouting, but even more talking and spending time together. Every day after work he helped you in your garden; he even fixed up a shed for you, so the door didn't require a small tank to open and close anymore. 

He taught you many things and told you even more stories. Of course, he couldn't tell you every detail, but it was still nice to hear his voice, and you enjoyed simply watching him doing whatever; didn't matter if it was making pancakes, or working on his plane, as long as he was in your line of sight, you were satisfied. Not in every way, but enough. It took him a full year to realize that you weren't going anywhere. He was already practically living at your house, you put him down as one of your emergency contacts on every possible form, and your cat honestly preferred sleeping on his lap than on yours. And when it hit him, it did with full strength. You weren't even doing anything special... You were just sitting curled up in the giant armchair in his workshop, lazily sketching something in your notebook, and you were getting frustrated because you couldn't get it quite right. He didn't even tell you to come with him, you just showed up around lunch with a spare portion for him, and after you ate, you just stayed there, not even saying anything, because you didn't want to interrupt whatever he was doing. And that's what did it for him... A thing that you did dozens of times over the last year, but this time something in him clicked. 

It's not like he didn't want you with every atom of his body, but Ice-cold always had full control over his basic instincts. But right then and there, he made a conscious decision to do everything in his power to make you the happiest person on earth, and that included finally giving you the relationship you deserved. He of course insisted on never being added on a deed to your house and was very adamant that you'd keep your finances separate, even though he started contributing long before that conversation. He would always push you to explore and learn things on your own and was always there to cheer on you from the first row. And if you'd one day decide that you'd be happier elsewhere, he would let you go. But he didn't have to, because you had eyes only for him...

Even now, almost 7 years after your wedding you were still getting giddy whenever he would hug you or even smiled at you, that's exactly why you found yourself in pilot gear, even though you've never held a flying stick in your hands before. His old helmet was way too big for you, and eventually, he got you another one and that one fit. Even though his stoic presence usually was enough to calm you down, this time it wasn't so easy. It's not like you were afraid of flying; you used choppers in the past to get to the desired altitudes, but this was different. This was a war machine, and you frowned because an unpleasant thought entered your mind... Was this F-22 ever used to kill anyone? 

- Y/N....? - his voice pulled you from your spiral of thoughts, and you rested your gaze on his eyes. - C'mere, dove... - he repeated the request, reaching for your arm to pull you onto the wing he was currently standing on. Sure, he could have let you use a ladder, but this was much more fun. He didn't have any trouble pulling you up with one hand, and you would be lying if you said that his strength didn't turn you on, especially considering all the positions he was to hold you in for long periods of time. 

- And you're sure it's safe...? - you've repeated the question you already asked at least 20 times today. 

- I always managed to come back in those, so I'd say they have a pretty good record... - he said jokingly and started settling in the cabin. He did all the pre-flight checks before you joined him in the pilot seat. You checked earlier, and even with you sitting in front of him, on the same chair, there was enough space for him to reach everything he needed. Before you climbed in, he also loosened the safety belts, so you could fit in them with him, just in case. He didn't plan on doing anything crazy today, but he'd still rather be prepared for anything. - C'mere, dove... - he was done with the checks and was ready to finally take you flying his way. You settled cozily in front of him. It was a tight, but not impossible fit, and if you were being completely honest, you enjoyed having him so close to you... He reached around you and made sure that the emergency oxygen line was connected to your mask, connected your coms to his, and buckled you both in, so everything was properly secured. 

- Tower, this is Iceman, how do you read? - he started following the procedures, and you patiently kept quiet, sitting between his legs. Your compact size definitely had its perks, because at first, you were afraid that he wouldn't be able to see anything if you sat in front of him in a helmet, but fortunately, that wasn't a problem.

- Iceman, Tower, loud and clear, how me? - an unfamiliar voice replied through the comms. 

- Loud and clear. Take-off pre-checks complete. 

- Ready engines start. Iceman, you are clear to taxi. Runway number 2. Winds 21, 0, 10. - you've felt the jet move before you actually saw it moving because Tom was driving it extremely slowly to the designated runway as if he wanted to put you in warm water, so you could get used to it before it starts boiling.

- Fuel check - good. Cabin pressure check - good. Tower this is Iceman, requesting an unrestricted climb to 500 and above. 

- Iceman, the runway and skies are yours. 

- Iceman ready for takeoff. 

- Iceman, Tower. You are clear for takeoff. - you didn't know that, but at this moment he cut his mice on the line to the Tower. 

- You ready, dove...? - he asked, and you nodded. - It's gonna be a bumpy ride for a moment, but as soon as we'll be in the air it will be much calmer... - he informed you and gave you one last hug before he actually started accelerating on the runway. You couldn't help but close your eyes. It was so loud... You felt like the engines were exploding and the nose of the jet was ripping through the fabric of air... It wasn't pleasant, to say the least, and you couldn't imagine doing anything else under those conditions. There were so many systems, and Ice knew them like the back of his hand, and wasn't even looking at the knobs he was flipping, completely relying on his muscle memory. 

But you finally started climbing and you felt yourself melting into the strong body behind you. You were honestly afraid that with added pressure on his chest, he'd have trouble breathing, but he seemed to be doing more than alright. 

- How are you feeling...? - he asked after finally leveling the jet at around 10k ft. 

- Haven't decided yet... - you laughed because the view was amazing, and something you never got to see while wingsuit flying... - It's so loud, I didn't know it was that loud... - you were a little bit overwhelmed by engine and wind sounds and your thoughts weren't fully coherent because of it. 

- To be honest, I've quickly stopped noticing it... But... - he started patting his suit, checking if he still had something in his pockets. And he did. - I have a pair of noise-canceling plugs... I usually use them when I'm near the tarmac because it's always much louder there. They're all yours... - it was hard to properly manouver them under your helmet, especially with gloves, but even though they weren't in all the way, they still were a massive help. - Better? - he asked when you'd stopped fumbling, and you nodded in response. Now his voice was also muffled, but you could still hear him. 

- Are you ready for some gymnastics...? - his voice was giddy, almost as if he was a kid who got exactly what he wanted on Christmas morning and couldn't wait to share that news with his friends. You knew he wouldn't knowingly put you in any danger, so you nodded again. - Hold on tight, dove. - you didn't even know what to hold, so you grabbed his thighs at the exact moment when he did a first screwdriver. It was easy, you knew how to do those, but after that... He was maneuvering the jet in ways you didn't think possible. Dropping and ascending, swirling around imaginary targets, flying upside down... And as soon as your adrenaline kicked in, you couldn't help but laugh at every sudden change of direction. It was like riding a super advanced, super expensive rollercoaster, and you loved rollercoasters. 

You weren't exactly sure how long you were in the air before he leveled the plane again. 

- How about now, dove...? - you knew that he could tell by your laugh that you enjoyed it, but you were more than happy to use your words. 

- It has its perks, I'm not gonna lie... - you laughed again. - I still prefer my wingsuit, because I feel like I have more control. But from now on, I won't say no to an occasional jet ride. - you smiled, even though he wasn't able to see it beaming on your face. 

- Do you want to take the stick...? - he asked, and you honestly weren't sure if you heard him right. 

- What?

- Do you want to take the stick...? - he repeated, apparently being serious. 

- But... - you've started, but he was already moving your hands from his thighs to the stick and covering them with his own. 

- I'm here, and no matter what you'll do, I'll be able to correct it at this height... So I'm gonna ask again. Do you want to take the stick...? - his voice was stoic, even if full of joy. He knew he was good and that even if you somehow managed to put the jet in a complete nosedive, he'd still be able to pull you up in time. And you knew he wouldn't do anything to jeopardize your life, so you nodded. - Ok, focus only on the stick, everything else is my job, ok...? - and you nodded again. - It acts basically like a joystick in games. If you want to move left, you move it to the left... - and his hands, still holding yours in them, moved the stick to the left. - If you want to move to the right, you move to the right... - and now you were gently swaying right. - If you want to go up, you pull it toward you... And if you wanna go down, then away... - he demonstrated, and just like that, you were on your own. 

Of course, you were afraid to move at first, you knew perfectly well how much one of those planes cost, and you couldn't help it. 

- Don't be afraid, dove... I'm here... - he repeated, and you finally relaxed a bit, and when your grip on the stick loosened a bit, you were able to feel something more... You tried gently swaying it left and right, and it was easier to do it to the left. Not by much, but you still noticed it. Surprised by your own discovery, you tried to do the same by gently swaying up and down... And it was just a tiny bit easier to go up... 

- I know you're sure that you'll be able to save us if I fuck up, but I need you to say it one more time because I feel like I'm about to do something really stupid. - this time he laughed maniacally. 

- I'm confident I'll be able to save us, dove, even if you'll somehow invade another country in this jet. - he reassured you again. 

- In that case, it's all on you... - you've said on the exhale and tried to feel the winds again. In your wingsuit, it was much easier. Not only because you were directly cooperating with the wind, but also because you had much, much more experience in flying that way. But even though the winds at this height were stronger, they were more or less the same, you just had to learn how to communicate with them and use them through this tin can. - Wait... How do you slow down and speed up...? - you asked when you wanted to match the speed of the winds, but you realized... you didn't know how. Ice laughed and guided your left hand to the correct lever. 

- Forwards - faster, backward - slower. - he didn't have to say much, just happy to observe you trying to find a footing in his world. 

- Ok... Here goes nothing... - you had to hype yourself up a little bit before you actually did any sudden turns... It took you good 20 seconds to finally gather enough courage to slow down enough to match the wind the best as you could. But as you were flying slower, it was easier to feel the direction of the wind, and you were glad for that. You exhaled quickly three times and finally started following the wind current down. It was rough and full of twists and turns, and it took you some time to get used to the controls. You saw Ice flipping some switches when he realized what you were doing, assisting you as best as he could because he never actually encountered anyone who would fly a military jet like that. You took your own technique and applied it to the 600 million-dollar machine, which was definitely... something else. You didn't have any proper training in flying, your head wasn't soaked with all the correct ways to fly a plane, so you took all your personal knowledge and applied it here. 

- Whoah! - Ice was surprised by a sudden drop, because nothing that rough showed up on the wind shear detection, yet you had no issues with just... feeling it. - How did you notice that? - he asked, genuinely surprised. 

- There are patterns... - you mumbled under your nose, still completely focused on the way how the stick felt in your hand. You didn't even notice when you closed your eyes a bit, so you could feel it better, and only after you've finished an unnamed maneuver, you got out of the trans you were usually in while you were flying in the wingsuit. - I mean... Wind behaves a certain way because of changes in pressure. And if you spend enough time relying on it, you kinda start seeing the patterns before you even enter the stream. I know how it sounds, trust me... I don't even know how else to explain it, because it's not something that I was taught during courses... Every instructor just said that you need to learn how to feel and hear it. And up here...? Everything is just... So... Loud... So I heard the change in the sound and followed it. - you tried to explain it as best as you could, but just... couldn't find the right words. You were sure that there was a scientific explanation for all this, but it was much easier to learn how to feel and hear it. 

- Huh... - he sounded curious. - Maybe next time you'll be trying to kill yourself, squirrel, I might actually join you... - he sighed heavily, taking the stick from your hands because you were starting to get lower than he felt comfortable with; there were birds at this altitude, and he would prefer to avoid them. 

- Wait... Are you serious...? - now you were the one who got excited. Usually, he let you have your own things to do. Of course, he was right there with you during your certifications and the numerous qualifications, but he never expressed interest in actually joining you up there. 

- Dead serious, dove... It actually sounds interesting and I would love to learn more about wind currents firsthand. - if you weren't basically tied to a seat with him, you would have jumped from excitement, which would be a poor decision in such a tight space. 

- Iceman, An Admiral, and US Pacific Fleet Commander in a squirrel suit... Can't wait to see it. - he groaned and instantly started regretting even bringing it up. 

- Promise me, you won't tell anyone about this... - you couldn't help but laugh. 

- I promise, I won't... - you didn't say anything about taking pictures though. 

[onegianthotmess]

Why do I feel like Vincent’s daughter would be weirdly morbid or dark in her humor?

Like, she’s still so sweet and an angel like her father, but she’d just have a strange fascination with anything dark. She has a weird fascination for horror stories and she can be seen admiring knives from the kitchen and makes Sebastian panic because she did that when she was a child and almost cut herself while admiring a fucking meat cleaver. She’ll just sit in the garden and watch King chase squirrels and occasionally catch them and eat them.

She sketches strange and morbid scenes and honestly kind of scares Vincent sometimes. She even scares Theo, and he’s the intimidating one out of him and Vincent!

And she’s definitely scared the residents many times because she’s always been quiet and has had the habit of following people when they do something that interests her. Like she’ll follow Jean around and watch him spar with Napoleon and she’s even followed him into town to his weapons shop.

Speaking of Jean’s weapon shop, Vincent’s daughter fucking loves it. She just sits there with her sketch pad and draws weapons and had drawn Jean caring for the weapons. It scared Jean the first few times she quietly followed him to the weapon’s shop without him knowing because she was literally a CHILD, but he eventually started asking Vincent if it was okay for her to tag along with him because she just kept on following him into town.

And kids in town have made fun of her or called her a freak for liking such morbid things, even some parents have called her a devil child at times. People also tend to avoid Vincent’s son and make fun of him because of his big sister’s strange obsession with morbid things, but a quick scary smile from both her and Vincent makes apologies instantly come out of people’s mouths and they run away.

No one fucks with Vincent’s family, especially his precious baby girl or baby boy. And Vincent’s daughter will throw hands at anyone who says anything bad about her baby brother.

She even put a full grown man in a fucking choke hold when she was six because he was yelling about how her brother and her whole family were going to hell because of her, and no one says shit about her family unless they want to get killed. Theo had to pull her off of the man because Vincent was conflicted between letting her choke the man until he passed out or pulling his daughter away from him because he also wanted to sucker punch the guy for saying stuff about his family.

And Vincent’s daughter constantly apologizes to her brother and the rest of her family for the way she is and even tried to stop liking dark things and tried to be interested in something that girls are supposed to like. Her family assured her that she was fine and was allowed to like what she likes, which was good because when she tried to get into gardening and botany, she only just fell down a rabbit hole of extremely poisonous plants and flowers and fruits, which ended in her spending three straight days in Comte’s library reading every single book he had on poisonous plant life cover to cover.

This turned into a full on mini rant, but I kind of like it. I just wanted to get a thought out and now I really wanna make the kids for the suitors. The wives/partners may take longer, but I’ll describe physical characteristics of them when I do the kids!

[autumn-foxfire]

New York time~

"Huh? What's happening to me?" You're sick for the plot, Ran, don't worry, you'll live.

You know, I actually hate when Ran's like "Shinichi saved me," when it's Conan calling for her. "It's so romantic that she sees him when he's Conan," nah, I find it a bit insulting to the relationship she shares with Conan because she doesn't know he's Shinichi and she should be close to him at this point.

Ran asks Shinichi a simple request because she wants to see a sight she's never seen before and he doesn't do it. So romantic from the beginning, Gosho 🤮

Shinichi is such a little shit. We need to see more of it in the series.

This scene did create one of my favourite HCs for Shinichi though, that Yukiko teaches him to drive and he adopts her insane driving habits. Hell, Shinichi's complaints about her driving aren't even that she's reckless, it's that the car had just been repaired and that their are police around.

Plus, what he does next just shows he actually doesn't care. And shows he's done this many times with his mum. I bet he used to go "Can we do the thing again!" and Yukiko obliged everytime XD

This timeline doesn't make sense. Yukiko quit acting at 20 when she got married and had Shinichi, but we see her take lessons with Toichi when Kaito is at least 5-6 years old. Unless she was just meeting up with him to catch up and I misremembered that moment?

I wonder why you, Chris, don't consider Chris to be your daughter. Hmmmmm, I wonder............

<.< Sorry to disappoint you, Yukiko, but you won't have a daughter-in-law, but a son-in-law. Who is also your nephew.

So overdramatic, it's clear it didn't hit her.

Shinichi's not bored Ran, he's just a nerd for the actual myth so this doesn't interest him.

You know what, I'd be bored too if they combined the greek myth with christian mythology for a dumb plot twist. It doesn't surprise me that the king of dumb plot twists made a dumb plot twist for the broadway musical.

Shinichi really doesn't understand social clues XD Just straight up pinches a strangers cheeks to check it was the real person this time completely unprompted.

Yuusaku doing what I plan to do after these episodes. Just focus on writing.

Yukiko, doesn't it bother you that you don't know so much about your own son because it's been so long?

Love how unflustered Shinichi is around women usually. He's only so when Gosho needs him to be extremely attracted to Ran in that moment in time in a way that just screams overcompensating.

Oh yeah, she's supposed to have a fever. Gosho did not set that up at all. Then again, Ran usually only gets half-hearted writing so I can't say I'm all that surprised.

...Where did Shinichi pull the squirrel? Chipmunk? From?

It's a bit of a shame to see the cases I was actually looking forward to rewatching aren't written as well as I thought they were.

[thebiggestmenace]

what a wild ride

ouchie ouchie ouchie

is he already out of Purgatory??

what the fuck is this??

Benny??

wait, isn't this the season where Sam has a dog?

it is!

Dean, you can't be this mad at him :( how was he supposed to know you were in Purgatory?

we finally got Squirrel!!! it's just been Moose for the longest time!

also I do remember this season?

"I think too much heart was always Castiel's problem" said only to Dean???? these bitches gay! good for them!

I love Amelia :( and tbh did the boys not agree to get on with normal lives if something happened to one of them? cause I could've sworn they did. and I know this was different cause Dean went to Purgatory, but how would Sam have known that?

is he hallucinating Cas??

so Cas sacrificed himself for Dean?

wait, isn't this the season where all the angels fall?

let's have a sleepover!!! I forgot about that line!

and now they're in the wannabe cartoon!

what did Naomi do to Cas????

Samadriel was tortured, Naomi. it's not like he revealed the tablet on purpose???

oh, Dean loves LARPing

AHHHH THE MEN OF LETTERS!!!!! I THOUGHT THAT WAS THIS SEASON!!!!

oh, and Abaddon?

wait, isn't that the episode Jensen actually fell asleep?

omg the bunker!!!!! fucking love the bunker

Dean's absolute pride of having his own room :')

forgot how very brutal the trails are

I forgot Naomi made Cas kill Dean so many times, what the hell

Cas beating the shit out of Dean and Crowley killing Meg in the same episode??? ouchie ouchie ouchie

I have missed Bobby :(((

"in the words of a good friend - bite me" so true, fucking love that line

oh, and we have found Cas

and the parents are fighting, actually

omg are they about to find the dungeon thingy?!

THEY ARE!!!!! idk why this makes me so happy?????

also Dean has been calling Sam Sammy a lot more this season?

Cas, you don't need to threaten a man over pie 🤭

so this is the season all the angels fall, I assumed I just had them mixed up

also The Scene where Dean barges in right before Sam finishes the last trail was part of that one edit from s1? I think? the one where we see them as children

chat, this isn't fun anymore :(

"don't you dare think that there is anything, past or present, that I would put in front of you" ouchieouchieouchieouchieouchie

and that's where it leaves off????? growling and barking. anyways!!! this was a wild fucking ride! I don't have words, but yaaaaaaaay another season down :( at what cost. at what freaking cost. I don't know what happens next season, but I am starting to remember them? like watching this season, I knew what happened to some extent, so I imagine it's gonna go like that until s11? I think that's where we stopped? I think I stopped the season we got Jack? not because of Jack, but I think that's where I stopped

s1, s2, s3, s4, s5, s6, s7, s8, s9, s10, s11, s12, s13, s14, s15

[gingerlee-holds]

Pokerants: Teddiursa

idk i find this fun, i like talking about how animals in pokemon relate to animals in the real world- if you're not interested in this series, thats fine i like what im doing and i hope i can teach you guys some stuff

Teddiursa! this little cutie!! #0216

i browsed the Pokédex and these are the facts i gleamed-

they always lick their paws, which are often soaked with honey, they have a habit of hoarding food in hidden locations before winter, their palms taste sweet due to their constant contact with honey, and each set of paws has their own taste due to its absorption of honey

their crescent mark glows when it finds honey, it concocts its own honey by blending fruits and pollen collected by a beedrill, they follow combees to their hive and steal their honey

they lick their paws when theyre nervous, which makes them smile again

and now, screaming time

firstly, the crescent mark glows. how? how does it glow. does it have little LEDs in its head? does it utilize glowing bacteria in its skull? how does it glow huh? furthermore, bioluminescence is utilized to 1) attract prey like with anglerfish, 2) communicate information like with fireflies, or 3) to camouflage itself from predators, like with marine hatchetfish. notice how all of those uses are advantageous in getting food, finding a mate, and avoiding being eaten. that's like the three main things natural selection and life as we know it cares about. what function, really, does its crescent moon lighting up have? when it finds food, it glows? how is that a useful trait, especially since bioluminescence is such a cool trait to have, why is it wasted on "oo i found food glow time"

secondly, it states that the paws absorb the honey. huh? no, thats what the body avoids like hell. the layers of the skin push outward as more skin grows underneath to replace it, there's nothing in the skin that pulls things in. the honey can carry bacteria and viruses and fungi, why would the body allow the honey to be absorbed into the skin. paws are not supposed to absorb things. also,,, i want to know which scientist was going around tasting Teddirusa paws to be able to say they each taste unique cuz they need to be questioned.

thirdly, it can make its own honey. uh!!! how fascinating!!! how!!!! sincerely, how do the pokedex authors think honey is made??? because last i checked, the recipe for honey isnt just fruit + pollen = honey. if it were that easy, we would be making it ourselves and would have no need for apiaries. the production of honey is extremely convoluted, it requires enzymes that only bees can produce,,, actually yknow what? here, lemme tell you how honey is made. first, bees suck in nectar from flowers through their proboscis, its stored in their "honey stomach," enzymes in the stomach begin to break down the nectar into simple sugars, then the bees pass the nectar mouth-to-mouth through the colony to further break down the nectar into sugars and reduce the water content, then it's stored in the honeycomb, where the fanning of the bees' wings evaporate the rest of the water, and then once its finished, they seal it in wax so it can be stored indefinitely. notice something about that: bears cant do that shit.

fourthly, yeah some animals really do store their food over the winter, like squirrels and birds, its called hoarding! they don't have a lot of body fat, so they need to be able to keep their stores high so that they survive when there's not a lot of food freely available. yeah,,, bears aren't one of those creatures! (sidenote, pokemon namers are literally the laziest motherfuckers- Teddiursa- Teddy as in teddy bear, and Ursa from the Latin word for 'bear' like cmon) yes, some bears have been known to hide carcasses for later, like in rivers and things, but this isn't for the winter, this happens in the other seasons! during hibernation, bears rely on their body fat stores to keep them healthy, and this has worked for millions of years!!! they fatten up in autumn, then hibernate in winter, they don't hoard food!!

and fifthly, yes, some animals do indeed have stress-relieving behaviors, the way the "eating honey to smile again" is described makes it sound extraordinarily anthropomorphic, which is to say, ascribing humanlike qualities to nonhuman things. it sounds far, far more like something a child would do, and not something a bear would do. yes that's very cute and an adorable addition, but it ISNT REALISTIC (i know thats the point im just having fun here leave me alone)

anyways yes im having fun with these, i love pokemon so much and i love screaming whenever the pokedex says some jk rowling ass random shit for no reason

[meowmeow-motherfucker]

The Fox & the Squirrel- Chapter 16

Fic summary: Chasing yet another demon in a long line of hunts, the Winchesters get help from an unlikely source. But their new recruit isn’t exactly who she says she is. Savannah is used to looking over her shoulder. Life in hiding doesn’t leave much room for enjoyment, but traveling with the Winchesters just may give her a new lease on life.

Fic pairing: Dean Winchester/OFC Savannah Hart

Trigger warnings: elements of horror and witchcraft, references to past torture/trauma, Crowley is a dick, lies and deception, mutual pining, flirting, sex, typical Winchester shenanigans.

Read it on AO3 here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16242644/chapters/37972217

“You guys are gross.” Sam complained, startling Savannah awake.

     “Huh?” she blinked rapidly, trying to dispel the blurriness from her eyes as she looked over at Sam. She paused when she jerked to a stop, unable to move further. “Why can’t I move?” she asked dumbly.

     “I’d say it’s the two hundred pound hunter lying next to you.” Sam quipped.

     “Oh god,” Savannah blanched when she looked down and saw Dean practically wrapped around her. “What am I supposed to do?” she laughed.

     “I’m leaving it entirely up to you to figure a way out of there,” Sam snickered as he shrugged on his jacket. “I’m going to get some coffee; you want anything?”

     “Jelly donut and strawberry milk?”

     “Sure,” Sam nodded. “Hey listen, if this…put a sock on the door if you don’t want me to come in, okay?” Savannah was sure she turned scarlet.

     “Oh my god Sam!” she whisper-shouted. 

     “I’m just saying.” The younger Winchester held up his hands in defense.

     “Sam!”

     “Alright, alright. Tell Dean I’ll get him something greasy and disgusting.” Sam ducked out, cackling as he went. Savannah did her best to turn over to face Dean, regretting it as soon as she did. Anyone with eyes could see how handsome the man was and being this close was dangerous. Savannah was strong but this...this made it all the more difficult not to charm him.

     “Dean.” The man in question grunted sleepily, shifting slightly when she said his name again. Savannah frowned, unsure how to wake him. She didn’t want to startle or strike him; she was trying to be gentle. She could always- no, it wouldn’t be right to kiss him without permission. Then again, she’d be lying if she claimed she wasn’t curious. 

     Stop lying to yourself, Savannah, you’re dying to know what it’d be like to kiss him.

     She wasn’t actually about to do this, was she? This was wrong. This was stupid. And yet…

     One small kiss couldn’t hurt. Right?

     Savannah inched forward and pressed her lips to his gently, hoping the action would wake him (but also hoping it wouldn’t; the entire situation was so embarrassing). Dean responded immediately, fisting her shirt in his hands and returning the kiss with fervor.

     Okay, maybe this was more dangerous than stupid . She could get used to being kissed like this. There was a hunger in his kisses, a hunger that ignited the eons-dormant fire in her belly and made her long for more. Savannah pulled away abruptly, startled by that train of thought. Dean made a noise of discontent, making Savannah pull back abruptly, running her hands over her face as she sagged into her pillow.

     “Oh god why did I do that?” she asked herself quietly. “Stupid, stupid, stupid-”

     “What the hell?” Dean murmured as he came awake. He perked his head up, rubbing his eyes blearily as he looked around the room. “Did you kiss me?” 

     “Um…”

     “You totally did!” Dean crowed, booping her nose with his finger. “Were you beating yourself up about it?” 

     “Yes.” Dean waved a hand in her direction.

     “Don’t. Wake me up next time,” Dean grunted, scratching at him stubble as he yawned. “Where’s Sam?” he mumbled.

     “Uh...breakfast run,” Savannah supplied quickly. 

     “Awesome,” Dean turned on his side toward her. “You know...there are other things we could do besides makeout.” Savannah gulped nervously.

     “Like what?” she squeaked. 

     “Well that depends...how long ago did Sam take off?”

     “Five minutes?” Savannah offered meekly. 

     “Mhm,” Dean groaned thankfully, his eyes slipping closed as he stretched out beside her. “Well...we’ve got plenty of time. Plenty of options…” he offered leadingly, letting his eyes drift along her blanket-clad form. “Whad’ya say, gorgeous? Could make you see stars if you let me.” 

     “I-what?” Savannah couldn’t stifle the giggle that erupted out of her. “Please tell me that line doesn’t actually work.”

     “Almost worked on you.” Dean flashed a cheesy grin, and she laughed harder despite herself. 

     “Um...thank you, Dean, but I think that’s a little beyond my level of expertise.” 

     “Oh, no sweat,” Dean replied, folding his hands behind his head on the pillow. “I’m just offerin’. If you’re not ready, you’re not ready.” The ball of nerves in Savannah’s stomach unfurled.

     “Thank you.”

��    “Can I ask you a question?” 

     “Sure.”

     “Why’d you kiss me anyway?” Dean asked, and Savannah froze. What was she supposed to say? ‘You were crowding me and I panicked’? ‘I just wanted to’? “Were you curious?” 

     “I...yes,” Savannah admitted. “Have been for a while, to be honest.” Dean’s face widened into a pleased smile, and Savannah let out of a rush of nervous breath. 

     “Well, gorgeous, here I am,” he tilted his head back, eyes slipping closed as he exhaled. “I’m all yours if you wanna kiss me some more now that I’m awake.” 

     “How…” Savannah paused, not knowing if she could handle the embarrassment of admitting this out loud. “I mean...I don’t really know how.”

     “What do you mean?” Dean asked, his eyes darting to her face in surprise. “You can’t tell me you made it this far in life never kissing somebody at least once! I don’t believe that for a second,” he chuckled. “You never snuck out your window to see some guy? Made out under the bleachers after a football game?” 

     “I’ve been kissed, it just...I didn’t really enjoy it.”

     “What was it like?” Dean asked. “Describe it to me.” 

     “Um…” Savannah fidgeted anxiously, wiping her fingers together as she unpacked the memory in her mind. “Fast. Wet.”

     “Wet?” Dean pressed, eyebrows high as he regarded her with concern.

     “Sloppy,” Savannah amended. “And rough. It hurt my lips.” 

     “Oh, okay, I see what you mean. The guy was inexperienced.” 

     “He was...in a hurry, I guess.” 

     “I’m sorry your first was so disappointing,” Dean said sympathetically. “I’d like to at least try to make up for it.”

     “How?”

     “I’ll kiss you, silly. Properly this time.” Dean’s green eyes flicked to hers hopefully before darting down to her lips. 

     “I guess I don’t know what I’m missing.” Savannah chuckled.

     “I could show you...if you’ll let me.”

     “I think you’re the only person I’d let kiss me.” she admitted softly.

     “Yeah?” Dean’s eyes glittered. “What makes me so special?”

     “You make me laugh,” Savannah said immediately. “And you treat me like a person, instead of a trophy.” Dean’s eyes darkened slightly and he frowned.

     “You deserved better than the assholes who hurt you,” he said kindly, drawing closer to her. “Can I kiss you?” Savannah couldn’t deny her curiosity any longer. 

     “What do I need to do?” she asked. Dean sat up, turning on the bed to face her and waiting patiently for her to mirror his actions. 

     “I’ll walk you through it, don’t worry,” Nimble fingers brushed her (presumably) wild hair from her face, hooking the golden strands over her ear. Those fingers danced along her skin, tracing her jawline to her chin and then to her lips. His thumb brushed along the curve of her bottom lip, making the skin prickle as her breaths grew shallow. His fingers moved to the sensitive spot behind her ear, his other hand repeating the hair-brushing movement as he stared at her longingly. A shiver ran down Savannah’s spine as Dean drew closer, licking his lips. “See, the trick is...anticipation,” he murmured, grinning when she fidgeted impatiently, their lips centimeters apart. He leaned closer, so that their noses were brushing, each of them zeroed in on the other with hooded eyes. “Making the other person so desperate they feel like they’re about to burst into flame. Do you feel it?” 

     “Mhm.” Dean smiled at her whimpered confession. 

     “Close your eyes, beautiful,” he whispered against her plump lips, waiting until she obeyed to seal their mouths together in a rush of heat. The press of their mouths was slow, and sensual, and sent shivers racing down Dean’s spine. He felt Savannah’s hands move, hovering over his shoulders as if she wasn’t sure what to do with them. He broke the kiss to urge her to touch him. “You’re overthinking it, sweetheart. Just do what feels right. I got you.” He resumed his slow plunder of her mouth, clasping her a little more tightly when her hands clenched at his shirt-covered shoulders and her body relaxed a little more. 

     Savannah sighed when he pressed their bodies together, fingers bunching in his shirt. Dean paused to be sure she was okay, letting her find his lips before taking the lead again. 

     They’d found a rhythm now, their breath synced up as her timid tongue danced with his. Dean was feeling love-drunk; Savannah was intoxicating him, winding him up and he wanted nothing more than to make her come. His fingers itched to find their way under her panties and make her tremble and scream his name.

     Patience. He reminded himself. Go slow. He pulled away, letting his hands trail down Savannah’s goose-pebbled arms. 

     “Hey.” he said softly.

     “Hi.” Savannah’s cheeks blazed red as she met his eyes, ducking her head to look at the comforter between them.  

     “Was that the first time you’ve ever done that?” Dean asked.

     “No,” Savannah replied softly. “But it’s the first time I enjoyed it.” Dean clenched his jaw angrily, pressing his lips to Savannah’s forehead when she ducked her head.

     The door opened noisily as Sam returned, drawing both their gazes as he stumbled in the room with three cups and a bag of food clutched in his mouth. He kicked the door shut with his foot and set everything on the small dining table. 

     “Good, you’re both up. Come and eat, we have work to do. I found us a case while I was out.” Savannah gaped at him like a fish, mouth opening and closing as her brain struggled to form a response. Behind her, Dean cleared his throat as he shifted awkwardly.

     “You two go ahead, I’m gonna take a shower.” He waited until Sam’s back was turned before darting into the bathroom without a second glance. Savannah snickered quietly, figuring he was just embarrassed like she was. She took advantage of Sam’s turned back to get out of bed and straighten her clothes before joining him at the small table to eat. 

     Sam pushed her breakfast toward her without meeting her eyes, nodding when she thanked him. 

     “What happened to the sock on the door?” he asked as she started to dig in. Savannah froze, mouth poised to bite into her donut. She blinked at the younger Winchester in bewilderment, face burning, as he stared at her expectantly. 

     “We weren’t-”

     “Yeah, okay,” Sam gave a soft chuckle. “Then why is Dean hiding in the bathroom?” Savannah’s face was lava hot now, and Sam was grinning smugly. Savannah clicked her tongue in annoyance. 

     “You heard him; he’s showering!” she argued defensively.

     “That’s not all he’s doing.” Sam muttered at his egg-white omelet, laughing when Savannah choked on her donut. 

     “We just kissed!” She whisper-shouted around her food, making Sam smile.

     “And it’s about damn time,” he said. “Just remember what I said about the sock for the future.” 

     “Oh my god, shut up.”  Savannah hid her face in her hands, wishing the floor would swallow her whole. The bathroom door opened and Dean made his way to the table, rubbing his hands together excitedly. He claimed the open seat at the head of the table, bringing with him the smell of his body wash.

     “So what’s the case?” he asked, taking a huge bite of his bacon egg and cheese sandwich. Sam debated for a moment whether to tease his brother, but elected to let the moment pass for Savannah’s sake. He wasn’t sure she’d be able to look him in the eye for a while. He rolled his eyes at his brothers bulging cheeks and turned his attention to his phone, pulling up the news article he’d been reading.

     “So get this-”

[destinygoldenstar]

Golden Analyzes 2002 Nominees “Ice Age”

*Have Seen Prior*

Starting off the 2002 Oscar Nominees, we’re going in alphabetical order.

We JUST have to watch the first one for this. We don’t have to watch any of the atrocious sequels. THANK GOD.

I’ve seen all the movies. I’m pretty indifferent to their existence. But in terms of objective quality, the sequels are quite shit. BUT the first one I remember being fine.

And I am predicting of the five we have to watch, this one will be the weakest. I mean, when competition is Lilo & Stitch, Spirit, Spirited Away, & Treasure Planet… yeah.

And by the way, unlike last year, I have seen ALL five of these movies before. (My GF hasn’t seen the two spirit movies)

Let’s get going…

Reaction:

Bold is my GF’s words

“I like how the streaming service title screen has the squirrel front and center, which makes me think Scratt is the main character.”

“Oh look it’s the main character!”

“I was always confused why he’d want to put the nut in the ground. Don’t they do that in the spring?” “It’s Ice Age. THERE IS NO SPRING.”

“That’s not how ice works”

“He has nature itself targeting him. Op, you broke our land, now you suffer eternally… Ice Age is secretly hell.”

“They never see him either. He must be a god.”

*You can play extinction later!* “So they’re playing dead?” “That didn’t look like they were playing dead that looked like they were swimming in… not gonna say.”

*Animal falls off the cliff and dies* “How did that get past the censors?!” “Died of stupidity.” “How did that get scripted and animated and no one said ‘hey maybe this implies something and we shouldn’t have it’”

“Oh yeah I forgot about this” “I always feel so bad for Sid. His family abandoned him and does not love him. They came back in the fourth movie just to drop off his grandma cause they didn’t want her either. It’s so messed up.”

*Isnt there anyone who cares about Sid the Sloth?* *Nope* “That’s depressing.”

“I survived Shrek. I watch Total Drama. It’s grosser than this. I can manage.”

”He’s just like me.”

“Kicks him off.” “😂”

“This is literally just Shrek again.” “Yep.” “Im not saying they’re ripoffs.” “Yeah, considering they get another guy and a baby and theres no women.” “😂 There’s no women?!”

“Oh, Manfred? I thought it was Manny for the longest time. I didn’t know he had a full name.”

“These humans models do not hold up.”

” I just feel so bad for Sid. His family abandoned him. They tied his hands and feet and barricaded the cave door and covered their tracks so he couldn’t find them- THAT IS MESSED UP!!” “…I was just focusing on how he wasn’t even covered by the rain.”

*Scratt Appears* ”Oh hey it’s the main character.”

“Nature HAS to actively be against him. This is secretly Hell. Ice Age takes place in hell.”

*Jumps off the waterfall* “…they’re both dead.”

”They also tame wolves, I don’t think these humans are the good guys. Don’t hurt animals.”

“Because we’re so much more complex and capable of doing whatever, we tend to make a lot of bad choices. Cats for example don’t have existential crises. They just want to roam around and nap.”

“I’m sorry, we’re you expecting me to jump off a cliff?!”

*you’re an embarrassment to nature, you know that?* “😂”

*You two are a bit of an odd couple* *There is no us* “😂 This movie is these three forming a polycule. That’s it. That’s the plot.”

“I just realized how many fat jokes they make with Manny.” “He’s a mammoth. He’s supposed to be that size.”

”Oh this is hell right here.” “Yep.” “Ice Age is hell.”

“This is me with babies. Everyday.”

“…I think I would die if that happened to me.”

“We always quote ‘the last melon’ in our house. All the time.”

“I thought dodo birds were a seventeenth century thing.”

*dodo casually dies* “WHY ARE THRY SO CALM ABOUT THAT?! A DUDE DIED!!”

“This is how the dodos went extinct.”

*unison* “The last melon.” “The last melon.” “😂 I’m sorry I had to.”

*Dodo bites Manny* “I DONT REMEMBER THAT. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!” “What?” “The flipping bird went up his anus!” “…he bit his tail. What are you talking about?” “Didnt show it!”

“And then he smashes it.” *smashes it* “Yep.”

“Actually, that was the best thing he could’ve done with that melon.”

”A tree is better than you Sid. A TREE is better than you Sid.”

”Hey look it’s the main character!”

“They CAN see him. Who would’ve thought? Or is it ‘Huh, this invisible force is wrestling my face!’”

“Thats how I sleep.”

“Ooh the eyes.”

“…what?????”

” I don’t like how those lady sloths look…”

“🫣” “WHAT?!” “Excuse me, what?!” “You want to make babies with a guy you just met?!”

*You just keep marinating and I’ll be right back* “🫣” “MARINATING?!” “I don’t want to be here anymore…”

*It’s hard to find a family guy* “THIS HAS TO STOP. How many movies are gonna break me?!”

”Two bros chilling in the hot tub five feet apart cause they’re not gay.”

“Just breaks his neck and kills him.” “Yeah.”

“Wait is he actually gonna kill him?!”

*I don’t eat junk food* “OOOOOOOHHHHH” “That’s actually a great roast.”

“Why is there a gizzard in the Ice Age?”

*I don’t care who started it I’ll finish it!* “Me and my family in a nutshell.”

“Hey look it’s the main character!”

“If that’s all it takes to cause an avalanche of that size…”

“Oh it’s a museum… a museum of corpses.”

“Uuuuuuhhhh… what??? It’s the Ice Age. Excuse me?”

“Reminds me of something from Ninjago Season 5.”

“Hey look it’s the main character!”

“That looks painful! Grinding your nails on the ice… UGH…”

“Hey look its the main character!”

“That doesn’t look like tag. That looks like something else. And I don’t want to finish that suggestive sentence.”

“Why is that the best scene in this entire movie?”

“I think they completely forget about this in the sequels and never bring it up again. It’s part of the canon that Manny had a wife and kid that were killed.”

“How is there snow if there’s hot lava? It’s hell. There’s no other way. Ice Age is hell.”

“Three bros chilling in the lava, five feet apart cause they’re not gay.”

*Why don’t you make it realistic?* “Why are there so many fat jokes in this movie? My gosh.”

*Hey lovebirds* “😂Come on…”

“Oh god it’s moving. It’s coming to wreck havoc on us all!”

“Hey look it’s the main character!”

“It’s an acorn. How does that work?”

“I think he just killed all of them…”

“Uh… I think that tigers dead since he can’t get out of there.”

“OH… that’s actually a brutal death. We all talk about how gruesome Disney Villain deaths are, but never anything else…”

“…you know that if there weren’t any more sequels, Diego would’ve stayed dead. This was so fitting to end off his story.”

“You just see a giant mammoth holding your baby and you’re just like ‘okay’.”

*I got nine lives* “Yeah, sure. I like you and I wish you were dead.”

*Global Warming* “Yeah! We’re in hell!!”

“Hey look! It’s the main character!”

“I’m sorry, WHAT? Two thousand years?! How’d he even get in ice? What?!”

“How long does this take? How does he not DIE?”

“Okay, I can get it when it was ice, but ROCK-it’s a cartoon, what am I saying?”

“And that’s your confirmation. Ice Age takes place in hell.”

“I can’t believe the main character was barely in the movie. SMH.”

Review:

Ice Age The Movie’s main setting is HELL and I will not be convinced otherwise. This is THE TRUTH BEHIND ICE AGE.

BUT HEY, THSTS JUST A THEORY-

During this movie, me and my GF made these two running jokes. One was that the movie took place in hell, and that the main character was Scratt. Because the main streaming service page where we watched this heavily advertised THE SQUIRREL as the main character. It was funny.

Idk why this squirrel is even in the movie, he serves absolutely zero purpose or relevance to the story at all, but you know what? He is epic and that’s all that matters.

Ice Age is known NOW as the franchise that won’t die, and I’ll bet in ten years it’ll give The Land Before Time a run for its money.

Btw, if you want my opinions on the sequels: I stopped after Collision Course and didn’t see anything after that. And all the sequels are atrocious dumpster fires that add NO value.

Can we go back to the days when this was just one solid film?

Subjectively, as someone who hates babies, I am naturally bias against this movie. I’m kinda half joking. But other than that, this movie is just a very simple story about these three animals trying to get a human baby home, and along the way becoming a polycule-I mean found family.

That’s all it needed to be.

And without all the irritating characters from the sequels, the movie can focus solely on its meme worthy comedy and it’s central characters.

The comedy’s kinda a mixed bag for me personally. You can tell Shrek had some inspiration. It’s that way for a lot of movies. Some bits are memes for a reason. Others kinda had me scratching my head.

“Yeah! Global Warming! We’re all gonna die!! We’re in hell!!”

There’s A LOT more jokes about DEATH than I remembered.

I mean, I never actively cringed at anything like I thought I would, so that’s impressive.

I also think this found family dynamic works. It helps that the movie takes its time to explore all three of these guys and their distinct personalities. I totally buy that they’d bond the way they did.

Diego’s probably my favorite character in the movie. I mean if you don’t count the ironic side of things (SCRATT ALL DAY BABY). I think his redemption was very natural and well built up to, and his sacrifice was decently touching.

If there weren’t any sequels, you know he would’ve stayed dead.

Or not. Kids movie. Idk.

Sid just very casually has this really F’d up backstory and family life and it drove my GF insane a couple of times.

At least in this movie, while he’s not a top tier comic relief character, he was never awful or irritating. I can use those adjectives for a bunch of other comic reliefs.

There really isn’t too much to say about a movie as simple as this. With other movies, there’s more of a psychological thing to talk about in either it’s theming or characters. But this movie’s simplicity is just that blatant. Not saying it’s a bad thing.

And the animation is… well… it’s 2002, whatcha gonna do?

The animation is the ONLY thing that is superior in the sequels. In this first movie these are some very blocky models and some really bland backgrounds. The humans do NOT look right.

The scene where they animate the cave art to tell Manny’s backstory is the highlight of the movie for a reason. At least for me.

Very well done scene where the art style and animation tells the story. No dialogue. No words. You see it and you understand it.

It’s nice when a kids movie respects the kids and understands they can pick this sort of stuff up for themselves. Kids aren’t stupid.

It’s BAFFLING to me that the sequels completely forget about this very vital backstory of Manny’s and never being it up again. BUT I DIGRESS.

What? Is taking death seriously crossing a line? Don’t wanna make the kids sad. That’s not the brain rotting mush you want in sequels.

This first movie is actually a lot darker when you think about it for more than five seconds.

The story is about these starving sabor tooth’s that want to eat a human baby, and then the mother of that baby falls to her death to save him. We witness the dodo’s extinction. And quite possibly one of the most underrated villain deaths in an animated movie in terms of gruesomeness. Like DEAR GOD…

It’s not very chill.

But I appreciate a movie that doesn’t shy away from death as a concept. Again, respectful to the kids who shouldn’t be treated like morons.

I really appreciate this movie’s existence and what it’s done. And I feel SO BAD for Blue Sky.

BUT WHAT ABOUT SCRATT?! THINK OF SCRATT!!

Anyway, continuing with 2002, Lilo & Stitch is our next movie.

#shrek#shrek 1#animation#best animated film#animated movies#dreamworks#dreamworks animation#movie review#movies#reactions#film review

[greensleeve]

🎃October diary🎃

I used to think September was my favorite month but...maybe it´s actually October? Anyways, I decided to make a little diary about this wonderful month in a form of random pictures taken by yours truly. There will probably be part 2 too because I already have so many pics and it´s only the middle of the month)

I´ve had some nice autumny hiking action, first of all...

A lot of random squirrels everywhere too (I love them) (and I love the pose the squirrel is giving me)

And these two pics are so poetic??? How is Lahti capable of looking this pretty lol

I managed to find a clover too??? In October??? (and some 2 ml syringes next to it, probably for drug use, ewwww)

Also I have been cycling so much and also gymming in the gym (no pics though)

(Been experiencing a lot with the color red so lotttts of red lipstick and red nail polish. Toe nails too. I´m in my red era clearly, uh-huh💋why are my nails so chipped in that pic though, ew)

Oh and I went to a guided walking tour in the Finnish National Opera House. It was nice but now I kinda feel that some magic has been lost because I´ve now seen what happens behing the stage lol. So in short, I played myself

I also went to this one art exhibition. Didn´t like it because it was so repetitive and straight up just fucking ugly (not in a good way) but maybe I just don´t understand art like that. (Also the tour guide kept staring at me the whole time?? Awkward. Like dude just let me enjoy this ugly art in peace lol. Maybe he sensed my distate for the art)

Also during one of my cycling sessions I witnessed the most rainbowiest of rainbows. The pic does NOT do it justice, it was sooooo huge and rainbowy in real life, like damn

Another cycling trip and all of a sudden I saw a shit ton of swans??? There were at least 50 of them. The hell??? Don´t they live in pairs, how have they managed to get together like this? Imagine the planning it takes, the logistics, this swanspiracy? Yeah I don´t know anything about swans

Also lots of hot chocolate with marshmallows (and whipped cream too for the hell of it) It´s not the healthiest but damn it´s what you´re supposed to do in fall, you know?

I Also...

-went to see the movie Joker 2. Quite the shit show haha

-went for a pumpkin spice latte with a colleague/friend, it did not taste good though? Disappointing but the carrot cake muffin was yum

-called 911 for the first time in my life, nothing huge though

-randomly met an ex colleague from years back in a grocery store and had to shoot the shit for a while, was very nice

-randomly stumbled on three different stores that all happened to have some huge sale going on. I bought socks and protein drinks and a very pretty tray for my perfumes hehe

-went to a museum, it was nice and cool and got there for free too which was random

-discovered the TV show called "The Great" which is about Catherine the Great and it´s so good??? I don´t watch any TV (House of the Dragon being the only exception) so binging this has been weird but hey I have one more season to go so...

-donated some money for a local animal shelter because hell yes

(okay why has so many things happened to me in just 2 weeks? Just realized)

[happytapirstudio]

May 2024 Book Log

(bold means new this month)

The Balkan Wars: Conquest, Revolution and Retribution from the Ottoman Era to the Twentieth Century and Beyond by André Gerolymatos

The Chronicles of Prydain Book 1: The Book of Three by Lloyd Alexander (half-reread) (finished)

The Chronicles of Prydain Book 2: The Black Cauldron by Lloyd Alexander

The Dinosaur Lords by Victor Milán

Dinosaur Summer by Greg Bear

The Fire Within by Chris D'Lacey

Graceling by Kristin Cashore (unfinished)

My Good Man by Eric Gansworth

Orochi Volume 2 by Kazou Umezz

Pegasus Book 1: The Flame of Olympus by Kate O'Hearn (finished)

Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi (reread)

Safe Area Goražde: The War in Eastern Bosnia 1992-95 by Joe Sacco (reread)

It looks like I've read sooo much this month but that's a fucking lie. I should redesign how I present this information. Or like. Maybe just not have so many books open at once.

Anyway my perception of time this month has gone absolutely sideways, and while typing this up, I realized I totally forgot I'd finished reading Pegasus.

What the fuck. Was that ending.

I have similar thoughts on The Fire Within even though I'm not done with it yet...like I guess YA authors circa 2010 planned their whole series out in advance and were totally okay ending on cliffhangers and/or making their entire first book some weird prologue that dances around the actual heart of the series for several hundred pages. I'm over three quarters of the way through The Fire Within and we have yet to have any big dragon reveal. Genuinely thought that was going to happen in chapter three or four. Then I'm like "well certainly by the halfway point." Then "well perhaps it'll be part of the climax, near the end." No go fuck yourself straight to hell, D'Lacey said. Squirrel drama all the way.

Another note on that book: when I initially started reading it, I was really digging the writing style. It had a nice cadence, really flowed off the brain quite well. "Ahhh," I said to myself, "I see why this book was so popular in its day." I don't know if I was just in some special state that night, or if the first couple chapters really were a cut above the rest, but I'm not so in love with the writing now. It's very Disney-esque, in a way I can't elaborate on; which is charming at some times and frustrating at others.

And I genuinely don't understand why David is so caught up with these squirrels. Like 80% of this book is squirrel-related; the dragons (ostensibly what the book is about????) occupy a much smaller space, and information about David himself is laughably scarce. We get a couple throw-away sentences about college, and next to nothing about his childhood or personal life, which makes it that much harder to understand why these squirrels have become the focal point of his life.

Also there is no way in heaven or hell that this book is set in Massachusetts. D'Lacey's British and all his characters are British. Factually. For starters, no single person in the United States is unironically eating toast and beans.

And that's fine???!!! Like apart from the note in the beginning (which I missed the first time) and a joke about the President, there is no strong indication that this book takes place in the US. Nor is there a reason for it to be in the US. This is a very British story, a very British setting, and very British characters with decidedly British mannerisms. It makes me wonder if the story was written to be in England, but some editor went, "Hmmm I think kids would be more interested if this was set in New England instead." Loser.

But yeah. Chalk another one up under Tapir Reads Books Everyone Else Was Obsessed With In Elementary School. This one's for you, Shaun.

I was also really looking forward to Dinosaur Lords, which is part of a trilogy set in an alternate Earth that's juuust enough like real Earth to make you go, "I think that woman's supposed to be Russian", except no one actually calls her Russian. Though they do speak Spanish, Italian, etc. Except it's not called Spanish, Italian, etc. Which is a little aggravating, because, between the giant cast and this slew of dinosaur names, there's already a lot to keep track of. Having to remember Milán's made-up name for Spain, England, Romania, etc. on top of all that is making this book a lot harder than it needs to be.

Enough bitching let me find a few compliments about this book. Ummmmmm. Well there are homosexuals; I can get behind that. He also makes good use of the dinosaurs in his book: reconstructs convincing images of them, builds them fairly well into this alternate reality. I really locked in once we got a chapter from the Allosaurus's perspective. Like YES that's what I'm talking about!!!

But our two main characters are your run-of-the-mill Strong Independent Men, and I've really had enough of that in general. So in addition to stumbling over this exposition I'm holding back my groans every time we switch back to Rob (yes that is his fucking name Rob and yes he's fantasy Irish) and Karyl.

I think part of my frustration, apart from having high hopes, is that a lot of the things Milán does in his book that tick me off are things I've done in mine. And subsequently edited out, even before reading Lords, because I knew they were dragging down the text. I'm not well-versed in High Fantasy in any way, so I can't exactly compare these techniques with the standard--though I'd say, given the genre's tendency for pulling esoteric magic systems and fictional landscapes out of its ass, this is probably on par for the course--but I can compare it to my own work, and that fills me with no insignificant amount of dread.

Okay let's end on a positive note. Persepolis fucking slaps and I'm so glad I'm rereading it as an adult with a fully-formed brain. Thank youuuuuu Marjane Satrapi.